#it's so frustrating when stuff like this happens

[woniescheeks]

Flustered

Synopsis: In which Enhypen leaves you flustered with their sweet gestures, playful teasing, and protective sides, making you feel loved and embarrassed all at once.

W/C: 2.3k Warnings: Light teasing, fluff, mild embarrassment, protective behaviours 

Pairing: bf!enhypen x gn!reader  Genre: Fluff, Romance  AU: Established Relationship 

LEE HEESEUNG

You’re curled up on the couch, scrolling through your phone with a blanket draped over your legs. Heeseung walks into the room, holding his guitar like it’s no big deal. He plops down beside you, the couch dipping slightly under his weight, and starts strumming lazily. 

You glance at him, raising an eyebrow. “Practicing again?” 

“Something like that,” he says with a smirk before breaking into a sweet melody. The song sounds oddly familiar, and then you realize—he’s improvising lyrics about you. They’re cheesy, talking about how your laugh is his favourite sound and how even your messy hair is perfect to him. 

“You’re not serious,” you say, raising an eyebrow as you glance at him. 

“About what?” Heeseung asks innocently, a teasing glint in his eyes. 

“About playing me a song right now,” you reply, crossing your arms. “You know I’m not falling for that cheesy stuff.” 

Heeseung only grins and leans in closer. “I’m not trying to be cheesy,” he says, strumming the guitar a little louder. “But I think you’re already falling for it.” 

You roll your eyes, but you can’t help but smile. “Please don’t make this any worse, Heeseung.” 

But before you know it, he starts singing again. The lyrics this time were about how you light up his world, how he’s so lucky to be with you, and how even your quirks are perfect to him.  

You groan, hiding your face behind your hands. “Heeseung, stop!” 

“Why? Am I making you blush?” he teases, leaning closer, still playing. His voice softens, and he gives you this look—part playful, part sincere—that makes your heart skip. “You’re really cute when you’re embarrassed, you know?” 

“Not cute! I’m dying of second-hand embarrassment,” you reply, but you can’t help but smile. Heeseung’s face lights up as he continues to sing, and for a moment, nothing else matters but his voice and the way he makes you feel like you’re the most important person in the world. 

PARK JONSEONG

You’re in the kitchen, huffing in frustration while trying to open a jar of pasta sauce. “Ugh, seriously?” you mutter to yourself, tugging at it harder. Just as you’re about to give up, you hear Jay’s voice behind you. 

“Need some help, babe?” he asks, his voice dripping with that familiar confidence. You turn to see him standing there, hands casually in his pockets.

“No, I got it,” you say quickly, not wanting to admit you’re struggling. You give the lid another twist. 

Jay just raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, it looks like you really got it,” he teases. “Let me just do it.” he says, already reaching for the jar. Before you can even answer, he takes it from your hands and pops the lid off like it’s nothing with a smirk on his face. “You can’t do everything yourself, you know.” 

You cross your arms, huffing in mock annoyance. “I could’ve gotten it! It’s just a jar!” 

“Sure you could,” he says, giving you a look that says he’s not buying it for a second. “But you didn’t. And now I’m the hero of the day.” 

“Show-off,” you mutter, but before you can grab the jar back, he steps closer. His chest brushes lightly against your shoulder as he leans down to whisper in your ear, “How would you survive without me, huh?” 

His voice is low, smooth, and so close that you freeze. The warmth of his breath on your skin sends a jolt straight to your stomach. You try to come up with a comeback, but all that comes out is a flustered laugh. 

Jay pulls back with a grin, clearly proud of himself. “You’re welcome,” he says casually, setting the jar down like nothing happened, leaving you to process your racing heart. 

“Ugh, whatever,” you mutter, trying to hide the smile tugging at your lips. “But I definitely don’t need a ‘hero.’” 

“Of course you do,” he replies, winking. “Every superhero has their sidekick.” 

SIM JAEYUN

 You’re standing in front of the mirror, frowning as you debate between two outfits. Jake sits on the edge of the bed, watching you with his head propped up on his hand. 

“Which one do you like better?” you ask, holding up both options. 

He doesn’t even look at the clothes. Instead, he says, “You.” 

You pause, blinking at him. “What?” 

He grins, standing up and walking over to you. “I mean, you could wear either of those—or nothing at all—and you’d still look amazing.” 

You roll your eyes, trying to hide how flustered you are. “That’s not helpful.” 

Jake laughs softly, wrapping his arms around you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulder. “I’m serious. You could wear a trash bag, and I’d still think you’re the most beautiful person in the room.” 

Your cheeks burn as you swat at him. “Stop it, Jake!” You laugh nervously, but Jake isn’t done.

“Actually, scratch that,” he says, his voice softer now. “You’d still outshine the sun even if you wore a potato sack.” 

Rolling your eyes, you try to step away, but Jake gently pulls you back, wrapping his arms loosely around your waist. He rests his forehead lightly against the side of your head, his voice dropping to a quiet murmur. “Why do you always get so shy when I tell you how amazing you are?” 

You let out a small laugh, shaking your head. “Because you’re so extra sometimes,” you mumble, but there’s a smile tugging at your lips. 

Jake chuckles, pressing a quick kiss to your temple. “Can’t help it,” he says with a grin you can feel more than see. “I mean, have you looked in the mirror lately? You make it way too easy for me to hype you up.” 

You glance at him, finally letting out a real laugh as the warmth of his words starts to sink in. “You’re ridiculous,” you tease, but your voice is soft, affectionate. 

“And you love it,” he quips, pulling back just enough to look at you properly. His expression shifts, becoming more tender as he brushes a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “For real, though,” he adds, his voice steady and sincere, “you’re beautiful” 

Your face warms, but this time, you don’t try to hide it. Instead, you lean into him, resting your head on his chest with a content sigh. 

He just laughs again, pressing a quick kiss to your temple. “You’re perfect without even trying.” 

PARK SUNGHOON

It’s a lazy Saturday morning, and you’re lounging around in an oversized hoodie, feeling cozy and not at all concerned about how you look. You’re still in your pajamas, hair a mess, and in your fuzzy socks on the couch when Sunghoon enters the room, looking as put-together as ever. 

He stops in his tracks when he sees you. “Wow. Are you trying to set a new record for the ‘cozy chic’ look?” 

You glance over at him and laugh, tugging the sleeves of your hoodie over your hands. “What do you mean?” 

“Well,” Sunghoon says, crossing his arms, “I mean, it’s kind of unfair. Even when you’re like this”—he gestures at your hoodie—“you’re still so cute it’s ridiculous.” 

You blink, completely caught off guard. “Excuse me?” 

He walks closer to you, his eyes playful. “I mean, you could wear literally anything, and I’d still think you’re cute, but you’re not even trying today.” 

“You’re ridiculous!” you exclaim, grabbing a sofa pillow and throwing it at him. 

But Sunghoon catches it effortlessly, his smirk only growing. “What? I’m just stating the obvious. You know you’re perfect, even when you don’t try.” 

He rests his arms on the armrest of the sofa and leans in as you give him a funny look. “What? Can’t handle a little truth?” 

You sigh dramatically. “You’re such a handful, you know that?” 

“I know,” Sunghoon says, leaning down to kiss the top of your head. “But you still love me, don’t you?” 

You bite your lip, trying not to smile. “Maybe.” 

KIM SUNOO

You’re walking through the park with Sunoo, holding hands and chatting about everything and nothing. The day is perfect—blue skies, a light breeze, and his hand warm in yours. 

Suddenly, he stops walking. “Hold on,” he says, looking down. 

You follow his gaze and realize your shoelace is untied. Before you can bend down to fix it, Sunoo crouches in front of you, taking your foot gently in his hands. 

“Sunoo, I can do it,” you protest, feeling your face heat up as people glance your way. 

“Shh, I’ve got it,” he says, tying the laces with a practiced ease and looks up at you with a cheeky smile. “You don’t want to trip, do you?”  

You roll your eyes. “I’m fine! I can tie my own shoes.” 

“Yeah, but I’m the one who always makes sure you don’t fall,” Sunoo teases, finishing the knot with a neat little bow and standing up. “Can’t have you getting hurt on my watch.” 

You’re about to thank him when he stands up and brushes off his pants. “You’re lucky I’m here to take care of you,” he teases, linking his arm with yours again. 

You try to act annoyed, but the affection in his voice makes it impossible not to feel warm inside. You shake your head, trying to ignore how flustered you feel. “You’re too much sometimes.” 

“And you love it,” he shoots back with a grin. 

YANG JUNGWON

It’s another quiet night, and you’re both on the couch, wrapped in your favourite blanket. The warm light from the lamps in the room casts a soft glow, and the sound of the movie playing in the background is just a distant hum compared to the peaceful silence between you two. You’ve been talking here and there, laughing about silly things, but now you’re both just enjoying each other’s presence. 

You notice your hands are getting colder, and you instinctively start rubbing them together to warm them up. At first, you don’t think much of it. But then, you feel Jungwon’s gaze on you. 

Without a word, he shifts closer to you, his arm around you tightening slightly, as if to pull you into him even more. You’re about to make some sarcastic comment, but before you can, Jungwon takes your hand gently, his fingers warming up your cold ones. 

“You’re freezing,” he says quietly, his voice laced with concern, as if he can’t stand seeing you uncomfortable. 

You chuckle softly, trying to brush it off. “I’m fine. It’s just a little cold. It’ll pass.” 

Jungwon’s brow furrows slightly, but he doesn’t let go of your hand. He’s staring at your fingers, noticing how icy they are, and his dimple pops out as his lips curl into a small frown. “You really are freezing,” he murmurs, rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand slowly, trying to transfer his warmth to you. 

You feel your heart flutter at the tenderness of his touch. It’s so simple, yet it feels so intimate. You look up at him, not expecting the softness in his eyes. 

“Jungwon, you really don’t have to do that,” you say, your voice almost a whisper, suddenly feeling more vulnerable than you thought you would. 

But he just shakes his head, his expression softening as he looks at you. “I want to.” His voice is low, genuine, and you can tell he’s not saying it just to reassure you. He means it. 

Before you can argue, Jungwon scoots even closer, taking both your hands in his. He brings them to his lips, gently kissing the tops of your fingers, sending a wave of warmth through your body that has nothing to do with the temperature. 

“You’re not used to people taking care of you, huh?” he says with a small smile, but there’s a hint of curiosity in his voice, almost as if he’s trying to understand you better. 

You look down, feeling a little embarrassed but also touched by how attentive he’s being. “I guess not. But it’s not like I need it all the time,” you murmur, trying to play it cool. 

Jungwon just smiles, this time with a hint of mischief in his eyes. “It’s not about needing it. I just want you to feel comfortable. And I’m always going to make sure you’re okay, even if you don’t ask.” 

Your heart skips a beat, and for a moment, you can’t find words. His kindness always catches you off guard, especially when it’s so genuine and effortless. He’s not doing this for any reason other than that he cares. 

You shift, leaning into him a little more, suddenly feeling the weight of his affection, making everything seem so much more real. “You’re going to spoil me, you know that?” 

Jungwon chuckles, his hands still holding yours. “Maybe. But I like doing it. You’re worth it.” 

NISHIMURA RIKI

You’re walking through a crowded mall, shopping with Ni-ki. The place is packed, and as you’re navigating through the crowd, someone accidentally bumps into you. You stumble slightly, but before you can even react, Ni-ki is already there, stepping in front of you like a shield. 

“Are you okay?” he asks immediately, his eyes scanning you for any sign of discomfort. 

You quickly nod, trying to downplay it. “I’m fine, don’t worry.” 

But Ni-ki’s eyes narrow, clearly not convinced. “Stay close to me,” he says firmly, his hand gently slipping around your waist to pull you toward him as he expertly manoeuvres through the crowd, guiding you with ease. 

You look up at him, a little startled by how serious he seems. “Ni-ki, you don’t need to protect me from everything,” you say, trying to brush it off. 

But he just shrugs, still holding you close. “I’m your boyfriend, it’s my duty, I just want to make sure nothing happens to you.” His tone is calm, but the protective edge in his voice is obvious, and there’s no way you can argue with that. 

You roll your eyes, but there’s no denying how sweet he’s being. “You’re such a mom sometimes,” you tease, trying to lighten the mood. 

Ni-ki smirks, his protective hold never loosening. “Well, I’m a good one, aren’t I?” 

“You’re impossible,” you say, though your heart skips a beat at how endearing he’s being. 

“I know,” he says with a wink, squeezing you closer. “But you’ll thank me later when nothing happens to you.” 

You can’t help but smile. “Fine, fine. But only because you’re cute.” 

Ni-ki’s grin widens as he leads you through the crowd, making sure to keep you close, and for the rest of the day, it’s clear he’s not about to let anything happen to you. 

“Stay close, okay?” he says softly, a little more quietly this time, and it’s in that moment you realize just how much he cares. 

You smile, leaning into him a little more as you walk side by side. “Yeah, okay. I’ll stay close.” 

[justallihere]

Okay, I did some laundry, I've had lunch, I've breathed fresh air and taken some deep breaths (did not touch any grass because it's covered in snow), and we're back. My wrap up thoughts of Onyx Storm are below! Be warned it's chock full of spoilers, and these are all my honest opinions. I haven't even given this a rating yet because I don't really know what I want to rate it! Nothing's really in order so sorry about that. But I look forward to hearing everyone else's thoughts!

I loved that the importance of the bond between dragon and human was emphasized so heavily in this book. That Asher called Aimsir Lilith's first love, Violet telling Tairn he's the gift of her life, that even Halden knew that the true barrier to her would be the dragon bond - and especially that when Xaden channeled again, in a way that he knew would irreversibly damn him, he did it for Sgaeyl. To keep her safe, because she chose him before and above everyone else.

I adored the Riorgail of it all. They were open and honest with each other, saying I love you practically every other breath, declaring their loyalty and devotion to each other in front of anyone who would listen. I loved that we got them as a team, facing stuff together and trusting that what they couldn't the other could handle it.

On the other hand, it may just be me but they didn't quite feel like themselves. Maybe because it was the first time we've truly seen them be public about their feelings, but they didn't feel like the same Xaden and Violet from the previous two books. Xaden felt so intense that everything he said gave me anxiety, devoted to the point of obsession. I would actually call Violet morally gray here, but it came out of nowhere; there wasn't a great transition into that change in her character, none of the hesitation or guilt I'd expect.

In short, they kind of felt like my Xaden and Violet and not canon? I loved them, but I'm not sure it matches what we know of them from FW and IF and the change in character didn't feel entirely smooth.

But Xaden IS her sword!!!!

The worldbuilding was ridiculous. Violet was dropping facts left right and center like the details of the aristocracy and politics at play were common knowledge - and maybe they are in world, but if they're that obvious then I feel like those details should've been worked into earlier books. I felt like I was floundering trying to keep up with all the new names and titles and roles.

In the same vein, the lore about magic made no sense. So only the Continent has magic but why? Was it drained from other places? Does it only occur naturally in certain areas? Dragons don't have magic that exists within them - they also draw from the source which? Hello hypocrites much? That was another thing that was said so casually, but that should've been one of those things we learned in Fourth Wing, at Threshing or right after.

There was too much happening with the plot to the point that I lost it completely. The trips to the isles were overwhelming. I know the venin and the irids were tied together, but those two things competed so much that I kept forgetting about whichever one we weren't talking about. Literally just. . . forgot about the venin there for a bit in the middle. We were looking for a cure but we were looking for Andarna's kind but we were trying to stop the venin and we were also gathering allies and making trade deals and none of those points were fleshed out completely.

The ending was vague and confusing in a way that made me frustrated instead of interested or anticipatory. I read the last two chapters three times and I still don't know what the fuck was going on there. So the Sage is. . . Fen? Is Garrick the one who also turned? Bodhi? Brennan? Ridoc? Fuck if I know. I understand the point of the marriage, to give Violet control over Tyrrendor legally, but I'm also pissed at the way it happened.

I know we don't want anyone to actually die, but I literally didn't even flinch when Mira's throat got cut open because I figured she'd be fine. There were no important deaths. Trager and Quinn didn't hit that hard. Not putting any of the main characters in significant danger makes the stakes feel lower than they should.

The fan service made me roll my eyes. I get it to a certain extent, but there were several times when I legitimately kind of felt like RY had been in fandom spaces or someone on her team was just feeding her popular theories to include.

The marked ones having second signets was. . . not my favorite choice, because logistically it doesn't make much sense. We should statistically see at least one of them go mad from the power instead of developing a second signet. And I actually think if that had been included it would have been more interesting! I'd like to see the reality of the risks that were taken to make the rebellion happen, but instead they just got really really lucky a bunch of times?

The use of the word Riorgail in print sent me to the fucking moon. No.

Violet's second signet. . . I don't want to talk about it.

Actually no I do. Since when are signets based on situational need and not who a person is at their core? Was that not what we were told previously? Am I tripping? I don't mind the power itself but I am confused.

Professor Riorson had me on the ground laughing. What the hell was that. There are enough barriers to their relationship, and that one felt too forced (but great fodder for smutty fic).

The characters and their relationships are the standout of the book and the series. I already said I loved Xaden and Violet here, but I also loved their friendships and how real especially the relationship with Brennan and Mira and Violet felt. The humor and the quips and the squad's constant support of each other was wonderful.

I'm holding onto those Sloane and Dain crumbs like a teddy bear you all have no idea. I love them.

Aaric being the one with precognition I didn't see coming, but I surprisingly liked it! I loved him stepping more into his role as prince and seeing how cunning and smart he really is.

Halden was unnecessary but I live for possessive and jealous Xaden.

Overall I think the pacing was crammed and the worldbuilding left me with more questions than answers, but did I still like it? Yes! I don't think it's my favorite in the series but it still was an enjoyable read. I'll want to read it again at some point I think, but not immediately!

[transfemme-shelterdog]

TA Testimony

Thanks for publishing these testimonies! I’m gonna send just one of my experiences, but I have so many to choose from! This one is relatively benign but illustrative I feel:

An ex friend was driving a car with me in the back seat. A cis man (afaik) cut her off, which made her angry. She turned to me and said, “Must be easy being a man!”

It was frustrating how she took her understandable anger at this man and when she couldn’t speak directly to him she directed it at me instead. I’ve noticed this happens to me a lot: a cis man does something shitty, but it would be dangerous to hold him to account so I get held accountable instead. The secret is that cis women have structural power over trans men, so they can say to us the stuff they always wished they could say to cis men but without the risk of patriarchal power punishing them for it.

I tried to push back when she said this, tried to explain that things were a lot more complicated for trans men. She interrupted me and told me I would always be her “Benny-wenny.”

I’m sick of being the sin eater for shitty cis men. I’m sick of being treated like a baby when I resist. I’m sick of transandrophobia.

.

[hanamukes]

Uika in Ave Mujica episode 4

For episodes 1-3 of the Ave Mujica anime, I felt like while there was definitely stuff going on with Uika that's worth unpacking, the scenes were straightforward enough in what they wished to convey that I didn't feel like they warranted explanation. Episode 4 has completely turned my view of this character on its head though. It feels as if her every word and action in this episode completely contradicts what we knew of her prior. What is going on with her?

I wanted to talk about her in a longform post, so here I am. This is maybe half analysis, half just me rambling my thoughts on what's happening on screen.

DISCLAIMER: If you're not familiar with the way I discuss this character, let me make it clear now that I absolutely love her! This post is essentially a love poem dedicated to how fantastic I think her writing is. That said my tone here might come off a bit sharp, because of how contradictory she is (which I say as a compliment) and how I want to grab her by the scruff and shake her until she tells me what's going on inside that head of hers. Just wanted to mention something before anyone gets the impression I'm criticizing her or the writing when I'm doing nothing of the sort.

Her first moment happens and immediately a lot stands out to me

First: the models in this anime fall under two specifications, girls who always have a blush programmed in and girls who don't. For instance, Sakiko has one so she's always blushing no matter her mood. Uika doesn't. But throughout this entire episode, she does. Why? Why is she so... eerily happy, in a way we have never seen her before?

Secondly, what is her aim here? Sakiko expressed her discomfort with everyone's attitudes, and rather than just being "Sakiko's second voice" as she has been up until now (take the episode 3 fight as an example), she's taking everyone else's side. Her actions are already in total contradiction with the Uika we've seen up until now, who didn't care about anything except easing Sakiko's feelings

Then this happens. Uika is basically in la-la land daydreaming about having her destiny tied to Sakiko's forever (especially because Nyamu points out that sounds like something Sakiko would say), yet she's ignoring her beloved who sits on the other side of the table

Uika, do you really love Mujica as it is when Sakiko's expressing to you directly that she's unhappy?

Ironically, when she does acknowledge Sakiko directly, it only leads to further frustration for Sakiko

Because she's focusing on the wrong thing. She's more worried about Sakiko's exhaustion from writing songs (which is something she can physically see, thus easily pick up on) rather than Sakiko's concerns with the band (which is something she'd have to actually stop to think about). It really feels like she doesn't understand Sakiko at all. How much does she actually stop to think about her feelings? How surface leveled, rose-colored lens does she view her?

Her actions here scream, "well, so long as I get to stay with Sakiko, I don't actually care if she's happy," regardless of if that's her intent. Sometimes your inner feelings aren't enough, Uika. Sakiko is actively looking miserable in front of you and what are you doing about it?

Are you really just going to leave without saying anything to her? You express concern when halfway out the door, yet when face to face with Sakiko, you act like nothing is wrong?

Again, yes, Sakiko is exhausted, but that's not all there is to it Uika. And she hasn't exactly been subtle about what she's worried about!

Mortis keeps the focus of the conversation to Sakiko having to write all the scripts (thus prompting Uika to point out that she's been pulling all-nighters and maybe that's the problem), but I quite like this line, as there's a lot to unpack here

前はそういうの絶対見せなかったのに

The translation gets the idea across fine to be clear, but in Japanese, there's an emphasis on the "never" part. It feels unthinkable to Uika that Sakiko would perhaps lash out, or show her exhaustion to the others. Kind of putting a mental pin in this because that's not the impression we, the viewers, have seen from prior episodes (Sakiko in this episode was acting incredibly in line with what we've seen of her already in this anime), so I wonder where Uika got this idea from. It makes you wonder just what Uika's impression of "normal" or "prior" Sakiko is

This line is genuinely sweet of her, if not a bit ironic because Uika's already absolutely overworking herself for Sakiko, which Sakiko pointed out in episode 1 (a lot of the officially published interviews have been pointing this out over and over too, just as a side note). They really want to ease each other's burdens...

Yeah, we're not even being subtle about Uika having to "borrow" ways to cheer people up anymore

I actually noticed this about her even back in It's MyGO. When Uika comforted Tomori in episode 10, it was eerily close to what Sakiko did in episode 3. Tomori even associated Uika's actions as being reminiscent of Sakiko's behavior. I had no evidence about Uika copying what Sakiko did then (I don't... think? know? that Uika saw Sakiko's meeting with Tomori and thus could copy it), but now? There's evidence that perhaps her acts of generosity are in fact just things she's imitating from others. If you're curious about the It's MyGO example of this, I highly recommend watching this for yourself

Oh, I'll also mention that in my pre-anime analysis post for Uika, I mentioned she probably doesn't "shine" at all as an idol without Mana, and she more or less just confirmed that for us

Again there's a lot to unpack with this part

Hoo boy. Let's go back an episode. In episode 3, Uika was feeling insecure about the fact Sakiko "knew" Mutsumi "very well since they were kids." She looked visibly bothered by it before changing the topic. So hearing from "Mutsumi" herself that "Actually, you're the one closest to Sakiko, not me" must be making her day. Mortis is actively using Uika's affection for Sakiko against her (well, for the sake of the band, but she's still manipulating (for lack of a better word) her regardless). It's a bit harrowing when you realize that Uika's happy that her "competition" for being close with Sakiko is dead, despite her not realizing Mutsumi more or less is dead at this point...

Moving on to the scene in her apartment, my only addition here is... well, it sure is something how the only things she said to Sakiko were what Mortis told her to say. She has no lines here that weren't just parroting advice. Is that really all you have to say to your beloved?

This is an interesting comment from her

Because there's a couple ways you could interpret this. Is Uika referring to the "stiff" expression, or the close proximity? We know for Sumimi, she views herself as having a "terrible expression" (when Mana's not around to change her energy), but it's also not lost on me that it could also be referring to "my image of Sumimi [where we take photos together in close proximity]"

Sakiko's reaction to this is what makes it so meaningful to me

Nyamu and the photographers are saying "this doesn't look like Mujica at all, but that's a good thing," which Sakiko is obviously displeased about. Why would going against Mujica's worldview be a good thing? And yet... even Uika, who founded the band with her and who writes all their songs, is saying she likes the photo. Once again, Uika is completely disregarding Sakiko's feelings despite how close she is to her. Physically, they're almost close enough to brush shoulders, but emotionally, I don't think Sakiko's ever felt further from her. The betrayal in her face and voice feels so obvious, yet Uika's still in la-la land like she was earlier in the episode and doesn't acknowledge it at all... we really can put ourselves in Sakiko's shoes throughout the whole episode, because truly, what is going through Uika's head?

Uika doing sweet gestures for Sakiko. This is the character I recognize!

It's not lost on me that 1. she has two umbrellas like she does in her apartment, and 2. there's this almost eerie focus on Uika making coffee for people. I say this because the opening itself has a shot of her mugs, there's that weirdly placed clip of coffee dripping in episode 2 (it's also in one of the trailers), the donut scene in episode 3, and now this. I'll be interested in seeing why this is so important to her

I do wish we had gotten to see the conversation Uika and Sakiko had here. Sakiko has a habit of brushing Uika off, but she was finally able to open up to her about something. They finally talked together amidst all of this miscommunication and not understanding one another, but we didn't get to see it... (which may be a sign they didn't really talk about much, but hey, I like my Uisaki crumbs where I can get them)

Thank you for the confirmation that Uika would be the first victim in a slasher film. Moving on

I love the way this comment is framed. If Sakiko left the band, who would be most hurt? Sakiko or Uika?

Uh oh. She's having her words used against her

What she said in episode 3 was honestly a bit careless* (she said it in front of Sakiko, who famously broke up Crychic by leaving it)... but she did have a point. She just wanted to articulate that Ave Mujica should be the 5 of them, and that surely they have a strong enough bond that if one of them left, they wouldn't be able to carry on and just "find a replacement," right? She's our kindhearted front of the band who loves everyone equally, right?

Well

(To clarify the translation, it's not super clear whether Uika said this directly to her, or if Mortis just hit the nail on the head)

Oops! Now that's an awkward position to be in, especially in front of Sakiko herself! Zero denial either...

(*I'll just tack this thought on here, but there's potential Uika's "Please don't hate me" line from the trailer could be because she feels guilt for having said the "if one member quits it's over" line (and thus bringing about the downfall of the band))

Last thing for this episode...

Same, Mortis. What? Why does she have no fight in her? Why doesn't she care? Why is she not saying anything? Are her feelings of guilt, embarrassment and self-hatred actually overpowering her drive to be with Sakiko? Is it over for her, now that the cat's out of the bag regarding the fact she only ever cared about the band to be with Sakiko?

I noticed she acted like a kicked puppy in episode 3 as well. When someone points out how selfish she actually is, she loses all her edge and goes quiet. She wants to escape the situation. She can't fight against what's true about her (the ugliness in her heart), after all, lest she drives herself into a corner as a hypocrite even more than she already has. But her reactions are fascinating to me, because you'd think the front of the band, and someone who swore her life to Sakiko out of profound love for her, would put up more of a fight to keep the band together so she can stay with her. She's not doing damage control at all, she's just taking the hits and all the impact that comes with it. Maybe it's some form of self harm...

(I'm also incredibly curious to know what Sakiko thought of all of this, but maybe that was the least of her concerns...)

Anyway, we'll see what happens next week. I wonder if and when we'll get closure on why she's been so apathetic to Sakiko, despite her claimed devotion for her. I get the impression Sakiko will be moving out (next episode?), so we'll have to see how she reacts to that...

[jinx-isha-forever]

Kiss it Better

(Jinx x fem!reader)

Summary: you are making Jinx a knife in her workshop, but cut yourself in the process. Jinx fixes you up

Warnings: blood. hand injury.

A/N: This is an idea I’ve had for a while. Enjoy!

“Dammit.” The knife you were holding slipped. Cutting your hand in the process. Blood starts to drip on to the table.

“Shit no.” You quietly curse yourself.

You grab a random rag, trying to clean the mess.

You were no stranger to building stuff. You were actually pretty good at it.

However, this was your first time working in Jinx’s workshop.

So, you weren’t too familiar with all the different tools.

You also, were working too quickly, wanting to finish the knife, before Jinx got back.

Which led to the knife slipping.

You huff. Frustrated at yourself. You start to look for the first aid kit. Jinx moves it around daily. So, it could be anywhere.

You kneel down, looking through some boxes when you hear a noise……

-Jinx is coming-

You scramble to your feet. Putting your injured hand behind your back.

“Hey”a toots! Why are you in my workshop hu?”

Jinx walks in. Mischief in her eyes, looking you over.

“Did you just miss me that much?”

She says teasingly, getting closer to you.

You take a step back. Trying to stand in front of the unfinished knife laying on the table.

“Umm….hiii.” You say awkwardly, holding your injured hand tightly behind your back.

“You know me. I ahhh….just needed to ummm….” You continue to take steps back, until you hit the edge of the work table.

“Hey! Whatcha hidden behind your back?” She raises an eyebrow, a smirk on her face.

“Did you get me somethin? Oooor what?”

She presses. Getting even closer. Now only a few feet away.

“Come on….let me see. The suspense is killing me.”

She says dramatically, putting her lip out in a pouting manner.

“No it’s not what you think. I was-“

Jinx quickly grabs your shoulder, spinning you around, playfully giggling.

But stops when she sees the blood.

“Wh….what happen?”

You turn back around to look at her, holding your injured hand.

“Jinx I-“

“Who did this to you?”

Her playful demeanor is gone. Her voice is serous.

“Give me a name.” She demands.

“No it’s not like that…. No one hurt me.”

She looks at you confused.

“Then what…. I…. I don’t understand—“

“Accident…. It was an accident. I was making you a knife…and working to fast, trying to finish before you got back….. then the knife slipped and well-“

You stop rambling. Holding up your injured hand.

Jinx becomes lighter, letting out a breath.

“Aww….you made me a knife..”

“Surpriseeee…..”

You say, rubbing the back of your neck with your good hand.

Jinx is standing right in front of you. A soft smile on her lips.

“Y’know that’s really sweet of you trinket…”

She tucks a strain of hair behind your ear making you blush.

“Now….. let’s get you fixed up!”

Her eyes start darting around.

“There should be a first aid kit somewhereeeee.” She begins looking under tables.

“Aaaha! Found it!”

You look at the small container. It had neon paint splattered all over it.

You jump up on the work table.

“Okay. Let me see what I’m working with.”

She motions to your hand.

“I mean, It’s not that bad. I think I can just do it myself.”

You say looking at the bandages.

“Don’t be silly. I promise I’ll be careful. Okay.”

You pause, before nodding, giving her your hand.

“I trust you Jinx.” Your voice just above a whisper. Jinx’s cheeks flushed at your words.

She looks down at your injury.

The cut wasn’t too deep, but it ran across your thumb to the back of your hand.

“Soooo, we’ve definitely got to clean this. Which is gonna sting like pretty bad.”

You nod. Ready.

Jinx pours a liquid over your hand.

You slightly wince at the sensation.

She starts to softly blow on the wound. Which helped soothe the nerves.

“There we go….all clean.”

She glances up at you briefly.

“You know….you have really pretty hands.”

Her voice is soft as she holds your hands with care.

“Jinx.” you roll your eyes.

“What…..you do.”

She smirks.

“Now we just have to rap it up!”

She grabs some gauze and begins to carefully rap it around your hand.

“When I’m all done I’m gonna draw tiny little doodles all over hand.”

She says, poking your hand.

You let out a little laugh. Watching her wind the gauze around and around your hand.

“And there we go, all better! You’re as good as new!”

She chuckles lightly.

“How do you feel?”

“It feels a lot better! Thank you doctor Jinx.”

You say in a funny voice, as you begin to stand.

“Oh wait wait wait…. I almost forgot.”

She looks at you mischief in her eyes once again.

“I gotta kiss it better. Otherwise, all my hard work will have been for nothing.”

You pause. Before deciding to play along.

“Well, we can’t have that. My hand might fall off or something as a result.”

You look closely at your bandaged hand.

“Exactly!”

She holds your injured hand up kissing it softly.

“Oh and aw…give me the other one too.”She kisses your other hand.

“And just to be safe.” She gets up on her tiptoes kissing your cheek. And then the other one.

You are a blushing mess at this point.

“And who can forget……”

Her lips meet yours in a sweet kiss.

You can’t help but smile.

“You know I really love you right?”

You say, pulling away just enough to look into her eyes. You want her to know you mean it.

She nods. Putting her forehead to yours.

“I love you too my little trinket.”

[eternaldesi]

╰ dad!chris x . Mom!reader ᨸ Chris hesitantly agrees to let you have a girls’ night out, promising he’s got the kids under control—only to FaceTime you for help when the toddler throws a tantrum.

IT HAD BEEN WEEKS OF NON-STOP FAMILY LIFE. Between work, the kids’ activities, and keeping everything running smoothly at home, you hadn’t had a night to yourself in what felt like forever. So, when your friends suggested a girls’ night out, you jumped at the chance. After all, you deserved a little fun and relaxation, right? You glanced over at Chris, who was sprawled on the couch in his usual laid-back fashion, playing a game on his phone. “Hey, babe,” you started, trying to sound casual, but you could feel the nerves creeping in. “I was thinking I could go out with the girls tonight. Just for a few hours.” Chris looked up from his phone, eyes widening slightly at the mention of you leaving. He put down his phone, his expression shifting to one of concern. “Wait, you want to leave me alone with the kids?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. You laughed lightly, not sure if he was joking. “Chris, you’ve got this. They’ll be fine. You’re a great dad.” He hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. “I know, but… I don’t know. What if something happens? What if they get… I don’t know… messy? Or—” You raised an eyebrow. “Chris, you’ve been around the kids for a long time. I’m sure you’ll figure it out. Besides, it’s just a few hours. I’ll be back before you know it.” He sighed dramatically but eventually relented, giving you a smile of reassurance, even though you could tell he was still nervous. “Fine, fine. But if they start a riot or something, I’m calling you.” “Deal,” you said, laughing as you grabbed your purse. “I’ll be just a phone call away. Have fun with the kids, Dad.”

A FEW HOURS LATER, you were at a lively restaurant with your friends, enjoying a much-needed break. You’d forgotten how nice it felt to be around adults, away from the chaos of home. As the night went on, you found yourself laughing and chatting freely, your stress melting away with each glass of wine. But then, your phone buzzed. You pulled it from your purse, glancing at the screen. It was a FaceTime call from Chris. You frowned, puzzled. Was everything okay? You answered the call, and Chris’s face popped up on the screen, looking a little frazzled. Behind him, you could hear the sounds of children—loud, high-pitched, and very chaotic. “Hey, what’s up?” you asked, trying to hide your amusement. Chris’s face was a mixture of panic and exasperation. “I… I need help,” he said, voice low, as if trying to keep the situation under control. “What’s going on?” you asked, already knowing the answer. “Chloe won’t stop crying. I’ve tried everything. I gave her snacks, I sang her favorite song, I even put on the show she likes—nothing’s working! And Nico is jumping off the couch while Sienna is pretending to be a scientist and mixing random things in the kitchen.” You could barely suppress your giggles as you heard Nico’s excited voice shouting, “I’m a superhero!” in the background. Meanwhile, Chloe’s cries only seemed to get louder. You held back laughter, trying to keep your tone calm. “Okay, okay. Deep breath, Chris. Here’s what you do—try giving Chloe her stuffed bear, the one she can’t sleep without. It usually calms her down.” Chris ran a hand through his hair, his face scrunching with frustration. “I tried that. She’s still going off. And Nico won’t stop—he’s about to break something!” You couldn’t help it anymore. You laughed, a genuine laugh that rang out over the phone. “Chris, you’ve got this. Just breathe. Let me talk to the kids.” You put the phone on speaker and called out to the kids. “Nico! Sienna! Can you listen to Daddy for just a minute? He’s trying really hard!” “Mommy!” Sienna’s voice rang through the phone, and you could hear the excitement in her voice. “Daddy says I can’t mix the kitchen stuff!” “Yeah, because you’re not a scientist, Sienna,” Chris added with a sigh. “I swear, they’re out of control tonight.”“Alright, alright. Just tell them to give you a few minutes,” you said, trying to suppress another laugh. “I’m sure they’ll calm down.” Chris rubbed his temples. “I’m gonna lose it, I swear.” You could hear Chloe’s cries start to fade slightly in the background as Chris quickly retrieved the stuffed bear, probably following your instructions. It only took a few moments before the sound of Chloe calming down reached your ears. “There, see?” you said, grinning. “Just give it a minute.” Chris looked at you through the phone, his expression one of disbelief. “You seriously have a magic touch. She’s quiet now. Nico is pretending to be Batman, and Sienna’s cleaning up the kitchen… I don’t know how you do it.”“Years of practice, babe,” you said, smiling warmly. “You just have to stay calm, and they’ll follow your lead. But hey, if you need me to come home early, I’m just a call away.” Chris raised an eyebrow, a sheepish grin forming on his face. “I think we’re good now… but I don’t know if I can handle another night like this. Maybe next time you could plan a night out while the kids are asleep?” “Yeah, maybe,” you teased. “But you handled it. I’m proud of you, Dad.” “I’m not sure I’d call it handling it,” Chris said with a rueful chuckle. “But I’m surviving.” You gave him a reassuring smile, knowing he was doing his best. “You’re doing great. I’ll be home soon. Just remember—if all else fails, put on their favorite movie and let them burn off some energy.” “Got it. Thanks, babe.” As you ended the call, you chuckled to yourself, thoroughly entertained by the chaos at home. It had been nice to get a break, but honestly, you couldn’t wait to get back to your little family and see how Chris was holding up with everything.

[minijenn]

That feel when you spend the past several days drawing for a forgotten niche AU you created years ago that you've just been having severe brainrot for lately and you have to get it out of your system somehow so you just... draw.

Anyway, Thorn in the Gut AU! Perhaps the most angsty little AU my brain ever did create back in the old UF days, I'm still quite fond of it. Its just chock full of drama, conflict, existential crisises, all that good stuff! And so, for those of you not in the know, here's a whole dump of info about it to go along with the art! (copied most of this from Discord so excuse any wierd formatting)

The basic gist of Thorn in the Gut spawns out of RMD (Rifts/Memories/Dimensions) and basically starts when Bill lands a practically fatal blow on Stepper (instead of cracking his Gem) and Steven, realizing both he and Dipper won't survive this, essentially "poofs" (lets his physical body disappear) and sacrifices his gem over to Dipper to keep him alive. Anyway, Dipper winds up back in Gravity Falls alone, much to the alarm and anger of the Crystal Gems especially when they realize Steven is basically dead (not them blaming a literal child who had no say in any of this). From there, the following ensues:

The Gems are A Wreck but they are still deeply attached to that gemstone (because of Steven and because of Rose) and they really don't know how to interact with Dipper now as a result; eventually, they force him to move up to the temple because he very quickly starts showing he has Steven's powers now but he can't control them because he is also A Wreck with survivor's guilt and grief over losing his boyfriend (did I mention this AU is Stedip? Well its Stedip) and his heavy emotions are making them wonky

They also watch him like a hawk because they think Steven could somehow return at any moment; they're also just like, hella impersonal with him; basically any sort of warmth or goodwill they had toward him has completely evaporated and they just view him as "the reason why steven is gone"

Garnet probably just... never talks to him like ever. Pearl is a sobbing wreck but is also surprisingly the most sympathetic towards Dipper out of the Gems (bc she knows about Rose and Bill's history to a certain extent and also knows thats at least in part why Bill attacked Stepper so viciously and why all this happened in the first place). Amethyst is just mad and probably prone to verbally lashing out at Dipper in frustration the most.

Stan and Ford are Fighting obvs bc Ford thinks Dipper staying with the Gems is for the best (also not Ford also kind of lowkey starting to negate his own nephew as a "fascinating breakthrough discovery" because of how scientifically impossible what's happened to him should be; Stan, meanwhile, is furious at how both Ford and the gems are acting, he's one of the few people still entirely in Dipper's coner, along with...

Mabel, who while mourning Steven herself wants to be there for her brother so badly but can't be because the Gems and Ford won't let her be, claiming that its for her own safety when really its just to keep her out of the way of a very delicate situation; even so, the twins still try to see each other as much as they can and comfort each other however possible (potential eventual fusion between the two?? maybe)

Connie is fucking mad, mad that Steven would sacrifice himself like this, mad that he'd sacrifice himself for Dipper, mad that Steven is gone and she can't do a damn thing about it. As a result, she distances herself from both the Pines and the Gems for a good long time to grieve on her own (but even after she comes back around, things remain hella tense between her and Dipper)

Other characters: Lapis is fuckin squicked the fuck out by what's happened here, because something something its comparable to permenant fusion, but even so she tries her best to support Dipper even though its difficult for her; Peridot is kind of lost in the shuffle of all this, like Mabel, so I feel like that's where she's lending most of her support; Pacifica? ehhh I mean this AU works under the assumption that Stedip is kind of the only currently canon MK ship so she probs wouldn't have much to do here 😛

Fucking forgot to talk about Dipper himself you know like he aint the damn focus character; so he's in Shambles, emotionally distraught for a number of reasons; his boyfriend is gone and he can only speak to him in his dreams (and those dreams are usually sweet… until one certain triangle starts showing up in them); amidst still reeling from losing Steven, the way the others are all treating him leads him into an existential crisis, because to the Gems, he's Steven, he's Rose, to Ford, he's an experiment, to Bill, he's an obstacle in the way of a prize, to the diamonds (if this continued on into UF2 which it could), he's Pink, and with all that in mind he truly starts to wonder if there's anything really left of Dipper at all

And the bad guys; Bill is furious, obvs. it doesn't take him long to start showing up during Steven and Dipper's little dream chats, causing all sorts of chaos and being just a general bastard all around; but he wants that gem, he has a deal with White to make good on after all, and he's determined to do whatever it takes to get it, even if he has to guilt trip Dipper into ripping it out of his stomach himself (which may or may not happen); as for the Diamonds I mean they'd probably just think this is "Pink" playing another one of their silly games, like they think about Steven so not a ton changes on that front? (even still, I summed up that this boy is in Danger in the span of time that would be UF2 in that one art)

Oh and of course, Steven's status. He is… aliveish? Of course, he doesn't have a physical body anymore, kind of gave that up entirely when he "poofed" bc he's half human. At first he's only able to communicate solely to Dipper through his dreams (and like Stan and Mabel, Steven is completely in Dipper's corner and is fucking mad as hell about how the Gems are acting towards him). And eventually, he makes that frustration known by using his possion powers to take control of Dipper (which Dipper allows, god who cares about past trauma, anything to make the Gems see reason) to tell the Gems off, but he isn't able to do that for very long or very frequently. I'd like to think Dipper can also sometimes "hear" Steven speaking to him through his thoughts when he's awake too. Basically, Steven is always with him ^_^

After getting steven's gem, Dipper maintains Stepper's hair color and skin hue :3 and he also starts wearing Steven's shirts bc fuckin gay grief compells him to wear his BF's clothes and then the Gems, fucking freaks that they are are like "nah you should keep wearing them" even when he doesn't want to anymore. Oh! and another thing, Dipper doesn't see himself when he sees his reflection in the mirror, he sees Stepper (represented in the art).

Since Dipper has to stay in Gravity Falls (because how the hell is he able to leave with all of these newfound manifesting magical powers), Mabel ends up going back home alone with a spare memory gun Ford gives her in tow. She remorsefully uses it to erase Aaron and Allison's memories of Dipper so they won't ask questions she isn't able to give answers to :3 Also, Dipper is unaware that this happens until some point in UF2 when Mabel breaks down and tells him. Suffice to say it basically ruins whatever is left of his relationship with Ford (not that it was good at that point anyway because well, Ford is basically using him as a lab rat)

Basically, without Steven around, most of the cast is just... fucking not acting right bc steven was basically their moral compass so they figure why even try anymore without him around (the gems and hell even dipper included, he makes some pretty questionable decisions in this AU himself)

Just, its all about identity, really, about how the way others around you treat you can impact how you view yourself for better or worse (in this case, worse); it's about loss of agency and how grief can drive people to act in some... pretty terrible ways.

Anyway yeah that's a Lot but its my current obsession in the In Between time of S1 and S2 and I figured I need to chase my bliss (bc how else will I cope with The Horrors if I don't put my favorite blorbos through Horrors of their own. Expect something to be written from this AU... eventually idk man probs not anytime in the immediate future tho lol it's just a silly fun little side thing. Anyway enjoy the Pain! ^_^

[louisisalarrie]

I am relatively new to this fandom and I am already struggling with some things and I was hoping to get some perspective in the midst of feeling a bit discouraged. Do you ever struggle with admiring these artists who you know are lying to you and basically using manipulation tactics with the fandom? I have empathy for what these guys have gone through and can’t even imagine, especially so young. But especially with Louis, realizing that the Larry fans have stuck with him through so much and even through bbg (the ones who saw it for what it is), to just continue to be fed crap and seemingly pitted against other fans is just exhausting. And beyond a great super expensive concert, Harry seems completely disconnected and checked out. Concert Harry and public Harry are two totally different people (probably neither actually the real Harry) because of narratives and marketing and it just seems like everything is meant to be dissected and figured out and nothing is probably what it seems. And it really sucks to completely believe these are really great guys and believe that the situation is way more complicated than I can ever understand, yet still like I am just being fed bread crumbs that are supposed to be appreciation. I know as fans we are not owed all of them and they are absolutely entitled to a private life, but it just feels a bit like say nice things when we are convenient and spending money to attend shows and buy albums and leave us to deal with all the bullshit that goes with it on our own. Does this make any sense? I feel like it may sound a bit dramatic but it has been a long day :) I am just wondering if I am alone or being way to parasocial in sometimes feeling like this.

Heya!! no you’re not alone in this at all. And welcome to the fandom! <3

A lot of larries left when bbg happened. a lot of folks stopped tapping into any theories of Larry because like… it was harming their view on the boys and draining them of energy more so than just being part of the fandom which is meant to be a happy community supporting our faves. The disgust and clear closeting and stunts we’ve watched these boys go through just… makes my heart ache for them. But I can understand the frustration because it’s like… why can’t they do anything about it? Why are we still being lied to? When will it end? Why can’t I just enjoy my fave’s music without all this extra stuff on top of it?

And that is probably one of the biggest things about ending stunts is that you feel lied to. You’ve been sold a story for no other reason than money. You’ve been presented with this “authentic” image but really…. There’s more to it. It’s frustrating. Authenticity is just such a massive thing for artists these days. I know I keep hammering on about it but fr, it’s one of the best things an artist can do for their image, and for their wellbeing.

Rest assured though, we’re standing by their sides. We’re shouting from the rooftops. We’re reading laws and contracts and digging right in and learning and sharing info and it’s sooooo fucking cool. Obviously, a horrible circumstance, but do you know how many larries I got to know during 1d who now work in music? or are very well read in entertainment law and want to make a change? or are inspired to create safer spaces in fandoms? it’s a really cool thing off a very bad situation. but nonetheless, we have a community here, fighting for them.

Ending these stunts is no easy feat, either. It takes a lot of paperwork and a lot of damage control (depending on the story you’re going for), and a lot of convincing and maintaining relationships and losing money etc., and while artists are better without it… it’s just always gonna be there, one way or the other.

Larry was, and is, such a massive curveball to the industry. While yes a lot of artists have been closeted over the years, Larry was major in a turning point because of the fandom, the rise of social media (those two boys having access to their accounts and being sickly in love), and the rise of a different artist to fan relationship. Everything was recorded, gifs were made, we could directly message/tweet the boys, it was just… such a massively wild time, so the closeting came down really hard because it was unprecedented. SC was in entirely new territory, freaking out because they weren’t really aware how to take on alll these fans + social media. It was a mess. He panicked.

And every famous person has an image, a brand. It’s again, that fight on authenticity that people are yelling for now more than ever. Down goes the days of a whole fandom accepting something for what it is - we see through the bullshit, but it won’t just end. It makes money.

Anyway, it’s shitty but I’ve been here for a million years now and I, personally, can’t give up. I see a lot of yucky things in this industry firsthand, and when this all comes out, everything changes.

[rouge-fauna]

I’m sorry I swear I was planning on moving on but then I had a conversation with my friend last night and now I’m triggered again… I don’t mind if people disagree but damn it was really frustrating, for a few reasons, one of them being that even if I’m biased I still think I’m a better source of information and opinion after having watched 12 hours of streams versus some reaction channel videos. Like sure I like Dream and relate to both c and ccDream but I’m not heartless or unreasonable. I’m not saying, ‘oh my poor autistic dweam can do no wrong.’ I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m here for the facts and truth and what it says and what is reasonable based on that. I’ve dropped plenty of other YouTubers for doing messed up things, and Dream would be no different if he actually did cross a serious line. But honestly I don’t think he’s really done worse than plenty of other creators and at least he has apologized which is more than you can say for most others. So by all mean hate him for whatever reason, there are plenty of YouTubers I dislike, but don’t do so because you think he’s a creep or because of things that just aren’t true, and give me a little more credit that I’d not just support anyone or use autism to justify anything.

The reason I’ve talked a lot about the autism and ADHD is because I feel like it is very important. But my friend (who is also autistic), last night was giving me a lot of shit for it, noting how autism doesn’t excuse behavior and is beside the point. The thing is though, this situation is not like how people are saying Elon doing the salute is an autistic oopsie, no I’m literally just pointing out actual statements and points the content creators have said about why they dislike Dream, which are literally characteristics of his neurodivergence. Look no further for an example than what Jack says in the podcast, “I genuinely think he lacks the ability to read social queues.” That’s literally just autism 101, I’m not making excuses for behavior, I’m just pointing out the why a behavior is happening to say it’s not because he’s some evil bad manipulative guy. Tubbo is the one who noted that Dream’s behavior was weird and inappropriate and how he didn’t seem to understand the social rules and stuff. Those are actually things that have been talked about here. People have actually commented on how Dream’s over explanation and stuttering and repeating himself and such is manipulative and all I’m saying is no it’s literally just AuDHD. I’m not making stretches for behavior here, I’m not extrapolating here on what Dream did, if anything I’m focused more on the actual comments of the opposing side.

Autism isn’t relevant to the situation because of the meme. It’s no longer about whether or not he is allowed to use the r word because he is autistic, it’s about this inherent loathing people have where a lot of their listed reasons are typical ADHD and autism characteristics. All I’m doing is looking at what they themselves said, I don’t even have to theorize, Jack straight up just said he thinks Dream lacks social queues as part of his discussion on why he dislikes Dream. What do you mean his neurodivergence isn’t relevant, when the reasons people are currently bashing him are neurodivergent traits. That’s like saying, well her blue hair is irrelevant to the conversation - well then why do you hate her? - because I don’t like how she always dyes her hair. Heh? It is relevant because the things the hate him for connect directly to autism and ADHD, it is relevant because the internet is making fun of him after that stream with Tubbo for how he speaks because of his neurodivergence. It’s relevant because the reason people believe these rumors or spread rumors in the first place is because of the inherent dislike of autistic people they are literally describing on air.

[chosove]

18+ mdni | tutoring toru :)

tw. mentions of A&P I ☹️ anatomy and physiology … my enemy …

pairing: satoru gojo x f!reader

“lets go over that one more time, ‘kay ‘toru? you have to use the scientific wording to actually be correct. its not ‘spongy stuff’, its trabeculae.”

you didnt realize how exasperated your voice sounded until you saw the man before you deflate, a pout forming on his pretty pink lips. “i dont get what i said wrong this time” satoru exclaimed, head falling to the table in frustration. “you asked the difference between compact and spongy bone, right? spongy bone is like…spongy looking. so i didn’t say tabec… whatever- why does it matter?”

it took a lot of effort to suppress the chuckle fighting its way past your lips- seeing the prideful gojo satoru crumble over basic anatomy was too ironic to not laugh at. “how ‘bout we take a break?” you sighed, patting his head, feeling warmth bloom in your chest when his teary eyes peeked up at you. letting your hand fall slightly, you cupped his cheek, wiping at the wetness forming on his lower lashes. did he always look this good? how were his eyes suddenly so intense, and how on earth do his lips look so soft? so red? so kissable?

without thinking, your thumb traced satoru’s lower lip, pulling it from its place between his teeth and watching in delight as he let you press down on it. it wasn’t until he let out a soft pant, eyelids fluttering shut that you finally pulled your hand back, the guilty look painting your face making it seem like you’d just been caught doing something much, much worse.

god, how satoru wishes that were the case.

jumping back, you brushed your hands off on your shirt before turning to him once again, his wide eyes watching your every move. “h-how about we finish there today, hm? you seem tired so-“

before you could finish, his hand shot up to grab your wrist. “no!” satoru nearly shouted, clearing his throat when he saw you jump. “s-sorry, i mean um…” his voice trailed off as he stared into your eyes, thinking of an excuse for you to stay and do something other than school.

satoru had been crushing on you ever since the first day of biology, the way you smiled when he asked what your professor meant by homeostasis melting his heart- he was closer than ever today and he couldnt lose that momentum.

“maybe we could focus on something else?…” you watched his adams apple bob before he continued, nerves evident in the way his voice began to tremble. “m-might help me memorize stuff better if i have a real figure?”

if it werent for the fact he was your favourite client (who also paid the most), you would’ve said no. you probably shouldve said no, but god he really did look like he was about to pass out just from voicing the request- what would he look like when you showed him all the spots he was most sensitive? did he already know them?

Before you could think too deeply on it, you responded with a nod. “not really comfy down here though…how about we go up to your room?”

A deep blush painted his cheeks as he grabbed your hand and led you up the stairs to his room, sitting shyly on his bed with his hands in his lap after opening the door. You giggled at the sudden change in his mood- he wasnt all that confident when he first asked you up here, but did he even wanna go through with it?

Standing before him, you dragged a finger across his jaw, slightly lifting his head up to look at you. “We can always go back to studying ‘toru, I dont mind.”

He didnt know if it was the way the nickname rolled off your lips or the implication that something that wasnt school was actually gonna happen, but he shook his head rapidly and wrapped his arms around your thighs regardless- relishing in the giggle you let out as you placed your hands on his undercut for stability. “N-no please, i mean…we haven’t done a lot of studying on the actual anatomy part right?”

It should be a crime how irresistible gojo satoru can be even when using biology to flirt. “Guess you’re right ‘toru, how about we start with…” your voice trailed off as you moved to sit atop his lap, the sight of his eyelids fluttering shut when your crotch rested just above his making your stomach flip with excitement. “D’you remember what I said these were called?” your sweet voice questioned, dragging his hands to rest on your breasts.

A deep groan fell from Satoru’s lips, his head falling forward to rest between his hands as they groped your chest. “Y-yeah fuck they’re mammary glands right? ‘S where the milk c-comes from”

You giggled at his neediness, his hips jumping up while talking about milk only making you cockier. Ripping your shirt off, you tilted his head up once more to look into his blown out pupils. “Feeling thirsty ’toru?”.

His blown out pupils watched with excitement as your hands reached behind you to unclip your bra, a sigh of release falling from your lips as the tension of the bands washed away. Without another word, satoru pressed a kiss to your left nipple, watching the way the sensation caused it to become erect. You gasped before pushing his head closer to your chest, craving his mouth to be on you anywhere and everywhere.

“ish th-this okay?” His muffled voice spoke as he suckled on your tits, desperately flicking his tongue against the nipple before gently biting it, slowly rocking his hips up into you each time he did so. Your fierce nods in response only goaded him on, his hand going to your other breast so it wasnt neglected, fingers busying themselves by pinching your nipple.

“Shit toru…ngh doin’ so good, ‘m so wet for you”

Before you could get any more words out, you heard a whine of what sounded like your name against your chest followed with a deep, rumbling groan, Satoru’s hips jumping up in reflex as he came in his pants. “F-fuck ‘m sorry hah jus’ wanted ya for so long n’ youre so pretty f-fuck ‘s still comin-“

What felt like eternity of gojo satoru licking and kissing your breasts as he creamed himself was finally over after nearly 3 minutes, his hands going from harshly grasping your tits to simply resting them atop them. You waited until he rid out his orgasm to make any movements, hands beginning to push him away before you were grabbed by his muscled arms.

“Ya didnt finish…i have to do the reproductive system next ya know…gonna need to know more than just youre mommy milkers”

[bring-forth-his-sac]

Not sure if this is too far but maybe some dads best friend mixed in with close calls and very rough stuff if ya know what I mean 😏

Stained

Word Count: 7.4k

Warnings/Tags:  rough sex, degrading name calling (slut), mentions of a facial, cheating (soz Lucille), alcohol consumption, hair pulling, semi-public sex

It happened again.

By now, Negan knows the routine. Argue. Say shit neither one of them can take back. Lucille kicks him out or else Negan reaches his limit and storms out. Make up later. It’s their pattern.

But tonight is different. 

They were supposed to go to a friend’s house for dinner, which threw a wrench in their usual routine. A part of Negan still wanted to go. Sure, he dreaded the tension-filled conversation, Lucille throwing in her usual passive-aggressive digs, but there was a silver lining: he could vent afterward. He needed to. To someone who’d actually get it, without the sugar-coating.

Negan has been friends with your dad for years, long enough to know they could trade a few sharp words and move on without it turning into some dramatic scene. Sometimes, Negan could really use that kind of blunt, no-nonsense talk with another guy. 

But hell, he wouldn’t mind shooting the shit with you either. You always got his humor and honestly, you were the only one who could make him laugh without trying so damn hard.

Instead of your home, he finds himself at a bar. Lucille was quick to call dibs on going solo to your parents house, not wanting to deal with Negan in front of friends. 

He left without another word, driving to the local watering hole like a man on a mission.

The bar is the usual kind of dimly lit place that doesn't ask questions. Negan doesn’t need questions tonight. What he needs is a drink and a distraction.

He settles onto a chair by the bartop and orders a whiskey, the burn of it going down smoother than he expected.

Lucille’s parting words echo in his head, the sharpness of her dismissal stinging all over again. The way she had shut him down so easily, almost like telling off a child. Negan can feel the frustration creeping back in. He could’ve used a laugh tonight but instead, he’s stuck here. 

Alone, as usual.

On a typical night, Negan hates how quiet the bar is. He can’t stand silences, everything about it gets on his nerves. The patrons are too tight to even cough up a quarter to play a song on the jukebox. It always feels like the kind of place where the air is thick with nothingness and every minute stretches on longer than the last.

Negan doesn’t have the luxury to brood over that on this particular night. Instead, the loud chattering of a group of girls fills the bar, cutting through the silence like a chainsaw.

Just a handful of them crowd around a table, all bright-eyed and wide smiles, laughing as though the weight of the world hasn’t yet found them.

His brow furrows as he watches them out of the corner of his eye. They’re not doing anything wrong but the racket they’re making feels invasive in the normally subdued space. 

Every time they laugh, the sound hits him like a hammer to his skull, ringing in his ears. It’s like a constant, steady hum of disruption. Negan can appreciate a little noise and some new life in the place, but tonight?

Tonight, it’s too much. It’s frustrating him. He takes another swig of his whiskey but it doesn’t quite block out their high-pitched, frantic laughter. 

One of the girls spills a drink, and the others burst into a fresh round of giggles, the kind that seems to echo through the entire room. 

He’s about to look away when another girl quickly picks up the drink and continues to say something. She's sitting across from the others, leaning forward and talking animatedly, her hands flying through the air with each word. 

One of her hands subtly goes to her thigh and she tries to discreetly yank down her dress. 

Negan wonders if women know they don’t need to wear tight mini dresses or the crop tops to get laid. But he supposes that’s the joy of being a  youngster. They do stupid shit, wear stupid shit, drink stupid shit. Some grow out of it while others still say stupid shit and end up drinking alone at a bar.

His eyes flicker over her figure. Negan can’t see her face, the angle of her head and the way her body is half-turned away from him hides it. 

Negan doesn’t mind. He can still appreciate her thighs and the curve of her ass from his seat at the bar. Her hair and back covers most of her upper body too so Negan can’t appreciate any titty action just yet.

His fingers drum against the bar and he catches himself, realizing that he’s staring. He quickly looks away, taking another drink of his whiskey as if the liquid will wash away whatever was just stirred up inside him.

In a way, Negan’s glad you’re not like that. You’re pretty without all the extra shit. Since elementary school, you've never been the type to crave attention or stand out in a crowd. Yet you're not the kind of introvert who keeps completely to yourself either.

You fall somewhere in the middle, comfortable with who you are without needing to put on a show for anyone.

There’s been plenty of times you’ve been the most entertaining thing to Negan at your parent’s dinner parties. He loves the witty remarks you toss his way and how you both quietly poke fun at the evening while the others remain oblivious. Those little moments are the highlight of his night.

But, of course, there are also those other times. When a careless comment from your father or mother hits a nerve and you retreat into yourself, disappearing into the background. Negan can always tell when that happens; the sharpness in your eyes dulls and the sarcastic remarks you usually offer him vanish. 

He wonders if you’ll be disappointed tonight, when it’s only Lucille who arrives for dinner. You make the dinners bearable for him but surely you reciprocate that feeling. Both of you are as thick as thieves in your own subtle way.

The woman he’s been checking out stands, saying one more quick thing to her friends before she turns and heads for the bar.

Maybe it’s because you’re already clouding his thoughts that seeing you in person hits him even harder. He’s imagined you a thousand times, with your quiet demeanor and the casual clothes you wear that make you almost invisible.

The mental image of you is so vivid, it’s like you’ve been etched into his mind… yet here you are, so different than that.

You do the same action that you did earlier, yanking down the end of your dress as it threatens to ride up your thigh. Negan lets out a gulp, not sure how he feels at the fact that he’s been checking out his friend’s daughter.

Turning back to say something to your friends, you let out a laugh as you clog along in your high heels to the bar. 

This is exactly what you needed. A night away from all your worries and stresses… and your parents. 

Besides, you're an adult now. You’re allowed to have fun! Whether that be crazy golf, drinking until you need your stomach pumped or smoking whatever. No matter how much guilt or pressure your parents try to put on you, tonight is yours. You’re no longer bound by their expectations. You can take a break from being the person they want you to be and just be.

Maybe that’s why the words “Lydia found out her boyfriend cheated so everyone was going to go over to hers and cheer her up!” came out of your mouth when you told your parents you couldn’t stay for dinner instead of “We all want to go out and down tequila shots!”.

Whether your actual reasoning would’ve worked or not, it doesn’t matter because they let you out with no more than a remorseful look as you left to help your heartbroken friend.

“Get more salt sachets!” a giddy Lydia calls out as you clip-clop up to the bar. 

You’re so caught up in your own little bubble of excitement that you barely notice the guy at the bar. You wait beside him, leaning on the counter and waiting until the bartender comes over. When you feel his eyes linger, you glance his way, wondering if you’ve found some fun for the night. 

You look over, pre-emptively batting your eyes lashes everything seems to slow down. There, standing just a few inches away, is Negan. Your dad’s friend. 

You freeze for a moment, excuses caught in your throat, as you realize that it’s not just the familiarity of his face that’s throwing you off. It’s the way he's looking at you. Negan’s expression is unreadable but the way his gaze lingers has a weight that catches you off guard.

You try to swallow the sudden lump in your throat. What is he thinking? How long has he been standing there? And why, of all people, did it have to be him?

You hate it. On one hand, you want to ignore him. Maybe give him a nod of acknowledgment before pretending like you’re not in front of someone you’ve known since you were a kid. 

But on the other hand, you know what Negan’s like and the last thing you want is for him to loudly draw attention to your… friendship? 

Ushering yourself closer, you hurriedly whisper “What are you doing here?!”.

Negan struggles to maintain his composure, forcing himself to keep his eyes on your face instead of letting them wander. 

“What am I doing here?” His jaw clenches as if readying himself to barrage you with questions “What are you doing here, dressed like that? Are you drunk? Do your parents know you’re here? I swear….”.

You scoff defensively, glancing down at the glass of whiskey in front of him. “Oh so I can’t go out with friends but you’re allowed to drown your sorrows?”.

Negan doesn’t even entertain your question, immediately waving it off. “That’s not the damn point,” he hisses “I’m not the one with my tits out and stumbling around a bar!”. 

He shoots some other patrons a glare as they try to eavesdrop, making sure they keep their eyes to themselves. You gasp, putting a hand on your chest. Maybe your dress is a lower cut than what you’d usually wear but your boobs aren’t about to pop out of the thing!

“You— you can’t talk to me like that!” despite how your face flushes, you stand your ground. You’ve always known Negan to be raunchy but not once has he ever spoken to you like this before.

"Can't talk to you like what?” Negan doesn’t give you the time to ponder that rhetorical question, crossing his arms as he continues to lecture you.

“You think you look appropriate right now? You think your parents would approve of this outfit?" his eyes narrowing dangerously.

“I’m out with friends, not at dinner with my parents!” You defend, deciding to add in your own jab “Besides, I thought you were at theirs tonight, having dinner with Lucille… not drinking alone”.

Negan can’t keep still. He’s too antsy, wanting to shake some sense into you but trying to stay cool in public.

With an elbow propped up on the bar, Negan points a finger at you “Watch it, before I haul your ass outta here”.

This is the closest you’ve ever seen Negan to real anger. Whenever he’s been at your house, it’s always been the aftermath of it you’ve witnessed. His sullen mood and Lucille’s small comments at him whenever the conversation allowed; both of them handling their simmering frustration in their own way. 

To not only witness his anger first hand, but to have it directed at you… you’re not sure if you want to pout or get on your knees right then and there.

You scoff, trying to seem unbothered. “Enjoy your drink, I’m going back to my friends,” you say it with just enough sass, turning to retreat back to your table.

You know it’s a pointless endeavour. 

Negan won’t allow it. And you know it.

His hand snakes around your upper arm, his grip firm but not painful. "Oh no you don't,” he tugs you back, urging you to face him again “we’re leaving. Now”.

You were hoping for a little more time here, a bit more back-and-forth, rile him up before hopefully breaking down those stubborn walls. 

“You can leave, but I’m not!” you snap, digging your heels in.

He leans in close, his anger flaring back to life as his voice drops into a dangerously low growl. “I’m not asking you, sweetheart, I’m telling you” the pet name slips out like a command, making something tighten in your chest. 

“You’re drunk, you’re dressed like a goddamn slut and you’re not staying in this bar another second”.

Is it bad you can feel the heat between your legs as he degrades you? How is it your dad’s friend, someone you kinda considered your own friend too, is calling you a slut so easily? And why does he keep trying to steal quick glances at your chest?

Heh, well, you know the answer to that last question.

Still, you play your part and you slap his arm. “Don’t call me that! Jackass” you say with a defiant huff.

His eyes widen but Negan doesn’t acknowledge the slap in the way you wanted him to. Instead of continuing to bicker, he grabs his leather jacket from the back of his chair and throws it on, his movements sharp. 

“Jackass?” he repeats, clearly not amused.

“Yes! You’re acting like a major jackass!” you fire back, though there’s a glimmer of amusement in your voice. 

Negan grins, that mocking, almost wicked smile spreading across his face as steers you away from the bar.

“Yeah, and you know what else I am?” he asks “The one dragging your drunk, barely dressed ass out of this bar before you make a complete fool of yourself”.

He starts tugging you toward the exit. “I had like… two drinks!” you protest, stumbling slightly to keep up.

But just as he’s about to drag you out the door, you use all the momentum you have to shove him into the door right next to the exit. 

The ladies toilets. 

Your friends giggle as you both disappear from sight, assuming you’re hooking up with the stranger. They’ve always known you have a thing for older men but little do they know who he really is…

Negan stumbles into the bathroom, his mind still trying to process how he went from the exit to somehow ending up in here instead. His brow furrows as he takes in the situation.

Before he can say a word, you speak, your voice steady but firm “Negan, I’m not leaving”.

He steps closer “Yes. You. Are. We’re leaving. Right. Now”. His hand shoots out to grab your arm, but you’re already one step ahead. You sidestep him, narrowly avoiding his grip.

“No!” you exclaim, more forcefully than you intended. Hoping to get through to him, you soften your tone, offering a sliver of vulnerability. “My parents don’t know I’m here… they think I’m just at a friend’s place” you admit.

Your words hang in the air, a soft confession of rebellion. But Negan’s response is as expected—he rolls his eyes, the action exaggerated as if he’s heard this excuse a thousand times before. 

“I don’t give a fuck if your parents ground you for a year!” He snaps, his voice low but intense “You’re not staying here dressed like that and acting like this”.

“Acting like what? Having fun?”.

His jaw clenches. “By acting like you’re only worth a quick fuck in the backseat of someone’s car,” Negan replies, the words carrying a weight that makes your stomach sink.

The insult stings, but you refuse to back down. With a small scoff, you shake your head and tilt your chin up slightly. “You’re telling me you didn’t do that when you were young?” you challenge.

Negan’s expression falters for a split second, his lips twitching as if he’s about to crack a grin but he maintains his steely expression. 

He exhales sharply through his nose, his stance stiffening. “I did it because I’m a guy,” he mutters, his tone clipped “so it’s different”.

“That’s misogynist,” you point out as you cross your arms, unintentionally making your cleavage more noticeable.

For a moment, you catch Negan’s gaze flickering downward before snapping back up to your eyes, his face strained. 

His lips press together in a tight line, his eyes briefly closing in frustration as he fights to maintain his composure. “Fuck, can you just…” Negan gestures vaguely at you “Cover up or something?”.

Without waiting for an answer, Negan turns away, running a hand through his dark locks. 

You let out a quiet sigh. “I didn’t bring a jacket,” you say flatly, not giving him the satisfaction of seeing you flustered.

He mutters something under his breath, too quiet for you to catch. With a dramatic huff, he whips off his leather jacket. “Of course you didn’t. On top of everything else, you want to get hypothermia too” His voice drips with exasperation.

Negan turns back to you, holding out the jacket, his eyes briefly look to your chest again before quickly darting back to your face, his bottom lip caught between his teeth.

You catch the slight pause, the way his gaze betrays him, but you choose not to acknowledge it— at least, not directly. You stare him down, not hiding the smirk plastered on your face. Then, in one swift movement, he practically hurls the jacket at you. 

“Here,” he says, the word a little too resigned.

Instinctively, you catch the jacket, but you don’t put it on. Instead, you hold it in your arms, letting it drape over them as you roll your eyes at his comments. 

“I’m not some delicate little flower,” you tease, your smirk becoming playful “maybe I like it rough”.

The words slip out without thinking, a little too flippantly, and you feel the heat rise to your cheeks.

Maybe those two drinks were enough to get you tipsy after all.

Negan’s eyes narrow at you and you can see the gears turning in his head. There’s a flicker of something in his expression. Maybe amusement, maybe disbelief, but before he can say anything, you catch the faintest hint of a smirk forming on his lips.

He steps closer, his imposing frame shadowing you as he leans in. “Damn, you’re something else,” he says, his voice thick with something you can’t quite place.

You’re not sure if it’s the alcohol or the overwhelming presence he has, but for the first time tonight, you feel a small shiver run up your spine. 

“Rough, huh?” His words are like a threat, his tone smooth and dangerous.

Before you can respond, his hand shoots out, and suddenly, he has a firm grip on your hair, tugging it just enough to pull your head back. 

“Ow! Negan!!” You whine, your voice a mix of surprise and irritation. Good job at proving you like it rough.

He loosens his grip, but his fingers stay tangled in your hair, holding you captive in his gaze. He stares down at you, his dark eyes boring into yours. 

“You think I don’t notice how gorgeous you are?” he murmurs, his voice low, almost possessive “But this? Telling me you like it rough? Tsk, tsk, tsk”. 

Your heart skips a beat at the admission, and your eyes widen ever so slightly. The words settle in your chest, warm and electric, and for a split second, everything else fades away. 

Negan thinks you’re gorgeous. 

You can barely process it but you don’t get a chance to let the moment settle. His fingers tighten in your hair again, this time with purpose. 

“There’s a difference,” he growls, his voice rougher now, “between making eyes at some random guy at a bar and teasing a man who actually knows what to do with you”.

You swallow hard. His grip on you, the way he towers over you, his scent— all of it feels like a pressure you can’t escape. You can barely breathe.

“And you…” You pause, testing the waters “You know what to do with me?”.

And then, possibly the most un-hot thing happens. A toilet flushes. The sound is loud and sudden, causing you both to freeze. It comes from one of the stalls at the end of the room and it’s quickly followed by the drunken shuffling of feet and a zipping noise. 

Without a word, you and Negan lock eyes, an unspoken agreement passing between you in that single, charged moment. 

“Shit,” Negan mutters under his breath, his hand still tangled in your hair, but now pulling you toward the nearest empty cubicle with urgency. 

“Ouch!” you whisper, batting at his hand and making him untangle his hand from your hair. You barely have time to shoot him a glare before he’s guiding you into the small space, his body close behind you.

Just as the cubicle at the end of the room unlocks, the lock to your cramped cubicle slots into place with a soft click.

For a moment, you both hold your breath. You’re pressed together in the cramped space, his chest against your back, your bodies flush together.

You hear the drunken patron stumble, mumbling something unintelligible as they turn on one of the taps and start washing their hands. You both hold still, waiting for the heavy footsteps to move away. Negan holds you against him, one hand on your waist to keep you close. 

Although that’s not the only thing that’s touching you. 

It’s hard not to notice the unmistakable press of his semi-erect cock nestling against the curve of your ass. It feels firm yet pliant, a promise of things to come. 

Turning your head just enough to look up at him through your eyelashes. He doesn’t meet your gaze, too busy zoning into some spot in the stall door as he listens intently to the patron outside.

His brow furrows just slightly, the lines on his forehead deepening as he focuses. You can tell he's strategizing, weighing up different excuses in case he’s caught in the ladies room. Negan’s lips are pressed together, a slight tension around them, but it's not a scowl. 

Deciding you want some attention, you press your ass back slightly. You hear a grunt.

“You’re not making this easy on me,” he huffs. You can feel the warmth of his breath against your neck as he looks down.

Through the thin walls, you can hear the drunk go on their way, their footsteps slowly fading as they stagger out of the bathroom. The door swings shut with a final, echoing creak. 

As if to prove his point, Negan moves his hips forward, forcing his erection against your ass. He’s harder than you thought and you shudder at the mere size of the thing in his pants. 

He makes a quiet, pleased sound against your ear as his hand trails up your waist, teasing passing the side of your breast before settling on the back of your neck. 

“Fuck, you're responsive…” He pulls back slightly, making sure you can still feel him.

“Is that a good thing?” you ask softly.

He chuckles, his voice low and husky. “It's a dangerous thing, darlin,” he squeezes your neck teasingly “Nothing good ever comes from being too responsive... unless you're trying to drive a man wild”.

“Maybe that’s exactly why I’m trying to do” you push back against him again, this time bending your body slightly to really accentuate your ass.

Except all that does is encourage your dress to ride up your thighs again, stopping just before your ass. Grabbing his leather jacket from your arms, Negan tosses it up on the stall door before moving to your thighs.

Negan isn’t a one to waste time, especially when it comes to taking advantage of certain situations. Bringing both hands down to your thighs, he helps you dress by tugging it up in one swift movement. You let out a gasp as the cool, thankfully air conditioned bathroom making the skin on your ass get goosebumps.

“Negan! I-“ you move to turn away so he can’t see your ass but Negan’s one step ahead this time.

 Looping an arm around your torso, he makes sure you keep the squirming to a minimum. With his other hand, he brings it down between your legs and presses a finger against your panties.

He holds you in place, bent at the hips and ass against his crotch. You can feel the dampness of your panties against your heat. The wetness seeps into the fabric, making it stick to the lips of your pussy. 

“Fuck me, you are soaked!” with no qualms about modesty, Negan swipes the tacky panties to the side and gets a feel of your folds himself. 

You stop a moan from escaping, not wanting to be too eager. "Goddamn, you're a sticky little mess, ain't ya? All wet and sloppy, just fucking dripping” he teases your hole, momentarily pressing a finger to it but never dipping inside.

Hoping to gain some control, you go to stand up straight. The thoughts of looking into his eyes as he fingers you is more appealing than your view being the wall of a bathroom stall.

But Negan isn’t as fond of the idea. The arm looped around you quickly makes its way to your back, forcing you to stay bent. You let out a scoff as the side of your face smushes against the wall. 

“Negan, what the fuck?” You whine, blindly throwing one of your arms back at him “If you’re gonna finger me, at least let me enjoy it!”.

“Nuh-uh,” he grabs your arm and presses it against your back, restraining you before he continues his exploration of your pussy “I get to decide how the fuck we do this”.

You quieten down when you feel a finger trace your folds, spreading your wetness around. “You this much of a slut for every guy or am I just lucky?” He asks, chuckling at his own thoughts “Your friends were cheering like this is a usual thing for you”.

Before you can reply, Negan plunges two fingers deep inside your dripping cunt, his thumb grinding against your clit. “I— ah!” You mewl, trying to give a coherent response “N-no, never!”.

Negan picks up his pace, loving how you give in, basically slumping against the wall. “See, doll, I want to believe you. I mean, I don’t know that many sluts that get this fucking wet from just a little grinding… it’s shameful, really” he curls his fingers to hit the perfect spot, making your squirm.

“But in saying that,” Negan continues, his breath hitting against your neck as he leans closer “I don’t know that many modest gals that wear something like this”. 

Deciding you know better than to repeat your mistake and move again, Negan takes his hand off your back and paws at your chest instead. But in true Negan fashion, he needs to up his antics.

Tugging down the low cut neckline of your dress, you hear a ripping noise as he pulls at the fabric and forces it down past your bra.

“Huh… surprised your modest enough to wear a bra” he comments, quickly rectifying the situation. Without warning, Negan roughly shoves the bra cups up, freeing your tits completely. "Fuck, look at these," he growls, appreciating the sight of your breasts spilling out. 

The fingers he has working your hole pause and retreat, much to your disappointment. You take the opportunity to turn around to face him, starting to feeling a crick in your neck from being smushed up by the wall.

“Asshole, you tore my dress“ your voice is laced with frustration, although that may be from how much you want him to stop teasing and fuck you already. 

With an amused scoff, Negan goes to hold up his hands in surrender. His fingers glisten with your juices. “I’m trying to be a gentlemen here, doll” he chuckles as he defends himself.

You fight the urge to cover yourself, knowing that’s what he’s waiting for. He wants to see that shy side, to see you blush and get flustered. 

You glare at him instead “How is this being a gentleman?”.

“Well, I coulda just ripped it clean off, but I left ya some dignity,” Negan smirks, crowding you again. You’re left no choice but to back into the wall, holding your glare as you look up at him.

“And I've fingered ya before fucking ya which is pretty damn noble” he adds, seeing you battle between staying annoyed and wanting to blush. You open your mouth to complain but a loud moan comes out instead as Negan pinches one of your nipples.

He thumbs your hard nipples, chuckling as they perk up even more under his touch. “Damn, always knew you’d have a good pair on ya," he muses “fuckin’ perfect”.

Negan doesn't hesitate, leaning down to engulf one nipple in his mouth. He sucks hard, letting his teeth graze the sensitive bud as he kneads the other breast roughly. Groaning around your nipple, he switches to the other, assaulting it with the same fervent enthusiasm. 

With a grunt, Negan grabs your thighs and hoists you up, pinning you against the wall with his muscular body. Your legs instinctively wrap around his waist, arms going around his shoulders.

Negan grinds his still clothed cock against your bare pussy, applying just enough pressure to make you whimper. 

The rough denim of his pants provides no comfort, each thrust of his hips pressing his erection directly against your sensitive clit. "You feel that?" He asks against your tit “Want you to beg for it, gotta hear ya saying it”.

You have no hesitation. There is no reluctance to beg for him, not when you’re this close to getting what you thought would always be a wet dream. 

"Please, Negan, I need it!" you beg, your hips bucking against his pants in desperate attempts to get friction. “I’ve wanted you for so long, to fuck me in my bedroom o-or on the dinner table! Fuck, anywhere! I don’t care!”.

That seems to convince him. Reaching down and fumbling with his jeans, Negan has his cock out in record time. He grips the base, stroking it a few times as he lines it up with your soaked pussy. 

The head of his cock presses against your entrance, the tip barely peeking out from between your folds. Negan slowly eases in, allowing you to adjust to his massive size. 

You writhe and moan against him, trying to keep your body relaxed as he enters you. Trying your best to keep eye contact, you let out a string of whimpers as he fills you completely. 

"Damn, I actually fit," he says, stretching you out in a way you’ve never felt before. Negan pulls out carefully, as if testing the waters before plunging back into your needy pussy with vigor.

"Holy fuck, even tighter than I imagined. Built for my dick, aren't you?" he grunts, starting to fuck you hard.

Each brutal thrust of his hips drives his thick cock deeper into your pussy, stretching you wide open. "Fuck, you're so tight it feels like my dick is splitting you in half. Love it. Fucking love it" Negan rambles on and grabs your thighs, spreading them as wide as he can.

"Fuck, Negan... you're so..." you try to speak "ah!”. It’s all too much in the best way possible. That delicious ache of being so thoroughly penetrated, the feeling of absolute fullness with each deep thrust.

"More... fuck me more..." your hips arch up to meet his thrusts, trying to keep up.

Negan angles his hips upwards, hitting that spot inside you over and over as he pounds into you. "Look at me," He growls, "Look at me while I break you in half with my dick. You like that? You like feeling so stuffed?"

“I-I've never been this full before…” you say with teary eyes.

Negan notices your body tensing and shuddering beneath him, your pussy walls starting to flutter wildly around his thick cock. "Holy shit, there it is... Your cunt's squeezin' me like a fuckin' vice. You gonna cum on my dick?".

The pressure is building to an unbearable point, your entire body trembling as your orgasm approaches. Your mind goes blank, unable to answer his question as he hits that perfect spot.

Just as your orgasm hits, Negan feels your pussy clamp down around him like a silken fist. "Holy fuck..." you gasp, back arching as pure pleasure courses through your veins. 

Your entire body quakes, inner muscles milking his cock as you ride out your intense orgasm. You dig your nails into his shoulders, legs trembling uncontrollably.

Negan grunts, fucking you through your intense orgasm with deep, deliberate strokes. He can feel your pussy spasming wildly around his shaft, coating him in your slick arousal. As the last waves shudder through you, he finally pulls out, his cock glistening with in the light.

He lets you stand for a moment but you legs are so wobbly, it’s difficult to support your weight after that intense orgasm.

Before you can even catch your breath, Negan grabs your shoulder roughly and forces you onto your knees. Your body complies in an instant, unable to fight against such force.

Your knees ache as they hit the bathroom floor but that’s the least of your concerns. You look up at him in wide-eyed shock, lips parted as you anticipate him coming all over your face.

"Fuckin' hell, such a pretty face..." He strokes his throbbing cock with his fist, ready to explode.

But instead of aiming for your face, Negan aims his cock at your chest, unleashing a thick, hot load of cum all over your tits. He groans loudly as he paints your breasts with his seed, the warm liquid dripping down between your cleavage and seeping into the fabric of your dress.  

“Next time you’re either swallowing it or you’re getting a facial courtesy of yours truly” he informs you, although the only piece of information you truly savor from that is ‘next time’.

Doing the gentlemanly thing, he grabs some tissue from the toilet paper dispenser and hands it to you. You dab at your chest, knowing the dress is a lost cause and will probably have to be thrown out later. 

“Help me up?” You ask, somewhat shyly once you’re done.

Taking your arm in a much more gentle grip than before, Negan helps you up, subtly looking over your chest to make sure you’ve wiped off all of him. “You feeling alright?” he asks lowly, as if remembering the public place you’re both in. 

You blink, giving yourself a moment to calm, your body still humming with the aftermath. “That was…” you pause, collecting your thoughts, “...wow.”

A soft chuckle rumbles from his chest, and he slips his leather jacket off the stall door. “Well, that’s a better response than I expected,” he says with a smirk, draping the jacket around your shoulders and gently guiding your arms into the sleeves. Without a word about how the jacket nearly swallows you whole, he zips it up, pulling it snug to cover your chest. 

This is a completely different side to the Negan you’ve seen tonight. This is the Negan that gives you a small, reassuring smile after your parents throw some off handed insult your way. 

The two of you stand close, your breaths mingling. Slowly, the space between your faces narrows, as if drawn by some unspoken pull. You gently tilt your head, just enough to bring your lips into alignment with his. 

The kiss is a tender brush. Featherlight and hesitant. It’s the kind of kiss you’d expect before going at it like a bunch of animals… not afterwards.

The kiss lingers, still tasting of warmth and something unspoken. Pulling back just enough to rest your forehead against his, you can feel the soft touch of his lips still tingling on yours. You mutter against his lips, almost sheepishly “Can you drop me home?”.

His lips curl into a quiet smile, a slight glint in his eyes as he nods. “Considering I didn’t get to finish my first glass of whiskey, yeah I should be good,” Negan gives you a playful look.

Unable to help yourself, you give him a small smile. It’s not as seductive or teasing as the ones you have given him previously. In all honestly, it feels like Negan has fucked the seductiveness out of you– if that’s even possible.  

“... So this wasn’t some drunken mistake?” you ask coyly. 

Negan wraps an arm around your shoulders as he unlocks the stall door and carefully guides you out. ”Wear a dress like that the next time I’m at your parents for dinner and you’ll find out” he replies with a smirk. 

Besides his tousled hair, Negan still looks fine. He’s not dishevelled or out of breath or having trouble walking… all things you attribute to yourself.

Negan notices your state too, keeping his arm around you as you subtly leave the bathrooms and head for the exit. If it’s even possible, Negan pulls you closer, guiding you out like a drunk that’s had one too many. His presence is possessive in the gentlest of ways.

You give your friends a knowing look as you both leave, one that says you’ll explain everything later.

The sound of drunken chattering and laughter fades as you step out into the night, the streetlights casting a soft glow on the parking lot. 

When you reach the car, he opens the door for you with a small smirk, his eyes never leaving yours as you slide into the seat.  A few moments later, Negan slides into the driver's seat and the engine rumbles to life. 

The car doesn’t even get out of the parking lot before Negan’s hand finds yours. The ride home is quiet. He doesn’t say much, and neither do you, but the silence between you feels relaxed.

Every now and then, his thumb gently brushes across the back of your hand like a quiet reassurance. He doesn’t mention the contact, simply letting it linger. 

 The soft, rhythmic motion of the car becomes like a lullaby and with every mile, the weight of the night lifts just a little more. Every so often, you glance over at him, his face relaxed. When your eyes meet, he offers a smile and you sleepily return it.

Negan doesn’t pull up directly outside your house. Strategically stopping his car a little down the street, he sighs.

“Hate to say it but I’ll need that jacket back,” he gives you a once over, as if to memorize what his leather jacket looks like on you.

Fiddling with the zipper, you mumble “So I’m supposed to walk in there with a ripped up dress?”.

He laughs at that, shaking his head before reaching into the backseat. “Here, I know it’s dirty but it’s the best I can offer,” Negan hands you a sweatshirt. 

The sweatshirt is faded, its fabric softened from years of use. The sleeves are slightly frayed at the cuffs and a few small holes hint at its age. On the front, several dark oil stains mark where hands have wiped off grease, probably from Negan when working on his motorbike. 

But most importantly, it smells like him.

As you take off his jacket and put on the sweatshirt instead, Negan gives you some privacy and looks away. “Are you coming in too?” You ask, gently placing his jacket on his lap once you’ve changed.

Taking that as his signal to look, Negan gives you a sympathetic smile. “Not tonight, darlin,” he replies “think Lucille would chop my nuts off with your mom’s fancy silver if I showed my face”.

“You two are fighting that bad?”.

Negan shrugs “Same old, same old”.

You try not to fidget with the frayed sleeves of his sweatshirt, not wanting to pick at it right in front of him. 

“And… this?” You focus your attention at simply inspecting the sleeves instead of picking at them “I mean, I know you said it wasn’t a drunken mistake but still… I get it if you wanna pretend like it never happened”.

As much as you wanted quick reassurance, you’re met with silence. 

Negan leans back in his seat, taking his eyes away from yours and looking at the street. Up ahead, he can see the porch light on to your parents house. Although, he doubts Lucille will be leaving anytime soon. She’ll probably stay late, try to wait it out until Negan has drank himself silly and fallen asleep.

“Tonight shouldn’t have happened,” he says with little emotion “It ain’t right. I know it. You know it. Hell, anyone in a ten mile radius would call me all sorts of names if they knew about it…  fucking your friend’s daughter is a whole mess”.

You stay quiet, unsure whether you should just get out now.

“But shit, if you wanted to suck my dick right now, I wouldn’t say no,” he chuckles “it’s a fucked up thing to say but I wouldn’t mind something like this happening again”.

That puts a smile back on your face. Getting ready to leave, you say “Maybe if you come to dinner next time, I will suck your dick”.

Negan watches you with narrowed eyes. Of course you’d be able to make his dick twitch again, making him feel like a teenager that could get it up over and over again. 

“I’ll hold you to that,” he warns as you get out.

“Good,” you hop out of the car, giving him one last flirtatious smirk before going “I hope you do”.

Closing the door, you strut along the pavement, your heels clicking as you go to your house. Walking has never seemed so hard, not only because of your shoe choice but from the aching in your gut and your legs wobbling more than you’d like to admit. 

Still, you try to do your best to walk straight, knowing Negan is watching. 

When you get to the front door, you give Negan one last glance before disappearing inside. He wait a few moments before starting up his car and leaving. 

The first thing you hear is a chorus of polite laughter from the dining room. Great, looks like they’re still in the midst of dinner. Before you have a chance to debate if you could get upstairs without them hearing, you hear your father call out your name.

“Is that you?” He calls out.

Reluctantly, you walk in, lingering by the doorway. Your parents to turn in their dining chairs to face you. Whereas Lucille has you right in her line of view. She offers you a gracious smile as you enter.

“I thought you were staying at Lydia’s tonight,” you mom says, eyeing your sweatshirt and what appears to be a skirt. Thankfully she doesn’t comment on how short it is.

“Eh, Lydia talked things out with her boyfriend so they’re back together again,” you lie casually “you know how they are; fight, break up and make up”.

Lucille casts her gaze down slightly, as if your words hit a little too close to home for her. You shift uncomfortably. 

“There’s some leftovers in the kitchen if you’re hungry” your mom says, blissfully unaware.

“I’m ok,” you give her a smile “I think I might just shower and head to bed early”.

“Alright,” she already waves you off, turning back in her seat “if you’re sure”.

You don’t linger, giving them a polite nod before leaving. It’s only when you turn to leave does Lucille look at you again. 

She’s never believed in coincidences. And she’s never believed you to be into repairing cars. She knows the faint stains on your sweatshirt, mainly because she’s the one who spent hours trying to scrub them out… only for Negan to reward her with new stains on the damn thing. 

Nodding along with whatever it is your father is saying, Lucille’s mind strays further and further from the dinner and to Negan instead. 

Something’s happened. What exactly, she’s not sure. But you’re involved and so is her damned husband.

—————

A/N: thought I’d put in a quick note just to say thanks for reading and apologies for disappearing all month! My family almost got scammed out of 11k (it was insane) but!! More importantly!! I got seriously bad writers block so apologies if this fic is a little choppy, I’m still getting back into my stride!!

[cookierunoutofideas]

Day 1 of "Writing SMC angst until he stops breaking my heart and comes home" (hopefully first and last)

So, after this post, someone sent me this ask in my main blog and I had an idea.

As usual, not beta read we crumble like cookies. Possibly OOC. Possibly crack. Cookies have human anatomy but made with cookie stuff. Fem! Reader. Making up random Cookie Run lore because I can. I am getting desperate, so pardon my lunacy, I just have terrible luck in gacha and need to let my frustrations out

+-+-+-+-+-+-+

"The DOG?!"

"Don't call him that!"

Shadow Milk Cookie can't believe his eyes. He can't believe his ears. He can't believe any of his senses nor his mind.

How did that happen? How did he not see it happening?

Shadow Milk knows for a fact that ever since the other half of his soul jam had awakened in the hands of another cookie, he has kept Pure Vanilla Cookie and his group under his gaze. Specially after Pure Vanilla Cookie somehow met (Y/N) Cookie, the one the Beast of Deceit has loved deeply since he first woke up in the Witch's baking tray, before he was even bestowed the Light of Knowledge, the two blinking confusedly at each other.

He had known, then and there, that they were meant to be together forever. It was like the Witches had baked them to fit together, almost as if they were originally one cookie dough that got separated in two. Even as he allowed the corruption—salvation to take over and transform him into something greater than the Witches would've allowed, his feelings for (Y/N) Cookie never once wavered. The joy he felt when Pure Vanilla Cookie finally did something good and guided him back to his beloved is simply too difficult to put on words.

She is as beautiful as always.

And so terribly close! He couldn't wait to finally break the seal fully and get back the life the damned Witches stole so he could finally reunite with (Y/N) Cookie.

So, then, why is she glaring at him? Standing there, at the Dark Side of The Moon, shoulders rigid and eyes piercing, (Y/N) Cookie proclaims that she has found someone else.

And it's a god damned CAKE MONSTER!!

"My love, what have the Witches done to your brain? Is this a joke? Must be a joke! Right? Right!"

"It's no joke, Shadow Milk Cookie. I have found love away from you and your lies," she crosses her arms, unamused. "Schwarzwälder is a sweet guy who treats me well. I'm very lucky to have him."

"You're enemies!"

"We were enemies. It was before Dark Enchantress Cookie abandoned her followers to covet the power of the Beasts."

"That– how–!"

"I don't need to explain myself to you!" (Y/N) cookie takes a step back and he can tell she'll soon manage to free herself from his influence. Shadow Milk Cookie remembers the days they spent training their magic together. "We are over, Shadow Milk Cookie! The next time we meet, it'll be on the battlefield, and you better hope White Lily manages to seal you before I crumble you!"

The connection severs then, the once warm and welcoming magic of his beloved now sharp and cold like a blade, and Shadow Milk Cookie is left alone in the dark realm of his own creation.

[dadrielle]

I am sorry my tags about the fire came across as accusatory or weaponized; that was not my intention. I thought the middle tag which you left off, #maybe they kinda wanna just chill rn, made it clear that I was just acknowledging there was an extra reason they probably didn't want to get deep this time. I was not saying that you do not care about the fires, nor was I saying I think that's why people asked the less deep questions. The reason I didn't put it in the post itself was in fact because as you said, it's not really relevant to a general critic of the show format. It just felt weird to me not to nod to the fact that that happened and was affecting the crew quite a bit, so that was me doing that. Sorry.

I am glad to hear that the post wasn’t intended to be about Cole. I did read some of your other posts before replying to this one, and I did also find the kids question cringe and unfortunate, cuz like, why does the gender of their kids matter even slightly? Gross, really. It was not obvious to me that this post was intended to only be about that, though, and I do think some of my points stand here, because when you say this (bolded emphasis mine on the second bit):

"the bleed over of fanon is depressing"

and

"a lot of you are showing your asses in terms of how you don't actually gaf about the characters or the story the players have chosen to tell."

it implies that you are talking about many things that you consider to fall into that category of fanon bleedover. Given that the kids question isn't even a fanon thing (as fanon is usually a thing a lot of people subscribe to) so much as one person asking a cringe question (to validate their individual headcanon), it is not at all obvious to me that's what you meant in the OG post.

And logically when follow that up with this in the same post:

"that's what you wanna ask about? it's selfish, honestly."

it sounds like you are also applying that to everything that fits into the category of fanon bleed over.

This is what I meant by splash damage. I am glad my assumption that this was about the glasses question was wrong but I don't think it is unreasonable to look at it and think that's what you're talking about. I do not think I was the only person who read it and thought that. If you say something is lame and that lame questions are selfish, people who ask questions you find lame are going to think you are calling them selfish whether that is your intention or not.

I dunno man, I tried really really hard to make it clear that I understand your frustration and share much of it, that I think it's valid to not like that kind of stuff in Q & As, and I tried really hard to provide context for what I was saying and to avoid coming across as super accusatory. I straight up just hate live Q&As as a thing, personally. Con Q&As make me wanna sink into the floor. Maybe my wordiness here is part of the problem; I know I overdo it when I am trying to be precise about what I'm saying. That’s a me problem. But I commented because we are in the same community and this felt harsh and I wanted to talk it out because that feels healthy to me. And now I know you did not mean this to be about Cole, so I do think that is a worthwhile thing to get out of talking directly. I did not respond because I'm hating on you; I did not say you're a bully. But if you are consistently having people say that they feel like you're coming for them when that's not your intention, I would consider whether you should try temper that brashness for the sake of clarity and not hitting people in the crossfire.

Anyway, yeah, if we wanna talk further, I do think DMs makes sense. I didn't actually see this second reblog until I had written most of this and I did want to clarify wrt to the tags publicly which is why I am posting this despite the DM invitation above.

I hope you enjoyed last night's episode. Have a good one.

I shouldn't be surprised by the fireside chat being the state it was, seeing as I don't follow any CR themed blogs myself or really go into the tags because I find it frustrating but still, the bleed over of fanon is depressing and a lot of you are showing your asses in terms of how you don't actually gaf about the characters or the story the players have chosen to tell.

I love my au's, I love my headcanons, I love my not quite canon ships, but they're for me and the people who chose to enjoy them if they want to. and what makes creating those things more fulfilling is trying to really be true to the character it's about, otherwise just go play with OCs

this will be my last salty post on the matter (guess we'll see) but man, the timing? all of this crazy shit is going on, it is well established that the audience is frustrated with how little downtime we've had with these characters and getting to see those long rest bonds we got to enjoy with previous campaigns, 4SD is over, and that's what you wanna ask about? it's selfish, honestly.

[savingthegeneration]

Hit a snag with my english princess crown playthrough. I just killed the dragon and after the Knights showed up I'm stuck on this screen. Everyone just stands there blinking. lol I'll load an old save and see if it happens again.

[lunarharp]

uhh another modern au agott follow-up. They've gotten progressively sillier

[moe-broey]

I've only read the first volume of Dungeon Meshi but I'm convinced Laios and Marcille are both autistic but two EXTREMELY different flavors of autism, so much so it enables autistic PVP (one sided, Laios is unaware, possibly due to the autism)