#its absolutely nowhere near the canon

[lovekenney]

How I feeling knowing the image of a house (trailer actually) that I get when reading fics is not even close to what it looks in the canon.

[mooooonnnzz]

Dad!ford head canons plzzz

Who Knows How Long I Loved You

Stanford Pines x child/teen!reader

✧ stanford raising you from baby to teen!

✧ takes place in the 80's so its young stanford

✧ gender neutral reader!

✧ 3,1k words

✧ i got so carried away with writing that i deviated from hc and made it to a full blown story so i had to cut it

✧ there will be a part2 and it's gonna be angsty!!

✧ requests are still open!

❤︎ Rapid eager knocks resounded in his shack. Ford jolted awake, completely lost in a sleepy haze. He looked around hurriedly as he slowly woke up, eyes blinking slowly. He let out a low groan as he ran a hand down his face. His hand stopped halfway to get caught in a piece of paper that stuck to his cheek. He grimaced in disgust. He was probably drooling in his sleep and made the mistake to fall asleep on his paperwork. Ripping off the paper off his cheek, he leans back in his chair. With sleep still clouding his mind, he forgot about the knocks on his door. That was until another chorus of knocks rang out. Throwing his head back, he sighed a long sigh. Standing up from his chair, he stumbled out of his office while adjusting his glasses that were lopsided on his face.

❤︎ Approaching the front door, he swung it open. The harsh cold wind of December swooped in the shack. A chill ran down Ford’s body as he hugged himself for warmth. “Hello?�� He called out, looking out into the white beyond in search of the person who was knocking on his door. To his surprise, there was no one there. Only footprints that were deeply embedded into the snow that lead out into the woods. Shrugging, Ford began to close the door. A quiet coo of a baby reached Ford’s ear and he abruptly stopped moving. Peeking his head out of the door, his eyes trailed down to his porch and there laid a little baby wrapped in a thin cloth. His mouth hung open in shock. Who would leave a baby out in the middle of a snowstorm? Taking another look around the shack, he couldn’t find or see anyone near. Kneeling down to the floor, he pushed the door to open it a little more. He reached out for the baby slowly. He was so unsure of whatever was happening to him. What is going on? Where is the mother of this child? Who would dare to abandon a baby? Nonetheless, this deep into the woods!

❤︎ His grabs onto the baby and awkwardly shuffles them around his arms. For one last final time, he looks around to again find no one. Closing the door, he looked down to the baby that was cradled in his arms. The baby gave a toothless smile to Ford and his heart melted right then and there. Shaking his head, he told himself he wasn’t going to get attached to you. He had no time to take care of a child and with his line of work, it would be too dangerous as well.

❤︎ That night, he spent his time scanning a book that was filled with every resident’s of Gravity Falls phone number, dialing each number. He asked around, wondering if anyone was in search of a missing baby. Each call led him nowhere. Everyone either had no clue on what he was talking about or didn’t even bother to answer his call. He slammed the phone back down on the receiver, cursing under his breath. Taking care of a child, especially a baby is tough work and Ford wasn’t going to leave this baby on another person’s porch. Rubbing his temples with his thumbs, he could feel the starting aches of a headache brew inside his skull. This is going to stunt his research. Walking over to his room, he saw the baby sleeping peacefully on his bed. “Are babies even allowed to sleep on a bed like this?” He asks himself. Seeds of doubt and concern began to grow in his head and before he knew it, he was researching absolutely everything about taking care of a child.

❤︎ Ultimately, he made the decision to keep you. He trusted no one to take care of you and the only person who was suited to take care of you was your mother and she abandoned you on his doorstep, which practically left him no other choice but to take you in as his own. The first few months were extremely taxing on him. He thought he’d be able to leave and finally take his research outside of the shack once the winter bled into spring, but it was like you knew when he left, because the moment he stepped out of the shack; you were bursting into tears. Your heartbroken sobs could be heard all around the woods! And feeding you was another task, he didn’t know what foods to properly feed you since he had no baby food stocked up in his shelves. He would’ve gone out to get some if it wasn’t for the horrid snowstorm that encased him inside. He resorted to feeding you bland mash potatoes, which took you awhile to warm up to. There many times where you slapped away his hand, splattering potato goo all over the walls. But once the spoon entered your mouth, you were suddenly crazy about the potatoes. Even seeing Ford making the potatoes made you babble excitedly. That held you over and once the winter was over, he was able to go out and get you baby food. Although, he had to get a baby carrier and hoist you on his chest once he learned you hated being left alone.

❤︎ There’d be nights where he would lie awake in his bed, thoughtlessly staring up at the ceiling. The only noise that was heard in his room was the soft deep breaths you took in your sleep and the occasional creek of your crib that Ford rocked with his hand. He laid there, basking in the comforting feeling that blanketed his body. He’s never felt so much peace before. How could a baby change so much in his life in only a matter of a few months? His head turned over to you, eyes landing on you. He felt his heart clench in adoration for you, something he’d never thought he would feel in over a million of years. Kids were never in the equation for him, but the sudden addition of you in his life made the grueling journey of his a little more worthwhile.

❤︎ Teaching you how to speak was such a delightful experience for him. He’d start his lessons by sitting you up on his bed with a few pillows behind you to support you. Then, with a pile of flashcards he made himself, he would point at the object, fruit, ect and sound it out. At first, you’d cock your head to the side curiously, babbling about something before falling to your knees and crawling towards Ford. No matter how many times you’d look at him with a blank confused expression on your face, he would still laugh equally as hard as he did the first time. When you started catching on and attempting to sound the words out with him, Ford would beam so brightly and swoop you in his arms and babble on how you’re so smart.

❤︎ “Okay, kiddo. What does the cow say?” Ford asks. You clapped your chubby little hands together, mouth opening and closing as you stared at Ford with a smile. Ford laughs, motioning to the picture of a cow in hand. “Don’t look at me,” using his pointer finger, he moved your head toward the index card. “Look at the card.” He points at it. “What is that on the card, kiddo?” You look at the card. “C-Cow!” You said. Ford erupted in a gleeful cheer. “Yes! Good job.” He has such a proud dad smile on his face. “You’re such a smart kid, you know that?”

❤︎ He never thought he’d enjoy looking for baby clothes. The prospect of buying kids clothes sounded boring and mundane. He thought he would buy a few articles of clothing and call it a day, but it’s been over an hour since he entered the baby store and he’s been looking at cute clothes and throwing them in the cart. “What do you think, kid? You like the shoes?” He placed the baby shoes on top of your little feet. You mindlessly babbled in response and he took that as a yes. “Great! I like them too.” He put the shoes inside the growing cart full of clothes, shoes and accessories. He would stand in front of a mirror and hold out a onesie and put it in front of you, ask if you liked it and if you responded with incoherent babbles that was a yes, but if you just stared at him that was a no. So far, you’ve been saying yes to everything he showed you. Once the cart started to get overloaded with baby items, he decided to purchase his findings. While putting the clothes down for the worker to scan, they sprouted a conversation with Ford. “First time being a dad?” Ford froze in his tracks, the word Dad circling around his head. Was he a Dad? Does this make him a Dad? He looked down at you and you looked up at him with a smile. He looked over to the cashier. With a hesitant nod, he said, “Y-Yeah. I’m a first time Dad.” The cashier smiled at him. “Enjoy the baby phase while it lasts, they grow up too fast.”

❤︎ And grow up you did. You were no longer a baby who yelled random gibberish. You were now a well renowned 5 year old! Speeding down the halls and causing trouble wherever your child's heart chose to wreak havoc. Ford had to swoop in and take you away from whatever device you were messing with before you broke it. “What did I tell you about messing with things that aren’t yours?” He said, placing you down on the sofa where all your toys and crayons reside. “Not to touch,” You said, grumpily crossing your arms over your chest. “Right, so why do you keep doing the opposite of that?” He crossed his arms over his chest as well, raising a curious brow. “Because I want to be like you! I want to play with them.” You puffed out your cheeks, staring down your shoes with a glare. “But those aren’t toys, kiddo. They’re very dangerous.” He tells you, ruffling your hair. “When you’re older I’ll let you touch my devices,” He says. “And maybe…you can build one of your own?” That piqued your interest and your attitude melted away and turned into happiness. “Really?!” You looked at him with stars in your eyes. “Yes, really.”

❤︎ Adventures out in the forests are way more entertaining now that you’re older. Back then, all you did was sit in a strap on a baby carrier and ogle at the pretty little things. Now, you can comment on things and show off your findings to Ford. “Dad!” You called out, picking up a flower from the ground. “Look at this!” You run towards him, waving the flower up in the air. He smiles, kneeling down to your height. No matter how many times you say it, he could never get used to you calling him Dad. “What is it?” He has his book flipped open to a new page, pencil ready in hand to draw the new discovery and its properties. “It’s a flower that makes you sparkly, look!” You shook the flower over your arm and little twinkling specs of glitter floated down to your arm. “Forever glitter!” You cheered, spinning around in a glittery tornado. Ford laughed at your silly antics, drawing you in the mess of sparkly glitter in his book.

❤︎ There’s books filled with drawings of you and little entries of things you did that Ford thought was worthy to write down to remember. Various cute little photos were plastered on the pages and on nights where he’s busy in the lab, for a quick break, he’d open the books and revisit the memories and photos of baby you to ground himself.

❤︎ The fridge is stamped with many drawings you've scribbled down on a paper with crayons. Even though they're not the best, in his eyes they are masterpieces. Especially the crudely drawn version of you and him holding hands with the words 'Happy Father's Day' messily written on top. He finds your messy writing so cute and he has a small little debate with himself whether he should help you practice your handwriting or keep it the way as it is.

❤︎ Since you were homeschooled, you didn’t have friends really. At first, Ford wanted to build you little robot friends. He was seriously on board with the whole idea but what stopped him was the idea of you going out one day, for whatever reason and being incapable of talking to humans because you were so used to talking to robots. That sent an uneasy chill down his spine. So whenever he’d have the time, he would take you and him out to parks where you were able to socialize with kids. Ford feared you’d be bullied like how he was for being so shy and quiet, but you were carefree and talking to so many kids Ford couldn’t believe it. At the end of it, you made a few friends that stuck around for a quiet long time.

❤︎ "Dad, what is that?" You point to the gnome that stood perfectly still on top of the table. Ford jumps in surprise. He was so wrapped up in his drawing of the gnome, he failed to realize you were creeping up to him. "Hey, sweetie." He greets. "Do you want a closer look?" He looks over to you, jerking his head to the gnome. "Yes!" You cheered. Setting his book and pencil aside, he picks you up and sits you down on the table. "This is a gnome." He tells you. "His name is Schmebulock." You reach your hand out towards gnome. "Can we keep it?!" You eagerly ask, grabbing the gnomes hat. "No can do, kiddo." He flicks your hand away from the gnome. "And be gentle." He softly scolds you. "Can he talk?" You poke the gnome. "Can you talk gnome!" The gnome turns over to you and blurts out. "Schmebulock!" Your head jolts back in shock. "Is he supposed to say that?"

❤︎ Ford never knew when exactly you were born so he decided to celebrate your birthday one the day you appeared on his doorstep. You knew that Ford wasn’t biologically your Dad, but you didn’t have to be related to him by blood to be called your father. Your birthday’s were spent doing whatever you wanted. He’d wake you up in the morning with your favorite breakfast and blast one of your favorite songs. While scarfing down your breakfast, he would ask you what you wanted to do for your birthday and whatever you replied back with was what you and he did. An adventure in the woods? Done! Spending the day rotting away watching TV together? Done! Anything you wanted, he’d grant you. He never truly took account of what that cashier said all those years ago until you turned 17. He would never admit it to you, but he cried a lot more than he’d like to say. In a flurry of tears, he wrote in his journal on how heartbroken he was. The page was stained with a bunch of tears. But who could blame him? His baby was all grown up! If only he cherished those days a little more.

❤︎ Trips to the mall was a frequent outing you an him partook on days off. "What am I spending all my money on today?" Ford may act like he dreads the times where you strip him dry of all his money, but in actuality, he loves surprising you with the things he told you no to. "Dad, can I get this?" And it's a cute little plushie you found while venturing into the store. Ford does his best to play up a very stern Dad act. Pursing his lips into a thin line, he shakes his head no. Defeated and ultimately disappointed you walk back to the shelf with your head hung low. It's not when you come back that you see the very exact same plush in his hands. "Oh!" He feigns shock. "How did that get here?"

❤︎ Another thing he'll never admit is that he doesn't like when you go off with your friends for hours. Up until you reached your mid teenage years, you and him were glued to the hip. Partners in crime if you asked him! And being alone in the shack is so reality shifting that he can't bring himself to do anything but lock himself in the lab until you come back. Anything reminds him of you and all he could do is stare somberly at them before burying his head in a book of his. "Dad?" You enter the shack, closing the door behind you. It's quiet, too quiet. Heading down the shack you found him asleep on a book. You couldn't see much since his head was laying on it, obscuring most of the text but what you were able to see was a drawing of baby you wearing his glasses. "Oh, Dad..." Your hand lays on his back and his body visibly relaxes. Since that day, you vowed to yourself to never stay out for long with your friends.

❤︎ “Being your father has been one of the best things that has happened to me.” Ford randomly admits on one summer evening. “You’re so sappy.” You reply, stretching yourself on the couch you’ve conquered as your own since this morning. Ford grabs you by the ankles and lifts them up, allowing himself to sit down on the couch. “Hey! Who said we were sharing.” You jokingly protested. He gets himself comfortable on the couch and rests your legs on his lap. “I said,” He looks over to you, just like how he always did when you were a baby and were sleeping soundly in your crib. Only this time you were no longer a sleeping baby. “But I mean it, kiddo. You’re one of my greatest achievements.” He says, patting your legs. A wobbly smile pulls to your face. You never truly say it out loud, but everyday you thank whatever force that pulled him to take you in.  “Now what’s on TV?” He asks himself, turning his attention to the TV. “Where did you put the remote?” Before he could begin fully searching for the remote, he gets attacked by a hug. “I love you, Dad.” You whisper, hugging him tightly. “I love you more, kiddo.”

[yanderefarm]

vampire's pet finding out we got a new pet?

silvan getting jealous

cw;; angst, blood drinking mentioned, vampires, violence mentioned

i feel like silvan's just an angst magnet. of course you're a cool powerful vampire you're entitled to have multiple pets. it's just going to absolutely destroy silvan's heart and self esteem. but dw its not canon.

it wasn't unusual for a vampire to have multiple pets, many lower rank vampires would try to use multiple pets to boost their status. it was just unusual for you. you had avoided getting a pet for almost a millennium and now you were getting a second? even your underlings found it surprising and unusual.

silvan hated their concerned eyes boring into his skin as he walked through the halls. every servant in the manor stared at him with a weird sense of pity. it was especially bad when he would ask where you were and he could tell you were with the other one based on the maid's down turned eyes. he wanted to run to you and pull your new pet out of your arms but he knew that if he dared to act out it would only go to show you how undesirable he really was. so silvan kept his head down.

he was wandering the halls aimlessly, nowhere to go since you were with the other one. he didn't even notice that he had headed to your office on instinct until he was standing in front of the door. he would just look at you once he figured, your powerful visage should be enough to satisfy him for a while. his plan was foiled.

"what are you doing?" your voice called from beside him.

silvan shrank in front of your office door. "...i was.. looking.. for you...?"

he heard the giggle of your other pet. his stomach hurt like that little sound had just punched him full force. he couldn't bring himself to turn his head, he didn't want to see how close you were to the other one.

"im here. do you need something?" you sounded so nonchalant like you weren't actively ripping his heart out. it sucked that only made you seem cooler.

'don't ask if he's hungry, don't ask if he's hungry, don't ask if he's hungry' silvan's mind screamed at him. unfortunately his tongue didn't get the message. "are you hungry, master?"

god damnit.

"hm. i suppose." your words finally drew silvan to look at you, hope in his eyes.

that hope was immediately crushed when he saw your new pet hanging on your arm. there were obvious fresh teeth marks in his skin along his neck and arm. you didn't bite into silvan's arm usually. were you so insatiable that you had to bite him over and over again? the sick feeling in silvan's stomach felt worse.

"come along." you walked past him, pushing your office open. that one was right behind you.

silvan didn't know if you were talking to him, if you were then this was probably going to result in punishment. but he couldn't stand being near that one another minute. he ran past you. he ran until his muscles burned. he ran until he couldn't breathe anymore.

when he finally collapsed he found himself on his hands and knees in front of the front gate. his lungs were burning and he couldn't even cry because he was busy gasping for air. suddenly, lightning cracked across the cloudy sky as rain began pouring down. silvan shivered in the cold as his clothes were getting drenched. fighting against his own screaming muscles he forced himself to stand up.

he stared at the gate in front of him, the temptation of freedom right in front of him. you might not even chase him with your new pet having all your attention. but even with you hurting his heart like you were he could never leave you. he could never hate you. you were the only one who ever gave him a reason to live. without you why should he even bother? if you were truly sick of him like he thought you were then he would simply wait for you to come kill him. maybe not tonight. maybe not tomorrow. but someday you would be the only thing that granted him freedom by freeing his head from his useless body. with a heavy heart he shivered as he turned away from the gate instead dragging himself to the greenhouse nearby.

[polakina]

on his knees for you

pairing: javier escuella x reader

rating: mature

outline: a robbery goes sideways, and your already rocky friendship with a fellow camp mate is put to the test as you evade the guards of Van Horn

warnings: cursing, so much bickering, canon-typical gore and violence, flirting, slightly suggestive (this is by far the tamest thing i've ever written)

requests are open! hope you enjoy, petals <3

a/n: i can't believe how many notifications i've gotten about my works over the past week. its fucking crazy. thank you so much, you're all absolute stars

masterlist

II

It was a simple job, really. Get in, steal the bonds, and get out.

But nothing ever went as simple as the original plan, did it? Not with the Van Der Linde gang. There was always a little bit of improvisation to be had. Which was exactly what you were doing right now.

Bullets firing past your ears, blood running down your leg, the target’s personal guards chasing you down the winding paths of Roanoke Ridge.

-

One day earlier.

The plan was set. Arthur, Bill and Lenny were to infiltrate the building and steal the bonds, while Micah and Charles handled the guards. You and Javier were on lookout, posted at the entrance gates. 

You were all stationed just outside of Van Horn, your target being the mansion and its occupiers. Trelawny had brought intel of bonds on their way through Van Horn to Annesburg, stopping off at the mansion overnight. Roanoke wasn’t a place anyone wanted to be caught up in at night.

“It’s fucking freezing out here,” you muttered, leaning further against your horse, absorbing his body heat as much as you could. It had been hours of waiting around and checking on the mansion. No movement whatsoever since the sun began to set. Darkness was nearing and the coach was nowhere to be seen.

Javier stood beside you, rifle in hand, eyes fixated on the road to the right, where the coach should appear from. “Want my poncho?” He asked, glancing at you briefly.

You didn’t even cast him a look as you responded. “Wouldn’t want to ruin your style, Escuella. I think I’ll survive without it.” You sighed, and moved from your position, heading further down the road, hiding in the trees to watch from a different position, seeing the road winding down Roanoke Ridge to New Hanover.

The two of you had never gotten along. He didn’t like your attitude one bit. You were snarky, cold. Something you’d developed after years of running with Arthur and John. He’d try and make conversation, you’d brush it off. He’d invite you on a fishing or hunting trip, you’d decline and say you preferred to hunt alone. He couldn’t win. You never sat with the camp during his songs or meals, you were always perched somewhere else, keeping lookout. That’s what you did. That’s all you ever did. 

So after a few months, he gave up. Not exactly understanding your harshness to him, he just accepted it instead. He returned your cold comments and your mean stares. Years passed and you bickered like enemies living beside one another. 

You whistled out to the group as you spotted the coach. Your whistle blended with the birds, so it was undetected by the gourds watching the bonds.

Everything went smoothly, Arthur, Lenny and Bill making quick work of breaking into the bonds lock box, and you heard the guards grunting and groaning as they hit the floor from Micah and Bill’s attacks.

Through your scope, you spotted as the boys grabbed the bonds, throwing them into their satchels. Drifting your rifle along the side of the mansion, you sensed something wrong with Bill. He was arguing with Micah. More so than usual. 

“What’s going on?” Javier whispered, lying beside you, hidden between the trees.

You shushed him, focusing on Bill. Their argument grew even more heated, and you caught a glimpse of lantern light behind them. You watched as they turned, cursing loudly before returning fire. Micah had scurried off during the brawl with the guards, seeking other treasures and getting himself caught in a scuff with guardsmen minding their own business.

“Shit, shit,” Javier cursed, throwing an arm over you and holding you down, protecting your head as bullets fired your way. “He can’t keep his head for one mission, puta madre!”

Arthur had ordered for, if the mission went south; which you had good money on it that it did, that you scatter. Split up and evade Van Horn at all costs, go the long way around New Hanover until it was safe to return back to camp so you were sure you weren’t followed. 

They had the bonds, all they needed to do was escape without getting caught. But you wouldn’t have minded if Micah got murdered in the. Just when you thought he’d found your last nerve, he managed to hit another one.

“I think this is our cue to leave,” you said through gritted teeth, pushing yourself onto your feet and grabbing your gear. Javier was on your heels, close behind. You hiked deeper into Murfree Brood territory, constantly keeping an eye over your shoulders for lantern light.

“Our safest path is through Roanoke,” Javier said from behind you, following your path through the trees. “The guards won’t dare follow us through there this late at night.”

You halted suddenly, whipping around to face Javier. He was caught off guard, almost stumbling into you, a surprised expression on his face. “Are you crazy, Escuella? Murfree Brood hunt here at night. If it’s not the guards who get us, it’ll be them. And I’d rather take my chances with bullets rather than-”

A bullet shot through the wind, straight through your leg into the tree behind you. It caught your words in your throat and you almost crumbled to the ground under the pain firing down your leg. Javier didn’t even blink as he wrapped an arm around you, catching you before you fell. He pulled his gun from its holster at his hip, pointing it over your shoulder and firing it straight into the head of the guard who fired at you first.

It drew attention. Of course, it did. Javier pulled you away from the scene, down the winding path leading to New Hanover. His arm stayed firmly around your waist, and you tried to hold in your groans of pain as your feet collided with uneven terrain, worsening the sting of the wound.

You both heard voices, coming from the top of the hill of which you had just descended. Javier pulled you around a large oak tree, pushing your body against the bark which pulled a pained gasp from your lips. “Fucking hell, Javier. At least try to be gentler with-” His hand clamped over your mouth, his body pressed against yours as he looked past the tree trunk to the guards making their way past you, checking their surroundings as they went. 

“You need to learn to shut up once in a while,” he whispered, looking back to you. His hat was tipped down his head, shielding his eyes. “I’m trying to save you and you’re still complaining.”

You looked up at him, your mouth still firmly covered, your hand wrapped around his wrist, instinct from when he shut you up. He smelled of whiskey and firewood, his scent filling your nostrils. His hand wrapped around your waist protectively, tightening as the footsteps grew closer.

Pulling his hand down, you noticed his skin never left yours. It rested around your neck. Softly, no pressure in his fingers, but the heat of his palm burned against your pulse, and he felt your heart rate jump. “Thought you would have wanted to get rid of me, Escuella,” you whispered, looking up at him. 

But he just looked down at you, surprised. “What?”

“Get rid of me. Hand me off to some guards searching through half the woods for us.” Your gaze never wavered. “Would certainly save you the trouble of dealing with me back at camp.”

He just smirked, tilting his head up, his eyes turned down to look at you. “And why would I want to get rid of you? Perhaps I enjoy the trouble you cause me. Ever thought about that?” His eyebrows raised as you stood there, unable to form words. “So are you going to  shut up and behave yourself while I get you out of here? Or are you going to keep talking until they figure out where we are?”

Javier waited for your response, but it never came. You just bowed your head, sealing your lips in a thin line. He took that as a sign that you’d ‘shut up and behave’. 

The men eventually left, abandoning their search for you, leaving both you and Javier a window of opportunity to flee.

-

The sun poked out above the trees from the makeshift camp Javier had set up in New Hanover. You were shielded by the canopy of branches, the fire in front of you keeping you warm. But it wasn’t doing anything good for the bullet wound in your leg. You stretched out your leg, wincing at the pain shooting through your body.

“I told you not to try and fix it by yourself,” you heard Javier say as he emerged with an armful of firewood, dropping it by your bags. “Your hands will shake before you’ve finished stitching it.”

You glared up at him. “Would you suggest I just leave it? Cut my leg off?”

Javier rolled his eyes at you, kneeling in front of you, his knees on either side of your wounded leg. “I would suggest…that you should wait for me. I’ll stitch it for you.”

Pulling his knife from the holster at his ankle, he sliced the blade through the fabric of your pant leg like butter. All the way up to your hip. “Hey!” You called out. “They were new pants.”

“I’ll buy you a replacement. Now shut up.” He was always harsh with his words, but now, it was even more so. A slight pang of worry soaked his tone.

“You’re such an ass sometimes-ow!” His fingers pushed against the wound on your leg, blood pooling out to the floor. “The fuck was that for?”

He looked indifferent as he looked up at you. “Feeling for any shrapnel. You don’t have any, thankfully, or else this would have hurt a lot more than its about to.”

“I could have told you that,” you grimaced as he began cleaning the wound. Applying pressure to one end of the bullet hole only forced blood through the other side. You could see both the entry point and exit point of the wound, stretching across the left and right sides of your leg.

You were both silent as he cleaned your leg, but you gasped as he pulled out a needle. He saw a panicked flash across your face, seeing it appear as quickly as it fled. “Easy,” he soothed, patting your knee. “I’ll be quick. You won’t feel it.”

“Don’t lie to me,” you whispered, your eyes only focused on the needle.

He sighed, leaning closer, tipping your chin up to meet his softened gaze. “Okay. You will feel it. But not much. A bee sting, that’s all it feels like. But it’ll be easier if you lie down.”

“Why?”

“Your muscles tense when you sit upright. You could at least be comfortable while I stitch you up.” He helped you into a more comfortable position. Javier still straddled your shin, one of his hands pressed against your thigh while his other stitched the hole closed. You laid there, his poncho acting as your pillow as you looked up at the trees.

You ignored the sting you felt each time the needle pierced your skin. Javier wasn’t wrong, it did feel like a bee sting. What’s more important, was that you could manage that sort of pain. “Thank you,” you said quietly, but you weren’t certain he heard you at first, until the needle stopped in your skin, his actions immoveable. Lifting your head and straining your neck, you met his eye. There was a small smile on his face, the corners of his moustache turned upwards with his laugh lines driven deep into his skin. You always did like his smile. That was the one thing that never changed about him. 

“It’s the least I can do,” he smiled, turning his attention back to your stitches. “It’s sort of my fault you got shot in the first place.”

“Sort of? You mean ‘entirely’?” You laughed as he playfully slapped your other leg with the back of his hand.

“Quit laughing,” he chuckled with you. “Or I’ll end up stabbing you in the wrong place.”

He finished quickly, wiping away any trace of blood before gently bandaging your leg. His soft touch lingered for a little while, his thumb gently rubbing soothing patterns into your skin. Your breath stopped in your throat as his touch rose higher. Higher up your thigh. To where your thigh met your hip. He was so fixated on it, he didn’t realise what he was doing until he felt your pulse beating at an ungodly rate at the top of your inner thigh.

His eyes flicked up to yours, where you laid, patiently. You were curious what sorts of thoughts were running through his head right now. What sort of cogs were turning in that brain of his.

You pushed yourself up onto your elbows, your face closer to his than it had ever been before. “What?” You coaxed, too curious to keep quiet now.

“Nothing,” he moved to lean back, his hands drifting down your thighs, but they never left your body before you grabbed the front of his shirt, holding him in place.

“What did I say? Don’t lie to me, Javier.” Your voice never raised above a whisper. It didn’t need to. You were so close a whisper felt like a shout.

He didn’t respond. He couldn’t speak. The close proximity had rendered him faulty in speech. So instead he closed the gap. His lips touched yours, his body melting against your touch. You didn’t expect it. All those years of bickering. All those years of cruel comments and nasty looks. Nothing prepared you for this. But you welcomed it.

Javier leaned you back, your head meeting the poncho  as you felt his body settle on top of yours. Breaking away for air, you saw a softened, kinder look in his eye when he looked at you. “Is this your apology for me getting shot?” You asked, smiling against his lips as he kissed you once more.

“Is it working?” His lips moved to your neck, hovering above your skin to a point where it tickled.

“Hmm…maybe.” 

“Then perhaps I’ll try a different angle,” he smirked, unbuttoning your pants, encapturing your lips in a soft kiss, his tongue slipping into your mouth. He had a lot of making up to do.

[brotherwtf]

i love how it’s already canon in the fandom that bucky’s openly feral & buck’s secretly feral. how’d u think bucky would react to knowing that buck’s actually deep down this way & how’d u think buck would react to bucky knowing? also, what situations do you think would bring out buck’s feral side?

loads of love to you! xx

omg feral Buck and Bucky bout to make ME feral I love them so much

Gale would go to the ends of the earth for John, literally lay down his life if it meant John would be happy. there's a silent devotion to John that Gale can't quite place, only knows that it makes him absolutely feral and psycho for John. While John is loud and physical and brash, Gale is quiet and manipulative and cold

thinking about Gale having a way with words that just makes anyone bend to his whim, while John may be charming and charismatic, Gale knows exactly what words to say to make people do what he wants. John eventually finds this out and it makes him absolutely bonkers that Gale is actually just as feral as he is just far more quiet about it

it's obvious when John is being feral and protective, he will launch himself off buildings or go on suicide missions or goad someone into punching him or hurting him or physically shove someone off of Gale, everyone knows when John has been pushed to the edge

I think for Gale it's a little different. the things that make him feral are different from John. While a misplaced hand may result in John wrenching the offender away from Gale, the same makes Gale slide over to the offender, whispering something in his ear about how John Egan is his. A hissed sentence, a firm glare and maybe even a clenched hand on the shoulder is all it takes to make the man stop his advances

Gale is hella possessive, is driven to do anything to keep John's gaze trained in him. Sometimes he'll slide his hand on John's thigh, tangle his hands in the small hairs on the nape of his neck, lean in and whisper something in his ear. At the worst of times, Gale will be tempted to just grab the lapels of his jacket and devour him in front of everyone, not caring who sees

when John gets hurt? oh boy you better imagine Gale is absolutely losing his mind. some animalistic thing gets awoken in him and at first he's furious, determined to kill anyone and everyone who even looks at John. then he's doting over John, holding onto him and soothing him even when John squawks and claims he's fine. Gale won't leave his side until he's determined John is alright

I like to think that John likes to mark Gale, but nowhere near as much as Gale likes to mark John. He'll bite him until there's teeth marks on his shoulders, thighs, neck, anywhere he can reach and clamp his teeth onto. kisses and hickeys all over John's neck and shoulders and that makes Gale smile to himself every time he sees them.

at first I think Gale is a little appalled at John knowing how deep Gale's devotion runs, but then it just adds to the possessive behavior. Makes him want to hold him and mark him even more. Obviously, this makes John just absolutely feral, makes him hot and bothered to think about how deep Gales animalistic devotion runs

John may be devoted like a dog is to its owner, Gale is devoted like a jealous cat, immediately forcing itself onto its owner until only it's scent remains.

oh anon this one wrenched something feral inside of me also. I love writing about possessive and jealous clegan, it's comforting for the soul. thank you so much for the ask!

[sanjisboyfie]

to help me sleep at night just random individual headcanons from various places of my brain (did it on my phone if typo ignore or u eill explode)

m!reader

if suguru is smoking and you come up to him:

option a: you smoke too, he lights your cigarette up w his lighter, cupping his hand over the flame to make sure it doesnt go out before your end is properly lit, OR he makes sure you have yours in your mouth, before leaning in towards you (his is in his mouth) and pressing the two ends together to make yours light off of his end, OR, he just insists on you two sharing the one hes already smoking, smirking as hes got infinite amount of indirect kisses lined up for him now

option b: you don't smoke, so he immediately stomps it out on the ground and blows the last hit he took into thr opposite direction of you so you dont ahve to smell it/smell like it.

satoru really loves embarassing you two in public, especially in his teen days. out of nowhere, really erotic noises would come from him - obviously unprompted and unprovoked - and he'd just start obnoxiously moaning your name...so fucking embarrassing. its like hes got the humor of a middle schooler. like youre in the arcade playing games w each other, he loses, and then he starts shaking the poor machine and jolting his hips back and forth AS IF hes getting railed when obviously hes FUCKING NOT and screaming "eugh!! uAgh!! HARDER [NAME]!! FUCK" and youre just trying very hard to get him to shut the fuck up

another satoru headcanon, loves gushing to u abt his lil nerd findings. when you were in highschool tgt, he would have you sit in front of him on his bed as he pointed to all the different mechanjcs his gundam figurine (bc he deffo collected them bye its ltr canon) has and going all nerdy by making silly noises like "pshhh! pfooo! baam!" as he makes them dance around in front of you. you just let him indulge you because hes honestly adorable whenever he does get rlly into it and not at all an annoying piece of shit, like he usually is. he might even rock ur bodies back and forth as hes doing all the sound effects too before setting the toy down and jus peppering kisses all over your face and neck. awww the little shit is being cute.

erm erm guys lemme cook w the one piece boys rq.

TRAFALGAR LAW...thats the headcanon.

ok obvs jk. but just imagine laws hands (gigglegiggle) and how theyre always in conract w u. mans cannottt keep his hands to himself. but nooo his hands needs to touch skin or else its not even worth it???? his fingers will slither beneath your shirt and grip onto your pelvis, or they'll go below your waistband and just run up and down your hipbone. if hes coming up from behind you his personal favorite is grabbing the back of your neck with his COLD ASS hands and watching you jump in genuine UNCOMFORTABLENESS and him jus laugh at u. then he kisses the spot he touched, covering the cold sensation w his warm lips. orrrr how about how he literally tugs you around w his hands. idk smth like pulling you inby yourbelt loops and forcing you to sit on his lap, no matter whos w u guys. or how hes always got his hand in yours so hes guiding you places/forcing you to stick near him

luffy gulp. luffy gulp gulp. the absolute sweetest sweetheart. probably loves kissing a lot. when u guys first started dating the only kisses hed accept were if u guys both looked like ducks and your lips were pursed to heaven and beyond. he thought it was rlly cute and liked how it felt. a very smiley teethy kisser if ykwim. 99.9% of ur kisses end up with him grinning ear to ear so youre basically kissing teeth stp but its ok hes babygirl it ok. luffy wants kissed for every single little thing. you gusy woke up? kiss. you guys r gonna eat breakfast? kiss. you guys r about to take a bath? kisses in the bath r fun!!!!! luffy is a kissing enthusiast. give him kisses wtfffff

tbh zoros a biter. like bro definitely bit kids when he was little. but MOVING ON FROM THAT. i mean: hes the type to bite as a form of affection. ABS IF U CANT SEE THE VISION IDC he definitely does. he sees your arms and thinks hmm i shd try eatin that in a very unserious way so he bites it when its in front of him and u genuinely look st him as if he has rabies. then he jus shrugs and ignores it??? which hello why is ur teeth imprinted in my skin rn ur jus gonna ignore it. if you guys r cuddling, he bites your bicep lightly to wake u up because hes too lazy to speak words. zoro rlly is "i no energy word bite yes" like dawg it does NOT work like that. bites your fingers sometimes when u hold hands....then licks it better when youre abiut to dcold him. the thing is this is all v nonchalantly done. like he rlly doesnt see how odd this is so he just does it and then cotninues on as if it isnt lowk v odd and abnormal. bites a lot. (he a freakazoid) dont let him rest his hesd between your legs for nap time he will definitely bite the inside of your thighs and that hurts like a bitch. next thing yk hes biting too close and taking off ur dick. do not risk it w this man.

[lemotmo]

I cropped the question for you on this one. But ugh the answer 💗

Q. What other canon plots do you hate, if you don't mind sharing? Also you've mentioned people who haven't watched the series in its entirety not really having valid opinions. You don't really think that do you? Their opinion on the current show should be just as valid. An opinion is an opinion. Everyone is allowed to view things differently.

A. Hi anon. It's a show that has run for 7 seasons, there's been several plots I haven't loved. In terms of plots I hate though, the easy go to one is the sperm donor plot (which I'm guessing you haven't seen). It had the potential to be interesting, but they just ended up doing nothing with it. And picking Buck specifically to be the donor definitely needed context the show just didn't bother providing. Buck is way too emotionally wired to father a child and then just never care to see or hear about that child again. I also absolutely hated the couple he donated to. I hated them. I thought the whole fight club thing with Eddie was not great. Technically with the way Eddie is wired it did make sense for him to a point, and again had potential, but again, it just kind of stopped with no real resolution or point in the end. Buck's lawsuit is a widely hated storyline by many, but I kind of understood what they were going for, only because Buck can be singularly sighted at times. But I still tend to skip over it in my rewatches. I don't care for the parental redemption arcs because sometimes parents just suck, and their adult children have the right to live their lives telling people their parents sucked. Buck and Eddie's parents sucked. They sucked in different ways, but they both definitely sucked. Lastly as far as hated plots go, the entire back half of season 7(episodes 7-10) belongs in a fire pit of hell never to be seen again. I won't watch any of it ever again. I rebuke it entirely. It was abysmal.

Now, I know this is not going to be the answer you were hoping for, but anyone whose knowledge of the show consists solely of 7 episodes from one season absolutely does not have a valid opinion of the characters or the show. We would be here days if I did this character by character so for the sake of time I'm going to relegate this answer to Buck, you know the half of your ship you all care the least about, but the half the audience and the show cares the most about. You never met and don't understand the reference Buck 1.0, or Buck 2.0 for that matter. You don't know clipboard Buck, or that it's canon that Eddie is the only human alive who finds that Buck endearing. You don't know who Daniel is, or how he ties into Buck's complete lack of self worth. You don't know who Carla is or how Buck met her or who she now is to Eddie and Christopher. You don't know why Buck doesn't associate with the name Evan, and why it's actually gross that Tommy refuses to call him Buck. You don't know why Buck had to wear a protective sleeve on his leg during the pickup basketball game. You don't know the significance of 3 minutes and 17 seconds. You don't know that Buck basically spent the better part of three years without a couch. You don't know that during the tsunami while trying to protect whatever was left of Christopher's innocence he started a game of I spy so Christopher would look up instead of down at the water and the bodies floating by. You don't know who taught Buck how to cook. You don't know he tended bar and worked on a ranch at one point before going to the fire academy. You don't know that Bobby fired him. This is nowhere near everything but I'm guessing you get the point. If you don't want to watch the entire series don't. No one is going to force you. But we all know the reason you won't watch it is because learning who Buck truly is would no longer allow you the ability to mold him entirely out of your Tommy headcanons. He's not a damsel in distress. He's not weak or incapable of speaking for himself or saving himself. He doesn't need Tommy to survive day to day. You don't want his canon history, fine, but it absolutely makes your opinion of him worthless.

Phew, well I feel like this is kind of a great conclusion to the posts I have been answering all night about hated plots and why some people can't seem to accept that BT isn't endgame.

It's because of this! Once again, thank you anon OP for your almost devastating eloquence. I wish I had even half of your writing talent.

Thank you once again Nonny for dropping this in my askbox.

Remember, no hate in comments or reblogs. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of the anonymous OP’s posts, you can find all of their posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[goingbuggy]

thank you, you’re the best. I will keep it short.

I wrote this to someone because I disagree with shuggy being great story in canon. But I thought longer and it turned out into more thoughts. First I do enjoy shuggy. I like them more as brothers and I like crocbug more. But I do like shuggy art sometimes.

Most of the story of shuggy is buggy being constantly angry at shanks. Every scene is just him being bitter, while shanks is chill. He’s angry because he’s not like shanks and blames himself for it. But shanks can’t help with that. It’s not abusive but you know how some DC fan are saying how joker is not harley LI but her origin story? I think it’s shuggy. Shanks is buggy begging. The have this bond but it’s over and not useful. What is left is buggy obsession which has to end. It’s without shanks reaction.

And both of those characters have more interesting and impactful relationships with other characters around them. Mostly shanks. He has people around him that are not jealous of him and are EQUAL. And buggy been replaced I think on purpose. Benn Beckman is there to be this close support that buggy could never be. Mihawk is rival, like buggy was in younger years but he’s meaningful to challenge shanks with respect and push him forward. Both of them make shanks better and fill those roles buggy couldn’t.

Buggy is just starting his bonds. He now has cross guild. And we know they’re gonna be for buggy in the future.

What do you think? I read OP many times and I think it does make sense and that is how the story will go. But you can call me out if you disagree. I respect you.

Woah, this is a long one! I just want to say, firstly, that you are entitled to your interpretations of Shanks and Buggy's relationship. However, I think you are going about this in a strange way. A bond is not measured by its usefulness, and claiming that Buggy has been "replaced" shows that you are viewing their dynamic from a distanced, almost utilitarian perspective; this isn't wrong, per se, but you are talking about characters who are meant to be people. And most people are irrational, emotional creatures who don't view their friendships as something profitable or disadvantageous. Buggy cannot be replaced by anyone, because Buggy is not a role to be filled in Shanks' life. Buggy was always just Buggy to Shanks. They were not friends because they only saw each other as useful. I think their interactions during the Wano flashback show that pretty clearly.

To address your point about Shanks and Buggy not being equals, though, I think this is a topic Oda has intentionally laid out, as it directly relates to Buggy's narrative. Buggy is someone who yearns to be seen as an equal -- just look at his reaction in Marineford when Whitebeard addresses him. (The blush is so cute, lmao.)

Buggy's insecurities are also the reason I believe he chose not to follow Shanks; my post here elaborates, but to sum it up neatly, Buggy immediately assumed he'd be working "under" Shanks, when Shanks only asked for Buggy to stay by his side. I truly think Shanks has always viewed Buggy as his equal -- it's just a matter of Buggy realizing that.

At this point in the story, they are more balanced than ever: both emperors with massive influence, albeit in different ways. As Buggy says himself, they are "on equal footing again." So, when you say their relationship has been unequal in parts, I don't disagree -- but that's not a flaw. That's intentional. It's an explicit aspect of the way their dynamic is written. It's a major source of their miscommunication.

Cross Guild is also currently a relationship in Buggy's life, but we don't exactly know where it's going. I would absolutely love it if Mihawk and Crocodile began to believe in Buggy and support him -- mostly because it would be hilarious -- but as of now, it is nowhere near a genuine bond. It is strictly business, and ironically, deeply unequal in terms of power dynamics. Buggy has only flipped the script on them recently, starting in chapter 1082, so we have to wait and see how that progresses.

At the end of the day, it's your opinion -- you can view Buggy's relationship with Shanks as uninteresting, and that's totally fine! But the lens with which you view their dynamic could use some adjusting. Your complaints stem from personal tastes, not fundamental problems with Shanks and Buggy's narrative.

[seyaryminamoto]

If you could change anything in the original ATLA storyline (besides making Sokkla happen) what would it be?

Uhhhh well with all my complaints across the years pertaining ATLA I don't think there's just one (1) singular thing I'd change.

Off the top of my head, I immediately thought I'd make Zuko's character and story more coherent :'D but then there's ALSO Iroh, who also needs to be more coherent.

I'd make the White Lotus an active faction throughout the war rather than just being Iroh's connections, initially, only to become the Avengers at the last minute. Hell... I don't even think I'd make Iroh part of the White Lotus, a group that's fighting for what's right should not readily spread its arms and embrace Fire Lord Azulon's warmongering son, much less let him be their leader :'D If anything, they can be a mystery Iroh spends the whole show trying to reveal, and we'd watch him prove himself to them in order to ever be deemed worthy of joining the group because NOW he has the right beliefs and is hoping to do right by the world. His membership there would not be a done deal from the get-go.

I'd also gladly make Ozai a more complex character, far worthier of being a final villain.

I'd give Toph an actual, challenging arc.

I'd make Katara learn from her mistakes so much more than she ever did.

I'd make sure Mai and Ty Lee actually learn to question what needs to be questioned rather than redeeming them just because they sided with Zuko one time.

I'd flesh out Suki way more too.

I'd give Aang more respect when it comes to his tragedy, and make his morals more consistent (which is part of respecting him and his culture that the OG show just... did whenever it suited it).

I'd absolutely rewrite every romantic relationship (I mean, even if Sokkla is canon in this dream scenario here, Maiko and Kataang still would be canon too, right?) so that they're nowhere near as unbalanced as they feel in the OG.

I'd hint at energybending all along rather than just keeping it as a last minute secret.

I'd most likely not kill Jet nor imply I killed him. Just don't see the need for it.

Probably would either give Hama a different approach or not have her around at all.

Combustion Man would also need a full rework or be deleted.

Zhao would also get more depth and complexity rather than just being around to make Zuko look better.

Sooooo... there are a lot of things worth changing if you ask me :'D but as far as priorities go, I think I'd definitely fix Zuko first out of all these things. I haven't ranted about his character for so many years in vain, even if Iroh were to stay the same, I'd love to see a Zuko who learns to think for himself and doesn't just rely on Iroh's guidance and on doing whatever he thinks Iroh would want him to do. :'D

[ultimateloserboy]

since its pride month im providing my hot take (thats actually a joke but still) i absolutely HATE IT when people are like “haha duck would be homophobic”. not because i dont agree with queer people making those jokes, but because it doesnt give him enough credit when it comes to his assholery. making fun of someone for being gay is so lame and overdone. this man is the type to forgive you for being gay but NOT your haircut!!!! he wont aim for the stupid shit like blue hair and pronouns, oh no, he’ll aim lower. he’ll aim so low he’ll be sifting through your family photos to see which family member d/ed to make fun of you for it. he’ll be the type to say “he should be hit by a bus” and when corrected he’ll go “oh. my apologies. she should be hit by a bus” with no emphasis on the “she” either cuz thats not the part he was trying to get across. he wont be condescending about that kind of stuff, he’ll be condescending about the uglyass boots youre wearing today. or the way your eyelashes are fucked up. he cant judge you for who you are or what you like, hes a drag queen that kisses household appliances, but he absolutely can judge you for that one pimple you tried to hide that you’re incredibly insecure about that you popped and now its scarring and he’s laughing and pointing at you and all that kinda stuff. also the guy hes into is a naked man with nothing up or down (if you know what i mean) so the idea of him being transphobic is laughable. especially paired with the fact that THERE IS ALMOST LITERALLY NOBODY CANONICALLY WITH BIO SEXES!! LIKE WHY WOULD HE BAT AN EYE AT A GUY WITH BOOBS WHEN HES SURROUNDED BY STRANGER, LESS HUMAN MEN!? i could go on all day about how gender as a concept in dhmis is nowhere near the cis ideology but the main point im making is that when the computer tells duck “hey imma boy” hes like “shit me too brother, but i dont have those bigass teeth tho LMAOOOOO!!!”

also extra point hed be the type of guy to get arrested for something serious and be like “god forbid A GAY MAN do ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!” and def reclaims gay slurs like. he is the type to wear the “THATS MR F//GOT TO YOU!!” shirt and red guy has to tell him not to (although i highly doubt they have slurs in their world cuz theyve suffered enough)

[invested-in-your-future]

I feel like people wouldn't discriminate openly again after the War. Maybe shops refusing service but they aren't going to imprison people just because they are Faunus. The world has rejected that.

I am sorry but that's naive.

That's now how racism works - bigots don't just shrug and become good when they are told "racism bad" (despite that being the only thing shown happening in the MilesWBY canon, with Yang telling someone racism bad).

Discrimination has layers, and levels of intensity - and people "feeling" that way don't just disappear - they adapt and they prod over and over again to see what's "acceptable" currently.

Sure, smaller discrimination cases will happen, but that's not the "end".

Discrimination always longs to reach its "greatest hits" - there's a reason why lots of ideologies of oppression resort to "Hey, do you want to go back to the Good Old Days when X?"

Smaller cases of intolerance not getting a pushback are treated as "acceptable status quo" - and the bigotry takes a step forward and escalates onto bigger ones.

And before you know it, you have dehumanizing language, restrictions, rights being taken away, laws being walked back upon and repealed.

It's all about moving the window of what's "acceptable" - we have seen it in our world over and over again (for example - the surge of racism and authoritarian surveillance after September 11)

Think about it - in the show, with Volume 3 one of the four largest huntsmen academies got assaulted by White Fang.

Of course, it's not just them, but that only means different people with different prejudices will focus on different parts of what happened - to some, Atlas would be at fault, while to others - Faunus would be at fault.

Discrimination of all kinds would absolutely escalate - bigotry twists facts to its liking to "prove itself right" - mistrust spreads, and tragedy births propaganda.

And yes - White Fang is not the whole species, but to bigots, that wouldn't matter - it's an age-old tradition to take the examples of worst-of and use them as stereotypes, broad brush strokes, and all.

Destruction, discrimination, AND war are largely cyclical in no small part due to complacency and ignorance.

Need I remind you that even in "present-day Remnant" Atlas (and especially Schnees) had literal slave mines? Remnant is nowhere near close to getting rid of the uglier parts of its past.

One of the most disappointing aspects of the show is that there never were any real consequences or shockwaves from what happened at Vale - not just in terms of kingdom relations and tensions, but also in terms of Faunus rights, mistrust, and overall chaos. In a way, the show ended up making Fall of Beacon feel smaller than it actually was because of that.

The shockwaves of what happened at Beacon SHOULD affect all four main leads in different ways due to how the event connects to them as people.

It robbed us of the arc about Ruby dealing with the realities of the world and her idealism as the world around her falls apart and everyone she knows is hurt (and few of her closest friends are dead)

It robbed us of the arc about Weiss having to face the oppressive privileged nature of her family and things in her life she took for granted.

It robbed us of the arc about Blake having to face the increasingly hostile world around her as she struggles to find her path and face her own indecisiveness and hypocrisy.

It robbed us of Yang having to deal with the fallout of the tournament and the uncertain chaotic reality of the world around her as she's searching for a goal of her own.

It's one of the first things I thought about when I started outlining my plans years ago. There are multiple avalanche effects planned out for more than one part of the setting and characterization of the leads.

[elexuscal]

Network Effect, but it happens immediately on the tail end of Exit Strategy

this is one of the funniest fandom AUs out there, imo. (also one of the saddest! but also like. in a fun way)

Mensah, Pin-Lee, Gurathin, and Ratthi are just SO glad to be home soon

they're also really glad that SecUnit seems to have regained the ability to talk

even if like, only 40% of what it says seems to logically follow whatever conversation they were having

like that sounds like a dig but they seriously have spent the last 2 weeks thinking its brain might have been totally fried

so they get in a shuttle to go back to the station when

mysterious ship appears out of nowhere?

YOINKS them

murderbot is like 'hey that's my friend wtf ART'

"what do you mean," its humans ask

it Does Not Clarify

maybe just says like a random stream of code, aloud. completely impossible to parse

i'd like to remind everyone that Dr. Ayda Mensah has some Severe Kidnapping Trauma that has not managed to start unpacking at all at this point. and now she's been kidnapped. again.

at least her friends are along for the ride this time???

(she feels awful for being this relieved)

ship is totally empty when they get on board

except for creepy grey people

SecUnit started being able to walk around its MedBay like 47 hours ago

it was not pretty. it fell on its face like. 3 separate times.

now it has to kill a bunch of targets

it still manages it but not with anywhere NEAR its usual level of grace

this just makes it more angry

it does not help that it keeps forgetting where it's in its own timeline

keeps pinging ART. keeps being surprised when it doesn't answer. all over again.

the humans are the ones doing the majority of the Smart Detective Work and making theories on What's Happening Here and interrogating Ras and Eletra

Ras and Eletra who, by the way, are like 'hey your SecUnit is seriously glitching you should probably put it down.'

'no'

'okay we can at least turn it off and shove it in one of the mortuary tubes-'

"NO"

"yeesh okay we're just giving a suggestion" [Eletra and Ras exchange a 'get a load of these crazy freeholders' look behind their backs]

MB is currently have a conversation, aloud, to a crumpled drone

good news: being in a familiar environment is helping MB's memory retrieval

bad news: those memories are letting MB know something Is Very Very wrong

1-3 emotional breakdowns happen during this point. One of them is definitely Murderbot's

it's even worse than in canon Network Effect

"My friend is DEAD"

they haven't found ANY dead bodies at this point, though, so...

PresAux starts realising maybe the dead friend is... an AI?

Ras's brain gets fried around this point. Then Ratthi, as the closest thing the team has to a doctor, has to cut Eletra's chip out of her neck. so he probably gets one of those emotional breakdowns.

'wtf how did we get out of a wormhole so fast??'

In this time-line, Murderbot is in no state to fight AND do complex coding attacks at the same time

(it's really in no state to be doing even one of these by the way but oh well)

that mean Pin-Lee and Gurathin are absolutely doing the majority of fighting off TargetControlSys

and then MB gets that delayed datapackage from ART

"For Eden? what the fuck does that mean?"

is it a religious message? a code?

"hey isn't there a character named that in Sanctuary Moon?" asks Ratthi

MB might be in a pitched firefight at the time but that is no reason for it to not ramble about its blorbos and how cool Eden is

Mensah starts getting an idea

They find ART's secret coding bundle

they try putting in 'Eden'. doesn't work.

okay that was too obvious. try 'Sanctuary Moon'.

nope

'SecUnit'? no

'Murderbot'? long shot but... no

since they have a copy of MB's purchase contract, they have its feed address documented. it's a real long shot, but they are desperate at this point. they try it

Re-Load in Progress. Please stand-bye.

i honestly have NO idea what MB says when ART comes online this time

maybe something super sweet and sappy. or maybe it's even less coherent than in canon

either way, the humans are like 'Holy Shit' upon realising who/what Murderbot's friend ART really is

[saintsenara]

Why riddledore?

why not?

riddledore definitely started out as a crack ship for me, but it’s now something i’ve completely come round to and genuinely believe can be made to work in a way which both feels true to dumbledore and voldemort’s characters and which has something approaching a happy ending...

[you know, by their standards - the fairytale fluff girlies are probably not finding anything to please them here...]

the facetious explanation for why i think this is that neither of them would be so completely obsessed with each other if there wasn’t some sexual tension lurking underneath it.

the serious explanation is that obviously they should be absolutely horrifying together. even before we get into the flaws in their personalities - a shared tendency to lie and manipulate; a shared self-righteousness; dumbledore’s inflexibility, voldemort’s violence; the fact that they both live behind masks which conceal their true motivations and emotions and use these to project their own self-loathing onto other people; and so on - there is the fact that they have a colossal age gap, that their acquaintance was established when voldemort was a child, that their relationship was set at that point by dumbledore spectacularly failing to understand voldemort or offer him the support he needed [instead, dumbledore took one look at a clearly-traumatised orphan, said "lol, he reminds me of gellert", and then did nothing about it], that dumbledore deadnames voldemort constantly as a power-play, and much more besides.

there is virtually no scenario in any timeline in which they could be openly in a relationship unless one of them is concealing their identity. and - and really this seems quite minor in the grand scheme of things - they are obviously constantly trying to destroy each other in increasingly theatrical ways.

but...

dumbledore and voldemort are very, very similar people - even if canon spends much less time interrogating what they have in common than it does on examining voldemort’s similarities with either harry or snape. dumbledore’s description of the young voldemort in half-blood prince as secretive, independent, obsessed with magic, and so on equally applies to him - and the fact that he recognises himself in voldemort is evidently something which triggers his kneejerk dislike of him when they first meet, and which sustains this dislike into voldemort’s adulthood.

voldemort is clearly aware of this - it’s obvious in canon that one of the things he dislikes about dumbledore is that he perceives him to be a hypocrite, who won’t admit that he has the same attitude towards magic, being considered important, and so on as voldemort himself does - but this can be turned on its head, and dumbledore’s recognition of himself in voldemort can become the foundation for a relationship which is sincerely fulfilling.

after all, they’re intellectually compatible - they are probably the only two characters in the entire series who could be described as the other’s intellectual equal - and, while their divergent approaches to intellectual gatekeeping are a point of tension [dumbledore, out of shame over grindelwald, refuses to allow himself to move beyond disciplinary boundaries; voldemort obviously thinks that's complete bullshit], they are not - i think - an insurmountable one. the two of them are definitely ending up in bed the first few times because they’re arguing about the twelve uses of dragons’ blood - and i love that for them - but they are also going to be able to offer each other another person who actually understands what they're on about when it comes to magic, and i don't think we should underestimate just how attractive that can be...

more profoundly, their lives are both shaped by an absolutely cavernous grief - and this drives their views on death, love, duty, and so on, which are nowhere near as divergent as the text believes they are.

the love which dumbledore prioritises throughout the series is love-as-sacrifice, a love which emphasises the nobility of suffering and which is rooted in loss - and it is this, specifically, which voldemort [whose upbringing was, of course, one which gave him nothing to sacrifice and nobody to sacrifice it for, and which made him understandably opposed to his own suffering], rejects.

but, both dumbledore and voldemort are people whose grief makes them potentially receptive to the value of love-as-pleasure. they’re dismissive of this idea in canon - dumbledore because he thinks pleasure is something he doesn’t deserve, since his sexual desire for grindelwald was what caused the sequence of events which led to ariana’s death, voldemort because deriving comfort from other people is something he considers to be a sign of weakness - but they’re both clearly lonelier and more starved for affection than they’d be willing to admit. they can, in their own little ways, give each other an outlet to permit themselves to take pleasure in someone else - undoubtedly by convincing themselves [initially, at least] that they’re only sleeping together in order to have power over the other, and that staying the night for a little cuddle is definitely a real part of that…

[the most interesting riddledore scenario is, of course, what happens when voldemort finds out about grindelwald. and, actually, i don’t think that he’d take this anywhere near as badly as is often assumed. as i’ve said, voldemort’s issue is that he thinks dumbledore’s a hypocrite, and so learning why dumbledore constructed his benign and good public mask would help voldemort make sense of him. he’s not going to be jealous - he thinks he’s cleverer and hotter than everyone, gellert grindelwald included, and, since he's not afraid of hard work and convinced he's always right, he's more than happy to demonstrate to dumbledore why blondes definitely don't have more fun...]

[tonydaddingham]

I love Aziraphale but I DO kind of feel like he was objectively more wrong than Crowley was, bc Aziraphale's plot for most of S2 comes straight out of Terry Pratchett books: he shuts down Crowley and focuses on setting up this storybook romance for them, while ignoring everyone else's distress. Like we see from the start of the season that Crowley is depressed and clearly upset, and it gets worse as it progresses, but Aziraphale doesn't even clock that something is wrong, even when Crowley is outright telling him. Of course this is going to create and nurture a situation where Crowley doesn't communicate. Aziraphale's not listening to him anyway. One of Terry's books features a witch who uses her magic to force fairy tale plots onto the people around her. It's the pinnacle of toxic positivity.

hi anon!!!✨ oooooh i have a feeling that this is going to be a long one, my apologies in advance!!! also, please forgive my ignorance on pratchett's works, im not deliberately ignoring it, but definitely not familiar with it enough to draw on any narrative similarities unfortunately!!!

so on the point of aziraphale not recognising that crowley is depressed, i do think that there are some indicators that if aziraphale paid more attention, he would pick up on it. that being said, i do think that the depth of crowley's not-okayness is largely masked from aziraphale, and is mostly shown only to other characters and obviously to the audience; the scene on the park bench with shax, for example, or any scenes between crowley in/around the bentley. one example that aziraphale could have picked up on:

c: "what i need is for him to be nowhere near me, and the precious, peaceful, fragile existence ive carved out for myself here..."

a: "i thought we carved it out for ourselves?"

c: "so did i!"

so, obviously crowley started in on the fact that gabriel threatened aziraphale in ep6, and quite rightly uses this as a reason to leave well enough alone, get rid of gabriel, and go back to their life as it was before. and crowley's language and delivery is absolutely indicative of how desperate he is to keep the status quo, that he's hanging on practically by a thread. shax and hell are keeping tabs on him, he's living in his car (which i'll come onto later), and he doesn't have much of a Purpose anymore than just existing.

aziraphale should be reading into this, 110%. but, crowley ends up underplaying his own struggle by talking about 'i' and 'me'. that doesn't mean its less true or valid, but to aziraphale's mind, he appears to be thinking only about how gabriel's presence would affect him. it immediately undermines how crowley first went in to trying to convince aziraphale to turn out gabriel, because it reads like crowley is revealing his true issue with the situation. we know that it's because, to crowley, aziraphale is ignoring him and his warning (which he absolutely is).

but crowley hasn't told aziraphale the full story of what happened; what gabriel said. aziraphale doesn't have the context to understand the full scope of crowley's fear and anger. i don't think knowing it would have necessarily changed the ultimate outcome/decision - i do think aziraphale is still kind and forgiving ("it's one of my favourite things!") to a fault - but it might have stopped aziraphale completely closing off and shutting down the continuance of what could have been a communicative and honest discussion. that, despite all of it, crowley is stepping away from aziraphale and planting himself on His (crowley's) Side, not Their Side.

aziraphale attempts to pull the conversation back; he tells crowley he would love for him to help, and that aziraphale is actively asking for help (which, verbally and with full intent, i don't recall aziraphale having done anywhere before this point in canon; he's intimated it, made very strong suggestions that he wants crowley to help/do something for him). this is a big show of vulnerability on aziraphale's part ("i need you!"), to literally put those words into the space between them... and crowley is silent. crowley is absolutely justified in not helping gabriel, but i think aziraphale's reaction is just as understandable.

but then moving on through to ep2, i think the next bit where aziraphale probably should have seen that crowley is Not Okay is the bentley/bookshop discussion, and crowley's reluctance to share it. from crowley's point of view, this car is literally the only tie he has left (will still get to the Sleeping In His Car debacle later) to anything permanent. this car that is literally an extension of him, comforts and shelters him, his complete Ride or Die - even to the end of the world. it is completely understandable that crowley would be jealous of it, want to keep a portion of his world for himself.

from aziraphale's point of view, as suggestive as it can be interpreted, he's opened his doors literally to crowley since at least 1941 - even earlier, if we count the 1800 scene that was cut (where, if gabriel and sandalphon hadn't turned up, i have no doubts that crowley would have been welcomed in straight away). it's definitely believable that crowley, between at least 1800 - 1827, might have been welcome in the shop... possibly even between 1827 - 1862 depending whether or not crowley spent "quite some time" in the pits of hell after edinburgh.

and this is likely to have been an exponential occurrence between 2008 - 2023, possibly even between 1967 - 2008 (depending on whether they had or had not been in continued contact follow the holy water incident). either way, again from aziraphale's perspective, the tie he has to earth and his life on it has been steadily then repeatedly shared with crowley. that's where he feels safe, and is himself, and is an extension of him. it's where they both feel like that in 2023. aziraphale has, presumably, shared that without quibble, has even been - judging by the s2 scene - something he has actively encouraged. it's definitely presumptuous, and possibly even entitled, but i think aziraphale has seen this as crowley being willing to share his life with aziraphale; why wouldn't he share the bentley? he's driven aziraphale everywhere he's wanted to go in it - doesn't crowley trust him enough to let aziraphale drive himself, for once?

ep3 sees a continuation of the above; that aziraphale changes the car, and does so without permission. whilst cute and adorable, and with the best of intentions, there is a major degree of this that is absolutely a violation on crowley, even if he logically would know that it's reversible. potentially, this is even foreshadowing of how he feels in the Final Fifteen with the angel restoration offer (im sure someone else has drawn this parallel somewhere...?).

but i do think it is absolutely a declaration from aziraphale of how wonderful he sees crowley just as he is now (his mf eyes), and how actually he doesn't want to change crowley to something better, but instead to paint the whole world in crowley's image. and its all the more powerful because a) crowley isn't there to see it, and b) he doesn't know that crowley can so viscerally detect changes made to the car.

the fact that crowley doesn't make this connection is surely a reflection of how he sees himself (see: he doesn't), and aziraphale should pick up on that... but if to aziraphale's mind crowley already knows how aziraphale feels about him through other gestures, in aziraphale's mind maybe crowley's just being coy or a bit possessive of his beloved bentley - that's fair, it's practically married behaviour! aziraphale wouldn't necessarily think to infer crowley's objections as anything different.

then we move on to ep4 (and finally talking about crowley living like a nomad), with the last scene of aziraphale helping him take out the plants to the bentley. you know - im still not 100% sure what to make of the whole situation of aziraphale not knowing that crowley is living out of his car. my main two schools of thought are that:

crowley has been spending enough time in the shop that him going out at random intervals is just normal to aziraphale - he's off doing Demon Things! he's just out on a jolly, having some time to himself! but it's okay, he always comes back! that would be possible, but we don't have any narrative to actively support this, and is practically a hc at this point. but there must be something that keeps aziraphale from digging any deeper - he is by all accounts a smart guy, and clocking that crowley has his plants in his car must get him thinking even if only for a moment... (unless he literally just chalks it up to Crowley Being Crowley, which is also feasible lbr)

the alternative thought (and not saying this is right - as i said, i literally do not have a scooby as to why aziraphale doesn't seem, on some level, to realise it) is that aziraphale does realise it, but doesn't want to face the implications of why crowley might have kept it from him, and so he buries it. i parsed this thought out more in a LWA response, full post here, but snippet screenshotted below:

i'll probably leave that bit there, but absolutely; aziraphale should be realising that something is wrong... but equally - as the king of cognitive dissonance, frankly - i don't think he wants to look deeper into something that, to him, would suggest any reason for there to be distrust between them, or a lack of openness. of course, we can see as the audience that this is a very small drop in the ocean where that's concerned, but to aziraphale - there's surely no possibility that crowley would keep something from him, not something this important.

when it comes to the Loving Gaze in ep6 (i'll come back to ep5 in a sec) that he gives when crowley admits that he's been living in his car, again - not entirely sure what to make of it. obviously it is just pure 'i utterly love/adore him', 'yes, it's you i want to be with, yes', but also maybe a measure of 'oh, you silly demon, why didn't you tell me? not that it's a problem now though, because in time we'll be together properly and you'll never have to be without a home again because your home can be with me'. he does gloss over the fact that crowley didn't tell him, and was obviously not in an okay place - but possibly in a, 'we'll talk about it later sometime, but for now - im just happy about what future we could start having from here on out. everything else is immaterial'. it's dismissive, but i also think potentially an indication that aziraphale does see, but they'll have the rest of their existence now to talk about it and heal.

anyway, back to ep5. the ball. oh lord - i honestly don't know if i have the mental acuity to even go into depth on the ball, rn. it's a Problem, and 100% on aziraphale's part. he's overcome with love, god bless him, isn't he? just so hellbent on showing crowley - it's not even about the girls, anymore, not if aziraphale really admitted it to himself - that he loves him. i think the magic spell that aziraphale creates bewitches even him, slightly - maybe not so literally, but this is a moment that has at least been decades in the making. and crowley is running around telling him there's an issue? well, they're safe in the shop (which, in a way, is absolutely true)! don't spoil this, please just hear me, hear what im trying to tell you unequivocally!

i think in aziraphale's mind, crowley tends to have a habit of overreacting (gabriel as a case in point), which is not true - but understandable when you potentially consider that aziraphale never really has all the facts. he's definitely overprotective, a point that is shown in s1 (imo, aziraphale never actively encourages the damsel-in-distress thing, but crowley just happens to show up at the slightest hint of trouble, and instead aziraphale takes this to mean that saving him, when he doesn't need saving, truly does make crowley happy). this is something crowley through his actions has encouraged - i think to assume that crowley is overreacting in this context is understandable, but yet; no, aziraphale should be listening to him. he should. and it once again feeds into the thought process that aziraphale cannot save himself - on and on it goes.

i don't think there is much to discuss in ep6 (im not going to get into the Final Fifteen - it's been analysed so much better by other people and by me too), this answer is already long enough, and i think for the most part it's fairly obvious. i do however have a dedicated FF tag in my masterpost if you do wish to peruse the various ponderings on the subject.

the only thing i guess that's really left for me to parse out is s1; aziraphale does lie to crowley. a lot. most egregious is lying about finding the antichrist but, i will say, in his defence - crowley has repeatedly asserted that they should straight-up murder a child. aziraphale drew his boundary, and crowley kept pushing, even going so far as to try tempting (and then practically demanding) that aziraphale be the one to do it. i don't think it's unjustified in that respect that aziraphale would keep that knowledge, therefore, from him - and instead turn to heaven. obviously that doesn't work out, in that respect crowley is proven right, and aziraphale immediately takes action to remedy it (calls crowley after the 9-1-metatron call).

but, it's an interesting mirror to what goes on in s2 in the theme of mutual trust and openness between them. crowley doesn't trust aziraphale not to dismiss him and run back to heaven when the going gets tough, nor does he trust him to have any sense of self-preservation (despite, yk, being a literal miracle worker and being the one to actual save their bacon in the 40s s2 minisode). but aziraphale similarly doesn't trust crowley not to try making him do something he has expressly said he will not do, and would betray a core tenet of who he is - temptation, which they both know works on aziraphale, and crowley could arguably exploit as he sees fit if aziraphale were to let him be completely vulnerable to crowley. in this respect, the foundations of their relationship, such as it is, is quite demonstrably built on sand of the quick variety.

so in essence, anon (honestly - gold star for you if you've made it to here), i don't disagree with you at all. but i think it's slightly reductive to not see that they are just as bad as each other. each have their trauma and unreconciled issues that directly inform on the action or inaction they take, and both are completely justified in that. i think it's more than possible to be empathetic to both of their perspectives, because ultimately, imo, their relationship as it was where we left it at the end of s2 was practically doomed right from where we first - in 2008 - properly join their story. im all for a huge, screaming row, and the promise of quieter, more delicate conversations thereafter, in s3; boy, do they need it!✨

[whoredmode]

So SR has always had things like zombies in it, basing off that - what are your thoughts on supernatural elements? Do they exist, or is it all a hoax?

if you’re asking if there’s any supernatural elements in my canon, absolutely not. if you read my pinned and go through my tags i make it pretty clear that any supernatural elements do not exist in my canon. zombies, aliens, whatever else have been omitted completely. the “zombie lin” stuff is probably as close as it gets, but that’s a complete urban legend, and i’ll link some stuff i’ve written here and here on the topic. honestly i’m more than happy to talk about stilwater’s worldbuilding and urban legends, if that’s of anyone’s interest.

and if it counts, anteros also claims to see ghosts after he wakes up from his coma. that’s a whole thing. also the philosotologists are technically a UFO cult, as in they believe in an extraterrestrial higher power (but it’s very obviously not true).

but if you’re just asking my general thoughts on sr’s relationship w the paranormal, it’s….contentious to say the least. here’s the thing. sr1 and sr2 knew how to be video games. they told grounded stories w grounded gameplay but knew when to up the ante, when to add hyperreal elements and absurdity. it was suited to the moment. it was tongue-in-cheek. it wasn’t placed as a large canon centerpiece. it wasn’t meant for you to take it seriously, and that’s when it worked. i really enjoy that. but srtt’s zombie shit in the last act of its story comes completely out of left field, completely detracts from the story, makes no sense, and is just a nuisance in actual gameplay. in the previous two games, zombies were a joke—you get your dead friend back as a homie. it’s not “canon” to the story you’re experiencing, to the world they live in. srtt suddenly saying “actually zombies are real and now an island is infested w them” is just. pushing it. it’s bad. but imo it’s nowhere near the levels of pointless and embarrassing that sriv is.

i swear i could write a fucking thesis on how sriv is the perfect example of how not to end an ongoing story/canon. my thoughts on the aliens and supernatural elements of sriv? it’s bad. garbage. worst anyone’s ever done it. at least srtt gives me the option to just physically ignore the zombies on arapice island, even if it means having to take the long way around. aliens are baked into every contrived piece of sriv. there’s no getting away from it.

so like i said. contentious. i think when it’s done in a purposefully cheeky and non-obtrusive way, it works great. it adds a lot of memorable charm. having those moments of heightened reality, hints of something beyond our realm, it gives you so much more creative leeway for telling a meaningful and grounded story bc you have the freedom to interpret that as you want. but being forced to reckon w it in a canon way like srtt and sriv do, it forces a complete tonal shift. you can’t really do that grounded realistic story anymore when you suddenly add “zombies and aliens are actually real” and especially w what sriv does to the story. and like. hey. i totally understand if that’s your thing. some people really prefer the supernatural aspect and want that space adventure. more power to you. but if i wanted to have a story about people fighting aliens or zombies, i’d just play a different game.

[demondwellersword]

it’s always been you.

sasuke x f!reader

warnings: gore/violence, angst, canon-divergent (instead of sasuke leaving he just disappeared; the reader takes the place of sakura but with different jutsus/skills. i also diverged from the original story of the fairytale a bit)

notes: i recently watched the movie belle (i highly recommend it!) and i absolutely fell in love with it. i thought sasuke would be a perfect fit for a beauty and the beast retelling, so i took a few liberties with the source material. enjoy! 

You were confident you’d never been more anxious in your entire life. Even your first mission felt like a walk in the park compared to the fear that currently had a vice grip on your entire body. Your heart pounded in your ears so loud you doubted you’d even be able to hear your name get called. Your chest hurt with such a ferocity that it felt as if something was slowly cracking your ribs one by one. Your hands shook so much you could barely pull the scroll out of your pocket to check (for the fifth time) if you were in the right place at the right time. 

There had to have been some kind of mistake, you thought to yourself, heart leaping into your throat at the sight of Shizune, I’m nowhere near strong enough to be going on a mission like this.

“I’m glad you could make it here on such short notice, (Name). I know this is all a bit sudden, but I figured you were the best person to take on a mission like this.” 

All you could do was bow and utter a meek, “Of course, m’lady.” 

“Let’s get down to business then. We’ve been fielding more and more complaints about people on the outskirts of the village seeing some sort of monster moving through the trees at all hours of the day. A few brave—in my opinion stupid—souls have tried to catch it, but not a single one has even gotten close.”

“Is that where I come in?” You asked timidly.

The Hokage nodded. “I need you to patrol the outskirts and see if you can catch a glimpse of what’s been terrorizing the villagers. You’ll be leaving with Sai and Naruto tomorrow afternoon. But (Name),” the Hokage beckoned you closer, lowering her voice slightly, “you have to promise me that you won’t tell Naruto why you’re in the village.” 

“Yes ma’am.” 

“I’ve told Sai the same. There’s a chance this could provide us with a lead on the disappearance of Sasuke Uchiha, and we can’t have Naruto, well...”

“Being Naruto?” 

“Exactly. I trust you and Sai will be more than equipped to handle this, but still exercise caution and use your best discretion. We don’t want anyone else disappearing, got it?”

“Yes ma’am.” 

“Good.” As you turned to leave, the Hokage spoke one last time. “Be careful, (Name). I hope you’re able to find what you’re looking for.” 

*

Lady Tsunade’s final words rang in your head every sleepless hour that led up to your departure. What you were looking for, what you had always been looking for, was Sasuke. You were the last person to see him before his untimely disappearance, and the weight of it had crushed you ever since. No matter how good of a kunoichi you’d become there was a constant grey cloud hanging over your head—the belief held among many of Konoha’s citizens that you were the reason its brightest star had suddenly disappeared from the sky. 

You guessed it was why Lady Tsunade had given you the mission in the first place. She and Kakashi were the only people you had confided in about the relentless ridicule you’d been subjected to, so she knew better than anybody else how much it meant to you. It was why now, as you stood at the village gates waiting for Sai and Naruto to arrive, you felt as if the dango you’d eaten for lunch was about to rise back up from your turning stomach.

“Hey (Name)! What’s wrong? Aren’t you excited to be going on a mission? You talked to Granny Tsunade yesterday, right? How’d it go?” 

All you could do was blink in response to Naruto’s rapid-fire questions. Your eyes drifted over to Sai, noting that he looked just as lost as you did. 

“Good afternoon, (Name). You seem to be upset, is there something you would like to talk about?” 

“No, but thank you Sai.” You gave him a kind smile. “We should probably get going so we can get settled before ni—“ Sai shot you a dangerous look. “Before it gets too dark out. We’ll need to find a place to stay for the night before we do anything else.” 

“Good idea, (Name). You and I can take up the rear. Naruto, how about you take the lead and start heading toward the outskirts.” 

“Who died and made you leader?” Naruto remarked with a huff, starting with a leisurely pace toward the treeline in the distance. 

“Thank you, Sai,” You said once Naruto was out of earshot, beginning to bound through the trees a safe distance behind him. 

“Lady Tsunade informed me of the importance of this mission to you. I don’t know what kind of bond you two shared, but it seems that he means a great deal to you. Am I correct?” 

You nodded. “He was my best friend. I...” 

You swallowed thickly, the words dying in your throat. He was more than just your best friend or your teammate or your partner. For all of your shyness and all of his aloofness, it seemed you two were the only ones who understood each other. When you were young you’d been a calm, united force against the arrogance and unpredictability of Naruto; as you’d grown older you each became powerful in your own rights, but had never entirely abandoned each other. 

Until. 

“You’re much quieter than usual. It said in my book that often times subjects like this can be difficult for people to discuss, even if many years have gone by since it happened. I hope that you’ll be able to find Sasuke again, (Name).” 

The rest of the journey was spent in silence, your mind racing with thoughts. You had never entertained the thought of what might happen once you saw Sasuke again. It was always too painful, the wound always too fresh. Even now you felt a pain stab at your chest, but you couldn’t stop your mind from venturing to the thought. Would he remember you? Would he recognize you? You’d cut your hair since then, gained muscle, learned how to master the water change in chakra nature. You were different now, yet at the same time you felt as if you had remained exactly the same.

Even more concerning, would you recognize him? How much had he changed from the boy you’d promised to see tomorrow all those years ago? In your more heartbroken moments you allowed yourself to try and imagine what he would look like now, but what if you’d been wrong? What if he was unrecognizable? Would you still feel the same as you did then? 

“Hey! (Name)!” 

Naruto’s voice snapped you away from your doubts, bringing you to a screeching halt at the village’s outskirts. Sparse houses dotted the landscape, broken up by a few shops and restaurants that paled in comparison to the village proper. Lady Tsunade had arranged for the three of you to stay at a merchant’s house while he was off selling his products in another village, and Sai had been entrusted with the key a day prior to your departure.

He led the way to the modest home near the forest, which upon entering was found to be immaculately cleaned and finely furnished. Naruto immediately threw himself into a plush armchair, sitting back in it while Sai scolded him for disrespecting the house. 

“I think I’ll go rest for a bit if you two don’t mind.” You exchanged a look with Sai, making sure that he understood you’d be sleeping before you departed that night to look for the monster. 

“I’ll let you know when we’ve returned from talking to the villagers. Rest well.” 

* 

You awoke to Sai standing in your doorway, his hand raised and a smile on his face. “You’re awake.”

“Yeah, I managed to wake up on my own, but thank you for checking on me. Is Naruto asleep?”

“He just left for the bath house a few moments ago. I think I’ll join him. I wanted to stop by here and make sure you were awake first, and it seems you are, so I’ll be on my way. Please be careful while you’re patrolling, I wouldn’t want to get on Lady Tsunade’s bad side again.” 

You smiled, thanking Sai once again before he left. You pulled on your shoes and gathered your weapons, taking a deep breath before setting out into the night. The wind that met your face upon opening the door was pleasantly cool, marking the beginning of the shift from summer to autumn. It helped to wake you as you disappeared into the forest, bounding between trees while keeping your eyes open for anything out of the ordinary. 

After an hour of searching all you’d come up with was a spider in your shoe and an overwhelming sense of defeat. You slumped back in a tree and sighed, wondering if Lady Tsunade had sent you on little more than a wild goose chase. As you rested your mind drifted to Sasuke, thinking of the low-rank missions you had gone on together as genin. It had always been the two of you taking care of the actual objective while Naruto got distracted, same as it was with you and Sai now. 

But you knew better than anyone all the ways that it hadn’t been the same for a single second since Sasuke had disappeared. In his wake he had left a gaping absence, a black hole that got closer to consuming you with every day that passed by. You hated it. Hated the feeling of waking up and knowing he wasn’t there, that for all you knew he would never be there again. Hated the way the villagers whispered about you, the way that they feared and reviled you. You who had shot their brightest star right from the sky. You who was no better than the Akatsuki members—why didn’t you just join them? It seemed you would fit right in. 

Yet for some reason you dug your heels in and kept stubbornly defending the Leaf, taking any mission that someone was kind enough to give you. No matter how dangerous it was, you had to prove that you were better than the rumors. You had to prove that you were strong enough to get Sasuke back. It hadn’t been a mistake that you were the one left behind, you just had to bring him back and—

Something moved beyond the tree line. 

You readied a kunai and slowly crept toward the shadowy figure in the distance. It was still for the time being, resting in what seemed to be a crouch. Its shape was unlike anything you’d seen before, the distance and darkness making it hard to pick out any specific details. Just as its image became clearer it stood up, quickly bounding toward a point in the distance. 

You immediately followed after it, breaking out through the trees to follow it on foot. You tried to move as quietly as possible, hoping that you could stay far enough behind it that it wouldn’t sense your presence. You could now see that it had a pair of massive, grotesque wings that looked like a pair of fleshy claws. It was vaguely humanoid, with a mane of thick black hair that bounced against its back as it ran. You allowed yourself to draw closer to it, making sure your footsteps were quiet enough that it couldn’t hear you. A pang of fear pricked at your chest when you realized there was a chance whatever creature this was could sense chakra, but it was too late now to implement any sort of measures to conceal yourself. 

You matched the creature’s every step, following the winding path it took with a grim determination. It was leading you further and further away from the village, which you could only guess was a deliberate move. The longer you travelled the more you could begin to see the landscape change, the empty grassland giving way to what appeared to be an abandoned village. The creature’s pace began to quicken, obviously drawing nearer to its destination. You took the opportunity to slow down and duck behind one of the empty houses, watching as the creature made its way to an expansive house in the distance.

As you drew nearer to the house you began to realize just how impressive it was. It was built much like any other house you’d seen in the Leaf, though far more elaborate and ornate. It was more well-maintained than it should have been, and as you passed through its front gate you were amazed to see that all the structures of it were seemingly intact. 

You walked along the corridor enclosing the central garden, peering into any doors that had been left ajar as you searched for any sign of where the creature had disappeared to. You could sense a distant chakra somewhere in the house, but every time you got closer to it it seemed to disappear completely. You sighed and stopped for a moment, walking through an open door into a wide, empty room with a few dusty pillows and a shredded tatami mat in it. You took a seat in the least cobweb-covered area of the room, giving yourself a moment to rest and collect yourself before you continued the search. 

Just as you lowered yourself to the ground you heard a loud crash from the other side of the house followed by a sharp yell. You ran toward the source of the noise, ducking into one of the rooms to hide as you looked for the source of the noise. You could hear the wood floors creaking, heavy footsteps drawing closer and closer to your location....

“YOU!” The growling roar of the creature’s voice filled your ears, making your instinctively shrink back and press your back into one of the corners of the room. 

You hurled a kunai at its chest, watching in horror as the creature deflected it and appeared in front of you. It reached a hand out to wrap around your neck, slamming you back into the wall hard enough to make your teeth rattle. You tried desperately to cast a jutsu that could get you out of its grasp, but before long your vision began to ebb and all you could think to do was claw at its hands in an attempt to grant your survival. 

“Why have you come here?” You continued to grasp at its hand. “Answer me!” 

“You...you’re....” 

Your head swam, blotches of blurred black occupying more and more of your vision. You stared into the eyes of the creature, knowing it would be your last sight before you inevitably died by its hands. And when you looked into them, a single thought occupied your mind:

Sasuke.

*

You could remember the first day you’d met Sasuke Uchiha like it was yesterday. Unlike the rest of the girls in Konoha you weren’t immediately enamored with him—in fact, you’d thought he was a bit of a stuck-up jerk. You were convinced the only reason he’d passed the tests was because of his natural talent, and you resented him for already being regarded as the best. You’d spent months training to pass the test, spending hours upon hours studying your family’s water-style jutsus in order to get a spot on a team. 

It wasn’t until after your first mission that you realized you had more in common with Sasuke than you’d previously believed. On your journey back from the Land of Waves the two of you had gotten to know each other, and you felt hopeful that the two of you would become good friends. 

As the months passed you and Sasuke began to forge a bond that would eventually lead to your current heartbreak. The more he opened up to you the more you fell for him, and the more you believed that you would have a real chance at a future with him.

You were so sure, in fact, that you had made a plan to ask him out on a date the day he’d disappeared. You’d worn your favorite dress and gotten a bouquet of the prettiest flowers you could find from Ino’s family’s shop, deciding you would ask him to meet you at Ichiraku so the two of you could talk. 

You had waited there for two hours. 

The shop owner had given you a free bowl of ramen when you had slumped into one of the seats, barely holding back tears as you picked your way through a bowl of tonkotsu. You wordlessly returned the flowers to Ino on your way back to your house, sniffling your way into your room without a word to anyone about what had happened. You didn’t know how long you laid in bed and cried, but to you it felt like an eternity. 

The sun was beginning to set when you finally dragged yourself out of bed to look for him, hoping that maybe Kakashi had passed him by in the village at some point that day. When you asked him he awkwardly asked if you had been crying, abandoning his inquiry as soon as your lip began to quiver. He’d told you he’d help you look and you made him promise to keep it a secret from Naruto, following him into the village with a heaviness to your heart.

Four hours passed before you concluded that he was simply gone. The last thing you’d said to him was that you couldn’t wait to see him again. Now the words felt like knives buried in your chest, stabbing at you as you fell to your knees and sobbed at the village gates. 

Weeks would pass without any sign of Sasuke, and each day that elapsed more rumors began to spread. You became something of a recluse, burying yourself in your training in order to fill the hole that had been left in your life. You’d barely even cared when Kakashi told you and Naruto you’d be getting a new partner—what did it matter, anyway? You liked Sai well enough but you had to agree with Naruto (something you would never admit to out loud), there was no replacing the empty space Sasuke’s disappearance had left behind. 

And now here you were, staring into the same red eyes whose powers you had once resented, now buried within the face of something you had described as a monster. 

You were surprised to awaken in one of the rooms of the house, watching as sunlight illuminated your surroundings. The door connecting the room to the rest of the house was firmly shut and sealed, and the windows all had paper bombs attached to them so they couldn’t open. Save for a few cobwebs in the corners the room was relatively clean, and it was furnished with a dilapidated futon and a few pillows. There was a small box tucked into the back right corner of the room which held two days’ worth of food and water and what you swore were the shedded scales of a snake. 

Whatever—or whoever—that creature was had forced you to stay here, but it seemed as if it wasn’t doing it out of pure cruelty. You would formulate a way to escape nonetheless, hoping you’d be able to make it back to the village before anyone went looked for you. But perhaps even more importantly than that you couldn’t rest until you saw the creature again. Its eyes....you knew they were Sasuke’s. You didn’t want to think about how it had come to possess them, but you had to keep grasping onto the hope that he was still alive somewhere in there. 

A day passed before you made a plan, and it wasn’t until night fell that you began to implement it. You were to cast your tidal wave jutsu directly at the door, hoping that one point-blank blast would be enough to break the wood and free you. You took your place at the opposite side of the room and began to cast it, stopping when you heard footsteps approaching. You lowered your hands and sunk down against the wall, sitting as if you’d been there for hours on end. 

The door slowly slid open, and before the creature could stop you you cast the jutsu and bolted for the door. You ran as fast as you could down the corridor, taking a sharp left and landing yourself in the western edge of the house. There was a single room tucked into the corner that you took the opportunity to hide in, flinging the door open as the creature closed the distance between you. 

The room seemed to be in a more severe state of disrepair than the rest of the house, and the sight of it gave you a pause that you knew would surely cost you your life. There was a single dust-covered window in the room whose light shone upon a single iridescent white snake, curled up and sleeping in the room’s center. You saw the shadow of the creature blot out the light, throwing a kunai at it to buy you enough time to escape. 

You ran from the house and into the empty area that surrounded it, heart pounding in your chest as you made your way for the village. You could hear the distant bark of wild dogs growing closer, fear in your eyes as you watched them skid to a halt and surround you. You tried to distract them with shadow clones, but their ferocity made quick work of them. Your hands were shaking far too badly to properly cast any justus, and you could feel in your heart that this would be the place where your story finally came to a close. 

You watched in fear as the creature grabbed you and pushed you behind it, taking a harsh slash to the chest from one of the dogs as its hands moved to cast a jutsu. Your heart lurched as you watched the creature cast a fireball, falling to its knees as the grass in front of it caught flame. With the last of its strength the creature grabbed you and gave its fleshy wings a flap, taking off from the ground and starting back toward the house. 

It began to rapidly lose altitude as its wounds gushed blood until it finally fell just beyond the front gates of the house. You carried it the rest of the way, heart pounding in your chest as you took it back to the room you’d been held in. You sat in the room for what felt like hours, casting a healing jutsu on its wounds until you could no longer physically sustain it. 

You collapsed by the creature’s side, tears prickling in the corners of your eyes as you finally allowed yourself to take a good look at it. In the fading light of the day you could see that scars had formed across its muted brown skin, and that it’s clothes had been torn in the fight. You sucked in a breath before directing your gaze to its face, heavy tears slipping down your cheeks as you took in the sight. Buried under the thick black markings across its face and the strange color to its lips you saw him. 

You saw Sasuke. 

The longer he slept the more his features began to return to their normal state, as if whatever jutsu had been cast upon him was reversing itself in midst of the peace of sleep. The man who laid before you looked as you had always imagined him, just as beautiful as you’d remembered him. The sight made you ache, knowing what would return once he awoke. You had no idea what this curse was or why it had been placed on him, but you were determined to do whatever it took to reverse it. 

You sat with Sasuke until he woke up, hating to see the way his features shifted back into the monster’s as he sat up and looked around the room. 

“You. You’re still here.” He touched the scars along his chest, looking back up at you. “Why did you save me?” 

“I...” Your breath caught in your throat. Why was it suddenly so hard to talk to him? “I couldn’t just leave you to die.” 

“So you carried me all the way back here? And for what? So you can feel a sense of accomplishment? Or was it to ensure that I was wounded and wouldn’t attack you again?” 

Tears welled in your eyes. You reflexively leaned back, pulling your gaze away from the venomous look in Sasuke’s eyes. “I-I healed you best I could—”

He scoffed at you in response. “So what is it then? Have you been sent to torture me with the hope that something might change?” 

Your lip began to quiver. “I just want to help you, Sasuke, please.” 

For a moment, he paused. You shifted away from him, worried for what would happen next. “What did you just call me?” 

“S-Sasuke.” 

“How do you know my name?” He barked, looking as if he were ready to attack at a moment’s notice. 

“Y-you don’t remember me?” 

You could barely swallow back the sob that tore its way out of you, your chest aching as a hand clasped over your mouth. How could he not remember you? Had you just been fooling yourself, childishly tricking your mind into believing that you meant something to him? Had you honestly thought that you could save him? You, the weakest one among all of Team 7. You who had tried so hard to shine as brightly as Naruto or Sasuke, but who could never even be a star in Konoha’s sky. You who had so naively believed that life was like some kind of fairytale, that all it would take was true love’s kiss to reverse years of heartache and torment. 

You who thought you were something more than what you are. 

“Answer me.” 

You tried to stand up, tried to run away and become the coward you always knew yourself to be, but felt Sasuke’s hand wrap around your wrist and grip it tight. He pulled you back down to a sitting position, holding you so tightly that you couldn’t move. 

“I...” Hot, heavy tears now streamed down your cheeks, and your voice came out as a raspy whisper. “Sasuke you have to remember me. Please.” 

His claws dug into your skin. “Who the hell are you?” 

“(Name),” You stammered, heart hammering in your chest. 

Sasuke’s eyes narrowed. He studied you, your chakra, your clothes and everything that sat trembling before him. His scrutinizing gaze bore into you, laying you bare, breaking you down to your simplest of pieces. 

You were nothing more than a foolish girl who had wandered here believing that there was no force in the universe greater than love. 

How wrong you had been. 

Because it was hate that made beads of blood bloom against your skin. It was hate that manifested in two red eyes tearing you apart with more sting than the sharpest kunai. It was hate that had morphed the beautiful into the grotesque. It was hate that had wiped the slate clean, that had erased a life you’d thought you built. It was hate, all consuming and never ending. 

“Please let me go. I’ll leave and I won’t come back. I won’t tell anyone that you’re here, just please...” 

“No.” 

“No?” 

“You’re different. But your chakra is the same.” 

No waves of relief washed over you. Only a sick feeling deep in your stomach, heavy and dark  and thick as storm clouds. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, too afraid that you might see a shadow of his past self looking back at you. Any hope you’d once had that he would look at you with the same softened look he had before evaporated the moment he’d awoken. All you hoped for now was that you would make it out of here alive. 

He loosened his grip on your hand. “How did you know I was here?” 

How much did you want to tell him? “There....there were reports of-of something on the outskirts of the village....” 

“So they sent you here to investigate?” 

You nodded. “I didn’t want to hurt you, I promise. I-I didn’t even know it was you until...” 

You stopped yourself. Until I looked into your eyes. The curse of the Uchiha clan, always so beautiful to you. How many times had the power of those eyes saved you? How many more times did you think they would? Were you ready to let them destroy you too? 

“Why have you come here?” His voice had softened considerably, though it still held an edge of skepticism. His hand still held you in place, though no longer tight enough to make you bleed. And you, you were still terrified of him. You didn’t believe in any of this, not in the way you should have. Not in the way you had when you’d followed him here. 

To save you, Sasuke. To bring you home. 

Sasuke let go. “Why did it take so long?” 

You finally looked up at Sasuke. You saw beneath all that he had become. You saw that he was still the boy you snuck out to see, dancing across the rooftops of Konoha to the sweet melodies carried on the nighttime air. He was still the person you dreamt of every night, conjuring all manners of fantastical scenarios for your reunion. He was a monster now, yes, but this wasn’t the fate he would be resigned to. 

“I didn’t think I would ever find you again.” Your voice had returned, however small, your cheeks still shimmering with tracks of tears. “But I hoped I would. I never stopped looking for a sign that you were still alive.” 

“But why? I would think by now you would’ve given up.” 

“I-I couldn’t. I guess....” you sighed, “I guess I just couldn’t accept the fact that you were gone. The truth is, well...” 

I love you, Sasuke. That’s why I never stopped looking for you. I’ve loved you since we were kids. Not a single day has gone by where I haven’t dreamed of what it would be like to see you again. How stupid is that? I had always hoped this would be something magical but at this point I just wish you’d tell me to get lost. Please stop being so nice to me, it’ll only make what happens next hurt worse. 

“Well?” 

You couldn’t bring yourself to say it. Your hands fidgeted restlessly in your lap, eyes darting to the ground the second he looked at you. After all that had transpired you couldn’t even open your mouth, the words dying in your throat every time you tried to force yourself to get them out. 

A heavy silence settled between you and Sasuke. Did he know? Did he feel the same? Was he just waiting for you to say it, readying himself to reject you? Would the blow come soft, or would it hit harder than any jutsu that had been flung your way? You weren’t ready for the answers—but then again, you doubted that you ever would be. 

So in a moment of what would prove to either be pure stupidity or shocking boldness, you planted a hand on the floor, leaned forward, and pressed your lips into Sasuke’s. 

It felt as if time had frozen around you. Sasuke was motionless between your lips, so still that you cracked your eyes open to see if he was even there. Each second felt like an hour, ticking by at an excruciating pace. Just as you began to pull away in shame you felt his lips slowly press back against yours, a hand sliding up to gently cup your cheek. 

You leaned into him, his touch like pure electricity against your skin. It was utter bliss; everything you had ever dreamed of and more. When you finally opened your eyes and pulled away there was a moment where you felt as if you were in the twilight of sleep, worried that this was all some kind of cruel dream meant to distract you from the fact that you were still trapped somewhere in the house. But when you looked at Sasuke you knew this was as real as anything, a truth even greater than fiction. 

“Sasuke, you’re...” 

“An act of true love.” 

"What?”

“The person who cast this jutsu on me, the one who trapped me in this form, they said that the only thing that could reverse it was an act of true love. They said I would be stuck like this forever because no one would ever be able to defeat the hate in my heart. But you, (Name), you...” 

“I always did, Sasuke. Every single moment, I never once stopped.” 

Sasuke collapsed into your arms, no longer forced to bear the weight of what his past had forced him to become. You didn’t expect things to go back to the way they were, you knew that was foolish, but you did hope that the future the two of you would forge together would be a brighter one than the one you had long ago forced yourself to make peace with. 

In a few days’ time you would return to Konoha with Sasuke in tow. You knew there would be celebration, but you’d make sure he had time to recover first. You would make a bed for him on your couch or in your room or wherever he wanted to be, and you would go to sleep every night knowing that he was safe by your side once again. You couldn’t know exactly what would come in the weeks and months and years that followed, but you hoped that you would get the chance to spend them by Sasuke’s side. 

For now, though, it was enough knowing that he knew. It was enough to have said it without saying it, despite—or more likely because of—all that had happened. You held Sasuke close for as long as he needed, letting go once he sat up to look at you. 

“I always hoped it would be you that found me.” Sasuke’s eyes couldn’t quite meet yours. “I thought...I thought that you were the only one who could possibly break the jutsu.” 

You blinked. In all this time, had he wished for you the way you had him? Did he dream of this future too? Did it comfort him, or scare him? Had he believed you wouldn’t come, and was that why he lashed out the way he did? Was he scared of what would happen when you saw him not for who he was, but for what he’d become? Was he scared that you wouldn’t love him? 

“I’m glad I found you, Sasuke.” 

“I’m glad you did too.” 

You pressed another kiss into his lips, savoring the taste as if it would somehow disappear again. 

“Let’s go home, (Name).”