#jello speaks

[superiorjello]

Sometimes I think about this one scene from Strong Woman Do Bong-Soon and it makes me go feral

Bong-Soon is trapped in a room, tied to a chair with a bomb strapped to her. She can't free herself because her super strength has abandoned her. The door is chained shut on her side. Her love interest, Ahn Min-hyuk, is on the other side of the door. He can't get in to save her. The rest of the building is evacuated, they are the only ones left inside. There is less than a minute left on the bomb. Bong-Soon is SCREAMING for him to leave her, to save himself, because she messed up and can't access her powers and so can't save herself, but he doesn't have to pay for her mistakes. And he smiles, and leans against the door, and tells her that there's nowhere that he would rather be.

Of course her powers come back and she saves both of them and the plot goes on. But like... I haven't seen this show in YEARS, and that scene lives rent-free in my head every day. The screaming, bawling fear of Bong-Soon. The quiet acceptance and love from Min-hyuk. The ticking clock. Perfect scene, A+, it will never leave my heart.

[jellostrikesback]

I would love to see a Band of Brothers-esque Clone Wars show. Cut the PG/for-kids animation without bloodshed stuff, go hard on the War is Hell angle. Follow the 501st as they lose men and gain shinies, learn that War is Other People but Peace is Each Other

The documentary-style bits are all Temuera Morrison in different shirts.

[heartshapedgoggles]

On a scale of "Arson" to "Set Me Free Pt.2", how do you think the members feel about leaving BTS?

[superiorjello]

I just want you to know

from the deepest part of my heart

That this is EXACTLY what I'll be saying

and I am absolutely CHUFFED that I have the opportunity

Random Animal Generator - Perchance

[lunarw0rks]

wait wait lemme cook, firefighter!soap & baker!reader…because y/n will never be boring!!

there was a fire at the bakery, you’re pretty sure the owner burned it down for insure and you got caught in the middle of it.

johnny has saved dozens of people before but has the urge to visit you at the hospital everyday and he doesn’t know why (we all know why).

after you’re healed, you start swinging by every so often to deliver fresh donuts to him and his team and they all start teasing him, saying stuff like, “there goes your girl, johnny”

imagine firefighter!soap visiting you in the hospital and being so sweet :(( and not accepting praise for how he literally pulled you from the flames.

you're not seriously injured, aside from some scrapes, bruises, and a few fractures. if soap hadn't been so quick on his feet, he wouldn't have spotted you before the burning bakery collapsed. it was the definition of a close call.

and then, you let it slip that you believe the fire was all a scam. the owner has always been greedy, not allowing you tips, cutting corners, etc. and soap knows that his captain has already voiced the same suspicions to the arson investigators — so it's not an empty lie.

you shouldn't be moving much at all, let alone having him talk your ear off — so he dismisses himself, insisting that you get some sleep, that he'll see visit you sometime soon, etc.

...

immediately goes to the hospital room next door, where the shitty owner of the bakery is. slightly mangled by flames, barely conscious from whatever drugs they're pumping through him.

firefighter!soap leaning over the owner, gripping his jaw and whispering the vilest threats in his ear so none of the nurses/visitors can hear.

how you could've died because of your boss' scam, and it has johnny SEETHING !!! probably more than he should be, considering it's his job to save, not to get involved. soap thinking 'should've let the bastard burn' as he speeds down the hall.

and he's probably not even supposed to be visiting you.

but he'll be back tomorrow. with a card and flowers as if he wasn't on the brink of committing a felony for you.

[aueua]

It sounds like two years of noise music. (it's just missing a slide whistle.)

LINES, COLORS, SHADING: @racc0jello (the coolest!!)

SKETCH, FINAL: @aueua

[superiorjello]

I feel like with the chain of "fus" and then "fus ro" and finally "fus ro dah", it's more like a mouse running around going "fuck! fuck! fuck off! fuck off bitch!"

But maybe that's just me

The premise of Skyrim is just so funny. The shouts are just dragon language, making the fights between dragons basically an argument? But now this puny human has a minimal grasp of the vocab. Imagine you're disagreeing with your bud about something unimportant like pineapple on pizza and then a mouse came running over and called you a bitch

[superiorjello]

So a friend and I were talking about how awful bigots are and, well...

[aceofthyme]

this is something that has been in my mind for a hot second so I’m sharing it with the class but

I feel like Doc Brown would not like jello

Maybe this is just me projecting? But like. I feel like he’d play with it, maybe, but not eat it. I would love to hear people’s opinions on this, please, let me know if you agree or not

[heartshapedgoggles]

Which Kpop Bands HP Characters Would Stan

Okay yes, I know Rowling sucks and Harry Potter is anathema now but like, it was a large part of my fandom experience for years so it's already in my brain and then I saw a tiktok talking about this but the person had different opinions than me and I wanted to not throw my weird headcanons all over their post so I'm making my own. But like, Trans Lives Matter, don't give JKR any more money, etc.

Anyways

I'm going to move forward pretending that kpop is like quidditch in the hp world: pretty much everyone has an opinion on it, and have grown up forming those opinions over time. All present day (2023) bands exist, but I'm a kpop old so I'm definitely going to skew that way a little.

Harry: Probably a BTS stan. He was thrown into this world with no knowledge and very little time to deep-dive, so he just kind of listens to the popular stuff that's around, and BTS is pretty much everywhere. When they start seeming tired before their hiatus he understands it on a deeply personal level. Jungkook bias, the image of a golden boy who has to be good at everything speaks to him. Later he discovers Xdinary Heroes and finds their song Happy Death Day hilarious post-battle of Hogwarts and so starts stanning them.

Ron: H.O.T. for the longest time, because they were an older group and the merch was cheap, and then later Forestella, because they're kind of niche and weird and don't have a big following. This is the man who supports the Chudley Cannons. He also likes BlackPink, but is embarassed about it and could never afford one of their concerts anyway, so he's more of a fan than a stan.

Hermione: This girl did research. She went looking for the most technically perfect artists, and landed on EXO and IU first, but then later (post year 3) found both Mamamoo and Brown Eyed Girls and was charmed by the vocals and the sass. When Harry learns how bookish RM from BTS is, he tells Hermione and she starts stanning him specifically as well.

Draco: Outwardly a Big Bang stan, he secretly also loves both Twice and his mother's old Shinhwa records. He has told no one.

Fred & George: They love the chaos pipeline of Block B, 2NE1, and Psy, and have recently added Xikers to their collection.

Ginny: She stans BlackPink and ITZY for their girl power vibes, and is a fan of 2NE1, which she listens to with Fred and George. In public she plays into her love of Stray Kids, because she hates being seen as girly.

Luna: Orange Caramel, Crayon Pop, Gugudan, and Dreamcatcher. Fun, weird, and occasionally dark.

Neville: BTOB and NCT Dream, but also GFriend because of that one Me Gustas Tu performance.

Sirius: Listened to actual JYP back in the day because all his family hated the guy for looking weird. Now JYP is The Man though, so Sirius sticks it to him by listening to Got7 after they broke away from JYP Entertainment. He also likes Ateez for the way they break norms by using such serious (eeeyyyyy) faces when they perform.

Lavender Brown: is a huge Sistar stan and had a screaming argument with Hermione about how exploitative songs like Shake It and Touch My Body are, where she actually made some great points about how pretty much /every/ kpop group uses exploitative marketing in some way, Sistar just don't dress it up as anything but. Ron agreed with her and that really pissed off Hermione.

Hagrid: Listens to Monsta X purely because of the name

[superiorjello]

You stand there, staring at the amusement park in wonder. This was pretty much one of the last things you expected to see in hell, and you had thought about it a lot. Everyone always told you that you would end up here, after all.

You open up your mouth to say something glib, but another human quickly grabs you by the arm and drags you to the side.

"Don't tell them. Don't say anything," he hurriedly whispers. "The rollercoaster makes us scream, right? So they think it's torture. Just go with it."

You shrug, and go ride something that appears to be a taller version of Tower of Terror.

After a long day of riding rollercoasters and tilt-a-whirls and suchlike, you notice people filtering to one particular part of the park. You follow, and find a large pool labelled "The Boiling Pits of Hell!" with a scary looking sign. Watching the way people are acting, it is clearly a hot spring.

You pull someone aside.

"So, what's the protocol? Do we have to scream every once and a while to make them think we hate it?" you ask, getting a wry grin in return as they realize you must be new.

"Nah, they just think we've given up and accepted our fate. Just soak and have fun! Best part is, we can't overheat and die here, so just stay put until you're ready for the rides again. Oh, and if anyone nonhuman shows up, make sure they can handle extreme temperatures before they follow you in."

You nod your understanding, then follow them into the change rooms.

It turns out hell isn’t just for humans.. it’s for all species across the galaxy. Fortunately for you, it seems they have no idea how humans work, or what they find painful.

[startagainaprologue]

oh my god the need to watch an isat playthrough again is getting me so fucking bad

[moonshynecybin]

vale/marc/dovi

dovi and vale dont really fuck with each other AT ALL and not even really in a sexy way imo... like dovi has gone on record (in his book i think) basically saying vale kept a uh. deliberate distance that he didnt super enjoy and found a bit cold and impersonal. that plus the marc of it all points to ME that if they did have a threesome it would be entirely marc-focused and like. hilariously and cartoonishly insane and toxic. which can still be VERY hot and fun in a specific set of circumstances... like fr i think vale DOES generally try and exclude marc from his rivalry narratives (outside of recent podcasting experiences aldskjfhads) but if anyone ELSE is being hailed as a generational marc rival/person who can step to marc hes like hm. but that should be me though. and he goes insane. (like hes somewhat currently doing with pecco and marc!!!!! imo) which is ALSO very fun in the context of a threesome where theyre both trying to get marc off and dovi is being considerate and vale is like well i can simply make him come five times. rip to you though

[superiorjello]

Okay, so far as I can tell, the thing with Jingyi is that we literally have no idea what his home life is. He's a Lan cousin, that's all we know. He could 100% have happy, alive, loving parents somewhere and that's it. Which is fine! It's also possible that he's been orphaned by war or night hunting and hangs out with Sizhui all the time because he doesn't have a normal parental situation either. Who knows?

A lot of fic writers like to put Jingyi in line to inherit the clan because 1) it's funny and 2) we don't know enough about any other clan members so why not make it Jingyi. This then makes it relevant to place him under Xichen's care because he needs to learn about the sect from the sect leader. Does this kind of bullshit make sense in a normal, random universe like our own? No! But in a world where all the main players are somehow Jin Ling's uncle it seems much more likely. (this is a facetious quip, I am aware that several of the accusations of unclehood levied against characters in mdzs/cql are hyperbolic or based on flawed understandings of familial connection in Chinese culture)

ANYWAYS then we get to Jiang Cheng. Him being put into a parental-ish relationship with Jingyi through a connection to Xichen is hilarious BECAUSE of the way Jingyi barks at him like an angry puppy. Kid keeps giving you shit and one day you finally snap back at them and then it turns out he's your crush's kid? That's fanfic catnip. Add in that the kid's sass reminds you of Wei Wuxian and you have complicated feelings about that and now you're forced to confront some of those feelings? Beauty.

Xicheng only really makes sense to me post-canon without extensive AU stuff going on. But like, after jiggy does his thing and nhs uses Xichen to kill him and all that, the man is Not Okay. Jwy spent a good decade Not Okay after his sister and brother both died and he was left behind, widely known as the killer of said brother even when he did not and he definitely has fucked-up feelings about that. Like, he can relate to Xichen in a way they never had before. Also, Xichen was friends with nmj, anyone who thinks he couldn't handle the angry grape man is just wrong.

The argument that "they've never met in canon, so they make no sense" I don't think holds weight here because it's about foils; story-mirrors and similarities between circumstance paired with opposite personality traits that could end up balancing out those characters in a well-written character exploration.

like i don’t understand xi//cheng to begin with but conceptually i think it’s even funnier when ppl are like “and jingyi is their son!! 🥹” as if jingyi is not canonically ragging on jc at every single opportunity presented to him (and then some)

like this is their dynamic

[gelarshiesprofruitboarder]

the difference between the first and second bill and ted movies is so funny like. the first ones just like "oh they have to time travel to do their history report! isnt that wacky" and then the second ones like "youre in the future. here they are. theyre evil robots?? now theyre dead. hell is real. gods there for a bit??? also theres aliens. now theyre fighting and theres 6 of them. this guy wants to take over the world oh nevermind hes gone now. now theyre old and have kids i guess. world peace has been achieved through a single mideast(?) usa wyld stallyns tour. death is here too hi death." like what