#it's weird bc usually when i'm gone its because i'm not writing at all and this time it was because i had to focus specifically on a

[yikesola]

I Love Him

Rating: G

Word Count: 1.2k

Summary: There’s a lot to love about tour, but free time in a city on the opposite end of the world is very high on the list.

A fic about art galleries and love at first sight.

read on ao3

[bitchfitch]

My mother's bf had a fairly major surgery (he's fine and recovering well DW) and he's going to be housebound for his birthday this year, so I've been enlisted to come up with a fancy birthday meal for the special birthday boy that's primarily fruit and veg, sweeter than savory, and is something he's never had before.

Bc I'm making watermelington. It's beef Wellington, but watermelon. bc my mom only found out recently you can use watermelon as a tuna substitute. And I know that you can substitute most higher quality beef cuts with tuna or salmon.... usually. Anyways the idea fascinates her so I'm hoping to use that for bonus points.

Now he's off his ass on pain killers so I can't like. Ask him if he's ever had something before. so to meet my brief I've decided to just. commit a novel hate crime against the British I guess.

Anyways. I'm writing this because I need to walk myself through this process and think it'll be surreal enough to be worth taking y'all along for.

So, Beef Wellington. In its most basic bitch arrangement is a beef tenderloin wrapped in prosciutto/really thin bacon, with a layer of mushroom and onion mush, that has been further wrapped in mustard slathered puff pastry.

We will be ship of Theseusing this. bc beef Wellington is like. the opposite of what he wants. Which is why it's funny.

Puff pastry-> it's still just puff pastry

this one doesn't have to change (aka I can't be fucked to do pastry prep and I'm just gonna use store bought it's Fine.)

the prosciutto is also just going to be prosciutto.

Thin meat

Beef tenderloin-> watermelon,

Tbh this is a pretty 1 to 1 substitution. I'll bake the slices at like. 250-300 for an hour or so ahead of the rest of prep to dry it out a bit. bc you can't like. Sear watermelon to seal in the water like you can beef. By definition it's a very wet fruit (like me when I fall into the lake). Ill Add salt and chili and lime juice while baking maybe. this is the easy part

The mushroom mush-> salsa done bad style

As the word mush implies, this is meant to be a very soft mix. It adds a lot of nuttiness to the wellington that rounds out all of the salt from the meats. I'm replacing it with white person salsa(the birthday boy can't handle spice). Tomato, lime juice, parsley, avocado, cucumber, feta, and maybe mango so I can have an excuse to have a lil mango treat. I said I wasn't making it spicy. I'm still putting a bit of chili in it. bc it'll be better like that. This is also a ridiculously wet bit of mush, Even the original mushrooms have too much water. I'll figure something out.

Mustard -> jelly

He lives in a big city. those preserve sections are massive. I'll find a weird one. maybe apricot.

Prep:

We're in the mind palace kitchen, I have not attempted any of this. We're just thinking real hard about it and I'll edit as needed on the day and post results.

The watermelon

Preheat oven to eh. 300f? We want low and slow to dry things out without it taking a year. but idk what his oven is like. If it's gentle I'll bump it up another ten-twenty.

Slather some watermelon slices in salt chili powder and lime juice mixture.

bake for 30 min on a wire rack or directly on the oven racks (after cleaning thoroughly) if he doesn't have a wire rack. with a drip try underneath to catch the drippage. check frequently. Have one slice that's for being poked to see if it's approaching being meat. Bake longer if needed.

Salsa bad style

chop everything up and add it to a pan with some oil in it. Tbh I don't think the type of oil you use for cooking matters if you're not like, getting near any smoke points. Most people can't tell the difference unless you made your food bland as hell.

Anyways there's some wildly different moisture contents on the list so there has to be an Order to cook off as much water as possible without getting yucky.

Tomatoes and cucumbers go in together with some salt to get the cucs softening, then the mango chunks and lime juice. Once most of the water is gone the avocado feta and parsley can go in. There is a good amount of water in avocados but they're delicate and don't pan fry well, so we're just going to ignore their water crimes and hope for the best. They just need to be evenly mixed through the rest of the mush.

Putting it together

lay out the puff pastry, cut into sections to wrap each watermelon slice individually with.

Slather in jam

Take the prosciutto and lay it out on half of each section of the pastry,

spoon the salsa onto that

Melon

Another layer of salsa

another layer of thin meat

Fold the pastry over the top and pinch the edges bc watermelon slices are not a rollable shape and I don't want to carve a watermelon into a tube for this because that sounds irritating.

Brush with egg wash and more parsley

Cook in oven following the pastry's preferred temp and time. it's fucking watermelon, you're not getting ecoli from it.

watermelington :)

I'm serving it with baked sweet potatoes and spinach based salad with whatever toppings are left over from making the salsa.

anyways thank you for joing me on this thought experiment. I will post updates once the deed is done. I'm sorry to every British person ever.

[super-paper]

This might sound weird. In my viewpoint AFO feels like a child trapped in a grown man's body with his attitude and mindset. A man-child if you will. He's trying to enact childish fantasies onto the world, this obsession may stem from an event he experienced in his youth. He feels like a kid, felt it again when he blamed Kudou this chapter. In a better world AFO would've gone into the age regression community to get his chance to act out his childish impulses in a safe environment to process whatever trauma he endured instead of taking it out on the world.

YEAH I'M LOVING IT BC

Hori typically uses child imagery to like, show characters at their most vulnerable and honest and represent like the "naked essence" of who they really are. AFO rewinding into a literal child plays with those expectations, in a way-- but in this case, AFO "at his most honest/vulnerable" is almost monstrous in its depiction:

Like, AFO's got some pretty heavily implied hang ups about feeling powerless/being powerless and he uses escapism + the constant degradation of others to distance himself as far as he can from those hang ups. I wouldn't be surprised if his backstory ends up depicting some horrible violation of his own autonomy where he was treated as subhuman/toyed with-- and he's now attempting to inflict that same feeling of powerlessness on everyone else. Instead of healing from whatever trauma he experienced, he's become a slave to it. Of course, there's always a chance I'm reading into this too much-- But Hori's been pretty consistent in his depiction of abuse as a cycle (esp. with the Kotaro-Tenko and Endeavor-Touya plots), so tbh, it would strike me as an odd writing choice if he decided "yeah, AFO just woke up one day and decided to Be Like That."

And I've said this before on twitter, but like-- AFO is SUCH an Umineko/"Witch" coded character. It's one of the reasons I find him so fascinating, bc I've always loved the way umineko depicts coping mechanisms in severely traumatized/abused individuals and how it depicts abuse as a vicious cycle:

In Umineko, "a witch" is typically a manifestation that's born from a person's horrible trauma (or from a person's "will" to overcome that trauma and escape from an otherwise inescapable fate). They're born from humans who have been violated in some terrible way and who are desperate to redefine themselves as something powerful-- something that transcends that pain, something that pain can no longer "touch." They reclaim a sense of agency over their trauma/abuse/etc by adopting powerful alter egos who blend fiction and reality-- but ultimately, it's all still a form of escapism.

It's hard not to see the similarities between how umineko defines "witches" and how mha defines "villains"-- especially with characters like AFO, Tomura, and Dabi who have all adopted trauma-based alter egos-slash-identities and who attempt to reclaim "agency" over their trauma in intensely destructive ways.

Like.... so much of heroaca is just "my trauma takes the form of a powerless child because that's how it made me feel, and that's how it still makes me feel even though I'm not a child anymore-- but what if you could see that?" and then AFO won't even allow that much bc he's throwing his whole afoussy into rejecting MHA's usual tactics for humanization and instead going "OH??? YOU LIKE CUTE KIDS???? YOU LIKE CUTE INNOCENT WEEPY KIDS?? I'LL SHOW YA'LL CUTE *rips his entire face open*". We gotta respect his commitment to the bit, I guess, but at the same time jesus fuckin' christ dude.😬

[rosegoldenatlas]

its sleep time!

good news:

today marks exactly 1 year since i came out!

(ALMOST) everybody used my correct name and pronouns the whole day

thats about it

bad news:

my mother deadnamed me and misgendered me the whole day (and was the only person to do so)

afterwards she went on her usual spiel about how "horribly hard it is for her and dificult to use my proper name" and how "its something so difficult that everybody in the family is struggling with immensly!" (no it isnt) (literaly everybody else got it right the whole time) (including my 90 year old grandma with memory loss) (also everybody else found out about my prefered name TODAY and instantly started using it and actualy thanked me for telling them) (my mother is the only one who knew about my name before)

also thanksgiving so i ate too much and am now hating myself for it

ended up going on a slight cutting spree on my shoulder (it was kinda funny because i didnt check how much gauze we had before hand and it turned out we were OUT and i had to scramble to make a makeshift bandage) (dont worry the final result was very hygenic and nothing to worry about, i dont fuck around with first aid) (i dont even know why. i dont care about my life i just NEED to do it right) (although it was unfortunant because i was in such a frenzy when i was cutting myself that all the cuts were really surface level and barely enough to draw blood, and nowhere near as deep as i deserve) (im usualy much better at hurting myself this just passively stings if i had done it right it would be SO MUCH more painful)

anyways that was my day hope yours wasnt too bad?

goin to sleep

hope you have a good night

stay awesome

oooh GOOD NEWS YAY

• Oh wow you're doing better than me! I am genuinely scared to tell my family except my brother and older sister BC they've also got some genderfuckery going on.

• YOOOOO THATS SICK I'm happy 4 u

Bad news is longer.. nooooo.

• what a bitch. Honestly. But hay at least it was just her she's the outlier in this situation.

• write it on your arm in sharpie and wave it aggressively in her face whenever she misgenders u. Or even better if your willing to risk her wrath, misgender her back. Call her a he. Call her their birth name but slightly to the left (so if her name is like Becky call her Bucky). And if she tries to correct you about the name just say that's how you remember learning it and that its hard to change it up after so long. And for the misuse of pronouns just ignore all complaints about them by changing the subject r smthn.

And hey wait why isnt the stuff in parentheses in the good news section!!!??? This is an outrage.

• the point of thanksgiving is to hate yourself afterwards I think. I dunno I don't eat at all really during thanksgiving BC all of the foods are things I really don't like- some to the point of throwing it up later. And we have thanksgiving leftovers for a few nights afterwards so I just have to sneak snacks or I don't eat (we can only eat leftovers until all the thanksgiving food is gone or else its a waste)

• fuckkk girliepop, Red, rule 2 of cutting is always having the stuff to clean up near you o you're gonna do it. (Rule 1 is getting a support system and talking to ppl u trust about it, which you're doing wonderfully.) At least the cuts were shallow and you may think 'but Atlas! That's bad. Now they don't hurt as much' and I say good if they get too deep you might get nerve damage and then it won't hurt at all and it would make everything worse trust me. 'But Atlas! I deserve pain and semi to fully permanent nerve damage!! I'm a bad person! :((' and to that I say where is your proof? Where is the proof of these alleged bad things because right now I haven't seen any and you are not the judge in this court of law you are both the prosecuted and the defendant. Both of whom have shown no evidence to the jury.

Wow that was a weird analogy but it works

My day yesterday was.. Ehh.

GOOD STUFF

• was able to sneak off before the political argument happened

• a YouTuber I like posted a video after a year of silence

• I wrote three paragraphs of fanfiction!!

• was able to sneak some soda my cousin brought when my mom wasnt looking (im not allowed soda)

BAD STUFF

• Didn't eat a lot cause of stuff already said

• had to misgender my bother and sister in front of family (all of us are out to everyone but the family)

• was having a masc day and got misgendered all day but eh comes with being gender fluid ig lol.

• nearly threw up the food I did eat bc its food I have a hard time eating, not a pleasant sensation I'll tell you.

• had to deep clean the entire house twice (abt 6 hrs of work total, once before everyone arrived (4hrs) and once after (2hrs) I can be lazier after BC my mom is drunk

• mom was being a clingy drunk and hugged me and I want to rip off my skin and clean the meat under it with bleach and vinegar before getting new skin.

That's all!!! It was pretty much a normal day in terms of bad stuff except the eating thing which is only sometimes but now its a lot more intense. In terms of good day it was more than usual!!! Yes!!!

Hope you slept well.

Love you Queen!

[strwbrryfire]

hehe was tagged by the lovely @wisteriagoesvroom thank u dearrr <33

How many works do you have on AO3?

Only 16 total, surprisingly

What's your total AO3 word count?

70k. a lot of what i write is under 4k words lol

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

they're all genshin fics so i am nottt listing those lmao

(& one of them is dead poets society fic i never finished whoops)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try to! it normally takes me a bit to muster up the courage to respond tho lol but usually yes, as comments are really the only thing that keep me motivated to write

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

again its a genshin fic and i will not be linking it bc it is very cringe . i havent deleted it or anything but im not proud of it so as far as i know its gone . but yeah i killed off childe bc hes my lil punching bag

Do you write crossovers?

no but ive really thought about doing some sort of weird dsmp/f1 thing to connect the ugliest of my brainworms. mostly because c!wilbur & c!tommy's relationship really reminds me of how i perceive lando and max, at least in terms of their friendship.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

yep, back when i wrote stranger things stuff, but all the things i wrote for that fandom have been deleted off my page lolol

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes ..,.and the most basic shit youve ever seen in your life

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yes? it was a stranger things one i think

Have you ever had a fic translated?

yep! yet another ST one. think it was byler iirc

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no but i would love to!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

very basic, i know, but destiel and also thanzag from hades.

but from f1 specifically, it will always be landoscar . there is So Much potential in those herbs and i love them dearly

What's a WIP that you want to finish but you don't think you ever will?

the rest of profezia del destino, mostly bc lestappen doesnt move me as much anymore. i might make it into maxiel somehow but we shall see

What are your writing strengths?

fuck if i know lmao. i've been told i'm good at imagery.

What are your writing weakness?

mainly, and annoyingly, dialogue. i try too hard to be waxing poetic but i never know how to translate that into dialogue. and also long plots/anything thats multi chaptered. my train of thought just goes somewhere else completely lol

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i love to do it but i am not good at it, as im One Of Those People who just uses google translate. im definitely trying to improve on that though

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

if i recall correctly, im pretty sure it was 5 seconds of summer. but it could have also been the hunger games. that was a decade ago so i dont super remember lol

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

god. i want to write brocedes so bad. and also norstappen bc the vibes are just so rancid and i love it

and also dsmp

What's your favorite fic you've written?

i suppose through sharpened teeth. but in terms of poem fics, ferrari's satisfaction survey is also a fave of mine .

im too shy to tag anyone so if u see this u have been royally tagged!! thank u again wiz <33

[vacantgodling]

I'm sorry but did I miss something ?? Noble ?? Hello 👀👀

OOOO NOBLE MY BELOVED

so i've actually had noble as a story for a LONG time. a long long time. however i've been extremely intimidated to write it and plan it out because scifi isn't really my... forte? i feel like it should be easy to make a scifi or a space opera but my brain just gets caught up in all the details and i never end up moving forward with them HAHA. but i'm trying to get out of that because writing is supposed to be FUN.

anyway tho, onto noble. just gonna stick this under a cut bc its LONG to ramble and spoilers or whatever bc i never have an excuse to talk about this story and ahhhh i love my son

firstly its called noble because (1) its a story about fuck the government and doing whats right and (2) its a play on noh's name, which is literally pronounced 'noble' (for the most part) when you put it all together.

in this universe earth has kind of been fucked; no one is really born on earth anymore bc the planet has gone to shit and the radiation is so bad and people who still live on the planet are usually sent there as prisoners (so earth is space australia but literally) or they're unlucky enough to be born there. noh was born on earth (though he doesn't remember this) however, he was taken in by the overarching... uh idk space police state government thing. i haven't thought about what it is too much lmao. anyway, babies are usually taken from earth if they have a good aptitude (aka they survived lmao) and since they're abandoned anyway they're indited into our FAVORITE super soldier program.

this program is called JACK and JILL.

the jack and jill program is an elite super soldier police force program where jacks are the brains and jills are the brawn. they go around enforcing laws, doing drug busts, keeping the "peace" around the galaxy etc etc. however, they always go in pairs just like the nursery rhyme jack and jill, and most jacks and jills are trained together from infancy to make sure that they're 100% in sync.

again, this is all shit noh doesn't remember, but he used to be a JILL. his JACK was a woman named amelia rottney. however something happened and he, amelia and some of their other companions (two other jack & jill units comprised of ethan summers (the jack) and iodine mary evelyn (the jill) and neso/neon (so technically speaking and i have to do more research into this to make sure that i am portraying this correctly but neso/neon are a DID system, but bc both the alter (neon) and the host (neso) operate together p well for the most part, they're the only "solo bodied" jack/jill unit. also speaking of representation, noh is mute! he mainly communicates with sign language but he does have implants; which got fucked up when he was first initially found but he eventually gets new ones but this is off topic).

but they all discovered some fucked up shit about the government and wanted to bring it to light obvs (i mean the fact that none of them knew that they were all p much stolen orphans is Bad Probably) however the government got to them first and sought to eliminate them. they all scattered p much, but noh p much sacrificed himself to let the others escape so they tortured him and erased his memory and then left him adrift in space to die. however in like a weird ass ploy to keep power they basically painted noh & co as terrorists that were trying to disrupt the peace of the cosmos, so they offered a reward/bounty for noh & co dead or alive-even though they knew they set him adrift and for all intents and purposes the government isn't looking for him he's dead.

until he's yknow. not dead. since yknow. he was found by a cargo vessel adrift and was able to be saved. tm.

so the whole story is kind of noh being on the run/trying to stay on the DL while he tries to figure out what in the sam hell is going on and then eventually reuniting with his friends and fucking this government up the ass in a bad way.

he also ends up befriending and eventually getting into a relationship with a space pirate rouge thing (i have so much worldbuilding to do its not even funny lmaooooo) named emerion jackson and idk i love their relationship a lot i rotate them in my head LMAO.

but yeah so that's the Extended Cut of what noble is about, maybe i will make this into a coherent wip intro one day LMAOOOO

[squirmydonnie]

Vent: CW: unreality

I'm just very upset lately. Very angry.

I don't want to do any of the things that I've done for my whole life.

And I guess that's because I've done them for my whole life but it feels weird.

Nothing feels the way that it did. Everything is wrong and weird.

Nothing feels the same or different.

Everyone I know I don't know anymore.

Everything I do isn't the same anymore.

Most things I do make me upset.

Not really that they've become unenjoyable.

Because the things that I'm talking about aren't enjoyable things. They are things that usually bother me or make me sad. But now it makes me sad and then angry.

I'm more upset most of the time.

Not enjoying things.

I'm just mostly upset all the time.

I've been shaking this whole time writing this. Not out of anger.

I just have so much anxiety.

Nothing feels right at all. I'm just waiting for it to be over.

But I've been waiting for so long.

That most things just feel like me waiting. Waiting for it to be over.

I know how long I have. But it's become pretty tiresome.

I'd really like for time to just speed up.

It doesn't help that this is the boring and uninteresting I've ever felt.

My friends and family are gone.

I don't have them. So I miss them. But do I really?

What I'm really missing is everything they gave me.

But if that was all just me, I've just been alone this whole time.

I don't have my friends or family.

I don't even have myself anymore.

before coming into "real contact" with my daydreams, I only ever talked with Cookie 12.

We could short conversations with each other.

He didn't really know who or what I exactly was. It sometimes seemed like he didn't really know where he was.

We were like on a white piece of paper. White screen. White walls.

I enjoyed talking with another version of me. And of course I did.

I've always done this. Making stories about myself and changing my name in them even though it was clearly me.

I like putting myself into stories. I like thinking of myself in a very vague way.

But once I'm unable to do that, I don't know "what I are".

I don't know what I'm doing. Its extremely lost. Theres nothing I can do.

Theres nothing I can look up and find for this.

I find this problem often. So much that i don't like it when something is like me. Or if it relates to me. And don't like clones.

Or people who I sometimes see as my clones due to my similarity to me.

I've since had less problem with this. But. I really do like clones. When I can tell its me.

I like Cookie 12 and BC.

I miss having BC.

Earlier this week I wanted BC to brush me.

I don't know how to explain this, but I was in class and something was wrong with my back.

So I wanted her to brush it with a brush?. But she can't because shes gone.

So it was just me in the white room being brushed by nothing. Like the brush is floating and brushing me but no one is there but me.

Cookie 12 isn't gone, but I know he doesn't want to talk to me. Xe used to be okay with it. But now that he knows I'm the one who's been doing all this stuff to him. He obviously doesn't want to be around me.

I used to take Mama from him and just have her in my room.

If I didn't take things so seriously and at face value I wouldn't have this kind of problem.

And I'm specifically talking about things that can be considered imaginary or fake.

These kind of things I take as real.

And when it's not that. Its serious subject that everyone else takes as a joke.

And this seriously effects me. Its hurts me so much I can't move on from it.

I'm hurt by these things and I can't handle it.

I hate so many jokes and I find nothing funny a lot of the time, despite how humorous I am.

It's all just very confusing.

It's the first time I've been human I guess.

Everything's is just wrong now.

[icyowl]

Hello again! It’s me: the anon who asked that question about “Quiet Eyes”. I’ve been visiting your blog a lot lately (I hope that doesn’t sound weird lol 😓) bc I really like the posts you reboot or write that have writing tips/prompts. Writing is one of this things that I both hate and love 😩 but going through your blog tends to reignite my passion for it! Anyways, I wanted to ask: what got you into writing and if I could be 🌺 Hibiscus anon?

A NEW ANON?!?!?! AHTODFNVWRGLHN SSQQQUUUEEEEEEE!!!

I'm so happy you like the prompts! I always worry when I post or reblog stuff not related to fanfic because I feel like I should have sideblogs with dedicated themes like most people do rather than post fanfic/prompts/art/photography all in one chaotic place. Then again I share stuff mostly so I can go back through my own blog at a later date and it's all in one place, so, whatever I guess haha.

I'm so happy I ignite your passion! I gotta say, if you don't have a love/hate relationship with writing, you're not a writer. Like I hate how slow I write and that my ideas are usually just the same tropes with different characters and my WIPs constantly plague me and I don't know how clear my writing comes across to others and and and. . .

But I love how I can make anything I want by writing and I love how it can make people feel and I love how much work I put into making my writing better and so on, so yeah, I love and hate writing too!

Info-dumping below the cut haha

I got into writing when I was about 10 because I've always had a really active imagination and my dreams have always been very imaginative so I started by writing them down so I wouldn't forget them because some of them were pretty neat. Then I was like "I gotta add this to it, and this, and that" and that became my first word doc. Then I got really into the warrior cats series and created a storyline with my own characters, which I think had like 20-30 original characters and got to about 60 pages single-spaced on word, so that was my first fanfic!

Then writing became an outlet for the shows I got really into. I think bleach was one of the first?? One look at Renji and I was gone haha! I'd get little crushes on the characters and couldn't talk to anybody about it because my family and everyone at school made fun of me for watching anime, so I wrote to get it out of my system in a private way, and now I've evolved into having tropes I like and having (countless) WIPS and I've made a blog I'm proud of! I even recently discovered I kinda like a bit of whump, which has become its own journey since a lot of people think its weird and gross (I'm not even that bad, I only like cute whumpee-caretaker stuff, so).

Early on I came up with the philosophy that writing was like a superpower. If I write well enough, I can make people imagine and feel anything I want. I can make people fly and fall in love and never age and go to war and find peace. It's still pretty much just a creative outlet and a way I can put myself into the stories and with the characters I like so much, but I share my stuff in case anyone else would like to read them too.

Don't get discouraged. Write for yourself, not for others. Write what you want and when you want simply because you want to. When you don't want to write, then don't. That's why I don't really do requests and only post a new fic once in a while. It also means that I still write even when I don't get the number of likes or comments or reblogs I would like or anticipated. How much or how little interaction my blog or fics get isn't why I write, so it doesn't affect me that much. Sure I'd like to have 1000 followers and get asks like this every day, but I'm happy with what I've got. I hope you can be, too!

P.S. Just know that I'm saving this ask to remind myself that I have a positive influence on people for when I don't feel very motivated, so thank you for this

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #109

(taken january 31st, uploading surveys taken while gone... we're at least over halfway done? haha)

Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? No, that sounds absolutely excruciating, especially when your hair is as thick and long as mine is. Waxing my lip and eyebrows back in the day hurt enough.

Have you ever read anything by Edgar Allen Poe? Yeah, The Raven and The Tell-tale Heart off the top of my head.

Do you know anyone named Hunter? I do; he was my neighbor when I lived in the woods (I think where I've lived most of my life so far), and we used to play together as kids a lot. I'm quite a bit older than him, but he was still fun to hang out with, especially when it came to catching bugs and stuff and playing video games. He's all grown up now with his own girlfriend. :')

What was the reason for the last time you restarted your computer? Oh I was SO annoyed, Roman walked on my keyboard and did something where the computer totally, completely froze, and I was deep into an RP post so I was furious. Had to restart it incorrectly, but THANK GOD the drafts function on the site saved my post, lol.

Can you say anything in Korean? If so, please do: Nah, I can't.

Do you like horses? I absolutely love horses and I am VERY much looking forward to photographing horses soon thanks to a friend. <3

What are your grandfathers’ names? William/Bill and... WOW I'm awful, I don't remember Dad's dad's name. :/

Were you forced to read The Odyssey in high school? Yes; maybe not all of it, but I at LEAST remember reading some. We also watched the movie.

Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Yeah, both in the wild and as pets. I currently have one and love her to death.

Are you against seances? I don't care. I DO believe in treating the dead with respect though, if you're gonna do that; we don't have the slightest idea what really happens after death and I definitely do believe in angry spirits and their ability to loosely interact with our reality, so I wouldn't tempt shit, just to be safe.

Do you own any superhero shirts? No. I only have a couple Harley Quinn ones.

Game you were best at in P.E./gym? I absolutely hated P.E., so nothing.

Favorite crystal? Dragon's breath opal.

What did you learn from your first job? I am an absolutely horrible salesperson.

Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz.

Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Cranberry flavored drinks are so awful I literally cannot drink them. I also don't like really fishy foods.

Least favorite pattern? Uh... I'm not sure. I'm not big on like, animal print as a fashion thing I guess. I love cool patterns ON the animals, of course, but not elsewhere.

Favorite weird flavor combo? I absolutely love waffles that also have a layer of peanut butter on them, like I prefer it over only syrup.

Favorite potato food? French fries.

Earth tones or jewel tones? Oh, come on, that's hard! It really depends.

Do you call them fireflies or lightning bugs? I've used both, but I think I only ever said "lightning bug" as a kid.

Writing or drawing? I get more joy out of creating a drawing I'm proud of, but I'm much more likely to write.

Lamps, overhead lights, fairy lights, or sunlight? FAIRY LIGHTS!!!! For Christmas I got this "tree" that you can wind across your wall(s) that have little tiny light bulbs as its "foliage" and I cannot wait til we can move my bed and set it up because that shit is ALWAYS gonna be on.

Nicknames? "Britt" is the most common one that everyone uses. Online though, "Ozz(y)" is frequented bc of the username I usually use. In WoW, everyone in my main's guild know me as "Alessa" because my main character is Alessand(a)ra. Oh, and my childhood nickname from Mom is "Twinkie" lmfao, she gave all her children sweets nicknames. She still uses it sometimes. Girt's pointed out he wants to have the "perfect" nickname click for me one day, which I think is absolutely adorable, but he can't pick one.

How many phone numbers do you have memorized? I have only JUST memorized my mother's phone number, and that's it. It took months upon months of regularly giving it to doctors and stuff to learn and as terribly sad as this is, I'm literally PROUD of myself for finally internalizing a phone number.

Do you prefer heroes or villains? Villains, duh.

What political cause are you most passionate about? Proooobably LGBTQ+ rights. I just find it so, so remarkably hard to fathom how people are against people consensually being in love.

Have you ever considered having children? I've never considered it for like, that current moment, but I go back and forth about the future.

Have you ever considered acting? Nope.

Who was the last person you slept next to? Girt.

Do you think you can be in love and still cheat on your S.O.? No, I don't.

What is the most embarrassing thing anyone has on video of you? Oh who even knows.

Did you ever get lost as a child? Yeah, in a Food Lion I think? Maybe Wal-Mart? An old lady helped me find my mom.

What was the last dream you had? I had a newborn baby is all I can remember. I forgot it until I read this question.

What is the best television show you’ve ever watched? Extraordinary Attorney Woo had the most touching story to me.

What do you believe is your weirdest habit? I take my breakfast biscuits apart to eat each thing individually.

What color are your parents’ eyes? They both have brown eyes.

Have you ever had a surgery before? Yeah, tubes put in my ears and a pilonidal cyst removed. I'm also being put to sleep to get my wisdom teeth taken out; there's simply no fucking way I can stay calm through it with my newfound fear of the dentist. I very barely stayed calm during my last filling.

Would you rather visit the Taj Mahal or the Eiffel Tower? Taj Mahal.

Was your mom over 30 when she had you? Yes.

Who is your 4th phone contact and how do you know them? Dad, and well... he's my dad.

Have you ever lived in a dorm? No.

Do you live in an apartment? No.

What’s the story behind your most noticeable scar? I passed out in the bathroom directly onto my chin.

Have you ever SERIOUSLY considered any kind of plastic surgery? I am very serious about getting loose skin removal on at LEAST my stomach if/when I lose all the weight I want to, and a breast lift also because of the effects of extreme weight loss.

What was the last thing you cleaned and why? My desk, because it was quite the mess.

Does blood make you queasy? No.

What physical features can you just not stand about yourself? My weight in literally every part of my body. How dark and thick and obvious my leg hair is. Cellulite and stretch marks. How insanely dry my skin is everywhere. I have absolutely zero ass. Because of my weight I developed sagging breasts. I could go on and on and on still but I'd really prefer to stop upsetting myself.

What is your favorite crayon color? I like hot pink ones.

Have you ever snorted cocaine? No and I absolutely never will.

Where is the scariest place you’ve ever been? In a bus-like... truck thing that carried me and other mental hospital inmates (some that were VERY unstable and aggressive) in full-body restraints to the local courthouse to argue about our expected stay lengths. If I hadn't argued, I would have been in this specific hospital for months. That whole experience, getting there and talking to the judge, was one of the scariest things I've ever done.

Do you like string cheese? No.

What state/province/country is to the west of your own? Tennessee.

Were you breastfed as a baby? Yes.

What is the cutest baby animal in general? Maybe I'm biased, but meerkats; they're cute when they're born, but pups become absolutely precious once their fur grows out and they open their eyes. I also really love kittens.

Do you find it difficult to tell others what you want for Christmas? Unless you're my mother, yes. Well, I'm even kinda uncomfortable telling Mom, but she's very insistent on us kids telling her straight-up what we want.

Do you enjoy literature from the past or more recent times? I'm perfectly capable of liking both; I don't have a preference. A good, strong story is a good, strong story.

Do you know anyone who plays World of Warcraft? Do you play? *raises hand* Girt also used to play, but it's not his thing anymore. My former roommate Jacob played, too, but he doesn't now (I know because we're friends on there and you see when they log on). I'm absolutely positive I have other gamer friends who have in the past too, just from like, contextual Facebook posts and stuff.

Have you ever been called a nerd? Yeah, but just playfully and not at all with degrading intent.

What is something that you do not like that everyone else seems to love? Manicures and pedicures come to mind. They make me uncomfortable. Oh, and the beach.

Do you enjoy poetry? I really do. I'd love to start writing it again... I even have poem concepts saved in my phone notes, I just haven't written them. I'm always so afraid of it not coming out how I want.

Have you ever written a poem? Oh, loads since middle school.

Do you own any fingerless gloves? Haha I sure do, all the way back from high school... They're still in my top drawer. I barely ever wear them anymore, though; they don't fit as well but also when I tried a few on the last time, I thought I looked pretty childish. I don't at all think fingerless gloves in general are, I think they're hot as fuck, but these ones just didn't look right on me anymore.

Last time you went out to eat, where did you go? We most recently went to McDonald's a good few days ago.

Tell me about the last animal you touched. My cat, Roman. <3 He's my literal shadow - he goes where I go almost without fail, unless he really feels like napping in bed. He's a COMPLETE cuddlebug that very, very obviously adores me/his mama and he's everything to me, too. ;_; <3 He is SUPER shy around strangers, like he will run and hide under our bed the moment he thinks he hears someone at the door, and it takes seeing you MANY many times before he's cool with you; like it took Girt months to earn his trust, and he comes over regularly. He is such, such a loving cat though once he's into you. Oh, and also very bossy, lol. He has such a personality.

Have you ever witnessed a birth? I've only seen cats give birth from my childhood; I absolutely fucking refuse to witness a human birth, I will not make it through it still conscious, and I also DO NOT understand the "oh but it's beautiful!" argument, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck no it isn't. I don't even like seeing videos of animals doing it, but it is slightly more bearable.

Have you ever known something that no one knew you knew? Uh, maybe?

Your thoughts on bacon? I like it, so long it's not mega crunchy or burnt.

Out of the 7 deadly sins, which are you most guilty of? Sloth.

Ever held a newborn animal? Kittens, yes.

Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Yes; Roman's is a light blue, and Cookie's is... wow, I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure pink.

Why do girls go tanning when it just makes them look orange? Because girls can do whatever the fuck they want with their own bodies.

What is the last thing you searched for online? "What is a revenant" haha, I've heard it plenty in fantasy material but I never really learned what it was.

Do sluts make you mad? lol no???????? If a person engages in a lot of completely consensual - and safe - sex and isn't keeping it a secret from a partner or something, that's whatever. If the person is open about it and takes care of their safety, that's their goddamn business that they shouldn't feel shitty about. Get mad over something that actually matters.

If you could live for a year with any foreign family, where would you go? Germany. If I hadn't had a boyfriend I refused to leave, I would've loved to do that in high school.

Think of a friend you know; how would you feel if they kissed you? I wouldn't be okay with anyone who is just a friend kissing me because I'm in a monogamous relationship. I would also probably stop that friendship because I expect my friends to respect my relationship. I don't think a kiss on like, the forehead or something from a close friend comforting me or something like that would upset me, but on the lips would.

Do you have bills to pay yet? No. Something Colleen once said that haunts me to this day is the claim that I'm never going to know what it's like to get my first paycheck and pay my own bills.

Will you be changing your hair any time soon? I desperately need a trim, so I hope I can at LEAST do that soon... but I can't afford to put money aside to dye it when I'm saving for my tattoo, no matter how badly I want it dyed.

Does your mom have a celebrity look-alike? I don't think so. There is, however, a deceased celebrity who had her exact first and last name, and people her age would sometimes point out how cool it was.

Why don’t girls like porn? ... Many... do...? I personally don't just because I have no interest in seeing two random people have sex, but that's just me.

Do you think it’s pretty when 100s of balloons are let loose into the sky? I don't even think about whether it's pretty or not, because I find it extremely, extremely upsetting. Those balloons end up as litter, and many animals even get wrapped up in the strings. If I'm not mistaken, in the ocean, some sea life mistake the deflated balloons as jellyfish and even ingest them. Don't fucking do this shit.

[straighttohellbuddy]

pretty best friends {Dream}

Anon asked: hello!! i saw that requests are open (i think? if not ignore this!!) and i was wondering if u could write a cc!dream x reader where the reader is maybe a faceless streamer as well, or dream just hasn’t seen her face yet for another reason and the first time he does he like… gets all quiet or something and reader thinks it’s bc he thinks theyre ugly and then dream is like “no it’s not that! never that.” djsjsjfroeod i love ur writing tysm!! 😽😽

Summary: Sometimes it's hard to explain what popular, faceless streamers go through to anyone else, so when you find someone whose good, if chaotic, vibes match up with yours, you'll hold onto that friendship tight so long as they feel like the right person to be around. So you're delighted to find that you and Dream operate on the same wavelength. What started as an MCC team up turns into an unshakable bond that you're both hell bent on making everyone else's problem.

Need to Know: They/Them. Popular Faceless Streamer!Reader. Suggestive discussions about CGI characters.

A/N: 3472 words. is this any good? Someone let me know. Can be read as platonic ! 💖 Seriously it's 5am and I'm catching a train in 10 minutes I've been up all night writing is this good???

"Am I nervous about being on Dream's team?" In the few hours before Minecraft Championship began, your nerves had gotten the better of you, so instead of psyching yourself out, you'd gone live early on the training map, "now; no. A few days ago? God, absolutely," you admitted with a warm laugh, "but considering I was acting weird the first time I got to talk to him, and now he's still messaging me to chat, and not just about MCC things, I figure it's on him."

Despite your lack of a camera, your chat could clearly hear how wide you were smiling, already sounding fond despite the relative youth of the friendship you were discussing.

"I was running on not a lot of sleep, and like, I wanna say professional fear," you huffed with faint amusement, "because, like I wasn't starstruck because oh my god its Dream, but more like, I haven't had enough sleep and I'm talking to a man with more followers than there are people living in Australia, you know?"

[Dream: bold of you to assume I am ever well rested either 😂] flashed up in your chat for a moment for everyone to see, and though they couldn't see the surprise on your face, the silence is deafening.

"Shut up, he's here, everyone be cool," you began babbling, "Dream I swear I'm not usually this shit at To Get To The Other Side, I promise," you laughed awkwardly, right before you eat shit on the training map. Then, after a moment, you switch tactics; "also, hey Dream, call me and tell everyone that I'm not lying and we are becoming friends."

It takes a few long moments as you loiter on the training map, looking through comments, many of which were doubtful, before everyone hears the Discord call noise.

"Mods ban everyone who doubted me," you announce triumphantly before you even say hello, and everyone hears Dream's laughter echo across your stream.

"Hello to you too," he chuckles.

"Hi bestie," you play up your closeness, but still he plays along.

"Hey new bestie."

A long moment of silence follows, which you eventually break with a sigh.

"I'm sorry, you didn't need to actually call, I was just being a menace," you admitted sheepishly, starting a new game.

"What are friends for?" Dream responded with easily, and you immediately hit menu and left the server.

"Dude!" You crowed.

"Dude, what?"

"Dude, I was being a menace, you're so nice!" You sound a little muffled, as if covering your face with your hands. Again, Dream laughs, again, it's a kinder sound than you feel like you deserve considering the context.

"We were doing Smash or Pass with the CGI creatures in Spy Kids 2, which I suggested," Dream points out, putting you both on blast in an instant, "and not only were you cool with that, but we both want to smash the Spider-Monkey, so now we're friends. I don't make the rules."

"It's the objectively correct answer," you don't even hesitate before answering, mouth moving faster than your brain, and face still presumably in your hands, "look at that creature and tell me he doesn't; one, sling phenomenal dick, and two, both know and practice aftercare." As you're speaking, if only to provide context for your audience, you tab away from Minecraft to Google image search the Spy Kids 2 Spider-Monkey.

"Yeah, I read your messages, I agree on all fronts; the Spider-Monkey is a service top and would treat us right," Dream added sagely, "but what I'm saying is the fact that we had in depth discussions about our reasoning behind whether we would smash or pass these CGI creatures has forged a friendship that I refuse to back out of."

"That's why you agreed to be my friend?" Your tone was strangely fond at that revelation.

"No, I agreed to be your friend because I posted a Thumb-Thumb from the first movie in our team's chat and you answered 'smash' in all capitals three seconds after I posted it, followed by 'what that thumb do', again, all capitals -"

"I hadn't had a lot of sleep!" You cut in to defend yourself, still sounding vaguely embarrassed.

"I was impressed by your fucking conviction!" He shouts, but the bright affection in his voice keeps him from sounding too aggressive. A few seconds of silence followed, and you tabbed back to Minecraft.

"To those in chat wondering," Dream sounds more than a little amused as he broke the silence, "I hadn't asked Smash or Pass, I literally just posted a picture of the Thumb-Thumb in the group chat; they responded before I had a chance to follow up."

"I don't know what I was thinking," you mumbled, sounding all kinds of bashful.

"I want to study you," you could hear him smirking. It was easy to play up your embarrassment when your chat couldn't see you grinning, "for the record you were really quiet when we first all met in the VC, so it surprised me - in a good way, of course."

"A good way?" You asked dubiously.

"Hey, if it wasn't, I wouldn't have DMed you to follow up, I wouldn't have bothered to watch your stream to try and get to know you better, and I wouldn't have called when you asked," he points out with a strangely kind bluntness to his words. You're once again quietly, ruminating on his words as a warmth blooms in your chest.

"Okay now I am kind of starstruck," you mumble, flustered and fond, "you need me to fight someone for you I definitely will," which gets him to laugh, and begins your long, public history of being a Dream Stan on main.

After your group places 4th in MCC, you anticipate your fast-formed friendship with Dream to fade considerably. You tell yourself you don't mind, that that's what happens; you're friends now, sure, but you shouldn't expect to be especially close.

But he's still just as quick to answer you. He starts conversations. He calls you just because he's had a strange thought he wants to talk through with someone, and you're one of his first choices, so of course you start calling him in similar situations. It doesn't take long for a script to form, even if it's just between the two of you, neither live, even sometimes bleeding into your DMs; Bestie, I've had a thought. / Terrifying, continue.

While you don't interact live often anymore, you speak in private almost daily, and neither of you forgets the joke even when the other isn't around to hear it. Jokes about stanning turn to jokes about simping, made all the more amusing by neither of you knowing what the other even looks like.

While you begin to develop a solid friendship with George and Sapnap along the way, so too does Dream get to know your own housemate, an ASMR YouTuber who is kind but bemused by your burgeoning friendship with one of the biggest names on the platform. Still, she gets along well just as you do with the rest of the Dream Team.

And when your housemate moves out and you're by yourself in the little two-bedroom apartment, they make sure you never feel lonely.

While live interactions were limited, you never hesitated to defend one another, no matter the platform. Mods in your streams quickly learned that if vitriolic Dream-Antis weren't banned before they properly got your attention, you would put them on blast without a shred of mercy.

[the bit is dead. you and dream don't give a shit about each other we know this is for clout. let it go] pops up as a donation that slipped through the cracks, and you, who had been ranking notable Cyberpunk NPCs on a tier list, and had mentioned in an offhand way that you and Dream got into an argument about some of the A-Tier choices, go dead silent.

The mood drops.

"Can you please explain how?" Voice absolutely poisonous and calm, you let your mouse rest idle in the middle of the screen, "mods let them speak; can you bring up this proof that everyone knows about that insinuates that my friendship with Dream is a spiteful bit on my behalf?" And you wait.

[everyone knows. obviously. you guys aren't friends you don't ever talk]

"Obviously," you give a thin-lipped smile that no-one sees as you read a message from Dream himself, asking if you want him to call. You hit call and continue to address the troll, "not that I have anything to prove to you, or anyone," you drawled, feeling rather smug seeing that Dream had picked up, "hey bestie, sorry to interrupt your hot boy shit, but get a load of this clown," you snorted.

"You want me to ban them?" Dream asks with the kind of lazy, smug confidence that was rarely warranted in your shared discussions, but made a pleasant little shiver run down your spine every time you heard it. Chat was screaming.

"That's right, you have mod privileges on my streams, don't you?" Your tone is frankly catty, so full of smug confidence that even without a visual your audience is practically able to picture your smile.

"Yeah, you gave them to me months before we even talked about you joining the SMP -" Dream's own tone shifts as he stops matching your energy to menace you on your own stream. As anticipated, it broke you into disbelieving laughter as you shrieked for a moment.

"You're such a dick!" You laughed brightly, "I've been building up that will-they-wont-they-invite-me bit since MCC!"

"Okay, bye bestie, love you!" Dream announced cheerfully over the top of your dismay before immediately hanging up the call. While you're half-groaning, half-laughing at his sheer audacity, one of your other mods was quick to post that this is how people knew you were actually good friends, and for once your chat was in absolute agreement. At least when they weren't begging you for details on your SMP character and when you might finally join.

"I never said I accepted the invite," you tried to play coy, but it was futile, "he's so lucky he's cute."

Thankfully the overall reception to Dream's brief cameo was positive, and at least for a few days the people claiming you were a clout chaser quietened down. It's a brief reprieve but you're still glad for it.

In some ways you found it easier being faceless online; it's easier to disconnect yourself from a lot of the baseless hate. That being said, you found yourself, like many of your faceless fellow creators, to be a lightning rod for speculation and cruel potential comparisons. And more than anything, people went to horrifying lengths to try and discover your true identity behind the screen.

"Would you ever do a proper face reveal?" You hear yourself asking Dream at an hour that's arguably both too late and too early.

"I mean I want to," he admits, "I want to meet my friends and fans and make IRL content, you know?" Serious conversations were happening more and more often between you two. Maybe it's a sign of closeness, "but still the idea kind of freaks me out, like I'm losing a safety net. I love Sap and George but now that they're out there it's like they've kind of forgotten what it's like, and now my numbers are fucking astronomical, it's..." The way he signs betrays just how exhausted he was by certain aspects of his success.

"I know..." While your numbers may not be even close to Dream's, you've still got a few million subscribers of your own, and know all too well how the pressure aches. Still, you try to lighten the mood, "I'll make you my lock screen."

"What, now?" He laughs with confusion

"After your face reveal I'll make you my lock screen," you tell him with complete sincerity. You're not completely sure what reaction you're hoping for, but silence isn't it.

"Dream?"

"I've had an idea," he muses, sounding suddenly energetic, and you don't even have time to make an intrigued noise before he's continuing, "we should meet up."

"In person?"

"Yeah, you come to me or I'll come to you," enthusiasm is spilling from him, and you hear him begin to frantically type. You, however, are far more hesitant.

"Why? What would be the point?" And at your question, the tapping of the keys goes silent.

"I wanna hang out with you?" He says a little awkwardly, almost like it's a question, "I want to see you in person? You're one of my best friends? I think it'd be funny for two of the biggest faceless streamers to do a meet-up before either of us face reveal? Take your pick," he sounds a little defensive.

"I-" you find yourself touched by the sentiment, overwhelmed at his words, "I know we are friends, and I know it's kind of something we joke about, but I always figured, you know, you had George and Sap and..." you feel your chest swell with pride, "do you really think of me as one of your best friends?"

A long silence follows.

"Do you not?" He asks, sounding a little disappointed, which has you backpedaling almost immediately.

"Of course I do, but I don't -" you hesitate before admitting, "I don't really have any other best friends. I like my housemate but ours is a convenience thing more than anything else."

"You're a different kind of best friend to Sap or George, or you know, even different to Karl or Q," he tells you after a few moments of deliberation, but at least he seems to be in better spirits, "but yeah, I still consider you one of my best friends." The typing on his end of the call has tentatively resumed.

"What kind of different?" You ask gently, and are again met with hesitation.

"There's parts of how I..." He trails off and hums thoughtfully, trying to organise his thoughts, "the way we exist online- no... I mean yes but it's not quite..." Then, carefully, "you know me," and he lets it hang in the silence between you both, and you give him the time to elaborate, heart in your throat, "you know me in a way that's very hard to describe and so much harder to find, because I feel like you know me in the nichest way, you know? Since that random-ass call the day of MCC, I was like, sure about you in a way that I'd never been about another person. Like safe - I mean," and he splutters half sentences again for a few moments, like he hadn't quite meant to admit that last part, but you're glad he did. You knew exactly what feeling he was talking about, the one that burned deep in your chest, that you knew you could never dream to find the words for.

You tell him your address.

He goes quiet.

The typing continues.

"So this is it, I'm coming to visit," suddenly he sounds nervous, and despite feeling that too, you can't help but grin.

"How soon?"

"Two days?"

"Two days!" The way you cheer in confirmation is cathartic for you both; you hear him definitely hit enter to purchase the plane ticket, and he laughs like he can't believe it's really happening. Then, as the laughter dies down, your voice turns quiet and fond, "you make me feel safe too, Dream."

"Stop," he sounds plaintive but still somehow bright, "I already kind of feel like I'm about to cry, I can't believe I get to see you so soon."

"So soon," you echo the affirmation with a smile.

To celebrate you watch and movie together, ending up falling asleep on the call. All you feel when you wake is how giddy you are knowing how soon it would be until you saw your best friend in person, finally!

He insists on taking an Uber from the airport, wants your first time seeing each other to be somewhere your voices have no chance of getting recognised, so by the time you buzz him into your building your practically sick with anticipation. Pacing with your earbuds in, something about hearing the echo of his real voice at your front door just ahead of hearing him in the call, it makes it all feel so real.

"I'm gonna hang up and knock now," his tone is so gentle, like he can tell you're freaking out more than he is right now.

"Okay, love you," you blurt out on tense instinct. He hangs up but you can hear his fond laughter the moment before he starts to knock. He doesn't even get a third knock in before you've wrenched the door open, heartbeat in your ears, absolutely clueless on what to expect -

He's real. He's a real person and he's standing in front of you and your best friend Dream has kind eyes. Around the time you register that this isn't a trick, that he's got wavy hair and he's tall and pale as all fuck, you realise that you're definitely checking him out, which somehow feels weirder when it hits you that he's actually very handsome. He had a place in your heart pretty much since you met him, but this is a welcome surprise.

"Do you wanna come in?" You asked with a little laugh, stepping to the side and gesturing him in. His expression was unreadable as he stepped past you, "it's good to see you," you tried, but once you closed the door and turned around, you couldn't help but feel self conscious.

"Come on man, this is really me, I'd rather you not do a bit, I've been cleaning but I tried to -" you dip your gaze to avoid looking at him, scouring your outfit for any stains you made have noticed, hoping his reaction was to something you could fix -

"This isn't a bit, sorry, I promise," he says in a rush, stepping forward. When you finally look back up, he's smiling at you, hand hovering like he went to touch your cheek but he's not sure he's allowed, "I cannot believe you've been this pretty behind the screen this entire time, this is so unfair, I could have bought a plane ticket months ago."

Slowly, as his words sink in, you feel yourself beginning to grin and grow flustered.

"Okay, this bit I approve of -"

"Who says it's a bit?" He crowed, stepping closer to you, cupping your face with his hand, "look at your face, this isn't a bit, you're hot! Who let you be hot?" And you know that tone, have heard that smile in his words before; the fact that this smile was behind it every time?

"No, shut up, you're not allowed to simp over me, I'm meant to be simping over you; you just finished a plane and uber ride, how are you not a hot mess? Who let you be hot?" And immediately he's turning red, basking in your compliments with a wide grin.

"We're gonna be insufferable on stream, aren't we?"

"Without a doubt," you beam, and finally you pull each other into a tight hug.

After dinner you drag a second chair into what is now your office, making sure the space was set up for you both to be comfortable. Once your computer is booting up, he pulls out his phone and instructs you to make half a heart with your hand in front of the computer. He completes the heart with his own and snaps a photo, your aesthetic set up in the background.

[am I really in @Y/N's apartment IRL for the most convoluted meet up ever or am i very good at photoshop? idk you decide] is how he captions the photo, which you immediately retweet onto your main account with a link to your Twitch.

"I ain't ever seen two pretty best friends!" You quote loudly at your chat to start your stream, immediately causing Dream to laugh, leaning over to press his forehead against your shoulder while you continued on strong, "and neither will you! Welcome to the most confusing and least provable meet up! Special guest Dream, do you wanna say hello?"

"I do," he wheezed, "I'm special guest Dream, coming to you live from Y/N's office, believe it or not!"

"I'm seeing a lot of non believers here," you mumbled with faux disappointment.

"They don't have to believe," Dream points out, far less performative than he'd been a moment ago. When he smiles at you, something eases in your chest. There's no weird tension, or uncomfortable silences, or doubt. Your best friend is by your side; the only thing that matters in this moment is him.

[9tzuyu]

slipping lately

request:

+ "don't lie, your dimple usually shows when you're actually smiling. what's wrong?" & drawing on nat’s back.

warnings: talks depression, poor self care. not proofread but i didn’t give moli a chance sorry moli :3 mistakes are mine.

note: this didn’t exactly turn out the way i wanted it to, but oh well. i’m so sorry if you don’t like this bc tbh its not my fav work of mine :( 

+ also i think something has been similarly written with painting on nat back, so whoever wrote that i’m not trying to steal your idea!! i just thought the idea was a cute one :p

🏷: @c-is-writing ‹3

. . .

winter months were always hard for you. the weather was cold, the sky was grey, and the air around you was crisp, unforgiving almost.

everything was dim, lifeless it seemed. and it was no surprise when you found yourself unable to get out of bed. nothing seemed important enough to handle, even the small things like showering or eating or changing your sheets. it was too much. 

things didn’t improve much knowing natasha wouldn’t be back for another few weeks. she was a thousand miles away with minimal contact and you didn’t want to bother her when you were finally able to call her.

but things were tough, you could hardly eat, get up to shower, wash your clothes, or do anything else that involved you having to leave your bed. the others took notice, but you were quick to brush them off with a gentle reassurance. no one believed you though, and it was up to wanda to send natasha a message about what was going on. 

another two weeks went by before you were finally in natasha’s arms again. she greeted you with a kiss to the forehead, mumbling how much she missed you. 

you tried to keep your act up around her, making attempts to fix her breakfast or do her laundry for her. but natasha could see right through you, just as everyone else did. 

“baby?” she called out, snapping your attention away from your thoughts. 

“yeah?”

“think you could turn around and face me? i know how much you like kisses while we snuggle anyway.” natasha could tell you were hesitant, but didn’t comment on it. 

you nodded, turning your body to face her, burying your face between the crook of her neck. 

“i think we should talk about what’s going on. don’t worry, i’m not going anywhere.”

you wracked your brain for any excuse you had because even though you knew natasha knew, you weren’t going to give in at the snap of a finger. 

“i’m okay, natty. i just missed you is all.” you plastered on your best smile.

she pursed her lips, “don’t lie, your dimple usually shows when you’re actually smiling. what’s wrong?”

“i just missed you, that’s it.” you tried again. 

“i don’t think that’s what’s really going on here baby. you can tell me anything, you know.” natasha pushed once more.

“nothing’s going on. whatever anyone told you has got it messed up.” she quirked her eyebrow, “oh really now?” 

“i’m okay, nat.”

“no you aren’t. let me help you, talk to me sweetheart.” her lips kissed the top of your head for the third time that night. you bit the inside of your cheek, nuzzling your face under her chin. should you tell her? or should you not? 

and finally you caved.

"i'm just so tired, nat."

"of what?”

"everything. my mind is a mess right now and i don't know how to make it stop." the sound of your voice pinched a hole in natasha's heart. she placed a small kiss to your cheek, "i'm sorry baby."

 "s'okay." you mumbled.

“how have you been taking care of yourself while i was gone? be honest with me please.” she pleaded, but all you could do was shrug. 

“how’s your eating been?”

“not great, i’m sorry.” your lip quivered. “hey, no, don’t apologize. what can i do to help?” you thought about it for a moment before something finally came to mind. 

“would you be willing to do something kinda.. i don’t know, weird?”

“what’s that, sweetheart?” she smiled.

“can i draw on your back?”

another kiss was placed to your head.

“of course. no dicks, okay? you know i’m a lesbian.” natasha giggled, letting you crawl out from her death grip around your body.

“i promise natty.” 

you rushed to get the washable markers hidden under your nightstand, giving natasha a sheepish smile when you noticed her watching you. 

“you like to color?” she teased, flashing you her signature smirk.

“sometimes...”

natasha took off her shirt and unclipped her bra, tossing them to the side of your shared bed and laid flat on her stomach. not a minute later she felt the weight of your hips against her back and the tips of your markers drawing line after line against her skin.

she let out a small giggle after the first few strokes, commenting on the fact that it tickled her back. 

“what are you drawing anyway?” your lips met her shoulder blade, “it’s a surprise.”

another twenty or so minutes went by and you were done. however, when you went to check on natasha she was already fast asleep. you quickly snapped a picture of her back to show her the next morning before quietly putting away your supplies. 

a part of you felt better, but there was definitely a long way to go. one night of using a coping skill wasn’t going to fix you, but with natasha’s help you knew you’d be able to pull yourself out of it.

[the-girl-who-cried-wolf]

9, 11, 30, 33, for the ask thingy (bonus 13 cus im struggling with writers block rn and it sucks)

- random anon

hello random anon!! thanks for the ask 💜 as expected, i rambled. i would say sorry but i literally knew this was going to happen. so. i hope you wanted detailed answers...

9. Least favorite trope to write.

this is a hard one! i can't think of any that i actively dislike, but ig...enemies to lovers?? i LOVE reading it, but every time i've tried writing it, it turns out horrible and i never post. so. maybe i'm just too soft for that trope, idk, but its hard to write. thats literally all i can think of-

11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.

well. i doubt any of this will make any sense, but lets dive into the terrifying depths of my Writer Brain anyway...

most times, fics start with An Idea. its usually just a random thought i've had, which could be anything from an outfit i would love to see a character wear to the Deepest Darkest Feelings of a certain canon moment - it's varied and fucking wild - and then, i just think. for a few days or weeks maybe, depending on how long i intend the fic to be, i have this fic idea growing in the back of my mind as i start to build up the beginning of a plot, and i outline some goals and things i want to achieve when i write this fic. (i picture it as a little timeline running of into the distance with tags stuck on the Important Plot Points, with relevant words and images, but that's just me. its weird, i know, bare with me.)

once The Idea is settled and some semblance of a plot has been mentally sketched out, i open a doc and just start writing. for longer fics, i may keep a doc for planning - writing down scenes that are in my mind, or random visuals and lines that i think of, and sometimes even song lyrics that i find inspiring for the fic, etc - but for shorter fics, i just dive right in and get writing.

(sidenote: i've found that the process is different for longer fics vs shorter fics. obviously. theres a lotttt more planning for long fics, and i usually end up making a playlist and a pinterest board for them to keep the ideas coming as i write. short fics usually get smashed out in a few hours, probably at midnight, then i edit a little and post. im kinda lazy with editing and rewriting tho. rip.)

now, we come to the writing itself. i like to set aside a fair amount of time for writing, like, i dont just randomly write a line every now and then - i make time for me to sit down for a hour or however long i've got, and focus on writing. i follow the hazy map of plot points in my mind, and i fill in the blanks as i go. if im completely honest, i dont plan a lot of shit. i just blurt words and sometimes it comes out nicely.

i think that pretty much covers it. other than obsessively editing and rereading over the long fics, or scanning the shorter ones a little, i post it and move on <3

30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.

oh god. this is...hard. ill just throw some random lines in without context or explanation bc im crazy. here goes-

- He tries to muster some kind of smile in response as he tugs his headphones down around his neck, Led Zeppelin blasting out the speakers freely now, but he must fail terribly because Calum’s smile slips from his face, just like the batter that drips from the spoon he’s holding, landing in the mixing bowl underneath. It melts smoothly into the rest of the mixture and disappears, and Luke stares at where it landed, wishing he could bring it back. (x)

- Luke’s lingering hand tangles back in Calum’s hair. Soft strands of it threading through his fingers and Calum’s eyes fluttering shut like a butterfly’s wings, then gently pushing his head up into Luke's hand as he rolls over a little more, searching for just a little more of the warmth of Luke’s body against his. (x)

- And he’s gone. But she’s still there. The world has suddenly and violently stopped spinning, but she’s still there, smiling at painting in her mind, of a spinning girl. (x)

- He opened his eyes, and for a second, the silhouette of a boy still stood in front on him, a spark in his eyes and hope in every breath. Wishing for a bright future, planning for great and marvelous things that would never come to pass. (x)

33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing?

as a general rule, yes. i like blocking out the rest of the world and listening to music that fits the fic im writing, because music is always my biggest inspiration. for many fics, especially longer ones, ill make a playlist that suits the vibes which i can then listen to whenever i write that fic. but sometimes i write without music just so i can focus better, and not be distracted by the music, which helps me make more conscious word choices and structural/grammatical choices too.

13. How do you deal with writers block?

ahh writers block (derogatory). sigh. honestly, i dont think there is a cure for writers block, but staying open to inspirations is one suggestion i can offer. listening to music, watching the world around you, consuming media you enjoy...all that helps your mind take in ideas, and even if you can't seem to write anything out, it's good to keep your mind open and filled with something. and with writers block, i would say to NOT make yourself write if you dont feel like it. that takes the enjoyment out of it and makes it seem like a task you have to complete, which it isn't!! writing is here for you to have fun!! you just have to wait it out until you want to write again, and in the meantime, take in all the inspiration that you can.

thank you sm for asking all this, i had a lot of fun writing these answers out! and i hope your writers block doesn't last long too. sending good vibes your way!!! 💜💜💜

writers ask game

[krewbies]

I'm so glad to see Bolin fics bc your girl has had a crush on him for awhile. Can you write something where Bolin proposes? Timeline wise, sometime after saving the city in book 4? 👉👈

awww i love this :( i hope you enjoy!!!

••••••

The last month had been absolutely insane. You and Bolin had both been busy- the Earth Kingdom was pulling itself together again, Republic City was still recuperating from Kuvira’s attack, but there was still a sense of peace. For now, everything had been resolved.

Bolin. Boy, was he thankful for you. You had supported him, rooted for him, since the days when the two of you had just been two clueless teenagers in a big city. Sure, you gave him a hard time about unknowingly working under a fascist regime, but that was quickly forgiven after he helped save the Beifongs. And, sure, sometimes you could be overbearing, you didn’t want him to hurt himself after all!

It was so daunting for him, standing in a flashy jewelry store. He had grown up poor after all, he was used to just scraping by with Mako. But Mako wasn’t there, and neither were you, but the memory of a wedding- Varrick and Zhu Li’s- was fresh in his mind. 

It was standing there, seeing you in the crowd, sitting with his brother and closest friends, glossy eyed and awe stricken, that he realized how ready he was to let you know just how much he appreciated and adored you.

The ring he picked was small and modest. Big and expensive wasn’t exactly something that either of you enjoyed. Your relationship had always been surrounded by chaos and dramatics and other people’s conflicts, and deep down, you both just wanted simple after all these years. You weren’t teenagers anymore, and there were no more wars to be fought, and there was finally room for peace.

~

“It’s so pretty.” You sighed, glancing up at the evening sky. Bolin turned his head to admire you, his eyes following the curve of your nose and examining the color of your eyes as if he hadn’t already memorized his favorite color a thousand times.

“Well, I think you’re a lot prettier.” His voice cracked. That always happened when he was nervous. And he was wringing his hands. You decided not to ask. Instead, you laughed, trying to ease whatever was running through his mind. He wasn’t one to hide anything he was feeling, so he’d tell you when he was ready to.

“Y’know, it’s so weird that we met here- wow, it’s been 5 or 6 years now.” You swung your legs and ran your hands over the wood of the bench. It was nostalgic, and reminded you of when things were simple, and you reached out to take his hand. 

Now or never. Now or never. His hands were oddly sweaty too. Huh. He stood up abruptly, back turned to you, leg shaking slightly.

“Um, okay, so, I’m, uh, usually good at talking, but I’m not right now because I love you so much and I don’t want this to end badly, I feel like you feel the same way but I’m not sure and-”

“Bo!” You stopped him in the middle of his speech, turning his body around and taking his face in your hands. He glanced at you as you stroked his cheeks, taking a deep breath. “What’s wrong?” You continued after a few long seconds of silence. He looked down at the ground and hesitantly opened his mouth again.

“(Y/N), I just... I love you so much. And, and all of the stuff that’s happened in the last few years has made me realize how lost I would be without you. You laugh at all my jokes, and you’re always there whether things are going good for me or not, you always make sure I’m okay,” He took a deep breath and shot you a sweet smile, and reached a hand up to twist the piece of hair on his forehead. “And Mako likes you! That’s so great! I’m saying so much, I don’t even know where I’m going. At... At the end of the day I just want you to be safe and happy, and I want me to be happy too, and I would be happiest if,” He slowly knelt down, taking one of your hands in his, and proudly showing you what he had picked out. “If you would just be mine forever?”

Your heart raced. This wasn’t happening, it couldn’t be. You wanted to cry. You had never entertained the thought of him asking you; it had always felt too good to be true. That he was so perfect, and he only wanted you. A million thoughts ran through your head, but one was louder than the others, and it helped you utter a simple response.

“Of course.” You stared at each other for a moment, hearts racing and the cool night air surrounding you. Finally, finally, a smile sprung on his face as he picked himself up, placing both of his hands on your shoulders.

“Really?” You stopped yourself from giggling at his shocked expression,

“I’d be an idiot to not want to spend the rest of my life with you.” You replied, tears threatening to spill. He engulfed you in one of the best hugs you’ve ever had, warming you up inside and out. This was it. This is what all of that was for. 

He kissed you softly after he pulled away. “Wait! We have to go tell everyone!” He was so giddy, rocking up and down on the balls of his feet, shaking you. “This is so exciting. I get to marry you.” Every reservation you had ever held in your life was gone, and they were replaced by the knowledge that he would be yours and you would be his.

~

i hope you enjoyed!!!! i just wanted to say, thank you guys so much. I made this blog thinking it would just be a fun past time but you are all so kind, my inbox has been flooded with the kindest things, i spent like an hour crying over it earlier. i’m sorry its been a few days since i last put something out, ive just been insanely busy and ive been jumping between writing things because i have a ton of requests. i just wanna give you all a hug! i feel like i hit 100 followers overnight and now i’m at around 140, its surreal. thank you. ps, this can perhaps be read as a sequel to the hcs i did about the airbender? but its up to u ;)

[raccoonpoptart]

wanted to share this scenario idea bcs it's adorable ;; it's where the reader accidentally made a mistake in casting a spell, ehich resulted in them turning into an animal! i'm wondering how the characters would react to them huhu

YESSS THIS IS SO CUTE THANKYOU 🌸✨ this is so funny to think about honestly could you imagine suddenly turning into an animal? personally if i turned into a raccoon i would never want to be human again 🦝🦝🦝

☼

that’s not how that goes...

warnings: none! wholesome times tonight <3

some of the animal choices are obvious but others are...just for giggles 🐝 hope you like it! ✨

Earlier at the market y/n got some new ingredients to use in a spell, but had to substitute a few obscure things with more easily accesible items. With nothing but hope in their heart (that they wouldn’t absolutely ruin anything important), they made their way home.

It wasn’t until about halfway through the spell that y/n realized something was a bit...off. The smell just seemed a bit more potent, and the color was a little more unexpected than usual. Magic was strange like that, so they shrugged and threw the last ingredient in the bowl. Poof! Smoke went everywhere and y/n was covered in green dust.

Suddenly, everything grew so much bigger in the shop and y/n began to panic. Asra wouldn’t be home for a few hours! What were they supposed to do? Their heart raced as they walked to the nearest mirror. They realized that it wasn’t the shop that got bigger, it was them who got smaller. Uh oh...

alright gamers lets do this

Asra

when he came home he looked everywhere for you and when he saw the mess you made he started to panic a little

he had no idea what you were trying to do but the fact that you weren’t around was...really unsettling

“mc?? where are you? please come back...”

suddenly he felt something slip up his arm and squeeze...

“oh, hi, faust...did you s-”

what looked back at him wasn’t those red eyes he was used to but instead it was two big purple eyes

he was about to scream (because who wouldn’t freak out over a random snake) when he heard your voice in his head

i think i messed up the spell :(

he laughed softly and placed a soft kiss on your head and assured you if he couldn’t fix it, it would probably wear off anyway

spoiler alert it took almost a whole day for it to wear off but he enjoyed having you wrap around him whenever he went anywhere

faust thought it was the best thing ever, she would wrap around asra’s left arm and you would be on his right

Bite the goat!

(i was so tempted to do a fox but i thought it would be cute to sorta be like a chimes and flamel moment)

Nadia

when she was told that a lynx had been spotted sneaking around the palace she was a little worried

lynx are not common, so of course she wanted to see! but when the lynx ran up to her and started to rub against her and purr?? she was very confused

it wasn’t until she saw your eyes that she realized it was you! but didn’t really know how she knew...it was just her intuition she guessed

she just assumed something magical happened and hugged you

loved when you followed her around the palace because everyone was so afraid, or just had a puzzled look on their face

when you would meowl (or, yell for lack of a better word) she would smile and kiss your head then laugh if anyone around her got scared

would talk to you like normal even if you couldn’t properly answer, she just assumed any noise you’d make was a response

complimented your ears and thick coat then offered to brush your fur (she wanted to hear you purr again)

she enjoyed having you around all day and once you were back to normal she asked so many questions

Julian

another damn raven had taken a liking to him and he was ready to leave vesuvia again

he facepalmed as malak and this new bird had started messing with his hair and squawking

meanwhile you found it pretty funny how he accepted it so quickly and waited a while before having malak tell julian

you and malak had continued to bother julian for a few hours but once he got annoyed you had malak explain and julian just laughed and asked if malak had run into a window again

when you softly pecked his nose and rubbed against his face he blushed softly

“ah, well...at least it’s temporary. it is temporary, right? please tell me it won’t last forever!”

boi was a bit stressed because now he felt like he had to look after you but malak told him to *ahem* buzz off we’ll say cause he was having so much fun

found the looks he got a bit funny because of course having two ravens follow you everywhere would look strange (CAN I MAKE A NORSE MYTHOLOGY JOKE PLS.....TWO RAVENS = ODIN LMAO)

once the spell wore off he held you close and let out a sigh of relief,,, “darling, you make a beautiful bird but please don’t scare me like that again <3”

Muriel

ignore the part where it says the shop got bigger, for this it got smaller ok thanks <3

inanna had been gone a while so he went out to find her

instead found her outside playing with a......bear?

he closed his eyes and exhaled then turned to go back inside to avoid dealing with another unexplainable thing

but inanna dragged him over to the bear and he just stared as the bear stared back

woof! “inanna that makes no sense, it’s not mc”

then the bear hugged him and he blushed but didn’t pull away because why else would a bear have silver fur and pink eyes

you couldn’t exactly fit in his hut so he decided to just sit outside with you. he assumed that a spell went wrong because the same thing had happened to asra before

“so, mc... do you think this is permanent?” you grunted in response and placed a paw on his head

it was a bit awkward but he laughed softly and placed a hand on your head (wholesome mountain man :( i would die for him...)

watching you catch fish was hilarious to him considering you couldn’t do it by yourself a few months ago, but made sure to keep an eye on you anyway

he liked that you were taller than him for a bit and felt safe when you would hug him, even if the sight of it would seem strange but was happy when you were back to normal (now he can kiss the top of your head and hold your hands properly)

Portia

walked into her cottage and stopped in her tracks

she was face to face a puma and her heart started racing, she was about to run until she saw pepi run up onto the bigger cat’s head and headbutt her

“pepi.....can you please explain who this is quickly” she was trying not to freak out in case the giant cat would attack her

in response pepi started to purr and rubbed against the cat and was surprised when the big cat started to purr too

she thought that maybe pepi had somehow made a new friend? and just was grateful that it didn’t eat her

you had to lead her back to the shop and show her the mess as well as the pile of your clothes on the ground for her to understand

“mc :3 does that mean you’re technically naked?~” she poked your side and laughed when you made a slightly annoyed noise

absolutely loved how everyone ran at the sight of her with a puma and walked with a bit more confidence “i feel like the main character in a story! strong, beautiful woman with her most trusted cats at her side!”

you wished you could laugh but you loved how adorable she was and also you were amazed at how even though you were walking, pepi stayed asleep on your back

after work the next day she found you asleep in her bed wearing some of her clothes and she smiled so big as she hugged you tight

Lucio

“can somebody please explain why the hell a damn PEACOCK IS IN MY ROOM???”

as he raised his voice, the bird puffed up its feathers and started to squawk which freaked him out but it just walked up to him and stared

he was so confused but was thankful the bird wasn’t attacking him so he tried talking to it

“uhhhh- hello there, aren’t you beautiful? are you an albino? your white feathers are gorgeous” you puffed up your chest at the compliments and expanded your tail feathers

he smiled and tried to pet your tail feathers “you aren’t so scary now, how’d you get in here?” he didn’t really think to ask anyone because the only person he could think of was asra and he didn’t want to talk to him

mercedes and melchior liked the bird so why shouldn’t he? he shrugged and just let you follow him around all day, talking to you like you were another one of his pets (which was annoying but you liked the compliments althought they were new, obviously you didn’t normally have feathers)

the spell wore off in the middle of the night he went from having two dogs and a bird in his bed to having two dogs....and YOU!! just when he thought being with you couldn’t have brought more surprises and weird stories

he gave you his shirt and laughed as you explained what happened ,, “well, it’s good it was temporary! if i never saw you as a human again i don’t know what i would do”

☼

that was so fun!! omg i love writing weird stuff like this 🍓 anyway, i hope you liked it! i’m thinking about writing a story where mc can turn into animals on the regular but we’ll see ✨✨ now i wish i could turn into an animal for a day lmao

[theshinsun]

A-Z for honesty hour because I'm an asshole. :D

A - If I’m in love.

...yes. I never thought I would be again, I thought I’d been too hurt and jaded to feel this way again, but against all odds, I’m back to being 17 in full force.

B - Who the last person I talked to on the phone was.

The only one who ever calls me is my mother. And customers at work.

C - How long it’s been since I’ve kissed.

damn, almost a year now… not since my last relationship ended back in October-ish. even then, it was mostly casual pecks idk if we ever seriously made out tbh.

D - If I have a preference for boys or girls.

already answered (twice) but I'll keep going… I've got a definite preference of guys over girls, but I'm also a bi disaster and sometimes it doesn't make a lot of sense why this person is instantly attractive to me while that person isn't. certain aspects of femininity do appeal to me, but weirdly other aspects seem to be a turn-off and I can't always put my finger on what or why. ...that caveat does not apply to masculinity though, even if it's traditionally "masculine" features on a feminine-presenting individual I am 100% down every time.

E - How many holes I have in my ears.

two and a half? I got a third piercing at some point halfway up the lobe but it got infected and scarred over I think. the holes I do have are also stretched (I'm up to 0G now) and I've been meaning to get some more.

F - Give me any options, like ‘hot or cold?’

wasn't given any options, so I guess I'll go with hot or cold lol. I prefer hot, I'm one of those weirdos who loves summer because of the heat and I'll usually take a hot food/drink over a cold one.

G - The last person I said ‘I love you’ to.

my mom, over the phone just now.

H - The last person I hugged.

my roommate. we're not always super touchy-feely with each other but I've been feeling kind of down and she noticed.

I - The last time I felt jealous, and why.

I'm not usually a very jealous person, but the last time I really felt that way… I'd recently broken up with my ex, and they were sitting on someone else's lap and I… felt things. part of the reason I realized I may have made a mistake.

J - Are you insecure. What about?

K - What my full name is

already answered, my first and middle are Jacob Brooks, I'm not putting my last name out there sorry I don't trust like that.

L - If I have siblings.

already answered, I've got two, an older brother and a younger sister.

M - If I forgive betrayal.

I mean, I forgive but I don't forget, ya know? like I'll accept an apology if it's sincere and welcome the person back and never bring it up again, but I'm probably gonna be cautious around them in the future, and not trust them as readily as I would have before.  

N - If you want to know how I treat my friends.

if I call someone my friend it means I really feel close with them, and I treat my friends basically like my family. I try to always be honest and supportive of them, bc I love and appreciate them and just want them to be happy. 

O - If I like my school.

I love my school. the campus is beautiful, the teachers are fantastic, and I just love being there and learning and growing in my classes. I'm really sad this semester is probably going to be mostly online because I really feel like I belong in those studios and on that campus and I miss it.

P - What kind of music I like.

already answered, and it mostly boiled down to all over the fuckin place, so this time… band recommendations, here we go. no you have no say in this.

here, have a clump of random favorite bands off the top of my head: mother mother, bad suns, nothing but thieves, hozier, shearwater, the neighbourhood, steam powered giraffe, rainbow kitten surprise, the oh hellos, gregory alan isakov, caravan palace, mystery skulls, khai dreams, autoheart, muse, silversun pickups, thousand foot krutch, two door cinema club, twenty one pilots, blue october, jukebox the ghost

Q - What the last party I went to was, and when the next will be.

I'm not a partier at All, but I did have a bunch of friends over for the 4th (okay I say a bunch but it was like four people from our usual less-socially distant circle). I have no idea when the next get-together will be, it's kinda hard to plan those kinds of things lately.

R - For me to tell 10 of my curiosities.

the phrasing of this question is weird but I'm gonna assume it means things I'm curious about? let's go with that.

travel. I haven't ever been out of the country and I'd like to see other parts of the world at least at some point in my life.

tattoos. both getting them and learning to do them, it's a niche branch of art that I'm just fascinated by and I might like to do it as a career if I knew more about it.

same thing with being a florist. I'm really drawn to it as a concept and I'm super curious how it works, but I have no idea what kind of… qualifications and whatnot I'd need for that.

 surfing. I'm surrounded by the lifestyle and now kind of own a surfboard, I just want to know what the appeal is.

this may be a bit tmi, but I'm really curious what it's like to have a dick. I don't suppose I'll strictly ever know, but I still really want to… probably one of the biggest things to clue me in that I'm definitely trans is the literal penis envy ngl. 

I've always kind of had a fascination with the ocean, and I'd love to go like, scuba diving or something someday, to see it up close and personal.

I think everyone has the impulse thought of shaving their head at some point. maybe someday I will I don't quite have the balls to do it now.

I've gone this long in my life and never wielded a sword? a travesty. I don't pretend to have the grace to actually know how to use one, but I've like, never even held a real one and the idea interests me a lot.

this one might be slightly morbid curiosity, but I don't think I've ever been like, properly drunk or high before, like I've been tipsy but I've never been wasted, you know? the idea kind of scares me and I don't think I'm going to go out and remedy it, but it's still there, and even if I know it's not a good idea, I do still wonder what that's like.

same vein, maybe even a little darker, but I've got at least a little morbid curiosity about like, death and real danger. again, not planning to act on it At All, but the thought is still lurking in the back of my mind like what if…? you asked for honesty.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

S - 2 habits.

bit of a new habit, but I have a whole ritual of disinfecting groceries when I bring them home, and then disinfecting the door knobs and counters. I don't know if it'll persist after the pandemic is over, but it's already ingrained in me and I don't feel comfortable if I skip it or do  it differently.

I apologize for things that aren't my fault. it's such an instinct at this point to say "sorry" when I'm uncomfortable or anxious that it doesn't even register anymore, even when people tell me not to be sorry, I'm still gonna say it, sorry.

T - 5 things I love unconditionally.

already answered so here's 5 more

my family. if I haven't got my family I haven't got anything, we've got each others' backs and I won't turn on them for anything

my friends. same deal, I owe so much to my friends, I love them, and that won't change no matter what they decide to do or be.

sleep. I love sleep so much, even if it's just an involuntary nap, though for someone who loves it so much I sure don't get enough of it

spotify. I know it has problems, I know there are probably more streamlined/cheaper music streaming services out there, but at this point, I've sunk too much of my time and energy into this one and I'll never give it up

my ocs. I don't talk about them very much on this platform, but I have them, they're my children, and I love them even if they're assholes and never easy to write/draw. 

U - How many texts I send daily.

already answered, the number varies, and sometimes swings drastically between like, 5 and 35 on any given day.

V - 3 big dreams.

graduate art school. it's gonna be a serious undertaking and probably take several more years and a lot of loans at this point, but I'm still determined to get there someday.

someday I want to write a book. I know I've said that before on a different prompt, but it wouldn't be a list of dreams without including this one that I've held onto since childhood. 

this one's kind of vague, but someday… I want to not be afraid anymore. like I want to finally be in a state of mental/financial security so I can live my life without the fear of what's coming next. 

W - An idol.

it's probably really basic to list a youtuber, but I've still gotta go with Chase Ross. the guy was an inspiration and a major source of information and support for me early-on in my transition, and even watching him now I still want to approach life with the pure positive energy and confidence that he has. 

X - If I’ve done something I regret very much.

yes. a couple things, really… some of which I don't think I'll ever be able to make up for.

Y - If I like my town and why.

my current town? yeah, it's got its problems but it's also beautiful and full of life and art and unique energy and I miss the days before the Corona End Times when I could actually go out and enjoy it.

Z - Ask any question you want.

??? I did not receive any specification for this one, and given that I didn't skip even the duplicate answers and this is ridiculously long, this one I'm gonna SKIP.

[phantom-does-a-thing]

6, 7, 29? :D

6) What element of writing do you find comes easily?

HMMM descriptions of like scenery or just setting in general, its one of my favorite things to write. I am an absolutely sucker for over describing things or trying to make things sound overly poetic and I love just describing things so much. It's very fun and I do it for so many things (not even writing, sometimes straight up in conversations). It's actually very helpful sometimes when I'm trying to explain things

7) What element of writing do you struggle with most?

UHhh hmm. Overusing descriptions or being in a situation where this *thing* is continuously happening and I'm running out of ways to remind the reader that yeah this is still a thing without making the writing sound boring. Pain for an example is difficult for me to write bc it's hard to continuously focus on the fact that this character is in pain while not using the same wording over and over again (and that is where the super weird analogies come from)

Characterization is also kind of hard for me, even with my OCs it's always just a bit hard to know if I'm writing them correctly or if I'm mischaracterizing them completely.

29) Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

oh my god I know there are some fics that were definitely outside my comfort zone I am blanking right now hold on.

The entire dnd poisons series that I have is not completely, but a little bit out of my comfort zone since I usually don't go THAT heavy on the whump. Uhhh I know that any time I've written a major character death fic that was WILDLY outside my comfort zone (I really hate character death fics, but I have written a few of them myself). The major character death ones... they went... I wouldn't say WELL because I think all or most of them are like 2 years old and I don't like my old fics very much.

This fic was also something that immediately came to mind because it was heavily focused on romance with little ambiguity that you could say "yeah this is platonic" which is how I usually write stuff even if I have romance in mind. Like it was very out of my comfort zone when I wrote it but I do think that the fic turned out well and I am very happy with it, so good thing I did go out of my comfort zone for that LOL.