#jemma’s thoughts

[lonelystarbuckslover13]

You know what’s a crazy butterfly effect we never talk about?? The musical film ‘Grease’ eventually leading to Olivia Rodrigo’s fame. Think about it:

The film ‘Grease’ was released in 1978, and its immense success led to the sequel ‘Grease 2’ (1982). In 1999 a script for ‘Grease 3’ was developed, but the project was shelved until 2004 when the script was adapted into ‘High School Musical’. ‘High School Musical’ was then released in 2006, becoming an instant hit and earning the film two sequels. The movie series had such lasting fame, that in 2017 a TV show inspired by the film series was developed titled ‘High School Musical: The Musical: The Series’ (‘HSMTMTS’ for short). Olivia Rodrigo was cast as one of the leading roles in the show, and was given the opportunity to write an original song for her character - the song she ended up writing titled ‘All I Want’. Upon the release of ‘HSMTMTS’ in 2019, ‘All I Want’ began gaining popularity and charted on the Billboard Hot 100. This gained Olivia interest from label executives, and she ended up signing a record deal with Interscope/Geffen. During Olivia’s time on ‘HSMTMTS’ she met and dated a fellow co-star, and their subsequent break up inspired her to write the song ‘driver’s license’. She then released ‘driver’s license’ as her debut single in 2021, and the song charted at number 1 and skyrocketed her to a whole new level of fame.

So without ‘Grease’, you wouldn’t have ‘High School Musical’, and without ‘High School Musical’ you wouldn’t have ‘HSMTMTS’, and without ‘HSMTMTS’ Olivia would not have written the song that got her a record deal or met the person who inspired ‘driver’s license’, and THAT is how Grease led to Olivia Rodrigo’s fame over 40 years after its release.

[spacelessbian]

The Giggle is truly like: the Doctor (52) and Donna (54) meet the Doctor's ex-companion Mel (59) and her boss Kate Lethbridge-Stewart (58) to face the Toymaker (50). And then the Doctor (31) shows up to save these senior citizens from themselves.

[expelliarmus]

[obito-in-disguise]

| Derealization |

noun. de·​re·​al·​i·​za·​tion (ˌ)dē-ˌrē-ə-lə-ˈzā-shən. : a feeling of disconnection from one's surroundings.

There’s a hole in my chest. A vacuum seems more appropriate. If I stand in front of mom’s full-length mirror long enough, I can almost see it.

It’s dark. Deep. It tugs at my whole being.

It itches...no, it aches. When I fill it with things, it feels better for a while. I’m happy.

But on my way to read to Mom that evening, I catch my reflection in the TV screen. It’s empty again. I should try more things next time.

I told Mom about the hole. She looked confused.

Jemma and Dad don't get it either. No one seems to. Maybe it isn't real…

That evening, we all eat dinner. Everyone’s talking, laughing. I just observe. Something feels wrong I never feel fully here.

I close my eyes. Reach out. I can almost touch it. The glare gets in my eyes all the time.

It feels cool under my palm The glass pane that separates me from everyone It’s so clear, no one else seems to notice. But I do. It’s always there, keeping me on the outside.

Somedays, I see the whole thing. Not just its clear panes It’s a box. Everyone’s inside. I’m not.

The vacuum aches again. It tells me to fill it. "Talk to them," it urges. I try.

Eyes turn to me. I speak. They nod, but I see it the glances, the subtle pauses. They know. I’m the outsider. Or so I think.

I speak again, they don't hear me Everyone goes back to their conversation It didn't work I console the vacuum

At school, when I do well and they praise me, the hole stitches up a little. For a moment, I almost feel whole. Jemma calls it external validation. I call it my elixir.

Life is a game Everyone's played it a thousand times I'm still on level one I'm never quite sure what to do.

I close my eyes As I so often do I rest my head against the box and peer in.

I hate the box It keeps me out but It's the only thing with me on the outside. Maybe I'll be stuck on level one forever or maybe one day, it'll let me in.

A/N: Just a little poem about my feelings. This is my first ever poetry related anything, so criticism and helpful takes are very welcome! Also would be neat if anybody relates to this so i know I'm not crazy thnx.

[autism-swagger]

Bus Kids more like. Bus kids.

[lilychxn]

one thing about me is that I am never normal ever about Blackstairs

[rudikawhy]

Even at the risk repeating myself, I have to talk about Iain De Caestecker's phenomenal acting.

Coming straight from S05 E14, that's the episode I want to talk about. Because even though I absolutely HATE the Doctor, I still am amazed by him/Iain. The Doctor and Fitz are two different characters, but at the same time the same. They practically look the same (aside from clothings), but we can still them apart. The moment that "Fitz" took off the welding mask, I exclaimed "Oh, please don't!", because just because of his facial expression I knew it was the Doctor.

Iain plays the Doctor so differently, so repulsively, that I am too impressed by Iain that I don't really have time to hate the Doctor anymore. In this episode, having the Doctor and Fitz opposite each other, was... something. It was really painful to watch Fitz seeing the Doctor for the first time since the Framework, I felt so sorry for him, but I also felt my heart breaking. Not as much, though, as later when 1. The Doctor was mimicking Fitz's stuttering, 2. Fitz realises that he IS the Doctor, that he has done all those things, and 3. Daisy says she won't forgive him.

It was a really good, but also really tough episode, and I'm not sure wheather I can watch the whole episode more than once.

I can say for sure, though, that I can watch the second to last scene multiple times. Deke telling Jemma he's their grandson. That she and Fitz will be alright. How his mother has always talked about Fitz. The tears in Jemma's, but especially Deke's eyes. It's all really beautiful.

[winnie-the-monster]

[amelia-mariee]

characters calling themselves by their official ship name is my favorite thing in media omg

[lonelystarbuckslover13]

The fact that I now have your best american girl by mitski AND all-american bitch by olivia rodrigo and both are bangers about how hard and exhausting it is to be an Asian woman in western culture is just *chefs kiss*

[livvyjulian]

can we talk about the emotional dependence that some tsc characters have to their partners? it’s honestly scary and it’s very romanticized!

PD: janus is a great example of that :)

[marrr444]

Julian in early/mid Lord of Shadows has kind of, kiiiiiiiind of maybe good 4 you energy

Like,

Maybe I'm too emotional but your apathy is like a wound in salt

Maybe I'm too emotional or maybe you never cared at all...

...You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks...

..Well good for you you look happy and healthy not me if you ever cared to ask good for you you're doing great off without me baby god I wish that I could do that I've lost my mind...

Ect. Ect. You get the point. Probably.

[daddyslittlegirlofsammy]

Did you guys knew that Kate and Gwen was in a show together?

link: <3

[tiredgatt0]

That scene of Simmons yelling out: "Where is the sun?" while on a different planet, lives in my heart forever

[borrowthemoonlight]

conceal, don't feel. (insp)

[rudikawhy]

It's been two months and five days since I've started Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Today, I finished the very last episode. (I know I'm making this more dramatic than it is, but idc)

So, it's been a lot. So many good, great things, but also a lot of weird, disturbing things. Characters I loved all the way through (Hunter, Piper, Davis, Sousa, every Koenig (I think)); Characters I almost loved all the way through, except for a few episodes where they made some choices I didn't agree with or so (Fitz, Simmons, Bobbi, Coulson, Daisy, May, Deke, Enoch); Characters about whom I wouldn't say I loved them but I still liked them very much (Mack, YoYo, Trip, Mace, Flint); Characters who weren't exactly the good guys but still were somewhat likable to some extent (Ward, Radcliffe, Cal, Gordon, Jiaying, Sunil Bakshi, Robbie, Kora), and of course Characters who were written to be hated (The Malicks, Garrett, Whitehall, Lucy Bauer, Ellen Nadeer, Ivanov, Kassius, the Hales, Izel, Sybil) and everyone who I don't know in which category to put, or what to name their category.

I am so glad, that the phase in season five where I couldn't stand Daisy, was over as soon as season six started. I was surprised by how MUCH I loved her in season seven.

Season six was definitely my least favorite (and of what I've read I'm not the only one with that opinion). But I can't say it enough, how much I loved the parts in space of Piper, Davis, Daisy, and Jemma (and later only Daisy and Jemma) searching for Fitz and Enoch. I can't think of one single moment right now from that space part, that I didn't like. But I really hated Izel and this whole shrike thing, and Sarge and his team, so I was really glad when season seven started.

Because season seven started off just absolutely great! I already said that I loved their clothes. Sending Jemma in as Peggy Carter in the 50s was perfection. Daisy saying she already has a sister to save, her name is Jemma Simmons. May falling through the ceiling, punching Sybil and saying "The Cavalry". Fitzsimmons naming their daughter after a star. Piper's wish from Jemma being getting Davis back. The team meeting up (at least) once a year to catch up and not losing each other. All of that is perfection.

There is so much more I want to write about, but first, I can't put everything into words (right now), and second, this post would be way too long.

I am so glad that I started Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and I'm even more glad that I continued watching even though the first five episodes or so didn't convince me at all, and at first I only stayed because of the characters.

I am thankful for everyone involved, but especially those who decided that these wonderful actors would get the role they got, because honestly? I couldn't have asked for a cast that was more fitting.

I will start re-watch soon (at least in parts), because friends of mine started watching, but I have yet to convince them that it gets better than it currently is (they are in episode four).