#it's just genuinely a really funny phenomenon to me is all

[tvckerwash]

watching people discover the fucked up science guy part of viktor's lore and then being like "we need to acknowledge that he's a fucked up science guy 😔" is so funny. like yeah, he is a fucked up science guy who thinks ethics committees are bullshit because in his mind having rights temporarily violated is perfectly fine if it means saving lives—especially when the ones condemning his beliefs don't offer what they consider to be an ethical alternative to fix the problem and simply let it continue to exist.

and yeah, he's a fucked up science guy who experimented on himself following a, quote: traumatic period of introspection. he had a mental breakdown, fell into a major depressive episode, and spending this horrible time of his life "alone in the depths" reinforced and radicalized his previous beliefs, and to showcase his beliefs (and to try and get rid of his emotions because of how overwhelming they were) he turned himself into a cyborg (and did in fact make himself worse in certain ways but ehh who cares /j).

and yeah, he's a fucked up science guy who gave a kid back alley anti anxiety meds so he could face down his bullies, but he did so after making him a cozy beverage, teaching him about the dangers of propaganda and baseless rumors, and having him scream into a megaphone to freak out said bullies because it was funny (not that he'd admit to finding it funny because then he'd have to admit to having emotions, and well he can't do that, no sir).

so yes, viktor is a fucked up science guy, but that's half his charm! he cares so much about helping people, but he's a weirdo and freak about it! though to be fair, in the city that also has a chemically enhanced werewolf (warwick), a sentient blob of goo (zac), a wind and water goddess (janna), and a literal war criminal who invented chemical warfare (singed), among many other wacky individuals, he's pretty normal all things considered! fucked up science is just a part of life in zaun, my dudes!

[kiyzukiy]

Inevitable fate

Sypnosis: A story as old as time. A girl loving a boy and the boy loving another girl. Nothing to add or show but how you hoped this would be different.

Tags: any lads man x reader, any lads man x MC, reader is not mc, angst, hurt/no comfort, not beta read

Author's note: Heya~ I'm fairly new to this and this is also my first post I've done this way. If I'm missing any tags please tell me. Otherwise I hope you enjoy <3

Have you waited to long? 

Some would say yes, could they witness your…rather disgraceful moment right now. There you stood. Out in the dark. Flowers in one hand. In the other his favorite snack and a handwritten note with all your feelings on it. You had hoped to surprise him. His surprise was bigger.

It was almost comically, really. A scene out of a movie. Life imitating art.

Unfortunate for you, this was no such moment. No one would spring out of the corner of the building and scream “prank!” and shove a camera in your face to record it for eternity. Upload it to some social media and get clicks for it or let it become a happy, albeit with embarrassment toned memory. 

You had the strong feeling, the longer you stood there, this was no such scene but reality. 

In silence you stood and watched them. A bit creepy, you would think to yourself if your brain would work right now on the right wavelengths.

It was like sick pleasure. 

Like watching a car wreck. 

Like a nature phenomenon that could kill you, and yet your eyes couldn't move away. 

The sweet scratch on a point you couldn't quite reach. So why did it slowly start to hurt? Did it start to bleed? Should you have left it alone?

Your body was rigid. So even if you wanted to, you couldn't move away. Leave. Like any other person would do. No. You were very focused on the moment that was going on right in front of you. Every sense that you had laser pointed, marked and sharp to the two people in front of you. 

Your friends warned you, didn't they? If you could remember, you would chastise yourself right now. Numerous excuses running around in your head that you gave them. He wasn't like that. It's more than that. He shows genuine interest. He is so sweet. He gave me flowers last week. There has to be something. 

What did your friends say? You couldn't remember. Your mind a jumbling mess. Numbing every thought. Thoughts jumping from one point to the other. Was it a lie? 

But then again what was the lie? You, or him? 

Look away. 

Now he was grasping her waist. Laughter rang in your ears. Was that her? Was that her laughing? With him? And oh how he laughed. Like spring bloom. Like butterflies kissing your cheeks. How the morning sun gently wakes you up with the promise of a new day. Like life. 

He never laughed that way with you. You wonder why. Was she different? More straightforward? More funny? More assertive? More…her? Who was she anyway? You didn't recognize her. No pictures of her in his home, nor on his phone. No story told with this appearance depicted. You could only guess and that guess didn't fill your cold veins with joy. A feeling of doom pooling in your stomach. 

They both seem to know eachother. Awfully comfortable with another too. Laughing, giggling and holding hands together. 

Look away. 

They were moving and simultaneously, you as well. Were you tailing them now? Oh you sick fuck, okay or was this just another thing of watching a car wreck burn. To prolong the moment? Fascinated and in awe that something like that truly happened. Normally you see this only on TV, on the news or just on social media. As if this would be daily life.

They haven't notice you yet so what’s the harm? Maybe this was the way you wanted to go first. You weren't failing them if you just so happen to walk the same way. It's not like they would notice you anyway. It's not like he would notice. To engrossed in the woman beside him that he was still talking with about who knows what. 

Jealousy reared it's ugly head in your heart. He was not like this with you. Not smiling like that, not keeping the conversation going like that. Genuine interest. No. You mistook it as such. Now you saw what his interest looks like. Engagement, excitement and wanting to listen.

A funny thought entered your head, if and when they spot you, you can just go over and do idle chit-chat like “oh hey. I'm just his friend that he was supposed to meet and yes, yes his dick is impressive. I know first hand. What is your experience with that?” 

Yeah. Right. That's what you are going to do. Let’s be real here, you could talk yourself into it but never following through with it because how could you? 

This is what your friends warned you about. 

Look away. 

What were you doing? Exactly? What was your plan? Idly following them to gather more evidence? For what? It's not like you need the evidence for anything as you were nothing to him anyway. 

You had no valid reason to be angry right now. No one said it should be exclusive. Why should you? You were. Just. Friends. Right? Your own words, when you saw his hesitation at your question what you both were. Friends with benefits if someone wants to be specific. 

So why should you take pictures of this moment? You couldn't shove it in his face and demand answers. You couldn't be angry the way you wanted to be. Oh, how you wanted to be angry right now. Raging and screaming. Throwing things at him and watch how he struggled to get a good excuse in. 

But you were only a friend or maybe something else entirely.

Maybe a cheap fuck. Maybe a good distraction. Maybe a stepping stone. Maybe the one to test things out on. Maybe…nothing more than to get the one who got away. 

Was that her? The one he always told you has long since slipped away? The one who assumably forgot about him and moved on? Is that her? With her long, ebony brown hair and expressive eyes? With her fit physique. Perfect nails, even better outfit. Though you wouldn't be surprised if you could dress her up the way you wanted to and she still would look stunning. With that step in her walk like she was excited to meet someone she hasn't seen in a while. Wild hands as she told a story and he listened. Oh? He listened. One more thing you could tick off of your list that he wouldn't do with you. Not in this way. No, not…in this way.

You couldn't deny it. She was beautiful. The longer you looked, watched, observed this was a fact. Well, in your mind you always could give her a nasty personality. Judge her only on her appearance. Could tell yourself that she got around in life because of her looks and not what she accomplished on her own. 

Even though that wouldn't help much. Even though that wouldn't be you. That's not you. You are not like that, but right now you wanted to crash out and not be yourself. Be mean, be vengeful, be hateful. And yet? A sad little smile on your face, you admitted to yourself that she was beautiful. Inside and out. You had a feeling that she was and she looked stunning right next to him. Fitting. Not…like you. 

Just one moment. Let yourself be. Even though it wouldn't help. Only you and your bruised ego over the fact that you went and gave your heart to the wrong man. Again. 

Look away.

Almost, right? Just almost. You haven't done it yet. Not completely. That was soothing, wasn't it? You haven't confessed yet. You wanted to. That was the whole plan of your meet up with him today. The whole sense behind you, now following them, getting flowers and his snack because women could woo men too. That was the plan. What a grand plan that was! 

You…had a plan. A cute picknick underneath the night sky. Watching the stars and professing your love and you both would enter a happy, healthy relationship. The end. 

Reality was but a cruel joke or your saving grace. Lucky you didn't do it. At least that's what you will tell yourself when you get home. In the mirror. Alone. Memories of you and him running on loop behind your eyes and you will ask yourself what you lack. But that was a problem for future you, wasn't it?

Look away! 

Pitter patter. You hear it before you feel it. You scoffed. Right, of course. Now this was rather ridiculous and might you add ironic of life. Why yes of course it would really rain right now. As if this wasn't movie worthy to begin with. Now you would be soaked when you get home as well. 

Well, at least you didn't confessed right? This can be another failed dating attempt you can gossip with your friends about. A small hihi haha story while they ramble on about who they dated last and what happend with that encounter. 

It would be funny. If you wouldn't hurt so much right now. Because this could have been perfect. This could have been your moment. He was the man. Kind, attentive, supportive and understanding. Alright, so what? Maybe you started as friends with benefits but you were friends and the sex was even better. Silly banter and an comfortable vibe between you. What else does a relationship need? 

This could have been it.

Please, look away sweetie.

Now he was touching her cheek. She was turning to him. Beneath a lamp post in the park. No body around. You still far away in the dark. Shivering, flowers soaked and still clutching that stupid snack in your hand. Knuckles turning white. Teeth grinding and jaw clenching. Against your better judgement you were angry. And sad. And disappointed. And so god damn hurt. Jesus, why did it hurt so much? You were nothing. Only the memories weren't nothing. They were real. Real interactions that made you fall in love. That made you giggle and laugh and reminiscence about what could be. What could have been. 

You wish you could hold your heart right now. Clench the shirt above your heart. Symbolic to the pain. The heavy weight on your chest that didn't let you breathe freely.

Would it happen now? That what the singers and poets always proclaim about? The deepest pain, the most lingering scar? Is this the moment where you will hear your heart shatter in the rain? 

They don't seem to be bothered by it. While everyone was flittering and running about to get underneath shelter, these two seem disgustingly happy that it was, in fact, raining. Oh to be sickingly in love so that you would gladly take the cold that would follow after such events. Being stone cold out, but the moment was beautiful. For them. At least. A story they could tell. Oh so romantic. Oh so loving, oh so beautiful. Re-enacted out of a book.

You would just be down with a cold and calling in sick because you just. Couldn't. Look. Away. 

Please, why? Look away, starlight. Come on. 

Ah, there it was. The moment. A movie. The scene. The setting. The light. Romance. Young, undisturbed love. A kiss. 

And you. Sticking out like a sore thumb. A watcher. A silent bystander to their rom-com. A witness to their happy end and ever after. 

They don't notice you. But you notice. You notice your heart plumpeting to the depths of the earth, only to burn in front of the events before you. You feel it break. Pain surges through your veins. To how many pieces can a beating heart shatter? Do you dare to count? Would it be the amount of the shared memories? Would it be the many times you wished to be more? How long would it take to put it back together? Would you ever get closure or would you continue on with the things in mind that you saw today? Could you pretend nothing happened and be quiet by his side? Don't you love yourself more than that?

Princess, look away. 

What were you to him for him to be able to do this with no second thought? Does he feel any guilt right now, any thoughts about you? Does he see you behind his eyes when they close in this intimate moment? 

It didn't seem this way. It more so felt like a punch to the gut to witness just how little you meant to him. Apparently. Evidently. Written and signed by him truly. 

Cutie…look away. 

And you do. With a shaking breath, you look away. One slugging step at the time, you turn away. Tears falling down your face as you look up to the sky and wonder: 

Have you waited too long?

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

medialog april 2k25

ok first of all i just want to say that a few years ago i decided i would start always counting months monday to sunday, four weeks with a few fives, and this year april was a 5-week month, so this is actually not late and also that’s why thunderbolts, a movie i saw on may 4th, is on my april list (because i am a crazy person). ok anyway

books

toni morrison, playing in the dark: whiteness and the literary imagination — obviously great, but what i appreciated most about it was the way that morrison takes pains to clarify that her present interest is in the literary uses of blackness in american literature — its place in the toolbox of american writers — separate from the question of whether or not such and such author/book “is” racist. i am similarly very interest in projects that explore this kind of question from a formal, aesthetic perspective, which is not to say a depoliticized one but to observe that politics makes it known formally and aesthetically as much as it does didactically. there are much more interesting things to say about this stuff than “that’s racist” even though the existence of this phenomenon is of course inseparable from racism.

jennette mccurdy, i’m glad my mother is dead — as good as you’ve heard, and then some. often genuinely quite brutal to read, but told with a clarity and lightness (sometimes even a bracing and dark sense of humor!) that speaks both to what must have been enormous psychoemotional work on mccurdy’s part and to a real command of what she wants to say, which is in some ways the most moving aspect of the book—she talks about writing being a desire authentic to her, one her mother stifled, and it’s really gratifying to see proof in the book you’re reading that she’s good at it. she’s really deft with what details to include, and with the way that she writes her own present-tense first-person perspective in a way that never outpaces her own understanding at a given point in the narrative but still makes it unmistakable for the reader exactly what’s going on. also contains some of the most unflinching writing about EDs — across the spectrum — that i’ve read.

f. scott fitzgerald, tender is the night — i’ve said my piece on this already but: changed me as a person, forged me as a writer, the most gorgeously written book in the english language, weirder and more complicated and funnier than i remember every time i go back to it, never fails to move me profoundly in the closing sequence

suzanne collins, sunrise on the reaping — i just like the hunger games… i think objectively this is probably the weakest of the series because it’s basically the same as the first book but while haymitch is quite lovable especially given the affection readers will bring from his role in the OG trilogy, and while collins’s knack for sketching instantly memorable and likable characters that it’s really fucked up to watch die remains intact, there is just no competing with katniss, as perfectly constructed a protagonist as children’s lit has ever seen. but i read it in like three days and it was so sad and fucked up it almost made my tummy hurt (there’s one scene in particular i have to imagine will be toned down for the screen adaptation…) and the post-series epilogue made me cry for real lmao.

elif batuman, the idiot — i guess this book does what it sets out to do but wow i just could not care about this person or the “events” that “happened” (generous use of the words) at any point in this book at all. i actually also finished this one in three days but it was because i was so bored that i couldn’t bear the idea of waking up over and over in a world where i still had more of this book to read. i just didn’t care about anyone or anything or find the prose or scenes pleasurable in any way except for like 3 times one of which was that really funny line about eating a baguette where she’s like “the baguette required ear muscles i had lost in two million years of evolution,” that was great. but overall i was just not on the wavelength. i also was very annoyed by batuman’s use of repetition for comedic (...?) effect / pseudonaturalism (...?)... i didn’t find it funny or convincing and i noticed it really early so it just felt like a tic and every time she did it again i was like ENOUGH ALREADY.

david carr, the night of the gun: a reporter investigates the darkest story of his life. his own. — i like addiction memoirs because i have always felt a very profound “there but for the grace of god go i” resonance with substance abuse and i tend to find them oddly relatable despite never being even a moderately heavy user of literally anything. i also like stuff about the unreliability of memory. so i was the target demo for this book more or less and my review should not be taken as objective, but i thought this was pretty great. two anecdotes that sort of boil down this book’s deal: (1) there’s a part early on where he says something like “would you like my story if i said i was a fat thug who dealt bad coke and beat women? what if i said i was a father of two in recovery who had gotten sober to raise my twin girls? well both are true, so.” (2) the incident that spurred him into final rehab/full sobriety* for real was not the birth of his twin daughters but the night he left them in the backseat of the car to go get cocaine… which he remembered as both taking place shortly after their spring births and being cold enough to dress them in their snowsuits, a contradiction resolved when his brother reminded him he had in fact spent several months shooting cocaine while theoretically being a father. (*asterisk because this also includes, unusually in recovery memoirs, a section about his later relapse into alcoholism.) if that sounds like a guy you want to read a book about you’d probably like it too!

charles king, every valley: the desperate lives and troubled times that made handel’s messiah — this is one of those books that sort of uses one thing as a hook to take us on a little historical tour, in this case messiah acting as the excuse to lead us around 18th century england (mostly), its deranged political climate, its mix of enlightenment philosophy and often miserable living conditions sprinkled with steady outbursts of violence, its theater scene (including a truly bananas series of events surrounding suzannah arne, who makes her way in because she was one of the soloists in the first performances of messiah). i don’t care too much about this period in this place and i did kinda want a slightly deeper dive into messiah itself, but i had fun. i particularly appreciated the inclusion of the story of ayuba diallo, an educated and wealthy west african who got kidnapped into slavery on the way to doing some slave trading of his own and somehow talked his way out of it, becoming a bit of a british curiosity before heading home, no more antislavery than he left but having talked the royal african company into offering a ransom option for enslaved muslims… fascinating stuff.

george eliot, silas marner — i just feel like maybe no one has ever understood human psychology and behavior better than eliot did… this book is quite short (less than 200 pages) and its length and the clockwork nature of its plot give it the feel of a fable or a parable, but it’s so astonishingly dense with how many observations about the ways people can be she works into her sweet little story of redemption. she’s just such a warm, funny, wise narrator, it’s wonderful to be allowed to see the world the way she sees it… and it’s crazy that this book is a century and a half old, describing a world old-fashioned by the time it was published, and soooo many little moments, reactions, etc. feel so timeless and modern and fresh… like dolly telling silas “oh don’t bother to buy her baby clothes, she’ll outgrow them right away, i have some hand-me-downs you can use,” a conversation probably happening all over the world right now. this book also has some of the best writing i’ve ever seen about how great it is to hang out with a baby… at one point the baby pouts for her shoes to be removed and then after silas takes them off “baby was at once happily occupied with the primary mystery of her own toes, inviting silas, with much chuckling, to consider the mystery too.” like… that’s so real… babies literally do love to ponder the mystery of their own toes…!

george saunders, tenth of december — HELL YEAH FUCKIN RIGHT!!! finally i came across a story collection i actively enjoyed reading… saunders is weird and inventive and fun and funny and interestingly moralistic (not a criticism), and really above all i just loved reading his voice, i would have let him take me anywhere. i think my favorite story was the collection opener “victory lap,” which introduces to a pollyanna-ish young girl and then has her get child abducted… but is not remotely a story about how her sunny worldview is proven wrong. i was really pleased and moved by that. but honestly i enjoyed reading every story in the book. great stuff! wonderful times!

jenny offill, dept. of speculation — this was alright. i thought the writing was pretty good and i basically enjoyed it on a sentence level — it’s a novel told in short little bursts of prose, not even vignettes really, some almost aphoristic, and some of these were real knockouts in terms of being poignant or unexpected or funny. and i more or less liked reading the day to day observational stuff, the chapter about the actual horror of bedbugs, the early parenting material… unfortunately i was not compelled at all by the actual plot, which hinges on the disruption and subsequent repair of the marriage after the husband’s affair… some of my best friends are adultery novels but this one made me feel like the people who complain they are tired of litfic about professors and affairs (the protagonist is a writer/creative writing professor which… also a hard sell tbh. this is just not as interesting as writers want it to be). it also really had me like… man, the standards for men are so low it’s crazy… he fucks some girl at work or whatever and then we never like actually see him putting in any effort whatsoever into fixing things, we’re told she has to drag everything out of him in couples therapy, and then the thing that fixes it is they move out of brooklyn to the country…? girl stand up… i just did not buy the emotional resolution of this story at all even a little bit and i truly feel like to do so you have to have internalized a certain psychological weight and depth to the concept of “marriage” which is inseparable from having the most minimal emotional standards in the world for men. all that said i did find the format creatively/artistically stimulating to think about and potentially useful to tuck away thoughts about for the future.

david grann, killers of the flower moon: the osage murders and the birth of the FBI — this was really good and also (appropriately) incredibly upsetting. grann is a clean and thoughtful writer and he tells an incredibly compelling narrative about a series of acts beyond comprehension in the depth of their evil. he also makes a point of citing osage historians & writers repeatedly, which i appreciated. i always feel guilty about finding the investigative/procedural side of stuff fascinating but well… it was…. as was the stuff about hoover’s reforms & ambitions and the case’s role as early PR buzz for the FBI (including an episode of their radio show about it… yikes!). what is most devastating is what the final portion of the book is dedicated to, which is the reality that after william hale was convicted, the FBI considered the case closed even though hale had not been conclusively linked to all 24 victims of the “reign of terror”… grann traces how his own attempt to learn more from the record about one of the potentially unsolved cases leads to the realization that the scope of white people killing osage indians for their oil money certainly extends far beyond those 24 names, and he does such a good job of articulating the psychic toll that takes on a community for generations that i had to put the last couple chapters down a few times to take some breaths.

movies

the long kiss goodnight - this is a very weird and badly directed movie where geena davis plays an amnesiac who has hired samuel l. jackson to investigate her past and then it turns out she is a CIA agent which makes this the second movie i have seen where brian cox plays a fed in charge of an amnesiac assassin for the US government… i’d only have two nickels etc. the thing that really sinks this i think is that the director just does not understand shane black’s sense of humor at all or have the mastery necessary to walk the tonal tightrope necessitated by the script… but its badness does highlight how fun it is to watch jackson do anything

vanilla sky - weird movie but weird in a way where it’s like a strange high-concept premise with a deliberately confusing middle portion but it’s directed by cameron crowe who’s like the least weird man alive so it’s very normal feeling in a way that feels at odds with its central project…? bold to cast tom cruise at his peak and hide his face under a weird serial killer mask or post-car-crash disfigurement make-up for much of the runtime… his hair looks incredible and also freakishly like that of squall from final fantasy viii. i guess it was fine

companion - please put yellowjackets out of its misery after season 4 so sophie thatcher can go make a million silly horror movies for me to see her in <3 her AND harvey guillén, with a surprise jaboukie appearance? incredibly star-studded cast for the niche demographic of people who live in my apartment. don’t expect it to be any smarter than it needs to be but i had a lot of fun!

jack reacher - tom cruise… i actually don’t know how to classify this. i was going to say spy movie but it’s not really that… there’s some action but it’s not an action movie… but it’s too action heavy to be a legal thriller… i guess just a regular thriller? ish? rosamund pike… honestly might have been miscast but i love watching her so i don’t really mind. one time the mission impossible podcast guys said something about how mcquarrie lights skin in rogue nation and i did find myself watching this thinking everyone’s skin looks great (not great like “great skin” great like “i like the way you put this skin on screen” oh my god that sounds like serial killer language w/e you know what i mean)

the usual suspects - i wanted to watch this mostly because i’m so fascinated by the fac that christopher mcquarrie won an oscar for this screenplay and then couldn’t get a movie made for eight years and now he’s professionally tom cruise’s director more or less. ummm it was alright. the twist was spoiled for me by the key and peele cat poster sketch years ago but was still fun to watch. benicio del toro is sooooo good in every second he’s on screen i needed 300% more of him

high school musical 2 - this movie is crazy lmao the “we spent more than twelve dollars on it this time” vibes are off the charts both in the general look of the movie (which is clearly still a disney channel movie but like… a way more expensive one) and the choreo/group numbers, which have been beefed the fuck UP. the gay brother plays a piano in a pool??? watched this as the first one kinda sotned with one friend who was a fellow novice and two younger millennial friends who sang along with every song except the crazy fake hawaiian racist ashley tisdale number in the middle which they had completely blocked from memory. 10/10 viewing experience no notes

sinners - SLAAAAAPPED. really beautiful to look at for almost the whole time, insanely well-acted, creative and clever and, can’t emphasize this enough, so much more historically grounded than a hollywood product almost ever is… there’s like actual ideas here and they’re connected to reality and they’re expressed in interesting and compelling ways through the metaphorical valence of a pretty sick-ass vampire movie. the final fight scene is a little weak compared to everything else and there were a few points where i was like “ok i get it”... but i really fucking loved living in the world of this movie.

thunderbolts - idk guys… this one really worked for me… i loved bucky as like everybody else’s trauma elder… i loved every single thing florence pugh did in this film… i loved lewis pullman’s twitchy pathetic wet cat vibe and the concept of a character in a superhero movie whose whole deal is that he is seriously, actually incredibly unwell… the yelena/red guardian family stuff here worked way better than it did in black widow (one scene made me cry lol)… no laser lightning fights at ALL… they went as unflashy as possible with some of the effects in ways that made them actually much more effective… unbelievably funny gag in the ending credits art… JLD funny… geraldine viswanathan there??? but also all i ever wanted from these dumbass movies was for them to use silly superhero stuff to tell unsubtle stories about big human feelings and this one marries the content and theme about as well as the MCU’s ever done it, IMO, and definitely the best since before endgame. again there’s a reason despite falling very out of love with the MCU i have never changed my icon on this, a blog i started because i couldn’t shut the fuck up about bucky barnes, so i am not an objective observer here… but i had a great time at the movies

television

the white lotus (s3) - i’m like the only person on earth who hated s2 and therefore had zero expectations going into s3 and so i sort of agree with all the complaints that boil down to “this show is kind of dumb” but didn’t actually mind any of the dumbness at any time. public act of service IMO to introduce gen z to parker posey

yellowjackets (s3) - it’s actually crazy how fucking shitty and bad and stupid and horrible and inane and dumb this season of television was considering how much i loved the show before… like i’ve just never seen anything like it some of the all-time worst writing in the history of the screen. unbelievably bad. surreally bad.

daredevil: born again (s1) - idk fine i guess? reminded me that i did always find charlie cox as matt murdock a really charming performance but in a way where i wished he was in a show i liked rather than one that was… fine. i never made it past season 1 of the netflix series but well it wasn’t homework for two separate ringer podcasts back then so i’ll probably tune in for s2 to access that sweet sweet Content

currently watching: andor, which it turns out everyone on earth correctly identified as Good Actually; we picked up cheers as a chillout sitcom watch and it really makes going to work in a bar where you and your boss sexually harass each other all day look sooooooo appealing

music

had an off month for music bc i started feeling overstimulated generally and couldn’t listen to any music at all for a while and then my phone broke… so not a lot of albums this month. but i have a bunch loaded on to a playlist and am tentatively optimistic about resuming my albums era! (finding my bluetooth headphones would help though.) this month’s single is this gorgeous track by debby friday which starts out light and trancey and goes in a sort of caroline-polacheck-remix-of-everything-is-romantic direction and just soars really beautifully:

ALT BLK ERA, rave immortal - loud & dumb & fun! they’re already wearing out their welcome but i enjoyed it

alisa xayalith, slow crush - i really loved her single “what the hell do we do now” but the album didn’t quite live up to its promise… pretty but mostly forgettable although a couple tracks might stick around

ZORA, Z D A Y - zora’s first 2025 album back in jan was the first new release i really loved and is still one of my faves of the year so i was very disappointed that this one was kind of a miss for me… not sure if it was rushed or if she’s just doing a different vibe but it felt very half-assed and forgettable

Btrickz, 80’z - a charming 11 minutes of chatty-sounding hispanophone rap, not my fave kind of thing but a cool vibe

[olderthannetfic]

Sending this to you specifically because I feel like you're the only normal brained person about this series.

I read Captive Prince a couple of years ago and liked it fine, as someone who doesn't have a strong preference for or against m/m and therefore isn't well-versed enough in its clichés to notice whether it reads like something full of cliché fanfic tropes. I really liked the use of language, some of the historical/political stuff, some of the ways that the characters are made complicated or unreliable.

The problem is, I've since coincidentally read most of the books that were Pacat's inspiration and. Well. Like 80-90% of the stuff in there has direct parallels in one of those. I'm not sure if there are more than three original thoughts in there.

I am not joking, if you read 1. The Lymond Chronicles and House of Niccolò by Dorothy Dunnett; 2. The Nightrunner series by Lynn Flewelling and 3. The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice, you will find that some of the scenes were ripped off beat for beat, many jokes were taken and just lazily reworded, a lot of the character beats and arcs are at best a mashup of 2 or maximum 3 things from those books with the serial numbers filed off really poorly. There's a scene where some characters discover a suicide victim whose structure and descriptions are completely ripped off from another series, except Pacat fails to see what made the original scene so impactful. A lot of the pretty use of language is also directly copied from those, including some really really specific descriptors. It's so blatant!

And I don't see how people are okay with this! I know people who are fans of several of these works and they're totally cool with it! And honestly if it were some rando's unpublished original project I'd be cool with it too, but as a published beloved worldwide phenomenon with rabid fans? C'mon.

And another thing is, all of the other series mentioned above are balls to the wall insane. She just... she just made it bland. She took off most of the edge and reshuffled the elements into a fairly straightforward MLM love story with some light kink thrown in. It's not a BAD series, but I feel like I'm disappointed that someone read all my favourite books and THAT was their takeaway?

--

I started reading, got to the name of the series and burst out laughing.

And, wow, you brought up something totally new that I hadn't thought about! I'm impressed. Genuinely. Usually, I rant about all the reasons I hate the series while debunking the standard anti talking points.

--

I've read the Vampire Chronicles, but that was in the 90s and I read Captive Prince in like 2016 or after. I had zero recollection of common points. I haven't read The Lymond Chronicles despite years of hurt/comfort fans bugging me to do so, and I think I got like a chapter into the Nightrunner series before getting distracted...

The reason I found Captive Prince annoying and derivative is that it also reads exactly like the original m/m that was available when it was first being written, most notably the work of P.L. Nunn who was extremely famous for horny fan art but who also wrote some original m/m fantasy novels. The scene where they finally bone reminds me heavily of the one from... uh... what's the P.L. Nunn one where the prince creeps on that archer dude and he gets raped because of course and then the prince has to be ~patient~ and it's peak boring 2000s rape recovery tropes?

The rape backstory is not only lifted from Fushigi Yuugi (the author's fandom at the time) but is shared with basically 100% of original m/m from that era. It's sometimes the uncle, sometimes the stepfather. One single time that I can think of, it was the foster brother, but mostly it's that "funny uncle" type. Unless it's gang rape from a bad Gundam Wing fic. That was also everywhere.

Once somebody told me the author had previously shipped Tamahome/Nakago, I realized that they'd taken what would be a kind of unusual anime ship and made it a thousand times more boring by dumbing down the scary, tall general with the tragic backstory into an uke-appropriate waif.

So I guess what I'm saying is that there may be some inspiration you aren't familiar with, but it's the same story as what you said above: this is the blander remix.

--

As for why people are okay with this... honestly, most of the people who really adore the series whom I've talked to point to how it encapsulates the exact tropes and tone they loved in anime fic circa 2000.

As a fellow weeb, I loathed the tone of said anime fic circa 2000 and could not wait for tastes to change, so Captive Prince is a hideous blast from an unlamented past for me.

I think most people who love the series aren't familiar with its inspirations. Those that are may have consumed them quite a while ago and don't realize quite how direct the parallels are. Or, for the inspirations that aren't overtly canon m/m, the lure of it being Exactly Right may overshadow other things.

(They also mostly haven't read 90s fantasy doorstops that actually contain political intrigue, tactics and strategy. Captive Prince is a piss poor entry into this genre and should be recced for m/m, not this other stuff people constantly think is in there. None of these characters can reason their way out of a paper bag.)

More than any of that, there's a lot of love left over from when the series was a serialized original story on Livejournal in an era when we had vanishingly few original m/m works, especially long ones in a fantasy alternate world.

I think that is what gets it a pass when a new m/m novel presented as "m/m romance" or posted on one of the webnovel sites would be mocked for unoriginality. Many Captive Prince fans aren't (or weren't when they read it) all that familiar with the smorgasbord of original m/m available today. Many are unfamiliar with anime fanfic circa 2000, so this feels adjacent to the fic they've read but a little fresher... instead of like the week-old sardine tin I found it to be.

[utilitycaster]

Wait. So CR3 ended with Liliana, Ludanis, technically Predathos (within Imogen or something?), and all the gods all still alive (though technically in mortal form)?

I understand that sometimes it's journey before destination and the story is more important than the finale of the story but....W-what was the point??? If the BBEG Cult Leader who kicked this whole thing off to kill the gods and the gods are both still alive what was the point??

So Liliana was alive, Ludinus was alive (having used Clone or similar), and Predathos ran away because the gods assumed mortal form and there was nothing to eat on Exandria.

Really, while again I have my many critiques, the actual only part of this end state I think is a genuine mistake is Ludinus.

I think that Imogen deciding to join with the Volition and assassinate Liliana would have been a compelling character moment for Imogen; when she didn't do that I felt that Liliana dying when she chose to defy Ludinus would have been a compelling character moment for Imogen. When that also did not happen, my general feeling was "I don't really care about her fate, but it doesn't matter at this point," so her ending is one of the many "yeah, that's fine I guess" ones this campaign delivered. I don't think she's a good person, but I also think that now that she's just a regular-ass sorcerer and her cult leader tried to horribly murder her and then disappeared she has no motivation to continue committing crimes so yeah wandering around figuring out who she is now makes sense. It's still not interesting; most of my criticism in the end is "this wasn't very interesting."

The gods becoming mortal was genuinely interesting and any critique I have is how poorly it was signaled, how irrelevant it made any of the excruciatingly dull circular discussions throughout the campaign (and how hypocritical and stupid it made the characters as a result, not that that wasn't a problem from the start), and how malformed the logic of what this means mechanically for clerics was. But that is an interesting change, to me, especially since the Divine Gate is now down. Idk I think it's possible for the cycle to genuinely begin again; I mean, wizards figured out the rites of ascension before. Will one of the gods-become-mortal undo their own bindings, or will some wizard studying this phenomenon hit on the formula? The party (and fandom) discussion of Who Gets Power was rendered completely pointless but like, the actual concept is great.

Ludinus, however; honestly it makes no sense either way because not only did he do nothing to narratively earn any kind of redemptive ending [if I say "earn" know it's narratively because he is a pretend guy and the people who act like fictional characters are real and should get capital punishment are Calvinist freaks]; I don't see why he'd just hang out making tea unless he somehow thinks the gods are genuinely gone, having missed out on the happenings after his form was killed. Like, look. I do not believe that you have to kill the bad guy to have a satisfying ending, but you do need to follow through with the implications and this doesn't seem to have done so. The only possible ways this fits with his character are either that he's biding his time to do some other bullshit (possible, and if he pops up in a one-shot or miniseries to do villainy and get murdered I'll grant this), if he somehow hasn't found out and thinks the gods are dead (less likely but admittedly pretty funny, and if he lives out the remainder of his life in an isolated cottage, blissfully ignorant, thinking he got his revenge when he never did, that is a boring option but see above, this campaign usually went with the boring option for character development so what else is new), or if we somehow managed to get an ending that is more unwilling to give someone any kind of follow-through in the end than Ted Lasso, which is embarrassing, and I liked Ted Lasso for what it was.

[ducktracy]

no shade to tlts and especially not the people who worked on it but it does really feel like it's only relevant in the modern day because it's so Fandomable, by virtue of its sitcom nature simplifying, downright flanderizing everyone down to a few basic traits that make them so simple that it makes even the 30's shorts feel like they were full of complex and elaborate characterizations. daffy perhaps being the biggest example (well. and lola too, but lola is more obvious. and also i like her more). but because they're so simple, they're easy to make ship art for and slot into incorrect quotes without worrying "Hey, am I portraying these characters right?" because they're hardly characters at all. Or is that too mean to say

I LOVE YOU ANON. YES. i’m genuinely sorry to the couple dozen people who’ve seen me making the same few posts about this over and over the past few days, i’ve been in a crotchety mood because of this and i know it’s not very becoming of me but you have sent this at the perfect time because i’ve been stewing in the consequences of this all day. actually for the past 6 years even

I’VE BEEN SAYING THIS SAAAAME THING IT’S SO TRUE. look. i clearly don’t like TLTS but i understand why it’s as popular as it is. i understand why people like it. i completely understand why it’s the entry point that it is. i disagree with so much of the show fundamentally, but i completely understand why it’s the phenomenon that it is and just because i don’t like it doesn’t mean other people can’t. I WANT TO! i literally want people to enjoy it in my stead! if i can’t get any enjoyment out of it then i am so glad that someone else can. embrace it. have fun with it

but it’s so responsible for this game of telephone with these characters. i mean. okay not truly responsible, this game of telephone has been happening even as early as the classics themselves, but TLTS absolutely boils down the characters to their most bare essentials that vaguely fit the sitcom niche. these characters are modeled to fit a sitcom and the stereotyping therein, not the other way around of a sitcom about these complex and nuanced characters. “Porky can have a tendency to be meek” is transformed into “Porky can’t stand up for himself whatsoever and is the doormat to end all doormats”. “Daffy has an ego and does impulsive things” is turned into “Daffy is turned into the lovechild of Peter Griffin and Homer Simpson and treats everyone like shit because we saw how he treated Speedy Gonzales—not even Bugs—and decided he treats everyone that way”. it’s just. completely misrepresenting these characters and doing them so dirty. i don’t think i’ll ever not be mad at the way this show treats Porky and i sincerely do think it has contributed to a genuine bias against his character from most of the fandom, even if they don’t realize it. it genuinely gets me seething. the skinnier he is the more fat jokes we make and we’ll also make jokes about how nobody wants to hear him sing because he’s a stuttering idiot who can’t talk right isn’t that so funny (TLTS did not do this, that i remember, i’m ranting about a short that was so bad that Bob Bergen refused to voice Porky in it, but it’s still all stemming from that same game of telephone and chain reaction)

and i would be more okay with this if people didn’t take it as absolute gospel. but they do. and will act like you’re the wrong one. i know i’m being so mean right now but i had someone make a bunch of really nasty and vague posts about me just today that are a direct consequence of this issue and i’ve kind of been losing my mind all day lol. i don’t know how to word any of this without sounding like “it’s so hard because i’m smarter than you ❤️”, i don’t believe that at all, i’m always learning new things and correcting my own misinformation every single day. but. genuinely. the amount of times i’ve had people fansplain these characters and the series to me. i had someone say “well Daffy treats Porky like shit in TLTS because it’s revealed Porky bullied him in high school” FOR THAT ONE SINGLE EP THAT WAS CLEARLY A SUBVERSIVE GAG AND IS NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN? TLTS HAS CONTINUITY! IF THIS WAS THE CASE IT WOULD SAY SO! THE WHOLE JOKE IS THAT SUCH BEHAVIOR IS SO UNLIKE PORKY!!! …for the show, anuway. because HE CAN BE A BITCH! but people never realize it in the right way!

but yeah. i’m rambling i’m so sorry this is incoherent but i’ve been malding all day and so this just comes at a great time lol i’m genuinely sorry for how petty and annoying i must sound but it’s tortuous. the fandomization and easy digestibility of the characters is so true, and people get mad at you when you try to point out that the characters weren’t always that way or something is out of character. and it’s not that i don’t think people can like or headcanon these things. but so many people pass it off as being absolute FACT, Daffy Duck TOLD me his white band around the neck is actually a diamond necklace because isn’t that sooo effeminate and funny and weird lol. i. god. ahhhhhh. THE THINGS I COULD SAY. there’s also the point that so many TLTS fans making this argument don’t even seem to be using the material that the show gives them. i’m all for taking creative liberties and disregarding “canon” (pssst there is no canon it’s LT), but. well. there’s just so much hypocrisy. i’m holding back but there’s a lot of hypocrisy.

and what i also hate is that this transcends into disdain for the originals because they’re OLD or BORING. HOW UTTERLY DISRESPECTFUL TO THE LEGACY OF THESE CHARACTERS????? there are plenty of reasons to dislike elements of the classics, i am extremely well versed in all of the racism and misogyny and homophobia/transphobia and xenophobia and occasional antisemitism and jingoism in these shorts. they’re 95 years old (today, in fact! happy anniversary LT i’ve spent it all day malding over your ignorant fans) there are absolutely reasons not to like them or shy away from them, and these things should be talked about!! the characters and these shorts are of their time, and that’s for better or worse!

but people don’t even care enough about that!! they just don’t give the originals a chance and again, this wouldn’t bother me as much if everyone suddenly didn’t act like they’re the utmost authority on LT. and the amount of pushback i’ve seen for this is!!! shocking!!! i’ve had more than one person make a vague post about me that’s like “and if you correct me on something i get wrong because i didn’t mention something from this bumfuck 80 year old short or whatever, i don’t care”. like. ok nobody worded it that way but i feel like you can just say “disclaimer, there are probably details i’m missing because i haven’t seen these shorts, so my post will be concocted for that point of view” that’s FINE! THATS LITERALLY FINE! but there’s so much dishonesty and pretentiousness that goes around and it really hurts my head. especially because i feel like i’ll be the asshole know it all for saying that no, the characters were not always intended this way. i feel that way because i’ve been dealing with the repercussions of this all day lol

also, what they don’t want you to know is that the 30s shorts do have more complexity and depth to them!!!!!! it’s there if you look for it!! “it’s fucking Looney Tunes who cares” is an equally acceptable reaction, but, like! i don’t know! i just get really mad and upset at how so many people put down these shorts and, with it, the vision of the creators who have the end all be all SAY all of these characters whether you like it or not. nobody is gonna know these characters better than the people who made them. MYSELF INCLUDED! Bob Clampett could come to me tonight in a dream and say “all that stuff you analyzed about [insert random short here] isn’t true, i just did it because it’s funny” and i’d say you got it boss! i’m very aware of this because i work in cartoons too!! i’m sympathetic of both the cartoonist’s angle and the overzealous fan angle. but no i have no problem in saying that some of these 30s shorts genuinely are more meaningfully thought out and have more meaningful character analysis. and this isn’t to put down the TLTS crew. but this is just!!! idk. retaliation against this really weird fandom centric superiority complex so many people have

it’s just so tiring.. i want to interact with the LT fandom more but each time i do i’m so reminded of why i don’t. i never go in any tags and never look for any art beyond what my friends are drawing because i know i’ll just get mad at people displaying this weird cliquey pompousness about it all. and a lot of it is on my end! i am way too overprotective of these characters! i do have terminal “He Would Not Fucking Say That” disease and that’s something i gotta work on! but i just feel like… iunno. maybe this sounds whiny or victim-y but i’ve been complaining a lot recently about giving people a lot of grace and flexibility and making amends for these differences in opinion that i’m never given back. and instead i have people vague posting about me on their blog over a span of 12 hours mocking my posts and accusing me of their own behavior that they are clearly projecting themselves onto. now i know i’m getting whiny and immature and annoying by bringing this up i know it doesn’t do any good but i’m just so tired man :’) i’ve been dealing with these same issues for 6 years and my filter for it is beginning to slip.

i’m still going i’m sorry LOL. LOLA. i do like what they did with Lola because i hate her in Space Jam and tbh i pretend she doesn’t exist 95% of the time. TLTS did do Lola right, that and Kwesi Boakye as Gossamer/Roz Ryan as Hazel are the two things i will enjoy about the show.

man there is still so much more i can say but i’ve been malding all day and i am so tired. i’m sure it’s very noticeable. i’m so sorry for how pretentious and obnoxious i sound, you worded this so much better than i could, i agree with absolutely everything you said here. i don’t even mind that people do these things, but i mind the way that they act like it’s the end all be all and will literally get mad or accusatory when you say that’s not the intent. you’re free to interpret as you please, lord knows i do, but you have to be mindful of the intent that these characters were created in. if you prefer TLTS and prefer how these characters act in that show, if you prefer the more fandom centric viewpoints, genuinely that is awesome and i’m sincerely glad you can enjoy and engage in a way that i can’t. please don’t get mad at me if you act like an authority on this and i say that it’s not true. i hate acting like a know it all because i’m not, but i’ve had multiple people say something that amounts to “you act like you know more things than me simply because you know more things than me” and i just. What are we doing here. IT’S LOONEY TUNES. EVEN I CAN SAY THAT GUYS IT’S FUCKING LOONEY TUNESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[flavoredfaeman]

Okay making my own long post so that I can get out all my thoughts clearly

So to start off 1. I think that queer baiting is a completely useless term, in part because all it is used for is arguing whether or not something is queer enough (in part because queerbaiting is an incredibly rare phenomenon in western media), 2. I think that the way male queerness is treated in Deadpool is unfortunate, and 3. Gay people are allowed to find joy in goofy movies and it isn't that serious.

**this is all my opinion, a lot of these topics are up to personal interpretation just like with any other movies or media discussion (I am trying to also cover multiple perspectives here, but I am only one person)

Let's get one thing clear right off the bat, no one who is familiar with marvel and disney actually thought that Deadpool and Wolverine were going to kiss/fuck nasty/become an item. (Those were jokes guys.) Those of us who were hoping for queerness were hoping for some subtext at most or the Deadpool-typical type jokes where he smacks a guy's ass, makes a quippy comment and moves on. And within that context of expectation, we were given way more than we expected.

Now, I will say that it is absolutely sad that we can have these movies with gay jokes, but that actually portraying queer characters seems to be too much for them. As is typical (to my knowledge) of bigger movies, they were allowed to make a side lesbian couple (this is a much larger topic, but for the purposes of this conversation, let me add on: cishet men think lesbians are hot + women are not considered to be able to have "real" relationships without men. So they can get greenlit a bit easier.), but Deadpool is not allowed to have meaningful connections to other men.

Deadpool's jokes about gayness can be interpreted in different ways. To some people, they feel hurtful and deriding. To others, they are the jokes made by a man who is comfortable in his identity, and who makes jokes to take power away from people who may want to use his queerness against him. It's really hard to argue this one way or the other, since Deadpool isn't a real person who we can ask to clarify. As such, how one feels about these jokes usually sits within the context of how they view Deadpool and the movies in general. Personally, I think that these jokes are meant to shock audiences, but I don't think they are actually intended to be hurtful. Especially when the funny part of most of the jokes is when he is making them, not that it's gay. Like, straight or gay, it's funny to talk about sex in a really emotional/tense moment, or in the middle of a fight. Particularly when you see how he treats the other queer people around him, not to mention, you know, the fact that he's canonically pansexual. (Frankly I find it kinda weird to go "aah there's a queer man making jokes about being a queer man!! How terrible!!" but that's my prerogative)

From movie 2 to 3 there does seem to be a change in how queerness is being treated. A positive change, in my opinion. Because Deadpool isn't making all that many jokes in this one, he's got a few for sure (Wolverine has one or two as well!!) but a lot of what he's doing is becoming genuinely close to Wolverine. This shifts the dynamic, now it's not just Deadpool making gay jokes or advances to people who don't really reciprocate (to my memory, though I feel like Colossus may have flirted back at like the end of Deadpool 2?), instead the jokes are being reciprocated/responded to and the characters are being put on even ground. Wolverine is a realized character, just like Deadpool, so they are able to grow closer over the course of the movie, and form an actual connection and bond. (Also a lot of the gay jokes become "wow isn't wolverine so hot?" jokes)

Important to also add that yes, they do start the movie with a very fraught and tense relationship, they are both very violent characters, Wolverine has crazy anger issues, and Deadpool makes everything a joke. All of these things are important to their characters and story! If you took some of those early interactions out of context you could argue that Wolverine isn't reciprocating or something of the like, but that would require ignoring the majority of the film. They are kinda crazy and impervious characters who have opposite personalities in a high stakes setting, of course they are going to fight and try to harm one another.

As much as it's already been talked to death, it is genuinely important to discuss the metaphors in this movie. Because as funny as the Honda jokes are, that scene is heavily implied to be a sex scene. This is the art of film, what you cannot show the viewer, you must convey some other way. The fight happens to You're The One That I Want, they repeatedly stab intimate places (stabbing as metaphor for penetration), the way they position themselves in the car and through themselves at each other, and the camera panning towards the bumper as the car shakes (a classic fade to black sex move). This is all movie language, and it is vital to understanding what a movie is portraying.

The climax is also very important in this regard, because as camp as it is, they were willing to die for each other and in that willingness they were able to save each other. Like A Prayer is playing, they are holding hands, when Wolverine's shirt explodes Deadpool takes a moment to oggle him despite the fact that they're both getting absolutely electrocuted or whatever.

Now, despite all of this absolutely beautiful subtext, Deadpool and Wolverine do not get together. That is absolutely an important part of this conversation, their relationship is ultimately left ambiguous. But a queer man being in a homoerotic ambiguous relationship with another man, does not a queer bait make.

Vanessa is an important part of this discussion of course - though to preface this, I find their relationship really boring so I don't really remember a lot of what happened between them in the first movie. Deadpool is canonically pansexual, so his relationship with any woman does not make him any less queer. Though, it could be argued that she's been kept around as a character to make sure he's always in or longing for a straight relationship.

Some people have been arguing that the movie ends with Deadpool getting back together with her, which blatantly does not happen. They were in a weird stage of exes being friends at the start of the movie, where she was in a new relationship, and he was still pining. All he does at the end of the movie is go over to her to let her know he cares about her, which could be romantic or platonic - but IS NOT them getting together. And again - even if he still is in love with her by the end of the movie, he is still queer.

In addition, I don't think that Deadpool is monogamous. He's constantly flirting and showing interest in many different people. Now I don't remember if he ever has a conversation with Vanessa about monogamy, so I could be missing an important part of their dynamic. But as it stands to my knowledge, Deadpool being in love with Vanessa doesn't mean he's not in love with Wolverine.

Both of these potential relationships end in the air. And of the two (if we assume monogamy is important) Vanessa said she had a boyfriend, and Wolverine just moved into Deadpool's apartment. So Wolverine is in a much better position to end up with Deadpool than Vanessa is.

It's also good to note that everything we got in this movie was fought tooth and nail for by Ryan Reynolds and the movie's team. There is every chance that Deadpool and Wolverine's relationship would not be implied but rather outright in a world where studio opinions don't matter.

Everything that I've just described is not queerbaiting. A movie with queer people in it canonically, is not queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is when media sells a character/relationship as queer in order to get an audience and then tells that audience that they are not actually queer (usually done incredibly insultingly, think Sherlock). Marvel and Disney do not need to market towards queer people to get an audience, in fact marketing towards queer people is more likely to lose fans, and gain hate. It's also important to note that the marketing hasn't been marketing these two as queer, they aren't almost kissing in material, the cover is a friendship charm, the most they do is address the fact that Wolverine/Hugh Jackman is hot af. So it literally isn't queerbaiting.

Now, whether or not someone is disappointed in the level of queerness is completely up to the individual! Everyone is welcome to their opinions and feelings about the movie, disappointed or delighted. But a movie is not queerbaiting just because you are disappointed.

[sam-keeper]

Halloween Film: Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)

I always loved the ending of the 1956 Invasion of the Body Snatchers, the classic sci fi film about replicant humans being grown from strange alien plant pods and taking over society. Well, I loved what was the ending, before the nervous studio tacked on a prologue and epilogue giving the film an optimistic (and contrived) conclusion. You know, where the main character runs out onto the road, desperately trying to halt oncoming traffic, to get anyone to listen as he cries, into the night, and finally directly into the camera at the audience, "They're here! You're next! YOU'RE NEXT!" For all the film's been interpreted as expressing red scare paranoia about communist infiltration (and even that's contested--others see it as a cry against McCarthyite witch hunts), the sheer manic shrieking energy of that finale lodged itself in my brain ever since I watched the film as a teenager. It was fearful, but it also was relatable, almost a kind of perverse power fantasy. Imagine, just imagine, screaming out from every theater screen and tv set: don't you see what's happening all around you? Look away from the screen if you like--they're already here!

The 1978 remake is actually a weird kind of precursor to our new phenomenon of the rebootquel: a short ways into the film, the main character of the original (literally--it's Kevin McCarthy, the original's star) slams into the car of our protagonists, ranting that blood curdling monologue. In this version, however, the pod people swiftly dispatch him off screen, and we get a creepy shot of a crowd of them standing silently, dispassionately, over his bloody broken body. That sums up the film's sense, contra the original, that it will already be too late by the time anyone notices anything wrong.

What a creepy film this is. It's astonishingly shot, full of striking images and brilliant camera work. Like, if you want reflections and shadows and distorted views of characters to feel fresh again, like they're more than hackneyed metaphor but really, viscerally unsettling, this is the film for you. There's a pervasive sense throughout that the worst has already happened, the world already gone strange when you turned your back. Instead of zombified mania and violence, there's a flatness to everything, a cool impassivity. The cast enhances this impassive flatness through contrast: it's a film full of brilliant weirdos as heroes. Scope Jeff Goldblum in this, for example, as a self absorbed neurotic owner of a mud bath house, and Veronica Cartwright as his Star Child wife. Even the relatively well adjusted main couple has their oddities: early in the film Brooke Adams as Elizabeth has a moment where she does this, fuckin, crazy thing with her eyes to make her friend Matthew laugh that's genuinely very funny and unsettling, and it immediately lends her character so much off beat humanity. These are people who have dedicated their lives to the department of health and they've got the zealotry that comes from being genuinely a bit of a weirdo for both bureaucracy and science. Indeed, Elizabeth's husband gets replaced early in the film by a pod she brings home to study out of pure curiosity about the world.

Elizabeth, soon after realizing there is something fundamentally wrong and alien about her husband, remarks to Michael that San Francisco feels suddenly strange to her, like an alien environment full of alien people. I feel this sometimes in Seattle. Oh, everywhere, but pronouncedly here, interacting with boomer or gen xer artists in my area who casually talk about the homeless like they're subhuman, with people on the street who will freely monologue about who we need to cleanse from the city, with our repulsive mayor and city council who verifiably think I and queers like me are disgusting. You get to thinking, or at least I do, that surely people don't have that much cruelty in their heart, and then you run up against the flat casual way a stranger will condemn a fellow human to oblivion, simply for the crime of being an unpleasant reminder of poverty. Every supposed red line gets crossed--local leaders pump money into already bloated police budgets, people shed their masks, politicians race to be the most xenophobic and border-paranoid, and the state department and media shovel dirt on the fire of each exploded Gazan hospital or butchered aid convoy. Am I supposed to feel secure in this tough new environment? All I hear is the panicked cry: YOU'RE IN DANGER! YOU'RE NEXT!

Donald Sutherland's character Matthew has a belief in institutions that's at once charming and completely exasperating. He's a health inspector who clearly cares deeply about doing his job and doing it well, and so is almost totally unequipped to respond when every social system transforms into a weapon to hunt and replace him. The number of times this man calls the police, often seemingly out of civic duty!! Meanwhile Leonard Nimoy plays a psychiatrist who manipulates and shepherds the cast. He's a pod person, of course, but it's totally unclear whether he was one the whole time or became one late in the film. The suggestion seems to be that it doesn't matter: his role as a professional is to smooth over social ruptures and keep the state of things running as stress free as possible, so he seamlessly adopts his role in the new dispassionate world order. I can't stop thinking, too, about a scene where Matthew and Elizabeth are caught out pretending to be pod people because they react with terrified revulsion to a homeless man who's accidentally been grotesquely fused with his pet dog. The pod people, of course, do not react to this sight, but go about their business. All that seems to have changed in pod person world is that the whole machinery of society carries on without emotion or meaning. The horror is that instead of ending, the world just keeps going.

Sarah and I discovered after watching that there's two other takes on The Body Snatchers, one in the 90s and one late in the Bush era 2000s. I guess that means we're about due for a new generational interpretation of the story. It's not quite like clockwork; maybe it's more like a seasonal bloom. Every 10-20 years, someone feels a compulsion to run to the cinemas and shout, to anyone who will listen, that they're already here, the pod people have already taken over while we were sleeping. And maybe they already have.

Check out more short reviews on my Patreon

[averycutesalamander]

i just wanna add to ur smau that boothill maybe leaves hate comments on ipc posts???? bc official hsr on hoyolab posted a pic about jade's timeline and there is an ipc ad featuring jade, under which boothill commented "Oh fudgin' wubbaboo, why's the algorithm recommending this to me! Fudge you!" idk what he's exactly like in ur smau but thought this is a fun fact to share :)

THAT IS SO FUNNY AVAVDBBASBDB ??? I HAD NO IDEA I NEED TO HUNT THAT DOWN

i honestly imagine that he doesn't really look at other people's posts much at all (obviously this is made suspect by in-game events but hear me out.) maybe he occasionally scrolls his front page if he's extremely bored in a circumstance where he can't practice shooting?

buuuuut he could totally see an IPC-sponsored post when he opens the app to post something new and he completely blows a gasket about it. he leaves a comment on it with a million different censored swears. someone screenshots it and the silvergun fandom once again loses their mind because there's absolutely no record of him ever commenting before that's known to fans.

a week later he comments on a post of Jade on some luxury starship and all he says is "💥💥💥" and naturally the theorycrafting quadruples. is this a threat?? a diversion?? some extremely weird flirting tactic??? everybody gets their answer an hour later when the starship fucking EXPLODES. Jade doesn't die but a literal shipload of IPC higher-ups couldn't get out in time. IPC shills start a movement to cancel him ("#NotAllEmployees !!! many IPC members are very charitable and kind and fair as long as you ignore the war crimes and the slavery and the "unconfirmed" political assassinations and the--") but 99% of the people posting under that tag are people making fun of the whole thing. the moderators ban the tag and issue takedowns for a ton of mocking posts for "misinformation." all of the mods are accused of being IPC sellouts.

he gets banned again and his next returning post is the first full-body photo he's ever uploaded. he's holding a MASSIVE classified (well. now declassified) IPC weapon in one hand and making a thumbs-up with the other. he's holding the fucking thing like a fish and grinning like a moron. 2 minutes later he posts a picture of the entire thing shattered to pieces. it kind of looks like it has bites taken out of it. suspiciously human-sized bites, in fact.

the new account gets banned in like 10 minutes flat but that was enough time for the pictures to be re-uploaded a million times. the silvergun fandom has an unprecedented resurgence because a fuckload of people start making edits and art and shit. RPF is made about him. horny RPF is made about him. inexplicable enemies-to-lovers RPF is made about him and Jade. he actually appears in the comments of one of those fics and leaves a death threat. the silvergun fandom enters a golden age of thirst. his comments and DMs are flooded with people giving him tips and info about potential next targets, many of which are fake but some of which are genuine. the branch of the IPC responsible for media control is frantically scrambling to get a hold on this insane phenomenon but no matter how many times they ban him he keeps fucking coming back. determining which one of the "silvergun#####" accounts is legitimate at any given time becomes an olympic sport.

and he just keeps posting nature pics like none of that shit ever happened. decoders lose their fucking minds trying to figure out the "secret messages" in all of his uploads. one of the most popular decoding accounts gets outed as being an IPC employee. he posts a video of a fish in a creek and everybody becomes convinced that he's signaling that he's going to visit an ocean planet. he doesn't. a gargantuan amount of shitty bigfoot-esque hoaxes pop up of people "seeing him" in various impossible places where the photos are conveniently blurry. the IPC wastes a truly insane amount of money trying to figure out if any of them are legitimate. the singular legit post completely flops because they had zero followers and used the wrong tag. boothill comments on it with "🤫😉" and literally no one believes that it's one of his real accounts except the original poster.

[ao3-top-batfam-ships-bracket]

Hi, prev anon venting about the Timkon vs Batjokes poll here: would actually find it very interesting to read some analysis on the rising anti mentality, actually. I've been in fandom for a long time, so I do remember when it wasn't like this, and for a while I was like "it's fine, just block and move on, don't engage, it's fine". But IS it fine?? Fans of more complex and not easily digestible ships... we block and ignore and create our own little niches, but at this point I've seen too many cases of shippers saying they're AFRAID of publically liking something darker just because they might get harassed. This shit is getting genuinely harrowing to real alive people, to the point where some poor fans actually buy the bullshit of "you're a bad person if you like That Bad Ship" as if thought crimes exist and we're in the damn 18th century. It's definitely worth studying this phenomenon in fandom because then maybe we can figure out how to fix this? Fandom is supposed to be fun... Lol, really long way of saying that those texts would be cool to see, thank you guys!

Sure!

Here's a huge library of sources about media literacy, lgbtq+ issues, fandom and fan culture. We definitely recommend checking it out!

Under the cut is the list of articles focused specifically on the phenomenon of antishipping. Please keep in mind that some of these articles are master's theses or doctoral dissertations and that we didn't fully read all of them. This is just a general list of what we've found.

Aburime, S. (2021). The cult structure of the American anti. Transformative Works and Cultures, 36.

Aburime, S. (2022). Hate narratives, conditioned language and networked harassment: A new breed of anti-shipper and anti-fan–antis. Journal of Fandom Studies, 10(2-3), 135-155.

Bradburn, M. (2023). Fans Like Us: Anti-Shipping, Othering, and the Reauthoring of Fandom (Master's thesis, The University of North Carolina at Charlotte).

Drouin, R. A. (2021). 'Fans are Going to See it Any Way They Want': The Rhetorics of the Voltron: Legendary Defender Fandom. Bowling Green State University.

Larsen, V. (2021). It makes me, a minor, uncomfortable. Media and Morality in Anti-Shippers’ Policing of Online Fandom.

Salsabila, J. A., & Sulhin, I. (2024). Social Media And Moral Panic: Examining The Case Of Antis Fandom On Social Media X. Eduvest-Journal of Universal Studies, 4(5), 4138-4150.

Stone, A. A. (2023). The Antagonistic Anatomy of Anti-shippers: A Thematic Analysis. City University of New York John Jay College of Criminal Justice.

Urbańczyk, A. (2022). Finding a Dead Dove in the Refrigerator. The Anti-Shippers’ Call for Exclusion of Sensitive Content as a Means of Establishing Position in the Field of Fan Production. Przegląd Kulturoznawczy, 53(3), 404-420.

(Also, adding this screenshot of the table of contents from Larsen's article because it's very funny.)

[theflameisgonee]

was thinking about romances yesterday as one does and particularly mourning the fact that i've not been able to find any good poly ones lately - the ku girlies are particularly monogamous - so i was pondering that

i ALSO started thinking about that phenomenon of reddit posts, i'm sure you've seen them, where the husband wants to open the marriage and the wife is incredibly reluctant in agreeing, but then she's the one who ends up going on tons of dates and maybe getting a boyfriend and being happy, and the husband is now upset bc he hasn't had any dates and she's happy and now he wants to close the marriage again

anyway i combined these two thoughts and tried to think of how to make the concept with a happily ever after and less heteronormative and i arrived at this which has been delighting me:

character A convinces character B to open their marriage. there's is absolutely more nuance and discussion and communication and boundaries established in the course of this than the reddit post situations like the whole act 1 of the romance okay.

also, not in like. a regurgitating therapy speak way. that drives me nuts sometimes. it should be stumbling and confusing and probably uncomfortable at times!! we gotta create tension to get to the hea!!

act 2 we see both our mains!! going on dates!! and like a mix of good and bad for both of them!! but also we start building on this idea that character B is actually having a good time with this but character A is probably not. and can't figure out why bc what they ARE enjoying is seeing their spouse have a good time dating

aside for a particular scene im rly loving envisioning is the two of them debriefing post dates and having a genuinely silly fun time talking to each other about it

the break bad i think is character A going on a date with someone who by all accounts should be great for them, and it's a good date, but they just. don't. want to. and they like this person and have a fun time but there's no romantic spark - idk details

the important thing is like. character A realization that oh my god this whole time all they really wanted. was to have more friends to hang out with.

(i do think it would be particularly funny if character A was a man and ended up accidentally on a "date" with a lesbian and had to unpack why he was so relieved that it was actually a friend hangout the whole time)

i think we can get one (1) dash of intentional miscommunication where character A doesn't want to tell character B that actually they don't want to date other people but they do want character B to keep dating other ppl bc it makes them happy to see them happy etc

also fun if character B at this point has a steady additional partner and character A genuinely likes them and wants to be friends with them so bad

they do talk about it tho and it's like. the weirdest not-fight fight that eventually just breaks down into nothing bc they're both arguing the same side just saying it differently and then they realize what's going on and just. have to laugh.

anyway the happily ever after is that like. character A gets more friends and a better understanding of themselves and character B gets another partner or partners and everyone is rly happy together the end

think this is also born out of all the poly romances i read being closed triangle relationships and like cool yeah good i love that but also i would love to see some lopsided poly where everyone is happy and thriving!!

[charles-leclerc-official]

Maybe i am just uptight but i genuinely think that so many of leclerc's fans (especially the ones on twitter) are too parasocial and feel way too entitled to shit. at first i didn't really mind the comments about the filter on his photos bc i did agree yeah they could look better, but to repeatedly shit on antoine for it (even if jokingly) in spaces where they are known to lurk is a little 😬 i don't know if antoine finds it offensive and i won't be offended for him but the idea of a group of fans being so comfortable with shitting on charles and/or his entourage (yes i am also talking about fans who are vehemently against his facial hair, style, etc) online knowing they probably see it... it's just a massive ick for me. i don't want to claim offense on anyone's behalf bc for all i know they might find it funny and decide to keep doing it just to piss them off but just the entitlement and lack of social courtesy these people have is astounding to me tbh.

because you aren't friends with charles leclerc, not the way he is friends with antoine, joris, or whoever 😭 a lot of fans don't understand this and feel entitled to say whatever they want about charles and his entourage and think it's okay because "it's not that deep"

It's things like this that make me very happy to no longer be on F1twt.

To your point, I think his filter is fine(I don't mind it, I think it's nice, idk as nice as a filter is. I prefer unfiltered pics but that's just me. But the filter isn't ugly ppl are just too up their pwn butt about it) some people just nitpick things to death. It's the same with his clothes or facial hair etc, people want him to appeal to their taste and sense of style or whatever and that really feels like it's ignoring the fact he's a whole grown man who probably likes all those things.

I don't know if there is a specific term for this but I know there's this phenomenon that fans of a piece of media/musician/celeb are far better at also hating because they are so informed on the topic. Haters from the outside don't really know most details so they just say the basic hater shit about something, the real cutting haterism comes from fans because they actually know more.

Now I would say that getting too up in arms over this would stray into parasocialism too(as you said).

I have a very simple policy that I try to follow. If you like a celeb don't say things about them that you wouldn't say about your friend. Not in a parasocial way, but supposedly you like this celeb, so afford them the same courtesy you would as for anyone else you care about. It's just polite. (I guess just be nice to people you don't know who are just minding their own business)

Would you constantly bully a friend over their choice of insta filter? I sure hope not. Not everyone likes the same aesthetics, that's fine.

I feel like people have become very comfortable just saying whatever online because there's this sheen of anonymity, and this goes beyond like just Charles or even F1 social media spaces, people just seem more comfortable being mean in online spaces. It sucks.

You can really tell F1twt is out of things to talk about.

In any case, you don't have to like his choices of aesthetics, but seriously what are you even doing if you don't have something nice to say? I feel like a gradeschool teacher saying this but seriously, why do people think their opinion on this matters? It doesn't. You don't like his insta filter? Do you want a medal? Should we call Jacques Villeneuve?

[mysteryanimator]

Animatic Breakdown/storyboard rambles

You can watch it here :D

I know it is super silly but I really like geeking out about media analysis and it's a good wind-down for me since this did somewhat take some creative juice. Also, it acts to look over and kinda reflect over on how to improve stuff!

The breakdown will be slightly of order so I can be more concise with drawing toward specific parallels because there's a bit!

Right off the bat, I had initially planned about 20 seconds for this animatic. It did jump to 2 minutes due to an additional story I thought would strengthen it- but this meant what I wanted to show all had to count. So with that in mind:

This framing was really important for me to hammer into your face. To point out, every time this framing occurs, Mizrak is boxed and trapped in by some external force- until that last frame with his boots, to which his body has control of the frame. I might've gone overboard though I'm not entirely sure HAHAHA.

Even the cameos I wanted to make sure had some intentionality because these people were nice enough to give in ref pics and were interested in it!

You might be wondering "what on earth wdym intentionality with cameos?" Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon, aka frequency bias/frequency illusion was something I really really wanted to play around with super briefly. Which funnily enough, the people who happened to ask, were able to fall into the concept I wanted to play with.

Mizrak's hair is curly. Mizrak's hair is also cropped- by this point I had to bring in an oc to vaguely resemble Olrox to continue that subliminal messaging that Mizrak is genuinely plagued by the thoughts of him and Olrox. While verbally or even mentally, he never acknowledges it- his thoughts are omnipresent. No one is a replica of Mizrak and Olrox, they just make your head turn, and make you think.

Which also, you could argue then that MONK BLUE falls into the frequency illusion because he does end up accidentally adopting the features of Olrox when simplified. I noticed that from the very start and I almost took him out because of the similarities before deciding to just keep him LOL. I still think it's really funny this ONE BACKGROUND CHARACTER has screen time just because he stood next to him and I decided he was going to be the one most suspicious of Mizrak.

(Briefly, I'll mention, MONK RED, is an old OC, he is the head guard in some fantasy world I made up and that's the only reason he's here HAHAH)

This is where I introduce the held shot, and it happens in other shots so bear with me here and it'll make sense, hopefully! So these shots hold for an awkwardly long time. While music does mask how long it is, Mizrak is just standing there. Thinking. Even when he's the main focus he's still. We know he's thinking but he's choosing not to verbalise a single thought- and when he does, we know there's so much more to it than what he says.

This shot was very intentional because this is the last time you will see Mizrak's face unobscured for this animatic. This is one of the reasons why this animatic jumped from 20 seconds to 2 minutes. I wanted the lack of his face (especially his eyes) to leave an impact.

Also, its a hint to "we as an audience will be blocked from seeing Mizrak's personal thoughts, and if we ever do get a glimpse we will be forcibly be shut out as soon as possible"

SO, eyes are an important thing I decided to run with here! Close-ups of Mizrak's eyes are only shown twice. Once near the beginning and secondly near the end. Even then it's a side profile under different lighting condition and different expressions.

Which you might be asking "why is the only frame of Olrox below Mizrak???" In a close up of Mizrak's face, the most detailed thing in it is his eyes, therefore naturally we draw our focus towards it. He's already looking down, which means our eyes will follow to where Mizrak is looking at. This meant putting Olrox where our eyes would naturally land. Olrox looking back up would allow for the eye to go back to the original spot so when I abruptly cut to Mizrak's mouth, it's not too much of a headache.

... I hope that made sense, if not, here's it in gif format!

Like that :D

Also since it is just an extreme close-up, it allows for an open interpretation of this glimpse of Olrox. What is happening here ??? I don't know you tell me :)))) Why is Olrox looking up like that :))))) Sometimes if you leave it to the imagination, the audience is just forced to wonder what happened. I'm not letting you into their most vulnerable deepest moment lol, that's all I'm giving you. Though also I wanted the audience to feel like they were shunted out because it gives the sense of "WE WERE GOING TO GET MORE BUT THESE MONKS DECIDED WALK IN"

SO Mizrak's mouth is important because he barely says a thing.

Also I like to find different ways to portray interactions, specifically reactions to dialogue- so for here I wanted Mizrak's restraint to be a huge focus. Silence and stillness in video and audio formats are very powerful in storytelling. Also also if I were to animate this, I won't though, I am absolutely finding a way to avoid animating little sections so more important sections get prioritized, say if I were to animate a action fight scene LOL. Therefore I personally lean heavily into composition and framing to do my storytelling rather than the choreography of moves. (However that is not to say framing and choreography cannot be mixed, they are an ungodly combo when mixed, I'm not very strong in mixing those yet)

This top down shottttt. I do this a lot in my boards LMAO, it personally conveys a lot for me and it feels like we're an audience perched up in a corner just watching something unfold. Like unseen observers. It also in turn just ends up making the characters in a weaker vulnerable situation. Especially here. I wanted Mizrak to feel absolutely corned, backed into a wall. Not only by characters but by the building too.

Though I'm like 100% sure there are different ways I can iterate on this top-down view I need to find a new dynamic angle to latch onto HAHAHA.

Which to note MONK RED always has his arms crossed, he's not prepared to attack, while MONK BLUE is always resting his hand on the sword from the get-go. Hopefully, this establishes what their dynamic is towards Mizrak from the start without knowing who they are beforehand.

Also yes the shadows are fangs and very subtly a tongue that was super intentional to make fun of the line MONK RED says. It made me lean heavily more into having shadows matter more. So yes, characters are backlit very intentionally. Faces being half shrouded in shadow? Also very intentional.

Yes, it was intentional that a shot of Mizrak's mouth goes to a shot where the shadow makes a mouth shape.

I knew I had to have this shot here, just to make Mizrak's silence so much more obvious to the point it's borderline violent. I think this framing is really cool and it does have the sword show up to continue giving the sense of being prepared to stab someone in the back. Also, this is a slightly high angle. If there was a camera here, it would be slightly tilted up, making the threat more imposing.

So this is the second reason to why my original storyboard jumped from 20 seconds to 2 minutes- I wanted to subvert the original the border frame I was going for because by this point I think subconsciously you can feel it already. I wanted Mizrak's answer to be really odd and let that weight carry on far longer than it should to make the audience go "...huh what was that answer???" and start questioning Mizrak too (hopefully). I wanted him to go around the question, both in a verbal manner and physically having him walk around the characters instead of through them.

The rest of the boards that follow after have all the characters off to the side because something is off. Therefore I wanted the balance of the scenes that follow to be off-center. Even if visually they are balanced for a second, it doesn't last long at all. I wanted people to hopefully feel the shift from the pre-inquiry about why Mizrak was late and post-inquiry.

I think I could've been a lot stronger with the 'off' sense, but also I didn't want to push it too far because I didn't want alarm bells- I just wanted to plant seeds of doubt to fester.

Originally this board was going to be super comedic- but I went with a different route, but it still kinda smuggled itself into a few places!

I wanted the swords to be fully shown, it was really important to me it was in the shot. Yes, that includes Mizrak's dagger. I wanted to just hang over the sense of danger, the ability to just start attacking each other once again, but instead, they're stalking each other like prey.

SIDE TANGENT- all the monks have their swords on the left while Mizrak has his kilij (specific sword he has) on the right. He stands out massively design-wise from all the other monks so I wanted to hopefully have that be really prominent here too, since right now, he's the odd one out in this interaction.

So here, the camera is dragging off the characters, which I hoped to allude that MONK BLUE is not listening at all despite looking at him. We as the audience are the camera, so by forcibly dragging the camera off MONK RED, I am trying to drag the attention off him so we get into the mindset of MONK BLUE.

Also this line, I wanted to jab at Mizrak and I wanted from the get-go to make everyone uneasy. Also also just from ten billion watches of Nocturne, I noticed that Mizrak has a lot of 'guard dog' allusions, so I wanted to throw that here. Especially since the rest of the panels have just been of Mizrak's jaw.

I wanted to experiment with something slightly comedic and I also wanted the feeling of being unwilling dragged back into a conversation we shouldn't be having. I played around with it being a shoe shot, a sword shot because I wasn't to particularly fond of doing ANOTHER face shot- but I wanted to save those other shots for later, also I think it kind of played into it having cut to MONK RED and just having MONK BLUE not following at ALL.

Despite being chewed out by his fellow monk, he still holds a massive presence on the screen in a literal sense, unwavering. Mizrak is just STANDING there until he inveitentivately cracks and says something. He's holding himself back, which I was trying to hark on his behaviors from episode 04 with Olrox.

Ok yipee this frame- so every single time this pole pillar frame thing occurs- its always outside of Mizrak's control. He is now in control of it, to a point where even the camera follows his walk. Also audio-wise it connects back to the beginning with the bell :D because this frame motif was there from the very start.

Also not at me finding myself drawing shoes so much more often now, free me HAHAHA

Oh my god, it's the sword again. Except this time I make it really obvious to pair it with the dialogue. Like I wanted to whack you with that pairing and be very explicit in the message I wanted to portray. Also in the back of my mind, this was a "this foreshadows episode 08" HAHAHAH

Fun fact, this was timed to Granite from Sleep Token originally, then I played around with Playing with God, which my opinion made it more intensive. I ended up with Classical Dragon from Marcin and Tim Henson but I'm not too fond of that either BUT i do not want to have this infest my mind because there's something else I want to go board for fun.

Ok now done HAHAH, hope you enjoyed this longgggg breakdown- this was honestly me trying to get more comfortable with Storyboard pro and also the idea of the monks being suspicious of Mizrak kept lingering in my mind. I look back on these boards and i know i could improve on these a lotttttttttttt BUT hey I'm now a lot more intentional with my choices than say a few months ago AND I have a lot more variety in shots and angles yipee :D

[ducktracy]

Would what your ideal Looney Tunes x SpongeBob crossover look like?

SO! this is such a funny phenomenon, because these are the two biggest constants in my life and two biggest things i'm most protective and fanatical over. i've been asked variations of this question many times, and STILL, my answer always comes down to: I HAVE NO IDEA!

both sets of characters and worlds have such a distinct and unique identity to them that i can't really imagine mixing them together.. my brain just does not compute when i try. which speaks to how independent and strong they are as animated figureheads! their identities are so rock solid and unique that i can't simply just mash them together

I WILL SAY i've always lumped Daffy and SpongeBob (i always have to refrain from calling him Spongey or SB.. i almost never call him by his full name, just as Patrick is always "Pat" to me HAHA we're on a nickname basis!) together. they're my favorites of the two and two characters i very strongly identify with, i always talk about how i relate the most to Daffy and Porky AND IT'S STILL TRUE, but SpongeBob is such a constant in my life that i always forget how much i relate to him. he is My Guy in the vein that Daffy is My Guy though and, unlike Daffy, he has seniority since i've related to him ever since i was a little kid... and my coworkers always compare me to him through my enthusiasm and work ethic and it makes me happy HAHA. so, being Guys of Inflated Importance to me, i tend to mentally stick them together. i'm very lucky enough to say i've had people draw art of them together for me as gifts and it always makes me happy :) same with Porky and Patrick!! i've amassed quite a few Daffy and Porky as SpongeBob and Patrick drawings... the Daffy and SpongeBob comparison's a little more apt though i think, Porky could stand to learn from Pat's mellow ways. but they're both naive and pink!

i'm also realizing, the reason i'm struggling to imagine them together is because everyone in LT wants each other dead. except for Porky and Daffy sometimes. or the two sets of characters whose friendship is the entire punchline in a world full of neurotic, vengeful freaks. the LT characters all hate each other, as they should. whereas there is such a loving atmosphere with the Sponge characters--sometimes coated in cynicism! but there is an undercurrent of love. maybe i'm also biased currently working on The Patrick Star Show, because Bunny and Cecil are genuinely the most adorable animated couple ever who just love each other unconditionally and it is so sweet and i love them so much and i get emotional sometimes if i think about it too hard. they're wonderful. the love and unification of stupidity within the Star family is so strong. i don't know where i was going with this but there is a conflict of interest here. Grandpat is a cynical weirdo though and i think would fit perfectly with the LT gang. he's also a fan favorite for that reason LOL

for awhile i was always sneaking LT references into my boards though, i think the most blatant i've gotten was this very obvious What's Opera Doc grab. i honestly have snuck so much stuff in that i tend to forget what it is i've put in until i'm reviewing my boards months or years later and am like "HEEEEEEEEY WAIT A MINUTE". i don't like to be too overt with my references because i don't intend anyone to actually catch them, they're just for my own self satisfaction and a way to honor my animated forefathers HAHA so this is the exception to the rule

WAIT i was looking for screenshots to add below for something and i just proved my own point here, i forgot i did this. curse me, past me!

i have had dreams about sneaking the LT characters into my episodes though, i remember i once had a dream that i somehow put Porky into Kamp Koral and nobody cared. he was 2D and everyone else was their normal CG and nobody cared. he didn't even have a water helmet. i know i've dreamt that this has happened more than once..

BUT. here are some silly crossover drawings i've done over the years, in descending chronological order because it is VERY evident when i didn't know how yet to draw these characters. and i'm way too attached to these guys because Cecil is the absolute complete opposite antithesis to Papa Bear in every single away and i felt so bad for even jokingly comparing the two characters. i love Cecil so much. i'm sorry Cecil

i have no recollection of the second one at all, but i'm pretty sure i drew it to test out Storyboard Pro before i started freelancing... and my goodness does it show

also i lied, this one is not the oldest (the aforementioned second drawing is) but it upsets me so much i have to bury it. actually it upsets me so much i just did this impromptu 5 second redraw. Porky would absolutely hate this image

[pillarsalt]

How do you cope with loneliness? My friends are so important to me but sometimes I feel like I can't fully relate to them anymore, and I just think about how they would hate me if they knew I was GC. I have TIF and even a few TIM friends that I love and cherish very dearly because I can see that they've just fallen victim to a toxic ideology feeding their body dysmorphia and self-esteem issues. But I can't tell them how genuinely worried I am about their mental health or send them detrans testimonies that I think they would relate to because they'd think I was some hateful violent monster that I'm not. Even the content creators that bring me joy and comfort are all so fiercely anti-TERF and it just makes me sad. I don't want to hurt anyone. I even distanced from the radfem community a bit because I felt like I was becoming too hateful towards men and TIMs when I truly believe many of the ones in my life are just trying their best and fell victim to a manipulative ideology that myself and other women also fell for. It's not that I wish I was still a TRA, because I feel much more at peace internally with my identity and my belief system, but I don't know if I can say peaking has made me happier overall. I feel like I don't fit in anywhere now. Making radfem friends helped a little bit but it's not the same as being around people I've known for years and gotten close to for reasons other than this one shared belief. I don't just want to abandon them all. And it's FRUSTRATING to see people spew misinformed fearmongered nonsense and not be able to actually help them dissect those beliefs. Feeling like the only one who sees things for how they really are, but forced to play along regardless, is just so restrictive and isolating.

To be completely honest with you, I don't have a great answer. I've been lucky to have one or two close friends at a time to whom I can tell everything, including my uncensored feminism-related beliefs. I've also been (and currently am) in friend groups with multiple people who identify as trans or are dating someone who identifies as trans, and have had to keep my thoughts and opinions to myself to keep the peace. I agree it's incredibly difficult sometimes, and I know a fair few of them would instantly drop me if they knew I was a "terf". It's kind of funny because I know some of them have an inkling of what I think about the issue, but say nothing so they don't have to fight with me. If anyone asked my opinion directly, I wouldn't lie, but I admit that I lie by omission.

It is hard to watch the ones who take the medicalization route hurt themselves. My ex girlfriend and I still talk, she's a they/them nonbinary now and despite always and still being very feminine and never expressing discomfort with her body before (including posting thirst traps often,) she wants to get a mastectomy soon. It sucks because of course after having looked into this phenomenon for so long, I'm well aware of the complications and side effects that can result from a major procedure like this: phantom pain/itching, extensive and restrictive scarring, the risks of infection and necrosis, and of course the risk of regretting having an entire organ unnecessarily removed from your body later on when it's no longer fashionable to do so. It sucks that voicing even the mere suggestion that it might be a bad idea is enough to have you shunned as an apostate. I genuinely care about her and I would feel similarly if she was having any other radical cosmetic surgery like breast implants or a BBL. At the end of the day, our friends will make their own choices regardless of how we feel about it, and the only thing we can really do is be there for them in the end.

I feel similarly to you in that I don't want to hurt anyone, only to protect people and especially women from the harms that are intrinsic to trans ideology. Unfortunately, you can't help anyone who doesn't want to be helped. Sometimes though, you can play dumb and ask questions that might get them to think a little bit more about the rhetoric they're repeating. For example, I often go out for drinks with coworkers, one of whom is a she/they nonbinary woman. One time she said something about how she couldn't be a full they/them because she's still 'girly' sometimes. I said something like "doesn't it seem kind of regressive to associate how feminine you are with how much of a woman you are? what about butch lesbians?" She didn't have an answer and brushed it off, but I could see the cogs turning a bit. Playing the uninformed normie pointing out the obvious sometimes gets them to realize how twisted the logic in trans echo chambers can be. And I think sometimes expressing your disagreement with the dogma can show your friends, who know you well and know you're a good person, that, contrary to what they've been told, not everyone who disagrees with gender ideology is an evil nazi out to slaughter transwomen in the streets.

But yes, in general, it is very very isolating to hold radical feminist beliefs. I'm sorry you're going through it. One thing to remember is, there are tons of women even in your general vicinity, who like you, don't buy into gender rhetoric but aren't saying anything in order to preserve their safety and social lives. I do believe that as the world seems to be becoming more aware of the reality of the situation, more and more people will feel able to be open about their dissent, and it will become less of a fringe opinion as the flaws in the ideology are exposed. Here's hoping I guess. Keep your chin up anon.

[kevin-the-bruyne]

Well something kind of funny just happened but I think it actually proves my point even more so here goes: I was trying to construct an argument about how the discourse around Thai branded pairs being 'real' or 'fake' is so short sighted and insular because what fans are trying to ask is "do you love and fuck each other within this rigid heteronormative lens" but what they ask is more along the lines of "are your feelings for each other real" and when people answer with a resounding 'YES!' it suddenly turns into lying when the answer to the implicit question turns out to be no.

But the truth is that the relationships between human beings are very complex and things can be intense, real and even be passionate without it falling under romance. I think this is especially true within queer friendships where being a little bit in love with your friends is at this point a widely accepted phenomenon. Anyone here whose job feels less like a job and more like a Trial By Fire knows that the bonds between you and your coworker are very, very real. And one of those jobs is acting - period. In the context of branded pairs that partnership suddenly amps up in intensity until you truly are having a very unique experience with only ONE other person in the entire world. This was of course all leading up to Krist and Singto, about how Krist really, genuinely likes Singto SO much, about that one (recent??) interview that I can no longer find where Singto said that he had to reassure KRIST that he wasn't leaving because of him - about how it's not always clear to the people experiencing the relationship itself what is truly happening between them. And part of that argument was going to include a small anecdote about a friendship breakup I had with a friend I used to do theatre with in middle-high school.

Well. This post is no longer focused on KristSingto so let's just get into the anecdote:

When I was in the 8th grade I started an unusual friendship with an 11th grader (Z) because we used to do theatre together. Many things made it unusual - we were of the opposite gender, a 4 year age gap at that age is HUGE, but also that he was a very reticent dude that almost never hung out with ANY juniors let alone female ones. But we became friends because:

1) We were scene partners, in fact, I was playing Zs secretary so every single one of my scenes was with him, I was almost never backstage without him because my entire role was following him around and saving him from the evil machinations of his adviser. We were backstage alone a lot because our entry and exit cues hugely overlap

2) I was nursing a horrible, terrible crush on a different 8th grader (B) also in the production and somehow this scary, reticent older dude was a HUGE gossip.

3) Z told me several years later that him befriending me during the production was part of a terrible matchmaking plot that the 11th graders had hatched to get me and B together because apparently our yearning for each other was difficult to witness. B had his own 11th grade buddy (the evil advisor in fact lol) coaching him. Spoiler: It didn't work b/c 11th grade boys make for TERRIBLE matchmakers.

But Z and I bonded in a way that was eye catching, part of that was because we were killing it on stage. We had amazing chemistry and we were kids so no one was coaching us to have chemistry. We just did because we trusted each other.

I cannot stress this enough that we were a comedy duo, our scenes were not even remotely romantic in nature. He was the King and I was his Jester but still people were buzzing from just watching our practices. I had unknown random girls come up to me to ask about my relationship with Z (people are always nosy about connection lol). Not only did the 11th graders FAIL but their very plot was one of the big reasons why B and I never got together because B would go on to believe for YEARS after that I was in love with Z 😭

Anyway, Z and I stayed great friends for long, long after that production and well into our adulthoods. A lot of our early years was me being sad over my unrequited love for B but I had more interests lol. We were basically ride or die and even had a marriage pact. We planned our honeymoon, we talked about what our married life would be like. We were completely platonic friends. We stayed good friends long distance for several years when I moved away for school. The friendship ended because I found out he was lying to his GF (now wife!!) about when he'd come to see me/hang out with me. And that was so disrespectful to both me and the girlfriend that I told him that we'll only hang out again if he introduced me to his GF. The reason why this never happened could have been because of a lack of opportunity since I live in a different country but we did completely stop talking after this.

Anyone who's actually managed to read all that is probably like girl your relationship was not COMPLETELY platonic. And like...yeah I'm realizing that now. Getting some clarity on a friendship breakup from 8 years ago that had caused me a lot of pain only because I started writing about it because KristSingto decided to simulate nasty fucking on stage.

Anyway, life is weird and KristSingto are about as real or fake as any other human relationship 🤷🏽‍♀️