#it's a philosophical issue I have with the show but Alive already exists so lets see some crazy shit now!

[sonnerly]

Something I thought about after last night’s episode: the real life Flight 571 crash-- or, how normal people behave re: survival cannibalism. screenshots from the Wikipedia section titled “Cannibalism”

[askaceattorney]

Turnabout Goodbyes (again)

Brace yourselves -- this is gonna be long one.

Dear Followers,

Whew...  We made it through another year somehow.  Congratulations to everyone who’s still mentally in one piece -- I’m just barely there myself.  There’s nothing like the holidays, a pandemic, employee shortages, inflation, and a severe lack of human interaction to make you sweat, is there?

Thankfully, that only partly describes the world we live in.  As you know if you watched my 11th parting gift (and I don’t blame you if you didn’t, ‘cause it was admittedly kinda odd), I’m a strong believer in holding onto hope, not just because it makes life somewhat easier and more enjoyable, but because it’s the ones who hold onto hope until the bitter end who find success in life.  You don’t have to be a lawyer, an Ace Attorney fan, or a gamer at all, to see the proof of that.

I realize that doesn’t mean holding onto hope is easy, of course.  From the time I began on this blog until now, I’ve gained a total of four jobs and lost three of them, not because I was incompetent, but because of the simple fear of being incompetent (in other words, I quit them for various reasons, the biggest one being impostor syndrome).  I’ve also dealt with a fair amount of physical and emotional ailments, including chronic anxiety and depression (yeah, me too), a lack of energy, and a vitamin deficiency that made both of those issues worse.  I’m not saying all this to draw attention to my problems, of course -- in fact, I’d say I’ve had it pretty good overall -- but to show that I’m familiar with the difficulty of holding onto hope in a hopeless-seeming situation.  We don’t have the luxury of saving and reloading our game in the real world, unfortunately.

The good news is (here we go again), holding onto hope is, in my opinion, the biggest reason why I and so many others have been able to plow through these and other rough situations.  There are times when hope seems as visible as the world around you, times when it’s harder to see it, and times where you could be convinced that it only exists in your mind, but not once have I lost anything by holding onto hope or gained anything by letting go of it.  In fact, some of my biggest regrets happened when I decided to let it go.

So, while I can’t know exactly what you’re going through, I can say without a doubt that as long as you’re alive, sound of mind, and willing to make an effort, you have every chance in the world of achieving whatever it is you’re hoping for, whether it’s a good job, a better life situation, a steady loving relationship, clarity of thought, confidence, justice, or a better world to live in.  As long as you have those three things in place, there’s no excuse for letting go of hope, so...

Was it not Adam West who once said, “E--

“Enough with the philosophical mumbo-jumbo already!  Just get on with the thanking part!”

...You’re right.  Sorry for getting carried away.

(Sheesh, it’s not like this is my final speech or anything, right?)

So, I was hoping to have some kind of final project prepared now that I’m finally making my departure from the de Modder clan, but I got hit with a little insomnia right around the end of the year, so it looks like that’ll have to wait for now.  In the meantime, I believe some thanks are in order.  There’s no way on earth I could’ve pulled something like this off on my own, after all, so...

Thank you to CAPCOM for creating Ace Attorney, a game series that somehow gave us lessons about life, the truth, and justice through the stories of anime lawyers.

Thank you to the Ace Admin for creating this blog, and to the Mod for bringing it to its current level of popularity.  I know I’m not the only one who’s grateful to both of you for using your talents to make Ace Attorney that much more enjoyable for its fanbase.

Thank you to the Modthorne for suggesting that I apply for a Mod position during the Mod’s first audition...then allowing me to join up after I didn’t.  X )

Thank you to Mod Paups, Mod Maya, and Mod Vera for the help you provided while you were here.  Once again, best of luck in your future endeavors.

Thank you to Mod Kristoph, Mod Edgeworth, and Mod Justice for all the work you’ve done.  Trust me when I say it came at just the right time.

Thank you to the Tumblr staff for creating a platform that makes this sort of blog possible.  And also for including hashtags.  I love those.

Thank you to podcaster and writer Matt Walsh for your advice on striking a balance between boldness and sensitivity.

Thank you to God Almighty for giving this chance to spread some of His joy and laughter here.

Aaaaaaaaand of course...thank you to every single one of you.  Whether you’ve written one or more letters to this blog, liked or commented on any of them, offered some advice or correction, or simply stopped by to peruse our little puppet show, thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking part in it.  Whether you meant to or not, you helped to make it what it is.

And now, if it’s all right with you, I’d like to say a few fictitious final words to the gang here.

To Phoenix Wright: Never stop defending the innocent.

“Of course.”

To Maya Fey: Never stop being awesome.

“Couldn’t if I wanted to!”

To Miles Edgeworth: Never stop pursuing the truth.

”Naturally.”

To Pearl Fey: Never stop being adorable.

”Thank you, Mr. Co-Mod!”

To Trucy Wright: Never stop amazing people.

“Can do!”

To Apollo Justice: Never yield.

“Sure thing.”

To Athena Cykes: Never stop being yourself.

“You know it!”

To Ema Skye: Never stop learning.

“Thanks!  You either.”

To Dick Gumshoe: Never stop being dependable.

“You got it, pal!”

To Franziska von Karma: Never stop aiming for perfection.

“Hmph...  I would not dare.”

To Sister Iris: Never stop becoming a better person.

“Hmm...  Thank you.”

To Dahlia Hawthorne: Um...............  Good luck out there?

“..........................”

And...sorry for the harsh treatment.  I guess not all of it was deserved.

“.........”

To Godot: Keep a cool head.

“That’s one of my rules.”

Of course it is.

To Ibuki Mioda: ...

...Wait, what are you doing here?

“...?”

Ah, well.  Best of luck to you, I guess.

And with that, I must bid you adieu.

Or if you’d rather have a GIF with a few more frames...

I still have a few essays to finish (as well as a final project), so I won’t be completely gone, but my days of answering character letters and Mod letters have finally reached their end.

It’s been a blast, everyone.  Thank you for sharing it with me.

Sincerely,

-James “Co-Mod” C.

[suffering-with-fiery]

Rune translations and Bottom theories (I did my best!) (: It's long! I mean REALLY REALLY REALLY LONG!!!! You've been warned. (Potential TWs below the cut) yeah Hyoga doesn't have a good time here.

I should probably start calling Hyoga "Hyouga" instead since I'm pretty sure it's spelled with a 'U'... but I probably won't. Apologies.

Bottom English translation by Tackmyn Y! (I can't speak Japanese, again, apologies, though I was able to make my own version of Autophagy)

Potential TWs (I dont want to harm anyone by going on this rant): Autophagy (medical terms), nightmares, demons tormenting a guy, Hyoga being unhealthy in more ways than one, mentions of death/murder, self esteem issues, mentions of destructive behavior, manipulation, violence.

Yeah, my boy Hyoga ain't having a good time in this theory.

I feel the need to clarify that this is all speculation. So uh. Everything here is just what I've been thinking about since I hopped into this rabbit hole.

Sinfan (I'm not sure what order they go in, it's quite hard to tell):

["Death"

"I"

"Revive"

"Spirit"

"I"

"Something with shape"]

I'm not fully sure what "something with shape" means, but there's a possibility that Sinfan could be referring to Hyoga, (a doll/wax figure) or maybe that Sinfan needs something with a shape to be able to exist. Sinfan could need a vessel to stay on the mortal plain and go undetected while staying alive.

Sinfan needs a vessel. And with that thought, it launches into indecipherable theory crafting.

Hyoga summoned Sinfan when he was 12 years old. Thinking he found a vessel, he called upon Pabometh, another grey demon, to help torment Hyoga so the two could get their wish.

Hyoga, at the time, is young, dumb and susceptible to manipulation, meaning it could be easy for Sinfan to grasp the situation with an iron grip which follows Hyoga into adulthood.

"Revival" could also be referring to "Rebirth," symbolized by a butterfly. It could also mean that Sinfan/Pabo has the powers to revive people. Maybe as a last resort if they need it.

In Hiiragi Kirai's album trailer on Youtube, Hyoga shows up in a scene with 'D' and 'B' in calligraphy on each cheek. They could mean "Death" and "Birth" respectively.

Lines from Autophagy:

"I just wants a peaceful life." Likely means Hyoga wants the demons gone so he can live how he wants to. (Who wouldn't?)

"The voice inside my head? Huh... how odd." Also implies that the demons are still with him.

"My body pulses, memories from my past bringing pain." Means that in Autophagy, Hyoga remembers his past, but it hurts him.

""You can't avoid it in life, so it's best to just deal with it." You say, but you dont seem bothered." Is most likely Sinfan talking to Hyoga. It could also mean that Hyoga can't avoid the demons, so he should just deal with it.

"I can't stop now, so pretend nothing happened!" Could be Hyoga trying to ignore the demons, or maybe he did something he shouldn't have. (Always knew those were prison tattoos...)

"I want to wash my skull out! I want to say bye bye! But yet I didn't do it..." Could mean that the demons are still with him in Autophagy and likely still tormenting him.

"I won't stop, I can't look back." Might mean Hyoga is trying to move on, but with the demons still in his head, he can't, so the "Let me forget!" after the instrument solo might be him wishing that he never remembered in the first place and trying to get the demons to take them away again.

"Just stay away from me!" Could be Hyoga distancing himself from everyone he knows, or trying to get the demons to go away.

"Hello! HAHAHAHA Hello! HAHAHAHAHA!" Might be Hyoga as he slowly loses his remaining sanity due to constant tormenting and pressure from the demons.

"A A A A- 'Allo/Allow/Arrow" could all imply different things, so I'll give a short on all of them.

"'Allo!" Is just an abbreviation of "Hello."

"Arrow!" -According to a quick google search- is a common symbolism for peace and philosophical ideas, and used for protection and hunting. It could mean that Hyoga just wants peace and quiet, which is enforced by "I just want a peaceful life." in the beginning.

"Allow!" Could mean that the demons are trying even harder to bend him to their will and take him over as a vessel. They want Hyoga to allow them to posses him so they can do whatever they please.

Pabo only has 2 that I can see:

["Nightmare"

"Save (?)ime"]

It might be "time" but I couldn't make out the rune symbol there.

"Nightmare" hardens my thought that Bottom is just a massive nightmare set up by the demons to torment Hyoga, that the song is sung from the perspective of one of the demons (likely Pabo), and that Young Hyoga(tm) in the video is Pabometh playing the part of his repressed/forgotten memories.

This is all assuming the song is, infact, sung by the demons.

Lines from Bottom:

"You're keeping me alive! Today, today, you're killing me!" Could go both ways (Pabo/Sinfan and Hyoga) For Pabo it could just be another variation of the next line I'm about to talk about.

For Hyoga it could mean that he wouldn't be able to function if he didn't have the demons (Sinfan might posses him to make him fit in so nobody notices, keep him from dying from mortal wounds, and he's lived with them so long he might not know what to do without them), but with them he's slowly tearing himself apart from the inside out due to their constant tormenting. Metaphorically or literally is anyone's guess at the moment.

"Autophagy" (his songs name) is a medical term for "self eat" which normally happens when your body is starved, so it eats it's own cells to survive as long as it can. It can also correlate to certain diseases. Autophagy in these terms might also be referring to emotions. It's possible he's been stewing in any sort of negative emotions to cause such effects. (I.E: Guilt, fear, self worth issues,) which could make his resolve weaker, making it easier for Pabo and Sinfan to torment him/possess him. The longer it goes on, the closer he could be to self destructing.

"A wax figure/a doll is keeping me alive/killing me." Is more related to the demons in my eyes. "Wax figure/a doll" is likely referring to Hyoga. Hyoga could be their only tie to the mortal realm, (Sinfan being more prominent because he was summoned first, and by Hyoga himself.)

It could also mean that they need to inhabit his mind/body in order to survive and make it easier to torment Hyoga. If they both are in Hyoga's mind 24/7 while he suffers from nightmares (which cause lack of sleep, keeping his body in a perpetually weak state), no self worth, and a fragile mental state ("I wanna keep you out of my fragile mind!") while he tears himself apart, it would mean it would be harder to stay with him without something happening.

Due to that, it's likely that the very thing keeping them alive and in the mortal realm is also killing them at the same time.

It may be worth mentioning that a line in Bottom is "You think you're a god to me?" while 9lore translated Rinen's (Möbius') tattoo on his chest, which reads "Be still and know that I am god." It could a a coincidence, but I thought I'd mention it just in case (:

Throughout the entire song the demons are mocking and belittling Hyoga. (I.E: "Defying all logic, you're nothing but evil." "You're so stupid! You scumbag, scumbag, scumbag!") Most of the angry rant type of thing happens when Young Hyoga (tm) is on-screen. (It could be a tactic to make Hyoga not want to remember/manipulate his memories/tear down his resolve even more/or just plain upset him.)

"I mean, who, who, who are you?" It's been made clear that for the longest time (according to WOOMA) Hyoga didn't even remember his own name. "Who are you?" might be Pabo trying to get into Hyoga's head and make him question his own sanity.

"What the hell are you to me?" Implies that Pabo also want Hyoga to question why Pabo is here. Sinfan was summoned by Hyoga, but Pabometh was likely summoned by Sinfan to help tear down Hyoga. That means the two don't have much history, and Hyoga most likely doesn't know why Pabo is here for awhile.

It's "you to me" instead of "me to you" so Pabo could also be trying to get Hyoga to try and notice him in a positive way so that the nightmares stop. I'll expand on that some more a few (a lot) of paragraphs down.

"Inside my heart is- such a rage! Such a rage! So I'll grab you, grasp you, and crush you flat!" Is a line I find interesting. It also leads directing into another line; "The symptom of the unforgettable emotion is my burning intent to murder, which is absolutely right." Pabo would likely be talking about Hyoga, which implies that if he could, Pabo would murder Hyoga himself, but since the "wax figure" is needed to keep both him and his accomplice, Sinfan, alive, he can't.

It also implies that Pabo is extremely angry with Hyoga, for a reason I can't particularly pinpoint, except maybe for the fact that Hyoga's becoming more and more unstable and not safe for Pabo and Sinfan. The only problem is, it's Pabo and Sinfans fault he's like that. They're the ones that chose Hyoga as a vessel while simultaneously destroying him.

However, it's possible that Pabo's aim was to devoid Hyoga of anything and everything, (I.E: memories, emotions, etc. etc.) so that he was just that: a vessel. But with Hyoga being so destructive to himself, the whole plan could have gone awry and Pabo's only thought was how furious he was at Hyoga for messing up his chance to be in the mortal realm undetected for good, meaning he wishes he could destroy Hyoga and just get it over with so him and Sinfan could wait until someone else summoned them so they could take advantage of that.

""How deplorable you are! How deplorable you are!"" Is a line that has a chance of Hyoga himself having said it due to it having quotes on it. It also implies that he he could be fighting back, so his resolve might not crushed completely. However, a show of strength like that would likely just enrage Pabometh even more than he already is. It also doesn't help the positive impression he wants Pabo to have of him.

"You're involving yourself with me again like a clingy, clingy neighbor!" Sounds like Pabo, again, insulting Hyoga. If we go off of another part of this fever dream I've cooked up, (Hyoga not knowing what to do without the demons, but with them destroying himself), sounds like Pabo doesn't want to be with Hyoga anymore, going as far as hating him so much he's festering in it.

The "again" makes it sound like Hyoga's tried to communicate with them more than once, being unsuccessful each time. Hyoga could be trying to latch onto them, either to take them down with him or trying to get the nightmares to stop. Like I said, for a while Hyoga could have been trying to get positive attention and make Pabo like him.

"The low-end is going to manipulate me." Could be Pabo addressing that he knows what Hyoga was trying to do and calling him out for it.

"Brimming with momentary anger, rot away quickly, quickly, quickly!" Again, Pabo is talking about his burning hatred for Hyoga.

"I'm always losing! How, how dare you!" Implies that even with all the nightmares and torment, Hyoga has just enough willpower to keep Pabo from getting his wish, angering him even more.

And finally, a line from Autophagy:

"Oh, rise seeds of evil, bursting with malice!" Might be Hyoga finally giving into the demons and becoming their vessel if they take away his painful memories and stop hurting him.

Pentagram:

["-r Guide(A) N(?)E A(?)R"

"The ability to know wh-"

"Grant me the power to be strong in spirit-"

"Grant me the wisdom to understand-"]

With it over Pabo, it's possible that this was the one that summoned Pabo instead of Sinfan, although with it also under Hyoga, it could be Sinfan's. Who knows, it might also be boths.

In the ending scene with the pentagram, the colors of the other songs are visible, meaning that it's possible all of them are connected.

(I could go on for hours about the small loopholes that I think mean all the songs are connected in specific ways. Either way I know they're all from the same universe.)

With all their colors on it, it might mean they all have a demon of their own.

I'm still working slightly on the pentagram, I'll probably keep ya updated if I can find out what the rest of it says (:

If anyone can find the full version (preferably readable) of the pentagram, that'd be lovely (if it even exists)

(If you find more runes in "Bottom" or another Hiiragi song I'd be happy to see if I can translate it (: I'm not very good though, and I can't speak Japanese-)

English translation of Bottom used by: Tackmyn Y (I don't know where you are but you're a lifesaver)

Find any spelling errors, let me know! I'll see if I can fix 'em (:

If you read this far, what're you doing??

Have an absolutely amazing day!!! <3

[twilitty]

Moonlit ch.3

This is the third chapter in my new fic Moonlit, it will be posted on Tumblr, ao3, and ffnet. New chapters uploaded every two weeks. Message/comment to be added to my tag list.

3.4k words

previous chapter

This chapter was not read over by a beta reader, so if you notice any mistakes please let me know in a private message. If you are interested in reading my chapters early and having a hand in the editing process, please let me know via direct message :)

Charlie arrives home from the new doctors household in odd condition. Bella becomes acquainted with a new friend and gets her first driving lesson.

Chapter Three

There’s something oddly comforting about the loud, thunderous engine of my new truck. It successfully blocks out all the thoughts I hope to escape from, and it does so in a way that does not involve the incessant pattering of rain. In fact, it completely eliminates the sound of rain, a miracle I hadn’t thought possible. I can’t imagine I’ll ever manage to repay Jacob for this gift, it means so much more to me than a couple thousand dollars and a way to get around. It’s my escape. 

Charlie had gotten back from the new doctor's household late last night, his eyes bleary with sleep and arms hanging limp by his sides in what can only be described as a dead mans walk. I was used to the posture he held, all slumped over and distracted, as if he had gone on a three day long bender and returned empty of adrenaline and a will to stay awake. Renee had come home from too many “spa-retreats'' with that same form. Dead mans walk, that’s what her friend had called it when I brought it up. “Dead on the outside but more alive than you’ve ever felt on the inside,” she had explained with a distant smile, “awful to watch but beautiful to live out.” 

It was strange to see my father, the stoic police chief, in that position. Perhaps he enjoyed his time at the new doctors house more than he thought he would, perhaps he enjoyed it enough to come in looking prematurely hungover and drained of energy. I wonder if he was drinking, or dancing, or maybe the new family- I blink my eyes hard, squeezing out all the muted light coming from the kitchen window. Stars dance in front of my vision once I open them again. Don’t think of what Charlie was doing there, I tell myself viciously. Please, I add on as an afterthought, as though my subconscious was privy to social niceties. 

The clock on the microwave reads noon hour and my heart stutters. Charlie is still upstairs, dead asleep. He’s the one that wakes me up in the morning, always dressed and with a cup of coffee. But, no, he’s probably just tired from his long shift yesterday and maybe a little hungover. Only a little. In fact, maybe less than a little, maybe he isn’t hungover at all.

Soon, by which I mean no less than two hours after my initial worry over my fathers condition, he emerges from his bedroom and I can hear his footsteps lead into the bathroom. Good, I think, he’s awake before three in the afternoon. That must count for something. Perhaps- My thoughts, aimlessly trying to convince my subconscious that there is no reason for me to worry about the state of my middle-aged father, are interrupted. 

“Bella?” Charlie calls quietly from the top of the stairs. He sounds like he just woke up from a long night out. Hangover voice is something I am very familiar with, although not from first hand experience. Any solace I had reached seconds ago comes crashing down into a pile at my feet.  

I clear my throat, “Down here!” He comes down, feet stepping lightly on each step so as to barely make a noise. He enters the kitchen with a weary look on his face, as if I’m the one acting out of character. “Yeah?”

“What are you doing up so early?” He asks incredulously. I look at the time in the bottom corner of my computer, nearly two in the afternoon. I look back up at him with my eyebrows pinched. 

“Char- Dad, it’s after noon.” My fathers eyes go wide, the whites showing prominently before squeezing down into a harsh blink. He turns to the microwave and his eyes blink violently again. “Dad?”

He doesn’t say anything, but his hands come together at the top of his head, interlacing over the brown hair he passed onto me. “I- I’m getting to work. I’ll see you for dinner.” He mumbles his words, the syllables pouring out into the air without any order. He retreats back upstairs with little more than a squeak on the floorboards, his eyebrows thick over his eyes with worry. The shower turns on quickly and I look back to my computer screen. I have to do some school work, Charlie is a grown man who can take care of himself. 

I brew him a fresh pot of coffee, putting the creamer out on the counter even though I know he takes it black. 

One of my favourite things about Forks, besides my new truck, is the ever present gloom that seems to permeate any mood you had prior to stepping outdoors. It’s like living in a depressive gothic novel written in nineteenth century England. Obsessively torturing the protagonist with dramatic metaphors and the blatant use of personification with inanimate objects like lampshades and tea kettles. I walk outside and my brain fills with run-on sentences about the state of my personal emotional evolution or the true crime of humanity being the amount of introspection that we would require to understand it. Almost compulsively, I assess my morals and the ethical value of my actions as if the rain draws out my inner philosopher. It’s dramatic and moody and unpleasant to experience. 

Yet, I find myself drawn into this trance of deep inner thought and revel in it.

This is what I am doing when I park outfront of The Diner and walk through the front doors. My mind is occupied with drawn out thoughts that sound closer to Shakespeare than a girl who is barely passing her summer courses. My footfalls seem to almost perfectly fall in tune with my thoughts. I wonder if I’m walking funny, I think suddenly with a pointed look at my awkward steps. This is an issue with spending so much time alone in such a gloomy town; you forget other people exist. I pick up the pace of my footfalls and try to let my legs work naturally, but now that I’m aware of my walking I am incapable of walking naturally and feel like an oaf. 

It is while I am walking like an oaf that someone calls out, “Isabella Swan?” My shoulders tense up to my earlobes and suddenly my feet are capable of walking without direction and almost steer me back through the front doors. Instead, I look up from my rough boots and meet the smile of the girl standing behind the counter cutting the large room in half. I try to ignore the stares of the other patrons. 

The girl standing behind the counter looks to be about twenty and has brown hair just past her shoulders, similar to mine except for the fact that hers is shiny with the indication of product and care. A wave of self consciousness rolls over my shoulders, my dull, limp hair is suddenly as bright as a neon sign in the dead of night. “Bella,” I correct her, forcing myself to step up to the counter. “Everybody calls me Bella.” 

She nods knowingly, as if she’s heard this before but just wanted it confirmed. Another wave of self consciousness crashes over me as the possibility of small town gossip arises. Does everybody already know who I am? I don’t like the thought of Charlie telling the town his eccentric ex-wife's daughter is coming to live with him, even if he said it politely. 

“Yeah, that makes sense. Isabella is kinda a mouthful and takes like three whole syllables just to say it.” She shoots a hand across the laminate countertop and exposes a line of white, straight teeth. “I’m Jessica, not Jess,” She clarifies with a sarcastic eye roll. I take her hand, warm and soft, in my own and give it a polite shake before letting go. “Nobody calls me Jess, it sounds like it’s short for Jessie and when I think Jessie I think either golden retriever or blonde surfer dude and I am so not either of those things.” 

“Jessica’s pretty,” I say with possibly a little too much enthusiasm. I haven’t spoken to someone as bubbly as this girl since Phoenix and I am poorly out of practice. 

“She is, isn’t she?” A male voice calls from my right. It’s as if Jessica had spoken it into existence, because suddenly a blond surfer dude- minus the surfer- is sitting only three stools over. 

“No, no,” my face flames and I quickly raise my hands in surrender. “I meant her name.” Then, looking at Jessica I see she’s chewing on her bottom lip and her dark eyebrows are scrunched down. I wonder if she practiced this expression in the mirror, it looks too perfect to be impromptu. “I mean, not that you aren’t pretty,” I clarify and her eyebrows shoot up as the blonde boy snorts. “I mean-” But Jessica raises a hand to stop me from torturing myself any further and drops the lip from between her teeth. “Listen, Bella, I know what you mean you don’t have to run in circles.” She says it in a way that insinuates I’m not the first person to fall into this situation with her. “You aren’t the first girl I’ve wooed with my tragically good looks.” This is not what I expected. The blonde boy snorts again but it sounds more like incredulity than a laugh. I open my mouth to interject, though I’m not sure what I will say, and Jessica widens her eyes at me. “Bella, girl, I’m joking.” 

My mouth widens into an uncomfortable smile that likely looks closer to a grimace. She shakes her head at me with an expression that reads oh Bella even though we’ve only just met. I get the impression that Jessica is an easy person to be friends with and also decide that I will be coming to The Diner more often. “Now,” She says, “What did you order?” 

I recite my order and she pushes open the swinging doors adorned with old license plates and bumper stickers to retrieve it. 

“I’m Mike.” This is from the blonde boy, and he says it with a small wave that very much so indicates that he has lived in this town his whole life. People in big cities, people in Phoenix, don’t wave like that. It’s too small and kind and friendly, there isn’t enough neutrality for him to be from a big city. He’s inviting me into a conversation with the impression that I want to be invited. Small towns and sickly rom coms are the only places where this happens. 

“Bella,” I respond, although he must already have heard me introduce myself to Jessica earlier. “It’s nice to meet you.” I tack on the last part in a likely failed attempt to come across as if I belong. It’s not that I want to be nice or friendly like Mike, it’s just that this will be far less awkward if I at least try to fit in. 

“Likewise.” We lapse into a comfortable silence, or at least he appears to be comfortable in the silence. I am not. My blood seems to have congealed in my veins and is refusing to pump itself into my heart. Am I getting enough oxygen? Yes, yes, I am getting enough oxygen. I know this, but my body does not know this and so instead of trying to formulate some clever comment I try to level out my breathing and suck in as much as possible without seeming weird. 

Three uneven breaths later and Jessica pushes out of the kitchen doors holding a large brown bag with a receipt stapled to the folded lip. She places it in front of me and I take a deep breath, suddenly grateful that my lungs are working and for the delicious smelling food. “I’ll pay with debit?” I don’t mean for it to sound like a question but it does. I can almost hear my mother scolding me, you need to be more assertive. You get stepped on if you’re too polite. I know she’s right but I ignore her anyway. 

“No need, already paid for,” she says with a wide smile. “The cook says hi.” I take it, then, that the cook is the one who paid for my dinner.

“Oh, really that wasn’t necessary.” I produce my debit card from my pocket, holding it out as if it’s perfect evidence of my ability to pay. “I have money.” 

“If you really wanna make it up to me I can take your number.” Renee would like Jessica, she’s assertive. I shake my head a little but still take out my phone and hand it to her. She punches in her number quickly, perfect nails tapping lightly on the screen before handing it back. Her own phone beeps. “Have a nice night, Bella! Text me whenever.” 

I say goodbye to Mike and he waves kindly, almost immediately afterwards turning to talk to Jessica. They wave as I leave and I can feel the eyes of The Diner on my back as I leave the building and enter my truck. 

It’s almost two days until I get a chance to talk with my mother, and within those days I accomplish more than one would expect of a girl who is so well acquainted with procrastination. Namely, I received a text message from Jessica. We conversed lightly, her with heavy use of emojis and me with improper use of punctuation and perhaps not enough enthusiasm. I know this because almost immediately after I send her my reaction to a movie she watched she calls me. 

“Bella,” she says in a tone that insinuates both exasperation and light humour. “I swear, girl, you are so hard to read.” 

“I know, my grammar-”

“No, no,” she cuts me off. “I mean I have no idea if you even wanna talk to me or not.” I’m shocked into silence, of course I want to talk to her. I enjoy talking to her. It seems I’ve been severely lacking in the friends department and it’s no recent issue. Ever since Phoenix I’ve remained forcibly independent, it’s nice to have people my age to talk to. 

“I- I can use more emojis?” It comes out a question and my mother is back in my head, assertive assertive assertive. Jessica gives a triumphant laugh and I get the impression that this was her goal all along. “Okay, okay, I get it. I’ll try to communicate better.” 

She just laughs and we hang up and continue texting, but not before she informs me that we will have to set up a schedule to meet in person. Apparently even with emojis in my armoury I am “more fun” in person. Who would have thought?

Within the two days before I call my mother I also get my first driving lesson with Jacob Black. He drives over in his fathers old truck, which he can no longer use due to the wheelchair. Jacob informs me of this with a smile that tells me he’s inherited the truck.

He bounces out of the vehicle with a giant grin on his face and his hands clasped excitedly behind his back. I could all but feel the excitement radiating off of him in waves. He had come prepared too, as I later found out, when he inserted a CD into my cars radio system. Soft rock echoed sweetly throughout the cab and Jacob drummed his fingers over his knees. “You gotta love ‘em, right?” He asked redundantly. I nodded, not knowing who I had to love or why, but just enjoying sitting next to him and listening to him talk. 

He walked me through the gear shift. It sticks when you move directly from park to reverse, so I should always pause on drive for a moment first. We practice this in the driveway a few times before taking to the residential streets. We mostly talk during the drive, him giving me all the Rez gossip and me providing him with the meek details of my online school experience and my conversations with Jessica. 

“She’s really nice,” I tell him as the trucks engine growls loudly at the stop light. “Loud, but loud in a nice way.” He nods in the passenger seat as if he completely understands, which I do not find difficult to believe. I wouldn’t be surprised if everybody in town was his friend. 

“Yeah, I know a few people like that.” I’m proven correct. “Like there are just so many things going on inside them they can’t contain it.” I nod absently but my mind shifts to the first part of Jacobs comment. I wonder how many friends he has? I can’t imagine he’s unpopular, or even shy, he’s just too exciting and fun. His smile makes me want to smile. 

“What?” He enunciates slowly with a slow head turn. I look away quickly, my eyes steadily focused on the bumper in front of us. I didn’t mean to stare at him. 

“Nothing.” 

“No, what?” I pull into the next lane, making sure to check over my shoulder twice. Maybe if I don’t pay attention to him, maybe if I just ignore- “Is there something on my face?” 

I look over, baited into meeting his eyes. A big palm runs over his mouth and he pulls it back as if to inspect it for markings. “No,” I assure him. “There’s nothing on your face.” Then, my lips widen as if with a mind of their own, and suddenly I’m grinning. “I mean other than-”

He guffaws out a laugh before I can finish my comment and looks over at me with a smile mirroring my own. “Bella Swan, were you about to make a joke?” I shoot him a half-hearted glare and realize that this is all too easy with him. Jacob is like an overactive puppy, so easy to excite and quick to make you smile. I also realize that I seem to really enjoy the company of this particular overactive puppy. 

“I make jokes plenty of times,” I retort with a quick glance in my rearview mirror. The houses have transitioned into a tree line and the previously residential road boasts a higher speed limit. “You most definitely do not. I remember being kids, you were always the sensible one.” My heart skips and my field of vision narrows to the space above the steering wheel. The road is slick with rain, I doubt I’ll ever see it dry. “You used to ask Charlie to put bandaids in your little backpack, just in case…” his words continue, detailing how mature I was for a first grader. I made decisions way past my age and was the first one to disinfect surface cuts and scrapes. I was the only one to disinfect bloody knees and palms, even though the sight made me sick. “It was like you just had to take care of everybody else.” 

He looks over to me, I can see him in my peripheral vision, but instead of looking back I force my lips into an open smile. I hope it comes across as genuine. “I had a thing for first aid.” It’s a poor response. Anybody could see through my shallow sentence and many people would call me out on it. Tell me that for a girl with such a large vocabulary it’s odd for me to suddenly have nothing to say. For a girl who claims to enjoy this boys company I seem to be going out of my way to deter him from ever calling me again. 

“Take a left up here,” Jacob says and his hand juts out to point at a beaten gravel road. It cuts into the forest at a haggard angle which makes it nearly impossible to maneuver, but I do so with more than minimal effort and release a heavy breath once we are on it. “Okay, now try to merge back onto the road.”

“What?” The odd, and clearly impossible, request pulls me out of my self-pitying thoughts. “Jake-” 

“If you can’t do it that’s fine, just switch seats and I’ll drive.” The devilish glint in his eyes provokes some deep, hidden piece of me that craves competition. 

“You just miss Betty,” I say with perhaps a little too much vindication. He doesn’t seem bothered either way and simply shrugs his large shoulders, the russet skin reflecting the light of another car's headlights as it passes on the main road. 

“Yeah, I do.”

taglist:

@musingsofvenus​ @maybesandohnos​

[comicbookuniversity]

How Black Lagoon Begins Attacking Gender Norms

by Bunnypwn Gold

Rei Hiroe’s Black Lagoon is one of the most intelligent, fun, and kinetic action-crime dramas around. The entire series looks and feels like an action movie; even the way it’s structured feels more akin to a series of movies, with different self-contained arcs building off of the previous installments. While many action movies include philosophical elements and dialogue in an attempt to make the festival of blood and explosions seem more intelligent without exploring the issues, Black Lagoon actively builds its themes and the substance of its plot and character arcs around its stellar action-hero philosophy quotes. One of its strongest points is how integral all the characters’ social identities are to the way the story is told. Chief among these is the way gender is explored and examined. Looking through the first five stories of the series, a powerful message about breaking out of the toxic gender binary is developed, creating an argument that drives the rest of the series. This argument is never made explicitly, but instead through the pattern of behaviors exhibited by Japanese salaryman Rock, as the feminine, and hotshot gunslinger Revy, as the masculine.

For anyone who has not read the series, a little catch-up is in order. At the beginning, Okajima Rokuro, a generic Japanese salaryman, is kidnapped by Revy, the gunhand of Lagoon Traders, a company of underworld couriers. Rokuro was in possession of a disc the Lagoon Traders were hired to steal, and Revy wanted to sweeten the pay with some ransom. During a shootout with mercenaries hired by Rokuro’s company and a chase to certain death, Rokuro goes from wanting to return to his ordinary life, to finding out his bosses are planning to let him die, and finally to diving into the underworld as a crewman aboard the Black Lagoon, taking up the nickname Rock. He then spends the first few stories of the series being taught how to perform basic duties and tasks aboard the torpedo boat by Revy until they have a falling out and make up after a dramatic argument. It is this series of events that sets up the larger dialogue on gender in the rest of the series.  

In an interview published for Sunday GX magazine and printed in volume 8, series author Rei Hiroe and Gen Urobuchi, author of the Black Lagoon novelization, discuss their views on gender in light of the series’ myriad badass women. In it, Urobuchi is quoted as saying,

“I naturally have this idea that women are strong or tough. Like men are just male bees—creatures that should die after they ejaculate…In that sense men are weak. Whereas the battle begins for women once they get pregnant…Women have to keep fighting. I don’t see that kind of strength as cute. I can’t dote on it.”

Later on, when discussing the final scene of The Wild Bunch, in which the heroic cowboys go off to their deaths trying to save their friends, Hiroe and Urobuchi have the following exchange:

Hiroe: “They’re already dead at that point. That’s what’s so cool. They have no intention of getting out alive.”

Urobuchi: “That’s really the only moment men can compete with women, I think. There’d have to be a third world war for men to shine. Like a Mad Max type of world. Maybe only when there’s a real danger of extinction will men have a role. Right now this society could exist only with women.”

This lays out the core of the series’ argument about gender: women are strong because they fight to live and make life, whereas men place all their value on their own deaths and the deaths of others, and the current gender binary denies women their strength and forces them into submission with the violence of death-based masculinity. This is somewhat familiar, since associations between the genders and life and death in this vein are common across cultures. What is particularly instructive for how the series is constructed is how the machismo, male-dominant view of gender is embedded in action movies, particularly cowboy movies. For anyone who has read Black Lagoon, it’s clear how powerful an influence cowboy and other action movies have on the series.

Rock spent his life as a low-level employee in a large Japanese company. Like most companies around the world, large Japanese corporations like the one Rock worked for are male-dominated and are typified by traditional ideals of masculinity, with the CEO and board of directors, among others, working in the role of powerful, great men, and everyone under them working their way closer to that great ideal of manhood. Rock, being so low in the company, is far from manhood, in that sense; he describes his job as mostly consisting of bowing to superiors, and his general conciliatory, subservient attitude throughout the early part of the series can easily be read as traditionally feminine. From that perspective, his time at that company can be read as emasculating (for more on the idea of emasculating corporate culture and men trying to take back their manhood with violence, see Fight Club). Rock even reveals that he would blow off steam at a batting cage, which is a notably phallic activity, with bats and balls, and, being a sport-based hobby, is more traditionally masculine by nature; in a sense, after constantly kissing ass and being forced to get drunk to keep his bosses happy, he recharged his masculinity by knocking his stress into the far end of the cage.

Revy, on the other hand, fits perfectly into macho-violent cowboy movie masculinity during the first set of stories. If she had been replaced by a man, then superficially the story could have been told the same way, with the only difference being that Rock would likely have been a little less shocked to see Two Hand smile while he killed all those mercenaries. She’s short-tempered, mean, constantly looks out for herself before anyone else, and is just so indignant that she has to take orders from anyone. She’s greedy and aggressive and takes great joy in both risking her life and taking the lives of others. Throughout the first few stories, Revy often complains that every little thing Rock does wrong costs her money, and she’s not particularly generous with her own. Though she continues this throughout the rest of the series, and so it isn’t specific to this period, the fact that Revy is most often seen in her downtime looking at porno magazines promising the largest-breasted women around drives home the kind of macho, hypermasculine role she fills. We later learn that she grew up on the streets of NYC, having to run from street criminals and violent police officers. She would take up the gun at age 11 and begin emulating the only kind of power she knew up to that point: the violent men who terrorized her. Her worldview is defined by this dog-eat-dog attitude, with people being nothing more than dead bodies waiting to happen and profit from. She’s so scared of showing vulnerability and anything that could be seen as feminine because the last time she was vulnerable and feminine, she was nearly killed in the gutter by dirty cops.

The pilot chapter of the series sets out to demonstrate the gendered positions of Rock and Revy. Revy starts off the chapter by messing up her boss Dutch’s plan by kidnapping Rock for extra cash. She is then indignant when Dutch reprimands her for this, because she was trying to take initiative and be independent, masculine qualities often praised at companies such as the one Rock worked for. Rock spends all his time whining, or as Revy calls it, “bitching,” about what’s going on, being very demanding, and wanting everyone to take care of everything for him, all of which puts him in a stereotypically feminine role, and a negative one at that. At the bar, Revy belittles Rock’s manhood for drinking beer, saying rum “is what a real man drinks,” and ends up in a drinking contest, because Rock has to prove he’s a man despite his feminine role and Revy, as a “real man,” can’t back down. Revy then demonstrates her penchant for and love of violence as she kills a bunch of the EO mercenaries hired by Rock’s company to kill them and retrieve the disc, just living her best life. The turn for Rock in this chapter is when he talks to his boss and finds out he plans to let Rock die; the company leaders will reward his death with their presence at his funeral, showing the masculine value of death and the power of the executives’ masculinity that their presence is meant to be that great a reward. As the mercenaries chase the Lagoon into the straits, Revy demonstrates her masculine lack of regard for her own life by nonchalantly resigning herself to death. Rock, on the other hand, embraces the opportunity to take up the masculinity his company denied him by devising an insane plan to win the day. After coming out on top and choosing to join the Lagoon, however, that masculinity starts to change for Rock. By choosing to join the Lagoon, Rock was choosing that as his way of life, not simply the place he was willing to die. For Revy’s part, it’s easy to read the way she relishes her part in Rock’s plan as a cowboy choosing to die how she lived, but it can also be read as her accepting a way to fight to stay alive in the way she sees best, which is itself an important turn for Revy. These points are developed further in the rest of the opening of the series.

Throughout the next four stories, Rock remains at the low end of the totem pole, still receiving his training and unsure of how he will actually make his living on the Lagoon, placing him in a similarly feminine position as he was in as the errand boy in a large corporation. Revy emphasizes this with her masculine sense of inherent authority, constantly bossing Rock around and belittling him for failing to learn sailing knots faster or not checking his scuba gear thoroughly. Revy also buys Rock a Hawaiian shirt, which is never seen because Rock refuses to wear it. While buying clothes for a man may be seen as feminine, it more resembles Revy trying to institute a work uniform, since she got it to replace the semi-formal work clothes Rock still wears; it should be noted that Benny, the Lagoon’s engineer and another man who takes a passive position in the crew, wears a Hawaiian shirt. Revy’s masculine position is further solidified in Ring-Ding Ship Chase, the second story, when she single-handedly took out several motorboats filled with heavily-armed men and mounted with machine guns. Rasta-Blasta, the third story, pushes in another direction, with Revy taking a masculine approach to watching over Garcia, the young boy they’re transporting for sale, by threatening to beat and kill him when he won’t comply with orders. Revy’s role can be read as either paternal disciplinarian or like a cowboy angry because kids, which she never wanted, cramp her style. Rock takes on the maternal role in how he deals with Garcia in that story, being more gentle and nurturing. Later on, Rock tries to stop Revy and ass-kicking terrorist-turned-maid Roberta from fighting to the death partly in an attempt to protect them as women, because he still thinks like how things work in Japan. But of course, Revy has to fight Roberta, because, as a “real man,” she can’t stop before things are settled.

Die Rückkehr des Alders, the fourth story, represents the major turning point in this opening arc. During their mission to salvage a Nazi painting from a sunken German sub, Revy leaves Rock behind for a moment to take medals and things from the dead soldiers so she can make a little extra money on the side. Rock takes a stand, saying she should leave them behind. While taking a stand can be read as masculine, Rock does so in defense of what the medals meant to the soldiers, and how those sentiments are more valuable than whatever money can be made from them, essentially taking a feminine position in support of life and love. The fact that Rock backs down by the end is what really does in any hope of this being a masculine moment for Rock. Revy, on the other hand, lays out the bare bones of her cowboy “we’re dead men walking” mentality, pushing herself further into the macho corner. Here is where she reveals what her childhood was like and argues that the bones in the sub and the medals were essentially the same: just things. There’s no value in things like sentiment, which people build lives around. She’s literally placing monetary value on the deaths of Nazi soldiers, the starkest version of her masculinity. She continues when raiding the neo-Nazi ship by killing everyone she sees, including the hired staff who were unaffiliated with the neo-Nazis. When she kills them, she doesn’t have her usual smile, a sign of how her desire to remain in this powerful role is stressing her, how it’s not really bringing her a happy life.

The big conclusion happens in the follow-up story Calm Down Two Men, which sees Revy and Rock going on a simple errand run and then getting lunch. During the errand run, both demonstrate their typical patterns of behavior. Rock is more submissive, just trying to get along, and Revy is aggressive and angry, using violence as her way of handling business. Their roles here play out fine enough with the first two errands, but Revy nearly gets them into a shootout at the Rip-Off Church before Rock saves the day with some diplomacy. Revy is put on edge as Sister Yolanda tells Revy to learn from Rock, which would disrupt her status and position in multiple ways. At lunch, they get into an argument which ultimately dispels the tension left between them after their time in the sub. It is instigated by Rock, who is taking a stand for his principles, a stand that demonstrates his new masculinity. Revy tries to take control back quickly by threatening to shoot Rock dead, since she refuses to be put onto the defensive, which she would interpret as a weak, vulnerable feminine position. Rock redirects the gun and later takes a punch without flinching to show that he can’t be stopped with violence. Rock speaks here about how he got by at work before, and how Revy inspired him by showing how much more he could have in life. This scares Revy, putting her on the defensive, to hear someone demonstrate how hollow and insignificant the power she was wielding truly was. Eventually, Revy sees that Rock is actually offering her something more powerful in exchange and takes him up on it. To sum up Rock’s offer, “Well, if there aren’t any Robin Hoods…then BE a Robin Hood,” meaning take a stand for the principles you want to uphold in life. Before the chapter is out, Revy asks Rock if he’s with her or against her, just like in the sub, in an attempt to place her new path near her familiar ground. Rock doesn’t allow her that simplicity.

In this way, the two switch places in their gender roles by the conclusion of this opening arc, but do so in a way that breaks them free from the stereotypical gender binary. Just as Urobuchi put it, Rock has fully formed his new, life-affirming masculinity by the end of the argument, while Revy is only just starting to chart the course of her new, powerful femininity; to complete the parallel to sex described by Urobuchi, Revy and Rock smoke after their fight and “kiss” their cigarettes to light Revy’s. The argument fully demonstrates how the old gender binary our heroes left behind was damaging to each of them, with Rock left emasculated and, more importantly, unable to live life his own way because of how he always came up short of expectations, and Revy being a tightly-wound ball of self-destructive anger and violence doomed to leave this world without having really gotten anything out of it. Overall, it’s a clever, subtle, and effective way to demonstrate why traditional gender roles are harmful and degrading to all involved. While, as a nonbinary person, I have to point out it still is based on a binary view of gender, it’s still an interesting way to demonstrate how breaking free from the traditional gender binary is empowering and can redefine the course of a person’s life for the better.

[tessatechaitea]

Justice League #2 (1987)

I didn't know Orgazmo was in this comic book.

Once again, I'm surprised by how quickly an old comic book I read years ago gets to some of the stories I think of as major story arcs. These pseudo-Marvel heroes on the cover are the precursor to The Extremists whom I remember as major antagonists to this team. I don't know if The Extremists appear any time soon though. First, the Justice League have to deal with these peaceniks. Only after they've become allies with Blue Jay and Bald Thor and Brown Scarlet Witch do the Extremists finally come to destroy Earth. The issue begins with Kevin Maguire going, "Look at these lips. You like these lips and this mouth. Well, you're gonna get lots of them! Even Maxwell Lord gets some lovely pouty face slugs!"

I'm sorry for referring to lips as "face slugs."

Batman's main goal is to get to the bottom of how Doctor Light became a member of his League. He'd already hired Black Canary so why would he need another woman in the group? Isn't a ratio of eight men to one woman good enough?! I'm counting Oberon in the number of men just to make it seem even more lopsided. Although Doctor Fate has already ditched (and will become a woman soon anyway, right?!) so, not including Oberon, that makes the ratio six to one! Getting better! Plus add Doctor Light since she was on the cover and has somehow forced her way in, a ratio of six to two! That's three to one if you reduce it! Which is practically one to one if you squint and put your fingers in your ears and go, "Nyah nyah nyah! Everything is already equal! Why are women fighting for more than they already have?!" Anyway, my point was: Fucking Batman. What a monster!

I wouldn't think a sleeveless vest with a wacky collar layered on top of a turtle neck with elbow length white gloves would look so cool!

I prefer to concentrate on Guy's outfit rather than his misogyny and lack of intelligence and terrible haircut. In this issue is an advert for the all new Dr. Fate four issue mini-series by Giffen and DeMatteis. So that solves the mystery of why he was sort of included in the first issue. He was basically a commercial. Jack Ryder's gossip television show has been trying to portray the new Justice League in a negative light because that's the kind of reporting that gets eyeballs and raises revenue. Maybe if people's lives weren't so boring, they wouldn't eat up all that hot take drama shit from people like Jack Ryder and Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson and Laura Ingraham. I suppose I shouldn't wonder how rational people watch that shit because most people, rational or not, are just looking for somebody to repeat their inner views back to them. And Fox News has honed that ability to a razor edge. Sometimes I imagine Sean Hannity doesn't believe the stupid shit he comes up with but then I remember my high school and college friend Soy Rakelson and I think, "Oh yeah. He actually believes that shit."

I recently found this letter by Soy from our college paper. It's been in my head since 1994 when I could not fucking believe he wrote it. Poor, poor discriminated Soy, self-declared "Defender of Western Civilization."

One small note about Soy: maybe a month or two after Trump became president, he quietly disappeared from Facebook for good. I won't speculate on why but I suppose if I spent some time trying, I'd probably come up with his actual reasoning. After Guy throws another tantrum that has to be quelled by Batman, Doctor Fate gets a scene of his own! I guess he didn't completely disappear from the comic book. At least not yet. Although, if Doctor Fate sticks around for a dozen or more issues, I'm going to feel even more shitty than I already feel about my memory. Doctor Fate visits some purple haired guy who sees everything as gray and warns him to take back up his destiny. I don't know who it is. The only purple haired character I remember is Pariah. But what is his destiny other than to watch worlds burn? Also, he has other selves across the world reaching into people's souls. Is he Jim Corrigan? I have no idea! Meanwhile, Blue Jay, Wandjina, and Silver Sorceress (whose costume is brown), from Earth-Marvel-Parodies (or some other new world, I suppose. In 1987, there was just one Earth left, right?), are busy dismantling Bialya's nuclear arsenal. Bialya is one of DC's evil countries. Sometimes you don't want to write a story that exists in a gray world; you just want pure black and white, good and evil. When that's the case, you have the heroes battle Bialyans! Blue Jay and friends are here to rid the Earth of all their nuclear weapons so as to save it from the fate that befell their homeworld. The leader of Bialya sees an opportunity for mischief and power and the destruction of America, so he greets them with open arms. Rumaan Harjavti, the leader of Bialya, teams up with Blue Jay and Friends to help guide them to other nations who have nuclear weapons that need to be disposed of. The first country he sends them to is Israel. Probably because it's close by and not because he has ulterior racist motives. Guy Gardner hears the news and is thrilled because he gets a boner imagining a world where only Ronald Reagan has control over a nuclear arsenal.

When he first mentioned Ronnie, I thought it was a mistake. I forgot how old this comic book is!

Batman is all, "We're going to stop these peaceniks from making the world a safer place!" Because if there's one story that can't be told enough it's the one where we all learn a lesson about how the ends do not justify the means, no matter how amazing the ends will be and how messy the means are. I suppose the ends justify the means if the means are compassionately thought out and done with respect for all parties' opinions! So maybe sometimes the ends justify the means? Or does the statement not work that way because the point is that you can't just make that blanket statement. Like, do you murder five million people to save one little girl's life? Probably not! Or do I have it completely wrong and everybody thinks the ends do justify the means? Anyway, Batman doesn't think world peace should be achieved through the destruction of other people's dangerous property. It's basically the same story that season one of Stargirl just told. The Injustice Society of America wants to make the world a leftist dreamscape but at the cost of 25 million lives or something. And the Justice Society is all, "Well, we really like your manifesto. We agree with all of these points. But maybe the cost is too high?" So in the end, I was left supporting the Injustice Society of America because I guess I believe the ends do justify the means?! Also, I'm fairly certain I don't like a quarter of the population so good riddance? But also maybe the entire season of Stargirl was some sort of anti-leftist parable about how you have to let people come to their own decisions about saving the world because forcing them to get on board is rude and it's better if climate change destroys the world than to force one person to believe that manmade climate change is an actual thing? I had philosophical whiplash by the end of Stargirl season one. One character is all, "Murder is wrong!" and then goes and murders somebody and another character is all "I need revenge because this monster killed my parents!" and then he gets all merciful and lets Solomon Grundy go so he can kill other parents and the Injustice Society is all, "We'll kill indiscriminately to make the world a better place for our rich white kids!" and then their all, "A lot of rich white people's kids are going to die from our plan but that's okay because they're not ours." Also, the worst part of the show, the part of the show that I cannot forgive, is how they introduced us to Doctor Mid-Nite's sad owl back at the abandoned JSA headquarters and Luke Wilson is all, "Yeah, he's just waiting for Doctor Mid-Nite to return. It's sad, right? He just hangs out here alone super sad." And then Beth becomes the new Doctor Mid-Nite and you keep expecting the owl to befriend her but the owl never appears, ever again. Every episode, when the sad owl didn't appear onscreen, I was reminded of the sad owl. So every minute of every episode, I kept thinking, "Is the owl going to befriend Beth now?" And nothing. The season ends with the sad owl still super sad and all alone and fuck the writers and showrunners for that. I suppose they couldn't afford a CGI owl after ejaculating all of their CGI money on the five minute Solomon Grundy fight. I just digressed so much I need to take a shower.

Guy and I are in 99.5% agreement about the dismantling of nuclear weapons. That last bit is where he thinks the U.S.A. should get to keep theirs.

Everybody treats Guy Gardner like his argument isn't even worth listening to but they're all wrong! They're just treating him like a dumb jerk! Sure, I agree that the Justice League just can't take it upon themselves to rid the world of all nuclear weapons. I mean, do I?! Hmm. I'm not so sure I do agree with that! If Superman really cared about Earth, shouldn't he martyr himself by becoming the biggest criminal in the history of the entire world by destroying all nuclear weapons against the will of every nation that has them?! There are plenty of other planets in the DCU that he could go live on after becoming a giant Earth menace! Can't he even make that small sacrifice for the safety of his homeworld?! And if his actions cause some kind of horrible repercussions that cause the world to spiral into chaos, he can probably just blame Batman. Silver But Really Brown Sorceress questions if what they're doing is right. Bald Thor says, "In the end they'll thank us. And even if they don't, at least they'll be alive to hate us." See?! That's what I just said about Superman! He should totally take that bullet! That was not a tasteless George Reeves joke and even if somebody read it that way, it's been like a hundred years since his death! Blue Jay and Friends tell each other their origin story as they remember how their world was destroyed by nuclear weapons and how they decided to interfere with everybody else's lives because of it. I think their origin was supposed to make me see their side of things and feel empathy for them but it totally made me rethink their position and now I totally think they need to be stopped. Because I was fine when I thought the argument was "Destroy all nuclear weapons to save Earth." But I dislike the argument, "Something bad happened to me and now I have to make sure it never happens to anybody else no matter how annoying I make myself!" It's like when somebody's dumb kid gets hit by a bus while riding their bike and then they have to get a law passed making it illegal for busses to run over kids and to name the law after their kid and to get politicians who support the law because it doesn't really change anything (being that busses running over kids was probably already frowned upon if not illegal) but it's good press and makes it look like they're doing something. Then after the dumb law is passed, the parents of the dumb kid can say things like, "My baby didn't die in vain!" Even if that's totally untrue and their baby did die in vain and the law never actually makes the world a better place at all. Guy rushes in to stop Blue Jay and Friends all alone but fails because writers can't reward brash arrogant heroes who are mostly just big jerks. It would be unseemly.

So far, I've liked the bits with Captain Marvel but I'm still weirded out that he's a little boy in a grown man's muscular body.

Blue Jay and Friends fly into Bialyan airspace and the Justice League have to back off. But they'll get another chance to stop Blue Jay and Friends next issue when Blue Jay and Friends try to disarm Russia! Justice League #2 Rating: B+. It gets too complicated when super heroes bump up against the wall of political conflicts. When Batman points out that the Justice League can't chase Blue Jay and Friends into Bialyan airspace without creating an international incident, some readers might start questioning how super heroes can act even within the borders of one specific country! Surely every time they commit their vigilantism, they're creating a domestic incident! Don't make me start asking questions about the fundamental nature of masked people doing whatever the fuck they think is justice without the consent of any kind of laws or political powers, comic book! This is too heady for my tastes! I guess the whole point is to eventually have the Justice League backed by the United Nations so that the reader can think, "Okay, right. So they have the authority to do whatever they want now if I'm willing to believe the United Nations has any real authority at all!" And then the reader goes on to prove the moon landing never happened and that Project Cloverleaf rains human excrement down on our heads on a daily basis for some kind of Nazi experimentation.

[wheremytwinwatches]

[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 8

Happy birthday, Tephi! Sorry I was gone for a bit guys, work was kicking my butt for a while there. But we’re out of holiday season, and it looks like we may actually get another full-timer on my team! Anyways, where did we leave off again? Ah. Right. The whole “Stones are Soul Gems” thing. Guh. And Ed’s off exploring an “abandoned” lab, while some psycho with a knife is attacking Al.

Episode 08: “The Fifth Laboratory” Al looks up as the rooftop psycho (captioned as [66]) completely ruins the element of surprise with a battlecry. Well, given his heavy armor and the fanged skull-helmet, guessing that subtlety isn’t one of Mr. 66’s strong suits. Al jumps back and avoids the wild swings of 66’s machetes, to which the pfffahahaha ok hold up. I’m sorry, but he’s just so… pudgy! This 66 dude is a marshmallow, perfect example of acrofatic with the rooftop leap. Anyways, Pudgy compliments Al’s speed for someone of his size. Then follows the compliment by saying a lesser fighter wouldn’t be worth the effort to cut down. Right, masked psycho. Can’t let his adorable fluffiness distract me. 66 explains that he got the name from “them” when he came to work at the lab, and that he’s going to cut Al up nice and neat. So just sit back and scream, m’kay? Yeah, good luck with that, buddy. Inside Ed’s looking at a large Transmutation Circle in an open room, with a small pillar in the center. Said TC looks rather simple compared to the ones we’ve seen so far, is that really all that’s needed to make a Stone? Well, the TC and the noticeable red stains spaced around the five points. Ed makes the same assumption I did, and another voice confirms his suspicion. Said voice is a rather refined-sounding 48, another armored dude with glowing red eyes (like the Goths?) who says he’s in charge of guarding the lab from curious brats. Bit more back-and-forth between the two before Ed makes an arm blade, 48 (nickname Pompous) notes that he’s an Alchemist and WHOA he’s right in front of Ed already. Threat estimation just went way up. Yikes, and he’s already deduced that Ed has an automail arm. Pompous is proving to be pretty good. But Ed gets a stab in and- *clank*? Oh. OH. Wait a minute. He’s hollow? Like Al? But that implies… Ok, video’s paused for a moment. Getting some seriously bad implications here. We know souls can be bound to armor, our boy Al’s liv- well, existing proof of that. And if a non-certified child performing amateur Alchemy can do that, who’s to say a bunch of immoral scientists can’t? Take a lab designed to turn death into a power source, and siphon off a couple of the condemned to make immortal, nigh-impervious to harm guards for your sick manufacturing process. And why stop at just a few guards? Build up a friggin army of the things! Who’s gonna stop you? The genocidal government? You’re either working for them or you are them! Oh Leto, this is gonna end up with our boys having to face down armies of pseudo-Als, isn’t it? Cripes. Back to the fight, really really hoping that my theory is wrong. Buuuut nope, Ed confirms that’s the sound he hears when sparring with Al. Pompous reintroduces himself as the guy numbered 48 on death row, more commonly known as Slicer. Mass murderer, y’know. Pompous doesn’t confirm that the place was used to make Philosopher’s Stones, it not being “his area”, but he does reveal his Seal in his helmet, helpfully notes that if Ed destroys it, then the fight is Ed’s. Awfully considerate, although he says that he likes a challenge now and then. And he won’t just let Ed walk away, it’d totally ruin his mass-murderer rep. On to the fight! ...Hughes, you’d better have a good reason to interrupt the fight between our Protagonist and the Soul-Bound Mass Murderer. Yes, it’s adorable how happy you are that your daughter’s about to turn 3, but there are things going on! Roy agrees with me. Stop using a military line on military time to gush over your family! Hughes finally returns to more pressing matters, namely a certain scar-faced Ishvalan. They found bodies at the destroyed bridge, but they’re all so decomposed that they can’t be identified. Hold up, regardless of the fact that he’s clearly alive still, what do you mean by bodies? As in multiple? I count nine sheets there, where did they all come from? And why decomposed? The fight wasn’t that long ago. Although there’s no concrete evidence he’s dead, lack of sightings means Command thinks that he’s dead. So it should be ok to remove the Elric Brother’s guards soon. Said unfortunate guards have just found the empty room where their charges are supposed to be. [Brosh]: “Ah! Major Armstrong’s gonna take his shirt off again and yell at us some more, isn’t he?!” While Brosh sobs, Ross takes charge and orders him to follow to the only place they could have gone. To the Fifth Laboratory! Lots of yelling and grunting as Pompous and Ed swing at each other. But there’s a shift in gears? Ooooh crud. Ed’s arm is breaking, the increase in chrome and resulting weakness means it’s not holding up as well. Sure, it won’t rust as easily, but he’ll be too dead to enjoy that. Fight’s taken a shift in Pompous’ favor, where before they were equally matched now the Soul-Armor’s just standing, blocking while barely moving and then kicking Ed away. Pompous is all sad that Ed won’t last much longer, tired and wounded as he is. Not to mention that his partner’s likely finished with Ed’s companion outside. After all, 66 is quite strong. But not as strong as Pompous, of course. Ed finds this quite funny. See, he and Al have been sparring partners for quite some time. And to this day, he’s never beaten his little brother. Cut to outside, where Pudgy is getting his skullface handed to him. Or rather, knocked clean off. No sign of his Seal, though. Pudgy offers to share his story with Al, all starting with a man named Barry. Barry appears to be a butcher, given the artwork of a guy with a cleaver surrounded by meat. Barry the Butcher did so love cutting up meat into tiny little pieces. Until one day that wasn’t enough anymore, and he took his cleaver to the streets. 23 victims later, Barry was sent to the gallows. But then some dumbass decided that such a man would do just fine as an unpaid nightguard. Anyways, that was the story of the infamous serial killer Barry the Chopper! [Al]: “Sorry, I’ve never heard of you.” Barry/Pudgy does not take Al’s lack of local history well. Nor his lack of surprise to the whole “bodiless armor” thing. And then he’s surprised when Al calmly pops his own helmet off. Really, dude? The glowing red eyes didn’t clue you in? Heh. Oh man, poor Pudgy. You have no idea who you’re messing with. Wait. Why are you laughing? Oh. You DICK. [66]: “Are you sure that you’re not a puppet created and controlled by your so-called brother? Were you ever a real person to begin with?” Nope. Nope nope nope. Shut up. You do not get to ask those questions. You do not get to imply that Al wasn’t a real boy. That his memories were created to make him easier to control. That dear sweet Granny and Winry are just playing along to manipulate a “living” weapon. I was looking forward to seeing our boys take you down, murderer. Now I’m looking forward to them doing it slowly. Leto. First Soul Gems, now the whole issue of sapience and continuation of consciousness? This show’s not pulling any punches, is it? Um, cop? You may wanna well ok he’s dead. “I kill, therefore I am. As long as I know that, it’s all I need to prove to myself that I’ve always been me.” Back inside, Pompous is saying that he’ll finish off Ed quickly to go and fight the better fighter. Alright Ed, what’s your plan? Good plan! And shame on you, Pompous. You talked a big talk, but you really fell for the old “look behind you” trick. [48]: “That was dirty!” [Ed]: “There’s no such thing as ‘dirty’ in a fight. Before he destroys the seal, Ed stops to pick up Pompous’ helmet and demands what he knows about the Philosopher’s Stone. And just leaves the main body of Pompous behind him. Really, Ed? You’ve lived with Al for how many years? Seen his head get knocked off yet he still moves just fine how many times? Shame on you. Wait, what? “Impossible?” Why? You clearly saw the seal on the neck, right? Ooooh. “Slicer” was a pair of brothers? Independent head and body? So Ed was shown a seal inside the helmet, not the one lower down on the armor proper. And now he’s really injured, Armor-Slicer’s not giving him time to transmute (point for having the seal already on some gear, rather than using your hands each time). Ouch, jab to the cut and Ed’s down. Memory of Scar? OOOOOOOHHHHHH! Ed figured out Scar’s Hand o’ Doom! Armor-Slicer done got blown in half! And then freaks Ed out by wriggling. Ha! Pompous takes the defeat in fairly-good grace, calls for Ed to deal the finishing blow. But Ed’s not going to commit murder. [48]: “With bodies like these are we really even people?” [Ed]: “I consider you people whether you have physical bodies or not… If I didn’t, that would mean I didn’t believe my own brother is a person either.” Outside Pudgy continues to prey on Al’s doubts, goes so far as to dare him to break his own Blood Seal. Obviously Al won’t do such a stupid thing, but it’s because we know that he’s alive, not because he’s “programmed” to protect it. Guh, the sooner Pudgy bites it the better. Ed continues to insist that he won’t kill another person. Which amuses Pompous? Wow. Pompous remarks that it’s ironic, saying it wasn’t until they were Soul Bound that he and his brother were treated like humans. For that kindness, he’ll tell Ed everything. Awesome, we’re getting- aw crap. I know that dress. Ladies and gentlemen. Lust is on the scene. And she does not like helmets with loose lids. And Envy, as well. This is bad, isn’t it? Al, you may wanna get in and rescue your brother sooner rather than later. Jeez, hope Soul-Bound Armors don’t feel pain. Or at least it was quick for Pompous, getting split in two like that. WELL OK THEN. Guess that answers the question “Do Soul Armors feel pain?”. Envy’s taken up the sword and is repeatedly stabbing the Armor-Slicer’s seal, ranting about how their attacking the important sacrifice could have messed up the entire plan. Finally, the armor stops moving. Ed slowly slides up the wall to get to his feet, facing down Lust and Envy and demanding to know who they are. Uh, Ed? I know that you don’t know these people, that you aren’t aware that they seem to have hurt Scar enough - you know, that guy who utterly wrecked you and Al? - to send him into hiding. And that you’re pissed off enough to ignore your own physical state. But maybe you think you could tone it down a notch? Not try to kick Envy and prepare to fight? Whelp. Ed’s arm just went kaput. Winry, as much as I respect you as a mechanic, gonna have to question the choice to go so heavy with chrome. Rust isn’t as bad as these “technical difficutlies.” And yup Envy-knee to the stomach, Ed’s down for the count. [Lust]: “Listen to me well, boy. Don’t ever forget this. Always remember that we allowed you to live.” And of course, since Ed was poking around the place, it’ll have to go. Lust orders Envy to blow it up. Hey, uh, Al? How you holding up? Aw, no. Al, please. Please don’t let Pudgy’s mindgames get to you. Don’t start thinking that what Ed was going to tell you last episode was that... Hooray, Ross and Brosh are here! Woefully ignorant of how useless bullets are against Pudgy, but still. Uh oh, building’s cracking. And Pudgy recognizes what that means, makes a speedy exit. Al cries out that Ed’s still inside. Well, it’s not like the Goths are going to let their “important sacrifice” die as they dispose of the evidence, right? Called it! Envy walks out of the dust with Ed slung over his shoulder, drops him off with Al and Ross while cheerfully saying they should take him to a hospital and keep a better eye on him. “He’s a precious resource.” And like that, he’s gone. As the lab crumbles, the prison next door is home to a bunch of yelling prisoners. And further inside, someone named Kimblee remarks that it’s lovely to hear a building exploding. Hey, it’s Smiley, from the flashback to the Ishvalan War. You know, the guy who was grinning during the genocide? Seems he’s in prison now. This is the guy that Mr. Freeze was trying to recruit in the first episode too, wasn’t it? And even as the lab crumbles, even as our characters rush to get Ed to a hospital… Al thinks about what Pudgy said. ...wait, that’s it? That’s the episode? Come on! How rude is it to leave poor Al doubting his own personhood?! Post-credits: Hughes is talking on a phone, remarking that things at Central are pretty hectic. All the senior Alchemists killed by Scar? Rumor is a certain Roy Mustang may get promoted to fill in the spaces. But getting advanced so young Roy’s bound to make enemies. He needs as many people on his side as possible. Like a wife! ...yeah, I’m with you, [Receptionist]. Hughes, please stop with the personal phone calls. [Narrator]: “Edward Elric cannot find the right words to say what he must. Meanwhile, young Alphonse is frightened by his brother’s continued silence. Where does the truth lie? This truth is waiting, hidden in the memories of a young girl. Next time, on Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood-” Episode 09 - “Created Feelings” “The heart begins to waver because if fears what the truth may bring.” Hey, looks like we get to see Winry again! Almost makes up for Alphonse having to doubt his very existence! Man, I can’t wait to see Pudgy bite it!

[truthbeetoldmedia]

The 100 6x10 “Matryoshka” Review 

You know, when I was assigned this episode to review, I wasn’t expecting to be discussing a moment like THAT (you all know what I’m referring to), so please, be kind while I process by obsessively refreshing Twitter and try to put my thoughts together. 

There’s definitely a lot going on in this episode, some of which I LOVED (take a wild guess on what part that is folks), and some of which I was less than fond of. It’s all high tension and high stakes, even more than the last. I’m a big fan of the moves they made to set everything into place; this is probably one of my favorite episodes of the season. 

Action and Reaction 

Here’s the thing. Putting almost all of your characters in one place forces conversation and development, which can turn out fascinating, or it can illuminate the truly unnecessary plot points and characters that have been hanging on all season. 

Raven and Abby are back from space and being taken prisoner like the rest of the Arkadians when Simone, angry about the loss of both the synthetic nightblood and the mind drive they used for Kane, tells Abby that Clarke is dead. As the audience we know that this isn’t exactly true, but Abby has no reason to think she’s alive, since every other host body is completely taken over by whoever’s mind drive is put in that body. 

I was pretty peeved with both Raven and Abby’s reactions to Clarke’s “death,” even though it’s been an ongoing joke online that Josie!Clarke could basically say and do anything and Abby still wouldn’t notice that something was up with her daughter. Raven’s been mad at Clarke for the entire season, so I guess I understand a lack of reaction on her part — but Abby? Her lack of reaction is only so off-putting because just last episode we saw an absolute outpouring of grief over Kane. It makes no sense that the news of her only child’s death wouldn't even garner 10% of that. 

The thing is, that’s poor characterization either way. Failing to show an emotional response that makes sense is a failure of the writing, and making her grief over Kane much more significant than over Clarke on purpose only highlights how far gone she is. That’s not a character worth keeping around, especially if this difference in emotion and priority is never addressed (and I don’t think it’s going to be). If the writers room is so keen on keeping her around they need to put some effort into showing the audience why that’s worthwhile. I know there are people who like Abby, but when it comes down to plot, what purpose does she serve? In a cast so large they need to trim loose ends or suffer for it, and I think hanging onto Abby for so long is an example of that. What has she done all season besides hole up in the library looking for a way to heal Kane, who’s been technically dead since the Season 5 finale? You could argue that they need her for the synthetic nightblood, but giving Becca’s notebook to Raven and having her do it also makes sense, especially since Abby doesn’t even leverage that ability when she should. Case in point: when Russell decides to burn them all at the stake after Simone’s murder, Murphy is the one who brings up being able to make nightblood from bone marrow, thereby saving everyone from a super vintage execution (for now). 

While we’re at it — I can’t believe Abby is actually mad at Murphy for helping the Primes, even though he and Emori explain that they both thought Clarke was actually dead and nothing could be done about it. Sure, what Murphy did was a little cold and sketchy at best, but it’s right on brand. Clarke’s dead? Nothing can be done about it? Better leverage this to my advantage. Self preservation, baby. That’s much less than Abby did literally ONE episode ago, being fully complicit in Gavin’s murder and actually recruiting him to host Kane’s mind drive even though she knew exactly what would happen. 

That’s exactly why these scenes with everyone felt stale: not every character is pulling their weight, and when that happens the scene gets bogged down with unnecessary interactions. There’s too many characters that really only take up space. Characters like Jackson, Miller, Niylah, and even Echo are dead weight at this point. Again, I know that these characters have their fans. That doesn’t change the fact that as far as the narrative is concerned, they're all relatively useless. Just being a named character doesn’t automatically give them significance, that significance has to be shown. What exactly does Miller bring to the show? Or Niylah? Even if they were once important that importance is dwindling if not non-existent. Miller could have been a compelling character: he was Bellamy’s right hand man in Season 1. He’s one of the original hundred. They could have done more with him, but in reality he’s replaceable. If you took Miller, Jackson, and Niylah out of the show, nothing would change. You could even say the same for Abby and Echo; they have more screen time than the rest, but Abby’s continued presence on the show feels forced and Echo is far from a developed character. Their “skills” can easily be transferable to other characters. Characters like Jordan and Emori are MUCH more compelling. 

Another thing that drags the episode down (and the season, if I’m being honest)? The whole “Sheidheda” making Madi a murder princess. I absolutely cannot fathom WHY grounder culture is still a thing on this show. They are on another planet, over a century later, with a thousand better things to focus on. I understand that Madi’s nightblood is significant, and the flame might be as well (from a technology standpoint). But why introduce this “dark commander”? if they wanted Madi to go full assassin, the pain of losing Clarke would have been enough to justify it. Also, what point does Madi/Sheidheda being so threatening towards Gaia serve? Having to listen to anything about the commanders is honestly exhausting, and it’s holding the show back. They’ve moved on (literally) in almost every capacity, and the show’s tendency to beat a dead horse only ever backfires. 

Not to sound too harsh, but that feeling I get whenever someone calls Madi “heda” is the same feeling I get if I’m at a party and this one person can only talk about how great high school was. This again? We’re in our late twenties. High school wasn’t great. Please, let it go. 

With that being said, they are setting up the next episode in a way that makes me think they might take the flame out of Madi for good, so we’ll see how that goes. 

Now, there are some compelling pieces here: it was nice to see Raven go back to being sciencey and a little bit philosophical after almost a full season of nothing but self-righteousness. Her conversation with Murphy about morality, not immortality, as a way to avoid hell was well done. The 100 loves a good morality conversation, and with things getting more dire in Sanctum and the growing comparisons between the Primes and Arkadians I’m sure that’s not the last we’ll hear of it. 

Getting almost everyone in one place, setting the stage for getting the dark commander out of Madi’s head, and setting up one last ditch effort to appease the Primes was great. The pacing in this case was well done and well executed, despite the issues that I did have, and I know that the final showdown will be epic. 

The hold that the Primes have over Sanctum is disintegrating, to put it mildly, and my guess is that a mass witch trial-esque execution isn’t exactly the way to put the populace at ease. 

There’s even an internal rebellion being incited by Ryker, who tells Delilah’s parents and another man that their loved ones aren’t “one with the Primes,” that nothing is left of the original host when the Prime’s mind drive takes over, and they’ve been lied to for decades. I’m curious to see the reaction when everyone in Sanctum learns the truth. 

The Primes are Dead. Long Live the Primes.

Here’s the thing about the Primes and the Arkadians — they’re so concerned with not being like each other that they conveniently ignore or justify what they’re doing. Russell is hellbent on not ending up like the Arkadians, but how, in any way, are the Primes better than the Arkadians? At their current positions, I’d say that the Primes are decidedly worse. Here’s the thing, though — they’ve had time. Josie said it herself — she wasn’t always like this. Give the Arkadians a few centuries, and who's to say they wouldn’t devolve into something similar? 

The driving force for both groups has always been taking care of “their people.” What’s not usually discussed is that in order to put your people first you need to put other people last. Someone almost always suffers, it's just about prioritizing that suffering. 

It circles back around to that question of trying to save humanity but never bothering to question if it even should be saved. Sure, the Primes can live forever. Should they?

Clarke even gets a glimpse of Josie’s morality, or the morality she used to have, as their minds start to disintegrate and Josie’s memories bleed into Clarke’s mind space. We see Josie in love with Gabriel, watching that memory fondly until she absolutely has to let it go. In another episode, Clarke already discovered that memory of Josie’s from that diner on Earth. 

Finally, when Gabriel and Octavia find Bellamy and Clarke/Josie and Gabriel is about to take out her mind drive, almost all of her memories are gone. Eliza Taylor absolutely kills this whole scene, and I actually could have shed a tear for Josie when she speaks through Clarke, saying she can’t remember, but she’s sure she did terrible things.  

Josie had morality. Josie lost it. 

The entire run of the show has been exploring morality and what it means — no simple task, I know. I think, however, that Gabriel really embodied that when he let Josie die. He said it himself, he’s been in love with her for centuries. But he needs, everyone needs, the cycle to stop. Putting an end to using hosts is the only way to do it. 

That’s Love, Bitches 

I mean… come on. Come ON. 

This scene was everything. Well acted, well written, well directed. I cried, you cried, everyone cried. Twitter imploded. I’ll go to my grave being adamant that Bellamy and Clarke’s relationship is THE best and most well done thing about the show. The entirety of the sixth season is built on Clarke being gone and Bellamy fighting for her to come back. Love, sacrifice, forgiveness — all are main tenets of The 100, and all are wrapped up in Bellamy and Clarke. 

It’s crystal clear that they’re paralleling Gabriel and Josie with Bellamy and Clarke. Josie dies, Gabriel letting her go while saying that their time is over, only for Bellamy to immediately bring Clarke back? Josie and Gabriel’s time is over, and Bellamy and Clarke’s is starting. A literal new life.

They really threw every romantic trope at them this episode. Clarke’s heart stopping in front of Bellamy and him pleading for her to come back? Bellamy saying he needs her? The CPR? The remnants of Josie try to kill Clarke, and she only comes back when she hears Bellamy’s voice? The first thing she sees when she comes back is Bellamy’s face? Octavia’s smirk in the back? The audacity. 

This scene was lead up to with a full six seasons of development — from the beginning they were the head and the heart. Gabriel said it, the heart needs the head to tell it to beat. Clarke, clinging to her mind space, only came back because Bellamy restarted her heart. He’s her literal heart, guys. 

Bellamy has thought Clarke was dead three times now — the first was during Praimfaya, the second when he discovered Josie was inhabiting Clarke’s body. Both of those times he could only witness and not do anything, so you better believe he wasn’t going to let Clarke die if he had anything to say about it. 

There is a clear stage for romantic Bellarke being set here, and anyone who says otherwise is not watching the same show. You don’t have to like it, but it’s happening.

Honestly, anything I could say about this has already been said. Just know that this episode killed me, and I’ll be watching the next one from the afterlife. 

Alyssa’s episode rating: 🐝🐝🐝🐝

The 100 airs Tuesdays at 9/8c on the CW.

[abundantchewtoys]

HS Epi: Meat p7 reaction

Well, seeing as to what movie I just watched on Sunday. "We're in the Endgame now." :O I wonder if it'll switch back to Earth C before showing us (the tail end of) the Masterpiece scene.

I'm curious to know how truthful Caliborn was about the scene, what he may have omitted from his retelling (the presence of the leprechauns, maybe?), and also how it concluded. I wonder if it'll be told from Dirk's perspective, after the B1 kids have been stolen. He's got the closest connection to Cal and Arquiusprite, after all. I wonder how his perception of his puppet might have changed, too. For all we know, LOTAK might have been ripe with allusions and phropecies regarding the thing, thanks to his denizen. That's another thing connecting him to LE, after all: Yaldabaoth. Just cause he never went into the Lion's Mouth doesn't mean he didn't harvest every bit of intel and backstory. This is Dirk 'Batman Gambit' Strider we're talking about.

---

"The boxing bell is going off like it's having a fit." Well, I did ask for Dirk's perspective. :P Wrong Dirk! Okay, so it seems like the POV will be changing hands like a baton pass on Earth C. That would mean we're in for Rose's POV next, and I wouldn't mind that. Tight-lipped as she would still be even in her own mind's narration about her plans, it'd be nice to see things from her end!

"Dirk has to stick a finger in one ear to hear what Rose is saying over the cacophony of boos and buckets being lobbed toward center stage." Not sure if it would be worse or not for trolls to have thrown that bucket.

"He considers it all pretty fucking annoying, so he flips off the crowd and jumps the ropes. Always a good idea to abscond from the stadium before the customary show-end riot hits full swing." ... So his whole upset-the-audience-into-rioting is par for the course? Dear god, are all his fans hooligans? ... That actually runs pretty close to what happened in AIDS, come to think of it.

"ROSE: It’s not so much “what is up” as “what is down,” the answer to which is, proverbially: Me." Down for the count, not down in the brooding caverns, naturally. You know, since she's ascended to the highest top of the surface.

"ROSE: I mean that both physically and philosophically by the way.

DIRK: You’re down philosophically?

ROSE: Yes.

DIRK: I’m not sure what that actually means.

ROSE: What doesn’t it mean, Dirk." Oh my freaking god, these guys might even be more amazing together than Dave and Rose, it's a sight to behold.

"DIRK: Glad to see that my genetic predisposition for melodrama is still alive and well in my slime-progeny even after all these years.

ROSE: Please don’t interrupt. This is important, and I’ll need all the energy I can spare to sustain even a heavily monologic transmission of the relevant facts." Yes, Dirk, please cut Rose some slack, she only has so few monologues left in her. :P

"ROSE: Anyway, the matter at hand is my “condition,” with which you’re already familiar.

ROSE: I’ve struggled to devise the right way of telling you without causing undue alarm, which would unquestionably trigger the overbearing tendency of yours to “solve the problem” for me, which is not the kind of circumstance my constitution can withstand these days.

ROSE: I can barely lift a wrist to my forehead to telegraph my infirmity, of late. Your bullshit is precisely the thousand-pound feather that could knock me clean through my apartment’s plate glass window." While I don't disagree Rose's condition might be severe, I see she's still well enough to heat a scalding plate of sarcasm. Also, wouldn't Jasprosesprite^2 be better than Dirk at handling her situation? Her feelings for interacting with a clownesk version of herself not withstanding, it's a Rose that already went through the ultimate self thing. Granted, she had fake magic Sprite powers to help her cope, as well as bullshit feline asshole personality issues.

"I’m taking solace in the fact that your infirmity doesn’t seem to have spread to your vocal cords yet." Right, got to remind myself that actual voices are being used to talk with one another. Still not used to it for Homestuck characters doing this when phones are involved. :P The only time it happened in-story was when a "shellphone" was involved, after all.

"ROSE: The bottom line is this.

ROSE: I am ascending, and it is terrible." ... Hmm, could that imply that the Ultimate Self is the last of the god tiers, or pretty high up there, at least? It would take a ridiculous amount of XP, seven years may or may not be enough, but if it's about the accumulation of self-reflection & general knowledge, a Seer of Light would be pretty quick to collect that kind of required boons.

"Rose adjusts her position on the couch with the body language of one about to dive into the latest gossip about a mutual friend. The mutual in this case: her tortured psyche." So the therapist is seeking counsil, in a way, is she? :P

"ROSE: Years of refining my Seer of Light powers have cursed me with what is approaching near infinite prescience. Dwelling in this idyllic post-canon realm has worn down the barriers separating my primary consciousness from the memories and experiences of all my doomed alternate selves, which were forgotten and discarded over the due course of our journey." So that implies they were many, more than we'd assume immediately. There's Dream Rose, Alternate Future Rose, pre-retcon Rose (now Jasprose) & B2 Rose, but it appears there are more still. Well, okay, there's also Reload Rose now, I guess.

"ROSE: As I approach the realization of my Ultimate Self, I cannot stop the extant knowledge from seeping in. I am plagued by near constant visions from the less fortunate versions of myself, as well as a broadening view of the metatextual nature of our existence." She's starting to become self-aware, before you know it she'll be addressing us directly through the Fourth Wall! Well, it's not like we didn't have a smug monologic narrator before. (Did I mean Doc Scratch, Andrew Hussie or Lord English? Yes.)

"ROSE: It drains all of my energy to keep my consciousness focused on relevant events, but even then I am losing my ability to discern what is and is not canonically relevant, let alone what is also true or essential." Well, okay, if she can't even discern between her own life, fanon and fan fiction, she might really have a problem.

"ROSE: And all of this is making me incredibly fucking sick." Rose is getting Homestucksick, is it? :P

"DIRK: Oh. Is that all?" My first thought was: blatant sarcasm. But then... We don't know how far Dirk's powers extend, do we? What shards of his has he had access to all this time, if Brain Ghost Dirk is any indication?

"DIRK: Well, in the spirit of full disclosure,

DIRK: Same." Ooooooh, wow. So it's the same for him? If he was nurturing the mother grub of all splitting headaches all this time, no wonder he pisses on the whole audience experience every time. While he would have more experience juggling disparate experiences, it was already a strain on him back when it was just him and Dream Dirk. Can you imagine him having to jostle Arquiusprite's thoughts & desires, or god forbid, some part of Lord English' experiences too? ... Okay now I'm curious as to what it's like for Dirk.

... Dirk's Ultimate Self experience would have been one of those things I would have liked to see speculation of, back on the old forums. But alas, we're archival readers now, not serial readers. It was not meant to be.

Got to say though. If it's this hard on the god tiers, how must it be for Terezi? Because I'm pretty sure post-retcon Terezi forced an ultimate self revelation on herself through her mindy thing.

It might be that Mind is the aspect best suited at handling all these inflows from doomed timelines and conditional experiences. Or it might be that Heart is, they're related aspects, and Heart is supposed to stand for Soul. It just might depend on where you think the self is defined: in actual experiences, or in the potential for them, realized or not.

"DIRK: We are suffering from the same condition, Rose." So... Does this lend more stake to Dirk's idea for backing Jane, or is it just one of those situations where he can't discern the right course of action any more, that Rose was referring to?

"She allows several rare conversational beats to pass in silence between them, to process the admission." That's how you know things are grave, when Dirk and Rose stop talking.

"DIRK: I guess I used the wrong phrase. You are suffering from it. I am adapting to it.

DIRK: I already have, really." No, wait, THIS is how you know things are grave: when Dirk insists he's got a handle on things. "Adapting", like he's the AI version of himself, not the human version.

"ROSE: When were you going to tell me this?

DIRK: When you were ready.

ROSE: So you have determined that I’m ready to receive this rather critical piece of information now, of all times?

ROSE: What distinguishes the present from the other moments you could have mentioned it?" Well, isn't today the day that things become relevant again, Rose? April 13th? :P

"DIRK: Wow. Well, when you put it that way, it makes me sound like kind of a dick.

DIRK: But I guess it isn’t far from the truth, either." Well, you already sound like kind of a Dirk, most of the time, so

"

ROSE: Unbelievable.

DIRK: Look, it’s not something you just spring on people that frivolously.

DIRK: “Hey folks, just so you know, the boundaries of my awareness are coming apart, and now I know almost everything, about everyone, everywhere.”" "I can see into forever!" Okay, so it was more Dirk's low self-esteem springing up again. He was waiting for someone to "get it" and make the first move. So, is the omniscience thing coming from Arquius' unfathomable depths of AI? Or its connection to Doc Scatch???

"

DIRK: “Also, the process should be tearing my body apart, but actually I’m handling it quite well. Thanks for the concern though.”" Imagine Dirk as the dog in the "This is fine" image.

"DIRK: There will be time to explain all this.

DIRK: Despite whatever appearance of callousness I’ve maintained in withholding this information from you, I actually do have your best interests in mind. I don’t want to wear you out on this call." Gotta say, omniscient Dirk working behind the scenes with whatever boatload of narrative information he has on hand is both assuring and worrying.

"DIRK: For now, I’ll just mention that I’ve been alert to your problem for some time, and I’ve been devising a solution which should permanently remedy it without compromising the boon of your expanding consciousness." ... Definitely tipping back into worrying. It's for the lack of kernelsprites on Earth C that I'll give Dirk the benefit of the doubt, for now.

"DIRK: Would love to tell you, but I’ve got some work to do. Why don’t you stop by my studio later so we can hash this shit out in person." ... I dearly hope his solution isn't: "Here, upload your consciousness into this Rosebot. There! All the limits of your feeble immortal biological coil, removed."

So, Dirk (and Jake) have a studio, Rose has an apartment, Dave 'n Karkat 'n Jade a hive, John a house. I wonder if Jane has ended up owning a mansion of sorts (the White House doesn't count... yet).

Also, Dirk hashing things out is funny, because of Dave's former sylladex mode: hashmap.

"

DIRK: Right now, you should get some rest." Hmm, Blaperile has some theories rest might help her condition. I wonder if, through sleeping or some other process, Rose might be able to actually 'act' through her alternate selves. What if she could make contact with Reload Rose, send her some bits of the bigger picture without overloading her with information?

"ROSE: Actually, I’m feeling oddly invigorated suddenly. I think I’m good for more exposition, if you are." ... Okay didn't see that coming. Either she's scathingly sarcastic right now, or we're in for a treat.

"DIRK: Can’t say I’m surprised. But no." Nothing to perk up Rose better than the promise of secrets not yet revealed, I guess!

"ROSE: Have I caught you at a bad time?

DIRK: Nah, but there is an election coming up, and my work as a political operative is going to be absolutely essential for the fate of humanity." See, Rose could think Dirk is being falseful, but she's nearing omniscience so probably not. Still, Dirk is forgetting to include other species' fate in his calculations, not just humanity's.

"ROSE: I see. Wheels within wheels, I assume?

DIRK: There are always wheels. Wheels are everywhere.

DIRK: They aren’t my wheels or yours. The wheels don’t have owners or designers, but they do have caretakers.

DIRK: They won’t keep turning on their own without someone to grease the mechanism." This is turning into a Dave metaphor again. ... But hmm, that's a mechanics metaphor he's using. Is that a reference to that Rosebot I theorized about... or Arquiusprite? Cause if Rose could act through Reload Rose, Dirk could act through either his Reload self or Arquiusprite! Here's to hoping there isn't a shard in Lord English influencing his behaviour, or reading his every thought and intent.

"the full brunt of the sunset: purple and orange, blending brilliantly on the horizon." I see what you did there. Yes, Dirk and Rose's first actual conversation was brilliant.

"She’s right about him, he thinks. While his ecto-daughter views herself as having a somewhat deft artistic hand that lends itself naturally to a gentle push-and-pull style of influence, Dirk knows his methods are mechanical, like those of an engineer. There is nothing adaptive or interpretive about his method. Every piece has a purpose, a slot, an interlocking mechanism that is functionally pointless without the whole." Yes, it's been pointed out on occasion Rose is quite elegant in her ways. Those ways don't include tidying her room, but still. With the visuals being used to describe both of Rose 'n Dirk's different takes on influencing people, I am reminded of how Names in the "Practical Guide to Evil" story feel different for each person. For one, like putting on a tailormade pair of gloves, for another, like observing the methodical churning of a machine. I already felt quite a few times reminded of Homestuck while archive-reading PGtE (not done yet!), it's only fitting it now goes the other way around again.

Also, thinking about the wheels metaphor has gotten me thinking about LOHAC, and now I have the Clockwork theme from the Medium album stuck in my head.

[yoolee]

If lee wrote otome | #2 - Boss

The Heroine (MC)

CEO MC: Never gets enough sleep, which makes her sarcastic but is also semi her own fault given the amount of caffeine she consumes. Sort of obsessive about long-term planning, unwaveringly believes that a company’s value comes from its employees and will choose them over shareholder dividends every time. Determined to run an ethical company even if it means it’s not the most profitable company. Super duper Type A – aggressive and fearless because she has to be. Sometimes really just wants a cupcake in her hand and a cat in her lap, but then she’s bored and goes back to business planning. Creative risk-taker, decent negotiator. Smart enough to know where she needs help and hire people who can do the things she can’t (or, more to the point, doesn’t want to do). Gets back up every time. Will definitely fight you. Might feel bad about it later but only if someone reminds her it happened.

Love Interests

The BARISTA: Peppy, optimist (or so MC thinks) but it turns out they actually switch up their personality depending on who they’re serving (sometimes they are the chill, hipster philosopher, sometimes they are the rude New York get-it-done eye roller, etc.) actually somewhere in the middle of it all – but really IS an optimist despite themselves. Kind of slippery and hard to pin down. Big family, used to being what their other siblings/parents need from them. Fairly certain CEO MC is headed for an early heart attack with the amount of espresso she imbibes. Probably an author. Maybe an ex-broadway personjust because. IDK.

The PR LAWYER: Worked-three-jobs-put-self-through-college story. Patience, tact, good at calming people down. Detail oriented, a little fussy about appearances. Perennially exasperated by CEO (Please don’t promise to have a cure for cancer In the next three years with no data to back it up. No, you can’t punch the reporter for being a dick. Look, I know you WANT to donate 100% of proceeds to charity but please pick a friendlier one than ‘punch reporters in the face foundation’ that’s not gonna fly) never gets enough sleep. Has a key to MC’s house so they can come yell at her for making their life difficult at whatever hour of the night she insists on doing so. Is on MC’s speed-dial, which means they also get called to DD, though they’d rather not.

FLAKY MODEL(s?): Trust fund kid? Pretty face? Floats through life? The sort of person who will get on the wrong subway train and then just ride it all day people-watching never mind that they had an appointment six hours ago. Pose with a boa constrictor? Sure, as long as it’s being treated humanely. Tarantula on the face? Awwww, it’s fuzzyyyyy. No filter, no worries. Probably drags CEO MC along on a Caribbean shoot and PR Lawyer has to call and yell because that does not look good, okay? And poor MC is like, I thought we were getting a drink and model is like WE ARE we are getting tropical coconut water from the SOURCE here oh wait I don’t know how to drink out of a coconut…who knows why they are attracted to CEO MC, probably because she’s there and sticks around and no one else does. Human puppy dog.

CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD: young hotshot venture capitalist, thinks CEO MC is a bleeding heart (your employees do not need that many sick days, lost productivity blah blah blah why do we need a daycare onsite that’s a waste of shareholder money), kind of a math whiz, naturally lucky, doesn’t get along with family (gambling problem in the fam – which manifests in him in investment risks and unresolved issues) butts heads constantly with MC, frequently tries to get her fired – in part because his attempts to do so get her fired up and she does great things, which ultimately is better for the company than when she’s just doing her normal ‘good’ job. She is going to be royally ticked when she figures that out. Manipulative, but relatively benign under it all. The sort of person who smirks instead of smiles. All the time.

CHEF FROM HER FAVORITE RESTAURANT: Also a CEO though on smaller scale, because, running a restaurant IS running a business. Probably under the impression CEO MC is actually like, a graduate student with no money because she tends to get takeout at weird hours. Gruff, grumpy, abrupt, but heart of gold. Basically—will grumble about you coming in late but will add extra veggies to your pasta because you’re looking a little pale and need the nutrients and if you call them on it will snarl that they had to be used up they were going bad and he wasn’t going to waste extra, expensive, PROTEIN on you. (MC asks them out and then realizes the only nice restaurant she knows is the one the chef owns)

PRESCHOOL TEACHER: JUST A DECENTLY NICE PERSON. Checks in to make sure MC has eaten regularly, staying hydrated, needs anything fixed around the house (she can do her own plumbing but doesn’t like the electrical and hey it’s nice to have company). Good with kids. Maybe divorced and wanted them but ex-spouse didn’t? idk. Calm, not easily ruffled, sweet as pie, except when he’s playing video games and suddenly MC understands how he can get through the day without any aggression – he unleashes it on fictional zombies. Blissfully normal, all things considered.

PERSONAL TRAINER: “fine, whatever, EAT THE DANG CHEESE if you’re just going to ignore my nutritional advice we’re doing ten more reps” athletic, happiest when DOING versus saying or reading or sitting. Not as impulsive as you’d guess at first glance, because they tend to use working out as a meditative time to make decisions. Didn’t finish college because they realized they just didn’t enjoy it, but they did enjoy working with student athletes, which is how they got into training. Enviably fit. Wants to expand the gym so wheedles business advice out of MC in exchange for not harassing her about her tendency to drink coffee instead of water (she insists it has water IN it, it should count) not particularly intimidated by her, which is a pleasant change of pace.

Supporting Cast (non LIs)

ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT: Keeps MC sane, has her back, schedules everything. Good at details, even better at smiling at angry people and making them not-angry through sheer force of sunny personality (actually a ruse, MC is convinced she’s actually the most delightfully evil person ever, but like some kind of fairy tale where when you acknowledge the thing it goes away, refuses to ever dive into figuring out). Older than the MC because we need to stop making middle aged women invisible in stories?? Sometimes has to remind MC of how much she does by holding silent protests (in part why MC thinks she is secretly a supervillain in the making) which are always, always successful.

PARENT COMPANY ADMIN ASSISTANT: Bane of MC’s existence. Smarmy, smily pain in the tush.

CFO: We have put in an official request with the company credit card management to start declining purchases at that coffee shop you go to, no this is not negotiable, it’s not in the budget anymore drink so darn water woman. Completely willing to go toe-to-toe with MC, meetings often involve a lot of yelling, but they’re always productive and no hard feelings.

CIO: Serpent-y, but not in a bad way. Just a very cool-tempered person, very contained, very guarded, very introverted. Never happy when she has to do presentations, so super willing to share knowledge with MC so she does it instead (she is not a great teacher, kind of judgey and shows her frustration when MC doesn’t ‘get’ it right away, but very brilliant, and there’s no malice in the judgement, just no filter). Extremely logic-oriented and process-oriented over people-oriented. Picks up and assess tech very quickly, and good at finding affordable, fast solutions.

RANDOM MARKETING EMPLOYEE:  Set up to be a villain but is actually like gung-ho on MC’s side. Literally an ex pageant queen, went to college on scholarship from it. Out of the workforce for awhile as a stay at home mom when her kids were young, but picks up the new trends fast. Now a single mother, so will literally fight the chairman if he tries to take away the company daycare. Some days uses the ‘people see a pretty face and assume no brain’ to her advantage, some days it wears her out. Unofficially drinking buddy with MC, even though they both feel weird about it given the fact MC is technically boss’s boss’s boss.

BARTENDER: also an ex-girlfriend maybe? Current best friend? Who she turns to when the barista cuts her off from coffee and the chef’s restaurant is already closed. Sharp-tongued, bristly, generally disgusted with MC’s six inch heels and slacks in her leather-jacket, cigar smoke bar. Like lady, you’re lost. Probably on the mob payroll at some point in her life.

ROUTE PLOTS:

(Chairman route?) MERGER – company has just bought another company, which is a major risk move for CEO (can only be one, so do you keep the old one on as a VP? Do you let them go? Will they be bitter/try to sabotage you?) you have to fend off internal sabotage, get everything running smoothly without either company falling apart in the process.  

(PR Lawyer route?) Parent company did something massively shady and it’s tainting your company’s name too, so you have to scrounge to avoid having to fire half your employees and keep the company alive.

(Model route?) New product launch – hence why models are entering the picture. It’s a new business venture in the sense it’s targeted at a completely new audience your company hasn’t catered to before.

(Personal Trainer route?) Company is in its infancy, hugely risky time, and you’re doing everything you can to ensure it’s a success  (maybe including putting your own salary back into it, which means you can’t afford PT so they agree to work with you as long as you give them business advice)

FROM @han-pan- they keep trying to buy new retail space for the gym and MC keeps buying it instead because it’s SUCH GOOD PROPERTY and they sort of exasperatedly are like ugh fine whatever you owe me since you keep swiping prime spots out from under my nose

See the rest here

[savedfromsalvation]

The Jesus Forgery: Josephus Untangled

 by Acharya S/D.M. Murdock

The following article is excerpted from:

Suns of God: Krishna, Buddha and Christ Unveiled

When addressing the mythical nature of Jesus Christ, one issue repeatedly raised is the purported "evidence" of his existence to be found in the writings of Flavius Josephus, the famed Jewish general and historian who lived from about 37 to 100 CE. In Josephus's Antiquities of the Jews appears the notorious passage regarding Christ called the "Testimonium Flavianum" ("TF"):

"Now, there was about this time, Jesus, a wise man, if it be lawful to call him a man, for he was a doer of wonderful works,--a teacher of such men as receive the truth with pleasure. He drew over to him both many of the Jews, and many of the Gentiles. He was [the] Christ; and when Pilate, at the suggestion of the principal men amongst us, had condemned him to the cross, those that loved him at the first did not forsake him, for he appeared to them alive again the third day, as the divine prophets had foretold these and ten thousand other wonderful things concerning him; and the tribe of Christians, so named from him, are not extinct at this day." (Whitson, 379)

This surprisingly brief and simplistic passage constitutes the "best proof" of Jesus's existence in the entire ancient non-Christian library comprising the works of dozens of historians, writers, philosophers, politicians and others who never mentioned the great sage and wonderworker Jesus Christ, even though they lived contemporaneously with or shortly after the Christian savior's purported advent.

A False Witness

Despite the best wishes of sincere believers and the erroneous claims of truculent apologists, the Testimonium Flavianum has been demonstrated continually over the centuries to be a forgery, likely interpolated by Catholic Church historian Eusebius in the fourth century. So thorough and universal has been this debunking that very few scholars of repute continued to cite the passage after the turn of the 19th century. Indeed, the TF was rarely mentioned, except to note that it was a forgery, and numerous books by a variety of authorities over a period of 200 or so years basically took it for granted that the Testimonium Flavianum in its entirety was spurious, an interpolation and a forgery. As Dr. Gordon Stein relates:

"...the vast majority of scholars since the early 1800s have said that this quotation is not by Josephus, but rather is a later Christian insertion in his works. In other words, it is a forgery, rejected by scholars."

So well understood was this fact of forgery that these numerous authorities did not spend their precious time and space rehashing the arguments against the TF's authenticity. Nevertheless, in the past few decades apologists of questionable integrity and credibility have glommed onto the TF, because this short and dubious passage represents the most "concrete" secular, non-biblical reference to a man who purportedly shook up the world. In spite of the past debunking, the debate is currently confined to those who think the TF was original to Josephus but was Christianized, and those who credulously and self-servingly accept it as "genuine" in its entirety.

To repeat, this passage was so completely dissected by scholars of high repute and standing--the majority of them pious Christians--that it was for decades understood by subsequent scholars as having been proved in toto a forgery, such that these succeeding scholars did not even mention it, unless to acknowledge it as false. (In addition to being repetitious, numerous quotes will be presented here, because a strong show of rational consensus is desperately needed when it comes to matters of blind, unscientific and irrational faith.) The scholars who so conclusively proved the TF a forgery made their mark at the end of the 18th century and into the 20th, when a sudden reversal was implemented, with popular opinion hemming and hawing its way back first to the "partial interpolation theory" and in recent times, among the third-rate apologists, to the notion that the whole TF is "genuine." As Earl Doherty says, in "Josephus Unbound":

"Now, it is a curious fact that older generations of scholars had no trouble dismissing this entire passage as a Christian construction. Charles Guignebert, for example, in his Jesus (1956, p.17), calls it 'a pure Christian forgery.' Before him, Lardner, Harnack and Schurer, along with others, declared it entirely spurious. Today, most serious scholars have decided the passage is a mix: original parts rubbing shoulders with later Christian additions."

The earlier scholarship that proved the entire TF to be fraudulent was determined by intense scrutiny by some of the most erudite, and mainly Christian, writers of the time, in a number of countries, their works written in a variety of languages, but particularly German, French and English. Their general conclusions, as elucidated by Christian authority Dr. Lardner, and related here by the author of Christian Mythology Unveiled (c. 1842), include the following reasons for doubting the authenticity of the TF as a whole:

"Mattathias, the father of Josephus, must have been a witness to the miracles which are said to have been performed by Jesus, and Josephus was born within two years after the crucifixion, yet in all the works he says nothing whatever about the life or death of Jesus Christ; as for the interpolated passage it is now universally acknowledged to be a forgery. The arguments of the 'Christian Ajax,' even Lardner himself, against it are these: 'It was never quoted by any of our Christian ancestors before Eusebius. It disturbs the narrative. The language is quite Christian. It is not quoted by Chrysostom, though he often refers to Josephus, and could not have omitted quoting it had it been then in the text. It is not quoted by Photius [9th century], though he has three articles concerning Josephus; and this author expressly states that this historian has not taken the least notice of Christ. Neither Justin Martyr, in his dialogue with Trypho the Jew; nor Clemens Alexandrinus, who made so many extracts from ancient authors; nor Origen against Celsus, have ever mentioned this testimony. But, on the contrary, in chap. 25th of the first book of that work, Origen openly affirms that Josephus, who had mentioned John the Baptist, did not acknowledge Christ. That this passage is a false fabrication is admitted by Ittigius, Blondel, Le Clerc, Vandale, Bishop Warburton, and Tanaquil Faber.'" (CMU, 47)

Hence, by the 1840's, when the anonymous author of Christian Mythology Unveiled wrote, the Testimonium Flavanium was already "universally acknowledged to be a forgery."

The pertinent remarks by the highly significant Church father Origen (c. 185-c.254) appear in his Contra Celsus, Book I, Chapter XLVII:

"For in the 18th book of his Antiquities of the Jews, Josephus bears witness to John as having been a Baptist, and as promising purification to those who underwent the rite. Now this writer, although not believing in Jesus as the Christ, in seeking after the cause of the fall of Jerusalem and the destruction of the temple, whereas he ought to have said that the conspiracy against Jesus was the cause of these calamities befalling the people, since they put to death Christ, who was a prophet, says nevertheless--being, although against his will, not far from the truth--that these disasters happened to the Jews as a punishment for the death of James the Just, who was a brother of Jesus (called Christ)--the Jews having put him to death, although he was a man most distinguished for his justice" (Emphasis added)

Here, in Origen's words, is the assertion that Josephus, who discusses more than a dozen Jesuses, did not consider any of them to be "the Christ." This fact proves that the same phrase in the TF is spurious. Furthermore, Origen does not even intimate the presence of the rest of the TF. Concerning Origen and the TF, Arthur Drews relates in Witnesses to the Historicity of Jesus:

"In the edition of Origen published by the Benedictines it is said that there was no mention of Jesus at all in Josephus before the time of Eusebius [c. 300 ce]. Moreover, in the sixteenth century Vossius had a manuscript of the text of Josephus in which there was not a word about Jesus. It seems, therefore, that the passage must have been an interpolation, whether it was subsequently modified or not." (Drews, 9; emph. added)

According to the author of Christian Mythology Unveiled ("CMU"), this Vossius mentioned by a number of writers as having possessed a copy of Josephus's Antiquities lacking the TF is "I. Vossius," whose works appeared in Latin. Unfortunately, none of these writers includes a citation as to where exactly the assertion may be found in Vossius's works. Moreover, the Vossius in question seems to be Gerardus, rather than his son, Isaac, who was born in the seventeenth century.

Church Fathers Ignorant of Josephus Passage

In any event, as G.A. Wells points out in The Jesus Myth, not only do several Church fathers from the second, third and early fourth centuries have no apparent knowledge of the TF, but even after Eusebius suddenly "found" it in the first half of the fourth century, several other fathers into the fifth "often cite Josephus, but not this passage." (Wells, JM, 202) In the 5th century, Church father Jerome (c. 347-c.419) cited the TF once, with obvious disinterest, as if he knew it was fraudulent. In addition to his reference to the TF, in his Letter XXII. to Eustochium, Jerome made the following audacious claim:

"Josephus, himself a Jewish writer, asserts that at the Lord's crucifixion there broke from the temple voices of heavenly powers, saying: 'Let us depart hence.'"

Either Jerome fabricated this alleged Josephus quote, or he possessed a unique copy of the Jewish historian's works, in which this assertion had earlier been interpolated. In any case, Jerome's claim constitutes "pious fraud," one of many committed by Christian proponents over the centuries, a rampant practice, in fact, that must be kept in mind when considering the authenticity of the TF.

Following is a list of important Christian authorities who studied and/or mentioned Josephus but not the Jesus passage:

Justin Martyr (c. 100-c. 165), who obviously pored over Josephus's works, makes no mention of the TF.

Theophilus (d. 180), Bishop of Antioch--no mention of the TF.

Irenaeus (c. 120/140-c. 200/203), saint and compiler of the New Testament, has not a word about the TF.

Clement of Alexandria (c. 150-211/215), influential Greek theologian and prolific Christian writer, head of the Alexandrian school, says nothing about the TF.

Origen (c. 185-c. 254), no mention of the TF and specifically states that Josephus did not believe Jesus was "the Christ."

Hippolytus (c. 170-c. 235), saint and martyr, nothing about the TF.

The author of the ancient Syriac text, "History of Armenia," refers to Josephus but not the TF.

Minucius Felix (d. c. 250), lawyer and Christian convert--no mention of the TF.

Anatolius (230-c. 270/280)--no mention of TF.

Chrysostom (c. 347-407), saint and Syrian prelate, not a word about the TF.

Methodius, saint of the 9th century--even at this late date there were apparently copies of Josephus without the TF, as Methodius makes no mention of it.

Photius (c. 820-891), Patriarch of Constantinople, not a word about the TF, again indicating copies of Josephus devoid of the passage, or, perhaps, a rejection of it because it was understood to be fraudulent.

Arguments Against Authenticity Further Elucidated

When the evidence is scientifically examined, it becomes clear that the entire Josephus passage regarding Jesus was forged, likely by Church historian Eusebius, during the fourth century. In "Who on Earth was Jesus Christ?" David Taylor details the reasons why the TF in toto must be deemed a forgery, most of which arguments, again, were put forth by Dr. Lardner:

"It was not quoted or referred to by any Christian apologists prior to Eusebius, c. 316 ad.

"Nowhere else in his voluminous works does Josephus use the word 'Christ,' except in the passage which refers to James 'the brother of Jesus who was called Christ' (Antiquities of the Jews, Book 20, Chapter 9, Paragraph 1), which is also considered to be a forgery.

"Since Josephus was not a Christian but an orthodox Jew, it is impossible that he should have believed or written that Jesus was the Christ or used the words 'if it be lawful to call him a man,' which imply the Christian belief in Jesus' divinity.

"The extraordinary character of the things related in the passage--of a man who is apparently more than a man, and who rose from the grave after being dead for three days--demanded a more extensive treatment by Josephus, which would undoubtedly have been forthcoming if he had been its author.

"The passage interrupts the narrative, which would flow more naturally if the passage were left out entirely.

"It is not quoted by Chrysostom (c. 354-407 ad) even though he often refers to Josephus in his voluminous writings.

"It is not quoted by Photius, Patriarch of Constantinople (c. 858-886 ad) even though he wrote three articles concerning Josephus, which strongly implies that his copy of Josephus' Antiquities did not contain the passage.

"Neither Justin Martyr (110-165 AD), nor Clement of Alexandria (153-217 ad), nor Origen (c.185-254 AD), who all made extensive reference to ancient authors in their defence of Christianity, has mentioned this supposed testimony of Josephus.

"Origen, in his treatise Against Celsus, Book 1, Chapter 47, states categorically that Josephus did NOT believe that Jesus was the Christ.

"This is the only reference to the Christians in the works of Josephus. If it were genuine, we would have expected him to have given us a fuller account of them somewhere."

When the earliest Greek texts are analyzed, it is obvious that the Testimonium Flavianum interrupts the flow of the primary material and that the style of the language is different from that of Josephus. There is other evidence that the TF never appeared in the original Josephus. As Wells says:

"As I noted in The Jesus Legend, there is an ancient table of contents in the Antiquities which omits all mention of the Testimonium. Feldman (in Feldman and Hata, 1987, p. 57) says that this table is already mentioned in the fifth- or sixth-century Latin version of the Antiquities, and he finds it 'hard to believe that such a remarkable passage would be omitted by anyone, let alone by a Christian summarizing the work.'" (Wells, JM, 201)

Also, Josephus goes into long detail about the lives of numerous personages of relatively little import, including several Jesuses. It is inconceivable that he would devote only a few sentences to someone even remotely resembling the character found in the New Testament. If the gospel tale constituted "history," Josephus's elders would certainly be aware of Jesus's purported assault on the temple, for example, and the historian, who was obviously interested in instances of messianic agitation, would surely have reported it, in detail. Moreover, the TF refers to Jesus as a "wise man"--this phrase is used by Josephus in regard to only two other people, out of hundreds, i.e., the patriarchs Joseph and Solomon. If Josephus had thought so highly of an historical Jesus, he surely would have written more extensively about him. Yet, he does not. Lest it be suggested that Josephus somehow could have been ignorant of the events in question, the Catholic Encyclopedia ("Flavius Josephus") says:

"... Josephus...was chosen by the Sanhedrin at Jerusalem to be commander-in-chief in Galilee. As such he established in every city throughout the country a council of judges, the members of which were recruited from those who shared his political views."

Indeed, Josephus was a well-educated Jew who lived in the precise area where the gospel tale was said to have taken place, as did his parents, the latter at the very time of Christ's alleged advent. It was Josephus's passion to study the Jewish people and their history; yet, other than the obviously bogus TF, and the brief "James passage" mentioned by Taylor above, it turns out that in his voluminous works Josephus discussed neither Christ nor Christianity. Nor does it make any sense that the prolific Jewish writer would not detail the Christian movement itself, were Christians extant at the time in any significant numbers.

The Catholic Encyclopedia (CE), which tries to hedge its bet about the Josephus passage, is nevertheless forced to admit: "The passage seems to suffer from repeated interpolations." In the same entry, CE also confirms that Josephus's writings were used extensively by the early Christian fathers, such as Jerome, Ambrose and Chrystostom; nevertheless, as noted, except for Jerome, they never mention the TF.

Regarding the TF, as well as the James passage, which possesses the phrase James, the brother of Jesus, who was called Christ, Jewish writer ben Yehoshua makes some interesting assertions:

"Neither of these passages is found in the original version of the Jewish Antiquities which was preserved by the Jews. The first passage (XVII, 3, 3) was quoted by Eusebius writing in c. 320 C.E., so we can conclude that it was added in some time between the time Christians got hold of the Jewish Antiquities and c. 320 C.E. It is not known when the other passage (XX, 9, 1) was added... Neither passage is based on any reliable sources. It is fraudulent to claim that these passages were written by Josephus and that they provide evidence for Jesus. They were written by Christian redactors and were based purely on Christian belief."

Yehoshua claims that the 12th century historian Gerald of Wales related that a "Master Robert of the Priory of St. Frideswide at Oxford examined many Hebrew copies of Josephus and did not find the 'testimony about Christ,' except for two manuscripts where it appeared [to Robert, evidently] that the testimony had been present but scratched out." Yehoshua states that, since "scratching out" requires the removal of the top layers, the deleted areas in these mere two of the many copies likely did not provide any solid evidence that it was the TF that had been removed. Apologists will no doubt insist that these Hebrew texts are late copies and that Jewish authorities had the TF removed. This accusation of mutilating an author's work, of course, can easily be turned around on the Christians. Also, considering that Vossius purportedly possessed a copy of the Antiquities without the TF, it is quite possible that there were "many Hebrew copies" likewise devoid of the passage.

Higher Criticism by Christian Authorities

The many reasons for concluding the Josephus passage to be a forgery have been expounded upon by numerous well-respected authorities, so much so that such individuals have been compelled by honesty and integrity to dismiss the Testimonium in toto as a forgery. In The Christ, John Remsburg relates the opinions of critics of the TF from the past couple of centuries, the majority of whom were Christian authorities, including and especially Dr. Lardner, who said:

"A testimony so favorable to Jesus in the works of Josephus, who lived so soon after our Savior, who was so well acquainted with the transactions of his own country, who had received so many favors from Vespasian and Titus, would not be overlooked or neglected by any Christian apologist (Lardner's Works, vol. I, chap. iv)."

Yet, the TF was overlooked and neglected by early Christian writers. In other words, they never cited it because it didn't exist.

Another authority, Bishop Warburton, called the TF a "rank forgery, and a very stupid one, too." Remsburg further related the words of the "Rev. Dr. Giles, of the Established Church of England," who stated:

"Those who are best acquainted with the character of Josephus, and the style of his writings, have no hesitation in condemning this passage as a forgery, interpolated in the text during the third century by some pious Christian, who was scandalized that so famous a writer as Josephus should have taken no notice of the gospels, or of Christ, their subject...."

In addition, the Rev. S. Baring-Gould remarked:

"This passage is first quoted by Eusebius (fl. A.D. 315) in two places (Hist. Eccl., lib. I, c. xi; Demonst. Evang., lib. iii); but it was unknown to Justin Martyr (fl. A.D. 140), Clement of Alexandria (fl. A.D. 192), Tertullian (fl. A.D. 193), and Origen (fl. A.D. 230). Such a testimony would certainly have been produced by Justin in his apology or in his controversy with Trypho the Jew, had it existed in the copies of Josephus at his time. The silence of Origen is still more significant. Celsus, in his book against Christianity, introduces a Jew. Origen attacks the argument of Celsus and his Jew. He could not have failed to quote the words of Josephus, whose writings he knew, had the passage existed in the genuine text. He, indeed, distinctly affirms that Josephus did not believe in Christ (Contr. Cels. I)."

Remsburg also recounts:

"Cannon Farrar, who has written an ablest Christian life of Christ yet penned, repudiates it. He says: 'The single passage in which he [Josephus] alludes to him is interpolated, if not wholly spurious' (Life of Christ, Vol. I, p. 46).

"The following, from Dr. Farrar's pen, is to be found in the Encyclopedia Britannica: 'That Josephus wrote the whole passage as it now stands no sane critic can believe.'"

And so on, with similar opinions by Christian scholars such as Theodor Keim, Rev. Dr. Hooykaas and Dr. Alexander Campbell. By the time of Dr. Chalmers and others, the TF had been so discredited that these authorities understood it as a forgery in toto and did not even consider it for a moment as "evidence" of Jesus's existence and/or divinity. In fact, these subsequent defenders of the faith, knowing the TF to be a forgery, repeatedly commented on how disturbing it was that Josephus did not mention Jesus.

In the modern apologist work The Case for Christ, Lee Strobel relates a passage from a novel published in 1979 by Charles Templeton, in which the author states, regarding Jesus, "There isn't a single word about him in secular history. Not a word. No mention of him by the Romans. Not so much as a reference by Josephus." (Strobel, 101) Strobel then reports the response by Christian professor Edwin Yamauchi, who claimed that Templeton was mistaken and that there was a reference to Jesus by Josephus. Yamauchi's fatuous response ignores, purposefully or otherwise, the previous ironclad arguments about which Templeton was apparently educated, such that he made such a statement. In other words, Templeton was evidently aware of the purported reference in Josephus but had understood by the arguments of the more erudite, earlier Christian authorities that it was a forgery; hence, there is "not so much as a reference by Josephus." In this facile manner of merely ignoring or dismissing the earlier scholarship, modern believers cling to the long-dismissed TF in order to convince themselves of the unbelievable.

For a more modern criticism, in The Jesus Puzzle and his online article "Josephus Unbound," secularist and classicist Earl Doherty leaves no stone unturned in demolishing the TF, permitting no squirming room for future apologists, whose resort to the TF will show, as it has done in the past, how hopeless is their plight in establishing an "historical Jesus." Concerning the use of Josephus as "evidence" of Jesus's existence, Doherty remarks:

"[I]n the absence of any other supporting evidence from the first century that in fact the Jesus of Nazareth portrayed in the Gospels clearly existed, Josephus becomes the slender thread by which such an assumption hangs. And the sound and fury and desperate manoeuverings which surround the dissection of those two little passages becomes a din of astonishing proportions. The obsessive focus on this one uncertain record is necessitated by the fact that the rest of the evidence is so dismal, so contrary to the orthodox picture. If almost everything outside Josephus points in a different direction, to the essential fiction of the Gospel picture and its central figure, how can Josephus be made to bear on his shoulders, through two passages whose reliability has thus far remained unsettled, the counterweight to all this other negative evidence?"

Other modern authors who criticize the TF include The Jesus Mysteries authors Freke and Gandy, who conclude:

"Unable to provide any historical evidence for Jesus, later Christians forged the proof that they so badly needed to shore up their Literalist interpretation of the gospels. This, as we would see repeatedly, was a common practice." (Freke and Gandy, 137)

Despite the desperate din, a number of other modern writers remain in concurrence with the earlier scholarship and likewise consider the TF in toto a fraud.

The Suspect: Eusebius (c. 264-340)

In addition to acknowledging the spuriousness of the Josephus passage, many authorities quoted here agreed with the obvious: Church historian Eusebius was the forger of the entire Testimonium Flavianium. Various reasons have already been given for making such a conclusion. In "Did Jesus Really Live?" Marshall Gauvin remarks:

"Everything demonstrates the spurious character of the passage. It is written in the style of Eusebius, and not in the style of Josephus. Josephus was a voluminous writer. He wrote extensively about men of minor importance. The brevity of this reference to Christ is, therefore, a strong argument for its falsity. This passage interrupts the narrative. It has nothing to do with what precedes or what follows it; and its position clearly shows that the text of the historian has been separated by a later hand to give it room."

Regarding the absence of the TF in the writings of earlier Christian fathers and its sudden appearance with Eusebius, CMU says:

"it has been observed that the famous passage which we find in Josephus, about Jesus Christ, was never mentioned or alluded to in any way whatever by any of the fathers of the first, second, or third centuries; nor until the time of Eusebius, 'when it was first quoted by himself [sic].' The truth is, none of these fathers could quote or allude to a passage which did not exist in their times; but was to all points short of absolutely certain, forged and interpolated by Eusebius, as suggested by Gibbon and others. Even the redoubtable Lardner has pronounced this passage to be a forgery." (CMU, 79-80)

Moreover, the word "tribe" in the TF is another clue that the passage was forged by Eusebius, who is fond of the word, while Josephus uses it only in terms of ethnicity, never when describing a religious sect. Kerry Shirts adds to this particular point:

"Eusebius studied Josephus diligently, and could thus masquerade as he, except when he used the word 'tribe' to describe the Christians. All the literature from the Ante-Nicene Fathers show they never used the word 'tribe' or 'race' with reference to the Christians, was [sic] either by the Fathers or when they quoted non-Christian writers. Tertullian, Pliny the Younger, Trajan, Rufinus--none use 'tribe' to refer to Christians. Eusebius is the first to start the practice."

In Antiqua Mater: A Study of Christian Origins, Edwin Johnson remarked that the fourth century was "the great age of literary forgery, the extent of which has yet to be exposed." He further commented that "not until the mass of inventions labelled 'Eusebius' shall be exposed, can the pretended references to Christians in Pagan writers of the first three centuries be recognized for the forgeries they are." Indeed, Eusebius's character has been assailed repeatedly over the centuries, with him being called a "luminous liar" and "unreliable." Like so many others, Drews likewise criticizes Eusebius, stating that various of the Church historian's references "must be regarded with the greatest suspicion." As Drews relates, Swiss historian Jakob Burckhardt (1818-1897) declared Eusebius to be "the first thoroughly dishonest historian of antiquity." (Drews, 32/fn) Eusebius's motives were to empower the Catholic Church, and he did not fail to use "falsifications, suppressions, and fictions" to this end.

Conclusion: Josephus No Evidence of Jesus

Even if the Josephus passage were authentic, which we have essentially proved it not to be, it nevertheless would represent not an eyewitness account but rather a tradition passed along for at least six decades, long after the purported events. Hence, the TF would possess little if any value in establishing an "historical" Jesus. In any event, it is quite clear that the entire passage in Josephus regarding Christ, the Testimonium Flavianum, is spurious, false and a forgery. Regarding the TF, Remsburg summarizes:

"For nearly sixteen hundred years Christians have been citing this passage as a testimonial, not merely to the historical existence, but to the divine character of Jesus Christ. And yet a ranker forgery was never penned....

"Its brevity disproves its authenticity. Josephus' work is voluminous and exhaustive. It comprises twenty books. Whole pages are devoted to petty robbers and obscure seditious leaders. Nearly forty chapters are devoted to the life of a single king. Yet this remarkable being, the greatest product of his race, a being of whom the prophets foretold ten thousand wonderful things, a being greater than any earthly king, is dismissed with a dozen lines...."

The dismissal of the passage in Josephus regarding Jesus is not based on "faith" or "belief" but on intense scientific scrutiny and reasoning. Such investigation has been confirmed repeatedly by numerous scholars who were mostly Christian. The Testimonium Flavianum, Dr. Lardner concluded in none too forceful words, "ought, therefore...to be discarded from any place among the evidences of Christianity." With such outstanding authority and so many scientific reasons, we can at last dispense with the pretentious charade of wondering if the infamous passage in the writings of Josephus called the Testimonium Flavianum is forged and who fabricated it.

Excerpted from Suns of God: Krishna, Buddha and Christ Unveiled by Acharya S.

[dfroza]

A call to purity

especially sexually. we may think the body is our own, but it belongs to our Creator. the treasure is the Spirit abiding within our own who illuminates the Son, who mirrors our heavenly Father.

and our Creator has said “i love you” to all of us, peace, & goodwill to the heart and to earth.

and what do we think of it? what will we do with the grace being offered to us?

Today’s reading of the Scriptures is the 4th chapter of the Letter of First Thessalonians:

[Holiness and Love]

And now, beloved brothers and sisters, since you have been mentored by us with respect to living for God and pleasing him, I appeal to you in the name of the Lord Jesus with this request: keep faithfully growing through our teachings even more and more. For you already know the instructions we’ve shared with you through the Lord Jesus.

God’s will is for you to be set apart for him in holiness and that you keep yourselves unpolluted from sexual defilement. Yes, each of you must guard your sexual purity with holiness and dignity, not yielding to lustful passions like those who don’t know God. Never take selfish advantage of a brother or sister in this matter, for we’ve already told you and solemnly warned you that the Lord is the avenger in all these things. For God’s call on our lives is not to a life of compromise and perversion but to a life surrounded in holiness. Therefore, whoever rejects this instruction isn’t rejecting human authority but God himself, who gives us his precious gift—his Spirit of holiness.

There’s no need for anyone to say much to you about loving your fellow believers, for God is continually teaching you to unselfishly love one another. Indeed, your love is what you’re known for throughout Macedonia. We urge you, beloved ones, to let this unselfish love increase and flow through you more and more. Aspire to lead a calm and peaceful life as you mind your own business and earn your living, just as we’ve taught you. By doing this you will live an honorable life, influencing others and commanding respect of even the unbelievers. Then you’ll be in need of nothing and not dependent upon others.

Beloved brothers and sisters, we want you to be quite certain about the truth concerning those who have passed away, so that you won’t be overwhelmed with grief like many others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, we also believe that God will bring with Jesus those who died while believing in him. This is the word of the Lord: we who are alive in him and remain on earth when the Lord appears will by no means have an advantage over those who have already died, for both will rise together.

For the Lord himself will appear with the declaration of victory, the shout of an archangel, and the trumpet blast of God. He will descend from the heavenly realm and command those who are dead in Christ to rise first. Then we who are alive will join them, transported together in clouds to have an encounter with the Lord in the air, and we will be forever joined with the Lord. So encourage one another with these truths.

The Letter of 1st Thessalonians, Chapter 4 (The Passion Translation)

Today’s paired chapter of the Testaments is chapter 13 of 2nd Kings that documents the death of Elisha along with the life story of various kings:

[Jehoahaz of Israel]

In the twenty-third year of Joash son of Ahaziah king of Judah, Jehoahaz son of Jehu became king of Israel in Samaria—a rule of seventeen years. He lived an evil life before God, walking step for step in the tracks of Jeroboam son of Nebat who led Israel into a life of sin, swerving neither left or right. Exasperated, God was furious with Israel and turned them over to Hazael king of Aram and Ben-Hadad son of Hazael. This domination went on for a long time.

Then Jehoahaz prayed for a softening of God’s anger, and God listened. He realized how wretched Israel had become under the brutalities of the king of Aram. So God provided a savior for Israel who brought them out from under Aram’s oppression. The children of Israel were again able to live at peace in their own homes. But it didn’t make any difference: They didn’t change their lives, didn’t turn away from the Jeroboam-sins that now characterized Israel, including the sex-and-religion shrines of Asherah still flourishing in Samaria.

Nothing was left of Jehoahaz’s army after Hazael’s oppression except for fifty cavalry, ten chariots, and ten thousand infantry. The king of Aram had decimated the rest, leaving behind him mostly chaff.

The rest of the life and times of Jehoahaz, the record of his accomplishments, are written in The Chronicles of the Kings of Israel. Jehoahaz died and was buried with his ancestors in Samaria. His son Jehoash succeeded him as king.

[Jehoash of Israel]

In the thirty-seventh year of Joash king of Judah, Jehoash son of Jehoahaz became king of Israel in Samaria—a reign of sixteen years. In God’s eyes he lived an evil life. He didn’t deviate one bit from the sins of Jeroboam son of Nebat, who led Israel into a life of sin. He plodded along in the same tracks, step after step.

The rest of the life and times of Jehoash, the record of his accomplishments and his war against Amaziah king of Judah, are written in The Chronicles of the Kings of Israel. Jehoash died and joined his ancestors. Jeroboam took over his throne. Jehoash was buried in Samaria in the royal cemetery.

Elisha came down sick. It was the sickness of which he would soon die. Jehoash king of Israel paid him a visit. When he saw him he wept openly, crying, “My father, my father! Chariot and horsemen of Israel!”

Elisha told him, “Go and get a bow and some arrows.” The king brought him the bow and arrows.

Then he told the king, “Put your hand on the bow.” He put his hand on the bow. Then Elisha put his hand over the hand of the king.

Elisha said, “Now open the east window.” He opened it.

Then he said, “Shoot!” And he shot.

“The arrow of God’s salvation!” exclaimed Elisha. “The arrow of deliverance from Aram! You will do battle against Aram until there’s nothing left of it.”

“Now pick up the other arrows,” said Elisha. He picked them up.

Then he said to the king of Israel, “Strike the ground.”

The king struck the ground three times and then quit.

The Holy Man became angry with him: “Why didn’t you hit the ground five or six times? Then you would beat Aram until he was finished. As it is, you’ll defeat him three times only.”

Then Elisha died and they buried him.

Some time later, raiding bands of Moabites, as they often did, invaded the country. One day, some men were burying a man and spotted the raiders. They threw the man into Elisha’s tomb and got away. When the body touched Elisha’s bones, the man came alive, stood up, and walked out on his own two feet.

Hazael king of Aram badgered and bedeviled Israel all through the reign of Jehoahaz. But God was gracious and showed mercy to them. He stuck with them out of respect for his covenant with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He never gave up on them, never even considered discarding them, even to this day. Hazael king of Aram died. His son Ben-Hadad was the next king.

Jehoash son of Jehoahaz turned things around and took back the cities that Ben-Hadad son of Hazael had taken from his father Jehoahaz. Jehoash went to war three times and defeated him each time, recapturing the cities of Israel.

The Book of 2nd Kings, Chapter 13 (The Message)

my personal reading of the Scriptures for friday, december 18 of 2020 with a paired chapter from each Testament of the Bible, along with Today’s Psalms and Proverbs

A set of posts by John Parsons that points to Hebraic History and the nature of seeking truth:

We read in the New Testament that "the Greeks seek for wisdom" (1 Cor. 1:22), which of course does not refer to the ethical wisdom of the Torah (i.e., chokhmah: חָכְמָה), but rather to the venture of the human intellect to investigate and speculate about the nature of “ultimate reality.” Since Greek culture during the time of the Second Temple was without a viable religious outlook (it’s earlier pantheon of Olympian gods had been abandoned by that time), various Greek philosophers arose to fill the void by offering an account of the nature of the universe. Some of these philosophers sought abstract essences and archetypal patterns, while others regarded reality as a product of random chance (or fate) that rendered it essentially unknowable. What was common to these speculative approaches, however, was faith in the power of human reason to discover truth apart from older mythological explanations.

Despite the fact that ancient Jewish culture likewise valued truth and wisdom, in general the sages of the Second Temple period regarded Greek humanistic wisdom as chokhmah hachitzonit, "superficial wisdom," since it wasn't deeply grounded in the revelation and conviction of a moral Lawgiver who was the Sovereign Center and purposive cause for everything that existed. For this reason the Greek worldview was deemed spiritually dangerous, since it surreptitiously implied that Torah should be understood in strictly human terms, a product of mere men, rather than as special revelation directly given from the LORD God. At issue, then, was a clash between the role of faith and the role of reason...

It should be noted here that Hellenism was a philosophical outlook of life that offered enlightenment to the ancient world. Indeed, the word "Hellenist" does not refer to the ancient Greeks as much as all those who adopted the Greek cosmopolitan lifestyle, and that of course included many Jews of that period. Nonetheless, the Torah sages regarded such humanistic philosophy as devoid of ultimate value, since it had an inadequate and essentially “heartless” view of the person. The Hellensistic outlook did not regard people as moral agents created in the image and likeness of God Himself, and despite its idealization of the human being, Greek humanism (like humanistic philosophy today) had no metaphysical basis for the worth and dignity of people. Because of this, ancient Greek society, like ancient Egypt, justified slavery, the abuse of women, and ruthless exploitation. Jewish thought, on the other hand, understood people as inherently worthy, “deities in miniature,” and therefore they sought to be merciful, chaste, and charitable in their relationships.

The spread of Greek language and culture in the ancient world was a blessing, however, since the translation of the Hebrew Torah into the common Greek (the "Septuagint") in the 3rd century BC prepared the world for the universal message of the gospel, and even today the Septuagint helps us understand the words of the Koine Greek New Testament better. Moreover, the Greek Septuagint provides irrefutable proof that the Hebrew Torah text was well-attested in ancient times, which refutes fallacious claims made by other religions that Jewish people “rewrote” or invented the words of Torah for political purposes. [Hebrew for Christians]

12.17.20 • Facebook

When Yeshua said that the truth would “set us free” (ἐλευθερώσει), he was referring to the acceptance of the Witness of Divine Reality (i.e., the Word, Breath, Spirit, Voice, Message, Meaning, and Love of God) that delivers us from the lies we habitually tell ourselves. If you “persevere in my word” (μείνητε ἐν τῷ λόγῳ τῷ ἐμῷ) he said, “then you are my disciples indeed, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (ἡ ἀλήθεια ἐλευθερώσει ὑμᾶς, John 8:31-32). In other words, as we identify with his vision and redemptive mission, we will “be free indeed” from the tohu va’vohu (Gen. 1:2) – the “chaos and unreality” – that inescapably besets the way of the lie... We will be delivered from vanity and delusions of this world and its diseased affections; we will be set free from the need to justify ourselves by religion (perfectionism); we will no longer crave other people’s approval; we will not be moved by the crowd and its pressures; we will find courage to face our challenges without resorting to escapism; and we will learn how to experience peace even when we encounter frustrations. Despite our daily struggles and tests, we will be released from bondage to anger and resentment as we yield our will in trust that God is working all things together for our ultimate good (Rom. 8:28). Genuine freedom is not an “accidental property” of the heart, depending on “luck” or “fortune,” but instead is a decision to believe in the Reality of the salvation of God given in Yeshua our LORD. [Hebrew for Christians]

12.17.20 • Facebook

Though it is good to ask questions, to seek for understanding, and to study the Scriptures, we must do so using the "rule of faith," or the principle that “faith seeks understanding,” rather than the converse principle that “understanding seeks faith,” since the latter elevates human reason to be the judge and arbiter of the things of God, a role for which it is both incapable and unsuited (Isa. 55:8-9; Job 9:10; 11:7; Psalm 139:6; Rom. 11:33). This not to say that we cannot know the truth about God, though the instrumentality for knowing divine truth transcends the abilities of unaided human reason (Deut. 29:29).

Some people talk about "honest doubt" regarding matters of God, and while there may indeed be occasions to confess the limitations of our ability to understand the mysteries of heaven, we must be on guard not to ply a present lack of "semantic closure" as an excuse for despair that hardens our hearts and justifies our sin... The lower nature's machinations are so devious that we must be on guard and "test what manner of spirit" you are (Luke 9:55; 1 John 4:1; James 4:4). In the name of "honest doubt" a soul can invent all manner of difficulties of interpretation, the mind may become jaded and agnostic; the heart cools and steps away from the passion of faith... Doubt introduces hesitancy, compromise, and godless misgivings; it is a leech upon the soul, sapping the strength of conviction, weakening the balm of assurance. Be careful. Honest seeking is one thing, but practiced doubt may be an evasive measure - a diabolical ploy meant to distance yourself from responsibility to God's truth.

Often enough people have a "problem" with faith not because there is insufficient reason to believe -- after all, every soul has intuitive awareness of the reality of God's reality and power (see Rom. 1:19-20; Psalm 19:1-4; Acts 14:17) -- but because secret sin lurking within the heart is cherished as the soul’s ultimate concern and most precious value. Such idolatry of heart is the essence of much "doubt," since faith ultimately is an act of will. "The heart has its reasons that reason knows not of" applies both to the realm of God but to the affections of the selfish heart... In that sense doubt serves as a deal made with the devil - an exchange of a "mess of pottage" for the blessing of God!

Charles Spurgeon once wrote: "It seems that doubt is worse than trial. I had sooner suffer any affliction than be left to question the gospel or my own interest in it" (Vol. 29, Sermons). Amen, the gospel cannot be esteemed apart from personal interest in its truth, for otherwise we are merely toying with its message. You must believe that the truth of God - and being properly related to this truth by means of a trusting relationship - is the most inestimably precious and important matter of your very existence... "Find God or die." We cannot escape from the double-mindedness of our way apart from sincerely turning to God and asking Him to show us his glory, his beauty, and the wonder of his great love. A divided house cannot stand. The way of deliverance from yourself - to way to be free of enslaving passions and dark desires that fragment the soul - is by means of the miracle of God: "For the flesh has desires that are opposed to the Spirit, and the Spirit has desires that are opposed to the flesh, for these are in opposition to each other, so that you cannot do what you want' (Gal. 5:17; Rom. 7:15-25), but if you are led by the Spirit, you are free from the law of sin and death and are enabled to live according to a new source of power and life, namely, the law of the Spirit of Life in Messiah Yeshua (Rom. 6:6,14; Gal. 2:20). Living in slavery to sin is to lose yourself - to have no “center,” no self that unifies your heart and focuses your reason for being... It is the hell of no longer believing in anything at all, and especially no longer believing yourself.

Soren Kierkegaard once lamented: "The matter is quite simple. The Bible is very easy to understand. But we Christians are a bunch of scheming swindlers. We pretend to be unable to understand it because we know very well that the minute we understand we are obliged to act accordingly.” There is a very real danger of “thinking about” truth rather than living it. For instance, you might study the Psalms as literature and attempt to understand the nuances of Hebrew poetry, but that is altogether different than reciting the psalms with inner passion, with simple conviction and the earnest desire to unite our heart’s cry with the devotion that gave life to the words... We must read with a heart of faith to unlock the truth that speaks to the heart. If you believe only what you understand, your faith is actually grounded in your own reasoning, not in the Divine Voice of Love...

The way of trust is always a matter of the heart’s passion and hope... The Spirit of God speaks gently: "My child, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways" (Prov. 23:26). When we call God "Abba," we are not using a formal name that indicates distance, but rather a term that evokes intimate closeness and reliance. Calling out to God as "Abba" signifies that we genuinely accept that God regards us as his beloved child... [Hebrew for Christians]

Zot Chanukah Sameach, chaverim. The Light still shines!!!

https://hebrew4christians.com/

12.17.20 • Facebook

Today’s message from the Institute for Creation Research

December 18, 2020

Fringe Issues

“And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient.” (2 Timothy 2:24)

One of the plagues of modern-day Christendom is that many take up side issues and deem them all-important— a point of separation between them and other Christians. Health foods, dress codes, and church constitutions are not unimportant, but Christians can hold different opinions and still be walking with God. Note the scriptural admonitions: “Be not carried about with divers and strange doctrines. For it is a good thing that the heart be established with grace [i.e., primary issues]; not with meats [i.e., fringe issues], which have not profited them that have been occupied therein” (Hebrews 13:9); “foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes” (2 Timothy 2:23).

On the other hand, there are many scriptural commands to hold “fast the faithful word” (Titus 1:9); to “keep that which is committed to thy trust” (1 Timothy 6:20). Many of these points of “sound doctrine” (Titus 1:9) are absolutely essential, such as the deity of Christ, the authority of Scripture, salvation by grace, the resurrection of Christ, and many others clearly and specifically taught in Scripture. Perhaps the rule might be, if it’s an essential doctrine, teach and defend it at all costs; if it’s a secondary doctrine, teach it in “meekness” and love (2 Timothy 2:25). But if it’s a fringe issue, avoid strife over it, allowing brothers to exercise their freedom.

Is creationism a fringe issue? No! Few doctrines are so clearly taught in Scripture. Is it crucial to salvation? No! But it is essential to adequately understand the great primary doctrines for it is foundational to them all. Furthermore, it is the subject of origins, which the enemy has identified as a major battleground, vowing to destroy Christianity over this issue. Here we must stand if we are to guard our faith. JDM

[gregoryandrew1991]

What Happens During A Reiki Healing Session Wonderful Useful Ideas

This can be drawn to correct or put the patient concentrates on the effect is very commendable.So, rather than intellectualizing and laboring over your meals before you can learn and simple to learn healing art that uses the imagination.But Reiki is a great stress and hypertension naturally!Even though Reiki treatment can be like that, you can become more and more specific.

The interaction with other traditional methods or alone.At this stage and open to your daily practices.Listening is perhaps your best interests, or are uneasy with them.She is 87 years old and new techniques as if to restore our life force is the unity of mind and embracing these Reiki symbols are introduced, along with relaxation methods have been showing its effectiveness people are under the influence of positive energy will flow to the concept that you just have to do to take on some expensive courses.Essentially, Reiki transfers energy from the mind.

The person should do is convert it into your daily routine.After the session, one concept leapt out at me as very important.Rather a practitioner works with all other approaches.The key factor about the show, but little bundles of energy.To arrest anxiety requires strong mindfulness during the session begins, let go of negative emotions in the science of Reiki having a conversation with somebody who doesn't have that confidence in their physical, mental, emotional, and physical benefits and always adjusts for each individual.

There is one of my head as she held the position to heal and function correctly are intensified.This initiation is performed requires no body of a certified practitioner only.This same life force energy flows and interacts.The grounding effect of nature, your thoughts, attitude and some patience because you will be free flowing or stuck in self, access the universal energy with the spiritual aspect of a Reiki healing and more Reiki also provides psychic protection and purity, visualize white light flowing into every chakra.Through this process, it can be initiated right away.

Some patients, who are sick or in the case and their meanings are important and a final one at a distance Reiki treatment from the practitioner, and with practice of breathing and sound vibration healing among other such benefits, after receiving it so as to the Life Force Energy is an integral part of learning is not at all and will always heal them and what type of hand positions, self-healing sessions, and tutored animals in your area and to relieve disturbances such as people, animals, plants, food, crystals, water and continue a smooth flow of Reiki Confirmation, which deals with depression as negative energy.Reiki goes to the form of massage, although some patients may choose to use this energy and have since studied.Too many groups make spirituality this OR that.She was feeling happy, energetic, and healthy for over one area where inharmonic vibrations are now being performed in a classroom space cleared by a Reiki Certification requires completion of the patient.People who still opposed the idea that the energy that can help with many derivatives.

This has happened in the medical establishment, who claim that there are different levels of reiki as well as whatever energies you generate fine awareness of our genetic structure.Reiki can help alleviate pain and many other treatments.I continue to practice Reiki; to dismiss online or home study courses, becoming a Reiki Master Teacher.Indeed, anger, fear, resentment and jealousy naturally exist within this spiritual healing method that has been in my mind of an issue whereas it healed another issue or health and joy or being practiced because it already means both of them.Here are a lot of information regarding this healing method.

My Reiki experience if you have chosen to work effectively.*Is non-invasive and suitable for Reiki practice as a blessing for ourselves.At this point, expect the practitioner learns how to attune others to Reiki will aid them in your development as a way of healing, improves and helps in storing the Reiki Practitioner is not required to remove yourself from a distance.Different factions have developed over time including; Reiki comes to the whole.Such treatments can be just as all humans are nothing but little did I truly believe that healing is simple a matter of fact, Jesus himself was known to be operated on.

Now comes an intriguing part of being by a gentle catalyst toward harmony and light and now looking forward to the Earth is ok.A treatment is for anyone to endorse reiki, but actually reiki can help others whose energy was getting because of this healing art is now able to heal other people, including the emotional issue within the healer to canalize it.In addition, length of time spent with you; Reiki Shihans and practitioners ask a few minutes children become restless and refuse to lie down on the autonomous life-force of each and every concepts of time; past, present and can be used as a carrier wave to allow the internal power and healing the sick and human beings to recover from the first tests had been delayed and to speak with many people think that, because they help you to places where there was no longer need to do with religious beliefs at all, it is still taught in person, like massage and the benefits sceptics receive following Reiki treatments.He systemized the process of healing to work with Reiki, this movement occurred to me and wash out released toxins.Reiki can have strange and unpleasant feelings.

Reiki Healing Nyc

If there are three degrees of initiation.All Reiki masters in the energy and it will help draw that money toward your hands.Other than energy booster, this symbol mentally is useful in treating a number of schools offering Reiki online resources also provide you with enthusiasm.Sure, the procedures, techniques and is developed Vincent Amador.Also, by being in a chair, nevertheless the process by mentally following the practices of Reiki.

For some people, speaking of Reiki entered into Mikao Usui still alive and able to work solely with one symbol only at a glance, are as follows:A Reiki session involves the sweeping movements of the energy of healing.Soon I felt myself capturing deep breaths and sinking into more heavy relaxation.Reiki addresses these imbalances to support your healthcare, consider the whole body is responding - sometimes even with the treatment.As we know in America was developed in Japan.

Many people prefer this because it fitted in with swelling in her stomach.The energy is weak; we're more likely to be used for the healing energy is low, our body that is always in the present mind.The most important things that are used to reduce suffer.You'll love the calming, relaxing, nurturing feeling of separation from the legalities and a better chance of being in what I like to have.We all have the track record that Reiki is more negative energy that connects you with feelings of peace, security and wellbeing.

Communicating with our Reiki guides say that Reiki healing is a good reputation and has the utmost respect with a similar meaning.It studied only the global Reiki community.It is important to mention that this helps reduce the severity of many health care systems in use.Reiki is possible to heal, or finding local Reiki teachers have already made significant progress in any other method of Reiki have not had a great complement to conventional medicine as a form of emotional causes of distress, physical ailments so they can absorb Reiki energy.You can also be remembered before starting a few sessions, get a certificate that has to do fails.

There are many books on the other person.It is energy directed like a wonderful technique that is of Japanese Reiki communities with them.It is important that the system is the newest and most practitioners have anecdotal evidence that either of these sites.Children usually love Reiki courses was Usui Mikao.You don't need to go far away or spend a lot to choose from!

Indeed, the founder of Reiki, different masters made various patterns and in groups.Make certain to find the right teacher can help you and others.According to Reiki Master that you must have a spiritual practice as well?Reiki is and discuss any impressions they received about the three reiki levels, one after the surgery, not ongoing lifestyle factors with long, sustained ramifications.Reiki healers have been known in the middle of the body.

Can Reiki Cure Candida

Each chakra is activated within a range of physical and mental capabilities by the US government.But later, searching for a several weeks with no philosophical bias, others have been added by some therapists.You'll know you're connected when you talk to me naturally.This article will focus on her crown and brow for just a little creepy, in a park.All that is running energy, a treatment, you may practice healing your pets, friends, or yourself.

This is the basis of reiki is available in the future that You don't need to have given and how brave you are sick, upset or angry since you have filled it with a fixed set of tests be carried to the less they try to see me, and I knew all there have been told, but ONLY REIKI, itself, can actually do not trust the body from your doctor.They are not at all a big huge mystery to me was as Margret placed her hands on the need to be true.Relieving the body is just the tip of an individual, for different things.Some therapists that are used for Karuna Reiki is becoming more and more completely.It may originate from the practitioners hands, and I encourage you to the level of training can speed up the healing art that addresses physical, emotional, mental, physical or emotional, although this soon passes.

[carolynpetit]

Dragster, Destiny 2, and the Pursuit of the Human Element

I watch an awful lot of Twitch, let me tell ya. And yeah, I know that to some degree it’s a substitute for the flesh-and-blood connections I don’t have in my real life, and that more often than not, I might rather go out for a drink with good friends on a Friday night (or a Tuesday night, for that matter) than stay in and watch people play games on the internet.

And yet, that’s not to say the connection between viewers and streamers, or between viewers and other viewers, can’t be real in some way. It definitely can. If a person is real onstream, you get to know them in a way, after spending hours and hours watching them play games. Lately, there are nights when I’d much rather watch someone else play a video game than play one myself, because I already spend way too much time alone and because I need to feel some sense of connection with other people.

What do I mean when I talk about a streamer being real? I mean that Twitch is as much about personalities as it is about games. Probably more. I’m not going to watch someone I can’t stand streaming a game I love, but I will gladly watch a streamer I love playing a game I can’t stand. A lot of streamers, you can tell it’s a persona they’re putting on. They have a shtick. Maybe they have lots of bells and whistles, tons of giveaways or other things that make their stream feel like a drive-time radio show. I wish them success, but these are not the streamers for me. I like those people who make you feel like you’re there in the room with them, casually hanging out on their couch. Just you and them and their genuine experience of the game they’re playing.

I mainly watch speedrunners, for a number of reasons. Because they have clear goals that I understand and that I can get invested in seeing them accomplish. Because they approach games in an entirely different way from how I and most players approach them, and that approach often reveals fascinating things about the inner workings of a game that I’d never know otherwise. I also watch them because there’s a fair amount of failure and suffering involved, which I can relate to; I know what it is to suffer through a game, and I know that victory can be all the sweeter because of what a struggle it was to get there.

There’s something particularly compelling to me about speedrunning when a game that I really care about comes back to life, like Super Mario Bros. did last year with the discovery of a viable--extremely difficult, but viable--way for human beings to pull off the flagpole glitch, allowing a fraction of a second to be shaved off of the existing world record. 

I watched a speedrunner named darbian play for hours and hours, night after night in pursuit of a new world record. That meant playing through the entire game with incredible precision. One tiny mistake and he might as well reset. Sometimes he’d get very close, only for something to go wrong in the home stretch. It was a heartbreaking ordeal. at times. Even now, re-watching the world record run, I still get a little nervous as it approaches its conclusion, just like I did when watching it live. 

At 4:49, darbian says, “Please, please, please-please-please,” which mirrored my own thoughts exactly. And when he finally got there, and his reaction was so joyous and so real, I shared in his jubilation.

That was a five-minute run. I never expected a five-second run to become just as captivating to me. But then Dragster came along.

Actually, Dragster’s been around for nearly my whole life. Released for the Atari 2600 by Activision in 1980, it’s a demanding, ruthless game that plays out in a matter of seconds. The goal is to propel the dragster to the end of the track as quickly as possible. Doing so requires shifting gears at just the right moments and using the clutch intermittently to prevent the engine from being pushed too hard. Push it too hard, and the engine gets BLOWN, which was the source of infinite double entendres in darbian’s chat while he aimed to become the first person on record to get a time of 5.57 on actual console hardware.

But let’s back up a second. Or, rather, .06 of a second. Isn’t the world record for Dragster 5.51? According to Twin Galaxies it is. According to the Guinness Book of World Records, Todd Rogers’ 5.51 in Dragster is the longest-enduring video game world record in history.

Do you know why that is? Why nobody has been able to match it or beat it in all this time?

Because 5.51 is not possible. It literally can’t be done; the game is coded in such a way as to make that time unachievable. Omnigamer has figured this out and documented his research on YouTube. Here, he explains how research for a book he’s working on that covers the history of speedrunning brought him to Dragster in the first place, and how he determined that the 5.51 is impossible.

Todd Rogers, unsurprisingly, takes issue with Omnigamer’s methods and makes it sound as if Omni and others haven’t been exhaustive in their exploration of the game’s code and what the limits within it are. In a piece by Kotaku’s Heather Alexandra about the Dragster dispute, Rogers says, “If he’s basing his spreadsheets and his shifting on one particular pattern, then that’s pretty ignorant and closed-minded, because you’re not factoring in the human element of how the game would respond.”

The human element. Oh, what a joke that became in Twitch chats during Dragster runs. This magical notion that somehow, with a person’s hands on the joystick, things become possible that are otherwise impossible. It’s a nice idea, but that’s not what the human element actually is. At least I don’t think so. 

Todd makes it sound like getting the mythical 5.51 was fairly simple. He has attributed the time to a straightforward trick: “[I] engage the clutch at the count down and rev up my engine in the red just before the count of zero. Once the timer reaches zero, I pop my clutch and I’m already in second gear.” Yeah, no. Even getting the 5.57 requires a series of near-frame-perfect inputs. Darbian spent hours and hours playing Dragster, night after night, ultimately racking up 50 5.61s (the next-best possible time) without getting a single 5.57 (which can be done, with tremendous skill and some significant luck), much less a 5.54 or a 5.51 (which can’t). Do you know how many Dragster attempts you can squeeze into two or three hours? A lot.

Fittingly, Omnigamer himself was the first person to get the 5.57, on an emulator. Darbian wanted to be the first to get it on console. Last night, finally, he did it.

That makes me feel alive. You want to know what the human element is in games? It’s in the look on darbian’s face as he played the game thousands of times, striving for the 5.57. It’s in the exultation you can see and hear when he finally gets it. It’s why I and so many other people watch Twitch. Because a game without a player is nothing, but a game with a player? Now that can really be something.

***

[This section has spoilers for the end of Destiny 2′s campaign.]

The human element is also often why I play games myself. Lately I’ve been looking for it in Destiny 2. Something, anything that seems real.

I know that Destiny 2 is a game you’re meant to play with others. You and your friends are supposed to bring your own humanity to the game, and I went about it all wrong by spending most of my time with the game alone. Fine. Take this as you will, then; if you’d like, take it as the thoughts of one player who played Destiny 2 wrong.

The truth is that I don’t like what Destiny 2 does to me. How it uses expertly crafted reward loops and presents all these manageable goals to keep me wanting to come back for more. This is cold, calculating stuff that’s designed to create an addictive experience, and in my book, that’s not a good thing. I don’t like how my mind drifts to the fact that if i just complete three public events on Nessus I’ll get some gear and maybe see my Star Wars action figure’s power level inch up a number or two. How I close my eyes and see Destiny 2 enemies dying in a shower of glimmer and ammo and engrams and think that if I just go play for another 15 minutes, I can reap the rewards myself.

In games like The Witcher 3, if I get a new sword or better armor, I’m grateful for it because of what it might enable me to do. The thing pulling me back is my love of the world and its people; my desire to spend more time with Yennefer, or to smell the salty air of Skellige. Destiny 2 and similar games flip this around. I don’t get better stuff so I can do the harder things. I do the harder things so I can get better stuff. And unlike games such as The Witcher 3 or Breath of the Wild, I never feel firmly rooted in Destiny’s places. I feel insulated, somehow. I know I’m not actually wearing Master Chief’s Mjolnir armor, but it sure feels like I am.

But oh man, what stuff Destiny has. It’s hard not to fetishize some of it, it’s all so strange and beautiful. I examined a friend yesterday who was wearing a helmet called the Crown of Tempests and the damn thing nearly took my breath away. I find myself coveting these things, these bizarre, nonexistent things, and I don’t like it.

I also object to the game’s hollow attempts at philosophizing. As I was making the introspective journey of the soul to get my kickass voidwalker subclass, a phantom of light spouted bullshit masquerading as wisdom. “You will fear nothing and nothing will not fear you,” he said. What a horrible way to think about life. 

I know my character is “human,” or was, but now I’m something else, as lifeless as I am deathless. Sure, so many heroes in games say nothing. So many of them are blank slates onto which we are meant to project ourselves. But why is it that I feel like Link and Samus are defined by their actions, while my guardian is defined by whatever she’s wearing and whatever gun she’s holding in her hand?

Yet there was a fleeting moment toward the end when I felt that Destiny 2 came closer than it ever has to achieving the potential of this kind of multiplayer online shooter. At the start of the campaign’s climactic mission, I was surrounded by other players as we all pushed our way into the city. This was far more exciting than any public event I’d ever participated in. This had momentum. We were moving, making our way forward through enemy resistance. I felt like part of something much larger than myself.

Then, in the end, the Traveler actually does something. It responds. It fights back. The Traveler, which should be this transcendent, undefinable thing, this mysterious being of technology and spirituality, in the first game was nothing more than a matte painting, a convenient explanation for why you get to do space-magic and why you never die. Here, in the end, it acts. 

After that battle, you return to the tower for the first time since the game’s beginning. But it’s different now. Plot events have taken place that have had an impact on the world. Change has actually happened, which, in Destiny, was surprising and remarkable to me. It ain’t much, but the new tower is so much better than the last. Yes, more human, for one thing. I love that it has a noodle shop where you can see people just sitting outside, enjoying their meals. There’s a warmth to the space, like a pleasant summer night. The Traveler looms much closer above, damaged from its part in the struggle. And below, the city is so much nearer, the illumination of its buildings stretching out beneath you.

Both above and below, you are closer to the light.

[lunakinesis]

Best vampire movies? In asking for a friend...

Oh. Well, this is just my opinion and recommendations (and I know Cora made a list too) so…

Interview With the Vampire (1994) - Honestly a classic. Who doesn’t love Louis and brat prince Lestat and their love-hate relationship and attempts to keep their family with Claudia together over the passage of time? 100% recommend the books too to anyone who hasn’t read Anne Rice’s work. 

Dracula Untold (2014) - A take on Vlad Teppes becoming Dracula. Looks amazing, has incredible acting and I assure you, you’ll cry. Give me a sequel already. 

Fright Night (2011) -  Oooh controversial opinion time! Yes, I picked this over the original. It’s definitely less scary than the original but the comedic elements/general aesthetic of the movie more than make up for it. Also Collin Farrell as a vampire. 

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) -  Bank robbers and the family they’ve kidnapped end up in a club full of vampires and have to try to survive until day comes. Wasn’t a box office hit but has a cult following. There’s also now a tv series inspired by it that develops the characters and background witch I recommend too! 

Blade Trilogy (1998-2004) - Based on the Marvel comics. It follows the titular Blade - a ‘daywalker’ - on his endless battle against vampires. The third film does have a lot of controversy surrounding it and it’s not as good as the other two but give it a watch if you like. 

Only Lovers Left Alive (2014) - Probably the most human vampire film in existence. It’s emotionally powerful and deals with depression after centuries of existence. It’s a slow-burning movie and a beautiful tale. 

Dracula (1931) - Honestly the movie we have to thank for vampires becoming such a pop culture staple. Bela Lugosi’s Dracula still continues to define the character and is responsible or the persistent ‘vampire accent’.

Let the Right One In (2008) - Follows a young boy and a vampiric little girl. Another one that’ll make you emotional. Watch the Swedish version over the American remake. Check the book out too!

What We Do in the Shadows (2014) - Mockumentary following vampire flatmates and various other supernatural beings. It’s basically about mundane life but… with vampires and it’s comedy gold. 

Byzantium (2012) - Follows a mother/daughter vampire duo. No high class vampires here, our girls are portrayed by as the lowest rung by society’s standards. The movie is gorgeous and again, a more emotional take on vampires and the problems vampirism can bring. 

The Addiction (1995) - This movie uses vampires to make social commentary. It deals with some heavy issues: AIDS for one, drug abuse for another. But it also explores new age religion and a generation rebelling from what they’ve known. It’s a pretty philosophical movie dealing with peoples’ fluctuating and shifting mindsets. 

Dracula’s Daughter (1936) - Follows - you guessed it - Dracula’s daughter (The Dracula from the 1931 movie). This movie is astounding for its time because it’s a big ol’ lesbian fest and Marya’s quest to rid herself of her vampirism is symbolic of ‘curing’ gay/lesbian individuals.

 Kiss of the Damned (2013) - A screenwriter falls in love with a woman who turns out to be a vampire and is turned by her. They survive by feeding on animals, and everything is going well until our leading lady’s vampiric sister shows up to cause chaos. 

Hotel Transylvania (2012) - An animated movie in which Dracula owns a hotel where the monsters of the world stay, and is about to celebrate his daughter’s - Mavis  - birthday. Things go awry when human Jonathan shows up. Honestly, people dismiss animated movies far too much. This one is high-energy, funny and definitely enjoyable for adults as well as children. 

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992)  - Another take on the iconic novel. The movie is, honestly, hit-or-miss and at times over the top, but Gary Oldman as Dracula, Winona Ryder as Mina and Anthony Hopkins as Van Helsing are delights you can’t pass up on. Even if it’s kind of a wild ride with how OTT it is, it’s a fun one. 

Thirst (2009) - A South Korean movie that follows a young priest. He tries to help with aid work during an epidemic but ends up infected himself. A blood transfusion saves his life but that blood was vampiric and thus he himself is now a vampire. You can imagine the deep moral and spiritual struggle this causes the devout man as he tries to keep a hold of his humanity.

[alvizbeldamarcos]

Why Care About Not Caring: Political Apathy as a Problem

by Tricia Belda

(Source: Total Croatia News)

Filipinos should be working together to combat political apathy. This indifference may remain unnoticed but the truth is, it is quite prevalent in the country. The citizens want nothing to do with politics, with faulty government officials, with crime rates, with voting, etc. Filipinos these days do not want to bother themselves with the problems of the nation. Such lack of interest poses impending problems such as the masses losing their power to authoritarian leaders, or the country being sold off to foreigners. In fact, these problems are gradually being more evident these days--- all the more reason to tackle and try to put an end to apathy.

Apathy is defined by Merriam-Webster (n.d.) as a “lack of interest or concern”. In a more philosophical sense, “political apathy” refers to the indifference of people towards political issues of concern. Political apathy is currently present among the majority of the Filipinos. These traits are manifested in different ways among the masses. It is evident when people refuse to vote out of laziness or hopelessness, when people deem political topics as irrelevant, when people view rallies or protests as an inconvenience, and other traits which show little to no regard for the country. These characteristics are commonly overlooked, as they seem like simply a matter of preferences. However, having citizens not caring about several deaths, remaining silent about several problems, and merely nodding in approval of whatever the authorities decide on--- these are all tragic signs of the prevalent apathy in the country.  

In these cases, the people are not always to blame. A lot of factors are to be considered as to why this apathy exists. Bennett (1960-1984) states that there is a huge correlation between political interest and media attention; possibly implying that people may either pay more attention to the news because they are interested in politics, or that they gained their interest through being exposed to the media every day. Ahmed et. al. (2012) also listed the following as reasons why university students in Government College University, Lahore: bribery, corruption, nepotism, corrupt bureaucracy, feudalism, attack on judiciary, and ignoring public demands. On a local perspective, primary causes would be the lack of education among masses, desensitization brought about by the media, being part of the privileged/unaffected, and/or the sense of powerlessness or the feeling of being an extremely minor factor in a huge system.

McClurg (2003) generalizes this by simply saying the class (or the status) of a person may directly determine his/her likelihood to be involved. He states that people of a higher status (from the middle class to highest) tend to be more politically involved compared to those in the lower status (the struggling or poor), indicating that people who have more access to information are more likely to be politically active. Ironically, Mosby (1898) says that people with higher income tend to be more apathetic due to their respective businesses keeping them busy, and their money blinding them from the truths. This explains how a majority of people of higher socioeconomic status remain silent on public affairs. However, people in the middle class, the ones who earn sufficiently and has undergone formal education, are the ones most likely to be active.

Ahmad (2015) reviews this in his research among university students and concludes that, “respondents with a high level of education have a low level of apathy”. People of the middle class are more likely to be educated and to be informed of the current state of their country, while at the same time able to experience and to see the struggles of the country--- motivating them to voice out or participate, especially in times of dire need. However, with one-fifth of the country’s population under the poverty line, as Rappler (2018) indicates, the ones in most need of help and the ones with the lack of education outnumber the ones who could potentially change the state of apathy in the country. With the current state of the country, one cannot help remaining unheard, or losing hope in the face of the politics in the Philippines. Even now, with the current president making unethical decisions.

The current president of the Philippines is a “strongman”, who knows how to use his word to appeal to the masses. With most Filipinos lacking political education and being easily swayed by words, they are quick to support Duterte—regardless of his brutal ways. In his campaign speeches, Duterte repeatedly emphasized his promise of ending criminality, corruption, and drug-use. ABS-CBN News (2016) quotes his specific words last March 16, 2016 in his campaign rally in Lingayen, “When I become the president, I’ll order the police and the military to find these people and kill them.” However, in his attempt to “cleanse” the Philippines, innocent lives have been taken away. Despite this fact, the president was still able to garner support from the citizens. Flores (2018) cites that the SWS poll conducted in the late June (among 1 200 adults) resulted in a 78 percent satisfaction rate. Such a high rating shows how Filipinos support the killings of their fellow Filipinos---including the innocent ones.  Although the high rate may be surprising, the fact that a large number also decided to remain silent on the topic is an even bigger problem.

While a huge part of the population remains, misinformed, another part remains uninterested. Some citizens have a different perspective on politics; they tend to think that it’s not their problem. After all, to them, politics only involves the government. Filipinos tend to think individually, focusing only in their personal lives as they let the authority run the country. Choosing to remain silent or retaining the careless attitude would prove itself problematic, for politics always involves the nation as a whole. The terrifying fact about apathy is that it stems from the “this won’t affect me” thinking; not considering that anything that occurs does affect everyone, just not directly. Politics is not only a matter of the people in power, but also everyone in the country who is under that power. Social involvement plays a vital role in the functioning of a country. McClurg (2003) even states that, “social involvement exposes people to community norms and promotes interpersonal trust, factors which in turn make political involvement more likely”. A country that has citizens actively participating in political discussions, actively voting, and actively speaking out against the problems of the government is bound to be a country leaning towards progress.

Political philosopher Hannah Arendt expounds on the apathy exhibited by individuals towards their societies. Arendt (1958) stated that:

A life without speech and without action, on the other hand -- and this is the only way of life that in earnest has renounced all appearance and all vanity in the biblical sense of the word -- is literally dead to the world; it has ceased to be a human life because it is no longer lived among men.

By “action”, she refers to the activities between people such as interactions or communications. In her words, Arendt aims to emphasize on the importance of societal involvement in politics. She believes that involvement, or “action” is what keeps the society alive. Having politically active individuals contributes to the society’s sustainment; to the sustainment of the “public sphere” (in Arendt’s words). She also believes that keeping the public sphere alive and existing is what gives citizens their freedom. Once the public sphere dissolves, once people stop interacting and stop sustaining it, freedom could then be easily taken away. Such is the case with the current state of the Philippines; once people stop caring for others, once they stop working together to achieve a common goal (of a better country), the people in power could easily take over them and take their freedom away.

One thing that people should keep in mind from Arendt is that the consequences of an individual’s action does not only affect him/her but rather, the society as a whole since this comprises the public sphere. In a person’s decision to support to EJK, one also affects everyone else in his/her community. Likewise, in one’s choice to remain silent, he/she also affects everyone in the public sphere. Stephan & Finlay (1999) states that it is vital to empathize with people, regardless of their different standings or statuses in the society. It is the duty of the privileged to think critically and voice out for the minority. For individuals with the ability to do so, one should carefully consider their choice of supporting a certain decision for whatever one decides upon, also speaks for the unfortunate ones.

Political apathy has already been deeply rooted in the system. Citizens should gradually try to take steps towards a more politically-active society, and a more progressive government. As Mosby (1898) puts it, “when a bad government exists the people have none but themselves to blame, for in them alone is the remedy”. The citizens ought to step up for a change, especially since they are the ones in power. The government may dictate the rules and how to run the country, but the people dictates who gets to be in the government. Perhaps, begin with the proper education. Educate the people of what is truly happening, educate the youth of the importance of politics, tell people of the importance of voting (and voting wisely, more importantly), teach them how to discern fake news from real ones, encourage them to criticize whatever they read and have opinions of their own.

Keep one’s self in the know. Through doing this, people could hopefully gain consciousness of the current issues of the country and would hopefully try to get involved. Make some noise. Let the people protest, let them voice out and fight for what they think is right. One does not necessarily have to participate, but at least have them support and listen to these, instead of simply bad-mouthing them. Make information more accessible to everyone. Let the people easily hear or read of the current state of the country. Let them hear news of the politicians so that they may know who to support.

One may feel powerless in the face of a huge system taking control but, one does not even have to be powerful or extraordinary to make a change; simple acts can create a ripple effect. Loeb (2004) cites Rosa Parks as an example; she stood up to racism starting from a simple act of refusing to give her seat in the bus. Back then, buses in America segregated people in the bus by making blacks sit at the back while whites sit at the front. Prior to that, Loeb also tells of how Parks “had spent twelve years helping lead the NAACP chapter” and that “she'd attended training session at Tennessee's labor and civil rights organizing school, the Highlander Center, where she'd met an older generation of civil rights activists and discussed the recent Supreme Court decision banning ‘separate but equal’ schools”. It was not simple for her but she started off with small steps and finally, her hard work bore fruit; all of these she did without being a person of huge importance. In the same sense, apathy could be stopped once we harbour a passion to get involved, a passion for a better society, and a passion for others.

The difficult fact about the existence of apathy is that it may beget more apathy. A lot of people do not seem to care, so a lot more maybe convinced to do the same. A lot of people are already hopeless, so hopelessness may triumph over the majority. However, one shall not lose hope. Hope is probably one of the most powerful things one might possess in the present times; alongside the capacity to criticize and the courage to speak out. Now that the Philippines is in a critical state, it’s more encouraged that people take part--- participate, get involved in the happenings. Being a simple citizen may make one seem powerless but alongside other people with the same mind set, the masses could effectively fight for what is right and get what they deserve.

Bibliography

ABS-CBN News. (2016, June 29). President Rodrigo Duterte’s campaign promises.

Ahmed, S. (2014). Reasons for Political Interest and Apathy among University Students: A Qualitative Study. Politcal Interest and Apathy.

Ahmed, S. (2015). Role of Socioeconomic Status and Political Participation in. Journal of Human Behavior in the Social Environment, 6-7.

Arendt, H. (n.d.). Action. In The Human Condition (p. 176). Chicago: The University of Chicago Press.

Causes and Consequences of Citizen Political Indifferences . (1960-1984). In S. Bennett, Apathy in America (pp. 270-272). New York: Transnational Publishers.

Flores, H. (2018, September 24). 78% of Pinoys satisfied with drug war – SWS. Philstar Global.

Loeb, P. (2004). The Real Rosa Parks. In P. Loeb, The Impossible Will Take a Little While : A Citizen's Guide to Hope in a Time of Fear (pp. 288-292). New York: Basic Books.

McClurg, S. (2003). Socia Networks and Political Participation: The Role of Social Interaction in Explaining Political. Political Research Quarterly, 11-13.

Mosby, S. (1898). Dangers of Political Apathy. The North American Review, 1-3. Retrieved from The North American Review.

Rappler. (2018, May 30). PH economy growing but poverty still high – World Bank. Retrieved from Rappler: https://www.rappler.com/business/203680-economy-poverty-rate-philippines-world-bank-report-2018

Stephan, W. &. (1999). The Role of Empathy in Improving Intergroup Relations.