#it's giving “it's 5pm and the sky is opening up after a good rain and you can see the puddles reflecting the clouds”

[scarecrowgoat]

sonic r isn't perfect looking but the levels are a vibe, especially with the weather and day cycle options

[kassymalone]

Allow me to share with you, dear reader, a story of what happened today. There is no lesson to be learned in this story, no deeper parable: it is merely a snapshot of a moment in time.

So Manchester City (the football team, not the city) has won the treble (which seems to be a big deal if you’re into football), so naturally this is cause for Manchester city (the city, not the team) to celebrate.

On Friday some representatives from the business improvement district came by to warn us that if City won the treble, there’d be a parade that went right by our shop. Today, that parade happened.

It was a nice day. Even on the way to work this morning, they were starting to close off the roads in the city centre. At lunch time it was 31 degrees, an absolute anomaly in the north of England, with a powder blue sky and next to no breeze.

At around 2pm they started.

The vuvuzelas.

If you’re lucky enough to never have heard a vuvuzela (and you are lucky), imagine if someone made a goose out of cheap plastic, somehow turned the volume up ten times louder than you thought possible from such a little thing, and then gave it to a small child.

HONK, HONK, HONK-HONK-HONK, HONK-HONK-HONK-HONK, HONK-HONK. If you know the song you know it. The parade wasn’t due to start until 6.30pm, but around 2pm it started.  

The workers rolled the security fences out around 3pm, closing the road directly in front of our shop. Luckily we had already made the target for the day, because our business tanked after that. Not for lack of people - the people were gathering all along the road, staking out good places.

Fast forward to 5pm. The honking in unbearable, I have to close the doors just to hear the person next to me speak. We’re packing up early because of how quiet it’s become. Outside, a sea of powder blue (the teams official colour) is lining the street, the shirts looking like they drained the colour straight from the sky. Horns are honking, people are yelling.

I look to the doors. A child has climbed a lamp post, and is sat quite happily on the crossbar. I look away. When I look back, a couple of hefty young men have climbed another lamp post. The third time I look, they’re all shirtless. The street is getting busier and busier, the door to our shop is blocked by people.

At this point, the light is changing. All the shirts that took the blue sky left an angry slate grey in its place. The temperature drops rapidly. Horns are honking, people are yelling.

Thunder rumbles.

The sky opens.

The entire crowd cheers.

Not a single person moves from the spot they’d been staking out for hours. They cheer, chant, and jump in place, but they don’t move as hail the size of marbles rains down from above.

Finally, we closed. In the time it took me to cash up the tills, I managed to miss the actual parade.

“They weren’t wearing any shirts!” the young Indian girl working with me gasped “And it was raining! They’re going to get sick!”

What else would you do, stuck on a parade float in a thunder storm because people have been waiting literal hours to celebrate you? Might as well give them a show.

It was still raining when I locked the door, and that was long enough for me to get completely soaked. The parade was gone, and everyone else is leaving too - the die-hard fans following the parade route, everyone else ducking through back alleys and side roads. A blue river of people flowing towards the buses, trains and trams, squealing and splashing through the rain and cold, wet puddles, the kind of wet you forget exists until the next time it thunders.

The bus is so busy I seriously consider just walking home. Its an hour walk, in a thunderstorm, but I think about it. By the time I reach my stop the heat is starting to return, and the petrichor is almost suffocating. Students crowd in their doorways smoking, dressed in bikini tops and shorts and talking about Amsterdam. 

I finally open the door and a ginger cat screams at me. Some normality at last.

[stephspurs]

A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

hi guys and gals! Part 7 sees friendship strengthened, decisions being made and love ultimately hurting. As always, please enjoy the next part and let me know what you think is going to happen in part eight! I actually love hearing from you all so please don't be too shy to reach out and message me - I love a good chat LOL Love always, Steph xx

Part 7 | settima parte

warnings; love sucks man. word count;  1850 writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter. next update; Monday 09/08 5pm AEST. Updates are three times/week (Monday, Wednesday & Friday)! Tags (as requested by users); @footballffbarbiex @obsesseds-world @abysshaven link to fic masterlist here

“bella amelia, cosa ho fatto per meritarmi questa telefonata?” (beautiful amelia, what did i do to deserve this phone call?) Jorginho spoke his second-native tongue down the line to the British girl, calling him way past her self-appointed bedtime of 9pm.

“Jorgi, ho bisogno del consiglio di un amico” (Jorgi, i need the advice of a friend). Amelia, almost desperately, pleaded down the line to the boy who became her therapist.

It had been a few days since Amelia & Jack’s facetime where they sat and listened to the countless offers the successful girl had waiting in her voice message inbox. Being the person that she is, Amelia needed to distract herself from obsessing over the messages so she threw herself into her job. Spending too many hours over her paid allocation at Juventus training ground, getting administrative work done for the season ahead.

Was this her way of nesting? Or empty-nesting? Was she subconsciously preparing the club and her boys for life without her? Getting them ready with a season's worth of set pieces and tactical plays that would secure them an outstanding 37th victory? On the flip side, was she preparing for her new role in England which she had yet to accept. There was no harm in her taking her intellectual property back over to the motherland. The two clubs did not compete in the same tournaments, perhaps only the Champions league - but who's to say that whatever club she does pick will make the Champions League? There was no doubt Juve would be there - all of her preparation would ensure they would be. Whoever took over her role simply just had to show up and keep the boys in line.

“ok tesoro, parlami.” (Ok darling, speak to me). The Italian settled onto his couch, espresso in hand, waiting to hear the younger girl's problem.

“So I've spoken with Kyle & Jack now, and have told them of my predicament. They both are very heavily favouring one side - but I need a voice of reason. If you happen to express the same sentiments that they both did, then maybe that's all of the reassurance I need to make this final decision.” Amelia switched back to her native tongue.

After spending the better part of an hour discussing in great depth the offers that she was receiving from the 5 english clubs, Amelia felt just as confused as she did before calling the Chelsea boy. No surprise that Jorgi was team Come to the Prem & Join Chelsea, but the italian midfield maestro had also brought her back down to earth from cloud nine and reminded her of what, or who, she was leaving behind.

“Now I don't like telling you what to do, but you need to discuss this with Fede, Amelia. He doesn’t deserve a lot of things, but this is something he does.”

So that's where Amelia found herself the next morning. Sunday’s in Italy were reserved for espresso and long walks in the sun. This particular Sunday must have been reflective of the internal turmoil she was facing, uncommon for the season, the sky above her was overcast and a light drizzle had started to set in on her walk to the charming Italian’s townhouse.

______________________________________________________________

“pensavo fosse un mito che gli inglesi portino con sé il tempo the” (i thought it was a myth that british people bring the weather with them) Fede said as he opened the door, and his arms, while looking down the two steps at me.

“Very funny” I said as I gave him a hug. He always was so good at hugs. I’m going to miss them. Snap out of it Amelia - you don’t even know if you’re going to go yet. Oh she knows she's going. She also knows what club she's going to. No she doesn't, you be quiet. I’m here rooting for her Italian romance. If I had an angel and devil on each shoulder, their conversation would speak my internal monologue as such.

Walking through to his kitchen, putting on a coffee and saying hello to his dogs, Fede stood in the doorway and watched me move around his kitchen as though it was my own.

“I’m convinced you got British bulldogs because you just can’t help but love the English” I cheekily smiled up at him from my crouched position in the middle of his kitchen, giving the two bullys the best head rubs.

“Sure, you keep thinking that Amelia” Oh, the way he says your name Amelia, so foreign, so romantic. He says it the same way any other Italian would say it, he’s nothing special. Be quiet, let them have their moment.

“Lets go and enjoy these out in the courtyard, is your sun shade still up? It should hold out the rain right?” Amelia spoke rushedly as she poured two espresso cups and walked towards his back door.

“Tesoro, why are you so unsteady today? Is something troubling you?” Fede spoke worriedly, noticing my little nervous habits coming out to play and speaking faster than my mind could comprehend. Better to just get this over with i think, for once we agree on something.

“Ok i need to tell you something, and i need you to let me get it all out before interrupting me. Can you do that? This is something i’ve been working up the courage to speak out loud, let alone speak it to you”

Fede took a sip of his espresso, holding my eye contact, before putting his cup back on its saucer and leaning forward, elbows on his knees. He thought he was ready for what i was about to say, expecting it to be yet another long winded speech as to why i want to put a label on our situationship. Oh boy, how wrong he was.

“After the success of the european tournament, i have received a lot of praise and recognition for my skills”

“And you deserve every bit of it amore, every bit and even more” Oh dear, could my heart hurt anymore?

“Fede, I asked you not to interrupt me…”

“Ok ok, sorry, continue”

“So, I have received a lot of recognition both here in Italy as well as from my home country of England. In saying that, I have received a few offers from clubs in the premier league that want me to bring my approach, the italian approach, to the english game. It's a real step up in my career and it's something I am seriously considering. I’ve spoken with some of the boys back home and also Jorgi, they all think that this is the next step for me. I’m far too comfortable here, I can't grow in my comfort zone. I think I'm ready for a new challenge.”

I held eye contact with the 27 year old, I wasn’t about to let him know just how vulnerable I was feeling here in front of him. Something Fede could always do was read me, and read my emotions. If he knew how exposed I felt, how easily I could be swayed over this decision, then he would make it his life's mission to do so. I had made my mind up that I was going, but there was also a part of me that decided if he was to give me what I was after I would be open to the possibility of staying.

“So it seems that you have asked for the opinion of everyone else in your life, and made your decision, before even considering mine.” He slumped back in his chair, and rubbed two fingers over his lips while looking off into the small courtyard garden.

“Fede, I have made my decision. But I wanted to talk to you about it, I owe that to you. You have made my time here so memorable, so fantastic, so filled with love that I wouldn't even consider not including you in this.”

“Is there anything I can do to make you stay? Do you want me to ask you to be my girlfriend? To tell you I love you? To move in with me? Let me know what you need from me to reconsider this decision” He began to get frustrated with me, pulling the cap off of his head and running his fingers through his hair.

“That’s exactly it Fede! I don’t want to ask you to do that, you should ask me to be your girlfriend on your own! I don't want you to tell me you love me if you think that's what I want to hear - I want you to feel like you love me! I don’t need anyone to tell me what I want to hear, what I want to hear is what you truly feel. And if there is something i have learnt about you in the last few years is that you can’t hold back your feelings with anything! If you were in love with me it would have burst from you a long time ago. I think that you do love me Fede, but as someone to come home to instead of no one at all.”

“You know Fede, i don’t have any regrets over this. You mean just as much to me now as you did the very first time we crossed that boundary and blurred the lines. You’re just my type, you only call me late at night, you can’t decide if you’ll be your own man or mine. I hate to say it, but you really are just my type. This decision has nothing to do with you, it’s something i have come to make all on my own.”

I had stood up now, looking down at the 27 year old. I needed him to understand exactly what I was saying, how serious I was. This was the moment I could get it all off my chest, instead of just letting the relationship play out on his terms.

“I leave on Friday, I let the club know this morning. There's nothing that can be done now Fede, this is my decision. Please respect it, and me”

He stood up, his almost 6’1” frame towering over me. Looking down, face of steel, I could see everything I needed behind his eyes.

“hai ragione ti amo Solo non nel modo in cui meriti di essere amato” (you're right, i do love you. Just not in the way you deserve to be loved). He pulled me into his chest, both arms wrapping around the back of my shoulders, left hand holding my head in the crook of his neck. My arms wrapped around his back from below his arms, holding him tight enough that they crossed over and I could grab the sides of his rib cage. This was the closure I needed.

“I’ll give Jorginho a call and make sure he looks out for you”

“How do you know what club I'm going to?”

“I saw the way your eyes sparkled when you mentioned its name, it was the same sparkle that used to come out when you said mine…”

Part 8. | parte otto

[larryfanficwriter98]

Chapter Two

(Just an idea of the gifts I pictured)

Louis texts

Harry texts

Harry woke up on the tour bus feeling it move underneath him. He groaned burying his face in the pillows for a few minutes. The tour bus was the same as any other tour bus except the backroom was converted into a bedroom a few years back. The bunks were for his band and the bedroom was his. The original story when it got out was that it was for Harry's many women companions no matter how many times Harry denied it. Rolling over he grabbed his phone and saw he had a new message in the Anonymous app. He unlocked his phone and went to the app and saw it was from Louis.

Why volcano boarding?

Harry's lips twitched before he typed a reply.

Volcano ash stains are impossible to get out.

Harry watched the screen for a minute before locking the phone and rolling out of bed. He headed to the bathroom to shower and to get dressed for a day of traveling. When his phone went off he grabbed it and checked the message.

Why do it? Lost a bet didn't you?

No.

Maybe.

Okay so yes, but it looked like fun.

And paragliding?

Lost a bet.

Skydiving?

Lost a bet.

Bungee jump?

Got dared.

Double or triple?

...triple.

Brutal mates

Tell me about it. They didn't even do it with me!

Horrible mates, you've got. What about mountain climbing?

Unfortunately, that was my fault.

Figured why not...I now know why not.

Yeah? What's the biggest reason?

I'm scared of heights.

The harness digs into your balls.

Pretty sure I'm sterile now.

So what brought you to Anonymous?

An entire bottle of Wine.

I don't have many friends and haven't been able to properly date, and I'm currently traveling right now. I'll be back in England in six months and I don't know I guess I am a hopeless romantic who thought this was a good idea after a bottle of wine.

Yeah? Where are you traveling?

Different locations. Currently in Germany heading to Hamburg.

"Hey, Tommo your cereal is getting soggy." Louis jumped and looked away from his phone to look at Liam.

"What?"

"Your cereal. It'll get soggy."

"Oh. Right." Louis turned away and went back to texting Harold back but he made sure to shove a spoonful of coco pops into his mouth.

"Who are you talking to? New guy?" Louis hummed distractedly, "can I have some if your coco pops?" Louis hummed again as he slid his thumb over the keys before he realized what Liam just asked.

"What? No!" Louis looked to Liam, but it was too late as Liam was smirking and eating a spoonful of coco pops.

"Did hell freeze over or do we have a hidden box if coco pops?" Zayn asked walking into the kitchen

"Louis has a boy he's distracted by and I took advantage." Liam said feeding his fiance a spoonful of the cereal.

"Distracted enough to let you have coco pops? That's a good sign. Who is he?"

"No one. I'm hiding my coco pops again." Louis grabbed the box and held it to his chest then he looked at his phone again laughing at Harold's message.

"I have to head into work, but I'll see you, lads, later." Louis set his coco pops box down on the island and headed to the door slipping his Van's on grabbing his keys while replying to Harry.

Have to head into work. Keep me updated on that snack thief and I'll text when I can.

I'll send hourly updates.

***

Messaging Louis became one of his favorite things to do, he was often distracted by the sound of his phone going off. 8 out of 10 times it was Louis and the 2% it wasn't always made his excitement go down even if just for a moment. He hasn't told Louis he was Demisexual or a virgin yet, but not because he was scared he'd leave the conversation, but because it has never been brought up before. Truly.

He would send pictures of beautiful views to Louis and famous landmarks and Louis would return the favor with the picture of the Manchester sky. Either it is raining or sunny, Louis always had a sarcastic message to go with it. It was almost an unspoken agreement to not send selfies to one another. He doesn't know how it became a thing, but it was.

Louis would often send pictures of what he was doing like if he was doing the dishes or if he was at work then it was of the kids he watched at the daycare. The video game controller if he was playing with his housemates, or if they ordered pizza he'd send him a picture of a slice and ask if Harry wanted Louis to save him some. Harry would do the same and send him pictures of his own game he was playing with his mates on the tour bus, he'd send him a picture of his meals at restaurants. If he was playing the guitar he'd send him a picture of his Gibson.

For some reason it worked for them, it satisfied them in a way. Harry has been debating whether or not to give Louis his actual phone number so they didn't have to rely on the app, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it for some reason. He did however find himself buying Louis things from the local shops and gift shops. When his backroom got a bit too crowded in Japan, and because he was feeling bad about the time difference he went to the post office and got a box then paid for the fastest shipping to Manchester after buying a postal box for Louis Tomlinson. The security question was What is the color of Harold's Gibson guitar?

Louis arrived at the postal office still confused as to why Harry had asked him to get his mail for him. It took a few days for Harry to convince him, but eventually, he figured it couldn't hurt and he would just drop it off at the listed address anyway. He really liked Harry. He was funny and Louis had a distinct impression that he was extremely hot and he couldn't wait for them to share selfies. He couldn't wait to share phone numbers and calls and maybe even facetime.

"Name please?" The desk worker asked

"Louis Tomlinson. I'm picking up." Louis told the man who nodded and typed something into his computer

"There is a security question. What is the color of Harold's Gibson?" The man was just as confused as Louis had been at first until he heard the question

"It's a dark blue with a hummingbird." Louis told him

"He just said blue so here is the key."

"Thank you." Louis headed to the number on the key ring tag finding one of the larger boxes. He had half a mind to take back his agreement, but headed to the box and unlocked it. Sure enough, there sat a 20x20x20 box, but instead of Harry's name, it was actually addressed to Louis Tomlinson. He turned the box to read the label and his jaw dropped in shock when he realized Harry had sent it from Japan.

"That lying asshole." Louis said even though he was grinning and was kind of pleased in a way that Harry was so thoughtful. They hadn't talked about being exclusive to one another, but neither of them has talked to anyone else and they told the other one that. Louis had a feeling that Harry wasn't the type to just message five guys and Louis, after a week of talking to Harry stopped replying to the others. He headed to the desk with the box in his arms to return the key, but the man shook his head.

"It’s under a six-month rental. The key is for you to keep trying not to lose it." Louis nodded trying not to get too pleased that Harry was planning on sending him more things. He packed the box on his passenger seat then headed home eager to open his gift. When he got to the house he walked inside with the help of his ass and hips.

"Why do you have a box?" Liam asked curiously

"Because I do." Louis said as he set the box on the coffee table and opened his phone taking a picture of it and sending it to Harry. It was 9am in Manchester so in Japan, it was 5pm so Harry should be awake for another few hours. Some days he was busy though and hardly able to message which Louis understood if he was on a worldwide vacation. Louis wouldn't want to chat all that much either.

"Japan? From Harold?"

"Yeah, the little lying jerk." Louis locked his phone and tossed it to the couch before heading to the kitchen to grab a knife.

"Didn't he just arrive there though?"

"Yeah, about three days ago why?"

"You realize how much international shipping is? How much fast international shipping cost?" Louis paused and looked at Liam, "he must be well off."

"I bet it's daddy's credit card." Zayn said as he sat on the couch with Niall

"There's nothing wrong with having well off parents. Leave him alone. I actually like this one."

"Sorry Lou... you're right now open the box so we can see what he thought ya. Bet the insides are not as pricey as the shipping." Louis rolled his eyes at the gentle teasing before he cut the tape.

He opened the flaps and saw an envelope on top of the tissue paper that was hiding the contents of the box. Louis grabbed the envelope and opened it, pulling out a few pieces of paper that were folded together. Unfolding the letter he saw a messy, but somehow neat handwriting on the pages.

Louis,

I am so glad that my wine drunk mind led me through this really weird path of meeting you. You have brought a lot of joy in my life that I hadn’t completely realized I was missing. My friends and my family are all talking about how much I have changed since talking to you. You are hilarious, sarcastic, caring, and always seem to be one step ahead of me.

I'm sure the worker told you the box will be open for six months, I plan on sending a lot of things to you along my travels as long as we keep talking. I know we have exactly talked about exclusiveness and where this is heading despite both of us looking for settling down soon. I realize my situation makes it hard to meet and understand each other and I want you to understand more and more as I begin to trust you.

I hope you understand when I say I would like this to be between us. You see I am frequently in the public eye. Magazines, websites, articles, you name it. It's always been hard to meet people who are genuinely interested in me as a person either being friends or more. I don't have many close friends who I completely trust, I have a few and they're all very trustworthy, but a lot of people I have thought were my friends have used me in some way either for money or publicity.

I do not however believe you would do such a thing which is why I am telling you this. As much as I would like to completely trust you with everything, I can not and for that, I am truly sorry. I hope you understand because talking to you has been amazing and the highlight of this trip. Before I am home you will know the complete truth and hopefully, you will understand what being with me would entail in your normal lives.

Anyway, I bought you some things I have found around the local shops and gift shops. Some are cheesy crap that I thought was a good laugh while others were thought out and meaningful. I hope.

Yours,

Harold

Louis was only a tad confused, but after a second read through it made more sense. Louis folded the letter up and slipped it into the envelope ignoring the looks he was receiving before he pulled back the tissue paper. Everything was neatly and carefully wrapped in bubble wrapping even what Louis thought was a stuffed teddy which was ridiculous but cute in a way. He pulled the first item out and undone the bubble wrap revealing a Teddy bear as he thought with the German flag on the white shirt. Louis grinned as he fixed the shirt.

"Wow, a five-pound teddy. Impressive." Niall said

"Oh stop there's more in here he said there's a mix of cheesy cliche things and meaningful things. I find it cute."

And Louis meant that as he set the Teddy on the couch to grab the next Teddy. All the teddys were on top of the other items so he went through Poland, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Japan, and Russia teddy bears. All the same bear and after Louis had lined them up he took a picture of them and sent them to Harold.

"I already don't like you two together." Zayn said

"Oh let Louis get spoiled. It's cute." Liam said hitting his fiance, "what else did he get you? T-shirts?" Louis glared at him as he debated which item to grab next.

There were a few boxes that had the German flag sticker on the bubble wrap so he grabbed those. He knew when they started talking Harry was almost leaving Germany so he was a little surprised Harry bought something from the country. What he unwrapped was boxes of German chocolate and German teas. Then there were boxes of natural wooden toys safe for children and Louis grinned knowing those were for the daycare that Louis had told Harry he bought toys for regularly. He honestly couldn't wait to open those boxes with the kids and test them out so he set those off to the side making a new pile.

He then moved on to Denmark flag items which were a simple black striped vase with a note that said ''Kähler Ceramics-For Your Future Flowers''. Following the vase was a Nisse souvenir, a little mermaid figurine, Danish chocolates of course, and Danish knitted sweaters just big enough for him to snuggle into which he had told Harry he liked to do often on cold winter days.

Moving onto Norway there were more sweaters which Louis was not complaining about one bit. They were all warm and big and he knew he'd wear them often. There were some Norwegian books printed in English that fit what he liked to read. Then there was of course the Norwegian chocolate.

After Norway was Russia and the first thing Louis pulled out was a Matryoshka doll, a few beautiful Russian lacquer boxes, a few birch bark crafts, and a lot of Russian sweets and chocolate. There was a large item that had the Russian flag sticker, but Louis could get to it yet so he moved on to Japan.

The Japanese souvenirs and gifts were a beautiful set of chopsticks that looked more for display than actual eating, a few Kendama toys, a few Koma toys, a Maneki Neko, a Japanese folding fan, a few different Daruma dolls, a Wagasa, and last some sweats and chocolate.

Finally able to get the last item out which was the main reason the box had to be so big. Multiple sticky notes were saying to grab it from the bottom and to be GENTLE. Louis was grinning as he bent over and grabbed the little edges that had arrows pointing to them in sticky notes.

"Need help?" Niall asked

"He says to be gentle not that it's breakable so hopefully not." Louis very carefully pulled out the gift. Niall moved the box away letting Louis set it on the coffee table.

He gently began unwrapping the smallest piece revealing a beautiful teapot and immediately he knew. He knew exactly what this was and he was going to kill him, he was going to murder Harold as he unwrapped the matching tray moving on to what he now knew to be a Samovar.

When it was revealed it was gorgeous and Louis didn't know if he wanted to cry or scream or faint. He immediately grabbed the Samovar and headed into the kitchen pouring water into the kettle and putting tea leaves into the teapot. He then plugged the Samovar into the outlet and turned it to its highest setting letting the water boil. Once that was down he poured the boiling water into the teapot and then the tea into a mug all in the manner of 12 minutes. Louis moaned shamelessly after the first sip of hot strong tea.

"So..it makes tea?" Niall asked

"It keeps water simmering so I never run out of hot water for my tea. I've been wanting one for years, but they cost hundreds of- oh that bastard."

"LOUIS HAS A RICH BOYFRIEND!" Liam shouted teasingly, making Louis glare at him as he grabbed his phone off the couch seeing Harry had messaged him back after he sent him the two photos.

Thought they were cute and hoped you'd like the cheesiness of it.

We need to talk about that last gift Harold.

No, we don't.

Yes, we do.

Nope.

Yes.

No. Absolutely not. Not talking about it...do you like it?

It's beautiful and lovely and I've already made some tea.

Good. So there's nothing to talk about then.

No more gifts!

😳😳😟😟😦😦🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😨😨😰😰😥😥😢😢😭😭😭

Did you just send emojis explaining your sadness over my text?!?

Yes. I'm sending more for December. Your birthday is Christmas Eve Louis, I can't ignore that!

Well, how am I supposed to send you gifts if you're traveling?

Easily. You don't. 😁😁

😐🤨

😇😇

🤨🤨

(The story gets better after this chapter I promise.)

[pinsplantsandpikes]

A Stitch(wort) In Time Saves Nothing If You Don't Pick It (16/03/20)

(Tumblr decided to delete my draft so I ragequit this for two days)

The sky is bright, empty, and blue. The air is briskly cold but clean. I have so far seen a lot of Lords And Ladies, a lot of Lords And Ladies, incessant amounts of Lords And Ladies.

I am exploring lakeside today instead of in the heathland. I am determined to find some Ramsoms like the other foragers I follow have. The general advice has been waterside woodland, as old as possible.

With the recent rain there is a lot more waterside than before! But the age is potentially a problem, so we shall see what we can see and live in hope.

On the suburban end of my walk, leading up to the lakes, there has been thriving greenery starting to shrug off the grey of winter. A rife of blue flowers started to emerge as I approached the gate, leaves spotted with white, quite pretty. Alkanet or Bugloss, and in their abundance, absolutely beautiful and rather like Forget Me Not flowers for the individual heads. I should have recognised them instantly - rather than letting the app confuse me into hoping they were Comfrey - for they look exactly as they do in Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion, the game designers did a wonderful job on the plants.

Picking my way through the swampy ground I eventually made it to the path which followed a seemingly circular route, I chose to go left to start with. I passed some grumpy swans and a fisherman mired in mud to practice his craft. I don't envy the conditions but give him props for going to such lengths. Takes guts to be that close to swans, evil bastards that they are.

Continuing onward, I see some dogwalkers, numerous water based plants which look like Irises, more bloody Lords And Ladies, and wonder of wonders I find St John’s Wort--!

Not.

Of course I didn’t find anything so forageable as that. It was Shrubby St John’s Wort, otherwise known as Sweet Amber... uses, none. Cute little plant though.

Next up is Wood Avens, which might actually be useful at last! Ish. After some looking, none of its uses are really supported by science. Ugh.

All I want is to learn to find usable, useful, edible plants. It is not really so much to ask.

The next step in my journey was to decide whether or not to try and cross a flooded area of stepping stones, or stepping logs rather. The water ran over them and there was no indication how much they would sink. I would hardly drown if I slipped. I would get at worst a nasty shock, sore bum and a bit soggy. But on principle it was the risk vs reward debate. I vaguely knew my options for turning back, the right turn I hadn't yet taken that would eventually lead full circle to my origin point.

Or the waterlogged path, of which I knew nothing.

So, naturally I took to the logs, got one wet sock but otherwise survived the scramble intact. It was an adventure!

The view was spectacular, a river on one side after a steep drop, and the lake I’d been circling on the other, waterfowl taking off from the river and flying over my head. I carried along the path, excitedly looking at my feet for potential Ramsoms or other plants, breathing deeply, hoping to smell the strong stench of garlic. But nothing, just damp soil, water, and the fresh air.

It was along this path I ditched LeafSnap as my identification app. My final straw was it umming and ahhing about hogweed and whether or not it was really a parsnip. With lesser hogweed that’s not a dangerous confusion, even if it’s drastically wrong. With Giant Hogweed that is potentially lethal, given the plant’s infamous toxicity (seriously, go investigate that terrifying beast). So, instead I moved to iNaturalist, which so far has worked much better, keeping identification assumptions much more closely related, and peer-reviewed by real people when unsure. Happily trotting along I found more Lords And Ladies, brambles everywhere, grasses, dock, more of my good friend Poor Man’s Mustard, and what looked like Forget Me Nots!

Or more specifically, Wood Forget Me Nots. Gardener variety Forget Me Nots are my favourite flower, but this variation might actually leap to the top. The leaves were so fuzzy and soft. There were fewer flowers than the plant I know, but that may be the time of year as much as anything. The petals were a far richer blue, matching the Alkanet.

At this point my battery dropped below 50% so I started winding my way towards home, deliberately without turning back. I followed the muddied ground towards a swampy plain full of rushes or similar. Amongst the tall reeds there were some with what looks like bugs munching on them, fluffy little curls. When I got closer I saw that they were actually part of the Willows as iNaturalist identified them.

That’s just the family of plants, it wasn’t confident enough to narrow it down to the specific, but I’m happy with that much for something I don’t intend to touch or eat. It’s so cute though!

After the Willows I had a decision to make, with my battery running low enough it might not make it home. Either I went the wiggly way through the houses, or a straight line through some awkwardly overgrown wilderness. Just as I was weighing up these options something caught my eye. Bright greenery in a nest of dead leaves.

And in amongst the emerald sea in there were tiny white drops. Bright tiny blooms of delicately deliberate petals.

This was Stitchwort.

And it was so utterly beautiful. I’d seen flowers like that before but I have no recollection of where. They were exactly the kind of thing I wanted to see. Useful, edible, I even was developing a stitch after 80 or so minutes on the hoof at that point! But did I pick any?

No.

Because I’m an idiot who didn’t think of that till I’d already gotten halfway home, back through the undergrowth scritch scratch scritch scratch and back through the mud squelch squirtch squelch squirtch. It was only at I was opening the gate to return to the main road that I kicked myself for not getting down on my hands and knees to pick some of the Stitchwort, that I could have used it on a practical basis, tested its power. But no, my silly modern brain wanted to go home and have a banana to restock on potassium. Defying the whole premise of trying to reawaken older knowledge and customs.

But still. I know where they are. I’m pretty sure I could find my way back to that small cluster under that tree. They work well in salad apparently. Maybe I’ll do that for myself, a quarantine picnic, lockdown lunch of flowers and leaves.

Of course, yes, that’s the elephant in the room. I got home around 5pm.

Just in time to see the BBC tell me the country was on lockdown.

[holeinotomemind]

Gavin: Power Outage Date

WARNING: Smut after long build up, first time

Also posted on AO3: Here

Summary: Gavin was walking me home when it started pouring. I invited him in to wait out the rain, but he wasn't happy about my suggestion. A storm raged outside taking out the power in the building. Gavin got jealous and the night was about to heat up.

Words: 7,255

The sky opened, and it started pouring when Gavin was walking me home after dinner.

“Oh no! I left my umbrella at the office.” I looked at Gavin helplessly after digging through my purse.

He knitted his brows. It was obvious that he wasn’t carrying his umbrella either, he rarely does. He took a look at the shoes I’m wearing before saying “Sneakers. Good.” He grabbed my wrist and started pulling me into a run. “We’re not far from your place, let’s make a run for it.”

We only had to run for a block to get to my apartment building, but both of us were already drenched by the time we got there.

“Wow, that rain gave absolutely no warning.” It was dry one second, and it was a downpour the next.

“Well, the weather forecast did say it was going to rain tonight.” He shrugged.

“But I thought it wasn’t going to start until after midnight. That was why I didn’t take my umbrella when I left the office.” The interview was with a lab tech who was adamant that we finish before 5pm and, besides, Gavin always gets me home before midnight after our dinner dates.

“I’ll remember to bring my umbrella next time.” Smiling at my mild complaint, Gavin raised his hand to tuck a lock of my wet hair behind my ears. “You should go back and change to some dry clothes. You’re going to catch a cold otherwise.”

His gaze was so gentle that it felt like I was surrounded by a warm breeze. I leaned into his hand, smiling back at him.

Reaching out with his other hand, he cupped my face and slowly inched closer.

I closed my eyes, basked in his warmth, and felt his lips on my forehead. Ever since reuniting with him, Gavin always made me feel so warm and safe. It’s hard to think of him as the same wild upperclassmen I was afraid of from high school anymore. No longer did I want to runaway from him. I wanted to stay with him, be close to him, and feel the warmth from his body.

At this moment, nothing else mattered to me. I didn’t want to move, didn’t want to ruin this moment. I wished we could stay this way forever.

As if sharing the same feeling, Gavin didn’t move either, and we stayed that way for a long while.

It wasn’t until an untimely cold droplet of water dripped from his wet hair onto my cheeks that jolted me back to reality to realize that we have been standing in the lobby of my apartment building, visible to any passerby. And we’ve been like this for much longer than what was socially appropriate in a public setting.

“We’re in public, Gavin.” I took a step back, face blushing pink like the peach blossoms blooming in the Spring.

Realizing I was right, his cheeks, too, grew pink. Putting his hand on his nape bashfully, he rubbed the back of his neck like he often does when he was embarrassed. “Don’t forget to dry your hair before you go to bed.”

I giggled softly. It was so sweet that he was always watching out for me, making sure I take care of myself properly. “Yes, sir.”

He let out a faint sigh and pulled me into a tight embrace. “You need to be less cute.” I heard his soft murmur.

Releasing me from the quick hug, he turned to go. Surprised at him leaving, I called out to him. “Gavin.”

He turned his head back to look quizzingly towards me.

“Where are you going?”

“Home. I’ve got the night off and don’t have to be back at the station until tomorrow afternoon.”

“But it’s still pouring out.” It seems like it’s raining even harder than before.

Turning around, he lifted his hand to pat me on the head to comfort me. “Don’t worry about me. It’s quick to fly home.”

But won’t he catch a cold being out in the pouring rain like this? Gavin doesn’t live very far from me, but it’s not like he lives close by either.

“Why don’t you come upstairs and wait for the rain to let up first? You can dry off and warm up at my place.” I offered. Gavin’s always fantastic at taking care of me, but he never does the same for himself.

The hand he was using to pat my head froze at my offer, his face carried a look of surprised, and his beautiful golden brown eyes seemed to be searching mine for something.

“Are you sure?” He whispered under his breath.

I nodded despite not quite understanding his reaction. Of course, I am sure. Doesn’t he know that just like he worries over my health, I worry over him too?

Seeing that he is still hesitant, I took the initiative to take his hand and lead him to my home. He was silent throughout the elevator ride, seemingly deep in thought. I wondered what he was thinking about, but Gavin has a way of getting grumpy and brooding at things I don’t understand.

Fishing out my keys, I opened the door and invited Gavin in. He hesitated for a moment before entering.

Quickly going to my drawers, I grabbed the first towel in the pile and handed it to him as he was taking off his shoes and putting his backpack down by his feet. He took the towel with a strange expression but started to dry off himself nonetheless. It wasn’t until he had the towel on top of his head that I realized why he gave me the strange face.

The towel was bright pink.

I burst out laughing at the stark contrast of the bright pink towel and Gavin’s masculine face, which, of course, resulted in him glaring at me.

“Sorry. Sorry.” I quickly apologized, though still wasn’t quite able to stop my laughter. “Would you like to take a shower to warm up? I can put your clothes in the dryer in the meantime.”

Upon hearing my offer, Gavin reached out his hand and his slender fingers closed around my wrist. Gently, he pulled me close and lowered his head beside mine.

“Do you realize what you are saying?” He whispered, his voice low and coarse.

His hot breath tickled my ear, causing me to shiver. I can feel my body temperature rise, and my ears growing red.

And then, it dawned on me.

While Gavin had been to my home several times before, it was always during the day. But it was currently ten in the evening, and I had invited a grown man to my place and asked him to take off his clothes and take a shower.

Regardless of practicality and even though Gavin is now my boyfriend, what I had done can be considered very bold of me. Too bold. Especially I never meant for it to be that way.

“Gavin, that’s not… not what I…” I stammered trying to explain myself.

Reaching up with his hand, he flicked my forehead softly with his fingers, causing me to yelp.

“I know it’s not what you mean.” He sighed, frowning at me. “You are just too unaware.”

I let out a sigh of relief, but at the same time, I felt a sense of… disappointment? I was not sure why I was disappointed, considering I never meant to be suggestive or anything, but somehow I was disappointed at his understanding. Maybe it was because Gavin was always understanding. Too understanding. And just maybe, deep down, I was hoping for something to happen?

“Just... don’t let other men in your home.” He tells me, exasperatedly.

“Of course, I won’t.” I only invited him in because he’s Gavin.

Satisfied with my response, Gavin gets ready to leave again, but just as he was about to say goodbye a sudden split of silver flashes across the sky, followed by a clap of deafening thunder. I hadn’t been afraid of the thunder for a long time now, Gavin had patiently helped me overcome this fear. But this was so unexpected that I jumped from the sound.

“That was loud,” I exclaimed.

“Looks like the storm have rolled in.” He looks outside the window.

“Gavin…” I hesitated, unsure if he’s going to get upset at me for saying this at the heels of his warning. “It’s not safe to fly anymore.”

“It’s ok, I…”

“No.” I cut him off, shaking my head. “I worry about you too. I know what you just said, but it’s dangerous out there with a thunderstorm. Just… don’t make me worry. Please?”

Gavin has a habit of being reckless with his own well-being that I feel like if I don’t watch after him like he does me, he’s going to go off and hurt himself. We’ve been through enough close calls for me to know that him hurting is the last thing I wanted to see.

Perhaps he understood my worry or perhaps it was the puppy dog eyes I was giving him, Gavin reluctantly agreed to stay. “Fine. Now go dry yourself off.”

I decided to take a shower instead. I considered asking him if he wants to take one first, but decided against it knowing it would get me another lecture from him, so I grabbed a change of clothes and slipped into the bathroom.

When I got out of the shower, I found Gavin in my kitchen, pouring something from a pot to my mug.

“What’s that?” I walked towards him with a towel in my hand, patting my hair dry.

Sliding the mug over to me on the table, he gestured at it with his head. “Ginger tea. It’ll warm you up and prevent you from getting a cold.”

“Thank you.” I smiled. Gavin was so sweet and dependable. “You spoil me so much that I don’t know if I am capable of taking care of myself anymore if you’re not around.”

Gavin froze in the middle of drinking his ginger tea and looked at me. “I’ll always be around, as long as you want me to.”

He said it with so much finality that I couldn’t help but smile. It’s silly to think so, but it’s almost like he was promising me forever.

“You know you have a silly grin on your face?” He said bashfully with a slight blush on his face, clearly sharing the same train of thought.

Yes, I knew. But I was happy, and I responded to his question by a bigger sillier grin.

In contrast to the sweet atmosphere in my kitchen, the loud cracks of thunder continue to rage on outside. By the time we finished our drinks, it was evident that the thunderstorm was unlikely to let up anytime soon.

Even though he reprimanded me in suggesting that he take a shower and let me put his clothes in the dryer, ultimately that was what he ended up doing though I had to literally push him into the bathroom. It would be too uncomfortable to keep wearing those wet clothes, and if he was going to spend the night at my place to wait out the storm, he certainly can’t sleep in those clothes.

It was shortly after I heard the water started flowing that the sky flashed bright silver and suddenly everything went dark. Then the thunder roared so loudly that it felt like the building shook.

It took me several seconds to realize there was a power outage. The sound of water from the shower stopped, and the bathroom door creaked open.

“Are you ok?” Gavin poked his head out. “I think the power’s out.”

“Yes,” I jumped out of the sofa. “I’ll go get the flashlight.”

Handing the flashlight over to Gavin so he can continue his shower, I dug out some candles and started lighting them when I heard a knock at the door.

I opened the door to find Lucien smiling at me.

“The power’s out. I was worried that you’d be scared.” He explained before I could ask the reason why he was knocking on my door at this time of the night, his voice smooth, deep and dripped with honey.

“Thanks for checking on me. I’m fine, just lighting up some candles, so I don’t trip over anything.” I smiled up at him, thankful to have such a caring friend as Lucien.

He paused, looking past my door into my apartment. “You have someone over?”

“Yes, Gavin’s here.” I pushed my wet hair behind my ears, a bit embarrassed.

“Oh.” Lucien’s smile froze for a quick second.

“Gavin was walking me home after our date, and it started pouring, so we got drenched. Then the thunderstorm started and it was dangerous for him to go back home in this weather, so I told him to come in and dry off and wait for the weather to pass…” I hurried to explain myself, not wanting him to get the wrong idea.

He chuckled at my anxiousness. “It’s ok. I understand. It wasn’t supposed to start raining until well past midnight, according to the weather reports.”

I was relieved. Gavin and I have just started dating not long ago, and while I’m falling for him more and more every day, we were not at that point in our relationship where we are intimate yet. And it’d be embarrassing for others to mistaken.

He suddenly asked with what I swore was a twinkle in his eyes, “You have a change of clothes for him?”

Oh god, Lucien was correct. I haven’t thought about that. I just put Gavin’s wet clothes in the dryer, and it’ll be some time before they are ready to be worn again. And I didn’t have any clothes in my apartment that will fit him either.

Just as I was about to panic, not knowing what to do, Lucien gently patted me on the shoulder and told me to wait for him. He slipped back into his apartment, and several minutes later, came back out with a T-Shirt and a pair of shorts.

“They wouldn’t fit perfectly, but it should be better than nothing.”

“Thank you so much.” I happily took the clothes from him.

“There’s no need to thank me.” He gave me a wink before returning back to his apartment.

Staring at the now closed door of Lucien’s apartment, I knitted my brows. There was something about his expression right before he returns to his home that didn’t seem quite right to me, but I wasn’t able to put my finger on it.

As I stood in front of my door pondering, I heard Gavin coming out of the bathroom, asking, “Who were you talking to?”

“Lucien,” I replied as I closed the front door. “He was just checking up on me.”

As I turned around, I was suddenly facing a very naked Gavin with only a small towel around his lean hips to cover his most private parts. I quickly averted my eyes, but that did not stop me from noticing his muscular chest, well-defined abs, and the water droplets gliding down his torso. The dimly lit room did nothing to mask his body, but rather the candle lights seemed to have accentuated it.

My lips parted as I discreetly try to gasp for air and my heart pounded inside my chest. I could feel my face burning up in embarrassment, and yet all I wanted to do was to take another look. It was as if a small devil was sitting on my shoulder, telling me, “Gavin is your boyfriend. You can look as much as you want. No need to be embarrassed about it.”

As I struggled with what to do, Gavin strolled in front of me and before I realized he was only mere inches away. Surprised at our sudden closeness, I reflectively backed away from him, only for my back to hit the closed door behind me.

He inched closer to me until his broad naked chest was only an inch away from my face. I could smell the familiar scent of the soap and shampoo that I kept in my bathroom laced with a hint of Gavin’s own natural scent. My heart raced impossibly faster, so fast that I felt like I will go into cardiac arrest soon.

“He comes by often, doesn’t he?” He sounded nonchalant, but his voice was low, and his body language tells me he is very upset at the moment.

Oh god, I’m so going to die.

Frantically searching for a way to get out of this mess, I shoved out my hands and the contents I was holding towards him. He took a step back, surprised at my sudden action.

“What is this?” He looked down at the clothes I just shoved at him.

“Clothes.” I quickly replied. “I told Lucien you were in the shower and he was nice enough to lend you a change of clothes.”

“What made you think I need to borrow his clothes?” His face was expressionless with his thousand-yard stare, the one I’ve gotten very familiar with every time he gets grumpy.

“Well, you can’t walk around my apartment like this…” I gesture at his half naked body. “Your clothes are in the dryer, and I don’t keep men’s clothes here so…”

I trailed off as he threw Lucien’s clothes aside before he reached for the backpack resting at my feet and fished out a T-shirt and workout pants.

“I have a set of clean, workout clothes with me.” He said flatly before turning around to head back to the bathroom to put on his clothes.

I sucked in a breath of air. Being so close to the naked Gavin seemed to have robbed me of the ability to breathe properly, and now that he disappeared behind the closed bathroom doors, I can finally restore the oxygen needed in my brain to think.

He was putting his clothes on and would be out any minute. The atmosphere was bound to be very awkward, so I’d better do something about it. I wracked my brain trying to figure out how to defuse the situation and better his mood but was unable to think of anything before the time was up.

So, naturally, I decided to apologize and run away from the problem. Gavin liked to brood, but he always came around afterward, so it would be more productive if we talked about it when he was in a better mood.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you have a change of clothes with you. And no, Lucien doesn’t come over often, just once in awhile and never this late either.” I blurted out when Gavin came into the living room. “It’s getting late, the storm is not letting up. Why don’t we go to sleep? Let me lay out a futon for you. You’re tall, the sofa is going to be too short for you.”

I turned around, intending to go get the futon from the storage, but he quickly caught up to me, and before I know it, I was lifted up and planted on the sofa. I opened my mouth, wanting to protest, but nothing came out.

“I told you to dry your hair before going to sleep.” He placed a hand on his hips as if he’s scolding a child.

I wanted to say something back to him but decided against it. He was already in a bad mood, talking back will only make things worse right now. I can always plot to get back at him later. As I was about to get up to go dry my hair, I noticed that Gavin already had a large towel in his hand.

“Turn around.” He instructed me to turn away from him.

“Are you going to dry my hair?” I asked, but received no answer. Instead, Gavin gently combed through my hair with his long fingers and started taking small locks and squeezing it with the towel. I could feel a breeze, blowing softly at my damp hair. I looked towards the windows to make sure they were locked and realized it was Gavin using his evol to move the air currents in the room to dry my hair.

It was apparent that he wasn’t used to drying a girl’s hair since he was clumsy at times, but he never lost patience and was ever careful with me.

Gavin can sometimes be rough around the edges. He’s not as smooth-talking as Lucien, not as happy-go-lucky as Kiro, not as forward as Victor, but I always felt treasured when I was with him. He may get upset with me, but he would never take his anger out on me. He may pick me up and throw me over his shoulder, but he would always make sure I wasn’t hurt. He was always gentle.

A stark comparison with his firm, hard, muscular body.

Suddenly remembering how Gavin looked, half naked, coming out from the shower, my face turned bright red, my ears burned and heart started pounding rapidly again. I panicked, not wanting him to know I was thinking about and being so affected by his body, I scrambled to focus and find a way to hide it. So much so that I almost didn’t hear him saying, “You trust him enough to answer his knock in the middle of the night,” before the breeze settles.

What was he talking about? My brain couldn’t quite decipher his words.

A soft touch on my right ear, I realized that Gavin was tracing it with the back of his finger. Involuntarily, I twitched at his touch. I was ticklish there.

“Just the mentioning of him makes you blush so much that your ears are red?” A soft murmur from behind me. I couldn’t see his face, but from his voice, he sounded as if he was deeply hurt.

But I didn’t understand why. Who is this “him” Gavin was talking about? I was blushing because I was thinking about Gavin, who else did he thought I was thinking about?

Just as I was about to open my mouth to ask, I felt his hot body pressed up to my back. He snaked one arm around my shoulders and the other around my waist, pulling me even closer to him, crushing me against his chest. He lowered his head, pressing his lips against my sensitive ear. His hot breath tickled my ear, making me shiver.

My body temperature rose as an unfamiliar sensation developed around my lower abdomen. “Ga… Gavin…?” I called out his name nervously, uncertain of the situation, and wanted his reassurance.

“Am I not enough for you?” Instead of telling me everything is going to be ok, he whispered that painful question.

Before I was able to respond, I felt a sharp sting on my ear, followed by his tongue lapping over the area as if trying to sooth the pain.

Surprised at the sensation, I let out a soft moan as my breathing became increasingly heavy.

Encouraged by my reaction, Gavin repeats the action, sometimes biting, sometimes tugging my ear lobe with his teeth, but always licking those areas to make sure the small pains do not last. I raised my hand to cover my mouth when I was about to make another sound, while Gavin responded by softly calling my name as he continues his sweet assault on my ear.

Unable to take the intense sensation anymore, I turned my head away from his lips in an attempt to escape only to have him tracing his tongue down the side of my neck.

“Please, don’t run away from me.” He pleaded before sucking hard on the delicate skin of my neck.

My toes curled while I dug my nails into his arm, calling out his name.

“Shhh… I’m here.” His large hand slipped beneath the hem of my shirt, inching up towards my breasts.

His fingers traced the skin under the bottom of my bra and as if anticipating what is to come, my nipples tightened. Using his other hand, he rolled my shirt up to above my chest, exposing the front closing pink colored bra I wore underneath. I wasn’t sure if I imagined it, but when he went to unhook my bra, his hands seemed to be shaking a little.

I couldn’t help but wonder if Gavin was just as nervous as me.

I heard him sucking in a breath when he got my bra to unhook, and my naked breasts spilled into his view. Embarrassed, I moved my arms to cover them and squirmed in a weak attempt to twist out of his hold, but froze when he hissed and I felt his hard length pressing against the small of my back.

He lifted one hand to cup my face and turned it towards his. I could see the faint pink flushed on his cheeks under the wavering candle light, his eyes molten gold, filled with desire. He dipped his head and captured my lips with his. When I opened my lips to give him more access, he thrust his skillful tongue inside my mouth, deepening it.

We kissed many times since we started dating, but this was the first time he kissed me with so much hunger as if he wants to devour me whole. It wasn’t until this kiss that I realized how hard he was trying to control himself before. But now the thought of him losing that control and his deep desire for me sent a jolt of electricity between my legs, I squeeze my thighs together at the sensation.

I didn’t realize until Gavin ended the kiss that melted me into a puddle that he had tugged my wrists aside to move my arms so they can no longer cover my breasts. By the time I realized, I was already looking down at the erotic image of his hands cupping and kneading them.

As much as I anticipated this, I wasn’t prepared for the visual impact. Embarrassed, I tried to pull his hand away when I heard him saying, “Do you know how many times I’ve thought about this?”

“You… thought about… this?”

“Uh-huh.” He softly rolled my hardened nipple between his fingers and tugged. I let out a small cry, and he chuckled. “Not only this.”

“Not only this?” Brain in a mush, I parrotted.

His right hand left my breast, brushing over my stomach, making slow circles as he dipped lower and lower. His fingers lingered just above my waistband before slipping under it. When his rough fingers started to stroke the most sensitive part between my legs, my left hand grabbed on to his thigh, nails digging in.

“Yes, not only this.” As if to show me what else he had thought about doing to me, his fingers glided over my damp folds. He whispered my name again when he realized how wet I was. “Tell me, is this all because of me?”

He pressed the tip of a digit inside me and my hips bucked against his hand involuntarily. He withdrew and slowly pushed his finger back in, each time deeper than the last, while the base of his palm pressed against my clit.

“Is it?” He asked again.

It took my hazy brain a moment before I processed his words and understood what he was asking. Turning to face him, my voice hitched. “O-of course, it’s all because of you.”

Hearing the answer he had been waiting for, he crushed his mouth against mine, and his finger increased its pace thrusting in and out of me. My muscles clenched around his fingers as the pleasure builds to a breaking point. Electricity shot through my spine as my whole body shivered uncontrollably, my loud cry captured by Gavin’s mouth.

I rested my head on his chest, trying to catch my breath as he wrapped his arms around my body, holding me tight. We stayed that way for a while before he lifted my boneless body off the sofa.

He sat me on my bed, kissing my forehead as his hands went to straighten out my disheveled clothes. I couldn’t help but feel a sudden pang of loss when he was about to step away from me. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him back towards me.

He froze, probably unsure what my intentions were. I wasn’t sure either, but I just wanted him close at that moment. We stayed that way for a long moment before he placed his hands on my shoulder, gently pushing me onto my bed. His knee parted my thighs, and I felt the bed dip. He was on top of me. Bracing himself with his arms on either side of my head, he touched his forehead against mine.

“You’re so trusting it’s frustrating. It’s all your fault for being so cute.” He rasped before, once again, crushing his mouth against mine, ravaging it with even more hunger and urgency than before.

When I held him, it wasn’t my intention to continue what we’ve been doing. But his kisses were like a storm, taking everything and only stopping temporarily so that he can tug my t-shirt over my head. I had no choice but to hold on to him while he stripped me bare.

I feel even more exposed than before when we were on the sofa as Gavin looked at me from above. Once again, I tried to cover myself with my arms in embarrassment, but he had already anticipated my action. Taking my wrists and pressing them to either side of my head, he gazed at my naked body with appreciation in his eyes.

“Don’t look.” I plead. “It’s embarrassing.”

“You’re beautiful.” He whispered. Dipping his head, he captured one of my nipples in his mouth, rolling it around with the tip of his tongue. Air rushed out of my lungs as pleasure course through my body. Releasing it, he moved on to do the same to the other one while kneading my breasts. I thrust my hand in his hair, not knowing if I wanted to keep him there or wanted him to stop causing me a sensory overload.

One of his hands traced down to between my thighs. He stroked between my folds to find it even wetter than before.

Lifting himself up off of me, he swiftly took off his own t-shirt and exercise pants before settling himself between my legs. I could feel his hard length pressing against my wetness, burning hot through the boxers he kept on.

Startled by the feeling that we were only separated by the thin materials of his boxers, I started to fidget. Mistaking it for my rejection, I heard him calling my name, felt his large hands cupping my face.

“It’s ok, don’t be scared. We won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with.” He lifted himself off of me immediately, grabbing my comforter, ready to wrap me in it.

I shook my head, pulling him back towards me. I buried my face in the crook of his neck so that he wouldn’t see my face before saying, “I wasn’t scared. I was just nervous.”

Lifting himself up a bit, his eyes searched my face as if to make sure he heard me correctly, to make sure he was not mistaken. I pressed my lips over the scar on his left collarbone in response.

Reassured, he settled his hips back between my legs, his hands tangled in my hair to press me closer to him. Gavin groaned when I shyly darted out my tongue to lick at the crook of his neck, attempting to copy what he did to me that gave me so much pleasure earlier on. His hips bucked, and I mewled as I felt his hard length grind against my sensitive clit.

“Right here?” He asked. I held onto him tight as he thrust again, grinding at the same sensitive spot over and over. The pleasure kept building within me until, like thunder, it crashed through me as I cried out his name.

I held him close as I tried to catch my breath once again in an attempt to slow down my racing heart rate. He kissed me lovingly on my eyelids, my forehead, my nose, and my cheeks, hands brushing through my hair as I calm down.

As the fog slowly clears from my mind, I realized that Gavin’s hard length was still pressed against me. Although he brought me to my second orgasm tonight, he had yet to have his release, but still, he held me without making further advances.

“Gavin,” I cupped his cheeks. “You haven’t…” Blushing, I was too shy to finish the sentence.

“Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” Smiling at me, his golden eyes looked at me adoringly. “You must be tired. You should rest.”

My sweet, dear, protective Gavin. All he ever thinks about was my well-being. He protected me through dangers, took care of me when I failed to do so myself, did whatever I wanted to do during our dates, never for a minute putting himself first. Even at a time like this, he was still only thinking about me.

I realized that Gavin wouldn’t do anything more unless he was a hundred percent certain that I was comfortable with it. In fact, if it weren’t because of him getting upset, tonight probably would not have happened. If we were to go any further, it would be up to me to reassure him that we were not doing anything against my will.

I shook my head and said something that I would have never imagined myself whispering. “Would you… make me yours?” I was so embarrassed that I immediately averted my eyes as my whole face blushed hard.

It was as if time stood still for a long moment as neither of us spoke, and I was about to conclude that Gavin did not hear what I said. After all, I whispered it so softly that even I had trouble making out what I said myself. And then, I felt his fingers on my chin, tilting my head up to look into his eyes, now filled with passion.

“Do you know what that means?” His voice came out coarse, breathless.

I nodded.

“Are you sure?”

Gavin was the man I love, the man I had been through life and death with, the man I trusted wholeheartedly and more than anyone else in this world. I had never been surer of anything else in my life. I wanted to belong to him just as much as I wanted him to belong to me.

“I’m sure.” I reached up to kiss him, hesitantly darting out my tongue to lick his lips as he had done with mine before. He tugged on my hair to tilt my head back, giving him more access to my mouth as he took over the passionate kiss.

His hands roamed over the contours of my body, lingering on my sensitive spots. I arched my back, pressing my breasts against his muscular chest, wanting to be closer to him and loved the feeling of our naked skin pressing against each other.

I vaguely registered him taking off his boxers before I felt his hard length pressing against my sex again, this time skin to skin.

“If at any point you want to stop, all you need to do is to tell me.” He looked me straight into my eyes, making sure I knew I had a way out.

I nodded, knowing that he needed to be sure I understood and was a hundred percent comfortable with moving forward in our relationship.

Gavin braced his forearm above my head as he gripped his erection, guiding himself as he pressed against my slick core. Slowly he pushed inside me, and I can feel myself struggling to stretch to accommodate his size.

I let out a small whimper at the pain and his muscles locked.

“I’m hurting you.” He said in a panicked voice, motioning to withdraw from me.

I shook my head, trying to breathe through the pain. “I’m fine.” I choked out, holding on to him to ensure that he doesn’t leave. “Just give me a minute.”

He kissed my damp forehead as he waited for my pain to subside before sinking further inside me. By the time he was completely buried in me, he was also covered in a thin layer of sweat, evidence of the control he had over himself and the discomfort he must have felt for not being able to move inside me as he pleased.

“I’m ok now.” I reached up to brush aside his damp bangs covering his face.

As if he had just heard what he was waiting to hear for a long time, he laced his fingers with mine, and he began to slowly thrust inside me. Never taking his eyes off me, he was attuned to my every expression. With him moving inside me, the pain slowly turned into pleasure as I began to mewl softly at his every thrust.

Encouraged by my reaction, he hooked the back of my knees on his elbows, and his hips bucked harder and faster. No longer able to control my voice, I moan out loud clutching onto his nape. I could feel my muscles clenching tighter and tighter around him, and I knew I was close.

His rhythm became even faster, slamming deeper into me, calling my name over and over as he did.

I heard him groan at the same time pleasure took over me as my muscles convulsed around him, and my body shook uncontrollably. He held me close through my climax, and after several more powerful thrusts, I felt his warm stickiness on my thighs and my stomach.

We didn’t move from our position, embracing each other tightly as we panted, Gavin careful not to put his entire weight on me. We stayed like that for a long time, until he finally picked me up and walked us over to the bathroom to get cleaned up. My bones had all but reduced to liquid by that time, so I let him took care of me.

By the time he carried me back to bed, I could barely lift my eyelids. The last thing I remember before sleep took me over was his warm embrace and the words he whispered into my ear, “I love you.”

His POV

The storm had passed, and Gavin woke up to the birds singing outside the windows and the love of his life sleeping, snuggled up to his naked chest. His heart tightened.

He had claimed the only girl he had ever loved, the girl whom he treasured beyond his own life, as his. Just as she had claimed him as hers. He could feel his happiness overflowing from his heart, and for the first time in his life, he wished that he could stop time so he can gaze upon her angelic sleeping face forever.

He had imagined this day many times before, but never could he had imagined how it came to be. Last night wasn’t what he had planned, what he had intended at all. He wished he had given her a better experience for her first time, but he let his emotions take the better of him.

Gavin was frustrated last night at her inviting him into her apartment and to take a shower without considering the consequences. He was a hot blooded man, madly in love with her, and it was late at night. She had always been too unaware, too trusting that he couldn’t help but worry about her. Then she had opened the door to another man, who obviously did not hesitate to knock on a girl’s door in the middle of the night. Then to make matters worse, she attempted to dress him in another man’s clothes.

He was so upset and frustrated that it made his brain hazy. He was afraid that he might not be enough for the girl he had loved for so long, and he desperately wanted her to think of no one else but him. Gavin knew he wasn’t supposed to touch her like that last night, not when she wasn’t ready and certainly not when he was being upset with her, but once he started touching her, once he had his mouth on her soft, smooth skin, he couldn’t stop.

It wasn’t until after she came apart in his hands for the first time that he regained control of himself. When he carried her to her bed, he was fully prepared to be reprimanded by her, after all, she did not invite him into her apartment for this. In fact, she clearly stated earlier that it wasn’t her intention. But instead of recoiling from him, she held him close, and all his control fell apart.

Yet, he never intended to go all the way last night. They had taken it slow with their relationship, not wanting to rush anything, and everything they did last night up to that point was already a huge step for her. Besides, she deserved much better for her first night.

He had planned that when the time was right, and she was ready, he would take her out on a romantic date. He’d wear that suit she likes so much and even put on that tie she bought him, even though he hated the feel of it around his neck. They’d spend the day doing whatever she wanted before dining at that romantic restaurant she was always gushing about. Then he’d make sure she had warm clothes with her before taking her stargazing, flying up high in the sky to avoid the light pollution so they can see the stars twinkling. And then, they would stay at that luxury hotel, where the bed is soft, and he can spend the entire night taking care of her, pleasuring her.

That was why he had full intentions to stop after her second orgasm last night, even though his body was screaming for release and the material of his boxers feels like sandpaper scraping against his length. 

When she asked him to make her his, he knew he should have refused. The situation wasn’t as perfect as she deserved and since they had never been this intimate before and he wasn’t expecting it to happen any time soon, he wasn’t prepared for it. He didn’t carry around any protection on him like some men do in their wallets. But it was obvious that she had the power to reduce his control into shreds with only one simple sentence.

He felt whole with her in his arms and everything that had happened to him, every hardship he endured was all worth it, because they all led him to her and enabled him to protect her. He did not believe in fate, but he was convinced they were fated to be together. She completes him like no others could.

Pulling up the cover that has slipped from her shoulders, he pulled her even closer to him. Gently kissing the top of her head, Gavin secretly promised himself that he would make it up to her, bringing her on that romantic date they were meant to have as their first night together and, most important of all, treasure her for the rest of his life until his last breath.

[peaky-shelby]

when he sees me [7]

Pairing: Chris Evans x oc

Read: episode one, episode two, episode three, episode four, episode five, episode six

Episode seven: the one after the storm

Summary: after the storm comes the rainbow, but how long will it last?

Words: 1.600

Warnings: mentions of anxiety attack, fluff, stupid Evans

Author’s note: I’m keeping this short because I’ll probably post a second page today, cuz I’m stuck on a ship and I have nothing better to do lol. Feedback always helps, please leave some and Happy reading xx

It was his heartbeat singing against her head that woke her up from her peaceful nap. The storm had passed, the rain had fallen and now she was left with a cloudy sky but a warm feeling surrounding her. His heart sounded like the leaves do after a storm when they’re stolen by the wind and thrown away around the pavements.

It’s not that she forgot he ever came but she was still surprised to find out that it wasn’t dream, that he was actually there, holding her. That’s all she ever needed, someone to hold her and oh god he was so good at it. There was no way for her to understand what time it was, how many minutes or hours she had spent in his arms but the sun creeping in through the blankets like a thief trying to steal whatever cold was left in the room, was an indication that it was still morning.

Unlike her, Chris hadn’t lost track of time and in reality it had only been an hour since she gave in her sleep. Laura had come in and out of the room a couple of times to make sure that everything was ok and help Chris in case he needed anything at all. Sebastian was also in the living room now, watching TV with Laura.

He realized she was awake by the way her breath started to shift and he pulled her closer to him almost immediately, letting her know that all this was real. Then he sensed her heartbeat fasten like she was starting to get anxious again so he was quick to react “hey, hey, It’s ok. You’re ok, we’re in your room, it’s only 5pm.„ Chris had been through this himself, falling asleep to clear his mind and waking up totally confused about where he was and what time it was. He knew she’d be confused of the time and it would help. And sure enough her heartbeat calmed when she got the information she needed.

I’m in my room, with Chris, it’s only 5pm and I’m... ok. Im safe.

Maybe it was the sleep moving her body still but she snuggled closer to Chris, keeping her eyes closed. Chris smiled, he was enjoying this more than she’d even know. Then in a whisper of guilt she asked “why did you stay?„

“I had no other plans.„

“You’re supposed to be in Boston.„

“I’m back for the next few days.„

“You should be doing other things.„

He scoffed, his laugh stroked her cheek, letting her melt closer to him. “Like what?„

Delilah shrugged “partying?„

“I’m ok for now. I rather stay with you.„

“Why?„

“Because you’re nice company.„ “I’m broken„ she spat out. Chris sighed, caressing her arm with his finger. “I’ll leave you with scars.„

“Dodger leaves me with scars sometimes. He even bites me if he wants to.„ he paused, looking down at her and leaning closer to her ear “I still love him.„

Delilah opened her eyes and looked up at him immediately. His blue eyes were like diamonds, she had forgotten how beautiful they were and everytime she looked her heart would instantly melt like she had never looked before. And everytime she’d find something new, hope, love, kindness, secrets, pain, strength.. something beautiful but not flawless... honesty.

“It’s not the same Chris.„

“Why don’t you let me worry about that? Hm?„

Delilah laid her head back on his chest and Chris started playing with her hair, brushing it with his fingers gently. It felt like he had done it a million times before, like her hair was a labyrinth that he had walked and knew like the palm of his hand. “Do you need anything?„ he asked

“No..„ she paused, thinking, there were a thousand things she needed right now but she didn’t wanna let go of this.

“I have an idea... you can go have a shower, I’ll wait outside with Laura and then I’ll take you out so you can eat something.„

“Shower sounds good but I don’t wanna go out.. and you don’t have to do that..„

“Going out will help.„

“I’m not sure about that.„

“Hm. How about this? You’ll shower and then we’ll talk about going out.„

That proposal sounded fair. Delilah nodded.

“You want me to tell Laura to come and help you?„

I want you to stay here until I’m healed, until the smell of rain is gone and I can only smell your cologne, until there’s no sign of raindrops on me, until I’m good.

“Can you tell her to bring me towels?„

“Sure thing.„

Delilah moved away from him letting him get up and watched him leave the room, taking the warmth with him, she left a very gentle sigh of disappointment but didnt say anything. She got up and looked herself in the mirror above her little desk in her room. “God I look like a dead girl.„ she mumbled. Her hair were all messy and tangled, her eyes dark, her cheeks pale, her lips swollen. Broken.

“D?„ Laura came in the room holding the towels. She stood behind her friend, looking at her through the mirror. “You ok?„ Delilah turned around, biting her lips.

“Why did you let him in?„

“He wanted to help—„

“He was sorry for me.„

“I’ve told you before, If he didn’t want to be here, he wouldn’t be here.„

“I hate this. He wasn’t supposed to—„

“Maybe this was exactly what was supposed to happen, have you thought of that?„

Delilah didn’t answer. She snatched the towels from her friend and went in her bathroom. Laura shook her head and went out in the leaving room. Chris and Sebastian were sitting on the couch talking when they suddenly stopped as she walked in.

“Is she ok?„ asked Chris, getting a nod and a smile from Laura. She walked over to them and sat in between them on the couch, leaning towards Sebastian.

“I think her getting out of bed and showering is the biggest win.„ Sebastian left a kiss on his girlfriend’s head, letting her know he was proud of how good of a friend she was. “Thank you for coming Chris.„

“don’t worry about it. I’m only here because I want to, she doesn’t deserve this kind of pain.„

“Most often then not, people that have this kind pain don’t deserve it.„ said Sebastian “they’re too nice, that’s the problem.„

“I wish there was a way to fix it.„ groaned Laura “I hate seeing her like this, going to work and knowing she’s alone, fighting alone.„

“She’s not alone, she has you.„ Sebastian reminded her, giving her credit for her friend’s survival.

“I can only do so much.. the worst battle, she’s going through it alone.„ Laura looked at Chris and streched her hand to his leg, squeezing it a little so he’d look at her “at least now she has you too... right?„

Chris hesitated and looked down at his hands. His eyes were full of worry. “I wanna help. I do but... maybe she’s right maybe this isn’t the best idea.„

“Are you fucking kidding me Evans?„ Sebastian looked at his friend with anger.

“Sebastian I’ll be away all the time, she needs someone who will be there, maybe being with her will hurt her more than the opposite. What if I miss her call again? What if I can’t come home to her in time? What if I break her? I... I wanna help but I’m worried I’ll do the exact opposite.„

Laura laughed, shaking her head. The two men looked at her confused. “What are you laughing for?„

“I already told you when you came here earlier. You two belong together, You always think, you never act.„

“I’m just trying to be cautious.„

“If you call idiotic, cautious. Sure.„ shrugged Sebastian.

Chris would answer but right then Delilah walked in. Her hair were wet and a little messy, she was dressed in her old comfortable shorts and an old shirt with Mickey on it but she was clean of all the raindrops. Her cheeks were red again, her eyes open and Chris could swear he could see a rainbow in them. Her lips looked healthier, her expression was calmer. Laura was the first to get up, asking her if she needed anything and then went to make her a cup of tea. She didn’t really know why she came out of the room, she just followed the warmth and found herself sitting on the couch across from Chris, the leaving room table separating them.

“Do you—„

“Don’t do that!„ she said quickly, cutting him off “don’t ask.„ she didn’t wanna y’all about it and she didn’t wxnt Chris or anyone else treating her like she was sick. The storm was over and the only thing she needed was walk away from where it started, forget it. Like it never happened.

“So!„ Sebastian exclaimed “you wanna go out tonight? Eat sushi maybe? Drink some beer?„

“Uuuh sushi sounds good.„ said Laura coming in with Delilah’s tea and giving it to her. Delilah mouthed a simple thank you to her. “What do you think D?„

“I think I’ll stay in, but you can all go—„

“Sushi is literally one of your favorites and you’ll stay in?„

“You have to come!„ persisted Sebastian.

Delilah looked at Chris like he had the answers. She didn’t know what she was looking for but what she found was hope. He gave her a reassuring look, a look that made her feel strong enough to go out there. What he was saying basically was that I’ll catch you if you fall. Maybe she should have thought of it more but the word slipped out her mouth with complete certainty “ok.„ she smiled “I’ll come„

He’ll catch me if I fall.

Taglist;

@annoyinglydarktriumph-us @purely-myself-03 @yelyahcardella @thejemersoninferno @tfandtws @torntaltos

[lokisgame]

Side Effects Of A Heat Stroke [3/3]

Part I  Part II

The light outside changed from glaring white to soft peach. Clouds that gathered all day rose high, wind tugging at curtains in wide open windows. It was almost 5pm and Maggie decided it was time to call it a day.

“Food was wonderful, Dana.” She said again by the door, hugging her daughter and kissing her cheek before reaching for Mulder to close the two step distance between them.

“Fox, I hope to see you like this more often.”

“Mom!” Scully exclaimed as if she said something inappropriate.

“Me too,” Mulder chuckled and they let go, his arm going straight to the small of Scully's back, "as often as I’m invited, of course.” He added looking down, meeting her gaze and smile. 

“As if you ever needed an invitation,” she teased, arm around his waist in return.

Maggie watched them banter the whole afternoon and realized that, even when they weren’t actively saving each other’s lives, they worked quite well together. They had the pull-give routine mastered better than most married couples. Dana’s stubbornness pillowed by his easy manner, his crazy ideas grounded by her reason and patience. They met somewhere in the middle, in almost perfect balance, completely taking it for granted.

"I should get going," she said bringing them back "take care of yourselves and each other." Mulder could feel Scully roll her eyes, so he took charge for once, "we will."

As he closed the doors after Maggie, Scully went to draw back the curtains. The air felt cooler than expected, backing heat losing it's bite.

"I should get going too," he said halfheartedly and lying completely. Nothing waited for him at home, no one to talk to, no one to hold.

Scully ignored him, "you wanna go for a walk?" Mulder looked at her, puzzled. "It looks like it's nicer outside than it is in here." She explained.

"Sure, why not."

Afternoon sun made the trees and buildings cast long shadows, so they stayed on shaded side of the street, watching the sky, the clouds changing.

Scully thanked God for straps and flowing skirts, the only way to survive summer in the city. The relief of feeling the breeze on bare skin.

Mulder chanced more than an occasional glance at her, palms itching to take her hand. He couldn’t take his eyes of her ever since she changed, her skin, the light dusting of freckles. She carried herself a little differently as well, still alert and present, but slowed down, taking in the day as it unfolded without a solid plan. This was Scully for friends and family, one he wouldn’t mind seeing more often, if she allowed it.

Focused on her, he never noticed the sun hiding behind the clouds, so when she jumped, he jumped with her. Scully touched her shoulder then reached out one hand, palm up.

“Did you feel that?” only then, Mulder noticed the wet polkadots staining the sidewalk. “Think we’re gonna make it back?”

“I don’t know.” He replied and she smiled as if she didn’t mind either way.

The air smelled of rain on concrete, cool raindrops on skin, each one like a welcome kiss. Scully kept looking up, marveling at the feeling.

A rumble in the distance, could be thunder, could be a truck. Mulder found her hand.

The rain came harder and they glanced at each other, smiling, ready for anything, walking two more blocks before the sky opened above.

Water splashing under their feet, they ran, hands twined, through empty streets. Her dress soaked through, as was his white shirt. Between the hair falling into her eyes and the pelting rain, Scully barely saw where they were going; for once laughing at the phrase ‘following blindly'.

Pulled to the side, she almost tripped over the three steps he made her climb. A nook hiding the door to some old apartment building, not much but at least it was dry.

Mulder pushed her up, away from the rain, shielding her with his body as much as he could, helping to brush away wet strands from her face.

“Just our luck,” he wiped his face on the wet sleeve.

Scully gently traced her fingertips over his brow, musing out loud, “not a trace.”

“Trace of what?” He asked, charmed by her unexpected tenderness.

“Sunburn,” she explained, playfully booping the tip of his nose.

Hands in pockets, Mulder chuckled, wanting a little too much to hold her. “It's always been like this, I heal fast.”

“Not me,” she leaned against the wall, seeming content to look down at him for once, "I'd be red as a lobster for a week."

“Really?” He mirrored her stance looking up, and saw her shiver. “Are you cold?”

“It’s the rain, it’s nothing.” Taking one step up, again eye level with her, he freed one hand, reached for her. “Really Mulder, I’m fine.”

The words pushed him back, hand falling with his eyes, it was too good to last. Cold rain hit him as he took a step down.

“Hey, come here,” gently tugging on his shirt she pulled him back, one step up and out of the rain. “I don’t want you to catch cold.”

Her arms around his neck made him bold. “Then you’ll have to keep me warm.” He risked putting his hands on her hips, then around her waist. She drew him closer, lips parted, their eyes locked on each other. They never noticed the flash of lightning, so she jumped when thunder crashed above them.

“I've got you,” Mulder whispered and closed the distance. Lips meeting messily, fist tastes of softness, open and waiting. Scully kissed him back, eagerly melting into his arms, catching his lower lip and once he felt the tip of her tongue, he was gone.

He pushed her against the wall, her arms tight around him, fingers in his hair, body pressed into his, each line and curve trembling. She slowed down, roller her hips against his. Mulder gasped, breaking the kiss suddenly. “Slow down!”

She looked at him, picture of innocence, and done it again. “Wicked creature," he teased and their lips met again, slower this time, exploring, learning, hands risking tentative roaming. Palm on her ass made them both shiver, she felt him grow hard.

"Who's wicked now?" She drew back, looking at him with new yet familiar eyes. The goofy grin reaching his eyes, swollen lips, ready to steal her breath again, any moment now.

"Why now?" he asked, quiet wonder in his tone.

"I don't know." She rested her forehead against his, the storm was slowing to a steady hum of rain against sidewalk. "Because we're not being chased or fired. Because we're not dying, because it's summer and your shirt hangs in my closet."

"Because I love you?" He asked, pouring all the need and promise into the easiest and hardest three words he'd ever spoken.

"Yeah," she kissed him, soft and slow, "because I love you."

[talesofawaywardsoul]

Rooted

Time for another writing prompt provided by a friend. I kind of went slightly off with this one. I think it really would do better as a longer story but I’m trying to practice writing short story and get my point across in fewer words. Hopefully you enjoy!

Writing Prompt: “When he said he had roots, I just assumed he was speaking metaphorically.” 

I leaned back in my office chair and stretched my arms above my head, the bones in my elbows cracking. The sound was a constant reminder that I needed to start getting up more often to stretch during work. I stared up at the ceiling and nearly fell backwards out of the chair. 

A spider hung from the ceiling inches from my face. I slowly slid out of the chair, until I was all the way on the floor. I then crawled to the door and ran to my room where I kept a can of bug spray. I grabbed it and snuck back to the office, peering around the corner. I squinted my eyes looking for the small speck.

“Where did you go, you little fucker?” 

I inched closer searching the ceiling and the air between it and the chair. It had to be there, somewhere. 

“Oh shit.” I nearly tripped backwards when I finally found it swinging straight for me. In what seemed like slow motion but was more like two seconds I brought the can up and wasted nearly half of it trying to kill the damn spider. 

“Guess I’ll be adding bug spray to the grocery list.”

Once I was sure it was dead and had cleaned up the chair, wall and desk of bug spray I headed downstairs and threw some chicken nuggets in the microwave for dinner, no longer feeling up to cooking anything. Once they were done I plopped onto my couch and turned the TV on and pulled out my phone. 

Only two minutes into mindless scrolling and a friends post caught my attention. A meme listing the top five reasons they keep a boyfriend around. One of the five things was to kill spiders.

“Who needs a boyfriend for that, I managed just fine on my own.”

I closed Facebook, annoyed with most of what I was seeing. Mid summer really brought out the crazies. I flipped through the pages on my phone looking for a different app to open and landed on the last page where I kept the apps I barely used. And there at the bottom, completely forgotten was Tinder. 

I stared at it for a long time. Its little white flame and pink border taunting me. I hadn’t been on in weeks. The conversations were always so pointless, shallow, one minded or just boring. I found myself opening it anyway and began mindlessly swiping left on shirtless pics and bikini shots.

It was like I had never stopped. It was so easy, constantly swiping left. Occasionally I would pull up someone's profile when a pic showed something of interest. Usually a geeky t-shirt, brightly colored hair or the scenery would make me pause and read their bio. But even then I rarely swiped right. I really didn’t like Tinder at all, it was just the easiest app to use. Not over complicated or time consuming and honestly sometimes an ego boost. But overall I hate trying to connect with someone online but I’m too antisocial to get out. The woes of being me.

My thumb suddenly paused, almost as if it had a mind of its own. It hovered over a picture of grass. It was zoomed in, showing the fine hairs of the grass blades. Dew drops hung on each blade, the sky mirrored on their surface. I touched the picture and began flipping through the rest. They were all scenic nature pictures. 

“Must be a photographer.” 

I rarely swipe right if there isn’t a picture of the person, partially because even I have a shallow bone in my body but also because those usually turn out to be fake profiles. They also only had a letter for their name, M. But still there was something different about them, the pictures were so peaceful and welcoming. Their bio was simple. 

Looking to find a connection. Someone who paints with all the colors of the wind. I’m a solitary person who likes to be in nature. My roots go deep and I have never left the solace of my sanctuary but I want to share the knowledge I have gained over the years with someone worthy. 

I’m not much of a nature person. I think my brutal slaying by bug spray drowning of the aforementioned spider probably clued you in. I think nature is beautiful and breathtaking but I don’t do bugs or dirt. But I found myself liking their profile anyway. The combination of the bio which stated just enough of who they were and the gorgeous pictures convinced me. 

My favorite was the picture of an Ash tree. It stood in the middle of a field, a forest set far back behind it and a small tire swing hanging from one of its mighty branches. It looked so lonely but inviting. As if to say even in its sadness it wanted to welcome others. I swiped right.

Barely a minute later a notification popped up on my phone. I had a new message. 

I love your picture in the sunflowers. Sunflowers are a sign of good luck. 

Yeah, they make me smile. Even when I’m sad. 

There are many legends about sunflowers, the Greek myth is a great story.

Yes, I love Greek mythology. Always wanted to read mythology from other cultures though. I feel like Greek mythology is the most widely known while others you don’t see as often. I’ve often wanted to read more on Native American folklore and mythology.

Really, I would highly recommend it. I could give you some book recommendations.

I would love that.

We talked well into the night. I never thought it was possible to connect to someone and carry on a conversation through a phone like we were doing and so quickly. They were full of so much knowledge, something I hadn’t seen in someone in a long time. Everything they said was carefully thought out and obviously researched. Who had so much time on their hands? Weeks went by and I found myself picking up my phone in mere seconds every time I got a notification hoping it was from them.

Honestly, I’m not a huge fan of most bugs either. There are many that can be damaging to trees. However dirt has never been a problem for me.

Well it’s not that I hate dirt, I just don’t like being dirty without having a way to clean up and if you’re out in nature for an extended period of time, kind of hard to clean up.

True. That is why I welcome a rain storm.

Yes I love the rain, even the heaviest of rain seems peaceful to me. 

Yes and it brings life and nourishment to many. 

Did that big storm reach you? One of the houses on my street had a tree get blown over.

Thankfully no downed branches, I don’t think I could take another beating like the last storm we had. It’s hard on the joints. Just rain for me.

I like big thunderstorms but I can understand it’s not for everyone. Hey so I’m curious, what’s your like, feelings on meeting people on here. 

Well I’d have to say I enjoy it, that’s why I’m on here. Although I must admit your company is really the only one that I have enjoyed. 

I blushed.

I’ve really been enjoying talking to you as well. What I was trying to say though was how do you feel about meeting in person. 

Oh, well I don’t really, I mean to say I can’t. 

I noticed on your profile that you live in a pretty secluded area. Although you’re not too far from the city I live in. Is it a transportation issue?

No I can’t leave my home, my roots are here. 

I get it. I always say I’m gonna travel the world but honestly I’m too afraid to leave my home state. 

I want to travel. I just can’t. 

Why not? I know we haven’t been talking long but we could pick somewhere public if that makes you feel more comfortable. 

I waited for a response but none came. I went through the rest of my day jumping every time my phone dinged. I didn’t know why I was so on edge. We had only been talking for a few weeks. We didn’t really know each other. I didn’t even know what they looked like. So what if they chose to ignore me after a simple question. 

Maybe I asked to soon. I had actually never gotten this far with someone. Any conversation I’d had so far lasted a day, two tops. When did people normally try to meet. I had a few guys try to push meeting up when we’d only been talking for like 15 minutes but I doubted that was normal. 

Five days went by and I hadn’t heard anything. I tried to forget about it. Poured myself into work, and even started exercising to keep my mind off it. I tried going back on Tinder to find someone new to talk to but after the first conversation ended with a rather rude and insensitive remark because I didn’t catch his hints, I decided it was time to delete the app. I started searching through the settings looking for the option to delete when I saw a notification pop up. 

“If it's that asshole, I swear I’m throwing my phone out the window.”

I pulled up my messages and was surprised to see a new message from M. I paused unsure whether to click on it. Did I want to go down that road again? What if they were just upset and messaging me to tell me why. 

“Get over yourself, It’s nothing, just open it.”

I did. 

Today at 5pm. The Ash tree.

A second message was an address to a farm outside of the city. I leaned back in my chair. That wasn’t what I had been expecting at all. A meet up, it’s what I had wanted but it was out of the blue and so cryptic. 

“You’re not really considering this.” I looked back down at my phone. “No of course not.”

I set it screen down. I went into the kitchen and pulled out a pint of ice cream. I grabbed a spoon and began walking aimlessly back and forth eating. I passed my phone, two, three, four times. I paused the spoon hanging from my mouth as I stared at my phone. Finally I put the ice cream down and grabbed my phone. 

I’ll be there. 

I threw my phone on my couch as soon as I sent the response. I immediately regretted it. Why had I agreed to meet this person? I didn’t know who they were or really anything about them. This was dangerous, I can’t go through with it. I grabbed my phone ready to cancel when another thought crossed my mind. I went into my contacts and selected my sister. 

“Hey I need a favor.”

My sister’s car pulled up the long driveway to the old farmhouse. No one had lived in the house for a year. The owner of the property used to rent it out but after the last tenant moved out he hadn’t found anyone new. 

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yes, the Ash tree is right around back and I’ll keep my phone in my hand the whole time. If I don’t text you in five minutes come find me.”

“You sure you don’t want me to walk back there with you.”

“Yes, I have mace. Don’t worry.” I stepped out of the car. My phone clutched in one hand, my other hand in my pocket wrapped around my mace. 

Once I was in view of the ash tree, my face fell. I didn’t see anyone. I drew closer, gripping the mace in my pocket harder. 

“Why did I come out here. This was stupid.” I turned to leave when I heard my phone ding. I took a look and saw a message on Tinder.

Thank you for coming.

Where are you? Is this some sort of joke?

I’m here. Right in front of you.

“Right in front of me, all I see is a tree.”

I don’t have time for this. I don’t know how you get off playing games like this on someone but... 

Before I could finish typing my eye caught something. I got closer to the tree and placed my hand on a carving in it’s trunk.

“Meliae.” I looked at the tree again, remembering what it was, an ash tree. 

“You’re a wood nymph.”

[muzeez]

Sunday

10th May 2020

Sunday

21:22

Today has been cloudy and windy and guess what?? There's been no sign of Henrietta, Merlin, Persia or Folie. They've kept their behinds indoors all day long. It's not rained and it's not been cold but it's not been good enough for them.

So, a cloudy sky and a slight wind can keep them indoors but the thought of a killer disease that they could inadvertently kill others with can't keep them indoors. Which just proves my point. Most people will only play by their own rules, no matter how dangerous the consequences are to others. Yet, they'll be the very ones what bang on the most about how much they care about the NHS and moan about how lockdown is affecting them so badly. When the sun's been out they've not even tried to stay inside. They've just been doing what they've always done on a sunny day and today they've done what they've always done on a non-sunny day.

I've still had to have my white noise playing all day though because Henrietta has been "facetiming" and talking loudly and obnoxiously. At about 5pm ish,I turned my white noise off because I needed to phone Rasbach about something.

As soon as I turned it off, the first thing I noticed was that Henrietta was totally silent.??! Makes me wonder if she can hear my white noise and because she knows her voice isn't reaching me she gives up. Bitch!! Another thing I've noticed is that when I play my white noise, the window and door banging seems to begin. Henrietta with her windows (it can be like 6 or 7 window shutting slams all consecutive and aggressive. She's only got three windows.) Then there's Persia and Folie with the slamming of the doors. Then there's Merlin with his feet and thuds, like he's dropping a bowling ball on the floor.

It might sound like paranoia on my part when I say this but I believe they're all secretly messaging eachother in spite of and against me.

Maybe I am a little bit paranoid but I'm certainly not stupid. Not entirely anyway. 😂

At seven o'clock I turned it onto BBC1 because Boris Johnson was doing a speech about taking steps to lift the lockdown. Suddenly, Henrietta started talking loud!!

'Bitch!' I thought to myself. Shows you how little of a f**k she gives about what's going on. Her facetiming is more important than the information we're about to receive on coming out of lockdown. Also, I found it odd that she would start smack on seven o'clock.

I turned the tele up so her high pitch, irritating, aggressive, nasal voice wasn't cutting into Boris's words but I could still hear her. I sighed in exasperation and jumped to my feet (without making a thud on the floor... it's possible) and went to my little stereo to put my white noise on. It's only that that seems to drowned her out. Cue the banging and the slamming. The white noise doesn't drown that out.

If I ever confront them. I say 'them' because they're in a click and I know that if I'm confronting one they'll all be jumping in. If I confront them about things, they'll probably turn around and be like, 'oh what about you, the other day, slamming your door and screaming and what about when you play your music and what about that white noise and what about when you're talking.

Door slamming and screaming abuse. There's a big difference between one off episodes of out of control rage and malicious, continuous deliberate banging and slamming and talking loud on a daily basis.

Playing my music and singing. I play my music at a reasonable time during the day at a volume that I'm entitled to play it at that time of day. I've never played my music late at night, which funnily enough Henrietta has, when she's had karaoke parties and Merlin has on a couple of occasions on a Saturday and Friday nights through to daylight. Which, I don't mind, music is a good thing but don't dare have a go at me for playing mine loud during the day.

White Noise. Henrietta, you talk extremely loudly and not just on one off occasions. Ev-er-y single day for 10 whole years. Somedays, I've known you to start your "facetiming" at 8am in the morning and you'll carry on all through the day, through to the evening and you've even carried on till after 12 midnight, shouting and laughing and making childish yobbish jeering noises like you're in the middle of a bustling nightclub. Over the years it's contributed to me drinking, developing ear infections because of using blu-tac as earplugs. These things have played a massive part in me having massive mood swings at work, to me becoming ill and being, I'll be totally honest, Mentally Unstable, you know, over a long stretch of time. Earlier this year, I discovered that white noise is the only thing that has drowned you out and stopped me having to have my tv on so loud. After 10 years of suffering with your shouting Henrietta and your constant heavy footed pacing the floor, you are not going to make out my white noise, which is a neutral noise by the way, is bothering you.

As for me talking. Again, there's a big difference between one off conversations I have on my phone, one off rants that I'll admit I've had, due to the exasperation you guys have put me through and constant agitated shouting, childish jeering, heavy footed pacing, loud SEX, (yes I heard that). Things which are constant and relentless and I feel alot of the time malicious and deliberately inconsiderate. There's a massive difference between my noise and your noise. Mainly because it's your noise that has triggered the majority of my noise and I'm NOT doing mine out of malice.

Also, don't get me started with drunken returns from the pub with Jack the drunk. Screaming abuse effing and blinding, dropping trails of kebab meat allover the foyer, crashing into the walls. Those haven't been one offs either, they've been every single night. Late.

Then there's Persia. Folie's not always been on the scene but having Persia next door has had more than it's fair shares of trouble. Different boyfriend every month, thugs trying to kick her door in then making gun gestures towards MY window shouting 'WATCH! WATCH!" Blatant drug purchases right outside the building.

All that what I've had to put up with from you guys and then you all wanna get into a little exclusive click with eachother, clapping for the NHS but then creating your own rules when it comes to lockdown , so-called "social distance" gatherings right outside my window and outside the main entrance of the building where other people have to pass you all, attracting other individuals from other buildings to approach, chatting, faces uncovered, 2 metre rules gradually turning into 1 metre, drinking alcohol. You welcome Asbo George with open arms who lives God knows where and who once threatened to smash my face in and put my windows through and doesn't even fucking LIVE HERE.

You're all laughing and joking and being boisterous, then I stop by for 5 seconds on my way to get essentials and you're putting on an amicable act but I'm picking up on all the little mannerisms and body language and you allowed that Bastard Asbo George to start having a go at me about stuff at work, which he's totally wrong on and slagging off my friend Rasbach then waving sarcastically at me when I go inside.

All these subtle shady behaviours all because what? Because you've maybe heard some raw hometruths about yourselves in my one off meltdowns. Which you can't prove I was talking about any of you anyway because I don't mention people's real names when I'm ranting or talking on the phone when it comes to complaints. So, if you think you've heard your name you've MISheard but that's what happens when you evesdrop, you can get the wrong end of the stick (apart from when I hear someone telling someone else that I work at ******* and mimicking a banging noise just after I had banged on the floor.) And even IF I had used your proper names, so fucking what? I'm saying nothing that isn't true and what I've suffered, at your hands, this last ten years totally outweighs any anything you can say against me. I'm not saying I'm perfect but I'm pretty damn fucking close. Because I think, I'm a thinker, I take people to heart, I learn people's names, I'm aware of people and who they are as people. I don't have a desire to mess with people's heads, I don't set out to manipulate people or make friends with a person just for the sake of alienating another. I set out to treat everyone with respect and like human beings because I am one.

So, maybe it's about time you as my neighbours started taking a leaf out of my book and stop acting territorial over a building that we are ALL tenants in. You don't own the outside of this building, just you four. There's other people that live here including me and you need to stop being clicky with eachother, so you think you've got the power to behave as you want, sit where you want and ostracize people just because you don't like the look of their face. Everybody here is a tennant and everybody is a human being with equal rights and if I'm forced to confront any of you again about your unreasonable, inconsiderate persecutory behaviour, towards me or any of the other tennants and you try again to argue with me and throw things back at me, I will report you without any hesitation and I won't be as polite as I'm being now.

Maybe you can start behaving right now by getting your arses indoors and abiding PROPERLY to these lockdown regulations.

Don't make me suggest it twice. 😁😁😁😁😁

Oh and Henrietta, if Asbo George turns up, you ignore the door because he's nothing but a user and a bully. I know you've been letting him in your flat and I also know that deep down you are worried about your health and Coronavirus but you feel you can't say no to him and to looking after his dog. If he starts being persistent you call the police. Don't let him push you around. He's an arsehole and if the police are useless or he starts turning nasty and I have to come downstairs and run his ugly arse out the building, I will. Because right now, I'm in the fucking mood cos if he thinks he can be threatening and intimidating, I'll show him threatening and intimidating. In fact, I'll make it so he daren't even show his claaart passed his own front door.

[peterkayscarshare]

Yesterday, Today & Tomorrow  By OverTheRainbow Chpt 5

Chapter 5: One Month Later....

She'd spent every weekend for the past four weeks travelling back and forth to Preston. Mandy had gone house hunting with her. Originally it had been flat hunting with the intention of one bedroom and possibly a balcony, or at least enough space for a window box but Mandy insisted she get two bedrooms to allow for regular visits and so when they widened their search and found a little terraced house in a quiet part of town with a small garden, the deal was done. The landlord was happy for her to modernise the decor, provided it stayed fairly "neutral" and having been introduced to Misty, he had no objections to Kayleigh's canine housemate. She would be earning more in her new job and with the prospect of bonuses for hitting her targets; the little house was well within her budget. She had annual leave still left to take, so she would finish up on the Wednesday and start moving in the day after. She'd bought a new bed and sofa that were due on Thursday. BT and Sky were due on the Friday. All being well, she'd have her bits and pieces in place before she started her new job on Monday. All that was left was to say goodbye. The process had already begun. Customers and reps that she'd come to know and chat to over the years, who knew she was leaving, stopped by to wish her well. Her leaving do was on Friday. It would coincide with the departure of Ted 2, or Ethan, as Kayleigh now knew him. He'd made a point of saying hello when he realised they'd both be leaving at the same time. She'd initially been flustered like a schoolgirl when he spoke to her but she soon realised the inherent stupidity of her embarrassment. Ethan was great kid but he was just that, a kid. A "Manbo" as Elsie might say. In fairness he had beautiful manners and displayed more emotional maturity than some she could mention, who had a good couple of decades on him. Still, the least said about that the better.

She'd been stunned when John announced her name for the Christmas Team. She'd just assumed she'd be replaced, after Cath Hilton told him she would be leaving soon. Instead, he'd insisted she should be a part of it. In some ways it had been cathartic. They'd been forced to be in each other's company on a regular basis over the past few weeks and slowly but surely Kayleigh was finding herself becoming more comfortable around him. The happy intimacy they'd once shared had been replaced with something else. She wasn't sure how to define it exactly, but they were talking....at least to the extent that it allowed them to function and that was the main thing. She couldn't simply turn off her feelings. God knows she wished she could. She'd concluded that it really wasn't his "fault" that he didn't love her. It wasn't exactly something you could force. She couldn't will him into it. In some ways it might even be a blessing. There could be nothing worse than being with someone who was there only through a sense of obligation. She didn't want to be another Charlotte. She'd occasionally catch him staring at her when she wasn't looking and her ideas always seemed to attract additional attention from him but she just assumed that it was simply his way of showing he wanted to make amends. She was growing tired of being sad, hurt and angry. She couldn't keep on analysing his every action. Tormenting herself with a past she couldn't change and a future that would never be. She was physically moving on. Maybe it was time she began the emotional stage of the process.

After much debate, the team had come up with a "theme" for Christmas. "Peace & Goodwill to All". It seemed appropriate given the year that had been. It would have traditional and modern elements. An indoor mini Christmas Market that would celebrate the best of British, with a nod to cultural diversity. Kayleigh had loved the idea and pointed out that it would be a great way to up sell products, by demonstrating how traditional ingredients could be given a modern twist. John had nodded enthusiastically and noted it was a "Great point that, Kayleigh." It earned him a slightly pained smile but he seemed happy to take what he could get. The part of her that still loved him couldn't help but want him to succeed. She knew there was a promotion in it for him if he did. She found that despite her very best efforts, she couldn't bring herself to begrudge him that. Maybe it would make him happy. Or at least provide one of those fleeting moments of happiness that he was content to "settle" for.

They'd gone for a traditional Twelve Days of Christmas lighting display. "I'd be chuffed if my "true love" gave me five gold rings…to be fair, I'd settle for the Lords a' leapin...but if he turned up on my doorstep with a bloody partridge in a pear tree, I'd shove it up his arse!" Elsie cackled long and loud. "There wouldn't be a second day of Christmas, I can tell ya! Bloody bird shit everywhere!" It made Kayleigh chuckle too. John simply squeezed his eyes shut tight in disgust and shook his head. "Sure I'm only havin a laugh. What would we do without laughter eh Kayleigh love!? Hey, Mr Redmond! What are you gettin your "true love"?" Elsie regretted the words almost as soon as they left her mouth. She wasn't usually one for regrets but she did like Kayleigh and she had a soft spot for John. She wouldn't seek to deliberately hurt either of them. It didn't exactly take a sensitivity she didn't possess, to know that something had gone very badly wrong between these two. As an agonisingly awkward silence ensued, Elsie did what only she could do...she filled it. "Sure don't be tellin us. I don't want my surprise ruined...I know you're lookin forward to fillin my stockin…aren't ya!?" "It'll be a bloody P45 with a big red bow on it if you don't get back to work". Elsie lent conspiratorially towards Kayleigh, "So sensitive that one...but he loves me really." With a final hearty laugh she was gone. Leaving John and Kayleigh standing there, trying to avoid eye contact. Finally, as John moved to leave, Kayleigh suddenly said, "John." He turned around so fast he almost gave himself whiplash, with an eager expression, bordering on desperation, he said, "Yeah". "I wanted to give you this." He looked down at an oil stained brown padded envelope. "What's this?" "It's the 140 quid I owe you." "I wasn't expecting to get it in used notes in a brown envelope. You gonna give me my instructions and a code word next." He smiled. Kayleigh didn't find it funny. Steve and Mandy had insisted on scrapping together most of the money from their "holiday jar". Mandy felt bad about inadvertently locking her sister in and Steve felt bad about the whole phone situation, or rather, had been made to feel bad about it, by Mandy. Despite Kayleigh's pleas that it wasn't a big deal and that she would pay, they'd accept no argument. Hence the cash in hand and the oil stained envelope which Steve had forced on her as she'd left for work that morning. "I'm sorry it's not a BACS transfer. Maybe you'd have liked it deposited in your Swiss Bank Account." Oh Christ, he'd done it again. "No! I was just jokin...I, I didn't mean..." "Yeah. I'd forgotten that words aren't really your thing, are they?" With that she stormed off.

How the Hell did that happen?! He couldn't even open his bloody mouth! Aw stick this! He'd had it. He was sick of it. They're all the friggin same! The sooner she was gone the better. He got in his car at 5pm, put on his seatbelt and didn't look back. He brooded to the point of simmering fury. He hated the world and everything in it. He sat at the traffic lights and looked at the other poor sods around him, all stuck in their metal cages. Living their mundane lives....It had been raining today but the early evening sun was making an effort and suddenly, there it was, he could see it in the distance...a perfect rainbow. Radio 5 Live was analysing Prime Ministers Questions but John was miles away in another time and another place......"I have always fancied someone reading out the lyrics to S Club 7 "Reach"". "That's a bit chipper for a funeral innit?!" "Well they won't be singing it. Just reading the words out....When the world leaves you feeling blue, you can count on me, I will be there for you." "How? You're dead." "I'll be speaking to everyone from Heaven....When it seems all your hopes and dreams are a million miles away, I will reassure you." "What you on about?" "Reach for the stars, climb every mountain higher, reach for the stars, follow your heart’s desire, reach for the stars and when that rainbow's shining over you...that's when all your dreams will come true...and I'm the rainbow...so whenever anyone sees a rainbow they'll be thinkin of me." God...if only he could stop. He heard a car horn sounding somewhere behind him and realised he was still stopped, on a green light. He was shaken out of his revere, waved an apology, hit the accelerator and kept driving. He wanted to be angry, to hate her, to see her as "just another woman". To write her off as another neurotic. To say goodbye and good riddance...but he couldn't. He loved her. He'd fallen for her from the day she threw her piss in his face and he'd kept on falling. It didn't matter how hard the landing had been, he still loved her and he always would. When he got home the contents of the parcel he'd been so anxious to receive all those weeks ago, sat on his mantelpiece. He couldn't return it and yet keeping it was impossible. It merely added to his misery. There was nothing else for it. It was time to deal with it, once and for all.

The remainder of the week had crawled by at a snail’s pace but was largely without incident. For Kayleigh her days were filled with goodbyes and good wishes, her evenings with packing and planning and her nights with sadness, regret and dreams of what might have been. For John, his days were an endless slog of trying at all costs to focus on his work, his evenings, of thinking about how he'd keep focused tomorrow and his nights, with trying to focus on anything other than Kayleigh Kitson. Friday eventually arrived. It was her leaving do and Kayleigh was miserable. It was also Ethan's...and he was anything but. Jenna had come down from Scotland and he was a delighted and attentive boyfriend. Together they looked like they'd stepped off the cover of a magazine. Kayleigh mused that they were two people unlikely to ever grace the pages of HeartSearchers.com. They didn't need to search for love. Love found them. Love always found people like them. It couldn't find her if she wore a high vis jacket and stood under a flashing neon sign. John hadn't shown up. As she stood amongst the crowd in the Poachers Arms, holding her glass of Prosecco with a fake smile on her face, she'd never felt more alone. She heard Jenna's soft lilting Scottish accent next to her, "Excuse me. Kayleigh?" "Yes." "I'm Jenna, Ethan's girlfriend." "It's lovely to meet you Jenna." "Likewise. I hear you're leaving too". "Yep. Off to Preston." "Is your partner going too?" "I'm sorry, my what?" "Eh...your partner? Ethan mentioned that he worked here too...John isn't it?" "I'm sorry you must have..." "It's just that I wanted to say thank you. I'm just sorry he isn't here to say it in person." Kayleigh's curiosity was peaked, "Thank you for what?" "Didn't he tell you? Modesty. That speaks volumes about the man. You probably know that Rob, Ethan's Dad and Barbara's husband, hasn't been well lately. It's been a nightmare for them. It turns out that Rob will need further tests in London but the cost of travelling down there and overnight accommodation was going to be so difficult to manage. Rob's self-employed and without his wage and trying to make ends meet on Barbara's salary, it's just been so hard. Ethan does what he can but he's in Edinburgh during term time and his brother's still at school. It's been such a struggle. To cut a long story short, John put in a request for financial assistance to the company's benevolent scheme. We just heard that Barbara will get a grant to help with travel and accommodation costs. John also gave Ethan a bonus for his "Outstanding Customer Care". It's a couple of hundred quid. He's over the moon!" Kayleigh was stunned. "Anyway, I just wanted to ask if you would pass on our thanks.....by the way, Ethan says you're such a lovely couple." With that, Jenna wandered off, to rescue Ethan from a throng of female admirers which included Joyce Chung and Diane off Non Foods and leaving Kayleigh to pick her jaw up off the floor.

The area Manager Alan Campbell presented her with a bouquet of flowers and a cheque for £350. He called her Kylie twice, to barely suppressed laughter. She wanted nothing more than for this night to end. As the music got slower and the crowd got ever more drunk, she ordered a taxi, said her goodnights and left. She'd see them on Monday for her final three days. As she headed off into the night she couldn't help but feel hurt that he couldn't even be bothered to show up. He hadn't even tried to say goodbye. No one knew why he didn't show. Many suspected. Cath Hilton told her he was on a residential course next week. That was it then. She wouldn't see him again. It really was over. It was two days later that she decided to put pen to paper and write him a letter. There were a few things she needed to say and some things he needed to hear.

Dear John,

I'm not really one for letters as a rule. I may be a woman of many words but few of them are ever on a page. I know that probably surprises you, in absolutely no way! Joking aside, I suppose I just felt that there were some things I needed to say and in your absence, I had no one to say them to. I want you to know that I don't hate you. Genuinely, I don't. You were right. I always assume. That's my problem, well one of them at least. I let myself believe that you felt for me, the way I felt for you. It's not your fault that you didn't and that you don't. I can't blame you for that, or at least I shouldn't.

I need you to know that our friendship, for the precious time we had it, meant the world to me. You were one of the very best friends I've ever had. I can't remember a happier time in my life than sharing your car every day. Laughing and singing and putting the world to rights. I'm glad you seem to have overcome your aversion to people singing in your face. Maybe I've shown you it can be fun. If so, then my work here is done. I suppose it is anyway. I'll always cherish those times. I want you to know that I wish you everything you wish for yourself. I hope you find contentment, wherever your journey takes you. I hope you keep gigging with Compendium (you've got to be impressed that I got the name right for a change). You should never give up on your dream. Reach for the stars. Sometimes you'll miss but it doesn't mean it wasn't worth the effort. I'm sorry we never got to say goodbye. Please take good care of yourself John Redmond. I'll never forget you.

Your buddy,

Kayleigh xx

She wiped the tears from her eyes as she finished and placed the letter in an envelope. She'd leave it in his pigeonhole at work. He'd get it when he returned on Thursday. By then she'd be in Preston and starting a new life.

He'd worn his snazziest shirt, a pair of dark jeans he liked and a splash of Calvin Klein. It may be completely futile but it was worth the effort. She was worth the effort. He was going to be a grown up. Tonight was her leaving do and he was going to talk to her. Properly. He was going to tell her the truth. All of it...and then he was going to finally deliver the contents of that parcel. He picked it up, turned it around in his hand, grabbed his car keys and his jacket and set off. Tonight was the night. Tonight would change everything, one way or another. He'd been driving for ten minutes when the phone rang. It was Paul. He'd just had a call; Sophie had fallen at Beavers on Ice. It sounded like she'd broken her arm. She wanted her Uncle John. John pulled over to the side of the road and ran his hand across his forehead. He adored the kids. Sophie was his little Princess. The thought of her in pain and wanting to see him was too much to bear. "Where is she?" he asked. "They've taken her to A&E at the Infirmary. Thing is we're at a Rotary Club dinner. We're half way through a four course meal. The bloody Mayor's on our table and you know I mentioned that tender we're working on...." John put his head back and let out a long breath. "I'm on me way". "Thanks John. You're the best. Listen, tell her Mummy and Daddy love her loads and we'll see her soon. Let us know how you get on. Make sure you phone if they discharge her. We don't want to go there if we don't have to. Parking at the Infirmary's a nightmare and Angela has a thing about hospitals since that in-growing toenail thing. I'll call Nana and tell her she'll have to keep Ben for a bit." "Yeah. Fine." "Thanks again John. Try and get there as quick as you can eh." With that he hung up. No, "Did you have plans tonight"? "Am I inconveniencing you"? "Where you planning on telling someone you loved them and wanted to spend the rest of your days with them"? "Aww, sorry about f'in up your life". He looked at it. Sitting there on the passenger seat, taunting him. There was nothing he could do....he was sure she wouldn't take his calls anyway and this was something he needed to do face to face. He headed to A&E. It was nearly midnight before they finally left. Sophie, in her Elsa costume, her little arm in plaster, weary and tearful in her Uncle John's arms as he sang "Let it go" softly to her and she tried to duet. She was more upset about messing up her routine than breaking her arm, it seemed. After he'd got her booster seat out of the boot and strapped on her seat belt, he'd taken the contents of the parcel from the front passenger seat and placed it in the glove compartment. Best not to think about it now. By the time they got back to Paul's she was asleep. He handed her gently to Angela who took her upstairs to bed. Paul thanked him, asked him how things were with him and before he'd had a chance to answer, told him all about the tender and what it would mean for the company and had John ever thought of joining the Rotary? He hadn't. John said he'd call tomorrow to check on Sophie and left. The leaving do would be over now. There was no point trying to go to the Poachers Arms at this point. It was done. Over. He'd never see her again. "If it's meant to be, it'll be". It clearly never was.

She'd left her note in his pigeonhole on Monday. He'd gone to the residential in Leeds. She spent her final two days doing a handover to her replacement, a 22 year old pretty blonde called Kim. Rachel already hated her. She was attracting the attention and approval of many of the staff and customers, admittedly most of them male. She'd have no problem flogging her Dairylee Dunkers. That she was also a lovely, fun young woman would also help. Kayleigh liked her and smiled when Kim said how sad she was that she was leaving, as she thought they would have become good friends. She'd finally left on Wednesday to cards, balloons and tears. Promises were made to "keep in touch" amid pleas not to "be a stranger". She'd finished packing up Mandy's Citroen that evening and headed off to Preston for her first night in her new home, sleeping on an air mattress.

The residential had been a write off. Litchy had spent most of it trying to pick up the hotel receptionist and calling him a "boring bastard" for not playing along. His mind was literally miles away. Counting down the hours until she would be gone. He drove to work on Thursday like a zombie. He collected his mail from his pigeonhole and went to his office. He received an email from Alan Campbell. Head office liked his ideas for Christmas. He wanted to meet him at 2pm. He had some great news. He started to open his mail but was distracted by the arrival of Joyce Chung in a right flap. From what he could gather the words Elsie, Rachel and a right hook sounded ominous. It proved to be just that. They'd had an altercation when Rachel remarked on Elsie "tasting" the new smoked salmon quiche. Rachel was now wearing several quiches and an ice pack over her right eye. Elsie was missing several hair extensions and had scratches on her face that looked like she'd been tackled by a feral cat. There was some debate about who struck who first. Although that Elsie had called Rachel a "Two bit, arse kissing whore", was not in dispute. Both women were sent home pending an investigation. By the time he'd calmed everyone down, written an incident report and re-staffed the deli counter, it was lunch time. He'd also become one of the very few male members of staff to be disappointed by the sight of Kim. He was now on the list with Nick in electricals. Nick had been hoping for another Ethan. John had been hoping for a change of mind that never came. Alan Campbell gave him the news that he was in line for promotion. It would most likely mean a change of store but it was a great opportunity for him. It all felt strangely flat. A promotion in a career he never really wanted and the one person he wanted to celebrate it with was gone. It was almost 5pm by the time he got round to opening his mail. That's when he noticed the handwritten envelope. He opened it, unfolded the letter and read its contents. By the end the tears had rolled off his cheeks and splashed on the paper. He sat for a moment, trying to order his thoughts into some kind of coherent action. Finally, it all came together in his mind and a truce was called in the seemingly never ending war between his heart and his head. He knew what he needed to do and he was damn well going to do it. He dried his eyes, grabbed his car keys and left. He checked the glove compartment of his car and before he knew it, he was en route to Bury and he wasn't going to stop.

Steve was in his usual location, tinkering with his ever uncooperative bike. The sight of the familiar red car pulling up alongside him caused him to do a double take. John was out of the car like a man possessed. Before Steve could ask him what he was doing there, or give him a bollocking for ruining Kayleigh's life....or seek his advice on the compressor...he said, "Where is she Steve?" "I'm not sure she'd want you to know mate". John looked up at the window of the box room. The lamp was gone...he couldn't dwell on that now; he had more important matters on his mind. "I know that…and I understand why you might not want to tell me but listen...I love her Steve. She's every bloody thing in the world to me and I need to see her. I need to tell her that and if she tells me where to go then fair dos. I've tried. I need to try, just once in my soddin life, I need to try...please...help me mate...tell me where she is". Before Steve could reply, Mandy's Citroen pulled up. She jumped out immediately. "Oh, now I don't believe THIS!" Steve tried to calm her down, ""Mandy listen..." "Don't you Mandy me! What the hell is he doing here!?" "I know we've only met in passing and you don't know me but..." "Oh believe me, I know enough sunshine! I know more than enough. I know everything I need to know! You broke my sister's heart. You drove her from her job and from my home and you have the gall to show up here?! You can piss right off....go on, get lost! NOW!" John stood his ground for a few seconds and looked at Steve. "Mandy give us a minute please". "You what!?" "Just go inside. You're making a spectacle for the neighbours" "Stuff the f'in neighbours!" "Go inside Mandy. The kids are home. Don't let them see you shoutin the odds in the street." She considered this for a moment. Looked daggers at John, called him a "Selfish, heartless bastard" then went inside. Steve looked at John who appeared well and truly crushed. After a moment he said, "The Kitson's make tough women.....are you sure you're ready for that?" John looked up and saw the smile growing on Steve's face. "I'm ready", he replied. "Well, if you've the balls to stand there and take Mandy in full flow, I think you've got what it takes." Steve reached into his pocket and took out a small notebook. He reached behind his ear for a pencil. He scribbled down an address and handed it to him. "Good luck mate...you're gonna need it". "Thanks. I won't forget this". As he headed to the car John turned, "Maybe put in a good word for me if you get a chance?" "Listen. You make Kayleigh happy. You won't need me to give you a reference." John smiled, got in the car, set the sat nav for the address in Preston and was off. Steve watched him go with a smile. He momentarily contemplated talking to Mandy, and then said aloud, "Nah. I'll leave it for a bit."

John turned on Forever FM for the first time in weeks as he headed up the motorway to the strains of John Parr's "Man in Motion". He was soon singing along. This wasn't going to be easy but it would be worth it. If nothing else she'd know how he felt. She deserved that. The sat nav took him on a detour as soon as he arrived in Preston. Nothing new there. "I don't think you've got a clue where you're goin love...you and me both eh....this can't be right...I've been down here three times already…you're off your tits...I'm gonna stop and ask someone...bloody piece of shit!" Finally, he arrived. Number 121, Evergreen Road. A little terraced house. He reached into the glove box, took out his precious cargo, held it in his hand for a moment, and then got out of the car. It was two or three steps at most to the front door but it felt like the journey of a lifetime. He rang the doorbell. Beyonce's "Single Ladies" rang out. She must have kept that from the old house he thought. He heard her voice down the hall, "Just a second, I'm on me way!" He loved that voice. When the door opened, she was standing there in a pair of denim dungarees with one strap undone and a long sleeved white t-shirt underneath. She had a paint brush in her hand and the dungarees were splattered in white paint. Some of it was on her cheek. Her hair was tied up haphazardly in a bun with pieces falling out around the side of her face and down her neck. She looked slightly flushed...and she'd never looked more beautiful to him.

For a few seconds she stood there. Her mouth open slightly. Just looking at him. Then she regained her composure. "John!" "Yeah. It's me." "What are you doing here?!" "I was hoping I could talk to you." "Now? You want to talk to me, now? It's not exactly a great time." She looked down at her attire. "You've been painting". "Nah. I was heading out for a date." His face fell. "Really!?...oh I'm sorry...if this is a bad time…" "Don't be daft! I was being sarcastic. What kind of date would I be goin on dressed like this?!" "Paintballing". He smiled. She laughed, despite herself. He always could find a way to make her laugh, like no one else. "Well, I suppose you best come in then. I was about to make a brew. Might as well make two." "Thanks...I thought you'd never ask". "I didn't....So...I'm guessing Steve" "Steve?" "How you got my address" "Yeah. Don't be angry with him." "I'm not. I don't have to be. Our Mandy'll kill him" "Well I'm hoping he won't have died in vain then". Kayleigh went into the kitchen to put the kettle on and lay out the mugs. John looked around the little living room. Small but cute. Like Kayleigh. He liked what she'd done to it already. He looked through to the kitchen; her back was to him, at the sink. There were pretty pink flowers on the windowsill…and then he saw it...the heart lamp…she hadn't thrown it away. She couldn't bring herself to bin it. "I'm hoping the smell of the paint won't kill off me plants. It's already knocking me out and I've got every window open. Then again, maybe that's not such a good idea. The cold probably won't agree with them either. I've always loved flowers but I don't think I'm very green fingered. My Mum is though." This was Kayleigh. She was nervous and desperately trying to fill the silence, so he seized the moment, "I got your letter"....it stopped her cold. "I got your letter Kayleigh" he repeated. She closed her eyes for a moment at the sound of him saying her name once again. She turned to face him and sighed. "I really wanted it to end John. The anger. I wanted it to end. I want it to end. I'm exhausted." "Me too." "I just want us both to move on...ya know?" "What if I don't?" "What?" "What if I don't want to move on? What if I want to go back....Go back to before you left my car. Go back and say what I wanted to say. What I should have said".

Kayleigh reached behind her and grabbed the edge of the sink. She was sure her legs were going to give way. He was on a roll and he wasn't going to stop. "I want you to know that I'm sorry. More than I've ever been in my whole life. I was a coward. The thing is, you terrify me." "I terrify you!?" "Yeah. I'm Kayleigh phobic." "Don't make a joke of this John". "I'm sorry. That's what I do. I avoid things. I play them off. I deflect. Not because they don't matter but because they do. You do. You matter to me more than anything. I was so scared of losing you...and then I did. You've no idea how many times I've replayed that bloody conversation, wishing I hadn't been such a dickhead. Wishing I'd just been honest and said what I meant." "What did you mean?" "I sent a text to Forever FM....but you missed it...Nobody puts Kayleigh in the corner". Her eyes went wide as the significance of those words began to dawn. "Yeah. You got out of the car just before they read it out. They played "Kayleigh"....by Marillion, 1985.... I loved that song....can't listen to it now". "John..." "What I should have said was that I love you Kayleigh Kitson. I did then, I do now and I always will. You make me happier than I ever imagined it was possible to be and being without you, these past few weeks, have been a living hell. I know you've got this new job and this new house and this new life but....do you think you could find a place in it for me?... I can't face being without you. Waking up every day and knowing you're not there." There were tears in both their eyes now. She looked down at his right hand. "What's that?" "It's what was in the parcel me Nana was waiting in for. It was for you...it's for you...it's yours...from me…" Nervously, he passed over to her, a white box. She took it, looked at it and slowly opened it. With a sharp intake of breath, she reached out and touched a simple gold disk on a gold chain. There, etched on the front were the words..."Pure and Simple" in beautiful calligraphy. She looked up at him, "Turn it over" he whispered. On the back it read "I'll be there for you" and beneath it a J and K were entwined with a date below it. "It's the date of our first car share together...do you like it?...if you don't I can..." before he finished speaking she let out a sob, then covered her mouth. "Do you hate it?" She shook her head. "Do you like it?" She nodded. "I love it" she finally managed to say. "I really wanted to hate you, ya know? I did. It would've been so much easier to hate you but I can't and I don't and I never will....I love you John Redmond…God help me but I still do and I will do for the rest of my life." With that she put her necklace down on the kitchen counter, reached over to him, grabbed the lapels of his suit jacket, drew him to her and kissed him. At first he was wide eyed and stunned, then blissful happiness and long simmering passion overwhelmed him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and returned her kiss. Filling it with all the love and desire he felt for her. Without realising it they were soon so caught up in the moment that his suit jacket and tie were on the floor and they were heading backwards into the living room. As Kayleigh began to make light work of his shirt buttons and he fiddled hopelessly with the catch on her dungarees, there was a sudden thud, which prompted their temporary separation, followed by a curse emitting from John's previously happily occupied lips. "Oh John! Look! You've stood in me emulsion!" He looked down to see his right foot and lower trouser leg, coated in white paint. "Aw BUGGER!" She tried to stifle a giggle....then he looked up at her, smiled his very best cheeky smile and waggled his eyebrows..."You'll just have to help me get out of me trousers then...won't you" she laughed and so did he, then she threw her arms around him and they hugged each other tightly before he lifted her up spun her round then carried her across the room.

He pulled a sickie on Friday. If she could play him like a banjo fully clothed, then naked, except for her new necklace, she could play him like a Stradivarius. She jokingly thanked him for helping her test the springs out on her new bed, so enjoyably. He whispered, "I try...and if you give me time to catch me breath, I'll happily try again..." Later, he'd told her about Sophie and her broken arm. She said she couldn't wait to meet her and would get her something to cheer her up. She talked to him about what Jenna had said at her leaving do and told him it made her love him even more and she didn't think that was possible. The springs got another stress test....Eventually they ventured down stairs for something to eat. She made him a brew and a bacon butty, and then they decided to head back to his place to grab a change of clothes and some essentials for the rest of the weekend. They'd laughed, sang along to Forever FM and held hands like a couple of teenagers, on the journey back to Manchester. She admired his house, dashing from room to room before bouncing on his bed and offering to return his earlier favours...."Bloody hell woman you're insatiable", he laughed. "You're addictive", she giggled. He stopped at Big Bobs Munch Box and they had a couple of Fat Boys, before going to see his Nana. Armed with a Dairy Box, Kayleigh was an instant hit. Nana loved Corrie and the two women bonded over the latest gossip. It delighted John. As they left, Nana thanked him for the Dairy Box, which left him speechless, told him she was proud of him and his new promotion and kissed both John and Kayleigh on the cheek before whispering to John, "She's a lovely lass". John whispered back "I know". "What was that?!" Kayleigh called from the pathway. "Never you mind!" he replied and winked at his Nana. They set off back to Preston and spent the rest of the weekend together making up for lost time. He had a long commute to the store on Monday morning but he couldn't care less. It was worth every minute. Leaving her that morning had been agony but he knew he'd see her later and that was bliss. She was getting her new company car and she couldn't wait to show it off to him. They'd called each other at least a dozen times and texted almost as much with several being little more than, 😘💏 and ❤. He was happier than he'd ever been when they sat together that night eating a Spag Bol they'd prepared together. She was telling him about her day and what she'd be doing and her training and he was simply delighting in watching her. He was so proud of her. He loved her so very much. He knew in that simple moment exactly what he wanted. When she finished speaking he said, "Will you promise me something?" "Yeah...what?" "Will you promise me we won't have "Runaway" as our first dance?" A slow smile grew on her lips as she realised what he was saying, "Are you asking me to marry you John Redmond?" "You haven't promised me yet" "You haven't answered me yet". He laughed and so did she. Then he got up from his chair, got down on one knee and took her hand..."Kayleigh Kitson, will you make me an even happier man than I am right now and marry me....subject to an agreement on our first dance...?" "Yes. Yes I will." After they'd kissed he said, "I've not got you a ring yet but we'll do it at the weekend. It'll give you a chance to Google and find something you like...within reason...I may be about to become a Store Manager but I'm really not Lord Sugar." "Oh Sugar shumugger...your mine....and I love ya!" As she ran to grab the phone he asked, "Where are you off to!?" "We're engaged John! I've got to tell me Mum and Dad and Kelly and Kieron and Mandy!" With that she disappeared into the hall...only to pop her head round the door again..."Don't worry...I'm not running away". With that she smiled, winked and disappeared again he could hear her giggling as she went....resistance really was futile...

[tradewithjorgie-blog]

3. I’m not sleeping, I’m resting my eyes...

We often think of success as a linear journey. All I have to do is slough through enough shit and eventually I’ll make it. Not a bad way of looking at things. Very macho man, tough guy, don’t stop no matter what attitude. Maybe not the best. Here’s why

1. Not stopping at all is exhausting. Can you give me an example of a perpetual motion machine of any kind? That’s just not nature’s way.

2. What happens when you inevitably do stop/run out of gas/get distracted?

and my personal favorite

3. What if what you need to move forward on this particular journey, is found on the path to something else? Do you ignore that key item/emotional development/character development and hope that your persistence will be enough to power through? How will that affect your journey if you are able to push through this obstacle poorly prepared?

They’re not easy questions because life isn’t linear. At least I don’t think it is. Sure you get older every day, and when people ask you how you are, you say “livin’ the dream”. Seems pretty straight forward right?

Maybe, but probably not. The reason people quit the shining glorious dream of complete financial freedom through Forex is usually for one of two reasons.

1. Forex just isn’t for everyone.

And that’s okay, but that’s where it ends for some people. And that’s okay. 

2. They lose buckets of money, trying to sprint to the finish line, desperate to achieve the dream they were sold (or that they sold themselves). They chuck entire trading accounts upwards of $2,000.00 USD at the wall hoping that at least this time when they fail, they will learn some secret that will kick the doors open for them.

But that’s not how Forex works. And once they can’t afford to lose anymore money... They give up. Broke and pissed off, they regret the day that sparkle came to their eye. 

Whether fast or slow, it happens to everyone. We’ve all sat there hopeless and lost, stuck in the paradox of not knowing what you don’t know, so you don’t know what to do, to start knowing that which you don’t know. Tricky innit?

Yea. It’s frustrating.

So you get busy with life and generally forget. But as my acting teacher used to say, “you can’t pour from an empty cup”. Some people come back to it later with a little more life experience, and find that they’re able to see things a little differently. In fact I’ve found that a little perspective can go a long way. 

I didn’t get Forex. It just didn’t make sense. But the truth is, when I started, I wasn’t who I needed to be, in order to be successful at trading in the Foreign Exchange markets. I still might not be. But I’m closer to him. And I’ve come to realize slowly that as I live and grow, my perspective, discipline, and intuition change. Slowly, but they do. Hopefully more like Kudzu and not like a succulent, but still.

I’m not who I need to be. But I’m closer than I was. And to be honest, it’s been really fun. It’s been hard. Late nights, and long months doing nothing Forex related which leaves my feeling guilty. Guilty at not practicing my craft. But even when I’m not doing Forex, I’m still thinking Forex. After all, Forex is the way human psychology affects the exchange of money across international borders. And human psychology is present in every decision we make.

Like I said in my previous post, you can’t predict price because price is the result of 7+ billion people making an innumerable number of decisions every single day. But... we can relate to the way people make those decisions. And invariably, how people think.

The point is, stopping to rest is okay. Stopping to smell the roses is okay. Slowing down, is totally ok. Quitting is even ok. If it’s not for you, it’s not for you and you should find something that's fulfilling. But don’t quit because it gets hard. That’s not okay. Rest. Recover your strength so you can walk the journey and enjoy it at the same time. I don’t mind driving. I hate driving tired. There’s a big difference in what I take away from it. 

People quit Forex for many reasons. But because it’s hard should never be one of them. You don’t have to blow your life’s savings. But don’t think it’s going to be easy either. Rest and take time away from the charts so that you don’t burn out. 

That being said, I’d like to touch on the last trade we were looking at in AUDJPY.

This where price action was when I decided to close the trade. I closed it while it was in profit but it didn’t hit my target. As you can see in the speech bubble, my target price was now on the outside of the triangle walls. If I’m basing my trade on the expectation that price will bounce between the two lines, I should best hope that my exit is inside those lines. That being said, I took my money and walked away. Not easy to do considering it could go my way after I've left and then most people would have to live with the, “aww man I should have stayed in!”. But I’m cool with it. I don’t have to put it all on red. I’m cashing my chips, and I’m gonna go enjoy a drink while I rest at the bar. 

I might get back into this pair, but I’ll do so with a different strategy, the breakout strategy potentially. That is, only if everything lines up right.

Now as we get into the weekend, I can’t put in any trades. On a global scale, all Forex markets close Friday at 5pm and open Sunday at 5pm Eastern Standard Time. Any trades placed during this time will be entered into the market at whatever price the market opens up at Sunday night. Very rarely the same price that it closed at. All that being said, my next few posts will probably not have any entries but will instead have an in-depth analysis of different charts on various time frames. This is a good way to practice.

The thing with each pair is that it moves differently. And every pair moves differently from the way it moved 1-6 months ago. Here from May 2017 to May 2018, we can see that this pair (the Euro vs. the $) had a definite direction most of the time with strong pushes. Price rose through the months and even though it fell here and there, it mostly moved upward.

Here we see that from May 2018 to May 2019, price fell but it did so much more slowly. It consolidated most of the time (no definitive direction or trend, up or down). Price behaves differently at different periods in time. That is why Forex traders have to have a bag full of tools for different occasions. Our most powerful tool regardless of anything is called confluence. That is important to note. 

Here’s a comparison of the “trend” or average direction. From February 2019 to the beginning of June 2019 price fell. Up down, up down, but overall it fell. From June to now however, we start to it coming back up. Will this be a change in overall direction (a trend reversal) or could we see it start to play inside of channels in extreme cases of consolidation? Let’s break it down and see what happens.

The highest point looks like Batman ears. We call these price history formations Double Tops. It means that price rose up to it, then people started selling, it got to a point where people thought it was relatively cheap and started buying again, driving prices up once more. It essentially hit the same price twice, testing it out, but when it failed to break through this price level again, the bulls got exhausted and the bears rode it down. When this happens it usually means price is going to fall hard. And it sure did. A little news release happened today and it caused price to fall just a tad from the strong push it’s had in recovery of that double top, but it rose back up quickly and so only a big wick remained. The MA’s did cross which is important, but I will get to them next time. 

Here we are at the moment. Hungry for success standing outside of a closed shop in the rain looking through the window. We can’t trade but we can analyze and hopefully get ourselves in a good position for when the market opening back up on Sunday collides with what we know in a beautiful fire works display of confluence. It pushed past where the Batman ears had formed (that’s the yellow line). Between where it is now and the yellow line is little under a 35 pip channel. This could be just the space it needs to rest for a bit before continuing to sky rocket upwards. Perhaps it gets pushed back down. I don’t presume to know these things, but I do have plans for what it might do and more importantly I am ready to react at a moments notice. That is the life of a successful Forex trader. Free and ready. And I’m closer to that every day.

[all-alone-he-turns-to-stone]

A Milky Way gave me breath - chapter 5

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4

Resume of the fic/imagine: Reader is new to Beacon Hills High School. Her first day starts very badly, and the panic rises. Chance or destiny makes sure that a person well-accustomed to panic attacks passes by at the right time.

But a Milky Way can’t take away all the stress… Or maybe…?

In this chapter: Finally it’s the date! Nothing bad can happen… right?

Word count: 2414 (yeah longer for the last chapter!)

Ship: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Warning: contains social anxiety, panic attacks, but fluff and supportive subject

A/N: finally, the final chapter! I made it longer, and hope y’all love the ending! I really enjoyed writing this story, and I’m happy that so many people like it too; I didn’t think it would be that popular! So since this story is done, I have more time for requests! And I'll also write a void stiles fic!

It was the big day, and a mix of apprehension, fear, nervousness and excitement habited my whole body. The meeting was at 7 pm, in front of the cinema. It was only 5pm, and I was in front of my wardrobe trying to pick up a suit, for already 25 minutes. What should I choose? Simple, with my usual clothes a little big but comfortable? Remaining myself? Or take out my best clothes, those who haven't seen the light since my parents wedding? A dress? A skirt? Jeans? A shirt?

I bit my lower lip, pensive and nervous, my foot tapping regularly on the floor. I had no idea what to put on. Besides, I had not started to do my hair. Should I put on makeup? But we're going to see a movie, in the cinema, where the lights are off! It was useless to try making myself all pretty. Anyway, he was probably going to be more interested in the movie than me. And then, I was back to stress for nothing, like an idiot.

I sat on my bed, desperate, putting my head in my hands. I had tears in my eyes, I felt stupid to worry like that only for a date with a guy … a terribly cute and attractive guy, and oh how nice.

I blush just thinking about it. I got up, wiping my eyes to stare again at my wardrobe.

I made my decision.

The movie was starting at 7:30 pm, but we agreed to meet earlier in order to have good seats and popcorn. Faithful to myself and my fear of being late, I arrived an hour in advance. I decided to put on a pretty pale blue shirt with a simple pair of black jeans as an outfit. And for my hair, I decided to leave it natural.  I also put some light makeup on the edge of my eyes. So there I was, waiting in front of the cinema, the fear and the nervousness giving me very bad belly aches for almost an hour and this, while glancing at my cellphone to look at the time advancing, or If I had received a text message.

Time passed slowly, and the chill of the falling night shook me. I looked around hoping to see him arrive with his pretty smile, but the street was empty, except for the many people entering the cinema, laughing and holding hands. I watched them pass and sighed while consulting for an umpteenth times my cellphone, which was starting to seriously run out of battery.

19:50.

He was only 50 minutes late, and 20 minutes of missing movie, it wasn’t so bad … he was going to come, he promised me.

I put my arms against my body to warm myself. And the time went on, without any trace of the Milky Way boy anywhere. The sky was covering with menacing clouds and the moon disappeared beneath them.

Then the rain fell hard, something I hadn’t seen for ages. It is true that it often rained at Beacon Hills, but each time I do everything not to go out. I hate rain, I found it cold and sad.

20:36.

I closed my eyes with tears running down my cheeks. He wasn’t coming. Why would he come anyway…?

My hopes melted like a candle under the heat of a flame. And despite my hatred for the rain, I went out my shelter to walk home. I had come by bus, but no one was passing at that time. Stiles were supposed to take me home after the movie, but Stiles was not there and would not come. So I walked, one step in front of the other in the water that was accumulating on the side of the road, as sadness accumulated in my heart.

I didn’t notice, however, that my phone had died a long time ago.

Third Pov

“Shit, it really had to happen today, huh? Today, the only day I just want to spend without werewolves or other supernatural creatures that came out of nowhere to kill us? Is it too much asked? ”

“Shut up and help me walk …”

“No, Scott, I will not be silent! It was you who planned everything so that I could ask her to go out with me, one evening, Scott, and that same evening you asked me to come with you to see a dead body at the morgue? "Oh, it will not be long, you will not be late? ”“

Scott spat blood, holding his belly scarred by four distinct marks, scratches.

"I couldn’t know that the body wasn’t dead …”

Stiles rolled his eyes as he carried Scott on his shoulder to help him walk (stagger) into the empty corridors of the hospital basement where the morgue was, leaving a long streak of blood behind them.

“She will never want to talk to me after that, that’s for sure …”

“Stiles! I think it’s more important to settle our situation now than your missed date! "Scott interrupted as he saw the undead body in front of them, threatening, his yellow eyes shining in the dim light.

"Okay, we’re dead.”

Then, out of nowhere came a short-haired girl wearing short jeans with blue-glazed eyes and another girl with long black hair holding a not reassuring at all katana darkened on the enemy like two super entrained ninjas, and succeeded in putting him down in less than two seconds.

Stiles turned his face to his friend with a bewildered expression.

“You are the alpha and it’s a kitsune and a werecoyote who do all the work?”

Scott grunted, shooting Stiles with his red eyes.

“If he hadn’t opened my belly …”

“Yeah, yeah, excuses,” Stiles grumbled before walking up to the girls. Kira ran towards them (towards his boyfriend actually), and came to unload Stiles from his heavy load.

“Scott, are you okay?” “

"Yes, it will heal,” he replied before grinning a reassuring smile.

For his part, the only human of the group grabbed his cell phone to watch the time.

“Shit!”

He glared at the rest of the pack before looking at what a poor state he was, his clothes freshly bought for the occasion covered with blood.

“Run at your house to change, text all the excuses of the world and go join her,” his best friend said by giving him a friendly pat on the back to encourage him.

Stiles nodded and ran off.

His phone showed 20:03.

By the time he arrives at home, changes and leaves for the place of meeting, half an hour has passed and the rain has begun to fall. He had tried to text her almost twenty times, but all his messages remained unanswered. Stiles nervously poked his thumbs against the wheel of his jeep. He hoped she was still there waiting for him. That she would understand and accepts his apologies.

He hoped, but he knew there were slight chances that this would be the case.

When Stiles arrived in front of the cinema, he rushed out of his car without closing the door. Soon he got soaked by the rain. He looked everywhere, shouted her name, called her, but no answer. He even went inside the cinema. Nothing.

Fear and panic began to gain him and he had to lean against the wall to calm his breath to prevent a panic attack. It wasn’t the time. If Y / N weren’t in front of or in the cinema, she had to be on her way home, walking under the cold rain…

Stiles rushed towards his jeep and lit the headlights.

Reader pov

The road was long up to my house, and soaked like I was, I was going to be sick for sure. I was feeling the cold biting my bones. Luckily, the rain masked the tears that didn’t want to stop flowing.

A bright light lit up the street in front of me, sign that a car was about to pass. I walked away, hoping that the driver would see me and not sprinkle more water on me, but the car didn’t pass near me. It stopped behind, the engine still rumbling and I heard a door open.

“Y / N!”

My feet stopped moving by themselves and I rotated my body to look at the person who had just spoken. The Milky Way boy.

To see him in front of me, I didn’t know if I had to be relieved, offended or even sadder.

“You’re late …,” I managed to say after a while.

His face was defeated, sad and guilty. He kept licking his soaked lips and blinking quickly to clear his gaze from the water that seemed to blurry it. Then, Stiles spread his arms as a sign of defeat.

“I’m sorry … I did my best to arrive on time but …”

He didn’t finish his sentence, as if the reason behind his delay was private. I felt betrayed.

“Why … why have you invited me if you’re not even able to find a credible lie to explain why you’ve let me wait for hours, no news or text messages…”

I raised the tone to make myself be heard under the sound of the rain that buzzed in our ears.

“But I sent you tons of messages!” “

I bent my head and understood.

"My cellphone is dead …”

I passed a trembling hand on my face.

Stiles approached me and put his arms over my shoulders.

“You’re cold … come on, let’s get inside.”

I let myself go, sticking to him more than I thought I could. For the moment I was cold and the idea of ​​getting warm again seemed welcoming.

“But we missed the movie,” I mumbled sadly.

“I have a lot of great movies at home,” he answered, smiling.

It was the first time I went to Stiles. And it was also the first time I went into a boy’s room, which, moreover, apologized for his messy room.

After giving me a towel and lending a few dry and warm clothes, Stiles apologized and went to talk to his father who had just returned from work. He had to tell him why a wet girl in his room was wearing his clothes. I took advantage of it to look around. His bed was against the wall, walls that contained many posters. In the middle of the room, now stuck on the opposite wall for space was a big transparent table that police inspectors usually have to solve cases. It was covered with many pictures and unreadable inscriptions. But it wasn’t my business and despite the curious desire to look, I didn’t. That would’ve been rude of me.

I was waiting since a couple of minutes when I realized I was wearing Stiles’ clothes.

His clothes that had touched his pale skin. His clothes with a peculiar smell, a captivating scent.

I made sure that he was still far from the room to put the sweater sleeve near my nose to smell it. Immediately, a mixture of laundry soap and his own odor tickled my nose and raised the red to my cheeks. What was I doing?

“Everything is in order.”

I jumped more than I wanted when I heard him speak and lowered my arm immediately, not subtle. I hoped he had seen nothing!

Stiles lowered his head and scratched it nervously, looking at the ground before raising it, and stretching out his hand towards me.  He wanted me to take it? I didn’t move immediately, hesitant, but ended up taking it. His hand was large comparing to mine, and it was warm.

“Your hand is cold,” he whispered in a low voice before taking my other hand to warm them. I sniffled, embarrassed, and then crossed his magnificent look. My heart got even more excited, and I really hoped it would calm down.

“Yeah, I … I’m a little cold I think …” I mumbled, absorbed by his eyes that never looked away from me.

“I’m sorry again for …”

I nodded my head, not letting go of his gaze.

“You must have your reasons, I …”

He approached me, and I had to raise my head not to lose sight of his face. He was a few inches away, and strangely, except for my heart that was drumming loudly in my chest, I wasn’t afraid. My social anxiety was gone. I just felt very close to Stiles, safe. I didn’t need to hide. Of course, both of us had our little secrets, but at the time, it didn’t matter that much because I knew that very quickly there would be no barrier between us.

“So, you give me a second chance?” he whispered softly as he approached his face towards mine. My cheeks burned me, my legs became weak and my breathing accelerated.

I nodded positively.

He came closer again and I didn’t draw back. I was tired of running away, of avoiding people out of fear of being judged. I didn’t want to run away from Stiles.

So, it was I who take the initiative. I crossed the few inches that separated us and I put my lips softly against his. It was the first time I kissed a boy, so I was a little clumsy but soon Stiles guided me. He put his big hands against my waist to bring me closer and I found myself sticking to his chest. His lips moved slowly against mine so that I could get used to their shapes, textures, taste.

And it was very good.

I didn’t know what to do with my hands so I didn’t focus on them. I let them act on their own. They rested against his face and I found myself stroking his cheeks gently, and even passing a hand through his hair still wet by the rain.

When our mouths parted, I left my hands against his face, which was very close to mine. Our eyes never ceased to look at each other, magnetised.

I was still stroking his cheek when Stiles broke the silence.

“I … I think I love you, Y / N …”

My heart stopped beating as I understood the meaning of his words. But my gaze was suddenly attracted by something my thumb was touching on his cheek and I smiled.

“I love you too … my Milky Way.”

[hilswriting-blog]

Any Minute Now

Short fiction by Hilary J. MacDonald

The clock is ticking away with waves of clicks and tapping coming from fingers hitting keyboards. You could almost cut the tension in the air with a knife as everyone in the room scrambles to finish their work for the day. When the clock nears 5pm, the clicks and tapping start turning into shuffling of papers on desks and muffled footsteps on the carpet floor. As they start to leave one by one, sometimes in groups, I wish them a good evening from my desk and that I’ll see them again in the morning.

Those were the days. Back when I worked as a secretary for an advertising company in New York during the 60s and 70s. It was the simple 9-5 life. There was nothing special about it, but it was all I needed. My husband and I have four children so he also worked to make ends meet. It was tough at times, but by the grace of God we were able to get through it.

Roger and I are still happily married. In fact, he should be back any minute. He goes to the store every few days to pick up basic things like the milk. Sometimes it feels like he’s gone forever. Don Draper keeps me company while I wait though. He’s on the television everyday being an example of how not to live my life like mad men. But even he has some good qualities about himself.  

One of our daughters comes to visit us regularly which is very nice of her. She doesn’t have to do that. She helps me be more active and do things around the house like puzzles! She also brings the extra groceries that Roger doesn’t get. Every once in a while she brings my favorite pie: lemon meringue. It’s been a few days since she’s visited though, or anyone even. It’s starting to get lonely, but Roger should be back any minute now.

 ___

The burning lights fade out and a thunderous applause roars from the audience. “That’s a wrap!” echoing throughout the room. Everyone is feeling the same sense of accomplishment as we wrap up the last scene for the day. Cameramen are collecting their cables while the models and host exit the stage. The audience is starting to clear out one by one, sometimes in groups. I see if I can assist the members on set before we all go home for the evening.

Those were the days. In the heat of the Los Angeles sun, in the midst of the 1960s. The hustle and bustle of the Hollywood life was an everyday norm for me. I met my husband, Rich, on the set of our jobs at one of the Hollywood studios. He was impossible to resist with looks like his. We got married and shortly after had a daughter; the rest is history.

Rich should be back any minute. He’s gone to get milk. However, the lovely Bob Barker is keeping me company, telling me to “come on down!” for a chance to win my dream vacation. Though, I would never be able to go because I’m pretty much stuck in this lazy boy recliner. I live vicariously through the contestants on the screen and can only imagine the amazing time they will have on their awarded vacations. My dream vacation would be going to Greece. The food, the salty breezes blowing through my hair, the crystal blue water. An old fart like me can dream.

Our daughter, Samantha, hasn’t visited for a few weeks now. I don’t know what happened because she used to visit Rich and I all the time. She has a busy life that she needs to focus on – I don’t blame her for not wanting to just watch the television with me. Samantha never liked me being glued to that darned thing anyways. Mmmm, she always brings the best pies when she visits though.

I hear a rustling coming from the hallway outside of the family room.

“Hey honey,” I call out because Rich should be back any minute now.

___

ER nurses burst through the door rolling a stretcher with them. All I hear is multiple people yelling for doctors as they steer the victim into the emergency operating room. With the clipboard attached to the stretcher in my hand I try to record the jumbled details about this patient. Running to my desk I let the clipboard go, swinging wildly, as I go to page for a doctor to come immediately. I record the patient’s information and wait behind the desk to get out of the way. Almost instantly one doctor comes flying down the hall and stops at my desk. Our eyes lock for what feels like an eternity. I can’t focus on the words he’s saying so I just point to the operating room where the nurses took the patient. He gives a flirty grin and runs off. That was the day I met Alex. So gentle and graceful in his job as an ER doctor, always with such passion. This I saw when our eyes locked that very day. I worked as an ER receptionist during the 60s-70s at a hospital in Seattle, alongside Alex. Within a year of seeing each other we got married, settled down, and had twins. We both took less shifts at work so we could put more of our time and effort into raising our children.

           But those were the days. Our children are now grown up and it’s just Alex and I. Alex is still such a great man and tries to take care of me the best that he can by running little errands like getting the milk. Actually, he should be back from the store any minute. I’m happy here in my lazy boy recliner watching Derek “McDreamy” Shepherd woo the ladies of Grey’s Anatomy. I have definitely found my McDreamy. Mine is loyal and dear to me. My daughter is also very loyal and dear to me. She does the favor of visiting us every once in a while, but it’s been a long time since I last saw her. To make life seem a bit more exciting she gets me doing things like trying to knit or helping bake my all-time favorite, lemon meringue pie. The recipe we follow uses milk, but Alex should be back any minute now.

           I hear a rustling coming from the hallway outside of the living room.

To my surprise, a woman pokes her head in. I thought it would be Alex who should be back from getting the milk, but it’s this strange woman. Scared, my immediate response is to tell her to get out. A concerned look spreads across her face as she still stands there holding crumpled up newspaper. I become confused when she doesn’t leave.

           “Vivian, it happened again, didn’t it?” she spoke softly while she was occupied with that newspaper. Even more confused I stare at her with a blank expression. A discerning sigh comes out of her.

           She comes over, places the newspaper on the table, and sits down on the footrest in front of me. We make deliberate eye contact.  

           “Vivian, I’m Sherry, your–“

           “You’re my daughter. Yeah, yeah, I know, Sherry.” I snap at her out of embarrassment that she thinks I don’t even know who my own daughter is.

           “No, I’m your caretaker, Vivian.” I sit there, still, with that blank expression. “I come here, to your house, every day to care for and assist you. I understand that this is probably going to be hard for you, but your memory has been declining over the years, and lately it has gotten worse. Your therapists say you’re suffering from short-term and now long-term memory loss; symptoms of dementia. This started around five years ago after the accident.” She takes another sigh and she places her smooth hands over mine. “I’m sorry that you have to go through this again, Vivian. Your husband was involved in a hit-and-run accident while he was out getting milk… and he passed away.”

           Feelings of rage, grief, and disarray boil up inside me, and I can’t hold them back. “Where is– my daughter?! I need her. Where?! I need to– talk to her right– now!” I managed to get out gasping for breath between words. Tears rolling down my face.

           “You don’t have any children, you miscarried when you were 21. I try to keep you away from that TV because the therapists say that with your recollection issues you start confusing what your actual memories are with what you’re watching on TV.”

           After the silence of me being stunned, Susan gets up, takes the newspaper and starts wrapping the glass candle holder that was on the table.

           “Don’t touch my stuff! What are you doing?” This imposter is getting on my nerves.

           “Your memory has gotten so bad that you can’t take care of yourself anymore. I’m helping you pack your belongings so you can move to a 24-hour care home. I know you’ll love it there, Vivian. There’s gonna’ be different caretakers so I won’t be able to make you your lemon meringue pies anymore, but they have dessert after every meal, every single day. You’ll love that.” She has such sincerity in her voice. This calms me a bit. Sandra takes the ball of newspaper she’s holding into the other room.

           “Lemon meringue pie. Yeah, that would be nice,” I think as I struggle to get out of my recliner and walk over to the window.

           I draw back the walnut-coloured curtains of the living room window. Before me is the drizzling rain falling from an ominously clouded sky. Children are running down the street with their toys headed for cover. A cat jumps off of our fence scrambling underneath a shed; a young man opens an umbrella and holds it above his lady as they lock hands and continue strolling along.

           My left hand wipes tears away and I feel the cold metal of my wedding band graze my face. Delightful thoughts scatter through my mind. My hands rest on the window pane as I stare down the street, searching for the familiar. A smile cracks through my lips.

           Leonard will be back any minute now.

 The End.

[namjoonchronicles]

Handcuffs & Pretty Boys - [EXO] Chanyeol Detective!Au #30 [Final]

[Part 29]

[A/N] Go get it boi.

Do you ever come across an emotion of ultimate acceptance? It's expensive and rare. When you kiss someone and they really took you in; that's how you made Chanyeol feel, accepted. Now Chanyeol didn't fall for you as soon as he saw you. But you gave him a vibe he had never considered real. You didn't kiss him to impress. Chanyeol carries himself with a mysterious allure, he seems to stay in a zone he's most comfortable in; not too close to make connection, not too far to be disposed.

Chanyeol lives his life tiptoeing around people. Always too afraid what other's think of him, having nowhere to lean on, a rotating soul with no focal point, he was a fleeting kite with no anchor. And when he found you, he found home.

Your thoughts, they tumble against each other. You find yourself running on foot with a phone close to your ears. "If you don't tell me where he is, Yixing I will kill you!" You cried to the phone. People are starting to stare your frantic calls but you didn't care. The time is urging you to be quick on your feet, you don't know where they are taking you but you felt the need to keep moving, even if thee's no clear location in mind. Yixing understood the urgency but he had promised Chanyeol. So he is contemplating in front of his desktop, pinching the bridge of his nose in dire conflicting thoughts. "You can't kill me, I'm a thousand miles away in Beijing." He snorted.

"I know what kills you, I know where your wife is, Yixing, don't play with me." You threatened. "You won't kill her..." Yixing slapped on a soulless smile. "If you don't tell me, Yixing," you spun in place, in the middle of an intersection, looking like you're about to cry, and you look up to the sky at 5PM, breathing, "...you'll kill me."

With the spin of the barrel, bullets fully loaded with gun, Chanyeol aims at the empty can of soda before taking his jacket and zipped himself up. He let himself relax on some empty thoughts only to lead himself back into the image of you. Leaning his head back, he sighs and smiled. "Why do you always come when I'm seeking tranquility?" Chanyeol couldn't love you, he shouldn't and he can't. Job wise, he's better off alone. Morally, your father indirectly caused his father's death. Love wise, you deserved better.

When Chanyeol first saw you, he wasn't sure what it was. You were caught staring at him from a distant and when he helped you gather your things, he noticed your sparkling eyes. He just wasn't sure why. He hadn't seen those kind of eyes before. People rarely look him in the eye. They talk about him, to him, make choices for him as if he wasn't there. He got the first sense of attention from you. And it was a lot to take. It was overwhelming. He chose to ignore a whole lot of it. He should be pretending not to care, but it gets difficult when every time he gets a red bean filled bun in his bag when he got out of the library. Sometimes he gets an umbrella if it rains, only to pass it to other girls who needs them.

One day, Chanyeol waited behind a vending machine to see who puts food and notes on his bag all the time. He left his bag in a open locker outside the library purposely. He waited quite awhile until a small petite figure comes by, slid in two buns and reach behind her bag for a sticky note. And then she steps away. Chanyeol went to his bag, unzips them to see the bun and a sticky note with encouraging words on. He went after her. "Hey." Clawing your bag's strap with his fingers from behind. He could see that you were horrified. You planned to run real quick, but he smiled. Awkwardly. "...I just want to say thank you." He blurted when you turn away to leave.

"I'm not sure how to..." he scratches the back of his head, smiling to the floor, "I'm Park Chanyeol. Can we be friends?"

But your answer were surprising. It took him awhile to process. "No." You shot, with a serious face. "...No we cannot be friends." You blinked and started walking away. It was odd. At least for Chanyeol, it was. And it was from then onwards, Chanyeol starts noticing you. The buns stopped coming, the sticky notes too, the umbrellas. So when it rained one evening, Chanyeol shield you with his own leather jacket, over your head. "Where's your umbrella?!" He roared, afraid that his voice are dimmed by the heavy rain. "I gave it all to you!" You matched his tone, and, "...Where's yours?!" You asked, squinting your eyes at his tall stature. "I gave it away for someone who needs them more." He said. "Great." You sighed angrily. "I'm hungry." He suddenly say.

"So?" You scrunched your face. "Will you have dinner with me?" Chanyeol blurted. Now, get this. It was in the middle of college field, no shelter available when the rain started pouring down, and he is shielding you with his leather jacket, asking you out on a date. "Your timing is amazing!" You shrieked. "Is that a yes or a no? You have to be straight with me, I can't read between the lines." He darted. He brought you to his car, and he was rummaging at the back seat where stuff piles up. He frowns at first while you try to wring out water from your hair. Then, after much effort he let out a loud, "Aha!" He took out a hair dryer. "Where'd you get that?"

"It's battery powered hair dryer. You go first." Chanyeol climbed to the driver seat. "I think I'm good..." You declined. "Why...no, you got a longer hair, so you should," Chanyeol sneezes. "Yeah no. Listen to me, you're going to catch a cold if you don't get dry first. I have a doctor roommate, I'll be fine." You said and grabbed the hair dryer from him. Before he starts protesting, you turned the dryer on while Chanyeol sat quietly, watching the rain hitting against the car window. "I don't think the rain's going to stop soon." He said. You turned off the dryer to hear him, "What did you say?" He repeated and you chuckled. "Right, you said you were hungry... there's a diner nearby." You said, running your fingers through his gorgeous light brown locks.

Chanyeol held one finger up and rummaged through the pocket behind the seat and took out two buns. "We have these." You bit your lips and smiled. The fact that he kept all the buns you gave him was out of this world. "Why?" You asked. "What do you mean." He shoved half of the bun into his talented mouth without a problem. "You didn't like me, you rejected me. You said we can be friends..." You tore them open with your teeth. "...I didn't say I don't like you, I said can we be friends, don't all relationship starts that way?" You looked at him bewildered. By what he just said, and how casually he said it, it couldn't be the first time he's been with a girl. "...I get it." You nodded to the bun, smiling. "How many girls did you get with that honey buttered words of yours?"

Chanyeol chews everything up with a nonchalant look on his face, answering, "...One. You." He didn't even look up at you to see how you reacted. "You have to get warm, do you have anything dry?" You changed the subject. Chanyeol hovers half of his body to the back compartment. "A blanket, a varsity jacket and a T-shirt," he turns to catch a suspicious look on your face. "Sometimes I travel long hours and have to sleep in the car." He explained. "Are you sure?" You crossed your arm. "Gosh, why do you have so many trust issues?" he gushed at you. "Because." You shrugged. He got off his shirt and you got off yours, trusting that he doesn't look at you when you changed, and he really didn't. He was honest.

"Do you place buns to all the other guy's bag too?" He asked. You shook your head, hugging your legs. His over sized T-shirt went over your knees, looking like a mini-dress. "And the sticky notes?" He asked again. "Nope."

"Why did you do that?" "Are you reeling out a confession out of me?" "Am I? Is that what it sounds like? Is there a confession?" "Wow. Douche bag." You kicked his knee, playfully. He chuckled.

You started to play with the seat belts. The car is a bit old, so the things inside was a little fascinating to you. Everything was fun and games until your hair got stuck in the reels. "Chanyeol? Help."

"Why, what's happening." "My hair got stuck in the loop, I can't get it out." "Serves you right." He spat. You roared his name. "OK, hold on." Chanyeol went over to your side and start to work it out. He had nothing in his varsity jacket, his cologne still lingers and you were getting light headed for some reason. His collarbone is so close to your nose right now. He's muttering words out, something about the reel got your hair strands, and maybe something about cutting your hair off. But you weren't responding. Chanyeol lowered his eyes to your level, face just inches away from each other. "All done." He whispered and you looked up to him, swallowing a gulp of spit. Then you closed the gap between you two, puckering your lips onto his. Chanyeol was taken by surprise. He let you take over and lead the kiss because he wasn't sure what to do.

One thing led to another, and that's the story of how you spend the night with him, in his car. To which you woke up alone in, with his varsity jacket and blanket, the next morning without Chanyeol, leaving you nothing but bite marks on your wrist and his car key.

Chanyeol was kidnapped that morning. He was going to comeback to the car after purchasing hot coffee but he never made it back to you. He couldn't. He was flown across the country, unconscious and brainwashed for about two weeks maybe three, he wasn't quite sure. He was awakened, splashed with ice cold Antartic water, almost every time. his hair pulled back. he was insulted at, peed on, a living punching bag. "What is your name!" The instructor would roar in his ear. He starts singing the national anthem. Every time he was inquired the question, he sang the national anthem on top of his lungs. He was tied in wire and immersed in the sea water to give up his own name, but he wouldn't. He was hanged by the tower in cold winter, threatened his life but his loyalty to his nation was intact.

"You think she's in love with you, soldier?! She'll forget about you! You ain't the only guy she's seeing! This ain't a soap opera! Girls don't last long!" Chanyeol's gaze burns straight ahead as the general screams in his face. "...You glaring at me? Son!? You have something to say about that?!" Chanyeol throws a spit to the floor he was kneeling on. His body persevered horrifying assaults. They start to show on his ripped body, he doesn't even have a patch of skin without bruises or cuts anymore. And his training proceeded for four more years. With no pictures of you, all he had was your memories. He was surprised he lived this long. With just that.

That was then. His guns clicks and he shut the main door behind him. He got into the car and when he opened his car door and entered, the other side did too. "What are you doing." He gruff. "Shut up, start driving." You growled. "I'm not going anywhere until you step out of the car, young lady." He took his hand off the initiator. "Well, too bad, I'm a great driver," you start to climb on his lap. "What are you doing." He sounded tired. "...You said you won't drive." You roared back. He clenched his jaws as you sat back to the passenger side. "Okay, but you're staying in the car."

"Permission to nag." You asked him as the car starts moving. "...Regrettably, granted." He answered. "How dare you make plans without me. I thought you've finally got into your senses during the few days I was with you, I'm afraid not! You were as selfish as you were four years ago, sorry, six years ago. Is there anything coming out of your mouth that aren't lies, Chanyeol? How shallow do you think I am? Ha?"

"I don't think you're shallow." He lazily protested as he make a turn. "Oh really? Lies! This is what you've been doing to me, you shitty ass friend. Am I your laughing stock? Do I look a girl to you, Chanyeol? Do I finally look like a girl to you now?" You squared your shoulders at him. "I always think of you as a girl." He glances around with lazy eyes. "OMG wow. Why did I ever consider you..." You rolled your eyes at him.

Chanyeol breathes in and sighed. "I'm a police officer and you're looking at me as if I'm a child." "You're not a child." "Is that why you didn't tell me about your plans to see Sanha on your own?" "It's not just Sanha now, it's Minseok and I don't want you to be involved. It's getting really late now, and I can't leave you alone. Promise me," He pulled before a large warehouse, "...When Wolf gets here, you'll not be with him."

"No." You groaned.

What did he meant you can't join him?

You looked at him bewildered as he cast the car engine off, his eyes wandering to his dashboard before his hands got busy to grab his gun in the lower compartment of your seat. He keeps one in his vehicle in case you need them. 'What makes you think you have the authority to stop me from participating in this arrest? You know I've been apart of this investigation since day one...' You searched for his eyes but Chanyeol's busy loading his extra bullets than to listen to you.

'It'll be too dangerous.' He answers simply, opening the Range Rover's car door and hoisting himself out of it. And you followed right after. 'This is not acceptable Chanyeol!' You chased after him and he spun around angrily. 'Don't make me do things I don't want to do.' He warned.

He will never be able to live a day if anything happens to you. Even if it's just a scratch on your skin. 'How dare you tell me what to do.' You growled at him. Chanyeol rolled his eyes at you. 'Come here.' He grumbled and took your wrist to stand underneath a lamp post.

'There's so many things in my life I have zero controls on...' Chanyeol softens his voice. '...so you aimed to control me?' You yanked your wrist out of his grasp, successfully. 'Not control.' He took them in his grip again, and this time, he put on a cuff around them and latch the other to handrail next to the lamp post. 'Hate me. Kick me. Punch me. Do whatever you want with me. But I won't risk losing you. Not now. Not ever.' Chanyeol took a few steps back, wiping his hand on the back of his jeans, looking down at the curb where you stood.

Not control.

Chanyeol's hand slid down one side of your face. He let one of your wrist cuffed, the other free. The night lamp flickers above both of you. He brought his lips down to yours and he,

He kissed you. Not control.

But protect.

He rested his right hand behind your neck and tilted your chin up to meet his lips properly. His mouth mold themselves on yours like they're meant to be there. His lips felt like home. You became light headed instantly. Your eyes flutter close as he uses his body to push your backed against the rails that he cuffed your wrist with.

Your other hand clutched on the hem of his jacket lightly. You neither pull him near nor push him far. He poured everything he had into the kiss. His emotion, his desperation, his unanswered questions and secrets. Taking the opportunity of you being cuffed. He is about to enter the enemy's lair alone and should he die without the chance of confessing to you, at least he had you tasting him. And with that, maybe you'll miss him a bit when he's gone.

With a small peek through his lashes, he saw your cuffed drew up to float to touch him but was held back by the cuff he put on. So Chanyeol slid his hand down that needy hand of yours and clasped them gingerly.

Maybe he shouldn't have done it. The kiss.

He's addicted now. To your lips.

He backs away when you were wanting more. He turns his whole body facing away from you. His warmth disappears and it instantly angered you. Odd. This wasn't you.

You called him. Softly. Almost a whisper. He starts to move. He starts to step away. He marches.

And so, you urgently called his name, this time, with a lot more strength, 'Chanyeol!'

And then, 'Don't leave me like this. Please don't leave me. Don't leave me again! If you don't let go of me right now, I will fucking kill you! If you don't come back, Chanyeol I swear!' You cried. The metal cuffs rattled against the rails. But Chanyeol didn't stop. He kept on walking. And his eyes were fire, marching straight to where the enemy is.

'I'll come back and free you. And if I don't; someone else will." Chanyeol never looked back. "But I don't want someone else." You sniffed. "You don't deserved to be killed by anyone else but me Park Chanyeol, you hear me?!"

Chanyeol smiled at the ground before turning around to you and blew you a kiss. You kicked it away. "Give me a real one!" You roared. "Baby, you look pretty, tied up like that." He winked and jogged to the warehouse, leaving you behind.  

The eye of the blade dug into Minseok's porcelain skin, and blood pooled at the tip of it as Kyungsoo put on a sinister smile on his face. Minseok groans in pain, teething the fabric Kyungsoo thoughtfully cast into his mouth. "Do you know why inflicting pain on others is fun?" He continued to trail the blade down the insides of Minseok's fore arm. "The face that they make fuels you. And then it feeds you with an adrenaline rush you cannot find elsewhere. That's why it's addictive." Kyungsoo ran his tongue on his lower lip as he wiped the blade from Minseok's blood on a white cloth handed by his assistant. "I'm still deciding what to do with you. Brazenly coming into my casino villa with fake chips of yours, trying to fool me. Naughty-naughty boy." Kyungshoo shake his head.

In the same warehouse, slightly at the opposite end, was a room. A shed. Sanha's poking the nail he found on the dusty floor, into the door knob, trying to pick the lock. But fails. He conceded by banging on the metal door, causing a ruckus, only to be ignored, since he was so far in, the warehouse, no one heard him. The padlock rattles outside. Kyungsoo had him caged like a dog. "Truth be told, Kyungsoo is never going to let us leave." A voice came from one of the dark corners. "Shut up, Rocky." Sanha hissed. "We're disposable. That's why he took us in." Sanha flew to Rocky, grabbing him by the collar. "You are maybe okay with dying here, but I'm not! I will get out of this, and I will leave you behind." Sanha threw Rocky back to the floor.

"Naive." Rocky cussed. Sweats beading on his forehead as he came back leaning against the door, yelling, "Help! Save us!" Only to drift far and far away from any human.

A team of black van came from the main street and you knew it was Wolf and maybe Chanyeol's back up squad. Wolf came running to you as soon as his eyes laid on you. "Please don't tell me he went inside alone." He sighed. "Yes he did." You nodded to confirm. "What's the plan?" He asked. "I don't know. I just know that he's inside, with Kyungsoo and Minseok. And he think Sanha's inside there as well."

"Who's Minseok?" Joonmyeon asked and that's when a team of masked men, with helmets and full black suit, surrounded Joonmyeon, pointing their assault rifles at him. "...Get on your knees now! Place both of your hands on the ground! Do it now! Now!" Joonmyeon didn't put up a fight and followed the instructions. What in the world is going on.

"Kim Joonmyeon, you are under arrest for possession of narcotics, in your premises of Songpa-gu street, and signing your name under suspicious chemicals for an unspecified use by using your national clearnace to export, import and produce the following drugs: meth, cocaine, a number of designer drugs under the comfort of your position. You are also charged with embezzlement with the profit you obtained from your clubs through drug lords. You are guilty for receiving bribery and misusing your government officer privilege." Your eyes widened to Wolf. "I needed the money...I needed the money!" Joonmyeon cried as he was brought away.

"Team A, assist. Team B, secure the perimeter. Team C, bombs are implanted, keep your hand on the trigger and wait for my command." A mysterious instruction came out from one of the ear pieces. Joonmyeon was lift off of the ground in a flash and brought away. And just then, a man in suits jumps out of one of van's back doors with a languid stride. "I'm Ji Chang Wook, I'm the director of tactical moves, pleased to meet you, Mrs. Park." He smiled. He was handsome, and moderately attractive. He is either at the same level as Chanyeol or higher. "I'd shake your hands but I'm cuffed. And I'm not Mrs. Park." You corrected him. "Oh you will be." He winked. "I'd help but, keys are with Chanyeol, so."

And then suddenly, a bomb detonated. Changwook covered you with his jacket. Debris were little but they were no less dangerous.

Changwook spun to the van, "That wasn't protocol." He sped to the van, leaving you behind. "Agent Park, report. Agent Park, status! Fuck." He decided to suit up like the others and went in. "Come in, now!" Changwook heard from his ear piece and pointed his fore finger and middle finger into the all entrance. The team understood the gesture and barged in, as told. Smoke filled the air, the fog covered and limited your eye sight. You hear cackling from the fire, and alone, still cuffed, and nothing to see, you're even more frightened if someone got hurt. You heard dragging. Two figures in the distant, Sanha was limping with another boy. The stretchers were brought in as he collapse. He could barely open his eyes at you, but he did extend his arm to be caught by you.

Your wrist are starting to redden from the force you are putting on. Your fingers starts to tremble. Tears won't stop and you caught yourself praying hard. Because you don't see the face you've been wanting to see. Another bomb went off. You caught bodies flying out the window. You see officers coughing through the fog, taking off their mask, and vomiting. It was chaotic. "Bomb 3, deactivated."

"Bomb 4, deactivated." "Bomb 5, nullified." "Bomb 6, alive."

So that is one more bomb to worry about.

Changwook looks around for a familiar face, but apart from lifeless bodies, he hasn't seen anyone. There's fire everywhere. "Put the gun down, Kyungsoo." Changwook heard a voice. Chanyeol's pointing the gun at Kyungsoo who had the trigger, gun targeted to his head. "I will not pay for my sins!"He announced. Gun shots. Twice. Blurred picture. Total black out.

. . .

"What are you thinking about Chanyeol?" "Nothing. You?" "Nothing." "We're both are lying, aren't we?" "Yeah. OK, I'll go first, and then you. I'm thinking about the decisions my father made throughout his lifetime. I hate it when I'm worried about my family and they looked like they're fine. It just sucks."

"Lucky you still have a family to worry about." Chanyeol's gaze stuck upon the ceiling. "I'm sorry." You blurted, looking up at him. Pulling his arm to make a pillow out of it. "For what." He chuckled. "Things." You sighed. "I know what your father did, it wasn't his fault." Chanyeol shut his eyes. "Get some sleep, and stop worrying about things. And stop saying you're sorry. You couldn't have done anything." Chanyeol set his wrist on his forehead as he sleeps.

"Do you still think that kissing me was a mistake?" You inched closer to his jaws. "Shh. I'm trying to sleep." He whispered softly. "I don't think you were a mistake." You said to him. "I was in the heat of the moment. I say things I don't mean. Now, sleep." Chanyeol covered your eyes and gave you a peck on the lips before pretending it never happened.

. . .

Is this it?

The last bomb went off. Changwook was the last one to walk out on two feet. He took off his helmet and you were devastated, You turned away and held yourself on the rails Chanyeol cuffed you on, until a hand slid down your forearm and with it you could feel rubble from little pebbles, it was dirty and ashed. It slid a key into the hole and set you free.

"Your timing is amazing." You breathed.

"If you don't wife the fuck out of me, I'm going to husband the fuck out of you until you get sick of me." You spit at him. He lowers his lips to your ear and whispered. "I wanna put a baby in you, Mrs. Park." Chanyeol pulled away and bit his lip, looking at you. You grabbed his face and kissed him the way you imagined you would. You wrapped your legs around his hip and circled your arm around his neck.

And of course, like it's destined to be, the rain falls on top of both of you. "We always seem to make out wherever there's rain or water." You spoke to his lips. "I'm only honest when it rains." Well, it better rain frequently from now on.

"Why do you choose to be a police officer?" Your best friends asked you as she was waiting in the labor room. "Handcuffs and pretty boys, babe. Handcuffs and pretty boys." You smirked. Taking out your handcuffs, "Handcuffs," you caught Chanyeol as he came back from buying a juice from a vending machine, and cuffed his wrist with yours, you pointed, "...Pretty boys."

"What the fuck." Chanyeol muttered. "Pay back time." You scrunched your face at him.

[theworld-andi-blog]

What to do in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

So you’re going to Kuala Lumpur, are you?

Well, I just spent a week there myself, and it was a great to get out of the rut I’ve been in here in Thailand. I’ve been living in Thailand since October 2015. I did a lot of traveling in the beginning, but since moving to Krabi in November, I haven’t done much traveling at all. Since my visa ran out, it was time for a trip! Never want to overstay my welcome. Especially in a foreign country…

Anyway, going from Krabi Town (a city with my basic needs like coffee shops and plenty of 7Elevens) to a big city like Kuala Lumpur was a nice change of scenery. Right across the street from my hostel was a shopping mall with all my favorite stores, restaurants were just a stone throw away, and I even had a room with air-con! I’m by no means deprived in Thailand, but it’s nice to have some extra comforts sometimes!

Cities never sleep, and the same goes for KL. I spent 7 days there with my friend Kaitlyn, and I would say 7 days is a bit too long. When you’re in a city longer than you need, it gets easy to become a little bored. However, it can also give you time to relax, hit a local coffee shop, or even take a nap after running around all day. It all depends on your personal travel needs. For me, a day or two less would have been just fine!

In our week, we covered the must-see tourist spots and fit in a few other activities, as well. Here’s what we did to give you some ideas for your trip:

1. Petronas towers

These are a must. It’s super touristy and just one of those things you can’t leave KL without doing. There’s plenty of spots all over the city where you can snap a pic of the towers off in the distance. For a closer picture that can fit you in with the twins, head the mall area. There’s a small park (this is not the KLCC park) across from the entrance to the towers. There, you’ll find some stairs there where you can stand at the top and your travel buddies (or a helpful tourist in passing) can help you snap your cheesy pic that will be the staple of your trip!

**keep in mind that there is a constant flow of tourists here. Go early for an uninterrupted picture!

2. Sky Tower

You can go to the top of the Petronas Towers if you want to see a landscape of the city from up above. I didn’t go, but a couple people in my hostel said it was around 85RM (~19USD). My friend and I chose to do the Sky Tower instead. This way, we could go to the sky deck to see the same beautiful landscape and get the Petronas Towers in the background. The top floor has 2 glass boxes that shoot out a bit and you can take pictures in. Maybe avoid those if you’re not a heights person. I looked down while trying to sit and embarrassingly lost my balance! It was 105RM (~24USD), but worth the extra in my opinion. While we were there, the security said they were building a coffee shop that would be done in the next 6 months. So if you’re there, please have what’s sure to be an expensive coffee on the rooftop for me while enjoying the view. I know I would have if I could have!

3. Heli Pad for Drinks

It rained almost every evening of our trip. So, when the clock struck 5pm and there were no rain clouds in sight, we called an Uber (yes, KL has Uber!) and headed there before Mother Nature could change her mind! The drinks are on the expensive side, as one could easily assume. A bottle beer was 22-30RM depending on the size. All other drinks (cocktails, pints of beer, wine) were 30RM or above. If you enjoy sipping on a drink while watching the sun go down over the city, definitely hit this rooftop. It opens at 5 and the helipad itself opens at 6.

4. VCR Coffee Shop

As I said before, sometimes extra time is a good thing. It’s nice to have some time to unwind, write, soak up some free Wifi and have coffee other than of the instant variety served at your hostel (even though that coffee was free. Pros and cons…). There are coffee shops all over the city! We went to VCR. It was a cool and relaxing place with plenty of space to sit and enjoy a variety of coffees, pastries of meals. Cheapest coffee is about 9RM. Meals are more expensive. I had a salad for maybe 19RM (can’t quite remember), but since I had only been eating 6RM shawarmas, the financial sacrifice seemed worth is for my insides.

5. Central Market & Petaling Street

Shopping isn’t for everyone. And it certainly isn’t for those lacking in self-control and backpack space (oops…). I love the markets in South East Asia! While some say “if you’ve seen one, you’ve them all,” I always enjoy strolling the markets and stall hopping. I was in desperate need of a backpack that fit my laptop, and Petaling street had plenty of options for good prices. Bring your best smile and bargaining skills ladies and gents! There’s also places in the area where you can find some cheap food. Food & shopping!? …Yep, I’m there!

6. Batu Caves

Okay to be totally honest, I found the Batu Caves a bit anti-climactic. If you have the time, it might be worth the visit as it seems to be another one of those must-see tourist spots. Maybe me not being so wowed was due to the fact that it was raining, part of it was under construction, and I am not a fan of monkeys being within arm’s reach. Regardless, taking public transportation there is easy and it only cost 2.6RM from KL Sentral to get there.

7. Le Noir Rooftop Movie Night

If you have the time, I definitely recommend going here. It’s something a little off the beaten path, and a great way to relax. You get to enjoy a movie, popcorn and a free drink on a beautiful rooftop. With the Petronas Towers in the distance (like I told you…there a staple of the city!) and your personal pair of headphones, you can unwind and enjoy a quality movie night with a beautiful view to surround you.

8. Ladies Nights/Happy Hours

If you are a lady you are certainly in luck. There are numerous places throughout the city on various nights offering free drinks to ladies. It is a limited selection, but if you enjoy a variety of drinks and want to save some money (because let’s be real…sometimes we lose way more than we intended to a good night out), then find your local ladies night and enjoy! Remember to always drink responsibly!

9. The National Mosque of Malaysia

Absolutely go to the mosque. They have visiting hours for non-Muslims and it’s a beautiful building with a quiet and calming atmosphere. There are robes for people to cover themselves before going in. I would recommend bringing a wide-angle lens camera, like a go-pro if you have one. Those photos came out way better than the ones I took with my iPhone. Near the main prayer room (where non-Muslims are not allowed to enter) there are numerous free pamphlets with tons of information on the Islamic religion. I took only 5 but it was a wealth of information that I hadn’t known before. It was a great learning experience!

10.   Take Pictures with Street Art

Be sure to do your research! Found a place with great street art online, decided to go, and there was basically nothing there. Ya win some, ya lose some haha. We still got some good pictures, but it was one expensive Uber to get there and not much else around. A little extra research would have saved us a little extra money, so be sure to be thorough.

11. One thing I wish I had done: go to No Black Tie! I love live music way more than going to a bar or club with a DJ. It always makes for a really fun atmosphere and I’m low-key really envious of anyone with even a little musical talent (there isn’t a musical bone in my body).  No Black Tie is a jazz bar in KL. Some nights there are no covers and you just have to buy a drink or two. Other nights there are covers but you don’t have to buy a drink. Hopefully, if you’re into live music, you have the time to check it out!

Hope this helps! Let me know if you want more information, or have any cool things to add. Safe travels!