#it's okay I think (the art) not my favourite but not bad either :D

[beth-gythraul]

Egg A1! <3 Dw they got adopted by tumblr

[guesst]

OKAY MANHWA REC LIST

CONCUBINE WALKTHROUGH

the main reason i made this list lol concubine walkthrough is a video game isekai with a. a really REALLY cool artstyle b. very well thought out plot that kept me guessing and c. lovely characters. the game itself is set in historical korea so if youre a fan of that id rec. super super good

the art btw ⬇️

THE VILLAINESS EMPRESS' ATTENDANT

this one i started reading recently! the art is cute, plot is also fun w a healthy dose of comedy and i really like the empress akfjsm her and the mc have such a good relationship its great

could be yuri but its not and honestly i love it either way

FOAM OF THE SEA

okay well this one i dont have much to say about cus only 2 chapters are out so far lol BUT its intriguing!! the premise so far is that the main character, having been pushed off a cliff by her lover, is resurrected in a different body by a sea witch n is now out for revenge. has very strong little mermaid elements and againnn the art is lovely. look at the cover!! the art !!

S-Class Hunter Doesn't Want to Be a Villainous Princess

IF YOUVE READ BEWARE OF THE VILLAINESS AND YOU LIKED IT AND HAVENT READ THIS YOU SHOULD. same artist!! same energy!!! tower dungeon protagonist is thrown into a romance plot and now has to clear this to get back home . i love her so much shes so op lmao. anyway its a good action/comedy so far and the constellations are funny too

I SEE YOU

i am rereading this yet again. its so good its so so good you will cry and your heart will feel warm and happy i promise. it handles grief and friendship and the side characters so well the backstories are so !! pain inducing !! and good !! and honestly its so easy to like the characters !! if you pick one thing to read from the list please make it this. also theres this silly man

MY FAVOURITE IDOL

super super super good take on the idol genre !!! i will admit i dont read much manhwa about idols (like. at all) but i am really enjoying how they explore the industry in this one. plus theres some bodyswapping :D and the character arcs are great too !! both mains learn a lot from each others lives :]

they are good kids

THE REDEMPTION OF EARL NOTTINGHAM

INSANELY GOOD !! the author clearly did a lot of research into the era this is set in -- early 1900s, during WW1 (which on its own is pretty unique like im not seeing a lot of historical manhwas set this time) and definitely has some very heavy themes. the mc time travels back to her twenties just before ww1 breaks out, after her marriage goes wrong w her husband and she dies from. falling down the stairs. RIP. i just think its really well written and the pacing is lovely - the author is not infodumping all the bad things that happened in one go and its working really well. also look at this guy

okay ive hit image limit cus im using app, truly terrible. TBC

[fraternum-momentum]

This is so so stupid but I got very happy when I read in your strawpage you are from 2003 too, I've lurking around seeing your art ever since DOL caught my eye and you're one of my favourite artists so having that bit in common is cool! I also love your DOL designs, especially Kylar's and Whitney's but the fave gotta be your PC she's so pretty! Seeing your fanarts keeps tempting me into posting dol art of my own so if I ever draw dol I'll draw our wet cat (Kylar) together >:)

Also if you haven't played Fields of Mistria or Homicipher I definitely recommend them! The first one is similar to Stardew Valley in the sense you're a farmer, you can decorate your house and romance any of the bachelors/bachelorettes but this one is more fantasy-like and the artstyle reminds me of 80s anime and Sailor Moon. The second came out recently and I haven't played it yet but I saw the trailer and some fanarts; you wake up in a terrifying unknown world where you have to survive and the romance options are very creepy men, one of the appeals of this one is trying to learn the world's language, it looks fun

Wish you a nice weekend! PS: Is it ok to follow you if I like South Park? I know DOL is darker when it comes to sexual stuff but just in case I prefer to ask boundaries

HELL YEAA '03 BABIESS 🤝🤝 ngl that dol era was probably peak bc i was fucking around with a lot of my mooties and just interacting with the fandom in general, it was so funnnn :3 and ky and whit r probably the most popular ones out of the 4 school li's (designwise my favs r still my fallen syds bc pretty) so understandable (⌒_⌒)d

but thats insane that u find my pc pretty bc thats probably the most boring, most generic looking self insert ever 😭😭😭😭 so many people have cooler looking pcs out there so im flattered that u like mine 😭😭😭 ??????? for some reason 😭 ??????????

and you totally should !!!! (if u want to of course) despite me not posting as much dol as i used to i still love seeing dol fanart !! but do whatevr ur heart desiresss and no pressure :3

and i've actually been following the development of fields of mistria ever since i saw march in my twt feed !! i just want to wait for the full release so i dont have to keep repeating playthroughs n stuff (its the same with hades 2, i just tried out the beta test bc its free so i went why not lmao)

OKAY. I KNOW i said im gonna play homicipher but like,,,,,,,,, this is def just a me thing but when everyone keeps saying to play this thing or watch this thing (arcane,,,, homicipher,,,) it just disincentivises me to do it 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 especially when i know im gonna like the thing. IDK WHY,,,, maybe its kinda like the same philosophy as someone telling u to do the dishes when ur alr on ur way to do the dishes and like ok i dont want to do it anymore ?? idkkk its weirdd

Re: P.S. you can follow me from whatever fandom ur in ! as long as youre not a minor and u have either 'adult' or your age in bio then its all good

SORRY I WAS KINDA CONFUSED AS TO WHO U WERE TALKING ABT I THOUGHT IT WAS THE HORSE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i think u meant celia from tpof :3 ? that's probably one of my favorite drawings ive done ! i dont remember how i did it anymore thou,,,,,,,,

AND YEAA!!! i used to be an infamous irumatsu shipper back when i was active on my main on insta ! my silly lesbiabs,,,,,,,,,, they r everything to me,,,, my favorite chara is shuichi tho ♡

CATCHING UP WITH LORE 😭😭 U DONT HAVE TO DO ALL THAT,,, u arent missing out on much dw 😭 ty tho,,

weirdly enough i never got into creepypastas. i def stumbled into them from time to time like slenderman, jeff the killer, ben drowned n shit but i think ever since i got scared shitless by the smiledog.jpeg (??) i never stepped my foot into creepypasta territory ever again 😭😭😭😭😭 ok i like horror but im really really bad with jumpscares and suspence and stuff. i get scared easily orz,,

ive heard of it ! seen a lot of (really insane) fanart for it !! havent played it tho but i like some of the designs :3 i keep seeing the guy with the horns? malleus ? hes cute,, well tbh all of them r cute so its a hard choice

[nian-7]

Hellooo! I hope you are having a good day :D I would like to request a romantic matchup for Hypmic, Paralive and Pjsk (if that's too much then hypmic and Pjsk please!)

My zodiac is Taurus and my MBTI is INFP, my love language is quality time! (Receiving) usually I'm not shy but it's more like I don't know how to talk to people? I feel like it's mostly awkward since I don't go out of my comfort zone quite often. I also overthink quite a lot, so if I were to talk to someone, I usually practice what I'm going to say in my head to make it sound natural and not too formal because I really don't want to sound weird and nervous talking to them.

I really really like drawing and painting! Both traditionally and digitally. For drawing i mostly draw people but weirdly when I paint, I mostly draw landscapes and scenes, I think that might be because I enjoy painting backgrounds more rather than drawing them. I also like fantasy stories/movies a lot more than other genres and my second favourite is thriller! Not too big on horror though I get scared easily...speaking of getting scared, I have a fear of darkness and frogs (no clue if that's important) I love playing indie games! Plus points if they have pixel art. I don't know what about them makes me like it so much, maybe it's the colours or atmosphere? But games that are like that and I liked are: omori (Favourite!), Yume Nikki, mad father, Ib, Angels of death (2nd favourite!) but I also like puzzle games or turn based games! I like games where you have to think it through or strategize your way through it, it makes it more fun.

For music, I mostly listen to Vocaloid producers or utaite's like Eve (favourite!), soraru, Teniwoha, Surii, PinocchioP, etc. But other than Vocaloid, I mostly listen to hypmic or enstars or paralive songs...

I'm more of a follower rather than a leader although if something goes out of hand or no one takes care of it then I will take the initiative.

I don't do well with new surroundings either, for example moving schools. I will have a harder time making new groups of friends and I also have a hard time getting used to everything 😞. But when I do find a friend group, I will stick with them for a long time (unless they turned into bad people)

I would consider myself as a loyal person, I would not leave someone dear to me ever unless there's a good reason for it. I also value honesty a lot, in my opinion a comfortable friendship or relationship can start with people being comfortable and saying what they want to say. Of course that way of thinking doesn't apply to everyone but that's how I view it.

I know I said I value honesty, but sometimes I can be a little too honest. At some point I can get too blunt with my opinions and accidentally hurt someone. I also struggle with opening up to people. It's not like I don't want them to know, it's more like I'm scared of what they'll think of me after. I don't want their view of me change just because I voiced my struggles 😞.

Oh I also want to slip this in, I absolutely ADORE lolita fashion! Anything with ribbons and laces and big dresses I'd love it, I also like vintage aesthetics, royal and steampunk.

That's it from me, I hope that's enough? Or if that's too much then I'm very sorry for rambling so much 😭

hi!! i absolutely love your interests.. like.. angels of death?! i love that game sm... anyways!! hope you enjoy your matchup, anon!

I match you with...

Ichiro Yamada!

-Okay, Ichiro would push you out of your comfort zone no matter how awkward you are but he does know his limits of when you're uncomfortable. He wants you to step outside of your comfort zone occasionally but respects your limits.

-Although I don't think his love language is quality time and it's more of a mix of words of affirmation and acts of service, he'd still cherish any quality time. Just a very respectful boyfriend of your limits that you set.

-I think I ended up picking people who'd support you a lot through your hobbies... (unintentionally). Either way, he'd support you through thick and thin no matter what.

-Movie dates with Ichiro....

-Loyalty and honesty are going to be a big theme between these three guys. Ichiro values both deeply and wants a loyal and honest partner above all else. He tries his best to be honest with you because he's already so loyal that well... you don't have to worry about it at all.

I match you with...

Satsuki Ito!

-Probably beats Ichiro in terms of loyalty and honesty. Just by a bit... Satsuki can't even lie to you no matter what it is. He's just so obvious that you don't have to worry about him lying to you whatsoever.

-He's far too embarrassed to do a lot of physical affection or words of affirmation so quality time is a big one he enjoys a lot. Just being around you makes him so giddy that he can't help but love being in the moment.

-He's such a big softie and he loves you so much that he feels offended that you think he'd treat you differently because of your struggles. Everyone has them, even him!

-Poor guy.. he really hopes you get along with his brothers and wants you to be comfortable with them like you are with him! He knows you have a hard time with new people and communicating so he just hopes that it goes well.

I match you with...

Toya Aoyagi!

-I know the other two on this list are very extroverted or at least extroverted compared to Toya of all people but! I picked Toya because I feel like he's trying to be a little more extroverted but wouldn't push you out of your comfort zone in social situations.

-He's a very supportive boyfriend like the other two and always enjoys it when you show your art to him and cherishes any pieces you might gift to him if anything.

-His love language is also quality time so that's a big reason I matched you up with him as well. He loves quality time above all else and he's a very low maintenance boyfriend overall. No need for fancy dates. As long as he can spend time with you, he's happy.

-Unlike the other two, Toya is also more of a follower but can be a leader in a way if needed for you. He doesn't mind taking the lead as long as he's confident in it or if you reassure him.

-As a very loyal person himself, I think he'd love it if you got along with his friends as well and always puts you on a pedestal in his heart. He'd never dare to betray you and is a little hesitant when he has to lie about something like a surprise birthday gift.

-He's a very honest person too and would never dare to think differently of you just because you have your own struggles. Everyone does so why should he treat you differently because of them?

[chickensarentcheap]

Lost and Found- Chapter 22

Fandom: Extraction

Pairing: Tyler Rake and Esme Drummond (OFC. But you do not have to read the others in the series to understand this fic.)

Warnings: some profanity, angst

ALSO, IT'S A LONG ONE, FOLKS lol. Sorry.

*Includes Extraction 1 and 2 canon mentions

Tagging: @tragiclyhip @munstysmind @themaradwrites @youflickedtooharddamnit @secretaryunpaid @kmc1989 @thebejeweledwatercat @asirensrage @theesirenteller @residentdormouse @arrthurpendragon @ocappreciation @occommunity @karimac @alisbackalleybbq @ninjasawakenedmystar

Link to Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43179357/chapters/130239049

My tag list is OPEN. Please just let me know if you'd like to be added :D

****

He lounges in the room Millie shares with Abuela. Stretched out on his side and propped up on his elbow; watching as his daughter quietly and contently plays just mere inches away. The four-year-old clad in her choice of attire for the day; consisting of a red and black button-down shirt paired with extremely bright and bold leggings with cat faces splashed over every inch. Her hair loose and unruly; falling into her eyes and over her face as she kneels in front of a large plastic tote box. Holding a treasure trove of belongings that Yaz had managed -after he and a small team had successfully broken in- to gather from Alessio’s home. Her entire collection of GI Joe dolls and My Little Ponies, more art and craft supplies, and a handful of Barbies and accessories.

“Tyler?”

He helps himself to one of the wine gums from the open carton that sits between them. Even in the midst of all of his prepping and immersing himself further in the role of mercenary, he had taken the time out when she’d requested his attention. Unable to resist that tiny voice, that hopeful smile, and those brilliant blue eyes. “Yeah?”

“Do you think that Barbie…” Millie holds up her favourite doll; baring beautiful dark skin and shimmering black hair and wearing a sparkling gold mini dress. And a matching pair of impossibly high heels. ”...THIS Barbie…would like GI Joe?”

“Which GI Joe are we talking about?”

“This guy!” She picks up the action figure in question; tall and muscular with blond hair and green eyes, clad in his fatigues. “He’s my all-time fave! The rest are just…I dunno…too basic for my best Barbie.”

“Basic?”

“Momma says that, in a nutshell, someone who is basic is VERY boring. Unoriginal. They don’t offer anything new. They can put you to sleep with how ordinary and vanilla they are.”

“She says that a lot about people?”

“Just the guys who try and date her. And you know what? She’s right. They’re basic as hell.”

Smirking, he pops the wine gum into his mouth.

Millie lowers her voice. “Momma actually calls them a bad word. Can I tell you what it is? Without getting in trouble? Or without telling her I said it?”

“I won’t give you any grief for it. And remember what I told you? About how snitches get stitches? Your secret’s safe with me.”

“She calls them ‘basic bitches.’” She dissolves into giggles, both hands covering her mouth, her eyes narrowed and sparkling. “Isn’t that hilarious? Basic bitches. It’s mean, but it’s funny too!”

“Does your mom date a lot? Has there been a lot of guys? Before Alessio? That come around?”

“No. Not really. Not a lot. Just a few. And momma didn’t date. They TRIED and date her.”

“Gotcha. So they ask her out and…?”

“And she always said ‘no’. That she wasn’t interested. She was nice when she told them that. She said just too busy with work and taking care of me. But once they were gone? She told me the real deal.”

“She told you? Or did you hear her telling someone else?”

“You’re good. You’re REALLY good. Don’t tell her that either, okay? That I spy sometimes? I hear things. Mostly when she’s talking to Auntie Nik on the phone or Facetime. Sometimes it’s Uncle Yaz. Mom thinks I’m asleep, but I’m really sitting at the end of the hall. She can’t see me if she’s in her room, and I’m hiding there.”

“This is when you lived in your old apartment?”

Millie nods. ”I LOVED that apartment. It was nice. Better than living at Alessio’s dumb-ass house. I wasn’t allowed to do anything there. I wasn’t allowed to make crafts because they were too messy, I wasn’t allowed to listen to music and dance, and I definitely wasn’t allowed to have a pet. I had a cat. Before we moved in with him.”

“Where’s the cat now?”

“Uncle Duey took her. Her name is Beatrice, but everyone calls her Bea. Like how my name is really Amelia, but everyone calls me ‘Millie.’ She’s super cute; she’s black, but she has white under her chin and near her nose, and she has white socks. We got her from the shelter.”

“You miss her?”

“I miss Bea all the time. She used to sleep with me. Every night. Right by my head. And she was a lot of fun! She would play fetch; I’d throw her favourite toy, and she’d run and grab it and bring it back to me! And she LOVED to sit in the window and yell at the pigeons that came on the balcony. I bet she would have grabbed ‘em and beat ‘em up if mom let her outside.”

“That wouldn’t have been good. What if they beat HER up?”

“Do you know who the Bowery King is?”

“I know a bit about him.”

“Momma and Uncle John know him. I only met him once. Momma took me to where he lives. He has tons of pigeons! And mom said if Bea ever got out and caught one of his birds? We would have been in big shit!’

Tyler gives a small chuckle. “I can imagine.”

“Uncle John said we would have been fine. He would have protected us. He would have told the Bowery King to take a hike! He didn’t say it like THAT, though. He said the ‘f word’. Do you know what word I mean?”

“I do. Very well. So about these guys your mom would date…”

She stares at him pointedly. And in those narrowed eyes and furrowed brow, he immediately sees himself.

“That tried to date HER,” he quickly corrects himself. “She didn’t like any of them?”

“I mean, I guess she liked them enough. To at least give them a chance.”

“What happened? Things didn’t work out?”

“She got bored with them. They weren’t interesting enough for her. And they all had boring jobs; lawyers and doctors and guys that work on Wall Street. Yawn city! And they weren’t even good-looking to make up for it! But there was one guy, though. That was pretty cool. I liked him.”

“What was he like?”

“He was super nice. He would always bring us takeout; pizza and Chinese and fried chicken and even tacos!”

“Everything is about food with you, isn’t it.”

“It’s my love language. It makes my tummy AND my heart happy. I don’t care if I get fat when I’m older. I’m gonna eat as much as I want. Whatever I want, too!”

“So this guy…”

“He used to take us to Rangers hockey games and to see the Mets play baseball. And sometimes, he’d take me places all by himself. We’d go to the movies and bowling and to the arcade!”

“Your mum was okay with that? Just sending you off with him!”

“She trusted him. He was a policeman!”

Tyler frowns. “He was a cop.”

“Not like a regular one. He wore normal clothes. Sometimes a suit and tie. And he would go to accidents and murders and stuff and ask people lots of questions.”

“He was a detective?”

“Yeah! That’s what he was! He was an alright guy, though. He was nice to me. And I think he REALLY liked mom.”

“Did he ever stay over?”

“Hell no! That’s a big no-no! Momma NEVER let that happen. She would always say that ‘Millie isn’t ready for that kind of thing’. And she was right. I didn’t want to see some guy walking around in his gitch first thing in the morning!”

“What happened? With your mum and this guy? She wasn’t into him?”

“She seemed like she was. They spent a lot of time together. It’s kinda weird, right? That he was a cop? ‘Cause momma’s job is totally illegal, and Auntie Nik is a criminal! Did you know that? That she was in jail?”

“I did know that, yeah.”

“Totally badass, right? But the guy? He found out the truth about what mom does for a living. And everything about Auntie Nik and Uncle Yaz. After that, he couldn’t date momma anymore. If he did, he’d have to arrest her.”

“That wouldn’t have been good.”

“No. But instead of doing that, he just decided not to see her anymore. He said he would pretend he NEVER found out the truth. That’s good of him, I think. ‘Cause then momma would have gotten in trouble, and I never would have seen her again. That would have made me really sad. Not to have my momma. And you never answered my question.”

“I forgot what it was.”

“Would my favourite Barbie like my favourite GI Joe?”

“What do you think?”

“Well, he seems nice enough. He’s definitely not boring. Like Ken. Ken is definitely what mom would call a basic bitch.”

“Yeah, he’s always been a drongo.”

“What does that mean? drongo?”

“Stupid. An idiot.”

“A dumb ass?”

“Basically. That’s what we call them. In Australia. Drongos.”

“Does everyone in Australia talk like you do?”

“Maybe not exactly like it. But we all have accents. They sound a bit different; depending on what area you come from.”

“And are there tons of cool words there? That you say different than us?”

“Way too many to count. Once you get settled, I’ll teach you all kinds of cool slang.”

“Will you teach me the swears too?”

“I don’t know about THAT.”

“Please? Pretty please? I want to learn the swears! I promise I won’t repeat them. Not in front of other adults or kids. And especially not in front of momma. It can just be for us!”

“We’ll see.”

“And am I really going to get to see kangaroos and koalas?”

“I get them all the time around the house. The koalas love the trees in the backyard. They’re always hanging out in them. You’ll have to be careful, though; they’re cute, but they can be nasty. Don’t go around chasing them and trying to pick them up, alright?”

Millie nods. “Momma said there’s lots of snakes there, too. Will we get to see those?”

“Sometimes they even get in the house. Then I have to grab them and take them back outside. Are you scared of snakes?”

“Nope. Momma is, but I’m not. I think they’re cool.”

“You can help, then. We get any in the house, you can be the junior snake wrangler.”

“Is it true that the spiders are the size of dinner plates? That’s what mom said.”

“They can be≥ d. They won’t hurt you, though. They’re huge and ugly, but they’re not dangerous.”

“I wanna see one. Really bad!”

“Tell you what, first one I have to relocate ‘cause your mom is threatening to burn down the house? I’ll let you hold it. Get you used to handling them. So you’re not freaking out when you see them wandering around the place.”

“So I’m not a ‘fraidy cat like mommy! When we lived in our old apartment, we’d get spiders! Just little ones, though. And daddy long legs. She was even scared of them! I’m the one who had to get them for her. And she would always want me to kill them! ‘Millie, get him! Squish him!’ Mean mom! But you know what I did instead? I saved a spaghetti sauce jar and cleaned it all out and that’s what I’d put them in. And then I’d take them outside and let them go!”

They lapse into a comfortable silence, and Tyler watches her as his little girl neatly arranges her toys and craft supplies in the bin; not having the heart to point out that all the transporting during their relocation to Australia would no doubt leave the bin in a disorganized mess. She hums while she works; a trait she’d inherited from her mother, and he’d both discovered and fallen in love with- during their year together.

Yet despite the similarities to Esme, he sees more of himself inside Millie than anything else. The identical profile -before his nose had been broken and left him with the bump in the bridge-, the same furrows in the brow, the brilliant blue eyes, the curve of the jaw line, the slim, slender neck, and long, almost gangly limbs. And it’s almost unsettling; sitting across from his ‘mini me’ with all their likeness and her resemblance in physical appearance, personality and likes and dislikes she shares with his son. Their love for drawing and crafts. Their care and compassion for animals. Their endless curiosity and love for life and everyone in it.

Sitting back on her heels, she shoves her hair out of her face “Tyler?”

“Millie?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You’ve been on a roll so far. I don’t see a reason for you to stop now.”

“It’s kinda personal. And touchy.”

“Personal and touchy for who?”

“Me. I might get emotional.”

“That’s okay. You’re human. Nothing wrong with being emotional.”

“I don’t want to embarrass myself. In front of you.”

“There’s nothing for you to be embarrassed about. It’s normal; to get emotional and show and talk about feelings. Even guys like me do it.”

“Really?”

He nods. “I didn’t do it for a long time. I was always scared to. And then I met your mum, and she taught me that it was alright to show that side of myself. To get angry and sad. To even cry sometimes.”

“YOU cry?”

“Everyone does. Or everyone should, at least.”

“And mumma taught you that?”

“Your mum taught me a lot of things. About myself. And about others and how to treat them. What do you want to ask me?”

Millie releases a long, heavy sigh as she steels her emotions. “Do you think he’ll like me? When he meets me?”

“Who is ‘he’?”

“My dad.”

His entire body tenses; throat and jaw tightening, stomach clenching.

Millie continues, not noticing his sudden discomfort. “My daddy lives really, really, REALLY far away. We’ve never actually seen each other. And momma said that when I’m a bit older, she’s going to take me to meet him. And I wanna meet him, but I’m scared. That he won’t like me.”

“Why wouldn’t he like you? What’s not to like?”

“What if he thinks I’m annoying? ‘Cause I talk so much? Or what if he thinks I’m too noisy and too messy and too bossy and that I need to go live somewhere else? Away from mom.”

“Did someone say all those things? About you? Is that why you’re afraid he will?”

“Alessio. He didn’t like me being around. He said I was ‘too much’. That I needed to be taught how to behave ‘cause mom obviously never bothered to do it. He wanted to send me away. To a special school. Where I’d have to live. Instead of with momma.” Her lower lip and chin wobble as tears sparkle in her eyes. “I don’t want to be away from momma. I’d miss her too much. I’d cry all the time.”

“No one is going to take you away from your mum. You’re going to stay with her. Until you grow up and you meet some nice guy and…”

“Or girl. It could be a girl, too. That’s okay, you know. If girls love girls and boys love boys.”

“...and you have little ones of your own. Then you’ll want your own space. To raise your family.”

“But somewhere close to mom. Real close. Maybe next door. ‘Cause I don’t want to be far away. What if I need her? Or what if she needs me?”

“Then you live as close as you can to her. But still be under your own roof. No one is going to take you from your mum. She’d never let that happen. I’D never let that happen.”

“He was mean. Alessio. Mom and him fought all the time. Is it my fault? That they did?”

“No. It’s not. And nothing that happened the other night is your fault, either. You know that, yeah?”

She nods.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t cause them to fight. They fought because your mum was sticking up for you. Because she would do anything to protect you. And he didn’t like that.”

“And because he’s a drongo!”

“He definitely is. A big fucking drongo.”

Clamping a hand over her mouth, she giggles at his words.

“And why would your dad not like you? What’s not to like?”

“Because I can be super loud. And messy. And a bit too much.”

“You’re four. You’re supposed to be loud and messy. And a bit too much.”

“So you think he will? Like me?”

“No. I don’t think he’ll like you. I think he’ll love you. How can he not? You’re his little girl. His baby. So unless he’s a complete asshole…”

“He’s not. Momma said he’s a really nice guy. And momma wouldn’t lie about that. If he was a jerk, she’d say so. And she wouldn’t take me to meet him, that’s for sure.”

“What else has your mum said? About your dad?”

“Just that he lived really far away and that he was a good person with a really good heart. That she wished things could have been different and that she never had to leave. It made her sad, you know. That she couldn’t stay. It made her cry. Talking about it. I don’t like it when mom cries. It hurts my heart.”

“Hurts my heart, too.”

“And she said she loved him. Very much. And that she always would.”

He noisily clears his throat in a desperate attempt to wash away the lump of emotion that threatens to choke him.

“Do you think he loves her? Still?”

“Maybe. You’d have to ask him that.”

“Can I tell you something?”

Tyler nods.

“I’m also scared that he’ll want momma back. ‘Cause we’ll be living with you. And you love momma, and she loves you, and we’re gonna be a family, right?”

“That’s what I want.”

“But what if he wants momma for himself? And you have to fight over her?”

“I’m not worried about that. I already know I’d win.”

“I don’t want to be away from momma, but I don’t wanna be away from you, either. I want to meet him, but I don’t want to live with him. I want to live with YOU. You wouldn’t let him take us, would you? You’d stop him, right? If he tried to force us?”

“He wouldn’t stand a chance. I’m not giving you or your mumma up. You guys are stuck with me.”

“If he doesn’t like me, will you punch him in the face?”

“If you ask me too. But you don’t have to worry about that. He’ll like you. He’ll LOVE you.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

“And you promise you won’t let him take us? To live with him? Like I said, I wanna meet him, not live with him.”

“You and your mom aren’t going anywhere.”

“What if mom goes? If she does, can I stay with you? I’m sure my dad’s a good guy, but he probably can’t protect me like you can. He’d probably be scared of the bad guys. And he’s probably not as awesome as you. With the cool hair and all the tattoos and stuff. I bet he’s not like that. At all.”

“You won’t know until you meet him. But even if he is cool, there’s no way he’s as cool as me.”

“Oh god…” Millie gives a dramatic gasp. “...what if it turns out he’s a basic bitch?”

“No one as awesome as you could ever come from someone that’s a basic bitch.”

“That’s a really good point.”

“Your dad is going to love you. Don’t ever doubt that. And don’t ever doubt how much your mum already DOES love you. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do for you, Millie. You’re her baby. You always will be. No matter how old you get.”

“Momma always wanted to be a mommy. Did you know that?”

“I do. We used to talk about it. And we used to talk about having babies. Together.”

“Really?”

Tyler nods. “We wanted to get married. Have a family. And then things fell apart, and we broke up.”

“But if you didn’t break up, she never would have met my dad. And I wouldn’t be here.”

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

“What’s that mean?”

“Let’s just say that if something is meant to be, it’ll be. If someone is meant to be in your life, you’ll find your way back to them. No matter how long it’s been since you last saw them. And I haven’t seen your mum in a long time.”

“But you still love her?”

“I love your mumma very much. More than I ever thought I could love someone. And you know who else I love?”

The four-year-old shakes her head.

“You.”

Millie squeals when she’s scooped up and thrown high over his head; dissolving into giggles when he effortlessly catches her effortlessly and then tickles and lightly pinches her sides. He switches to pressing endless kisses over every inch of her face until she’s laughing hysterically; squirming and complaining that his beard is scratching her. And when he at last collapses onto his back, bringing her tiny body to rest on top of him, she wraps both arms around his neck. Noisily kissing each of his cheeks, and then beaming down at him.

“I love you, too.”

*****

After helping settle Millie for the night, he meets with Nik and Yaz in the former’s hotel room; slowly and meticulously going over his end of the extraction. Pouring over the blueprints of the hotel’s ‘bowels’ spread across the table as Yaz paces the floor; laptop in hand as he verbally rifles off pertinent information. Nik stands alongside Tyler; hunched over the papers, using a red marker to circle and isolate important spots on the map.

“The route will take you through a few different places,” Yaz announces, pausing his pacing in order to take a swig of coffee. “This is the order: secondary kitchen, boiler room, laundry facilities, and an underground bunker.”

Tyler uses the tip of his index finger to trace the path. “What’s the bunker? What’s the story of that?”

“It’s where Winston hides out during ‘intense situations,’” Nik explains. “It’s highly stocked; every handheld weapon you can possibly think of. And its corresponding ammo.”

Tyler smirks. “Something tells me it’s not your basic ‘shelter in place.’ I highly doubt he hangs out somewhere with concrete walls and bare lightbulbs.”

“It’s as luxurious and over the top as you’d expect from him,” Yaz pipes up. “He’s known to hold ‘executive meetings’ and talks with weapons dealers in there. It’s how we first met him. Years ago.”

“There’s no other way to the loading docks? That doesn’t take me right past his little hideout?”

Yaz shakes his head. “None. When it comes to the blueprints, what you see is what you get. Everything that is available to us is right there. There’s no secret passages, no hidden hallways, no indirect path. It’s this way, or no way.”

“And there’s no other options? When it comes to exits?”

“This is the safest route out of The Continental. There’s too much foot traffic if you go in any other direction. This is the only path that’s NOT heavily patrolled by security. And trust me, this place doesn’t just have regular, run-of-the-mill guards to keep things running smoothly and make sure people stay in line. They’re heavily armed. AND expertly trained. You take a different way and run into half a dozen or more…”

“Yaz and I have walked every possible path, documented every step,” Nik says. “None of them give you even the slightest chance of going unseen and unheard like this one does. It’s too risky any other way.”

“Can’t exactly go unseen and unheard if I have to go right past it. I’m leading her right to the wolves. If Winston is hanging out in there and he hears us…”

“It’s a secure room,” Yaz explains. “It’s essentially a vault; with walls thicker and more secure than anything you’d see at even the most high end of banks.”

“A bomb could go off right outside the door, and whoever’s inside wouldn’t even hear it,” his sister adds. “There is no way if he WAS holed up inside, that Winston would know you’re even out there.”

Tyler sighs. “Just the thought of taking her right past his doorstep…”

“This whole place is his doorstep,” Nik reminds him. “There’s no one hundred percent foolproof way to get out of here. In the end, it comes down to picking the least of the evils and just going with it. Hoping for the best.”

“That’s hardly reassuring. This isn’t exactly the job I want to resort to just ‘hoping for the best’. I can’t just cross my fingers and hold my breath and pray that everything’s going to work out. If it wasn’t so personal…”

“We wouldn’t have decided on this route if we had any other option. You know that we’d never put you at risk. That we’d…”

“I don’t care about me. This comes with the territory; putting my ass on the line. But taking her right into the lion’s den? And just hoping nothing goes wrong? That’s not good enough, Nik. That’s not NEARLY good enough.”

“If there were any other options, we would have found them. But this is it, Tyler. It HAS to be this way. There’s nothing else. It’s this way or no way.”

Heaving a sigh, he runs his hands through his hair and down his weary face. Stepping away, he pours himself a cup of coffee from the carafe on the window sill; his back to the others as he nurses his drink and stares into the night. And he finds himself marvelling at the neighbouring buildings; blazing pillars of light that climb high into the black canvas of sky. And in that moment, in a city of millions and in the midst of the hustle and bustle, he’s never felt so…done. Tired of the job and everything that comes with it; the danger and the unpredictability from one moment to the next. He finally feels ready; confident in the decision to -when the final mission is finished and the coast is truly clear- to walk away from it all. To concentrate on creating a normal life; pouring his attention and his energy into firefighting and running his own business. And being a husband and a father. Someone that Esme and Millie can rely on. Not just to protect them, but to provide for them.

Love them.

Nik joins him at the window, uncapping a bottle of water and taking a sip. “Talk to me.”

“About?”

“You’re unsettled. This isn’t like you. You’re usually focused. You have your head on straight. You never break a sweat. Now…”

“This isn’t a regular gig, Nik. You can’t expect me to act like it is.”

“I HAVE to expect it. In the same way YOU have to treat it like you would any job I give you. You can’t let your heart overrule your brain. It’s dangerous. Life threatening. If you start feeling too much…”

“How can I not? This is as personal as it gets. This isn’t just random people I’ve been hired to help. It isn’t my ex-sister-in-law and her kids. This is MY kid. And it’s Esme. MY Esme. These aren’t regular clients.”

“You have to treat them like they are. If you don’t…”

“I can’t just turn it off. Maybe six, seven years ago, I would have been able to. I would have been able to separate THAT Tyler from THIS Tyler. But now…”

“This was a bad idea. Getting you involved. And I told her that. That calling you was the worst thing we could do. That I had other people that could handle this sort of job and…”

“Calling me was the best thing you could have done. For more reasons than one.”

“We’re not going to talk about that. Now isn’t the time. Now…”

“You should have called me a long time ago. About Millie. You had every chance to tell me; that I had a kid out there. And the least you could have done was tell me Esme was alive. You have had every opportunity to put my mind at ease. To let me know that she was okay.”

“I already have explained. Why I did what I did. And I’ve already apologized. I’ve…”

“I don’t care about your apology. I don’t need you to keep saying, ‘I’m sorry.’ Remember when you gave me shit? For not telling you it was my ex-wife who hired me in Georgia? How you talked about not needing my apology but my trust? That should have went both ways. Because now? After everything you’ve done? Everything you COULD HAVE done? How am I supposed to trust YOU?”

She blinks, taken back by his honesty.

“I can’t do this anymore. Not even as a side gig. I can’t keep putting myself out there. Everything’s changed. The second Esme walked back into my life…”

“Don’t make any hasty decisions. Right now, you’re running on pure emotion. You’re…”

“She’s going to need me, Nik. And not like THIS. She doesn’t need mercenary me. She needs a partner and husband and a father to her little girl. And any kids that might come after that. She needs me home. Safe. She shouldn’t be watching me walk out the front door and then spending days…weeks…wondering if I’m going to walk back in.”

“You’re going to have all the time in the world to think about quitting. When this job is done and I’ve taken care of things here in the city, and there’s no more threat…”

“I don’t need any more time. My mind was made up the second I saw her. As soon as she walked into the room and I realized she was the one who hired me, that was it. I don’t need to think about it.”

“Is it what she wants? You walking away?”

“It’s what she deserves. This life? It’s not good for her. And it’s definitely not good for Millie. It’s time, Nik. This is it. No more. No more calling me and asking for favours. I’m done. And if that means you lose my number and forget I ever existed, then that’s the way it has to be.”

“That would never happen. Whether you work for me or not.”

“Esme and Millie have to be first. I made that mistake with Mia; putting the military before her and our boy. I’m not going to do it again. Not with Esme. Not with the love of my life. I lost her once. I’m not going to lose her again.”

“And you’ve talked about this? With her? You’ve…”

“We’re getting married. As soon as we can. Just something small. The two of us and Millie and a couple of witnesses. We have five years to make up for. We’re not going to waste any time.”

“And you’ll be happy? Giving this up? Entirely?”

“Maybe not at first. But it’s something I HAVE to do. I have a family now.”

“You’ve had a family all this time. Yaz and me and…”

“It’s not the same, and you know it. I have a daughter. I’m going to be a husband. And those are the two things I have to concentrate on. I need to give them a normal life. Away from all of this. They deserve better. From me.”

Sighing, she nods slowly as she considers his words)

“You’ll find someone else. That annoys you as much as I do.”

“Maybe that’s true. But I definitely won’t find someone that can do the job nearly as good as you.”

“Maybe it’s time for you to move on, too. Do something else with your life. Remember what you told me? In Austria? About how my entire life fit inside one little box? And how I should do something about it. Well, it’s taken me a couple of years, but that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

“If anyone deserves a shot at a normal life…”

“And maybe you should take your own advice. You can’t tell me this is all you want. Being caught up in all of this. You can’t tell me this is the only kind of life that makes you happy? What about filling your own boxes? When are you going to start on that?”

A smirk tugs at the corner of her mouth. “I’m not taking personal life advice from you. Considering the mess you made of things by getting hooked up with Delaney…”

“I know I’m not the guy who should be talking. I don’t exactly have the best track record; when it comes to women and marriage and having kids. But this can’t be it. This can’t be all you want. And don’t even try and lie; I know when you’re full of shit.”

Managing a small laugh, she reaches out to rub his upper arm. “I hope it all works out for you. I hope you and Esme go on to get married and stay that way for a few decades. I hope you have more babies. And grandbabies. I hope you get your happily ever after.”

“So do I.”

“But for now, can we concentrate on other things? On what’s in front of us? Because none of that will happen for you if you don’t get Esme out of here. If that goes wrong…”

Tyler sips his coffee. “I’ve got…concerns.”

“About the plan? The route?”

“I’m not thrilled with having to take her that away; parade right past where Winston might be hanging out. But if there really is no other choice, I’ll make it work.”

“There Is no other option. Believe me, I would have given you one if there were.”

“It’s more than that. Something doesn’t feel right. Something ISN’T right.”

“In what way?”

“Winston’s been way too quiet. Since that sniper tried to take Millie and me out. He hasn’t come up to the suite once; to see how she’s holding up. Don’t you find that a little odd? Considering he calls her his granddaughter? You don’t find it strange that he hasn’t bothered to check if she’s okay?”

“It’s more than a little odd. Much more.”

“All he cared about was the room getting shot up. Us ‘making a mess’ of things. Bringing trouble here. Other than taking the time to try and reem you out…”

“He learned very quickly. That NO ONE speaks to me like that.”

“...he hasn’t made any attempt to contact Esme. And I know that should make me happy; considering he’s got some kind of fucked up old man crush on her…”

“It’s unsettling.”

“Very. He spent how many months keeping her safe here? After that adjudicator showed up at our place, and Esme took off? Better part of a year, yeah?”

Nik nods.

“Even after that, when she finally could go on with her life, he kept tabs on her. Made sure that no one was watching her or causing her trouble. And look how fast he came to the rescue this time. When she and Millie needed a place to hide out.”

“He isn’t just seeing her as a daughter. I’ve always said it; that the way he feels goes far beyond what a parent would feel for a child. It never sat well with me; how much he doted on her and needed to be around her.”

“It’s fucked up. Not just how he feels about her, but how far he’s willing to go to keep her here. Under his thumb. And away from me. Offering me the money to walk away, threatening me, having a sniper try and take me out…”

“We don’t know that was him. That organized that. We…”

“All of that, and now suddenly he’s disappeared? Gone silent? He doesn’t give a shit about her anymore? He hasn’t bothered to check up on her or Millie? It doesn’t make sense. Something isn’t right, Nik.”

“Is that your brain or your gut telling you that?”

“A bit of both.”

“I’ve already told you to listen to your instincts; that they’re very rarely wrong. And if something doesn’t feel right to you…”

“It feels FAR from right.”

“You think he knows what we’re up to? Do you think we might have a mole? That’s tipped him off?”

“It’s possible. He could be just lying in wait. For us to make a move. Is there anyone that you don’t trust? On the team? That sat in on the plans and might have shared the info?”

“I wouldn’t have them here if I didn’t trust them.”

“If he knows what we’re up to, we’re fucked. He’ll be on us before I even get Esme anywhere near the exit. And if he knows what day and time…”

“You’re thinking he might ambush you.”

“Not just him. If he does have a small army of these highly trained security people…”

“Should we change the date? The time? We can’t change the path. There’s no other route to take. And if we’re not out of here before the deadline he’s given us…”

“How comfortable do you feel going to him?”

“It’s pretty much the last thing I want to do, but…”

“What if I asked you to go and talk to him? Try and find out what he knows. See if you can convince him to give us some extra time?”

“Stay here even longer? Tyler…”

“Not actually stay here. But put it in his head that we’re going to, then leak a fake date and time. If he thinks we’re taking off then, that opens the door for the plan we already have. Puts him off our scent.”

“You think he’d fall for that?”

“I don’t know. But at this point, I’m willing to try anything. I HAVE to get her out of here. Without him knowing. Because if he catches on and tries to stop me…”

“If you kill him, you’re just opening up a whole new world of hurt for yourself. And for Esme and Millie.”

“If he gets in my way, I won’t have a choice. Because he’ll stop at nothing to keep her here. And I can’t let that happen. I can’t let him get his hands on her. She’s not his to have.”

“The High Table will come for you. If you kill him, they won’t let you have a moment’s rest. They will track you down. And what kind of life is that? Living with that fear?”

“I’m not scared of them.”

“You should be. Because they won’t think twice about using Esme or Millie to get to you. If you kill Winston and manage to get out of here, you will have a target on your back for the rest of your life.”

“I’ve had one on my back for years.”

“Not from THEM you haven’t. Why would you want to take that risk? Having The High Table after you? Why…?”

“He gets in my way, I will take him out.”

“Don’t do it, Tyler. You may not care about your life, but it isn’t just you anymore. Think about Esme. And Millie. They don’t deserve to live with that kind of fear. And they certainly don’t deserve to lose you. You just got Esme back. You just found out you’re a dad again. Why…?”

“If he doesn’t give me a choice, I’m doing what I have to. To get her out of here.”

“You won’t be safe anywhere. Wherever you run to, they’ll follow. They WILL find you. I’m warning you, Tyler. Don’t do it. Find another way. To deal with him. IF it happens. But don’t do THAT. Anything but that.”

“I can’t make any promises, Nik. Because if he tries to stop me or he hurts her in any way…”

“I am begging you NOT to do it. To not go that route. You can’t take it back. You can’t make things right. If you take him out, you’re signing your own death certificate. You know that, right?”

“I’ll do what I have to do. To get Esme out of here. And if they come for me…”

“Not if. When. WHEN they come for you.”

“Then I deal with it. I pay the price. But you gotta promise me one thing. If that happens.”

“I’m not putting my support behind this. I can’t. I can’t give you my blessing. Not for this. I’m sorry. I…”

“I want you to take care of them. Esme and Millie. Make sure they’re alright. If I’m not around to do it…”

“Don’t talk like that. Don’t…”

“Just promise me, yeah? You’ve done it before; made sure they were safe and taken care of. I’m sure you can do it again. Promise me, Nik. That if something happens to me and I can’t do it myself, you’ll take care of my family. For however long you have to.”

“Tyler…”

“Promise me. That Esme and Millie will be okay. That you’ll keep an eye on them.”

Nik relents. “I promise. But let’s hope it doesn’t come down to that.”

“Yeah…” Sighing, he turns back to the window. “...let’s hope.”

******

It’s after midnight when he returns to the suite; quietly letting himself into the bedroom and then navigating the space by way of the moonlight streaming through the gaps in the curtains. Slipping out of his clothes and tossing them in the open suitcase near the window, he gingerly pulls the blankets back and slips in next to her. A hand on her stomach as he presses his front to her back; eyes closing as he buries his face in her hair and inhales deeply. Taking in that familiar scent. Desperately needing the comfort. The closeness.

“You’re making a habit of this,” Esme teases, her voice quiet, laced with sleep. And she pushes her fingers through his; giving an initial squeeze and then tightly holding his hand. “Coming to bed really late.”

“I’m sorry.” He presses a kiss to the nape of her neck. “It ran longer than I thought it would.”

“Everything went okay? There’s no major changes I need to know about?”

“The plan’s staying the same. I’m not hundred percent on board with it, but considering there’s no other options…”

“Nik wouldn’t take unnecessary risks. With either of us. If she’s adamant that this is the only way it can go…”

“I think I’m just being paranoid. If it wasn’t you and Millie caught up in all this, I’d just go with whatever idea Nik drew up. But seeing as it’s so personal…”

“But do you feel better about things? Then you did last night? Because that spooked me; you questioning everything and not having a lot of confidence in how it’s going to go down. You’re not like that. Not when it comes to the job.”

“This isn’t just any job,” he reminds her.

“You’re going to have to try and focus. You’re going to put your feelings on the back burner and just go with your instincts. Pretend that this IS just like any other job. Because that’s what I need from you. When the time comes. I need THAT Tyler.”

“I’m fucking trying, believe me. But it’s a lot easier said than done.”

“I trust you. To get it together. When it comes to work, you’ve always been able to shut everything else out. Maybe not get rid of it entirely, but at least put it on the back burner. You’re going to have to treat this like it IS just another job.”

“You have a lot of faith in me. You always have.”

“Well, someone needs to.” She rolls over onto her side, eyes briefly closing as he places a kiss on her brow). “How DID it go?”

“It went. We finalized things. And got some loose ends tied up.”

“So that means you’re more confident? About how things are going to go?”

“Yeah…” Leaning in, he nuzzles her temple with the tip of her nose and then pecks her cheek. “...much more.”

“Everything’s going to go nice and smooth,” she enthuses. “According to plan. We’re not going to have any setbacks, no one is going to fuck anything up, people aren’t going to get in our way. Things are going to be perfect and uncomplicated.”

“When did the roles suddenly reverse? Aren’t I normally the one trying to convince you?”

“I can admit, I am usually a touch neurotic…”

“That’s the understatement of the century.”

“...and you are usually the one talking me down off a ledge. But I feel good about this. I feel like everything is going to be fine. That we won’t have any roadblocks. We’ll just get the hell out of here…”

“While I want to share your optimism, when do things ever go smoothly? On the job?”

“I mean, I’ve had a couple of gigs that weren’t major disasters. They weren’t flawless by any stretch of the imagination, but…”

“Remember Dhaka? How easy we thought it would be? After I got a hold of Ovi? That we’d get him to the boat, and we’d be free and clear? Do you remember that?”

“Unfortunately, very well.”

“Believe me, I WANT this to go nice and smooth. No hiccups, no one getting in my way and trying to stop us from leaving. I want that more than anything. But you’ve said it yourself; these people don’t accept defeat easily. They’re not just going to roll over if we DO get out of her.”

“WHEN we get out of here,” she gently corrects. “WHEN.”

“I just don’t want you putting all your eggs in one basket. It’s good to be confident and optimistic, but…”

“It can lead to bad decisions. Stupid mistakes. You get too cocky…”

“Just err on the side of caution, yeah? That’s all I’m asking.”

“Are you asking or telling? Because if it’s the latter, you’re starting your bossiness a little early. I technically don’t have to listen to you until it’s ‘go time’.”

“Who are you trying to kid? You’re not even going to listen to me AFTER that.”

“I promise I will be on my best behaviour.”

“I know what your best behaviour is. And while it’s a step up…”

“I will be completely unproblematic. I will listen to every word the big, bad, mercenary man has to say.”

Grinning, he presses a feathery to the corner of her mouth. “You are so full of shit.”

“You just want to be the boss of me,” she chides and wraps both arms around his neck. “You don’t get to wear the pants very often, but when you do…”

“I wear the pants all the time.”

“You keep telling yourself that. Everyone knows I’m the one in charge. That I’m the boss. I just let you take over every now and then. Stroke your ego. Feed your masculinity.”

“You’re just a regular bleeding heart.”

“And, there are times I DO like you being all aggressive and assertive and bossy. You have to admit, it’s always at the best possible times. The naked ones. Not even you can deny that’s your favourite time to be in charge.”

“I’ll admit to nothing.”

“You don’t have to. The evidence speaks for itself.”

“What evidence is that?”

“I’d say eleven inches poking me in the stomach, or the ass is usually all the proof I need.”

“Eleven? Come on now…”

“Ten and a half? Ten?”

“You are really good for my ego.”

“We’ll have to get an official number. An accurate measurement. I’m sure we’ll be able to track down a tape measure or a ruler when we get to Australia. Inquiring minds want to know.”

“You’re an odd duck, you know that?”

“I like my weirdness. All my quirks and eccentricities. You’ve missed them. Over the course of the last five years. Admit it.”

“I have, actually. I’ve missed a lot of things.” Hooking a finger under her chin, he tilts her face upwards; covering her mouth with his in a long, soft kiss. So pure and beautiful; nothing hurried or aggressive, nor teeming with unbridled lust or overwhelming want and need. A kiss at its most innocent point: adoring, tender, languid. Yet somehow enough to curl her toes and take her breath away.

She gives a sigh when it ends, her eyes remaining closed when he rolls over onto his back; settling her much smaller, lighter frame on top of his.

For five years, she’d longed for this; the smoothness of his skin and the hardness of his muscles. The way his calloused fingers tip continuously skim up and down her spine, his familiar scent and the sound of his voice and how she is able to feel its rumbling deep within his chest. Desperately missing him nearly every second of every day; wanting nothing more than to pick up the phone and beg and plead for forgiveness and end up in his life and his arms and his bed once again. But it had always seemed so far out of reach; believing she was past redemption. Even if he could accept her running away, there was no way he’d ever forgive her for keeping his daughter a secret. Not after the tremendous loss he’d already suffered; still wracked with guilt, regret, and profound grief when it came to the death of his son.

****

“Did you talk to Millie?” His fingertips drift down her spine and briefly settle at the small of her back; a lone fingertip commencing the tracing of the elaborate tattoo that stretches from one hip to the other. “About going with Alcott.”

“I was going to do it tomorrow. Well, today now. After breakfast.”

“I want to be there. When you tell her. I mean, as long as you’re okay with that.”

“Of course, I’m okay with it. You’re her father.”

“Only she doesn’t know what, does she? She has no clue.”

“We’ve talked about this. About when we’re going to tell her. I thought we agreed that…”

“She asked me about him today. Her dad.”

“What do you mean she asked about him? She brought him up out of nowhere? Why did she want to know? What…?”

“She asked me if I thought he’d like her. When she got to meet him. Can you imagine being a little kid and wondering something like that? If your old man is even going to WANT you?”

“No. I can’t even begin to imagine that.”

“She’s four years old. And she’s asking stuff like THAT? She’s worried that she’s going to meet him and he’s going to hate her? Find her a nuisance? Think she’s too loud and too messy and…”

“A bit too much,” Esme finishes for him. “She said that to me once. When she asked about him. About YOU. She said she was worried he’d find her annoying. I just chalked it up to Alessio being a total prick to her. I didn’t think she really felt that way. About herself.”

“She’s just a little girl. And she's carrying around shit like that? How could you have him around her? How could you put her through it? Him treating her like that?”

“I didn’t have a choice. I was in the middle of a job, and if I let my guard down or he found exactly who I was…”

“You should have told Nik you wanted out. The second he started treating Millie like that. As soon as he tried breaking her spirit, that should have been it. You should have got the fuck out of there. She didn’t deserve any of it. Being treated like that.”

“I thought we weren’t going to do this.” Moving away from him, she slaps and shoves his hands away when he tries to prevent her from sitting up. “Not here. Not right now. I thought we were going to wait until we were in Australia and somewhat settled before we talked about all of this. I thought…”

Sitting up, he stretches out his legs and leans back against the headboard. “I can’t do it, Esme. I can’t pretend that everything’s okay. That I’m not pissed off. That I’m not hurt. Do you know what it’s like? When everyone around you has a bigger role in your own kid’s life? All people tell me about is what Millie was like as a baby, all the things that they’ve done for her and with her.”

“They’re not telling you those things to hurt you. They’re just sharing what they know about her. So you can get to know her better.”

“All I hear from people is how they’re her family.”

“It’s because they are. Maybe not a conventional one, but…”

“I’M her family. You didn’t make that baby alone. And I didn’t see any of them making that kid with you either. So unless there’s someone you’re not telling me about…”

“Don’t do that. Say shit like that. I know you’re upset. And you have every right to be. I’ve never once tried to take that away from you. Or tried to downplay it. But you have no reason to question whether or not she belongs to you. Just look at her! She IS you! From head to toe. You’re just lashing out and trying to hurt me, and you know exactly how to do it.”

“I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m…”

“Just admit it, Tyler. Just admit that there’s a part of you that wants to punish me. Make me pay for what I did to you. I’m not going to judge you or hate you for it. I get it, alright? I did a horrible thing; keeping Millie away from you. And you have every right to want to punish me for that.”

“No. I don’t. I’m not like that. I’m not that kind of person. I would never hurt you.”

“I see it in you, sometimes. I’ll catch you looking at me a certain way. And I’ll see it; all this hurt and anger that you’ve got built inside of you. So just tell me the truth. I’m a big girl. I know my mistakes. I admit to them. I own them. So don’t…”

“I don’t want to fight, Esme. That’s not why I brought any of this up. That’s not why…”

“If you didn’t want to fight, you wouldn’t have thrown Millie in my face like that. You don’t think I know how badly I fucked up? Bringing her into that kind of life? You think I don’t feel like complete and utter shit for what happened? What she went through? What she KEEPS going through? You think I like any of this? Having to hide here? Having to hire a fucking mercenary to get us out here and…”

“So that’s how you see me. That’s all you see me as?”

“I never said. Don’t put words in my mouth. I’ve never seen you as JUST that. It’s part of you, but it’s not ALL of you. And I’ve never once thought it was. Who was the one who always talked you down? Every time you’d mention that you did nothing but kill people for a living? Who was the one person that reminded you that you did so much more? Who always tried to convince you that you weren’t the monster you saw yourself as?”

“You.”

“I stayed on that bridge because you deserved a second chance. Because you made your amends. And selfishly, I stayed because I wanted more of you. I wanted more time. I wanted all those plans that we made; I wanted to travel and see the world and fall in love. With YOU.”

“It didn’t exactly go that way, did it.”

“No. It didn’t. But you know what? What we had was good. It was so good. It wasn’t perfect. But neither are we. We had what we needed, and that was enough. We were happy. Weren’t we?”

“We were.”

“I love you. I have always loved you. I always WILL love you. So don’t you ever accuse me of anything else. And never…and I mean never…try and tell me I don’t love my daughter. OUR daughter.”

“I would never say that.” He slides down the bed and reaches for her when she begins to cry; frowning when she pushes him away and stands. Moving to the table in front of the window and leaning back against it; sniffling noisily as she wipes at her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want you to be sorry. I want you to be honest. I need that from you, okay? I know you’re afraid of hurting me; it’s why you won’t just come right out and tell me how you’re really feeling or what’s really going on in your head. But I NEED that, Tyler. Because until you’re truthful about it, I can’t start to make amends. How can I move on and heal when you won’t even acknowledge what I did to you?

“I don’t understand why you need me to be angry. Why..?”

“Because it’s holding me accountable. For what I did. I don’t want you coddling me and holding my hand and patting me on the head and treating me like I’m some fragile little thing. Do you think I’m not going to love you? If you’re honest about everything? Is that what you’re afraid of?”

“I don’t know,” he admits, and swings his legs over the side of the bed. “I guess. Maybe? I don’t want you to think I hate you. Because I don’t. I never could.”

“I know you love me. I know it without you even having to say it. It’s in everything you do. It’s like those five years never even happened. The way you look at me and the way you touch and kiss me and make love to me. It’s like none of the bad stuff ever happened. And I don’t know what I did to deserve that. The way you feel about me. Or if I even DO deserve it. But I don’t question it. Sometimes it’s the only thing I’m sure of.”

“I just don’t see what good can come of it. Me just letting it all out. I don’t understand why you need me to be out there with it. Why can’t you just let me deal with this alone and…”

“That’s the old Tyler. The one that existed BEFORE me. He’s the one that died on that bridge. You’re not HIM. And you haven’t been him in a long time.”

“Maybe I went back to it. Being him. During the last five years.”

“There’s no way. Because you weren’t happy. Being that way. Being HIM. And you worked way too hard after Dhaka. To become better and DO better. There’s no way you’d go back to that.”

“I think you have way too much faith in me.”

“I think you don’t have enough. You would never go back to being like that. I know you. I know your heart. I know…”

“You don’t know a thing about my heart. And you know why? Because you broke it. You fucking tore it out of my chest and stomped all over it. And you expect it to be what it was before you did that?”

“If you were the old Tyler, you wouldn’t have stayed. When you found out I was the one that hired you. You would have turned around and walked out, and that would have been it.”

“I would have stayed. For Millie. I would have done it for her.”

“No, you wouldn’t have. It wouldn’t have mattered. Millie or no Millie, you would have left. The old Tyler? The one with the death wish? The one who didn’t give a fuck about anything except catching a bullet? He would have been long gone.”

“I would have never walked away from her. Even if I wanted to walk away from you, I’d never turn my back on my own kid. I did that once. I wouldn’t do it again. I learned the first time.”

“Is that why you’re here? Why you REALLY want things to work with us? Is that…?”

“I wouldn’t be sharing a bed with you and fucking you. Don’t insult me like that. I know I can be a real dick sometimes, but I’d never lower myself to that. And I would never use you. No matter how pissed off I am.”

“I was just asking. I was just…”

“I’m here because I love you. Because even though you ripped my heart out of my fucking chest and ruined my life, I still want you. In every way. And maybe that makes me a fucking idiot. Maybe I’m just pathetic. A simp. I don’t know. But I love you, and I never stopped loving you. Millie? She’s just this extra piece. This fucking amazing, beautiful, perfect piece.”

“She is pretty amazing, isn’t she.”

“I would never…EVER…accuse you of not loving her. I see you with her. Your entire face lights up when she walks in the room. And every time she hugs you or tells you she loves you or even just calls you ‘mummy’? To me, you’re beautiful all the time. But when she does those things? You’re the most beautiful I’ve ever seen you.”

“She’s my baby. I had wanted to be a mom for so long. And you gave me the chance. You gave me HER. And I could thank you enough for that. For giving me her. Because aside from you, she’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

“I know you love her. More than you love yourself. More than you love me. And that’s how it should be. You’re an amazing mum; no one could ever deny that. Or say anything different. Everything you’ve done for her; taking care of her on your own, keeping her safe, managing to bring up this awesome little human. You know how many women wouldn’t have even had her? Considering the circumstances?”

“There was no way I wasn’t going through with it. She was my connection to you. My ONLY connection.”

“Thank you, Esme. Maybe that sounds weird; considering I AM angry and I AM hurt. But thank you. For her. I know it wasn’t the most conventional of ways to find out I’m a dad. But still. Thank you.”

“Please don’t say that. Not after everything I did. Please don’t…”

“She wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. I wouldn’t have gotten a second chance at this; at being a dad. It’s just the truth.”

Sniffling, she uses the bottom of her t-shirt to wipe away her tears. “You’ve always been nothing if not honest.”

“You broke us. What we had? You destroyed that. And you’re right; it wasn’t perfect. But it WAS good. It was so fucking good.”

“And now? You don’t think it’s good NOW? You don’t think we can get back to that?”

“I don’t want to go back to that. I want to be BETTER than that. We’re not those same two people anymore. We’ve both changed. Mostly for the better, I like to think. Do you want that? For things to be even better?”

Esme nods. “That’s all I want.”

“Then just look at me and tell me why. Why did it have to get to this? Why did five years have to go by? Why…?”

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.”

“That’s not an acceptable answer for anyone over seven, and you know it.”

“I was scared. I was selfish. I was so worried about being rejected. And I couldn’t get past that feeling. That fear.”

“I never would have rejected you. Or her.”

“Logically, I knew that. But sometimes, logic isn’t an easy thing to come by.”

“How could you do that to me? Leave like that? After everything we’d been through. After nine months in that fucking hospital. Three quarters of a year, you stayed there. You fought for me. You were the only one who didn’t give up. And then you go and do something like THAT? Just leave?”

“I wanted to protect you. You’d already been through so much. You shouldn’t even have been alive. But you WERE. And I didn’t want it on my conscience; losing you because of something I did.”

“You didn’t do anything. You thought you were in the free and clear. You were told that you were. Long before you met me. It wasn’t your fault; that The High Table went against their own ruling and came for you. You know that, yeah?”

“I think I do. I think I know that.”

“Why didn’t you just give me a chance? To get you out of that fucking mess? I would have done anything to protect you. If that meant packing up and moving thousands of miles away and hiding out? I would have done it. And if they found us, we would have packed up and found somewhere else to hide. Other people could have dealt with it. The bullshit here.”

“I didn’t even think of that at the time. I was more worried that you’d try and go against them. Physically.”

“Esme, I knew my limits. I was clinically dead a year before. Do you really think I thought I stood a chance against The High Table? Alone? I know I’m not the smartest guy on the planet, but give me SOME credit.”

“You always said you’d do anything for me. To keep me safe. Why wouldn’t I think that?”

“If you had told me what happened…with The Adjudicator…we could have talked about all of this. Avoided you taking off. But you didn’t even give me a chance.”

“I just wanted to protect you.”

“And I love you for that. For thinking you had to. But you didn’t just ruin my life when you left. You ruined yours, too. That’s not protecting me. You should have known that’s the last thing I would want. Hurting yourself like that.”

“It’s just such a mess,” she tearfully laments. “A big fucking mess.”

“And if that wasn’t bad enough? You couldn’t even let me know that you were alive. That something horrible hadn’t happened to you. Do you know what’s been going through my head? For five years? The horrible, gross shit it came up with? Even if you didn’t want me back, the least you could have done was let me know you were alright.”

“I fucked up. Badly. I’m the first to admit that.”

“And then you got Nik and Yaz involved. They’ve had to lie for you. Do you really think that was fair? Getting them tied up in this shit? All you had to do was let me know you were alright. You didn’t have to drag it on. Make things even worse.”

“I didn’t know what else to do. I thought I was keeping you safe. I had the best of intentions. I did. But…”

“Even after things settled? And there was no trouble? You still thought there was a reason to keep me safe?”

She shakes her head. “That was just me being a stupid, selfish bitch.”

“You should have told me about Millie. You know everything about me. Every ugly, deep, dark secret. I’ve never hid anything from you. Especially when it comes to my son and what I did. I was always honest about that. Right from day one. In Dhaka. And you knew I wanted to be a dad again. We talked about it. Having kids. I was scared shitless, but I was willing, wasn’t I?”

Esme nods.

“And yet you kept her from me. For five years. You knew I wanted another kid. That I wanted a chance to do things right. Yet you couldn’t even tell me about her.”

“I didn’t do it to hurt you. I WAS going to tell you. I was going to bring her to Australia. Right to your doorstep. After this job was done…”

“It shouldn't have taken this long. You know there was no reason… REAL reason…to keep her from me. Were you scared? The fact you had a kid with a mercenary? One that’s burned a lot of bridges and…”

“No! That never even crossed my mind. I knew what you were. It was never a secret. I knew what you did for a living. It’s how we MET. And I never once worried about you being her dad.”

“So it was just you being scared. Of being rejected.”

“That’s all it was. I’m telling the truth, Tyler. I know I kept a lot of secrets and I’ve told a lot of lies, and I even made a living out of doing things. But I am telling you the truth. That is the ONLY reason.”

He nods slowly, considering her words. “I believe you.”

“I am so sorry. For everything I’ve done. For hurting you like I did. And I know I can’t go back in time and change it, but…”

“No. You can’t. And I wouldn’t even ask you to. Change one thing, it changes everything. I’ve always said that.”

“...but I can spend the rest of my life making up for it. Or at least trying to.”

“You don’t have to. I don’t want you holding onto this for forty, fifty years. Or more. That’s not what I want.”

“What do you want?”

“I want you. I want US. I want to get married. As soon as possible. I want us to raise Millie together. Be a real family. That has normal jobs and fairly normal lives.”

“That’s what I want, too. I want you to be my husband. I want you to be able to be Millie’s dad. Not have to hide it. I want us to have a home and a nice little backyard with chickens and goats and…”

“And more babies. I want more babies.”

“How many more? I do have to draw the line somewhere.”

“I don’t know. Three. Four.”

“You just want to wreck my vagina, don’t you. You’re determined to do it.”

“Why would I ever want to ruin my favourite part of you?”

She gives a derisive snort.

“I’m kidding.” He holds out a hand; a silent request for her to join him on the edge of the bed. And he gathers her close when she sinks down beside him; both arms wrapping around her tiny frame as he drops a kiss on the top of her head. “It’s not my most favourite. Second favourite, maybe…”

Laughing, she playfully elbows him in the stomach, then tilts her face up towards him. “Do you feel better? Getting all that out?”

“Shockingly, yeah.”

“Me too.”

He kisses her softly; the long and languid press of closed mouth upon closed mouth. “I meant what I said. Five years ago. When I told you that there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”

“I’ve never doubted it.”

“I will get you out of here. Away from this place. This life. And I’ll stop at nothing to make that happen.”

“I believe you.”

“You’ll never have to think about it again. It’ll just be us. And Millie. We’ll make a new life. The one we were supposed to have. Before this all happened.”

Smiling, she presses a series of feathery pecks along his jaw, then rests her head on his shoulder. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

[mistrdctr]

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐍

———  BASICS!

NAME:  L.

PRONOUNS: she/her they/them

ZODIAC SIGN: Aquarius

TAKEN OR SINGLE: Taken (married)

———  THREE  FACTS!

I am a cat mom, I have two british short hair annoyances who I love dearly despite them constantly trying to get my attention 24/7

I am an artist - I have been unable to do much art lately though, but man, I hope I can again soon when my brain lets me again... I sometimes even write fics but whenever I RP here on tumblr, I do not really write fics as all my energy goes into RPing lol

I am self-employed and have an Etsy shop where I sell stuff for jewelry-making. It cannot support my life though, but at least I do something :'D

———  EXPERIENCE!

PLATFORMS USED: I always have been RPing on tumblr, and more recently also on Discord but sparsely so

PLOTTING / WINGING IT / MEMES: I love all of that, honestly! I love plotting, but plotting oftentimes comes hard to me, so winging stuff takes a bit of pressure away and memes can just open up so many possible plot lines that can then be discussed and help to get the muses to know each other and develop a relationship... so yeah!

———  MUSE  PREFERENCE!

GENDER: I always write male muses. Always has been the case, always will be. Idk why that is but I just can work much better with them

MULTI OR SINGLE: I always had single blogs, then started a multi a while ago but immediately turned it back into a single before switching fandoms (lol). I just... can't do multis. I prefer to have 'separate dashes' - it also makes me nervous not to know with which muse someone wants to interact when following me, so single muse blogs it is so I know when someone follows they want the muse I portray there. So man if you are a multi, kudos to you, I could never it's so stressful!

LEAST FAVOURITE FACECLAIM(S): Uh. Interesting question. I think using Yo.utu.bers / blo.gger.s etc as FCs is cringe and I feel uncomfortable with it and I won't interact with you if you do. Also RPing a real-life person as the real-life person, I am not a huge fan of that either and I won't interact

———  FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT

FLUFF: I love it so much. Literally what keeps me alive

ANGST:  I love angst a lot - however, if it happens between muses I ship and/or best-friend muses / muses that are very close (family etc), said angst NEEDS to be mixed into fluff. Like, I love to have very angsty moments that happen in between but I need to have an happy ending to the Angst? I cannot write bad endings for close muses. It fucks with my mental state and writing has always been a happy place for me - so while I love to hurt myself, I need to have something happy to make the pain go away lol does that make sense?

SMUT :  I actually am quite used to writing smut, and I have been writing smut for a long time - and I would say I am okay at doing it (I think lol, so far no one has really complained). So, I am totally okay with smut - but I prefer to have some OOC contact with the other mun and chemistry needs to exist between the muses you know? Also sometimes, while I love writing smut, I just can't write it with my brain going 'ehhh', so I cannot do nonstop smut and would prefer to have smut in between and also other things between the muses happening.

tagged by: Stolen from @ravarui tagging: You! Tag me in it if you take it I wanna read my mutuals' answers ♥

[anchanted-one]

Get to know me

Thanks for the tag @elveny ! 

Share your wallpaper: Unfortunately, I’ve not bothered to customize either my laptop or my phone with wallpapers yet. I wanted to make my own, but haven’t gotten around to it yet. If I make them, they’ll be like a fantasy South Indian Palace :3. Wish me luck!

The last song you listened to: I was listening to Footfalls (Endwalker Theme) before my last class. Love the song, love the trailer: https://youtu.be/zTTtd6bnhFs

Currently Reading: I’m currently not reading anything. I’m focused on my course, my fanfic, and my art. I want to start reading more books again when I’m done. I think I’ll pick up Bluebird by Ciel Pierlot. 

Craving: I’d like... okay this is embarrassing, but I’ve never been in a relationship. Rejected every single time. I would like to have some romance in my life, once I’m stable again. Also, I want to visit NZ, Canada, Sweden, Denmark, Poland, Netherlands, Japan, Chile, or Austria. Definitely France.

What are you wearing right now: White shirt, black shorts. 

How tall are you: Hmmm not sure. 176-178 cm? I’m a bit above average for the Indian man. But not by too much.

Piercings: Had two ear piercings when I was a baby, but they’ve pretty much closed by now.

Tattoos: I have one, an eastern dragon. But I want to remove it someday. 

Glasses? Contacts?: I had really bad eyesight in my childhood. Like, -6.5 or 7.5 iirc. Bad enough that I couldn’t see a light switch on the wall. But I had corrective surgery done shortly after my twentieth. My sight is quite good now.

Last drink: Coca Cola. Rare treat.

Last show: Currently watching Vinlandsaga, Mando S3, and Bad Batch. Waiting on Kimetsu no Yaiba/Demon Slayer Swordsmith Village arc, for which I caught the premiere <3. Will rewatch Naruto and Fairy Tail when I can.

Favourite colour: Red.

Current obsession: My fanfic. I’ve planned a huge, huge story set in SWTOR. I think my obsession with SWTOR, and especially Lana Beniko, might be unhealthy... but I can’t help it. I want to write that story, especially the romance. Maybe some smut :D.

Unrelated Obsession: Instagram Reels and YouTube Shorts. Really need to quit. 

Any pets:��Technically my sister’s. But two rabbits, whom she’s named Ludwig and Wolfgang. She loves classical music.

Do you have a crush on anyone: In the real world? Hmm, no one who knows I exist.

Favourite fictional character: I’m not very subtle about this lmfao.

The last place you traveled: Mumbai. I think it’s been ten months now. 

Extra info, not part of the original questions: I want to draw action poses. Like, the most gorgeous duels. Swords, spears, weapons, daggers, fists, chains. For a while, I thought I had to give up on that dream, but I’m getting my drawing back. Just a bit.

I also want to write my own novels.

Tagging: @captainderyn @kunstpause @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @crqstalite @swtorpadawan @chubbyooo @jemichi90 @greencrusader13 @naaklasolus @sheyshen

No pressure, guys!

[gen-ramc-2040]

Interview/question time >:]

(death mention for one [1] question!)

And here we go

Get to know: Ren Hamato

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cassie, hey, you said you have some questions for me?

What’s their ninpo like?

Oh, my ninpo? Uh. Wow. That’s a complicated one. Pops is still teaching me how to handle it. It’s something to do with my Naginata.

Preferred weapon?

My Naginata! It was a gift from my dad! It means a lot to me!

How would they react if family died?

Um. Cassie. Please don’t ask such questions. You haven’t been asking my siblings this, have you?

Who’s their best friend?

Rikki! We’ve been friends since we were younger! She’s the coolest Yokai I know! A wolpertinger! She has cool horns, cool wings, but they can’t really fly right now, Rikki said it might be to do with the fur on it her wings. But she can glide! And I bet in a year or two from now, She’ll be able to! Oh! Oh! And we watch animated shows together! Like- [this answer has been cut short due to Cassie not having enough storage on her phone to have an entire two hours worth of an answer]

Favourite food?

Eggs! Preferably with the shell! The crunch is so good!

Favourite show?

It’s probably something you haven’t heard of, it came out around when pops was my age. Amphibia! My favourite character is Sprig!

Favourite cliche?

That…

That everything will work out in the end.

Sorry about that, Cas, didn’t mean to be so depressing to end that.

Get to know: Antonio Hamato

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alright, you wanted to do an interview yeah?

Whats their ninpo like?:

My ninpo is friends!

[Cassie: Friends?]

Friends :3

Preferred weapon?:

I don't have a weapon... I mostly use my body like martial art. But I don't like fighting either, I prefer solving conflicts non violently ówò

How would they react if family died?:

.....

Is this some kind of fucking joke?

Who's their best friend (other than their siblings!):

Ahahahhahha...

Do-

Do cats count?

Favorite food?:

FISH!!

Favorite show?:

I have so many shows I like-

But if we're talking movies then puss in boots =} ! (The first and the second one)

Favorite cliche?:

Main protagonist who tries so very hard and in the end it seems like they're losing but they win! It alwasy make me so excited X3 especiallyif the writing is good!

Say hello to Chita Hamato!

What's your Ninpo like?

It's orange!

...okay?? Is that all?

Yeah.

Preferred weapons?

Don't have one, I like using my strength to my advantage! (I also can't use weapons with my claws and stuff -_-)

How would you react if your family died?

...can I not answer this question?

Who's your best friend? Other than your siblings of course!

Cassie! They are so cool :D

(Aww thanks :)

Favorite food?

Coffee cakes!! They are so good hehe

Favorite show?

Mmmm I can't think of any- actually, I really like adventure time!

Favorite Cliche?

I really like it when the bad guy isn't really 'bad' just kinda goofy :)

Get to know:

Murasaki Donatello Hamato

Whats their ninpo like?:

Very emotion driven, electric in nature and unpredictable (at least until they got the hang of controlling them)

Preferred weapon?:

Knives and bō staff, but they know how to use nunchaku, sais, and katanas/swords

How would they react if family died?:

Mura would lock themselves in their room and sob/have a mental breakdown at even the thought of losing a sibling

Mura relies on their siblings a ton so if any of them died they would breakdown then just shut down

Who's their best friend (other than their siblings!):

He doesn't have a name yet but he has long fluffy black hair, tan skin, freckles, brownish red eyes, and some mix of punk goth fashion (might also be a love interest 👀)

Favorite food?:

Grilled cheese, no argument here, it's a safe food for tech

Favorite show?:

Bluey

Favorite cliche?:

Mura surprisingly would love any romantic trope (except for a few) they've been dubbed the hopeless romantic of the family but more reserved about potential crushes cuz yk they're aro spec

(\\ and that's all folks!)

[ninety-pairs-of-socks]

WAIT FR THAT'S SO SWEET THANK YOU ｡⁠:ﾟ⁠(⁠;⁠´⁠∩⁠`⁠;⁠)ﾟ⁠:⁠｡ I'd love to hear your prediction reasons and details!! And I'm so happy that someone's genuinely excited about my project, I hope it won't disappoint :D

yw ^^ danganronpa is one of my favourite game series cause of how nicely it's written and its development is cool, so i tend to get a little carried away/excited when someone makes a fangame about a fandom---i will literally break my hands to draw this i don't even mind as for the predictions, i'll try to summarise it the best i can but i doubt it won't be wordy, also, i have bad english; okay here we go 1. there's no actual mastermind in the game, rather, the traitors are the ones positioned to function it for an unknown reason other than their popularity across rhythm heaven (and i didn't know who to pick) 2. karate joe survives cause---he's 55 man, and a god at martial arts i think he's practically considered a weapon at this point, mc adore survives cause she has---like- some detective energy, and she's swag, aka-chan survives cause come on dude at least one kid has to survive the game (shE'S ALSO SGRUNGLY IM SORRY I LOVE HER), and dj yellow survives cause i know if i positioned him as a victim/killer those dj school stans will come after me chapters 1 - 6 predictions (in a nutshell): ch1 - the motive is basically "kill someone or your loved ones die lmfao", and Nova took that to heart, having to guilt-trip the Paddler in order to kill them hhh (it's not a physically throttle case more like a "walk into a trap" case ch2 - Pop Singer unknowingly reveals herself as one of the traitors, Red Donpan tries to set up a murder plan in order to thwart the (non-existent) mastermind's plan, it ends up working, but she accidentally ends her own life in the process ch3 - As everyone else grows anxious, Girl and Munchy Monk form a truce and strive to protect everyone by forming some safety group as they venture to find whoever is responsible for the killing game; their plan almost works, and as the traitors were responsible for keeping the game running, one of them had to act fast before those two ruined it, forcing T.J. Snapper to murder the two ch4 - the Samurai and Crop Stomper get into a feud from the motive and yeah ch5 - let me just say reporter could be a GREAT final killer; as the last traitor remaining, she had no choice to kill someone, so she chose Forthington as a last resort; Forthington went along with the murder plan much quicker than expected when Reporter reasoned with him--but the true reason Reporter did this? she wanted the remaining participants to spread the n e w s. no longer did she want countless innocents to die, and ending the game meant the survivours would be able to inform other residents about the killing game so no one else could become a victim in another killing game and last but not least, ch6 - for Choir Kid, it's either a "curiousity killed the cat" case or immaturity which got them killed as the others tried to flee to the temporary exit evilly laughs in the most evil way ever

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #656

Top Ten Leonard Cohen Songs

Welcome to another edition of “I didn’t really have time to write anything this week so it’s going to be a really quick one”. Which is a bit of a shame, because I like going deep when I do these music lists.

I was quite old when I got into Leonard Cohen – well, in my late twenties, I guess. I think the first time I really knew who he was was after hearing Rufus Wainwright’s cover of Hallelujah on the Shrek soundtrack; yes, I am that basic. Then, a bit later on, he became one of the artists I liked listening to and discovering more of back when I was working in an office for CITV; I’m pretty sure I never managed to get one of his songs on air the way I did with everyone from Nick Cave to Tenacious D, but he was still an ongoing presence.

The older I get, the more I like sad songs. Well, not sad, exactly; melancholy. I don’t think Cohen really wrote sad songs. He wrote about sad experiences, but he always seemed to approach it with either a sense of whimsical, dry amusement, or else to seek the goodness in the bad. A tragic breakup is grist for the mill; the joy of loving exceeds the sorrow of parting. Towards the end of his life, his music took on even more of a philosophical bent, and his album You Want it Darker is full of songs by a man accepting his fate with a sombre, but not bitter, sense of reflection. Life is full of wonder; there is heavenly in the earthy.

He was also a supreme lyricist, and I’ve always been drawn to very lyrical, poetic songs. “He was reaching for the sky just to surrender” is an absolutely fantastic line that I think of almost daily; of a different bent but equally as good, “If you want another kind of lover, I’ll wear a mask for you,” is hilarious. But possibly my favourite line of his, from Anthem, is a very simple one: “There is a crack, a crack in everything / That’s how the light gets in.”

What I’m saying is, Leonard Cohen was very good, and here are my favourite of his songs.

Hallelujah (1984): yeah, okay, basic entry but what can I say? The lyricism, the imagery, the musicality, everything about this is so top-drawer. It’s almost a ballad, almost a lullaby, and the images are both beautiful and frightening. But it’s the themes – of love and despair, of divinity and grimy, mucky carnality – that resonate the strongest. Basically, it’s a song about how getting your rocks off is better than God, and we have to respect that.

Anthem (1992): there’s a beautiful melody attached to lyrics that are epic and almost apocalyptic; a story of wars and destruction, of corruption and despair, but elegantly and optimistically arranged. And the refrain: a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in. This juxtaposition is what I love about Cohen: beauty in darkness, light at the end of the tunnel.

The Stranger Song (1967): more in the earlier, folkier Cohen vein, this is one of his songs about crappy men making things crappy for women. But again it’s the lyrics that are so fantastically artful; the ongoing imagery of games of poker, the long lines building rhythm, the use of repetition, all combines in sublime fashion. It’s a darker song than it sounds like, sadder and more threatening, but no less beautiful for it.

You Want it Darker (2016): from early Cohen to this, the last album before his death. Almost accusatory in its lyrics, it once again references poker, references scenes of horror and death, and – indeed – is pretty dark. Cohen’s vocals, now a rattle of rusted metal, speak of age, wisdom, and a great weariness. You want it darker? Fine. Here’s death.

First We Take Manhattan (1988): I did a bit of reading on the background of this song, and he originally wrote it for someone else, who recorded a very different version. But Cohen’s version is darker, trippier, his use of synth feeling both of its time and also giving the lyrics – the sinister, threatening ravings of a supervillain, or the anguished wail of the disenfranchised – a deeply dark atmosphere, like an eighties horror film.

Chelsea Hotel #2 (1974): one of Cohen’s most famous songs, set in one of New York’s most famous hotels (namechecked as recently as this year by one Taylor Alison Swift), which features – among other rockstar trappings – Cohen receiving fellatio from a famous singer (not Taylor Alison Swift). It’s got a wry sense of humour (“You told me again you preferred handsome men / But for me you’d make an exception”) but also picks at the darkness of relationships, celebrity, and culture.

Closing Time (1992): yes, there’s darkness here – there’s darkness in, like, all his songs – but this is definitely one of the funnier ones. A sly interpretation of an Irish pub folk song, it manages to be a funny depiction of a bar full of old soaks, but also – somehow – pandemonium, or limbo, or some kind of biblical halfway-house. Is it about sex, or death, or both? Who cares when it’s this much fun?

A Thousand Kisses Deep (2001): a song structured like a poem, four-line stanzas of ABAB, again with imagery of gambling (“the odds are there to beat”) and warfare (“blessed our remnant fleet”), and once more dealing with dark, romantic thoughts. It’s the way all of these elements blend, the very evocative imagery of each verse, that coalesces into a song of slightly threatening beauty.

The Future (1992): although from roughly mid-way through his career, Cohen already sings this with a distinctive rattle in his voice. It’s a brutal song, an angry cry of horror as the narrator demands terrible things, creating an overriding atmosphere of oppression. Despite this, the tune is fast-paced and almost jaunty, giving the whole thing a surreal and excitingly malevolent air.

Leaving the Table (2016): another late-era Cohen; another one explicitly associated with death; and another one filled with poker metaphors. Is it a song of regret? Acceptance? Joy? Is the narrator talking to someone here, saying goodbye; or is it a hello to an old acquaintance he’s meeting on the other side? Like so much of Cohen’s work, there’s a delightful ambiguity; an the overriding theme is once more one of shoots of joy springing from the tundra of sadness. There’s a lot of shit out there. But it’s all okay in the end.

[rinnepegger]

hihi!! i saw one of your blogs and i really like it!! can i request a leo with an artist s/o? fem!reader if thats okay :) thank you ♡

Ofc! And tysm for requesting!! :D I don't typically write for knights but I'll make an exception this time bcs he's starting to grow on me and I can't help myself either LOL. Glad to hear you enjoy my blogposts! Hope you'll enjoy this one too :) sorry if this was a little short btw! TT

TW/CW: fluff, Fem!Reader, not proofread

Leo Tsukinaga with a Fem!S/O who's an artist

He absolutely ADORES your works! He loves the expression and emotions conveyed in your artworks, as simple or as complex as it may be. He just adores that fact that girlfriend is an artist too, just in another form!

He gets lost in your artworks at time and suddenly something would click in his head, and next thing you know, he's literally writing a song based off of your art.

Sometimes the two of you go on dates to cafes nearby, one to either draw or paint while the other just does his thing I low-key don't know what the fuck he's doing half of the time but whatever.

He's always encouraging you and supporting you. He is your biggest fan in the entire world. Sometimes you doubt your skills we all do dw and he just reassures and encourages you to keep going and to work harder to get where u want to be.

He loves your simple sketches of your favourite characters too, sometimes of him as well. you can visibly see sparkles in his eyes when he looks at your sketchbooks before he launches himself to hug you. Which afterward you find out that he saw your sketches of him doing daily things and that's literally it. He loves you and your work so so much.

He'll walk by and rest his chin on your shoulders to admire you doing your work, occasionally wrapping his arms around you as well.

Whenever you explain colouring processes and whatnot, he might not understand but he will for sure go along with it. He's amazed either way.

Not afraid to profess his love for your works out loud and in public. Openly talks about how skilled you are to his other unit mates or just anyone in general.

Love love LOVES showing your artwork and drawings off to other people, with your consent ofc!

If someone compliments your art, I feel like he'd say,

"YEAH THATS MY GIRLFRIEND, SHES THE ARTIST"

He will want to hang up your drawings all over the house, no matter how bad you might think it looks.

Buys you lots of drawing/colouring guidebooks, subscriptions for courses online. Basically provides you with any resource that you need even if you requested it or not.

Looks like a great deal? Shwoop his credit card and it's all yours, as long as you cuddle him afterward (✿^‿^)

[coralcatsea]

A: Your current OTP.

Arthur with either Gilbert or Alfred.

B: A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind.

PrUK, EngGer, RUKUS, Americano, AmeLiet, PruLiet. Feel free to ask me why!

C: A pairing you wish you shipped, but just can't.

I don't wish I shipped anything.

D: What was the first thing you ever contributed to a fandom?

Roleplaying, I think.

E: Have you added anything stupid/cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what?

I came up with the crack ship France x Yzma, drew a picture, and occasionally try to promote it for no reason.

F: What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom? What fandom was it?

I've been in Hetalia for ten years now. Never left.

G: What was your first fandom?

Tokyo Mew Mew, if only roleplaying it with my own friends I already knew in real life counts. If not, then Hetalia.

H: Do you prefer real-life TV shows or animated TV shows?

Animated.

I: Has Tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why?

No, but they certainly make some of my ships look bad.

J: Name a fandom you didn’t care/think about until you saw it all over Tumblr.

Good Omens.

K: How do you feel about the other people in your current fandom(s).

They're like people in any other fandom. Some fun, some frustrating.

L: Your favourite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for?

Art of my redesigned version of fem England. OR art of fem PrUK with my redesign of fem England and canon fem Prussia. OR art of fem USUK with my redesign of fem England and my redesign of fem America. I would be...😍🥺✨

Then, for fanfiction...PrUK or PrUKUS smut with England topping. 👌

M: A person who got you into a fandom and what fandom they pulled you in to.

My cousin got me into Hetalia.

N: Your favourite fandom (for the people; not the thing you fangirl over).

Hetalia. So many unique styles, so many AUs, so much creativity. It's not perfect, but no fandom is.

O: Choose a song at random, what ship does it remind you of?

[Insert random song] [insert OTP because I'll imagine them to anything]

P: Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas).

Disney Fairies/Hetalia crossover

Q: A ship you’ve abandoned and why.

Giripan because I never really found justification of chemistry. They make good friends, but I don't see many depictions of them as such, let alone lovers.

R: A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships.

There's always at least one person who also ships even my rarer ships, but the hardest to find content for is stuff like PrUKUS and PrUKmano.

S: What's a headcanon you have?

Arthur LOVES the ocean. Maybe an unpopular opinion, but I don't care. Dangerous or not, he finds it fascinating.

T: What are your favourite male/male ships or female/female ships?

USUK, PrUK, EngGer, Engmano.

I don't really have Hetalia female/female ships unless you count the same ships when they're all girls, which of course includes EngBela. But non-Hetalia? Raven Queen x Apple White has been growing on me. I kind of like Catradora and Scorptra, but I also have mixed feelings on them and feel they should probably get therapy first.

U: What are your favourite male/female ships?

EngBela, AmeBela, Link x Midna, Flynn x Rapunzel, Entrapdak...

V: Do you have any 3-way ships? If so, what?

PrUKUS, PrUKmano, PrUKGer, USUKBela, GerUKUS, AmeLietmano.

W: 5 favourite characters from 5 different fandoms.

- Groose from Skyward Sword

- Carmen and Devineaux from Carmen Sandiego (they're tied, okay)

- Shego from Kim Possible

- Eda from Owl House

- Entrapta, Catra, and Scorpia from SPoP (another tie)

X: 3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms.

Aaravos x Viren 😂

Saiki x Coffee Jelly

I kind of like InoTanZen or whatever it's called from Kimetsu no Yaiba.

Y: A fandom you’re in but have no ships from.

Attack on Titan.

Z: What's a ship that you want to ship publicly, but everyone on Tumblr hates it so you keep your mouth shut about it?

I sometimes feel like USUK has to be shared secretly in a dark alley since it's so **problematique** 😆

Antis really believe their perspective/interpretation of a relationship between fictional landmasses is the only one that exists. They're convinced it gives them a free pass to act morally superior and insult people just because they're mad it's getting attention. In the end, though, that says more about them than it does me, and I have nothing to be ashamed of so long as I act like a reasonable individual.

[caffeinated-cryptid]

ashes, ashes.

10.8k | AO3 link | tags/tws: intrulogical, serial killer/deity of death au, lots of death (murder, mentions of a previous suicide attempt, and brief descriptions of animal death), injury, violence, swearing, morally grey characters, crime.

““You’re not supposed to be able to see me.” Logan blurted out with a start, eyes wide and looking at Remus like he had just killed a guy in front of him. Oh wait-

“Mamma always told me I was special.” Remus replied with a woozy grin, leaving back against the cool bricks of the alleyway. Seeing things that weren’t there was a new level of fucked-up for his brain, but hopefully that was just a side effect of hitting his head and not something he’d have to take pills for later. Either way, at least this spectre was pretty to look at. Trauma had its benefits.

“You think a deity of death is pretty?” Logan asked wryly, cutting through the stream of subconscious babble he’d accidentally spilled into the frigid night air. “I’d be flattered, if that didn’t sound like such a red flag.””

(aka: remus chases death like it's his favourite pastime, since it means he gets to see logan again. understandably, logan has some objections to this.)

--------------

Case 1: the man in the alley.

The first time Remus and Logan met, it was more or less a complete accident.

As a part-time warehouse operative slash freelance artist, Remus had a lot of free time between jobs, and one of the things he enjoyed doing most while waiting for his next gig to come around was spray-painting obscene images into the side of alleys. 

His latest project was a 7-foot tall purple unicorn with generous proportions. Pretty tasteful by his standards, all things considered.

If nothing else, the piece of work would give passers-by a topic of conversation, and that was always something Remus aimed to inspire with his art. These topics, however, often happened to be the ‘why’ variety. Most commonly, the old classic (and his personal favourite): ‘why are you like this?’.

Regrettably, the evening passed pretty quickly with no curious pedestrians passing by his alley and starting up such a conversation. By the time Remus finished, it was past midnight and by now the only people around were the regular nightlife-- primarily the local college kids who had recently come home and were enjoying their break from classes, and adults like himself who were trying to chase away their loneliness with some other kind of high.

...Woo, and that’s enough depressing thoughts for tonight. Remus declared to himself. After all, he had a new piece to admire! Stepping back, he spent a moment taking in the completed artwork by the light of his phone’s torch before deciding it was as perfect as it could get. He’d come back later and get a picture during the daytime to show off to his friends, so for now he begun preparing to leave by packing his paint cans into his backpack.

It was when he had collected the last can of magenta from the ground that he felt something grab the back of his coat hood. Remus had no time to process the fact that someone had snuck into the alleyway before he was shoved against the same wall he'd painted his mural on, coming face-to-face with a hooded man waving a rather pathetic-looking pocket knife at him.

“Give me your money. Now.” The man demanded.

Remus blinked in delayed surprise. Usually he was the one being the creep in the alleyway. He had never expected to come across an actual creep. Heck, this situation felt like it was pulled straight out of an old PSA with how stereotypical it was.

“What?” He blurted out unthinkingly, because of that exact train of thought. 

“You heard me! I want you to get your wallet and hand over everything you’ve got.”

What an unfortunate victim this man has chosen.

“You think I have any money to my name? I’m practically the starving artist every parent warns their kid about becoming.” Remus said with a huff of amusement.

“Don’t try to bullshit me!” The hand clutching the front of his coat tugged him forward before violently slamming him back against the bricks. The back of Remus’ head ricochetted off them roughly with the sudden movement, and the small grin he had been wearing quickly faded with flash of pain and the realization he may actually be in trouble.

“I saw the paint you’ve got in your bag,” The man continued over his dawning concern. “Somebody who’s broke wouldn’t have all that.”

Remus’ thoughts halted for a second. His bag…! He knew the paint can he was holding onto for dear life wouldn’t do much in the way of self-defense given that it was practically empty, but a whole bag of them? Hitting this guy with that much weight would make him think twice about trying to stab him, at least.

“Okay, okay. You got me, I’m rich as hell. Just let me get it, alright? My wallet's in there.”

The man gave him a skeptical look, but stepped back slightly, continuing to hold the weapon in his direction. “I know how to throw knives. Try to run and you’ll have a hole in your back quicker than an onset stroke.”

Yikes, and Remus thought he was bad at metaphors. He didn’t even need Virgil here to tell him that that made no sense. Still, he grinned placatingly. “Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye: I won’t run.”

Finally, bad-metaphor guy let down his guard and allowed Remus to side-step around him. He walked a few paces towards where he dropped his backpack in his initial shock, putting the magenta spray in before he picked it up by the straps. True to his word, he didn't run; instead he swung around on his heel, slamming the full force of his hardback sketchbooks and cans of spray paint into the face of the hooded man.

He instantly dropped his knife, falling backwards and clutching his nose as blood erupted from it. Under the low-lighting of the street lamp, Remus was transfixed for a second, feeling like he was in one of those gritty r-rated movies he watched with his babysitter as a kid. The moment was ruined when he realized that 1) the man was approaching again very quickly, and 2) he couldn’t get the momentum quick enough to swing his bag around and hit him a second time.

Before he knew it, Remus had accidentally let go of the makeshift weapon when he was tackled to the ground, wind completely knocked out of him as the two of them collided against cobblestone moistened with rain.

“You fucking bastard.” The guy hissed furiously. His voice was nasally now that his nose was crooked and broken-looking, and Remus almost wanted to poke fun of him for it until he felt two hands wrap around his throat and start to choke him. “‘Could’ve just made things easy, but now you’re gonna die with all the other trash.”

Why? Remus wanted to ask. Over the 7 dollars and 15 cents he had?

But as he tried to tear away the vice grip on his neck, he couldn’t find the voice to talk back, even though the seriousness of the situation was hitting him like a freight train. Maybe it was his own fault for escalating things instead of playing along. Go figure, he had overestimated his own abilities after years being the off-putting one; the person others thought they had to watch over their shoulder for. Either that, or maybe it was the fact that his wallet carried more sentimental value with it than monetary. It was small and made of orange ducktape, but it carried so many things that Remus wanted to protect; a photo of his family, one of Virgil's guitar picks, the ticket to the last Tenacious D he went to, and of course, the receipt for his first condom purchase.

His mind flashed to his friends and family, and he wondered how they’d feel about this; him dying because of some dumb robber in a dumb alleyway because he was painting his dumb artwork. That was hardly the kind of death one could look back on and regard with pride (Hell if it wasn't funny to imagine how everyone will react to the news, though). But as he focused on the face above him, he realized with some panic that the grip wasn’t loosening, even as he could feel his lungs burn and a near-soothing feeling telling him to just let go.

As a final act of desperation to save himself from becoming a wholly embarrassing funeral eulogy instead of having a rockstar’s death in his 40s like he always imagined for himself, he patted the ground frantically, looking for a loose rock or something to stop this with. That’s when he felt it; the slightly warm plastic handle of the knife the guy had been holding. Remus’ heart pounded as he realized what he needed to do, and he barely even considered the repercussions of the action before he was plunging the knife into the side of the guy’s neck.

Finally, the grip around his throat loosened as the guy gasped, his expression flickering back and forth between anger and shock. Remus ripped the knife away, inhaling air greedily when the sudden action caused the man to loosen his grip and move off of him, trying to cover the stab wound with his hands and failing.

Remus quickly scrambled back and pulled himself up the wall, watching and waiting for the guy to fall still. He did, after what felt like a few minutes, and Remus didn’t know whether to cry or laugh. He’d just killed a man. It was self-defence, but still… even the morbid thoughts he had over the years couldn't have prepared him for what it would have actually felt like to go through with any of it.

In that moment of pause, his injuries caught up with him as both his head and neck begun to ache. He was so disoriented that he barely even noticed the third person standing in the alley until they spoke up.

“Well. I didn’t see that coming.”

Remus snapped his head towards the source of the voice, and immediately regretted it when the hasty motion made him dizzy. The only reason he didn’t immediately jump into fight mode was because of the unusually casual way the voice had spoken. Beyond that, the figure he saw standing a short distance away didn’t really… look like a regular person. Beyond the odd formal clothing that had no discernable modern style to it and the shock of white hair that could only be achieved with hella bleach, his skin was a cool grey like a cadaver and he had a ghostly appearance to him; transparent and misty around the edges.

Definitely not the sort of thing Remus expected to see, but he was always one to accommodate the unexpected. 

“...You and me both. My only goal for today was to draw unicorn porn.” Remus replied lightly, once he decided it wouldn't hurt to entertain whatever was currently happening.

The figure turned, startling at the sight of Remus staring directly at him.

“You’re not supposed to be able to see me.” He blurted out with wide eyes, looking at Remus like he had just killed a guy in front of him. Oh wait-

“Mamma always told me I was special.” Remus replied with a woozy grin, leaving back against the cool bricks of the alleyway. Seeing things that weren’t there was a new level of fucked-up for his brain, but hopefully that was just a side effect of hitting his head and not something he’d have to take pills for later. Either way, at least this spectre was pretty to look at. Trauma had its benefits.

“You think a deity of death is pretty?” The man (deity???) asked wryly, cutting through the stream of subconscious babble he’d accidentally spilled into the frigid night air. “I’d be flattered, if that didn’t sound like such a red flag.”

"I can't believe my own brain is kinkshaming me." Remus whined, slipping down slightly as the worn-down soles of his boots lost their grip on the concrete for a second. 

Death frowned, until a metaphorical lightbulb lit over his head. "Ah- you think you're hallucinating. Well, that's not an unfair assumption. Keep believing it, by all means."

"That doesn't sound like something a hallucination would say." Remus pointed out.

"Well then, I'll gladly prove my non-existence by disappearing." Death said as he took a step towards the body.

"Wait!" Remus called before he could figure out why. The ghostly figure stopped, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. Remus’ composure slipped as his eyes darted between the body and Death. "I...I need to know that this is real. That I'm not making this up. This feels like something I'd dream, but…" 

His hand clenched around the knife, feeling the squelch of blood and the tremor of his hand. Despite the mixed signals he was currently getting on the state of his sanity, it felt solid and real, and Remus wasn’t sure what to make of that.

"Fuck. Please tell me! Am I being as messed up as usual or did I really just kill someone?"

Death’s eyes softened. "You did. This is real." 

"Well shit. Okay…" Remus looked back at the body with a deep resignation. He wondered if he should do something about that. Probably not; that would look even more incriminating.

"...If it makes you feel better, he has hurt people in situations like this before, and completely unnecessarily; his only motive was to achieve a rush.” 

That did make Remus feel better, actually. 

"Good. I’m glad I killed a piece of shit and not someone down on their luck." Remus sighed, eyeing the spectral figure. "Speaking of, if this is real, then I guess that means you are too right?"

Any sympathy on Death's place quickly faded as he was caught out. "Erm-"

"It's cool." Remus leaned his head back again. "Talking to a cute ghost man? Sounds like a typical Thursday night for me."

Actually, this was the furthest thing from a typical Thursday night for Remus, but he didn’t want to admit that to the cute ghost man and risk looking uncool.

"You shouldn't get acquainted with it. Seeing me is hardly a good thing." Death replied, though his cheeks were distinctly a darker grey. 

"Aww- don't sell yourself short. I love your work!" Remus waved away vaguely. He always had a strange relationship with death in a way that others didn’t; always the first to laugh at a funeral or smile instead of grieve. That was probably why he felt so comfortable right now. “Besides, we’ll all be food for the dirt and worms eventually, anyway. Why get uncomfortable with it?"

Death met his eyes again, seeming slightly more firm. “Perish those thoughts, it's hardly your time yet."

Remus pouted. "It's still inevitable, though. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy I didn’t die today and got to meet you instead, but what’s so bad about something that’s going to happen either way?”

“I’m starting to think I was right by judging your attitude as a red flag.” Death muttered.

“But I'm right aren't I?” Remus prodded.

“Indeed.” Death begrudgingly conceded. “And do you know just how inevitable it is? Approximately 2 people die per second; 106 per minute. There have been 6435 events of armed conflict in the past year alone, and over 690 million people who are undernourished as we speak. Beyond that, there are even more people losing their lives to case-by-case natural events and incidents. So if you’d be so kind, do not be so eager to create more work for me.”

Remus absorbed that information, tilting his head. “Despite all that, you’re still here?”

“...I am.” Death agreed after a heavy pause, in the same manner most would admit their own defeat. “I’ll admit, I’m not used to… talking so much. It’s an unusual feeling, but it’s been pleasant, I suppose.”

“Death likes my company.” Remus laughed. “That’s gotta be saying something.”

Death rolled his eyes. “My name is Logan, not Death.” 

“Huh. I’m Remus.” Remus replied, a little baffled. He didn’t expect a deity to have such a normal name.

“Remus ‘Tsukio’ Kaneshiro, I already know of you. We’ve met before.”

Remus’ bafflement only grew. “We have? I think I’d remember meeting someone like you.”

“You wouldn't; you were unconscious. It was after you overdosed on cold medicine. Thankfully your parents got you to the hospital on time before I could do my job, but I remember it being a close call.” Logan looked at him knowingly.

“...Oh.” Remus laughed nervously. He definitely remembered that. Finding out you could overdose on a lot of common household items was pretty dangerous for him to learn as a teenager, and he’d never forget how furious his entire family was with him for being so reckless. He never knew how to tell them that it wasn’t quite the accident they assumed it to be (needless to say, his adolescent years were pretty shitty to him, being the outsider in this town in more ways than one). Thankfully, the taste of cold medicine had become too repulsive for him to try anything like that again.

“...I am glad you’re alright. It’s always unfortunate when a life ends too soon.”

“Well…thanks. This has been pretty trippy, so I’m glad I met you too, Logan.”

Logan hummed and looked towards the end on the alleyway. “By the way, you should think about leaving soon. There’s a group of people approaching us.”

Shit, Remus had almost forgotten that he had just committed a crime. Given how awful this scene looked, there was a big chance he’d get thrown into jail for this if he got caught. But at the same time, he was almost hesitant to leave behind the spectre that had enchanted his heart within a few minutes, even if his mind was still trying to catch up with the overload of information.

“Why would you help me?” He asked quickly and somewhat suspiciously.

Just as Logan finished his business with the body, he looked at him over his shoulder with an almost sly expression. “You seem interesting, Remus. I’d hate for you to lose your life over someone so unworthy of one.”

And with that, Logan disappeared like a cloud of fog. Remus stood there transfixed, until he remembered Logan’s warnings and snatched up his bag, shoving the knife into his pocket and dashing into the night.

--------------

Case 2: the man who couldn't leave well enough alone.

The next time Remus and Logan met, it was slightly less of an accident, but fuck if the guy didn’t deserve it.

When Remus got home after the night he first saw Logan, he was more grateful than ever that he lived in such a run-down part of town. There were barely any security cameras to look out for, let alone people who were willing to be out during the early hours of the morning. 

He was able to slip into his apartment complex unseen, avoiding his early-bird roommate long enough to wash away his crimes in the shower.

After that, he fell into his bed, completely unable to process everything that had just happened. So instead he fell asleep and left the deep thinking to his future self.

As expected, he needed plenty of time to collect his thoughts. First of all, he knew he hadn’t hallucinated the whole thing because after weeks and months of taking it as easy as possible, he hadn’t seen anything else as strange as a personification of death named Logan. Logan...what kind of name even was that? It felt like the name of a teacher, not something that should be as grim and macabre as Remus himself. 

But that was the other thing; Remus couldn’t get the thought of Logan out of his head. He was like the angel who had come down to bless him in a moment of weakness, saving him from further misfortune. He knew he had little to no chance of seeing their deity again, but that didn’t stop him from plaguing his mind constantly. 

Remus figured the best chance he’d probably get at seeing Logan again was to become involved with death once more. His mind immediately jumped to animals, the easiest targets; he pictured slipping into a farm late at night and slitting the throat of one of the sheep, going to a pet store and buying a hamster for the night before ‘accidentally’ leaving it in a box to suffocate, picking up a stray from the street and snapping its neck quickly. But just as soon as those thoughts came to him, he waved them away with a grimace. He wouldn’t be able to go through with any of that, even for Logan.

People had always talked about him like he was a serial killer in training. They would keep a wary eye when he picked up sharp objects and ask his brother if Remus had ever hurt one of their pets as kids, as if because he had unconventional ideas, he was a complete sadist towards the innocent. (And yes, perhaps he did have thoughts of that nature too, but they’d always fill him with sickness because he fucking loved the pet dogs they had as kids, damn it). In any case, he knew that going through with those ideas would only be proving those people right, that he was a dangerous individual who’d murder an innocent creature just for someone his brain maybe made up.

...Perhaps he was losing his mind after all. What was he doing, plotting out the best way to see Death? If anyone else could hear his thoughts, they’d think him half-mad or suicidal. It seemed like the best thing so do was to try to push this out of his mind, so eventually, that's what he did. He wasn’t so good at that usually; his mouth ran a mile a minute and the people who knew him would often say that his brain-mouth filter was non-existent. But this felt like something he’d like to keep for himself, especially when news of the murder made it onto the local news, presumed to be the outcome of ‘gang activity’ simply because the victim was successful and had a loving family and what else could explain this?

He decided to not think about making plans anymore, and he only thought about Logan when his mind was otherwise unoccupied. It stayed that way until the very next week when he found out about the situation with his roommate’s ex.

Remus didn’t have many people in the world who were willing to put up with him, but the one’s that did, he cherished dearly. So when Nadia, the woman he’d describe as belonging among the Valkyries (if only she could get past her deal of not wanting to hurt a fly), came to him looking uncharacteristically shaken and upset, Remus felt something in him snap.

She told Remus about how her ex-boyfriend was following her to her workplace and making threats on her life. He’d even begun showing up outside their apartment late at night in an attempt at intimidation, and that detail alone pissed him off considering he’d been too in his head to even notice.

“All because I decided I deserved better.” Nadia told him tearily. She was so strong usually, both physically and emotionally, so seeing her so close to crying felt like a punch to the gut. “I just want for him to be gone… But James would probably kill me before I could even file a restraining order.”

“What if he was gone?” Remus blurted out. “Hypothetically.”

Nadia blinked at him, wiping a stray tear. “Honestly? I think the world would be a better place. But that’s never going to happen.”

Remus nodded. “Right. Of course. Do you still have his number, by any chance?”

--

Remus’ plan was simple: Nadia would call her ex and ask him to come over to ‘reconcile’, and when he did, Remus would confront him. Scare him enough to stay away for good. He was pretty great at being intimidating when he wanted to that the both of them assumed it would work out.

Well, James came as planned. Their apartment complex had one massive security flaw in that anyone could get in without keys or permission, so the only clue Remus got that James was coming was the sound of footsteps bouncing off the walls of the stairwell. Remus stood upright and waited, until he saw the top of James’ head slowly ascending up the stairs, pausing on the second-top step.

“You’ve got to be shitting me.” James scoffed disbelievingly as Remus moved in front of him. “Did Nadia seriously send out the guard dog? What? Suddenly too afraid to talk for herself?”

Remus considered barking at him in response, but considering how James was way above the common creep in terms of persistence, he crossed his arms instead and glared steadily.

“Hell yeah she did. You should know why, given how much of a low-life asshole you’ve been acting all week. When are you going to give up the big guy act, huh? Curley called and he wants his complex back.”

James, in all of his 5-foot-no-thoughts glory, only squinted as the insult went over his head.

“...I knew I never fuckin’ liked you. Don’t get involved in our relationship, you little freak.” James tried to pass him, and Remus quickly blocked him, taking out the knife he’d stolen months ago.

“Take another step and this is going in your goddamn eye.” Remus raised his voice, confident that most of their neighbours were already out at work. “You’re not going near Nadia ever again, do you hear me?”

“Or what?! What’ll you do, Kaneshiro? Stab me? Put the toothpick away and step aside, for god’s sake. This is embarrassing, even for you.”

The two of them stood in a standstill, staring each other down as the echo from James’ exclamation faded out.

“...Fine.” Remus said finally. He slipped the knife back into his pocket, and James smirked smugly until Remus grabbed the front of his shirt instead. “It’ll be more fun to do this, anyway.”

With that he shoved James backwards, who quickly lost his footing and fell down the long and narrow flight of stairs. He tumbled for few moments, hitting each step, until he landed on the ground floor with a distant thump.

Remus stared after him, preparing for James to get up and start making a scene like he always did when he didn’t get his way. He didn’t.

Frowning, Remus descended the stairs, and as he drew closer to the slumped-over body, he noticed the puddle of blood around James’ head and the odd way he’d landed.

“Damn.” Remus commented under his breath. “Nadia’s going to kill me.”

He heard a sigh somewhere ahead of him, and fearing someone had walked in on his compromising position, Remus quickly glanced up, excuse at the ready.

“It was an accident-!” He exclaimed, before he realized it was Logan standing there, looking between James and Remus with a pinched expression.

“I know you pushed him, Remus. That’s not exactly what the law would define as an ‘accident’.”

For a second, Remus was starstruck (and opting to ignore the consequences of his actions). “You remember me.”

“Of course I do. I didn’t expect to see you again so soon, though.”

That almost sounded like an accusation, so Remus held his hands up defensively. “Hey, in my defence he was just asking to die. The dude's a dick!”

Logan sighed. “Regardless, you shouldn't go around killing people. Sooner or later you’ll get caught.”

“Well, I’m 1 for 1 so far! But if you’d rather me not get in trouble… Have any tips on how to cover this?” Remus joked, winking.

Logan frowned at him before he truly considered it, looking around at the scene thoughtfully. “...Double check to make sure you left no evidence. Move quickly, before anybody stumbles across the scene. And if you have time, plant something which will make this look more like an accident-- for instance, a spill on the stairs.”

Remus’ eyes widened. “I wasn’t expecting actual tips. Holy shit- okay.”

He went over to check the body, feeling his cheeks heat up. He absolutely should not be getting flustered over advice on how to cover up a murder, yet here he was.

“I feel like you shouldn’t be encouraging this.” Remus said jokingly as he smoothed out the creases on the front of James’ shirt. “Didn’t you say something about having more work to do? Who knows, you might be giving me a new hobby.”

Remus laughed. Logan didn’t. When he glanced up, the deity was frowning.

“Perhaps not. Forget what I said; I shouldn’t be interfering in matters like this. I shouldn’t even be appearing to you now.”

“Woah, woah, woah. What’s the matter? I thought you liked talking.” Remus hastily stood upright, furrowing his eyebrows.

“I- regardless of my personal feelings, I have a job to do. I can’t allow myself to become so partial over one human.” Logan replied, rubbing at the crease between his eyebrows.

“Why? What’s the worst that could happen?!” Remus argued.

“You could cheat death, for starters.”

“You already know how I feel about that.” Remus whined. “I’ll off myself when the time comes, if it’ll make you feel better.”

“Don’t-” Logan exclaimed, before he reigned himself back in. “Just. No. You’re supposed to go naturally. Neither you or I should interfere with that.” 

Remus frowned. He wasn’t so sure he liked the thought of such a boring death. If anything, he wanted to go out in a blaze of glory. Otherwise, he’d be just another body no one would remember-- like loverboy over there.

“That means no more meetings like this.” Logan continued on.

“But what if I want to see you again?” Remus muttered. He looked across the room to Logan and found him wearing a similar downtrodden expression, until it grew serious.

“You’ll just have to deal with that, because we were never supposed to meet in the first place. I have a duty to fulfil and you have a life to live. Our paths are as parallel as can be.”

“This is bullshit, Logan.” Remus said, but he didn’t argue any further. Not when Logan walked around him to complete his business. Not when he prepared to leave, either.

“Don’t do this again.” Logan said finally, giving him a stern glare. “I mean it.”

--------------

Case 3: the woman in the streets.

The next time Remus and Logan met, Logan was starting to think Remus was making a habit of this after all.

In Remus’ defence, he totally wasn’t.

Logan’s parting words just wouldn’t leave his head. It was even worse than last time; the knowledge that he could kill anyone and get to see Logan again plagued him, and he found himself pulling away from his family and friends after the questioning from the police was over and done with.

They were all worried for him, but especially Nadia who knew exactly what he did and assumed it was because of the guilt that he was becoming uncharacteristically withdrawn. Although she was shocked at how things had escalated, she tried to apologize multiple times for letting Remus confront James, which he would always blow off. It wasn’t killing James that had gotten to him, not at all; in fact he was glad that prick was out of their hair. Rather, he grappled with the idea of never seeing Logan again, one of the few people who truly saw the worst sides of him and accepted them nonetheless.

He didn’t deal with it well. 

The night of their next meeting, Remus was out drinking alone. It wasn’t something he was proud of, but he didn’t want to justify why he wanted to get absolutely wasted to his friends, so being sad and lonely for one night it was. 

He had stumbled out of the bar late at night, beginning his unsteady trek home since he had accidentally spent too much money and couldn’t afford an uber to drive him back. Stepping onto the street a couple blocks from his apartment, everything was quiet until the person ahead of him crossed the road, just as a car sped around the corner and knocked them over with an awful crunch.

Remus stood in shock. He looked after the swerving car to get the licence plate, but it was already too late and they had hit the gas upon noticing him. Swearing, he stumbled over to the person left in the road. 

“Shit- Are you alright? Of course not, you need an ambulance.” He was struggling to unlock his phone when he noticed how still the person-- a frail old woman-- was. It didn’t even look like she was taking breaths, though it was hard to tell through his swimming vision and the thick coat she was wearing.

With unsteady fingers, Remus pressed against the pulsepoint on her neck, and felt the moment her heartbeat stopped.

“Oh…”

And then he turned on his heel and threw up.

Death wasn’t supposed to bother him like this. He had always been proud of his ability to frighten others with his dismissive attitude towards life’s eventualities. But this was different. He had just watched the murder of a complete stranger right before his eyes, and there wasn't even anything he could do. What the fuck?

He didn’t even feel better when the person he’d been longing to see all night appeared right in front of him, arms crossed and ready to give a lecture.

“Again, Remus?! What did I tell you?! No more murder!” Logan threw his hands up at the sight of Remus next to the body, that was until he noticed the cause of death and Remus’ sickly appearance,

“I-I didn’t do anything this time, I swear. Logan I promised myself I wouldn’t.” He picked himself out of the gutter he had been puking into, trying to look at the deity, just so he could feel some sense of reassurance. “I thought I’d never see you again. ‘Thought I was okay with that, but I’m not. I missed you.”

Logan only stared at Remus when he began crying. He was a sappy emotional drunk when he got through the fun tipsy phase, sue him.

“...I apologize for yelling at you.” Logan said, awkwardly hovering his hand over Remus’ shoulder until it shuddered with a sob and accidentally brushed against him. Remus jolted at the cool touch, as did Logan, who quickly retreated his hand, eyes darting around worriedly.

“‘Always thought you’d be like mist.” Remus slurred, awestruck enough to forget his sadness. He reached forward to prod at Logan, who furrowed his eyebrows thoughtfully.

“I… Yes, that’s definitely strange.” Logan cleared his throat and straightened up. “In any case, you need to get off the street, report this incident, and go home. Being around so much death isn’t good for your mental health.”

“Maybe.” Remus sighed. “I quite like hanging around you, though.”

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re drunk. You’re going to feel a lot worse about seeing me in the morning, I promise.”

“I never feel bad about seeing you.” Remus said, picking up his phone from where he’d dropped it. “I only feel bad that it’ll be a long time before I get the chance to see you again.”

“...I don’t get it.” Logan replied softly after a heavy pause. “You shouldn’t want to see me at all. I’m a bad omen. You’d only ever get to meet me in times of tragedy.”

“‘Bad omen’... And I thought Emo was dramatic.” Remus chuckled weakly. “You’re not so bad, Lo. You guide people to the end. You care for them even when you have so many people to watch over. You’re opinionated and you’re easily curious when things don’t go to plan. You don’t mind when I’m weird and you’re fun to talk to. I like you.”

Logan blinked rapidly with surprise, clutching his chest. “I wish we could be having this conversation away from the recently deceased. But... I suppose I feel the same way. I still don’t know how or why you can see me, but our conversations haven’t been unpleasant.”

“Death likes my company.” Remus said, smiling softly to himself. “...You’re right though. I should probably phone this in. I just wish I could remember the licence plate… Something like XQ... ugh.”

“XQR 460.” Logan supplied helpfully. 

“That’s it!” Remus cheered, sloppily kissing Logan on the cheek. “Thanks babe!”

Logan floundered for a second as Remus begun calling an ambulance, struggling to regain composure. “I hope we don’t meet like this again soon. Three times over the span of a year is already too much.”

“I don’t know.” Remus looked at Logan slyly. “I’ve always had pretty bad luck.”

--------------

Case 4: the bad doctor.

The next time Remus and Logan meet, it’s completely coincidental and under less stressful circumstances for once.

Well, still stressful. Just for different reasons. 

Roman was in the hospital because of some dumb motorcycle crash he got into, which near-gave Remus a heart attack when he heard about because he may often ask for death these days, but not like this. Never like this.

Anyway, he was more or less alive in the end. Just a broken leg and a lot of scrapes and bruises since he always refused to wear the proper protective clothing when he went riding (due to it ‘not fitting his aesthetic', apparently. Remus assumed it was pussy talk for ‘I don’t look badass enough to pull off leather’).

Remus had stopped by to visit, bringing some of the fancy name-brand crackers Roman liked since he kept complaining about how stale and awful the hospital’s ones were, and to say hello to Virgil while xe was on shift. The three of them even managed to sit down while Virgil was on break and catch up, too. Roman and Virgil seemed glad Remus was doing a bit better after his downward spiral a couple of weeks ago, even if they didn’t mention it.

After a few hours spent catching up and teasing one another, he decided to leave Roman to get some rest. His plans for that evening were to take a load off and perhaps call for some takeout with Nadia. Honest to God, he didn’t plan on looking for any trouble.

But still, trouble found him when he noticed Logan walking the halls of the hospital, following a doctor to the elevator.

Remus double-taked. Though he shouldn’t really be surprised to see Logan here in a place with so much death, it was still odd witnessing the cloaked figure walk around normal people, none of them noticing his presence. 

Remus quickly jogged over. "Logan!" He hissed under his breath.

The deity startled (startled!) before turning to him, just like the doctor he was following. 

"Do you need something?" The doctor said, raising an eyebrow.

"Uhhhh, nope! Just… getting into the elevator." Remus replied, stepping in and standing next to Logan.

"Why must you have such awful timing?" Logan sighed stressfully as the elevator doors slid shut. Remus looked at him, unable to verbally reply with the doctor standing right next to them. Fortunately, his unspoken request to elaborate was picked up on.

"This doctor is going down go the morgue. I was here to see a patient that died under his care, and I noticed how death seemed to latch onto him. I got curious."

Sounds like a bad doctor, if even a deity of death was interested in him. Heh, that probably said a lot about Remus too. 

Logan elaborated for Remus’ misinterpreting amused expression. "Remus, he murders patients purposefully. You should not have gotten on this elevator."

...Oh. Remus looked past Logan to the doctor, who had noticed his glances.

"...Hm, aren't you supposed to be in your room? Broken leg, road burn, lacerations?" He questioned, eyes flicking down to where he assumed Remus must be injured.

"Nope! You’re thinking of my twin. I came to visit him today." Remus responded as chipper as he could manage, suddenly a lot more unnerved knowing that this apparently dangerous doctor knew about his brother.

"Ah! I see. I did wonder how you managed to grow a full moustache in a day." The man chuckled. "Twins… quite fascinating."

Uh oh spaghetti-os. "Yeah… people say we're like two unrelated people, we’re so different." Remus laughed dismissively. It didn't seem to bother the doctor. 

"Interesting… Say, a partner of mine is conducting a study on the differences in the individual psychologies of monozygotic twins. I'm sure it would please her to get more data, if you'd be interested in participating. There would be monetary compensation for your time, of course." 

"This is such an unethical form of recruitment. What kind of professional are you?" Logan argued in frustration. Remus almost burst into laughter on the spot from the bizarreness of the situation, but he somehow managed to turn it into an agreeable grin instead. 

"Sounds good, doc." Remus said. 

"What-?!" Logan exclaimed. Remus spared him a glance, hoping it would let him know he knew what he was doing. Logan didn't look placated in the slightest.

"Excellent! I'll pass the details onto your brother and we can arrange a meeting sometime this week.”

At that moment, the elevator stopped to let a few other people on. Remus took the opportunity to head out before they could reach the basement floor. 

“See you later!” He called to both the Doctor and Logan.

“REMUS!”

--------------

Case 4.5: the dead doctor.

The next time they meet, Remus fully expects it.

Roman asks him over text why he volunteered them for a study, and Remus makes some vague excuse like ‘sexy doctor’. Thankfully, he bought it.

Before the date sent to them by the doctor, Remus decided to do his own research first. To do so, he contacted Virgil and asked for details on the man. 

After copious amount of friendly jabs (like 'oooh Remus, I didn’t know tall, straight, and boring was your type'), Virgil told him his name and not much else, given that xe wasn't exactly close with the older staff member. That was fine; Remus used the information to find online profiles, where he found contact details and photos, where he found business accounts, where he found history.

After pulling a few more strings from people that owed him one, he managed to gain access to the vital records from the hospital. It didn’t take long to discover that Logan was right, there had been a spike in deaths since the doctor, a mister 'Stacey’, had begun working there. It was a mystery how no one had noticed the pattern honestly. Weren't doctors supposed to get their licences taken away after a certain number of incidents? As he begun looking through the files more closely however, he realized that the deaths were often chalked up to accidents; small things that could have been due to anything, from mistakes during operations, to the patients overdosing on their prescribed medication, to incidents days after they’ve been discharged.

As Remus closed his laptop, he begun feeling very glad he had impulsively accepted Stacey’s offer. 

--

The meeting ended up being scheduled for Friday evening, and by the time it rolled around, Remus was fully prepared and waiting outside of the agreed location. He dialled Roman’s number, looking out to the empty parking lot and familiarizing himself with the location.

After a few rings, Roman picked up, sounding slightly agitated. “Yes, Captain Dookey?”

Remus snickered at the old nickname-- it was practically a relic from when they played pirates as children. Perhaps Roman was feeling sentimental after his accident.

“Aye aye first mate. You should know that I’m not gonna make it to the study. I already called Dr. Stacy to let him know we’re cancelling for today, so you can stay home.”

“Really Remus? I just got ready.”

“Yeah well, you’re supposed to be resting anyway. Unless you want to drop a visit by yourself that is, but Virgil told me he’s straight, soooo...”

He heard a retching sound on the other end of the line.

“No thanks.” A sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, I guess.”

“Bye, ugly.”

“Later, Rat Bastard.”

“Rats are cute, that’s not an insult. Byeee~.” Remus quickly hung up, his grin quickly fading as he took in the apartment complex. 

It didn’t look like the sort of space that would house an office, but Stacey didn’t look like the type to break the Hippocratic oath either, so perhaps the world wasn’t as straight-forward as it seemed.

Slipping his phone away, Remus buzzed the number he’d been given, and it wasn’t long before the good doctor himself came down to answer the door personally.

“Remus.” Stacey almost looked surprised to see him. “Is your brother not coming?”

“Oh, no.” Remus waved a hand. “I just got off the phone with him and he told me he’s running late. He said to get started without him.”

He received a charming smile. “That works just fine. Come on in.”

Stacey led him up the stairs to his apartment, and the whole time Remus felt the weight of the kitchen knife in his pocket. When they got to the ‘office’ (which was really just a living room with minimal furnishing), he offered him a drink.

“No thanks, I’m good.” Remus said, looking around. “...Seems pretty empty in here for an office.”

“Ah… Yes, unfortunately my colleague is having renovations done in her usual space, so we’ll have to collect our data here. I hope that doesn’t bother you.”

A fair enough explanation on the surface, and one his brother would probably accept if he was here, but Remus wasn’t nearly as trusting as Roman was. Nor was he as ignorant to the true purpose of this meeting.

“I see… That makes sense. Or at least it would, if I didn’t already know all about your dirty little secrets.”

Stacey glanced up from where he’d been looking for a pen. “...Pardon?”

Remus smiled back; a grin with all teeth. “You have quite a few skeletons in your closet, doc. Even for a fine medical professional like yourself.”

The doctor very carefully didn’t react to that. "My apologies, do you have the right person? To the best of my knowledge we've only spoken once." 

"Yeah." Remus agreed. "And once is all it took. I found out about all those little accidents that follow you, doctor. Weird how many times your patients pass away from nicked veins and potassium chloride overdoses, hm?"

The only outward response Stacey gave was the clenching of his fists. Subtle, but Remus noticed it. "Be careful Mr. Kaneshiro, because that sounds an awfully lot like a baseless accusation. People sue for that, you know." 

"I don't doubt it. But you already know it's not so baseless, don't you? You know exactly what I’m talking about, which is why you invited us here to a shady apartment late at night, no colleague in sight."

"Remus what the hell do you think you're doing?!" A familiar voice chimed from behind him.

Remus startled out of his focus, whipping his head around. "Logan?" 

"Don't look at me, you ignoramus-! You met a serial killer alone after I told you to stay away?!"

"He knows my brother, I couldn't just-!"

Remus looked back at the doctor was closer now, looking down at him pitifully. "I see now. The talking to air, the erratic behaviour, the pushing your delusions onto others… you mustn't be well. It's alright, Mr. Kaneshiro, I could easily refer you to a mental health facility who will take care of you."

"Remus, you have to get out! Now!" 

"I know!" He wasn’t a complete idiot, damn it! But he needed to get Stacey to confess or-

"Ah, perfect! If you wait here, I’ll go and make a call." 

Remus stepped backwards, hand going to the knife in his pocket. He needed Stacey to confess, but if he didn’t-

Unfortunately, Stacey noticed his movement and quickly grabbed his left wrist, putting way too much pressure in his grip than was necessary. 

"Ah-ah. I told you to stay put, didn't I? Come now, don't be difficult. I'm only trying to get you the help you need."

If he didnt-

"Let go of him!" Logan demanded to the man who couldn't hear him. 

Stacey froze, feeling the cool touch of Death on his arm as Logan tried to pull him away, and at that moment Remus pulled his knife out and stabbed him in the chest; slipping the blade right between the ribs. 

Red pooled around the knife, staining his crisp white shirt vividly. Stacey stared at the knife, and dug his nails into Remus’ wrist. 

"Fucker." Remus yelped with pain, pulling the weapon back out. 

Finally, Stacey let go and stumbled back, hitting the wall and sliding down to the floor. His expression didn't recover from the shock from when Logan touched him; he didn't even try to apply pressure to the wound as he bled out. He just sat there until the light left his eyes, and the only sound left in the room was Remus’ laboured breathing.

"I… shouldn't have done that." Logan muttered, eyeing the limp body. 

"Done what? I'm the one that killed him. That was my backup plan all along." Remus replied numbly, looking at the scene he had caused. 

"I gave him the touch of Death, it's- it's an omen. I'm not supposed to use it ever."

"Gee, I'm flattered. I promise murder was always on my brain though." Remus said as he took the tape recorder out of his pocket. No need for this anymore. He wanted to get a clip of Stacey saying something incriminating so that he could defame him and ruin his reputation, but well, him not being able to benefit from a reputation at all was the next best thing.

Logan watched him, taking in the claw marks across his wrist. "...Right. He scratched you, so remember to clean under his nails." 

Despite everything, Remus smiled softly at the advice. "Aww, you really care about me, don't you?"

"I- no. Absolutely not. That’s absurd" Remus snickered as Logan flushed an adorable shade of paynes grey, which he hid by going to deal with the corrupt doctor’s soul. 

"...Why did you show up, by the way? There isn't anyone dead in this apartment is there?" Remus realized belatedly, looking around the empty space. 

"Ah… No. Admittedly, I've been keeping a closer eye on this town than I really should, and after what happened the other day, I figured I needed to be here when I noticed you two meeting… I probably shouldn’t have.” Logan conceded.

"Well, at least you can't say this wasn't a business visit." Remus giggled to himself, wiping the blood from his knife with a tissue. Maybe he was a little giddy from the endorphins of confronting a prolific serial killer, or perhaps it was the confirmation that Logan cared for him, but either way he felt really good right now, like he could take on the world.

Logan looked at him and sighed. "I should've known you'd be trouble. No more killing, Remus. This has to be the last time."

"Of course, pinky promise~."

"...I can see you crossing your fingers behind your back, you brat."

--------------

Case 5: the one who tried to get away.

The next time they met, Remus broke his pinky promise. No surprises there.

It was hardly even a promise to begin with, but for some reason Logan expected him to stick to it. Quite foolish, if you ask Remus, given that he now had a total of three murders under his belt, and stopping there almost felt like giving up. 

Of course, he had to lay low after Stacey however. The hospital was holding a memorial for his death and Remus later found out that it was ruled a break in. (Made sense, since Remus took a few of his fancy cleaning products on the way out, as a treat to himself.)

It was a shame Stacey was being remembered so honourably, but he couldn't really do anything about that. At least he wasn't out in the world hurting more people. 

But unfortunately for Remus, the ruling of Stacey’s murder didn’t stop the incident from trickling into his normal life, as Virgil and Roman seemed to grow suspicious of him. Virgil didn't bring up the topic to him directly, but xe begun acting sketchy when the two of them hung out (Though that could easily be wariness after having one of xyr co-workers be killed). Oppositely, Roman brought the topic up at the first chance possible.

"Dr. Stacey was murdered the night we were supposed to meet him." Roman commented the next day they were able to have lunch together, arms crossed confrontationally. "Funny that."

"Yeah. Sounds like we had some pretty good luck, if you ask me." Remus grinned.

"Wha- why are you smiling?! A man died!" His twin hissed at him. Under his breath, as to not alert the other tables.

Remus’ grin faded. "Listen Ro-bro, I didn't want to tell you this but our good doctor wasn't as kind as you think he is. I called you off that night to help you. Trust me. It’s better off that neither of us went through with that ‘study’."

Roman leaned back, looking unconvinced. "What were you doing instead, Remus?"

"...Huh?"

"You heard me. Where were you? What's your alibi?"

"You're not accusing your own flesh and blood of murder, are you?" Remus sipped his drink casually; ice coffee with as many pumps of peppermint syrup as the barista would allow. 

"Just answer the question." Siiigh, what a tightass. How did they come out the same womb? 

"I was meeting an old friend, for your information. Logan." Remus smiled to himself at the inside joke.

"Logan? You've never mentioned a Logan before." Roman raised his eyebrows.

Remus leaned back in his chair with a shrug, opting to look out the window instead. By doing so he missed the flash of complicated emotions that crossed his twin’s face at the dismissive gesture.

"I don't tell you everything about my life, brother dearest."

"Clearly…"

--

A week or two passed since his conversation with Roman, and during that time Remus didn't get to see Logan again once. That wasn't such a terrible thing, most people would assume, to not run into a deity of death, but Remus was so bored! He wanted to see his favourite death pal again, but no opportunities arose to do that, and nothing was striking his murder-fancy.

That was until the day he saw a familiar licence plate parked outside a shop.

Remus froze in his tracks, remembering the night he last saw that car.

A woman crossing the street, a body too still, a car speeding away with no remorse-

Remus had given the licence number to the police, but clearly they hadn't done anything about it. Or perhaps they'd tried and the asshole bought them off. 

He growled at the idea, startling a passer-by who was crossing around him.

Thankfully, he didn't have to wait long before he found out who his ire belonged to. A familiar face left the shops and begun walking towards the car; Anton, a guy who had been a year above him back in high school. Remus’ memory of the man was vague; primarily made up of snapshots of cruelty and entitlement towards those around him.

He looked exactly the same, with his annoyingly polished appearance and ugly overpriced clothes. So he was right about the police being paid off, then. Typical.

He'd just have to do something about this himself. 

--

“I suppose there’s no point in trying to convince you to stop this, is there?”

“I mean.” Remus begun, looking down at the body he had just finished suffocating and rubbing at his bruised arms. There was more of a struggle than tv had led him to believe. “I kinda had to do this one. What? Was I supposed to connect the dots on a murder and not stalk and kill the guy who got away unpunished?”

“Most people would say yes.” Logan groaned, in the sort of tone that said he already knew he was fighting a losing battle.

“We’re not like most people though, are we?” Remus grinned, fluttering his eyelashes.

“You’re most certainly not. I’m barely a person.” Logan replied with finality.

--------------

Case 6: the one who pushed their luck.

And then shortly after; 

“Come on man, don’t do this.” The masked person pleaded, hanging onto the fire-escape for dear life. Literally.

Remus raised an eyebrow, making a show of contemplating the request. “Hmm, I don’t know. You did try to pull a gun on me.”

“It wasn’t loaded, jackass!” 

Remus tutted and held his foot over the person’s clammy hands. They shook violently at the unspoken threat. “And now you’re gonna wake up the whole neighbourhood too? No consideration!”

His joking tone must have angered them, because they began struggling to hoist themself back up again, red in the face with strain. “I swear, when I get up  there-”

Promptly losing his interest in hearing the rest of that threat, Remus stood on their fingers, causing them to let go of the fire-escape and plummet to the street below with a strangled yell.

“Whoopsie daisy.”

He leaned over the banister, whistling innocently as a familiar presence appeared next to him. Logan joined him in peering down at the body, eyebrow raised.

“At least this one was merely an accident?” He guessed by the cause of death, a twinge of hope in his voice.

“Nah, they’ve tried breaking in at least 3 times this year. It was getting annoying.”

As Logan scolded him for his recklessness, Remus decided not to comment on it when their topic of conversation turned back towards the casual banter they usually shared. The two of them stood on the fire escape until the sun was on the edge of the horizon and Remus had to dash back to his apartment to avoid being seen by the early-commuters.

--------------

Case 8: the innocent.

And then: 

Remus curiously nudged the raccoon with the tip of his boot. He’d just stumbled upon it and it still looked fresh; given that he was standing by a busy road, it was no wonder what had happened.

He was making a mental note to come back and collect the bones at a later date, when Logan appeared in-front of him in a blink, looking completely unsurprised this time around.

Remus on the other hand startled before regaining his bearings and shooting the deity a smile. “Our paths are looking less parallel by the day huh, Psychopomp-ous?”

Logan raised his eyebrows appreciatively at the word play. “It appears so. It’s quite the pleasant surprise to find you not getting into trouble for once.”

“There’s always tomorrow.” Remus wiggled his eyebrows back. “That said, I really didn’t expect to see you. I was wondering for a while if you dealt with this kind of thing too, y’know.”

Logan looked down, seeming to really notice the raccoon for the first time. He nodded after a beat. ”She had a life too. My brother brought her into the world, and so I must escort her out.” 

”Yeah? Anything of note happen?” Remus asked, eyebrows raised with genuine curiosity. He’d file away the latter half of Logan’s statement for later prodding.

”...She had a family. They stayed together under the porch of an old couple.”

“Ah, to be a racoon living under a porch.” Remus lamented dreamily. “I’m glad she got to live such a rich and fulfilling life before becoming road kill. I’m truly jealous.”

“In the wild, your lifespan would most likely be around 2–3 years as a raccoon.” Logan pointed out, attempting to contradict his idealistic tone.

“Exactly. The life.”

That earned a pinched expression from Logan that made Remus titter.

“Just messing with you, prim reaper~. Now, do you have any idea how long it’s going to take for her to decompose? I have a new piece of decor to make.”

--------------

Case 11: the matchbox.

Remus watched from afar as the house on Psyche Avenue burned. It was bright and brilliant, so of course the firefighters were already on the scene, trying to calm the fire and save the occupant inside. 

They’d be much too late; the trafficker was already unconscious and likely burning to death, along with any evidence Remus might have left behind. It was the perfect crime.

Satisfied with today’s work, he took a drag of a cigarette, delighted when Logan appeared beside him instead of with the dirtbag who deserved to burn forever (and since it was a mystery whether he'd end up with such a fate, it only seemed fitting for Remus to play god and speed up the process.)

“Those kill, you know.” Logan said in greeting.

“That makes two of us.” Remus grinned sharply, even when Logan rolled his eyes and pinched out the end of his cigarette.

For the second time in a month, the two of them overlooked the sky together, illuminated by the amber blazes of the fire. It almost felt like a date.

--------------

Case 13: the one with bad luck.

He was back in the alley that had imprinted itself so clearly in his memory, knife buried in the chest of a would-be assailant. Remus was boredly watching the blood seep between the bricks when Logan finally appeared to deal with the body.

“You’re late!” Remus complained with a whine. “This guy’s practically cold already.”

“Apologies. There was a flash flood across the country, and it took more of my focus to handle than I would've liked."

Remus hummed. He thought he heard something about that on the news. Mother nature could be cruel indeed. Perhaps even worse than Remus himself. 

“Anyone nearby?” He checked.

“Not in a half-mile radius, no. However, the police may be on their way.” 

“Plenty of time, then.” Remus said as he pulled Logan down to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

It had been months since that first drunk sloppy kiss happened, and less time since it had become a regular greeting. Remus would never get tired of the feeling of cold skin against his lips. It was like kissing marble-- if marble had a sassy mouth and a sexy amount of knowledge.

Logan pulled back first, smudging away the trail of blood running from Remus' nostril. “Did you have any trouble?”

“Nah, you should see the other guy.”

That earned a laugh-- a quiet chime that made Remus’ heart flutter. “I see them. Good job, you’re getting rather skilled at that.”

“Why, thank you~.” Remus preened under the praise. “It only took a couple tries, but I think I finally got the technique down pat.”

“Hmm. Speaking of 'Pat', my brother doesn’t seem to like this much. He’s not unappreciative of your choices in target, although he appears to be rather disapproving on the amount of times I've been called to your side."

Logan didn't talk about his brother much: the deity of life. From what little Remus had learned from his prying and Logan’s own complaints, he seemed like a bit of a killjoy. He blew a raspberry in response.

"Tell Patton to stop making so many criminals and maybe I'll consider it." 

The corner of Logan's lips quirked up. "I don't think I will, as humorous as I'm sure that would be. It doesn't quite work like that."

Remus shrugged, watching as Logan looked off to the side.

"...It seems I’m needed elsewhere."

”You can’t stay? We barely got to talk.” Remus said with a pout.

“Unfortunately so.” Logan turned to the body; what he should have been there for. It wasn’t long before his focus was back on Remus, though. “That said... It’s a busy night. Perhaps we’ll meet again sooner than expected.”

Remus’ frown tipped back into a smile as he watched Logan vanish. He then turned on his heel and retrieved his knife before walking off into the night. If he was going to make good on Logan’s expectations, he better get to work.

--------------

Case 0: the one who death followed.

It soon became an established pattern; Remus would come across someone shady, and he’d put together a detailed- or straight-forward- plot on how to get rid of them. By now his city must have noticed the string of deaths, but with such a random means and very little evidence, Remus was free to continue as he pleased.

In a sense, he was untouchable with Logan by his side, pointing out anything he left behind and giving warning for any potential witnesses. Especially when he gave up on persuading Remus away from this path. It's not like the moral argument could be made anymore; the city had seen a drastic decrease in crime once Remus had taken out a lot of big players (even if there was an air of fear that lingered in the back of everyone's minds, wondering if they'd be next up on the chopping block).

All in all, it was enough to make Remus cocky; perhaps even enough so to lead to his downfall. But how was he ever going to give up now? All his life he’d been hoping for some sort of excitement to fulfil him, and he finally found it in a surprise meeting with a deity of death. Death had gone from a distant longing to something familiar and welcome; something he could use to right wrongs and feel a sense of purpose with.

And as long as he was able to exchange a life for one more meeting with his beloved partner in crime, he would do his best to stay ahead of the game. 

(No matter who was out there, trying to stop the two of them.)

-------------- 

Writing taglist: @just-perhaps @sashootkahoot @anxious-l0ser @illogical-immunity @overlad-of-the-snakes @varthandi @whisperinginthevoid @and-this-sword @creamiiteaa-xx

Deityfucker au taglist: @arodynamic-enby @its-the-usda-certified-trashman @overlad-of-the-snakes @aromanticwhore @haha-phrog @hetalianhufflepuff @emeryyleaf @winter-wandering @gaylotusthatexists @8bituin

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

heya, I would really like a match up if it's not a bother! :3

I'm a trans masc polyromantic asexual who uses he/him pronouns and is questioning his romantic orientation. The only thing I know about it for sure is that I'm demiromantic.

Anyway, I'm a pretty open, creative person or try to be, even though it's pretty hard with my social anxiety. When I overcome my fears and feel comfortable with friends, I'm very energetic and loud with a very stupid humour XD I also play an instrument (the flute lol), like to practice art, read and write things like storys or poems and play videogames! The most current video games that I play are stuff like Stardew Valley, Minecraft, Animal crossing and Sims 4, but if I would have the money I would definitely also play doom or similar. Flaws of mine are my huge insecurities and me being a people pleaser who always puts others needs over his. I also have the bad habit of bottling up my emotions due to past trauma and mental illness, what lead to me being so distanced of emotions that I feel uncomfortable near highly emotional people.

I would like an significant other to be at least somewhat understanding and being able to deal with my abandonment anxiety and constant need for reassurance, they also should be able to laugh with me over the stupidest shit and open to just enjoying the presence of each other while both do their own thing, especially when my social battery runs out. Things I hate in people are arrogance, ignorance and not willing to communicate properly because I think communication is the most important thing!

Okay, I'm sorry it got so long, I'm almost done I promise ;-;

Deal-breakers would be not being able to communicate, overstepping boundaries and purposefull triggering, anything else doesn't come to mind :)

Since I don't know what pet peeve means because I'm not a native English speaker, I'll just skip that question lol

I also never thought about my future, since mental health is kinda bad right now, so, uh, I guess alive and somewhat successful? xD

I. LOVE. BIRDS. I swear to god even as a child I obsessed over them and I love every single one of them. On a close second place are rats, I have two that are named Frisk and Chara (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧

My favourite food is ramen, especially if it's spicy! I live for spicy food and can barely enjoy a meal without it at least burning my tounge XD

I hope you can get somewhere with this vague description and I hope my English wasn't to bad, have a great evening/day :D

An akward german

Heya !

The choice was quite complicated! There's a lot of people you could have had : UT Sans, UT Papyrus, OT Sans or even Ink. But one got a better score with two more points and it's....

DISBELIEF PAPYRUS (Delta) !

He's also very creative, energetic and loud, despite being a little shy at first. He has bad social anxiety too due to past traumas and his entire relationship is based on communication. After what he lived with Sans, he has a need to know when something is wrong. Delta is a good listener too and his advices are usually very pertinent. He is highly empathic, sometimes emotional. He is kind, gentle, patient, and knows when he needs to shut up or give space to someone.

He's a very supportive boyfriend and loves culture. He doesn't like reading very much, but music is more his thing. He likes to give motivationnal tips to help you getting inspired, even if he can be a little playful if you're ignoring him for too long. He's a casual video games player, and matches your interests since he likes peaceful games where you can build things.

He always find the good words when you need reassurance or when you have insecurities. He tries his best to be here for you and he is happy when you're happy. He doesn't even ask anything in return, he thinks it's just a normal thing to do and he doesn't want to be a bother with his story.

He's not good with arrogant people either, so it's fine on this point. He can sometimes be ignorant, but he loves to learn new things and can get funnily really exciting about details. He's less close minded that the classic version on humor, and if you're really pushing him, he can let go really good puns too. He likes birds and spicy food, even if they are not his favorite, and he has things to make you discover too. However, he's really observant, and if you're really passionate about birds, he might surprise you with safaris and nice spots when you can watch them.

He's a nice peaceful guy and he will be happy to share some time with you!

[randomwords247]

1, 2, 5, 8, 11, 15, 16 for the art asks? :D

1) Answered Here!

2) least favorite drawing from this year

all of them

kidding kidding kidding uhhhh. thats a hard choice cuz theres a lot i Do Not Like

okay so i think

this is one of them because goodness gracious the frick is this its so bad, they all look so wooden and stiff, ew what is beakleys arm, ew ew its so bad

I also really do not like this one - its stiff, the proportions are tat and just. Ew I've always hated seeing it. Also frick this one my colour palette updated since B). Granted, I did it quickly, but still. Big ew from me I cringe everytime I see it when I'm going through my files

Also frick the rules I'm also going to put this here which is a frame from the mask animatic I did (which I wanna like. Remaster and continue ngl but shhhh), like what is this, its so bad, what the heck. Iirc it was at a point where I had to like line the inbetweens of some poses and you can literally see me giving up on drawing the legs. Like frick you past Random that was a hecking mistake

anyways ahem I could go on for hours roasting my own art so leTS MOVE ON-

5) favorite little detail in a drawing you did

okay listen i normally love putting in like little details but apparently this year either i have forgotten everything i have ever drawn or i just didnt do many so we're skipping past this question

8) underrated drawing you did

uhhhhhhh I'd say this which I was really proud of and even made a speedpaint of, but it only got like 7 notes (normally my artwork appears to get around like 30 at least), so I guess that??? Especially considering its one of my favourite pieces from this year oops-

11) artist(s) that influenced/inspired your art style

It's hard to pinpoint because usually I like will see an art style I love and slowly without even realising it I will absorb a little part of how they do it into my own. Though I'd say not so much an artist but just the Hilda Style has influenced my art the most this year, sprinkled in with a few @airborneice and @bananimationofficial (mostly in the last few months) and probably a couple more mcyt artists tbh cuz I watch a lot of animatics on youtube and they have definitely had their hand in morphing how I draw this year

15) any upcoming planned drawings

yes and no

Theres the next page of the comic (which i havent started because uni was kicking my butt and then has handed it to work), a quick speedpaint I'm working on that may or may not ever see the light of day, and some things with ocs that I have ideas for which again, may or may not ever see the light of day.

but also no because I am so hecking bad at planning usually I jump into things or have Idea and Lose It when i get to drawing. but ya i am definitely Going To Be Drawing in 2022 so Expect That whether you like it or not

[leejungchans]

juliet’s relationships with ateez.

they’re so beautiful i’m gonna fucking cryhdjhfjshsjs i’m going through it 💔

#HONGJOONG; (HONGLIET)

juliet is the self-proclaimed favourite child of hongjoong

she was very shy pre-debut and was scared of clashing with him, so they never fought

they became a lot closer when she asked hongjoong to help her with her rapping; she was always trained to be a vocalist so she thought her rapping needed work and (shyly) approached him asking for his advice

as they became more comfortable with each other, she learnt to honestly communicate her thoughts with him

makes sure hongjoong doesn’t overwork himself; brings him food, coffee, or just accompanies him silently when he’s working; will not hesitate to use her sad puppy eyes to convince him to go back to their dorm so he can get proper rest

she always looks on with a very proud smile when she hears hongjoong speaking in english; he picked up a little bit of her aussie accent too :>

actually doesn’t mind being a little shorter than him but she wears platform shoes a lot to tease him; he has jokingly threatened to throw them away

she is very worried about his scalp; but she loved his red and blue hair, and of course the famous mullet

with hongjoong especially it’s literally “juliet see, juliet do” :c

hongjoong dotes on juliet especially because she will always be a baby in his eyes; when they first met she was around 15, so he has always been really gentle with her; he looks after her extremely well

never lets her pay for anything despite her protests

she wants to treat him to stuff too :<

overall a very wholesome relationship

#SEONGHWA; (HWALIET)

another very, very wholesome relationship

he’s so, so gentle with her but will goof around with her too :(((

is the one who brings snacks, an extra jacket or blanket for her because she always forgets

when they first debuted, juliet would be very uneasy before public appearances because of the hate and comments she’d get; seonghwa was always there to calm her down and support her

when she was still in school he would nag her to do her homework hajshwjsj

she’s close with all the boys’ family but perhaps the closest with seonghwa’s and will sometimes visit his family with him during breaks!!

seonghwa is usually the first person juliet goes to if she’s having a bad day

she clings to him a lot, like, a lot; she will attach herself to his arm like a koala any chance she gets

sharing almost identical disgusted expressions

he always makes sure she’s eating; he gets sad if she doesn’t

late night talks with warm tea

each other’s #1 hype man; as much as she acts disgusted when seonghwa does aegyo or purposefully acts sexy, you can always hear her cheering him on in the background

that doesn’t mean she doesn’t tease him though

“excuse me, please put your tongue away” “mY hiPs aRe fLeXibLe” “sO hAwT” “wOw, AmAziNg” “...please stop”

#YUNHO; (JUNHO)

two babies

juliet lives to see yunho smile and it’s her life’s mission to make sure he stays happy forever

yunho always gives her piggyback rides

the height difference between these two is the funniest thing ever because she isn’t even that short but she always looks like a dwarf next to yunho

“uh...excuse me, you’re forgetting something :/” “huh? ohhh...[crouches down to match her height]” “thank you :D”

yunho brings out juliet’s happiest side effortlessly because it’s just impossible to be sad around him

that being said, yunho is her designated giant teddy bear whenever she’s sad

they always start dancing out of nowhere

you will hear her whooping and cheering very loudly in the background whenever yunho twerks and stuff

yunho’s fellow harry potter fan

he likes pinching her cheeks, patting her head and playing with her hair

but if he tries to use her head as an armrest she will kick him (out of love :3)

#YEOSANG; (SANGLIET)

someone save ateez from these two because they love roasting everyone

will not hesitate to roast each other as well

best friends who judge people together

when the others say or do something questionable, you can sometimes see yeosang and juliet exchange looks or hide their faces from secondhand embarrassment

little beans who get shy easily :(

she is yeosang’s biggest hype man; he could literally just be breathing and she will still go “wow, a living statue, absolutely breathtaking” “an angel sent to us from the heavens above” “yes, vocal king! yes, dance legend!”

they do everything in tiny :((((((((

they dance to the ponytail song together

she loves his birthmark so much and practically tells him that every day; she thinks it makes him even more beautiful and unique

he likes her cooking a lot so she always makes him food and lets him help out

“please don’t cut off your finger...” “do fingers grow back?” “i don’t know but i don’t want to find out from you.”

The™ best comedic duo but no one is ready to admit that yet

#SAN; (JUSAN)

juliet constantly judges san jokingly but she’s honestly just as chaotic

he once spun her ipad on his finger and almost dropped it; she didn’t speak to him for an hour

like hongjoong, san also picked up on her aussie accent a bit

juliet goes :OOOO every time san shows off his martial arts skills

if they’re not wreaking havoc together, then one of them is filming the other wreaking havoc alone while laughing hysterically behind the camera

she looks up to san so, so much; the way he improved his dancing tremendously through hard work and determination inspires her deeply

they learn other groups’ choreographies together

hypes the other up for everything

loves his voice so much; listens to him sing with heart eyes and vice versa

so, so clingy :((( they’re just tiny babies who need a lot of love and affection

juliet loves san so much and it breaks her heart knowing that he struggles with self-esteem like she does; they have a lot of deep talks where they talk for hours in the dark

#MINGI; (2MIN)

2Min!!!!!! 🥺

a giant and a baby

that only applies to their heights, though; because they’re both babies personality-wise

juliet is either being loud and dumb with him or she’s going “ahsjajsj please stop, we’re idols •_•”; there is no in between

she’d let mingi give her more piggyback rides but the first time he gave her one he almost dropped her

juliet never shuts up about how good mingi is at rapping and dancing; she’ll tell you that at least once a day

“anyways, mingi is such a good rapper and dancer. did i mention how phenomenal he is? because he is the best rapper and dancer :]”

whenever juliet sings/dances, mingi always looks on very proudly

“our main vocalist/dancer, everyone!”

her designated giant teddy bear number 2

like with hongjoong, she makes sure mingi is eating and sleeping because he works a lot too :(

it makes mingi really happy when she tries to rap his parts

juliet is the leader of the mingi protection squad, if you hurt him she’ll actually k word you in your sleep

#WOOYOUNG; (2YOUNG)

2Young; when they get paired up together for stuff, they introduce themselves with “2!” “Young!”

dear god, they are so loud

she’s either the first one shushing him or the others are telling both of them to shut up

wooyoung screams a lot so to juliet the only solution is to be even louder

siblings who annoy each other but also love the other to bits and will kill for each other

one time they did a v-live together and an atiny pointed out how when juliet says “no” it sounds like “noerrrrr”; wooyoung hasn’t let it go since and clowns her for it every chance he gets

one minute they’re bickering over something stupid and the next they’re cuddling on the sofa and laughing at random stuff on their phones

wooyoung teases her for literally everything, from her height to her australian accent; it’s a miracle she hasn’t killed him yet

“wooyoung dance king!”

she loves his vocals so much :(

she also loves his laugh; she thinks it’s very contagious and it always makes her laugh even harder

very clingy pt.2 :(((((

they like to cook together; despite juliet’s constant teasing, she genuinely loves his cooking

the biggest army’s

the duo that has everyone wrapped around their fingers

#JONGHO; (JONGLIET)

they’re the youngest ones so they’re bound to be chaotic together

they have a secret handshake!!

since they’re the only ones who don’t share a birth year with anyone in the group, they call themselves the “21st century duo”

another tom-and-jerry relationship but they love each other to bits i promise :’)

high note battles that make the others go •_•

their duets though :’)))) a blessing

when they sang miss a’s “good-bye baby” together at mama 2019

vocal legends

jongho always use the fact that she’s the youngest against her, especially when they’re asked to do aegyo

“i think the maknae should do it >:)” “jongHO SHUTUPJAGSJAJS”

“well, he’s the youngest among the boys, so i think he should go too”; cue his look of ultimate betrayal

imagine her face when she saw his red hair for the first time :(

“omgomgomg now you’re a real apple!!!” :(((((

more piggyback rides!!

okay, but juliet is honestly so grateful for jongho; they’re the closest in age so it’s always very easy for her to talk to him and she loves him a lot :’(

they understand each other very deeply and usually they don’t need to exchange words to know what the other is thinking/feeling

she can overthink a lot and in those moments he’s her voice of reason and is always there to help her through those times

partners in crime :>