#its not activism or care for human rights its nihilism
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Sometimes just from someone's username you know they would reblog a post that's like omg Trump will do genocide and Harris will do genocide but with emojis and memes!!
And then you see that they did in fact reblog the post and you're like ohhh can we stop pretending this is any kind of leftism.
#like- part of leftism is actually talking about things#e.g. the fact is that governments have all these complicated alliances with other countries#that each administration inherits- and in global wars this affects how they act towards each country#and yeah its fucking shitty! that all our world leaders will participate in wars! personally im anti war!#but this whole bleakism both sides are the same on foreign policy so we shouldnt fuckin bother voting#its not activism or care for human rights its nihilism#you can tell its not care for human rights because so many people like this idolise countries who#also are doing war crimes and terrorism and human rights abuse#and they dont really have a justification or argument for their admiration of these countries other than#'well this country is no different to [x western country] and you think that is ok riiight?'#i mean...if by ok you mean 'the country exists and will continue to exist and i live there and also vote there'#like...damning with faint praise#anyway look i have to admit i don't understand the social media aspect of us elections#the meme-y stuff that comes directly from the campaign trail- dont get it thats not a thing in the uk#but one thing i am absolutely certain of is that both sides do it!#anyway also dont reblog weird 'genocide- yaaas queen!' memes about kamala harris when you're white/non-black it makes you look racist.#also to continue the train of thought i abandoned (sorry)- i personally believe countries need leaders and anarchy will never happen#and the 'revolution' will not happen in our lifetime- its not a real revolution they are talking about anyway its some sort of internet one#where nothing goes awry and it all works out for the goodies (us tumblr leftists)#so given that someone is going to lead the us as president and no amount of not voting will change that- i say grow up#ur genocide memes are boring- to be quite frank on a site so focused on the day to day struggles of marginalised people#who live in western countries- no matter what the government does abroad you STILL should vote for the day to day#yeah some people online say voting makes you impure and complicit in genocide but the secret is you have to ignore thrm#youre just a fucking random you cant tell the president what to do about international conflict- give yourself a break yeesh
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this is 2 questions, but they're both a little depressing, sorry
any tips for just keeping up hope? things just seem so awful as of late. ik bad things happen all the time, but it just seems like things are genocide on top of environmental collapse on top of genocide. how can you stay hopeful?
and any tips for enacting change as a minor? i don't have any income to spend on supporting causes, i'm not allowed to go to protests or rallies or anything of the like, i can't vote. i feel so useless. i know there has to be something i can be doing! i just don't know what.
again, sorry if this is. not the sort of thing you'd like to answer, i'd understand completely. feel free to like. ignore this i suppose
your blog seems lovely, it's nice to see someone determined to fight for a better world. i hope you have a wonderful day.
Hi. Thanks for getting in touch, and please don’t apologise for your questions. I’m sorry to hear you’ve been struggling, and I want to start by saying that what you’re feeling is a normal, healthy result of being a caring human being in a world full of cruelty and suffering. This is a really difficult time for the planet and its people and so I’d start by saying you’re allowed to feel dispirited and hopeless, especially as a minor looking around and seeing this is the world you’re growing up in.
This will probably be quite a long answer so I apologise for that, but you’ve caught me on my favourite topic - hope. To begin with, I have a little mantra that I repeat to myself which is that while despair as an emotional response is valid and to be expected, despair as an ideological orientation is not acceptable. What this means is that I allow myself and others slack and compassion at times when the feeling that everything is just too fucked to fix takes over. But I don’t permit myself to stop that from making me act. I take inspiration from people who have survived and are surviving incredible adversity - from the indigenous people who chose to keep living, to keep preserving their language and religion and culture, to keep fighting for their land and bringing children into the world even after everything they recognised about it was gone. We aren’t the first culture to face an apocalypse. Similarly I think of the low-lying islanders and other people in the Global South or the Arctic Circle seeing their means of subsistence or their homes being destroyed by climate change. I know this doesn’t sound at all hopeful on the surface, but I remind myself that these people don’t have the luxury of nihilism or despair. They have to keep trying, again and again, rebuilding the dams and re-roofing their houses and planting again the crops that they lost to extreme weather. If they give up, they die. They don’t need my tears and they don’t want my pity. And so reminding myself of the solidarity I owe them sort of resets my brain into getting-stuck-in-mode.
One of the most important things I have done and would recommend others to do to keep the despondency at bay is to act, to get up each morning and make the choice to do good, even if it’s just being kind and friendly to the people I see that day, or signing an online petition, or planting something in the ground. Sure, these actions won’t change the world on their own, but they contribute. And more importantly, they change you.
The second biggest thing is to control your media diet. That means getting serious about reining in your doomscrolling. The news and social media are full of appalling images right now and I’m not saying you should look away, or pretend it isn’t happening, but you have to remember that you becoming emotionally numbed out and vicariously traumatised doesn’t help the victims of war or environmental disaster. So balance out the negative news by actively seeking out things that are going well in the world. Remember that every day countless people get up determined to make things better. Visit Positive News, The Good News Network, The BBC’s Uplifting Stories Page, and similar sites. Follow Sam Bentley and Zahra Biabani. Read Rutger Bregman and Hans Rosling and Jon Alexander. Remind yourself that the good things happening in the world aren’t cancelled out by the bad ones any more than they cancel out the bad. Look for signs of care in the world around you: see how the old friends at the train station hug tightly when they’re reunited, or how the schoolboy helps his friend with his jacket, or the crowd parts to let the old woman through. These things seem small but they are the groundwork for everything we can achieve together.
I have hope because even in the midst of appalling scenes in the Middle East, aid workers are going in with food and medicine, risking their own lives, journalists are drawing attention to the situation, Israelis (even some with families held hostage) are calling for an end to the bombing, groups of Palestinian and Israeli communities have been working together for decades and will be the first to pick up the pieces when the dust settles, and because thousands are marching for justice and peace all over the world. Sometimes the moments that reveal the worst of humanity show us its best too. ‘Look for the helpers’ is a cliche but it’s genuinely useful.
Hope is also something you work at, a skill to be cultivated like any other, and I have found the writings of Rebecca Solnit hugely helpful in cultivating my own practice of hope. In terms of the environment, solarpunk shares origins with hopepunk, a genre that is all about triumphing (or even just trying your damn hardest) in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds. You don’t have to become a perfect optimist overnight, you don’t even have to be an optimist at all, you can just hope out of spite. Because the last thing that the corrupt politicians and the war criminals and the fossil fuel billionaires and the media commentators want you to think is that things don’t have to be this way and can get better.
Watch the Earthshot Prize Awards Ceremony even though it’s weird and corporate. Get newsletters from MSF or the UN agencies doing good work on the ground. Watch the birds out of your window. Revisit those good news websites regularly to check out the latest stories. Listen to podcasts that imagine a better future (I am working on a resources masterpost so check back in for that). Bake a cake for someone you know who is having a hard time - maybe that someone is you. That’s ok too. We cannot change the world alone but we can hold and soothe some of the pain in it. And take care of yourself - remember that, as Audre Lorde said, self-care is an act of political warfare. Make joy your resistance whenever you can.
This kind of ties in to your second question - how to make change as a minor. I know you don’t have a lot of power but you can still make a difference. See if you can make an environment society or a group of socially conscious students at your school. Talk to your friends about climate change and social justice issues (studies say this is the single action you can take as an individual that has the greatest likelihood of contributing to systemic change - ahead even of giving up flights or going vegan). Talk to your parents if they’re receptive. Talk to siblings and cousins and the guy behind the supermarket counter. Surround yourself with people who want to make things better, if you can. You’d be surprised how much change you can make even just by asking people or institutions to do better - can your school improve its sustainability, for instance? Write to elected officials even though you can’t vote (they don’t need to know that! You don’t need to tell them your age!) and sign petitions if you can’t go to protests. Sneak out to a protest if you feel like rebelling (though make sure a trusted friend knows where you are and follow safety guidelines available online).
Give yourself some grace to mess up and fall short and fail. It’s beyond unfair you have to be worrying about any of these things, but you are, and that’s because you have a big heart. Take some time to cry in your bed if you need it - I know I have over these past few weeks. Then when you’re ready, get up, wipe your eyes, roll up your sleeves and get to work.
#solarpunk#hopepunk#ask#environmentalism#social justice#cottagepunk#optimism#community#climate justice#bright future#you want to help and that itself is powerful#you can’t fix everything#but the trying is the work
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I do get why it's so hard to not fall into hopelessness in times like this but I think it does a great disservice to people in Palestine, Sudan, Congo, Papua New Guinea, everywhere where struggle, fight, and the hope for freedom and justice is burning strong despite the violent opposition and genocide they are facing. We owe our siblings at minimum the same level of hope and fight that we can do everything we can to help, to bear witness and remind others that want to look away that they are complicit in their silence, nihilism, and even active call and action for more violence. If anything I feel like I don't have the right to be hopeless and nihilistic about the state of the world when I'm in a position that, although mired with it's own unique struggles, I do not have to be confronted every waking day and night with the horrors that could befall my loved ones, my people, or me.
I do not believe the world is doomed as long as there are people in the world who are willing to love and care for others in more than just words, but in action of opposition to the forces that want to do further harm towards our marginalized siblings and the planet we share. Its corny as hell maybe, but I still have a lot of faith in our capacity as human beings to do more for each other in ways that could change our lives and the world for the better.
#i keep seeing a bunch of we're doomed shit in the notes and tags of things#related to palestine and its like shut up#if ur not Palestinian or anyone facing an active genocide you dont get to say that#DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT THEN
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do u mind giving me info about the ghosts and stuff
plus a bit of context (e.g. the one with the massive tits) and pronouns/hcs
YIPPEEE. ok im gonna give a quick autistic rundown of every ghost character, and then go on to some headcanons (under the cut). but i also highly suggest watching some lore explanation videos on youtube for more context!!
ok so. the general premise of the band ghost is that there's a satanic church known as the clergy, and they started the band to spread satan's message.
the leader/frontman of the band is given the title of papa emeritus. there have been 5 papa emerituses as of right now.
papa emeritus 0, also known as nihil, was the frontman of ghost in the '60s. he is the canonical father of the other papas (except for copia).
papa emeritus 1, also known as primo, was the frontman of ghost from 2008 to 2012. he failed to get more people interested in satanism, so the clergy replaced him with his younger brother:
papa emeritus 2, also known as secondo, was the frontman of ghost from 2012 to 2015. he also failed, and so they replaced him with the youngest of the emeritus bloodline:
papa emeritus 3, also known as terzo, was the frontman of ghost from 2015 to 2017. he gained attention, and was overall popular, but he lost sight of his mission, and was taken out by the clergy.
so, while searching for a new papa, nihil (now an old man) took over ghost for a while. this is how he was introduced to the fandom.
but eventually, the clergy found a new frontman for ghost: cardinal copia. at first, nihil was opposed to making copia papa, because he's not a part of the bloodline, but still eventually copia became papa emeritus 4, our current papa.
when copia took over the ghost project, all former papas except for nihil were killed. nihil later on died of undisclosed causes, but has since returned in the form of a phantasm (for some fucking reason).
another character you should be aware of is sister imperator, a member of the clergy, and nihil's lover from way back in the '60s. the two broke up after nihil made out with random audience members mid-show. it's also heavily theorized that imperator might be the biological mother of copia.
now, a little about the nameless ghouls:
the nameless ghouls are the masked band members of the band ghost. there have been different sets of ghouls for each era of ghost, but our current ghouls are: sodo (aka dewdrop or fire), rain (aka water), mountain (aka earth), aether (aka quintessence), and swiss (aka multi-ghoul).
there are also ghoulettes, or female ghouls! these are cirrus, cumulus, and sunshine!
it is not known wether the nameless ghouls are human or not, but the fan interpretation is that they're demons, summoned to serve the clergy.
another character you should probably know about: mr. saltarian. our newest character. all we really know about him is that he's a member of the clergy.
NOW ONTO THE HEADCANONS.
ok so. abt the massive tits thing. that would be secondo. idk why its just,,, me (and most of the fandom) are convinced secondo has big tiddies. no real reason behind it's more like a gut feeling.
all of the papas are trans. to me. specifically gender neutral primo (any pronouns), transfem secondo (they/she), genderfluid terzo (he/she), non-binary copia (they/vem). nihil is a he/him lesbian and that is all i have to say on that. same with the ghouls, except they're all agender to some degree, since they don't understand the human experiance of 'gender identities'. none of them care what pronouns they're referred to by, but he/theys and she/theys and obscure neopronouns are preferred.
copia is very very very autistic, i feel like most people can get behind that. constantly wearing gloves, little to no facial expressions, actively failing at social interactions. they just like me fr.
this is kinda off-topic but my favourite ghoul is mountain. idk why i just rlly like them.
oh also a weirdly specific headcanon of mine: sister imperator is estonian. i just feel like that's true.
#i hope this isnt completely incomprehensible lmao#the band ghost#ghost bc#ghost band#ghost#cardinal copia#nameless ghouls#papa nihil#sister imperator#papa primo#papa secondo#papa terzo#papa emeritus#ghost headcanons#the band ghost headcanons#ghoul headcanons#the nameless ghouls
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dude yknow fuck this im fuckin proud of myself like fuck my therapist fuck my parents fuck my teachers they didnt do shit to help me but ive done so much in my life like ive saved someones fuckin life and idc if that persons me i fuckin did that shit everyday and now im here and like i fuckin love life and im constantly angry and constantly in pain and things still suck but it feels like a lot less of a heavy fuckin weight on me everyday and like. yeah man. like things will always fucking suck all the time and ill definitely get to a point in the future where i disagree w what im saying but that wont be bc its wrong itll be bc i need someone to fuckin prove me wrong then. but im provin myself wrong rn. and likeee there r times i get so fucking angry at positivity bc it just feels so fuckin mockin yknow but thats just becauseeee. yea lots a reasons. but right now i am fuckin glad of what ive done n all like. nobody has helped me and ive had to work so goddam hard but. yea man. life is great. im realllll tired now and HAD things i wanted to say but ive lost em now too tired. but like LOOK AT ME. IM TIRED BEFORE MIDNIGHT. this shit rules. and likeeeee i have a million problems w a million friends but i have some real nice fuckin friends as well who im glad exist likeee. it takes sooo much energy to maintain these friendships n bein autistic sure as hell doesnt help BUT ILL DO IT ANYWAYS. bc i love people so so sososoo much and no amount of nihilism or negativity will stop me because i have been at my fucking worst and tryin my best to actively make everyone around me hate me and i just fucking love people so much BC IM FUCKIN HUMAN LIKE !!!! HUMANS LOVE HUMANS !!!! THIS IS JUST WHAT WE DO AND WE CANT FUCKIN ESCAPE IT AND I LOVE IT !!!!! IDC HOW OR WHY OR WHEN OR WHERE PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS LOVE N CARE 4 EACH OTHER DESPITE EVERYTHING AND ANYONE WHO THINKS HUMANITY IS INHERENTLY EVIL CLEARLY DOESNT KNOW WHAT THEYRE TALKING ABOUT BC WE R INHERENTLY FUCKING HUMAN AND TO BE HUMAN MEANS TO BE IN LOVE WITH THE WORLD A FUCKING MEN. the end goodnight sleepy times.
#night thoughts#man i just#im thinkin of the albatrio again#bc like#they display this shit soooo perfectly#and i KNOW im talkin abt bein human and ONE ISNT HUMAN#but im talkin abt real life and irl there r no fish guys#BUT LIKE#the albatrio are so OBVIOUSLY human and i love it#bc likeeee#they love so CLEARLY and they fight FOR LOVE and they DO DUMB SHIT and they HAVE A GOOD TIME#AND EVERYTHING ABT THEM IS SO PAINFULLY OBVIOUSLY RIGHT IN UR FACE HUMAN#AND I LOVE EM#anyways yea#the end
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ha ha, I blame @bittydragon and their Webbed AU. Anyone who knows me knows I started out as an anon on Roman’s blog who spent their time making their AUs extremely dark and angsty. Bitty has now been hit with their Webbed AU. :) I’m calling this the Arachnophobia AU because it’s going to be really dark and keeps activating my own arachnophobia :’) (I have to look up spiders for this AU) Trigger Warnings for: Arachnophobia (Driders/spider people), Death (Unnamed drider), Killing, Blood (Kind of implied), Vore, and Cursing!
Tommy stared at the forest stretching out around him. Of course he had to explore deeper into the woods than was allowed and now him and his friends were in this situation. Trapped in a giant web made by something and no one around for miles.
"Tubbo, please stop yelling..." Ranboo grumbled, the half albino clearly ready to accept the fate that would inevitably befall the trio. His nihilism was sometimes a little too much to deal with.
Tubbo was yelling for help, he had been since Tommy fell into the web, and only increased in volume when he and Ranboo joined Tommy. "Shut up! Someone has to fucking hear us!"
"Yeah, or something. That's more likely!"
"Oh fuck you!"
"I'd... Hrm, you know what, never mind, I don't care."
"HELP!!"
Tommy sighed, scrunching his eyes shut. This was a horrible idea.
And then he felt the thread move.
Tommy's eyes flew open, heart leaping. "Tubbo! Tubbo something's coming!"
"Hey! We're stuck! Help us!"
"Guys, I'm not sure..."
Tommy joined in, yelling, pleading for help from whoever was moving the sticky thread of the spider's web. Both boys stopped, falling silent in horror as something beyond their imagination slowly came out of the foliage.
"That's not a person..." Ranboo whimpered, staring in terror at the half-human-half-spider creature looming over the trio.
"Huh, would have thought you were more... substantial from all that yelling." The creature stated, slowly and lazily. "Oh well, guess it's fine." The creature moved faster, obscenely long legs carrying it over the sticky threads to the trio as if it was nothing.
"woah, woah, woah! Can't we talk about this?!" Tommy tried, struggling against his bonds.
"Nope. Been without food for a week. Nothing to really talk-" The spider creature screeched suddenly as something dropped on its back. "You! Get off me! Stop!"
The trio watched as the spider creature struggled before falling over, limp save for a twitch of the leg.
And then the snickering began.
"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" The trio looked at their savior, hearts sinking as they realized it was another spider-person-thing. Smaller than the one whose web they were trapped in, but a second one no less. "Three little humans, all caught and with no way out? How sad." The spider-person hummed. It seemed to be floating in mid air as it dragged the much bigger spider person closer. "You know, I don't normally waste my time with people, but maybe you three could be fun. I mean, I did save you from certain death, so you kind of owe me, you know?" The giant spider creature convulsed, and the floating one reacted quickly to bite it in the neck.
Tommy watched as the light seemed to fade from the much larger one's eyes, it once again falling limp. He looked back up to the floating one. "You... You killed it."
The floating one smiled, removing his mouth from his prey. "Well duh! I eat these guys. Sometimes humans, but, I think I'll keep you guys around for a while."
"What?!" The trio practically yelled in unison. Tommy could only watch in horror as this new spider creature floated the rest of the way down, landing lightly on the web before it approached Tubbo, easily ripping his shorter friend from the web. "Tubbo!" Tommy's eyes teared up as he watched the spider creature dangle Tubbo over its mouth and drop him in, gulping loudly and snickering as it turned to Ranboo. "You son of a bitch! Let him out!" The creature ignored Tommy, stalking over to Ranboo.
"Hm, you're taller." It hummed, pulling his second friend from the web.
Ranboo was silent, looking to Tommy as he shook his head. He began to struggle when the creature opened its mouth, a deadly chasm just below his feet. "TOMMY!"
"RANBOO!" The duo called out to each other as Ranboo was dropped into the creatures mouth, where it seemingly rolled around- or worse, chewed- Tommy's last friend before swallowing him as well.
"You.. You sick FUCK!" Tommy hissed out, the creature approaching him. It knelt down next to him. God, even if this thing was small it was still probably hundreds of times larger than the trio. All three could probably fit in its hand with ease.
"What? You'll be fine. I'm not going to eat you yet. Little humans like you are too useful to me." It chuckled, pulling Tommy from the web as it did so. "Now, behave, you don't want me to change my mind!"
Tommy was unceremoniously thrown into the air, yelling as he fell, only to hear the sharp click of teeth snapping around him and plunging him into darkness. Tommy screamed and tried to fight back as he was thrown around by the slimy appendage that was this thing's tongue. He could feel the creature tilt its head back and swallow him down, his hand flying up and trying desperately to grab onto anything he could, made impossible by the slimy saliva. Tommy felt himself slide down the tight, muscular tube before falling into a more open space.
Right on Tubbo and Ranboo.
"Ow!"
"Oi! You two okay?!"
"For now we are. Right boss man?"
"Tommy just landed on my spine, we are inside a giant spider person, and no one knows we're gone. I wouldn't call this "okay" at all."
"Yep, he's fine."
Tommy sighed. They were alive, for now.
Dream smiled, happy his new pets were tucked away and safe. They probably thought they were in his actual stomach and not his storage stomach. Heh, oh well, they'd figure it out eventually. Right now he had to drag this giant pest that dared set up his web in Dream's territory someplace to store it. He made his way back to his drop line, smirking as he felt the trio stumble and jostle about inside him. Yeah, they'd be useful. And once they were done being useful he'd get rid of them for good.
#Trigger warning#tw vore#vore tw#tw arachnophobia#tw death#tw killing#tw arachnids#tw death mention#tw cursing#mcytg/t#mcyt g/t#Arachnophobia AU#tw blood#That on is kind of implied#tiny!tommy#tiny!Ranboo#tiny!Tubbo#Giant!Dream#drider!Dream
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Nihilism is so easy, which is why we need to kill it
(I initially published this here a couple weeks ago.)
So last night it dawned on me that, after over two years of being relatively symptom-free, my depression snuck back up on me and has taken over. It’s still pretty mild in comparison to other times I’ve been stuck in the hole, but after 24 months (and more) of mostly being good to go, I can tell that it’s here for a hot minute again.
How do I know? Well, it might be the fact that I spent more time sleeping during my recent vacation from work than I did just about anything else, and how it’s suddenly really hard for me to stay awake during work hours. I don’t really have an appetite, and in fact nausea hits me frequently. I don’t really have any emotional reactions to things outside of tears, even when tears aren’t super appropriate to the situation (like watching someone play Outer Wilds for the first time). And I’ve been consuming a lot of apocalyptic media, to which the only response, emotional or otherwise, I can really muster is “dude same.”
For a long time I was huge into absurdist philosophy, because it felt to my depressed brain like just the right balance between straight up denying that things are bad (and thus we should fix them, or at least try to do so) and full-blown nihilism. This gives absurdism a lot of credit; mostly it’s just a loose set of spicy existentialist ideas and shit that sounds good on a sticker, like “The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion.”
In the last couple years, while outside of my depressive state, I went back to Camus’ work and found a lot of almost full-on abusive shit in it. Not toward anyone specifically, but shit like “nobody and nothing will care if you’re gone, so live out of spite of them all” rubs me the wrong way in retrospect. The philosophy Camus puts out opens the door for living in a very self-destructive fashion; that in fact the good life is living without care for yourself or anyone/anything else. The way Camus describes and derides suicide especially is grim as fuck, and certainly I would never recommend The Myth of Sisyphus to anyone currently struggling with ideation. That “perfect balance” between denial and nihilism is really not that perfect at all, and in fact skews much more heavily towards the latter.
Neon Genesis Evangelion has been a big albatross around my neck in terms of the media products I’ve consumed in my life that I believe have influenced my depression hardcore. It sits in a similar conversational space to Camus’ work, in that it confronts nihilism and at once rejects and facilitates it. A lot of folks remark that Evangelion is pretty unique – or at least uncommon – in its accurate portrayal of depression, especially for mid-90s anime properties. The thing I notice always seems to be missing in these discussions is that along with that accurate portrayal comes a spot-on – to me, at least – depiction of what depression does to resist being treated. This is a disease that uses a person’s rational faculties to suggest that nobody else could possibly understand their pain, and therefore there’s no use in getting better or moving forward. Shinji Ikari is as self-centered as Hideaki Anno is as I am when it comes to confronting the truth: there are paths out of this hole, but nobody else can take that step out but us, and part of our illness is that refusal to do just that. Depression lies, it provides a cold comfort to the sufferer, that there is no existence other than the one where we are in pain and there is no way out, so pull the blanket up over our head and go back to sleep.
Watching Evangelion for the first time corresponded with the onset of one of the worst depressive spirals I’ve ever been in, and so, much like the time I got a stomach virus at the same time that I ate Arby’s curly fries, I kind of can’t associate Evangelion with anything else. No matter what else it might signify, no matter what other meaning there is to derive from it, for me Eva is the Bad Feeling Anime™. Which is why, naturally, I had to binge all four of the Evangelion theatrical releases upon the release of Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon A Time last month.
If Neon Genesis Evangelion and End of Evangelion are works produced by someone with untreated depression just fucking rawdogging existence, then the Eva movies are works produced by someone who has gone to therapy even just one fucking time. Whether that therapy is working or not is to be determined, but they have taken that step out of the hole and are able to believe that there is a possibility of living a depression-free life. The first 40 minutes or so of Evangelion 3.0+1.0 are perfect cinema to me. The world is destroyed but there is a way to bring it back. Restoration and existence is possible even when the surface of the planet might as well be the surface of the Moon. The only thing about this is, everyone has to be on board to help. Even though WILLE fired one of its special de-corefication devices into the ground to give the residents of Village 3 a chance at survival, the maintenance of this pocket ecosystem is actively their responsibility. There is no room or time for people who won’t actively contribute, won’t actively participate in making a better world from the ashes of the old.
There are a lot of essentialist claims and assumptions made by the film in this first act about how the body interacts with the social – the concept of disability itself just doesn’t seem to have made it into the ring of safety provided by Misato and the Wunder, which seems frankly wild to me, and women are almost singularly portrayed in traditionalist support roles while men are the doers and the fixers and the makers. I think it’s worth raising a skeptical eyebrow at this trad conservative “back to old ways” expression of the post-apocalypse wherever it comes up, just as it’s important to acknowledge where the movie pushes back on these themes, like when Toji (or possibly Kensuke) is telling Shinji that, despite all the hard work everyone is doing like farming and building, the village is far from self-sufficient and will likely always rely on provisions from the Wunder.
As idyllic as the setting is, it’s not the ideal. As Shinji emerges from his catatonia, Kensuke takes him around the village perimeter. It’s quiet, rural Japan as far as the eye can see, but everywhere there are contingencies; rationing means Kensuke can only catch one fish a week, all the entry points where flowing water comes into the radius of the de-corefication devices have to be checked for blockages because the water supply will run out. There is a looming possibility that the de-corefication machines could break or shut down at some point, and nobody knows what will happen when that happens. On the perimeter, lumbering, pilot-less and headless Eva units shuffle around; it is unknown whether they’re horrors endlessly biding their time or simply ghosts looking to reconnect to the ember of humanity on the other side of the wall. Survival is always an open question, and mutual aid is the expectation. Still: the apocalypse happened, and we’re still here. The question Village 3 answers is “what now?” We move on, we adapt.
Evangelion is still a work that does its level best to defy easy interpretation, but the modern version of the franchise has largely abandoned the nihilism that was at its core in the 90s version. It’s not just that Shinji no longer denies the world until the last possible second – it’s that he frequently actively reaches out and is frustrated by other people’s denials. He wants to connect, he wants to be social, but he’s also burdened with the idea that he’s only good to others if he’s useful, and he’s only useful if he pilots the Eva unit. This last movie separates him and what he is worth to others (and himself) from his agency in being an Eva pilot, finally. In doing so, he’s able to reconcile with nearly everyone in his life who he has harmed or who has hurt him, and create a world in which there is no Evangelion. While this ending is much more wishful thinking than one more grounded in the reality of the franchise – one that, say, focuses on the existence and possible flourishing of Village 3 and other settlements like it while keeping one eye on the precarious balancing act they’re all playing – it feels better than the ending of End of Eva, and even than the last two episodes of the original series.
I’m glad the nihilism in Evangelion is gone, for the most part. I’m glad that I didn’t spend roughly eight hours watching the Evamovies only to be met yet again with a message of “everything is pointless, fuck off and die.” Because I’ve been absorbing that sentiment a lot lately, from a lot of different sources, and it really just fuckin sucks to hear over and over again.
It is a truth we can’t easily ignore that the confluence of pandemic, climate change, authoritarian surge and capitalist decay has made shit miserable recently. But the spike in lamentations over the intractability of this mix of shit – the inevitability of our destruction, to put it in simpler terms – really is pissing me off. No one person is going to fix the world, that much is absolutely true, but if everyone just goes limp and decides to “123 not it” the apocalypse then everyone crying about how the world is fucked on Twitter will simply be adding to the opening bars of a self-fulfilling prophesy.
We can’t get in a mech to save the world but then, neither realistically could Shinji Ikari. What we can do looks a lot more like what’s being done in Village 3: people helping each other with limited resources wherever they can.
Last week, Hurricane Ida slammed into the Gulf Coast and churned there for hours – decimating Bayou communities in Louisiana and disrupting the supply chain extensively – before powering down and moving inland. Last night the powerful remnants of that storm tore through the Northeast, causing intense flooding. Areas not typically affected by hurricanes suddenly found themselves in a similar boat – pun not intended – to folks for whom hurricanes are simply a fact of life. There’s a once-in-a-millennium drought and heatwave ripping through the West Coast and hey – who can forget back in February when Oklahoma and Texas experienced -20 degree temperatures for several days in a row? All of this against the backdrop of a deadly and terrifying pandemic and worsening political climate. It’s genuinely scary! But there are things we can do.
First, if you’re in a weather disaster-prone area, get to know your local mutual aid organizations. Some of these groups might be official non-profits; one such group in the Louisiana area, for example, is Common Ground Relief. Check their social media accounts for updates on what to do and who needs help. If you’re not sure if there’s one in your area, check out groups like Mutual Aid Disaster Relief for that same information. Even if you’re not in a place that expects to see the immediate effects of climate change, you should still consider linking up with organizing groups in your area. Tenant unions, homeless organizations, safe injection sites and needle exchanges, immigrant rights groups, environmental activist orgs, reproductive health groups – all could use some help right now, in whatever capacity you might be able to provide it.
In none of these scenarios are we going to be the heroes of the story, and we shouldn’t view this kind of work in that way. But neither should we give into the nihilistic impulse to insist upon doing nothing, insist that inaction is the best course of action, and get back under the blankets for our final sleep. Kill that impulse in your head, and fuck, if you have to, simply just fucking wish for that better world. Then get out of bed and help make it happen.
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Prince of Time
Time is a cruel mistress. It is a cruel one, if only for the fact it is something who has a hold on everyone’s hearts, as well as their minds. Out of all of the Aspects, Time is one that no one can ever truly rid themselves of in one form of it or another. Like the air all around us, the starry night sky, forever expansive and looming over us, the life that breathes through the soil in which we walk upon; the same soil which holds all who have already walked this world, and which will eventually hold us as well. Time is something that is always around us, no matter where we go or who we are with. Its reach is far and seemingly endless; a shadow in which none of us can ever truly escape from. Even the animals who walk upon and share this planet with us, and who hold no clocks, no documents, no true way to tell or keep track of time - even they eventually are taken away and buried in the sandy dunes in which our spirits travel through.
Time is a cruel mistress because it promises us tomorrow, yet at the same time it does not. Nothing is promised by Time, it is merely us who convince ourselves that it does. We convince ourselves that there will be a tomorrow, and that every single one that comes, we will stand alongside it. The sun will rise again, yes, but not everyone will rise with it. Time gives just as much as it takes away, though sometimes it can feel as though all it does is take, and take, and take - giving what it has taken to those far less worthy of whoever has been wronged. It is a neutral force in our lives, uncaring and never bending in one direction or another. It is uncaring, and although it itself does not lean one way or another, it is the people who are touched by this force - this Aspect - that are left with the responsibility of what to do with it.
There will be those who manipulate it, changing it into a force that does bend, buckle, and break beneath their will, but there will also be those who mend it - who create and restore it in the places and people who lack it, bringing back what once was lost. Of course, there will be those who seek to protect it - to nurture it and keep its balance in the world it resides in. However, there are ultimately those who only wish to destroy it, for one reason or another. They see the wrongs that Time has brought upon not only themself, but everyone else in the world, and so they come to only view it as something to be hated and feared. Where there is fear, there is hatred. Where there is hatred, there is violence - destruction.
Enter the Prince of Time, someone who is often viewed as merely a stubborn mountain of a person. If there is one person you can most certainly not rely on to do anything in a timely manner, or even at all, it would be the Prince of Time. They are someone who finds themself always preferring to stay behind in adventures, much preferring to be indoors and perhaps even in bed while all of their friends and family urge them to come and join. Whenever given a task or assignment to do, the Prince may give a shrug or even give a promise that they will be sure to get it done. However, anyone who truly knows the Prince of Time knows that these promises rarely ever come to fruition. A Prince of Time is someone who most certainly goes at their own pace, though the exact reason as to why is something even the Prince themself rarely ever wishes to speak upon. For those who have known the Prince for years - specifically since they were a child - they will often find themselves wistfully looking back on the Prince’s life.
A long time ago, the Prince was someone who was just as active and heroic as their current friends and family. Some may even say that the Prince acted as though there was always fire under their feet, or maybe even in their soul. They always wanted to be the helper, the savior, the one who made the gloomy days brighter for everyone that they met. Once upon a time, the Prince wanted to make the world a better place for everyone. They believed they had all the time in the world to make things better for the people in their life. That belief of Time being something that lends itself to a child’s foolish dreams is something that would inevitably come crashing down on top of the Prince. For little did the young Prince realize that in a world so big, in a world that is always growing and evolving, it is something that doesn’t wait around for some random child with a whimsical, fantastical imagination. The world moves on, even when the Prince cannot keep up with it. The world does not stop spinning, the clock does not stop ticking, and eventually all the dreams the Prince once had slowly begin to wither away around them; much like the people in their life.
Indeed, loss is one of the biggest staples in their life. Loss, often showing itself in the form of some tragedy or another. For some Princes of Time, it will be their beloved childhood pet, while others may lose their home; physically, spiritually, or even metaphorically. For a large portion of them, however, their loss is that of another human - someone they looked up to with awe and wonder. Someone they may once have foolishly believed to be invincible to any harm, and the passage of time. It is this loss that the Prince begins to realize how often things are taken away from others, how many souls are lost in those blistering hot winds of Time. As a child, the Prince experienced a great loss and the grief that is soon to follow. When that grief did not so easily fade with time, the hands that once upheld them slowly began to withdraw back into the shadows until, ultimately, the Prince was left to deal with their feelings all on their own.
At least, in the eyes of the Prince, this is what happened. Whether this is true or not does depend on the specific Prince of Time, but many of them are prone to falling into these feelings of abandonment and betrayal by those around them. Their friends, their family, even people at their school or work. The grief never truly left the Prince, because it is something they lost the drive to resolve. Eventually, that dismantling of courage and energy caught up to the Prince, making them the person they are now. Passive, quiet, avoidant of any and all conflict, just a person who watches and observes rather than ever actually do anything. After all, no one was there for them when they needed help the most, so why should they help anyone in return? What’s the point in doing anything if Time is simply going to come and sweep everything away? Ever since that grand loss in their childhood, the Prince has been inadvertently avoiding - and destroying - the internal pieces of their Aspect more and more. Even now, if someone were to come along and offer care and support to the Prince, they’d most likely shove it away. They’ve taught themself that they are the only person who truly cares about them, and so will often try and destroy other people’s attempts to right what has been wrong until, inevitably, they leave the Prince. It is these small instances of destruction, these bouts of isolation and being trapped in their own thoughts, that the Prince will have their first taste of liberation from their Aspect.
The relationship between the Prince and their Aspect of Time is one of great stress and fluctuation. Nevertheless, the vast majority of these feelings are connected to negativity. A sense of betrayal, toleration, or downright fear and disgust. Not only has Time proven to the Prince that it does not care for them, but that it will take away whatever it wishes; leaving nothing but turmoil for the Prince themself in the process. If there is one thing the Prince grows to hate and perhaps even fear as they have grown older, it is that of change. More specifically, the onward progressive march that happens with the flow of time. Their childhood friends now becoming older and achieving their goals. A job, graduations, moving across the country, experiencing their own moments of loss and grief - everything keeps moving around the Prince, and they hate it. They hate it because, deep down, they are still that scared, lonely, confused and grieving child. Time has allowed everyone else to move forward, while the Prince has remained frozen to where they are for all of these years. All Time has done to them, and countless other people, is bring harm, stress, and suffering.
Time is what took away their friends from them, along with their role models and family. The ticking of the hands being a constant reminder that while the Prince is still here, those that truly matter to them are not. Living in such a frozen state of existence is what truly defines the life of a Prince, and it is often a self-inflicted issue; not that the Prince will ever admit to it. It is their own way of slowly, yet surely disconnecting themself from their Aspect - destroying it internally before ever even thinking of destroying it outwardly. As much as the regular concept of time is the one that moves everything forward, it is the Time-bound who feel that true heat to charge ahead of everyone else - clearing the path for those who may be lost or uncertain of what is to come tomorrow. Although the Prince of Time may once have felt that same heat, their blazing flames have slowly been reduced to smoldering coals and charred wood chips. Everyday that passes, a storm grows ever closer to the Prince; heavy with rain, and ready to allow its soft dam walls to shatter. The Prince does not attempt to protect their remaining fire from such a threat. No, they welcome its drowning.
Much like how the Prince drowns themself in their own misery, they not only actively destroy their own Time - dismantling it piece by piece with every passing day - but eventually their efforts do reach other people around them. Cynicism, nihilism, pessimism: all these things are that in which mark the Prince of Time. Always asking questions, but never for the right reasons. Why bother helping out one person, when so many others are still suffering? What’s the point in putting in so much effort into helping others, when you might not even reap the seeds you have sown? Why bother doing anything when none of it will matter in the end? For many people, this will most certainly push them away from the Prince; perhaps even coming to despise their overall depressive presence in the room. The Prince makes people question themselves and their motives, as well as just how big their impact truly is. They make others think and ponder on their own life, though not in the best way possible. Oftentimes, it leads to the destruction of other people’s sense of Time - that fight to keep doing what is right, to help those who are suffering, and to be the hero amongst the commoners. Do not think for a moment that the Prince does not notice this, either.
As passive as the Prince of Time may seem in their day-to-day life, their destruction of their Aspect is one that lends themself to slipping further and further into their opposite. The Aspect of Space, in this case, is one that promises the Prince a far better outlet for all that they experience and feel. That outlet is creativity. Rather than fight back and keep that flame alive - righting what has been wrong in the Prince’s life - the Aspect of Space has given them a far more passive option that is to the Prince’s liking. Art is something the Prince of Time picks up at one point in their misery, or another. It may depend on what exactly this art is from Prince to Prince, but ultimately it is something they find comfort in. Even if their paintings by brush, or sketches by pen, or murals by spray paint exude tidal waves of misery. Even if the words of their short stories, or the vocabulary of their poems are bleak and melancholy; it is this creativity that brings them momentary peace. Being able to express themselves through a far more intimate, personal level - visually putting down their feelings to help them better understand what is happening with them - this is one of the biggest ways the Prince learns to cope with their misery. To them, it may feel as though that Space - the cosmos itself - is all that truly cares for the Prince.
Yet as high up in the stars the Prince may find themself to be, little do they know that the further they drift into that grand void, the further they detach themself from their friends. No one can hear you scream in space, but one cannot hear anything in such a vast vacuum of nothingness. The social life of the Prince is extremely enigmatic, for as much as the Prince may try to distance themself from others, and although they consistently spout the most disheartening, antagonist, and hurtful things at times, they still find themself with people who crave their company. Pesky friends who text them everyday, or once every week, always asking how they are doing and if they wish to hangout. No matter how much the Prince may try and discourage such behavior, they always come back - always promise to “try again” another day. The Prince always scoffs at such ignorance, because who is to say there ever will be another day? Tomorrow is not promised. When the Prince sometimes hopes that their next one is not, that is often when tensions rise the most amidst their friend group.
When the Prince begins to slip away from those who care from them, it’s often when they truly start their true path of destruction. That drive to keep going has always been a burden on them - the urge to solve the problems presented to them. All they want - and all they have wanted - is to let it go; to smother it until it stops squirming. Something that has only brought them consistent misery, pain, and turmoil for most of their life - is it so wrong to want to snuff out this all-consuming fire? A fire which, much like a beast in the tall grass, waits patiently and quietly for the right moment to strike. When it does, the Prince knows - they know that someone they love will be badly hurt, or even worse. Personally, they can’t bear to allow for it to happen - or to be there for when it does.
Even as their friends beg them not to, clinging to the Prince and dampening the rags they wear, the Prince themself can only ever ask the same question that they always do: why? Why try to save someone who was doomed from the start? Why waste so much time and energy into trying to pull someone out from their darkest, deepest trenches, when the other person clearly wishes to fall? Why not let them go, and move on - just like everyone else in the Prince’s life has already done?
It is this moment, this culmination of grief, confusion, and senses of betrayal that the Prince’s role in the group starts to form. They are to challenge the true strength of everyone’s bonds; for it is the Prince who brings others to come screaming and crying in their face. They are to challenge the motives of others; for it is the Prince who causes those to doubt themselves, their convictions, and what their real goal is - what they really want out of their actions. They are one who is destroy Time, within themself and others; for it is the Prince who believes themself to be the most ultimate victim of their Aspect, as well as the savior to those not yet touched by it. They are an anti-hero to their very core, and it is a title - a crown - that they will proudly wear.
Heavy is the head that wears the crown; yet heavier is the soul that sits upon the throne. All of which is to say that, as much as the Prince’s friends may try their hardest to keep them from falling over the edge, it is almost inevitable that they will have to watch their friend fall into the darkness of their despair. Yet no matter how much anyone screams at one another, or how much the Prince may berate and bore into their friends with their words, or how many clocks and timelines have been smashed by the very hands of the Prince - one thing is for certain across all versions of the Prince of Time. They simply want everything to stop hurting, as well as prevent others from being hurt. By any means necessary, they will do it; even if a few hearts and bones need to be broken along the way.
While the Prince is far from ever being as protective as a Knight, or even a Page, that desire to protect those around them and themself is still buried inside of the Prince. Perhaps to them, it is the only part of their Aspect they will ever miss. As for the rest of it, all they see is merely a tragedy waiting to happen, in one way or another. The urge - the drive - to try and attempt the impossible, to charge into battles, to instigate conflicts in an attempt to fix what has been broken, it is all childish rubbish in the eyes of the Prince. Conflict gets people nowhere other than hurt, or six feet beneath the surface. They have seen the closest friendships be torn apart by their Aspect, they have seen the most resilient souls crumble into dust, and they have experienced an excruciating pain that still seathes and burns against their skin to this very day. However, what truly sparks this outrage - this final decision to go and rid the universe of Time itself - is one any keen observers have been anticipating.
When something begins to grow, when pressure starts to build, it is often unwise to try and bottle it all up; to act like the threat isn’t growing. Unfortunately for the Prince, and all of their friends, a moment would come and prove to the Prince that their Aspect is nothing but a danger. As much as they may accidentally torment their friends and build conflict in their group, they are still someone who deeply loves and cares for every last one of them. That is why they have decided to go forth and rid the world - eventually the universe - of their Aspect. However, it is also why one of the people who the Prince holds closest will end up experiencing their own pain, suffering, and loss - much akin to how the Prince encountered their own.
One can only conclude that amidst all the tension rising in the group, and the Prince not being quick enough to destroy their Aspect, it is their dearest friend who suffers because of it. By the hands of a fellow teammate, no less, will this pain be inflicted. It will be this event that will act as a catalyst for everything that is to come; the smallest domino eventually building up to knocking over an entire mountain. As their friend weeps in their arms; battered, afraid, and confused, it would be inevitable that this would not be the only instance of violence in the group. However, deep down, the Prince of Time knew that it would be up to them - the antihero - to come and liberate not only themself, but all of their friends, as well, of the horrors that is their Aspect. They are tired of playing the pacifist.
There are numerous ways in which a Prince of Time may go about with destroying their Aspect - namely as to what version of their Aspect they wish to target. Princes in general are often those not meant to be trifled with, but it is often those aligned with Aspects which hold far more literal forms that should be feared the most. Although the Time Aspect has indeed been primarily shown to be that fighting urge - that protagonist mindset of wanting to fix all that is wrong and lift up what is right - it still is something that involves the very passage of time itself.
Imagine a world where there are no clocks, calendars, or even a sky to tell where the shadows fall. Imagine a world where time does not exist. That is a world that the Prince of Time can most definitely bring into existence if they truly wished to do so. However, such a thing is often done in the most extreme cases of a Prince of Time lashing out against their Aspect; more specifically, when they have not yet learned that there is good to their Aspect, much like how there is good in their power of destruction. Oftentimes, this extreme level of Time destruction is due to the Prince wanting to take control back over their life before oblivion envelopes them. Indeed, to destroy all of literal Time would surely mean the end of the Prince themself, as they would surely be destroying themself in the process. These Princes of Time are those who tend to lean towards acts of martyrdom; always willing to throw themselves in harm's way if it means proving a point - proving they aren’t weak, or afraid.
However, there is also the destruction of Time in its more metaphysical way; specifically, that drive to fix what is wrong. Of course, the Prince of Time is one who has been on this path of destruction for countless years. By making others doubt themselves and question what their true intents are, they have been eroding the fighting spirits of others around them. Now that another person who they hold close has been harmed because of Time, though, the Prince sees that there is no point in sitting and waiting for it all to slowly rust and fall away. Instead, the Prince now actively seeks out any and all instances of this fighting spirit in order to wipe it out. All they see in this spirit is brutalistic, mindless savagery - a war waiting to break out amongst the group. If anyone is going to put a stop to it, they are someone who is more than happy to step in and rid the group of this tension.
While this may sound far more beneficial to the group than anything else, that is only true for a certain pocket of time. Although they will greatly benefit from being snapped back to their senses, dropping their weapons and releasing their tension between one another, it will never truly be enough for the Prince. As long as there is Time, there will always be the risk - the threat - of such an outbreak happening again. This anxiety of conflict in their own little bubble is ultimately what drives the Prince of Time to such extreme lengths, and it is why their creative spirit will inevitably take a far more dangerous spin on itself. Indeed, the Prince of Time will fall into the creative mindset of a Space-bound, and it is a mindset they are most definitely certain to use for their own means and movements.
It is not just their art that can become the weapon for the Prince of Time, though. Their words alone can be just enough to continue keeping their friends in check, and their hostility kept low. When a friend comes to them with a problem, the Prince will always be the one to shrug and question why they even care so much. A petty problem such as this won’t matter in a few years, so why even bother to waste all this energy on it? Destruction from the Prince of Time is one often hidden beneath an act or gesture of love, care, and kindness; if only with hints of cynicism. Whether these gestures and acts are genuine or all part of one large facade depends on one’s perception of the Prince, as well as the Prince themself. They may say that they are simply looking out for their friend’s mental health, and their overall wellbeing, but anyone observant enough will soon see that the Prince is one of the last people to ever be giving advice on how to cope with the struggles of life.
Inevitably, this would come to catch up with not only themself, but the friends affected by their words, as well. All of the people touched by their words would eventually find themselves not wanting to do anything, to fix anything wrong in their life. Ranging from no longer having the drive to work, to staying in a horrific, toxic relationship that will always do more damage than good; much like the Prince’s attempts at destroying their Aspect. Even the Prince themself will become a mere shell of a person if they do not start their constant attack on their Aspect. With that drive gone to do anything, all they would be left with is the awareness that they caused this; they caused all that is wrong to continue festering. Festering until, finally, it fully comes and consumes not only the Prince, but all of their friends, as well; a cluster of seashells swept and hidden away in the sandy oceans of time. Ultimately, these Princes who complete their conquest on destroying their Aspect will suffer the fate they feared the most; Time, the cruel mistress it is, claiming them and their friends, just like it did all those years ago, and just like it will for the next millenia to come.
Life is something all about choices, but it is also all about the consequences to those choices. Alongside the Mind-bound, Time-bound are those who most certainly are aware of this factor in our everyday lives. Our lives, our selves, are much like that of a tree - all starting from the same seed, but branching off further and further away from our own true self the longer we exist. Eventually comes the question: am I the original sprout of this tree, or am I merely another off-shoot, dead end branch on this goliath of a tree that is my life? Such thoughts are often overwhelming, perhaps even existential - and it is exactly why these are thoughts that the Prince of Time often struggles with. Not only does their own hatred and mistrust for their Aspect bog them down from being as active as they could be, but it is the fear that their actions ultimately will not matter, that they could merely be another doomed branch fated to be snipped away from the tree.
Due to having been gifted this foreboding sense of dread with everything they do, it is these Princes of Time that will be the ones to come out on top - the ones who will not end up forgotten and buried in the sands of time. Although these Princes have already started their self and outward destruction of their Aspect, there will forever be the gnawing feeling of fear and anxiety as to whether what they are doing is the correct course of action. An internal battle of wishing to be liberated from the oppressive force of their Aspect, but also not wanting to become another failure - another fallen soldier - amidst an ocean of bodies that share the same face. They are the ones who often are flippant with their approach to life. One day they may seem utterly hopeless and withdrawn from fixing anything, being that day’s hero. Other days, they find themself to be easily riled up and ready to protect and fight for what they believe to be right.
What is a Prince without their subjects - or their kingdom - if not a fool who believes themself to be of higher importance and power than others? For the friends of this type of Prince of Time, it is ultimately their own duty to nurture such capricious behavior, as well as encourage the latter half of their lifestyle. They are the ones who must drag the Prince away from total annihilation - to be their anchor in a world constantly moving, and seemingly largely uncaring to them. Although the Prince may fight back against such attempts, often in a way that pushes them further into destroying their Aspect, it’ll be their friends that will pull them away from such a damning habit. For as much as the Prince may try to destroy their Aspect, the awareness of how much their decisions affect the timeline is something that will always be in the back of their mind. More importantly, the way their actions change the timeline for not only themself, but their friends, as well.
As long as their friends keep this battle up, and kept their precious Prince away from the siren song of the stars, then eventually there would come a breakthrough. A breakthrough in which the Prince would come to realize that they do not wish to destroy their Aspect - at least not fully. No, they wish to simply know that their actions matter in the grander scheme of things, and that they also merely want to keep everyone together - and alive. They believed that if they destroyed Time in any sense of their Aspect, then they could preserve their bonds with all of their friends. People would no longer have to grow up and move away, get too busy with their own problems to ignore the Prince, or have anymore fights break out amongst one another that could lead to more people getting hurt; or worse. All they wanted was to protect everyone, but so far all of their efforts have only ever done the opposite - and the Prince of Time realizes that now.
However much it may seem that the Prince and their friends are out of the woods now, that is still not entirely true. This is a moment of weakness - of vulnerability - from the Prince; a gesture that asks or even begs for forgiveness from the people they hold so close. A cry for help into the sky, where they wait, panicked and afraid for what the response will be. This is the moment that will determine whether the Prince of Time will truly be pulled out from the tar pit that threatens to swallow up not only the Prince, but everyone else, as well, or if they will be left to drift further away into the faux cosmos that promises to hold them oh-so closely. The Prince of Time is aware that all actions have consequences, and those consequences are what change the course of a timeline. What matters most is that their friends understand this, as well - well enough so as to avoid casting everyone, and everything, they know into a timeline of failure and obscurity.
It should be of no surprise that if the Prince of Time were to be shown distrust, and shunned away from the group for the actions they committed, then it will be that final push they need to fully become a Prince who only destroys their Aspect. Which is to say, the Prince of Time will see to it that such a timeline will become Doomed - fated to be forgotten and erased amidst the other hundreds of thousands branches upon this tree. However, for the Princes of Time who are forgiven, or at least given a second chance to prove themself to be a better person, they are the ones who will become the Princes who not only learn how to destroy through their Aspect, but also how to destroy their Aspect for the benefit of others rather than only themselves.
For a Prince to destroy through their Aspect, they must first learn the ins and outs of how their Aspect even functions. All its flaws, its strengths, its forms, and more - it is this knowledge of their Aspect that will allow for them to use it for its greatest potential as a weapon for destruction. However, much like everything else in the Prince’s journey, it will be their friends who will have to guide and teach their royal friend through this field of knowledge. There will be many moments of frustration, of course, as the Prince will still struggle to fully accept that their Aspect is something that can bring good for quite a good chunk of their Aspectual recovery. At times, the Prince will even show signs of slipping back into old, self-destructive habits. As long as their friends maintain respect, patience, and kindness with the Prince, then such large hills will eventually appear as small, nearly insignificant molehills along their path.
Of course, along the way, the Prince will practice their powers of being able to destroy through their Aspect. It will be faulty and weak at first, if only due to how damaged their Aspect has become. Early stages of these powers will often come in the form of the Prince targeting smaller pieces. For instance, they could cause a small patch of land, or even an entire object of relatively small size to degrade far quicker - as though it were aging rapidly. Another way in which these fledgling powers may show themselves is the Prince being able to hone in on their own fighting spirit, and using it as a type of power up to their energy and/or attacks. After all, to destroy through Time is not only to destroy things via the passage and flow of it, but also to destroy through the urge to battle and conquer the evils of the word.
Starting from a mere apple quickly rotting away through the Prince’s touch, they would eventually be able to reach out further and further - destroying bigger and bigger structures around them. Plants wither and die around them, while large buildings and civilizations rise and crumble into themselves. Now, that is not the only way in which a Prince of Time may destroy through the more literal part of their Aspect. After all, the Prince of Time is well aware that their actions have consequences - the ability to create and destroy a timeline with so much as a single word or action. With such awareness of how their reality works, then the Prince of Time is one who could use this feature as something to be exploited for not only themself, but for all of their friends and teammates, as well.
By destroying through their Aspect, the Prince of Time holds a grand possibility in their powers. With every branching timeline, so comes all of the offshoots and alternative selves to not only the Prince, but their friends and teammates, as well. The Prince of Time alone could use their destructive powers as a means of creating a one-person army - the Alpha version leading all of their Doomed Selves to their proper and heroic destinies of battling to protect their friends. A Time-bound of any Class capable of using Timelines to their benefit are often the ones who have shown peak mastery in the art of their Aspect; and the Prince is no different. As long as those branches continue to split and splinter away from one another, there will always be enough soldiers to come and back up the Prince and their team. To have such a power is one that could greatly help the team win against a boss, but it is also a power that could help to destroy other problems in their session.
Aside from Space-bound capable of molding their Aspect, it is often unheard of for one person to be in two places at once. The Prince of Time is well aware that they cannot do such a thing, though it is not something that entirely is an obstacle for them. If the Prince needs a certain series of incidents and situations to happen, they will be certain that such things happen by not only their own hands, but the hundreds of ghostly ones that can reach across timelines - across the branches - making it so that the Prince is technically capable of being in multiple places at once; at least, in regards to Time. Oftentimes, this is a power that takes extensive planning, experience, and confidence in order to execute with little to no problems. However, even when things seem to go south for the Prince, they have one last power that has proven to be a handy tool for the Prince and, of course, anyone else who can find a need or use for it.
The final power of the Prince is one that has already been touched upon, if only in the basis of a Doomed Timeline. The power to destroy their Aspect is indeed a double-edged power, but it is one that will forever call to the Prince - much like the opposing Aspect of Space. This time around, however, they have learned from the selfish love and fatal protection of their Doomed selves - they have seen the standstill misery that comes from going overboard with their destruction, and it is something they do not wish to inflict upon anyone else any longer. For these Princes of Time, they have learned to use this power of destruction as a means of cheating the clock rather than merely destroying it altogether. By destroying the far more literal version of Time, they manage to essentially create a frozen bubble of time for everyone within it. This is often used as a means of buying those inside of it time to get their affairs in order, whether it be Frog Breeding, or creating the ultimate attack strategy for an upcoming battle.
As long as there is Time to destroy, and goals put under pressure by the weight of deadlines, then the Prince will happily be sure to deepen this pocket of timeless existence for as long as they deem fit. Of course, everything has its drawbacks; for the Prince of Time, too much destruction of their Aspect will most certainly begin to have a negative effect on the Prince themself, as well as the eb and flow of Time itself. Timelines may become at risk of clashing with one another, or even crashing - intersecting - with each other. After all, the Prince is still destroying Time as an entire thing in that moment, even if their teammates see it as something that only directly affects their timeline.
In a way, this continuous destruction of Time could also create a type of real life lag for everything in the world that they are in - or even a straight up glitch of reality entirely. When this pocket of empty Time ends, who is to say when, exactly, they will all end up? Will it be a few hours, days, perhaps even months? It is a power that not even the most skilled Princes of Time can ever truly perfect, if only because the consequences for it are often capricious and difficult to determine in that immediate moment. Nevertheless, the Prince has learned by now that no good comes with fretting over such things, nor is it fair to dump such existentialism of self and its relation with Time, and so they never bring such worries and troubles to their friends. Time can be a cruel mistress, but it is a mistress that the Prince wishes to be the only one stuck with its company. Too many tea parties with such a force can often lead to extensive amounts of fighting urges, and with the knowledge they have as to how to tame and destroy such a feeling, the Prince of Time is one who is ready and willing to make such a sacrifice of themself to their Aspect. For their friends - everything they do is for their friends.
As someone who started out merely wanting to forever wallow in their misery, the Prince of Time has made quite the extensive journey - whether they will admit it or not. They are a person who experienced loss at a young and vulnerable age, and for the longest time felt as though Time would only ever continue to take things away from them. Their friends, near and far, and family would eventually all seem to find their own ways to move on with life, seemingly having dropped any and all grief and remorse they once held. Everyone seemed to heal and continue on - the world continued to spin - except for the Prince. They felt frozen and trapped in their grief, pain, and suffering. So much so that they eventually convinced themself that it would be easier to not only turn towards destroying their Aspect - an action of ultimate self destruction - but that they would bring everyone else down with them. Rather than try to allow the healing touch of their friends to guide them to a better tomorrow, the Prince of Time convinced themself that so long as tomorrow never comes, things would be better.
Yet no matter how much the Prince tried to convince themself that this path of destruction was the correct one, an itching feeling always persisted in the back of their head. Is this truly the right thing - is there not another way, another method, to fix what has been broken? Inevitably, this itch would turn into something far more - far bigger - than they could eventually come to handle. That itch would be their Aspect fighting for its own life, but it would also be the own Prince knowing that to complete this path of destruction would mean locking away all of their friends, and themself, in an empty, doomed timeline. For the path they followed would only end in everyone they have ever known and loved being left as empty husks - husks in which felt no drive or desire to do anything, nevertheless complete an entire session that they all found themselves within. Even outside of sessions, though, the Prince of Time did prove themself to be someone of grand pessimism and/or cynicism. Poking holes into people and their own fighting spirits, deflating such a thing until it was all left empty and lifeless, the Princes of Time who stuck to this path would indeed succeed in bringing everyone down into their own tar pit of misery. Together they floated in misery, and together they drowned.
However, such a fate was not certain for the Prince of Time - and chances are they knew this. For the Princes who fought hard to break free from their prison of woe, it is a task that would most certainly never have been possible without the Prince accepting that this is not something they can do on their own. Years had gone by since they had ever taken the offer of help and comfort from others, as they had convinced themself that such a thing was no longer possible in the world they lived in; a world that continued to spin while they sank. They never wanted to attempt that climb back to the top, but instead only wished to bring the whole mountain, and all of its inhabitants down with them. It is only when the Prince realizes that for all this time that they have spent fighting and resisting, the real reason their friends ever wanted them to come back to them was because they needed the Prince. A kingdom is not a kingdom without their Prince, after all.
One of the biggest things the Prince would have to learn and accept about their reality was that just because the world had continued on moving, and their friends continued on living, didn’t mean they had abandoned the Prince. For it was their own belief that to stop being miserable would be to forget the people they lost, to disrespect what they gave to this world, that so greatly hindered the Prince’s chances of growing and developing their powers. The true powers of the Prince are that of destroying through their Aspect, rather than ridding themself and everyone else of it outright. Ultimately, the point of their powers for them to play that of a guardian - perhaps even a protector. Although they will never truly reach the exact level of protectiveness that Knights or Pages has, the Prince of Time is one who is meant to help maintain balance amidst not only their own group, but across the countless numbers of timelines, as well.
The futures of all who are associated with the Prince rests on their royal shoulders, and it is their utmost duty to make sure that everyone is ushered into the people they are meant to be. As much as the Prince of Time may care for their friends, and wish to protect them as best they can, there are unfortunately some plans made for those they love that will end in pain and suffering. It may seem unfair that the Prince be given such power, as well as these important roles of being the Judge, Jury, and, at times, the Executioner. However, it is these points in everyone's collective journey that will put the Prince and their relationship with their Aspect to the test. Will they be strong enough to put all of their trust into the flow of Time, or will they take matters into their own hands, altering the course in which they are sailing so as to avoid other people getting hurt?
Of course, not every Prince will be strong enough to allow these hard times to befall their loved ones. Although they may be able to get away with one or two changes to the timeline, it is important that they best be careful lest they wish to meet an unfortunate game over; a game over in which they and their friends will once again be left to be consumed and buried by the blizzarding sand of Time. It should come of no surprise that for the Princes of Time who not only give their trust to their Aspect, but decide to work alongside it, as well, are the ones who always end up making the furthest. As for the Prince of Time who finds themself within the Alpha Timeline, it is not entirely certain as to whether they are one of the most dedicated and loyal Princes of Time when it comes to their Aspect and all it stands for, or if their accomplishment is all due to luck; being at the right place, and the right time.
When there is injustice in the group, or even the slightest hint of conflict, the Prince of Time is one who will have to make sure that no improper fights break out. As much as they are capable of destroying the literal parts of their Aspect, they are still just as capable of destroying that fighting spirit that rests inside everyone. However, for the betterment of others, the team, and the timeline, sometimes the Prince must come forth and be the mediator that the people need. They are not only willing to do such a task, but will also lay down the facts of what would happen if such a fight were to break out. After all, the Prince of Time’s most important weapon is their very own words - something so simple, and yet something so capable of calming even the most capricious and riled up of the Prince’s group.
They are a peacemaker at the end of the day, much like many other Classpects spoken of before. However, it is merely how they go about bringing this peace that helps to make them stand out. Although they are most certainly not Space-bound, the Prince of Time is aware that words can help to make things better, but also make things far worse. When it comes to taking action, sometimes people are far too blinded by their own emotions to even see such gestures of love and kindness. Where the Prince struggled before with their own bleary eyed misery, pushing away others and becoming far more like that of an antagonist than the antihero they believed themself to be, it is a barbed wired path they wish no one else to have to travel through. The scars are not worth it, and the people one drags along do not deserve the scars left behind.
The Prince of Time realizes that now, and it is a pain that they will try their best to keep away from anyone else. Unfortunately, some things are inevitable, unavoidable, written in the stone and stars; if there is ever a tragic event that happens in the Prince’s presence, chances are it was something that was merely meant to be to begin with. Never think for a moment that it does not break the Prince’s heart just as much as anyone else's, however, for they are someone who must live knowing what is to come, and what they cannot change. Do not hold it against them, for they were merely doing what the stars and the cogs told them to do; even if it meant standing by and allowing harm to befall those they care for, or relationships to be tarnished.
The Prince of Time is one who brings peace, but they also someone who often finds themself to be at least one of three roles in situations of grand tension and conflict. They are the Judge, the one who knows and decides what action should be done to reprimand and discipline those who disrupted the peace. They are the Jury, the one who must observe all evidence presented to them and decide which party is innocent - the victim - and which is guilty - the criminal. Sometimes, they are the Executioner, the one who brings forth the appropriate and just punishment called forth by the people. No matter what role they play, when it comes to the Prince of Time, one who destroys through their drive to right what has been wronged, they are most certainly someone one does not wish to see at a hypothetical trial. Time is such a cruel mistress, and so, too, is the Prince of Time - if only when the need arises.
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Ranking Every SPN Midseason Premiere
15) 10.10 The Hunter Games. Wow, this one is real bad. Has not one, not two, but three subplots I either don’t care about or actively despise: Claire bonding with Cas (uh, he’s wearing her dad’s corpse), Rowena’s petty infighting with Crowley (bleh why), and Metatron smugly egging on Dean’s violence (why would he care?). This is deep in the slog of s10 episodes that go nowhere fast.
14) 13.10 Wayward Sisters. Is it clear yet that I really don’t like Claire episodes? Sam and Dean roasting lizards is the only real moment of fun here. I liked Kaia, so I hated that she gets used as Claire’s insta-friend/retconned love interest in order to immediately fridge her for the backdoor pilot… so that Claire, who was orphaned young, can understand loss, I guess? Pointless and unimaginative. I also resent the deeply, deeply directionless magic spear/Alt!Kaia subplot that eats up, like, four other episodes in s14-15 and accomplishes exactly nothing.
13) 3.09 Malleus Maleficarum. I like this episode for the insight we get into Ruby’s backstory, and the frank conversation that she and Dean have about demons and his impending Hell tour. But other than that, there isn’t too much to recommend it.
12) 8.10 Torn and Frayed. The next several episodes are all good, and are difficult to sort. In 8.10, Sam and Dean choose each other over Amelia and Benny, in all-or-none ultimatums. I truly enjoy how miserable they both seem to find themselves about this, about how their relationship has grown more and more isolating when tbh it needn’t be. Naomi’s control of Cas in this episode fleshes out the chilling implications we got in The Rapture: Heaven is best when its dark AF.
11) 6.12 Like A Virgin. Monsters, dragons, and Eve: the reveal of Purgatory kicks off a brand new chapter of the show’s mythology. But more importantly, Sam is fully back now! Watching him navigate this brave new world while no one will tell him anything is fascinating and more than a little sad.
10) 4.11 Family Remains. Actually frightening! I like it when the show does the ~it was just humans~ twist. And this episode has great commentary on Dean’s emotional state after his reveal about Hell last time. It’s a good MOTW.
9) 15.10 Nihilism. Dean’s bar mindscape. It’s no Sam mindscape, but it’s definitely the most interesting thing that’s been done with Dean and possession. It’s kinda fascinating that Dean’s uncomplicated happy place exists in an underdog Americana limbo without either Cas or Sam. Also gives us, at last, a good take on Alt!Michael’s motivations—he’s hunting down God. Loses points because the idea of managing to lock Michael in Dean’s mind for any length of time is still extremely unlikely.
8) 1.11 Scarecrow. Meg’s iconic introduction, Dean and Sam’s first breakup; emotional clashing over Winchester family dynamics: what’s not to love?
7) 12.09 First Blood. We’ve got Sam and Dean coping with prison very differently, then using their deaths to escape, and an action sequence through the woods: it’s just real fun. Cas breaks their deal with Billie, which ends up having, uh, no consequences whatsoever. It’s a strong kickoff to a regrettably weak second half of s12.
6) 7.11 Adventures in Babysitting. A quiet, emotional breath after Bobby’s death: Sam and Dean are deep, deep in terrible misery. The potent psychological suffering of season 7 is a delight, and 7.11 doesn’t shy away from it. Plus, it’s got Sam volunteering to get bit in the neck, and a rare example of a Plucky Teen (tm) done right.
5) 15.09 The Trap. This is just a worse 11.10. But 11.10 is amazing, so that’s still a compliment: Chuck tries both torture and the promise of various bleak futures to get Sam to cave. Even if the various futures aren’t staged that well, there is so much stuff here that’s ripe for analysis: especially on the broader stage of s15, this episode is plain interesting.
4) 5.11 Sam, Interrupted. Sam and Dean in a psych ward! They’re dealing with the extreme stress and grief of season 5, and they’re doing it badly—this episode provides a great way for their respective coping mechanisms to be forcefully stripped away. In a delightful microcosm of the show, Sam confesses his anger and gets consequently wrestled down and tied down to a cot.
3) 2.10 Hunted. Gordon Walker, whose old-fashioned absolutism is only matched by his competence, is one of the most memorable early seasons antagonists, and for good reason. We also get Ava, the queen of season 2, who has taken it upon herself to warn Sam and save his life. Then Sam and Dean using code words to disarm Gordon’s trap, and the fallout from John’s final words: quality television.
2) 9.10 Road Trip. Oh my god, what a horror show. This is an exemplary episode. Just incredible. Kinda unfair that it has to compete with 11.10, because it would take the gold by a mile in most other matchups. It’s got a fascinating character study of Gadreel, which also serves to inject interest into the s9 angel conflict; it’s the violent, hypocritical lengths to which Dean is willing to go; it’s got needles in Sam’s brain and a nauseating, horrific picture of possession; it’s got That Bridge Scene. The payoff for 9.01 begins to come due, in spades.
1) 11.10 Devil in the Details. Season 11 gets two D-tier ranks and two S-tier ranks; this is the duality of man. Do I even have to explain why I love 11.10 so much? It’s Sam and Lucifer in a room in Hell for an entire episode, nuff said. It gets better with every rewatch—there are so many great tiny moments, so much history. Lucifer’s combination salespitch/dressing-down is threatening and fascinating and mostly accurate; Sam’s rigid terror and courage and heartbreak and anger and resignation and determination are intoxicating. I want to watch them talk in a room forever.
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more like the hypocratic oath
Fuck the Hippocratic Oath.
I've always loved to memorize things from a young age. I'm 26, and I still see the same doctor that saw my mother 10 years before my birth. So I've spent a LOT of time in her waiting room, unchanged for decades. She has a weird obsession with lighthouses. Also, a framed text of the Hippocratic Oath on the wall.
Being the only thing to read in the room, over the years, I kind of accidentally memorized it. It's shorter than most people think.
It's never really been useful. Whenever it would come up in conversation I'd sometimes say "did you know that 'First do no harm' isn't actually in the Oath?" but most people didn't believe me. I didn't really care. It never came up, and it was never really important.
But this week alone I've read 6 references to the Oath in the news, had 3 conversations about it, and had to nope out of countless Reddit threads, all along these same lines:
"Why can't we lower the priority of anti-vaxxers who need to be in the ICU?" The Hippocratic Oath, of course! First, do no harm. Second, triage according to whoever needs the most care the most urgently. Third, forget the first two because neither of those things, not even in sentiment, are in the Oath.
There's a LOT of people who seem to have been indoctrinated into following a dogma they don't even know the contents of. They hear "Hippocratic Oath" and instantly think "First, do no harm" and then stop there. Because we think we know the gist. "Don't wield your power of being a doctor to become an evil monster." You should be right, but you're not.
If we're going to argue medical ethics, let's see what this amazing oath is really all about.
It starts out pretty normal. Swearing to Apollo. "[A]nd Asclepius, by Hygieia, by Panacea, and by all the gods and goddesses". Normal stuff. Oh, your doctor doesn't believe in Apollo? Breaking the Oath.
But then we get to the good stuff. Y'know what's so important that the Hippocratic Oath decided to address it directly and by name? Abortion. As in, "I will not give to a woman a pessary to cause abortion". Forget what a pessary is, it's an ancient medical device. So, the entire profession of performing abortions? Breaking the Oath.
But hey, abortion's a touchy subject. What about something as neutral as kidney stones? Well, "I will not use the knife, not even, verily, on sufferers from [kidney]stone[s]". Weird how if I were to walk into an ER with a kidney stone the size of a kidney bean they'd cut it out. With a knife. Verily. Breaking the Oath.
It's not all bad or oddly specific. The last bit basically says "If I walk into your house, I won't abuse you, even if you're a slave." How kind! And lastly, patient confidentiality. The end.
...Except, the Oath was rewritten in 1964. It cut out the abortion and kidney stone bits and comes in the form of modern English. Since it's not too long and wordy like the original, here's the full text of the "modern" Hippocratic Oath: (I'm cutting the first and last lines that just say 'here's the oath' and 'that was the oath', emphasis is mine to talk about after.)
"I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.
"I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.
"I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug.
"I will not be ashamed to say "I know not", nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.
"I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.
"I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for the sick.
"I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.
"I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm."
Let's work backwards. The last line I emphasized because I think it comes closest to being a good argument for why anti-vaxxers should be allowed to clog up our ICUs. Doctors have "special obligations" (which isn't specific enough for me) to all humans, even the "infirm". At a glance it seems like this says "Doctors have to help people who are well as well as those who are ill" but "sound of mind" really jumped out at me. To me, it is not of sound mind to be anti-vaccine. If "infirm" is the opposite of "sound of mind", then anti-vaxxers are entitled, like all humans, to whatever "special obligations" the doctors have. Like I said, I don't find that phrase specific enough for me to accept this as an argument, but it does come close. If we define "special obligations" as "the obligation to provide medical care", then yes, put all anti-vax Covid patients in the ICU. But "special obligations" could just as well mean "the obligation to put the needs of the many over the needs of the few", which is supported by the statement's previous allusion to being a member of society, in which case, kick those fuckers out on the street.
The second point I highlighted just because this was written by and for America, and somehow they remain the only developed nation where one's "economic stability" is absolutely never taken into consideration.
Finally, my big closer. Life and death. "If I manage to save a life, great, cool. But also sometimes I'm allowed to kill people. No, I will not elaborate".
But it has another meaning: "As a doctor, sometimes I will necessarily have to kill people." This is simply one of those times. I'm serious. If not now, when?
I highlighted the very first line because I think it sets the tone for the entire Oath, and because I believe that actively choosing to treat anti-vaxxers instead of people with "lesser" problems, that choosing to allocate ICUs to people who spit on your science is violating the directive to follow the "hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk". I can't imagine a 1940s TB nurse being teleported to present day, informed about Covid, taking a look at our hospitals and saying "well done".
It's a good thing it doesn't actually say "do no harm", because the Oath itself has violated that directive. As Ontario's ICUs continue to rise, doctors continue to harm society because they think triage is part of the Oath. It's not. Stop pretending it's anything more than a contract you sign when you work at fuckin McDonalds and you promise not to make dumb Tik Toks at work. Every job has its moral standards. Doctors have one of the most ethically and morally difficult jobs on the planet, yet we treat medical ethics as a settled matter.
The original was written in 275AD. It was rewritten 60 years ago. Maybe let's not wait another millennium to fix this glaring problem that isn't going to go away. In the meantime, let's try and work from actual facts and not what we think we know. A tall order these days unfortunately.
Stay Greater, Flamingos.
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Things Dobson mocks because he is too ignorant...
One “talent” Dobson seems to have, is the ability to alienate a lot of people through his opinions. And while he claims to be proud of that talent because he believes those he alienates are just assholes and racists who disagree with him CAUSE he attacks their abhorrent worldviews, the reality is much simpler; On average, people just don’t like him cause Dobson has no idea what he is talking about, which won’t however stop him from mocking the mere existence of certain things/interests and the people enjoying them. And those people tend not to be racists who want to see non-white people go extinct, but simply nerds and enthusiasts who like to enjoy their hobbies without the input of someone who won’t get over how he was bullied as a nerd back in school, but at the same time will bully you for being “nerdier”.
I could go into more detail how I mean that by analyzing a lot of his anime related SYAC strips as well as his soapbox strips on comic culture in a row. However, for the sake of “simplicity” I just like to go over one of his oldest strips, published around 2011. Back when Dobson was portraying himself still as a human. This strip alone will show how even a decade back, Dobson could just be an asshole to any “nerd” who dared to be into stuff he wasn’t, how he could manage to piss off many people all in one going AND be unfunny.
Now the first thing I want to put out is that I do not even think that Dobson’s primary intention with this strip was to mock others and their interests. See, one thing about So you are a cartoonist especially in its early days was, that it was in a way Dobson’s attempt to make himself look likeable in the eyes of others. He portrayed himself just as an Average Joe, wanting to make comics. This strip itself was even part of a series of strips I like to call “Things Dobson likes/dislikes”, which really were just him in each panel pointing at something he is into or not.
And honestly, part of me does not mind it. It is just Dobson’s attempt to show others how “quirky” or contrarian he is. The problem really steams more from the following two facts: a) It is not really a cartoon or comic if you think about it, because there isn’t a joke, punchline or story attached to them, just Dobson showing off what kind of person he is and b) that his “things I do not understand” comic is really mean spirited compared to the others if you look just a bit deeper into it.
Right from the beginning the strip is just indicative that this will be more mean spirited than Dobson will later like to claim it was. Otherwise he would not feel the need to say “chillax” as a sort of semi defense mechanism, cause if he really intended to make his grievances heard through “good fun” he would not need to say that. So from the gate we can assume its snarkier and more hurtful than it needs to be. So lets get through the things he does not understand, shall we?
Sports: I will admit that I am not really into sports myself, neither as a fan or someone participating in it competitively. I go to the gym however in order to feel good about myself and do something for my health instead of going every Friday to McDonalds. In addition, as long as you do not go overboard with being a fan or participating in it, I understand how sport can unite people (see events like the Olympics and Soccer worldcups) , and while I am baffled upon the fact that the salary of many people in sports (particularly soccer and football) are ridiculous high in addition to money they make with advertisement deals etc. I have respect for them. Respect for how they can stick to a hard training schedule, can take injuries, will do stuff for charity etc. Furthermore, unlike Dobson, I do not believe people who are into sports are dumb. Yes, I know the stereotype about college footballers and sports who only graduated because of their sports activities and are otherwise “meatheads”, but that stereotype does not apply to everything in reality, Dobson. Ever heard of NFL lineman Duvernay-Tardif, who also has a degree as a surgeon? Granted, he made that title only in 2018, seven years after the comic was made, so look a bit further and see what we find… Oh, look: Myron Rolle, college football player and later members of the Tennessee Titans and Pittsburgh Steelers around 2010/12: Has a bachelor degree in exercise science and in 2008 studied for a Master of science for medical anthropology in the UK.
Ron Mix, famous AFL and NFL football player forever immortalized in the Hall of Fame has a Juris Doctor Degree and after his work as a sports became an attorney.
And that are just three examples googled up in relation to American football. Other famous sports worldwide have degrees in medical and sports related sciences. Heck, one of Europe’s most famous boxer’s in the 2000s, Vitali Klitschko, not only has a doctors degree in sports, he is nowadays head of the governing party of Ukraine, following the independence of the country in 2014.
So stop wiggling your three sets of eyebrows and cease your smug grin and shove that periodic table up your ass, Dobson. I bet you yourself don’t even fucking know the chemical symbol for silver or titanium you Agonizing Twat who never got over the fact some popular kids in school bullied him.
Final Fantasy: I doubt Dobson ever even tried to play Final Fantasy or ANY JRPG, honestly. Heck, not only does Cloud look pretty wrong (anime hair seems to be another thing Dobson can not draw) but frankly, the statement of Cloud being an emo is false and is based on misinterpretation. Bear with me for a bit; Final Fantasy 7 is in my opinion a good game and it had a major impact on the series and the perception of JRPGs in the west. However, I do also believe that many people overhyped its quality over the years. Including SquareEnix themselves, who particularly around 2005 released all sorts of tie in and sequel games, including also the movie “Advent Children”. Or as I like to call those things, Tetsuya Nomura’s wankfest, because now all of sudden everything is related to some guy called Genesis, we have even more characters to supposedly care about than we already got through the original game, happy end override happens almost on every corner and “goth” aesthetics are everywhere. And Cloud himself became an embodiment of that emo/loner stereotype in anime and manga around that time, despite never having been like that in the original game if you ask me. Yes, Cloud in the original game went through a lot of emotional trauma and he was not like some happy go lucky laid back shonen manga protagonist. But he also didn’t come off as a pretentious fucktard who never showed emotions and shut himself off from his friends and allies. He was more of a determined person who still cared for others and wanted to stop Sephirot so no one suffered like he did. His most “depressing” moment was when Sephirot revealed his false memories, making Cloud question his own existence as an independent being to the point he was broken enough to hand the Meteor sphere to Sephirot, but that was about it. But hey, “emos” sell better, so SquareEnix tried to sell that aesthetics and others were just so dumb and further misinterpreted it as emoness being Cloud’s main character trait, when in reality freaking Squall Leonhard in his original game was worse than Cloud in comparison.
I also find the implication of Dobson, that Final Fantasy is pretentious in that panel funny as fuck. Cause Final Fantasy 13s’ pretty dumb story and wankery of clicheed anime tropes not withstanding, the average Final Fantasy game has a straightforward fantasy plot of good guys vs bad guys, with some twists and anime tropes thrown into the mix. The most pretentious guys in those games really are just the bad guys when they talk on average about how the world is suffering and misery, and even that is just straightforward nihilism to justify why they want to destroy everything. It is in fact so straightforward, most little kids will get it particularly in the first 6 games of the series, which are just set in more “classic” fantasy worlds to begin with. I am not saying the Final Fantasy franchise as a whole is flawless (I really am not a fan of 13 and its sequels, but if you like it, you do your thing) but you do not need a thesaurus to get why people enjoy it or individual games from it. So stop hating on an entire game series, which btw has actually some pretty awesome female characters in protagonistic roles in it too.
Twilight: Both an example of Dobson’s hypocricy and idiocy. Idiocy cause frankly, what is hard to understand why people liked the books? Twilight (in my opinion) was just a professionally published self insert fanfiction, in which Bella/the reader fell in love with the local bad boy who just happened to also be a vampire. Sure, a vampire in name only (seriously, if you asked me, the Cullens could be replaced with a lot of other fantasy creatures and it would barely affect anything), but that is beside the point. Shameless romance stories about someone falling in love with the bad boy who deep down has a heart of gold and just needs someone to fix them, are nothing new. So I was not surprised that people, particularly teenaged girls and other women, enjoyed it. It was the romance literature equivalent to fast food which just happened to explode in popularity because Young adult novels were a simultaneous hit and something needed to fill the void after Harry Potter. I read the first book myself and I thought nothing in particularly wrong with it, aside of the fact I thought the book itself was plotwise kinda dull. But that was not why people bought it, they wanted Bella getting together with the bad boy. The fact Dobson did not understand on what the popularity was build up on, is just an example for how Dobson does not even in theory understand how stories work and what it is on a pure technical level that makes them interesting and sell worthy to others.
As for the hypocritical aspect, that comes up nowadays when Dobson claims he feels bad for mocking Twilight all those years ago and how people were bad for making fun of it and Stephenie Meyer. That those who did it were like women hating assholes and still are if they do not apologize. Cause frankly, I feel a majority of people “apologizing” are just dishonest with themselves now. Apologizing primarily because in the eyes of some other people they look up to, if they do not they will be pariahs. Especially when extend of their initial childish disdain for Twilight becomes clear. I e.g. do not hate Lindsay Ellis aka the former Nostalgia Chick, but the fact she made a big apology video on Meyer was laughable when you see how she “stood” to her opinion back in the day to the point she wrote a novel to mock the kind of story Twilight did. Sure, she admitted to a lot of her own faults back in the day so there was also some self reflection to it and I respect that. But I think in a way this was also a tactic to just appease some other people and it does not take away that initially she had those thoughts about Twilight. And frankly, Twilight is problematic in a way.
Again, I read the first book and I did not consider it the worst thing in the world, just kinda dull for my taste. However, having read on a lot of things that happen in the book series itself, it is clear that Bella and Edward are some pretty horrid and selfish characters who barely get called out or face consequences for terrible actions. Take also into account the pacing of the story and you get on average a book series that deserved a certain amount of criticism from a technical point of view and Meyer’s at least being questioned about some of her decisions in the writing process. It did however not deserve book burnings or people mocking and harassing fans and the author, the former being mocked by Dobson here funnily enough.
Transformers: And what is it you find weird about people caring for cars? This is not even me being a cars fan here or something, I just ask because even that “explanation” is no explanation at all. He is just saying “I don’t care for X because I also do not care much for Y”. The correlation between the two is missing.
As for why people care about those two things Dobson, perhaps it is for the following:
Cars because people like the aesthetics, the technics, like to build stuff or get a rush by driving them. Transformers, because people just like action as well as the lore to the franchise and think giant robots turning into vehicles is cool, as long as Michael Bay is not involved in creating a story.
Furries: As with cars, likely aesthetics. Anthropomorphic animals have been part of our culture even long before cartoons (just look at fables, fairy tales and legends all across the world involving animals) so I assume there is even something more subconsciously involved with it. And frankly, I like furries myself. Some of them are way better artists than Dobson could ever be. That said, I do as an individual draw a line at furries that harass other people and show creators, hurt animals or are combining their interests with some really weird sex fetishes (two words: diaper fur). Which I guess do many other people cause there is a healthy amount of furries and non furries who have standards. The thing is just Dobson seems to think all furries are the same. Not to forget that for a long time he did everything denying he was interested in furries, citing his college as a reason for it cause people there installed a hatred for furries into him. A wonder then he would even enjoy Looney Tunes anymore. And honestly, himof all people mocking people for having a “sick” fetish? I am sorry Dobson, but compared to the kind of inflation you drew, I would say the average furry (as in someone who just draws two adult fursonas making out with each other under consent) is less “disturbing” than you. Someone who did not just inflate the female, at times underaged victims, but also made them pop/killed them.
DnD: I wish I had the comment Dobson posted on deviantart under the comic, as in it he digged himself even deeper with every panel and the explanations he gave. Just to show I am not pulling it out of my ass when I say for DnD one of the main reasons he hated it was that he thought nerds made the fantasy genre even nerdier by adding math to it.
Oh no. The fact people have to add numbers from a couple of dices together is too high of a math concept for Dobson. So those people must have absolutely no lives and are all just fat, bald and with acne.
Seriously though, fuck off. I am not into table top gaming, but whoever is, they shall just have fun. And stop body shaming nerds with the way you draw the DnD player here (and in that other infamous DnD comic he did), especially when you yourself look like a shaved egg in real life. Heck, did you know of all people Vin Diesel enjoys DnD?
Just let the people enjoy their adventure campaigns and come together once in a while instead of being shut offs like you, whose only experience with an interactive fantasy story involves playing Skyrim at 10 fps.
And yes, I am aware that Dobson has changed his opinions on DnD now thanks to some podcast. But based on his record, I feel that Dobson only did join it because it is now the cool thing to care on average about DnD as nerd. In addition he also did not own up to his past “mistake” till people just called him out on his bullshit often enough.
Klingons: Okay, I am not much of a Trekkie myself, but again, I get that people just like the aesthetics of them and the story crafted around Klingon culture within the franchise. So, just let them have fun with it. What is even the “joke” here? That people enjoy it despite it “just” being black Asian barbaric samurai in space, which is a very simplistic, in my opinion even outright racist description based on the choice of words here? Frankly, I am glad he did not just also add a racist Japanese accent to the guy here.
So there you have it: Things Dobson does not understand and essentially mocks for existing. And don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with Dobson not “getting” those things. Everyone has their own tastes, likes and dislikes as well as reasons why they are into it or not. I e.g. understand that people enjoy Bob’s Burger, but I myself really do not like the show much, because most characters come off as annoying to me in terms of personality and quirks. That said, I understand the visual appeal to it, if you like it that is fine and if you ass why I don’t like it I will give an explanation to it. What I will not do is make a comic mocking the existence of it, imply that my disinterest is correlated to me thinking there is also something inherently wrong with you if you enjoy it and build my disinterest on none existing issues with the thing in question.
Dobson however seems to have done that quite a couple of times and combined with his self righteous nature, it becomes kinda obvious why people began hating his stuff to the point that almost all of 4chan and tumblr developed a stern disdain for him.
#adobsonsartwork#adobsonartwork#syac#andrew dobson#twilight#final fantasy 7#final fantasy#ff7#sports#western comics#dobson being a prick to nerds#so you are a cartoonist
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Made a tier list of FNaF media!!! Not counting the activity book or the security survival log because those don’t really add anything, they’re just neat activities or summaries of game info
I explained the choices under the cut, equal parts personal bias and objective opinion, so if you think differently then hey, good on ya!
Going down to up XD
F
The Silver Eyes Graphic Novel: Do I even need to explain this one? Rushed art with countless mistakes, horrid coloring, samey designs, the important scenes come off as bland and even goofy instead of impactful. It’s clear Pinky wasn’t used to drawing humans, the colorist had no idea what they were doing, and no one on the team made a graphic novel before. It’s laughable how bad this was XD
E
The Fourth Closet: Does anyone really know what happened at the end? I... really don’t like what they did with Charlie in this one. I don’t like how William was able to get out of his Springtrap- it was SUPPOSED to trap him, and yet he just... is out of it... I think the whole thing with Baby being like this hot clown girl instead of what she is in Sister Location is very... ... it exists... Tbh I respect the bold direction it took, but I honestly felt it was too much of a stretch and just didn’t work.
D
FNaF AR, Special Delivery: Not bad! The character models and voice acting is where the game shines most. Other than that, there isn’t really much substantial to the game other than some lore with Vanny/Ness and Luis. The gameplay can get frustrating sometimes(I cant collect remnant, read my mail, or even work on my own animatronics without DING DONG SOMEONES HERE every 5 seconds), and all you do is spin in a circle until you get glitchy, look away if they get glitchy, or zap them when they run at you. Some people probably love this game and good on them for that, but I find myself not touching it for weeks at a time.
Freddy In Space 2: GREAT game for charity, great art, great music! ... That’s all it has going for it, though. It was clear that this was a quickly made game designed to be beaten in one sitting, and it did exactly what it needed to do! Other than being amazing how it was for charity, the game doesn’t have that much going for it(except introducing Lolzhax aka BEST ROBO), so overall not bad but also did almost nothing outside of being for the Charity Livestream XD
Fazbear Frights, Into The Pit: Again, not bad! A nice collection of short stories, almost like goofy campfire horror you’d tell to kids... like goosebumps! I felt each story was REALLY lacking in some areas, but I liked the general idea they were going for. That being said, they’re moreso neat scary stories with the name FNaF attached than anything else(except maybe the first of the three). It hints that they have an overarching plot that will be covered in future books, but as of right now, I feel no one’s missing out by not reading them.
C
FNaF 3: A satisfying end to the original trilogy story! Purple Guy gets justice, everything gets tied together with a neat bow, and the first arc in the series comes to an end. Also Springtrap, aka my favorite. This game is riddled with neat 8-bit minigames and bits of lore, but the gameplay itself is where I find it not as good as the S A and B tiers. The new setup with the system reboots are def really interesting, but other than that, each night is just... the same thing but harder. Most other games introduce different characters on different difficulties per night, but since Springtrap is the only deadly one, it’s just... him more aggressive each night and systems failing more often. Makes the gameplay pretty repetitive and frustrating after Night 3 or so.
FNaF 4: The beginning of what I like to call the Afton saga(4, SL, FFPS, UCN)! This is when the lore began to get REALLY good... and also really confusing. Props for it taking such a bold direction by taking place in a child’s bedroom instead of in an office with cameras, its a neat change of pace! That being said, the gameplay can get frustrating and there’s a high learning curve for needing to listen to each sound the anmatronics make. Also lore wise... there really isn’t much! Just mainly focuses on what happened to this poor kid. Also the box still being a loose end... yeah.
The Twisted Ones: I enjoyed this one! It had a very interesting direction that kinda kept me guessing on what was going on, and this is when Scott really started nailing in the foreshadowing for the reveal in TFC. The Twisted animatronics are SO cool, and the introduction of those little alteration chips provided new context to games like 4 and SL! That being said, I don’t remember it being... that memorable? I also didn’t like how Charlie’s and John’s relationship was... so awkward... It was neat, but honestly nothing to really go crazy over, in my opinion.
B
The Silver Eyes: Honestly, I adored this book when I read it back in 2016, before Sister Location happened. At the time I wasn’t trying to connect it to any lore, so it was really great just to see a sort of retelling of the FNaF story. A lot of people complained about how long it was... I might agree if I reread it but tbh it never bothered me before. It was delightfully creepy, yet had a simple plot and wasn’t NEARLY as out there as TTO and TFC. Especially TFC. I felt this book didnt need 2 sequels and would’ve been just fine on its own, but whatcha gonna do. Carlton is forever my fav, and it’s the first time we really learn about Henry AND it was the first time we got a name for our Purple Guy: William Afton!
Sister Location: I like this one for just how bold of a game it was. I’m also including SL’s Custom Night wrapped into this package. Jam packed with lore, our first (main) game with VOICE ACTING, and honestly the humor has no right being as good as it is. I love how this not only expanded on the crying child from 4′s story, but also gives us so much Elizabeth and Michael content. The gameplay has a lot of unbalanced features and feels a little too over the place at times, but I appreciate where it was going with it!
FNaF World: ... This one is pure personal bias. A lot of people don’t like it. I adore it. Honestly I love the cute overworld, I love beating up enemies as my favorite animatronics, I love the horror, nihilism, and lore shoved into this game alongside SO MUCH humor. Update 2 was nothing short of an absolute delight and... wait, no!!! FNaF World had our first voice acting!!! So many endings and nods to other games Scott’s made, a cool scene with Desk Man/Henry and Baby, just... muah. Good content. Also Scott 57 <3
A
Ultimate Custom Night: Name a better way to end the Afton Saga, I’ll wait. It’s so obvious how much time, thought, and care went into this one. I love how the game rewards you with funny cutscenes the higher scores you get, and I just! So much voice acting! I love how each preset- no, each character has their own moves so every time you do a certain mode, you need to learn to manage them all and get a good strategy. I like how it’s way more strategy and skill than the RNG that many previous games had. Also, Scott!!! You managed to put this into the LORE by making it William’s hell, MUAH, couldnt have done it better!!!
FNaF 2: This one might have bias for being the peak of the fandom, but it was one of the greatest times to be in that fandom. Freaking out over the trailers, theories galore, prequel vs sequel, and just... so good. 1 didn’t have much plot, 2 DID. 2 had more mechanics and strategy to it than 1, and gave us over twice as many characters! We finally got a “face” to our killer, Mr. Purple Man, and how could I ever complain about more Phone Guy~? This one also introduced the 8-bit minigames, which became a HUGE staple for the series! Perfect expansion of the first!
Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria Simulator: The PERFECT blend of old and new gameplay. The salvage scenes are intense, the nights had a great balancing mechanic of juggling doing tasks while also avoiding animatronics, multiple endings, and a neat tycoon segment to give the player a breather... but with LORE!!! Midnight Motorist is easily one of the best tracks in the series. Also has a GREAT canonical ending, when(with paired with UCN), ties the plots of 1-6 SO nicely with a neat bow.
S
FNaF 1: Okay. From a personal and gameplay standpoint, I was going to put this much lower. Like B or C. That being said... this has to go in S. Yes, it has the least lore and arguably the worst gameplay(too much RNG for 4/20 mode), but this was the game. I can’t even exaggerate when I say just how much FNaF changed not only the gaming community, but especially the horror and indie communities. So many names got big from this: Markiplier, Dawko, Game Theory, The Living Tombstone, DA Games, SCOTT HIMSELF, just to name a few!!! And to think, this was originally going to be Scott’s last game! FNaF changed gaming HISTORY, and I think that alone makes this title deserving of S.
FNaF VR, Help Wanted: Okay, personal bias time, but I truly think VR deserves this S. Seeing Glitchtrap for the first time incited a panic in me that I hadn’t felt since FNaF 1 and 2. You get FNaF 1-4 in one, all in VR, WONDERFUL character models that you can WATCH MOVE!!! SO many minigames and fun challenges to play, so many neat knickknacks to collect, the Halloween update is FANTASTIC. The introduction of some great characters, such as: Glitchtrap, Vanny, Tape Girl, Dreadbear, Grim Foxy, etc!!! There’s also just- something so nice about being able to see every office and the pizzeria in 3D spaces where you can look around! Just from a gameplay and environment standpoint, this was an AMAZING addition and deserves the S.
... Thanks for listening to me ramble XD If you disagree... then good for you! I won’t fight anyone on this, I’m aware that this is a lot of personal bias. But if you made it this far... thanks for hearing me ramble!!!!
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The Issue with Gen’s wasted Character Potential
With the manga about to reach its end I thought it worthwhile to have a closer look at how Gen’s character has been written. And the conclusion I'm coming to is that things started promising but then ended with already established potential not getting used.
Let’s start at the beginning. I don't believe that by the time of their introduction, any of the Sato squad’s new members had a clear and finished backstory. Or if, that it must have gotten changed while the story was progressing.
At this point it is difficult to say what the initial intention had been. But looking at Gen’s introduction, I always had the impression he and Takahashi didn't use to know each other before, came to the meeting alone and met there for the first time, instantly developing sympathy for each other. Something of the body and facial language in their first panel just seems too distant for me to signal anything else. And taking into account that until chapter 66.5 it hadn’t been confirmed that they shared a backstory, I view an individual arrival still as a possibility. Gen stating some time after the Grant Pharma arc that he possesses no ghost is no contradiction; just because Kou was clumsy enough to attract attention and got caught doesn't mean Gen wouldn't have been able to attend the black ghost meeting undetected.
Either way, only moments later, as soon as Sato's plan was established, he and Takahashi were able to quickly adapt to the situation and work together in harmony. Be it because they used to already know each other or by forming an instant strong connection. This moment already established the pattern that functioning together came easy to them while with Tanaka in the equitation friction would develop easily. But interestingly on the newly formed team all disharmony vanished at first, the operation on Grant Pharma ending a success.
I think this is about the only time in the manga where Gen is completely on his own and it’s impressive how good his nerves are during this moment. He stays calm, analyses the situation and delivers the needed information. And he has to do all of this while Takahashi is constantly being killed right next to him, yet Gen doesn’t get nervous at all.
That kind of levelheadedness would last until into the Forge Arc. And then getting reduced for the sake of preparing a “twist” lacking any solid foundation. Regardless of what one thinks of Gen being human or him and Takahashi supposed to have been brothers all along, from a storytelling perspective it makes zero sense to hide this all away from the reader until the last second. Like, that’s it? That’s the twist? How is this supposed to be relevant again? One of the random sidekicks to the main baddy –who you always knew wouldn’t have a chance to make it to the end- died instead of having gotten captured. I doubt anyone but the less than 20 people who used to ship takagen cared. These characters were about to disappear from the story either way, the average reader wouldn’t care about the surrounding details because these two were not the kind of characters that were given enough relevance. Or more, after a strong introduction, relevance and focus kept getting taken away from them.
Because relevance is the second factor why the reveals at the end were a bad way to progress the story. Since it got clear that some intended surprise was along its way (being shocking for the purpose of being shocking always looks forced), Takahashi and especially Gen were shoved further away into the background of happenings, given little to do. And that was a waste, frankly, taking into account how active both of them were allowed to behave shortly after their introductions. Remember them both supporting Sato with their sniping skills during the Grant Pharma attack? Sniping is a task complicated to do right but both of them were proving to be capable. Together and on their own: The moment Takahashi was taken out by enemy snipers, Gen was perfectly able to calmly overview and asset the situation, like this gathering together the information Tanaka needed to advance further and deal with those threats.
So, you have these two characters who have proven to be capable during stressful situations with a reliable mind and then the manga just… shoved them aside. Not just by lessening focus on them but by downright ignoring the ways they would have been able to contribute to their team. Cutting their teeth and claws further and further, first by putting more of a focus on their drug using habits (edgy. Now we know they’re bad guys for sure. Don’t get me started on addiction getting used as an indicator of morality) and then taking this further until they were reduced to not much more than moving props clowning around in the background. Compare that to Okuyama, whose early established technical skills kept getting efficiently used to advance the plot.
The curse got broken. After years of silence chapter 59 finally allowed Gen to speak again. Unfortunately barely anyone still remembered he existed or what he had brought to the plot so far.
Letting all this potential go to waste, for what? Because more of a focus would have threatened to reveal those wannabe twists? Something that turned out as boring as “one was human all along but the writing never told us that for no good reason”. It is hard to imagine after all the Sato squad was unaware about this important little detail: Not with their habit to regenerate themselves or their injured comrades via shooting themselves back to life during operations. With this they would have needed getting informed about Gen not being an ajin.
And the sudden sibling status about to get introduced resulting in “Gen’s dialogue needs to get reduced into nothing, otherwise it would become too obvious he and Takahashi being brothers was a last minute idea, with them going against local conventions by not calling each other “brother”, instead using their last names ever since.” Yeah, how did that work out? Now we have actual implied canonical incest because Takahashi and Gen being related changed nothing about the fact they were giving off the most obvious couple vibes this manga had to offer, making it look they were actively hiding being related. Where did it go wrong? Was “Gen is human” installed as a possible twist last minute late in the game, kept nebulous in case some better idea came up? (The hints were always vague guesswork at best, supposed to be able to go both ways, and unlike the anime the manga didn’t have the foresight to prepare it as believable by keeping Gen out of the most dangerous situations and reducing this drug consuming habit to a zero. So, am I supposed to look at it as a deliberate suicide mission on his part in manga context? Was his nihilism this deeply rooted here?) And what about the sibling retcon? Was “he joined this non-human extremist group for the sake of supporting his friend” sounding too gay an explanation, so in an attempt to erase that away they were retconned brothers? Would at least explain why those two look absolutely nothing alike despite supposed to be related.
Ironically this accidental incestuous implication was the only element working here in favour of story telling and character development. Disillusioned incestuous couple disappointed with life drifts into nihilism and thus resonates with Sato's ruthless modus operandi? Now that's the kind of variation and originality I like to see in fiction.
Interesting how Gen just shrugs his shoulders and goes back to routine once told the hostages already served their purpose. Zero sentimentalities to be seen.
I’m glad the story at least let those two stay loyal to Sato until the end, keeping the last bit of relevance in place that differentiated them from their (former) teammates. Takahashi and Gen had bloodthirsty motivations long before they met Sato, so it makes sense those shared similarities kept deepening the bond of those three. It makes sense on a level of characterization and interpersonal relation as well: I’d go as far as to say that Sato was most likely one of the few (the first?) people who accepted them the way they were. Attentive as he was it is hard to imagine he would have missed any aspect of the nature of their relationship. Yet his demeanour towards them never changed, more, as time went on the three of them grew closer. Being met with this kind of acceptance, it is easy to see why Takahashi’s and Gen’s loyalty towards Sato would have strengthened over time as well. Add to this that those three had a pretty similar mind set and voila. A unit that could have had it all, hadn’t it been for the story’s need to play it safe and prepare circumstances so the “good” guys (anyone seriously believing the status quo of using captured ajin for experiments would have changed without outside pressure?) win because of reasons.
This manga has many strengths but the recent habit to insert plot threads that keep dangling and are leading to nowhere or constant retcons that backpedal on what was previous established are none of it. Seeing how the manga started losing its way shortly after the Forge Arc ended and how the plot is now stumbling around in an attempt to reach an ending has been a disappointment, exactly because the story already has proven so many times that it can be excellent under the right circumstances. Alas, hope gets snatched away last.
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MIND MY WICKED WORDS AND TIPSY TOPSY SLURS; I CAN’T TAKE THIS PLACE, NO, I CAN’T TAKE THIS PLACE.
𝖖 𝖚 𝖔 𝖙 𝖊 𝖘
i don’t feel very human anymore. —7:59 pm 4/28/15; l.m.
Where did you get those big eyes? My mother. And where did you get those lips? My mother. And the loneliness? My mother. And that broken heart? My mother. And the absence, where did you get that? My father. —Inheritance, Warsan Shire
“And I’m a master of speaking silently—all my life I’ve spoken silently and I’ve lived through entire tragedies in silence.”— The Meek One, Fyodor Dostoevsky
How do you move on? You move on when your heart finally understands that there is no turning back. —J.R.R. Tolkien
“There are no permanent friends, only permanent interests”
UNTIL LIONS HAVE THEIR OWN HISTORIANS, THE STORY OF THE HUNT WILL ALWAYS GLORIFY THE HUNTER.— Chinua Achebe
“Self-hatred is only ever a seed planted from outside in. But when you do that to a child, it becomes a weed so thick, and it grows so fast, the child doesn’t know any different. It becomes as natural as gravity.”— Hannah Gadsby, Nanette
You got to take a deep breath and give up. The system is rigged against you. Bo Burnham
𝖇 𝖆 𝖘 𝖎 𝖈
NAME: Peter Thomas Pettigrew NICKNAMES: Pete, Wormtail, or Wormy AGE: Twenty BIRTHDAY: August 22nd GENDER: Male PRONOUNS: He / Him
𝖋 𝖆 𝖒 𝖎 𝖑 𝖞
MOTHER: Enid Pettigrew. 47. Alive. FATHER: Sean Morivan. 52. Status Unknown. SIBLINGS: None
𝖕 𝖍 𝖞 𝖘 𝖎 𝖈 𝖆 𝖑 𝖆𝖙𝖙𝖗𝖎𝖇𝖚𝖙𝖊𝖘
FACE CLAIM: Alex Wolff BUILD: Moderately Overweight HAIR: In need of a haircut. Curly and unkempt. HAIR COLOR: Brunette. In the summertime, it gets a golden, almost colorless hue. EYE COLOR: Brown SKIN COLOR: Light with olive undertones DOMINANT HAND: Right ANOMALIES: He has a birthmark on his left shoulder. His skin freckles in the summer. He also has faint scars on the inside of both of his forearms. He also has a small tattoo on the outside of his right thigh. Peter got it on a dare and it looks like ( x ) SCENT: He often smells like chocolate or peppermint. Mostly because those are the last things they would have eaten. ACCENT: British. More of the cockney nature than anything else. ALLERGIES: He is moderately allergic to dairy. Not enough to stop him of course, but enough to make him uncomfortable if he eats too much of it. DISORDERS: N / A FASHION: Peter wears whatever is comfortable and fits for the most part. He does tend to stick to neutral colors, like black, grey, and beige. He doesn’t like to draw attention to himself. NERVOUS TICS: He stutters when he’s nervous. He also rubs the back of his neck when he’s uncomfortable. QUIRKS: His quirks are identical to his nervous tics. One doesn’t often happen without the other.
𝖑 𝖎 𝖋 𝖊 𝖘 𝖙 𝖞 𝖑 𝖊
RESIDES: Plainview Point Apartments BORN: St. Mungo’s RAISED: A little outside of London PETS: A Tawny Owl named Eros
CAREER: Obliviator EXPERIENCE: 2+ years in the position EMPLOYER: The Ministry of Magic
POLITICAL AFFILIATION: The Order BELIEFS: Peter doesn’t believe strictly in anything. MISDEMEANORS: None FELONIES: None DRUGS: None SMOKES: Tobacco, and occasionally Marijuana ALCOHOL: Infrequently DIET: Poor
LANGUAGES: English, Welsh, and some Italian
PHOBIAS: Death or Serious Injury. HOBBIES: Reading and Baking. TRAITS: { + }: forgiving, analytical, easy-going, optimistic { - }: fearful, cunning, indecisive, meek
𝖋 𝖆 𝖛 𝖔 𝖗 𝖎 𝖙 𝖊 𝖘
LOCATION: Anywhere that is small, where Peter feels like no one can get to him. SPORTS TEAM: Ireland GAME: Wizard’s Chess. MUSIC: He doesn’t care much for music. If he does listen to it it’s softer sounding music, that’s almost wistful. MOVIES: Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope 1980. Alien is a close second. FOOD: Anything sweet. Peter’s sweet tooth is insatiable. BEVERAGE: Pumpkin Juice or soda. COLOR: Pale Yellow
𝖒 𝖆 𝖌 𝖎 𝖈
ALUMNI HOUSE: Gryffindor WAND: UNICORN: Unicorn hair generally produces the most consistent magic, and is least subject to fluctuations and blockages. Wands with unicorn cores are generally the most difficult to turn to the Dark Arts. They are the most faithful of all wands, and usually remain strongly attached to their first owner, irrespective of whether he or she was an accomplished witch or wizard. Minor disadvantages of unicorn hair are that they do not make the most powerful wands (although the wand wood may compensate) and that they are prone to melancholy if seriously mishandled, meaning that the hair may ‘die’ and need replacing. FIR: My august grandfather, Gerbold Octavius Ollivander, always called wands of this wood ‘the survivor’s wand,’ because he had sold it to three wizards who subsequently passed through mortal peril unscathed. There is no doubt that this wood, coming as it does from the most resilient of trees, produces wands that demand staying power and strength of purpose in their true owners, and that they are poor tools in the hands of the changeable and indecisive. Fir wands are particularly suited to Transfiguration, and favor owners of focused, strong-minded and, occasionally, intimidating demeanor. 9 1/2 Inches and unyielding. AMORTENTIA: Chocolate, Peppermint, Garlic, and Old Books. PATRONUS: He cannot produce one. BOGGART: Prior to the war it had been his mother dying. He truly doesn’t know what he would do without her. However, since the war has begun his Boggart is Lord Voldemort.
𝖈 𝖍 𝖆 𝖗 𝖆 𝖈 𝖙 𝖊 𝖗
MORAL ALIGNMENT: True Neutral MBTI: INTP
INTPs are often thoroughly engaged in their own thoughts, and usually, appear to others to be offbeat and unconventional. The INTP’s mind is the most active place, and their inward orientation can mean that they neglect superficial things like home décor or appropriate clothing. They don’t tend to bother with small talk but can become downright passionate when talking about science, mathematics, computers, or the larger theoretical problems of the universe. Reality is often of only passing interest to the Architect, as they are more interested in the theory behind it all.INTPs are typically precise in their speech and communicate complex ideas with carefully chosen words. They insist on intellectual rigor in even the most casual of conversations, and will readily point out inconsistencies of thought or reasoning. Social niceties may fall by the wayside for an INTP who is more interested in analyzing logic, and they may offend others by smallmitting their dearly held values and beliefs to logical scrutiny. Trivia: - more likely than other types to study a foreign language - most frequent type among college students committing alcohol and drug policy violations - have the lowest level of coping resources of all the types - one of the types least likely to believe in a spiritual power - highest of all types in career dissatisfaction in school have lower grades than would be -- predicted by aptitude scores - more likely than average to complete engineering programs - personal values include autonomy, freedom, and independence - Overrepresented among working MBA students - Commonly found in science and technical occupations - famous intps: albert einstein, abraham lincoln, marie curie, and charles darwin
MBTI ROLE: The Architect or the Logician ENNEAGRAM: Type Five ENNEAGRAM ROLE:
The Observer: Fives are alert, insightful, and curious. They are able to concentrate and focus on developing complex ideas and skills. Independent, innovative, and inventive, they can also become preoccupied with their thoughts and imaginary constructs. They become detached, yet high-strung and intense. They typically have problems with eccentricity, nihilism, and isolation. At their Best: visionary pioneers, often ahead of their time, and able to see the world in an entirely new way.
TEMPERAMENT:
Melancholic. The melancholic temperament is fundamentally introverted and thoughtful. Melancholic people often were perceived as very (or overly) pondering and considerate, getting rather worried when they could not be on time for events. Melancholics can be highly creative in activities such as poetry and art - and can become preoccupied with the tragedy and cruelty in the world. Often they are perfectionists. They are self-reliant and independent; one negative part of being a melancholic is that they can get so involved in what they are doing they forget to think of others.
WESTERN ZODIAC:
Leo With the Sun approaching the end of Leo, August 22nd has its peak in creativity and our childish need to present our inner being and express ourselves. This is an emotional date when passions need to be calmed in order for us to swim out of them with a clear mind and a plan we can hold on to, so our dreams can be reached. Those born at this time are connected to others on a different level than the rest of Leo representatives and feel a constant need to set free from ego battles and follow their hearts.
CHINESE ZODIAC:
Year of the Rat The Metal Rat are honest, frank, and optimistic, and will not get depressed no matter how terrible the situation is. They have a quick respond and strong environmental adaptability. They treat people kindly. But most of the people born in 1960 year of the Rat are self-centered. They always think of themselves first. They are impatient, suspicious and kind of vain.
PRIMAL SIGN:
Otter: Social, funny, and outgoing, those born under the sign of the Otter use their warmth and charm as their primary tool in navigating life. Like their animal namesake, members of this sign are clever, feisty, and gregarious. They usually spend a lot of time grooming themselves for their looks are of great importance to them. They are not terribly territorial either, preferring to sleep where their adventure takes them for the night. A nice home will eventually be required, but a young Otter can travel the world for years without getting too homesick. Otters like to be in charge. This way they can not only get what they want, but receive attention and respect while doing so. They can occasionally behave somewhat self-centered and egotistical, but are usually smart enough not to push their self-proclaimed authority too far. Otters want to be the best, and they understand that being the best takes work. As long as they get to do thing their own way, there is little they won’t undertake.Members of this sign have a sense of pride that only a few other signs can top. They absolutely hate looking unintentionally foolish (though they will act the part of the fool if it gets them a good laugh) and have little tolerance for those who don’t respect this important (if unspoken) rule. They like to be seen as evolved, wise, and powerful, which they often are, but this can sometimes cause them to hesitate trying new things. Above all things, Otters don’t like to live by other people’s rules. As long as they keep life in perspective this shouldn’t be a big problem, but out of perspective Otters risk becoming greedy and narrow-minded and there is always a chance that they will take what they want if nobody is willing to offer it up to them. Members of this sign can also be a bit judgmental of others, particularly those who are less successful than they are at that point in their lives. As they mature they tend to realize that everyone operates differently, and will slowly come to accept this, especially if they have a hard road to reaching their goals.
TAROT CARD:
The Fool: The Fool, at its core, represents the unfettered soul. Free of experience and prejudice, they are also free of fear, and therefore come into new events without the trepidation often experienced by those that know what they might expect. This is both a benefit and a detriment to the Fool, their eyes are on the path ahead, or on the sky, but not at what is right in front of them. This can make the Fool easy to trick, to persuade, or to side-line. But they also do not know what others believe is ‘NOT’ possible, and this makes them capable of greatness, new ideas, and innovation. They do not know a thing cannot be done, so they merrily set about to do it anyway. Sometimes they succeed.
TV TROPES:
All the Other Reindeer, The Chessmaster, Cornered Rattlesnake, Dirty Coward, Fair Weather Friend, and Opportunistic Bastard
SONGS:
- Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons - If It Kills Me by Jason Mraz - Sinner Man by Idris Elba - Creep by Radiohead - The Devil You Know by X Ambassadors
IDEOLOGIES:
- Beer is the scum of all the alcoholic beverages. He think it tastes akin to piss and doesn’t understand why anyone would opt to drink it willingly. - Peter has never had a pet aside from the owl. And doesn’t understand the want to keep things in captivity for your own benefit. This principle extends to muggle zoos as well. - Chocolate frogs are the best candy that Honeydukes sells, this is not a matter of discussion that he is willing to hear. - Peter believes that if something is easier done through violence than diplomacy that in those instances the people should be empowered to pursue violence without diplomacy first. - Wool is a terrible fabric and he won’t wear it. It’s itchy.
#dulcetask#TASK: 001#▲ ĸιlled мy old ѕelғ вυт тнe new мe ιѕn'т мυcн вeттer ( peter hc )#tw eye gore#// kind of#// it's a black eye
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Life is a zero-sum game. Worthlessness is the default condition. What but willful blindness could possibly shelter people from such withering criticism? It is for such reasons that a whole generation of social psychologists recommended “positive illusions” as the only reliable route to mental health. Their credo? Let a lie be your umbrella. A more dismal wretched, pessimistic philosophy can hardly be imagined: things are so terrible that only delusion can save you.
There will always be people better than you - that’s a cliche of nihilism, like the phrase, In a million years, who’s going to know the difference? The proper response to that statement is not, Well, then, everything is meaningless. It’s, Any idiot can choose a frame of time within which nothing matters. Talking yourself into irrelevance is not a profound critique of Being. It’s a cheap trick of the rational mind.
Standards of better or worse are not illusory or unnecessary. If you hand’t decided that what you are doing right now was better than the alternatives, you wouldn’t be doing it. The idea of a value-free choice is a contradiction in terms. Value judgments are a precondition for action. Furthermore, every activity, once chosen, comes with its own internal standards for accomplishment. If something can be done at all, it can be done better or worse. To do anything at all is therefore to play a game with a defined and valued end, which can always be reached more or less efficiently and elegantly. Every game comes with its chance of success or failure. Differentials in quality are omnipresent. Furthermore, if there was no better or worse, nothing would be worth doing. There would be no value and, therefore, no meaning. Why make an effort if it doesn’t improve anything? Meaning itself requires the differences between better or worse.
We live within a framework that defines the present as eternally lacking and the future as eternally better. If we did not see things this way, we would not act at all. We wouldn’t even be able to see, because to see we must focus, and to focus we must pick one thing above all else on which to focus.
The Bible is, for better or worse, the foundational document of Western civilization (of Western values, Western morality, and Western conceptions of good and evil). It’s the product of processes that remain fundamentally beyond our comprehension. The Bible is a library composed of many books, each written and edited by many people. It’s a truly emergent document - a selected, sequenced and finally coherent story written by no one and everyone over many thousands of years. The Bible has been thrown up, out of the deep, by the collective human imagination, which is itself a product of unimaginable forces operating over unfathomable spans of time. Its careful, respectful study can reveal things to us about what we believe and how we do and should act that can be discovered in almost no other manner.
Was that reasonable? Was that just? Was that fair? The authors of the Old Testament asked such questions with extreme caution and under very limited conditions. They assumed, instead, that the Creator of Being knew what he was doing, that all power was essentially with Him, and that His dictates should be carefully followed. They were wise. He was a Force of Nature. Is a hungry lion reasonable, fair, or just? What kind of nonsensical question is that? The Old Testament Israelites and their forebears knew that God was not to be trifled with and that whatever Hell the angry Deity might allow to be engendered if he was crossed was real. Having recently passed through a century defined by the bottomless horrors of Hitler, Stalin, and Mao, we might realize the same thing.
What do you know about yourself? You are, on the one hand, the most complex thing in the entire universe, and on the other, someone who can’t even set the clock on your microwave. Don’t over-estimate your self-knowledge.
What is it that bothering me? Is that something I could fix? and Would i actually be willing to fix it? If you find that the answer is “no” to any of the questions, then look elsewhere. Aim lower. Search until you find something that bothers you, that you could fix, that you would fix, and then fix it. That might be enough for the day.
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i feel like you're pretty biased in that quest post, can make every quest in FO sound bad if you just phrase it a certain way :/
Oh no, I am absolutely biased, but for good fucking reason.
Even if you boiled down the New Vegas companion quests to single lines, they still have a hell of a lot more going for them story wise then 80% of the Fallout 4 ones.
Lets compare two quests from each game, Lily Bowen’s in Fallout NV and Nick Valentine’s in Fallout 4. i pick these two because a) they are both non-humans who’s quests revolve around memories, b) they are diametrically opposed in terms of length and gameplay, and c) they both end in three choices.
Lily Bowen’s quest isn’t even really a quest as it isn’t marked in the game as one. All it encompasses is a short conversation ending in three choices for the player. All you have to do to start this ‘quest’ is a) see her go into a rampage as Leo and b) hear her listening to tapes of her and her grandkids before she became a mutant. Each choice has different consequences both good and bad, and making that choice is entirely up to what you personally think is more moral.
Do you tell her to keep taking her meds to become a more stable mutant. but effectively giving up her past humanity and family? Do you tell her to stop, eventually becoming worse and worse but fully able to remember her grandkids? Or do you tell her to keep taking the half dose, always muddled and confused but still able to cling to her memories as she has been?
At the end of the game, you are shown what happens to Lily based on your choice. Her life is affected permanently by you and you have to live with that. Depending on what you choose, Lily either throws away those tapes, having gained clarity and stability from the meds, but no longer able to remember who is even on the tapes, she loses all sense of herself without the meds, becoming like every other Nightkin, or she continues as is, confused and unsure, eventually leaving the Mojave to try and find answers.
Now Nick Valentine’s quest in comparison is gamewise long and with many different components. First you have to reach a certain affinity with him, and then he tells you about how the personality used for him was of a cop whose fiancee was brutally murdered. Even though this person was not Nick the android’s fiancee, he still feels the hurt and loss at her death and wants answers in regards to her killer. You have to travel across the wasteland to find 10 tapes.
Once all 10 are found its revealed that his not-fiancee’s killer, Eddie Winters, is still alive 200 years later, having ghoulified himself, in a sealed bunker. Once he is found, you have three options, kill Eddie, help Nick kill Eddie, or Nick kills Eddie. No matter what you chose, Eddie will die and the quest ends by walking a few yards outside of the bunker to where Nick’s not-fiancee is buried and you have a short conversation. Nothing about him changes. There’s no real choices. There’s no endings you’ve influenced or questions the game made you ask yourself.
Compare and contrast. Lily is probably the weakest in terms of character in New Vegas as she is introduced as a joke when you first meet her. ‘Oh a mutant who thinks she’s a grandma! She thinks I’m her grandson, Billy! She’s wearing a funny hat!’ It makes the resulting revelation and choice even more of a gut punch. There was subtle build up to it because you knew all of the factors going in, just not how important they really were, and it made you view Lily in a new light and made you question if you had done right by her.
Nick started out as a really strong character, was extremely well written, so his quest should be just as strong but the result falls flat in comparison to him. There’s no real build up to it, there’s not much depth to it. I don’t think he even mentions having the not-fiancee memories before the quest begins.
The only F4 quest that holds a candle to NV is Danse. You spend time with him, you know how much he and his organization hates synths, you learn about how much he cares about his fallen friend and how much the BoS means to him, which are all things you learn BEFORE the quest begins, only to find out he’s everything he’s ever hated. And there are choices at the end! Do you kill him for the Brotherhood, convince Maxson to keep him around, or have him defect? Each of these is a moral choice on your part and makes you think, and would have a marked effect on Danse as a person. It makes you, the player, feel something for this person you’ve been putzing around with for hours at this point, which is what a backstory quest should, in my mind, do. It should be a culmination of everything you’ve come to learn about this person over the game. Which Danse’s quest absolutely does.
But that’s one companion. Out of 13. And one backstory quest. Out of 5. And the other four of those five are shallow, lackluster puddles in comparison. Cait is a psycho addict due to past trauma and you fix her addiction with a machine. Curie wants to be more human so you make her a synth. Macready has a sick son, made some bad choices because of that, and you need to kill two people after him and fetch a cure to send to the absent son.There’s little depth. There’s little nuance. There’s nothing that invokes thoughtful reflection, nothing that makes you wonder if you made the right choice. It’s just ‘here’s my problem, this is what you need to do to fix it, have my perk’.
Compare it to New Vegas, where even my 2nd least favorite companion, Boone, had such an evocative backstory quest that I was questioning why I didn’t like him. Over the course of the game, he went from ‘sad sack military boy who’s wife and unborn child were sold into slavery so he mercy killed them how edgy’ to ‘ex-soldier who has PTSD because he followed orders on a miscommunication that resulted in him actively participating in a mass slaughter of innocent civilians that haunts him to this day and you need to help him relive these memories, save that same settlement he once open fired on, and come out the other side with a new perspective on life for better or worse’. His ending can be anything from joining back up with his old unit in an effort to atone for past mistakes to committing suicide due to his apathetic nihilism over what he’s done, and that is all dependent on your choices as a player and the end slides have you confront that.
Which is why I find Lily’s barely-a-quest quest and Nick’s multi-location, at least half an hour long quest so indicative of the two games and their differences. One was a moral choice that had you questions your own personal thoughts and feelings and in the end, face those consequences.
The other was a glorified fetch quest.
So am I biased? Yes. Do I have a good reason to be so? Abso-fucking-lutely.
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