#ive always thought this with the show dark it is in my opinion the greatest show of all time and gifsets now get like 400 notes at best

[demadogs]

i genuinely dont understand how gifsets and fanart get tens of thousands of notes the first month the media releases but a few months later it just gets a couple hundred. this isnt even about wanting more notes i just cannot believe you guys are moving on so fucking fast. its one thing if its a goofy sitcom thats not that serious but i have seen some of the most incredible, intellectual, truly life changing prices of art over the years and posts about them would get 40k notes right after release and maybe 200 max just six months later. how the fuck are you not thinking about it anymore. i will think about it for the rest of my life.

[numinous-void]

disclaimer: this is the first comic project ive ever done. i welcome constructive criticism though!

it’s mostly a comic, but each one will have little written blurbs. like a half fic, half comic!

CANNIBAL STARS ARC 1: HELLO STARS!

CHAPTER 1: DEAL!

New York City 1921.

Hidden under Lady Bloom’s Book Store is perhaps one of the most ritzy speakeasies around, lush, extravagant, flashy and swimming in snobs, celebrities, and rising stars. In turn, this makes for the greatest hub for foraging a name and connection with others. Whether or not bridges are built or burns depends on the mind of the player. A striving theatre actress and bold clothing designer, Rosalia reclines on a dark brown leather couch with a glass of red wine and tells herself it’s to loosen up before she gets on stage. Truthfully, she earns some extra income by performing at night as a flapper as her fiery and boisterously proud attitude gets her glares from potential scouters- not to mention her unconventional appearance of strawberry blonde and red hair and tall stature can make her a hard sell, not meeting the typical vision for a woman. She scoffs at every glare and remark. She knows she should lower her head to achieve her goals but she’s much too proud to let herself get treated any less than how she feels she deserves.

Her recent move from Boston, Massachusetts down to New York has proved beneficial- and many more men are less willing to fight with her as she’s sure there’s no shortage of women like herself there. Perhaps tiring men was a hobby of hers.

For the past 2 weeks in Lady Bloom’s Bookstore, she’s been making quite the name for herself as a flapper- but someone’s name she doesn’t know, someone’s name she absolutely wants to know, sits at the bar. He never seems to drink too heavily- sometimes he seems to drink water or nothing at all. He seems to have quite the tall stature but Rosalia is almost certain she will dwarf the man as that occurs as many times as the sun sets and rises.

She swirls the wine around in the glass cup, not quite as beautiful as the red color of blood but perhaps that could be fixed should someone lack decorum. Mimzy, who honestly serves as the manager for the speak easy as she’s always there to perform, approaches her. They always appreciate a good gossip session.

“My dear Missy Mimz, what your opinion,” Rosalia asks with a quirked brow without giving time for a proper hello,

She continues, “on Mr. loner there?”

Mimzy swivels her head around to follow Rosalia’s gaze.

“Hah! Thats Alastor… Ya gonna take a crack at ‘em?” Mimzy teases.

Rosie is almost taken aback. Not in any offensive manner, however it was odd to hear as she has been able to charm any man, should they be they object of her desire.

“Am I that obvious?” Rosie curiously asks, Mimzy gives a giggle.

“Nah! Ya’d just be damned if you thought YOU’RE the first one.”

“Ack- what? He some lounge lizard?” Rosie asks.

“Haha! You’re killing me, hon. He’s quite the opposite. Al only ever shows up alone and leave alone. 100$ ya can’t break em!” Mimzy challenges.

Rosalia feigns hurt, scoffs and playfully rolls her eyes.

The pair move from the couch, rising from their playful little deal. Rosie being the confident individual she is has zero doubt in her ability to win. She had been able to woo any man she wished to, that is until Rosies fiery flam of an attitude never settle. Rosie dusts her dress, ready to change and doll herself up for the night…

thank you for getting to this point if you have🥲🥹

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

i want to ask for help. but i cant tell when would be a good time. because u've said before that therapy doesnt work unless YOU want it to, and i dont know WHEN i will want to. i just know that ive been feeling like this for as long as i can remember and that if i dont do SOMETHING about it, i might not even live.

i feel like im scared to ask for help because what if? what if i actually do better? i cant imagine living without thinking about dying every second. there is a scary sense of comfort in it, but its familiar and its me but its ME and i dont want it like that.

i,,, i dont know why this is going to you, but i do know i admire your opinions and i guess i just want to know. when. when does it get better.

When... hmm, as Yoongi has said before, these kinds of feelings are like seasons. I don't personally think they ever "go away" - you have good times and bad times, sometimes with reason, sometimes for no reason at all. At least, that's how it is with me. Going to put the rest under a break.

"Get better" is a vague term. You can argue you're already "getting better" because you recognize something needs to change, but that doesn't really feel statisfying because you're still in the same mental state, right? Then, is "getting better" a generalized state of more happiness? Could be. But, if you've always been in the darkness, well, shit, how are you supposed to know the light is the light? You've never seen it before. Then, does "getting better" mean... being like everyone else around me that seems like they're "good"?

That's the greatest lie of all.

I've said therapy doesn't work unless you want it to, not because you need to feel a certain measure of desire to change, but because you can't walk in there thinking the therapist is going to change you. If you have the means to try, you should to to therapy and just try it, because knowing you need to do something indicates that you already want to change. Reaching out to someone, stranger or not, already indicates you don't want to be like this forever. It might work, it might not. Therapy really depends on the therapist and finding a good fit is very difficult.

I'm going to tell you a bit about my journey. I have no idea if it will help you, but maybe you're interested.

I grew up not knowing love. My parents had an arranged marriage and, in their case, they did not love each other. Probably still don't. They're still married. I guess they tolerate each other, I don't know. In any case, it was very dysfunctional. I didn't know anything about maintaining healthy relationships, showing affection, or the value of people. I was seen as a means to an end, not really as their child. It was mostly my mom, but my dad was neglectful and wasn't really part of my life even though he was there the entire time. Because of this, I didn't value myself. I became very depressed and, if you've read my work, there's hints of what I've done to myself. I thought about dying. A lot. All the time. Planned it, dreamed it, wished for it.

Then, I moved out and entered the next phase of my life. Made a shit ton of mistakes. Destroyed friendships, had a ton of questionable relationships, chased love that was never there, fell apart. I was an "adult" but I was still the same - still wanted off this fucking Earth. But there was a difference. This time, I finally realized something.

These had be been my desicions.

My choices put me in that position. Nobody made me do anything. I was being self-destructive because I wanted to. And just like how I put myself there, I could take myself out.

So I did.

Not easily, mind you, but I did. I switched my surroundings again, put myself among people who had my best interests in mind, found my close friends, had a great time. Did shit everyone else did, went on cute dates, hung out with friends, traveled a lot, took pictures of delicious food, had an Instagram life.

Hated it.

I wasn't myself. I had pushed down my past and pretended like that shit wasn't real. I had a good life, so I'm good, right? I'm cured! I have what everyone else wants - I do what I want, have a good job and loving people around me. Yeah, no. I was "better", but I wasn't better. Far from it. I used to draw, write, create. In this phase I did none of that. I felt empty. But I was happy! Shit, what else can I do?

And then I discovered BTS.

Music does a lot of things. In my life, they defined the phases of my life. Rock and metal saved me from ending it when I was stuck in the darkness. In the time of empty happiness, I listened to music, but nothing stuck. I did, however, broaden my horizons and listen to everything, finally learning that all music has its merits and that I could find something I liked in nearly every genre.

However, I wasn't committing to anything, and that was because I couldn't commit to myself.

At first when I listened to BTS, I thought they were really cool. I went from era to era, mostly listening to title songs. Then I was bored and listened to their other stuff. I was curious about the lyrics I liked. They were usually rapped by this one guy, and I learned to recognize his voice and wait for his parts, because they always ended up being my favorite.

Yeah, just guess who it is. :)

I thought, well shit, I have no idea what he's saying. I should look it up. Went to look up the lyric translations of their songs, finding SUGA's parts and yet another epiphany.

Why am I pretending?

I'm reading these lyrics and I'm like, shit. This is it. This is me. These are all thoughts I've thought and they're here. They're real. Someone else thought them in the same way I have. And I am, indeed, still feeling these things, but pretending I'm not. Pretending it's impossible to acknowledge the person I am, that teenager wondering why I have to live when I could just fucking not, and who I've become, an adult with no sense of self but happy, and how they somehow can't coexist even though they already do. They're all me.

It wasn't very fun facing those feelings again, but I did it because I needed it. I needed to work through them and stop pretending so I could be myself. And now I am, because I can see it. You can see it. I create, not for anyone, but because this is me.

Maybe a little hypersexual. Kind of insane. Borderline cocky (but I am hot though, I'm just saying). I write, I draw, I create, I have fun, I cry, fuck, I do it all (swallow dick real fucking well too!). I do everything I want to and live how I want to.

This is just one way, one life among billions. You might not go though this (technically, you're already on the BTS phase, you know) and most likely your journey will be different. Because "getting better" is a personal thing. It is what you want in life, who you want to be, and I didn't know who I wanted to be until I lived though all kinds of shit, learning about other people's lives, and found someone who let me know, hey, you can brush past or you can soak into a heart. Change will always happen. You can live however you like. In some ways, you grow up and become an adult. In some ways, you stay the same, always young, always learning, always growing up. Sometimes people give up their young self because they think they have to. And maybe they do. You don't really have to though. You only have to be open to the idea there is also comfort in other things, that the you that you've known all your life is not the only you that will be.

To live a full life is to have many things, not physically, but mentally - memories, thoughts, past, present, whatever you want to hold on to, hold on to. No one can take them away from you. You will become more than just that. Every day, you will wake up to a new self that encompasses all your other selves before that. If you're impatient and want it now, run. Read up on things, surround yourself with all kinds of people, try activities you've always wanted to try, experience shit and find out what you like, what you hate, what you can modify to suit you better.

Find out what it means for you to get better and you'll discover, hey.

You're already there.

[ryuby]

Happy 90th birthday John Williams!!

To pay a tribute to this greatest composer among composers, here my own top 90 (maybe, under construction, cause you know, it’s quite long to organize and write down, and, above all, I’m a lazy lazy boy).

1. Welcome to Jurassic Park (from “Jurassic Park”): from the very beginning, with the piano, this piece sums up the power of his music. I’ve not grown up with the film, but when I saw it for the first time, maybe two years ago, I got immediately struck by a deep sensation of nostalgia, as though I always knew this fantastic prehistoric adventure in my heart. That’s the effect this peculiar ost still has on me, memories I do recognize as being recently fabricated but with the strong warmth of a kind of eternal inner truth that was waiting for its awakening through a sensitive, musical experience.

2. Call of the Crystal (from “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull”): I’ve never understood the mainstream hatred this film still provokes, even though it tends to be more balanced nowadays. I mean, yes there is extraterrestrial with UFO, but, meh, don’t remember the Lost Ark that contains fate spirits who actually kills nazis? On a very accurate disturbing music. This is clearly not a relevant point to bash the film, it goes the same for its music. Williams was way more inspired in 2009 than for the last Trilogy of Star Wars. This theme proves it. It perfectly depicts the deep mystery that’s surrounding the so-called Crystal Skull, the repetition of string motif, the crescendo led in two parts with a central wind reflection that could represents Irina Spalko herself, the high pitch voice that emerges in the middle, all this features contributes to display the eerie atmosphere we bathe all through the film. The scene with Spalko in the tent shows us the greatest danger about an unknown unlimited power is always mankind itself: her fanatic totalitarian speech spouses the gloomy fascination this music provoked in our innermost feelings and thoughts. Finally, ain’t it the power of music itself, this limitless ancient power that is to be wielded with infinite precaution? But, eh, nothing to worry about, John totally tames the beast!

3. Star of Bethlehem (Orchestra Version, from “Home Alone”): perfect depiction of the magic atmosphere Willams masters in films that are family-friendly, plus some epic moments whose accents may evoke scores form Indiana Jones and foreshadow Star Wars III, in my very humble opinion.

4. The Next Morning / Mom Returns and Finale (from “Home Alone”): the sweet leitmotif that accompanies the reunion of the mother and his son never fails to make me melt like chocolate.

5. Adventures on Earth (from “E.T., the Extra-Terrestrial”): the spontaneity of strings spouses this unforgettable story that inhabits dreams of all little boy, in their age as well as in their mind!

6. Imperial Starfleet Deployed / City In the Clouds (from “Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back”): first apparence of Star Wars in the list, hurray! I’ve discovered a genuine preference for the ost of this film. For long time it was rather the IV’s. But here we have the demonstration of a brillant narration through music, first the imminent danger of the landing on Bespin with low and dark themes, and then the sublime contemplation of the magnificent city hanged in the sky personified by a brief voice of soprano. It is the first time Willams uses such a tremendous instrument, the human voice, 1980. And he not generally relies on it in his further compositions, but when he decides to do so, what an event, what a blissful delight! We know Holst plays an important role in William’s score, for example the sharp notes of “Mars, the Bringer of War” in the introduction of the IV, but here we have a more subtle reference, I think, to “Neptune, the Mystic” with the women choir that emerges and sings ethereal waves until the end of the piece, like a far far away echo going further and further in the distant space, maybe it finally manages to reach Neptune, who knows?

7. The Battle of Hoth (from “Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back”): along with Battle of Yavin and Battle of Endor, from IV and VI, that immediately come after this one, this is an impressive large-scale musical sequence with the remarkable intervention of the piano in the middle that confirms he creates a one of a kind style in the V, compared to the two others.

8. The Battle of Yavin (from “Star Wars IV: A New Hope”): we can clearly hear the peplum spirit in this one, large brass sections, epic themes that ever go till the final victory, the sharp notes come back at the end with the destruction of the Death Star, which achieves a cycle opened in the introduction by the same notes. Brillant narration, again.

9. The Battle of Endor II (from “Star Wars VI: The Return of Jedi”): this one contains undoubtedly the most thrilling twist of events of the whole cinema history. The uphill battle that pits good against evil trough the Emperor’a theme plays by brass and the tremendous male choir that seems to emerge form the very depths of darkness to intimidate characters and spectators as well as it gives an brief but convincing impression of a man, the Emperor, who embodies a very ancient and everlasting source of demise and corruption. Always chilled when I listen to it!

10. The Temple of Doom (from “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom”): first of all, reminder that this film was extraordinary violent and explicit for that time, 1984, and for that type of entertainment, a rather family-friendly aventure franchise, moreover with Spielberg as director. Before the release of the fourth film in 2009, this one was the less appreciated of the whole trilogy. Personally, it’s my favorite for its more “realistic” background around the Thugs who actually existed in India until the 20th century, and who actually worshiped Kali through killing contracts, since they were a sect of assassins. History sceneries, antagonists and music of course, this film is unfairly underrated to me. This peculiar composition plays during the most terrific scene that causes the creation of the PG-13 rating, along the Gremlins the same year. Here John relies on percussions and tribal choirs which represents the hectic frenzy of the Thugs attending a sacrificial ceremony during which a heart is to be ripped off a prisoner before he gets merged into lava to burn alive. The rythme and crescendo of the singing follows the progressive horror both the powerless spectators and the protagonists are witnessing till the accomplishment of the unspeakable. The disturbing feminine sounding voice at the very end could be the word of Kali herself, word that gets reinforced by the collective chanting vowels going up louder and louder, as though there was no physical nor moral limit in this cathartic, dangerous assessment of existence.

[infinitelytheheartexpands]

My Personal Opinions on Some French Grand Opéras

Here we go. I’ll be focusing solely on pieces in what’s widely considered the “Golden Age” of grand opéra (from 1828 to about 1870).

1828, Auber: La muette de Portici: never seen or heard so I cannot comment, but I do think it slaps that it helped start both the Belgian Revolution and the genre of grand opéra.

1829, Rossini: Guillaume Tell: I love this one. it’s one of the few grand opéras that has a happy ending and it’s fully deserved. it’s long but it all has a point-- the first act introduces us to the community spirit that drives the rest of the action; even though it’s called Guillaume Tell, it’s not just about Guillaume Tell. it’s about a whole movement coming together, with all these vividly-drawn people of different social statuses, ages, heritages, and livelihoods coming together to do good in the world in the face of oppression. also it’s Rossini so it bops start to finish. the finale is one of opera’s best. I could not have higher praise and admiration for this piece.

1831, Meyerbeer: Robert le diable: another rare case of a grand opéra with a happy ending, but it feels a bit more contrived, something I wrote about when I watched it about a year ago for the first time. it’s quite a clever ending, however, and I love that these lovely characters get a happy ending. Robert is the least interesting principal character both musically and dramatically; the musical highlights of the show are mostly Bertram and Isabelle’s big scenes. the former is also arguably grand opéra’s most exciting ballet sequence, the Act III ballet of the nuns (or as I like to call it, the Zombie Nun Ballet). it’s long but it is incredibly worth it. overall, I really do enjoy this opera although it is very much an uneven piece.

1833, Auber: Gustave III, ou le bal masqué: here’s a thing I wrote about it like 3 months ago and I stand by every word.

1835, Halévy: La juive: It’s damn near impossible to find an even remotely close to complete recording. However, what the recordings have is excellent. The score is marvelous all the way through, although for the most part I tend to prefer the ensembles to the arias (the exception, of course, being Éléazar’s 11 o’clock number). Speaking of Éléazar, he’s an extremely complicated and frankly uncomfortable character, toeing the line between being one of opera’s most complex characters, an even more complicated proto-gender-swapped-Azucena if you will, and being an unfortunate vessel of antisemitic stereotypes. This is made even more complicated because Halévy was an assimilated Jewish composer. On the whole, Rachel is the only wholly sympathetic character in the piece, although all five of the principals are lovingly scored. 

1836, Meyerbeer: Les Huguenots: *holds things in because otherwise I would write an entire essay about this opera and you all know that because I have done that several times* Both a great strength and a great weakness of this piece is its sheer wide-ranging-ness, particularly in terms of mood. Unlike, say, La juive, this opera does not have one overall mood, instead steadily progressing from bright, brilliant comedy to one of the most horrifying endings in opera. Dramatically, this is great for the most part, although the sheer amount of exposition in the first two acts may take getting used to. Just as the drama gets more intense and concentrated as the opera goes on, the music gets more intense- and frankly, more often than not better- as the opera goes on. The window/misunderstood engagement business is something I still struggle to see the exact dramatic purpose of, because I think the question of religious difference would likely be enough to separate Raoul and Valentine at the beginning anyway; to me, it feels like Scribe and Deschamps were struggling to find a way to integrate Nevers into the story, as he is crucial to the opera’s lessons about love and tolerance, so they stuck in a quasi-love-triangle in order to justify his presence earlier on. (Also, for goodness sake, could you at least have given him an onstage death scene?) Anyway, in this way the story can be a bit unwieldy and uneven at first, but stay the course with this one...and even a lot of the first couple of acts are wonderful. The characters are all wonderfully written if rather episodic in many cases, but this opera is ambitious and by the end, it’ll tear your heart to shreds. It’s amazing. Uneven, yes, but amazing nonetheless, and I will defend it to the death.

1840, Donizetti: La favorite: I’m not as familiar with La favorite as with some of the others on this list (I’ve seen two different productions once each and I have a recording of it saved to my Spotify library that I listen to bits and pieces of very occasionally) but I do think it’s an excellent piece overall. LÉONOR DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER. The music is lovely all around; I know Donizetti wrote at least one other grand opéra in full and part of another, both of which I need to check out because in its own way, Donizetti’s style works wonderfully with grand opéra.

1841: Halévy, La reine de Chypre: here is a post I wrote about La reine de Chypre. basically all my thoughts remain the same except I have to add: Halévy as a whole just needs more love. there’s a few other of his operas I have waiting (a recording of Le dilettante d’Avignon that has been sitting in my Spotify for who knows how long and a film of Clari with Bartoli and Osborn I’m also sitting on) but there are so many pieces that sound fascinating but have basically ZILCH in terms of recordings.

1849, Meyerbeer: Le prophète: before I say anything else about this opera, I need to ask a burning question: WHY THE HELL IS THERE ONLY ONE GOOD VIDEO RECORDING OF THIS OPERA?!?! on the one hand, I adore the Osborn/Aldrich/Fomina production; on the other, I would also like other productions, please. anyway, I said one time in the opera Discord that while Les Huguenots will probably always be my favorite Meyerbeer opera for an array of reasons, this one is definitely Meyerbeer, Scribe, and Deschamps’ strongest work. it is both unusually dark and unusually believable for an opera of its time—and the fact that it still holds up so well is disturbing to say the least. this opera thrives on complexity in all forms and yet has probably (and paradoxically) the simplest plot to follow of the four Meyerbeer grand opéras. the score is brilliant start to finish, mixing the best of bel canto, Romanticism, and something altogether darker, stranger, and more original. definitely one of the most underrated operas ever. the aforementioned production is on YouTube with French subtitles; give it a watch here.

1855, Verdi: Les vêpres siciliennes: Vêpres is an opera I love dearly although I have yet to find a production that is completely satisfying. I think it’s because this opera is a lot deeper, a lot more complex, and a lot more troubling, frankly, than people are willing to go. also it should be performed bilingually and I am dead-set on this: the dissonance of an opera about French capture of Italian land being sung entirely in either French or Italian is always a little off at least (and also part of the reason why my brain probably adjusted to hearing this opera in either language better than, say, Don Carlos). but anyway, neither side comes off particularly well here, particularly due to the violence and sexual assault on both sides of the equation: both Montfort and Procida are heavily in the wrong, and while Verdi sympathizes with both for personal reasons (Verdian Dad in the former case, Italian Liberator in the latter), there is a lot of troubling stuff in here. nevertheless, the music bops, the story is intriguing, and I think we can all agree that Henri and Hélène both deserved better, especially considering how close they got to bliss (although I think we can also all agree that the end of Act IV twist to almost-rom-com is pretty abrupt).

1863 (full opera: 1890), Berlioz: Les Troyens: I wrote this review of Troyens after watching it in the Châtelet 2003 production in December 2019 (first time ever watching it) and I still stand by just about every word. Such a fascinating opera, great adaptation of the first few books of the Aeneid, marvelous score (of course, it’s Berlioz!)...but could there be a ballet or two fewer, Berlioz? Or at least shorten them up? And that’s coming from someone who likes ballet. But anyway, in every other respect it’s absolutely marvelous. Some people say it’s the greatest French opera ever, and while I hesitate to say that, it comes pretty damn near close.

1865, Meyerbeer: L’Africaine (Vasco de Gama): Vasco da Gama/L’Africaine is even more troubling—much more troubling—of an opera than Vêpres to me and I wrote a whole thing here as to why. I still stand by most of it, although upon reflection, I feel like the ending that drove me so crazy has virtually the exact same idea behind it as the end of Troyens/Book IV of the Aeneid: empire has consequences and those consequences hurt real people, who, though different and not among those perceived as “heroic”, are worthy of being treated as human, not being collateral damage. (I’ve written at least two essays about this for different classes, both specifically in regards to the Aeneid.) It may be time to revisit this one. The score is lovely, after all, although it didn’t stand out to me as much as others by Meyerbeer.

1867, Verdi: Don Carlos: *holds myself back from writing a 10-page essay* y’all, there is a reason that when someone asks me what my favorite opera is, I always choose this one even though I’m horrible at favorites questions. it’s Verdi, grand opéra, romantic drama (SO MUCH romantic drama and SO MUCH gay), political drama, religious/social struggle, personal struggle, social commentary, spectacle, intimacy, masterful characterization all in one. what more could you want? I first saw/heard this opera in Italian long before I did in French, so my brain is more hardwired to hearing the Italian but both are good. my motto is “Italian or French, I don’t care, but Fontainebleau has to be there.” fuck the four-act version. I mean, I will watch four-act versions but five-act versions are just superior. I’d prefer uncut performances (the first part of the garden, the Lacrimosa, the extended opening and ending), but these aren’t dealbreakers for me. it’s the perfect synthesis of Verdi and grand opéra, much less unwieldy than Vêpres (as much I love that one), both musically and dramatically.

1868, Thomas: Hamlet: Part of me wishes this was more faithful to the actual source play (why??? the??? fuck??? does??? Hamlet??? live??? although there are alternate endings), but part of me also realizes that the play is already four hours long as is and singing it plus ballet would make it WAY too fucking long. This does a pretty respectable job. The music is gorgeous, by turns almost sugary-sweet and thrillingly ominous. The Murder of Gonzago scene is an absolute masterpiece. The Mad Scene is justifiably one of opera’s best (although I’m not sure it was a good idea to have that and a frequently-cut 20-minute ballet with no relation whatsoever to the main plot to make up all of Act IV). There are a lot of bops in this one. The four principals are closely followed and still very well-drawn. Both of the stagings I have seen were excellent. An underrated opera.

1869 (grand opéra version), Gounod: Faust: Another of my absolute favorite operas. Since this existed for a decade before its transformation into the grand opéra we all know and love, I won’t comment much about its actual format and adherence to grand opéra tropes aside from saying the Walpurgisnacht ballet is one of grand opéra’s best and extremely good at giving off Vibes TM. I used to hate how the character of Faust was written and thought he was incredibly boring. Not anymore (although of course, I still hate him as a person. fuck him tbh). This opera has a reputation for being saccharine and old-fashioned and I think that’s a bunch of garbage right there. It’s about the search for eternal youth and the expectations of conforming to social values and people’s struggles with themselves when a) they “fall short” and b) when the world ostracizes them for being “different” and “out of line”. I am also firmly convinced that Marguerite is the real protagonist of Faust (like how I’m convinced that Valentine is the protagonist of Les Huguenots if there even is a singular protagonist in that opera but I digress). The music slaps. People need to stop cutting whole scenes out of this. I’m still undecided on the order of the church and square scenes of Act IV. Marguerite and Siébel just need everything good in this world.

Anyway, those are my two cents! I tried to keep these pretty short, so if y’all want any follow-ups, let me know!

[anileahvictoria]

Adam Kendall from My Little House on the Prairie.

Cutie Mark: Adam has always had a fascination with law and thought about becoming a lawyer many times, but ultimately decides he could do more good as a teacher for the blind. His cutie mark was inspired by the saying that justice is blind, so the scales of justice represent balancing his love for the study of law with his responsibilities as a teacher, and husband, and the cloth is Lady Justice’s eye covering that makes her blind, just like Adam is.

I accidentally referred to Little House on the Prairie as My Little House on the Prairie, and this fan art was born. More on that later, It's time for a rant. Adam is my favorite character from the series until I got mad and left the fandom cause they did this beautiful man dirty, so It’s time to rant about it.

#1. The Romance. The romance between Mary and adam was totally out of the blue. When Merry goes blind, she's shipped off to blind school, and her teacher is this capable, intelligent and hard-working young man named Adam Kendal. His teaching still is very much tough love, and he doesn't take crap from his students. Mary starts as a reluctant, uncooperative, self-pitying, closed-minded student doing things like throwing her things across the room. Adam handles all this brilliantly, saying stuff like: if you're gonna make a mess, your gonna clean it up. Doesn't baby her or pitty her AT ALL. Exactly what she needs. After a few months, Mary's attitude changes drastically, and she's thriving thanks to Adam. But when Adam sits her down to teach her some piano, she has a moment of self-doubt: 

Merry: I could never learn...

Adam: I wish you would forget about that. Some of the greatest writers and composers in the worl were blind.Have you ever heard of John Milton? 

Merry: Well of course. He- he wrote Paradise Lost, one of my favorite books.

Adam: Well, he was also blind. Now, do you want to play the piano or not?

Merry: There wouldn't be enough time. You know my family's coming to take me home. They'll be here in a few days.

Adam: It's been a long time, hasn't it, since you've seen your folks?

Merry: It seems like a lifetime. Adam, I'm so scared. I mean... I know I'm ready to go home... But here it's- it's easy, and I've always got you to help me.

Adam: Merry, you can't depend on me forever. And I'll be leaving too. 

Merry: Where are you going?

Adam: To Winoka, to start a new blind school.

Merry: Why didn't you tell me?

Adam: I don't know. It just never came up. 

Merry: Then I'm glad I'm going home.

Adam: Merry, it's not that much different out there. Not really.

And now it gets all angsty:

Merry: Yes, it is. I wouldn't expect you to understand. How could you? 

Adam: Mary...

Mary: The world isn't like the Burton school for the blind. It... It's a huge, dark place filled with... hidden obstacles and... strange sounds and voices coming from faceless people. Even you. I've never even seen you. 

Adam: Well then look at me. 

... And then they start feeling each other's faces and, correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure blind people don't actually do that...

And then it gets randomly and weirdly romantic...

Mary: What color are your eyes?

Adam: Blue.

Mary: Your hair?

Adam: Brown.

Mary: Thank you Adam.

Adam: ...What do you look like, Mary? Ive never seen you either.

Aaaand more face touching.

So apparently, they're a thing now. I'd understand if Adam fell for her cause she looks like a literal angel (seriously, no girl has any business looking that gorgeous), but Adam's blind too. So he's going ultimately off of personality, I'm guessing. And when he first meets Mary, she is not a pleasant person. Yes, she does improve quite a lot, but what makes her any different than all the other students he's taught? It certainly isn't their age, cause Adam's 22 and Mary's 15 (back then, I guess it wasn't a big deal). Also, It creeps me way out that her teacher falls in love with her. The man who spends most hours of the day alone with a vulnerable teenage girl falls in love with said girl AND THEN asks said girl to work for him at his new school in a busy city away from her family where it would just be Adam, Mary, one old man who lives on the top floor, and a few students, not to mention Mary would also be spending the nights there... It's a good thing this isn't that kinda show cause there's a million different ways that could've gone... But because this is Little House on the Prairie, nothing happens, and Adam asks Mary to be his wife soon after she moves in.

#2. Regaining his Sight And Becoming a Lawyer.

This really makes me mad. When Adam gets his sight back and sees the faces of all his friends and, most importantly, his wife for the first time. It's beautiful and wonderful and heaven knows the man deserves a miracle like that, BUT his whole character changes. He goes from a responsible teacher and loving husband who knows who he is and where he's meant to be, to an ambitious young man who would rather chase his dreams of becoming a lawyer than take care of his responsibilities to the school he started, the children he teaches, and the wife he loves. I can understand wanting to go and see the world and do things you couldn't do before, but sighted or blind, he has responsibilities. Mary is kinda left in the dust when Adam makes all these new sighted friends and drags her along to all his fancy lawyer parties while he plays games, runs around laughing and talking, and leaves Mary sitting in a chair all by herself. Like, he doesn't even consider how she must be feeling! He doesn't try to include her in conversations or introduce her to his new friends; she's just a pretty thing that sits there to be cared for. And the thing is, this is exactly what Adam was afraid would happen to him when Mary thought her sight was returning a few episodes ago! Now Adam's new fancy friends get him an opportunity to take some fancy tests to become a lawyer and Adam, without a second thought for Mary, goes off to take the test, not evening considering who would run the school if he passed and became a lawyer. Then some bad stuff happens, and he can't make it to the test, and I'm all relieved cause we all know he belongs with his wife teaching at the school and now he'll see things clearly and get his head off the cloud and onto the here and now. But nooooo, this whole time Mary is hoping he'd fail (and so am I), but when she sees how heartbroken he is, she goes and has a talk with the professor and convinces him to let Adam take the test. He finally relents, and Adam passes and becomes a lawyer, giving the school away to a wonderful woman who teaches there. This whole thing is treated like he made the right choice when he obviously isn't! Not I blame this on the time period the show was made in. Back then, a man had to be ambitious and provide for the family and leave the teaching and such to the woman, so back then, it was a good thing he went off and became a lawyer, but still, I'm mad. Correct me if I'm wrong, but when Adam hands the school over to the lady, Mary no longer teaches there, which means that Adam has taken away Mary's dream of teaching on top of not spending nearly as much time as he used to with her and (though he doesn't realize it and I don't think anyone brings it to his attention cause men are supposed" to do all the work) doesn't let her do things for herself.

#3. He's Fictional.

This one makes me the madest. At first, I turned a blind eye to all these flaws cause I assumed Adam Kendall was based off an actual person, like most characters in the series, but noooo. They made him up just for the tv series. This means his romance with Mary WAS totally random, and Mary staying in the same building as he did BEFORE they were married WAS the writer's choice, and Adam regaining his sight and leaving his wife and school in the dust WAS ALSO THE WRITERS CHOICE! AND he was basically just made to me Mary's husband because Mary doesn't marry or have children in real life. So yeah, my favorite character's development went down the drain. But oh well, that's what we have fanfic and fanart for, am I right? Oh wait, this show is old. No one's made any good fanart/fanfic. K, I'm gonna go cry now. Bye

Also, if anyone has a different opinion or point of view, please tell me about it. I'd love to go back to loving this character, so please change my mind 🥺. 

[itsleah728]

Perfect~ Julian x Reader

A/n: PLEASE READ! Hello everyone, I took a bit of a break for the holidays and such. I also have been quite down in the dumps, I get sad over dumb things like getting a zit or not liking what I create. I wanted to write this story to show that no matter what you do or how you look you’re not alone and there is someone waiting out there for you. That person may either be a friend or a lover but either way you’ll never be alone. Now I’m only young and haven’t truly experienced life yet, I’ve never even been in love only minor crushes but that’s a different story. Anyways I also wanted to write this because I wanted to try getting my love for life back you know? I haven’t even been creating art lately which is horrible because I love making art. Well if you read that whole thing thank you but it’s fine if you didn’t. Now onto the actual story which may be shorter than normal.

READERS POV. (1st person) I know I normally do 2nd person but I didn’t want to say “you” knowing that not everyone is experiencing things like this.

WARNING: This story shows self esteem issues and a fear of being alone!

Julian has been out working for a while now, which for me is never a good thing. Being alone leaves me with only my thoughts, my thoughts happen to be mostly negative. Ive never told Julian about what I fear or what I think because I never want to be a burden to him. He deserves someone who can brighten a room and cheer others up, not someone sad and insecure. People have told me not to be so sad over small things that can’t be helped but it’s harder than some people choose to think. In my opinion being happy is something you have to earn or something that you gain. Most of the time I silently cry myself to sleep praying that I don’t wake Julian. Night time is when my thoughts keep me awake, consistently telling me horrible things that deep down I know aren’t true.

Julian has been working for hours now and my breath slowly starts to shorten as the hours go by. A fear or being alone is what I have had sense I was young. I grew up being scared and stressed that I’ll get older and be alone but then I found Julian. He is always by my side and only leaves when he has to work, I don’t mean to sound clingy either but right when he leaves I get scared that he won’t come back. I could never tell him to stay home either because his job makes him happy and no matter what my fears say I won’t take away his happiness.

My fear for loneliness decreased as I got older and met more people but the reasons for my fear never went away. I’m so deep into my thoughts that I don’t even notice the door creaking open. I don’t snap out of my own head until I hear Julians voice speak up from behind me. “Darling, are you okay?” I jump in the air at the words suddenly spoken. I turn around to see Julian staring at me with a worried expression sketched across his face. I give him my best fake smile and pray he doesn’t ask anymore questions because I may just over flow. “Julian I’m doing great how was work?” Julian clearly doesn’t buy it but he continues on with the conversation non the less. I know he’s going to ask about it later though.

We continue on speaking about Julians work day until late that night when we decide to finally go to sleep. The sun decided to no longer shine and gave the moon its time. The light glow of the moon illuminates Julians handsome features as he wearily glances at me from the corner of his eye. He probably think I notice but he’s never been the stealthy kind.

He stares for a while more until his filter finally cracks, “Darling are you positive you’re feeling well?” I debate on telling him anything when all of my fears and negative thoughts start creeping in. I involuntarily let out a saddened whimper which puts Julian on high alert. He stares shocked towards my shaking frame until he he seemingly snaps out of it and gives me a bone crushing hug. He whispers kind words into my ear as I break down and start sobbing.

Julian eventually calms me down until I’m able to speak when he asks “tell me what’s bothering you please!” His voice is begging me to tell him what’s on my mind and I answer before I can even think about it. “Would you ever leave me?” I finally speak the one question that’s been tainting my mind all my life, I ponder for a moment and realize how stupid it sounds. I’m about to take it back when Julian almost screams “never would I ever even think about leaving you love, now what brought on these foolish thoughts?” “I-I I’ve always had t-these horrible thoughts, I w-was just scared one d-day you’ll d-decide to l-leave me” I manage to stutter out while holding back another round of tears.

I calm myself before speaking again, trying to explain why I feel the way I feel in greater detail. “I have always felt ugly, whether it be because I have blemishes or I’m too fat/skinny (either of these can be a reason for someone to be upset so I wanted to include both) I have never really liked myself so I put on fake confidence and try going with the flow.” I don’t dare look up at Julian as I take another breath to continue. “I have also always had a fear of being alone, I thought I would grow up and everyone would think I’m ugly or no fun and would just leave me. I sometimes get scared when you go to work that you’ll never come back.” By the time I’m done I am holding my breath and tears back.

All is silent before two arms wrap tightly around me. I feel wetness drop onto my shoulder as I realize I have made Julian cry. I gasp as tears start falling even harder than before. I then wrap my arms around Julian even tighter than his are around me.

We sit like this for a moment before Julian pulls back and wipes his eyes. “Darling I would never leave you and if you felt all of these things why haven’t you told me?” I sheepishly look away before responding with “I didn’t want to be a burden to you because you deserve better than that.” Julians jaw drops and he seems to get tense until he whispers “love, you are the greatest thing to ever happen to me. I love you too much to ever even consider leaving you.” I feel like crying again but manage to hold back as I mumble “thank you.” Julian slightly smiles my way and he slams me into his chest once again. He kisses my head as a wave of sleepiness washes over me, probably from crying so many tears. Julian lightly pushes me against the bed and says “rest now darling we can speak more about this in the morning.” I mumble a incoherent response as my fatigue decides to completely wash over me. The last thing I notice is Julian squishing me against his tall frame and me thinking ‘I’ll never be alone’ before the darkness takes over.

SORRY FOR THE KINDA SAD CHAPTER BUT I THINK IT HAD TO BE DONE FOR ME TO FEEL REMOTELY BETTER.

Check out my Instagram @its.leahs.art

[ladylooter]

ladylooter’s guide to watching Lupin III

I was inspired by @despairfiles​‘ guide to watching the Fate series as well as mutuals who have expressed interest in interacting with my Fujiko muse but were either completely unfamiliar with the Lupin III franchise or hadn’t seen any of the shows/movies/OVAs/TV specials in awhile. So I’m going to use this post to share my recommendations of where Lupin fans (and soon-to-be fans!) can start with the franchise. I’ll make a note first: these opinions are my own and there’s no ‘correct’ way to watch the various anime offerings. Some Lupin fans may disagree with me, and that’s great! Personally, I think there’s something in the Lupin fandom for every fan to enjoy, depending on your tastes. This is just my personal recommendation, based on the vast (seriously, a lot) of Lupin I’ve watched over the years.

But first, the basics:

Lupin the Third (often stylized as Lupin III) began as a manga in the 1960s by creator Monkey Punch. It spawned a media franchise featuring the manga, two pilot films, six television series, countless movies/OVAs/TV specials, video games, live action movies, a CG movie, and more. It stars Arsene Lupin III, the grandson of the original Arsene Lupin, who is considered the world’s greatest thief. He often teams up with the likes of Daisuke Jigen (expert marksman), Goemon Ishikawa XIII (expert swordsman), and on occasion, Fujiko Mine (expert seductress and betrayer). The four (though mostly Lupin), are constantly pursued by Inspector Zenigata of Interpol, who will stop at nothing to apprehend Lupin III.

A note about this guide: While the thoughts are my own, none of the images are. I tried to pull photos that represent the various recommendations I give here.

Where to watch: I’ll always advise to find legal copies of Lupin III shows and films. With so much content, there’s a variety of ways to watch. If you’re in the United States or have access to US-based streaming services, I’d recommend checking Hulu (Lupin III Part II is on there still, I believe) and Crunchyroll (Lupin III Parts I, II, III, IV and V are there). Movies and The Woman Called Fujiko Mine are a little more difficult to find nowadays, but you can often find out of print Funimation discs on secondhand sites as well as a variety of licensed Lupin movies from Discotek. But if you have your own means to track down content, I’m not going to judge you. 

Onto the guide!

Part I - I’m completely new to Lupin III…

...And I only want to watch one movie to see if I like it!

If you only want to commit to one movie, I’d recommend choosing Lupin III Episode 0: The First Contact. Lupin as a franchise has negative continuity, so there’s multiple ways the cast meets and interacts with one another. First Contact does this in a very succinct fashion while not losing a lot of the more traditional, common Lupin tropes. You’ll be introduced to the main five characters, see some heists, and get an idea of what the franchise is (mostly) about. 

In short, the plot revolves around a story Daisuke Jigen retells to a reporter about how Lupin and the gang first met. The main five members of the cast are also supplemented by interesting side characters (who aren’t just there to be plot devices. This happens a lot in the Lupin franchise unfortunately). 

I really liked this! What do I watch next? Almost any of the movies/OVAs/TV specials you want, as well as Part II or Part IV. If you don’t mind a darker take on Lupin or with more questionable plots, then Part I or The Woman Called Fujiko Mine could be for you. But I’d suggest Parts II or IV if you want to watch a TV series.

...And I want to watch a few episodes! I love humor, wacky hijinks, and don’t mind older animation.

Look no further than Lupin III Part II! This Lupin series is what you may remember being broadcast on Adult Swim in the early 2000s. It consists of 155 episodes and aired between 1977-1980. But don’t worry, you do not need to watch all of them, or even watch them in order! Most plotlines are contained to one episode, so you can skip around and watch what you’d like. The content is light, most everything is focused around crime capers, and there’s a lot of humor and pop culture references (well, pop culture for the late 70s). Episodes 145 and 155 are particularly highly regarded as they were directed by pre-Studio Ghibli Hayao Miyazaki. 

In short, the best way to figure out which episodes to watch are to read the titles or see thumbnails and see if it interests you. Or you can watch from the beginning, but that’s a lot of anime to go through!

I really liked this! What do I watch next? I’d recommend the two following movies: The Mystery of Mamo and The Castle of Cagliostro. Mamo was Lupin III’s first feature film and is a bit darker and mature in tone than Lupin III Part II (as well as some rough animation), but the plot is fantastic. Cagliostro is a classic, and Hayao Miyazaki’s first feature film. It’s just a great movie in general and has one of the best car chases in cinematic history. My only advice for Cagliostro? Know that the Lupin gang (especially Lupin and Fujiko) are far nicer and altruistic than their portrayals in other Lupin media. Watch it with the mindset of it being a Miyazaki/Studio Ghibli take on Lupin and being very family-friendly.

...And I want to watch a few episodes! I love heists and capers, but I prefer more contemporary animation.

You can’t go wrong with Lupin III Part IV! Also known as “The Italian Adventure,” this series takes place mostly in Italy and San Marino. It opens with Lupin’s marriage (yes, marriage) to Rebecca Rossellini, a wealthy heiress who has way more fun being a thief. It aired in 2015 in Japan and 2017 on Adult Swim’s Toonami block in the United States. 

It has plenty lighthearted moments similar to Part II, but unlike Part II it does need to be watched in full. Some episodes are self-contained capers but there is an overarching story that spans the entire season. Luckily, it’s only 26 episodes. The animation is stunning, the main cast is very much reminiscent of the gang Lupin fans know and love, and Part IV also has the addition of a more consistent female member of the cast other than Fujiko in Rebecca (and the two play off each other rather hilariously!). 

I really liked this! What do I watch next? You could watch the TV special Lupin III: The Italian Game, but a good amount of the film will rehash content from Part IV. Instead, I’d recommend watching Lupin III Part V. Taking place mostly in France, it’s the natural successor to Part IV. While you don’t see much of Rebecca, you do get another female member of the main cast named Ami. Part V also recently aired on Adult Swim’s Toonami block in 2019.

...And I want to watch a few episodes! I want to start at the very beginning to see how the characters have evolved and changed over time (and I don’t mind older animation).

Then you should start with Lupin III Part I.  Originally broadcast in 1971-1972, it’s one of the interpretations that’s closer to the original manga. It was the first anime series in Japan with a mature feel and aimed at an adult audience, so don’t be surprised if there’s a bit more lewd humor and violence. There’s a lot more sinister organizations for the gang to rob and far less of an emphasis on the happy, upbeat Lupin portrayal that’s found in later installments.

I really liked this! What should I watch next? Lupin III: The Fuma Conspiracy. It still features green jacket (Part I, when it was released) Lupin and is overall a good movie. The Japanese dub of this will be a little jarring if you’ve watched other subtitled Lupin: the entire voice cast was changed for this specific movie only. Otherwise, I’d recommend checking out Lupin III Part II or The Woman Called Fujiko Mine.  

Part II - I’m a returning fan to Lupin III...

...And I want to see a darker, grittier Lupin gang.

The Woman Called Fujiko Mine. You will not get a darker, gritter take on the Lupin franchise in anime than The Woman Called Fujiko Mine. Tone and design are very close to the original manga and it’s the only series that has Fujiko as the main character (I’m also a bit biased: this is one of my favorite contributions to the franchise). The 13 episode series details how Fujiko met Lupin, Jigen, Goemon, and Zenigata (gotta love the Negative Continuity!), and the various missions she undertakes while she tries to outrun her past. 

You’ll get some very different characterizations for some of the main cast (especially Zenigata) and as the series is much more dark and adult in nature, it has copious amounts of nudity (mostly for Fujiko. She’s completely naked for the entire opening credits), drugs, alcohol, smoking, and implied sex (among other things that would be considered spoilers). 

Literally. I cannot stress the nudity, drugs, and sex aspects enough for this show. It’s also the only entry into the Lupin III franchise to be directed by a woman. I’d say that if you’re a fan of Cowboy Bebop and Samurai Champloo, you’ll likely enjoy this addition to the franchise.

I really liked this! What do I watch next? You’ll want to watch the trio of films meant to follow TWCFM and have a similar art style: Jigen’s Gravestone, Goemon’s Blood Spray, and Fujiko’s Lie. None of them necessarily reference the series, but they have similar tone and design and are meant as spinoffs/continuations. They’re all relatively short films (an hour or less). If you’re already pretty familiar with Lupin, don’t miss the shoutout to The Mystery of Mamo in Jigen’s Gravestone. 

...And I want to see some great heists and overall fun that reminds me of Lupin III Part II!

Scroll up and see everything I wrote for Lupin III Part IV: The Italian Adventure. :) If you haven’t watched Lupin in awhile but love the red jacket era Lupin, you’ll want to start on Part IV. It has nicer animation with a similar feel. 

...And I want to watch some movies/OVAs/Specials! What do you recommend?

Beyond everything already recommended on this list? There’s a lot of movies out there, but here are some of my favorites:

Generally good story/art contributions to the Lupin III franchise:

Tokyo Crisis

Dead or Alive (This was directed by Monkey Punch himself!)

Voyage to Danger

Island of Assassins

Alcatraz Connection

Green vs. Red (this one is good for fans who’ve seen quite a bit of the franchise already. It was made to celebrate Lupin’s 40th anniversary)

The Travels of Marco Polo ~Another Page~

Lupin III: The First (The newest addition and the first CGI Lupin III movie! It’s coming to theaters in the USA shortly and will arrive on blu-ray in January 2021)

So bad they’re good at times:

Farewell to Nostradamus (I’m biased towards this one for a reason. Also, the opening sequence is great)

The Columbus Files: Fujiko’s Unlucky Days (Look I’m here for amnesiac Fujiko and I admit it)

Dragon of Doom (Great if you like Goemon, a little basic otherwise)

So there you have it. I hope you enjoy getting into Lupin III!

[allyvampirelass29]

When Good Fathers Take BAD Roads

When Good Fathers Take BAD Roads A NOS4A2 Review By: Allyssa J. Watkins

The Wraith screams, racing breakneck with demon speed A wicked black flash, gone and there like smoke Ferrying passengers three, wearing the faces of ghosts What shadows chase you, Charlie, accompanied by those you love the most? Are you going to kill your darlings On this, the Road of No Return? Tires squeal and rubber burns A pathway forms more nightmare than real A knife ripping through reality, tearing at the tragic seam The road to Christmasland is paved in screams Your daughter transformed, while you ignore your wife's haunting cry Hold on, Good Father, for the ride of your life.

HOLY SMASH, and MERRY FREAKING CHRISTMAS!!!!! "Good Father," was the ride, the MIND TRIP of my LIFE, as chilling, as it was thrilling, screaming unyielding into the drastic extreme, blinding light, and drowning darkness, happy and horrible, beautiful, and brutal, and it was a ride I only just barely survived. This is me, breathing heavy, adrenaline pumping, my legs giving out, kissing the ground, and yet, I have never felt this conflicted, torn up inside, about anything I've ever seen, drawn transfixed to the effervescence, the beckoning dream, and yet eviscerated by the looming, blood-dripping grin of the abject HORROR. What the HELL just happened!?

Okay, breathe, Ally...... So much to say, and yet my mind is a trembling mess of disparity, driven in the Wraith to the edge of madness itself!!! First off, can we just marvel at the enigmatic force, the sheer brilliance, and other worldly acting prowess that is possessed by our Mister Zachary Quinto!?!? I am CONVINCED he is an actual Strong Creative, and has graciously drawn us all in, in order to witness him build his inscape, and speak actual MAGIC!!! Besides being a catastrophic kind of handsome, the dark allure that you long to destroy you, striking your eyes, and stealing your heart, making you his happy, breathless victim, Zachary shifts effortlessly between dream and nightmare, being beautiful and terrifying, waltzing between both, with a passion that will leave you shell-shocked.

This episode is so hard to analyze, because it possesses both the brightest, happiest, most achingly euphoric scenes of the series, while also the creeping, darkest hours I have ever known. It begins like a splashy, champagne, Downton Daydream, Our Beloved Charles, delighting and igniting our passions, with his adorable antics, donning a pair of matchstick fangs, and we all heave a lovesick sigh, longing so to be the girl in his arms, that he's playfully pretending to bite. You will ALWAYS be My Nosferatu....... I whispered it along with her, watching the joy pierce through the calm dark of those perfect eyes, and all I want is to be her, his wife, Mrs. Manx. I was so excited, so impressed by this coy wink to NOS4A2's own parent material, the original 1922 silent film, “Nosferatu,” upon which our mad fever fantasy is based, that I broke into the biggest grin, shaking my head at the pure genius of it. Charles' distaste for the picture, and scoffing opinion, mocking it, calling it ridiculous, was a pure, tongue in cheek, joy, and I'm still trembling from when he said, "Love Bite." Ooooh, and the scene in the bedroom was so intimate and beautiful, as Charlie and Cassie share their dreams for the future, along with a dance and a passionate kiss, as some wonderous news is revealed. The family Manx is to become three, with a little sugar plum named Millie!!!

I wept when Charles held his daughter for the first time, as I realized THIS is where his obsession with Christmas began, as he received the greatest gift of them all. Every time he "saves," a new child, he gets to feel it all over again, in the glow of the coloured lights, and the tinkling bells of the music, what it's like to be a father, and to be loved, unconditionally by a child. He gazes at her with the purest, most profound love, even while his Father in Law, treats him perfectly horrid, openly degrades him, and yes, in one heart-stopping moment calls him a vampire!!! I was SPEECHLESS!!! His bond with his daughter is so powerful, and endearing, I sobbed, the most joyous tears ever I have shed, watching him tuck his beautiful little girl into bed, and soothe her fears in the flash of a lightning strike, both of them carefully constructing Christmasland in their minds, never knowing they would find it beyond the realm of lost dreams. I felt so happy I thought I could die, so moved by this tender scene, so oblivious as to what lay in wait......... as we twisted slowly around the corner.........

It was jarring enough, flashing between these idyllic Currier and Ives scenes, all luminous oil paintings come to life, to Charlie's decaying, autopsied, Frankenstein creature, shuffling, groaning, bleeding, through the living world. And yet, that was rather interesting, the ghastly contrast between Charlie's wonderful life, and the re-animated husk of his gruesome death. I especially loved his joyride in the stolen zebra print car!!! That was hilarious!!! However, the turn that I knew was coming, that I dreaded, was far more stomach-churning, and desperately frustrating than I could have ever prepared myself for.

Again, Zachary's acting was mesmerizing, every expression, every wild look in his eye, was so beautifully, and breathlessly performed, but for me, it was the writing itself, that went screaming off the rails. Charlie goes from the perfect husband, the most charming, and doting father, to difficult, suspicious, and accusing, for seemingly no reason at all. The way he spoke about his first wife in Parnassus, I expected to see her become the begrudging, bitter ball and chain he made her out clearly to be. But Cassie's sins are few and far between, and her punishments, and especially her disturbingly MORBID end, are unjustified. She tries to be practical by asking Charlie very politely if she should get a job, to which Charlie responds with unprovoked venom, with the same malice as if she'd revealed she'd been unfaithful. Thus begins, this odd new trend of Charlie continuously overreacting, entirely out of character, and blaming Cassie for everything going so wrong, actively wanting to hurt her, even selling off her mother's priceless heirlooms. My head hurt, my heart broke, and my GOD something was rotten in Christmasland!!! I realized then, that this whole episode has the faintest cyanide taste of audience manipulation.

"Good Father," seems to serve the single and sole purpose of turning the audience against Charlie Manx, and I could feel the force of the plot, trying to shift my mind in that unnatural direction. I could see the clever scheme at work, the writing on the wall, as they must have thought....... They love him too much........ Let's give Charlie his BITE back. Let's take this beautifully unique, nuanced, wounded, enigmatic, anti-hero, and make them love him even more, show him in all the tenderness, and affection they have so long craved, let them fall in love with him all over again, and then........ let's make them hate him, see that he is beyond saving, the incarnation of the purest evil. Let's ruin him, and that's how we'll ruin them. WHY!? This is the question that has kept me up in relentless frustration all week. WHY spend all this time, crafting this fascinating, deliciously intricate character, learning the pains and joys and hopes of his life, just to laugh it off, and say, oh no, Charlie Manx is a monster, and you're wrong for liking him!? To them I say, "If loving Charlie Manx is wrong....... I don't wanna be right." Because in spite of the blood curdling atrocities, and my tearful horror in the face of such plot, I can't not LOVE Charlie Manx.

What I have always loved about NOS4A2, is the way it flirts with the elements of horror, skirting teasingly around the sharp edge without fully going there. The final scene however screams full speed ahead into that sickening foray, and I was left trembling, terrified, sobbing stricken with just that. HORROR.

"Charlie, STOP, you're going to kill us all!!!"

"On that, My Dear, we are agreed."

While I was confused as to whether it was his intent to kill them all, drunkenly crashing his Wraith, or if he knew what terror would transpire on the way to Christmasland, this was a ride none of them were coming back from. Its gut-wrenching, frightening images, are matched only by its lack of even a semblance of sense. Charlie watches, excitedly, as his darling daughter's teeth fall out in a bloody display, absorbing her youth, her lifeforce, transforming her into a soulless vampire, and he doesn't so much as bat one of his gorgeous eyelashes, as his child kills and feasts on her mother's flesh. Yeah, I know........ MORBID. I was also bewildered as to how the car turned Charlie into a vampire of youth, and Millie into one of blood. Also, call me crazy, but....... Does not one first have to die to become a vampire?

But even more a glaring folly, no way in HELL would Charlie EVER kill his family, his sweet baby, no matter how bad things were with Cassie. Wouldn't it make SO much more sense for him to steal her back, and thus wouldn’t he come to see kidnapping synonymous with “saving,” a child, if Millie was the first one? Instead of having him try to kill them all, if that even was his dark intent, I would have had Cassie and Charlie fighting in the car, and Charlie, distracted by the quarrel, swerve, losing control, accidently crashing the Wraith. Cassie would be too far gone, but through his connection to the car, his Wraith would fight to save him, even if it meant borrowing a little siphon of his own daughter's youth.

Yeah, hey, let's talk for a quick sec about The Wraith. We know Charlie's life is connected to this mysterious car, but what we didn't know was how he acquired it........ until now. I don't know about you guys, but having Charlie simply purchase it, felt cheap to me, like it took away the magic of the fated knife, that he was always supposed to have. Bought. Sold. Done. NO. I didn't like it, and it never proved evident of the bond between Charlie and his Wraith. I would have had him find it, since he couldn't afford a new car on his own, a carcass, old, disused, rusted, and lovingly restore it, nurse it back to health, to life, until it shined. Charlie has a relationship with this car, a supernatural tie, and to me that would have been so much better, so much more meaningful than him pawning his wife's valuables to buy it. Meaning anybody could have done the same. One thing I LOVED about that scene, however, was seeing our dear Charles in his resplendent royal blue and blood red Chauffer's garb for the first time ever!!!! What a sneaking joy!!!

That's the thing about this episode, it's a dangerously mixed cocktail of anti-depressants and alcohol. There's so much to love, so much to hate, and so much to work over and over, trying to figure, until the point of insanity!!! I LOVED everything between our Miniature McQueen and young, hot, plaid clad Charlie, (HELLO SYLAR, am I right!?) and my heart STOPPED when I saw him over Wayne's shoulder, my pulse on pause, as they talked, and Charlie tutted disapproving, at the boy having never had a Christmas, not knowing who he was, who his mother was......... The suspense, the tension, was riveting.

I don't know how I feel about this impressive effort, trying to get me to despise Bing less, by having him say propaganda like, "I thought I was so big, because I had too much sad in me." That broke my heart, and it was infuriating, because I didn't want to feel any sympathy for him. No NOS4A2, you cannot try to turn me against My Magnificent Mister Manx, and in the same space, try to get me to like Bing CREEPER Partridge!!!! The scene in the graveyard was exceptionally well done, and I'm still shivering from the hushed thrill in Charlie's voice as he whispers. "He needs saving, Bing Partridge, don’t you agree?"

"Good Father," was an even more thrilling prospect as a title to me than, "Bad Mother," because I always knew it was true. Although, in retrospect, one is more inspired brilliance than the other. Can you still be a good father, and watch proudly as your young daughter becomes a monster, devouring her mother? Can you still be a good father, and leave your daughter, after she thought you were dead for eight years? Charlie is a good father, that went down a BAD road, and has forgotten the way back, although he still dons every surface appearance, as such. I did like when he made Millie apologize to his new charge, and curtsy with a begrudging welcome, spoken through her gritted teeth. That was adorably paternal, and one hundred percent Charlie!!!! However, as a whole, this episode persists as the mystery I can't solve, making me feel every emotion possible on the human spectrum, drinking in the dream, blissfully intoxicated, and sobbing uncontrollably, terrified out of my mind, the next.

Charlie may not be, "The Good Father," he once was, but a glimmer of it shines like a forgotten ember in his obsidian eyes, and despite the glaring conclusion this episode emphatically urges you to make, I still hold that there is good in Charlie, and that he can be saved. I also think it speaks revelations toward labels. Vic is no more a scarlet letter branded Bad Mother, than Charlie is a Good Father. There is good and bad, hero and villain, in all of us. It just depends what roads we're willing to take.

[megashadowdragon]

on lukes moment of weakness and how it is fitting for luke  among other comments

Personally I TOTALLY believe that George's Luke would have been VERY similarly to Rian's Luke.

And here is the reason why.... Luke has almost always been George's insert (lucas pronunced luke S )  and it makes total sense for Luke to be "exiled" and secluded away just as George became with Star Wars after the backlash of the prequels. But at the end of it, he comes back and stands up for what makes Star Wars what it is. Which is what Luke does for the Jedi and themes of Star Wars by the end of TLJ. He has learned from his mistakes, atoned for them, found redemption, confronted those he has failed, inspired hope, and learned to show compassion once again.

Now while George may have done it differently, I do believe that Luke being in exile was a metaphor for George's own relationship with Star Wars and its fandom.

www . reddit . com/r/StarWars/comments/ebb4f3/lukes_momentaneous_thought_of_killing_ben_solo/

I know I'm stepping on dangerous territory here by talking about The Last Jedi, and I only do this because I think this is an interesting take on a key moment of the movie. Just bear in mind that I do not intend to make my point-of-view the absolute truth of it. After all, this is just my opinion.

We all know very well how divisive Episode VIII was, with many people pationately hating that movie. One of the main reasons of complaint is the fact Luke Skywalker had attempted to kill his apprentice and nephew, Ben Solo, because he sensed the Dark Side to be too strong in the latter. Luke Skywalker, the only person in the entire galaxy that saw there was still light in Darth Vader, tried to kill his relative. When even Obi-Wan Kenobi and Yoda had lost all hope Anakin could be saved, Luke helped putting him on the path of redemption, helping Vader turn back to the Light and fulfill the prophecy of the Chosen One. It seems to be an insult that this same character gave up on his nephew so easily and tried to kill him.

I believe things must be analyzed more carefully.

I've just finished marathoning the Skywalker Saga (by the way, I STRONGLY recommend the Ersnt Rister order: IV-V-I-II-III-VI) and noticed something very interesting while watching Return Of The Jedi.

During the final moments of Luke and Vader's duel aboard the Death Star II, we see the young Jedi Knight wants to avoid fighting his father so as not to fall in the trecharous web of Palpatine, who wants to turn the young Skywalker to the Dark Side. Luke is hiding beneath the Emperor's throne. Vader chases him and, through the Force, reads Luke's thoughts to lure him into confrontation:

You cannot hide forever, Luke. Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends. Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for... sister! So, you have a twin sister!

In this moment, we see Luke's face and he's completely terrified by the idea Darth Vader found out about his sister. It is something new and Luke fears for Leia's well-being. Also, we hear from Vader's words that he cares a lot about his friends, the people he loves. Vader continues:

Your feelings have now betrayed her too. Obi-Wan was wise to hide her from me. Now his failure is complete. If you will not turn to the Dark Side, THEN PERHAPS SHE WILL!

Now we have something different. Since he was brought before the Emperor, Luke had been constatly confronted by Palpatine and Vader with the idea of him turning to the Dark Side. When Vader talks about the possibility of that happening to Leia, it's not a threat directed to him, but to someone he loves. In this moment, Luke loses it completly and attacks Vader viciously, totally enraged. The Sith Lord can't stand the power of his son, fuelled by hate and falls to the ground, defeated. In this moment Luke is prepared to make the final blow, but then he hears Palpatine laughing and clapping. This makes him go back to his senses and realize what he's been doing. He then turns off his lightsaber and refuses to kill his father.

"I'm a Jedi, like my father before me" and so on... we know what happens, so let's fast-forward to The Last Jedi.

When Luke is confronted by Rey, who demands him to tell what had happened between him and Kylo Ren, we learn how things unfolded through Luke's perspective:

I saw darkness. I sensed it building in him. I'd seen it in moments during his training. But then I looked inside, and it was beyond what I ever imagined.

In this moment of the flashback we see Luke's hand reaching out to his lightsaber, almost unconsciously. He then proceeds:

. He would bring destruction and pain and death, AND THE END OF EVERYTHING I LOVE BECAUSE OF WHAT HE WILL BECOME, AND FOR THE BRIEFEST MOMENT OF PURE INSTINCT, I THOUGHT I COULD STOP IT.

Here it is again. Like in Episode VI, we see Luke reacting in a similar way by the notion of something posing a threat not to him, but to the people he loves and cares about. Luke feared Ben would destroy everything he cherished, just like Vader had threatened by turning Leia to the dark. And, just like in the OT, it was a passing shadow:

It passed like a fleeting shadow, and I was left with shame and with consequence. And the last thing I saw were the eyes of a frightened boy whose Master had failed him.

I've already written way more than I expected, so I'll just conclude here. I've realized the act Luke commits in the Sequels is the same (or at least VERY similar) as from the OT: he attempted to kill Vader then his nephew, out of fear of seeing what/who he loved destroyed. He repented and managed to stop himself in the act in both situations. And he was ashamed. So, at least regarding this point of the movie, I see the same Luke Skywalker.

(luke had more to lose now then he did before 

another example which I saw dont remember where I saw it  but I saved the comments unfortunately I didnt put in the links:

edit: (now I remember www . reddit . com/r/StarWars/comments/9a3hdl/)

Luke considered killing Ben for about two seconds in a vulnerable moment

Sort of like he almost got baited into killing Vader by a few mocking words, and cut the hand off his own father in blind rage.

Luke is still just a person. If we've learned anything in Star Wars it's that the Jedi are not superhuman paragons of virtue and perfection, no matter how they might appear to the unwashed masses in the SW universe. They have the same flaws, temptations, failures, etc as anyone else. Yes the Force can help them overcome some of this, but they're far from perfect. Luke could have, and I agree should have grown in a positive way, but it's not impossible or even unbelievable that he didn't. He just had his life's labor wiped out in front of him and blamed himself for it. All those years of finding lost Jedi knowledge and artifacts, being what he believed to be the last Jedi in the universe with the responsibility to restart the order on his shoulders alone. All those lives that he took under his protection and guidance as the Master of the new order, wiped out in one night. Because of him (at least in his mind). Everything he was working towards for years just totally undone in a few hours and it was all his fault.

So he leaves and says fuck the whole lot of it. He lives by himself, stews in his misery and regret, retreats into himself and rejects the most foundational principle of the whole concept of being a Jedi: to help people. He's the most powerful Force user alive and he's wasting away by himself on some desolate rock, swearing off the rest of the galaxy because he thinks that he's a failure, that he wasn't strong or good enough, that he can't win, that it's not even worth it to try anymore, and that even at the height of his wisdom and power, it was all undone, and by himself no less.

another comment

Stuff has changed, I mean he’s quicker to come to his senses. I wouldn’t call that his flaw though. His flaw is one of his greatest traits, his care for his friends and family. It’s a flaw cause it causes implusive actions, lashing out on Vader, leaving Yoda, a single thought that he could stop a horrible fate in Ben.

I personal struggle with a temptation in my life, a temptation to do something my faith says is wrong to do. I may have overcome it some days, but other days, whether the same circumstances or not, I might fall into it. Temptations are a constant battle, not a one and done thing. Flaws are similar, you don’t just grow past a flaw after one instance.

Because a day may come when you will brought face-to-face with that temptation or flaw again, but the circumstances will be different, and it won’t be so easy to overcome.

You mentioned Toy Story in a post, and that’s a decent example when it comes to one facet. Woody might not get jealous when another flashy toy comes along that gets more attention like Buzz did.

A better example of the nagging of a temptation, like Luke dealt with, is in Lord of the Rings. The Ring is a constant temptation to the bearer and those around them. At least by the film, Frodo may have resisted the urge to use it under the tree, but he still was tempted to use it at other times, and it was a constant battle. Same with Bilbo. Bilbo held the ring for 60 years. And the temptation of it held him greatly. He drops the Ring in Bag End, letting it go. If he was viewed similarly to how people viewed Luke tossing the saber, that’d mean he freed himself from it’s grasp and from the temptation to take and use it. We see in Rivendell that isn’t the case for him. He has a moment of wanting to take it back, and even at the end of his time in Middle Earth, he inquires about it, although more innocently curious.

That would be more similar to Luke’s case. To fall to the dark is a constant temptation that Jedi should always be aware of, and if you get close at one point, there’s the possibility that it’ll happen again, and if you aren’t prepared or it comes in a different form, you’ll either fall or get really close.

That turned out longer than I meant it, but I see this idea and..it’s just not the case.

another comment 

Just because you get older doesn't mean you necessarily get wiser and better.

Jedi are still people (and some aliens, but you get the meaning), and the prequels (and even the OT) showed that even the oldest and wisest among the Jedi were capable of mistakes and misjudgments.

I think it's unreasonable to assume Luke should have become incapable of making, or even repeating mistakes and succumbing to emotion.

Right because people only get better as they get older and we grow past our flaws and doubts permanently right?

You guys are weird.

Luke overcame that moment of doubt before he almost struck Vader down and you think what ....... Luke got some kind of videogame like powerup where that character flaw would never come back again?

Some of you have a very black and white (boring) opinion on life and human growth.

Spoiler: People have flaws, we don't all overcome those flaws.Your boy Luke is no exception.

Consider what nearly proved to be his downfall in Return of the Jedi: for all the Emperor's taunting about the Rebel Alliance's imminent demise, it was Darth Vader who finally pushed his Berserk Button by discovering that Leia was his twin sister and suggesting that if Luke didn't change sides, he and his master might have better luck turning her. Then, when Luke went berserk, it totally worked: he curb-stomped Darth Vader and still didn't go evil in the end. His father's killing off the Emperor also put an end to a whole lot of the Empire's evil and birthed the New Republic.

Flash forward thirty years, and once again someone is threatening everyone and everything Luke loves, and killing the guy would surely preempt a whole lot of trouble. In his heart of hearts, he doubtless remembers what Yoda taught him about how easy and seductive the Dark Side is, but he also remembers how Yoda's mistake of hiding the truth about his lineage from him nearly brought his downfall. He also remembers how killing the Emperor solved so many problems the way he'd better not try to solve them this time... Well, what's so tempting about that?

Luke had more to lose at this time. He knew what a relatively free, peaceful Galaxy looked like, and had other students to care for besides Ben. Instinctively, he was acting out of concern for them. Luke makes an important point when he gives Rey the truth: it is a split second. Luke is a hero, but he's human. He was impulsive and acted on instinct in his youth, so the fear of Ben turning is enough to push him to the edge for a second.

hopeforben . tumblr . com/post/623000635980333056/theres-a-significant-portion-of-the-fandom-that/embed

@emeraldspiral​ 

@daughter-of-water​

@someoneintheshadow456​

[michams]

VIXX “Scentist” analysis based on “Perfume”, by P. Suskind PART I  - The MV (1/2)

“Scentist” is definitely one of my favorite songs/ music videos/ concepts in kpop so last year, when I got to know it was based on a book, I went after and read it. Since then I’ve been wanting to share an analysis focused on more direct references to Suskind’s story.

In “PART I” I’ll be giving my thoughts on how the Music Video is related to the book. Since it turned out quite long, there will be two posts.

Some considerations i. This analysis does not really explain the story in the MV itself, since it has a lot more factors involving stuff (apparently) specifically made for Vixx. There are many interesting theories posted by other Starlights though.

ii. I didn’t originally read the book in English, so I’m using my own translations – which can differ from other editions.

iii. This is somewhat a personal interpretation; one could read the same book and have different opinions. Feel free to tell me your thoughts about it  :^)

iv. As referred before, English is not my first language. Feel free to let me know about any mistakes.

v. Mind that this analysis contains SPOILERS of the book.

vi. This post makes reference to sensitive subjects (such as violence), like the book itself.

The structure of the analysis I decided to follow the plot of the book rather than the sequence shown in the music video and I divided the whole analysis in parts.

The book “In the XVIII century France, Jean-Baptist Grenouille is a young man with a sublime gift – an absolute ability to perceive odors. He doesn’t have any smell himself. Obsessed with capturing scents, one day he smells an fragrance that will take him into a disturbing search for the world’s most powerful perfume – one capable of dominating people’s hearts.”

The novel is divided into four parts: in the first post (1/2) I will talk about the 1st and 2nd, and in the second (2/2) about 3rd and 4th.

                                                          * * * FIRST PART In the first part of the novel, we get to follow Grenouille’s birth and youth. When he was born, he almost died, however he was found out and taken care of by different people before being sent away to a sort of orphanage. As a kid, he went through many illnesses and accidents, which left many scars – but he was very resistant.

The boy had a late and slow development process. By this time he was conscious of his outstanding ability for smelling and began to build his inner aromas library, combining them to create new ones. He mostly shut himself from the world and avoided interaction.

[Image 01 - 0:56 sec]  This can be a representation of the young Grenouille, lost in his thoughts and imagination regarding what he smells.

[Image 01.2 - 1:36 min] The lenses some members use are the color in which the boy’s eyes are described: a tone between grey and opal-blue.

When he was 8 years old and the convent ceases from sending money, he was exchanged at a tannery. He was supposed to do the heavy work and quietly subordinates himself to his boss’ orders.

[Image 02 - 0:39 sec]  I associate this to the unique way Grenouille had to view the outside world, always on the look for the finest, undetectable smells.

“He is very greedy and takes in any sort of smell; he wished to posses all kinds the world had to offer.”

In a night of celebration, during a firework show, he felt a really soft aroma – one he had never sensed before and superior to anything he had ever known. He felt an urge in his heart to posses that scent. He is confused when he’s led to a girl, since he didn’t think a human could smell to anything good. He ends up killing her, only worrying about not missing the scent.

[Image 03 - 1:41 min]  I like to associate this scene to the night he first feels that special scent. Leo is seen with his eyes closed, which relates to both Grenouille conducting himself in the dark and being pulled by the scent, allured by that sensation.

“This is when he understands his fate is to be the greatest perfumer of all times.”

When delivering suede, he meets an old traditionalist Italian perfumer – who had  great knowledge, but not much natural talent – and tells him he wishes to be his apprentice. He proves his ability by making a perfume. At first, the man was horrified by his non-methodical ways but is suddenly dumbstruck by the smell. Grenouille frenetically created many scents everyday. This is when he learns appropriate methods to work, how to use formulas and the first techniques for isolating essences.

[Image 04 - 0:51 sec] This would represent Grenouille making perfumes by measuring the ingredients, noting and starting to view them as formulas.

[Image 05 - 0:52 sec] [Image 06 - 0:32 sec]  The images showing flowers in a sort of liquid makes reference to the process of extracting their essences.

[Image 07 - 0:55 sec] [Image 08 - 0:27 sec]  Here, Hongbin watches and waits as the drops of essence (usually oils) get collected.

[Image 09 - 0:34 sec]  I associate this scene to the fragrances Grenouille creates combining mentally the smells he knows; Hongbin and Hyuk would be the representation of his work in a kind of “inner laboratory”.

He began tracing a scheme on how he would use that knowledge in the near future plans. He starts experimenting. However, when failing to obtain essences from objects and other unusual materials, he stopped and fell deadly ill. Only after being told there are other methods, he recovers. They get to an agreement so that he would be permitted to go. With his title of auxiliary and new skills, he begins a new journey.

[Image 10 - 1:13 min]  Although I was confused by the car, I generally associate it with Grenouille’s journey and travelling (which will keep on in the future, as we will see); at this point, it would represent him leaving the city.

                                                          * * * SECOND PART This is the period when Grenouille’s seclusion takes place. The farther he walked from Paris the better he felt and his nose became more sensible the more he got used to nature. It became unbearable to have any kind of human smell around him, it was disgusting. He began walking only at night. He goes to the most isolated place in the kingdom, the peak of a 2000 meters mountain. He finds a faint stream of water, small animals and plants to feed himself with, as well as a cave; at its bottom, there were a tight place he felt had never been touched by a living being – he laid there and only left for basic needs. He would get lost for days in his inner empire, filled with the smells in his memory.

[Image 11 - 0:05 sec] [Image 12 - 1:38 min]  This would be the moment Grenouille finds and enters the cave.

[Image 13 - 0:04 sec]  I associate this with Grenouille reaching the bottom of the cave and feeling at ease by setting in that place.

He fell into a deep sleep (almost as if hibernating), and created whole settings making use of smells of the things he wanted to be a part of his perfect kingdom, where he reigned supreme. He felt home in his purple castle.

[Image 14 - 0:25 sec] [Image 15 - 0:46 sec] [Image 16 - 0:46 sec]  This represents Jean-Baptist during his sleep inside the cave, dreaming of his kingdom and palace.

[Image 17 - 2:30 min]  Here, the boy representing Grenouille appears again, this time wearing his crown, as he rules his inner kingdom built of smells.

In his purple salon, resting on a sofa, he asks imaginary servers to bring him volumes from his scents library and bottles of the finest smells to drink. As he did so, he was delighted by pleasure and peace. He drinks the girl’s aroma for last. Drunk, he falls asleep.

[Image 18 - 1:21 min]  Serving as a background throughout the MV, Ken stands in front of the scents storage, which Grenouille savors as drinks by bringing them back from his memory.

[Image 19 - 1:18 min] [Image 20 - 2:09 min]  The representation of the aroma drinks being served.

[Image 21 - 2:25 min]  N, as Grenouille, appreciating one of the memories (possibly the girl’s scent, judging by his reaction).

The outer world was completely hostile to him. He stayed like this for 7 years. However, one day a catastrophe happened in his fantasy. While sleeping in the salon, slowly, a cloud of smell began to take over the place. It was his own smell, but the boy gets desperate finding out he couldn’t feel a thing.

[Image 22 - 1:38 min]  This could a be representation of Grenouille observing and reflecting over the mist taking over his fantasy.

He screamed terribly, destroying the walls of his kingdom. Even scared by the uncertainty of not being able to smell something, when he is sure there’s no odor, he puts his clothes rags on and leaves.

[Image 23 - 0:52 sec]  The crashing glass could represent the destruction of the palace when Grenouille is taken by the fear of not smelling himself. (Note: I also considered whether this scene was related to Grenouille’s frustration when he fails to obtain the essences, during his period working for the perfurmer, specially taking to account the sequence it’s shown along in the MV).

[Image 24 - 2:46 min]  I associate this to Grenouille once again considering going out of the cave into the outside world, as Hyuk is seen bathed by exterior light.

Grenouille looked terrible; he tells people he had been robbed and kidnapped, being kept captive for 7 years in a cave. He is then taken to to a Marquis who dedicated his life to science and led a study on the relation between the proximity to earth and vital energy. He is invited to the Marquis’ castle and showed off to the academic community in Montpellier. Grenouille was fed and groomed. It was the first time he was addressed as monsieur and the first time he saw himself in a mirror.

[Image 25 - 1:26 min]  Grenouille sees himself in the mirror. We can associate this to the impression he causes in himself; somehow a boy looking at a man, with many hidden goals deep inside. He describes the image as a “(…) figure disguised as a person (...)” - he thinks all that was because of the clothes and makeup (rather than the Marquis curing him or a change of character).

Making use of some excuses, he gets to use the laboratory of a local perfumery and makes a fragrance to spray himself with and smell “like a human”. Walking around to test its effectiveness, for the first time, people finally noticed his presence (in a very natural way).

“He understood he could overcome what he just did and create a perfume able to make people love him, fall on their knees for him without knowing the reason why. He wanted to dominate their hearts. The omnipotent God of aroma.”

References used:  - Book: Perfume, the story of a murderer; by P. Suskind (2007 ed., Editora Record). - 빅스(VIXX) - '향 (Scentist)' Official M/V (YouTube). - Film:  Perfume, the story of a murderer (2006).

To be continued...here!

[fandoms-keep-me-alive]

Guys, I need Help. This is a convo between me and my boyfriend. after this, there was a phone call but I don't have the energy to add those details yet, but I need yall's opinion.

Its gonna be kinda long just warning you

Joseph, you are:

Kind

Always there to help others even at your own expense, considers it your calling in life.

Considerate

Favorite color is blue

From Texas

Understand the value of hard work

Have a near photographic memory

Curious

Seek out truth wherever you can find it

Good with kids

Creative

Thoughtful

Attentive

Open minded

Sarcastic

Dark humor

Supportive

Have thought provoking conversations/ideas

Make me feel wanted

Takes your hat with you everywhere

Are a little self conscious about your hair, but it's cute and wavy and fluffy and soft with a tinge of Chestnut red

Have an amazing beard

Culinary curious

Strong

Healthy

Squishy

Courteous

Understanding

Respectful

Gentle

Loving

Nerd

Inquisitive

Humble

Needs hugs

Deserves love

Have so much potential

Are an animal lover

Carnivore

Saved my Life at least once

And I love you for all of it.

After I sent that to him this is the conversation that followed 6/7/19:

SinToday at 5:27 AM

Thats really sweet emilie

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:28 AM

I'm glad you like it

SinToday at 5:33 AM

... Tbh every nice thing you say makes it harder for when you leave on mission

X.x

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:33 AM

I'm sorry

SinToday at 5:33 AM

... No you aren't

Sorry not sorry

Lol

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:34 AM

I'm sorry that I'm making it hard for you

SinToday at 5:34 AM

Oh.. Well its more im making it hard on myself

Im still finding it really hard to emotionally attach

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:35 AM

If it's make it easier I can try to dial it back some

SinToday at 5:35 AM

Because you know

The whole.. Away for a year and change.

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:36 AM

I know I'm sorry

SinToday at 5:37 AM

Like.. I care and really do enjoy being with you, but... Pardon the extremely dark analogy.. But its like dating someone with the knowledge they wont be there in a few months due to a illness.

But you aren't ill and its not like you won't be around

....idk

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:39 AM

I get it, it's painful

SinToday at 5:39 AM

It keeps me up at night. Worrying that we both will be hurt by this more severely if we keep on

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:39 AM

I'm sorry

SinToday at 5:39 AM

Its not your fault

You've done nothing but be an amazing girlfriend

Meanwhile I've been nothing short of distant, cold, and a total jerk

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:40 AM

No sweetheart

SinToday at 5:42 AM

I mean yes.. I have been. Its not fair to you and you deserve someone who is within your faith. Who can treat you like you deserve to be, and is perfect in all regards

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:44 AM

First off I learned a long time ago that the perfect person doesn't exist second you've treated me wonderfully and you've just been doing what you can to keep yourself afloat which is more than I can say for myself

SinToday at 5:46 AM

Idk.. I think that the whole me being your boyfriend thing... While its nice.. And wonderful.. And i absolutely enjoy it.. Idk i just dont think it was wise of us to do it knowing that you'd only be here for 3 more months. Much less the fact that your feelings have only grown

-_-

I am hating myself for not being stronger.

I just DO NOT want to ever cause you so much pain that you'd end up hurt, devastated, and unable to fulfil the role of your faith that you were sent to do

And yet, im aware of my own flaws and self enough to know that one day i might do that. And you dont deserve that.

hugs you tightly

Im sorry for being a wreck

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:52 AM

It's ok sweetie so am I

I just....

SinToday at 5:53 AM

Blehh... Ik this wasnt exactly the greatest time.. I was just suffering without saying anything and that super sweet and kind gesture kinda broke the dam

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 5:53 AM

I understand

It's just, dating you has made me happier then I've been in a long time and I don't want it to stop any sooner then it has to.

I'm so sorry I've put you through this much termoil

SinToday at 5:55 AM

I know this is true.

And truly it has helped me realize my own self worth, and you have taught me and continue to teach me every day as to how to be a better person

Do not misunderstand the value you hold with me. You are truly a wonderful person and a treasure this world should have... But after being with you, knowing the love you can show, the blessings you bring to everyone around you, the kindness and gentleness of your heart... I would rather it end sooner rather than later so as to save you any excess grief while out on mission... That mission is truly important, to you, your faith, your family, and to higher powers. While what we share is wonderful.. And what we offer eachother is wholesome.. Ive asked for guidance... And the answer in my eyes was clear enough for me to reach a decision... While i care perhaps too deeply for you, i believe we shouldnt draw out what we have until the last minute...

For both your sake.. And for my own conscience/feelings.

That said...

I want to know your thoughts...

i want you to know these are my feelings laid bare. Ive thought long and hard regarding it.. And its unfair to you for me to be selfish and attempt to keep you for as long as possible, even if we both wish to be selfish

And im not yet breaking up with you

I just wanted my feelings, thoughts, what guidance I've been given, to be shared with you. As you 100% deserve to know

Secondly. Ill never text breakup with anyone

Mushroom Studio'sToday at 6:08 AM

Heh... Can I call?

SinToday at 6:08 AM

Yes.. Itll be loud

[chubbyooo]

Blurred Lines : Chapter 3 - Ashara

yay chapter 3 continuing the plot line in chapter one, this one’s a long one

Kyradia talks to an old friend (i wonder who it could be *looks at title*) and has to face some of her own flaws

As Ashara turned around her face turned from a calm smile to a frown. “Kyradia how did you get this contact this is supposed to be for emergencies only” she looked furious no wonder to be honest.

emergencies? Kavaraa had failed to tell her about that context, oh god what was she supposed to say this was all a big mistake she didn’t know what to do but she had to say something Ashara was just stood there looking all angry, hands on her hips those narrowed eyes like Kyradia had just suggested a crazy plan.

“well” she said impatiently Kyradia realized she had been silent for over thirty seconds.

“um hi Ashara i uh just wanted to um first of all apologize for what happened on Voss” oh god why was this so hard Kyradia had given speeches to the galaxy before, this was her old apprentice once one of her greatest friends oh right that’s why, she cared a lot more about Asharas opinion.

“oh really you wan’t to apologize now, you seemed pretty clear on your opinion back on Voss” Ashara said her face was all angry and scrunched up god this was gonna be a hard sell.

“yeah i wasn’t really thinking straight at the time and i made a mistake i’m really sorry” that seemed good right, it was the truth after all.

“you tried to SHOCK me” she said raising her voice oh god yep there it is, is there any way to salvage this Kyradia thought, her mind was racing as she tried to think of ways to justify her actions as anything other than cruel which it really was “give me one good reason why i shouldn’t hang this call up right now” oh god it’s do or die just say what you’re thinking be honest.

Kyradia sighed here we go “look... i get jealous of good people they make me feel like i’m inadequate and that i can’t become better. I  take it out on them instead of realizing i’m angry at myself” is the truth working Ashara was listening but still seemed angry “and when i saw you so grown up and like a proper Jedi i felt like you had outgrown me and didn’t need me anymore. I didn’t want to lose you so i tried to bring you down to my level by trying to expose your flaws and in turn that made me lose you” wow i don’t think i even knew that about myself before now she thought “i understand if you want to hang up this call and never speak to me again but i needed closure” she paused  “that’s one of the reasons i called”

Ashara seemed taken aback her eyes were wide and she no longer seemed so mad “i uh i didn’t realize you felt like that” she looked away from Kyradia holding her arm “how do i know you’re not just trying to manipulate me again”

Kyradia knew the only way to get he to believe her was to let her choose “because if you hang up now i wont pursue it any further I've made my peace i hope you understood it but it’s up to you not me” Ashara actually looked like she smiled for just a second oh thank god for the first time during the call Kyradia relaxed.

“ i’m sorry i judged you so harshly on Voss i didn’t mean to make you feel bad i honestly hoped you’d be proud of me” Ashara looked kinda embarrassed this must be fixed immediately Kyradia thought suddenly knowing exactly what to say.

“ok you have nothing to be sorry about this is entirely my fault and of course i’m proud of you, look at you your everything you ever wanted to be how could i not be proud” at that Ashara went red and looked away clearly overwhelmed .

“thanks master” she said with a shy smile.

“no please don’t call me master call me Kyradia or Ky if you’re so inclined” Kyradia grinned she felt the best she felt in weeks ever since Ossus she couldn’t get these things off her mind her head finally felt clear.

“ok Kyradia” Ashara said rather stnted and awkward “you said this wasn’t the only reason you called” Ashara had sat down now her calm warm smile had returned, Kyradia hadn’t seen that in 7 years. But now she had to go back into the less positive stuff.

“right well i made a similar mistake recently with a close friend she got angry at me for making a bad call and i retaliated” Kyradia put her head in her hands as she talked “now we’re not talking”

“ok i see, but what does this have to do with me” Ashara looked stern again Kyradia hoped this hadn’t put her off.

“i think i need someone to tell me when to stop, i don’t want this to happen again” Kyradia said she hated having to admit weakness, she was supposed to be the leader of the alliance not a nervous wreck “and you seem perfect for that, also i miss your company”

“so you need me” Ashara seemed guarded again maybe come on a bit less strong Ky show her you’ve changed.

“look i’m not going to force you into anything but i would like to show you I've changed so if we could talk in person on Odessen maybe you could help me with those jedi skills of yours” Kyradia really wanted to catch up more than anything but she did need help as well.

“ok fine but i will be on my guard i’ll see you then” Ashara said  as she ended the call. Kyradia sat there for a minute contemplating what just happened thank god she understood best get dressed got a Jedi to meet.

Kyradia sat at the Odessen bar hands on her drink tapping the glass furiously she was way too nervous about this, the hard part was over now just to prove you’re a better person.

She felt a tap on her shoulder that shocked her into jumping out her seat, is she here yet? once she focused she saw it was Lana.

“commander are you alright” she said with her eyebrow raised.

“yeah totally fine great how are you” Kyradia leaned on the bar trying to look normal Lana looked thoroughly unimpressed.

“fine, we had a distress call from Kavaraas temple on Yavin 4 and need someone to look into it” oh of course she had to go do something .

“i’m kinda busy right now i’m meeting back up with my old apprentice” Kyradia said with a sigh.

“well i’m afraid we have no one else how can look into it and i think you owe it to her” damn it why was she always right, stupid sensible Lana.

“fine i’ll look into it” no point in arguing with Lana she knows what’s best and she’d almost definitely win the argument.

“good luck with your apprentice” Lana said with a half smile before leaving promptly.

Kyradia went back to sitting for another fifteen minutes before she saw the blue and white lekku of Ashara come through the door she quickly waved her over.

“um hi” Ashara said quietly man what’s the best way to make this not awkward.

“how have you been it feels like forever since we were on the fury” start small yes good easy don’t push it.

“well I’ve mostly been okay after you were captured we all tried our best to find where you were, we did that for about a year, well at least me and Andronikous everyone else kinda disappeared once they gave up on a quick rescue”

“i’m aware of them don’t worry i’m glad you two stayed” she leaned in “you were always my favorite” Kyradia smiled this wasn’t so bad

Ashara chuckled “yeah i know i don’’t think you were that subtle with that” what i thought they couldn’t tell damn gotta be more sneaky “anyway after a while the search was getting to me i was more vicious and stubborn i realised i needed to take some time away to remove the darkness that was building inside me so i had to leave Andronikous which didn’t exactly go down well” i can imagine that man never stopped searching Kyradia thought “he said i was cowardly but i knew i had to go then i studied peace and serenity on Voss until you found me years later” Ashara frowned “since then I've been trying to do what i can to help people.

Kyradia felt bad but thought not to press it right now “well i’d tell you how I've been but 5 years in carbonite and then 2 years documented by the whole galaxy so you probably already know”

Ashara chuckled again “yeah I've been keeping up with your exploits” she said with a smile “thank you for saving everyone i knew you were capable of it” Kyradia smiled but felt a bit somber

“i’ll be honest i was just doing it because i was angry at Arcann and wanted revenge for Marr but i kinda learned a lot along the way” She said half smiling

Ashara gave a smile “i think it was more than just that you had something to fight for you lost something you cared about and knew that what happened was wrong.” damn forgot how good she was at reading her

“sooooo is there anyone else you’ve met along the way” Kyradia gave Ashara a friendly nudge if this didn’t diffuse the tension nothing would

Ashara went bright red as she said that “what? i mean um no i dunno i’m uh a Jedi i” she contiuned to fumble for about thirty seconds while Kyradia gave a evil smile

“you’re messing with me aren't you” Ashara said glaring as Kyradia

“ hehe maybe” Kyradia said this had been great she hadn’t felt this positive in ages it’s a shame she had work to do “i’m sorry to cut this sort but i have to go investigate some distress on Yavin IV, something at a jedi temple” Kyradia was hoping that Ashara would offer to help considering those circumstances.

Ashara looked concerned “what’s the danger?”

“not sure could be pretty dangerous i should be able to handle it”  cmon reverse psychology

“ok no i’m not letting you go to an unknown danger alone after what you’ve been telling me i’m coming too” yesss it worked

“ok sure i wouldn't mind some company” Ashara narrowed her eyes as Kyradia said that

“that’s what you wanted wasn’t it” Ashara said with a coy smile

“maybe” Kyradia said looking purposefully shifty. In response Ashara pulled Kyradia into a hug “what are you doing” Kyradia said her arms limp unsure what to do

“getting you back” she smiled evilly “i remember you hate hugs, also you seem to have changed so much i’m so pleased” Kyradia felt a little water in her eyes, eeww feelings

“thanks Ashara” she said returning the hug...

[cherubhearted]

92 Truths Tag

RULES: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged!

Tagged by the lovely and the amazing @purelysoft ! tysm <3 

LAST:

Drink: dr. pepper

Phone call: to my manager for work ;u; 

Text message: me complaining to my bf about having to work tomorrow!

Song you listened to: “your reality” from doki doki literature club </3

Time you cried: it was almost today, lol. i dont actually remember the last time, i think when i watched doki doki for the first time.

HAVE YOU EVER: 

Dated someone twice: nah fam

Been cheated on: nope

Kissed someone and regretted it: mmmm nah

Lost someone special: yes.

Been depressed: for sure. it’s something i still battle with unfortunately, but i’m better than before.

Been drunk and thrown up: i’ve never thrown up from being drunk, but i’ve never gotten that wasted before either.

IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

Made a new friend: i’ve made several new acquaintances. i’d say the only “real” new friends i’ve made were about two years ago when i started college. 

Fallen out of love: nope i’d say i’m more in love now than ever before <3

Met someone who changed you: not this year, no. 

Laughed until you cried: yes, over the dumbest thing too lmao

Found out who your true friends are: yeah, i think so.

Found out someone was talking about you: is this just bad things? i found out one of my friends says very nice things about me haha. but i don’t doubt people talk bad about me all the time either. or am i just paranoid? idk.

GENERAL:

How many people on tumblr do you know in real life?: like...four i think. 

Do you have any pets?: yep, i have 5 cats (yikes! sounds like a lot but only two of them solely belong to me because i adopted them, haha.), two dogs, and some small fish.

Do you want to change your name?: i legally want to change my name to my preferred name, yes. 

What time did you wake up this morning?: twelve p.m., i slept in haha.

Name something you cannot wait for: the black panther movie!! also can’t wait for the my hero academia fighting game, and the day me and my bf finally get a little apartment together. <3

Have you ever talked to a person named tom?: um...does tom from animal crossing count??

What’s getting on your nerves right now: work, omg.

Blood type: i dont know actually 

Nickname: i have a few...davey, and baby boy are my boyfriend’s favorites <3

Relationship status: taken as heck 

Zodiac sign: aries! 

Pronouns:  he/him

Favorite show: haikyuu! <333 

College: art institute!

Hair color: platinum blond/gray, my natural hair is a dark strawberry blonde

Do you have a crush on someone: is it bad i get crushes easily? but my bf is still my #1 crush

What do you like about yourself: i’ve grown a lot as a person and keep growing every year. i’ve learned to love myself when i used to detest myself, and i can at least say i’m proud of who i am now.

FIRSTS:

First surgery: idk if it really counts as a surgery but i had to have some scar tissue lasered off before. 

First piercing: my first and only, an industrial bar in each ear. 

First sport you joined: track and field! the only sport i was interested in joining since i was little.

First vacation: ummm probably a trip to California when i way too little to remember it?? so does that really count.

First pair of sneakers: baby sneakers probably 

RIGHT NOW:

Eating: these little chocolate covered strawberry cream cake snacks.

Drinking: dr. pepper

I’m about to: work on homework

Listening to: “a horse with no name” michelle branch 

Want kids: nah. if i ever did, i’d wanna adopt, that’s the only way.

Get married: hm...well i obviously dont want to right now, but im not opposed to ever being married!

Career: i work in retail right now, but i’m working to become a designer.

WHICH IS BETTER:

Lips or eyes: geez, idk, both? but in my opinion a really nice pair of lips is like, the greatest blessing a person can naturally have.

Hugs or kisses: ahh...i love both...but kisses are great....wait, why am i on about lips again??

Shorter or taller: ffff. how can i choose? it depends on the person.

Troublemaker or hesitant: gotta love them troublemakers.

Older or younger: ummm is this for romantic interests or? well ive always gotten along with older people anyway. one of my best friends is five years older than me in college so i guess thats a good age range. 

Romantic or spontaneous: ummm romantic! im such a sap

Sensitive or loud: mmmmm idk really? i like...people that are both. i’m both too so maybe thats why.

Hookup or relationship: ive never had a hookup haha. so relationships.

HAVE YOU EVER:

Kissed a stranger: lmao nope i dont have that kinda nerve

Drank hard liquor: nope i probably would hate the taste too much

Lost contacts/glasses: i’ve lost my boyfriend’s!

Sex on the first date: nope, i dont have enough first dates haha

Broken someone’s heart: unfortunately, yes. i’ll admit to it, bc i wanted to be friends and she didnt

Been arrested: omg heck no

Turned someone down: eheh, yeah, unfortunately, a lot of people 

Fallen for a friend: yeppp 

DO YOU BELIEVE: 

In yourself: some days!

Miracles: nah.

Love at first sight: this is gay but yes bc i literally was so smitten with my bf the first day i ever met him. never thought that was possible tbh

TAGGING: ummmm lemme tag some cool blogs! i’d also like to get to know these guys better:

@malnedott @stephie-senpai @lunawlw @goth-kid @safeflora @moonkidcat @chire-styx @beautiful-smol-prince @lambmilk @chaste-juvenescence @rotten-angel-food @kultani @heavensentcherub 

You don’t have to do all the questions if you arent comfortable with some of them! also anyone who i didnt tag (theres so many of you lovely followers!) who wants to do it, please do! i wanna get to know you guys better. <3

[momentsinsong]

Moments In Song No. 019 - Victor

“Moments In Song” asks people one simple question, “What are you listening to?” We believe that you can learn a lot about an individual and their experiences based off of the music they love. For every installment we ask someone to make a playlist of 10 songs they’re listening to, whether it be something new they stumbled upon, or a song they’ve always loved, and explain the story behind their choices. The person’s playlist is then uploaded, giving them the chance to share it with others. Each post aims to profile someone from a different walk of life, whether they be an artist, a student, the mailman, a school teacher, an athlete, a nurse, your next-door neighbor, anyone with a love for music; showing that no matter where we come from, what we do, or what we look like, music has the ability to bring us together.

With an ethereal set of songs that accompany his pensive thoughts, pharmacy student and rapper Victor gives us a track by track breakdown of his playlist. We talk his musical influences, Clams Casino productions, and what he thinks is the greatest song of all time.

Listen to Victor’s playlist on Apple Music and Spotify.

Words by Julian | Photos by Tayo

What was thought process behind putting your playlist together?

I just made a playlist of almost all the songs I listen to when I’m in pensive thought or songs that have a cool ethereal mood to them. I’ve always been in tune to that kind of music. That’s why I have two songs from Clams Casino on there. For me, Clams Casino is probably one of the best producers of the past decade. Very influential. His influence spans what most people can even fathom. If I look at his work with Lil B in 2009, 2010, and then look at the type of beats all these rappers are rapping on now, or their style, and how they rap, Clams Casino and Lil B were very influential.

Without Lil B and Clams Casino partnering, Clams Casino doesn’t have the platform that he has today. Then someone like A$AP Rocky probably doesn’t hear him, and so his first two projects don’t have that Clams Casino sound. You look at so many artists that started to blow up in 2010, 2011, A$AP Rocky, Mac Miller, Lil B, they were really coming out with that “drop your top, relax and cruise to music,” and I think Clams Casino is a big part of all of that.

Other songs that I put on my playlist from underground artists like Reva Devito, Thatshymn, Abhi//Dijon, these are artist I listen to when I chill, or when I study. That’s what I’m trying to go for with the playlist. Just a type of sound that you don’t have to necessarily have move to it, you can just sit back, relax, and get into your own zone.

I put my song on there at the end because I thought it helped tie everything on the playlist together.

I was listening to your playlist earlier and I noticed there weren’t any real dance or turn up kind of songs on there.  I felt like they all fell into either a boom-bap category, with like eu-IV and Reva Devito, produced by Tek.Lun, the old school Kendrick, and on the other half, that Clams Casino, Abhi//Dijon, Sango, kind of relaxed and melodic category. Did you know from the start that this is the kind of theme you wanted your playlist to encompass?

Yeah absolutely. Even though some of these songs are kind of old, like “Ignorance Is Bliss,” “Realest Alive,” and “Moments In Love,” which is from the 80’s, I listen to them either every day or at least once a week. Especially times when I’m in school, studying, or in the mood to delve into my thoughts.

“Ignorance Is Bliss” is one of Kendrick’s best songs to me. Overly Dedicated does not get the recognition it deserves as a cumulative work. I personally do believe that Overly Dedicated is on the same tier as Section.80 in terms of Kendrick’s bravado and lyricism, because he’s really rapping something serious on that song. I still go back to those to projects a lot. I feel like a lot of the themes on there are universal. There’s no filler on them. You know exactly what you’re getting.

“Moments In Love” is a long song, it’s like 10 minutes long, and that version has always been my favorite. People don’t know how influential The Art Of Noise are, just to music in general. When people listen to Yeezus or My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, or some of the stuff from Michael Jackson’s HIStory album, The Art Of Noise did that stuff back in the 80’s.

I’m not super familiar with them, are they a pop group? Electronic?

They were an experimental band in the 80’s from the U.K. So many things that people are doing today, they did 30 years ago, which is mind blowing. The way “Moments In Love” is structured, you have a lot of different part, a lot of ups and downs, a lot of different breaks. And all of these breaks evoke a different emotion, and plays into the emotions that someone might feel in a relationship. When I was making this playlist, I knew it had to be number one. In my opinion it’s the best song of all time.

Wow, that’s quite the claim.

Honestly. Out of everything that I’ve ever listened to I can’t find anything, at least in my personal opinion, that really…

Evokes that same kind of emotion,

Yeah emotion, the techniques they use for the time era they were in. If you listen to other stuff from the 80’s compared to this, this is just crazy.  It’s still even really different compared to music out today. Along with that, its influence that people may or may not know about is amazing.

And then after that I went to “Realest Alive.” Lil B’s version isn’t on any streaming sites, but it’s a great song.

What era of Lil B is that?

That’s 2010 Lil B. So that’s when Lil B was just really starting to get out there. This was back when Lil B would release 5 songs a day. Literally he would release 5 different songs a day, and he would have 4 troll songs, and one song that was great. And he would do that on purpose because when he tries he’s an extremely good rapper. The thing is that he’s a deconstructionist. If you listen to Lil B from 2008/2009 he’s rapping on perfectly on the beat, but towards the end of 2009 he released “Like a Martian” and started doing all his based freestyle, stream of consciousness stuff. So during that time, this would be the 1 out of the 5 songs he’d be serious on. By 2011 he was legitimately a well known phenomenon.

Yeah I feel like around that time he was doing a lot of work with Soulja Boy, and influenced that way he made music after that. And even guys now like Lil Yachty and Lil Uzi, there’s definitely some Lil B DNA in them.

For sure. So from “Realest Alive” it goes to “Ignorance is Bliss,” which has Kendrick rapping about a whole range of different topics.  I feel like that streamlines very well into “Numb” by Clams Casino. Now from “Numb” I wanted to lighten up the mood a little bit so I went into songs that are love related. Once you get to “IVyou Pt. 2,” “Rose Gold,” “Therapy” those songs show more of a positive side of what one can feel in a relationship.

You go to “How Do You Love Me” by Xavier Omar and Sango. That song is actually about Xavier Omar asking God, “How could you even love me, even though I am the way I am, even though I am this imperfect being?” I think it segways nicely from “Therapy” because Thatshymn talks about how weed, drinking, and sex can be a form of therapy, but for Xavier Omar he’s talking about how God can be a therapy. For me. I feel like that’s a great contrast, and shows two different forms of love.

And I just finished things with “Stu Pickles.” It’s a good mellow track, talking about relaxing with friends and everyone working together to achieve their goals. For the lyrics I say, “I’m way to blessed to not stress right now,” it’s just me talking about God blessing me to be in the situation I’m in.

I think in our society we take a lot of things for granted. I saw a crazy statistic one time when I was younger. It said if you have a house with electricity, a roof over your head, a bed, and all these other commodities, you’re already richer than 75% of the people in the world.  If you think about that it’s crazy. Everyday really is a blessing, and you try your best to fill it out, and find your way to where you need to go.

What songs and artists made you want to start rapping and making your own music?

If I’m thinking about my favorite rappers growing up, Tupac is number one by a mile. Tupac was extremely influential to me. All Eyez On Me, I know that entire double album back and forth because my dad had the OG double CD that was released in 1996. So after Tupac, it’s Nas, all of his stuff. The first album I ever bought with my own money was his Untitled album. That and the Wu-Tang Clan’s 8 Diagrams. Wu-Tang Clan was also very influential to me. Enter the 36 Chambers  I know that album so well. ODB was so ahead of his time. You listen to “Brooklyn Zoo” and the way he’s rapping is so crazy, but somehow he’s perfectly in pocket, he’s perfectly on the beat. In order to rap like that is extremely hard. ODB to me is just an extraordinary rapper.

Any final thoughts on your playlist?

It’s a microcosm of me throughout the years. It represents the type of music I listen to when I’m in a pensive mood. It’s “sit down and think” music.

Connect with Victor:

https://twitter.com/viceroy_o

https://www.instagram.com/victorolalekan_/

https://soundcloud.com/victorolalekan

Connect with Moments In Song:

https://www.instagram.com/momentsinsong/

https://twitter.com/moments_in_song

https://tinyurl.com/MISAppleMusic

https://tinyurl.com/MISSpotify

[theofficialautisticgamer]

Do You Have 10 GP For A Cup Of Coffee? A "Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest" Review Played on Retroarch (SNES Emulator) Beat in 11 Hours 24 Minutes and 49 Seconds Review by TheAutisticGamer (Michael) PROS AND CONS AT THE BOTTOM! Back in the day, I was a Nintendo Kid. In fact, I still am one. I love the Nintendo Switch and I'm amazed at the comeback they made in the last few years. However, back in the day, I loved them a lot. I had a Gamecube, A Game Boy Advance, a Nintendo DS, A Wii, Nintendo 64 and SNES. One game I played on the SNES, introduced me to a huge franchise and a genre that was booming, RPGS. Final Fantasy Mystic Quest is a childhood favorite game of mine and I absolutely loved it. I haven't however, beaten it until now. So how do I feel about it now that I'm 23? The game is a entry level JRPG starring a character you can name (His actual name is Benjamin) who is the hero of the prophecy and must save the four crystals of the world and defeat the Dark King. The game has you travelling with one companion at a time including Kaeli, a tree whisperer, Tristam, a treasure hunter, Phoebe, a girl who wants to stop a winter spell that has been put on Aquaria her home and Reuben, a warrior who lives in Fireburg. Guided by a old man, Benjamin and the gang face terrible threats which leads to the climax of the game. It's a very bare bones and standard Final Fantasy game and it's not very long at all. In fact, I actually 100%'d the entire game because of how easy it was to find stuff by exploring which is incredibly rewarding in Mystic Quest. There are lots of positives to say. First, although the sprite work and graphics isn't that special, it is kind of appealing to see a Final Fantasy game with a different art style. The game's simple combat and exploration are incredibly fun. It's really awesome to get all the spells and start experimenting them on enemies. The good thing about this game is that there are no random encounters. Enemies show up on the map and you can exit at any time if your characters aren't asleep or confused or what not. Mystic Quest also has a great english translation, probably because it came out in North America first. There are rarely any typos except maybe one and that's impressive coming off a disasterous Final Fantasy IV translation. One of the cool things is that in the game, you can use weapons in the world to cut down trees, blow up entrances, climb walls, it's kind of groundbreaking for it's time that it combined action adventure elements into a turn based JRPG. There are two things I absolutely love about this game coming back to it. One is the Pazuzu boss fight which is a incredibly different boss from all the others you encounter. He has a defensive spell that counters any attack or spell used on him and you have to wait it out. It's kind of like the first boss in Final Fantasy VII to be honest and must have been an inspiration to the team working on it. The other, is the soundtrack. In my opinion, the soundtrack stands as one of the greatest video game scores of all time. The music is kick ass most of the time. Fireburg, Battle Theme 1, Doom Castle, Volcano, all fantastic songs that cement Mystic Quest as one of the great soundtracks of the 90's. I still listen to it to this day and always am amazed by it. Alright, I want to get to the negatives because there are a few. First off, the game has this chest exploitation thing where if you open and chest, leave and come back, you can open the chest again with the same items, making it super easy to get lots of heal potions and bombs. I don't know if this was a programming error they overlooked or it's actually intentional but damn it's easy to do that. Also, the game is infamous for being too easy. It's only too easy if you get the encounters you want and the bosses take some time to think. But yeah, I agree with most people that it's a pretty easy game. So the thing I want to point out is that the writing, for a JRPG at the time, is pretty bad. It seems rather rushed and forced and not much thought was put into any of the ideas. Some towns folk will give you useful information, others will just do crap all. Your party members seem to come in for plot convenience as well. Plus, the party members are one shot everything while you have to hit each enemy in two shots which can get annoying. But that ending. Christ. The ending is incredibly underwhelming and is extremely rushed. There is barely any time to breathe with this ending. It just ends to cheerful after what you've been through. It's probably one of my least favorite endings to any game ever. But, at the end of the day, I feel Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest is still worth checking out despite these flaws. The game was made at a time when RPGS were niche to introduce players to the genre and I think it did a fine job with that. I do recommend playing it especially for the kick ass soundtrack. Very enjoyable but not for everyone. 8.5/10 PROS: -Unique Graphics Style -Gameplay is simple and fun -Spells are extremely fun to use and experiment with -Easy to 100% the entire game -Pazuzu Boss fight was awesome -Groundbreaking World Weapon Use -One of the best soundtracks of all time -Great Translation -Exploring is worth it NEUTRALS: -(Unintentional?) Chest Exploitation makes the game very easy -The game is a bit too easy CONS: -Writing is really bad for a JRPG at the time -Party members are always stronger than you -Party Members seem to appear for the convenience of the plot -The ending is one of the worst I've seen for a game.