#it's possible I will physically expire

[touchstoneaf]

TFW you know Amazon is evol and you shouldn't give them any money/time/exposure/free advertising... but also Prime holds in its giant greedy hands the entire source of your possible future sanity and happiness. And so you have to pump them and talk about them and their product as much as possible so you can continue to go on living in a world which is rapidly spinning out of control and where all you have to cling to is the possibility of season 3 of Good Omens.

Yeah. That feeling.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

I thought I'd keep my Emotional Support Fic Yearly Reread for september/october when I'll be stressed out of my mind living alone with paperwork and schoolwork to do but actually I think right now is a good time

[breelandwalker]

How to Write Your Own Spells

There are lots of ways to create spells, from planning everything to the minutest detail ahead of time to absolutely flying by the seat of your pants in the moment. If you'd like to write your own spells, either for use in your craft or as a creative exercise, here are some suggested steps that I use in my own practice:

1) Determine the intent or goal of your spell. Decide, first and foremost, what you want the spell to do. Refine your goal if necessary and try not to be too nebulous. Your intent tells the spell what it's meant to do. A more focused goal may increase the chances of success.

2) Determine how you want the spell to manifest. Decide how the spell should work and what the result should look like. This is a good time to build in a sign of success, especially for spells that may not work in an obvious or visible way.

3) Determine what or whom the spell will affect. If the spell is to have a target, be it a person or a place or an animal or an object, decide what that should be and how they or it will be represented in the casting.

4) Determine how long the spell is meant to work. If your spell is timebound or has a deadline, decide what that will be. If the spell is meant to work long-term, you may want to check in and refresh it from time to time. (Not every spell will be timebound. Many spells will simply expire when they have fulfilled their purpose or if they are blocked or circumstances are not favorable.)

5) Determine the timing of the spell, if applicable. Not everyone uses celestial or astrological timing for their spells, but if you do, look into the prevailing conditions and decide on an advantageous time for your casting. (Please note that magical timing can only enhance your spell and casting something on the "wrong" day will not necessarily cause it to fail.)

6) Determine what methods and materials you want to use to cast the spell. Decide how you're going to go about performing the casting, whether you're doing a ritual or making a charm or just using energy. If you're going to need a ritual space or physical components, plan that out and make sure it fits with what you want to do.

7) Determine the words, if any, which will empower the spell. If you want to include a prayer or a petition or a song or an incantation with your spell, decide what that should be. This is not strictly necessary and the words need not be spoken aloud. (Rhyming incantations are not required, but if you prefer them that way, you can certainly do so.)

8) Prepare the materials for casting the spell. Get all your necessaries together ahead of time. Make sure you have everything you need, that tools and components are in good and useable condition, prepare your workspace, and make sure everything is within easy reach so you don't have to stop and search for things in the middle of your casting. (And for goodness sake, if you're working with open flame, observe fire safety and tie your hair and sleeves back.)

9) Finalize details and perform the casting. When you're ready to begin, try to eliminate as many possibilities for distraction or interruption as possible. Go over your spell and components one more time, then proceed with casting the spell.

10) Record the particulars for future reference and to determine how well the spell worked. Make a record of the spell, including your goal, how it should manifest, the words and components used, the date of the casting, the casting method and procedure, and how the casting went. If there are any additional details or observations that seem important, include those as well. This will serve as a useful learning tool in the future and will allow you to check your work if the results make themselves known.

It's useful to write spells from time to time if the inspiration strikes you, in order to better understand how they fit together and how they work. Plus it's a fun and creative journaling exercise and recording the spells you cast a great way to measure your progress later on.

For additional tips on writing your own spells and helpful tricks for using timing and available materials to your advantage, check out my podcast, Hex Positive, Eps. 006-007, "Come In For A Spell, pt 1 & 2."

(And if you’re enjoying my content, please feel free to drop a little something in the tip jar or check out my published works on Amazon or in the Willow Wings Witch Shop. 😊)

Happy Witching! 🔮✨

[visionsofcarnality]

can we get headcanons for gilf!Joel maybe? his slicked back hair in tlou ep3 stirred something in me 🥵🥵🥵

i like the way you think…

Silver Fox ! Joel Miller Headcanons NSFW!!

Traditional old man in every sense of the word, he doesn’t make cheesy comments when you grab a door handle but he does give you a scolding little glare that totally doesn’t light a fire in your panties.

Self conscious about his somewhat saggy skin around his chest, middle, and extremities even after you’ve assured him until you’re blue in the face. You do help him though. Watching how attracted you are to his body even aged as it is definitely strokes his ego.

Has an online refillable prescription for Viagra that gets delivered to his apartment, and when he takes it he becomes an absolute fiend.

Usually without the Viagra he still is able to throughly satisfy you with ages of foreplay and a nice thorough fucking, leaving you both satisfied after one climactic round.

But when he takes Viagra-

You better clear your schedule and invest in a massage gun for your legs afterwards because you are going to be SORE.

I’m talking several positions, screaming until your throat hurts, your pussy feeling raw and used, daylong marathon sex.

Joel doesn’t seem to soften even a fraction until your body is wailing in protest and you can’t feel your thighs anymore.

You don’t think he could possibly have any more left in him until he’s once again emptying his heavy, full balls into your cunt; adding to the previous loads from the past six rounds he’s already shot into your body.

When he’s not fucking you stupid with the assistance of his little blue pills, he’s treating you like the princess you’d expect he would.

Don’t even think about carrying your own groceries, what are you, crazy?

Speaking of groceries…

If you aren’t living together yet best believe he’s on your doorstep every Sunday at 11AM with a truck full of groceries, dropping them off after church let’s out and he’s free to go to the store.

He makes you sit and continue sipping your coffee/tea while he puts them away, simultaneously checking the sell-by dates of everything in your fridge and pantry like a man obsessed.

Like a true old fashioned southern boy, he won’t tell you he’s in love with you. But he will point out the amount of things expired in your house.

“Come on, now. You’re gonna get sick, this is ridiculous-“ As if he hasn’t brought you your favorite brand of cereal and all your preferred snacks. Even all those “Shitty, organic, cardboard crap” things you love.

Never had a good plate of grits? He’s making them meticulously for you the morning after a hookup. “Eat, you need it. That stuff’ll keep you goin’ all day.”

Is all too supportive of your flimsy little sundresses. The gauzy fabric floating around your legs like a visualization of your perfume, nearly beckoning him closer. Even when you’re looking like a good little church girl in your soft, flowy dresses… all he can think about is how easy it would be to bend you over and have his way with you.

Which he does the second he brings you home from his cousin’s cookout in the suburbs.

Did I mention that he got a vasectomy after his divorce? Still, seeing you with his now adult daughter makes him daydream about getting you pregnant.

Which he finds insane… He doesn’t want any more kids, he physically can’t have any more kids… But the only thing he can think about right now is burying his cum in your pussy and keeping you pampered in his house with your belly full of his babies.

That vasectomy won’t stop him from trying his damndest, though. Especially after Sarah (who he had young) has her first baby and he watches you hold the six month old infant for the first time.

This man is a GENTLEMAN in the most old fashioned sense of the word.

Like, I cannot stress that enough.

If you’re an independent person, prepare to be thoroughly pampered.

His old fashioned chivalrous ways may be frustrating sometimes but it really does come from a place of just wanting to show his love.

Like when he insists on driving you everywhere whenever you go places together, or when he always finds a way to move you to the side of his body furthest away from the sidewalk when you walk, or when he automatically picks up your purse when you meet so that he can carry it for you.

But you forget all about those minor annoyances when he bends you over your kitchen table and pounds you into next week, muttering nonsense about how you’re too young for him or how you’re such a dirty girl for wanting him and his old man cock.

You moan his name when he grips both your hips in a tight but loving hold, all too willing to forgive him for his incessant door opening when you’re all dumbed down on his cock, the cock which is now way too hard and blood filled because he definitely popped one of your favorite blue pills a while ago.

But much like the gentleman he is, after he fucks you into a blissed-out stupor, he carries you to the bed and wipes your spent pussy clean, cuddling you into the mattress and running his hands through your hair while you both come down from your highs.

When he does get insecure about the age difference between you, all you can do is kiss his leathery, stubbled cheek and wrap your arms around him… Convincing him with your actions instead of words that his age is only a factor in your attraction to him… And that you love him for what makes him him.

this post got way too long but NONNIE I HOPE I DID YOU JUSTICE!!

[weepingtalecowboy]

Random but I just noticed that Wind can essentially use his Windwaker to mind control someone with the command melody

Like if he decides to throw away his morals he could annihilate an entire army without even involving himself in it

He can summon tornadoes to move but also those are tornadoes he could just go and kill every monster possible with them

He can change the wind and therefore he can also control airflow and just deny someone air by moving it away

Like your free trial for air has expired have fun choking

That is a crazy powerful ability if you are creative with it

Not to forget hyoi pears that allow him to control seagulls it would be such a good ability for spyware considering how inconspicuous it is and if you decide to stretch the whole thing out to be able to control any bird it gets even more dangerous because killing any bird on sight is hard and it would still end up with Wind knowing everything even if the bird is dead

But also in phantom hour glass he was able to stop time for himself and was able to walk through walls

Like if Twilight can keep his ability to become a wolf then wind still having some form of access to the spirits abilities would be cool too (even if it is a stretch considering that they are in another realm but considering that Cielia promised to always protect his dreams from nightmares it could maybe work out considering that it literally is fanfiction so…)

Also the amount of combo potential that mind control would allow :

Be it a mind link to everyone to communicate

Wind controlling fierce deity to make sure that time can take the mask off

Or just stopping an enemy from attacking

Even interrogation would be extremely dangerous because you can not resist well against mind control nor can you resist for long

Like essentially in Hyrule Warriors he would be one of the most useful and terrifying soldiers possible just for his spyware and his mind control alone

Adding his physical strength and his magical power he is even more impressive for an army leader who desperately needs soldiers

But it is just something I noticed

It would be pretty fun in fanfiction though

[flowerfreya]

Emotions

Part 6 of The Office AU

Pairing: John Price x Soap x Ghost x Gaz

Content: I saw a post that said a lot of poly 141 is actually just RH , which made me want to give backstory on the 141 and the lore

There is gay smut in this so minors DNI

Masterlist

They all met each other when they got recruited to be in a special task force that was made up entirely of SPECOP soldiers, Johnny for explosives, Gaz for communications , Simon for security, and John was the leader of it all. They trauma bonded, hard. They got close, closer than a lot of other special groups usually do. They were away from other humans other than themselves for almost 6 - 9 months out of the year. They went through everything together. One mission changed everything. 

It was cold , they were in Serbia doing recon in a safe house that maybe housed the spies that the brass has been looking for when they were spotted. A gunshot pierces Johnny in the leg and then another shot appears where his foot just was. Price is yelling , trying to get a nine line out here but it’s too hostile, too remote, too far. Johnny thinks he’s going to die, he sees all his blood in the snow and thinks this is it. 

“I love you”, he whispers, to no one specific because he is saying  it to all of them. Gaz is trying to stop the bleeding, making a tourniquet, shakes his head with a grim look on his face doesn’t respond, can’t respond. Sounds like a goodbye to him so he doesn’t respond and continues to try to stop the bleeding. 

“Shut the fuck up”,Ghost growls. He looks down and sees that Johnny's eyes are closed and gives him a little slap, “you're not dying that easy on me”. He sounds mad but his eyes are frantic, looking from Price to Gaz, to Soap’s leg and then back again. He can’t lose him because he knows if they lose Soap , they won’t recover after this they won’t. Price is screaming over the radio, just flat out ignores Soap goodbye because it’s not to him and he will be able to say it back tomorrow. They won’t give him the evac, stating that a helo won’t be able to land there without being hit by the hostiles. 

“We can clear the hostiles”, Price affirms. 

Ghost isn’t the best sniper out of the group but compared to the rest of the division he is ranked top three. He takes them out with three bullets, one for each person. When he lift the mirror from the quickly built cover and nothing happens , they quickly and carefully as possible haul Soap to the safe house. It’s bare, only a fire going and almost expired can be good but it’s a shelter. The evac takes 5 hours to get there. Johnny is sweating but every once in a while would complain of being cold. He’s pale and exhausted. He doesn’t get mad when they shake him away every time he closes his eyes. He knows he’s close to death but when he looks at Price’s face and it purr agony anytime he looks at him, Soap knows that he needs this, if this is all he can do to make him feel better he will do it. 

“After this, I’m done”, Simon speaks up, he looks down at the floor but he sounds resolved like he’s made up his mind. 

“Me too”, Gaz argrees. 

“Me too”,Soap whispers , he tries to raise his hand but Ghost gives him that if wasn’t already dying, Ghost would do it. Price just nods because even though his career is his life, what is the point when the people that he loves are not there with him. There is none. 

“Me too”,Price says.

~

When Soap finally gets out of the hospital after three weeks and two surgeries , he’s prescribed physical therapy and an honorable discharge. The rest of the boys take a minute to get that same honor but when they do , they take the night to celebrate. 

They are drunk, having brought the most expensive bottle of whiskey and mead that Price has. And they get drunk, they get horny. Someone suggested strip poker, “I don’t know how to play poker”, Gaz exclaims. 

“Come sit in papa’s lap , will help you”, Price is patting his lap and Gaz takes a seat already feeling his length against his ass. The game doesn’t even progress past the first pass before they migrate to the bed. Gaz lets out a mewl as Soap licks from the top of his cock and then gives the best rimjob that he’s ever received in his life. He grips Price’s shoulder as he lets out a needy hum into his mouth, thrusting up into the air looking for any type of friction and receiving none. “Please”, he whimpers. 

“Please, what”, Simon says. But Simon already knows what he wants and is prepped enough to give it. He swings his legs over Gaz and gently lowers himself onto his cock letting a low and slow growl as Gaz lets out a curse , “so warm, feels so good”, his eyes rolling into the back of his head.

Price grabs Gaz’s hand and places it on his hard cock and envelopes his hand to move up and down, he lets out a broken gasp , “Keep doing that baby”, he whispers in his ear. Ghost grabs the back of Soap's head and holds him there, Soap makes a filthy wet noise, his hips moving up and down against Gaz’s leg getting off the all the noise and just rimming him in general.

Gaz hips stutter inside of Ghost, Ghost grabs on to his own cock and sets a bruising pace , which Gaz matches on Price’s cock. Let out a collective variety of curse words before warm cum is all over Gaz and inside Simon. Soap lifts off of Gaz and gives a dirty kiss to Simon and then Simon gives a nasty and loud kiss to Price with Gaz reaching over Simon’s shoulder to give Soap a kiss.

Price get’s up to go to the bathroom to get them all cleaned up with Soap going to the kitchen to get a large water bottle. Ghost and Gaz are cuddling, with Gaz holding Simon talking sweet nothing in his ear with him already dozing off. Price gets everyone cleaned up and Soap makes sure everyone gets some water, then they get into a giant ass bed that of course Price custom made and goes to sleep , because tomorrow Price has an interview for a new permanent receptionist.

[heartfullofleeches]

dude abby is so fire can we get more hcs or a snippet i beg

It's been a hot minute since I've done HCs and they give me excuse to flesh out my characters so we'll do with that-

Abby [Rental Zombie Spouse HC]

Warnings: Dismemberment, Mentions of death

-

Abby doesn't remember much about himself before he died. Everything predating the night he woke up in the back alley behind a restaurant witu a hole in his head is a blur to him. All he had to his person was a wallet, his phone, and the keys to an apartment - none of which helped jog his memory as the man the ID inside the wallet couldn't possibly be him.

As recently established, Abby earns money by hosting services where he will be the customer's partner- There are a handful of male options, but he prefers to pose as females in his disguises because those usually pay more and he likes the dress up.

While Abby doesn't require human flesh as his only food source, he can eat chunks of it to repair rotting or damaged tissue. He can also swap out parts that are no longer useful with fresh ones which is a major factor to how successful his business is since changing a few features makes him a completely new person. He has a deep freezer in his apartment where he keeps his "accessories" until they expire.

When it comes to what he likes in a Darling not even Abby knows. He's very easily distracted by things and an encounter with him trying to cut out a part of you he likes can instantly switch to yout first date of many just by him seeing you like that peeks his interest as well.

"Hey, You! Cute eyes you got... Mind if I borrow them?.... Oh! What are you listening to?... I love this band! I think.... Maybe the old me did. Let's listening to more songs together and find out!"

Since you would probably like to keep all your limbs, Abby steals physical objects that belong to you to feel closer to you. He would insist on something like matching tattoos or piercings since if you can't share the same flesh - you can at least have the same branding. Do not leave any jewelry or clothing that may fit him unattended.

Any body part that was at one tethered to him will still be usable even if it's separate from him as long as it's functional. There's a reason he always knows what you're thinking- he's got eyes and ears everywhere. Please don't throw them out if you happen to find any. :(

You'll almost never meet him when he isn't "Abby". When he doesn't care about his appearance or how bad the state of his decay is and just slaps on a hoodie and a face mask to get around. It's how he keeps watch on you without use of his spare eyes and sorta feels like how some people without their makeup.

He/him, but doesn't care about whatever pronouns his clients use for him.

Spends his money on brand new items for you, but goes broke buying second hand goods from yard sales and thrift stores because he loves older furniture and giving things a new home... Will pawn his junk off on you when he has strength in your relationship that you won't leave or make fun of him for his odd purchases.

"Why do you mean "why did I buy twenty cassette players"?? If you use the one I bought you already are a diary, I wouldn't have to stalk you as frequently!"

[dovesndecay]

Hey! I saw your post on diet culture and fast food and wanted to know what you mean about "diet culture would rather us starve than admit fast food is an accessible food resource"? Could you elaborate? (sorry for the paraphrase, I'm on mobile.) Thanks!

So, I'm disabled in a number of ways. I struggle really hard with executive function, appetite, sensory issues, and pain/fatigue/brainfog that makes deciding on food, and then following the process of making that food very difficult on a good day.

I've always had food issues -- I've snuck whole mouthfuls of food I could not physically make myself eat into the bathroom to spit it out in the toilet because I'd been told I had to eat it. I've puked from the texture of food. And I've gone hungry because food that was prepared is food I could not eat, for a number of reasons.

I'm also really fucking poor. I cannot work a regular job anymore. Groceries have actively skyrocketed to the point where our household is spending less than HALF of what we should be for the number of people. The difference between buying a bunch of groceries that we may or may not eat before they expire or our tastes for them die and simply purchasing a meal from a fast food joint is literally just the cost of labor -- saving us from expending spoons on deciding, buying ingredients, preparing, cooking, and then eating that food, which I will again stress that we might not actually eat.

There's only so many times you can have Walmart brand chicken nuggets before you physically cannot choke it down again.

Diet culture has a huge focus on eating the "right" kind of foods as well as this weird "self-sufficiency" fetish for cooking that can be fine but has a bad habit of edging into ableism. If you physically cannot cook on a regular basis, for any reason, and you have a lot of fast food meals, you get judged a lot for it. It's labeled "unhealthy" and "lazy". I am often told that I just "haven't found the right recipes" or "cooking hacks". No, man, I'm just fucking disabled.

Personally, I'd label starving as more unhealthy than eating fast food, but people don't like hearing that you aren't willing to swallow whatever gruel society thinks people in poverty deserve to have.

For me, fast food is predictable, safe, filling, often less expensive, convenient, spoons-saving, and it means I will eat. I also just genuinely think a lot of fast food tastes good. Sure, it's not fresh veggies and fruits, but I'm not getting those anyway. When I buy groceries, it's the cheapest items possible which means a lot of frozen foods, packaged pastas, and cereals.

And this isn't even looking at food deserts where grocery stores are few and far between, but fast food chains are everywhere. Even my Louisiana hometown, boasting a population of 10,659 people as of 2020, has a Burger King, McDonald's, Hardee's, Wendy's, Taco Bell, Popeyes, and numerous pizza delivery places. Y'know what closed down though? The Piggly Wiggly, one of the more affordable grocery stores -- my grandmother actually worked there during my childhood -- and I don't think the Winn-Dixie is even open there anymore either. So all they've got is a Walmart.

Fast food is an accessible food resource, and diet culture would rather see us starve than acknowledge that.

[herejusttosufferalong]

So did N post the Brazil restaurant pics and talk about it in an interview (a bit randomly) because she knew a lot of people were taking pics of them, and she wanted to control the narrative? Play it down and hush rumours? I don't recall her posting any other dinner photos during the tour?

Given the precise timing, I suspect the new photos/video that were released today may have been taken by staff who were under a 90-day NDA (from Part 1 release). I know of other photos that were posted in real time of L and N at the hotel restaurant. For some reason, they were not restricted to post? Maybe just a casual diner or guest? It just occurred to me that the two photos of them (on different nights) taken from a distance may have been screenshots from a video, as the quality is so poor? That's an interesting thought.

Then there's the NY Premiere videos. Why were some released in real time while others were released precisely 90 days after the release of part 1? Why would NDAs apply to some people but not others? Unless the videos posted today were purely by influencers via their official accounts and the other videos posted in real time were from random guests and anonymously leaked?

I'm confused as to why NDAs would be in place? Is it just a safeguard in case anything scandalous happened that would effect viewership numbers? And in the case of the Brazil hotel, just a general privacy thing? But why would it be limited to 90 days if that's the case? Unless they thought something would happen at the hotel that could effect viewership numbers?

Idk. I'm so confused about today. Particularly when you pair it with the week of posting from N. No surprises she posted something social awareness related today (all eyes on her) either because she anticipated today's events OR she had a look at her socials and saw that things had been posted and wanted to make the most of public interest. But still, why the lead up with her own cryptic and love-struck posts? And radio silence from L and all adjacents since he posted the Bridgerton bloopers?

Here are my key takeaways from today (and this week):

They spent a shit ton of time together in Brazil, and didn't get sick of each other. Even going to two separate restaurants in the hotel on one night. They had at least two outings together, without their teams in earshot, across two nights.

He enjoys grabbing her hand unnecessarily just as much as she enjoys grabbing his. Their level of physical affection is unsettling to me, even when certain adjacents are around.

Certain adjacents are just hanging around, whether they know they're being filmed or not. Where is the affection or physical comfort?

A few days before the Premiere, N posts a song about waiting for someone, asking them to give her 'a look again' to get things going. Then in the week leading up to the end of a 90-day period from Part 1 release (and possible NDA expiration), she proceeds to post about someone giving her a call after not hearing from them in a while, and admitting their love for one another (the caller expressing their feelings first). She then posts a song about getting it on with a person where there's no pretending, who knows her so well. Someone who makes her want to dress up and go dancing. Makes me think of that song she posted after S3 filming (I think) and possibly again during tour? - "we should kiss like real people do". What's this whole theme about pretending vs. reality? Being real/yourself vs. fake? What's this in relation to? I mean, I have a few theories...

I can feel it in my loins that the next few days are going to be enlightening, and could literally go in any direction. But did any of us predict this turn of events in what was suppose to be the 'dry period' before s4 filming begins??? This is honestly the best show I've ever watched.

.

[headkiss]

could I request joel and shy!reader, the first time that they share a bed/spend the night together? she learns that even though he is a grumpy old fart he is also a huge cuddler? I love your writing for joel!!

grumpy old fart made me giggle! here u go lovely!!! | 0.8k fluff

It feels like you’ve been walking for days, the heel of your beat-up shoes rubbing uncomfortably against your skin, your backpack feeling heavier and heavier on your shoulders.

Somehow, Joel looks unfazed. Of course, he’s got dirt all over and you’re sure he is tired, but he doesn’t look it. He’d probably keep walking until he physically couldn't anymore.

You don’t complain, because everyone’s tired and sore, and the last thing you’d want to do is cause trouble or annoyance.

Still, when you spot a motel in the distance, the relief washes over you.

There’s only one room left in the place that’s sleepable now, the rest of them blocked off or broken down from debris and years of being empty. Well, it’s technically two rooms; a door in between to conjoin them, and Ellie quickly claims one of them as her own for the night.

She shuts the conjoining door behind her, probably to have the privacy to clean up as much as possible with whatever’s in her bag.

You and Joel stand in silence for a bit, the one bed in the room sticking out a little too obviously.

“I can take the floor,” you offer.

“No, you take the bed.”

Joel’s stubborn, and cold, and often grumpy, but it doesn’t stop you from liking him. He’s risking his life to save the girl in the next room, and no matter how aloof he acts, the way he looks out for you says enough.

He’s a good man, even if he doesn’t believe it himself.

“What about your back?” You know it’s been bothering him, “you need it more than I do.”

“We’ll just share, alright?”

Joel suggests it before he really thinks it through, because he might have a hard time sleeping next to you. It’s to no fault of your own, really, he just doesn’t know how much longer he can keep you at arm’s length when he has this stupid fucking urge to hold you and protect you with all he has.

He’s not sure how someone like you wound up with someone like him, but he wouldn’t dream of complaining.

“Oh, yeah. Sure,” you say.

You like Joel more than you should and the thought of sleeping next to him has your nerves flaring. You’ve never slept next to him before, even when the body heat would’ve been helpful.

You’re quiet throughout dinner (a can of long expired Chef Boyardee split between three), busy thinking, trying to get your shit together because you shouldn’t be nervous. It’s just a bed. It’s Joel.

Happy with her meal, Ellie goes back to her room to read one of the new comic books you’d found a bit ago, leaving with a, “goodnight, dudes.”

Then, it’s just you and Joel again.

He cleans up the food as you pull back the blankets on the bed to assess the sheets. You decide on grabbing your sleeping bags and unzipping them to use as blankets instead.

“The ones on the bed are pretty gross,” you say when Joel peeks over at you, like you needed to explain yourself.

Joel knows you well by now, knows your tells and quirks, and he can see that you’re nervous, off, hands smoothing out the sleeping bags shakily.

“I can take the floor if you’re uncomfortable,” he says, walking over to you.

“No!” You answer quickly, “it’s not that. I’ve just- um, never shared a bed with anyone before.”

“You don’t have to do anything different. Just gotta sleep, okay?”

Right, just sleep, this isn’t special. You’ve gotta get a grip.

“Yeah, okay.”

“If you’d rather we can put the pillows in the middle.”

There he goes again, caring for you in small, simple ways that speak volumes.

“No, that’s alright.”

“Best get some sleep, then.”

You nod, and Joel walks around to the other side of the bed. You both climb in, laying on your backs for a bit. You can't seem to sleep, and he seems to notice.

“You good?”

“Huh?” You turn your head to look at him, cheek against the pillow, “yeah, fine.”

Joel lays on his side to face you, a distance clearly left between your bodies, “try to sleep, will you? You need it.”

“So do you.”

You’re on your side now, too, head level with his.

“I know.”

Your hand lays by your face on your pillow, and Joel’s hand inches towards it, his pinkie brushing against yours. You reach yours back, and then, your fingers are locked.

“Goodnight, Joel.”

“Night.”

You don’t know it but he falls asleep long after you, and by the time you wake, you’ve migrated, shifted positions. There’s a heavy weight over your waist, and only when you peek under the blanket do you realize that it’s Joel’s arm.

Then, you realize your head isn’t on the pillow anymore, but on his chest, the steady thump of his heart beneath your ear.

Rather than shift and wake him, you close your eyes and get a couple more hours of sleep, smiling at the discovery that Joel Miller is a cuddler.

[k-rising]

Pick a card: who's the love of your life?

DISCLAIMER: readings are used as a guide, but the decisions you want to make for yourself are YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. this is for entertainment purposes only.

☞ choose a pile that draws your attention the most.

☞ you can choose more than one option, but I recommend that you stick with the first one you chose.

☞ readings don't have an expiration date.

⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟏ㅤ ㅤㅤ ㅤ𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟐ㅤ ㅤ ㅤㅤ𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟑

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟒ㅤ ㅤㅤ ㅤ𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟓ㅤ ㅤ ㅤㅤ𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟔

⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟏

You have already met the love of your life. For some of you, it may be your current partner. For others, it may be a person with whom you have already established some kind of bond or conversation. For some of you, the love of your life is someone who's getting out of a relationship and for others you're going to be getting out of a relationship when you meet them.

This person is sentimental, but strong-willed. Throughout their life they experienced many things that forced them to fight in order to achieve their dreams; they don't give up easily. This person is a leader who inspires others. However, it's very difficult for this person to rest; they're stressed 24/7.

The love of your life is a passionate person who wants to form deep bonds with others. They're calm, but that doesn't mean they are not adventurous. The love of your life is someone who is in touch with their emotions and intuitions and knows how to channel their feelings very well.

For some of you, the economic level of this person is going to be very good and very stable. This person knows how to keep and take good care of their money.

In a relationship, this person is passionate, loyal, loving, and highly protective. They really like physical contact and spending quality time with you. I feel like they freak out if you don't text them back or if you don't ask them out… like I said, they're very sentimental.

Some red flags of this person are that they can be very capricious when they don't get what they want and sometimes they want to have more than they already have. They can also become very overprotective of you.

I feel like there's going to be a big effort on their part to get closer to you. Like I said, this person doesn't give up easily and is going to do whatever it takes to make you theirs.

Physical appearance: brown hair / fantasy hair color

Possible signs: Cancer / Scorpio / Virgo / Sagittarius

Things that may be relevant: letters "I" and "V"

⸻

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟐

The love of your life is an optimistic, cheerful, charismatic and popular person. They really like celebrations and socializing. They also may have a very large group of friends.

However, I feel that the image that this person wants to give sometimes is not what they really are. Although they have noble intentions, it's hard for them to put themselves in another's place. They tend to doubt their own abilities a lot and I also feel that they don't know how to appreciate the opportunities that life gives them, since later, when they lose that opportunity, they realize how much it could have helped them.

At first, when you two meet, you may clash a lot, since you both have different personalities.

The love of your life is in love with their family and it's very likely that they want to have a family with you. I'm visualizing a very cheerful and colorful house where children can run all over the place.

This person is so intelligent and observant that they know when people lie to them. The love of your life always bets on the truth and knows very well what they want. They're a very mature and practical person, and if they have any problem they like to talk straightforwardly.

The love of your life is a very funny and curious person. They love sharing their ideas and learning new things. That's why mental stimulation is very important in this relationship, otherwise they will get bored.

Some red flags of this person, which I have already mentioned a little above, is that I feel that they're more mental than sentimental. They have a hard time expressing their feelings and many may consider them to be a cold and apathetic person. I feel that this person is like this because of an unresolved trauma… There were many moments when they felt alone and rejected and this made them force themselves to get going and downplay that emotional part that they have.

Physical appearance: brown hair / blonde hair / voluptuous body

Possible signs: Capricorn / Virgo / Cancer / Leo (earth and air signs may be prominent in their chart)

Things that may be relevant: letters "L", "H" and "S"

⸻

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟑

Just like pile 1, you may already know the love of your life. For some of you, they may have already formed some kind of bond with you, and for others, they just talk to you from time to time.

This person is empathic, generous, nostalgic and calm… but they're also very insecure of themselves, feeling that they are never prepared to face any kind of problem that comes their way.

Regarding work, I feel that they worked very hard throughout their life. However, they always had difficulties finding a stable job. They know a lot about different areas, but no matter how much they know, they work extra hard regardless of their results. Their whole life was based on making sacrifices in order to survive… and this also applies to their romantic relationships. The love of your life is capable of leaving their comfort zone in order to make their relationship more bearable.

Although they're a sentimental person, there are times when they put their feelings aside and get serious when necessary. They're a very calculating, independent and organized person; they know very well what they want and how they want it.

They're also persevering and very competitive. They like to have everything under control.

They overthink a lot and often make bad decisions. That's why they have to think twice before making a final decision.

They take good care of their money and they may have a good economic level.

Some red flags of this person are that they are stubborn and can be quite overprotective of money. This is very subjective, but it could be that they propose you to open the couple or something like that… conventional relationships are not their thing… and, for others, the love of your life may be prone to cheating.

Physical appearance: brown hair / black hair

Possible signs: Aries / Virgo / Aquarius

Things that may be relevant: letter "C"

⸻

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟒

The love of your life is someone who is very hardworking and who has been able to achieve one of their biggest dreams with great responsibility.

This person is courageous, determined and cheerful; they're a natural leader who inspires others.

Their family may have a very popular family business.

Speaking of their family, I feel that it plays a very important role both for better and for worse. In some cases, this person may be the firstborn child or the favorite child. Whatever the case may be, the love of your life lived under constant pressure throughout their life, but they always prioritized their dreams over their parents' dreams. I also feel that the image that the family tries to give is not what it really is.

In some cases, the love of your life may be a foreigner and, for others, not… However, whatever your case may be, this person wants to move from their home to be able to make a new life somewhere else and detach themselves from that toxic environment that surrounds them. Also, if they manage to move, there's a good chance that they will do better at work.

The love of your life is a calm but sociable person. They don't like confrontations and always seeks for meaning on everything they do.

When they're upset, they like to be alone to be able to reflect. And, regarding their work, they know how to take breaks when they considers it necessary.

They have great job potential and I feel that when you finally get in a relationship with them, they will do even better.

This person knows that everything has its cycle and that not everything is forever. That's why when something isn't going well, no matter how good it is, the best thing they can do is walk away and move on.

Although they're a person who is connected with their emotions and have a high level of intuition, I feel that sometimes they can be a bit unrealistic; it's very difficult for them to differentiate reality from imagination.

One of the red flags that this person has is that they can do anything to get what they want, generating great resentment.

Physical appearance: thin body

Possible signs: Libra / Pisces

Things that may be relevant: letters "N" and "H"

⸻

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟓

The love of your life is a very intuitive and cheerful person. They always tries to see the positive side of things and likes to learn from their mistakes.

At first they're usually a calm person, but once they gain confidence with people, they bring out their more extroverted side.

The love of your life is a sentimental person and is not afraid to express their emotions openly.

In the workplace they may have an important position. This person radiates power and courage.

Regarding their economy, they may have a high purchasing power. I'm visualizing a life of luxury... maybe they live in a big house with many rooms, in a mansion or something like that. I'm also visualizing objects of great value.

For some of you, the love of your life may be someone famous, and for others, it may just be a well-known person in their field. They have a great public recognition.

When they're in a relationship, they like to be attentive with their partner and they want to make the person they love feel special. I'm visualizing them giving you gifts and taking you on a trip.

Some red flags of this person are that sometimes it's difficult for them to differentiate reality from imagination and there may be many misunderstandings when discussions arise.

Even though I said that they like to learn from their mistakes, sometimes they tend to walk away from their problems and don't like to face them.

Physical appearance: blonde hair / brown hair

Possible signs: Taurus / Cancer

Things that may be relevant: letters "D", "U", "S" and "L"

⸻

𝓟𝓲𝓵𝓮 𝟔

It's very likely that you meet the love of your life at work. Some of you may work in the same sector and others may work in the same place but in different areas.

This person is very generous and empathetic. They love helping others and enjoys sharing everything with the people they love the most. I also feel that they really like to do charity and they may be very supportive of a cause that's very important to them.

I feel that they're a super religious person and they want to have a traditional relationship. That is, open relationships and all that is not their thing. They also want to get married.

They're a passionate lover. When they see you for the first time, they will do anything to make you theirs.

Even though this person follows by what their heart dictates... don't let them fool you. They're very intelligent.

The love of your life is a fair person and treats everyone the same way. They're respectful and treat others the way they would like to be treated.

This person is someone important in the field where they work and everyone knows that they work hard.

The red flags of this person are that they can become very vindictive when people don't treat them the way they like. They're capable of dirtying people if they want to. I just heard "it's better to have them as a friend than as an enemy".

Another thing that can be a red flag is that they don't know how to listen to their inner voice. Sometimes they can be so capricious that they don't like to receive "no" for an answer.

Physical appearance: brown hair

Possible signs: Sagittarius / Taurus (water signs may be prominent in their chart)

Things that may be relevant: letters "F" and "H"

⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚♡⁎₊✧˚

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑘 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑠𝑜 𝑚𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔! 　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

[cuupidsss]

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, can I request a poly sbg x fem gyaru reader who gets bullied by Barron and his friends? (Angst but a very fluffy ending) :3

ARGH !! I’ve seen you requesting and I like this request <3 I’ll try my best, I’m gonna keep it simple but I hope you like it ❤️☺️

Tw: physical and verbal bullying, it’s nothing crazy though 🤓

You had always been expressive. Since you were young you had always liked to dress and act any way you liked. In middle school you dressed scene and now that your in high school you’ve decided to expire ment with Gyaru and let’s say your attached to the style.

You’d never think of giving it up but lately it hasn’t been easy keeping the cute look up. A couple of jocks have been bothering you. It’s just been some cruel words but your scared it’s gonna get to something more.

They’ve embarrassed you several times, you’ve mellowed down your outfits because of that. Mostly keeping the look. You don’t want them to think they’ve got the best of you. Your makeup and hairstyles haven’t changed at all but your outfits are less vibrant.

“Look at you.” You hear from behind you. You push your lips together. You don’t wanna look behind you, the classroom is pretty much empty and the class door is wide open. School is over, and your the last kid wandering. Atleast you thought.

You hear giggles behind you, you don’t turn to look, you don’t wanna see their ugly faces.

“Look at me, cmon you can do it.” He taunts you, you turn your attention to him, growing irritated. “I knew you could do it, cake face.” You sigh, your makeup is smooth as fuck and you know it but you can’t help but feel a little insecure.

You grab your things, you bag is cute and all but it’s not cheering you up. You throw your bag over your shoulder to leave before your pulled back harshly. You don’t fall, but you stammer.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” You scream angrily, clenching your teeth together. Barron looks at you, a little shocked but his face quickly changes to some twisted amusement his friends and him laugh at you. You feel so embarrassed and encased in this situation.

“What are you three doing?” You hear from the door. Tyler, you’ve never spoken to him before. You think you have one of your classes with him but you can’t remember, “your supposed to be outside practicing with us Barron.” Barron looks at Tyler and sighs, rolling his eyes. His attention goes back to you before smiling.

“Whatever.” You’d smile back if you didn’t knew he was taunting you. You look at Tyler. You rub your arm. Barron and his goons have left and it’s just you two.

“Thanks.” You say before rushing out quickly, that was humiliating.

—

The next day it’s nice outside. You can’t help but think of the utter embarrassment you’ve felt all day. Your on the bus, no seats are open and you look like a lost dog. You hear someone pat their seat, you look over to a cute red headed girl. She doesn’t seem particularly fond of sharing her seat but she does it anyway.

You sit down and take off your bag, you put it at your feet quietly, you take up as little space as possible.

“Hi, I’m Aiden what’s your name?” A boy behinds you says excitedly, you gasp silently. He scared you a bit! You look back at him.

“Hey, I’m (name).” You say timidly, you didn’t have a lot of friends since Barron kept messing with you, others don’t wanna be involved. Aiden smiles, just a little wider.

“I like your hair clip!” He says pointing at it, you smile, you see the girl next to you look over at you, you look at her. Her freckles are incredibly charming. She nods at you quietly before going back to whatever she was doing. A boy next to Aiden just waved before sitting back down.

You fix your bedazzled Jean shorts and cardagain before smiling at your shoes.

“Thanks man.” You say, you fiddle with it a bit. The bus comes to a stop and everyone starts loading off, you grab your bag and rush off.

—

Home room was fairly boring, you shared a home room with Barron so him throwing paper at your carefully sculpted pigtails was the only entertainment you had. Why did he bully like a Disney character?

The paper balls were really heavy though, when you picked one up off your lap you opened it and there was a flipping eraser in it. You squeezed the eraser.

“(Name), pay attention please sweetheart.” You teacher says, you look up. She’s going over todays schedule since the classes will be switched up a bit. You nod, she was really sweet so you couldn’t ever be mad at her.

Bam. Straight to the side of your face. A thick ass eraser too. A couple kids look back at you holding your cheek and frown. They can’t do anything.

Once class ended you slowly left, you waited for most people to leave before your teacher stops you. She asked if you were okay and you give her a half assed answer, she asked because you looked tired? How silly.

Once you were out in the hallway you contemplated in skipping, your next class was fairly boring. You sighed and decided to. You walked to the least popular bathroom, and threw your stuff in the stall.

Your only in there for couple minutes before a girl comes in to use it. Except she doesn’t, she knocks on the stall.

“Hey, is (name) in there?” She asks, her voice is kind. You clench your jaw.

“Yeah..” you stand up and open the stall. You look at her.

It was Taylor, you’ve spoke to her once or twice. She looks at you, a little concerned.

“Are you skipping? I’ve never seen you skip before!” She jokes before continuing. “I just wanted to ask if you were okay. I’ve seen Barron.. well I’ve heard he was being a jerk to you.” You clench your hands together.

“Ugh, yeah. I have this class with him so I just skipped.” You say, you fiddle with bracelet. She frowns.

“Let me know if he tries to pull anything else, okay?” She says, smiling, she wasn’t looking at you with pity but with sympathy. You nod your head.

“Yeah, I will, thanks!” You smile fondly at her. “Well, I’m just gonna go sit in this stall now for another thirty minutes.” She giggles before waving you goodbye and leaving.

—

It had been a couple weeks since the encounter and you were in the back of the school. Once again school had ended, this time you had stayed after for art club. You were gonna take the city bus home. It was raining but you had a umbrella. Suddenly your falling and you fall into a puddle, wrecking your cute outfit. You look up and see your umbrella several feet away from you, before it’s picked up by someone. Barron. You close your eyes and feel like your about to cry, this is way to stressful. You look at your tights and skirt and frown before you start just sobbing. A full on mental breakdown.

At first their laughing before you start screaming Bloody Mary. Then their gasping.

“Shut the hell up! Someone’s gonna-“ before one of Barrons goons can finish, he’s hitting to hard grassy floor. Another one runs off before Barron starts running too. You look up and see several people. This is so dumb is all you can think. Looking at your shoes. Your so mad so so mad.

“Hey, are you.. are you okay?” Taylor say, she’s so sweet. She helps you up and picks some mud out your hair. You look at her before drying your face and clearing your voice.

“Uh yeah, I’m fine.” You say, pulling a little lays bit of mud out of your now messy hair. You feel someone tap your shoulder. Aiden.

“We should probably go inside.” Ashlyn says, the freckles girl with the long braids. You remember her. You all walk inside quietly. You look at your watch.

“They took your umbrella.” Tyler says annoyed, “I didn’t know they liked sailor moon.” He says referring to your themed umbrella, you laugh a bit at his remark.

Ashlyn told you you should probably go wash the mud off your face. You nod before going to the school bathroom. You pull out your gym clothes, just some simple black shorts with a corny shirt. They got cleaned yesterday and you haven’t used them so you just put them on. You wash the mud off your face, sadly that means you have to take your makeup off. Your okay with it, as long as your not being bullied in the rain.

You take out your hair, that proved difficult cause of the hairspray but you did it. You quickly threw it in a low ponytail before leaving the bathroom. Taylor waves you over, the Logan kid next to to her.

Aiden and Ben wave aswell. You walk over.

“Hey, just wanna say thanks.” You pull your bangs behind your ears. They all nod.

“Those guys are pains, aren’t they?” Aiden says, he still has that funky grin on, it suits him well.

“Yeah! They ruined my favorite tank top.” You mutter our. Ashlyn looks at you.

Tyler speaks up. “Let us know if they keep picking on you.” You get a sense of deja bud before you feel someone hug you.

Taylor. “I’m so glad your okay, I was worried they were gonna do something like that!” She rambles with a pouty face, “I’ve never seen you without your gyaru makeup, your cute with it and without it.”

You smile brightly. “You know what gyaru is!?” You say, your pretty shocked.

“Yeah, I started researching it after our talk two weeks ago!” You smile, no one’s ever taken interest in your style with you.

Suddenly everyone’s asking you questions, and you feel flustered. You’ve never felt such joy, you feel appreciated. Cared for even, you blush at all the attention.

“Oh! Yeah, gyaru can just be a style and it comes from many Asian country’s, there’s different kinds too!!” You answer another question. Ashlyn asked this one, she seemed more interested in the background information of it.

It felt like hours where you guys just talked but it was just a couple minutes. Eventually you all had to go home but it was such a humanizing experience.

You look through your phone, looking at the photos you took with the group while you guys walked around the school. You smile and fiddle with your hair.

For the first time in a long time you were excited to go to school the next day.

Jeez!! I hope you liked this! It’s my first time receiving a request ❤️‼️ thank you for requesting I’m really great full! I hope you like it and have a good day. :3

[ask-funnybunnydoll]

Hi!

I think I have to move on.

You may have noticed that all of a sudden my posts have become less and less frequent. That's not on purpose I simply don't have the motivation to keep this ask blog going. I made this blog at the peak of my TADC hyperfixation because I knew it would give me the boost to work. At the start I made like, what? 2 a day, wowzas! Then it became like every other day posts. It's not that I don't enjoy the blog, the ship, the asks. Hell, the asks were the best part of this, I love just seeing what you guys come up with for these three and I get to do the even more fun part of drawing the answer.

But I still have no motivation to keep this going. And I have fixated on something else if you follow my main.

So, thank you for being here and still liking my posts even if I hadn't posted often. This was the most fun I've had and being my first ask blog I ever created just makes it more important to me.

I probably won't ever revive this blog but I'll keep it open for you. And if you want to see what the story I originally planned out was gonna be then check below the cut! Or if you wanna stay curious and theorize then just scroll by. Thank you again, hope ya have a great day and year. I hope my shit was at least okay to you.

I'm not gonna lie. Most of the stuff was just created along the way of drawing. I was like, huh this would be cool let's add that in. And ofc I didn't get to any juicy lore in this but it would've been rushed because I didn't plan beforehand... which you probably could tell xd

For Pomni, here's the plot twist: she's dead and her conscience was updated into the game to keep her somewhat alive. She worked in the place that created the game, she even took part in putting people in there. The entire game was just an expirement to test if immortality was possible, but of course.. everyone goes insane in there so they have to keep on and keep on trying with more and more people to get anywhere. They wait until someone goes to edge of absolute insanity and that's when they take them out of the game, their bodies are still kept alive and they go back to normal. They forget everything that happened while in the game. For Pomni she died just after her conscience was converted to the game, for others they were forced to go while alive. Who killed Pomni? Well, her boss, the head of the experimentation. Why? Idk 😭

For Jax, I gave him a dark story. He was isolated in his home and kept away from the outside world, which is why he lacks empathy, because he simply doesn't know how to feel that way when he never really had knowledge of emotions outside or even inside his home. His father was emotionally and physically ab4sive so.. that didn't help. He latched onto his mother the most but they never saw eachother often. That's all I had for him in mind.

For Ragatha, she lived in the country on her own land with her husband. Yup! She had a husband and a daughter too. Husband was a total jerk and she couldn't leave because she didn't want their kid to experience separated parents. She's a doll in the game because it resembles the doll she made for her daughter.

I also had some plot that I made up in my mind. Like.... Pomni at the end would be the last one alone in the digital circus. That being since she's dead she would just be yknow. Dead if she left the game. Jax and Ragatha leave but only because Pomni forces them. Again don't know how, I probably would have made it up while I went along with the story. So, Pomni is just there alone, with Caine. And she lives like that for eternity. She doesn't go insane anymore and it isn't as lonely as it used to feel like. It would feel like home kind of. But she would be there, longing for her partners forever unless she decides one day to just. Yknow, die..

Also since Jax and Ragatha would forget everything after they leave the game, they just don't remember they were in a relationship and would live their lives like before. Sad and lonely.

Goodness, I forget I make the most sad stories ever sometimes 😭

[enjoythesilentworld]

Simon's Month - Physical Touch

day 27 but a lil late @youngroyals-events

“Can I touch you? Just to be sure you’re real.” or, Catfish!Wilmon return

read on ao3 (T, 2k)

sneak peak:

Simon: are you free tonight? Wille: Please don’t be mad. S: oh god what are you married or something W: No, no! Nothing like that.  It’s just… I’m not in the country right now.  S: ?? what Wille what the fuck W: I know! I’m sorry.  S: why is your location set to Stockholm when you’re not even in Sweden  W: Well, technically, I do live in Stockholm.  I’m just on a work trip. S: Wille W: I said I was sorry!  Surely my chances with you don’t have a five day expiration date.   S: you won’t be back for five days?  W: …Yes S: what if i meet a different possible love of my life in the next five days? am i meant to just wait around for you and tell him no? W: I’m a possible love of your life? S: that’s not what i said W: It’s what you implied, though.  :)  S: you better convince me to stick around for five days if you wanna keep that title Wille

continue on ao3... (sorry formatting this on tumblr is actual hell)

[jotun-philosopher]

How Aziraphale did the trick

...or at least, how I *think* Aziraphale did the photo/leaflet switch, based on hazy recollections of the scene in question, reading Expert at the Card Table, quite a bit of thought and some practical experimentation.

With no DVD of s2 available at time of writing, and my Prime Video free trial having long expired (can't quite justify the cost of a subscription if I'd only be using it for one show), I'm basing this hypothesis on my recollections of the dressing room scene, bolstered by gifs I've seen around tumblr (which I have highly variable luck finding in the gif search thingy...) -- the possibility that I've misremembered something that renders my whole hypothesis null is therefore high, so I absolutely welcome and encourage commentary from folks who know a heck of a lot more about sleight-of-hand (and remember the dressing room scene better!) than I do.

With that out of the way... On with the motley!

We start with Crowley sprawling on the sofa while Azzy is bopping happily around to the left (as one faces the door) but on a diagonal such that Crowley can't see him from the side, a 'Ladies Of Camelot' leaflet tucked into his left sleeve or an inner pocket of his jacket as a souvenir of the evening. Enter Furfur and the Nazi Zombie Flesh-Eaters, bearing The Photograph!

Ineffable 'oh crap!' reaction!

Crowley holds on to the photo for a while (possibly imagining having it on display in a nice frame in the living room of a seaside cottage???), then hands photograph and envelope to Aziraphale, who cottons on to the danger immediately.

While Crowley (in his role as Glamorous Assistant, albeit in a snazzy suit rather than a spangly leotard) provides a distraction for Furfur and the Nazis (this bit's important -- I'm not 100% sure the trick would've worked otherwise) and vice versa, Aziraphale retrieves the Ladies Of Camelot leaflet from whichever part of his clothing he's stashed it in and slips it into the envelope, keeping it folded over so as to be less visible and using the envelope itself, as well as the photograph, as extra physical barriers.

Furfur finishes bickering with Crowley and demands the photograph back. Aziraphale --

Banana fish gorilla shoelace with a dash of nutmeg

-- appears to slip the photograph back into the envelope, but actually slips it *between* himself and the envelope, holding it gently in place with his left thumb and buying a few extra seconds to adjust its position by pulling the envelope closer to himself. He makes a showy, elaborate gesture with his right hand (I am convinced that that was a misdirection intended at least as much for us as for his in-universe audience), neatly palming the photograph in his left hand as he takes the envelope in his right and hands it to Furfur, who smugly backstabs the Nazis and buggers off back to Hell. (Furfur doesn't strike me as having the intelligence or imagination to look for signs that Az might've pulled something; if he did, he'd've checked the envelope in the dressing room, and certainly before handing it to Dagon)

***

This is how I personally think Aziraphale did the trick -- a careful rewatch (yo ho ho!) of the scene in question at the very least does not contradict it, though it did highlight that I'd got Furfur's arguing with Crowley about the War In Heaven mixed up with the far briefer moment of distraction that lets Az make the switch, giving him less time than I'd thought. The basic physical procedure that I proposed above is plausible, if nothing else; I have made practical experiments in replicating it (props pictured below) and they've panned out well enough (though not at anything like the speed Az would've used).

Props: A5 envelope, RNLI thingy that seemed to be about the right size, hastily scribbled replica of The Photograph

The envelope and leaflet are somewhat larger than their in-show analogues, but they were the best I could find quickly.

Bonus: a closer look at the replica photo, feat. my left hand:

Cool, eh? XD

This highlights, to me, the plausibility of my idea that Aziraphale palmed the photograph -- the photo would'v'e been approximately 3.5in/side, while the replica is drawn on a piece of paper that's 3 7/8 in/side, and my hands are very likely smaller than Michael Sheen's, making a successful palm very feasible. Furthermore, given the fast-moving situation and his being under observation, I doubt he'd've had time to do anything else, and on rewatching there's no indication in his hand movements that he did anything other than palming.

***

And in case I have in fact messed something up and need correcting:

(OK, mostly including this gif 'cos I love the 'You were right' dance XD)

[madfantasy]

New 3 things that happened:

*I got my new ID, my id expired and to renew it I had to get photographed, and since I just opened my bank account a year ago it depends on it so already I was giving up on the idea to keep the account but by miracle a photographer agreed to picture us at home, and it turned to us cuz I wanted all my sibs to have theirs taken with me too and because I had to argue first time to get my ID forever, so i didn't have the energy to keep doing it for the rest of my sibs so now it was the chance. The day of the photographer coming I was shaking with fear and I thought I would never leave the bathroom gotten ill. I fear seeing people more than dyin so I don't know how I held it together, I literally don't remember how it went or how I did, but I recall my sibs looking the same as I felt but it was finally done. parents too taken their shoots and because one needed their passport renewed to renew their id, them alone costing 1k$ and the appointment was set 6 months ahead, we R now close to it anyway, and the thought of how we have to pay to exist some more costly made me think of my worthlessness and helplessness even more, making me ashamed of still living.

The thing that blinded me, me the first to be tested on lo

*my eye is better, I still see a dark spot looking in a certain direction, getting an eye mask surprisingly helped keeping my eyes less dry cuz they be the most when I wake up and I had the driest time before it got infected and swelled, and already I'm used to the spot and can ignore it..

*I'm still drawing, literally it's making me live love and laugh, I don't care about improving or drawing my best constantly, ai can get poisoned for all I care as it continues to dehumanise the whole point of art-- keeping humanity alive ( btw use glazing ❤️🖤)

I realised that I don't have any physical collection of my art & since I can't look at the screens forever just to browse, nd printing all my stuff isn't feasible, then I came across those mini albums Nd I got the idea to just print one sheet = 9 pics! They look good too for trashy quality, I love it 8' and yes, purple and silver is the 10% obsession to my 90% red and black pallets, thanks to remembering Freeza c'x

But as usual posting my drawings never cease to eat me alive with anxiety, but I think I'm slowly becoming indifferent to it, even if the thought of that no one actually sees my art but me, which is the main case cuz I am living in isolation and being drawing in secret till few recent years because of my conservative surroundings, I feel much calmer when I'm not seen and maybe it's self destructive in a way cuz to stay posting I need to be commissioned cuz net bill, but it became irrelevant cuz I accepted that i can't have the mental capacity to be a social media person or chase anything that I already knew I can't maintain, I had an art block for a year I almost believed that was it for my art drive and me cuz it my sanity— cuz burning out so bad. If my post has a description it was in my drafts for months cuz I plan for every piece I share, but if can't form words I allow myself to let it be captionless, I draw faster than I form words and that's why art is important to me on a personal level, it's my first way of express even if its indirect, the only bit of human Mani left to live in me to put through lines and paint splodges. Even if no one sees it, and to be honest with myself, have very weak chances of being seen on a level that benefits me financially, I'm on the other side of the world, never seen the sky beyond my schooling days, nonverbal irl and know that I can get taken advantage of easily in social manner because it either I don't get the social cues or can't say no..

I'm grateful that at least I got the chance to experience being in a loving nurturing fandom like Sev's that made me experience genuine human goodness and care I never thought possible, made me have some self worth, personality beyond a made for marriage caretaker, and allowed me to get art tools and clothing that I was never allowed or could afford, and many first time small life pleasures like perfumes, food and toys, even if I only recognise 5 or 10 of you dears now, by DP liking my posts- (I suck at remembering names sorry)

I'm also grateful to have a room after endless years of couch and house movings, I have a safe space to still be able to draw and be cool under an AC in this 50° weather..

I think realistically that's the best it can get having spent all my life trying to get anywhere but isolated, and nothing working. At least I'm indifferent and fine of being the caretaker of my disabled guardians and siblings, I need them as much as they need me, even if it caused me the same cycle of mental anguish and earth leavings hehe

Wish U all the ease and peace and yummy peas 🫶🏽

4 am, sleep deprived