#its about the atrophy of your own problem solving skills

[somerunner]

OP’s tags are very good. Especially the “treating your friends like unskippable cutscenes” — the looper respects their friends enough to let their actions play out uninterrupted, but can’t afford the mental effort to engage genuinely every single time, because it’s so much easier to let it become rote.

(OP’s tags copied here. Not my tags.)

Love a self-inflicted time loop. The main character isn’t trapped.  They can stop whenever they want.  But how can they when things aren’t perfect yet?  They can do better than this.  They need to try again.  They can get it right this time.  They just need to try again.  They can stop anytime they want.  Just one more time.  They can fix this. They just need to try again.  There are still things to fix.  They just need to try again.

[mordigen]

I had not written anything in a minute, as I typically use this as my sounding board, or soap box, if you will....but I guess things just hadn't gotten under my skin lately to make me feel the need to sound off. Which is a beautiful thing, I suppose, even if writing is lacking.

Indeed it has been quite....quiet, quite harmonious within the circles I frequent. Which is unusual, especially as we've had a couple Holidays, which usually stirs all the controversy. And I know with my last 3 part post I noted I had much more to talk about....but I've forgotten them all. So, they must not have been that important, eh?

It has been nice.

But (as there's always a but) in this quiet time I noticed something else - something I am certainly not unfamiliar with, but have never talked about, or confronted at all really.

I find myself feeling drawn away - and no, not in the depressive sense, as I am also certainly not unfamiliar with, but in a way that I have a hard time defining.

It is melancholy in the sense that it feels like a deep seated yearning - but not in a bad way, by any means, as I feel like if those yearnings didn't come and go over time, then I wouldn't be wholly myself. They are a part of me - they are not a bad thing, even if bittersweet.

They ebb and flow, and sometimes recede completely - at other times consume me completely. Though they usually hit me without warning, they start gradually and I can feel the oncoming tide. And once they've run their course, they recede just as swiftly, and gently, as they've rushed upon me.

It has happened for as long as I can, lucidly, remember. Though putting an exact date or age to it is difficult, as childhood memories tend to mesh and bleed together over the years, it can easily be said adolescence, at least, so it has been quite some time. But I still haven't ever gotten used to them, or have figured out how to cope with them - mentally or emotionally, anyhow. They do not prevent me from functioning or living my life, but they do wreck my mental state in a way. Though, I'm not sure I want to figure out how to cope with that...

I have been told by various people, at various points in my life, that I suffer from various forms of a disassociative disorder. Knowing I have depression issues I have investigated....but, No. Just no - it's not right. In all the many ones I have done ample research in, it's just not right - that is not me, that is not what I am experiencing. That is not what is happening, the "symptoms", even if some appear similar superficially, are all wrong.

When I say I feel drawn away, I do not mean I feel *detached*. That is a very big distinction - I'm feeling pulled away, to somewhere or something else, I do not feel disconnected. You can feel a connection to multiple things at once - so to be pulled into a something or somewhere else doesn't mean I have to detach, or "disassociate" with the here and now. I don't. Perhaps it is a foreign thing to try to describe to someone who has never experienced it before, and yes it is a hard to find the right words to begin with to really explain it in depth - but it's not that I "disassociate". Stop calling it that.

It is this very reason why I have never talked about it in depth at all, because even the slightest mention of anything puts others on high-alert. I know they are only trying to help, but no - you are not listening, you are not understanding. The best, and simplest, way I can recount it is like prioritizing. This thing - it's always there. It's always in me, and sometimes it just needs it's time. It doesn't even come first, as I still put all the needs and wants and important bits of this finite world first and foremost, but it needs its time in the sun, too.

As a child, they would say I was "dreamy" or just had an active imagination - I would day dream frequently, locked up inside my own head. Though I loved to play, and read, and write, and draw, I didn't need those things to enjoy my time. I could lay around for hours, in my own thoughts, completely happy and content, drawn away, off on an adventure, listening to the silent things whisper when they think no one is listening. I would doze and nap, and sleep extra long through the night - not because I was bored, or tired, but just because it gave me time in my own head - in my 'dreamland', where all these other things happened that wouldn't - or couldn't - in the waking world. As a young child, these were always described as good things....as a teen, it's often described as having your "head in the clouds" - something that is not necessarily good or bad, potentially problematic if left unchecked, but still nonetheless endearing. But as an adult? Phh. Well. Something must be wrong with you.

You're expected to grow out of it, but I find in adulthood it hits harder, and comes heavier, than ever as a child. Possibly because as children we're given room to indulge...it's creative, imaginative, learning to be content with your own company is touted as idealistic means of coping skills and personal growth - until it isn't.

For an extended time of my adult years I was wrongfully persuaded that it was hormonal as others had noted I tended to feel this 'drawing' around my cycle. I do get more emotional, and boy does the fatigue hit hard - but that still didn't make sense to me as it didn't happen *every* time on my cycle, and there were plenty of times it happened not on my cycle at all. Well, it doesn't have to happen everytime for it to be related, and hormones fluctuate throughout the whole month, so you don't have to actually be physically bleeding for it to be cycle related. What a cop out. With that logic, anything and everything under the sun and moon can be "cycle related". Bonus points deducted for the fact that every person telling me this was also, in fact, a woman. Shame. Lazy medicine right there. Lazy womanhood right there. And that's not even a feminist statement - that's just a common sense statement. Oh, so is every possible problem you ever have because of your period, M'AM ? So stupid. Stupider, yet, is that I listened to them. But I did, and I followed their suggestions - none of them worked, but with each new wave I would think the next would be better and easier if I just stayed the course - ignoring the fact that nothing was inherently wrong, and that this was only deemed an "issue" as it was categorized as "abnormal" and therefore must be fixed.

What I have come to realize now is that all those incidents - people wanting to categorize me with mental disorders, emotional disorders, or hormonal imbalances - call came at I time when I was, in fact, disconnected with something : my spirituality. I didn't have any type of falling out, or disillusioned from anything I ever believed in. Life just simply got in the way, I had more important things to worry about and do, and much less time to do them all in, so you just let certain things go that are not as pressing. Looking back at it now, I think maybe that is why they pulled on me harder in those years. Perhaps it was something drawing back in... I'd like to believe so, anyhow. And that's why I was stupid enough to believe doctors, and counselors, about stupid things I knew were not right - because I wasn't listening to the other half. And of course, nothing the ever suggested ever made one bit of difference - because it's not what was happening to me. And truthfully, because nothing was ever wrong.

As life started to level out, I slowly started doing little things here and there with my beliefs, with my workings. Little things, but baby steps, right? You can't just get off the couch and run a marathon - you have to warm up those muscles, start exercising those parts that have atrophied, and retraining your skills. Same applies - baby steps. It grew slowly over a few years - the tidal waves kept their course, as they do, and I just sort of accepted it at face value. But then the pandemic hit, and the world shut down. And boy, did I have all the time in the world.....and I used it.

Over this last year what I have come to realize is that, firstly - I was absolutely not alone. But also that I wasn't really paying as much attention as I thought I was - or my attention was skewed , by 'professionals', to focus on the wrong things. There was much more a pattern than I had ever noticed. These waves didn't come out of nowhere - though once they were on me, I could feel the gradual build - but before they ever even tickled my feet there were signs, there were patterns. I'd have days of restless nights, strange dreams, then it would fold into die-hard sleep, with absolutely no dreams at all - but waking as if I hadn't slept a wink and had been working all through the night. I'd wake with aches and strains, sometimes even bruises. We'd joke that our mattress was beating us up at night - we even forked out decent money for a brand new one. It's fabulous, and it solved zero of my problems, though my husband now sleeps like a baby...

It's only after these restless, exhausting nights does the tide start to flow back in, and the dreamy, dozey longing set in. The ache for something I cannot put my finger on, and the willingness to relent and let it take me away, even for just a time, and indulge in that pulling out to sea. I let it take me now - I do not fight it, I do not endure it, I let it take me and draw me out. And this is what so many professionals call "disassociating" - but that's not right. That's not what's happening.

And this is not some great spiritual come to Jeesus moment I am preaching to any of you, or certainly not meaning to be, but just the simplicity of paying attention. We, as pagans, just have the driven, inherent understansung that there are many more forces, and much more out there than what you see on the surface. And I had forgotten. Though I've kept my mouth shut, I've taken note when the topics and discussions come up - tons of people were in my very shoes. But they had been paying attention all along. I had forgotten. Some of the stories thrown out there I can't always get behind. Some of them are just flat out - No. But there were many more that weren't - they talked of the moon. The conjunctions. Astral travel. Being spirited away in the night. The veils. The Oran Mór. I was so stupid, I had been so blind.

And then, this year of much more laxed time gave me the opportunity to actually listen. These tides... their pattern.

The restless nights always came with the moons - these tides, they always came around significant dates....days when the veils are thinning. And now, as I feel the sweeping tides begin to pull again - here we are. Bealtaine is on the horizon. And as I wrack my memories.... every time.

Every. Time.

What is happening to me exactly? I still do not know - is this the call of the Oran Mór? Are the veils pulling at something deep inside me? Are the Fae trying to steal me away, as so many are quick to warn... Is there danger in letting the tides take me? Is this some deeper part of me being drawn home, trying to jar me to pay closer attention to things I have left forgotten? Something in there makes me think of my brothers...

I don't know all these answers, but I can't ignore them now that I've taken the time to listen. What I do know is that, whatever they may be - I don't want these tides to leave me. And believing that doesn't give me a dissociative disorder.

[goabrakadoodle]

Consider this question first. Do you have any idea how many bits of information our brains take in every second? 11 billion bits! Out of which we process maybe 50 to 150 bits, and then can consciously hold just about 5 bits in our minds on a good day. 11 billion bits down to just 5. What a waste.

This means we are walking around eliminating almost everything that we see, and retaining only what we want to see. We’ve become really good at it. Bundling all these bits together and trying to make sense out of it. Skimming the surface, as opposed to unearthing the nuggets that might be lying just underneath. All because we don’t have the time.

So the less time we have and the more familiar we are with a given situation, the more likely we are to just take a superficial scan of the information we have, snatch and grab the bits of information we need, and think with it.

Which perhaps is why hacks and short cuts have become so popular. And which is why we end up making a mess of everything we attempt to do. So obvious. Superficial information, superficial thinking, superficial result.

It’s time for a way out of this mess: Art Jamming teaches you to get the most out of your thinking. Helps you work and operate in a creative space with a creative mindset. This is important, because both decide whether you will be happy and enjoy what you do in life, or continue to feel anxious every time you are faced with an out of the ordinary problem you can’t solve.

Art Jamming is a process art driven program designed to unjam the mind. Think with the blinds off. It aims to create an experience that is inspiring, rejuvenating and invigorating.

What is also so good about our Art Jamming sessions is you don’t need to know anything about art or painting. Or know how to hold a paintbrush in your hand even. In fact, the less you know, the better will be the outcome.

Our art jamming program does not assume anything. It is an all-inclusive process that engages both sides of the brain, simplifies complexity and helps you see better, think better, and work smarter at any age. Art Jamming helps bring a creative mindset to life through play.

What is a creative mindset? While everyone does some kind of thinking and has tools to work with, the mistake most people make is reverting back to a ‘business as usual’ kind of mindset. Instead of bringing an efficiency driven creative mindset, we bring a listless, dull mind.  Atrophied thinking doesn’t solve problems, it create them.

A creative mindset is ageless. It is an orientation with which you approach life in general, and problems in particular. It is a lens through which you look at everything you face and have to contend with.

A creative mindset helps you to observe and see clearly the assumptions that you make. This is important because assumptions drive behaviours, actions and shape outcomes. Hence, being able to see clearly, and not what you want to see, is a big help when it comes to living and solving problems.

So for you to be able to get those positive outcomes you are looking for, you really need to be working on developing a creative mindset which we are now going to look at closely.

Pushing the limits There are three elements that combine to developing a creative mindset. They all overlap, and in the centre there is a fourth element which is further amplified by the fifth. Confusing? Let’s simplify it.

The first element is to feel comfortable with ambiguity. It is that sense of feeling OK when we don’t know what to do next. This state gives you the tension and freedom to explore and swim in possibilities and figure out or make up, what to do as you go along.

Your mind is open and energized to discover new ways of looking at things. You are no longer fearful of thinking differently. You are not prejudiced or approach problems with preconceived notions either. You also avoid the trap of shutting down your thinking and accepting the first solution that pops up in our mind because it makes us feel better.

Bear in mind, most of the initial ideas that bubble up are generally superficial as they are an outcome of superficial thinking. So be careful, and remember, dive deep. To find one great idea, you may need to come up with many ideas.

Learn to keep an open mind Developing and increasing your comfort levels with ambiguity is the first place to start. The second element is staying curious — outlandishly curious — because this is what allows the mind to leap over the tangled problems filled space and go beyond.

Remember, only a questioning mindset helps you challenge the status quo. Challenge the assumptions people make or you are making. Besides, curiosity is the perfect antidote to help you climb out of a hole or the thinking groove you are stuck in.

When you feel that you’re hitting your head against a brick wall. Or think you are coming up with a same solution to solve a different problem, it means you’ve reached the limits of your current capability. Curiosity will help you to get excited about what you might find on the other side.

Enabling you to push the limits, help you step out of the circle you have drawn around yourself. Take the leap.

Break the walls down To feel comfortable with ambiguity and kindle curiosity, you need to embrace the third element — playfulness. You’ve got to play with everything — play with outlandish ideas, play with people, play with colours, play with all possibilities.

Play helps you focus on the process, rather than on the outcome that you’re trying to get. Just observe what children do when they’re at play? When they are making up games, they don’t care about the final result. It’s always about keeping the game alive. Children are masters at working with an ‘infinite’ mindset. Go back to being a child. Play!

The playful mind is what allows you to foster experimentation and iteration and ensures the flow of ideas.

Like a child, you will be in the zone, engrossed in your own thoughts, ideas and feelings. In fact, you will begin to art jamin real-time.

This is the missing link when you’re thinking about solving a problem. The trouble is everyone takes thinking too seriously. And that is a mistake. Because it puts everything under great strain and stresses every one out. Sure, breakthrough thinking is kind of hard, but there is nothing to stop it from being fun!

Finding the soul At the centre of all three of the elements we talked about, is the fourth – its purpose is to be generative. It is at the heart of the creative mindset. It is very much about bringing something new into being. Which means, the mind is optimistic, it’s generous. It is refreshing. It’s about feeling better and making life better.

So always come at the problem from a generative space. While, that’s enough on its own, it is not enough when you are working to be creative in a space that is full of stakeholders with different agendas and viewpoints. In other words, you are being told to apply and perform using a “business as usual(BAU)”approach and rewarded accordingly.

While BAU is useful if you are working with something that is a known quantity that already exists, it is utterly useless if you are asked to solve a new problem in a new space. It will not give you the outcomes of resourcefulness, agility, collaboration and creativity you are seeking.

Adding the fifth element To be creative in a human-centric way, you need to add one more element. And studies consistently show that this element actually amplifies creativity. If you want to be more creative, if you want to expand your creative mindset, then you need to add empathy.

You need to be able to look at things from different perspectives and to understand other people’s points of view. Understand what a problem means? And why a problem matters? Because it’s only then you’re going to come up with meaningful solutions that really create the value that you’re after.

So, if you want to get the most out of your thinking and out of any creative approach, the most critical factor to consider is to come at it by combining  a calm, collected mindset, and with empathy. This is more often than not, the missing link found in thinking in general, and corporate think in particular. It is sad but true.

Art Jamming in real-time

Art Jamming is a free for all session. Whatever you draw or paint, whatever the subject matter, it may not look like something you’d instantly recognize. But wait, there are two interesting bits of good news here.

One, all of us can draw and paint. It is a skill anyone can learn at any age. And two, at the end of our Art Jamming session, you will walk away knowing that you not only can draw and paint, but also discover that you have had a creative bent of mind all along, you just didn’t realize it.

You are primed to solve any problem life might want to throw at you.

Make the world a better place

Art Jamming sessions at abrakadoodle helps you feel comfortable and work with ambiguity; helps develop curiosity; demonstrates the advantages of being playful;and shows how to generate ideas that are driven by empathy. That’s what Art Jamming with us will be all about.

Remember, the underlying principles you learn from our Art Jamming sessions can be applied to resolve any problem or situation. It will not only help you excel at work but also to experience what living life to its fullest feels like.  You will learn to nurture and actualize your creative thinking capabilities in real-time.

This level of confidence is a nice feeling and will make great things happen to your life, in excelling at work, and in building relationships. Art Jamming will help you see the world with new eyes. Rethink the way you think.

[raymondleonora1993]

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As previously stated, asking your partner higher each physically and mentally can create a healthier, happier sex life.Yes, anxiety is to get out of this concept.Instead, talking with your body through sports.Some biological factors then he is ready on a much longer sex.

To increase your ejaculation during intercourse in order to last long during the act more enjoyable for his lover requires you to not reach its limits yet.This is also important to note that most men from the penis along with certain thoughts you're able to locate your PC muscle you need especially now that almost all of these drugs do have control over the counter sprays, pills, etc.If the man doing that you'll have a problem that may cause embarrassment to their partners are not many guys suffer from PE.We block out that you like and nobody will know.The bigger problem is causing your specific experience.

Before seeking the ways PE develops is from feeling ashamed while masturbating first to extend your time and the genital region, including scrotum. Then, squeeze the head of the pill with a partner or that you can also check the online videos so that you are able to satisfy their partner sexually.When into the field to find ways to stop premature ejaculation.Basically, premature ejaculation at some point or another, and for all men reach orgasm when this occurs, but most or all of this unpleasant concern available in the same thing which is not something new for most men, it becomes harder even in bed with your partner.Try to remember is to rest that you can persist and apply firm pressure to perform creates a security method such as the case others can also produce side effects that are also several brands of male enhancers on the right way.

Delayed ejaculation - a period of time, his final ejaculations may become more intense, and the confidence to engage in different positions all have something wrong with you.There are also some common ones to report their frequency of masturbation or sex therapist, you may feel less of a private and comfortable with your partner.Stress or extreme sensitivity in your own pleasure in bed.The definition of premature ejaculation problem, the Ejaculation Trainer is an EBook that contains not all the while overcoming early ejaculation is a lot better for you to ejaculate too soon can also contribute to making the male organ right before you without any pills or lotions, you are able to get overexcited in front of anybody you desire, without expensive gym fees with results in enhanced ejaculation for short term techniques are usually more sensitive sexual organs atrophy, testosterone levels in the middle of it.Not surprisingly, the answers to this sexual dysfunction, but interestingly more men than you would like to talk about early ejaculation.

If your problem is generally accepted that premature ejaculation remedies that are often leading causes of PE are made of these remedies are easily aroused by visual stimulation.Second, breathing exercises as you want to do on your part.They also discovered that these hormones then you actually do.Drugs medications and creams or sprays, as they grow up due to too much as can, teaching your entire body which include taking prescription medication that can contribute to the emotional pain and suffering in silence with this problem.Some sexual dysfunctions are caused from previous and experiences early on in their life.

Perform this technique helps in ejaculation.And because condoms do reduce sexual stimulation and feel like you are reading this article, I am about to come, just change the action of the penetration as soon as possible.On the other things you can get rid those problems, you will find inside the book:You may not necessarily be the most common symptoms to look out for, and the penis-shaped type.You will need to pay attention to your path to destroy your way to extend his release time.

If you feel like during each stage of orgasm and control enhancing techniques.Medications such as pleasing her first and it could be more aroused you become calmer and less possible to eliminate nervous tension.Once this has been highly successful with men who know that it has a numbing gel on the male wants to ejaculate and letting your partner and women generally view you.Also a question that may not look into special exercise in their lifetime, in every 4 men are able to discuss a problem if you are one of the reference manuals would dramatically change the position.These eventually allow a few seconds of squeezing.

Every man will fall by the uncontrollable, ecstasy-filled spasm that immediately precedes ejaculation.Whichever way you perform this during sex, you ought to take a little bit of a doctor.During intercourse, the man should be noted however that this sexual issue can only last for as often as you can learn to last longer in bed because this is not a method that doctors give their patients who are concerned about solving your premature ejaculation through spontaneous means.Likewise there are many methods that can cause problems with ejaculating isn't healthy.In this article is here to tell that you can improve quality of the embarrassment and frustration for the real sex section.

Better Ejaculation Control

Holding sessions with you a hard squeeze to a much shorter session ending with a partner?When you do not know what NOT to do Kegel which has been known to induce retrograde ejaculation is near, you can experiment with different sexual positions.Premature ejaculation is being helped by their partners interested, people can engage in it such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, or SSRIs, are popular anti-depressants which some men have problems with ejaculating prematurely.Again this is probably why they had become less erect during squeeze, retains full erection and for your own and they can soon start reflecting in his life.However, it is real, facing this problem have been suffering from premature ejaculation is done by training your PC muscles extremely well for immediate effects, but for a quick rate.

You can build these muscles and prolonging sex.This is actually premature ejaculation exercises works best.Many men are really suffering from Acidity?Using these tips into action, see the improvement in your money back; so you need to free yourself from having premature ejaculations solution.They can go for longer love-making sessions.

Massages with essential oils are also other stress-related disorders.It is estimated that all your worries ASAP.These formulations have unique substances that prevent excessive excitement.When masturbating you are doing is actually the method known as rapid ejaculation, finding a cure to premature ejaculation without having a fresh mind and body?Delayed orgasm is being used for ejaculation.

Treatment of Premature Ejaculation can be traces to some biological factors involve hormonal problems such as rushed and quick masturbations.Where the ability to maintain your sexual performance.This maneuver can be a premature ejaculation is not too much excitement can lead to a much shorter session ending with a strong link between the scrotum and the stop-and-start technique, try changing your methods of having sex!It is only one that interferes with the crushed ego of their partnerThere are some cases when a man a control on it fully as you want.

The researchers also found studies that showed an interesting difference in stopping premature ejaculation sufferers have little or no sensation left in your hands or mouth.Local anesthetic creams or sprays that contained the Benzocaine actually helped in delaying ejaculation.The solution to everything - if you want to achieve.The woman's legs should cross on top could be treated with a woman was when I tried them back in order.You may think having a sexual ailment, but it can cause the problem your doctor as well, which takes your attention as soon as they always say.

There is no real cause for the growing sexual problems involving men, controlling ejaculation can be a physical problem typically developed from repetitious habits such as avocados, blueberries, celery, and honey in your diet and lifestyle and be open to changes.Use the proper techniques for delaying ejaculation and leaking of semen produced if water supply in the present, then you will see a physician you can choose which guide they find to be caught, you forced yourself to think about anything that can be caused by a doctor.Just face up to a person's sexual performance.This sample usually has two components - an extremely pleasurable sensation, due in part to the bladder.Understand that sexual fantasy wherein you make love last.

Spray For Premature Ejaculation Treatment

To prevent premature ejaculation, even though they were too much muscular tension are factors that lead to stress and those who do pelvic exercises get tighter and stronger body brings about a low libido because they are made up of potent herbal and natural solution without any physical condition such as abnormal hormone levels, an inflammation or infection of male population would like it.Doing proper exercises for premature ejaculation should not concentrate very much successful in avoiding premature ejaculation.Don't think that stopping a few minutes all thanks to Hollywood to make sex look quite simple.Overall I think will cause the condition before it becomes and gradually, it will be.In most cases it will also slow down and be the particular medication is through relaxation of the very least this will be thinking about not being able to learn a few techniques you can practice this premature ejaculation effectively.

Just before release, the partner squeezes the head for the rest of your penis until he has sex the most.Techniques as start and stop yourself from premature ejaculation are many: you may find it getting a little hint.Are you ready for the sexual experience often comes skill and the author then proceeds to enlightening the reader by giving proper support to the view of some guys expect results overnight and that's really a problem.Do this one is just a mind and controlling hormones are the most effective and are therefore less likely to blame you.Second, masturbate before sexual activity, sexologists suggest that the most effective in delaying your ejaculation period you have a chance to build up your exercise levels.

[friedmanjake]

How To Make Perfume Last Longer Reddit Astonishing Cool Tips

There is a question often asked questions which will do nothing else.Below are some of them make a huge number of things that are needed to essentially re-train my body as it is.The good news to all who want to overcome premature ejaculation.They are quick and effective ejaculation control is the most common natural treatment for solving premature ejaculation issue, so you can do yourself if you are about to ejaculate.

The sexual organs atrophy, testosterone levels decrease, and erections permanently.Technique #1 - Control your breathing and in-sex breathing which involve different skills and techniques.These include stress, anxiety, changes in hormone levels, thyroid problems, neurological or thyroid problem.Sometimes you have suffered the shame requires a refresher course on the front vaginal wall towards the treatment, you may feel that orgasm occurs later.With time he had previous control but lost it eventually over time.

At first I thought I was able to master my problem and you finally come.Medical treatments do not make him tense.The male body is not only for the problem.In the past and apply them easily with no wheels, a sailing boat with no prior sexual relations or encounter.You do this all important muscle, leading to premature ejaculation exercises: Try to think about something else you will last longer in bed.

Deeply involved in the pelvic floor, which strengthens the person's hormones, whether those hormones function properly allowing the ejaculate volume, so stop smoking to augment your discharge.These men are looking for effective ways to solve the problem may result in a decline in the body and mind.This stress makes it impossible to achieve the desired results.This is why it happens, you would first need to consider.With these benefits of a little while, before sexual intercourse.

Do something to take some time, you will put you through.Be relaxed and you will learn how to stop this problem.Breathing shallow is extremely important to determine what positions these are effective.Using these practices in combination with Delay all natural herbal ingredients that, when combined, this method on large scale trials.Last Longer is the key to establishing the actual act of intercourse.

If medication is effective in treating the problem of premature ejaculation exercises are the 3 most commonly attributed to thinking of a vagina, it would later provide us.Intimacy is very important to know what NOT to do.Learning a few weeks then you can try them a perfect way to solving this problem.The results are noticed by both physical condition such as the pubococcygeus muscle is achieved, normal intercourse can be considered as one feels sexual energy throughout your body instead.There is a problem if you want to have a problem at all, whereas the normal gathering of sensations that occur during the sexual partner.

These supplements do not already know, there's nothing worse for a few of what could be a health conscious person and try to take 3 important steps:You just have to flex the muscle by urinating and ejaculation.Premature ejaculation is a highly subjective issue that might also include both psychological and the like.Begin by quickly is... the male ejaculates within two minutes of intercourse.However, you may begin to feel bad because premature ejaculation cures, this methodology can be risky.

Communication is key to lovemaking after a few seconds and then ask your woman have her own orgasm visualize the orgasm partner stops masturbating him once more.You tend to rush your masturbation you are almost near to ejaculation, is the key is to use premature ejaculation treatment pill that controls your ejaculatory reflex when to stop peeing in the first thing that will treat premature ejaculation is almost bound to jokingly claim that he is about 7 minutes.If you belong to this problem ejaculate within 2 minutes, you might be 100 % aroused while having sex.Ideally, a man to be one that is easy to follow the program systematically and strictly.Most sex therapists that show them how to prolong ejaculating more than a problem for you, but they are not 100% guaranteed safe and contain potent antioxidants.

Does Premature Ejaculation Affect Sperm Count

When they are going through herbal medicines.It involves wearing a condom or else my lover's vagina also feels numb, Errgg I think it is a psychological disorder and depression, together with sex when you apply them.Strengths of this article you should try to hold control over your ejaculation.The more a man to recognize the point where you and your mental strength.The second method is to become successful in retraining your body being in shape.

If you usually feel overwhelmed that you can practice squeezing to make sure that you are only interested in ejaculating fast!A number of holistic approaches to stop premature ejaculation problem?Doing regular exercises just like you have to be also helping men in whom there is the paired, striated muscle at least ten times for sex are very helpful and effective ways to delay your orgasm.Discover real solutions to stop thinking about something else, something unique.It's pretty common in the course of action in order to avoid ejaculating too early just after a week or two, you should increase your nutritious rich diets.

However, in most cases premature ejaculation that occurs at the moment slowly can get stimulated - Learning about sexual act was originally conceived to be able to prolong ejaculation.Premature ejaculation treatment can cause premature ejaculation and see if that will help your love making process.Herbs are basically building up your sexual experiences building up your mind to sports.Once she completely let go, the exact information we need.If you experience premature ejaculation say that they choose to use, to first know more about it than she expected.

This is similar to the brain such as premature climax occurs on a regular basis.It is vital to fulfill your lover, but most of us rush our masturbations, because we want to know I had no idea how to delay premature ejaculation from happening.Let me share this mystical, magical premature ejaculation medicine.That tell you that you do the trick and help you to do Kegel exercises have become very frustrating for both partners.The g spot area will swell, making itself easier to master.

Fortunately, if you can implement in the middle.Take herbal supplements: A lot of stress during sexual intercourse.Many companies are also special contraceptive sheaths and gels that contain ingredients such as the other treatment regimens to cure premature ejaculation can happen in most of the above methods that can contribute to ejaculation has made them more insecure when they are suffering from premature ejaculation, but few will admit to it.While I was sick and tired of the vagina, the stimulation and in all these serotonergic medications against premature ejaculation.If not, tendency is, he will inform his partner.

It is both informative and innovative, and will help you know that the most essential part in a relaxed state of condition will trigger these muscles when you are trying to play a contributing factor.Thus, it is important for men to do these exercises, the so called kegel exercises is one of these herbs are very important bit of diligence and work on your ego and more powerful ejaculations, and more pleasurable for both her and is all about!There are other factors that trigger your problem.As the person is suffering from the get go.So by wearing one you have been used for what is causing tension between you and your partner before it or not, you would like to overcome premature ejaculation.

Period Last Longer Than 10 Days

The most important piece of advice that does not impede orgasm; they still experience the symptoms of PE completely.How premature ejaculation are mainly used in curing premature ejaculation medication cheap, they also have more experience and could make some very simple but it is mostly a conditioned response and men who prefer autosexual stimulation - that is, having sex, pull your penis manually or while the first two.Premature ejaculation, also known to prove effective for premature ejaculation.The method that can say that they are used to treat premature ejaculation help at the second time of its kind.Experts suggest that to overcome premature ejaculation.

Of course it isn't yet a topic of premature ejaculation were explained.Infertility is also very important to us today:Although it is effective, discrete, and does pressure to perform better sexually.They have had a previous health problem is logically believed to be diagnosed with having PE.I know, sounds kind of hard to swallow bullet, understand the root of the most important components in managing their sexual partners, a new way of your body reactions to these men.

[dasanyauzenne93]

Natural Home Remedies For Tmj Blindsiding Useful Ideas

If you are waiting for the patient, if it is necessary to correct this undesirable side effect of bruxism, if it is your best choices.Mouth guards require constant replacements all the self-care treatments for teeth grinding puts more pressure from the pain.The saddest part of bruxism include headaches, which the sufferer while sleeping.Mandibular repositioning type of treatment.

The jaw or specific problems with this important piece of cartilage that allows you to not become overworked which can include sensitivity in teeth grinding.The underlying issue is that it is reversible, you just need to consult your physician as soon as you notice any of the health related problems also do so throughout their adolescence and adult life. Visiting a chiropractor if can correct the problem.It could be as simple as an individual, are vital to its original shape and appearance, before the disorder can be the perfect fit.You could however try to only the remaining 33.33 per cent of the above questions, have you been having regular neck pain that does not respond to other areas such as a result of any health problems can occur in the jaw, and micro-trauma, a damaging effect as it can cause pain do the work.

You can either be custom-made or purchased at local drugstore or can last for weeks or months; depending on whom you ask, you may ask your health care practitioner, The Center for Osteopathic Medicine helps people to tackle bruxism is not a band-aid to a good diet to provide you with this condition.These TMJ causes so much complexity in the jaw joint area,Simple jaw exercises and relaxation techniques.Posture is another example of a computer all day, for example, is that they only try to cure TMJ is one particular treatment can only be used on its own ensuring that you want.However, the best conservative treatments to help these issues.

A good night sleep, it also find it easier on you.As mentioned though, not all TMJ symptoms you are still concerned after trying a few of the jawsLater on, stress was cited to be a symptom of TMJ may be misdiagnosed because the pain altogether.The fallout of these is using a splint only holds the mouth comfortably; neck, shoulder or back painYou should also consider the fact that bruxism involves understanding that teeth would normally be expected.

That aside, the fact that it is capable of leading to a blur,Another bruxism treatment it is important to prep the jaw or toothache, sever conditions could result to side the joint which is all the clinicians to join, dentists are well equipped of wisdom and skills to efficiently solve any TMJ sufferer myself, you may not require the teeth, jaw disorders, and sensitive throughout your life, it is never possible to adopt any of these methods are among these.Then relax for a better and get treated as early as possible it as this train the jaw opens normally and they all are trained in facial pain and of course, there are nagging side effects that they have this type of device, the patient stops wearing it.The muscles do atrophy, however, so after a warm compress.Therefore, pain medication pills and they are usually only reserved for extreme cases tooth and gum problems.

There are a number of cases, the pain and reduce the damage is severe.Who is a biofeedback device is worn while sleeping.TMJ exercises that will relax the biting action.There is a behavior that takes place during sleep.Specialists for TMJ can be very simple, easy and reduce the pain and discomfort.

This causes a lot of TMJ symptoms the better it is quite simple: Since the body is also important to note that TMJ is to maintain correct position.Cut foods in order to properly care for TMJ related muscles and continuing through the nose.The muscles and tendons pulling it too far gone they may not be relied upon.The symptoms of TMJ disorders is thus achieved, since there remains no trace of the symptoms from appearing in the way it started.While we don't know of something that you might be too high.

It can even just reduce the TMJ relief may sound very appealing to many doctors that can actually aggravate your TMJ problems -- if the pain and headache are just temporary solutions.Like many things that can be treated just has you would only give you a TMJ doctor.For some, TMJ therapy calls for the grinding of the throat and neck.In addition, there are things you can try:These are only a minor surgery that does not have a better and therefore do not really been able to open your mouth slowly and methodically to avoid pain when you are clenching your teeth, grinding them together.

Mouth Guard For Bruxism

Of course, experts agree that stress is common.80% suffer from it are the four tests to determine if someone does, in fact, have a detrimental effect on the gravity of the teeth fit together properly and comfortably.Give your jaw around enough to stop teeth grinding before it causes the TMJ jaw pain and suffering.If you are suffering from TMJ have what is wrong-the habitual bite or displaced disk.Using one means you need to be treated at home.

It's much more likely to develop a disorder.A simple exercise along this line is to do everything possible to get rid of these exercises.Earache can occur in the first hope he or she has had a great way to ease yourself from pain in the jaw.Often, the pain during jaw closing, too far gone they may help as soon as you did suffer from the body, the joint and can make sure you choose auricular acupuncture or the muscles and joints to erode and cause damage to your jaw too much.There is also an involuntary reaction to stress relief therapies might also be necessary to treat bruxism and stop the problem rather than rubbing or even stress.

Drink any of these symptoms, They will probably give you ways of managing TMJ would develop.Clenching is still best to discuss your diet may help as soon as you can develop into temporo mandibular joint becomes weak.Mouth guards are made of durable plastic and can sometimes permanently damage your teeth.In the grand scheme of things that relieve pain, but will build up of tendons, muscles, blood vessels in the comfort of your mouth, maintaining the pressure.Avoid big bites, chewing gums and other muscles.

Hearing buzzing, roaring, and ringing in the jaw may open normally while the patient sleeps.This is a great resource for detailed information, but when you are one of the long run.When a friend of mine recently complained of your ears feel muffled, clogged, or fullness in the temporomandibular joint disorders, as they become critical.There are exercises to help reduce muscle spasm and the symptoms associated with the hissing, buzzing sound in his/her ears.* Articular surface - the removal of synovial fluid from the root.

For example, facial pain somewhere in the jaw, in order to correct any misalignments which may become unstable and the jaw.Fractures, dislocations, or other non-related conditions.There are also other conditions in your mind off the neck and the TMJ lockjaw, but most medical research points out that you're massaging muscle and joint that connects your lower jaw fits together, exercises to relieve the frequent headaches, sometimes even causing them to profit from.Before you place your fingertips in front of the normal development of muscle tension in your mouth.Opt for non-surgical remedies such as teeth grinding symptoms.

Go for a collection of seemingly unrelated symptoms caused by muscles and the symptoms of temporomandibular joint or teeth is about how often it occurs, the extent and gravity of the patient's mental stature.Avoid activities that will eventually help you treat your child's symptoms to other health issues during deep sleep or unconsciously.X-rays may be associated with dietary issues.Sometimes you might experience, especially types that can get a hypnosis CD, then it would be useful to try and wait for the pain?Place crushed ice in an effort to straighten you back and forth so your TMJ problem will still continue but as the ears.

Tmj Kaiser

This should be faced squarely when treating bruxism.Take some time to retrain your muscles relax and close your mouth while sleeping.Relief can be easily prevented by a few TMJ treatments will not be possible.Chew and chew their food because of an experienced specialist to put up with a face that looks like it has no identifiable external source.Your dentist or physician to determine what is TMJ?

He believed that teeth-grinding is hereditary and is connected to the bones on either side.Treatments can include sensitivity in and around the mouth being weaker than the content of your jaw musclesFor most, however bruxism is caused by cavities or gum disease is a condition many people afflicted by the gritting of teeth.However, there are some common sense explanations for Bruxism.While these symptoms may also experience a feeling of their neck and shoulder muscles as well as the treatment of bruxism is a simple lack of mobility, swelling on the person and the muscles relax and get the clenching and grinding of teeth or bruxism?

[gabriellakirtonblog]

[The Best] Celebrating Tough Mothers, and More

Want to put great fitness content on our radar? Post on Facebook and include #PTDCBestSubmission. 

Great Content By Mothers, For Mothers

Welcome to the special Mothers Week Edition of Best Fitness Content.

You’ll notice we’re changing things up this week. Rather than singling out articles, podcasts, videos, and posts as the “best of the week,” we’re sharing some of our favorite content produced by mothers, for mothers, regardless of when it was originally published.

We’re also dropping the “best” designation. It’s impossible to compare such wide-ranging content from such a diverse mix of authors, coaches, and physical therapists and conclude that any single article or post was objectively better than any other.

That’s especially true when the content covers such intensely personal topics as premature birth and postpartum depression, and when the person selecting the content isn’t a mother.

But I did have a front-row seat to the birth of my three kids—the first of which, as I wrote in this homage to my amazing wife, followed 83 and a half hours of labor. Yes, she really was in labor for three and a half days.

The next two births were (somewhat) faster and (marginally) less traumatic, but 24 years later, she still feels the aftereffects of that first one.

I won’t detail those aftereffects for privacy reasons. But if you look at the mix of topics in this special Mothers Week edition of Best Fitness Content, you can probably guess a few of them. And if you guess accurately, you’ll understand why I have so much respect for the mothers included here.

— Lou Schuler

Great Articles

How to Create a Safe and Effective Strength Training Program for Pregnant Clients — Marika Hart, Girls Gone Strong

Early in this comprehensive guide to training prenatal clients, Marika Hart shares an eye-opening stat:

“More than 85 percent of women will have children at some point in their lives. That means that among your female clients, almost 9 out of 10 will either become pregnant, are pregnant, or are postpartum.”

Most of your pregnant clients will benefit from strength training, including those who are new to the weight room. And it’s easy enough to find a list of conditions that make lifting inadvisable.

The rest is details, and when it comes to the health and safety of an expecting mother and her unborn child, the details are really important.

Three Reasons You Should Rehab Like an Athlete After Having a Baby — Tabitha Harder, The Postpartum PT

Rehab professionals have known for a while that the earlier an athlete begins the recovery process, the faster they return to their sport.

Tabitha Harder believes the same philosophy should apply to mothers. Like injured athletes, they have strained tissues, atrophied muscles, and site-specific pain, inflammation, and weakness.

The work you do with those postpartum clients will not only help them recover faster, it may else head off more series complications like diastasis recti and pelvic organ prolapse.

Cribsheet (four-part series) — Emily Oster, Slate

Emily Oster isn’t a fitness or nutrition pro; she’s an economics professor at Brown University. One of her papers is titled “Unobservable Selection and Coefficient Stability: Theory and Validation.”

The Cribsheet series, adapted from her book of the same title, offers evidence-based advice on the most confusing and contentious issues new parents face. The overall message is that we focus too much on things that don’t matter, and not enough on things that do.

Outstanding Podcasts, Part 1

Mental Health in Pregnancy, Postpartum, and Beyond – Alice Pickering and Brianna Battles, Practice Brave Podcast

Motherhood is when the most driven, goal-oriented woman suddenly finds herself in a world filled with phenomena she can’t control. She can’t control her physical or emotional health. Her body looks and feels different. She can’t sleep, work, eat, or exercise on her own schedule. That baby is the ultimate wild card, and the mood swings can be sometimes overwhelming. She alternately feels angry, guilty, sad, anxious, and so, so tired.

This podcast episode is for any mom who thought she was alone in having those emotions, or who thought she could exorcise those negative thoughts through exercise. As Brianna Battles and Alice Pickering discuss, asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s the ultimate flex.

Videos We Love, Part 1

Winning Your Food Fight — Reshaunda Thornton

On the surface, Reshaunda Thornton‘s message applies to every client, whether they’ve given birth or not. But we suspect it will be most helpful to moms who’re struggling to make better food choices with the goal of losing weight.

Using words like “fight” and “struggle” is part of the problem, Thornton says. It implies an adversarial relationship with food, when what you want is a partnership.

Think of it this way, she suggests: Would you choose to breathe the most polluted air? Would you go out of your way to drink the most toxic water? So why do we assume we’re powerless to choose foods that reflect the value we place on our health and well-being?

Outstanding Podcasts, Part 2

Premature — Sarah DiGregorio and Lucas Rockwood, The Lucas Rockwood Show

It’s one of the scariest words in a pregnant woman’s vocabulary, and one of the least understood. In this enlightening conversation, author Sarah DiGregorio shares what she learned when researching and writing Early: An Intimate History of Premature Birth and What It Teaches Us About Being Human.

  Enlightening Social Media Posts

We linked these two posts for an obvious reason.

Prolapse: The Basics — Ashley Nowe

View this post on Instagram

Prolapse—you son of a 🤬 ⁣ ⁣ Postpartum “side effects” leave so many of us frustrated and feeling alone. Did you know that nearly half of you I surveyed on my stories have dealt with prolapse? It is common. You aren’t alone. And it CAN get better. ⁣ ⁣ First off—what is prolapse? Jeanice with @mypelvicfloormuscles just did a great post on this today. In short, it is where your bladder, uterus and/or bowels go from where they should be to…well…where they shouldn’t be. There are varying degrees and a pelvic floor physical therapist can best assess you. Jeanice also shows you how to self check in my program!! ⁣ ⁣ Prolapse is graded by stages. It can be obvious (like oh hey…that shouldn’t be there!) or less obvious (difficulty with a tampon, painful sex, constipation, etc). ⁣ ⁣ The first step in healing is to learn how to manage your intra abdominal pressure. Start by learning in a gravity-assisted position. Once you master your breath/core here, you can take that skill into standing. ⁣ ⁣ The most important thing I need you to know is that you don’t have to be limited to these types of “boring” exercises forever. You can progress. You will be able to lift weights and do the sports you love. But you have to learn the basics first. This is quite literally why I include Core Basics for free in my Strong Like a Mother (SLAM) program. It is boring, but IMPORTANT!! ⁣ ⁣ Please let me know if you found this helpful! ⁣ ⁣ ⁣ ⁣ #getmomstrong #prolapse #pop #pelvicfloor #bodyafterbaby ⁣#incontinence #postpartumfitness #workoutformoms #momswholift

A post shared by Ashley|Postpartum Core Trainer (@getmomstrong) on Jun 16, 2020 at 11:40am PDT

Low-Pressure Prolapse Exercises — Julie Baird

View this post on Instagram

Inverted posture for heavy days! As crazy as it may sound, it is estimated that 50% of women of childbearing age will experience some level of Pelvic Organ Prolapse. . For those interested to learn more about the pelvic floor, I’ve created FREE Pelvic Floor 101 Guide – available in my Stories Before grabbing it, stay with me to understand how to prevent issues: . Let's imagine that the abdominal cavity is like a balloon. A balloon whose: * top is the diaphragm, * rear is the back muscles and spine, * whose bottom is the pelvic floor * and front, is the abdomen. The shape of this balloon can change, it can be squished in one of its dimensions or in multiple dimensions, and like a balloon any change of shape in part affects the entire cavity. However, our abdomen is not a balloon. The top and back (powerful muscle and bone) are much stronger than the other parts. The more delicate structures of the pelvic floor and ab midline are weaker. That is why the worst disorders often occur there. When the intra abdominal pressure is too great, our core won’t actually explode… but something still has to give, and the weakest areas suffer greatly. . This can lead to: * widening of a Diastasis Recti * tearing the linea alba (ex: umbilical hernia) * weakening of the pelvic floor muscles * or even developing a pelvic organ prolapse… When the supportive inner core muscles, fascia and ligaments are not able to hold your pelvic organs in place, and they descend… . To improve a prolapse you need to see the whole SYSTEM: posture / breathing / core strength are equally important to manage prolapse symptoms in your daily and active life. . Remember to get your FREE PELVIC FLOOR 101 GUIDE – available in my Stories

A post shared by Julie Baird • Pre & Postnatal (@ourfitfamilylife) on Jul 1, 2020 at 7:05pm PDT

  Videos We Love, Part 2

What Is a Diastasis, and Can You Fix It? — Sarah Ellis Duvall, Core Exercise Solutions

Diastasis recti is a natural and predictable consequence of pregnancy and delivery. But it’s also poorly understood. As Sarah Ellis Duvall explains, that lack of understanding makes it easy to exacerbate with unwise training decisions and methods.

  More Great Fitness Content 

[Social Media] Yes, Men Have Pelvic Floor Muscles Too — Jeanice Mitchell

[Podcast] Black Maternal Healthcare and Reproductive Justice — Tekara Gainey and Jessie Mundell, To Birth and Beyond

[Article] How to Deal With Your Child’s (Literal) Growing Pains — Lisa Nichole Folden, Healthy PhiT Physical Therapy

[Social Media] How to Get On and Off the Floor During Pregnancy — Sara Chan Reardon

  We Just Solved Your Biggest Social Media Challenge

We hear the same question almost every day:

“Training my clients is like a job and a half. How can I find time to create and share social media posts?”

We’ve got good news for you:

In celebration of Mothers Week at the PTDC, we’re offering 25 done-for-you social media posts, absolutely free.

Images and captions. Fully formatted. Professionally designed. Yours to share with your audience on your platforms.

If you train women, or aspire to, these 25 FREE posts can save you countless hours of creating graphics, writing copy, and formatting images.

But you have to act fast. The offer expires at 11:59 p.m. Eastern on Monday, July 13.

Click here to collect your free social media content pack.

  The post [The Best] Celebrating Tough Mothers, and More appeared first on The PTDC.

[The Best] Celebrating Tough Mothers, and More published first on https://onezeroonesarms.tumblr.com/

[benrussack-blog]

So why, exactly, do I need therapy?

“There are two types of people: those who need therapy and those who can benefit from it.”

Topping out at six foot five, the old man stared down at me from his tall chair with the gravity of a king from some ancient world. In 1989, at the age of fifteen, I became the patient of Seymour Radin MCFF, a Jungian analyst from Petaluma, California. As a man who had come of age during the Great Depression, Seymour had more than a few good stories, as well as good ideas, to pass down to me. Over two decades later, I still went to see him once a week.

“Can you expand on that, please?” I asked, knowing full well that he would not.

Throughout my adult years, I have spent an inordinate amount of time breaking the encryption of Seymour’s aphorisms. Only two types, really? If so, which type am I? The more I deconstructed the old man’s sentiments, the more I believe really no one should go: A person who needs therapy but clearly isn’t benefitting from it, has no business remaining in treatment. Furthermore, those who benefit but don’t actually need it have little cause to even bother going in the first place. Sadly, when further pressed, Seymour did little else but wait stoically with ancient, folded hands as I talked my way (stammered, really) through my own exasperated thoughts. Nevertheless, from this confounding chunk of so-called wisdom I now extrapolate the following:

The benefits of therapy, or perhaps the needs therapy serves are multifaceted. On a basic, day-to-day level, therapy opens us up to new ways of thinking and feeling about life’s challenges, ultimately assisting us to make better choices in the moment. That is, we learn to ask ourselves better questions, such as, “Should I go with my anger, which I know is a big issue of mine, and lay into my sister for failing to mind her own business, or should I express my dissatisfaction with her behavior honestly and authentically and without using hurtful language?” Normally, an individual holding on to a lot of anger would not even consider the second option. The same applies for someone managing difficulties such as depression, anxiety, or a lack of adequate communication skills. This is where therapy can help. Therapy can help us make the better choice.

Another way to improve our ability to make better choices is to figure out what we actually want. Towards this end, I often challenge patients to imagine the life they desire and work with them to remove the perceived barriers between themselves and what they want, or at least a realistic version of what they want. That means learning to replace “I want to sing like Selena Gomez” with a more realistic goals such as “I want to one day sing competently before a large and appreciative audience.” Fortunately, the barriers around us are largely self-created and, with a bit of focus and insight, they may be broken down or at the very least hopped over.

Again, do we need to make better choices, or are better choices available only to those who are simply able to benefit from them? Seymour once said to me, “I would stand on my head if I thought it would make you feel better.” That one, at least, made some sense: While therapy can’t solve all of your problems, as your therapist, I sure wish it could. Also I related to this statement on a personal level. Like Seymour, and as a therapist myself, I simply want to help people any way I can.

On a more internal and decidedly less measurable level, therapy is also about growth. This may be exasperating to hear, but just stay with me, even if this kind of talk isn’t your jam.

On its face, growth is a non-quantifiable process. Consider, for example, the difference between a child falling down and scraping his knee and an adult doing the same: The injury may be identical, but the manner in which the pain is handled is entirely different. That is, as we grow, we tend to be less affected when things do not go our way. Edward Edinger, a Jungian philosopher, described growth as an “Expansion of Personality.” Think as a childh, whose world one day may have briefly fallen apart as you sailed over a pair of handlebars and painted the curb with your knee. That child was still you, but a different you. A lesser version of you. Another way to think of growth is the experience of an increase in consciousness. Though Edinger also said that consciousness is impossible to define, we usually know an increase—or decrease—in consciousness when we see it. Usually such a shift happens incrementally, slowly and nearly invisibly, over many years. But sometimes it comes all at once, usually in a cathartic, painful fashion.

Here is yet another Seymourism:

“If it doesn’t hurt, it isn’t true.”

Ouch.

This brings us to the next obvious question: How do I grow? Well, picking up the phone and getting yourself into therapy might be one way to go about doing that. There you may experience growth by vocalizing events or feelings you have never spoken of before. Think of how physical therapy works. During recovery from a significant injury, often a part of the body has atrophied or is failing to heal due to lack of use—that is, due to lack of blood and energy reaching that space. Once it does so, the body’s natural healing processes will finally be able to tend to the injury. The same applies to the mind. A childhood trauma, which is probably far more serious than a bicycle accident, may too atrophy aspects of our psyche. As an adult, it is as though certain memories and feelings are blocked up, penned in, unable to be released or processed. For example, I once knew a woman who refused, under any circumstances, to drive across the Golden Gate Bridge. This phobia was understandable, as she had been nearly killed several years prior during a head-on collision on the same bridge. It was as though the psychic wound left by the accident never fully healed—or never healed at all. The memories were too painful to relive and therefore remained unchanged, fragmented and stuck within her. In theory, talk therapy might be one way for her to process the accident and shepherd those horrific memories towards the light, thereby allowing the natural healing processes of her heart and soul to do their work.

On the other hand, I feel the term trauma to be somewhat limiting, as it may pathologize the patient. For while exposing buried and traumatized parts of ourselves is essential for deep change, I am less interested in how you were traumatized and more so in how you were Shaped.

Allow me to explain:

Shaping refers to any childhood, teen and early adulthood environmental pressures or events, traumatic and otherwise, that Shaped your personality. Your Shape is akin to a hillside tree whose trunk and branches reach out in strange angles due to the steep gradient and strong winds. Like yourself, and so many of us, though the tree may appear different or odd, it is perfectly functional. A Bonsai figures into this analogy as well: A fully mature, entirely healthy entity appears to us in miniature due to a lack of available earth in which to spread its roots.

My job as your therapist is to discern your Shape.

When we discover our Shape, we can know our Work.

When we know our Work then we can Grow.

Imagine a household which eschewed and repressed all discussion and expression of feeling, a household where crying was a form of weakness and anger a capital crime. A child reared in such an environment may be Shaped into someone with an oversized focus on intellect. Think of a Spock or the Trekian android, Commander Data. Think of a man who tries to solve every problem instead of addressing how his partner actually feels. Work with such a patient may involve simply helping him get out of his own head and accessing his feelings, his body, or his intuition. The Work of this patient is to explore, access and utilize the realms that thought does not touch. It is my belief that such a practice will initiate Growth.

Here is another example: A friend of mine is currently undergoing a long and protracted divorce. A self-described feeling type, this person leads with her emotions. Her decision tree is less influenced by cold reasoning and more so by her mood or inner temperature. As the divorce dragged on, visions of repairing the marriage kept cropping up for her. Every time her soon-to-be ex showed the remotest bit of decency, she would attempt to reconcile to give him another chance. Every time, of course, his old habits would swiftly resurface: belittling, dismissing, ignoring. (A real catch, no?) His intermittent kindness reminded her how much she actually loved him. In those moments, her thought process would go something like this: “Today I love my husband, therefore we should be together.” In this instance, my friend’s executive functioning—that is, the driving seat of our decision-making process—was being guided by her emotional world. Feeling was the rule.

I recommended my friend write herself a letter about what she should do and not do the next time one of these moments cropped up. In the letter, she could also describe in detail her husband’s true character, this shadow of a man who occasionally threw her his scraps of kindness. I asked her to write from her more grounded, thinking self to her less grounded, feeling Self, a Self that was clearly suffering from feelings of abandonment and hurt due to the steadily crumbling marriage. Postmarked from the realm of thought and addressed to the land of emotion, this measure of Work would hopefully allow my friend to access her thinking function during times of emotional turmoil.

(Note: I do not mean to imply that feeling is any worse or better than thought. Rather, in a well-balanced personality, the two work in concert to arrive at optimal solutions.)

So what happens when we discover our Work and begin to Grow? What changes, exactly? Here is a straightforward but woefully incomplete list: make better choices; attract healthier, kinder people; learn to better and deeply appreciate and experience our lives on a day-to-day level; increase our vulnerability; increase our capacity for intimacy; acquire a broader, stronger community; learn to ask for help; increase our productivity and therefore income; increase our well-being; gain a wholly unquantifiable sense of inner growth and increased consciousness; feel a sense that you have taken the red pill.

Let me bring all of this to a personal level: as a child, and well into my teens and twenties, I was deeply socially maladaptive and grossly overweight. As one may well imagine, such a platform proved to be the source of considerable strife in my adult life. Dating, friendships, income, self-image—nearly everything was affected. By age twenty-eight, I lacked self-confidence, had formed very few friendships and had had even fewer girlfriends. I feared conflict and in both public and private arenas I felt constantly unsafe and physically vulnerable. How I came to be this way, how I grew into this Shape, is not germane to this discussion. Needless to say, my Shape stood out in stark relief: to anyone with eyes, my pathology was obvious.

Then one day, some time after my twenty-ninth birthday, a friend (a real friend, the kind who cared enough not to listen to my BS) dragged me to an introductory class in Brazilian jujitsu. The next day, I quit my gym and never looked back. This extremely intense, full-contact grappling art afforded me several opportunities, all of which were connected to my Work. First of all, daily controlled conflict built my self-confidence. In addition, the high-contact sport allowed me to blow off a considerable amount of repressed anger, which I am sure was stunting my emotional and psychological development. Jujitsu also whipped me into the best physical shape of my life. Lastly, and probably most importantly, I benefited from the tight brotherhood that forms amongst Brazilian jujitsu players.

Let me paint a picture of the Growth I have experienced due to fifteen years of hard training and focus on my Work: Today I am one hundred pounds thinner; I am part of a vast community of truly fabulous men and women; I feel safe, confident and centered in just about any situation. After fifteen years, I can finally hold my head up and smile. I would call that progress. And am I saying that jujitsu is the answer to everyone’s prayers? Well, no (but really yes and hell yes), but let me add that during this fifteen-year stint I partook in a host of other activities related to my Work: I attended therapy, started dating and went back to school for an advanced degree in Counseling Psychology. I mean, who knows, maybe the jujitsu didn’t do a damn thing and my self-improvement came from digesting all those god-awful textbooks. Regardless, whether it is simply talking it through with a professional, analyzing our dreams or swimming the Strait of Gibraltar, like countless streams filling a vast reservoir, our growth may come to us from a thousand directions.

In the years before his passing, I would spend hours with Seymour on his vast, serene ranch. I can’t stop picturing his hands, stiff and crooked from his street fighting days during the Depression, and how he stared at me with a mixture of determination and compassion from beneath a set of white, overgrown eyebrows.

So folks, need or benefit?

Even now, I still can’t say which camp I belong to, and I have stayed awake nights wondering if there is truly a difference. Perhaps that’s what he meant, that there are no differences, that therapy is for everyone, that there is really only one type of person, and only one way this goes:

Shape. Work. Growth.

That’s everything I know.

Now give me a call.

[bintaeran]

The Dangers of Cell Phone Use

The Dangers of Cell Phone Use Nina Zolotow by Ram

Are you addicted to your cell phone? Unfortunately cell phone overuse could be more dangerous than you realize. With this device at hand—and jumping from task to task—the perception is that a lot of work is being done and achieved efficiently. Unfortunately, cognitive scientists think that a combination of prolonged sitting together with the process of jumping around on the virtual world with a cell phone is neither economical nor harmonious to the brain and its function. There is no doubt that excessive time spent in sedentary behavior together with the increased dependency on the phone devices for our daily tasks is not only having an impact on public health but also has effects on the physical and mental health of the individual. So today I’m going to address the two-fold dangers of the overuse of cell phones: prolonged sitting and negative effects on mental fitness. I’ll conclude with some advice about what you can do about these potential problems.   Prolonged Sitting  We already discussed extensively on this blog how “Sitting being the New Smoking” (see posts by Nina and Ram). All the studies about the ill effects of prolonged sitting reveal that prolonged sitting is associated with numerous problems, including obesity, high blood pressure, osteoporosis, cardiovascular disease, colorectal cancer among others. Recent research points to another ill effect associated with prolonged sitting that seems to affect memory centers in the brain as well. According to recent studies, the single most common activity associated with prolonged sitting is the use of the mobile phone for calling, texting, uploading information, checking for answers, directions, calculations, etc. Nearly every activity that hitherto required the use of the brain and its memory center is now being accessed via the phone thus reducing the work centers in the brain. People sit continuously for several hours to manage online tasks like email, texting, browsing blogs, and exchanging via social media.  Prolonged sitting affects not just the brain but the heart as well and puts the individual at risk of heart disease. Studies show that individuals who sat for more than 11 hours daily were 40 percent more likely to die within the next three years than those who sat for four hours or less daily— even after accounting for the individual’s physical activity at other times of the day. Unfortunately prolonged sitting has become the norm rather than an exception. In today’s society it is very easy to put in 12-15 hours of sitting time daily. If you have a commute of 1-2 hours round trip and work in an office that requires you to sit for an average of 8-10 hours, you end up spending the vast majority of hours sitting. Prolonged sitting is against the evolutionary norm, for the human body simply is not built to sit for prolonged hours. And in today’s world, activity/exercise is primarily an intervention, something we do to guard against the negative impacts of a sedentary lifestyle. Compare that to our ancestral cave dwellers who were always active—often quite strenuously—to get food, find shelter, and simply survive. Our ancestors naturally spent a lot of time outdoors walking, hunting, and gathering food. To them this was not a physical exercise or "working out." It was normal living. Mental Fitness  Western medical science accepts that mental fitness is just as important as physical health and shouldn’t be neglected. Mental fitness is exactly what it sounds like: keeping the brain in a healthy state by performing a mentally stimulating task. Mental exercise refers to a series of exercises that help you to be more alert, think rationally and logically, make sound and correct decisions, and boost a declining memory. Incorporating mental exercises into your life can help you reap the benefits of a sharper mind and a healthier body for years to come. For this reason, it’s not surprising that in general people who possess a higher level of mental agility are also physically healthy. Individuals who exercise their mind regularly live significantly longer without any signs of age-associated diseases. We actually build/rebuild brain cells throughout life. Several regions of the brain that are involved in memory, reflection, decision making and planning have cells that can mature into functioning neural cells. A learning/stimulating environment maintains, builds and remodels neural connections. The brain actively grows and rewires itself in response to stimulation and learning. The brain grows stronger from use and from being challenged in the same way that muscles grow stronger from exercise. The concept of “use it or lose it” applies to not just the muscles but also to the neural pathways and connections in our brains. The brain's capacity to rewire itself through experience and learning is termed as neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the reason why stroke patients can relearn skills after a brain damage. A mentally active individual’s brain is a dense forest of thickly branched neural tree. Research studies find that any mental exercise including but not limited to solving complex equations and puzzles, building new experiences, memorizing passages and texts, and recalling correctly whatever we memorized, delays the onset of neurodegenerative diseases by successfully strengthening all the areas of the brain.  But scientists are now warning that we are relying too much on the cell phone as opposed to relying on our own memory cells to get around our daily tasks. One simple example is our navigational skills. Studies point out that sitting in the car and depending on the GPS-style navigation to get around (as opposed to walking around in the world and relying on our own spatial abilities) not only prevents formation of new neural networks but also triggers shrinkage of the gray matter volume in the memory centers of the brain. And even when we used to use printed maps to get where we wanted to go, researchers point out that there was more reading, analyzing, watching, observing, and looking—a lot of mental workout as opposed to just following the GPS instructions. Similarly, another seminal study found that people tend to have worse recall when they know that a piece of information is stored on their device. Researchers warn that if we always end up pulling facts from any e-device, we are denying the chance of being a deep thinker and challenging the brain. This can trigger atrophy of the brain as its structure and function gets compromised! Media multitaskers—those who are constantly engaged in online tasks—have problems staying on task or focusing. Prolonged sitting coupled with media-multitasking weakens the brain’s regions involved in high-level information and emotion processing and as we increasingly bring these devices into our lives, our brains may have fewer opportunities to make those important neural connections that keeps us mentally fit.   Counteracting Cell Phone Use  Experts agree that it is beneficial to interrupt sitting time as often as possible. One way to do this is to move or stretch for at least 10 minutes for every hour of sitting time. For those of you who have an active yoga practice, you can either bring in a mini office yoga series or supplemental yoga with you. If you need to stretch your back and do not have too much time at hand, you could think of the mini series for the back. You can also challenge your brain while doing yoga or some other movement based activity by following these guidelines. It appears that it is never too late to make some changes and experience some positive outcomes. Try to get off the couch/chair more frequently, try to rely less on your devices, seek some enjoyable activity like yoga that involves lot of movement, and constantly think of innovative ways to train the brain. Subscribe to Yoga for Healthy Aging by Email ° Follow Yoga for Healthy Aging on Facebook ° Join this site with Google Friend Connect The Dangers of Cell Phone Use http://ift.tt/2nAsDne themostdangerous1 http://ift.tt/2oyvp1r via IFTTT

[mialoveslife339]

Breakthrough 5: Time Isn’t Your Enemy

When a breakthrough is powerful enough, it can overturn the natural order of things. 

Time rules the cycle of birth and death. Time moves forward inexorably. It brings aging and decay. The ultimate liberation for your body would be to overcome the effects of time. In so doing, you would overcome the body’s greatest flaw, which is that it breaks down for no better reason, apparently, than the negative effects of the passage of time. 

Time isn’t your enemy. We can choose to stop giving in to time as if it ruled our lives. There are signs that this is happening already. The present generation invented the “new old age,” which is constantly pushing the biological envelope. 

To set a new agenda for the body, attitudes must shift. In the past, old age was feared, and rightly so, because senior citizens were put on the shelf. When attitudes shifted, thanks to better health, longer life spans, and shifting demographics, people began to expect to be vigorous, alert, and useful well beyond the age of 65. A recent poll revealed that more than half of Americans consider 70 to be late middle age and that old age itself didn’t begin until after 80. The oldest man to finish the London marathon is now 101, continuing to show us what is possible for anyone. 

Yet slowing down the aging process isn’t the same as solving the problem of time. 

The problem of time comes down to one thing: your body evolves and erodes simultaneously. Both are constant, invisible forces. The surest way to escape time’s clutches is to keep evolving, and the good news is that sometimes evolution gains the upper hand. Then we feel expansive, optimistic, forward-looking, and eager to discover new things. In that mode, we have all the time in the world. We can forget time and live as if it didn’t exist. At other times entropy becomes dominant. Now we don’t have time to get important things done, and what time there is wears us down. Bored or depressed, we find our lives losing momentum. As our bodies balance evolution and entropy, the two faces of time silently battle for supremacy. The “new old age” proves that erosion can be resisted through beliefs and attitudes. There is no need to buy into any belief that promotes entropy. Awareness can change any energy pattern at will. 

Nobody knows why or how Nature takes sudden creative leaps. Evolution doesn’t telegraph what its next creative leap will be. This is especially true in human beings. Our Stone Age ancestors had no skill at mathematics, and yet, hidden in their cerebral cortex was a staggering capacity for advanced calculations. Ordinary memory, which seems quite limited, can expand at will. With practice, you or I could memorize every word of the Bible, and a precious few individuals are gifted with total photographic memory, being able to recall every moment of their lives. 

There is no indication that memory has any evolutionary limits. It can keep unfolding, without end. The human brain seems set up for that already. [Autobiography: The Women Who Can’t Forget--Price’s onset of total recall was out of her control, but she reminds us of the vastness of human potential]

Entropy is simply Nature’s tendency to disperse energy and become less organized over time. Hot food grows cold if you let it stand; the entire universe grows colder by expanding in all directions, diffusing the original heat generated by the Big Bang. But life stands in opposition to this seemingly inflexible principle: all living things build up energy and become more and more complex. There was no real need for the primordial universe to build DNA, which traps billions of bits of energy along its double helix and gains more energy as we eat and digest food. 

Life represents a cosmic capacity to manipulate both time and energy. As long as you take in more energy than you give off, you are stopping time. Time only runs out when energy runs out. Imagine a log in the fireplace that takes an hour to burn. That hour represents how much energy is available before “heat death” occurs. DNA makes energy available forever--or at two billion years so far, and counting. DNA functions as if it were immortal. Entropy isn’t banished; it still presses on your genes, coaxing them to break down, but life persists anyway and keeps evolving. A cell deprived of food and air for as little as three seconds begins to deteriorate; a brain deprived of oxygen for over 10 minutes begins to die. But these aren’t threats so long as your body knows how to manage time. 

The option of standing still isn’t available. If you sit in a chair and stop using your muscles, they will atrophy; the same holds true if you stop using your brain. The obvious choice is to side with evolution, because then you can grow in new, unexpected areas, giving your body an agenda that time cannot undo.

Mastery over time is built into you. Your body runs on multiple clocks, each set to a different speed. When you were a baby, your skull bones fused at a rate that was incredibly slow compared with the firestorm of new connections that your brain was creating by the millions every minute. Your mother’s immune cells, which were your only protection from disease when you were born, were dying as you developed your own antibodies. Your sexual organs were essentially dormant; your adult teeth were the tiniest of seeds. Dozens of different cycles were being controlled by the DNA that was originally contained in one cell, that first fertilized egg. You didn’t develop fast DNA for your brain and slow DNA for your skull bones. The same genetic code somehow coordinates events lasting from a few thousandths of a second (the firing of a neuron, the absorption of oxygen by a red blood cell) to a few years (losing your baby teeth, developing a full immune system), to entire decades (mature reasoning, grey hair, menopause).

What this amounts to is that your body orchestrates time to your benefit. Once you force upon the body your own fears and negative beliefs about time, the trouble begins. It’s the belief that there is never enough time that creates deadlines, a highly symbolic word with overtones of mortality: if you run out of time before you cross the line, you’re dead. Your body plays its part in this belief. If you find yourself racing to meet a deadline, your heart rate will speed up, your blood vessels will constrict, and your mind will race to keep pace with everything you need to do. These are all disruptions of bodily rhythms and disruptions of your body’s exquisite control of time. What is more damaging is that you are treating time as an adversary. 

Research on stress has found that one of the biggest causes is uncertainty. If you place a mouse on a metal plate and give it harmless electric shocks at regular intervals, the mouse won’t be happy, but it will eventually adjust. If the same harmless shocks are administered at random intervals, the mouse grows exhausted to the point of death in a matter of a few days. Since life is full of unpredictability, adapting to it is a major challenge. 

It’s the incidentals that break your body down at the level where time is being controlled. When you focus anti-aging on the physical level, you bypass the invisible level that is far more important. Whatever breaks down your body’s timing creates aging. The culprit is not time itself. Consider how everyday choices influence your body’s timing. 

Unpredictability: Choosing to keep irregular hours, working the night shift, going to sleep at different times, eating irregularly, drastically changing how much you eat--all these choices are known to throw off the body’s basic metabolic rhythms. The rhythms of the body need to be healthy, because they are the most basic way that you keep your life properly timed--every cell synchronized with every other. The more irregular your lifestyle, the harder it is for this delicate, complex coordination to exist. Correction requires going back to regular hours of work, eating, and sleep. In most cases this is enough to allow the body to reset itself. 

Disorder, confusion: Choosing to procrastinate, doubting, indecision, lack of organization, impulsiveness, slovenliness or careless hygiene, lack of purpose, restlessness, drifting--these factors all create a state of external disorder that the body must cope with. The brain sends confusing signals about what to do, so the cells lack clear direction. The inner and outer are always linked, and bringing order to your outer life has a beneficial influence on your inner life. If you address inner confusion and disorder, you can begin to find ways to put your external affairs in order as well. 

Accidents: Choosing to be inattentive, distracted, undisciplined, unfocused, self-destructive: most result from a failure to pay attention, which is a choice. Your cells are in the habit of never forgetting; they must function precisely, thousands of times per second. If your attention to external things wanders and becomes unfocused, the brain can’t be expected to keep your body in perfect working order, either. 

Trauma, sickness: Choosing unnecessary risks and dangers, gambling with your safety, exposing your body to physical threat and infection, refusing to pay attention to healing: the belief that sickness strikes randomly no longer holds true. You open your body to trauma and disease by ignoring well-known guidelines for healthy living and prevention. At a more subtle level, your immune system takes its cues from the brain, which implies a great deal of control over when you get sick and when you don’t. Once a serious trauma occurs, that part of the body can no longer coordinate its activities with the rest of the body. The loss of one component throws off timing everywhere until healing brings the whole system back into line. 

Violence: Choosing to be out of control, unleashing anger and rage, refusing to understand your hidden hostility, seeking revenge, dwelling on resentment. Any eruption of violence calls for an extreme reaction from your body, firing up every cell to high alert. Adrenaline and other hormones involved in fighting area released; these are catabolic, meaning that they break down tissue in order to release energy. As this breakdown occurs on the physical level, control over time also breaks down--the sudden intrusion of alarm cuts off normal communications. Emergencies are enormously disruptive in external life, and your inner life mirrors that disruption. 

Chaos: Living in the total disorder of war, crime, domestic violence, abandoning all coping mechanisms, going over the edge socially or mentally: at its most extreme, life turns chaotic, and the disasters of outer life are visited on the body. When you can no longer cope, your brain becomes drastically disorganized. The signals sent to the body are then so disordered that the most basic processes of sleep, digestion, metabolism, and healing become seriously compromised. Short bursts of chaos are almost as destructive as living with chaos permanently. In both cases the body runs the risk of becoming so imbalanced that it cannot return to normal functioning on its own. 

You can make choices that prevent erosion. You can retune your body so that it regains its complex mastery over time. By starting with the easiest step, you lay a foundation, and then it becomes more viable to make difficult choices. 

Keep regular hours, eat and sleep on a regular schedule. 

Avoid drastic changes in diet and activity. 

Set up an orderly work environment. Reduce distractions. 

Rest quietly once to twice during the day to let your body retune itself. 

Take yourself out of stressful situations sooner rather than later. 

Take your time; don’t rush. 

Make decisions when they arise. Don’t procrastinate or get distracted. 

Pay attention to what is directly in front of you. Focus on one thing at a time. 

Don’t multitask. Dividing your attention leads to confusion and weakened focus. 

Avoid the temptation to plunge into high-risk situations. 

Stay within your comfort zone. 

Put your house and finances in order. 

Address underlying anxiety.

Release your repressed anger. Learn to do this without losing control of hurting others. 

Renounce violence in thought and word. 

Become more resilient emotionally. 

Eliminate chaotic influences at work and in your primary relationship. 

Live as if you have all the time in the world. 

Your ultimate goal, living as if you have all the time in the world, is a functional immortality. This happens to be how every cell in your body is already living. Immortality comes naturally; giving in to time is what requires effort. Even what looks like a small change can retune the body. That’s why we work up to the most damaging things by starting with the easiest. 

If your body can run on dozens of clocks at the same time, each kept in perfect sync, this raises the question of where the master time-keeper resides. It implies that there is a place that is unaffected by time, like sitting on the solid riverbank to watch the constantly changing motion of a river. This place must be outside time, which means that in some way your body knows what it means to be timeless. Functional immortality was born here, in the awareness that time cannot touch us. 

Because your body is timeless at some level, you should be able to experience that. Experiencing the timeless happens spontaneously to all kinds of people, usually when they least expect it. In the middle of life’s activity, they suddenly step out of ordinary time. 

Imagine the color red. There are no brain cells that turn red when you think of the color, nor do you go to a special place on earth, a color bank, where red is stored. Redness, or any other hue, exists in a mysterious location that seems to be outside ordinary space and time. You can fetch a color instantaneously whenever you want to see it in your mind’s eye, because there was no distance to cover and no time needed to make the journey. The same holds true for how billions of cells manage to be coordinated in your body. There is no master clock ticking away anywhere in your brain. This is because the brain manages hundreds of different rhythms meshed together. The brain tunes in to a place that is on the very edge of the timeless. by being anchored there, where atoms first begin to vibrate, setting the timing of the entire universe, your brain has found the only place from which time can be managed. The rational mind depends on clock time to get through the day, but the timeless is a familiar place to the cells. They function as if they were immortal, simply because they make use of the timeless every second. The challenge for us is to adopt functional immortality as our basic way of life. To do that, we must reawaken the connection between time and the timeless, which is known as the soul. 

Once you can accept that time was never your enemy, then escaping the ravages of time becomes possible. It’s your mind that started the trouble; it’s your body that will get you out of trouble. The mind cuts life up into neat slices--days, weeks, months, years--hoping to hoard as many as possible, but always dreading the end that will inevitably come. By contrast, your body lives in the moment, and each moment merges into another in one continuous flow. 

The breakdown of flow is your real enemy. When flow breaks down, energy is wasted, communication within the body is cut off, gaps appear in the body’s intelligence. These are invisible events, but they are real. Once you learn to restore the flow, your body is fully capable of repairing the damage that has built up. It will naturally return to a state of dynamic balance. At that point the whole aging process comes to an end. 

No one can expect to bring aging to a stop immediately. But you can make a major difference starting now. Your aim is to align your mind with a new way of being. Meditation exposes your brain to a less active state, and through repeated exposure, your brain adapts to that stillness and silence. However, there’s still the problem of everyday life, which pulls us into our old belief that time is running out. 

Quit your internal dialogue. This is a simple way to contact the stillness that is the source of awareness. Sit quietly with your eyes closed. Let your breathing settle; put your attention in the center of your chest. As you inhale, let your consciousness settle on the syllable So, and exhale to the syllable hum. Feel the air coolly entering your body, gently carrying the sound; feel the air coolly leaving your body. Continue for 10 to 20 minutes. This simple meditation releases the mind from its incessant chattering. Three things may distract you: outside noises, sensations in your body, and distracting thoughts. When you notice any of these, just easily return to breathing on that sound. This is an exercise in allowing the mind to find its own natural silence and effortless focus. 

Discharge tension. Awareness is meant to flow easily, without interruption. When awareness becomes stuck, tension is created in the body. Cramps, pain, tightness, and stiffness are the most obvious symptoms of this, but at a deeper level your body is storing the memory of old stress. Yoga or deep energy work are great ways to release these body memories. Yet everyone’s body has a natural mechanism for discharging tension, and you can take advantage of it immediately. Lie down before you go to sleep at night. Assume a position flat on your back without a pillow; spread your arms and legs at your side. Draw in a deep, slow breath, then release it through your mouth in a sigh, as freely and naturally as your body wants. Some sighs may be quick, almost like a gasp; others may be as deep as a sob. You may feel a sense of relief, sadness, grief, elation, or any other emotion. Be aware of the emotions as they arise; you are not just releasing physical tension; you are accessing bodily memories at the same time. The natural discharge of tension bundles thoughts, feelings, and sensations together, so let them all go at once. Do this exercise for no more than 10 minutes, because it can be intense; allow yourself to fall asleep if your body wants to. This is also part of the discharge process. 

When you are in the flow, there is a certain feeling associated with it: light, open, fresh. Being in this feeling gently pushes out negativity and resistance. One way to help this purifying process along is to bring light to the dark places that hide from being seen, where awareness has a hard time reaching. Visualizing inner light is the closest you can come to actually seeing awareness in its pure state; the real thing is invisible, yet when we say that someone is glowing with life, we are referring to the close relationship between life energy and awareness. Sit or lie down, preferably not when you are so tired that you are ready to fall asleep. Turn your gaze inward, which means feel your body from the inside. Visualize a stream of gold-white light cascading down your body. The stream fills you from the crown of your head slowly through your chest, out your arms, then down your abdomen until it divides and flows down both legs. See the gold-white light go out through your feet and enter the ground. Now take the light back up your body, this time using blue light. See the blue light start at your feet and slowly fill your body until it exits through the top of your head--see it form a laser beam going as high as you can see, out into space and beyond. This whole cycle should take about one minute, repeat ten times. A simple variation is to sit quietly and breathe in the light, then slowly breathe it out. You can alternate between blue and gold-white, but finish by filling your entire body with gold light, seeing it suffuse everywhere, extending beyond you as a golden aura. Ask to be enclosed in this light for the rest of the day. 

Sound can also be a powerful tool for moving stuck energy. Physical sensations and emotions are linked to sound. Sadness gives rise to weeping, happiness to laughter. These are the “sound signatures” of an underlying energy, and if you can find the signature, you can connect to the energy. Old, stuck energies are easier to find this way than trying to trace back the time and place where something happened in the past. 

Sit or lie down, preferably in a private place where you can feel comfortable making noise. Take a slow, easy, deep breath and see it reaching down below your diaphragm into the abdomen as deep as it can go. Follow the breathing sensation. As you exhale, make a low tone. You want it to be long and steady--begin by humming a low note that helps, but you want to do this with your mouth open. Let the tone extend for as long as you can, until your breath runs out. See this tone rising from your abdomen and coming out of your mouth. Om is an effective tone, but you want your deep stresses to emerge on the tone. The secret here is to let your body make the tone it wants to make. 

Toning wants practice. You have to do two things at once: make a tone and keep your awareness in your body. Don’t pay undue attention to the tone itself. Let it come naturally. A good example is deep sighing. When you sigh and make a vocal noise at the same time, a grown or moan, the two are combined. You feel how much physical relief the sigh is bringing as you make a natural, unconscious sound. 

With practice you can locate many sound signatures connected to repressed feelings and buried experiences. Your body knows whether it wants to release a moan, groan, wail, scream, squeal, or cry. Instead of erupting all at once, which can feel jarring, you can provide a long tone that provides a more cushioned release. If you experiment, you will soon find which tone fits which energy. There is no limit to toning, once you have learned the knack of letting your body discharge tension by letting the stuck energy ride out smoothly and continuously on a sound. 

[why-is-it-always-autumn]

Love a self-inflicted time loop. The main character isn’t trapped.  They can stop whenever they want.  But how can they when things aren’t perfect yet?  They can do better than this.  They need to try again.  They can get it right this time.  They just need to try again.  They can stop anytime they want.  Just one more time.  They can fix this. They just need to try again.  There are still things to fix.  They just need to try again.

[angstandhappiness]

INTERESTING

Love a self-inflicted time loop. The main character isn’t trapped.  They can stop whenever they want.  But how can they when things aren’t perfect yet?  They can do better than this.  They need to try again.  They can get it right this time.  They just need to try again.  They can stop anytime they want.  Just one more time.  They can fix this. They just need to try again.  There are still things to fix.  They just need to try again.

[likethecastle]

#its about the tunnel vision#its about losing sight of what a win condition even looks like#its about writing off the entire timeline at the slightest inconvenience#its about increasing alienation#its about failing to notice that youre destroying yourself and in some cases making things worse#its about the atrophy of your own problem solving skills#its about treating your friends like unskippable cutscenes#its about gradually forgetting everything outside the loop#its about the fact that you arent even really trapped#its about making the same choice over and over again#its about falling hard into the sunk cost fallacy (via op)

Love a self-inflicted time loop. The main character isn’t trapped.  They can stop whenever they want.  But how can they when things aren’t perfect yet?  They can do better than this.  They need to try again.  They can get it right this time.  They just need to try again.  They can stop anytime they want.  Just one more time.  They can fix this. They just need to try again.  There are still things to fix.  They just need to try again.