#it's literally one of those pacing & monologuing days

[skania]

OnK Chapter 158 Thoughts

This is literally me every time Akane shows up 😭

It was so cute to see Ruby so happy to see Akane! It feels like the two must have grown close again off-panel after this happened:

Akane looks so cute, too 😭

Onto the more pressing matters, first thing that caught my eye was that the concert took place in Miyazaki, aka the town where Goro & Sarina lived and died. According to Akane, she had "some business" there. This business is quite obviously not something she is keen to discuss, considering her reaction.

Could the business be keeping tabs on our resident psycho, the one and only Nino?

To be perfect honest, I'd also hope that "business" involves Akane doing some digging about Goro...

...But since I've gotten used to not having nice things in this manga, I'll just settle for Akane tailing Nino and keeping an eye on her, because that feels like the in-character thing for her to do.

So we could say that the beginning of the chapter establishes that Akane may be tailing Nino.

That's one thing to keep in mind.

Moving on, Akane says that she "might not be able to make it" to the Christmas concert. The very concert Kana will Graduate in. The one where Kana is expecting a reply from Aqua.

Akane (and her now patented ^^ smile) is vague enough that we can read it in various ways. Could it be that Akane doesn't quite want to watch the concert where she's expecting Kana and Aqua to get together? Or could it be that she has something more important to do that day?

And if she does, could that involve the 'Happy Ending' she and Aqua discussed two chapters ago?

That's another thing to keep in mind.

Speaking about Aqua, since Christmas in Japan is a holiday for couples, we get this very funny, very interesting panel from Ruby, who looks anything but supportive at the thought of Akane dating someone new lol

Looks like Ruby isn't too keen on Akane moving on from her precious brother. It's up in the air whether that's just Ruby being a brocon or because Akane still has her seal of approval to date him, though.

Akane really has this fake smile down to an art lmao

Next we get an Akane monologue where we're told that despite Kana being a force to be reckoned with, she can't match up to Ruby, who outshines her.

When I read those words, they automatically reminded me of Nino, who went through the same thing with Ai. Fittingly enough, we later get this Nino panel, where Memcho's face is obscured and only Ruby and Kana can be seen.

We also happen to get this ominous panel where Akane shows she's aware that there are people out there who want to "destroy" Ruby's sparkle. This is another thing to keep in mind.

I'm curious as to what Ruby was about to say when the scene cuts to Nino, but I won't speculate about it. Tsukuyomi's monologue was also interesting, in the sense that it tells us how Aqua's, Nino's and Kamiki's love for Ai has gotten all twisted.

Next thing we know, we get a timeskip. Aka has literally timeskipped us straight to Christmas, aka Kana's graduation concert.

The rushed pacing alone would've been hilarious if it weren't for what happens next.

Let's summarize everything Aka has established in the past few chapters up to now, shall we?

Aqua and Akane know that Nino is behind all the deaths in the manga. We have no idea how they realized this, but Aka took the time to show that they magically knew it. We're thus led to believe that this is important.

Akane wants to ensure everyone's future holds a happy ending, and Aqua is aware of this. Considering that both of them outright discuss Nino, we're led to assume that they may team up to make sure she's dealt with.

To this end, Akane may be, quite literally, tailing Nino.

Meanwhile, Ruby herself is being constantly watched by Miyako and Ichigo, to the point she says she doesn't have a single second of alone time.

Moreover, Akane pretty much summarizes in this chapter why Nino would target Ruby.

So I must ask:

Taking all of this into account, in what world does this make any sense at all?

The door even had a window! A window!

And even if it isn't see-through, we've been told over and over again that idols need to have keychains and security systems to protect themselves from crazy fans. Ai herself says so.

So in what world does it make sense for Ruby to get stabbed like that?? lol

Now, the stab in and of itself is anything but surprising. The manga hasn't exactly been subtle lately about Ruby likely becoming Nino's target. Some of us thought that Gotanda's line about Kana protecting Ruby was foreshadowing and that Kana would tank the stab for Ruby. Others thought that Kamiki would be the one to step in to save his daughter, one good deed to help atone for his past wrongs.

Whatever the case, despite our personal preferences and hopes for this manga, we all knew that Ruby was in danger and that someone would be getting stabbed. Some of us even expected it to happen this week because it's the week where Sayahime would be getting slashed in the manga lmao

So how am I supposed to believe that Aqua and Akane, who somehow even figured out Nino killed Yura and thus her motif, didn't take the necessary measures to not let it happen? lol

Even the lead up to it is... bland. Forced. Nonsensical. Why isn't Ruby shown curiously peeking at the door just like Ai would've done? Why don't we see her behaving normally at all before she opens the door?

The stab page is pretty much a copy-paste from Ai's, so why not go all the way and have a repeat of these panels, too?

This all could be explained by forced, bad writing — an Aka staple, certainly. And I wouldn't be surprised if that's the case. In fact all of this must sound silly coming from me, since I've been laughing about Aka's mess for weeks now. But biased as I am, I'm kind of forced to take the bad writing more seriously when my favorite character is directly impacted by it 😂

So I'd like to think that Akane and Aqua did see this coming and that they have a contingency plan. In fact, I'd even go as far as saying that I'd like to believe that the stab itself is staged. There are certainly enough weird things about it to make room for that possibility. The first thing I wondered about when the leaks dropped was if it could be someone pretending to be Ruby to trick Nino, and the lead-up to the stab does leave room for that possibility imo

Akane (or Aqua) with a wig, or even Ruby herself but aware of the plan — I would literally take anything at this point except the very empty, very forced scenario where Ruby truly just got stabbed because everything established in the previous chapters suddenly ceased to matter lol Heck, I'd even take Akane using a prop knife to give Ruby a scare and force Miyako & Ichigo to take measures to keep Ruby safe during the concert. Would it be silly? Absolutely. But this entire situation is already silly as it is, so I'll settle for the lesser evil lol

The story can't keep making Aqua & Akane ridiculously intelligent when it suits it, and normal when it doesn't. It's inconsistent and most of all, it's unnecessary. They could just as well have figured it out after the fact, alongside the reader, which would have drastically increased the emotional impact of the Nino reveal from: predictable and rushed to predictable but impactful.

If this was done so that Aqua and Akane can question themselves and their desire to shoulder the darkness to protect others, couldn't this be done in a better way? Because as it is, if everything is just as it seems, then Aka has deliberately kept Aqua and Akane from growing just so he can force them to do so through shock value alone.

I know I always say that I don't like predicting Aka, but I thought it'd be revealed that they had enlisted everyone's help to deliberately lure Nino into targeting Ruby during the Christmas concert, and that they would catch her red-handed before she could hurt Ruby. Since I figured that Aka may want someone to get stabbed anyway so that Aqua could put his medical knowledge to use, I thought that something would go wrong during the confrontation with Nino and that she would manage to hurt someone either way.

Maybe it was my mistake to expect any sort of consistency from Aka. Time and time again he shows that all he cares about is his perfect timing, and so characters will do whatever they have to do and will be kept as stagnant as they need to be in order for their development to happen only when that perfect timing has been reached. Like the way he rushed and rushed just so the stab could happen at the same time as the Saya slashing in the anime.

I do wonder though, aside from Ruby being immortalized as the ultimate idol through surviving the same attack Ai died from (and Kana's graduation happening at the Dome, because who wouldn't want B-Komachi at the Dome after this), what would be the point of this? Will Aqua magically get there in time so he can use his medic knowledge? Will Tsukuyomi perform a miracle? Or will we get a few chapters of people crying over Ruby's hospital bed while Nino keeps being crazy in the background?

No matter how I look at it, I feel like the only scenario where the writing is (somewhat) salvaged is the one where things aren't as they seem and this is all part of a plan we aren't privy to. Making Nino think that she has killed Ruby, only for Ruby to get on-stage brighter than ever would be a pretty cool twist.

If there is no twist though, then characters were made to look circumstantially dumb and incompetent just so Aka can have some last hurrah in the form of forced drama lol

So yeah, as per usual, I'll be hoping for the better option out of the two while preparing myself for the worst outcome.

Edit: I literally forgot KAMIKI lmao if not Aqua and Akane, KAMIKI should know that Nino is definitely going to go after Ruby. Why would he just sit on his butt and let it happen??

If there's no twist at all, this will seriously be an all-out character massacre 💀

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Hi love ❤️ I was wondering if you could do Dabi, Shigaraki, chrono and Kai with a S/O who who just grabs them and shoves their face in to her chest when they monologue. Like the S/O is just tired of their endless ranting so she does that to shut them up

*cracks fingers* I would love to-

Listen, you and Dabi rarely fights, so usually a argument is more like the kind of "Oh I like cheese" while the other is staring at you in disgust with a "You are mentally ill."

Really. That's it.

Is actually pretty funny, but now? You were almost throwing a chair at the mktherfucker since he was mocking you about not winning a bet you both made over a movie.

"Another loss doll, what a shame." He muttered, resting his smug face on his hands as he leaned on the kitchen counter as you deadpanned at him.

"Yeah yeah you won, now leave me alone." You hissed.

"Nah. I just need to see your expression at losing again. I can't even remember the count now, do you? I think I won on our lil discussions about of... 100 times already?" He made a false thinking expression as you threw a towel at him...

He obviously dodged with a cackle.

"SHUT UP!"

"I'm just speaking the truth here." He spat with a snort.

You had enough and just went to where he was. Thankfully he was sitting down so it would be more easy.

"Oh. Someone wants a round 2?" He smirked devilish before his eyes went wide open when your hands just grabbed the back of his neck and pulled his face right into your tatas.

Well... that was unexpected but surely not unwelcome.

"You're done?" You grumbled with a smile on your face as you nuzzle on his tainted hair before you felt a pair of rough hands squeezing your waist and surely felt a warmth emitting from his face.

"Yeah. I'm shutting up now." The vibrations of his rough voice made you ticklish.

He wouldn't. If you do this every time he will never shut his mouth.

Probably was complaining about heroes or a game he didn't won or smth.

And you were just like "hey chill os not the end of world."

Okay, not LITERALLY because if you say that it will surely cause trouble between you two.

But you got it.

I will go with the second option since I kinda feel bad for him considering the recents events (both manga and anime)

"Tomu is okay."

"No its not." He growled, fingers already at work on scratching his neck "Didn't you see it? That guy obviously cheated. Probably is a momma or daddy boy and got those cheats on games paying billions for it."

"Huh?" You let out. Sometimes in the middle of his angry ramblings you couldn't understand or just the dots didn't connected.

But something you didn't want was for this man to mess up his skin more than it was. His neck was a victim of abuse from his nails already.

You got up in the kindle of his rambling and gently started to caress the oily hair he had before sucefully hushing him and bringing him to a hug with his face other between your chest.

The rambling immediately stopped as his hands started to tremble and for a moment you were afraid you did something to piss him off even more when he just straight up pushed himself away abruptly.

But the sign his face was now a deep shade of red that matched his ruby eyes immediately melted your worry away as you muffled your giggle with your hand.

"Sorry, that got you out of guard tomu?"

He glared up at you before standing up from his chair before just burning his face on your neck, not touching you with his hands still.

He can't even remember why he was so mad about.

Look how effective your love was!

ALL HE KNOWS IS COMPLAIN I SWEAR TO GOD-

Sorry, this man drives me crazy

Anyway-

Surely was bitching about heroes and diseases and how they shouldn't exist/need a cure after bumling with one of them on his walk.

And normally you would sit and listen with pleasure since you were basically the only one Chisaki was open with absolutely everything.

But today was not your day.

You were just staring at him pacing around the room while you were sat on the bed just wanting to go to sleep.

It was a bold and dangerous move considering that normally you warn Chisaki or he just sees so he can prepare himself.

But nope. You just got up and pulled him abruptly to a hug with his face right on your minimum covered chest.

"Please Kai just go to bed... " You sighed while trying to carres the back of his skull.

Only later realizing the fair uncomfortable position he might been.

Chisaki was a bit taller than you... and the angle he was now made him arch his back rather... awkwardly.

You were about to pull away until his gloved hands grabbed the back of your night shirt as he exhaled shakily on you.

Oh...

Guess you guys found a coping mechanism for when he gets nervous.

He doesn't complain. He is an angel.

But he does go a rambling sometimes.

We saw that before he got attacked by a majority he was on ramble about to just kill aizawa.

Okay, maybe not a angel-

I totally can see Kurono as one of those dorky guys that goes mumbling without a care about something he enjoys it a lot.

And got shut out many times when he was a kid due to this habit (many times was Chisaki that ass-)

So he just tends to try to control it

Keyword try.

Because he is so comfortable around you that he can't just out of no where stop.

You're just watching him with a dreamy sigh as he explained in each detail about his favorite gun until he noticed your lack of response.

"Ha.. sorry about that." He scratched his cheek lightly

You weren't having that.

This man was so FLUSTERED when you scorched over and pulled him to nuzzle on your chest on the bed.

Face was 50 shades of red.

"Don't apologize for that. You like those things and I love hearing you talk. Please keep going."

I swear this man had heart eyes when staring up at you from his chest before he resumed his explanations but far more at ease at the position

Might have popped a boner

[markantonys]

Was talking with a moot and they were saying how they don't feel like the show is doing a good job of explaining the lore. How right now we don't know what being the Dragon actually means, what ta'veren are, what the Dark One even is, what does he want, why does the Dragon fight him, how all of these mythologies are built into the worldbuilding in the books but aren't as clear in the show/feels disconnected. Idk I feel like the show is just introducing these things at a slower pace than the books did and that's not necessarily a bad thing

i just don't get these arguments because most of these lore points literally have been explained in the show???? do these book fans just miss it when lore is incorporated via natural dialogue or via Showing Not Telling instead of via somebody sitting us down to do an infodumping monologue for 5 minutes? i swear to god so many readers just don't pay attention to the show and then whine that it's missing stuff it did in fact include.

dragon stuff: this has been abundantly explained in both seasons, meanwhile in the books the concept of TDR wasn't even introduced until book 2. we will get more specifics at the same time rand does in upcoming seasons, just like in the books. at this early stage we don't need to know any more than "the dragon is a chosen one figure whose purpose is to fight the dark one and lead the last battle."

what the dark one is: a bad guy (duh) but otherwise left intentionally vague to build up mystery, just like the books did. we don't have the slightest conception of what TDO actually is until his first onscreen "appearance" in book SIX.

what does he want: to break the wheel and end existence. ishy's literal entire season 2 storyline was about this, and it went into way more detail than books 1-3 did. i'm not sure we got much of this stuff in the books until moridin came on the scene.

ta'veren is the only one i'd agree the show hasn't gone into much (though it DID explain the concept in 1x08), but, again, do we need to know that much about it right now? we know that our EF5 are Special, and that's enough if you ask me.

(i also wonder if the show might go a bit lighter on ta'veren than the books. idk, some of the stronger Main Character Energy stuff like plot armor and convenient coincidences and people blurting out secrets around them might come off a bit silly, and as for the stuff relating to the pattern controlling ta'veren's paths, it's interesting but it's pretty deep lore and the story doesn't really change whether or not we're explicitly aware that the events that happen to our gang are predestined. like, we'll obviously get plenty of predestination stuff with rand's dragon prophecies and min's viewings and likely the finn, so how necessary is it to also go into great detail on ta'veren predestination?)

having watched both seasons with my show-only non-fantasy-literate mom, i can attest that there is SO MUCH information for newcomers to wrap their heads around and i think her brain would have exploded if these seasons had tried to squeeze in any more than they did. she made me take down notes she could review between episodes! you should've seen her poor eyes glazing over at all the lore & worldbuilding stuff getting thrown at her in 2x05! this also goes for stuff like the whining about the show not yet using the words saidar & saidin - if they'd been throwing those around constantly since day 1, my mom would've had no fucking clue what they were talking about because she really struggles with remembering fantasy jargon, whereas consistently referring to it as "the male/female half of the source" in these early seasons is way more intuitive and way more effective at teaching her how this magic system works.

at the end of the day, the show simply is not ever going to flesh out the lore and mythology as deeply as the books do due to limitations of this different medium, and people need to accept that. it will explain as much lore as is necessary to understand the story and not much more than that, and that's absolutely fine. show-onlys are understanding the story just fine with the information the show is choosing to include, and lore nerds can knock themselves out rereading the books anytime they want.

[johnslittlespoon]

So, I've reread TAS about 6 times, maybe. With every read through, the story somehow gets better. Anyway, I gotta know: when Gale chooses the horror movie before their first kiss, did he do it with the intention of scaring John into his arms? I remember that cliché from media growing up. The guy choosing the scary movie so that he can wrap his arms around the pretty girl.

You write Gale really well, and he's doing the whole "we're taking this at your pace" thing. So I want to know if the scary movie was a calculated decision.

Also, thank you SO MUCH for writing this story; it is my current obsession.

okay gonna get into some TAS gale pov asks bc i have a few >:) but SIX TIMES???? i will literally never ever be able to wrap my head around anyone rereading my stuff, it’s so mind boggling and it makes me a little (a lot) teary wtf :’)) <33 that’s actually insane LMAO thank u this is so so sweet 😭💗 ok buckle in bc i had a lot to say oops

tbh i definitely had that cliche in mind while writing it, like as soon as i decided they’d be watching a horror movie, i knew they’d have the cliche ‘hold me i’m scared’ moment, because it would be a good way to ease into the first kiss. however i don’t think it was fully intentional on gale’s end, because really, i think gale would’ve been happy to sit through like a three hour documentary if that’s what john had wanted lol.

so i don’t think he was swaying john one way or another, but he definitely had zero complaints about having an excuse to hold john when he got scared ;) and obv at that point, gale’s not dumb (and john is not subtle lmfao), so gale was probably 99.9% certain john had feelings for him, and he was giving john every opportunity to do something about that, since gale was so stubborn about giving john space to figure things out for himself and make the first move. :)

another rereader i cryyyy <333 thank you, would also run thru a brick wall for u 😭💖 YES gale’s pov very much interests me, i’ve got a whole section for it in what i call my TAS masterdoc lmfaoo. i have a stupid amount of oneshot ideas now in his/other character’s povs that i’d love to get to at some point!

but also hey ouch thanks for hurting my heart <3 😭 i do feel like there were probably a few “oh no” moments for gale after meeting john, like the classic ‘i’m fucked’ realizations, and i think seeing him smile properly for the first time would be one of those. john’s so caught up in his own head half the time that he probably didn’t notice the way gale stopped breathing the first time he was on the receiving end of his sunshine smile :’)

i genuinely think gale’s internal monologue during that moment would just be ‘fuckfuckfuckfuck’ because really, what else can he do but fall head over heels? i’m sooo excited to dig into gale’s pov eventually, to get into how much he wrestled with himself and how he’d told himself never again after losing johnny, and then in walks this gangly, sweet, loud–mouthed college kid, and gale’s never been so happy to have his life turned upside down.

(john and gale actually do have a little bit of a conversation about this in ch11 because i couldn’t resist, but until that’s up, i leave you with the assurance that gale was smitten from day one and just trying to repress it for a multitude of reasons, but then the incident happened where gale saved him from the blind date, and it was all over from that moment on. the urge to protect john and to keep a smile on his face hasn’t left gale since that moment <3)

LOLL. definitely an admonishing “gaaaaale” moment. 

i’ve had so many questions in AO3 comments asking if i’ll write gale’s pov of the conversation he has with marge, and i 100% want to, it’s the first gale pov oneshot (aside from the smut i posted lol) i’m planning on writing for this fic. i’ll try to answer some of those other questions here just to keep them in one place:

i think marge definitely had her suspicions about gale’s feelings for john — she knows gale too well to not know when something’s up, but she also knows that gale comes to her about things on his own time, that she just has to be patient, it’s how he’s always been since they were kids. but there’s no way she wasn’t squinting at gale when she found out john had spent the weekend (multiple times) at his house.

the first time is one thing, because when gale explains that john had gotten wayyy too drunk and seemingly had some situation he didn’t want to go home to, she’d understand gale letting him crash at his. she sees how gale is with john at the beach after that, and it probably gets the wheels turning in her head, but she also knows gale to have a big heart and to be prone to taking strays in, so it could just be written off.

when she finds out that john’s been staying at gale’s every weekend after the incident with his mom, at the very least she had to have asked him who takes the couch just to watch gale squirm, which then confirmed her suspicions lol. after that it’s only a matter of time before gale spills it all to her, and her reaction will eventually be detailed in one of those gale pov oneshots :-) 

[reyreadersblog]

TIME FOR AUGUST READING WRAP UP (PART 1.)

Well summer ended like a week ago, so here is all the books i've read and my reviews of them.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐

Never lie was the first book i read at the start of August and it was very easy quick and twisty read. Finshed it in a day, the dual POV was really fun and it added more tension to it.

However the plot twist was very unexpected, and that's not the reason i disliked it, the reason is that it didn't really make sense. I mean her whole monologue was lie...

Overall i did like the book, i'd say if you want something fast paced read it, but it was kind of a dissapointment tbh.

Raiting:⭐⭐⭐⭐.5

I LOVED THIS BOOK! It was so good! (Gave me major tig vibes)

I love any book that involves a kind of treasure hunt, and this book had added stakes with an inheritance hidden somewhere in the town. It was entertaining and very dramatic, although I wouldn't necessarily say that it was suspenseful, because it felt very over the top at lot of the time, so I wasn't exactly concerned with the characters' safety, if that makes sense. However, it is fast-paced and twisty, and I was excited to find out what was going to happen in the end. It had found family trope which i ADORE! It was so cute and fun to read about the team and what they went through in order to get the treasure. I also loved how many LGBTQ+ character were in the book.

The grieving part was done very realisticly, as someone who is going through grief rn, i fully realate to Lily.

This book was an example of how someone can take an inspiration from another author's work without fully coping them...*cough* Lauren Roberts *cough*

Raiting: ⭐

I love you Lynn Painter BUT WHAT WAS THIS😭😭😭

The main character was unlikable and obnoxious. She was not like other girls, she was just ✨quirky✨ and ✨different✨

The mmc was SUPERRR boring, liks his character revolved around being hot and rich, literally nothing more.

What did i like about this book? NOTHING.

Raiting:⭐.5

I can't tell you one thing that i liked about this book, tbh i read it because someone said it was about a heist and a game...and i'm all for that (the hunger games habit i can't get rid off😔) but oh well...it was not good.

More telling, less showing. The fmc always talked nonsense, i couldn't understand half of what she was saying.

I get that romance wasn't the main focus but it was...so dry, so boring...it felt like she saw someone with the same skin colour as her and ✨immediatly fell in love✨ and i'm not saying any hate or something, i'm a poc but it was done so poorly and unrealisticly.

Uhmm the plotholes???

The characters were just too insufferable for my liking.

I didn't feel connected to any of them.

The authour kepr describing every single detail like it depended on her dear life.

I wanted to dnf so bad but for some reason i kept believing it would get better...it did not.

THE ENDING WAS SO DRY?

Raiting: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

The book was very disturbing but so so good!

Long story short it's about Ellery and Ezra are the Corocan twins, siblings that live every day hoping that their addict single mom Sadie Corocan comes home every night.

Usually she does.

But one night, Sadie crashes into a jewelry store while drunk and high. She's sent to rehab while the twins are sent to live with their maternal grandmother in the sleepy town of Echo Ridge

What love about Karen MCmanus' books is her writing. It's really interesting to read a mystery/thriller book with dual POV because occasionaly author drops clues and hints in each of their chapters.

very honestly speaking, this book was a thousand times better than One of Us is Lying. i was even one of the ones who really liked One of Us is Lying, and Two Can Keep a Secret was LEAGUES better.

one of the main things that really set Two Can Keep a Secret apart was the characters.

I loved the characters. I loved how cracked and broken they were. How they didn’t come from perfect families. How they made many, many mistakes. How they grieved for those they lost, but they also let it fuel their desire to find the killer. How they overcome their pasts.

This book has 2 plot twists, and the first one...did surprise me, i expected something better tho. THE SECOND ONE??? THE ENDING? Had me GAGGED and literally almost threw up.

Let me tell you.

The last line.

THE LAST FUCKING LINE.

*spoilers*

✨i thought she was your mother✨.

This woman dropped the most disturbing line in the book history and thought it was fine.

Overall, totally recommend🙏🏻👭

Raiting:⭐⭐⭐.5

I did like this one more than some of the others, but let's talk about its big turn-off: Brynn and Tripp. I love when a mystery book has romance subolot, tbh i can't read a book that has 0 romance in it, but it's kind of annoying when you can feel the author is forcing two characters towards each other.

Brynn and Tripp have no chemistry at all. One of them was in love with the other, then Brynn leaves town for five years and when she comes back they try to resolve this mystery in their life. One of them declares itself to the other, and the other thinks its look has improved with time. They kiss and then they live happily ever after.

What's the point, exactly? Why should they be together when they’re clearly better as friends? What’s supposed to happen now, they’ll have three fantastic months and then break up before college?

It was entertining but the "plot twist" was not it. Like what was the point? If you gave the book "that" kind of ending, what is the point?

Raiting:⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

IDC THIS BOOK TRILLOGY WAS ABSOLUTE 6 STAR READ. (Go read it! Now!)

"Ash Princess is a trope-filled book with a very common story line. Theodosia, or Theo, was six years old when she witnessed her mother's (the queen) brutal murder and had her country conquered from her. In her country there are magical caves that run underneath the temples. For fire, air, earth and water. These are very sacred and only those who have proved themselves to the gods completely can go and get the magical gems. Now, Theo's people are forced to work as slaves in these mines and dig up the magical stones.

For ten years she has been living under the Kaiser and his brutal rule, living quietly and trying to please him to survive. All of that ends when she's forced to kill someone and her childhood friend comes and offers her an escape and make things right for their people. She's filled with hate and determination to take back her kingdom and avenge her mother and people."

The fmc in this book, Theodosia has become one of my favourite fmc! An example of fmc that doesn't need to be a bloodthirsty monster from the beggining to be considered as strong, mindful and brave.

CHECK THE TRIGGER WARNINGS!

Even tho it's YA there are some serious and heavy topics in this book so be aware of that!

THERE IS A FOUND FAMILY TROPE!

There is such cute and heart warming found family trope..*cough* with traumatised kids *cough*

I loved literally every character! (Well except for a few...)

LGBTQ+ REPRESENTATON OMGG!!!

The ROMANCE!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

One of the main reasons i loved this book,

Oh no, my guys, this has a LOVE TRIANGLE!!! [cue the groans of every person on the planet] LISTEN, I know y'all hate love triangles and I DO TOO!! but this one is somehow bearable, even though it annoyed me a lot. It's like one of "those" love triangles where it's obvious who MMC is. Theo has feelings for the Prinz and her childhood friend, some dude, whose name I forgot, because I DON'T FUCKING SHIP THEM. He's a really good guy, but Prinz Soren and Theo all the way, bitch. Like, they're both good boys, but idk something about the Prinz, man. HE IS BLONDE TOO!! It's a slow burn + forbidden romance.

Overall, I LOVED THE BOOKS, IT'S ONE OF MY FAV READS OF THE YEAR, and if you like high fantasy with great world building + found family + strong character + lgbtq characters + feminism elements GO READ IT ASAP.

Well this is part one! Also not proof read so please don't mind the mistakes🙏🏻

[rainbowcarousels]

Nicki for the character asks thing

Sexuality Headcanon: Somewhere on the bisexual spectrum but god only knows where. I think it's harder to label him because he doesn't really ascribe to them, but the way I see it, Nicki finds someone interesting or he doesn't, what's under their clothes is generally not part of that decision making process.

Gender Headcanon: Cis dude.

A ship I have with said character: Lestat/Nicki might be my OG m/m ship. I did ship Buffy/Faith Back In The Day, but this was the ship that lit things up for me because the interplay of them being sort of Sun and Moon really appeals to me. The bitterness of it and the beauty, that it's a tragedy that leaves such a mark on Lestat (and I think to a degree, Armand because of where he was mentally at the time) and that they got to have this brief period of being happy lost boys before they lost each other.

A BROTP I have with said character: I mean, I did literally write Nicki & Bianca's Excellent adventure but I understand why that might be a strange choice. Other than that, definitely Eleni, like she gets him and he doesn't want to set her on fire. That's as close as it gets.

A NOTP I have with said character: I don't know if I have one. Maybe Louis, actually, because I feel like he'd gack at the idea of it.

A random headcanon: That he talks to himself a lot, but it was generally under his breath before he became a vampire or just looked like pacing. Post-death, it comes out in full blown alliterative monologues. I think I showcased it pretty well in the disobedience that holds us together, but I think it's just that switch between being able to show a level of control and losing that control so everything just spills out like a broken faucet. I love looking at what gets amplified by the process of being a vampire and I think a semblence of civility is up there for Nicki, like the control of his mental vs what comes out is definitely compromised.

General Opinion over said character: He's an asshole and I love him. There's just something about the sheer will of it, like discovering the thing that brings you joy a little bit too late and wanting more time but the moment you get more time, you're too broken by a traumatic experience with a cult and the sense of betrayal with Lestat.

It is something I think gets forgotten sometimes, that he got gaslighted over his experience of seeing him pulled away out the window and everything he see's at Renaud's is dismissed so he spirals. Music is the only thing that makes sense and there's all this desolation of the soul wrapped up in that.

Also, he was Armand's first connection to the world after being out of it for so long, and I think some of that bitterness towards the world did infect him too. Nicki has one of the strongest imprints on the series while having so little 'screen'time, his ghost haunts those hallways and leaves its mark everywhere. There's always going to be something of him in Lestat's shadow.

[satans-helper]

Reaching for Stardust - Part XIV

Read Looking for Space here / Playlists / Read RFS on Wattpad

Word Count: ~3000

Warnings: sexy time ;)

<3

---

Indeed Josh was desperate–though thankfully not literally dying–to get home. With the green light from his doctor given that his heart rate improved and the antibiotics were in full swing, I gathered him into my car and we headed back to the apartment where his brothers still were. My tires crunched over salt and leftover snow as we drove into the monochromatic gray of our little world, the heat blasting over both of us but really so high just to keep Josh warm. He looked better–warm color had returned to his face and he actually appeared to be pretty well-rested despite not having slept in his own bed. 

“You’re feeling better?” I asked when we hit a red light. 

“Yes, mama. Certainly better,” Josh told me, then sniffed a little. “Thanks for doing all of this.”

“Anything for you.” I reached over to squeeze his knee. “I’m so glad you’re on the mend. I don’t want to bring you to the hospital ever again. Not for an illness, anyway.”

“I’ll do my best. What about you? I don’t want you to get sick either.”

“So far, so good.” I hit the gas again. “Maybe the universe knows both of us can’t be sick at the same time. But the boys are gonna stay today and tonight to help out and keep us company. They were coming up Thursday anyway. Might as well stick around now, right?”

“That’s good that they spent the night.”

“It helped. As soon as I got home without you, it felt intolerable.”

Josh let out a dry laugh. “I love you.”

I looked at him for a moment before I had to make a turn. “I love you more.”

In my peripheral vision, I could see Josh stare out the window at the snowy streets and say, “Impossible.”

Back home we were greeted by loud, excited jeers of triumph over Josh’s road to recovery as well as a few bags of sick staples–more soup and broth, more Gatorade, a package of those little boxes of fruit juice, some zinc, cough drops and a big box of Rocket Pops, which Josh immediately tore into. He plopped himself down on the couch with the Rocket Pop in his mouth while Jake sat down next to him, Sam paced the living room while monologuing about how disgusting hospitals were and Danny helped me put everything away. 

“You sure you guys wanna crash here again?” I asked him while he shoved the box of popsicles next to our other half-empty box of popsicles. “Don’t get me wrong–I love it. But I bet it feels pretty cramped. You should all be sleeping in beds.”

“We’ve agreed to stay here tonight,” Danny told me, balling up one of the empty plastic bags. “After that we’re gonna go back home.”

“Aw. Sam will miss you.”

“We live like, three blocks away from each other,” Danny replied with a little laugh. “So do you think Josh will be able to go to Thanksgiving?”

“I don’t know. Guess we’ll see.” I lifted a can of chicken noodle soup. “For now, this will have to do.” 

Jake ended up playing nurse more than I did–he spent the entire day doting on his twin, making sure he was taking his meds, feeding him, keeping him hydrated and comfortable. That gave me a chance to catch up on work, though Sam and Danny were distracting in their own right no matter what I did to try and carve out my own space. It was nice though, the coming together of everyone again for a prolonged period of time in a home base, even if that had been instigated by Josh getting sick. What mattered was that he was fully on the mend and we were all spending time together, and I found myself no longer thinking about death but rather thinking about how it might be possible to have this all the time. A commune was always sort of a joke idea, but couldn’t it be real? Why couldn’t we be tied together like one big, happy family? The boys had had that for many years. I was a newer addition. I wanted it to stay like that. I was pretty sure they all did too. Being apart made no sense and I got caught up in this fantasy while I tried to stay tied to my computer screen. Ultimately, no other place in the world felt as good as home did.

Things winded down even further after we all watched a movie. Jake, Danny and Sam took their respective couch and sleeping bag beds in the living room while I got some long-awaited alone time with Josh, who seemed absolutely delighted to be back in our bed. He snuggled back against the pillows in a clean set of pajamas–the fleece set patterned with puppies in Santa hats that I’d bought him two Christmases prior–looking cherubic and adorable and more healthy than he had at the hospital. 

Then he wiggled ferociously, hips shimmying on the mattress with an abundance of suppressed energy that finally could resurface. I smirked, standing in front of our dresser with my own pair of clean pajama pants waiting in my hands, and asked, “What’s up, buttercup?”

“I feel,” Josh began, bringing one hand down to his crotch. He grabbed himself, groping in a very uncharacteristic way that completely captured my attention. “Pent up.”

“Yeah, I bet,” I said, my attention drifting from changing my clothes to getting Josh out of his. “It’s been days since you…got off. Right?”

Josh nodded, palming himself through those silly fleece pants. It was one of those times where his almost innocent-seeming, unfathomably adorable nature butted up against the more robust biological male sex drive; how fascinating it was to see the mingling of those sides as often as I did. 

“Yeah. Days,” he said. “I think I need some help.”

I stepped over to the side of the bed, bending down to pet back the curls that had fallen down past his ears. His hair was growing out just a little bit. I secretly wished he’d let it all grow out completely and return to the wild, messy free set of long, sunkissed curls that I just loved running my fingers through. He looked up at me with the softest eyes, the dark, shiny irises reflecting the dim night table lamp, and I thought back briefly to the bachelorette party. 

“I have an idea,” I told him, already retreating to grab one of the gift bags that was still sitting in the corner of our bedroom. One peek inside allowed me to see that bottle of edible body oil–raspberry-vanilla flavored. Questionable, but certainly worth trying. With that now in my hand, I swiveled to face Josh again: “You should get naked.”

Josh gave me his best puppy dog eyes. “No foreplay?”

I shook the bottle, the wet, gloopy sound making him perk up. “This is all foreplay, baby.” Before I got ahead of myself, I paused. “I should get a towel.” 

I slipped out of the bedroom to the hall to grab one of our least desirable towels from the linen closet, then peered further down the hall to check on the boys–Danny and Sam were chatting, the TV blinking in front of them, and Jake was lounging beneath one of our extra throw blankets, the book in front of his face illuminated by the end table lamp. We were all basking in different lights tonight, I thought as I crept back to the bedroom, but I thought my Starshine was by far the brightest.

But he could also be the loudest. I grabbed the little fan from our closet and set it up on the dresser next to the humidifier for some extra white noise, pointing it away from the bed, and motioned for Josh to move to the side so I could lay the towel down. He got up entirely and stripped down to nothing, and I watched, soaking him up with my eyes. True aging hadn’t exactly hit either of us yet–sure, a few new, at first odd-looking lines had grown into our faces, our tolerance for certain foods had changed, hair grew differently–more slowly, it seemed–metabolism slowed down just a touch. More than anything, I could see that some of his juvenile, boyish looks had developed. But true aging was far off, I felt, and it was even further away for Josh, who continued to embody such youth and vitality despite getting older that it sometimes felt as though getting old would never touch him. 

Again, I thought as I dropped to my knees in front of him while he laid back on the bed, almost like he was immortal. That’s a big part of why him being in the hospital was so scary–because until that moment, Josh had seemed completely, totally untouched and eternal. 

I almost asked if he really felt up for a “full release,” but he was already hard and looking very eager, thighs spread and his erection firmly pressed against his belly. But I did remind him of one thing after I squeezed a bit of the oil into my hands: “You’ll need a shower after this. This stuff feels sort of sticky.”

“That’s okay,” he said, voice still a little hoarse but still an improvement from a few days prior. He laid back, propped up on his elbows, watching while I brought my hands to his calves. When my hands slid up to his thighs, he laid back flat, stretching his arms up over his head. “Nice and slow seems right. I’m beat.”

“I bet you are.” I broke contact to get more oil–it smelled okay, like the artificial raspberry I was used to from candy and a touch of sugary-sweet fake vanilla, but I was still a bit apprehensive about the taste. I worked my hands around his thighs, massaging gently and intentionally ignoring his most sensitive part; his quads were strong, perpetually taut, and his inner thighs were delightfully soft, his skin pliable as I worked my hands over them. I leaned forward to lick–mostly to try the taste, really, which ended up being a primarily bitter, fake fruit flavor. It made me pause for a second, which Josh noticed, looking down curiously. I slid my tongue between my teeth, making a sour face, but the after-taste was actually less unpleasant. 

“How is it?” he asked, still keeping his hands behind his head. I wasn’t sure everyone got to see it in action, but there were plenty of instances in which Josh could exhibit impressive patience.

“Not terrible?” I replied, then finally wrapped my hand around his cock, hot and hard within my palm, and Josh laid his head back down. The oil did serve as a solid lubricant, I could give it all the credit there–the slide was slick and easy but I went slow, massaging his thigh and up to his hip with my other slippery hand. I ran my thumb over the little slant of bone, fingers splayed over his side, then back down and around to squeeze his ass as best I could. It didn’t take much effort until Josh was whimpering–a little too loudly. I squeezed a little harder in warning and said, “Best to be quiet, babe. They’re not asleep out there.” 

“I’m too pent up!” Josh replied in a frenzied yet hushed huff, thrashing his arms. The whole thing made me laugh but I slid my hand back to his inner thigh, massaging again, and he stilled with a silent nod, pressing his lips together tight. So I carried on, petting his leg and up to his side while I stroked him, studying the slight curves of his body and the heat that was radiating from everywhere. Thankfully, however, it wasn’t a fever anymore. It was pure arousal, all those hormones festering for too long in that beautiful form. 

“You’re still the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” I told him with complete intention, my eyes grazing from his tense neck down to the quivering belly. “Even when you have pneumonia.”

“You don’t get to talk if I can’t,” Josh replied, abs tightening while his cock twitched in my hand.

I laughed softly. “Fine, fine.” I brought my face lower while I pushed one of his legs to the side a bit. “Fair’s fair, I guess,” I added before I pressed my mouth to his inner thigh, beginning with a kiss, carrying on with a long lick and ending with a bite. With Josh holding back another whimper that I could see caught in his throat, I decided to go all in, swiping my tongue up his length while I gently squeezed his balls.

It still caught me by surprise how abruptly he came. I pulled back just in time to let Josh’s abdomen catch a bit of the release, the rest caught in my fist while I kept pumping him and, throughout it, he was biting his lip to keep himself as quiet as possible. His fists clenched the sheets until his knuckles were white, every muscle in his body visibly tightening and then contracting. He thrashed a bit to tell me no more, so I released him and wiped my hand on the towel beneath him.

I sat by his side, placing my cleaner hand atop his chest. “You should really breathe, though. For the sake of your lungs.” His heartbeat was strong, though–I could feel it beneath my palm.

Josh let out a long breath through his nose, then covered his mouth with his arm to cough a bit. “Sorry,” he said, sounding more spent than he did earlier, but in a good way. “Wow. Alright, darling, I definitely needed that.” He looked down at himself and groaned. “But now I do need to hop in the shower again and I really don’t feel like moving.” 

“If I could carry you, I totally would,” I told him, bending down to give him a long kiss, sickness be damned. “Want me to run you a bath?”

Josh’s hand gently clasped the back of my head, keeping me pinned in front of his face. “Only if you take the bath with me.”

I suddenly remembered the three other people in our apartment. “Maybe we should just make it a quick shower,” I said to Josh, looking behind myself at the bedroom door. “We’re not the only ones here tonight.”

Josh huffed dramatically. “They can hold their piss for a little while.” He rolled out from beneath me and got on his feet, taking the dirty towel and tossing it into our laundry basket, then planted his hands on his hips as he stood in front of the door. “Come on, love.”

I relented and, in the bath, I leaned back against the tub and held Josh between my legs. “I hate to say it, but you might need to skip Thanksgiving this year,” I told him as I rubbed soap beneath his armpits. “Do you think your parents will be really upset?”

“They completely expected me to miss it. My mom cried more than you did.”

“Well, I’m not surprised. It’s gotta be hard to see her baby in the hospital, even if you’ve been there like a hundred times before.” 

“Not a hundred.”

“Close enough. Too many times.” I ran one hand up to the back of his neck, massaging a little, and gave him the reminder of, “You’re not allowed to go back to the hospital ever again.” 

Josh laughed, turning his head to look over his shoulder at me. “What if I need to?”

“You won’t. This was enough for a lifetime.” I plunged my hands down in front of him before bringing the soapy water up to his chest, running them over his pecs and shoulders; he hummed contently and I moved my touch beneath his arms. The scrubbing motion of my fingers and palms made him start to laugh and wiggle, water splashing around us. I put my chin on his shoulder, turning to nibble at his ear: “Ticklish?”

Through more uncontrollable laughter, Josh said, “Yes, you know this!” He wiggled some more, slippery hands flying to my wrists. “Play nice.”

“But I love hearing you laugh like that,” I told him, although I did, after another second, cease the torment. I nuzzled into his neck, closing my eyes. “Even though I’m sure the boys have a very clear idea of what we’re doing now.”

“Spooning in the bath? They’re imaginations could never,” Josh said, flicking water away from himself to let it splash against the tiled wall. “So, doll–what’s next on our list for the wedding? I have to admit I haven’t been thinking about it much these past few days.”

I resumed rubbing his shoulders and up to the nape of his neck. “Me either. That’s been weirdly kind of nice. But I think we’re settled for a while. We finalized the cake order so that’s good to go. Everything else is set.”

“Except the ‘couple’s shower,’” Josh reminded me, tilting his head back to try and meet my eyes. 

“Yes, that. I’m glad we’re not just doing a bridal shower. So lame,” I said with a chuckle, twirling a damp curl between my fingers. “Not everything has to be so separate and weird. I need you there for that for sure.” 

A brisk knock on the door made us both turn our heads. “Hey, lovebirds,” Sam called out. “Danny’s gotta piss so can you wrap up whatever it is you’re doing in there?”

“He can’t ask us himself, Sammy?” Josh asked with a laugh.

“He’s shy,” I reminded him, patting his shoulder. “Okay. Let’s get up.”

---

Tagging: @sparrowofrhiannon @starbuggie @lightsofthe-living-gvf @sanguinebats @gvfrry @clairesjointshurt @bizzielisteningtogreta @jjwasneverhere

If you'd like to be tagged in any of my fics, you can go here or DM me :)

[kindheart525]

It was a busy Thursday afternoon at the Ponyville theatre, for there was soon to be a production of Roemeo and Muleiet put on by the local foals. A well-studied work of Shankspear, a timeless tale of a young seapony and mule defying their families for love, every young actor was thrilled to show off their talents in these roles.

And the tech crew was hard at work making sure everything would run smoothly behind the scenes.

Boot Polish strolled across the backstage workspace, proudly taking note of all the students working so diligently on their props.

“The scenery is coming along splendidly,” he voiced his pride out loud. “You are all excellently keeping pace. You have just over two weeks until tech week, so keep going!”

Several of the students murmured in affirmation through the paintbrushes and other tools clenched in their mouths. One of them commented,

“I’m sure we’ll be done in time, no problem. I wonder how the actors are doing?”

“Yesterday I heard Tiramisu in the bathroom practicing her lines for the nurse,” another replied.

“During class?”

“Mmhm!”

“Oh, those theatre ponies can’t get a break!” This techie, Skydance, put down their paintbrush with a chuckle. “Correction, they don’t let themselves get a break. Practicing their lines at every hour of the day. Eating, sleeping, and breathing the show.”

“Literally, I heard Dove Song practices her lines in her sleep.”

All the young techies laughed at this, and even Boot couldn’t help but chuckle along at the youthful passion.

Skydance was a bit cocky about it, though, but in a playful way.

“It’s not like it’s that hard!” They claimed. “All they have to do is memorize words and know where to walk. We have to paint backgrounds, and make costumes, and build a bunch of props that they end up breaking, and we only have this time to do it!”

As if to emphasize their more crunched schedule, they made a few paintbrush strokes on their prop as they spoke.

“Now, memorizing takes a great deal of effort as well,” Boot tried to gently point out. “The mental energy required can be grandiose. You only need ask Mrs. Stockholm about it.”

Although he was lighthearted in his explanation, a part of him felt like he was defending his wife, more particularly the honor of her life’s work as a master of memory.

“Consider, you get to leave here and go about the rest of your pursuits freely until the next session. The actors must work around the clock to ensure they have memorized their cues. Do you follow that?”

“Yeah, sure, I know,” Skydance somewhat waved him off. “I just think some of them overthink it.”

They put a hoof to their chest and raised another in the air in a somewhat exaggerated manner, taking a deep breath and reciting:

“Tis but thy name that is my enemy; Thou art thyself, though not a Moraygue. What’s Moraygue? it is nor tail, nor hoof, Nor flank, nor face, nor any other part Belonging to a creature. O, be some other name! What’s in a name? that which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet.”

Despite their humorous intentions, Skydance delivered Muleiet’s monologue with such passion, yet such expert nuance, that their fellow techies couldn’t help but pause their work to watch. A small crown of them gathered around watching with wide eyes as if they were attending the play itself.

Skydance was oblivious to the stares even once they opened their eyes.

“That was like, half the monologue. I only had to read it a couple times to know all that, so why’s there such a big fuss? It’s easy.”

“Or maybe you’re just really good at remembering things.”

One of their peers commented. Another added,

“Yeah, like, I couldn’t memorize all that.”

A small chorus of mumbling indicated that others felt the same.

“Not just remembering, but like, acting too. You did really good.”

Even Boot had to take a moment to compose his thoughts after that small performance, having been temporarily lost in the surprise this budding talent brought him.

“Have you ever considered taking a role as an actor?”

“Not really.”

Skydance shrugged.

“I’m just not that type. I’ve met a few theatre ponies and I’m nothing like them. I mean, it’s kind of fun to pretend to be someone else sometimes, for laughs and such…”

Their demeanor changed a bit as they started reflecting more.

“And I guess it’d be kind of fun to do it on a stage. But I’m just not what you think of when you hear ‘actor,’ you know? You always think of the ones that are like, crazy about musicals!”

It was a wildly different situation, Boot almost wondered if it would be unfair to make such a comparison, but he couldn’t help but think of somepony he knew who was making her way in the theatre world. In a way, she, too, broke the mold of what most expected an actress to be, yet it was creating a world of opportunities for others.

“Now, who would earnestly suggest that there is one way for an actor to behave?”

He posed the question to his student.

“There is no one prescribed personality for an actor to have, nor a technical artist! You mustn’t allow that to limit you. If you feel you would enjoy being on the other side of the curtain, why, you should try it!”

Skydance’s eyes widened with wonder just thinking about it, but their face quickly twisted into a look of hesitation.

“You really think I should get into all that?”

“Whether you should is up to you,” Boot gently corrected them. “Nopony else can tell you what is meant to be. I only suggest that you consider it.”

A small smile formed on his face.

“You never know, it could be better than you dreamed.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Previous: Our Own Star Next (end flashback): Every Rose

This was a collaboration with characters drawn by: - Me (owner of Boot Polish and Skydance) - AzzyNextGens (owner of Honey Velvet) - @cornerofhell (owner of Sugar Skull) - @dumb-a-horses (owner of Nebula) - @dahliarauxt (owner of Apple Bites)

[olivieraa]

my main gripe, and has always been my biggest problem with SnK since the day I first watched it 10 years ago, is that it has a pacing issue

I don't understand how a show can be both fast paced and slow paced at the same time, but no matter how many times I've watched it (seen s1 4 times, s2 once (now twice)), I feel the same every time

there's a lot of dragged out dialogue

and I mean draaaaaaaaaaaged out

I've had this problem with a few animes in the past as well, mainly YGO. YGO went on for 4 years I think? but what happens in the show is done in the span of a year, possibly only a few months. literally all of Battle City, Noah's arc, and the duel tower take place in about 3 days. That's around 100 eps = 3 days (I'll have to check to get the accuracy here but I'm either exactly right or not far off). but 100 eps, from different seasons, that was probably done over a 2 year span when it was released.

so while watching a show, and it takes 2 years for these two seasons to come out, your mind doesn't register that those 2 years irl are 2-4 days in the show.

and I know its the dub, which cant be credited, but one character even mentions how its been 4 years (I THINK someone says it to Yami in the airport, it may have been Anzu, I skip that ep a lot bc of its woeful animation)

SnK is a little different. its similar in the sense that a good chunk of eps are just one day in that world, but then they also do a lot of flashbacks to show that there was a lot of behind the scenes development we didn't see, shit like that. so its a lot better.

but its still dragged out. everyone's inner monologue takes up half an ep. the constant planning takes so long, only for them to not actually do that plan bc something interrupted the plan so its now a new plan.

Eren's basement was mentioned mid-way through season 1. barely ever brought up again. and I know it then took fucking 4 years to bring out s2 (where I dont even know if it was mentioned at all), and I've no idea what happens s3 wise.

my past memory of SnK manga from 10 years ago was Armin getting kidnapped cause they think he's Historia. that or the part where Levi picks her up. that's where my knowledge of SnK ends. I have not seen that animated. I'm assuming it'll be in s3.

I remember the whole "WHAT'S IN THE DAMN BASEMENT???" shit going around. and its very frustrating, bc the storyline makes you think they forgot, and just kept making new plans and prioritising everything else over getting this one damn answer, and that months and months to maybe even a year have passed by without nobody mentioning the basement again or making any plans to get to it.

but in actuality, the majority of these eps prob take place in about a week, maybe 2. and that it actually hasn't been THAT long since Eren mentioned the basement. but its made so unclear, that it feels dragged out to fuck, which is what caused such fandom frustration.

for all I know, season 3 is aaaaaaaaaall about getting to that damn basement. but still, it is frustrating when your mind is going, "these damn people are constantly on the hunt for answers and yet there's no adamancy to get the basement which may have all the answers???"

ANYWAYS

finally onto a season that'll be completely new to me (minus whatever I saw in the manga before I'd caught up to it 10 years ago)

I'll start tagging it now lol

[littlethingwithfeathers]

ask meme - 18 and/or 24!

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they? I never specifically set out to emulate anyone in particular, but I can definitely see some influences on my work. When I'm writing descriptions, I see a lot of Tolkein and Jacqueline Carey surfacing. I am always one for plush over-describing, and while I dial it back occasionally for pacing, it doesn't happen often. I've been told my writing is indulgent and that is a compliment in my book. I also sense a lot of Laurell K. Hamilton in my writing. My dialogue is very pithy and sharp, especially if there's ever an internal monologue going. I tend to have a very dry sense of humor generally. Also, Chuck Palahniuk's style creeps in sometimes too. He can turn a phrase like a top but only use half the words anyone else does. It's great. 24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

Oh, it's definitely happened a few times. Probably the biggest standout is my Chernobyl fic "Intercalation" where I literally had a physics professor teach me nuclear physics because there were lectures on the same in the fic that were basically intricate and protracted metaphors. And like... I write MCU fanfic so I know all about handwaving science, but this involved a real event with real science going very wrong, so I needed to actually get it right. I read books on the Chernobyl disaster (partly for personal interest but also for the fic), and my physics professor friend (who teaches a section of physics specifically for liberal arts majors that focuses more on the philosophy and art of physics than all the math) would literally give me lectures on things like Cherenkov radiation, ionization of gases, radiation effects, and so on. Some of those lectures are even in the fic almost word for word. Other than that... it's happened here and there. Maybe not to that level, but I've definitely had to do some long Wikipedia trawls to make a fic go. My cooking game has definitely upped from writing all that Hannibal fic. My fic "Room for Rent in the Fourth Estate" required me to basically do investigative journalism into predatory recruitment tactics of the US military in poor school districts because Darcy needed data. I've had a few comments where people have said they had no idea those kinds of recruitment tactics were happening (I cited my sources) and did their own research! So hey... win-win there! Right now I'm deep diving into the history of computer viruses and hacking for a -possible- Matrix fic I'm rewriting/writing from back in 2003. I make no promises that it'll ever see the light of day, but I definitely know more about the Love Bug Virus than I ever did before. Thank you for the asks, lovely!

[erstwhilesparrow]

oh boy this got long but fic recs, organized by fandom:

life series (or, oops all double life + one (1) limited life fics):

sugar, we're going down swinging; BananasofThorns - Double Life oneshot. Etho and Joel are the last ones standing. A lot of bloody violence, but it's so pretty and the pacing is perfect.

Soulmate-Things With Other People; savannah_owl - Double Life oneshot. People break off in pairs during Impulse and Bdubs's pool party to.... hang out. Featuring many pairs from previous seasons or other series. It's lots of fun and more innuendo than not.

and by resilient i mean which holds; TheYesterdayShow - Double Life oneshot (are you noticing a pattern). Martyn and Cleo win. It's... still not working out for them. Pitch-perfect character voice. A little bitter, a little sad, a little looking at the pieces of a life that was never going to happen.

to catch a secret soulmate; wormcity - Oh you know what this is by now. The server comes together to (attempt to) catch Bigb's secret soulmate. I once said I would nominate this for "Best At Capturing Double Life's Sitcom Energy" and I stand by that!!

you're the fool, i'm just as well; honeyblock - You know. Pearl gets sick. Scott, feeling the effects of this through the soulbond, attempts to deal with this. A delight to read -- everyone is miserable and there are so many good lines.

under my skin?; Sixteenthdays - Double Life. The soulbond is literally, physically giving each pair their partner's traits. People attempt to cope with this to varying degrees of success. It's sad or sweet or charming; it's good writing all around.

rainy day; whatcaniwriteinthis - Double Life. It's raining, and everyone settles in to wait it out. Little vignettes showing off what everyone is up to. I like the style of the narration; it's fun!

those were kinder times; SurrealSupernaturalist - Double Life. Team Rancher, in another world. The overwhelming feeling of this fic is warmth and sweetness. Look, you want domestic fluff of Team Rancher living their lives on an actual ranch? This is it!

the lamb & the knife; errorryx - Limited Life. Cleo warns Pearl they're going to summon a goddess of war. Pearl considers this and attempts her own summoning. Maybe I just like when Pearl thinks about killing, what of it.

hermitcraft (or, i might have favourite authors):

Tour Day (Or: "Four Times Cub Was the Weird One, and Two Times He Wasn't"); mxMallory - Season 9. Jimmy arrives on Hermitcraft for a tour of the server and discovers just how deranged the Hermits are. Funny and charming and it's good when people are flabbergasted by Canon-Typical Hermit Behaviour.

a beginner's guide to the guardianship and maintenance of neutral territory (hermitcraft-specific); Sixteenthdays - Season 7. One of the hazards of the profession is sometimes you get a little possessed by your base. It's cool! It's fine! (It's really fucking good writing.) Light formatting fuckery. Makes me want to yell.

fixed and dilated; iamsolarflare - Season...8? Xb and Hypno circle each other. They're friends, they're running Horse Head Farms together, they're both trying to figure out the other's secrets without revealing their own. Something about the characters' internal monologues is very good. Clever people thinking interesting things.

Brave New World; savannah_owl - Season 9. From the moment the Hermits set foot in their new world, things start going wrong. Incredibly good at setting an ominous tone and sticking to it. I'm fascinated by the worldbuilding re: how and when the Hermits record themselves.

Pitfalls; storm_warning - Season 9. Doc has a baby dragon for a pet. This one's cute, silly, and good times all around.

empires (or, oh god what the hell when did i get this many bookmarks):

here it is (our final night alive); BananasofThorns - Season 1. The various happenings around the dragon fight, but in a God AU. This author writes such good action sequences. I've said before it's like watching someone who is very good at parkour do their thing, and I'm right!!

follow the leader; Dynames2308 - Season 1. The Codfather leaves and his people follow. Wanna get so so sad about Jimmy with me in less than 250 words? Read this one!

A Matter of Dust; hallmarked_error - Season 1. Daemon AU, following the twins fWhip and Gem as they grow up, and figure out what growing up means in the process. You know how sometimes sticking to a very traditional structure / style / theme can be a demonstration of incredible technical skill? That's what's happening here.

Enough; orphan_account - Season 1. fWhip gets corrupted. He and Pix have a final confrontation in front of the Vigil. Overwhelmingly the vibes of [everyone here is doomed]. I like the Pix & Jimmy, and I like what's going on with fWhip.

and we all know how this will end; weareallstardustfallen - Season 1. fWhip and Pix hang out at the Vigil and talk a bit about Pixandrian customs. This one's quiet and steady and tender and melancholy. Good for Gunpowder Boys friendship and banger lines.

Private Lessons; RainyDayDecaf - Season 2. Scott and Sausage flirting at the new dance studio in Chromia. That's the whole fic, but I promise it's really charming.

These Stones Remember; ValloisFulcanelli - Season 2. A series of short scenes in which Pixlriffs explores the ancient capital. Slightly an AU in ways that are hard to describe? But it's very pretty and will make you vaguely achy about the depths of history and the enormity of time and space.

Drunk and Desireable; SolSearchingNights - Season 2. Katherine and Jimmy find each other at a Tumble Town bar and discover they have a lot in common re: the state of their love lives. Really funny; it turns out these two are utterly delightful together!

Gin and Juice; mxMallory - Season 2. Hermes sets out to figure out why no one will talk to him about this mysterious thirteenth empire out in the mesa. Written in something like a storybook style, it's really cute! Incredibly charming.

take the crown; NavnLark - Season 2. Great Witch Shelby, from childhood to present. Wanna get so so sad about Shelby with me? I'm having trouble describing what I like about this but I like it a lot.

toys and toymakers; rabbit_with_a_sword - Season 2. A god's belief is enough to turn a town into a toyhouse. Horror-flavoured. Well-written and pretty and appropriately upsetting!

Living Ghosts; Umbrify - Season 2. Jimmy sneaks into the Goblands's storehouse to cause problems. He is... maybe not successful. fWhip and Jimmy get to be a little haunted by whatever's left of their relationship! The little details are piercing and sad.

oh great Minecraft Bee, do you have any fic recs in the realm of hermitcraft, empires, and/or the life series?

(sorry if you answered this recently or don’t want it asked, searching on mobile is difficult)

other than “the sky weighs heavy tonight” by mawofthemagnetar, not really many recently! this isn’t because there aren’t a lot of good fics, this is because I am so bad at reading in my writing fandom and am so bad at remembering fics to actually rec them. like I KNOW I’ve read other fics lately I’d love if I could rec. I just have no idea what they are.

so! here’s where I say: my followers! use this post to fic rec! I could use a rec list too, honestly! and I’ll reblog any lists you give me here! help me and anon out!

[lifeinpoetry]

literally, don’t be this parent

Was on Twitter and saw a post about a parent deleting their kid’s Minecraft world of a year or so & cutting off internet access as punishment for oversleeping during this pandemic. It brought me back to a psychiatrist’s attempts to have my parents do something similar with my mental health support website and blog that I’d started at fifteen. & I was to be cut off from the internet. Completely. In a world where there was no Google or Wikipedia this wasn’t seen as extreme. 

This psychiatrist was the main person on my mental health team during a hospitalization. I was unaware he’d attempted to get my parents to agree to institutionalize me until sometime within the past year or so. I have handwaved so much shittiness from mental health professionals but his frustration with my passive noncompliance is so clear to me now in ways I didn’t understand back then. I didn’t act out so I couldn’t be tackled to the ground and stuck in one of those ‘timeout’ rooms. I was polite, never talked back, went to all groups, was med compliant, went to all meals, and was open to the multiple interviews with med students. He pathologized the only time I’ve ever screamed at a psychiatrist (or any health professional) in the past 20-ish years of treatment. He’d just told me my parents were going to delete my website (& hand coded blog) and cut off all internet access at home. I think most people would react poorly.

Attempting to cut me off from my online support when my home life was abusive and potentially dangerous was my psychiatrist’s parting shot after weeks of pissing him off by not lying and going ahead with signing his contract for safety, for not complying in a way he could punish any further without going to court. They’d already taken away my right to wear anything but a hospital gown on the ward during the majority of my stay, the mental health rights handbook was a joke on that count. I was on one to one for the majority of my stay. People watched me piss, shit, and shower. Privacy was a privilege. People were normally allowed to order what they wanted for their meals but that was another privilege I didn’t have. I was always locked out of my room. My unofficial diagnosis was Borderline Personality Disorder — I was a minor — because it was popular at the time and because I was a young person who self-harmed and generally felt numb because of emotional & verbal abuse at home, and the underlying threat of potential violence. BPD is not a diagnosis that has carried over into adulthood.

& my immigrant parents who grew up poor in hometowns where psychiatrists were not considered an option, are boomer-age, who were in a fucked up marriage, and had little awareness of the internet defied every single one of his attempts at making me comply. They chose to have me to come home and start my first semester of university instead of being sent off somewhere long-term. They did not delete my website. My internet access was not cut off. It was not even restricted. & that wasn’t because they were always lenient or because they were online outside the AOL address my mom had at the time. It was because they saw me as a person whose online projects had value even if they didn’t really understand the internet. They realized I’d worked on my website for over two years & that it meant something to me at a time where I cared for & felt almost nothing. I’d just been hospitalized for six weeks because of my post-HS graduation suicide attempt. 

Just tired of some people still not taking online projects/games seriously. It’s 2020. & so many people feeling the effects of the pandemic in ways I’m not used to seeing outside my neurodivergent/neuroatypical friends so your kid oversleeping seems like a normal response to staying home all day every day while the world outside is determined to sacrifice the vulnerable — including grandma — in the name of capitalism. It’s been nineteen years since my experience and some people are still pretending it’s okay to set fire to their kid’s creative projects because they’re deluded into believing nothing their kid does on the internet is valuable and that there’s no inherent violence in punitive deletion because they can’t smell the smoke.

tl;dr: A random tweet reminded of the time a psychiatrist attempted to institutionalize me, have my website, personal blog & forum deleted, and all access to the Internet restricted post-hospitalization because I was passively noncompliant in a way his multiple attempts of breaking me couldn’t touch & my immigrant parents refused to go along with his plans despite our fucked up home life. So let’s not do punitive deletion of a kid’s online world in an attempt to make them act like the pandemic isn’t affecting them.

[twopoppies]

Hi Gina! Hope your day is lovely! Which are your favorite fics with the best internalized monologues? Especially Louis, but Harry as well. Thank you!♥️

Oh, that's such a good question. I'm surprised I don't have a rec for that already. But here you go!

Touch You Where You’re Hardest by writemeatattoo / @694699 (E, 6K) This was such a surprise to find… beautiful writing, super sexy, a perfect back and forth internal monologue of that moment you tip over the edge from friends to lovers. Highly recommend savoring the sentences.

Danger I Can’t Hide by CelticSky (E, 227K) This one’s got all the tension and drama you’d expect of a World War II story—life and death high stakes, friends and lovers unexpectedly torn apart, battles and heroism, plus the added stakes of classism and homophobia—then add a slow burn, high risk, scorching love affair spanning years. If you want a story that’s complex and fantastically researched, plus lovers to root for, read it. It’s long. But I couldn’t put it down.

Faking It by TheCellarDoor (M, 46K)This one is so sweet. I loved Harry's internal monologue... his insecurities and thoughts that he'd made Louis uncomfortable because he liked, him made me cry. Louis is so soft and supportive. It’s just a lovely fic.

Our Lives, Non Fiction by @indiaalphawhiskey (E, 114K) this is, quite literally, the best fic I’ve read in years. It’s so well written, clever, funny, emotional, and sexy. Its draw you in immediately and you’ll end up falling in love with these characters before you know it. Don’t miss this one.

Pull Me Under by zarah5 (E, 140K) One of the very first fics I read when I came into this fandom…and I’ve read it multiple times since. Zarah’s fics hold up every time. This one has it all, great pacing, ot5 friendship, banter, super sexy smut, etc etc. Plus, Louis being super jealous of Harry’s best friend. Zarah writes really terrific internal monologue and her fics are all so good. I'd definitely check her entire catalogue. Link is to a download.

Things Unsaid by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup (GA, 4K) This is so sweet and cute, I actually laughed out loud a couple of times. Louis’ internal monologue is neurotic and funny and this is such a fun twist on soulmates.

boy with kaleidoscope eyes by docklands / @hershelsue (E, 8K) This was just lovely. There was so much tender sweetness in the way they treated each other and I loved that even though it was just in Louis’ POV, we still got a very clear picture of how Harry felt. Honestly Louis in this fic is just sweetest thing ever. Harry should marry that boy.

don't have to go to the pool by kingsoftheimpossible (E, 12K) I just loved this one. This author captures the overwhelm and insecurity and desperation of a high school crush so well. Plus, the shaving scene is ridiculously sexy.

For Reasons Wretched and Divine by @indiaalphawhiskey (E, 95K) Really well written, angsty, emotional fic. I love this author’s ability to draw you in so deeply (and the smut is excellent).

all my love was down in a frozen ground by navigator (E, 16K) This is an old one that I didn’t have bookmarked for some reason. But it’s a favorite and I love everything this author wrote. This is one of those quiet, soft fics with a bit of angst and a lot of internal monologue and gentle conversations. I don’t know, there’s something so touching about it.

A Slow and Steady Rush by godots (E, 12K) I really enjoyed how this one was almost all internal monologue and how the slow build up led to a sweet and awkward first time for them. Just really nicely written.

My Lights Stay Up, But Your City Sleeps by PearlyDewdrops (E, 108K) Featuring lots of pining, really well done internal monologue from Louis, and excellent smut. It also has some really lovely writing that I felt captured the pain of mental illness/anxiety very well.

Could you love me anyway by @sadaveniren (E, 13K) I particularly like the way this fic handles both kink exploration and Harry’s internal monologue of negative self talk – both felt really well realized and realistic.

to hell with romancing by @bottomlinsons (E, 8K) This is worth reading for Harry’s internal monologue alone. This is just a funny fic that morphs into a sweet and really sexy one. Link is to a download.

Laundry Room by beautlouis (E, 10K) I always love an unusual meet-cute, especially when it’s combined with a quirky internal monologue, banter, and super hot smut. This one has it all.

use somebody by istajmaal (E, 5K) One of the things I love about fics from Nick’s POV is that he’s very much an insider, but he’s also very much outside the bubble of LouisandHarry. But here he’s been invited in. Sort of. I just love everything about how he and Louis bicker, Nick’s internal monologue, the set up. It’s all really well done.

it's all fun and games until by louisandthealien (E, 6K) Everything this author writes is just... so good. This one has a fantastic internal monologue from Louis, it’s sweet and sexy, and just a perfect little uni AU.

Right Side of the Wrong Bed by eyesofshinigami (E, 11K) Louis’ internal monologue makes this one so quirky and fun. It’s just a lighthearted meet cute with a dash of some good smut

[jungshookz]

smitten: y/n's note is in jungkook's bag and she needs to get it back like, right now

➺ pairing; jeon jungkook x reader

➺ genre; smitten!miniseries!! bff!kook & smitten!y/n!! university!au!! honk honk humour!! the boo hoo angsty wattpad-energy fic of your dreams!! unrequited love!! it hurts so bad but that's what makes it so good!!

➺ wordcount; 7.1k

➺ summary; y/n realizes her meticulously written i love you note is burning a hole at the bottom of jungkook's bag and the mere thought of him finding it is enough to make her feel sick to her stomach.

➺ what to expect; "well, maybe the reason why you're just friends is because the two of you won't allow yourselves to be more than that."

➺ smitten: part one [the almost confession]

»»————- 🖤 ————-««

[previously, on smitten...]

what?

where the hell is it?

you reach into the side pockets and you're disappointed when you end up pulling out old tissues and empty gum wrappers

it's not in the front pocket either — just your keys, a pack of bubblegum, and a small bottle of hand sanitizer

your brows knit together in deep thought as you settle back against your seat, your eyes flickering to the side as you-

you immediately pale

oh my god.

you're positive that your heart stops beating for three whole seconds the moment you realize where exactly the note is — because no, you idiot, you didn't shove it into your own bag earlier-

the note is in jungkook's bag.

»»————- 🖤 ————-««

the next thirty or so minutes of class seem to drag on at a snail's pace and you find yourself checking the time on your phone every five seconds to see when you can finally dart out those doors

your first instinct was to immediately get up and leave because of course you wanted to immediately get up and leave, but with only twenty-ish people in the class and the fact that you're seated near the front... well, it would be a little awkward to just pack up your things and trek up towards the doors without a legitimate excuse (you were tempted to tell your professor that your stomach wasn't feeling very good but the thought of your peers associating you with explosive diarrhea quickly changed your mind)

so, you decided to be a good student and wait it out — but, being perfectly honest, you haven't really been paying much attention to the professor since the thought of you shoving your hi bestie, i'm head-over-heels in love with you note into jungkook's bag instead of yours contaminated your mind five minutes ago

...

you let out a little huff before shaking your head to yourself

how could you be so careless?!

you don't even know how it happened

your bag was sitting on your right thigh, jungkook's bag was sitting on your left thigh... so how the hell did you manage to shove it into his bag??

on the bright side, at least you know where it is, right?

it's in the right side pocket of the bag, so all you have to do is unzip it and stick your hand in and out really quickly without jungkook noticing you rummaging around in his belongings

...but what if he's already read the note?

your foot taps impatiently against the carpeted ground and you reach up and start tugging at your earlobe anxiously, your eyes flickering up towards the dusty analog clock hanging on the wall

c'mon... c'mon...

your grip tightens around your pencil as you continue to trace circles aimlessly on the page, the paper crinkling slightly from the amount of pressure you're putting on it

the stress that's currently eating away at you is probably going to take ten years off your life

"-so, that's pretty much it from me for the day!"

you don't think you've ever been so happy for a class to end as soon as the screen goes black at the front and you waste absolutely no time in packing up

you probably look insane trying to shove your laptop and your notebook into your bag at the same time but you couldn't care less at this point because you need to get the hell out of here

"-please remember to contribute to the discussion threads online... at least four responses, please, and none of those bullshit 'yes, i agree!' responses. i'm definitely not going to count those as participation marks-"

you close your bag with a sharp ziiiip! and you hurry to fold the squeaky desk back into place, a couple of people turning to glance at you for the sudden abundance of clattering and knocking coming from your direction

"excuse me, pardon me-" you pull your backpack on as you step over multiple sets of legs, trying your best not to trample on any feet or knock anyone's tooth out with your bag, "sorry! excuse me-"

you can feel the adrenaline pumping through your veins as you jog up the steps two at a time, your brain immediately mapping out the route to the library jungkook said he'd be at

best case scenario: he hasn't found the note and your friendship with him is still very much in tact

worst case scenario: he found the note and is currently reading it at this point in time and your friendship with him is starting to crumble but you still have a chance to swoop in and pick up the pieces

the absolutely worst case ever in the entire world scenario: he's found the note, he's read the note, he's processed the note, and your friendship with him has been completely annihilated and now he's planning to change his name and leave the country so that he doesn't have to confront you about it

you use your shoulder to shove the doors open before bursting out into the open air, ignoring the concerned glances you're starting to receive from your obviously frazzled state

"oh god, oh god, oh god-!" your backpack flops wildly against your back as you rush down the narrow brick steps leading towards the main boulevard

realistically, jungkook's probably found and read the note, so all you have to do is come up with a short monologue about how all of it was fake and that the note was just a sick, twisted prank of some kind

i know that the note makes it seem like i'm telling you that i'm in love with you, but that's not the truth at all!

"woah, watch it-!"

you accidentally knock into someone's shoulder while sprinting down the lane and you turn around for a second just to hold a hand out while flashing the stranger a sheepish smile

"sorry! so sorry-" you turn back around, reaching up to keep your glasses secured on the top of your head as you continue to sprint, your sneakers slapping down against the pavement

as you read in the note, i made a point about how since we're friends, we should be honest with each other... and honestly, there are nothing but lies in the note! and there's a lesson in that, you know? words can be full of lies but we, as human beings, should be full of truths-

"nope, hate that-" you shake your head and immediately scrunch up that mental piece of paper before tossing it into your brain's garbage bin

you'd sound like an obnoxious philosophy student if you hit him with that explanation

it was a prank! i want to start a prank war with you and this is how i'm kicking things off!

that... that could work, right?

that's not bad!

just tell him that you wanted to start a prank war with him so you decided to go big or go home with an i love you, best friend note to see how he would react!

"so stupid-" you mutter to yourself, slowing down to a jog as you approach the doors to the library, "so, so stupid-"

the Super Epic Prank War ROFL XD™ explanation isn't the greatest excuse but it's the best you can do on such short notice

thankfully, it doesn't take you very long to track down jungkook considering the fact he always sits in the same area every time the two of you come here

your feet come to a screeching halt the moment you spot him and you quickly step to the side to hide behind the wall

you slowly lean over a little to peek at him

he has his headphones on and he's busy typing away at his laptop and you can tell he's concentrating really hard because he has that cute frown on his face and occasionally he'll mutter something to himself

jungkook in intense focus mode is something you find to be very endearing :-)

...

you quickly shake your head to snap yourself out of your daze before focusing on jungkook's face again

he certainly doesn't look like he just read an explosive love letter...

hm

you could still be safe!

...for now, that is.

"okay, y/n-" you stand up straight and let out a breath, giving yourself a mental pat on the head in an effort to calm your nerves, "better sooner than later, right? just- you just have to rip it off like a bandaid-"

your anxiety seems to build with every step that brings you closer to jungkook and you can almost hear the jaws theme song playing all around you

da-dum

jungkook, i swear i have a perfectly logical explanation for this...

da-dum

i know the note does a very convincing job of making it seem like i'm in love with you, but that couldn't be farther from the truth!

da-dum, da-dum

consider this your initiation into our very serious prank war, my friend!

dadumdadumdumdumbdumbdumbthisissuchadumbdumbidea-

"hi!" you greet a little too enthusiastically, trying your best not to make it seem like you just sprinted across campus to get to him even though you very clearly did

"sorry, seat's reserv- y/n?" jungkook looks up from his laptop before frowning, quickly glancing back down at his screen to check the time as he pulls his headphones off to hang around his neck, "aren't you- didn't your class end, like, literally a minute ago? why are you so- did you run here??" he asks incredulously, getting up from his seat as his brows knit together in concern

"no, no! of course i didn't run here, silly- oh, god, give me a sec-" you wheeze, bending down and gripping onto the back of the wooden chair in front of you as you try to catch your breath, your chest still falling and rising at a concerning pace from the physical stress of sprinting and the mental stress of the current situation, "it was more of a- of a brisk walk, if you think about it- jesus, i think i'm gonna throw up-"

"okay, you need to drink some water- come and sit next to me-" jungkook reaches out to help lead you around the table towards him, "god, i don't know why you thought you had to run over, it's not like i was planning on going anywhere-"

"i'm fine, kook, it's fine-"

"you're, like, literally radiating heat," jungkook turns you around and pulls your bag off your back before pulling out a chair and helping you into it, "and your face is all red!" he frowns, setting your bag down on the table and unzipping it to pull out your water bottle

"my face is always this red!" you force out a casual laugh, waving your hand to dismiss him as you lean back against the seat, "i'm fine, it's fine-"

"shut up and take a sip-" jungkook untwists the cap of your water bottle before shoving it into your hands and gently lifting it up towards your mouth, his head tilting up a little so he can check and see if you're actually drinking anything, "c'mon, hydrate yourself-"

you swallow a couple gulps of water before pulling the bottle away and reaching up to wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, "god, i love water-"

"yeah, i bet." jungkook chuckles, visibly more relieved now that he knows you won't be passing out from exhaustion anytime soon

as you put your water bottle away, your eyes lower towards jungkook's backpack slouching against the leg of his chair and almost immediately the anxiety that you thought you'd just swallowed down bubbles right back up

"so, are you going to tell me why you're acting like the cops are after you?" jungkook jokes, taking his seat before pulling his headphones off and setting them down next to his laptop

"i just, um-" you press your lips together as you slowly start to lean down, stretching your arm out towards the pocket, "i just wanted to see you, buddy!"

"i don't believe that for a second." jungkook snorts, turning to look at you

you shoot straight back up and pull your arm up and behind your head as if you're in the middle of a good stretch, "hey, what's with that tone? it's not a crime for me to want to see you-"

"you saw me at lunch! and that was only like an hour and a half ago-" jungkook turns his head to look back at his screen and you quickly revert back to your mission impossible secret agent mode

the forced smile drops from your face and you lean back down, your fingers blindly feeling for the cool metal of the zipper

"you know, you actually came at just the right time-" jungkook speaks up again and you pause just in case you need to pull away from his bag, but he makes no move to turn and look at you, "ji-eun was about to leave for her class but now you can meet her before she goes off!"

"uh-huh..." your tongue pokes out in concentration as you unzip the pocket in one swift movement, immediately sticking your hand in and feeling around for the balled-up piece of paper, "sounds gre-"

hold on, what did he just say?

you shoot back up

"did you just-" you choke and reach up to pat your chest gently, "i'm sorry, did you just say that ji-eun was here?"

"uh-huh!" jungkook nods, "i didn't know she had a spare at the same time as i did so i was surprised when she came over to say hi- it turns out our schedules are, like, sort of similar which oddly makes me kind of happy-"

it's at that moment that you notice the cherry-patterned tote bag slumped in the chair sitting across from you and you let out a nervous chuckle as you shift in your seat, "great! great, that's so- great, it's great that i'm meeting ji-eun today, out of all days..." you trail off, glancing around warily as you try to come up with some kind of an exit strategy

you're just really not in the mood to meet the love of jungkook's life today

you've already been hit with so many blows and it's only two in the afternoon-

"sorry that took so long! i couldn't find a bin but i bumped into my friends and they said they'd throw it out for me-"

oh, you have got to be kidding me.

your eyes widen in mild panic upon immediately recognizing ji-eun to be the girl who had overheard your entire monologue in the bathroom earlier today — and from the way her eyes flicker, it seems as though she remembers exactly who you are as well

"oh, no worries!" jungkook beams at ji-eun before pointing to you with his thumb, "this is my friend, by the way. the one i was talking about earlier! y/n, this is ji-eun."

you stay quiet as you continue staring up at ji-eun, your mind racing a mile a minute as you consider your current options

you can pretend like you've never met her before or you can make things awkward by telling jungkook that you met her today after she'd emptied her bladder

"...y/n?" jungkook lowers his voice, nudging you with his elbow before letting out a nervous chuckle, "please say something."

"i- yes, hello!" you blurt out, the feet of your chair scraping against the rough carpet as you get up from your seat to stick your hand out towards ji-eun, "it's- ah- it's- it's so nice to meet you! i'm y/n."

ji-eun stays quiet for a second before her lips turn up in a polite smile and she reaches towards you, gently taking your outstretched hand in hers (for the record, her hands are shockingly soft and supple), "it's lovely to meet you... as well, y/n. i love your glasses!"

you can't help but notice the immediate warmth that seems to surround ji-eun and suddenly it makes a lot more sense as to why jungkook's attracted to her

you're about as comforting as stepping into a puddle of water while wearing socks

you feel a slight sense of relief seeing that ji-eun is playing along but your new concern is whether or not she's connected the dots that your monologue in the bathroom was dedicated to jungkook

you didn't actually say his name when you were talking out loud, so you might be able to get away with this...

"oh, these old things?" you reach up to feel the glasses sitting on top of your head before flicking your hand at her, "i bought them on amazon. they're blue-light glasses- i can totally send you the link if you want."

"that would actually be great!" she gasps, nodding enthusiastically, "i desperately need a pair of blue-light glasses- seriously, i stared at my laptop screen for, like, ten hours straight today and i really feel like they're about to roll out of my head-"

"oh my god, don't even get me started. at this point it'd probably feel better to rip them right out of their sockets-"

"ji-eun, you ready?"

"let's gooo, i wanna get an iced coffee before we head off to class."

you and ji-eun don't get a chance to continue bonding over the pain of sore eyes when you're suddenly interrupted by two new voices

you look up to see two guys approaching the table and you subtly push your seat back a bit as you prepare yourself to say hello again

"oh! yeah, i'm ready, sorry-" ji-eun gestures towards you with a smile, "this is- this is jungkook's friend, by the way. y/n, these are my friends."

"hi, hello-" you get up from your seat again to stick your hand out, offering the two (very handsome, might you add) strangers a friendly smile, "i'm y/n, jungkook's friend- but you- you already knew that because that's what ji-eun just said-"

"i'm taehyung! you can call me tae-" the corners of taehyung's mouth immediately raise in a bright grin and he gives your hand a firm shake before nodding next to him, "and this is jimin!"

"hi..." you trail off, turning to give jimin a handshake as well, "so nice to meet you!"

"oh, i just- i actually just washed my hands, so-" jimin chuckles, looking down at your hand before taking a small step back, "but it's nice to meet you... jungkook's friend."

ooh

is it just you or did it suddenly get a little icy in here?

"oh, no problem! um, yeah, you too." you pull your hand back before swallowing nervously and forcing the polite smile back on your face, "i like your jacket, by the way! it looks really cool."

maybe it's because he's wearing giant sunglasses indoors but you can't help but feel slightly intimidated by jimin

you can't see his eyes but you can certainly feel them on you and you're definitely getting the vibe that jimin is already not the biggest fan of you for some weird reason

"thank you." he responds curtly, smoothing a hand over the leather before looking down at ji-eun, "so can we go now?"

"mhm!" ji-eun gets up from her chair before pushing it back into place, pulling her tote back up onto her shoulder before flashing a sweet smile at jungkook, "see you later, alligator."

"in a while, crocodile!" jungkook responds enthusiastically, watching with twinkly eyes as she turns and heads off towards the exit with jimin and taehyung glued at either side of her

god

she even walks prettily

and you were literally clomping down the boulevard like a feral caveman a second ago

you wait until they've disappeared to turn and face jungkook with a raised eyebrow, "...jimin was kind of a bitch."

"hey, play nice!" jungkook frowns, reaching over to give your arm a gentle whack, "he's a fashion major! ji-eun says being snooty is part of the degree requirements-" he grins, shaking his head slightly before leaning back against his chair, "she's, like, super funny."

"mm." you hum, still feeling a little uneasy about your interaction with jimin

you just hate it when first meetings don't go well and that first meeting definitely wasn't super great

but it wasn't like you did anything wrong, right?

you were great!

snooty jimin was the one who was being rude

whatever

hopefully you won't have to hang out with him too often if jungkook and ji-eun become an item

maybe you can just stick with taehyung!

he seems to be a lot friendlier

"oh, by the way, i-" you're suddenly reminded of your main mission and you turn to point down at jungkook's bag, "it's not a big deal, but i- i accidentally shoved something in your bag earlier and- could i just get it back from you?"

"you did?" jungkook frowns, leaning down to pick his bag up before unzipping it all the way and pulling both flaps open, "what was it?"

"it was- uh- just some notes on a scrap piece of paper!" you immediately feel the weight lift from your shoulders at jungkook's cluelessness to the situation, "i put it in the right side pocket-"

"wait, are you talking about, like, a balled up thing of paper?" jungkook pauses before looking up at you with wide eyes, "oh, shit- was it important??"

"um, i wouldn't call it important-" you snort, shaking your head, "is it not there? i swore it was in the right side pocket-"

"no, no, it was there! it was there, i just- ji-eun needed to spit her gum out and i thought it was one of my scrap pieces of paper-" jungkook winces, grabbing his phone and unlocking it with fumbling fingers, "i'm so sorry, y/n- let me text ji-eun and ask her which garbage can she threw it into and i can go dig it out-"

"no, no, it's okay!" you nearly let out a screech of delight knowing that your note now has a slobbery wad of gum in it and is living at the bottom of a trash can, "it's fine, i just- they were just boring notes for something. i just wanted to see if i had really shoved it into your bag or not."

"oh, okay-" jungkook's shoulders immediately slump and he sets his phone down on the table, "you're sure it wasn't important?"

"100%." you hold both hands out with a chuckle, "i needed to throw it out anyway so i guess ji-eun actually did me a favour-"

"okay, phew." jungkook sighs, zipping his bag back up and plopping it back down on the ground next to his feet, "anyways- i'm actually glad you're here because now you can help me plan out my date! i was working on it but then ji-eun came and obviously i couldn't have that google doc open in front of her-" he turns his laptop to show you all of his hard work with a grin, "check it out! i have a list of things i need to buy, i have outfit ideas, i even went on pinterest for inspiration-"

"wow, kook-" your eyes bulge out for a second at the sight of the extensive and shockingly organized google doc before you reach over to pull his laptop closer towards you, "i... i really don't think i've ever seen you... even make a google doc before-"

he even has the sunset time written down for the date

why would he need to know what time the sun is setting??

"i have everything planned for next week." jungkook pulls his laptop back to him as you settle back against your seat, "i already emailed my landlord to ask if i would even be allowed to hang out on the rooftop and he said it would be fine! he also reminded me to keep a brick wedged between the door so that i don't lock us up on the rooftop-"

"so you're definitely going with the rooftop picnic, then?"

"oh, i'm actually changing it to a rooftop dinner instead of a picnic." jungkook shakes his head before giving you a half-hearted shrug, "i think a picnic is cute but i really wanna try to impress her, y'know? i ordered this thing on amazon just now- basically, it's a medium-sized inflatable bubble tent! the description says it's perfect for two people and- i'm gonna, like-" he pauses and looks away from his screen towards you with a smile, "well, you know, i'm gonna do what you said and i'm gonna stuff it full of blankets and pillows and... hopefully i can string up fairy lights and stuff on the inside... so that after the date we can go in there and just talk and not have to worry about getting attacked by mosquitos!"

"wow, that's-" you cross your arms over your chest before leaning back and looking up towards the ceiling, "huh. that's actually a cute idea, kook. i wouldn't have been able to come up with something like that. i didn't even know transparent tents existed."

"i know." jungkook gives you a smug little smile before bursting into a grin, "but yeah, that's it! all we have to do is go and pick up all the supplies and stuff."

"we?" you frown, looking back down at jungkook, "i... wasn't aware i was part of this plan..."

"what? of course you are!" jungkook snorts, looking at you as if a third eye just sprouted from your forehead, "obviously you have to help me-"

"well, i just don't know if that's-" you chuckle uneasily as you rub the back of your neck, "i really- i don't wanna get in your way, you know? maybe you should- maybe you should just take care of all of this yourself! i mean, you basically planned everything already-"

"what? but- but you're my-" jungkook deflates and you instantly feel bad upon seeing his eyes suddenly turn sad, "okay..."

you press your lips together and wait for him to say something else but the next few seconds are filled with nothing but awkward silence and the faint buzzing of the fluorescent lights hanging above you

you'd jump off a cliff if jungkook asked you to but helping him prepare and set up his date is something that you,.., definitely would not enjoy.,.,

but then again, this isn't about you, is it?

this is about jungkook, your friend, and he needs your help to set up this very important date that-

oh, damnit.

"i'm-" you clear your throat as you sit up in your seat, reaching over to give jungkook's hand a pat, "no, of course i'll help, kook. i just thought that- well, this date seems so important to you that i thought you wanted to take care of all the details yourself!"

the bright smile immediately returns to jungkook's face and you resist the urge to call him out on so blatantly guilt-tripping you like that-

"yes! you're the best!"

"i know."

»»————- 🖤 ————-««

although you and jungkook are practically inseparable on campus (and some would say it might be healthy for the two of you to give each other a little bit of space) — you don't think you'll ever say no to hanging out with him downtown

of course, hanging out with jungkook downtown would be a lot more fun if it weren't for the fact that the two of you have basically spent the entire day shopping for all the things he needs for his date

and if it weren't for the fact that he paid for lunch and treated you to a cake pop and a venti-sized iced coffee, you would probably be livid about having to carry everything for him because you really feel like your arms are about to pop right off in about two seconds

fancy cutlery, porcelain plates, fluffy throw pillows, a giant blanket, fairy lights... at this point he might as well buy an entire house for ji-eun

and look, you know you probably sound bitter and that-should-be-me about this whole situation, but that couldn't be farther from the truth!

it's just that listening to someone you like gushing about the person that they like for an entire day while you're carrying bags full of things for their date can get a little mentally and physically exhausting so if you're grouchy right now it's really not your fault

"i think we might have to call an uber back to your place, jungkook-" you mutter, adjusting the hefty tote bag over your shoulder with a grunt as you trail behind him on the sidewalk, "bringing all of this on the bus is going to piss people off-"

you stumble over your feet a little when the bag in your right hand knocks into a garbage can and you curse to yourself while resisting the urge to kick the damn thing over

"okay, grumpy, we'll call an uber home-" jungkook spins around with a smile before raising the notepad in his hand and tapping against it with his pen, "i just have one more thing i have to take care of and then we can go!"

"okay, well-" you set the bags down onto the ground with a fwump! before rubbing your sore palms together, "what else do you have to get?"

jungkook offered to help carry a couple of things but you insisted that you'd take it all and that he should just focus on ticking off all of the items on his list

you wince at the sight of the pinkish-red imprints now embedded into your palms from the straps of the bags

obviously you've now come to regret your generous offer

"flowers!" jungkook chirps, using his pen to point to the flower shop a couple of shops down, "i have to greet ji-eun with a bouquet of flowers as pretty as she is-"

"yeah, i understand-" you adjust the two bags on both shoulders before bending down to pick up the other two on the ground, "also, i'm not a genius or anything but i'm pretty sure the flowers aren't going to survive until the date if you buy them now-"

"duh, obviously not- i'm going to place an order now and then pick them up on the day of the date!" jungkook tsks, waiting for you to join his side before he begins walking towards the flower shop, "thanks for doing all of this for me, by the way. you really are the best." he hums, hurrying over to open the door for you

"i... yeah, of course, kook." you feel yourself soften slightly as soon as you see the sweet little smile on his face and you quickly scold yourself in your head for being so curt with him all day, "that's what friends are for, right?"

"mhm!" jungkook slaps his hands down on your shoulders from behind before giving them a squeeze, "and i am so letting you choose whatever you want for dinner tonight-"

"hello!"

"oh, jesus-" you and jungkook are immediately greeted by an overenthusiastic employee as soon as you step into the shop and you honestly probably would've knocked him out with one of your shopping bags if they weren't so heavy-

"are you two looking for anything in particular?" he smiles kindly before gesturing towards the large selection of flowers all around you, "we have flowers of all kinds! roses, tulips, lilies- i can even show you flowers from our new tropical selection-"

"actually-" jungkook nudges you aside before glancing down at the employee's nametag, "seokjin, i'd like to place an order for a custom bouquet, if that's okay."

"ah, a custom bouquet!" seokjin claps his hands and rubs them together enticingly, "what are you celebrating? i need to know so that i can help pick out the perfect flowers for your bouquet."

"well, i don't know if it's a celebration-" jungkook chuckles, his cheeks pinking slightly as he reaches up to rub the back of his neck, "it's for a first date."

"a first date!!" seokjin gasps excitedly before turning his head to look at you, "you must be so-"

"-oh, not for me!" you let out a laugh before shaking your head quickly, "it's- it's definitely not for me. i'm just here to provide moral support and-" you lift one of the bags to show him, "muscular support."

"ah, i see... okay, well- why don't i take you around and introduce you to the different candidates you could consider for your bouquet?" seokjin turns back to look at jungkook, "each flower you choose will be very important in showing your future lover how much you care about them-" he pauses when he notices you hovering behind jungkook and he leans over a little with a bright smile, "why don't you go and wait by the front counter, darling? you can put everything down there and take a little break. there's some cucumber water and fresh puff pastry apple roses up at the front if you're interested!"

"well, i can't say no to free food." you snort, nodding before turning to head towards the front counter, "i'll just wait for you over there, then..."

you nearly let out a moan of relief as soon as you set all the bags down and you twist your upper body to the right and to the left until you feel the a satisfying pop! of your spine cracking back in place

your body was not made to carry heavy things

in fact, you'd like to argue that your body was made to lie down and do nothing

you take a seat on the wooden stool before turning to look at the apple roses sitting prettily in the display case and you almost feel like you shouldn't touch them even though seokjin offered them to you

even the pitcher of cucumber water looks too nice to touch

this place is awfully fancy

you didn't even know flower shops could be this fancy

you prop both elbows up on the counter before leaning back comfortably, your eyes lazily scanning around the store

"$15 for a single rose?" you gawk at the little wooden sign poking out from a large bouquet of neatly wrapped long-stem roses before making a face, "god."

you can't even imagine how much a custom bouquet is going to cost if a single rose is fifteen bucks

"-also write a note for you and attach it to the bouquet, if you're interested in that. it'll be an additional five dollars, but we handwrite it on the highest quality card stock with the most beautiful calligraphy and we even spray it with perfume-"

you perk up when you hear seokjin's voice and you look to see him and jungkook coming over to you

you have to admit that seokjin is great at his job because he's doing a good job at milking every dollar out of jungkook-

"yeah, that would be great!" jungkook nods enthusiastically, pulling his backpack off before unzipping it to grab his wallet, "i think a small note might be cute-"

"oh, that reminds me!" seokjin stops in his tracks right as he's about to lift the wooden slab to get behind the counter, "would you be interested in purchasing a teddy bear as well? if you add a teddy bear to your order, i'll give you a slight discount on the flowers."

"ooh, a discount!" jungkook gasps and you turn your head slightly so seokjin won't see you rolling your eyes at how much he's forcing jungkook to buy

you respect the hustle but this is too much

"where are the teddy bears?"

"right by the flowers!" seokjin smiles, wrapping an arm around jungkook's shoulders and spinning him around, "we can round back and take a look-"

"okay, i think i have to cut in here-" you chuckle, reaching out and grabbing the back of jungkook's elbow, "you don't- you don't think a bouquet of flowers and a teddy bear is a little too much for a first date?" you clear your throat quietly before offering a shrug, "i feel like that's just... a lot, kook. i mean, i would be overwhelmed if-"

"well, i guess it's a good thing i'm not taking you out on a date then, right?" jungkook teases, wiggling his arm out of your grip before turning back to look at seokjin, "onward to the bears, my good man!"

ouch

"yeah." you can't help but frown as jungkook and seokjin head back towards the flowers, "thanks for the reminder."

"that's gotta hurt."

"god-" you jump at the sudden appearance of an employee standing behind the counter and you place a hand over your chest before letting out a breath, "you scared me!"

"sorry." he shrugs, "we polished the floors this morning so my shoes are making, like, no noise."

"oh."

a moment of silence passes while you turn to face away from him again, but all of a sudden-

"so he really can't tell that you like him, huh?"

"you-" you immediately straighten up and your head spins around so fast that you're surprised you didn't complete decapitate yourself, "excuse me??"

"what? it's obvious." the employee snorts, spraying cleaner onto the counter before reaching up to yank the tattered rag off his shoulder, "it's painfully obvious, actually-"

you can feel your entire face starting to go red as this complete stranger continues to rip you a new one and you hold a hand out to shut him up, "no offense, but i-i don't think this is any of your business, sir-"

"it's yoongi." yoongi looks down at his apron for a second before frowning, "huh. i forgot to put my dumb name tag on again-"

"well, yoongi-" you place emphasis on his name in an effort to intimidate him and make him go away, "you don't know what you're talking about and i suggest you mind your own business-"

"you should tell him before it's too late." yoongi doesn't seem to be all that affected by your biting tone and you roll your eyes at the way he rounds back to the topic

"what are you even talking about?"

"well, i assume you're going to be his best man at his wedding. from the way it's looking, you're certainly not going to be the bride," yoongi purses his lips as he folds up the rag into a neat little square, "you don't wanna wait until you're fixing his tie at the wedding to tell him that you love him."

"what makes you think i lo-" you cut yourself off quickly before that word slips out of your mouth, "like him?"

"if you didn't, you wouldn't be here right now." yoongi points out with a tilt of his head, "and from how smudgy your eyeliner is, it looks like you've been working hard all day."

your jaw drops slightly and you can't help but scoff

the nerve of this guy!

"who do you think you are?!"

"i'm yoongi." yoongi raises a brow, "i told you that like a second ago- wow, you are not a good listener-"

"do you usually do this with all of the customers who come here?" you interrupt, crossing your arms defensively before leaning in slightly, "you're awfully nosy-"

"i only do this with the ones that seem to have something juicy going on." yoongi hums, leaning down to put the spray bottle of cleaner under the counter, "this is a flower shop. the most exciting part of my day is watching a bumblebee choose which flower to land on."

"well, nothing juicy is going on here so-" you twist back around before sticking your nose up in the air slightly, "sorry to disappoint."

"alright, fair enough." yoongi nods to himself, letting out a sigh as he slowly backs away from the counter, "i guess i'll just leave you to... wallow in self-pity... and continue staring at your friend with cartoon hearts floating around your head-"

"'you should tell him before it's too late-'" you swivel around and slap both your palms down on the counter, "why would you- why would even say something like that?! i can't tell him. are you insane?!"

a smirk twitches at the corner of yoongi's mouth at your sudden confession and he lets out a sigh before stepping back up towards you, "and why can't you tell him?"

"because- i just can't! he's-" you clear your throat before leaning in and lowering your voice, "he's literally taking someone else out on a date- we're here to buy flowers for his date-"

"so what?" yoongi interrupts, "it's just a date. it's not like you're stopping his wedding."

"so what? because he doesn't like me back, so what's the point?" you hiss, resisting the urge to reach over and smack some common sense into this very nosy and very stubborn stranger, "this isn't a romantic comedy- and even if it was, i'm very obviously not the main character-"

"you don't know that he doesn't like you back."

...

well now he's just toying with you

"i... i can't tell if you're kidding or not-"

"do i look like i'm kidding?" yoongi asks, pointing to his poker face before shaking his head, "you don't know that he doesn't like you back. you've obviously never asked him."

"oh, please." you scoff, turning around to lean back against the counter again, "trust me, i know it."

"well, did he ever explicitly say that he didn't like you?" yoongi leans over to peek at jungkook over your shoulder, "do you have a definitive answer to this particular question?"

"no, but he doesn't have to... we're just friends." you frown, your eyes wandering over to the back of jungkook's head, "he doesn't like me. i know he doesn't. we're just friends."

we're just friends.

(saying it out loud is a lot more depressing than you thought it'd be.)

"well, maybe the reason why you're just friends is because the two of you won't allow yourselves to be more than that," yoongi suggests, your head tilting to the side slightly as you force yourself to consider his surprisingly wise words, "it's obvious that you have a solid friendship so it would suck if a relationship ruined that- so maybe he does like you and is only asking someone else out to try to force himself not to like you..."

you feel your heart skip a beat when jungkook turns to glance at you over his shoulder with a soft smile while seokjin continues rattling off about the vast choice of teddy bears available for purchase

you bite back a giggle when he mouths a desperate 'help' at you before raising his hand and twirling his finger next to his head to tell you that seokjin is fully crazy

"...so i guess what i'm trying to say is that you're never really going to know how he feels about you if you don't ask him," you tune back in to the end of yoongi's little speech and you turn your head slightly to glance back at him, "but what do i know, right? i just polish counters at high-end flower shops."

🎙️tell jungkook he's being an idiot or tell y/n to get a backbone (send in an ask!)

✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here? (full fics!)

💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles and mini series like smitten!)

🌟or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!)

[song-of-the-rune]

Okay I have so little time to write this week T_T but!

brainstorming/jotting down thoughts on what would happen if I dumped all the aros into the same room. I still need to come up with a premise because barely any of them are from the same universe.

Also, now I kinda want to make shitty valentines from each of them. you (general) know the shitposty ones i'm talking about. but i'm getting on a tangent here.

Xilthraxia & Gregory would immediately start causing problems. Someone is going to end up dead I am not joking. They would literally build an actual bomb, because between them they'd have the will, the idea, and the know-how. Hell maybe I'll write someone trying to set them up on a blind date and it somehow turns into them building a fucking bomb instead idk. This is why we can't have nice things.

Xylluna & Kairos: I think if you put these two in a room without anyone either of them knew, they'd. ehem. manage to locate each other. and not be seen the rest of the night. If I'm being honest with myself about it.

Xylluna: Probably put this little palentine's thing together in the first place, whatever it entails. At the very least, they made chocolate for everyone. (Sorry Luke.) If they see bomb club they get concerned simultaneously about 1. why this is happening but 2. why it's being made so inefficiently. If this happens I'm obligated to give their bestie Nero a cameo.

Firaga: wait hold on he's in the bomb club. if there was an explosive he'd be involved. He and gregory'd talk a ton about fireball because it's the best spell. something will burn down if they're left unattended. But he'd at least have the foresight to prevent club bomb from setting off said bomb indoors. get a nice blasting range somewhere if you're gonna do that.

All that said I haven't really decided on whether Firaga'd consider himself aro? I think he'd have considered himself aroace before... character whose name i've already forgotten. But honestly that was during a really confusing time for him (right after finding out the world was ending, and also after being killed+reincarnated), and so he could've easily misidentified "this is a person I can confide in right now" for "i'm attracted to this person." So for now I'm counting him.

On another note. Firaga LOVES chocolate and therefore loves valentine's day. But he will openly admit he just showed up for the chocolate.

Luke: Well. Man. There's a whole slew of options here. This is so situation-dependent. I'm going to assume he gets dropped in in hybrid form, since that's the most natural to him. So he'd probably be relieved that... half these people don't know what a werewolf is, or else they just don't seem to care? Also, these snacks are just... free? he can just have them? wild. He'd get along pretty well with everyone, honestly, although he'd be pretty shy about talking to anyone at first.

Wildclaw: "HOLY SHIT THERE IS A DRAGON MAN. THOSE EXIST? I AM A DRAGON TOO YOU JUST CAN'T TELL COME HERE." (Nah, that's the internal monologue but she knows how to be respectful.) Might end up in a drinking contest with Luke. Trying to understand what a bomb is at first (from a lower-magic/tech setting than bomb crew), then is trying to prevent the construction of said bomb.

Kairos: Very used to the whole valentine's thing, assuming that exists where he's from, but trying to just have innocent (ignore whatever's happening in the background) fun might be an interesting change of pace for him. That said ,he's going to be on-edge the entire time because parties, while he's very practiced at them, stress him out. At least he wasn't hired to assassinate anyone at this one.

It's valentines day and i feel like i should write SOMETHING but i can't think of anything honestly? I have all these ocs and none of them feel like particularly good subjects for it. Let's see we got for oc options:

Xiltharian/Moonlight: Rarely write for them. Their marriage was more because it was the normal thing to do than anything else.

Xilthraxia: lol. No.

Gregory: oh yeah. I haven't told you guys about Gregory. His one true love is being a bandit wizard.

Xylluna: aro

Firaga: asked one person out once. Got rejected. Has not thought about it again.

Kaz/Rikky: Already written about them a lot and I don't really feel like writing more angst right now. Actually though -- they're poly so maybe I can write something else with one (or both) of them? Or something short- term one of them had in the past? I'll have to think of other pairings do you think my fiance would mind if i just. Borrowed his character. For a little private thing for myself. Heehee. Still, though, doesn't solve the issue of having something to share.

Iyo/Eshrie: I have something in the works but I want it to be GOOD not rushed out for valentines. Also probably not something I'd share.

Luke: aro, maybe aroace, haven't decided, either way not a likely choice.

Wildclaw: aroace. Interested in dragons but not like your annoying bard friend is. (no wait for real did i actually do that by accident wtf)

Kairos: don't know him well enough yet, probably aro though. He's flirty but I can't see him in a scenario I'd want to write and share

Chrysalis: Idk I don't really write him, and I'm not sure I have interest in writing him, i like jotting down details but not writing scenes for him.

Maybe some fun AU with a bunch of them doing some kind of friends thing? Like galentines type thing. Which i have never done so idk what that looks like.

Or probably nothing! Just kinda thinking aloud here.

[sennqu]

i would really like to know what part of vol2 was a masterpiece beyond it looking and sounding slick and cool.

first off. the Vecna reveal as the big bad behind everything when nothing in the previous seasons even hinted that he and his family existed? Those murders would have become a town urban legend in no time!! Especially since it only happened 30 years ago?? And as evidenced by the writers keeping in the line "the murder house" when Jason and co. talked about it, other townspeople beyond Eddie's uncle did know about the Creels so why did none of the other born and bred main characters ever know this?? This reveal was an ass-pull of a retcon plain and simple.

Max ending up in the coma?? Completely diminishes the Dear Billy scene. Oh, music and human connection saves you from despair?? SIKE! actually it doesn't because we really just wanted to use this Kate Bush song for style points. Trauma does actually get you in the end wdym? then they used the song again, for what I don't fucking know, but certainly not for thematic reasons. Timing the lyrics to come back just as Robin throws the molotov?? ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS. And also we get to El to "revive" Max because El really is just that special. No one would know what to do without her!

Not even going to get into that indulgent close-up of El's feet.

Not even going to get into posing dead Brenner like Jesus on the fucking cross.

Lucas' speech ending with "normal is just a raging psychopath". Really?? Really?? Was this supposed to be a shot at Jason? The same guy who, upon seeing Max - a stranger to him- immediately tried to rescue her?? I will die on the hill that S4 accidentally created a compelling antagonist in Jason and just never fucking knew it. (i've cooled down on my thoughts with this one. still think the line was stupid as hell though and that jason was a lot more compelling than vecna)

Eddie dying for no reason, plot-wise or narrative-wise?? WHY? So he could die a hero? BITCH HE COULD HAVE LIVED AS A HERO. I didn't care for Eddie all that much but he should have died right after his guitar solo if he was already marked for death. at least that would have been cool instead of stretching it out like what happened

Not even going to get into how Steven, Nancy, and Robin were choking for what seemed like an hour or longer. Pacing was off the entire 4-hour runtime but that especially seemed egregious.

The El and Hopper reunion feeling like an afterthought?? It was so emotionally dull. They might as well have made them reunite at the start of S5. El going "I always believed you were alive" BENCH WHERE. YOU LITERALLY CREATED A SCHOOL PRESENTATION TO HONOR HIM AS A DEAD HERO. This one actually got to me the most because I live for loving father and daughter dynamics and I was rooting for them to reunite but what we got.... it fell so, so flat.

The entire two day timeskip in the first place. Absolutely abhorrent. Completely cutting into the climax, completely removing the falling action.

Hopper fucking beheading a Democreature in slow-mo. The entire Russia story arc was already very heightened but you know what. yeah sure why not. WHY THE FUCK NOT

Mike's monologue about loving El even when she's not a superhero when she is literally doing superheroism right in front of him. Mike straight up saying with his full chest that his life started the day after Will went missing. Will who is next to him as he's fucking saying this shit. Will who has done nothing else this season except to help mend his relationship with El.

Robin seeing Vickie again at a fucking weapons emporium. WHAT FOR? They didn't even rationalize this with a throwaway line that maybe she and her (ex) boyfriend were going hunting or whatever. Literally just did this so we can see Robin upset. Because really? We could have that scene in the gym WITHOUT THE WAR ZONE SCENE.

Whatever the fuck they did to Steve "oh actually I wanna have six kids" Harrington.

Will not even getting the dignity of saying his feelings. Was a simple last longing look at Mike as he says, " I really am stupid for falling for him, huh, Jonathan?" Too Fucking Hard? No need to say Mike's name, no need to say the word GAY (calling him a fag or a queer or a fairy was fucking fine though) to make it clear as day where Will stood. it could have been done so easily with how they set up the Jonathan and Will scene. And now we have to contend with people arguing that maybe he really wasn't in love with Mike at all or the even stupider take that maybe Will was actually in love with Eleven.

Brenner getting shot multiple times was actually very cathartic and I'm glad El left him to rot. But again this just comes back to why is El's storyline the only one handled with this much grace and understanding for her agency?

The Russia storyline just fucking ending with them being able to cross country borders no problem??? and no sign of Dmitry or Yuri at all?? Fucking sloppy.

Mike just... existing as El's cheerleader now apparently?? What the hell happened to him. They couldn't even make him a malewife right because he had to have Will push him into his monologue.

Speaking of monologues, fucking Henry got pages and pages of the most uninspired villain script I've ever had the misfortune of hearing in this year of 2022. Yeah yeah we live in a society. yeah yeah El is actually just so special she even created her own super villain what else is new.

S4 Volume 2 was a total let down and I am not going to be blinded by the beautiful cinematography into saying it was better than it is, than what it could have been. All style, no substance.

And as redditor timlest said it best: