#izuku’s self worth is depressing

[insatiable-insanity]

I hate how Izuku thinks just because he doesn’t have a quirk, he’s useless. You could literally just use support items to replicate most people’s quirks. Wanna have eyes like Mei’s? Use goggles. Wanna be a pikachu like Kaminari? Use a taser. In fact, a taser is probably better anyways since it can actually aim. (No offense to Denki, I love him sm and he gets better 🥺🫶🏻) Want explosions like Bakugo? Make them. Dynamite (which is literally made of Nitroglyerin just like a certain someone’s sweat) literally exists. 🧨

Literally almost every quirk is replicable.

Use spring shoes to hop like Mirko. Use a jet pack to fly similar to Hawks. Jet shoes to bounce like Gran Torino. Use gas bombs to knock people out like Midnight. Use water guns full of acid to be like Mina.

To be honest, it’s only the more nature inclined quirks (Inasa Yoarashi, Shouto/Enji/Touya Todoroki, Yo Shindo, etc..) that’ll be harder to replicate. And even then I’m sure there’s a way to get close to something similar.

And the good thing is if you use support equipment this way, you can have multiple. Meanwhile everyone else is focusing solely on their quirk to the detriment of everything else, which isn’t very well-rounded.

Izuku is so smart. And he’s always adamant about how a quirk doesn’t define you. There aren’t villainous or heroic quirks, he says. (Though this may be me thinking of fanfic, I’m fairly certain he says something along these lines to Eri. 💀) Then why doesn’t he practice what he preaches?? I understand he’s literally been conditioned to see himself as useless because of those around him, but god. It’s just so sad to watch, honestly. He needs to watch some Iron Man pronto.

Takeaway; Izuku would be just as good a hero with support items instead of a flashy, dangerous quirk (no offense to OFA but it literally kills its users 💀🪦🙏🏻) and he really needs some therapy asap. He has zero sense of self-worth. 😃

[mjbunnyluv]

You’re not nothing

Katsuki leaned against the kitchen counter and sighed. A warm mug of tea was cupped between his hands as he watched his boyfriend. Izuku had been in the same spot for hours, sitting cross-legged staring out their large living room window. 

Patrol had been rough today. Katsuki would have known from the non-verbal signs, but it was the constantly running news coverage of the disaster that really hit home what Izuku was obsessing over.

Of course that idiot would think it was all his fault. But what was he supposed to do? Deku had a lot of quirks, but he was not able to be in multiple places at once. He was fast…but not that fast.

Other heroes had been on the scene, too. But like usual, Deku tried to do everything himself. To be the one who shouldered the worst of the damage. Take on the villain and save all the civilians. 

Katsuki inhaled deeply and scrunched his brow at the first sign of Izuku’s shoulders shaking. Hadn’t he learned anything over the years?

The mug was placed on the counter, ready to be forgotten and turn cold. The blonde padded over and stood behind his boyfriend. The lights were dim, shining from the kitchen behind them. Katsuki’s shadow was cast over the smaller man, giving the impression of the blonde looming over him.

“Hey.”

Izuku’s shoulders continued to shake with silent sobs.

“Izuku,” Katsuki tried again, crouching this time. He hesitated to touch. Didn’t want to freak him out.

Soft sniffling was the only sound between them. Katsuki was sure he was going to have to pull his boyfriend out of whatever headspace he’d put himself in. But then, Izuku lifted his face.

Scarlet eyes caught the other man’s reflection in the darkened window. Puffy eyes, tear stained cheeks, lips twisted into a pain grimace and showing off his teeth as he sucked in air to sob again.

“I c-couldn’t save them,” Izuku choked. “I’m useless! Useless Deku. A failure of a hero. I’m n-nothing!��� His hands dug into his thighs, crooked fingers twisting the fabric of his shorts so hard they turned white.

Katsuki sat on the floor behind him, bracketing his shuddering form between his muscular thighs. He reached around and covered Izuku’s tight, shaking hands with his own. Gently, oh so gently, he pried those powerful fingers back, lacing them with his own.

“You’re not nothing,” Katsuki told him softly with a kiss to the back of his neck.

Izuku sobbed harder. “Y-You should have heard them. They h-hate me.”

“They don’t,” he argued. “They’re grieving. They’re angry, but not at you.”

“They should be,” Izuku whispered. “I’m supposed to be All Might’s successor…a hero who saves everyone with a smile on his face. And I failed.”

“You’re one man, Izuku,” Katsuki told him. “And you’re amazing.” He squeezed his boyfriend’s fingers between his own. “You’re so strong.” He lifted their connected hands to place a kiss on scarred knuckles. “Compassionate.” A kiss to a freckled cheek. “Kind to everyone.” A kiss to his other cheek. 

Tears continued to flow. Izuku shook his head. 

“I’ve never seen you give up. Not once. I admire you for that.” Katsuki lowered his forehead to his boyfriend’s shuddering shoulder and pressed a kiss there. “And so does everyone else. You may not have been able to save everyone, but you never once stopped trying.”

“I feel w-w-worthless,” Izuku gasped.

Katsuki sat up straight. “Look at me, Izuku.” Curls flopped as he shook his head. With a sigh, the blonde let go of one hand to grip wet, puffy cheeks and forcibly turn his boyfriend’s head.

Dull viridian eyes, glassy with flooding tears stared back at him.

“We are going to lose people, Izuku,” Katsuki spoke plainly, but softly. “It’s inevitable. And we’re going to lose friends.”

Izuku squeezed his eyes shut and choked on a wet breath.

“I’m not done,” Katsuki growled. “Look at me.”

His boyfriend complied, fluttering his eyelids open and looking at him with the most heartbreaking expression. 

“We’ve only been pros for two years. There’s a long road ahead of us filled with loss and disappointment. But there’s also so much hope and happiness.” Katsuki could feel his throat tightening, his scarlet eyes burning with forming tears. “But you have to promise me you will never stop trying. Because you are my hope, Izuku. You are my happiness. And without you, I am nothing.”

“Kacchan,” Izuku whispered, barely audible. “You’re not nothing.”

“And neither are you.” Katsuki told him earnestly. He squeezed those wet, freckled cheeks harder and leaned forward to kiss the corner of salty, swollen lips. “I love you.” Katsuki let out a shuddering sigh. “Now, please…love yourself.”

In an awkward twist of limbs, Izuku pulled Katsuki into a bone crushing hug. 

“I promise I’ll try,” he whispered.

Katsuki’s arms wrapped around him protectively. He squeezed his eyes shut, forcing his tears back and pressed a kiss against verdant curls.

[iamfrankie99]

Quirkless

by Femmie

253k 68ch

Summary: Katsuki loses his quirk to All For One when he gets kidnapped at the training camp and his life is a mess. On one hand, for the first time in his life he can feel emotions other than anger and stress now that his body isn’t fighting the nitroglycerin it produced, on the other hand, he has absolutely no clue how to deal with said emotions. How the tables have turned; is this karma for how he treated Izuku all their childhood?

Frankie’s comment: A looooot of angst, like, a shit ton for real. But also, Izuku is so supportive and the plot has so many twist that make you go daaaamn! Also? the starting idea in itself is interesting; I had never thought about the possibility of Katsuki’s quirk having such side effects but it does make a lot of sense and I’m all for realistic and logical fics, I love them when they make sense and this one makes a loooot of sense. It’s pretty long and somewhat repetitive especially in the last 20ish chapters but I’d say it’s worth it😍🧡💚

READ HERE

[vanishingstarrs]

loss of my life ( k. bakugo x reader, anxiety, depression, mourning, stages of grief, character death mentioned, some self deprecation OR your boyfriend laments the loss of his life and struggles through the reality of being the one left alive ) ( and what if i was feeling sad ) ( i’m actually so sorry omg xx ) ( play loml by taylor swift if u want this to hit extra hard </3 )

The sky was crying.

Katsuki Bakugo disliked nothing more than the rain, the whole concept of it made him feel extremely weak— useless. Not only did the heavy downpour make it harder for him to produce sweat and therefore harder to use his quirk, but being drenched made everything much slower and heavier, so cold and lifeless. He never understood what you liked about it so much.

Not until he was sitting on a bench, tears and rainwater blurring his vision, the two liquids blending together and making it hard to distinguish whether he was crying. He tilted his head back, letting the water pelt against his skin as he finally released his breath.

For a moment… it almost felt like the clouds were doing all the hard work for him, he didn’t even have to cry. A sudden crackle of thunder snapped against the sky, screaming so he didn’t have to, angry for him over life’s injustice.

He didn’t understand it. And then he did.

He could understand why you’d sit at the window for hours, staring out at the rain with a serene look in your eyes, your whole body at ease.

The text cursor blinked up at him mockingly as he remained frozen, looking at his phone, your contact pulled up. It was still favorited on his phone. He hit call after a few seconds, letting the other phone in his hands (one he paid for solely so he could keep doing this) go on and on, the special ringtone you’d picked out specifically so you’d know it was him calling played out. Over the speaker he heard it… your voice.

“Hey! It’s Y/N, I’m off saving the world right now so leave it at the beep and I’ll call back… or not ‘cause I hate phone calls… unless you’re my boyfriend… I’ll text ya! Okay bu— beeeeep.”

The recording cut off before you could fully say bye in that signature cute way that was simply so you, it was more of a buh-bye, with you dragging out the final vowel. If anyone else had said it that way he would’ve found it annoying, told them to speak normal. With you… well, he thought anything that you did endearing.

He wished he’d been strong enough to save you.

His finger twitched, and before he knew it his whole hand was shaking. He stared helplessly at it while his heart went haywire inside his chest.

Dying… he was definitely dying. He was dying and he would get to see you again—

“Kacchan?”

It was overwhelming. The tightening in his chest, the sense of nostalgia washing over him, the longing he felt for someone whose blood had run cold months ago.

A familiar voice broke him out of his reverie, Katsuki looked up to meet green eyes.

How he wished they were yours… he’d often get lost in the world behind your eyes, picturing where life would lead the both of you, together.

“What are you doing out here? You hate the rain.”

He was crying.

It was obvious to his childhood friend, even with the rain trying to disguise it. Izuku Midoriya knew him like the back of his hand, and he knew how much he was hurting with your loss.

“I know you don’t feel like celebrating right now, why don’t we go back inside?” Deku continued,“I’ll walk you to your room.”

He’d rather be in yours… a room now empty, it used to be filled with all your things— books, knickknacks, posters on the walls, photos you’d force him to take that he secretly loved being in because it meant you felt he was worth remembering for years to come… he used to love spending time in your dorm if not only for your scent, being enveloped in it made him feel warmer than he’d ever known before…

“She’s gone.” He finally spoke.

You really were gone. You weren’t coming back. You wouldn’t appear once more someday, jumping up from behind him to yell “sike” and laugh off just how good you’d gotten him. You’d never hold his arm again, or force your freezing cold hands under his shirt. Never text him from across the classroom how much you missed him despite having spent the whole morning in his room, getting ready and taking over his whole bed with your makeup. You wouldn’t whine about making the wrong shoe choice for the day and wait for him to begrudgingly let you jump on his back for him to carry you back to the dorms. He’d never hear your annoying laugh again, or stare at the little mole you had under your left eye. The days of flushing in embarrassment when you forced a bit of pda on him in the hallway before class were gone, and so were your secret moments behind closed doors. There was no more holding back, he was crying again.

He wouldn’t see you again.

Izuku gulped, frowning deeply,“I’m so sorry, Kacchan…”

He looked up, eyes somber.

You were the loss of Katsuki Bakugo’s life.

[softxsuki]

Hi, this ia kind of an emergency request because i had been feeling really suicidal lately and i thought that maybe reading some angst/confort would help ❤️‍🩹

Soo, i wanted to ask for Izuku in which his bestfriend had been feeling like super suicidal and she has been selfharming.

Thankss 🫶

Midoriya Comforts Sui*idal Reader

| Pairing: Midoriya x Gn!Reader (PLATONIC) | Genre: Comfort/Angst | Post-Type: Headcanons | Word Count: 470 |

Warning: mentions of suicidal thoughts, self-harm, depression

Note: Hope this helps :) <3 and for everyone reading this, urgent requests are now closed for the rest of April, I'll have three more spots open in May :D

Our gentle boy, Midoriya, is great at reading people

So when you begin to isolate yourself and plaster that fake smile on your face whenever you’re with your friends together, he knows something is up

But he’s a little awkward and doesn’t know how to bring it up without accidentally hurting your feelings or making you feel uncomfortable–that’s the last thing he’d ever want

So despite the anguish that hits his heart when you show up at his door with tears in your eyes, he’s relieved that you’re finally opening up to him

He was your best friend, someone you knew you could always rely on, and your favorite hero despite also being a hero as well, you wanted to put your trust in him

So you tell him everything; how you’ve been feeling recently, the self-harm, the thoughts of suicide that terrified you, yet sometimes felt like your only option

And he listened to every word, holding one of your hands as he traced small circles into your skin, encouraging you to continue speaking, not an ounce of judgment in his eyes as you pour your heart out

“Y/N, you’re my best friends, I wouldn’t be where I am today without your support. I’m thankful everyday that you’re alive by my side, I’m just sorry that I haven’t been giving you the same support to where you feel this way now. I’m sorry”

You quickly tell him that it isn’t his fault, he was a great friend who always helped you out and was there for you when you needed him, your problems were rooted deeper and would take longer to heal from

But with Midoriya by your side, you’d be able to get through anything now that he was aware of your situation

He’d show you that life was worth living one day at a time while offering to get you professional help as well, even if it was just having a professional to talk to about your feelings once a week so they could help guide you in the right direction

In the meantime though, he’d do whatever he could for you, showing you beautiful things in the world, making sure you wouldn’t hurt yourself again, and helping you be happy again, no matter how long it takes

“I’ll show you the little things in this world that you won’t want to miss, so stick around so you can see them all,” he says with a smile

Nothing changes with your friendship, he treats you the same, but perhaps is a little more aware and direct with making sure you’re doing okay and reaches out first if he suspects you’re not doing too well

Very attentive and kind as usual, wants the best for you so you can feel like yourself again without the dark cloud hanging over your head

Posted: 4/22/2024

[elina-bnhagirl4]

Not me starting my first post with my first husband. It's an example of my current writing.

Abbreviations here:

N/N: His nickname for you

Y/N L/N: Your official name

H/N: Your nickname for him

F/I: Favourite Ice Cream

F/B: Favourite Beverage

B/S: Body size (All of you are beautiful no matter what size you are, remember that 🥰)

Bold! Izuku Midoriya Boyfriend Headcannons

• He'd definitely pray to God that he got a girlfriend/boyfriend/Significant Other as youself.

"Oh heavens, I pray to thy self..."

You raised a brow at his kneeling figure, having head bowed to the ground, "Izuku, what're you doing?"

"Praying to whatever deity is out there who have blessed me"

"With what?" "You"

• He won't believe that he'd get a gorgeous/handsome/amazing partner like you. Even though, he knew you'd retaliate saying otherwise.

"Like, how did I get so lucky to have you? Maybe having a bad past was worth it after all"

You chuckled nervously feeling the stares around you due to his continuous rambles, "Izuku, sometimes your mentality makes me question myself"

• He'd everything in his power to make you happy such as weekly dates, late night calls and even skipping his plans if you'd ask him to.

"Izuku, are you sure you don't have any plans?"

He replied back sweetly as if he didn't had his one hand covering Denki's mouth to stop him from making fake kissing noises, "It's no worries, N/N. I didn't have anything to do all day"

• If you're in the same high school as him, he'll immediately introduce you to his friends and even invite in their sleepovers, parties or just in general.

"Hey guys, this is my partner Y/N L/N"

"Wow, you look so cute!"

"It is my pleasure to meet the significant other of our fellow friend"

"Hi"

• He'd tell you about his past after he got to know you a lot better. And I mean very very well. It's a very sensitive topic afterall.

"Izuku, are you sure you want to tell me about this now?"

He raised an eyebrow at your worried look, "Do you want to talk about yours?"

"No... I don't think it's the right time"

He shrugged and held you closer while continuing, "So, you know these guys, they made me..."

• He'd do his best to cheer you up when you're feeling down. He'd also immediately know when you are sad, depressed or in a bad mood.

"Hey, are you okay? Do you want to talk about it? Who made you sad? I just need a name. I think I have F/I and F/B in the mini fridge. Do you want them?"

He quiet down feeling your body slump on his. He held you close feeling your murmur, "I need peace and quiet"

He hugged back gently before laying on his bed comfortably, "Okay"

• Even though you warn him about not being self sacrificing, he exactly does that.

"H/N, I told you to not be so reckless everyday!"

"But N/N, this is the only way to improve myself to be the hero I aim to be"

"Izuku, getting admitted in the hospital three times a week is not in the quota of being a hero!"

• If someone both of you may or may not know implies to leave the other, you'd get defensive to prevent the other for being self conscious.

"Hey, cutie~ How about you and me ditch your plain boyfriend and spend quality time together"

The person began sweating feeling the invisible daggers digging in the body from your stare, "You got a lot of nerve to insult my boyfriend right in front of me. If you want your body intact, I suggest you leave right this second"

"Hey, handsome~ What do you even see in that B/S person, anyway? I bet I can make you feel much better"

She got a nasty glare with deep voice oozing in hatred, "One, get your chest away from me. Two, I dare insult my partner one more time and you won't have any less than 5 bones to be mend after I'm done with your B.S."

The girl flinched back before scurrying away without a glance.

• If he's sure, you're his one and only, he'd introduce you to his mother after the 3rd date.

"Mom! Look who I brought!"

"Sweety, is that you?!"

"Yes, Aunty Inko"

• He'd propose to you after 3 years of becoming officially together, which is 1 year after debuting as a Pro Hero. He's sure in his life that there is no one else for him other than the love of his life.

"Y/N L/N, will you make me the happiest hero in the world by being my Mrs. Midoriya?"

You stood speechless staring at his sheepish expression while he held a small box having the most beautiful emarald ring in it.

Your eyes watered and you nodded not finding any words in your brain right now, just the grin on his face and him putting the ring on your figure.

Ignoring the clapping sounds echoing around you, you knelt down and hugged him tightly while sobbing quietly.

He hugged back just as tightly while murmuring soft words of how gorgeous you look right now. He definitely knew he made the right decision by choosing for a life together with you.

(⁠つ⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)⁠つ⊂⁠(⁠・⁠﹏⁠・⁠⊂⁠) ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧

[wolfyaka]

Has anybody else been overanalyzing All Might's hallucinations? Because I have and I'd love to hear your thoughts on this:

All Might has literally said twice that they are hallucinations and that those are things he's telling himself, so either for some weird reason he just can't and won't accept these are actually Nana and Nighteye talking to him (which would be weird but it would explain how Nighteye knew that was the actual vision) or they are indeed representing his own mind, which is clearly divided. I'm not saying he's two different people, of course, All Might and Toshinori are one and the same, but he does have a complex and contrasting personality and he can oscillate, just like he shows different aspects of himself as All Might and Toshinori.

Either way, if that's the case, I believe Nana represents his heroic, self-sacrificing to a fault self, always pushing him to keep going no matter what, which we saw in the two fights with AFO actually, and which makes sense because that's what she represented as well; and then, there's Nighteye, which represents his humanity, his fragility and in the end, his inherent value as a human being, his right to live; which is beautiful considering Nighteye is probably the first person that actually cared for his life and worried enough to have an argument with him, mind you, I don't agree with the way he handled it, but his heart was in the right place and he did what he thought was the best.

Which leads me to All Might's mindset when acting. I believe in this whole arc after he retired, he struggled with those two sides:

At times understanding his life was worth protecting and wanting to do so. Pushing himself to believe he could change his destiny and thinking of ways to do so, that is, when he promised to live to Izuku's mom, when he told AFO he'd keep living, when he made the promise to bend his destiny with Izuku, when he talked to Aizawa and said he had decided to live, when he decided to ask Melisa for help, when he used his student's quirks as support, when he started streaming his battle and just being aware of people asking him to live.

But at times, there was also the feeling that his life made no sense without helping as a field hero, mourning how weak his human body was, falling into depression, still craving to hold on to his dream, to his heroic core, and in that, doubting that he'd be able to bend his own destiny because in the end, he'd go as far as it was needed, and that, ultimately, it was fine because that was the heroic thing to do.

I believe he went into the fight with AFO with both mindsets at the same time and that's why in his hallucination he jokes about the mentor being meant to die, just for himself to answer back that no, that's just for comics, heroes are human too.

Also, as a side note, I love that the way Izuku's and All Might's destinies changed, wasn't because they stopped being crazy heroic (which yeah probably don't do that in real life, but hey, they did risk their lives for a very huge, good reason), it was because they allowed other people in, to be inspired, to care, and to help and save them, be it with their wishes and will or directly like Eri in Izuku's case and Bakugo in All Might's case. It seems so beautifully poetic, just like someone else said with the wordplay of the Three Musketeers, they gave "One for all", and everyone gave them "All for one" back, which is what society needed to begin with; the fault wasn't in All Might carrying everything on his shoulders per se, it was that he felt the need to do so because a lot of people didn't care enough to move one finger, like we saw with Shigaraki.

By the way... this expression is everything I ever wanted T^T

[ace-touya]

I don’t know if anyone’s listened to the Enneagram album by Sleeping At Last, but I’m going to assign each song to an MHA character!

Izuku Midoriya

One is an optimistic song. For Izuku, I believe it highlights his beliefs that being a hero means to save others and contribute to making the world better, and the confidence he has in heroes to do that. This song also has a few lyrics that I think resonate with his arc in terms of being quirkless.

All Might

Two is a song that focuses on the narrators relationship with others rather than self-reflection like many of the other songs in enneagram. I think this highlights one of my favourite traits that All Might possesses - the fact that he’s in no way arrogant despite definitely coming across as someone who would be. The themes of this song also relate to the aspect of All Might’s character that puts others before himself far too often.

Katsuki Bakugo

Three is an anthem for burnt-out gifted kids. A major part of Katsuki’s character revolves around a fight to be the best, and this song delves into the moment of realisation that perfection isn’t necessary, and that the narrator has worth even with all their flaws

Shoto Todoroki

Four revolves around learning to find the good in the world and discovering yourself. Shoto has come a long way since season one of My Hero Academia, realising the things that he truly wants and who he wants to be, learning to forgive, and forming friendships with people who he feels safe around. In four, the narrator is still working through their feelings, but they’re beginning to love the life they lead.

Tomura Shigaraki

Five explores the thoughts of someone who needs to understand the world in order to not feel threatened by it. Tomura’s character, all throughout the series, has worked to reveal the holes in hero society. He hates it, and he wants rid of it, because he no longer wants to be hurt. The narrator of Five struggles with detachment and a fear of the chaotic world around them, feelings that I do see present in Tomura’s character. However, the narrator finds closure and belonging through human connection. And Tomura found that with the league.

Keigo Takami

Six speaks on struggling with negativity. Keigo is an overall optimistic character, but he’s been through horrific traumas and as a result, that positivity likely doesn’t come as easy to him as Izuku’s does. Keigo struggles, but he ultimately believes that the world is good. Five portrays a fight with depression, and the narrator is constantly fighting their own mind just to stay alive, yet they also want to be there for others. I think this is the kind of energy we’d get from Hawks if we saw what his day-to-day was like.

Eijiro Kirishima

Seven is a song about adventure. Kirishima is full of infectious positivity who, while maybe not the most confident in himself, is confident in his goals and morals. He wants to be manly, which to him means brave and compassionate. Seven’s narrator is always trying to move toward their goals, and deeply appreciates the world they live in and the people they’re surrounded by. Seven doesn’t seem, at first glance, to be as deep as the other songs in the album, but it is still just as introspective once you pay attention.

Touya Todoroki

Eight is about growing up too fast. When Touya became Dabi, he also became closed off and secretive. Eight’s narrator is angry, and scared of healing, and is finally putting themself and their pain on display in hopes that they’ll be understood. Dabi wants to be seen and heard and still craves the same thing he wanted as a child: validation from his father. The narrator feels like they aren’t the same person they were when they were young, and that they can’t go back to that version of themself, and has a deep sense of protectiveness over anything that they see themselves in. This is my favourite song on the album.

Himiko Toga

Nine is about the aftermath of being what others want instead of being yourself. Toga’s childhood was full of pretending to be ‘normal’ to appease her parents and fit in, leading to her desperation to be herself and do what she wants now, because she was never able to before. The narrator wants to start over, and what’s to be someone they like. They want to experience life for themselves, regardless of what other’s think of them. However, they still find their understanding of others just as important as their understanding of themself. This is my enneagram!

[comfortyart]

Forced Retirement AU- Prologue

As promised, I'm working on writing my AU! I'll continue to post arts and chapters here. I've decided to write the AU in a way that avoids direct manga spoilers, though the AU is inspired by a manga spoiler. Read at your own risk! Summary: After recovering from an accident, Katsuki learns to deal with the aftermath both physically and mentally. After spending his life assured of his future, he needs to find his place in the world when that's no longer possible. This is a BKDK fic, featuring an established relationship.

WARNINGS: Panic attacks, mental health talk, depression, self loathing. May have sexual themes in the future but will be marked accordingly. Teeth rotting fluff to balance it all out. I'll edit to post links to future parts here. Enjoy!

Ringing pierced his ears as he watched a muted mouth move as it spoke to him. The sound of his heart pounding silenced the world around him as his body began to panic. His breathing felt erratic as his throat threatened to collapse in on itself. He could see it in her eyes, the nurses’ speech pausing as she scrambled to his side as shock trembled his entire body. He remembered staring down at his hands, vision blurred, convinced he was going to die in the moment - because what was left worth living for? _________________________ Shrugging on his coat, Katsuki pushed aside the memory that prodded at his mind. He’d never forget that feeling of his blood running cold, losing the ability to hear. He wished he could forget. It’d be easier. He cursed under his breath as he felt his chest tighten. He wasn’t doing this, not today. He slid his hands down his coat slowly, smoothing the soft cotton. His suit was a stylish maroon, with a dark blue t-shirt underneath. It was a bit fancier than he’d prefer, but for the occasion he was willing to make an exception. He met his gaze in the glass reflection, scanning over himself. His throat tightened, eyes wrenching shut to wish away the negative emotions. Fuck, fuck, he could not do this today. “Kacchan?” Katsuki’s eyes snapped open to meet the bright, green ones in the reflection. Turning his body he met them directly, Izuku’s disquiet look making his stomach flip. The last thing he wanted was to ruin this day, ruin it with his stupid fucking thoughts. “I’m almost ready, sorry.” 

Katsuki managed to keep his tone flat, lips tightening into a line as he willed himself back to composure. Izuku returned a small smile, reaching to take the blond's hand firmly. He looked down at their hands, taking a deep breath as he squeezed, running his thumb over the changing textures of the scarred hands. Katsuki stiffened from a sudden contact to his face, looking up to meet pools of verdant green as a warm hand rested against his jaw. “You know I can tell when you’re lying,” he teased, tone soft. A warmth spread through Katsuki’s face as he averted his gaze, a frown pulling at his lips. Intimacy was hard - impossible, even - at the best of times. It’d taken years of consistency from Izuku to not perceive his own vulnerability as weakness, and still he tried his best to hide his weakness. 

Anything to not feel like a failure. “Pft, bullshit, I have the best poker face in the damn country,” he scoffed, giving a gentle smile as he met Izuku’s gaze once more, causing them both to chuckle warmly. The moment hung as the silence started to grow uncomfortable with each second. Katsuki’s pulse raised as he swallowed thickly. He hated this. What could he even say? “You know..” Izuku trailed, looking down at their hands. He dropped the one from Katsuki’s face to grab his other hand. “You don’t need to come,” he said plainly, attempting to hide what would be disappointment. Afterall, he wanted Katsuki by his side for everything and anything. Katsuki’s brow knit together as he scowled.  “Like hell I’m missing this,” he growled. “You’ve worked your fucking ass off for this! No way in hell I’m not going.” Izuku smiled warmly, squeezing Katsuki’s hands. “You mean, we’ve worked hard for this. I couldn’t have done it without you, Kacchan.” 

With a roll of his eyes Katsuki leaned down, roughly pulling Izuku against him as their lips met. It was firm, chest heaving slightly with a sigh as he released the tension building inside of him. Pulling away, Katsuki leaned his head against Deku’s. “Always so fuck’n modest,” he whispered. Untangling their hands he wrapped his arms around the other tightly, Izuku bringing a hand to his hair as the other rubbed down his back. Izuku listened as Katsuki swallowed thickly against his ear, a shaky breath leaving his lungs as Katsuki clung to the smaller man. “Listen,” he spoke carefully, praying his voice would not betray his last scrap of dignity. “I’m not gonna lie, this is hard. I want this for you, more than anything, but I still- fuck.”

Katsuki grit his teeth, a tear rolling down his cheek as he buried his face into Izuku’s neck. “Kacchan, it’s ok to feel this way, you don’t have to explain yourself,” Izuku reassured. “I can’t imagine what you’re feeling.” He ran a hand through Katsuki’s hair, pulling back to hold his head in his hands, smoothing bangs away from his eyes. “I love you, you know. Nothing will ever make you less of a hero to me.” With a scoff Katsuki smiled softly, moving one of Izuku’s hands from his face so he could rub tears from his eyes. “Fucking sop,” he teased. “Always gotta be the fucking hero, whether its a big bad villain or my fucked up self confidence issues.”

Izuku pouted. “Kacchan-” “Yeah yeah, I love you too, nerd,” he huffed, leaning down to kiss his forehead. “Sorry, just got in my own head.”

Izuku shook his head. “Hey, it’s alright. You know you don’t like asking for help, but I’m always happy to uh, rescue a damsel in distress. I mean, it’s sort of my job,” he teased, Katsuki feigning a frown, trying to hold back a laugh. He playfully pushed Izuku off him, crossing his arms. “Fuck you, I may not be a hero but I ain’t no damsel.” Izuku’s laughter filled the room, Katsuki feeling the warmth spread throughout his body as he watched tears prickle at the side of the other’s eyes. He’d felt this a few times in his life, the realization of why Izuku would someday be #1 - and this was one of those times. His panic attacks had been nothing new. His head often too loud, void of silence, but he’d learned to live with it. It was different with Izuku, though. There were never long, hollow hours after crying, no zombie-like days of feeling numb. There was light. In fact, the deeper the darkness grew, the more dazzling the light shined. And that light to him was Izuku. He was still picking himself back up every day, learning to exist in a world where his dream was a barred, closed off possibility. But with Izuku there it felt less bleak, less exhausting. He had a reason to keep fighting for a day where he felt adrenaline for life once more. Katsuki smiled, letting out a small huff as he watched Izuku regain his composure. “I swear to god, no one deserves that damn spot more than you.” Izuku met his eyes, the sincerity gleaming behind the statement left Izuku nearly on the brink of tears. “I’ll fucking kill them if they even think of putting you back in #2,” he growled. Izuku held back a smile. “Kacchan!” he chuckled. “What? Name one hero who worked fucking harder than you? I still think it’s unfair they didn’t place you there after all that All For One crap,” he scoffed. “Kacchan, you know they can’t just put a 16-year old under that much responsibility,” he laughed. “Does it look like I fucking care? That place is yours,” he smirked, shifting to place both hands on Izuku’s waist, and placing another soft kiss to his lips. Slow, intimate. A letter to the other for his gratefulness, for pulling him from his mind once more. “Let’s go get you that #1 spot.” Izuku smiled widely. Eyes determined, he nodded. 

[candlecoo]

since you are in the mood for hurt/comfort, can we see some of your ideas? i personally love me some hurt/comfort so if you have any it would be appreciated greatly:D

Life after Defeat au

- Chizue would often be found lost in a daze trying to remember her past or trying to connect strong emotions to reasons why she felt them. This mostly happened towards the first couple years after her accident, but occasionally pops up now and again.

- when it does she needs to be gently brought back into the present.

- Chizue is triggered by things every once and a while and doesn't exactly know the reason, like movies where a spouse dies or the separation of a mother and child. She doesn't handle them very well.

- she never truly remembers All Might or Torino. And even goes so far as to apologize that she can't which breaks their hearts that she feels the need to apologize.

Test my Limits au

- these kids have been treated as experiments or less than human for almost two years, they most likely have a hard time remembering life outside of the lab.

- or what it's like to not be abused so when they are rescued they are expecting to be mistreated. In Denki and Toru's perspective they misbehave and break rules cause if they think they're going to be hurt anyway there might as well be a reason.

- and Izuku is so scared of being hurt or being in pain in general he doesn't dare step a toe out of line.

- Izuku is also the only one who managed to escape the lab before the raid, he was gone for close to a week, and even outside the lab nobody would help him, they made the escuse that a hero would but nobody did. Or at least not in time to prevent him from being dragged back.

- Aizawa found him on the last day but was too late to save the boy and bore witness to his kidnapping.

- but because of the event Izuku has a hard time reaching out.

Change your Reality au

- so I've mentioned that Izuku doesn't take too well to waking up in the future very well.

- but between having to rely on others just to move around cause he's been in a two hundred years coma, the world being completely different, the self hatred because of his quirk and losing all his friends and family. Izuku starts out very angry.

- he probably lashes out, goes into depressive episodes or shuts down completely when he's at his worst, for the first year or so.

- he also tries pushing himself too hard in his recovery and only makes it harder on himself.

- what I'm trying to get at is he goes through quite a bit of therapy before he gets better.

Ghost Story au

- Izuku does not see the issue with hurting himself/killing himself if it means that he can help others by doing so.

- he out right avoids telling people he got a quirk even though it is all he's ever wanted because he knows that others would not let him use it if they knew about it.

- at first he avoids any help his Koichi and their group try to offer him cause he interprets as them trying to stop him from helping people instead of them actually caring about him cause nobody's ever cared about Izuku other than his mom. And she has too.

- Izuku struggles to see his own self worth and only thinks he matters when helping others.

[ao3feed-erasermic]

Room in your heart for affection

Use the related link post to read Room in your heart for affection on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/59995780 by rekicomeback33 Living in a quirkest society when you have what is deemed as a ‘villainous’ quirk isn’t an easy task, but yet it was one that Izuku had to endure ever since he visited that god-forsaken doctor. It was the day his life changed and took a turn for the worse. The day that society wrote ‘liar’ all over his self worth, and yeah it was true but it hurt like an open wound. His quirk was more like a curse; 'any lies he speaks will become the truth if the individual lacks good intentions towards him.' It hurt how often his quirk worked when he accidentally activated it. OR In an universe where Izuku did get a quirk, it still was not everything he dreamed it would be. Living in a world where anything he does would be deemed villainous was not a fun time, but actually a very traumatic time! He's really just trying to survive life at this point, who ever said he had to enjoy it? Words: 798, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence Categories: M/M Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Shinsou Hitoshi, Bakugou Katsuki, Class 1-A (My Hero Academia), Shigaraki Tomura | Shimura Tenko, Nedzu (My Hero Academia), Tsukauchi Naomasa, Midoriya Hisashi, Midoriya Inko Relationships: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku & Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead/Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Midoriya Izuku & Shinsou Hitoshi, Bakugou Katsuki & Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Inko & Midoriya Izuku, Class 1-A & Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku & Tsukauchi Naomasa, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Hisashi & Midoriya Izuku Additional Tags: Midoriya Izuku Has a Quirk, Midoriya Izuku Needs A Hug, Midoriya Izuku Does Not Have One for All Quirk, Homeless Midoriya Izuku, Parental Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead | Dadzawa, Protective Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Married Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead/Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Anxious Midoriya Izuku, Depressed Midoriya Izuku, Blood and Violence, Child Abuse, Kidnapping, Midoriya Izuku & Shinsou Hitoshi Friendship, Bakugou Katsuki Swears A Lot, Bakugou Katsuki is a Good Friend, Hurt Midoriya Izuku, the first few chapters are alot!, stay tuned for dadzawa tho, Midoriya Izuku Has Trust Issues, Midoriya Izuku Has Issues, midoriya izuku is partially deaf, Midoriya Izuku Uses Sign Language Use the related link post to read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/59995780

[ao3feed-hitoshi-shinsou]

One Day I Realized You were Too Good for Me

One day I realized you were too good for me by Sariana May

"I feel so, so useless and I'm sick of it! I feel so guilty every single time I can't do shit. I make all these messes that you always fix. Without complaint! Honestly I doubt I've ever seen you express a complaint ever!" He roughly wipes at his face. "It really really sucks being me and you just make it worse. You do so much stuff for me and I do nothing for you back." "That isn't true." Hitoshi cuts in Izuku swivels his head around "Oh really? Name one instance, where I wasn't freaking defective!" "You don't need to do anything for me." "So it's zero." He says blankly "You didn't let me finish." “You don't have to do anything now because you've done so much for me before and I'm just returning the favor.” Izuku's eyes bore into Hitoshi's “Still useless.”

Words: 4340, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Shinsou Hitoshi

Relationships: Midoriya Izuku/Shinsou Hitoshi

Additional Tags: Quirkless Midoriya Izuku, Quirkless Discrimination, Pro Hero Shinsou Hitoshi, General Education Department Midoriya Izuku, Aged-Up Character(s), Quirkless People with Extra Toe Joints Wear Custom Sneakers | Red Shoe Theory, Dead Midoriya Inko, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst, Fluff, i think, Miscommunication, Self-Worth Issues, Insecurity, Depressed Midoriya Izuku, Crying, loads of crying, like the amount of time I wrote 'tears'

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45401554

[ao3feed-drstrange]

Hero

by XSnow_RyuX In a society that has forgotten pre-quirk heroes and where alternative forms of power, such as magic, are banned, Zack Barnes hides his powerful and rare chaos magic while battling his own demons. Trying to live a normal life between excesses and self-destruction, he comes across an assassin who mentions the Darkhold, a cursed grimoire that could destroy humanity. After intervening, he is offered to join the UA hero course. Although he hesitates, he accepts, driven by the desire to find death after finding the grimoire, but maybe, just maybe... he will find a purpose in this life, that makes him think that being alive may be worth it a little. Words: 7043, Chapters: 2/?, Language: English Series: Part 2 of Rising of Leyends Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Categories: M/M, Multi Characters: Bakugou Katsuki, Original Male Character(s), Original Characters, Midoriya Izuku, Todoroki Shouto, Wanda Maximoff, James "Bucky" Barnes, Bucky Barnes's Family Members, Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Sensei | All For One, Yaoyorozu Momo, Stephen Strange, Steve Rogers, Shigaraki Tomura | Shimura Tenko, Tony Stark, Thor (Marvel), Loki (Marvel), Dabi | Todoroki Touya, Iida Tenya, Isaac "Zack" Foster, Ashido Mina, Kaminari Denki, Kirishima Eijirou, Uraraka Ochako, Sero Hanta Relationships: Bakugou Katsuki/Original Character(s), Bakugou Katsuki/Original Male Character(s) Additional Tags: Minor Character Death, Crossover, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Violence, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Gay Sex, Smut, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Angst, Fluff, Humor, Drugs, Drug Addiction, Self-Harm, Magic, Wakanda (Marvel), Asgard (Marvel), Romantic Soulmates, Soulmates, Trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Childhood Trauma, Depression, Gay, Party, Action/Adventure, Illegal Activities, Class 1-A as Family (My Hero Academia), Mental Health Issues, The Darkhold (Marvel), Reincarnation via https://ift.tt/4rhzADo

[delku]

i think in an epilogue scenario wherein izuku survives mentally intact, he would probably vacillate between embracing the affection of his friends and isolating himself, struggling with depressive thoughts. maybe he finds a partner, but he's so goal-oriented and has such low self-esteem that he may not see the value in that; that he might be more trouble than he's worth to a potential partner as he may believe he is for his friends.

i imagine he ends up having support gear developed so that he can continue training to become a hero. he already is one, anyhow, and administration would be foolish to deny him his want when he pretty singlehandedly put a stop to the campaign of one of the two most dangerous men in the world. it would be poor optics; a stark display of ableism as of yet unheard of in its audacity. "boy saves world, can't be a hero." lol. (sarcasm)

i'm not going to speculate too much on the future of heroics here, particularly as a larger political entity. deku's desire is to work as a public servant first and foremost. as an adult, he will grow into and become better at the skill of talking down "villains" by understanding their motives and addressing them instead of giving them a lecture (hopefully. if horikoshi was a good writer deku would do this). his rescues will become seamless. he will pursue public works projects and other acts of public service.

i'd mentioned before that deku destroying ofa to get at shigaraki is going to leave a lasting mark on him, even if he doesn't realize it yet. and that's true; the mental scar is heavy, but i want to talk about him losing the physical power a bit too.

danger sense was something he relied on heavily. he used it to dodge attacks and sniff out danger. it was one of the tools at the forefront of his work while he had it, and its usefulness can't be understated (though it can be undermined (toga vs deku) and taken advantage of (deku vs shigaraki)). this one will take some adjustment for him to acknowledge danger again, without any indicators.

blackwhip was like extra, extendable limbs for him, and he used it about as much as he could've (when the writers had it in mind. yes i'm still bitter about the flect fight). there were times when he had it active 24/7, more or less. it might not have as many direct safety implications as losing danger sense did, but it'd still be a lifestyle adjustment to reach out for something expecting your extendo-hand to grab it only for nothing to happen.

base ofa was something he managed to learn how to use pretty seamlessly towards the end, and it's the only part of ofa whose fate is a question. losing that extra resilience wouldn't be easy, though.

most of the other quirks contained in ofa were relatively minor or things he didn't have for long enough to get used to them (noteworthy exception may be float, but it's probably pretty irrelevant/redundant since he could already perform some fairly dangerous acrobatics without it). still, losing an ability you had previously can be painful, and deku made the decision to lose all of ofa to lower shigaraki's shields. he won't regret doing it, but he might regret not having powers. it was a taste of a life never meant to be his; those powers truly were borrowed, in the end.

he'll look back on high school during those depressive days and wonder if that really was the best year of his life, even with all the villain attacks. that deeply internalized ableism within him that the story began with, "not all men are created equal," will haunt him unless he puts in work to overcome it. but he has very little in the way of community for that - all might is of a totally different generation, and melissa comes from a faraway place with a more placid upbringing. he could talk to aoyama... but then, aoyama still kept his quirk, didn't he? it would be difficult for them to see eye-to-eye on some things. there's no one in the world who truly relates to deku's experience. there's no one else who had his role, especially not in his generation.

isn't it lonely?

despite his hero work, despite his friends whom he loves dearly, despite the support of fans that he couldn't have anticipated but probably should've, he still falls into despair sometimes. and if there's one thing about deku, it's that he's steadfast. pulling him from his depressive stupor is difficult. it's work. the things he says, when approached by a concerned party, typically aren't wrong. but it's not something he should be harming himself and his relationships over. he doesn't get it, though. you could explain to him a thousand different ways that his suffering hurts the hearts of everyone in his life, and he would say, "well, maybe it's not such a good thing for me to be in your life in the first place, then; if all i'm good for is hurting the people i care about." he can be convinced, but it's only temporary. he's not self-harming (in the clinical sense) or threatening suicide, but he's unhealthy (and dealing with suicidal ideation, which he keeps to himself) during those periods.

there might be more to say on this subject but am sleepy so whatever

[ao3feed-izch]

Legacy Of Hope And Despair

by Revenant63

"I'm not the protagonist of a comic or anything. I'm just a shy quirkless guy who likes heroes. My lack of a quirk was my sentence to the worst treatment I could receive, shunned until I forgot how to smile, mocked until I forgot how receiving a compliment felt like. Beaten until my body almost stopped hurting completely. In short, I'm not even worth your time analyzing or even worth wasting your breath talking to. But...if, for argument's sake, you were to write a story with me in the lead role, it would certainly be...a tragedy" Izuku

Izuku Midoriya is a boy that for most of his life has been mocked, beaten and shunned by everyone around him. For only one reason, he is quirkless, and if that isn't already a sentence for a miserable life in this world, he has long desired to become a hero just like his idol, the number one hero, All Might. But, what if he miraculously managed to meet said number one hero and get more than a simple signature? What if that hero saw something special in him where everyone except for him mother saw nothing but a weak genetic failure? What if that hero gave him the chance he yearned for so long? A chance...a chance to show how bright the sparks of heroism inside his broken heart can burn.

Words: 5679, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/M, Multi

Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Class 1-A (My Hero Academia), Class 1-B (My Hero Academia), Pro Heroes (My Hero Academia), Yagi Toshinori | All Might

Relationships: Midoriya Izuku/Uraraka Ochako, Ashido Mina/Midoriya Izuku, Hagakure Tooru/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Yaoyorozu Momo, Jirou Kyouka/Midoriya Izuku, Asui Tsuyu/Midoriya Izuku, Kendou Itsuka/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Tokage Setsuna, Kodai Yui/Midoriya Izuku, Komori Kinoko/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Tsunotori Pony, Midoriya Izuku/Yanagi Reiko, Midoriya Izuku/Shiozaki Ibara, Fuwa Mawata/Midoriya Izuku, Hadou Nejire/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto, Hatsume Mei/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Toga Himiko, Kurose Anan | Thirteen/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Sirius, Awata Kaoruko | Bubble Girl/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Takeyama Yuu | Mount Lady, Kayama Nemuri | Midnight/Midoriya Izuku, Kamiji Moe | Burnin/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Usagiyama Rumi | Miruko, Midoriya Izuku/Sousaki Shino | Mandalay, Midoriya Izuku/Tsuchikawa Ryuuko | Pixie-bob, Midoriya Izuku/Shiretoko Tomoko | Ragdoll, Midoriya Izuku/Tatsuma Ryuuko | Ryuukyuu, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Rei, Ippan Josei | Fox Girl/Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Fuyumi, Midoriya Izuku/Melissa Shield, Midoriya Izuku/Utsushimi Camie, Midoriya Izuku/Tsutsumi Kaina | Lady Nagant

Additional Tags: Depressed Midoriya Izuku, Scarred Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku Has Chronic Pain, Midoriya Izuku Has Trust Issues, Midoriya Izuku Has Mental Health Issues, Midoriya Izuku is a Ray of Sunshine, Midoriya Izuku is a Good Person, Bakugou Katsuki Faces Consequences, Bakugou Katsuki Redemption, Character Development, Midoriya Izuku Has One for All Quirk, Protective Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Protective Class 1-A (My Hero Academia), Protective Class 1-B (My Hero Academia), Self-Destructive Midoriya Izuku, Protective Midoriya Izuku, Harems, Panic Attacks, Yagi Toshinori | All Might is a Good Teacher, Protective Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead

source: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49651189