#it's all worth it for you dragon age

[inquisimer]

I have been on the retail therapy train this week and it's all worth it

[vaguely-concerned]

the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

[thedeadthree]

-ˋˏ .·:·. ⊱ 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐕𝐄𝐈𝐋𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃 𝐛𝐲 @pavus — day one: 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞.

— 𝐈𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐑 . 𝐕𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈 𝐃𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐀 . 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐀 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐍𝐄.

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐃𝐀𝐒. 𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐎𝐘 𝐈𝐓 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐒.

— 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 (mutuals can opt in/out via 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 <3):

@loriane-elmuerto, @carrionsflower, @auricfog, @girliefailure, @sunsofdawn

@risingsh0t, @griffin-wood, @lilywatt, @full---ofstarlight, @grapecaseschoices

@tommyarashikage, @shadowsofrose, @shadowglens, @weisshaupts, @queennymeria

@deadrlngers, @d-esmond, @courtana, @gothimp, @wlwaerith

@unholymilf, @aezyrraeshh, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @shellibisshe, @florbelles

@celticwoman, @neonshrike, @cloudofbutterflies92, @adelaidedrubman, @carlosoliveiraa

@pinkfey, @spookyrares, @yharnams, @aceghosts, @confidentandgood

@theelderhazelnut, @leviiackrman, @ellierenae, @anoras, @lavampira

@dialdrunk, @full---ofstarlight, @imogenkol

[kinlochbabe]

you know what i have soooo many problems with how datv handled the crows but they did give me house dellamorte and all the twisted poison-dripping-down-the-tree family relationships that came with it and for that i am thankful.

[mabaris]

no youre completely right - im a gay (trans)man and i legit wanna see so much more about the women bc There Is So Little. I wanna make a lesbian oc who gets bent in half by taash. im very normal.

i’m just tired man!!!! it feels so obvious how disproportionate it is when you’ve got. a cast of characters that we know almost equally little about. and a few of them explode in popularity and it’s like spongebob sticking his hand out the curtain. literally all a character needs to do numbers is to be a light-skinned man

[shift-shaping]

Is Solas getting paid by the Inquisition for his work

[vultures-and-scavengers]

cullen's thousand yard stare at getting interrupted is so funny. like at this point i assume he's trying not to think the maker has it out for him specifically, considering all the Unprecedented Historical Events he keeps witnessing up close. so like. of course there's something good in his grasp and then. interruption.

[superhousecat-once-again]

Unfortunately now that I’ve finally seen it, I 100% cannot stand the Solavellan ending and like I knowww that’s in large part because I’ve been functioning on a different level with the ship the entire time but it’s just sooo forgiving of Solas and sooo tragic for Lavellan and does not include the most fascinating element of their dynamic to me which is ‘Solas starts to see the value of the current world because of how much Lavellan loves it and is so deeply part of it’ and in fact fully discards it because Lavellan just fucks off to fade prison for “true love”

[galsinspace]

Ok so here's my long ramble post about how I understand Dragon Age lore right now before the new game comes out and throws wrenches (or wenches) into this

Fen'Harel's creation of the Veil and imprisonment of the pseudo-gods trapped them in two seperate prisons: the Evanuris in one and the "forgotten ones" in the other. They were warring factions of powerful leaders, the Evanuris the current rulers and the Forgotten Ones wanting to overthrow them to grab power for themselves. According to Dalish lore, Fen'Harel walked among both these factions - likely because Solas wasn't interested in their power struggle.

The Forgotten Ones then became the Old Gods of Tevinter. According to codex entries you find in the Fade, the Old Gods used to talk to people and shaped the Empire. I assume they could talk to people in dreams through the Fade and thus had an especially strong connection with mages, the ruling class of Tevinter. And they used this influence to build this empire with the goal of pushing magical innovation and power until the magisters could perform a jail break.

And that unleashed the Blight! The magisters broke into the Black City, an ancient elven palace city that had been pulled onto the Fade side of the Veil because it was so magical that it couldn't exist seperate from it (even more magical than the Library that was pulled into the Fade only partially), and unleashed power that was far more than they could handle. They freed the Forgotten Ones but also Tainted them, turning them into the Archdemons. The Old Gods of Tevinter disappeared, stopped speaking to the people of Tevinter, because they'd been turned into something lesser than they used to be.

I've already made a post speculating that Ghilan'nain created the Blight as an experiment in full immortality and total control of mindless slaves. Maybe that's why the archdemons seem pretty mindless themselves now, because they're not Ghilan'nain and can't wield this magic she created exactly as she would. They're leaders among the darkspawn but they're still darkspawn themselves.

Which brings me to my next point.

It's also interesting that Corypheus is so physically melted together with red lyrium. That must have happened to him in the Black City! There must have been lyrium there!

[Edit: well fuck I guess he wasn't full of red lyrium yet in DA2]

It seems pretty clear in both Trespasser and that one inscription in the temple of Mythal that Mythal had a large scale lyrium mining operation and was waging war against the titans and dwarves about this (I've made another post about this that includes codex entries). So Mythal was also in the business of magical innovation, expanding the boundaries of magical power, why else would she need all that magical fuel! And then @lipsie introduced me to the theory that Mythal created the qunari because she's associated with dragons, and that makes SO MUCH SENSE with this one casual line in Trespasser that says that qunari mages are especially powerful, more powerful than other mages! Mythal created the qunari by splicing elf and dragon DNA to create even more powerful magic! And for all this she needed lyrium!! AND she has the horns!!!

The qunari are gonna be so mad when they find out...

It's also interesting that the qunari still live in a society so fundamentally built on obedience and conformity to assigned roles and values. I'm not saying that's genetic, that would be bullshit writing, but that this is a culture Mythal created to keep her new slaves under control. If their capacity for magic could be greater than her own, then she'd need to keep them on a very short leash so they'd never rebel against her.

Man I wish we'd gotten a saarebas companion...

But I think this will be another aspect of the theme of the plans of the elven slavemasters being overthrown when the people they want to control reject and fight them. I think this will happen with the Wardens (who carry Ghilan'nain's magical control virus), with the elves in general, AND eventually with the qunari. And the qunari will have to reckon with their very existence being the work of someone they hate, and the very values they hold being something designed to keep them oppressed. Which they already were anyway lmao but maybe this will be eye-opening for them. And some of them will probably follow Mythal and be villains!

Kind of crazy that I never realised this before when Mythal just HAS THE HORNS. Maybe she also gave herself some dragon powers.

So... Mythal.

First we hear that Fen'Harel killed her. Then that the others killed her. Then Solas says that was their greatest crime because Mythal was the best. Then he kills her.

Mythal was one of the most powerful leaders of a world we know now as a corrupt slave empire no more innocent than Tevinter, that's literally how Solas describes it. Mythal is known as a wise and just ruler in Dalish mythology, and this is because she was considered such in Arlathan: there's an old text you find in the Library that describes her wisdom in judging a conflict between two of the evanuris, and her solution is that two of their servants duel it out. That paints a pretty clear picture to me! It was a society where the powerful were the only ones deemed important, their squabbles were fought out by expendables. And this was seen as wise! No drop of important blood spilled! Just those chess figures whose value lies only in the purposes of their masters.

We see that Solas wasn't like this. Here are two things Cole says that I believe are about him:

Solas was a spirit of wisdom bound to Mythal's service. She wanted him to become an elf, so he did. He wore her vallaslin. But no longer a spirit but a "real" person, he was more than just a singular purpose - he came to want freedom and he took it. He burned her vallaslin off his face (leaving the scar on his forehead because he wasn't as skilled at it yet as when he does it for Lavellan so gently). He stayed friends with Mythal but he was free.

This is fascinating in regards to Cole's personal quest, Solas doesn't want to bind him and he doesn't want him to become a person because that's what he went through. (Varric stands for the other side because he's the perfect representation of the mundane, physical world. He's just some guy, he doesn't believe in much, he's a pulp novelist, he has a years-long situationship, AND he's a dwarf - antithetical to Fade-type magic.)

And it's also fascinating as a parallel to... Morrigan.

She was raised by Flemeth. They had this complicated relationship where they cared about each other in some ways but Morrigan was also kept fully subservient, and Flemeth was abusive. And Flemeth raised Morrigan not to be her own person but to literally become a part of her. Just a tool to take possession of. And then Morrigan kills her.

I think this is the true Mythal: an abusive mother who treats other people - her daughters, her servants, her slaves - as extensions of herself. I don't think Flemeth "corrupted" Mythal or anything like that, I think they became one because they're the same.

And Solas has this complicated relationship with her because she was his friend, she let him go free (just like Flemeth let Morrigan go in Inquisition...) but she was still a ruler of this massive unjust empire that had to go. The after credits scene where he comes to her crying feels so real, it feels like this has happened before, it feels like he's come crying to his mother.

And then he kills her. Just like Morrigan.

Because he was fundamentally against her empire, he wanted "to give wisdom, not orders". His temple Solasan carries memories of people meditating:

It's represented to us in the typical game mechanic of just slaying some enemies to gain a bonus but I'd say that's just a limitation of the genre, it's supposed to be a place of meditation and gaining deeper understanding of the elements and magical skill. The avvar came there to learn the secrets of the elements:

It was a place of learning, that was what Solas did with his power before he decided on a full slave rebellion and finally world-changing magical event. Wisdom not orders.

One of the main recurring themes in Dragon age is otherwise peaceful people being pushed to extreme action because circumstances are just that untenable. Another is having to become a leader because the cause simply needs to be pushed. Both of those are present in Solas.

The inscription on the outside of the temple is also interesting:

Solas became our end. Come not to his temple.

I think this was written by an aging elf who survived the fall of Arlathan. The world fell because of Solas, he's aging and dying because of Solas, he came to his old temple to use his last strength to curse his name.

And because this has become kind of a Solas post, I'll leave you with one last Solas snippet:

[pinkyjulien]

Tagged by @arcandoria MMWAH Thank you bb 👁👄👁

Rules: Make a poll with five of your all-time favorite characters and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone's favorite!

▶ Tagging, no pressure in doing it 🤏 @lokiina - @elvenbeard - @wraithsoutlaws - @cybersteal - @teddys-shion

[flashhwing]

thinking about how fucked up a Cousland who wanted to join the wardens would feel about. y’know. the whole thing. Like “all I want is the heroism and glory of being a grey warden! but I have to stay here and fulfill my duty to my family. oh, ah, my family’s dead now …. guess I’ll go ….. be a warden. yay?”

[vaguely-concerned]

lucanis truly has a near terminal case of burned out golden child syndrome. caterina fucked both of these kids over so incredibly bad with the dynamic she enforced there, with illario being labled the perpetual fuckup kid where lucanis 'could do no (would never be allowed to do) wrong'. the way he admits in the first coffee date scene that the only thing that happened when he showed he could carry the weight of expectation was that more weight was added makes me so sad. you can hear it in caterina's voice in his intro mission that she's incredibly proud of him, but this is clearly a leandra and hawke situation where that pride never translates into relief or resolution or unconditional warmth or understanding or anything that really helps.

[0ccuria]

I love Champions of the Just so much. The personal aspect of it all and hearing your own corrupted voice speak to you just hits a certain way.

"What can you gain from being me?"

"Everything."

[aur-eliaa]

Okay I forgive BioWare for making me sob because the cutscene with Lucanis was so fucking good.

[requiemforthestars]

DAGNA MENTION

[iamtheothersideofthemoon]

Gaming Rant

-another reason video games are a benefit to the world; go deeper than just the surface and see what you find…-

My rant on my current escape to the world of video games ❤️

As most of the world is playing the new Dragon Age, I am reliving - again - my favorite of all time, Dragon Age Origins ^.^

I thought I’d take a short break to babble, for any other gamers who may relate or… just to give me a topic to write on, as I have promised myself I’ll be writing at least one piece daily, here I go!

A lot of people seem to think gaming is a waste of time; I personally use it as an escape from the pain of reality and of the work I do.

But that shall be a piece I write another time.

I am currently on the pause screen, about to go back and fight my way through the circle of magi… I don’t have any idea how many people here are gamers or if anyone is reading this, but, if you know the part of the story I am in, you know that upcoming is, for me and apparently many others, the lovely “maze/puzzle” as a demon gets into you and your party members minds, separating you.

The goal: get out of your head by successfully defeating the enemies that come your way. At some point in each you gain a skill, for example, one skill is to become a mouse thus making you small enough to move around via the dreaded mouse holes and get to places otherwise off limits.

Another is the ability to become a person of flame, for lack of better name, thereby allowing you to walk through the fire as fire, death no longer an option so long as you don’t change forms mid way through, but…that probably goes without saying. 🫢

There are two more, but you get the idea. Probably the only positive I find in this crazy maze / puzzle from hell are the perma buffs you find randomly about as you explore trying to find your way traversing through the only part of my favorite game that I would describe bet as hellish.

I suppose I can call this part positive now, for me at least - and if you are still reading I thank you- for this part is about to be upon me and I drreaaaad it 😒 I am not sure why entirely. and though I never have cheated my way thru but I came close at one point a few years ago.

I had beaten the game numerous times over the years, not once cheating, though, that night I decided to look it up. Perhaps it’d be okay to find a way to cheat past (let me proudly and painfully say I did not, and won’t be this time either, cheat! I take pride in that. But, I have been tempted in the past.)

It felt like a waste of time, reliving the misery of this part of the game; and much to my delight (and somehow, surprise,) I found not only am I not alone in my hatred for this place, there is even someone who hated it so much they made a mod so which allows you to skip the “puzzle/maze” and obtain the buffs without any of the effort. Apparently, the game acts as though you never skipped a beat.

I’m not big on mods though and I am a sucker for punishment so I dropped the idea, and did the dreadful maze. There is no feeling of success or gratitude by skipping over, no matter how many times it’s been beaten the hard way.

That applies to all aspects of life, I suppose. Anything worth any good rarely comes easy, rarely comes without setbacks or frustrations, rarely comes without dread or effort. in life I have found nothing yet I can say I am proud to have done or gone after that ended in with a sense accomplishment that didn’t require the above. It does create balance in life, I suppose.

It also builds character, speaking for video games and especially for life… if we do not walk towards a struggle and face it head on we definitely do not have the upper hand. And there is something to be learned from every situation, no matter how many times faced.

If we chose to always go the easy route we may as well just bury our heads or look away, missing out on the opportunity to help others, to learn something or to help educate. To grow be it as a character in a game, or more importantly as a human and as a spiritual being.

Ascension cannot come from running from our problems, nor can growth. Life and pain come together whether we want it or not. Looking at it from this perspective, perhaps I can start seeing even the hardest things as positive in the light that no matter how bad it is, at least I am growing.

I’d rather fail than look back at life, whatever the task I am facing, and say “I tried” than not be able to say anything other than I was too scared or whatever other excuses I could come up with, and I’m sure I have plenty.

I refuse to let fear or discomfort stop me from experiencing and living the life I want; be it in another world or in the “real” world.

If you managed to make it this far, I applaud you. Thank you…