#it's really not now that i think about it. too late lol idc enough | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sizzlingpatrolfox · 1 year ago

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Im not that same anon, but i will say the way you jokingly talk like a taekooker can sometimes be triggering and hurtful to people like me who really love jimin and thought they curated their spaces to jimin focused accounts. Ive even seen taekookers use your blog posts in their arguments bullying jimin.

I’ve followed you long enough to know you’re being sarcastic but i do get sometimes triggered by how you try to prove Taekook in the exact way Taekookers do, a joke or not. but that’s our problem and you’re allowed to say whatever you want, and we can obviously unfollow you. Just adding my perspective.

- Allow me to give a honest opinion. I won't say you're a tkkr or anything because i know you're a ex jkkr and you don't ship jm with anyone. But from the way you write it definitely seems like you have alot of pent up anger towards jk and tae individually as well as together and that definitely reflects more into your writing when it involves those two. I think it's because you're an ex jkkr so it might be because feels betrayed by both of them on jm's behalf, like their behaviour towards him etc. Yes i myself recent the two guys the most and don't think they're worthy of jm's friendship too. Idk how long you have been on this blog but since the time i have followed you if i didn't know better i would think you're a jkkrs' hater more than of Tkkrs. It's one thing to to recent shippers it's another thing to turn it more towards just one group of shippers that is jkkrs. I remember you saying something like you felt betrayed or something about ITS tk talk cause even tho they said they're awkward it didn't show in their actions or something along that so i think you hate them both alot.

personally idc who you're calling husband or what cause all pjms call them husbands but they also think both of them are straight, would have unfollowed you long ago. I only replied cause i saw anons calling you tkkr. Anyways tk husbands married in Vegas currently with 3 kids and 3rd or 5th anniversary according to tkkrs. If you don't know they also has a shared apartment in japan jk brought for taehyung and he was staying there while jm was in hotel. Such a bad friend jk didn't even invite jm to come to their tk house 😔

---

Well, that I understand because taekook as a ship used to bother me just as much. It was annoying and sometimes it still is, tho it's become more of a dislike towards them as people rather than the ship itself.

In late 2019, there was some random poll in some irrelevant online magazine (like soompi and stuff) about "which member is the closest to Jungkook?". Jin won. Army voted for Jin and not Jimin, who was without a doubt the closest to Jungkook that year. At that time, things like that also bothered me and made me sad. Now, I guess it's been so long since I got over it and it's a joke. Besides, I understood that most of the information army picked up on was coming from the members themselves, and I couldn't spend a lifetime getting angry about things Taehyung, Jungkook and even Jimin himself weren't going to change.

That vminkook live in November 2021? Watching some parts of it felt terrible. I got over it quick, but at the time I didn't like it. A lot of taekook stuff bothered me, but what is anyone going to do about it lol. And I learned that, and I accepted it. Jimin literally posted taekook with their faces smashed together on his Instagram some weeks ago and pjms were laughing and rejoicing about him giving something to taekookers.

"Ive even seen taekookers use your blog posts in their arguments bullying jimin." Sorry but I don't believe you, like you just made that up.

Yeah but the thing is, I'm not trying to prove taekook lmao. I'm just making fun of the way shippers in general talk. Like, it would've meant the world to jikookers if it was Jimin with bam, right? They actually spent a lot of time trying to prove that Jimin is with bam often, but because it's Taehyung that has actual proof of spending time with Bam at Jungkook's house, they get annoyed at it and talk about conspiracy theories. Or ignore it. Now, Bam it's irrelevant. But if it had been Jimin, they would've also said the same thing I said about Taehyung spending time at Jungkook's.

And that's the whole point... call it satire if you will.

Before this discussion started, I was going through my blog, right. I reblogged some old posts. Remember when Jimin went to NYC and he wore shorts and jikookers were making viral sex jokes about how he'd shaved for Jungkook (Jimin is clean shaven in every BTS content btw, and so are the other members). Well, while going through my posts I saw this one where I said Jimin shaved and moistuzed his legs for Eunwoo like...

That stuff sounds out of pocket to me, and I will make fun of it. if people are missing the joke it's really not me. Or maybe they haven't been in shipper spaces as much as I have been. I'm sorry if I come across as too convincing??

Mind you, there were people who got angry because I talked about minimoni, or even about Saeon and Eunwoo. Someone literally came up once and told me that liking minimoni was weird because Namjoon talked about Jimin in a creepy and predatory way. Some people are just deranged, and I know that.

I honestly have no respect left for jikookers after face, or rather after this year, the way I have no respect for taekookers. They've become an easy punching bag with how delusional they were since 2021, and most of my jokes are me just saying the same things they say about jikook, but using it for different ships because it's all so ridiculous. And the most delusional ones are always Jungkook biased jikookers who thought Jimin was undeserving of support and talk about the two of them like Jimin is the lesser one in talents, ambition, or achievements.

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ribbonpinky-art · 1 year ago

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feeling melancholic and hopeless again. so im gonna just write out my emotions and none of it correlating. self pity post galore

im thinking about things. life is rough. so stressful. my mental illness is worsening by the day. lots of stuff happens behind the scenes that i choose to not talk about

and what im thinking about now, is that who was once one of my absolute comforts (junko).. im thinking abt that adorable little fumo plush of her i ordered several months ago is just sitting on top of my other plushies.. that i wasn't even excited to have her when she first arrived.

i didn't care.

and that hurt, knowing i didn’t, remembering how much she once meant to me.

same with my Chang’e. i want nothing to do with either of them now. they no longer bring me an ounce of comfort, only dread and remnants of a self indulgent story of kindness that once lifted me up. it all died. feels too idealistic. i feel like im too much of an outcast to let this story exist outside my private circles. i dont even want it anymore, or if i want to ever again

i think as of lately, focusing on oc’s (including ones i havent spoken of yet) has been better for my state of mind

doesnt help that im kiiinda only appreciated for my Junko works!!!! awesome!! i dont want to draw her anymore !!! fml!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! other people are better at drawing her than me anyway, ya wont miss me. lemme focus on my evil lady oc instead...

maybe im being melodramatic, and i do not care. perhaps in a few months i will be enamored with them again? idk. idc either

i feel more disconnected than ever to fandom, when i was seldom a part of any of it in the first place. im that person that exists on the outskirts, not really part of their community. im disconnected to people. i cant make connections with anyone, but i never could .. ok . i could, with a couple folks here and there. im grateful they want me around (not counting my partner of course, theyre the best thing thats ever happened to me. im not just lucky, im fortunate af we met at all)

im aware of my own issues- im autistic, im unmedicated when i probably need meds to regulate my emotions, i live in a toxic family. im triggered terribly easily, and when im hurt, it *hurts*.

i fear that, because of my strange way of speaking and how a lot of my conversations are stilted, and what i perceive as unusual behavior-- i fear i make other people creeped out/uncomfortable. irl or otherwise. like, maybe ppl will be friendly to me at first, but after a year and i dont say much anything and im just this creepy, quiet weirdo to them now. and thats so silly. whats creepy about me?? im a pint size thing who cant even look anyone in the eye very well. is that creepy?? ok, i struggle to talk sometimes, i might be uninterested in conversation but i dont want to be disliked for it-- idk ((ok i have “Creep” by Radiohead set in my mind because of my mental state, and its kinda funny to me for some reason)

i genuinely feel like i lack intelligence. i suck at thinking. i suck at thinking of words, remembering things, and the tiny mistakes i do make are SO small that it should be impossible to make the mistake in the first place. was i always like this? i feel like i used to be smarter , lol

i am quite literally, a complete failure in my family. i cant stress the truth in that enough. even my grandmother is disappointed in me and only wants to see a text message from me saying i got a worthy job in my field. that only thing that matters to anyone, my one and only point of interest in everyone i speak to in my life even outside my family, is that i dont have a real job. thats it. everyone is waiting for me to be.. someone.

because im no one.

but none of them have been a particularly positive influence in my life, seeing as im stuck here.

i genuinely feel disgusting for existing. my body feels wrong to be in when i am visible to any human being. perhaps even to any animal and bug, too. i dont want to be looked at, to be remembered by anyone who wont understand me

nothing is changing!!!!! and when it is, its worse than before!! why cant i just be brave and GO

not all of this reflects reality. i beat myself up a lot. mirrin knows it. i know it.

it hurts

#ribbonvent #tw i talk somewhat ableist towards myself. sorry #all in all... im just venting. take my particuarly heavy words with a grain of salt #i have a lot on my mind. this is only a portion of what stresses me #mirrin is helping me ground.. i love u mirrin

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ashen-laguz · 6 months ago

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OC ask meme for Yarilo and Ebony

🌨️🧠💔❗☔⚡🐰📓

sorry for lateness, work decided to get in the way

Yarilo

🌨️ - If this oc had a day free from all their responsibilities, how would they spend it?

Likely they'd spend a lot of time on a walk - partially to people watch, as they like seeing what sorts might be around, who might be interesting, or staying on top of what's going on and what might be new in the area~

But if not walking around or causing mischief, Yarilo likes to draw as well. Admittedly this is a headcanon I've picked up from other people's astarion-romancing tavs lol. while Yarilo's always found it relaxing to just absentminded doodle, in BG3 specifically they really started to pick it up more and get more serious about it after meeting Astarion, as trying to draw him seemed like a handy way to let Astarion see how he looks in some form. In spiralverse, Yarilo's one close friend back in Darkmoor was a vampire as well, and I absolutely think they picked up the habit to help her similarly, and now it's become something of a hobby for Yarilo.

🧠 - What is their stress response: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?

Usually fight. Yarilo doesn't get stressed easily, but their emotional response to stress or anxiety tends to be anger so they will likely lash out and fight until whatever is causing the stress is taken down or yarilo is literally forced to disengage. Hitting very specific nerves about their upbringing too hard could lead them to flight instead, but it's def not the norm

💔 - Does forgiveness come easily or with difficulty to this oc? Can they forgive others? What about themselves?

It depends on the situation - there's a degree of asshole-ness that Yarilo doesn't really see as 'bad enough to merit forgiveness' and thus would be quick to forgive because? I literally didn't care you did it? it was kinda based tbh. but if you think you fucked up then sure? i forgive you??? i guess???

Bur if you did actually upset them, then they will not forgive. They have been burned before and thus their trust is very easy to break and difficult to earn back.

as for themself.... they're not a very self-focused person? they don't really get happy or upset with themself about stuff in general, so. yeah they forgive themself easily cause they'll just brush that shit off before they even deeply think about it.

❗- What are the highest priorities to this oc (at a point in their life of your choosing)?

In BG3, their priority all game is literally just! Get this stupid worm out of my head! The game tries to bombard you often with "well do you wanna save everyone? do you wanna be evil?" and every time, without fail, for yarilo i'd pick the 'i wanna be free from the tadpole idc about the other shit' option. they just wanna feel like they fully have control over themself again. post-game, their priority is fully 'lets get astarion's vampirism cured!!!! wait someone said we should take responsibility over the vampire spawn we unleashed on the underdark? eh. nah. we're going on funney adventures looking for a cure :3"

in spiralverse, i think trying to solve the weird magic shit is honestly Yarilo's only real priority atm. They tried to escape Darkmoor for so long, and honestly, now that they've done so? they don't really know what they want after ravenwood. they're pretty aimless atm and are just jumping on this opportunity to not think about that.

☔ - How does this oc feel about rain?

There's not really any rain in the underdark on account of it being, well, underground. and with how Dead everything in darkmoor is, i don't imagine it gets a lot of rain to keep things more,,, alive lol. So regardless of the universe, I imagine it's very new to Yarilo, and thus they're just absolutely fascinated by it. First time they saw it on the surface/in ravenwood, they were TRYING to stay inside to draw but kept getting distracted looking out the window, and eventually just couldn't help but go around and just stand in the rain for way too long, just to see what it's like. (and inevitably catching a cold from doing so. this will not stop them from doing it again next time it rains.)

⚡ - Does this oc have any unusual or “irrational” fears?

Nothing particularly weird, no. They've got pretty bad arachnophobia but that's not exactly irrational or weird :p

🐰 - How huggable is this oc?

eh? they're an Ok hugger. not least huggable person, but they probably aint initiating it unless they're having a moment with a loved one.

📓 - Do you associate any quotes or lyrics with this oc?

"I died that night and killed god in the morning Left without a warning or even informing the coroner I was a foreigner Never belonged in that place, played along in that place Till I had enough of the games"

~ Needed a Change of Pace, Jhariah

i don't tend to associate specific quotes with ocs tbch, so finding something look longer then it should lol

Ebony

🌨️ - If this oc had a day free from all their responsibilities, how would they spend it?

Most likely, she'd just go out dancing. Once she gets tired, then she's sticking her nose in a book about death magic (or necromancy magic in the BG3 world) or maybe just spending time with loved ones.

...or at least those WERE her plans. But she saw a cute animal on the way to do so and that's her plan for the day now. Ebony's a simple lady lol

🧠 - What is their stress response: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?

Depending on the severity of the stress and the situation, usually either flight or freeze. Often there's the part of her that doesn't wanna run because if she is stressed, there is a problem that caused the stress and she needs to deal with it. but lmao her brain is fully shut down now and she doesn't know how to respond so she literally cannot respond.

but if it's REALLY really bad, or if someone else is really stressed, then fuck that actually - she's gonna get herself and the other person tf out of the situation.

💔 - Does forgiveness come easily or with difficulty to this oc? Can they forgive others? What about themselves?

Usually Ebony's quick to forgive others, yeah. She's no doormat so if it was something particularly bad she will be wary, but if someone seems genuinely remorseful then it's not fair to not give them a second chance. There's enough strife in the world, and if someone wants to admit they were wrong and fix their problems, then she's gonna give them the space to improve.

Exceptions will be made if someone seriously hurt a loved one tho. Sorry but if she knew how neglected Noire felt by Shadowheart for so much of act 2 in BG3, then Ebony would NOT be happy with Shadowheart! She's still pissed at Volo tbh. no comment bout mystra lol. If you hurt her family, her friends, loved ones, sorry but you did earn the ire of someone who is very difficult to earn the ire of.

She's much harsher on her own mistakes then anyone else's though, really bad at forgiving herself. She holds herself to such high standards that she thinks she really needs to hold herself accountable for even the smallest problems. ebony does not forgive herself

❗- What are the highest priorities to this oc (at a point in their life of your choosing)?

Honestly, throughout any adventure she gets stuck on, her priority is just Keep Everyone Safe. Whether that's keeping enough spell slots for heals in bg3, or buffing everyone so they can kill the enemies before the enemies hurt them in the spiral, or talking down conflicts before it gets out of control... She just wants everyone to be safe and happy. Thinking too much more in terms of that 'saving the world' stuff is gonna stress her tf out, and girl hasn't learned she can be a bit selfish so she's not rlly gonna be prioritizing her own desires while so much is on the line

☔ - How does this oc feel about rain?

She loves it!!! The second she realizes it's rainy, she's gonna put on some stompy rainboots and her cutest rainjacket so she can head outside, dance around in the rain! She loves the feeling of rain droplets hitting her and splashing in the puddles while she's moving around. And when she's done with that, nothing is cozier when you get dried off then curling up with a good book and a hot drink near the window and listening to the pitter patter of the rain outside.

She also tends to wind up giving herself a cold but it's worth <3

⚡ - Does this oc have any unusual or “irrational” fears?

Ebony's got a lot of anxiety in general, especially in regards to failure or not measuring up. I dunno if she has any specific ones that are weird though? She's moreso just eternally nervous about everything

🐰 - How huggable is this oc?

The most huggable. Please hug her. Or just wait for her to hug you first, because she will. The most physically affectionate girl you will meet.

📓 - Do you associate any quotes or lyrics with this oc?

"But surely there’s a bud that struggles yet to bloom, it’s Bound together and barely breaking. Oh what a fool, a tragedy!"

~ Will Stetson's english cover of Kyu-kurarin

#disneydreamlights #ask the trashbag

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seongminiz · 7 months ago

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omg screaming icb i forgot about woobin’s boobs yes pls his body😫 i’m such a whore for everyone in cravity plsplss

i hope u have fun seeing them!! i bought tickets for p1h recently cuz i’ve always liked their music but i never really followed that closely but they’re performing near me and tix are decent and now i’m so excited to deco my lightstick and put together my outfit hehehe kpop concerts are so much fun and i wish there were more of them near me,,, i also wish i had ppl to go with too though because i saw enha in new jersey last year (i live in canada) so i flew there all by myself to see them😭 and i’m gonna be seeing p1h by myself too :((( ik other ppl are just being more responsible with their money but i’m sad because my friends said they’d want to see p1h and they’re gonna be so close (literally in the same city as one of my friends) and they still don’t wanna go😭

omg i rambled so much. erm. thank you. do u have a bias in onlyoneof yet? and are u a lightstick person(sorry if this is a rly silly question) like are u gonna get their lightstick for the show? i always pretend idc about lightstick but then i’m like i neeeed it i need the little accessory and a little poca holder with my bias in it for the concert like idec if my seats are that good i just need to be the cutest stan there

i think i might’ve had too much caffeine this morning. i hope your day is going well!!<333

- 🧁 anon

the real question is who isnt a whore for cravity tbh

god i wish p1h came to my country 😭 they came to europe already but im trying to save up so the only groups im willing to travel for rn r cravity n maybe tbz since they r only having 2 dates in europe this yr but idk if i can afford paris or london bc they r both crazy expensive cities :( im used to going to concerts on my own too !! like for ooo im going with a friend but usually i just go alone n make friends while queueing lol

yes my bias in ooo is kyubin ! like the second i saw him i was like yep thats him thats my man now im in love with him

n tbh yeah i love lightsticks ! i have cravitys (bought it last yr for kpop lux in madrid but never used it bc it got delivered too late :')) n tbz's (bought it when i was in seoul n it was like ½ the price compared to europe) n i also have the rose's old acrylic lightstick from their 2nd europe tour !! idt i'll buy onlyoneof's tho i'll just bring cravitys since its similar enough n i wont be near the stage anyways lol but i get u bc once u buy one lightstick its a point of no return like now everytime i go to a concert i need something to wave in my hands or i'll go insane 😭😭😭

#🍰 seongminiz !#💻 jo yapping #💭 . 🧁 anon !

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dividethesheepy · 2 years ago

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late night rant. I’m ok I promise lol

I can’t grasp the idea that I’ll be ever good for someone. Its been about a year and some change now and I’m still haunted by this bs. I gave my everything into that relationship and just feel so used up and neglected and cheated out of years of my life. Like even in a pandemic, bits of me were taken away from me mentality and I held it down. But when it was the other way around I was left in the dust, spent a whole year with my Ex and her new partner. The strength it took not to do anything crazy is frightening. I have too much to lose on top of what I’ve already lost. I know its stupid to dwell on the past but its just hard sometimes. Not everyone goes through the same hardships and people take those hardships differently. Were not all built the same way, so this will be effecting me until I decide for myself my worth and get over my fears. I deserve the best but am I owed the best? No, I got to work harder and get back into life and replace the last 4 wasted years. OK no I wont say they were entirely wasted. I did learn some things and became a better adult but to endure the pain and suffering it wasn’t worth it. That person took a lot more away than they think, or choose to think... fact is they were dumb as rocks when it came to common sense. There’s talent there but they don’t see it and they feed off the person willing to provide that to them. Its stupid to think just because your ex did that to you and you were fine with it and actually enjoyed being in that situation doesn’t me I’m going to give the same mutual feeling. I was crushed, defeated, and imprisoned there were multiple times I could’ve fucked you over but decided against it, and you used it against me. You knew I would never do it, you took the genuine person in me and manipulated it and then when it came to you in the same situation you took the first chance you took. That’s fucked up, and I hope more karma comes your way.

Call it what you want, I am disgruntled, I am envious, I am vengeful, I hold grudges, IDC that’s me, that’s who I am. Doesn’t matter how many times you think you did nothing wrong, and choose to believe that you’re some nice person who cares about your friends. You can keep neglecting all I’ve done for you by putting him on a pedestal like he was your savior. Things you wanted and got vs things I wanted and never got. I still have all the letters you gave me and it hurts reading them because they are all lies to me now. How can one put so much heart into it and then poof do more and present more to the new guy than what you’ve done for me. All fake yooo that’s who you really are. You can choose to believe whatever your little mind tells you but in reality you’re a cold hearted bitch.

I’m sorry I got to stop looking a social media, small shit really triggers me and look I wrote a lot just now. Had to just relive some steam. I’m playing two people now when it comes to that person. I’m a friend online but in real life you anything, just somebody I use to know... yeah I know Goyte pun lol.

I miss my cat so much too, she got to keep the cat in the divorce... fucking cunt. It sucked too cuz I think she favored her more than me because she spent the most time with her than me cuz I always worked. I always made time that I could provide but it wasn’t enough, she always wanted to be with her even though she neglected her most of the time lol. Now on twitter I just retweet cat photos or videos cuz thats how much I miss that fucking bitch lol.

I’m really a complexed person I would go to bat for someone or ask if they need something or is something is wrong but could never get the same. And I don’t like to ask for that treatment back, I’m very prideful and stubborn but damn my mental be hurting a lot. Like I've never lived alone in my life but since last year it really does feel like I live alone. I’m never here I’m always working I barely see anyone. The one person I actually called and want to call is gone now so its just empty feelings now. It pains me because I feel like I had all that time to actually be with my mom and didn’t grasp it because I made other obligations to others. Now that its reverse she isn’t available and I’ve wasted all that precious time. Its going to hurt for a long time, Christmas was horrible, New Years was devastating, I called my stepdad on his birthday because my mom would always text me to call him and I didn’t get one this year but I remember it clear as day because she never made me forget it lol.

I miss my mom everyday, and I keep hearing her voice hella randomly and it just hurts that I won’t hear anything else from her. That day was probably the worse day of my life, the pain I endured that day was so heartbreaking. I appreciate everyone I called and comforted me during that dark time. Always take the time to talk to your parents even if you're hella busy you step right the fuck out and you answer that call because you never know if that would be the last time you talk/see them ever again. Cherish every moment because they can just poof.

In the end the only thing I got out of the last 4 years was loss and an estimated 12,000 closet. My dog, My cat, My relationship and my mom all in a year and 55 pairs of shoes because it fills the hole in me from those losses.

Honestly I feel much better just typing this all out. fuck a diary RETURN OF TUMBLR lol.

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hakkais-hoe · 3 years ago

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Love your aggressive s/o x Bonten headcanons lol

If possible can we get a version where they find out the only freaking reason she's so aggressive is because she's literally hungry and sleepy... Like all the time? Like she'd need food in her hand 24/7 and constantly eating something (or napping) in order to not go off on someone for breathing wrong for more than an hour lol (you can ignore this if you'd like idc I just think it's hilarious to see them with what's essentially the equivalent to a pissed and grouchy cat lol)

Bonten x reader with hanger issues n a food complex.

'm glad ya liked em :)

love this idea too

Warnings: swearing, blood, fighting, gun references, drug reference (sanzu ofc).

Bonten: Mikey, Sanzu, Koko, Ran, Rindo, Kaku.

Mikey-

finds you rummaging through your bag after a fight

after you come back with nothing from it and a sour look on your face he cant help but ask

"What's up with you now?"

notices your similar to him after he hasn't had a snack for a while

if you ignore he'll leave you to your little tantrum as usual

after a long bonten meeting you're sat drifting off in your chair when someone bursts through the door

you do one of those freaky slow look ups a glare as cold as ice on your face

"You're really gonna come shouting in here n wake me up you fucker?! I'm fucking tired and hungry af n you have the balls to do this shit. I'm gonna cave ya head in dickhead."

'oh' Mikey knows exactly what the problem is now

he grabs a dorayaki out of his stash n throws it to you

you grumble a bit before going silent and munching on the treat

promptly moving to a couch and taking a nap

from then on Mikey keeps extra snacks for the both of you and you take regular naps in his office, sometimes with him.

your aggressive little attitude seems to get a lot better which keeps the rest of the executives calm.

Sanzu-

tbh i don't think he'll realise, he likes it when you're a bit psycho n that

takes Takeomi or Mochi telling him that you seem calmer when you have snacks for him to realise

straight up asks you

"Soooo you got like a food complex or something babe? Cos I get it I get antsy when I don't have a pill for a while, I can get those food supplement drugs if ya want love."

like boy no who tf wants ur shitty drugs

"I want snacks motherfucker not some boring ass supplements, actual food n several naps a day."

our boy only gets it when you spell it out n will buy you all the snacks n food you want

also keeps a blanket n pillow in his office so you can take a nap with him

watches you sleep like a creep can't lie

whips random snacks out when you get n attitude during meetings

loves it when you have a little anger tantrum cos you wanna nap n lets you drag him down onto the couch to use him as a pillow

probably can't sleep cos of the drugs but good effort

"Think you should take a chill pill on the drugs, love."

"Which one's that is it in my bottle? Is it a downer? They're boring baby."

sir you have a problem >_>

Kakucho-

chances are he already clocked it after the first few times he saw you beat a bitch then walk straight into a shop n buy snacks

wont actually mention it he just makes you take scheduled naps under the pretence that he needs one

will gently massage your kneecaps during meetings when you start to get grumpy

pulls random snacks and drinks out of his pockets

tries to keep you calm all the time

practically throws a blanket at you when you get ratty

will bundle you up even in meetings n make you take a nap on his lap

human burrito

very devoted to looking after you

will let you fight when you're really angry but prefers to keep you as docile as he can

"Love, enough. C'mon come sit down wit me and have a snack leave that piece of shit there."

ur surprisingly obedient when he's waving your favourite snack at you

Kokonoi

honestly he just thinks you're a bit nuts plus you spend too much time with sanzu according to him

most of the time he just lets you do your thing n he doesn't get involved

only realises that there's something odd when the Bonten executives plus the boss go out for a meal after a meeting

you're silent for once n you even seem calm as you practically bounce in your seat with all the food in front of you

once he realises that you're a lot calmer with food he offers you his

will send someone to buy snacks as soon as he sees a hit of aggression coming from you

you fall asleep on his shoulder later in the evening

Koko adjusts you slightly to keep you comfortable

hears your light muttering about nonsense

he ignores the conversation that all the executives are having in favour of listening to you sleep talk

he can make out your quiet words at some points which cause him to chuckle

until you mutter about how much you love him

an unusually soft smile on the both of your faces is there until late into the night

tries to make you take naps often after that just so he can listen to you sleep talk

feeds your grumpy self often he orders some expensive snacks just to see your reaction.

Rindo-

if you think this cocky shit would ever question your angry self you have another thing coming

he enjoys watching you beat the living daylight out of anyone

coincidentally brings you some snacks during a meeting one day

usually you'd be snapping and threatening to fight sanzu by now but you're silent for once

he stops listening to Kaku's report to observe you n notices that you're only silent cos ur stuffing snacks in you mouth

"Uh babe? Did you actually just calm down cos I brought you food? If I'd known it was that easy I woulda brought you a whole ass shop."

"Mhm buy me a whole convenience shop n I'll marry you."

the boy definitely does a Koko n buys you way too much to keep in his office and your apartment

please let him pamper you

he realises that he enjoys your happy food enjoying self more than the little psycho you usually are

comes into every meeting with food

when you sleep on his office couch n wake up even calmer than with food he encourages you to sleep more

buys an expensive ass weighted blanket for his office

bless him he heard that they keep people calm from Ran

sometimes sits at the couch reading paperwork with your head on his lap

strokes your hair to help you sleep better

"Love ya Rin..."

your sleep talk is his favourite thing

Ran-

already knew

this man is very aware of everything you do

he may seem lackadaisical but he knows everything that you like and everything that keeps you calm

he plays it off as a coincidence that he started bringing snacks 3 weeks after you started

when he figures out your favourite he keeps them in his office 24/7

also like Rin he has a giant weighted blanket in a cabinet for you

has it out as soon as you come into his office

leaves it so that you can wrap yourself up in it when you're both going through paperwork

you ofc inevitably fall asleep in it

your boyfriend gets you all comfy and lays down with you for a quick nap

he wakes up wot you gently brushing his now messed up hair away from his face

you seem gentle and calm for once as you smile down at him

"Hi handsome. Did you have a nice nap?"

he's shocked ngl

falls in love with you all over again

"You look like an angel my love."

pampers you and makes you sleep a lot in his office just so you can wake up and be calm with him

he wants all your calm attention

will still cheer you on when you have a "tantrum" as Rin calls them

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yesimwriting · 3 years ago

Note

hi, i love all your work! could i please request headcanons for what it'd be like to go from being enemies to lovers with nikolai lantsov.

thank you:)

A/N maybe i moved this up on my request lists bc i woke up today and went 'nikolai lantsov'

- i'm being a little liberal with cannon bc my mind first went to 'princess! reader who hates nikolai bc they're competitive and then they have to team up together to try to get their parents to break up their arranged marriage but fall in love in the process (this might be a little undetailed but i'm thinking of writing a full fic or mini-series with this plotline so let me know if you'd be interested!! i could see a smutty ending to that fic but idk,, lmk what you thing ig lol)

- Ok so first off enemies to lovers with the loml nikolai lantsov would be SO GOOD bc he's so dramatic and obviously attractive so even though you hate him you know he's hot,, there's never a dramatic realization that he's attractive bc it's just a fact

- butttt you'd rather give up any claim you have to your family's throne than feed his already gigantic ego

- okk but lets get to the beginning of your enemies to lovers relationship

- so basically every summer your parents go and stay with Nikolai's family at this super fancy vacation home bc your parents are both royalty and your kingdoms have a very healthy relationship

- just bc it's the summer season doesn't mean it's summer vacation,, so as children for about a month you two share a tutor,, and when i tell you that created a rivalry so fast i mean it

- you're not the eldest princess and you're always trying to be the best for your parents approval, nikolai just wanted to impress the really smart girl who had a pretty laugh (poor nikolai lol,, he had no way of knowing how important being the best in school no matter what was to your self esteem)

- maybe if you two could communicate you’d like each other a little better at this point but it starts when you’re pretty young and by the time you’re like 13 it’s a solidified dynamic (and 13 year olds are the MEANEST and most insecure people in the world so that’s when your relationship turns to full enemies)

- now that you’re 13 you have more princess-y requirements, especially over the summer. So when you see that Nikolai gets to practice with swords and gets more free time while you have to practice setting tables you hate him more than ever.

- Nikolai senses that you’re extra hostile but he has no idea why,, he tries asking once but he makes a joke about how ‘maybe you’re jealous bc youre no longer the center of my attention’ and even though he’s just trying to ease the tension you feel like he’s making fun of you

- so that’s when things get aggressive, but at that point summer is almost over so it’s whatever

- next summer comes and you’re still SO MAD at him,, so when you get to the estate you’re like ‘i’m not even talking to him idc how quiet these next three months are’

- and you get there all determined to hate him,, but once you get there and see him something in you cracks bc he had the audacity to spend the last year going through puberty AND LIKE HE’S ALWAYS BEEN CUTE BUT THIS IS SOMETHING ELSE

- so youre mentally panicking bc how do you even talk to someone that looks like that now???? but then you remember that you didnt even want to talk him so in a panic youre like ‘maybe i can avoid him and he’ll just assume it’s bc i hate him bc i do,, who cares if he’s unbelievably hot now’

- nikolai doesn’t assume anything, he just gets to the estate and is like ‘why hasn’t she insulted me yet?? is she suddenly too good to give me attention?’ so during the lessons that you still share he gets an idea

- he decides to one-up you in everything bc that’s always gotten a reaction out of you

- it works,, every time he corrects you or steals an answer from you, you’re ready to snap but then you look at him and take in his stupidly perfect face and you just shut up

- nikolai thinks it’s not working so he just tries harder

- by the end of week one you can’t take it anymore so when the tutor leaves at the end of lessons you snap, you tell him off for how often he’d repeat what you said and change a few words and get all the praise from the tutor

- on the inside he’s like ‘took long enough’ but the more you rant he’s like ‘is she okay???’ he’d be more concerned if you weren’t threatening his pride and at this point he’s still annoyed bc if you were that annoyed you should have just talked to him instead of ignoring him for a week

- he’s thinking that just bc you got really pretty over the last year doesn’t make you too good to yell at him on the daily

- the worst thing anyone can do to nikolai is ignore him LMAO (lowkey relatable)

- so he starts arguing with you and you’re so upset that you forget about how aggressively attractive he is

- and you two are alone in this room and the more you argue the closer you two get

- the climax of the argument is when neither of you are yelling, you’re just so mad you’re beyond raising your voice and once you’re both at that point it goes like this:

“Nikolai Lantsov, you are the most insufferable person I’ve ever met”

“Well then, Darling, you should look in a mirror.”

“You are so entitled, so ridiculously self obsessed that it ruins your attractiveness.”

“...” he literally just like blinks twice. “You think I’m attractive?”

“Uh? No--i didn’t say that at all, maybe if you didn’t have the language comprehension of a child you’d understa--” he just reaches forward, grabs the collar of your dress, and kisses you.

- it’s your first kiss so you have no idea what you’re doing and it’s with some one you CANT STAND and you’re so mad bc you had expectations for your first kiss and he’s taken that from you--but the thing is,,

- he’s good at it. Like really good at it. Like so good it makes you curious about what he does the nine months of the year he’s not stuck here with you bc there’s no way he hasn’t had practice.

- but you’re also extremely confused and nervous and aware of how stupid you’re being (and a little hormonal bc being 14 isn’t easy) and then he places his hand on your cheek and that snaps some sense of reality into you bc it’s one thing to enjoy the kiss but another thing entirely to want him to escalate it

- so you place one hand on his chest and push him off of you slightly. He takes the hint, pulls away enough to look at you and then you two just stare at each other

- your hand is still on his chest and you have absolutely no idea what comes next, but you find yourself looking at his lips

- since you haven’t slapped him or pulled away more than a few inches he thinks maybe things are okay so he leans forward slightly and kisses you again.

- you reciprocate a little too fast, the kiss lasts two seconds before thinking about how insane you’re being so you push away entirely.

- He lets you go,, and in the most awkward display ever you’re like ‘uh I need to go,, i can’t be late to ball preparation lessons’ and you leave that room faster than you’ve ever left a room in your entire life.

- the next day you consider pretending to be sick to avoid him but that would only give him more power over the situation so you go,, and he’s just sitting there calmly

- youre on edge the entire day but he never even jokes about it

- a part of you is a tiny bit annoyed bc who kisses you and then pretends it never happened? but overall, you’re relieved

- the days pass and it never comes up but now whenever you two argue you think of how quickly kissing him both shut him up and got rid of your tension

- the summer goes by quickly, your usual dynamic has returned and you wonder if he even remembers kissing you. twice. in a row.

- the next couple of years are normal,, even when you two no longer take lessons together you still dont like him. He’s just so assured and he takes such joy in bothering you.

- and then one summer your parents sit you down and they’re like ‘we need to plan the future alliance of our kingdom’

- you’re a little confused bc you’re rarely allowed to sit in on these things bc you’re a girl and you’re basically meant to just be a royal’s bride--and then you realize why you’re there.

- you start protesting before your father can finish announcing your engagement

- the parents were smart bc they announced it at the end of summer so you two couldn’t drive them crazy or conspire

- the first thing you do when you get back to your castle is write to him for the first time ever

- your letter is basically ‘pls tell me you’re doing something’

- the two of you talk until you come up with the plan to get your parents to break up your engagement

- your parents dont really care about your feelings and they expect the two of you to argue with them,, but they care about the kingdoms

- so you two decide that if you act like youre so in love that you let your duties slip the engagement will end,, especially if you two are in love in a toxic way

- so the next summer you two make sure to flirt and act like youre totally obsessed with each other and skip lessons together and just are constantly together and acting like you’re on a honeymoon

- your parents are like ?? since when

- at one point you flirt with a random guard just so Nikolai can have a ‘jealous outburst’ while your families are strolling through the garden

- ngl jealous nikolai had you ready to RISK IT ALL,, you were ready to drop the plan and marry him on the spot

- he notices bc he notices everything about you and when your family walks away he gives you a quick kiss and youre stunned,, much to his delight

- your desire to break up your engagement takes a slight backseat in your mind bc you decide to set off on a secret goal to make him flustered

- it doesn’t take much, your dresses get a little more risky, your comments get a little more suggestive

- the only problem?? he seems to have his own personal goal and it’s to make you even more flustered than he is

- soon the two of you are lost in layers of pretend and competition

- when your parents are finally thinking about delaying the engagement and keeping you two away from each other until you calm down a little (i feel bad for them,, an entire summer of being surrounded by the ULTIMATE sexual tension)

- you’re sad and you don’t know why bc this is what you wanted, but then Nikolai stands up and says that you two planned for this and he has the letters to prove it (he was ready to drop the receipts LMAO) and youre like ??what are you doing?

- and he says he’d rather marry you then never see you again bc now all he wants is to get know you bc he has no idea how he wasted so much time arguing with you

- and you just meltttt but your in front of your entire family and his as well so you just sit there for a minute and then you tell him you feel the same way

- but the summer’s over

- you kiss him before leaving and he says you’ll have to visit bc he can’t go an entire year without seeing your ‘pretty face’

- you promise to visit him soon

- your at home for exactly a day and a half before getting an invitation to visit him

- you laugh bc the only way that letter could get to you that fast is if he mailed it before you even left

- you say yes obviously,, and spend some time having a really cute fall-dating vibes together until you figure out how you really feel

- and you feel like he makes your heart STOP and that’s why you hated him,, bc you didn’t like being vulnerable

#grisha #grishaverse #grishaverse x reader #shadow and bone #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone imagine #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov x you #nikolai lantsov imagine #fic #headcanon #enemies to lovers

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melloian · 3 years ago

Text

Miraculous Ladybug Reboot Explanation

Alright, so i thought about that a summary or short passage about my Au as whole wasn’t enough explanation. Au introduction page was just little so, i wanted to explain more.

What is Miraculous Ladybug Reboot?

Miraculous ladybug reboot is an Au where its a mixture of the original and the concepts but in my own take/version of it.

Why you made Miraculous Ladybug Reboot?

Am late to the party but, Miraculous Ladybug has been going down hill lately. They continuously ruining characters and milking this series. They think its funny to show Marinette being a creep 24/7. And Adrien clearly have little personality and hardly show him (its really bad now in season 4, though lies show his own screentime.) Worst part, Thomas astruc can’t take criticism and blocks people (am aware some people attacks him for no reason). So i decided to make this that kinda erase the terrible things that happened in Miraculous Ladybug.

About Miraculous Ladybug Reboot

(copied and pasted from Au Introduction page)

14 years old teenage girl name Marinette Dupain-Cheng was once a normal student at Françoise Dupont Highschool. One day, Marionette was helping with parents by cleaning the attic. Marinette found a music box on the floor. She look around, decided to pick it up, and put it in her pocket. Afterwards, she decided to open the box in the her room, finding black earrings inside. She decided to try on the earrings and suddenly a creature came out of the box. The creature introduced themselves as Tikki and explained those earrings. Afterwards, Marinette decided to become a superhero known as Ladybug.

Changes

Both of the main characters getting equal amount of screentime

if the show was really about feminisms, then they show that woman and man equal. Both strong in both ways doesn’t matter. This also includes screentime.

Removing Marinette's creepiness and suffering.

(yes am using this picture, still the worst thing i ever seen in this entire show)

Her being obsessive creepy stalker is obviously not ok and teaches kids to think that doing this is ok. So am just going remove that, and keep the idea that she have a crush on him.

other thing that’s wrong if the fact they just keep making Marinette suffer and have too much stress for a teenager. She does too much work for hero, does bakery, babysits and etc. The worse of all is making her guardian. because of all this, she had to tell Alya her secret for emotional support (or something else). Am removing this because its too much stress for teen and it makes me think she have suicidal thoughts and just keeping a smile on her face around people.

Speaking of Guardian...

Marinette will not be a Guardian

Yea, i see nothing good about her being a guardian. If anything it ruins the outcome of the entire point of love square. Even worst, she’ll just forgot Adrien anyway if she quits being guardian.

Not so much heroes

Having too many heroes takes too much time with just saying. You can’t really develop all those heroes at all. So i have shorten it out to only 5.

Chloe actually having a Development

Look idc if a creator makes a character go through Treason arc. However, the way Chloe arc was written, it definitely wasn’t a Treason arc. If anything it looked like a development but the team acting like she never had one. So am just going to do the bully to antihero to hero arc scenario.

Lila being a part of the main antagonist

So basically i wanted her to be the one who starts a rival but is truly a villain who secretly hiding something from everyone.

People is not going get akumantized repeatedly as different forms instead some one else get akumantized.

I rather for the person to be akumantized either once or twice. Not the 100th time. It makes hawk moth look like a joke. So i will make it where Hawk Moth would give up the person after once or twice and attempts to find some one who can be strong enough to beat Ladybug or chat noir.

When Hawk moth defeated, there be another main villain.

There be 7 main villains in total. All them deals with controlling some one emotion. Expect for the last one, which is like the “final” boss of the series.

Nathalie being anti-villain but still the antagonist

I wanted to see if i can write assistant betraying their boss. At the same time, being evil just for the sake of their boss. Sorry gabenath shippers.

Some adults being smart for once.

Can we just agree that most of the adults in this show shares the same braincell awhile all the teenagers are smart? Idk, they just easily gullible to lila’s lie and expel Marinette without any proof or something to know she did it.

There’s not just controlled villains, there’s villains just being villains.

Not every villain is going akumantized, in fact, there will be villains who just evil on their own. They pretty much attack the city and stuff like akumanzatied villains do. This is so that it will balance out the akumanzations.

The villains usually comes in a certain time. Like day, afternoon, noon, or night.

Specials are apart of the story, the heroes will learn something, and the heroes will later will come back.

If the heroes going go to different cities, i want them to at least learn something from it.

Unifications would not exist for other kwamis, it will only for 2 kwamis only which its definitely not the ladybug or cat miraculous.

Unifications are op not going lie. There’s no weakness between the powers or weaken the other. The weakness it have is making the user go out of control if consume too many kwamis. I might be wrong though.

So i will only use it for 2 kwamis only (which is not going be said for right now).

Alya not being a hardcore Adrien x Marinette shipper

It gets annoying if your bestfriend really wants you and your crush to be together so badly and forces you into uncomfortable spots where your crush is at. Even your friend becomes a hypocrite for a straight minute. I have to erase this so that Alya can be actual friend.

Gay characters that are in relationship actually treated like a relationship instead of a very good best friend thing.

I just want to them actually feel like they in actual relationship.

The guardians mentor their heroes if they have soon experienced enough.

I don’t know, wang fu doesn’t really train anyone or be a good guardian for once. Now he’s gone.

Zoe being an secret agent instead of a hero

Before you call me a zoe hater, i just want to say this. Zoe entire existence doesn’t make sense. She was never mentioned in the show until season 4. Audrey cheating also doesn’t add up either and causes more plot holes. So i made it where zoe is secret agent from new york who was tasked to go France. She lied about being chloe’s half sister (and other things) just so she get near to her mission. Which leads to another villain soon.

Felix not being a cousin nor evil

I don’t like how they made felix evil at all. It just feels like insult for the fans who asked him to be in it in the first place. So i made Felix Adrien's brother whose not evil but just gloomy.

Stormy weather being a separate entity

I think it will be cool to see her as a separate villain instead of akumantized one.

Some characters will be either changed or deleted.

Characters will be changed since it is a reboot thing, however some may be deleted because i either don’t like them, can’t find a way how to write them, or they seem pointless character in general.

Viperion is still exist but in a different way

i think its best not to explain this one until later

Superheroes (not miraculous heroes) were created by a mage.

I think is best to not explain this one either until later

Added things

Species

There’s going be more species instead of Superhumans, Kwamis, and Humans. It so that the universe can be expanded.

Dimensions

(lol portals)

Dimensions existed for bigger plot points in the story. It also another way to expand the universe some how. The only way to enter dimensions is by portals or keys.

Types of kwamis

There will be types of kwamis. Like animal kwami, mythical kwami, dark kwami, hoilday kwami and corrupted kwami.

There will also be guardian for each type.

More types of akumanzation/amokzations

As i said eariler, there be more villains with more controlling type powers.

Daroness

Daroness is faraway villain that is owned by Rodrigue. Hawk moth works there as the chairman, making missions for the villains that works for him. However, he doesn’t akumantize people in this place, he does it in his lair instead. Welp, that’s all for now. Thanks for reading :)

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alpacaparkaseok · 3 years ago

Note

Alright here comes said ask:

I’ve only just read the first cut and I-…I will fight somebody. What is happening, do I even want to keep reading!!??? Was she drugged? A scream??? 😭 it’s too late for this 🤦🏽‍♀️

What do you mean the house reaks of death 😭 (it better be Alexandra’s dead body up in this house or I WILL fight you)

The book from the library??? (Confirmed)

Oh yeah Ortega…the dead body can be his (sorry not sorry Ortega, it just can’t be my boys) too, that’s allowed (by bad Alexandra we don’t even know if you’re guilty and I’m offering you up as a lamb for slaughter). Oh shit…someone snuck in the house to kill him before he could say anything??? Or perhaps just bc said person is a psychopath? (Looking at you Yaddy, and yes that physically hurt me to type out). Oof if it was Yadiel the body is not gonna be pretty…the little lunatic 😒

A TRAITOR???? B WHY !!!??!!! I-

…. 😶…I really don’t even know what to say. I have so much 🕵🏽‍♀️🕵🏽‍♀️🕵🏽‍♀️ to do. I guess it would make sense it wasn’t Yadiel who came to her like a dream??? Bc even in a half asleep state I feel like she would just sense the wrongness you know? Like a visceral response to his presence.

Oh ho ho 🕵🏻 Yoongi is on it for me??? Agreed not Hobi or Namjoon (or so YOU want me to believe right B??? Help you’ve just created a paranoid monster 😂). I hate to say this…and I’ll deny it if anyone asks me about it again (idc if it’s in black and white right here lol) …but Seokjin is off his rocker enough to be suspicious 🥲. My heart tells me never but it says that for all of them 😭

Wow I’m actually really surprised (possibly slightly impressed?) that she didn’t immediately rule out Taehyung and Jungkook too…

Okay but going back to the first scene…a caress along the jaw…a familiar caress along the jaw. Now who has touched her that way before? Taehyung certainly…jungkook too (don’t think I forgot about the whole finding comfort in his arms thing, I’m still 🙃 about that), Jimin? I feel like he might have in the alley or the… I wanna say barn? (It’s been too long since those chapters). Jin??? Seokjin did too I think. Ugh. That could be any of them now that I write it out all 😭. I’m fairly certain against Yoongi and Namjoon…even if that makes me a 🤡 at some point. I just don’t see it (oddly enough I’ve also written those two off from being endgame…coincidence??? I think not. Wait but wouldn’t that also make them perfect candidates for being the mole??? Cause surely reader wouldn’t end up with said mole. Look at the paranoia you’ve created). I also don’t see them being in that sort of position with reader.

Unnatural reason??? 🕵🏽‍♀️ I’m still suspicious about a potential drugging…idk how bc idk how drugging someone would work but surely there’s some kind of gas or something that would make you drowsy without suspicion (oh duh there is, carbon monoxide…tho idk how much would knock you out like that without killing you?)

Oh yes yes, see drugs.

Ugh. Not you making Seokjin even more suspicious, already awake? 🤦🏽‍♀️ Then her falling back into his arms on accident!!?? It’s like you want to hurt me specifically (I’m dramatic I’m sorry).

Okay but for me Yoongi trusting Namjoon with reader says a lot (also does this mean we are finally getting more one on one namjoon moments???)

Okay what’s killing me is why would they not try to hide or disguise that it’s betrayal??? That doesn’t sit right with me. Why would they be so obvious when the clear result is the whole house being on edge and trusting no one? UNLESS, that’s exactly what the person who killed Ortega wants you to think…you know what they say, a house divided. I’ve split decision come to a theory (and by that I mean yes I have a theory that I will be sticking with but no it was not a unanimous decision, even tho the only one deciding on it is me 😂)

Not Jk calling her jagiya 🙃

WAIT why was Yoongi awake so early!!!?? Rookie mistake Mikayla…rookie mistake, he literally told you not to trust him smh (I’ve devolved into speaking in the third person, are you happy???). I don’t want to believe Tae or Jungkook could be it but if something is keeping her from trusting them, some gut instinct, it might be best not to??? Idk, somewhere in the back of her mind she knows who it is…recognized the build and touch, it’s there…

They’re gonna be so hurt when they find out she didn’t trust them tho (when it turns out it was none of them bc I refuse to believe your peanut butter lies).

All I have to say is

1. Yesh, drugs.

2. the process of you wondering who killed Ortega and then realizing that it was one of the boys was hilarious to read sksksk

3. so the 🕵🏽‍♀️🕵🏽‍♀️ begins

4. love how you're like, "yeah, it's not Yoongi obviously" to "WAIT BUT WHAT IF IT IS"

5. WHAAAAT did you just say that Seokjin is suspicious? never thought I'd see the day

6. nope, they aren't really trying to hide the fact that there's a betrayal. thus commences their plan to take the entire clan out from the inside.

7. also love the fact that a part of you is clinging to the idea that it was actually none of them.

#miksancheese #b:asks #htss:asks #ah the theories begin again #so ready for all of it

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batarangsoundsdumb · 3 years ago

Text

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist.

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right??

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless......

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :(((( )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho)

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

#literally if you got through this i just respect you #this is mainly just for the people who sent me an ask in the past few mask #i hope your ask is in here :)#sorry for everybody else #ask #bataranswers #this took me 4 hours to do so i hope youre happy #also sidenote #does anybody know the latin translation for 'to become'#bc i just used future of 'esse' but it could be a different verb #who cares tho latin is a dead language #big congratulations to everyone who translates my sentence #here's a bonus sentence: tuam matrem futueram

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