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adamtheawesomecryptidhunter · 3 months ago

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How 9-1-1 Saved My Life, and How The Latest Episode Affected Me(spoiler's bewarb)

Hello, my name is Geoffrey(not real name, sorry!) and I've been in the 9-1-1 fandom for more than 3 years now(God time flies ain't it?). And I've been really enjoying each episodes in the past couple of seasons.

The story of BuckandEddie, of Hen ahd Chimney, of Athena and Bobby, Maddie, Albert, Ravi and everyone are just so inspiring and very enjoyable to watch. Each upcoming episode feels like something big to look forward to. They literally give me a reason to wake up and face the day depite of everything that happened so far. 9-1-1 has became an anchor, a lighthouse to steer towards in stormy night. Seeing the way each characters interact and be entwined with each other is something that me and many others wishes we could have.

And the will-they-won't-they thing between Dumbass B(affectionate) and Dumbass E(affectionate) is really fun to watch and really something to look forward to. Although this slow burn is literally had us gnawing our hands off spongebob-style, and the many rescue had us literally on the edge of our couch(almost falling off), it's so beautiful and fun and intense and lovely to watch.

As someone who's recently accepted himself that he might not be as staright as he thought before(never straight at all, actually lol), the story of Buck and Eddie is giving me glimmer feeling of how would a guy fall in love with another guy(speculating, but I do hope they end up toghether!). Because even though I've accepted myself as gay, I'm still in the closet out of fear of someone finding out for me and my family. I live in a rather very religious country(not USA I'm afraid) and the people here can be a bit 'severe' with queer people. So as a closetted gay man, the idea of finding a guy to take to a date is near impossible while living here, and marrying a woman for the sake of 'normality', 'duty' and a 'stable family' feels really wrong, as I don't want to live a lie like that, it's not fair to the woman and me(see that Eddie?? I really feel you here mate). So the will-they-won't-thwy for me is very fun to watch and imagine on how a realtionship like that could blossoming to be.

But Last night, after watching the latest episode(S8E15) I did something stupid, something really really really stupid. I didn't even realized what I did until the morning after. I shouldn't detail wnat happened in short but I really regret doing it But good news I'm still here, still stable, still relatively healthy and currently in a safe and protected space.

I should mention that I suffer from schizophrenia, bipolar and ASD. I was diagnosed back in high school but the symtomps has started since 5th grade(we didn't know abck then my parents just assumed it was the case of 'teen angst'). I'm still on medication, and it has been a long time(almost a year) since my last episode so what happened really shocked me.

When it happened, at first I didn't know why this episode affected me this hard, I've been wacthing many series with MCD, often I could shrug off the shock realtiely easy, but last episode of S8E15 really did a number to me. It messed hard with my head, gave me severe panic attacks among others. Then this morning when I finally wake up I realized it, S8E15 hit me hard because of Bobby Nash reminded me of my dad who passed away 2 years ago.

In many ways Bobby's life and struggle reminds me of my dad's. He also battled addictions(he didn't drink, but liked to gamble and smoke a lot). And seeing Bobby finally decided to toss that book and finally went to get help, it's just like dad you know? After a rather massive natural disaster, the light flipped on in his head, and he immedietally decided to seek professional help and he started getting better and better just like Bobby. And I was feeling proud of him! Just like Buck and May and 118 and others when Bobby stated going to therapy.

In Robert Nash, I see my dad. I see his smile, his courage to change to be better, his fatherly positive attitude even though things were bad and his bravery against all odds that the werld threw on him.

So yeah, I guess it's to be expected, seeing Bobby going down like that gave me flashback to me waiting for dad in the emercgency care. He passed away so soon, he didn't show any serious symptom until late at night, it got so bad that we went to the hospital right away. And unfortunately he passed away in his sleep in the next morning. And seeing the light goes off from Bobby's eyes like that, it's almost mirror when the light left my dad as I couldn't do anything but to watch from the sideline while the nurses tried and failed to resuscitate him.

I don't know why I'm writing all of this, maybe just to get things off my chest? Trying to make sense of everything? maybe a desperate plea for Bobby to come back? I don't know. I wish the showrunners and co. would think twice, three times even four times before doing something drastic like killing off a beloved character because of a sudden "creative idea". I wish they would think of the fans who's been watching them for years, who in their heart already considered these fictional characters almost like a family to them, and how doing something like killing them for the sake of 'drama' and 'creative idea' could really hurt some people. Sorry everyone always told me that I care too much and emphatize much about everything, including fictional characters in a fictional firefighter show.

Well if I could wish for one thing, it's for Bobby's death to be retconned. It has happened many times before in many shows, so I'm certain that this whole thing could be reversed somehow. He's such an important character to the series that his death, while heroic af is just to abrupt and make zero sence ofther than him dying and causeing a whole lot unecessary drama that no one want and the fact that Bobby's death was a "creative decision"? It didn't sit right to me and many others. If I'm not mistaken someone from the crew(maybe it was Oliver?) showed a script of Bobby's actually alive and is buried inside his coffin. That could work right??? It's wild enough and preposterous enough that it would fit in the show, right with the tsunami, truck bombing and the asteroid stuff. So yeah please, if you would, please for the love of God's bountiful mercy please bring Peter back and undo Bobby's death.

So yeah, I strongly wish Bobby woukld come back, and for all of this is just a werid fever dream/hallucination/concussion or others

If his fate is really has been set on stone, well all I could say was thank you. Thank you for making the last 3 years more bearable than ever in my life, especially after dad's passing, I don't know if I could watch the next season, maybe I need time, maybe it's time to drop it off altogether I don't know. And I wish all the actors & actresses, everyone in the production team others the best way forward. Know that at least everything you did so far has really gave this random viewer of yours another reason to fight for day by day.

Okay I rambled a lot so I should end this here, wish you the nbest!

~ Geoffrey(for the love of God it's NOT Jeff)

PS: Ignore the grammar and tenses, english is not my native language and these hand tremors making it hard to type proplery)

🚒👨‍🚒🧑‍🚒👩‍🚒🧯🔥

#9 1 1 #9 1 1 spoilers #spoilers #bobby nash #evan buck buckely #eddie diaz #chimney han #henrietta wilson #maddie buckley #athena grant #christopher diaz #And everyone #911 buddie #buddie #Adam Rambles Again #9 1 1 season 8 #S08E15

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corallapis · 2 years ago

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hello!! sorry, i just finished watching new who and i am DYING for more thoschei content. i know classic who has more obviously but i heard there are like also books and audio dramas and comics and infinite other stuff (?) and i was wondering if you could recommend like a list of things to stream in order to get to know more of these two idiots (affectionate) as i am a bit lost in between all the content. or if you could point out a source where i can look that up for myself, it would be great as well! thank you so much in advance <3 and sorry if this seems silly i am v new to the fandom rip

hey anon!! no need to apologize, i'm honored this ask ended up in my inbox! :) and it's not silly at all, there's a LOT of stuff out there. which is wonderful! but can def be a bit bewildering, too.

i'd definitely recommend classic who as a place to start! don't feel like you need to go in headfirst w/ s1e1 tho. just jump in wherever interests you! if you'd like a slightly more curated d/m list:

terror of the autons/the mind of evil/the claws of axos: okay, so it was almost impossible for me not to just rec “all the three & delgado eps,” so have the first three & feel free to continue on if you find yourself loving them (you will)

the keeper of traken/logopolis/castrovalva: a proper lil trilogy of stories that gives us four -> five & beevers -> ainley

survival: the final dw ep! seven & ainley 😼

for some not-really-classic but still on-screen essentials:

the tv movie: aka “the enemy within.” eight & roberts 🐍

scream of the shalka: an animated webcast that at one point rly was the canonical ninth doctor. shalka!doctor (r. e. grant) & shalka!master (jacobi. yes, again. or previously, rather.)

the curse of fatal death: a comic relief sketch written by moffat which features a het version of d/m getting together romantically (now why does that sound familiar?)

for audios, here's a couple that are both standalone & very d/m-focused:

master: seven & beevers. a great audio ft. an origin story that is probably one of the most talked abt things on tumblr, so def check this one out!!

the last line: ten & jacobi. when you're on trial, who do you call for help? your best enemy, of course

blood of the time lords: four & dreyfus. a must-include for me personally bc it has one of my fave d/m concepts ever :)

for books, once you're in the deep end all the novelizations of the classic d/m eps can have great tidbits. some original story recs:

the dark path: two & “koschei.” another origin story that gave us that name for a pre-master master, written by our d/m comrade-in-arms david mcintee

harvest of time: three & delgado working together & confronting the past w/ a lovely dose of master angst

the infinity doctors: infinity & the magistrate <3. don't let these names or its timeline placement intimidate you, just go into it with the idea that this is an au (ish) where the doctor & the master both returned to gallifrey & you'll enjoy yourself!

and finally some comics:

flashback: another origin story which i've uploaded here :)

the eleventh doctor year two: the eleventh doctor confronts the time war ft. my fave lil guy the war child master!

doctor who: missy: aka “the master plan.” missy breaks delgado out of stormcage while pretending to be a version of the doctor he hasn't met yet

hopefully these will get you started! for even more, the main resource i use when looking for d/m stuff is the theory timelines for the master & the master's incarnations on the wiki! i just poke around & click links until i find something that sounds interesting! enjoy!!! :)

#doctor x master #dw #for tv: fmoviez.to / for audios: audiobookbay.is / for books: annas-archive.org / for comics: readcomiconline.li #or various drive folders you may find floating around

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gortashs-skidmark · 1 year ago

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𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙂𝙖𝙩𝙚'𝙨 𝙈𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙝 - ρα૨ƭ 2 ♥ BG3 x READER ♥

Let's pray this bitch let's me fucking talk. It did not enjoy the description of the brain-rats last time

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This fic involves previous DND knowledge! Such as Grand Duke Ravenguard, The Outer City, Blacksmithing, The Descent, The Zhentarim, Bane, and Enver Gortash.

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PART 1, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5 ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Gender Neutral, un-descriptive looks, No name, MATURE THEMES CONTENT WARNING: Cussing, sewer descriptions,

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

As Continued... “Well.” you whispered in a cracked voice to yourself... One thing at a time, you thought. You chose to go right... -------

You heard and saw rats scuttling, their brains glowing and exposed. They were whispering. That’s horrible, even on a rat. You were truly experiencing a new world, a talking rat-brain experience. The ground was cold between your circulation-lacking toes. It was unpleasantly squishy on the ground in some areas, many different textures of squishiness too. The socks you wore, drenched in sewer “water”. It made your face scrunch up with a frown and throw your head to the side in defeat. You walked on. The ground was very uneven, your feet carried careful lightly steps. -------- After what felt like 5 minutes of walking, with your thoughts constantly at war against you, you spotted some circles of light illuminating the ground, looking up, it was a manhole cover. Ah. A ladder must be around. It was a couple feet ahead against the wall. As you touched the last your skull pounded with vibrations of an eerily familiar voice. “Thou shalt be my acolyte, a most powerful human form. Immortal, as fate has decided. Brimmed with knowledge of this existence. Gods and creatures alike. Tav, blessed be my Chosen” and the voice ceased and the clearance in your mind was immediate. Hand still against the sticky, and yet greasy, ladder. You climbed up carefully, shoeless. ------- It was like a flash-bang. Your ears rang and your vision was white with blobs of yellow. You fully removed the man-hole cover and pushed it aside. Crawling onto the cobblestone street. Staying on your hands and knees for a moment, to regain your vision. Standing up, there were a lot of eyes staring at you, sneering in judgment. You didn’t care, you had been through so much in such a short amount of time. The clouds were packed and it looked like it was going to rain. ...your back felt unusually heavy. Behind you, there was a backpack, of an almost peculiar pattern. It was….well it exists now. You didn’t harbor particular thoughts on the looks of this backpack, it was an older stitching style with a better quality than anything made in your realm. You could see the sea from where you stood. That’s a good place to ask for directions, and find out what’s regionally accessible. The crowds of impoverished people were huge, beggars, rugged fellows, tooth rotted smiles, and god the smell of this place. It was impossible to hurry up enough through batches of crowds, to a very long, not safe looking set of wooden stairs down to a dock. You knew this place. You knew this place. Your body felt heavy, your breath felt too light, your focus locked into your mind. These are the Grey Harbor Docks of the Outer City. From Baldur’s Gate. From Baldur’s Gate. 3. You recognized the map, the locations of the gooey pipes, the factory, the Wave Mother’s Temple, the looks of the beggars clothes. This was terrifying. The amount of monsters and unexpected things in the realm of DND was unfortunate for the fictional characters. But you? You’re here. You’re a part of it. Your mind raced with a million questions. You don’t know how to use a washboard, how to barter, oh god, what if you have to shit in the woods. You’ve read every Wiki Fandom, every published DND book known to your-man-kind. You are smart, possibly ignorant, and when life gives you sewer water, you leave, you don’t touch that poop-water. You need to find a way home, or find a way to live. Carrion fear twisted in your gut. Your body was as still as an enchanted lake. It stood smack dab in the middle of the scary wooden stairs. “Excuse me, you’re in the way of people with a functioning brain, would you remove yourself from the middle of the street, citizen.” someone behind you pointed out. You turned, it was a particularly ugly member of the Flaming Fist. “Ah. Sorry. Rough day, I’ll move.” They didn’t comment and watched your movements as you scuttled to the dock side of the street. What now? Oh! Maybe you should check your backpack. Mmm. No. Not in the Lower City, notorious for criminal behavior, bad idea. Shelter. Look for shelter. To be Continued... This feels so short. It won't let me post more.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 tav #bg3 act 3 spoilers #enver gortash #bg3 x reader #bg3 x tav #fanfic

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julietasgf · 1 year ago

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BOA TARDE/ NOITE / DIA 😈 Your approval of Ma Plinth and Mrs. Everdeen's analysis has given me the delulu power of Coriolanus

I'm no longer afraid to throw up my headcanons and I'm making my notes for an upcoming post about Sejanus and the academy kids I think he might have an interesting platonic relationship with (my victims are Lysistrata, Io Jasper, Persephone Price, and Plup Harrington hahaha don't freaked out about that last one. I swear I can explain; it's a complicated issue and I don't think they are friends but I can perfectly see their parents forcing them to talk and them having a terribly tense relationship😭 but well that's for another day). Before I ramble on let me just say that I love talking to you Juli 💖 How was your first day of school? -if you want to talk about it-. I hope everything went well and I want to reminder that you are amazing

Once we've cleared that up LET'S GET STARTED!!!

I think after many posts we've come to something of a coherent conclusion about the flaws and virtues affecting the film adaptation of TBOSAS (The Plinths, the academy students, the tributes and the games, etc). Conclusion that is good to remember is based solely on our opinions, conclusion born of our perspectives - in case anyone other than us reads this. I have seen the reblogs…

There are only a few loose ends left because your explanation of the importance of the space of enunciation from which Suzanne published TBOSAS and why she chose a character like Coriolanus to star in that book was chef kiss. You put very well in words how context cuts across media - and I think it's well intuited why it's not surprising then that TBOSAS movie in the current landscape is so apolitical.

I also agree that the stories Suzanne tells depend on small details that give the reader a broader perspective and nuance of the actions/emotions/circumstances of her characters and that when the film undoes or modifies these the story is severely affected and is one of the many factors that lead to the storytelling of Coriolanus and Sejanus for example being so different in intent and message than their book namesakes

The one thing I did want to say before I go talking about fics is that one advantage the movie had over the book when it came to humanizing the tributes is that it happens outside of Coriolanus' head. It makes a lot of sense that in the book excluding Lucy Gray -and that on occasion. Not to forget how LGB admits at one point that during the day even in front of Coryo she ACTS and at night she finds it almost impossible to hide her fear so we don't really see much of her real vulnerability-we know so little of the tributes on a personal level and they feel like flat characters since Coriolanus doesn't really see them as people.

Sometimes he sees flashes of their humanidad but stops himself from trying to humanize them -and when he has those flashes he himself says he's acting like Sejanus to stop himself, which I think has very strong implications, Snow actually killed his humanity when he killed Sejanus 😭-but the main point is that in the movie the tributes are freed from Snow's perspective and can be their own people.

And yes Coral I think was one of the best changes. And I'll continue the eternal campaign of please people. Read the book if you want to say something about LGB or Sejanus.

(Oh boi. Your comment about fandom proving THG-TBOSAS critics, I won't discuss it because its a lurid subject but I'll just say you are so right and sadly there are many examples cof cof rue cof cof cof).

About the fics:

Well. The BairdPlinth series was GREAT AND SO SAD, LGB and Sejanus are awesome but have the worst taste in men 🥺 although yay for fics centered around platonic relationships 🙏🙏🙏💖💖💖

With "And they called it puppy love" I discovered a couple of very curious things:

I had already read that fic but the curious thing is not that. But apparently THAT was the FIRST TBOSAS FIC I kept in my BOOKMARKS!!!!

Ma, it was a cruel recommendation /j not joke but im not complaining 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I enjoyed it but my heart is broke, I can't say anything else cry.

And we come to: Paralell lines.

I read the first chapter. I haven't read the second one yet. Partly due to lack of time, partly because I don't want to finish it. I've been rereading the first chapter every chance I get with absolute devotion.

My brain chemistry was also forever changed and when I finish it I know it will go on my list of tbosas fanfics that changed my LIFE

Speaking of that list… I've look for 3 fic of my list for you <3

I have to say that in TBOSAS I've read fics with very varied themes, more varied than I usually read -and when you see you end up writing an omegaverse because something in your head clicks with Dr. Gaul and ah- but I have a thing for stories that fill in gaps (pre canon, post canon and divergences from canon my beloved) so that's what you'll mostly find in the 3 chosen ones

Btw I hadn't thought about it before but I think I also have a love for fics where a character study is done over other things hahaha so you'll find that too.

1. out, damned spot

Summary:

You’re not real, he thought – thought it hard, and hoped that it would be enough to send Sejanus packing. You’re a morphling hallucination.

And Sejanus crossed his arms, one hip canted at an insolent angle, as if to say: afraid not, soldier. - Okey. Buddie you don't know how much this fic ALTERED THE CHEMISTRY OF MY BRAIN. 99% of my fanfics are inspired in one way or another by this one, and I consider it canon in my head.

2. odi et amo

Summary:

He knows Coryo would never admit to remembering the rose garden. - This one is narrated by Sejanus!!!! And it's pre canon TBOSAS, <3 it centers around a little school project that Coriolanus, Sejanus and Livia are assigned to do together and I won't say more because it would be spoiler only that it has a brilliant and shocking ending. I screamed when I read it

3. The Haunting of Coriolanus Snow

Summary:

He would act, as he always did, as if this were the only time he had ever dreamed of Lucy Gray Baird and Sejanus Plinth.

The flowers, though — those were new. And despite his best efforts to exorcise this night from his memory, he spent more nights afterward than he cared to admit thinking about what to make of them. -

SNOWBAIRDPLINTH FOR WIN!!! THE SYMBOLISM IN THIS ONE IS WONDERFUL, THERE ARE SO MANY DETAILS THAT ADD TO THE STORYTELLING and I love it.

But well there are the recommendations, hope you like them. Tell me what you think pls 👉👈

Now serious mode.

I have a little rant to do and I need to hear your thoughts but concerning that post about the department… let's please talk about how the Plinth's influence and power in the Capitol is overestimated. LOOK I'm not saying they don't have any but it's not as much as people think 😭.

I blame -as usual- Coriolanus' narrative for this confusion. I think it's obvious that Coriolanus grants an all powerful ability (they are able to buy their way out of any problem) to the Plinth for two issues: 1. At the end of the day he is also a dumb 18 year old teenager who was overprotected by Tigris, and doesn't have a very clear vision of the adult world and how it works (in fact that's a detail that I love and obsess about his conversation with Strabo; it makes very clear that Coriolanus despite all his manipulation shit, is still an inexperienced kid)

The boy is projecting very badly on the Plinth. What I'm getting at is that Coriolanus in the book firmly believes that the Plinths "stole" the life of the Snows, (specifically that Sejanus "stole" the life that should be his); his parents are alive and in the munitions business, they have a lot of money, they have luxuries and influence, but this obsession with what the Snows should be, along with his contempt for the people of the district is what prevents him from being really objective about the true influence the Plinth's have, he only sees what in his head should be the Snow's all powerful position, epically ignoring that the Plinth are district and realistically have very limited influence within the Capitol (Crassus Snow alive and with money, could do MORE than Strabo will ever do with all the money in the world).

Just the area they live in tells you a lot, the Plinth's didn't make it to the Capitol and immediately moved to the Corso. They couldn't, they didn't have the social prestige that was needed, they literally have to wait for PEOPLE to BE THROWN OUT, for taxes to try and see if they get a chance to live among THE ELITE OF THE ELITE, and it even shows a lot in Strabo's investments; the man is helping to rebuild the Capitol not for love of the Capitol perse, but to get a quarter of the prestige that someone like Coriolanus Snow, born in the Capitol from an old family possesses just by existing. Literally when Sejanus gets in trouble Strabo's response is disproportionate, not because he wants to brag that he has money, but because his family would lost everything if he dont compensates exceedingly well.

Which I think brings up the big question: Strabo could have really saved Sejanus if he had found out in time?, Coriolanus thinks yes, I have my doubts but well… let's talk about something cooler

LIKE LATAM AU 😈

OK. UNOFFICIAL LATAM AU PLOT ( unless…).

Coriolanus Snow, too Argentinian to exist. His mother is alive?, who knows but his father I'm sure is dead. The boy has been stuck all his life with his classist grandmother who has convinced him that his family is more European than Latino, and living in a small town in the USA, Coriolanus has made the decision to pretend to have a European heritage over a Latino one. The Snows continue to have financial problems

Her cousin Tigris (whose father is Uruguayan), wants to be a fashion designer, and has decided to move to New York, she ends up living in a Latino neighborhood (btw YOU MENTIONED IN THE HEIGHTS AND SCREAM, BECAUSE IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE, I'm sorry, I have to tell you Juli; I'm kind of a theatre kid; I already knew the actor from Sejanus from being in Hamilton and from being with the LGB actress in west side story). OK THE THING IS THAT CORIOLANUS, HER COUSIN, WHO IS ALMOST LIKE HER LITTLE BROTHER, HAS MANAGED AFTER YEARS OF EFFORT TO GET INTO STANFORD on a scholarship, and he needs a place to stay… his family tells him he can move in with Tigris, and Coryo accepts because Tigris is his favorite cousin and because the rent was so cheap. He has no idea what Tigris's neighborhood looks like but it must be great because IT IS CHEAP, but the fool doesn't know what is coming MUAHAHAHA Because in that beautiful neighborhood live two very special people: LGB Colombian girl and romani <3, who wants to be a singer and has her own band formed by Covey. I can imagine covey in a situation of orphans who maybe were in many foster homes and orphanages and bonded in those traumatic experiences, until the older ones grew up and could get the guardianships of the others and are a big family that takes care of each other (What do you think of Billy Taupe because that's a character we can explore uh?), and LGB has several jobs and a lot of pressure on her shoulders -she is practically raising Maude Ivory- but she doesn't give up and is very proud of who she is. Then there is Sejanus, who is Strabo PLINTH's son. I suppose it is possible Strabo is still involved in the arms industry (which will one day cause his son to make a protest in front of the family business LMAO), Strabo I am sure wants to move to another more dignified neighborhood but Vesta has been preventing him from doing so for over 3 decades, lmao, her family lives there. They are NOT GOING ANYWHERE and since Strabo doesn't want Vesta to ask him for a divorce he has reluctantly given in but has done all the bragging things he can like having the biggest house the block, etc.

Sejanus may or may not also study at Stanford (? but the most important thing is that our boy is 1000% an anarchist left-wing hippie liberal activist with no respect for the government or the elders -as his father calls him-, the boy has been involved in debates since he was 8 years old and arrived in the USA without knowing how to speak english well and his father made the decision to put him in a school for rich kids :)))) WORST CHOICE EVER (actually baby sejanus tried to assimilate but in his teens he realized that no matter what he did people were going to hate him so he SAID FUCK ALL and rebelled and Strabo hasn't recovered from that, because at the same time his little boy stopped believing that he was a very wise man. STRABO MISSES BABY SEJANUS, HE WAS GOOD AND HE DIDN'T GET IN TROUBLE OR CONTRADICT HIM drunk strabo cries in Vesta's arms and yes, this assimilation story is what will keep Sejanus from cancelling Coriolanus when he finally talks to him and he denies being Argentinian AND TIGRIS COUSIN)

OK. So Coriolanus finally moves in and of course he's going to scream when he sees that they're in a Latino neighborhood, the guy wants to die but he doesn't have the money to move, and maybe he'll do a weird and elaborate tour so that no one in Stanford will find out where he lives. The people in the neighborhood meanwhile know he is Tigris's cousin but he acts so gringo they genuinely believe he is, and I can see how everyone keeps criticizing Coryo 24/7 for his weird attitudes and ass in Spanish thinking he doesn't understand them but he does because he knows Spanish but he has decided to keep hiding that so he has to get angry in silence AJHSJHSJHSJHS

BUT EVERYTHING CHANGES WHEN LGB AND SEJANUS DISCOVER HIM, I haven't thought about how that would happen yet but hehehehe

Marcus is canon cuban now (YOU AND I WE HAD A SAME BIG BRAIN MOMENT, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN EITHER BUT HIM BEING CUBAN MAKES SO MUCH SENSE) and well I'm happy with Tigris x LGB, but as you like coralbaird, don't you think it would be cool Coral as a Chilean? PLS or she could be the only decent American WHO KNOWS

Music?

I don't think I have recommended LA SNOWJANUS song so: Estrechez de corazón -los prisioneros

BOA TARDEEE (bc it's the moment I'm answering this ☝️

KSLSKLSKLS I'm actually so happy you're planning on posting more!!! 😭 I loved that post abt mrs everdeen and katniss so much, it made me think abt stuff I haven't noticed before, and I would LOVE to hear your thoughts abt sejanus and the academy kids (AND YESSSS PERSEPHONE PRINCE MENTIONED!!!! also, you got me hooked on pup harrington, I rlly want to know your thoughts abt them bc I never rlly thought abt it before)

and aaaaaaaaaaaaa I love talking to you so much, I genuinely get so happy seeing you in my inbox, get me kicking my feet and all 🥹 thank you for asking!!! it went okay, even tho I actually got lost lmao 😭 I got the wrong bus and stopped by the wrong campus (it's a big university, so there are plentyyy of campus on different neighbourhoods on the town and each one is for different courses, and I stopped at the med school, which is... very far away from my campus ☠️). but since I left home earlier, it was no problem and everything went alright (and on the second day I was able to find the right way, A WIN IS A WIN) !!! this first week is more to welcome the new students, so not a lot is going on and these first classes are more introductory + some events like games and stuff. also, thank you so much for your kind words, srsly, thank you so so so so much <3

BUT OKAY, LET'S GO

yesssss (it's always worth mentioning all of the stuff we talked abt is our opinion and only our opinion skslsklsk bc fandom spaces in general seem to have a problem with dealing with different opinions I guess)!! abt suzanne collins choosing coriolanus to being the main character of the book, it's worth saying that when the book was announced, I was so irked by the fact that coriolanus was going to be the main character. at first, I got 0 interest in reading the book because I thought it was going to be a cash grab. because why the hell would you choose CORIOLANUS SNOW, from all the characters???

but then I read the book and it just makes so much sense. SO much sense. it's kinda scary how suzanne made very clear what she wanted to pass with this story and still people are out there saying the stupidest things (such as reproducing some of coriolanus' discourses). really disappointing and sad the movie shies away from showing some of the strongest lines.

yesssss and I guess it's not only a problem regarding this specific adaptation, it serves as well for the other thg adaptations. don't get me wrong, these movies are genuinely some of the best book adaptation that exist (after all, it's an adaptation, it's not going to be just like the book... and that's okay!!), but for example, the fact that peeta doesn't lose his leg in the first movie (besides him being a disabled character in a big book franchise, which is something rlly important, in the book this was so important for the second book plot), or that they straight up made katniss white (I've talked before abt how you can read tbosas through racial and ethnic lens and this adds another impact to the story, but this applies to thg as well), or that they removed most of her important relationships and friendships with the girl characters (which led to some people who only watched the movie calling her a pick me, which makes me so mad). all of these small details impact how these characters are perceived and some of the most important messages the story wants to get through.

and about the tributes and the movie: YESSS!!! seeing them from outside of coriolanus' head really tells us a lot abt their personalities and gives them much more humanity!! the scene with pup harrington and lamina talking during the meeting is such a good example, it's heartbreaking seeing her crying like this. or then how we see the tributes interacting with each other on the arena. (coriolanus stopping himself from humanizing the tributes bc he would be thinking like sejanus was really something else 😭 but I absolutely agree!! tbosas has this twisted fairy-tale like sense to me, so some stuff I read more literally, and sejanus to me is like that angel on your shoulder trying to tell you to do the right thing; he's good, and that's the core of his character, being good, and when coriolanus kills him, he kills the only thing that kept him from being 100% evil; it's only after sejanus' death that he goes crazy and hunts lucy gray on the forest).

(the way the fandom treated rue back then (and still treats her nowadays, even though I see it much less) is CRAZY, and there are so many examples I could go on for days, starting by how some people literally REPRODUCE coriolanus' discourse and thoughts about some characters, like MY LORD-)

AAAAAA I'M SO GLAD YOU ENJOYED THE FICS (even tho most of them are more angst stuff, sorry for that 😭)!!!! and abt parallel lines, I remember that when it was being posted, I started reading from the first chapter, and until the second one was posted, I kept coming back and reading and reading over and over again because I needed MOREEEE bc of how good it was. AND TYSM FOR THE RECOMMENDATIONS!!! I've read all of three in the same day, and they are so. well. written. it's genuinely insane, like, people will really post some of the most amazing stuff I've read for FREE and it's SO GOOD, TYSM, SRSLY. now, abt each fanfic in particular:

out, damned spot: this one. jesus, this one is just- it really has this feeling of being so canon compliant, I can SEE it happening. it's just so so so good, so sinister, love the slight horror undertones. got me looking at the corner of my room afraid I would see a ghost 😭

odi et amo: THIS JUST MADE ME FEEL SO MANY THINGS, ALL AT ONCE. it was sweet, it was sad at times, it made me smile warmly at how sejanus talked about coriolanus so fondly... and then the ending, OH MY FUCKING GOD, I don't know exactly what I was expecting, but it was genuinely so shocking, the story had a rythm that just kep building and building and then it just explodes in your face, and just. I really have no words. I was speechless. got my hand to my mouth and everything bc of how shocked I was. I felt like playing one of these games who are all cute in the start, but... well. suddenly the mood shifts.

the haunting of coriolanus snow: THIS WAS SUCH A WILD RIDE. I love goold ol' snowbairdplinth, SPECIALLY when we're talking abt haunting coriolanus snow. this whole work is just so good aaaaaaa it's not as sinister as the first one, but it's just so well written (and tbh, I LOVE having coriolanus haunted, that's what he deserves, and actually he deserves much worse). and that last line???? SO COULD, COULD ACTUALLY BE THE ENDING OF A REAL BOOK, nah this will haunt me for a good time.

it's worth saying I bookmarked ALL of these because OH MY GOD, THEY'RE SO GOOD, again, tysm for the recs, they are all such good fanfics <33

look: I absolutely agree with you. I think it's worth saying that coriolanus is surrounded by rich and influent capitol kids (felix is literally the great-nephew of the president, ffs). why the hell coriolanus is so fixated on the fact that strabo plinth can buy sejanus' way out of things, when probably most of his academy colleagues can do so much more, actually? besides him being angry and jealous about the plinths having a life that should've been his in his head, it's exactly what you said: he's projecting so hard on the plinths.

(also, yes, coriolanus' is just a stupid kid who thinks of himself so above of his colleagues, when he's sometimes even dumber than them 😭 when we see him having actual conversations with actual adults, this is really noticeable)

okay, so, imo, coriolanus as a narrator tries to make us (as readers) to think that sejanus' position in relation to him is soooo unfair. look!!! this D I S T R I C T kid have money, and privilege, and a father who can buy him out of stuff and buy his way into MY prestigious school and so many more things!!! while I'm here struggling, this D I S T R I C T kid is so privileged!!! don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the plinths or sejanus don't have privilege in the capitol specially regarding money, because they do, but not any more than coriolanus' friends and colleagues. I just find interesting and a bit annoying how coriolanus decides to 100% ignore the fact that the plinths are district, but he only does that when it's regarding their financial privilege (because when it's to be a dick about ma plinth and sejanus, he perfectly remembers and recognizes that they are district, how funny is that? 🤠)

(ALSO, since you mentioned crassus snow, yeah, I think so many things would be different if that man was alive, and if anything, I think the plinths' lives would be so much harder if he was around, to be very, very honest)

coriolanus is so detached to this that when sejanus gets the D2 boy, coriolanus says he got the best one of the litter, and sejanus says he's one of the litter. coriolanus, in his words, let that sink in.

and talking abt the plinths and the corso, it's worth saying the plinths are living in the capitol for around 10 years. it's enough time for them to prove their finantial power, and still, they aren't living among the most inluential and powerful families in the capitol, because they simply aren't. it's worth saying coriolanus studies at the academy, one of the most prestigious schools in the capitol, simply because he is a snow, while strabo had to buy sejanus' way into it (and mind you, much more money than any other of his colleagues).

(now, this is my personal interpretation: when reading stuff, I usually think about how some things would work in our universe and in our rules. I don't know if that was suzanne collins' intentions, but while reading, I could only think abt how sejanus and coriolanus are pretty much a race/ethnicity x class conversation and how these two things intersect. coriolanus, to me, sounded like a white working class boy who can't stand the fact that a poc have more money and more privilege than him. he thinks it's so unfair he disregards absolutely any kind of bigotry that person faces (and, mind you, HE actually reproduces a lot of this bigotry), which leads him to thinking that people like sejanus have much more privilege than they actually have. it's not that coriolanus thinks that ppl shouldn't be rich or rich ppl shouldn't exist, it's that coriolanus thinks that PEOPLE LIKE SEJANUS shouldn't be rich, and that's another different convo)

and answering (imo) the big question: considering everything we talked about until now, I don't think sejanus could've been saved. he was doomed. and this proves a point: while sejanus is rich, he's still district, and in the end, being district is what weighs the most.

and also, this leads me to the discourse I see some people saying, that if sejanus was alive, he could've made a difference, like plutarch heavensbee. what they don't take into account is that plutarch heavensbee is capitol. do they really think that the capitol, that coriolanus, would let a district-born person get into politics? really? do they think they would let him make a change? that they wouldn't watch each step he takes, because he's district?

anyway. LATAM AU <3333

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALSKSLSJLSLKSLKS I LOVE THIS SO MUCHHHHHHHHHH I'M SCREAMING BC I WANT SO BAD TO SEE THIS PLOT COMING TO LIFE 😭😭😭😭😭

your brain!!!!! YOUR BRAINNNN I LOVE THIS SO MUCH.

(I'm holding your hand and screaming right now because, I'M ALSO A THEATRE KID LMAOOOOOO I've spent my entire middle school listening to hamilton 😭 it was the first one I got contact with, but then I got into other musicals, like spring awakening and wicked. I love in the heights sooooooo much, I actually like it better than hamilton!!! and the movie adaptation is SO good, it's insane; also, after we talked abt the latam au on the last ask, I went almost immediately to youtube to listen to blackout bc I kept imagining the characters on this scenarioKSLSKSLS).

I love your ideas for the covey!!! maybe the one to get older first was barb azure; she left their foster home and find a small place for them to stay. it's nothing fancy, but it's still better than the foster care system. (and hMMMM billy taupe can be an interesting character here; maybe when coriolanus arrived, there was already gossip circling on the neighbourhood because just recently, lucy gray and billy taupe had a NASTY break up, and she threw his things out of the window. at the start of the story, she's already single, but he keeps bothering her each time she goes to a club to make a show with the covey). lucy gray works so hard, and at the same time, she has to raise maude ivory, and take care of the house, and seek her dreams... and all while being sort of an important figure around the neighbourhood. everyone knows lucy gray, so if there's something wrong going on, they seek her to talk to fix things (but who lucy gray seeks when she needs to talk? when she needs someone to help her and solve her problems?).

vesta threatning strabo with a divorce is just such a funny thought 😭 also, imagine that the plinths weren't rich when they arrived in the usa, and that neighbourhood was the first one they've lived. one of her sisters lived there and vesta was so happy when they got to the block and almost everyone knew how to speak spanish, because she was so homesick and scared, it was comforting. sejanus grew up there, they built a whole life there, she REFUSES to let strabo move their family. that's their home. period.

(I rlly like the thought of sejanus attending stanford, but I'll talk abt it a bit later) sejanus had this phase when he was a pre-teen where he started getting into politics and started to read revolutionary thinkers from cold war latam, started reading about imperialism and just reading a lot in general, and he got radicalized. it was strabo's biggest nightmare, that man was fighting for his life, because at dinner sejanus would start "ACTUALLY-" and strabo knew it was so over, he couldn't win sejanus on arguments and they just end screaming insults at each other. bby sejanus did well on their neighbourhood, he even made some friends, like marcus, and some kids helped him with english (and a lot of kids speak spanish like him, so he feels much safer). but when his father got rich, he pushed sejanus into a very prestigious school, and it was very traumatic. he wanted so bad to fit in, but these kids were mean as fuck. they mocked him whenever he made a mistake in english, and mocked when he forgot a word, and mocked his accent, and mocked the things his mom would send him for lunch. he came home crying after the first week begging his dad to please let him go to the neighbourhood's school with marcus and the other kids, but his dad was relentless. and he tried SO hard to assimilate, but his breaking point was when his ma went to pick him up at school, and her english is much more broken than his. when the kids started to make fun of his ma, and she wasn't even understand exactly what they were saying, sejanus broke. he can deal with people hating and hurting him, but NOT his ma. and that's pretty much a turning point for him.

(when sejanus talks to coryo and understands what coryo is doing, he's not really angry, he's sad, because he knows how that feels, except that he stopped doing it much earlier.)

((also, strabo missing bby sejanus is so goodKSJLSKLSK he'll turn to vesta and be like WHEN DID IT GO WROOOOONG it seems like yesterday that sejanus was a little boy who thought strabo was the smartest person in the world, but now he seems like he hates strabo so much, it's so frustrating; strabo kinda regrets getting sejanus into that school, bc if sejanus went to the local school, then he wouldn't be so radicalized (he would tho lmao just for different reasons)))

CORIOLANUS IS STRUGGLING, the moments he sets foot on the neighbourhood he gets his phone to try to call his mom to know if he can come back or try to find an apartment, but it's useless, and until he finds a job or something, he has to stay with tigris for now bc that's what his mom can afford 😭 coriolanus now is even called gringo by everyone around lmao every single time they refer to him, he wants to die but he CAN'T SAY ANYTHING. and sometimes, even lucy gray and sejanus are talking in front of him in spanish, because they don't think he understands, and coriolanus is there with a straight face because he can't let them know if he wants to keep up his lie

ALSO, WHAT I TALKED EARLIER ABT SEJANUS GOING TO STANFORD: alright, so, sejanus and coriolanus have a class together, and this is before coriolanus discovers sejanus lives in the same neighbourhood as tigris. and in that class, coriolanus says some stupid shit, and him and sejanus get in a debate about it. so, much later, coriolanus is coming back to where him and tigris live, and who he finds around? oh, yeah. the same guy from his class. GREAT. and now coriolanus is in such a complicated position because he's pretending to not be from around but sejanus, who's from his class, LITERALLY LIVES THERE (and to his nightmare, sejanus is besties with lucy gray, who's that person on the neighborhood who knows pretty much anyone and everyone goes after for help)

CUBAN MARCUS YESSSSSS ☝️ (also, marcus having a beef with coriolanus bc he knows coriolanus is from stanford, and he thinks coriolanus is too much like the kids from the prestigious school sejanus attended when he was a kid). and about coral: listen, what do you think abt coral being irish? she isn't from the neighbourhood, but she works around, and her little brother, mizzen, goes to the same school as maude ivory (it's worth saying that before coriolanus, she was the gringa of the neighbourhood, now that title passes to him and she's a honorary prima 😭)

(also, imagine lucy gray teaching her some spanish like nina does to benny in in the heights AAAA)

LOS PRISIONEROS AND SNOWJANUS YESSSSSSS YOU'RE SO RIGHT, IT'S THEMMMM LITERALLY THEM!!!! (estás llorando y no haces nada por perdonar a nadie, excepto a ti AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

(take care, buddie!!! hope you're doing well <3)

#tbosas #tbosas movie #coriolanus snow #president snow #sejanus plinth #ask #analysis #au

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dianight · 2 years ago

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Say you want to search a particular quote or phrase.

Let's use "a blue sea and a dark sky at night" in this example.

Say you are not 100% sure how it goes, you remember something colour of the sea at night something dark. So you look it up trying to adjust. "Sea dark night" -> "Blue sea black night" -> "Blue sea dark sky night"(!) and maybe at this point you get something that helps you find that phrase or something that helps you remember more than "sky".

That's a rather simple example of how you'd use a search engine a few years ago.

Now if you search "Sea dark night" you get lots of images, maybe some books, maybe some fandom wiki.

You search "Blue sea black night" and you still get lots of images, maybe a few songs (with missing keywords), clothes for some reason.

You search "Blue sea dark sky night". More images, more stuff that google pushes to try and get you to buy things.

And at no point are you any closer to getting what you want. Obviously the example phrase was a bit out there being somewhat generic. But I have searched before for certain text with little to go off, and somehow eventually you'd get what you where looking for. Absolutely impossible to do nowadays unless you already now exactly what you are looking for.

---

"Little bird, what's to be gained" is what Cornyx will say if you kill him before sending him to Firelink. It's a bit of an obscure quote because few people will kill NPCs for no reason, and there's almost no beneficial reason to kill him there.

This thread is what I was looking for all along. I had a vague memory of it and since Cornyx does come up very briefly on the category I'm working on, it came to mind.

So I searched for it. Putting the phrase directly gives you nothing. Putting it with quotes [1] gives you the shitty wiki and the cesspool wiki, along with a couple quote databases.

Adding reddit at the end didn't work, since "little bird" is a helicopter that comes up in a few games. What finally allowed me to find that thread was simply adding "cornyx" after "gained". Somehow it appeared.

All of this to say, I hate how difficult finding things you are looking for is now. It used to be tricky but you could navigate it somehow, but now it's straight up unviable. And it goes for troubleshooting too. You have a problem with your hardware/software and since most forums are dead you'll get no further than "update drivers/check plugs/restart your pc". Lmao.

---

[1] Now I am getting the thread with those terms, but 100% I was not before. Curious.

#dia talks

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shipsandlattes · 5 years ago

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So I know everyone has already dissected this scene to its core, but it’s taken me a good 48 hours to digest this and I just needed to get it out.

I’m an aspiring actor, I’ve been training for a long time, with a lot of amazing teachers. I’ve watched a lot of shows and shipped a lot of couples. Some of them beautiful and canon, others, well, let’s just say waiting 22 years and counting for acknowledgement, closure, anything, it’s a damn challenge. I’ve seen a hell of a lot of will-they-wont-they’s, baiting, purposeful ignorance, deliberate fake outs, zero explanations, storylines that basically caused canon disintegration, the works.

In saying that, Dean and Cas were right up there on the list with the other “impossibles” because honestly, I didn’t think the writers would have the guts to do it, but I am so f*cking proud they did. It’s safe to say I’ve watched the scene a good hundred+ times already.

I’ve seen a lot of “controversy” around Dean’s reaction/Jensen’s acting choices and whether or not Dean reciprocates Cas’ feelings, and obviously, I needed to add my own views to the mix.

Just work with me for a minute here.

Dean Winchester is an emotionally repressed trainwreck, and ironically enough, the one that is so full of emotion it hurts to watch. When Cas first starts his speech, he’s confused, really confused because why on earth would Cas start off on a rant now? Billie’s waiting to kill them, he just said he knew something that was more powerful than she was, something that could save them. That’s where he thought this speech was going.

The confusion turns to realisation that it’s a goodbye when Cas starts telling him how incredible he is, how his entire essence is love. Go back and watch the scene again, when Cas says “you’re the most caring man on Earth”, you physically see Dean look down, his eyes searching, he’s actively trying to make sense of what’s happening, he knows what’s coming and you can see him coming to terms with the shock of the words being said to him. He then looks directly at Cas. That look, that was pure shock.

Also, notice how he doesn’t stop Cas from talking? He doesn’t interject, make a joke, doesn’t talk about how there is no time for this now, they’ve got to at least try and stop Billie. He. says. nothing. He listens, he listens like I’ve never seen Dean listen before. Because it’s sinking in now.

When Cas really starts crying, when he says “you changed me, Dean”, you can actually see the pain in Dean’s eyes. He’s no longer in control of his emotions, he’s crying too. He’s never seen Cas like this, so raw, and vulnerable and human. This is the hardest, most emotional conversation they’ve both ever had. They are talking about the one thing that everybody knows, but is never addressed. When it wasn’t talked about, they could deny it, live in the lie. Once it’s said aloud, it’s real and they can’t turn back.

This above series of interactions is the part that kills me the most. The moment Cas says “because it is”, that’s the exact moment of realisation. Look at that last GIF, really look. He’s just worked it out, that he is Cas’ true happiness. He knows what’s coming before Cas even says it. Go back and watch the scene again, they pulled that off so well, the way the music swells at this exact moment. Jensen is giving us everything here, you can see what’s happening in his head - he is Cas’ happiness. He is the one thing on Earth Cas wants and thinks he can’t have. He is the reason Cas is about to die. He knows what Cas is about to say and he’s not sure he’s ready to hear it, not now, not like this. It’s almost a silent plea not to say it, because he knows. Of course he knows. It’s like he can’t quite believe Cas is really, after all this time, finally going to say it.

And because obviously Jensen decided that that wasn’t enough to break us, the loaded reaction when Cas says “I love you” has me nothing but convinced that it’s reciprocated. Because Dean knows. He’s always known. Those tears, that head tilt, that gulp. He’s so genuinely confused that they’re really having this conversation. It’s like he can’t quite believe that this is the reality before him because he’s been living in that denial, in that self-loathing and unlovable layer he believes to be true. He’s been under the ‘what if... but it could never be’ umbrella for so long.

What also makes this real is that there isn’t anyone else around this time. When “I love you’s” have been said before, they have always been able to deflect it, with other people or other words. Now it’s just the two of them. No deflecting, no running away. Dean is forced to hear it, to absorb it, to realise it’s for nobody else but him.

Now, I don’t know if you guys felt this, but when Dean says “Don’t do this, Cas”, he wasn’t just referring to Cas sacrificing himself to the Empty, he’s telling Cas that he can’t just say this, not now, knowing he’s going to die, knowing that Dean won’t get a chance to think, to process, to say what he needs too. I keep staring at that GIF above, Dean is breaking down, I’m almost convinced that Jensen was using an “I love you too, please just stop this” inner monologue for this bit. Look at the way he’s looking at Cas before he realises the Empty has started materialising and turns around. That’s a look of pure heartbreak. Trust me when I tell you, it’s really hard to keep those inner thoughts inside if you’re so in the moment - actually, don’t just take my word for it, read any acting book, ask any actor, it’s so hard to keep that in and sometimes you don’t, and sometimes you do - it’s in both the resistance and the letting go that the gold happens. This my friends, is gold.

Did anyone else hear “Cas, I-”, well, regardless of whether or not it was an “I” or a very sharp breath, the outcome is the same. Dean’s gone into immediate panic mode. The Empty at one end and Billie at the other, and all poor Dean wants to do is gather his thoughts on not what to say but how to say it. I don’t think he comprehended just how little time he had, he was so focused on what was being said that the reality of the situation caught him completely off guard.

Also, I know this post was about dissecting Dean’s reaction, but can we sidebar a minute to talk about Cas as he pushes Dean out of the way? He’s sobbing, he’s fully crying. That hit me really hard, I’ve never seen Cas cry like that, I’ve never seen Misha get to play that level of emotion before and it was the most heartbreaking thing to watch since The Doctor and Rose and Buffy and Spike, to which by the way, I find many parallels between those couples and this scene.

Speaking of crying, that brings me to this: Dean slumped on the floor, ignoring a call from Sam, sobbing his heart out knowing he’s lost everything. Dean-I’m-emotionally-unavailable-Winchester is sobbing. Maybe I’m wrong, but I don’t recall ever seeing Dean cry like this before either, the sobbing was so evident and piercing in that silence. The look around the room, the burying of his head in his hands, that is a classic writers romantic love trope if I’ve ever seen it, they really pulled out all the stops with this one.

So, to summarise, I think Jensen’s choices and Dean’s reactions were absolutely and utterly perfect. They both did it so well that it didn’t break from character that these two emotionally distant and repressed men are in love and finally voicing it. Jensen barely said two words and still managed to cause mass coronary’s across the fandom. That my friends is what you call a brilliant actor. I bow down to the talents of these two amazing human beings.

Before I leave this novel, I have to say there are now a few things I’m going to need from the powers that be to not screw this up, help me manifest this:

1. Dean gets to reciprocate his feelings to Cas in person. So, I’m gonna need Cas back and a very emotional Dean.

2. Dean to be actively dealing with heartbreak in the next episode (unless they decided to bring Cas back that soon, which I wouldn’t put past them at this point).

3. Sam to confront Dean about his feelings for Cas, because out of everyone, he’d be the one to hit Dean with the truth of his fears. Sam knows. Sam is supportive. Sam sees it all.

4. I’m gonna need some physical affection, cause after 12 years of nonsense, we damn well deserve it. A hug, and not just any old reunion hug, a proper, this is different now hug. A kiss because hello, in love out loud now. Forehead touching, handholding, really gonna need the works here.

5. A happy ending for the two of them, one way or another. We’ve never had one, it’s time.

Okay, have at it now, let’s speak these into existence please.

Note: GIFs are not mine, I did not make them, credit to owners who I’m not sure of, but they’re beautiful, thanks for making them. EDIT: I’ve just been informed that these gorgeous gifs belong to @michaeldean and @inacatastrophicmind!

#supernatural #SPN #DeanCas #destiel #deanwinchtser #castiel #15x18 #Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #actor #acting #I ship it #shipper #i love you #spn spoilers #opinion piece #thoughts #my two cents #ships and lattes

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pommpuriinn · 3 years ago

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infamous sasaengs

(We're going to talk about joohyoung's most infamous sasaengs who hybe already blacklisted, but aren't doing a good job at keeping them away from their precious artist)

Hates the boys, but LOVES joohyung

(Kim Yeoeun)

Yeoeun starting these unhealthy behaviors ever since Joohyung's debut. Yeoeun just wanted to keep Joohyung for her and no one else, she thinks Joohyung does certain things just for her. She has a twitter account where she posts her fansite photos she took of Joohyung, but if a member is next to Joohyung in the photo Yeoeun would blur them out and cuss them out for "ruining the photo".

It's even worse if Yeoeun gets into a fan signing which is surprisingly easy to get into because of hybe little efforts of trying to get her away from Joohyung. Yeoeun one time just skipped straight to Joohyung since Joohyung was sitting in the middle that day, causing Joohyung to become dumbfounded with her actions. Of course Joohyung tried not to show her true emotions because Yeoeun is a fan and didn't want to upset her. The staff though can't let it pass because it would be unfair to the rest, so he told Yeoeun to go back and go wait for her turn to get to Joohyung. Yeoeun got so mad that when she went to Soobin (who was first by the way) she started saying some uncall for things to him, and that behavior went on until she got to Joohyung which she completely switched and started praising Joohyung for everything and making Joohyung say sweet things like if they're were in a relationship. Making Joohyung feel enduringly uncomfortable.

What Yeoeun known for in the fandom

1.Consisting making hates post on the boys

2.Actually yelling out hurtful comments to the boys where they're on stage

3.Making Joohyung cry because she just wanted Yeoeun to stop making her boys feel bad just by standing next to her when they see Yeoeun in the crowd

(Moas got Yeoeun kicked out that day it was a bittersweet moment for them)

2. The one who wants to BECOME bae joohyung

(Suzuki Aoi)

Aoi obsession started in 2019 during the runaway era for the group. Joohyung's teaser photos were a very hot topic in Korea and Japan during that time which caught Aoi's attention. She fell in love with Joohyung's looks with just one glance at the photos and booked her flight to Korea. Even before her flight Aoi started looking at all of Joohyung's pictures from magazine covers, fansite photos,and Joohyung's own posts on twitter/weverse. Aoi grew infatuated with Bae Joohyung.

Not only did book her flight over to Korea she booked appointments to the best cosmetic surgeon and started her process of trying to become the Bae Joohyung(which of course is impossible). Once Aoi came to Korea she started looking at places Joohyung has been to and taking similar photos or even taking the same exact picture. She joined multiple sasaeng group accounts on kakao talk to even find out about Joohyung's past and her schedules.

An incident happen where Beomgyu almost went up to Aoi thinking it was Joohyung only because Aoi wasn't facing him and with Aoi's long black hair, it was exactly the same as Joohyung's at the time and Aoi had an exact outfit that Joohyung would've wore. Luckily, their manager stopped Beomgyu and even pointed out that Joohyung was with Taehyun the whole time. That caused shivers up his spine and ran to Joohyung and Taehyun.

What Aoi known for in the fandom

1.Try to copycat everything Joohyung does

2.Making Joohyung a bit freaked out after seeing how much Aoi copies her mannerisms during a fansigning

3.Almost fighting a moa because Joohyung blew a kiss to them and not her

3. The one that SCARES joohyung the most

(Park Heejun)

Another one that has been there since Joohyung's debut. Heejun is the most hated sasaeng out of all of them and Joohyung is the most scared of him. He is a PIG(that is why I placed a pig nose on him c:). He sexualizes Joohyung with every little thing she does including what she wears. He has crossed the line a couple of times by saying nasty things towards Joohyung and the worst one of all, yelling "lift your leg a bit more!" While Joohyung was wearing a skirt that day, making her wrap a blanket around his waist and feeling disgusted.

Trust me when I said the members were so mad that they were seeing red when they heard Heejun yell that towards Joohyung. Immediately Heejun got kicked out and got blacklisted, and don't even get me started on what moas did to this man. Moas exposed literally everything about this man on twitter and dragged his name through the dirt back and forth. Hybe never lets this man get close to anything Joohyung is doing because he causes her anxiety and stress. Heejun is probably the only sasaeng that hybe actually does their job right on.

What Heejun known for in the fandom

1.Being the literal scum of the earth for making Joohyung so uncomfortable

2.Security stopped him for trying to sneak in a music bank performance

3.A moa threw her light stick at him and cussed him out

4.The DELUSIONAL one

(Jung Liz)

Liz's sasaeng behavior is a Joohyung pick me girl x10. Has an unhealthy obsession of thinking or wants to think that she's in a relationship with Joohyung. Very similar to the "No pants girl" Liz always knows where Joohyung is at, and Liz is just a big headache to hybe and the staff with trying to keep her away from Joohyung. Liz tries to walk next to Joohyung whenever txt is walking next to moas to head into their schedules. Fortunately, Joohyung's security team always pushes Liz away from Joohyung or blocks her camera from taking pictures.

Just one of many people that causes Joohyung immediate stress and annoyance.

What Liz known for in the fandom

1.Being the second "no pants girl"

2.Pushes moas out of the way to get to Joohyung, but one moa fighting back and grabbing her hair to pull her back

3.Literally get pushed to the airport floor by hybe' best security guard

#txt additional member #txt 6th member #kpop added member

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thewistlingbadger · 2 years ago

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I'm genuinely upset. People will never understand how hard it is to be aroace. I never get to see myself in media. Ever. I never have seen myself. Almost every single character of every single piece of media I've ever consumed has shown romantic interest towards another character. They've all had crushes, partners, ex's, breakups, etc. And if they're not in a couple canonically the fandom will ship them. It is almost near impossible to find appreciation for any character without their potential romantic interest being involved. I just want to see myself in the things i like too. I already have to deal with so much personal shit and bigotry and discriminations in real life, and then when I go to consume the things I like, i can't escape it. I'm not even asking for canon aroace characters, I'm asking for more pieces of media they don't have such a hyper fixation on love. Shows and books that don't add half-assed meaningless romances towards the end. More characters where they don't have romantic interests and it's not about crushes and blushing and dating all the fucking time

#vent #im upset actually #like i want to cry #aroace #asexual #aromantic #lgbtq+ community #queer

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angryschnauzer · 4 years ago

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Stuck - Part 2

Summary: Following the development in your relationship from maid x client, you visit Agent Walker on his invitation, with no false pretences of what is expected

Pairing: August Walker x Female Maid Reader (no race or size described) Fandom; Henry Cavill, Mission Impossible: Fallout.

Warnings; NSFW, 18+, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, sex toys, dildo’s, butt plugs, masturbation, voyeurism, anal fingering, anal sex, creampie, Sugar Daddy relationship, (no use of ‘Daddy’ as a petname)

I do not operate a tag list, however please follow @angryschnauzerwrites and put that blog onto notifications. That way you’ll get an alert every time i post anything. Part 1 can be found HERE, Masterlist can be found on AO3 link HERE All typos are allowed to run wild and free

Stuck - Part 2

Ringing the doorbell you heard footsteps this time, and were able to prepare yourself for Mr Walker opening the door - or so you thought. When the door swung open you could not have prepared yourself for the sight of him in smart black pants and a crisp grey button down shirt, the top couple of buttons opened to reveal a teasing glimpse of chest hair, his tie hanging loose and unfastened around his neck. He looked you up and down, taking in how your breasts were pushed a little higher, your ass a little rounder from the way the heels made you stand, and a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth as he stepped to one side;

“Please, do come in”

As you stepped past him you caught a waft of his aftershave, dark and musky, a hint of sandalwood and rosemary. You stood fidgeting, glancing around the apartment and seeing that it was sparkling clean, telling you that you’d be earning your money a different way today. You didn’t mind, not in the slightest. The $2000 tip he’d given you on your last visit had paid your credit card bill and you’d been able to make your rent on time for the first time in months.

When the parcel had arrived on your doorstep a week ago with a note from Mr Walker you’d quickly glanced around the hallway, no courier or delivery guy having been seen, almost nervous to find what was inside. When you had opened the parcel it had felt like christmas morning, so many little treats all individually wrapped, a note from the high end lingerie store saying that they hoped you enjoyed the parcel. That night you’d tried on the exquisite underwear set, marvelling how the bra gave you the most amazing cleavage, the half cups ending just at the right place for your nipples to peek over the top of the lace. The panties had looked innocent enough from the front, but at the back it was a series of elastic straps that caged in your ass, the crotch non-existent and it gave you no false pretenses about what they were intended for. Having unpacked all the other treats - lipstick, perfume, bath bombs and scented skin oil, your favourite chocolates - you came upon one final gift and an envelope. Opening the parcel first you let out a small squeak when you saw the heart shaped jewel shine in the light from your lamp, the heavy metal of the plug smooth and cool in the palm of your hand. Grabbing the envelope you opened it, your hands shaking;

“Enjoy your gifts. I’ll make a booking soon. August x”

Back in MR Walker’s apartment you were distracted as he stood behind you, the only tell that he was there was the sudden feel of body heat warming your back even though he wasn’t touching you. When he finally spoke his voice was low and quiet;

“You can back out now and there will be no hard feelings. But if you want to stay and continue i can guarantee it will be worth your while in so many ways. So, what will it be?”

You could feel your hands shaking with nerves, hell, even excitement. Taking a deep breath you slid one foot back and moved until your ass was pressing against Mr Walkers crotch;

“I’d like to stay please. I very much enjoyed the gifts, Sir”

“Good girl”

He wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you flush with his chest as his lips found your neck, working his tongue and teeth over your jugular as his hands gripped at your hips before moving to the zipper on the back of your dress. The metallic rasp of it being pulled down filled the hallway, the cool air hitting your heated skin soon soothed as he trailed his fingertips down the exposed deep v of skin. Pushing the formal maid’s dress down your shoulders you let it fall to the floor, the deep groan of appreciation that rumbled up through his throat making your body tingle with excitement.

“You look fantastic, i made the right choice with this set” he took hold of your asscheek; “Are you wearing all of it?”

Bending a little at the waist you pushed your ass out and felt as he pushed his hand between your legs, first touching your pussy before moving back and pressing against the jewel of the plug;

“Hmmmn very good. My good girl follows instructions well. Now put your hands on the wall and stick your ass out a little more”

“Yes Sir”

Stepping out of your dress you turned and laid your palms flat on the board and batten walls, this time the sound of a smaller zipper filling the silence before your legs were kicked apart and a hand pressed against the small of your back. Bending your spine you pushed your ass out, gasping as you felt the thick blunt tip of his cock nudging against your swollen petals, searching, seeking out its destination before pushing in fully in one firm thrust.

“Fuck. Your pussy is as tight as i remembered” he muttered behind you, yet you were unable to respond, your body tensing around the deep penetration that felt so good. You felt him spread his legs and set off at a brutal pace, fucking into you from behind, with each thrust his pelvis would push the plug into your ass stimulating you even more.

There were no words, just grunts and moans, and you could feel your legs starting to shake as an orgasm approached rapidly;

“I’m coming…”

“Not yet you aren’t… you’ll come when i tell you to come”

“”Yes… Sir…”

Gritting your teeth you tried to will the building orgasm to subside, but the way you were being fucked made it hard. Your left leg started to shake violently as you tried to hold back, Mr Walker ramming into you from behind before he finally grunted;

“Cum for me now”

You didn’t think you could orgasm on demand, but as you relaxed just the tiniest amount the levy broke and you came around his cock. That in turn set his orgasm off, and you were pushed against the wall as he came deep inside you, thrusting harshly into you as you felt him spasm deep within your walls.

When he pulled out you winced, quickly closing your legs as you felt his seed already start to drip out of you, and as he tucked himself back into his dress pants he winked;

“Good girl. Keep me inside” he reached for your hand; “Now come, a glass of champagne”

He led you to the large lounge, the pristine white leather couches and the soft net curtains giving the room a bright yet muted appearance. One wall was completely made up of floor to ceiling mirrors, and there were just a few houseplants scattered around the place to break up the stark white of the room.

“Sit” he called out from the kitchen before you heard the quiet pop of the cork.

“But… i’ll make a mess of your leather…” you called back, only to hear his voice as he approached holding two glasses of the golden frizzante.

“Doesn’t matter. For what i have planned you’ll be making even more of a mess than just a smear of my cum”

He handed you the glass and gently tapped his own against it before raising it to his lips, you followed and hummed as the bubbles smoothed over your tongue. He cocked his head and smiled, yet it felt like the look a viper would give its prey before it struck;

“Now, i said sit”

You did as he instructed, perching your ass on the edge of the couch before remembering the plug and wincing as you moved back slightly so you could sit on the whole of your buttocks to relieve some of the pressure in your ass.

Mr Walker hadn’t moved, and you were now eye level with his crotch, the outline of his cock clear to see as the fine fabric clung to him. Licking your lips you quickly sipped at your glass again before he tucked a finger beneath your chin to pull your gaze up to his face;

“Don’t worry, you’ll be getting another load soon… i have something else planned first… tell me a little about yourself…”

He stepped away and you watched him as he moved around the room, picking up a gift box and setting it down on the low table in front of you just out of reach, but saying nothing until he sat on the couch opposite you;

“I asked you to tell me about yourself…”

Stumbling on your words you tried to explain a little, unsure if he wanted a professional or a personal explanation, your arrangement seemingly a mixture of the two already. He sat with one leg hooked at an angle over the other knee, quietly sipping his champagne, his gaze intense as it never left you once. Finally he cleared his throat;

“Would you like to open your gift?”

Reaching to set your glass down, you took the box and rested it on your knees, pulling off the ribbon and lifting the lid, the gasp that fell from your lips immediately followed by a grin and somewhat unladylike snort of laughter, before focusing back on what was contained;

“Oh my god…”

Glancing up you saw Mr Walker eyeing you suspiciously, before you wrapped your hand around the contents and pulled it from the packaging, laying it across both of your palms as you gazed down at the heavy rubber dildo. It was so detailed, every vein and ridge perfectly formed, before a thought suddenly struck you and your eyes went wide;

“Is this… is this you?”

“I had it cast just for you” he settled both feet flat on the floor and you watched as he settled comfortably, his thighs wide apart; “Why don’t you give it a test run? Show me how well you take it?”

For a moment you simply held it, wide eyed at the thought of performing such an intimate act, but shook that thought from your mind as you settled back against the cushions, hooking both feet onto the edge of the low glass table in front of you, your heels hanging over the edge as you parted your thighs and trailed a hand down to your core, rubbing against the wet lace that was soaked from Mr Walker fucking you just a few minutes before. Lifting the dildo you considered it for a moment before spitting on it, bringing your soaked hand up and working the combined wetness over the thickness, pulling your panties to one side and resting the wide tip at your entrance.

Looking up you maintained eye contact as you carefully pressed the first couple of inches in and breached your tight entrance, your jaw falling slack as you felt the familiar yet different stretch. You carefully worked the rubber phallus back and forth, pushing a little more each time, helping to lubricate the shaft with your own essence as it filled you. When it was inserted enough you grasped the heavy ballsack, your other hand teasing your nipples as they peeked over the lace of your bra, trailing it down to your panties to rub at your engorged clit.

Working your body in the same way you had done so many times in private, thinking of Agent August Walker - even before your first sexual encounter with him - it was now surreal as you watched him palming himself through his clothing as you fucked yourself with the rubber imitation of him.

You could feel yourself getting close, the air in the room thick with lust as the only sounds were heavy breathing and the wet sounds coming from between your legs, when he called out;

“Stop”

With a whine you did. Pausing, waiting for his instruction;

“Take it out and stand”

The obscene sucking squelch as you removed the dildo from your aching core filled the room, before you set it down on the box and stood on shaky legs.

“Come here”

Your legs felt like jelly, crossing the room and standing before him, watching as he parted his legs further to make room for you;

“What would you like me to do Sir?”

“On your knees”

Settling obediently between his thick thighs, you were grateful for the extra long pile rugs beneath you cushioning your knees, resting your hands cautiously on his muscled thighs and looking up at him with wide eyes as he spoke;

“Lets see how good that mouth of yours is?”

Watching as he unzipped himself, at this angle his dick looked even bigger and more imposing than the feeling of it inside you. Shuffling closer you wrapped your hands carefully around the hot shaft, admiring how he was already rock hard and weeping with need. Leaning in you lapped at the clear bead that had pooled at the tip, tasting both him and yourself on his skin. Licking your lips to lubricate them you took a deep breath and descended on him, his girth stretching your lips almost painfully, working your tongue over the silken flesh. He gently smoothed his thumb over your cheek, wiping away a tear you hadn’t even realised you had shed;

“Doing so well Princess… your mouth is as good as your cunt is…” his other hand wrapped in your hair and he started to control your actions, his hips rising in sharp movements as he started to fuck your face. He maintained eye contact as he held your head, moving you how he wanted;

“Cry those tears for me, i know they’re not tears of pain or discomfort… its just overwhelming, isn’t it?”

You couldn’t answer, your mouth and throat too busy being occupied by his heavy flesh, but you nodded and let out a tiny grunt; it felt so good, so depraved to be used like this, and as his thrusts got faster you prepared yourself for what was to come next… but instead at the last moment he pulled you off of him.

Gasping for breath you were wide eyed, no doubt your makeup ruined but in the quiet of his apartment you watched him as he gritted his teeth and regained his composure. Finally he spoke;

“Turn around and sit on my lap… legs together and bounce on my dick”

You stood and turned, backing up and bending over before he pressed a hot palm to your naked thigh;

“Stop. Bend over. Let me look at that silken purse”

Knees together you did as he asked, letting out a gasp as he ran a calloused thumb over the pouting lips of your sex, already swollen from the events that had led to that very moment, and as he teased out your nectar he smeared it on your skin.

“Very nice, holding treasures within…”

Dipping his thumb inside he drew it out and hummed in appreciation at seeing his cum mixed with your own on it, before tugging at the jewel of your plug and smearing his thumb under the rim to your sensitive opening.

“Hmmmn, another treasure waiting to be pillaged… but first…”

He took hold of your hip, pulling you back as he held his dick and lined you up with it, and at that hot searing touch of flesh you gasped. You were more than ready for him, craving his touch, your body accepting him as you stopped holding back and allowed gravity to take over until you were sat flush on his lap, speared deep and aching with need.

His warm hands smoothed over the soft globes of your ass before pushing against you back;

“Bounce for me Princess”

You did as he asked, starting off slow, the warmth of his palm against your back spurring you on as you started to move faster, your pussy dripping around him and with each wet slap of your bodies you knew you’d coated his balls and taint with your juices. On one downward fall you landed hard, groaning as you ground your ass against him and his hands suddenly clamped down on your hips to keep you flush with him;

“Stay”

You felt the tug on the plug in your ass, moaning as you felt it being pulled gently but persistently, moaning as you stretched at the fullest part before the somewhat disappointing relief as it was removed completely. Out of the corner of your eye you could see him set it down carefully on the small table to the side, and grab a small bottle of lube that had been sitting there behind a plant pot. You braced yourself for the inevitable.

---

August.

He’d paced the hallways of his apartment from the moment his hidden camera’s had picked up that you’d left your building; checking traffic cam’s and building surveillance to track your progress. He kept telling himself he shouldn’t be nervous; he was in charge and you were simply a plaything… and yet when he’d heard the doorbell ring his stomach had done a little flip and he’d had to take a few seconds to calm his racing heart.

What had followed had been that of his wildest dreams; a woman pliable and willing, and yet still independent with her own thoughts. He’d had women simp over him and he’d had to guide them at every step, weak wristed and prudish with their own sexual desires… but with you… you were different.

For the time that had followed since you’d walked through his door he had told himself he couldn’t get too attached, this was a sexual relationship, one that suited his needs and that he controlled, but with every passing minute he could feel himself falling deeper and deeper.

And now here you were, sat on his lap and he was balls deep inside you, feeling your cunt tremble around his achingly hard dick, and at the sight of your tight back door winking as he’d removed the plug he’d almost blown his load right there and then.

Carefully pouring the thick lube on the crease of your ass he watched for a moment as it slowly ran down, before catching it with his thumb and massaging against your asshole, watching as the stretched muscle accepted him so eagerly. He worked the muscle open, moving from his thumb to two fingers then three, your moans as you accepted him causing him to grit his teeth so not to blow his load right there and then in your unprotected cunt. And he knew you were still unprotected, he’d kept track of your appointments and knew you hadn’t updated your birth control, it had been a mere three weeks since your last visit, and even if you hadn’t figured it out he sure had.

He could feel that you were ready, lifting you up before positioning himself at your prepared hole;

“Just relax Princess, i know you can do it”

He spoke softly, quietly… reassuring you as he watched you slowly stretching around him, and that first inch as he slipped inside you it took all his control not to slam deep inside your guts.

With one hand under your buttcheek he held you up as he could feel your body stretching, growing accustomed to his girth inside you, and as you started to relax he would slip inside a little further.

He was basking in the moment, the lewd and salacious nature of something he had done many times before, yet this time it felt different; the connection was there this time. As his mind reeled from the realisation that this time he was going to have to take into account his own feelings, you turned and grinned at him, and with a sly smirk sank down until you were fully seated with his dick filling your ass;

“OH FUCK…” August cursed, his hands flying to your hips and his head rolling back to rest on the couch as he fought not to blow his load right there and then in the dark recesses of your ass.

Letting out another string of curses, he gritted his teeth and let out a low growl, his eyes dark with desire as he watched you start to bounce up and down on him, his gaze drawn to where your tight hole was stretched so much to accommodate his thick girth. He knew that if you kept bouncing like that he’d cum in seconds, and it was too good to let his body deceive him. Wrapping his arms around your torso he pulled you back;

“Shhhh… slow down Princess…”

You whimpered as he laid you against his chest, his dick slipping out of your ass a little before he bucked his hips and pushed slowly back into you. With one arm wrapped around your torso he trailed the other down your stomach before he sought out your sensitive pearl, rubbing at your clit;

“August…” you whined, feeling the intense pleasure shoot through your body; “I’m gonna cum”

“Don’t… not yet…” he gasped out; “Please… wait…”

“I can’t…”

Your back arched and you felt your mind leave your body for a split second, vaguely aware of the rumble in Mr Walkers chest as your orgasm set off his own, filling your ass with thick ropes of his seed as you lay prone on his chest.

Finally through bliss hazed eyes you turned to look at him, surprised when his lips met yours for a soft kiss. His lips were delicate and you could taste a hint of bourbon lingering on his tongue that the champagne couldn’t mask, the moment only broken by the feel of his softening shaft slipping from your body with a rather graphic squelch.

Now that your bodies were no longer connected he shifted you into his arms as he cradled you in his lap, one strong arm holding you as the other traced patterns over your skin with sensitive fingertips. You watched as he seemingly memorised the plains and curves of your body by feel alone, before he finally spoke;

“Let me run you a bath”

August

He’d carried you to his bathroom, running a deep warm bath as he’d helped you undress, rubbing the balls of your feet and you sighed as the pressure of the day seemed to slip from your mind. After helping you into the bath he’d massaged your shoulders as you’d soaked in the tub, before taking a soft natural sponge and gently washed you.

When the water had started to cool he’d helped you out and gazed as the water droplets had run down your skin, reminding him of a maiden emerging from the sea on a sun kissed island. Wrapping you in an oversized fluffy robe he smiled;

“I’ve set some clothing out for you on my bed, i’ll be right out once i’ve showered”

You nodded and quietly thanked him, and he was finally alone with his thoughts as he quickly stripped and stepped into the large shower enclosure. The water was cold as it shot out of the jets, too impatient to let it warm up as he quickly rinsed the residue of his efforts from his body, his mind pensive as he wondered how he would broach the proposal he had for you. Quickly finishing up he stepped out and roughly dried himself, wrapping a towel around his waist before venturing into his bedroom, smiling to himself as he saw you preening in the mirror;

“Looks good on you”

You turned and smiled at his words and he could have sworn he felt his heart swell just a little more at the look on your face, watching as you bounced across the room and planted a kiss to his lips;

“Thank you…”

He watched as you smoothed a hand over your breasts and down your hips, the expensive loungewear far overpriced but the quality shone through as it clung to your curves. Knowing you were naked beneath it had arousal swelling his length again, but he gritted his teeth to will it away, at least for a while;

“Looks beautiful on you Princess”

Searching through the coffee station in August’s kitchen you found a box of mixed herbals teas, and once you’d figured out his over engineered kettle it was soon warming up to get to a steady boil. Looking around the kitchen you spied the half drunk bottle on the counter, surprised when it stated it was zero alcohol when you felt a pair of warm arms wrap around your waist and a mustachioed mouth trace kissed up your neck;

“There’s still champagne…”

His deep voice resonated through your spine, and you slowly spun in his arms before you wrapped yours around his shoulders and pressed a kiss to his lips;

“I need something to soothe my throat after all the screaming you made me do”

“Fair enough” he said with a smile, giving your ass a squeeze; “Go take a seat, i’ll bring it over to you”

A few minutes later he set a steaming mug down in front of you, sitting beside you as he cleared his throat;

“I have a proposition for you…”

Blowing on the hot tea you raised an eyebrow as he continued;

“I’d like to keep you”

“Keep me?”

He shifted on his seat;

“I mean… come to an arrangement… an exclusive arrangement”

“So, like a sugar Daddy thing?” you asked

“Yes, as in a kept-woman”

You paused for a moment, considering what he was telling you before gently setting down your tea;

“I like the sound of this, but i want you to be specific with what you mean, what will be provided, and what any repercussions are”

Over the next fifteen minutes he calmly explained that you could give up your other maid jobs, he would pay your rent and expenses, and if you desired so could follow your passion for the arts. He would not expect you to be a live in whore-come-maid, but made it clear he would like a sexual relationship, but only on your terms and with your full consent at every instance.

“How do you feel about that?” he asked as he finally finished detailing what seemed like the dream arrangement.

You smiled at him as you shifted on the seat, straddling his lap and wrapping your arms around his shoulders;

“I think i feel pretty good about it”

Your lips met and the kiss was deep and passionate, bodies entwined and arousal growing when suddenly a loud ringing came from the table, August’s phone furiously vibrating against the glass.

“Fuck… Sorry, i need to get that”

August quickly lifted and set you down on the couch as he stood and answered the phone, listening intently before ending the call with a curt confirmation. Crossing the room he knelt at the side of the couch;

“I’m so sorry, i’ve got to go… my work…”

“I get it” you interrupted; “I know your line of work means sudden assignments”

“I’ve got to be at the pentagon in an hour, but your place is on the way so i can drop you home, this isn’t how i wanted today to end, but its the job…”

“I understand”

Twenty minutes later you were standing on the sidewalk outside your building, watching as August’s plain black Audi disappeared into traffic, wanting to wave but he’d said not to. Your phone chimed and your eyes went wide when you saw the ‘tip’ he’d given you, more than three months rent and a promise to call when he was off mission. You had never imagined you’d be in this situation, but you weren’t going to pass up the opportunity.

What you didn’t see was the person watching you from the shadows, already knowing you were their target, the perfect leverage.

#august walker x reader #august walker fanfic #august walker smut #henry cavill #august walker

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tbgkaru-woh · 3 years ago

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your art makes me INSANE!!! it's so gorgeous, i love how you draw faces!! No pressure, but if you ever drew any scum villain art i would love you forever :)

I bought the official transaltion books but I'm having a hard time reading original stories, I got so used to reading fanfics with characters I already know :') or LA adpatations, because i love the diversity in faces of the actors, these nuances are often lost in their 2D/novel counterparts. and the most important one- i'm unsure how much I like mxtx's writing :') i LOVE the side characters in mdzs, but i dont like the way they ended up or the way they were paired. i like the plot, but i dislike the main couples in both mdzs and tgcf. so i'm very weary of svsss being just another problematic twik bottom with his big top and everything rotates around them with the side characters barely having place to breathe :( i came from game fandoms where all the characters were on an equal ground so switching to danmei where it's 80% main pairing, 20% everything else and within the 20% you have to fight for it to have the ship you like AND the portrayala of the characters you like on top of it... it feels almost impossible to find food or feel motivated to create for them :( so yeah, i think i'd enjoy svsss for the fact that I could do all these re-designs and fell in love with them but i'm ver worried for the characters and writing/tropes itself not grabbing me ;; though many who like mdzs/tgcf don't like svsss so maybe the underdog franchise will be more up my alley? thank you for the compliment btw ♥

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pocket-luv101 · 4 years ago

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Smitten // Chapter 2

Fandom: Genshin Impact Ship: XingYun Characters: Chongyun and Xingqiu

Summary: Xingqiu asks Chongyun if he could read his family’s collection of rare books. He agrees and he takes him to his grandparents’ home where the books are stored. When they arrive, his grandparents mistake them for a couple. (XingYun, Moonchase Event)

Ch.1 // (Ch.2)

“It’s great to have two youngsters who can help us around the house. We planned to organize the library months ago but they’re far too heavy for these old bones. You have grown so much since the last time we saw you.” Chongyun and his grandfather spoke outside where he chopped wood. He wanted to make enough firewood for them to last through the winter. “I thought you would be in the library helping Xingqiu with the books.”

“When Xingqiu finds a book he likes, he goes into his own world and it’s impossible to get his attention.” Chongyun told him and he glanced towards the library. He could easily picture Xingqiu reading a book with a pensive expression and his lips pursed. The image made him smile. “I trust that he will ask me to help if he needs me to carry anything. Anyways, I want to spend time with you and NaiNai.”

“How long have you two been together?” The question made Chongyun hesitate and he almost lost his grip on his claymore. He quickly recovered and he readjusted his hold on the hilt to continue chopping the wood. Chongyun hoped that his grandfather hadn’t noticed how nervous his question had made him. Due to a misunderstanding, his grandparents believed they were a couple. They were so excited for him and they couldn’t tell them the truth.

“Only recently but we’ve been friends ever since we were kids. I trust Xingqiu with my life.” Chongyun had never been a talented liar and he couldn’t meet his grandfather’s gaze. He decided it was best to tell him partial truths so he wouldn’t have to lie to him. “He confessed to me so suddenly that I didn’t know whether I should tell him yes at the time. I had already envisioned fighting by his side. Then I realized I want to be next to him every other moment as well.”

“If that is your wish, you must become stronger and learn how to control your yang better. You cannot solely depend on your yang to protect your partner. Have you been training and meditating regularly? We will spar after dinner so I can see how your skills have progressed or dulled.” His grandfather had trained him when he was younger and Chongyun shuddered when he recalled how relentless his training was.

Their conversation was interrupted by Xingqiu. “Yun!”

Xingqiu leaned out of the window and he waved to them. Chongyun had to wonder how Xingqiu was always able to rescue him when he needed him. He leaned his claymore against the stomp and he walked across the field to Xingqiu. He stopped in front of the window and he looked over his shoulder. The once organized library was now a disordered collection of books. He assumed Xingqiu wanted his help to shelve the books again.

“Your face is red, my dear. Is your yang acting up because you’re chopping wood in this heat?” He took out a napkin from his pocket and he wiped the sweat from Chongyun’s forehead. He leaned further out of the window and he placed his hands on his shoulders to keep himself balanced. Xingqiu whispered, “I’m almost finished with the library so I can speak to your grandparents for you.”

They both agreed to pretend to be a couple in front of his grandparents but Xingqiu knew that it must be difficult for him to lie. He didn’t want to cause a rift between the family. While he never spoke his reason aloud, Chongyun could read his thoughts and his consideration made him smile. He would complain about Xingqiu’s pranks but he never doubted the honourable person he was.

“I can handle my grandfather. He wants to train with me and he’ll be more focused on scrutinizing my exorcism techniques and swordsmanship rather than our relationship. Anyways, I’m more worried about what my grandmother would do to you once she sees her precious library. I know your room is a mess but I thought you’d be better with books.”

“It looks messy now but I have created a system for everything already. Your family trusted me enough to let me into your library so I wouldn’t leave a mess for them to clean. I am reading each book and categorizing them. After that, the only thing left is for me to shelve them.” He told him with a small pout. Chongyun stared at his lips and he remembered how he kissed him. He only kissed him so their grandparents would believe they were dating yet the memory still made his heart pound.

Chongyun tore his gaze away from his lips and he reminded himself that he shouldn’t become too hopeful after the kiss. “I’ll let you get back to your reading.”

He started to pull away from him but Xingqiu didn’t let him go. He squeezed his shoulders and he blushed bashfully. “I would love to read more but I’m stuck. Unfortunately, I seem to have leaned too far out of the window and now I can’t find my footing in this position. You’re the only thing keeping me from falling out of the window, Yun. Can you help me back into the room?”

He lifted his leg behind him to show him. Chongyun nodded and he placed his hands on his hips to keep him from falling. He stepped closer to the window until their chests were pressed together. His hand moved over his lower back and he thought he felt Xingqiu shiver. With his arm around him, he lowered him onto his feet again.

“Are you okay, Qiu? Your face is a little red.” His words were almost drowned out by Xingqiu’s heartbeat pounding in his ears. He hadn’t expected him to hold him so close. Chongyun surprised him further when he leaned forward to rest their foreheads together. “It doesn’t feel like you’re sick. I’m almost finished chopping wood so I can help you shelve the books soon. Don’t push yourself. My grandparents would question why I left my lover to clean the library alone while he’s sick.”

“It’s just allergies from the dust here so there’s no need to worry, Yun.” He reassured him with a light laugh. Chongyun appeared to believe the lie because he smiled back at him and tousled his hair. He stepped back and he ran back to help his grandfather. Xingqiu watched him leave but he was focused on the lingering warmth that remained after he held him.

He placed his hand on his chest as if it would slow his racing heart. Slowly, Xingqiu sank to the ground and he pressed his head against the windowsill. How can he maintain a fake relationship in front of his grandparents when emotions overwhelmed from such a small gesture? He would often tease Chongyun but he found himself defenseless against him countless more times. He only wished he could know if Chongyun’s gestures were because he loved him or due to their friendship.

Xingqiu lifted himself up and he peered out of the window again. His gaze immediately found Chongyun and he admired him as he chopped the wood. He was strong from years of wielding a claymore. He moved gracefully and Xingqiu imagined himself dancing in his strong arms. Even after he tried to shake the thought from his mind, he couldn’t stop himself from envisioning another romantic scenario.

“Young and hopelessly smitten? I am far worse.” He mumbled the title of the book Chongyun read to him a few days ago. He prayed that he could contain his feelings during their act and he wouldn’t ruin their friendship.

“This is a well-crafted teapot. My family would be honoured to be able to sell something of such quality.” Xingqiu said as he poured tea for his grandparents at dinner. Due to his upbringing, he was able to make easy conversations with his grandparents and Chongyun was happy to see them get along. He could almost believe that they were visiting his grandparents as a couple rather than merely friends. “This reminds me of the time Chongyun picked up a hot cup to blow on it and the steam was enough to heighten his yang.”

“Please don’t tell my grandparents such embarrassing stories, Qiu. I have gotten better at suppressing my yang energy.” Chongyun insisted and his expression made Xingqiu giggle. His light laughter was enough for him to relax and forget the teasing comment. Xingqiu sat next to him and he gently patted his leg as an apology. Chongyun took the sliced carrots from Xingqiu’s bowl and said: “Though, I’m lucky that you’ve been there when I do scramble to my condition.”

“I don’t think my stories are that embarrassing. It’s nice to see a different side to you every once in a while. You force yourself to be composed all of the time but you should let yourself relax.” He said and then he ate the chilled soba his grandmother cooked. His grandparents were excited to have the opportunity to hear of Chongyun’s travels and they probed him for more stories.

His grandmother folded her hands together and a smile beamed in her eyes. “When we read Chongyun’s letter about you, we almost thought he was exaggerating. I’m happy to be wrong this time. His parents already had high praise for you and they assured us that you’re a responsible young man. Then Chongyun claimed for you to be—”

“NaiNai, there’s no need to tell him about my letter.” In Chongyun’s rush to stop her, he swallowed his food too quickly and he began to choke. Xingqiu rubbed his back to help him. He couldn’t help but feel a little curious how he described him in the letter.

“Chongyun, if you wish to be a good partner, you must be honest with your feelings as often as possible. Tell Xingqiu that you love him and all the reasons you do. When I was your age, I would take your grandmother to the rooftop and tell Liyue that I plan to make her my wife one day.” His grandfather told him. Chongyun’s face became a deep shade of red as he imagined himself confessing to Xingqiu. He sank deeper into his chair in a vain attempt to escape the embarrassing conversation.

“Chongyun is shy and I don’t mind. It makes the moments he says ‘I love you’ all the more special. Last week, he read me a book of love poems.” Xingqiu looked down at his plate so they wouldn’t be able to see the longing in his eyes. He thought back to the afternoon he read the poems to him and how soothing his voice was. He only wished those words were directed towards him and not simply words on a page.

“You’ve found yourself a good match, Chongyun. Have you spoken with Xingqiu’s family about your future engagement? Our families have known each other for years so they will accept you but there is a proper order for these things.” His grandmother said. “I will be happy to bless the ceremony. What kind of flowers would you like for the wedding?”

“Isn’t it a little too soon to think of marriage? I still need to master my yang energy and defeat a spirit properly.” Chongyun tried to change the subject. However, his grandparents continued to pepper him with questions he couldn’t answer. Heat rose in his body and his head began to spin.

Xingqiu noticed the small changes in Chongyun’s face and he knew they were caused by a mixture of flustered emotions and his yang. As amusing as he found the situation, he had to take pity on him and he decided to rescue him. He plucked a chili pepper from his bowl and said: “My Dear, can you eat this carrot for me?”

“But I already took all the carrots from your bowl.” The moment Chongyun turned towards him, Xingqiu slipped the chili between his lips. The spice hit his tongue and heat spread throughout his body. He found it difficult to breathe and he desperately searched the table for a glass of water to cool himself. His vision blurred and he could sense that he would faint soon.

“Yun, are you okay?” His voice reached him through his daze. He felt his cool hand on his cheek and he was able to calm himself as he focused on him. Xingqiu tugged on his hand lightly and then he spoke to his grandparents. “I accidentally fed him a chili pepper. I should take him back to our room so he can lay down and let the episode pass. My apologies for ruining dinner.”

As Chongyun slowly woke, he heard Xingqiu’s warm and smooth voice above him. He recognized a few lines from the book he read him a week ago. “I know I shouldn’t burden you with my feelings when I cannot find the courage to put them into words. But I wish to tell you what lies unsaid for years. Love, as simple and complicated as it can be, has led me to you whenever I’m scared. You give me strength and courage in my weakest moment. I wish to be your support as well.”

He reluctantly opened his eyes and he found Xingqiu reading in a chair next to his bed. With his nose buried in the book, he hadn’t noticed that he was awake yet. Chongyun knew that he should sit up and speak with his grandparents to apologize for his behaviour at dinner. Yet, as he listened to Xingqiu read to him, he couldn’t bring himself to move. He closed his eyes again and he relaxed into the moment.

Chongyun heard the chair scrap against wood and then the bed shifted beneath him. He sensed Xingqiu leaning over him and he waved a fan over his face. “If only you were awake to make the room cooler with your cyro.”

Something warm and soft brushed over his skin and Chongyun realized that it was a kiss. He was too shocked to react at first. Xingqiu pulled away from him and sighed. “It was nice pretending to be yours for the weekend. Perhaps I can find the courage to make it real one day. I’ll be back with more ice.”

Xingqiu stood and he started to turn towards the door. A light grip on his wrist stopped him and the touch made his heart jump. He immediately sensed that Chongyun was the one to stop him. Had he heard him? He hesitantly looked back to him over his shoulder and prayed that he took his hand in his sleep.

“Is that true?” Chongyun asked as he sat up. Xingqiu couldn’t face him because he knew he would confess his feelings to him. For the first time, he didn’t know what he should say. His mind was racing faster than his heart. He thought of similar scenes in the novels he read and what the characters would say.

Chongyun lightly tugged on his hand and Xingqiu fell forward onto his chest. His arms moved to wrap around his waist and the bold movement surprised him. He thought it could’ve been caused by his yang. He only needed to look into his clear eyes to know that it wasn’t the case. Silence stretched between them as they waited for the other to speak with. Xingqiu placed his hand on Chongyun’s chest and he could feel his heart beating through his shirt.

Then, Xingqiu cradled his cheek and he ran his thumb over his lips. Chongyun kissed his fingertip before he whispered, “I don’t want to pretend to be a couple in front of my grandparents anymore.”

“Because you see me as just a friend or are you hopelessly smitten with me?” Xingqiu would’ve used a teasing tone in another scenario but his voice trembled slightly.

“I love you.”

#genshin impact #xingyun #chongqiu #genshin impact chongyun #genshin impact xingqiu #chongyun and xingqiu #fanfiction

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nikadoesanart · 4 years ago

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My predictions on BSD getting animated going forward

I’ll be taking a look at the novel page counts (Japanese and English) and comparing them to the screen time they’ve gotten so far and then using this to predict how long the remaining light novel adaptations will be (approximately). At the end will also be my rough prediction/hopes for the order of some of these being adapted. I say some because I have yet to read what there is so far of the gaiden novel translations, the main story manga has essentially still been on the DOA arc almost since where the anime left off, and I personally think that it’s currently too soon for Storm Bringer (aside from money purposes).

Note, most of this was written well before the anime 5th anniversary livestream but the announcements wound up not affecting it. I then of course made adjustments as needed account for the novel content we do have so far, both in Japanese and in English (officially).

Page to Episode Count

Not counting the afterward, ads, etc for the English/US copy, Japanese is including it

Also all eng page counts are using the Yen Press release and jp page counts are taken from the fandom wiki

*148 is purely counting the Untold Origins portion of the novel. If we also count the A Day at the Agency short story that’s included before it (56 pages), then we get the full 203

Also the English page count for BEAST was noted before the English release date but after page counts have been posted by affiliated retailers, so subtract a couple pages from the written count of 176 for the time being to account for the afterward and possible character sheets being included

Now that we have our page to episode counts (as of April 5th, 2021), let’s find the actual content run time of what we do have animated so far.

Seasons 1-3 and the OVA all have the same episode length/duration. Each episode is 23 minutes, and we can subtract 3 minutes on average from that to account for the OP and ED being played. This leaves us with an average of 20 minutes of BSD story content per episode. So on average, each of the first 3 seasons contain 240 minutes, or 4 hours, worth of story content.

Dead Apple’s total run time is 91 minutes, with the OP and ED making up 9 of those minutes. However, we do have a bit of the story content being played while the ED is playing (as sometimes happens in the anime as well). To keep the math simple, I’ll be approximating story content time at 82 minutes.

Apply these numbers to the novels that have been animated so far and this is (approximately) what we get:

Now let’s use these numbers to predict the screen time needed for the other novels

Note that we can’t really use Entrance Exam as a fair measure because of how much got cut out (just compare the run time of it to Dark Era and it speaks for itself). However, the numbers for Dark Era and Dead Apple are the best ones to use, as they both have minimal changes between anime and novel and both have official English translations currently available. Take out the approximate time taken up by OP/ED and and the numbers pretty much match up.

So with that being said, we can estimate Untold Origins (only) at approximately 3 eps/60 min and 55 Minutes at 1h 40-55min/100-115 min or 5-6 eps if it doesn’t get a movie. We can also estimate the A Day at the Detective Agency short story at the beginning of Untold Origins to take up about 1 ep, probably even a bit less.

1+ 3 + 5-6 = 9-10 episodes which isn’t enough for a full single cour season unless they all get put into one big OVA season, but also 10-11 eps (or less) seasons are a thing (ie. Fugou Keiji: Balance Unlimited, Blood Lad, Black Butler: Book of Circus, The Seven Deadly Sins: Signs of a Holy War, FLCL)

My personal predictions/hopes for the anime adaptation timeline going forward

This is considering the manga content, current “pausing/stopping points” what wouldn’t be too awkward, each of the novels relevancy/necessity to the main story manga, and assuming we continue with single cour (12-13 ep) seasons

Hopefully/ideally a 55 Minutes movie

S4: ch 54-70

Early S5 (preferably) or end of S4: Untold Origins or A Day at the Agency

S5: ch 71-88/around where we are now?

A Day at the Agency can, in my opinion at least, be chucked in at any point either as a single episode OVA or as the light novel content for s4 (maybe not even taking a full episode and then starting ch 54 in the last few minutes for example). Keep in mind that the current DOA arc is a long one and has plenty to it, so personally I think it may even be better to not include a novel adaptation in a future S4, as it would likely already be a right squeeze content wise. Remember, we also have a few XX.5 chapters that are continuations of the chapter directly before them.

I still need to read what’s currently available of the gaiden novel fan translations but it can probably be adapted at any point as well. I’m estimating approximately 5-6 eps as an OVA series. I don’t really think it would get a movie, partially because you can make it only so long, especially since it’s an anime movie and unlike Storm Bringer, it doesn’t have Chuuya to practically guarantee the profit.

BEAST also doesn’t directly impact the main story and can be adapted at virtually any point. However, seeing as we do have a live action confirmed for it and it’s page count lines up very closely with Dark Era, it can be either 4 eps or (more likely in my opinion) a movie, as it can be considered almost stand alone content.

Personally, I believe it is currently way too soon to animate Storm Bringer as it came out only a little over a month ago (as of writing this) and has minimal plot necessity as of ch 91, but I do believe it should be either split into 2 movies (a part 1 and part 2) or it would need 8 episodes, likely as an OVA season. If it were to get animated sooner than 55 Minutes or Untold Origins, which I believe to be very unlikely, I feel that it would almost certainly be driven by the financial gains of Chuuya being included, and his popularity alone. Reminder, SB is about Chuuya and not SKK. Dazai’s appearance in SB is proportionally a very small percentage and he’s not even mentioned in the official plot summary.

However, you can argue that SB is starting to have some relevance now, with the recent mention of the Order of the Clock Tower in ch 90 and the increased relevance of sealed ability weapons in ch 91. However, I really do believe that you can’t adapt Storm Bringer before 55 Minutes because of Standard Island and its treaty, it also talks about sealed ability weapons, knowing who Wells is, and 55 Minutes canonically takes place during the “downtime” portion of S3. In fact, here’s Asagiri’s words directly from the Afterward (translation by Yen Press):

“this volume didn’t take place in the past, but rather sometime after the tenth volume of the manga. In other words, it’s a tale about the ‘usual’ detective agency in novel format.” (55 minutes, p 237)

Untold Origins also should be adapted sooner rather than later (at least compared to SB in my opinion) because it’s about Ranpo and Fukuzawa’s shared past, which becomes increasingly relevant ch 70 onwards, as well as the need for the ADA being founded (which ties in with Yosano’s backstory in ch 65-66).

In regards to whether I think each of these would be better suited to a movie adaptation or as multiple regular length anime episodes, it’s mainly due to page count and partly due to the budget difference between the two, as well as how difficult I think it would be to animate each of these based on what needs to be drawn. The anime industry isn’t the fastest to switch to newer technology, hence why we see issues with 3D blending sometimes. I really do think that at the very least, 55 Minutes deserves the movie budget because of how detailed and complex the architecture of Standard Island is described as, as well all the mechanical parts needed for the final battle of the novel. Hate the lizard mouths introduced in Dead Apple all you want, but you can’t deny that the 3D cgi was blended very smoothly. For any of the other novels to be movies, it’s more so because gaiden and BEAST can be considered their own stand alone stories that don’t rely too heavily on the main story in terms of when they take place and get adapted. I feel that SB is more likely to get its own season or an OVA season more so due to its length, but multiple part anime movies have also been done before (ie. the Fate/Stay Night: Heaven’s Feel movies), so it’s not entirely impossible. Especially considering that merely having any Chuuya screen time means that you can expect the profit and popularity to really go up, especially with SKK being on screen together (regardless of whether you love or hate how the fandom tends to push a shipping POV on them).

These are all of course just my hopes and predictions and estimates based on information currently available, so take them with some salt. I’d love to hear opinions on how, when, and why each of the currently non animated novels should be adapted going forward. Also please stop begging the relevant BSD official Twitter pages for SB to be animated next and go read the other light novels you Chuuya simp

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #bsd theories #bsd dead apple #bungo stray dogs #bsd manga #bsd storm bringer #bsd light novel #bsd anime #bsd 55 minutes #bsd beast #bsd gaiden #bsd untold origins

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whatifxwereyou · 4 years ago

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The Oncoming Storm Part 3: Earthrealm

Fandom: Mortal Kombat 2021

Liu Kang x Reader or Kung Lao x Reader

Summary: You meet the mythical Lord Raiden. He reminds you of your dad, but nicer, oddly enough. Liu Kang might also be your new best friend.

A/N: Thanks again everyone! This has been such fun. I meant to say earlier that this takes place a couple years prior to the film (also that I know a bit about MK as a game series, so I will include tidbits here and there if I can). ALSO! I am open to any suggestions that you may wish to see throughout this story- either for Liu Kang or Kung Lao. I can't guarantee I will use them but I will consider them. I am delighting in writing this!! EDIT:: lol why did no one tell me there were so many errors in this one. All fixed!

The Beginning << Previous Chapter Next Chapter >> Chapter Index

The days that followed were a struggle. Monks would visit and care for your wounds at all hours of the day. You were in and out of consciousness. When you did manage to stay awake, you would meditate and do simple exercises to keep your body strong. That was a struggle in itself. Wounds needed rest to heal but you refused to become weak to them in the meantime. You were ready to fight.

Without fail Liu Kang would visit every evening. He brought books for you to read together. On his second visit he gifted you with a crudely bound leather journal and a pen to take notes with. You were inquisitive and Liu Kang was a wealth of knowledge. On nights where you finished a book or a lesson early, you would meditate together. Other nights you would chat and often times those chats would end in swapping personal stories. You had become fast friends.

You kept a calendar in the back of the journal. Liu Kang helped account for the time that you’d lost to unconsciousness. A week had passed since you’d woken up in Raiden’s Temple. You circled the x over the day and wondered where Kung Lao was. You’d asked around about him but had been told that many of the Earthrealm warriors were often absent. Apparently, he was frequently gone for long stretches of time. Many of the monks left on lengthy errands. Mortal Kombat and the protection of Earthrealm extended far beyond China. You wondered how much of the world Kung Lao had seen. You’d barely ever left your hometown for anything other than martial arts tournaments.

“Miss Y/N?” A monk pulled aside the sheet that had been pinned around the doorway of the small closet-sized space that had become your semi-permanent dwelling. You offered the monk a tired smile and gestured to allow him to enter. The monk bowed politely. “Your presence has been requested by Lord Raiden.”

“Oh?” You had known that you would meet with the man who the temple belonged to eventually. Liu Kang had told you that you would be summoned only after you’d been deemed well enough. You hadn’t passed out in exhaustion for the last 48 hours so you supposed this was as good a time as any. “Give me a moment to change, if you will.”

“Yes, of course Miss Y/N.” The monk bowed and left you with some privacy. You’d grown accustomed to the dressing gowns. They were comfortable and since you didn’t move around much, they worked. You’d been given several lightweight gi for future training and several hanfu, traditional Chinese garments, to wear if you desired. You wished, more than anything, that you’d gotten to pack some of your things before everything had gone to hell. No t-shirts or tank tops. No jeans or leggings. Not even any cute summer dresses. But you were grateful to have anything.

You changed into the soft blue and white hanfu that had become your favorite. It was simpler in design than the others but still long and flowing. You didn’t need anything terribly fancy to have a conversation with someone. You were sure that if Lord Raiden expected you to dress up then you would have been warned. Considering that Liu Kang rotated through the same three tattered gi and was almost always covered in soot, you doubted there was a strict dress code.

After you changed, you pulled your hair up lazily with a set of chopsticks. Then you returned to the monk who was waiting for you in the hall. The monk bowed again and then led you through the halls of the temple. The floor you’d been on had very few windows and only in the hallways. You followed the monk up several ramps and flights of stairs. Endless halls branched in every direction making the whole place seem labyrinthian. You were certain that you could spend weeks exploring the halls and still manage to miss things.

If the monk hadn’t been leading you then you wouldn’t have been able to resist your curiosity. After a good thirty minutes spent walking, you were led into a dark hallway with a rounded ceiling. It disappeared into the distance lit only by odd white statues that stood in a line along its center. The monk bowed and gestured down the hall.

“Good luck, Miss Y/N.” The monk then left you alone. You approached the glass statues in the center of the hall and found their insides sparking with electricity. They were funny in that they reminded you of a sophisticated and silent Tesla coil that fired constantly. Below the frosted glass you could see currents of electricity flowing almost as you imagined lightning would through the clouds. Your fingers brushed curiously over the glass.

“Miss Y/N?” A commanding and deep voice called from the end of the hall. You felt like a child who had disobeyed your teacher and winced. You hurried down the hall as quickly as your legs would allow then bowed before entering the room at its end.

“I’m sorry. I haven’t seen much outside of the infirmary. I was fascinated.”

The man who stood before you was of average build and height, his face mostly obscured by his hat. You grinned in surprise and recognition but then quickly fought to hide your glee. Raiden’s expression was severe, reminding you very much of your father and the way he’d glare at you when you’d said something un-lady-like as a child.

“There is much to discuss.” He gestured for you to take a seat on the floor in front of where he was seated with his legs crossed so you did. Much to your surprise, he was floating several inches off the ground and while you tried to hide your shock, you were sure your eyes had gone wide. “I am Lord Raiden; the protector of Earthrealm.”

“It’s an honor to meet you. Liu Kang has told me a little about you.”

“I am not surprised.” Raiden had a commanding voice as well as presence so you listened attentively. He explained the nature of other realms though he didn’t go terribly in depth with their origins or existence. Outworld was their greatest opposition with the desire to control earth and humanity. They were brutal warmongers from how Raiden described them. He then explained the tournaments and how if Outworld won a tenth tournament they could lay claim to Earthrealm.

Shang Tsung, a powerful sorcerer, would lead his armies there and take humanity as slaves. You didn’t ask but you wondered if Shang Tsung was the ruler of Outworld. You figured that if it were important then Raiden would tell you. He went on to tell you that Outworld had done this before with other realms and they had been devastated into waste.

Raiden spoke in a way that made it seem as though he had lived through countless lifetimes. While his tone often sounded severe, he also spoke with great purpose. “Our next tournament will not be for a few more years. You are one of Earthrealm’s chosen warriors.” Raiden’s lecture was winding down. “Do you have any questions?” You had known much of what Raiden had taught you that day but still sat patiently through it.

“I think I understand. If I have any questions later then I can ask Liu Kang. It’s difficult for me to wrap my mind around this craziness, for lack of a better word. He’s been very patient with me. The idea of arcana and how I’m meant to fight warriors from another world is still wild to me but I understand the concept. I think with time and practice I will be better off.” You stifled a giggle and then cleared your throat to stop any further giggles from escaping.

“Is there something you find funny?”

Guilt again. The kind you’d felt exclusively around your parents.

“You’re the man with the funny hat.” Your cheeks burned when he seemed affronted by your description of him. “I don’t mean to come off as rude! Forgive me. My shop is on the edge of town and there are many travelers passing through. I remember you from one of those visits. You chose your words carefully and spoke very little. You required precious stones and, as I often do, I made polite small talk. I asked what you needed them for and you said in the protection of Earthrealm which you quickly corrected to the protection of nature. You opened my eyes long ago to the secrets of the world though I was doubtful there was any truth to it until now.”

Raiden’s expression shifted and he seemed pleased but he was also difficult to read. You hoped he was pleased. Despite his severe and intimidating presence, he seemed well meaning.

“I don’t recall this instance but am happy to learn that there are those who learn the truth without panic or dismissal.”

“So, I have to fight then.”

“More than fight. You must find your arcana so that you may stand a chance against the warriors of Outworld. They are ruthless and possess skills that may seem impossible to you. Without your arcana you will not stand a chance.”

“How do I do that? Find my arcana, I mean.”

“Through trial and adversity. Everyone is different. Your arcana is unique to you.” Raiden stood and so you did the same. “Your training will begin tomorrow.”

You weren’t sure you were ready for that but you bowed respectfully. That was tomorrow’s problem. “Thank you. I promise to work my hardest.”

Raiden said nothing but didn’t look as though he quite believed you capable. You had long ago stopped seeking the approval of others. Actions spoke louder than words and you would do as you promised. Raiden turned from you without another word. You waited for an awkward moment to be dismissed then turned and left. You chose not to linger in the hall with the pretty lightning sculptures that had distracted you earlier.

The path back to the infirmary wasn’t easily found and you wandered aimlessly for a time before asking a monk to help you back to the infirmary. You were exhausted. Upon arrival you closed the curtain to your tiny room and sat on the edge of your bed. Your arms were aching. You were sore and tired. Gravity didn’t agree with your healing wounds. Training was going to be a bitch but you would be better for it.

Retrieving the journal Liu Kang had given you, you made yourself cozy after rekindling the flame of your lantern. You went over the notes from the day before and smiled. Your handwriting was often sandwiched between his. You’d had a difficult time holding a pen for the first few days and your handwriting was atrocious. There had been times where you’d been too dazed with exhaustion so Liu would take over and explain what he was writing down. He was incredibly considerate.

You drifted to sleep leaning against the wall behind your narrow bed, book in your arms. In your very brief dreams you’d been seated with a young Kung Lao in the field outside of your grandparents’ farm. The more you remembered of him the more you could see the man he’d grown up to be.

A knock against stone startled you awake and you jumped upright. Standing in your doorway, peering through the curtain was Liu Kang. He seemed surprised.

“Did I wake you?” He stepped inside and closed the curtain behind him for privacy. How long had you slept? Crap.

“What time is it? Did I sleep through training?”

“No.” He laughed and it was a welcome and comforting sound. “It’s quite late but I was busy today and had no time until now. I wished to see you before bed.” He spoke of you with such fondness that if you hadn’t been half asleep then you probably would have blushed. You adjusted yourself and made room for him to sit next to you on the bed as you often had while reading. He joined you gratefully. You watched as he brushed his thumb over the prayer beads that often went from wrapped around his wrist to his palm and back again. “Tomorrow is going to be difficult, Y/N.”

You guessed that he would be the one training you. He was one of the only warriors with the marking that stayed in Raiden’s Temple besides Kung Lao that you knew of.

“Promise not to pull any punches, okay?”

“I knew you would say that.” He nudged your shoulder with his.

“I mean it, Liu. It’s been over two weeks since this happened. I’m ready to fight. If I’m going to survive all of this… otherworldly supernatural nonsense then I have no choice. Besides that… I want to do this. I want to fight.”

“I need you to promise to be safe.”

“That’s very sweet, Liu, but I’m a fighter. I’ve been fighting for years. I’m ready to help and more importantly, I’m ready to feel strong again. This thing with the poison and my arms? It’s taken a toll on me. I need to be okay.”

“I understand, I think.” He slipped the beads back around his wrist and caught a glimpse of the journal that you’d fallen asleep holding. Then he looked back toward the door. He was nervous. You could feel it.

“Are you okay, Liu?”

“I’m fine.” He picked up the journal and tapped the pages. “Would you like to study?”

“Can’t sleep, can you?”

“Oh, right. It’s late. I apologize. I woke you. I should let you rest.” He stood, bowed, and then turned to leave. Without thinking, you grabbed his hand. If your arms hadn’t been aching, you would have pulled him back to you. Liu Kang was very aware of the strain that it would put on you to pull so he stopped dead in his tracks. He was always aware of what was going on around him and your aching arms appreciated that more than ever.

“You can stay. We can keep reading. I’d like that.” You insisted. Liu Kang smiled and so you let go of his hand, realizing that you’d been holding it for perhaps too long. He grabbed a hefty book that had been resting beneath your side table. You’d made your way a quarter through it over the past few days. Then you sat together, leaning against the wall. He read to you and his soothing voice nearly lulled you back to sleep. It provided you with a sense of security you hadn’t felt in a long time. Studying with him, even in your worst moments of pain, had become a fond memory.

The words were familiar and so you snapped one eye open. “We already read this.” You waited for a pause in his natural cadence.

“No, we did not.”

“We did, look.” You pointed to your journal and the scribbles in it from the night before. Your handwriting really was terrible. You could make out bits and pieces of it. Liu had the patience of a saint for trying to decipher it. He squinted at the letters.

“I can’t read that. No one can read that, Y/N.” He tapped the page you had pointed to. “That could say almost anything. Are you bored with the history of the Wu Shi Academy?”

“No! We were just further along than this, that’s all. Look, just…” You shoved the journal in front of the book and he laughed. His laugh was sweet and filled with warmth. “I think that this is highlighting this passage here about the foundations and the energy wells beneath it…”

“You can’t possibly read that. We have established that it’s gibberish.”

“I wrote it! I can sort of make out little bits…”

“We have to work on your penmanship, Y/N.”

“I got all sliced up where the tendons and stuff are. They’re still healing!” You whined and then pouted. Liu took the journal and set it on the bed just beyond your feet. You reached past him and turned the pages of the book, searching for the next chapter. “At least get to the part with the arena. You promised that we would learn about that next. You went on and on about it.”

“I did no such thing. You can admit that you’re bored.” Liu teased. You flipped the pages again without his permission so he tried to tug the book away and you jolted to the side with him, hair falling into your face, chopsticks now useless. Much to your surprise, as you righted yourself, Liu helped you and pushed your messy hair away and tucked some of it behind your ear. Your laughter subsided and you avoided his eyes as his admired you. You swore your heart skipped a beat. “Your hair.” He brushed a few strands between his thumb and forefinger.

“Oh?” You dared to look into his dark eyes that were rivers of thought and emotion. You had no aspirations of unraveling them. You liked their mystery.

“The color.”

“Oh, yeah… I uh… I haven’t been able to keep up with dye here and it’s naturally white.” You pointed to the roots that had begun to show.

“White? That’s peculiar.”

“Wow, thanks. Yeah, I know it’s weird.”

“I didn’t mean any offense. It looks nice.” He seemed to realize that his hand was very much still in your hair. His tongue ran nervously over his lower lip while he was lost briefly in thought before he pulled his hand back. “We’ll read about the arena but only because you have chosen to entertain me at a late hour instead of turning me away.”

“And because you realized I was right.” You joked but your stomach was very much in knots. This was no time to be feeling butterflies in your stomach but there they were. Liu Kang made you feel butterflies. Literal butterflies. You hadn’t understood that idiom until now.

“There will be a test, Y/N.” He joked and smoothed out the pages of the book. You retrieved the journal and pen but had given up on writing notes for the night. Your arms were still aching and you were drained. Liu delighted in sharing a map of the ancient arena and reciting battles that he’d won and lost there. His voice was a soothing and familiar drone and before you realized it, you were falling asleep, head falling against his shoulder.

Instead of leaving you there to sleep, Liu Kang continued to read. Sometime later you woke up and the flame in the lantern had gone dim. Liu was still seated next to you, his head now rested atop yours. From his soft, slow breaths, you guessed that he had fallen asleep too. The book was rested neatly on top of your journal as if he had made the decision to put it aside and stay. You should wake him and send him back to his room. He would be more comfortable there. Selfishly, you wanted him to stay. He’d chosen to stay so you decided to let him have his choice.

For the first time since you’d woken up in Raiden’s Temple, you went to sleep feeling secure and comfortable.

Next Chapter >>

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mythicandco · 4 years ago

Text

A Random Rant About Belos (Again)

I have a headache so instead of sleeping to make it go away I’m gonna drink some water and drink some TEARS

(Side note: Belos’ tears taste like pencil shavings and bird crap. Would not recommend.)

Anyways I’m just gonna ramble about the Edward/Philip/Belos/Hunter dynamic for a little while, including my own version of events (which is pretty much shared by eighty-five percent of the fandom) and some stuff that is so obvious but I want to talk about it so that I don’t have to think about it anymore. Why didn’t I just put this into a Google Doc-

Spoilers so everything is under the cut

For the sake of my sanity we’re calling the unnamed Wittebane brother Edward. Edward Carlos Wittebane. Why not, the TOH team can’t prove us wrong for another couple of months so we can do what we want.

Alright, lets start with the relationship between Hunter and Belos. It’s FUCKED UP, people. I am I firm supporter of the Philip = Belos theory (if you couldn’t already tell ;w;) and Hunter being a Grimwalker means that Belos had “the bone of ortet” (EDWARD’S BONES!!) ready for use. WHO KEEPS THEIR BROTHER’S BONES JUST LAYING AROUND?! I mean, Belos does, I guess.

There is no doubt in my mind that Hunter is a Grimwalker. I will be seriously surprised if he doesn’t end up being one. (I’ll be surprised in a good way. But still very surprised.) His reddish-violet eyes, the check mark on the adolescent stage that Belos had in the book, it’s very unlikely he’s writing about a different Grimwalker (oh brain please no). The nose shape of the Grimwalker also matches Hunter’s, which I’m wondering is a coincidence given that Edward’s nose also just happens to be shaped like that. Makes me wonder if Hunter is the first Grimwalker (at least in a very long time), and those are Belos’ notes. It’s not impossible.

Either way the way Belos treats Hunter is not okay. It’s practically unanimous that Belos is a terrible parental figure and is manipulating Hunter in one way or another. Personally I think that he’s mainly keeping Hunter alive for the Day of Unity, and doesn’t care about his feelings as long as he does what’s supposed to get done. Heck, Belos outright says that Hunter can be replaced! Even if he says it’d be a hassle. Still. He doesn’t feel guilty about abusing the poor kiddo and that’s why we see such deepset issues with Hunter’s character.

However there does seem to be a tiny sprinkle of genuine emotions in Belos’ one not-outwardly-violent interaction with Hunter. Unless it’s all completely emotional manipulation and I’m just seeing stars. But while Belos does seem to have little care what happens to Hunter in the long run, he appears to have a slight fondness for the kid. He shares a brief story about the Human Realm, Hunter is the only person we’ve ever seen him take his mask off for, and I think he likes seeing Hunter happy, even if it’s near the bottom of his “Most Important Emperor Things” list. If his ultimate plan for Hunter isn’t “Have a Sacrifice for the Titan” or “Have a Host for the Titan”, then I imagine he’d like to see Hunter make it past the Day of Unity and rule at his side.

What I’m wondering about is what leads Belos to be so terrible to Hunter, the literal CLONE of his brother who, as far as we can tell, he cared about and had a good relationship with? Who knows, maybe the TOH team with throw a huge wrench in our plans and make Edward an abusive brother or something, leading to Belos continuing that cycle by taking it out on Hunter (WHO HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT AT ALL!!). When Hunter finds out, or smol depressed man is gonna have an existential identity crisis and we’re all going to cry. We know we are. Either way, just my thoughts on that big ol’ mess. Everyone in that family has ISSUES. (And insomnia. You’ve all seen Belos’ eye bags, right?)

Now moving onto Edward, Li’l Rascal, and Hunter. (I’m probably gonna call the palisman “Red” more than once, so don’t get confused by that.) If Rascal is the former palisman of Edward, then it makes me wonder how they got that scar over their left eye (wait who else has a scar on the left side of their face that’s right BELOS) (I mean there’s really only two sides of a face that you can put a scar on, but still). It’s possible they got it in the cave-in during the disastrous Titan’s blood mission, but it’s also possible that if we’re taking the abusive brother route that Edward himself inflicted those wounds.

I’m not sure how that would make Red want to be Hunter’s palisman, but I guess it’s possible they sensed Hunter wasn’t as dangerous as he seems. I don’t have much else to say on this subject other than the idea that Rascal was probably gonna become Luz’s palisman until it spotted GG.

And finally an overlook of how Philip become Belos, because once again I believe in Philip is Belos supremacy--

Before continuing read this because it’s written and explained very well and covers a couple of the main options. I’ll wait. I don’t care how long you spend reading it, it’s worth it.

Okay so now that you’ve read that, I’ve narrowed the options down to five.

- Philip pulled a Science Man™ and either drank a potion or had a spell cast on himself so that he could preform magic without the use of glyphs or palismen. Since he’s human, he needs a source to take magic from, and that happens to be palismen. However the longer he goes on, the more “source magic” he needs, and 400+ years later he’s so degraded that he needs palismen just to stay stable, let alone preform magic.

- Philip pulled a slightly different Science Man™ and got himself trapped between realms. Whether it was accidental or Edward or someone else deliberately staged it, that’s up to you, but one way or another the weird black in-between goo slowly erodes away at his human form and, once again, he needs palismen to stay stable.

- Philip got himself cursed the good ol’ fashioned way! Either he angered a witch/demon or opened a magical box that was never supposed to be opened, or maybe the Collector was involved somehow, who knows (The writers know. The creators know. But they’ll never tell us.). The Collector could actually be applied to any of these scenarios with the right context, as seen here.

- The Titan somehow fucked stuff up. I saw this theory floating around a little while ago and it doesn’t seem too unlikely that Belos is only doing what the Titan says so that it will leave him alone. Or maybe he believes that his affliction is the cost of communicating with the Titan, and it’s a price he has to pay in order to stay in power.

- This is the most likely option: the writers sic a whole new idea at us and we love it. I have no idea what that could be, but I’m all up for new stuff I wasn’t expecting!

And thus concludes this almost TED-Talk, now if you don’t mind me I’m going to lay down for a little while and finish drinking my water. Good night/morning/afternoon/evening to you all.

#the owl house spoilers #toh spoilers #toh #the owl house #spoilers #keeping up with the wittebanes #philip wittebane #hunter #the golden guard #hunter the golden guard #little rascal #palisman #grimwalker #the wittebane brothers #speculation #theories #rambling

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pathofcomet · 5 years ago

Text

look at what you taught me

fandom: bridgerton series

pairing: colin/penelope

summary: Colin and Penelope have never been awkward with one another. Except for this one time. (AO3) (book spoiler ahead)

In the beginning, when he travels, Colin can think of nothing else but the present moment: a ship under his feet, the lull of a carriage, the wide expanse of the world all around him. Whatever destination is coming next, if he is certain enough – if not, he’ll just make it up as he goes. The furious scribbling of his quill against paper, as he races to put down in words all his eyes take not but a second to admire. It feels like everything he never knew he wanted to do so desperately. It feels right.

Then, it becomes more difficult to return home, the more he travels. But soon enough, the travel starts to wear him down. He begins to look forward to when he’ll return home: despite his own mother’s incessant remarks, despite the brotherly arguments, despite having to see another sister married off. Even the most loving mamas trying to marry off their daughters to him seem somewhat adorable, if he is gone long enough. But the need to travel comes back, like an itch that won’t go away unless he scratches it away. He makes promises to his sisters – so that he can stay as much as possible, but he goes insane with anything more than a couple of months. He likes to believe that by now his family simply made peace with his many eccentricities, and simply paid the cook more when he was around.

He treasures the pockets of familiarity he gets when in London as much as the breathes of fresh air he gets when he’s away. He imagines he drives his mother wild, with all his coming and going across the continent. He knows what Lady Whistledown writes about him as well, and he’d strangle the woman himself, for alerting everyone of his return so punctually. Ambitious mamas are hard to fend off when you’re a young man, and it only gets worse the older he becomes, because the expectation of marriage dawns ever closer.

***

“You must agree, Colin,” his mother says, and at the mention of his name, he straightens in his chair, because it’s a terrible thing to be singled out in a conversation by Violet. “Penelope is quite an agreeable young lady.”

Colin agrees, both because he truly believes so, and because while his mother doesn’t need his confirmation, she’s kinder when she has it. Benedict, from the other side of the room, leans closer in his chair, so he can hear better whatever commentary their dear mother is about to impart with them.

“I dare say she’d make quite a suitable bride for you, really.”

All hell breaks loose. Benedict drops his foot to the floor with a loud thud, while Colin drops his sandwich, eliciting a swear for which he’s reprimanded by three of his sisters. And then.

“Mother!” Eloise shrieks, quite offended – which Colin finds surprising, considering that the two of them are best friends. “That is entirely too daring!”

Colin agrees, but he is too busy desperately trying to cough away the piece of sandwich stuck in his throat. Eloise, though still quite shocked, pushes her cup of tea in his hands, just to get him to make less noise. He downs it in one go, grateful to not have died of this particular cause. His heart, quite in override still, might provoke a heart attack soon enough if his mother does not change the subject.

“I believe you misremember your ABCs, dear mother,” he jests, because he does not want to take the idea seriously. “There’s one son for whom you haven’t found a bride quite yet.”

Benedict shifts in his seat, suddenly finding his newspaper way more interesting. But this time around, Violet doesn’t rise to the so delicious bait of teasing her second, not when her brain is so set on match-making her third.

“I don’t see why not. Isn’t she a friend to all of us?”

She stops, waits for a nod from each one of her children currently engaged in eaves-dropping on the topic.

“She’s polite, witty,” she continues listing reason after reason, all to which Colin is entirely familiar and now that he thinks about, has noticed himself, several times over, in Penelope. “And quite darling.”

He imagines darling is what girls who aren’t called beautiful get stuck with by kind mothers. He never actually stopped to even consider Penelope in any of these ways: she’s always been there, ever since he was in short pants – and that’s almost already half their lives. A fixed presence by the side of his younger sister, and a favourite of his mother, despite all the awkward wallflower tendencies in Penelope. But he doesn’t recall ever trying to pick apart her character, find her individual traits, even consider her as a… woman.

Colin is suddenly shamed by his wilful, manly indifference. Violet arches her eyebrow at him, clearly still expecting an answer.

“Mother,” he adds with a sigh. “I can promise you most certainly that I am not marrying any time soon.”

“One never knows,” she murmurs, though she allows him his momentary peace, and returns to her embroidery.

***

Only that his mother doesn’t stop with her comments, and they seem to grow in number each time she meets Penelope, which unfortunate for him, is often enough. The next morning, as she returns from shopping, she comments on how nice she looked in a dress of her own picking, and not her mother’s own distasteful choices. Each time any married sibling sends a letter, or comes visit, her efforts in getting Colin to marry are reinforced. She jabs at him with comments: morning, afternoon and evening.

And suddenly, Colin can find that there’s nothing else much that he can think about, but Penelope, and how exactly this insane idea came to live in his mother’s mind. So he starts paying attention.

He supposes parties would be generally more enjoyable if he didn’t have to attend them with his family, as much as he loves them. He can physically feel Violet’s eyes drawing across the room, and then settling, decisively, on his back, a list of eligible ladies for marriage already compiled in her mind, alongside one for dancing partners. Colin can already guess what her mother is about to tell him.

And he is right. She pokes at his elbow with her fan, nodding to the edge of the ballroom, where Penelope Featheringston stands, card empty and looking like she’d rather be anywhere else but here. Well, at least they do have that in common.

“Colin, darling,” and really, that’s all that Mrs. Bridgerton has to say to any of her children for them to do her bidding.

He makes his way across the room, trying his best to avoid getting roped into introductions by mothers or old friends alike. The faster he’s getting this over with, the faster he can return to the appetizers, and to a reconnaissance of the room of his own.

“Pen,” he says, and she startles, turning around to him with the widest of eyes, and the shyest of smiles. Huh, maybe she does look quite darling.

“Colin!” she exclaims, smoothing down a hand over her dress, and while it’s a gesture driven by nerves, it looks quite adorable.

“Would you do me the honour of a dance?”

He extends out his arm, which she takes – an answer without needing one. And it’s quite a shame, to all the other men in the room, because Penelope is a wonderful dancer, and a most attentive conversationalist during them. She asks him of his most recent travels, destination known through the letters he sent to Eloise, most likely. He’s received his fair share of foot stepping and the occasional elbow in his side, but never with Penelope.

She animates with each step, blushing at his hand around her back, smiling at a spin. He never considered how soft her body feels under his fingers, underneath the thin material of her dress, but now he is acutely aware of her warmth seeping through. He asks of the books she’s been reading, which he knows are plenty.

And at the end of the dance, he finds that maybe dancing with Penelope Featherington is not such a tedious task, after all. And at the end of the night, he’s quite certain she’s been his best partner.

***

Art exhibitions are not really Colin’s thing, really. His interest lays in a world painted in words, not in colours. But considering the fact that one of Benedict’s pieces is to be exposed to the world for the first time, of course his entire family must be present. He is proud of his brother, for having found a path in life, having chased it so full of determination.

Colin’s good at chasing as well. He’s just been proven, more and more lately, that he chases only things that cannot last, which displeases him greatly. It doesn’t mean he is not entirely supportive of his older brother. What other reason he’d have to be present here, at all?

“Penelope!” Eloise shouts, gathering the attention of her friend.

Penelope spins around, red curls jumping with the movement, and she blushes. Colin is pretty sure she’s done this every single time he’s seen her, though maybe he now begins to understand why. She nods her head in their direction, all Bridgertons replying in kind. Eloise lets go of his arm, rushing instead by her best friend’s side, hands entangled in a most obvious display of friendship and affection.

Colin knows Penelope’s family – and so he knows there’s no such camaraderie between her and her sisters, as it can be so easily observed between himself and his own siblings. He’s glad these two have each other then: a friend is one’s most fearful champion.

He walks by his mother’s side, going through the gallery, the two girls just a few feet ahead. Eloise is the taller one, yet both their heads are bent together as they discuss, such an air of ease and comfort about them. His sister says something, and suddenly Penelope turns a bit more to the side, laughing: a sparkle of mischief in her eyes and the loveliest pull at her mouth. Now, Colin finds himself quite taken with her mouth, staring because he finds it impossible not to. The soft pink of her lips, as she’s worried at them trying to come up with a comment about this and that painting. The white of her teeth, as she smiles. Her tongue, wetting her lips, from time to time, as the rooms grow hotter, with all the people passing around.

He’s lucky that the art pieces all around are distracting enough that Penelope herself doesn’t notice. His mother does, though.

“Quite darling, no?”

And she looks at the exact same person that he is, and most certainly not at the painting of a fruit basket in front of them.

“Mother,” he warns, a slight squeeze around her arm.

“Oh,” she sighs. “You can’t blame me for caring enough to try.”

Maybe not. But he can blame her for opening his eyes to something that he, like everyone else – he begins to realize - didn’t really know was right there.

***

So Colin Bridgerton, like a true hero of his days, leaves for Wales. And like the caring gentleman that he also is, he uses one of his friends as his excuse. It helps – it’s quite a useful distraction, for a while, walking over the hills, staring out at the sea, spending evenings eating hearty meals with someone that knows him well enough, but not too much. And he writes in his journal, of his quiet passing days.

By contrast, the nights are not so quiet. While he tries so hard to forget the society back in London, at night there are no distractions: and even so, while asleep, he cannot really control his unconscious mind.

So Colin dreams: at first, the most innocent of shadows, people that he can vaguely make out. Then the visions get clearer, and longer, and more tormenting. It starts with Penelope’s smile, and that mouth of hers, which in a dream he can admit to wanting to desperately kiss. Which, in a dream, he has leave to do. He knows, upon waking, that whatever taste lingers on his tongue from his haze, it certainly has nothing on the reality, and hates himself all the more for it. Then her body, close to his, the press of her bosom hard against his chest, the roundness of her bottom in his palms. The next morning, he is in need of a change of bedsheets, like he is nothing but a horny teenager.

He is sure his mother must have cursed him. The dreams continue, sweet haunting that only makes the guilt rise in his throat. She’s his sister’s best friend, for heaven’s sake, and here he is, conjuring her up in his dreams with no respite! It’s like his body has decided to take an entirely different path from his mind.

Colin is miserable on a travel, for the first time in way too long.

***

Maybe that’s his excuse. He lacks sleep, and for him, the most pressing issue is, obviously, still the one of his marriage. Violet Bridgerton is popular for many things between her children, but her cutting words and sharp mind are not necessarily one of those, especially if used against one of them. Colin has found himself at the receiving end of exactly that for weeks and months now, so he is apprehensive when he is summoned back to London.

But if his mother has need of him, then he must make haste. Of course, the real reason is simply the news of Daphne’s new pregnancy, which is incredibly happy. Colin loves to be an uncle way better than he likes being a younger brother.

Especially since right now, Anthony and Benedict have taken the liberty to pick up with the teasing where their mother stopped.

“You left in the middle of the season,” Benedict remarks, and Anthony clasps his back in a way that only eldest brothers can do, when they require an immediate answer.

“Oh, very well,” and Colin actually scowls. “I needed to get away. Mother has been incessant with this bloody marriage thing.”

And because they’re his brothers, of course they joke and jest more, at his own expense. Everyone in their house knows that his mother has her eyes set on Penelope, and everyone in their house is already tired of her insinuations, Colin most of all. That doesn’t mean that Anthony, or Benedict are going to pass up the opportunity to rile him up on the subject. It’s been a while, after all, since they’ve had reason to laugh at him in particular.

It’s the damn lack of sleep, and all of these comments, which are entirely unwarranted and so overwhelming, despite his protests, that make him throw all decorum out the window.

“I am not going to marry soon, and I am certainly not going to marry Penelope Featherington!”

“Oh!”

The softest sound, really – feminine and delicate and belonging to the single person that he didn’t want to see right this moment. With much slowness, burning red with shame, Colin turns around to look at Penelope Featherington. And he knows: by the expression on her face, the haggard breathing with the desperate rise and fall of her chest, and her eyes, that he just broke her heart.

What he says right there on the spot, he cannot truly recall. A fumbling of stupid, empty nothings, apology too small, too unfulfilling, because Penelope draws herself up and protects the little bit of her dignity left.

And she leaves, so fast that he doesn’t have the time to do what he wants: follow her to clear up things.

Benedict punches him in the arm, quite terribly hard. It still doesn’t feel as bad as the gut-wrenching guilt building up inside himself, or the self-loathe that he so much deserves. Because just as he was beginning to make up his mind regarding how dear, truly, she has grown to be for him, he has done the worst thing a person who cares about another can do: hurt her.

***

He shows up at the doorsteps of her house the following day, surprised to find Penelope alone in the drawing room.

“As you might suspect, Mr. Bridgerton,” she says, when he inquires after her mother and sisters. “Many men before you have made the same declaration, though maybe in more private settings. I am afraid any hope of marriage left in this household falls upon my sisters.”

It is the fact that she doesn’t use his name that stings the worst, and makes him understand exactly how much harm he’s done with his extremely horrifying comment.

“Penelope, I am so entirely sorry for the way I behaved yesterday. You must believe me when I say I did not mean to offend you in any way.”

“Must I?”

He stops, opens his mouth: no words come out. She looks the picture perfect of peace, and maybe this is what should worry him the most. It is his first time seeing her as more than a blushing young woman, and suddenly maybe he realizes why she is Eloise’s best friend: she’s made of tougher stuff than what he’s been led to believe so far.

“What I said, the way I’ve said it. I’ve hurt you… It’s entirely intolerable and I apologize for the situation you’ve been put in because of me being an ass.”

Situation that she handled entirely fine, given the fact that he so singled her out in a market of numerous others undesirable young ladies. She sighs at his curse, something that sounds like Colin, that has the tiniest of fondness in the tone. Something in his chest tightens with fondness of its own, for this woman in front of him, who has been nothing but a most beloved friend, to his entire family – and to him, as well.

“I…” she stops, taking in a deep breath, her hands shaking. “I already told you, no feelings were hurt. You’ve made no remark that wasn’t already obvious to everybody in the ton,” she says, and she waves in the air the latest number of Lady Whistledown.

Of course, even when he misses it, his sisters and his dear mama are quick to fill him up on the happenings of the season. In today’s fresh paper, Whistledown has written down that were the two of them ever to get married, she’d have to give up writing altogether – such an unfitting match never having been seen before.

“You can’t possibly believe those writings,” he says, suddenly offended at the paper, though he’s not quite certain on whose behalf anymore.

“I didn’t, until –”

Until he has reinforced them all the more, with his declaration. Colin suddenly feels himself flush from head to toes, at being so openly chastised. His brother Benedict has already told him, that he has cruelly overstepped most demands of polite society when he lost his temper in that way, in such a public place.

“I really do apologize, Penelope.”

He hadn’t realize how much he enjoys saying her name until now, when he so desperately wants her, needs her to say his own. A sign that things between them can be mended, move from the terrible awkwardness between them.

“Pity doesn’t feel that nice to those who already know how pitiful they are, Colin.” His gaze snaps up at her, and finds her already smiling at him – quite charming, even if so utterly self-depreciating. “Though you are forgiven.”

He bows at her in thanks, lower than he’s gone in months, if not years, just to show how entirely grateful he is. Of course, Colin is yet too young, rich, handsome and charismatic to know the meaning of her words, and too stupid of a man to try and understand where she is coming from.

But he will, in due time.

For now, maybe his favourite sight to see during his travels becomes the shores of England, when returning home. Because home has just started to mean just a tiny bit more.

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