#ive been trying to delete that from my mind ever since

[evilkaeya]

love when i give a piece of media my 110% attention and still walk out confused

[sorcerersseestars]

 his eyes, your ears [part iv]

series masterlist

Gojo Satoru x reader

summary: There was a time when you called him best friend, but those days escaped you long ago. There’s no way he’s alive – right? With the depth of his betrayal still lingering in your heart and mind, what would his reappearance spell for your life?

pairing: gojo satoru x gn! reader

genre: angst, hurt/comfort

fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

warnings: cursing, lowkey a little mental torture, TW! s*xual a*sault (forced kiss), violence!!, one instance of vomiting (sry), immoral and creepy Geto, reader is kinda anxious nonstop (like writer like reader?), some details are non-canon (a/n 2.0 at end explains), also it’s slow for the first half but picks up I promise, I think I made Geto sound British???, also I made Hanami act like a mom kinda 💀 uh…im going to call it comic relief?

word count: 6.7k. oof.

a/n: I am literally SO SORRY that this has been sitting in my drafts for so long but… life happens! Along those lines – I wrote 1/2 of this in September and 1/2 of it in May, so it might be a bit disjointed sorryyy hehe

“I didn’t ask for this.”

“Then you’ll have to live with disappointment,” He flashes you an all-too-pleased-with-himself smile. “Becaaause it’s totally permanently in your phone now.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah, right. As if I wouldn’t be able to delete a contact.”

He has a devilish smirk on his face, but his voice is annoyingly innocent and cheerful. “Go ahead, try!”

You gasp. “Gojo! Did you jailbreak my new phone?!”

“Uh, uh! That not what my contact reads as!” He snatches your phone from your hands, and points a large finger to the tiny name on your screen. “It’s ‘My Beloved Best Friend Satoru’!”

“Satoru,” You say dangerously. “Erase this or I’ll erase you from existence.”

He chuckles. “Oh, I’d love to see you try. You’re cute when you try to beat me.”

Your mouth opens and closes as you try to find words, and you try to ignore the heat on your cheeks. “S-Satoru! You asshole, give me my phone back!”

He holds it high above your head, a wide smile lingering on his face. He’s having way too much fun with this. You jump, trying to swat it out of his hand, but to no avail.

“Why did you even do this?” You grumble, sighing. “What, is it ‘how many ways can I torture (Y/N) in the span of a few hours’ day?”

He smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “You’re weak, remember? You gotta have me on speed dial if you want to survive in this line of work.”

First, your eyes widen at his blunt statement. Then you sigh again, this time a bit sadly. “Wow, you have so much faith in me…thanks.”

“You never know what’s out there,” Gojo says. “If you ever have any trouble, call me.”

You narrow your eyes at him, “Is this a prank? I thought you hated ‘helping the weak’.”

“I’m serious, (Y/N),” He says firmly. “I’ll always pick up. Abuse the privilege, whatever, I don’t care. Just don’t die.”

Your head snaps towards him, mouth hanging open with shock. “Satoru, what…? I’m not going to…”

You fall silent. There’s no guarantee of that.

He steps closer to you, closer than what you’d consider friendly. Your heart skips a beat.

“Just do it, okay? I’ll always be on the other end.”

Always, huh? But now…

Ring, ring, ring. You bite your lip, pressing your phone hard against your ear, as if his voice will appear if you wish it enough. Ring, ring, ring.

“Please…” You whisper. “Come on, come on.”

Your breath hitches as the distinctive timbre of Satoru’s voice fills your ear, but your shoulders fall almost immediately.

“Hey, sorry I’ve missed your call! If you close your eyes, recite my name five times, and spin around twice, I might get back to ya! No exceptions – not even–”

You sigh and hang up before you’re put through to voice mail. It’s not like he’ll listen to it, anyway.

He’s been avoiding you. You haven’t seen him for days – six, to be exact. It’s been five days since Shoko deemed you well enough to recover at home, despite the worryingly slow rate that your cursed energy has been returning. You were released with the promise you wouldn’t exert yourself and absolutely would not use any cursed energy. All the while, you had childishly held two crossed fingers behind your back – your promise was as empty as you felt.

You should have expected this; this shouldn’t hurt so much. Gojo is the strongest sorcerer the world has seen for hundreds of years. He never runs from his foes – he doesn’t need to. When it comes to facing emotions, however, he is all but mighty. Whenever his emotions run high, overflowing until they begin to leak out into broad daylight, he turns tail and practically erases himself from existence. It’s nearly impossible to find him – he mysteriously leaves no trace, even for an experienced tracker like you.

You left Shoko with an empty smile and promise, and Gojo has done just the same. Despite him swearing that he’d be back to see you, Gojo is nowhere to be found. You’ve dropped by at the school multiple times, even asking his students if they knew of his whereabouts, but nobody has been able to give you an answer.

He’s been dodging your calls, letting it ring until his chirpy voicemail message mocks you. The text messages you leave go unread, unopened.

When you hopelessly reopen your chat with him, you can’t help but bite yoru nails as you stare at the wall of blue on your screen. Message after message – unfinished thoughts, apologies, words full of urgency and desperation – are left by trembling hands bloodied by your own worry.

‘I’m the strongest,’ He always says, so why does fear spike in your veins at the thought of Geto finding him? 

Even though his own arrogant words ring through your head, you can’t quell the anxiety that threatens to wreak havoc over your fragile state. You’re worried, so worried, and it bleeds into the rest of your life: you’re all over the place, constantly forgetting appointments and important items, you are inexplicably tense, your breathing is constantly shallow and quick; you’re barely holding yourself together.

A few days ago, you had your meeting with Yaga, alone, which went just as horribly as you could have imagined, but you were thankfully spared contact with the higher-ups due to your condition.

But you’re almost all better now – at least physically. That’s why you’re back again, ready for another round of manipulation and abuse.

You’re out of it, so out of it. Your eyes are glazed over, and nothing they say registers in your mind. Even when you try to focus on the words leaving their mouths, your brain filters it all back into mindless noise.

There’s a sequence of very familiar syllables: ah, your name is being shouted. You look up with empty eyes, blinking slowly.

“Useless sorcerer, answer me, now!” Gakuganji roars. “You are testing our patience, and I’ve just about run out of it. Can you track him, or not?”

You breathe in shakily, and let out a weak, clueless, “What?”

“Track him, or they’re dead,” He spits. “Track Geto Suguru. Find him. We won’t wait long. If you haven’t reported back in a week, your parents won’t be able to enjoy their retirement any longer.”

Some of the other council members shift uncomfortably at his bluntness, but you barely even flinch.

You’re so tired of it all. You almost wish you had encouraged Gojo to just off them once and for all.

“Okay,” You mumble softly, lacking the energy to project your voice. “I can do it. I will track Geto Suguru.”

You drag yourself out without acknowledging them, without any show of respect, but the thought of caring is lost on you. Your apathy leaves a trail of displeased whispers, but you don’t even notice.

You speed-dial his number again and again and again, and are returned with nothing but the taunt of his cheerfully recorded memo.

When you finally look away from his contact info burning your retinas, your gaze is trained on the clear sky. It shouldn’t be so vivid, shouldn’t be so beautiful – today should be overcast and rainy. You can’t help but frown, but your eyes remain on the heavens.

Then you’re granted a sight that usually coaxes a smile out of you no matter how you feel: a particularly large gust of wind lays out a collection of reddening autumn leaves against the azure sky. They swirl and dance in the breeze, hovering in your field of vision for a few more moments before they are whipped away. 

It’s a sign of the changing of seasons – it has always been one of your favorite times of the year, especially during your years at Tokyo Jujutsu High. The rapid approach of the holidays and the time spent training with your classmates in the chilly air has always enlivened you.

Today, this sight drives fat tears to roll down your cheeks. It just serves to remind you of the juxtaposition between those blissful times and these turbulent times: the weight of Geto’s betrayal, his subsequent death, his impossible revival.

You turn your head to the side, eyes tracking the leaves as they dance into the distance. 

“So I’m really doing this then,” You whisper to yourself. “Yeah, guess I am. You’re not here to stop me…”

They’re far from Tokyo, much further than they were before. That much is obvious from the start, when you first scour for their residuals. After a disappointing first try by Jujutsu High - you shouldn’t expected much, anyway - you decide to return to their last known location: the forest you nearly were obliterated in. You dread returning there, but you have little choice unless you want to do a whole lot of guesswork.

You drive yourself there. Usually, you would be accompanied by your usual driver Ijichi, but the thought of asking him didn’t even cross your mind. In the eyes of the Jujutsu world, this is a suicide mission. You’re well aware of that: so why involve anyway else unnecessarily, risking innocent lives?

You’re grateful for the calming scenery that blurs by: miles and miles of inhabited land, solely occupied by woodland’s creatures. Hardly any curses are present in the countryside, as there are no humans to feed off of. Those special grades you faced were certainly the exception.

You pull over to the edge of the forest once you sense a steady stream of cursed energy. The residual energy is at least a week old - just around the time of your unfortunate encounter with them. You close your eyes and carefully sift through all of the cursed energy signatures left behind, immediately identifying Hanami’s and Jogo’s faint residuals. There’s one stronger energy, and very familiar: Satoru’s cursed energy.

His cursed energy is so easy to pick out, no matter where you are. It’s so bright and lively, practically humming under your fingers every time you sense it, almost as if it were your own.

But there’s a shadow – his energy shadows another. You concentrate, sensing an underlying current of a more recent energy. Your eyes fly open, startled by your discovery. It is much fresher than the others: the residuals are only a few days old.

Its signature is both unknown and yet alarmingly familiar. It’s dark, so dark. Its energy chokes you, holds you hostage with the way it starts to stick to you and steal your courage with its oppressiveness. You’ve never felt an energy quite like this, yet it feels all too familiar.

You begin to shake, the reality sinking in. “Geto…. Just what have you become?”

You shakily clamber back into the driver’s seat, firmly gripping the steering wheel with sweaty hands. Geto was here. Geto knows that you and Satoru were in the same vicinity as Jogo and Hanami. There’s absolutely no way he doesn’t know — you carelessly hadn’t wiped your residuals or even tried to cover your tracks.

You step on the gas. You keep your cursed energy flowing as you speed down the road, revealing a murky trail of residuals to follow. His cursed energy is so distinctly foul that you can pick it out from the rest with little effort. It’s overwhelming and makes you nauseous. Cursed with a twist of familiarity – a sickening combination.

Your mind begins to race. Is this how Gojo felt back then? No, it must have been so much worse, tracking one of your soulmates down with the intent to…to kill. And now you’re being forced to track him down again, just so the higher-ups can order Gojo to repeat history, just so your best friends will be forced to fight until one is–

You jerk the steering wheel over, making for a rough pull-over job. You throw yourself out of the car as quickly as possible before retching your stomach’s contents out onto the dark pavement.

The old wounds in your heart flare up; you clutch your chest desperately.

You are not strong enough to protect your parents - but are you strong enough to survive the alternative, the reality you and Gojo can’t help but deny?

“I have to,” You whisper to yourself. “I have to do this. I have no power in this world, I’m not the strongest…so this is all I can do.”

And so you are off again, this time unwavering from the course you’re set on.

By the time you reach Kyoto, an untimely five hours of panicked driving later, their residuals are so apparent that you hardly have to try. It’s almost as if they’re luring you in, the most sensitive tracker known in the Jujutsu world; why else would they leave behind such obvious traces of their cursed energy?

You ignore your instincts that scream for you to turn back, and instead continue into the outskirts of the most outer part of the residential areas – the residuals lead you far from the city itself.

As you venture further into the countryside, your stomach begins to clench. The residuals are much stronger now, but not alarmingly so. They should still be miles and miles out, perhaps 40 or 50 – there should be enough distance to not alert them of your presence. However, as a precaution, you stretch your hearing beyond the range of any normal human. You still feel unsettled, even with the extra layer of protection.

This is dumb. This is a terrible idea. Yet, you keep your foot firmly on the gas pedal.

You are suddenly flooded with an overwhelming wave of noise. Your brain barely has a second to process what your ears pick up: the roar of an object hurtling towards your car. You swerve to the roadside, and you’re barely fast enough: the driver’s side door is nearly scraped off, and it begins to smolder.

It shouldn’t be possible. They shouldn’t be here. Not again.

Running on pure adrenaline, you rip your seatbelt off and throw yourself to the passenger’s side door, seeking an escape from the next impending strike. Your hearing is more sensitive from your frenzied state, and you hear the next meteor much earlier this time. You rely on your hearing, on your hearing only: it will tell you where to dodge.

You climb out of the car, wheezing on smoke and fumes, and take off running. You gasp at the sound of the next meteor closing in on you and quickly dive away, throwing yourself to the ground and covering your head with your hands. The explosion is so intense that even after reducing your hearing, you feel the shock reverberate through your body and overpower any other sensation you feel.

After the ringing in your ears lets up for a moment, you finally feel the aftermath of the blast: shards of heated rock are embedded in your side, scorching your skin. There’s no time to even think about it: you’re up and running away from the voices that soon enter your hearing.

“You imbecile! Do you always have to do the opposite of what you’ve been ordered?” The grating tones of Hanami enter your ears as he hisses at Jogo. “He said captured alive! Or would you rather face his wrath?”

Captured? So they had been expecting your arrival; it was a trap all along.

“Relax, I haven’t even made a scratch yet!” Jogo shouts back.

“You’re embarrassing yourself in many ways,” Hanami scoffs. “If your intention was to kill, I will begin to further doubt your abilities. I already had to rescue you from that sorcerer, or has your pea-brain already forgotten that failure after it fell off of your body?”

“Shut up already,” Jogo growls. “I got it, okay?”

You truly don’t know what to do. Your last encounter made it very clear that you are solely a tracker with limited offensive ability. Hell, you didn’t even try last time because you knew it be to utterly pointless – the result would turn out no better if you tried now. Two special grades against a Grade 1 sorcerer with Grade 2 offensive abilities? You don’t stand a chance in that regard.

They’re in too close of proximity to disguise your presence – cutting off your cursed energy would be pointless. There’s only one other trick up your sleeve to increase your chances of surviving if they do decide to attack again.

You feel their cursed energies so much more clearly – when you steal a glance behind yourself, you can faintly see them in the distance. Not good.

Jogo suddenly barks out a laugh. “Boss never said we couldn’t rough anybody up though, did he? Got you there, dumbass! Don’t try to stop me!”

Really not good.

There’s a sudden spike in cursed energy – and that energy is heading straight for you. You try to dodge, but your reaction is too late. You feel the heat even before the impact, and you decide you definitely need to utilize your other ability. It’s not perfect, nor is it a full-fledged technique yet, but you have little choice but to use it now.

You concentrate all your energy into the side that will take the hit, and imagine an impenetrable wall. You think of Gojo’s Infinity: the space that can never crossed, no matter how much force is exerted. You don’t have the ability to manipulate space like Gojo, but your shield imitates his impenetrability.

Jogo’s fiery body slams into your side. Your breath is instantly knocked out of you, and the searing pain returns. Your shield absorbs the brunt of the strike, but you’re still knocked back at least thirty feet. You tumble into the undergrowth, your back squarely hitting a tree in your path.

You can’t stop the howl that escapes your lungs, and the ragged breathing that follows.

“They tried to stop it! It wasn’t even a fraction of my power and they couldn’t stop it! And you’re telling me that Gojo Satoru is interested in them?” Jogo howls in laughter. “How pathetic!”

At your next blink, Jogo has materialized in front of you. You weakly stagger to the side, wanting to get away but knowing you can’t deep down. They’re just toying with you – if they decided to get rid of you, they’d be able to almost instantly.

Jogo shouts loudly, “So weak it makes me sick! You can only run away, huh? Boss is right – creatures like you are disgusting.”

He rushes forward again, and you rush to encase yourself in your imperfect shield. To your surprise, you are not struck down: instead, you’re…in his arms??

“Hanami! Since you won’t let me have anymore fun, I guess we should go back,” Jogo yells across the clearing to the other Special Grade.

A burst of petals flies past your eyes; Hanami emerges from a newly-grown patch of flowers. They don’t say anything, but they approach Jogo and stand right over his shoulder. Jogo eyes Hanami suspiciously.

“Why are you hovering over me?” Jogo grumbles. “Stay away, tree hugger.”

“It’s almost as if he knew you were going to pull this,” Hanami huffs. “There’s a reason I’ve been keeping an eye on you.”

“They’re alive, that was the only request. Did Boss put you up to that ‘good guy’ act, huh? Agh, such arrogant scum! Thinks he can tell me what to do?”

Despite your shield, Jogo’s heat begins to affect you. You cough violently, and when you glance at your hands you see rivulets of red.

“Yes, I think that’s accurate, considering you call him ‘Boss’. Now, hand them over before they go up in flames.”

Jogo grunts unhappily, but complies. You’re transferred to the rough bark limbs of the tree cursed spirit. Hanami sighs at the sight of your angry red burns, eyeing Jogo, “Such a barbaric curse…destructive to all life and environment.”

“HAH! You-!” Jogo guffaws. “I’ve see you uproot your own forests! Environmentally friendly my ass! Shut your trap.”

You wince from his loudness.

“So obnoxious, isn’t he? Well, you’re the lucky one here - you get to take a nap,” Hanami says. “Rest well before your…‘meeting’.”

Your pulse quickens at the expression on the curse’s face: a demented sort of excitement. There’s a sweet floral smell that falls over you, and then you begin to grow sleepy. Your eyelids start to flutter as you try to fight it – but you are eventually pulled deep into a dreamless sleep.

You are roused from your sleep by the touch of another. A hand on your forehead – a comforting presence. It’s warm, and familiar. You’re about to smile widely and look deep into his crystal eyes, but when your bleary eyes begin to focus, your heart stops.

There’s an easy, gentle smile on his face. His dark eyes shine brightly, but your own can’t help but drift to the obvious surgical scar running across his entire forehead.

Your reflexes kick in: you smack his hand away, rejecting the unwanted touch, and fall into a defensive stance. He lets out a hum of amusement, but otherwise does not react.

“My old friend,” Geto Suguru coos. “How wonderful it is to see you again. Never thought I’d be able to – what a gift your presence is, my dear.”

It’s then that you realize that you’re shaking; your chattering teeth render you unable to let any words out.

“Did Jogo and Hanami rough you up again? How rude of them,” He sighs. “But don’t be scared, it’s just your old friend Suguru.”

He stops to let his eyes roam over your hunched form. A sickening smirk spreads across his face – sickening because it’s just like the sweet smiles he used to give you.

“You know, you really are the best tracker around. I have to say, I’m quite impressed. Too bad I know all your little tricks, though. Did you like the surprise I set up especially for you?” He smirks. “It’s hard to catch such a talented tracker as you off guard, but I think I managed quite well. You didn’t detect a thing, did you? They were supposed to be much further away, I know…it’s fascinating, isn’t it, the feats you can achieve through sorcery?”

You only stare at him in horror.

“No? Well, I know at least Jogo enjoyed it,” He says with a soft laugh, but his next words cause icy chills to run down your spine. “But I think I enjoyed it the most. The look on your face…was perfect.”

Your stomach turns at his words. His gaze is even worse: there’s a hungry, disturbing glint to them. Your eyes flit from his sharp onyx eyes to his traditional wear: his inky yukata and gilded kasaya are elegant and beautiful, but emanate darkness.

“Forgot what I looked like? It has been a while, hasn’t it?” Geto smiles. His smile is soft and almost sweet, but out of place; its familiarity makes your stomach churn.

“You shouldn’t be here,” You finally speak, voice quiet and cracking. “You shouldn’t exist.”

“That’s a bit harsh, doll. I’m not the only one who doesn’t belong in this world,” He says, lip curled in disgust. “Monkeys roam the earth. That’s more of a disgrace than my existence…I hope you’d agree.”

You only manage to gasp out, “How are you even here?”

His eyes meet yours, crinkling in a dark sort of amusement. “You’d love to know, wouldn’t you? There’s a price to pay for that knowledge, doll.”

“You’d…Geto would never hurt me,” You whimper. “Never.”

Geto just smiles. “I wouldn’t? Maybe not.”

His piercing eyes seem to see stare right through you. “But what about my best friend?”

You freeze.

“Is that such an uncomfortable thought?” He chuckles a little too lightly. “Never thought about it even once? Not even after he killed me?”

He tuts at you, clicking his tongue. “Sweetheart, I knew you were blinded by him, but never to this degree. How low you have fallen…”

He moves closer. Your breath is trapped in your lungs and you can’t move.

“One toe out of line and you might end up like me. Don’t you see?” He shakes his head.

Hot anger flashes through you, and your tongue lashes out before you can think. “One toe out of line? No. No. You committed genocide. You murdered your entire family in the name of it. For what? A delusional dream?”

He sighs. “Of course. So brainwashed…you’re practically a monkey. How disappointing. You don’t get it, do you? I was apparently his everything, and look how I ended up.”

“You’re not Geto!” You cry out. “You can’t be.”

He laughs softly, but his gaze is razor-sharp. “Are you sure these aren’t Geto’s thoughts?”

You bite your lip in nervous thought. “Ge- you…why am I here?”

He ignores your question as he begins to circle you like a hawk, eyes sharp and hungry. “You know, you’re not quite what I imagined you to be.”

You take a few tentative steps back, trying to subtly increase the distance between you and the living corpse in front of you, but he strides over to your side when he notices.

“I’m just so curious,” He says, eyes raking over your figure. “You really are (Y/N), aren’t you? Fits the descriptions…”

The blood drains from your face. You back away from his seeking hands that threaten to touch you, to investigate you.

“There’s a disgusting amount of papers with your name written all over them – I don’t think Hanami would have liked me much before. Such a waste of stationery,” He says, his twisted smirk pulling shivers down your spine. “Why was I so fixated on you? You don’t look like anything special. Don’t tell me…I actually fell for someone as plain as you?”

“What?” You breathe out, eyes wide, mouth parted in surprise. “Geto, you…he…it wasn’t like that.”

“And you didn’t even know,” He coos in faux pity. “How cruel to find out in this way. Seems like you have only ever focused on my former equal. You only pay attention to the strongest – how shallow. What did I ever see in you?”

“I- that’s not-“ You try to form a sentence, deny it, say it’s not true because it truly isn’t, but your tongue and vocal chords won’t cooperate with you.

“When confronted with the truth, humans get tongue tied,” He smiles, voice dripping with mockery. “How precious. What a good little monkey you are – so unbearably typical, so exemplary of your species.”

“Stop,” You gasp out.

“What, sweets? Can’t handle the truth?”

“Don’t call me that,” You try to say with conviction, but it leaves you weakly and softly, almost a plea.

“What, you only like it when he calls you that?” He says with a dark chuckle. “How pathetic. How much has you brainwashed you into thinking he acutally wants anything to do with you? Gojo doesn’t like to get attached. And even when he does–”

He leans forward, invading your space, pressing up too closely to your body. “–sometimes you still end up dead.”

“Stop,” You beg. “Get away from me. You’re-you’re scaring me, Suguru.”

“Am I?” He smirks. “Oh, I’m sorry. I know what to do to make you forgive me, though. Used to work on Shoko, too.”

“No, stop!” You cry, ragged breaths leaving you. “This isn’t you, stop, please, stop!”

“You’re right,” He smiles wickedly, eyes dark. “It’s not.”

His lips meet yours. It burns your skin, but not pleasantly – it’s all wrong, and it hurts. You shove him away with as much force as you can, leaving him stumbling back a few paces. He laughs. He laughs.

“Wow, I’m impressed,” He chuckles, amused. “You’re stronger than you used to be. Maybe you actually live up to being Grade 1 now, huh?”

“Who are you?!” You cry out. “Why did you bring me here?”

“I’m Geto Suguru,” He says with a crazed smile. “Is it that hard to believe when my body was never retrieved?���

“What do you want from me?” You snarl, growing angry. “You’ve just been toying with me, you bastard. Trying to play all these mind games on me, leaving your dirty work to your underlings. None of it feels substantial enough to kidnap me.”

A cackle escapes Geto, “You’re right, it isn’t. By yourself, you aren’t of any interest to me. Just a memento of the past – I don’t have any use for you.”

He continues with a smirk, “I have to say though, your reactions have piqued my interest slightly. Jogo seems to feel the same way. Perhaps if you could be our little monkey for entertainment - it might keep Jogo out of trouble elsewhere.”

Reduced to entertainment.

“You’re sick,” You say, shaking your head.

“Hardly. It’s only natural treatment for someone so unimportant. Should I be frank?” He asks, touching his chin to mock contemplation. “You are here solely as means of luring him out.”

You break out in a cold sweat. It was as you suspected and feared: you are only bait. Bait for the strongest.

“He won’t come,” You declare. “This is pointless.”

“Do you take me as an idiot monkey?” Geto frowns. “You’re not the only one who can read residuals. He came last time, and he will come this time.”

“He doesn’t know,” You hiss. “He won’t come. He doesn’t want to see me right now.”

Geto only smiles. “He’ll come.”

His confidence scares you. Even though it would be very unlikely Gojo is even aware that you’re away on a mission, doubt still swirls in your gut. You don’t want him to walk into this trap – who knows what Geto has planned?

While you mull over your thoughts, Geto grows impatient.

“This is quite dull. Let’s test your strength, First Grader,” He smirks. “Maybe they’ll pass you to Special Grade if you can land a single hit.”

Suddenly, your breath is stolen from you. You double over in pain, caught off guard by the assault to your stomach. It was only a kick, but it was the hardest you’ve been hit in your entire life by another sorcerer.

“Silly me, I’ve forgotten my manners,” Geto says drily. “When harkening back to our school days, I must ask if you’re ready before we spar.

But don’t forget, the enemy won’t wait for you. Didn’t we learn that?”

Satoru’s words. He would often preemptively attack before the sparring session officially began, and he would always recite those exact words. You feel sick.

You don’t respond, knowing it would take away from your focus. Instead, you concentrate on pouring your cursed energy into your hearing technique.

He begins his initial assault: he’s extremely agile, and his punches and kicks seem to come out of thin air. You anticipate his attacks with your highly developed sense of hearing, listening for each twitch of his muscles and the roar of his appendages slashing through the air. Essentially, you read his moves before he has finished them. Your body can’t always keep up with your hearing enough to avoid him, though, but the blows are lessened by your half-developed shielding.

You haven’t attempted a single hit of your own – all your energy has gone into avoiding each of his potent attacks. Every time you see an opening, your chance is ruined by another attack of his.

After a few minutes of religiously defending, your senses slow. You can hear everything, but you can’t physically keep up with him. You begin to take hit after hit after hit – until you’re forced to retreat several paces back. Blood drips from your nose, spilling into your mouth and filling your mouth with the metallic tang of iron. It tastes of defeat and cowardice.

“Are you sure you’re not a monkey?” Geto roars in laughter. “To call you a sorcerer is sacrilegious at best. How disappointing you are. Haven’t improved an ounce since our days together, have you? Other than that half-baked excuse of a technique - trying to imitate the strongest, perhaps?”

You ignore his taunts, using the time to draw out two small daggers from your sleeves. You fare better with bows, but the twin blades are better than nothing.

“What cute little pocket knives,” Geto jeers. “They look sharp.”

“Want to find out?” You growl.

He scoffs. “I’d like to see you try.”

It is a dance that never ends – you are held captive by the need to defend yourself, not able to stop without the fear of further injury. You are slowly giving up hope when time seems to slow down. Your breath hitches as you spot what you need desperately: an opening. You zero in on the opening, thrusting your right hand into the open space. A spurt of red splashes your hand – your aim was true.

You step back immediately, parrying his retaliating blow with your other blade. More droplets spill over you, a shower of red that makes you nauseous.

You’re breathing hard. You haven’t fought with a sorcerer – or even a curse – for a long time, and it’s taking more of your strength than you anticipated.

Geto doubles over, which fills you with confusion. There’s no way those two nicks did any substantial damage, so why is he hunched over in pain?

And then you hear it. Laughter. Crazed laughter erupts from him in waves. When he looks up at you, the fear in the pit of your stomach intensifies. He’s not hurt – he’s pissed off. Very.

“I have to admit, you exceeded my expectations. But that’s not saying much when I expected nothing from a dirty monkey like you,” He spits. “What a brat.”

“If I recall correctly, you were the one who wanted to spar like old times,” You glare, grip tightening on your daggers. “It was only per your suggestion.”

“Your insolence boils my blood…how does he care for someone like you?! How did I?!” He roars. “You are nothing!”

He rushes forward faster than you can register and knocks you to the ground. You instinctively roll out of the way and are still nearly stomped on. You try to stand up, or even just sit up, but can’t. You begin to panic – you feel frozen in place, unable to even turn your head.

“Now you can’t run away,” He growls. “Should I make it a little unbearable? You deserve it.”

You feel a great pressure forcing your body into the ground. It’s excruciating; you feel as if your bones are grinding together and all your muscles are compressed. You can’t bite back the cry that erupts from your throat.

“Now you really feel the gravity of the situation,” He says with a demented smile. “You know, maybe I don’t need you anyway. He can just come to retrieve your body. Can’t make the same mistake twice, after all. Leaving a body to rot is a vulnerability. I could fix that for him, too…leave a puddle where you used to stand? If I crush you long enough, perhaps…”

“Fuck you,” You manage to get out. “You’ll never win. You’ll never beat Satoru.”

You fall flat on your face, coughing, as you are released from his technique. You try to push yourself up, but you only manage to a kneeling position. Not that it matters anyway, not when you are grabbed by your throat and hoisted in the air.

“Do you always make so many mistakes?” He hisses. “It’s like you want me to kill you.”

You couldn’t respond even if you wanted to with how hard he’s clutching your trachea. You have no idea when you dropped your blades, but they’re not in your hands now, so you have to resort to pitifully clawing at his grip with your bare hands.

Your vision begins to blur and darken as you asphyxiate. Howls of laughter ring in your ears, getting quieter and then louder as your hearing fades in and out.

Is this how it will end? No, it can’t, you can’t let it. You can’t leave yourself to die at the hands of Geto Suguru. You can’t die at the hands of your former friend, and be found by your other best friend. You can’t do that to him.

You claw harder, more desperately, even though you feel yourself weakening. It’s futile – his grip won’t even loosen at your efforts.

You have to use your weaker technique. If you do it perfectly, it might propel him from your body, giving you a chance to escape. Escape to where, you don’t know, but you need to try. You don’t have any chance otherwise.

With a burst of strength you didn’t know you had, you focus all of your cursed energy into the skin that is touching Geto. Your close your eyes, visualizing the perfect invisible wall that encases Gojo – no flaws, no gaps, no way to get past – and then you release your energy.

There’s a loud smack that resonates through the air, and then you crumple to the ground. When you look up, you can see a hard shell jutting between you and Geto, effectively shielding you. Geto is clutching his arm, which is now red and swollen.

You actually did it. It was a perfect use of your technique.

“You are frustrating, but no matter. I have other methods at my disposal. Didn’t think I’d have to pull this on you, but you seem to be begging for your demise, so I might as well use it,” He grits his teeth, and holds one arm out, his forearm curling up.

A ball of black energy appears at his fist. It is nebulous and shifts as it grows bigger. It begins to glow as time passes, as it amasses more energy. You have no idea what that is, but you highly doubt your shield will be able to block it. As you think about your options, your shield begins to fade away – you are nearly out of cursed energy. You are wide-eyed as you watch the last sections of your shield dissipate to nothing.

Entirely defenseless, you heave yourself to a standing position and try to stumble away. You fall to one knee in agony – Jogo and Geto have taken a toll on you.

You look over to see the ball of darkness leave Geto’s fingers. You are frozen, knowing you can do nothing, but also knowing you will die if you do nothing.

It approaches, and you close your eyes. Hopefully it will completely destroy you in a single instant, so it won’t be torturous. At least you won’t be in pain for long.

It’s going to hit you. And then you suppose it does. You feel weightless, like you weigh nothing. Perhaps your body has been destroyed, and this is how your brain is processing the absence of your nerve endings.

But if you are not here anymore, why does the wind whip through your ears?

You were mistaken. You don’t just feel weightless, you are weightless.

When you open your eyes, tears spill out at the sight in front of you. Tousled white hair, a blindfold tucked over his eyes, rigid determination showing through his features.

“I didn’t know this is where we were holding the school reunion. Class of ‘007, except Geto went all rogue and didn’t end up graduating. What a failure!”

His words are playful, and he’s smiling, but somehow his tone doesn’t match. It’s serious and dark, not at all jocular. He seems to be making an effort to keep up his lighthearted persona, but his true feelings can’t help but bleed out.

“Ah, you finally showed up,” Geto cackles. “It’s not good to have a weakness. I was about to do you a favor.”

Gojo laughs bitterly, “Don’t you know? Strength comes from weaknesses. Not that you would understand.”

“In any case…” He looks down at you. “I won’t let you take away my strongest weakness.”

next part

a/n 2.0: Okay so, idk how it 100% is in the manga bc I haven’t read it, but basically this ‘Geto’ (*cough* Kenjaku) has thoughts that are Kenjaku but with some of Geto’s memories ?? .. sorry if that’s non canon heehee

Bonus!!: Also I’ve been learning some Japanese so here is Gojo’ name spelled out: ごじょさとる。This is more for my own enjoyment 🫣 but here you go lol

tag list: @thenyxsky, @whitehairedtwink, @screwyou3

also thank you @zoyatoshi for your such sweet reblogs 🥹🥹 literally inspired me to finish this chapter up after 6+ months !!

[astupidgaydog]

Intro Post (NEW)

I. About me;

Hello !! I’m so glad to be back on Tumblr once again !! Since you probably don’t remember my account I’ll give a short refresher. I used to have the user name “@//Thesilliestperson” and ran a pro-ship safe mood / stimboard account.

I was under a lot of stress at the time and had quite a lot on my mind. I kind of just deleted my account out of no where because I felt like I couldn’t balance doing requests while also doing a bunch of school work. I don’t know why my first thought was to delete it but, hey, that was quite a while ago.

I’m going to try to build my account from the ground up, so be prepared for me to be on here pretty much 24/7 !! ( I still have to go to work so not 24/7 but you get what I mean. ) Thank you all for being so patient even when I deleted my old account out of no where, lots of hugs and kisses !!

For those who don’t know me; I’m Silly / Silliest !! I go by all pronouns except for She / her and I hope you can respect that. I am 17 and strictly anti-harassment in all shapes and forms as I know how it feels to be bullied to your lowest point over stupid things. Even though this is a pro-ship stim / moodboard account, I am currently iffy about dark-ships, I will most likely be posting them in the near future because of other people’s requests though so don’t let that discourage you from sending dark-ship requests !! ( I also ship some myself, it just feels kind of iffy to me. )

II. Stim / Moodboards;

I allow pretty much anything. You name it, I’ll make it into a stim / moodboard for you. As you can see, I don’t really have many boundaries when it comes to requests. ( The only requests I do not allow are NSFW requests since I am still a minor and am extremely uncomfortable with making those things )

If you want to request something from me please do the following; Add the media source, character(s) you want featured in the board, and if you want to be @‘ed or not in the post. You can optionally add what color palettes you want the board to follow and what ever extra things your heart desires.

I try to be very fast when posting stim / moodboards but please be patient if I don’t do your request(s) immediately, I might have a long list of other requests in front of yours. If after a month or two yours hasn’t been done it either got buried under requests or didn’t go through. If that happened, please re-send the request with a short message that should look something like this; “Hey, I didn’t receive my board yet! It included; ( Insert request. )” I will try my best to do yours as soon as possible when I see that message.

If something’s wrong with your stim / moodboard don’t be afraid to tell me !! You can privately DM me the issue or just talk about it through the request box. I will almost immediately try my best to fix the issue I made with your board before doing any of the other requests. ( I will keep the original board up unless you request me to take it down before posting the fixed version. )

III. My F/O’s;

This is a list of my F/O’s ( Also known as ‘Fictional Others’ ) that I adore with all my heart. You may request stim / moodboards that include my F/O’s, I don’t mind sharing them with other people / characters at all !!

💚 = Romantic , ❤️ = Platonic , 💛 = Familial

☆ Cracklin (ION) 💚

★ Gelatin (BFB) 💚

☆ Aventurine (HSR) ❤️

★ Leafy (BFB) 💛

☆ Kankri (HS) 💚

★ Mituna (HS) ❤️

☆ Sylveon (PK) 💛

★ Vaporeon (PK) 💚

☆ Moon (FNAF) 💚

★ Sun (FNAF) 💚

☆ Master Frown (Unikitty) ❤️

I love my guys / gals so much !! more may be added in the future, I’ll see what I do.

IV. The End;

Thank you for reading my long ass intro, I just wanted to redo the one on my old account in the best way possible. I hope this was good enough way to feature everything I do !!

Anyways, I hope to do lots of boards for many different people in the future !! I’ll try my best to make good ( or decent at least) boards. I haven’t made one in a while so this will be the best start to remembering how to make them again !!

Again, thank you for being so patient with me, even through tough times, I greatly appreciate it you have no idea.

Lots of love,

Silly 🎉

[zundamind]

wow, would you look at that! it's been a full ass year since you fucked me over! september 29th.... yeahh..... XD our fuck-you-versary! hi clifford!

in case you dont remember, the name piko might jog your mind. yeah thats me!! hellwo!! honestly you shouldve known better than to stick with your old username but hey props on you for changing it last minute! almost didnt find you for a second lolll!!

i wanted to drop in and say HEY! HELLO! HI! and give you some status updates :3

update one: i'm getting better!! no thanks to you, of course. and actually i should say we're getting better. yep! thats what happens when you suffer so bad your brain cant take suffering solo! XD

update two: while my mental health has been at an all time low ever since you fucking dropped me like a fucking ROCK, ive been getting over things lately! my clean streaks are now longer than a week! i no longer want to kms! im even making friends again!

update three: while both of the above statements are true, you still live in my mind rent free. i remember when i first stumbled across your blog a few months ago, i had a full on spiral! not anymore, though. i am STEEL, BABY! also you spinning in the mental microwave rent free is why i'm sending you this heartfelt ask!

man.... even when i try, i still find you somehow and its never intentional. like imagine scrolling the tptm tag only to be straight up jumpscared by your ex best friend's username! how embarrassing!

also i'm sorry but i have to say the reason(s) you left are sooo fucking stupid..... what, cus i was weird? come on. everyones a little weird. even a little deviantart weird. oh and because of some stupid opinions that shouldntve even mattered if you were actually a friend? get real, trey. what if i left your ass because you had a fuckin biting kink? that wouldve been funny actually. like making a sad callout post on twitter thats just "my friend left me because i wasnt vanilla enough!" XDDD

oh, and if you ever see your "stalker" again, assuming you're not thinking its me and that its actually your previous qpr or whatever the fuck, say hi! i find it funny as FUCK, since, you know, you were considering cyberstalking me at one point. and tell chaos i said hi too. i'd also mention mayu, but do you two even keep in touch anymore? probably not, considering the weird things she's done.

anyways thats the end of my relay. if you dont want these kinds of asks again, i suggest either turning asks off or just straight up deleting your tumblr and/or making another one that is NOT connected to any username youve used in the past, because in that case i'll just find your ass again lmaooo. remember! every year on this day will be the day i remind you that you are NOT allowed to stay sane X3

sincerely, your most hated, piko. (i hardly use my old blog anymore, so have fun finding my current blog! and do what you want with this ask, make a callout post, scream into the ethers, reply to it, idc.)

this should stay private but idc

i know what i did was wrong piko! i was 12-13.

dont take this as me excusing myself. i had horrible emotional regulation back then, ive healed from everything back there. you dont deserve to be called out because ur like. 14-15.

do not bring mayu or chaos into this,weve all healed and forgot abt you.

i overreacted bc of very worthless things because i was basically obsessed witj you, you were my fp, if you didnt know.

completely forgot you even existed, i havent been checking your profiles at all in months. you shouldnt either, please forget about me. you'll drive yourself crazy.,

if you think im going to "cancel" you, no im not. for your sake, please dont interact with me anymore. i apologize for how i acted over stupid things, but we were both young and idiotic. im also a system, i dont even remember half of the things you did bc of that.

move on. ive moved on, weve all moved on.

dont bother yourself with me, you dont need to.

[qumiiiquinnquin]

im scared to tell my psychiatrist i tried to end myself twice within a month (sep-oct). i dont know why i am. i have to call the office myself since im an adult now, but im really scared making phonecalls. i have to do it because its been since april that ive seen my psychiatrist but i have to do it. i dont know when ill do it, im too scared. that fear frustrates my family a lot. i feel like im already a failure of an adult and will continue to be like that forever.

today was mostly good, just uneventful until this evening. but now im feeling depressed and i want to cry until i cant anymore, but i cant cry, so i just feel bad. i dont feel tired so i dont want to sleep, but its almost midnight so i should soon. im feeling stressed out about needing to call the psychiatrist's office, so i dont feel like i can relax at all.

ive just been feeling bad a lot lately but thats not new, i say think that to myself every other week or so. whats making me sad the most right now is hating my art. i dont have any confidence in my art but i want to get better, but i dont think i ever will. i will always have mediocre talent, no matter how hard i try. i keep thinking about burning my physical art and either deleting my digital art or just even destroying my laptop, though the latter is very excessive, but i still think about it every now and then out of frustration. i want to give up but i really dont know what else id do, ive always drawn since i was very little, its always made me happy. i really want to not care how upset stopping would make people, including myself, but if i dont stop out of just purely giving up, i probably will stop because i k!lled myself.

every day is feeling the same, it even felt that way when classes were still going. i got so used to the schedule that i got used to the systematic cycle. i partially dont want classes to start again because of that, its boring and the amount of work is stressful, im just going to go back to breaking down and nearly attempting from stress and lack of confidence that i can really do this, that i can really power through and get the degree i want. i keep getting told im smart and always work hard, but that really doesnt mean anything now. being and doing those things doesnt suddenly mean that because of those things, ill survive the stress. it only actually makes it worse, like im ridiculous for feeling the pressure and have the mental health collapses that i do because of college, that im not trying hard enough and am lazy.

for some reason the desire for love has been on my mind and i dont know why, youve seen the pathetic longing things i say about romance. right now i feel like i am missing out and am a failure by societal standards for not even have dated in my life, and i still dont have a partner at 18 years old. i feel extremely lonely to the point that seeing other couples makes me depressed, which is probably selfish of me. i feel like and believe now that i will always be alone. i know i am not beautiful to anyone, i know i am not funny, i am not interesting, im a pain in the ass, im too much to deal with and am just unlovable in general. i hate feeling this way, i never cared about romance or relationships and have always been repulsed at the idea of me ever being loved romantically or being in a relationship. i feel stupid. i feel like a jerk. i feel like i deserve to be alone forever, and i really do. or maybe, just end myself, if im so unlovable in every way, then why not just weed myself out? whoever takes my place will be much more worth it than i ever could be. its so stupid thinking about myself d*ing from a broken heart. "just grow up, sad excuse of a grown adult." (in quotes because its a direct thought to myself towards myself, nobody else)

i really doubt everything will get better, ive felt this same exact way for 3 years now. sad, burntout, stressed, like im nothing but a problem for my family, a burden and waste of time to be around or talk to or care about. i did attempt once in 2021 but failed, obviously im still alive. i really want to try again. im really scared of pain, so im trying to find the quickest way or the least painful option. if i just call, i can get different meds or a different dosage and i wont feel this terrible. im so childish for an adult to be unable to make a fucking phonecall. i feel like next year might be it, im not sure why i get that feeling, but i dont have any reason to keep going. im not looking forward to anything. nothing is really that fun or exciting, i just try to distract myself. i know im not wanted, and im too difficult for my family.

its now a half hour after midnight because im incapable of shutting the fuck up. i might just lay down and watch youtube or cry myself to sleep, whichever happens first

[valley-of-headcanons]

welcome to the valley of headcanons!

this is a blog dedicated to stardew valley headcanons and one-shots! everything you'll need is right here.

currently listening to ... the manuscript by taylor swift

request guidelines ... 🪩

-> if you send in a request while my inbox is closed, i'm just gonna delete it. it's kinda in my bio and in this post, so it's kinda obvious you may not have read everything ... it's not a huge deal but i've noticed it a lot recently. i love the support! it just gets a little overwhelming when i have 14 asks in my inbox 💀 sorry if this sounds rude! i just felt like it needed to be said, we all make mistakes sometimes <3

-> at the moment, i am only taking requests for bachelors and bachelorettes! those are the only characters i truly know in depth! i may open it up for others, but for now, there we go :)

-> i would much rather write for one or a few characters at a time! i do like the bachelor/bachelorette requests, but i feel like i'm allowed to write a lot more! i don't mind either, but that's what i prefer <3

• characters that i would love to write for: SAM AND SEBASTIAN ‼️ also alex and haley :)

• characters im not as enthusiastic about writing: shane and emily :/

• genres i write: fluff, angst, slice-of-life sort of stuff! or just general headcanons.

• genres i'm not comfortable with writing: fantasy, the supernatural, anything that's not realistic :( i know stardew has a lot of supernatural elements, but i don't believe i would write them well! sorry :(

• HARD NO'S: smut/lemon/lime, yandere, or anything like that! please refrain from asking, PLEASE!

• what i write: one shots and headcanons! please be specific with what you would like, or else i will choose!

of course, i can reject any request that i feel uncomfortable with, so you have been warned! please read carefully before requesting, thank you! <3

important posts ... 🌌

headcanon masterlist

oneshot masterlist

inbox ... ☄️

• bachelorettes with a sickly reader [wip]

• haley oneshot (sailor song by gigi perez) [wip]

• sam oneshot (malibu by mylie cyrus)

• harvey oneshot (invisible string by taylor swift <3)

• alex oneshot (good luck babe by chappel roan)

• sick farmer oneshot (haley or sebastian)

• sebastian oneshot (style by taylor swift)

• bachelors reacting to losing an arm wrestle headcanons

• harvey x male!farmer dealing with sa

• bachelors with farmer who owns a boutique

• shane oneshot (guilty as sin)

inbox: closed!

info about me ... 🩵

my name is anna, and ive started to develop a bit of a hyperfixation when it comes to stardew valley! when a new hyperfixation begins, you know what happens lol. i am pretty busy, i have a lot of stuff on my plate, so i will try to do requests quickly, but there is no guarantee! plus, motivation is sometimes few and far between.

i started playing the game in december 2022, and ive fallen in love with it ever since! currently i don't have a favorite, it's probably either sam, sebastian, or harvey :)

avatar was made using this website and ibis paint x!

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

diiary 2/25/2023

okayyy i been needing to write a longform post for a while! just to chronicle some thoughts in a cohesive way. & getting straight to the point: i'm realizing there is very little, if ANY payoff, to being an artist online. i'm not talking about money. im talking about the way it's like, the more ppl start to see you as an "artist", the more they feel like ur some kind of public figure they can lash out at w no repercussions. ur humanity is just wiped from their minds. i don't have some huge following by any means but for ME its gotten big since in the past i've been a serial deleter. usually at 800 followers im gone.

i love being creative & sharing for the sake of sharing but i deeply fear any kind of spotlight. since i came back onto tumblr i made the pledge to myself not to delete my account if it started growing but now im having second thoughts!! well i'll never delete this account cus im too sentimental but part of me just wants to stop posting in the ways i tend to do. like maube im too forthcoming & need to slink back into the shadows a bit. because i don't want to stop contributing art & music to the world but idk how to protect my heart.

like it's so crazy to me that artists are expected to b these idealistic icons of everything the viewer represents & if they make a single mistake its like fuck we better launch a pUBLIC HARASSMENT CAMPAIGN!! genuinely like, how are people supposed to want to put themselves out there when the climate is so hostile? it has got me feelin rly nihilistic i must admit. trying to put nice stuff into the world shld not be generating drama for me, especially when it's just my hobby & not even my "career".

for a while ive had no idea what to do for work or how to generate income in a way that works for me but honestly? im gonna bite the bullet & do some coding bootcamps so i can try n get a remote job doing some tech shit & making a fat salary. i guess i never rly considerd it before cus all the silicon valley stuff susses me out but idk. im naturally really good at code + my only real dream in life is to be able to support others & redistribute wealth. like ive never had anything of my own to share but if i could actually do this & become the secure+charitable person i wish to be, i think i cld finally have some inner peace/sense of fulfillment. plus i cld still be a recluse ^_^

ok well i guess that my diary entry for now. im rly grateful to everyone on this site who is genuine & respectful towards me. i am really enjoying all my creative projects right now & i just dont want it to ever stop being fun just because the internet doesnt want it to be fun for me. i seriously wonder why artists are the number one targets right now, i mean not to get too conspiratorial but like, this is exactly what the CIA wants :/ wahtever....i have no agenda other than plur. but yeah, i might just start to distance myself more from posting anything other than my work. we'll see. just kno that i dnt want it to b this way. ilu guys

[bonesandthebees]

Weird question and also no pressure to answer this at all!! But uhh i was wondering if like u and firesnap and all those ppl youve gone to lovejoy gigs were like irls or like... hm how do i phrase this

Ig what I'm trying to say is, how did you meetup safely with someone you met online?

Because I have someone I trust with my life, like I've literally given them . Probably too much information about me shfngkfk but the thought of meeting up with them, while i absolutely want to. So so badly. It's also... really scary now that im thinking about seriously?

Ive actually met up w someone online before and we did it super safely but that was bc they were already visiting close to where i lived so their plans didnt Rely on that. But this would be me flying to where they live, solely to meetup with them. And that thought is terrifying and . Yeah sorry if this is a weird ask shfkf i just thought that since youve (possibly?) done it before that it might be a good place to ask. But if this is like weird or too heavy or anything then uh dont answer!! Shfkgk help im so awkward at this and am maybe regretting this but im also literally not sure who else to ask so 😭😭

But also i recognize that ur literally just here for fic n stuff so i dont wanna put any pressure on u!!

Im so sorry if this made you uncomfy, pls just delete this from ur inbox if it did FHFJFK

this is a really good question, I don't mind answering it at all! I'd say when you're meeting up with an online friend irl, you have to consider specific details to figure out the safest way to go about it

firstly, if you're a minor you need to be extra cautious. this isn't to say you turn 18 and you're magically safe now, but as a minor you are much more likely to be targeted by creeps wanting to meet up with you irl.

when I've met internet friends irl, I've done it in a few different ways. by far the dumbest and riskiest way I ever met a friend that turned out fine but I look back at and cringe on was when I was 19 and I straight up just drove to a friend's house (she was 27 at the time for reference) when I found out she lived an hour away from me. I'd never met her in person before but we'd been talking for several months and I'd seen pictures of her, but just straight up going to a stranger's house was really stupid on my end. I sent the address to my mom before I left along with my friend's name and number so I took some precautions, but still that was very risky. it turned out totally fine and she's still a really close friend of mine to this day, but yeah uhh don't do that unless you're REALLY confident in whoever you're meeting up with

as for my more recent meetups, I met roxy eli and meri for the first time last year when we all agreed to go to twitchcon san diego together (though actually I'd met meri a month before bc they happened to be visiting a city close to me for a few days, so I drove over and picked them up at their airbnb and we got dinner it was very fun). for me I was the least at risk with twitchcon because I'm from southern california, so if things got weird I literally could've just driven home. it was more risky on roxy, eli, and meri's ends because they all had to fly out for the trip. it helped though that we were all staying at an airbnb instead of someone's house. we'd all seen plenty of pictures of each other at that point, and we were all in our 20s so I think that's why we all felt more comfortable with it as well, but no matter what meeting up with people you meet online carries a level of risk to it

firesnap was one of the least risky meetups I've done lol. she had an extra ticket to see lovejoy in NY, I already had been planning a trip to new york to visit a childhood friend of mine who lived there, so we just met up while I was over there. I stayed at my friend's place, firesnap had her own hotel, and we just met up at the lovejoy venue and hung out in the queue all day. that was easy because I had my own place I was staying at, firesnap her own place she was staying, we weren't relying on each other for any of that so if something had been weird we both would've been able to dip. so I was far less cautious with that one and didn't even see a picture of firesnap until literally the day before we met up

overall, I think if you want to fly out solely to meet a friend, you need to take a few steps to make sure you're safe. first off, see if you can do a video call with them at one point to confirm that your friend is really who they say they are. get their real name, phone number, and address and give it to someone you know so if things go wrong someone knows where you are. and when you fly out, make sure you have a backup plan to get out if things get weird. see if you have any family or friends you've already met in person that live nearby who can get you if things aren't feeling right, and if not, find a hotel near where your friend lives and make sure you have enough money to stay at it in case of an emergency. and if your phone has a tracking ability on it (like find my iphone) make sure someone you know has access to that. keep your irls updated on where you are and what you're doing, and if you're really paranoid, establish a safeword that you can text family or friends back home to let them know something has gone wrong and you need help.

I hope that helps! just take precautions and always make sure you have a way to get out if you need. communicate with people you know back home and have a plan in place with them so they can help you get out if you need. but I'm sure you'll have a good time. I've had a great time meeting up with online friends so I'm hoping you have the same luck!

[granulesofsand]

hello! im a system, and have been wondering if we may be a ramcoa survivor. id just like to preface this by saying this will likely be long as well as probably confusing, and to feel free to delete this or not respond if it's not something you're comfortable with. take care of yourselves above all else. ^^

also, apologies if i get anything wrong or say anything stupid, its not my intention to do so, and by no means am i an expert on this!

we're an osdd system, or at least think it's osdd. ive been researching ramcoa and programming and i think we may have gone through some of that. its quite hard to explain right now, especially since i don't want to overshare on anything or make anyone uncomfortable. but a decent amount of our experiences do align with those of programmed systems. im worried that i might just be convincing myself we can identify with the descriptions of certain programs or something. (i know that's confusing, my apologies)

it's hard to explain this and i know i was vague (i kept dissociating writing this and kept forgetting what i was getting at), but i hope that it makes at least some sense. if for any reason you wanna talk to me about this more, i don't mind sending a private message or another ask to you.

nevertheless, i hope you have a good day or night, and thank you for reading this!

Hello! The first part of this is your answer, the rest is boundaries for similar contact.

Answer

High levels of dissociation can present as lower level manifestations. I believe that any programmed system can call themselves Highly Complex.

I can’t say with this alone if your experiences are a result of programming, but they well might be. Please do reach out again, but also read the full post so we can communicate better.

Boundaries for asks:

I/we don’t live in your head like you do, and we will never be an authority on your internal workings. It’s okay if it’s not clear yet, or if you realize you came to the wrong conclusion.

It matters less what happened than how it affected you, and sometimes we can support you through that.

We are also traumatized. I’m still learning how to hold healthy interactions, and I don’t want to set a precedent that any of my system can always do so.

I like to talk to others with similar experiences. Not everyone in my system agrees, and we can’t respond well all the time. It may be a long while before we get back to you, and we cannot serve as emergency care.

We do try to say if something is too much or if we have to step away. We might not ever return a message, or only say that we cannot proceed.

If we do answer, we may be wrong. Maybe something true to one of us isn’t for you, and that’s fine. We appreciate others bringing up our mistakes, even if some of us are defensive.

With this information in mind, please do reach out to us. We only know how to answer asks publicly, so either use direct messaging or mark that you mean to speak in private. We can answer asks in separate posts if you don’t want your message widely available.

In short,

• Our opinions are not law

• Your experience takes priority

• We are far from perfect

• Responses may take time, no emergencies

• We might never respond

• We are fallible, mention our errors

• Use DMs or mention in asks for privacy

[goatlingsvent]

mm. I recently joined this new pet game, and honestly?? it changed my perspective a lot, on goatlings.

I don't know if I'll ever want to permanently quit goatlings, but.... idk. seeing firsthand, a similar game with a competent and genuinely friendly owner/ staff who're passionate and cherishes the playerbase, an actually welcoming playerbase, that is, and an actual fun game with events and new updates and actual progress being made towards advancing everything.... I'm kinda tired of goatlings, how it's run and the playerbase

I know it's generally agreed that comparing two similar things is kinda shitty, but like. gameplay on goatlings hasn't changed for a long time. no changes to make obtaining currency enjoyable, no work done on adding any events or gameplay beyond make goats and collect items, and the playerbase... its not all bad, but the bad really does outweigh the good. the money balancing is very... bad. it's too difficult to actually make a good amount of money, and when you do, you know you won't be able to make any of it back when it's spent. when it comes to currency, from the pov of a user, it should be balanced, where it still takes effort but isn't grindy.

and the playerbase.... yeesh. considering this blog exists... the goatlings playerbase is really quite unfriendly?? like, the few times I've tried talking in livechat comes to me when I think about the playerbase for this game. it was where a lot of people were chatting, but the second I sent a "hello" in chat, everyone went dead silent and eventually the chat started back up without anyone acknowledging me in the slightest. take in mind, I'd never interacted with these people, yet it was as if I had personally offended them just by trying to be there. yeah, I'm not entitled to interaction, but jeezus did that suck. especially since I have an anxiety disorder, which includes social anxiety. it felt like I was being personally ostracized, like I was an unwelcomed guest.

Ive had my fun moments, yeah, but trying to come back to goatlings... it doesn't seem like something I'll be doing in the foreseeable future, atleast for a while. I won't be deleting my account, but I won't be active at all for quite a long while. not even checking in every once in a while, like id been doing. who knows, maybe this'll be a goodbye to goatlings, maybe it won't!

🚃

[done-drinking]

Have i fucking ever given you a reason to think im a scumbag, think real fucking hard. After everything we went through, all the support, all the "love" and appreciation for eachother. I have been nothing but there for you. I have done nothing but try to be understanding towards you and patient. Sometimes we didnt communicate and it made things difficult, but was i a scumbag? Did i ever do anything to you or anyone to make you think i didnt try my best to be there or helpful or a good fucking person. I dont like drama, i dont hate anyone, i dont want to see anyone upset or angry, especially you. You deserve the fucking world, everyone does. So what the fuck happened man, what makes you think i was actually talking shit about you. Whos twisting my words or your mind and why was it so easy for you to disregard all ive been towards you over the past year. Best manager ive ever had and one of my best friends, you got me my job and ive been slowly recovering and pleased to be there. Now what, you think im so much of an asshole you guys banned me from the stores and were ready to press charges over something i said? What did i say, fucking call me and tell me. Cuz i dont fucking know. If you think i drunk talked to people i havent. I havent been drunk at work since you told me to never do it again, and that was when i was working for you. Drunk now? Drunk texting people at my job now? No, and no. Im about to go to work and be anxious about how everyone there probably thinks im a scumbag now, whole town probably lowkey thinks it because thats the kind of place it is. All regulars, lots of drama. If i wanted to make your life hell i couldve told everyone we fucking slept together, an obvious lie and we both know it but everyone else would question and talk about it. That would be a scumbag move. Would i? No, never, even now being as pissed off as i am. I respected your requests. The "dont text back, delete those posts, etc". I lied to him about kissing you, all of it to help try and keep your mental state okay while mine fucking broke. Ive only ever spoken highly of you at my job. Ive lied so much to the people asking why i quit working for you to save your image because i still fucking care about you. "I left because i didnt enjoy some of the people i worked with and it was just a stressful environment to work in, or just needed to feel like i was moving up in the world or needed a change of pace". You dont think im important anymore or am not a good person? Who are you. What the fuck happened to you man. We were good friends and you were so quick to toss me aside fucking multiple time. Getting past the "relationship" was a good reason to toss me aside. It def helped us both give up on that, but tossing aside our friendship like we didnt have one. Tossing me aside now, thinking ive just became an asshole in the past few weeks and am trying to shit on your life? Are you just saying all this to try and get past me or what idk man, if you are and care about me at all anymore then please fucking stop because youre hurting me even more. Like what the fuck man. Im so pissed off at you right now, and i should hate you but i just fucking cant and thats pissing me off even more. Forgive all my swearing to any christians reading this if anyone reads this at all, but i try to be a man of God and you know that too. So i forgive you for thinking im some cunt now. I forgive you for the emotional rollercoaster waiting for you to change was. You said you ruined my life, you didnt. You damaged me and broke me but i forgive you, im repairable. I still have my whole life ahead of me. I wasnt it, i wasnt enough, i wasnt the one, i wasnt important, everything you said i was, wasnt, even though you said you meant everything you say to me. Its all very clear to me now thank you. I forgive you. Youve really pissed me tf off though. Youve always wondered/wanted to see me get pissed off, well here it is, congrats you did it.

[chemicaljupiter]

for the longest time ive felt like i do not exist outside the perception of others, at least not in a way that matters. not in a philosophical way, it felt more like something ive been burdened with. i dont think im the prettiest person in the world and i dont think i have a great personality or anything like that but i have always deep down felt like i have something really important that i need to put out into the world. i dont know what it is but since i was a young teenager ive been working very hard and constantly creating art, videos, writings, music, edits, anything my mind comes up with just trying to figure out what that something is. ive been making youtube videos for most of my life at this point spent hundreds and hundreds of hours writing, filming, editing, coming up with complicated storylines and creative concepts i wanted to show in the videos i make. 99% of those videos have now been made private or unlisted so what was all that work for? i draw hundreds of drawings and i threw most of them away or painted over them. none of my writings ever saw the light of day and i have so many notebooks its hard to to even remember what ive written or where it is. why have i spent my whole life creating things that now cant even be perceived by others, by my definition these hundreds of videos and writings and drawings dont even exist so why did i spend all that time on it. i dont know. the funniest part i think is that i have switched accounts so many times that i have essentially ran away from any audience i possibly couldve built. i get 1-3 views on my yt videos and 0 likes on tumblr posts 12 likes on instagram on a good day and im not complaining that im not getting enough likes on instagram. i dont care, being instagram famous was never on my to do list, i just feel so defeated that i have spent my whole life trying to create something good, something with meaning, something thats could move people or at least entertain them for a few minutes and i have failed so completely at that goal that by my own definition i barely exist. this block of text doesnt mark any big change in what i do or how i do it. i will probably keep creating things as many and as often as i can, and i might even keep deleting them after a few months. i just pray that if i do it for long enough maybe i can eventually be proud of myself for it. maybe i can make myself happy if i cant make others happy. maybe someday ill die and someone will come along and watch my old videos and for a few hours i will exist again. maybe i can make that person happy and maybe i can entertain them for a few minutes. i dont know goodnight

[thedarkmistress16]

Do you have any app or mobile game to suggest? QwQ I wanna try playing something new

OOF there's so many mobile games I'm listing so prepare yourself

BATTLE CATS is the shit. Tough levels at points but there is a semblance of progress to be had. They added a lot of events and extra shit so it might be overwhelming for new people. i have no idea tho I barely started playing it again.

I'm a lover of the solitare genres (klondike and spider) but ugh the ads. I really only like them for the virtual customization of the themes that desktop comps dont provide enough of and having something offline to play on the go. ive been getting better at the four suit spider games, tho- i can feel my brain learning. 😁

Bingo games are fun! I don't have any one in particular I like the best, tho. Been a while since I played them.

Tinker Island 1 has great progression and you have the opportunity to collect the paid currency constantly, building up your gem vault. I like the garden minigame more than the actual gameplay XD.

I like Marvel Puzzle Quest for the match-3 gameplay with the marvel aesthetic. I'd recc. to play this one casually because progression is nonexistent with AND without $.

On the topic of match games, Bejeweled is a classic. 😊 I loved the butterfly rescue one back in the day and poker version was fun too- the tension is just MWAH.

Grand Summoners is for some reason spending a lot of money in ads because I'm seeing it everywhere despite having it on the exact device I'm seeing the ads on??? I'm not saying it's a problem it's just odd, lol. Micromanaging gear and teams will implode your brain but there is some strategy to it, even if you try to auto everything. They have crossover events all the time, on top of progression being kinda slow but still possible, and I'm quite happy with unexpectedly pulling a Hatsune Miku and evolving her. 😊

I would recc. trying out Yu-Gi-Oh Duel Links out for a test run to see if the grind is up your alley. Very generous with rarity tickets the last time I played it.

For another simple game, billiards are fun too, and easier to play digitally than in real life, lol. You will be playing against other humans all the time, tho.

Injustice 1 or 2 and Marvel Contest of Champions have their own pros and cons, but both are finger-input fighting/brawl games with IPs so it depends on asthetic and progression i guess? If I had to choose tho, I would say Injustice is more organized in its content than Champions if that makes any sense?

Best Fiends is a cute and neat lil' bubble draw and pop game that has some progression to it, but it's been a while since I played it. Surprising for me that I even like this one since the mascots are cartoony insects.

Color Puzzle is a gradient-building/color-matching puzzle game. I played it during my art class and it made me more aware of how colors react next to each other though it can hurt your eyes.

Visual novel story/chapter games are ones you need to curate yourself to figure out which one you'll want to sit through. Chapters has sexual/explicit stories but a beefy reward system compared to Choices from what I remember, plus community engagement/contests. This likely could have changed now- I haven't checked. Other apps have (slightly) animated characters/establishing shots and some are more customizable in the protagonist and reputation systems (romance or otherwise). They all blended together in my mind like a big soup of colors, but i will tell you that the paid currency choices are never worth it.

(Pixel) Color-by-number games are fun pastimes until they hurt your eyes and drain your device battery.

South Park Phone Destroyer was fun for a bit. Until it wasn't.

Dream Girlfriend is the best Ambition gacha/character simulation game they have, prove me wrong.

side note: have you ever played a mobile game that got deleted? one that was solely a play-to-win that was also fun in general and you were close to maxing out your characters? yeah, it's worse than the pain you feel when you discover your fave fic has been deleted from the internet😢

[shhhhhiminsidesaitamascloset]

Apologies, in short i started stealing anti post because some pages were doing it. Not thinking that this kinda goes against my principles and basic ethics, i left the two stolen post up.

after some reflection, i deleted both post. There were only two post i stole from antis. Theyre both gone. Any other f/o imagines post i have is originally made with me and my current f/o Saitama in mind. I admit i was kinda a d*** because antis use to be the bane of my existence.

But i do share similar beliefs with them. Im also a sex repulsed asexual. Technically demisexual if you count Saitama. But ever since i became a born again christian ive been trying to be on the straight and narrow. And reflect that in my social life online and irl. So i apologize. That was totally unchristian of me.

A lot of people arent quick to accept apologies or forgive and im prepared to get hate for it. Just try to listen to reason.

As someone who had their old tumblr previously lost to hacking spare me what i would have spared you. Its not that serious and was just a dumb attempt to make a statement. I hope we agree on that at least.

Just be the better person. Let us move on. Forgive each other and part ways. Thats all i ask. Im neither side because the discourse always gets messy. And i'll do better to lead by example.

I rather we be civil and given i deleted both stolen post i have no further issue with moving on. Just stop being hypocrites yourselves. And lets enjoy things we all like regardless of what we believe.

ty have a nice day. take care ✩

[gxnic]

general kento nanami headcanons

cw: gn! reader. there’s nsfw stuff but that’s separate from the sfw stuff

a/n: hey y’all, so this is my first *real* post here on tumblr. i’ve written fanfic b4 and have posted it before (albeit i’ve deleted everything i’ve ever posted fanfic wise) but i’ve never posted on tumblr! i wrote a small drabble and posted it to test the waters and that’s about it. since this is where i read most of my fanfic i figured lol why not writing is one of the casual hobbies i’ve always had anyways. about the headcanons, ive seen the jujutsu kaisen volume 0 movie three times already and it hasn’t even been out for a week, so i’m in a jujutsu kaisen writing mood. i have a nice one shot planned for both yuji and gojo (separately. obviously.) so if u want u can look forward to that, but for now i thought i’d start off lighter. hope u enjoy! :)

masterlist

sfw

ok so

starting off strong

coming from a plus size woman herself anybody who’s ever said nanami wouldn’t like a plus size partner is completely fucking wrong????

like omfg

he would love the feeling of your soft body in contrast up against his hard and rough muscles

this man definitely tries to live a healthy lifestyle. work out regularly, eat healthy, the whole shebang

however he’s the type of man who finds it extremely classy when somebody isn’t afraid to indulge in the simple pleasures of life

and he just wants u to be happy while doing it

don’t get me wrong he would encourage u to be healthier but when u ask if that was his way of trying to politely say you need to lose weight he would be genuinely flabbergasted bc no that’s not what he meant at all that thought literally never even crossed his mind he just wants you to be healthy and live a long life

doesn’t mean he won’t also indulge himself with u tho lmaoooo

like i feel like he acts all committed to this super strict diet and routine but in reality he doesn’t stick to it that often regardless of the fact he feels like he should bc life is short who cares? certainly not nanami

anyway pls never talk negatively abt ur body bc he will ask why it even matters every single time before complimenting u cause ain’t no way ur ever gonna talk badly abt urself and him just let it slide

long story short no matter what ur body looks like he thinks ur beautiful like weight ≠ beauty in his mind

anyway on a completely unrelated note

he snores lolllllll like rly loud

and he sweats in his sleep a lot too idc

it’s cute tho

blanket stealer too and when u guys wake up and u tell him he was hogging the blankets in his sleep he gets all embarrassed and won’t look u in the eye and denys it even tho he knows he does it he just can’t admit it

which usually isn’t that big of an issue cause y’all are glued together in your sleep anyways

cuddling alllll the time deadass

he always likes the air conditioning to be set pretty cold D:

like he’s definitely the kind of person who knows immediately if someone changes the temperature even one degree

he’s a good cook tooooo omg

for some reason i feel like he excels at italian food don’t ask me why i don’t know

like nanami would make the most fire pasta

but yeah he’s a good cook

he’s also rly flexible

i mean for the record think of what he has to do for his job of course he’s flexible

but he in particular is super flexible like he can do all that cool contortionist shit if he tried (which he won’t cause he’d be too embarrassed)

also he spoils u

like duh that much is obvious ofc nanami spoils his s/o but like….

yeah he totally spoils u.

he’s not really a religious dude tbh

like if ur religious that’s cool he’ll accept that he’s not gonna shame u and he’ll happily listen to u talk about it

but most of the time he’d just rather talk about something else

most of the time he’s just calling you by your first name but on the rare occasion when he does call u a pet name that’s when u know he’s feeling affectionate and wants ur attention

he doesn’t call u very many pet names either he’ll call you “sweetheart” the most, “beautiful” too and also maybe “darling” on the days he’s feeling extra affectionate

like it’s super easy to tell when he wants to just say f everything and be all over you

he doesn’t rly like pda so he’s super touchy at home

he likes to hug you from behind

his favorite cuddling positions either consist of him being the big spoon or him laying down on your chest

like i can see after a rly long day he wants nothing more than to come home get dressed comfortably and crash right on top of you laying his head in ur chest and putting his arms around you and feeling your hands through his hair

he would find the rhythm of your breathing and your heartbeat very comforting

especially after the horrors he’s forced to witness on a daily basis

you’re a comforting reminder that he’s alive

he’s just really obvious with how much he loves you

like even b4 y’all got together it was really obvious he thought he was super badass and hid it rly well tho LOLLL spoiler alert he didn’t

the thing that sold it the most pre your relationship was the way you’d always feel and catch his eyes glued to you

+++ it’s not easy to fluster nanami, but considering even the simplest of gestures from you turned his face and ears pink? yeah duh ofc he likes u

he tries to cover his face when he blushes too but he’s rly bad at it LOL like he’ll put his hand over his mouth and extend his thumb and fingers over his cheeks to try and hide the redness but it never works

like he’ll stay composed but his body’s reactions give it all away

hear me out i feel like he’d like a friendly talkative s/o

like maybe not somebody who’s as eccentric as gojo 24/7…

but definitely somebody who’s lively as long as they know when to be serious and is capable of remaining composed in a situation that calls for it

he would appreciate it to no end if you were able to get him to lighten up a little and be less of the stick-in-the-mud that he knows he is

he’s the slow dance with you in your kitchen in your pajamas type guy

but honestly no matter who u are

just one glance at u and he’s smiling to himself thinking abt how in love with u he is

you’re his biggest motivation, after all, and no matter how long the two of you are together you never stop giving him butterflies

nsfw

oof oof oof oof oof

oh to engage in the devils tango with this man

whenever mappa animates him loosening or taking off his tie it’s always so focused on and detailed like whatchu tryna say huh?

yeah he ties your wrists together with his tie lolllll

like ok listen

i don’t think he’s sex dungeon level kinky

but i also don’t think he’s completely vanilla either

he’ll blindfold u, tie ur wrists together, maybe your ankles if he’s rly feeling it

he can be reallyyyyyyy rough too

generally he tries to be gentle but if he’s ever really pent up or angry or frustrated abt something he wants to rid himself of that anger in a healthy way and sexual release is a go to for him

those are the circumstances where he’ll be rougher with u

he usually apologizes after though

and if u were the one to ask him to be rougher he’ll do so with pleasure but he’ll definitely still seek reassurance afterwards and ask you if what he did was to your satisfaction

he’s generally the more dominant one

he likes obedience

he’s okay with you taking the lead too but he prefers if it’s nothing too extreme

he feels bad asking u but god he loves getting sucked off so much :(<3 sweet baby

especially after work when he’s feeling especially exhausted and he’s had a bad day and he’s lazing around he loves nothing more than some good ass head and then cuddling to sleep

he’s a giver too don’t think anything less

he’s always between your thighs before he’s actually inside of you whether it’s his mouth or his fingers

he’s cool with using toys on you too, he actually really likes it

he doesn’t see sex toys as a threat he sees them as his best friend god healthy masculinity is so hot

u can use ur imagination to think about how he’d use them on u >:)

also nanami isn’t a one night stand guy

like hear me out i don’t think he sees sex as some crazy sacred act or anything

it won’t take all that long after you guys get together for him to be okay with dicking you down

but he doesn’t fuck anybody he’s not in a stable relationship with

meaning that, yeah, he isn’t a virgin, but he probably has some awkward first time story with somebody he slept with once and since then he’s only slept with one other person he was in a relationship with

like… he has experience, but not a lot of it

don’t get me wrong tho his stroke game is crazy

he 100% puts in the effort to figure out what you specifically like and don’t like

it’s definitely always a focus of his to first and foremost please you

he teases u but also praises u

like full on degradation? no not his style

but teasing yesssssss he loves it he loves seeing you squirm from just his words

like god just imagine his chest up against your back with his arms running down your sides and hips while he’s whispering teases into your neck goddddd i wish i wish

he also likes it when u scratch up his back hehe

he likes it when you leave marks on him and he leaves marks on you in places people can’t see

he doesn’t think it’s classy when people walk around with hickeys and such on full display however knowing he has marks/you have marks on your bodies that only the two of you know about is something that turns him on

also, if you’re fem bodied, he’s a hardcore tits man. i will die by this.

boobs in his face yesssssssss

[enamation]

Literally help me. I got an ask by an anon for a Tsukasa x Reader who also has a passion for music and bc i am EXTREMELY active on tumblr i started writing as soon as i got it and saved it to my drafts so i could finish it later right... its been a few hrs since then and i ACCIDENTALLY POSTED IT LIKE A SECOND AGO AND IVE NEVER EVER CLICKED DELETE SO QUICKLY. So for the lovely lil anon that asked for this, this is for you .

also im this close to calling my anons anonoculi... bye i need to log off genshin

IM ALSO GOING TO MAKE THIS A 25 FOLLOWER SPECIAL, ITS BEEN A WEEK AND A FEW DAYS SINCE IVE MADE THIS ACC AND IM ALR AT A QUARTER TO 100 LETS GOOO~!! I LOVE U ALL SM HELP WHAT

Type: Headcannons × Short Story

Warnings: None !!

Proofread?: Uhm no im doing this instead of schoolwork . . .

Ten-message: i dont know if this is slightly ooc or not . . .

❥ TSUKASA TENMA x Reader: My Muse

- TSUKASA TENMA HAVING AN S/O W A PASSION FOR MUSIC?? bye bro is in heaven

- You and him LOVE to talk about musicals and music videos and how he can improve W×S' performances, and hes really happy to be able to talk to someone who understands

- Definitely has multiple shared playlists w you focused on different genres (just incase ur in the mood for sum different)

- Yes, you will be featured sometimes on wxs performances. If you dont like performing infront of people, you all have fun singing backstage like no one is watching

- Sharing earbuds !! When you guys are sharing earbuds and youre doing something, he likes to come up to you and hug you from behind and sway as we whispers along to the song

- Always ends up with you two slow dancing somehow

SHORT STORY UTC !!

You had come over to Tsukasa's house for the evening, wanting to show him a new artist you had found. You excitedly sat on his bed grasping your phone as he closed the room door and glanced over at you with a smile filled with love, before walking over and sitting next to you.

You quickly typed on your phone, searching for the artist to have him listen to a few songs. This artists' inspiration is also for people to smile, so you thought he would like this artist since they have the same goal in mind. As Tsukasa listens to the songs, he is quiet for the first minute or two, listening carefully. You can't help the cheesy grin that soon appears on your face as he sways along, eventually getting up and dancing.

He pulls you up with him and you guys move and dance along to the beat. Soon enough, everything seems to fade out except him, both of your laughs, and the music in the background. You really enjoyed these moments with him as you both could bond and laugh and sing and not give a care about anything else in the world temporarily. You both fall in unison on the bed, chests rising and falling quickly as you try to catch your breath. He still can't help but giggle at the redness of both of your cheeks, and the happy sounds of your laughter.

❝ Moments like these are amazing to share with you. Thank you for being here, my muse. ❞