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madlori · 2 months ago

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Sometimes the delulu IS the solulu.

After some thought, and reading a lot of really insightful thoughts here and on Discord, I think I've reached a conclusion.

I'm going full tinhat. Not in an unhinged way, though.

I don't think this is the end.

I'm not going to count on it. I'm barely going to hope for it. But I am going to...keep an eye out for it.

The one common refrain we've heard from each other is that this did not feel like a permanent breakup. It felt so obviously and blatantly like a setup for Buck to fight for the relationship. It was that "one partner freaks out a bit and the other has to show their commitment" relationship hurdle which is so common it's a trope. In fact, most of us assumed that's just what it was...until those interviews

Now, I do not put Tim Minear up on some kind of pedestal of writerly greatness - far from it. And he did not write this episode, but the plotlines all go through him.

BUT.

He has always been very attached to Tommy as a character and to this relationship. He loves it. He loved red string theory so much that he wrote it into this episode. And I'm about halfway convinced he's in love with Lou but that's beside the point. (I mean, we get it, Tim.)

Tommy's what he always said he wanted to get for Buck. Firefighter, integrated into the 118, yadda yadda, we've been over this a lot. Someone he chooses, someone he works to build something with. Someone who shows up for him. He had Buck SAY in this episode that he'd never felt like this since Abby.

The thread of Tommy wanting a found family like Buck's. The intense settled/caregiving vibe of 8x05. It all felt so...purposeful. And yes, I agree that this could have been done just to punch up the angst for Buck when it ends. But that's not the only explanation.

The many, many comments of wanting to move Buck along in his personal life. Oliver wanting to do settled, domestic storylines with him. Giving Tommy the big hero romcom entrance in that hospital.

And what now? Cycle Buck through another love interest? It's hard to imagine recapturing what he had with Tommy with anybody else, or for the GA to embrace it as much as they did. What little we can see of the GA reaction (because the official socials are weirdly quiet and have not posted) is that they're not happy about this. Tim knows this.

I can buy Tim making some dumb writing decisions but he's not stupid. I find it very hard to swallow that he'd voluntarily toss away all this, and this potential, and what they'd already established, and a pairing/character/actor he loves, for what? For nothing.

So I think that it's not for nothing.

I think the plan IS to reunite them...

...they just don't know when, or how.

For some reason he wants to give it a break for awhile. I don't know why. There could be off-camera reasons. But I think it happened recently. Two weeks ago we got interviews talking about hurdles being overcome, relationships deepening, etc etc. It's a great episode for them, came out of Oliver's mouth. Not important, not consequential - great. And hey, what happened to that very important Bobby conversation where he gave Buck important advice? It wasn't there.

I think a change was made in the last two weeks. And yes, I know the loft stills were dated 9/17.

Two weeks is plenty of time to reshoot one scene, between when those interviews came out and last night. The stills could be from the first time it was shot, in September. Put the guys in the same wardrobe, we'd never know the difference, or that those stills weren't from the scene we actually saw.

The scene was always the one we saw, but was always meant to be temporary, and the change was in how they talked about it in the interviews from last night. That is a simpler explanation, as it doesn't involve reshoots, but it doesn't explain those very incongruous interviews we got two weeks ago that do not match the scene we saw. Now, they have always vagued it up, and talked around things in interviews, but this was an entirely new level of misdirection and outright lying that isn't typical.

I'm really tinhatting it up now, but hey, what have I got to lose? I'm not investing anything in this. It's just...a thought.

If you think the network interfered (I don't, at least not for plot-related reasons, see below) or Oliver demanded the relationship be cut (I don't - I know lots of you are mad at him but I'm not), whatever it was...I just get a vibe. It could be as simple as money. It could be a ratings thing. Honestly? It could be that they've found out they're getting cancelled, and were ordered to cut bait on guest stars. They could be kicking the can down the road to goose ratings for spring when they do bring it back. There are lots of reasons I can think of and probably more that I can't.

I read a thoughtful and reasonable post about how it was more or less a mercy killing to post those interviews - most showrunners like to keep viewers guessing and coming back, so for them to say definitely BT was dead meant it's really, really dead (although how definitive they actually were is another question).

They might be right about that. I don't know.

Or they just might not know themselves. Even if the plan IS to reunite them eventually - if they don't have a plan for how or when, the safest course is to shut it down. No guarantees they can make it work, so play it safe. Oliver and Lou might not be looped in on this.

It's pretty thin. They probably would be, although we have ample evidence of actors not knowing stuff until the last minute. The other option is that they are looped in and are intentionally lying but I think that's very unlikely - although Lou has demonstrated a keen skill in keeping his mouth shut when necessary.

I'm not going to get nuts about this and neither should anybody else. I'm not going to be scouring socials or the internet looking for support or clues. I'm not going to be holding my breath waiting for a sign.

The only thing I'll keep an eye on is how they handle any flirtation or dating Buck does in the near future. How they handle it might be telling.

This is ALL very unlikely, let's be real.

I'm still tinhatting, though. Why not? What have we got to lose?

But if I'm right, I expect that red dodgeball in my inbox toot sweet.

(And Buddie still isn't going canon, btw.)

#911 abc #911 speculation #911 spoilers #bucktommy #tevan #hope springs eternal #not for nothing but I accurately predicted that the Miceli's scene would be their first and it would be their 6 month anniversary

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lonepantheress · 1 year ago

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i really love you

☆ pairing: kim gyuvin x reader

☆ genre: angst mostly! rlly not as romantic as i hoped

☆ warnings: yunjin le sserafim cameo

☆ wc: 3.3k

☆ a/n: i feel like i owe 1000 apologies and then some. this is the first thing that i've written in awhile. i know i've been MIA but life has really been chaotic. still i wrote this a few weeks ago and decided just to post since i haven't. i miss this blog and the lovely messages i'd receive. i hope you all enjoy <3.

You were often told that people envied your friendship with Gyuvin. You hadn’t known each other your whole lives, but it definitely felt like it. In fact, you considered yourself lucky to have a connection that goes so far beyond the surface level.

The depth of your bond presented itself in a way you considered unique. It was incredible to have someone who knew everything about you – who wanted to know everything about you. He was your shoulder to cry on and the most reliable person that you knew. You often found yourself with the fleeting thought of What if we were more than just best friends? But you brushed it off before you even gave yourself the chance to entertain it.

Still, it was no question to the people around you that you and Gyuvin were something more than best friends – even without that “Boyfriend-Girlfriend” label.

Which is how you found yourself in this position: You and Yunjin found yourselves in the same boat of “I-haven’t-know-you-my-whole-life-but-I-definetly-feel-like-I-have,” meaning you frequently spent your time with one another, and on a weekly basis you slept over at her apartment and vice versa.

You’d watch movies and do skin care and braid hair, but above all you exchanged secrets. Over months and months of sleepovers you found out about Yunjin’s secret spelling mishap of 8th grade, and she found out about your high school boyfriend who liked to call you “Sugar Plum” unironically. No matter how serious or ridiculous the secret, they came out naturally in the dead of night during almost every sleepover the two of you would have.

“I think, maybe, deep down inside, I am possibly harboring some feelings for Gyuvin.” The confession came out with the same pit in your stomach you get when you’re throwing up.

You sat across from Yunjin on her apartment bedroom floor with green face masks adorning both of your faces. You couldn’t believe the words that had just left your mouth, your heart raced while you waited for Yunjin to give you some sort of response. When your eyes darted up at her, she looked at you wide-eyed and jaw-dropped.

The room seemed to hold its breath, almost as if it were waiting with you for Yunjin to say something. You were having one of those heart-to-hearts that you only have in the dead of night, admitting all kinds of secrets that you had to look deep inside to find. Still, upon hearing yours, she blinked a few times as if she was trying to process what she’d just heard.

“Wow,” she said softly, breaking the silence, “I mean, I already knew that! I just wasn’t expecting you to say it!”

You managed a weak smile in return, the corners of your lips shaking with nerves, “Yeah. Me neither.”

“Well? You haven’t said anything to him about it?”

“What? No! Oh god, no. That hurts my head just thinking about it, no. I can’t.”

“You can’t?”

“I can’t.”

She didn’t understand you, but she understood the weight of your words and decided not to bother you about it anymore. Yunjin reached over and gently put her hand over yours, the warmth of her touch grounded you in that moment. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. You know I’m here if you need anything, right?”

The confession occupied the air between the two of you like a fragile secret. Now, the green face masks seemed oddly out of place. As if the intimate exchange had transcended the triviality of their original purpose.

Yunjin’s initial shock gave way to a soft smile, her eyes holding a mixture of empathy and understanding. The kind of understanding that could only be offered by close friends – knowing they may not comprehend the depth of your emotions, they will be there for you nonetheless.

You sighed heavily and turned your gaze to the ceiling, letting all those emotions you shoved down take their place in your heart. “I don’t even know what I’m feeling half the time,” you admitted, voice carrying a mix of frustration and self deprecation.

Yunjin chuckled, her eyes crinkled in the corners and the dry mask of her face cracked in sync. “Babe, feelings are messy! I don’t think mine ever follow a logical path.”

“God, tell me about it. It’s just… Gyuvin, you know? We’re just too good as friends. What if I ruin it?”

Your hand received a reassuring squeeze from Yunjin before she withdrew her touch, a pensive expression on her face. She leaned back on her arms, considering your words carefully.

“I mean – I personally don’t get where you’re coming from,” she began, voice gentle, “But think about it this way Y/n: if your friendship is as good as you believe it is, then it’s strong enough to handle some turbulence. Emotions aren’t always predictable, and that’s okay! What if some weird unspoken tension affects your friendship more than your harboring some secret feelings?”

You sighed again, staring at the tiles at the ceiling as if they’d give you the answer after a while. “I know. You’re right. It’s just scary…I don’t even care if he feels the same way, what if things get weird between us?”

Yunjin leaned forward, resting her chin in her hands. “Babe, look, I can’t predict the future. I do know that honesty is the best policy, though. He deserves to know the truth, but you deserve to express your feelings even more! Whether he reciprocates or not, it’s not in your control. What you can control is how you handle this moving forward.”

“You’re right,” you admitted, letting your head down to face her. “I can’t even tell you how long I’ve been avoiding this for. It isn’t fair to either of us.”

Yunjin smiled widely at you, mask cracking more and more. “Exactly! And you know what they say about regrets, right?”

“What do they say?”

“Well.. I don’t really know. But they have to say something about it! Look, if he truly values your friendship then he’ll appreciate your honesty.”

You smiled back at Yunjin, your own mask cracking from the movement in your face. Yunjin stood up and held her hand out for you to grab.

You reached out and took her hand, letting her help you up from the ground. The air in the room felt a little lighter now, as if the weight of your confession had been shared and the burden lessened.

“Come on,” Yunjin said, “Let’s wash these off and then go to bed. We can talk about this in the morning or something. And if things don’t work, I will happily accept a confession from you on his behalf!”

Despite the impact that your much needed heart-to-heart with Yunjin had on you, you still found yourself unable to take any immediate action (or any action at all, for that matter.) In fact, it was more like the opposite. Your behavior took an unexpected turn – one that puzzled those around you. To you, though, it all made perfect sense. You had finally sat down and confronted those feelings that you had long harbored, and you need some time and space to really process it. Particularly, time and space away from Gyuvin.

You shifted to practically being inseparable from one another to being distant and withdrawn. Those who’d grown accustomed to seeing you two together nearly every day were now met with your fleeting glances and casual avoidance. It was you who’d placed the invisible barrier between you and Gyuvin, leaving him equally confused by your sudden change in behavior.

Though, he didn’t know what exactly caused this sudden shift with you, he wasn’t blind to the cues you were throwing his way. He noticed immediately your short responses (if he had received one at all), and your excuses to avoid making any plans. He saw you take the long way from one place to another and he could only assume it was so you could avoid crossing paths with him. And while the biggest part of him wanted to know why, his brain told him to just let you deal with whatever it was you were dealing with.

This went on for three weeks before someone decided to mention it.

“What’s going on with Y/n?”

“What’s going on with Y/n?” Gyuvin scoffed at Matthew’s question and deadpanned, “If I knew that, she’d probably be here right now.”

Matthew raised an eyebrow, “Man, don’t get mad at me. I’m just so used to seeing you guys together all the time. It’s weird to everyone to see you guys apart like this.” Matthew leaned against the table at the campus café that they both sat.

Gyuvin let out a sigh and ran his hand through his hair, “You’re telling me? I’ve tried talking to her but she’s just… distant? I dunno. I can’t put a finger on why.”

“Did you guys have a fight?”

He shook his head, face full of frustration. “Is it bad if I say I wish we did? At least then I’d know what I did. She’s just been acting different. We used to spend hours talking about the dumbest shit and now it’s like pulling teeth to even get a few words out of her.”

Matthew took a sip from his coffee, gaze fixed on Gyuvin, “Maybe she’s going through something! Sometimes people start acting like that when they’re going through something personally. It could be something heavy, and she’s just not ready to talk about it yet.”

Gyuvin frowned at that idea, his mind was racing considering Matthew’s words. What could be so bad that you wouldn’t tell him? “You think so?”

Matthew nodded.

“I mean.. I don’t know, man. We’re always there for each other. If that’s the case then I wish she’d just let me in.”

Matthew gave a wide, reassuring smile before replying, “Maybe she will, eventually. Just give her some time. Try not to let her push you away completely, keep reaching out. Even if it’s just a, ‘Hey. How’s your day?’ text or something.”

Gyuvin nodded, trying his best not to acknowledge the little pit in his stomach that was gnawing at him, “I’ll do that. But I get to blame you if your advice sucks.”

With the days passing, Gyuvin took Matthew’s advice to heart. He started sending you the occasional message asking about your day or giving you an anecdote out of his. He wasn’t expecting lengthy responses, but he wanted you to know that he was still there regardless of whatever it was you were dealing with.

You, on the other hand, were dealing with all kinds of complex sentiments about your situation. To no one’s surprise, honesty was a much easier concept to speak about than it was in practice. That confession to Yunjin that night had opened a floodgate of uncertainty and fear for you. Part of you had expected your feelings to be reciprocated or to at least be brushed aside as a passing thought, but the reality was much more complicated. You’d unintentionally thrown a wrench in your friendship with Gyuvin, and it was past the point of you knowing how you could fix it.

You spent a lot of time thinking about it, your situation. You stared at your messages with Gyuvin and wondered if they’d be any different if you were honest. When you’d see him on campus laughing with his friends, your heart would ring itself out. Your close friends could notice the toll that it was taking on you, especially Yunjin. She was the only one who knew anything about what you were feeling, so she was the only one who could try to help.

She noticed how your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes anymore, or the heavy sighs that seemed to escape you involuntarily, or the way that you’d space out and think to yourself more often.

One night, you were both sprawled across her living room couch with a movie playing in the background. The atmosphere was interrupted by the loud chime of your phone. It sat on the coffee table in the center and the screen was lit up with a text.

“Who’s that?”

You both knew who it was. “Oh, probably my mom or something. I’ll just reply later.” You could lie all you wanted, but you couldn’t pretend that your situation wasn’t getting to you. The message was short and sweet, but it made your stomach erupt with butterflies while simultaneously giving you the urge to throw up. Hi, I’m thinking of you. Just wanted to check in and ask you about your day.

“Y/n.” Yunjin spoke softly, but she sounded stern. She wanted you to take her seriously and to let your walls down again.

“Yunjin.” You responded, putting your phone back down and looking her in the eye.

“I can see how much this is bothering you. It’s eating you up inside, isn’t it?” She sat up and grabbed the remote from the coffee table, pausing the movie before facing you again. Neither of you need to clarify what “this,” was because the heavy toll it had taken on your heart was evident to anyone who knew about your feelings.

You couldn’t stop the tears before they began to fall. You could only nod in response, unable to put your feelings into words.

“Babe, I think it’s time to face this head-on,” Yunjin suggested, maintaining a firm but gentle tone. “You can’t avoid him forever. It’s hurting the both of you.”

“But what if it makes things worse?” You whispered, voice trembling.

“I really, really, really don’t think you’d do that,” Yunjin sighed and faced you directly. “He asked me about you the other day.”

That only made you cry harder, feeling like your heart would just explode in your chest. “What’d he say?” You managed to ask through sobs.

“You know, he just wanted to see how you were. If everything was okay with you.”

“And what’d you tell him?”

“I told him that I couldn’t really say. That you’ll make the time soon to go talk to him.”

“Yunjin…” you trailed off and broke your eye contact with her, feeling embarrassed. “I don’t know if I can do that.”

“I’m not saying it’s gonna be easy,” she began, “But, this distance? This awkwardness? It’s not doing you any favors. At least if you talk to him you’ll know where you stand.”

All you could do was nod before Yunjin brought you into a deep embrace, comforting you while you cried on her shoulder.

Over the next few days, you continued to wrestle with the decision of finally facing Gyuvin. The inner turmoil was beginning to reach its peak, you knew that you couldn’t keep pretending like he didn’t exist. Yunjin’s words echoed in your mind as a constant reminder to confront your feelings and put an end to the growing distance between you and Gyuvin.

One evening, as the sun began to set and cast a variety of golden hues over the city, you found yourself standing in front of Gyuvin’s favorite coffee shop. It was also your favorite, but you’d been avoiding it on the off chance that you’d see him there. Your heart raced as you took a deep breath, trying to summon the courage to go inside. The bell above the door tinkled as you entered, scanning the cozy interior until your gaze met Gyuvin.

He was sitting by the window, engrossed in whatever assignment he was working on, his brows furrowed in concentration. The sight of him sent a rush of emotions through you – familiarity, comfort, and a twinge of nervousness. You scolded yourself internally for being scared to talk to your best friend.

You approached his table, cringing at how loud your footsteps seemed to sound in the otherwise quiet café. He looked up, surprise registering on his face before morphing into a warm smile.

“Hi,” he greeted, closing the books that littered the table and setting them aside, “I wasn’t expecting to see you.”

“Hi,” you echoed, your voice a little shaky, “Is it okay if I sit with you?”

Gyuvin’s expression to a more confused one, but his smile never faltered. “Of course you can sit with me,” he gestured to the empty seat across from him, “I would actually really like it if you did.”

You settled into the seat, avoiding eye contact with him. The silence between the two of you hung for a moment before Gyuvin decided to speak up, “Is everything okay with you? I feel like I never hear from you lately.”

You took a deep breath, your heart still racing. “That’s actually why I came here. I was hoping you’d be here so that we could talk.”

His brows furrowed slightly and his expression dropped, concern evident in his eyes, “You can tell me anything. Please, talk to me.”

“I really love you Gyuvin.”

Gyuvin smiled earnestly at you, “I love you too. You know that you can tell me anything, right?”

You sighed and looked him in the eye before repeating yourself, “No, I mean, I love you.”

Gyuvin's eyes widened, and he seemed momentarily taken aback by your confession. He opened his mouth to say something but hesitated, as if choosing his words carefully.

You cut him off before he could speak, “I just – I sort of realized it one night and I couldn’t figure out how to face you? I didn’t know how, so I just didn’t. And I know it was wrong and I know I should’ve just been honest with you and I just….” you trailed off and looked for some sign of understanding in his eyes.

There was a passing moment of silence where your eye contact was never broken, but you could feel your heart drumming against your chest while the lights in the café began turning on to account for the lack of the sun.

“I love you too.”

Your eyes widened and you waited to respond out of fear that the butterflies in your stomach would fly out if you opened your mouth. “You love me?”

“I really love you,” he mimicked your earlier statement.

You laughed a bit and let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding, reaching a hand out to intertwine with Gyuvin’s. “I was so scared. That by telling you I’d ruin our friendship. That scared me more than anything.”

"Y/n, you have to understand that our friendship is incredibly precious to me, like a guiding light in my life. But you… you're more than that. And now, it's as if our bond is being woven even tighter, stronger, because we're entrusting each other with the most vulnerable parts of ourselves." Gyuvin's voice softened, his eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine. "It's a kind of feeling that I never want to lose."

You felt a sense of relief wash over you at his words, tears welling up in your eyes and rolling down your cheeks, “I should’ve talked to you sooner. I’m sorry, I really am.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said softly, wiping the tears from your cheeks with his free hand. “You’re here now. We’re here now and that’s what matters.”

You chuckled through your tears, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. “Yunjin was right, you know. She told me I needed to face this head-on.”

“I never thought I’d say this about her, but you have a pretty smart friend,” Gyuvin teased, his smile widening.

You both laughed, the tension in the air dissipating. It felt like a heavy fog had been lifted for the both of you, leaving a clarity that neither of you had seen before. The café seemed to fade into the background as you focused on each other.

“So…” you began, “What do we do now?”

Gyuvin leaned in a little closer, his eyes locked onto yours. “I think you owe me, at the very least, a date for what I had to put up with this past month.”

You nodded, stifling your giggles from him before responding, “I think I can make that happen.”

#zerobaseone x reader #zb1 x reader #zb1 imagines #zerobaseone #zerobaseone headcanons #zerobaseone scenarios #zerobaseone oneshot #zerobaseone angst #zb1 angst #zb1 fics #zerobaseone fics #kim gyuvin #gyuvin x reader #zb1 gyuvin #gyuvin imagines

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actiniumwrites · 1 year ago

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𝐒𝐎 𝐖𝐄 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐀𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓 [𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎]

synopsis: the reasons why your relationship with them didn’t last, or in other words, the reason why you broke up

characters: albedo, kaeya, mona, yelan, zhongli, baizhu, itto, cyno, kaveh, and dainsleif x gn!reader (separate)

warnings: pure angst, hurt/no comfort, breakups, death, betrayal, etc

notes: um so nobody asked for this, but i needed to write something since it’s been awhile between writing posts. i did really enjoy writing the first part a while back and a lot of people liked it too. anyway, i’ve been busy with some oneshots, so enjoy this for now <3

(part one)

albedo:

alchemy mattered more than you

he had promised when you first got together that you would be his priority, and deep down, you believed it

now you just felt foolish

his time never involved you because it was always alchemy this and alchemy that

he’d disappear for hours on end to dragonspine and not even tell you

or the times where he would constantly talk about alchemy, and no matter how many times you had tried to tell him, you just couldn’t understand

you couldn’t help but feel lonely despite being with him

gradually, it all built up to be far too much for you to burden anymore

so one day, you wrote him a letter and gathered your things. if albedo wasn’t going to make time for you, you weren’t going to waste your time on him anymore

kaeya:

he could never fully be himself around you

for years he had avoided relationships because of his secrets and his history with the ragnvindr family

but when he met you, he thought he could give it a chance

he loved you, truly he did, but he just couldn’t open up

everything he wanted to say was always at the back of his mind, feeding into the desire to just spill all of his trauma and live freely

there was just always this unknown force, desperately keeping him from letting it all out — a fear of rejection and a mechanism to protect himself

secrets and lies weren’t what you deserved, and kaeya knew that

eventually he just let the distance grow, and when it got to be enough, he let you go

each and every day he regrets it, but he knows he can’t go back

mona:

she saw too far into the future

long ago she told herself she wouldn’t do it, wouldn’t ask the stars about you

but greed and curiosity got to her, and to her shock, mona was terrified by what she saw

no, you weren’t going to cheat or do anything bad. what she saw was worse

death

you were going to die and mona knew she wasn’t strong enough to witness it, especially not if she was emotionally bound to you

the relationship was relatively new enough that she was able to lie, say it “wasn’t working out.”

of course, you didn’t know any better and didn’t fight her on it. you were confused, but if that’s what she wanted, you weren’t going to waste your time

and for years after, she avoided you and any news of you like the plague

until one day, a newspaper landed on her doorstep

“mondstadt local found dead in tragic dragonspine accident.”

yelan:

you weren’t who you said you were, and she found out the hard way

the two of you had been together for years

she had met you at a market in liyue one day, and the two of you clicked right of the bat

she loved you more than anything

well, up until you began getting more and more suspicious

coming back late, leaving at random times in the night while she slept, going on suspicious jobs, not telling her who you were meeting with

one day she trailed you without you knowing. it was then that she discovered you were a spy from another nation, and the entire relationship was a lie

instantly, she caught you and turned you over to the millileth in a heartbeat

no tears were shed on either side

you were dead to her

zhongli:

the age gap was too big

while you weren’t younger than his physical age, you were certainly mentally younger

naturally, you knew his true identity, but that didn’t stop you from wanting to be with him

though, over time, you noticed the things you once got along about didn’t matter

more and more disagreements and arguments occurred — far too many for either of you to handle

you didn’t understand him as much as you thought you did, and he inevitably felt the same about you

one day he sat you down and you talked for hours in an attempt to fix things

but in the end, the decision to break up was the only mutual decision you could come to

baizhu:

you couldn’t bear his obsession with immortality

there were countless times you had tried to talk him out of it, but baizhu was stubborn

what was going to happen if he truly did achieve immortality? where would that leave you?

you hated the idea of him staying young forever while you grew old

in your eyes, that relationship would never last

you ignored the issue for a long time. although it caused him health problems, you knew he wasn’t going to just die on you

you kept telling yourself everything was fine when, honestly, it was far from it

an argument broke out between the two of you during a particularly stressful week

insults were tossed back and forth, and soon enough he tossed aside your concerns again too

“i’ve had enough of you’re incessant complaining! can’t you see i don’t care?” baizhu said. he didn’t mean it, but in the heat of the moment, the words came out of his mouth before he could think

“fine! if that’s how it’s going to be, you won’t have to worry about my ‘complaining’ anymore. i’m leaving. maybe one day you’ll see that you’re only hurting more people than helping them.”

itto:

he took you for granted

his personality was one of the first things you fell for when you met him

his warm and boisterous laugh, never ending jokes, childlike excitement

it was one that was unique to only him and rare to find amongst the rest of inazuma; people you considered to be far too serious

although, his personality proved to be a problem as time passed

arguments were never taken seriously, he couldn’t read the room, and you hated the way he couldn’t seem to value you as much as the gang mattered to him

and as aformentioned, itto struggled to take serious situations well…seriously

he brushed you off when you told him it didn’t feel like you were even dating, that you just felt like his best friend

and when nothing changed time and time again, you left

shinobu helped you pack your things with a pained expression on her face, for even she knew you had deserved better

cyno:

his work got in the way of things

cyno and you had a really great relationship with each other from the get-go

as stupid as they were, you loved his jokes. you loved how caring he was, even if it wasn’t always obvious. you loved his dedication and commitment to everything and everyone.

and he loved you equally as much, if not more

being the general mahamatra was not easy, however

he was constantly away at work and didn’t have a lot of time to spend with you

of course, he loved it when he could, but it wasn’t often, and that was hard on both of you

in the end, you both mutually decided to end things. it would be better to end things on a positive note than on a bitter one with hurt feelings, you decided, and he agreed

kaveh:

both of you were in different places in life

kaveh had a lot of leftover feelings to deal with from his early life, alongside his insane amount of debt and lack of stability in his life

you were still finding yourself, working toward your passions and always pushing upward

the relationship between you was one that had lasted for years. it felt like you had seen it all together.

but as you got older, things began to fall apart. you supported kaveh and he supported you, but neither of you were sure that a romantic relationship was something you could uphold at this point

there were no arguments or sour feelings at the end, just a bittersweet taste you both couldn’t shake

perhaps you could find each other again some day

dainsleif:

he couldn’t bear to involve you in his life

not in the sense that he didn’t want you in it, but because he struggled so much on a day to day basis with his curse and eternal karma

he didn’t want you to suffer too, or to feel like you were suffering from a relationship with him

not only that, but he was immortal and you were not

no matter what, things were never going to work out in his favor

to be honest, you weren’t even officially together

the lasting glances were there, sped up heartbeats around one another, a feeling of home too, but dainsleif knew it wouldn’t last

he could trick himself into believing he could have you all he wanted, but in there was no ending that let you be together

in the middle of the night one night, he got up from where he laid next to you and found the letter he had stored. the letter that detailed his pain and regret over having to end things, but the inevitability of it all

he placed it neatly on the side table next to the bed and kissed your forehead one last time

if there was any chance in the future he could return he would, but for now, dainsleif knew you were better off without him

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twistedwonderlandimaginesblog · 5 months ago

Text

(Saw someone do this and decided it seemed fun~

link to my ao3 here)

How many works do you have on AO3?

85.

What's your total AO3 word count?

915,568 words~

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently it’s for Helios Rising Heroes, Hypnosis Mic, Obey Me, Paradox Live, and Twisted Wonderland!

I’ve previously written for A3!, Ace Attorney, Ace of Diamond, Borderlands, Bungou Stray Dogs, Free!, Fire Emblem Three Houses, Fire Force, Gorillaz, Hero Academia, Kuroko no Basuke, Magi, Naruto, Red Dead Redemption, Run with the Wind, RWBY, Shokugeki no Souma, Stardew Valley, Tokyo Ghoul

Top five fics by kudos?

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes [Twisted Wonderland] – 6,298

We’d Be a Hit Together [Haikyuu!!] – 6,211

Super Powered Love [My Hero Academia] – 5,436

A Devil’s Bride [Obey Me!] – 3,583

I Need Love [Hypnosis Mic] – 1,928

Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I always read and appreciate comments made on my posts, on AO3 and Tumblr, I always check to see if someone has tagged it with commentary <3

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

To be fair I hurt Malleus with the whole ‘you’re likely someone with a shorter lifespan’ idea constantly, but The Brightest Star was definitely a sadder one from my KNB days.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of them because I truly hate unhappy endings. You can probably tell just from how I write that I try to put a positive spin on things, but I am trying to just let the angst happen or leave things off with ambiguity rather than specifying that a character only seems to feel a certain way when they’re actually feeling something else entirely.

Do you get hate on fics?

Occasionally. I remember getting this angry message about me being a feminist because I made the reader like dom Hanamiya from KNB and they were MAAAAD about it lmao I also remember being on fanfic dot net and getting argued with and I just sent the brady bunch theme song over and over until they stopped messaging me back

Do you write smut?

I do! Not the biggest fan of it honestly because I never feel like it’s half as sexy as the things I read other people write, but I do get in moods and with certain characters they just need to be manhandled a lil, you know?

Craziest crossover?

I have never written a crossover in my LIFE

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Awhile back I did but I was told about it and the story was quickly taken down, I think it was on Wattpad or something like that.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! I’ve gotten a handful of requests for my more popular ones to get translated, I don’t mind at all!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I mean I’m co-writing a book with the other admin on this blog, so does that count?

All time favorite ship?

Me and all my lil husbands.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was writing this Criminal Minds fanfic that I had all plotted out, dramatic quotes at the beginning of episodes already picked, but I don’t think I’ll ever bother focusing on it.

What are your writing strengths?

I would say characterization is my strength! The characters are the best parts of fanfics after all and I always try to do research on the characters I write; if they’re ones I don’t know as well I’ll scan the wiki and read extra stories with them in it just to get a better handle on them! It’s why when there’s characters that haven’t been around long enough or don’t have a lot of content translated for them that I don’t like writing for them because I need at least something to go off of, I don’t want to have to make up their personality myself

What are your writing weaknesses?

Details. Which is a horrible thing to say as a writer, but I do feel like my writing lacks details here and there. Like with dialogue, I’ve been trying to write more in-between actions while the characters are talking since most people aren’t just standing still, especially if a character was doing something before another person entered the room. Descriptions of the world around the characters

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I don’t like using google translate but I do have characters I love who speak other languages. Those heinous Hetalia days where you’d randomly put a word into the middle of an otherwise english sentence… they haunt me. But what I try to do with Citron from A3 is write some of his dialogue in parentheses to show he’s speaking in a language that the reader might not understand, and I feel like that works a little better for someone who doesn’t speak anything but english to do for the sake of not butchering another language.

First fandom you wrote in?

I truly wish I knew. I know I wrote for Naruto back in the day, and The Outsiders was one of the first full length fics I did. But that was back on Quizilla which has since turned to dust. I was also on Lunaescence for a while, whose creators have also turned to dust apparently. What a world

Favourite fic you've written?

It’s hard to pic just one when most of my fics are like, stand-alone short little things. But I think one I’m very fond of (which was written for the other admin so it explains why I put so much effort into it) was Snowy Mountain Getaway, which was a FE3H Dimitri/Reader College AU fic.

#Admin Chatter

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woozten-x · 1 year ago

Text

#. 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐧𝐢𝐚 || 𝐉𝐚𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧

[ ; M.List including other Neos! ]

─ Synopsis: Insomniac nights are a pain...But, Na Jaemin will be the end of it all.

─ CONTENT WARNING: Indirect mention of suicide, DEPRESSION!

─ Pairing: Na Jaemin x Gender-Neutral Reader

─ Genre: Angst w. Comfort, Fluff/Wholesome

─ Concepts: reader has insomnia and depression, indirect statement towards suicide(?), basically reader getting comforted by reader because everyone needs a Jaemin in their lives, crappy writing pls don't mind that LOL

─ Count of Words: 1.2k

─ Inspiration of the work: What Was I Made For? - Billie Ellish

A/N: hi again LMAOODHSD yeah its been awhile. uhh... well... ive been burnt out for awhile because for some reason sitting and writing was a really difficult task to do lately. i am working on other projects! but, finishing them is a different story. this isn't how i wanted to come back... but, things been rough so i've been in the gutter and just wrote this on a whim since writing is just my source of comfort.

this is incredibly self indulgent. its a little too real? idk. the emotions are there but its not exactly clarified further? i decided to post so i can just put something up before doing changes to my acc + have some comfort for people who dealt with similar issues (stay strong<3). i am not sure what else to really say HAHAHDGS but, i will be writing and putting some things up again!!

ty for anyone who followed and continued supporting my works. i really appreciate it<3 i hope you guys have a great day/night :)

Another sleepless night.

At this point, it should be part of your routine, but it has gotten to the point where you are staring at your ceiling in the dark. Endless thoughts struck your mind like thunder, each droplet of your breath seems repetitive; you are still breathing yet somehow everything feels so empty. You are not sure why you feel this way or maybe you do, it is simply one of those feelings you feel at times.

Because of these same feelings, you are left wide awake with your body begging to sleep but your mind is continuing to howl within the night; yet there is no moon. Somehow, everything feels so dark. During these late hours where everyone is sleeping, nightfall seems endless for you - finding no peace within, especially amongst your inner turmoil.

You glance at your bedside, reaching out to take your phone and check the time. The white, bold number glows back at you - ‘2:00 a.m.’ reflecting back at you and momentarily blinding you with its powerful light. You let out a heavy sigh, placing down your phone on the nightstand with eyes stinging slightly from exhaustion and possibly the bright light of your phone. Rising from your bed, you quietly open the door.

Your footstep croaks upon the wooden floor of your apartment, walking to the kitchen that was only down the hallway; thinking maybe you could find something to munch on. Knowingly, you would only go to the kitchen without much reason or an appetite. It was a distraction, one that could help you out of your thoughts; even for a brief moment.

Quietly you stalk towards the kitchen, the tile floor cold against your skin, you pay no mind however. Your hand extends towards the fridge, opening it and letting the light be the only thing illuminating back at you. Eyes scan the items inside the fridge, finding nothing appetizing nor did you bother to move to grab something; instead you stand in front of the fridge, the coldness escaping wraps around you.

It wasn’t comfortable. No, it was far from comfortable…Yet it was somehow comforting to feel it.

“Y/N?”

Blinking away the daze cursing you in place, you glanced over your shoulder to see Na Jaemin; your roommate and a friend since highschool. The two of you have quite a history, in fact he is one of your best friends, one who experienced the highs and lows with you. He seems confused upon seeing you at this hour, concern evident in his gaze but he conceals it with his usual smile of his.

One that seems to hold no worries.

“Can’t sleep?” He asks, walking over to you and you look away once hearing the beeping from the refrigerator. It was alerting the both of you about how the door was open a bit too long. You close it and Jaemin grunts when he bumps into the corner of the counter within the kitchen, “What are you doing in the dark? You got night vision?” He grumbles, a hint of pain in his teasing.

You chuckle, walking towards the light switch of the kitchen and pressing the button - “Maybe I do~ Maybe I am a vampire.”

“Is that why you are always sleeping during the day?” Jaemin jokes along, the same smile playing on his lips. The light of the kitchen glowing in a faint yellow, your eyes easily landing on Jaemin; although he carries a smile, it did not reach his eyes. “Are you okay?” He asks, inquiring about your well-being once more; he seems to care so much.

But, for what reason? Your mind instantly thinks that when just seeing it. Feeling it.

You shrug, “No idea. Just have…A lot of thoughts.” You admittedly say, not exactly direct with what you were feeling. No words could describe it; was it exhaustion? Sadness? No, for some reason, it was more complicated than that.

Jaemin eyes at you, tilting his head - “What kind of thoughts?”

“When will the world end?” You joke with a small, half-hearted laugh. Jaemin rolls his eyes, your playfulness seizing an opportunity; but, it wasn’t exactly worth it. No joy overwrites the concern on Jaemin’s handsome face.

“Do you want the world to end?” He asks, leaning himself against the edge of the counter. You stood near the fridge, feeling your shoulders shrug at his question; it was a joke, nothing more. However, Jaemin had caught on the deeper undertone of it.

You sigh, “Honestly, I don’t know. It’s not like Doom would appear at my service.”

“Yes, dating some type of godly being is out of the question.” Jaemin chuckles, nodding at your words. You feel your lips tug up into a small smile at the same banter, your eyes falling away from his; your eyes scanning the tile floor, each line of the floor somehow more interesting than the person facing you.

“I wouldn’t want it to end.” He said, shrugging his shoulders and you scoff at his words. You part your lips to speak, but he continues - “But, if it ever ended, I would want to spend the very last moment with you.”

You chuckle, not exactly surprised to hear that from him. He’s always been vocal about his loyalty towards you and even his fondness; but, somehow it has your eyes watering just a little. It was such a small thing, one thing that seemed like a Na Jaemin thing to say yet it held so much impact. You look up, blinking away the tears with a laugh leaving you - “You are so cheesy.”

Jaemin shrugs, “I prefer speaking the truth.” He softly said, noticing the vulnerability surrounding you. Even when you hide it, he is always going to notice. He lifts himself off the counter, walking towards you. Strong arms surround you, tugging you close against a warmth; one that seems familiar, but one you seemed to have forgotten.

You rest your head against his chest, hearing the faint heartbeat of Jaemin. He places a hand on the back of your head, cradling you in his secure grasp - “It’s alright now.”

Burying your face in his chest, tears streaming down your face; the same tears that never came for these past nights. No matter how hard you tried, they wouldn’t fall. Finally, the warmth streams down your cheeks, letting all the heaviness drown you; you hold onto Jaemin, fingers loosely grasping onto his sweater, as he lets out a low assuring hum.

Even when you know he would never understand, he is going to stand in front of you with open arms. He always will.

“I won’t leave you alone for the night, okay?” He murmurs near your ear, his breath warm against your skin.

You nod, your grasp tightening on his sweater. By the end of the night, you won’t be able to let him go…

Even with these past nights of anxiety and overthinking, you are finally falling asleep in peace.

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jxmis · 1 year ago

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Wish You Were Sober

Pairings: Rosé Park x Fem!Reader

Summary: You and Roseanne Park have been best-friends for years now. Having finished wrapping up your show before blackpink's last performance at Coachella, you decide to show your support and fly out to LA and watch them. But maybe that wasn't such a good idea. Not after the events that had happened after the afterparty. Everything has changed. (sorry i suck at doing summaries)

Warning(s): angst

A/N: a lil inspiration by Wish You Were Sober by Conan Gray. Soooo I'm having major pcd after seeing BP last saturday soo decided to write for my bias wrecker. I literally just thought and wrote of this a few hours ago. Same with the picture T_T. I also have been writing jennie, lisa, and chaewon fics. Posting whichever I get done first after this one! Enjoy! :)

Rosanne Park isn't usually one to party hard. She isn’t the usual person to get wasted either. It's rare for that to happen.

But as they wrapped up their final night headlining Coachella, a party was thrown for their successful two shows. Being the first k-pop act and girl group to headline, making history! Of course, she had to live it up.

However, one shot became two, three, and even taking a couple sips of margarita. Those who are close to Rosé know that she doesn't have a high tolerance when it comes to alcohol. She's a lightweight.

You being a lot more responsible and smart, only took a few sips of your alcoholic beverage. You handle your liquor pretty well.

You see Rosé's manager trying to talk some sense into her but it seems as Rosé is being stubborn. You sigh, you approach them. Jane looks at you with a pleading look, you nod and gesture for her to go. She silently thanks you, softly patting Rosé's cheek before leaving.

"C'mon, Chae, you've had too much to drink." You carefully and softly put hand behind her back. Rosé shakes her head in protest.

"Y/N/NNN!!! Nooooo 'm havin sooo much funn!" She slurs. She leans against your shoulder, resting her head on it. She looks at you a smile bright on her face, bringing the glass close to you. "Have some! It's sooo good!" You take the beverage away from her hand causing her to pout.

"We're leaving, Chae. You've had your fun. Time for you to rest." Despite her protest, you drag her out of the party. She eventually quits whining and resisting. She sulks instead. "You'll thank me in the morning for this." You offer her support which she gladly takes as she's walking. She's so drunk to the point that she can't even walk straight.

You thankfully arrive back to Rosé's place safely. You did your very best to cover up Chae from the horde of paparazzies as you leave the party. Your bodyguard and Rosé's, as well as her manager using flashlights to ruin their photos.

--------

You look after Rosé. Even when the aftereffects of drinking so much alcohol led her to throw up. You help sooth her by holding her hair and caressing her back. Letting her know you're there and not going anywhere. As soon as you saw her hand on her stomach and a grimace on her face, you knew. You’re quite thankful you were able to get her to her room and rush her into the bathroom.

"It's okay, Chae. I've got you," you say softly. A minute goes by after Rosé seem to have let it all out. You clean up her face and begin her night time routine. You've slept over a good amount of times to have memorized it all. You help her brush her teeth and awkwardly had to help her change into pajamas. It wasn't easy doing that second part with your eyes close. But to your surprise, she was very compliant.

You are so focus on helping her, making sure she's okay that you didn't notice how quiet she's been. "Hey.. you okay?" You say as she settles on her bed. That's when it hit Rosé. Tears starts to pour down her eyes. You panic. You forgot how emotional she gets after everything when she gets drunk. It's been awhile since you've done this. You quickly sit next to her. "What wrong? Don't cry, Chae. It's okay! You're safe."

She sits up and clings onto you. You wrap your arms around her, rubbing her back. First, she repeatedly apologizes. "Thank you for always being there for me and taking care of me, Y/N/N." She says in a hush tone still clinging tightly onto you.

Even though she can't see you, you smile. "Don't apologize, you did nothing wrong. You were just having fun and you deserve to have fun. You know I'll always be here when you're in need." You pull away, bringing your hands on her cheeks, wiping her tears away. "Even if it's having to watch you throw up and clean you up after." You both laugh at that. You smile triumphally at your success on making her laugh.

You move a strand of hair out of her face. Wiping the tears that still remain on her cheeks. Meanwhile, Rosé's eyes remain on you. You notice. The mood suddenly changes in the room. The way Rosé is looking at you... it's different than usual. Maybe you've seen it once in a while whenever you two hung out before. But you always thought you were being delusional. A look that holds so much feelings, unspoken ones.

You see her mouth move but nothing comes out. She closes it and suddenly you see her eyes move to your lips. It catches you off guard. Trying to take it all in, you then feel her lips touching yours. It takes you a minute to process everything. Coming to your senses, you quickly pull away. Rosé opens her eyes. She can see the shock and confusion on your face.

"Chae... what are you.. what are you doing?"

She swallows the lump on her throat. What is she doing? It felt right though. "I- I don't- I don't know." Rosé manages to stutter out, trying to keep her tears at bay. "I just- I thought- Oh god, I'm so sorry." She covers her mouth, surprise with her actions as well.

You get up from her bed and run your hands through your hair. A million thoughts going through your head. Rosé watches you just standing there, stressed out. Now, she's really full on crying. What had she done? She ruined everything. You let out a deep sigh, "Its okay.. it's okay, you're drunk. Under the influence. It was the alcohol in you. Just- Just get some rest, Chae." You hesitantly approach her and kiss her head. "Good night."

"I like you!" Rosé calls out as you're heading towards the door. You freeze. "I like you so much, Y/N. For so long now. The alcohol coursing through my veins just gave me the courage to finally do something about it. So, please stay." She begs.

Silence fills the room after Rosé's confession. There's no way all this time, Roseanne Park, your best-friend has had a crush on you. You sure would've notice if she did... right? She'd never showed any signs that she had romantic feelings for you. You know her like the back of your hand! This is all because she's under the influence. That's all. She's just saying crazy things.

Without looking back, You bow your head down. "That's real sweet, but I wish you were sober," you whisper out. With that, you leave the sobbing blonde's room, silently hoping she heard you. Maybe even remember all of this in the morning. You doubt it.

"But I really do," Rosé says softly, the tone of her voice so sincere... fragile.

#rosé park x reader #park chaeyoung x reader #blackpink #blackpink rose #roseanne park #blackpink roseanne #rose park #park chaeyoung #blackpink fic #rose blackpink

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paraliveimaginesblog · 5 months ago

Text

(Saw someone do this and decided it seemed fun~ also posted to my TWST blog

link to my ao3 here)

How many works do you have on AO3?

85.

What's your total AO3 word count?

915,568 words~

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently it’s for Helios Rising Heroes, Hypnosis Mic, Obey Me, Paradox Live, and Twisted Wonderland!

Top five fics by kudos?

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes [Twisted Wonderland] – 6,298

We’d Be a Hit Together [Haikyuu!!] – 6,211

Super Powered Love [My Hero Academia] – 5,436

A Devil’s Bride [Obey Me!] – 3,583

I Need Love [Hypnosis Mic] – 1,928

Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I always read and appreciate comments made on my posts, on AO3 and Tumblr, I always check to see if someone has tagged it with commentary <3

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

To be fair I hurt Malleus with the whole ‘you’re likely someone with a shorter lifespan’ idea constantly, but The Brightest Star was definitely a sadder one from my KNB days.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Do you get hate on fics?

Do you write smut?

Craziest crossover?

I have never written a crossover in my LIFE

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Awhile back I did but I was told about it and the story was quickly taken down, I think it was on Wattpad or something like that.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! I’ve gotten a handful of requests for my more popular ones to get translated, I don’t mind at all!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I mean I’m co-writing a book with the other admin on this blog, so does that count?

All time favorite ship?

Me and all my lil husbands.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was writing this Criminal Minds fanfic that I had all plotted out, dramatic quotes at the beginning of episodes already picked, but I don’t think I’ll ever bother focusing on it.

What are your writing strengths?

What are your writing weaknesses?

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

First fandom you wrote in?

Favourite fic you've written?

#Admin Chatter

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sarah-sandwich · 9 months ago

Text

20 Questions (for fanfic writers)

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

1,280,212 lol

3. what fandoms do you write for?

presently? Just spider-man ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

4. top five fics by kudos:

Paradise (spread out with a butter knife) - spideypool 72k - soulmates au that's actually about the power of friendship

Don't Freak Out - parkner 136k - the one where they get kidnapped and spidey saves the day in the first chapter then they spend the rest of the fic falling in love

A Peach Like You - parkner 73k - sequel to a 16k coming of age one-shot in Harley's POV. This one is Peter's POV and he's autistic, overworked, and overwhelmed and this is the very worst time ever for falling in love so he's absolutely not going to do that... on purpose.

The Distance Between (You and Me) - parkner 29k - bodyguard au! Harley was kidnapped and rescued but his kidnappers are still out there so Tony begs an old friend to keep an eye on him until Natasha hunts them down.

You're Freaking Out - parkner 166k - sequel to Don't Freak Out this time with Plot! and Miles!!!

5. do you respond to comments?

Sometimes? I've gotten really bad about it :( After an update/new fic I try to get all the comments that come in over a week or so... but then I retreat into my cave and giggle and squee over them in private.

6. what is the fic your wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm I don't really do angst and especially not endings... but maybe The Devil is a Hopeless Romantic? I wouldn't call it an angsty ending though. Maybe bittersweet? Idk it's been awhile since I've read it. Not my favorite tbh

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Happy endings are my bread and butter lol The happiest? Uhhh

Lemme just plug For the First Time, Eye to Eye because it's one of my all time favs and hasn't come up yet.

8. do you get hate on fics?

nope!

9. do you write smut?

yep! Baseball Smut ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ yeah that's the title just posted this morning!

10. craziest crossover:

I haven't written a crossover since I was writing for spn and none of them ever made it out of my wips folder lol I had spn crossovers with Firefly, Teen Wolf, The 100, Criminal Minds, and (naturally) The Hunger Games. Man, I miss that. Such a versatile show.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of!

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

YES! biggest compliment so cool

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope! Done some brainstorming a time or two but just for fun. idk that I could collaborate that well what with my disappearing into the abyss habit...

14. all time favorite ship?

I mean parkner's got the longevity doesn't it? Dean and Cas will always have a special place with me though

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My time travel time loop parkner fic le siighh

16. what are your writing strengths?

Hmm I think overall voice (not just dialogue but internal narrative too) and breathing fresh air into old tropes.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Action scenes. My god they take forever to think of a way to do them that isn't tired and boring. And then I still have to write it.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

adds enrichment in my enclosure

19. first fandom you wrote in?

20. favorite fic you've written?

oof umm probably Peaches Ain't Pretty (the alluded to 16k Harley POV coming of age one-shot). Taught me I could write outside of fanfic if I wanted. It's actually the foundational inspiration that lead to Red, like my bleeding heart in your hand. Opened up the whole beach (if I'm brave enough to leave the sandbox). Anyway it's got a special spot in my heart. I'm probably due for a re-read tbh.

Thanks for tagging me @spoofymcgee!

no pressure tagging: @jammerific @wyxan @myarmsaretoolong @fieldsofview

#tag games #parkner #spideypool #<-my one hit wonder lol

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underscar · 2 years ago

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ONE MOMENT IN TIME

Pairing: Angel Devil/Female Reader

Summary: Winds fierce enough to burn a dragon in a pinch blasted the skies, the land, the ocean, and the mighty mountains. Dreamily the sky twinkled and winked, and had absorbed your lost, confused gaze. Your first memory in this life was this mountain, a mountain full of plant life and animal life all around you. How did you find yourself here? You constantly wondered. As you silently watched creatures, both plants and animals, survive and then die, time blurred. There was something fascinating about the cycle of life. Until one day, a distance away, you spotted a coastal village. You were concerned about what might happen if you were to wander away from the mountain that has been your home. Till a lost angel appeared.

CHAINSAW MAN MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

A/N: it's been awhile since i posted on here, been busy with exams and work. i just haven’t had time to finish things.

I started this oneshot almost half a year ago on ao3 and have finally finished it. i wrote it in a vauge way and realized this after a finishing it. hopefully you can still enjoy it.

WORD COUNT // 4991 words

WARNINGS: Implied Death, Angst, CSM Spoliers (?)

CSM TAGLIST: N/A

As fierce as a dragon in a pinch, the winds of the sky and land consecrated the atmosphere and ground, braiding itself between the ocean waves and mountain peaks. Dreamingly, the sky twinkled and winked at you absentmindedly. In turn, absorbing your lost and disoriented gaze. You found yourself in a place familiar but unknown. In a world old but renewed. Each intrinsic act of nature caused your tender and youthful skin to tremble.

A continuous hum of the breeze, it whips past you, making your naked skin frigid.

Standing bare and naked in a field of lush nature, you marveled at the enchanting view of the scene from atop the garden-coated cliff. The sight was simple and clean. You were not prone to humiliation, and your naked form demonstrated that. Shame was something you had yet experienced or know. This serene mountain and its tranquil sights were the very first remembrances you underwent in this lifetime. A mountain brimming with sustaining vitality and illustrative animal life.

The only thing you could do was gape in awe. Watching as the animal, which was equipped with teeth, wings, and more, devoured the plants and creatures. The sights appeared to be familiar to you. Being able to observe the plants almost passively allowing themselves to be eaten, together with the helpless prey that sought safety from the predators, was strange. They were so helpless in the face of predators.

You noticed these things.

As the days turned into weeks and those into months, you were on your hurried expedition with your lonesome. The phantom mountain was surrounded by eerie insects that were unfamiliar to your vivid mind, and they attached themselves to you. Each time it did so, it bit you, showing you through its actions how you had no place in the outside world. That your kind was neither desired nor wanted. Your manifestation was not asked for, but rather despised, as you are born from the dread of time.

How did you find yourself here, you wondered.

Time was a blur as you silently observed creatures, plants, and animals alike, all surviving then dying. Just to watch the cycle repeat, you bore witness. After living this cycle for who knows how long, a twitch of bravery swept over you, and you ventured further afield from your comfort zone. With a blanket of moss wrapped around your dirt-covered body, you explored the new arena.

On this venture of bravery and wonder, you encounter new plants and new animals. Increasingly, an ecosystem is reimagined in a brand-new way in today's world. It amazed you how places so diverse could all be stationed in the same place. Many of the animals here were friendly to you. They were prey and had no fear of the passing of time.

One creature small in stature stood out to you.

A creature as white as snow, and ears that reached the heavens, yet the size of a hefty potato.

Groups of the creatures ran through the stunted grass, and around your bare, cut up feet. One of these fluffy animals stood out to you. So much so that you ended up naming her for the first time. A name and time you found beautiful and pretty, Day. She found a liking to you after you gave it the orange stick it was having trouble pulling out of the ground. She often rested on your shoulder and chest, soft fur cuddling you as the moonlight lured you both to rest.

Animals were innocent. They prayed on instinct, with no free will. They could do no wrong. Just like you. You enjoyed the rabbits company in this lone abandoned world, but your childhood wonder never faltered. Your tongue craved the taste of a meal. Though, you didn’t eat. Never have you. You feared it. You didn’t know why though.

Additionally, it was beyond your primary concern.

To pass the time, you watched and followed the wild rabbit on its adventures in survival. In the beginning, before you met the wild animal, you never really spoke, until you came across another like yourself.

One day, a distance away, you spotted a coastal village, a community that looked quite different to you. Your curiosity warmed your body and intoxicated your mind, and you craved to explore and understand. Your time here was nearly impossible to put into words. You guess you could say it was enjoyable, you had Day after all. However, in truth, you were fearful of what could happen in time…if you were to wander in a place unknown to you; a species forgotten in your memory. Days after your discovery, you pondered on your next choice.

The stress overcame you, and before giving up on your curiosity to explore another arena, a lost angel emerged from a cave behind a small waterfall.

You could still see him however.

Silently, you made eye contact with his light eyes. He stared back at you from across the pond where you stood in your glory, a slothful rabbit on your shoulder. Without a hitch, you dropped yourself into the pond and swam to the hidden cave behind the puddling waterfall.

The water was cold upon impact. Dirt was erased from your body and face as you swam the short distance, holding your rabbit above water, acting as a lift of sorts. Your spirial eyes however never left the angel, and he didn't run away for some reason. The twirls of hoops that stood as your irises were enticing. Your eyes stared at each other curiously. Being by yourself for so long, and never seeing anything like yourself, left you needy for thr interaction.

Water dripped down your body as you made it to land. You first placed Day on the ground gently, and she began to shake off the water. In front of you was a male with shaggy hair resting on his dainty shoulders. He was pale beyond belief. You assumed he didn't leave the dark cave very often.

You gulp. Your mouth was dry as he stared at your figure and you absorbed his facial features. His back was against the wall he sat against. You stood near the cave entrance still, water dripping down to your feet. You slowly approached him; he exhaled sharply as you did.

You stop in front of him. He flinches.

You crouch down a few feet away from him. Your rabbit waddled its way towards you, done with its exploration of the cave, and began cuddling against you.

Your eyes crinkle as you smile.

You rubbed their fluffy ears as you thought of what to say. In order to introduce yourself to the lost angel, you had named yourself after the beloved friend that you adore.

“Call me _____. It’s a pretty name, isn’t it?” Your words echoed throughout the cave and around it. Angel did not blink, he did not breathe. Your presence made him feel as if the entire world was stuck in time.

His stomach curled up as your gaze pierced through it, and his mouth dried up.

He licked his lips and began to speak as you silently waited for any movement of his. “I suppose…I’m Angel,” he said, hesitantly.

You didn’t say anything. Then you got up again, picking up your friend, Day, as you did so, and got back to your feet. Trying to grasp the meaning of this encounter, your eyes danced around the dark cave. The angel remained on the ground as you observed the cave he had claimed.

He stared at your lips which began to move.

"Ah, Angel," you whisper.

You give the name time to settle on your tongue. “I wonder...how we found ourselves here?” you faltered. Your eyes wandered the dark cave interior, as if the answer to your curiosity was among the walls. You were connected to Angel in a diabolical manner that you couldn't explain.

The halo above his head seemed to shimmer as he whispered, "…I wonder that too, ______.”

You were both as old as time.

Two wisdoms comparable to one child.

Morning days were young and with the sun being shy to emerge itself from the clear, pastel sea, where the waves were gentle and shallow, so were the evenings.

It has been months since you found yourself in this wilderness. Therefore, as this current moment of time consumed your inquisitiveness with each ticking second, the vagueness of the past gradually lost its relevance to you. Instead, you’ve grown a passion for the present.

The pebbles beneath your head and back were just as frigid as the river water you were submerging your feet in as you peered up at the evening sky. Day, your close companion, slept soundly on your tummy, snoring peacefully with rest. The miles-long cloud cover in the sky prevented you from blinking, but as soon as you did, you were able to watch the clouds gently, apparently floating away toward whatever land that was afar.

“Ah, Angel?” you called out for him. Your voice was one with the breeze and as calm as. “Day or night?”

Angel was a distance away from you, underneath a tree that stood close by the river. Under it, hidden from view, he was crouched on the grass. Because of this, you carefully listened to what he had to say with the lack of visuals. “Um…I would suppose night as it’s a world full of darkness, and that darkness is rather…evocative.”

You rolled onto your stomach, causing Day to scramble off of you, and faced him. The wet grass rubbed against your skin sloppily, frigid mud smearing on your skin, but you didn’t mind. “A world…full of darkness?” you questioned.

Your eyes; Angel couldn’t look in your eyes. Not with those rings that spiralled In obscure angles, if he stared long enough he would’ve thought your irises twisted ovally, like a Ferris wheel, ticking counter-clock wise like a hour hand would. You absorbed him in a moment of time, merely with your engrossment.

Angel’s exhaled shakily as he turned away. “….Yes. My memories…are sheltered within that—darkness. It’s all I remember from my past. Why…do you ask?” he pondered.

Day crawled themselves underneath your laying form, cuddling your chest and absorbing your heat. You appease the rabbit as you scratched it in the spot it liked.

“Hearing you speak is all I wanted, Angel.”

Days had passed since he last talked, and it had been weeks since you came across him. The majority of the time, your traveling companion was only accompanying you and following you because he felt fascinated by you and compelled to do so. The impulse to follow along when one encounters an adventurer who seems unrestricted.

“And what is your preference, ______?” Angel asked.

You quirked a brow. “Day or night?

He nodded.

The sunlight was disappearing by the seconds and each second felt everlasting as you hummed.

“Hmmmmm, day. Because…well, I don’t know actually. I don’t dwell on things, or wonder why very much.”

Angel couldn’t help but comment on that. “I can see that.”

You glance at Day, who rested, before remarking:

"The animals here share that mentality. Which is why I relish my appearance with them. They worry not of time thus they're never dreading death. Similarly to myself."

There was a pause before Angel frowned. "I hate animals."

Day’s ear, in rest, twitches narrowly.

"…You must hate death also," you conclude.

Everything you did, and everything you felt, you absorbed; soaking in knowledge and experience.

You shut your eyes tightly and covered your ears heavily. At the top of the mountain, the wind blew by so quickly that all you could feel was the breeze rushing by; all you could hear was the hazy murmur of rough currents pounding the sides of your head. The winds tortured your senses, and right now, you needed to think freely.

You opened your eyes slowly and took a deep breath.

You looked out into the distance, the same sight you caught before, a daint village near a beach encasing your view. Alas the traveling has ended. When you peeked over the mountain edge, the climb down was visually rocky and choppy, dangerous overall. It was a good thing Angel was with you because if you had tried to do that climb alone, it was certain that it would not have gone smoothly.

Though, it wasn’t all that certain that the trip down would go smoothly now as a duo.

As you turned to face Angel, you noticed that they were also looking at the steep descent with a furrowed brow. The two of you had been on the walking for weeks, traveling together to get to this exact spot. Now that you were finally here, the reality of the situation was beginning to set in. You could tell that Angel was feeling apprehensive about the climb down, and you couldn't blame them. The rocky terrain looked even more treacherous from this height.

Day stood next to your leg, fur rubbing against your feet. The feeling of their fur absorbed your concerns for a simple moment.

As you crouched down and rubbed behind Day's ears, memories flooded your mind. You remembered the day you found Day wandering alone in the woods, with no mother or siblings in sight. The little rabbit had been so small and vulnerable, and you knew you had to take care of them.

Ever since then, Day had been your constant companion throughout your journey. They had brought you comfort during the long and lonely nights, and their soft fur had provided warmth when the cold became too much to bear. You had grown attached to the little rabbit, and the thought of leaving them behind made your heart ache.

You knew, however, that bringing Day with you was impossible. The climb down from the mountain was treacherous and dangerous, and even if Day survived the fall, they would not be able to keep up with your pace. You couldn't bear the thought of Day being left behind, but you had no other choice.

You took one last look at Day, who had now fallen asleep. ”Day, I cannot bring you with me. You must stay on the mountain.” Your words go unheard as all you heard in response were Day’s little snores. You gently stroked their fur for the very last time before standing up from that spot.

Angel watched you from the short distance.

You walked beside him near the cliff, leaving Day behind before she could notice you had left. You then pointed in the distance.“That’s the village,” you state. “There will be others there. However, the climb is quite challenging. We’ll be able to do it together if we use each other as support.”

You leaned over the cliff, holding your hand behind yourself for Angel to grab. “Hold my hand. I’ll balance you and we’ll go together,” you tell him.

Instead of reaching for your hand, he pulls both his hands to his chest frantically. “I can’t. Please, leave me. I beg you to leave me behind _____.”

Your hand retreats and you turn back to him. “Why do you insist?”

He bit his bottom lip. “I hurt,” he confesses.

“My entire existence is diabolical. I…I drain life-spans with my touch.” His fist shook as he confessed to what he was. “I’m a Devil. And surely, my touch will kill you by the time we make down.…and I fear your death."

The sound of the wind surrounds you like a choir singing in harmony. The mountain is peaceful, and you take a moment to reflect on Angel's confession. You realize that his revelation has given you a sense of comfort and reassurance. For your whole existence in this new world, you felt like an outcast and different from these other lifeforms, carrying a diabolic burden that no one else could understand. But in that moment, you realized that you were not alone. You were both unwanted, facing a world that feared or rejected you.

He was unwanted, but you wanted him.

Despite the fear and danger that Angel's touch posed, you could sense that he was not evil, but rather a victim of his circumstances. You could relate to the pain he felt, the isolation and fear that came with being different.

“Do not be frightened, Angel. As we are all devils sometimes. Doesn’t make us awful. Time is so short and limited that…we feel like every little thing we do in that short time matters, when it doesn't. Rather be changed in the flick of seconds.”

Angel at first hesitates to accept your offer, so you take a step closer to him and gently grasp his hand. For a moment, he looks surprised and uncertain, but as you begin to caress his hand. His hand was limp in yours, as if he's never experienced this kind of touch before, one that isn't laced with fear or rejection. A look of realization then crosses his face as he put each puzzle pieces you together.

“I love you, Angel. As we exist together. You’re a sun. The world needs you, Angel Devil. I’m the moon, constantly chasing after you. Changing time for you,” you confess.

With his hand in yours, you pull him gently towards you, signaling that you want him to follow you down the mountain. Your look around at him as you pulled him. It is the way in which you look around at him, staring into his eyes, and the way in which they tick, that hypnotises him. Your voice comforted any nerve left in his body.

“I’ll love you till the end of time, and I would never change this moment.”

Devil eyes that were as beautiful as an angel: you, the Time Devil.

Time: devourer of all things.

Angel and you strolled along the beach, your entwined fingers serving as a physical reminder of your profound connection, a sense of tranquility enveloped you both. Months to almost a year have passed since you and Angel made the climb down and abandoned the mountains grace, along with leaving Day behind. The villagers of the town had wholeheartedly embraced your presence, and you and Angel’s time spent together had become a cherished tapestry of shared experiences and memories.

Lost in your own world, your steps slowed as Angel noticed a figure in the distance—a woman, her presence commanding attention amidst the vast expanse of sand and sea. An air of intrigue settled over you, prompting a hushed silence to descend upon your conversation. You, ever perceptive, followed his gaze and locked eyes with the enigmatic woman.

“Someone’s on the beach,” Angel stated.

The mysterious figure possessed an ethereal beauty, accentuated by her cascading waves of light red hair, gracefully woven into a loose braid. As the gentle ocean breeze played with her tresses, it seemed to imbue them with a mesmerizing glow. Her gaze remained fixed on the horizon, her eyes reflecting the vastness of the ever-unfolding ocean.

“I don’t recognize them. Though I can’t really see them. Perhaps it's someone from another village.”

You squeezed his hand. “Angel, we’re not supposed to approach strangers.”

Nevertheless, curiosity beckoned both Angel and you, urging you forward, hand in hand, toward the unknown. Each step felt weightless yet purposeful, a shared determination to uncover the identity and purpose of this captivating presence.

As you approached, the distant figure turned slightly, her eyes meeting yours with an intense yet gentle gaze. There was an air of familiarity in her expression, primarily her striking yellow eyes with rings. The woman's countenance held a quiet wisdom, as if she had traversed through time itself, collecting its secrets and stories.

She waved the closer you got. “Hello, over here!” she shouted.

The rhythmic sound of waves crashing against the shore provided a subtle backdrop to the profound silence that now enveloped the trio. It was as if time itself held its breath, awaiting the unfolding of this enigmatic encounter. The vastness of the ocean seemed to mirror the vastness of possibilities, as if this meeting held the potential to shape destinies. A sense of connection intertwined the souls of Angel, you, and the mysterious woman, transcending the boundaries of time and space.

There was an unspoken understanding that your paths had converged for a reason, a purpose yet to be revealed. It was a moment suspended in time, pregnant with anticipation and the promise of discovery.

Together, Angel and you stood before the enigmatic figure, ready to embark on a journey that would unravel the tapestry of your lives, and perhaps, hold the key to unlocking the secrets of your intertwined fates. With hearts brimming with curiosity and anticipation, they awaited the words that would inevitably bridge the divide between the known and the unknown, forever altering the course of your shared existence.

Angel did all of the speaking. “Who are you…?” he asked.

Her gaze penetrated your souls, as she broke the silence with a question that sent a jolt through Angel's being. Her voice, soft yet commanding, seemed to resonate with a depth that transcended ordinary conversation. The woman did not acknowledge his inquiry. She openly disregarded you, no, her focus was on Angel solely.

“Say. Show me your power,” she said. Her eyes gleamed with a mix of curiosity and knowing.

Angel's eyes widened, a flicker of surprise crossing his features. He turned to you, his hand gently squeezing yours for reassurance. The weight of the question hung heavy in the air, stirring a myriad of emotions within him.

For a brief moment, the world around Angel seemed to fade away, leaving only the three figures standing on the beach. The salt water drowning the air. Conflicting thoughts and memories swirled in his mind, like whispers of forgotten echoes. The woman's question had struck a chord, awakening a deep longing within Angel—an insatiable thrust of fear.

Angel responded, his voice tinged with vulnerability. “How do you…no way. My…power brings death—”

The woman repeated. “Show me your power.” She then points at you. “That’s a order, Angel.”

At those words, Angel hand dropped from yours, limply.

The atmosphere grew tense as the confrontation escalated. The once familiar gaze in Angel's eyes had been replaced by something unsettling, a sinister presence that had taken hold of him. The turmoil within him was evident, his inner struggle palpable, and it pained you to witness the internal battle he was fighting.

In that critical moment, Angel launched himself toward you, his movements driven by an otherworldly force compelling him to harm you. Fear and sorrow welled up within you, realizing that this was not the Angel you knew, but a puppet under the control of the malevolent entity that had engulfed him.

You focused your gaze on Angel, locking eyes with him as he closed in. There was an unspoken connection between you, a bond forged through shared experiences and genuine affection. Drawing upon that bond, you summoned every ounce of your willpower and directed it towards Angel.

With a forceful point of your finger, you uttered a single word: "Stop."

Time itself seemed to halt for Angel alone. His body froze mid-action, locked in place like an immobile statue. His eyes, once consumed by the Devil's influence, regained a glimpse of their former clarity, revealing a flicker of recognition buried beneath the chaos.

As Angel stood frozen, the atmosphere shifted. The woman, the enigmatic figure orchestrating this confrontation, couldn't help but display a twisted smile of amusement. She reveled in the display of power before her, relishing in the unfolding drama like a puppeteer overseeing her grand performance.

However, she was the last on your mind. You didn’t even spare her a glance as in that frozen moment, a myriad of emotions coursed through your veins. Relief mingled with a profound sadness as you realized the extent of the corruption that had befallen Angel.

You approached Angel cautiously, aware that time was suspended solely for him. With a tender touch, you brushed your hand against his cheek, a gesture laden with love and concern.

The frozen moment seemed to stretch on, each passing second a testament to your unwavering power over time. Yet, you were acutely aware that this was just a respite, a mere delay in the inevitable clash that awaited.

The woman’s amusement remained. She cupped her cheek. “You’re not human. Are you?”

The tension in the room reaches its peak as the confrontation between you and this woman escalates. The air crackles with a mixture of fear, anticipation, and raw power. Her piercing gaze never wavers, locked onto you with an intensity that sends chills down your spine.

You recognize the danger emanating from her, a woman shrouded in mystery and possessing unimaginable strength. She exudes an aura of dominance, as if she is used to being in control of every situation. But in this moment, you stand before her as an equal, ready to challenge her authority.

As you extend your hand, prepared to unleash your formidable ability to freeze time, the woman's movements are swift, almost too fast for your eyes to follow. She points at Angel, her smile widening, her eyes gleaming with a mix of sadistic pleasure and curiosity. A sinking feeling washes over you as you realize you have underestimated her once again.

“Explode.”

Before you can react, a deafening explosion tears through the air, filling the space with a blinding sand and a cacophony of destruction. The force of the explosion rattles your senses, causing your hand to tremble involuntarily. Your eyes widen in shock and horror as the remnants of Angel's existence dissipate into a bloody mess onto your form, and the warmth previously in your palm, now nothing.

The woman stands there, unaffected and unmoved by the chaos she has orchestrated. Her gaze locks onto you once more, this time filled with an unsettling mix of disbelief and calculation.

In that moment, the realization dawns upon you. She has deemed you a threat. She acknowledges that you are a devil of exceptional power, one who possesses the potential to bring about her downfall. A devil of your magnitude, left unchecked, could disrupt the delicate balance she has crafted within this human society.

Before she could speak another word you shut your eyes, a surge of energy courses through your being, and a kaleidoscope of colors dances behind your eyelids. The familiar sensations of your body dissolve, and for a fleeting moment, you feel weightless, as if suspended between reality and the unknown. As time and space bend around you, the outside world blurs and distorts, warping and reshaping like a malleable canvas. In this transcendent state, the boundaries of the present fade away, replaced by a palpable connection to the past.

The sensation is both exhilarating and disorienting, as if you are being stretched and compressed through the fabric of time itself. The passing of a mere second feels like an eternity as you traverse the chronological tapestry. Memories and emotions intertwine, forming a tapestry of experiences that unfolds before your mind's eye. Scenes from bygone days flicker in and out of focus, as if you are leafing through the pages of a forgotten history book.

You then open your eyes, and once again find yourself back at the beach, hand in hand with Angel, just as before. The sun casts a warm glow over the sand, and the rhythmic sound of crashing waves fills the air. However, a sense of foreboding grips your heart as you spot the familiar figure of the woman in the distance.

A shiver runs down your spine, and you instinctively halt, causing Angel to stop beside you. His gaze follows yours, fixed upon the mysterious woman. “Someone’s on the beach,” he commented.

In this moment, you realize that your previous encounter with this woman did not alter your fate but merely delayed it. The knowledge dawns on you that her intentions are sinister, and she poses a grave threat to both you, Angel, but most importantly, the villagers who had only ever been so kind to you. Your mind races, trying to decipher a way to protect them all from the impending danger. At least..for a little longer.

“I don’t recognize them. Though I can’t really see them. Perhaps it's someone from another village?”

Angels words that now sound like a recording are unheard as you stand there, the weight of time burdening upon your shoulders. You know that time is running out, and the choices you make in this crucial moment will determine not only your own destiny but also the safety of your beloved Angel. The stakes are high, and the path forward is uncertain, but you are resolved to fight against the forces that seek to harm you, clinging to the possibility of perhaps rewriting your own tragic ending.

You turn to Angel, grabbing his shoulders. “Angel, I’m going to do something very brash. So that you can live a little longer. If I don’t come back, Angel, just know…that I love you till the end of time.”

He should’ve said he loves you back, but he didn't. He was startled. “What?”

You ignore his response and remove your grip. “Now go back to the village. For everyone's sake.”

Just as your said, Angel sprinted back to the village, confusion clouding his mind. He didn't fully grasp the gravity of the situation or understand the motivations behind the encounter. The urgency in your voice had spurred him into action, but now doubts crept in, accompanied by a sense of unease.

When he turned for one last glance, he saw your figure, walking purposefully toward the women with red hair, who beckoned you, their hands gesturing urgently as they called out words that were carried away by the wind. Angel strained his ears, hoping to catch a snippet of the conversation, but it was futile. Their words remained a mystery to him in this reality. A part of him wanted to go back, to demand answers, but something held him back—a lingering trust your intentions.

Though no one ever saw the you, the Time Devil, again, and little ever got the chance to know of your existence.

All witnesses of you, were dead and gone in the following month after your disappearance, killed by the person who survived—and last saw you.

Painfully, Angel was cursed with never remembering you. Angel forgot a significant moment in his life. A moment in time in which he loved someone, and in turn, was loved back; yet, now the past is far behind him, and the future does not exist.

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© UNDERSCAR 2023 - All rights are reserved to underscar. Do not repost, copy, change/modify, plagiarize, translate or screenshot my work: this will also include not reposting my writing on other social media platforms and writing platforms.

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scribbleshrimp · 1 year ago

Note

don't feel pressured to do so at all, but do you think you'll ever post escam again? (even if it's not on tiktok)

I want to archive all the original posts on ao3 at some point and give it the proper ending and conclusion I wrote, but it might take awhile. Ive been very busy and honestly that series is a weird cumulation of all my teenage angst which is hard to reread. Plus a lot of the writing and character conversations come off as shallow and inauthentic in hindsight. I will likely end up rewriting a lot of it if I ever do go back. But I’ll definitely attempt to finish it for those who are invested, I can’t stand incomplete stories.

(On that note, I’ll finish my stupid Batman and tma fics I started when I was in highschool as well lmfao. Can’t believe it’s been almost a year since I updated either. I’ll get to them eventually….)

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yeonkimintakecare · 1 year ago

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Masterlist

I only really get time to write when I am not busy at work, so I may be slow to post.

also, a lot of my current posting are old ones from my old instagram account, which is like 3 years old and I was either tipsy or drunk when i wrote them.

Kim Namjoon

Cheap Vacations - oneshot

Summary: You’ve been in recovery for awhile now, and you’re so tired of the people around you coddling you. You ask your boyfriend to come with you on a spontaneous trip, but will he end up disappointing you?

Warnings: reader in recovery for a drug addiction, lot of talk about recovery and mental illness, pretty angsty.

Kim Seokjin

Bus Stop Meet Cute - oneshot

Summary: You’re known for always having your head in the clouds, dreaming yourself a better life. One day you try to make your dreams a reality by doing something extremely out of character.

Warnings: I don’t think any? Let me know if you think there should be. It’s mainly just fluff?

Min Yoongi

Jealousy, Jealousy - oneshot

Summary: You and Yoongi are going through a rough patch in your relationship while you guys decide to go out with your friends.

Warnings: Alcohol mentioned, some fighting, drunk rando non-consensual dancing, implied sex (sorry I didn’t really write smut back then. Still don’t really.

Jung Hoseok

Best Friend's Brother - oneshot

Summary: You’ve always had a crush on Hobi, but your best friend is his little sister, so nothing could ever happen between the two of you…right?

Warnings: brief mentions of alcohol, some swearing, some fighting.

Park Jimin

Date Auction - oneshot

coming soon...

Kim Taehyung

Washed Up - Series

Summary: you retired from your successful acting career after a dating scandal and breaking your lover’s heart. Years have passed and you are considering going back, but you would be working with your ex, Kim Taehyung.

Taehyung harbors a lot of anger and resentment towards and isn’t going to make your time on set easy.

You have your work cut out for you, but will you be able to persist without falling into old habits? Will you be reminded why you quit in the first place?

Warnings: mentions of alcoholism, swearing, angst.

Jeon Jungkook

Bad Friends - oneshot

Summary: After your friends abandon you on your birthday your forced to interact with your ex for the first time since you broke up with him.

Warnings: angst, lack of communication, as the title says… bad friendships.

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veilder · 1 year ago

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[20 Question Fic Writer Game]

Thanks for the tag @eomma-jpeg! This looks fun. :D

How many works do you have on AO3?

Twenty, if you can believe it, omg. Though, tbf, most of them are just little oneshots, lol. I only have a few chapter fics to my name. XD

What is your AO3 word count?

It's apparently 189,048... Which feels like far too much for what I've written, but okay. 😅

What fandoms do you write for?

As of right now, the only fics I've posted are (mostly) for Detroit: Become Human and (one singular one) for Trigun. I've also maybe started a few things for Genshin Impact and The Silmarillion, but nothing even anywhere near done, lol. But maybe one day!

What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Nearness of You (981)

A Simple Equation (847)

In a Name (604)

we're just two lost souls (swimming in a fish bowl) (501)

In a Flash (309)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Oh yes. I love getting comments, they mean so much to me? Even if it takes me awhile, I will respond to your comment!

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Pft, well, right now, it's a story called Reflections that I never finished writing. XD I left it off on a really uhhhhh... horrible cliffhanger... and haven't updated since... >_> But yeah, as a general rule, I don't do angsty endings. No matter what I put a character through, they're getting out in the end.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Absolutely The Nearness of You. Lol, the entire goal of that fic was to be like... the anti-angst. XD The DBH fandom really loves going dark and I was deliberately setting out to write something happy to try and counteract it all, omg. Not that it doesn't have a few serious moments to it of course but, overall, it just a light, fluffy romcom with (I think) a pretty funny ending, so yeah. XD

Do you get hate on fics?

Not for my fics in particular, per se, but I've had some run-ins with folks who don't like the ships I write for... Which isn't fun. >_>

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nah, no smut for me. Tbh, even writing kissing makes me squirm, I am so ace. XD I think I would implode if I even tried, wow.

Do you write crossovers?

I've... dabbled. Nothing I've ever published or anything, but I've had a lot of crossover ideas and stuff? And I've attempted to write a few, but nothing that ever got even close to finished, lol. Crossovers are fun to think about though. XD

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not a fic, no, but an idea? Uh, I used to get very elaborate with my prompts, with a lot of detail and stuff. Basically like mini outlines. (See my pinned message on my blog if you're curious, I have a whole list of them up there. XD) But yeah, one of them I shared with a former friend who I ended up having a huge falling out with. Well, they eventually wrote and published the idea awhile after we stopped being friends and like... fine, that's alright and all, but it sure would've been nice to get some credit for it... I don't care that they used it, only that any association with me is completely absent from the fic. :/

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, not to my knowledge!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nothing published, lol. I've attempted one before (with that same former friend I mentioned above), but that obviously didn't pan out. However, now I am writing a much more successful attempt with my buddy, @eomma-jpeg! So finger's crossed that eventually gets posted one of these days, I love it so much.

What's your all-time favourite ship?

All-time fave?!?!?! Oh no.... How can I pick just one? Listen, you're just gonna have to deal with me listing one for each of my main fandoms rn, because I can't possible choose. For DBH, definitely Convin? (Connor/Gavin Reed) (Though damn, North60 is a close second these days. 👀) For Genshin... Ugh, I'm such a slut for Chili. (Childe/Zhongli) And for Trigun... Ugh, it's gotta be Millyons, right? (Milly Thompson/Millions Knives) I adore all these ships sm. 😭😭😭

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will?

GD DBH COFFEESHOP FIC THAT I'VE HAD FIVE CHAPTERS WRITTEN FOR FOR LIKE THREE YEARS NOW BUT CAN'T FUCKIN FINISH, UGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😡

What are your writing strengths?

Ugh, geez, I don't know? Uh... I think I'm good at... description? Or like, setting the scene? I've also gotten a few compliments on my action scenes before, too, which I was kinda blown away by cuz I didn't think they were anything special, lol! But... yeah, maybe those?

What are your writing weaknesses?

Lololololololol, how about actually writing?!?!?! 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 It'd be grand if I could actually do it, omggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!!

No, but other than that... I think I tend to rush? I get so fatigued by the idea of stretching something out too long so I think I tend to just cut right to the chase in my fics. I don't much like to meander or get sidetracked with B plots or anything. My fics are... compact, let's say. 😅

I also feel like my characterization can really veer off sometimes. I feel like sometimes I default to idealized versions of the characters I write instead of writing them as they actually are.

I make a lot of typos and stupid grammar mistakes and, despite me obsessively editing everything I write before posting, it seems like a lot of them still make it through. 😫

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I have... used little snippets of language in some of my fics before? But the kicker is that I found someone who actually speaks that language and asked them to help me with that, so idk, is that cheating? XD

I myself and a filthy monolingual, so I couldn't write a full-on fic in a different language or anything. But some phrases thrown in here or there for color/emphasis/character building? Yeah, I could probably do that.

First fandom you wrote for?

Oh, this is a loaded question, lol! So, first fandom I ever published a fic for was DBH back in 2019. But you'd be a fool to think that was my first attempt. XD Honestly? I think my first try was like a Suikoden fic back in... Idk, '99 or 2000? I was a child and it sucked hardcore, but y'know. XD I'm so glad my anxiety didn't prompt me to publish anything I wrote thought, omggggg. The mountain of garbage I would be sitting atop now if I did... XD

Favourite fic you've ever written?

Ah, man, it's The Lark Ascending. Without a doubt. That fic... It's both the longest thing I've ever written and the most personal. I drew from a lot of my own experiences when writing it and it helped me process some of the shit I was going through at the time and I just think it turned out... really nice. I went back and reread it not too long ago and I just... I adore it.

It's also one of the most accessible fics I've written, if anyone is curious? The whole concept of it centers around the characters as elemental spirits and I use no canon names or places or anything through the entire main story. It's the only thing I've done that's tagged with both the fandom that inspired it, but also Original Work. Because yeah, it basically is a completely original novel tbh.

The downside of it being super accessible is that it didn't really catch on in the fandom it was tagged for (DBH). It is still to the day one of my sadder failures, just because I put *so much* of myself into it? And I truly believe it has my best writing out of everything I've done, too. I went super stylized and almost poetic with it and I really tried to modulate how I wrote to match the elements of the characters I was portraying. Honestly, I'm so proud of it and I just really wish it had had a better reception than it garnered, but oh well. What's done is done.

Thank you again for the tag, @eomma-jpeg, this was a lot of fun!

As for me, I will tag... @woppy42 @ewates @sharysisnhmoonshadow @connor-sent-by-cyberlife @detroitbecomeonline @titaniumpsychologist @nock-and-bolt and anyone else who wants to pile in here! XD

#tag games #about me #writing #fanfic #dbh #genshin impact #trigun #haha look at me ramble XD #this was a good tag game though #I enjoyed this one a lot! :D

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the-bi-space-ace · 10 months ago

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I want to do something a little bit different (well… different for me at least!!)

I want to start talking about the chapter I just posted in my long fic and just talk about like… what my fave part was or how I felt writing it. Just for fun. Just because it would make me happy.

So! Let’s get started with chapter 1 of The World Tumbles Down!

I wrote this… right after I wrote the last chapter of Keep These Shadows Out. So a looooooong time ago. I’ve been editing it and working away at it as time has gone on but it was written well before this. I was just so ready to get into the larger argument between Rex and Echo and since the last chapter was still so fresh in my mind it felt like the perfect time to do it

Speaking of the fight…

Ow ow ouch ouch it hurts my heart

I knew I wanted this fic to open with an argument since I started planning the second fic. And I wanted the argument to sting. I wanted it to hang over everything else like a cloud. So unfortunately for everyone this rift will last awhile 🥲

And everyone is fighting. After everything they’ve been through it just made sense to me that there would be issues amongst themselves outside of the larger problem.

My partner and I keep joking that Tech and Wrecker are the only ones with their shit together and yet they’re still struggling to keep their cool. And we’ll be getting to how those two are handling things in the coming weeks.

I was a little nervous about trying to fix order 66 tbh. Actually… I’m still a little nervous. It feels like a big task (and it is. There’s been a lot of planning put into it.) but it’s a far bigger plot than I’ve ever tried my hand at before. I know it’s more complex than what I’ve attempted before but I’ve sunk a lot of hours into getting it solid.

Looking at the first fic compared to now is kind of cool for me tbh. I think I’ve improved a ton since writing that fic. I’ve gotten a better hold on my personal style, on what I want out of my fics. I’ve gotten better at understanding my plot moving forward and planning instead of just writing and figuring it out later.

What’s funny is that when I first started to write it I wanted it to be more ‘slice of life’ with a minor plot that was resolved quickly enough to still enjoy those fluffier more fun aspects. And I think I achieved that tbh! I did exactly as I wanted. But about half way through I was considering a sequel and when I brought it up to my partner it took us a few weeks to be solid about what the plot would be. And even then we said that we could work towards an order 66 fix it if we really wanted to. And back then I wasn’t sure I could do it. I didn’t think I had the time, the skills, or the ability to plot something more complicated than what I was already planning on doing.

I’m glad I decided to do it.

This fic will be the most intense of the three but it’ll be the most emotionally gratifying so the angst is worth it. I’m glad I started doing this. It’s brought me more happiness than I could’ve imagined.

Thanks for sticking with me this far. I hope I can give you a story worth reading 🩶

#we’re gonna call this…. hmmmmm…#Ace’s Debrief #bc that feels both silly and serious #quite like my fics lol #aaaanywho #the bad batch fanfiction #see you after the next chapter is posted ✌🏻#the bad batch fan fiction

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sonseulsoleil · 8 months ago

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by @hmslusitania! Thanks Hayley!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

110

2. What’s your total word count on AO3?

483,852

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Whatever I am obsessed with at the moment. The last stuff I was working on was Percy Jackson fic, before that Heartstopper (and I WILL get back to those wips eventually). Oh, and Newsies is also currently in the works! Basically I have ADHD and I am all over the place all of the time. I'll go back to wips I started 5 years ago and keep working on them. What I've written vs what I've actually managed to polish and post is a HUGE disparity lol

4. Top five fics by kudos

- All We Do Is Run

- Let the Whole World Melt Away

- never saw you coming (and I'll never be the same)

- sugar, butter, flour (what a mess I'm making)

- stay in my arms if you dare (or must I imagine you there)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, almost always. It takes me awhile sometimes, but I try to respond to every comment. I worry that if I don't respond, people will stop commenting.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I've written a couple Major Character Death fics, but they're not on AO3 because they were just drabbles so I only posted them on tumblr (also they're very old and bad)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

hmmm maybe All We Do Is Run, just compared to the source material lmao

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I have a couple times. Mostly on fics where I've introduced OCs, which sucks.

9. Do you write smut?

Yes, sometimes. But I don't post it. I write it for myself and will maybe share it with friends if they're interested.

10. Craziest crossover?

I've never written a proper crossover. I'll write AUs where I take the characters of Property A and put them into the story of Property B, but I've never written a true crossover where characters of two properties interact.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope, but I've definitely had fic concepts stolen. Which sounds petty, but I've made posts about fics I'm working on and had people take them and write their own fics with the same details I mentioned and it's like. Not plagiarism exactly and it's impossible to own ideas, really, but it does rub me the wrong way.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

A couple times! It's very cool!

13. Have you ever Co-written a fic?

I tried once a long time ago and it went poorly. Turns out I am not a very good collaborator sometimes.

14. All time favourite ship?

I don't--you want me to pick ONE?! are you kidding lol

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have SO MANY. There's a Star Trek fic I've been working on off and on since Beyond came out. There's my mermaid!Buck 911 fic. There's my current Heartstopper fic. There's my PJO Anastasia fic. There's my angst canon divergence Psych fic. My google drive is a graveyard of partially written stories begging to see the light of day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing things, clearly.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Depends wildly. I've written this in some Heartstopper fics, because Nick speaks French. And I had a friend who is fluent in French help me get it right. I think when people take the time to find a fluent speaker to help them or are fluent themselves, it's fine and good. And when people are just using google translate, it shows. Also, obviously, being bilingual has to make sense for the character. I also especially have beef with the way people often write latine characters/Spanish specifically. I grew up surrounded by latinos and nobody talks like that. Stop it. You all know what I'm talking about.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

ABC's Castle. Say what you will about Nathan Fillion, but that show shaped me as a person.

20. Fave fics you’ve written?

All We Do Is Run (longest multi-chap I've ever written. this thing was years of my life.)

répète (the only one of my GMW/BMW fics I regularly go back to)

tin can telephones (it's all written in texts and dialogue and that was really fun)

I'm tagging @firstelevens @memequeme @galwithalibrarycard and anyone else who wants to do it!

#this was fun!#my writing #I do not know why that 110 is so huge #I have done everything I can think of to try to make it normal sized #I thought I had it! and then I posted it and it was big again #idk man

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hollow-dweller · 9 months ago

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20 Questions (for fanfic writers)

tagged by @abcd-em, thank you beloved <3

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

26!

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

134,413

3. what fandoms do you write for?

mostly spidey and pilgrimage, but i dabble in other fandoms--mostly voltron, which i had thought i had escaped the sucking quicksand of but alas seems not to be the case

4. top five fics by kudos?

all the wonders i have seen (i will see a second time)

leave the rest to the gods

Unconscionable

when darkness comes upon you

sew your fortunes on a string

5. do you respond to comments?

i try to! transparently, i sometimes get overwhelmed and while i love receiving comments and re-read every single one a million times, i do sometimes have a hard time actually responding. i cherish every single one but also my brain was cursed by the gods.

6. what is the fic your wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably my pilgrimage fic, everything's growing in our garden. it's very rare that i write for vibes but phoebe bridgers' Punisher had me in a chokehold and that is definitely reflected in that fic, short as it is. it's my most "closure denied" ending, that i've posted anyway, and i think that ups the angst factor.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

pilgrimage fandom gets the top spot here too, with love sent to me. it's probably the most straightforward romance/get-together fic i've written, and AU to boot, which are both anomalies for me. but i have a great deal of affection for that fic, and i love the tenderness of it.

8. do you get hate on fics?

the closest i get in spidey is generally people being demanding about updates, which i usually just delete. there is one particular troll in pilgrimage who crops up every once in awhile to leave "hate" comments on various peoples' fics, and i've been hit with that a couple times, but that's just a pathetic person wanting attention so it doesn't really count.

other than that, i really have the best commentariat anyone could ask for.

9. do you write smut?

yes! i firmly believe erotica is an important tool for examining characters and their relationships

10. craziest crossover:

i don't write crossovers exactly, so i'll cop out and point to the spidey/twilight fusion au since it is crossover-adjacent

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge! and hopefully i never will

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

again not to my knowledge! there are few things i would find more flattering

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

alas, no. i love the prospect of it, and have gotten to the outlining/ideating stage with a few people in the past, but again i'll be fully transparent in that i'm not the most reliable person to attempt that kind of project with. maybe someday, and i'm definitely open to it!

but also: it's me, hi! i'm the problem, it's me.

14. all time favorite ship?

i'm a libra with adhd, asking me to choose a favourite is a hate crime.

from the lens of fannish engagement or creation, which to me is different but not unrelated to loving/shipping a couple as it is represented/written in the text, it's probably any combination of Ned/MJ/Peter, either platonic or romantic. i love an OT3, i love frenship, i LOVE where NWH left us and the possibilities we can explore with their relationships to one another.

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

if i truly doubt a wip will get finished, i don't post it. everything i've posted is something i fully intend to finish, i just can never say when that might happen. i can't predict the future obviously, so maybe that'll change, but i re-read my posted works relatively frequently and have a genuine desire to see them all complete at some point. even the ones that i reread and can see how my writing has since improved, or think i could have executed better, i still have love for and interest in. if i didn't, i'd delete.

16 & 17. what are your writing strengths and weaknesses?

combining these two because my writing strength is a reflection of my writing weakness: i'm very good at elaborating on ideas, not so much on coming up with them whole cloth. what i mean by that is i'm most comfortable, as a writer, coming up with creative and even novel divergences from canon, and making the corresponding changes in characters and plot that would result from those divergences. i'm good at the "what if" of fic.

the converse is that i'm not great at speculation, of figuring out "what happens next". so much of my post-NWH stuff, for example, is about exploring potential emotional and relationship-based realities, but doesn't have "plot" in the sense of being developments of the story of Peter Parker as i imagine it might happen in the MCU. even fics like we said our dreams will carry us, which i bill as a kind of post-beyond the spiderverse speculation fic, doesn't actually deal with the nitty-gritty of what i think might happen in the next movie. how things actually happen in this imagined version of beyond the spiderverse is secondary to the emotional fallout of those events, and that's what i'm writing about.

both these flow from my primary analytical strength/weakness: i am great at interpretive analysis, and fucking terrible at predictive analysis.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

it is. incredibly difficult to get right. i studied languages and translation in university, and i still hesitate to write dialogue in other languages into my fics. it's not just a matter of getting the language itself right. that in and of itself is difficult, but anecdotally speaking i find that most native speakers of a language who read fic are incredibly kind and polite when making corrections to the language.

what takes me out of a fic is the manner in which other languages are integrated, and how very poorly that is usually done. "oh sorry it's hard to switch back" has become a meme, but a lot of the use of languages other than English, when written by non-native speakers of the languages in question, read as just that clunky and incredibly disconnected from how polyglots actually speak and switch between languages.

having said all that, language is an INCREDIBLY important part of culture, which makes it an equally important part of the characters who speak--or whose families speak--other languages. as someone in spider-man fandom, Miles' Puerto Rican heritage and both his and Rio's relationships to that heritage and the spanish language are important elements of his character. when i write Miles, and especially Miles & Rio, it's important to me that that is incorporated. like anything, it takes research, and thoughtfulness, and humility--try your best, and be ready to be corrected if you get it wrong.

19. first fandom you wrote in?

harry potter (derogatory), back when i was a wee skelly

20. favorite fic you've written?

i once again point to the libra with adhd of it all, and then direct you to my favourites series on ao3

Tagging: @weezly14 @mysterycyclone @saltwaterpanda @gooddaygalaxy @ambivalentcats @shrinkthisviolet @anarchyduck and anyone else who wants to!

#tag game

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