#it's my GOAL to do them but yk sometimes i'm lacking in skill to make it happen....but holy hannah i've improved so much

[cherubofthenight]

i'm somewhat prepared for my 20s

here's what i learned:

- You gotta save yourself; no one's gonna do it for you. Everyone has their own life, so take charge of yours!

- Starting over? You can do that whenever you want—it's unlimited! And remember, your body can tell you when a relationship isn’t giving you what you need and deserve.

- Stay away from people who are too scared to live life. And those who make fun of or insult you as a "joke"? Yeah, it's never really a joke. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about your well-being and support you.

- People that don't have goals aren't for people who do.

- Are you your second option? No. So why would you be anyone else’s?

- Being single is a blessing, but if you do get into/are in a relationship make sure you have hobbies or hyper-fixation onto said person will most likely happen if it hasn't happened yet.

- Retinol at 25 is a must—it promotes collagen production and helps prevent fine lines and early signs of aging. And don’t forget sunscreen! Skin cancer is real—ask Hugh Jackman.

- Setting limits and boundaries is key to protect yourself in any relationship. Avoid oversharing, too! Think about the level of intimacy and trust with the person. If they seem disinterested or uncomfortable, that’s your cue to change the subject. Be clear about what topics you’re willing to discuss, and practice saying no when it comes to personal matters. Past experiences of oversharing can serve as good reminders to guard your privacy.

- Take care of your appearance. dress right, eat right, accessorize, etc.

- Get comfortable saying "no" without feeling guilty. Taking care of yourself should never feel like a chore; if it does, something's off.

- Never chase a man; that's just a waste of energy.

- Get your driver’s license and buy/start saving for a car like, now!

- Law of detachment. cultivating inner peace, focus on the present & and trusting yourself.

- Taking care of & bettering yourself should never feel like a chore

- Meditate—clearer mind means better decisions. Socialize and network; just get out of the house sometimes. But don’t be everywhere all the time. Your feelings matter, and only you know what you’ve been through.

- People come and go, and I like to see it as the universe teaching me lessons about the type of people I want in my life.

- Be particular with whom you share let into your space.

- Pleasing people will get you nowhere.

- Try new things, build new skills. sign up for freakin skillshare if you have to girl just DO SOMETHING.

- Sometimes you just gotta say "my future husband/wife/spouse would never" and move on.

- Vision boards. keep that future 'range rover pilates mom who works only when she wats to bc she and her spouse are STACKED' ver of yourself in your mind esp when you make life changing decisions.

- As the person living your life, you're the main character which means you should become someone that YOU love and stay true to them. you gotta be able to challenge yourself and then have faith that you can overcome and win always. you're probably still gonna care what people think, but your opinion of yourself should always matter the most. i don't wanna keep living by what i think someone is gonna think of me and then in 5-10 years im a bum who hasn't done shit for her self because she chose to live in fear yk.

- Perspective matters. always be the 'glass half-full' type of person. never focus on lack, celebrate whatever abundance you and practice gratitude. it helps so much in terms of focusing on and thus manifesting positivity in your life.

- Start taking care of your health now, your older self is gonna thank you.

- Knowledge is indeed power. stay curious, ask questions, do that research, read those books, watch those video essays.

- Take the time to get to know yourself—go out, stay in, try new things, and find out what you like and dislike. Avoid comparing yourself to others; you’re on your own separate journey.

- Financial literacy is essential. Learn to save, budget, and invest now; 30 year old you will be thanking you, once again miss range rover pilates mom.

- Not everyone is going to like you, and that's totally okay.

- Invest in your mental health; it’ll help you cope, make better decisions, and maintain healthy relationships while reducing burnout.

- It’s okay to be lazy sometimes! Everyone burns out, and that doesn’t make you less than anyone. Take your time and focus on yourself. Do things that bring you joy.

- Embrace mistakes; they’re essential for growth and give you more experience to handle adversity with confidence. Remember, everyone makes mistakes, so you’re never alone in that.

- You just got here! Calm down, breathe, chill, and relax. It’s okay not to have everything figured out right now. You’re going to find what’s meant for you—just enjoy the journey and have faith that everything will work out, no matter how hard things seem.

[pbjamas]

hey, i really like your writing! do you have any tips on writing in general?

awwWWW tysm <3 <3 <3 it makes me feel really good that you want to ask ME for writing tips omg

Ok: first thing, take these with a grain of salt: these are MY personal preferences and style. If you don't agree with them, that's totally fine. I just think, since you asked me, might as well give you the PB version <3 This being said, anyone who reads this post, pls don't come disagree with me i'm really not up to that atm lol

1. Write things you don't like.

Not like, hate things that you write! But more like......take a trope you dislike, and ask yourself: ok, but what would make me actually like it? then write that! This is what half of my fics are, tbh. Recently i wrote an amnesia fic, which i'm usually not a fan of bc it's like,,,,, aw, it's not the same character i know and love :/ kind of a thing. So I twisted the amnesia trope to be like.....what if dabi is still himself, just without his revenge mission? and I had a blast. And then my most recent fic was literally called "The Shovel Talk" which tbh is a trope that usually bothers me quite a bit bc it feels out of character and cliche, so i twisted it to how I like it—a little bit angsty.

It makes even things you don't like fun! and it makes them unique and gives it your own creative flavor. I like to think that I have pretty creative ideas, and I don't think I'd have nearly as much fun or come up with as good of ideas if I only stuck to my favorite tropes (torture, funerals, angst, Platonic Genfic Only).

2. Don't give your reader things they don't need.

Things are more interesting to me if they're not outright stated. And your reader is probably smart enough to pick up on them if you don't state them outright. They don't need you to! Leave some things for your reader to figure out! Kind of fits with "show, don't tell." Don't tell me your character is sad. Instead have her stare out the window and take a little too long to drag her eyes away when her sister talks to her, and maybe she sees her mouth move but can't bring herself to care about the noises coming out. idk. of course there's a place for metaphors and the like, but i think other things can be more effective in certain instances.

3. Meaning comes from the things that happen, not from phrasing.

Also very much personal preference and maybe not that popular but............I am a BIG BIG fan of Ernest Hemingway. He writes in plain, simple sentences and words but WOW he can still really make things very deep and impactful.

So. While it is very pretty to use lots of metaphors and say "sadness sank in her lungs like a low tide," overall the deeper message or the feeling the reader takes from your writing is probably going to be what happened, how the characters were impacted, or what the characters said. In my opinion, poetic and pretty and even memorable phrasing can distract from that. I, personally, write very conversationally, like how I talk. My favorite is when prose fades into the background to let the characters and themes shine.

4. Metacognition!

Think about your own thinking process. Or, in this case, think about your own writing. Going back and editing it, getting feedback, reading comments, rereading it—all of it's important. In my teaching and educational psychology courses it was always emphasized that students learn way more and more deeply through self-analysis and through feedback. Same for writers <3 Don't be too critical at first, go through your pieces and recognize all the spots you had fun at or that you really like. Heavens know I don't love rereading some of my stuff, but it's good sometimes!

5. Have fun (duh) and don't take yourself too seriously.

tbh i'm much more of a technical writer than a creative writer and i thought it was too late to get into creative writing (even fic which is like....so chill). I was too nervous to share anything super serious at first......so i wrote 2 crack fics and had an absolute blast. I thought, hey, if I know this is goofy and ridiculous, it doesn't matter if it sucks! Sometimes you gotta do that to get over your fear of not being good! And keep doing it!!!! I haven't stopped writing crack fic bc I have way too much fun with it, and I need a break from doing things that I care about and want to be good. Plus.... it's funny. Let yourself write shitposts. It heals the soul.