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nopoodles · 2 years

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I posted 834 times in 2022

That's 717 more posts than 2021!

185 posts created (22%)

649 posts reblogged (78%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@nopoodles

@emelkae

@ren-c-leyn

@avrablake

@asher-orion-writes

I tagged 496 of my posts in 2022

Only 41% of my posts had no tags

#guardian cadet series - 50 posts

#writing - 46 posts

#fiction - 44 posts

#short story - 40 posts

#fantasy - 39 posts

#lgbt characters - 32 posts

#hi there potential friend - 31 posts

#merry arlan - 31 posts

#lgbtqia+ - 29 posts

#merry arlan: breaking the curse - 26 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#sometimes i regret naming commander whitclé what i did because i have no accented e on my keyboard so i have to search and copy every time

My Top Posts in 2022:

My wife told me that when she first read Dracula she read it at a very measured pace, as if she were someone reading Jonathan Harker's journal and wondering if what he out down was truth or simply a reaction to sleep deprivation. Until the 12 May entry where the belief is suddenly ingrained in the sheer inhumanity of the action.

She told me she finds it interesting that, when I've been reading it aloud to her through the course of Dracula daily, I read it like Jonathan Harker experiencing it immediately, and desperately trying to parse out what happened. As if my reading is happening sometime between the events themselves and when Jonathan writes them down. It's a little frantic, it's at speed, it's with emotional emphasis that she never would have included.

This is not to say that either reading is better or worse, I am inclined to believe I read in a more immersed way because I'm an author so I'm used to putting myself in characters shoes, but it could just as easily be that my wife can't picture things in her mind and I can, or the age at which we have each read it, or my dyslexia, or a whole host of other possibilities.

I just thought it was interesting

24 notes - Posted May 14, 2022

I've been reading Dracula Daily aloud to my wife (who read the novel around 14 years ago and remembers the overall plot and key moments but not much else) and we met Quincy today so I did my best attempt at a Texan accent (you know, from someone who has never been to the continent Texas is on let alone to Texas itself) during Lucy's letter* for 24th.

And then we get to 25th and I read John Seward's diary (audio-note?)° and I scroll down and go "Quincy? Is that the — ah shit I have to do the cowboy voice for a whole entire letter!?" And my wife offers me a grin filled with such schadenfreude-esque glee that tells me she will accept nothing less than my pre-established I-don't-know-what-Texans-sound-like accent.

*am I going to address the painfully casual racism and misogyny in Lucy's letter? Probably only in so far as this note acknowledging it exists and that I was very put off by it but not going into detail I don't currently have the nuance or spoons to handle

° Yeah, also not diving into Seward and his asylum here

45 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

Had an argument with my wife (argument is a strong word) while reading Dracula Daily because I pointed out the Bram Stoker uses an apostrophe-s after names that end in S (Morris's) but she insisted I edit out all my apostrophe-s on names ending in S in Merry Arlan: Breaking The Curse (eg Larrings) to just be an apostrophe.

When I pointed this out with words along the lines of "why can Bram Stoker do this and you made me not do it!?"

She said, "because Bram Stoker is wrong."

The boldness. The certainty. (Also everyone else also said edit out Larrings's and replace it with Larrings' so, like, not just my wife.)

91 notes - Posted June 9, 2022

Dracula Daily thoughts 22 September

My wife said in passing as we finished todays entry: I am enjoying it better this time [compared to when she read it 15-odd years ago]. I think it benefits from being older when you read it.

And it got me (Will) thinking. I've seen someone comment on it before and I've shared ideas similar to this in reference to other pieces but, we really don't have the lived experience required for a lot of classic novels when we have to study them, and, ironically enough, the reason is because they're written for people with more lived experience than us.

Most novels will centre their protagonist's age (or ages) around that of their intended reader (obviously there's leeway here, especially in adult novels) and the age of our primary protagonist's in Dracula? Marriageable age. (Which is somewhere in their twenties by approximation).

So when my wife read this as a teen, she didn't have the lived experience of adulthood and relationships to formulate a real connection with the characters the way she does now. She's married now, and an adult, and only a little older than our main cast (maybe not older than all of them). Her link is stronger because that experience is designed to bond you to the characters.

But we read classic novels in school, before we gain these experiences, and we don't connect with the characters because they were never designed with teenagers in mind. And people decide they don't like classic literature. And there's nothing wrong with not liking classic lit, but we're not setting people up for success with them in the first place so.... How can we be surprised?

Anyway, if you've been enjoying Dracula Daily despite not having enjoyed classic lit before, don't be afraid to embark on another trial (whether it be through an e-mailed format or just picking up a copy), find a piece of classic lit you're interested in and just give it a go. If it's still not for you and Dracula Daily is an exception, that's totally cool, and if it's not the exception, you've opened up a whole avenue of literature you might have otherwise avoided because teenage you was too young to find any enjoyment*

(feel free to ask for suggestions, my wife is a font of classic lit knowledge and I can ask my bibliophile mum too)

*also don't at me about how you liked classic lit as a kid/teen. I know there's plenty of you out there. Good for you, that's not what this is about but feel free to share your fave classic lit and why you like it to help other people find the stuff that's good for them.

160 notes - Posted September 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Not me coming into the Daily Dracula thing late so trying to catch up with the backlog of journal entries and reading it aloud to my wife (who has read Dracula before but not for about 14 years) and coming across a new and strange word: goitre.

So I do what any logical person reading on a tiny pocket computer would do. I look it up.

And I tell my wife, "according to the NHS website it's a medical condition characterized by a swelling if the throat and most cases (90%) are because of a lack of iodine and thyroid issues."

Then idly wondering as I swap back to the text of Dracula, "why do all these people living near Dracula have Iodine deficiencies?" Piecing things together for sure, just not the right things.

"So," I summarise aloud for my wife, "they've all got swollen throats." Relocate myself in the text and freeze.

"Ohhhhhhhh!" With dawning realisation about the fact that peasants living near Dracula's castle all have swollen throats and knowing what I know, that Jonathan Harker does not know, about Dracula and his penchant for necks.

And my wife smiles that slow smile, the one she does when she's proud and amused all at once. A smile that reads like "I think it's hilarious that it took you so long but I'm also really glad I got to see you figure it out, you smart little oblivious bean."

And maybe I'm a bit like Jonathan Harker actually...

232 notes - Posted May 7, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #I'm apparently my own number one fan

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duhragonball · 3 years

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Disinterpretation

I finally finished the Sarah Z video about “pro vs. anti”. It’s pretty long, and I ended up watching it in chunks over several days, but I think it’s worth watching, especially if you’re sort of partially connected to online fandom, but not enough to be aware of all the lingo.

As I expected, the whole thing was vague and confusing because the people involved in the conflict made it vague and confusing. In theory, the full terms would be “pro-shipping” and “anti-shipping”, but it seems like it’s more about particular kinds of ships that could be considered controversial. But that’s a slippery slope, and apparently the whole conflict mutated into both sides deciding that every hypothetical relationship between fictional characters is either equally valid or equally dangerous.

Long story short, it’s just purity culture, which was what everyone on Tumblr was calling it around 2012. But now, if you’re a sane person who genuinely asks: “Who gives a fuck about Voltron?”, these people will jump your ass and accuse you of being on the side of their enemies. “Children have died over the importance of Lotor/Hagger! Your callous indifference proves that you yourself must have murdered children!”

I think what Sarah Z really hit upon in this video was that media consumption has become so ingrained in our culture that people feel like it has to go hand-in-hand with our morality. That is, it’s not enough for me to watch Star Trek, I have to justify Star Trek as evidence that I’m a good person. Maybe this is where the expression “guilty pleasure” comes from. Conversely, it’s not enough for me to not watch Dr. Who, I have to somehow convince everyone that Dr. Who was invented by the devil.

I’m pretty sure the Reylo ship has a lot to do with this, since it’s kind of understood to be a dark, problematic concept, and fans either embrace its flaws or recoil in horror because of them. Star Wars itself is a dumb story about space wizards, so people try to give the debate more weight by linking it to freedom of self expression and/or enabling real world harm. Suddenly it’s not enough to just think two actors would look cute making out instead of fighting. Now it’s this battlefield for the soul of civilization or something.

I grew up in the 80′s, when “concerned parents” and grifters would accuse the Smurfs and metal bands of promoting satanism and witchcraft. I used to hear stories of teens going out into the woods in the middle of the night to do occult stuff, and all I could ever think about was: “Why would anyone bother wandering out in the woods in the middle of the night?” Which is why “concerned parents” turned their attention to things that were closer to home, like Saturday morning cartoons. It had nothing to do with the content; it was just about finding a safe, accessible target for their hysteria. Some people want to go on a crusade without leaving the house, so they pick a fight with Papa Smurf instead of confronting the real evils in the world. Even as a kid, I knew this was a con, because I’d watched the show for myself and knew it was too saccharine to be threat to anyone.

The pro/anti folks have tried to disguise this with a lot of terminology. I wondered why they seemed to reluctant to use the full terms “pro-shipper” and “anti-shipper”, and it’s probably a couple of things. First, the word “shipper” is basically an admission that this is pointless bullshit that doesn’t matter, and they’d like to avoid that connotation. Second, they seem to have decided that this goes beyond shipping itself, into practically anything else they want it to involve. It’s all part of the con, which is to make you believe that it’s “us vs. them”, and you can be part of “us” by curating specific attitudes about Steven Universe.

Seriously, “about Steven Universe” is such an incredible punchline. You can make anything funnier by adding those three words to the end of a sentence. “Do not interact if you blog about Steven Universe.” “Hey, what’s up, YouTube, this is SSJ3RyokoLover69, and this is going to be kind of a serious video about Steven Universe.” “Mrs. Johnson, the results of your biopsy are in, and I have some bad news about Steven Universe.” It’s a fucking kids show. “Oh no, all the characters look like the characters in all the other kids shows!” Yeah, that’s because it’s a kids show. Marvin looks like Garfield, this isn’t new.

The common denominator here seems to be that both sides try to wrap themselves in the flag of vulnerable groups: impressionable minors, trauma survivors, harassment victims, etc. The “pros” want to protect those people so that they can feel free to explore weird subject matter on their own terms, and the “antis” want to protect the same people from being exposed to weird subject matter that they might not want to see. It’s all about establishing a moral high ground. Back in the day, it was called “sanctimony”.

But people get roped into this, because at their core, people want approval, and this stupid conflict offers them a sense of community. As long as you support the cause, whatever it may be, you’ll have this online friend network that appears to support anything you do. But if you deviate from their norm, you’ll be cast out. Does this sound familiar?

To use a more familiar example, I still sometimes find people clamoring about Gochi vs. Vegebul. I’ve never understood this, because both ships were canon, and I never saw much direct evidence of a war between them, but people would still talk about how crazy the Vegebul shippers were, and how crazy the Gochi shippers were, and it was like some huge thing going on just over the hills. It’s the same idea, since the idea that you could like both or neither never seems to occur to anyone involved. I never gave a shit, because I used to see the same dumb agendas in the Harry Potter fandom.

Okay, so let me take you back. It’s 2005 through 2011, and I’m hateblogging all seven Harry Potter novels, because fuck you, that’s why. The funny thing I encountered was that occasionally fans seemed to want to pretend like my bashing of certain characters was proving them right somehow. They were like “See? He hates Ron Weasley too! That proves that Seamus Finnegan is the coolest guy ever.” The Slytherin stans would do this all the time, because I would constantly take the piss out of the Gryffindor characters for being self-important dopes. I think they just liked hearing it from an outside perspective. But I had to keep reminding them all that I hated all of them. Every character from Harry Potter sucks ass. Voldemort was my favorite, but only because he was the one guy who wanted to kill all of the others. But he sucks too because he failed.

And the shippers were the same way. I’d say something shitty about Ron, because Ron sucks, and some smartass Joss Whedon fan would be like “Yes! Boost the signal! That is why Harry/Hermione is the best ship!” And I’d be like “No, Harry and Hermione suck at least as bad as Ron does. They’re all terrible and I hate them.” I really do think there was some sort of Stockholm Syndrome going on with Harry Potter books, where everyone secretly knows they suck, but the fans sort of latch on to one or two characters and go like “Well, he’s not as shitty as the rest.” Like finding spaghetti in the trash and picking out the meatball with the least amount of lint on it. Then you’d go and start a flamewar with some other starving person over whether your meatball is shittier than theirs. This is what people mean when they say to read another book.

Anyway, the big thing I picked up from Sarah Z’s video is “disinterpretation”, a term coined by MSNBC columnis Zeeshan Aleem. The Twitter thread is worth a read, but the short version is that he once remarked that a Julia Louis-Dreyfus routine wasn’t very good, and someone got mad at him for insinuating that women are incapable of being funny. They just took his dissatisfaction with one performance by one comedian as being a universal condemnation of women comedians in general. And this sort of thing is all over the internet. Everyone sees what they want to see and then they take it as permission to overreact.

I ran into this myself a while back, because someone saw who I interacted with on Twitter and decided that they’re all bad guys and if I have any interaction with them, then that makes me a bad guy too. At the time I tried to play it cool, but the more I think about it, the more it ticks me off. And over the course of that conversation, it was said that I don’t talk about myself much, and that’s kind of funny, because all I ever do on social media is write long-ass blog posts like this one. I don’t expect anyone to memorize them, or even read them all the way through, but when I write all this stuff and someone goes out of their way to say they don’t know anything about me, the message is that they just didn’t pay attention to what I was saying, and they didn’t bother to try.

So I’m a little jaded from that, because I got called out for a bunch of stuff I didn’t even do or say, and apparently that’s just a thing that happens. People will reject you for completely arbitrary reasons, not because of anything you actually said or did, and you’re left thinking you made some terrible mistake. Except, no, I’ve seen it happen to other people, people a lore more conscientious than I am, and if they can’t satisfy the bullshit purity standards, then I never stood a chance. If the game is rigged so I can’t win, then I’m not going to play.

And it’s that same condition that probably draws people into these online holy wars, because if you declare yourself for the pro or anti side, at least then you’ll have a posse backing you up. Only they don’t support you, they support your willingness to support them. Once your commitment to their agenda wavers, even in the slightest, they will turn against you.

Sarah Z suggests that both sides of the war drop the pro and anti terms, since they lost all meaning long ago. But that just invites a new set of useless terms to perpetuate the same cycle. Her more useful advice is for fandom people to broaden their horizons. She got a lot of flak for tweeting “Go outside” once, but the ironic thing is that it’s sound advice. I had lunch with my mom yesterday and it was just nice getting away from things for a while. People need to do that more often, and unfortunately it feels like it’s harder to do than ever before.

But “go outside” isn’t just a literal thing. It can mean going beyond your usual haunts, reading the same books, watching the same shows, rehashing the same conversations. I think the reason this stuff always revolves around “shipping” is because there seems to be this deep-seated compulsion to pair fictional characters off like this, and for a lot of folks it’s the only way they can consume a story, so they do. And they do it lot, and there’s a lot of them, and they do it the same way every time, and lo and behold the same old conflicts start up. So maybe “go outside” should mean “go outside of that cycle once in a while.” Just a thought.

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seekmywayout · 5 years

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read you like a book

Koi wo Shiranai Bokutachi wa Ikezawa Mizuho/Aihara Eiji

Word Count: 1,579

He’s late again, she thinks to herself as her gaze unconsciously moves towards the library door. She’s lost count of how many times her eyes have flitted away from her responsibilities and towards the entrance instead; half expecting, half hoping to see a familiar face.

She doesn’t want to say, but she wants to see him.

Even if it’s for only a short while, she wants to see him.

As if on cue, the door slides open.

She tries to look nonchalant.

“You’re late,” she says matter-of-factly as he strides across the room, his backpack casually slung over his shoulder. He sets it on the ground in the corner of the room before approaching her. She continues, “And I was thinking you were getting better at being more punctual.”

“Oh, but I am getting better,” he replies. “I hate to admit it, but ‘library duty’ is getting ingrained in my mind now.”

She raises a single brow. “Yet you were still late.”

“Okay, I was already on my way home but something felt a little off, like I was forgetting something,” he explains to her. He stops himself for a second.

“Thought I left something behind for a moment, but then I remembered the library committee. And then I remembered you were also glaring at me earlier today.” He fakes a shudder. “So it must’ve been library duty.”

She feels her cheeks flush. “I was not glaring.”

But she can’t deny that maybe she did steal a glance or two at him during class.

“Well, even if I’m a little late, at least I’m here now,” he proclaims. “So, what’re we doing today?”

“I’ve been working on putting away the shipment of new books,” she states, pointing at her cart of books. She gestures towards another cart next to hers. “This is the ‘Return’ pile. Would you?”

He rolls up his sleeves and starts thumbing over book spines. “Sure, sure.”

They fall into a surprisingly comfortable silence as they begin their work. She puts away several non-fiction books, making a mental note in her mind of the ones that seemed useful. A first peek into new arrivals was the primary benefit of library duty, really. She suspects he may feel similarly.

It’s a comfortable silence, yet she unabashedly wants more.

“I was reading Duma Key the other day,” she brings herself to say, gaze moving towards him.

He looks up at her, prompted by the sound of her voice, and she sees his eyes light up. “For real? You? The one by Stephen King?”

She lets out a quiet huff in response. “Yes, the one by Stephen King. I thought I would give it a try. It is… different from a lot of the other novels I’ve read, but it’s good. Terrifying, yet gripping.”

“Right? He really is the king of suspense,” he concurs. “So hard to put one of his books down once you start.”

She finds herself nodding in agreement. “I stayed up longer than I was planning to last night because of it.”

He laughs then, and she tries not to let the sound distract her too much from their conversation. “His writing does that to you. Ah, yeah, Ikezawa—kind of related, I mentioned to you before that I read A Tale of Two Cities recently, right?”

Suddenly, she feels warm. “Yes, you did.”

“Uh, since classic literature is more your thing, I was wondering if you had any recommendations for something similar?” he asks. His right hand moves to scratch the back of his neck. “I mean, it’s usually not what I read but A Tale of Two Cities was actually pretty good. Maybe there’s more out there that I’m missing.”

She doesn’t disagree with that sentiment—it’s part of the reason why she chose to read Duma Key herself. She doesn’t necessarily want to say the other part.

With his request in mind, she brings a hand to her chin and takes a moment to ponder.

“Maybe Great Expectations or Bleak House. They are both also written by Charles Dickens. Crime and Punishment might be another one you’ll like. The author is…” She pauses. “I’ve forgotten his name; it was something Russian.”

“Oh,” he hums. “Crime and Punishment sounds interesting.”

“Ah, it’s a really fascinating character study that pulls you deep into the mind of the main character. I actually saw it earlier in the ‘Return’ pile if you’re interested in it.” She points towards his trolley of books.

“Yeah, it sounds like it’d be a good read,” he readily agrees, his attention turning to the stack of books.

As he says those words, she reaches forwards, trying to help him find the novel. She notices his own hands moving through the pile, so close to hers.

What if, she thinks, our hands touched?

It will be something straight out of a shoujo manga, she supposes. Not that she’s read many, but the few she’s flipped through at the recommendation of her classmates had similar such scenes.

Fingers touching, cheeks flushed, stolen glances…

Then they would sneak a whispered kiss, hidden away behind bookshelves, away from the prying eyes of fellow library committee members.

It would be their secret—soft and sweet and heart-wrenching.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asks suddenly, face turned towards her.

His voice breaks her out of her thoughts and she’s nothing short of scandalized at how overactive her imagination has become.

She clears her throat and attempts to sound unperturbed as she answers, “Yes, I’m fine.”

I’m not fine.

He cocks an eyebrow at her and she tries not to think too much about the genuine concern that crosses his features, or how their fingers never actually touched. She quietly wishes they had. “You sure? You just kinda froze for a bit; had a funny look on your face, to be honest.”

“That’s just my face,” she instinctively snaps. He startles slightly and she bites her tongue. He has no ill intent, she knows.

“Yes, I’m sure; I’m fine,” she says again, consciously changing her tone. “But thank you for your concern, Aihara.”

I’m not fine, not normal. Not when he looks at her like that. Not when her heart beats so fast there’s no way that it’s natural. Not when her mind drifts so easily towards thoughts of him, of him and her.

“Well, anyway, I found the book.” He holds it up to show her and starts leafing through the pages. “Thanks for the recommendation!”

She watches as he flips to the beginning of the novel and skims through the text. He mouths the words to himself silently as he reads; she especially likes the way his teeth catch on his lower lip as he does so.

“Solid start,” he says eventually, before closing the book and setting it aside. “Thanks a ton, Ikezawa.”

He looks up then, and their eyes meet. She abruptly turns her head away.

I was staring at him again, she realizes. But it’s hard not to.

“... I hope you’ll enjoy it,” she responds, her voice softer than she intended it to be. He gives her a crooked smile in return and looks back towards the mountain of books that still need to be sorted. Quietly, she follows suit.

It’s hard not to stare when he gives her those smiles.

It’s hard not to stare when she doesn’t know what to do with the rapid beating of her heart.

It’s hard not to stare when she wants him to look at her too.

And maybe he’s not suited for love after all, as he says, but she’ll wait. She’ll wait because not too long ago, she wasn’t either. Now, she lets the feeling slowly bloom in her chest, cherishes the warmth that spreads throughout her body at the sight of him, and the bursts of happiness that erupt whenever he smiles in her direction.

But, she doesn’t know what to do or how to act around him.

She hasn’t felt this confused about something since she first read Ulysses and found herself grappling against the literary behemoth.

If only she could read him like a book, she thinks. Sometimes, she feels like she still hasn’t got past the cover.

She wonders instead if she is easy to read—if her face betrays every emotion, spoils every hidden plot twist within her heart.

She wonders how her story will unfold.

“You know, Aihara,” she speaks up, “there’s another story that I’m interested in.”

They both look up at each other while their hands continue to fumble through their book sorting duty.

“Oh yeah? What is it?” he asks, sincerely.

It’s cute. She finds herself inwardly cursing her small crush on Hugh Jackman.

“Is it another Charles Dickens?” he guesses.

She shakes her head. “No, this story hasn’t started yet.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” he questions with a slight tilt of his head.

She feels an uncharacteristically soft, girlish giggle bubble to her lips. “I’ll tell you, but not today. Some other day.”

He crosses his arms to his chest and a contemplative frown forms on his lips. It’s quiet for a moment as she watches him, wondering what he’ll say to her, then he flashes her a lopsided grin. “Okay. I’ll hold you to that, Ikezawa.”

“And I’ll let you,” she says without missing a beat.

He blinks.

Then, he beams, “I’m looking forward to it!”

She finds herself smiling back naturally, because—

It will be the beginning of their story.

a/n:

set in an AU where I can be happy. I didn’t think too much about timelines but it’d probably fit somewhere before her confession ig

this fic is for all the Ikezawa fans out there, all 5 of us. Also I wish I could’ve written them in like… an actual relationship but that’s legitimately not my writing style for the most part lol. Maybe I could try again another time.

...I actually have not read a single book I mentioned in this story LOL

also I may end up posting this to ao3 later and de-anon myself but w/e, it’s nothing i haven’t done before tbh.

#fanfic #koi wo shiranai bokutachi wa #we don't know love yet #y'all can't stop me from making book allusions!!!!#word vomit #oof my blog layout on desktop is not good for chunks of text #i don't often write stuff because i wish canon was different #but here i am #doing that now #cope writing is a real thing lol

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1dcraftawards · 5 years

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MARCH AOM

Hello everyone! It is time to reveal who our author of the month is! They will be revealed below along with an interview we conducted with them! Hope you enjoy x

-1D Craft Awards Team

And our March Author of the Month is.....

@marisa-writes!!!

Questions:

1. Did you start writing fanfiction for One Direction, or was there another fandom that you wrote fanfiction for before this?

Before I found my way to One Direction fanfiction, I wrote Jonas Brothers fanfiction for a few years and I loved it immensely! I wouldn’t still be writing fic to this day if not for the relationships I built in that fandom, and the love I received both from my readers and my writing friends. I’ve been sharing my writing online for about ten years now, which is crazy to me. It was my connection to people I met through JBFA that led me to eventually make my way to 1DFF, though I was a very casual reader and not a writer in the beginning. I was also a casual fan of 1D at the time, definitely into their music but not planning to dive in much beyond that. Oh, how the tables have turned...

2. How old were you when you started writing fanfiction?

In 6th grade, my friends and I used to share the joy of writing this fake gossip column between us in which we were the members of this epic girl band. We would write about all of our exploits in the band and in our fictional personal lives, where we were - obviously - dating famous people, like members of ‘N Sync and the Backstreet Boys. In 7th grade, I wrote pages and pages of stories on loose-leaf paper about myself and my friends and threw in my celebrity crush of the moment as a love interest, so I suppose those stories were my first attempts at writing fanfiction.

This was in the early 2000s, so I didn’t really know my way around finding fanfics on the internet until a couple of years later, but aside from these self-insert stories, the first piece of fanfiction I remember writing with original characters was a Justin Timberlake one I wrote during my freshman year of high school. I kept it in a spiral that I decorated with pictures of Justin and my “face claim” - before face claims had a name - for my original character, Jamie (to show my age, her face claim was Samantha Mumba). I still have that notebook and know exactly where it is. I pull it out every once in a while to remind myself of the journey my writing has taken, because WOW, was that story bad! But I’d never be where I am if I hadn’t written it!

3. What’s been your favorite fic you’ve written to work on so far?

What a terrible question. Asking me to choose between my stories is a lot like asking me to choose between my non-existent children!

I have thoroughly enjoyed writing all of the projects I’ve shared so far, but the summer that I wrote the sangria series was like magic. Teyana and Niall came out of a couple days’ worth of me listening to one of my favorite R&B artists, Jon B., on repeat, and after one lengthy one-shot in which I’d put a lot of thought into their back-story as well as the one I was telling in that particular piece, I was a goner for them. While writing that series, I was an endless well of inspiration and I enjoyed creating those characters and spending so much time in their world.

The Different Strokes series has been the gift that keeps on giving for a few years now, and the joy that’s come from showcasing Liam and Georgia’s love for one another as their family grows has pleased me immensely.

I also feel very similarly about one of my one-shots, goodnight, good morning. Creatively, it was just an absolute joy to write and I can’t help but regard it with fondness whenever I think about it. It came out of left field for me, but my love of the stuck-in-the-elevator trope combined with my love of Liam in nice winter coats made for a piece of writing I am super proud to say I’ve written.

4. Is there a fic that you really wanted to write, but you just never did?

I have a plethora of barely-started fics that just sit taunting me in my Google Docs. The two that haunt me the most are Basketball Jones, an AU in which Liam is a point guard playing on the same university team as my OFC Tionne’s twin brother, Amari, and Roots, in which newly-solo Liam is stoked when presented with the opportunity to work with a legendary soul artist named Maurice Collins to complete his album, but the project ends up getting passed off to Maurice’s daughter Cleo instead. Both stories are the kind you wish would write themselves because you just want them to be out there in the world, you know? But alas, I suppose I have to do the work myself, and I just haven’t been able to get either project to take off just yet.

5. What’s your favorite trope to write?

ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS! God, I’m such a sucker for it. I know a lot of people are fans of the build-up and all the angst and heartache and reconciliation that comes with it, but I’m always the one at the end going, “So what’s next?” I love to see what happens past the happy (or sometimes, not-so-happy) ending. There is so much to be told in what happens between a pairing when they’re committed and figuring out how to be together, and I adore being able to showcase that, especially because it’s not something you see as often as other tropes in fic.

6. What’s your ideal space to write in?

I like writing in my room. It’s quiet, peaceful, my own space. Sometimes I’ll sit on my bed; other times, I like to kick back in my chair in the corner where my lights are hung - my little reading/writing/tv-watching nook - and I’ll prop my feet up on my ottoman and do some writing with a nice cup of tea. I like to be as relaxed as possible, so I can really let my mind wade through all the lines of dialogue and scenes that I want to write.

7. What inspires you to write?

All sorts of things. For many years, it was music. I used to require music playing when I wrote, but I write in silence more often than not now. Still, music is a heavy inspiration for me - there are stories to find even in the songs that don’t seem like, lyrically, they’d provide any. But the mind is a powerful thing, and so is music, and when the two work together, magic tends to happen.

I also find inspiration in the world around me, and in the things I read. I’m a big fan of studying how people interact with one another. Relationships - familial, platonic, or romantic - are fascinating to me, and I love to write about how people react to the others around them, or the environment around them. I believe certain people and places come into your life exactly when they’re meant to for reasons you may or may not understand at the time, but they’re always important in your journey, and I love to write about that.

As a black woman, having the opportunity to continuously write about black women is also a huge inspiration for me, which is something you’ll notice in looking at the original female characters I write. One of my favorite authors, Alyssa Cole, is a black woman who has written both historical and contemporary romances, and she floors me with every piece of hers that I read because the diversity she includes in every story is encompassing and feels effortless. She paints a picture of what our diverse world looks like or has looked like in the past with every novel or novella she writes, and she inspires me to use my words to share stories that feature black women of all shapes, sizes, and backgrounds at the center because it’s important to me to see incredible black women having their stories told. Alyssa’s diversity doesn’t stop at just black characters, either, which is even more marvelous to me. She’s a force to be reckoned with, and I always joke that I want to be her when I grow up, but let’s be real, I’m not joking.

8. Do you typically like to listen to music when you write? If so, what do you listen to?

I inadvertently just answered this question! Back in my must-listen-to-music days, I would put Jason Reeves’ The Magnificent Adventures of Heartache (And Other Frightening Tales…) on repeat. That album in itself tells a story from start to finish of falling in love, being in love, getting your heart broken, and starting over, and there was something in the magic of Jason’s lyrics and musicality that used to wring endless sparks of inspiration from me. Whenever I felt stuck, I would turn that album on and the words would flow. Nowadays, I tend to find comfort in the quiet, but if a particular song or collection of songs has inspired something I’ve written, like Jon B. did with sangria on your lips, or SoMo’s “For You” did with the one-shot of the same name, I’ll listen to whatever’s inspiring me on repeat.

9. Do you have any plans for any future fic ideas you’d like to pursue?

Nothing confirmed at the moment! If I could get those fics I have haunting me in my Google Docs to wander past small blurbs and vague plot ideas, that’d be wonderful. I’ll write fanfiction in this fandom as long as I’m inspired.

10. Do you have any advice for other writers in the fandom?

WRITE. FOR. YOU. Look at that again, read it over and over until it’s ingrained deep in your mind and heart. Don’t write with the goal in mind to gain ‘x’ number of readers, and don’t write to measure up to anyone else. We as writers are our own worst critics and conspiracy theorists, and we will come up with a hundred different reasons to stop writing when we’re discouraged or frustrated, or compare ourselves to others and consider them leagues above us. It is so easy to talk ourselves in circles of why we should quit because of whatever reasons we’ve decided on in that precise moment, but you know what? If you write, you started for a reason. It gave you feelings you’d never experienced before and wanted to chase so hard that they drove you to write something that came from your mind, your heart, your fingertips. Do you realize how extraordinary that is?

Nothing you write will ever mean much if you don’t write it for you. You can’t love to do this and pour your heart into your words if they aren’t ones that mean something to you. You are never going to please everyone that reads your writing, which is often a hard truth to swallow because we just want to be liked, and you will be by some! But it’s important that you write something you’ll be proud to attach your name to, because someone is going to be very pleased with it, but most importantly, you will be pleased with it. We grow and change as writers and so does our level of work, but looking back and cringing because maturity has made us better writers is not the same as looking back and cringing because what we wrote doesn’t reflect who we’ve been at any stage. Write to satisfy yourself at whatever place in life you’re in. No regrets when you look back.

11. What is your writing process like?

It very much depends on the project! One-shots are my bread and butter, and those are often things I can write in a breeze when I’m inspired. My one-shots are usually the lengthy type, more of a short-story packed into a smaller package, so writing them tends to go smoothest for me.

For my chaptered projects, or the ones that started as one-shots and turned into stories or series, it’s a slower process for me. I always have a general plot line and specific important moments in mind, but I’m not the outlining type at all - feels too stifling for me, and I like the freedom to adjust certain plot points when the process serves. If I’m full of inspiration and my life allows me the freedom to sit down and write away, I will! I’ve recently moved myself out of a life situation that was taking a lot of that creativity and peace of mind away from me, and I’m hoping to find my way back to some sort of constant stream of inspiration soon.

Author Specific:

1. Why would you say you’re more attuned to writing Liam and Niall out of all the boys? Would you ever write for Harry / Louis / Zayn?

Liam is the whole reason I wound up in this lovely mess. I became a fan of 1D’s music from the first album, but genuinely had no intention of going beyond that in terms of interest. I’d recently exited the Jonas Brothers fandom as a whole because the cattiness and pettiness of some fans was absolutely exhausting and I needed a break from fandom for a good while (or so I thought, as I eventually found myself neck-deep in the Big Time Rush fandom). Around 2013, though, Liam’s vocals, smile, and stage presence had me slowly turning into the eye emoji. And those who have known me for quite a while can probably recall the night in 2015 where I drank a lot of wine and looked at a lot of pictures of him on Tumblr and became a complete goner.

It took me a little bit to start writing about him, however. I’d been reading some 1D fic because a dear friend I’d met through JBFA had moved to writing 1D fic and I once told her I’d read Magic School Bus fanfiction if she wrote it, so I obviously followed her to 1DFF. As I became more interested in Liam, I started reading some Liam fics, trying to get a hang on his personality because at the time I wrote mainly OU and I love finding that authenticity. I also wanted to get a feel for writing characters who weren’t American, like I am. Eventually, I came up with some ideas, decided to get my feet wet, and started writing. I would say I’m attuned to writing Liam because in learning about him, I connected with him. I adore him as a person and an artist, and hardly anyone writes about him these days (which breaks my heart), so I continue to because he makes me happy and we could all use a little more Liam-centric stories in our lives.

As for Niall, I was blown away by the leaps and bounds of the growth of his vocal talent on Made in the A.M. He really shined on those songs for me, and when his solo career started rolling, I was mesmerized by the way he was going about it. Very deliberate with his choices, taking his time, warming everyone up to the magic he’d been possessing for years. I was floored by his magnetism both as a person and an artist, and it drew me to write about him. While it was completely unexpected because I’d been gone for Liam for quite some time, I don’t regret a single minute of it.

I would absolutely write for Harry, Zayn, or Louis if a story idea struck me. I actually started a Harry story that I stalled with big time because I scared myself out of confidence with the massiveness of writing a story with supernatural elements, but hey, maybe someday!

2. What is one moment from “Regarding Our Ghosts” that you never got to write but want to?

ROG, my OG baby! I’m unbelievably heartbroken that I haven’t been able to finish that fic, because it was a passion project, but it always holds such a solid place in my heart.

In the story, Liam and Lissie were meant to travel home to the UK to visit family for the winter holidays, while Nina and Macy went to see her mother, Noreen, for a few days around Christmas. Over the course of their time apart, I wanted to show how integrated their lives had started to become, with Lissie insisting that she and Liam buy presents for Macy and Nina to give when they returned, and Noreen inquiring after the father-and-daughter pair that Macy couldn’t stop talking about during their visit.

Once Liam returned, he was to drop by Nina’s to catch up with her and see if she needed some help with shoveling snow from the drive. There was a moment in which they laughed and joked and Liam’s laughter made Nina realize how much she’d missed him and it absolutely terrified her because she didn’t have the capacity to put a name to that feeling just yet. There’s a little snippet I wrote on an index card at the place where I used to tutor because it struck me mid-lesson, and I carried that index card in my wallet for years. It went:

He laughs, and oh—oh. His laugh. She missed his laugh. She missed this. She missed Liam.

The feeling settles low in the pit of her stomach, goopy and sweet, and she doesn’t know what to make of it. In her mind, there are little compartments where she sorts out her thoughts and emotions, and as she tries to sort this—that she missed Liam—she can’t. She doesn’t know where to put it.

So she lets it churn in her gut, thickening like a rue, until she can make up her mind.

It was such an important moment for them - a turning point, for Nina at least, realizing that this man she and her daughter had come to rely on in certain ways could be more than just a friend to her. That her feelings could be stronger, and she could maybe feel something for someone again after convincing herself she’d be happy alone if that’s what was meant for her.

Man, I miss that story something fierce, but it stays with me every day.

3. What is one thing you wish you would’ve known before you started writing 1d fic?

That I would get in this deep. Ha. No, honestly, I’m glad that I didn’t have any expectations going in. That’s the best. You learn as you go. Similar to my time writing Jonas Brothers fic, I’ve built some pretty great friendships that I never would have if I hadn’t started writing 1D fic. I even made connections with people who read my Jonas Brothers fanfics but we’d never spoken until I started reading and writing 1D fic!

I’m grateful for the people this has brought into my life, and the opportunity I’ve had to go into this fandom and spend more time honing my craft and getting to shine a light on people of color in my stories, black women specifically. We are so often missing from fiction and that is true from the fanfiction world to the romance novels I read, but our stories are so important and real and as needed as everyone else’s, so I am excited beyond belief that I’ve been able to create several black female characters that have reached out and touched readers of all kinds. I’ve also been able to connect to other authors of color who, like me, write about people who look and think and live like them, and the sense of being seen as a person of color is overwhelming. I hope to see more of it in the future.

4. Who has been your favorite OFC to write? Why?

I’m gonna cheat a bit here because it’s a three-way toss-up between Georgia, Rolly, and Teyana.

Georgia means the world to me because in my previous fandom, I wrote a lot of white OFCs because that was just...what I saw and experienced, and to be honest, I didn’t really think about it much at first. Writing white characters was the “norm”. After a while, I noticed that in seeking out characters who looked like me, I encountered a lot of storylines that featured racism as a conflict between x Jonas Brother’s family and the OFC. It was hard to find stories in which characters were just human beings who happened to be black and faced conflict that had nothing to do with their race. So, I decided to write a story in which that was the case. It opened up my eyes to what I’d been failing to focus on, something that became super important to me the more I reflected on it: seeing black characters represented realistically and in a positive light in fanfiction.

When I eventually came to write 1D fic, I made a very conscious choice to feature black women at the center of my stories, and Georgia was the first. Through her, I was able to show a successful black woman who had started a family with the man she loved, and I was able to showcase little moments of Georgia’s experiences as a black woman that Liam had to learn about, like why she wrapped her hair at night. It sounds like such a small thing, but that was big for me - I couldn’t recall ever seeing that in the writing I’d read thus far, a black woman wrapping her hair at night, so I wrote it. Soon, I had readers coming to me who could relate and said they hadn’t seen it, either. I’ve also had non-black readers who have expressed how much they like the fact that I write about black women, that they enjoy reading stories that focus on people of color. The whole experience has been so moving for me. It’s made me realize that I am not only doing something I love, but also doing something important.

Rolly Marshall is, in many ways, a reflection of me. I conjured her up when I was a few months into my first year of teaching and overwhelmed, tired, and frustrated beyond belief. She was an escape. I could channel all of the things I loved and dreaded about my job into her and her life, and it was like lifting a weight off my shoulders. Rolly loves her job, like I did, but her experience was one that I created to be more positive than the one I experienced, which has made it both easy and hard to write about her at times. But more than our mutual connection through education, I love Rolly because she feels so genuine to me. She’s awkward and kind-hearted and funny and a good friend to the people in her life. She’s just a good egg. I love her spirit and her humor and that’s a big part of what’s made her such a joy to write. I didn’t expect many people to latch on to her because how many people could really relate to a second grade teacher? To my great surprise, many.

Teyana surprised me with my attachment to her. She and Niall were meant to be a one-time thing, much like Liam and Georgia, but seeing as how those two turned into an eighteen-part thing PLUS a throwback mini-fic, I should’ve known better. It was while I was writing sangria on your lips that I found myself thinking about who Teyana was before she and Niall met. I couldn’t stop thinking about where she came from, building her past. She comes from a single parent home where her father raised her after her mom left. She carries scars from that, from the abandonment she felt when her mom moved on without so much as a single moment to look back. She clung to her Papi and his Cuban culture and grew up with the lessons he instilled in her, including one she taught herself from watching his heart break: that maybe there was no great “one” for her. But that changes when she meets Niall, who challenges everything she thought she could gain from a relationship. He’s truly a partner to her. He has a glimpse into what life is like when your parents aren’t together anymore, so he’s empathetic to what she feels in regards to her mom. He loves her unconditionally. He’s her match, and after years of convincing herself she may never find her match and she’ll be okay with that, Niall is a pleasant surprise, and honestly, he restores her faith in love. She learns she doesn’t need anyone else to make her life complete - her Papi raised her to find that completion all on her own - but having someone to share her life with is a pleasure she’s more than grateful to have.

5. Which one of your fic boys was your favorite to write? Why?

Different Strokes Liam has been my all-time favorite. He’s driven and passionate about his work, completely committed to his family, and there’s a warmth, humor, and sexiness to him that has made him so much fun to write since I began. I love that I can paint him as a complete and utter sop in one piece, a classic romantic in another, and a confident master of seduction in the next. He’s confident and often sure of himself but not immune to insecurities. He’s got different facets, and I love getting to focus on each one at different times as the series shifts.

The Different Strokes series was something that spawned from what was supposed to be a stand-alone one-shot, but I found myself attached to the little family I built for Liam, Georgia, and their son Carter, and my mind expanded upon writing little snippets of them - glimpses of them as Carter grew, as their lives changed, as their family expanded. I am a big fan of established relationships, and I grew so attached to watching Liam mature and change as both a father and a husband. Liam in real life seems to have such a compassionate heart, and before he even became a father, I had a good feeling that he would be a great one and getting to write about him as both a father to his children and a partner to his wife has been such a joy. And with Checkpoints, my mini-fic in the series, I’ve been able to go back to when he and Georgia first met and began seeing each other and it’s been nothing but fun to write!

If not for DS Liam, I wouldn’t have fallen as in love with writing 1D fic as I have, so I am grateful every day for the opportunity I’ve had to expand upon his character and the incredible life he’s built for himself. Writing him has led to writing many other projects that I adore, and I can’t wait to see what’s next for me as a writer.

#aom #march aom #1dcraftawards #1dff

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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In First Become Ashes, K.M. Szpara Makes Us Wonder if Magic is Real

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

K.M. Szpara‘s debut Docile was one of the most binge-able, divisive reads of 2020. A near-future drama set in a world in debt crisis (imagine that), Docile explores the violence of capitalism at the most intimate of interpersonal levels, as we follow Elisha as he sells himself to trillionaire Alex in order to pay off his family’s debts. With Docile, Szpara, a queer and trans Baltimore-based author, proved himself willing to dive into some complex, culturally loaded subjects to tell a science fiction story that reflects some central yet ignored truths about our contemporary society. For me, a White reader, the ways in which Docile works outweigh it doesn’t (one major criticism: the book’s avoidance of addressing America’s real-life history of slavery), but this will be different for every reader.

In his second book, First, Becomes Ashes (out today!), Szpara is similarly ambitious in topic and theme. Ashes is a standalone novel that takes place in the aftermath of the destruction of a maybe-magical cult, following four different characters caught up in the messy repercussions of the FBI’s raiding of the Fellowship of the Anointed. Much of the novel’s early perspective comes from Lark, an almost 25-year-old who believes wholeheartedly in the teachings of cult leader Nova, and that he has been chosen to learn magic and martial arts in order to hunt the monsters that ravage the world outside the Fellowship gates. Like Docile, it’s a startlingly unique premise. Despite having four separate POV characters, Ashes is able to maintain a mystery around some of the fundamental truths of this world, leaving the reader to wonder if magic exists in this world or not.

Den of Geek: Where did the inspiration for the book that would become First, Become Ashes begin?

K.M. Szpara: The idea hit me like a comeback three hours too late! I’ve always been interested in cults and faith and belonging. As a speculative fiction author, I had to give it a fantasy twist. Magic is something many of us have wished for since childhood. What if it was real—and then what if we were told it wasn’t?

This book has several POV characters, but you very much begin with Lark’s POV. Can you talk about how you went about deciding who would be POV characters and how you came up with the pacing for expanding the perspective-scope of this story?

One of my favorite ways to create tension is to show how different people experience the same event(s). Ashes shows dissolution of a cult from four points of view. Two “privileged” members who are Anointed—one a believer and one a doubter. One member who is a Fellow, a regular layperson. One outsider who has dreamed of having the magic the Anointed claim. Each of these characters experienced life differently before and after the Fellowship’s dissolution and they’re all tied together in deeply personal emotional ways. The pacing really comes down to knowing how to choose each chapter’s POV. And for me, it’s which character will be most effected by an event. For example, Lark performs healing magic on himself in front of Calvin. Though Lark is the one being healed and performing magic, it’s Calvin who’s seeing magic up close for the first time. It’s Calvin who’s wanted magic his whole life and is inches from it. That’s what drives the story forward.

Something you do in both Docile and Ashes that I love is give us a POV character who is an outsider to a world the reader will most likely recognize and then offer Nacirema-esque observation from that protagonist-outsider. Is this something you do intentionally? Why are you interested in telling stories in this way?

I had not heard of Nacirema until this question, but I love this observation! For anyone else hearing this for the first time, a cursory Google tells me that the term Nacirema is “American” spelled backwards and is a term used in sociology and anthropology to show distance while studying people in the United States of America. (I’m not a social scientist—amateur Googler over here!) I use outsider characters in this way because I want readers to see how aspects of their lives mirror the characters’ lives, how our society mirrors these harmful fictional societies. It’s easy to read about a cult and think you would never be drawn in, but that happens to people like you and me—and there are aspects of the U.S. that are cultish but not named in that way. I want people to see how they have been drawn in, how hard it is to unlearn and escape that harm. Because sometimes it looks and feels like magic and that’s all you’ve ever wanted.

I love all of the fandom explanation and outsider observation in this book. Why did you want to have a fan character like Calvin as such a central part of this story, and how did you want to depict fandom more generally?

When I think about who would be deeply invested in magic being real, it’s people like me who grew up reading SFF, wishing I’d walk through a portal to another world—even though the stories that took place in them were full of danger. There was magic! I’ve joked with friends that if one of them texted to tell me a real wizard or vampire or werewolf was in their house, I would absolutely drop everything and go to them. I want to see! I want to lift the veil! That’s what Lilian does when her BFF Calvin texts that an Anointed member of the Fellowship is in their hotel room.

But that doesn’t mean Calvin’s motivations are pure and good—nor are they malicious! Like fandom, he’s imperfect. He wants magic and monsters to be real so badly that he’s sometimes willing to hurt others in pursuit of his dreams. Though Calvin doesn’t represent fandom as a whole—what one person could?—I did want to show someone who’s helpful and harmful, family-friendly and sexy, successful and unfulfilled. Complicated, like most of us and our interests are!

A central tension of Ashes is the mystery of if Lark’s magic is real, which creates this experience as a reader of not totally understanding as you’re reading what genre the book itself even is—is it speculative fiction or is it something else? It was a really unique reading experience, and led me to wonder as I was reading if and why I cared about classifying it. What a cool use of the “unreliable” narrator! Can you talk about creating and sustaining this tension/mystery and what you wanted to do with it?

It was difficult! Whether magic appears successful depends on the chapter’s POV character and its place within the arc. Sometimes a spell’s result is instant and sometimes it’s implied. Often faith is the difference. In that way we’re all unreliable narrators—everyone is only telling their own truth as they see it, as they’ve been raised and taught to see it. I wanted to keep readers wondering, not just for the thrill of “is magic real?” but why they’re asking. Who do they believe—who do they want to believe? Does it matter who’s “right”? Why? Read and answer for yourself! Ashes is a fantasy novel… if you want it to be.

Were the in-universe discussion of preferred pronouns always part of this story and the culture of the Fellowship?

Yes. Cults don’t exist because they seem unattractive and survivors often have at least some fond memories. I wanted to create a place that felt somewhat harmonious and fruitful, which included the ability to find and be yourself with full acceptance. Something I wish existed outside of my imaginary cult, as well!

Both Ashes and Docile depict experiences and topics that are very sensitive for many readers—i.e. abuse, rape, and sadomasochism—and that therefore most “mainstream” authors either shy away from completely or depict very superficially. Why are you interested in exploring these themes in your storytelling? What conclusions, if any, are you hoping for readers to come away with in relation to these themes specifically?

Firstly, no authors are required to deal with such heavy topics. I choose to; they’re common experiences and I’m not interested in glossing over them. I want to show how rape and abuse and conditioning affect people both in the moment and long after. And the sadomasochism in Ashes is not a depiction of a healthy S&M experience, but that’s not to imply that S&M is inherently unhealthy—because it absolutely can be! And lots of real people experiment with and engage in various forms of BDSM, sometimes healthy, sometimes not. I’m not writing guidebooks or after-school specials. My goal is not to portray perfect relationships or characters taking all the right steps. It is to show emotional truths. To portray how complicated and messy people are and reality is when it comes to traumatic situations.

It’s interesting to me that you use 25 as the coming-of-age age in this story. Can you talk about why you made that decision?

Ages like eighteen and twenty-one only mean something because we have decided they do. The Fellowship doesn’t operate by our rules, so I chose twenty-five, which felt like a natural milestone as a quarter century. Additionally, I wanted those leaving the Fellowship on their quests to be young adults (not in the publishing category sense) who were old enough to consider themselves competent but not so old that they’d had a lot of time as an adult to reflect on their experiences. A lot is ingrained in children and teenagers and I personally spent a lot of my early twenties both learning more and new information about myself and the world, but also unlearning some of the harmful aspects I’d absorbed from my younger years. It’s a time when many are figuring out their place in the world as independent adults, for the first time, not unlike the Anointed going out on their quests.

Are there things you especially learned in the writing and publishing of Docile that inspired how you wrote and edited this story?

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It was nice to edit a book having already done so once because the mystery was gone—but that didn’t make it any easier! Second books are their own brand of tricky—and I like to try new things with craft, to push myself, which is fun but also stressful. There is a feeling of both familiarity while writing a second book, and also fear that maybe you wrote that first book my accident somehow and will never be able to do it again. Luckily, I have an awesome team at Tordotcom Publishing and they saw me through it, again.

First, Become Ashes is now available to buy wherever books are sold, including via Tor.com.

Note: First, Become Ashes contains explicit sadomasochism and sexual content, as well as abuse and consent violations, including rape.

The post In First Become Ashes, K.M. Szpara Makes Us Wonder if Magic is Real appeared first on Den of Geek.

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#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

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bookandcover · 4 years

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[An important note: I wrote most of this post in July/August 2020.]

This has been a tumultuous and emotional year. But one good thing to come out of June 2020 was my whole family committing to do, together, an Anti-Racism Book Club. We take turns picking books by authors of color that we feel are important for us to read and discuss. The books can be light-hearted or serious, fiction or non-fiction, contemporary or historical—the important part is that they give my white family opportunities to regularly talk with each other about race.

I grew up in a liberally-minded white family and my parents, in the 90s, frequently said things like “I don’t see race” and “I believe in equality” (implying: so I don’t need to do anything else about it). And my parents did truly feel this way (without seeing why this mindset presented its own set of problems). They raised me to be kind and compassionate, to approach anyone as my equal (not greater, nor less), and to listen to others. But they also raised me in a lot of ignorance, and—especially after we moved to incredibly white rural Maine—race was a very limited part of our lives and discussions. My sister and I both changed and grew a lot during college and graduate school, confronting our ignorance and the racist assumptions and misunderstandings that grew out of this. Our conversations with our parents over the past decade have centered around bringing race, religion, culture, and sexuality/gender diversity back into our awareness and our lives. I appreciate so much how willing my parents are to talk and to think about these topics, even though we all have a lot of growing and learning to do.

In early June, an Anti-Racism Family Book Club seemed like one (small, but important) thing we needed to do. We all know that talking to each other doesn’t offer the same experience (that we all need more of) of hearing about and discussing directly the impacts and the complexities of racial discrimination, unequal education access, regular police violence, and criminal injustice with people of color in our lives. But, at the same time, I’ve found that conversations among white people about race are vital. We need to actively educate ourselves and each other. We cannot rely on others (asked to explain themselves and their trauma over and over again) to do this for us. In conversations about race with other white people, I’ve seen white people be shockingly open, and, in saying what they really think (their cruelest misconceptions and darkest assumptions), they’ve been able to root out these things and address them, dig out the thorniest examples of racism in their hearts and start to look at the world in a new way. Lots of liberally-minded white people are cautious to bring up the most harmful things in their hearts and minds in front of people who they might hurt, but then these things fester. In front of other white people, I’ve seen some of these things (and I’ve experienced this happening to myself, as well) get addressed and changed.

Born A Crime (my sister’s pick) was our June book, and we’ve also covered Just Mercy for July (now onto Richard Wright’s Black Boy for August). This was a great place to start in June because Trevor Noah brings levity and humor to issues of racial injustice and discrimination. Many serious conversations about race were happening—at our workplaces, in our communities, in our family—so I was glad that our discussion of Born A Crime could also feature race-centric experiences that include moments of humor and levity as well. As we discussed this book, we did talk a lot about humor when it’s used in a racially-charged space. Humor is, of course, inherently a tricky subject. Where “the line” is looks different for each person and many comedians intentionally walk this line, shocking and startling us, and sometimes crossing over into areas that make their audience uncomfortable. That being said, I really value humor in the context of any serious social issue. It helps us look at our selves in new ways. But where “the line” is, when it comes to racially-charged humor, takes a lot from who is telling the joke and who is the butt of it. While Noah is incredibly tactful at most turns, my family carefully dissected the story “Go Hitler!” which, unlike most of Noah’s social commentary blended with humor, included a social group to which he does not belong. As Noah described the terrible misunderstanding that occurred between his dance troupe with a skilled dancer named Hitler and the community at a Jewish school for young children, I felt he dealt with the misunderstanding in a powerful, self-aware way. My sister, whose fiancé is Jewish, felt more sensitive to this, raising concerns that Noah’s story was making a joke out of something that must have been a truly shocking experience for the young children who witnessed a group of older kids seemingly supporting (and openly celebrating) Hitler and what he stood for. It is poignant to see the misunderstanding between these two groups occur and the young boys of Noah’s dance group do not intend harm (but they cause it and no resolution occurs (in the space of the story) with them them figuring out and processing the miscommunication). Is this story walking a line when it’s told, years later, with tones of shock at a past limited viewpoint, but also with tones of comedy? I think there is no easy answer here.

Another space in which Noah finds comedy among tough topics is within the physicality of his relationship with his mother. The moments of humor, of absurdity here, of course, read quite differently than the “Go Hitler!” story, as Noah is capturing the particulars of his mother’s lived experience, as a Black woman with a Colored child in South Africa under Apartheid. The physicality of their relationship—normally, Noah’s mother not holding back from hitting and slapping him, punishing him physically for both small and large transgressions—takes center stage in several of the stories. Noah’s conviction that his mother’s brand of tough love is exactly that, love, shines through these stories as well. At no point does Noah understand her way of raising him with a firm hand to be anything other than merited by his behavior (at least, looking back on it). Noah mixes humor and levity into his stories that include sever punishment at his mother’s hands, and humor in these moments works because we perceive them to be equals. We don’t see their fights as abuse or disrespect, from either direction. (That being said, the reaction—judgmental, alarmed—I’d likely otherwise have to physical fighting between family members is definitely a mark of my privilege). Noah’s mother is whip smart. When he starts running, she starts running too. Their physical fighting somehow uplifts her, solidifies her, empowers her—she is in control (not of Noah, exactly, but of herself, of her choices and actions. When she lashes out, it’s not out of fear, but strength. It’s not out of panic or desperation, but out of certainty—a clarity of mind and purpose that lets her actively shape Noah more firmly than the world will shape him, and the world can be very firm she knows). And Noah credits her, over and over again, for molding him. From her choice to throw Noah, only a child, from a moving car and herself out afterward to escape a dangerous driver to her choice to jump in front of her abusive ex-husband, as he starts firing a gun at her and their children—we readers repeatedly see her vividness, her conviction, and her strength in Noah’s life.

I purchased a physical copy of the book (my normal preferred reading method), but my mom and sister listened to the audiobook through their Audible accounts. While I was home, I listened to several chapters of the book with my mom and it was wonderful to hear Trevor Noah reading his own stories aloud (with his distinctive comedic tone and timing). I found it helpful to both listen to and read the book because my knowledge of South American cultures, ethnicities, and languages is very limited. It helped me to both hear Trevor Noah pronouncing words and names in Afrikaans, Zulu, and Xhosa and to see these words written on the page. A hugely significant part of this whole novel was the historical context Noah provides for racial inequality in South Africa. His description of Apartheid, as an intentional organizational structure established to oppress people through the separation of racial and ethnic groups and the classification of peoples according to (at times) arbitrary physical characteristics, was eye-opening. I thought it was poignant to see the intentionally behind Apartheid, as a structure and governing framework. I think, frequently, of racial issues in the U.S. as growing out of a complex history and amalgamation of factors—economic, social, cultural, political. It’s alarming to see and to consider clear-minded intentionality behind racist structures, but seeing the designed nature of Apartheid, I was called to think about how many racist structures in U.S. are also very intentionally designed (our criminal justice system, healthcare system, education system, economic systems and taxation processes, voting rights and procedures, to name a few that are very relevant today, which doesn’t even consider heavily-designed oppression frameworks like Jim Crow laws and segregation). I’m not quite sure why this felt like a revelation to me, but the fact that it did felt poignant and troubling. Why was I inclined (trained, shaped, influenced) to see my country’s history as an unfortunate, perfect storm of many factors and not a heavy-handed, intentionally designed framework of racism just like that of Apartheid? I know why, of course. The subversiveness of systemic racism is that we’re taught, on every level, to accept it as “no one’s fault really,” but huge, ingrained, impossible to change, embedded into the very fabric of our lives. The fault is clear, though, and the influence huge. But, given that this is a chosen, designed framework...surely we can fight toward a different design.

Although, it feels daunting.

[Another note: I write these posts primarily for myself, to keep track of some of my feelings and thoughts about books I read. But I realize I’m also putting them online, which means others can see them and react to them. If you ever read something I wrote and want to talk to me about something, point out to me something I haven’t considered, correct me on something I am wrong about—an area of extra high probability when it comes to topics around race—I would like it if you felt okay about reaching out to me with a message. Thank you for considering it.]

#born a crime #trevor noah #good reads #antiracism #antiracism book club #talking about race #apartheid

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deehollowaywrites · 7 years

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A serendipitous confluence of events occurred over the past several days when one of my favorite television shows returned with an unexpected side character, the AWP writing conference took over downtown Tampa, and three Kentucky Derby preps ran, including a much-contested San Felipe Stakes.

If these seem disjointed, know that horses are always--shall we say--the glue of my spiritual landscape.

A few friends who also watch the soapy, sneakily feminist Lifetime twist-buffet UnREAL admitted that they didn’t want to spoil my delight at the inclusion of a jockey character, however briefly poor, much-maligned Norman was onscreen (I assume my Twitter reaction delivered). The show, which is a dramatized take on the Bachelor empire of reality TV, attempted to lampshade the ingrained humor of a petite man trying to win the affections of a statuesque woman by having all the characters involved remark on this apparent absurdity. Producers Rachel and Quinn, Everlasting’s star Serena, and Norman all know he’s being played for giggles. A few heated conversations and a drunken bathroom tryst later, Serena cuts Norman from her lineup of possible future husbands. Knowing the show, he might pop up again, but I was sorry to see only one episode devoted to exploring this particular corner of heteronormative masculinity.

“So you’re a jockey jumper, then?” asks the protagonist of Jason Beem’s racetracker novel Southbound. The narrative elaborates, noting that most of the women one might reasonably class as race-rider groupies are “at least five foot seven,” and then moves onto the more pressing topic of whether the woman in question, beautiful and popular paddock host Maria, might shift her interest to the horseplayer protagonist. Despite the novel centering around various racetracks, jockeys rarely show up; there are 44 instances of the word in a 400-page novel. When jockeys do appear, they’re at a distance, on horseback or in the saddling paddock, and seen through a specific, borderline-hostile lens: that of the horseplayer who mistrusts riders. Jockeys are there to be yelled at by spectators, to “stiff” bettors, to do anything other than their jobs, and most saliently, they’re “notoriously horny little creatures” who can be trusted neither to ride their horses honestly nor remain faithful to their partners. Simultaneously sexualized by their in-group and unsexed by external observers, (male) riders are shrouded in layers of marginalization. How is it possible for a rider to be trite joke fodder in one context and erotically imposing in another? In both the universes of UnREAL and Southbound, jockeys fuck women but they’re not meeting the parents--the difference lies in admission, in context required for comprehension.

“I’m an elite athlete!” Norman protests, standing on his five-five dignity, and later, as it seems Serena might be opening up to him, starts a spiel about how his profession is misunderstood. But Serena is intent on hiding their hook-up once she’s sober again, the show’s narrative turning ambiguous as to whether her shame is rooted in poor decision-making, loss of control, or the fact that the guy giving it to her doggy-style was half her height. Meanwhile, Maria the paddock host is casual about dating or sleeping with riders; protagonist Ryan is the one with opinions about it, and so the reader’s attitudes are directed by this point of view. It’s normative but distasteful, where the cast and producers of Everlasting find the idea of a jockey romantic lead neither normative nor tasteful.

Readers of the nonfiction canon of Thoroughbred writing will see reference to a few superstars of the sport edging into popular consciousness as viable romantic heroes. These nearly always fit within a certain profile: white, blond, all-American. Steve Cauthen, Chris Antley, Gary Stevens. Norman of UnREAL is, of course, white. Observers might also note that the current lineup of rock-star jocks is heavily Latino. The sport relies on sexy imagery to sell itself as glamorous and attractive but limits this imagery to female spectators and participants, largely sidelining the appeal of male participants. Barbara Livingston’s infamous beefcake calendar notwithstanding, racing is shot for, marketed to, and discussed almost totally within the realm of the heteronormative male gaze. It’s impossible to untangle the overarching reputation of jockeys from their status within the sport, their concurrent location at its center and its fringes. Physically, according to UnREAL and the accepted romantic tropes it trades on, riders cannot fit the profile of a romantic lead (they might tick the box marked abs with a bullet but they’re--gasp!--short). According to Southbound, reams of five-foot-seven-and-above women are willing to set this deficit aside, and starfucking can’t always account for taste, since low-level Portland Meadows riders get their fair share too.

It’s almost like the height-gap trope beloved of romance enthusiasts only applies to tall men and short women. Who’da thunk?

My favorite panel out of the two days I attended AWP’s writing conference was “Shooters Gotta Shoot: Voice in Sports.” Never have I felt so understood by a bunch of strangers! Author and panelist Katherine Hill noted that football players talk a lot, an offhand comment that kicked the hamster wheel of my brain into high gear. Do jockeys talk? Not where horseplayers can hear them, usually. What they say is filtered through the lens of what the trainer wanted from the race, how the odds stacked up, whether their horse won or lost. Their voices are reduced and fragmented from intersecting angles:

English may be a second language;

The sport of racing itself is a niche one, replete with specific, exclusive vocabulary;

Secretiveness prevails on the backstretch, while the pop-media view of Thoroughbreds relies on tired images of corruption, rigging, and under-the-table deals;

The riders’ place within their sport is layered with uncertainty, from physical danger to the tentative handshake that confirms a mount or takes it away.

If certain trainers had their way, jocks wouldn’t talk at all and no one would request it of them. They would be emotional whipping boys for the losing horse, emotionless mannequins for the winner. Within the shelves of fiction, it’s also rare to hear a jockey speak, likeliest in the crime-novel aisle under Francis. On Harlequin’s website, a search for “football” returns 142 titles, while “baseball” gets 94 options and “hockey” 73. These are the Big Three of sports romance, with basketball, soccer, tennis, NASCAR/F1, and all Olympics-related sports making minor showings as well. Horse racing, when it shows up, falls largely into historical-romance settings--a scandalous duchess at Newmarket, a sheikh’s stable girl--or again in crime and suspense, with horse-theft plots and murdered barn managers. Trainers appear as romantic hero/ines almost to a fault; out of Harlequin’s 9 results for “jockey,” only 2 titles feature an actual Thoroughbred jockey, and both characters are female. While I’m always pleased to read (and write) about female jocks, I don’t find it cynical to assume that these books exist in part because short women are palatable and appealing romantic heroines, while short men are perceived as having Napoleon complexes or little-guy syndromes, and generally being 200 pounds of testosterone in a 115-pound body. So who gets the happily-ever-after? Viking-esque hockey hotshots, American-beefcake ball players, and any hero who falls within an appropriate, narrow conception of heterosexual masculinity. Whose voices are reflected and amplified within the larger field of sports fiction? Whose experiences are projected as normatively male and typically American? Whose bodies are portrayed and received as alluring and desirable, and whose are operating within a historic context of abuse, control, and ownership?

I ground up my nerve to ask a question in that “Voice in Sports” panel, which I rarely manage because I’m a shy doofus. After the panelists’ conversation shifted to the imperial "we” of sports fandom, I asked Hill and poet Jason Koo to discuss how the collective love of fans for their sport can turn toxic--how the boundary is transgressed, at what point possessiveness becomes ownership and how that in turn affects how players are permitted to speak. I was thinking, as I am always thinking, of the relationships between horseplayers, trainers, owners, and jockeys; of that word, owner, and racing’s intertwined history with slavery; of a sport built on the underpaid and sometimes unpaid labor of people of color; of the vitriol casually displayed on the apron, as two days later at Tampa Bay Downs I’d listen to a man next to me yell SHITHEAD! at Julien Leparoux in a post parade. I said that racing is my sport of choice, waited for someone to say that racing isn’t a sport. I said after the panel, thanking Hill and Koo for their remarks, that I write romance--that I have marginalized my own voice in my choice of sport to write about, and my choice of genre to frame that sport, and my choice of mostly queer characters to people that sport’s fictional world.

Nonetheless Javier Castellano has his better story, his voice triumphing over Mike Smith’s. Nonetheless I write on, delighted in the space in which I’ve found myself, continue to find myself.

It’s my job as a romance writer to depict race-rider leads and love interests as exciting, sexy, and appealing. It’s my pleasure as a racing fan to depict jockeys themselves as multifaceted, compelling, and human.

#Urban Hayseed #diana's writing

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reviewheart101-blog · 5 years

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A Book Reviewer's Conundrum

Booklet reviewers and bibliophiles worldwide remain divided on two complex questions that fuel and pertain to their succeed and love of literature. 1 . Why do we review books? 2 . What is the best way to rate a guide? These two questions, aside from a pure love for literature and reading, drive the industry today. visit: reviewheart.com Purpose of Book Opinions Initially, one would assume that as a book reviewer it is the obligation and responsibility of reviewers to take on any reserve they accept. Although true, it is but one approach. What is the greater disservice to the public, not writing damaging review resulting in hundreds of dissatisfied consumers spending their time reading a poor novel or never getting to that innovative author on your reading list whose work is brilliant and reaches thousands because of a positive review? To many, which include myself, this is quite the predicament. However , W. H. Auden, I believe, puts it best when he advises, "Some books are undeservedly forgotten; non-e are undeservedly remembered. " Take a moment to really let that soak with. The significance of this quotation lay in the breadth and reality that many works of art and great masterpieces are never discovered and also truly valued, but works not worth remembering are just that; not remembered over time. Therefore , I now imagine it clear that I, as a reviewer have a responsibility to both warn patrons about negative products and also laud works that don't receive near enough attention. If a choice has to be made, as some irrational reviewers get predicated, I find it my personal responsibility to readers that I review and introduce a positive work over a lackluster product that will be forgotten in a matter of time without my involvement anyways. Furthermore, it is a bit sadistic and shameful to take a part in anything that can tarnish or hurt another's reputation. This assessment must and should be made aware to all this review and consider 'positive reviewers' as nothing more than 'marketers and profiteers'. It is far from the truth. The reviewer's greatest job is to write and inform authors and consumers about the quality and significance of books. The greatest crime devoted in that confidence and trust by consumers given to reviewers is the failure to acknowledge and make them aware of really marvelous literature. Some of you are now considering the thought that the aforementioned is a utopian ideal. Not all reviewers are identical and the majority of reviews found out there are not from reputable and professional reviewers. Websites have had frequent issues with copy writers glorifying their own work or hiring others to do the same. To contrast, some authors and reviewers deconstruct catalogs in order to tarnish a competitor's reputation. This is a reality and I am not so naïve to believe it does not happen. Despite the only thing that, I have faith that reviewers, overall, seek to provide readers and consumers with accurate reviews to help in their choosing decisions and development of future works. What choice do we have? The freedom to review and read everything else you like is more significant than the censorship of the whole lot for a minority's obstructive actions. Ratings and Book Critical reviews To this point, I have discussed the validity of reviewing methodology without even so much as mentioning a rating process aside from a formal written critique. Large online websites such as Amazon, GoodReads, and Barnes & Noble use site visitor reviewing systems in which nearly all can post reviews based on a five star system. Many issues arrive from this type of rating printed material. The lack of limitations and easy accessibility regarding this rating system style is a blessing and then a curse. All customers have access to writing their own reviews. This generates a vast amount of reviews to help customers in their getting decision, but amateur reviews can often be dishonest at the worst or misguided but true at best. Customers as well as others can post reviews and select stars in this fashion: 1 Star - I hate it 2 Star -- I dislike it 3 Star - It's OK 4 Star - I like it 5 Star - I love it In order for the review to be posted or at least submitted for publishing, 20 words or a movie must be submitted and a star rating MUST be submitted. Therein lay the real issue. Is a five star rating system one way to rate books and printed materials? Most reviewers and critics say no . Simply submitting a star score for a book does little justice for the author, nor does it aid consumers in deciding on the purchase; at the least it shouldn't. Plainly put, customers look at reviews to decide whether or not to read or purchase the product in question. While some glimpse only at the stars very quickly, most readers, after taking the time to click the reviews link, will go through a couple of that reviews. Depending on where they are at in the decision/buying process they will either find the shorter concise reviews or take time to methodically go over the longer reviews with greater depth. Most importantly, this process saves them time and sometimes profit the long run. The greater irony is that professional and reputable websites like industry titans, The New York Times and etc . formulate written critiques. Their exempt status is due to, for lack of a better phrase, no true rating system. It can be ironic that the best and most respectable reviewers in the business are not expected to give the books they review a rating or even number of stars when consumers navigating major websites gravitate toward the number of stars like a moth to a lamp. Then again, it is entirely sufficient for reviewing giants to use their words alone to either flatter and champion fictional works or tear down their very foundations so all that is left are a few sputtering words of which fall upon deaf ears. Many blogs do the same and maintain an exceptional identity as scholarly and well considered. Furthermore, the stars seem to be more of a point of controversy than a true value as evidenced by labels for the separate ratings. 'Like it', 'Love it', and 'Hate it' are subjective, and often times, vague words when associated with literature. Despite opaque meanings and terms from the eyes of the literary world, the five-star star ratings are easy for customers to understand and with a large enough quantity of ratings average out to a reasonable rating. Arguments (some have proven to be factual) have arisen about publishers and authors creating accounts in order to lionize or defame a course in the rating. Should one and two star reviews be given on these web sites and considered credible? Without a doubt, of course they should be. If a credible reviewer finds they have the time, energy, and desire to write and post a negative assessment, more power to them. Customers truly appreciate saving money when valid points are made regarding the inaccuracies and poor producing of a book or novel. There are both substantial and insubstantial 1-5 star ratings across the web. It is even more important to keep consumers informed and educated regarding how to sift through poorly written reviews. That is something that has nevertheless to really be undertaken and would most likely need to be the work of website moderators/editors than credible reviewers themselves. Until such time as that day comes, readers need to be made aware of how to analyze reviews on major websites. This can be done just by asking questions and looking for certain topics. To generalize (there are always exceptions! ), most online reliable reviews on these websites will contain a short plot summary, some sort of purpose or directive, a critique in the author and writing style, and an overall decision as to whether they would recommend the work to readers and sometimes even a particular audience. Look for those things book readers! Regarding the stars, analyzing that can be a bit trickier. I would hypothesize that the ratings would probably follow a standard distribution or deviation (sorry for getting statistical). I would presume that if an experiment was conducted considering the number of ratings for an author and their work would show the following results: a mainstream and well-marketed utilize a reputable author will receive more ratings and will more than likely find a fair value in the law of averages in contrast a lesser-known book with fewer reviews will be skewed in one direction. In other words, the more reviews a work maintain a pool of better chance that the average stars shown at the purchase screen are honest. Alternative Rating Systems The issue as to whether or not books should be rated on a five-star system seems a bit too late at this point due to how Amazon while others have become ingrained in the lifestyles of consumers and reviewers alike. However , there are alternatives to the traditional system that could be utilized by reviewers and customers alike. One alternative may be to extend the stars into a seven-point scale which gives a much more accurate account of how the customer or reviewer feels. For instance: 1: Poorly Written and Don't Read it two: Pretty bad, but not as bad as it could have been 3: Slightly bad 4: No preference or sentiments 5: Pretty good 6: Quite good, but not as good as it can get 7: Well written and a Must Read This seven-point level offers more options while maintaining clear and defined parameters in each category. A ten-point scale may well leave too much room for ambiguity and categories too close in meaning. However , this method is simply an proxy of the current methodology and offers little in terms of finding a voice and rating system singular and effective with reading and books. What may be the answer is an edgy alternative more like a survey than rating. If customers together with reviewers are presented with a series of yes or no questions, with values attributed to the answers, a final tally may be assessed and attached to the novel/book. What would this value carry or mean? Whatever you like; quills, book marks, two thumbs up. Any sort of value would be adequate so long as the professional and literary world agree upon the idea. This series of questions may include inquiries like, "Would you say the book was poorly written and challenging to understand? " or "Was the depicted setting vivid and fitting for the plot? ". I am not the most effective source as to what these questions should be nor do I claim to be an authority on the topic, but it is an challenging idea and could transform the way reviewers can rate and apply a value to a novel without having to decide concerning 'like' and 'really like'. It is evident, from the two predicaments facing professional and amateur reviewers alike, in which although the issues are complex, solutions are in the making and final resolutions can come from new and effective thinking. The introduction of the internet and its impact on daily life and globalism has truly changed the world. Reviews are usually more readily available and this has meant an exponential growth in the number of reviewers. Rating systems need to be reevaluated and tailored to the characteristics of books. A five star rating system in which the same standards are given to a lamp and a ebook should not be the case. Furthermore, reviewers must ask themselves why they write reviews and if that reason is a worth the authors who take so much time to write the works and consumers that spend hard-earned money on the product or service.

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givencontext · 5 years

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A Woman’s Words

Dystopian fiction is social commentary with a side of terror. It uses hyperbole to try and help us see that we are the frogs in the water that is starting to boil. It takes situations that some people are currently giving the side-eye, projects them into the future, and magnifies them x100. According to Rare Books Digest, the first dystopian novel was written in Russian but was banned and had it’s first release in the U.S. in 1924. What better way for such a form to make its debut than as a banned book? Aldous Huxley and George Orwell quickly took up the mantle, and dystopia soon became required reading in every high school English class. Most of us can’t get a diploma without reading Brave New World, 1984, or Fahrenheit 451. Now that it’s the 21st century, students are even reading female-authored dystopia such as Suzanne Collins’s The Hunger Games or Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale . If you loved The Handmaid’s Tale, you will want to read Vox by Christina Dalcher.

Despite all my rage…

This book made me angry. I named this blog Given Context, because there is often an uncanny overlap of the things I read and events in my life. Vox was a selection for my sci-fi book club, but I couldn’t attend the discussion because it conflicted with my tap dance class. I wanted to read the book anyway, so I put it on hold with the Overdrive app. I had to listen to the audiobook when it became available, but this was not a good time in my life to be listening to this book. Either that, or it was the perfect time. While I was reading/listening to it, I wrote this post about feeling like I had nothing to say. Is it ironic that a book that is meant to spur women into speaking up seemed to have the opposite effect on me?

Someone told me that something like this book could never happen. But I see far too clearly a world where women are ready and willing to hand over their power. I see it happen every day. I see myself doing it. I see women lined up to exchange their Apple watches for torture devices… better yet, there’s probably an app for that. I won’t pretend to be a history or political science expert, but didn’t something like this happen in Saudi Arabia? Didn’t women there formerly have rights and freedoms that were rescinded “for their own protection?” You don’t have to get very far down any #familyvalues comment thread to find a woman who has internalized misogyny to the point that she is eager to sign up for “protection.” These aren’t people talking out of their (blanks) … these are real women who really believe that someone else is better qualified to make decisions about their life and livelihood because he’s a man… and oh yeah, god said so. And no amount of rational argument is going to change someone’s mind when they really believe this… so we don’t argue. We let them be and keep our mouths shut. We keep the peace and assume it will get better. This book brings all that up, and my rage-meter was off the charts for several days after finishing it.

Literally me while reading Vox.

Words count

In Vox the counter on a woman’s wrist tracks how many words she says each day. Each woman is allowed 100 words. At this point in this blog, I have already written nearly 600 words. I think carefully about each word, because I am going to publish this, and a lot of my friends are English majors. Women are not allowed to use sign language or gestures. They aren’t allowed to write. They aren’t even supposed to read. Words are off limits beyond those 100 sacred utterances. The counter resets at midnight, there’s no saving up for tomorrow. Little girls are rewarded for staying silent at school. They are strapped into a torture device before they learn to speak, so they learn not to speak. If a woman exceeds her 100 words, this device delivers a shock. Each subsequent transgression earns an exponentially increased shock until she faints from the pain or until the shock is lethal. But this was for their own good.

What is a woman without words? How many times have you heard stereotypes about women talking too much? Have you ever called someone a chatty Cathy? I was once instructed that when talking to a particular male colleague I should “be bright, be brief, and be gone.” My reaction was to avoid any interaction with him from that point on. I’m not opposed to people being thoughtful about what they say, but I think it’s imperative as we move toward more inclusive cultures and work-spaces that we acknowledge that people don’t all think the same, and we won’t all talk the same. Stop trying to change women, and create spaces where we can really all be our authentic selves. Or else stop paying lip service to inclusion by only including those who fit a certain narrow concept of what is acceptable. Silencing women is so deeply ingrained in our culture, but that it’s hard to see all of the ways that it happens, even when you’re the one it’s happening to. I want to use my words right now to ask us all to look closer at all the ways this is happening. From when we speak and don’t speak to the words we choose. Listen closely.

Newspeak

Language is what separates us from the animals. George Orwell explored the intersection of Politics and the English Language in his 1946 essay. I might write an entire blog sometime comparing what he says there to the use of newspeak and the Ministry of Truth in 1984. Suffice it to say, for now, that language and the control of language is a central theme in dystopia. That being the case, Vox doesn’t introduce to anything new. It is, however, a distinctly modern dystopia. Most of the latest dystopian novels I have read take place in a world that has reverted to pre-smartphone lack of technology. In Vox, the technology is available, but only half the population has access. Education is available, but only half the population has access. If the book was set in another country, I would say it is all too believable. There are real countries on earth where girls, future women, do not have access to education, information, health care, feminine hygiene products, and other basic necessities that would enable and empower them. And I feel powerless to help them.

Now that you’re thoroughly depressed…

Let’s make sure that nothing like this happens in our great country. Let’s take note of when we are being silenced or when it is happening to someone else, and let’s speak up. Let’s pay attention to what is happening in other countries and use our privilege and influence where we can. Let’s read more books and write about them. And if all else fails, listen to some Rage Against the Machine. Just do something!

Have you read this book? Can you relate to the feeling of being silenced? What’s your favorite dystopia? What’s your favorite Rage song? Leave a comment!

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