#jester is cp right

[in-parkour-civilization]

The gays guys as animal hybrids,,, yeah 👍

Evbo: Hare, specifically not a rabbit bc I think hares look cooler or maybe a frog

Seawatt: Fox or perhaps Scorpion

(God PLEASE have someone know the story I’m talking aboutjnrjdisjsj,,,,,,,,,!!!!!!!)

Emf: Cat !!!! :3 !!! Kitty !!! Black cat specifically. Mysterious fucker >:(

Aj: one of the big ass animals. Maybe a bird of some sort. Used his wings 2 cheat instead of barrier blocks,,,,,,!!!

Pkv/Jester: idk. Jesters are a whole different breed 2 me. Maybe another fox tho bc I’m not very creative.

EVBO IS SO FROG TO ME SRRY. seawatt is totally scorpion. but i also see him as like sand cat or kit fox specifically or like. caracal.

EMF IS SO CAT CODED THANK HYOU yes i a gree with aevrything

[solunest]

TW GORE

I spent an ungodly amount of time to fulfill that anon ask, that I had strangled CPS to make a GIF inside of an illustration, turning it into an animation, so here's the drawing process of Heavenly tearing Mafia Boss!Sun asunder;

Aaaaand some honorary sketches that I liked from that process;

So, I had to go back reread how I described Heavenly to look while they're like this, and all I could remember was that they're covered in stitches, they have half of an endoskeleton, their head can swivel 360 degrees, and Sun had twisted his and Moon's celestial wires together and shoved them in their chest, the afton virus was only just starting to infect them, but it was spreading fast, and Heavenly had to figure out how to string the cords together (of which they did too tightly, but for some reason I didn't know how to portray that properly).

Fun fact, as you can imagine, the design for the celestial wire is, of course, inspired by the original fanfiction, but from what I read, especially from the excerpt when Vigilante is making a deal with Mafia Boss!Eclipse to get a celestial wire for Detective!Moon, is that Vigilante describes it as being delivered to them on a coil...? So, I was thinking it was like...an actual wire? However, I loved looking at @pure-plum's art for Sleuth Jesters, and their version of the celestial wire was thicc, so uh...I did both-?

Someone had asked me why they looked very masculine, and I said, while mostly this version of them is really just a placeholder, considering that they become very malnourished and such, but one of the main reasons were that Heavenly was always gonna have that big hole in their chest and I wanted to draw that sometime in the future (that anon ask came at a right time), and didn't want to figure out how to draw that hole with tiddies. Plus, I, myself, am a guy, so I can easily use myself as a reference.

See y'all in the bonuses!

[seaoftales]

Sure, Shanks had mentioned that his adopted daughter might stop by to learn and hone her skills in swordsmanship, though he never really expected her to follow up on that desire. Mihawk was a strict teacher, he didn't allow for any lax behaviour, and he required all of his students, as rare as they were, to fully dedicate themselves to the craft and art of wielding a sword. Given that Rya was a smuggler, he had his doubts on how that would go, and she was raised by Shanks on top of it as well. That alone should have made him say no, but he was doing a friend a favour, and surely she couldn't be that bad.

❝ Trust me, I haven't exactly anticipated the jester to be amongst us either. This was always meant to be a venture between me and Crocodile. At least with Buggy posing as the head of the organization, he's taking most of the heat, which allows us to do the work we are actually meant to do. ❞ He still didn't get the chance to go out and lay waste to one or the other Marine they'd put a bounty on, though he hoped he would get the chance soon. His fingers were itching to decapitate the one or the other idiot he was forced to work under for years.

The barrels had, of course, caught his attention, eyes widening just a little, and by the gods did he try his best not to look like a child on Yule being presented with a pile of presents. His own stash of wine he managed to save before leaving Kuraigana was running low, and the barrels were filled with his favourite. ❝ Vintage Tarapacá? Now that's hard to come by these days. I probably shouldn't ask where you got that from. As for your question, yes. Shanks did get in contact with me concerning your training, and I agreed to do it as a favour for an old friend. ❞ If she proved to possess the right talent for swordsmanship, he'd happily continue training her.

❝ Information does sound... tempting, especially with what we are currently setting in motion. Akagami did complain some time ago about a headache caused by the knowledge of you having some on and off thing with a CP agent? Think you can get some information out of him? ❞

Color her surprised when Mihawk had greeted her just as she was stepping off her ship.

"And I thought the old man had killer observation haki." She groused before the fishman, Resh stepped off behind her, carrying a few dozen cases of Mihawks' favorite wine.

"Actually, Mihawk, I came to chat with you. About training. Shanks suggested learning how to wield a sword if I run out of bullets at some point. I'm good at dealing with daggers, but swords, I never got around to it." She looked towards the circus tent before frowning slightly.

"Never figured you'd take up with Clowny and 'Couldn't crack a smile without gutting someone'." She groused before looking back at Mihawk. "Shanks did contact you, right?" She asked. "If not, you're welcome to take a free shot at him if you two meet up." She sighed before rubbing at the back of her head. Shanks swore that he had a good connection with Mihawk.

She motioned at the barrels of wine Resh had brought onto land. "Of course, I'm not going to make you train me on good standing alone. I'll put my business skills to work to bring in supplies for your group if needed. Treasure isn't just gems and gold. It's information, supplies, and anything that can be used to make your network go."

[ambrial-blog]

Somehow Stolas managed to talk him into it. they headed back upstairs passing the bouncer who looked up quizzically a Blitzo. 

Blitzo grumbles, Damnit now he is going to make a scene.

They had slipped backstage, Blitzo in Stolas’s arms he really didn’t want to see the lewd jester- not tonight, not ever.  Stolas was trying to right his wrongs from the night.  Ausmodeous: The Ares Goeita King stopped him. 

“What are you doing back here, can’t you read the sign” 

Fizzorolli was atop of Asmodeous's shoulders staring directly at Blitzo. 

Blitzy, doesn’t want to play with Fizzy!  Stolas says jabbing  a finger into Asmodeous's chest. punctuating each word with a jab of his finger. 

Aussie: Now come-on, were practically related, let the little ones play,  Fizz has looked forward to seeing BlitzO for some time now. you wouldn’t want to break up best friends would you Stolas?... like that marriage of yours... you know, I should call Cam, he works in CPS.. he could take BlitzO away from you. the king of lust threatens. 

Blitzo: How young do you think I am! 

Fizz: I want to play with BlitzO, make him play with me Aussie! the jester leers at the Boss imp who rolls his eyes.  He was done with this psycho circus years ago. he should’ve just took off when he had the chance. 

Fizz: you will play with me BlitzO and like it, it will be like old times,  before you bombed.. guess the spotlight can’t shine on both of us. cackles the jester. 

Stolas continued to rake Ausmodeous through, calling him every vile name he could think of.. and some new ones. he continued berate the king of the Goeita’s for nine hours.  that is until Fizz crawled down Aussie back and crept behind the prince.  Blitzo’s grip tightened.  

“I should’ve taken Striker’s offer when I had the chance thought the boss imp glaring down at the homicidal Harlequin who was reaching up towards him. 

“Come to Fizzy! he cackles... I’ll take good care of you BlitzO. 

The Boss imp hisses. . 

Suddenly the sound of spurs catches their ears, standing in the doorway dripping wet: stood the ominous figure of a cowboy.  drenched in blood.. his eyes were locked onto Blitzo who eyes were wide and fearful. 

“Who the hell is that?” cackles the clown. the tension in the air crackles as Striker pulls out his blessed revolver and aims it at Stolas’s head. Panicking Blitzo tries to scramble down from the prince’s arms. 

He had no weapon, “well Shit!” Blitzo curses looking up at Ausmodeous for help. Why he couldn’t bring himself to look up at Stolas. as the pain of rejection seared through his heart. he swallows the lump forming in his throat. 

The scarlet imp tackles Stolas to the ground just as a blessed bullet peppered the wall behind him. Aussie moves swiftly. he needed to disarm this threat fast before it got out of control. 

Fizz tackles Blitzo to the ground, wrenching him from the owl. 

“We need to go!” He shouts hauling the imp over his shoulder. 

“Who the fuck called him?”  is that the imp from the Harvest Moon festival?” Stolas asks while ducking underneath a table. 

“Who the fuck knows” answers Blitzo trying to get out from beneath the clown, but I have a fucking idea! he growls.  

“Thought you were into cowboys, BlitzO”  Fizz cackles.  

“Didn’t know the birdbrain, had a hit on his head, or else I would’ve done it myself” 

Fizzorolli’s eyes widened, as a bullet zips right past him. 

“You know he could easily kill Aussie too” growled Blitzo. 

Fizzorolli’s eyes widened in horror,  his eyes scanning the room. No sign of the lust demon. 

Its time to leave! Fizz snaps winding his arms around BlitzO, Blitzo gasps as Striker turned his sights onto to Fizz... 

“Well shit, he’s after you” Fizz declares hurdling Blitzo right into the cowboy. 

“oof”  Striker caught Blitzo wrapping both arms around the imp, Blitzo buries his head into the cowboy’s chest. the scent: of Tabaco and fresh air hit his nose.  the gunslinger aimed his gun at the prince.  

“Striker please!” Blitzo begged. “Just take me home, I’m done with tonight”  Striker gritted his teeth. it would be so easy to end the prince’s life, to collect his due and then leave with partner in tow. 

“Why shouldn’t I?” he asks. 

Blitzo swallows thickly,  not wanting to look the cowboy in the eyes. “tonight was a mistake-  Blitzo mumbles. “I should’ve listened to you-”  

“I should’ve- 

Blitzo still feeling a knife pressed to his back. “But ya didn’t sugar-cube, at least you learned your lesson.. let me finish up here and we can collect the bounty on his head Striker purrs tracing Blitzo’s face with his knife. 

“That shrew of a woman you work for,  what if she puts a bounty on my head next, then what! you gonna hunt me down too” 

“Sure well, but it’ll be different with you, once I’m through here- I tend to go after  each one he holds dear..

Blitzo hands splayed out over Striker’s firm chest: he could feel every muscle in the cowboy’s chest as the Outlaw gave a low rumble.  Striker cranes his neck, as Blitzo continues to kiss nipping lightly on his collarbone Striker gives an appreciative moan smiling wickedly at the trapped Goeita prince. 

“What are you trying to start, Boss man?” 

Blitzo looks desperately at Stolas, trying to bide some time for the prince to make his escape.  Stolas was stunned once again in complete silence as he watches Blitzo make out with another imp. 

Striker chuckles darkly,  his tail wrapping around Blitzo's waist.  he could feel Blitzo reaching for his blessed handgun. He lets out a guttural growl, snapping up Blitzo’s wrist before striking, his snout burried into Blitzo’s neck as he licked a sensitive spot. 

Blitzo gasps, as Striker’s fangs latches on his neck. “Fine, the prince lives for now” thought the cowboy. “But I’m not leaving empty handed. 

He takes out his revolver, aims it at Stolas. Blitzo slumps into his arms the venom already in effect.  

Bang! the prince clutches his shoulder feeling the bullet burn. he doubles over: the last thing he sees before he passes out is Striker scooping up his imp, and carrying him out: past what was left of the bouncer. 

Blitzo comes awake momentarily as Striker saddles up behind him, with a whip of his tail: he propels Bombproof into a gallop. 

Stolas crawls out from his hiding place, hand clutched over his shoulder. Fizz peers out from atop of Ausmodeous blinking owlishly. 

[margoshansons]

The Killing Kind (6/?)

Part Six: 01. 02. 03. 04. 05

Summary: Being a superhero is hard, especially when your Dad is making up threats to satisfy his own ego.

Warnings: Action, panic attacks, slight angst, slight manipulation

Notes: These chapters are making me so happy! I’m so proud of these past two parts and I love the story I’m forming in my head. Also, heads up, this one is LOOONG. 

“Listen, you need to get out of here” The plaid-clad figure urged, ignoring her question. 

(Y/N) shook her head, “Peter, I know it’s you”

He kept looking over his shoulder, the familiar gesture cementing her theory in her head. “You need to get out of here.”

“No” (Y/N) protested, “I can help. I--I can lead it away”

Spiderman shook his head, “No, you need to get out of here. The green guy told me to lead it away, but you need to leave now” 

Before she could protest further, another wave hit the two of them, washing the jester’s mask away as he climbed up the wall, swinging between the collapsing buildings.

(Y/N) followed him, running through the streets, not caring about the people she was potentially bulldozing. As she ran over a bridge,(Y/N) felt herself collide with a wall of muscle, and she looked up to see Brad staring at the newly formed monster. 

“(Y/N)!” Mr. Harrington called, “thank goodness you’re alive, we need--” She pushed passed her worried teacher, following the trail of webs and giant spectacle her father and Peter were creating in their wake. She hurried to a stop in front of the piazza, the belltower beginning to collapse. 

(Y/N) gasped at the sight of a brown head of hair atop the tower, arms stretched in an obvious attempt to web the tower to safety. 

Her yellow sneakers skidded to a stop behind the tower, her father ‘battling’ the monster behind her. Closing her eyes, she dug into her gut, tendrils connecting in midair. She brought her hands in a circular motion, the energy creating a clocklike image in the air before her. Green swirled with blue to create a bright teal color, (Y/N) screaming as she launched the sigil onto the clock tower, the energy keeping the tower in place long enough for the illusion to dissipate. 

A wave crashed over her once more, knocking her out of concentration. 

Her shoulder burned as it collided with the ground, her hands throwing out one last ditch effort to hold the tower up, the energy curling around the debris before her. She heard cheering behind her and let go, the illusion gone. Quentin’s eyes were hidden behind that ridiculous helmet of his, but she knew what expression lay behind the smoke. 

Pride. 

Not in her. Not in Spiderman. Pride in himself. 

He was finally getting everything he wanted. 

It almost looked like he was getting ready to approach his soaking daughter, wishing to help her up, but (Y/N) bit her lip, watching as he sped into the sky. 

Same as always. 

***

“Buzzfeed is saying…” 

She tuned Flash Thompson’s rant out as MJ brought her another ice pack. (Y/N) brought the ice to her head, nursing the concussion Hydro man had given her. Her teachers whispered about witches, her friends whispered about aliens, while (Y/N) stewed in the true knowledge of what had really happened. 

“Hey” Peter interjected, standing next to the moldy staircase the two girls were sitting on. “Are you...is everything okay?” 

She didn’t respond, her eyes still wide upon discovering the fact that Peter was, in fact, Spiderman, even if he denied it. The mannerisms were too similar, their voices identical. 

“(Y/N)?” Peter asked, concern lacing his voice.

She sighed, throwing herself out of her reverie, “Yeah, I’m fine. I mean my head hurts like a mother, but other than that.”

Peter nodded, obviously a little bit pleased to see the best friend of his crush was okay. The three of them turned toward the TV, which was recounting the events of the day. 

“...L’uomo de Mysterio e donna de Energia…”

Brad’s voice overpowered the television at that statement, “I think his name is Mysterio.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, “That means man of mystery in Italian dumbass” she went back to paying attention to the news, ignoring the chuckle from Peter. They were hailing her dad as a hero, just as he had planned. 

“What I want to know is who was with him” Betty Brandt called from Ned’s side. “That girl just appeared and suddenly she’s able to hold up one of the biggest structures in the city with her hands?”

“Maybe they’re related!” Ned interjected excitedly, “It would make sense, they have similar abilities”

Unable to handle any more talk of how heroic her father was, she wrapped the blanket around her once more, fatigue finally settling into her bones. She stood up, retreating into her room. (Y/N) curled into her bed, staring at the wall in front of her, the events of the day replaying over and over in her head. 

Her dad had really gone through with it. He was killing innocents as he had planned all along. His words looped over and over in her head like a dead vine. 

“This power needs the right person to wield it. No matter the consequences.”

He’d said the same thing after the incident, the same thing as he exploited her for his experiments. No matter the consequences. 

Nothing was going to stand in his way. Not even his own blood. 

(Y/N) wiped a tear at the awful memory, caught off guard when her phone began to buzz. May’s name lit up the dark room and she swiped to answer. 

“Hello?”

“(Y/N), thank goodness you’re alright” May’s soothing voice rambled over the phone, “I was so worried something had happened to you, especially after Peter told me about your concussion.”

(Y/N)’s eyebrows creased at the news of Peter informing his Aunt about her condition, “I’m fine, May, really I am. It sounds a lot worse than it is.”

“Is everything okay? You sound distressed,” 

For the first time since knowing the woman, (Y/N) cursed May’s emotional sixth sense.

She swallowed down her nerves, considering the ramifications of letting May know about her Dad. There was a good chance he had tapped her phone, listening into the conversation right now. But he couldn’t reach May while he was overseas, she knew that in order for the illusions to work he needed to be on location. So maybe it was safe for a bit.

“It’s my dad” (Y/N) confessed, her heartbeat spiking into her throat, “He’s followed me here”

“Hey, hey” May continued, “relax, everything is going to be fine. Your dad can’t harm you. Not unless he wants European CPS breathing down his neck.”

(Y/N) slowed her hyperventilating, saltwater burning on her mouth. “Are you sure?” 

May sighed before reassuring her, “Listen, you’re eighteen, so legally you are emancipated from your Dad, and even before that you filed an emancipation letter that the shelter and your lawyer signed, so it’s illegal for him to do anything that goes against what you specifically filed in that letter.”

(Y/N) sighed in relief. 

“That includes hurting you.” May finished. 

“Thanks, May,” She replied, sniffling. 

“Anytime sweetie” May responded, “Let me know if you need anything okay? I’m always here to talk to, and take care of your head, please? For my sake.”

(Y/N) chuckled at the woman’s worried tone, “I will, I promise.”

“Alright, see you in two weeks” May hung up the phone after (Y/N) reciprocated the farewell. The student stared at the open window of her hotel room, MJ’s empty bed giving her an option that she hadn’t considered in a long time. (Y/N) gathered up her courage and stepped outside onto the small balcony, gazing up to the roof. She looked to her watch, the faded leather device betraying how late it actually was. Without any hesitation she began to grasp hold of the balcony above her, climbing her way up the building like it was the scaffolding she was used to. By the time she made it to the roof, she could see all of Venice, and she noticed she wasn’t alone in her idea. 

“Hey stranger” (Y/N) offered, sitting next to him.

Peter jumped at the voice, relaxing when he saw who it was, “Oh, hey (Y/N), I-uh didn’t see you there.”

“Is everything okay?” (Y/N) echoed his sentiments back at him, watching his face for any sign of his secret identity. She was at least eighty percent sure he was the person she thought he was, but here he looked like a scared kid. 

Peter sighed, “Not really. I mean, we just barely escaped a water monster and my Aunt is freaking out and I have no one I can talk to about what I’m feeling, especially after Mr. Stark--”

“Hey, hey” (Y/N) comforted, taking his hands in hers, carelessly brushing the top of his palm. “Everything’s going to be okay. Mr. Stark would be proud of you. I don’t think he’d have given you what he did if he wasn’t.”

Peter sighed, eyes slightly wide at the implication, “I told you, I’m not--I’m not Spiderman,”

“Who said anything about Spiderman?” (Y/N) asked, catching Peter in the confession.

He chuckled at the small bit of manipulation, “How did you, um how did you figure it out?”

She pushed another curl behind her ear, “You’re really bad at keeping secrets.” was all she said, instead of admitting that she’s been watching him since he got the internship. And even closer after MJ told her what happened in DC. 

“I guess” Peter chuckled, staring out at the city before turning toward her. “How did you get up there today? On the roof?”

(Y/N)’s smile dropped at the question, unsure if she should tell him about the part of her she’s hated since she was a little girl. Unsure if she should admit that the only reason she’s so powerful is because her dad forced her into a life she didn’t want. 

Her body seemed to go against her better instincts, and her brain supposed that Peter deserved some truth of the situation after getting identity exposed like this. 

“I have something I want to show you” (Y/N) admitted, taking her hands out of Peter’s. His brow crinkled in confusion at the cryptic statement, but he crossed his arms, ready to see what she wanted to show him. 

She opened her palm, allowing the energy to dance across her fingertips, illuminating the dark rooftop. 

Peter’s eyes went wide at the display, hands reaching up to his face in awe. “You--You have, You’re like--You’re like Scarlet Witch, but like with blue powers, you’re the Blue Witch!” He exclaimed, rambling excitedly. 

(Y/N) sighed in relief at his reaction, unsure when she began to worry about what Peter thought of her. “Well, I hope I have a cooler name than that” She chuckled. 

Peter’s eyes lit up like they did when he solved a difficult equation, “Mysterio said they called you Hourglass back on his earth, apparently, you had some sort of connection to time. He thought it was you on the streets today, but he wasn’t sure.”

(Y/N) extinguished the energy at that statement. “Wait, you talked to Mysterio?”

“Yeah,” Peter nodded excitedly, “He told me how relieved he was to see you alive in this universe, since you, you know, died in the last one.”

She shook her head in disbelief, “Wait, this universe?” “Yeah, there’s a multiverse, that’s where Mysterio came from.” Peter explained, “Or I guess I should call him Beck. He said that Hourglass and him were related back on his earth, I think they were brother and sister.”

Peter stopped as he realized the words that were coming out of his mouth, “Maybe your father is this universe’s Quentin Beck, that’s why he seemed so shook when he saw you.”

(Y/N) bit her lip as he got dangerously close to the truth. So that was the story he was going with. An interdimensional being sent here to chase down whatever had attacked them that day. 

“Peter, you need to calm down” (Y/N) grasped his hand once again drawing his attention back on her.

“Why?” Peter asked, “This is amazing news. Not only do I have Mysterio to talk to about superhero stuff, but I have you as well. Now we can take down those elementals together!”

(Y/N) was speechless at his proposal. Whatever Quentin had said had already warped Peter’s mind. 

“Peter, listen to me,” (Y/N) gripped his hands, a serious expression crossing her face. “You can’t trust him. You can’t.”

“Why not?” Peter asked, his smile dimming.

(Y/N) sighed, ready to admit the whole sob story. If it was what it took to make Peter listen, then it was necessary. She just hoped he would forgive her. 

“Because he--Mysterio, he’s...”

But all it took was one look in Peter’s eyes. Those big brown orbs were reaching so far for hope, she saw something that she had lost so long ago. 

He was finally happy to have people who understood him. And she wouldn’t take that away from her. 

“You just can’t.” She lied instead, chest twisting, “You just have to trust me on this okay?”

Peter nodded, his gaze drawing itself back to the lit up city, hand still intertwined with her own.

Thank you for this positive feedback! I’m still trying to figure out how to write Y/N’s powers, but I hope this is good enough for now. If you have any ideas let me know!

MASTERLIST. 

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[pinkevilbobdoesthings]

This one-shot is more like a pilot. I'm just trying out a few different ideas and seeing what I like and what other people like. 

So umm... I have no cool how to describe this AU except bonding through the foster paretning process? IDK guys here’s “Takes a Village”.

_____________________________

Jester should’ve realized that it was going to be a weird day when she saw her neighbor crying on the stairway. It was the one who lived across the hall with his cat and always had his nose stuck in a book. His head was down in his hands and soft sobs came from him.

“Are you okay?” Jester asked.

He looked up at her his blue eyes rimmed red. Hurriedly he wiped his eyes and got up. “Yes, I’m fine. Sorry, I’ll get out of your way.”

Jester frowned at this, but there probably wasn’t much she could do. “Well, okay. But if there’s anything I can do for you let me know.”

“You can marry me,” he said.

“What?!”

“Sorry, bad joke. I wasn’t thinking,” he said. But it almost sounded sincere when he said it.

Jester tugged on his coat sleeve before he could get away. “Are you sure you’re okay? Cause I’m pretty good person to talk to about your problems, you know.”

“It’s nothing for you to worry about,” he said. But, he looked so weary that it didn’t feel right to leave him alone. “Besides you’re a complete stranger.”

“My name’s Jester! There, now we’re not strangers,” Jester said with a smile. “And I’m going to worry no matter what, and if I don’t know what’s wrong, I’m going to worry even more. So you might as well tell me.”

A slight smile crossed his face and then he sighed. “If there’s no other way out of it, I suppose I should talk. My name’s Caleb Widogast, and there’s this girl.”

“Oh, lady troubles.” Jester nodded sagely. ”I know all about those.”

Caleb blushed bright red. “Not that kind of girl. She’s 14 and here-” He pulled out his cellphone and showed Jester a picture. It was of a small teenage girl all wrapped up in bandages and covered in an oversized hoodie. She was flipping off the camera with a defiant smile. “Her name’s Nott and she practically lives in the school’s library, where I work.”

“She looks real sweet,” Jester said.

“She is,” Caleb said with a fond smile which quickly faded. “But her situation’s a bad one. Her family, I knew it was bad, but I found out yesterday that it’s a lot worse than I realized. So I’m trying to get her out of there.”

Jester frowned. “Why don’t you just call CPS?”

He shook his head. “Not without a plan. There’s no way I’m letting her get lost in the system. She’s too young to be emancipated, so I was going to get signed up to be a foster parent and maybe even adopt her someday.”

“That’s a lot of work isn’t it?” Jester asked.

Caleb nodded. “But, she’s worth it. Only thing is this state has a law against single men fostering girls.”

“And so you asked me to marry you.”

“Ja. It was a silly idea. A bad joke really,” Caleb said.

Jester gave it some thought. “Yeah, I mean you could just have me foster her for you.”

“What?”

“Well, yeah if single woman can foster girls, then it shouldn’t be an issue, right?” Jester asked.

Caleb stared at her with disbelief. “Why would you do that?”

“You said that she was in a super bad situation and you obviously care about her,” she said. Caleb nodded. “So, I’m not out anything trying to help her.”

“It will take a lot of work,” Caleb said. “I can’t ask this of a stranger.”

Jester tapped her chin with thought. “Then how about we become friends? This is something you can ask of a friend.”

“I don’t even know if you can be trusted with children,” Caleb said. “And it takes months to fill out all the paperwork.”

“Then you’ll have plenty of time to decide if you trust me,” Jester said. She held out her hand. “So what do you say? Deal?”

Caleb frowned at her hand and, with a reluctant sigh, shook it. “Deal. You have no clue just what you’ve agreed to.”

“That’s the fun part,” Jester said brightly. “But, you’re going to help me, right, friend?”

Caleb laughed. “Right, friend.”

______________________

 At first this was going to be a marriage of convenience AU, but since Jester could just foster Nott on her own the marriage part felt completely unnecessary. Out of the one shots this is the one I'm least sure of, but I still wanted to see what other people think.

[pika-plushie]

I got a yes!

@chill-and-gay you lovely bastard thank you!

Warnings: Abuse, explicit character death, kids (just kids. Nothing angsty about the kids), weed, mentioned arrests, body mutilation

Alright, so my boy Nugget is a train wreck from day one when he was born June 24th, 2002! His real name Is Jack Vulpes, born to Sarah and Jimmy Vulpes!

His father was an abusive man trying to get himself out of old.. Habits.. As he'd realized he was doing some fucked up shit.

However, when Nugget's mother died giving birth to him it sent him into a rage that he never really let go of. He blamed it all on Nugget. He killed her, it was his fault and he'd pay for that so he'd go days without feeding Nugget, locking him up in the basement of his home and keeping him locked away in solitude.

He worked in a prison that had been experimenting on it's prisoners to test a breakthrough in biological engineering, giving it's "patients" animal parts (a fact that ties in with another character of mine, Snake) and through that he learned what eventually became the cause of Nugget's most iconic feature, the pair of shrunken yellow hawk wings that sit on his head. He strapped Nugget to a broken metal table, forcing the then 3 y.o to endure the painful procedure.

As Nugget grew up, living on the bare minimum amount of food his father would give him, he saw a young girl through a small window close to the ceiling and climbed up. After getting her attention the two began to try talking but it was difficult as Nugget barely knew any words. So Lily, as she'd introduced herself, began trying to teach him.

Lily knew something was up but didn't really have any evidence to back her claims so she watched and tried to help where she could.

The two would talk for hours while Nugget's dad was at work, Nugg's vocabulary steadily growing until one day his dad took a day off and as Lily came right as his father swung a bat at Nugget, hitting him right in the stomach. She ran and got her parents who called cps and the police, trying to save the boy they'd never met. When the police arrived Lily and her family stood outside of the crime scene when Jimmy pulled a gun on a police officer. As they all tried to circle him he shot Lily as a distraction before grabbing her while the officers were shocked and running into the woods. Nugget himself panicked and ran away, scared for what would happen and for his future. He wandered into a small neighborhood on the outskirts of a city before collapsing on a sidewalk where he was found by Troy and Jay who took him in.

From 14 to 16 he lived with the two, slowly but surely catching up on all the learning he'd missed over the years until one day there was a knock on the door and a very familiar blue uniform stood on the other side.

Troy and Jay were stoners, it wasn't a surprise that they would be busted eventually and Nugget knew that but he didn't immeaditly realize what was happening.

All he saw were the blue uniforms. So many memories began swirling in his head and he panicked and ran. He ran far, far away until he could no longer here the shouts of officers behind him.

He was scared. He was just a kid, he just wanted a normal life. He didn't know what to do so he wandered. He wandered until he found a small camp with three people, also runaways and misfits, sitting and staring at him.

So he stayed with them.

It was a bumpy ride with new people occasionally joining and leaving their little group. It started with Clue, someone who used to know Jester the original member of the camp, and what started out with rivalry ended up being a marraige with a son. By the end of it, the small group continued for generations, long after the mortal members had passed.

Nugget himself had a pretty uneventful death, lung cancer from his father smoking around him when he was young. He passed in his sleep, with his son by his side.

[jokers-sweethearts]

Jokers Daughter Imagine: Present for a Princess

Request: (anonyous) Can you do a imagine about Joker getting CP and gift and her reaction? You can fill in the rest with whatever you want. Just please make it reader x joker :) thnx

tw: trichotillomania

////////

Joker ran his golden knife over the mans throat, each inch it progressed he dug it in deeper and deeper. The terror of feeling the pain build up was enough to make his heart stop, but he stayed alive pleading for the clown king to spare him. 

“Pl...please sir I have a family! Kids at home I need to get to!” his voice cracked as his knees began to burn from the tile floor beneath him.

The Joker’s red lips spread into a cryptic smile revealing his metal teeth. 

“Ya know.... you have a good point!” he pulled the knife away from the employee and tapped it on his forehead. Leaving a small blood mark. 

The man took a deep breath and held it, not believing what was happening. He could taste the freedom so close.

“Need to get home, to the kid. You’re right! This is taking way too long!” In a flash all the man’s joy washed away as the blood sprayed from his throat. It covered the floor around him as he collapsed. “How selfish of you to keep me away from my princess” Joker huffed as he kicked the man’s skull and watched his lifeless head roll around.

The clown king of Gotham turned around to see the toy store being lit on fire by his henchmen. The corpses of all the employees littered the ground. He threw his head back and cackled when he saw Frost walking towards him, giant teddy bear in tow making it almost impossible for him to walk.

“Want me to load it up boss?” Frost said casually, almost like he didn’t even notice the mayhem around him. It made Joker smile even wider. He had done such a good job with Johnny, he was completely immune to the rampage and just focused on work.

“Hmmmm....” Joker growled. He stalked around the teddy bear and Frost like a lion circling it’s prey. 

After all these years with Joker, Frost was good at hiding his emotions, but inside he was fucking terrified. He gulped so loud he was sure Joker would carve out his adam’s apple. 

“Needs a little something” Joker murmured under his breath, not talking to anyone in particular. He raised the knife up to the bears head and wiped the blood off, leaving a stain. “Perfect! Put it in the car” he commanded adjusting his silver jacket and following Frost out.

The henchmen noticed their boss leaving and tried to follow, but just as some of them reached the door Joker slammed it in their face and held it as they fought with the handle. 

“Sorry boys! Looks like there’s no extra room with the bear!” Joker whistled and Frost appeared behind him with chains and a lock for the door. He avoided eye contact with the men he just met last week. 

No liabilities, Frost though to himself. It was just routine. 

Joker got in the car and roared the engine, bobbing his head back and forth to the screams of the burning men like it was his favorite song. Within seconds he was gone and the gcpd showed up to the toy store. 

Joker peaked in the rear view mirror at the toy for his princess. Like he had completely forgot all he just did, his daughter consumed his thoughts. He couldn’t wait to bring it to her and have her love and attention all for himself.

.........

You sat in the living room occasionally glancing over to the window out to the driveway. It was so unusual to wake up in the morning and your father be no where around. Uncle Johnny wasn’t even there to tell you where he’d gone. You tried to kill time by doing the usual. Sneaking clothes from your mother’s closet, target practice in the underground gun range with your father’s golden AK, working on your mother’s motorcycle. Now you sat on the couch doodling tattoos you dreamed of on your leg. You tried to perfect the skull your father had on his chest. 

You tired to imagine what he would be doing. Maybe at the club or fighting with batman. Just the thought excited you, always eager to hear the stories when he got home. If he got home... whenever he was out for too long a part of your mind always wondered if maybe another arkham stay was at hand. You shook your head back and forth and pulled your hair to stop the bad thoughts. You knew you weren’t supposed to but you couldn’t help it. You pulled more and more, one strand at a time. The thought of losing him again to that horrible place was too much. Those thoughts gave you flashes of your mother being gone for so long. Locked up in belle reve then stolen again for squad. 

The hair building up in your hand almost covered your entire palm. You snarled and threw it on the ground before standing up and going over to the window to look directly out. You’re stronger than that. You’re the goddamn clown princess, you said to yourself. Don’t be ridiculous he’ll be here soon. If not you’ll make those fuckers pay. You felt your ego and anger building up, gifts inherited form the man you awaited. After you finished reassuring yourself, you saw the purple lamborghini pull up, you felt like a god for a moment calling it perfectly. 

Then you saw the bear, a maniacal smiled appeared on your face. You should have known he was gone on your account. You felt silly for ever denying that. Racing to the front door, you took a deep breath trying to forget the hair on the floor, before unlocking the door and opening it wide for him to enter. The bear came first brought in by Frost followed by your father. 

Seeing him standing tall, towering over you, dressed so nice and confident in his purple shirt and silver jacket, gold chains swinging, you felt safe in his presence. Like nothing could hurt you, even yourself. You wasted no time jumping up into his arms. Feeling the gold rings on his hands rub your back helped you even more. You took some of his green hair in your hand just to feel it, just to know he was real. For a moment you didn’t give a shit about the bear, just happy he was back.

Joker felt the pride surge through him. This is exactly what he wanted. 

“Miss me huh?” he chuckled.

“Of course I did, don’t trick me like that again”.

Trick? Joker was confused for a second but ignored it to focus on his baby in his arms. 

“So you gonna accept your gift daddy worked so hard to get for you, princess?”

You released him from your grip and turned around to grab the bear. You held it against you tight before the smell caught your attention. You’d recognize it anywhere, one of the first smells you remember experiencing besides being held by Harley and smelling her skin. 

You pulled back from the bear and your smile grew even wider, the blood stain warmed your heart. Your father always paid attention to detail.

“Oh daddy I love it thank you!” you squealed at him.

“Yeah yeah yeah” Joker tried to play if off tough but inside he was feeling on top of the world, not that he ever doubted he really was. “Frost!” he hissed “get started on the replacements!” Frost shook his head and followed his orders.

Joker took a seat on the couch and propped his feet up. 

“You and that bear get over here and join me princess” he patted the spot on the couch beside him as he grabbed the remote and flipped the news on. His favorite part was coming up, when he showed you all the news reports about the damage he had caused. Better than any movie for him. 

As he waited for you he noticed the excess amount of hair on the couch. It led his icy blue eyes to the floor where he saw the clump. Fuck... he whispered. When he saw you headed over he kicked it under the couch. 

You plopped down and snuggled up next to him. You felt his strong arm around you and all your fears went away. Everything about arkham was just a distant memory now. You hugged the teddy bear next to you and felt complete bliss.

GCN began their announcement, showing footage of the toy store almost completely burned to the ground. The body count plastered on the tv screen.

You looked up at your dad with a huge grin and congratulated him. But Joker wasn’t paying attention. For the first time he wasn’t intrigued by hearing about himself. He held the remote up and switched off the tv. He clenched his fist around you so hard he was sure his palm would start bleeding. 

You stupid fucking clown, you shouldn’t have left her alone. You should have waited for Harley to be back, you should have left someone with her. He frantically searched through his mind for everything to blame so he didn’t have to blame himself.

A sinking feeling entered your chest and shot down through your stomach. He knew. He always knew. 

“Daddy I’m sorry I couldn’t help it” you said deadpan, you were sure he was just as exhausted with this as you were. “I got scared when you were taking long. I didn’t know if the rat got you or... I don’t know. But I stopped it myself I promise” you glared at the ground so you wouldn’t have to look him in the eye. 

You remembered what Harley had taught you, when you were little and the hair pulling first started. Your mom taught you to focus in on something specific and learn everything you could about it.

You chose your father’s shoes. A solid black with a small golden jester placed just below where his pinky toe would be. It was helping but the urge to touch your hair was growing more. Until you felt your father’s fingers under your chin.

He forced you to look up at him then took your entire jaw in his hands.

Joker looked deep into his daughter’s eyes. He wasn’t angry, he could never physically feel anger for her. It wasn’t worry either. He had a fire burning in his stomach. The same fire he had when he was searching to rescue Harley. It was determination, a lust for control. He placed his mile tattoo over her mouth so he could see a smile on her, before kissing her forehead and getting off the couch.

You were confused but sat patiently waiting for him. When he returned he had something closed in his hand. A ring? A necklace? A bullet? You thought about the usual gifts he gave when you were upset. But when he revealed what it was you were even more confused.

“This is your mom’s favorite, so don’t rat me out kid” he said as he opened up the purple nail polish.

Without hesitating or explaining he took one of your wrists and rested in on his knee, turning his body fully to face you, one leg propped on the couch. His touch was more gentle than usual, you were used to him being more rough even when he was trying to be comforting. His back hunched over to focus as he painted your nails. Some green strands of hair fell in front of his eyes. You used your free hand to brush them back.

“There we are! No one can do that better than me, huh?” he cackled as he began to paint his own nails. He resumed his usual position facing the tv again and switching it on.

“Daddy I don’t understand” you spat out, your voice was raw and almost cracked, feeling tears begin to form. But you held them back.

“Don’t paint the other hand” he demanded in a low and stern voice. You use that hand to stop the other. It’ll look like someone else stopping you. It’ll be me stopping you. He tossed the nail polish behind him when he was finished and showed you his hand. His gold skull bracelet dangling as he waved it around. “See? next time you want to pull you grab your wrist just like I would. You can pretend it’s me now. Focus in on the nail color. Like your mother told you to do. Pretend it’s me” he looked you directly in the eye, you felt the intimidation and you liked it, sure his eyes would burn holes through yours.

You cracked a small smile looking down at your hand, you loved learning that you and your father were alike. It sounded like your mom had taught him that trick too. 

“I was just... scared... you know it’s hard for me to admit that but it’s true”.

“Hey!” Joker shouted grabbing your chin again. Within seconds his emotions changed, he went from stern and commanding to gentle again. “Would anyone ever beat me? Would I ever not come back to you?” he opened his mouth slightly, revealing the metal teeth and waiting in anticipation for the answer he already knew.

“No...” you said faintly. You hoped this method would work in the future. But you put it all aside for now.  You just wanted to focus on him being home.

“That’s my girl” he growled. He released you from his grasp and turned back to the tv. He extended his arm for you to curl up next to him again. You took the opportunity immediately. He wrapped his arm around you and held you tight against him. A silent reassurance that he wasn’t going anywhere.

You closed your eyes and rested your head on his chest. Right where you knew the skull tattoo was. You let out a sigh that turned into a laugh. Now you felt on top of the world.

“Ah ya see that there!” Joker pointed to the tv, the camera was directed at the body bags being wheeled out of the ashes. “That’s all me, princess”.

You smirked and your eyes glistened watching the corpses being handled. 

“One day I’ll do it with you”.

Joker’s heart returned to a regular rhythm when he heard you say that. There were only two people that could control how his heart beat and one of them was in his arms right now. He felt powerful, in control.

A door slammed behind the two of you making you jump in his arms. Joker barely flinched and turned around to see a stranger before him. Frost followed and opened his mouth to introduce him, but he wasn’t fast enough.

Joker put a bullet through the man’s head and his body fell to the floor.

“..Boss that was the new guy you asked me to-”

“Did I ask you to interrupt us?” Joker snarled. He was furious to be interrupted but even more furious that his princess was scared.

Frost shook his head waiting for the same fate as the man next to him.

“Clean that up” Joker said turning his attention back to his little girl.

Frost sighed in relief that the attention was off of him. But now he was the one who’s heart was pounding. He took a glance at the girl on the couch. Frost envied her, but more so he was afraid of her. How she dealt with his boss as a father he’d never be able to understand.

It was just another reminder. Whether burning people alive or gifting his princess with a teddy bear, the Joker was unpredictable. The clown family was unpredictable.

[jokers-sweethearts]

Headcannons of Jared and Joker helping their daughter through an asthma attack?

Jared remembers his own asthma attacks when he was a kid and teaches her different coping methods he used.

Joker already has her golden inhaler on stand by he had made special with the jester emblem, having hired a henchman just to carry it for her.

Joker gets a power dynamic is taking it from him and helping his daughter use it.

Harley is in the background yelling at all of them, her PhD side coming out insisting Joker isn’t using it right, meanwhile Cp is gasping for air.

Jared sits her down after she’s recovered and goes over the steps with her on her medicine and how to treat herself. Wanting to teach her to be on top of it but also worried and wanting to help her himself.

[jokers-sweethearts]

Clown Princess Headcanons: Diagnosed

Request: (anonymous) Hey I’d like the request some headcannons on what the Joker/Harley would do if CP was diagnosed with Autism. 

If she doesn’t smile then Joker and Harley won’t smile so she doesn’t feel out of place or alone, they let her draw lipstick smiles on them and they will draw one on her.

When she finds an interest in something they will get anything and everything she needs for it to master it, dedicating an entire room or part of the house to whatever it is.

She get’s a particular interest in jesters, crafting statues and string puppets to decorate the house in. It’s where Joker got the inspiration for the golden ones on his car and the tattoo on his back.

Joker and Harley refuse to ever let her consider changing the way she is and acts, that being against everything they are and think themselves. Any doctor who tries will be found in the Gotham harbor with every piece of medical equipment they have in their gut.

They help her cope with the things she has trouble with, reminding her their clown family is above everyone else and they’l be damned before they change her.

Her comfort items include Joker’s gold dice bracelet, she is the only one with the freedom to take it off his wrist when she needs it.

When she feels overwhelmed and anxious in situations she carves into Harley’s bat, it’s how it got the markings it has today. 

She never has to worry about going unnoticed or worry about how she will get attention for herself because Joker and Harley don’t feel complete unless she is included.

She’s more literal in her approaches vs Joker and Harley’s figurative.

Has a hard time making friend which hurts her self esteem, Joker and Harley remind her she doesn’t want the friends who don’t recognize her greatness and never let her feel like she doesn’t have them.

Any goon that says something bad to her will have their skin peeled off and placed on top of a mannequin to decorate the club with.

She’s eccentric in what she does, her parents always encouraging her never to tune it down because it’s exactly how they want their family to be.

She get’s sensory overload at the club with the loud music and lights so Joker has a sound proof room decorated just as she likes which connects to his VIP booth. So she can know he’s there but also relax away from that environment.

They won’t touch her unless she gives the go ahead, being in her presence is enough for them, reminding her that she is royalty and what she says goes.

When she gives permission, Joker takes the opportunity to the fullest and holds her and kisses her cheek where the ends of her smile come.

She will always either have Joker to drive her in the purple lamborghini or Frost to drive her behind them, never having to second guess or worry about her motor skills. 

When she get’s frustrated or impatient in situations with other people Joker will pull out his gun and shoot them ending it for her so she doesn’t have to deal with it.

They don’t want her to feel self conscious when she blurts things out or is very blunt, they remind her how proud they are seeing her be tough and speak up.

When she get’s anxious and over thinks, Harley sits with her like she used to do with Joker in arkham and talk it out with her.

She has hyper-empathy which acts as the contrast to her parents lack of empathy, she helps them see the other side and conquer situations they otherwise couldn’t. The goons and business associates greatly appreciate her for this.

When she has trouble understanding something, Joker is always a master of finding a difference way to phrase it or explain or twisting things to her to help understand and see side she didn’t before.

She wants to dance but isn’t confident in her skills or abilities at all, so Harley takes her to the club when it’s closed and teaches her and dances with her however she wants to.

When she struggles with communication, Harley will write down what her daughter could be thinking because she’s always the best at guessing. She shows it to her and points until CP signals she has it right.

She’s nervous to reveal her big interest in painting things gold, so Joker asks her to paint all the batman masks for his dancers to wear in the club showing her she doesn’t have to be afraid or embarrassed of what she likes.

Joker and Harley always leave their door open a crack for when she has difficulty sleeping, she can climb into their bed and wake them up. She usually finds her dad waiting unable to sleep himself.