#ive had a long evening and tomorrow i'll have a long morning idk what im saying at this point im just tired
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I'm having one of those "I wish I could just be part of the Astral Express crew" moments
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gabapentinblues · 2 months ago
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12.29.2024 nightly journal entry. (for anyone who wants to read about my life) tw; sh and substances
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walked to seven eleven with my friend this morning and got coffee and a white monster and drank both right away so i really caffeinated and it felt nice. it was foggy and rainy outside but not that cold. wore the flannel i got with her yesterday at goodwill and the beanie i got for christmas. we dyed our hair yesterday and watched a horror movie, might watch another tonight. im trying to stay up later so im not sleeping so much and also wanting to have some more rituals and take better care of myself.
vi and i talked about me maybe getting a social worker but it seems really difficult for some reason. she tried to help me by looking things up before i left this morning which was sweet. she told me to mention it to my therapist so i probably will and maybe she can help me too.
i drove and hour back home n drank the rest of my monster and it was rainy, i called another friend bc she said her grandpa passed away suddenly yesterday but shes estranged from her family so she was feeling weird about the whole thing. i told her id come visit for the day.
stopped at home first and self harmed bc its just a habit at this point. i got blood on my clothes and didnt even care. i also cut on my forearm which i never do but i was just really craving that spot, i just dont like to bc its pretty visible and i dont have much space between my tattoos, but anyway it wasnt even that satisfying. i cut a lot and called my mom jbc i feel obligated to, we didnt really talk abt anything.
i still wanna tell her i just want to break my lease and move home bc i dont feel like i can do this anymore.
drove over to see my other friend and she made me more coffee, i visited w her and her cats. we're playing thru a video game together. i smoked a little even tho im trying to stop. tomorrow i'll try to go the whole day. we walked to target in the rain and i got some groceries i needed and discount press on nails
we made ramen w chili crisp which was really good. i talked about how i just still feel sad and fucked up about my break up and just depressed and lonely in general no matter what i do.
i texted another friend who im getting closer with happy birthday and she told me she cares about me and that she hopes i start feeling better soon. we've been texting back and forth today. i also heard from someone ive been talking with romantically on and off for a few months, im not expecting much there but maybe it will go somewhere. she wished me happy holidays and thats basically been it.
been avoiding the girl i kissed and had a nice date with at the start of december bc i dont trust myself to be able to maintain it and i just feel like she'll end up disappointed or just totally disinterested bc im uninteresting and unhappy so often. it just feels like another austin situation where she'll just get bored of me and i'll like her too much and be left behind.
got back to my apartment as it was getting dark without self harming again even though i really thought about it. avoiding all the dishes in my sink and avoided eating dinner. what i ate at my friends was fine. i had a breakfast and a lunch and the meds i needed to take. put on my cheap press ons, listening to music.
took a lot of gabapentin and i have a bad headache rn that i thought would go away but im just gonna ignore it. getting used to using this chromebook. i wouldnt have typed a post so long otherwise. maybe i'll do these every night, idk. ive missed typing on a keyboard. and knowing that my journal entries are going somewhere other than my notebooks is kinda nice
i guess its just another way to process things. maybe i'll work on writing styles and making it readable and engaging. for now its just stream of conciousness.
trying to drink enough water. gonna do my skincare. pick a movie to watch, and maybe set up a few more things on here before i go to sleep. maybe i'll read a little bit too. i want to start feeling better, i want to feel like im working towards something. im tired of everyday feeling like endless sameness.
anyway, goodnight
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thespidercorgi · 5 years ago
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Be careful out there kiddos
So bit of a long story but I think its funny. There's a scam going around. Ive seen it once but its its highly likely there are more. Basically a person asks you if you would like a sugar momma. Mine offered 300-500$ a week. I was obviously suspicious. But im very broke and still out of a job so I figured what the hell, couldnt hurt to look into it.
I started by going to the person's tumblr. It seemed super legit, like they even had resonable responses to reblogs. So either its a well put together scam, or it just a lonley ass person. I used a fake number to text the number they provided.
They said their name was Hannah Lenmont age 49 from San Francisco. They were suposedly devorced with no kids, and an investment analyst who just wanted someone to spoil and talk to, nothing sexual. I was like yeah sure okay. I gave my age and state i lived in plus some hobbies, normal stuff it was whatever. I've told more to strangers on discord tbh.
We got to talking and she was super sweet, called me sweet nicknames, told me about how she was going to spoil me how she wanted to take me traveling, it all seemed like a lot of work for a scam, but of ccourse i was still suspicious of the whole thing.
Here's where it gets fun. They asked what the nearest convenience store was. Odd request but okay. They knew i didnt have a car so they asked me to walk there and buy a steam gift card. And they would give me more to cover the cost when they paid me tonight (They called it an investment card at first idk) i was like I have 3 dollars to my name. I thought this was done, they'd realize I'm broke as shit and be done. Nope! They assured me they would just give me the money I needed to buy it. They would transfer it to my account and it'd be there tomorrow morning. I was like cool I'll buy it tomorrow then right?
I was a tad confused at this point, like it was obviously a scam, but what could they obtain from a paypal or routing number. Then the kicker.
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What does that even mean honestly, anyway this is how they wanted to "send" the money
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Ah I see, of course. So i drew this out as long as possible saying i couldn't set up the app because my phone was shitty, and the online banking didnt work either. I again suggested PayPal but just for the first payment. But apparently thier acount manager restricted 3rd party apps because thier last sugar bady stole 890$ via pay pal. I still wanted to scam them a little so i suggested a visa gift card.
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Now this wasnt the first time they'd mentioned Germany but i was far more suspicious now. I said i was willing to wait until they were back in the states to get them on a new topic so i could play my trap card. I asked if they wanted to see some art i made. I'm not sure if you know this but it's super easy get an ip adress and location of someone if you can get them to click a link. Does the link look sketchy as hell? Absolutely, but many people don't pay much attention to image links.
And then they clicked it. I was so damn excited man. Turns out Germany is in Lagos Nigeria, who knew?
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TL:DR: My tumblr sugar momma was actually a Nigerian prince, and it is so easy to get someone's ip adress.
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