#its easier for me to post like this instead of copy pasting bc i find it like.

[but-a-humble-selfshipper]

Some raw thoughts

[phantom-freak]

hiii mod! sorry to kinda hijack ur post! buutt.

dearest anon: i dont like you. so i am going to pick apart your argument. because in my opinion it makes 0 sense.

I. "[...] when you use RP tags in everything you post, you make it really difficult for people -- even those who already follow you -- to find other folks who post in the same RP community as you."

if someone is using tags, it makes it EASIER to find people like them because if you click on the tag, it brings up other posts that are tagged with it! isnt that neat? so unless someone is posting every minute, it's not that big of a problem, especially in tags with a lot of people that post in them! while pkmn irl has like 4 related general tags, the blog you posted this to uses all 4 which means you can see what goes on in all 4 tags. that is good, bc some folks such as myself only use one or two. so if you don't check all four you might miss out on quality posts!

also, tags are MEANT TO BE USED !!! theyre not just decoration or something to staple on to plump up your post!! they are like the bay leaves of tumblr! is that a good analogy? i dont cook much.

II. "using a tag too often can get you autoflagged for spam, which can get your profile restricted or shadowbanned."

this is NOT true! first of all, look at tumblr. this website is held together by tears, tape, and a copious amount of caffiene. do you think it can have a full fledged autoflagging system? and if it did, wouldn't they use it?

second! shadow banning does not exist on tumblr, as far as im aware! which means that this spoooky punishment can't happen!

III. "[...] stop using RP tags for every post, and instead simply make a basic promo and repost it every month [...]"

you claim that this will increase visibility! HOWEVER! when you use the handy tag search mentioned in part I, you only see ROOT posts. which means that reblogs will not be seen! since, under your advice, the user is only using a tag on an original post once a month or so, they will rarely- if ever- show up in the tag! this means LESS visibility, which means LESS interaction! the EXACT OPPOSITE of what you think will happen!

IV. The mighty Block Button

based on the fact you seem to have copied and pasted this to some specific blogs, it seems to me like you have a problem with just that: a few specific blogs. that's what this handy button is for:

dont like that blog? block em! you can do it for a lot of reasons: theyre too political, theyre being kind of an ass, or even just because you dont like em. its quick, its easy, and its free! you curate your own experiences! it also removes them from the dash! which means you wont see them if they really are Spamming It Up!

V. Back to your regular programming

aight rant over. have a nice day, dont forget to take your meds, and go touch grass (or dirt sand or snow) sometimes. its good for you.

Hiya. Please be aware that when you use RP tags in everything you post, you make it really difficult for people -- even those who already follow you -- to find other folks who post in the same RP community as you. Additionally, using a tag too often can get you autoflagged for spam, which can get your profile restricted or shadowbanned. I firmly but kindly recommend that you stop using RP tags for every post, and instead simply make a basic promo and repost it every month or so for visibility in the community. Have a good one! :)

// Hey anon, I respect you trying to help, but i dont use a ton of tags. and even then, i dont put tags on every post of line anymore.

// I haven’t even made any proper posts on this blog in almost a week, let alone tagged anything. Of the last five posts on this blog, only 2 of them had any tags at all.

// Edit: Also, if you just don’t like seeing my blog then just block this blog instead of acting like someone who’s above everyone else. This community is based around fun for everyone. You’re not the manager of this community, so respectfully buzz off.

[indomies]

#showyourprocess

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES — When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag up to 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours!

sabrina @lanwangiji​, my love, tagged me to share my process of making this typography edit! check out her explanation of her the untamed edit and her edit tag. 

1. PLANNING

i once opened lyrics edit requests so i can learn and practice typography. this edit was a request as well. i asked them which lyrics they wanted to have and the colors they’d like. since i got several requests and it was hard to keep tabs on them, i made a trello board so i could organize everything. i’m still using the trello board for every edit idea i have, the board makes my life easier.

above is what i filled the card in the board with. basically just information of the requests.

1.1 INSPIRATION

once i got the request, my first thought was to find the vibe the song/lyrics exude. “it’s an old curse” screamed witchy vibes to me, so i went to pinterest to find some inspirations. at first i was looking for witchy poster designs and i came across this. i liked how it has smoke-ish graphic and i thought the smoke suited the “old curse” lyrics. and tbh pinterest is a rabbit hole, they gave me suggestions after suggestions, like this and this which became my inspiration for the color palette (i added the gold from those pics) and the sun moon design gave me the idea to incorporate space stuffs too. i somehow landed on this too, and because i wanted to include space theme, i made a simple phases of the moon. ultimately the hero of this edit was the lyrics, i didnt want the graphics took the center stage. i was inspired to make a crystal ball and do this kind of typography but after several trials i couldnt get the the typography right, so i scratched that idea and went with the space theme instead.

1.2 PICKING COLORS

after i was feeling inspired enough, i went looking for the right colors. i usually just type “color name” and “palette” on pinterest. example “dark grey color palette” and i chose the one i liked best. when the request only asked for 1 color, i always searched for either a complimentary or contrasting color to give it a jushz, to add sprinkles. that’s why i added gold on top of the dark grey. 

1.3 FINDING FONTS

this is the hardest part. the fonts play important role to the design. they need to convey the vibes of the lyrics, in this case witchy/magic vibe. i needed to find fonts or font just as magical and a bit whimsical. tho i hoard fonts... i like to use new font for every typography edit lmao sue me.

i highly recommend going to creativemarket free goods site, pixelsurplus font freebies and behance to search for fonts. i always use 100% free fonts, that means i can use it personally as well as commercially. creativemarket gives me desktop license for the fonts, which means i can use it for commercial as well. the reason i do this because i want to open an etsy shop someday, and i want to have the right license when i sell my stuffs. i almost never buy fonts bc they are expensive lmao. 

the fonts in used are “Vintage” for the main typograpy (i think i was a freebie from creativemarket) and “Morganite” for the title of the lyrics and the name of artist. 

2. CREATING

once i have my materials and ideas, i open my illustrator and hope it doesnt crash every 5 min.

for this kind of typography edits, i use 600x700 px. tbh i dont like using 540px, the suggested tumblr size, as the width bc to me it doesn’t look as good in quality, so i up the px. but more on this sizing later. i utilize the artboards function in illustrator, and i use 2 artboards.

i use illustrator (ai) bc i’m working with vectors. when i work with vectors, the graphics/texts or whatever im making in ai wont become blurry or lose its quality when i enlarge or shrink it. in compare to photoshop, i need to make for example the moon graphic very big, so i wont lose the quality when i reduce and enlarge it again. with vector, i can start small and when i expand it, it’s still as good as when it’s tiny. 

2.1 GRADIENTS

i started with the gradients first. i created a rectangle as big as 600x700px and with the “freeform gradient” tool in ai, i played with the colors. below is the color palettes i used

2.2 LYRICS AND GRAPHICS

once the gradients are done, i worked with the lyrics and graphics right away. when i first doing this edits, i made typos a lot lmaooooooo. so i copy and pasted the lyrics on top of my artboard, so i wouldnt have any typos. 

i had 3 layers in my ai. one for the inspo pics and the OG lyrics. the rest for the edits themselves. i broke up “It's an old curse/dreamers diving headfirst” into to parts, hence the 2 more layers

i almost always started with the lyrics first then the graphics. but for this edit, i made the smoke first so i can layout where my text would be.

tbh the process of making the lyrics is a trial and error. i tried bunch of different stuffs and i chose whatever the best. but i worked like methodically, i made sure i finished the first part of the lyrics first then i could move on.

i was lucky with this font “vintage”. the font offers me several glyphs like these

and i chose the one at the bottom. you’re very lucky if you find a font and they have glyphs.

excursion: glyphs vs fonts

glyph is an individual character. It might be a letter, an accented letter, a ligature, a punctuation mark, a dingbat, etc.

A font is a digital file which is used to display a typeface, which contains the entire upper- and lowercase alphabet as well as punctuation, numbers, and other special characters.

after i was finished with all the lyrics i added some graphics to make the edit pretty like small stars or dots. i added the song title and the artist too, sometimes at the bottom sometimes at the top. and i added my watermark put it as small as i could and made it a bit invisible but still can be seen.

2.3 EXPORTING

exporting! this is where i’m going to go deeper with the dimension of my work. in ai, i always choose to save with “export as screens” function. it automatically divides the artboards i have and save them separately. i always save as png, bc the size is smaller than jpg but can maintain the quality.

now the export tab looks like this

see the formats? i always scale up my edits, 2-3 times the original artboard size. reason is, to maintain the quality. i have tried to save it as original, 600x700 px, but it turned out a bit blurry. bc everything in ai is vector, when i scale up it doesnt lose the quality. BUT once i save it as png, it’s not a vector anymore, and when you zoom in until a certain degree it’ll be pixelated. that’s why i always scale up, to avoid it becoming pixelated when it’s just zoomed 1 or 2 times.

2.4 FINAL TOUCH

i opened my photoshop and also pray it won’t crash. import the png of my edits, add some grains/noise. the reason i use photoshop is, the noise filter is way better than in ai. it’s smoother somehow. and then i export my edits.

(i have a timelapse of how i made one of my edits, it’s not this one, but it’ll give you a better visualization. find it HERE

3. POSTING

now the hardest parts are done, we go to posting!

i uploaded the 2 posters on tumblr as photos then i wrote the captions. for this typography edit, i always chose another lyrics that i like from the same song for the caption. i bolded the lyrics, add link to all of my typography gradient edits.

i always use this link to color my caption. i usually choose 3-4 colors, and i took the colors from my edit. but this was not until recently lmao. before i just took a guess and looked for similar colors that match the edit, but then i thought “why didnt i just use the color in the posters lmao”

ok after i have my html code for the caption, i go to this site to replace the “;” with “ “ so tumblr can read the code.

i’m not one who puts their edits in draft, bc i just cant wait to post it. i have to option here, either i post it immediately when the time is right (i usually post between 4-8) or i schedule it, if im finished before 4. 

i put all the necessary tags and click post! i am done finally!

i’m tagging:

@thetriangletattoo​ for this amazing series

@deludedandlostcause​ for this impressive gif

@half-lightl​ for this spectacular edit

@gayndrew​ for this stunning drawing

@thechampagnelovers​ for this cool collage

@cloudslou​ for this incredible edit

@heyangels​ for this incredible edit

[natjennie]

hey as for ur adhd reading post: yes! as for ur tags, there r def some things out there that can make text easier for ur brain to process etc, unfortunately i dont have names to give u off the top of my head (however i've often found resources made for dyslexic folks to also help my adhd brain a bunch!) but sometimes i just copy paste shit into a doc/note and put it bolded, with a font my brain likes, and usually double space the lines. besides that tho- the reason ur brain wants u to skip ahead when reading is because ur thought process is racing ahead as it usually does (#EternalADHDMood) but that doesn't mean it wants to /process/ that fast, it's like a kid on a sugar high lol, all energy, no processing. so i've actually found it helpful to allow my brain to skip ahead line by line / paragraph by paragraph just to process a few words, no spoilers, bc its like my brain has the compulsion to leap-frog ahead, but its not actually reading shit properly. so i get it out of my system by allowing my eyes to skip around a bit ahead, sometimes even scrolling (if on a device) too fast to properly read shit, just have my eyes n brain jump around, and it satisfies that need my brain has, and then i go back up and find it easier to read the rest and have my mind kind register it as 'filling in the blanks' which is more interesting to my curious adhd brain, vs reading it all meticulously in order to reach the conclusion which feels more like reading a long list that i have to struggle thru to get to the good shit/reward my brain wants. does that make any sense? lol. there's def other ways, im literally a teacher that specializes in neurodivergence and adhd, but starting as an adult vs a kid is a diff thing cause ur brain is set in its ways by now and u kinda have to gently retrain it with creative strategies i find, idk. just rambling here. that's also the eternal adhd mood haha

the resources available for dyslexic people helping with adhd too is so interesting to me! I just recently added a chrome extension that makes text the opendyslexic font and it’s helping so far. I think the thing I was thinking of that changes the color of lines is called beeline reader, if anyone else was interested. but also, allowing yourself to jump ahead for a second is a great tip. I think i keep getting caught up in like Fixing the things my adhd makes me do instead of like, working around them and accommodating for them. I gotta get better at that.

[rouge-the-bat]

i was tagged by @thegirlwiththebird on my bi-lesbian blog ! im not sure why its not letting me tag her tho, so i just put a link instead! (also some things i think were typod so i copied the list from another post i was able to find with this set up!)

rules: bold the statements that apply to you and italicize your aspirations

im changing the // between phrases to ♡♡ again so its easier for me to distinguish phrases, and to also help this be easier for me to read, my own "key" will be like:

bold: is me!

italics: aspiration~

plain text: kinda fits me

strikethrough: doesnt fit me at all

(subscript parenthesis): my comments!

💨 AIR 💨

i have small hands (i think theyre average size?) ♡♡ i love the night sky ♡♡ i watch small animals and birds when i pass them by ♡♡ i drink herbal tea ♡♡ i wake to see dawn (im often awake for it but i wake up in the afternoon :p) ♡♡ the smell of dust is comforting ♡♡ i’m valued for being wise (im not sure if i am already??? would be cool to be seen as such tho owo) ♡♡ i prefer books to music ♡♡ i meditate (i wanna try bc it may be good for me :O) ♡♡ i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

🔥 FIRE 🔥

i don’t have straight hair (my hair is very straight, unlike myself) ♡♡ i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls (indifferent on jeans, but id like to wear overalls sometime) ♡♡ i play an organized sport ♡♡ i love dogs ♡♡ i am not afraid of adventure ♡♡ i love to talk to strangers (i like meetin new ppl and chatting online, im bad with it in person tho owo;;) ♡♡ i always try new foods (depends on my mood) ♡♡ i enjoy road trips ♡♡ summer is my favorite season (nope, cant stand the heat!) ♡♡ my radio is always playing

🌊 WATER 🌊

i wear bracelets on my wrists (im wearing one on each wrist rn!) ♡♡ i love the bustle of the city ♡♡ i have more than one set of piercings (only my ears are pierced) ♡♡ I read poetry (id like to read more sometime, i just usually dont have the focus to read stuff much) ♡♡ i love the sound of a thunderstorm ♡♡ i want to travel the world ♡♡ i sleep past midday most days ♡♡ i love dimly lit diners and fluorescent signs ♡♡ i rewatch kids’ shows out of nostalgia ♡♡ i see emotions in colors, not words

🌲 EARTH 🌲

i wear glasses/contacts ♡♡ i enjoy doing the laundry ♡♡ i am a vegetarian or vegan ♡♡ i have an excellent sense of time (dear god no, its shit awful) ♡♡ my humor is very cheerful (it depends tbh? my humors all over the place, fun, silly, dark, random, just whatever) ♡♡ i am a valued advisor to my friends ♡♡ i believe in true love (like i said on one before, probably not in a typical sense) ♡♡ i love the chill of mountain air ♡♡ i’m always listening to music (i cant really stand having music going all the time a lot of the times, and my music moods are kinda scarce lately. if im always playing music on some days its probably a game soundtrack, usually instrumental. or just obsessed with one or a couple songs atm and repeating them lol) ♡♡ i am highly trusted by the people in my life

🌌 AETHER 🌌

i go without makeup in my daily life (i kinda wanna wear lipstick and blush more tho, and maybe eyeshadow/eyeliner. generally just wanna dress up more bc a nice aesthetic helps boost my energy i think) ♡♡ i make my own artwork ♡♡ i keep on track of my tasks and time ♡♡ i always know true north ♡♡ i see beauty in everything (i try to!) ♡♡ i can always smell flowers (if im outside i do, but i dont go outside much... i wanna tho) ♡♡ i smile at everyone i pass by ♡♡ i always fear history repeating itself ♡♡ i have recovered from a mental disorder (cant say ive "recovered" from any, but my depression isnt as bad as it used to be, energy is still shit tho) ♡♡ i can love unconditionally

aaaand @spiiderbiites @miphelda @kipokin @queerplyke @ameila @skayforrest this is the last post for me to catch up with these tag games, so sorry for all the tags suddenly !! hope yall dont mind <:'3

[laughing-with-god]

My Kpop Unpopular Opinons

The ‘K’ in Kpop is there for a reason....

It stands for Korean. Not American. I might be the only one who gets annoyed by how much Kpop groups are outsourcing to America. Mainly BTS since they got the farthest. But it honestly has become such a poisonous thing to me. I am half Korean and my family is very patriotic of their beautiful country. And it’s almost a colonization mindset or cultural appropriation to take a countries’ gem (such as Kpop) and demand it be taken over to YOUR country, to demand that idols learn YOUR language, to say that because Bts got praise in America they MUST be the best Kpop group. Is America the only country that matters? Should new Kpop groups try hard to appeal to Americans while their fellow Koreans take a back burner? Why can’t you let Korea have its own thing and enjoy it without trying to make it into something that’s easier for you to digest?

Stop Supporting Youtube Channels who are Using Kpop for Clout

The Talko, Watch mojo, Reaction channels and even fucking TRISHA PAYTAS. Youtubers be using Kpop for clout bc they know it’s gotten popular lately. But you hoes are the demand to the supply. STOP GIVING THESE HOES CLICKS. on a regular day, you’d hate a fake fan but are all ready to watch some YouTuber who ran out of ideas use BTS to get some views. And the info that The Talko And Watch mojo use isn’t even groundbreaking! They’d be like “did you know that Suga’s real name is Yoongi?” sis....no. Support Kpop news sites that actually are about the Korean industry as a whole and not just getting your view by using BTS.

We need to talk about the Kpop industry being ‘problematic’ and ‘slave contracts’

Idols signed up for this lifestyle. They signed up for restricted freedom, dieting, practicing a lot and working almost 24/7. Am I saying it’s right? Not necessarily...I think if an idol is fainting, very underweight and not getting their 8 hours every night then obvi the company/management needs to be handled. But we need to calm the witch hunt for some companies bc your oppa/unnie is fully aware what their career entails. And instead of coming for SM or any particular company, strive for reformation of the whole industry.

Idols are sometimes problematic....and we need to call it out

This is mainly aimed towards the problematic comments some idols have made about skin tone. I’ve seen a lot of people become upset by Wendy’s blackcent or the blackface history of Mamamoo’s past and they have every right to be. A lot of fans come to their defense and say things like “in Korea, pale skin is valued more than dark skin. (Idol name) just didn’t know better.” Well...if they didn’t know better then we should teach them better! And don’t attack other fans who are genuinely hurt about the comments/actions. I watched an unpopular opinion video and they said “people who are quick to call an idol problematic are annoying.” I’m sorry but who are you to tell someone what they can and cannot be offended by? Esp when there are TONS of black/dark skinned Kpop fans whose very skin was just insulted....

Anaylsis videos/posts about your fav otp is problematic.

Calm down. It could be real and it could not be. I already talked about this on my blog before so I’m not gonna beat a dead horse. But you’re forcing a narrative to satisfy your little fantasy.

BTS SHOULD GET MILLITARY TIME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE

In Korea, every man has to serve millitary time. It’s downright disrespectful to cherry pick a guy bc he’s famous and exempt him from his duties. Really? How the fuck should the rest of the Korean male population in boot camps feel that Jungkook got to skip his time bc he just so happens to have tons of fangirls who want to hop on his dick? Does fame get you everywhere? Is that the message you want to spread? Disgusting. If I see that in my feed, I’m blocking you hoes.

2NE1 and Big Bang ran so BlackPink and Bts could walk.

New Kpop fans want to act like Black Pink and BTS invented the fucking wheel. Wrong. Big Bang was a big inspiration to Bts and they were part of the first bridge between the western world and Kpop. Without Big Bang, Kpop wouldn’t be as big in America/other western countries as it is now. And if that didn’t happen, then Bts would loose the majority of its fan base now. And black pink is literally a copy of 2ne1, it’s not the girls fault but YG itself who knew they lost a big girl group. 2NE1 literally invented the girl crush concept and also made big leaps in the western world. Give credit where it’s due. Thank you, next.

Seungri shouldn’t have quit being an idol, he should’ve quit his businesses.

His businesses were the reason his whole scandal began. I’m not saying I was going to support him if he continued making music but like to come out and say “everyone, as punishment I’m quitting being an idol instead of the businesses that actually caused all this drama!” is the most un self-aware response.

If you stan one group, you aren’t a Kpop stan.

Korean Pop. Not BTS pop. Not BlackPink pop. Not EXO pop. Sis.....it’s like saying you know Spanish bc you can say ‘hola’. That’s a MOLESCULE to what the genre actually holds.

Big Hit not Allowing girl trainees is highkey sexist.

Yes, I’m aware of what happened to the one girl group that came from Big Hit. But honestly that’s a funny excuse. One bad thing happened and now he’s gonna ban all females? I remember this tweet that resided with me about the Empire actor faking a hate crime. It said “If one faked hate crime is enough to make you question and judge all the others....it’s almost as if you were looking for an excuse all along.” (Paraphrased.) all I’m saying is all women aren’t evil so why are the rest of inspiring girls wanting to be an idols getting punished?

Ladies, we need to treat our fellow women better.

I want to see more support for girl idols. I want us to raise them so they can be at the same level as some of these boy groups. I know we find Bts, Got7, NCT, Exo ect to be very handsome and charming but we shouldn’t abandon other women for the sake of pretty boys. Let’s hype them up. Girl groups can be talented too and we would want support if we were them. Feminists where are you when we need you??

NCT’s concept is a flop.

People don’t wanna stan a group whose members are endless and always changing. We want a group that we can relax with, grow with and truly form a bond with. This is unable to do when we constantly are seeing new faces and trying to remember names.

(This is not at all forced on anyone but I want to see some ppl’s unpopular opinions. @goldngguk @chimchimsauce @yn-dere @yeollie-yeollie if you guys wanna share any pls do, I’m all ears and tag me in it.)

[uniformbravo]

me trying to make a gif part 2 (thrilling finale, buildup ver.)

ok good news and bad news: good news being withheld for Spoilers (not that it’s that hard to guess anyway lol), bad news explained first bc, chronologically, it is first

so yesterday i mentioned in the tags of that post that i had seen that krita has an animation feature so i was gonna try importing the frames into that and then exporting it as a gif. easier said than done, as it turns out

i started by opening the file i made yesterday with 62 layers as the frames and importing that into krita, which worked fine (i didn’t know you could actually open .psd files in clip stuido ((this typo is so fucking stupid it made me laugh so im leaving it)) and krita, so that’s pretty neat, i wonder if it works the other way around too) but i ran into problems when i tried to convert those layers into frames in an animation. because, like, the layout of the program has the layers displayed in one tab, and the animation timeline in another, like so:

(do u like how im using pictures now, i thought of that yesterday after i published the other post and realized hey, visual reference would probably make my plight a lot easier to understand!! so enjoy these educational diagrams from now on)

so my goal was to get the frames from the layers into the timeline, and i still don’t know if i did it right bc lbr krita is not very intuitive at all,,.,, i mean i watched a video tutorial abt how to animate in krita which was v helpful (it’s the one by jesse j james on yt fuckin SHout out) but it was about animating from scratch, not importing an animation you’ve already done elsewhere

so like, the way krita’s animation thing works, from what i could piece together as i bumbled my way around w/ it, is that each layer in the layers tab is a separate timeline in the,,, timeline tab

i want them all to be in the same timeline, not separate ones, and there’s no way to combine them in the timeline tab bc doing that just overwrites whatever layer you’re pasting it down onto, and also if you define the number of frames for that timeline (62 for this project) it just puts the single image of that layer for all of the frames instead of just one of them, so you’d have to go through and delete all the other frames you don’t want it to be, which would be such a fuckin pain

so i found a workaround, which is so tedious that it can’t be the right way to do it, but basically i started w/ layer 1 and defined 62 frames & then emptied frames 2-62, like this

(that blue box is the frame, btw, even tho it says 0, which actually kind of annoys me like why doesn’t it start the first frame on 1????)

from there i went up to layer two and selected that in the timeline, but for some reason the frame doesn’t show up automatically?

& i couldnt fuckin figure out how to make it into like, an Official Timeline Layer or whatever tf bc like, u see on layer 1 how theres that little lightbulb-looking icon on the right? that’s for turning on onion skin which only applies when you actually have frames with things drawn on them, so basically layer 2 in the layers tab has a drawing but in the timeline it doesn’t?

i didn’t find out what the actual reason for this is or how you’re /supposed/ to make the frame appear in the timeline, but what i did was right click on layer 2′s timeline & select “create blank frame” which magically made the frame i want appear

but it’s on top of the layer 1 frame, and i want it to be the frame after. also it’s still in a different timeline. this is the only easy fix in this whole damn process, u can literally just click & drag the frame from layer 2 to layer 1 and put it wherever u want on the timeline

and then u just delete layer 2 and that’s it, frame transferred!! then i just had to do that for 60 more layers and after [unspecified amount of time but it was a fuckin while ok] my timeline looked like this!

(the gaps near the end are held frames, to save me time so i didn’t have to copy a bunch of frames that were exactly the same)

krita is great because as far as i know ur animation can have an unlimited number of frames, at the risk of your own pc’s processing power, which is a definite upside to SOME expensive art programs i know (clip studio, i’m talking abt csp) and u can pick the frame rate too (cough photoshop elements 5.0 even tho u dont technically have an animation feature & it’s a miracle u can even make gifs at all) so once i finally got all the frames situated all nice and in order like on the same timeline, playing it was great! played at the right speed, looped perfectly, it was a dream come true right

well, time to export it as a gif

ha

haha

hoooo oo  o

so u got 2 options for exporting ur animation, u can either hit “export,” which lets u save it as different file types, one of which being gif, or you can hit “render,” which gives you gif and video options

well

i tried export first, bc that seemed like a good idea, but the “””gif””” it made was distinctly not a gif, despite its claim to be one?? this is what i got:

notice: 1. it is not moving, and 2. the black bars to the sides?? those are supposed to be transparent. they’re transparent in the file i made so why didn’t they register as transparent in the export, when gifs have transparency capabilities??

so That was some real live bullshit but i still had the “render” option, right? export was wrong, so rrender must be the correct option to go to that will produce the results i am wanting to see produced in front of me like a silver dinner platter with a correctly functioning gif under the lid, that’s what i want to see and “Render Animation...” is gonna Give me that silver platter righWRONG ok look at this shit rn ok Look

it says GIF it says it RIGHT THERE right??? right?????? then WHY

?????????????

and it also gave me all This bullshit

like did i ask?? did i fucking ask???? i already have all the individual frames why do i need even M o re i mfjgjgk

((rationally ok yea thats v useful for if ur making the animation in krita and want to export the frames to use elsewhere, but like uhhh 1. again, they’re not transparent & 2. i should have the option of saying i don’t want these??? bc *meme voice* i don’t want these)

so in the end i could find NO correct method of exporting animations as a gif in krita bc every ooption that says gif is fuckign LYING to ur face there are NO gifs in krita, aliens made the progam who looked at gifs and went “hmm i thikng this is how a gif works “ and just made jpegs instead but somehow got on the computers good side and got it to lie for them about it being a gif so thats why it says gif on the file still even tho its not a gif illimati confinr

so what is the conclusion to this? well i said there was good news too, and this is the portion where i divulge that sweet nectar (i type dthis 2 seconds ago and @ me what the fuck)

so after wasting a good 2 hours trying to figure out krita i gave up and watched some good old [youtuber name redacted bc what if it shows up in search & ppl see this dumbass post in there but it rhymes with fjackfsepticfeye] to relax into accepting my fate that i’ll never be able to upload my animations to tungle except in poor quality loopless video form, making me into a laughing stock on my own art blog, but THEN i had a stroke of genius, in my Brain

so if u read yesterday’s post u might remember that flipnote studio, the animation program i use on my ds, to animate, has the option to export files as gifs, both animated and sequential (meaning either as one fully animated gif or each individual frame separately), which is super convenient, but as i mentioned yesterday, any time i tried to open the folder with those files on my laptop, it crashed immediately

WELL today i thought “hey, how about instead of opening the folder in the sd card when it’s plugged in, how about i copy that folder from the sd card to my flash drive, and try to open it there, in case it’s the card’s hardware that’s causing the problem, not corrupted files”

so i tried that and it FUCKING WORKED THANK GOD GLORY HALLELUJAH

so now instead of spedning A THOUSAND YEARS trying and failing to force art programs to bend to my will i can just export the animations straight from my ds and drag them onto my computer Just As God Intended oh GOD im so fucking happy

here’s the gif in the end, i’m gonna post it to my art blog too but this is the Green Version bc i animate in green bc of some default settings in flipnote that i got used to, plus it makes me feel like i’m just sketching so nothing really has to be finalized so i’m comfortable while i work, and also it’s just nice ok it’s a Nice Green

(there’s a few frames at the end that are like the extra scraps from while i was working dw i got rid of those in the final version that i’m posting to my art blog later. also i added my blog url to that one too it’s aaaaaall good)

the only downside to this method is that i can’t change the canvas size to be 540px wide to fit with tumbrl s image dimensions but whatever i can just post them in a text post and fix the html to display it at its original size instead of the resizing bullshit tmurbl pulls constantly ugh. anyway it works great on desktop but it’s inevitably gonna look like shit on mobile no matter what i do *Big Ass Shrug*

anyway thats the end of my success story uhh i can’t make the like comment & subscribe joke again bc i already did that in the last post so like bye i guess thanks 4 watchign & have a great day i’ll see u in my next fvideo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYob4uDjEKI&t=0s

(^that’s my outro music)

[smoketexture]

Hello everyone! These are some tips I wish I had known when I first got into the community. Warning: this got longer than intended, sorry! I tried to divide it into well separated sections, so it’d be easier for you to read only the parts that interest you!

Original content:

I think the best way to get your studyblr known is by posting original content, this can be either pictures of your journal, your notes, your stationery, etc. If you don’t feel like pictures are your thing, you could make advice masterposts or share little tricks and hacks that have helped you through your studies or your life in general.

Take nice pictures: 1) The trick here is to take your pictures near a window where the sun isn’t hitting directly on what you want to photograph (you can try direct sunlight as well, but I think if the sun’s too bright then you won’t be able to see what’s written on white paper). 2) A nice background makes all the difference. I personally prefer white backgrounds, so I just use my desk. BUT if you don’t have any white surfaces, you can create one by just laying down a few sheets of paper (that’s what I did for this post). Lots of people also use their bed sheets or duvets as background and it looks amazing as well! 3) Flatlays seem to be quite popular and they make the picture look very neat, aand you don’t need many photographic skills to pull it off, so I’d say it’s the best choice for taking pictures.

Edit pictures: If you’ve already taken your picture next to a window or in a well lighten environment, then you probably don’t need to edit it all that much (not that you ever have to edit your pictures, but it does make them look a bit more aesthetically pleasing and professional I’d say?). So if you still want to edit them (which I do), then I’d recommend the Snapseed app (available for Apple and Android), that’s the one I use, It’s free and it has a LOT of editing options. I also have the VSCO app (x x), which I downloaded because a lot of people here have recommended it, but I don’t really use it. You can play around with both apps and decide which one works best for you! (Oh and yes, like most of use here, I use my phone to take pictures).

Tag other blogs: Some people track a specific tag (usually their blog url, but not always, in which case they tend to clarify it somewhere in their blog). This is a great way for people to check out your content and then they might share it if they like it. There are some blogs who reblog everything they are tagged in, but I’d say this is the minority. If you’re not sure whether someone tracks their tag, then you can always ask them!

Trends: In the studyblr community there tend to be certain trends, such as a specific type of calligraphy, specific brands, etc. So there’s basically two paths here: You can choose to follow these trends and make your bujo spreads look like most journals look at that moment. This probably will make people reblog your stuff because that’s what everyone’s into. Another option is to go on the exact opposite direction and make your content completely different than everyone else’s in order to make it stand out more. Honestly, I don’t think one way’s better than the other, you’ll slowly figure out what makes you feel happier about your journal/notes. However, DO NOT copy someone else’s work and claim it as your own. You can get inspired by certain styles, yes, but if you replicate something somebody else made, then that’s stealing. That being said, lots of people recreate a bujo spread (for example) and then properly credit the person who originally made it, in which case I think it’s okay, but it’s always safer to ask for permission first.

Masterposts: There’s mainly two ways to make a masterpost: 1) You can make an original one with recommendations or tips you come up with yourself. My advice here would be to think of actually useful tips, do not just write whatever seems like the right thing to say, but instead use your own experience to think of tips that have indeed helped you in the past. 2) If coming up with advice is not your thing, you can gather around other people’s advice and provide links to their posts (they don’t even need to be from Tumblr blogs) in an organized structure that makes it easy for people to skim through and find what they’re looking for! Btw, even if you’re a studyblr, your posts don’t have to be all exclusively study related. There are some really good masterposts about mental health, moving out on your own, meal recipes, etc.

Stay visible:

One of the good things about the studyblr community is that most people won’t unfollow you just because you weren’t active for a certain period of time, we all understand that sometimes life (study related or not) just gets busy and it’s okay to take some time for yourself. BUT at the same time it’s true that in order to get your content around, you need to stay active to a certain extent.

Queue your posts: You can even do some research to find out when it’s the best time of the day to post something and on which days of the week and set your queue to those hours.

Interact with others: This helps to get your blog known AND it’s a great way to meet people in the community! There are loads of ways in which to do this: 1) Simply send someone a message and start a conversation with them, ask them about their day or tell them about yours. 2) Join a network. I’ve never been in one myself (bc shyness hey) but they do sound fun! 3) Try doing other people’s “challenges”, for which they usually provide a tag for you to use so they can check out your posts for the challenge. 4) Tag people in these little games that go around, like this bold tag thingy (I think that’s the only example I have).

Blog aesthetics:

In order to make your blog more appealing, make sure you spend some time on your theme and icon. If they go well together, it will create an organized layout, which tends to catch people’s eyes and make it more likely for them to check out your content.

Theme: The possibilities are endless. Whichever style you prefer, there’s definitely a theme that goes with it. Personally speaking, I love neat, soft-colored themes. I believe organization is key, if your links and information are easily accesible, then that adds up to your blog for sure! Here are a few theme makers whose content I’ve been using lately: @acuite, @cyantists, @felinum, @odeysseus, @pohroro​, @roxiestheme​. In addition, you can find a lot of great themes here: @theme-hunter​ (they even classify the themes by style, post size, etc.).

Icon: This is the door to your blog, people see it on their dash and use it to identify you. Some people make free icons for you to use, but I personally prefer making my own. Don’t worry, you don’t need to be super skilled or even use Photoshop for this. 1) I usually use Canva to make my icons or banners. They have lots of templates for you to use as a guide, or you can start your design from scratch. They do require you to register with an email, but it’s free yay (unless you want to pay for some special designs, but, honestly, their free stuff is more than enough to create whatever you need). 2) Flaticon is another website which provides a TON of icons and pictures that you can use (you do not have to pay to download the images, but you DO have to properly credit whoever made them).

Be consistent: Choose whichever content you’d like to post and stick to it. Not everyone is this picky, but some people only follow blogs whose posts belong to a certain category (studyblr, fandoms, fitness, clothes, etc.). This doesn’t mean you can’t post an occasional random post, though. Don’t restrict yourself, but do try to keep you content consistent.

Balance:

Life’s all about balance. Regarding your studyblr, I think there are mainly two aspects in which you need to apply this.

Studying vs. keeping a blog: Yes, studyblrs can be helpful when it comes to your studies (there is a lot of advice going around and, personally, it helps me to stay motivated and makes me want to do better). However, at the end of the day it’s still a Tumblr blog, which means you can spend hours and hours here without even realizing it, so be careful not to lose yourself in the wonderful journals and unbelievably neat notes that the community has to offer, because then you won’t end up doing any of your work.

Aesthetics vs. functionality: You’ve probably seen those posts which reassure you that your notes & journal are made to increase your productivity so there’s no need for you to make them pretty if that’s not your thing. I’m not going to preach you on that, we all know it’s true. However, It frustrates me a little bit that on that kind of posts, they never seem to acknowledge the fact that some of us spend time making our notes and journals pretty because it’s actually helpful for us. I’m less likely to want to study from my notes if they’re all messy and lifeless, so I spend time on them. Regarding my journal, whether I keep it extremely simple or make it super fancy and decorated, it would serve its purpose either way. BUT, spending time decorating my journal is what helps me unwind at the end of the week. So, no, I don’t spend time on my journal because that’s going to help me achieve my goals, I spend time on it because it helps me to relax and get away from the world for a little while. Not everything we do needs to have an academic purpose.

Hope you can take some advice from this and that you all have a lovely day! 🌿

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho and Wyoming. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho and Wyoming. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho and Wyoming. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho and Wyoming. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho and Wyoming. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[fesahaawit]

10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally

Good morning, friends! I read three posts this week that I want to share with you. The first was written by author Matt Haig back in 2015, but I only found it recently and it is still so timely. A note that it talks about depression and suicide, but there’s one quote in particular that resonated with me: “Christmas is one of those times when the idea of something doesn’t match the reality.” It is absolutely worth reading all the way through to the end.

The second post is from my friend Bianca who wrote quite honestly about why it’s time we removed the pressure around Christmas. If you’re seeing a bit of a trend here, it’s true that I’m still not in my usual Christmas spirit. I can echo what Bianca wrote: I love the lights! And the food! And I plan to take some days off! So I feel generally ok about the holiday season. It just doesn’t feel very “special,” and I’m starting to realize that is also ok.

In an attempt to remove some of the pressure around it here on this blog, there is just one thing I want to say before I log off for a few days: thank you. Thank you for being so caring and supportive this year—and not just to me but also to each other. We’ve talked about some heavy stuff here this year, and I am so grateful that this space is one that continues to remain open and safe. Thank you for being part of it.

The last post I want to share was written by Daisy for No Sidebar. In it, she shared 10 questions we could answer to end the year intentionally. This isn’t about goal-setting or trying to come up with resolutions or anything else future-thinking. It’s just a simple exercise that can help you reflect on the past year. For everything that’s happened, that felt right for me, so I answered the questions and am sharing them here.

I’m signing off for a week! In that time, I plan to complete a 1,000-piece puzzle, start and finish a new book, and spend two nights in a house on the ocean with some of my family. There’s no cell service and definitely no internet. If I could wish anything for you right now, it would be to unplug for a day—and just be. xo

1. What makes this year unforgettable?

Admittedly, I feel like I am always going to remember 2017 as the year we lost the girls. But I’m also going to remember it as the year I moved to Squamish and finally let myself settle in. Slowing down and letting myself really “be” somewhere came with its own challenges—namely that I could no longer manage my anxiety by hopping around from place-to-place, and instead had to make the decision to deal with it and do some therapy. But it also came with so many bonuses. On top of the beautiful landscapes, I found a community of creative, honest, and vulnerable women I feel so fortunate to now call my friends.

2. What did you enjoy doing this year?

Oddly, I really enjoyed not travelling much. It felt good to get to know my new home, create some routine and learn a few trails like the back of my hand. I also made time to read more books this year, which felt good too. :)

3. What/who is the one thing/person you’re grateful for?

A few people come to mind right away, but I’m going to say that I’m grateful I had the money and resources available to start therapy. For the first two months, I was going weekly which was costing $520-$650 monthly. That was obviously not a regular line item in my budget, and isn’t something I would currently be able to afford to do for an extended period of time. But having my emergency fund made me feel comfortable enough to make that decision back in April and I am so grateful for it. I never would’ve imagined that having savings would’ve been so important for my mental health, and there is no doubt that therapy has changed my life.

4. What’s your biggest win this year?

Aside from the personal growth, it would be remiss of me to not mention the fact that I wrote my first book this year! A real book! One that will be in stores in just a few weeks! (And that you still have three weeks to get the bonuses if you pre-order a copy!) There were so many lessons to take away from writing this book, but one of the most important was that it is possible to complete a big creative project. On the day I submitted the first (crappy) draft, I had this overwhelming sense of I CAN DO ANY CREATIVE PROJECT I WANT TO wash over me. I can’t imagine any writing project feeling bigger or being more all-consuming than a book. Now, I’ve written one. So, I can do anything . . . right? ;)

5. What did you read/watch/listen to that made the most impact this year?

What an amazing question. I’ll start by saying that, without question, my new favourite author is Matt Haig. The most meaningful book I read this year was Reasons to Stay Alive, which came recommended by many of you when I first shared how bad my anxiety had gotten. So thank YOU for telling me about that book, my friends. More recently, I got my hands on a copy of How to Stop Time, which doesn’t even come out in North America until February 6, 2018! It was one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I’ve read in a long time—and Benedict Cumberbatch is going to play the main character in the movie adaptation! How exciting for the author. :)

Aside from books, I have listened to every episode of a handful of podcasts: Hurry Slowly, Secrets of Wealthy Women, The Slow Home Podcast (I did an interview with Brooke earlier this month that was so lovely!), Super Soul Conversations and Terrible, Thanks for Asking. That last one cracked me wide open, but I needed it.

As far as what I’ve watched that’s had an impact . . . nothing comes to mind. I enjoyed a few shows: 13 Reasons Why, Atypical, The Crown and The Great British Bake Off. But I can’t say that anything had an impact. This is something I’ve thought about a lot lately. Let’s talk about it in the new year. For now, books and podcasts win!

6. What did you worry about most and how did it turn out?

Honestly, I worried about how moving away from Victoria would affect the dogs—and two months later, we lost them both. So, I wish I could say that my worries weren’t warranted, and set an example for how/why it’s important to calm our anxious thoughts. But truthfully, March, April and May were really tough months for me.

7. What was your biggest regret and why?

I don’t regret moving, obviously, but I still feel guilty about leaving the girls. I know that’s something I had no control over. It’s just how I feel; like my leaving somehow prompted the beginning of the end for them. This is something I’m obviously still working through (and might help you understand why I’m still emotional about it).

8. What’s one thing that you changed about yourself?

One of the things that became apparent very early on in therapy was that I had zero boundaries in my life. I basically did anything and everything that would make other people’s lives easier, and put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own. This was true in all of my relationships and it wasn’t healthy. In fact, it was one of the reasons my anxiety got so out of control. Thankfully, I’ve been learning how to set healthier boundaries in all areas of my life. It’s not always easy and I sometimes still let guilt takeover (this article on The Pool is another good read on that topic). But I have set some boundaries, and chosen to put myself first in some ways, and it does feel better.

9. What surprised you the most this year?

Most of this post has felt heavy, so I’m going to share a few fun/random things!

I was surprised to find myself driving across the US, from Minneapolis to BC, for the second time in a year! (And I never thought I would drive through South Dakota again, let alone twice in one year!)

I was surprised to randomly meet up with Sarah and spend two days together in Idaho. That’s some travelling big magic, right there. :)

I was surprised to meet my two closest friends in Squamish on Instagram—and learn that one lives right behind me, and that I can see the other’s house through the trees between our two homes!

I was really surprised to find Cheryl Strayed followed me on both Twitter and Instagram! I still don’t know how or why . . . but yea, consider me still surprised! (Let’s not jinx it.)

And I was happily surprised to find myself picking up and reading more fiction this year. It felt really good to fall in love with characters and get lost in a story.

10. If you could go back to last January 1, what suggestions would you give your past self?

If I had known what was going to happen in 2017, at the start of the year, I wouldn’t have believed it—and I wouldn’t have wanted to believe it. I don’t have a suggestion, per se, but more of a reminder: You will never regret telling people/pets how you feel, showing them affection and making sure they feel your love. When they are gone, the only thing you’ll wish is that you’d had more time together. So I would say . . . don’t rush off. Spend your time with those who matter most. Because there’s never enough of it.

  10 Questions to End the Year Intentionally posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ