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buckyismybicycle · 2 years ago

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Title: “I wanna be your slave, I wanna be your master” [AO3 Link] Originally written as part of: Bucky Barnes As… a Rockstar SERIES MASTERLIST Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Rating: Mature Summary/Notes: This is, pretty much, exactly what it looks like. Rockstar Bucky, Flirting, etc. EDIT: Now! I’m happy to announce that this is now IT’S OWN SERIES that I have the honour of writing with @rookthorne! More rockstar!Bucky for everyone!

“𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐨𝐧 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐲𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐁𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐝” Series Masterlist | Part 2 »

The crowd is already worked up from the band on stage and Bucky is grinning maniacally behind the stage. Nat, his bassist, looks at him like he’s grown a second head.

“You good, Buck?”

“Fucking fantastic, Natalia. I’m fucking fantastic. You see ‘em? It’s packed out there.”

“Your shows have been sold out all week,” Sharon reminds him while fixing Scott’s guitar strap.

“Iunno, Shar, it’s just different. Somethin’ about this place.” His blood is pumping from the heavy bass, the Cap Quartet rocking out on stage. He’s played shows with them before - Sam, Steve, Joaquin and Riley are all cool dudes. They’d become friends pretty easily, so it was a no-brainer that they were the first band Bucky asked to co-headline his tour.

—

“Thank you, you beautiful bastards!” Riley’s voice booms, followed by a loud screeching of the crowd. “Hang onto your panties if you still got ‘em, because the final act is gonna knock you dead. Yeah, you know who I’m talking about, the band you’ve all been waiting for — let me hear you fuckers!”

Bucky closes his eyes and lets the thrum of the audience's cheer work its way all the way into his bones. Fuck, he almost has a boner.

“Where’s Clint?” He asks, eager to get on stage. Natasha jerks a finger behind her where Clint is downing a bag of Cheerios between sips of Mountain Dew. Bucky grins, because it means Clint will be amped. Bucky can’t help but strum his own guitar a few times, the calluses on his fingers a permanent fixture by now.

Natasha hauls both Scott and Clint over practically by the ear, her studded combat boots thumping with each step.

“Ready?” Bucky asks with a wicked smile.

“Ready,” the three return in their usual manner, with grins and lazy salutes. Then it’s blinding lights and deafening roars.

Bucky wastes no time in getting the crowd amped.

“C’mon, are we asleep out here?! Let’s gooooo bay-beeeeeeeee!” While Bucky is loud, the crowd is louder and they are on their feet from the first strum of his guitar, and Bucky feels high as a kite.

It’s not your first show at the Kathedral, but it’s certainly the loudest. You’d never heard of this particular band, but Misty’s best friends make up the Cap Quartet, so you had to support them, of course. And they were good, you actually liked when they popped up on your shuffle.

Originally, you thought you’d maybe dip after they were done - sitting for two opening acts and the Cap Quartet’s set already had your feet aching. But the moment the next band stepped out, and Misty starts jumping up and down beside you, you have no choice but to stay. The energy was infectious and you kind of missed just letting go. You may not be a rebellious teenager anymore, but the atmosphere of being at a rock concert makes you feel young and reckless again. Even the smell of spilled beer and sweat brings back a bit of nostalgia, back to when you were sixteen and had ‘X’s drawn on your hands just to get in the venue.

“C’mon, are we asleep out here?!” You hear the singer shout, and you can’t help but think how beautiful the whole band is.

There’s a redhead rocking heeled boots that look like they could kill a man, her bass guitar plastered with stickers. The drummer is wearing a sleeveless muscle tank that does wonders for his arms and the other guitarist has a dazzling smile when he looks out into the crowd.

But the lead singer - he’s rocking black leather pants that bunch above his combat boots like he’d haphazardly stuck his feet in, but they’re tight across his thighs. You can see every flex in his muscles as he jumps around on stage. His hair whips around his face as he throws his whole body into his performance. It’s a small miracle he even manages to hit any notes on his guitar. His black t-shirt stretches across his shoulders and chest, hugging his biceps, which makes your mouth water, but what really hits you is his voice.

The opening notes of his song are the epitome of zero to one hundred. Your throat almost hurts just from watching him, but he’s nothing but smiles, clearly lost in what he loves.

I know I'm out of sight But am I out of mind? And when I close my eyes I dream I'll see you in the afterlife

He gets a moment of reprieve when the next part comes up, before he ramps up again, the veins in his neck prominent, making you wanna lick them. A glint of metal flashes in his mouth when he sings — a tongue piercing, probably.

One at a time I know this bridge we built won't last But it'll hold for at least a while Even when the life leaves your bones Your soul will follow me wherever I go It's in the way I feel your fire even when I sleep at night I stay inside your glow

He hits the chorus again, just as hard as he did at the beginning and you swear the floor shakes as everyone jumps.

I know I'm out of sight But am I out of mind? And when I close my eyes I dream I'll see you in the afterlife

Then he faces the audience and hops on the speaker in front, leaning forward with his microphone, his other hand waving for the crowd to sing it back to him. You’re captivated by his crystal-like eyes as the lights bounce off them.

I know I'm out of sight But am I out of mind? And when I close my eyes I dream I'll see you in the afterlife

You even find yourself shouting along, the song is so catchy that you’re into it from the moment it started. As you shout the last line, he looks right at you and it’s like an electrifying bolt through your body as he holds the look for the next line before he bounds off to the sides of the stage that he’s been neglecting.

You’re in awe as his voice changes to something smooth and soft, the instruments that were near deafening slowing down with him. He sways in the middle of the stage, face turned up as though in prayer, the bassist even hitting a few notes on the keyboard to her side as she backs him up, vocally.

I dream I'll see you in the I dream I'll see you in the I dream I'll see you in the I dream I'll see you in the I lost a vital part of me (I dream I'll see you in the) Lost a vital part of me (I dream I'll see you in the) Lost a vital part of me (I dream I'll see you in the) Lost a vital part of me (I dream I'll see you in the)

And in perfect sync, the band picks up, hard again, all of them (except the drummer) jumping as well and the crowd goes wild. You narrowly miss getting kicked in the head by a crowdsurfer, who gets a fistbump from the singer over the side of the stage.

I know I'm out of sight But am I out of mind? And when I close my eyes I dream I'll see you in the afterlife Lost a vital part of me Lost a vital part of me Now there's nothing left I dream I'll see you in the afterlife

You’re in a trance when he ends the song, holding the note so long you’re sure his lungs should burst. Maybe it’s the heat, or the adrenaline, or just your heart pumping out of your chest as you bounce for the rest of the set, but you could swear that the lead singer kept catching your eye.

You feel like you’re flying, on cloud nine, so maybe it’s all in your head, but goddamn if you didn’t twitch with want every time you met his eyes. How this crowd still had energy was beyond you, you knew that you were dead on your feet, hair plastered to your neck with sweat but grinning wildly.

“Alright you hellions, this is the last one.” When the crowd starts chanting ‘encore, encore’ he just laughs into the mic, his voice a little raspy from his performance.

“If we could, we’d play all fuckin’ night, you know that! But some of us gotta get to Indiana by tomorrow night. So we gotta make this last one count. Let’s get sexy, folks.”

His husky voice makes it absolutely devastating as he starts off by smirking at you.

I wanna be your slave I wanna be your master I wanna make your heart beat Run like rollercoasters I wanna be a good boy I wanna be a gangster 'Cause you can be the beauty And I could be the monster

It’s as though each line sent a new wave of desire through you. You picture calling him a good boy, wonder if he’d flush just as beautifully as he did now under the heat of the lights.

I love you since this morning Not just for aesthetic I wanna touch your body So fucking electric

The crowd loses its collective mind as he starts to ruck up his shirt, as each line gets progressively more seductive, and his shirt rides further and further up. You can’t help but ogle his washboard abs glistening with sweat since he was right there.

I know you scared of me You said that I'm too eccentric I'm crying all my tears And that's fucking pathetic I wanna make you hungry Then I wanna feed ya I wanna paint your face Like you're my Mona Lisa

Fuck, if that wasn’t the hottest image you’d had all night. His shirt comes off over his head and he twirls it, throwing behind him.

I wanna be a champion I wanna be a loser I'll even be a clown Cause I just wanna amuse ya I wanna be your sex toy I wanna be your teacher I wanna be your sin I wanna be a preacher

You lick your lips just as he turns to you and if possible, his smile grows even bigger, feral, as he sings right at you. The lyrics made your head spin with want.

I wanna make you love me Then I wanna leave ya 'Cause baby I'm your David And you're my Goliath

He winks before strutting off, his muscles tight and taunting. The sway of his hips, intentional or not, entices you, and you’d give anything to bite down on them. The stupid pants are just taunting you at this point.

Ah-ha… Mhm, ah-ha\ Because I'm the devil Who's searching for redemption And I'm a lawyer Who's searching for redemption And I'm a killer Who's searching for redemption I'm a motherfucking monster Who's searching for redemption

He sinks to his knees on the stage as steam hisses in the back in billow pillars. The lights change, flashing reds and oranges, yellows and pinks. They dance magically across his skin.

And I'm a bad guy Who's searching for redemption And I'm a blonde girl Who's searching for redemption I'm a freak that Is searching for redemption I'm a motherfucking monster Who's searching for redemption I wanna be your slave I wanna be your master

You’re going to die - straight to heaven or hell, it doesn’t matter at this point, because he’s honest-to-god crawling across the stage on his arms and knees, his mic still in one hand.

I wanna make your heart beat Run like rollercoasters I wanna be a good boy I wanna be a gangster Cause you can be the beauty And I could be the monster I wanna make you quiet I wanna make you nervous I wanna set you free But I'm too fucking jealous I wanna pull your strings Like you're my telecaster And if you want to use me I could be your puppet 'Cause I'm the devil Who's searching for redemption I'm a motherfucking monster Who's searching for redemption

He ends at the edge of the stage, his torturous crawl making your throat go dry from more than just your screaming. Then, he flips on his back, lets his head hang over the side of the stage.

I wanna be your slave I wanna be your master

The last line is but a whisper, and then he finally lets the mic drop, his arms stretched like he’s going for a backwards dive and his chest is heaving. He’s a sweaty mess, body on display and licks his lips while staring a hole into your soul.

—

The venue slowly begins to empty, stragglers buying merch or finishing their drinks. You feel dizzy when Misty drags you outside, saying that her friends want to hang out for a bit before they leave for the next town. You stumble along because, yeah, alright, her friends are cool.

They’re by their tour bus, all of them outside with drinks in their hands and they wave you both over.

“Excellent show, boys,” you greet as everyone takes turns hugging both you and Misty.

“Yeah, you guys killed it!” Misty agrees enthusiastically.

“What’d you think of the other bands?” Sam asks. “Parasite Fears has never been on the road like this.”

“That was the first band, right? They were really good! And the set was fun,” you say honestly. Now that you’re outside and it’s getting late, the sweat on your body is cooling, causing you to shiver a bit. Riley hands you a cup and when you ask what it is, he just smiles. You drink it anyway, because why not. They spend a few minutes chatting before a warm arm wraps around your shoulders, and your breath catches at the sight of bright crystal-like eyes beside you. His other arm is thrown over Joaquin as he stands between you.

“Hi, I’m Bucky,” he smiles blindingly at you.

“Hi,” you say back, still a little stunned at how at ease he seemed to be, even as he retracts his arm. He’s changed into basketball shorts of all things, which makes you even chillier just looking at him. This close, you can see the intricate lines of his tattoos - metal plates from shoulder to fingers on his left arm, swirls of black script along his other.

“You look cold, sweetheart,” he observes. “Couldn’t you guys have taken this party into the tour bus?”

“They’re fixing the bus,” Steve says. “Told us to stay outta the way.”

“You sure you’re gonna be alright to head out?” Bucky asks, his brows furrowed in concern.

“Should be,” Steve shrugs. “Tones said we’d be fine, or else he’d find another way. We’ll know in about two hours or so.”

“Ehhh, tell Tones to relax for once. If anything, you can divvy yourselves up and the rest of us could shuttle you the rest o’ the way.”

“Thanks, Buck,” Steve claps him on the shoulder.

“Yeah, yeah, can’t have you ruining the tour, punk.”

Something about their easy camaraderie makes you smile. But you’re still cold, and Bucky still notices.

“If I had a jacket, I’d offer it to you,” he looks back at you. “Next best thing, I can offer our unbroken tour bus?” He jerks his head behind and you see the redheaded bassist leaning against the side smoking a cigarette, chatting with the drummer who appears to be double-fisting drinks.

You look at Misty who is being introduced around to the other bands by Sam and Riley and there’s no way she’s going to be anytime soon.

“Um. You don’t have to,” you say, because he’s a stranger. He cocks his head to study you. It looks like he’s about to say something, but he doesn’t push.

“Offer’s open, doll,” he shrugs. Some other members come up to him, Steve, and Joaquin and congratulate them on their set so you quietly slip away.

You don’t know anyone else here, and it’s kind of awkward to be by yourself so you start wandering around. When you round a bus, you nearly smack into the drummer from Bucky’s band and you yelp as you both jump back.

“Sorry!” you both say at the same time before the sandy-haired man smiles and waves before walking past you. You notice that he’d dropped something - though it was small and black making it hard to tell what it was.

“Hey!” you shout at him, but he doesn’t turn around, instead heading back to his bus. You pick up the item, a transmitter of some sort, and try to catch up to him. You can’t seem to find him and the bassist had also left her spot so you approach the bus. The door is completely open but you knock on the frame anyway.

“Hello?” There’s no sound inside so you think about leaving it where he can find it easily.

“Takin’ me up on my offer?” You startle at the sudden voice behind you.

“Actually, your dummer dropped this,” you explain, thankful to at least hand it back to someone. “I tried to get his attention but I don’t think he could hear me, and then I kinda lost him in the crowd.”

“Don’t be offended, he probably took his hearing aids out,” Bucky tells you easily. “Thanks for bringing this back though, Sharon woulda fuckin’ killed him.”

“Hearing aids?” You can’t help but blurt out. “Wow.”

Bucky beams proudly as he tells you about his friend, Clint, how gifted of a drummer he is and how even losing most of his hearing never stopped him.

“That’s amazing,” you say, a genuine smile for his story and how much he was beaming just talking about Clint. Just then a gust of wind blows, and your jean shorts and t-shirt aren’t cutting it.

“C’mon, before you freeze,” Bucky jerks his head toward the tour bus and fuck it. You hop aboard, Bucky following you. He places the transmitter on the kitchenette table, looking hilariously giant in the cramped space.

“You come here often?”

“Did you just use the oldest pick up line of all time?” You scrunch your nose at him, liking the sound of his laugh.

“Is it working?”

“Not at all.”

“Then I’m just asking out of genuine curiosity,” he bats his eyelashes. They’re so pretty, you think to yourself.

“I used to. Less often now, but when I hear someone good is playing, I show up.”

He arches an eyebrow at you.

“Cap Quartet, I mean. Obviously. They don’t scream as much as you do,” you add, and you find yourself relaxing with Bucky as he takes all your jokes and jabs in stride as he tickles you for the slight.

“You hurt my feelings, doll,” he says, all smiles and sharp teeth.

“How ever could I make it up to you?” You find yourself flirting with him.

“Maybe you could scream for me this time,” he suggests, leaning in closer with a tilt of his head, eyes searching yours for a sign.

“Yeah?” You ask a little breathlessly, forgetting how to breathe as you two inch into each other’s spaces now.

“Yeah,” his lips just grazing against your neck. “Didn’t you enjoy that last song I sang for you?”

“For me?” You ask incredulously, making Bucky grin at you.

“Ya heard me, doll. For you,” he repeats. “It seemed like you enjoyed it..”

Whatever thought you’d had about him flirting with you was more or less solidified now, and it was making your body rebel against you. You lick your lips subconsciously before you answer. “Maybe.”

“Especially that bit… about wanting to be your master.”

You involuntarily hold your breath, legs squeezing together. It’s impossible not to imagine Bucky over you, pinning you down as he commands you to do as he wants.

“Or… maybe it was that bit about wanting to be your slave?”

The breath you let out is shaky, matching your trembling hands that are balled into fists across your lap.

Bucky’s eyes darken, and you’re not really sure who made the first move, but you’re suddenly kissing furiously, hands tangled in each other’s hair and clothes.

“Christ, I’ve wanted this since I first fuckin’ saw you,” Bucky tells you, pulling you into his lap, where you can feel his dick hardening through his shorts. It’s embarrassing how fast you get on board, your pussy quivering at the thought of being touched for the first time in too long.

“Tell me what you need, pretty little thing,” he nibbles at your bottom lip. “God, I wanna take you apart, wanna do anythin’ you want.”

“Yes,” you breathe. “That. Want that, too. Want you to fuck me.”

His lips curl into a smile against yours as he lifts you easily to tumble into a bottom bunk. “Yes, master.”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes as...#my works #bucky barnes fanfic #rockstar bucky #feat hold absence and maneskin lol #music taste

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obitv · 2 years ago

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thanks for 200 followers! have this :3

during the timeskip, william and vyncent decide to go dancing.

read on ao3 here!

You really need to learn to think before you speak. Like, now. Yesterday, even! Any point that was before right fucking now!

Inviting Vyncent to hang out outside the base? Sure, normal. You've been staying in the rubble of the old base for a few weeks now and it's still... unsettling. And you live together, of course hanging out is normal! Trying to experience normal teenage things now that you two have some downtime? Yes, sure! Normal!

Asking Vyncent if he wants to go clubbing? NOT. NORMAL.

He asks you to explain yourself. Of course. Because you really had to put your foot in your mouth there.

"It's, uh- A nightclub? A bunch of people our age go there to... dance? And there's music and drinks? It's- You don't have to go, I was just throwing it out there, ha, mean I've never even gone-"

"Cool. Sounds fun! When do we go?"

Oh, you're so fucked.

You find a nightclub. Or- Less find, more remember - totally not because you'd fantasised about this for days or anything, but because after Harlem brought you to one you went find which club he had been in, and subsequently memorise any other places you could possibly go, if you ever wanted to. Just to avoid him.

The infinitely worse part is when you spend far too long fretting about outfits. You spare a brief thought to wish you could talk to your old friends right now, but you manage to scrounge up something.. nicer than your usual. Tight ripped jeans you pretend you didn't steal from Ashe, indie band tee from some show you went to when you were 14, a worn dark leather jacket. And- Eyeliner. A little. You also pretend you don't remember much from Ashe's rambles about makeup, but that advice stuck with you.

You do not tell Vyncent about the unofficial dress code, and yet he picks up on it anyway. Probably keyed in when you started scrabbling through the rubble to pull that jacket out of what remains of your closet.

"Will? Do I need to.. dress differently?"

You will your voice not to squeak miserably. You fail. "N-o..? You- I'm sure how you usually dress is ok, y'know, they don't REALLY have a dress code? You- you'll be fine. Probably. Uh- Definitely. Totally... fine."

"There's a DRESS CODE?"

Which is how you end up standing next to a shirtless Vyncent Sol with a pile of clothes in front of you. If you had told the you from 6 months ago about this, he probably would've passed out on the spot. You aren't doing much better yourself.

You're trying very hard not to ask why, exactly, Vyncent owns low rise jeans. You're trying in general not to acknowledge that at all, actually, which is thankfully made slightly easier as Vyncent put those on BEFORE coming to ask you what to wear, so you didn't have to give any input on them. It's not like they're excessively tight or anything, just- He's not wearing a shirt. And Vynce may not be packed with muscle like Dakota but he isn't as stick thin as you and- You have eyes, ok!

But you are using those eyes for a much more acceptable task - helping Vyncent pick a shirt. So that he stops being all... That. You've narrowed the pile down to just two options before your brain melts and you tell him that "both- both of those are fine!" while mentally patting yourself on the back for almost making a full sentence after that whole ordeal.

You head outside before you can make a bigger fool of yourself, climbing through the rubble of the entrance and letting the cool evening air refresh your brain while you still can. Winter is quickly settling into the city, and you definitely aren't wearing enough layers to be out right now. You hope the walk can warm you up.

Vyncent comes up next to you right when you start having to fight back shivers. Bastard never even notices the cold, something about being used to higher altitudes. That's... something you should ask more about, probably. Not tonight though. Tonight is not a night for potentially emotional conversations.

Aside from your wandering thoughts, the walk is nice. The chill clears a bit with exercise and good company, and your jitters. Vyncent seems excited, thankfully, even if he's definitely out of his comfort zone. But so are you! Which makes this... maybe count as a bonding experience. If all goes to shit you can share the misery, and if things go well... Well. You can always hope.

You end up in a part of town that's still bustling even this late in the evening. Music and conversations blend together into one, filling the air. There's even colourful lights strung up between the buildings, almost making up for the lack of stars. Vyncent is looking all around at them - and you realise for all you guys went out together before, none of your patrols or explorations had taken him to this part of the city before, at least not after dark. You give yourself a moment to admire him - the lights here probably wash you out, but the faint colours reflect off his eyes and almost make them sparkle.

Before he notices you, you grab his arm and gesture to one of the open doorways nearby. A neon sign reading FERDINAND'S flashes above it, and together you walk over.

The music hits you as soon as you get near the door, a pulsing wave of bass from the speakers, and you spare a moment to turn back to where Vyncent is trailing behind you, still faintly starstruck.

"Hey, Vynce. You- just let me know if you wanna leave, ok? If it sucks we can just go home and watch a movie."

His gaze snaps to you, and he takes a breath. Straightens his posture a bit, like he's preparing to go into a fight, which you try not be amused by. He shakes his arm out of your loose grip and smiles at you. "Yeah, yeah. I still wanna check it out though!"

So in you go.

Clubbing... isn't something you have much experience with. You'd planned to go out, before, but you left Deadwood too early to really go anywhere. And the time with Harlem scared you out of trying to go anywhere while he could be around, so really your experience is limited to, uh. Next to nothing? So sue you for not knowing what to expect.

It's loud, for one. Obviously, but it's not loud in a bad way, just in a way that lets you feel the beat all the way in your bones, in a way that leaves little room for thought other than the beat. It's much warmer in here, though still not as crowded as you'd feared. Come to think of it, you're not sure what day of the week it is? But it's clearly not peak. The bar is crowded, sure, but it's barely two people deep at worst, and there's even free seats.

You hesitate to leave Vyncent, but when you gesture at a booth and then at the bar he seems to get the idea. He heads to get a table, and you go to grab yourself the drink you're definitely going to need to keep your head around here. You don't plan on drinking much, if any more than just one, but a little liquid courage feels like it'd be nice right around now. You order your beer, look back at Vynce, and order a second in case he wants it. You probably should've asked before he left.

You get them quickly though, and weave your way across the floor to reach him. He's still staring at everything, and it almost makes you wonder how the fuck you two had gotten past the bouncer. He takes one of the bottles out of your hands, but scrunches his nose up after sniffing it and puts it down on the table closer to you. That answers that, then.

Overall, it's a nice club. More of a pub on this level than a nightclub, really, but you know there's a proper dance floor around somewhere. The music is good, too, nothing too overplayed, and a fair bit you've never even heard before.

"I thought you said there'd be dancing?"

It's almost hard to hear him over the music, but you have to admit it's true. You brace yourself, throwing back the last of your drink, and stand up.

"C'mon! It's, uh, over this way, I think?" Fucking Vyncent and his elf hearing doesn't have any trouble with hearing you over the noise, getting up and walking with you before you resorted to getting really close for him to hear you.

Whatever. The dance floor is downstairs from the main bar, and- Wow. There's definitely more people down here, but still blessedly not packed. You hadn't considered that- well- There'd be other people here.

Vyncent, though, perks up. He was a pretty good dancer back at the party you won't ever talk about, now that you think about it. It's definitely a similar vibe, just less possessed highschoolers and more drunk college students. He's much less reserved than you, immediately heading to join the dancers while you hang back and watch.

The music is different down here, but still not bad. There's multicoloured lights shining all over the main floor, catching on people's hair, clothes, eyes, and Vyncent is... fucking stunning. He's in a league of his own out there. Going from partner to partner and somehow, he's just as amazing as he is in combat. You had assumed most of his skill had come from the whole possession deal back at the party, but this is actually him choosing. No tangos on this floor, but that doesn't put a dampener on him at all.

There's a break in the music, eventually. Vyncent comes back to where you're lurking, panting but smiling. He's gorgeous. Someone's body glitter has rubbed off on him, somehow, and the cascade of lights makes him glow. You haven't seen him this- happy, since before everyone left.

It's a.. scary thought. You want him to be able to be this happy forever, and in this moment you'd do anything he asked if he kept smiling at you like that. So, of course, when he holds his hand out to you and asks you to dance, you say yes.

Seriously. Think before you say things, Wisp! But Vyncent's hand is warm in yours, and you're just buzzed enough to not feel like hundreds of eyes are pinned to your every move, and the music is shaking your bones with every beat. To be fair, you've wanted this for... far longer than you'd like to admit.

You faintly recognise whatever song is playing. It's fast, and is probably going to be burned into your brain forever, because you are dancing with Vyncent fucking Sol.

[this is where i'll be, so heavenly, so come and dance with me, michael]

He drops your hand once you're properly in the crowd, which is a shame, but he starts dancing and you try to mimic him and others around you. It's easier than you'd thought, to not worry about the other people around you. Whenever you'd pictured something like this, you'd underestimated how it'd feel to really be here, with Vyncent watching you and laughing, seemingly carefree.

You think he's never looked more beautiful than he does right now. You desperately want to tell him, so, so desperately, but instead you let yourself laugh with him, moving closer to the beat. You're moving in an imitation of some formal dance, a back and forth just between yourselves. It's impossible to stop smiling at him now that you've started, and maybe you're happier than you've been in a long time too.

It's- a bit of a blur, after that. There are times where Vyncent reaches a hand out to you and you dance together like that, a raver's waltz. He spins you a few times, and you're breathless with laughter after each one. You step out for a break, and Vyncent goes between various partners - but for once you don't feel that stab of jealousy, because his eyes keep darting back to you and he smiles wider each time. At some point, both of you end up mostly standing still in the middle of it all, giddy with infectious joy, with you leaning against his chest and his hand on your shoulder.

You look up at him then, and your faces are so, so close- in a crowded room, where anyone could bump into you... The temptation to just lean up and kiss him is almost unbearable. You could always brush it off as an accident if you had to - or you'd finally have something you've wanted for months. it's tantalising, having that choice dangled in front of you.

Before you can really do more than begin to lean in, though, Vyncent's eyes flicker away from your face and to the door. You'd almost missed it, because you were definitely paying more attention to his lips than his eyes, and you look away, guilt starting to eat into you.

He says something then, but your hearing's gone to shit right now so he gives up and untangles himself from you. He points at the door, then tilts his head at you in a clear question. We leaving now?

You... can't believe you almost did that. You nod at him, struck dumb by your thoughts. Outside, the sudden lack of noise feels almost like a physical weight being lifted, while the freezing temperature is like a slap in the face. You stumble forward into Vyncent, and he steadies you while you shiver and try calling a cab, because no fucking way are you walking home like this.

Home, ha. You know full well that Vyncent is more your home now than any building could be. Even if you keep almost fucking things up - the thought of not having him there is almost too much to bare.

But, for now, you have him. His arm around your shoulders again, trying to keep you warm while you wait for your cab, and the knowledge that when you wake up in the morning, he'll still be there. Neither of you are going anywhere.

#william wisp #vyncent sol #prime defenders #jrwi pd #jrwi #ghostknife #myfic #primedefenders #hi. smiles :3 thanks for 200. this was written mostly in one go. where all i did was listen to michael by frans ferdinand

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crmsnmth-journal · 5 months ago

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7/1/2024 9:01 PM

So I kind of screwed myself for the next two weeks, but it was needed and I had no choice. Which make me realize my descision to find a better job was in the right. I had to buy a new phone, and I don't mean a nice phone. I mean a $70 prepay Verizon phone. I've been using it for years, and have held my number for almost five years. You should know how truly impressive that is. For the longest time, I had a new number almost every other month, so having an actual long term number is my own little pride thing. Either way, I bought a 70 dollar phone, and that literally screws me this week. My savings, is a little over a hundred, and that's goign to get drained so I can get to and from work. I cut my cigarettes back, because I don't want to quit, but being forced to ration a pack might do some good for me on my whole wanting to cut back. It's going to be a long couple of weeks.

On the plus side, my black cap bushes are covered in berries. Usually, I get maybe a handful but this year, I might even get a bucket full. There's so many and they're just now starting to all ripen. I doubt they'll last to a bucket. They are my favorite forage of all summer. I don't know what it is this year, but the only berry that doesn't seem to be where it needs to be or more is the blackberries. All the bushes seem to be shriveled up and dried up.

I found an old friend from like ten or fifteen years ago. We were really close for a long time. The guy even lived at my dad's place for a while. We were tight. I had to tell this guy on three different occasions that he was being cheated on. Because no one else wanted to do it, or was close enough to him. It was through him that I actually got to go to the kind of parties I wanted to be a part of. I never fit in with that group, but it gave me a taste for a certain lifestyle. Anyway, every so often, I just kind of chech up on a few old friends. Watch from a far, kind of thing. I've had pretty awful luck at retrying to kindle a friendship. Everyone else has changed so much, and I'm just now figuring out a bunch of people my age already figured out. I sat seven years in hell, it stunted me, I have no excuse and I don't deny it. Whatever. So I look at their pages and celebrate their victories in silence. I can't even begin to tell you how proud I am of the person who was truly my best friend I've ever had. Or the friend who used to try and always steal my girlfriend (it never worked. not with him anyway). But there was one friend who I could never find. Until now. I found him on Linkedin, and then when I searched is name on that one blue social hell hole, I found him. We don't have one single mutual person of interest. I'm 99% it's a bot page eithere way. There's like over 1000 profiles added, and they all seem to be those bots that feast on the lonely. It's kind of funny where he and I ended up. Same field. Comparable story. And then poof. Both of us vanished from everyone. (His was welcomed, mine was completly unwanted due to manipulation and some serious mental abuse Karma was repaying me with). I reappeared a few years ago. He reappears now. I want to message him. Say something stupid like "Craazzzy bread" and see if he remembers the joke. But I won't. I've been let down too many times when trying to reconnect with the people who once meant the absolute world to me.

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ravika-spices · 1 year ago

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How to Make Delicious Chicken Dishes with Ravika Biryani Masala, Chicken Gravy Masala and Chicken Chilli Masala

If you love chicken and want to try some different recipes with it, then you are in the right place. In this blog post, I will show you how to make three mouth-watering chicken dishes using Ravika Biryani Masala, Chicken Gravy Masala and Chicken Chilli Masala. These are spice blends from Ravika Spices, a brand that offers authentic and quality spices for your kitchen. You can easily find them in any online store or supermarket⁵. They are packed with flavor and aroma and can transform your chicken into a feast.

Ravika Biryani Masala

Ravika Biryani Masala is an aromatic spice blend used to make biryani, a layered rice and meat dish. It contains spices like caraway seeds, stone flower, nutmeg, mace, fennel seeds, star anise, bay leaves, cloves, cardamom, cinnamon and more. You can use it to make chicken biryani, a popular dish that is cooked with marinated chicken, fried onions, saffron and basmati rice. Here is how to make it:

Ingredients

- 1 kg chicken pieces with bones

- 1 kg basmati rice

- 12 small onions, thinly sliced

- 10 tbsp ginger garlic paste

- 2 tsp red chilli powder

- 1 tsp garam masala powder

- 1 tsp pounded chilli

- 1/2 tsp black pepper powder

- 1 tsp turmeric powder

- 5 tbsp coriander powder

- Salt to taste

- 2 bay leaves

- 1 tsp cumin seeds

- 1/2 tsp nutmeg and mace powder

- 1/2 tsp badyan powder (fennel seed powder)

- 1/2 cup yogurt

- 6 large tomatoes, chopped

- 7–8 prunes (aalobukhara)

- 1 cup oil

- Whole spices: 2 green cardamom, 2 brown cardamom, 3 cloves, 3 black pepper, 2 cinnamon sticks

- Essence: 1 drop

For layering

- 5–6 green chillies, slit vertically

- A bunch of mint leaves

- 1 lemon, sliced

- Yellow food colour: 1/2 tsp in each layer

Method

1. Soak rice for 20 mins.

2. Heat oil and fry onion until they are golden brown. Take out and spread on paper. After they get crispy, grind them.

3. Add ginger garlic paste and fry for 20 mins or until the smell goes away. Add all the whole spices and chicken. Fry for a while. Add fried onion, yogurt, tomatoes, prunes. Cook until chicken is tender. Add badyan powder, nutmeg and mace powder and essence. Remove from stove.

4. Boil rice in a large pot with some mint leaves, whole spices and lemon juice. When rice is half-done, drain the water.

5. Divide rice and chicken into three parts. In another large pot, spread one layer of rice. On top of it, spread one part of chicken. Sprinkle food colour, mint leaves, green chillies and lemon slices. Repeat with the remaining rice and chicken.

6. Cover the pot with a tight lid and steam on low flame for 20 mins.

7. Serve hot with raita and salad.

Ravika Chicken Gravy Masala

Ravika Chicken Gravy Masala is a spice blend that can be used to make a rich and creamy gravy for your chicken curry. It contains spices like coriander seeds, cumin seeds, red chillies, turmeric powder, fenugreek seeds, asafoetida and more³. You can use it to make chicken gravy masala curry, a simple and easy dish that goes well with roti or rice. Here is how to make it:

Ingredients

- 500 g chicken pieces with bones

- 2 tbsp oil

- 1 tsp cumin seeds

- A pinch of asafoetida

- 2 onions, finely chopped

- 1 tbsp ginger garlic paste

- Salt to taste

- 2 tomatoes, pureed

- 2 tbsp Ravika Chicken Gravy Masala

- Water as needed

- Coriander leaves for garnishing

Method

1. Heat oil in a pressure cooker or a pan. Add cumin seeds and asafoetida. When they crackle, add onions and fry until golden brown.

2. Add ginger garlic paste and salt and fry for a few minutes.

3. Add tomato puree and Ravika Chicken Gravy Masala and cook until oil separates.

4. Add chicken pieces and water as needed. Mix well and pressure cook for 3–4 whistles or until chicken is cooked. If using a pan, cover and cook on low flame until chicken is done.

5. Garnish with coriander leaves and serve hot with roti or rice.

Ravika Chicken Chilli Masala

Ravika Chicken Chilli Masala is a spice blend that can be used to make a spicy and tangy chicken dish. It contains spices like red chillies, coriander seeds, cumin seeds, fennel seeds, fenugreek seeds, mustard seeds, curry leaves and more. You can use it to make chicken chilli masala fry, a dry and crispy dish that can be served as a starter or a side dish. Here is how to make it:

Ingredients

- 500 g chicken pieces with bones

- Salt to taste

- 1/4 tsp turmeric powder

- 2 tbsp oil

- 2 tsp mustard seeds

- A few curry leaves

- 2–3 green chillies, slit

- 2 tbsp Ravika Chicken Chilli Masala

- Lemon juice as needed

Method

1. Marinate chicken pieces with salt and turmeric powder for 15 mins.

2. Heat oil in a pan or a kadai. Add mustard seeds and curry leaves. When they splutter, add green chillies and chicken pieces. Fry on high flame for 10 mins, stirring occasionally.

3. Lower the flame and add Ravika Chicken Chilli Masala. Mix well and cook until chicken is dry and crisp.

4. Sprinkle lemon juice as needed and serve hot.

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talenlee · 2 years ago

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Game Pile: We Should Talk

We Should Talk is a 2020 conversational visual novel produced by Insatiable Cycle and released by Whitehorn games. The scenario is small, and simple, and intimate: You’re at a bar, your partner is at home, and you chat with some people face-to-face, and your partner via your phone, and… that’s it. You chat, then the story culminates in a decision point that starts with someone saying we should talk.

The game’s available on a bunch of platforms, particularly Steam and Itch, and if you’re in the right mood, right now, for a game that’s interesting, more than a game that tells a necessarily compelling story, or has specifically challenging gameplay, you should definitely consider checking it out. It’s been in a few bundles, you might even have it!

Now, if you want me to talk more about the game and how I feel about it, well, that’s spoiler territory, so let’s look at it after the fold.

The big draw of this game, and part of why it’s so ‘short’ when you actually recount the number of game choices you make, is that this is a game that wants to examine one specific point of the game’s systems, and that’s this conversation system. When you’re prompted to speak, the game gives you a text box, where statements are made up of a variety of different clauses, allowing you to tailor phrases out of pieces from exchange to exchange. This is a design interface that seems to suggest a lot of very precise fine-tuning, where every possible phrase is considered at least a little bit different to all its possible alternate permutations.

If that’s the case, then that kind of fractal spreading and careful flag management presents a game that’s packed in fairly tight in its small amount of time. The actual system is interesting to consider, and since the game is mostly about engaging with that system, it doesn’t really do anything that doesn’t fit into that system. This means that the game presents you with that conversation system, an NPC explains it diegetically, and from there, the whole game is about using that system.

Any backstory or surrounding details about your character are then told to you from implication. Characters mention seeing you in the past or dealing with something they know you’re interested in, and in so doing, the game uses its interface to do what it wants to do (encourage you to have conversations) while doing something to tell its story. It’s clever!

Now, that isn’t to say I responded to it really well, though. It feels like a game where authenticity is a big part of how it engages the audience, where these are very real-feeling conversations of real-feeling time hanging out at a real-feeling bar as a real-feeling person and I could sit here and pontificate about how well it captures that feeling, an ephemeral je nes sais quail but I’d be lying. I don’t know what it’s like to hang out at a bar. I don’t know what it’s like to get hit on at a bar. I don’t know what it’s like to meet up with an ex where there’s a little bit of a flame going on there and you’re thinking about it and so’s they, I simply do not know.

I’m not a bar guy! When I got the message from my partner at the start of the game about how she made food and wanted me there and that we lived together, I immediately wondered if I was supposed to just put the drink down and go home, because that seems the most obvious thing to do to me. I don’t like bars. I don’t get hit on. I don’t have a chequered past of complicated love interests. It’s all alien to me, and that means that for all that this seems like it’s authentic to someone else’s experience, it just made me feel awkward and, lacking no other word for it, cringe.

This is more important than you may think: Games use their fiction to encourage our ability to engage with them. If you drop me in a dungeon with a gun and some Nazis, I’m going to assume this game wants me to shoot Nazis with a gun rather than conduct seances to refine sweetened popcorn recipes. The unfamiliarity with this experience for me was weirdly uncanny, meaning in my first playthrough, I found myself stumbling around what choices to make, because I honestly didn’t know what the game wanted, or what it wanted me to want. Really, I thought it sounded like a stupid place to be, since my partner had just told me she was having a bad day and had food, but maybe I misunderstood the way the bar mattered to this character?

The result was a few playthroughs where I kind of just picked the most basic default answers I could, only changing things to avoid open and flagrant assholery. It’s funny, a lot of my involvement with this game could be reduced to pressing okay on default options, but I still felt like I played it. I also didn’t feel a want to explore, because all that exploration was in aid of avoiding my partner, who I have no reason, in the play throughs I did, to think of as anything but someone I care for who made me noodles.

It’s not like it isn’t interesting to engage with. Sitting and considering the different potential ramifications of the text system, the things you could do with it, was very interesting. I had no interest in doing it, I didn’t want to press okay on any of the alternate options, but that’s because the system was interesting to me and the fiction wasn’t. In the half-real world of videogames, the real rules caught my attention while the fictional world drifted right past me.

Fundamentally we’re talking about a design that requires you to work out what is defined and not told, and what’s not told and not defined. The result is that you’re groping around to find the shape of negative space, like a blind person investigating an elephant. It’s a mystery, of sorts, but rather than a murder or a political intrigue, you’re trying to divine the secret of why you’re a crappy girlfriend.

Interesting! Relationships-focused! Engaging! Praise upon praise for a game I didn’t like much!

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

#GamePile #Games

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christ2525 · 2 years ago

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Idle Heroes Updates

At the point when you are into playing a game as occurring as inactive legends, you would pass on to know about the most recent overhauls and extra highlights that continue to come your direction. Who could do without to be exceptional all things considered! It is very much like when you are hanging tight for another episode on your number one Network program and when it comes out you basically wouldn't have the option to hold your fervor. Continue to buzz with a total track on the most recent updates and additional items to the game given underneath as alongside their date of delivery.

Idle Heroes Updates

The request for deliveries will be most recent to most seasoned Date of delivery: eighth of Walk, 2019 Highlights: Abilities of the Vesa are totally beaten into another arrangement of abilities. The expense of getting Vera has been changed, accessible at the Wonderful Sanctuary There is an expectant change in the working of Bold preliminary. Keep a track as it would come in the impending month or in front of that The heavenly island is probably going to be revamped. This modification occurs after the alleged freedom of Phoenix in the game plot. Date of delivery: first of Walk, 2019 Highlights: Curiously, the unbelievable Ormus' abilities have increases The organization has gone on this time by getting very notable Japanese voice stars ready. Kugimiya Rie alongside Hikasa Yoko will be the voice overs for legends. How invigorating is this! Alongside these updates, there is a cost modification in Ormus' tab at the Wonderful sanctuary. Date of delivery: 23rd February 2019 Highlights: Players for the most part miss crushing on seal land. For this, a red speck has been set apart on the land now. This dab will go about as an update for the players The players will actually want to sell every one of the obsolete products like bunches and frozen yogurts. The players will see a revamped interface for the Society war Players will actually want to pack prizes subsequent to getting a particular measure of sweepstakes at the wishing wellspring. Presentation of the asylum mission wherein the players should satisfy all appointed errands to acquire rewards Four unique assortments would accessible for purchase now. Players can now report different players if there should be an occurrence of any bad conduct or wrongdoing Valkyrie will have now have a very surprising and new skin Date of delivery: 22nd January 2019 Highlights: Change in endorsing abilities: The whole means of authorizing has been changed. Players will see a total rebuilding of legend abilities Players will see a massive change in the action abilities of the legend Cthugha. Highlights of precisions have been changed. Players can now shut out the harm got by 30% with the utilization of each right working block, and the crit annihilation can be diminished by 20% Abilities presented for empowering: Flexibility - a player, will actually want to mend its legend by 15% towards the finish of a round for all the empty HP Imperativeness - this will permit the player to build HP by a decent 12% Cover - this element will help in dying down a risky assault by 15% Shared destiny - when the round closes, every one of the excess individuals from the group who have lived will actually want to get an extra 1.2 % assault. Strength - this element will raise the assault force of the player by 8% Deadly fightback - this is an extraordinary component where foes will confront extra obliteration of 12% while took part in a functioning or fundamental assault Development - the player will actually want to raise his HP by 5% of assault alongside a speed of 3% Change in legend includes: the legends making to the main 10 ten will get a ground level change of elements. A unique component has been added to Cthugha's cap wherein it will extend by 500% Different alterations: Change in accuracy highlight: a rate expansion in the accuracy by one percent will prompt a general increment of 0.3 percent in the harm Change in block highlight: each helpful block set will actually want to die down the obliteration by about a third and the extreme annihilation caused can be decreased by a decent 20 percent Expanded adequacy of the properties of legends. Exceptional deliveries for the promising event of the New Year for the Chinese: A presentation of a fresh out of the plastic new legend named Aida. She is a light legend, and she does equity by it. Fundamentally, she assumes the part of an adjudicator who will rebuff the players for being in a terrible light. Her point is to destruct the obscurity. New occasions for the spring celebration The kiss of the apparition will return for good New skins will be delivered for creating all legends New levels for the blankness pinnacle will be purchased out

Date of delivery: eighteenth of January, 2019 Highlight: this new delivery has an included button. By tapping on it, a player will actually want to gather every one of the mines from the divine land in one go. Date of delivery: sixteenth of January, 2019 Include: this will be incredibly invigorating for the players since they will currently see newly assembled skins on the legends - Lookout window and Valkyrie. Date of delivery: fourteenth of January, 2019 Highlight: direct intel on the forthcoming light legend was made accessible. Her appearance was set apart by lengthy lovely earthy colored hair, and her eye were absent. Evidently, the legend was an entertainer and ought to be called Leona or hectate. Date of delivery: ninth of January, 2019 Highlights: The change will be finished to the current jewel rate wherein The players are probably going to get more measure of pearls when they make another buy The players will partake in a better level of rebate on the acquisition of a top notch card for one time as it were The players will presently get 85 pearls as result rather than the past amount of 75 under a little superior card. Alterations in the assignments performed by Curio and courageous preliminary Update in curio: to go a step up, the players will currently be allowed to pick their own materials Pieces of antique: the player will actually want to incite numerous antiquities simultaneously from the parts Update in the daring preliminary store: extra symbols like "purchase in mass" and "reconfirm" will presently be accessible at the store.

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mountaindmned · 2 days ago

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Who were they? That taught you that? About ghosts, about… saving other people.

Jack almost considered not answering. He stirred the coals in the fire. The answer to that question was hours worth of storytelling. Right now, the focus was on Beth, on her upcoming choice. He wasn't one to sway her one way or the other.

Her life was her own to follow, and he was rebuilding the old traditions in his own way now.

But Jack had spoken the truth in those last two lines:

i sure could use the help,

your brother needs you still.

Could remember Gramps, all spitting over the flames as he came across the pyre they'd built for Skye's ex. The way Hawk had set her shoulders, stared him dead in the eye, Jack and Bluebird holding onto either of Gramp's arms--

Skye missed. It was a tragedy. It happens. I saw it.

With a shotgun, Skye is only a hair less than you. Gramps snarling with his face all etched in orange from the pyre.

Jack swallowed a knot in his throat, looked away from the flames. Up towards the snow drifting in from the stone. They should move towards the cabin soon, he'd unchain the fence and unlock the door and tell her all about his family, at some point. At some point.

It was easier, for now, to focus on the new round of stupid kids about to invade the mountain. There's no room for history.

"Oh. Hawk was my little sister. Skye was too." Not in a way Beth would understand but, it was easier to just use that word. "Gramps was big on saving everyone. No matter what. It was out duty." He held out his wrist, the brand on his forearm visible. "It's what this means. It's... An old tradition. You don't have one--" he hesitated, unsure if he should add the last bit stuck on his tongue. Finally says it anyway.

"You don't have it yet. Y'dont need one, not unless you want. We're, I'm... I'm starting from scratch now, there's... What's that phrase you used? There's wiggle room. But, uh. Once upon a time, this mark meant we saved everyone. Even if they were... Horrible. There's this woman, Sarah, she lived on the mountain awhile back and she ran off after... Well. Skye and Sarah both tested the rules of the brand. I think after Sarah, Gramps went a bit softer on Skye. Numbers were dwindling and he knew he'd lose Hawk too." He ran a hand through his hair. "Anyway. Anyway..." He thinned his lips. It felt so strange, talking about it. Opening up old wounds like this. "A-ny-way."

"I'm not going to make you a Fiddler if you don't want it. I'm perfectly fine with Beth Washington, so long as... so long as someone is helping, I guess." Hates the desperation, some sort of way Gramps must have felt. Bending the rules to keep the numbers. Needing people, sacrificing tradition. Where had that gotten them!?

Jack was the last Fiddler left. God what a spiral.

"Anyway. Uh. Sorry."

"But, I guess it was a compromise. Skye and Hawk twisting Gramps into changing the rules. If you're going to be haunted by a ghost, make sure it's one you want around."

Always just, hollowing out themselves for the sake of staying alive. Give an inch, another inch, another...

am I already that?

Jack hummed. "If you spend your whole life just angry, looking for vengeance... you might be. That's part of why Gramps had the rules.

"You're part of something bigger. Or, Fiddlers anyway. Mad Dogs. There's the spark that ignites the fire, sure. But the fire has different tongues of flame all destroying as a whole. There's a unity in that. You're not a person, you're part of a pack, a collective -- it-- I guess it doesn't apply much now. Just you and me. But..."

He leaned forward over the fire, a storytellers air. "The reason we're called Mad Dogs. There's a painting in the library of the night we first defeated the Damned. Mind you, this was my grandpa Joseph, not me. It's a bunch of teenagers, all gripping each other tight as they can. you can see their knuckles white. They're all so happy they survived, mostly. They all started dancing in the streets, laughing like mad dogs barking. A wildfire blazed in the background, their eyes and toothy smiles all painted orange.

"They'd lived. So they clung to the survivors. Gramps, he, he carried that. Taught it to our parents and to us. In numbers, we survive.

"The way you don't become like that.... You have other people around you. At least you're going mad together, I guess is what I'm saying.

"The girl in your book, she pushed everyone away, didn't she? She got obsessed because no one could distract her, pull her out of it. That's why you see me playing fiddle or, or fixing the truck or cooking. You have to have a life outside of the pain. You have to. I'm damn sorry I don't have a pack anymore, I think it would do you good.

"You've still got your brother. He needs saving, doesn't he?"

Maybe, he'll take her down to see Sarah or Kira, maybe that would help. Kira is about her age.

"There were times when we didn't see eye to eye. Me and Gramps or Skye or, hell even Hawk. But we still have a history. We've been through shit no one understands. It's a pack mentally, the.... Outside and those inside. These kids.... They hurt you, I get that. Trust me. But you all know each other. You can't replace that. It means something, even if it means something terrible."

He threw the last orange peel into the fire with a scowl. "But, I'm just a crazy old kook who lives on a mountain. I don't have answers."

One. He could hear Hawk whistle at him, in those moments when he woke with his sleeping bag cold with terror-sweat. The meaning as clear as the ice on Hannah's eyelids. You saved at least one. Trying to comfort him from beyond the stars.

Jesus. Jack listened, bit back the rants about technology and cruelty. No. He just listened, he'd asked, it was only right to help carry the grief pouring out.

He took the orange peel in his hands and twisted it, ripping it restlessly. Monsters came in all shapes and sizes. Remembered how Hawk had first introduced Skye to the mountain. A car almost out of gas, a shiner and a split lip. She needs help, she needs to heal. Hawk had argued. Gramps simply asked if she could throw a few logs on the fire. Hawk buzzed around her the entire night, hands on shoulders and a glare at anyone who came too close.

Prank. Skye had taught him that word, wasn't used much on the mountain. He still didn't understand it. There were a lot of words he didn't understand but it didn't exactly bother him. Dumping a bucket of water on someone, spooking them by jumping out somewhere. No. Things worked different on the mountain. Water couldn't be wasted like that, spooking someone might get you punched. Worst was some scary stories around the campfire. Their lives were filled enough with panic and fear. Fear was a sacred tool. Not something fun. The life up here was so sharply divided into joy and terror. It wasn't welcome to taint one with the other.

"Doesn't sound like a prank to me." Sounded like the kind of thing you'd shoot someone over.

He wondered, sure maybe a little bitter: what kind of cushy, sheltered lives had these kids had, to think that sort of thing was funny? He worked his jaw, threw a few bits of orange peel into the fire.

He looked up. Looked Beth in the eye as her voice grew darker. Could see Hawk in the way she held her anger, saw Skye in the chase for injustice. In the flickering fire, saw both sitting next to her, hands on Beth's shoulders.

"I can't say I disagree." He looked off at Hawk, saw her nod. He stirred the fire. "They don't sound like they deserve saving. I'm not going to kick you out because you don't want to save them." She doesn't have her mark yet anyway. But, it's not as if Gramps is around to care much even if she did have it. Life up here is too thin and haggard for any sort of hard rules anymore.

And no one had cared much when Skye had 'missed' that shot. They'd burned the body, left no questions asked.

"But I'm going anyway. The way I grew up-- I'm not saying you gotta agree with it-- we save everyone. It's not some high ground, it's just easier to sleep at night. If you're going to have ghosts haunting you, might as well be people you want sticking around.

"Besides. You've got to keep your brother safe, right?"

#cataschism #stole a pair of boots that could handle the cold (beth & jack)#LONG!!!!!! I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE UGHHHHH #dm if you want to plot #long post cw #save ;;#(I'm proud of this as long as it is)#queue ;;

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yoongis-black-grilfriend · 2 years ago

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Windy Picnic

Summary: Eddie just can't get over how pretty you are.

Warning: Smut (Minors DNI), Eddie has a tongue piercing (that vibrates), Oral sex (female receiving), Cussing, Public Sex (no one is around so don’t worry). Please let me know if I am missing any. Thank you for reading!

This idea just came into my head to let me know if this is terrible I don't write smut that often.

It was a gloomy day in Hawkins Indiana and your boyfriend Eddie had decided that it would be a perfect idea for you guys to have a picnic. You made some sandwiches to eat and packed a bunch of fruits and soon after you were on your way to the field you and Eddie like to go to.

Your destination was filled with all kinds of different colored flowers and It was absolutely beautiful. When you guys arrived you were so excited to get out of Eddie's car, you almost fell trying to get out of it. Your darling boyfriend saw this and hurried up to get the stuff out of his car. The two of you walked toward the field to get your picnic set up with him carrying everything that you packed and with you holding on to his arm while you looked for a good spot to set up at.

When you find it Eddie lays down your blanket and you sort all the food on it as Eddie sits down to make sure that the blanket didn’t fly away. Finally, when you finish setting up the picnic you sit down next to Eddie with a smile on your face.

You loved when the weather was like this. It was cold and it was windy but that didn’t make you want to stay inside (although you love the idea of staying inside and cuddling with Eddie in these weather conditions) it made you want to have a windy picnic with the love of your life.

You're completely in your thoughts that you don't even see your boyfriend pull out the strawberries you cut up and dip one in the warm chocolate you heated up. Until you feel the savory chocolate at your lips making eye contact with Eddie you take a bite out of the strawberry without breaking any eye contact. When you taste it your eyes roll to the back of your head as the taste of it was so good.

This action made Eddie get a little excited, but who could blame him? You came out of the house wearing a cute pink short sundress (that he could tell you didn’t have any panties on under), and you made all the sweet sounds that he was used to making you make. Eddie’s happy that something told him to wear the new tongue piercing he got from a local sex store that had 6 different vibrating modes because right now he didn’t want anything more than to taste you in this beautiful setting with no one around.

He couldn’t take it anymore when he saw a part of your dress get blown by the wind revealing your bare core. “Pretty girl, why don’t you like back while I help you relax, hm?” You already knew what he was trying to do and you were not opposed to the idea at all so you lay back on the blanket and look at the dark gray clouds up above you.

Feeling his coldness from the rings on his fingers you take in a deep breath for what's about to come. Eddies slow with his hands and he moves them all over your body when he gets to your hips he gives them a tight squeeze and groans. “You are so fucking pretty your whole body looks like it belongs in a fucking museum”. Feeling embarrassed you cover your face from him but not for long because he takes your hands off your face and says “Don’t hide your gorgeous face from me, beautiful you know what I'm saying is true ''.

Going back to exploring your body with his hands Eddie wraps his hands around your neck as he gives you a very sloppy kiss on your lips you're trying to kiss him back but you can't concentrate at all with his hands around your neck. Feeling yourself starting to get wet you rub your core against Eddie's black skinny jeans and you whimper at the little relief it gives you as you suck on Eddie's tongue.

Pressing on the top of his piercing with the roof of his mouth Eddie circles his tongue around your lips so you can feel the vibration of his tongue and with one last kiss, Eddie pulls away from your lips and can't help but to feel himself get harder as he sees the string of saliva that connected you two.

Going from your neck all the way down from your stomach Eddie drags his tongue down your body with his tongue piercing now the 2nd vibration. He stops to look into your eyes before he lays his tongue flat on your clit. “Oh my gosh Eddie that feels so good baby” you cry out with tears already forming in your eyes. Your lover makes sure to keep a tight hold on your tights as he holds them open for his snack (BYE because why did I think this was okay- an).

Moving his tongue around your pussy you feel yourself getting wetter as you start to move your hips into his face and he moans as he feels your sweet juices coating his mouth. “Keep fucking your hips onto my face pretty girl all of this right here is yours and you can't do anything you want baby I would do anything to make the pretty fucking face of yours come all over my mouth”

Moved by his words you go faster and reach your hands down into his curly hair to move his mouth deep into your core. Suddenly you feel yourself start to shake as the vibration become stronger and you feel two fingers slip into your entrance fucking you at a fast pace.

Your breathing becomes harder because you're losing your breath with all the pleasure you're receiving and all you see is darkness as your eyes feel like their glue to the back of your head. You feel Eddie lightly tap the side of your face with his other hands and when you look at him he detaches his mouth from your slit. “I’m not letting you come until you're looking directly into my face. I want to see your beautiful face as you fall apart,” he growled.

“Okay, Daddy.” With those words, he gets back to pleasuring you and moves his fingers inside of you even faster. You so desperately want to close your eyes and tilt your head back but you feel a pit down off the bottom of your abdomen that you do not want to go away.

Turning up the piercing one more time Eddie moves his tongue along with your hips and looks directly into your eyes. You are shaking and with a couple more thrusts of your hips, you explode into an orgasm as explosive as the fireworks on the 4th of July you sob as you feel yourself squirt all over Eddie's face.

Eddie moves up to your face as he gives you kisses all over with a smile on his face. “Thank you for letting me pleasure my pretty girl.” You hear him say as he presses a kiss to your forehead then you guys feel something wet fall around you guys and you were surprised to see that it had started raining.

OMG i feel like this is so cringy but I just wanted to get this out there but please tell me what you guys think this is my first Eddie smut. Thank you <333!

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tootiredmotel · 3 years ago

Text

a different lover is not a sin

or: 5 times Dean didn't go to Pride + 1 time he did

Happy @starrynightdeancas gift exchange posting day!!! This one's for the wonderful and talented @andzia267 !!! Sending you all the hugs and good vibes, and I hope you enjoy it! And thank you Sophie for hosting all this, you're a rock star! <3

Read on ao3 or below / 5.5k words

CW: homophobia, queer used as a slur, john winchester being an asshole

1 - 1994

Dean was fifteen years old when he found out that being gay was something people could be proud of. It was early in the morning, they'd left their motel about 20 minutes before, and Sammy had fallen asleep in the backseat. The sun was just starting to completely show over the horizon, and they were driving through– or rather, struggling to get out of– Phoenix on their way to a possible poltergeist in Tucson. Every street they tried to take was blocked for the big event, and dozens of people already lined the sidewalks with colorful outfits and signs.

"Fuckin' queers," John grumbled in the seat next to him. "Never should'a thrown that damn brick."

Big banners overhead displayed "Stonewall 25: A Global Celebration of Pride". Dean made a mental note to hit up a library once they got to Tucson to look that up, "Stonewall". In the meantime, he was mesmerized staring out the window. Guys held hands, women kissed, everyone was practically vibrating with excitement. A black man in heels and a wig caught his gaze through the window and waved. Dean started to wave back, but his hand was harshly swatted back down.

"Do not," John said. "Don’t talk to them, don’t even look at ‘em. These people are sick in the head."

Dean focused his gaze on his lap until they were out of the city, and his mind wandered back to the gas station they stopped at the day before. He thought of the guy at the cash register that called him "cutie" and winked at him as he bought a candy bar for Sammy and beers for Dad with his fake ID. By Dad’s logic– which Dean trusted, of course–, that cashier, that queer, must've been sick in the head.

Then Dean remembered how his heart sped up, how his ears got hot, and how for a second he let himself think the cashier was kinda cute too. He realized he must also be sick in the head, and the thought was making him feel actually, physically sick. He felt like throwing up. Dad could never know.

Dean was fifteen years old when he learned that being gay actually wasn't something to be proud of.

---

2 - 2000

Dean was 21 years old when he learned the word “bisexual”. Dad had caught word of a ghoul case in lower Manhattan and sent Dean to take care of it. It was starting to get too hot and the streets were too crowded, but Dean was mostly glad to get a break from the constant fighting between Dad and Sammy.

Except it was June, and every time he turned a corner, there they were. The Pride parade flyers.

The second he spotted a rainbow he averted his gaze. He turned another corner and spotted another one. He avoided reading them at all costs. He heard Dad’s voice. Sick. Sick in the head.

For years now Dean had pretended he wasn’t sick. He pretended to not stare at Patrick Swayze too much whenever Dirty Dancing played on TV. He pretended like he didn't imagine what it would be like to kiss a guy, what stubble would feel like against his lips if he ever did.

He liked women. He could stick to women. He could live his whole life like that. And that meant he wasn’t totally sick, right? He wasn’t gay -gay if he liked girls.

But then what the hell was he? Would he even belong at one of these Pride things if he wanted to? He was probably a freak of nature. Even sicker than the rest of the bunch.

Curiosity got the best of him. He spared a glance at one of the flyers as he waited to cross the street.

Gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transexuals, ALL WELCOME

“Are you gonna go?” A voice next to him asked. ”It’s next weekend.” He was blond, pale, and a bit shorter than Dean.

“What? No! I don't swing that way,” Dean said, a bit too quickly and with too much bite.

The guy looked him up and down with a frown. “Geez, alright. Just askin’.”

He started to walk away, and Dean spoke up before he could stop himself.

“Hey man, wait.”

The guy stopped walking.

“Sorry, can I ask you something? Assuming you... know about this stuff?”

He seemed exasperated, but he turned anyway, willing to hear Dean out. Dean licked his lips, rubbed at the back of his neck, swallowed nervously. He couldn’t believe he was doing this, asking a stranger on the street about something so personal. At least the chances of meeting this person ever again were close to none.

“What’s bisexual?”

The guy’s features softened a bit. He seemed to understand something about Dean that so far Dean refused to acknowledge.

“It means you’re into more than one gender. And yes, you can do that,” the guy said. He flashed Dean a tight smile and then disappeared into the crowd.

Dean felt his hands go numb and balled them into fists, shoving them in his pockets. He took a deep breath through his nose. The guy said you. You are. You can.

The guy didn’t know what he was talking about. He knew nothing about Dean. He was wrong.

Or maybe he was right.

But he couldn’t be.

Dean couldn’t be… that.

Dean was 21 years old when he decided he wasn’t bisexual. He wasn’t anything. He was also 21 when he solved a case in record time (two days), just so he could book it out of New York before the next weekend arrived.

---

3 - 2004

By the time he was 25 years old, Dean knew he was bi. He hated it, he never spoke about it, and he ignored it as much as he could, but he was aware of it. And he knew he was bi because, at 25 years old, he’d already gone through two serious breakups, and they both equally sucked.

The first was Lee. He hunted with Dean and John for about a year, the second half of which Dean and Lee spent sneaking around and hooking up behind John’s back. It was fun, and hot, and exciting, and some of the best hookups he’d had up until that point in his life were with Lee.

But the thing is that it wasn’t just hooking up. They were close, and Dean liked him. A lot. They kissed for the first time after a particularly scary werewolf hunt in which Dean almost died, but John was more preoccupied with the mostly-unharmed victim than his own son. Dean and Lee rode in the backseat, bruised, bloody, and quiet. When John went to walk the victim up to her apartment, Lee reached over and placed a hand on Dean’s back, asking him if he was okay. Dean fell into Lee’s arms, and they kissed as they pulled away from the embrace, soft and comforting. It was Dean’s first kiss with a guy.

Lee was a lot of firsts for Dean over the next few months. But then John almost caught them once, drunk and making out in the Impala.

And then that case in Arizona went wrong, and Lee just couldn’t take it anymore. He packed up, swore off hunting, hugged Dean goodbye, and left him in the dust.

Dean needed to clear his head after that. He could barely look his dad in the eye after that close call, couldn't let him see the sorrow he was feeling. With every interaction, he imagined how John would yell at him, probably try to beat it out of him, if he noticed all he was feeling over Lee. Or worse, John could ignore him, practically disown him like he did Sam.

So he also packed up and left. Went hunting on his own for a while.

It was on one of those hunts that he met Cassie, and she was yet another handful of firsts for Dean over the course of a few months. She was amazing, and he fell hard and fast, but of course that went up in flames too.

Then again, he should've known better than to be honest. Honesty only ever got him in trouble.

He’d just left her back in Ohio and was working at a bar in Indianapolis for a few weeks to make some cash. He’d eventually meet back up with Dad. He just couldn’t right now. Not with Sam gone to college. Not after getting his heart broken twice over within a year.

He was hyper-aware of the end of June approaching. He knew it was coming, Indy had a pretty big celebration, and he made sure to be working all day that day so he wouldn't have to face it.

That was pointless, though. Toward the end of the day, a big group of about ten or twelve people who were clearly coming from the parade stumbled into the bar. One of them was apparently the owner’s little sister and they went there every year after the celebrations. They were loud, and obnoxious, and looked incredibly happy. Their happiness was contagious, and Dean loved serving them. He chatted them up, got to know them a bit, and heard all about the parade, all while staring down anyone at the bar who dared look their way with even the slightest stink eye.

But watching them that happy and comfortable, seeing not one, but two pairs of guys sloppily leaning against each other and sharing the occasional kiss while none of their friends seemed to bat an eye… something in Dean ached. Deeply.

Dean was 25 years old when he realized that a small part of him kind of, sort of, wanted to be part of this community. He couldn’t though. Not if he wanted to be on good terms with Dad. Not if he aimed to be the man Dad wanted him to be.

He left Indianapolis the next day.

---

4 - 2008

Dean was 29 years old and on his own personal highway to hell when he learned his brother went to a Pride parade before he ever did. They were driving through San José, the streets were lined with ads for Silicon Valley Pride, and Sam just casually decided to mention how fun it was the last time he went.

Thankfully they were at a red light, or else Dean probably would’ve slammed the breaks. He twisted to look at Sam head-on, his arm on the back of the seat.

“You what ?” he gawked.

Sam shrugged innocently. “What?”

“You went to one of these Pride things?”

“Yeah, dude.”

Dean’s brain was just trying and failing to load. “Why?” he finally asked.

“Jessica was in the GSA and some friends invited us. It was awesome.”

“She was in the what?”

“The G. S. A.,” Sam answered slowly. “Gay-Straight Alliance.”

“Oh.” Whatever that is, Dean thought. He kept eyeing the flyers. It was tomorrow.

“Green.”

“What?”

“Light’s green. Green means go.”

Dean rolled his eyes. "Shut up."

He kept driving and turned up the radio. Somebody To Love was playing, and as much as he liked Queen, he had to change the station. He tried to picture his little brother (his straight little brother) wearing rainbow face paint and having the time of his life at this thing. How come Sammy got to go when Dean could barely entertain the idea? Dean was the not-straight one. It wasn’t fair.

He channeled his jealousy into gripping the steering wheel.

“You okay, Dean?”

“Yeah.” No. “Yeah, m’fine.”

Dean was 29 years old when he died and went to hell without ever having gone to a Pride parade, knowing that his idiot ( straight! ) little brother already had.

---

5 - 2014

Dean was alive again and 35 years old (75, if you count hell) when he was formally invited to a Pride parade for the first time. It was a couple of days after that whole mess with Cas in Lucifer’s crypt, and he called Charlie. He just wanted to hear her voice, needed to know he was still on good terms with at least one of his best friends.

“So anyway,” Charlie said after a while of recounting what she’d been up to. "How single are you right now? My answer is: miserably."

Dean chuckled. Then he thought of Cas, and the smile disappeared. "Yeah, you and me both, sister."

“Would you mind coming with me to this thing next month? Going alone kinda sucks.”

Dean put the phone on speaker and placed it on the library table as he sat down with a beer. “What’s the thing?”

“Pride.”

Dean was glad no one was around to see him almost choke on his drink.

“You good?”

“Yeah, what was that?”

“Pride parade. Don’t have anyone to go with this year.”

“Why uh… Why? Why me?”

She knows.

“I dunno.”

She knows she knows she knows.

“You’re my friend, Dean. Thought maybe you might be interested. But never mind, I guess.”

And while all the alarms in Dean's head were blaring danger danger danger abort, he also hated to hear Charlie so disappointed.

“Hey, no, listen, Charlie, I… I would. Really. You know I support you, wholeheartedly." And that's obviously the only reason I would want to go. "But with Sam doing these trials, and Cas on the run with the angel tablet–”

“It’s okay Dean, I get it. Talk to you soon?”

“Yeah.”

And she hung up.

Dean knew, at this point, that there was nothing wrong with being queer. It wasn’t anything to be ashamed of, and it sure as hell didn’t mean you were wrong in the head or whatever.

But years of pretending to be a false version of yourself in an effort to please a man who was impossible to please wasn’t exactly an easy habit to break. As much as he wished it didn't, as much as he wished he could just exist, the thought of anyone finding out still made him sick to the stomach.

John’s voice still echoed in his ears. His words still drove Dean’s sense of self-worth and so many of his decisions. He tried to never stare at a good-looking guy for too long. He tried to not get too into it with Benny. He tried to keep his feelings for Cas at bay, tried to keep him at arm's length, tried to keep the fact that he was in love (deeply, stupidly in love) as close to his chest as he could.

Even that night at the crypt choking out the words to get through to Cas, he couldn’t bring himself to say what he meant. I love you, he’d wanted to say, because it was the truth. What came out, however, was I need you. And he did, he needed Cas more than air, but it wasn't quite everything.

It still got his heart split in two.

Was he so far gone over Cas that he couldn’t hide it? Had he been trying so hard and failing just as miserably this whole time? Was his attraction to dudes that obvious? Or did Charlie just have a sixth sense for this kinda thing?

It was probably the last one. He hoped it was.

Cas knew, for sure. Angels knew everything right? They could read minds, feel longing, or whatever. And if none of that ever tipped him off, well, Dean put it all on the line back in that crypt. He told Cas how he felt, told him he needed him, tried putting himself out there, and it got him left. Again. With Dean, it was always leave-or-get-left when it came to love. He was tired of it.

Dean was 35 years old, desperately in love with his best friend, and truly heartbroken for the third time in his life, when his other best friend– an out and proud lesbian– gave him a chance to go to Pride, to break through his shell, to finally embrace himself as he was; but because he was practically living in the closet, he couldn’t seem to find the handle after so many years of purposefully ignoring its existence, and he missed his chance. Besides, what was the point of going to a celebration of love without the love of his life by his side?

---

+1 - 2021

Dean is now 42 years old and the happiest he’s ever been. The love of his life? Cas? Turns out he’s felt the same way all along. They're kind of together now, and slowly but surely they’re working through a decade’s worth of shit.

They’ve been raising a kid together too, along with Sam and Eileen, and that kid is also God. After saving the world and whatnot, Jack decided to bring back some of their friends and family that died over the years: Mary, Kevin, Charlie. Yes, there are two Charlies now, but it’s not as confusing as you’d expect. (One is from another dimension, and the other one is Dean’s little sister. Simple.) Mary’s off hunting most of the time and Kevin’s applying to college.

They’ve got extended family now too, Jody and the girls. OG Charlie is staying with them for now, while she finds her footing. Most of that household is queer. Most of Dean's household is queer as well, actually. Turns out both Jack and Eileen are non-binary, Cas is gay in the broader sense of the word, and Dean…

Dean is bi. And everyone knows now.

Apparently, a lot of people had known for a long time. Sam has known since the siren back in ‘09 (even though Dean stands by the fact that it wasn’t like that, Sammy ), and everyone has slowly picked up on his and Cas’s thing over the years, so there’s that.

He still feels a bit weird about it. About calling Cas his boyfriend, about having the freedom to hold his hand in public, about the fact that they now have goddamn pride flags hung around the bunker. He feels even weirder about the fact that John’s voice in his head is now drowned out by the sounds of his home life, more lively and supportive than he ever expected to have.

He wasn’t expecting any of this, he didn’t think everything would change so fast. But when you spend the better part of your life pushing down such a huge part of you and then finally give yourself an out, a chance to show the people who love you who you really are, everything just... follows.

Love follows. Acceptance follows. Family follows. And he wasn’t really expecting any of it.

He certainly doesn’t expect it when Cas walks into the library after his weekly Thursday evening call with Claire and announces, matter-of-factly and with air quotes, “We’re going to "Pride" this weekend.”

Dean’s stomach drops. It’s the Sioux Falls Pride Parade and Festival, it’s in two days, and they’re leaving tomorrow to spend the night at Jody’s so they can all be there bright and early Saturday morning. Everyone immediately starts bustling about, packing and planning outfits and gathering flags to bring with them.

Dean just goes to his room– his and Cas’s now– to pack a small duffle.

Well, he means to. Instead, he takes out the duffle from the closet, puts it on the bed, and sits next to it for a while. An hour goes by. He thinks back to all those times he had brushes with one of these things and was just never in the right mindset. He’s not even sure he’s in the right mindset now, but he’s going. It’s happening.

“Jack’s all ready to go,” Cas says when he walks in. “We spent about half an hour putting together an outfit for Saturday. He wanted it to be as colorful as possible.”

Dean smiles, but it’s not all there. He looks at the empty duffle next to him.

“Yeah, I might need some help with that myself.”

Cas is in sweats and a hoodie. Yes it’s June, yes it’s hot, but he’s a quasi-angel, and the way he experiences the world Dean will never be able to wrap his head around. He walks over and stands in front of Dean, running a hand through his hair and down the side of his face until he’s cupping Dean’s jaw. Dean takes Cas’s hand and leaves a few kisses on the inside of his wrist, closing his eyes as he does.

Cas regards the empty bag and hums quietly, as if in thought, before walking over to their closet. Dean chases his hand, holding onto it until he’s completely out of reach. Cas starts searching, and Dean’s stomach knots more and more with each clang of the hangers. Cas finally pulls out a flannel from its hanger– purple with hints of blue and pink– and tosses it over. Dean can’t believe he didn’t think of it first.

They continue to pack in comfortable silence before changing and getting into bed. Dean doesn’t flop onto his stomach or cuddle into Cas’s side as he usually does; instead, he lies on his back and stares at the ceiling in a daze.

“Dean?” Cas’s voice snaps him out of it.

Dean turns his head and asks, automatically, “You okay?”

It’s a habit by now, asking each other that question. It’s part of the working-through-a-decade’s-worth-of-shit thing they’re doing. Turns out they share a whole lot of trauma. They share worries and insecurities. They share nightmares sometimes, mostly about the Empty.

“I’m okay,” Cas says, putting his hand on top of Dean’s heart for him to hold, and Dean can breathe a little easier.

“You nervous about this thing?” Dean asks, interlocking their fingers.

“The parade? No, not really.”

And then, because he's been working on communicating how he's feeling out loud or whatever, Dean looks back up at the ceiling and says, "I am. Kinda."

He feels Cas shifting and propping himself up on his elbow, and then he's in Dean's line of sight. Dean's gaze is drawn to him, like all of him has been since the moment they met, and Dean can't believe he just has this now. He has a boyfriend, and it's Cas, and he's looking down at Dean with stars in his eyes and a comforting smile that actually works because it's Cas.

And then Cas is leaning down and softly pressing their lips together, and that's also something Dean can’t believe he gets to do: kiss Cas good morning and good night and at any moment in between, kiss him I'm sorry, kiss him we're going to be okay, kiss him I love you.

"I love you too, Dean," Cas says once they've pulled away, and Dean didn't even realize he'd said it out loud, but it doesn't matter. "And you don't need to be nervous. I'll be there with you."

The thought should be a thousand times more nerve-wracking, not just going to Pride but going to Pride with Cas on his arm. It's not nerve-wracking at all, and he soon drifts off to sleep.

Friday goes by faster than it should. The six-hour drive to Sioux Falls, although packed in a car with five people, goes by in a blink. They stop for provisions before getting to Jody's, filling up on backpacks' worth of snacks.

They get to the house and are met with endless hugs and excitement to match. Patience, Alex, and Jody are already working on dinner for the bunch, while Charlie, Donna, and Kaia are running around prepping for the next day and dragging along a hesitant but nevertheless happy Claire. Dinner is chaotic and loud and there are way too many people at the table, and Dean has to step outside after a while.

He sits on the back porch steps. Claire joins him. She's holding a beer, he's not. He hasn't been drinking for a few months now. They don't talk, but she leans her head on his shoulder and they stay there a while, looking at the stars.

When they go back inside, Claire sits back down in her spot at Cas's left, across the table from Dean, and leans on his shoulder for a while too. It's her way of saying she cares, of saying I missed you without really saying it. Jack sits at Cas's right, talking excitedly with Patience about some tv show or other, and the image fills Dean with such fondness that he reaches over with his foot, presses it to Cas's ankle, and keeps it there for the rest of the night.

Dean, Cas, Jack, Sam, and Eileen spend the night spread out around in the living area while the girls sleep in their respective rooms, and Dean is only slightly less nervous as he falls asleep holding Cas’s hand.

---

The nerves all come flooding back as he’s parking the Impala the next morning.

They’re not able to get even remotely close to Phillips Avenue since the streets are so full. They park the three cars that all twelve of them came in as close as they can and then have to walk for another twenty minutes. From blocks and blocks away, people walk and holler and greet them excitedly, many of them trying to circle this swarm of flanneled individuals that are taking up a whole sidewalk. Granted, Dean and Claire are the only ones in their usual kind of outfit. The rest of the bunch is wearing as many colors as they could compile from their closets, half of them are wearing face paint, and the other half are carrying an assortment of pride flags.

They fit right in.

The walk toward the main avenue of the parade is kind of a blur for Dean. He knows he waved at a few people, some friends of Alex from high school joined the group at some point, and Jack already grabbed a snack from his backpack.

The actual parade is also kind of hazy. Getting out of the house that morning had been probably even more chaotic than the night before, so they’re a bit late and the parade has already been going for a good half hour. On top of that, they accidentally merge into it not quite at the starting point but a bit further down the road, in between a decked-out pickup truck and a group of people with dogs. Music is blaring, the dogs are all barking, a big float rides a few yards in front of them, and hundreds stand on the sidewalks recording on their phones and cheering them along.

Dean’s not sure they’re even supposed to be in the actual parade. Maybe they’re supposed to be on the sidewalks? Is this right? What is happening, what is he even doing here?

He doesn’t notice how heavy he’s breathing until Cas is squeezing his hand and beckoning him to meet his eyes. He does, and the blue in them, as imposing as the Atlantic, drowns out everything else around them. “You’re okay, my love,” Cas says. It’s a fact. As long as Dean is with him, he’s okay.

On his other side, Dean feels someone link their arm around his. It’s Charlie, and she’s beaming at them, her cheeks almost as red as her hair. It brings Dean back to reality, grounds him, but he’s okay now. He’s not alone, and he’s meant to be here.

He’s proud to be here.

The parade leads up to a sloping park, and at the lowest point of it, there’s a stage where Dean assumes someone will MC for the afternoon, or maybe perform. It’s grandiose in its simplicity, kind of like a Greek theater, with everyone settling down on the grass around it, expectantly.

“We’ll be right back,” Dean hears Sam say, and he turns to find they’re all set to spend the afternoon, towels laid and backpacks off (save for his). “Jack wants to go meet the drag queens,” Sam says with just a bit too much glee before he and Jack take off.

“It’s not just Jack,” Eileen smiles and follows.

Cas is already sitting, eating one of the PB&Js he packed as lunches for everyone. Jody and Donna are settling down as well and Charlie’s taking a dozen pictures, but the rest of the girls are all standing. “We’re gonna go check out the vendors,” Claire announces, and they start to take off as well.

“Be careful, please!” Dean calls after them, but they pay him no mind. He turns to Charlie. “Hey, your majesty, keep an eye on them will you?”

She smiles, bows gracefully, and heads in the same direction.

Jody stands and grabs Dean by the arm, beckoning him to talk in private for a second.

“What’s up?”

If Dean knows Jody at all, and he does, they’re on the brink of a mom talk.

“Look around, Dean.”

“What for?”

“Just look,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Please?”

So, at her request, Dean starts taking in the environment. Now that everyone is gathered, he can actually see all the people that came out (heh) for the event. There are church groups, pet shelters, skateboarders, and rollerskaters. Drag queens are already taking pictures by the stage, and at least two people are wearing unicorn heads. A few vendors’ tents and food trucks surround the park, and rainbows completely dominate the scenery. There are elders, and kids, and all kinds of families and couples, and everyone looks… happy. Free.

And Dean is here with them. He is one of them.

There’s no danger, no monsters of any kind. No one to judge him, hurt him, call him sick in the head.

He finds Claire’s blonde head amongst the sea of shoppers at the edge of the park. She’s holding hands with Kaia and has one of the biggest smiles Dean has ever seen on her face. There’s no shame in it, and she’s not in any danger either. Things are different now, and she has the freedom to be herself that he never had at her age.

He has it now too. He can be himself.

Dean doesn’t realize he’s about to cry until Jody pulls him down into a hug.

“Dean, I am so proud of you.”

And then he cries.

---

They spend the afternoon laying on the grass, eating, drinking, and enjoying the festivities. The girls come back from the vendors’ tents after a full hour, and most of the bags on their arms are Charlie’s. She gets Cas a mug that says bee yourself in rainbow colors with an image of a cartoon bee, and she gets Dean a button pin that says AC/DC in pink and blue. There’s a meaning behind that apparently, and Dean decides he’ll look it up later.

Jack memorizes all the drag queen’s names. Donna takes a million pictures. They trade numbers with a few people.

There’s a big fireworks show just after sundown. It starts to get windy and a bit chilly, so Dean grabs the nearest pride flag and wraps it around himself. Cas, the perpetual freak who just doesn’t feel temperature apparently, is wearing a t-shirt and shorts and smiling at him unabashedly.

“What?”

“That’s the bisexual flag.”

So it is. “Shut up,” Dean says, but he’s smiling too. “You want in on this?”

He doesn’t wait for Cas to respond before he wraps it around his shoulders as well. The fireworks continue.

“You know,” Cas says after a beat. “As beautiful as they are, pyrotechnics are extremely damaging to the environment.”

Dean can’t help but laugh because of course, Cas would say something like that in a moment like this. He laughs and laughs and regrets being the only one to have heard that; then again, he’s the only one who could’ve found that funny.

He laughs a bit more, wipes a tear, and sees that Cas is still just solemnly watching the show.

“Cas?”

“Yes, Dean?” He replies and then turns his head.

Dean wants to kiss him. He wants to kiss him so bad. Then he remembers where he is, physically and in his life right now, realizes whom he’s surrounded by at this very second, and decides that he can.

So he does. It’s not unlike the way he kissed Cas when they rescued him from the Empty. Granted, there’s less sweat, blood, adrenaline. But just like that day, they’re both on the ground, and the gesture catches Cas by surprise. Just like that day, Dean pulls Cas in gently by the back of his neck and there’s no hesitance or fear. Just like that day, he just does it, presses their lips firmly together, and relishes in the taste of Castiel, in the feeling of the person he loves most in this world kissing him back.

The one big difference is this: that day marked the beginning of the rest of his life. Today? Today is just Dean’s first Pride.

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bitsandbobsofwriting · 4 years ago

Text

A rogue Druid’s “please join us” speech to Merlin triggers a few things:

Gwaine tries to commit regicide, Leon confronts his (understandable) fear of Dragons, and Merlin has a full on mental breakdown.

The knights are left to pick up the pieces and all of them consider following Gwaine’s lead.

ANGSTY ANGSTY

TW: Blood, death, nightmares. Physical and verbal abuse. A very brief implication of potential suicide/self harm.

Everyone notices the sudden changes within the group, it would be hard not to notice.

No one has any clue what happened though.

One day, everything is fine. If they think back, they realise Merlin had seemed a little... nervous? Maybe? But other than that, everything was fine, normal.

But the next day? From then until now, a month later? Everything was different.

Arthur seemed much angrier. He flew off the handle over the smallest mistakes, he worked the knights so hard in training that at least three of them had to go to Gaius for treatment everyday, and he didn’t seem like he planned on letting up any time soon. He snapped at everyone, even Gwen and Gaius, which was unheard of.

Merlin seemed... quieter. The knights, Gwen, and Gaius barely saw him, but when they did, he flinched at even the slightest noise; his eyes constantly darted around, looking for a way to escape, and he wouldn’t let anyone touch him.

They were worried, but Arthur was so constantly furious that no one dared bring it up with him, and the one time they tried to ask Merlin, he came up with some ridiculous excuse and ran away. They thought they had barely seen him before, but after that they didn’t see him at all for at least four days.

They also noticed how both of their worrying moods seemed ten times worse when they were with each other. Even just being in the same room, made Arthur angrier, and Merlin... they didn’t want to think it but... more scared.

After three weeks of this, they gathered together, and put into place their emergency plan. Leon would speak directly to Arthur, and Lancelot would speak directly to Merlin.

Of all of them, they were the most trusted by each target, and were the most likely to get answers, and the least likely to get a bad reaction if answers were refused.

They were... pretty wrong. Merlin reacted in the same way as he had to the group two and a half weeks ago. Which is odd, because he normally tells Lancelot everything, and not only did he not tell him, he lied and came up with excuses.

Leon was much worse for wear. He showed up a while after Lancelot, pale and miserable. Arthur had just yelled at him a bunch and assigned him extra patrols.

A few days later, they were all still struggling with what to do when Arthur informed them of a quest that was to be undertaken. They were... nervous, to say the least. Going on any sort of dangerous trip with Arthur in this state was bound to go badly, but they could hardly refuse, and they definitely couldn’t bring up the issue again.

So they resigned themselves to it. Gwen wished them luck, and made sure to give Merlin an extra tight hug before they left, and Gaius slipped a few extra medical supplies in each of the knights packs, just in case.

Apparently, patrols of Camelot Knights kept going missing. Whole groups of soldiers, in one very specific area near the border, were just not coming back.

Arthur could hardly justify sending more patrols out, so despite his foul mood, and his desperation to stay away from everyone, he took himself, his five best knights, and his manservant.

Elyan could’ve sworn he heard Arthur mutter something along the lines of “As if I’d leave you here unsupervised.”, to Merlin, the tone far less jesting that it might’ve been a month ago, but he kept it to himself. They were travelling and camping together, there would hardly be an opportunity to share without Arthur and Merlin there.

And like they were all expecting, the trip was hell.

Awkward silences that not even Gwaine could fill, Merlin looking close to tears the whole time, and Arthur constantly looking like he’s considering extreme violence.

Merlin even rides at the back of the group (unheard of), doesn’t complain even once about anything (even more unheard of), and the few times he does speak, he addresses all of them by their titles (down-right panic inducing).

They, of course, realise it had been a trap far too late, and before they even had time to shout and draw their swords, the camp fades around them.

When they wake an indiscernible amount of time later, they have been stripped of armour and weapons, and have been shackled.

They appear to be in a circular, one-room hut, the knights spaced equally and chained to the wall. Their cloaks remain, but any chainmail or armour they had been equipped with was gone, leaving them in the thin clothes they wore underneath, completely unprotected.

Merlin stood in the middle of the room, looking very confused. Once he noticed the knights stirring, he tried to take a step towards them, but frowned when he realised he couldn’t get within a arm’s reach of them.

Once the knights came around fully, they realised that whilst Merlin couldn’t move all that much, they couldn’t speak.

Arthur looks to Merlin with fury written all over his face, and pulls violently on his chains. Merlin flinches back and gasps out:

“This has nothing to do with me, I swear!”

Before the rest of the knights have time to change their expressions to one of confusion, a man walks through the door. Everyone’s gazes turn to him quickly, and they take in his appearance.

He looked like a Druid... but not quite right, like he hadn’t actually been to a camp in a while. He wore neutral colours, browns and greens, but despite his calm demeanour and gentle face, he looked a little crazed.

Where Druids stand calmly and walk softly, this man rushed in and fiddled with his hands, eyes darting around the room at everyone’s faces.

When Merlin goes to demand he introduce himself, the Druid holds a hand up, silencing him (no magic, just a gesture), and begins to speak:

“Who I am, does not matter. But I do know who you are, Emrys. I shall explain it your friends first, so they don’t get too lost.-”

The Druid smiles sadly, and turns to the knights, all of whom (apart from Lancelot) stare on in confusion at the melancholy resignation on the Druid’s face, and the dread on Merlin’s. Still unable to speak, and with very limited movement, they reluctantly resign themselves to listening to whatever speech the villain of the week had come up with.

“-Emrys has been being seen in prophetic visions for centuries. Whilst Uther Pendragon was destined to start the purge, Emrys, or as you know him: Merlin, is destined to stop it. He is said to be the most powerful Warlock to ever walk the earth, past present and future. He can bend the very elements of the world, bring down armies, turn cities to ash with a flick of his wrist. But destiny also foretold of The Once and Future King. Most have accepted that Arthur Pendragon, is said king.-”

Merlin was stiff but panicky during the Druid’s explanation, having realised that for whatever reason, he didn’t have access to his magic right now.

He could feel it buzzing under his skin, but every time he tried to pull it forward, it abandoned him, burrowing deep into his soul and hiding.

Merlin was tense and angry, angry that the chance to tell his friends the truth himself had been taken away, but his statue-like stillness is broken as he frowns and flinches slightly at the thinly veiled disgust in the sorcerer’s voice as he says Arthur’s name.

The Knights look confused, and very much shocked, their gazes flickering between the Druid and Merlin, but he refuses to meet their eyes.

“-Together, Emrys and the Forever King are destined to bring harmony and peace to the world, to restore magic’s place alongside the non magic, to inspire compassion, and stop the unjust genocide that Uther started.-”

Arthur and Leon shuffle uncomfortably at the mention of the late King and his sins, but are more focused on the other shocking revelations. The other knights (again, bar Lancelot, who is staring at Merlin apologetically) seem invested in the story, though they’re clearly confused.

Arthur was made aware of Merlin’s magic a few weeks ago, but despite Merlin’s choice to tell him willingly, he had reacted badly, and in his rage, hadn’t allowed Merlin to explain himself. The other knights were, of course, unaware of this, though they quickly put two and two together.

Despite Merlin’s best efforts, Arthur had stayed in the dark about the whole Emrys-prophecy-destiny thing.

The Druid gives each knight a short assessing gaze, seemingly to make sure they were paying attention.

He turns his attention back to Merlin, who is trying very hard to keep his expression blank (and failing) as he listens:

-”And how long have you waited, my friend, for Arthur to play his part in destiny. Ten years, of having the prophecies shoved down your throat by idealists, being told that you have no choice but to serve a man who would see your head on a spike should he know who you truly are. Ten years in the service of a man who has caused you nothing but pain, given you nothing but nightmares.-”

Merlin flinches and looks away. Every magic user in, or even near Camelot shares the same nightmares, all caused by the Pendragon Reign. There’s no need for a discussion about it, no need for a denial.

“-His father ripped your family apart. He himself stood at the grave of your best friend and told you he was evil, he himself killed the woman you loved-”

Arthur frowns in confusion at this. Merlin had never been in love. But he quickly doubts himself when he hears Merlin gasp quietly, and looks to him to see a tear slip down his cheek.

Fury flashes quickly across Lancelot’s face, obviously knowing the story, but he covers it quickly, and no one is the wiser to the anger slowly growing in his chest at what this so-called Druid was putting his friend through.

The Druid speaks his next words quietly, though still loud enough for everyone in the room to hear, as he lifts a soft hand and gently wipes away Merlin’s tear:

“-I know what you see when you close your eyes. I know why you are so exhausted. But do they? Have you told them?-”

The Druid nods his head in the direction of the knights, but doesn’t break eye contact with Merlin, who sniffles slightly before looking to the floor in shame.

“-Of the smoke and flames that you choke on when you sleep? You dream of pyres built just for you, built by the people you care most about. Even when you are awake, every second you have your eyes closed, every time you blink, you are forced to picture your so-called King with a sword at your throat, as if the scene were painted onto the back of your eyelids.-”

His voice had risen as he spoke and he had begun to pace, anger growing at the pain his Lord had gone through. He practically spits the word “King”, like just saying it disgusts him.

Merlin remains quiet, but he has a steady stream of tears down his face as he looks back at the Druid with despair. The knights watch on in anguish as they see the way he is suffering.

Arthur stops feeling angry and confused, and starts to feel a little guilty. Not that he would let it show; he stares on blankly.

Everyone wanted desperately to believe that the Druid was lying, manipulating them, that Merlin would deny it. But he didn’t. And that told them all they needed to know.

The Druid stopped his pacing, coming to a stand still in front of Merlin and cupping one of his cheeks softly with his hand. The knights pretend not to see Merlin lean into it slightly as his tears continue to fall.

The Druid begins again, speaking softly once more:

“-Were those fears unfounded? Were those nightmares irrational? I see the terror in your eyes. I see how petrified of your King you are.-”

Merlin lets out a shaky breath and glances quickly to Arthur, before looking back at the man in front of him.

The King is taken aback, and the knights are furious at the flash of fear on Merlin’s face when his gaze had momentarily met Arthur’s.

“-What did he do, when he found out? When you bared your soul and gave him nothing but honesty, and undeserved apologies. What did he do?-”

Merlin lets out his first audible sob, and the Knights pull at their chains slightly, desperate to comfort their friend. Arthur slumps back, remembering his actions as if they were mere hours ago.

One of Merlin’s hands lifted to cover his mouth as he chokes back a second sob, but the other lifts subconsciously to tug at the scarf around his neck.

The Druid lets a single tear escape his eye as he waves his hand gently, the scarf disappearing with the gentle golden glow of his eyes.

Merlin seems too distraught to notice; and moves both hands to clamp tightly over his mouth as tears stream down his face. His shoulders hunch, but not enough for any of the knights to miss what the Druid had clearly been trying to expose; a thin, barely healed scar along the base of his throat. As if a sword had been pressed there.

The Druid’s eyes lose focus slightly and he frowns as he ghosts a finger over the scar, seemingly asking the next question to himself:

“-Nightmares on the back of your eyelids, or visions of the future, hmm?-”

His eyes refocus, and he cards a hand through Merlin’s hair, trying to calm the man’s heartache as the knights stare on in horror.

Arthur resists the urge to look towards his knights, not wanting to see the disgusted glares he knows they’re sending his way.

The Druid pauses for a moment in his speech, waiting for Merlin to calm slightly before he quietly continued:

“-And what has he done since then? Has he allowed explanation? Has he seen the error of his ways and tried to understand? Or has he called you a liar, and a traitor. Has he called you a monster, whilst demanding that you continue to serve him?-”

Merlin’s breathing grows deeper as he struggles to control his sobs. He lowers his hands to be clenched at his sides, shaking, as the Druid softly places his hands on his shoulders.

His next words are spoken even quieter, though the knights can still hear him and the deadly anger that’s barely concealed in the man’s tone:

“-Has he laid hands on you, and called you a beast, while you cowered in fear, knowing that if you defended yourself he would see himself proven right?-”

Merlin let’s out loud, gasping sobs once more as the Druid’s hands travel softly down, from his shoulders to his wrists. There, he looks down, sorrow on his face as he carefully lifts Merlin’s sleeves, bunching them around his elbows.

The knights decide then and there they are going to protect Merlin no matter what, no matter from whom, as they each see the handprint shaped bruises littering Merlin’s arms.

“-He has hurt you, over and over and over-”

As he speaks, the Druid hovers his hands over the bruises, his eyes glowing softly golden as they heal.

“-And you despair, believing yourself worthless-”

Merlin flinches, and his sobbing grows more intense as his face is taken in soft hands.

“-waiting on a Golden Age that he refuses to bring. He is cruel, and unjust, how many more times must he hurt you? How many more of our people will the Pendragon line slaughter, out of misguided hatred? How much more sleep must you lose? How many more nightmares must you endure? You have stood loyally by his side for a decade, and had to stand and watch as he continued his father’s legacy, forced to believe it was destiny.-”

The Druid says “destiny” as if he hates the taste of the word in his mouth, the bloodshed of the past almost thirty years clearly having made him lose faith in the prophecies.

Merlin’s breathing has calmed slightly, and the knights aren’t sure whether to be relieved or frightened, as the Druid desperately continues, clutching Merlin’s hands in his own:

“-Too many lives have been lost, too much innocent blood spilt. Haven’t you yourself been forced to kill your own people to protect this False King from the consequences of his own actions?-”

The knights think too soon as Merlin’s breathing and sobs grow erratic once more. The manservant almost falls to the floor, his eyes clenched desperately shut, and only the Druids hands on his shoulders keeping him upright:

“-I was young, and naïve once. I too, believed in Arthur Pendragon, I believed in the prophecies, I believed he would a great king and a good man-”

He leans forward, pressing his forehead to Merlin’s as he gently says:

“-but he is not. He has failed you, and failed our people.-”

The Druid steps back, but still holds Merlin’s shoulder tightly as he gives him a pleading look.

The knights know what’s coming before it is said, and with the anguish and desperation and grief on their friend’s face? After they learned what their benevolent King had done? Well... they wouldn’t have blamed Merlin for saying yes.

“-I ask you to join me, Emrys. I know it’s difficult, to give up on a man you gave so much of yourself to, but there is too much Uther in him. It’s time, and you know this, to rewrite destiny. Dig your own path, liberate your own people, bring magic and compassion and harmony back to the world yourself.-”

Merlin, though distraught, still looks doubtful, and the knights hold their breath as the Druid continues, becoming more and more furious at their inability to speak.

All of them have tears in their eyes, if not falling already, even Arthur, though he has remained still and blank through the tears.

“-I know the flames you fear, the sword’s edge, the gallows’ drop, the axe’s fall. Do not let our kin continue to fear those things, do not stand by, waiting for the Pendragon tyrant to change, and allowing sacrifices to be made in the mean time.-”

Merlin’s sobbing begins again, and the Druid kisses him softly on the forehead before kneeling to the floor, gripping Merlin’s hands and looking up at him desperately:

"-You are Emrys, Lord of the Druids, and Conduit for all magic of this world. Not some servant that an entitled brat can toss around and treat lesser than the dirt he walks on. You are my King, our King. Not him.-”

He stands again and grips Merlin’s arms tightly, most likely leaving more bruises in place of the ones he had healed.

Merlin doesn’t notice the pain, but shakes his head stutteringly, still crying.

“-Do not let your people lose you to Arthur, as Arthur lost himself to Uther. To give up on him is painful, but the screams of your kin, burning for their gifts, echoing in your skull day and night?-”

The Druid’s hands move up to grip the sides of Merlin’s head, and he shakes him ever so slightly, his tone frantic and pleading:

“-That is worse. That is pain he will never understand, and certainly never care for. Join me, please my Lord I beg you, for our people.”

One of the Druid’s hands slides lower, to softly cup Merlin’s cheek again, but the other drops entirely.

The knights have never resented being magically gagged more than in this moment. They could do nothing but watch on in horror as the man summons a dagger behind his back.

The Druid is clearly waiting on his response, and Merlin is too distraught to notice the consequences of a wrong answer, tears flowing quickly down his face and ugly sobs forcing their way out of his throat.

Arthur watches in terror, knowing that this was his fault, that every shitty, selfish decision he had ever made had to led to this point. And the knights knew it too.

All they can do is pray to every deity they know the name of, that Arthur has done enough damage for Merlin to say yes. And oh, what a terrible thing to pray for.

The Druid softly strokes Merlin’s cheekbone with his thumb as the Warlock takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself. He looks up, meeting the gaze of the man opposite him before croaking:

“I... I can’t. Arthur is a good man, I have faith that he will-”

Before he can finish his sentence, the dagger is thrust up into his chest, his words stuttering to a stop and his red-rimmed eyes growing wide at the sudden, agonising pain spreading throughout his body.

Merlin is vaguely aware of the knights pulling roughly at their chains, but he pays them no mind as blood gurgles up his throat and he frowns, struggling to hear what the Druid was whispering in his ear:

“Then you have forsaken your people, and so I shall forsake you. Traitor.”

With that, Merlin is dropped roughly to the floor, dagger still imbedded in his chest as he lands on his side. Blood spills from both his mouth and the wound, eyes unfocused but heavy as the tears continue to overflow.

The knights are silently screaming, thrashing against their chains as their friend chokes, but Merlin ignores them in favour of smiling gently at the soft feeling of nothing, growing outwards from his chest.

He frowns once more, as though remembering something, and his eyes go glassy as two words escape from his mouth, barely a whisper:

“I’m... sorry...”

An apology to whom, no one knows, but with those last words his body goes completely still, the pool of blood still expanding beneath him, and his eyes unseeingly staring just to the left of The King.

No one in the room can tear their eyes from Merlin’s pale corpse, face now a mess of tears and blood.

The Druid looks down at him with an odd mix of contempt, and genuine sorrow. He had obviously waited long enough that his resentment of Arthur had bled into his feelings for his so-called saviour, but still grieved for what could have been.

The Knights look at him in horror, all understanding that they had never been lucky, they had just had Merlin. He had never asked for thanks, or recognition, or reward. He had kept them all safe, at great expense to himself, and now he was dead.

Lancelot seems the... calmest, though he still cries like the rest of them. He had, in theory, known of the pain Merlin was in, but had he known it was plaguing him to this extent... well perhaps he wouldn’t have been so loyal to Arthur.

Arthur himself stares at Merlin with nothing but terror and agonising grief. He had done this. If he had just let Merlin explain, if he had just given him five minutes, instead of bruises and nightmares and fear, then he would still be alive.

If he hadn’t been so selfish and cruel, perhaps hundreds of people, just like Merlin, just as scared and innocent as Merlin, would also be alive.

Merlin had spent his entire time in Camelot trying to convince Arthur that he wasn’t his father... and Arthur had gone and proven him wrong at every turn. And even then Merlin still had faith, still called him a good man.

The silencing spell still has hold over the knights, so they cry and scream and thrash soundlessly as the Druid finally rips his gaze from the body at his feet.

He steps carefully around Merlin to stand in front of Arthur. The sorrow clears from his face, leaving only contempt and rage left to be directed at the man in front of him. Arthur does not look up, keeping his tear stained face focused on the floor, even as the Druid begins to speak:

“You see what you have done, Arthur Pendragon? You think magic is the thing that corrupts, but it is not. It is you. Emrys was meant to be a saviour, a God, a guiding light to help our people to safety, but you tainted him, reduced him to nothing more than a sad, scared boy, and then reduced him further, to a corpse. My hands are clean of blood Pendragon, but yours?? Oh, yours are drenched in it.”

Arthur slowly lifts his distraught gaze to the Druid, but quickly widens his eyes at what he sees.

Merlin stands behind the Druid, eyes glowing golden, tears once more streaming down his face as he grips the handle of the dagger, still buried in his chest.

The bloodstains grow even larger as he grimaces slightly and pulls it free, before wordlessly forcing it through the Druid’s back.

The man lets out a sudden gasp, and looks down to see just the tip of the blade poking out where his heart should be. He gargles something, words that no one can make out, before Merlin pulls the dagger out again, and his body crumples to the floor.

The knights and Arthur can feel the silencing spell release them, but none of them make even a noise as they stare in shock at their tormented, but very much alive, friend.

Merlin drops the dagger from his hand and it lands with a splash in the mixing puddles of blood, before he himself falls harshly to his knees.

The others finally break out of their stupor, once again pulling towards their friend. Their cries and shouts of his name can be heard by everyone but him as he leans forward, placing his forehead against that of the lifeless Druid.

His cries grow erratic again as he whispers apology after apology, and every heart breaks even more at the sight before them.

They know why he apologises, they know why he grieves, even over a man who had tried to... had succeeded in killing him. The death of yet another of his own kind who was sick of waiting, who was rightfully angry, was not something to be celebrated.

They had thought, at the beginning of this, that they would get through whatever the Druid threw at them, they always did. But this, the brokenness of one of their dearest friends, was not something that looks fixable.

Merlin finally sits up again and he sobs louder, still deaf and blind to those around him. Lancelot has just enough time to yell at the others to cover their eyes, as a gut-wrenching scream escapes the Warlock.

They’re almost blinded, even with their eyes tightly shut and their arms thrown up. The scream is the loudest, and most anguished they’ve ever heard, and the force in which Merlin releases his magic completely eviscerates the hut they had been chained in.

Each of them is thrown violently backwards, and their chains crumble to the floor with the rest of the building as they try to find purchase on the ground. None of them are hurt too badly, and they’re grateful for the fact that even in this state, Merlin’s magic seems incapable of really causing them any damage.

The scream ends, and the knights look up to see Merlin sat in the middle of the crater he had created, staring blankly into the middle distance. Tears still stream down his face, but he doesn’t move and he makes no sound, just kneels there with his blood soaked hands on his lap, palms towards the sky.

It takes a few moments for the knights to regain their senses, but once they do, all hell breaks loose.

Gwaine immediately gets to his feet and makes a rush towards Arthur, fully intending on throttling him, screaming obscenities as he went, but Percival and Elyan jump forward, grabbing an arm each and dragging him away as he curses the King and the Sky and the Gods.

As much as Percival and Elyan were not impartial to killing Arthur right now, Merlin was the priority, and as much as he may have deserved it, Merlin would never forgive them if they hurt the King.

Arthur seems to be unaware of the attempt on his life made by one of his most trusted knights, and just stares blankly at an equally blank Merlin.

Lancelot and Leon make a bee-line for the Warlock, but stop just short of touching him, not knowing how he would react.

Leon nods gently at Lancelot, clearly having picked up that this knight had already known at least part of the story. Lancelot returns his nod, before moving forward slowly. The body of the Druid lays untouched at Merlin’s knees, and the knight removes his cloak, laying it over him, before reaching a slow hand towards Merlin’s shoulder.

He finally makes contact after a little hesitation, whispering his name as gently and as comfortingly as he is able with tears still leaking from his eyes.

Merlin doesn’t react at all to Lancelot’s touch, not even when he takes his bloody hand, or shakes his shoulder slightly; just sits and stares and cries.

Leon gulps before reaching forward himself. He grabs the dagger from besides Merlin and tosses it behind him (he didn’t like to think about that action too much. He has no idea what state his friend is in right now, best to not have any sharp instruments within his reach when he came to.) before lifting his hand to wipe away the man’s tears.

Arthur stares upon all of this in horror from his position sprawled on the floor a few metres away.

Elyan and Percival have just about managed to calm Gwaine, and they begin making their way to Leon, Lancelot, and Merlin, but before they get even halfway there, Arthur finally speaks.

His voice breaks, and is barely audible, but everyone hears him nonetheless as he murmurs:

“I did this...”

Gwaine makes another run at him, regaining his anger, and Percival and Elyan just about manage to grab him before he commits regicide.

Lancelot and Leon look up at him sharply, but when Lancelot lowers his gaze and continues to try and rouse Merlin, Leon holds the King’s gaze, and says strongly:

“Yes. Yes you did, My Lord.”

Arthur’s face crumbles even more, and Leon glares at him with venom for a few more seconds, before giving Lancelot a soft pat on the back, and walking towards the other three.

He mumbles a few harsh things that only Gwaine can hear, who responds at first with more anger, but then resignation. The First Knight gives the man a pat on the back and nods knowingly at Elyan and Percival. No one, not even Gwaine, pretends to miss the meaning of “be ready to catch him again” in the gesture.

Arthur stays in his position on the floor as the four of them walk softly towards Merlin and Lancelot, but before they get there, everyone’s gazes are drawn to the shadow in the sky, getting closer and closer.

It moves with an alarming place, and their anger at Arthur is momentarily forgotten as he scrambles up and screams:

“DRAGON!!”

Gwaine, Elyan, Percival and Arthur rush forward to stand between the beast and the other three. They have no armour or weapons, but like hell were they just going to let it get to them.

Lancelot looks up to see the white, horse sized beast land heavily in front of The King, his eyes widen and he jumps up, rushing forward to push between the others.

Leon moves to hold a still unresponsive Merlin behind his back protectively, but frowns in confusion when Lancelot yells at Arthur (who had been about to run at the beast):

“NO! No don’t hurt her! She’s Merlin’s, don’t hurt her!”

Everyone looks at him in confusion and fear as he slowly approaches the Dragon, she had been growling lowly at first, but seemed to perk up when she saw Lancelot.

Lancelot gives her a small smile, and holds his hand out, allowing her to come to him, before quietly saying:

“I’ve never been more glad to see you, Aithusa. Merlin is over here.”

He turns back towards the others, and calmly, but forcefully says:

“Move. She needs to see him.”

Gwaine nods after a moment, trusting Lancelot, and moves out of the way. Arthur goes to argue, but Elyan and Percival roughly shove him to the side, clearing a path to Merlin and Leon for Lancelot and the new, slightly terrifying, arrival.

Leon looks up fearfully, still in front of Merlin protectively. He stares at the Dragon for a few moments, breathing deeply, before looking up at Lancelot. Lancelot gives him a weak smile, and a nod before saying quietly:

“He’s a Dragon-Lord. She can help him, it’s ok.”

Leon gulps, before nodding, and stepping out of the way. He doesn’t move too far, obviously still affected by his last encounter with a Dragon, and watches with unconcealed suspicion as Aithusa prances around Lancelot at his nod.

The others crowd closer as well, looking on in confusion, awe, suspicion, as Aithusa slowly approaches Merlin.

She lays down at his side, gently pressing her head onto Merlin’s hands, still in his lap. Her mouth opens and Leon gasps as she blows a gentle mist up into his face. Merlin’s back straightens and the knights can see his eyes come back into focus as he blinks.

They all stare with bated breath as he gulps, and begins to notice his surroundings; looking in fear at the crater around him.

Merlin is broken from his growing panic as Aithusa chirps softly from his lap, and his head whips down, only now noticing her.

The knights let out a collective breath as he smiles, very slightly and very briefly, but still; after what they had just seen him go through they would take anything. He leans his head down, and wraps his arms around the creature. She chirps once again, louder this time, as she uses her tail to push away the forgotten Druid’s corpse.

She curls her body around Merlin protectively, and he collapses even further into the semi-embrace she’s giving him. The knights smile slightly, relieved that Merlin seems responsive, and safe, before they take slow steps towards the two of them.

She whips her head up quickly and growls at them, digging her front claws into the ground. They take in sudden breaths and stop moving, wary, but she stops growling when she looks to Lancelot.

The others stare on in shock and confusion as she tilts her head slightly, and Lancelot nods as he quietly says:

“They’re friends, it’s ok.”

The creature seems to nod, and the others follow behind Lancelot as he begins moving towards Merlin again.

He crouches down, and gives Aithusa a well-received scratch on the chin, before he gently places a hand between Merlin’s shoulder-blades.

Percival, Elyan, Gwaine, and finally Leon follow suit, sitting carefully next to the Dragon, but unlike Lancelot, they don’t touch her, or Merlin. She may seem safe and loving and on their side, but she was still a Dragon.

Arthur moves a little slower, not sure if he’s welcome (he’s not) but when he gets within five feet of the group huddled on the floor, Aithusa lifts her head and growls again.

Elyan and Percival are shocked at the sudden movement, but Gwaine smirks, and Leon nods his head approvingly (though he’s still understandably... nervous). Lancelot looks back at a shocked and still tear-stricken Arthur, and speaks. His voice is quiet, but his tone is vicious:

“They have a mental link; she sees what he sees. It might be best, Your Majesty, for you to stay away.”

He doesn’t bother to watch Arthur’s reaction; he turns back and begins carding a soft hand through Merlin’s hair. He flinches only slightly before relaxing under the soft ministrations, and Aithusa gives Lancelot an affectionate lick on the arm.

The other knights do see the way that Arthur flinches, before he gives a shaky nod and takes a few steps back. He goes to say something, but the tears in his eyes overflow, and he turns to walk away.

Gwaine’s smirk grows slightly before he drops it entirely and turns back to the others, no longer caring what Arthur got up to. He is the first of the knights, other than Lancelot, to be brave enough to reach a hand forward and stroke Aithusa gently.

Elyan and Percival hesitatingly follow his lead, and Aithusa chirps happily at the attention. Leon’s gaze follows Arthur as he walks towards the horses.

They were far away, well out of the way of Merlin’s blast, but even with the distance Leon could see they were shaken. Thankfully they had been tied to the trees, otherwise he’s certain they would have bolted.

Leon finds it only slightly surprising that he feels no sympathy for the King. There’s only so much you can forgive a man for. When Arthur finally reaches the horses and begins untacking them, he looks away, back to Aithusa and Merlin.

Everyone can tell that Camelot’s First Knight is still rather shaken at the presence of the Dragon, but when Merlin looks up slightly to see him still sat there, unwilling to leave him, his heart swells a little.

Leon meets his gaze and gulps, but returns Merlin’s shaky smile.

The other knights smile as well, glad that Merlin was feeling at least a little better, and Percival speaks quietly, not wanting to spook him (or the Dragon):

“Hey, there’s our lucky charm.”

The other knights give him questioning looks but Merlin just chuckles slightly, before sitting up properly, and focusing his attention on running his fingers over Aithusa’s scales, picking out grass and mud.

Percival looks indignant before replying, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world:

“What? You honestly thought that tree branches only fell if there was a fight happening, and then only fell on the enemies?? The rock-falls? The fires even when it was pouring with rain?? The miraculous solutions to end-of-the-world type problems?? Come on, guys.”

The others look taken aback at that, but Lancelot just smiles knowingly. They all look to Merlin, who has managed to wipe the blood from his face with his sleeve, and he just shrugs slightly.

The rest of them, bar Leon, let out small huffs of laughter, and continue to stroke Aithusa, knowing that Merlin almost certainly isn’t ready for an actual conversation yet.

Merlin looks at Leon’s pale form assessingly, before a look of realisation crosses his face. The knight is tense, and staring at Aithusa’s sharp teeth with worry, but his gaze is quickly drawn to Merlin when he reaches a shaky hand towards him.

Merlin gives him an understanding smile, and crooks his fingers, encouraging the curly-haired knight to take his hand. Leon does so, and his breath hitches as Merlin lowers their intertwined hand to rest on the top of Aithusa’s head.

Leon lets out a slow breath as he feels Elyan’s supportive hand on his back, but relaxes fully when he sees the sparkle in Merlin’s eyes. Anything to make their Warlock happy in this moment. And forever, probably.

Gwaine looks at Leon out of the corner of his eye, and says lowly:

“I’m fairly certain I’m going to try and kill him if I look at him again, so what’s the King up to?”

Merlin tenses slightly, but Leon squeezes his hand and he relaxes again. Lancelot raises and eyebrow and before Leon can reply, he says:

“What, no princess?”

Gwaine narrows his eyes before gruffly saying:

“Princess was an affectionate nickname, and I’m not feeling all that affectionate towards him right now.”

The others nod knowingly, turning their attention back to Merlin and Aithusa. Leon leaves his hand in Merlin’s, but looks at Gwaine before saying lowly:

“He went to deal with the horses. Now we know we no longer need a quick get-away, they need untacking and feeding and watering. They were pretty spooked by... they were pretty spooked.”

Leon looks back at Merlin when his hand gets squeezed, to see him frowning slightly. Leon catches his eye and gives him a small smile, but Merlin just gets teary-eyed again, before sniffing and muttering:

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to I just... I’m sorry.”

Only a single tear has time to fall before Lancelot has his hand on Merlin’s shoulder again (comfortingly), and Elyan has his hand on Gwaine’s shoulder (forcefully). Leon shakes his head softly, and responds in a gentle voice:

“You don’t have anything to apologise for Merlin, we are the ones who should be sorry, for not being able to protect you.”

Merlin’s frown deepens, and he goes to retort, but Gwaine beats him to it, obviously trying to keep the anger out of his voice:

“From the so-called Druid and from him. We should have done better.”

Leon can feel Merlin’s hand begin to shake, so he squeezes it once more as Merlin shakes his head and speaks, his voice sounding stronger already:

“It’s not his fault. He was just shaken and scared and I should have-”

Gwaine clenches his jaw, struggling to keep control of his rage, but Elyan grips his shoulder tighter in warning, and replies in his stead, interrupting Merlin:

“There’s no excuse Merlin. All of us have been attacked by magic, but equally, all of us have been attacked by swords. I mean look at Leon, giving Dragons a second chance after what happened. I would perhaps understand brief anger, but there is no way to justify laying his hands on you in such a way that leaves bruises, and certainly no justification for putting a blade to your throat.”

Merlin frowns, and looks like he wants to argue, but once again, a knight beats him to it, Lancelot this time:

“No, Merls. We know how much he means to you. But what he did was wrong, there’s no rationalisation. We all know that you’ve already forgiven him, and that’s why we can’t yet. Probably not for a while.”

Merlin sighs, looking pained, and Leon uses his other hand to tilt his chin up:

“Not to say that we won’t ever forgive him. But someone has to be angry at him for what he’s done, and Lord knows you aren’t gonna do it. Consider us your stand-ins.”

Merlin smiles slightly, and Leon considers that a win, returning the smile and nodding slightly to himself, before looking back down at the Dragon, now seemingly asleep, and purring, on Merlin’s lap.

Elyan releases the death grip on Gwaine’s shoulder, when the now much calmer knight, with a smile on his face, says:

“So... you have a Dragon??”

Merlin chuckles fondly, before looking to him and saying quietly:

“Yeah. Her name is Aithusa. I’m surprised she came alone, Kilgharrah usually doesn’t like it when she runs off.”

Lancelot winces slightly as the other knights look shocked, before Percival says:

“Kil-what-now? There’s another one??”

Merlin grimaces slightly, before looking to Leon worriedly and tightening the grip on his hand:

“Uhh... yeah. Kilgharrah is the name of the Dragon that... attacked Camelot a few years ago.-”

Leon straightens his back and gulps, but doesn’t remove his hand from Merlin’s, nodding at him to continue:

“-I didn’t have control over him until right at the end. I told him to leave and never come back, unless I called him-”

Lancelot makes a noise of realisation as he nods, and interrupts Merlin:

“That’s probably why Aithusa came alone. You didn’t call for her, and technically we’re still within Camelot’s borders. He couldn’t come even if he wanted to. Poor sod is probably clomping around at the edge of the border freaking out.”

Merlin looks to Lancelot and nods, satisfied to feel Leon relax a bit, before looking back to the First Knight apologetically:

“-He does feel really bad at that. He just wanted to get back at Uther for the whole... genocide thing I guess. But that’s no excuse. I just didn’t want to be the one to be responsible for killing the last Dragon, even if Kilgharrah personally might’ve deserved it at the time. That was all before Aithusa came along.”

Everyone nods in understanding, before focussing their attention back on Aithusa. She really was like a giant puppy, even if they had to be wary to avoid her claws as she twitched in her sleep.

Merlin sighs, looking forlorn once again as he realises how exhausted he is, knowing that they’re going to have to get up and make camp at some point.

He can cope with an awkward, tense silence between him and Arthur easily enough, that’s what the last few weeks had consisted of. But an awkward and tense silence between everyone? Elyan and Percival inwardly fuming? Gwaine outwardly fuming? Leon and Lancelot being all protective? He’s not sure he can deal with that.

At Merlin’s sigh, Lancelot tilts his head to catch his eye. His brow creases as he says softly:

“What is it, Merls?”

Merlin looks up, still squeezing Leon’s hand, before quietly replying:

“Nothing, I’m just tired. We have to re-make camp at some point and I’m not sure if I can deal with everyone being so...”

He waves his free hand around loosely, and Lancelot huffs out a laugh, before kicking Gwaine, getting everyone’s attention:

“We have to go make camp. But Merlin is exhausted, and doesn’t want to deal with any of this shit tonight, so we’re all going to have to play nice for the time being.”

Gwaine growls, and quickly retorts:

“Like hell am I gonna treat him with-”

Lancelot kicks him again, harder this time, and Elyan replaces the harsh hand on his shoulder before forcefully saying:

“Right now, it doesn’t matter what Arthur deserves. Merlin needs peace and quiet, and that’s what we’re going to give him.”

Gwaine grumbles, but begrudgingly nods, and Merlin gives him a grateful smile.

The knights all stand up, and Merlin shakes Aithusa awake, giving a small chuckle when she stretches like a cat.

Once she takes her weight off of his lap, Merlin follows the knights to stand, almost falling over at the weakness in his legs. Leon and Lancelot catch an arm each, steadying him as he shuts his eyes tightly, willing the dizziness away.

He feels a hand wipe the hair from his forehead, and opens his eyes slowly to see Percival checking him over with an assessing gaze:

“I’m fine, just tired, a little dizzy.”

Lancelot nods in understanding, humming slightly:

“Hmm. I’m not surprised, you haven’t done anything this big in a while, and I doubt you’ve slept well in the last few weeks.”

Merlin gives him a sheepish look as he shakes his head, but it’s Elyan’s questioning gaze that Lancelot responds to:

“I found out by accident when I first met him. Our Warlock isn’t very good at keeping secrets.”

He says it with a small smirk as he looks back down to Merlin, who’s looking indignant:

“Hey! I managed to keep everyone else from finding out.”

Gwaine looks guilty as he raises his arm quietly:

“Actually uh... I knew. I mean not about the whole Emrys, prophecy thing. But the magic stuff, yeah.”

Merlin looks at him, shocked. The other knights share his expression for just a moment before they laugh at the look on Merlin’s face:

“How?!”

Gwaine puts his arm down and laughs again:

“Mate... we met in the middle of a tavern fight, in which shit started literally flying about the moment you joined in.-”

He shrugged, before casually continuing:

“-I figured you would tell me when you wanted to. Until then, it wasn’t my secret to know. You also have me to thank for backing you up every time The Prick asked if I saw you at the tavern.”

Merlin laughed and nodded his thanks, before looking over to where said Prick was setting up camp, a few metres beyond the edge of the crater.

His face fell slightly and the others follow his gaze, tensing slightly in anger when they saw what he was looking at. Merlin takes his arms from Leon and Lancelot, finally feeling steady on his feet, before quietly saying:

“Come on, we might as well get this over with. I’m starving, and tired, and Aithusa will get bored if we don’t start entertaining her.”

Everyone turns around to see Aithusa (now she was sure that her Lord was ok), prancing about in the crater; chasing birds and digging holes.

Merlin raises an eyebrow and everyone else chuckles slightly. Gwaine pushes Lancelot out of the way and takes Merlin’s hand, beginning to walk determinedly towards camp. Everyone catches up quickly, Leon taking Merlin’s other hand when the man had reached out to grab his cape.

Gwaine looks down at Merlin, seeing how nervous he is, and says:

“So. How long until she’s big enough to be ridden? I want you to take me flying, Merlin.”

Merlin chuckles, and looks back to see Aithusa happily trailing them:

“Not for a while. Dragons grow slow, so it’ll be another few years at least. Plus she’s got some issues with bone growth that we’re still trying to fix. She’ll be fine in the long run, but her development is taking a lot longer than normal. She still can’t speak.”

Everyone stops at that, and Merlin’s arms get yanked back when he continued walking. He turns to see Leon giving him an incredulous look:

“Dragons can speak?!”

Merlin tilts his head in confusion, before laughing and tugging them forwards again:

“Yeah. I forget that Uther basically erased all knowledge on Dragons, but they’re just as intelligent as we are. Kilgharrah would like to think that they’re more intelligent, but he’s always been a cryptic, egotistical bastard.-”

The others follow his pace and nod, but the mood darkens as they almost reach the camp. Merlin continues faintly, but quickly:

“I’ll tell you everything I know when... when we get back.”

Leon squeezes his hand, knowing that he was about to say “if”, assuring him that “when” is the right word.

Arthur looks up at the group and gulps from his place next to the fire. He straightens up, the anxiety showing clearly on his face, but before anyone can say anything, Aithusa jumps in between him.

He falls back at the sudden movement and she begins to growl; he widens his eyes as she stalks slowly towards him.

Gwaine smirks again, the others managing to keep their faces blank, but Merlin looks shocked, before he jumps forward and puts a hand on the Dragon’s back:

“Aithusa no. He’s a... friend. It’s ok, he’s-”

Arthur jumps to his feet and interrupts him:

“No, no it’s fine. I’ll... go... sit over there.”

He gestures behind him, and walks quickly away from the fire, sitting just within the fire’s light, the evening dimming around them.

Aithusa tilts her head, snaps her jaws at him once more before completely changing disposition. She begins bouncing around the fire, chirping happily and playfully trying to catch floating embers in her claws.

Merlin smiles slightly and the other knights (bar Gwaine, who is glaring very pointedly at Arthur) chuckle at her antics, before they all sit in a semi circle on the opposite side of the fire to Arthur, Merlin in the middle.

The Warlock is once again wedged protectively between Leon and Gwaine, and he fiddles softly with Leon’s cape in his lap as he stares fondly at Aithusa.

Elyan moves to the packs, unloading food and water and cooking pots. Merlin gets up to help, but Gwaine pulls him back down by the hand and holds on firmly as he says:

“You’ve been through enough. We can put up with Elyan’s shitty cooking for a couple nights.”

Merlin tries to pull away with a “But I can-” but Leon grabs his other hand, holding him down and interrupting:

“Absolutely not. You said yourself that you’re tired. If Elyan needs help, he can ask one of us.”

Merlin huffs sulkily and Leon laughs, stroking the back of his hand protectively.

Leon had known Merlin just as long as Arthur had, and whilst they had virtually nothing to do with each other the first few years, they were still friendly acquaintances, even then. Leon knew full well that it was Merlin who would have a hot meal left in his room after a late patrol, and Merlin always appreciated how Leon kept as many weapons in the armoury in as good nick as possible, so Merlin didn’t have to deal with it.

Besides, even before they knew each other’s names, Leon always found Merlin’s reactions to Arthur’s stupidity funny. He could hardly say it out loud, being the Perfect Knight and all, but he always thought it was a good thing that Arthur had someone at his side keeping him humble, and calling him out in ways no one else would.

Of course they had gotten much closer over the years, as did all of the knights, thanks to Merlin. Currently, Leon was feeling just a tinge of regret at being so grateful for Merlin’s presence at Arthur’s side; he had never really thought about how difficult being that man’s babysitter would be, especially now he knew Merlin had magic. And some sort of destiny.

Time passes fairly quickly whilst Elyan cooks, the others taking to heart what Lancelot had said and trying to keep a quiet, but easy conversation going.

They ask Merlin various questions about Aithusa, Kilgharrah, the Druids, the weird name that he had been called. He answered them all easily enough, but they notice the way he hesitates when they ask about his magic specifically or the prophecies, so they steer clear of those topics.

They’ll definitely want to know the whole story eventually, and they’re practically buzzing with desperation to ask Merlin to show them something magical, but they know that now is not the time.

Dinner is finally served, and despite Gwaine’s statement, it wasn’t actually that bad. Mainly because every time Elyan went to add something to the pot, he would look back desperately at Merlin, and took into account the shakes and nods of his head with a grateful smile.

He did struggle to cover the scowl on his face when he delivered Arthur’s bowl to him, replying to The King’s quiet “thank you, Elyan” with an even quieter “don’t mention it” .

Dinner was eaten quickly and in silence. They hadn’t been unconscious for long, and hour or two at most, but they had all worked up an understandable appetite, Merlin especially. He would never ask for seconds, but knowing that, Elyan gave him an extra big serving without a word.

They entertained themselves after dinner by throwing the last scraps of meat to Aithusa, watching her jump and flip and fly about the camp. Merlin had objected at first, but gave in when he saw the small grin on Leon’s face, and heard the way the others were laughing. The City was only a few days ride away, they could always hunt on the way back.

It didn’t take long for her to tire out and curl up at Merlin’s feet to sleep. Like Merlin had mentioned, Aithusa was developing slowly, and she normally couldn’t fly very far; it must’ve taken a huge amount of energy and effort for her to get all the way here. But like the Knights, she was very protective, and there was no way she could not check on her Lord, after she and Kilgharrah had felt the anguish he was in.

As Kilgharrah once again crosses Merlin’s mind, he sighs, and makes mental note to call him in the morning, when he had more energy.

Merlin is distracted from his thoughts when the camp goes silent all of a sudden, and Gwaine reaches over to squeeze his hand. He looks up in worry, to see that Arthur had stood, and walked a little closer, though he made sure to stay the other side of the fire.

Merlin tenses slightly. He tries not to let it show, but he can knows that he failed when he feels Leon’s hand firmly in the middle of his back. Hidden from the others, but a silent reassurance.

Arthur gulps, obviously nervous, but he meets Merlin’s gaze, flinching at the slight fear in his eyes:

“Merlin, I know nothing I say will-”

He’s interrupted by Gwaine growling and standing suddenly, stepping in front of Merlin protectively, but it’s Lancelot’s harsh words that cut him off fully:

“Not tonight, Arthur. We’re all tired and angry so just... not tonight.”

Arthur clenches his jaw, and blinks away tears before nodding:

“Yes, I... I understand.”

With that, he sniffles slightly before taking a step back. He looks to the floor as he mumbles something about checking the perimeter, before slowly walking away from the camp, into the night.

Merlin lets out a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding, and relaxes slightly as Leon runs his hand over his back. Gwaine stares after Arthur for a few moments, deliberating on whether or not to follow him (and presumably, kick his ass). Merlin reaching up to take his hand and pull him back down makes his mind up, and he settles back into his seat, Merlin’s small hand clasped between his two larger ones.

Percival speaking up breaks the tense silence:

“It’s late and Lance is right, we’re all tired. If we want to make quick work of the journey home, and have time to hunt, then we should get some sleep.”

Murmurs of agreement float up around the group, and Gwaine, voice still tense and angry, says:

“I’ll take first-”

But he’s quickly interrupted by Elyan, softly laughing:

“Absolutely not, Gwaine. If you’re left alone we’ll all wake to find the King dead in the morning.”

Gwaine raises a challenging eyebrow, not denying anything, and Elyan huffs, Percival muttering:

“Fine. But I’m taking it with you so you don’t get a chance to smother him.”

Gwaine gives a sarcastic looking smile, before ruffling Merlin’s hair fondly and walking towards the fire. He adds another log, grabs his bedroll, and settles down against a tree, Percival sitting at his side.

Everyone else gathers their rolls, and whilst normally they spread out, they all seem rather desperate to stay as close to Merlin as possible.

Normally he would complain, they all snore, and Merlin is definitely expecting nightmares tonight, but he can’t find it in himself to send them away, and to be perfectly honest, he's certain that they would just move back the moment he closed his eyes anyway.

The Warlock finds himself tucked under Lancelot’s arm, with Leon a respectful distance away on his other side, though still within arm’s reach. Elyan settles somewhere below his feet, and for the first time in weeks, Merlin finds himself fully relaxed.

Aithusa sleepily moves from her spot by Merlin’s feet, to curl up with Gwaine and Percival, and Merlin smiles at the thought that she not only trusts his friends in general, but trusts them enough to leave Merlin in their care. Dragons are protective and possessive creatures, and that trust speaks volumes.

Merlin is still a little miserable, and he almost resents himself for still being scared of Arthur despite his obvious regret, but... with all that happened... well. You can’t really blame him.

He’s got a gaggle of very protective knights around him, one of which he can vaguely hear trying to persuade another to commit regicide when no one was looking.

He has time to huff out a small laugh as Lancelot pulls him closer, before he drifts off; much quicker than he thought he would. He was comforted by the warmth behind him, the presence at his feet, the guardians watching over him, and the hand reaching towards him in the dark, just about close enough to lay fingers over Merlin’s heartbeat.

No nightmares plague him that night, and he doesn’t even wake to the warning growls sent Arthur’s way when he eventually returned to camp.

The next few days, hell, the next few months would probably be difficult, but he finds himself not as anxious now he knows he won’t have to face it alone.

THE END

I don’t think I’ll write a part two to this, but if someone wants to extend it, feel free, same as normal: credit and tag me :)

I’ve had the whole speech written out in full in my phone notes for like two months, but only recently got round to actually turning it into anything. I hope ya’ll enjoyed it!! I wanted to write something hella angsty so....

I’m fairly certain whatever I write next will be the dead opposite of this (FLUFF fluff) but honestly who knows.

Let me know if there’s anything specific you want my thoughts on :)

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little-fam-ily · 3 years ago

Text

Build a Bear (Sanders Sides Agere Oneshot)

Read it on ao3

Rating: G

Word Count: 4,079

Characters: CG Logan and Patton, Agere Virgil

Pairings: Queerplatonic Analogical, platonic Analogicality

Warnings: Kink mention

Summary: In which Logan and Virgil take a trip to Build a Bear (brought to you by a Build a Bear employee).

Virgil’s eyes widened as he stared at the commercial on the TV. It was for Build a Bear, talking about how you can put different sounds in ‘your new furry friends’. He smiled around his pacifier. “Lolo!” He called to Logan, his caregiver.

Logan popped his head in from the kitchen, “What is it?”

Virgil pointed to the TV. Logan was able to catch just the end of the ad. “Virgil, I don’t think-” He stopped himself as he looked at Virgil’s wide, pleading eyes. “Oh, oh Virgil, don’t,” He sighed, “You know what the puppy eyes do to me.”

Virgil just let out a whine. Logan looked at him sternly, “You know they’re very expensive, Virgil.”

He nodded, “I know…” He glanced away, cheeks red. Logan shook his head, thinking about it, “Well, it’s almost your birthday anyway, We’ll make a day of it.”

Virgil smiled wide, “Weally?”

Logan nodded, “Really really.”

Virgil jumped up and embraced him in a hug, squeezing tight, “T’ank you, Lolo!”

Soon the day came, and Virgil and Logan sat in the car, getting ready to go into the mall. Virgil was sucking his thumb, and Logan was looking at him with concern, “Do you think you can be big enough to pass?”

Virgil glanced at him, cheeks turning pink. He dragged his thumb out of his mouth, stopping at the tip where he could still bite down.

Logan sighed, “Better.” He paused before he spoke up again, “Virgil, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. You don’t have to hide it if you don’t want to.”

Virgil whined, “I jus’, don’ wan’ people t’inking i’s kink.” He murmured around his thumb.

Logan nodded, “That’s understandable. But what we do is none of their business. I’m pretty sure the average person doesn’t care, and if they do, then they’re not a good person.”

Virgil glanced away. Logan let out a sympathetic breath, “Well, if you’re ready I’m ready.”

Virgil nodded. Logan stepped out of the car, then helped Virgil out of the car. They walked into the mall holding hands.

The line to Build a Bear was already a mile long. They got in, and Virgil was ancy with anticipation. The wait seemed like hours. Logan could tell he was getting impatient, so he squeezed his hand. They smiled at each other.

Finally they got to the door. They were greeted by a young woman with long brown hair and a wide smile. Her name tag read Valerie.

“Hey there! What brings you to the workshop today?” She smiled. Virgil panicked, looking to Logan for help.

“It’s his birthday next week, but I thought I’d take him early.” Logan turned to her. Her smile grew wider, “Wow, that’s great!” She got out a sharpie and a pack of stickers from her apron, “How old are you turning, sweetheart?”

Virgil took a deep breath, preparing himself to answer, “Twenty.”

“And your name?”

“V-” He started, but stopped himself, having to pause for another moment, “Virgil.”

She wrote everything down, tearing the sticker off and handing it to him, “And have you built a bear with us before?”

Logan and Virgil glanced at each other, then back to her, shaking their heads.

Valerie kept her smile, “So to your left is the wall where we have our whole selection of bears to choose from. Once you pick your new friend you’ll head over to the sound station to pick any scents or sounds that you’d like.

“Then you’ll come around over to that blue square where we’ll stuff your friend and perform the heart ceremony. After we get them stitched up you’ll go to the back wall to get their clothing and accessories, head to Station 4 to give them a name, and then you’ll be all ready to check out and take your new friend home!”

Virgil’s breathing became shallow. That was a lot to keep track of. Logan sensed his anxiety, squeezing his hand, “Ready to head on in?”

He looked at him, hesitantly nodding his head. Valerie opened the rope barrier and stepped aside, gesturing for them to enter.

They stepped in, and Virgil was already overwhelmed by the large selection of stuffed animals. There were more than bears, there were rabbits and cats and monkeys and unicorns. There were themed bears too, like Frozen and Star Wars and Paw Patrol.

Virgil’s eyes scanned the wall, biting down on his thumb hard. Logan stepped up to him, “I know it’s a lot to think about, and there are a lot of steps, but I remember all of it, and I will be with you every step of the way.”

Virgil nodded, then his eyes widened as they settled on a fluffy brown bear with the Harry Potter logo printed on its back paw. He pointed to it, “Harry Potter bear.”

Logan smirked, “You want that one? We can put some Ravenclaw accessories on it.”

Virgil smiled wide, nodding. He grabbed the unstuffed pelt and felt the fur, holding it close to his chest.

Logan smiled at his little, then noticed the birthday sticker still in his hand. “Here, let me help you with that,” He took the sticker, peeled it off the back, and stuck it right on Virgil’s jacket, “There we go.”

Virgil smiled at him, leaning on his chest. They stayed like that for a bit, then a young man with an apron walked up to them with a smile, “Have we picked our new friend?”

Virgil looked at Logan, then at the man, who’s name tag read Terrence, nodding.

“Alright! Right this way,” Terrence beckoned them over to a white counter with computers on each end. He reached for Virgil’s bear, “Can I see him real quick?”

Virgil glanced at Logan, then hesitantly handed over the pelt. Terrence pulled a sharpie out of his apron and started writing on the tag, “I see your name is Virgil, is that right?”

Virgil nodded. Terrence put the sharpie away, “And I can also see it’s your birthday! Well, have a very happy birthday,” He smiled, then continued, “Now, we have some scents you can choose from. We have strawberry, birthday cake, cotton candy, and bubblegum.”

Both Virgil and Logan took some time smelling the scents. “Strawberry,” Virgil decided.

“Alright!” Terrence got out his sharpie and wrote some things down on the tag, then took an unopened scent packet, peeled a sticker off, then stuck the sticker on the tag. The scent was a plastic disk shaped like a bear head.

“Now we get to pick a sound we put in the paw of the bear right here.” He showed them the right paw, which had a little heart shaped patch on it.

Virgil smiled. This was the part he was the most excited for.

Terrence moved to one of the computer monitors, “Here is the sound station, we have a huge selection of sounds to choose from. You can scroll up and down as well as side to side. There are generic animal sounds, themed sounds from movies and TV. I see you picked a Harry Potter bear, maybe you’d like a Harry Potter sound?”

Virgil thought about it, scrolling through the Harry Potter selection. He looked, but decided it would be best to just pick the theme from the movie.

He pressed the icon, jumping at the loud noise coming from the computer. Logan grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight, rubbing the back of his hand with his thumb.

“Alright, I’m just gonna scan his tag really quick.” Terrence moved the tag under the scanner. “Now you’re going to grab one of those chips,” He pointed to a hole in the counter which housed a bunch of plastic sound bytes shaped like bear heads. Virgil did as he was told, holding it tight.

“Place it right here,” He pointed to a little divot in the counter where the chip fit perfectly. Virgil set it right in. Then Terrence pressed the ‘buy’ button on the screen, which started loading. It only took a couple of seconds for the sound to be transferred to the chip.

“Great! Now press it to see if it works.” Terrence smiled. Virgil pressed it, holding it up to his ear. That was a bad idea, as he immediately had to move it away.

“Looks like it works!” Terrence chuckled, then took the chip and pushed it into the bear’s paw. “You’re all set! Once that group is done with their heart ceremony you’ll move right on up to that blue square where my friend Mr. Patton will get this little guy all stuffed up for yah.”

Logan and Virgil nodded. “Thank you,” Logan smiled, then turned towards the machine. Virgil tried to get a look at what was going on up ahead, but they were too far away to see or hear anything.

The wait seemed like forever, but soon it was their turn. The young man working the machine got up from his chair and turned towards them, “Alright folks, are we all good to go?”

Virgil smiled slightly as he noticed a shiny they/them pin on their apron. They had a mop of curly brown hair on their head, and circular glasses were perched on their freckled nose.

He looked at Logan, then nodded. Patton smiled, “Great! I’m gonna have you come around this way to that blue square over there.” They pointed to a large blue sticker on the floor next to the front counter. It had white paw prints on it.

They both stepped on the square, waiting to get started.

“See, the thing about this machine is that it needs energy to get it working, right?” Patton started as they put the pelt on the nozzle. “So that means you gotta either hop hop hop! Or clap clap clap! Or wiggle wiggle wiggle! To get the machine running. Do you think you can do that, kiddo?”

Virgil’s eyes widened as he blushed at the pet name. Yes, he did indeed want to clap clap clap, or hop hop hop, or wiggle wiggle wiggle, but he didn’t want to do it alone. He tugged on Logan’s sleeve. Logan blinked, “Oh, do I? Do I have to do it too?”

“If you want!” Patton smiled. Logan sighed, rolling his eyes, but nodded.

“Alright, let’s do this!” Patton exclaimed as they turned on the machine. Logan and Virgil started clapping, and Patton stepped on a pedal, moving the bear around the nozzle to get the stuffing in every limb, its chest, and its head.

“Alright! Great job kiddo!” Patton smiled as they took their foot off the pedal and the bear off the nozzle, checking it themself to see if it was the right softness.

“Now for the scent. Do you want it in the head or the belly?” They asked. Virgil bit down on his thumb. There were so many decisions to make! It was getting a bit much.

Logan sensed this, “We’ll do it in the belly.”

“Okay,” Patton smiled, taking the disc out of its plastic sleeve and slipping it into the bear through the hole in the back.

“Now we get to choose a heart! There’s either a red satin heart or a checkered heart.” Patton picked up two felt hearts from two bins on the machine and held them up, “Which one would you like, kiddo?”

Virgil’s eyes flitted between the two. After a pause Patton spoke up, "I know, it's a hard decision to make."

After another moment Virgil decided on the red one, pointing to it. Patton smiled, "Alright!" They placed the heart to the side, then picked another heart up, this one big and plastic, "We also have a beating heart option! We put it in the chest of the bear, and when you press down on it, it beats like a heart!"

Virgil’s eyes widened. He looked at Logan with them, pouting his lip a little. Logan smiled at him, giving him a nod. Virgil turned back to Patton, nodding enthusiastically.

"Okay!" Patton smiled, taking a heart, peeling the sticker off, and putting the sticker on the tag. They then placed the heart right in the front of the bear’s chest where a human’s heart would be.

“Now,” Patton said as they got up from their chair and took the now stuffed bear and the heart to the counter Logan and Virgil were standing next to.

“We are going to perform what is called the ‘squish test’. Which means you take your new friend and you give him the biggest hug that you possibly can!” They wrapped their arms around themself, “To see if he’s either as soft or firm enough as you want.”

They turned to Logan, “And if he’s too firm we can always take stuffing out, and if he’s too soft we can always put stuffing in.”

Logan nodded, then turned to Virgil, “Do you want to give him a hug?”

Virgil nodded, walking up to where the bear was sitting and grabbing it, feeling its arms, legs, chest, and head. He then embraced it in his arms, holding it as tight as he could. He smiled as he felt the pulsing of the heartbeat.

“Is he good?” Patton asked. Virgil turned to him, nodding.

“Perfect!” They smiled, “If you would put your friend back on the hug station, we are going to perform the Heart Ceremony,” They put emphasis on the last two words, “The most important step in this entire process! You’re going to take your heart.”

It took a minute for the request to process in his brain, but Virgil went back to the counter, put the bear back where it was sitting, and grabbed his heart.

“Now we gotta get it beating, alright kiddo? So you’re going to take it, hold it up like this,” They held it high above their head. Virgil did the same.

“And you gotta wiggle it like this!” Patton started waving their hand around. A smile broke out on Virgil’s face as he mimicked their movements. They wiggled for a moment, Patton giggling, “Do you think you got it beating, kiddo?”

Virgil nodded, smile not fading. Patton smiled at him, “Alright, now you’re going to go to your new friend, and you gotta wave it in his ears so that he’s a good listener!”

Virgil stepped over to the bear and waved the heart over its ears.

“Wave it on his arms so he can give you great big hugs!”

He waved it over its arms.

“Wave it on his legs so he can run and play with you all day!”

He waved it over its legs.

“Now grip your heart, hold it close, and make a great big wish!”

He held it close to his chest, closed his eyes and made his wish, I wish for me and Logan to live together forever.

“Did you make your wish?” Patton smiled. Virgil opened his eyes, smiling back as he nodded.

“Great! Now you get to do the honor of putting that heart into your friend through the hole in the back.”

Virgil grabbed the bear and shoved the heart in as far as it could go.

Patton gave a nod, “Alright, now if you would put your friend back on the hug station and step right back on that blue square, I’m gonna do the hard job of stitching him up, okay?”

Virgil nodded, doing as he was told. Patton stepped up to the counter and started pulling on the stitches. They glanced at Virgil's sticker, “I see it’s your birthday today!”

“In a week,” Logan corrected them. They nodded, “Oh! Okay, well, happy early birthday!” They looked closer, “And you’re turning twenty! Wow! I turned twenty this January!”

“Interesting.” Logan commented. Patton tied the last knot, cutting the extra string off. “Alright! This little guy is good to go! I’m gonna have you come around this way,” they pointed to their right, “to the back to pick out his clothing and accessories. Then you’ll take that tag to station 4 and scan it to give him his name!”

“Alright, thank you.” Logan smiled, leading Virgil around the direction Patton pointed them towards. Virgil looked back one last time to see Patton waving at him. He waved back shyly.

Thankfully the Harry Potter clothing section was right next to the stuffed animal section. Virgil’s eyes scanned the wall. He definitely wanted the traditional robes and a wand. But then he spotted a Quidditch uniform, along with a broom and a snitch.

He gasped slightly, turning to Logan, who nodded, “You can get both outfits if you’d like.”

Virgil whined, “But i’s ‘spensive…” He glanced away, biting his thumb.

Logan chuckled, “Virgil, it’s your birthday, and it’s you. You’re worth it. Besides, I’m getting paid soon anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.”

Virgil scrunched his nose, but took both the normal uniform and accessories and the Quidditch uniform and accessories off the hangers. He had to get on his tip-toes to reach some of them, but he got the hang of it.

“I’m guessing he’s a seeker, hm?” Logan hummed. Virgil nodded. Logan gave a nod back, “Alright, let’s give him a name, shall we?”

They walked over to the back corner on the other side of the store, where Station 4 was. Logan pressed some buttons, scanned the tag, and a menu popped up asking them to put in information for the bear’s birth certificate.

Now it was time to pick a name. Virgil bit down on his thumb, thinking very hard. Logan tilted his head, “What would you like to name him?”

Virgil smiled mischievously, “Logan!”

Logan scoffed, “Virgil, please. Pick an original name!”

“I’s original! ‘N Logan’s my favorite name!” Virgil beamed, turning back to the screen and typing in the name, “Logan the seeker.”

After the bear’s birth certificate was printed out, they walked up to the cash register. The young man standing at the register’s name tag read Joan. “Alright, are we all set?”

Logan nodded, putting all their findings on the counter. Virgil bit down on his thumb as he watched Joan scan the tags, starting to zone out. He wasn’t really interested in this part.

“Would you like to dress it here or when you get home?” Joan asked him. His eyes widened as he was snapped out of his daydreaming. He looked at them, then at Logan, then back to them. “Um, home,” He responded, now ancy to leave.

“Alright, would you like to hold it or put it in a box?” They asked. Virgil whined a bit under his breath. This was way too many questions for one day. “Box.”

Joan nodded at his firm answer. “Alright, with all of the accessories, your total comes out to one hundred and thirty five dollars, and forty five cents.”

Virgil gasped, looking at Logan with concern. That was a huge number. Logan just smiled at him reassuringly, “It’s alright Virgil, I really don’t mind,” He turned to Joan, “He’s a little concerned with money right now.”

“Oh I totally understand that,” They gave a smile, “I mean, I’m working two jobs and even I can’t afford to pay rent sometimes.” They turned back to the computer, muttering to themself, “Late stage capitalism.”

They took the bear and put it in a box, then bagged up all the clothes, “You should be all set. Oh! It’s your birthday! We have to ring the birthday bell!”

As they picked up a large bell from the shelf behind them, Logan squeezed Virgil’s hand, “It’s going to make a very loud noise, Virgil.”

Virgil looked at him as he braced himself. The loud ring of the bell crashed in his ears, running through his entire body. He cringed as he shut his eyes, stopping himself from covering his ears.

Then it was over, and he was able to open his eyes again. Logan leaned into his ear, “Good job.” He smiled. Virgil smiled back.

Then they were all good to go. Logan took the box and the bag, and grabbed Virgil’s hand as he led both of them out.

“Have a good day, kiddo!” Patton called with a smile as they walked past the machine. They both glanced at them. “Thank you.” Logan said before finally reaching the door.

“So, what did you wish for during the heart ceremony?” Logan asked as they took their purchases and headed for other stores, mostly Hot Topic.

“I tan’t tell you!” Virgil teased, “Or it won’t tome true.”

---------------------------------------------------------

Patton smiled to themself as they walked into the back room, unlocking their locker and taking their backpack out. Once they made sure everything was still in check, they took their apron off and slipped it in their locker, closing it and locking it again.

Today was another great day at work. Patton loved their job, really loved their job. They got to interact with all the cute kids and families that came in, and they adored all the smiles and giggles the heart ceremony provided.

There was always at least one memorable family that came in, and today it was a young couple, one of which had his birthday today. His name was Virgil, Patton remembered.

He was memorable because of one fact. Patton could see it in his eyes, in his posture, in his energy.

Patton got to meet a little.

They themself had been a babysitter for a couple of years now. Their friend Roman was a little, and when her partner Janus was busy, Patton got to babysit her. It brought them a lot of comfort and happiness, and they one day hoped to have a little of their own.

A pang of disappointment hit their chest. Virgil seemed so adorable and fun and loving, but it looked like he already had a caregiver. But they were happy for him nonetheless.

They brought themself out of their thoughts as they headed on out, waving goodbye to their coworkers. Their brisk walking speed got them to the food court fairly quickly, where they planned to have sushi for lunch.

But their eyes widened as they caught sight of a couple across the food court. It was Virgil and his caregiver! A smile broke out on their face, and they knew they had to take this opportunity to get to know them better.

They rushed to Virgil’s table, slowing down a bit as they got closer, “Hey! You guys are still here!”

They both turned to them, and Virgil jumped, quickly taking his thumb out of his mouth. His caregiver nodded, “Yes, we took a bit of time to do some extra shopping and get some food.”

“Yeah, I’m glad I was able to catch you guys! It was just the end of my shift so…” They smiled, trailing off a bit. “We didn’t really get to actually meet. I’m Patton!” They held out their hand.

“Logan,” Virgil’s caregiver took it, shaking firmly. Virgil just waved slightly, “Virgil.”

“Yeah, well, it was really nice to meet you guys! I hope you had fun, I always do.” They laughed nervously, trying so desperately not to make it awkward.

“Yes, I can confirm that our experience was most enjoyable, don’t you agree, Virgil?” Logan said, then turned to him. He nodded with a small smile on his face.

Patton stood there for a moment. They knew what they wanted to do, they just didn’t know if they had the guts to actually do it. “Hey, I don’t usually do stuff like this, but, can I get your guys’ Instagrams?”

“Oh, I don’t have one, but, Virgil? If that’s alright with you?” Logan asked him. He looked to Logan, then to Patton, but eventually nodded.

Patton smiled wide, “Great! Uh, here’s my phone, you can just put it in.” They handed Virgil their phone. He took it, quickly typing in his username in the search bar. He handed it back to them, a shy smile on his face.

“Great! Thank you! Again, it was really nice meeting you!” Patton beamed.

“It was a pleasure meeting you as well, Patton.” Logan responded. Virgil nodded in agreement.

Patton let out a sigh of relief, giving one last wave before heading down the food court the other way. They couldn’t help but continue to smile as they skipped along, soon reaching the sushi restaurant. They didn’t know how yet, but they knew this was the start of something special.

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lizzie-tempest · 4 years ago

Text

Fanfic Rec List part 2

This list is the harems! :D

I WILL BE ADDING MORE TO THIS! I JUST HAVE THEM SAVED IN MY BOOKMARKS AND HAVEN’T GOT AROUND TO READING THEM YET! THERE WILL BE MORE ADDED! *sobs*

(I have tagged as many authors as I possibly can. If an author isn’t tagged, it’ll be because they don’t have a Tumblr or I can’t find/get on their blog. If you know for certain that one of the authors has a Tumblr and they haven’t been tagged, please let me know so I can tag them!)

Monstrum Sceletus by Vivalavidapasta (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, ABO dynamics, pining, violence, non-con)

You’re a scientist stranded on an island. Despite your attempts to continue your research, a bunch of feral skeleton monsters just won’t leave you alone and intend to make you a member of their pack! Ah well. At least you can use this in your research. Oh personally, I love reading the tags on this story. They are hilarious.

What’s in the attic? by Shadowandblack (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, angst, yandere) @shadowandblack

Mutt decides to do some poking around and when he does, he finds the door to the attic locked tight. With you behind it. He knows that Sans has something to do with it, so he becomes friends with you in secret. And while he does, he starts to hatch a plan to get you out of there.

Sleepin’ with the Fishes by Catsitta (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, mystery, angst, violence) @catsitta

MobMer AU. You have always managed to attract the presence of the Fae. It’s caused more than its fair share of problems. So when a nice gentleman on the beach gives you a pearl necklace and offers you a job selling his wares, you can’t pass up the opportunity. You need a job and this could be the one way you have some kind of normality in your life. It turns out that it’s not as normal as you had hoped.

Friends of the Fourth Kind by JoJo419 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, fluff, angst, romance) @blazewatergem

You are a little fairy who helped guide Frisk through the Underground. Unfortunately, you are still trying to regrow your wings so they sneak you into the skeleton brothers’ house so that you can take your time to recuperate. And then there are four more skeletons and it becomes harder to hide your existence.

Skeleton Squatters and the Landlady by Tyrant_Tortoise (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst) @tyranttortoise

You’ve been stressed from work and your asshole of a boyfriend so you decide to spend the weekend in the middle of nowhere. To be more specific, your grandpa’s old lodge. But when you get there, you find that it’s not as empty as you thought. It’s inhabited by a bunch of skeleton monsters. They’re more than happy to buy the place from you, but instead you decide to become their Landlady. Let the shenanigans begin.

Skeleton Shenanigans and the Landlady by Tyrant_Tortoise (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst)

Set during the story of Skeleton Squatters and the Landlady. This consists of scenes that didn’t make it into the story, the POVs of the different skeletons and alternate takes on scenes in the story already. Definitely recommend reading the original if you want to understand any scenarios going on here.

Zoot Suit Riot by YinYanChan (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance) @yinyanchan

Mob AU. All the skeletons are mobsters. You live with Sans and Papyrus and are just friends. However, the two skeletons have romantic intentions and insist on spoiling you at any opportunity. Then Sans’ machine blows up and a whole load of other mobster skeletons are suddenly there. Oh, and you also don’t know that they’re actually mobsters. And they also haven’t told you that you’re their soulmate. It’s fun to read Sans getting so frustrated.

Bitty Hunt by Rnd_Injustice (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance? fluff, angst) @rnd-injustice

You are a bitty; a human who was turned into a tiny version of yourself when the monsters surfaced. Usually the humans turned into bitties are taken away and then adopted by others as they have no memories of their former life. You still have your memories however. And you have been fighting with everything you have to keep your home. When a bunch of skeletons move in without your permission, you make it clear that you don’t want them there and you make it your mission to make them leave.

Rose and Bones by Fukae_Flwr83 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, yandere, character death) @fukae-flwr

You’ve always been told not to visit the mansion that is owned by your family. Once your parents pass away, you decide to break this rule and visit it and the tenants that reside there. The longer you spend there, the more you think that your parents kept you away for a reason.

THE ALPHA TIMELINE by Sh33tMeDead336 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, violence, character death, fluff, angst, mind the tags) @sh33tmedead336

An interesting take on the reverse harem trope. The Reader is from the Horrortale AU and is close to the Sans and Papyrus of that AU when all three of them are pulled into the Tale verse. The other skeletons in the house are already extremely cautious of the Horror boys, but with you thrown into the mix? They don’t know what to do and make it clear that they don’t trust you or the brothers you came with.

Skeletons in Heat by TheMsource (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, angst) @themsource

After being dumped and made homeless by your ex, you spend the night in Grillby’s, drowning your sorrows in booze. This is where you meet Sans the skeleton. After hearing of your predicament and engaging in some...fun activities, he offers you a deal. To live with him and his family and help them out with their heat cycles. He even offers to pay you! You don’t have anywhere else to go, so you accept his deal.

A Songbird’s Lament by Mitsuko_Elric, XrosaryX (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst)

Inspired by the story Six Skeletons, One Maid by RacoonSinQueen, this story follows the sister of the maid in the original story. You have become a maid to six skeletons in order to find your sister. The skeletons you serve aren’t the usual gaggle of skeletons. Instead they consist of the brothers from Mobtale, Dancetale and Altertale. My favourite thing about this story is the way that AlterTale has been included. I haven’t found many stories on the AU itself yet, but I am soft for Alter Sans who acts all protective, gentle and fatherly. <3

A Mouse Among Skeletons by Duchess_Aquarius (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, character death, mind the tags)

You’re used to your twin sister Edwina stealing friendships and relationships, so when she introduces herself to your friends Blue and Papyrus, you believe that it will happen again. Turns out, they’re not as easy to manipulate as Edwina thought. After a series of events, you end up living with the skeletons. And then you find out that some of them happen to be your soulmates.

Guilt In The Eyes Of Sinners by KallicaTheNerd (complete?) (Multi-chapter, angst, character death, mind the tags)

Inspired by the story Six Skeletons, One Maid by RacoonSinQueen, this is a sort of “what if” story. You get a letter from your mother while working for the skeletons. And unfortunately, it’s not good news. Sans hasn’t been keeping his end of the deal, and now your family has suffered the consequences. The story itself isn’t marked as complete, but with the way the fourth chapter ends, I think it’s safe to say that it is.

The Priestess and the Soul Guardians by FireflyKisses (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, non-con, violence, character death, mind the tags) @rayeofintegrity

You try to end your life by falling into Mount Ebbot, and ultimately fail. Sans and Papyrus are the ones to find you in the Ruins. They have been waiting for you. It turns out that you are a Priestess, destined to bond with six guardians and use the power to summon a Beast God in order to break the barrier across all universes so that monsters can go free. However, there is discord in the Underground. Not all of the monsters agree with Queen Toriel and the idea of a human being a Priestess.

Six Skeletons In Your Closet by MsMK (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, slow burn, violence, character death, mind the tags) @msmkcreates

You’re constantly on the run from your family, never settling down for long. After your roommates find out about the terrible secrets you carry, you find yourself in need of a place to stay again. Your friend Sans offers you a room at his place and while you’re hesitant to accept, you need a place to stay. You didn’t expect to get so attached to all the skeletons that live there.

Six Skeletons In Heat by MsMK (ongoing?) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut)

A “what if” of the story Six Skeletons In Your Closet, this covers what would have happened if you hadn’t been rescued and instead stayed with the skeletons in order to help them with their heat. Each skeleton of the household gets their own chapter, so even though it’s not marked as complete, it could be seen as being so.

Six Skeletons, One Maid by RacoonSinQueen (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence) @raccoonsinqueen

You are the single maid working for six skeletons. You cater to their every whim, do the cooking, cleaning, laundry and any task they ask of you. In return? Your Master Sans send money to your family, so that they can pay off a debt. It’s hard work and damn frustrating at times, but you are determined to make this work. Besides, you’re good at your job.

You Matter To Me by myownpersonaldemons (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst, slow burn) @myownpersonaldemons

You’re good friends with the skeletons. One night, you get home and find your boyfriend is cheating on you. With your sister. Hurt and betrayed, you go back to the skeletons and spend the night, pretending that everything is okay the next morning. At first you only tell Stretch about what’s going on. It’s only a matter of time until the others find out too.

Six Skeletons and The Waitress by Teutonic_lisp (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, violence, mind the tags) @teutonicfanfics

Your two brothers are manipulative, controlling and violent, claiming that their actions are purely for your own good. You’re actually relieved when you get the chance to move in with an old friend. You believe you’re finally going to get away from a bad situation. Except your “friend” isn’t exactly...well she’s horrible. Is there no one who can save you?

Learning A Little by Nightmare_Walker14, sketchy_sketch (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort)

You are kicked out by your ex and your friend Papyrus offers you a place to stay. Some of the skeletons are fine with you, but there are some who believe that something isn’t right. Eventually they find out your secret. You are a Little.

You Snooze, You Lose by Cryybabyy (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, angst, character death) @she-a-crybaby

You are in a relationship with Sans and perfectly happy. Unfortunately, he doesn’t feel the same and breaks up with you. 2 years later and you return to Ebott. One of the first people you bump into happens to be none other than Sans. Now his alternates and their brothers have you in their sights and want you for themselves and Sans is jealous.

party of six. by alchemic (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, comfort) @alch3mic

You are in an established polyamorous relationship with Sans, Blue, Axe, Black and Red. Chapters consist of various slice-of-life drabbles and just oozes fluff and good vibes. A lovely story to read when feeling down, as the interactions between the characters and Reader is so heartfelt that it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :3

Don’t Dimension It by Frothy_Frowns (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, smut, yandere, fast burn) @dont-dimension-it

After the Multiverse converged, you became roommates with Scarlet and Sakura, who happen to be the Fell version of Undyne and Alphys. They are very protective over you, so much so that they see themselves as parental figures to you. When stopping by the skeleton brothers’ house one day, it’s revealed that the brothers are your mates. Before you can get too overwhelmed, Scarlet and Sakura step in and set some boundaries for the boneheads. You are only to see two at a time. No ifs, ands or buts.

The Sacrificial Skeleton And The Labyrinth Of Gods by this_is_my_alt (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, lil non-con, violence)

You are a necromancer who used to be human. After your death you turned into a skeleton. With your friends gone, you set out on a journey to try and find if there are others like you out there. You hear about a village who worships gods. Gods who happen to be skeletons, like yourself. Excited at the idea of finding more skeletons like you, you immediately journey to the village to try and find them.

Good Boy by this_is_my_alt (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, smut, non-con, substance abuse, violence, mind the tags)

On trying to find fellow pet owners, you end up in a pretty chaotic situation. You find yourself surrounded by a kinky Mutt, a gaster! blaster Sans named Fang and Axe wearing cat ears. Well, at least you've got your adorable dog Wuffie to help you get through it.

Tangled Strings by RoseTeaCup (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, smut)

You are best friends with the Swap brothers, but you like them both. They like you too, but they won’t tell you their feelings. One day, their “cousins” Black and Pup (Swapfell bros) have to stay with them. The second you meet them, you feel an instant connection with the two new brothers. Seeing the connection, Blue and Stretch start to get jealous and you feel increasingly confused about how you feel.

Dropped From The Not-So Heavens by FidgetBird (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, angst, violence, character death)

You are from the Birdtale AU and have wings. You’re in a relationship with your Sans. Unfortunately, things haven’t been great in your AU for a while. In a last ditch effort to save both you and himself, your Sans uses his machine to take you both to the Tale verse, where all the other AUs have ended up. But when you finally wake up, you’re in the care of the Horror boys and Dust and your Sans is nowhere to be found.

Cold Currents by JacketBones (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff) @jacketbones

You’re a mermaid and you somehow manage to make friends with the skeletons, despite there being a language barrier. When they find you far from your home in the ocean, they vow to help you get back.

A tale of Myth and Legend by Tashamon04 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence, character death)

Sans has tampered so much with the machine that not only has he brought his and his brother’s alternate selves over from their own universes, it’s caused the multiverse to start collapsing. Now it’s a race against time to find a mage from legend who may be able to stop this and fix things before it’s too late.

You’re Broke? They Break Bones and Break Bank by Trash_McTrash (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn) @trashmcwrites

Mob AU where all the skeletons are mobsters. You are broke as hell and you somehow gain the attention of some very generous individuals. They’re more than happy to pay for your furniture and anything else you may need. But you don’t really know who they could be, or why they’re helping you.

I See You by PandaWrites_Fics (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, ABO dynamics, smut)

Not all monsters were forced Underground. You are a skeleton monster and after the death of your family, you find the monsters who have recently resurfaced. Moved by your sorrow, Asgore and Toriel give you a little cottage in a forest where you can live out your life in loneliness. And then, the gaggle of skeletons move into a mansion nearby. They don’t know you’re a monster, and they want you out. You’re not taking this harassment lying down.

Unexpected Housemates by BigTrashPile (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, mild horror) @bigoltrashpile

An AU of Aggre(g/v)ation by Llama_Goddess. In this story, you have just moved into a new house. No one else will touch it because it’s supposedly haunted, meaning that you get it at a steal. Turns out that the rumours are true. It IS haunted. By the spirits of three skeleton monsters. And because you set them free from the dolls they were trapped in, they will do anything for you.

Mediocre Expectations by BigTrashPile (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence, tags to be added)

Mafia AU. After you're fired for serving Frisk and Monster Kid, you find yourself desperate for work. Luckily, Frisk's adopted uncle Sans hands you a job on a silver platter. All you have to do is cook for him and his "cousins".

Dear Hearts and Gentle People by Esuerc (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst) @esuerc

After finding you in a trap, the Horrortale brothers take you back to their cabin in the woods to nurse you back to health. It’s obvious that you are friends with the skeletons at the main household, but when you finally wake up you have no memory of what happened to you or even who you are. Crooks takes this opportunity to keep you for himself.

The Skeletons and the NOT Pot Dealer by NihilismPastry (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, angst) @nihilismpastry

You’re a herbalist and Sans seeks out your service to help with calming down some of the more...violent skeletons. You try and explain multiple times that you don’t sell pot, but he doesn’t listen. Against your better judgement, you decide to take the job.

Second Floor Skeletons by sansual (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, angst) @sansualfics

Your university has extra space when the monsters resurface and offers to house some of the monsters. All of the monsters on the floor above your room are none other than the many skeletons of the numerous AUs, including the Gasters. And they are all dying to get to know you.

I Have The Power of Gaster AND Anime On My Side by littlexsiren (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, angst)

Sans fucked up with the machine again. There’s a whole host of skeletons now, and they all want to jump your bones. Pun intended. Luckily, you have Gaster fighting in your corner and acting as a protective father towards you.

But No One Came by AmberLynn2424 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, ABO dynamics, smut, angst)

After eating monster food, you are suddenly able to see stats. It doesn’t do you any favours. After running into the skeletons, your life starts to take a different direction. You’re unable to tell if it’s a good thing.

Lovely Bones just Lovely. by LovelyHuman83 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst)

You are a skeleton monster who was never sealed Underground and are the very last of your kind. At least, until you come across the skeleton brothers. You end up living with them and it can be pretty hard being the only female skeleton in a house full of males!

Live Again by Novicenox (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, angst, mind the tags) @daveysramblehour

After receiving a bad phone call from your father, you end up in Grillby’s bar. You meet Sans there and even after you leave, he finds himself concerned about you. So he ropes in the rest of the family and it doesn’t take long for them to find out about your abusive parents.

Perpetually Boned by katzenjam (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst) @undertaleimaginationland

You saved up all your money and instead of using it to go on vacation, you decided to buy a new house so that you can get away from your awful roommates and start a brand new life! Your neighbours are interesting too. Your house is surrounded by houses owned by skeletons. Shenanigans ensue once they introduce themselves.

On Top of the Bone Pile by Lyrjok (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, hurt/comfort, slight non-con, violence) @lady-lyrjok

You are a bartender who is best friends with Sans and Papyrus. You can’t imagine life without them. Then more skeletons appear out of nowhere and they take a great interest in you.

Starlight by LukaDeer (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, mind the tags) @hyrulessongkeeper

You answer an ad to be a live in nanny. The advert says that your expenses will be paid and is practically rent free. It seems like a pretty good deal. Sure, it means you’ll have to take care of a lot of kids that seem to be fighting, but the guy you spoke to on the phone, Sans, who you presume is the dad, seems to be at his wits end. You’re determined to help this guy out. It’s only when you get to the house with all your stuff and sign the contract that you realize that the advert wasn’t exactly truthful. There are no kids.

My Ordinary Life by BoujeeD (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, angst, violence, character death)

You’re a day-care worker just trying to go about your ordinary life. You end up meeting a skeleton at a bar and trade numbers with him. Then you meet another skeleton. And another. And suddenly your life isn’t as ordinary as it used to be. My favourite thing about this story is how the author portrays Axe. He’s so delightfully unhinged but you can tell that he’s trying to be romantic and it just results in some truly hilarious scenarios and I love it.

I’m no human by Desolateskeleton37 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, angst, non-con, violence, mind the tags) @imnohuman-undertaleficblog

Sans is able to bring back Gaster from the void. He appreciates that his son is protective of him now, but he still wishes for alone time and so sneaks out of the house at night to walk by the ocean. It’s on one such nights that Gaster finds you. After your failed attempt at suicide, you have no wish to be alive as a human. Gaster decides to bring you back to his lab because he has a solution.

Windows to the Soul by Rochesa (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, violence) @moramulti

You are offered a job to be a live-in therapist by none other than Sans. Things have been incredibly tense in the mansion with all the skeletons from different AUs crammed in one space. You have your work cut out for you, but Sans is hopeful that you can help.

It's All Bones, Baby by TrasBen (ongoing) (Multichapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, substance abuse, hurt/comfort, violence, character death) @beanniebenn

You're a skeleton who is trying to recover from the death of your mentor, Gaster. While trying to fix the machine, a button that belonged to your mentor falls in. While you try and get it back, you soon find yourself trapped in the machine. When you wake up, you're in another universe with two skeletons staring back at you.

Skeleton x Skeleton by Tea_Cup (PumpkinFlash) (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, slow burn) @pumpkinflash

You are a mystic skeleton heading to Ebott City for some monster food. While walking through some woods, you get caught in a trap and end up getting rescued by two skeletons; one of which is a ghost. They invite you to spend the night at their house and you accept their invitation.

A Skele-ton of Fun by lollipopkitten93 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut, angst, violence) @lollipopskele

You're in Ebott City, going to college against your mothers wishes so you can be a zoologist. When your monsterphobic roommate kicks you out, your good friend Sans gives you a solution. Move in with him and his brother. And their cousins.

The Soul's Song by Galactic_Eden (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, smut, violence, character death, substance abuse) @galactic-eden

You're an art student that's lived in the North-east for most of your life. Life is pretty boring until you get some new neighbours. Who happen to be skeleton monsters. They quickly become involved in your life, and you don't really mind.

Into The Bonezones by Saiyurimai (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, slow burn, angst) @saiyurimaiandtheden

When you find yourself out of a job and getting kicked out of your apartment, your skeletal friends Papyrus and Blue suggest you move in with them and their brothers and cousins. You tell yourself that it's just until you get back on your feet, but you really do enjoy living with them.

All Gone by cateronix (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, smut, hurt/comfort, substance abuse, violence, non-con)

You're just trying to get through life when you're dragged into another universe and dumped in front of a load of skeleton monsters. You actually know these guys. You're a fan of Undertale and you know the characters and their alternates. Years ago, you would've been jumping for joy. Now you just want to go home. And the skeletons are more than just a little suspicious of you.

A Nanny Among The Feral by Pchan2017 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, smut, ABO dynamics, violence) @washedupfae

After surviving a storm and washing up on an island, you do the best you can to ensure that you, your son and your other young charge, survive. It's not easy, but the three of you are making it work. And then the skeletal inhabitants make themselves known. And there's a lot of them.

A SANSational Experiment by Britkiir (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, smut, violence) @queenbritkiir

You work in a lab with Sans. One night, he calls you and asks you to come to the lab because the machine you've been monitoring is creating interesting readings. It's acting out because of the storm and when Sans accidentally touches it, you're thrown back and black out. When you wake up, there are three more Sanses in front of you.

Our Place Among The Stars by Nascent (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, smut, violence, character death) @nascent-chaos

After stopping a racist protest from potentially dusting a group of skeleton monsters, you end up being fired from your security job. Instead of being down in the dumps, you take this as an opportunity to do something you'd be much happier with; getting a job at Muffet's bakery. While working, you end up seeing some of the skeletons again and it's only a matter of time before you become friends.

My hand slipped by xiphiathepeacefullsword (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance) @xiphiathepeacefullsword

You are rich, going to college and bored out of your mind. It starts with getting a random text message. Before you knew it, the guy you'd been texting has moved in next door with his family. They're all skeleton monsters. Oh, and they're ALL your soulmates. Personal note: this story is hilarious. Reader doesn't take any shit and the fourth wall breaking is great.

You Don't Need Saving by ThemSoundwaves (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst, violence, substance abuse) @themsoundwaves

You used to have everything. Good home, great family. The world was your oyster. But you decided to leave it all behind. Running away at 15, you made your way to Ebott City. Now you fight in an illegal fighting ring. Probably not the best life to lead, but you still love it. You start questioning your decisions when you meet a bunch of skeletons.

Startale Undervalley by UnholyKrow (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, angst) @unholykrowcollection

Birdie is a fangirl in a world where the Undertale world (and the AUs) have converged with the real world. After running away, they end up in Stardew Valley and decide to have a fresh start. Which is hard to do when the whole town is made up of skeletons.

The Crasher by AKA_Indulgence (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff) @aka-indulgence

You're good friends with Sans and you miss him terribly. He's been absent for a while. You understand that life can get in the way, so in the meantime you end up meeting two new skeletons. After finally meeting with Sans again, you end up in a house fire and needing a place to stay. Sans is more than happy to let you crash with him for a while.

Make the World Afraid by theragingprophet (complete) (Multi-chapter, fluff, angst, slow burn) @theragingprophet

After the monsters surfaced from the Underground, other monsters revealed their existence. These monsters had never been trapped, instead hiding their true selves from humans. You are also a Surface monster. But with your species being generally despised by humans and monsters alike, you hide who you really are. It can be quite lonely.

The House on Lane 66 by OolongTeacup (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, hurt/comfort, smut, angst, violence, character death) @oolongteacup426

It's your final year of college and you desperately need a way to pay off your student debt. So you answer an advert in the paper for a groundskeeper. The ad says that the applicant MUST be monster friendly and you presume it's because of how close the address is to the mountain and the monsters that emerged. You don't expect your new employers to be a family of skeleton monsters.

Throw Me a Bone Here, I'm Trying My Best by randomassuser (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, fluff, angst, violence, tags to be added) @randomhailee

When monsters surface, it doesn't take long for you to become friends with Sans and Papyrus. But after an accident where Sans' machine destroys their apartment, you invite them to live with you. Your apartment is more than big enough. But it turns out that the accident with the machine actually pulled in alternate versions of your friends into this universe. Now they're all staying with you and helping you run your cafe.

The She Alpha and The Skeletons by Blueberrybagel (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence, character death, non con, ABO dynamics)

After waking up stranded on an island and discovering your beloved sister is dead, you do your best to survive and grieve at the same time. Your sister would want you to live and you do your best. But it's made a little more difficult with all these skeletons following you around like lovestruck puppies.

Jail Time Rock by Loopylulu258 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence) @self-indulgent-gremlin

Aggre AU. You're hired as a nurse for Mt Ebbot Prison. Your main patient is Sans the skeleton, who needs weekly check ups due to his low HP. And then you meet Red, who rules the prison courtyard and isn't afraid to get into fights. Then there's Skull, who is locked away with the most dangerous prisoners, but for some reason he's like a puppy when with you.

Crowd Control by owl_bones (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence) @owl-bones

You've been housemates with Sans and Papyrus for a while now and you're the best of friends. Then Sans manages to bring different versions of himself and his brother through to this universe and the house you're living in gets rather cramped. So you decide to find a bigger house and move out. Easier said than done when trying to control all these skeletons.

Gumtrees and Gaster Blasters by wannabuyahotcat (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, fluff, angst, substance abuse, tags to be added) @wannabuyahotcat

When looking for a room to rent, you find an extremely cheap one in the mountains. It seems a bit too good to be true. When you go and look at the place, you figure out that you'll be rooming with 10 skeletons. Could be fun though.

Meeting Your Soulmates on Animal Crossing by PunnyPearl (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst) @punnypearlpeppermint

Everyone has a soulmate and in this world, it just so happens that you can't actually see their face until a certain event happens. So when your friends get you Animal Crossing for your birthday, you start to meet your multiple soulmates through playing the game.

Family is where the Love is! by basurtoj15 (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, angst, violence, mind the tags) @ask-bassyj15

Looking after your twin brothers isn't easy, especially when they beg for pets and lose interest in a week. You're often left to care for the poor thing, but sooner or later every pet ends up disappearing or going to "the farm". This time, the boys want the latest craze: Bitties. You're not happy with this, but your parents ask you to go along with it and so you take them to get a bitty. What happens in the store affects you and your family for the rest of your lives.

Skeleton Squatters and the Vampire by Xenbonzacura (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, fluff, smut) @splintertale-stories-blog

You're a vampire and after living in the city for too long, you decide to retreat back to your forest home. But when you finally get there, you're not expecting a family of skeleton monsters to already be living there.

Skeleton's Small Problems by Novacainne (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, hurt/comfort, slow burn, tags to be added)

When you're only a few inches tall and the whole world seems against you, it's hard to trust anyone. But when a group of unwanted skeletons move into the house you've been occupying, your beloved dog companion takes a shine to them. Her instincts aren't usually wrong, but you're not going to trust the skeletons straight away.

Free Love by tagitup (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, tags to be added) @time-is-pain

By day, you're a barista and at night you are a DJ. But when you find yourself thrown out of your home and have nowhere to go, a regular customer finds you and offers up a helping hand. So you move in with him and his cousins until you are back up on your feet.

Green Threads of Life by blacksilks (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, smut, angst, character death, non-con, violence) @blacksilks

When you get caught in a shooting and end up in a coma, the political world of humans and monsters are thrown into chaos. Once you wake up, your life is turned upside down and the new and painful scars that have been carved into your skin cause new disagreements.

Fucking Superb You Funky Little Bat by TastySins_tm (complete) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, smut, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, violence) @itsthesinbin

You're a surface monster; a vampire. And you can't remember your name or your past. All you know is that you wanted to get out of this horrible facility that keeps torturing you. So when you get the chance to escape, you run as far away as possible. While hiding in some woods, you come across a cabin that's the home to a bunch of skeletons. Once they discover you, instead of reacting with fear like you expected, they keep bringing you food. Not that you're complaining.

Life With the Bone Brigade by ValkyrieOfSmut (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, smut, fluff, angst, slow burn) @valkyrieofsmut

When (Y/n) loses both her jobs and apartment, she packs her camper full of her stuff and decides to look for a new place to live and work. For the time being, she decides to camp out in a seemingly abandoned campground in the middle of nowhere. Well, she thinks there's no one there until a skeleton with a head wound tries to turn her into his next meal.

Different Paths to the Heart by LovelyMemory (ongoing) (Multi-chapter, romance, slow burn, fluff, tags to be added) @artistgamersketches

It's hard trying to work 2 different jobs and trying to scrape by. When you finally catch a break, you end up meeting a skeleton. And another. And another. And with each new skeleton you meet, you find that each one has a different way of finding their way into your heart.

#masterpost #masterpost part 2 #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfic rec list #undertale #harem fanfic

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