It just sucks so bad. 21, the age at which i realized i was trans, isnt at all "too late" to realize, but it sucks so bad what our society, what the institution of transphobia, gets away with. The lie it forced on me for so long. I feel like i had so many moments when i could have easily realized i was trans as far back as about five years old when i saw something on the news about a trans girl and at the same time i was having thoughts like "What if reincarnation was real but you had to be a boy every time and could never be born as a girl?? Wouldnt that suuuuuck???", but they want you to think it could never be you. And it worked on me!!! Between my family and our society, i was conditioned to think that while it was totally Okay for somebody to be trans, it could Never be me, and i shouldnt even think about it unless i was 100% sure since birth- which, on some level, i believe i even was! But what they Want you to believe is that all trans people know without a doubt that theyre trans from birth, a lie which suppresses so many transgender people out of ever being happy. When i was in my teens i even had two friends who came out as transfem, and i was really happy for them, but even more, i was jealous. I wished i could be trans so that i could be as happy as they were! I wished i could experience that! But it just never clicked for me that i could easily have that just as easily as them. It was all about overcoming this feeling that society instills in you, that it could never be you. And the fact that even well meaning people perpetuate these sentiments is appalling. When my dad was accepting of me but also made sure to ask me How Sure I Was, he was himself a microcosm of what society worries itself with foremost- Are You Sure You're Trans? Have you wrung out every other possibility? Are you sure youll make it? They busy you with doubts and fears, because ultimately they of course want to dupe you out of it. They express possibly genuine and well meaning concern for your wellbeing and happiness without letting you make up your own mind. Railroading you into the mindset that if it was You, you would have realized long ago.
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Happy anniversary to The Grand Galloping 20s! Hard to believe it's been a whole year since I started Tulli and I's MLP 1920s AU.
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some sam & max art from this week
go-karting • popsicles • peanut butter (celebrating dog day)
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it's hand appreciation hours
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mediocre disney property that had potential but was ultimately executed poorly strikes again 😔
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