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#it’s worth little and an open invitation to attack us for not being the best version of what we did for every single individual at the same
ziracona · 2 years
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Incredible just how much more people liked me for including, and valued my inclusion of, the disabilities/queer/neurodivergent stuff I wrote before they knew I was those things myself.
#writing#I think about this a lot. because of course it happened. it happens to /everyone/ who is and does write that. but it’s so stupid and so#fucking unfair??? oh so it was awesome I was writing cool mentally ill characters and giving rep until people found out I /was/ also#mentally ill and writing rep for my own people? why is it more valuable if a strait bitch is writing someone queer than if one of our own i#(it’s not. but god do people think it is and act like it is)#when people think you’re a straight white cis abled mentally well neurotypical everything you include is a#groundbreaking boon and wonderful and its great to be seen and here are your trophies for doing SO well at being inclusive!!#but the second people realize you’re not instead you’re work becomes Eh what did you expect? at best and more often it’s an open invitation#to be scrutinized for every imaginable flaw in rep like you’re in court for gross misconduct#what the fuck is with that? it’s great when strangers care enough to pretend to know you?#but when your own feel such self love for their communities they want to sing it’s beauty to the world#it’s worth little and an open invitation to attack us for not being the best version of what we did for every single individual at the same#time? have you internalized such self hatred that you turn it outward at anyone like you to feel safe and can only feel valued if people wh#willl never really know what it’s like to be you at all are the ones saying you’re worth writing about?
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Hello! Me again, back to pester you about lore.
So what's going on with The Drifter? For once I know a little about the character, I read 'A Man With No Name', but I still have questions. From how the book read, Drifter convinced Felwinter to get revenge for the destruction of the village. Did that go anywhere? And what did Drifter get up to for the (unspecified very long) timeskip between the book and the game?
And with the modern day, does the Vanguard know he's running a fighting ring out of the basement? Or does every single guardian look away when Zavala tries figuring out where people keep getting these weapons? I guess first rule of fight club and all that. What's he even trying to do? He seems to be pretty against most of the Vanguard's leadership.
Anyway, another invitation to infodump about your other blorbo. I hope you don't mind XD
If you thought I was long-winded about Eris... She's maybe 400 years old whereas the Drifter may be 900... get comfy... this will not be quick.
"Dark Age was wild times."
I adore the Drifter and a good chunk of how and why I adore him is his voice - both the voice acting and the syntax/diction/phrasing used in the writing, but voice alone does not cover why I find his character so utterly enthralling and fantastic.
I wrote a short piece consisting of Eris telling Ikora what she sees in him in my story Finders Keepers. It's basically a personality analysis and some people have (I think probably accurately) accused it of being a love letter to that character. (Reminder: that link is fanfiction - I wrote it - it is not lore, but it is based on lore. However, everything else I list after this is actual lore.)
But, personality aside, ultimately the Drifter's story is what I find most compelling about him and makes him so empathetic. You mentioned you've read A Man with No Name, but there's more. A lot more.
To start, the Drifter is D2's most violent pacifist.
He doesn't want to fight and when he does, it's vicious. The Emissary of the Nine, formerly Orin (his ex-best friend and/or ex-lover, depending upon how you read it) aptly says "He hates violence. He hates it so much he'll murder anyone who tries to inflict it on him."
In A Man with No Name, we see him go from hiding in a town and having it obliterated by warlords, to running a bar at the bottom of Felwinter peak, to getting Lord Felwinter himself to avenge the town. Drifter doesn't fight anywhere in there and gets other people to do his fighting for him, which is a pretty standard tactic for him. And yes, it is strongly implied that Felwinter does indeed murder the fuck out of Lord Dryden when he says "Call Lord Dryden. Prepare my Iron Banner arsenal."
But then we get Dark Age Drifter entries where he's gunning down Fallen attackers with quotes like "He had never brought himself to shoot a human. Or anything even resembling a human. Risen included." (Bonus mention: notice "Alright" repeated here and compare to his standard Gambit opening of Alright, alright, alright...") Where he's slipping away from non-violence, specifying, in particular, that he won't shoot a human but will defend himself from aliens.
And then he becomes something else entirely in these amazing entries with what I've been calling his Breakneck crew:
Now Otto's a Sword man. He's all about "craft." Technique. Precision. It's disgusting, but I don't care how he does it, as long as it gets done, so I just let him do it. And Otto does it so beautifully that, when he's done, you're standing there holding your guts in your hands and thanking him for the show.
Never touches a gun, that girl. She likes to get close. Likes to look right in their eyes and be the last thing they see.
The chumps that run out to stop us are babies. That's the kicker with Warlords—other than ours, there's not a Ghost in sight here. Just civilians who can barely hold their guns without wetting their pants, who can't aim worth a damn, who stick their necks out for the bad guys with eternal life. Real geniuses.
Cenric stood up. That vein of his looked about ready to pop. Drifter let his feet down as he reached for his rifle, asp-quick. "And you know what we do with rats, don't you, brother."
And the thing I love about this is the character development this speaks to where he goes from pacifist who won't fight at all... to someone who will use a machine gun competently, repeating "Alright" and getting himself used to killing, but not humans, never humans... to stone cold vicious murder-Drifter talking about the lightless who die to his crew in ways that make them (and himself) seem no longer human, to gunning down his own crew, people he felt were a perfect team, when they make deals with warlords behind his back and lie to him about it.
The Drifter started out adhering to an ideal of nonviolence and it destroyed him and everyone he cared for. His sense of self, his principles, everything he believed in is eroded until he completely loses all hope and in order to survive the cruelty of the world he lives in he becomes a ruthless monster.
Either before or after his Breakneck-era crew (it's not clear), the Drifter (under the name Eli) joins the Pilgrim Guard, a group of Titans protecting lightless people as they travel to the Last City. He does this out of a desire/need to be near Orin, a Titan with a complicated past and strong ties to both Queen Mara and the Nine. But then after spending time with Eli/Drifter and the Pilgrim Guard, Orin, the one person Drifter's ever had a deep human connection with, the person he considers his best friend, leaves without a word.
It's very telling that the green snakes, the jade coin, and the red string on those same coins that form such profound parts of the Drifter's symbolism and identity all come from Orin. When the Drifter truly cares for someone, he incorporates part of them into himself, into his identity, making them part of who he becomes, so they live on inside of him.
After his time with Orin, we get into the extremely confusing, contradictory mess that is the Drifter's intersection with Shin Malfur-related Rose/Thorn/Lumina lore. And by this I mean that the Drifter, after fighting alongside people doing genuinely noble good work, in the wake of losing Orin, leaves the Pilgrim Guard and eventually ends up joining the evil cult of evil: following in the footsteps of one of the most reviled risen to ever exist - the guardian-killer: Dredgen Yor.
If you're gonna hang with me, you need to know about the Shadows of Yor. They follow the edicts of a very bad man named Dredgen Yor. And what're his Shadows after? Everything the Light can't provide. I thought they could help me find an answer to the battles of Light versus Light that raged during the Dark Age. But the longer I flew with them, the more I saw they're blind as all those who follow the Traveler. One albatross for another. I was done with 'em.
And while in the cult, in some sort of ritual, he communes with the Darkness directly and gets some sort of Darkness powers (possibly Stasis, possibly something else - it's super unclear) and the Darkness whispers to him his Dredgen name: Dredgen Hope, which is particularly brutal in context with this quote from Dredgen Yor himself:
I care only to give hope to the frightened, huddled masses so that when I come upon them they will have more to lose. Their pain will be greater. Their screams more pure… Nothing dies like hope. I cherish it.
But it is also particularly pointed because hope is the thing the Drifter doesn't have. Trust is the thing he doesn't have the ability to do any more because of his experiences (and is also the name of the hand cannon he wears shoved into his pants). He is the most jaded (literally - constantly fidgeting with a jade coin) character in the D2 universe. He loses everything and leans in on it and follows that path to full evil.
And then he walks away. Because evil doesn't work for him either.
But also (either before or after he's completely left the cult - it's ambiguous, but possibly when he's still entangled but it's already fracturing and falling apart) he finds Orin again (he's using the name Wu Ming at this point - either having returned to it, or because he hasn't changed it yet from Felwinter Peak, or perhaps this happens before Felwinter Peak - the order and timeline is somewhat fuzzy).
Orin does not remember who he is when he finds her the second time (she's pretty nuts at this point - her story is filled with madness and tragedy), and is going insane with grief over losing Namqi (the person she left with when she disappeared the first time) as well as her obsession with the Nine. And the Drifter is once more drawn to her and once more connects deeply with her:
Wu Ming leaves his questions by the wayside as he is drawn inexorably into the gravity well of her desperate honesty. Her confessions lower his defenses. He talks of himself. Of his fear. Of his loneliness. How he feels he is one fingernail away from plummeting into an abyss. How he feels vicious resentment every time he is brought back from the dead: He never asked for the gift of the Light... They make excuse after excuse to meet again. Every conversation is colored by excavated truths; every day they feel they will reach some bedrock that will break them to pieces. It is as frightening as it is intoxicating.
But then Orin finds out about him being a Dredgen, terminates their relationship, goes off to become the Emissary of the Nine and, as someone I was talking with once referred to it: 'it was a breakup so bad he had to leave the solar system.'
Things go very poorly the first time the Drifter loses Orin but the second time is far worse. He has a full-on Lovecraftian 'At the Mountains of Madness' style horror-movie-plot experience with a crew he calls his 'best friends' (which may or may not be all ex-Dredgens but there's at least evidence they might be) out on a frozen planet being stalked and driven to insane levels of paranoia by Darkness creatures able to snuff out their light:
I think I mentioned we're all raving psychos at this point. Well, we did what all measured raving psychos would do. We thought we each had been betrayed by the others. We drew on each other.
The Drifter kills them all to keep them from killing him (at least, that's what he says - no one else is alive to argue). Then his ghost, who up until now has been kind of a moralistic asshole, suggests he hunt down the ghosts of his former crew and Frankenstein them together in order to survive:
And the craziest thing happened. My Ghost snapped... But we would need parts. Ghost parts. And we knew where we could get some... The Ghosts of my former crew all fled as soon as their charges hit the dirt. So me'n mine, we hunted them... "Hey. There's always hope. For what it's worth, I'm proud of you." It was the last thing my Ghost ever said, and the last lie it ever told.
The Drifter's ghost is rendered mute from the experience (either mechanically or due to the trauma of hunting down and murdering other ghosts - it's not clear) but the plan works, they survive, and the Drifter builds the Derelict out of scrap, returning to the Tower where he sets up Gambit.
It's super unclear (again, the Shin-related lore is just a mess and deliberately confusing) but it turns out that Drifter going on about how the Man with the Golden Gun is out to get him is actually a deal he made with Shin to set up Gambit (because, spoiler: the leader of the entire Dredgen cult, Dredgen Vale, turns out to be none other than Shin Malphur, the Man with the Golden Gun, who hunts Dredgens and who the Drifter has been saying is out to get him this entire time) to draw out the truly Darkness-corrupted guardians so Shin can kill them. (And this is ultimately why the Vanguard lets him run a fighting ring in the basement - because Shin convinces them it will help find the truly bad guardians so they can be eliminated).
If you find that confusing, that's because it is. Anything to do with Shin Malphur/Dredgen Yor/Rose/Thorn/Lumnia is pretty much an acid-trip, continuity-wise. It hurts my brain.
As for where the Drifter gets the weapons he gives us for Gambit? To the surprise of no one, he's stealing them. Because of course he is. It's him.
While running Gambit, he ends up visited by the Emissary of the Nine (formerly Orin - same body, different person) and has the Haul attached to the Derelict as a 'gift' in this amazing cutscene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFtmr___dSw
And he pretty much stays in "shifty morally ambiguous guy in the basement" mode until Arrivals when the pyramids show up on Io and we get one of my favourite lore tabs in all of D2: Whispering slab.
The two sit. They speak. They listen. Linkages forged in Light and Dark of traded secrets as the Derelict hangs in orbit around the Earth. Pacts are made. Soon, there is only the silence of knowing left between them.
"Next time you fly over the Moon, dust your boots. Tracking that crap all over my floors."
Both of the Drifter's deep emotional entanglements with Orin happen when he really genuinely talks to her, and now in Whispering Slab, he's genuinely talking to someone else, plus we get the origin of why he calls that someone else Moondust.
Then, during Arrivals, we get the amazing banter between him and Eris, and in Beyond Light they learn to control Stasis together with the result being (in my highly subjective opinion) the best cutscene in all of D2 : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQAB-sSi6P0
At the end of Haunted we get Eris' message to him about healing and finding joy , he has this line in Plunder "What we do now matters more than who we were", we end up with the Kept Confidence lore tab during Season of the Witch where the person who previously insisted he trusted no one now is saying: "He didn't trust them. He trusted her" and then in the Gloaming Journeyer tab, he pulls her into a hug and reminds her of what she told him once (in the Prophesy dungeon dialogue): "That we'll live in the night if we have to. We do it for what comes after." (What comes after is dawn, hope, the continuance of existence after the darkest point.)
Someone in a chat I was in once summed up the core dynamic of the Drifter and Eris' relationship perfectly as "He gives her trust. She gives him hope."
There are people online who are very frustrated with the Drifter's character development, feeling that the Drifter has 'had his teeth filed off' and that he 'got his depression cured by getting a goth girlfriend' but I feel that's just people who don't like change. The Drifter has, throughout his entire storyline been constantly changing who he is. Change is part of his many self-constructed identities which he re-creates over and over as his old sense of self is destroyed and remade. Gritty vicious Drifter is still in there and he will be just as brutal as ever if he needs to be.
He doesn't want to be, though. He never has. And as someone who deals with medical-grade depression and who found themselves in a situation where they needed to reconstruct a sense of self to replace the one that was lost, the Drifter finding a way to hope and trust again after all he's been through is an extremely powerful and poignant narrative which speaks to me on many levels.
It's not trite, thoughtless happy fluffy rainbows, friendship-fixes-everything-whee! It's painful and slow and beautiful as the Drifter learns to have healthy relationships with other people. We need stories like this to speak to us at an unconscious level and tell us that even if you're not Eris Morn and you failed, and you gave up, and you didn't make it out of the Hellmouth, and you in fact gave in to despair and completely lost all hope, your experience erasing who it was you were and having that old you replaced with someone else, you can still find hope again. Even if you've been burned so severely by so many, many, negative human interactions that you cannot trust anyone, if you find the right people, you can slowly learn how to trust again.
The Drifter's story has been called a redemption arc, and I guess in a way it is that too but, for me, the essential quality of the Drifter's narrative isn't redemption: it's healing.
Stories have power. We incorporate them into who we are. Dredgen Hope ultimately does live up to his name. Within D2 he is finally starting to heal. I find that idea, of healing in spite of being so altered by one's experiences as to have had to become an entirely different person in order to survive, of being unable to trust and still finding a way to learn how to trust again, to be important and beautiful to have in my subconscious as something to draw from. It is a story that is very much needed by a lot of people. We need to be reminded that we can be irrevocably changed and have everything taken from us and still find a way to trust and hope and love again. That might seem a bit much for a shooty game, but I maintain this is why D2 has some of the best storytelling of any game I've ever played and that the character of the Drifter is a huge part of what makes that storytelling so compelling.
Sorry this took so long to answer. This seriously was as short as I could make it and still say everything that I felt needed to be said. There's more, and more detail, of course, but this is my treatise on why the Drifter is as awesome as I think he is.
That is all.
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dirtybitfic · 3 days
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Reality pt.3
(I didn't proofread cause it already took me long enough to finish this so if there are typos I'm so sorry)
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I wake up feeling extra warm and comfortable , I blink open my eyes and look down to see arms around my waist . I cant help the smile that spread across my face when I remember who's is beside me in bed . I try my best to stay still so I don't wake him up . sadly the second I made even a peep Misha ran over and jumped onto the bed attacking me with kisses and waking him up in the process. I couldn't help the giggles that escaped when I saw matts face when Misha played on him licking his face non stop. "Misha Misha calm down baby " I say as I try and get her off of him . " Sorry I tried my best not to wake you up but evidently someone had other plans " I say laughing as I pet Misha.
" It's okay I down mind being woken up by dog kisses" he says smiling and giving Misha head scratches. I could barely control myself when I heard his morning voice. His voice is hot as fuck already but this ... ooh this is so much better. "I was gonna go down and make some breakfast , does anything sound good to you?" I ask him while getting up and going to my closet to grab a sweatshirt. "mmm I don't know bacon sounds pretty good " he says while stretching " Alright bacon I can do that ... you like pancakes ?" I say and he nods " Any specific type , I usually makes blueberry and chocolate chip" I say and he smiles " I love chocolate chip pancakes " he says and I nod " Sounds good ill be down in the kitchen so take your time getting up " I say and he nods.
I just finished up cooking breakfast . I made pancakes, eggs, bacon , sausage and cut up some fresh fruit . He walks down stairs smiling " Smells great in here" he says and I smile . We both plate up what we want and sit down. We eat mostly in silence just enjoying having each others company . We decided it would be nice to take a little hike close by and see one the waterfalls .
I just got dressed and fed Misha , I would take her but this hike is a bit dangerous for dog especially with the waterfall and slightly wet surfaces. We hopped in my car and made the quick 20 minute drive . We talked about random stuff like childhood memories and funny moments.
The hike isn't too hard but its definitely not easy , we both had to stop and take breaks from time to time but I just kept telling him once we got to the waterfall it would all be worth it . " So do you hike out here a lot?" he asked and I shook my head " Not that much anymore , when I was younger I did . My parents loved to hike and in high school it was a fun place to go with friends but now not so much" I say and he nods " I get that , I used to love taking long walks and hikes with my family or just by myself to clear my head but I guess i've just gotten busy and don't have the time anymore" he says and I nod " Growing up sucks huh" I say and he laughs " Yeah id give anything to be a carefree kid again" he says and I laugh " Same "
The second we reach the waterfall we sit and catch our breathe taking in the view. " It really is beautiful" Matt says and I look over watching his face contort with emotions as he takes in the surroundings. " Yeah it really is" I say looking away from him smiling.
By the time we got back to my car my feet were cramping and my entire body was sore. " The view was beautiful but fuck I'm exhausted" Matt says laughing and I join in " Yeah , I think I need an ice bath with how sore I am" I joke and he laughs . We get back to my house and I go up to my room grabbing a change of clothes to wear after my shower . Matt comes in flopping down on the floor laying there while Misha laid next to him wagging her tail. " Im gonna hop in the shower " I say to Matt and he nods . I wrestle with myself in my mind on if I should invite him in with me or not . I finally just blurt it out " Do you want to maybe - u-um join me" I say more as a rushed question . He looks at me smiling widely " Yeah you want me to?" he asks in a deep teasing tone , I try my best to not sound stupid " Yeah I- I mean only if you want to you don't have to" I answer quietly avoiding eye contact feeling super fucking nervous. " Id love to" he says standing up and walking over to me . " wait really?" I ask and he chuckles " Yes" is all he says before he grabs my arm and pulls me with him into the bathroom.
He looks deeply into my eyes as he slowly starts taking his shirt off , I decide to do the same . You couldn't cut this tension with a knife. Im so nervous but also buzzing with excitement. Once we're both topless we start on getting our pants off , I take off my bra after and once were both in our underwear we both take a moment to soak in each others bodies. The way he looking at me is making me so nervous, he looks like he wants to eat me alive.
We both finally take off our underwear and step into the shower turning on the hot water and letting it cascade down us. I have a large shower with multiple heads so we're both getting soaked by water. I take my body wash off the shelf but he stops me before I can lather myself. " Let me " he says and I smile letting him lather me in my Carmel apple scented body wash . He slowly steps me back so the water can rinse off the suds. He hands me his body wash and I practically squeal in excitement . The amount of times I fantasized about shit like this is crazy and now... its reality . I take my sweat time lathering his body feeling every muscle and digit of his body. He rinses it off then grabs my shampoo again doing it for me . I tell him to only do the roots and about half way down and he listens but he comments that its stupid not to shampoo all of the hair , I explained to him why I don't shampoo the ends ... to be honest I don't think he understood but I think he just acted like he did to make me happy. He conditioned the ends like I told him and I rinsed it out.
I took my time shampooing him , it was difficult because he's taller than me so I had to be on my tippy toes. He noticed I was struggling so he scooped me up and held me up as I wrapped my legs around him. " Better?" he asks and I smile and hum "Mhm" I say and I continue lathering in the shampoo. What u least expected him to do was take one of my nipples in his mouth. " Matt" I gasp as my hands falter . He grips my thighs tighter as my head slightly leans back and I let out a whimper. He pulls off with a slight sting of his teeth dragging on my nipple . " Sorry I couldn't resist they were in my face" he says with a smile . He steps back into the water and I help rinse the shampoo out .
I cant help the smile that spreads on my face when I feel the tip of his dick graze my pussy. I haven't seen it yet but I have a feeling its not small . After the shampoo is all out he doesn't put me down he keeps me held up . " You look so hot with wet hair" he says and I laugh "what why?" I ask and he shakes his head " I don't know it just looks good" he says and I smile . " You gonna put me down or?" I question and he shakes his head again " Nope I like you right here" he says before taking my other nipple in his mouth making me gasp. He flicks his tongue and sucks on it making pleasure course through my body.
" fuck matt" I whine and he comes off with a pop " Feel good?" he asks with a smirk I nod my head quickly letting out a whine . He sets me down and turns off the water. I step out grabbing my towel then handing him his. The second he wraps his around his waist he picks me up and throws me over his shoulder making me laugh. " what are you doing?" I ask mid laugh " Taking you to bed" he says in a deep voice making my laughs stop . I wanted this , him, for so long and I still haven't registered that it truly is happening ... and not just in my head.
He lays me down on the bed hovering over me , I wrap my arms around his neck bringing him in for a deep kiss. His lips are soft and his tongue warm and he explores my mouth with it making me moan into the kiss. He postings his body right in-between my thighs . The kiss turns from slow and warm to hot and needy . I cant help the moans that escape my mouth as my hands roam his body. One of his hands slowly trails down to my thigh making me whimper into the kiss. He pulls away and starts kissing and sucking on my neck. Im whining and whimpering under him as his hands slowly slides its way closer and closer to my dripping wet pussy. He slowly starts kissing down as he uses his other hand to undo my towel thats around me . He kisses all the way down until he reaches my pussy . I watch him intently and his eyes meet mine and his tongue flicks out meeting my clit making me gasp . He smiles before he goes in licking and sucking so skillfully , i'm panting and moaning and my head drops back and my back arches. " M-matt feels so good" I moan and he groans into me making me twitch. He starts sucking harder on my clit making me moan out loudly as my hands move to his wet hair.
He slowly enters a finger into me making the pleasure even more heightened . " Ahh f-fuck matt oh god" I moan as my legs start to tremble and I feel myself getting closer to release . " Taste so sweet , I always knew you would" he says as he adds another finger in making me gasp and my face to contort in pleasure . " You gonna be a good girl and cum for me?" he asks with a smirk on his face and I moan " Yes yes fuck im s-so close" I moan and he goes back to licking and sucking my clit . My legs are shaking and slowly tightening around his head and my fingers are tugging tighter on his hair . " Matt oh f-fu please don't stop " I whine and his fingers move faster making my entire body tremble and my toes curl and I fall over the edge screaming his name as I come undone all over his face and fingers.
" Thats it good girl" he groans as he watches me come undone for him. I slowly come down and his fingers finally stop moving as he slowly slides them out. I watch him as i'm breathing heavily , he slides his fingers into his mouth sucking my juices of making me moan . " Did so good for me" he praises making me smile and blush. He slowly moves back up my body . " Gonna let me make you feel good?" he asks in a sultry voice , I nod " Yes please matt" I say in a needy tone and he smiles.
" One thing though" he says and I furrow my eyebrows " What is it?" I ask and his eyes getting darker " I like to be in full control and ... I want you to call me sir . is that okay with you?" he says and I smile "Yes sir" I say in a slutty voice making him groan . " You have no idea how long i've wanted to do this " he says and I smile " same" I say and he smiles.
" I'll go easy at first but the second you adjust I won't be easy " he says and I nod " Okay" I say and he nods. He slowly takes off the towel form his waist and I get the first look at his dick. This is going to be painful I think to myself , he's long like very long and thick . " Hey it's okay" he says as i'm guessing he can see the panic on my face . I take a deep breathe and fully lay down . " Ready?" he asks and I nod . I feel his tip slip up and down my folds making me sigh . He slowly starts sliding in making me gasp . He's stretching me so much and its only the tip . " I know I know , deep breathes baby " he soothes me and I try my best to relax . The more he slides in the more pain spreads through my body. " M-matt it hurts" I whimper as my hands grasps his bicep tightly . " I know sweetheart I know i'm going as slow as possible" he says in a sweet tone . After a couple excruciating minutes he's fully in and the pain is lessening .
Ive never felt so full in my life , I always fantasied about him being big but not this fucking big. At first I felt like I was being ripped in half but now i'm feeling so much pleasure in spots i've never felt before. " Fuck you're squeezing me so tight" he groans making me smile . " Think you can handle me going a little harder ?" he asks and I nod " Use me Matt I can handle it " I whimper and he immediately starts pounding the fuck out of me . I cant help the moans and screams I let out , he's so deep I feel like he's in my chest . " FUCK OH- S-SO DEEP" I literally scream out as he hits so deep I squirt out of nowhere and my legs begin twitching and trembling . " Atta girl " he says and he holds me down by my hips somehow going even harder than he was before . Im fully unable to speak at this pint the only thing that leaves my mouth are squeaks , moans, whimpers and screams as he continues to make me squirt all over him so many times I loose count .
Im becoming so over stimulated and i'm shocked with how much stamina he has . Ive never gone for this long , i'm not comparing but my body feels like it about to shut down any second . " Fucking you dumb with my big cock huh" he says smirking proudly as he watches tears fall down my cheeks . " Y- yes -- s... sir" I choke out In a scratchy voice . " fuck " he groans as I feel his dick start to pulse in me . " You're gonna cum with me " he demands as his fingers rub circles on my swollen clit making my entire body tremble and my hip to lift off the bed . " I - c- cant ... to - to much " I gasp as his fingers add more pressure " You're going to do as I say " he says in a demanding tone that makes me shiver . I whine in protest as my body try to get away from him . He grips my hip so tight its going to leave bruises " come on I can feel you pulsing " he says and I whimper . " MATT" I scream as I come undone , I fully stop breathing and my body convulses and curled into his . He releases into me with a low groan as he holds me close to him .
I finally catch my breath and fully collapse onto the bed , I can barely open my eyes and i'm breathing do heavily its all you can hear. " Shh its okay its okay" he says as he slowly pulls out and lays down pulling me onto him soothing my back . Crazy how he can go form rough as fuck and dominate too sweet and calm the next second . I relax into him as tears still fall from my eyes and my breathing starts to slowly go back to normal. My entire body is shaking and my pussy is pulsing from the abuse it just took from his huge dick.
After probably and hour i've calmed down and my body has stopped trembling . " Let's get you cleaned up" he says before picking me up and bringing me to the bathroom . He sets me on the toilet so I can pee and starts a bath for me . I finish my business and slowly stand stumbling over to the tub . He helps me in and then gets in behind me letting me lean back into his chest and he soothes my hair. " You doin okay?" he asks quietly " more than okay" I say smiling and he pulls me closer keeping his arms wrapped around me.
We lay in the bath comfortable in silence letting the water relax our muscles . " You ready to get out and go to bed?" he asks and I nod sleepily . He helps me out and drys me off before we both climb into bed fully naked not having the energy nor really wanted to put on clothes. He turns off the lights and pulls me close .
I fall asleep within minuets feeling his warmth wrap around me like a blanket of comfort .
I genuinely cant believe this I say reality right now , I wanted this man for years and I finally have him . I will also say that older guys do it better which I fully expected but tonight really showed me that its true. I cant wait to see where this all goes but for now i'm happy .
Her you guys goooooo! I finally got my shit together and finished this part !
Lova ya 🫶🏼💋
@imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @sturniolonmc @blahbel668 @sturnxp
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edosianorchids901 · 1 year
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The Joy of Discovery
@flashfictionfridayofficial prompt - "how do you use it?"
“My dear, why would I possibly need such a contraption?”
“Because,” Crowley replied, unwilling to dig deeper into it.
“For being the Original Tempter and all, you’re certainly not being very persuasive.” Whole face wrenched with confusion, Aziraphale stared down at the iPhone that Crowley was still holding out. “I don’t see why I need another phone. I have a perfectly good one in the shop.”
“Yeah, but it’s in the shop.” Awkward, Crowley raked a hand through his hair. He really hated talking about this stuff, tried not to, but he didn’t really have a choice. “Look, I’d feel a lot better if you had that. Multiple methods of getting in touch, y’know. And that way, if I come past the shop and you’re not here…”
A shake crept into Crowley’s voice despite his attempt to sound nonchalant, and he gulped. But with his constant anxiety for Aziraphale’s safety these days, it would be worth a little vulnerability to have the reassurance.
Aziraphale’s expression softened, and he took the mobile. “Very well. I suppose it would be rather helpful for both of us, hmm? If I’m out shopping and my bus breaks down, for instance, I could call you to come rescue me.”
He said it in a dramatic tone, as if proposing the best secret mission ever, and Crowley smiled. “Yup, exactly. I’d rush right over and get you, no question.”
“I know you would.” For a moment, Aziraphale beamed at him. Then he reached out and took Crowley’s hand. “And if you’re fretting about me, you’ll be able to simply call. And even if I’m not in the shop at the time, I shall answer.”
“Demons don’t fret,” Crowley protested, as if he hadn’t fretted nonstop for months over the possibility that something might happen to Aziraphale again. Another fire, or an attack by one of their old Sides…
“Naturally not.” Aziraphale stroked a thumb along the side of his hand, steady and reassuring. “If you urgently need to invite me out for dinner, then, you can call at any time.”
There was a hint in his tone, and Crowley grinned. “How about I take you out to dinner now?”
“Oh! What a lovely surprise.” With a smug look, Aziraphale slipped the mobile in his pocket and took Crowley’s arm. “That sounds delightful.”
---
They did the Ritz. Aziraphale munched his way through a few different dishes, coaxing Crowley to try some. Crowley liked food, but he always lost his appetite when stressed. And although he was loads happier these days, he still vibrated with constant tension.
The food was terrific, though, really enjoyable even though he could only manage a couple bites of each thing. They got a really rich chocolate dessert, and he ate a little of that too. Then, twitchy at the sight of candles on the nearby tables—he’d put a permanent no-candle miracle on their own—he gulped down more wine.
It relaxed him at least somewhat, but leaving the Ritz relaxed him more. He and Aziraphale held hands again as they strolled back to the bookshop, enjoying the walk together even with the evening chill.
Crowley shivered as a breeze whipped across them, and Aziraphale moved closer. They exchanged smiles, and Crowley’s shivering eased. Aziraphale wasn’t fond of the cold either, but he radiated more heat than Crowley.
Back at the shop, Aziraphale pulled his mobile out after a few more drinks. He poked at it and made a startled noise when the screen lit up. “Ooh. It’s very bright, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. You can turn that down, if you like. The brightness, I mean.” Groggy now, Crowley rubbed his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping much. “Thanks for taking it, by the way. It does make me feel better.”
“Good, good.” Aziraphale patted his thigh absently, still studying the mobile. “Now, how does it work?”
Gosh, that was a complicated question. Crowley opened his mouth to explain.
“No, no!” Aziraphale held up a hand. “That was merely rhetorical, my dear. I shan’t have you rob me of the joy of discovery.”
Crowley laughed, not surprised. Aziraphale had bought a computer before Crowley did, and he’d been just as excited to explore that. “Okay, well, lemme know if you have any problems. I might go back to my flat and crash out for a nap if you’re good.”
“Yes, yes, quite good.” Aziraphale fluttered a hand dismissively, then went back to prodding at the phone. “Ooh, I wonder if I can change the pretty pictures.”
Amused, Crowley swooped in and kissed his cheek. “See you tomorrow, angel. Call me if you need anything.”
---
Flames, flames everywhere. Twisting back and forth, screaming for Aziraphale—
A sudden, blinding light broke Crowley out of the dream. He yelped and bolted upright, raising a hand to shield his eyes. “What the fuck!”
“Hello, Crowley!” Aziraphale waved to him from the end of the bed, mobile clutched in his other hand. “I’ve learned how to use the camera obscura on this contraption!”
“It’s just a camera, angel.” Everything was still blurry from the light. Crowley rubbed his eyes, then squinted at him. “Wait. You learned how to use your camera, and the first thing you did was come over to take pictures of me sleeping?”
“Well, no. Not the first thing. I-I took pictures of some books, just to test it, and it worked!” Aziraphale gave a proud smile, as if he’d just unraveled all the secrets of the universe. “And then yes. I wanted a picture of you. I don’t have any recent ones.”
He pouted, and Crowley’s heart melted with affection. “Later. As a penalty for waking me up, you gotta have snuggles first.”
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hargrove-mayfields · 1 year
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Disabled Billy and Steve Week
Day 4- Personal Heroes
My prompt: the iconic Joyce Byers
-•-•-•-•-
“Oh my goodness, what a surprise!”
Joyce opens her door to a stoop full of smiling faces. Steve, Chrissy, Billy, and Eddie dropped by for a visit to their mother in law. Her warm, inviting home, although no longer inhabited by children, has been a place they can come any time for a nice meal or a trip through old photo albums of either Steve as a little kid, when he was once kindergarten best friends with Jonathan, or of Billy through his recovery when she’d adopted him as her own.
It’s only been a week since their last visit, but since they usually make time for two trips, Joyce, her son, and his three partners, are all overjoyed.
Though Joyce does give a little warning, in between the hugs she gives to each of them, “Before you come in, I have to say, it’s a bit of a mess in here. I haven’t had time to clean.”
Everyone knows who it’s for, because Billy’s ocd has been known to get overwhelmed by things being in places he’s not used to and cause him to start picking his skin to pieces. She doesn’t make a big deal of it or say that directly to her son though, since she knows it’ll make him more likely to react.
Ultimately it must be okay, because Eddie takes the lead and assures her, “We’re just dropping in for a few minutes, Mrs. B. It’s no problem.”
So she steps inside and lets them all in, Steve entering last since he’s pushing Chrissy's wheelchair today. It serves almost as a mobility aid to him too, keeping him upright and stable to lean on Chrissy's chair just a little. His biggest fear is having a cataplexic attack while he’s helping his wife get around, but they all assure him that they can see the signs and help him before that happens.
They settle into the living room, the boys in a row on the couch with Chrissy pulled up right beside them, and Joyce in a soft recliner across from them. Out of nowhere her new baby, her golden retriever, comes dashing into the room, and jumps straight across the three on the couch, demanding pets from all of them.
Joyce chuckles at the puppy she’s been working to train since her nest became empty, “Malty says hello too!”
Eddie taps Maltys wet brown nose, Billy rubs his belly, and Steve tries to catch his wagging tail. It's cute, and reminds Joyce of how young they still are, despite having moved out. Everyday she’s grateful to witness moments like these, after all the hurting her kids had been through.
It reminds her too, that there’s recently been an important milestone in her kids lives she needs to check up on, “So? How is everything at the new place? Tell me everything!”
Something clearly isn’t right when they exchange a look, except for Chrissy of course since she lost the majority of her sight in the accident.
Joyce settles in even more comfortably, “Oh no. I know that look. Don’t hold anything back.”
After a collective deep sigh, Eddie starts, “Stevie got stuck in the elevator on the first day.”
They all grimace, including Joyce. Steve hasn’t done well with enclosed spaces after being trapped underneath the mall. Especially elevators. Joyce can just imagine the panic he’d gone through, and the effects it would have had on his health. Panic attacks make his blood sugar drop, and trying to fix low blood sugar too fast can trigger his narcolepsy. It’s terrible.
Which seemingly reminds Steve himself of another bad fact, as he informs Joyce, “The neighbors have been throwing parties all night.”
This earns a collective nod. At least it’s not life threatening, but it’s still a terrible nuisance. One that Joyce remembers hating when she got her first apartment close to the community college. The affordability was not worth that headache.
It’s sad that this isn’t the end of their list of grievances. One such being a complaint that makes Billy noticeably and visibly angry, as he breaks his silence for today, “There was a fire drill at 3am and no accommodations for Chrissy's wheelchair.”
Now that’s enough to earn a gasp as a reaction. Joyce has had disabled children since Jonathan was born, but somehow it never ceases to shock her just how many barriers of human invention will spring up in the way of her disabled family.
Chrissy decides to change the subject to another issue before Billy gets too steamed about that last one, “And we found a rat's nest under the bed.”
That one is personal. Joyce hates rodents. It’s some sort of phobia she has, where even the thought of one can give her the chills. When Will was seven, he’d brought home an injured opossum from one of his bike rides, and she’d driven the creature straight to Claudia Henderson and her boys to take care of instead of letting it in her house.
Her excuse to little Will and his too big heart was that the Hendersons had more veterinary experience, which was true, but it was still easier than explaining irrational fears to her naive little one.
All of that leaves her unsure what to say, so she is bluntly honest; that’s probably what the kids had wanted coming to her. Joyce sounds sympathetic though, never harsh, “That doesn’t sound like a home at all. You four don’t have to put up with that.”
Steve looks sad as he informs her, probably having already felt the same way, “According to our contract we do.”
But Joyce is not taking no for an answer. Her kids are not going to suffer like that, under any circumstances.
“No, no- I’m married to the ex police chief. I can pull a few strings.”
Sweet Chrissy rushes to assure her, “You don’t have to do that.”
“Oh, I’m going to. My kids are not going to be put in danger because of some shitty landlord.” It was never a question. Joyce takes action right away, planning, and getting them involved, “Billy, Eddie, do you two know if there are any empty trailers near Mr. Wayne?”
Billy looks at Eddie, and Eddie at Billy. This conversation is overwhelming, and she understands when Billy has gone silent again. She even saw him discreetly turn his hearing aids off. He gives little taps and traces lines on Eddie’s hand, while Eddie whispers to him and makes sure they’re on the same page.
Then, as their representative, Eddie brings the conversation back to Joyce to tell her- “Actually the old Mayfield trailer is empty again. An old couple bought it after Max moved in with you guys, but they’re both in care homes now.”
“Good. I have a few phone calls to make. You can stay here until I’ve fixed this. But you four are not going back to that apartment.” Joyce declares, in her ‘and that’s final’ tone only a mother can do with such perfection.
Then she gets up, gives each of them one more hug, and goes into the kitchen to have a little talk on the phone with their landlord.
And on her way out of the room, Joyce may pretend to not see the looks of relief exchanged between Billy and Steve, with an additional smirk on her sons face, or the comforting hand Eddie puts on Chrissy's shoulder, all signs that this was planned, and they knew she’d help them out of a tough situation.
She’s just glad her boy and his partners trust her so deeply. There’s no need to bring it up. Not when she gets to see the joy and relief on their faces when they’re moving into their very own trailer a week later, the delay only because Wayne and Jim had worked together making the trailer more accessible.
From redoing the stairs and building a wheelchair ramp, to lowering a couple of counters in the kitchen and taking out the island, the space was much easier now for Chrissy to navigate, at least, it would be once she got used to the layout and felt comfortable pushing herself again.
So yeah, it was worth it. Joyce hugs her kids one more time, and maybe sends a secret middle finger to the sky, and everyone who told her adopting her Billy would be too much trouble.
~~~~~~
Let’s talk about Disability Foundation.
Focusing on individuals with physical disabilities, this Canadian foundation partners with six other charitable societies, as well as listening to disabled folks themselves, to provide opportunities for accessibility. Their founder was himself a disabled man who realized that he could help other people like him who wanted more from life.
What this means is that they organize activities that are usually not adapted for us. Their goal in doing this is to keep disabled folks feeling involved, active, and free. It can be frustrating being stuck inside a lot of the time, I know from experience, and this foundation tries to help those with physical disabilities have more options of things we can do.
Inspiration and empowerment are just two of the benefits of realizing that something previously deemed impossible for you is now possible. The foundation acknowledges the barriers that exist even in already accessible places, and works to help disabled folks overcome that as well.
They accept monetary donations, which can be applied to all programs, or just those that need it most, and also volunteer work.
If you’re interested in any of that, you can visit the site right here!!
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many-gay-magpies · 8 months
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HELLO CAN I HEAR MORE OF THE WOLF GIRL MURDER CRYPTID???
She sounds so. So. I beg yuo………..
YES YES OH MY GOD ABSOLUTELY
dude you do not even know I have been trembling like an anxious chihuahua just waiting to be able to go full feral about her to someone. this rocks
OKAY SO. the entire story kind of started because i was listening to a song and i was like you know what this would be great for? being the backing track to a cold open where some girl is running through the woods mid-panic attack after having just killed someone. then it kind of grew a plot from there.
(me, foolishly: oh this will probably not take too long or take up too much space. clearly i forgot just how Able i am to ramble when prompted. put the rest under a cut bc it got LONG)
the cryptid wolf girl herself is named rosalind, or roz for short, or possibly rory for short once she figures out some gender stuff later on... the Central Relationship in the story is between her and her little sister anna. they did... NOT have a great life growing up—dad was an abusive alcoholic, mom was a DEPRESSIVE alcoholic and even when they split up, mom kinda left roz to raise/take care of anna completely on her own... things are better now; mom has cleaned herself up and is trying to be better—but like. that messed roz up lmao. go figure.
so for their whole lives growing up, roz and anna were kind of glued together... ROZ was more of a parent to anna than their own mom, and anna went to her for everything. but in the time of the story, anna's started to Grow Up and Grow OUT of needing her big sister for everything, AND ON TOP OF THAT she's just got herself a boyfriend who fucking sucks and reminds roz WAY too much of their dad... (in my mind I feel like when their parents split and dad left, roz was old enough to actually understand how abusive and shitty he was, but to anna it just seemed like he'd abandoned him, so she's probably a bit stupid about relationships because she's searching for the love she never got from her father/searching for a bandaid to the feeling of abandonment she has from him, but she isn't exactly the healthiest about that and latches onto the first guy that shows her attention, thinking it's Love.)
anyways, this whole deal—anna getting distant, anna being stupid about her bf—makes roz feel Some Type Of Way. she's kind of latched onto her position as anna's pseudo-parent as the crux of her self-worth, so now that anna seems to not NEED her anymore she does not take it well. she wants to protect anna from her toxic bf and from HERSELF, but she can't do a thing and just feels useless because everything she TRIES just ends up pushing anna further away from her. then on her birthday, when she's at her friend's house to celebrate (the best friend she's gay af for, zoe), she makes a wish to be able to protect anna like she used to—aaand the literal moon overhears and basically goes "you have a noble desire, i'll give you my blessing" and turns her into a werewolf (sort of - it's not a whole "turn every full moon" deal, just whenever there's a specific trigger)
anyway like a week after roz's bday when she makes the wish, it's homecoming, and her mom (who is also stupid and just thinks roz hates mark (anna's bf) because she's jealous) has asked her to drive anna to this party mark invited her to... which is in the middle of the woods. with a whole bunch of older high school guys. sure, mom, that's bound to be perfectly safe and legal.
roz has been feeling a little off all week and having weird dreams (unbeknownst to her thanks to her new lunar benefactor). after homecoming, she drives anna to her party... but there is NO FUCKIN WAY she trusts those dudes with her, so she sneaks up to spy on them from the bushes to make sure they're not getting up to any unsavory shit and hurting her little sister. (spoiler alert: they absolutely get up to tons of unsavory shit.) so roz is watching these guys, and it's literally all guys, like anna is the ONLY girl, and they're all older—and they're drinking alcohol, getting progressively more wasted, and anna is refusing but mark keeps pressuring her, and eventually he makes some vague allusions to ah... "loosening her up" with the alcohol so he can have his way with her, while touching her in not-so-great ways... and seeing that triggers roz's first transformation. she just full-on catapults in and tears him to SHREDS, literally. then someone stabs her with a beer bottle and she flees, turns back human, and starts freaking the fuck out because she just killed mark.
okay um. i did not intend to just tell you the entire story up to the point that ive written it. but OH WELL I DID! hope u enjoyed that lmao.
the whole premise of the story is that, despite how much it sucks at first, roz being a werewolf actually kind of brings her, her mom, and her sister closer together... the thing is, the moon, when it heard her wish, it didn't just give her what she asked for—it gave her what she NEEDED. and in general i have lots a feelings about werewolves as the representations of our deepest, most repressed emotions and desires, like if you've seen the whole thing about like "the werewolf is the part of you that LOVES YOU. it is the part of you that is mad at how wrongly you've been treated and wants to PROTECT you." yeah. and i have lots of feelings about the MOON and moon deities as gods of honesty, vulnerability, and seeing the truth of our deepest emotions...
so the wolf is kind of all roz's anger issues just smushed into one big wolfy body. a big theme ive started exploring with the story is that being a werewolf isn't exactly CHANGING roz or making her feel things she's never felt before (like, you know. the murder urges), it's just bringing things she ALWAYS FELT to the forefront and making them unignorable. because above all what roz NEEDS is something to force her to face herself to be able to overcome all the self-hatred she has (because BOY SHIT THERE'S A LOT OF IT). which is also where her relationship with zoe (who ive thought, written, and posted about almost more than the relationship between roz and anna... whoops) comes in.
roz and zoe are best friends. they have been since they were five years old, and zoe has been with roz through like ALLLLL the shit of her seventeen long years. roz is incredibly gay and absolutely in love with zoe, but doesn't realize because she's a fucking dumbass and thinks that's a normal way to feel about her best friend (or, like, maybe she kind of knows something's Different and knows what it IS, but she can't ever let herself realize it fully because ✨internalized homophobia✨).
when the whole wolf thing starts out, roz doesn't tell zoe what's happening, because she's afraid zoe will be afraid of or disgusted by this part of her... which she likes to think is the wolf's doing, but she knows it's really ALWAYS been a part of her. roz keeps the secret from zoe for a WHILE because of this, and keeps pushing her away, but zoe (who Knows roz and loves her back just as intensely) will NOT fucking let her. so there's gonna be like this whole stage of incredibly painful pining, where the moon goddess makes roz realize that she's in love with zoe, but she still hasn't even TOLD zoe about the whole werewolf thing, so there ensue events like: roz in wolf form subconsciously seeking out zoe, breaking out of her house in the middle of the night, going to stand below zoe's window, and then waking up in the morning thinking it was a dream until she sees her window is open and her pajamas are shredded to all hell and goes "shit".
eventually, of course, zoe DOES find out (either by accidentally witnessing a transformation one day or because roz finally caves and tells her, i havent decided yet), and spoiler alert, she isn't disgusted or afraid—she's actually, like, wildly attracted to the feral bloodthirsty vengeful side of roz, because that's the embodiment of roz's deepest, more true self, and zoe has wanted nothing more than to know roz completely—and of course it still takes roz a while to realize zoe's wide-eyed, drop-jawed stares at her are not FEAR but I'M SO GAY IM GONNA OASS OUT HOLY SHIT, because she's fucking stupid.
another honorable mention character: himbo soccer team boy tentatively named matt (gonna change either his or mark's name cuz they're too similar) who witnesses roz partially-transform by accident one day and decides he's going to be absolutely ride-or-die for this tormented lesbian werewolf. he's there for her until she finally gets her shit together and tells zoe what's going on, and long after that. they become a cute little bestie trio and matt ABSOLUTELY realizes how gay roz and zoe are for each other before roz does and he's like JESUS CHRIST JUST KISS ALREADY
(also. most worthy of mention in the yet-to-be-written zoe-and-roz scenes i feel feral about: there's gonna be one after zoe finds out where roz has a really bad transformation, and passes out still wolfed-out in zoe's lap... and she's visibly having a nightmare (plus she's still a wolf which means she's still in crisis mode even though she's sleeping), so zoe starts reading aloud to her while she sleeps until she calms down enough to turn back human... and it starts out as just zoe doing what she's ALWAYS done to comfort and soothe roz, but since roz is ASLEEP it devolves into zoe pouring out her true feelings without roz awake to hear them... then roz wakes up in the middle of zoe reciting shakespeare's sonnet 57 to her and it's like. INSANELY gay. and the whole time matt's off to the side like holy shit.)
ANYWAYS YEAH THAT WAS. A LOT HAHA. I hope u like my feral unhinged asshole werewolf girl :)
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iviarellereads · 1 year
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Nona the Ninth, John 1:20(1)
(Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For detail on The Locked Tomb coverage and the index, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)
(No icon) In which someone murdering one of their best friends is still not the most horrifying part of the chapter.
In the dream they go through long corridors, seeing furniture, stones, bodies, bones, little round pockmarks of bulletholes in the walls, relics of the fighting.(2) Eventually he animates some of the bones to clear the path for them, and continues his story.
They couldn't get into political conferences anymore, but the president puppet he controlled was still invited, so John got in for free by proxy. Nobody even argued about the FTL plan anymore. They only argued about what to do with John's crew. He found it funny when he had to puppet the president into speeches about how he should be brought to justice.
What he did mind was the state of the first-wave evacuee ships. None of the reports about them passed the smell test. They'd thought the worst the trillionaires would do was set up a pay-for-preference system, so the richest would leave first, with others on future waves, but that turned out to be so naive. One day, M- came to him, looking like she'd seen a ghost. She and A-'s little brother and the nun had been going over bank movements and manifests.
She said, there was no queue, no second or third wave. Half the passengers on the manifests weren't real people. There was one ship of internationals, and everyone else would have bought a ticket, or been "useful".(3) The rest of humanity was being left to die.
I had to have her breathe into a bag for a while, because she hated it when I tried to fix her anxiety attacks with necromancy. When she could talk I was just all, Are you sure. She said, John, there they go!! And I said, Not as long as I have breath in my body.
In the dream-present, the skeletons have opened an entryway, leading to another wrecked room he identifies as the kitchen. He finds cans in the cupboards, and modifies one of the skeletons to have a can opener for fingerbones. Together, he and she eat slippery sugary peach halves with their fingers, and she feels a little better.(4)
The last chance they had was to talk to their government, which was a mistake. They spooked someone, who told someone else, who told the FTL project, who accelerated the timeline to days, not weeks. John was going to have to physically stop the ships from launching, but with so many platforms, he wasn't sure he could catch them all.
C- asked if he could do some sort of miracle in good faith. A- suggested rushing the ships and pulling the occupants out to force the cryo plan instead.
John, meanwhile, was trying so hard to crack the problem of the soul. He couldn't distinguish it from the rest of the energy in the body, not even on the day he'd killed all those people. He could tell it was big, and it was what he was looking for, but not how to use it.
So I said to everyone, I can’t stop them myself, not yet. We have to stall them. We know they need Pan-Euro’s orbital gate access, so let’s make sure they can’t get it. Let’s make sure nobody wants to give them orbital gate access. He said, And all of us looked at the floorboards.
None of them really wanted to use the nuke, but it was good blackmail against the people who had given it to them. So, they went to their clients, and said, Pan-Euro can't give the trillionaires access, they're cutting and running and leaving everyone else to drown. The clients said, fine, but give us back the nuke first so you don't do something crazy.
It took so long, the FTL had started counting down to launch. When a couple of nations asked what the rush was, the project said they were doing a mock run to make sure it's all in order, since prep went so well. John wondered how anyone bought it, and who got paid how much of the money that the trillionaires obviously thought wasn't worth anything anymore, tied to the homeworld as it was.
He said, So here’s us, planning to meet these agents in neutral territory, across the ditch,(5) over in the huddle where the Territory refugees were. They wanted us to pass the nuke back. We all voted to trust them, but A— and G— and M— and I came up with a just-in-case plan. Forty-eight hours became twenty-four so quickly. G— fixed up the case and carried it over alone, with caveats. Nobody liked that. They were all, Shit, John, send someone dead, send a puppet. But I wanted G—.(6) P— volunteered to go with him, but G— said he wouldn’t arm it if P— was in range. P— went off at him, but it was one of those times where he held his ground against her. I remember. She called him a stupid kid.
John had an odd gut feeling before G- got on the plane, so he took him downstairs, and took his arm off, totally painlessly, and regrew him a new one with magic. G- didn't even question it.
He added contemplatively, Should still be around here. The arm, I mean. I stuffed it in the morgue so nobody would find it. I’ve got plans for that arm.(7)
While they waited, the nun kept pushing him about the soul, as if trying to get him to "instantiate the Trinity"(8) and save everyone. Suddenly, C- admitted she was dating N-, and everyone said they'd known for a year, and they had a nun, why not get married here, at the end of all things. N- said that wouldn't be legal, C- said what does it matter. In the dream, he points at the corner where they got married. He made flowers grow for them, but they were weird, and some of the roses had teeth. The brides thought it was hilarious though.(9)
When G- landed and got to the meetup, John informed the crew that G- was a deadman's switch. Everyone lost their minds at him.
I said to them, You think they weren’t just going to shoot him first thing? You think there aren’t six snipers with beads on G—right now? But they weren’t only aggro about G—, they were aggro that a nuke might go off and kill a couple million people. I was like, Guys, it’s fine, they’re Australian. He said, Wow. Talk about jokes with no hope of landing.
The clients, on the other hand, stayed cool and said they wouldn't talk to John until the nuke was disarmed. They weren't even at the meetup, either, they said, so who would he really be hurting? He'd thought of that, of course.
I said, Yes. On that note, do you remember the dead guy you’ve mocked up to look alive, the one who still has executive power over your own nuclear codes, who you gave me total access to?
John had got him into position, with the codes, and made sure nobody around the puppet could stop him. He told the clients they had thirty minutes to stop Pan-Euro letting their gates open for the ships. The clients think he's bluffing, but he says he'd do anything, wouldn't he? He quotes another cow fact.(10)
John's own people were angry with him, too, on the whole. C-, N-, and P- were all having a go at him, A-'s brother and the nun were trying to mediate. Only A- and M- were really on his side, and it was more "we can still save this, walk it back" than really backing him up.
N- said this was going to end with killing millions of people for nothing, this isn't the saving the world that the crew signed on for. He said this is how they would save the world. She said he cares more about punishing people than being a saviour, and be can be "appallingly vindictive".(11)
Worse, they had cultists inside and outside the cow wall, and some of them flipped sides and surrounded them with guns. This is how all the barricades, all the bodies, all the bulletholes were formed. A- thought they'd sold out, but John thought it was more about internal doubt. He wondered if he'd lost some of his friends, too.
The confrontation went down, inside and outside the cow wall. He was still in touch with G- the whole time, and he was holding up pretty well. But, John had a lot to focus on, with him, and the fighting, and the dead politician.
He lost his nerve, and locked himself in a room with Ulysses and Titania because they wouldn't argue with him.
In the dream-present, he leads her out of the kitchen, down to another place, where a body in brown clothes looks awful, and he looks anywhere but at it, but he continues the story here anyway.
M- and her nun yelled at him through the door about not pushing buttons, until M- gave up and went away. The last hour was almost up.
It was only a matter of time before someone I loved caught a bullet that I couldn’t bring them back from.(12) I needed to do something. I couldn’t do anything.
Eventually, it was the nun who turned things around. She asked how he was doing with the soul, he said poorly. After a five minute pause, the nun said she thought she could help, but he had to let her in. He did, and she'd brought P-'s gun.
Standing in the hall, in the dream-present, she recognizes the body. He tells her that's not what she looked like.
At first, he thought the nun was there to kill him, but she said that in trying times it's common to push yourself away from God, but she knows John could do this, if he concentrated. Then she prayed, and she shot herself. He saw the soul hanging there for a second, and with the thanergy conversion, he could see it, could finally conceive of what he was missing. If he could control it, he could remove the bullet from her brain and glue the soul back in.
He said, But I held her soul in my hands and I knew why it had been so hard, because I was tuned in. I was looking at the code. I knew why I hadn’t been able to see anything. He said, When I touched her soul, I touched you. He said, You were the noise that was everywhere. It was like trying to talk to someone down a phone line with someone screaming through a megaphone in the same room. You drowned everything out. You were so huge and so complicated, and you were screaming. You wouldn’t stop screaming. You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad.(13) She said, “I was?” He said, “It wasn’t your fault.”
He realized he wasn't holding two nukes, he was holding three, and compared to her, "the other two were birthday candles."
He left the nun in the bedroom, dead. He didn't even take Ulysses and Titania. While he'd been locked in, some of the faithful had also turned, when the others accused him of "plotting nuclear war or something else wildly unfair." In the kitchen, everyone was just taking turns shooting each other, and they didn't even notice him come back.
Some of the memory gets fuzzy there, barricading with A- and M-, and them being shot in front of him.
He stood there and he said: “Do you remember what I said was coming?” She said, “Yes.” He said, “This is the part where I hurt you. Are you ready?”(14) She said, “Yes.”
He wanted her to stop screaming, he wanted her, "like a caveman wants a wildfire". He reached out and hurt her, but he wasn't strong enough to finish the job. He felt P- die. G- was the last one left alive, until John stopped his heart.
He paused and said, I’m still sorry it was Melbourne, honestly. Love a working tram service.(15)
In the dream-present, he walks back to the kitchen, abruptly.
He knew the nuke hurt her. He ate every death, and he let go the puppet's nuke codes as well, and thousands of missiles and other nukes were launched in response.
He said, First, I became a demigod. I nearly fell out of my body. I put my hand around half the world’s throats. [...] I drank them in, and it wasn’t enough. I needed those ships. I needed to extend my hand. I got it around the throat of the other half. I made them go away too. Then I had control of everything on the surface, but not the ships … birds flying above the fire … kids playing keep-away. He said, I put my hands around your neck. He said, I cupped your soul in my hands. He said, I took you into myself and we became one.(16)
Well, he started to, but there was so much of her. He dropped to his knees, ate dirt until he vomited, until he realized she was too much. This was the hardest part: the human instinct is to take into yourself, and that wouldn't do.
I needed a house to put you in, if I wasn’t going to put all of you in me. I made you one on the fly … I wasn’t even thinking … I ripped half my ribs from my body and made you from the dirt, my blood, my vomit, my bone. He said, I wanted to make you the most beautiful body I could think of.
Here, he notes that he was stressed out and absolutely insane at this point. He was barely himself at all, but he recalled that his Nana had some of his mother's toys at her house, and his favourite of them…
He gave a long, shuddering sigh. “My favourite was her old Hollywood Hair Barbie,”(17) he murmured
He made for her a body, the best he was equipped to form out of his own flesh. He remade them both, putting part of himself in her and part of her in himself. Together, he became like unto God.
But it wasn't enough to stop the ships.
He said, I bit through the sun first. It’s human nature. That started things going. Once you take down the sun, you’re cooking with gas, pardon the pun.
He killed the planets, with her help, even Pluto, and every satellite and craft that was still in-system. But in the end, he could only reach one of the ships, and for a moment, he and she held it in their hand, and he felt their terror. Then they were gone, out of his reach, lost forever because he hesitated.
He said, lightly— “That’s it. That’s the story. That’s what I did.” “Oh,” she said. Then he said— “Do you remember what you said to me once I had done it? When we stood here together?” She looked at him and she said, “Yes.” He said— “You said, ‘I picked you to change, and this is how you repay me?’”(18) She said— “What else did I say?” He said: “You said, ‘What have you done to me? I am a hideousness.’”(19) She said— “What else did I say?” He said, “Where did you put the people? Where did they go?” She said, “I still love you.”(20) He said, “You said that too.”
=====
(1) John 1:20 reads "And he confessed, and did not deny: and he confessed: I am not the Christ." This is supposedly John himself, admitting that he is only repeating the word of the man he believed to be God. Not all of the verses have directly parallelled their respective parts of Jod's story, but some of them just punch right at the core. The fact that Muir was able to synchronize this with the A1Z26 being meaningful, so closely that so many of the verses match their chapters' contents… this is god-tier, Homestuck reference fully intended. Speaking of letterizing the numbers, this nearly completes our message: THE TOWER IS REACTIVAT-. We just saw another mention of a tower last chapter, from Varun. What does it all mean? (2) I think it's worth thinking, here, about the truth of this presentation. It aligns with some of what we have been told is true, and it aligns with some of what we may assume is likely to be true. Is this really just John's idea of what it would look like if the ocean drained around his first bunker? Is it what it actually would look like, or have looked like some weeks or months afterward? Is any of this real? (3) If that word doesn't send a shiver down your spine… (4) I'm so fascinated at how Harrow(?) reacts throughout these sequences that happen in Nona's dreams. How she feels, tied to John even here. (5) At a guess, given context, I'm assuming this is NZ slang for the waters between their islands and Australia. (6) Why did he want G- specifically? Did he want a martyr for his cause? Did he think his reaction times might be subpar in a puppet? (7) What plans could he have for his best friend's arm?! Honestly, folks, the questions this series has left open… (8) Instantiate is hard to describe, but by understanding the three parts of the body (bone, flesh, spirit?) or perhaps the three forms of energy (thanergy, thalergy, soul?), or some other trio of concepts to do with the necromancy, the nun seems to have thought John could become as Jesus, become as God, with ultimate power. Christianity trains you into threes with its Trinity, you see. (9) Sometimes your life is so absurd all you can do is laugh and accept that it is what it is. Especially when the roses grow teeth, I guess.
(10) Most of the time, the cow facts have been things others have used against John in this story. How interesting that now, when he needs to prove how badass he is, how absolutely without limit he is, he quotes one back at them. Cows exhibit mourning behaviour, and I killed them, didn't I? (11) Ain't that a fact, mister "ten thousand years seeking revenge for the moment being described in this chapter". Interesting that he admits it here. (12) Ironic that he said this right before someone did. (13) Of course the Earth was mad. Of course they're screaming at us, in their own way, for what we and our ancestors have been doing to them for these last two hundred years or so, or perhaps the last several myriads of years from a certain perspective. Our lack of stewardship, as a species, over the lands we ought to know better about maintaining. It's the fault of those in power, not those on the ground, but nevertheless. (14) Sweet of him to make sure she still consents to hear the story. (15) John, you absolute goddamn asshole (fond). (16) Lyctorhood is a pale imitation of the first conversion at the Resurrection. (17) If you've ever seen Locked Tomb fans screaming at the Barbie Movie hype or Barbies in general, or a long-limbed blonde with a sword and chains, this here is why. (18) He was chosen, among all the humans on the Earth, he was chosen particularly. Why would she choose him? Just a normal guy? (19) Imagine being a whole damn planet and being stuffed into a Barbie-shaped flesh suit. How horrified must she have felt? (20) But still, her love is unconditional. She loved every one of them, and she loved him, and she loves him still though perhaps... just perhaps... she's still not entirely sure what that word means. And Nona still loves us all, because Alecto once loved us all.
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missywritesfor7 · 1 year
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🌺 Promise Flower | PJM 🌺
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Synopsis: Jimin is a popular dance student and the best one at his university. Mina is a photography student and has known Jimin since high school. An idea for a photo project finds Mina getting closer to him than she ever has before. She learns how big his heart is, but also learns how closely he guards it. Every time she thinks he'll let her in, he pulls away again. Is it even worth the trouble?
Pairing: college student!Jimin x fem!oc
Warnings: depression, anxiety, panic attacks, alcoholism
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Masterlist
|| Ch. 7: Benefits ||
News about the benefit concert for Jimin has spread like wildfire. He doesn’t seem to have any idea, unless he’s really good at acting.
Besides Yoongi, who came up with the idea, a few other dance and music students have volunteered to perform. It’s amazing to see how many people care so much about Jimin to make this happen.
I’ve managed to convince him to go to a benefit concert for “someone who’s name I forgot”. He started complaining about being stuck inside so I took that opportunity to invite him out. I knew he wouldn’t be able to say no.
He’s nervous about facing everyone though, he’s been cleared to walk around without his crutches and he began physical therapy this week. I had to promise him that we’d sit as far away as possible so no one would see him. He claims he doesn’t want to take the attention off of “whoever the benefit concert is for” and would rather stay out of sight. If only he knew this was for him.
Hoseok’s dance crew made it the finals which won’t see him arriving back home until Saturday. It’s too bad he’ll miss everything, but as always he sends his best and reminds Jimin to do his exercises regularly and eat well.
I told Namjoon and Tae that we would be at the concert and they promised to make sure no one would see us sneaking up to the second floor to watch from there. I also told Jin who offered to be the MC, he agreed to make sure people stay in the lower level.
I plan to get us there a little late hoping everyone will be in their seats by then and won’t see us. It proved to be a good idea, we were able to take the elevator up and enter the theater unnoticed.
Jin is already on stage bringing smiles to the crowd before the performances begin. Jimin looks on with a smile happy to have a night out.
The first performance begins with a string quartet accompanying a couple of waltzing dancers. It’s a mesmerizing performance but I keep catching myself looking at Jimin. He maintains his focus on the stage absorbing each performance and claps enthusiastically after each one. He smiles with pride watching his friends and classmates take the stage. It’s so endearing and he just looks so adorable.
Jin comes out before the final performance to announce how much money had been raised. I don’t know why this is making me nervous. There’s a decent sized crowd here, much bigger than I expected, so I’m sure enough money has been raised to cover Jimin’s tuition. Still, my heart continues its heavy palpitations.
“Are you guys ready?” Jin yells to the crowd.
Everyone in the audience cheers in excitement. Even Jimin, who’s still unsure of who the money is even being raised for, is at the edge of his seat waiting to find out.
“You guys,” Jin says reading a piece of paper in his hand. “We didn’t raise the goal amount.” The crowd falls silent in disappointment. “We raised DOUBLE the goal amount for Jimin’s tuition!”
Jin waves his arms in the air and the crowd erupts in cheers and applause. Jimin is staring in disbelief with his mouth hanging open. He looks at me but can’t seem to speak, he only points to himself with a questioned look on his face.
“It’s for you,” I nod with a smile. “Everyone wanted to help you so you won’t have to worry.”
“You all did this for me?” He whispers. “Everyone was performing for me?”
“Of course. You deserve all of it.”
Jin leaves the stage and Yoongi steps up to take his seat at the piano. Of course Yoongi would be saved for last. He begins playing as Jimin looks on with his eyes that have now grown 3 times their size.
Yoongi’s song is light and soft and his fingers dance across the black and ivory keys with the perfect amount of smoothness. He looks like he’s swimming as he gets deeper into the song.
He may not say much, but there’s no denying his absolute musical genius. He’s produced songs for a few hip hop artists, and is the most professionally credited person at this school, but here he is playing piano for donations to help his friend.
Jimin is going through a range of emotions. I notice a tear start rolling down his face while he smiles on keeping his focus on Yoongi. One tear turns to a few, and then an endless stream soaks his face all the way down to the collar of his shirt. I pull some tissue out of my purse and hand them to him.
“Thank you,” he whispers with a smile. “So much.” He wipes his tears but doesn’t turn his attention back to the stage just yet.
“You don’t have to thank me,” I say. “This was actually Yoongi’s idea, the rest of us just helped out.”
“Yoongi’s idea?” He looks back towards the stage and smiles fondly. “How could I ever repay you all?”
“You don’t have to. All we want is for you to focus on your recovery, which is why we took care of your tuition so it won’t be a problem.”
He continues looking on as Yoongi finishes his song and Jin returns to the stage to wrap things up and once again hype the crowd about doubling the donation goal.
Jimin is even more nervous about facing everyone right now so we stay behind until the place clears out. As we wait Namjoon, Tae, and Jin, who are the only ones that know we’re here, come up to see Jimin and say hi.
He’s embarrassed to have them see him with his eyes red and puffed from his tears, but he’s beyond grateful. They all give him a hug and tell him how happy they are to see him.
This concert has filled him with a fresh sense of optimism and joy. He’s barely able to see with the way his eyes close almost completely when he smiles. When I get him back home I have to keep him from bouncing around on his leg too much.
I know he hates to feel indebted to people, and he always feels indebted even when he’s told that it’s a gift, but right now I swear he could fly. The car ride back he cycled between tears of joy, sadness, and gratitude all in one short trip.
We get inside and he heads straight for the kitchen.
“Let’s celebrate!” He shouts with a big smile. He opens the refrigerator and pulls out a bottle of soju. “I haven’t needed my pain medicine lately so I can drink and I want to celebrate!”
“Sure!” I follow him into the kitchen and laugh as he bounces around on his one good leg. “I’m glad you’re happy.”
“Mina, I’m more than happy, I can’t even explain it!” He places his hand over his heart and smiles brightly at me. “I didn’t even know that many people even cared. I don’t really know how to explain it but I feel really motivated. I want to get better and I want to dance, and then I’ll dedicate my comeback concert to everyone that supported me.” He pours a couple of glasses of soju and hands me one. “Thank you for being here with me. Even if it is for your project.” He winks and raises his glass before inhaling the entire thing in one go.
“Not just for my project,” I mumble before downing my drink too.
“Another,” he says refilling the glasses.
Another turned to a few more then a few bottles gone. We’ve made our way to the couch and have something playing on the tv but we’re not sure what it even is. We keep talking nonsense to one another, giggling and playfully throwing the decorative pillows at each other.
“Mina, are you going home?” He asks suddenly.
“What? Now? No. I can’t even see straight. I’m staying here.” I laugh leaning over and laying my head across his lap.
“Good,” he giggles. “Stay here.”
“Where else would I go?”
“I don’t know. You’re always here.” He laughs then stops abruptly. “Why?”
“What do you mean why?”
“Do you like me? I mean really like me?”
“What?” I ask sitting up surprised by his question. “What are you trying to say? You think I like you?” Well yes I do, but he doesn’t need to know that. Not now. Not unless he feels the same?
“You do?” He whispers.
“That’s not what I said!”
“You’ve been here all week and I haven’t seen you touch your camera once. I tried to tell myself I was just being crazy, but you really like me…”
“Jimin, you’re being crazy. Stop talking.” I’m drunk and weak, if I don’t stop this conversation now I’m going to find myself slurring some half coherent profession of my feelings for him. I can’t embarrass myself like that.
He leans in close to my face and smiles.
“Why didn’t you ever say anything? I like you too.”
“You what?” No way he just said that. I heard him wrong, right?
“I had a lot of soju.”
“Yes. But what?”
He closes the few inches between us and stops just short of brushing his lips with mine. My heart is beating out of my chest as I look into his eyes. His smile has turned into a smirk and although he’s been cute and endearing all day, his look has suddenly changed to dominant and intimidating. I’m frozen unsure of what to do. What my brain is telling me to do isn’t the same as what my mind is telling me to do, the conflict is paralyzing.
“I’m afraid of making a mistake,” he whispers against my lips. “But I don’t know if I’m able to stop myself right now.”
Before I can open my mouth to stutter some sort of response he presses his lips into mine. He feels so soft and tastes so sweet. He pulls back for a second and I just stare at him. I still can’t speak, so I give up all control of my body and let my heart guide me.
I lean in and kiss him again not wanting to let the feeling of him get away just yet. I can feel his hand caressing my arm and pulling me closer to him. No, I don’t think I ever want to let this feeling go. Everything in me has been released and I can’t hold back anymore.
Tasting his lips has evolved to tasting the inside of his mouth. Our tongues tangling with each other leaving us with no room to breathe. His hand slides down my arm and wraps around my waist sending a wave of goosebumps through my entire body. He leans my back across the couch and positions himself between my legs, all while never releasing my lips.
Fuck he feels amazing. His pillowy soft lips, his soju stained tongue, his incredibly fit body pressed against mine. I would love to suspend time right now and hold on to this for as long as possible.
He pulls back a moment and looks down at me. I nearly whimper as the loss of his lips leaves me feeling cold.
“What are we doing?” He whispers.
“Making out?” I say after a short pause.
“No, I mean,” he chuckles. “We’ve had a lot to drink.”
“Yes?”
“Maybe we should get some sleep.”
“Maybe?” I raise my eyebrow trying to figure out what he’s trying to say.
He sits back up and looks down at me for a brief moment.
“Yeah,” he says grabbing my arm and pulling me off the couch with him.
“Jiminie, what are you doing?” I ask as we stumble our way to his bedroom.
“Jiminie?” He asks. Hoseok calls him that all of the time, but it has just occurred to me that this is the first time I’ve called him that. Out loud.
“Uh yeah maybe we should get some sleep.” I usher him into the bed and lay on the opposite side, which has become my place since I’ve fallen asleep in his bed a number of times these past few weeks. We always keep Blossom the stuffed cat between us to set our boundaries.
However, boundaries seem to no longer exist when we’re four bottles of soju in. As soon as we both are able to get ourselves tucked in, my body finds itself rolling over to Jimin’s side and resting my head on his chest. He snakes his arm around me and places a soft kiss at the top of my head.
Without saying any more we both fall asleep cuddled up with one another.
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ravenspeakrp · 2 months
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KELLY BAUDELAIRE is looking for their RENTER!
MUN INFORMATION
Name: Caiti Character: Kelly Baudelaire URL: Kelly Would you like to be contacted regarding details of this connection? Not necessary, but definitely open to it!
CONNECTION INFORMATION
Relationship type: platonic Name: UTP Age Range: 35+ Species: UTP FC suggestions (if any): UTP Provide a description of the connection: Renter needed/wanted. Kelly is a lifetime resident of Raven’s Peak, and she lives in Blue Horizon Marina, but not the nicer part of it. She’s in the area that deals with flooding and storms. Between slow tourism in the off-season, hospital bills from her recent attack, and not being wealthy to begin with, she needs more income. She’s doing her best not to let her family know she’s having issues because Kelly always thinks her issues should come last, and they’ve been having bigger problems and more drama than a little money trouble. The renter’s bedroom and bath would be over the garage – which Kelly only uses for storage because she can’t afford a car. She’s a neat person, so there’s room for a car/small truck/bike and that would be available for the renter. If they’re around at dinner time, she’s likely to invite them if she has anything worth the name to put on the table, but they won’t have keys to the house because she does have a few trust issues. (And she’s fairly certain her dad and/or sibs might have a litter of puppies if she let them have a key.) Anything else (inspiration or any other details you’d like included): Kelly Beaudelaire
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taiblogcomics · 2 years
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Anach’s to Grind
Hey there, durians. All right, we're in the last stretch for this volume. Six out of 18, that is something! We'll take a break from this series after this, for your sanity and mine, but first we gotta actually get through it~
Here's the cover:
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All right, this one I get. It's Survivor by way of The Breakfast Club. I don't think either of those are teen murder series either, though I can't say for certain. Weird mash-up. Also, I think the Breakfast club reference is technically wrong, because while Darkhawk's pose is close, everyone else is standing up. And for issues with the internal logic of this, if Hazmat wore that little clothing, they would all have severe radiation poisoning right now! Kind of what makes her named "Hazmat", y'know? All things considered, though, an enjoyable cover. Probably the best of the lot so far.
So last episode, Arcade decided to spice things up by causing an earthquake and setting a challenge to reach a saferoom for a "first come, first served" prize. We also learned what a piece of shit Kid Briton is, and that Deathlocket is probably behind all the nighttime attacks, and that this series isn't one I'm enjoying!
So we open with Anachronism and Cullen Bloodstone hauling themselves out of the river, in which they fell last issue. Nara the fishgirl also survived her trip into the river, and she's raging and bitching about it aloud. And then suddenly she stops yelling threats after Kid Briton's retreating party, and tells the other two to grab hold of something. And without warning, an enormous flood of water bursts forth and sweeps through the canyon. The lads don't have a chance to grab something, so Nara hauls them to the surface, and the trio rides the raging rapids downstream.
So this issue's focus character is Anachronism, and we drop into one of his flashbacks. So his whole deal is that he's a teen boy who suddenly inherets the body of an immortal Celtic warlord. Same mind, new body, new urges. Kind of a Captain Marvel situation, but without the transformation and magic word. He's just kinda stuck that way, which is making school life awkward. Nara makes a pass at him now that he's beefed up, but Kid Briton shows up and knocks Anachronism around, still taunting him about being a loser despite the makeover.
Meanwhile, we drop in on Hazmat's group. Reptil's still not great, but he's at least on his feet now. He knows he's not doing great, though, and wants to take a minute to rest. Hazmat's unwilling to break up the group, though, so he trudges onward. On the way, though, Hazmat steps on some sort of mine that sprays gas into the air. No ordinary gas, though: it's the trigger scent that sets X-23 into a blood frenzy. X-23 leaps towards Hazmat, claws out, but luckily Reptil has recovered enough to turn into a pterodactyl and fly Hazmat away, leaving X-23 screaming in fury.
The Runaways and Cammi reach the supply drop location first, and... don't go for it. Cammi cryptically suggests that it might not be worth it, and opts to just sit nearby and watch. And at the same time, Anachronism's group haul themselves out of the river. Nara is still bitching about Deathlocket until Cullen points out it's obviously all Apex's doing. There's an extremely lame joke here, where they use Apex's real name, Katy, in their accusations. Who invited Deathlocket into the group and knowingly manipulated Kid Briton? Katy did.
We get a brief scene of Hazmat and Reptil reaching Safe Zone 3, before we cut over to Kid Briton's group approaching the supply drop at Safe Zone 2. And then we're over with Anachronism and friends, who have decided to head away from the supply drop and find a different safehouse. Nara explains why Kid Briton is a right shithead (he bullies because his powers work on confidence, but now that Anachronism is bulked up, he bullies out of fear of retaliation), and that Anachronism should stand up to him. He doesn't like to fight, though, and while she's explaining why that's also bullshit, the lot of them are suddenly teleported.
And they're teleported right next to the supply drop, and declared the winners just as Kid Briton's group rolls up. Anachronism, to his credit, recognises that this is obviously a setup by Arcade, but Nara decides to lean into the trap anyway. She confronts Apex, revealing she's put it all together, and Apex gives her sarcastic congrats. Kid Briton tries to play mediator, but Nara immediately punches him out, to his absolute shock. Not so confident now, I guess. Apex orders Deathlocket to blast Nara again, and as she's warming up a laser, suddenly an explosion goes off between the lot of them.
It's Cullen, who decided to raid the supply drop while everyone else was being an idiot. And inside it was a bunch of cakes and also guns. He shoulders his new bazooka, and he and Anachronism help Deathlocket up. She's no longer under Apex's control, but they're keeping an eye on her to keep her out of the fight. And what a fight it is. The girls are fightiiiiiiiing! This goes on for a while until Apex (who's losing) orders Kid Briton to help her. And Nara goads him on, taunting him for being weak.
Well, King Asshole of Child Murder Island doesn't appreciate this, and pulls out his magic glowing sword and starts fighting Nara instead. The insults start flying as much as the blades and the fists do, and it's beginning to boil over. Kid Briton is literally seeing red. But before he can land a blow on Nara, suddenly Anachronism steps in. And snicker-snack, with a flash of his axe, off goes Kid Briton's head to end the issue. And normally I decry these deaths, but A) it's not an established character, it's an OC made up for the story, and 2) he was a terrible, unlikeable person with no redeeming qualities. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving guy~
The previous issue is still worse, but I don’t really have anything positive to say about this one either. Other than the brief bits of the Runaways and Avengers Academy kids, this is all Team Braddock stuff, and it’s very hard to care about story when it’s all focused on unlikeable assholes you have no attachment to. Much like Kid Briton’s head has no attachment to his body anymore! This is originally where I left off reading back in the day. I gave it a try for one trade, and found it very hard to care about any of it, so everything after this is gonna be new to me. I know it doesn’t get any better, but maybe it’ll at least be interesting to see how bad it does get.
Later, though! I think we need a palate cleanser after all that, and I did get a new shipment in a few weeks ago... So finally we can get off Child Murder Island and go back to that magical land of Equestria for a couple months~
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honey-lemonz · 3 years
Text
Kokushibou [Satisfied smut]
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Xmale reader
3rd
Warning! Sexual Content!
Includes: stress sex, fight then fuck, koku being a bratty bottom, biting,blowjob, marking, multiple orgasms ,multiple rounds, over stimulation,  dirty talk, fighting during sex, degradation (heavly). Hiding, slapping, spitng, and a spite fuck. Goodness..Enjoy!
Kokushibou pushed the archer against the wall as both were fighting.
For almost 7 hours.
(M/n) or the archer was happily living on his land and was fine but. The dam fake Samurai had other plans to upset that. Like attacking him. Gods they hated each other..
To the point it was not comical.. no no.
Sexual almost.
Two strong men grunting and groaning, one with blood all over him..for being the one with more hits. Sweat on their bodies and one with his hair arrayed. Kokushibou was losing it.
Internally and externally.
Internally he could not understand why he was feeling slightly aroused in battle, especially with this fucker. The archer demon named Yasumebu (M/n). A demon he hates because he reminds him of his late twin.
Someone who is superior and most likely would be superior to him.
He felt his cock trying to poke in his hakama pants. His kimono was sticking to the sides on his body as he was forced on to the ground. Yasumebe was about to prepare an arrow until..
Kokushibou moved his leg to reveal he was aroused but no on purpose or on invitation. But (m/n) was the only other demon around who could have done this to him. To him it was weird. He froze the arrow and squinted at the Samurai.
He but his foot on Kokushibou's growing hard on and moved it without any sign of being gently. 
Kokushibou groaned and hissed at him. About half of his eyes, the three on the left pinched shut. It was not out of pain but only pleasure. This made Yasumebe..disgusted to say the least.
But also he wanted to kill the upper rank for what he had done...but torture is always a better cause.
"Look at you..you pervert. Getting aroused with me in a fight you picked..how promiscuous..really are that much of a bastard you need a dick in you to make you feel whole?"
He moved his foot more vigorously, it made the upper rank squeak but not moan. No! He will never get any sign of pleasure from him. "I-I am not, aany an c-can get aroused. Never for oor from you-"
"Oh cut the bullshit you bastard. You attack me in my home and demand I die so you an be the best? Or is it jealousy? Jealous of me to the point you want me to fuck you? Make you a proud man with my cock stuffed into all your slutty holes?"
Kokushibou's six eyes widen. He dropped his sword from the feeling. What feeling is this? He asked himself. Demons cannot blush or anything but he could feel his ears burn and his cock ache and throb.
He hated him to the point it turned him on? Is that possible? No.
He hated Yoriichi but they were brothers and that is just wrong...but this dam archer..
Before he realized his mistake of thinking to deep, he got an arrow into his wrist and an arrow shot his sword far away from him.
"Well took you too long to answer the question so it is a yes, isn't it? Gods, I hate you but I always give whores like you a chance. By now you'd probably be satisfied sucking a cock and dying. The great upper rank one? Such a fucking slut.."
The arrow glued his wrist together so he could not move em, he could make another sword but he had to concentrate to do that.  He needed his full energy to do it but his energy was focused on..him..the archer and how he needed t̶o̶ ̶k̶i̶l̶l̶ him.
The archer pulled Kokushibou by his hair next to a stool, he was gracious or caring about it.  He hated him and as did he.
But goodness did he remember how they fought. How strong he looked and how much strength it goes into an arrow. Not that he thought the sport was worth this time, oh never. But him...it made his condition worse. His cock was probably leaking streams of precum.
"Must you fight, I am helping you. Trust me I do not want a whore like you anyways, a good one can shut up and take it..you..most likely are a brat or bitch about it.."
Kokushibou hearing this moved his combined wrist up to scratch the shit out of his arms like a fucking cat.
"Goodness if you want to mark me already! Dam, such a needy bastard...beat how many times you sucked your masters cock all these years...most likely didn't make you choke or gag for the hell of it..but now worries like defeat and death.."
He brought his up to his face. Both were around the same height, so it worked. But Kokushibou was now on a bedding and he was looking up at him. So he felt smaller. He hated it. But it aroused him.
Hate what pleasures you. But between you and I..is not the first he gotten aroused at the thought..
"I make sure to be the one to make it your first.. now if you bite he I cut you cock off too. Got it?"
Hell to Yasumebe it was an excuse to just make him feel a better or worse pain.
"Tsk, as ever I would do as you ask yo-"
He got fucking bitched slapped in the face. "Now I'm going to say this again. You were the one who got to be a perv right? You can suck your masters cock for all of eternity then you can suck a real mans one and not a cowards. Something you need to do. Bite me and you can burn in the sun with my cum all over and inside you. Now be a good brat and suck."
He stood above him with a tight grip on his head and hair. (M/n)'s own cock was out and the marvel it was had the upper rank's mouth salivating.
He just stared at it, like it was something new to him. "What you never seen another mans dick before? Always ready to ride and suck one for you life, so be the slutty brat you are and do what you know best. Go one you need help is my cock to big for your mouth? The one you use to pledge and talk shit? "
In his head he muttered, probably eat it too.
Kokushibou opened his mouth to rebuttal..dumb move. A thick and long length was shoved down deep into his throat. Making his gag on spit and the length. H opened his lower eyes to see not even all of it was in his mouth. The hell?
(M/n) hissed and moved his hips back and forth, he was fucking his face. "Good little slut, do what you know best bastard. Then maybe I can fuck your other hole, maybe even be nice and let you cum.:
Kokushibou groaned on his cock and moved tied wrist to get a grip and move on his own accord, but no avail. His own cock was in need of help. His mind was erasing with how much pleasure would come if he would get fucked like a whore.
Which he is.
His tongue lapped at the lip and it moved in and out his throat. He was pumping his cock with his hands at the same momentum. So feverish and so tempting, it make slick warm between his thighs. His ass flexed at the homewreacking feeling.
His large cock pushing in and out of his made him close two sets of his eyes and let where his true ones stay open. (M/n) hissed and pushed his head all the way to the hilt of his cock and made his stay there. Groaning as Kokushibou's mouth filled with an ocean of cum he swallowed.
The taste wasn't as bad as he imagined. His cock spurted some ropes of cum but he knew with how his luck was playing it would not be the first time tonight. He was allowed to breathe and swallow the rest. 
(M/n) looked down at him, his eyes were glossy and he was gasping for air.."Goodness you really are that bad.."
Kokushibou didn't care about his pride or his will, or even the envy. He felt hatred and pleasure. He needed to feel more, it was so addicting. It was like a slow burn he loved. The fire in the pit of his stomach burned for more. To be full , imagining that amount of cum stuffing his tight entrance or making his abdomen bulge..
To be breeded like a mating whore for him..
(M/n) pushed the Samurai to the side of the bedding and for him to be on his front. Ass up, he pulled the rest of his clothing off him. He would often scratch him or put marks he knew he could heal over..if he was concentrated enough.
His plump ass had goosebumps as his breath glazed across it. No kissing rather biting. He bite down on his ass. "For such a plump ass, you and kiss a lot of it aye? Sluts like you can be so troublesome but in the end.."
H sat up and got close to Kokushibou's ear. He moved his already messy and disheveled hair. His lapped his ear lobe and bite down to make it bleed.
"All of you are just bratty whores who need to be taught their place..." Two fingers were pushed into his slicked up entrance and they clung onto (M/n)'s fingers like glue. Kokushibou moaned out curses as he slumped down. He turned his head to the side to he the rest of his.
It felt too dam good. His fingers were so close to his prostate and so close to making his mind wipe to pure ecstasy and pleasure, even if he wasn't at it already. He moaned out without a care in the world. Asking no begging for more. It made (m/n) want to torture him more..
They did hate each other, but to one it was just funny.
"M-more, please fuck me more gods..please..fu-fu~ck.." he cursed as he spread his legs wider to make his fingers go deeper to touch or even at least brush his prostate.
His eyes were closed except the true ones, the only one he could keep open. Upper rank one was glossy and also looked like a bunch of whores eyes. He bucked his hips when his own forgotten and needy cock was slowly getting pumped.
"Wait- WAI- no ahh~" As soon as he pumped his length and pushed deeper into his hole, feeling for his prostate. He came again onto the bedding. He gasped loudly and slumped over. Kokushibou's cock twitched but was still erect.
"Well, what was it you were saying bastard? Or were you too busy cumming like a little whore to even finish? Hmm well it guess my cock can satisfy your perverted self, disgusting."
He spat on his gasping hole and moved his fingers out. The amount of slick or cum on his fingers made him laugh at the pathetic state of the upper rank. "Wow, such a slut for all this? Wonder how easy it is to break your ass and see you go silly."
He yanked almost his hips back up to his waist, Kokushibou swallowed thickly at what was about to happen. (M/n) stroke himself and placed the tip of his cock on Kokushibou's gaping whole.
"One more thing pervert.."
He leaned forward to upper rank one, Kokushibou felt his chilling breath on his ear. All his eyes widen as his cock slowly pushed into him. 
He whispered:
"I win slut.."
He slammed his cock into him, pushing harshly onto his prostate and making the upper rank yelp and moan loudly. He almost screamed, (M/n) gave him no time to adjust. Rather he fucked him ruthlessly. He used his hair and yanked it, making him look at the ceiling and also to feel himself hit deeper and deeper.
Kokusibou was babbling about more and more. Or how he hated him. Just either 'fuck me' or 'i hate you'. The archer demon did not care. He was a slutty pervert who got what he wanted. A good cock with a good fuck.
"Such a tight- little slutty whole..gods, im going to loosen it up for you and make sure no one couuld fuck you like I- ah~could..you'd like that Kokushibou? To be a slut and ask others to fill you with their cocks like I do?"
He thrusted faster and harder, Kokushibo's prostate was abused and he felt himself cum again and again. Due to his unlimited stamina and would be fine. But he was feeling drained, he felt so fucking stupid. He was getting fucked stupid even more.
(M/n) hissed when Kokushibou tightened around him, he groaned and growled as he shot thick ropes of cum into his ass. Filling him over his opacity and making his abdomen stretch to accommodate to the amount. 
All his eyes, closed with tear stains. Kokushibo's head was let go and he fell straight into the bedding. (M/n) looked at him and didn't bat an eye to spit on his face. His lower half was with filled with cum or covered in it. He cleaned himself and took his arrow out of his wrist and gathered the rest.
He looked one more time at the upper rank. The most feared of them all, looking like a slut in heat. He pulled the hair that would have been a neat pony tail but now is just out and disheveled. He made him look him in his eye.
"See now upper rank? Such a pathetic fighter and warrior, you did do one thing. Your were a decent fuck, not the best but decent." he patted his head and walked out the destroyed house.
Soon it was lit on fire. To destroy what ever was left.
Kokushibou luckily got away and out of the suns fury. But he did hate the archer demon with all he had, and envy him so much. But fuck... he sighed as he stroked his cock from the memory.
"He was right.."
His licked away the cum from his ass as he pulled away his fingers and from his hand. His cock throbbed at the dull feeling. The lackluster feeling inside him only his enemy gave him.
"I am such a whore for yasumebe.."
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thefanficmonster · 3 years
Text
Casual
Ranboo x Reader (Female)
Warnings: None, unless talking about the future counts
Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)
Summary: Following the arrival of the dreadful invitation to his cousin’s wedding Ranboo turns to the only cover-up he can think of to keep his still-single status hidden from his family.
Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your wonderful request! I’m so glad you sent your idea to me and I’m so glad you were my first official Ranboo request. I’m really sorry it’s taken me so long to write it but I still hope you’ll come across it and read it! Love, Vy ❤
“Heyyy, so Y/N, I have a favor to ask you...um yeah, call me back, it’s awkward sending it via voicemail. Bye“
Huh - that’s the first thought that goes through my head when I listen to the voicemail left after a missed call from my best friend Ranboo. The favors he usually asks for consist of requesting assistance for his videos in which I also appear with a mask and sunglasses to keep the brand running. I genuinely have nothing against my face being shown but when I think about it, I’m honestly a bit glad people can’t identify me.
Anyways, back to the favors, Ranboo is no stranger to asking me for them but they’ve never been considered too awkward for a voicemail which is why I’m no slightly concerned. I’ve been swamped with work for school and studies for the graduation finals for the past two weeks and it seems like I’ll never get on top of it and I know Ranboo’s been in a similar situation too, so maybe he needs help with that? He’s not used to asking help for school stuff, he sometimes even has a hard time accepting it when I openly offer it to him.
I eventually sigh, decide that playing this guessing game will not get me anywhere and settle on giving him a call as I make my way home from the gym with my legs barely putting up with the task of carrying me around.
He picks up on the second ring.
“Hey! Wh-...“
“Would you pretend to be my girlfriend for my cousin’s wedding next weekend?!“
My legs take that opportunity to stop moving in the middle of the sidewalk which is luckily void of any people at the moment. It’s not my fault my body’s first reaction was to freeze up at the question that came flying at me like an out-of-control jet, almost as though he’s been dying to say it and get it over with.
“Um...run that by me again please, I think I misunderstood.“ I say, blinking blankly as though awoken from a fever dream. No, actually as though I’m IN a fever dream right now.
“Ok, now that the cat’s out of the bag, wanna grab some coffee and talk about it face-to-face. I need to see your facial expressions to gauge what response to expect.“ He says, the previous nervousness gone and his voice calm as regularly once again.
I’m this close to face-palming but I squeeze my eyes tightly shut and bring myself to utter a reply, “Our usual spot. Be there in ten minutes.”
                                                             *  *  *
“No freaking way.“ I shake my head, folding my arms over my chest as I lean back in my seat in the booth we picked when we arrived. Good thing I got an iced coffee cause even a hot one would’ve gone cold by now considering I haven’t yet taken the time to have even a sip of it. I’ve been too busy listening to the long and short of the explanation and begging speech Ranboo probably made last night to try and convince me to agree to this nonsense. “Dude, we’ve been friends since middle school-...“
“Exactly! Who else was I gonna ask?“ He cuts me off, pleading gaze meeting my unimpressed one.
I huff before continuing my previous statement, “We’ve been friends since middle school so you know my opinion on weddings.” I put extra emphasis on the word ‘opinion’, giving him the clear hint at the distaste I’ve expressed on the topic multiple times before.
“And you know we’re on the same page there but there’s no way I can avoid going unless someone kidnaps me.“ He too now gets in the same stance as me, his coffee forgotten too.
I can’t help but snort out a little laugh, “I’d be more than happy to kidnap you considering the other option is far less appealing to me.“
He, of course, rolls his eyes at me as though he didn’t offer to do the same thing so I could avoid an exam but anyways. “So you’re gonna choose to fake a kidnapping that has the potential of landing you in jail over coming to eat some great food and maybe even have some fun at a wedding with your best friend? I’m hurt.“ He says, frowning to cover up the smile that’s fighting its way onto his face.
Now it’s my turn to roll my eyes, “I’d be kidnapping you, dummy...” I cut myself off to let out a long sigh and calm down before I go off at him. His smirk isn’t helping me much with the task either. I’ve known Ranboo long enough to know he’ll eventually convince me and he’s known me long enough to know how to do that exactly. With that in mind, there’s really no point in getting so worked up and wasting my energy. And so, despite my own rationality, I cave. “Fine, but I’m not staying the whole wedding.“
His eyes immediately light up and almost makes me feel the compromise was worth it. Almost. I mean, when you’ve been best friends with someone for so long, seeing them happy is worth more to you than your own comfort sometimes.
And he knows it too. Which is exactly why he outstretches his hand for me to shake and says: “Just one dance and you’re free to go. Deal?”
I take his hand without hesitations. That’s a better offer than I could’ve ever imagined. “Damn straight it’s a deal.“
                                                            *  *  *
“How long until you kick the heels off?“ Ranboo asks, bringing me a non-alcoholic cocktail and sitting down next to me.
I take a sip and giggle, “You kidding? I already kicked them off and replaced them with flats. I need mobility if we dance. They also lower the risk of me severing off a toe of yours if I step on you on accident.”
He laughs, clinking his glass against mine before he gets a bit more serious, “By the way, thanks for handling my family’s attack so well. I know it might’ve been a bit much but you handled it like a pro. Still, I’m sorry on their behalf.”
I shake my head and wave my hand dismissively, “Don’t mention it. I’d probably react the same way if my brother or cousin brought a date to an important family event like this.” I instinctively turn to look in the direction of where the majority of his family has gathered around, chatting with guests, smiling brightly. It’s hard not to immediately take a liking towards these people. They’ve been a second family to me ever since Ranboo and I started hanging out so I completely understand why they were so shocked to see me in the role of his ‘girlfriend’.
“I’ll tell my parents the truth later, our extended family is the ones I wanted to fool to be perfectly honest.“ He looks around as do I and we catch more than a few pairs of eyes fixated on us that turn away when they realize they’ve been spotted, “Mission accomplished by the looks of it.“
I chuckle. I’ve never felt so comfortable at a wedding before. I don’t feel stressed nor anxious despite knowing that there’s quite the number of eyes on me and there are whispers going around about my ‘relationship’ with Ranboo. It’s oddly calming and relaxing to be surrounded by some familiar and some unfamiliar faces. This cocktail is pretty great too.
Speaking of which, if it had any alcohol in it I’d blame it for the decision I’m about to make but this one’s entirely on me: I tap Ranboo with one hand while taking out my phone with the other. “If we’re already the talk of the wedding, let’s give them something to talk about.“ I say as I put up my phone, pretending to be taking a selfie leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek.
When I pull away I can clearly see that he’s still processing what just happened. I can’t help but burst out in a fit of laughter as I reach out to wipe the lipstick stain I left on his cheek. He looks like a lost, clueless puppy with the question: ‘what on Earth just happened???’ replaying in his head and it’s so freaking cute!
Wait....what was that? Since when do I use the adjective cute to describe Ranboo? Didn’t I think he looks handsome in a suit earlier too? The hell is with me today?
Then it hits me - the feeling isn’t foreign. Like, I know I’ve felt it before but I never analyzed it or even bothered to acknowledge it. But now that I do, I’m afraid of what it might be.
“There!“ I say, desperately trying to push the thoughts away along with this little firework show in my stomach, “Now you have pinker cheeks. Well, cheek, singular.“
As if snapping out of his state of confusion, he returns to Earth with a smirk, “Kiss the other to even it?”
Alright, his blush might not be even but mine now is and it’s ten times as intense and very much apparent but I don’t let the feeling shine through anything else as I proceed to actually kiss his other cheek too, wiping the lipstick stain.
“Thanks. You’re the best.” And just like that, as though it’s no big deal, he kisses my forehead.
See, that’s the thing, it shouldn’t be a big deal! It’s never been! This is far from the first time I’ve kissed him on the cheek or the first time he’s given me a forehead kiss. These are regular occurrences after years of this lovely friendship we have. Why do they feel so different now?
Then, much to my relief, the music starts and the lights turn off leaving only one spotlight for the groom and bride to have their first dance. They look absolutely astonishing and I can certainly say I’ve never before stopped to think that about any newly weds of the weddings I’ve preciously been to. I don’t know if it has something to do with the company I have for this particular wedding or it’s maybe the fact that my mindset’s changed over the years without me realizing.
Then I automatically look at Ranboo who just so happens to be looking at me too and all I can say is: my mindset hasn’t changed.
A loud applause takes over when the couple finish their dance, officially opening the dancefloor for any other pairs who’d like to occupy it and I’m happy to see how many people are eager to rush up with their partner.
 Ranboo gets up, putting the glass down and offers me his hand, “So, wanna dance? Don’t take this as a sign to leave though, we said one dance and you CAN leave, not SHOULD.” He says, giving me a warning look.
I roll my eyes and am about to give him some sass right back but he takes my hand and picks me up from my seat, leading me to the dancefloor.  And I gotta admit maybe it’s a good thing he did. If he left it to me I would’ve probably said no to the dance and ran the hell away. Why? - Cause I’m freaking terrified of this new mindset and point of view and these intense emotions I never used to pay any mind to before in regards to my best friend.
Friends don’t feel that way about friends. Friends don’t look at friends that way. What’s happening to me?
When I gotta look him in the eyes like this, not for the first time might I add, I can finally understand how the friends-to-lovers trope works: it’s all meaningless until it starts to mean so much to you. It’s all platonic until it reminds you of a romantic movie moment. It ‘best friends’ until it’s ‘I wish we were more than that’. It’s all casual, until it’s not.
And, unfortunately, it’s irreversible.
Damn do I wish I ran away now...
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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years
Text
He’s Lost - Bakugou Katsuki - Part 1
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Bakugou x f!reader
Warnings - Angst, Physical Harm, Cursing, accused Cheating, Katsuki’s insecurities
BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST
A/N: This is my first writing piece but this has been stuck in my mind since v-day is coming up so I had to get it out. Plz enjoy!!
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
Summary: Y/N is so busy around Valentine’s, her lack of attention towards her Pomeranian is causing him to freak out and do the worst of the worst
Love is in the air! The birds are singing, The breeze is blowing, the setting sun is shining, and the explosive teen is.....well, bruting.
Can you blame him though? Y/N’s been a little distant ever since February started. Even right now, instead of enjoying their time together in a quiet park, she’s staring down at her phone doing who knows what.
Why? Was he not good enough? Has she gotten tired of him? They’ve only been together for a little over a year. Is she talking to someon- no. Katsuki stopped himself from thinking like that. There’s no way his precious teddy bear would ever do that. Not only that, he was the best there is. Why would she even try to go?
“You dumbass. You’re missing this.” Bakugou sighed. “Huh? What? Missing what?” Y/N looked around looking for whatever “this” was until Bakugou grabbed her chin to force her to look him in the eyes. “THIS DUMBASS! US! You’re so focused on that dumb phone. Jeez, can’t a guy just get his girl’s attention.” Bakugou said dramatically.
It wasn’t that Y/N wasn’t giving him attention, it’s that it wasn’t the same. Yea she right there snuggled into his arm. And yea she was petting his hair just the way he liked. And YES, she was peppering his face with kisses from time to time. But it all felt off? Like only half her energy was put into the love and affection.
“Suki, aren’t u being a little dramatic. I’m right here with you baby. I’m sorry if I’ve been a little distracted. Come here dummy.” And as Y/N pulls Bakugou in for a tighter hug all he can do is release a “hmph” while falling into it...until her phone went (ding!) once again. And she went to check it. Once again.
Bakugou was getting tired so he got up and suggested they’d head back to UA. Y/N only got up and began to walk beside him, hand in hand, while still checking her phone time to time. And Bakugou was getting sick of it
*Wtf is she doing on that piece of junk? What could be so important she would half ass our entire evening together? .....Could she possibly be talking to someone else?............no.* Bakugou let those negative thoughts die down as they continued their journey back.
——————————————————————————
A few days later
“COME ON!!” Bakugou screamed as he realeased a blast towards Kirishima. When Bakugou invited him to train, The red head initially thought it was to ...you know..TRAIN. But after some time, the blonde’s best friend began to see the bigger picture.
“Dude. What’s up with you man? We always go full on during training, but it’s not even like you’re trying to hit me. It feels like you’re just taking your anger out on me.” Kirishima said.
“Congrats on noticing shitty hair, I’m glad somebody’s noticing my damn mood.” Weirded out by his friend’s unusual openness, the red head continued to ask.
“So what’s up?”
“Nothing.”
“But you just-“
“NOPE!”
Bakugou exclaimed as he began to gather his stuff to leave the training area. “BAKUGOU!” Kiri shouted. “WHAT!” “.......it’s Y/N isn’t it?”
Upon hearing that, the blonde turned to look at his best friend with this sad puppy dog look. And man, if Katsuki had doggy ears, everyone would see how low they’d go. His best friend didn’t need to see it though, he could tell those ears would be 6 ft under if they were actually there bc there’s nothing hiding Katsuki’s vulnerability when it comes to Y/N. As the two best friends go to sit on the bleachers, Bakugou takes a deep breath before saying his thoughts.
“I think Y/N is cheating on me.”
“................HUH???!!!!”
Kirishima went from “caring and considerate” to “WHATDIDHESAYYY” in seconds. Y/N L/N?? Cheating?? Ok. Y/N was one fiesty girl, and she definitely had sass, power, attitude, and a little mischief, but she also had kindness, compassion, consideration, and honesty flowing though her. Not to mention extreme loyalty. There’s no way.
“Look man, with all due respect, I think you’ve finally lost it.” The red head laughed. “I’m being serious shitty hair.” The blonde stated. “She’s been so distracted lately. She’s always with me but it’s like her mind is also somewhere else. And not to mention that damn phone she’s always on now. She can’t go 30 minutes without checking it at least twice. And not only that, when she does leave to do whatever, she’s gone for hours at a time! What’s a guy supposed to think with all of that?! I mean it’d make sense if she wanted to leave. I get it, I can get loud, and yell, and I get angry a lot but.. she knows I never mean it, right? I call her a dumbass like i do everyone else...ugh but she isn’t just everyone else, she’s my girlfriend and she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.....SO WHY TF IS SHE CHEATIN-“ before the blonde could continue, his best friend cut him off.
“BAKUGOU” “WHAT??!!” “....talk to her.” Kirishima said. “What?” Bakugou asked. Kirishima continued. “Cheating is a real sensitive topic in a relationship. I don’t wanna give my opinion on something that could ruin something amazing. C’mon man, we both know Y/N isn’t like that but who am I to tell you what to do. I wanna help, I do, but I think it’s best if you go to her with all this. Honestly though, if you asked me, Y/N would be the last person I’d ever think of when it came to cheating on ANYTHING. Especially the guy she cares so much about.” And with that last sentence, Kirishima stood up from his spot and pat Bakugou on his shoulder before exiting.
With Bakugou left with nothing but his thoughts and Kirishima’s advice, he left and headed straight towards your room.
——————————————————————————
“Shut up!” You excitingly screamed though the phone. “You really found the last part?”
“Yup, it only took about 6 different stores across the entire city.” Shinsou sarcastically replied. “You owe me.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know and I appreciate it. Katsuki’s gonna love his gift!” You said.
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, you’ve been preparing only the best Valentine’s Day surprise for the best boyfriend in the world. You’ve been so busy planning your surprise that I guess you could say you haven’t been giving Katsuki the massive amount of attention he’s used to from you, but you can definitely say it’ll all be worth it when he sees one of his presents that you’ve been working on. A silencer for his gauntlet blasts that not only decreases the volume of his attacks, but also increases his attack power. You remember how Bakugou had vented about his attacks being too loud that they scare people, but when he tried to keep them quiet, the attack isn’t as powerful so saving can be quite difficult. He only spoke about it once, but you could see the look on his face whenever he was out using his quirk around civilians. So why not give him a device that’ll help with his loud little problem. Now were you a support class student who knew how to make support items? Hell no. But were you a loving girlfriend willing to give her man the best Valentine’s Day ever? Hell yeah.
The piece of gear would’ve been easier to make IF it weren’t for a pesky piece of the project getting destroyed by Shinsou after he made Denki electrocute himself while he was right next to your prototype on the table. So to make it up to you, Shinsou went all around town looking for the piece you needed to complete your support item for Katsuki. Finally, all pieces had come together.
“He better. That damn bastard doesn’t know how amazing his girlfriend is. Instead of ignoring his ass these past few weeks, you sent ME to get all this shit for you so you could keep your precious Pomeranian happy.” Shinsou said while rolling his baggy eyes.
As Bakugou approached the outside of your dorm room’s door, he heard your voice.
“You know, you’re so right. That Pomeranian is unaware of just exactly how amazing I am. I really could’ve left whenever but I stuck around.” You snorted. “Well I’m glad I had you with me through it all Shinsou.”
*Pomeranian? SHINSOU?!? Through IT ALL?!?!? YOU WERE WITH THAT PURPLE HAIRED, SLEEP DEPRIVED ASS MIND CONTROLLING FREAK?!?? AND YOU WERE WITH HIM THE ENTIRE TIME YOU’VE BEEN DATING BAKUGOU?!?*
Oh to say Katsuki was pissed was an understatement. He felt all these emotions hitting him all at once. Anger, Disgust, Pain, Betrayal. It all became too much for him before Katsuki ran away from your down with his bed down and silent tears hitting the floor. When he let himself fall to the floor in the privacy of his room he screamed into his hands. His first love, his first real relationship, his teddy bear betraying his love, loyalty, and trust for over an entire year. After hours of crying, Katsuki was able to pull himself into bed. He couldn’t even bring himself to shower even though he spent all that time in the gym with Kirishima. He just wanted to sleep to escape reality. As he looked at his phone, he saw 1 missed call from Y/N, and 1 text saying “Goodnight love💗💥!” Bakugou scoffed at the text. Figuring u must be texting Shinsou the same thing. As Bakugou placed his phone down, an evil thought came to mind. Ruin her.
Bakugou smirked to himself as he had this pyscho and sinister look on his face. He would ruin Y/N. They haven’t officially broken up yet, so he could hurt her just as she hurt him. And Bakugou wasn’t stupid or so he thought he’s aware Valentine’s is coming up, so why not break little Y/N L/N’s heart on a day dedicated to nothing but love and happiness. It’ll be the perfect revenge on a little satin like her. Bakugou finally turned on his side with an evil, satisfied smile, and fat tears in his eyes once more.
——————————————————————————
The next morning, Katsuki got up with a broken heart, but he figured if he wanted his plan to work, he had to fake this smile. Getting up, getting ready, and getting dressed was business as usual, but meeting up with Y/N in the morning was now off the schedule. Instead of going into her room to check on her like he usually does, he just went straight to breakfast and straight to class without speaking to anyone.
With Class 1-A seated and Mr.Aizawa at the head of the classroom, the students can finally start their first lesson of the day. Until, the door slid wide open. There stood an exhausted and quite frankly dishelved Y/N. “My apologies sensei. I was up late last night and overslept. Please forgive me.” Y/N said as she bowed her head in sorry. “Just take your seat L/N.” The tired eye teacher said.
As Y/N walked to her desk, she noticed Bakugou wouldn’t even glance her way. She was a little thrown off since it would be normal for him to at least give her a judgemental look for sleeping in, but no. Nothing.
Bakugou on the other hand was writhing in agony. Oh how he wanted to check on Y/N and make sure everything was fine, but that voice in the back of his head couldn’t help but tell him to ignore her since she’s a cheater. She may have been the girl he’s loved dearest, but she was also the one causing his heart to shatter.
After a few classes, Y/N tried to approach Bakugou several times, but each time he brushed her off. And when the bell finally rang for lunch, you can bet Katsuki was the first one out the door. Y/N followed him of course, in worry and concern.
“Babe! Baby! Katsuuu!!! KATSUKII!” Y/N whined for her boyfriend to at least look at her but once again. Nothing. Bakugou wanted to hug her and hold her tight but he couldn’t. Not after what she’s done. Right before Bakugou entered the cafeteria, Y/N pulled him aside and held onto his wrists.
“Baby? Hey, what’s up with you? I’ve been calling your name and trying to talk to you but you keep brushing me off. You also didn’t stop by this morning. Is something wrong, love?” Y/N was hoping for something. ANYTHING at this point. And it was like the gods heard her prayer because she definitely got....something. “My bad.” The blonde haired boy dryly replied. “....Oh, um, ok suki.” The poor girl just thought her dear boyfriend was having a bad day, so she just left it alone and let him go. But still, even on his worse days he would at least visit her in the mornings. As they sat down with the bakusquad, the entire table noticed how Bakugou sat up and moved across from Y/N after she chose to sit next to him like usual. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife, and Kirishima could already feel what had gone down. He at least knew his bro didn’t talk to his girl. Not manly at all.
——————————————————————————
Valentine’s Day
During lunch, Kirishima has finally decided to speak to Bakugou about this whole thing. He hasn’t been getting any updates since their time in the gym, so when it was just him and his best friend having lunch together, he went for it.
“Man what the hell is going on with you and Y/N? I’ve noticed you’ve been avoiding her like crazy,” Kirishima said while stuffing his face, nervous about the answer. “I was right all along.” The blonde sadly spoke. “She’s been cheating on me since the start of our entire relationship. And with that baggy eyed freak from 1-B.”
Kirishima couldnt believe what he was hearing. He almost choked on his food. Y/N was actually cheating. I guess people don’t know people as well as he thought. “.....wow...I’m sorry man.” The red haired friend said. He was at a lost for words and didn’t know what else to say. *sigh* “don’t be. It all goes down tonight.” Bakugou said with a sad smile. “What do you mean?” His friend asked. The blonde looked at him right in his red eyes. “I’m breaking her heart tonight, on the one day of the year dedicated to love.”
Meanwhile
Instead of going to lunch, Y/N spent her time finishing up Katsuki’s surprise in his room. Yeah, he’s been having a bad past few days so why not bring him a smile with these amazing gifts on the day of love. Although Y/N didn’t really feel the love today (due to Katsuki again being so distant and ignoring her “good morning blasty💥💗!” And “Happy Valentine’s Day my love♥️!” Texts) she was determined to make sure Katsuki knew just exactly how much she loved him. She was almost done setting up in his room. Rose petals on the bed, Candles everywhere, 4 different gifts including his new support item made by you, his favorite meal is going to be set here on his table, and you and him together spending every loving second with each other. Y/N didn’t realize that because of her setup, she missed the entire rest of the day. “Meh, so worth it when I see the look on Suki’s face.” Tonight is going to be perfect.....or so you thought.
You didn’t expect to find Katsuki in your room, sitting on the edge of you bed waiting for you with his head hanging low and his shoulders slumped.
*maybe he has a surprise for me....? Yea that has to be it!* Y/N happily thought as she closed the door.
“Suki!! Happy Valentine’s Day!” Y/N said with all the love in her heart as she ran and jumped on the boy for a hug. But Bakugou didn’t say anything. He didn’t move. He just glanced back up at her, giving her this cold stare. Y/N was too busy professing her undying love for her boyfriend to even notice his scary silence. “Suki I’m really glad it’s you who I have in my life,” the love sicken girl bashfully spoke while looking at the ground. “You make me so happy and I feel so blessed being able to spend my life with you in it. I really hope you know just how much I care and lov-“ Bakugou couldn’t listen to this bullshit anymore. He pushed Y/N off of him just before she could say those 3 words that would get him to break.
“Hey! Suki? Why would you do that?!” Y/N exclaimed while standing back up. “I hate you.” The blonde spoke coldly. As those words left his mouth, Y/N heart and world were falling apart. Her eyes went wide open and her jaw slightly dropped. As she was about to say something else, Katsuki cut her off with “I’m breaking up with your dumbass. Right here. Right now!” Bakugou yelled. Y/N was in shock. She felt hurt, pain, she was just feeling so broken.
As tears filled her eyes, she asked “w-why?” as she tried to reach out to him. “Why? WHY?!” Bakugou screamed as he stood up above her slapping her hand away. “THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN WHY, Y/N. YOU’RE A FUCKING CHEATER, THATS WHY!” The blonde yelled in her face. Y/N couldn’t believe it. He thought she was cheating? Why would she even do that? She already has the best person in the world for her so why? “DONT EVEN GIVE ME THAT “it didn’t mean anything, Suki!” BULLSHIT. I DONT GIVE A FUCK, CUZ YOU’VE BEEN CHEATING ON ME AND PLAYING ME FOR A DAMN FOOL THIS ENTIRE FUCKING TIME!” Bakugou went on as his voice began to crack while tears flowed down his porcelain face. “YOU LIED TO ME. I GAVE YOU MY ENTIRE BEING AND YOU FUCKING LIED. YOU DUMB FUCKING BITCH, I CANT BELIEVE I EVER LOVED A SORRY EXCUSE OF A PERSON LIKE YOU. I HATE YOU SO DAMN MUCH, I DONT EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK I SAW IN YOU!” Y/N’s heart hit the ground. No actually, it went 6 ft under because after all that he’s said, her heart is dead. Broken. In agony. “Suki I-“ “DONT FUCKING CALL ME THAT L/N.” Hearing him refer to her with her family name hit so hard. “KATSUKI PLEASE! I DIDNT DO ANYTHING I SWEA-“ as Y/N tried to reach out to him, he interrupted her again and pushed her hand away. “I SAID DONT CALL ME THAT!”
The blonde yelled, except this time....he didn’t only yell. The burning scent of smoke came into his nose and the loud explosion could be heard throughout the building. The product of what he just did came to him. He just attacked the love of his life. As much as Y/N hurt him, Katsuki still loved her with his everything. And the fact that he subconsciously attacked her broke him even more. Y/N’s screams of pain reached his ears, as he looked down and saw his precious teddy bear with a burned arm and fat tears on her face, crying in pain.
Bakugou ran down to her level to try and help her. “Y/N! Hey, hey teddy bear look I’m so-“ Y/N pushed him away before he could continue. “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU BAKUGOU?!” Ouch. His family name felt like poison coming from your tongue. “Princess, I’m sorry I didn’t-“ “SHUT UP AND LET ME SPEAK FOR ONCE YOU FUCKING IDIOT!” Y/N screamed as she stood up to face him. “I DIDNT FUCKING CHEAT ON YOU. WHY THE HELL WOULD I DO THAT WHEN YOU’RE THE BEST DAMN THING THATS EVER HAPPENED TO ME?!..ah!” Y/N was cut off by the stinging of her wound, and Bakugou couldn’t do anything but stare. Y/N grabbed onto her wound before continuing. “I love you Bakugou. I wouldn’t even dream about doing wrong by you. I thought I was a good girlfriend or at least a good person-“ Bakugou quickly interrupted “No! Y/N you are, I just-“ “If I am then what the hell made you even think of me so lowly? What the hell did I do to make you question my loyalty? What the hell did I do that was worthy of you burning my fucking arm?!” Y/N cried out.
Silence fell upon the room. It felt like hours before anybody said anything. Both people had heavy tears in their face now. One crying because he realized he was an idiot and harmed the girl who did nothing wrong, and One crying because she did nothing wrong but ended up being a villain in her loved one’s life. Y/N broke the silence with a scoff.
“You know what Suki?” Y/N said looking him in the eyes. “Yes teddy bear?” Bakugou quickly replied with wide, desperate eyes upon hearing the loving nickname, thinking they would move on from this horrible incident. “Get the fuck out.” Y/N said in a low voice. Bakugou was shocked. He knew he fucked up horribly but after realizing the truth, he can’t leave you! He loves you too damn much for that! “What? Y/N please listen to me, I’m sor-“ “I DONT GIVE A FUCK! Leave..please.” The sad girl cried. Bakugou grabbed onto her shoulders begging her to not end this. “Y/N please! Please princess! I’m so fucking sorry! I’m an idiot, I know, and I definitely don’t deserve you but please I can’t lose you.” Bakugou said with tears falling down his face. “Please don’t do this to us. Please don’t do this to me, I’m BEGGING YOU.” “Bakugou-“ The sad boy cut you off, shaking his head, “ NO ITS SUKI. YOUR SUKI. YOUR KATSUKI.......please teddy bear I need you.......h-here let me help yo-”
You harshly pushed the boy off of you and as he tried to desperately go back to you, you used your quirk to keep him at bay. “Bakugou Katsuki. I’m leaving this room since you won’t, and I won’t come back until I know you’re out of my room.” Y/N began as she looked at him with cold, sad eyes. “From now on, you won’t have to worry about this bitch because I’ll stay out of your life, I swear. Don’t look at me, don’t touch me, DONT EVEN TALK TO ME. Just leave me alone....we’re done.” And with that Y/N ran out of her room, and out of the building, needing to get away from the place for a little bit. She could deal with her wound later. She just needed to get away. Bakugou just stood there in sadness and shock. As much as he wanted to run after you, he figured he’d give you a little breather. You guys could fix things in the morning...right?
Bakugou waited an hour in your room waiting for you, but you were right. You really weren’t coming back until he left your private area. So that’s what he did. With a heavy heart, he picked himself up and dragged his feet back to his dorm. He looked like a mess. He knew he did. Messy hair, red swollen eyes, dry lips. His entire body screamed heartbroken. When he open the door, instant regret and love hit him at once. His room was covered with rose petals and flowers, there were candles everywhere, heart shaped balloons all around, he had 4 different boxes of gifts, and two plates of extra spicy curry was set on his table, obviously cold now. What caught his eye was that one of the gift boxes had a note attached to it. With tears in his eyes, he read it.
Hey Suki! It’s Valentine’s Day! I love you to the moon and back and so much more. There’s no words that are able to describe the way I feel about you. You drive me insane in all the right ways and I love it! Lol. I hope you like your Valentine’s Day surprise. I’ve been working for weeks on it, so I’m sorry if I’ve been a little distracted. I know I’ve been kinda absent these past few days but I promise I’ll make it up to you love! Hopefully I can start with this gift that I’ve been working on. Enjoy your brand new grenade silencer! Made it myself just for you. There’s nothing else in the world like this. I love you Bakugou Katsuki!
(P.S. If Shinsou from 1-B gives you shit about it, it’s because I made him drag his ass everywhere to look for a missing part so I wouldn’t have to leave you so much)
XOXO, Your forever teddy bear <3
As he quickly opened the gift, he saw it. A silencer that would attach to his gauntlets to make the sound quieter and the blast even more powerful. It was incredible. You are incredible. He only ever mentioned the sound of his blasts once, and you listened and you fixed it.
Bakugou shook as tears began to fall onto the paper. He couldn’t believe it. Everything started coming together now. The reason you were so distracted was because you were setting this up for him. You were always on the phone because you were assembling pieces and ordering gifts for him. You weren’t cheating on him with Shinsou. You were making sure he could find something that you needed for him. Y/N L/N was truly the best girlfriend in the world. Scratch that, she is the best girlfriend in the world. No scratch that too, she’s just the best, period. And Bakugou’s idiotic self ruined everything for him. All because he couldn’t have a little faith in his teddy bear. As Katsuki cried and cried, he set everything aside.
He took the petals off his bed. He didn’t deserve it. He blew out the candles around his room. He didn’t deserve it. He popped the balloons, and ignored the food. He laid in bed with more tears than ever, and looked at the ceiling. He finally turned to his side to fall asleep, but not before grabbing the picture on his bedside nightstand. A picture of you and him. He remembers that picture oh so clearly. It was his birthday, and while he didn’t want to celebrate, you did everything in your power to make it the best one yet. And you did just that. Bakugou hugged that picture so tight, because he didn’t have you in his arms tonight. He didn’t think he would ever have you in his arms again. So Bakugou Katsuki continued to cry until he was asleep, escaping from the reality of him losing his love, his teddy bear, his princess, and his Y/N.
Bakugou Katsuki never lost, no. He’s always been ahead, always number one, always the best. He always won and achieved and nothing ever stopped him. Except this time, the only thing that stopped him and caused him to lose, was himself. He lost. He lost his everything. His world, his rock, his heart, his Y/N. He’s lost without her in his life, and at this point he thinks he’s lost at life. There was nothing that could fix him unless it was you coming back to him.
Bakugou Katsuki? He’s lost.
A/N: HOLY SHIT! That was my very first writing piece and it was just a Drabble of a thought I’ve been having. Sorry if it’s a little off and weird, I’m still new to writing but hopefully I’ll get better. This was NOT spell checked so my apologies for any mistakes. I hope you enjoyed reading this! Thx for the love!
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the-original-skipps · 3 years
Text
Fluffy Alphabet A-Z
Sano Manjiro aka Mikey
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Note: Thank you so much for 100+ followers. I wouldn't have been able to get his far without your support. I'm super overjoyed and glad that you guys take the time to read my writing. I love you all very much as promised I hope you enjoy the fluffy alphabet! 💗
A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?
> Mikey likes to go for rides on his CB205T and he likes to bring you along. He just loves the feeling of the wind passing and your presence behind him. Maybe sharing some snacks while you both watch the sunset or the starry night sky, talking about random things. He just generally likes being around you even if you're both just sitting in silence.
B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?
> He admires your determination and strong will. Since Mikey is mentally weak, he admires those traits in other people. No matter what you'd always be there to scold him or comfort him. It reminds him of his older brother.
C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?
> Mikey instantly knows if you're feeling down, he just senses it. He'll bring you somewhere where they could both be alone maybe a park or he'll drive somewhere and sit you down. Mikey won't force you to tell him what's wrong but if you do he'll be listening intently. He's not the best at comforting people but makes sure to let you know that he's here for you.
D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?
> Now this is a hard topic to answer. Mikey has pictured a future with his s/o, living in peace after all the rush during his teenage years. However, he doesn't see it happening because he knows it's best if he keeps his s/o away from him in the future.
E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?
> I'd say he's both but mostly on the passive side. He lets you take the lead since he doesn't know much about being in a relationship. He'll be given advice and teased by his close friends but he'll keep their words in mind.
F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?
> Mikey is pretty stubborn and doesn't like losing. If it's a petty harmless arguement, if he's wrong then he'll muttering an apology to you and completely forget about it. It's difficult to get into a serious argument with him unless it's something concerning him or Toman. Say the things he needs to hear even if himself doesn't agree with you. Then he'll leave to give himself space and think about things. Be patient with him because eventually he'll come around.
G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?
> Mikey is very grateful for you being by his side even though he thinks he doesn't deserve it. He appreciates every gesture you do for him from the big things and to the little things such as making him lunch or fixing his hair or just being by his side when he feels he's losing himself.
H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?
> Mikey doesn't hide things, if you ask him something he will directly answer you. He has no trouble talking about a past event since it already happened. Even though he doesn't want you getting involved with Toman, he still tells you about how they're doing or what they're up to. The only things he wouldn't share are his true feelings and his dark impulsivities since he doesn't want to scare you.
I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?
> Just by being by Mikey's side you are a positive influence on him. It will take a long time but little by little he tries to open up about his true feelings and tries to rely on you more. Everytime you sense he's distancing himself, you would have to drag him back and knock some sense into him.
J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?
> Mikey is definitely the type to get jealous easily and his childish tendencies tend to come out. If he sees you getting too friendly with someone he'll keep staring until he's had enough and say "(Y/N) is mine, hmph!" With a cute pout on his face. Be sure to coddle him afterwards because he might give you the silent treatment.
K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?
> Mikey has no experience whatsoever. He has no idea how kisses work. It'll be super rare to get a kiss from Mikey since he's not used to being affectionate. If you're lucky he'll peck you on your cheek or kiss your hands occasionally. Your first kiss with him wasn't planned. Both of you were alone and you were just admiring him as he talked and pressed a light kiss on his lips. He was instantly shocked by what you did as he traces over his lips with his fingers but inside he's feeling all warm. He never knew kisses from you would have this kind of affect on him.
L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?
> It took long time for Mikey to realize that what he felt towards you was more than just friendship. He confessed this to Draken and he replied "huh, obviously you like them you idiot. Hurry up and go tell them." In which Mikey replies by telling Draken to do the same for Emma. It happened when he came to pick you up from school one day on his motorcycle and brought you to the riverside. "I finally understand what I feel, (Y/N). I like you... You don't have to give me an answer right away, I'll wait however long it takes..."
M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?
> Another hard topic to answer. When Mikey fell for you he fell hard. As much as he wants to spend the rest of his life in peace with you, it won't happen. That is until he goes through "certain changes" and let's say he did. You'll be riding with him on his motorcycle on Christmas until he stops at a certain place. He'll start talking about his past and the times you've spent together. Then talking about how much he appreciates you and thanks you then pops the question. The wedding will be small and privately held with only people close to him and you are invited.
N icknames - What do they call their s/o?
> It is known that Mikey gives nicknames to those who are close to him. It depends on what your first name is. He'll most likely you use the first syllable of your name plus -chin, -cchi or -chy. Only when he's serious will he use your real name.
O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?
> Honestly, it can be really hard to tell unless you really observe Mikey. You would notice he stares at you longer, or everytime your name pops up in a conversation he's interested. Draken is definitely the first the notice this change in Mikey and teases him for it, while Mikey denys it. The others will slowly start to notice this too. Especially, when he bought an extra taiyaki and gave it to you. Takemichy's jaw dropped at the scene.
P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?
> Mikey won't be announcing to everyone that he has an s/o. However, if someone asks he'll answer honestly. I wouldn't use the word "brag" but he will say nice about you to others. For Mikey, intimate gestures such as kissing are only between the two of you. If someone catches the both of you, Mikey wouldn't be pleased.
Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.
> You wouldn't have to worry about anyone trying to flirt with you or trying to hurt you not when Mikey's around. Mikey cares deeply about you and would give his life to protect you. You wouldn't have to worry about other people trying to flirt with Mikey either since you already have his heart, he'll simple brush them off. He's loyal.
R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?
> As I have mentioned earlier, Mikey has no experience with relationships. You would have to teach him things. Still there will be moments that might seem simple to others but to you, you know it's a way Mikey shows his love for you. For example, draping his jacket over your shoulders or buying an extra snack so you could have some too. If he's not busy with Toman matters, he would want to spend his time with you.
S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?
> Mikey would genuinely support your dreams and passions, telling you to never give up on them. He believes in you with his whole heart, and he knows you would be able to make your goals come true.
T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?
> He would like to try things he never experienced before with you, like taking pictures at the photo booth or going shopping for matching keychains. That being said, what Mikey likes the most is the constant reassurance that you're here for him. Routines like going riding on his motorcycle or just talking with you, it what he like most. He's scared that one day you'd leave him so these mundane routines assures him.
U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?
> You would think Mikey is the forgetful type but he actually pays attention to things. He'll notice you eyeing a certain item in a store or if you're lying to him. He genuinely cares about you and would like to know everything about you, even the shameful parts. Mikey has a hard time with emotions, he may not fully understand your troubles but he'll assure you that he'll be there for you.
V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?
> For Mikey to actually want to establish a relationship with someone. It means he sees you as an important person in his life. However, certain things would have to come before you such as his family and Toman. It is something you would have to understand when dating Mikey.
W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.
> Whenever he looks like he's spacing off during Toman meetings while he is paying attention to what's happening his mind can't help but wander towards you. About what you're currently doing or if you're at home safely. Before he starts the engine of his bike, or has nothing to do he fiddles with the keychain on his keys. It's the matching keychain you both have.
X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?
> Mikey is not known to be the most showy when it comes to showing his affections. It's the little things he does for only you, that shows how much he cares about you. Mikey secretly likes the affection you give him even if he denies it. It surprises him everytime you hug him or kiss him but he never stops you or tells you to stop. Just don't do it in front of Toman. Even if he doesn't want to, cuddle him as the big spoon and it'll make him really happy. Since he's so used to keeping a strong facade, cuddling with you gives him the impression that with you maybe he doesn't have to do that.
Y earning - How will they cope when they're missing their partner?
> Mikey will still act as the strong charismatic leader of Toman, where nothing fazes him. He won't outwardly show that he misses you but you can tell by the way he fiddles with his matching keychain or stares off into the distance that he misses you. He might even unconsciously blurt a quiet "I miss (Y/N)...."
Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?
> Mikey is willing to give his life away to protect you. Just you being with him is dangerous enough who knows who might be out to get him and easiest way they can do that is by getting you. If your safely is at risk even he likes you he would have to break up with you, keep you away from the danger. Because he utmostly cares about your well being and if anything happens to you, it will destroy him.
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hiraethenthusiast · 3 years
Text
"I love you most."| t.h.
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pairing: actor!tom x reader
warnings: floof attack.
synopsis: tom gives you the best wedding you could've gotten. he's in love with you madly, that's what he says.
a/n: guess who wants this? i do. i absolutely adore a loving husband no matter what, and i adore heartfelt gifts even more! i hope you all like this fic, this one's really close to me! tpwk everyone!
listen to clinton kane's i guess i'm in love
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“So do you, Y/N Y/L/N take Tom as your lawfully wedded husband?” The priest asks you while you and Tom look at him with impatience in your eyes.
“I do.” You say, making everyone cheer and making Tom smile.
“And do you Tom Ho-” “I do!” He shouts before the priest could even complete his sentence, making everyone at the altar erupt into laughs.
“Let him finish bubba” You laugh along, signalling the priest to go on when Tom mutters a small ‘sorry’ to him.
“Do you, Tom Holland, take Y/N Y/L/N as your lawfully wedded wife?” He asks again, while Tom looks at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes.
“I do.” And everyone cheers once again, and you gently squeeze his hand.
“So I shall now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” The priest says lastly before getting off the stage and as if on queue, Tom sweeps you under his arms and holds your waist before pressing his lips to yours. The moment was wholeheartedly content, his and your parents, both with tears in their eyes, even Paddy and Harry shed a few, because the moment was so pure to just not cry at. Tom kisses you as if he was the luckiest man on Earth, like he had achieved something which he thought he could never. He pulls back to look at you beaming with the biggest smile he’s seen on you in years, and smiles to himself once again.
This was the best day of both of your lives till now, and there was no doubt about it.
After 4 years of being together, Tom finally proposed to you, and then forgot where he kept the ring, but you couldn’t care less because the man you were in love with was now, going to be a forever favourite in your lives. And today, he was now your husband from your fiance, and you couldn’t be anymore happier.
You both settle down after roaming from one place to another greeting every guest that had attended your wedding, finally for a drink and some food. Harrison sits right behind you, completing the duties of best man with all his will, and you smile at him. The twins and Paddy come in a bit later, but your eyes are looking for someone else. Where’s Tom? Your question was answered when you hear the clinking of a glass, just to find your handsome husband there.
“May I have your attention please?” He looks directly at you and you blow him a kiss, him pretending to catch it making everyone laugh. Actors.
“Thank you all for attending and being a part of our very wonderful day, I swear you guys are our favourite people” He says while chuckling.
“Today is the day I married my wonderful and stunning lover, Y/N and in recognition of that, I decided to give you the best gift of this evening.” He says, making you wonder what he got for you.
“I remember when Y/N once told me that she always loves heartfelt and handmade gifts filled with love more than people buying her the gift of her choice. She likes the element of surprise, as she likes to say. So Y/N my darling, I thought you might notice and scold me for it but you didn’t, not even once in this 4 year old relationship, and trust me this is going to shock you. I’ve managed to record every important and goofy moment of our lives, from falling on a staircase to the time I proposed to you, I have it all. I’ve compiled them into one sweet video for you, while your favourite singer of them all, Mr. Clinton Kane sings a song for us! Please give him a huge round of applause!” You jerk your head to the place where Clinton enters from, and he waves at you making you wave instinctively as well.
You look back again towards Tom, who was smiling sweetly at your little fangirl moment and continues.
“I’d also like to thank Harrison and Harry for helping me edit this video, because I’m literally so dumb without anyone of these four with me.”
“Can you put the lights out and start the video please?” He asks one of the workers there at the venue, and jogs up to sit down beside you, giving you a small peck while you take a hold of his hand.
And on queue, the lights are dimmed and the video starts to play. You can hear the faint strumming of the guitar that Clinton is currently playing, but you aren’t able to identify the song just yet. You look ahead towards the screen, and your eyes light up when you see Tom dressed up in his wedding tuxedo, you finally realising that this bit was filmed just a few hours ago.
“Hello my lovely wife! Well, I’m filming this part before the ceremony starts but I think I’m pretty certain on showing you this video after we’re married. This was...boring. Anyways, I hope you enjoy the video my love, and don’t hit me when we get home! I love you so so so much, enjoy!” He says before shutting off his camera, while everyone laughs at his goofiness and you glare at him playfully. The video rolls again and you look forward, but suddenly realise the song. It’s ‘I Guess I’m In Love’, you say to yourself. Tom had proposed to you after a few days when the song came out, and somehow on the night of him proposing, this song was played. You labelled it ‘our song’ and he happily obliged. 
“Haz hold the camera correctly for god's sake...” You hear your husband’s voice and move your head towards the screen, smiling brightly.
“Oh I’m obsessed. With the way your head is laying on my chest.” Clinton starts, immediately soothed by the presence of your lover and the melody in your ears.
“I am holding the camera nicely mate bugger off! Nikki taught me well!” Harrison says in the background making everyone giggle.
“She’s coming shut up” 
“What’s this Tom?” You ask him, as he looks at you like a kid in love.
“Y/N”
“Tom” You say in the same manner, feeling anxious by the second.
“So we’ve been dating for 4 years and trust me those have been the most beautiful four years of my life. I know this is so out of the blue, but Y/N Y/L/N, will you do the favour of marrying the person who loves you immensely? A.k.a. Tom?" He says and you laugh. You hold on for a few seconds, looking in his eyes which were filled with desperation.
"Yes" You say and his face lights up like a Christmas tree. He can't stop beaming and searches for the ring in his pocket, only to find out that he didn't have it.
"Oh I'm a mess. When I overthink the little things in my head."
"I have the ring I promise." He says, moving frantically.
"Tom-"
"I swear I kept the ring in my pocket-"
"Tom-"
"How can I be this stupid you probably don't want to marry me anymore-"
"TOM!" He jerks his head towards you as you shout his name.
"It's okay. I just want you right now." You say and he immediately hugs you, the tightest of them all.
The clip ends and you knew the tears were coming very soon, Tom senses the action and rubs your knuckles., giving you a hearty smile.
The second clip rolls in soon, your eyes brightening almost instantly.
"You seem to always help me catch my breath. But then I lose it again, when I look at you, that's the end."
"Why the hell are we on the top of the Eiffel Tower? And why do you want your phone to crash?" You ask him, while he struggles to make a video with his phone while the winds roar at the top of the monument.
"Because I want to remember this moment!" He shouts, making you smile even more.
"My goof"
"Your goof"
"You're lucky I love you"
"I wouldn't have it any other way darling" He says and gives you a quick peck on the lips, this moment too pure to realise.
"Why do I get so nervous when I look into your eyes? And butterflies can't stop me falling for you."
"Now we may invite, a very handsome young lad, who happens to be Spiderman, Mr. Tom Holland!" Harry shouts in the video, while you all pretended to have a grand gala when you couldn't attend Tom's premiere.
He walks in wearing a black tuxedo, his shirt buttons open from the top, looking dashing.
"Thank you for inviting Harold, but please, call the star of today's night." Tom says, making everyone groan about how in love he was with you.
"Patience Thomas. Now may I present, the queen of today's night, Ms. Y/N Y/L/N!" Everyone applauds as you walk down the stairs as you hear your name. You reach the door wearing a red and black dress, the clothing complementing your body more than ever. Everyone seems to keep clapping but your attention is towards that one dummy, who's standing like he's seen a ghost.
"..Oh wow." He's speechless, and everyone knows it. You blush at your boyfriend's gesture and nudge him in the shoulder, as a signal to stop staring.
"I hope you all understand that I scored a jackpot, thank you" He sees and everybody laughs.
You laugh along with the other guests, remembering the faint memory from over two years back. This was one of the most fun nights you've had with Tom. While you laugh at the clip, all Tom can do is stare at you in awe. How did he get so lucky, he thinks. He watches how your face glows when you see someone happy on the screen. He truly was blessed.
"And darling this is more than anything I've felt before. You're everything that I want, but I didn't think I'd find. Someone who was worth the wait of all the years of my heartbreak. But I know now I've found the one I love."
"Please don't go" You sniffle on Tom's shoulder, asking him to stay one last time before his flight leaves for Atlanta.
"If it was in my hands darling I'd never leave your side." He says, trying to hold back tears.
"It's okay, I understand." You say, pulling back and clearing your throat.
"Awh Y/N please don't cry." Tom tries to persuade his emotions by telling you to stop, but a tear falls down his cheeks in an instant.
"I'm sorry." You say, chuckling lightly, making Tom chuckle too.
"I'll be back before you know it."
"I know you will be"
"Please board the flight for Atlanta which leaves at 1330 hours" The flight attendant announces, and you know it's time to let him go.
"Come back home to me soon okay?" You say, wiping your tears.
"As soon as possible"
"I love you" He says.
"I love you more."
"I love you most." You can't argue with that now.
"Bye bubba" You say, giving him one last kiss, a very long one indeed, that left you both searching for oxygen.
"Bye darling" And he leaves to board his flight. You look in the same direction until he disappears and you turn around.
"Harrison, are you crying?"
"No-" He sniffles and you laugh.
You knew you were going to cry as soon as you saw the location. This was one of the hardest moments of your life, letting your lover go away from you for so long, and you weren't ready for that. You wiped your tears while Tom rubbed your hand with one of his, the other cleaning his tear stained face. You look back to see Harrison crying once again, and you laugh a bit at him before giving him your hand for comfort. He really was the best man. You blow a kiss to your family and Tom's, who were currently high on emotions. Even the brothers had tears in their eyes. You really did get the best family.
"And I love the way. You can never find the right things to say. And you can't sit still an hour in the day. I'm so in love, let's run away because us is enough."
The rest of the video were some clips of you and Tom being goofy and so in love, which were a delight to watch. The song played in the background, adding its own special touch, which was necessary to bind this moment together. All these moments which Tom managed to shoot secretly were a lifelong reminder of how much your person loved you. He loved you.
And that is all you need.
The video gets over and Tom looks at you with puppy eyes.
"So, how was it?"
"You're the reason my makeup is ruined and I have mascara stains" You say, laughing while crying.
"That good, huh?"
"That good." You say and he pulls you in for a hug and kisses your forehead.
"I love you bubba"
"I love you more" He says, kissing your cheek.
"I love you most." 
He couldn't argue with that.
"But I know now I've found the one I love."
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tagging some friends who'd like to read!
@evanssimpybaby @hollandsmushroom @tomsoxytocin @scarletspideyy @leafy-holland @t-lostinworlds
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babymetaldoll · 4 years
Text
So happy together (Spencer Reid / Reader)
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Summary: Spencer bumps into an old annoying classmate, who brags about his perfect family, and Reader decides to pretend to be Spencer’s wife to shut him up.   
Warnings: As fluffy as you can get 
Word count: 2,3K
Part II
Masterlist 
It wasn’t strange that Spencer and (Y/N) spent their free time together when they weren’t on a case. Their job at the BAU left them just a few weekends off, and though they were all day on each other’s faces at work, they loved going out whenever the opportunity arose. 
It might have been related to the fact they were best friends. 
Also to the fact they were in love, but neither of them had still said a word about it. 
Years had passed. Years. Morgan and Penelope were going nuts waiting for them to confess their feelings, but though they had literally pushed them together - once they were “accidentally” locked in a supply closet of the BAU for two hours- nothing had happened yet. 
Even Hotch was annoyed. He was happy Spencer had someone he loved around him, but all Aaron wanted to tell him was: 
- “You have to act on your feelings before it’s too late, ‘cos you never know what will happen tomorrow, not just in this job, but in life. Take what makes you happy and keep it close”. 
Of course, the day he tried to talk to Reid, all Hotch managed to say was: “Tell (Y/N) wheels up in thirty” and that was it, but he was planning on giving the kid a speech about love, as soon as he got a chance. 
Then again, when did he have time to do anything besides work? 
It was Saturday, and Spencer was taking a calm walk in a park with (Y/N). She had promised Mrs. Sanders from 307B she was going to take Lizzy - her five years old corgi - out to play for a while, ‘cos it was making the old woman insane. Mrs. Sanders was the only neighbor (Y/N) actually talked to…. mostly ‘cos she was never long enough in her house to meet the rest of them. (Y/N) took her dog for walks as often as she could, and the old lady always baked her brownies and cookies for her “and her boyfriend”
- “Your boyfriend is too skinny, take him these and tell him you made them for him, men love when a woman cooks for them”- the old lady smiled and gave (Y/N) a tray with freshly made cookies- “And tell him to cut his hair, he looks scruffy”.
(Y/N) never told her otherwise, a part of her loved the idea of Spencer being her boyfriend…. and besides, it would be rude to break an old woman’s heart. Right? 
- “Do you want an ice cream?”- Reid asked her and took her from her thoughts. 
- “Yes! I need sugar ‘cos I’m so tired I’m gonna fall asleep standing here”- Lizzy barked at them and left her ball on the ground- “You on the other hand, never get tired, do you?”- the young woman threw the ball.
- “Go fetch, baby!!”
Spencer walked to the ice cream truck and got her a chocolate chip cookie dough cone - he didn’t even need to ask- and a mint chocolate chip for himself. He stared at her playing with Lizzy and for a second, he imagined she was actually his girlfriend, and they were spending their day off together, walking their dog, eating ice cream, holding hands. It was perfect in his mind. 
- “Here”- he gave her her cone and smiled. (Y/N) was about to thank him when a stranger’s voice stopped her. 
- “Spencer!! long time no see! how are you?”- a man stood next to them, he was maybe five years older than them, tall, good looking, he was carrying a little girl in his arms, and holding a woman’s hand tight. She was pregnant and smiling happily. It was the portrait of a perfect family. 
- “Carl, hey, hello, how are you?”- Reid was surprised to see him, it had been years since he had seen his old classmate, and he could have lived a long happy life if he hadn’t seen him again. 
Carl wasn’t really nice. He wasn’t mean, or a bully, or anything like that. He was just… an asshole sometimes. He was always bragging about everything he had: grades, cars, girls, anything you might think of. Spencer always thought it was because he needed to be validated over and over again as an alfa male, which wasn’t really his problem. But still, after hearing him for years when he was younger, Reid had enough of him. 
- “It’s so weird to find you here, I thought you would still have your nose buried in books like you always did on weekends!”- Carl laughed at his own joke, and Reid just nodded, with an awkward smile. 
- “No, I… sometimes I go out now”- that was all he managed to say
- “This is my wife, Andrea, and our little angel, Anna, she is three… and Carl Jr is on his way”
- “Nice to meet you”- Spencer waved and couldn’t even introduce (Y/N), ‘cos Carl continued talking. 
- “Can you believe I got married? I always said I was never going to settle down and here I am! with a happy family! you should come and visit us! We just bought this fantastic house outside town, with a big yard and lots of space for the kids to run and play!”
(Y/N) stared at Carl and bit her tongue. She had heard about him a lot in the last few years. Spencer told her all about the classmate who kept telling him about the dates he had with the girls he wanted to ask out. And all the fun he had at the parties he wasn’t invited to. And how he managed to always make him feel smaller, though he didn’t actually mean to. Sometimes people can’t help being assholes. 
- “And who is your friend?”- the assumption (Y/N) was his friend and not his girlfriend (although it was actually accurate, that was another problem) made Reid’s blood boil. Why couldn’t he have a pretty girlfriend too? 
- “Hi! I’m (Y/N), Spencer’s wife”- she waved and smiled- “Sorry I can’t shake your hand”- she added and showed them the dog toy she was holding, and the ice cream cone.
- “Come here Lizzy! come here!”- the dog sat next to her and (Y/N) pet her sweetly. 
- “Wife! man! I never thought you had it in you”- Carl didn’t realize he was an ass, he didn’t mean to, but that didn’t stop him.  
Spencer just smiled, and in what seemed to be the boldest move he had ever made, he wrapped an arm around (Y/N)’s waist and moved her a little closer to him. 
- “Yes, we’ve been married for two years already”- she added, resting her head against his arm, feeling her stomach tighten. Spencer’s perfume was all around her, and she loved it. Besides, the fact he was now holding her close was killing her. Literally, she could feel she was about to have a heart attack, and it was completely worth it. It took her a few seconds to realize her ice cream was melting in her hands. 
- “Shit!”- she jumped and moved from her “husband” to clean herself. 
- “Here”- Carl’s wife handed her some baby wipes and looked at her hands for a second- “Did you lose your ring?”- shit, Andrea was nosy and annoying, just like her hubby.
- “I usually won’t wear it playing with the dog, or at work”- lies came out of (Y/N)’s lips as easy as breathing- “You know… we are both FBI, and you don’t know when someone might actually take advantage of any kind of information they have about you”
- “FBI? you?”- Spencer looked at Carl and sighed. Right, he wasn’t done teasing him yet. 
- “Yes, I’ve been working at the BAU for the last couple of years, profiling serial killers”- Reid made it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, and (Y/N) decided it was time to brag a little. 
- “Honey, don’t be so modest, you are the best profiler, we are the only team with a Doctor in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering”- and Reid blushed- “Besides, you joined the FBI when you were 22 years old”- (Y/N) smiled and looked at Carl- “Did you know he is the youngest SSA the bureau had ever have? there was no psychological exam or test the FBI could put in front of him he could not ace inside of an hour”  
Carl looked at Reid and nodded, trying to find something to say. 
- “That’s great, I’ve got my own law firm by the way, in case you ever get in trouble”- he joked and looked at (Y/N)- “Or in case you want to divorce him ‘cos he ignores you over books”
- “I could never! did you know he has saved around 352 lives in the last two years? he actually got the FBI Medal for Meritorious Achievement a few months ago… I am so proud”- (Y/N) leaned in and kissed Spencer’s cheek. He looked at her blushing and just smiled. 
- “You look adorable”- Andrea finally said- “It’s like you just started dating!” 
- “Well, we have to go”- Carl didn’t manage being overshadowed very well- “It was very nice to see you, Spencer” 
- “Same! take care, nice to meet you, Andrea”- Reid waved and smiled. (Y/N) did the same and kept eating her ice cream. 
- “I hate him”- she whispered as soon as they were far enough not to listen- “I’m so glad we didn’t invite them to our wedding”- Reid laughed and shook his head
- “You didn’t have to do that”
- “Nah, I wanted to”- she really did- “He was being a jerk, just like you told me he was” 
- “He doesn’t mean to… I think” 
- “Well, he got what he deserved”- (Y/N) felt Spencer’s eyes on her, looking at her in adoration. 
- “Thank you, buttercup”- and she giggled
- “You are very welcome, honey bunny…”- and the silence seemed to last for ages until Lizzy started barking. 
(Y/N) smiled and looked away from him, knowing she was blushing. She really loved that nickname, and he didn’t call her by it as often as she would like. She grabbed the dog toy from the ground and threw it to Lizzy, who ran immediately.
- “Mrs. Sanders made you cookies”- she said after a few minutes- “But she said I had to tell you I baked them for you, ‘cos that what’s girlfriend’s do to get men’s hearts”- Reid’s cheeks were still red, and those words didn’t make it better- “But considering we are already married, I guess I don’t have to do that anymore”. 
They both laughed and then, stayed quiet again. Reid could hear Rossi’s voice yelling in the back of his head “Ask the girl out, for crying out loud”, but he couldn’t even open his mouth, petrified. 
(Y/N) finished her ice cream, watching Lizzy playing with other dogs, and sighed. They were standing side by side, both looking ahead. 
- “We should head back”
- “Doyouwannagooutwithme?”
The slur of words was so fast, not even Spencer understood what he had just said. But (Y/N) did. She stood next to him feeling her knees shaking, as well as her hands. It had happened. It had finally happened. In her head, she was screaming “YES, OF COURSE I WANT TO”, but her lips weren’t moving, and Reid was starting to panic. Maybe Morgan was wrong, and (Y/N) did like him that way. Maybe he had just ruined the best friendship he had ever had. Shit! what had he done. 
- “I mean, I understand if you…”- but she didn’t let him finish 
- “Yes, I do”- that was really all she could process. And he didn’t know what to say next. There was no random fact to kill the silence, they would always have a lot to talk about, but that time they were speechless. 
- “Tomorrow?”- he managed to whisper
- “Ok”- she nodded as the two of them kept looking at Lizzy 
 - “I’ll pick you up for dinner”- Spencer’s voice was so soft he was scared it was going to shake and embarrass him  (he was already embarrassed, but he didn’t want to make it worst). 
- “Sounds good”- (Y/N) slowly turned her head and looked at him, nearly holding her breath. Her best friend finally asked her out. The best friend she had been in love with for years had just asked her out on a date. And all she managed to say was: 
- “So… do you want a cookie?”
- “Sure…”- he nodded and smiled. (Y/N) called Lizzy and put on her leash. Gave Spencer the paper bag with homemade cookies she carried in her purse and smiled.
.
- “Did you know Christmas cookies date back to Medieval Europe?”- and there it was, Spencer’s random fact of the day, just on time to kill the silence when they were about to reach (Y/N)’s apartment. 
- “Really?”
- “Yeah, the traditional Christmas flavors, like cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger, became very popular, and those are exactly the same spices medieval cooks would have used in their cookies ages ago”
- “I love Christmas cookies”
- “I know”- he smiled and looked at her- You bake them all year long 
- “I can’t help it, they are too good”- she giggled and stood outside her building door. They just stared and smiled, Lizzy trying to get (Y/N)’s attention rubbing her head against her leg. 
- “I’ll see you tomorrow then”- Spencer blushed at the hint of their date and (Y/N) nodded
- “See you tomorrow”- and neither of them moved. Lizzy barked again and forced (Y/N) to wave and open the door. Spencer just stood there for a second, staring at the empty space in front of him where (Y/N) was standing a few seconds ago, and suddenly, it all sank in.
- “What the fuck did I just do?” 
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