#it's really fun to give machines a good hard look and try to integrate their parts into a weapon design :]

[kobbers]

Hunter Varl with his gunlance. :]

[vykker]

Here's part 2 of this ask!

So in regards to baby Interns... What's tough is, when I try to guess what they're like, it leads me down rabbit holes speculating on what Intern society must be like in its non-Vykker-labs state & I get lost in the sauce. Also we have NO information to go off of. So this is 100 percent going off guesswork and vibes. I put it all under readmore because it got long sorry!

In one of the Discoddchats, Lorne was talking about Wolvarks [but lumped Interns in with them] and how their societal structure is different from what we've seen so far in Oddworld. He didn't elaborate beyond this. I'm guessing he means societal structures that do not have a queen at the top of the pyramid. So, I'm going to guess that Interns parallel Vykkers and are asexually reproducing hermaphrodites.

Unlike Vykkers though, I don't think Interns are mammals, simply because Vykkers have nipples and Interns don't. Thus, I postulate that Interns lay eggs. HOWEVER... I don't think they have a lot of real estate for eggs, physically speaking. Interns already have bulbous, taunt abdomens, like all of their organs are crammed into a tiny space. We know that some of this is due to their unhealthy lifestyles, but I find it hard to imagine even a 'skinny' intern. I think they're always bulbous like Cheesecake. Anyway, because of this, I think their eggs are very small- like no larger than their eyes. I think they're also soft-shelled like snake eggs and are only produced in very small quantities, maybe even just one at a time.

With this in mind- I headcanon that Interns are SUPER teeny tiny when they hatch and probably really gangly and bug-eyed and freaky. If you've ever seen baby preying mantises, that's what I'm picturing, looks and behavior and all. These are just some random concepts:

I also think they're 100 % self-reliant. Interns do not strike me as being maternal AT ALL. I have a hard time picturing the average Intern being a good parent. In the Art Book they're described as not giving AF about the Mudokon eggs. Just going off vibes here.

I think that in the wild, Interns frisbee their eggs into the woods or something and either they hatch or don't. If they do hatch, they're tiny and scrawny and immediately mobile. Like insects. Their first year of life is spent purely as animalistic predators. They scamper around on the forest floor and catch bugs, lizards, and other small prey, apex predators of a very small patch of forest. They consume massive amounts of protein and grow very quickly. Once they reach about a foot or two in height- no longer in danger of being stepped on- they instinctively seek out the nearest Intern tribe and integrate with them. They mimic the adult's behavior and pick up on their language and stuff from copying them.

From there we could have a lot of fun speculating on what tribe life must be like for them! And what sort of psychological ramifications come with spending your earliest years being feral in the woods.

As for how they end up in Vykker's Labs, I think there are "Intern Farms" which are companies owned by Vykkers Labs which contract out Interns for labs all across Mudos. Eggs are gathered up and kept in Intern Pens where the babies are fed crickets and cigarette butts until they're big enough to climb out. Once they do, they fall in a pit and are taken to a new area where they start Intern School. What goes on there? idk yet I haven't thought that far ahead

I think they get their foot surgery as soon as they start Intern School and probably spend a lot of time strapped into desks being forced to learn stuff like those bomb sniffing bees

As for how the Farms get the eggs, you know that stereotype about broke college kids being donors for $? I think its like that. I'm picturing a vending machine type deal where you put an egg in and $10 moolah falls out. Someone swings by to empty them once a week and they're sold to the farms for pennies. The rest end up in recycling because eggs are not permitted to go anywhere else. The vykkers don't want an unchecked population of them running around. Interns by nature are not sentimental and largely DO NOT care, but I'd imagine maybe a scant few feel kinda bad for perpetuating their species' shitty circumstance for beer money. Maybe they leave theirs in the Poop Chute? Most get squished but maybe a few would make it. I’m picturing a Mudokon tribe with one random intern now

Anyway I will stop! Thanks for the good question!! Kinda went off topic at the end but I love speculating on things like this lol

[skylarmoon71]

Bumblebee (Transformers) Chapter 16

It takes a few days for the hospital to actually release you. Everyday Sam, Bee and Mickeala were there. It feels just like the old days. Your grandmother spent the majority of the time fretting over you. When you’re finally offered a moment to breathe, you’re back at the hangar with the autobots.

There’s relief across the board.

Lennox and Epps greet you at the entrance. Bee looks very surprised to see you there, so does Sam.

Optimus comes from around the corner with Ratchet.

“It’s good to see you well.” Optimus says.

“It’s thanks to you.”

Optimus shakes his head.

“You were the one who was brave enough to face an adversary. All to protect us. “ When he kneels, you’re surprised.

“Thank you (Y/N).”

You can’t find the words to use. Optimus wasn’t the kind of person to bow to anyone, so you’re honored.

“This whole time you were working together huh.” Lennox says with a laugh.

“Definitely a plot twist.” Epps jokes.

Optimus stands.

“I apologize that I could not explain. It was crucial that Laserbeak believed that she was working against us. I could not protect (Y/N) the first time. She did not want to risk anyone else getting hurt. I needed to respect that wish. I owed her that much.”

Bumblebee understands. He knows that when you went missing he didn’t exactly have the best mindset. He was spiraling. Because if he’d been honest from the beginning, he kept telling himself that this would have all been different. Finding out that you risked your life, your safety to protect them even after he lied to you, it just made him love you more.

“I’m really sorry about the way I reacted when I found out.” This apology was long overdue for all of them. As they stand there, autobots and humans alike, you convey your message.

“I was angry and hurt. You aren’t obligated to tell me anything. I can’t imagine what it’s like losing your home and integrating into another. I was selfish. I should have been more understanding about how hard it is to keep a secret like this. I’m sorry about everything.”

You hope they can all see past your moment of weakness. Because you do regret the words you said to Bee and Sam. The way you threatened the autobots.

“We understand as well. Our existence is not easy to swallow. We’re fortunate to have an ally like you.” Optimus words make you unimaginably happy.

“As beautiful as this is, I’m still unclear about the whole allspark thing. Should we be worried?” Epps’s question makes Lennox send a look.

“What man, I ain’t trying to get blasted.” You chuckle.

“You have nothing to worry about. Laserbeak was after his own interests and he didn’t realize he was training me to destroy his machine. He showed me how to use it, how to control it. I’m not going to turn into a nuke or anything. I’m sort of like a battery. I just charge items, not so much blast them."

“Well that’s good to know I guess." You grin.

“Anyway, I’m heading back home before my grandmother has a fit. I biked all the way here. Anyone wanna give me a ride back?”

“I will!”

Bee is eager, and Lennox chuckles. Bee’s engines rev, slightly embarrassed. You tilt your head a bit confused, but you’re still wearing a smile.

Sam pats Bumblebee’s leg.

“I’ll see you both later then. I’ll catch a ride with Optimus.”

“Are you sure?”

He nods.

“Have fun.”

So Bee shifts back into a camaro and you jump inside. As you both drive off, Ratchet shakes his head.

“Young love.” Epps teases.

They all just start laughing. 

[wickedlybadass]

I’m not gonna say that Trump’s victory speech was the worst speech ever but I will say it is nothing compared to Harris’ concession speech at all. In Trump’s speech, all he talked about was his family, Melania’s new book, talking about his parents in law and how they miss them, listed some states he won in, thanked his family, said he was gonna help people heal without going further into it, pointed out Vance and his wife and congratulated him, poked fun at the media like CNN. Allowed Vance to speak for about 30 seconds though Vance did give better words, talking about making the country better (no details on how) before stepping aside for Trump. Vance looked like he had no idea what to say. I have to wonder if Vance ever thought, “what the hell was I thinking getting involved with this guy?” Trump continued with “he (Vance) turned out to be a good choice”. Trying to pick words because he obviously didn’t rehearse this speech like, “we’re gonna make this special, I guess that’s what you call the it, special” (what the hell?). He continues talking like he’s confused saying we’re going put up a border, then let people come in legally but doesn’t elaborate more then suddenly introduces Susie and Chris as if he has ADD. Clearly, he likes to introduce his people even if they have nothing intellectual to say like Chris. Kept talking about how great everyone is, his time with Elon Musk, some spaceship moving around while he was on the phone with someone, starting some crazy talk about the hurricane in NC and starlink or something, asking Elon if Russia, China or the USA can use it. He says we don’t have a lot of geniuses and we have to protect them. Well, I can think of one guy isn’t a genius and I’m talking about him! But protecting him? Well, those idiots from MAGA voted from him so I guess he’ll have to be protected. Started introducing some athlete guys onstage while the audience chanted their names as if they were at a rock concert. Guy shows up arrogant saying this is what happens when the machines does this or that and saying “this is karma.” Trump kept on making it obvious he had no idea what else to say with repeating, “we’re gonna turn it around”, kept saying it’s very special, thanking the American people again. Says RFK Jr is making Americans healthy again but didn’t elaborate. Apparently, he’s just listing people who support him because he has no idea what else to say. Bragged about oil and how nobody have what we have, talking about bringing in taxes but no details on that. Carried on this campaign about how historic it was with a lot of diverse people involved (I’m sure diverse people have helped in other campaigns before, he clearly has nothing smart to say), gonna stop wars but no word on how. Again, he wanted this speech to be long and he was obviously running out of words to say. Mentioned having 900 rallies. Seriously? Then went back to talking about himself talking about the attempted assassinations and how he is still here for a reason. Ok, the very end of the speech wasn’t that horrible. Says he’s gonna make promises and work hard. Yeah, well….

Anyway, his whole speech was all about him, his family and friends and he just likes to tell stories that has nothing to do with serving Americans at all because he thinks it’s time to put on some fun, entertaining show when he’s onstage! Hardly anything about his details for his plans or anything about what America is really about and how he’s going to maintain that. He just went up and just started acting like a fool and looking like a joke and making the victory all about him, his family and his own supporters, not all American people including those who didn’t vote for him!

Kamala Harris should give him a few lessons about humbleness, professionalism, dignity and integrity. During her concession speech, there were a lot of tears in the audience because she lost but Harris stood up there actually acting like a professional and an adult. Trump needs to listen to that speech so he can learn how to give a speech that the American people need to hear. I’m sure Harrsvwas quite emotional and upset when she lost. She went on more than 12 hours without posting on X after she lost. I’m sure she was busy processing everything in private instead of lashing out, unlike Trump did when he lost in 2020. She stayed calmed and went out and gave a very positive, professional and mature speech about loss, working hard, accepting loss and hardship, fighting for your country and never giving up. She didn’t get up there and start giving out personal stories about herself, talk about her family and her own personal success, mention her endorsements or show up unprepared. She took the loss with grace (no matter how unfair it seemed to anyone) and uplifted people and stayed positive and she led the people to the beginning of healing after this loss instead of being bitter and throwing accusations and whining, ‘but I won! Your machines are broken and I’m gonna sue everyone who didn’t vote for me!”

Being president is about leadership and guiding people in the right direction, not being so cynical and whining and threatening when you don’t get what you want. Trump thought what happened in 2020 was unfair so he lashed out. People are furious about this 2024 elections and Harris didn’t follow suit and lash out and make accusations. She didn’t start investigating or make phone calls and make sure the votes were counted correctly. No other losing president has ever done that in the US history!

it’s too bad Harris won’t be president. People can learn so much from her. Instead, MAGA people want to take over, focus on control and incite violence when they don’t get what they want. Being a leader is about being professional and humble, even if you think the results are wrong. It’s not about what’s right and what’s wrong, no matter what you think. It’s about controlling yourself, not other people!

[fluorescentvermin]

Chapter 2

You'll figure it out - Charlie

I was still shaken by what just happened. One day, our relationship is perfect, and the next, it’s broken and “can’t be fixed”. I’m trying to figure out what Ella was referring to when she said she was unhappy. I can’t remember a single time where she could have even alluded to her unhappiness.

Maybe this is all a test, and she doesn’t really want to divorce me. I’m a good husband, I look after her. My only downfall is that I’m unemployed, at least I think so. It’s been difficult. I didn’t realise until after graduating from university that The Neo Journal would be hard to get into.

Maybe this is just a lesson that Ella wants me to learn. A wake-up call so I can get back on my feet and continue providing for her. I am a good husband; I want to continue being a good husband. I’ll figure this out.

But for now, I need a place to sleep.

I walk to the closest hotel from our flat and make my way inside. This hotel isn’t terrible, it can be a bit expensive, but I have the funds for it. The hotel lobby has a minimalistic design with white leather couches, plush carpet, a fun freestanding waterfall feature and marble flooring that continued up the concierge’s desk.

“Hi! Can I get a room for the night?” I ask politely, giving the concierge a smile.

“Just for yourself, sir? Or are you expecting company?” The concierge asks, tapping away at his keyboard.

“Just me. No company” I add.

“A room for one night would be $1,800. Because you’re checking in late, we’ll have to ask you to pay upfront. Is that okay, sir?” The concierge informed.

“Sure. That’s no problem” I smile.

“Perfect. The machine is ready when you are sir” the concierge instructs, holding his hand out to gesture towards the card reader. I thank him and tap my phone against the screen of the card machine.

“Oh, I’m very sorry sir. It says your credit score is in the negatives. I’m afraid I can’t accept your card at this time” the concierge winces.

“What? Why does that matter? I have the money” I furrow my eyebrows in confusion.

“I’m sorry, sir. It’s company policy. We’re a high esteemed establishment and we only accept payment from people with appropriate credit scores” the concierge explains. He has a look on his face that seemed like a mixture of disgust and politeness.

“When was that implemented?” I ask, still confused.

“Since the bill went through government to prevent money laundering and… unsavoury folks from tainting our economy three years ago” the concierge further explains with a look of judgement. I guess I must have missed that article.

“I am not laundering money or an ‘unsavoury’ person, okay?” I defend.

“Sure, sir” the concierge smiles insincerely.

“Fine, I understand” I sigh, taking my cue to leave.

Unbelievable. The audacity. To even assume I’m either of those things is uncalled for. I’m an educated man, I’m just down on my luck is all. Maybe I can do an Infinite search for hotels that don’t care about this ‘credit score’ nonsense.

I search the internet through my phone for a reasonable hotel, deciding to go for a little walk as I do so. It doesn’t take long before I found a hotel online. It says specifically on its webpage that it accepts any credit score, whether good or bad. The only problem is, it’s a lengthy walk. About thirty minutes away. I could call a taxi, but they might deny my card also. Maybe walking could be good for me. I grab the address of the hotel from their website and put it into my Infinite Maps app through my smart glasses. My smart glasses are pretty nifty, they display a user interface onto the glass to integrate helpful information without affecting my vision. The directions are displayed onto my glasses, and I start my journey. A walk would be good, after all, it was a lovely night. The fluorescent lights of advertisements and neon signs lit up the dark sky. The cool air hit my skin as I walked through the city. It seemed quiet tonight, or maybe it was just the street I was on. I double check the map to make sure that I was following the navigation correctly. It was a bit strange that my navigation was sending me down an alleyway. Normally Infinite Maps only directs through main streets. I stopped at the entrance to the alley, it looked dark. There wasn’t much lighting up the path and I couldn’t see what was down there. I was nervous, but I swallowed it down taking a deep breath before continuing down the alley. As I made my way through, the smell of rotting garbage hit my nostrils. I use my free hand to cover my nose, but it didn’t help much. It’s fine, it’s not a lengthy alleyway, I just need to walk faster, and it’ll be over before I know it. I quicken my pace. It wasn’t long before I stepped in a puddle, soaking my socks.

“God damn it!” I curse, inspecting my foot. The water was gross, it left dirt stains on my sock.

“What’s a matter, pretty boy?” A mysterious voice called out from the shadows. My heart dropped.

“W-Who’s there?” I shout out, searching the darkness.

“Just your imagination” another voice escaped from the shadows. Fuck. Fuck this is bad. As much as I tried to find the source of the voices, I couldn’t see them. My heart was drumming in my chest. I had to get out of here. I make a break for it, running down the alleyway. Suddenly, a hand gripped onto my wrist, yanking me against the wall.

“What’s a guy like you doing in a shitty alley like this?” One of the voices showed themselves, leaning in to interrogate me. It was a punk, dressed in a spiky leather jacket and ripped jeans, sporting a neon green haircut. Two others got closer, another punk with a shaved head wearing a baggy shirt with patched up jeans, and a woman with red and white streaked hair wearing a filthy button up shirt and uneven pants. This wasn’t good.

“I-I’m just passing through. I don’t mean any trouble” I sweat. The punks were smiling sinisterly at me.

“Neither do we. If you hand us your phone” The punk with the green hair demanded, putting his hand out expectantly.

“I wonder what’s in that bag of his?” The one with the shaved head chuckled, reaching for the shoulder strap.

“W-What? N-No! It’s mine, you can’t have it!” I defend, looking to the end of the alleyway, hoping I can make a run for it. The punk with the shaved head grabbed my face, forcing me to look at them.

“Give us the phone and the bag” The shaved head punk demands, squeezing my cheeks. I couldn’t tell if they were a man or a woman, but their face was littered with tattoos.

“W-Will you let me go if I do?” I let out, hoping that they will be decent human beings.

“Sure” the green haired punk smiles. I sigh. I have no choice. If I don’t give them my things, I could die. But if I give them my phone and satchel that held my laptop, I’ll be without access to my bank account, my wife, my family. I can’t think about that now. I have to think about my survival. With a heavy heart, I hand them my locked phone and my satchel.

“Can I leave now?” I ask, the punk’s hand still gripping tightly onto my face. The green haired punk takes my phone and shoves it into his pocket, while the red haired punk put my satchel over her shoulder.

“No” the green haired punk smiles from ear to ear, before the one with the shaved head reels back and punches me in the stomach. I try to breathe but the wind was knocked out of me. I gasp, trying to take in air, and slide down the wall. Of course, they’d beat me up, how could I be so stupid? I flap around on the floor, desperately trying to breathe. Then one of the punk’s kicks me in the chest, and my ribs immediately hurt. I’m writhing in pain, when another kick lands against my shins. The pain is unbearable, I’m locked up in the foetal position. Another kick, this time in the head, and with the force of my head slamming against the brick wall behind me, I pass out.

<- Previous Chapter | Next Chapter ->

[13uswntimagines]

Things *Good* Alphas Do (Alpha!Becky x Alpha!Alyssa x Omega!Reader)

Request: Alpha Alyssa and Alpha Becky/ Omega reader where she’s newer to the team and really shy, especially around alphas and Becky and Alyssa come up with elaborate plans to spend time with her (with the teams help) and omega reader slowly falls for them especially when they protect her from a push alpha when they’re out somewhere?

Alyssa watched you from across the bar. Tracking every movement you made as you ordered your drink next to Mal. The other omega was leaning heavily on you, and she made a mental note to give Rose a heads up. 

The team paid little attention to her protective stare, more than used to her and Becky’s possessive (but carefully restrained) behavior around you. They understood the delicateness of your situation. 

You weren’t just shy, that much had been overwhelmingly obvious since you had joined the team about six months ago. When you first arrived, you were skidding beyond belief, flinching every time an alpha so much as looked in your direction. Even around the two women who were destined to be your mates. 

It was a slow process but the omega’s on the team had eventually gained your trust, and in turn began their plan to get you to accept your alphas. 

*****

Attempt 1 - one month in

Christen was the first person you trusted. Her quiet, calm nature resonated with you and you found that her alpha, Tobin’s, chill vibes didn’t set off warning bells in your brain. 

You loved hanging out with her (the team joked that you followed her around like a puppy for those first weeks), and morning Yoga together had quickly become an integral part of your routine. You didn’t like it when people messed with your routines. 

“I didn’t know you two did yoga,” You mumbled, raising your eyebrows at the two alphas shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. 

“We wanted to try something new if that’s ok with you?” Becky asked hesitantly, reaching out to carefully run a hand down your arm. 

“We thought it would be a good way to enjoy the view,” Alyssa shrugged, the only indication she was nervous of your answer was her worrying her lip between her teeth. 

You glanced worriedly at Christen. You had come to look forward to yoga. It helped you to relax and center yourself before having to deal with the craziness of the team. 

She nodded encouragingly at you, a small smile playing on her lips as she released a bit of her soothing scent (your alphas did too, but at a much lower rate- afraid that overwhelming you with pheromones wouldn’t work well in their favor). 

“I’m sure they’ll be fine, our routine isn’t too complicated,” 

“And they’re going to be over here by me,” Tobin added, gesturing towards two yoga mats a little ways away from the ones you and Christen were going to use. 

You were pretty ok around Becky and Alyssa (your inner omega definitely recognized them as her mates), but no one wanted to push you too fast too soon. You eyed the spot Tobin had pointed to and your alphas respectively. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust them, it was just that the previous alphas in your life hadn’t made you feel confident that they would treat you as an equal. That they wouldn’t push you to accept them before you were ready too. 

“We respect your boundaries y/n,” Becky said softly, her finger still rubbing your arm, her soothing scent getting just a little bit stronger. The lines for what you and your inner omega were comfortable with were set, and neither alpha was going to overstep it. 

“We just wanna be close to you,�� Alyssa added, equally as soft. 

You paused, looking for any hint of dishonesty (unaware of the apprehensiveness leaking through your fledgling bond to your alphas). 

You nodded when you didn’t find any. “You can do yoga with us,” you smirked, feeding off of the excitement they were sending your bond“if you can keep up that is,”

Tobin cackled at your sudden surge of confidence and the wide eyes of your mates. They hadn’t gotten the chance to see your sassy side yet, and she knew that they were going to have their hands full. 

“Let’s get started then,” Christen laughed. This was going to be a fun morning. (And if Tobin got to watch your alphas fall all over themselves to get you to feel comfortable around them, then this was going to be a fun courtship to watch). 

*****

Attempt 2- 3 months in

“I wasn’t built for this,” Alyssa huffed as her head popped back above the water, whipping the hair from her face and clinging onto her surfboard for dear life. 

“And you think I was?” Becky grumbled, paddling over to her alpha mate, while still trying to keep an eye on their omega who was heading out past the breakers with Kelley in hopes of catching another massive wave. 

You had taken a long time to warm up to the feisty omega (you were still incredibly hesitant around her rambunctious blond alpha). They were happy that the omega’s on the team were starting to really crack your shell. It helped that most of them were into the same crazy activities you were. 

The team was trying to take advantage of your love of surfing as a way to help your alphas bond with you, but it wasn’t exactly going to plan. No one had accounted for the fact that neither of your alphas was particularly good on a surfboard, or in the water for that matter. So they had spent the majority of the day watching as you, Kelley, Tobin, and Alex had basically swum circles around them. 

“Looks like you two got yourselves a daredevil for a mate,” Emily snorted, coming up beside them. Her watchful eye never left where her mate was moving next to you. 

The two of you had a knack for finding trouble, but she hoped that didn’t extend to the waves. 

“I don’t know how you all do this,” Alyssa huffed, finally pulling herself up on her board. 

Emily shrugged with a giggle. It was hilarious the lengths your alphas went to spend time with you. “Lots of practice my friend. At least you have more patience than the rest of us,” 

Becky and Alyssa shared a look as you paddled after a giant wave. It seemed that you were definitely going to give them a run for their money. When you were more comfortable and you had finally accepted them as your mates, they were going to have to set some boundaries for sure. 

“I didn’t know she had it in her,” Ashlyn cackled, joining the group watching the two omega’s shred that monster wave. 

Your alphas jaws dropped in awe, excitement and pride surged both ways through your (slightly stronger) fledgling bond. 

“We might wanna duck dive,” Emily mumbled just before she disappeared into the water. 

“What?” Becky asked, glancing at Ashlyn who also dove under. She turned back towards Alyssa, her eyes widening when she saw the giant wave coming right for them. 

Alyssa’s gaze followed hers, 

“fuck” she hissed, just as the force of the wave took them, tossing them around like socks in a washing machine. Their boards flew out from under them in the watery barrage but surprisingly didn’t become untethered from their ankles. 

Both alphas made it back to the surface with minimal sputtering, dragging themselves the rest of the way inland. They were very much done for the day, but it appeared you weren’t. 

Your head popped up above the water with a huge grin on your face. Kelley’s wasn’t too far behind you. The two of you shared several words before hopping on your boards and heading back out through the surf to do it all again. 

The alphas shook their heads. 

“We need to convince her that cuddles and movies are just as good,” Becky grumbled, and Alyssa nodded in return. The yoga was hard, but at least it hadn’t almost killed them. Hopefully, whatever plan the team came up with next didn’t involve more extreme sports. 

*****

Attempt 3- 6 months in 

You stood there with your arms crossed, glaring daggers at the two alphas in front of you. You were sure they could feel the frustrated pheromones rolling off you, and your agitation leaking through your evergrowing bond. 

You were fairly comfortable with the women who you knew were your mates, but you weren’t quite ready to take the leap and admit your feelings. You also weren’t really fond of this little surprise they had sprung on you for your team-bonding night seating arrangements. 

Every seat in the hotel room was taken except for the one in between your mates on one of the queen size beds. 

“Are we going to pretend that you two didn’t plan this?” You growled at the alphas, who were shrinking back into the bed. 

“We didn’t!” They exclaimed, Becky, holding her hands up in surrender while Alyssa seemed to tuck into herself (which was completely hilarious because of how big she was). They both released a little bit of their scents (along with several members of the team), hoping to appease your very unamused inner omega. 

“Well, it’s one hell of a coinkydink that the only open seat is between you,” You huffed, not buying the innocent act they were playing up. 

Your alphas sent a pleading look towards the ringleader of this particular attempt, “They had nothing to do with this short stack. It was all Sammy’s idea,” Kelley shrugged. 

“Hey!” Sam exclaimed at the same time Mal giggled out a “Right under the bus,” 

You glared at the omega’s who had become your friends over the past several camps. “You all need to stop meddling,” 

Kelley rolled her eyes. You were utterly adorable when you were trying to be grumpy (Kelley was sure your alphas would agree- if the looks they were giving you were anything to go by). “Yeah, yeah. Just sit down already,” she said, kicking your butt from her place cuddling into Emily on the other bed. 

You tipped forward, landing in Becky’s lap with a huff. She steadied your shoulders as you scrambled from her lap (ignoring the way your inner omega preened at the attention). 

“You alright darling?” Alyssa asked, watching carefully as you wiggled in between them into a more comfortable position. 

“Mm fine,” You mumbled, sighing when you finally found a comfortable position (completely ignoring the fact that it had you pressing into Alyssa’s taller frame). She smiled indulgently at you, slowly working her arm behind both you and Becky to make herself a more comfortable pillow for you. 

Becky’s hand came up to rub soothing circles on your arm, working her way very slowly up your shoulder and towards your neck. You hummed lightly, sinking further into Alyssa. 

You couldn’t help how relaxed you were around the women. How absolutely safe you felt. Your eyes slowly dropped shut. You guessed the warmth of your mates (the soothing pheromones they were releasing) was causing your exhaustion to finally catch up with you. But you still didn’t want to fall asleep. It would make you a perfect target for a joke from the other youngins. 

“Just relax, we’ll take care of you,” Alyssa whispered into your hair, placing a very sweet kiss on your temple. 

“Promise?” You asked, quaking an eyebrow. They had gained your trust over the last six months, but you still needed to make sure before you let go completely. 

“Always,” Becky nodded. You hummed in agreement, finally giving in to the pull of sleep, confident that your alphas would ward off any unwanted pranks. 

*****

You were having the best time ever. You were never really a fan of bars or dancing, but here with the rest of your team, you were having a blast. 

Mal leaned heavily into your side “How do you do it?” She asked, her words still clear despite how many margaritas she’d had. 

“Do what?” Your eyebrows furrowing. You had no idea where this conversation was going, but if the shift in pheromones was anything, it wasn’t going to be a place you wanted to actually talk about. 

“Resist the urge to mate for so long,” Mal snorted, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

You felt heat flood your cheeks, traveling all the way up to your neck towards your ears. You didn’t have a lot of good experiences with alphas, and in the beginning, the quiet stillness of your mates had unnerved you. You wondered when they would drop the calm and patient act and try to take what they believed was theirs. 

Over time, you learned that they never would. They would never cross a boundary you weren’t comfortable conceding. You learned how to trust them, how to finally let yourself begin to lean into the feelings your inner omega so strongly believed in. You were getting closer and closer to finally being ready for them, it had just taken you longer than most (something your alphas assured you they were fine with). 

“I-... I don’t,” You stuttered, but it seemed like Mal didn’t even realize your internal spiraling. 

“I was barely able to hold out for a week with Rosie. We met and it was like bang- insta-heat,” she rambled on leaning in very close to your ear, her head lolling to the side on your shoulder. “they love you, you love them, so what’s the holdup?” 

You sighed. You did love them, and your inner omega yearned to finally take them as your mates, but it was just so overwhelming. You didn’t want your relationship to be dictated by instincts, but you wouldn’t deny that you were slowly falling for the women who had worked their way into your heart. 

“I’m trying to get-...” You started, only to get interrupted by a new presence right over your shoulder. 

“Hey ladies, what are two little omegas doing here by their little lonesome,” He said, flashing you what you assumed was his most charming smile as he pumped out his cloying scent. 

Your nose wrinkled involuntarily- his calling pheromones were absolutely disgusting to the earthy sweetness your mates sometimes used to help you calm yourself down. 

“We’re not alone. Thanks,” You mumbled, pulling Mal tighter to you. She may act like your protector for the most part, but that didn’t mean that you wouldn’t step up.

The alpha chuckled, stepping closer to you and placing an unwanted hand on your arm. “Oh contrare. You can’t fool me with that omega on omega shit,”

More of his disgusting scent pressed over you, calling for your submission. You steeled yourself, fighting against the urge. You had raced worse on the soccer pitch from opponents far more dominant than this duchbag. He didn’t deserve the honor of your submission. 

“Don’t touch me,” You growled, staring him defiantly in the eyes and shrugging his grip off your arm. 

His lips twitched as though he was amused by your defiance. “Come on baby, quit playing so hard to get,” he said, his hand returning just a little bit higher on your arm. You winced at the tight hold, opening your mouth to respond, only to be cut off from a low and dangerous growl from behind the man. “I believe she said to let go,” Alyssa said.

“Now!” Becky added, and it felt like something in your chest loosened. Their pheromones drowned out his scent, wrapping around you like the world’s softest blanket. Like everything would be alright now that they were here. 

The alpha smirked and shot a low growl back at the two enraged alphas. “Whoa, calm down. She’s just playing a little hard to get. Now get lost, I was here first,” 

Becky stepped forward, gripping the alpha’s forearm so tightly you were sure his bones were straining under the stress. “You will take your hand off our mate before we remove it for you,” She rumbled, the sound resonating in her chest, as Alyssa stepped in between you and the alpha, acting as a shield. 

“Fuck you guys,” The alpha hissed, finally letting go of you and storming off to go harass some other omega’s. 

That when you noticed everything was shaking, or maybe it was you that was shaking? At some point during the exchange, Rose had come to retrieve Mal, dragging her away from the cloud of angry and dominant pheromones. 

Alyssa turned and pulled you inter her arms, and you buried your face in her chest. Becky hugged you from behind, encapsulating you in their warmth and protection. 

“You alright, babydoll?” Becky asked as Alyssa started to purr to soothe you. 

“Hmm, just hold me,” You hummed, your omega finally calming down. The arms of your alphas tightened around you. You were safe with them, and they would always be there for you. You knew that. 

“Always darling,”

[fawad-khan]

Me! With Peter hehe🙈

Ahh I knew you'd be the first one to request hehe love you sisso 😘

Me!

Pairing- Peter Parker x stark!reader (coz it's just better that way amirite?)

Warning- none, some swearing, shouting, enemies to lovers?

Word count- 1.3k whoops

Masterlist ☆ Blurbs

"Peter why do you have to bring up such atrocious ideas? Why can't we just go about it in a simpler way?"

"Because, I'm not your fucking puppy alright? For once let us just do this my way!"

No matter what the situation was, Peter and you always ended up having a first class row with five to ten minutes of being together in a single room. Be it missions, be it a movie to watch, be it suit improvements, he always managed to counter your opinion in some way or the other, and you hated him with your guts, your rage would rise and you'd end up shouting at each other till one of the avengers ripped you apart. He always had to find something to point at and criticized every single thing in your life, just to annoy the hell out of you.

Now, you maintained your composure when it came to school, as you did not want to get into trouble in school, and so did Peter. But this time, he had crossed the line.

You both had unfortunately been partnered up for your chemistry finals project. Normally, you wouldn't worry about passing it as chemistry was one of your strong subjects. However, the teacher just had to pair the two of you together, and none of you were eased about it.

You always liked to be as creative as possible and loved to integrate some art and splash of colour to intrigue your audience and to add creativity to your projects. Which is why you had come with a simple, yet effective plan to do a project on chocolate analysis, something that would catch everyone's attention, and at the same time with the fusion of chemistry be a very interesting experiment indeed.

Peter would rather die than admit that he actually thought this idea was pure genius. He had never really thought about something like this which was actually not very hard to do. But his arrogance got the better of him. He kept on giving stupid excuses on how this and that could go wrong, and how they could instead do something machine related. Of course, doing that wasn't easy as you required various complex tools to make a project related to machines and wiring which weren't easy to procure and neither your dad nor Bruce would give them, they themselves getting blasts of messing around with them.

"Peter this is not the time, okay? I've never once just brushed your idea by the side and went ahead with my thing without your consent. I came up with this idea for the both of us and I thought you'd be more interested in this, but clearly you have to go against every single idea I have." Your voice was now very loud and practically the whole tower could hear you..

"can you just shut up? Just calm down for fuck's sake."

"No no I am calm, alright? Here I am, trying to plan out a project with a guy who always disagrees with me, will find fucking faults in every little thing I do when I'm trying to score a grade for the both of us, yeah sure I am CALM!" You shouted the last word and picked up your stuff and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind you.

He let out a frustrated groan, and held his head in despair. Tony saw you storming out yet again, and decided to take matters in his own hands. He entered your room, where Peter was still there.

"Another fight, huh kid? What is it this time?"

"it's nothing, Mr Stark. Just between (y/n) and me."

"Kid I've seen enough of you both bickering and almost at war at each other to say that it's nothing. It is something, isn't it? What's the matter?" He asked calmly, taking a seat beside him.

"I don't know, I just, every time she suggests something, and they're good too, I don't know, I just find myself counteracting towards them, you know? Like my brain somehow decides to just disagree and shout at her for everything. And it hurts me when I realise that I hurt her each time, you know? I really don't know what to do about it." Peter took a deep breath followed by this rambling, his face holding an upset expression.

Tony knew his protege very well and could sense that he did not want to go on like this. There was a high chance of why he always behaved like this.

"Kid, there is a possibility as to why you're behaving like this." He said, patting his back.

"Really? What is it?" He asked, perplexed.

"Normally when a guy and a girl argue a lot everytime they see each other, it usually means that they like each other. But sometimes they don't want to express it and so it comes out as rage and end up fighting."

"What? I- uhh" Peter had no words. He was thinking of how your cheeks always were flushed red and your hair wild and toussled whenever you two fought. The way your lips pursed together, made you look like a tornado and even then, he never failed to notice your beauty. Oh god Tony was right, he liked you!

Judging by his expression, Tony realised that what he said was true. Without uttering a word, he pointed his head towards the door, silently urging Peter to go to you.

He got on his feet and rushed out of the room, searching for you. He climbed downstairs to the kitchen and walked towards the storage cupboard where all snacks were kept, as this is where you usually came to eat from your secret snack stash whenever you were upset or angry.

He knocked on the shut door and waited. He could hear some shuffling inside, indicating that you were going to open the door. You opened the door, revealing your tear stained face, sniffles escaping your mouth. He had made you cry. He was now internally kicking himself for upsetting you. Yet how did you manage to look beautiful even when you cried?

"What happened, Parker? Come to tell at me more? Because I can't take this anymore." You said in a quivering voice, looking down at your feet.

"I -uh, don't know where exactly to begin, but uh I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier. I just shouldn't have. You know better, and I uh- how do I say this?" He let out a breath and continued, "your idea wasn't that bad, y'know? I think I kinda liked it." He shrugged.

"Uh that's actually different than what I expected. Anything else?" You asked curtly.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I hurt you. I don't have any right to treat you how I treated you, and now that I look back, I was such a dick, it's a wonder you didn't run for the hills." He laughed at this.

"Oh, Peter uh, that's, uh really sweet of you." You paused, thinking of what to say next. "Actually, I uh am sorry too. I shouldn't have shouted at you like that today or all the past times I've shouted at you. It was just wrong, and I should've been more calm, I guess."

"Yeah, but also you look pretty cute when you're all flared up like that you know?"he said in a cute shy voice.

"Wait what? You really think that?" You asked, playing with a loose hair strand coming out of your ponytail.

"Yeah" he said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Well what would you say if I said that I think you're kinda handsome too?"

"Really? Are you serious?"

"No I'm (y/n)" you giggled.

"Shut up." He laughed.

"Well I'm the only one of me, and that's the fun of me."

"Well you're right about that. Maybe wanna go on a date sometime?" He shrugged.

"I'd love that Peter."

Spotify Wrapped Blurbs Event

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[pochiperpe90]

Points of view – The Interview: Luca Marinelli

How do you approach your characters. 

Sometimes I also wonder how I get to the character. For “Non essere cattivo”, I had a very detailed script and a fascinating director at my disposal, so I didn't struggle to relate. It was a very brave script for the way it dealt with reality. At first my auditions went in the direction of Vittorio's character but also knowing the figure of Cesare, more than once I thought I would like to play him. I saw the auditions of others and I stopped to think how I could have done Cesare. Then at a certain point I remember that Claudio looked at Valerio and told him that it would be better to reverse the roles, to let me try Cesare, and so it went. When I read the script of “Lo chiamavano Jeeg Robot”, the first thing that struck me, besides the courageous imagination, was to understand how a film of this kind could be made. 

In the first part of your career, you brought an image of introverted and staid youth to the screen. Was this a choice. 

Absolutely not. Or rather yes, it was the choice of those who met me first. Perhaps a part of my personality has been seen that could best marry the characters in question. It happened both in “La solitudine dei numeri primi” by Saverio Costanzo and later with Virzì in "Tutti i santi giorni", then it can be said that with Casare of “Non essere cattivo” and the Zingaro of “Lo chiamavano Jeeg Robot” I was allowed to turn things around slightly, to play a character who had a disposition and behavior that was completely the opposite of what I had faced previously. 

What do you remember about your debut with Saverio Costanzo. 

He was my initiation into cinema, I came from the Academy and I had no idea what it was like to work on a set. The best memory, in addition to the experience of the film with him and Alba, is the first meeting, the first audition, where I really understood that I strongly wanted to work with him and that if this had happened I would have ended up in the hands of a great author. 

With that film you found yourself in the main competition of the Venice Film Festival. What memories do you have of that first time at the lido. 

Of a huge confusion and a big headache. We were tossed around from one interview to another and not only that, because the worst thing was always answering the same questions, and I was terribly worried not to make the situation even more boring for the machine operator, who never changed, and I don't think could take it longer to hear the same phrases over and over. Fortunately, Alba was there as well and saved me in more than one interview. The experience helped me because the following times I knew slightly more what I was going through and how to manage situations and keep stress at bay. Or maybe not yet, it's a long way. 

I noticed that when you talk about your job you do it using the verb “to play” (giocare). Is it a coincidence or the choice has a precise meaning. 

Perhaps it’s not a coincidence that in English the term recite is said precisely in this way because in my opinion to play, or the French jouez, represents the feeling of freedom and fun that is inherent in the job I do, better. As far as I'm concerned, the moment of the take is when the actor has to stop thinking, abandon worries, to be able to bring out the energy of his character. He has to play with the same seriousness and commitment with which a child does. I remember a piece of advice from Carlo Cecchi on the fact that in acting counts listening and the here and now. Being actively present to oneself and to others at that exact moment.

You have a method for achieving this condition. 

If someone asked me something about technique, I wouldn't know what to answer, apart from listening. On the set of Andrea Molaioli's film in which I am the father of the young protagonist, the actor who plays him, Ludovico, who is really good, full of talent and very smart, once asked me what was the technique to make the best of the character, and the only thing I felt able to advise him was to try to be present in that moment and then to let go, listen and not think about the rest. 

But I imagine that there are also practical aspects in the preparation that precedes the start of filming. 

As for me, I try to prepare as much as I can before arriving on set because at the start of the shoot it would be good to be ready. But not everything happens automatically, in the sense that you can’t always find the character immediately. However, I have always been lucky enough to have more or less long periods of rehearsal before starting a film. I remember this moment with Saverio and Alba, where we spent weeks among us and also with the kids who would have played us as children, to try the various scenes and to create a union and harmony between the characters. The same happened with Paolo Virzì, Thony and I, more than once we gather, facing the script, to clarify all the passages and moments of the scenes. 

And how did things go with Claudio Caligari. 

The same thing also happened with Claudio even though the illness made everything more complicated for him. He asked us to change our bodies, to participate in the auditions of the other actors. This allowed all of us, the cast, to integrate and develop a unity of purpose and a truly rare familiarity. So in front of the camera it seemed to me that the gang, to which Cesare and Vittorio belonged, was really part of my life, that it wasn’t hard to pass from Luca to Cesare, because I had found him. And always to identify with the environment of the story, I preferred a house in Ostia, and Alessandro often came to me from Rome to spend time between the two of us. Claudio, in addition to having reading meetings together, also showed us films that were a source of inspiration for him for this film, such as “Accattone” by Pier Paolo Pasolini, “Rocco e i suoi fratelli” by Luchino Visconti and “Mean Sreet” by Martin Scorsese.

Instead, I wanted to ask you what happens between takes, for example when you come home after a day of work. You stay inside the character as it happens to Daniel Day Lewis, or you put it aside and think of something else like Marcello Mastroianni did. 

I try to disconnect from the set. I try. I go home and try to do something else, but the last thought before falling asleep always goes to the next day's work plan and I leave myself a few minutes for the memory and concentration useful for tomorrow and then I close my eyes.  

We asked Roberta Mattei and we ask you too. During the processing you were aware of the exceptional nature of what you were doing. 

Yes. Let me explain: I saw with my own eyes that what was happening was exceptional, a man who was dying wanted to give his latest work to the public, to his audience, to his people, to people. This has no equal for me. Don't think about yourself in such a situation but about others.

Then it was the turn of Lo chiamavano Jeeg Robot. 

I shot Jeeg Robot in March 2014, and therefore before “Non essere cattivo”. The fact that Mainetti's film is only coming out now is due to the long post-production period necessary to assemble the shot with the special effects present in the film. 

Here as well it was an interpretation and a character who completely overturns the transparent and pristine image of the first part of your career. 

To make Jeeg Robot we had to convince each other, Gabriele Mainetti and I, about my success in the character. I pushed him towards a theatricality and Gabriele towards a real madness, a pure pain. In the end, I think we have found the right amount. 

The construction of the Zingaro was already very clear in the writing and it was up to us, however, to find its true aspect. 

Guiding him is this crazy and boundless ego, and the obsession with having to leave a mark. The Zingaro's eccentricity is partly reflected in his look, halfway between a rock star and a suburban bully. For the costumes and make-up we were inspired by the great rock icons. We dared in some choices, such as the black coat with pink leopard lining that characterize the wardrobe. For the aspects related to the way of performing, his model was Anna Oxa and in particular the video of her at Sanremo, when she sings “Un’emozione da poco”. 

In part you have already answered, but I wanted to know how you choose to accept the proposals that are made to you and if you have any foreclosures towards television, or more generally towards commercial cinema. 

I choose the proposals on the basis of love at first sight that must happen with the film, with its screenplay. Then figure out who will be leading the film, meet the director. I don't have any kind of foreclosure, let's say that if I don't like something I don't do it and if I like it I do. And it doesn't matter if it's cinema or television. 

As a spectator what is the cinema you love. 

I like films that have something to say and that I also choose based on who directed and starred in it. Usually when they ask me to name some titles I have a void. Think that the same thing happened to me also during the audition to enter the experimental center, when Lina Wertmuller asked me the title of a film I had seen recently. I was struck by a cosmic void and instead of naming her an authoritative and important film I left her stunned by citing Batman, I think Nolan's first, still a good film, but I still had Wertmuller in front of me... But to go back to what you asked me, I tell you that in general I always like to watch films that come from Sundance, of which I remember, for example “Like Crazy”, which I found disarmingly beautiful, the films of P.T. Anderson, Wes Anderson, the Cohen, there are many, and among the Italians those played by Alba Rohrwacher, Valerio Mastandrea, Elio Germano, Kim Rossi Stuart and directed by Alice Rohrwacher, Costanzo, Virzì, Sorrentino, Garrone, Salvatores. Without forgetting those of the great Joaquin Phoenix. But in reality I look at everything, let's say that I try not to lose anything of these. 

Despite the certificates of esteem you have received for your performances, the impression is that of an understatement that almost seems not to be aware of what you have achieved so far as an actor. 

Whenever I see a film of mine I always think there is something I could have done better. But basically I'm happy with what I've done so far. Having said that, I think that the films alone should be enough to explain everything and that the interviews don’t add anything new to what there was to say before making them. But when I am in the dance, when I need to promote, I am committed to doing it in the best possible way. I strongly think that in life and at work it’s important to demonstrate that you know how to do and not to show at all costs that you do.

DREAMINGCINEMA

Just wanted to translate this old interview for the non-italian’s fans ^^ (sorry for my English)

[lovecolibri]

funnily enough all this centering of m’ria turns her into a bigger plot device than she was in s2, but if the writers stepped back for one sec they would see that if jones used mimi to get the memory, that would give m’ria some emotional arch - trying to save her mother, putting her mothers wellbeing above pod squads/herself, there are plenty possibilities (i know lack of mimi can be simply due to actor unavailability but its quite clear that if the actress playing mimi was fully on board they would still push her aside for the sake of the m'ria is the greatest gift from god-fest) but because shes the center of universe who is perfect she has no actual storyline or character development. shes still as much of a cardboard cutout as she was back in s1 and frankly h’athers acting is not helping in this regard. all this depth and being complicated that her stans love to gush about is just not there. shes perfect, thats all there is.

Uuuuuummmmm, this idea is so good?! Like, they could have opened season 3 by addressing the m*luca issue when everyone else was getting called out about taking personal responsibility for their actions, (which would allow Malex to have already started to address the hurts between them) and then centered her story around her mom which would then tie into everything when Jones went after Mimi. And you're right, it could have been an actor-availability issue especially with the delayed filming schedule, but this is an alien show! They could have made it something like, Rosa's powers that she got from the pod allowed her to absorb some alien information or something and whatever Jones is looking for is in her head so he locks Rosa in her head. Because Rosa? Rosa is a resilient bitch. Then we could have had m*ria teaming up with Liz and Isobel to go into Rosa's mind, OR since Isobel got the memories and stuff from that man on the reservation, Jones could have trapped her in her mind and it would have been Liz, m*ria, and Rosa teaming up to work on things from the outside while we all get to watch the Isobel/Jones showdown we deserve, both of which would allow m*ria to be more integrated into the core group without taking over as the center of attention, even if Mimi wasn't available for filming.

I'm just so tired of watching all the other characters having to worship at the m*ria alter to the detriment of an otherwise really fun and overall interesting season with cool plotlines and lots of alien stuff. I think 98% of my issues with the season could be solved by putting less focus on m*ria because by extension that would allow more screen time for the things we're missing out on, so it's a kill-two-birds-with-one-stone kinda thing. But the flip side of that being the case is that by them setting up the season this way, it is absolutely unavoidable to watch any of the good, fun, cool stuff going on without having to hear someone talking about m*ria or her being in the middle of it, so by extension, putting her on this pedestal of not doing any wrong, it's messing with ALL of the plotlines (even the Lockhart Machine is being tied back to her now 🙄🙄🙄) and affecting All the characters by having them so wrapped up in her that they forget important things like, oh IDK, Kyle being missing. It's so frustrating because otherwise I'm really interested in the Jones and Deep Sky plots this season but it's hard to want to re-watch them when m*ria is unavoidable and seeping her way into everything,.

[brawltogethernow]

So on the whole, how useful would you say Death Note is for teaching someone how to write a convoluted plot between enemy chessmasters that's at least... 50% watertight?

General disclaimer that I haven’t touched the source material directly in many years, and all my dn posts are me feeling my feelings. But yeah, I can shake my 8-ball about this.

There are two components to dn’s approach to “a convoluted plot between enemy chessmasters”, and they’re only roughly stapled together. There’s the rivalry/characterization part, which is both compelling and silly, and is mostly about aesthetic. That never really concludes in a satisfying way. It’s not TRYING to, because the characters are pretty much there to hold up the thought experiment premise, which demands a lot of grit and unpoetic death and not solid foundations of character/relationship work. Like there’s stuff there but you’re really deep-mining for it and doing a lot of the work yourself, and that’s by design. All of the character arcs, which are pretty thin on the ground, trend in a negative/dismantling direction (because it’s a tragedy), and few of the relationships play out all the potential they have (because it’s not a tragedy about relationships).

The character aspect of the chessmaster stuff is heavily reliant on the conceit that once people are smart enough they will start reaching the same conclusions in the same way. Like there’s a single most ideal train of thought for every situation that even people who should have very different thought processes will reach with the assistance of enough little gray cells. This isn’t uncommon in smartboi stories, but dn went absolutely ham on it, if you want to make a study of that trope.

The biggest takeaway there is probably noting how the creative team seems to have been unaware that a lot of their audience was actually buying into that between the lead and their rival as a “meant to be enemies” kind of thing and didn’t realize that faction would be less interested once it became obvious that no, all geniuses in this world are taking turns using one brain. I’ll freely admit I deliberately misread this element to maximize my own investment.

Then there are the tricks and puzzles. The odd logical hole is inevitable, but overall they’re solid. They’re also just procedural plots delivered in a less formulaic story than that usually makes one think of. There’s nothing distinguishing them from the weekly puzzle of a House episode or a Detective Conan arc except for raw creativity and panache. There is rarely any characterization going on whatsoever. The twists require players, but you never get the sense that only whoever is being pulled to act could fill their part. They’re always stand-ins for perfectly generic individuals, putting their distinctive quirks and intense personal philosophies aside. This is that idea that there’s one way of thinking that everyone is accessing at staggered intelligence levels in play again. People are simplified until they can be pieces in contraptions no more complex than Light’s exploding desk drawer trap.

This is why the trick plots of dn don’t get pored over a lot by fans. They’re looped too loosely to the rest of the story to have an emotional impact that will make them memorable long-term. They’re deceptively simple, too. Kind of the opposite of a story twist that makes you rethink everything that came before it in a new light. You can’t dismantle dn and reassemble it like pentominoes very easily. A lot of it is grand set pieces, and if you tease out any of the puzzle plots they sort of lose structural integrity and flake away. This is why most canon divergence fic for dn is “diverging” by asking the question “what if Light were less of a shit”.

Ultimately, Death Note only gives the impression of being a complex engine made of moving parts. Its strong suit is its showmanship. It’s very good at carrying you along from twist to twist in a state of mild beffudlement that doesn’t quite escalate to belligerent and securing that “Oh wow! That was clever!” reaction. The mastermind-offs of are deceptively static, pretty much coming down to one party either failing or succeeding to thwart a plot laid out by another in advance without a lot of combating each others’ machinations in real time. Once resolved, twists vanish from the consciousness like disappearing gold. There’s no fiber to them, just flash.

This isn’t critique! Most elements of this story do what they’re deployed to do. (If the tricks needed workshopping, people would analyze them more, ironically.)

I’m myself shit at (de)constructing brain tingler twists and can’t really identify if dn’s are useful for instruction purposes. Not for people who don’t already have a natural talent for them, I guess! It might be interesting to identify why they’re not immediately identifiable as bloodless trick plots, except I suspect it might just be that the rest of dn is so insane and dissimilar from stories that usually contain those? Like I already compared it to two Holmes descendants, and it definitely has BBC Sherlock “let the asshole speak, genii are a protected species” vibes, and the criminal protagonist facing off with a detective premise is Arsene Lupin-y, yet I still feel weird identifying Death Note itself as in this broader genre because *gestures to all of it*.

It’s the least formula-reliant example of the breed I can think of right now, which is neat. (Annnnd also definitely feeds in to people being dissatisfied with it because they miscalled what it was trying to be. Dn is just generally pretty unique, and I imagine the team was making up a lot of its playbook from scratch as it went along, which leaves the audience in kind making up the experience of consuming it.)

All of the above is incidentally why dn is infamous for being very compelling in the moment but then having people revisit thinking about it and decide the he-knows-that-I-know-that-he-knows conceit is actually ridiculous and needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

So uh. This all SOUNDS like bad form, but that’s arguably me being a basic bitch who “likes when plot and character and aesthetic inform each other”, and that’s just fundamentally not what Death Note is. Also it’s kind of a lofty starting goal and writing is hard. Like! This approach worked! We are discussing a very successful property with many fans. (And a weirdly finite cultural impact for its popularity but this isn’t necessarily why.) I guess this is an acceptable playbook, and the takeaway is that you CAN successfully Frankenstein together different unconnected storytelling methods, and it will look dazzling and impressive and barely leave any of your readership feeling confused and hollow inside and likely to return and make fun of themselves for accidentally liking your work wrong.

Oh, also, dn as do’s and don’t’s of building a mastermind character. Do give headlining characters eye-catching, memetic traits. Don’t fail to trace those traits down so they actually represent something at your character’s core because you crossed over the line from “spinning characters out as foils and parallels who compare and contrast to each other in interesting ways” into “all of your smart characters are basically the same challenge-seeking misanthrope stamped with different surface features” -- except WHO ELSE IS GOING TO HAVE THAT PROBLEM? THAT’S NOT NORMAL.

So yeah you COULD study Death Note, or you could binge some crime dramas and then some X-Men issues that have battles in the center of the mind over the same weekend and get basically the same net effect.

[radramblog]

Album Discussion- Shinjuku Mad

Usually on a Tuesday I like to take my time with a blog post. Listen to a full album, do a little research, put some real effort into it.

Unfortunately, time is not my ally today. So I kinda have to do one that’s a bit easier- in this case, I think I’d rather go after one of the ones that’s already on my phone, in case I have to do this on the bus or something.

(wait, I drove in today…)

Today we’re going to go into a self-titled album that is somehow not the artist’s debut. Rather, Shinjuku Mad is the second of two albums released under the name- the reason I specify as such is that one of the two (and later, the vocalist would help out again) members would go on to relative fame under a different name- Vaportrap pioneer Blank Banshee.

Peering into this album is like looking at a beta version of what was to come. It’s very much a different genre, an IDM album that completely predates Vaporwave’s explosion of popularity and Blank Banshee’s seminal album, Blank Banshee 0. It’s a solid enough album in addition to this, but it’s kind of hard to talk about seeing as there’s basically nobody who knows about Shinjuku Mad that didn’t learn about it through Blank Banshee. As such, expect a lot of BB coming up in this post.

Also a block of words, because no music videos exist for this at all. It’s one of those obscure albums.

This album opens on Cure for Fear. It’s one of those introductory tracks you often get in albums, at about a minute and a half long, with very reverb-y percussion and vocals and an almost ethereal haze of noise. It’s got these chimes that occasionally come up, reminiscent of some of the tracks from the AKIRA soundtrack, but beyond that there’s not a huge amount going on here. It does introduce a problem, however, one which we’ll get to later. It’ll be pretty evident if you’re listening along, though.

Track 2: Kowloon. I really did forget how short a lot of these songs were, with this being 2:13- the whole 10-track album clocks in at under half an hour. There’s a mix of drum machine and hollow wood percussion on this track that gives it a really interesting sort of feel, and some of the effects on the vocals feel extremely vaporwave- it’s no surprise that the dude behind this went on into that genre. Here’s where I can’t help but hammer on that issue I mentioned earlier, though.

The vocals on this album are quite weak. I know they’re very much trying to be ethereal, the reverb and falsetto make that much clear, and that style very much suits the instrumentation. But it just doesn’t sound great. It kinda comes and goes, but by and large I’d label them as subpar. I don’t really think it’s the fault of the performance either, it’s not like the bloke is missing his lines or mumbling more than is necessary for the album’s aesthetic, but there’s just something about them. They might be too loud in the mix for this kind of genre? I’m not 100% sure.

Resistor, the third track, is the best known song from this album by an order of magnitude. I mean that quite literally, as the track as over 540,000 monthly listens on Spotify as compared to Kowloon’s 32000. It’s kind of shocking, I mean for such an obscure album with zero singles, why is this of all tracks the one people suddenly latched onto?

As it turns out, it’s because again of the artist’s future work as Blank Banshee. Resistor would be reworked into one of the more popular tracks from BB0, Dreamcast, and it would appear that people got curious as to what the source was.

The thing is, aside from sharing a vocal performance, the tracks are very different. As it is, Resistor is a much faster track than the previous, driven by this fast percussion and bassline, making for a genuinely solid exercise track of all things (I say from experience). It’s got a fun little synth solo in the middle, the vocals are pretty solid (aside from like right at the end of the last chorus, holy shit), and the song’s coda and outro are a fun little bit of controlled chaos. I’d put Resistor as one of the better tracks on the album, is what I’m saying.

I’m going to do something I haven’t done in a while when discussing music on this blog- I’m going to jump through a few things. As much as I like this album, the songs aren’t nearly interesting enough to justify a song-by-song breakdown. I think if you listen to Resistor and like it, it’s probably worth chucking on the rest of the album- it is, again, less than half an hour long. But its an album where it’s more valuable on a meta level than it is sonically.

Shinjuku Mad as an album feels a lot like a hybrid between older IDM trends and the synth/vaporwave elements that would become popularised in the 2010s. There’s also tracks like Inductor, which border on rock songs with the power behind that bassline and percussion- in general much of the instrumentation is cleaner than you’d expect from an artist like this, especially considering how muddied much of the vocals get. There is a real focus on the vocals, which as I’ve discussed is a weakness of the album, but I do think it’s possible to look past that issue. There’s some really fun synth lines, some excellent percussion, and real aesthetic. Songs like Human Wave Attack feel stark and lonely, notes echoing into the void, which ironically is not at all like Track 4, Void- with synths and vocals disguising a guitar and drum line that feels extremely garage band. As in, the concept, not the program. Singularity is a song that feels again predictive of Blank Banshee’s future work, a low, slow synth track reminiscent of BB songs like Hyper Object or Metamaterial.

There are some genuine gems on here in addition to Resistor, though. City of No Tomorrow, the eighth song, has got to be one of my favourites- somehow, despite featuring none of the instrumentation typical of the genre, it’s extremely cyberpunk, a sense of struggle and futility resonant through the track. It’s the one song on the album I listen to regularly, getting myself lost in the groove of the bass and tapping my foot along to the percussion. It’s just really good, man.

If this isn’t your first time encountering Shinjuku Mad, reading this might cause you to go back and have another listen, upon which you may notice a few somethings missing. I don’t expect that to be the case for literally anyone reading this…but I needed a segue. This is because, upon the reintegration of Shinjuku Mad and its predecessor Organic Thoughts from the Synthetic Mind into Hologram Bay’s catalogue for the 2019 reissue, two songs were cut, likely for fears of legal issues regarding sampling. The version of this album that I remember has those tracks!

Those songs are Negatives (formerly track 6) and Neon Exodus (formerly track 12). Negatives is another one that’d show up as a Blank Banshee track (in this case, Gunshots), and is actually really solid? Like it integrates a raid siren into the instrumentation without having it sound weird, out of place, or, well, alarming. Neon Exodus is…wow I just don’t know this track at all. It’s fuckin aesthetic though. Welcome to this spontaneous live-reaction, I guess. I recognize the sample this is built around (and thereby why it isn’t on the album anymore) but I cannot name it for the life of me. It’s, uh, interesting. I dunno, 6.5/10?

Anyway, part of the reason I bring this up is that before I want to close this out I have some complaining to do. Said 2019 reissue was something I tracked at the time, and noticed both SM albums were releasing on Vinyl, Cassette (because, you know, nerds), and digitally. But not CD. I threw an email at the website about it, and they did eventually respond (it genuinely took like two months though), but not in the positive. The reissue had no plans to include a CD, unlike all three previous Blank Banshee albums.

But the original 2010 version of the album, along with a few slight differences in songs and in album order, does have a CD release, albeit an extremely limited one, according to Discogs. These CDs have to exist, they’re now listed on the new Shinjuku Mad website. Apparently one sold 6 months ago through Discogs. I need to find a copy, though considering on that site 7 people list it as owned and 72 (including myself) list it as wanted, it’s probably not going to happen.

And that, ultimately, is Shinjuku Mad. It’s a very odd piece of history as far as vaporwave goes, considering it’s both a prototype and also something completely, utterly different. The album is pretty decent on its own, but not mindblowing, and something you could probably live without. There are like two tracks (three if you include Negatives) that are 100% worth it, but the rest are skippable. Which is a shame, but mediocre music has to exist somewhere, right?

That I apparently haven’t discussed Blank Banshee on this blog before (aside from when I was talking about Vaperror) is actually kind of shocking. I suppose, then, that there might be some lacking context. I probably will have to do that at some point, though I probably won’t do BB0 because I like picking the hipster options- so either BB1 or MEGA. Metamorphosis didn’t really pique my interest, and I somehow missed GAIA existing in the first place and still haven’t listened to it. So if you’re interested in seeing me ramble over some of that, I’ll see you then. I mean, it’ll still happen if you aren’t interested, but nobody’s going to make you read it.

Or am I…?

[army-of-mai-lovers]

Why Amon Should Have Been An Android

(spoilers for LoK and Young Justice season 1) 

If you followed my LoK liveblog at all you may have noticed that I theorized at one point or another that all four major villains of LoK (Amon, Unalaq, Zaheer, and Kuvira) were secretly robots/androids (the term I used was robot, but the more accurate term would have been android.) Now, with Unalaq it was definitely just because I found him boring, with Zaheer it was to make fun of the fact that he was an Airbending prodigy with zero training, and with Kuvira it was because it was a thing at that point for me to predict that an LoK villain was a robot (and I was kind of right that time!!) 

But with Amon? I was completely serious. We never see his face, his cause is stupid (and the perfect way for his programmers to start some trouble in Republic City), and he was able to resist bloodbending, which, if you’ll recall, requires that the victim have blood for it to work. You know who doesn’t have blood? That’s right, androids/robots. 

But there’s another reason that I sincerely thought Amon was going to be a robot (android), and it’s the reason I’m writing this. There was something naggingly familiar about LoK to me, and no, it wasn’t that it was a sequel series to ATLA. To me, LoK doesn’t really feel a lot like ATLA (barring, of course, the very poorly shoehorned in fanservice cameos of Iroh, three times, like he’s a recurring character or something.) I struggled to pinpoint exactly what it was, but in my own observations and the observations of other people that I was talking to while liveblogging, a couple key differences became clear: 

[ID: an image of Korra from the back looking out towards Republic City, which is shown to have large white skyscrapers, a bay, and numerous smaller buildings. Much of it is obscured by fog and clouds. The city is built in the middle of a sprawling bay. /End ID]

1. the setting of LoK is incredibly Americanized and Eurocentric. While ATLA displays a lot of cultural insensitivity towards the cultures it borrows from in choosing how to depict them, LoK...doesn’t really depict other cultures. Republic City to me felt very similar to how 1920s New York is typically depicted in media, and no setting in the Earth Kingdom or Water Tribe was explored enough to really explore the unique cultures of those settings. While you can tell in ATLA that bryke was somewhat interested in (a vague, exoticized, unrealistic vision of) East Asian culture, LoK is very clearly inspired by America and Europe, with very little else influencing how the setting was depicted. 

2. there are no “unimportant” people in LoK. Everybody is related to somebody we know from ATLA (or somebody from ATLA), a powerful business mogul, military, somebody high up in the government, a celebrity, and/or the Avatar. The only character I can really think of that’s an exception to this is Kai, who really does not have much of a role. (I guess you could argue that Mako is an exception but y’know...he was a famous pro-bender for a while there) You don’t just get to meet a regular person living in a village anymore. Every character in LoK has political, social, or cultural power. 

These points, put together with the technological prowess of the world of LoK (which is different season to season and sometimes even episode to episode depending on how the writers are feeling that day), made the show feel very distant from ATLA, but very, very close to another show that I have watched and loved. And that show is Young Justice. 

[ID: an image, from left to right, of Batgirl, Blue Beetle, Bumblebee, Beast Boy, Miss Martian, Nightwing, Superboy, Wondergirl, Robin, and Red Arrow in the foreground, posing together. Above them and in the background are the adult heroes, obscured in shadow. From left to right, Red Tornado, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Batman, Superman, the Flash, Green Arrow, and Wonder Woman. They are all against a gradient blue background. /End ID]

For those not in the know, Young Justice is a DC animated cartoon focusing on the teen sidekicks, proteges, and relatives of superheroes like Batman, Superman the Flash, Green Arrow, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, and others banding together to form their own superhero team. YJ is set in America, vaguely, with characters residing in cities with names like Gotham City, Star City, and Central City (a naming convention that Republic City fits right into). And as is apparent from the premise, most of the characters you’ll meet in YJ are superheroes, related to superheroes, or otherwise important business moguls, celebrities, or political figures. And while the world of YJ is of course significantly more technologically advanced than that of LoK, there’s more overlap than you’d think. Besides spaceships, teleportation, smartphones, and genetic engineering, there’s really not a lot of tech that YJ seasons 1 and 2 have that LoK doesn’t. 

So you may be thinking, “ok Arthur, we get it, you’re a fucking nerd, what does this have to do with robots?” I’m glad you asked! One of the storylines of YJ focuses on the war between rival tech moguls Tio Morro and Professor Ivo, in which they build increasingly sophisticated androids. Ivo’s are pretty much just designed to kill supers, but Morro’s are expressly designed to mirror the human psyche, and desire to be a part of human society. Amon very clearly also desires a community, and does much of what he does to integrate himself into a community of nonbenders where he really doesn’t belong. Further, Morro’s androids are immune to threats that humans are not immune to because they are not made up of organic matter. For example, in season 1, episode 3, Miss Martian attempts to read Red Tornado’s mind, to no avail, because she can only read the minds of organic beings. In a similar vein, Amon was able to resist bloodbending, and while unfortunately that was not because he was an android, it would have made sense given the conventions of the cartoon android genre. I didn’t realize it at the time, but my previous YJ knowledge very much influenced the way I read that scene. The way Amon’s body was animated very much mirrored the animation of Morro’s androids trying to resist their evil creator’s programming. 

So, I’ve taken you through the what, the how, but I promised that I’d say why Amon being an android would have been better, and I plan to deliver. First, it needs be remarked that while Amon being an android wouldn’t have made much sense, it would have only made slightly less sense than the canon explanation of Amon being Tarrlok’s secret brother. In fact, I’d argue that, if handled correctly, Amon being an android could make more sense and be more impactful. Here’s how I envision it: android! Amon would be pretty similar to Red Tornado, in that he would know that he was an android and be programmed to help people. He was of course, built by Hiroshi Sato (that man designed and likely built all the Equalists’ weapons he has the range), who sees himself as a sort of father to Amon. Hiroshi tells Amon about the systemic disenfranchisement of nonbenders and how a Firebender killed his wife, and Amon, being programmed to want to help people and to desire participation in human society, decides he wants to lead a revolution against benders. However, an android can’t very well openly lead a revolution (you could add a bit in the backstory episodes about how humans don’t trust androids or something), so Hiroshi and Amon come up with the story that Firebenders burned his face and hands, which is what prompted him to lead the revolution. Thus, his whole body, including his face, is covered, and his followers assume that it’s because the burns are so bad, and they follow him. In the latter half of the season, the krew would uncover Hiroshi’s involvement with the Equalists, but Asami would be the one to realize that Amon is an android that Hiroshi built. Amon being Hiroshi’s “son” of sorts would be another element of Asami coming to terms with the evils of her family, as Amon in this case would be a machine programmed to be easily manipulated to follow Hiroshi’s cause and would consider himself her brother, and she would have to reckon what to do with both of them. The nonbenders’ cause would still be legitimate after Amon was exposed as an android (unlike it is when the literal figurehead of their movement is also antithetical to their movement) and the heroes would have to reckon with the realities of bender supremacy and the hurt it caused. Amon could even get a redemption arc and work with world leaders to make a better society for nonbenders and androids like himself (I’m sure there’s some parallel you can draw between nonbender oppression and android oppression, though I can’t think of one atm) As an added bonus, Amon wouldn’t be able to bend, so he couldn’t bloodbend Korra, which would be one less time that an LoK villain took away Korra’s bodily autonomy. Amon could even be a recurring character in the later books, because really, wouldn’t LoK have been more fun with a newly-redeemed android sidekick still learning about what the world is outside of his creator’s narrow worldview? Plus, that would give Asami more to do in books 2 and 3 than meet Varrick and participate in love triangle drama (Amon is of course replacing Varrick’s presence on the show), and getting to know and bond with Amon could be the catalyst for her visiting her father in prison in book 4. 

Remember, I didn’t claim that this would be good, I claimed that it would be better, and since the bar was on the ground with that secret brothers twist that wasn’t too hard to accomplish. tl;dr bryke are cowards, take the plunge and make him an android. 

[autolenaphilia]

Exit Sherlock Holmes by Robert Lee Hall

This book, first published in 1977, is one of the weirder Sherlock Holmes pastisches. This book is almost entirely impossible to discuss without spoiling the ending, so I will put the spoilers underneath a cut.

This story begins in October 1903,with Holmes telling Watson that Professor Moriarty had also survived the Reichenbach falls. The villain has now re-emerged, and to fight him, Holmes has to go into hiding without Watson, his retirement to Sussex being a cover story for this.

Not long afterwards, Watson has a strange, brief confrontation with Moriarty, and decides to find Holmes himself. But he discovers that Holmes has not only obscured his present whereabouts from his friend, but also his origins, which are shrouded in mystery.

The book then centers on Watson trying to uncover not only trying to find where Holmes now is, but also who Holmes and Moriarty actually are. He teams up with a now adult Wiggins to do so.

The central Holmes-Moriarty mystery grows ever more bizarre. Why did Holmes have a hidden laboratory with a strange metal cage in the basement of 221B? Why does Moriarty look so similar to Holmes, yet denies being his brother? Is Mycroft Holmes actually Sherlock’s brother? And this is only some of the more obvious questions in this story.

This part of the book is actually quite well-told. Watson’s narrative voice feels credible, including the depictions of various canonical side-characters, and the build-up of suspense and mystery is well-done.

Then we get to the reveal, and in order to avoid spoilers, I’m going to place the rest of this under a cut. (although this book is like 40 years out of print, and not sure I can recommend it either, despite it being weird and sort of interesting because of it).

It turns out there is no mundane explanation, but a fantastical one. How this reveal is sprung on the reader is what makes this story so weird. Because while there are certainly hints of it, the science fictional angle isn’t explicit until the final part of the story and isn’t advertised at all on the cover of my edition. I knew of it going in, but that is because I was spoiled by reading about this book in an essay about Holmes pastiches. I can’t imagine how out of the left field it must be for the ordinary readers of this book.

The substance of the reveal is that both Holmes and Moriarty are time travellers, from about three-hundred years into the future from 1903. Their era is highly advanced, with space travel and cloning. Holmes and Moriarty are identical clones, test-tube babies, genetically modified and trained to be brilliant actors and performers. There is a dystopian, Brave New World angle to this, as other clones are made to be obedient.

While Holmes came out of this process as a good person and a great actor, Moriarty while brilliant, became evil and greedy for power and attention. He decided to time travel back to the Victorian era in order to use his superior knowledge to conquer the world, and forced Holmes with him because he wanted Holmes to challenge him. Reaching England in 1878, they assumed the identities of Holmes and Moriarty. Holmes then fought Moriarty and the evil organization the professor created, as in the canon. The cage is Holmes’s attempt to reconstruct the time machine, and Mycroft is an actor Sherlock hired to give himself the appearance of a past in this time period.

Stories in which the great detective is confronted with supernatural or science fictional phenomena are common, but this one is extremely weird. The supernatural elements in these Holmes pastisches are often up-front, with titles like “Holmes vs. Dracula” or “Holmes vs. Cthulhu”, whereas “Exit Sherlock Holmes” doesn’t advertise itself as a science fiction story at all. And while he is usually just a brilliant representative for ordinary humanity in those stories, this one posits a fantastic origin for Holmes himself.

It is a twist entirely out of the left field. The only context I can really think of is the great success of the book “The Seven-Per-cent-Solution”, which had a revisionist take on the Holmes mythos, with Holmes going insane from cocaine and imagining his old mathematics tutor Moriarty being a criminal mastermind. Publishers have tried to replicate the sales success of that book practically ever since. This is the reason why (plus Holmes starting to fall into the public domain 1980) so many Holmes pastiche books have been published in the past 46 years or so .

And particularly in the immediate wake of “Seven-per-cent-Solution” in the 70s, the influence of that novel led to several revisionist takes on Holmes being published, which tried to up the ante in that direction. It led to a particularly infamous novel where the twist was that Holmes was Jack The Ripper, and apparently this book, where Holmes and Moriarty are time travellers.

And I’m not sure how it works. Certainly, the build up of suspense and mystery to the reveal is well-done. The world Holmes comes from is pretty much a standard high-tech science fiction future, but the details Holmes reveals are interesting.

But I don’t know if Holmes needs this sort of explanation. This reveal is fun, but it ultimately feels random. Certainly, Holmes seems ahead of the detective methods of his time, but he always felt like a pioneer rather than a time traveller. I don’t see his abilities as so superhuman they need a fantastical origin. In fact, his deductions are often based on his detailed knowledge about the environment and time he lives in, which the time-traveller idea doesn’t go easy with.

The climax also hinges on a plot point that doesn’t entirely make sense. Holmes is convinced that the only way he should defeat Moriarty is by forcing him to travel back into the future with Holmes. Yet he is sad to leave the world of 1903 and Watson. But it is never clear why time travelling back is the only way to defeat Moriarty. It mostly comes across as an irrational obsession of Holmes. Why can’t Holmes just kill Moriarty and then stay in the time period he prefers? Neither man is invincible, Moriarty himself tries to kill Holmes in the climax with a simple revolver bullet to the brain.

The ending of Holmes using the time travel device to literally exit the story seems only to exist to make it absolutely clear that time travel is indeed real in the world of the novel. It isn’t well-justified by the plot leading up to it.

Exit Sherlock Holmes is ultimately a very weird book that is hard to rate. It is a mostly well-written book, the build-up to the reveal is well done. It also displays a clear knowledge and love of the canon. The final reveal is certainly imaginative, if nothing else. But that imaginative reveal isn’t entirely satisfactory. The reveal is well-integrated into the canon, but it doesn’t feel justified by it in my opinion and mostly comes across as random. It is a fun enough read, but really not sure  if I can really recommend tracking it down on the used book-market.

[localtopegg]

1-30 for the video game ask. you know i had to do it to ya

I literally had to make a google doc for this, there was so many questions, cause formatting machine broke here:

Do you try to stay away from walkthroughs? 🥚 Aggressively. Walkthroughs, guides and videos are a last resort.

Company you're always loyal to? 🥚 I mean Nintendo's pretty high up there but I'm gaining a LOT of respect for Double Fine lately as well!

Best game you've ever played? 🥚 Super. Paper. Mario.

Worst game you've ever played? 🥚 Ninjabread Man... Yes. Ye's I've played that shovelware nightmare.

A popular series/game you just can't get into no matter how much you try? 🥚 I've never been able to get into most fighting games of any kind. Street fighter, tekken, smash brothers- Though I'm trying my hardest with smash, since my little brother is heavily attached to it and I'm heavily attached to him.

A game that's changed you the most? 🥚 There's a few games actually! Paper Mario 64, Pokemon Ultra Moon and Hollow Knight! - Paper Mario because it was my first introduction to dark themes hidden under a bright color of paint! Taught me that you don't necessarily need the world ending to have something scary! - Pokemon cause it's kinda been my first bold step out against my religious household's views. It was a good dose on independence! - Hollow Knight is smaller, admittedly... It introduced me to metroidvanias and speedrunning in a way that I can actually have fun! Cheating but not also is kinda fun, haha!

A game you'll never forget? 🥚 Club Penguin! Yes, I'm counting that here! That was my childhood and would probably have done what Paper Mario did if it had come first in my life!

Best soundtrack? 🥚 For those who don't know, I'm a HUGE music fan, so choosing one OST is kinda hard for me! That being said, I have a soft spot for both Mario Galaxy OSTs, A Hat in Time, Psychonauts and recently Paper Mario: The Oragami King.

A game you turn your volume off every time you play it? 🥚 The World Ends With You, after some of my father's comments on the OST, sadly...

A game you've completely given up on? 🥚 Granny Simulator. I don't have anyone to play it with.

Hardest game you've played? 🥚 Hollow Knight by far. You try to 112% Steel Soul that shit and get back to me.

Shortest time you've beaten a game in? 🥚 Maybe an hour? I beat Tattletail in about that time.

A game you were the most excited for when it wasn't released yet? 🥚 PSYCHONAUTS 2 PSYCHONAUTS 2 P S Y C H O N A U G H T S 2

A game you think would be cool if it had voice acting? 🥚 The Paper Mario Franchise as a whole honestly

Which two games do you think would make an awesome crossover? 🥚 Hmm, Genshin Impact and Xenoblade Chronicles! I think they'd mesh nicely!

Character you've hated most? From what game? 🥚 Gosh, genuinely hate? I've never hated any character... Okay maybe that's a lie. I don't hate him anymore but as a kid I HATED Huff'n'Puff from Paper Mario 64. Specifically his fight. He healed himself all the time and the amount of support puffs he could have. As a kid I could NEVER beat him and still have yet to go back to the fight. I know what to do nowadays, but the problem is getting the game.

What game do you never tell people you play? 🥚 ... Cookie Run? Maybe Fruit Ninja?

A game you wish your friends knew about? 🥚 SUPER! PAPER! MARIO!!! And Bugsnax!

Which game do you think deserves a revival? 🥚 Xenoblade Chronicles and Style Savvy!

What was the first video game you ever played? 🥚 Super Mario World for the SNES!

How old were you when you first played a video game? 🥚 Maaaaybe 5? 7?? I was very young, but my brother was younger!

If you could immerse yourself in any game for one day, which game would it be? What would you do? 🥚 Pokémon! I would love to try my hand at a league or even just having an in-person companion in my life.

Biggest disappointment you've had in gaming? 🥚 The Meat Circus

Casual, Hardcore, or in the middle? 🥚 It entirely depends on the game, honestly.

Be honest; have you ever used cheats (like ActionReplay or Gameshark)? 🥚 I never have, to my knowledge. That was more my brother's thing. I have only ever used "cheat codes" that were in a game before, and even then it was just to less around and not actually beat the game.

Handheld or console? 🥚 Computer, actually. I find myself on here more than I do my DS or Switch, mainly cause of my brother and father. I'm always anxious they'll come down here and be upset that I'm on the switch so I just. Don't touch it ever anymore. And my DS is currently Pokemon Nuzlocke Only, so I can hide the game in it.

Has there ever been a moment that has made you cry? 🥚 Mother. Fucking. Huff'n'Puff Fight!!!! Story wise, recently Genshin Impact's been tugging at my heartstrings some.

Which character's clothes do you wish you owned the most? 🥚 I never actually thought about this. Mainly cause I'm not exactly most character's sizes... Some of the NPC outfits in Genshin Impact look really comfy though!

Which is more important, gameplay or story? 🥚 Both are integral to a game! Without a good story, it doesn't matter how good the gameplay is, your players won't have motivation to keep playing. Without good gameplay, a good story will feel more drawn out and disjointed. It's incredibly vital to have both!

A game that hasn't been localized in your country that you think should be localized? 🥚 MOTHER 3! GIVE US AN OFFICIAL RELEASE NONTENDO!!!

[snowdice]

Finding the Time to Study Fic 2 [Day 8]

Here is my starting post for today’s study break stories session. See this post for more details and feel free to send me asks to keep me going! It’s been a lot of fun so far! I will reblog this post with the story as I write them today. I’ll be constantly looking for ideas of times and places for Janus to have missions, so feel free to send in any you can think of at any point!

If you are a new follower or just don’t want all of these posts clogging your dash, please feel free to block the tag “study break stories” as all posts and voting about it will go there. You can still see the finished product of the story even if you are blocking that tag as I will not tag the edited chapters with “study break stories” but with the tag “folds in paper.” See edited chapters below. Chapters 2, 3, and what I have of Chapter 4 are under the cut.

My Masterpost Part 1

I also have a playlist on youtube (because Spotify didn’t have one of the songs I wanted). It’s short, and not really for serious listening, but I had fun with it.

My stomach decided to be mean to me for no reason, but I still want to try to get some stuff done. Might get suddenly distracted though so fair warning if I randomly stop posting/answering asks.

Chapter 2

The morning was just as torturous as Janus had expected it would be. He chewed through another pop-tart, this time bothering to actually check and see that it was a cinnamon-sugar one and drank three cups of caffeinated orange juice. Then, he waved his hand through the air and selected the 1st saved location on his device. He popped up directly behind his desk where he’d been standing the night morning before.

Someone, probably Remus, had shut his integrator down. He swiped a finger across the power button, and it flickered back on, scrolling through its morning start up routine.

 The machine scanned through all of the data in the three main system it was connected to and sorted all information into things that concerned him, could concern him, and did not before then sorting the first two categories into order of importance. As it did, he set up his screen reader so he would hopefully not start the day with more of a migraine than he already had. It took about 3 seconds for everything to turn on and settle.

Sitting down in his desk, he dismissed the notification that Remus had finished and submitted the report from their mission the day before.

 A mission had been scheduled for him today, and the details were in his inbox. A piece time travel technology had been accidently dropped by an archology student in the 1890s during a trip. It was an earlier model of emergency time travel given to time travels that would dump them back into the Registration Office in the year they originated. It wasn’t extremely dangerous, but could pose some problems, especially if someone who didn’t know what it was activated it.

Surveillance agents had tracked it down and found that it had been picked up by a local and sold. Though no one from that time had known what it was, they had identified that it was made out of a precious metal and it had been crafted into an expensive necklace. Janus and Remus were supposed to retrieve it today. It had been pinpointed that the most opportune time for the extraction was 1923 during a masquerade ball held by those who had bought the necklace.

 It was a fairly low stakes mission. He wasn’t set to leave for another couple of hours, so he clicked through the rest of the important notifications and then set off to meet his missions coordinator, Rhi, in her office.

Rhi and Janus got along fairly well. She was a well put together woman who took her job incredibly seriously. It was fair as her job was to organize all information and materials from every other department and make sure the agents she was assigned to got and understood all of it. A mistake from her could lead to an agent’s death or something far worse.

 This, of course, made her relationship with Remus… interesting to say the least. Janus could never place whether they were nemesis, frenemies, or mortal enemies, and he doubted he would ever know.

“Okay, but it’s the 1920s America,” Remus was already in her office arguing when Janus arrived. “There were so many gangsters! I could be a gangster. I would make a fantastic gangster! Just give me a gun, a snazzy suit with a white hat, and a buttload of alcohol. I will be running Chicago with Al Capone in five minutes.”

“Al Capone didn’t become a crime boss until 1925 and you are going to 1923,” Rhi said, sounding bored, “you aren’t going to Chicago, and as I have already stated, your cover is already decided.”

 “But-”

“It is nonnegotiable, Agent Clockson,” she said firmly. Remus pouted, but seemingly accepted his fate.

“May I come in?” Janus asked.

“Please do,” Rhi said. “You have been to the 1920s before, correct?” she asked Janus.

“Yes ma’am.”

She tapped the screen on her desk in response. “In the last two years?”

“About two months ago,” he responded. She tapped something else.

“Any blacks, reds, or yellows?” she asked.

“All green.”

“Great. Do you need a refresher course on basic cultural or linguistic procedures?”

“No.”

She pushed one more thing and then swiped the check-in document over to him. He glanced at the report stating he’d had no incidents of any level the last time he visited the 1920s and had opted out of the optional refresher course, and then pressed his finger against the screen to sign it with his fingerprint.

 The document returned to her side of the desk automatically. “Okay,” she said swiping another document from her left over to be in front of her. She twisted her wrist to copy it and slide copies to Janus and Remus. “Here are exact details on the time, place, and event you are going to, as well as details about your cover.” Janus scrolled through his quickly. It wasn’t as detailed as some he’d had considering this was a brief in-and-out missing, but he still took care to memorize everything on the page.

As he and Remus read through their things, Rhi got to her feet and turned to the storage compartments behind her desk.

 She grabbed out two packages and when they’d both signed that they’d read and understood the paperwork, she slid them across the desk to them. “These have everything you need,” she said. “Clothes, money, and an invitation to the party you’re off to attend. You are to get changed now, have a last check in with costuming to make sure everything is in order, and then report to decontamination in 23 minutes. Your set to leave in 38 minutes. Any questions?”

“How much-?” Remus started.

“None, agent,” Rhi said.

“But-”

“No alcohol,” Rhi said. “It is the prohibition era in the United States anyway.”

“Like there’s not going to be alcohol at the rich people party,” Remus said sullenly.

She pressed her lips together. “It is an in-and-out mission,” she said to both of them, and then turned to glare at Remus. “Do not get arrested.”

 “I don’t know,” Remus said joyfully. “I think I still have room for a 1920s mug shot on my wall.”

“Behave,” she said, “or I’ll report you for the cat you smuggled in from the 1800s.”

“You’d never,” Remus said. “You enjoy the cute pictures of Diesel Fuel I send you every day too much, and you know it!”

“Just… don’t get arrested.” She turned to Janus. “Don’t let him get arrested.”

“I’ll do my best,” Janus promised, standing. “Now come on, Remus, we need to get changed.”

“You just want to see me naked,” Remus replied with a wink, but he did stand.

 “If I see you naked one more time in my life Remus, my eyeballs will fall out of their sockets,” Janus said, waving to Rhi as he pulled Remus out of the door.

“Kinky.”

Janus’s eyeballs almost did fall out right then and there with how hard he rolled them.

They got changed quickly, Remus complaining and saying if he couldn’t dress like a gangster, he should at least be allowed to wear a flapper dress. Janus had long ago learned to ignore his ramblings. He did seem enthused about the included mask for the masquerade. It was a silver fox shaped mask with green accents that reminded Janus of the Egyptian God Anubis.

 Janus’s own mask on the other hand, was only designed to take up the left half of his face. It was mostly golden with a black swirled design. Attached to the side there was a plume of golden tipped white feathers. He had to give it to the costuming department, they did have good taste.

Once they were both dressed, they were poked and prodded by one of the costumers to make sure everything was accurate, fit right, and had been put on correctly.

After that, they went to the decontamination area to have themselves and everything they were taking with them sterilized so they didn’t accidently take any pathogens to the 1920s. They also received an oral vaccination to be sure they didn’t pick up anything from the 1920s and bring it back.

Then they were ready to go. The correct time-space coordinates had already been sent to their timepieces. With a push of a button, they were off.

  Inciting Incident

Chapter 3

Janus and Remus both appeared at the same moment a couple of feet apart in what looked like the inside of a garden shed. There was already a man waiting for them a few feet away. “Sup babes,” Remy said, just like he always did. The T-Agent looked their costumes up and down and whistled. “Now that,” he said, “almost makes me want to be one of you time jockeys.”

“They wouldn’t let me have a gun or a canister of moonshine,” Remus pouted.

Remy snorted. “Sorry, babes, but that makes my job a lot easier. If I’ve gotta fish you outta the 1920s criminal justice system, I’d rather it not be because you shot someone on accident ‘cause you don’t know how to use the safety.”

 Remus groaned dramatically. “Everyone is lame.”

Remy just shook his head. “Meet back here when you’ve got the necklace,” he said. “Don’t make a move until after 11:05pm and before 11:17. That’s your window.”

“We know,” Janus said. “See you then.”

“Have fun at the party boys,” Remy said and then lowered his shades to look at Remus, “but not too much fun.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said Remus, already towing Janus out of the garden shed. The way had been specifically cleared for them, so they met no other people before they’d rounded the house the party was taking place and had gotten onto the driveway in front of the house.

 Without missing a beat, they strolled up to the front of the house, just as a car pulled into the end of the driveway. Janus rang the doorbell, and a few moments later, a man who was clearly the butler answered the door. They handed over their invitation, and the man immediately let them in.

The party had already started when they slipped into the medium sized ballroom that had been decked out in streamers and other decorations. Janus’s nose immediately wanted to scrunch as the smell of sweat from all the dancing already going on as well as the too strong perfume meant to cover that stench wafted over him. It was by far not the worst smelling time period, but he was pretty sure some people still weren’t aware deodorant had been recently invented.

 He checked his time piece which had been disguised as a fancy wristwatch for this trip. “Okay,” he said. “We have about two hours before we need to make our move. We should…”

Remus’s attention was already being dragged away by a young man who seemed to be providing guests with food. “I’m going to go ‘mingle’,” he said, winking.

“No!” Janus hissed. “Re- Richard! No!”

Yet, he was already disappearing into the horde of stinky bodies, likely to go scandalize a bunch of rich folks, and leaving Janus alone. Janus mumbled a curse under his breath that he was sure no one around him would understand even if they could make it out.

 Unsure what to do with himself, he wandered over towards where the live musicians were playing jazz music, being sure to keep out of the way of the dancers. He was edging around the makeshift dancefloor, when one of said dancers must have misstepped and knocked into another one. The second man stumbled right towards Janus, arms pinwheeling. Janus reached out on instinct to catch the man as he fell.

There was a moment where the two of them just stared at each other, surprise evident on the other man’s face. He was wearing a mask that just covered the area around his eyes and the top of his nose, revealing a smattering of freckles across his cheeks that Janus imagined extended to his nose.

 The mask was a light blue velvet with a flower stuck on the side near his right ear, and a trail of curled golden ribbon bobbed down around his chin. The party continued on around them, a blur of movement and sound.

“Are you alright?” Janus asked.

The man blinked up at him and then tilted his head slightly to the side as though confused, before a smile slowly grew on his face. “Oh, I’m fine Dove.”

“Dove?” Janus asked.

He giggled. “You have dove feathers on your mask,” he explained, reaching up a hand to touch one. His finger brushed the tip of Janus’s ear, “and I don’t know what else I am supposed to call you.”

 “My name is Lee,” he automatically lied.

“Is it?” he asked, sounding amused. “Doesn’t seem to fit you well. I like Dove better.”

“Oh?” asked Janus. “And what’s your name so I can not call you that?”

The man chuckled. “Call me Pat.”

“Hello Pat,” Janus said.

“I thought you didn’t want to call me by my name.”

“I changed my mind.”

“Hmmm,” Pat said, finger tracing idly across Janus’s forearm which was when Janus realized with a start that he was still holding the man in his arms. He quickly went to release him, which Pat allowed with clear amusement.

 Yet, instead of completely stepping away, Pat grabbed Janus’s arm. “What are you doing all the way over here by the way?” he asked. “Don’t you want to dance.”

“Oh,” Janus hesitated. “I don’t really dance.” Or at least not in the way the people around him were. He’d had basic training for this style, but it had been a while and he was a bit rusty.

“Everyone dances Dove,” Pat claimed. “At least if they know the steps and have the right partner.”

“But I don’t know the steps,” Janus said with an eyebrow raise.

He hummed. “Well, I know the dance pretty well by this point,” Pat said. “Why don’t I teach you how it goes.”

 He was agreeing with the soft beseeching tone before he even realized it. Pat pulled him into the middle of the throng of people. He seemed to think, bopping his head to the music playing for a moment, before looking back at Janus. “Heard of James Johnson?”

Janus inclined his head.

“Well, have you heard his new song? Because there’s a dance that goes with it.”

He took a few steps away from Janus and started to dance. Despite his claim to know the steps, he wasn’t particularly good, but he made up for any loss of rhythm with pure enthusiasm.

 Janus found himself smiling at the man, and after a few moments, joined in with the dance. Despite his lack of practice, he ended up having a better natural rhythm than Pat. Pat didn’t seem to mind that he was being outperformed, however. On the contrary, he giggled at himself the couple of times he stumbled.

When he fell into Janus’s arms for the second time that night, Janus decided he’d probably had enough dancing for the moment and pulled him off to the side to get something to drink and cool down a bit.

He watched the man take a snack and some punch from one of servers and thank him happily before turning back to Janus. Pat was easily able to keep Janus’s attention as they chatted. He was bubbly and soft, and Janus found himself enchanted as they talked.

 He was explaining the steps of a different dance, a couples one. “Knowing how to perform the tango will entrance any girl you want,” Pat said, something mischievous sparkling in his eyes. “Assuming you’re that type of fella.”

“As opposed to what?” Janus asked.

Pat leaned in a bit closer. Not too much, but enough that he was definitely in Janus’s space. “A different type of fella,” he said simply, before smiling and leaning back.

Janus let out a shaky exhale and took a sip of punch. He glanced over at Pat. “Tell me about yourself, Pat,” he said.

Pat hummed in contemplation. “Well, I went to France recently.”

 “You did?”

“Oui, c'était amusant, mais j'ai eu des ennuis”

“What kind of trouble?” Janus asked curiously.

“Oh, the kind with a pretty boy and crepes that were way too sweet. Anyway,” he continued. “Other than that, I mostly help out my friend. He’s an inventor.”

“And how do you help him.”

He shrugged, “Running errands mostly, and making sure he gets enough sleep, because otherwise he gets distracted and forgets. And you?”

“I’m a banker,” he said, remembering his cover, but felt compelled to add, “but I like to travel as well.”

“You do look the type?”

“And how is that?”

   Pat shrugged. “I can always tell a wandering spirt from the masses, and you are easy to spot.” Pat looked at him then with a secret smile on his face, and Janus felt suddenly known, like the man in front of him had known him for years even though they’d only just met. Looking at him then, he wanted suddenly for that to be fact and not a flight of fancy.

He was brought firmly back to reality in the next moment. “Lee,” a pointed and familiar voice said. Janus’s head snapped up to see Remus, staring at him. He tapped his wrist. Janus glanced at his own wrist: 10:58pm. He just barely managed not to curse.

 “I,” he said looking up at Pat. “I’m sorry, but I have to go.”

“That’s okay,” Pat said easily. “It is getting rather late.”

“Yes,” Janus agreed. “Well… goodbye.”

Pat, titled his head, a half smile on his face. “I’ll be seeing you around.”

Janus nodded, and turned away from him towards Remus. He didn’t look back as they excited the ballroom. They snuck into a small side closet for coats that wasn’t being used as it was summer.

“So,” Remus said when the door closed behind them.

“Don’t,” warned Janus.

“I’m not one to judge,” Remus said.

“Shut up.” He glanced at his watch. It was 11:02. “We’ll go in 5.”

 “I have to give it to you. He was very cute.”

“We’re not talking about it.”

Remus just laughed joyfully, and Janus did his best to halt the blood rushing to his cheeks.

At 11:07, well into their window, they slipped back out of the closet, and towards the stairs as the party raged on.

Despite how Remus usually never shut up, he was able to be quiet when it counted. They snuck to the master bedroom of the home’s owners in silence. The door was already wide open by the time they got there, and Janus didn’t think anything of it. At least, he didn’t until they entered the bedroom, and there was someone already there.

 He turned from the dresser he’d been standing in front of to face them, sending Janus the same smile he had down in the ballroom. Janus and Remus both froze. “Sorry, sweetie,” Pat said. “Were you here for this too?” he held up the necklace they’d been sent for. He closed his fist around the charm made out of time travel tech.

“What?” Janus said.

Pat giggled and winked. “Unfortunately, I need it a bit more than you at the moment. So, I’m gonna have to go.” Janus stepped forward, not really sure what he was intending to do, but Pat just smiled. “See you some other time, my Turtle Dove.” With a snap of his fingers and loud crack, he disappeared. The mask he’d been wearing fluttered to the ground.

  Arc I: Finding Cinderella

Chapter 4

Janus was frozen in surprise for a few long moments after Pat disappeared. Which had been, admittedly, his mistake, because, while their window had technically been until 11:17pm and it was only 11:10, the loud crack that whatever Pat had been using for time travel made, garnered the attention of someone else.

“Uh oh,” Remus said, likely hearing footsteps. “Hide.”

That snapped Janus into action, but instead of hiding immediately like a sensible human being, he chose to go for the only link to the man who’d just stolen time travel tech and waltzed away, the mask.

Which was why he ended up getting arrested.

 Remy tsked the moment they were all alone in the police car having come to ‘transfer Lee to another facility.’ Remus was already waiting in the front seat, and flashed Janus a smug smile. If Janus wasn’t still handcuffed, he’d slap him.

“Well,” Remy said. “At least you didn’t shoot anybody like I asked. I was joking by the way. I didn’t really want to pick you up from a 1920s police station period.”

“It wasn’t my fault.”

“Mmm, nah, ‘cause Remus managed to not get arrested this time, so you defiantly screwed something up.”

“Oh, he defiantly wanted to screw something all right,” Remus said joyfully.

 “Remus,” Janus hissed.

“What?” he asked. “I’m not the horny one for once. Well, no, that’s a lie, but it didn’t affect the job this time.”

Janus groaned and leaned his head back against the seat.

Remy pulled into a seemingly random garage around 20 minutes later. “Alright,” he said. “Here we are.” He got out of the car and then helped Janus out before uncuffing him. “Here’s your ‘watch,’” Remy handed him the timepiece that had been confiscated when he’d been arrested.

Janus put it on and activated it. “Shit,” he said.

“What?” Remus asked.

“An appointment with cultural outreach has already been downloaded to my calendar for once we get out of decon.”

 “Oof. Going to baby jail,” Remy laughed. Remus was cackling.

“This,” Janus said, “was not a cultural faux pas. I did nothing that indicated that I was not from this time. I am not some rookie.”

“Don’t forget cell phones don’t exist in the 1920s,” Remus sang.

“The real question is whether or not my foot exists in your…” Remus disappeared before he could finish, a smirk on his face. Janus growled. “By Remy,” he gritted out. He selected the decontamination chamber from his queue, ignoring the appointment that came after it for now.

He knew exactly where Remus would be standing when he landed, which was why he stepped forward on reentry to ram into him.

 He yelped in surprise. “Sorry,” Janus said pleasantly. “I must have also forgotten landing procedures.

Remus laughed good naturally. “Aw, come on Jay,” he said, bumping Janus back, albeit much gentler than Janus had been. “It’s not a big deal. You just go talk with some crusty old college professor who is far too interested in spoons and then everything’s fine.”

“It’s the principle of the thing,” he growled. “They’re treating me like I’m an idiot who accidently invented disco in the 1920s when I was conned by some free agent time traveler.”

“‘Conned,’ Remus said. Is that what they’re calling it now?”

5238

“I know where and when you live Remus,” Janus said.

Remus gave him a dopey smile as the decontamination cycle finished and the door unlocked. Janus’s wrist buzzed telling him that the coordinates to the cultural outreach office were now unlocked. Instead of pulling them up, Janus walked to the door.

“Um,” Remus said, following him. “Aren’t you supposed to be going to your appointment?” Janus just kept walking towards their office. “Uh… Jan?”

“It’s absolutely ridiculous that I have to go to cultural outreach,” Janus said. “In fact, no one can make me. If they want me to go have a discussion about the definition of ‘bushwa,’ they’re going to have to have me dragged there.”

5356

“Mmm, I feel like The Boss won’t be too happy about that, and I have a feeling she’d be 100% down to dragging you there herself.”

“Well, then, let her,” Janus said, stalking through the door to his office. “I’m not going to…”

“Ah, Agent Picani,” the woman standing next to his desk, clearly waiting for him, said when he came through the door. “Dr. Picani was informed that there were complications with your last mission and wishes to have a conversation with you and asks that you meet him in his office at the AMO.”

“Oh, um,” Janus said, stumbling a bit before plastering on a regretful half smile. “Unfortunately, I actually have an appointment right now at Cultural Outreach. It’s mandatory and very important, and I have to go now. So, I’ll have to take a raincheck on that.”

 “But-” she started, frowning.

“Remus, work on the report!” Janus said quickly as he waved his hand to bring up his timepiece display and jammed his finger at the glowing appointment card in his queue. A few moments later, Janus was at Cultural Outreach.

Cultural Outreach was not part of the TPI, though it often worked very closely with them. It was a collaboration between the government and multiple universities to help government workers, politicians, and other citizens understand and bridge cultural gaps. It had existed before time travel was invented but had expanded to also teach people who needed to time travel how to behave in unfamiliar times and cultures.

 After it had to be expanded to provide for the TPI, it had been moved to Silver Mountains University. The building had once just been a museum, but it had been thoroughly renovated and there had been add-ons for office space and some classrooms. It was still a museum, however, its purpose had expanded greatly and there were many areas that were off limits to the general public.

One of these areas was the fourth floor, where Janus’s timepiece had dumped him. This was the floor that was almost exclusively for TPI agents and staff of Cultural Outreach who worked with them.

 He immediately turned away from the reception area, hoping that he could escape and go sit on the university’s quad or something of the like for the next hour or so in hopes the woman his brother sent to fetch him would give up and go back to the AMO. Yet, the receptionist apparently saw him.

“Janus Picani?” he asked.

Janus grimaced and turned back towards him. “Yes,” he said.

“Is something wrong?” he asked. “You’re 5 minutes late for your appointment and seem disoriented.

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Is your timepiece malfunctioning?”

“No.”

“Uh… okay. Well, if you sign in here, I can take you to your appointment.”

“…Fine.”

 He begrudgingly stepped forward and touched the screen he’d gestured to sign with his fingerprint, and then let the man lead him down the hall.

The door they stopped at was propped open slightly, but he still paused and knocked. “Professor Eran? Your 2:30 is here.”

Janus had just a moment upon hearing the name to think that maybe there was actually some sort of intelligent design of the universe and whatever being of ultimate power had crafted it was a dick.

The door opened and Virgil Eran’s eyes immediately narrowed on him. “Janus.”

“Virgil.”

“I see you’re still late for everything.”

“I see you’re still a bastard.”

 Janus saw the receptionist slowly back away in the direction they’d come.

“Why don’t you come in?” Virgil said faux pleasantly.

Janus did, because he really didn’t have much of a choice at this point unless he wanted to jump out of a window… or push someone out of a window.

Virgil turned back into his office and took a seat behind his desk. Janus unhappily followed him in and sat across from him.

He took his time pulling up whatever the TPI sent him and reading it over. “So, I see you failed your recovery mission and were arrested in 1923.”

 “It wasn’t like that,” Janus said. “I shouldn’t be here.”

Virgil gave him that same suspicious look he used to give Janus whenever Janus claimed to have not eaten his hot pockets out of the freezer in the middle of the night. He’d only been lying 80% of the time. Virgil had a tendency to forget what he’d eaten in a half-conscious state at 3 o’clock in the morning.

“I shouldn’t,” Janus snapped defensively. “Nothing went wrong with anyone from the time period. An illegal time traveler screwed up the mission details.”

“Well, it is still protocol to make sure nothing slipped when agents go off script. You weren’t prepared to be in a jail cell, and it is possible that you screwed something up.”

6168

“I didn’t screw anything up,” Janus growled.

“Alright,” Virgil said pulling up a document on his desk. “The mission started on July 27th, 1923 at 9:58pm, correct?”

“Oh, god, we’re not really going to fill out a time sheet. I don’t have time for that today.”

“It is protocol and best that the information is documented when it is still fresh in your mind. Besides, your schedule has been cleared for the rest of the workday.” The bastard was enjoying this. He knew how much Janus hated this stuff.

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” Janus said, “it was the damned illicit time traveler.”

“And I will be the judge of that,” Virgil said. Janus should have just bit the bullet and had coffee with his brother. “If you truly did nothing wrong, your supervisor will see that when I send this to her.”

[setabane]

The Beauty of Queer Intimacy and Love: The Dynamics of Femme Women loving Women (WLW) Relationships

This captivating series maneuvers around the beauty of everyday queer life and the documentation of queer love (platonic, romantic and of-self). A dialogue that contains a cinematography-focused visual aesthetic on tender and gentle moments with main inspirations from Clifford Prince King, Ryan McGinley and Ryan Pfluger.

Words: Cassim Cassim

There is a heavy stigmatism behind the word femme in its essence, especially when you coalesce and meld it with being queer. There is a shift in conflict whenever you are a queer femme identifying person, a shift that diverts hate and prejudice from the cis hetero community to the queer community. In the gay community, there is creation of internalized homophobia, which is known as femphobia, femme presenting queer men have been historically ostracized and ridiculed for presenting too girly or too feminine. Whereas in the lesbian community, there is an ambiguous reaction and opinion towards femme presenting queer women. There is a heavy dig into the existence of queer women, especially queer femme women who love other women.

Queer femme women must face a challenge amongst the heterosexual agenda and feeding into an idea that they must feed themselves into compulsory and performative ‘bisexuality’ all to praise the needs of men. Usually, women who are in femme relationships fall prey to this cage of men belittling their relationships by sexualizing them and praising their union because it is “sexy”, but God forbid a relationship between a butch queer woman and a femme queer woman, sensuality between them becomes “sick” and “cruel”. It widens the range of behavior considered acceptable from men in heterosexual intercourse, behavior which reiteratively strips women of their autonomy, dignity, and sexual potential, including the potential of loving and being loved by women in mutuality and integrity.

Femme to femme relationships in women are part of the forefront yet have never been seen as a redefinition of a generational idea of what queer love looks like. Without denigrating the idea that a wlw queer relationship is between butch and femme, it assumably feeds into the base idea that it belongs into a system of gender, the man and the woman, the provider and the receiver, simply because both expressions are dichotomic. It is rather cathartic knowing that now we don’t have a prominent base idea of what a queer relationship looks like or should look like, and that’s what makes queer relationships unique and splendiferous. This last article in the last series is to highlight the beauty of queer relationships, in all forms, and the subversion of the patriarchy by painting a soft and delegate form of femininity and queer intimacy between 2 femme women. SETABANE had an interview with 2 queer femme presenting woman discussing their idea of intimacy between women and their experiences with love and intimacy.

1. What is your definition of intimacy?

(J) My definition of intimacy is where me and my partner are together and we’re both tapping into each other’s emotional and mental inclination/state. It could be through just a casual conversation maybe about how your day really was or a deep conversation about the things you want for yourself or for the both of us. Allowing your partner to get in touch with your emotional being is the most intimate you can ever be with him/her (in my opinion). With physical intimacy, it’s more to do with being so comfortable with each other’s presence, their touch, having a good time and not involving sex. The latter on the other hand isn’t my way of showing intimacy.  

(C) Intimacy to me is defined as the complete acceptance of oneself and of other people. It’s being comfortable in my body and my spirit to share a bond with most importantly myself and then another person.

2. What is your idea of romanticism?  

(J) It’s definitely doing something, could be small or big, for my partner and not expecting anything in return, just making my partner feel so special. I could be doing whatever it is I’m doing out of love or admiration or for the fun of it. It also keeps the relationship alive, just little surprises here and there. Affirming your partner all the time counts too, as well as giving them your time, doing things out of the ordinary, basically being spontaneous.  

(C) Being aware of my own wants and needs and/or as well as my partners. Words or actions based off this form the base of the romantic aspect in any relationship.

3. What’s one thing you love about being queer?  

(J) I’d like to think it’s how I learn something all the time about being queer and the queer community. There’s so much to being queer that it just blows my mind sometimes. Anything thing is the support that comes from the queer community. It’s so overwhelming in a good way. It’s just incredible to see it and feel it.  

(C) The ability to be my most authentic self. The community as well. There is an abundance of love and generosity. We all share a commonality yet embrace individualism to the fullest.

4. Is queer expression important to you?  

(J) For me, I really do not think too much about how I express myself physically that is. I absolutely adore when queer people express themselves wholeheartedly that’s for sure, but for me, it never really wasn’t that important.

(C) Queer expression is vital. Without it, embracing one's true self cannot happen. Being queer takes up a portion of who the person is, if it cannot be tapped into and explored by physical means, it is left untouched and dormant.

5. Do you feel prejudice/discrimination as a queer woman in Botswana?  

(J) I personally haven’t really experienced/received that kind of energy from people, so I don’t think so. But for my fellow queer people, I’d like to think some have, especially trans, gay and bisexual men. They have it the hardest and it’s hard to witness that.  

(C) I have personally not experienced it

6. Do you believe in queer platonic love?  

(J) Yeah, absolutely.  

(C) Absolutely. Again, it’s the community. Friends come to be from sharing experiences and opinions, while accepting each other regardless of any differences. I don’t see why that cannot be for queer friendships. It can be one of the greatest friendships to ever have as a queer person.

7. What’s one advice you’d give to someone reading this?

(J) Don’t live up to people’s expectations of you. Live up to your expectations of you. Don’t be concerned about what other people think of you. Don’t focus on trying to prove to people your validation. And be kind, always. We live in such a cruel world and you can make it better by just being kind to the people around you.

(C) Study yourself. Expand your mind. Have some substance. We live in a world where distractions occupy our lives. But we weren’t put on this planet to become machines. Don’t lose your humanity, it’s the most beautiful thing you own. CREDITS:

PHOTOGRAPHY : @wenz_hd

EDITOR: @cxsside

MODELS: @jdee_ridge and @clarisapriyanka