#ive been trying to finish this motherfucking piece for two weeks now god

[climbing-starrs]

if you do, i'll swear never to lay a single finger on eiji.

umm ummm im normal about this scene

[crimes-and-gelato]

Only Half a Blue Sky (Chapter 7)

Pairing: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

A/N: 

[arrives one week late and still hungover]

Hello, lovelies! How are y'all? HAPPY NEW YEAR! OMG! It's 2019! And yes, I am late, as stated. All I can say is that I'm sorry. I wasn't really in a good place, and I kinda drifted off into a different place just to get everything off my mind. Thus, I am going to give a S/O to the manhwa that kept me company while on sabbatical:

Here U Are

!!! It's sexy and fluffy and just perfect yaoi. If you're still here, thank you for waiting. And this is it, the finale. You won't have to do any waiting anymore. So, I guess kudos to that? It was hard writing this last one, I had written and deleted a lot of scenes in the making. But I fervently hope that this is everything you've wanted. As promised it's a happy ending, because canon already hurts. As always, remaining mistakes is all mine. I've only read this ONCE after writing everything. Fun fact: I beta-ed it in Comic San. [gasps] Another thing, this contain a bit of violence, or like mentions of it really. This is long already and I am holding you back from your last chapter. So, once more, thank you for being here through the journey. And I hope you enjoy this last piece of the story.

**

**

‘The problem with most of us,’ he said, ‘is not the lack of love. It’s the inability to understand why anyone in their right mind would want us.’ -S.Z.

**

**

There’s none of that biting cold anymore. But the pain remains, although a little more bearable than it was before. Nonetheless, it is present. And heavens, it’s a chore to even open his eyes, but he managed to.

Tony’s not sure if he’s having some hallucinations, like what he had when he was in Afghanistan, but he likes this dream better than his current reality; even if, this dream is set in a hospital. God, he really hates hospitals, but he’ll take it over the room of torture with Mike.

And would you look at that, this hallucination is already going great by featuring both Pepper and Rhodey. Although Pepper seems to start crying when Tony acknowledged them both.

‘Oh god, Tony,’ Pepper cries.

‘Tones.’ That’s Rhodey, reaching out immediately to stop him from shifting upright on the bed. ‘Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe,’ his best friend whispers, Rhodey’s hand is warm against his bare shoulder. And this is getting so much better by the second with how real the touch feels like. ‘Try not to move so much because that’s bad for your healing ribs.’

‘You’re not allowed to have office leave longer than six days anymore,’ Pepper informs him, sitting down on the bed near Tony’s aching thigh. She takes his IV free hand and breaks into another soft sob. ‘Not if it gives you room to get kidnap. Again.’ She sniffs. ‘I can’t do this anymore, Tony. My heart can’t take it.’

Tony only looks at Pepper with a small smile, quite happy that his imagination can conjure Pepper perfectly. God, he’ll miss Pepper, too.

‘Do you want some water, Tones?’ That’s Rhodey again, he has removed his warm hand on Tony’s shoulder and he misses the contact already. He needs physical contact without it having to hurt. Not like Mike’s touches that promises pain.

He wants to tell Rhodey to come back, to stay. But his mouth is dry, his tongue is heavy. Things are starting to get hazy again,, he suspects it’s all due to the consistent pounding in his head. Jesus, why did the bad guys go for his head when it’s his bread and butter.

‘God, Tony,’ Pepper says. ‘You gave us a scare… I hope you know that you need to compensate for all the stress we all went through because of you.’

His precious Platypus has offered him a cup of water with a straw; he’s only realising now that he’s parched. Mike’s only given him water and bread once a day, which isn’t enough.

‘I can’t believe a simple I’m sorry doesn’t cut it nowadays, Miss Potts,’ he replies. His own voice sounds weak to his ears. His eyes feeling heavy again, but he fights against the pull of unconsciousness. He wants to stay here: in this moment. He doesn’t want to go back to reality where Mike awaits him with new ways to break him down.

‘It doesn’t, when I know how much you’re earning, Mr. Stark,’ Pepper retorts easily, tears slowly drying, and eyes free from more waterbreak.

‘And your billions wouldn’t even cut it either to compensate,’ Rhodey adds. ‘What you need to do is stay out of trouble. That’s how you’ll compensate. Stay out of trouble and be safe, starting now… and for the rest of your life, you idiot.’

Pepper nods in agreement.

‘No promises,’ he says and blinks thrice to thwart the pull of slumber because he wants to stay, and bask in Rhodey and Pepper’s worry and nagging. He doesn’t want to go back to the cold and pain and more torture. He doesn’t want to see Mike, or even the guy’s shadow.

‘Does something hurt?’ Pepper asks, hands hovering over Tony’s body like she’s trying to locate which part is aching.

‘I’ve already called Bruce.’ He hears Rhodey say more than he sees his best friend muttering it.

Tony fights hard against the mental and physical weariness that’s taking him away from his beautiful dream. He lets out a low whine of protest because his own body won’t listen to him when he tries to move himself awake.

‘Shhh…’ It’s Pepper’s calm voice, her soft hand cautiously caresses his bruised cheek.

‘It’s okay, Tony.’ That’s Steve’s voice. Steve is here. In his dream. But he can’t see him because his eyes won’t cooperate to open.

‘Please,’ he begs, facing where Steve’s voice is coming from.

‘You’re safe, sweetheart.’ Is the last thing Tony hears before the darkness takes him again.

**

**

Warm hands on his own is the first thing that welcomes him back into consciousness. It feels amazing. That and also, how he’s no longer hearing that annoying water droplet that has been his constant companion along with the cold and pain.

Slowly, Tony peels his eyes open and observes the room his in. It’s the same hospital room he had in one of his dream. Does it mean he’s dreaming again?

‘It’s nice to see you awake, Stark.’ It’s Bruce Wayne.

Wow. That’s unexpected. He can’t believe he has the ability to dream of Bruce.

Bruce gives him a small amused smile. ‘You’re not dreaming, Tony.’

And did he say that last bit aloud? So much for his usual non-existent brain-to-mouth filter.

‘How are you feeling?’ Bruce asks. ‘Do you need me to call your doctor? Or Dr. Banner, perhaps?’

Tony shakes his head. ‘I’m okay,’ he answers, which is half lie because everywhere in him still aches like a motherfucker but he doesn’t need a doctor. ‘Water, maybe?’

Bruce nods and releases Tony’s hand he’s been holding to fetch a cup. And Tony’s only realising that it’s Bruce hand that was keeping his warm. Now, it feels a little cold without Bruce’s touch.

‘Here.’ The other man offers him a cup with a straw and Tony drinks.

‘Am I really not dreaming?’ he asks when he finishes half the glass.

‘No.’

‘How are you?’ There’s a few healing marks on Bruce’s face, due to the same explosion that almost killed Tony — that almost killed them both.

‘I’ve had worse.’ Bruce puts the cup to the nearby table and reclaims his chair. Tony almost asked him if he could hold his hand again because somehow the room feels colder.

‘JARVIS, could you please bring the temperature up a little?’

‘Affirmative, sir,’ JARVIS replies. ‘And welcome back home.’

‘Thanks, J.’ He smiles at his AI. ‘Glad to be back.’ He then turns to Bruce. ‘I can’t say I’m not happy to see you’re here. But… why exactly are you here?’

‘Ms. Romanov let me in and said to watch over you while she goes and grab some coffee.’ Tony gives him a deadpan look. ‘That’s true. But actually…’ Bruce clears his throat and looks at everywhere but Tony’s inquiring eyes. ‘I came here to apologise.’

‘For what?’

Bruce squares his shoulder, like he’s preparing for battle. He’s brave, Tony will give him that. He looks Tony in the eyes as he says, ‘Your kidnapping. It was my fa—’

‘No, it wasn’t,’ Tony cuts off, giving the other a man a smile even when it still hurts his face to do it. ‘I’m an Avenger, and everything I do is a constant life hazard.’

‘But still—’

‘Please don’t,’ he remarks. ‘You helped a lot in this mission. The reason why we were able to avoid civilian casualty in Sokovia.’ Bruce still looks like he wants to argue. ‘And I also enjoyed building that Radioactive Gamma Energy Scanner prototype, even when it didn’t work.’

‘And this is why you need to stick with your other Bruce.’ Bruce chuckles, shaking his head in amusement. ‘Not our best two a.m. invention.’

Tony wants to tell him that they can still improve the prototype and make a successful Weird Energy Scanner for magical aliens or magical items. But the door suddenly opens, and burst in Steve and James.

‘JARVIS said that you’re awake,’ Steve says.

‘What is he doing here?’ James’ glaring at Bruce.

Both super soldiers are in their own strange image of tired and worry. Plus, displease on James’ side as he eyes Bruce.

‘I guess that’s my cue to leave,’ Bruce tells Tony. He’s rising up from his chair.

‘You should,’ James agrees frostily. ‘How did you even manage to get here?’ He crosses the room and postures terrifyingly on Tony’s other side. ‘After what you did in Sokovia.’

‘Buck,’ Steve warns softly, standing next to his soulmate.

‘No, Stevie.’ James’ glowering again, close to his Winter Soldier one. ‘It’s all his fault. I’m not even going to be surprised if he’s HYDRA and it he was on it with the kidnapping.’

‘Buck, please.’

‘So, you better leave now, or not even Steve will be able to hold me back from all the things I want to do with you,’ James threatens.

‘Enough,’ Tony orders. He runs his free hand over his face, the headache starting to come forward on full force again. ‘Bruce is here because he’s my friend,’ he tells both the super soldiers. ‘And he’s not HYDRA.’

‘You can’t—’

‘I know that, Sergeant,’ he presses, putting authority in voice. ‘We’ve been in the same circle since we were young. He’s my competitor since then. And I’m smart enough to know that you have to make your enemies closer, or as Pepper use to call it: stalk your enemy creepily.’

‘You’ve always been a Peeping Tom on me, Stark?’ Bruce looks more amuse than surprise at the confession with his raised eyebrow.

Tony snorts. ‘As if you’ve never gotten your nose in my business as well.’

‘You’ve always made your business quite interesting, and hard to ignore,’ Bruce replies.

Steve clears his throat, ceasing Tony’s answering remark.

‘I’ll come by again, Tony.’ Bruce rises up from his seat, eyes on the two super soldiers.

‘Don’t be a stranger,’ he tells the other billionaire. ‘And if you can come back with Alfred’s cookies, you can get me dirty on my back again.’

A metal squeaks, but it’s swallowed by Bruce’s laughter.

‘I do like you in such position, especially under…’ He trails off and leaves a kiss on top of Tony’s head. ‘Looking forward to it,’ he says when he pulls back, eyes gleaming with mischief that Tony’s clueless of.

‘Bye, Bruce,’ he bids as the other billionaire exits the door happily. When the doorknob clicks, he turns to the two super soldier, who both look annoyed — jealous almost, but that can’t be true, right?

**

**

‘You can’t see that man again,’ Bucky tells the genius. And he knows he’s being blowing this out of proportion, sixty percent because he’s jealous and angry at Tony and Wayne’s parting exchange.

‘And why?’ Tony demands, glaring back at Bucky fiercely despite all bandaged-up in a hospital bed and not as near as reprimanding as he thinks he is.

‘Because… Uhmm…’ God, is it hard to make his reasons sound sane when it’s all fuelled by jealousy. He turns to Steve for help, but the blond clearly doesn’t know what to do as well. Maybe they should have planned this ahead. ‘Because… he’s not safe, okay?’

‘Did you not hear me what I just said, Frosty?’ Tony sounds frustrated and tired. ‘Bruce is trustworthy. He’s not HYDRA.’

‘How else would you explain Sokovia?’ Bucky argues.

Tony closes his eyes tightly as if he’s trying to fight back an upcoming headache. ‘Sokovia,’ he begins, opening his eyes reluctantly, ‘is not his fault. It’s the general hazard of being an Avenger.’ His brown eyes are piercing. ‘It’s with Bruce’s help that we managed to intercept that HYDRA base without much civilian casualty. He’s the one who gave information about the sceptre’s whereabouts even before Thor managed to get Loki on Earth. And even with Loki, it would have taken some time to point out the sceptre’s exact location. That time alone could have given HYDRA enough opportunity to use the power of the sceptre for mass destruction.’

Bucky didn’t know that Wayne is that significant to this Sokovia mission. But it doesn’t matter because his irrational thought can easily ignore all of Wayne’s importance and focus solely on how the man wasn’t able to protect Tony, and is still trying to get together with Tony. He won’t turn a blind eye to that.

Tony needs someone who can save him, who will be there for him when he’s defenceless. Because Tony might be a strong superhero, but he’s still a man; and human’s can still have their moment of vulnerability. And someone dependent should be there to defend Tony when he can no longer do so for himself.

‘So, I hope this is the finality of the discussion, Sergeant,’ Tony informs. ‘I won’t stand it anymore, with how you’re trying to accuse an innocent person who’ve done nothing but help for the greater good.’

And Bucky wants to argue again, because he can’t stand it as well that Tony’s taking Wayne’s side. But Steve wounds his hand on Bucky’s bicep, ceasing him from further upsetting Tony because the genius isn’t on his best health. Bucky needs to remember that and be considerate of it. Clearly, his debate isn’t rational, and basically it’s just him projecting his anxiety and exhaustion over the last few days when the engineer was kidnapped and unconscious.

But it’s hard to not blame Wayne for all of Tony’s suffering under that sadistic HYDRA agent, even after he had gotten creative with the agent’s face after they rescued Tony. Bucky can picture that day as clear as if it was yesterday and not a whole week ago.

Three days after the first video was sent JARVIS had managed to track the video source. Somewhere in the coast of Spain. And two hours later they have drawn out a plan to rescue Tony.

Loki and his glamour played a huge role in the rescue. Him and Thor went to the HYDRA rendezvous point in France where they bluff an exchanged, while him, Steve and Natasha head to the secret base to rescue Tony, because no way in hell will HYDRA return the engineer after getting the sceptre and the Winter Soldier. It was an ambush.

A small battalion awaited the two alien gods glamoured as Steve and Bucky with the sceptre. But they all perished in the end because really, what can HYDRA goons do against gods. Clint, Sam, and Rhodey were also there for support to contain the casualty.

Meanwhile, back in the base, Bucky wreak havoc with his two companions. Him more than the other two because Natasha was stealing important files and destroying them so they won’t be used anymore. Steve on the other hand secured Tony and brought him to Dr. Banner. Bucky had a free rein to soak the floor with blood because he needed to unleash his anger.

It wasn’t his best moment, and he regret it a bit because it reminded him of his Winter Soldier days. His therapist wasn’t supportive of it either. But somehow — despite how fucked up it sounds — it was freeing. And maybe Steve had to pull him back to sanity after the carnage, and how close he was to killing Tony’s tormentor.

‘Look,’ he begins, feeling guilty for upsetting Tony when they just got him back and he’s not completely healed, ‘I’m sorry for being rude to Wayne…’ And Tony’s looking at him hopefully. ‘But, you can’t really blame me — us — for suspecting him, because he returned home fine. But you… you were taken. And then, they… they send us videos. Videos of your torture.’

‘What?’ Tony’s eyes grow wide.

‘You don’t know?’ Steve inserts. ‘They sent us long videos of you being tormented by Andrei.’ He places an arm around Bucky’s shoulder, stopping the tremble that takes over Bucky’s body at the thought of those vile videos. Of Andrei’s fists landing on Tony’s ribs and face. And the knives.

‘I didn’t know that,’ Tony mumbles.

‘I’m sure that’s also Andrei’s thoughts when he was generous with his punches, unconscious of what can happen to him with each blow he’s left on you.’ Bucky all but growls.

There’s a small horror in the engineer’s eyes. ‘You captured him?’

‘He’s alive,’ Steve replies.

‘Unfortunately,’ Bucky adds sourly.

‘We need him alive for informations,’ the blond reminds, but he also wasn’t happy that the sonuvabitch is still breathing after what Tony had gone through under his dirty hands.

‘Good,’ Tony agrees. ‘Maybe he can point us to the remaining HYDRA bases.’

‘You don’t have to worry about that, sweetheart,’ Steve says. ‘You need to rest. Doctor’s order. And we’ll take care of everything, okay?’

The shock on Tony’s face at the sweet moniker is cute, and distressing. Bucky’s once again reminded that Tony had to live all these years thinking that Steve was for Bucky alone. And he can sympathise with the engineer’s pain, and wishes Tony didn’t have to feel all alone and abandoned.

And true to Tony nature, he ignores the nickname and acts as if Steve had slipped up. But Bucky knows his blond soulmate didn’t. They’ve talked about this: the both of them. He had come clean with the truth to Steve and did his own research about trio soulmate bond.

Apparently, their kind of bond is rare. Not a lot has been written about it. And now that he’s sure Steve is also Tony’s soulmate, Bucky’s confident that they can all work it out. There’s enough love to go around with the three of them. No one needs to be left out, like he feared. Everyone will have enough of what they deserve — and hopefully more — even if Bucky’s scared he’s going to fuck it up at times.

He’s been doing a lot of thinking, right here besides Tony’s bed for the first three days that the billionaire had been unconscious. Him and Steve were sitting on each side of Tony’s bed when they’ve discussed their situation.

Before, Bucky’s been scared of adding Tony to their dynamic because he’s afraid that he’s not going to be enough to love two amazing people at the same time, and give them the love that’s not in pieces but whole and sufficient and everything Tony and Steve deserve. Up to this day, he still thinks that what he’s providing for Steve isn’t adequate for what he had been given.

Now, it’s different. Bucky will forever try to be worthy of their love — or whatever love they can spare him. And maybe he’ll come around the fact that he deserves them, too. That the universe had made a perfect match out of them. All three of them.

And they are perfect, he realises, now that his fear of being not enough isn’t as loud as before. Not when he knows he can keep Tony — because after almost losing the engineer, he will never let him go again, come heaven or hell — and know that if he fuck up at times, Steve will be there to give Tony what Bucky can’t because he’s broken. And Steve, his idiot, beloved Stevie who will be taken care of as well on times Bucky doesn’t think he can.

Slowly, he wants to accept this twisted and wonderful fate he had been given. The fear may continue to echo inside his head, but he’s got two marvellous soulmate who will help silence his demons. And in return, he’ll try to protect them and love them and cherish them for as long as he’s breathing. They are his life now, his reason to become better. They are everything.

‘And there’s something we need to talk to you about,’ Steve begins. And Bucky can see Tony’s guard rising up at the seriousness in Steve’s voice. He bets that if the genius isn’t bedridden he’d probably try to avoid them.

Tony cracks a fake smile. ‘Whatever it is, I’m sure I have a valid explanation,’ he jokes. ‘And before we proceed… with whatever this is, I do believe that according to my Miranda Rights, I have the right for an attorney, right?’

‘That’s a lot of right in one single sentence,’ Bucky points out teasingly, trying hard to calm the sudden anxiety in Tony. And maybe for himself as well, because this is it. The moment of truth.

‘I’m not sure if this is the right time for this conversation,’ Steve says, sitting down on the vacant part of Tony’s bed. For someone so big, Steve managed to be careful about the genius’ injured thigh. ‘But… after all that’s happened, I don’t think this can wait. Not after we’ve seen you be tortured and almost die.’ His blue eyes sincerely hold Tony’s brown ones in silent query to proceed. Tony barely nods. ‘Tony… all the nights we’ve waited for you to open your eyes felt like forever. And, at times it felt like you won’t open them again.’

‘Cap…’ Tony’s hand moves as if to wipe the rogue tears on Steve’s cheek, but he stops mid action as he sees Bucky, and drops his hand instead.

‘Those were unbearable days.’ Steve sniffs. ‘And we couldn’t do anything. We couldn’t protect you, or tell you that you have to come back because… because life without you would never be worth living.’

It’s Bucky’s turn to put a supporting arm on Steve’s shoulder.

‘But you have Bucky to live for, Cap,’ the genius reasons out. ‘He’s your soulmate.’

‘And so are you,’ Steve states. ‘We saw the video. You... you said my name.’

The silence that follows is loud. Tony’s face undergoes a series of emotion. There’s fear, loneliness, denial, and pain etch on his feature. Steve remains glued to his seat as he waits for Tony to process the news.

Tony chuckles without humour. ‘I think now is the perfect time to demand a lawyer?’

‘Tony, please.’

‘No, Cap.’ The ever so stubborn Tony Stark, almost as stubborn as one Steve Rogers. ‘This is a mistake. You and Bucky are bonded, and I’d be a selfish bastard to come between that.’ His voice cracks a little. ‘And I won’t. I promise. I will never come between the two of you. You both deserve each other. You survived the war together and managed to find each other in this century… that’s a miracle by itself, and a true testament that you’re for meant to be.’

‘You and me are the same,’ Steve insists.

‘It’s not.’ Tony shakes his head. ‘It’s nothing but some cosmic mistake. Or the universe trying to doom you into being with someone like me.’

‘Doom? Tony, anyone would be lucky to have—’

‘You’re just saying that now, Spangles. But in the next week or maybe tomorrow, you’ll regret even looking my way. And what of Bucky? He’s going to kill me if I ever made you cry, which I already did by the way, by almost dying.’ He looks defeated. ‘This isn’t going to work, Cap. I’m a fuck up, too many issues, broken, etcetera. And you’ve got Bucky, who’s got amazing sense of humour and caring and remembers birthdays. Surely, you don’t want to trade all that for—’

‘Please don’t finish that sentence,’ Steve requests. ‘Also, for the record, I’ve been half in love with you after the battle of New York… How can I not be, when you’ve given me a home, your valuable time, your precious friendship. You’ve given me new purpose to live after I’ve lost everything I hold dear.’

Tony lets go of a heavy sigh and looks away from Steve. ‘Snowflake, help me out here,’ he says to Bucky. ‘Aren’t you going to fight for your man?’

‘I am,’ he replies, which Tony nods to in approval. The genius even turns to Steve to gloat. He circles around the bed to get to the other side. ‘And I’m scared… I don’t know what to say, or what I’m going to do if this doesn’t work out, because for these past weeks I’ve been tormented by this very moment… and how you’re going to react…’

Tony’s eyebrows furrow. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘I am going to fight for Steve… as I am going to fight for you,’ Bucky continues. ‘Because you might hate me after learning the truth, but I’m just going to take that. I’d have whatever emotion you can scrap for me… because after losing you… I don’t think I’ll be able to live with myself that you’ll never know — that, that to me, you’re an amazing person… that you’re kind and selfless… that you’re very easy to like… and...’ He tries to swallow the anxiety forming in his throat. ‘And to love… Anthony Edward Stark.’

The engineer’s eyes grow wide, his lips parted in a small o that in a different scenario, Bucky would find cute. But not now. Not when Tony knows the truth: he’s soul bond to his parents’ murderer.

‘Tony?’ Steve puts a anxious hand on his shoulder.

‘I know how complicated it makes everything,’ Bucky proceeds, not meeting those brown eyes. ‘Especially that, it’s my… my hands… I was the one who… who…’ His hands clench into fist, and he exhales through his nose. ‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry… Your, your pa-parent’s de—’

‘It’s okay,’ Tony says. ‘It’s okay… You don’t have to apologise for it anymore, Snowflake.’ The genius reaches for Bucky’s hand. ‘You can move on now… I have. And you should, too.’

God, that cautious touch, making him feel like he’s something valuable, something precious, and not something broken or disgusting. Bucky looks up to Tony, his vision a bit blurry by the unshed tears. ‘You deserve more.’

‘I can say the same to you, James.’ Tony gives him a timid smile and squeezes Bucky’s hand tenderly.

And fuck, hearing his name fall from Tony’s lips with care and softness, makes him outright cry. Tears spilling like tsunami waves in his eyes. The weight that usually sit in his chest vanishes at the warmth he’s receiving. How did he get so lucky after all that he’s done?

‘Oh my god, I made the Winter Soldier cry,’ Tony teases, but his voice is a little hoarse. And Bucky doesn’t even want to glimpse at those kind brown eyes or else he’s going to make a greater fool of himself.

‘This is very progressive,’ Steve comments.

‘Did your therapist say that?’ Tony asks.

‘Yes, and it’d do you good too if you see one yourself.’ Bucky sees the genius pouts and just about to retort when Steve adds, ‘And Bruce doesn’t count because he’s not that kind of doctor.’

‘But I like Bruciebear,’ Tony insists. ‘He’s understanding. And he cuddles me afterwards and tells me I’m an idiot and problematic but he still likes me.’

‘I can… do that for you, too,’ Steve offers, blushing a little. ‘Bucky can, too.’

Now it’s Tony’s turn to blush, looking at Steve as if he can’t believe what the blond had said. Then he turns to Bucky with the same incredulous expression.

‘We’d be happy to listen to you,’ the blond continues. ‘And hold you.’

Tony pulls his hand from Bucky and puts them on his lap. He stares at both of his hand as he plays with them, just to do something other than look at both super soldiers.

Bucky’s crying had stopped as he finds his other soulmate in such a shy and adorable situation. Who knew someone like Tony who flirts like he breathes, and a literal ad for sexy no matter what he wears or what he does, blushes so easily?

‘And kiss you,’ Bucky adds, wiping his face with the back of his flesh hand.

‘Can we do that, Tony?’ Steve asks, voice dripping with sincerity and hope.

‘Oh my god,’ Tony exclaims. ‘You’re going to be the death of me.’ He glares at them, but the red in his cheeks never fades. ‘I am old with a poor heart, you rascals.’

‘Don’t worry,’ Bucky says, feeling brave and sure for the first time, because Tony’s forgiven him. Tony wasn’t disgusted with him when he learned Bucky’s also his soulmate. ‘We’ll take good care of you.’

And Christ, if Tony doesn’t look endearing all flustered. They did that. He wants Tony to always look this lovely shade of red when him and Steve showers him with love and compliments. Never again does he wants to see the genius lonely or unhappy.

‘We promise to take good care of you.’ Steve reaches for one of Tony’s hand. ‘If you let us.’ His other hand comes to cup Tony’s face delicately, making the genius look him in the eyes. ‘Will you let us?’

**

**

3 months later…

Every wound has healed but Tony continues to have nightmares of dirty water and cold rooms. The smell of rust also makes him anxious, and the sight of blood turns him pale. But he’s doing better.

He wants to think it’s because of Bruce’s advance medicines — those amazing poultice for his burns, the miracle drugs for his broken bones, and the gel for his healing thighs stitches. As much as Banner said he isn’t that kind of doctor, he’d developed some sublime medication. And maybe, this is also Bruce’s way to amend for the deaths he had done in the past. Tony understands that more than anyone else.

His hospital days seem to be long gone, but it had been such an event. Everyone visited him, and someone always stayed with him, usually it’s Steve and James. Even Loki had the heart to see him and offered to help with his healing. Tony said no, having done with magic. Also, not trusting Loki.

After the confession between him and the Wonder Twins, everyone in their close circle seem to have heard of their fate. It’s not shocking since they have two skilled spies in the group. He also came clean with Pepper and Rhodey about it.

Pepper cried and told him that she’s happy for him, even if he was such an idiot for thinking he didn’t deserve the two super soldiers. His two best friends made him promise to be honest with them, that he shouldn’t have to suffer alone anymore.

And according to Steve, Rhodey and Pepper did a shovel talk with him and James. James is still shaken, although they both wouldn’t say what exactly Rhodey and Pepper threaten them of. So, that’s his life right now.

He slowly peels his eyes open and inspects his room. It’s so damn cold in the morning. And he hates the cold.

He sits up on the bed and realises that he’s also alone. He hates being alone, as much as he hates to admit it, because it makes him sound clingy. Just weeks after he’s been discharged, there had always been someone with him, even when Steve and James had slowly moved in to his suite.

He likes waking up with Natasha the most because she plays with his hair and reads him poems in Russian. No one allows Clint to watch over him because one time they broke the glass table in Tony’s living room and set fire in the kitchen. Thor’s on Loki duty till both gods went back to Asgard. Bruce is a stingy caregiver because he won’t allow Tony to use his tablet, saying the radiation is bad for his healing.

Pepper stays sometimes too, when she’s not busy with the company. Rhodey had been called back to work a few days after Tony’s discharge, and he insisted that his best friend should go because he’ll be fine. Only when Bruce and Nat convinced Rhodey that they’ll look after him did his Platypus leave.

Now, that he’s fully healed, no one has to look over him anymore. He misses being pampered with attention, somehow. But his family also have their own lives to live and he should probably wean himself out of his dependency. He’s okay on his own anyway, Howard trained him so.

But fate thinks so otherwise because…

‘Tony?’ Steve knocks.

And he’s not sure he should complain. Never look at the gift horse in the mouth, they say.

‘I’m decent,’ he jokes and smiles at the blond when Steve enters the room — their room, he reminds himself. Heavens, that will continue to surprise him on the days to come. ‘And you don’t have to knock every time, Spangles.’

‘It’s okay.’ Steve’s smile in return is soft and it melts Tony’s inside just thinking that it’s all for him. That he can now honestly say that the smile is for him. No need to pretend. And it makes his heart burst with so much happiness.

‘That’s unfortunate, doll,’ James chirps, following Steve into the room from their morning run. ‘Was looking forward to see some naughty stuff.’ He presses a kiss on Tony’s bed hair and sits next to him. ‘How was your sleep, sugar?’

And that’s another thing that Tony will never get use to. He literally pinches himself just to be sure that he’s not dreaming, because he’s not sure that he’s allowed to have all of these. To have both Steve and James.

‘Not even a proper kiss.’ He pouts at James. The corners of the super soldier’s eyes crinkle with happiness. And he’s glad to see James happy. It took some time to convince the ex-assassin that Tony likes — the other L word can wait, because he doesn’t want to scare them both off by his clingy feelings — him just as much as Tony likes Steve.

Both the super soldiers chuckle at him. And because the other brunet is closer, James leans in and kisses him sweetly, a hand — the metal one at that! — holds his face in position. He closes his eyes and savours James’ warm mouth.

This is another thing he can never get over: being kissed. He had his share of kisses in the past. But never like this. Not even close. And he didn’t know he was missing a lot before, because who knew that kisses could be an out-of-this-world experience.

Well, in all honesty, Tony’s imagination is nothing compared to the reality of kissing any of his soulmates. It’s like a thrilling adventure and a warm home all at once. He never wants to stop feeling his heart hammering like it’s going to runaway with the happiness he cannot contain inside his chest.

‘My turn.’ Steve directs Tony’s face to the other side of the bed where he’s sat. Like a sunflower following the sun, he goes willingly and welcomes Steve’s perfect lips against his own.

He hums happily when Steve deepens the kiss, mouth expertly moving in demanding pursuit, and Tony allows Steve to take whatever he wants. He groans encouragingly, matching Steve’s enthusiasm. He’s always going to be amaze that Steve kisses like Tony’s mouth is something he needs to conquer and own. Definitely, not something Tony had imagined and expected.

Kissing Steve makes Tony feel safe even when the man kisses possessively. It’s hot and sexy, and dangerously mind melting. He can’t think when Steve kisses. His brain becomes a puddle of useless goo that just chants: SteveSteveSteve. It’s nice to have someone take control, and for him to simply do nothing but feel the exhilarating mouth on his.

When Steve pulls back so they can both breathe, James’ metal hand cautiously guides him back for another kiss. And James kisses him with the same burning passion as Steve did, but mellow like Tony’s delicate and precious.

James kisses opposite than Steve, Tony wants to think it’s because the man is still cautious with physical affection since he’s still not used to it, and he’s considerate of Tony’s fragility. And Tony loves him for it. A part of him wants to reassure James that he’s not going to break.

But nonetheless, kissing James is still an experience. His mouth is always eager to please and give Tony as much as he wants. Everything about James’ kisses turns Tony into a greedy goblin who takes and takes and takes. James turns him into an insatiable black hole that thirsts for those pretty lips like one needs air.

James lets him go, but connects their foreheads together and waits for Tony to catch his breath. He can feel Steve circling his arms on his waist as he rest his head on Tony’s shoulder.

God, what good had Tony done in his past life to deserve both these amazing super soldiers? His luck might be changing. That or something bad is about to happen. A man like him doesn’t deserve to keep this happiness without paying for it.

‘Shhh…’ Steve murmurs, hands tightening around Tony’s waist. ‘We’re not going anywhere.’

‘Are you a mind reader now, Capsicle?’

‘No, but I can feel your body language,’ Steve replies.

And he notices that he did suddenly went stiff. ‘Sorry.’

‘It’s okay, doll,’ Bucky soothes and places a kiss on Tony’s forehead before he pulls back. ‘We understand.’ He gets a hand on Tony’s nape and massages the area. ‘More than you know. Especially for me.’ He meets Steve’s eyes.

‘I’m just happy you gave us a chance, Tony,’ Steve says. ‘I didn’t even know you were gay —.’

‘Bi,’ Tony corrects.

Steve rolls his eyes affectionately. ‘Yes, that.’ He places a kiss on the side of Tony’s head. ‘Not only that, I didn’t even know I was falling in love with you. Not till Bucky said he loves you, too.’ He reaches and holds Bucky’s free hand, intertwining their fingers. ‘And that instead of being jealous, I was happy to learn that he feels the same way about you.’

‘God, you’re enlightenment is awful, Steve,’ he teases and laughs. He felt the blond tenses behind him. He mentally curses himself for saying something that have upset Steve.

‘You said my name,’ Steve states in disbelief before Tony could say his apology. ‘You said my name.’ The man’s smiling ear to ear. ‘Say it again… please.’

And Tony wants to die of embarrassment that very moment for his slip up. He still tries to avoid using both super soldiers’ names if he can because it feels like a grand declaration of that L-word he tries not to think about, even when he’s just dying to say it.

He knows the feelings of saying someone’s name because he surely feels elated and whole whenever Steve or James say his name with adoration and care. And he wants them both to feel the same when he says their names. But he’s scared. Afraid that it’s not the same for them as it is for him, because he’s Tony. Broken Tony, flawed Tony, narcissistic Tony, who might never be enough.

‘Tony,’ Steve whispers. And suddenly Tony’s whole world flips. Literally, because Steve easily tosses him on his back. ‘Say it again. Please.’ Steve hovers above him, arms bracketing Tony’s head.

Tony looks at James for any semblance of help, but the other brunet only looks as hopeful. He gazes back into expectant baby blues. It drowns him, the want to let it all go and bare his feelings for these two amazing people.

‘I’m sorry, sweetheart,’ Steve says and leans down to kiss him. ‘I didn’t mean to be so demanding.’ Another kiss. ‘Take your time. We have many days ahead of us… We’ll wait and still be here.’ Another kiss.

Tony wounds his arms on Steve’s shoulders and pulls the man for a deeper kiss. ‘Steve,’ he whispers on the man’s lips. ‘Steve.’ He kisses the tip of the man’s nose, who’s currently semi-catatonic. ‘Steve.’ He kisses just above the blond’s left eyebrow.

‘I think you broke him,’ James comments amusedly.

‘Oh my god.’ He should be worried but he can’t help the goofy smile on his lips.

‘Sir, you have a visitor,’ JARVIS interrupts.

‘Who is it, J?’ he asks.

‘Mr. Bruce Wayne,’ JARVIS replies.

In unison, both super soldiers groan with irritation. And Tony wants to chastise his boyfriends — can he call them that too besides soulmates? — to be nice to Bruce, especially James.

‘Tell him I’ll be down in five,’ he tells JARVIS.

‘Message relayed, sir,’ JARVIS informs.

‘Thanks, J.’ He smiles at his AI, always proud of his smart creation. He turns to the super soldiers who’s not happy about Bruce being here… again. But it’s a regular thing now that they’re working on a project along with Dr. Banner. ‘No more comment, boys. We talked about this.’

And they did. Tony had explicitly explained to his possessively jealous soulmates that nothing happened between him and Bruce, despite Clint’s lewd comments and teasing the morning after the gala. Or even after Bruce’s continuous mentions about that night in such off proportion. The only reason that Tony got dirty and was on his back was because they were working on a machine.

Sometimes, Bruce likes to get a kick out of it just to pester the Wonder Twins. Tony should probably tell him to stop in case Brooklyn One and Two do something drastic. Although, a tiny part of him — which he will deny to his grave — likes the idea that he can invoke jealousy.

‘I have work to do, boys,’ he tells them, pushing Steve off of him so he can see Bruce. Steve doesn’t budge. ‘Again, we talked about this.’

‘I know,’ Steve agrees. ‘And we’re going to be okay with it… Just give us a second though.’ The blond starts to slither one hand underneath Tony’s top, mapping warm skin. His mouth finds its way to Tony’s collarbone. ‘Right, Buck?’

‘Steve,’ he whines, trembling under that dexterous hand that caresses his torso. And suddenly there’s a cold metal hand on his bare knee, opening his legs. James leans down to the patch of skin that Steve has unwrap. ‘James.’

And god, these super soldiers are annoying as fuck. But Tony can feel himself getting hard at each heated kiss left on his body. They touch him and kiss him and leave their marks. Marks that will never fade for a few more days. Marks that Bruce will see.

God, they are the worst. But fuck does he need more.

‘Please…’ he begs, never been shy when it comes to sexual intimacy. Not now when his whole body is on fire and just needs to be touch. His brain is nothing but a string of want want want.

They’ve never had done beyond a handjob or blowjob before. But that doesn’t mean that Tony doesn’t completely lose his mind over those, because as he’s learned, everything done between him and his soulmates had been nothing short of spectacular. He could lose his mind alone just being kissed or embraced by them.

Being touch by them like this? He forgets his own name.

‘Please…’ He pulls Steve away from the second hickey he’s trying create. Steve obliges him to a kiss, while James continues to pepper his chest with kisses, a small bite here and there. The metal hand pinches his nipple, just a tad painful. He gasps into Steve’s lips.

‘We’ll never stop you from seeing him, Tony,’ Steve promises, eyes slightly darker. ‘But after this. Don’t you agree?’ His hand squeezes Tony’s clothed erection.

‘Yes,’ he replies hastily, more concern about getting off and the wonderful hands on him, than his friend downstairs.

‘Good,’ James approves and pulls Tony’s nipple a bit more that has the genius moaning. ‘God, you’re so responsive and beautiful like this.’ He licks on the other one. ‘And all ours.’

‘JARVIS, please tell Mr. Wayne to go ahead with Dr. Banner,’ Steve states. ‘Tony will need another ten more minutes.’

And Tony’s not sure if JARVIS did manage to reply or not. He can’t concentrate, not when Steve’s got a hand wrap around his dick.

**

**

After coming twice — once on Steve’s hand, and next on Bucky’s clever mouth — Tony weakly proceeds to meet his two colleagues for their project. He had a quick shower before seeing them just to get rid of the smell of sex. But he can’t really cover the decorative love bites Brooklyn One and Two left on his neck.

His friends only rolled their eyes at him and didn’t say anything more as they continue their work. God, he hates his soulmates. He plans on going even with them in the future.

And it puts a cheesy smile on his face at the thought that the three of them has a future together. That’s more than what Tony had wished for. He promises to try his best to be worthy of his soulmates. Even when they’re irrational sometimes. They can all work it out, because Tony’s irrational sometimes too.

But yes, the payback. He needs to think of a brilliant and dubious plan to punish the both of them. Maybe Natasha can help him.

 **

**

Fin.