#ive always loved the hunger games and its one of those movie that i like to watch every once in a while to feel smth😌

[honeyedbrie]

I'm rewatching the hunger games for reasons and I just had a thought that really touched me: if Rue had survived with Katniss till the end, it would have been the exact same scenario as w Peeta, bc there is no way either of those two would have killed each other, but it would have made a very different story.

the fact that remains consistent through any storyline with Katniss is that she would never intentionally harm a friend, and she will protect them at all costs. so no matter who she survived with if she had an alliance, and it came down to her and her alliance, she wouldn't have been able to do it.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it was all doomed from the beginning: from the second that Effie drew Prim's name, there was no hope for the capitol.

[technowoah]

if you're taking asks for the prompts, can you do 11 and 17 from the angst list with george but have a fluffy ending? she/her pronouns pls

I Can Make It Right

SHSJS I HAVE SO MUCH ANGST IN MY INBOX YALL!

Thanks for the request babe! The way it came out was gender neutral i dont think I user she/her, but it still works trust me!

George x reader imagine (established)

11) "It's not important apparently"

17) "You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off"

⚠︎ angst with happy ending, unresolved issue but they're gonna fix it dont worry 😌, angry George, swearing

*** = flashback

Masterlist

You had stood infront of your bathroom mirror finishing up your makeup for the night. Your hair was already done and you had a nice outfit on, not to fancy and not too comfortable. While listening to a playlist George had made for you, you had put down the brushes you were using. It didnt really matter if you cleaned up your makeup that was littered all over the sink right now, but right now you were feeling good.

Today was your and George's 3rd year anniversary and you couldn't be happier about it. Today you two were going to dinner and doing something else which was supposed to be a surprise for you. It was a night on the town.

George and you met 4 years ago actually. You two started out as acquaintances, the slowly grew into friends and then one day he asked you to join him to dinner. At first you were oblivious to his actions, thinking he was just being a good friend, but turns out the more dates you two went on the more you caught on. He officially asked you to be his girlfriend 3 years ago today.

His friends keep on pressuring George to propose already, they think it's been long enough. The only thing close to marriage is a promise ring. He put the ring on your finger as a promise that one day he would marry you, everytime you doubt that he will propose you turn your attention to the cute ring on your finger.

You had turned off the bedroom lights and sat on your bed finally relaxing after struggling to find a decent enough outfit for tonight. George said that he was going to pick you up around 6:00 and now it is 5:47 so you had some time to spare.

You had found yourself scrolling through tiktok because you had nothing else better to do at this moment. It was a guilty pleasure of yours even though you and george both joked around about hating tiktok.

Time began to tick away so you had checked the clock on your phone which said 5:57 pm. You had grabbed shoes that you set up against your bed, slipped them on and grabbed all of your belongings for the night. You stationed yourself in the living room waiting till George came to the door.

Nervousness always came up before a date, it was the anticipation actually. You were excited and nervous about the date as you always were, but today for you was special. It was three years worth of beautiful love. You remembered the time he first said I love you too, it was just like it was yesterday.

***

"Hey y/n." George looked towards you. You both were sitting on a plaid, plush blanket with a brown woven basket ontop in between you two. It was just like the movies and that why you cringed because of how cheesy it was when George led you to it.

It was sweet, it was extremely sweet and you loved these dates that George always brung you too. You always felt special when you are sitting next to him.

You responded to George. "Yeah Gogy?" You laughed at the use of his nickname.

"Im trying to be serious right now and you call me Gogy." George smiled and shook his head. "Anyways, you know I love you, right?"

"Of course I do-"

"No I love you. I mean. I'm in love with you." George reached to rest his hand ontop of yours and repeated himself. "I'm in live with you y/n."

You wasted no time answering. "Im in love with you too."

***

6:03

George didnt show up yet, but there was no sweat. He was only 3 minutes late, maybe he ran into traffick. Your stomach was rumbling, but you didnt want to eat yet since you two we're planning to go to dinner. Patience is key, and it wasnt like he wasn't late before.

6:10

You started to get worried, it's been 10 minutes and still no sign of your boyfriend. You had gotton up several times to check outside of your door only to be met with no one. Your mind was jumping to conclusions about if he forgot your anniversary, but you shut those thoughts out for the time being.

6:19

Okay this is getting out of hand. You brung out our phone and began to text George, you couldn't believe that you had waited this long before texting the man.

Where are you? Ive been waiting for 29 minutes?!

[Sent: 6:20pm]

George what are you doing?

[Sent: 6:20pm]

You awaited his text message with your phone faced up on the coffee table infront of you. You didn't want to believe that George woukd forget, or overslept, but that was becoming truth the more minutes passed by with no call or text.

6:30

Calling him was useless, because he didn't answer. He didn't hang up on you he just wasn't picking up the phone, like he turned it off. You started to get worried if something happened to him, if he was in a situation where he couldn't call or text you. You wondered if he was safe at home and not out in the middle of the street.

In a flash all your worries subsided when your phone lit up with a notification.

ThisIsNotGeorgeNotFound is live:

Im Playing golf with my friends

That son of a bitch. Pissed off was an understatement, you were fuming. How could he end up streaming at home when you had constantly reminded him about this day, he knew damn well about this day too. How could he?

You ended up grabbing a jacket and your purse and ended up driving to George's place. It seemed like he was mocking you in a way, he knew you had notifications on for Twitch. You loved to support him and his career, but this was making a fool out of yourself.

Your hand tightly gripped the steering wheel as you tried not to run every red light you cane across. You finally came across George's home, you found a place to park and quickly got out of your car and sped walked your way to George's residence. Finally making up to George's door you knocked harshly on the door probably making more noise than what you intended too. You continuously banged on his door until you got fed up.

Remembering that George had given you a key to his house you dig through your purse to get your set of keys out anr unlock his door. You stomped inside his house and closed the door behind you.

"GEORGE! GEORGE!" You yelled through the house. You were being reckless and annoying, but you didnt care at this point you were fuming and needed to tell George how you feel.

You had made your way to George's recording room where he was talking to his friends on discord. George looked towards you in shock clearly not hearing the sounds you were making throughout his house.

"Y/N?!" George yelled and muted his microphone.

"What the hell are you doing?" You exclaimed back.

"Im streaming thats what Im doing!" George sassed back at you, not paying attention to his screen and the chat.

"Dont get smart with me. End the stream."

"What?! No!"

"You heard me, we need to talk." You crossed your arms across your chest. Your heart was beating too fast for your liking and you tried to calm yourself down, but George's comments were getting to you.

George was about to unmute himself and get back to the game. "No we dont-"

"GEORGE END THE FUCKING STREAM! This is embarrassing! Talk to me cause you have some explaining to do." You snapped at him.

A silence tell upon you two and he glared at you before turning to his stream and closing it out.

"Okay guys! Go watch the other boys streams I need to go now! Bye!" George quickly ended and turned off everything.

He turned around to you still sitting in his chair. "What? What do you want?"

"Do you know what today is?" You asked.

"April 30th." George answered bluntly.

"Thats all you have to say?" You asked in shock. "It's our anniversary dickhead!"

"I fucking know that." George said.

"You do? So why did you start streaming and we had dinner plans?!"

"I told you we were streaming! You weren't listening to me!" George stood up from his chair when he said that.

"When the fuck did you tell me this?!"

"A couple days ago! You didn't listen!"

"But you knew that was our anniversary! And we made dinnerr plans-"

George yelled over you. "A month ago! We made those plans a month ago so excuse me for forgetting!"

"So all these other years you remembered our anniversary and went out of your fucking way to cancel other plans around that date, but today you didnt because why?!" Tears were threatening to fall down you cheeks, but you wouldnt let him see you like that.

"Because I planned this already with the boys! And AGAIN you werent listening to me when I said that-"

"There were several other times that you could've told me too! But you didn't!" You sniffed trying to keep the frustrated tears inside.

"I already planned this and I cant go back on my promise-"

"But you can with me?!" You yelled and George stopped talking. He's just studying your face at this point and you hated this silence.

"Its not important apparently." You said while walking out of the recording room.

"You're being a bitch." He mumbled.

"Excuse me?! That is so disrespectful!" You spun around yelled at him.

"You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off." George said in a annoying tone.

"Yeah you should feel like shit! I feel like shit too so-!" You threw your hands up in exasperation and stormed out the room. You had made it to the door before George called out to you again.

"Y/n! Y/n! Please!"

"No! Just..." You paused before opening the door and ushering your way out. "Call me when you get your shit together.

You were currently curled up on your couch eating leftovers that you had in the refrigerator. That had satisfied your hunger for the night because the dinner was canceled that night. Your anger and sadness had subsided and you were only left with an unusual feeling in your heart. Your relationship felt incomplete, this fight felt incomplete. You didnt break up with him, but you were waiting for closure.

The TV was the only light in the room. It illuminated what it wanted to, you didnt care if it was too dark. Usually you would be cuddled up with George at this ungoldy hour, but you weren't and that made you tear up.

Your sadness was still there, your anger towards George turned into pity. You were sad about the actions he took, but somewhere in your heart you could forgive him. You could forgive and move on if he would come to you.

Speaking of, you had a knock on your door. You didn't have the strength to get up, but you did. Shuffling your way to the door you sluggishly opened it to find George standing there with his hands in his hoodie. The person you wanted to see, but at the same time you wanted to slam that door in his face.

"Hey." George spoke and you gave him a small smile, nothing more.

You turned around to find your seat back on the couch where you were comfortable, but also giving him a silent invitation to come inside. You had sat down on the couch not paying attention to George, but you knew he closed the door, took off his shoes by yours, and put his keys on the table by the door like he always did. It was like a routine to him.

George ended up awkwardly standing beside the couch as you ignored him.

"You know, if you didnt open the door I would've used my keys like you did." George tried to spark up a conversation, but you only hummed in response. You were scared that if you spoke, you would cry.

George ended up making his way to the couch sitting beside you and pulling you into his embrace. Your head was on his chest and you began to sob. You missed this it's only been a few hours, but you had felt that in those few hours you had lost everything. You continued to sob into his hoodie as he rubbed your back and shushed you, whispering sweet nothings into the air only for you to hear.

"Im here, and Im sorry. Im so fucking sorry that I did this to you and I only hope that you can forgive me." George said, his voice cracking a little when he said that. You kept crying.

That's what you wanted to hear all along, that's what you needed. You could forgive him in due time, you always will because you love him, you will always love him. You both can always make it right.

[petruchio]

ok so once in a while i see one of your hunger games posts on my dash & i think to myself "hm. i should really get around to reading those books someday" well! i started the first book last night & just finished it & oh my god. i'm torn between regretting not reading it at the height of its popularity & knowing that i wouldn't have appreciated it as much at the time. what a story! even though i knew who lived & who died (i think i've seen the movie) it was riveting & brutal & touching the whole way through & tbh i was expecting to roll my eyes a bit about katniss & peeta (bc i was under the impression that that got played up a lot when the movie was made & overshadowed what the book is "actually" trying to say) but. peeta is so so sweet & his love is very compelling & i adore him. & katniss & cinna & even haymitch of course! i wish i could just stop reading now because i know more shit happens to katniss in the following books but also! i haaave to know what happens! i was never a YA fiction reader but this one for sure deserved all the acclaim it got. anyway thank you for posting about this story haha i'm so glad i'm reading it! at long last!

aH this makes me so happy!!!! first of all i admire that you have been able to put up with my hunger games posting for this long and not unfollowed me but second of all i am so happy that you were able to find the time to read the books!!! i know ive gone on and on about them but ugh i just truly adore them so im always so happy to hear when other people love them too :’) and yes ya fiction is a mixed bag and tbh the only relatively recent ones that are truly worth their hype are original pjo and thg i said what i said…

anyway just YES to everything you’ve said i don’t want to say any more because i want you to read the other books too ;););) but yes… katniss and peeta… they are just *it* they have it all i love them SO much it’s insane. like i know im insane about them but it’s because THEYRE WORTH IT sjdjsjsjsn anyway thank you for sending this to me it makes me SO HAPPY!!!💕💕💕

[dealbrekker]

Hey, I'm wondering if you have any good recommendations for books, movies or series? I followed you for soc and you seem to have a lot of other interesting fandoms and interests.

I like fantasy, but I don't want the world to be too different from our world. I like mysteries and paranormal stuff mostly but I can't seem to find any good ones lately. More realistic ones are good and I think that I need to read or watch more stuff like that.

I prefer if it has some of my favourite tropes like found family. Not too much romance or anything else.I read mainly YA but I really need to expand my taste more. I prefer series to be quite long but still bingeable. Movies are always good.

If you want to help me then that would be wonderful and I want to say thank you even before you answer.

Hello! I'd LOVE to give you some recommendations! I went through my goodreads and my own bookshelves to see what I have that match your interests and have compiled the following list!

Books/Series:

The Amelia Peabody mysteries by Elizabeth Peters: these are my most favorite books by my most favorite author. They're historical fiction/mysteries set in the 1880s to the 1920s Egypt. There are 20 books in the series. They're fantastic if you want a brilliant main character who is sassy, fun, smart, and crazy intelligent. There is some romance peppered in throughout, but this is extremely well done and isn't the main point of the books. Nothing explicit in the least either. Along the way more characters are introduced and become part of the found family trope. This series was started in the late 1970s. I highly recommend all of Elizabeth Peters' books, as well as those under her other pen name, Barbara Michaels. The first book in the Amelia mysteries is called Crocodile on the Sandbank. Not YA.

The Mercy Thompson series by Patricia Briggs: I'm a couple books behind in this paranormal/suburban fantasy series, but love it so much. There are currently around 11 books or so. Again, there is some romance, but the mysteries and supernatural elements are at the foreground. Werewolves, shapeshifters, vampires, the fae, and more feature. Mercy is a certified badass mechanic and coyote shapeshifter. First book is called Moon Called. Not YA.

The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater. Now these you probably know and have possibly already read. Supernatural/paranormal YA series heavily featuring the found family trope. Beautiful and weird and just delicious. These books, for me at least, are more about the characters than the plot. First books is The Raven Boys.

The Constellation Trilogy by Claudia Gray: YA sci-fi! I'm not big on sci-fi but this wonderful trilogy is a fantastic way to dip your toe into the genre. It has one of my favorite characters I've come across in recent years, Abel Mansfield. He is the most darling, socially awkward Android you'll ever meet. First book is called Defy the Stars.

The Flavia de Luce series by Alan Bradley. This isn't YA but the main character is an 11 year old chemistry prodigy. She's fun and whip smart and has a nose for solving murder cases much to the local Inspector's chagrin. I think there are 9 or 10 in this series so far. The first is called The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie

The Strange the Dreamer duology by Laini Taylor. Exquisite. Just gorgeous. The books read like a dream. Fantasy but not too fantasy. I'd consider these on the cusp of YA and whatever is above YA. The characters are in their mid to late teens, but it's a bit like SoC where the writing lends itself to an older audience. The first is Strange the Dreamer.

The Red Rising Saga by Pierce Brown. This is also a YA leaning more toward adult. Loosely I'd describe the first book, Red Rising, as Hunger Games on Mars. I've only read the first 3 books, but UGH the characters. UGH the action. Definitely has Found Family going on in it. If memory serves it can be a little graphic in the action and violence but isn't the worst I've ever read. More sci-fi that isn't too sci-fi.

Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson. Okay so here is where I deviate. This is higher fantasy than what I've recommended thus far. It's sprawling world building at its finest. That being said, it's still really humans, just on a different world where the plant and animal life is different. These are very long books, but just phenomenal. The cast of characters are incredible, the plots engaging. If you want to read this series, give it the time it deserves. Ive only read the first 2, and there are 4 currently. Sanderson has tons of other books and series that take place in the same universe, if I'm not mistaken, but I've only read the Stormlight Archive books so far. The first one is called The Way of Kings.

The Kingkiller Chronicles by Patrick Rothfuss. Same disclaimer as the last one. More high fantasy. Tbh, I havent read these in a long, long time, but very much enjoyed them. A bit more complex as far as the magic, but the plot and characters are amazing so I wanted to mention them. First one is called The Name of the Wind and there are only 2 so far.

Shows:

Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries (on acorn TV and possibly bbca): 3 seasons of utter delight. Fun and flirty and moving. Takes place in the 1930s I believe, in Australia. Follows Phryne Fisher as she bursts her way into solving murders much to Inspector Jack Robinson's dismay. These two are AMAZING partners, no matter how reluctant. This is also a book series, but I haven't read them and have actually heard many people say they prefer the show

Lucifer (on Netflix.): I'm behind and I'm upset that I'm behind. Follows one cheeky devil as he assists a reluctant Detective Chloe Decker solve crimes (I am starting to see a theme in my own interests 😆). Funny but so emotionally moving as Lucifer navigates his way through his own humanity

Prodigal Son. Season 2 starts in January. It airs on Fox so I'm not sure off the top of my head where you can find season 1 readily available. Highly recommend. Follows Malcolm Bright, a serial killer Profiler for the NYPD. His father is a very famous serial killer, and he often gets tips from dear old dad to aid in his cases. Malcolm has tons of ptsd and trauma to work through, so the show touches upon these themes heavily.

Movies:

To be perfectly honest, I'm not a movie expert of any kind. I just watch what looks interesting to me. But my all time favorite movies are the 1999/2000 The Mummy and The Mummy Returns with Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz. Just pure joy when I watch. Fun and so very quotable.

I also adore the Thin Man series from the 40s starring William Powell and Myrna Loy. Those 2 are absolutely relationship goals. So fun and sassy. A husband and wife crime solving team with a sassy dog named Asta.

This was so fun to put together for you! Let me know if you have anymore questions about anything I listed! Take care and happy reading/viewing!

[deadpooly]

✨ otps & notps tag game ✨

i was tagged by the lovely and amazing @sunflowrsix to cause mayhem because i ship a lot of ships and ive had anons in the past have a problem with that so this is gonna be fun !!

top OTPs (idk how many to include so ill just go with whats at the top of my head)

steve rogers & tony stark (marvel) - come on, they were my very first otp when i entered fandom. they are literally canonically together in the comics (earth-3490) and every universe they are in together is too great!! all the fics!!! so good!

peter parker & wade wilson (marvel COMICS) - or alternatively spideytorch! i love them so much they are such idiots!! i have their whole team up comic series half in hardcover and i love it too much! together they are so fucking hilarious and goofy how could i not love them?

finn & poe dameron (star wars sequal trilogy) -  how could i not??? i watched rise of skywalker and every scene i was like “fuck these two belong together” 

elizabeth swan & will turner (pirates of the carribbean) - watching potc im always rooting for them so hard even though i know how the movie ends skdhbkj elizabeth is such a badass and will is always ready to lay his life down for her! one of my fav het otps (and i have very few of those)

harley quinn & poison ivy (dc) - what a powerful couple. they are both stunning as hell and they are truly some of my favourite characters to watch or read about! theres just something about them!!

katniss and peeta (the hunger games) - i watched teh hunger games for the first time like last month and i loved it so much! especially the dynamic between these two  it was just really amazing and had me in my feels

bonus! stevebuckytony (marvel) - allow me to elaborate, uh okay uhm this is mainly because i read an ot3 fic for them i really loved it so like yep

other random ships i love: rhodeytony, buckyclint, buckynat, stevenatbucky, sambucky, harleypeter, buckytony

im putting the next part under the cut!!

top NOTPs

starker (marvel) - (literally i will not explain this i cant believe its even a thing)

natasha romanoff & bruce banner (marvel) - i really hate marvel for trying to give natasha a romantic partner, and bruce of all people? (i love bruce banner dw) it just didnt make sense and was kind of crappy. if nat is gonna have a love interest id prefer it to be bucky barnes with the comic book storyline

rey & kylo ren (star wars) - idk it really felt forced (aha pun not intended) and i just couldnt see them together

tony stark and loki (marvel) - okay, i could  read a fic with them but i would purposely do that i just dont see it and i know one of the most popular marvel fics on ao3 is this ship and oof

tony stark & stephen strange (marvel) - i never liked this ship idk theres just no balance its just- i just dont vibe with it and thats okay!

i cant think of any other notps at the moment but this is it!

i'm tagging: @capfalcon @thefightingdragon @jcssicacruz @girlnic @minetra @hey-its-grey and im actually struggling with who to tag so if u see this just do it cause its fun lmao (also if you are tagged you do not have to do this if you dont want to)

[riskeith]

hehe, hi!! hope you slept well even if you stayed up until 3-4 am (?) also what fic... what paring... 👀

genshin charas be like: *wavy beautiful flowy deep hair* tbh and we just gotta accept that. just keep practicing and i’m sure you’ll do them more than justice. your stuff is already great so far!! I JUST SAW HIS ISLE ANIMATION RAZOR IS LITERALLY BEST BOY? also his voice actor... ☹️🥺 razor is catboy we love it.

i’m gonna run around with him and just think about you always i promise!!!! [as if i don’t do that already hehe 😏] some day it will be i’m actually hopefully they’ll do it. too many people want cross server they cannot pass that up.. :(

thank u!! hehe, it’s a tododeku piece and it was one of my first bnha fics i started working on. basically it’s a radio au? i love those so much... midoriya’s a radio host and todoroki listens to him to help his insomnia and they start talking and it’s basically Yearning... jshdjdhdkd this one is actually one of those fics ive always wanted to do but felt stuck with multiple times shdjdsshdh but i don’t wanna let it die just yet so we’ll see what i’ll do with it. and yeah!!! long fics are super intimidating. i agree with everything you said lmao. the stuff i post is actually only one shots. multi-cap scares the fuck out of me bc what if you just lose motivation and then there are people that are waiting for updates and aaah. when i used to do longer fics i used to write it all out before posting the chapters that way i was Sure it was all done. most of my longer fics just end up never leaving my drive account because of that reason.. i literally have fics with over 20k words that have just died out... yikes. hahahah. and omg imagine a wip dump i’d read them all!! who knows what gold your big brain has hidden from us....

YOU HAVE A STUDY? now that’s just sexy of you. stop i feel like people that study at home in a specific office are studious. there’s something super fancy about having a work space at home... and a bookshelf my god what a dream... 😍 books are the most important!!!!! my makeup is hidden in a makeup bag so it doesn’t touch them. i’d literally cry if anything happened to any of them shsjdjk. your bookshelf said 2013 vibes and i adore it. all of those are such good vibes tbh i can’t believe you have them at home... awww <3 do you like the movie adaptions as well?

what happens after 12 yo? do you have secondary school?

I HAVE NO CLUE... god albedo so gorgeous. we’ve just been praising him for days and i’m still not tired of him. he’s so perfect!!!!! if he comes back another time i’m definitely gonna go for it. also AHH? i cant wait for the razor pic aaah you made me so excited now... <3

i made a asia server acc earlier!! god it feels so weird to start anew sjdkdhdk all the tutorials.. not having wings... nothing. just paimon and me running around in the whispering woods. kind of tedious actually but gotta do it for the wifey.. 🥰 i’m thinking i’m gonna hustle hard this weekend to hopefully get up at least to level 10 or something. omg we are literally gonna be that meme where the short person stands in front of taller person and says “they asked for no pickles”... have you seen them? i suck at explaining shjdjdjd anyway. CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU PLAY... 😍 the homoerotic tension in the domains... 😍 also i was thinking,. we get a lot of primogems early in the game and i’m gonna try to spin for xingqiu so we can have that date after all... 😏

YOU HAVE 5 ACCS? my girl is booked and busy. can i ask what for help... also do you ever tweet the wrong things on the wrong accs? and idk what a moment is but i’d absolutely watch that. i wanna see ur cute screenshots... 🥺 YOUR THEME IS SOOOOOO FUCKING GOOD!!!!! ohdhsjshsjshsjsj it’s soooo fucking nice I LOVE IT the colors and the pose. THE MOON ABOVE HIS HEAD. mark me as in love... 🥺

it’s me who cannot wait to hear from YOU. i can’t stop thinking about how soon we’ll run around together aaaah... <3333

i finished responding to your ask at like 3am and slept then!! it was.... drarry 😳😳 they’re legitimately all i read these days even tho i have like one (1) knowledge about hp and its lore FHDKFHSDFJSDKKHSD just the enemies to lovers dynamic you know??? ugh 😩😘👌

fjksdfh thank!! HE’S THE BESTEST BOY!! lil pup 🥺🥺 AND HERE’S THE IMAGE: 

LOOK AT HIM M.A. LOOK!!!!!!!!!!! dont you just want to give him everything <333 all the wolfhook he wants... all the good pats... 😭😭😭😭

hehe <33 and hopefully some day!!! i think realistically they wouldn’t, but one can hope hfsdkfhkdsjkh

:o concept! oooo does todoroki know it’s midoriya or is he just pining for the mystery radio show host 😩🤪 i hope you’re able to keep it alive! ahaha ganbatte plus ultra 💪💪💪 you 🤝 me sticking to one-shots. fjdslfkj damn writing it ALL before posting tho requires so much patience... that’s so admirable.... im legit so hungry for like attention and validation from my fics i can’t not post fhdsfsdhsdhk even if it’s still a wip... and the giving up on a multichap i’ve done that LOLLLLLLLLLL i was so in denial about it too even tho i knew i was never gonna go back to it i went from pretending it didnt exist to announcing a hiatus to then announcing its discontinuation fhdskfjsdkjfskdhfdsks

FHSKFHSDKJ ye!! ahah actually now that you say it like that ... makes me sound so profesh 😩 nice! that’s good protect the books first and foremost hfksdhkfs. 2013 was a vibe too i reckon.. that was when catching fire came out <333 which relates to your question, i do *mostly* like the movie adaptations! if i watch the movies before the books then it’s all good, but if i’ve already read the books and then i go into the adaptation..... yikes HSHAH but sometimes it’s been so long i forget the book plot so it’s alright. i do think the hunger games adaptations were really good though!!! hbu do you like the movies?

yup we call it high school!! and that goes from 13-18 yo. 

albedo... always on the mind 🥰🥰🥰 i think once i get xiao i might maybe roll of every banner after? just to try LOL idkk. 

!! im so sorry you have to go through all that tedious stuff again 😭😭😭 but im so thankful 😍😍😍😍 once you reach co-op levels dw we can do all the quests together so you won’t have to suffer through them with difficulty 🤪 and no i didn’t know that meme but i just looked it up and omg that energy... can’t wait for that to be us :p XINGQIU!!! im so excited omg.. that was one of the other reasons i was willing to start again so i could try roll him fshfksjd. channeling luck for you so you get him again!!! and then chongyun can be with the boyf <33 

5 but only 3 i use!!! my kpop twt, anime, and then my ‘main’ (for posting just fics and art etc). the other 2 are basically just there to save URLs hfskdfhskd. and no i don’t!! im super conscientious about that bc im so paranoid hfkshfsdfhsdfjksdhfks y’all won’t catch me slipping 🤪 and a moment is basically just a collection of tweets! but i realised you actually need to tweet them first for that to happen fshfhsdkfd but here are some thumbnails!

THANK UUUU chongyun really is my muse.. who needs irl photography when i can do all this in game <33333 

ME NEITHER!! you got me smiling like a fool just thinking about it... hope you slept well! mwah :*

[honestlyawesome]

jokes on you i got tagged in 2 different memes by @freddy-krueger​ so prepare yourself three ships: OKAY.... hm.. well in 2016 i realized sonadow was so god tier perfect and now with time i know that will always be true, even if i’m not actively into sonic anymore. second ship,, uh BATJOKES always god it goes off. and finally axmarco is always cute, but i don’t hate any animorphs pairing tbh bc i love those hoes. im just kinda on the axmarco bs rn

last song i listened to: by now i’m listening to a new song, it’s the cult of dionysus by the orion experience! listen to it its good and an earworm gem graveyarding and me also got into 100 gecs together so i’m bopping to a lot of their stuff

last movie i watched: the first hunger games with my friends @opti-mized​ and @graveyardfullofteeth​ !!

currently reading: im finishing the hunger games trilogy bc my friends and i agreed to reread it together! thats why we’re watching the movies too :) I’m also reading animorphs bc I never finished the whole series as a kid, so it’s a partial reread. AAAANd im kind of reading warriors but not really, just getting refamiliarized with the canon bc i’m also writing a warriors rpg story to do with previously mentioned friends 😳

currently watching playing: OMG i just realized I haven’t watched a show in so long... im planning to watch beastars but i’m not doing it yet so it doesnt count. im changing this question to playing bc ive been on my gamer bullshit lmao. I’ve been playing a LOT of minecraft with opti opti-mized on a server in a sparkledog community im in. and we’re also on and off playing through hiveswap friendsim!! i love tagora sm :)

currently consuming: strawberry poptarts.. i like the fruit flavored ones the best but i think my favorite is blueberry tho

currently craving: my sisters takis that are sitting on the counter,,

tagging: you all again its a 2 part special @amishdyke​ @opti-mized​ @graveyardfullofteeth

[brinesystem]

list, tw

I saw this on someone else’s blog (im not saying names cause idk if its okay to share that info? it was public but still) and it uh

It looked like a good way to kinda, like, have a bit less doubt? or a way to remind myself of whats happening and why i think i have this? idk

Might be triggering so like probs scroll past or something

‘the moods’ existed before i knew about did/osdd

I used to describe them as “it feels like half me, but also half somebody else”

I argue and talk with my own thoughts

Sometimes I talk/argue /aloud/ with my own thoughts

I have to actively fight to /convince/ Fae to talk to people, else he wont. and even when he does, its not how i want it to sound

I cant remember most of my childhood

The /bad/ middle school was when i was either 9 or 10

I knew too much about sex when i was much too young (7, 8)

I get ages wrong (i was 6 in cali, not 8. why do i think it was 8?)

I had a dream about getting raped when I was in elementary school. I didnt fight back. I didnt feel anything at all

I used to hide under desks

I hated my therapist. Its now fear. I dont remember what it was back then

I forget memories I recall, and if I force them back, everything hurts, even if theyre not traumatic

I often forget that I used to forget bad things that happened to me.

Other sex dreams from elementary school

The csa I /do/ remember (freshman). Why did i seek that out. Why did it seem like a good plan

I used to forget conversations daily

I drew myself (sebastian, older brother, nicer) before I knew i was trans. I dont have many memories from before I came out/knew i was trans. (am i an alter?)

Used to daydream for hours due to nerves. Disocciating?

The bathroom incident (middle school. 9 - 10)

How old are you? “16″ i reply this randomly when i am 23. when i was 21. Even when I know I am not

The HS trauma that happened right

I don’t have triggers for my trauma, except sometimes i /do/

Hypersexual, but only /sometimes/

I’m an adult! Except sometimes when my body is much too big and I am much too tall and I only want to curl up and be left /alone/. Except when i am small and fragile and want to have stuffed animals around me and play animal crossing. Except then.

Opinions keep changing, but to set differing ones. (Fashion sense, humor, hobbies, aesthetics)

Scared of dad! Not scared of dad. Pity dad. Could kill dad. Scared of dad! Not s-

Handwriting/Art/Writing style changes a lot (fluctuates between set stops)

Randomly gains accents and loses them. Only happens with two accents even though I know many

Stims change depending on Mood

Cant recognize myself in the mirror, but ideal keeps changing in set patterns (soft lumberjack, fae prince, cutesy, fashionable andro, suited devil)

Fave colors, songs, movies change in set patterns

Numb sensations to VERY INTENSE sensations. Cannot predict

Edible food changes depending on mood, even including safe foods (mac n cheese vs mussels vs ramen, etc)

What is this emotion? idk

Who am i? idk

I know I was bullied. Don’t remember why I know

Trying to think about my childhood makes me panic or get a headache

Super depressed after mental break ; Suddenly snapped out of it emotionally

That one time I slept for 3 days straight

Posture and walk cycle keeps changing

Gets songs stuck in my head that I’m not thinking about

Gets songs stuck in my head that i can’t even hear

Remembers things with no context given (the movie. “which movie” i dont know. “what was it about? who was in it? what was the title? what did it look like?” i dont know)

Bad sense of time, but like, days/hours can = months/years

“so mature for my age”

The Moods can be triggered into appearing, but not always by things I relate to them (ie; Kos and Fae)

Personality test results keep changing. All of them

False memories (the cliff, talking to the old woman about marriage, who knows what else)

Caught off guard by my own thoughts and even words I say (”sehb is gonna be mad at me for this, lol” “ACRRRRRYLICS”)

Most of my childhood memories are actually photos or stories ive heard

That dissociative test where I scored in the middle, but closer to DID than OSDD

Opinion on myself and my own looks varies

Opinion on my past varies

I dont recognize my own voice sometimes (is it changing? or is it my perception?)

Numb regarding pain, but then hypersensitive to it later

Numb regarding loss, skips straight to acceptance

Cant shiver normally, but sometimes can even when its not cold

Cant feel hunger normally, but sometimes can?

Favorite season and holidays change (summer, beach! autumn, cool air! halloween! no, valentines day!)

I dont feel connected to my family except my mum and maybe my youngest sister. These were /choices/ I made

Empathy? Dont know her. Except when I randomly start crying when others are sad, which always comes at different times but similar Moods

Cares about appearance one day, couldnt care less the next

Fave jacket: Green denim! Nope, today fave jacket: Grey hoodie! Nope, today f-

Headaches. So many headaches

More headaches when dealing with trauma

I doubt myself and worry I’m lying. Liars wouldnt do that, right?

Known to dissociate

Forget things mid sentence

Used ‘we’ when talking about myself at random before considering OSDD

Cant dream, except when I can and they dont feel like /mine/

Used to speak aloud with myself practicing words. Was I alone? idk

Loves animals. One of the Moods doesnt care at all about animals, even Wander

Loves video games. One of the moods detests video games

Loves horror games. Randomly feels intense fear from horror games

I know i was bullied, i know dad didnt come home on xmas, i know i moved a lot, i know i was in dc during 9/11, the ocean incident, the doctor incidents, I vaguely recall M(on base friend with older brother) and how she treated me (broke my glasses), i know i had a horrible time during that one year of middle school even though I only remember Two Moments (bathrooms, trailer) but I don’t necessarily have the memories of all of the things I know I dealt with

Memories are like snapshots or still moments, and dont continue

Memories I know effected me emotionally, I feel detached from now, except when i’m randomly Not (the koi, the caterpillar, not punching dad, etc)

Didn’t have friends until second year of middle school, those friends were bad, so were the hs friends

Ignored most things that happened but would randomly become enraged at smaller things that happened to me

The time on base I thought all adults driving by were pedophiles (i was 7. 8. why did i think that. why did i want to goad them? what was wrong with me??)

Keep forgetting memories like 81, but when I remember them theyre hard to get out of my head

“you acted so differently as a kid, what happened”

The Tics in response to stress

Was good at the doctors and then suddenly wasnt at all. Now am afraid

Was fine with bugs and then suddenly wasnt. Now am afraid

The fact that I dont remember typing ‘at all’ on 85

Lost old friend. Didnt mourn, still get a queasy feeling when I think about her/am reminded of her, but not upset or sad usually

Can connect most of the Moods to triggers, traumas, or coping methods, including myself

Reaction to trauma changed literally overnight

Used to love being tickled, now makes me panic (fight/flight)

Can feel when the Moods take something they see into themselves (was told this is normal. i am not faking this, at the very least)

I dont like lying. Fae doesnt/cant lie. Luci /enjoys/ lying.

Used to think solely in images. Now think solely in words.

Can sometimes hear thoughts before i think them, but only my own

Randomly gets worse coordination in turns with moods, and then gains it back after

Too trusting, but then gets in a mood and doubts even my closest friends

People keep telling me what im describing sounds like osdd, even friends who have met some of the Moods

I have an easier time remembering some things when I’m in different Moods

Used to have more amnesia before I started recognizing the Moods (was that me switching out?)

[whumptasticwednesday]

The Mind Of A Mutt (Hunger Games - Mockingjay)

Alright guys, As promised, Whumptastic Wednesday has returned. 

Just some background, this fanfic takes place during Mocking Jay Part One. I do reference some stuff from the books that weren't in the movie, so if you haven't read the books and you are confused, then read the damn books because they are incredible (AND VERY WHUMPY!!!) That’s all for now. Please enjoy, and don’t forget to give me some feedback. I would love to know what you guys think. 

-Jimmy

Word Count- 2,299

Warings- violence 

The cold floor of the cell sends goosebumps crawling up my arms. My hairs stand on edge, and every couple seconds my whole body twitches. The tracker jacker venom runs thick through my veins from the last "session." That's what they call them: President Snow and his team of doctors and nurses. Their only objective is to keep me alive long enough to torture me, to damage my brain and fill my head with artificial memories meant to brake me. Day in and day out, they show me pictures of Katniss, her voice rings through my head as they beat me. I have violent hallucinations of her doing unspeakable things to me. I feel every second of it. Why can't they kill me? Send my conscious mind into a desolate never-ending state of nothingness, because that's too easy. Nothing in the capital is easy. That's why twenty-four kids are sent to the Hunger Games every year. Because somewhere in Snow's sick distorted perception of reality, watching kids slaughter each other and celebrating the victors whos lives will be forever plagued with nightmares and flashbacks, is the only way to keep the districts in line. The only way to hold off the rebellion. Well, not anymore.

Katniss is the rebellion, the Mockingjay, and President Coin has got her. She's the reason I'm tortured in a cell in the capital. Katniss is the rebellions weapon, and I'm the capitals weapon. The only difference is never-ending suffering experienced by those saved by the capital. They are turning me into a Mutt, wearing me down little by little till I snap. Until my mind reaches depths of madness incomprehensible by a sain human. This issue is, it's working. Every day I feel my self becoming angrier and angrier. With every injection, every beating, every drop of my blood spilt, my anger grows. I can feel it festering in the back of my mind.

I try to sit up, but my arms feel week and numb. My vision begins to look fuzzy, and my eyelids feel heavy. The black polished shoes of President Snow standing in front of me is the last thing I can remember before I finally let my eye's close. In seconds I'm overtaken by sleep.

I inhale sharply as my eye's shoot open. Where am I? How long was I out? My breathing quickens as I try to move. My arms and legs are strapped into a chair. My heart begins to rase in my chest as I thrash violently, trying to escape.

"Don't struggle," I shoot my head up. President Snow is standing in front of me, two doctors wearing all white at his side. "You will only make it worse."

I grit my teeth. I've been here before. I know what's going to happen. I'm so tired, so fucking tired.

"Please." I plea, hot tears well up in my eyes. "Please, not again. I can't take this anymore." My voice cracks as I look up at President Snow. His cold face is unnerving. His dead stare sends a shiver down my spine. He nods, signaling to the doctors that its time. The doctors in their clean white coats approach me. I close my eye's, hoping that maybe if I think hard enough, this might all have just been a bad dream. I could wake up in a cold sweat, next to Katniss in our house in the victor's village. We could spend the morning talking about my nightmare like we always do when one of us has a distressing dream.

The prick of the IV being inserted into my arms knocks me back to reality. Reminds me that I'm not in my bed, I'm strapped to a chair in the capital, and I'm definitely not dreaming. I hold my breath as a cold liquid fills my veins. Suddenly my head feels like it's a thousand pounds. I let gravity do the work as my head goes limp against my chest. All at once, my ears begin to ring, louder, and louder, and louder. I squeeze my eyes shut. I think my eardrums might burst. I bring my knees to my chest and my hands to my ears, my throat letting out a blood-curdling scream. As abruptly as it began, it was over. Replaced with a silence that's equally as uncomfortable. I open my eyes, my arms and legs are free, I'm not in the capital anymore, I'm in the cave, from the first games. I prop my self up on my elbows; I look down, my wound is as bad as ever. Blood and pus seep out of the jagged cut — my whole body aches. Sweat drips down my face, and I have to bite my lip to stop from screaming.

"K-Katness," I pant, the pain is worse than the first time I experienced it. "Katn-ness, p-p-please!" I call out, where is she? Why isn't she here with me? Abruptly she appears beside me.

"I've brought you a treat. I found a patch of berries a little farther downstream" she says, brushing the hair from out of my face. Not again, I am not falling for this trick again. Katniss brings a spoonful of the mashed berries up to my mouth. This time they look different. Not red, and they don't smell like the sleeping syrup my mom used to give me. The mash is jet black. NightLock. Katniss is trying to kill me. I back away, dragging the lower half of my body with my arms. A malignant smile creeps onto Katness' face as she traps my neck under her arm. I choke and scream, trying to kick her off of me.

"Shhhhhhh, it will be over before you know it," She whispers, prying my jaw open like its nothing. I cringe as the sour taste of the nightlock berries hit my tongue. I heave as Katniss lifts her arm from off my throat. My relief is short-lived as she instantaneously clamps her hand over my mouth and plugs my nose. "This doesn't have to be difficult. One swallow. One swallow and all this pain will be over."

Nightlock, dead before it even hits your stomach, I remember. I fight underneath her. My lungs burn; they are screaming at me for oxygen. Black spots start the cloud my vision. I'm going to die. Whether that's from asphyxiation, or nightlock was my choice. I finally give in. My throat burns as I swallow. Katniss releases her hands from over my mouse and nose, and I gag and choke. My limbs start to feel heavy; the world around me begins to spin. I can see Katniss mouthing words to me. Why can't I hear her? I can feel her brush my hair out of my face. The pain I once felt begins to splinter away into a raw numbness. Soon the only thing I can discern is my heartbeat. Slow and unnatural. Like the heartbeat of a mutt.

Catching me off guard, the pounding in my ears begins to quicken. As I come back to my senses, I can hear my self gasping for breath. My vision returns soon after my hearing. I see the world speeding past me. More specifically, I see trees speeding past as I sprint through the forest. I feel like I'm not in control of my body. My lungs are on fire, and my muscles feel like they are threatening to snap. But I keep running. Suddenly my head shoots backward, and I know all too well what I'm running from. Mutts. A huge wolf-like creature is sprinting close behind me. But there is something different. I remember the mutts who chased after me in the first games. How could I forget? But this wolf was different, but at the same time... familiar. The smooth brown coat and piercing stern green eyes were all I had to see. This mutt was Katniss. Similar to the wolfs the capital made from the dead tributes in the first games. Katniss was hunting me. And I bet anything, that one stumble, and she wouldn't hesitate to rip me limb from limb. The forest floor becomes a minefield of sticks, rocks, and other things I can't identify given my current situation, but would undoubtedly lead to my inevitable demise if I were unable to avoid them. I feel in control of my body again. The first thing I notice is that the adrenaline that kept me running fast enough to stay ahead of the mutt has warn off. I'm starting to fall behind. Humans weren't built for this kind of physical exertion — my whole body cramps with every wheeze of my exasperated lungs. I feel my eyes begin to roll back into my head. My brain feels like static. Any minute my body is going betray me. I'm knocked back to reality as my foot gets caught on a rock, sending me tumbling down the steep hill. A scream tears through me as the mutt's teeth sink into my leg, dragging me down the hill. Blood smears the dirt behind me as the wolf finally slows down, stopping in the middle of the forest. Pained sobs erupt from deep within my chest. I scream through clenched teeth as the mutt's jaw opens, releasing teeth that were buried deep within my leg. Without warning, it lunges at me, teeth showing, ropes of drool cascading down its chin. I hear a sickening crunch as it jumps on me with all its weight. Hot tears spill down my cheeks as blood bubbles up my throat, leaking out my mouth. I kick and thrash, trying to release my self from under its weight, but I'm too weak. It snarls and snaps at me. I put up my arms in defense, trying to cover my face. Within minutes, my arms are a blood bath. Full of bite marks and cuts. I wail as the rabid dog rips me to pieces. I begin to lose feeling in my limbs, and my vision starts wavering in and out. I'm too weak to defend my self. Deep lacerations scatter my body. It's Tearing into me like I'm nothing but it's next meal. All the while, I stare into its eyes. Katniss' eyes. I feel my mind begin to deteriorate. Please end this. Please end me. I can't take this anymore. My body slowly slips into an empty numbness; this feeling isn't new. This is how most of my hallucinations end, with a numb body and a broken mind. My vision abandoned me a long while ago. Leaving me alone with my thoughts. It's hard to describe how I feel in these moments. When my body is numb and my brain has shut off anyway for me to identify where I am or what's going to happen next. My mind is in such a drug-induced haze; it's forgotten how to perceive the world around me. My eye suddenly shift as sporadic visions of Katniss and Gale flash into my brain. No, please, no. Like my own private movie under my eyelids, I watch Katniss and Gale laughing and smiling as they touch each other in a lust-filled haze. Please make it stop. Every touch, every kiss, fuels a fire buried deep within me. I can feel jealousy brewing in the pit of my stomach. This isn't real. I try to distract my mind, but the hallucinations win every time. I can't stop them. They start to get faster, flashing in and out of my mind like strobe lights. I see visions of my mom, of my family. Of the bombing of District Twelve. I watch as bombs rip them apart — peacekeepers making sure to put a bullet in the heads of anyone who survived the initial explosion. I feel sick to my stomach. My brain is moving at a mile a minute. This isn't real. I repeat it over and over in my mind. Start simple; start with what you know is true. My name is Peeta Malark. My home is District Twelve. I was in the Hunger Games. Katniss was saved. I was left behind.

My eye's open. Fluorescent lights blind me. Where am I. My arms and legs aren't strapped down? I look down; I'm wearing a clean white hospital gown. I look up. A group of people wearing gray jumpsuits are conversing around a clipboard. District thirteen is written on the back. I'm not in the capital anymore. They saved me.

"Should we bring her in?"

Their voices are muffled; I can almost make out what they're saying.

"Are you sure he's ready?"

My head begins to pound, and I lay back down on the bed. Coving my eye's with my hands, taking deep breaths. I'm processing a lot right now. I feel adrift of cool air as the door to the room opens. Looking up, suddenly im staring into those familiar green eye's. I feel my chest begin to swell with anger. My mind flashes back to everything that happened to me in the capital. All the pain I endured. All that emotion, all that damage, it's all because of Katniss. I looked into her eye's as she stabbed me, kicked me, mauled me, drugged me, burned me, killed me. I let my anger control me as I lurch forward, grabbing her by the neck and slamming her down onto the porcelain floor. The look of shock and horror spreading across her face only makes my desire to watch the life drain from her powerless body grow. Hot tears stream down my face. I don't want to kill her. But the resentment I feel needs an outlet. I don't know how to stop it. The need to strangle her feels compulsive. Just a side-effect of a damaged mind. The mind of the capitals weapon. The mind of a Mutt.

[hollandroos]

Stitches | Tom Holland

Summary: Based on the song ‘Stitches’ by Shawn Mendes. Where Tom is in an unhealthy relationship and comes to you one night when things get too hard,

Warnings: Toxic / verbally abusive relationships!! Please do not read this if it will trigger you. 

Words: 1.5k

Notes: This was partially based on a really amazing imagine called ‘Cherry Wine’ by one of my best friends @pumpkinparkers | I don’t know whos pic this is but if it’s yours I’ll happily give credit!

This has also barely been edited because it’s 10pm and I need dinner!! Enjoy :-)

You watch me bleed until I can't breathe

“Can I please– Can I please come in?”

You stared wide-eyed, grip limp on the door handle. Your friend– your best friend stood on the other side of the door, eyes red and raw filled with unshed tears that in no way matched the stains that ran imperfectly down his swollen cheeks. Tom looked broken, like glass shards scattered across a kitchen floor or an iPhone littered in messy, piercing cracks. His curls were no longer curls, but strands of hair that looked tugged at and teased and you hated everything about it. Not because he didn't look like Tom– your Tom, but because he looked to be in more pain than you could comprehend and you couldn’t work out if it were mentally or physically.

“Get in– god, Tom, you look a wreck.”

I'm shaking falling onto my knees

Maybe it wasn’t the best thing to say but Tom never expected you to lie to him. Admittedly he felt worse then he looked and he was almost certain that it’d get picked up on an MRI but then again, that wasn’t exactly how those things worked. But on the inside he expected a thick line to run down the middle of his heart, splitting the main organ in two– because Tom was always told that if he didn’t stop following his heart instead of his head that it’d break soon.

He expected his lungs to be giving up, finally sick of his wailing and consistent panic attacks and my god his brain, that was a whole other story. Tom was surprised he could still think straight after his mind had seemingly run a thousand miles an hour, coming up with every outcome and reminding him of every word she had spat. But maybe it was only a matter of time.

And now that I'm without your kisses

Tom can’t even look at you, filled with too much shame and guilt as his body can muster but for what? He didn’t know. “I can’t breathe. I can’t fucking breathe, She– She…”

You grab the blanket that was slung over your shoebox apartment couch, the woollen one knitted by your grandma that Tom had always taken a special liking too and throw it over his trembling shoulders. It was something familiar to him, and something that reminded him of happier times like the time you two sat cuddled up in it and binge-watched the hunger games movies, or the time he woke up at eight am after a wild night out. He had a pounding headache but woke up to a plate of warm pancakes, freshly made by you and the blanket wrapped firmly around his waist.

Then again, that was all before he got with her.

“Tom, look at me.” You instruct, guiding him to sit down on your couch. He takes the seat next to you, hugging the blanket to his chest and lets a fresh set of sobs rake over his body. It’s enough to make you want to break too but you don’t. No, you hold yourself together for him. “Take your time, in and out. You hear me?”

I'll be needing stitches

He does so and somehow in the process, finds his fingers laced together with yours. Tom didn’t know when or how, only that one second his legs were tapping up and down manically against the wooden planks and the next he was squeezing your hand as if it were his life support. Your touch was gentle, comforting. Hers was harsh and almost threatening every. Single. time.

“I can’t do it anymore, It hurts.” He struggled out, gripping the hair on top of his head with his free hand. Every wound was fresh, oozing with emotion. “I feel fucking stupid for sticking around, but I feel stupid for not being enough and I just– it hurts.”

Your best friend looked down, squeezing his eyes shut and cried every little emotion he was feeling out. Tears hit his jeans, torn and ragged. Tom was tired and he was hurt, every one of her words as harsh as they were cutting like a knife. He hated himself for beginning to believe her words, because at first he’d shrugged it off and told himself that it wasn’t true. Because he wasn’t worthless, or stupid, or a no good of a boyfriend, was he? There were a hundred other words he could’ve reminded himself of.

He looked like a kicked puppy.

I'm tripping over myself

But Tom felt stupid for crying about it because he was a boy and they’d told him to get over it, to suck it up, that he was overreacting. But you’d tell him now that he wasn’t and maybe that’s why the boy would trust you with his life. He’d lay it all out without a second thought and only now did he really begin to feel guilty for dragging you into his mess. Because it wouldn’t have happened if was just a better boyfriend, just a better son, just a better person.

You gripped the couch, black faux leather cracking beneath your grasp and you couldn’t care less because you were fuming, every emotion from anger to sadness racing through you at high speed and while you wanted to be there for Tom, you also wanted to show her not to mess with your best friend… and easily long-term crush.

For now, you’d stay and be with him, you’d be the girl that she was supposed to be but wasn’t.

“You are enough, you hear me? You will always be enough. This isn’t good for you, T, and you know that.” You stop and sigh, staring at your intertwined fingers. “We can talk about that in the morning because for now, I think you need some hot chocolate and just to cry everything out.”

Aching, begging you to come help

“You can tell me if I’m being stupid or weak. I–I don’t want to be a pain, you don’t have to put up with it just because you’re my best friend. She said that she doesn’t like us hanging out, anyway.” Tom merely whispered the last part, hating himself the second the words slipped his lips even if he’d already told you that before. But you were his absolute best friend, his number one and not even her words that had the same impact as snake venom could drag him away from you.

Tom reminding you that she didn’t like when you hung out made your face fall even more if that were possible and all you could think was how dare she.

“No way are you being stupid or weak, you’re hurt and that is enough to validate every single emotion you’re currently feeling. You’re my best friend, one of my favourite people in the goddamn world.” You stopped, eyes brimming with tears. “I love you– I love you and I can’t watch you stay with her when she does this to you. You’re a mess, Tom. It looks like you haven’t slept in days.” You sniffle, wiping away the tears that threatened to spill though Tom would admit that he was seconds away from doing that himself. “You’re one of the strongest people I know but you don’t have to be, got it? No matter what anyone says, your pain is so fucking valid.”

And now that I'm without your kisses

Tom listened to every word and it wasn’t hard considering it was only the two of you, no radio or tv or phones ringing or clocks ticking. It was just you both and he felt safe, embraced by the blanket that reminded him of simpler times. He never wanted things to change but then again they always did and he had no control over it. He had no control over any of it.

“Can we please go to sleep? Things were really hard tonight and I just need sleep.” He looks down at his lap, playing with one of the strands that hung off of the blanket and you only nod, giving his hand one last squeeze before standing up. The couch creaked as you did. Tom was utterly exhausted, drained of any energy he currently contained and his throat felt dry and scratchy, something he had noticed earlier.

Tonight and every night until he was ready to go through with things, you’d give him your bed. Your bed where you’d listened to him cry about her and her wicked words for the first time and your bed that you’d slept in together the night that he helped you move into your apartment.

Because you had given him everything you could in an effort to fix things for him, including your heart time and time again, hoping that one day—instead of using yours, he could pick up his again. But you would continue to allow him to do so for as long as it took. Because that's what best friends did, right?

I'll be needing stitches

-

Let’s talk about this imagine!!

Everything tags: @cosmetologynerd @holland-ish @smexylemony @thewiseandfree @zendayacolemen @dej-okay @hollandsletters @ive-got-some-lies-to-tell @liz-gayllen @marvelismylifffe @lovelyh0lland @tomhollandandmarvelsworld @woah-jess @southsidefandoms @spiderrrling @its-claire-louise @sophiatomlinson23 @mockingjaygirl1221 @joyfullyjenny @damnhisfaceisliketheskyatnight  @bride-of-loki-odinson @in-the-corner-coffee-please @futuremrsb-r-main @spideyyypeter @saturn-aka-six @c0prolalia @buckykinz @ashtonsbandannas @dennasaur @amyyleblanc1999 @fnosidam @randomfangirl1701@maybeandperhaps @acciorinn @marvel-language @micki-smiles @justmesadgirl @converseskyline @niall2017 @gavemylifetotomholland @tomuchmarvel @leslieandjensen @painted-soulss @practicallylivesonline @mischiefmanaged49 @its-the-unknownspidey @holyrose96 @for-my-mind @mlxbm @erindillon11 @captainbuckyy @shawnandhisroses @converseskyline @smitten0-0kitten @parkeroos @whileinparis @unicornio-vomita-mierdas @draqcnheartstrinq @rainyboo-posts @mikalaka @petxrpxrker @tony-starks-ego @thedaydreamingwriter @peter-quackson @kateelyse96 @lesbian-jesus-jr @wheresmyquill @elyshugh @hollanderheart @tomshufflepuff @marvelismylifffe @tomsh0lland @obsessed-fandoms @girl-in-the-chair @trashqueenbitch @dramatic-and-young @honey-honey-5644 @parkerluvs @chingonaconcha @captainbuckyy @jes-sica1 @tomsfireheart @rainbow-marvel @spideysimpossiblegirl @spideys-gurl @thomasstanley-holland @mlxbm @ixchel-9275 @parkerssweb @peter-parkersbb @tom-hollands-eyelash @starlightfound @vldlvj  @paradoxparker @lustfulcry  @mlxbm @musiclover1263 @justatheatredork @peterparkerscamera @fandomnerdsarecool @thequeensardine @cutesy-angst @httplayer @mischiefmanaged49 @loca-lola @softboyparkerr @desir-ae @dangerousluv1 @t-hotland @laucontrerasv @peter-parkersbb @whatdafricklefrackle @thatblondebelgiangirl @fairydustparker @they-call-me-le @jamiemac26 @t-hotland @moonkissedtom @spiderboytotherescue @starksmile

[loxxxlay]

a4 spoilers below

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okay seeing all these posts this morning, im getting upset so im gonna explain where im coming from:

im not mad that thor is fat now. i actually went through 3 phases once i read the spoilers about it:

one, briefly mourning the biceps that we all know i love.

two, GETTING SUPER EXCITED AT THE POSSIBILITIES. i definitely headcanon thor as becoming an alcoholic and losing touch with his physical health post-IW. i have like 3 fics lined up to read that deal with thor being overweight post-iw. i also have considered changing a post-iw fic im writing to include thor as being overweight too. i fucking love this idea of thor in canon showing signs of the huge grief and depression hes gone through. finally!!

and then three: i found more info, and while plotwise it might have been set up this way, thematically it seems to be insensitive. hes shamed by the people he loves--which Im well aware is a common experience, more on that later--but rather than for realism, it seems to be for COMEDY. so basically his weight gain is the butt of the joke. his suffering, his depression, his coping mechanisms are the butt of the joke.

okay more on my personal experience. i am not currently overweight, but i used to be throughout high school. and i got a really fucked up self image because of a few things ppl said. in college, i did ballet and basically starved myself for 2 years and became so thin that everyone started worrying about whether i was annorexic (i dont think i was but the fact is i did become underweight). that was a long time ago. ive finally regained my sense of hunger lol, and i am a decent weight right now, if a little chubbier than im comfortable with. many ppl call me "thin." however, even now i still binge eat during spikes of depression. im also very close to a family member who is currently overweight and used hard drugs and alcohol as coping mechanisms during one of their brutal depressive episodes.

in my weight now, i know i am privileged. but that doesnt mean i was always this way and that i dont understand the reality behind thor's experience. and its really frustrating that i feel i have to self-disclose all this information about myself simply to be able to say "i dont want to risk seeing fatshaming of a beloved character in end game"

like, this doesnt even add to the fact of gamora's treatment in IW. i saw DROVES of people who said that they thought the russos were very respectful of her character and the abuse she suffered. while i respect those ppl's opinions and their enjoyment of the movie, i INTENSELY disagree. and because of that, i dont trust the russos anymore.

and so just because now, loads of people are saying thor's mental illness and weight gain were treated respectfully* doesnt mean i will agree???? like ive read the comments characters made to thor. i know about the "go eat a salad" line. and whether i ultimately agree with ppl or not about whether it's respectful, im too emotionally vulnerable to risk being in a crowded room for 3 hours unable to escape while listening to ppl laugh at a line--a line that has been said again and again to *my* family member when *i* was the one to rebel against ppl who would laugh and *i* was the one to reassure her and make her feel better about herself because she hates that she is fat. if i have to relive these kinds of things during the movie, then there is absolutely no way i will enjoy it. im fucking sorry for not being willing to risk it -_-

so yeah, in short, to all the posts im seeing today trying to imply i (and ppl like me) are fatphobic for not wanting to go see and potentially not liking endgame: it's not that thor is fat. quite the opposite. it's that i dont trust fatshaming used as comic relief, esp in the hands of the russos.

just like, it's not that gamora was abused. as u can see by my focus subjects in writing, quiiite the fucking opposite. it's that i dont trust a representation that has her killed by her abuser, thus validating her abuser's "love" for her.

*i respect every overweight person or every alcoholic person (or anyone who used to be either) if they enjoyed this movie and/or thought thor's experience was respectfully depicted. i, in no way, want to rob you of your much-desired representation. it makes me super happy for you to know you felt fulfilled. ❤❤ all that this post is asking is that you respect me for my opinion.

p.s. i have not seen endgame yet. my opinion might change when i do. the premise of this post is that i dont want to see it right this moment because, based on the knowledge i have, the risk to my mental health is too great.

NOTE: PLEASE DO NOT TRY TO ARGUE WITH ME OR CONVINCE ME IM WRONG. ive read like 5 million different opinions on thor being fat before i made up my mind, and i am WELL-VERSED on anything u could possibly say. (at least as much as i can be without seeing the movie.) i dont want hear it anymore. i dont want to defend my feelings anymore. i already had to like literally 50 times yesterday and im ooooverrrrr itttt. 😭😭😭😭 let me be upset and unwilling to go see endgame at this time. i promise you, despite my opinion, the world will keep spinning. your own enjoyment will stay strong. ❤❤❤❤

[petruchio]

i LOVE ur hunger games opinions - it's my favorite series I always go back to!! I was wondering if you had any other book recommendations

omg!!! angel!!

in terms of young adult recs, i don’t read a huge amount of new ya so these are probably pretty basic, but the ones i would recommend are:

gregor the overlander!!! suzanne collins’ other series, its a little more ~classic ya~ than ya dystopia of the hunger games but still just. so well written bc its the queen suzanne

the entire anne of green gables series <3 literally gilbert and peeta are the two ya love interests that i have been obsessed with my entire life and the books are actually SO good!! there’s a lot i could say about them too like the messages and themes are really quite intelligent and they get written off as just “children’s lit” but they’re truly SO good, even the later ones in the series!!

i’ll recommend six of crows and, i suppose, the original grisha trilogy if you feel like tearing your hair out. ive written a bit about my mixed feelings for that series on my blog but like. the world building is GREAT but the original trilogy just has a few moments that are so deeply frustrating. but its good

howl’s moving castle the book!!!! so iconic, so different from the movie but just also SO good... dianna wynne jones my beloved

this summer id like to reread the golden compass if i have time! i havent read the books since i was a literal child and i remember nothing about them except that they were good but i want to reread it so i can watch the show hehe

i also read last summer a book called why we broke up by daniel handler and i thought it was beautiful and really poignant. it also has amazing illustrations and the story i thought was really well done

i also loved the ingo series as a kid!!!! yes its like. mermaids but also its really well written lol

a few books that aren’t ya:

homegoing by yaa gyasi

there, there by tommy orange

it is my personal (and insanely pretentious) belief that everyone should read les miserables but. thats just because im insane. but i do genuinely love that book 

also the entire jane austen catalogue with special attention to emma <3

normal people because like. yeah (that might be ya actually not sure how to categorize it but. amazing book)

recently i read the plague of doves by louise erdrich and really loved it!! im hoping to read more of her work but she’s an amazing author

i’m also a big fan of modern retellings of stories, last year i read a retelling of pride and prejudice called eligible by curtis sittenfeld that i very much enjoyed

outside of that i also love to read really shitty romance fiction and hyper specific historical non-fiction because i read so many impossible and insanely difficult books for my degree and i just can’t recommend any of those in good faith haha... once i graduate ill honestly probably have better book recs because right now i read so many books i DONT enjoy and write 15 pages essays on why i think they suck... but those are just a few of my favorites!!!!! 

[typicalmidnight]

iron man 2 running commentary

okay so watching iron man 2 for the first time and i have a feeling im gonna have lots of commentary to share so it will all be under the cut! i’m gonna keep updating it as i watch!

*starts watching iron man 2 without watching iron man first cause it’s not on netflix and is only 2 minutes in but completely confused*

*questions my intelligence because i was able to understand the other marvel movies without watching other ones first*

*wonders if somehow i haven’t seen enough tony stark on tumblr to understand but i’ve somehow seen enough of other things to understand other movies*

*cue suprised and upset anon* sorry anon!!

okay anon!! help me pls! is the guy in the very beginning of iron man 2 someone from the first movie, and if he is who is he?? or is he new in this movie? edit: nevermind i looked it up

omg the first scene we see iron man is so cooool i love it!

holy sh*t he just landed on a stage omggg *freaks out so much because WOW*

im not even 7 minutes in yet but WOW IM SHOOK

i litterally just watched that first scene of tony/iron man in awe the whole time

“the possibility of world peace” BAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAA there’s a whole lot in store for the world, and i can guarantee it wont be peaceful lol

the stark expo is year long?!?!!?!!??? wow....

oooh oooh oooh that’s happy!

tony with kids awww

OMG THATS PETER PARKER RIGHT

STAN LEEEE OMG AWWWW

wait what did tony do??

AHHHHH pepper!!

does tony like pepper yet?? are they dating??

god tony. his sense of humor omg.

pepper isnt impressed lol

tony is so savage we stan a queen lol

you’re right, it isn’t canada cause we’re AWESOME and dont have ppl trying to get rid of iron man

rhodey!! i know who that is!

litterally everything tony says is amazing

oooooh whats tony up to?...

world peace? dream on tony

did he just say f**k you to tony stark? UM NO YOU DID NOT

oof the scenes with this bad dude are boring

wait i take that back HE JUST CUT A TV IN HALF!!

“wake up, daddy’s home” god i love tony

i think im getting too excited about everything lolll

tony insulting that robot arm thing gives me life

whats that thing in tony’s chest?? im guessing it has something to do with him being iron man and was part of the first movie

im confused about the relationship between pepper and tony

oooh shes ceo congrats to her!!

is this actually good tho?? the look on her face isnt great

oh okay its good she was just suprised

are those like fake documents or something?

OMG ITS NATASHA!!! AHHHHHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE’S LIKE MY FAVE MCU WOMAN OTHER THAN MJ

i got way too excited there and hit my wrist on my wall and now it hurts

wait he doesn’t know nat yet??? HOW?!

also ummm natalie rushman?? that name kinda suits her?? ish idk

NATASHA IS A QUEEEEEEN!!!! I STANNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also got so excited about nat that my eyes started to water

“i want one” okay tony nat could knock you out in a second and she for sure doesn’t need a man! also PEPPER!!!!!! LIKE WHAT ABOUT HER!

its the grand prix! it looks just like it does in cars 2!! lollll i was super shooketh about that when i made the connection

OMG ITS NAT AGAIN YAY!

WAIT is tony gonna drive that race car??? is he gonna race??? OMG i hope he does

also my wrist still hurts

wait pepper is suprised?? tony you didnt tell pepper? TONY YOU DIDNT TELL PEPPER??? TONY COME ONNNNNN

OMG TONY WHY PEPPER IS CONCERNED NOW

also is nat working for tony or something

oof its 12 am i should sleep i have school tmrw

haha bish that reporter lady left cause ur boring and nobody cares about you

AHHHH TONY’S GONNA RACEEEE

omg tony is racing tony is racing TONY IS RACING TONY IS RACING!!!! TONY PLS DONT DIE OR SOMETHING

hello my name is leea and i’m a huge drama queen that loves and cares so much about tony stark

OMG ITS THE VILLAIN GUY ACKKK TONY IS GONNA DIE

im still super dramatic lol

and also 100% convinced tony is gonna die even tho i know that wont happen

IM GETTING SO MUCH ANXIETY FROM JUST WATCHING THIS AHHHH

THE VILLAN GUY IS GOING SOMEWHERE ONTO THE TRACK OR SOMETHING ACKKKK

i hit my elbow and my head (not too hard dont worry) and the elbow is the same arm that i hurt my wrist so now my arm hurts from my elbow to my hand

WHAT IS THAT GUY DOING HE JUST WALKED ONTO THE RACE CAR TRACK

i litterally pressed play and then pressed pause two seconds later ooooof

peppers face omg she is shooketh lol

WTF IS HE DOING??!!!!!! also wth is he wearing on his chest?

OOOOOOOOOMG he has his slicy electricity weapon thingies TONY IS GONNA DIE AHHHH

HE JUST HIT A CAR OMG I HOPE THE PERSON IS OKAY

^big example of me being a drama queen and innocent and sweet at the same time

HAPPY HAS WHAT IM ASSUMING TO BE IRON MAN SOMETHING

TONY IS ABOUT TO DIE!!!

i paused it right before he hits the car omg the suspense!!!!!

ANXIETY LEVELS RIGHT NOW

OMG TONY NOOOOOOOO

IM BREATHING SO DEEP AND FAST RIGHT NOW IM PANICKING FOR TONY (it’s called hyperventalating. future me remembered the word lol)

dude WHYYY would you take off your helmet??!!!!

there is a dude coming to kill you and i think a helmet would help protect you idiot!!

OMG THERES A CAR COMING AT THE VILLAIN GUY

WHAT IF IT HITS HIM AND THEN HITS TONY

THEY JUST EXPLODED OMG

i just choked because i was like WHAT JUST HAPPENED

there are cars exploding behind him and this dude just doesnt care!!

why have i started saying dude?

owww my wrist hurts

typing hurts

owwww

its actually really not that bad im dramatic

is pepper gonna save tony????

does the case have the rescue armor ive read about?????

HE JUST TRIED TO KILL TONY

*facepalms* tony WHY did you just hit him on the head with whatever that was??? what did you think it would accomplish??????? this dude just sliced your car in half and tried to kill you, do you think you can take him out by hitting him on the head??? just get tf out of there!!!

OMG HES GONNA KILL TONY

i just hit my head again (not hard it fine)

OMG DID HE JUST HIT TONY

I THINK HE JUST HIT TONY

IM NOT OKAY

AND I DONT THINK HE IS EITHER

AHHHHHHHHHHH

okay i’m going to bed cause its almost 1 am and i have school. anyway, this is the 100th comment which is kinda good to leave off at! i’ll finish watching tmrw and keep posting!

okay i’m back! about to start watching the movie!

ahhhhhh poor tony!!! i’m only a few seconds in but already panicking for him!!

omg hes getting ready to kill tony!! and tony is just lying on the ground!!!

pepper and happy come save him! ! ! ! ! !!!!!!!

or nat!!!!

ahhhhhhhhh tonys gonna die!!!!!!!!!!!!!

with every second i freak out moreeeee

oh thank GOD tony moved!!!

that car just exploded omg tony almost diedddd!!!

AHHHHH TONY IS ON FIRE

how tf is he so calm!!!!????!?!?!?!?!?

i mean hes not that calm but way calmer than any normal human should be in this situation

is he just like used to people trying to kill him??

OMG thats soo saaaaaaaddddd

OKAY HERE COMES PEPPER AND HAPPY

please run over him!!!

OMG THEY ALMOST HIT TONY

but they hit the bad guy yay!!!

awww tony is bleeding!

well i mean thats kinda expected lol

oof tony is mad

OMG PEPPER IS SO PISSED

shes acting like a mom lol

OMG THE GUYS WEAPONS ARE POWERING ON

THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE

TONY JUST GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE DOOR

TONY GET IN THE CAR AND HAPPY GET TF OUT OF THERE!!!!

tony just GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE AIR BAG

HE JUST CUT THE WINDOW

THIS SCENE IS SO INTENSE OMG

okay pepper i love you but JUST GIVE TONY THE CASE

tony your armor is taking WAY TOO LONG to get on!!!

AHHHHH LOOK AT THE ARMOR!!!!!

ITS SO OLD

like not old

but compared to his current suit

the “it’s nanotech. you like it?” one

its nothing

AHHH HE HIT TONYS ARM

AHHHH TONYS GONNA DIE

AHHHH PEPPER IS SCREAMING

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#drama queen much? #yes thats me

AHHH COME ON TONY

love how i’ve only gotten 3 more minutes into the movie and i’m already at 47 comments

OMG HE JUST WHIPPED TONY TO THE GROUND

omg poor tony!!!!

can everyone just leave my dad alone PLEASE

YAY TONY!! NOW THE BAD GUY IS ON THE GROUND!!!

oh thank god tony is okay hes not dead he won for now

eww he just spat out a bunch of blood

“you loose” how??? like what???

ooooooooooh wait no is tony gonna get in trouble.......

i forgot to say this yesterday but this whole scene with the guy on the track and stuff and the exploding cars in kinda similar to cars 2

i guess you cant have a racing scene in a movie without a car exploding tho

what is up with that guy with glasses?? like hes weird i dont trust him

why arent there subtitles translating whatever language they are speaking in (french? idk)

ya its french

ofc tony talks about the technology lol

and critcizes the bad guy’s

tony this guy tried to kill you WHY are you sitting down next to him??!!?

that guy is weird and kinda creepy

okay just f off senator dude nobody likes you, your opinion isnt valid, and i wanna punch you

“these suits exist now”????? wtf b*tch no they dont!

wait what ever happened to nat??

pepper is really responsible shes great i love her

what does that note say???

omg is that a bomb or something??!

why do guards always help prisoners escape like seriously

is that guy gonna take his place or something??

also he kinda looks like haymitch from hunger games

omg wait WTF WAS THAT

ALSO GUARD WHAT THE HELL

i was right! it was a bomb!

why did they throw him in a truck??

omg why are they in an airport?!

are they gonna help him escape??!!

why is there a table and people....

is that glasses guy sitting at the table?

i was right it is glasses guy!

i didn’t trust him from the start

why is he helping him tho...

friend? fan? what is going on?!!!???

YAYYYYY theres nat!!!

“erratic behaviour”??? what are you talking about???? he just saved himself from being killed how is that erratic?????!!

awwww poor tony

i beleive in you tony, and i love you, but no honey, you don’t know exactly what you’re doing you need help!

“software sh*t” aaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaahhaaaaa

make iron man look like an antique? ya no way is that gonna happen

is nat his assistant or something im a bit confused

aww tony is like so depressed i feel so bad for him!!

stannnnn nat

back on watch? what does that mean...

omg tony is so drunkkkkkk nooooo

ohhhhh tonyyyyy noooo come onnnn

you’re so drunk dude stopppp

god tony you’re so drunk pleaseee

wait why is rhodey fighting him anyway?

wow this is my 101 comment today and i’ve only watched 20 mins today

omggggg people are recordingggg this isn’t gonna end well

*sighs* oh god tony dont yell at them whyyyyy

omg tonys in the fire place!!!

omg that just happened. they just fired at each other.

also just saying tony, he does have what it takes to be war machine cause he continues to be...

ohhhh is tony okay??

im confused tho why did they start fighting in the first place?

okay i just looked it up, it was because he was being irresponsible and drunk, and putting people at the party in danger, and he wouldnt stop

ngl its getting kinda tiring to keep updating this but i’m gonna keep going cause i want this record for myself, and i’m not gonna quit something

ok i’m gonna continue the movie tmrw cause its prob gonna be a snow day (lol i left off at 111)

[lametooru]

tag games! 

im always so slow to do these so heres a bunch of them bc they are super fun to do and i love learning things about my mutuals , thanks to everyone who’s tagged me ❤

20 Qs Tag

tagged by @hwangsrenjun 

rules: answer 20 questions, then tag 20 bloggers you want to get to know better

name: kingkanoke

nicknames: tan

height: 5′5

orientation: het

nationality: british/thai

favorite season: autumn !!!! 

favorite flower: forget-me-nots they’re so pretty 

favorite scent: fresh laundry soOOSOO good

favorite color/s: like any shade of blue 

favorite animal: cheetahs and dolphins 

coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: ice coffee + tea

average sleep hours: i used to be able to run on 5/6 hrs but apparently now i need like 7/8

dog or cat person: love both but if i had to choose ... doggies

favorite fictional character(s): literally so fucking many but rn im brainwashed by marvel so : thor, peter, steve my BEST boys 

number of blankets you sleep with: 1

dream trip: korea, jpn, cali, nyc, greece, italy, bali, new zealand, australia lmao like everywhere

blog created: 2012 im a veteran on here kiddos ive seen the rise and falls of whole civilisations 

number of followers: more than i thought i would get tbf

random fact: i would chose death over eating celery like honestly even the smell alone idk it really urks me 

get to know me ok

Rules: Answer 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you’d like to know better

Tagged by:@kkimingyu

nicknames: tan

gender: female

zodiac: pisces !!! wheres all my emo fish people at c;

height: 5′4/5 like im in between there 

age: 19 ohymgod im so old im not even gunna be a teen anymore next yr thats goss :(

time: 10:04pm

favorite bands/artists: hmmm im gunna answer outside kpop ... i listen to panic! at the disco, fall out boy, rihanna, britney spears lmao im so basic i know aksjhfasl i also have a lot of misc songs that i really like so my music taste is just all over the place

song stuck in my head: its legit just the the theme from parks and recs bc im watching it rn 

last movie I saw: it was literally black butler book of murder lmafooooooooo ffs can my weeb ass tone it down pls

last thing I googled: ‘why am i sneezing so much’ 

other blogs: @fyvoltronld (100% vld stuff) and my newly made art blog @tnkisu

do I get asks: i used to get quite a lot of requests when i was an anime blog lool

why I chose my username: bc mingyu is uwu :3

following: 210

the average amount of sleep: 7 ish

lucky no: 3 bc i was born on 3rd march 

what am I wearing: grey joggers and over sized tee lol see me at the next fashion week pls

dream job: illustrator / graphic designer in the entertainment industry somwhere

dream trip: okaay lol here we go: italy esp positano!!, california, nyc, hawaii, new zealand, japan, korea, hong kong, canada dream big i guess

favorite food: literally craving roast duck n rice so much rn also ice cream if that counts! and noodles mmMMMMmmmm

instruments: i used to play the trumpet but i quit when i was like 13

sports: i played volleyball for almost 2 yrs but stopped bc uni and i used to cycle loads too (and yes its bc of anime lmao whats new)

hair color: dark brown, blackish like ur normal asian hair

eye color: matches my hair im so boring oof

most iconic song: um if u seek amy by miss britney spears? she didnt have to snap that hard

languages: english and like 40% of thai lol im losing it all 

random fact: i LOVE dressing gowns if im not outside im probably wearing one, even in the summer theyre just so comfy i own 3

describe urself as aesthetic things ! : the buzz of a busy restaurant, 3am talks with your friends, going into the city at night and being surrounded by lights, the warmth of the sun hitting your skin, your favourite people smiling at you, reading a book on a cloudy day, that one annoying itch you can’t quite seem to scratch 

˗ˏˋ 11 question tag ˊˎ˗

thank you for tagging me @jisoostar & @gyuofficial

rules: tag some people you would like to get to know better.

how much sleep did you get last night? don’t lie to me.

9 i think.. its the summer holidays so i sleep for a looooooong time

do you use any lip balm or lip tint? what are you using?

lip balm all the way aint no time for ashy lips lol i use the cherry carmex lip balm  

tell me about your guilty pleasure!

hmm maybe those slice of life animes that r just over the top, a bit dumb and funny with no serious plot lines or anything 

what’s your favorite subject at school and why?

art bc i was shit at everything else ahaha....

pick 5 idols to be your classmates!

oKAy : kevin (the boyz), key (shinee), hoshi (svt) , mingyu (svt), hyungwon (monsta x) 

experience the hunger games or the purge?

the purge bc i live in the most eventual village in england  

tell me your favorite food without saying what it is. describe it.

mmmmmm....a meat from an animal with wings paired with white grains from a plant and a hot liquid on the side (this makes it sound gross aslfjaslkf)

what language do you have an interest in learning?

spanish, mandarin, korean, italian too mayb

you found a magic lamp and the genie will grant you three wishes. what do you have in mind? please, don’t ask for more wishes.

the ability to draw whatever i wanted to the way i envisioned it in my head (correct proportions, depth of view, shadows vs highlights etc) 

to be able to be fluent in all languages i wanted including reading & writing

have flawless skin for the rest of my life 

pick three of your favorite cuisines!

not being biased but thai is my number 1 lolololol

japanese 

chinese esp dim sum 

hey, the last question is a PSA. you’re precious and i love you. reply with: “i’m precious and i love me too”.

getting on my last uwus smh :(  thank u, im precious and i love me too ~

tagging: @kkimingyu @cafewoozi  @jeongahn @wonhuis  @himeaegyo @jeong-hanie​ @jisoostar​ @bbymarklee @ilxu (feel free to do them all, one or non ^^) 

[dea-certe]

For ne its because when someone says "favorite" they mean the number one spot. And like......no such thing. I dont have a favorite song, I have a hundred favorite songs that rotate out the top spot (sometimes they rotate every hour, sometimes they rotate every day). I mean, I have something like 4000 songs on my music playlist. Ive got musical soundtracks and pop and punk rock and classic rock and hard rock and alternative rock and classic pop songs. Ive got everything from the Xena soundtrack from Bitter Suite to Citizen Soldier to Taylor Swift and back to Hayley Kiyoko. I like them all. You want me to pick 1 or 2? Not possible.

Same thing with movies or books. I own over 400 physical books and over 500 e-books. Those are books that I love so much, I actually put the effort into finding and buying. I've got everything from Star Wars novels to Buffy novels to the In Death series and Dresden files series and hunger games trilogy and Twilight series and t*witches series to Guide to the Xenaverse and Dr Horrible companion guide and Persephone Unveiled and Sigil Witcher and Darkside zodiac and thats not to mention all my political science books and law school textbooks. Pick 1 or 2? It'd be easier to pick a favorite limb.

And food? Oh, thats almost harder because my cravings fluctuate with where I am on my cycle and what I've eaten recently and what mood I'm in. Plus, how can you compare the freshness and fishnets and fatty layers of salmon sashimi with the crunch and tang and sweetness of salad with fruits and stra eery vinaigrette or with the combination of fresh lettuce and tomato mixing with the greasyness of fresh hamburger meat in a burger or with the combo of simple cheese, tomato sauce, and taste of parmesan on the crust of pizza? I can't do it.

You know I can pick as a favorite? I can pick a favorite color. Pink. Just don't ask me to pick a favorite shade of pink, okay? I like them all. Kyoko.

I hate the concept of favorite because it always seems like "pick this one and it has to stay this one fairly consistently" and I just.....can't do that, you know? I just can't.

[yasugapped]

Tagged by @superjojolimon , considering how vague the “rules” are i have Rebelliously Interpreted the questions as changeable so i just like swerved whatever seemed 2 plain for my tastes. also a lot of these just seem repeated/too similar?

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you wanna get to know better

gender: female

star sign: sag rising, libra sun, taurus moon ;^)

height: 5′3″ but can and will kill you 

mood: a dimly lit image of a possum eating oreos. munchin crunchin havin a good night

favorite bands: death grips ..... i’d say more but i’ll let u all think on that one for awhile .... 

song stuck in my head: like. the ending credits to spongebob

favorite animal: trick question its All of Them.

last movie I watched: i watch NOTHING ......... i have. never watched shit or fuck in my entire life?? ?. .. i actually cant remember i Really dont watch movies, the only ones i really like are perks of being a wallflower, internal sunshine of the spotless mind, and donnie darko

last text u sent: ok i screenshot this picture of funny valentine and his stand like “couple goals” ... .. . .. .

when did I create my blog: i dont know or care but when i made it i hadnt even read part 8 ??? i literally was committing to yasugap before i even really knew what it was like ............ im such an authentic fan,.. also, the only other part i’ve read is 4, which i read solely because i saw a picture of josuke and loved him with my Life .. i literally only read it for josuke content and didnt care much (and still dont) for the real story of it. i enjoy part 8, story wise, way more but also i love josuke2.0 a lot and i just.. . love josuke And josuke bitch whathe thefculk1!!!

fear fear fear fear fear: i am extremely hesitant to invest in any potentially horrific or goretastic display because i have like. the worst paranoia. in january youtube kept playing when my sister and i fell asleep and when i woke up it was on a video of markiplier playing an scp game and it Shook me so much. i have literally never been the same. theres an scp thats just shadows on the wall and now i cant stop hyperfixating on the shadow on my bedroom door at night... it iis !! the worst!!!! bitch!!!! :^(

another strange fear is that, i sometimes get this extreme paranoia im not alone in the bathroom and i will typically pull back the shower curtain to make sure nothing’s hiding. i’ve also legitimately checked under my bed and in my closet, but the bathroom fear is a lot stronger than those for some reason.

last thing I googled: oh my god its “funny valentine” ... w-what a shock!! wh..o wouldve guessed. ... .. have i mentioned i havent read part 7,

sipp: i actually cannot live ... without coke ... uhm ..., i prefer coke entirely flat but also cold. i pour them out into a cup and set them in the fridge to fizz out. literally. also i cant stand ice in drinks. 

hmmm one of those uh GET THE BOOK NEAREST 2 U AND READ THE 69TH WORD OF THE 420TH PAGE: ok so this book is house of leaves. it is my favorite book and has been for a few years but i’ve never finished reading it ;^) 

i think the technical 69th word was ‘in,’ but here’s the whole lil paragraph there: “Near the centre, in crisp focus, squats Delial, bone dangling in her tawny almost inhuman fingers, her lips a crawl of insects, her eyes swollen with sand. Illness and hunger are on her but Death is still a few paces behind, perched on a rocky mound, talons fully extended, black eyes focused on Famine’s daughter.” this book has a writing style i extremely admire. it is filled with senseless, mindnumbing extents of detail and confusion, it feels almost like a modernized version of poe’s style???? also neat about this book is the looks - if you’re interested, try looking up just pages from house of leaves.

last thing u devoured viciously: we went 2 this mexican restaurant i’ve been to a bunch, i always get the same thing, but this time i got this taco salad. it was disappointing. like it literally wasnt good and i was upset, 

NAME???? i just realized this question isnt here like how are u going to get to know me without THIS ...: like,, i dabble a ton in original content & characters, and my ... sonas are always named maizzey starr, and “maizzey starr” is like my BRAND so i go by maizzey a lot but as far as my real literal name ITS KAMRYN !!!!!!! like im so unique and good ..... ... ... starts crying

password style: i have only had like four different passwords in my Life. this makes it supremely easy to figure one out on a really old account or website.... i dont understand people who ...... make up different passwords for everything,, i also never initially use capital letters unless prompted. i do use numbers in like one of them.

favorite colors: i usually like colder colors more than warm, but in general i prefer bright and colorful things. rainbow rainbow rainbow rainb

average sleeping hours: oh my god ........... this is wild. i don’t have any kind of sleeping schedule whatsoever. my schedule will do fucking FLIPS 3 times a week - i recently got melatonin gummies to try and get myself on a schedule but i legitimately think i have like a sleeping issue :^(

what am I wearing: d-dont ask questions u arent prepared 2 hear the answers to.............

dream u can remember: my last dream sequence went like this. i lurking forums for club penguin. people were discussing a penguin who was kin with napoleon. like kin as in the THIS IS ME not kin as in family. and other people - .. penguins....- were also starting to be napoleon kin and it was a trend and the original napoleon penguin was angry? this vision entirely dissolved and i was in my room at night, in my bed, and i looked over to my closet as an unknown, fleshy figure leaped for me. this is literally the most terrifying dream i’ve had in my entire life. oh my god

last meme u made: FUCK .... also this

how do u have pizza: I PREFER PEPPERONI ... im ok with plain cheese especially like when its cold??? i odnt like hot cheese pizza idk why ,, .. im not very adventurous with my pizza.... i really want a dessert pizza 

weirdest thing u’ve Actually put in ur mouth: nail polish...... i saw one of those my strange addiction episode with a girl who ate nail polish. i think i tried like three different colors - they burn slightly, the taste isn’t totally disgusting but its also not like.... appealing?? OMFEJFSDJJDGDHJFDJFDSGFD 

also one time i thought. we had a those huge bricks of baker’s chocolate BUT IT WAS WAX CUBES so ive tried cinnamon wax cubes too oops!!!!!!! i mean they tasted like cinnamon so..., .h-heh , , ,..kvkfkj

any pets: YES BITCH .  .,, . i have.. THREE (3) entire whole living dogs. and also ! three guinea pigs. i love dogs more than i love anything. .. ,, . .. . 

also im 2tired 2 tag so i mean u kno goodnight