#ive never drawn this man in my life
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gifti3 ¡ 1 year ago
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leave him in the attic fr
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cairafea ¡ 23 days ago
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they're matching costumes.
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moonlume ¡ 10 months ago
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I haven't drawn anything in so long but art block/burnout didn't stand a chance against the vampire brainworms!!!! anyway her name is Scarlett and her hobbies include nearly obliterating the party with wild magic and being Astarion's personal Capri Sun ✌ zoom + lines under readmore;
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thunderjackal ¡ 7 months ago
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drumbot brian nation i offer you this in these trying times (me i am drumbot brian nation.) Click for better quality! + alt version below the cut
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The name engraved upon its chest was read by the townsfolk as "MERLIN." None could know that time and rust had worn away what it originally read, which was "BRIAN."
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5iceroy ¡ 1 year ago
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"Charles sits cradled in the passenger seat and watches Sebastian’s hands on the steering wheel. You can see God's design, in a hand: the beauty and purpose of it."
Flesh of My Flesh — @boxboxlewis
@f1blrcreatorsfest wk2: paintings
movie poster mock-up based on a dope fic :]
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taravangians-storming-balls ¡ 2 years ago
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quick lirin crop top sketch for you @knightsgaydiant
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hheckkingart ¡ 2 years ago
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What I Want - a Freelance Husbands Comic
Page 1 (Cover) / Page 2
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densewentz ¡ 15 days ago
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The finishing acts of Dragon Age: The Veilguard got me just
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eorzeashan ¡ 1 year ago
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still thinking about how Eight doesn't want to run into other Echani in the wild because he's afraid they'll see right through him and know the kind of man he is at first glance (an honorless killer) and the knowledge that he no longer fits even in his own culture's society would be too harsh a blow to bear, but unbeknownst to him it'd probably just make him more attractive in their eyes lolol
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webbyflippydippy ¡ 1 year ago
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guess who found out you can export stuff on the sketchbook app, i've been screenshotting everything i make before this one.
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andromedasummer ¡ 1 year ago
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sitting in the library half watching a lecture half reading a magazine and a line of 5 yr olds in school uniforms came by and came to a stop as their teacher counted everyone and prepped to leave. immediately a group of them surrounded me and within 30 seconds a little boy tapped some paper on my head with printed colour in sheets and claimed he'd drawn them and i said he was very good artist. a little girl asked to play the flute for me and mimicked it with her hands while making noises and i told her she was very good, 3 more started oohing and aahing at the sewing pattern i was looking at in my magazine, one got excited that i pointed out how cool it was that she got so many books out and her friend sadly lamented that she didnt have a library card and couldnt get anything before i managed to corral them into following their teacher who was beginning to walk the kids towards the exit of the building
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meejijis ¡ 10 months ago
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Suddenly wanted to go look for my cringey comic I've made way back in 2010 when I was in my weeb phase so I went onto smackjeeves, hoping to find it, only to find out that apparently I'm a few years late learning that smackjeeves SHUT DOWN on December 2020........ That. Really sucks. A lot. What the fuck 😭😭😭
#txt#Luckily I managed to come across a reddit post that had an absolute mad man that preserved almost 80% of EVERYONE's comic onto#internet archive. I checked to see if my cringe comic made it and it did. IMFAOOO#I reread it and im fucking cackling. lord#Though aside from that Ive been reminiscing about the days when I used to use this website back when I was in like 3rd-5th grade.#I mostly read lots of shoujo mangas on there.#I remembered some of my absolute favorite comics being “123 step!” by AshlingDraws. There was also this comic that never got finished#but it had 9 year old me on a CHOKEHOLD. “And your name is...?” by haku10 / akumatenshi19. literally one of my favs aaaaaaaa#I also remembered when rosuuri (who also used to go by tsugumi09 / tsugumi09x) USED to made comics too. I still remembered she made 3 comic#One of them was titled acquaintance. I still remembered it being set in a highschool setting I believed. slice of life. there was bullying.#and romance. I think she finished it but it later deleted it. I also remembered another comic she made but i forgot the title but#it was about highschool students and angels I believe...(?) then there was her comic about Pinku and alice in wonderland. aaaaaaaa#Rosuuri ended up deleting all of her comics and left smackjeeves like somewhere in like 2016. Idk but she left somewhere during those years#then there was m syndrome written and drawn by nemurou. who also later sadly deactivated everywhere. literally one of my first favorite#artists and inspiration. Nemurou come backkkk. I miss her art a lot ;;;;;__;;#Those were mostly almost all of the comics I remembered from my smackjeeves days they ALL had me on a chokehold on 9-11 year old me#YOU HAVE TO IDEA#And if it werent for me being babysitted by my ex crush and his older sisters which the eldest one who used to draw anime and posted#onto her webcomic being titled love letter onto smackjeeves I would have never have this childhood experience. I prob wouldnt be where i am#with my art today either.#But yeah smackjeeves was a part of my childhood at some point. it truly is tragic theyre not here anymore. I am grateful to the person from#reddit that archived almost 80% of it though. But man. Truly an end of an era. Rip
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ramp-it-up ¡ 1 month ago
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Knock You Down: IV
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Photo credit to @thebluemage. Edit mine.
Summary: James Bucky Barnes is an avowed bachelor and one night stand artist. But when he meets you, he finds out that sometimes love comes around, and it knocks you down. Finally! Date Number Threeeeee!
This is a follow up to Part III
Word count: 3.5 K
Pairing: Art Dealer (mob boss) Bucky Barnes x Reader
A/N: This is the final part! (For now) I think that this is one that I will definitely write in answer to asks. I just love these two so so much! Thank all of you for rocking with me on this one. This was in part inspired by Seb Stan's latest pics and this press run 🫠, and partially inspired by an old song by some problematic people, lol. This is the result. As usual, I am Basil Exposition, so this is broken into parts.
Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI. Read at your own risk. SMUT!!!! The end of the Slow burn, now it's burning very fast 😅. Cursing, flirting, jealousy, apologies, Bucky cooking (a warning!), kissing, dry humping, dirty talk in both English and Romanian, voice kink, oral sex (m and f receiving), protected sex (yay Bucky!) And these two are so fucking fluffy. I'm scared, y'all. I want it to be good enough for the build up.
I no longer have a taglist. Please follow @rampitupandread and turn on notifications to learn when I post! 😘
I Do NOT Consent to my work being reposted, translated or presented on any other blog or site other than by myself.
-----
As soon as he entered the Brownsville Arts and Culture Center, James Bucky Barnes was hot. Blood was rushing to his ears and he needed a drink. He wasn’t sick; his symptoms were all due to you.
The black dress that adorned your body contained all of his hopes and dreams, but you seemed to be flirting with another man, twirling for him and then giving him a hug. To add insult to injury, you had the nerve to laugh and smile with the punk. 
You in that black dress was everything in the world that Bucky could want, except maybe you out of that black dress. As his eyes traced down your form, he noticed the 5 inch red bottoms that you had on. Yes. You, out of that dress with just the red bottoms. That was what he needed in his life.
But first, he had to take care of that other man.
—-
“Benson’s work emphasizes the subjects’ spiritual essence over their physical appearance, don’t you think?”
You turned around at the sound of the deep baritone. 
“Well hello, Mr. Rogers. How are you today? Delivering an art analysis given to you by AI? Oh. I forgot. You are an ‘art dealer.’ An art dealer who goes to Soul Cycle in Brownsville all of a sudden?”
Steve clutched his heart.
“Ah. I’m hurt, Y/N. I thought we were cool. But I guess I deserved the air quotes.  I do actually love art. I took some art classes when I was a kid and I still love to sketch.”
“Hmmmph. Okay. I’ll give you that. But how is it that you popped up in my Soul Cycle class? Don’t play me, Steven.”
Steve raised his eyebrow at you and grinned. He understood why Buckiy was so drawn to you. Not only were you gorgeous, you were a spitfire. That was hot.
“I would never try to play you, Y/N. I also actually love Soul Cycle. Used to teach a class in Park Slope.”
“I guess you can’t judge a book by its cover, can you?”
Steve’s eyes slid over you appraisingly.
“Speaking of. You look very, very nice today.”
You twirled for him, feeling as safe as you would your brother.
“Nice. Okay, listen. I’m sorry about the other day. I was just trying to protect my friend. And you.”
Steve sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.
“I’ve never seen Bucky like this. He’s never been this smitten with someone before and let them into his life. But I get it now.”
Steve’s blue eyes were almost as beautiful as Bucky’s.
“Bucky is my family. Since we were kids. He’s always taken care of me. And I will do anything for him.”
He raised his eyebrow at you.
“I can see now that means that I will do anything for you, because I have a feeling that you’re gonna be around a lot. So do you forgive me?”
You considered Steve. He was not too different from his best friend, and you couldn’t hold a grudge. Not after Bucky laid it all out to you last night You opened your arms.
“Let’s hug it out.”
Steve chuckled and gathered you into his warm embrace. You pulled back and giggled, grinning at him.
“So what makes you think I’m gonna be hanging around?”
“Well, judging from the look on Bucky’s face, he’s serious about you.”
Steve nodded behind you, toward the door. You looked that way and saw James Bucky Barnes headed straight for you. 
And he didn’t look happy.
—--
“Good morning, Frumoasă. You look stunning today. The exhibit is amazing, the space looks great and it seems that the right people are in the building.”
Bucky came up and placed his hand on the small of your back as he spoke to you, ignoring Steve. His blue eyes were storm clouds at the moment, and his touch was electric.
“Thank you, James. You’re so observant, I appreciate that. And you look very handsome today.”
You looked him up and down and bit your lip, meeting his gaze and the way he kept eye contact as he inclined his head in response. 
Bucky was attractive as hell in his black on black shirt, blazer and slacks. You noticed that his collar was unbuttoned; the medallion hanging on his chest made you want to take it between your teeth. You stared at it for a moment, imagining such a scenario where that could happen and then met his eyes again, prompting desire to roll through you as Bucky licked his lips. He was right there with you.
You smiled at him in a way that you didn’t smile at Steve. Who was Steve Rogers, anyway? You could hardly remember meeting him as your mind went to the feel of being in Bucky Barnes’ arms.
You sensed an air of proprietariness as Bucky took your hand and kissed it, causing a shiver to run down your spine. Possessive Bucky Barnes felt like a sin you wanted to indulge in. You cleared your throat and looked at Steve, as if surprised to find him still standing there, watching the show.
“Well, I see some board members over there, I’m going to go do my job. Talk to you later, boys.”
You walked away and gave them a wink over your shoulder, and you caught both of them looking at your ass. You shook your head and chuckled as you went on your way.
“You trying to steal my girl?”
Everyone stopped when Steve laughed, his deep boom a distraction. Bucky still wasn’t amused.
“Oh. So you’re in love.”
“What?”
“You’ve never worried about me taking your leftovers or vice versa before. Hell, we’ve even shared–”
“Shut your fucking mouth.”
Bucky snapped at Steve who put his hands up.
“Whoa, there. Just yanking your chain, buddy; I know she’s special. I wouldn’t dream of making a move on her. Not that she knows I’m alive. When you walked up, I thought I was going to have to take off my jacket so you two could fuck on the floor.”
Bucky was barely listening to Steve as his eyes followed you around the room. One thing Steve said was echoing in his mind: “So you’re in love.”
—-
You floated through the rest of the day on a cloud. The exhibit was a smashing success with the 
Board of Directors in attendance. Securing Howard Benson’s penultimate work from Rebirth was the feather in your cap. 
And you had Bucky to thank for it.
Bucky’s visit was also a hit; he and Steve charmed the board members with the help of Sam and Nat, who arrived later. They all made amends for what occurred that week and you were left very impressed with James Barnes.
After a couple of hours at the event, Bucky came over to let you know he was leaving.
“I will see you later, Frumoasă. I have much to prepare for tonight. Nico will pick you up at 7:30.”
“See you soon, James.”
He kissed your hand again.
“See you soon, Y/N.”
—---
“It is actually insanely attractive how you handled yourself in the kitchen.”
You were seated with Bucky on his couch in his living room, looking over the New York skyline from his Brooklyn penthouse. The dessert had been delicious and the wine in your hand was spectacular. 
“I was sure you’d order something in and just play it off. But I watched you create a meal in front of me, and I should have known that if you said you were going to cook, that you would do just that.”
Bucky’s heart beat double time at what you were saying. He wanted so much for tonight, but most of all, he wanted it to flow naturally. He saw that you were relaxed and open to him, which pleased him immensely.
“I’ll take that as a compliment, Frumoasă. I enjoy cooking for my friends and family. Cooking for a beautiful woman is a treat.”
Bucky’s eyes slid over your form. You had changed to jeans and a color block sweater that just put your cleavage out there for the world, which was Bucky Barnes, to see. You also wore the same red bottoms from that day, and Bucky was beginning to think he had a foot fetish as you took them off at his entryway.
You took a sip of wine.
“How often do you do that? Cook for a woman?”
You barely hid your curiosity.
Bucky smiled and drained his glass, reaching over to refill it.
“Not as often as you’d think. Never had any other woman over here. Food is not usually the top priority with them.”
You pouted, which was so cute. Your spark of jealousy inspired Bucky.
“But I don’t want to talk about anyone else. Tonight is about me and you.”
Any uncertainty that arose was quelled by his assertion. You grew warm, so you finished your wine and rose to go to the window. 
“This is the most gorgeous view I’ve ever seen.”
“Absolutely agree.”
You looked behind you and Bucky was still sitting on the couch, hands spread out on the back of it, checking you out. You gave him one of your adorable smiles and he came to stand behind you, and took you in his arms. 
“I want you to know that you deserve everything, Y/N. To be cheered on and protected every day. And thoroughly ruined every night.”
You turned around and his hands went to your hips. It was the perfect moment.
“James?”
“Can I have a kiss?”
Bucky’s eyes dilated, and he moved his hand to your cheek. He licked his lips as he looked deep into your eyes.
“Ah, Frumoasă. I thought you’d never ask.”
His first movement was a subtle brush of your lips. He pulled back to assess the situation, and you didn’t know why, but that made your nipples tighten into stiff peaks. You gasped as Bucky watched you hungrily. 
The air seemed to change around you, and you shivered. He lowered his head so his lips could meet yours again, and this time his mouth was gentle but demanding. You gasped at the spike of electricity that flared between you and Bucky took the opportunity to dip his tongue into your mouth, scorching your lips and soul. With a low groan, he shifted your angle, bending you backward a little to kiss you deeper and ripping a moan from you as you melted against him. 
Good lord, could the man kiss. 
At that point, he was holding you up, one hand on your hip and one hand on the back of your head as you molded yourself against him. Bucky’s fingers dug into you, sure to leave bruises the next day. You relished the thought as you moaned into his mouth again, giving him the opportunity to continue destroying your soul. 
Bucky dragged his lips from yours reluctantly and stared at you, eyes almost black with desire. He brought his thumb up and wiped the moisture from your bottom lip. Motivated, you captured his digit, drawing it into the hot wetness of your mouth. He stared at you, mouth open, as you looked him straight in the eye and started sucking.
Bucky moaned as he pushed his thumb deeper into your mouth, and walked you back to the couch. He extracted his finger, watching the show your lips put on as he pulled it out, leaving them in a delectable pout. 
“More,” Bucky demanded as he crouched down and took your head in both hands as he kissed you again. 
His hands wound up in your hair, tugging gently, then on your back, then your ass as you arched your back to fill his palms. Bucky picked you up, then deposited you on his lap as he sat down on the couch, and you felt how aroused he was. His thick length was where you needed him most.
“Fuck! That feels good.”
Bucky was watching you grind on him like it was the best show on earth. Then he looked up at you.
“Yes, yes it does.”
He leaned forward and captured your bottom lip between his teeth, a preview of how rough he wanted to be with you. Then, he went in for another kiss. That continued for a good five minutes until he pulled away to stare at your swollen lips, and down to your cleavage, which was practically in his face.
When his eyes met yours, you were entranced.
“You good? You want this to happen?”
You nodded and took his hands in yours, guiding them up to your breasts, squeezing yourself with his hands. You rolled your hips, causing his breath to hitch in his throat.
“Like you said, James. More.”
You continued to grind on him, causing him to just gape at your body moving on his.
“I’ve dreamed of this so many times…”
“Yes? Tell me about your dreams, Baby.”
His hands moved to find your nipples through the lace of your bra and the wool of your sweater. He found them in no time, and pinched them lightly, then more roughly when you moaned.
“Mmmmnnnn. So fucking hot.”
Bucky kissed you again and then pulled away as he stared you down and tortured you. 
“I dream about marking you up,” he kissed your neck under your chin, “to your clavicle,” a kiss there, “and all over this beautiful flesh until I get to your nipples.” 
He looked at you for any signs of discomfort as he slipped his hands under your sweater to find the thin lace there. He found your hard peaks again and started rolling them both in his fingers.
“Then I want to kiss and suck them until you come in my arms.”
“Holy god, Jamie….”
Bucky’s eyes rolled at the second pet name you called him and continued.
“Wake up so fucking hard every morning since I met you. Then, I daydream about how wet and tight you will be after I made you cum, and how good it would feel to… to give you my cock. Do y’like that idea, Frumoasă?”
“Y-yesssss!”
“O să te fac să vii pe penisul meu iar și iar, Frumoasă.”
You almost came right then.
“D-don’t know what you said, but yes to whatever you just suggested.”
Bucky pulled you to him, and then chuckled into your ear.
“It means that I want to make you cum over and over again on my cock.”
You were already making a mess in your jeans, but you knew he could feel you soaking them at the moment.
“Please. Give it to me?”
Bucky groaned and kissed you again, this time encircling your waist in his grip and pressing you down on his bulge. 
“You know I can’t deny you anything. Are you certain?”
“Yes, James. Please…”
He lifted you easily, kissing you as he walked you down the hall to his bedroom, depositing you on his bed. 
“Y’look so fucking good.”
He crawled toward you on the bed and settled between your thighs as you hitched your leg over his. You pressed your core against his bulge and it had you muttering.
“Too many clothes.”
Bucky leaned up and you were fumbling with his button and he with yours. You looked up and laughed. 
“Maybe faster the other way.”
“Agreed.”
You two made quick work of your own garments, flinging them around the room between frenzied kisses. The way your eyes widened when Bucky got naked made his chest swell. He wanted you to always look at him like that.
“Wow…,” you said as your eyes roamed his physique.
His cock seemed massive as it slapped him on the abs.
“Wow, indeed,” replied Bucky as he took you in hungrily.
Your white lace underwear looked amazing against your skin and against your cunt it served to make him hungry.
He moved toward you again, kissing up your leg until he got to the edge of your panties and nudged his nose there, making you squirm.
“Smell so good, look so good…”
Bucky kissed at the edge of your underwear,
“I just know you’re gonna taste good too..”
He moved to the center of you, placing a kiss over your lace-covered sodden slit. Then, he looked up at you and smirked before he leaned down and licked you over your panties. 
“Fuck.”
He pulled your panties to the side and gazed at you there. 
Those blue eyes threatened to steal your soul as he gazed at you and confessed, “This is the most gorgeous pussy I’ve ever seen,” and proceeded to lick a rude stripe up the center of you after he tore your panties away.
“Oh my god, James.”
You rolled your hips again and reached down to feel Bucky’s soft hair. He pulled your hips closer and his lips suckled you with more pressure, adding one finger, then two to stretch you out. 
“Gotta get you ready for me, my love.” 
Your eyes rolled back into your head as you moaned through Bucky thrusting his tongue inside you, then pulling back to focus on your clit.
“I c-can’t.. I–”
“Give me my cum, Frumoasă!”
You locked eyes with him as he buried his face in your cunt and shook against him as you came embarrassingly fast, pulling on his messed up curls.
“So fucking delicious. Taste.”
He took your head in both hands and kissed you deeply, and you responded by sucking your essence off of his tongue. You reached down and started stroking his cock, overjoyed and a little bit scared that your fingers didn’t meet around him as he unclasped your bra.
Bucky whimpered as your thumb came up and stroked his sensitive head, spreading his precum over the wide, mushroom cap.
“You’re so fucking huge, Bucky…”
Bucky pulled you toward him as he reached into his bedside drawer for a condom and a bottle.
“And you’re so wet, Furmoasa. We will make this work. Believe me…”
You continued to stroke and watched him as he brought the wrapper to his teeth and him tearing it open was about the hottest act of sexual protection you’d ever seen. Somehow, your mouth ended up sucking his tip as you watched his eyes roll back into his skull.
“That beautiful mouth…”
Bucky put his hand on your head as you tasted him experimentally, wondering if you’d ever be able to take it all. He seemed to read your mind as he spoke next.
“Don’t worry, I plan on us having a lot of practice with this later, but if you don’t let me put this condom on, I’m gonna cum all over your face, Frumoasă…”
You looked up at him and grinned as his cock jumped in your mouth, but you finally pulled off of him with a pop.
“I need to feel you around me when I cum love. S’all I’ve been dreaming of all week.”
Now his chest was heaving as he rolled the condom on, and he pushed you back onto the bed as his hand went to your core once again. You were even wetter than before and Bucky smiled at you, lining up and kissing you on the forehead as he began to breach your folds.
When he slid inside, your fingernails curled into his shoulders and your eyes grew wide. Bucky stopped, concentrating while his cock pumped, barely inside you.
“There is nothing. In the world. Like being inside your soft, wet, cunt.”
“Fuckkkkk!” 
You became even wetter and he slid fully inside you. There, Bucky waited for you to get adjusted around him.
“So fucking tight. And hot. Just like I knew you would be.”
“More, Jamie!”
Smiling, Bucky started moving and you gripped him as he stroked in and out.
“Please don’t stop. Harder!”
Bucky grabbed the headboard and gave you what you wanted. His other hand pulled your hair and his strokes became more intense.
“Wanted to last longer, but I can’t, Baby. So beautiful. Pussy made for me. Cuming soon, but later… O să te fac să vii pe penisul meu iar și iar, Frumoasă. I never make a promise I can’t keep.”
You orgasm whited out your vision and your throat burned as you screamed. Bucky roared, filling the condom with copious amounts of cum. Your cunt was milking him and he hoped it would hold. He stayed sunk into you as long as he could before he had to get up and rid himself of the prophylactic.
He was only in the en suite for a few minutes as you floated in and out of sleep, lust drunk and exhausted.
Bucky climbed back into bed and got both of you situated under the covers, whispering in your ear.
“Stay tonight.”
“Of course. That was the plan, wasn’t it?”
Both of you chuckled, because you knew it was true. Bucky kissed your ear and waited for your breath to even out. When he thought you were asleep, he whispered again.
“I’m going to be a better man for you, Frumoasă.”
“You are exactly who you need to be, James Barnes. Just keep moving forward. Tomorrow is another day to do that.”
After a few more minutes, you spoke again.
“Tomorrow will only be a week that we’ve known each other. Imagine that.” 
Bucky buried his nose in your hair, inhaling your scent.
“Guess I better wait until tomorrow to ask you to marry me.”
You laughed a sleepy laugh.
“You got jokes.”
“You know me, Frumoasă. A professional comedian.”
But somewhere in the dark of Bucky Barnes’ closet, a diamond found some light and sparkled.
——
The next morning is here ;)
Please, please! Let me know!
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coriphallus ¡ 4 days ago
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DA: The Veilguard Spoiler review pt2 - The Grime
this is a hard one to tackle without strawmaning anyone because itll be a direct response to alot of defense ive seen for the games morality system so ill just start by saying, iykyk
never a genre has been better equipped to discuss ethics than the interactive medium of games and yes, bioware games have been doing it since baldurs gate and no, theyve not always been 'centrist' and 'conservative'. im not even gonna entertain that idea. do you remember the cultural landscape DA:O released to? the landscape it was developed in? dont give me that just because zevran doesnt write in his little notes -that you can conveniently read- 'gay good. not me but me bisexual'
Thedas is a flawed world and its a world thats just as desperate to hang on to its status quo as our own. every time you play an elf thats thriving, or a human thats queer, or a mage thats not institutionalised you exist in a world that doesnt want you, it is an act of defiance that you do.
im sure we can all see why these games were so popular with the audience they can only weakly try to pander to today.
derailing time again; so one of my favourite paintings of all time is saturn devouring his son. it makes me feel so uncomfortable that it gave me nightmares as a child, and i still cant look at it without feeling this knot in my throat. i hate it. i hate how it makes me feel, how that man looks at me in terror like its begging me for help while cannibalising another. weird story but i was bewitched by that painting as a little kid.
it is not a well drawn painting, the proportions are all over the place, brush strokes crude and inelegant. it doesnt even have a deeper story nor was it intended for an audience. i will never know what goya thought of when drawing it.
i thought alot about that painting later in my life when i was struggling with mental health problems, i thought about goya alot too as an adult and after learning about his life. i stared at his paintings and remembered when i told my dad that i hated [saturns] big eyes and hed jokingly said "it would be scarier if he didnt have eyes"
i know what the drawing looks like now, nearly everyone with a little access to the internet does. if somebody removed saturn from it, we'd still be left with a brutalised headless carcass of a man in a canvas too big for itself. if we removed that too all we'd be left with would be void.
i dont want to live in a world where all i know of goya is his rococo work, i dont want to stare at the painting of a void knowing what filled it before. i hated every second of germinale but i never wanted it to be anything other than itself, the story it tells could never hold credence otherwise.
DAV has done its best to paint over it, but its still on the old canvas and i cant look away from the negative space its left, i know whats under it and it unsettles me, infuriates me. it hands me a palette with baby blues and pinks and tells me to paint over it to make a prettier painting. didnt i hate the eyes? wasnt it gross before?
i am not going to write why we need some grime in art, but its absence is disheartening. and to those who say hanged people in the streets or blighted villagers is dark and mature ill say no. its a kids idea of maturity, its the aesthetic of it with no substance. it means nothing to me if rook can just drench themselves in gallons of blight as they crawl through it. the horror of blight has never been the black goo and slimy tentacles, or the monster woman with way too many tits. it is watching people you love slowly fade away, it is a woman who was forced to cannibalise the contaminated flesh of her friends because the woman she loved betrayed her, it was the sheer scale and inevitability of it.
one area we go to is overrun by it and the game begs me to feel hopeful that flowers are growing again when it never let me lose hope. people have already prevailed, they have roofs over their heads and a steady supply of food on their tables. their spirit is unwavering.
its bad, everybody says. the sky is grey and soil is blackened, as my rook turns some statues to access a haunted house whos inhabitants are long gone and the only story they could ever tell is gone with them.
if the question is do i want to see famine? plague? misery? abuse? assault? the answer is yes. yes. i want to see it all of the filth. i rather face the fucking monster head on with its big bulging eyes and misshapen limbs than stare at the abyss its absence leaves on the canvas.
and if nothing else, this bastardization is disrespectful to the people who gave the IP its fame.
Why choose to be good?
back in the bsn days ive wondered why, even in a fictional universe where your choices have no real-life repercussions what-so-ever, players had more 'good' playthroughts than 'bad'?
what happens when you start killing NPCs, when youre needlessly mean to them? the game actively closes off its own content. you get less out of the game. just as, completely incidentally, you'd get less out of your life if you just started killing everyone around you. The world would be emptier, youd be alone.
in that quote i stole from good place chidi doesnt ask "why be good?" the wording is painfully deliberate. doing good is always a choice, and often not the easy one. what makes the act matter is that you chose to do it, even when given 6 other options not to. did i stop in the middle of an important quest to help a man retrieve an heirloom from a darkspawn infested hut? did i hear what that heirloom meant to him?
i cant stop thinking about that speech ever since playing this game after knowing its predecessors.
So, why do it then? Why choose to be good, every day, if there is no guaranteed reward we can count on, now or in the afterlife? I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone.
i cant stop looking at this game that spits on its own legacy and think how could they have missed what fundamentally makes us human so bad, what makes us relate and empathise with eachother. what makes us pick the option to interact with an npc who openly hates what hawke is, and allow us to see the traumatised man underneath.
these characters of fiction are written by real people. i have absolutely nothing in common with a guy from canada yet for a brief moment in time i feel a sense of camaraderie as ive felt with goya that i couldnt articulate as a kid.
Nothing too terrible
DAV says it over and over again -as its wont to do with every piece of its flimsy morality- that people can change, people can be redeemed yet it shines as the game with most static characters in its franchise. it simply says things, and since it has nothing to show for it it makes sure to say it repeatedly, in case you missed it.
so when i first played DAO i was in high school, i started with a human noble because fresh out of dark side edgy kotor fame i wanted to be a posh brat. also because, ya kno, we were poor my entire life up until that point and i wanted to have power.
i committed to it, even as the game stripped cousland of everything he had, because i thought a man like him would. i picked the racist options, the sexist options, the options a man in couslands place would. halfway point of the game as i exhausted the initial dialogues something happened; this man who got paid to kill people, who showed no remorse nor care for his victims, begged my cousland to stil his blade.
and i did. i thought maybe he would be as confused as i was, maybe he had a moment of clarity but from thereon bit by bit he was less of an asshole. the characters grew around me, and my character grew around them. i chose to be good because -textually- we were in this together, at the end of all things.
rook is not a character, theyre a mascot. and quite frankly i think they may be a very evangelical mascot because they remind me of evangelical preachings of jesus more than the man from the bible (and i say this as someone whos only exposure to christianity has been through foreign media and the bible ive read that one time). they are the epitome of do no evil and their existence hinges on the frail concept of moral purity. theyre not a person trying to do good, who wants to be good, they are 'good'
-and lemme tell you its a wild choice to have someone like that locked in a prison of 'regret'-
rook can be mean to only one person in the game, and thats someone they dont even have a personal beef with for the most part. but even then they would be shouting at a wall because the game doesnt only undermine them with its narrative, but also every npc in the game suddenly gets possessed by the ghost of wattpad rejects past for a moment to tell them everyone can be redeemed. and i believe it because i played the other games, i believe it because i know zevran and sten and morrigan, isabela and thom and iron bull and dorian. i know it because i can see the vague shapes behind the new coat of paint but i am not rook.
so no, the game fails to get people-can-change points by its own merit, and it cannot gain points from its prequels because it destroyed them. none of those characters i watched grow exist in this universe. zevran cant exist with DAV crows, fenris` story cant exist in an imperium with invisible slaves only glimpsed through empty cages and broken chains left scattered on the ground. i dont know which morrigan this NPC is, is it the woman who grew to learn kindness, who begged to sleep with her friend just to save them despite knowing it would play into the plans of a destiny she so desperately tried to break free from? or is she the clever puppet her mother groomed her to be who wanted to harness the power of a god? i dont know her, i dont know this dorian or this isabela beyond their names ipso facto this is not a sequel.
bellara asks an assassin why he is trying to save the world and his answer is "ive done some things in the past im not too proud of. nothing too terrible, but some of it was bad." and i can hear the games desperation for me to not engage with its material in that 'nothing too terrible'
lucanis never killed anyone innocent, taash never harmed an animal they could shoo of or reason with, emmrich venerates the dead and is friends with every wisp he pulls to use in menial labour, davrin joined the wardens willingly because he wanted to do good...
rook tells harding that her anger is justified when shes not even allowed anger of her own.
nothing too terrible.
aside from creating boring and nonsensical and static characters it creates a dreadful echochamber that we're forced to sustain. No taash is not valid, their gender is but their behaviour is not and for the character to grow and mature it needs to be addressed. lucanis doesnt need to be pampered in shock blankets he needs to see how repressing his problems and jeopardising his health puts people around him in danger etc etc. they are adults and they need to learn more complex ways of healing. and if rooks flaw is that theyre an enabler, then that needs to be acknowledged by the narrative in some way too, and not mindlessly endorsed because they say some buzzwords.
none of these interpersonal relationships feels real because none of these people feel real beyond some draft of themes and tropes. some interactions literally remind me of two bots in facebook comments
i look at this dialogue wheel with familiar symbols and all im reminded of is hawke telling carver he carries every death with him, of him telling his uncle that he wasnt fast enough, of him begging the person he loves to tell him that his mothers death wasnt his fault.
and they dont. they just sit there with him.
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sofie-toffy ¡ 1 year ago
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Mizu Headcanons
AN: Broo ive just finished blue eye samurai and im obsessed w it..so here are some headcanons! SHE WAS SO FINE IN THE LAST SCENE BTW UGHH
(I’ll be separating it based on genre eg. angst or fluff)
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Warnings: Angst, Contains mentions of death & murder, spoilers! The fluff is x reader
(if you know me irl, no you don’t)
Angst:
- Mizu often thinks about how life would be if she chose to forgave her husband and didn’t kill him
- After Ringo leaving her she feels awful for what she’s done and wishes that she could let go of her revenge path but cannot
- Once Mizu’s “mother” betrayed her and Mizu killed her, she still had the motive of killing her father, but instead of the motive to avenge her mother it was to curse the man that made her live in the first place
- She understood that she never should’ve been born in the first place and was born as monstrous, hence her obsession with revenge. But there is obviously a part of her that wants to live a peaceful life
- She normally has panic attacks but no one has ever witnessed them except Swordfather
- When she was with her husband (the night before the sparring) that was the only time she felt loved for who she was
- She wanted to show who she really was as her husband asked to, and once she did she was called “a monster” and now she’s reluctant to show anyone even half of who she really is
- She overworks herself to the point of exhaustion and most times collapses, forgetting to eat and rest
- Whenever she checks her reflection, she imagines herself with brown/black eyes
- (Canon) she wears the same clothes she wore since she was a child and stitches them whenever they tear
- because of her binder she often has trouble breathing but she’s so used to it she thinks it’s normal
- She once wanted to gouge her eyes out so she won’t witness the looks of disgust when they see her eyes
- She’s entirely convinced that there’s no way she’ll ever be truly loveable. She’s convinced she’s monstrous in every way, from the hues of her blue eyes to the violence she bears
(MY POOR BABY I LOVE HER SM I JUST WANNA SEE HER HAPPY N SATISFIED 😭😭)
Fluff/Not angst(finally)
- Love language is quality time & acts of service
- Although she’s not aware of it, she has an unconscious fixation with music. Mizu has always been drawn to musical festivals and it both calms and excites her
- If given the time, she normally asks if you want to go to festivals (her unnamingly pleading for you to agree) and her face is relaxed the whole time, her fingers intertwined with yours
- I feel her normal dates with you would be very simple. She’d enjoy just spending time with you, quietly or with small chatter
- She loves stargazing with you. My god. Laying beside each other, feeling each others warmth contrary to the harsh snow as you look at the different constellations
- Actually, you’d be looking at the constellation while she looks at you with a small smile tugging at her lips, while she adores the light in your eyes as you gaze up
- Speaking of holding hands she LOVES to hold your hand, doesn’t matter if your hand is cold or warm, it intertwines with hers perfectly
- Whenever you compliment her eyes she doesn’t believe you until you say it a thousand times
- takes a LONG time to warm up to you, but once she does it is SO worth it
- unconsciously misses your warmth, once sleeping she searches for your hand to hold or for you to hug
- speaking of hugging, i think she can be both spoons but mostly big spoon
- loves resting her head on your chest but loves wrapping her arms around you, ensuring that you are safe
AN: GUYS I NEED HER SO BAD U DONT GET IT
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infecteddaydreamz ¡ 4 months ago
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i think they scatter like cockroaches when you turn the lights on in a dark room /aff
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coming up w funny captions is so hard guys what is this... anyway! more art of these fucking goobers that i cant seem to get enough of!
little explanation of the process thing / yap sesh below the cut smirks
i did the sketch on a 3 hour car ride coming back from the convention like 3 days ago and oh my god i hate drawing in cars !!! its not the sketching i so much mind, its moreso coloring, so thank god i did all the coloring and such at home!! but this piece took literally one million years but its done trust!! i have a lot of other *sketches* and doodles i could / should post from that trip! ill probably bring myself to actually posting more doodles and drawings and things bc i have tonsss especially of skwisgaar!! theyre literally all ive drawn for the past two weeks
anyway i just love to yap and man i just had the best midday sleep of my life! wake up and post ykwim mwahahahaha the grind never stops 😴😴😴
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