#it's almost been a month since these freaks invaded my mind and now here we are

[kristoffs-lullaby]

thrilled to draw varian carrying hugo because it's correct in every way. me and my friend have this hc that since hugo is white as shit, he's one of those that bruises really easy. so like a quarter of the bruises varian sees (in the top right) aren't even from the fight it's from him bumping into a bush or something

[besthimbomachine]

my love when it counted. 11

summary: Things settle into a weird new normalcy between you and Kenny, one he isn't fully happy with, but is still too much of a coward to back out of. So he just lets it continue, and tries to enjoy what time he has with you. Though, one day, while watching one of your matches, he is forced into a heavy revelation. One that only grows heavier when you get hurt, and he goes to visit you at your home for the first time. pairing: kenny omega x reader word count: 8163 warning: blood and vague descriptions of violence, angst and smut (light choking, unprotected piv, creampie) if last chapter was francesca and take me to church, this one is movement and nfwmb. anyways, we are approaching the end here, start saying your goodbyes cause we getting to the final part after this. aside from that, this chapter is a lot. multiple things happen, and I even found space to sneak in a smut scene. but yeah, kenny is back to his bullshit and back to his suffering and maybe just maybe managing to learn something important along the way

11.

Hurried steps echoed through the backstage murmurs, only growing more rushed as Kenny clearly heard your music hit. Shit, he didn’t want to miss your entrance, but he had taken too much time getting himself back together after his own match. Quickly, he made his path through the halls and up the stairs. He was just getting to the one empty skybox he was going to be watching your fight from as the familiar crescendo of the beat hit his ears. The minute he opened the door, Kenny heard the booming cheers of the crowd. His large stride covered the space to the balcony in moments, eyes catching you on the screens above the ring before he even saw Nick already sitting there.

“Where’s Matt?” Kenny asked, not even looking to the side, blue eyes trailed on your image displayed in the middle of the stadium as you made your entrance.

“Had something to solve, so he is watching from downstairs,” Nick replied with a shrug, throwing a popcorn in his mouth as his foot tapped to the music, Kenny’s thumb doing the same as he rested on the railing. “Excited for whatever insane shit she does today?”

From the corner of his eye he saw Nick smile, and it seemed almost devious, that smile echoing in his voice. Kenny didn’t really answer, just nod as he silently mouthed the lyrics to your music as it died down. Looking down, he felt a tinge of fear slowly creep into his spine at the sight of metal contraption below. It was a cage match, and as excited as he was to watch you fight, there was still something in him that was afraid. He knew you - he knew you very well - and he knew that for you, a cage was just a big trampoline.

It had been a while since Kenny really felt scared of whatever move you tried on your fights. But this one was different, that creeping fear of just what insane bullshit you’d pull trying to invade his mind for a couple of weeks now, ever since the match was announced. At first, it would only pop up when he thought of the damn cage, but the thing was insistent and it’d pry into his head at the most inopportune moments. A week back, he felt it slithering into his brain just as he held your sleeping form in his arms, dragging his eyes to the scars on your back and making his fingers feel ice cold. It dared disturb what little moment of peace he had - though, he had to say, at least it was giving his brain something new to freak out about. 

Something that just wasn’t about what your situation was.

A couple of months had passed since your fateful visit to his house, and in that time, Kenny had been a bit of a coward. He’d be the first to admit it. By a mix of interest and inaction, he got himself in a hole he felt he was only digging deeper into. After that first hook up, he let you take the lead, getting himself roped in a casual thing that wasn’t exactly what he wanted, but was the best he could have right now. At first, he was sure he could just do it, easy - or at least that’s what he told himself. But as time passed, things were getting less easy, a quiet discomfort settling into his bones. He couldn’t feel it every day, only here and there, but on lonely nights it usually appeared, poisoning his mind and reigniting the storm in his heart.

It wasn’t your fault, he knew it wasn’t. Kenny had entered the situation willingly, accepted the terms and went along with the game. Now he couldn’t complain. And he wouldn’t, not when he would have you in his arms almost every other week. It was a coin flip, really, but there was always about a fifty percent chance he wouldn’t have to sleep alone in his hotel room, at least for one night. Besides, sex was great, and the company was better, so he really had no right to complain. And he had learned to live with it, so long as he didn’t think about what was going on when the coin didn’t land on his side.

But aside from that, things remained the same - or about as much the same as they could. You were still friends, still spending time together when you had to travel for a show, still preparing together every now and again, still eating and traveling along with Matt and Nick and all of that. Although, while one brother had mercifully spared you from any judging stares, the other hadn’t been showing Kenny the same generosity. But Matt couldn’t do anything, so for now the routine continued. Travels, hotel breakfasts, dinner after the show, and of course, watching your matches. Even the ones where he felt ice creep under his skin at every big move.

The loud crowd cheered and Kenny heard Nick cheer behind him too. Not even fifteen minutes into the match and you had drawn blood from your opponent. You were ramping up the violence fast. There was something about the cage that lured out the animal in you. He could see it in how your eyes reflected on the screen. Feel it in the way you moved, a bloody hand slicking your tousled hair back, its bandaged twin wrapped in barbed wire. You looked to the side, face turning directly to the camera for a second, and Kenny felt like you were looking straight into his eyes. His breath caught in his throat and was only freed when you turned around and ran forward again.

The match continued and soon you too started to bleed. There was crimson smeared on your chest and spilling down your face, the thick liquid pooling on your lips like honey, slowly leaking down your chin. It dripped on your gear, staining the leather red, blood and sweat mixing on the corners where the thick fabric dug into your skin. You broke out of a pin at a two, opponent crashing back on the ring in exhaustion and disbelief as the camera zoomed on your face. The screen filled with your image as your lips curled, your smile a devilish baring of teeth as your tongue slipped out, licking the blood from your plump lips.

Never had your time together in New Japan felt further than now. You were nothing like this before. Sure, you had always been a thrill seeker, enamored with the rush of the fight, but not like this. The person moving on the screen before him was more beast than woman. Not that Kenny disliked it. No, he loved it. You were the picture of a wild thing, untamed and free in its brutality. An ancient god covered in blood, beautiful in its bestial horror. The years apart had changed you into someone different, and Kenny loved that person. To him, you were the most gorgeous thing, and even the sight of your bloodied smile had his pants suddenly feeling tight.

Kenny knew he should sit down, but he just couldn’t, torso leaning into the metal railing as his eyes never left the screen. The match went on and he could only imagine how well you were seeing with the blood spilling down your eyes, hair sticking to your beautiful face. Still you pushed on, gaining ground, getting bolder - just as Kenny got more anxious. If this match went beyond forty minutes, he’d probably implode.

Just as the thought crossed his mind, you made a run for the top rope, gaining momentum as you made it to the turnbuckle before throwing yourself high into the air. Your body twisting as it drew an arched path up and across the ring. Though, just as you were about to land, your opponent rolled to the side from her spot down on the ground, your body hurdling to the hard ring floor. Kenny winced as he heard Nick hiss, foot hitting the hard concrete below them.

“Shit, that was unnecessary,” he grunted, eyes still following your movements as you got up, taking a blow from behind just as you got to your feet.

“What? That was cool,” Nick cried in almost disbelief, leaning forward in his chair and throwing a popcorn in Kenny’s direction. “Unlucky, but cool,” he added when Kenny glanced to the side for a second before looking forward again, just in time to see you manage to recover.

“That was reckless,” Kenny retorted in a strained voice, watching you trading blows in the middle of the ring, fighting hard to regain your ground. “Come on, she is risking too much, especially with all that bleeding t-”

“You know she’d hate to hear you saying that,” Nick cuts Kenny off in the most somber voice he’d ever heard from the man. “You don’t think she is good enough?”

Nick’s words touched Kenny’s ears like a butcher’s knife to tender flesh. A clean, merciless cut. It froze him to the core. More than that, it also felt like a threat, quiet rage spilling through his friend’s voice, in a way eerily uncommon. When Kenny turned around, he found Nick’s gaze on him, somber aggression shadowing his eyes, and a judgment that felt worse than Matt’s ever did. The moment feels like it’s suspended in time, his knees almost buckling under the weight of that heavy stare. And then he remembers, Nick had always been close to you, if there was somebody out there who knew all the ways Kenny wronged you, that would be him. And he’d be primed to notice Kenny slipping up again.

It hurts. Kenny knows Nick is right, and it hurts. The truth burns him, wide eyes glued on his friend’s somber ones, yeah, he deserved the quiet rage. Then he remembers something else, he remembers you, saying those same words when he went to see you after a match, not too long before you left. ‘You don’t think I’m good enough?’ Kenny had gone to check on you, worried about your state, he was scared of you getting seriously injured, deeply terrified of something bad happening to you. He couldn’t understand why you were enraged when he talked, why you wouldn’t just comprehend that he cared and he wanted to help. Why you wouldn’t just take his advice, when all he wanted was to see you well. He was afraid, and he ended up letting that push you away. 

He was acting on his fear back then, and he was doing the same thing now, too.

A loud cheer erupted from the crowd, breaking the bubble they had been trapped in. Two pairs of eyes turned back to the screen, both men catching the end of your finisher, just in time to see you take your opponent to a pin. The sight has Nick coming to his feet fast, both Kenny and him voicing a strangled yes under their breaths. The count starts, and it seems so long, but just as they were both about to commemorate, it stops, your opponent kicking out almost the third hit, Nick and Kenny once again matching in a chorus of frustrate grunts.

You don’t let up and the match continues, now turning into a struggle, a test of resilience for both sides. For a brief second you leave an opening and your opponent capitalizes, having just returned from the almost pin. She delivers a kick that sends you flying over the hopes, back hitting the cage wall before you fall to the hard floor. Nick winces and Kenny follows suit, but it’s not for long. You come back up with a renewed fire, rage burning bright and making you turn the next few minutes in an unbarred beat down, until you are standing before your exhausted opponent laid on a table. Kenny knows it can only mean one thing.

It all happens in a flash, you run to the corner, propelling yourself up from the top rope so you can jump to the cage wall and climb to the top. It’s like Kenny blinks and you are already standing at the edge of the metal structure, looking down at the ring below. You look small, standing over the large space, floodlights drowning your form. His stomach drops, anxiety creeping into his spine, but in a second it’s gone. You leap, and it’s like all goes quiet for a moment, both Nick and Kenny leaning forward in anticipation. Like the world stands still and there is only you, spinning in mid air for an eternity, defying gravity’s attempts to pull you to the ground below. 

You are almost glowing, and Kenny remembers something else. He remembers the first time he saw you - the first time he noticed you, that heart stopping moment that burned your existence forever into his mind. You were taking a leap, much like this one, body floating in midair almost as if weightless. You were wild, free and unafraid, and something in that fearlessness captivated him. So when did he let his fear convince him that caging you would be for your own good?

These long few seconds finally end as the crowd erupts in a booming cheer, Kenny and Nick following along as your landing hits perfectly, bringing your opponent crashing through the table. In a moment you recover from the crash and make it to the pin again, and this time it goes down to the count of three. The bell rings and Kenny’s smile couldn’t be bigger if he wanted to, body frozen in awe and joy as he watches you standing bloodied but victorious.  Nick throws an arm over him, bringing them close together, breaking the tension away from his body.

“See? I told you had nothing to worry about,” Nick says over the loud cheers.

“Yeah,” Kenny replies, finally relaxing against the metal railing, laughing softly as he looked back at Nick, “I was just being a scared idiot. And that was fucking beautiful.”

You make your exit and just as your music dies down, both men start making their way to the backstage again. Kenny wanted to be there for you when you returned, bloodied and glorious, his heart still racing in his chest after that match. In a perfect world he’d get to hold you in his arms, kiss your lips despite the blood, and then be the one to clean it from your face. But this was not a perfect world, all he could do was congratulate you like a friend. To tell you how great you were and how beautiful the match had been - and hope he could make up for at least a fraction of the times he didn’t tell you all that.

Before they could get to where your locker room was, they found Matt, who stopped both Kenny and Nick in their tracks by saying you had actually gone to see the doctor. There it was, the taste of fear again, rising to his mouth like bile in his throat. It was sickening. But before Kenny could react, Matt insisted that it was nothing too bad. You had dislocated your knee cap, painful but not dangerous, and something all three men knew you’d been through before. Otherwise, you had just scattered cuts that needed tending, but you were mostly unscathed. Kenny felt a sigh of relief escape his lips, it was terrible to see you in pain, but he knew this much wouldn’t take you down.

Together, the three made their way to you, moving through the corridors until they found the door they were looking for at the end of a hallway. It was open, Kenny could already hear voices from the inside, your warm laughter hitting his ears and calming his heart. But the soft moment was cut when he heard something else, a booming voice he knew all too well, followed by a laughter that almost felt mocking to him. He could try to ignore it, pretend it wasn’t there and move forward just to see you, but then he saw a figure passing by the open door. It was Adam. Finding a poor explanation, Kenny excused himself, letting the brothers go on by themselves, feeling Nick’s eyes burning on him as he left.

Kenny knew he had been a coward by just bailing out, he knew he shouldn’t have done that, and still he did. But the thing was, he really didn’t want to be around Adam right now, not when you were in the same room as well. He was still tender from all the thoughts and memories that he’d gone through near the end of your match and he didn’t think he was strong enough. So he left, turning back and regretting his weakness at the same instant. Minutes later, he sent a text to Matt, asking him to let Kenny know when you’d be leaving for your locker room. And now he stood at your door, an ice pack in his hand as a peace offering, a gesture done more to appease his mind than anything else.

You make your way to your locker room limping and exhausted, whole body screaming. The knee was more annoying than anything else, but your back was killing you, and the ice pack you were holding to it wasn’t helping that much. The old pain refused to leave you like some sort of clingy ghost. You had won but fuck, you really felt beaten, you could use a hot shower. The moment you turn the corner to your locker room, though, you are suddenly shaken out of your pity party. Standing by the side of the door, staring straight back at you, was Kenny, an ice pack of his own in hand and a sheepish smile on his face.

“Hey,” he says in an almost awkward tone and you have to bite back a chuckle, “came to check on you, see if I could be of help,” his eyes feel soft as he speaks, hand lifting the ice pack so you could see it.

“I got one already,” you lift your hand from your back, showing the pack in your hand to him. Your words come almost without thought, like a robot responding on auto pilot, something deep in you bringing back bad memories before you shook your head to scatter them away. “But thanks, I appreciate the thought,” you smile this time, trying to believe in the softness you see in his eyes, opening the door and gesturing for him to follow you inside.

“Well, one more won’t hurt,” he adds as you shut the door behind the both of you, blue eyes following your form as you crash on the bench in front of him. “Heard from Matt you got hurt, how you doing?”

You close your eyes with a heavy sigh, too tired to even properly think, but your brain still processing the pain rattling through your bones. Kenny’s quiet and gentle tone comes almost like a cress to your ears. There was a time where having him in your locker room after a match meant you’d only get more tired - but for a wholly different reason. And then, there was a time this same scenario would only end in rage and anguish for you. You shook your head, this was neither of these times, and the man standing before you spoke in such soft tones and he didn’t even seem like that same person.

“Some cuts and bruises here and there,” you respond, touching the large adhesive bandage covering the long gash in your forehead, fingers littered in small scrapes from the barbed wire. “A bruised ego from not getting a pin from my own finisher,” you laugh, and Kenny follows along, making you feel more at ease to look him in the eyes and truly count your losses. “And a dislocated knee cap, again. But it’s like I get one of these every other year, so it’s not too bad. Though, my back hurts like hell. Not that there's anything wrong with it just, some injuries never really leave you, you know how it is.”

Your words are quiet, a sad smile playing on your face as you shrug, eyes falling to the floor. You pull down your knee pad to reveal the swollen and hurting joint, placing the ice pack on it with a hiss. You knew you looked almost destroyed, and you knew Kenny could see it clearly. Not only in the swollen knee, but in the multiple scrapes on your body, and the few scattered bruises that were probably darkening already. Beyond that, there was still blood on your hair, red staining your gear and some spots on your body. You won, but you still looked like a mess, a glorious mess but a tired one nonetheless.

“If it’s any consolation,” he spoke softly, and at the same time you felt a cold touch bringing relief to your tired back, Kenny dropping to sit by your side on the bench, “you were great. Really, that match was just fantastic.”

Kenny smiled, blue eyes shining as one hand held the ice pack to your back, held against the point on your spine where the longest scar was. Exactly the spot that was hurting the most. His other hand came to brush away a strand of hair from your face, blood still smeared over it. For a moment you felt your breath hitch, heart stopping as the ocean in his gaze drowned you in. When his fingers left your face, you broke away from his eyes, your gaze falling to the side as you laughed softly, his words warming your tired body.

“Thanks, at least that means my knee’s sacrifice was worth it, then,” you smiled back at him, chuckling as you spoke, still not brave enough to return your eyes to his deep blue gaze.

“When did you dislocate it?”

He asks calmly, but you still feel a shiver run down your spine, body reacting on muscle memory, mind suddenly jumping on alert. You remember how it would go, you remember it far too well. He was always worried, always scared, always just wanting what was best for you. And you wondered if he considered what you wanted, what you needed. You wondered if he ever considered that maybe you knew what you were doing, that you were good at what you did. The sting of the memory hurts more than it should and you try to push it away. You are a different person, even if he wanted to, he couldn’t do that to you now.

“What,” you laugh, and it feels wrong even to your ears, a dark and raspy sound ringing through gritted teeth as your tense eyes lock with his own. And you almost feel like Kenny cowers back at the stare. “You gonna chastise me for it if I tell you?”

“No,” he responds, voice almost small as he shakes his head.

“If you do, I'm gonna break your teeth in,” you point a finger at him, the threat coming with a smile and a chuckle that are only half true.

“Fair,” he snickers, lifting his free hand to scratch at the back of his neck as he laughs, “but I’m not planning to.”

You stare at him for a second, but Kenny doesn’t budge, blue eyes trailed on your own, smile seeming soft and genuine. It’s strange, but he has been showing that he changed, so you give him the benefit of the doubt. With a heavy sigh, you rest your torso on your free hand, fingers digging into the edge of the bench as you remember that exact unlucky moment.

“Remember that failed pin after my finisher? Well, after that, she kicked me straight to the damn cage. The fall wasn’t high, but it was still garbage, the moment I hit the ground I knew my knee was out of place again,” the words leave your lips and your eyes look deep into his own, searching for that well known judgment, but you find it nowhere, only a pained softening as you describe what happened.

“Shit,” he shoots back and you almost laugh at the simple reaction, “but honestly, I wasn’t able to tell from just watching. And that last jump was gorgeous anyway, it actually sounds even more amazing now,” Kenny’s eyes shine as he laughs softly and you feel your fears melting away, his presence bringing a strange comfort.“You think you are gonna have to stay away long?”

“Nah,” you shrug, despite the movement flaring up the pain in your back, “I didn’t have anything booked for the next two weeks, they’ll probably give me another one and I should be back with a bunch of tape and a brace on that knee after that.”

“I’m happy to know that,” Kenny’s lips curl into a wide smile, his eyes shining softly and you feel a gentle warmth rising to your chest, blood rushing to your face.

“Well, Kenny, thank you for your worry, really,” you respond, pushing yourself up too quickly for your pained knee, but still hiding the wince as you stand proudly. “Now, it’s not that I want to kick you out, but I really need a shower. I got blood drying between my tits, it’s really not nice.”

He laughs at your words but still takes his leave, laying his hand on your shoulder before he goes, its warmth spreading through your skin as he praises you again. When the door closes behind him, you huff out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, fighting to get a hold of yourself. That was getting too mushy for comfort. God, you really needed that shower now.

Kenny grunts as your soft lips crashed on his own in a sloppy flurry, tongues dancing together as he pulled your bodies close. You were sitting on top of him, hands bracing your weight on his naked chest as your legs straddled his hips. Kenny’s hands travel from below your top down to the exposed skin of your hips and thighs, savoring the feeling of your soft skin under his thick fingers. God, you felt so good, so right. When you rub your wet pussy against the large bulge in his pants, he breaks away from the kiss with a gasp, wondering for half a second if your wetness would stain his jeans. Somehow, the thought only got harder.

Shit, sometimes he really felt like an animal around you.

Kenny hadn’t even had the chance to take off his pants when you two crashed on the bed. He had come to visit you in your house nearly two weeks after you’d gotten hurt in that cage match. But almost as soon as he arrived, you both were already clashing together in a needy mix of mouths and hands and erotic touches. You dragged him to the bedroom and although this wasn’t the original purpose of his visit, he wasn’t about to say no. He had forgotten how you got horny when you were bored. And you could get really bored when you couldn’t fight.

With one hand, Kenny opened his pants, freeing his aching erection from the tight confine of his pants. The moment his cock was out, you rubbed your pussy against it, smearing his sensitive length in your wetness as he groaned. One of his hands smacked your ass for teasing him, but he loved every second of it. Bringing his lips back to your own, Kenny took hold of your hips, fingers digging into your flesh as he aligned himself with your entrance before pulling you down in one fluid motion.

You both moan, lips still barely touching each other in a messy dance. You slide all the way down until he is buried balls deep within you, and Kenny holds you there for a second, completely lost in pleasure. When you start to move, he grunts into your lips, one hand going to the back of your neck to pull you further into the kiss. It feels sinful and holy how your body fits so perfectly on his, your arms over his shoulders keeping him close - oh, if only you knew how he never wanted to be away.

The bouncing of your body up and down his cock has his mind reeling. The way your pussy tightens against his hard shaft every time your ass slams against his legs brings him to the edge of madness. You move in sync, tongues and hands and hips in an erotic harmony. Bodies already used to the map of each other’s shape. Like an old road leading home, one he could traverse with closed eyes. And one he never wants to leave.

One of his hands travels up your body, pulling down the strap of your top, revealing the tender skin of your breast. He digs his fingers into your pliable flesh, in ecstasy at how soft it feels under his rough digits. Kenny teases your nipple and you moan, sound silenced by his hungry mouth. He bites into your lower lip, feeling you tighten around his cock, his whole body shaking with a shudder in response. When he is satisfied, he moves his hand from your chest to your neck, long fingers circling it from side to side. He can feel you shiver, mouth leaving yours to lay a kiss on your shoulder as his digits tighten against your pulse.

A gasp escapes your lips in response, movements stuttering, and the hand on your ass holds you in a firm grasp as Kenny starts moving you up and down his cock. You almost feel weightless, like a doll in his strong arms, he makes it seem easy to hold someone as heavy as yourself. You take it, breathlessly holding onto his shoulders for support as he aids your movements, his other hand constricting your neck only just enough. It’s like everything is becoming too much, his kisses on your shoulder, his cock slamming on your quivering pussy, the large hand digging into your pulse. You can feel the coil within you tightening more and more.

Just as you manage to pick up the movement of your hips on your own again, Kenny’s hand flies to your pussy, deft fingers finding your sensitive clit. Shit, you are sure he is gonna break you down like that, but you don’t really mind. He is throbbing within you, grunting and moaning as you clench around his length. You start to feel breathless, your hard grip around his shoulders loosening, and that’s when his fingers let go of your pulse. Air rushes into your lungs just as his mouth finds your neck, and that’s when he starts hammering his hips against you, one arm now resting on the bed for support.

“That’s it, come on, let go,” he murmurs against your neck in encouragement and it only brings you closer to the edge. “I got you.”

His voice sends a shiver down your spine, making your pussy tremble and throb. You want to scream, but the sound that comes out is no more than a whine as you bury your face in his shoulder, the movement of his fingers on your clit becoming too much. When Kenny digs his teeth into your neck, you shudder, stars covering your vision, body going limp against him. But he keeps to what he just said, holding you with a thick, powerful arm as his hips hammer into your own, riding your orgasm as you shake around him.

Kenny feels close, so fucking close he can taste it, cock throbbing wildly inside you. He is moving you up and down, slamming his hips into your own, chasing his high as you lay breathless on his chest. Your hands run lovingly over his arms and back, a gentle caress to his tense muscles. He feels you laying warm kisses on his left shoulder, the same one that has been giving him so much trouble that he needs it wrapped in tape almost every other match. But you still kiss it softly and adoringly, just the tenderness of the touch driving closer to his breaking point.

His movements grow faster and more erratic and you start moaning in a weak tone every time he bottoms you out. The sweet sound is too much for him, the coil in his gut snapping as he sees white. Kenny pulls you down, holding your hips firm against his own as his cock throbs, shooting thick ropes of cum deep inside your soft, warm pussy. He is breathless himself, arms trembling as he paints your insides white, a bliss so powerful he almost feels undeserving of it. Kenny pulls you by your hair gently, lips finding yours again as he rolls you both, laying your body down on the bed with a kiss as he pulls out.

For a minute, his lips still stay on yours, the kiss is soft and sweet as his large hands caress your face. When your mouths part, your eyes meet each other, both held in a deep, powerful gaze for a long moment as you both feel breathless. Kenny feels his heart stuttering and the air choking in his throat. That’s when he pulls away, laying down in exhaustion. You two stay like that for a second, laying on the bed as you recover your breath, your hand caressing his arm as you murmur something soft to him. All he can feel is the overwhelming weight of the emotions he fights to hide.

When you get up to go to the en suite bathroom, finding your lost pants on the floor of the bedroom, he just stays laying down for a moment. Looking around, he takes in the place, a gentle green painting the walls and the bright sunlight filtering through your warm windows. There were illustrations hanging from the walls, posters and other such things. Your bedroom was large and beautiful, and it smelled like sweet scented candles. 

Looking to the other side he sees the closed door to the bathroom, and by it an open door leading to a closet. He can see some of your gear, the leather and chains recognizable from afar. And then something strikes him, a pain shooting into his gut like a knife when his eyes see something hanging in a corner on the far wall. A jacket, but not one of your own, although he can still recognize it, and it has his blood freezing in fear. That was Adam’s jacket.

You leave the bathroom fully dressed and Kenny snaps out of his own mind, eyes finding your soft smile, his heart almost forgetting why he was so terrified. Getting up, he picks up his shirt from the floor and goes to get cleaned and to give himself a moment to push that sudden terror and pain to the back of his mind. He was here now with you, that was all that mattered. When he leaves the bathroom, he finds you waiting for him by the bedroom door, a soft hand bringing his face down to your own when he approaches. The kiss washes over him like a blessing, sunlight shining into his mind and scattering his fears. And fuck, he had already fallen beyond the point of no return.

You leave the bedroom together, as you lead him by the hand, only letting go when you get to the living room, telling Kenny he could wait as you went to the kitchen to get the food. Walking around, he could finally get a good look at the place. When he arrived, you two were so fast to just jump on each other that he didn’t have much time before you both ended up in the bedroom. Not that he was complaining, but he was happy to be able to fully take in the place. He had never been at your home before, despite how he had been to Matt’s and even Nick’s homes multiple times, and how you lived relatively close to them both. It was weird thinking back now, noticing how far you were despite being so near.

Your home was beautiful, the warm sun shining through the large windows making it seem dreamy. The living room was decorated in earth colors, a few plants breaking the dominant hue with their green. The whole place smelled like coffee, sweet and deep and it reminded him of you. Through the wall he saw posters, paintings and photos, sharing the space with the occasional hanging plant, thick vines dropping to the floor, heavy with large leaves. 

As his eyes traveled, Kenny spotted something else. In a corner on the wall, only gently touched by the sun, stood a tall bookshelf, all black metal and dark wood. Though, it wasn’t its design that caught his eye. The shelves were littered with various pictures and wrestling memorabilia, and even before his feet carried you there, he already knew they all related to you. Like scattered shards of a life he didn’t witness, they shone under the sun, the only remnants of a history he wasn’t there to share. It was almost like he was staring into something he shouldn’t see.

Most of the things on the bookshelf were photos, some large, others smaller, the majority of them having you in the frame. The ones that didn’t, he knew you were the one behind the camera. His eyes scanned the pictures, many had you with various people, some he recognized, others he didn’t, but he could tell almost all were from your WWE days. The larger ones always had you with a belt, either alone in the ring or surrounded by friends backstage. They were a commemoration of conquests you rarely even mentioned now.

Though, what surprised him the most was seeing an old photo in a wooden frame, standing almost humble in a corner. Compared to the newer ones around, it even seemed blurry. The picture had a much younger you, and on either side were Nick and Matt. He recognized that photo. He had been the one to take it, all the way back in Japan. Looking around, he saw a couple more pictures from that time, and although he knew he had no right to, he still felt his heart drop when he realized he wasn’t in any of them.

Shaking his head he moved on, aside from the pictures there were a couple assorted pieces of gear, beautifully worked, clearly something from special occasions. At one of the lower shelves he found a few figures, the WWE logo stamped on all of them. They had different clothes and even poses, but the one that got his attention was the one where you carried the belt. Kenny remembered seeing that exact one in a store one day and freezing, swallowing hard as he realized you had found success without him.

And then the feeling catches him again, but not quite the same way. You had found success without him, and it was a good thing. It was good that you had left. Looking through all of these things now, he finally took in the extent of the life you had lived. These objects all told a tale, not only of the path you had trailed, but of how important it all had been to you. He knew how hard you had fought to be free to do with your life what you wanted, to follow your dreams, even before you had gotten to New Japan. And even beyond that, you continued to fight and to conquer and to live your life to the fullest.

Suddenly, Kenny felt overwhelmed by the realization that he had almost robbed you of that. That his fear of being left alone had blinded him and almost chained you to the ground. That in his desperation to keep you safe, to keep you close, he had almost stopped you from having all of that. He had been selfish and childish and it was good that you were stubborn and relentless. He had always liked that in you.

“Oh, please, anything but that one,” your voice snaps Kenny out of his mind, only then realizing his fingers were almost touching the figure on the shelf. “The face mold makes me look awful,” you laugh and he has to try and calm his breathing, to force his heart to slow as he looks back at you.

“They never look quite right,” he laughs sheepishly, hoping you don’t notice his state as you approach.

“This one looks especially bad though, so sad that it’s the one with the belt,” you pout and Kenny almost melts, heart skipping a beat at the sight. “You must think I’m a hoarder, keeping all of this stuff.”

The words spill from your lips followed by a soft laughter, it’s sheepish and he can feel the hesitation in your smile. You feel ashamed, hands fidgeting by your side. No, he doesn’t think you are a hoarder, he wants to say. He knows the importance of the memories of all the things you’ve built. But the words get caught in his throat as he looks into your beautiful eyes. You both growing silent for a moment before he turns his gaze back to the bookshelf.

“No, I think it’s nice,” he hesitates, throat feeling like it’s closing, as if he was choking on his words. “I can see why you keep them.”

You stand by his side, shoulder resting on the wall, as you watch him speak. Kenny talks softly, he says the words with a smile, but you can tell there is turmoil behind the gentle curl of his lips. You can tell by the way he hesitates, the way he chews on his words, the way his voice feels just a bit heavier, a bit more controlled. You could only imagine what goes on in his mind, your eyes following his gaze to the most recent photo in the bunch. It had been taken only a month after your arrival at AEW, in it, you stood surrounded by new friends - and old ones - standing in front of the ring. Kenny is so tense he doesn’t even notice the silence growing again, but you can almost taste the anguish in it.

“Kenny,” you call his name gently, and he finally turns back to you, eyes almost gazing beyond your face, “what’s got you thinking so deep?” 

He blinks a couple of times, one hand rubbing the back of his neck as he laughs softly, but you don’t believe in that laughter for a second. “Nothing, really,” he starts, but you hum suspiciously his way, prompting him to squirm under your gaze a little, face turning back to the bookshelf for a moment and you can see him almost speak. His lips tremble and his jaw moves, but he hesitates, cutting himself off before any sounds come out. Then he turns back to you, taking a deep breath before finally talking.

“Just, these are all nice, honest. I can see what they represent to you,” he smiles kindly, but  the gentle curl of his lips feels bittersweet to you. “You’ve done so many things, and I’m really happy for you, really proud. You deserve everything you’ve got. And you truly became someone awe inspiring,” his smile grows bigger and you can tell the compliments are genuine, words spoken from the heart, but there is still tension in his voice, like a frozen lake, and you can see the shadow of something swimming just below the surface. “Though, I guess that was always a given, I never knew anything that could stop you.”

That’s when the ice cracks, and you catch a glimpse below, things falling into place in your mind. Guess that responded to your fears from all these months ago. Yes, he was aware of what he had to apologize for, he knew the sins he had committed, and now he was made to face them. To catch a glimpse at the other side of that door, and take the brunt of that feeling. Some time ago you’d relinquished this moment. Cherished the regret in his eyes as he looked at the photos on the shelf. But time had made Kenny into another person. One you could care for. One you could hold close to your heart.

“Come on,” you laugh, resting a hand on his shoulder and leaning your head against it. “You talk like I did way more than I actually did. I mean, not that I’m unhappy with anything,” you shrug, laughing softly, feeling a bit happier when Kenny follows along. “And I’m happy you like who I am now, you know? We all change and sometimes, that’s terrifying. I guess, in the end, leaving New Japan, coming to WWE, it was for the best, I can’t deny,” you rest your head fully on his shoulder now, looking up to see those ocean eyes glancing at you from under heavy eyelashes.

You want to console him, to tell him it’s ok, that your stubborn nature saved too much harm from being done. That in the end, since you left and got to make your life your own, you still could find space for forgiveness in your heart. But you can’t do that, not when he won’t truly tell you what he thinks. So you settle to try and say the things you mean, without saying the words. To tell him that despite the harm done and all the bad things, you still managed to find beauty. You managed to be happy, and you’d want him to be too.

“I mean,” you start again, free hand coming to circle around his bicep as you speak, eyes falling back to your photos, Kenny’s gaze following suit. “It all helped in the growth of my career - and, shit, despite my problems with them, I can’t say WWE wasn’t important on that too. But also on my growth as a person, I needed to do all these things I did to become who I am now. And sure, some of them were pretty stupid and reckless, but I don’t regret anything,” you say with a smile, squeezing his arm and bringing his gaze back to yours, those piercing eyes feeling raw and open. “Even though, my body may be a bit more fucked up now than it should. But we can never win against age in the end.” 

You finish your words with a warm laugh, laying more of your weight on his shoulder as your body shakes with the movement. You can only hope he has understood you, only hope you managed to get your point across. Kenny chuckles along with you, and you can feel his head shaking from above your own. A large hand covers the one you had on his arm, warmth spreading from his palm to you at the gentle touch. It made you feel happy, to hear him laugh, feel the warmth of his hand, made you believe that maybe you could get through.

“You are not old,” he retorts, squeezing your own hand, his smile reaching his eyes again.

“Ah, see how that feels now?” You pull away from him and playfully slap his shoulder, Kenny’s laughter filling the room. “But really, Kenny, I gotta face the music too. Time passes and my body just isn’t as strong as it used to be. That little cage match isn’t something I can do without weighing the costs now.”

“Come on,” Kenny rests his hand on your shoulder, smile never faltering from that beautiful face, his eyes filled with something tender and inviting that you can’t quite place. “You still got some years to go, and many matches like that last one to give during that time.”

His hold on your shoulder is tender, and once again his warmth spreads all through your skin. It’s like Kenny heats the room he is in just by being there, warmer than the sun and twice as gentle. He smiles at you with a kind certainty that makes you want to believe in his words, to believe that time would be good to you the same way he is. For a second you get caught in a bubble, removed from the rest of the world, this long moment where there is only you and him. Only this bright smile and beautiful eyes that make your heart skip a bit and make you suddenly forget how to breathe. 

Shit, you really don’t wanna think about what this means right now.“Let’s go,” you snap yourself out of it, slapping his shoulder and turning around in the direction of the kitchen, “food is gonna get cold, again. Hurry up.”

sponsored by: @xladyxfatex @wanderbreadsworld @madds-97 @morgan-bucks @tahiri-veyla @slut4kennyomega @of-twilight-and-moonshadow @himbos-hotline @moondust-imagines @madqueenpartna @adriswrld

[the--sad--hatter]

Steam - Chapter 1 (Loki x Reader)

Warnings - Loki, Smut, Violence & Gore, Swearing, Death, Angst, Dark Humour, Crack Humour, Shenanigan’s, Mutual Pining

Pairing - Loki X Reader (Slow Burn Romance), Enemies to Frenemies to Idiots in Love

Reader Description - Female, No physical descriptions, Only referred to by nicknames & Petnames (No use of Y/N)

Description/Blurb -

“So how’d you get the firepower? What’s your origin story?” Stark asked, peering at you curiously.

“Uh, this is my origin story…” You winced, sighing when he motioned for you to elaborate, “I got these powers about three days ago.”

It’s a tale as old as time, boy meets girl, boy tries to invade girls mind, girl sets boy on fire, boy turns into angry blue boy, they become sworn enemies.

When you suddenly become imbued with a power you have no idea how to control, Nick Fury picks you up and dumps you on The Avengers doorstep, deciding that they are best people to turn you from a wacky novice into a force to be reckoned with.

The power burning inside you has the potential to make you a hero, or destroy you completely, but your new fire based abilities are more than they appear, and in a stroke of spectacularly bad luck, The God of Mischief is the most qualified teacher to mentor you. With Loki guiding you, will you ever learn to control your power? Will you ever make it as an Avenger? Or will you crash and burn?

Only one thing is absolutely certain, when fire and ice collide, things are bound to get… steamy!

Chapter One - Ice Breaker

It was every bit as imposing as you’d imagined it would be, not that you’d ever imagined seeing it under these circumstances.

 “Are you coming?” Fury barked at you, breaking you out of your slack-jawed awe.

 You snapped your mouth closed and tore your eyes away from the legendary tower, looking at the doors where Fury was impatiently waiting for you.

 “Coming!” You squeaked, scurrying over to him, “It’s just when you said you were taking me somewhere where I could safely learn to control my powers, I was sort of picturing an underground bunker in the desert, not the freaking Avengers Tower!”

 “I utilise the assets I have, why would I send you away when I have a team of perfectly capable super-powered individuals?” He asked wryly, leading you across the lobby and straight past the security teams who did nothing to stop you both as you made your way into an elevator.

 “I’m just saying, a heads up would have been nice.” You muttered petulantly, crossing your arms over your chest and tucking your hands out of sight.

 You felt him look at you and studiously refused to meet his eye, staring instead at the numbers above the door as you were carried all the way to the top of the Tower.

 “Heads up, you’re meeting The Avengers.” He shot back.

You could say what you liked about the former director of Shield, he was true to his word, because the elevator doors wooshed open to reveal a waiting crowd of Avengers, all of them staring at the man next to you with varying levels of annoyance and/or distrust. You diligently pattered after Fury as he stepped forward to greet them, looking around the room reverently.

 The first person you laid eyes on was Tony Stark, Iron Man; the billionaire who had kicked off the modern age of hero’s, and next to him, Captain America, the first of the first, the OG Superhero. Stood behind the Captain was Sam Wilson, the Falcon and a personal favourite of yours, side by side with Bucky Barnes, the former Winter Soldier and poster-child for taking back control of your own fate. Clint Barton aka Hawkeye and the deadliest marksman in the world stood to the side with the Black Widow, deadliest person in the world full stop. In the back of the room two other figures were hanging back, emitting two very different aura’s. Doctor Bruce Banner eyed Fury with trepadition, and well-placed mistrust.

 It was the last person in the room that the majority of your attention was reserved for, the tall, imposing god who skulked in the shadows. Contempt and boredom radiated from him, and you couldn’t safely say it was directed purely at Fury. He was also the only one who spared you more than a cursory glance, and you slowed to a stop as you found yourself trapped in his curious gaze. You stared back, trying to reconcile the villain who once tried to subjugate the planet with the one you were locking eyes with. It had been months since he had joined the Avengers, but it never stopped being strange to see him standing with them whenever you watched footage of them taking on whatever bad guy of the week they were battling. However, he had been fully cleared of any wrongdoing in the battle of New York, apparently he had been mind-controlled. As to why he was helping the Avengers, nobody really knew.  

 Someone cleared their throat loudly and you forced yourself to look away from the stupendously tall god, glancing around the room to see that you now had all eyes watching you expectantly. Apparently you’d zoned out for the introductions.

 “’Sup?” You offered, waving in Tony Starks general direction.

 “So you’re Fury’s fiery friend, what has that got to do with us?” Stark sighed.

 “What, you think he bothered to explain his reasoning to me before dragging my ass up here?” You scoffed.

 “She’s here because she has abilities, abilities that she is more likely to learn to handle among similarly gifted people.” Fury explained in a tone that brokered no argument.

 Naturally, The Avengers argued.

 “We don’t have anybody with fire abilities.” You heard Natasha Romanoff point out, just before you took the opportunity to zone out again.

 You were absolutely certain that nobody cared very much what your opinion on the matter was, thankfully. You weren’t sure you had an opinion on the matter. It wasn’t like you had a lot of experience with these kinds of issues, and as far as you were away there wasn’t some superhero academy that you could enrol yourself in. Besides, you were much more interested in re-instating your staring competition with the god of Mischief.

 In the brief time you’d been distracted, he’d stepped away from the shadows and moved closer to you, staring at you with his arms crossed.

 You resisted the urge to inhale deeply, who knew ex-murderous gods would smell so nice? You looked up, and then up again.

 “How tall are you?” You asked incredulously.

 His gaze flickered down at you impassively, while you stared back and tried to mentally calculate his height.

 “I’m a Frost Giant.” He stated coldly.

 “Oh in that case, you’re kinda short.” You scoffed.

 You were flooded with immediate remorse but it was drowned out by amusement.

 “I beg your pardon?” He demanded, uncrossing his arms and stepping into your personal space.

 “Down boy.” Iron Man sniggered, stepping between you. “So how’d you get the firepower? What’s your origin story?” Stark asked, peering at you curiously.

 “Uh, this is my origin story…” You winced, sighing when he motioned for you to elaborate, “I got these powers about three days ago.”

 “So you’re a baby.” He stated matter-of-factly.

 “If I say yes does that mean I can just sit on the floor and cry until someone picks me up and holds me?” You asked, fully willing to give it a go.

 It had been three days since your life had literally gone up in flames, three days of pinning your arms at your sides, afraid to close your eyes, afraid to let your guard down for even a split second, afraid to allow yourself to feel even an iota of emotion.

 “So how did it happen?” The Captain asked firmly, getting the conversation back on track before you could find out if anyone would volunteer a hug.

 “I, well, I kind of…” You trailed off and looked at Fury for help, but he just stared back at you, the bastard.

 All eyes were on you as they waited for you to explain, nobody offering any kind of help. You exhaled forcefully and slumped your shoulders, tucking your chin so you didn’t have to look at them anymore.

 “I ate a bomb.” You whispered.

 There was a very long beat of silence before it was broken by several voices all at once.

 “I’m sorry, what?” Stark demanded.

 “What did it taste like?” The archer wondered, looking at you almost giddily.

 “She didn’t eat a bomb.” Fury finally stepped in to clarify, “She absorbed the blast, after failing to defuse it.”

 “Why was a civilian defusing a bomb in the first place?” Captain Rogers asked sharply, glancing at you in concern before turning back to Fury with a hard expression.

 “I’m not a civilian, I’m actually an Agent.” You reasoned.

 “She’s an Agent-In-Training.” Fury rebutted. “It was her first mission in the field.”

 “Baby.” Stark reiterated, faking a cough and smirking at you when you scowled at him.

 That was true, and you still didn’t think it was entirely your fault that the bomb had gone off. Yes you’d failed to diffuse it, but you were supposed to be watching the perimeter when you’d stumbled across the explosive device. It had less than thirty seconds on the clock, and you’d stupidly chosen to spend those seconds trying to stop it detonating instead of running away.

 “And you put her on bomb duty? Were you trying to get her blown up?” The Black Widow demanded, and you almost laughed until you saw the serious expression on her face.

 “There wasn’t supposed to be a bomb there, she was in the wrong place at the wrong time.” Fury shrugged, like it was inconsequential.

 To him it probably was.

 “She is still in the room, and I was exactly where you told me to be, when you told me to be there. If your intel was bad, that’s on you Mr Superspy.” You snapped.

 “Oh I see it now!” Stark briskly announced, “You’re trying to pawn her off on us because she’s too sassy for you.”

 “Precisely.” Fury admitted, surprisingly.

 “In the words of shortstack over there,” You hissed, gesturing at Loki “I beg your pardon?”

 “You don’t have the temperance to be an Agent.” Fury told you blankly, not bothering to soften the blow by at least telling you this in private instead of in front of the world greatest heroes.

 “I’d take that as a compliment.” Stark assured you.

 “You’re telling me I’m fired? Literally. Because I got blown up, through no fault of my own?” You huffed, clenching your firsts in an effort to keep your emotions from manifesting in a fiery inferno of rage.

 “Because you choose to try and handle a bomb you had no training to handle, instead of pursuing the target.” Fury amended, unphased by your distress.

 You bit back your retort because you knew it wouldn’t matter to him in the slightest. You couldn’t reason with him, couldn’t explain that you had made the choice not to pursue the target who’d planted the bomb, because you had to try and stop it exploding in a building filled with innocent people. Maybe Fury was right after all. Maybe you weren’t suited to being an Agent, because an Agent would have known that they couldn’t stop the bomb but they could stop the bomber. They would have let a hundred innocent people die and stopped the killer from killing a thousand more the next time. You weren’t an Agent because you’d chosen to die trying to save the hundred, and trusted in Fury and Hill to take down the Bomber.

 Of course, that wasn’t what had happened, and in the end nobody had died.

 “None of this explains how you ‘ate’ the bomb.” Clint Barton pointed out, and it was a good observation.

 “That’s because we don’t have an explanation. She went through the standard medical tests in her training, and all her bloodwork and scans indicated she was fully human. She walked into that building as a human being, and walked back out after absorbing a bomb, as who the hell knows what.”

 “So you’ve never done anything like this before?” Dr Banner asked you, speaking directly to you for the first time.

 “Not even remotely. I mean my eyes water when I eat chilli.” You shrugged.

 “Fascinating.” Banner muttered. “Inhuman?” He asked, turning to Stark.

 “Unlikely, she would have probably noticed going through Terragenesis.” Stark responded. “Mutant?” He shot back.

 “No, the mutant gene would have shown up in testing.” Dr Banner sighed, looking you over with a scientifically calculating eye. “Can you explain what happened in more detail?”

 “Sure, bomb went boom, I went AHHHHHH, and then it was all bright and hot and then the boom went away.” You told them.

 “So how do we know that it was you? What if something else contained the blast?” Someone asked, and you looked around before you finally realised it was Sam Wilson who had spoken.

 “No, it was… it definitely me.” You sighed.

 “How do you know?” Bucky Barnes interjected, backing up the Falcons line of questioning.

 That was the million dollar question. How could you be sure that you had anything to do with the bomb, that you had been imbued with fire power?

 “During the post-mission de-brief, there was an incident.” You alluded, side-eying Fury and taking a not-so-subtle step away from him.

 “Please tell me you tried to set him on fire?” Barton asked giddily, looking between you and your former boss.

 When Fury levelled you with a glare and you developed a sudden vested in the ceiling, the Archer sniggered joyfully. You chanced a look around the room and saw that Barton wasn’t the only one exhibiting mirth at the idea of Fury being set ablaze by your.. well, your fury.

 “He was yelling at me!” You defended, taking yet another step back when his glare intensified.

 “You’re lucky you had no aim and only managed to set fire to the table.” He snapped.

 “I think you were the lucky one.” Stark sniggered at Fury.

 “Do you want her or not?” Fury sighed.

 “Do I get a say in this?” You objected.

 “No.” Fury, Stark, Romanoff, and Loki said in unison.

 “I can run some tests to figure out what happened to you, if it’s reversible.” Banner offered comfortingly. “With your permission of course.”

 “I’m gonna go stand over there with him.” You huffed, making a beeline for the doctor and awkwardly hiding behind him.

 “Yeah, we’ll take her, should be an interesting riddle to solve.” Stark shrugged.

 Captain Rogers and his buddies glanced at you before appearing to have a silent conversation.

 “She can stay here while Stark and Banner figure out what happened, and we can go from there.” The Captain finally decided.

 “We’ll take good care of her.” Loki added with a charming smile.

 His eyes said something completely different, and you had a sick feeling that you were going to be made to pay for your short jokes.

 “Glad I meet your approval; I was worried I was going to fall short.” You sarked, immediately resisting the urge to punch yourself in the face.

 “Approval has nothing to do with it. Of all The Avengers, who do you think will be responsible for testing your abilities? You would do well to remember that I am more than mischief and lies, I am the god of chaos and fire.” He warned you cockily, visibly delighting in the way your grin faltered.

 You shot a pleading look around the room, but nobody was refuting Loki’s claim. In fact, they were nodding thoughtfully, or in Stark’s case; shrugging apologetically at you. You turned back to Loki, ignoring the deep sense of foreboding in your stomach.

 “Well Fe-Fi-Fo-Fuck.”

I have been trying to get back into writing for so long, and this is my last attempt. If this doesn’t work then I am out of ideas. 

I know this is a boring start but I have been re-working and rewriting it for days and I can’t improve it. If you enjoyed any part of this, please do tell me! If you didn’t, then tell me that as well. Just give me any feedback at all, I’d appreciate it so so so so so much. 

For those of you unaware (especially on AO3), I haven’t been writing for a while because my estranged mother passed away and it brought up issues that needed to be dealt with, but all that is over with now. Thank you to everyone who sent supportive messages and was patient with me ❤

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[shorkbrian]

you got any delusional/love sick yan Kiri on valentines day👀👀

You said lovesick and my mind jumped to

(What to expect - no NSFW, drugging, manipulation, marriage talks lol)

(inspired by when I was in the hospital and high off of whatever drug they fed me, I was so relaxed and did whatever the heck they asked. I had to get a catheter and they were like “Strip kid” and no questions I shucked off my scrubs right then and there, spread my legs when they asked, had no worries nor a care in the world. I agreed to anything and everything they proposed bc I was loopy as hell, glad my parents were there to like reel me in afterwards)

“Happy Valentine’s Day!”

A hand on your shoulder eases you from your slumber, blinking awake into the soft light of the morning.

“Breakfast in bed, your favorite-” Kirishima’s grinning wide, eyes big and full of love.

He’s pulled back the curtains, straightened up your room a bit, placed a vase full of flowers on your dresser, directly in your line of sight.

There’s a tray on the bed, a plate stacked with fruit, toast, and a cup of warm tea on the side. Tucked in the corner of the tray is a little red, heart shaped box.

“K-Kiri? What are you-”

“Here, open up!” The man is picking a strawberry, pinching it’s leaves, shoving it against your lips, but you turn your head to the side, brows furrowed.

He shouldn’t be here.

You shove his hand away with a stern look. “What the hell, how did you get in?” there’s no trace of sleepiness in your demeanor as you sit up.

Kiri waves his hand. “Ah, that doesn’t matter-”

“No, it totally does-” You huff out a sarcastic laugh. “I took your key back. How the hell did you get in Kirishima?”

The man deflated slightly, placing the strawberry back on the plate. He was sitting on the bed, shoes off, in casual clothes. “You know me, always loosing’ that thing. I made a bunch of copies for when I got drunk and couldn’t find my keys.” A toothy, apologetic smile is offered, but you’re furious.

“I don’t know what you think you’re doing, but you need to get the fuck out of my house. We’re done. It hasn’t even been a month, Kiri, I told you I wanted to take a break and that I needed space.”

Kirishima bites his lip, bows his head, looks up at your through his eyelashes like a wounded puppy. “But I missed you, and-well... it’s Valentines Day...”

“Get out Kiri, this is ridiculous. This is why I needed a break from our relationship in the first place. You can’t respect my boundaries.” You maneuver around the tray, slipping off the bed and onto your feet, before facing your ex-boyfriend. “Now leave.”

He doesn’t move.

No, he just sits there, staring at you. Then he sighs heavily, sadly, as if you had just insulted his manliness. “At least open the present I got you?”

“No Kirishima, please just go. And get rid of the copies you’ve made of my key. That’s fucking creepy.”

The redhead bristled at that, shoulders rising defensively. Yet still, he refused to move from his spot on the bed. “Hey, it’s not weird! They’re backups-”

“So you can come snoop through my stuff when I’m gone? I don’t want you around anymore.”

Maybe you were being harsh, but you had tried being nice.

Tried letting him down gently, that you wanted to work on yourself and focus on your career. That you wanted him to find someone who could give the same effort that he did, since you obviously weren’t.

Then you had been firmer after he didn’t accept it, explaining that he was smothering you in this relationship, guilt tripping you every time you wanted to go out, trying to manipulate you into feeling bad for him when you chose to do anything but spend time with the man.

He was co-dependent, and reliant on your presence to a frankly alarming degree.

Your stern words seemed to get through to him. The man nodded slowly, running his hands over his face. “God, okay, I’m sorry. I know I can be a little much. I just thought maybe.... I don’t know, that I could fix this? Fix us?”

“Breakfast in bed isn’t going to fix anything, especially not when you break into serve it.” You snipe, feeling a little cold, exposed in your big pajamas. It was warmer under the covers.

“I didn’t! I didn’t break in! I have a key-”

“Just leave, please.”

Kirishima sighed again, before he reached over the tray, picking up the heart shaped box. “Open the present and have one, then I’ll leave?”

Anything to get him going. This was how the two of you would fight, you struggling to make yourself heard, to be respected, and Kirishima completely ignoring your wants, stubborn and unrelenting in his desires.

You took the box as he held it out to you, quickly lifting up the lid to see mini chocolates. Classic Valentine gift.

“Just one? Then I promise I’ll go.” He pleaded.

A chocolate was selected, one with little sprinkles on the rounded top. You had to admit, they did look delicious.

Your ex-boyfriend always was a generous man, insisting upon giving. Giving back rubs, giving kisses, giving you prime cuddles and giving you undying love. 

“Can I feed it to you?”

A glare was shot his way, and Kirishima quickly fell silent.

One bite, then two, and the chocolate was gone. it was sweet, almost sickly so. When Kirishima left, you’d be throwing the entire box into the trash.

“Good girl.” His voice was low, mischievous, and your body heated up at the praise while you swallowed the chocolate down.

“’Kay, I had some, it was lovely, now get out.”

He rose to his feet, and you were reminded of his size, intimidated immediately by the way the man towered over you. You’d forgotten how big he was in the time you’ve spent apart.

But he moved past you without another word, out of your bedroom. 

You followed him down the hall, through the dining room, to the front door, where he stopped and turned.

“I know why you’re really pushing me away, (Y/N).”

“Oh, do you.” Crossing your arms, you waited for his explanation. 

“You’re scared. You found the ring, didn’t you? I understand if you don’t want to get married just yet, but I wish you had just told me that instead of freaking out.”

Ring? What ring? Marriage?

Kiri continued. “I’m willing to wait. I’ll always wait for you, no matter how long it takes. You can’t rush love, baby, you taught me that.”

Your face felt warm, he couldn’t be serious. Marriage? The two of you had been dating for a significant amount of time, but there had never been any talk of marriage.

“Kiri-”

The man took two steps towards you, invading your personal space. You tried to backpedal, overwhelmed by his sudden, looming presence, but meaty hands gripped your arms, locking you in place.

“Are you starting to feel it yet?” His face was too close, warm breath splashing against your skin, those dark red eyes searching your own, eager, anticipating.

“What? Kiri, let me go-”

“It’ll kick in real soon I bet, and then the real Valentine’s Day fun will start. Fuck-” The man breathed, pushing himself back from you a bit, taking a deep breath. “I’m so excited that I get to be with you again. I’m going to treat you right, you won’t ever have to feel afraid of commitment again. I’ll be the best boyfriend, best fiancé, best husband, best dad-”

“Kiri-” You gasped, struggling in his hold. The man didn’t even notice, lost in his own convoluted fantasy as he stared down at you with affection. You were starting to feel warm, woozy.

What was he saying about something kicking in?

“Did you-oh my god, did you drug me?” Is that why he had been so insistent about the chocolate?

“It’s not really a drug, more of a relaxer!” His smile was so bright, teeth too sharp. You felt unsteady on your feet. “I know you’ve been stressed out lately, and that's another reason why you needed a “break”, so this is the perfect way to relax!”

When had he picked you up? Kirishima was carrying you back towards your bedroom, bridal style. You rested against his chest blearily, blinking your eyes in confusion as your world spin.

“A nice breakfast, some cuddles...” He cooed, setting you on the bed, climbing up after you so he could rest you against his side. You felt like you were asleep, dreaming maybe? You didn’t know. 

Kirishima held a strawberry up to your lips. “Open sweetheart-” You opened, bit down, chewed, swallowed.

“We can mess around a little, I’ll light some candles- oh! And I brought wine too! We can drink some wine, play with each other.... I love you so much, (Y/N).”

A kiss, pressure against your lips, body crushed in a hug against a broad, muscular chest. You relaxed into it. Nothing felt real.

“We’re gonna spend the rest of our life together.”

[jeagerhearts]

03. Armin??

pairings: eren jaeger x gn!reader, armin arlet x gn!reader

summary: transferring to your childhood friend’s college seemed like a good idea at first. until you meet his friends, and have to make a choice that’ll possibly effect the future of a friendship immensely.

a/n: i didn’t proofread well so sorry if there’re any typos 💔

previous | next

WRITTEN PORTION UNDER THE FIRST IMAGE!!!

You would be lying if you said that you weren’t nervous. I mean, how could you not be? Connie’s friends were coming to help you settle in, and you hadn’t even asked them yourself. Not wanting them to feel forced, you told Connie that it was fine, but he insisted that they didn’t mind at all.

So here you were, in the middle of your empty dorm, waiting for them to arrive.

Your nerves seemed to settle down once you heard a set of places behind the front door, steadily getting closer.

“No, because I said that this was the building! Didn’t I, Ymir?”

“Is ‘yes’ the answer you wanna hear?”

“Duh.”

“Then no.”

You silently laughed to yourself as you overheard their banter outside, suddenly not feeling nervous at all. If anything, you were more excited to meet them more than ever.

A few seconds pass when you heard three knocks. “Come in!” you yell, trying to occupy yourself with anything so it wouldn’t look like you were just standing there the whole time.

The white door opens right after, revealing Connie and two girls by his side, one with short hair, and the other wearing a high ponytail.

The ladder looks in awe at the roomy space, walking in without any hesitation whatsoever. “Woah, this place is better than ours! Right, Mikasa?!” she exclaims, turning to the girl on the other end of Connie.

Mikasa, you presume, takes a quick look around herself, nodding her head in agreement. “Yeah, it’s bigger.”

“That makes no sense though!” the brunette said, stepping away from the kitchen to come face to face with you. You would be lying if you said it hadn’t freaked you out a bit, anyone would be, but she wasn’t as intimidating as she seemed to be. “It’s only you living here, right?”

“Yeah! I didn’t think anyone would want a new roommate so far in the year.” you explain, surprised at how easy she was to talk to.

“Sasha, maybe you should introduce yourself before invading someone’s personal space.” another voice speaks from the front door, the fourth party walking until she’s standing next to Sasha. “I’m Ymir.” she smiles, “This is Sasha,” the girl next to her waves, offering a warm smile. “And that’s Mikasa.”

At this point you think they’re too good to be true. There weren’t many kind people back at the university you used to attend, so it was a relief that Connie’s friends were so welcoming.

“Nice to meet you guys! I’m Y/n.” you beam, before noticing the ongoing commotion going on at the other end of the semi- opened door.

“They’re still out there?” Connie mumbles under his breath. “Guys, come in! You wanna get started or not?” he calls from where the rest of you stood.

They went on for a couple of seconds after that, the door opening fully to reveal two men with rather long hair.

Why hadn’t Connie introduced you to them sooner?

“Sorry, just Eren being a dumbass.” he grumbles, walking in nonchalantly with a smile on his face as he feels the man behind him get angrier.

“I’m the dumbass? You’re 19 and you still don’t know how to read a map!” he counter attacks, coming into full view and hot on the other’s trail.

“Only the paper ones!”

They hadn’t said much, but the small exchange of words made you giggle, and sent Sasha and Connie into a fit of laughter. You guessed Mikasa and Ymir were used to this, as they were able to bring their laughs to a minimum.

The sudden laughter made the two looking at each other face the rest of you instead, cheeks flushed with embarrassment when they realized that you were laughing as well.

Disregarding the laughs of those next to you, the man who had his hair brushed back turns his back to the man he was just arguing with, giving you his full attention. “Sorry about that. I’m Jean.”

You have almost no time to introduce yourself, the other, who’s hair was fairly longer, takes long strides until he’s in front of Jean, shoving him a bit in the process. “Shut up. I’m Eren.” he says, the smile he sent your way warming your heart differently then the way Ymir’s or Sasha’s did.

You don’t let your eyes linger too long, not wanting to give off the wrong impression only seconds after meeting them. “Nice to meet you guys! I’m Y/n.”

Just when you thought that this was everyone, another set of footsteps could be heard in the hall.

“Thanks for leaving the parking to me, guys.” A voice calls out in a sarcastic tone.

The door is opened by a fairly tall blonde, dressed in a simple crewneck and jeans. As soon as he stepped in, the two of you made eye contact, making your heart skip a hundred beats. The sound of his voice and the smile he sent you afterwards was almost enough for you to fall for him on the spot.

Why were all of Connie’s friends so attractive?

“That’s what you get for changing your mind last minute.” Connie says, earning a slap from Ymir.

“We should’ve left it to you.” she retorts, turning back to face you. “That’s Armin. He’s not an idiot like Jean or Eren.” she says, smiling while the two boys tried their best to defended themselves.

While they did that, Connie took a quick look around the room, realizing that everyone’s here and has been introduced, so they could finally get to work (he was only rushing because he’s been waiting for a game to arrive in the mail).

“ ‘Kay Y/n, show us to your car so we can get started. I don’t want anyone stealing my game!” he exclaims, throwing his arm around your shoulder dramatically.

Ymir scoffs as the eight of you finally make your way out the door. “Everyone has had that game for months now, I think you’re good.”

“It’s not my fault I had to save up!”

As the two of them continued to bicker, you couldn’t help but study Eren’s features as you walked down the hall. His face looked almost perfectly structured and his hair was pulled back messily, not enough to keep stray strands from falling onto the front of his face.

Pretty, you thought. You must’ve gotten lost in your train of thoughts, since he was now staring back at you, catching you in the act. He didn’t say anything though, giving you the same warm smile he did a few minutes ago, looking away when the elevator doors opened.

okay armin making a move 😫‼️

I KNOW THE CONTACT NAMES ARE DRY BUT ITS FOR THE DEVELOPMENT OKAY💔💔

—taglist! @loveprisms @starlightsemi @paradigm-e @thenamesholly

[weasleydream]

One step from happiness

Hi guys! How are you all? 

Here is the very first Harry x reader I’ve written, and I absolutely don’t know what to think about this... If you could give me your opinion, it would be greatly appreciated! 

As usual, feel free to like, comment, reblog and enjoy!

Masterlist 

(gif not mine)

Never in his life had Harry thought that once the war would be over, the first place he would want to see would be Privet Drive. To everyone and especially to him, it seemed impossible that he could miss anything from the place he had hated with such vigour, yet as he was sitting outside what had been Hogwarts, his thoughts drifted to someone who hadn't crossed his mind in months, if not years. Y/N. She was a muggle, her parents lived a few houses away from the Dursleys. If they were the kind of people aunt Petunia loved the most, their daughter had been the only one who had been kind to him. He still remembered the day she had shown up at the door with a bag of candies and had announced she was here for him. She had refused to give Dudley anything and after this day, her parents had refused to let her see Harry again. 

But neither of them wanted to obey, and Y/N and Harry had kept seeing each other regularly until Harry's sixth year at Hogwarts. From then, his mind had been too occupied and they hadn't had any contact since then. 

Maybe it was because all of this was finally over, maybe it was because he wanted something to make sure the young boy he had once been was still somewhere in this adult body, fact is that Harry wanted nothing more than to see Y/N once again. Even younger, she had always been able to ease his mind in a unique way, and her smile could make anyone's heart flutter. 

"What are we going to do now?" Asked Ron, making Harry slightly jump. "After some rest, of course. I can't wait to sleep in my room again."

"I'll go to Privet Drive."

Both Ron and Hermione looked at him in disbelief, their open mouth matching in a quite comical expression. While Ron was just incredulous, Hermione was looking like she suspected some kind of insanity, maybe some effect of all that had happened. 

"There's someone I want to see. An old friend." 

Ron smirked and elbowed him. 

"A lady, huh? And here I thought it was a living hell… You're a little liar, aren't you?"

Harry laughed with his friends, enjoying his light heart. It felt like he hadn't been able to laugh like this for years. Sitting here with his closest friends, watching the sun getting down, Harry felt a bubble of happiness forming in him. It had been a long and painful way, but Voldemort was dead and everything was okay. He was truly happy.

A strange feeling took over Harry as he arrived in front of the house he had once lived in. This house that, despite being the place he hated the most as a child, had protected him in a way even Hogwarts couldn't have given him. Animated by a deep curiosity, he approached the door and almost knocked. Almost. Something had caught his eyes, making him stop dead in his tracks. It was a feather. A long white feather with very tiny black spots which was on the floor just in front of the door. Harry knew this feather too well as he used to find dozens of these in his room. Slowly, as if to make sure it wouldn't fly away, Harry grabbed the feather and stuffed it in his bag. Now thinking of Hedwig, the heart heavy, Harry decided to step back and left the little alley leading to the door. A black car passed next to him before turning and leaving the neighbourhood. For a second, Harry wondered why he felt like he knew this car, but then he realized. It was Y/N's parents'. 

Harry walked toward her house, kinda afraid of how she could react. She had every right to be angry, after all he was the one who had stopped giving any sign of life. At the thought of her rejecting him, he suddenly felt his heart shattering and that almost stopped him dead in his tracks. But then he remembered he had just survived after fighting Voldemort, being rejected by a childhood friend wouldn’t kill him, right? 

The front of the house hadn’t changed in all these years. Of course, the appearance was the same as all the houses of Privet Drive, pretty, simple, well maintained, but even the flowers decorating the windowsills and the mat seemed to be the same ones that were here the first time Harry had showed up at this door. It was funny how he seemed as anxious now as he was this day, when Y/N had invited him for her birthday. 

A clear voice answered him only a second after he knocked. 

“I’m here!”

And she opened the door. She looked even more beautiful than the last time Harry had seen her. Her Y/H/C hair was tied in the same ponytail she had always worn and her famous necklace, where her name was written, was shining on her black sweater. Her Y/E/C were still so bright, and currently wide open. 

“Harry?”

“Hello, Y/N.” said Harry, waving before quickly scratching his head.

Y/N stayed still for another second before smiling broadly and grabbing his hand, practically pulling him inside. While Harry was mentally cursing himself for being so awkward, Y/N led him in the living-room which hadn’t changed either. 

“It’s been so long!” exclaimed Y/N. She seemed so happy to see him that it warmed Harry’s heart. “What were you up to? Oh Harry, I’m so glad you’re here!”

“I’m sorry for having been missing for so long. I had… some important stuff to take care of.”

“Of course, you and your famous secrets.” she said before smiling again, yet less largely. 

“I’m sorry, really.” repeated Harry. “You would completely freak out if I told you, and I’m not the only one involved. It isn’t-”

“Up to you to decide whether you can tell me or not.” finished Y/N. “I know the song.” she added with a smile. “So, if what you’ve done these last years is highly classified stuff, can I ask you if you’ve been alright?”

It was the question Harry had feared the most. When he had decided he would come to see her, he knew one of the first things Y/N would want to know would be if he was okay. It had always been one of her biggest preoccupations, and even then Harry knew he wouldn’t be able to hide the pain he was feeling deep down from her. For once, he wasn’t wrong: without being able to prevent it, he frowned and Y/N’s eyes immediately darken. She sat on the couch, patting the fabric next to her, and put her hand on Harry’s shoulder. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked quietly. 

Her big eyes were on him, showing all her worries but not bothering Harry at all. In fact, he felt more confident than he had ever felt - or at least than he had felt the last two years - and he suddenly felt the urge to tell her everything. Y/N seemed to feel the internal battle he was fighting and she slowly lifted her hand, her fingers softly brushing against his cheek. 

“You’ve changed so much,” she murmured. “You’re a man now. The last time I’ve seen you, you didn’t seem that mature.”

“That’s because a lot has happened.”

Harry had put his hand on Y/N’s one and they stayed like this, looking each other in the eyes, both trying to process what was this tension between them and why it was so pleasant.

“You look sad.” she noticed, her voice filled with a sadness she was feeling because of her incredible compassion.

This is when, without really wanting it, Harry’s mind drifted off to the ones he had lost. His parents. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Fred. Hedwig. Dobby. Friends, family, dead because of all this war he had been embarked in. Sitting under Y/N’s gaze, he felt the tears invading his eyes and soon rolling down his cheeks. Y/N didn’t say anything nor did she remove her hand from his cheek. She just wrapped her second arm around him and rested her forehead against his. They stayed like this for a while, until Harry’s tears were dried off. Then Y/N spoke up, her sweet voice reaching straight to his heart. 

“Whatever happened, it’s over now. You can heal from your wounds. Everyone is constantly trying to find peace, Harry. You are not alone, and you’re only one step from happiness. Make peace with what’s haunting you and I swear you’ll feel better. I can help you, if you want.”

“How do you do this?” whispered Harry while his hand was losing itself in her hair. “Making me feel better, knowing that now everything is over. You’ve always known better than myself.”

“You wouldn’t be here if your important stuff wasn’t over, would you?” she smiled, and Harry felt the corner of his lips curling up. “As for how I can make you feel better, it’s just because you deserve it. You’ve always deserved it, Harry. The young boy as much as the adult, all I’ve ever wanted was you to be happy.”

“I feel like now I can be.”

“Now you can be.”

And in the same way it had felt natural to come back to Privet Drive after the war, it felt natural for Harry and Y/N to kiss. Maybe it was the step he needed, maybe now he would finally be happy. With Y/N in his arms, it certainly felt so. 

[theworldofotps]

Silent Stranger (Part 1)

Pairing: Dexter Lumis x Reader Word Count: 2,377 Description: New to NXT, Y/n makes some new friends who warn her to stay away from one of their coworkers. Misunderstood and silent Dexter can’t help but admire the new woman at work.

Part 2

Part 3

Dedicated to the sweet anon who said they would like to read some Dexter fics in the future. And I had been planning to but never had an idea, my sweet friend Rachael gave me this idea which I love. Anon I really hope you like this, and thank you so much @new-zealand-chic for all your help. Xx

Warning: Povs switch between first and third person throughout the fic. They are separated by ~~~ so hopefully you don’t get confused. ____________ Tag list:

@hungmanhorsecarriage @writtingrose @sjwrites22 @sassymox @the-beastslayers-queen @thewrestlingwarehouse @new-zealand-chic @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @xladyxfatex @biforrollynch @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @demonqueen29 @itsicantbelievethis666  @lilred91 @xbreezymeadowsx @rebellious-desires @youcantreignonmyparade @melblacc @undiscovereddisneyroyalty

If you wanna be added to the list lemme know. _____________

“Glad you could finally join us Y/n we’ve heard some amazing things from the PC about you, I truly hope you enjoy working here with us at NXT.”

“Thank you so much Hunter I really appreciate it, I’m sure I’ll love it.”

I smile shaking his hand, standing I pull my bag over my shoulder following behind him as he leads the way from his office.

“I’ve already gone ahead and asked Shotzi to show you around just until you learn the ropes and know where everything this. She was thrilled to be the welcome committee, any questions you have just go ahead and ask her.”

“Thank you that takes away some of the nervousness I had.”

Following Hunter, down a few halls, we come to the back area where a few superstars were sat at tables doing their own thing or eating.

“Hey Shotzi come here for a moment please.”

I watch as an energetic woman comes over quickly her green hair standing out brightly, at least I wouldn’t lose or mistake her for someone else.

“What’s up boss?”

“This is Y/n, she’s the new superstar I was talking to you about the other day.”

“Of course the one I’m showing the ropes to, it’s so nice to meet you I hope that you enjoy working with us here.”

“Thank you, it’s nice to met you too I really appreciate you helping me.”

“You’re welcome, it’s no trouble at all I know how hard it can be when you first get here and who better to befriend on your first day than me?”

Shotzi laughs and lets out a little howl then hooks her arm with mine quickly leading me away from Hunter who chuckles waving. Walking around Shotzi points out a bunch of different areas and even introduces me to a few of the other wrestlers sitting or walking around. 

“What do you think so far?”

“It’s great better than I ever dreamed it could be I’m honestly so excited that this is going to be my life.”

Smiling as we sit at a table with some bottles of water and a bag of chips to share I look around watching everyone.

“Is this everyone?”

“No way, there are some in other parts of the building working out and some didn’t come in today. But you’ll see most of them on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays.”

“Okay got it.”

I say eating a few of my chips as nervous as I was to be finally here I was more excited and hoped to befriend some of my coworkers.

“Once you’ve finished eating we can head over to one of the practice gyms and do some work to practice for whatever match you end up having first for your debut.”

“Sounds good to me I’m more than ready to get started.”

Shotzi smiles at me patting my back as we make small talk finishing our snack then heading off to find a ring to work out in. ~~~~~~~ Dexter walks quietly down the hallway he had just finished a match and gotten a shower. Since he wasn't needed for anything else tonight he was going home. Adjusting his duffel bag on his shoulder, he gets halfway through the center before feeling a smaller body crash into his from behind. Thinking it was someone doing an unexpected promo he quickly turns around stopping when he sees the new woman that joined NXT a few weeks ago. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to run into you. I'm trying to hide from my friend and wasn’t watching where I was going.”

She says and gives him an apologetic smile, Dexter offers his hand helping the woman up off the floor looking her over to be sure she wasn’t hurt then gives an incline of his head. She was trying to keep her balance as she adjusted her shoe. Hearing someone call her name he turns and leaves continuing on his way to the parking lot. Not noticing the woman left standing behind, staring after him. Getting into his car he starts it pulling out of the lot and driving back home.

That was the first time he had seen her face to face, the last few weeks she was at Full Sail he had taken a genuine interest in her. He had learned a little about her having overheard conversations with their coworkers while he was eating lunch. He honestly was kind of hoping to run into her sooner or later and found himself wanting to befriend the woman. He just wasn't sure how to go about it, maybe it was just best for him to be silent and wait. It was what he did best and he really didn't want to let people know he was curious about her.  

The drive from Full Sail to his house was filled with a little music playing on the radio. Other than that his mind was just wondering, he couldn't help but smile when he moved and the faint scent of your perfume hit his nose. You hadn't even touched him for that long. Parking in the garage once home he goes inside. Dexter was more than ready to sleep; he just needed to brush his teeth and change into pajamas. Stepping into his bedroom Dexter begins stripping crawling into bed once he is changed and settled. He was excited to go back to work to see you. 

~~~~~~~~~ Looking up from my book I smile seeing Finn walk into my room carrying a small vase full of flowers. 

"Y/n delivery." 

"Hey Finn, wow those are beautiful where did they come from?"

"I don't know I was coming to see if you wanted to grab lunch with Shotzi and I. They were sitting on the floor outside your door and there is a card that says. 'Hope you enjoy these flowers, they pale in comparison to you.'"

“Awe that’s so sweet.”

Standing I took the flowers, smelling them then reading the card, it was typed out so I wasn’t able to find out from handwriting who sent them. 

“I wonder why they didn’t sign their name.”

“Well if you ask me I think you have an admirer.”

“Oh come on Finn I haven’t even been here that long how could someone admire me?”

Setting the flowers on my small table I read over the card once more as he sighs dramatically and sits down next to me.”

“Because you’re an awesome person who just seems to draw people in even when you don’t mean to. I know you don’t feel like you’re good at making friends but people just can’t help but want to be around you.”

“If you hadn’t trained me at the PC would you have felt that way when I came here?”

“Probably then again I don’t know, being the champ makes me busy so it’s a probability but I’m sure we would have become friends quickly anyway.”

“Awe that’s sweet of you.”

Pinching his cheek lightly I laugh as he swats my hand away standing back up and stretching. 

“You wanna go get some lunch?”

“Yes I’m hungry.”

Standing I grab my phone pocketing it and following Finn from the room shutting the door behind me, placing my arm through his grinning.

”Lead the way Prinxey.”

~~~~~~~~

Dexter watches from the shadows as Finn picked the flowers up that he had left for y/n, he really hoped that you liked them. Waiting until you left he walked over with a small gift box full of a few things for a self care day. Opening the door a crack he slides the gift in, he didn’t want to invade your privacy by going all the way in. And he was thankful you hadn’t remembered to lock the door before you left. Closing your door gently Dexter quickly leaves just to keep anyone from spotting him. Going back to his room he sits down to start on a drawing he was doing for you.

For the next month Dexter left you small gifts, drawings and notes just something to make you smile. Nobody could tell you who it was doing this all and he couldn’t believe his luck that you hadn’t found out it was him yet. You two still had no communication apart from the night you ran into him. He was good at staying hidden and to be honest he was nervous about how you’d react. It wasn’t any secret that a lot of people thought he was weird and even a bit scary. But the few people he had managed to befriend they all stayed out of each other's intimate relationships. And he wasn't sure if he wanted to go changing that now. ~~~~~~

"I can't for the life of me figure out who's been sending these gifts."

"Have you gotten any new ones lately?" 

Looking across the table at Johnny whose wife I was currently feuding with, I nod my head. Reaching into my bag I pull out the most recent picture. Handing it to him I watch as he looks it over then shows it to the guy beside him. 

"I can almost guarantee you that it's Lumis, he's the only person around here I've seen that draws like this."

Johnny says and hands the picture back with a chuckle.

"Which one is he?" 

I ask as if I didn't already know, I had been paying attention to Lumis since that night I ran into him. There was just something about his presence that made me want to know more about him. 

"He's that really tall guy kind of blonde colored hair, mustache and muscles he wears those leather gloves when he wrestles." 

Johnny says and then points towards the door over my shoulder. 

"That one right there, aye Dexter! Are you the one sending these weird pictures to Y/n?"

"Like you'd actually stand a chance?"

The guy sitting with Johnny laughs loudly, frowning I watch as Dexter stops in his tracks staring at our table. He quickly turned away leaving the catering area.

"Why would you do that?"

"Oh come on y/n don't worry or waste your time on Lumis he's a freak that's why he stays to himself."

Johnny listens to his friend before turning his attention back towards me.

"You'd do your best to stay away from him y/n honestly."

"I think that should be my choice to make and right now I'm going after him. I suggest you two find something else to do then be awful to someone who just doesn't wanna talk to people."

Grabbing my things I quickly leave the catering area looking down the hallways. I had no idea where Dexter had gone or even what room he stayed in. Pulling my phone out I text Finn.

Y/n🎶⭐: Do you know where Dexter's room is?

Hitting send I begin walking around if Finn couldn't help me I may have to find a staff member who could.

Finn😈👑: It's one hall down from mine left turn

Finn😈👑: Why?

Y/n🎶⭐: Cause Johnny thinks he's the one that's been sending me the pictures and gifts and they called him out on it and I think they made him feel bad

Y/n🎶⭐: So I wanna talk to him

Finn😈👑: Dexter doesn't really talk to anyone here except for the few people that he's friends with

Y/n🎶⭐: It's worth a shot

Finn😈👑: Just be careful and if you need anything let me know

Y/n🎶⭐: I know thanks Finn

Pocketing my phone I make my way down the hallways heading for Finn's room. Once past it I go down turning left. I look at the doors, not all the superstars had their own changing rooms but Dexter's was one of the only few back here. Taking a deep breath I knock on the door then step back to wait and see if he opened the door.

"Hi Dexter."

I wave after he opens the door.

"Can I come in please?"

Dexter steps out of the way after a moment of hesitation, stepping inside I walk a little farther in his room and look around. He motions to the couch, smiling at him I sit down fiddling with my fingers in my lap.

"We haven't formally met apart from me running into you, I'm Y/n. I wanted to come and apologize for how Johnny and whatever his friend's name treated you. I didn't think showing him the picture would cause that, I was just hoping he could help me figure who sent it."

Pulling out the picture I place it on the small coffee table between us.

"Did you do this? Are you the one who's been giving me the flowers, little gifts and drawings."

Watching Dexter rub a hand against his neck then nods his head, smiling at his gaze darting around the room I place it back in my bag.

"I want to thank you for everything. It was really sweet of you. You don't have to be embarrassed about it either if you were, I'm actually quite flattered."

I explained looking around the room, he hadn't said anything yet and I wasn't sure what else to really say.

"I know you don't really say much but maybe would you like to exchange numbers? I think we could be really good friends, and it would be easier for you."

Dexter nods and grabs his phone, swapping we put our names in and I hand it back.

"Well I guess that I better go, I have a practice match coming up and I don't wanna miss out. Thank you again."

Standing I walk to the door Dexter holding it open for me, stepping out I turn giving his hand a light squeeze then quickly making my way back towards my room. I felt really good about how it went and I hoped we could be friends. Stopping at my door when my phone goes off I pull it out smiling.

D. Lumis👁️👁️: Would you like to go get coffee or something sometime? Maybe Wednesday morning?

Y/n💮: I would love to😊

[magniloquent-raven]

for fluff: "one more chapter" or "there's enough room for both of us"

it’s been 84 years............ but here u go lmao tysm for the prompts!!!!!! i used both!

CW for some brief suicidal ideation, just in case. it’s v mild but pls be careful yall (i know, this fic was supposed to be fluffy 😅)

posted on ao3

------

Billy’s life had changed a lot in the past two years. 

So much that some days he barely recognizes himself in the mirror. The scars, the state of his hair—which he hasn’t cut since last summer and generally just throws back for convenience’ sake—the stubble he doesn’t bother with most days. Small things, in the grander scheme of what’s different about his life, but it adds up.

And it’s Friday night, he’s curled up at home, and perfectly content to be there. 

There’s a steaming mug of cider on the coffee table (a scratched-up old thing that Hop left him when he officially handed off ownership of his trailer to Billy), and wind rattling the windows, and Max is asleep in the next room. It’s...cozy. 

El stopped by earlier that afternoon, Max in tow, demanding Billy let them stay because Mike was being a dick or a DnD campaign was going on too long and El’s character died a while back so she was bored, or...something. Possibly Mike was being a dick about her character being dead. Max kept chiming in with her own two cents worth but it really just made the whole thing harder to follow.

But it didn’t really matter why they stopped by, they’re always coming up with reasons to invade his living room and eat all his food and nag him about teaching them how to do fancy braids. And Max usually wanders off to nap in his room when El starts asking Billy to read to her.

Which is what he’s doing now. 

Last month he read her Jane Eyre (her idea). A week ago they started The Hobbit. 

It’s been slow going, considering how often El interrupts to ask questions, and every time there’s a song they have the same argument about him not actually singing, but they’re making progress. 

He’s reading through the weird goblin song as monotone as possible just so he can laugh at El’s disgruntled scrunchy face, and putting up with her poking his thigh with her toes when he rolls his eyes at her, and honestly having the time of his fucking life, because, yeah, saying things have changed in the past two years is the understatement of the decade.

When he gets to the end of Over Hill and Under Hill and closes the book she gasps dramatically, sitting up and pulling the ugly orange throw blanket (gift from Mrs. Byers) she’d been snuggled up in tighter around her shoulders.

“Billy, no!” 

He drops the book in his lap and raises his eyebrows at her. “It’s the end of the chapter.”

“No.”

“Yeah, it definitely is.”

El frowns at him, her whole face going pinched. “But you can’t stop there.”

It’s moments like this that almost make Billy forget she can kill people with her brain. Moments when she just looks like a kid, all wrapped up in her favourite blanket and pouting. 

And it’s like she knows that’s his goddamn kryptonite. Because those moments also remind him that she deserves this. More than anyone he knows, she deserves all the childish crap she wants, and more. It won’t ever replace the childhood that was taken from her, but it’s a start.

So, needless to say, Billy has a hard time saying no to her.

He drops his head back against the cushion behind him, staring at the ceiling for a moment—pretending to contemplate, while she glowers at him—and sighs loudly. 

“One more chapter.” 

She beams.

They’re only a few pages into Riddles in the Dark when a car pulls up, and Billy doesn’t even have time to put the book down before the front door bursts open. 

“El! Will thought he—is that The Hobbit?” Dustin comes to an abrupt halt two paces into the room, blinking at the book in Billy’s hands. All his little friends nearly collide with his back, and there’s suddenly a gaggle of obnoxious teenagers huddled in Billy’s doorway. 

“Who cares,” Lucas scoffs, pushing him out of the way so he, Wheeler, and Will, can shuffle the rest of the way inside. “Get out of the way!”

Billy is still trying to figure out what the fuck’s even happening when Steve goddamn Harrington walks in behind his pack of brats. Because of course he was the one who drove them here. Him being a fine upstanding citizen and all that. With nothing better to do, apparently. (Not that Billy has room to judge anymore.)

Suddenly the bickering kids are mostly background noise. Billy always did have a hard time concentrating on anything else when Steve’s in the room. Especially when he’s looking like that, warm brown eyes lit up with interest, and the corner of his mouth pulling upwards in a half-smile. His cheeks are pink from the chill outside, his hair a mess from the wind, and locking eyes with him makes Billy’s heart pound. 

They’ve been on good terms these past few months and it’s a special kind of torture that Billy wouldn’t give up for the fucking world.

But he doesn’t get to enjoy the view for long because—

“—the Mind Flayer might be back!”

Billy stiffens. “What?” He glances at El. She’s sitting up straight now, her eyes dark, expression closed off. 

Mike sighs irritably. “Weren’t you listening? Will thinks he might have sensed the Mind Flayer, so we needed to make sure El’s okay.” He crosses his arms, glaring at Billy. “Because the stupid thing wants her dead, remember?”

“Wheeler,” Steve hisses, and smacks the kid’s shoulder.

“Yeah.” Billy grits his teeth, cold fingers trailing down his spine. “I remember.” 

The room is silent for several agonizing seconds, the kids all exchanging glances. Until Billy’s bedroom door opens and Max shuffles out, rubbing her eyes. 

“What’s everyone doing here?” 

~~

They’d all been hanging out at Steve’s when Will had a bad feeling. The same kind of prickling bone-deep chill he’d gotten two summers ago. Needless to say, ignoring it until people started dying didn’t seem like the way to go this time, hence the home invasion.

Which had been Steve’s idea, apparently. Or. His initial reaction had been to blurt out does this mean Billy’s possessed again, and it had spiraled from there. To Mike freaking out about El not being safe because she was here, to Lucas reminding him that Billy had only gotten the better of her when she didn’t have powers, to Dustin yelling about checking in with her either way because she might have The Facts. 

And so they’d broken a couple traffic laws to get here.

Billy suspects Steve feels guilty about suggesting he might be possessed, because he got very awkward when it was brought up. And he stepped in several times when Wheeler and Sinclair’s interrogation got a little too intense (there were threats of hot pokers involved).

It should have felt condescending—Billy’s a grown-ass adult, he doesn’t need someone defending him from lanky teenagers—but he can’t help feeling a little warm when it’s Steve coming to his defense. 

The discussion overall is a mess. El doesn’t have any answers, Billy hasn’t felt anything odd lately, and the lack of anything to go on beyond Will having a momentary freakout is putting everyone on edge. 

Max, who squished herself onto the couch between Billy and El, cuts through the cyclical arguing after the third dramatic eye-roll from Mike. “Guys, can you cool it for a second. We’re getting nowhere.” Her protest is punctuated by a yawn, which makes El giggle. 

“She’s right,” Steve sighs, mussing with his hair absentmindedly. “Billy and El are fine, everyone’s fine, we should all get some sleep.”

“Dude, are you sure you’re good to drive?” Dustin asks, squinting appraisingly at Steve. It’s a fair question, it’s late and Steve looks like he’s about to keel over, but Billy’s not sure he likes where this is going.

“Who said anything about driving?” Max snorts, glancing at Billy. 

Damnit Max.

“Is there even space for everyone here? This place is tiny.”

“Fuck you, Wheeler, not all of us can live in goddamn mansions.”

The kid opens his mouth to retort, bristling with indignation, but Will interjects, stuttering a little in his haste, “I, um, I’d feel a little safer if everyone, you know, stayed in one place? At least for tonight?”

And that pretty much settles it. 

Once everyone mumbles their (in some cases reluctant) agreement, El crows “Sleepover!” and drags Max off to find spare blankets, leaving Billy sitting on the couch alone and wondering where the hell Steve is gonna sleep. For...no particular reason...other than…

Well.

It’s not like Mike was wrong, the trailer wasn’t built to house six teenagers and two twenty-somethings. Most of them are going to end up squished on the living room floor, and Max and El already called dibs on the couch, and...well, unless Steve wants to crash in the fucking kitchen there really isn’t anywhere else for him to go other than Billy’s room. He doesn’t even have a goddamn tub the guy could curl up in. 

And just because he’s wanted Steve Harrington in his bed since minute one, doesn’t mean he wants it right now. Not like this. 

Because like this he has to deal with Max’s side-eye, and El’s knowing look (the girl has been in his head, she literally knows everything about him), and Will’s weird wide-eyed interest, and worst of all, Steve not doing this because he wants to. 

In fact, judging by the way he blanches when Max suggests it, Billy’s room is the last place he’d like to be. Which is not really something Billy ever really wanted hard proof of, thanks. 

He’s dealt with enough in his life, he didn’t need to know exactly how repulsive Steve finds the idea of sleeping in the same room as him. 

“You’re welcome to sleep in your goddamn car if my floor isn’t good enough for you, Harrington,” he bites out, probably harsher than was warranted. 

Steve blinks at him, mouth falling open, eyebrows raised. 

“Oh my god, it’s too cold to sleep outside, Billy,” Max says, rolling her eyes. “Stop being such a dick.”

“Whatever,” he mutters. “Figure your shit out, I’m going to bed.” 

The silence he leaves behind is tense and awkward. 

He’s been laying in bed staring at the ceiling, moping and berating himself, for about ten minutes when the door creaks open.

“Hey, uh,” Steve’s voice is soft, uncertain, and Billy feels like even more of an asshole for snapping at him. “I’m just...gonna...crash on the floor. Um. Good night.”

This is punishment isn’t it. For being such a douche for so long. Now he gets to try and fall asleep knowing Steve fucking Harrington is laying nearby, sleepy and warm and out of reach. He listens to Steve shuffle around, getting situated, laying out blankets and trying to find a soft bit of carpet to lay on. Has to bite his tongue to keep from saying something stupid. Like offering up his bed. Or poking fun at how much Steve sighs when he’s getting comfortable (Because it’s dumb, not cute. Definitely not cute.).

It’s unclear how long they lay there in the dark, Billy watching moonlight cast the outlines of skeletal trees across the wall, listening to Steve’s quiet breathing to remind himself he’s not alone. That the shadows are just shadows and there’s no reason to be tense and sweating and—

Billy’s pretty sure it’s been long enough that Steve should be asleep, considering how tired he looked, so he tosses his blanket off and swipes the pack of cigarettes off his bedside table, hoping to god the floor doesn’t creak when he pads across the room. There’s no noise coming from the other room, so either the kids are asleep too or a miracle has occurred and they’re all just being really quiet. 

He slips out the side door, and takes a breath. The lake is too still, despite the wind. No self-respecting body of water doesn’t have waves. But it’s pretty enough, he supposes. Enough to make for a decent view while he smokes a cigarette.

Takes a couple tries to light up. His hands aren’t what they used to be, especially in the cold. Holding off a thirty-foot meat puppet bare-handed does that to a person, tears shit up that doesn’t heal right afterwards.

He’s about halfway through his cig when Steve joins him. Billy’s shoulders stiffen at the sound of footsteps, and he doesn’t relax at all when he realizes who it is. 

“Hey.”

Out of the corner of his eye Billy watches Steve lean against the porch railing beside him. He takes another drag before he looks over properly, keeping his expression as neutral as possible. “Fancy meeting you here.” 

“Couldn’t sleep?”

Billy raises his eyebrows. Gestures with his cigarette and turns away again. “No shit.”

He can feel Steve’s eyes on him, and he resolutely ignores it. Stares out at the water and flicks cigarette ash over the railing. The wind picks up again and cuts through his thin shirt. Should’ve grabbed a fucking sweater. Not because the cold bothers him at all, but...well, because it doesn’t anymore.

He shivers when a completely-unrelated-to-the-weather chill runs down his spine.

“Soo…” Steve fidgets, and trails off awkwardly, his nonchalance painfully fake.

The corner of Billy’s mouth twitches, and he raises his cigarette to his lips, a flimsy excuse to hide his smile. 

“Did, uh. Did El choose the book, or…?”

He chokes on a mouthful of smoke. Doc Owens did tell him he shouldn’t have taken up smoking again. Though he was probably more concerned about Billy’s scarred lungs and than Steve Harrington-related hazards. 

Coughing definitely does hurt a lot more than it used to though. 

He flinches when Steve touches his shoulder, pats it, rubs a little—trying to help with the coughing, presumably—making Billy’s heart trip over itself. 

Once he’s no longer wheezing he wipes his eyes, and waves off Steve’s apologies, hoping the embarrassed flush on his cheeks isn’t too visible in the dim light. 

Steve’s hand stays where it is.

For several quiet moments Billy waits for him to withdraw but he doesn’t, and Billy finally meets his eyes. Which was probably a mistake. His heart skips again. He’s still not used to Steve looking at him like that. Soft and wide-eyed and concerned and…

God, he’s so fucking beautiful. Billy used to dream about getting this close without needing pretense, without having to pretend, getting to bask in the warmth coming off him and feel his breath on his skin and see something other than indifference—or worse, the hatred that came later—looking back at him. What he has now is...not quite what he wants. It lights him up but leaves him wanting. 

Another gust of wind makes a mess of Steve’s hair, locks falling into his eyes and sticking up in all directions, and Billy itches. Clenches his fist to stop himself from fixing it.

“Her dweeby little friends kept talking about it, and she couldn’t get through it herself. So...” Billy trails off, scratching his cheek and glancing away. “I may have had a copy laying around.”

Steve’s hand finally leaves its perch on his shoulder—both a disappointment and a relief—to brush the stray locks of hair out of his face. He grins at Billy, whole face lit up and stupidly pretty even as his fingers get stuck in tangles. “Really?” 

“Yeah.” Billy bites the inside of his cheek. “My mom used to read it to me.” 

It’s easier to talk about her now. Mostly with El, who’s still the only person who knows the full story, but, well, he’s pretty sure at least Max and Steve have guessed the bits they weren’t told. Or, hell, maybe El told everyone everything during those months he was out of commission and everyone thought he was dead, and no one’s brought it up to his face because it would be awkward as hell. 

In any case, Steve’s expression softens. 

“Oh,” he says quietly. “So, you and her were pretty close, huh?”

If asked Billy would have blamed the sudden sting of tears in his eyes on the wind. “I guess.” A pause. “Not enough for her to take me when she left,” he mumbles, chewing his thumbnail and frowning out at the lake.

His cigarette hangs between two fingers in his other hand. 

“Billy…”

“Don’t. I’ve heard every condolence in the book, okay. It’s...it’s fine.”

For several long moments the only sounds are the dry rustle of leaves in the wind and Billy’s nail-biting. 

Then Steve slips his fingers around Billy’s wrist and tugs gently. Too surprised to resist, Billy lets him. Lets his hand be pulled away from his face, thumb pressed to his pulsepoint, lets him hold on for a beat longer than necessary before letting go. And Billy stares at him the whole time, lips parted, shoulders tense, waiting to see what Steve will do next.

What he does next is smile a little sad, and tilt his head. “It’s a bad habit, you know. Biting your nails.” 

“I don’t have any other kind of habit.”

“Hm,” Steve hums, “I don’t think that’s true.” 

Which is a weird thing to say, and a weird thing to get emotional over, and yet Billy kind of feels like he’s been punched in the chest.

He rubs at the knotted scar tissue that spiderwebs across his whole torso, and can’t help but wonder—not for the first time—if Steve’s perception of him might be a little blinded by the one good thing he’s ever done. He’s tried to be better since then, atone a little, but Steve’s confidence in him still feels unearned.

And all the work he’s put into getting his shit together might all be for nothing anyways, if some fucking slime monster decides to crawl down his throat again. If Will’s right and that thing is back...for all he knows the thing has it out for him too, after the shit he pulled at Starcourt. He thought he’d end up dead, he wasn’t exactly worried about making himself a target in the long run. 

But now...

Billy exhales slowly through his nose, eyes falling shut for a moment before he grits out, “I can’t do it again.” Steve blinks at him, nonplussed. “This,” he taps his scars, “The fucking. Mind Flayer bullshit. I can’t.”

“You…” Steve folds his arms across his stomach, hands clutching his elbows. It’s a nervous tic that makes Billy ache. Always makes his heart clench, but tonight that gets lost in the black hole of anxiety already twisting up his insides  “You won’t have to, I—we’ll protect you. If we stick together—”

“It’s not a guarantee.”

“No, but—”

“We don’t know anything about this alien shit, for all we know I was never really free of it, and—I just—promise you won’t let it use me again,” Billy’s voice breaks, and he clenches his jaw to try and hold it all back, the taste of bile in the back of his throat, the crushing weight of existential panic pressing in. 

Steve’s eyes widen, “What do you mean by that?”

“You know what I mean. Crash another car into me. Let your ex shoot me in the fucking head. I don’t care how, I need you to stop me.” He needs to understand, Billy’s eyes bore into him, willing him to understand.

But he shakes his head, face twisted up with horror, “I don’t think I can do that.”

Billy takes a step towards him, desperation bleeding into his voice, “Steve.” He blinks back tears. “Please.” 

“Don’t—” Steve looks away, curling in on himself, “Don’t do that.”

“Do what, ask you to perform a public fucking service?” Billy spits, eyes stinging, face burning. He regrets the words once they’re spoken, but there’s no taking them back now. He’s talked with Owens about this sort of shit and he thought he was past it. 

Apparently not.

He deflates. Like a slap in the face, it stops him dead, turns his agonizing back inward where it fucking belongs. Wiping his eyes, he sighs. 

It’s too late to stop the puppy-dog eyes Steve’s giving him now though. The unreserved sadness in the way he’s looking at Billy is so overwhelming it’s almost palpable. “Is that really how you feel?”

Is it? He’s not sure anymore. It was for a long time. Long enough that he couldn’t remember feeling any other kind of way until El reminded him. But now…

He shrugs. “It’s...complicated. I—ah, shit!” His hand jerks, and the cigarette he’d been holding falls to the ground. That never used to hurt so fucking much. “Damn thing burnt me.” 

He sucks on the stinging knuckle, waiting for the pain to subside, tasting salt and ash, and looks back up at Steve.

They lock eyes.

Steve’s expression has closed off, his gaze still heavy, but with something else, sliding down Billy’s face with an intensity Billy’s not quite sure what to make of. He’s struck dumb by the attention (not something he usually has a problem handling), lips still wrapped around his finger but his mouth has gone slack.

It feels like a static shock, one crackling jolt of a moment, something sharp lancing through him, and then it’s over. Steve’s blinking, glancing away. Billy’s hand falls to his side. It would be like it never happened except he still feels charged, pent up, heart full to bursting and stomach in knots. 

Billy sighs, and rubs his eyes. “Let’s just...go back to bed.”

Wording, Billy. Wording. His cheeks warm a little, but he manages to keep his expression neutral as he turns and heads back inside.

He practically throws himself into his bed, curling up on his side and pulling the blankets around him, back turned to Steve. Sleep seems like a pipe dream at this point, but doing anything other than pretending to get some rest would involve talking to and/or looking at Steve, so. Not an option. 

But after he listens to Steve settle back into his little pile of blankets, the minutes crawl by, and Billy gets twitchy. Wants so badly to move, toss and turn and fidget, and say something, but doesn’t know where to start and doesn’t want to draw Steve’s attention, and—

God, this is so fucking stupid.

Billy rolls over. “Steve.”

“Yeah?” 

The room is silent for a beat. He shuffles around a little and the sheets rustle loudly in the quiet.  

“Would you get up here,” he says suddenly, all at once, demanding, scarcely believing what the fuck is coming out of his mouth. 

“...What?” Steve sounds a little breathless and it makes Billy’s stomach clench.

“Just...there’s enough room for both of us, alright.” Jesus christ. 

The lump of Steve and blankets on the floor doesn’t move. He doesn’t speak, for what seems like an eternity, and Billy’s about to brush it off, turn it into a joke, take it back, something, when—

“Okay.”

Oh.

What?

Oh god, he’s getting up. This is happening. Billy stares at his silhouette, the tense line of his shoulders, his awkward gait, and wonders why he’s agreeing to this if he’s so goddamn uncomfortable. 

Guess the floor is officially less comfortable than being in bed with Billy. Joy.

But then he’s sliding under the covers and Billy forgets to be bitter because his brain is mostly static at this point. White noise and his heartbeat thundering in his ears and the deafening creak of boxspring groaning under unexpected weight.

And Steve’s doing that thing again, sighing, little hums as he wiggles around getting himself situated, and Billy is dying. He thought he was being punished before, but now he’s sure, because this is ridiculous. No grown man should be that adorable. 

By the time he’s gotten himself comfy Billy is about ready to combust. 

It doesn’t help that he’s decided to lay down extremely close and facing Billy. It’s so intimate it hurts.

“Do you think you’ll actually sleep?”

Billy shrugs noncommittally. “Maybe.” He tries to make it sound more casual than it is. Like it’s a choice and not the sad fact that he’s too fucking anxious to relax. 

Seems he’s not the only one though, Steve keeps fidgeting, his face doing something weird Billy can’t quite see in the gloom. But he doesn’t have to see to recognize Steve’s tics.

“Spit it out,” Billy sighs.

“What did you mean. When you said it’s complicated?” Steve asks softly.

Ah.

“You really wanna get into this?” He sure doesn’t, but Steve nods and Billy’s fucking weak when it comes to giving Steve what he wants. “I meant that...I...used to feel like that. All the time. It was fucking relentless.” He thinks about rolling onto his back so he won’t have to look at Steve for this, but finds himself stuck, drawn in by the faint starlight reflected in Steve’s eyes. “But nowadays I’ve got...shit to hang on for, I guess. Doesn’t make it all go away, but it makes it easier.”

“Oh.” Steve wriggles a little closer, his hand landing in the space between their pillows. Right next to Billy’s hand. Close enough that he can feel him there, but not quite touching.

He doesn’t say anything else, which Billy’s grateful for. He’s got Doc Owens for the big speeches about how life is worth living, and it’s grating enough getting them from someone who’s literal job is to say that kind of shit. 

It helps. It does. But he can only handle so much.

Speaking of which.

“I’m sorry,” Billy says quietly. He’s keeping his hand too still for it to come across as casual, trembling with the effort. If he moved his pinky just a little they’d be touching, and he’s painfully aware of this fact.

“What for?”

“Earlier, when I...I was asking for a lot.”

“Oh.” Steve shifts, the blankets rustling as he shuffles around, but as much as he fidgets, his hand stays where it is. “Billy...I don’t want you to have to go through that again, but…”

Billy, on an impulse—with a feeling somewhat akin to stepping off a ledge without a parachute—hooks his pinky over Steve’s. In the dark he hears a soft intake of breath, can just barely make out the way Steve’s mouth falls open, moonlight casting shadows when his tongue darts out to lick his lips. 

“I know. It wasn’t fair to—”

“No, no,” Steve flips his palm upward and laces their fingers together, squeezing Billy’s hand. “It’s not that. You have every right to be scared, and...look, this whole thing is batshit crazy, none of us know how to deal with it.” 

Billy runs his thumb along the length of Steve’s index finger, marvelling at the contact, and the way his pulse flutters when the gesture is returned. It takes him a second to find his voice, “True, but you’ve never asked me to mercy kill you.”

Steve exhales, the ghost of a laugh, and it warms the back of Billy’s hand. He shivers, his whole arm tingling. “Billy, I haven’t gone through half the shit you have.” A pause. “I want to help. Anything you need, just...not that.” 

Anything. It catches in Billy’s throat, stops his heart for just a second, reminds him that they’re inches apart, in bed together. For the second time tonight he feels like he’s been punched in the sternum, and he goes rigid, relaxing only minutely when Steve squeezes his hand again.

“Careful, pretty boy. Saying shit like that might give a guy ideas,” he murmurs, gaze searching, wandering Steve’s face, the shadows cast by the soft fall of hair across his forehead.

“Oh yeah?” Steve pulls their clasped hands to his chest. His heart is racing, but his voice is steady, “Well, have enough ideas with no follow-through and a guy might think you’re all talk.”

Billy’s breath catches. The world stops. “You...you don’t want me to follow through.” 

The reality of the situation hits him like a train. Flirting is one thing, he’s always had a hard time keeping his mouth shut around Steve, but this is something he’d only ever regretted letting himself imagine because he knew he’d never have it. And now that it’s within reach...

“See, the thing is…” Steve slides a little closer. His knee brushes Billy’s thigh. “I really, really do.”

“I—” his voice breaks, mouth dry, throat closing up as he tries to swallow past the lump making it hard to breathe. 

“Billy,” Steve whispers, a hot puff of air against Billy’s lips. “Please.”

Fuck.

He surges forward—hard enough that their teeth click together—and his mouth muffles Steve’s gasp. The hand not cradled against Steve’s chest comes up to touch his cheek, fingertips caressing his jaw, coaxing him closer, sliding back to thread into his hair. 

Steve’s lips are plush and warm against his, curved into a smile that leaves Billy tingling, dizzy and drunk on sensations. The way his mouth tastes, the softness of his skin under Billy’s scarred palm, the way his heart twists when Steve reaches out to touch his chest.

He pulls back, and rests his forehead against Steve’s. His eyes stay shut and he just breathes. Soaks up the moment. 

“God,” Steve sighs, nuzzling their noses together. “Always knew you’d be good at that.”

“Yeah?” Billy asks quietly, fiddling with the stray locks of hair behind Steve’s ear. He’s feeling...raw. Vulnerable. It’s a fragile state of being, one wrong word away from breaking. Or a few right words away from fucking bliss, but that never seems to be how it goes for him. 

“Yeah, even when we didn’t like each other I wondered. Annoyed the hell outta me.”

“Steve…” He pauses, choosing his words carefully, “I always liked you.”  If his heart wasn’t already racing, it sure would be now. He braces himself for the worst.

But it doesn’t come. There’s a pause. Steve’s fingers curl into the front of his shirt. “Oh.” He presses a chaste kiss to Billy’s lips, lingering, before chuckling lightly. “That explains a lot actually.”

Billy’s cheeks burn. Yeah, he supposes it would. “You’re not...freaked out?” he ventures, hesitant. 

“Mm, nope.” He reaches up, brushes a stray curl out of Billy’s face. “Definitely okay with this.”

I love you.

The thought doesn’t shock him but the desire to say it out loud does. The way it lodges itself in his throat and sticks. He hasn’t said it to anyone—hasn’t wanted to say it to anyone—since his mother left. The precedent is intimidating, but…

Steve smells like honey and clean air, laying in bed with Billy, warm and pliant next to him tracing patterns in Billy’s scars, his gaze is fond, his smile is soft, and...and Billy’s in love.

He swallows. Pushes it down for now. 

He kisses Steve again. Slower. A gentle press of mouths, and another. Takes his time deepening it, teasing with his tongue. He waits for Steve to pull away, to decide that this thing is one thing too far, but it never happens. Steve lets him escalate, and gives as good as he gets. 

They’re both breathless and flushed and Billy’s riding high on the bubbling warmth in his chest, lightheaded from it. He slides his leg over Steve’s, straddling his thigh, pressing down, seeking friction. 

He shifts, rocking forward a little, and Steve moans, low and deep right in Billy’s ear.

They both freeze. Steve’s breath coming in ragged little bursts against the side of Billy’s face. 

“Pretty boy, as much as I’d love to hear more of that, no one else in the house does.”

“Jesus christ.”

“No need to bring him into it.”

“Shut up,” Steve laughs and buries his face in Billy’s shoulder. “Just give me a minute.”

“Aw, I get you all riled up, baby?” 

Steve slides a hand down, down, and palms Billy’s cock, drawing a short gasp from him. “Yes.”

They stay entangled the rest of the night, dozing in and out of consciousness, Steve pressing the occasional sleepy kiss to Billy’s collarbone. And...Billy’s not sure what will happen after tonight, but he knows it’ll be easier to deal with if he gets to keep this. Whatever this is. He doesn’t have the heart to ask, not yet, but for the first time in a while, he has hope.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

I'M LATE I KNOW OKAY I HAVENT BEEN ON MY BEST FOR THE PAST MONTH IM SORRY

Kai handsome man come back to ussssss 😫

Okay, first I gotta apologize for not being activated for a while due to personal problems. But little by little is getting better.

Second, Happy late (supposed) birthday my dear Overhaul amazing Kai Chisaki!

Not so pointless day

You blinked a bit when some rays of the sun rose invaded the room and hitted the slightest the bedsheets and on your face, indicating that it was finally time to get up.

You turned ever so slowly your face to see the man right behind you. Peaceful sleep on his handsome face, one thing that it was rarity due to his late work hours... a smile appeared on your lips at seing your lover so relaxed and you had to really control yourself to just not carress his handsome face or to even kiss him.

You already had plans today. And since you got Pops and most of the subbordinates of the Shie Hassaikai by your side on this idea, there was no way Kai would know about this! And you had to be extremely careful or your boyfriend would end up discovering everthing!... much like last time.

You shifted a bit to ever so slowly left the bed sheets for you to slide your legs out of the bed on the cold floor... but just when you were about to lift up, you had noticed that Kai was with one arm wrapped around your midsection.

Great. Just on the day you just couldn't be on the bed cuddling with him and just couldn't wake him up, he HAD to have a grip on you. Perfect. Just GREAT.

Cursing under your breath you slowly lifted his muscled arm up enough for you to slide on the bed and gently place it back down. You tip toed, still with looking at Kai, and just when you had reached the door of the bathroom you made the mistake of sigh in relief.

"I know what you're pretending to." His low and full of sleep voice manifested from the bed and you immediately cringed.

Curse his light sleep.

"H-Hey!!!" You smiled sheepish even seing that he didn't open his eyes still "Morning hands-"

"Get back on bed. Is early as shit and I don't have work." He mumbled with a hand on his face, groaning when he opened his eyes a bit only to close then again due to the sun light.

You giggled at his words, knowing that only when Kai was tired that he didn't care to let out one or two curse words.

"I would love to, but I've got plans and-"

"Yeah and you're not doing it." He said nonchantly, sending one eyed glare at your direction "Once again, I knwo what you're planning, and that's not happening."

"Wha? What are you talking about?" You felt a drop of cold sweat on the back of your neck, yet you did your best to hide your nervousness from Chisaki.

"Don't play dumb now (Y/n). You and I nnwo what day it is. And you're not doing shit." He growled while getting up on his elbows to fully stare at you from the bed.

"I didn't plan anything!" You lied, lifting your hands up in false defense as he arched one eyebrow at you, clearly not believing your words.

"Of course. Then you wouldn't mind to get back on the bed now?"

"Actually..." you poked your fingers together as you looked everywhere but his amber eyes "I-I.. I promised that I would help Pops on the garden!"

"What?" He arched his eyebrow even more, standing from his bed "No you didn't-"

"Yesterday! I-I promised him this and I couldn't just-" you forced a laugh when he got up and crossed his arms while staring you down, getting just a bit distracted at the show of his muscles "Deny it, right?"

"You're the worst liar I ever laid my eyes on (Y/n)." He nonchalantly spoke as you cringed even more before dead panning.

"Wait, is that a compliment or-" he interrupted you with kiss, shutting you up pretty quickly. His hands travelled down to your waist as he bitted lightly on your bottom lip to allow you to give him a entrance.

You sighed and moaned a bit at his touch and the kiss before he broke apart only to trail hot fervent kisses on your neck to stop right by your ear lobe to whisper huskily.

"I guess that maybe if you want to surprise me on this pointless day, then at least I got to choose what I want." He nibbled a bit on your ear lobe "Dont you agree my angel?"

Just when you were getting on his trap, a knock on the door made him grunt and you pout a bit.

"Master? Pardon me but we have to get out to solve a few things."

"Nemoto..." he growled in your neck and you remembered your plan on a flash, giving your best to not smile in yeargness.

Kai started to glare at the door and straightened his back up "I have sure that it was talked that this day I had a break." He said in annoyance, still holding you close to him.

"I do know of that master, and excuse me for this. But it is something important that can't just be waited." He rolled his eyes at that before looking at you, mentally either cursing poor Nemoto or apologizing to you.

"Go." You smiled warmingly at him before pecking his lips "We can continue this later when you come back." You whispered lovingly at him and mentally yelped in glee at the half smile he gave to you in a minor of seconds before he returned to his serious expression, telling Nemoto to give him a minute.

"Luckily it won't take much time." He muttered while picking his white tie and putting around his neck "Don't mess neither burn the house down while I'm out."

You scoffed playfully while getting up to tie his tie for him, smirking at the serious look he gave to you but knowing how he secretly loved the action.

"Right mister future leader of the yakusa." He growled while rolling his eyes, getting out and grabbing his jacket.

"I will see you in some hours." He said, subsconciously waiting for the three words he never had courage to say to you but secretely craved to hear it.

"Right! Bye!" You waved cutely at him, giggling at his deadpan look and a hint of dissapointment of not hearing an 'I love you'.

Just when Kai got out he nodded at nemoto who greeted him. Sneakily you poked your head out and smiled wide at Nemoto.

"Thank you so much!"

"Is not a problem (Y/n) sama." He bowed a bit "Which hour we have to get back again if you dont mind me asking?"

"I will send you a message or Rappa. Think only you both can take care of distracting him enough?"

"Rappa is an expert. He just doesn't have to die. While I have my methods." He smirked before waving at you politely when he got called out again as you got out of your room with a determined look.

"Is now or never!" You said to yourself just when Kai left the house. Chuckling while making your way to start the whole thing you had planned ever since the start of this month.

~

"And here I thought that you were joking when you wanted everthing perfect." Kurono muttered while double checking for any dirty on the halls as you got a message for a friend of yours that the cake you ordered was coming and was just to pick outside.

"We're talking about Kai here." You giggled as Hari was quiet for a minute before nodding with a 'fair enough'.

"GeT thE FuCk OuT Of My WaY ClEaNInG ThE FlOOr Is-"

"STOP YELLING AND JUST CLEAN IRINAKA!" Hojo shouted after Joi as he dried the floor right before him.

"I have to admit that I am surprised to see that you got everyone on the Hassaikai to collaborate." Kurono muttered as you both got out and you thanked the delivery man while picking up the box with a huff before thanking Hari for offering to carry it instead.

"I talked with you and Pops first."

"... That explains a lot." He peeked inside the box and whistled "Kai is going to freak out on all of this. You know more than I do that he hates surprises."

"But this one is a good surprise!" You whined while opening the door "How could he hate it?"

"Because it involves his birthday (Y/n)." He said suddenly on a serious tone as be walked along sides you to place the neatly cherry and vanilla cake on the center of the table.

"You do know already he doesn't give a shit neither celebrate it. Heck, it took him even begging Pops once to not celebrate his birthday when he made 16."

"I know." You sighed and looked at the clock "But at least one good memory I want to give it to him when this day comes. Is not fair that on my birthday he buys almost a whole market and on his birthday he says something like 'I just was born'; 'Nothing special happened on this day' or the worst: 'Why celebrate something that is not valid?'" The white haired man couldn't help but chuckle at your imitation of Kai before apologizing at seing your serious face.

"Well, he is not much of someone who celebrate those things."

"He can't complaint it if it isn't something giant!" You exclaimed just when Pops entered and chuckled at your dramatic action.

"I am relieved that my boy got someone like you to take care of him like that (Y/n)." The elder chuckled while you put your arms down with a blush on your face as the asshole in your side snorted.

"So?" He looked around with a serene smile "This was the start of your present for Chisaki. There is more?"

"I actually have two presents for him." You smiled before looking at Kurono "Did you and irinaka were the only ones that got him something asides from me and Pops Kurono-kun?"

"Negative." The man took out one hand of his white hoddie and pointed with his thumb outside "All the eight precepts got him something asides from Rappa."

"Why I am not surprised at this?" You sighed and both men chuckled at your action before Pops grabbed gently on your shoulder.

"Come (Y/n). I want to show you something." You made a surprised sound before Kurono nodded and told you he was going to take care of things while Pops dragged you to his own office.

"Have to say (Y/n), you're a blessing on our lifes." The elder sighed as he made his way to his desk as you looked around in awe.

"Oh! Is nothing!" You smiled at the elder "Kai always say how he doesn't particularly care, but I cam see the bit of... happines when I at least wish him a happy birthday... I guess." You looked at the ground witha shy smile before jerking your head up at hearing the elder footsteps and standing right in front of you with a smile with a coal black box on his hands.

"Seems like you know more of my Chisaki than I do." He opened the box and you widened your eyes with a gasp at seing the jewelry inside.

It was a pair of pigments with the symbols of the ying and yang separated. Both shined at the light of the room and you looked up at Pops with confusion.

"This belonged to me and my wife a long time ago." He looked up at you with a smile "You remind me of her sometimes kid."

He picked up the ying symbol while leaving the box on a table as he put the necklace on you.

"Despite us being japanese. She loved the concept of it, and I bought it. I never actually came to talk about her to Chisaki so I would like this to remain as a secret between us." You nodded a bit hesitantly before he smirked at the sign of you with the neck lace as he grabbed the box.

"The ying yang means two halves which come together to complete wholeness, both the sides are dependent on each other. And as I can tell by looking at you and my... son, you both belong-" he grabbed the yang symbol and hold your necklace, with a 'click', the two pieces were stuck together.

"Together." He showed you before splitting them apart and bringing your hand to his older one to close around the other necklace "Give this to Kai, I have other present for him."

You couldn't even mutter one word of gratitude or any for that matter before your phone buzzed up and you excused yourself to answer it.

~

"Please tell us we can go back." The man spoked as he watched Rappa dodging another attack of Chisaki on a abandoned alley "The situation here is critic. What happened? Well.." Nemoto took his cellphone out of his ear to make Chisaki's companion to hear the whole mess.

"THEY WERENT EVEN DEALERS YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE CLEAN FREAK!"

"Have on your mind that your movements Rappa are EASY TO PREDICT" In one second the man was overhauled and Nemoto hissed at that before bringing his phone close again.

"Sure we can go? Right, thanks (Y/n) sama."

"What about (Y/n)?" Chisaki muttered darkly while sending a cold glare at Nemoto who flinched a bit.

"Fuck."

~

"SOMEONE HOLD THIS FUCKER!" Kurono shouted as Hojo and Setsuno had a firm grip on each of Tabe's arms while Irinaka on his tiny form gripped the man's hair, as Tabe himself said the word 'EAT' franquily while trying to reach at the table.

You and Pops had just gotten back and the elder scowled at the attitude of his workers, like they were some kids.

"Enough is enough!" The elder shouted and everyone grew quiet and lowered their heads "How many years any of you have now? 2 to five now?! Due to your current attitude and behaviour I wouldn't be surprised." The elder crossed his arms as everyone on the room looked down in ashame.

You furrowed your eyebrows a bit before an idea popped out. You eargly went to table full of goods and put a good amount to every precept of each of the things you had ordered except the cake.

"Here! You guys can have those while Kai is not back yet!" You offered each one their pieces and giggled when Tabe just swallowed the whole thing... plastic plate and all.

"You're too good for the mafia (Y/n)." Setsuno chuckled as Hojo nodded with a smirk.

"Right right, every one of you out before Chisaki appear eh?" Irinaka slapped his hands when he returned to his normal form as you gave him a quizzical look before he got down to whisper in your ear "I'm sure the boss won't have it many people here despite all that bullshit."

You pouted and still promised everyone that got out to give them a piece of the cake.

"So?" Kurono came by your side "When the man of the party is coming?"

"By any min-" you flinched as Kurono and mimic grabbed their guns when they heard the door being slammed as some shouts were heard.

"I SWEAR TO FUCKING ALL MIGHT HAVE A CHILL YOU FUCKING SOCIOPATH! YOU ALREADY KILLED ME ONCE TODAY!"

"Repeat a hero's name on my house again. Go on. I dare you." You gulped at hearing Kai's tone of voice, full of wrath and disgust as some parts of the wall were overhauled.

Rappa stormed in the room along with Nemoto as they closed the door with a sigh... not caring about the looks they were receiving.

"Package delivered. I want my fifth bucks." Kendo extended his muscular hand to Irinaka who grumbled a bit and handed him the money.

"Is he..?" Kurono pointed at the door as Nemoto glared at Rappa.

"Furious thanks to someone here who decided to comment on (Y/n) sama again."

"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO STARTED-"

"That's it." The elder commented harshly, again silencing the room "Both are dismissed for now, you guys can come back later if you want anything to eat."

"I would let Rappa to starve boss." Mimic commented as Kurono hummed in agreement, ignoring Rappa's swear words.

You tip toed out of the room the moment the two men left the door, leaving them discussing with each other as you searched for Chisaki.

"Kai?" You called out and the said man appeared with a tired and angry expression. You smiled in sympathy while tilting your head as he aproached you "Rough day?"

"Only a nickname compared to what I had to atture." He growled before slidding his gloved hands through his dark brow looks. "Where the hell is those two-"

"Wait wait wait!" You stepped on his front with your hands on his chest "Can I show you something first?" He arched his eyebrow at you, bit still sighed and with a motion of his hand told you to proceed.

"You have to close your eyes." He deadpanned at that before his face scrunched up in realization.

"I swear to god." He muttered with a hand pinching between his eyebrows.

"Please???"

"I lost count of how many times I told you to not do anything!" He spatted while looking at you with a bit of dissapointment and anger.

"Please my capoo?" You put on your puppy eyes and hold your hands together as he glared down at you.

"I despise you." He sighed before closing his eyes, growling when he heard your yelp of glee and sensing you getting behind him.

"Can I touch you?"

"Washed your hands?" He sighed a d cringed a bit when the soft skin of your hands and arms brushed over his shoulders and part of his face not covered with a mask. "If you run me into a wall I swear that I will consider on overhauling you."

"Sure sure!" You giggled and tip toed due to his height to keep your hands close to his eyes and opened with your foot the door before whispering a 'there' on his ear.

He opened his amber eyes and arched a eyebrow at seing the sweet in front of him before he looked at you in suspense and the whole room. "How many years do you think I have?" He asked nonchantly but you rolled your eyes at him.

"No one is 'old enough' to have a little celebration on your birthday!"

"Is a pointless-"

"Not for me." You said in a serious tone and he seemed surprised at that, but his face stayed monotonous "Kai I love you more than anything! Is not a pointless day if a bunch of people care for you." You pointed at a pile of boxes and he arched one eyebrow at that "Those were some gifts that the eight precepts brough."

"Out of order I suppose."

"Geez dude accept already." Kurono said with a smirk before elbowing Kai on the arm, Chisaki immediately screeching at the area with a glare at his childhood friend, muttering a 'dont touch me'. "(Y/n) had all this work for you man." Irinaka muttered while munching on a snack.

Kai's glare turned into a soft gaze as he looked at you. Hesitation still on him, he grabbed one bottle of sake close to him, inspected a bit before popping it out. Scoffing at the cheers that his old man, companions and partner did at catching that he had accept it.

"Is your favorite flavor of cake my capoo!" You pointed at the cake, not seing his fond smile due to his black mask before he punched Irinaka and kurono for laughing at the nickname you gave it to him as the Pops shook his head with a laugh. Kai was at least a bit eased back for real to yours surprise! You could notice that despite his monotonous face, a little bit of happiness was still on his golden eyes that you loved so much.

"So?" You chirped on his side as he poked his generous piece of cake, mask down to his chin only to eat "Whatcha think??"

He only arched one eyebrow at you before doing something you never expected. He poked your nose with the uttensile he was using, you gasped at the action with the residues of cake on your nose before he smirked devilish at you, throwing the utensils away and catching you off guard by handing you a handkerchief and kissing your temple while no one was looking.

"Not so pointless. Happy now brat?" He muttered before getting to grab another uttensiles as you tried to understand what had just happened.

Bonus!

"How thoughtful and cliche no less." He inspected the yang necklace, you were a bit insecure before smilling widely at seing him putting the necklace around his perfect neck.

"That's not the whole thing!" You chirped before jumping out of the bed and going to the bathroom. He arched one eyebrow before widening his eyes at the clothing you were using. Showing all the parts of your body he loved the most...

"Do what you must do my capoo~" you cooed before crawling your way to his lap "Your final gift my love".

"And the only one I wanted to unwrap." He growled before twirling both of you around so he could be on top "Finally my truly desert." He growled close to your ear before... you know. Long night for the both of you ;)

[dappercritter]

Random She-Ra Season 5 Thoughts: THE FINAL RAMBLING

Yep. I finally got all my crazy absurd thoughts about this gay adventure-romance-drama cartoon summarized into one incoherent yet fun to read computer document/article! ...four months after the show itself ended. Oh well, no one’s perfect. Anyways, there are a whole lot more insane observations than ever before, so I had to put it below a link so this thing didn’t back up my blog or any of yours. Hope you enjoy reading through these as much I enjoyed spouting them for no discernible reason other than I felt like it!

-I feel that since is the last season, I ought to talk about an important part of the show that I’ve been putting off: the animation. It’s… okay. It’s definitely smoother than what the original 80’s show and it’s brother series (heheh) looked like, but at the same time it still seems to suffer from similar limitations which causes some distracting moments of stiffness. But other than that, it’s pretty good. It’s no Titmouse or Studio Mir but it looks good and it gets the job done.

         -After all, let’s not forget: “Imperfection is beautiful!”

-Even when things are at their lowest, Adora is a jock with a heart of gold.

-Horde Prime and the Galactic Horde’s aesthetic feels like a mixture of Catholicism, Scientology, Heaven’s Gate, and modern Microsoft, and honestly, that just makes him creepier.

-Speaking of Horde Prime, he didn’t waste any time with destroying Bright Moon. …apparently.

-Furthermore, on the topic of his giant holographic messages, WAS THAT A FREAKING MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE MOVIE REFERENCE?!

-Boy, Glimmer and Catra sure got along quickly! It’s almost like they magically understand each other because they both assumed leadership roles and screwed up big time! …I guess.

         -Either that or this season is going to be a speedrun.

-Wow, the Rebellion sure got used to having a once-thought-dead king as well as a known enemy general/abuser running around their camp awful fast, didn’t they?

-Mara’s got a spaceship, a cyber girlfriend, a magic grandma, a dragon, a tragic backstory, AND a force ghost?! Dang, even in death, the girl’s got it all. No wonder everyone likes her!

-(*me looking at the TV rating at the start of episode*) “Why is language in there? Is there surprise cuss words or something in this season?” (*sees Horde Prime seize control of a clone for the first time*) “HOLY FREAKING SH—oh that’s why.”

-Applause to the crew for making the “dinner with Prime” scene for making a meal between a sparkly princess, a catgirl, and alien cult leader feel even more uncomfortable than it had a right to.

-(*me throughout the season whenever a clone was onscreen*) Is that Hordak? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him right there? Oh it is—oh no wait. … Is that h—

-Extra applause for having Glimmer learn from her grey-area wetwipe phase and refusing to sell out her friends again whilst telling the imperialist cult leader where to stick it.

-I would pay a sizeable portion of my life savings to hear what a Scorpia and Swift Wind duet would sound like.

         -In fact, I’d double it if it was just Scorpia singing.

         -Ah what the heck. I would triple it for an entire She-Ra musical!

-As happy as I am to see to see Entrapta interacting with the other princesses again, I have to say that their big reunion left me with some mixed feelings. Here’s a quick rundown:

         -Entrapta, a grown autistic woman, being led around on a leash by non-neurodivergent teenagers—again: that’s bad.

         -The Princesses confronting Entrapta about joining the Horde: that’s good!

         -The Princesses blaming all their problems with the Horde bots on Entrapta’s actions and her hyper fixations alone: that’s bad.

         -Entrapta explaining herself, admitting that she regrets her mistakes, and getting the Princesses to understand that she thinks and communicates differently, but in spite of that, she really does want help find Glimmer: that’s good!

         -Entrapta never gets to call out the Princesses for how poorly they treated her: that’s bad.

         -Entrapta saves the day and goes to space: that’s good!

         -Scorpia and Entrapta still haven’t interacted even though the former is with the Rebellion in the first place because she went to look for her because she is her best friend: …can I go home now?

-How nice! Michah finally got to shapeshift!

         -And he’s rocking that She-Ra outfit to boot!

-So is Darla a back up of Light Hope or do they just run on the same operating system and have the same voice?

-I could watch an entire season of Adora, Bow, and Entrapta going on space adventure in a rundown ship with their custom-made spacesuits, tbh.

-Is anyone else weirded out that Catra’s younger self looked at her in her flashback(?).

         -Actually what WAS happening there, anyhow?

-(*watching Bow’s spacewalk to save Glimmer*) “Is that a Gravity reference?” asked the man who never saw Gravity.

-Speaking of spacewalks, how did Glimmer survive those precious few seconds in space? Does the teleporter teleport a breathable atmosphere too?

         -Also, Catra, WHY did you think it would be a good idea to teleport Glimmer into space? I know you had a plan and the ship was right there but… Ah, never mind.

-Not that I’m complaining but Glimmer’s apology to the rest of the friend squad for her HORRIBLE plan last season went… surprisingly quickly.

-You know as cool as The Star Siblings are, being a quirky band of space-travelling siblings with cool powers and some trans rep to boot, I only have one small problem with them: weren’t there already Star Sisters on Etheria back in season 1?

         -That doesn’t sound right, but I don’t know enough about Masters of the Universe characters to dispute it.

-Entrapta confirmed pan, objectum, AND horny on main. Dang girl, you’re gonna have fun whether you got Hordak back or not…

-“The Velvet Glove” is both a menacing and stupid name for a decadent overlord’s mothership.

         -Wait, it’s from the 80’s canon? Oh. That kind of explains it, actually.

-Goshdangit, I wanted Catra to face punishment for her crimes, but I didn’t think that would involve going to evil alien conversion therapy!

         -Nor did I want her to die! For a second. Actually, since it obviously wasn’t going to last I was… weirdly okay with that part???

-Horde Prime seems awfully okay with Catradora. I mean he’s still super creepy and manipulative about it, but also oddly progressive for an evil brainwashing cult leader.

-(*Adora transforms into a She-Ra through seer will*) First of all, called it. Second of all, WOAH MAMA now that’s a glow up!

-Wrong Hordak did not have to be a thing, and yet, I’m glad that he is.

-Hordak remembers the LUVD crystal and Entrapta… Hordak remembers Entrap—! It’s happening! Oh my gosh, it’s happening! Everybody stay calm!

-Wow, Entrapta didn’t have to be so forgiving of Catra for everything she’s done to her but she did. Only I’m not sure if that was Entrapta taking the high road or the low road.

         -Or which road the crew took for that matter.

-I remember when I thought those “Chipped AUs” floating around here on tumblr were just something the fans came up with and that chipping people was not an actual despicable thing Prime does in canon. I miss those days.

-I know it’s not the same as before or the original design, but True She-Ra’s designs and powers? I think they slappin’.

-Hooray, Adora and Catra are finally making up! And it only took four and half seasons worth of communication failures, toxic villainous behaviour, and physical violence for Catra to snap out of it!

         -…We can go back to Entrapdak now, right?

-Poor Elberon. First they unknowingly adopt a double agent then get invaded by the Horde and now they’re getting brainwashed and chipped by the Galactic Horde. They might be a cute village, but they got some pretty lousy security.

-You know it’s cute that Micah is doing his best to be friends with Frosta and get back in touch with his dad-side, but look I can’t be the only one worried about how the local King is a less proactive leader than the princesses or the known war criminal/abuser, right?

-“The Perils of Peekablue” or as I like to call it, “You Thought ‘Boys Night Out’ Caught You Emotionally Off-guard? Hah! Watch This.”

-You know I didn’t think Scorpfuma would be a thing aside that one moment of flirting near the end of season 4, but they really pushed for it to be a thing! This is… actually pretty great! Perfuma’s not perfect, and I would have appreciated giving them a little more time to bond and form some real chemistry, but at least she reciprocates Scorpia’s sweetness instead of rebuffing it in increasingly aggressive fashion.

-I’m not sure what’s more concerning: that Mermista set a boat on fire, that it’s worded like she had a fling as part of some experimental phase, or that Sea Hawk is turned on by this.

-Peekablue might not be real, (I think?) but he is one dapper dude! Female-to-male redesigns could learn a thing or two from him.

-It involved them getting stung and seizuring, but that was a heck of a way to reintroduce Double Trouble! I swear I got watching them cycle through their transformations in some sort of physical reaction.

         -Or maybe that was just me worrying about their wellbeing…

-Okay, I get the Chips are huge, and actually rather clever threat, but how do these characters get chipped in the first place? I get there are chipped people who spread the chips throught the population but where do they get those from???

         -Do one of those Horde Prime drones just sneak behind someone, slap a chip on their nape then hand them a whole bagfull and say, “Beep boop beep, Horde Prime’s Light, blah blah blah. Alright have fun, kiddo”?

         -Or is it some sort of Alien: Covenant deal where they’re just floating around and Lord help you if one sticks to you?

-HOLY CRAP THEY ACTUALLY GOT SCORPIA TO SING! AND SHE WAS GREAT!

         -Oh shoot. Guess I owe the crew twice my life savings now…

-Entrapdak might be what got me into this show, but it’s Double Trouble that kept me around, so you can imagine how happy I was to see them make their grand reappearance!

-Conversly, you can imagine my disappointment when they just disappeared until the finale.

         -And on that note: HOW DID YOU GUYS LOSE DOUBLE TROUBLE?!

                  -You forgot to cherish them, didn’t you?

-So, Scorpia sacrifices herself just after finding a new girlfriend and gaining some newfound confidence, Mermista and Sea Hawk are split up,and Double Trouble didn’t join the main cast. Why can’t you just have fun like a normal cartoon, show?

-Gosh, I love me some shifting title cards!

-Is it just me or did they sneak in some more Annihilation references on Krytis?

         (-Said the guy who was too chicken to watch the movie and just read about it and watched a few clips online.)

-(*audibly sighs*) FINE. I guess I like Catradora now. Are you happy now, SPOP Crew? ARE YOU?!

-Hooray, Catra’s got a emotional support animal! And they’re a shapeshifting magic alien cat. Those are the best kind!

-Is it weird that I knew that weird glowing stuff on Krytis was just magic all along, or was it just not hidden very well. Anyways, I like Krytis. I like that we got to see a truly alien world with its own form of magic.

-Plus, we got a logical advancement of the magic versus science subtheme with magic being Horde Prime’s weakness! Neato!

-Getting back on the “which is worse?” wagon for a second, I don’t know what feels less right: that Wrong Hordak’s big revelation and his resolution to free himself and his brothers and friends from Horde Prime’s control is played humorously, or that Real Hordak should be the one having this moment.

-That bit with Castaspella and Shadow Weaver where she tells Casta about Etheria being a living thing with inherent magical property, or whatever, while we got a peaceful shot of some boar creatures sleeping was actually kind of nice. It would have been nicer though if it wasn’t part of a power hungry abuser’s obvious scheme. If only there was a kindly old witch lady character who was in touch with nature and knew just what to say when someone was feeling downOH WAIT.

-Furthermore… Why did Shadow Weaver and Castaspella need to have romantic tension?

-Seriously though, where’s our Madame Razz quota this season? Where’s my supportive magic grandma timelord at, yo?

-Yup, they speedran this season.

-I’m actually really disappointed we didn’t see more of an intergalactic new rebellion rising up to fight Horde Prime’s forces across the universe. Especially if it meant we got to see more Star Sibling action!

-Again, I adore Wrong Hordak but I keep wondering what was keeping the crew from just bringing in Original Flavour Hordak. (You know, aside from teasing us Entrapdak fans and trying to distract us with a loveable new character in the meantime.) I mean he could have done the whole infiltrating the clone squads and tricking them bit, too.

         -Heck, he could have done the wink, too!

-I’d gleefully point out Loo-Kee’s cameo this season but apparently, they already made some several seasons ago. That’s what I get for not rewatching the 80’s show and training my eyes first.

-(*sees Erelandians*) Are those freaking Toads and Toadettes?

-So, what’s keeping them from just hitting Spinerella’s chip again? Besides emotional baggage and gale force winds, I mean.

-Perfuma coming out of a cave scared out of her wits, demanding to know who’s there, clinging to her friends as soon as they come back, and balling her eyes out is a big, BIG mood.

-Frosta absolutely decking Catra in the face was nestled somewhere between cathartic and excessive.

         -Netossa spraying her with a bottle of water on the other hand…

-Oh, so Greyskull was the name of a Rebel Squad! I think. Meh, the important thing is we got an explanation and it still sounds cool.

-Leave it to a couple of dads to make a secret message out of a dad joke.

-You know I made fun of Light Hope for being creepy, but I swear that avatar from the Spire is even creepier. I don’t know if it’s her face—those dang blank eyes, man—or just that it she’s less animated than the real thing, but it just felt… off.

-Aww, Noelle made Netossa’s princess weakness illustrations! So cute!

-Forget episodes that deserves Emmys, Keston John deserves one for voicing Hordak, Horde Prime, all the clones, and several minor villains and giving each and every single one a distinct voice! Where my king’s respect, eh?

-Yes, Catra you had a small disagreement with Hordak. …Over sending his girlfriend and your “friend” to DIE IN A LITERAL LIVING HELL.

         -Sorry, I just had to get that out of my system.

-Why does Perfuma get pressured to get angry and go wild when Entrapta’s the one who’s had it the worst out of all them? Why can’t my gamer girl go berserk, dammit!?

-Okay, but really, how do these fricking chips work??? Are they parasite devices who store Horde Prime’s Baptizing Dew then slowly pump it into their host’s bodies? Do they have their own nervous systems? Are they technorganic? Also, how and why do we need to make these chips are bigger threat then they need to be?

-Horde Prime showing up on Hordak’s throne in grand Killing Joke style and casually throwing shades at his brother’s overblown attempts to impress him is pretty awesome, but it feels strangely underdeveloped. Hordak’s not there to have his hard work insulted and we never got to see Adora have any similar encounter with Hordak here before, so unless you look at it from the perspective of someone who has been here before in the Horde story like Catra it lacks the dramatic weight it should have had.

-Scorpia resisting the chip to save her new friends was pretty great, though.

-I swear, when they got to the scene where Adora and the others figured out that Shadow Weaver was grooming her so she could use her to get to the Heart of Etheria, I was mouthing “You B***H” through the whole thing.

-They really brought back Etherian deep magic just so they had something to make Micah threatening. …okay.

-Okay, the rest of “Failsafe” messed me up, so here’s a rundown on all the other messy thoughts I had while the show ripped my heart and ground it to dog food:

         -Entrapta and Hordak reuniting: Yay!

         -Swift Wind yanking her away before she can get through to him: Boo.

         -Catra encouraging Adora to try and take care of herself for a change: Yay!

         -Adora hurts Catra and she runs away: Boo.

         -Adora finally calling out Shadow Weaver on what an utterly horrible person she is: Yay!

         -Adora resolves to risk sacrificing herself to save the world: Bo—okay, seriously, was all this suffering really necessary, show?

-I know I mentioned in my previous She-Ra random thoughts that I supported Glimmadora, but I am okay with Catradora and Glimbow ending up canon. The only problem I have is how rushed they feel—moreso with Glimbow. With Catradora, the crew had an entire season to make it work again and they took it. Glimbow it feels like they were down to the last few episodes and went, “Oh right, we were gonna do something with these two!” then did their darndest to fit in some chemistry in between all the other stuff going down.

-As ominous as it was, the music where Horde Prime starts hacking Etheria honestly SLAPS.

-Okay, I know everyone is magic or something, but I am legit surprised getting electrocuted in water didn’t kill the heroes right then and there.

-Sea Hawk tries to flirt with his girl even as she’s trying to kill him. Truly, he is a man of taste.

-What do you know, Shadow Weaver can only do good when she’s (canonically!) punch drunk.

-You know a whole lot of this could have been avoided if Holo-Mara was Adora’s mentor instead of Light Hope.

-When I think about it, it was actually really clever to make Horde Prime the final villain for Adora to face: a domineering decadent man who’s been in power forever against a humble emotionally vulnerable compassionate young woman.

         -Not to mention the divide between cult-like oppression and progressive freedom. Or something.

-Holy crap, did the First Ones get a great freaking a Great Old One for a guard dog?!

-So, you guys seriously didn’t bring Angella back to reunite with her family OR mention her all season after the impact her death had on everyone all last season until Glimmer needs a power-up at the last possible minute and then you never bring her up again. That is absolutely a dick move in bird culture.

-Entrapta’s hacker sticker gives me life. Gamer girl gremlin princess forever!

-On the one hand, I’m disappointed that Adora and Catra don’t get to have an awesome couple battle against the security monster and win. On the other hand, Shadow Weaver is finally dead. YAY!

         -With apologies to the writers and especially Lorraine Toussaint. She did splendidly bringing this character to life and even if I hated Shadow Weaver, I adored the effort she put into making her one of the most emotionally complex villains I’ve ever seen.

-Words cannot, will not, and will never describe the pure joy that I experienced when I first saw Hordak’s big scene: standing up to and disowning his tyrant brother, saving Entrapta, declaring his love to her (albeit in a nicely lowkey fashion), and then throwing Horde Prime to his apparent doom Disney style with Entrapta cheering him with sheer glee. GOSH, it was everything I could have hoped for from this season!

         -Now if only they kept the deleted scene where they got a moment to themselves before Prime body-jacked him again like the creepy sonuvabich he is.

-Horde Prime just wouldn’t be a religious villain if he didn’t tell everyone to burn.

         -Bonus points for actually trying to burn the frigging planet.

-Aside from the idea of Adora switching to wearing a She-Ra themed dress everywhere in the future, the future vision was really quite sweet, and seeing Prime step in to ruin it made it all the more impactful.

-Can I just say that it’s absolutely wonderful that the show, for all it’s flaws, said  “**** senseless heroic sacrifices”?

-BREAKING: Lesbian cat finally makes up with her jock ex, has a canon kiss so pure it saves the world!

         -In other news, Catradora fans are still spoiled rotten.

-Wow, look at all those character comebacks they skipped through! Look, there’s the chefs from Dryl, Double Trouble, Huntara, the Horde Trio, Imp, Madame Razz—are you kidding me?!

-Grumbling aside, I actually find the idea of the Horde Trio and Imp getting involved in a G-rated science-fantasy version of the first Hangover movie quite amusing.

-Oh dang, they pulled a Castle in the Sky with the Velvet Glove!

-As nice as it was to see Aodra save Hordak from Horde Prime and destroy the latter through exorcism via sheer compassion, I’m rather disappointed we never got to see She-Ra go full Metal Gear Solid Rising: Revengence on any creepy old cult leaders.

         -Yeah, it would have gone against the “love conquers all” set up, but love takes on many forms, does it not? So, why can it not manifest as cleaving your mortal enemies with extreme prejudice to save your loved ones?

-Furthermore, in addition to Holo-Mara being a better mentor, Hordak raising Adora instead Shadow Weaver could have prevented a lot of similar problems. Maybe. Possibly.

         -Eh whatever, he has a lifetime’s worth of fanfiction to make up for it.

-ENTRAPDAK IS CANON, ALL IS RIGHT WITH THE WORLD.

-And so is Catradora and Glimbow! That’s nice, too.

-Aww, how sweet of them to skip through Catra and Scorpia, and Glimmer and Micah’s big reunions! It’s not like we’ve been waiting forever for this stuff or anything. HahahahAHAHAHDHAHAHFHAFHKSADJHFKAJHDfine.

-And so it all ends with everyone either friends, in love, or both, as heroes decide to make up for it all with a grandiose sequel promising more exciting space adventures we probably won’t see! HOORAY!

-All snarky ranting aside, I actually really enjoyed the finale. It was exciting, heartwarming, and above all it ended on happy, hopeful note without leaving too many frustrating questions unanswered. (*glares with utmost contempt at Voltron and Star vs. The Forces of Evil*)

-You know, this wasn’t bad for a final season, but I think this might have worked better as two seasons. Not in Netflix’s cheap “split a regular 13-episode season in two 6-7 episode long seasons” strategy, but I mean two full seasons with their own storylines leading up to the grand finale:

         -First, one that starts out with Horde Prime’s arrival the downfall of Etheria, focuses on the space adventures, ends with their return to Etheria and gives the characters time to recuperate from season 4.

         -Then, we have one final season that focuses on the Best Friend Squad’s Return to Etheria, Horde Prime’s plan, gives everyone more time to properly reconcile before ¾ of the entire cast gets chipped, sets up a new Rebellion made up of Princess Alliance and former Etherian Horde members, maybe even set up a proper Hordak redemption arc or something, and then our big happy ending.

-On a mostly unrelated note, I also feel that the whole show could have turned out even better if it had been either a dedicated science-fantasy war drama with some levity (like the good Star Wars shows or Avatar: The Last Airbender) or a lighthearted yet empowering slice-of-life action-adventure romcom (i.e. basically a well-made remake of the original show in the style of Adventure Time and Parks and Rec or something).

-My final random thought for this whole thing: we really could have used a triumphant end credits song or something. Aside from obviously recommending Fabulous Secret Powers, I would have also recommended the original 4 Non Blondes “What’s Going On,” a reprise of “Warriors,” Gorillaz’s “We Got the Power,” or (my favourite) Talking Head’s “(Nothing But) Flowers” since the ending scenes remind me of it.

Thanks again to the crew for giving me something to live for and/or complain about!

Now, let’s hope the He-Man reboots do as well...

[nahimjustfeelingit-writes]

Imagine:

Erik sending the Reader vids of him beating his dick and he nuts on the screen

Warnings: SMUT

Okay so the last one was appealed llab. It’s the gif I posted with it which was perfect and tumblr wants to fuck shit up. ANYWAYYSSSSSS enjoy this nasty smutty love that my beautiful friend @goddessofthundathighs wrote up and let me tell you it’s good 😩😩😩😩😩💦

Like, Comment, Reblog 💖

New Moon. Your favorite time of the month because it allowed you to cleanse yourself old old energy and set new goals and manifestations for the weeks to come. This particular new moon fell on your favorite day of the week: Self-Care Sunday. You had already spent the day pampering and treating yourself with a fresh mani/pedi and new weave, now it was time for your spiritual bath. Since you and Erik had just called it quits, you decided to focus on love. You started by saging your bathroom, making sure to focus on the corners and around the doorway. Next, you added 6 drops of jasmine oil and honey to the water; 6 being the number of love. You then added your rose bath salts and rose quartz stones to the bath. You finally lit your jasmine incense and submerged yourself in the water.

On all night // quarter five //

I’d be insane if I let you hit // I need you

Should be here // For my regretful morning

The sweet scent of the Strawberry Pound Cake candle you recently purchased from Bath & Body Works invaded your nostrils along with the jasmine as your body sank down into your bath. You closed your eyes and began visualizing yourself in a loving relationship while placing the rose quartz over your heart. You had your Me & Somebody’s Son playlist on full blast and were currently being serenaded by Ari Lennox when your phone buzzed against the toilet.

“You up?”

You stared at the words that accompanied the lewd video before rolling your eyes in annoyance. Of course Satan Incarnate would text you some shit like this while you were trying to relax. Jackass.

Though you were no longer an item, he knew how much watching him jerk off turned you on. You loved the way his face scrunched up in pleasure, his bottom lip wedged between his teeth sent a chill straight to your core. Damn him! You had half a mind to ignore the message and roll back over until those 3 dots appeared again.

“If you gone ignore a nigga, at least turn ya read receipts off, y/n.”

“Nigga fuck you!” Your fingers fired back before they found their way between your legs.

Up late, again // Head on my chest, hand on my ass //

Up late, again // Back it up on you, breathing fast //

Oh, up late again, yeah // Tell me how it is when back it up there // It up there (mmh)

“That’s what I want you to do,” he responds with the grinning devil emoji followed by another video. You hesitantly clicked play, only to find him stroking himself faster and now moaning your name.

“This dick misses you, y/n. Daddy misses the way them walls hug mah shit when you ridin’ and the way that fat ass bounce up and down.”

You were really turned on, now. He was completely naked except the thick Cuban link choker around his neck and the gold pinky rings you got him last Christmas. He had been back home so his accent was heavy on his words. It made your pussy throb. His tongue passed over his bottom grill as his hand squeezed his thick shaft. Your mouth watered as you watched the beads of pre-cum ooze from his tip. That was the last straw before you stood from the bath and took a seat on the side of the tub. You grabbed the shower head, turning it to the massage setting before placing it between your legs. You mewled as the water pulsed against your already throbbing clit and were just finding your groove before your phone buzzed again. Another message accompanied by another video.

“You playin’ wit mah pussy, y/n? You know you can’t do dat without Daddy’s permission.”

“You ain’t my Daddy no more..”

“I’m always Daddy, you just stubborn.”

Erik was always unnecessarily arrogant. You loved and hated that about him. He was one of those niggas that knew he was fine and had no problems flaunting his good looks. It was the one thing you two argued about the most. You hated the way women fawned over him and how he ate up the attention. He always dismissed your claims, accusing you of being insecure. He was a certified asshole, but he was yours and you missed him.

Make your easy to North Hollywood // Target lingerie //

Kissing your lips // Dipped in Backwood tips

I been crushing on you // We can fake watch the news, if you like

You watched the videos on a constant loop, allowing the shower head to bring you closer and closer to your peak. You were almost there when another message came through.

“Come see me..”

You stopped. Although you wanted him to break your back like a glow stick, you knew how things would eventually end. You and Erik were a never ending cycle of toxicity and although the dick was bomb, you didn’t want to bring that into this next phase of your life. You placed the shower head back in it’s holster before stepping out of the shower. Your inner freak was cursing your entire existence, but you knew you had made the right decision. You wrapped a towel around yourself before grabbing your homemade Shea Butter to moisturize your skin. He sent more videos, but you ignored them as you got ready for bed. You were about to power it off for the night when a final message caught your attention.

“This could’ve been you, but you playin’..” You clicked play on the video only to be met with ropes of his cum shooting towards your face. His moan was deep, animalistic almost as he finished himself off. He smirked devilishly at the screen, revealing his fronts before speaking again.

“Wanna lick it off? I know you want to, ma. I know that mouth is drooling right now. Damn, girl, you just love being stubborn when you could have been on your knees catching all my nut in that pretty little mouth. Got me cumming on my phone.” Erik thumbed some cum from his phone screen, rubbing it along the tip of his dick slowly. “You see that? That’s your mess to clean up. Keep playing with me if you want to. Watch how you come running to Daddy.”

You wanted to resist, but your inner freak couldn’t be sated by your fingers and vibrator alone. Erik had permanently ruined sex for you, his arrogance and nastiness were in a league of their own. He was the only man that had ever made you cum just from talking. You quickly slipped into your favorite Fashion Nova lingerie set and grabbed your keys from the nightstand. He FaceTimed you as you slid behind the wheel of your pearl white Porsche Panamera, the only one of its kind in the garage of your apartment building.

“Yes Daddy?” You answered sweetly.

“Thought I wasn’t Daddy no more,” he replied with a smug grin that made you roll your eyes.

“You want me to come through or nah? Cuz I can get back in my bed,” you snap.

“Get back in the bed, then, y/n. I ain’t the one that wanna cum right now.”

You shot a piercing glare to your phone screen, which made his grin even more smug.

“Yeeah, that lil pussy throbbin’ ain’t she? She wanna feel this thick ass tongue sliding up and down, fuckin’ that lil hole like I would wit my dick, don’t she? Yeah. You want Daddy’s face all in it, my beard soakin’ wet wit ya juices. Don’t be shy, you can tell Daddy what you want.”

You bit your lip, staring at the phone with pleading eyes as he spoke.

“You want this dick, pretty girl? Just say the word and I’ll be on my way. I know how much you miss ridin’ this dick in my G Wagon.”

You whimpered uncontrollably at the thought of the last time he fucked you in the back of his truck. He had your legs on his shoulders, digging out your pussy like he was searching for a buried treasure. Even when you came, his powerful thrusts didn’t stop.

“Spread dem legs fa me.”

Without hesitation you did as you were told, reclining your seat back so that he had an unobstructed view of your dripping wet center.

“You gone make dat pussy cum fa Daddy? You gone make a mess in ya front seat like I did in this chair?”

“Yes, Daddy,” you moaned as you drove 3 of your fingers into your entrance. Under his commands you flicked and fucked yourself until you squirted all over your front seat and phone screen. You were so caught up in your pleasure that you didn’t realize he had left his place until you heard 3 raps on your window. You readjusted your clothes before rolling the window down, only to be met with his fat, throbbing dick.

“Give Daddy’s dick a kiss, pretty girl.”

@tgigoldie @soufcakmistress @chefjessypooh @chaneajoyyy @pananegra @theblulife @becincere @blaqwidow91 @fish-outta-watah @eyeknowmywrites @crowngold @njadakillthiscookie @blktinkerbell @luvanxi @sheisexcellent1 @chocolatedippedinhoney @brandithecrystalgem @dababydababydababydababy @soulfulbeauty19 @btitannaaa @sunkissedebony97 @youngblackndgifted @harleycativy @rbhp @thee-germanpeach @thadelightfulone @palmstreesallday @skylahb @bakaris-shorty @nizzle-mo @truglori @queenflaws @ljstraightnochaser @theegoldenchild @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @nickidub718 @vikkidc @thehomierobbstark @rent-emspoons​ @abluesforlyssa @abeautifulmindexposed @fd-writes @chasingsunlight​ @sickaddiktions @munteanhore @xo-goldengirl @tiava143 @33kiara​ @honeytoffee @asiasblackworld727 @momobaby227 @informalmelancholy @soulshinechronicles @hearteyes-for-killmonger @goddessofthundathighs @soulfxll @whazzzupmyhitta

[goddessofthundathighs]

UP LATE

This was an imagine originally given to @nahimjustfeelingit-writes in which Erik sends the reader videos of him masturbating. She couldn’t figure out how to start it so I decided to try my hand at it, and thus, this filth was born. 😈😘

**

New Moon. Your favorite time of the month because it allowed you to cleanse yourself old old energy and set new goals and manifestations for the weeks to come. This particular new moon fell on your favorite day of the week: Self-Care Sunday. You had already spent the day pampering and treating yourself with a fresh mani/pedi and new weave, now it was time for your spiritual bath. Since you and Erik had just called it quits, you decided to focus on love. You started by saging your bathroom, making sure to focus on the corners and around the doorway. Next, you added 6 drops of jasmine oil and honey to the water; 6 being the number of love. You then added your rose bath salts and rose quartz stones to the bath. You finally lit your jasmine incense and submerged yourself in the water.

On all night // quarter five //

I’d be insane if I let you hit // I need you

Should be here // For my regretful morning

The sweet scent of the Strawberry Pound Cake candle you recently purchased from Bath & Body Works invaded your nostrils along with the jasmine as your body sank down into your bath. You closed your eyes and began visualizing yourself in a loving relationship while placing the rose quartz over your heart. You had your Me & Somebody’s Son playlist on full blast and were currently being serenaded by Ari Lennox when your phone buzzed against the toilet.

“You up?”

You stared at the words that accompanied the lewd video before rolling your eyes in annoyance. Of course Satan Incarnate would text you some shit like this while you were trying to relax. Jackass.

Though you were no longer an item, he knew how much watching him jerk off turned you on. You loved the way his face scrunched up in pleasure, his bottom lip wedged between his teeth sent a chill straight to your core. Damn him! You had half a mind to ignore the message and roll back over until those 3 dots appeared again.

“If you gone ignore a nigga, at least turn ya read receipts off, y/n.”

“Nigga fuck you!” Your fingers fired back before they found their way between your legs.

Up late, again // Head on my chest, hand on my ass //

Up late, again // Back it up on you, breathing fast //

Oh, up late again, yeah // Tell me how it is when back it up there // It up there (mmh)

“That’s what I want you to do,” he responds with the grinning devil emoji followed by another video. You hesitantly clicked play, only to find him stroking himself faster and now moaning your name.

“This dick misses you, y/n. Daddy misses the way them walls hug mah shit when you ridin’ and the way that fat ass bounce up and down.”

You were really turned on, now. He was completely naked except the thick Cuban link choker around his neck and the gold pinky rings you got him last Christmas. He had been back home so his accent was heavy on his words. It made your pussy throb. His tongue passed over his bottom grill as his hand squeezed his thick shaft. Your mouth watered as you watched the beads of pre-cum ooze from his tip. That was the last straw before you stood from the bath and took a seat on the side of the tub. You grabbed the shower head, turning it to the massage setting before placing it between your legs. You mewled as the water pulsed against your already throbbing clit and were just finding your groove before your phone buzzed again. Another message accompanied by another video.

“You playin’ wit mah pussy, y/n? You know you can’t do dat without Daddy’s permission.”

“You ain’t my Daddy no more..”

“I’m always Daddy, you just stubborn.”

Erik was always unnecessarily arrogant. You loved and hated that about him. He was one of those niggas that knew he was fine and had no problems flaunting his good looks. It was the one thing you two argued about the most. You hated the way women fawned over him and how he ate up the attention. He always dismissed your claims, accusing you of being insecure. He was a certified asshole, but he was yours and you missed him.

Make your easy to North Hollywood // Target lingerie //

Kissing your lips // Dipped in Backwood tips

I been crushing on you // We can fake watch the news, if you like

You watched the videos on a constant loop, allowing the shower head to bring you closer and closer to your peak. You were almost there when another message came through.

“Come see me..”

You stopped. Although you wanted him to break your back like a glow stick, you knew how things would eventually end. You and Erik were a never ending cycle of toxicity and although the dick was bomb, you didn’t want to bring that into this next phase of your life. You placed the shower head back in it’s holster before stepping out of the shower. Your inner freak was cursing your entire existence, but you knew you had made the right decision. You wrapped a towel around yourself before grabbing your homemade Shea Butter to moisturize your skin. He sent more videos, but you ignored them as you got ready for bed. You were about to power it off for the night when a final message caught your attention.

“This could’ve been you, but you playin’..”

You clicked play on the video only to be met with ropes of his cum shooting towards your face. His moan was deep, animalistic almost as he finished himself off. He smirked devilishly at the screen, revealing his fronts before speaking again.

“Wanna lick it off? I know you want to, ma. I know that mouth is drooling right now. Damn, girl, you just love being stubborn when you could have been on your knees catching all my nut in that pretty little mouth. Got me cumming on my phone.”

Erik thumbed some cum from his phone screen, rubbing it along the tip of his dick slowly.

“You see that? That’s your mess to clean up. Keep playing with me if you want to. Watch how you come running to Daddy.”

You wanted to resist, but your inner freak couldn’t be sated by your fingers and vibrator alone. Erik had permanently ruined sex for you, his arrogance and nastiness were in a league of their own. He was the only man that had ever made you cum just from talking. You quickly slipped into your favorite Fashion Nova lingerie set and grabbed your keys from the nightstand. He FaceTimed you as you slid behind the wheel of your pearl white Porsche Panamera, the only one of its kind in the garage of your apartment building.

“Yes Daddy?” You answered sweetly.

“Thought I wasn’t Daddy no more,” he replied with a smug grin that made you roll your eyes.

“You want me to come through or nah? Cuz I can get back in my bed,” you snap.

“Get back in the bed, then, y/n. I ain’t the one that wanna cum right now.”

You shot a piercing glare to your phone screen, which made his grin even more smug.

“Yeeah, that lil pussy throbbin’ ain’t she? She wanna feel this thick ass tongue sliding up and down, fuckin’ that lil hole like I would wit my dick, don’t she? Yeah. You want Daddy’s face all in it, my beard soakin’ wet wit ya juices. Don’t be shy, you can tell Daddy what you want.”

You bit your lip, staring at the phone with pleading eyes as he spoke.

“You want this dick, pretty girl? Just say the word and I’ll be on my way. I know how much you miss ridin’ this dick in my G Wagon.”

You whimpered uncontrollably at the thought of the last time he fucked you in the back of his truck. He had your legs on his shoulders, digging out your pussy like he was searching for a buried treasure. Even when you came, his powerful thrusts didn’t stop.

“Spread dem legs fa me.”

Without hesitation you did as you were told, reclining your seat back so that he had an unobstructed view of your dripping wet center.

“You gone make dat pussy cum fa Daddy? You gone make a mess in ya front seat like I did in this chair?”

“Yes, Daddy,” you moaned as you drove 3 of your fingers into your entrance. Under his commands you flicked and fucked yourself until you squirted all over your front seat and phone screen. You were so caught up in your pleasure that you didn’t realize he had left his place until you heard 3 raps on your window. You readjusted your clothes before rolling the window down, only to be met with his fat, throbbing dick.

“Give Daddy’s dick a kiss, pretty girl.”

[watchtheworldargue]

egg magazine, april 1990. interview with Michael Hutchence

transcription below :)

Michael Hutchence on Lower Broadway

By Hal Rubenstein \ Photography by Steven Meisel

Globe-hopping is hell on a wardrobe and hard on the feet. Sometimes you have to get out of the limo to spend your money.

Michael Hutchence rarely comes to New York without luggage monogrammed INXS or Max Q, so one would think that on a visit without portfolio, the last thing he'd want to do is add on more baggage. But given a free day, a book of tickets, and our offer to go anywhere to do anything, Hutchence got into the limo with an agenda we could hardly call a new sensation. What kept us from sulking was that he hadn't left the devil outside.

Michael: You think we can load this car up with Yamamoto, Comme des Garcons, and Armani by 6?

Hal: Driver, step on it. Down to Grand and make a left.

[The car turns onto Union Square West.]

Isn't there a club on the corner here?

The Underground.

That's the one that keeps surviving regardless of how many people get shot there. How many are they up to?

No one's quite sure.

Where are we now? I don't recognise this.

This strip of lower Broadway didn't exist last time you were here. Now it's like a mall-less town's Main Street.

And Tower Records is City Hall. Not bad. It's wild to see this much activity because people around the world now talk about New York in terms of decay, how New York is such a rude place, and we keep telling them, No, New Yorkers are quite friendly, we like it there. New Yorkers are just very honest. They don't have time to bullshit. I like New York because people are linked to each other. L.A. Is fun, but segregated. Here there is a metro, and a different philosophy of getting around so there's rich upon poor upon rich. The only thing I don't remember is how many homeless are asleep on Park Avenue and everywhere else. Or is it my imagination?

No, it's real. How come you choose to live in Hong Kong instead of Australia?

For about three years, I thought it didn't matter where I lived. But I kept passing through it again. I grew up there, from when I was four until twelve. My dad still lives there. It has great energy, like New York. And it's ten hours closer to the world than Australia is. If you travel a lot, it adds up.

[We enter the Yohji Yamamoto store.]

So austere. Do they go wild if you hand back anything wrinkled? Those clothes over there are good acid-house colors. Has acid house caught on here?

Not like in England.

That's 'cause New York has bad radio. Are these dogs always here? They must sleep in the shoes. Ooh, look at these here. Not very me, but very Star Trek. $500 for a T-shirt. I see. I'll buy six. No, twelve. Now, here is something very stagy. Ultraflouncy. I like that, but the general consensus might kill my career.

Is what you wear onstage the same as you wear off?

I sort of smush them all together. My favorite piece of clothing is a leather jacket I had made for me that says “Hutch” in chain mail on the back.

Did Michael Schmidt make it for you?

Yeah – how'd you know? He's great. He sort of looks like a beautiful snake. He loves all the Hollywood stuff, but he's so sincere when he talks about it. Almost makes me like it. Is there somewhere funkier we can go, like Yankel's House of Pile? I saw that on the way down.

If you want old clothes, we should go to Cheap Jack's.

[We head back up to Broadway and 13th Street. Several young ladies on the corner stare at Hutchence as he enters Cheap Jack's.]

Do you enjoy recognition?

Depends on where I am.

Like when you're out on your own. Shopping, for instance.

Shopping, yeah, 'cause I get discounts. And there is a definite bonus to recognition when I'm onstage.

It makes the night go faster. But I'm not an institution yet. Sometimes I think about how hard it must be for someone like Bob Hope to go for a stroll. I don't really get hassled. I can stand in the middle of a street in London, or even New York, and usually nothing happens. I don't think I have that distinctive of a face. I got recognized in Tangier once, going by in a taxi, very fast … from a distance … in a fog … during monsoon season. Just kidding. It's odd how once you are conscious of being watched, you stop being so self-conscious because you realize there's nothing you can do about it. Of course, nobody in Hong Kong gives a shit who I am.

Aren't people there freaking about the city's eventual realignment with China?

Thousands are leaving a year, but they're the ones who can afford to leave, to give Australia half a million to let them in, though a lot more are going to Vancouver or New Zealand instead because they've heard, and it's fairly true, about Australia's racism.

It's actually more like unconscious racism. There's a naivete to it that you might call charming if it wasn't so sick. See, most foreigners don't realize – because we refuse to believe it ourselves – that Australia is southern Asia. Australia is linked to England in everyone's minds.

Yet most Australians don't have the faintest idea why the Japanese tried to invade us during the Second World War, and can't understand why they might not have wanted any foreigners on the biggest island in the Asian paradise. If we had lost, my home would be covered in rice paddies by now. Australia would have been Japan's Great Plains, their grain barrel.

I've never met one Australian who knows that. We have it so easy in Australia. It's very easy to live there. Tougher than it was before, but that's because five years ago it was ridiculous. I used to live in a three-story, five-bedroom house. It cost me $20 a week.

Did you make that much playing music?

Nah, but so what, we were all on the dole. Everyone went on it. That's one of the reasons you have so many bands in Australia. It's cheap to live and collect, so all the bands go on it. You wouldn't even have to go pick up your employment check; they'd mail it to you or transfer it to your account. Ready cash. I guess because there is such an anti-authoritarian vibe in Australia that people are quite happy to accept government checks. “Aw, screw 'em” - that's the attitude. Lots of people accept four and five checks or even have jobs. It's very lax. That's why we're stuck with the tall-poppy syndrome.

Translation?

Don't be successful, don't rise above your mates, or you'll get chopped. It's weird. It's the don't-leave-the-pub way of life. I think people in America are generally happy for someone's good fortune; they know how to let themselves go. In Australia, they go, “Good, mate,” and don't ask a single question. There are no celebrations for a job well done. I'm still shocked at how Americans cheer you on when they like you. I know you don't fancy it anymore, but I like phrases like “dress for success.”

And that's why you're shopping here?

I love hideous ties. Girls love 'em. Dunno why. Its like red socks. Are the playing Richard Hell? I haven't heard this song in 20 years. God, you must hear better music in clothing stores than you do anywhere else in New York. All these baseball jackets are so cheap. You know what they pay for these in Australia? I should buy the whole lot, take them back. I'd never have to tour again. I could get 150 to 200 bucks just for the ratty ones. I think this is the first clothing store I've been in that wasn't playing videos.

Are videos big in Australia?

We've actually been involved in music video a whole lot longer than in America. Because we are so far away, the only way we've had to understand all this music flying around the world is through video. Since the '50s, even when it was only 10 minutes a week, Aussie tv has been showing music videos.

And we don't censor the way you guys do. The “Way of the World” single is a very serious song, but MTV is quite shy of the video, you should note – I say this diplomatically. They censor here for all the wrong reasons. Like it's okay to stare at Cher's crotch for four minutes, but it's hard to say something truthful about the state of the world.

Could it be because with a group that's become as wildly successful as INXS has, it's inevitable that favorable reaction always turns?

I don't think INXS has reached that point yet. Give us four more years. We've only recently become hip in England. At the beginning, they hated our guts.

Why?

'Cause we are Australians writing pop music, why else? They don't make much in England, apart from nice jumpers and Jaguars, and one of the few things they can claim some turf on is pop music. So, they're not happy when someone else does it. It's a standard trait of island people; they're very territorial.

But you guys are island people too.

Yeah, but we got a bigger island. Now, if we can just get rid of some competition from the expatriate colonies.

Isn't it enough already with this rivalry between Australia and England? L.A. And New York have settled their feud.

England still treats Australia like we're descendants of convicts. Well, I guess we are, aren't we? We're trying to get rid of them, but unfortunately, they're coming back with money and buying up half the country. Don't you resent the Japanese buying Rockefeller Center?

I resent the Rockefellers more.

[Having tried on everything and bought nothing, Hutchence decides against old clothes. We head down to If boutique.]

Armand Basi. Nice stuff. That Claude Montana is fabulous, but God, this stuff is expensive. We don't know anyone here for a discount, do we? My father used to design clothes for a shop in Hong Kong called Dynasty. Glitzy evening wear for too much money. One year, when we did our first tour, we bough ta lot of Sprouse, real colorful stuff, and we spent a fortune, especially when you consider it's disposable fashion. All it had to do was last a month. All the buttons fell off, it shrunk, seams opened up. We would have been more upset, but it made us homesick for the mother country. Disposable fashion is very English. The nice thing about it when it comes from there, however, is that even though the stuff falls apart, it's cheap.

Ah, I like this. Very sexy, very smart. Basi, right? I found the best underwear. I think it's called Nikos. Someone gave it to me last night. Well, that's a plug. No names, please. These pants might go with the Basi shirt. [Like Navy pants, they have over a dozen buttons instead of a fly.] Not good clubwear. Certainly not quick enough to please me.

Your choice of underwear would have to be very discreet.

And always clean. Maybe these pants come with a catheter. Should I ask the shopgirl? [He raises his arm to call her and, wincing, puts it down.]

Just realized a colostomy bag wouldn't hurt?

No. I think I have a cracked rib, from too much fun the other night at Inflation, this super club in Melbourne. Melbourne has some of the best clubs in the world. Great people. Amazing clubs. Sydney has nothing. Boring as hell. Nice place if you're a surfer. Really pretty, like L.A. But very corrupt, Sydney. Everyone is always paying everyone off. That's why you can't afford to do a club there. It's like, in order to get a club license, all the other nightclub owners have to agree to your having a license. And four people control the voting on that. Melbourne now has a club called Razor that is so exciting. It used to an automobile club, especially popular during the '50s, where people used to talk about their cars, you know, with photos of Mini-Minors making hairpin turns around corners. Like a racing club, I guess, except for slower cars. Razor gets the best people.

[He picks up a pair of huge, get-lost-in-the-rain-forest-and-survive black shoes and delights.]

Many people have shoe fetishes. I guess it's around the world actually, not just with Imelda. I think people are probably just jealous of her because they secretly wanted so many pair. But these are big, like size big. Are Americans getting larger feet, or do they just want more room? I always notice shoes when I'm here.

There's almost like a $100 tax on shoes in Australia. Like a pair that will cost you $50 here will cost you almost $200 in Australia. A pair of Levi's cost $100. I never buy furniture in Australia, either, and I have an obsession with furniture the way Americans love shoes. It's a shame I don't have an obsession with homes, too, since I have no place to put all the furniture. I have it stored all over the world.

Let me get the Basi shirt, and then I want to buy records. I would get them later, but I just remembered I have a friend coming in tonight for only one night. He and his father are trying to get down to Nicaragua. They're helping Ortega keep the Contras back. Good luck. What's so weird about their going is that these guys are publishing magnates in England. Entrepreneurs. They should be serious Thatcherites, but they just hate Thatcher. Real lefties.

If everyone is so vocal of their dislike of her, how come she's so strong?

The British love her because they love to be miserable; they love to complain. Thatcher's become irrepressible. She's finally showing signs of faltering, except she's winning by default, because no one wants to put Kinnock in, either. It's like your Dan Quayle. What an alternative.

Are Australians political?

It's compulsory to vote, if you want to call that political. Frankly, nobody particularly gives a fuck. That doesn't mean Australians are not aware people. I think they know more about what's going on in the rest of the world than the average American, but that's because they have to compensate for being in the middle of nowhere. They're more concerned about international politics, about the environment. Every time the Americans come into Sydney harbor with their nuclear ships and submarines, there's always 5,000 people telling them to fuck off.

But the hell with domestic politics?

Do you know anything about our system? It's built on a bickering sort of war. The front page is always about politicos throwing shit at each other, spending more time insulting each other than governing.

Mind you, they are really very good at it. It's a fine Australian tradition of political insult. Listening to parliament is hilarious - “Shut up, you bastard!” - and that's our prime minister, Bob Hawke. He's in the Guinness Book of World Records for having drunk a yard of beer in record time. He is actually a brilliant leader, a Rhodes scholar at Oxford, and he has done a bloody good job, considering the apathy he's up against. What he should be real pleased about its restoring pride in being Australian, particularly after all that nonsense when the governor general dismissed Prime Minister Whitlam in 1975.

How was that possible without the consent of the Australian parliament?

We're still a colony. I think a lot of us were cynical after that. They felt like puppets. Probably had something to do with the CIA. The good old CIA. I'm in their files, I found out. That they should waste their time on me. I'm listed as subversive, for my lyrics to “Guns in the Sky” and because I once threw condoms out to the audience in Northern Australia.

How is that subversive?

The more north you get in Australia, the more it is like the South in America. The man who ran Queensland, one of the biggest states in Australia, was this guy, Joh Peterson, who was in power for over 20 years. Peterson was this sort of South African leftover who arrived in Australia, and he made things illegal, like sex education, abortion, condoms to minors – you couldn't have the vending machines in clubs. [You can now.] Well, I slandered him, and so I got taken to court, where he was thrown out of office from the corruption uncovered during the proceedings.

Did that make you a hero down there?

Say what, mate? This is Australia, remember. Our heroes are bushrangers, outlaws, and sporting stars. If you're an athlete, you can get away with anything.

[Hutchence purchases the Basi shirts, and then we head to Tower Records at the corner. A street person approaches us.]

is this the official mugging committee?

Street person: “Ooh, ooh, here they come in their limo, straight from Saks Fifth Avenue. Board of directors, how you doing, moneys, you big-time decision makers. Uh-oh, who's you? You must be a rock man. Stand aside for the rock man.”

They always pick on me.

“I want to give you something, man. Some humility. But there's only enough for one.”

I don't care for some, but humility is something we can spread around.

“Hey man, this is for seriously. You will love this humility. No side effects, no speed. Say yes, and I can be back in an hour.”

[We go through the revolving door and right to the rock section; within three minutes, Max Q is playing on the system.]

That's good, somebody knows it's out.

[Hutchence buys albums by Ciccone Youth, Camper Van Beethoven, Soul II Soul, Grace Jones, Shakespear's Sister, Jesus and Mary Chain, and Suicidal Tendencies. As he is paying for them, he spots a postcard stand that features a picture of him.]

Holy shit. When did they take this thing? What a bizarre likeness. I hardly know this guy. This is not an approved photo. [He gets the attention of a young lady behind the counter.] Excuse me, please, this is not an approved photo. It's a pirate. Do you know where you get these from?

Salesgirl: “No idea.”

Can you find out?

“Why, do you want to buy a lot of them?”

See, I told you no one recognizes me.

[We walk outside and the street person comes up to him again.]

Street person: “I know who you are.”

Who am I?

“You are someone who's gonna give me a lot of money.”

How much you want?

“Just give me one of those bills, thank you. Now I'm officially your biggest fan. Just tell me what you want to buy.”

I must be dressed for success.

[intoanothermind]

Library - Dylan O’Brien

Word Count: 1.370

- Dylan O’Brien x reader

Synopsis: What happens when you meet a mysterious guy in the library you own?

Masterlist

----

Once again I had trouble getting the book I wanted from the shelf. I wasn't short - far from it - but my 5’8 didn't seem enough to reach the last shelf. As I was about to snort and give up reading, I saw an arm running past me and grabbing the desired book. I smiled, turning to D, as he'd asked to call him.

The way I met him was a little unusual.

I fled from Portland at the age of 16, in the biggest act of madness and courage after one of the worst beating I took from my drunk dad. I arrived in Los Angeles completely lost and was welcomed by Mrs. Jones, a kind widow who took me as the daughter she never had. A year later, she passed away, leaving her little bustling bookstore for me to take care of. Two months later, a hooded boy appeared who seemed to be on the run. He asked for shelter for a few hours and we talked all the time until he had to go. I thought I would never see him again, but since then he has kept up the routine of coming to the small bookstore and spending a few hours of his day with me.

Unfortunately, over the course of seven months, I fell in love with the boy I don't know the name of and didn't even see his face.

“Always popping up at the most unexpected times, aren’t we?!” I joked, and I almost felt euphoric to see the shadow of a smile on his lips.

“I need to help my favourite shorty.” He replied, putting the book in my hands.

“I'm not that short, you have to admit it.” I muttered, approaching him and squinting.

“It looks short enough for me.” He ruffled my curls, making me slightly irritated.

I glared at him, but something about him seemed familiar. The late afternoon glow didn't cooperate, but the few traces of his jaw poked my mind like silent curiosity.

“Sometimes I feel like I know you, D.” I muttered, more to myself than to him.

He looked uneasy, lowering his hood further to keep me from seeing his face.

“Anh... Are you going to read this book again?!” He asked, obviously nervous and trying to cover it up.

I shook my head out of the trance and watched the book The Death Cure he had put in my hands.

I shrugged. “I never get tired of this series.”

“Don't you prefer the movie?” He asked, and I could almost hear an amused tone in his voice.

“As much as I love books, don't ask me to choose between them and Dylan O'Brien. The reading will always lose in that case.” I said, walking over to the nearest table and sitting down.

D sat opposite me, frantically wiggling his fingers, and I realized he was extremely nervous.

“D, is everything alright?” I asked, holding his hands in an impulsive and automatic gesture. He seemed to relax at my touch, which made me smile.

“What do you really think about this actor, Y/N? What would be your reaction to meeting him?”

“How so?!”

“Is it just fan love or something?”

I blushed, releasing his hand so he wouldn't notice my fingers shaking.

“I thought it wasn't something else until I felt different with another boy.”

He looked angry, and I realized what I said. I held his wrist as he threatened to leave and prevented him from getting up.

“It's you, D.” I murmured, feeling his gaze on me. “Although I don't know who you are, you changed my life. Unfortunately, I still feel confused.”

I was startled when I felt his fingers caress my cheek, but I didn't back down.

“You won't have to be like this.” He said, and my heart skipped a beat at his caring tone.

“What do you mean?” I frowned, confused.

“I mean it's time for you to know who I am.”

My heartbeat quickened and I only realized that I had risen when I saw his face when I heard the thud of the chair slumped behind me.

“My God.” I muttered, putting my hand over my mouth.

Dylan O'Brien was standing in front of me.

“Calm down, Y/N, I can...” he began to say, but I just wanted to know one thing.

“Why?”

“When I came in that day, I realized you needed a friend and I didn't want my identity to get in the way.”

Although my fan side wanted to jump on him, I stepped back, as if I'd been stabbed.

“Don’t you trust me?!” I felt outraged.

“No, no, no. Is not it.” He came quickly to my side of the table, holding my face and wiping away the tears I didn't even realize were falling. “But I didn't know at first if you were a fan or not, and I wanted to be your friend.”

“And why tell me now?” I asked, trying not to freak out as I realized what was really going on.

“It seems that I fell in love with my fan, owner of this bookstore.”

Seeing his features and his beauty marks that I watched so much on television, videos and photos, I just had the reaction of jumping into his arms and holding him as tightly as I could.

“Was that a fan hug, friendly hug or...?” He asked, laughing.

“I think all three of them.” I said, feeling him hold me tighter against him.

His scent flooded my senses and his warmth warmed me. I could stay forever in that hug and wouldn't complain. I slowly separated from him, watching his hazel eyes that I had dreamed of seeing personally. I bit my lower lip on impulse, and winced as his eyes followed my movement. When I least expected it, I felt his lips crash against mine. I lost my senses when his tongue invaded my mouth and touched mine. I had so much time that I didn't go out with anyone I didn't even remember what it was like to kiss, so I let him guide me. His hands came down to my waist and as he squeezed me tighter, breaking any space between our bodies. I wrapped my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss further. I felt him shiver as I lightly scratched the back of his neck and ended up breaking the kiss by smiling over his lips.

“Forgive me.” He whispered against my lips. “I want to do it the right way. Do you want to go out with me, Y/N?” He asked, and I thanked him for holding me around the waist and keeping me on my feet.

I smiled at him, unable to believe it. “Of course I do.”

Dylan hugged me once more and I snuggled against his chest.

“I'm sorry I didn't tell you before.” He muttered, and I shivered as I felt his breath against the back of my neck.

“I wanted to be mad at you, but I just can't.”

He laughed, and I felt his body vibrate against mine. “Good then.”

I turned away from him, a little embarrassed.

“Can I... be a fan for a moment and ask for a picture with you?”

Dylan laughed audibly but nodded. I grinned as he hugged me from behind so I could snap the picture. He turned to face me soon after, keeping his hands on my hips.

“I'll pick you up here tonight at eight, sounds good?”

I nodded, smiling. Dylan stole one more kiss before he left.

And I couldn't stop thinking that the feeling of already knowing D was because I really did.

And I was already in love with him.

[be-dazzled]

88 and Gruvia if you're still doing the prompts pls

88. “Don’t panic but I think we might have accidentally gotten married…”Rating: M for sensitive language and content

Juvia woke up utterly confused. She didn’t understand her body. The headache was so severe she thought she got hit by Thor’s hammer. Maybe, she did get hit by Thor’s magical hammer. She had no memory of what happened the night before. If Juvia tried to remember, her head felt like an egg about to crack open. With the pain she was suffering, Juvia preferred that too and wished that her head would just split into two.

Oh, the throbbing was killing her.

Her mouth tasted weird too. It was as if she boiled some dirty socks unwashed for almost a month of use and sipped the dirty sock soup. Juvia forced her eyes to open. Apparently, she could still do that at least. A low groan forced itself out of her mouth when she tried – and failed – to prop her elbows and help herself up. Juvia expelled a frustrated breath and decided it would be better if she turned to her side instead. But that caused somewhere else to throb.

Weird.

The heavy drapes were drawn across what she remembered to be a floor-to-ceiling window overlooking the iconic Caesars Palace fountains. Good, she was still in her suite. Juvia hoped she didn’t do anything weird or funny last night.

Fragments of last night flashed before her eyes. She saw a picture of a strange woman dancing atop a pool table waving some replica of Thor’s hammer. Looking closely into the memory, Juvia realized the stranger looked exactly like her, except that the dancing woman’s clothes were kind of disheveled. The resemblance was uncanny. Maybe, because the wild woman dancing atop one of the pool tables was her – Juvia Lockser.

Hands flew to cover her mouth. It definitely was her! And suddenly she remembered taking her top off too, in front of so many people. Did she sign up as a stripper or something? Juvia prayed it was just her brain toying with her to teach her a lesson.

This isn’t you, Juvia Lockser.

She could hear a voice at the back of her mind reprimanding her.

You are not some kind of a lose woman.

And now she was talking to her own brain but she, the brain, was right. Juvia was a far cry from that shameless woman waving her lace bra like a flag. She got her shit together, stripper Juvia obviously did not. But between the two of them, stripper Juvia seemed happier – real Juvia wasn’t.

The taste of acid began in the pit of her stomach. The harsh reality was reminding her why she decided to fly off to Las Vegas and leave everything and everyone behind.

Bora. That son of a bitch.

But she wasn’t going to think about that jerk. She was in Las freaking Vegas and she seemed to have enjoyed herself last night. It was the only explanation why it felt like her body was thrown around the room. Another head-cracking throb hit her head. She decided to sleep it off. Thinking and remembering wouldn’t do her any good. If she didn’t force herself, Juvia knew she was going to remember the entirety of the night. She just wasn’t sure if she wanted to face that reality. So, Juvia lied back to bed, only to sit right back up when she felt some movement beside her.

The horror of the possibility rounded her blue eyes. She slowly turned to her side where she felt the continuous stirring. Juvia shuddered the moment it registered to her what – or who – made the stirring: a man. A warm flesh of a man was sleeping beside Juvia and he had his bare back on her.

Juvia became suddenly aware of that other part of her body where the throbbing was coming from. Somewhere down south. Juvia expelled a scandalized shriek.

“Hey, can you quiet down a little?”

The mystery man turned to her and Juvia didn’t care how good-looking he was. She didn’t care how chiseled his features were. That light stubble under his chin. That jaw that every male model would die for. That red swollen lips that was just begging to be worshiped. And that black bed hair. Oh god.

And she didn’t absolutely care that the white sheet fell down his lower abdomen, exposing some tanned skin and that good ol’ happy trail. She shook her head to get rid of the tempting thoughts. There was a more urgent issue on hand.

Like…

“Who the hell are you?!”

With her tone, it sounded more like a sentence rather than a question.

One corner of the stranger’s beautiful, beautiful mouth pulled up in a smug.

“Hey, don’t tell me you already forgot.” The stranger leaned closer, invading her space more than what she would allow a stranger. His dark blue eyes bored through her – teasing and taunting, filled with heat that was turning the pain in her core into something else. Something tingly. “You kept screaming it the whole night.” Then he continued, mimicking how she ‘screamed’ his name. “Ooh, Gray. Mm. That’s it Gray. Yes, Gray, there. Don’t stop, Gray. Oh G–”

Before this ‘Gray’ could get to that part which Juvia now vividly remembered, the mortified bluenette let out another ear-splitting scream. Not the kind of screaming the stranger was talking about. This wasn’t music to the ears.

“For such a small woman, you have a lot of that going on, don’t you?”

The glint in his eyes told Juvia that Gray was the kind of man whom no one ever said no to, who always got his way: proud and confident. Those kind of men scared Juvia. She slowly moved away, wanting to put safe distance between her and the stranger. Juvia was so occupied at wanting to get away from the raven-haired stranger that she didn’t notice that she was already backing away at the very edge of the bed.

“Hey!”

For a man with an ugly hangover, Gray’s reflexes were like that of an athlete. He pulled Juvia at the very last minute before the woman fell off the bed.

Juvia wasn’t sure if she should be thankful because apparently she was bare naked under those sheets and so was Gray. And she found her very naked breasts slapped against his hard chest. The heat that she was fighting exploded at the contact.

So, she did the most logical thing to do and pushed poor Gray stumbling off the bed.

“Aw!” he cried. A shock of black hair popped out of the edge of the mattress. “Woman! You are very violent.” Gray nursed the back of his head that earlier made contact on the carpeted floor. But the wince was quickly replaced by a lopsided smile. “I like it.”

“Get out!”

Juvia jumped off the bed, ignoring her body screaming pain, and backed away from the stranger as far as possible. She only stopped when the back of her thighs hit the bedside table. She tightened her hold on the white sheet wrapped around her body.

“Hey, you’re the one who invited me up here.”

Juvia grabbed the lamp and threatened Gray with it.

“Geez, you react like this now. Wait ‘til you remember every detail.” he said, raising one teasing brow.

There seemed to be a very dark and exhilarating story behind his grin. But that wasn’t the most exciting part of Gray because when he stood to his full height, Juvia’s eyes drifted down that part she shouldn’t be looking at, that part that made her heart tremble. Juvia immediately tore her scandalized eyes away from that part, but not without a second glance.

He was still hard.

She threw the pillow at him which he easily caught. Next was the lamp, which Gray luckily dodged. Then, everything that Juvia’s free hand could grab.

Gray stepped back, shouting at the crazy woman who was throwing things at him. He raised his hand to try to stop the woman and talk some sense into her. Until, a slim light hit the gold band around one of his fingers.

“Woman, wait!”

Juvia was trying to haul the bedside table, giving him some time to tell her off.

“Don’t panic… but I think we might have accidentally gotten married.”

Gray raised and showed his ring finger wrapped with the gold band. Suddenly, Juvia felt something cold on her finger. She checked her hand, praying to the gods of Las Vegas and that Elvis impersonator she saw in her memory that Gray was wrong.

He wasn’t.

The band on her ring finger was very and awfully identical with Gray’s.

“I. WILL. KILL. YOU.”

You know that thing that people say explains how a thin, scrawny person could carry a refrigerator double his size during a fire? Gray could only guess but those people were right. It was the only explanation as to why there was a shattered furniture next to him which came from the slender woman at the opposite end of the room.

Gray was realizing it only now but his new wife was a very violent person. He should tell his assistant to get him some life insurance.

…

Writer’s Corner: I’m stuck with #SIYC so I’ll try finishing requests here on tumblr. Man, the draft for this has been sitting on my desk for a very loooong time. But since we guys have some time in our hands for now, we’ll try to get things done. I hope I get around this writer’s block and continue with our favorite Bunhead and Hoopster.

AND I do smell some new modern AU fanfic coming on. 

[moonlightsolo]

bête noire

summary: The Resistance sent out spies to track First Order trade but they were ambushed. General Leia has decided it’s time to find a new base. It has almost been a month since you’ve given birth. Your relationship with Poe has grown even stronger than before. Your mind can’t stop overthinking about where Kylo is, you haven’t felt him in a while. It’s been too long.

pairing: kylo ren x female reader

warnings: nsfw!!! (ur welcome)

wc: 5.5k

note: this chapter is a lot to handle. ok go read it, bye.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

It seems like over the next couple of weeks the war escalates drastically.

Two Resistance spies took a ship to go on a mission aimed to secretly observe First Order trade.

A barely audible transmission from their ship was sent to the Resistance on Hoth. Poe brings you to the command center since you have intel on the First Order, maybe they think you could know more than them. 

As you both walk into the large meeting room, you notice that mostly everyone from the base is here.

Leia is sitting down in a chair, talking to someone important. The lady cuts Leia off to speak, “Now that we are all here. Some of you may know we received a transmission from the two searching for First Order trades. Prepare yourself as this is hard for some to hear.”

She steps forward and presses on a button. At first, it was static but then the recording was normal as a lady’s voice erupted on the speaker. They were simply updating Leia on how they are going about the operation but she was interrupted by First Order troopers suddenly invading their ship. Blaster shots and screams are heard as they try to fight back.

A groan was heard from the man who was also on the mission, obviously, he got injured. The woman screams at the troopers to stop shooting, letting them take her as a hostage for the sake of his wellbeing. The sound gets muffled as she screams for them to stop then a single blaster shot echoes. What just happened?

Her cries were heard as they dragged her away. They must’ve captured her. Then the other troopers' footsteps could be heard as they raided the ship then the sound cuts out. “They noticed the transmission being recorded, so they shut it off and it was sent to us.”

Leia assumes that the male who is on the mission was too injured then the woman gave up for them to be taken, hostage. Instead, the troopers killed the man and only took her.

Mostly everyone in the room is teary-eyed from hearing such a gruesome scene that happened to their friends.

“The First Order may track the sent transmission back to us. I don’t want to do this, but to be safe we need to find another planet to take refuge on.” Leia’s voice spoke softly to the group. “I don’t want anyone to freak out but we need to leave urgently. Calmly pack up your things into transport ships so we can leave in the middle of the night.” Leia nods then everyone scurries out of the room to pack.

Poe catches your eye, he knows you are panicking. Your babies are almost a month old, how are they going to survive in a ship wanted by the First Order?

He grabs your hand and begins to pull you through the stampede of people to catch Leia before she leaves. “General!” He calls out and she turns around. She seems off, almost weakened for some reason.

“Do you have any idea about where we are going?” Poe asks Leia’s eyes dart around and there are too many people around so she motions for you both to follow her.

She leads you both to the corner of the room, most of the people have flooded out by now but she wants to stay quiet. “We’re looking at Ajan Kloss. It’s a moon that orbits around Ajara. It’s a jungle moon so it’s going to have a much different climate from here. Hopefully, we can easily acclimate there.” She sighs but gives you a reassuring nod.

“The babies will be okay. We will have our cloaking devices on so we’ll be invisible to their trackers.” She holds on your hand tightly before pulling away.

You look at Poe who pulls you in for a quick peck on the cheek, “Go pack everything up. I’ll be there soon to help.” He then follows her to ask more questions.

Your relationship with Poe has grown so much stronger. Kaydel and Poe called things off, and that made you guys even closer. Only really good friends, but you can’t help but notice how he has come to lay in your bed more and talk. Just talking though, no funny business.

Last time you saw Kylo was when he laid in bed with you the night after you gave birth. You’re hoping he’s okay and that he’s just too focused on his work to think about anything else. A part of your brain thinks that he may have given up on you and his children but you try to ignore those negative thoughts.

You take a deep breath as you walk out of the command room and make it back to your quarters. Thankfully, your shoulder has healed mostly and you’ve gotten rid of the sling. You grab large duffel bags and fold your clothes and put your belongings into one and the droid worked on putting the babies stuff in two different backpacks.

Ani and Ellie are much more active now but still so tiny. It worries you to bring them into a jungle. You just need to keep telling yourself it’ll be okay.

It feels like your senses are wiped from you and you lose your breath. You turn to the side slowly, your eyes look over the dark figure. “You’re fleeing. The Resistance knows The First Order is close to finding you.” His voice is deep and stern, “Tell me where you are.” His hand goes out to try and use the Force on you.

You look over him, taking notice of his darker under eyes and messy hair. His armor is in perfect condition like somebody irons it every day for him.

“Kylo. I’m sorry but that’s not going to work on me.” You almost laugh, his hand slowly drops to his side as he realizes. He takes a gulp, his adam’s apple bobbing. You grow concerned for him, your eyebrows furrowing. “Are you okay?” You take a hesitant step towards him, reaching out for his hand.

He seems closed off, “You’re pulling away. I can feel our connection fading because of the light. You need to stop holding on to them!” He grows frustrated, his voice rising slightly. Your facial expression turns into a frown as you slowly move closer, your hand touches his bicep. “I’m not holding onto them. I’m safe right now. We’re safe.” You look back at the children.

“No. You’re not. Once you get into those shuttles, I can’t save you.” He shakes his head and pulls away from your touch.

You felt tears prick at your eyes, a lump growing in your throat. “Just tell me where you are!” His veins pop out on his forehead. You wince as you back up from him, not wanting to be close to his temper.

“No, Kylo. The First Order will kill them all. You know it. Your mother is here, you can’t kill her. I know you can’t.” You sniffle and swallow your emotions. “You’d regret killing your mother just like you do with your father.” Those words caused something to switch in his brain.

“No. Killing my father was the best thing I could have ever done. I grew stronger. I am the leader of the First Order. The largest military faction in the galaxy.” He begins to pace, “If you were here with me, our family could rule the galaxy and take over.” His voice softens as he looks at you, a gleam of evil shows in his eyes.

His words are causing a knife to dig deeper into your heart, “No.. Kylo... We don’t want the same things. I want peace for our children, to play in the grass and in the sun. Not to be stuck on a gigantic weaponized ship in space.” You snapped at him.

You turn around to sling the duffel bag over your shoulder, wiping your tears so he couldn’t see them.

“Kylo, I know you’re torn. You should come back to your family here. Become who you really are...” You hesitate before continuing, “Ben Solo.” You turn around and notice that he’s gone. You felt another pang in your chest, tears now running freely down your cheeks and snot too. You wipe it off with your long sleeve and continue packing.

Poe walks into the room as you sit on the bed, your head in your heads as your mind runs with thoughts. He instantly takes notice to your inflamed face, “Hey, are you okay?” He comes up next to you to sit down and wrap a comforting arm around your shoulders.

You nod, knowing it’s a lie but you lean into his touch. “It’s okay. You don’t need to say anything, I’m here for you.” He tucks your head under his chin as he holds you.

“I’m going to take our stuff to a ship later, I’ll come to see you when I’m done so we can get onto a shuttle together.” He says the plan confidently. The droid interrupts, “Don’t forget about me.” She beeps out. You and Poe laugh, “Of course not.” He says to her.

Poe takes the heavy bag off of your shoulders to move it to the floor. “Come with me.” He grabs your hand, “You got them?” You ask the droid who nods and opens its arms mockingly.

Poe takes your hand and brings you into his bedroom, nothing is off of the walls nor is anything put away. “I need your help packing.” He laughs and you just shake your head with a playful smile.

It takes about thirty minutes for Poe and you to pack up his whole room. Of course, you chit chat throughout the time about what certain knick-knacks meant and why he is holding onto clothes he can’t fit into anymore.

Now both of you are laying on his bed horizontally, legs dangling off the bed as you stare at the ceiling. “Poe. I have a question.” You state softly, still staring at the concrete ceiling.

“Go ahead.” He looks over at you, turning on his side so he could play with your hair. “Why was I left on Crait?” You turn your head to look at him.

His facial expressions freeze, like he’s in shock. “What? Is the answer that bad?” You ask with a nervous laugh.

He lets out a breath before he starts to talk, “You were dead. Well, at least we thought you were... You had no heartbeat, we couldn’t stop the bleeding and you weren’t breathing either. As much as we wanted to take you with us, we couldn’t. The First Order was already beginning to move forward to enter the base. We didn’t even know if we actually had an exit.” He mumbles softly, avoiding eye contact. “But then Rey saved us. She used the Force and the rest of us got into the Falcon. She asked about you and when we told her the news she was heartbroken. She felt like you were the sister she never had.”

You couldn’t help but get emotional, everyone mourned over you and thought about you as if you were actually dead. “Then we traveled around the galaxy and found Hoth.” He let out a sharp breath through his nose. “For months we thought you were dead. I moved on with Kaydel, I started to finally come to terms with your death. Then all of a sudden, Leia tells us that she felt you through the Force. She felt you. It gave me hope you were still alive. Then she told us you joined the First Order, and that you were working alongside Ren.” He scoffed annoyingly which made you roll your eyes and sit up.

You pulled on your long sleeves to cover your hands, bringing the fabric up to your eyes to wipe your tears. “Poe... I didn’t know you thought I died. Honestly, I thought you guys left me because you knew I was dying and wouldn’t make it. I felt like the Resistance gave up on me.” You sniffle as you try to swallow the lump in your throat. Your brain works as you recall the hazy memories from Crait, you remember being alive and waking up. The pain you felt was indescribable.

Poe sits up too, moving closer to your body to pull you into his side. “Look, you’re one of the strongest people I know. You’ve been through some tough shit. You literally beat death so many times.” He gives you a squeeze. You look up at him with a teary smile.

You notice how his eyes travel from your lips then up to your eyes. Is he going to kiss you? Oh no, he definitely is.

Poe begins to lean forward, his dark eyelashes rest on his olive skin. Your eyes stay open as everything moves in slow motion, you admire his facial features as he nears you. One kiss wouldn’t hurt.

You let your own eyes close as you accept his kiss, one of his hands rest in the dip of your waist as the other is on your knee. Your hand comes up to his jawline to cup it and pull him closer.

The stubble on his face scratches you in the most attractive way. Stop, this is bad, you shouldn’t be kissing him. His lips are so addicting though.

He begins to deepen the kiss, his tongue gently rolls against your bottom lip as he tilts his head. A little squeak escapes your throat as his tongue hits yours, he smirks against your lips.

His hand travels up your knee, his other hand is gripping your hip now as he moves forward so you fall back against the bed again. He hovers over you, pulling away from the kiss so he can take a deep breath. You do the same too.

He dives right back in, his tongue dances with yours as his hands grip your hips to move you farther up the bed. Both of your breathing has picked up as you pant into each other’s mouths. His warm hand makes its way under your shirt to grip your pillowy flesh on your side. He hesitatingly pushes his knee between your legs to open them so he could fit between them.

This is going way too far but it feels too good to stop now.

“I know this is so wrong.” He almost moans into your mouth, “But it feels so right.” He begins to kiss down your neck, leaving little marks that will be gone soon.

You let out a whimper, biting your bottom lip as you try your hardest not to rip your clothes off right now. You haven’t been touched in forever and right now you’re throbbing for some relief.

“Poe, I can’t.” You’re crying on the inside, asking yourself why you couldn’t let yourself have some pleasure. You can’t stop thinking about Kylo. Poe instantly pulls his lips off of you when he hears you say no, “Okay, yeah that’s fine. I’ll do whatever you want.” He is breathing heavy above you.

He gently rolls to the side, his back against his bed now. “Sorry, I didn’t expect it to get that intense.” You mumble shyly, “Don’t be sorry. It’s your choice.” He says quietly. “I’m gonna go now. Thanks for... that.” You say awkwardly as you get off the bed. You look back at him once and smile, he returns it, of course.

You need to go take a cold shower to calm your libido, which is what you do as soon as you get into your room. You notice that the droid has taken Ani and Ellie for a walk around the base.

The cold water trickles down your hot skin as you wash away your thoughts. Everything moves in slow motion as your ears start to ring then your surroundings go silent. It’s Ren. You turn the stream of water off, grabbing your towel to wrap around your body then you open the shower curtain. He’s standing there in front of the door.

“The pilot. He kissed you.” Kylo says under his breath. Your ears barely pick it up since his voice is so deep. You stop in your tracks when you realize what he said. Water continues to drip from your hair and roll down your damp skin.

“How do you know?” You ask, your eyebrows furrow in confusion.

“I felt it. I had a vision and I felt you.” His voice is low.

“The kiss meant nothing.” You practically lie through your teeth, knowing it was much more. The kiss was passionate, like a bomb of built-up tension blew up and everything was let loose but it will never be as good as Kylo.

The raven-haired man shakes his head, looking to the side with his head angled down. He almost seems sad.

“No, I am not sad.” He scoffs at your thoughts, “I cannot blame you for your actions. I haven’t made an effort to connect with you.” His head lifts up and he stands up tall with his shoulders back. Before you could respond he changes the subject, “You called me Ben. That’s why I left. You know that’s not my name. The Resistance is changing you. I’m trying to keep you from going to the light but you’re pulling away from me.” He’s stern.

“I’m not pulling away.” You take a step out of the shower, his eyes follow you as you move closer to him. “I know you. I can feel your emotions. You want to be with me and our children but the path you’ve chosen makes the situation much harder for you to just stroll back to your family. People will be scared, they won’t trust you.” You breathe out, your hand coming up hesitatingly to rest your hand on his chest, feeling the ridges of the black fabric underneath your fingertips.

“I love you. I want to be with you but I’m going to have to choose this path for our children. For their well-being.” You look into his eyes and notice how he grows frustrated with your last sentence.

“For their well-being? You’re packing them onto ships targeted by the First Order. They could be blown up easily. If you would join me, you’d be protected! The Resistance does not have enough ships nor the people to try and go against us again.” He proves a point, “The Resistance left you to die. What makes you think they wouldn’t do it again?”

Goosebumps ran across your skin when those words left his mouth, “They thought I was dead. They didn’t leave me to die.” You took a deep breath then you back up from him, “Let me by.” You look up at him and he doesn’t budge as he keeps eye contact with you, “Please.” Your face scrunches up in annoyance. His large frame moves to the side, his hand coming up to mockingly lead the way for you.

You scoff and open the bathroom door to walk out into the cold bedroom with Kylo in tow. You don’t hesitate as you drop your towel in front of him to get dressed, you can feel his eyes on your body. You’re comfortable with him but your body has changed since you’ve given birth.

You were on a strict training plan when you were with the First Order, but with the Resistance you were definitely a bit more lenient with your food intake and the lack of physical activity.

You’ve gained a bit of weight around your hips and thighs, you have new dainty stripes painted across your stomach and hips from being pregnant too. You took a deep breath as you shimmied into your clothing, some joggers and a long sleeve top to keep you warm. You take your towel to wrap your hair up to dry it faster, “You’re different.” Kylo states softly, as his eyes look over your body once more.

You look at him with annoyance written across your features evidently, “What does that even mean?” You laugh as you move around the room to make sure everything is packed away. “You’re leaving soon aren’t you.” He takes a step forward when he notices that you’re occupied with other things. He can’t see your surroundings but he has an inkling to what you’re doing.

You ignore his question, “What do you mean when you said I’m different?” You put the rest of the supplies into the packs before you turn towards him.

“You’ve changed. I’ve said this to you before. It’s good and bad. You’re... beautiful. Although the light in you...” He takes a few steps closer to you, now arms length away. “It pains me to see you turn away from the dark. You have so much power inside of you. I attempted to help you let this power out... Rey is only trying to tame it.” His gloved hand comes up to brush your cheek with his fingers, his thumb rubbing your cheekbone. “I love you.” He breathes out, closing his eyes as he rests his forehead against yours.

You feel tears in your eyes as you close them, “I love you.” Your arms wrap around his waist to pull your bodies closer.

A knock on the door makes both your heads turn, “It’s the pilot.” Kylo hisses out. You can tell he wants to move and become face to face with him but you hold onto him tightly.

“Yeah?” You call out, “I-I just wanted to see if you were okay... After ya know, everything that happened.” Poe’s voice is muffled from behind the door. “Yeah, I’m good. Just got outta the shower. I’ll be out soon.” You try to get him to leave, “Okay. I’m gonna meet Finn and Rey to get some food. I hope to see ya there.” He begins to walk away, you hear the front door open and close.

As you move your head to look up at Kylo, he grabs your face to press his lips against yours roughly. The towel on your head begins to loosen as he backs you up into the wall, the towel falls to your feet and your damp hair falls to your shoulders. “I want you.” He growls into the kiss, it makes you whimper. The way his other hand grips your hip at the waistband of your pants and his other hand on your jaw makes you melt.

“Nobody can please you as I do. You’re connected to me.” He breathes against your lips then he trails kisses down your neck to your collarbone. His hand slips underneath the waistband of your pants, the warm leather tickles your skin as he moves closer to your core.

That’s when you realize there’s still pressure against your hip like he’s holding it. He doesn’t have an extra arm, does he?

He smirks against your skin when he hears your thoughts, “This is gonna feel so good.” He begins to back up from your body, but something is holding you against the wall and there’s still something in your pants. The Force.

You let out a whimper as the invisible hand tickles over your core, you watch how two of his fingers come up and make a come hither motion. Your head slams against the wall as the Force buzzes inside of you, your thighs squeeze shut in reaction. “Oh.. my...” Your voice is shaky as your knees buckle, you brace yourself to fall but he holds you up.

The pleasure that’s buzzing inside of you is euphoric, almost too much for your body to handle. Something vibrates against your clit which makes you cry out and squirm under his restraints. You bite your bottom lip as you pant, you already feel like you’re going to climax.

“Let go. You’re tense, you need to relax.” The force pumps in and out of you, the pace quickening as he feels you. His eyes closed as he focuses, you see white spots as you let go. You gasp for air as your thighs quiver, your toes curling against the floor.

The restraints leave your body, making you fall forward but he catches you before you could hit the ground. “Good.” He praises you as he easily lifts your limp body up to bring you over to the bed.

“Thank you.” He says to you, giving your forehead a kiss. He stands up next to your bed looking down at you, “For what?” You ask out of breath. He just stares at you, “I found out where you are. I’m coming to get you and our children.” His presence leaves your side as he walks away, disappearing before your eyes. You let your guard down and you didn’t even realize he was reading your mind.

You sit straight up in the bed, moving as quickly as you could. You try your best to walk straight so you could slip on some shoes. You leave your quarters as you start to jog down the hallways then you end up in a full sprint, “Poe! Poe!” You scream as you see him walking down the hallway with Rey and Finn.

“He knows. They know where we are. You guys need to leave. Now.” You say out of breath, your hands going onto your knees as you bend over.

Poe’s eyes go wide as he registers what you just said, he doesn’t say anything he just runs away towards the command room with Finn.

Rey stares at you with fear in her eyes, “How? What happened?” She pulls you up to look you in the eyes, “I let my guard down. He went through my head. I didn’t know, I’m so sorry.” You breathe out. Her brown eyes are wide with fear as she turns around to go follow Poe and Finn.

Then you realize the droid is still with your babies, you need to find them. You push past her as you start to run down the halls frantically, Rey calls your name but you just ignore her.

A siren in the base sounds, red lights lighting up in the hallways. Everyone begins to panic as they’re all moving towards the hangar to get onto the ships. You spot the droid with the babies cradled in her arms, you run up to her and take Ellie. “We need to go. Get the bags.” You and the droid begin to run towards your quarters, laying Ellie on the bed as you exchanged your slippers for boots.

You put the duffel bag over your shoulder while the droid grabs the bags for the babies and puts them on her mechanical arms. You scoop Ellie up and begin to join the stampede in the hallway, making your way to the hangar.

Your brain is working so quickly, you don’t know what to do. Adrenaline is pumping through your veins, your heartbeat is so fast.

As you near the transport ship, you see Poe, Leia and Rey are already inside. Kylo reaches out to you through your mind, “If you get onto that ship, I can’t save you.”

You stop in your tracks as the last bit of people board the ships, “Don’t get on the ship. I’ll order to not attack the Resistance.”

His voice sounds promising, tears are now running down your cheeks. You can’t take the chance of having your children die if you get on that ship. Poe walks out to you, “What’s wrong? What are you doing?” He asks, obviously concerned.

“I can’t go.” You shake your head, “What? Why? Stop it, come on.” Poe asks as he tries to lead you to the ship but your feet are anchored into the ground.

“If I go, we will all die. You need to go without us.” Your hand reaches for the blaster in Poe’s sling, grabbing ahold of it to point it at him. You click the safety off, your finger resting on the trigger. His hands go up in surrender, “I’m sorry. You need to go.” You look at the droid who’s standing still with Ani then back at Poe.

You look back at the ship, noticing Rey isn’t by Leia’s side anymore. “Shit.” You curse as she comes up behind you to disable your actions with her staff. The blaster falls from your hands and so does Ellie, Poes quick reflexes make him fall to his knees to catch her before she could hit the ground.

She instantly begins to cry and so does Ani. They’re frightened. Poe rushes onto the ship with the droid in tow. Your face is pressed against the cold concrete of the hangar, wrists behinds your back with her knee against them. “Rey, please. They’ll kill us all if I go with you.” She pulls you up by your wrists, pushing you forward so you stumble onto the ship. She leads you over to the corner of the ship, sitting you down by pushing on your shoulders.

“She is a traitor!” Rey yells at Leia, pointing at you. The droid situates the babies as the ramp closes to the ship, the hangar opens as the ships begin to fly out one by one. They all have the cloaking device on, hoping to stay under the First Orders radar. Not like it didn’t work the first time on the way to Crait.

Rey and Leia bicker back and forth about you and you listen to their words. Leia is trying to justify your actions but Rey says you’re too far gone to be saved. It might be true. Even though Kylo says you’ve turned to the light too much.

Poe walks up to you, looking at you from above. “He’s in your head. He’s corrupting you. Don’t let him do this to you.” Poe bends down to get to your eye level, “I knew that you wouldn’t hurt me.” He breathes out as he brushes back a piece of your almost dry hair.

“We’re all going to be okay.” He says as the ship leaves the hangar, the white snowy landscape shows itself. You hear the thumps of the other ships entering light speed, then the ship you’re on jolts and you’re surrounded by the swirling blue of hyperspace.

You lean back against the cold metal interior of the ship, your eyes glance over to see your babies being taken care of. You’re so thankful for that droid.

“We’ll be off this ship soon and then we will be safe and sound. I promise.” Poe sits down next to you so you could lean your head on his shoulder. “I believe you.” You mumble as you close your eyes and take a deep breath.

-

The shuttles land in the hangar, troops instantly begin to pile out of them to search the premises.

He stands up swiftly from his seat to leave the ship along with the General who is not far behind.

“Supreme Leader. We’re too late, they’ve escaped.” The smaller man sighs.

Kylo Ren’s dark gaze scans over the hangar. He notices that one of the troopers picks up something from the ground. Another armored man walks up to him as they discuss what it is.

Ren takes huge strides towards them, towering over the two as he snatches the cloth from their hands. It’s a baby hat.

He rubs the cloth between his thumb and pointer finger, the leather of his gloves move against it smoothly. The troopers look up at Kylo, “Continue searching.” Kylo orders them and they scurry away.

General Hux walks up next to Ren, instantly noticing the hat in his hand. “A baby... Who would conceive children during a war?” He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he begins to follow his troops towards the entrance of the base. Kylo lifts his head, blinking back tears as he stuffs the hat in the pocket inside of his cloak.

He takes a deep shaky breath, his jaw clenches as he gulps. His tough facade returns, leaving him as the Supreme Leader of the First Order once again.

The troops continue to move around him to explore the base to see if there are any clues to where they have gone.

Kylo begins to walk forward, moving from the hangar and into the hallways. The base now seems like a First Order has captured this base as their own. There is so troops marching around.

The memory he saw in your head replays as he follows the same hallways you walked to make it to where you were living.

His hand grabs the doorknob to the front door to open it, walking inside the home you lived in for months. His eyes glanced over the area, you definitely left in a hurry. He walked forward, pushing open the ajar door to the room you stayed in.

He notices the two cribs in the corner that you didn’t take. He looks over the unmade bed, his hand runs over where you laid. He walks over the cribs, seeing how they’re stripped to nothing. Only the mattress is left. His hands lay over the mattresses, his head hangs as his emotions get the best of him.

He has to get his family back. He needs to protect them, no matter what the cost.

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