#ive already have them all in drafts so !!
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
puppppppppy · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
this place is so fruity
2K notes · View notes
just-sp-in-inginthevoid · 8 months ago
Text
Imagine reading a new manga and joking about it being homoerotic and then it gets explicitly stated that one of the protags is gay
If I don't see any weird romance blossom between those two istg-
21 notes · View notes
itstheheebiejeebies · 10 months ago
Text
Me: I need to get stuff made for the upcoming weeks of the rewatch
Also Me: makes shit completely unrelated to the rewatch over and over again
22 notes · View notes
clockvenn · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Oc stuff !!! Idk if I've ever shown these guys here before or nah but yuh they've been around as long as Rubix or Vx has
I think.. ?
7 notes · View notes
starsiide · 6 months ago
Text
if an artist says their turnaround time is usually a week and that they should be done with your specific commission by the end of the week, then goes nearly three weeks without saying something, is it OK to ask them for an update on your commission? I'm a bit torn on whether I should wait a whole month
#as someone who takes comms myself if i were me i would have sent an update after being unable to finish it within my turnaround time#just to be like hey heres what ive got so far sorry that this isnt the turnaround time i said it would be in my comms listing#but also im NOT them so 🤷 idk. literally anything could have happened and maybe they cant even use their phone right now#i dont wanna send them an email (even the very politely worded one ive been drafting) bc i dont want to be rude like at all#but also this person didnt get back to me for over a month when i first reached out to commission them so#im starting to see that for the red flag it was#and not like. a sign that they just have so many commissions to do. because it doesnt take long to send an email that says#'sorry im a bit too busy with other comms right now to take yours/work on yours'#i wouldnt have been mad. i would have either waited to comm them or taken my business elsewhere#i also wanna be clear i dont mind long turnarund times ive waited literal months for a comm with no complaints#its just the fact that they promised to finished it (completely unprompted) and then havent... said ANYTHING for WEEKS that seems sus to me#its crossed my mind i may have been scammed since they havent shown me anything more than a sketch#edit: part of the im really regretting comming them is because ive already waited a month to even like finish the TAKING my comm process#since they randomly didnt email me back for weeks right as we were finalizing the details#like i waited a LONG time to even be like 'are you still taking my comm?' bc in my head i was like#'they must have other comms that they havent mentioned (totally valid btw) if i wait the queue will be clear'#and then... yea idk i just dont think that was the case if their turnaround time is actually a week#which is a really short turnaround time anyway imo theyre making it too hard on themself#(funnily enough i have the same turnaround time which is why i know it can be challenging to do it in a week but its also completely doable)#anyway back to the fact i probably got scammed. their 'sketch' though i didnt wamna say it looked VERY much like#they just traced my concept sketch#which 😰
3 notes · View notes
vraska-theunseen · 6 months ago
Text
aughhhh. aughhhhhjhhhh
#everhoneignore this post classic rant post i don't have real problems everyone can move along#truly have had such a bad couple of days here and i am not even close to finishing the assignments i need to finish in welding being in#clsss makes me want to quit and die i don't know why i'm so slow i don't know why everyone else can intuit this stuff and improve and#understand how to do it and im always always falling behind if i could try harder wouldn't i be able to do that ive got no drive to push#myself at all i guess i like the english and i can do the physics i thought i at least liked drafting and metals fabrication but i feel so#stupid everything i do makes me feel so stupid and my teacher talks to me like i'm always doing everything wrong when i do some classroom#ettiquette breaches that everyone else does too and i can't get myself to go to sleep on time can't get myself to go in early i have hours#and hours and hours and i blink and it's gone and i've done nothing i should've welded today and gone in early to draft but i didn't because#im stupid and im slow and i can't do anything right i have always been able to square away a little bit of pride on being precise on doing#things well because people are always telling me that i am but i am below average here i just can't do things right and i feel like everyone#hates me and thinks i'm obnoxious and i don't know how to interface with my class or my teacher or how to improve or how to be less anxious#and i feel even stupider for that because i am so stuck up not being able to deal with even a little bit of failure or issue or hardship#and everyone around me is sick all my classmates and people in my dorm are sick im sure it's covid they haven't said it's covid but none of#them would test and i've been wearing a mask again but im certainly been exposed to it already and no one else is wearing a mask anyway so#what difference does it even make and i can hear them coughing in my dorm and in the classroom and when i go to get food and i miss seeing#my friends from philly and everuthing will be terrible forever and ever#alex talks
2 notes · View notes
Note
32. say please for the WIP Ask Game
Send me an ask from my WIP List and I'll post a little snippet or tell you something about it!
This one is slightly nsfw-ish
A present from Christian may be new but the Duke is often bringing Satine all sorts of treats: new hats and gloves, shiny earrings and sparkly bracelets, stick candy and pretty baubles and silly little trinkets. But of course, such things are never freely given. No; they always, always come at a price. Presents have to be earned. Satine drops to her knees, not wanting to wait any longer. She reaches for the zipper on Christian’s pants, fumbling it in her eagerness, delighted for the opportunity to show him that she deserves to be gifted presents, to be treated with affection. That it isn’t wasted on someone like her, that she will make it worth his while.
5 notes · View notes
good-beans · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
4 notes · View notes
holdmymetaphor · 20 days ago
Text
also, writing a long fic is hard.... its truly like running a marathon. im at a total of 70k out of a projected 100k and im like trying to juggle everything without it being like exposition city with no flavor....
4 notes · View notes
dutchs-paisley-vest · 1 month ago
Text
this fic is so sinister man
1 note · View note
nyctarian · 1 month ago
Text
oh my god the image posted so much bigger than i expected lol woe read more be upon ye
Tumblr media
different sort of draft check in but i am very close to being done with the 2019 section of my drafts
3 notes · View notes
waywardsalt · 7 months ago
Text
.
#not one of them scary vent tag posts just. thibkin#ive been playing fe awakening mostly to collect different s-supports bc i like to get the different supports#and also just see. child character hair variants. i have to admit i think i like fates more but awakening has the vastly more#interesting child characters and like. everything with them it does have that.#i want to continue smt iv bc im on my third time through aiming for a nothing ending but like#i rrally like that game but lord its kinda a slog tbh. i might play some mlre later to ease back into it#i reeeeally want to get that neutral ending and figure out how to thread the needle fo reach it#years-old intricately detailed smt iv gamefaqs threads i LOVE you i would still be lost in naraku without you#motivation is… more isabeau screen time. or else#i have no interest in smt iv apocalypse i do not care about that i just want to see all of smt iv#anyways. new ship fic chapter draft poll and if it ends up a tie im just going to force something#or i could get my friend to jump in and vote if theres an even number of votes a few mins before it closes#a newer fear i have abt that fic now is that theres going to be more time spent before the romance#so only a little bit is the actual romance. and im going to remedy that. already have been working on it by shuffling around some events#look the plan is 31 chapters so far honestly we can do confession at roughly 40#and then just. keep going#i dont know how to feel abt it being potentially genuinely long. as. fuck.#i think it’d be funny if it ends up 70-80 w/e chapters n when i post the firsr chapter on ao3 with the bellum/linebeck tag n everything#and i do the chapter count so its like. say the plan is 75 chapters so i do the thing where it shows up as 1/75 chapters#i think it’ be funny to drop the first fic for this weird ass ship and just be open that its going to be like. a very long novel#i might not tho in case i decide to change things on the fly. anyways. whatever. i need to.#research gila monsters and also look into dnd paladins
0 notes
tkbrokkoli · 8 months ago
Text
x-x
0 notes
reidsmanuscript · 1 month ago
Text
Profiler, profiled.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Summary: When the past creeps up, more vivid and dangerous than ever, at the same time that the attraction becomes undeniable—and so do the mistakes. Pairing: Spencer Reid x lawyer!reader Genre: mutual pinning but painful, angst. wc: 7.3k! TW: Profiler, profiled canons! so Child abuse (implied and discussed), Sexual abuse, Framing/wrongful accusation, Police misconduct, Violence, mentions of traumatic readers' past!, female rage, violent thoughts. not proofread yet A/N: SO EXCITED FOR THIS ONE, this is my take on soulmates, thank u for all the feedback/support btw, really mindblowing <3 part I - part II - part III - part IV - masterlist
            .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.     
Something as routine and comforting as traveling to your hometown for your mom’s birthday can go wrong in an instant—sometimes, all it takes is a single moment of doubt. Unfortunately for Derek Morgan, it was the absence of doubt that could become his sentence.
Hotch was notified, as per FBI protocol, that one of his agents had been arrested as a homicide suspect. Maybe it was the fact that he knew Morgan wasn’t capable of something like that—he had been a prosecutor before joining the Academy, after all. As his boss, he refused to believe it. But as his friend, he knew that the smartest move, the one most people failed to make, was calling a lawyer.
The problem? Morgan didn’t have one.
The Bureau’s legal counsel wouldn’t intervene in a case where one of their own was being charged. It had to be someone who knew him, someone who would believe in him.
There was only one person who fit that description.
A.D.A. Woodvale.
So, after issuing an emergency recall for Reid, Prentiss, Jareau, Garcia, and Rossi—Hotch called you.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
One thing some victims, or their families, do after the person who ruined their lives is convicted is express gratitude. Sometimes immensely, sometimes barely—especially when the verdict isn’t what they had hoped for.
Still, they are grateful for your time and commitment to their pain. That’s why some send gifts like baskets filled with fruit, chocolates, candy, or all three combined. 
You were at your desk, late at night, again, reviewing case files and drafting a legal brief, absorbed in the task at hand. The basket with its chocolates, and cookies remained sitting on a chair near the window, quietly out of place among the legal paperwork without any card or name, maybe they forgot to put it or it fell on the way. 
The phone rings, and you answer immediately, announcing yourself. When the voice on the other end speaks your name, you recognize it instantly.
“I’m gonna need your help.” Agent Hotchner.
You straighten your back. “What is it? A warrant? It’s going to be hard at t—”
He cuts you off. “Morgan is in trouble.” That was enough to tell you this wasn’t just any ordinary favor.
You hesitate, cautious. “What happened?”
“He was arrested as a suspect in a homicide in Chicago.” Morgan? Homicide? For a moment, you’re ready to refuse—this isn’t your field. You put people in jail, not get them out. But then you remember—he saved your life over a year ago. And the weight of that debt settles heavily on your shoulders.
“Hotch, I... What do you want me to do? I don’t have connections there. Maybe I could talk to—”
He interrupts again. “He’s going to need a good lawyer. I know this isn’t what you do, but you know him. You know he’s not capable of something like that.” There’s a brief silence as you weigh your options, considering your next move.
"The jet takes off first thing tomorrow morning," he says, giving you an out, leaving the decision in your hands.
You exhale, and resolve settling in. "Send me the details. I’ll be there."
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
As you stepped onto the jet, you spotted Hotch already seated alone. Without hesitation, you slid into the seat across from him, greeting him with a quiet nod, your back turned toward the entrance.
One by one, the rest of the BAU arrived, offering you brief acknowledgments as they settled in. When Reid stepped onto the jet, he barely glanced up—until he caught sight of the back of your head. He hesitated for just a second before moving to a seat diagonal from yours.
Hotch quickly explained that you were joining them to assist Morgan as his defense counsel. The weight of the situation settled over the jet, unspoken but palpable. You noticed it in the way the air felt heavier, in the subtle shifts of the team’s expressions, like how Prentiss shifted in her seat or the way Reid’s lips pressed into a thin line.
Since the Katie Jacobs case, he wouldn’t call it an obsession—that would be an exaggeration, and his mind rejected the idea of something so unscientific, but a fixation? Perhaps. There was something about you that tugged at the edges of his thoughts more often than he liked to admit. His memories of your first meeting were frustratingly blurred, dulled by the lingering fog of withdrawal, but he remembered enough. The way you carried yourself—composed, sharp, unreadable. The precision of your movements, deliberate in a way that suggested control rather than ease. The way your voice stayed measured even when you were angry, like someone who had learned to sharpen their words into weapons rather than waste them on emotion. And your eyes—steady, assessing, like you were always five steps ahead in a game only you could see.
Did you ever place two magnets next to each other and test how close they could be without touching? If they would repel or attract?
Magnets could only get so close before they either locked together or violently repelled each other. If their north poles faced one another—mirrors of the same force—they would push apart, unable to exist in such perfect reflection. But if one turned, aligning its south to the other’s north, the pull would be instant, inevitable.
That was a physicist's way of explaining why, the moment you caught him in the corner of your vision, you noted how his hair was longer than before, tucked behind his ears; how his fingers brushed over the pages of a book, a well-worn paperback pulled from his bag. Crime and Punishment. The same one you had almost mistaken for yours once. North. North.
But now, seeing it again, you wondered—what did he think about Raskolnikov’s theory of extraordinary men? Did he believe true morality could be measured mathematically, the way Raskolnikov tried to justify his crime with cold logic? Or did he see through it, past the numbers, past the equations, past the desperate rationalizations of a man trying to convince himself he was above consequence?
And what would he think about your take on it? That a man was either a fool for failing to control himself or a coward for refusing to own what he had done? Either way you just wanted to know his opinion. North. South.
You were just about to ask him when JJ spoke up. “I don’t understand. Can you even represent Morgan if you’re an A.D.A.? Wouldn’t that be a conflict of interest?”
It was a fair question, one you had asked yourself last night before finding a loophole.
You let out a slow breath, considering. "Technically, I’m not Morgan’s lawyer—he hasn’t called me personally to represent him. And I wouldn’t be joining you as his defense attorney… officially." You glanced at Hotch. "Prosecutors consult on defense cases all the time—off the record. I’m not filing any motions, I’m not putting my name on anything. I’m just… advising."
Prentiss raised an eyebrow. "Advising?"
You exhaled, running a hand through your hair. "I can’t officially defend him, but that doesn’t mean I can’t help. And the police don't need to know every detail about that."
Hotch gave a small nod. "That keeps you in the clear. No official involvement, no risk to your career."
Reid, who had been silent, finally spoke. "But what happens if they’ve already decided Morgan is guilty?"
Your jaw tightened, but Rossi answers first "Then that’s where we come in. We find out who’s setting Morgan up—and we make sure they don’t get away with it."
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
As you arrived at the police station, you hung back from the group, not wanting to interfere with the BAU’s process. But when Detective Dennison refused to take Hotch to see Morgan, you decided you wouldn’t stand by quietly anymore.
You stepped forward, standing next to Hotch. “Are you going to take us to see Derek Morgan, or not, Detective?”
He glanced at you as though he didn’t understand the urgency. “Detective Gordinski's in with the suspect now”
“Now is when we need to see him.” you shot back.
“Excuse me?” he started to respond, but Hotch cut him off.
“I have your superintendent's personal cell number,” Hotch said calmly. “And, in the interest of not running roughshod over another police agency, I’ve resisted calling him so far. We need to see Agent Morgan now.”
You couldn’t help but think how Hotch was finally getting some work done.
The detective nodded and, after disappearing into a room, came back with another man. Detective Gordinski, you assumed. It was something you were used to, this unspoken assumption that you were a junior, a minor player in the room, because of your age. It happened often when older men met you—defense attorneys, paralegals, specialists, and even police officers. They assumed you were less than you were. Gordinski was no different. When he approached you, he only offered his hand to Hotch.
“Detective Gordinski, CPD,” he said, as if you weren’t standing right there.
Hotch didn’t seem to notice the slight. “You think an FBI agent, a BAU profiler, committed a homicide?”
Gordinski answered with a level of pride that made your stomach turn. “Actually, three homicides at least, over 15 years.”
You heard JJ and Reid protest, both equally shocked by his ridiculous statement. And the way Gordinski spoke, as though the case was already closed, irritated you. “Has he been charged with anything?”
“I’ve got 72 hours for that,” he replied, clearly still lacking sufficient evidence.
“We’d like to see him,” you said, your tone final. He hesitated for a moment, then reluctantly agreed as Denninson took you and Hotch to see Morgan.
As you entered the interrogation room, you found him in a sort of trance, staring at a photograph in his hands. When he finally looked up, there was a flicker of surprise in his eyes.
“You okay?” you asked, aware of the detective’s overbearing presence in the room.
Morgan exhaled sharply, turning the photo toward you. “This kid—I was with him yesterday.”
“So?” Hotch prompted.
Morgan shook his head, his voice tight. “So, he’s dead. I drove him home, Hotch, and Gordinski’s saying I was the last person seen with him.” His gaze flickered between the two of you, frustration and disbelief written all over his face.
You didn’t need to analyze the detective’s stance to know he had already made up his mind—his persistence was nothing more than a show, an act to reinforce a conclusion he had already reached. But the look in Morgan’s eyes told you everything you needed to know. He cared about that kid.
Turning to the detective, you asked smoothly, “Is there a more private place where I can speak with my client?”
The man hesitated, taken aback. Up until this moment, you hadn’t explicitly stated that you weren’t an agent. His expression tightened. “I’m afraid we don’t have another space for you and the suspect,” he replied with a forced smile.
You returned his look with a cool, unwavering stare. “You do know that any conversation between me and him falls under lawyer-client privilege, right?”
His mouth opened in protest, but you didn’t give him the chance.
“And denying us the proper privacy means that any so-called evidence you think you can get from this interrogation would be inadmissible in court. Not to mention, it’s a direct violation of SSA Morgan’s constitutional rights.” Your tone remained calm, professional—not threatening. Not yet.
The detective narrowed his eyes but gave a short, forced nod, his polite smile not reaching them. “I’ll see what we can do.”
That was code for We’re not doing a damn thing, but we’ll make this as difficult as possible.
Fine. You’d play their game. But first, you needed to find out exactly what they had on Morgan—and fast.
As you step outside, a harsh voice—too raspy and loud for your liking—carries through the room, discussing evidence. You stay quiet, listening. Being on the other side of the law feels strange, but it’s not difficult. If you know how to prosecute, you know the tricks and games cops play. And if you know your opponent's strategy, it’s easier to disarm them and lead them where you want.
The detective asks Rossi if he’s Agent Gideon, and when the detective explains he was the one who sent the profile that led them to Morgan, you curse Gideon internally. First Reid, now Morgan. 
"It also said the way the body was placed gently on a mattress, not just tossed on the ground, indicated someone who was probably consumed with guilt, especially for the first victim. The exact words are—'with a guilt-ridden offender,' the BAU postulates the first victim is the most important and the unsub may still visit the place of the crime or even the victim himself.'"
Gordinski’s voice drips with conviction. "Care to guess who visits my first victim every time he's in town?"
You notice Reid glance at you, but you keep your focus on the detective, listening carefully as he continues. 
"Then yesterday, another kid ends up dead, and the last person he was with was Derek Morgan. In the boy's pocket, we found one of his FBI business cards, his cell number written on the back. In fact, every time Morgan's in town, he hangs out with kids."
JJ calls it a coincidence.
"A hell of a lot of coincidences," Gordinski retorts.
“I prefer the term 'circumstantial'” you say from the back of the room.
Gordinski turns, sizing you up with an incredulous look—too young, maybe too idealistic. "And you are?"
"Derek Morgan’s attorney." There was no reason to hide anymore, you didn't bother offering your hand.
Gordinski barely reacts before flipping open a file. "Did I mention that your client found the body in 1991? Hidden way back in a vacant lot. Now, don’t they teach you that when a body is hard to find, the person who finds it is always a suspect?"
You do the math quickly, Morgan would have been too young.
And you feel like Reid reads your thoughts when he answers. "There are key pieces of the profile that don't fit, Detective. The age—25 to 35—Morgan was 15 at the time."
"Profile Also says that age is the hardest to predict, and I should never exclude someone simply because of a discrepancy with the age." Gordinski is grasping now, trying to force the facts to fit.
Prentiss speaks up. "What about the speculation that since he didn't leave any evidence at the crime scene, he's likely to have a criminal record or law enforcement knowledge?"
"He may not have had knowledge of law enforcement, but Derek Morgan definitely had a criminal record." He tosses a file onto the table. You open it, scanning the contents. Resisting arrest. Vandalism. Aggravated battery. You inhale deeply.
"So he was a troubled kid, not a murderer. What kind of 15-year-old kills another boy, then deliberately stages the body just to make sure he’s the one to 'find' it?" Your voice is sharp, challenging him to walk into your tramp.
Gordinski smirks. "I’m sure you know psychopaths are very smart people, Miss."
Bingo.
You tilt your head. "So, is Morgan a psychopath? A guilt-ridden killer? Or an FBI agent dumb enough to leave his own business card at the crime scene? Because he can’t be all three, and right now you're contradicting yourself, Detective."
The room is silent for a beat. Gordinski clenches his jaw, his grip tightening on the file in his hands. He glares at you like you are his personal enemy.
You don’t give him time to recover. "You're reaching. And I think you know it." you say as you leave the room to look for your client.
And if Reid hadn’t been so mesmerized with the way you had subtly guided Gordinski, he might have given in to the impulse he had to correct him when he addressed you as Miss and not Counselor. 
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.   
Rossi had sent Prentiss and Reid to Morgan’s house to investigate, while you stayed to ensure none of the Detectives would do something sketchy with the proofs.  
Maybe it was the PTSD Dr. Fitzgerald diagnosed you with when you were 11, but the moment Carl Buford entered the room, something felt off. It wasn’t obvious, more like a second nature—a survival instinct that had been honed over the years. You weren’t always right, of course. You’d had a few false alarms before, but this time, something in the air shifted. It wasn’t in his appearance or his words; it was in the way he presented himself—as someone kind, someone willing to help, harmless. But it triggered something in you. The sirens in your brain went on, even if they were faint, too faint to be taken seriously but still enough to be annoying.
Reid had just returned from Morgan’s house when he saw you standing by the board, JJ on the phone and Rossi talking to you. He noticed how you discreetly stifled a yawn, and it hit him—it was nearly evening. The Cheetos packet that probably belonged to JJ and the half-eaten cheese sandwich from Rossi were the only signs of food nearby. It dawned on him that you likely hadn’t eaten all day.
He didn’t want to be the kind of person who overcompensated in an obvious way, but seeing you like this stirred something in him. It reminded him of the last time he saw you at the mall, how you’d instinctively avoided him, as if you couldn’t stand being around him for more than a few seconds. The longest you’d managed to stay in the same spot was 8.12 seconds.
That had been the last time, though. Now, things felt different. You were talking to Rossi when Reid approached and offered coffee to everyone. You could tell he was overcompensating—or at least, that’s what you assumed.
Then again, maybe you were reading too much into the moment when he’d slightly quickened his pace as you all entered the police station, holding the door open for everyone. Or maybe he was just anxious about his friend and eager to get inside quickly.
Or when you were rummaging through your bag for a pen, and he handed you one without hesitation. It could have been just a simple gesture, a convenient moment. But you couldn’t help but wonder if there was more to it—if he was trying to do something, anything, to bridge the gap between you.
You felt stupid for liking his gestures, for craving his attention. That’s why you said yes when he offered the coffee—because you couldn’t help it.
And he was happy to do it. He put special care into preparing your cup, even though he hadn’t asked how you took your coffee. Statistically speaking, most people put about two teaspoons of sugar in their coffee, but he didn’t know what you preferred. Maybe you liked it with even more sugar than that, just like he did. Maybe you didn’t use sugar at all, maybe you used honey.
He caught himself before he poured too much, measuring out what he assumed was the “average” amount, then handed it to you with a small, careful smile. There was a brief moment when your fingers brushed, and maybe his lingered for a second longer than necessary.
But when you took a sip, it hit you. The sweetness of the sugar was overwhelming, and the unexplainable presence of Carl Buford seemed to crawl into your mind, making it worse. It was your fault for not telling him no sugar. Your hand froze for a moment as you fought to swallow, your fingers tightening slightly around the cup.
Reid noticed. He saw how you stiffened, how your grip on the cup tightened, and he assumed he’d gotten it wrong. Maybe you didn’t like sugar in your coffee, or maybe you just didn’t like it at all. He felt a pang of regret, thinking he’d misread the situation. He wasn’t sure why, but for a moment, he wondered if he was always this wrong about you. North. North.
You didn’t want to overreact or be rude, so you quickly excused yourself to the bathroom, needing a moment to splash some water on your face and steady yourself. You stared at your reflection in the mirror, silently telling yourself to calm down.
Maybe you were overreacting to Buford. But that thought was short-lived. The moment Hotch and JJ entered the room and she began speaking, confirming what you had already sensed, everything inside you seemed to crack. Carl Buford—the man who was fervently helping the police catch Morgan, was the same one who had written a letter to clear his record. The contradiction hit you like a punch to the gut, and you couldn’t shake the sound of the sirens growing.
You followed Hotch as he approached the interrogation room, your mind racing with the unsettling sense you couldn’t shake. You didn’t even notice Reid following behind you, keeping a respectful distance. Hotch entered the room, and the questioning began.
"Carl Buford." Morgan’s voice was tight, his shoulders tensing at the name. He stood up from the table where his arms had been resting. "What?"
"Carl Buford. He runs the youth center." Hotch's voice was calm, measured, but you could feel the pressure building behind it. From the other side of the glass, you stood in front of the glass, only for a moment, before Reid joined you at a respectful distance.
"What's that got to do with anything?" Morgan's tone was dismissive, brushing off the mention of Buford like the idea of talking about him was unbearable.
"He's responsible for getting your records expunged." The words hung in the air, sharp and deliberate. Maybe it was the steady presence of Reid beside you that kept you grounded, or maybe it was that something about Buford just didn’t sit right with you. The sirens in your head grew louder.
"I told you to stay the hell out of my business." Morgan’s voice rose, defensive, but not with rage—more like a wounded animal cornered by a predator.
"You said you visit the youth center every time you come here," Hotch pressed, not backing down.
"So what?" Morgan spat out the words like they were poison.
"Buford says he hasn't spoken to you in years. Why don’t you visit the man who made your career possible?"
"Damn you, Hotch." Morgan’s fist slammed onto the table as he stood up, knocking the box over in frustration. That was when you knew. The sirens in your brain were deafening now—loud enough to drown everything else out, and you couldn’t ignore it.
The sickness in your stomach was undeniable. You swallowed it down, fighting the urge to leave, but your instincts were already pushing you forward. You grabbed the door handle, taking one last breath before entering.
"Agent Hotchner, I would like to speak to my client." When Hotch didn’t move, still focused on Morgan, you added, "Now."
With a quiet but firm nod, Hotch left the room, his stoic expression unchanged. You sat down in the chair, your mind racing even faster. If you wanted Morgan to trust you—if you wanted to get through to him—you had to give him something first.
“Aren’t you supposed to be defending me? Looking for a way to get me out of here?” he snapped.
“I can’t help you if you’re not honest with me, Derek.”
“I am being honest. I didn’t kill those kids! He has nothing to do with this!”
“Then why is he so eager to help the police?” you shot back.
For a moment, he didn’t say anything—just glared at you, jaw clenched, shoulders tense. You recognized that look. It was the look of someone who had learned, maybe too many times, that the world didn’t always care about the truth.
"Derek I can't do much if you don't trust me." You say as calmly as you can.
Morgan let out a humorless chuckle. “Trust you?” he said, shaking his head. “I barely know you.”
You leaned back slightly in your chair, eyes flickering over him. That’s fair. Trust wasn’t something that could be commanded, especially not in a place like this.
But you also knew what it was like to sit on the wrong side of an interrogation table. To have someone who was supposed to protect you look at you like you were already guilty. To feel like the walls were closing in, no matter how much truth you were screaming.
You swallowed, forcing the memories down before they could surface. If you wanted Morgan to trust you, you had to give him something first.
“Derek… I’m on your side, whether you believe it or not. Not because I owe you one, but because I can recognize someone whose trust was betrayed by the person who was supposed to protect them.” That made him look at you—really look at you. And you hated it. Hated the way he was seeing straight through you.
Being read, being seen—that wasn’t something you allowed often. But Morgan had spent his life reading people, understanding them, profiling them to find the truth. And you had spent your life sharpening your edges, and weaponizing strategically everything you didn’t like. But right now, you were offering him a piece of yours.
You took a slow, measured breath, and even though the room felt too warm, you forced yourself to keep going.
“My parents… my birth parents ran a meth lab in the kitchen,” you said, voice steady, though your hands curled into fists beneath the table. “When I was four, it exploded. I was sent to the hospital with burns, malnutrition, and withdrawal symptoms I didn’t understand. That was the first time CPS got involved. They put me in the system.”
Morgan’s expression didn’t shift, but you saw something flicker behind his eyes. Recognition.
“And if you know anything about the system, you know it’s broken. It fails. It doesn’t protect the people who need it the most,” you continued, your voice steady, but your chest felt tight. “There are cracks in it, and some people…take advantage of that. They play the part, they act like saviors, they pretend to care.” Your voice caught, just for a second. But you forced yourself to push through it. “I know men like Carl Buford. I grew up with one of them.”
Morgan’s jaw tightened. That name—Buford—hit the air like a hammer. You weren’t just asking for trust. You were offering something real. Something raw.
His fingers curled into fists on the table, and for a second, he looked away, shaking his head like he was trying to push a memory aside. But he didn’t deny it. Didn’t challenge you. Because he knew.
“And what happened?” he asked, voice lower now, controlled but heavy.
You exhaled sharply. “I clawed my way out, just like you did, got adopted when I was 8. And when I had the chance, I became the system—to change it the only way it’s possible, from the inside out.”
Morgan let the silence stretch, studying you, his fingers tapping once against the cold metal table. Finally, he let out a breath, something almost like defeat but not quite. “So what now?”
“Now,” you said, straightening, “We stop playing defense.”
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
You stepped out of the room, and though the tremor in your hands had subsided, the warmth lingering on your back remained. Scanning the precinct, your gaze locked onto the person you were looking for—Gordinski.
You strode toward him, your pace sharp, your voice sharper. “Are you going to charge my client with something, or are you just going to keep stalling?”
He smirked, relishing the frustration in your tone. “Miss Woodvale.” The mockery in his voice was deliberate, savoring the way your desperation bled through. “I still have over 40 hours to hold your client as a suspect.”
“Have you found any new evidence? Because all you have is a questionable profile and circumstantial evidence.” You leaned in slightly, wanting to get under his skin. 
“We have motive.” He said it like it was a trophy, something definitive, something final.
You let out a short, dry laugh. “No, you have a grudge. There’s a difference, and if you don’t know it, the jury won’t buy it.” You’d seen stronger cases collapse under weaker arguments.
His jaw tensed as he looked down at you, exhaling through his nose like you were an inconvenience. “Look, we have three dead kids and a family that wants closure. We’re just doing our job.”
You knew it was a low blow. You knew it was too much.
“Oh yeah? I wonder where I’ve heard that before?”
That was exactly why you said it.
Gordinski’s expression twisted as realization struck. One of the other detectives snapped at you, voices rising, the BAU stiffened, and you could already see Hotch preparing to apologize—everything was escalating.
Then— “Hey! What, did we turn him loose?”
The tension shifted. The detectives forgot your words in an instant, all eyes snapping to the officer outside the holding room—where Morgan had been.
Chaos erupted. Gordinski bolted toward the room, Dennison scrambled to dispatch patrols, Prentiss and JJ exchanged alarmed glances.
And that’s when you slipped away. Nobody noticed… Well nobody except Reid. He always had an eye on you, even from a distance.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
The air was cold, and in the rush of the moment, you’d forgotten to grab your coat. But in some strange way, you were grateful for it—the chill seemed to cool the simmering anger that was creeping through your veins as you headed toward the community center.
Morgan walked beside you, leading the way. You kept your head low, ducking behind columns to avoid the patrols that were probably looking for you. The familiar sensation of hiding felt strangely nostalgic—if you closed your eyes, you could almost imagine the cup of coffee in your hand as you walked through the campus at Harvard.
After ten minutes, you spotted a small field with the lights still on. A kid was out there, playing football by himself. Morgan moved closer to him.
“Lookin' good there, kid.”
You stayed a few feet behind, not wanting to interfere.
“I was tryin' to call you.” The kid stopped running and looked at Morgan.
“I’m here now.” Morgan spread his arms, inviting and friendly.
“Who’s that?” The kid glanced at you quickly, signaling toward you with a tilt of his chin. Unable to stay hidden any longer, you stepped onto the field and leaned back against the fencing, crossing your arms.
“Someone I trust. One of mine.” Morgan’s bold words were enough to drop the kid’s defenses.
You stayed silent, as invisible as you could be, observing how the kid tensed and relaxed automatically when Morgan mentioned needing to talk about Buford. You never thought you were good with kids—didn’t know how to act around them without overthinking, constantly looking for signs and flaws.
The more they talked, the more Derek described Buford’s manipulative ways, using his influence to make kids trust him only to exploit that trust, the more the freezing air of Chicago couldn’t keep the heat from rising inside you. Your hands curled into fists, squeezing your sides, wrinkling your shirt.
There were so many sick ways people used to reward or control others. Buford used alcohol and false bonds to make kids feel like adults, while others used toys or candy.
“My oldest brother’s in jail. My sister was paralyzed in a drive-by... She’s eight years old, and I’m all my mom’s got left. I gotta get us outta here.”
No kid should ever carry that kind of weight. No child should feel like enduring abuse is the only way out.
“Carl’s gonna make sure I get into college. Then I can make something of myself.” The gratitude in his voice was painful—the twisted sense of owing someone everything for their attention, their gifts.
You closed your eyes and looked up at the sky, trying to keep yourself from walking into the building alone and finishing whatever it was you had come here to do.
“James, you are something, man. You’re something right here, right now, without Carl Buford.” Morgan’s words hit you hard. He was right. James was someone. He was someone. You were someone, too. Despite everything, you were still breathing, still standing.
A tiny part of yourself felt grateful when you heard James had told Damien about what he was going through, that he had been brave enough to speak up and look for someone who would believe him and would do something about it. Damien knew. Morgan connected the same dots and realized who was staging the whole thing up.
Carl. Motherfucker. Buford.
Derek eventually finished talking to the kid and motioned for you to follow him. You didn’t know what his next move was, but you were backing him up. “Derek?”
He turned to look at you. “Yeah?”
“Whatever you want to do, I have your back.” You knew he saw it in your eyes—an intense, boiling rage that had driven you to places both good and bad. He knew that whatever he was going to do next, you wouldn’t stop him or doubt him.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
He gave you instructions on how to get through the back door of the office. But when you got there, Morgan was already calling him out.
“All these years, I kept my mouth shut. I let you go on being a hero. Carl Buford, my mentor.”
Buford’s back was toward you, and the more he talked, the more the air seemed to thicken with the heat of your rage. Your vision narrowed, blurred at the edges with red. A man. No—a monster. A predator who walked free for far too long, spinning his web of lies, manipulating, violating, ruining.
And he had the audacity to deny it. The smugness in his voice. The complete absence of remorse.
“Whatever lies James told you…” he said so easily, as if that erased the truth. As if that rewrote history.
Your hands clenched so hard they ached. How many lives had he destroyed? How many boys had suffered under his hands? You had seen men like him before—hell, you had been a child under the power of a man like him once. The weight of their hands. The control they wielded. The false kindness that masked something vile.
Your stomach twisted violently as you took in the sight of his office. The trophies. Row after row of gleaming gold, polished plaques. A shrine to his own ego. A testament to the world that this man was trusted, respected, celebrated.
And then you saw it. Dr. Or you think you did
The word burned itself into your mind like a scar. Dr. Calloway. It wasn’t his name, but your hands trembled anyway, your breath coming fast and ragged, and the sirens grew louder and louder. Was it the name? Was it the way the gold glinted under the dim light? Or was it just the overwhelming wrongness of all of this? 
Buford was still talking. Still spewing poison.
“How many lives have I provided? Look at you. You’d probably be dead by now.”
Lives.
Lives he had ruined.
Lives you could still save.
Your fingers curled around the base of a trophy—a heavy one, sharp at the edges. You barely registered the name engraved on it as your grip tightened, your knuckles going white.
For a split second, your mind whispered, Do it. The same one that had accompanied you in moments where you couldn’t move. Moments when your body wouldn’t answer to your orders. The voice of that version of yourself that would unleash violence. Do. It.
But then—Morgan. This wasn’t your moment. This wasn’t your fight.
But if he wanted to tear this office apart, you would hand him every single thing worth breaking. You would burn it to the ground and stand there, just to watch Buford scream as the flames took him.
Morgan’s voice cut through the storm inside your head.
“Actually, I’m saying you have everything to do with making me who I am.”
And so did you. Because this rage—this blistering, all-consuming, blood-boiling rage—was just another scar left by men like him. Men who stole, who twisted, who took and took and took until all that was left was ruin.
The sirens in your mind screamed. The voices clawed at your skull, howling for justice, for vengeance, for something more than just words, more than just silence.
Just like the ghosts of the past. Just like the hands of the past. Just like Calloway in the past. In the present.
Calloway. Buford.
"I never hurt you. You could have said no.”
Your grip on the trophy tightened, the sharp edges digging into your palm, but you barely felt the sting. All you saw was red. All you felt was fire.
"You're under arrest, Carl." The words cut through the haze, sharp and final.
Buford barely had time to react before the officers stepped in, twisting his arms behind his back, snapping cold metal around his wrists. He said something—denial, excuses, more of the same filth that men like him always spewed—but it didn’t matter.
It was over.
The red began to fade. The fire inside you simmered, but the embers still burned low, smoldering beneath your ribs. Your breath came in sharp, uneven pulls as you clenched your fist.
Morgan was still staring at Buford, his jaw tight, his hands balled into fists at his sides.
For a moment, you wondered if he felt it too—that same bone-deep ache, the need to destroy, to make it right in ways the law never could. But then he inhaled, long and slow, and you forced yourself to do the same.
He saw the trophy in your hand, and you expected to find judgmental eyes—eyes that would look at you like you were dangerous, like you had lost control, like you were no better than the man they were dragging away in cuffs.
But there was no judgment in Morgan’s gaze. Just understanding. Maybe even something closer to recognition.
Your fingers trembled around the trophy, your pulse still hammering in your ears, but you couldn’t let go. Not yet. The weight of it felt good in your grip, solid and real. It would’ve been so easy—so easy—to swing, to carve your fury into something tangible.
He must’ve seen it in you. The way your shoulders still heaved, the way your jaw clenched so tight it hurt.
Morgan reached out, slow, steady. Not to stop you. Not to take it away. Just there.
A lifeline, if you wanted it.
You exhaled shakily, then forced your fingers to unclench. The trophy slipped from your grasp, landing with a dull thud against the floor.
Your hands were empty now. But the fire still burned.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
Resting against the wall, breathing heavily, you watched as they took Buford away under your intense gaze. Gordinski approached you.
“Your actions could be taken as obstruction of justice, Counselor,” he said, the sarcasm in your title not going unnoticed.
An old man threatening you, just to scare you and gloat himself, a pathetic move, especially now when there were still remains of the fire, not ashes yet. You sighed, as if too tired to deal with him, not even bothering to look his way. “And what are you going to do? Arrest me?” You finally glanced at him. “I have the General Attorney one phone call away, and I could charge you with misconduct and Sixth Amendment violation, which could dismiss the case you have been working for so long.”
You let the words sink in for a second while he remained serious. “You got your guy Detective. Walk away while you can.” 
Like in chess, any smart player knows when to retreat. He glared at you but ultimately backed off.
From the corner of your eye, you noticed Reid watching. For a moment, you couldn’t help but return his stare. But then, lifting your chin, you towards the SUV, ignoring the strange sting of shame, the kind of shame you feel when you want to show the best version of yourself to someone, only to show the worst. It wasn’t the first time you had talked your way out of a charge, but it was the first time you felt ashamed of doing it.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
You and Morgan were the last to board the jet. After last night, you'd talked—just not about the… incident. He'd invited you to the grave of the unidentified child with him and his family, and, for some strange reason, it had brought you a sense of peace. Afterward, you joined the rest of the team on the way home.
You spotted Reid sitting by the window, absorbed in his book. North. South. You weren’t one to judge anyone’s demons, especially when you couldn’t even control your own. Maybe that’s why you sat in front of him. Maybe you were tired of pretending you didn’t want to know what was going on in his head.
When he noticed you, his eyes widened slightly, and his fingers nervously traced the edge of the page. Was this it? Would you confront him? Would he finally have the chance to explain himself?
"Do you think Raskolnikov ever believed he deserved the punishment?" you asked, your voice quiet but firm, meeting his gaze. "Or did he just convince himself he was too special to face it?"
Reid blinked, clearly caught off guard, but after a beat, he answered. "I think Raskolnikov believed he was above it all. That his intelligence and theories made him different. But that’s the tragedy—he never understood that punishment isn’t just about what you deserve. It’s about confronting what you’ve done. The guilt you carry. Sometimes, it’s about having someone who believes in you, even when you can’t believe in yourself." His voice softened with the words, as if careful not to scare you off.
You didn’t break eye contact, letting the weight of his words settle. After a pause, you glanced back down at the book. "Someone like Sonia?"
Reid’s gaze flickered, sensing the shift in the conversation. You weren’t just talking about Raskolnikov anymore. Maybe it was about him. Maybe about you. "Someone like Sonia," he said quietly. "She believed in him, not because he was special, but because she saw his humanity. Sometimes, it’s not about whether someone deserves forgiveness—it’s whether someone else is willing to help them find it."
A quiet tension lifted from your shoulders, and your expression softened, the unspoken understanding between you both almost palpable in the air. North. South.
             .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.    
By lunchtime the next day, the events of the prior day still gnawed at you. The feeling only worsened when your eyes landed on the basket sitting in the corner of your office, filled with chocolates and candy.
Taking a deep breath, you picked it up and turned to your temporary assistant, a guy covering for Molly while she was on maternity leave. “I’m stepping out for twenty minutes,” you told him.
Basket in hand, your thoughts blurred together as you walked toward the park. It was a familiar refuge, a place where kids and elderly chess players gathered, lost in their games. A little distraction wouldn’t hurt. It would be good for you to clear your mind, and they always appreciated it when you brought baskets like these or treats from your mom’s bakery.
            .˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘⋅.˳˳.⋅∘ ˚ ˚∘.˳˳.               
part IV
So we finally see more of reader's past! been waiting for this since i started drafting the story in my mind. You'll know more the next chapter!      Feedback feeds motivation! Likes, reblogs and comments are all appreciated <3 Tag list: @arialikestea @hellsingalucard18 @pleasantwitchgarden @torturedpoetspsychward @cultish-corner<3
504 notes · View notes
olive-main · 3 months ago
Note
Hi hi! Ive just stumbled across your writing and i adore it so much! You capture Azriel so perfectly!! I don't really have much of a specific request in mind (but trust me, I'll think of one and come back if that's okay??) But could I ask for something with our Az and a super strong, independent, sarcastic reader. I just love the idea of totally smitten Azriel and just all the fluff. I'm so sorry this is so vague but
Happy holidays!!
No Damsels Here
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Summary: A fiesty Valkyrie with a sharp wit and the brooding Shadowsinger find their lives slowly intertwined through training, quiet moments, and unexpected gestures, leading them to realize there may be a growing connection they can no longer ignore.
Wc: 2.7k
A/N: Ok be honest, did you hack into my account and read my drafts bcs….I had just the fic for this request rotting for far too long. I hope you enjoy, it’s not my fav since I think my writing is better now hence why it’s been in my drafts lol and it’s like semi proofread—BUT thanks to this request y’all get more fluff. Everyone say thank you! :b
Masterlist
——
The morning air is cool and sharp, biting at your skin as you jog toward the training ring, late as usual. The sun hasn’t fully risen yet, its rays barely spilling over the horizon, but Nesta is already there stretching, as she is every morning. Ever the Valkyrie.
“You’re late,” she remarks as you step onto the mat beside her.
“Fashionably late,” you correct, tying your hair back. “Besides, I needed an extra five minutes of sleep. Someone decided to keep me up last night with her endless talking about smutty romance novels.”
Nesta doesn’t bother to hide her smirk. “Don’t act as if you’re not interested in my books.”
Before you can retort, Cassian’s booming voice cuts through the quiet. “Alright, enough about your romance book things. You’re here to train, not gossip.”
You glance over the training grounds, your eyes instinctively flicking toward the familiar figure standing on the far edge of the ring. Azriel is adjusting the strap of his leathers, his wings half-furled behind him as he surveys the weapons laid out with his usual quiet focus.
Nesta catches the direction of your gaze and nudges you with her elbow. “Still brooding, isn’t he?”
“He’s not brooding,” you reply, a little too defensively. “He’s… serious.”
Nesta gives you a knowing look but doesn’t press further as Cassian begins pairing everyone off for sparring.
“Y/N,” Cassian calls, grinning wickedly. “You’re with Azriel today.”
You blink, trying not to focus on how your heart jumped. Across the ring, Azriel’s eyes meet yours, and for a moment, you think you see the faintest hint of amusement in his expression.
Sparring with Azriel is both exhilarating and frustrating. He’s fast—almost impossibly so—and he moves with a precision that leaves no openings. You’re strong and quick on your feet, but against Azriel, every strike feels like a gamble.
“You’re hesitating,” he murmurs, dodging your swing with ease.
“I’m calculating,” you snap back, twisting to block his next move.
His lips twitch, the faintest ghost of a smile. “You’re thinking too much.”
“And you’re talking too much,” you retort, aiming a strike at his side.
He blocks it effortlessly, his wings shifting slightly as he steps into your space. For a moment, you’re close enough to catch the faint scent of cedar and something darker, something so distinctly him.
“Focus,” he says, his voice low and even, and you can’t help the way your pulse quickens.
But you don’t let him see that. Instead, you smirk and lunge to the left before sweeping his legs out from under him. He lands on his back with a soft thud, his wings flaring slightly to cushion the fall.
“Gotcha,” you say, planting your hands on your hips.
Azriel props himself up on one elbow, looking up at you with an expression that’s almost impressed. “Not bad.”
“Not bad?” you echo, laughing. “That was a textbook takedown.”
From across the ring, Cassian claps his hands. “That’s my girl! Show him who’s boss, Y/N!”
You smile proudly at Cassian, bowing exaggeratedly before turning back to Azriel with a proud smirk.
“Again?” he asks, his tone calm but with a flicker of challenge in his eyes.
“Obviously,” you reply, and the sparring begins anew.
You’re sitting on the edge of the ring after the session, toweling the sweat from your face as the others disperse. Nesta sits beside you, nursing a bottle of water and watching Azriel, who’s speaking quietly with Cassian.
“You know he likes you, right?” Nesta says, breaking the silence.
You choke on your water. “What?”
Nesta gives you a look, one brow arched in that infuriatingly smug way of hers. “Don’t play dumb. He’s been watching you all morning.”
“He watches everyone,” you argue, though your voice lacks conviction.
“Not like this,” Nesta counters. “Trust me, I’ve seen the way he looks at you. It’s different.”
You shake your head, refusing to entertain the idea. “He’s just… observant. It’s his job.”
Nesta doesn’t respond, but her silence is louder than words.
Over the next few weeks, you start to notice the little things. The way Azriel lingers near you during training, offering quiet pointers or stepping in to demonstrate a move. The way he always seems to know when you’re pushing yourself too hard, handing you a water bottle or calling for a break just as your muscles start to protest.
And then there are the gloves. The day before you’d worn down your leather gloves to their last seam, small tears at the knuckles.
You find them waiting for you one morning, neatly folded and left on the bench where you always sit. They’re sleek and well-crafted, the leather soft and pliable. With your name written on a piece of parchment laid neatly on them, in his writing.
“Nice gloves,” Nesta remarks as you slip them on.
“They’re… new,” you say, frowning slightly.
“Azriel left them,” she says, her tone far too casual.
You freeze, glancing at her. “How do you know that?”
Nesta smirks. “Because I saw him put them there.”
You open your mouth to respond, but before you can, Azriel approaches, his expression as unreadable as ever.
“Do they fit?” he asks, his gaze flicking to the gloves.
You nod, flexing your fingers. “Perfectly. Thank you.”
He inclines his head, his lips curving into the faintest smile before he turns and walks away.
“Hopeless,” Nesta mutters under her breath, but you don’t bother arguing this time.
It’s late one evening when Azriel finds you sitting on the balcony of the House of Wind, staring out at the twinkling lights of Velaris below.
“Couldn’t sleep?” he asks, his voice soft as he steps into the night air.
You glance over your shoulder, surprised but not unwelcome. “Something like that.”
He leans against the railing beside you, his wings folding neatly behind him. For a while, neither of you speaks, the quiet stretching between you like a warm blanket.
Finally, Azriel breaks the silence. “Something is on your mind”
“Oh? Am I that easy to see through Shadowsinger?” you ask, turning to face him.
“No, not always” he says, his hazel eyes meeting yours. “But you only come out here when something is.”
You hesitate, unsure how to respond. But before you can, he continues, his voice low and steady.
“You don’t have to tell me,” he says. “But if you ever want to, I’m here.”
The sincerity in his tone takes you off guard, and for a moment, all you can do is stare at him.
“Thanks,” you say finally, your voice softer than usual.
He nods, his gaze lingering on you for a heartbeat longer before he turns back to the view.
The silence stretches, comfortable but crackling with unspoken words. You lean your elbows on the railing, the cool metal pressing against your skin. Azriel doesn’t move, his presence steady beside you, a quiet sort of comfort.
“So,” you say at last, breaking the stillness. “Is brooding a full-time job for you, or do you just do it in your free time?”
His lips twitch, though he doesn’t take his eyes off the city below. “Depends. Are you asking because you want tips?”
A laugh escapes you, sharp and unrestrained. “Please, I could out-brood you any day of the week.”
Azriel turns his head slightly, enough that you can see the amusement flickering in his hazel eyes. “I’d like to see you try.”
“Oh, you will,” you quip, straightening up and crossing your arms. “But don’t come crying to me when I leave you in the shadows.”
“I don’t cry,” he replies smoothly, his expression as impassive as ever.
You snort, shaking your head. “No, of course not. The great spymaster of the Night Court doesn’t have emotions, right?”
His mouth curves into the faintest smile, and for a moment, you swear you see something softer beneath the usual calm exterior.
“Wrong,” he says quietly.
The sincerity in his tone catches you off guard, and for once, you’re at a loss for words. Before you can respond, Azriel shifts, his wings rustling softly as he straightens.
“I should let you get some sleep,” he says, his voice low and even.
“Sure,” you reply, recovering quickly. “I’ll need it for when I take you down in training tomorrow.”
His soft chuckle is the last thing you hear before he disappears into the shadows, leaving you alone with your racing thoughts.
The next morning, you’re determined to shake off the lingering feelings from last night. You throw yourself into training with a vengeance, sparring with Nesta and Cassian until your muscles burn and your breath comes in ragged gasps.
But no matter how hard you push yourself, you can’t ignore the fact that Azriel’s eyes are on you. He’s not overt about it, of course—he never is. But you’ve gotten good at reading him.
“Do you think he’s capable of blinking?” you mutter to Nesta during a break, jerking your chin in Azriel’s direction.
Nesta smirks, following your gaze. “Why? Is it distracting you?”
“Hardly,” you scoff. “I just don’t want him pulling something from all that intense staring.”
“Maybe he’s impressed,” Nesta says, her tone teasing.
You roll your eyes. “He’s impressed by my fighting skills, obviously. Who wouldn’t be?”
“Obviously,” Nesta echoes, her smirk growing.
“Don’t start,” you warn, grabbing your water bottle.
Nesta raises her hands in mock surrender, but you can see the gleam in her eye.
After training, you’re stretching near the edge of the ring when Azriel approaches. You glance up, noting the slight crease in his brow as he surveys the scrape on your arm.
“You should get that looked at,” he says, nodding toward the cut.
“It’s nothing,” you reply, brushing it off. “Barely a scratch.”
Azriel doesn’t look convinced. He crouches beside you, pulling a small vial of salve from his pocket.
“Hold still,” he murmurs, reaching for your arm.
You consider protesting, but the look in his eyes stops you. So instead, you sit there, watching as his fingers work with careful precision, his touch surprisingly gentle.
“You know, this is the second time you’ve fussed over me this week,” you say, breaking the silence. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were trying to impress me.”
Azriel doesn’t look up, but you catch the faintest hint of a smile on his lips. “Is it working?”
The question takes you off guard, and for a moment, you’re not sure how to respond. So instead, you settle for sarcasm.
“Not yet,” you say, grinning. “But keep trying. You might get there eventually.”
His quiet laugh sends warmth curling through your chest, and as he finishes wrapping your arm, you find yourself wishing the moment would last a little longer.
Later that evening, you’re in the kitchen with Nesta, raiding the cabinets for a late-night snack.
“So,” she says casually, popping a grape into her mouth. “What’s going on with you and Azriel?”
You freeze mid-reach, turning to glare at her. “What do you mean, ‘what’s going on?’”
Nesta shrugs, far too nonchalant. “I mean, he practically hovered over you all day. And don’t think I didn’t notice him patching you up earlier.”
“It was a cut,” you say defensively. “Hardly life-threatening.”
“Uh-huh.” Nesta leans against the counter, studying you with those sharp eyes of hers. “And the gloves? Or the way he’s always watching you during training?”
You groan, pinching the bridge of your nose. “You’re imagining things.”
“I’m really not,” Nesta replies, a sly smile creeping onto her face.
“Well, even if he does… like me, that’s his problem,” you say, crossing your arms. “I’m not some damsel in distress, waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet.”
“No,” Nesta agrees, smirking. “But maybe you’re someone who could use a little… sweeping.”
You throw a grape at her, and she laughs, ducking out of the way.
The realization of Azriel’s attention lingers in your mind longer than you’d like to admit. You try to shake it off—try to convince yourself that it’s just his nature to watch everyone, to care quietly. But there’s a warmth to his gaze when it falls on you, a softness that feels different, deliberate.
And once you notice it, you can’t stop seeing it.
Like during training the next day, when Cassian barks at everyone to do laps. You’re running alongside Nesta, your legs burning and breath hitching, when Azriel quietly falls into step beside you.
“Don’t overthink your breathing,” he murmurs, his voice low enough that only you can hear.
You glance at him, eyebrows raised. “I’m not overthinking it.”
His lips twitch, almost imperceptibly. “You were counting your breaths.”
You narrow your eyes, your tone laced with mock offense. “You’re watching me breathe now? That’s not creepy at all.”
Azriel doesn’t rise to the bait, but the faintest smirk graces his lips. “Just trying to help.”
“Uh-huh,” you reply, rolling your eyes. But when you refocus on your breathing, following his advice, the run feels a little easier.
A few days later, you find yourself in the House of Wind’s library, searching for a book Nesta recommended, the one she had mentioned to you a few days ago. You’re muttering under your breath, cursing the ridiculously high shelves, when a familiar voice speaks behind you.
“Need help?”
You whirl around to find Azriel standing there, a faint smile tugging at his lips.
“Not unless you’ve got a ladder hidden somewhere,” you reply, crossing your arms.
Azriel steps closer, his wings shifting as he glances up at the shelf. “Which one?”
You point to the book near the top, and without a word, Azriel extends a wing, brushing it against the shelf as he pulls the book down with practiced ease.
He hands it to you, his fingers brushing yours briefly. “There.”
You take the book, trying not to let the warmth of his touch distract you. “Thanks. I guess having wings is good for more than just flying, huh?”
His smile widens slightly. “They’re versatile.”
“Show-off,” you mutter, but there’s no bite to your tone.
Azriel doesn’t respond, just tilts his head as if studying you. The silence stretches, heavy but not uncomfortable, and you find yourself wondering what’s going on behind those hazel eyes.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” you ask finally, your voice sharper than you intend.
Azriel blinks, as though pulled from his thoughts. “Like what?”
“Like you’re trying to figure something out,” you say, narrowing your eyes.
He hesitates, his gaze steady but unreadable. “Maybe I am.”
Before you can press him further, he nods toward the book in your hands. “Enjoy your reading.” And then he’s gone, slipping back into the shadows as easily as he came.
The tension between you grows, subtle but undeniable. It’s not something you can ignore anymore—not when his gaze lingers just a second too long, or when his words carry a weight you can’t quite name.
One evening, after another long day of training, you find yourself wandering the halls of the House of Wind. You end up on the same balcony where Azriel joined you that night, the city lights below twinkling like stars.
You’re not surprised when he appears again, his presence so quiet you almost don’t notice until he’s standing beside you.
“Do you ever sleep?” you ask, glancing at him.
“Rarely,” he admits, his voice soft.
“Figures,” you mutter, leaning against the railing.
The silence stretches, but this time, it feels charged, as though both of you are waiting for the other to speak.
Finally, Azriel breaks the quiet. “You confuse me.”
You blink, turning to face him. “What?”
“You’re strong, stubborn, sarcastic…” He trails off, his lips curving slightly. “But you care. Even when you try not to show it.”
You stare at him, caught off guard by the honesty in his tone. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means,” he says, his gaze meeting yours, “that you make it very difficult to stay in the shadows.”
His words hang in the air, and for once, you don’t have a witty comeback. You’re too busy trying to process the way your heart is racing, the way his eyes seem to see straight through you.
“Well,” you say finally, your voice quieter than usual. “Maybe it’s time you stepped out of them.”
Azriel’s smile is small, but it’s real. And in that moment, with the stars above and the city below, you feel something shift between both of you—something neither of you are sure you can ignore anymore. Not when he feels that golden thread that glows in his chest, connecting his soul to yours.
——
Are y’all interested in a tag list?? I’m gonna be more consistent in posting hehe.
Thank you for reading my lovely humans. Requests are still very open ;)
426 notes · View notes
deadrobinthoughts · 11 days ago
Text
†  realizing he’s in love (in the worst, most sudden ways possible) : tim.
Tumblr media
♦ sub title: aka, tim saying "oh" a lot. ♦ request: yes; just tim stuff ( none of this is my usual in depth style. ) ♦ beta’d: nope ♦ a/n: one of my shorter, tiny blurb drafts for all my tim anons. this is, 100%, shit writing. + gonna add a little thing here rq since i've been asked about it: tim, canonically, does drink a lot of caffeine lol and his sleep issues are not related to that. i am fully aware - i grew up reading these comics? i am also aware he is not actually the coffee addict of the family ---- that would be, very well known, barbara. so please don't get bent in my inbox thinking i don't know things about the characters i am writing lol ive spent just about all 26 years of my life with them. i actually have a whole, old, post about his lover switching him to hot chocolate because /caffeine/.
When You Call Him Yours (Casually, Like It’s Nothing)
it happens in the middle of a mission debrief.
you’re standing next to him, arms crossed, expression sharp as you go over details with the team. tim’s half-listening, skimming data on his tablet, fully absorbed in work mode until you say something offhandedly.
"well, yeah, but tim’s mine, so obviously i trust his intel."
tim’s brain short-circuits.
his fingers freeze over the tablet screen, breath catching, stomach flipping so violently that he might actually be dying.
yours.
you called him yours.
the conversation continues without him while he’s just standing there, processing, staring at nothing, trying to reboot his entire existence.
by the time he finally snaps out of it, the conversation is over, and you’ve already walked off.
tim just stands there, blinking, feeling like he’s been hit by the batmobile.
“oh,” he mutters to himself, completely dazed.
When He Instinctively Pulls You Into His Lap (Without Thinking)
it’s late. you’re both exhausted, curled up on the couch at the manor, half-watching a movie neither of you are paying attention to. tim’s mostly staring right past the screen, and you’re leaning against him, half-asleep, boneless and warm.
and then, without even thinking, tim just moves.
one hand grabs your wrist, the other tugs at your waist - effortless, casual, instinctual. in one smooth motion, you’re in his lap, legs draped over his, his arms lazily settling around you.
you blink, startled. "tim?"
tim, meanwhile, is absolutely not functioning.
because oh, shit.
he didn’t even think about it.
it was natural. automatic.
like his body just knew you belonged there.
“oh,” he says blankly, blinking rapidly. “uh. sorry.”
you tilt your head, clearly not bothered, just amused. "are you? because you haven’t let go."
tim looks down and he is, in fact, still holding you.
tightly.
like he has no intention of letting go.
“…huh.”
When He Catches Himself Staring (For Way Too Long)
you’re just talking. laughing about something, gesturing with your hands, eyes bright and expressive.
tim is listening. he thinks.
actually, no.
he’s staring.
hard.
like he’s trying to commit every tiny detail to memory - the curve of your lips, the way your nose scrunches slightly when you laugh, the way your hands move when you talk.
and then?
you catch him.
you pause mid-sentence, raising an eyebrow. "tim?"
tim blinks. realizes. malfunctions.
he was just staring at you. like an idiot.
for god knows how long.
“oh,” he says, clearly panicking. “uh. yeah. sorry. i—"
you smirk, leaning in slightly. "you okay there, boy genius?"
tim, whose entire brain just blue-screened? absolutely not okay.
he just clears his throat aggressively and looks anywhere but at you.
“fine,” he mutters, ears red. "totally fine."
When He Lets You Take His Coffee Without Complaining (And That’s… Not Normal)
tim does not share coffee. he does not share most things.
it is a known fact. a rule. a law of the universe.
but then one morning, you take his cup right out of his hands.
no hesitation. no asking.
just a casual theft.
and instead of stopping you - instead of glaring or grabbing it back like he normally would;
tim just lets you.
no argument. no protest. nothing. just continues with what he was telling you.
jason, sitting across the room, watches the whole thing and immediately loses his shit.
“oh my god,” jason cackles, pointing at tim like he’s a science experiment. “you’re so fucking gone.”
tim blinks, confused. “what?”
jason gestures wildly. “you just let them take your coffee, dude. you don’t even let bruce take your coffee.. you tried to threaten alfred once.”
tim opens his mouth. closes it. turns to look at you, where you’re happily sipping his coffee without a care in the world.
“oh,” he mutters. "oh, shit."
you pause, glancing between them. "what’s happening?"
jason grins like it’s the funniest thing in the world. "tim just realized he’s in love with you."
tim chokes on air.
you blink. “…just now?”
jason nods.
tim groans, face in his hands.
When You Leave for a Few Days, and He Absolutely Cannot Handle It
it’s just a short trip. three days, tops. nothing serious.
tim thinks he’ll be fine.
he is not fine.
the first day? manageable.
the second day? sucks.
the third day? absolute hell.
when did he become so.. attached? he has no idea.
he doesn’t sleep right. he doesn’t focus. he keeps checking his phone, scrolling through old messages, rereading things just to feel like you’re still close.
and when you finally come back?
tim doesn’t even hesitate.
the second he sees you, he’s pulling you in; arms tight, head tucked into your shoulder, breathing you in like he’s been drowning without you.
you freeze for a second, startled.
then, softly—“missed me, huh?”
tim exhales shakily, something he refuses to acknowledge. doesn’t even try to deny it. just holds you tighter and mutters into your skin;
"don’t ever leave me that long again."
and that’s when he knows.
he’s never letting you go.
Bonus: What Happens After Tim Realizes He’s in Love
Denial. He will fight for his life trying to pretend like he’s fine.
Overthinking. Oh, you thought he was bad before? Now he’s worse.
Jason making fun of him. Every chance he gets.
Dick being proud. “Aww, my baby brother’s in love!”
Tim finally accepting it and immediately becoming the softest, most devoted partner of all time. ( he just isn't great at it all the time. because ---- long story short; he will forget. )
217 notes · View notes