#it’s the way they see and understand each other that makes me physically ill
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“There you are. There’s my Viktor.”
#referenced that forehead touch scene from pride and prejudice because it’s the vibe i got during act 3 raaahhh#it’s the way they see and understand each other that makes me physically ill#arcane#jayvik#sketch#fanart#myart#procreate#drawing#illustration
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“There you are. There’s my Viktor.”…(Read More)
#referenced that forehead touch scene from pride and prejudice because it’s the vibe i got during act 3 raaahhh#it’s the way they see and understand each other that makes me physically ill#arcane#jayvik#sketch#fanart#myart#procreate#drawing#illustration
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I don't talk about this stuff on here pretty much at all, but a past relationship really broke a ton of bits and pieces of my brain and heart in weird ways (I'm finally thinking about him almost never but the shit he pulled was abusive as hell and still affects me sometimes). Being in love with my current girlfriends for a while felt almost. Painful? Almost like I should be ashamed I can fall so deeply in love with people, and especially how quickly that can happen sometimes too. Thats how it kind of felt. I tend to get overwhelmed with emotions if I'm feeling them very strongly, and that has been extremely embarrassing and also felt almost like I was being a burden to those I love (which love is the main emotion that can 'get dialed up to 11' for me). It IS debilitating in some ways!!! It hasn't gotten bad enough I've been nonverbal in a really really long time but that happened this past week and it was wild to me.
Things are getting better now though! Therapy in the past has helped, and honestly having such patient and understanding partners has made a world of difference ;w;. my wife is someone who was one of my best friends and I had a huge crush on and now I can ask for cuddles and we can nap together and I've fallen so much in love. Her and her presence are literally heaven for me, I don't know if anything has ever made me happier than just laying next to her and feeling her warmth.
Worries of course flare up and I feel like I need to lean on her a lot during those moments, but I don't feel like too much of a burden to her. I love seeing the posts that say stuff like 'Its okay to be a burden' or 'its okay to be annoying' because really truly I think I need to be those things to survive sometimes. I can be 'a lot' and I can be a little bit obsessive and those things aren't inherently bad or evil of me. I just make sure I'm feeling okay during and after and make sure I'm checking in on myself often. I'm a bit of a broken girl, but that doesn't mean I'm not extremely happy and living a life I love. I've written poems and everything about how it feels like it must hurt to love me and my broken jagged edges, but hey, even if it does a little bit, it doesn't mean someone like my girlfriend/wife won't go through a little bit of burden to love me, and I'm more than happy to return all of this and more for her as well if she's ever in need or feels broken ;^;
#Not to be too gay but I wanna build my life with my princess more and more#She's. So good to me and she's so pretty and she's so beautiful and attentive and she listens to me in ways I feel no one else has#She understands me so well!! And I hopefully make her feel the same#But yeah I've been a burden a lot to people due to autism (which I didn't know I had for fucking ages) adhd and physical disabilites#And she feels like she isn't taking care of me which is good because I'd honestly hate that#But she understands me and makes me a better person and that's exactly what I've wanted for forever.#And being demi/aspec is awesome with her since she's aspec too and there's no pressure for sex or sexy times but if we both want it#It can still be super fun!! We gotta figure more of that stuff out if we want but knowing each others kinks (and sharing a good bit) rocks#Idk its so so so so easy to love my wife Maxie#She's so dear to me and we've only been dating for 4 months but they've been 4 months I've felt the most alive and seen#Its so easy to be cringe but free with her too idk#She makes me better and I hope I do the same for her. I don't want either of us to stagnate yknow?#But anyways yeah this is just a big journal entry of some kind I might do these every once and a while#Not to like. Brag??? I guess. Or show my mental illness so much. Its just kind of nice if friends know where I'm at in my life I guess#And idk having outside input on thoughts can be good. If any friends see this and go 'Hey Runa this is real weird maybe tone it down'#I can look at that stuff a bit more#Gonna tag this in a way I can find it and others in the future too#Runa diary logs#But yeah you're not hearing this from me but I wanna be with Maxine for the foreseeable future more than anything.#Gotta get my degree and a good job too and she's ofc not the only person in my life (I have Sara who is so very dear to me too ;w;)#Nor is she the only 'goal' I have either. I wanna make games I wanna make art. I wanna make something that other trans people#And queer people and just minorities in general can look at or play or experience and just go. Life is worth living#I love my life right now and I'm so glad I've made it to my late 20's.#Its only uphill from here :3#Wanna add on when I say she's not the only person in my life I mean that I have so many friends and people I love who love me too :3#♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
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On the False Dragonets of Destiny
Recycled art... Forgive me, I can't physically draw more than I currently am.
Just a little while ago I was looking at some replies to my recent work, and I noticed a nice comment from someone who expressed they enjoyed my comics featuring the false dragonets of destiny, but couldn't really get into them in the books. I am thankful for that comment, but even more thankful for the opportunity to ramble at length about something I kind of wanted to talk about, but couldn't find a plausible excuse for. Until now.
All of this is just my reading of the material, of course. You don't need to agree with me on this.
Content Warning: Some discussion of abuse, trauma, violence. I don't know if it's severe enough to warrant a warning, but better be safe.
General discussion
The false dragonets of destiny, the alternates, or whatever one wants to call them. They enter the story proper in book 4, after having made a few minor cameo appearances before, and serve as a kind of hybrid antagonistic force and pseudo-allies for Starflight during his stay on the Nightwing Isle. During that time, they are very abrasive, stand-offish, uncooperative, and a bit annoying, and I guess that doesn't make them come off very well. But like, in spite of that or maybe partially because of it, I am really fond of these guys, and I'd like to take some time talking them up to you.
One can examine how these guys act and conclude that they are a bunch of dysfunctional screw-ups. And they absolutely are that, don't get me wrong. But one should keep in mind: the majority of the time they are in the spotlight, they are in an extreme, tense, and frighteningly uncertain situation. It's easy to forget how stressful these situations are because the books as a whole really like to gloss over the more frightening kind of subjects on account of being written for young readers. You can't really go deep into themes of abuse, trauma, and depression in a story like that without tripping over some kind of censor on the way, but the implications are there, between the lines for you to find.
Understanding the group
Who are the false dragonets of destiny? They are posited as a mirror image of the true dragonets of destiny, who have all been extensively schooled in matters of education and martial prowess. The first thing we see THIS group do on page is brawl, so one may think they must be trained and capable fighters. Viper and Flame constantly throw around death threats and aggressive quips, so one may think they are hyper-violent and dangerous. They are neither. Nautilus admits the Talons haven't bothered training them at all, they haven't seen real combat, they've likely been deliberately kept away from the war as a whole. Flame doesn't even know how to use his fire breath correctly. Starflight, who is by far the least physically adept of the arc 1 protagonists, is able to outpace them even as four of them team up against him.
They are neither killers nor a crack team of badasses, rather they are a bunch of play-fighting, posing delinquents who talk a big game with little in terms of actual skill to back it up. Realizing this is key to understanding just how out of their depth and ill-equipped they are to handle anything that gets thrown at them on the Nightwing homeland, especially past the negotiations at the Skywing outpost.
Abduction and imprisonment
When Starflight first finds them, they have been on the Nightwing Isle for a good while, and they are suitably bristly because of it.
Look at this situation from their perspective. These guys have known nothing other than their semi-peaceful life in the Talon camp. Then the leader of that camp, Nautilus--a figure they all know and trust, essentially sells them to a frightening stranger, who looms over them and is so physically large he could crush each of them easily. This stranger pulls them away from their home without even giving them a chance to say goodbye to their relatives (I'm convinced Avalanche would not have let Morrowseer take her son if there was a chance to intervene, so Flame must have already been gone when she found out).
A contingent of Nightwing awaits them, blindfolds them so they don't know where the entrance to the Nightwing home is. They pass through a kind of eldritch tunnel that pulls at their souls. When they are finally allowed to see again, they find themselves trapped on an island where there is no sunlight and every breath hurts as the air is thick with ash.
The Nightwings won't let them leave, in fact they don't know if they will ever be able to leave again. Nobody tells them what's going on, what they are meant to do, or what the plan is. They are left confined in some room with nothing to do, and they (sans Fatespeaker) can't go outside without being arrested. Food is brought very infrequently, and usually inedible, so they haven't eaten since they were forced to leave home. They don't know where they are, nor where their parents are, nor if their parents know where THEY are. They are completely cut off from anywhere, isolated, trapped in this little slice of hell with no means to escape and little hope to acquire any soon.
I think if I was in a situation like that, I would be pretty cranky too. More than that, I would be scared out of my wits, and I believe that they are as well. If you look at their actions through a lens of them being frightened, their irritating quirks suddenly become very relatable. Viper is coping by throwing out threats and making herself seem bigger and scarier than the thing trapping her. Flame makes offensive jokes about killing Fatespeaker because making light of the situation helps him keep his wits together. Ochre is hard to read, but I think he's just tuning everything out. Squid is convinced that his father--who is the most important and smart dragon in all of Pyrrhia--has made the correct choice and knows what's best for all of them. And Fatespeaker is in complete denial, choosing to trust an inaccurate vision of the future while ignoring all the red flags that don't fit into it.
I think it's interesting that you can read this as all of them having a different strategy to cope with the uncertain and frightening situation they're trapped in. That's part of why I like them; they're very flawed and make interesting decisions.
Trauma and Empathy
You can look at someone like Squid and see his surface traits: He is annoying, he whines and complains constantly, he brags about who his father is, and he seems completely incapable of doing anything useful. If this guy was in any other story, I would probably dislike him. But Squid has the benefit of being a whiny dweeb in a situation where it is very appropriate to whine and be scared. He has a scene where he makes a somewhat goofy speech at Morrowseer where he calls him stupid and wants to go home, and is subsequently exiled. It's a bit silly in execution, but for me it did succeed in making me feel bad for Squid as he desperately and pathetically pleads for Morrowseer not to send him to his death.
But then you can read beyond the lines a little and view the scene in the full context that isn't really dwelt on. Here, you've got Squid, who is inept even among his peers, sheltered and doted on by his father, whom he has never been away from for any real amount of time until now. This guy, who probably can't even feed himself (otherwise he might have been able to catch fish in the waters around the island), keeps telling himself that his father has a plan, that all of this, even the questionable stuff, is happening for a reason. He hasn't eaten in weeks and he's been the punching bag for everyone else's frustrations (because Fatespeaker is not around enough, hanging out with Starflight). Now he has been chased halfway across the world, forced to cross the ocean while tired and starving, to be told he has to talk to a bunch of violent strangers who hate his kind and want to kill him. He tries to hide but is grabbed by the throat and held in the air by a soldier twice his size. This is likely the first time his life has ever been threatened that directly and with genuine intent.
The strange new Nightwing who was sent with them somehow manages to deescalate the situation enough to save him, but then, without warning, more dragons burst into the room. Suddenly everything is on fire, including the soldiers who just a moment ago threatened him. He is close enough to them to watch their forms twist and writhe in agony as they slowly burn to death.
As he is made to watch this horrifying spectacle, all the feelings he repressed by reminding himself of the faith he has in his father come flooding back in at once. It becomes too much for him to bear, and he breaks. He starts crying and verbally lashes out at their abuser for the horrid conditions they have been placed in and demands--half asserting and half pleading--to be allowed to go home. This isn't really whining anymore, this is a full-scale mental breakdown, rendered to be simple and digestible to a young audience. Imagine how harrowing this scene could have been if it wasn't filtered through a child-friendly narrative.
Closing thoughts
There is a scene some time after that I found kind of poignant. At one point, Starflight looks out and he sees Flame just standing out there, silently staring into the distance. There's maybe one line dedicated to it, and when you read the book normally, you don't really dwell on it since it's so nondescript. But this scene happens shortly after the visit to the remote outpost. The soldiers that burned to death in there were all Skywings. Skywings like himself, and like his mother, who also was a soldier before she joined the Talons. Whenever I picture him standing there, I imagine he is reliving that moment, hearing the dying screams of his kinsmen. I think he will be hearing them forever.
So in conclusion: The reason why I like the alternate dragonets so much is because of the enormous, untapped potential they possess as characters, and how deep some of them run if you take some time to look at them. I feel like all of them have a story to tell, and it's a bit of a shame that Sutherland likely won't come around to telling any of them. If I had infinite time, money, and energy, I would love to make many more comics about them, as they are an interesting lot.
Especially Flame's story I feel is such a heartbreaking tragedy, and thinking about the way it ended saddens me. He's one of my six all-time favorite characters in the series, I wish he could have gone out in a happier, healthier way.
#wings of fire#dragon#wof#flawseer talk#wof flame#wof squid#wof viper#wof fatespeaker#wof ochre#wof headcanon#long winded#long post
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Baldwin IVs love language
I thought about how one person could possibly win over Baldwins heart and decided to write about the ways I think he enjoys to be cherished as a partner. Hope you enjoy!
I think Baldwin prefers three out of the five love language types: Quality time, words of affirmation and physical touches. Let me explain why:
Quality time: Baldwin definitely enjoys to spend some alone time with his significant other. It doesn't matter if you sit together after a long day and you listen to him talking about the political situation in the kingdom, you two sitting comfortably next to each other while you both read a book, or even meet up to eat dinner together: this is his favorite time of the day. Spending time with you,getting to know you is THE most important thing for Baldwin. For most of his life, he usually spend the evenings either alone or with work but ever since you came into his life, he looks forward to each end of a day when he can finally join you and just cherish your company. I really think due to the leprosy and the limits of physical love that comes with it, Baldwin falls in love with a mind,not looks. So if you talk to him about philosophy,history or some good stories of French knights,he will absolutely fall for you. He really needs this time to make sure that he stays grounded, to remember he found a home in you.
Words of affirmation: While Baldwin definitely stands his ground in political discussions and acts as a remarkable ruler on the outside (and the inside!), I think he also has a very vulnerable side to him. How could he not? Carrying the future of the whole kingdom on his shoulders while suffering from an incurable disease that may or may not be connected to the wrath of God? Baldwin definitely has his moments when he is sure that he can't continue like this. Shallow moments when the anger he feels about this situation does seem to get to his head. He usually spends these moments alone in his private chambers because he doesn't want to show anyone how he much the world hurts sometimes, but after some time, he would definitely let the mask down (haha) in front of you. It may take a while for him to be really comfortable to show anyone how he truly feels but as soon as he accepts you as his safe place, he WILL let his guard down. You accepting this side of him, listening to him rambling, drying his tears feels like heaven on earth to him. He loves to hear words of support from you, how he is a good king and how proud you are of him. But sometimes it's enough for him to just listen to your breath while he lays on your chest and accept his tears.
Physical touch: Listen to me, this man is touch - starved for what seems like forever. Every day of his life consists of people avoiding his presence, avoiding his touch, fearing him. And he isn't even angry about this,how could he? They fear the leprosy and he completely understands this. He himself still can't believe sometimes that God brought this upon him and the way this illness is destroying every part of his body is utterly disturbing. Yes, sometimes he feels like a rotten corpse that somehow still clings to life. He would never EXPECT anyone to willingly touch him, although he silently hopes that he will feel physical love again...somewhen. So when you softly touch his hand while you both play chess, he is sure that he can hear the blood rushing through his veins. His heart is beating faster than ever and although he can't exactly FEEL you, seeing someone closing the physical gap is enough for butterflies to fly in his stomach. The thought alone that you don't FEAR him, that you don't think him ugly or nasty but,on the contrary, long for his touch may be the best feeling for him. So every time you draw him in for a soft hug, kiss his mask or lay your hand in his, he feels like the luckiest man on earth. He will always make sure that he and your shared physical touches aren't a danger to you tho; the last thing he wants for you is to share this unholy illness with him.
#baldwin iv#kingdom of heaven#king baldwin iv#kingdom of heaven king baldwin#edward norton#crusaders#king baldwin#kingdom of heaven 2005
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ᴇxᴀᴍ - ᴍᴀᴛᴛ ꜱᴛᴜʀɴɪᴏʟᴏ
summary: you're mind is clouded with stress due to the fact your final highschool exams are next week. matt comes over to help you with studying, and also to take your mind off everything.
contains: smut, fluff, small age gap?, swearing, crying.
—--------------------≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫-----------------——
matt and i have known each other since he was 13 and i was 11, our families have been super close for around 7 years. a year ago Matt confessed to me, I felt the exact same.
"oh my fucking god." i groan, throwing my head into my hands as i feel a burning sensation at the back of my throat.
its my final exam week starting tomorrow, and i'm attempting to catch up on last minute homework beforehand. matt graduated 2 years ago, he was top of his class, i pick up my phone and dial his number.
i need desperate help.
"hey!" matt says into the phone, a smile clear by his voice.
i sniffle quickly before starting "please come over nothing is making sense." my voice wobbles as i clutch the phone in my hand.
"oh fuck-.. no yeah ill be round in 5 minutes okay?" he says gently into the phone.
i nod like he can see me, then hang up.
-
i hear my bedroom door opening, my head snaps up to look at him from my bed. hes got worry painted across his face as i see his eyes dart over my matress, which has several books on it. "you okay?" he asks, walking over to my bed and sitting down on it opposite me.
i shake my head "i can't do this shit" i groan, matt nods understandably before grabbing my hands and pulling them away from my face.
"look at me" he says in a serious tone, i tilt my head up and lock eyes with him. "i'm gonna help you okay?"
"thank you," i say as my voice breaks.
he sits up and walks over by my side before plopping down on the bed next to me, he grabs the textbook which has around 15 questions left on it. "not even ai understands it, i tried." i sigh earning a laugh from matt, i lean my head on his shoulder.
"basic algebra, you know this, i know you do sweetheart."
i shake my head "my brains so fucking foggy i bet you i couldnt do a 6th grade multiplication table right now."
"foggy like how" he questions, tilting his head.
"just everything i have so much on my mind." i reply lifting my head off his shoulder and staring at the questions.
"you're okay, look- 'factorising an algebraic equation means writing the expression as product of factors, which are simpler algebraic expressions, this is done..." the rest of what matt says doesnt get through to me, i cant physically wrap my mind around it right now.
i feel my eyes start to water before several tears start to flow down my cheeks, "got it?" matt asks, keeping his eyes fixated on the page resting on the sheets. i stay silent "hello?" he says again, this time looking over at me.
"oh god- no no don't cry" matt panics, grabbing my cheeks and giving me a gentle kiss.
"i can't think." i squeeze out, matt wraps around me. "this might not sound like good timing but, i can.. help you?" he says nervously, grimacing slightly.
i hand him the pencil, his words not passing through. "no no, like i can take your mind off of the work for a little bit" he repeats.
realisation hits me and my eyebrows raise, my head snapping round to look at matt who has an innocent expression plastered on his face. i nod, and without another word my shirt is halfway across the room.
he laughs quietly, his shirt meeting mine in the corner of the room. his chain lays loose on his bare chest. he stands up off the bed, i lie back. "i want you to just be a... - like a uh" my eyebrows scrunch "a what?"
"i hate the word but its the best way i can describe it." matt chuckles, "say it!" i smile
"pillow princess..?" he says quietly, icking himself out.
"okay" i shake my head with a wide grin before.
matts long cold fingers reach out to grab the waistband of my sweatpants, sending goosebumps down my body. he tugs at it gently, letting it slide down my legs.
"you okay?" he asks while unclasping his belt "i think?" i reply stupidly.
he nods, his tongue sticking out to wet his now dry lips. his baggy jeans pool at his ankles, leaving him in his boxers.
"ready?"
i nod, "yep-..yeah"
he stands between my legs before hovering over me, colliding our lips together aggressively.
it never fails to shock me how he can switch from so innocent to so.. different.
i moan lightly into the kiss as i feel his clothed bulge against my inner thigh. he abrubtly pulls away from the kiss pecking kisses down my neck, to my chest, to my stomach.
i squirm desperately on the bed as he pauses just above my clit.
"more." i whine, matt shakes his head, lifting his head up and grabbing my thighs he spreads them further apart.
i throw my head back "fuck." i breathe, before i can breath again matts tip presses against my clit. i instantly look up, questioning how hes just undressed the rest of the way in under a second.
he runs his soft tip through my folds, he presses only an inch or 2 inside of me before he pulls out, continuing to tease me.
"matt i need you." i groan, my back arching off the bed.
"can you get on fours for me sweetheart?" he asks softly, i nod, instantly flipping over and arching my back.
"good girl." he coos, lining himself up with me. "gonna keep being whiny?" he asks, i shake my head no. "thats right." he says.
"this is whats gonna happen okay? you aren't gonna start asking me to slow down because i think we both know how needy you were just acting."
fuck.
i dont think a single sentence has ever turned me on more.
i nod frantically, matt presses down on my back, arching my back more.
i feel him slide halfway inside of me slowly before slamming the rest of his length into me, earning a squeal from me.
before i can even process my thoughts hes slamming full force into me, deeper and deeper each time. my moans cloud the room along with heavy breaths coming from matt.
his tip continues to bruise my cervix, i clench around him each time it does.
"fuck-.." i hear matt whimper lowly from behind me.
he reaches a hand round under me and presses on my lower stomach.
hes never done that before, but holy fuck am i glad he did.
i instantly release over matts cock, clenching harshly around him with a scream.
matt pulls out, releasing over my back.
"you-you okay?" he stammers breathlessly, flopping down beside me.
i nod, my mind fully blank.
i guess him 'helping clear my head' worked.
-
matt finishes redressing me before sitting back down next to me, the air around us is hot and thick, but matts still determened to get this homework done.
"okay- so as i was saying factorising an algebraic equation means writing the expression as product of factors...
-
matt and i have been working through the textbook for about 20 minutes, everything makes sense and now i can't understand what i wasnt understanding earlier.
"you try this one okay?" matt hands me the pencil and i start to scribble down the awnsers. "you got it!" he smiles proudly, kissing my cheek.
i yawn, tired out from.. everything.
"you tired?" he asks, wrapping him arms around me and flopping down on the mattress. "very." i reply, my voice croaky.
"you wanna sleep, we can finish this tomorrow morning okay? and ill just drop you off at school or whatever." he asks, without another word im fast asleep on his chest.
1:24am
i wake up to the sound of pencil scribbling on paper, confused i sit up. matts sitting criss cross on the bed, leaning down over my textbook and filling in all the awnsers.
"matt?" i groan, rubbing my eyes.
"go back to sleep gorgeous," he replys, looking back at me
"what are you doing.." i ask, my eyes adjusting to the light.
"im doing this for you, you already know how to do it, i saw you. you're gonna be too tired to do this in the morning." he says.
i crawl over to matt and smother him in kisses "maattt, thats adorable."
"shush, this is a one time thing." he replys, shaking his head with a smirk.
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#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#nick sturniolo#sturniolo#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo
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Detangling | S.R. imagine
this is just gonna be a short little imagine because i can't bring myself to write anything more right now and i could imagine spencer being the absolute best partner about a situation like this
You walk into the door and Spencer follows behind you. You hadn't spent as much time at your apartment since you and Spencer started getting serious, but your place was closer to the theater he had taken you to for a showing of a documentary on your favorite subject he had surprised you with tickets to go see.
After about 45 minutes of watching Star Trek on the couch together he asks you a question you'd been hoping he'd avoid asking. "It's really warm in here, love," he mentions, "why don't you take off that beanie?"
"I-I'm cold," you mutter, not meeting his eyes.
"You're flushed and sweating," he reasons, stroking a finger down your cheek before putting the back of his hand to your forehead. "You don't feel feverish. Is there another reason you're wearing the hat?" He asked with a knowing look in his eyes before you break down crying. "Wait no, please don't cry, I'm sorry I-I didn't mean to upset—" his panic is cut off by your sigh.
"It's okay, Spencer," you exhale shakily. "I'm just—I, uh, I've been feeling a little bit down recently and my hair is kind of a depression rats' nest." Your cheeks heat with embarrassment but you finally meet his eyes, which soften with understanding at your confession. "I've been hiding it with the hat until I can just go to a hairdresser and probably just have them cut it all off. It's what my mom used to make me do if I let my hair get this bad and it's kind of just the easiest way to make myself presentable again."
Spencer wraps you into a tight hug on the couch next to you. "What, uh, what if I were to help you so you don't have to cut it all off?" he asked softly, before hastily adding on, "unless that's what you want to do."
Next thing you know you're going into your bathroom and returning with a hairbrush and sitting down on the ground in front of him.
"I'm sorry about this, Spencer," you mumble as you wait on the ground in front of the couch, between his open legs. More tears prick your eyes from embarrassment and your lip trembles. "You shouldn't have to take time out of your day to take care of me like this."
"Hush, I won't hear any of that nonsense." Spencer chides from above you as he grabs the hairbrush you had approached him with. "I like taking care of you, and that's why I offered do this."
"But I—I'm an adult," the tears that welling in your eyes start to fall down your cheeks and your voice breaks as you pull your knees up to your chest. "I should be capable of taking care of myself by now!"
You hear Spencer sigh above you before you feel him shift around on the couch. He stands and walks around where you're seated until he's on his knees in front of you. He gently pulls your hands from your face, kissing each one of the palm softly and then holding them in his own. In his eyes you can see none of the shame or disgust you're expecting to see. Instead his eyes are filled with love, understanding, and concern.
He's quiet for a moment before reaching out to wipe your tears away gently. "Did you know that there are approximately 280 million people worldwide who suffer from depressive disorder? That doesn't even factor in those who suffer from depression as a symptom of an underlying physical or other mental illness." He leans in and kisses both of your cheeks. "I know there's no magic thing I can say to make you feel better, but just know that there's no shame in struggling. Or asking for help from those who love you."
"O-okay," you stammer as you look at him again before he stands and moves back to his spot on the couch. He slowly begins working his way through the tangles, holding your hair and pulling the brush through until eventually your hair is fully detangled and in need of a wash. "Th-thank you, Spencer."
He pulls you up and kisses your forehead before wrapping you into another tight embrace. "Never be afraid to ask for help when you need me, sweetheart," he whispers.
#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer x reader#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds fanfic#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff
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Hi I’m a big fan of your blog , love how you draw the characters!!
How do you think monkey king and suklha would court each other.
Helloww ♡♡♡
Funny you ask that!!! 😭 i just finished a doodle about that too!
Since Wukong's a hot tempered and unpredictable monkey king with a high self esteem. I like to add a bit of Monkey facts in his behaviour. Ofc besides the fighting the gods to keep his lover i dont think thats normal monke
From what i know, male monkeys usually start the flirting to enter a sort of consortship with the female. So i believe, Wukong despite the virgin that he is. Would be the first one to show interest.
Monkeys usually spend time with their future mate during courtship, so i figured instead of eating and talking to eachother to spend time. Wukong would challenge Suklha during the first few stages of courtship, if Suklha manages to outwit him he would let out these noises thats a mix of excited chirps and amused chuckles. Seeing Suklha managed to beat him in his own challenge is akin to her saying
"oh you're good, but ill try and beat you to show you im capable of being beside you"
even better when Suklha lets him groom her properly, it would take hours upon hours for him to show her that he's a good mate to keep her pretty and light colored hair clean. Suklha sitting down and waiting for him to finish, only to groom him back with her own pinchers is a sign that she accepted Wukong's feelings. (In his head anyway)
This works with Suklha, too. Centipedes spend time with their mates to start the mating ritual. Female centipedes usually release certain pheromones to attract the male interest. Wukong might notice how she has a more enzymatic scent, floral and berry-like, reminding him of the tree peaches in flower fruit mountain. This works with monkeys, although i think they release a certain odour when they want to mate rather than... courtship-
This in turn, makes Wukong more physically affectionate towards Suklha. His hands never leaving her waist whenever they talk to someone, glaring at anyone who dares to come pick her up like some sort of harlot. Wukong would compliment her to make her pay attention to him more whenever they're in public, of course this is Wukong. Hes not that good with compliments-
Suklha : you dimwit! Ive told you before how to do it!
Wukong : It seemed like i was right at first! Why are you getting so mad over! Just because you're decent-looking doesn't mean you can reprimand me however you like!
Suklha : ...?
Wukong , counting his fingers : Smart, quick-witted, courteous! Just because you're all that doesn't mean you can shout at me all you want!!
Suklha : i..
Wukong : AND STOP LOOKING SO GOOD
Suklha : IM BREATHING???
Wukong : WELL YOU LOOK GOOD DOING IT
Lastly, it would be a hard way to recognize but Wukong would speak towards her with a deeper tone of voice than usual. He'd even try to talk to her more calmly than yelling high-pitched like usual.
He'll smile more and probably do anything, yes even kill some demons and yaoguai to get an object of her desire or something that reminds him of her. Like a red jacket he saw in a village near the mountains, he'll snatch it and put it on Suklha without any word. Not even a "here's a new jacket" nope. They're already this deep in the courtship stage, she should understand what he means when he gives her things. He might glare at Suklha whenever he sees her missing the object he's given her, no words, just bites and glares.
All in all, it would be a bit chaotic. Like seeing your two best friends slowly getting together. Especially Suklha who despite showing interest in the courtship, suddenly denied Wukong of her answer after his proposal. Of course, this isn't done out of spite. She knows the consequences of accepting his proposal and she wont let a creature of this world suffer due to her. Suklha is a trickster, but she still has a heart.
#¿ — ask#🦭—oc#✍️—doodles#🎨—galleria#📖—writings#Suklha#jttw wukong#jttw sun wukong#jttw#jttw oc#sun wukong#sun wukong x oc#wukong x oc#oc#original character#black myth wukong oc#black myth : wukong#black myth sun wukong#wukong didnt stop there ofc#bro reincarnated and got buddha to remake his wifey thats kind acrazy ngl#this is all crazy#i had to read 3 journals abt monke courting 😭😭😭
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Title cover by me, please ask for permission to use. Not the panel but the editing :)
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Todoroki's sick?
This is just a drabble for the moment but if I post this hooray you get to see what sort of lovesick lonely relationship I want.
ITS A COMPLETE SLOWBURN PLEASE DONT HATE ME
Contains: Vomit, Illness, Spoilers.
Todoroki gets sick? Thank god your there to help him you pitiful bastard.
Your in your last year of U.A, just after your exams he gets sick. Where did Shouto go?
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"Todoroki Shouto." The same monotone voice came from your tired teacher, had his eyebags dropped even more? His eyes had surely gotten more red. He looks stoned, you wish you could be too.
Zoning out for a second too long you feel a glare from your teacher who had probably said your name mote than three times by now, flicking his scarf to slide right past your ear, a whooshing sound which jolted you out of your zoned out state.
It was the same silence, the same silence that had gone on for the past three days. Time doesn't normally matter to you, the world moves either to quick or too slow so you do your own thing.
"Focus or I'll make you run laps."
You flinch and look directly at your teacher who had moved towards your desk, black eyes slowly emitting the gloomy red that scared you sometimes. Sitting up straighter then you had ever sat you gave him a small smile before nodding a small apology. Thank god he was tired or he might have probably killed you by now.
"Ah, [Your Name]. Is there something bothering you?" Uraraka asked beside you quietly as you all began writing. To which you turned to see her eyes locked with yours.
You respond with a quick 'hm' shaking your head trying not to worry your friend, shifting your focus back to your writing as you tried not to think about specific things.
'I wonder where Todoroki is...'
'Is he with his dad? Maybe his mum...'
You shake your head and pinch your arm to refocus feeling a hint of heat on the tips of your ears. Your eyes staring intensely at the word 'mixture'.
'Fuck, that's also like him.'
Rubbing your temples now, and running a hand behind the back of your neck and pressing down on the sore spot that had grown increasingly through the pressure of homework and assignments, Hero work too.
A low muttering came from Midoryia, he was back to his usual ways even while Mr Aizawa spoke in his colourless voice. And Ashido and Kaminari were whispering to each other trying to get some form of idea as to what to write.
If you were completely honest you didn't know what to write either, the work was something about Physical and Quirk development, which was a pain when you had learned majority of it in middle school.
Yet you didn't know what to write, even if you knew about what you were learning, you still didn't know what to write. Maybe it was the three assignments that you turned in earlier today, maybe you were just burnt out.
Aizawa's words were now muffled through your thoughts as you doodled over your pages of lined, neat work. They weren't the best but they were cute enough to stay in your book.
"But sir this is too difficult!" Mina and Denki whined in unison, snapping you out of your stage of drawing and listening into the bickering, Bakugou yelling at them from across the room.
"Shuddap. If you werent so stupid maybe you would understand!"
Aizawa sighed yet again, sleep deprived probably, maybe an insomniac. "Bakugou, get back to your own work."
After a miniature altercation between Aizawa and Bakugou, it ended with Bakugou going quiet and grumbling as he continued working and Aizawa scolding Mina and Denki.
Uraraka was giggling beside you, covering her smirk and lowering her head further than what it usually is and trying to compose herself. Her brown hair was definitely longer than what it was in your first year, down to her shoulders now.
She complained that it was getting too long and that she needed to cut it but she didn't have the money, so when Momo offered to pay she declined and said that her hair was fine the way it was.
Even if she was your friend she's a little too anxious about money, even if it was ten dollars. You knew it was because of her background but she's going to be paid a shit ton in the future, if she continued with her path of being a pro.
You ponder on the small parts that you were thinking of before. 'Three days.', was the main thought as you were distracted yet again, which ended with the sake old lecture about listening and paying attention by Aizawa.
***
"[Your Name!" Tsuyu and Mina ran after you, the entire of U.A walking the same paths as the rest of the years. It was your last year, last year of all of this. It sparks an anxious pain in your chest but at the same time motivation.
You turn to face your two friends and Mina practically jumps into your arms and nearly takes the both of you to the floor. And now your winded as Tsu drags Mina off you.
"Are you going to come to dinner tonight?" Tsu asks, her croaky voice comes from her, shorter than Mina and you but thankfully taller than that purple balled idiot. He hurt your neck often when he gave you creepy smiles and all his perverted stuff.
A shrug comes from your shoulders which ends with a pampering Mina begging you not to stay cooped up in your room for the rest of winter holidays. A short answer came from your lips and Tsu's tongue was sticking out as she smiled warmly.
"Probably not, I gotta get this resume in."
Tsu nodded and pulled at Mina's shirt and trying to usher her away as to not hold you back any longer. She might not have spoke many words but she's very expressive through her emotions.
Eventually she was picked off bit by bit, and the dormitory was around a minute away walking. You were tired, but now having to write up a resume that you were planning on doing a week earlier, didn't happen. The procrastination got to you before you even started.
So you began walking, thinking about how to start on your resume even though it was simple, obviously you had to start with your full name, address... 'Would it be the dorm number or just U.A?' The thought ran through your mind before getting thrown into the many other thoughts.
You gave a small wave to Sato who was watering some of the flowers that the class planted earlier this year. He waved back only a few seconds after you, and by then you were already at the steep of the stairs. Pushing the doors open to the smell of Bakugou's food.
Ignoring the smell you looked at the elevator before taking the stairs, you were only on the first floor anyway. It was a flight of stairs, the least you could do is not be lazy.
When you unlocked your door, the small 'rodent' so you claim it to be meowed and purred against your leg.
"Hey Asana, what'cha doing pretty?" You ran a hand along the curled soft hair of your cat, you weren't really supposed to have pets in the dorms but they didn't have to know about him.
Sure, Asana was a male cat with a girl's name, but he didn't know that. He can't understand English, sometimes that makes you suspicious of him. So you shut the door behind you, picking him up and smooching his head three times before he places a paw to your nose.
"You stink."
Asana responded with a long meow, of course. He wanted food, you place him on the ground and sort him out. Flopping onto your bed with a groan of relief when the softness of the cushion collides with your back.
In less than a second, the little rodent you loved so much had jumped on you and was making biscuits on your chest, putting all his weight on his front paws, making you wheeze in pain, how could a cat be so heavy?
He purred loudly and soon after fell asleep on you, which left you scrolling on your phone and typing up this resume that you definitely needed to do before you left school. And of course it would probably take three seconds to finish, but you had sooooo many other things to do. One of them was steal Bakugou's recipe cause damn his cooking is amazing, he would mind so you would have to do it in secret.
Did he even have a recipe to follow? It would surprise you if you didn't, maybe Sato could help. Bakugou never seemed to mind him helping with cooking, he'd prefer him cleaning or doing something else. But only a grumble would be his response.
Thinking over your plan you knew it wouldn't help, you were already on social media and Mina had posted a class photo, Sato was there as well. Damn, he probably ran so he wasn't late.
It was already dark, maybe you could order in. You didn't have much energy to cook anyway, Bakugou definitely wouldn't waste his precious time cooking for you anyway, you were 'a pain in the ass'.
'Ah, I forgot about Todoroki.'
The thought that crossed through your mind from earlier today had reached you again, Midoryia said that he wasn't out with family. Iida said that he had probably become ill, with his continuous efforts at school.
"Asana, should I message him?" You ask your cat, he wasn't going to respond. Either a meow or his ears twitching would be the response.
He was dead asleep. On your chest, curled ears twitching when you sighed deeply and looked at the name on your screen, 'Shouto'. He had a small emoji next to his name, thanks to your creativity of putting what their quirks were as emoji's.
After a long groan and thinking you fumble around messaging him quickly.
'Hey Todoroki, I was wondering how you are doing since you haven't been at school.'
Sent.
Fuck.
Squeezing Asana'a pretty white fur he responded back with a low purr. Three minutes go by, feels like forever and the embarrassment of messaging someone you don't usually message. Ah, this is shit.
Your phone lights up, the notification carxges your eye.
Shouto 🧊🔥
'I'm unwell.'
Dry text. As usual, it didn't bother you as much as it used to, he's gotten better since first year.
'Would you like me to get you something?'
You message back immediately, the heat rushing to your face.
Shouto🧊🔥
'Porridge and Orange juice?'
Was all he replied before you sat up, Asana jumping off and getting comfy on your bed, maybe you should change. Sweats and a singlet? Yep.
Grey pants and a black singlet was what you wore, bringing up a hot bowl of porridge and a carton of Orange juice that was in the fridge, wasn't yours but you'll buy another one for whoever complains.
He was on the fifth floor, wasn't a preference, you would complain if you had to go up five floors.
You reach his room that was labelled with his name, Todoroki. And you knock on the door, it was dead quiet. Usually you would be able to hear Jiro playing her instruments but she was gone as well.
The door clicks open and you see Todoroki, taller than you. His hair a mess and both of his hair colours mixing with eachother, he has showered. But he looks like a mess.
"Can I come in?"
You ask quietly and he covers his cough with his elbow, nodding and turning around so you can go inside his dorm. Very traditional, you saw it a few times while studying with Sero. He cleans regularly, but it's gotten messy since he's been sick.
There was a bucket next to his bed, has he been really sick? Maybe Gastro.
"Sit back down I don't wanna make you run around or something." You usher him back to his futon, you have the kindest expression on and aren't trying to push him around too much.
The room has a hint of sickness in it too, maybe you would get sick too. Oh well.
He sits down with his legs crossed and looks up at you, his face puffy and his hair still a mess, he looks like his gaze is a blur and you gently give him the porridge.
"Have you been eating?"
This is awkward, first you had to message him and now your stuck in his room, with him when he is sick. Your eyes wander and he eats the porridge slowly, blowing on the spoon a few times and switching off his phone. He nods to your question, responding back in a sick and croaked speech.
"Mhm, not much."
Your breath tightened, his voice was usually deepish and monotone but when he's sick. Jesus, gonna take the life outta you.
In less than a second that all changes when he leaps towards the plastic bucket beside his futon and gags profusely, throwing up the porridge he had eaten mere seconds earlier, his stomach trying to throw up on an empty stomach now.
You quickly make your way towards him and kneel down beside him, he puts a hand out to stop you but you move his hair out of the way. It had gotten longer throughout the years but your pretty sure he's been missing his hair appointments.
"Come on Todoroki! Why didn't you let us know." Grumbling beside his ear, he wipes his mouth before sitting back up again, washing his mouth out with the cup of water beside the bucket and spitting it into the bucket.
He goes to stand up, but you keep him sat down, giving him the carton of orange juice that you had brought earlier, were you holding that while keeping his hair out of the way?
"What are you doing?" He asks in the same groggy probably drugged up voice while watching you pick up the vomit filled bucket and taking it to the toilet in his room.
You look back at him, pushing the toilet seat up and pouring the foul substance into the toilet. Flushing it before closing the lid. "You need to rest. Your not getting up unless I'm gone."
Strong tone and using the shower head in the bathroom to rinse the bucket, you turn your head to see if he agrees.
"It's only a stomach bug."
"A stomach bug that makes you look like your about to die."
"Every illness makes you look like that."
"Your not getting up unless you need to go to the toilet. Your quirk is going to drain your energy so don't use that either."
He sighs, not wanting to argue and knowing you were kind of right, he hated to admit it but he actually liked that you cared for him like that. He had gotten used to looking out for himself but when his friends and classmates helped him he realised he also had to look out for others.
"Fine."
He couldn't help it however. He wasn't that sick, right?
You sit down beside him on his futon and look at the half eaten bowl of porridge, he was drinking the juice in hand and staring at you with those oh so beautiful eyes. But it's when he leans over and rests his head on your shoulder that makes you freeze.
"Thanks."
Was all he spoke before closing his eyes and breathing in your scent, you were confused as to why he had done so. Maybe he liked you? Is he clingy when he's sick?
You chuckle and pat his back, he was already relaxed into you but your physical touch made him melt, his body weight becoming evident on your body. So you use majority of your strength to keep sitting up, while adjusting to his weight.
His eyes were closed against you and his breathing became quieter and quieter until you almost could mistake him for being dead. It was soon you realised you were both breathing at the same pace. Did that always happen when two were so close?
Spotting a damp rag on the floor, you pick it up to feel if it is still cold, it wasn't. You couldn't move yet because he was practically attached to you. Jolting when you moved even an inch, so now you were laying down beside him on the single futon. His head against your arm and his arm along your waist.
This wasn't like him, for sure. Was he mistaking you for someone else? Your hoping he's not, cause whoever he would be thinking about like this. Wasn't you.
"It's cold." He speaks quietly, it's only then that you realise the chill in the air. It was already night? But the sun was up, you checked your phone that was sat in your pocket. Your eyes widen at the time. Two hours?!
Two hours had gone by and you could have finished this resume. You couldn't have wished for anything better, or worse? Todoroki Shouto was asleep on you, but you needed to finish this resume.
"Todoroki-"
"Shouto."
"Uh- Alright then. Shouto, I have to get this resume done."
He grumbled and geld onto you tighter, looking up at you, oh lord, he was adorable. Looking up at you with his opposite coloured eyes and pouting ever so slightly.
"Just do it in here."
"Ok then."
Why would you want to argue with him like that? You felt a sense of pity because he was sick, but also because he actually wanted you to stay with him? Your living a dream that you so desperately don't want to end. Maybe if he was well this would send you head over heels.
***
"Hey Todoroki! Where's [Your Name]?" Mina asks with her usual bubbly attitude, staring up at the taller boy with her 'raccoon eyes' as others have said.
Todoroki looks up from the book he was writing in, locking eyes with Mina, Asui was standing next to her with her frog-like tongue sticking out as he responded, scratching the side of his neck.
"She's not feeling well."
"What?!" Mina exclaims, her hands coming to the top of her pink curls quickly as she looked shocked. "She didn't even go anywhere! How did she get sick?"
"She came to visit me when I was sick." He replied back in a monotone speech and got back to writing whatever was on the board. Not knowing how excited Mina looked when she turned to Asui and giggled running off.
'Did I say something wrong?'
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This story is officially FINSIHED! I know I definitely lost some sort of motivation towards the end, I hate slowburns but I do say so myself. This is alright.
Proofread!
Thank you for all the support I have been getting! d=(^o^)=b
#mha#mha headcanons#mha x reader#mha fluff#shouto todoroki#shoto todoroki#shoto x reader#todoroki x y/n#todoroki x you#todoroki x reader#shouto x reader#bnha shouto
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Battle
Pairing: Rhysand x Reader
Summary: You and Rhys talk things out after he refuses to let you go into hybern war.
A/N: hehe First Rhysand fic. I love this. Also I'm so bad at writing titles you guys I swear. Please tell me a better title so I can change this one.
Masterlist
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"Are you kidding me?!" You yell the second you enter Rhysands tent, knowing full well the anybody outside can easily here but you don't care.
"You ordered Azriel not to send me out?" You were in the middle of a battle and apparently you High Lord had told his shadowsinger not to give his second in command any assignment.
It only fuled your anger when he answered without looking at you,"Yes I did."
"Do you realize how embarrassing that was for me?"
"Embarrassing?"
"Yes!"
"That's what you're thinking about? How embarrassing it was for you?" His displeasure clear in his voice.
"Yes! Everyone had positions, everyone had tasks and I was just standing there with nothing as my Spymaster told me to stay back because the High Lord ordered him so." The mock in you voice makes him look at you, finally leaving the papers.
"I didn't sent you because I don't want to endanger you. I don't want be on that battle field and worry about you every second. I don't want to be wondering if you are safe or laying there in the pile of bodies where I probably wouldn't be able to find you. So I apologise, if it embarrasses you to stay where you are safe but I wont-," His voice cracks. "I can't see you in danger."
Oh.
The realisation flared your eyes and you look down in an attempt of hiding you surprise.
The two of you had been kind of a pair before he got stuck under the mountain. You loved him, still do but never told him because how can a High Lord love a mere spy like yourself. The two of you were clearing interested in each other before you got the news that he is stuck with Amarantha.
You wanted to go after him, to save him but Azriel had strictly denied you to do so. And when he finally came back, after fifty years, you thought maybe he had moved on. There was no way he could still be interested in the same person after five decades, only you were stupid enough to do so.
So you didn't do anything about it, only keeping things strictly profession after he came back. Until now.
The two of you were silent for a few minutes before he sighed and said in a tone a lot calmer than before,"I'm sorry I shouldn't have talked to you like that."
He puts in hands one his face, resting his elbows on the desk table in front of him, refusing to look at you anymore. You don't know what to say, so you just say the first thing that comes into your mind.
"I thought you and Ferye were..." You trail off, wincing as he looks at you, his expression making you regret your words.
"No, no. We are just allies, that's all. Friends maybe but not anything more." He looks physically ill at the thought of them together and your lips curl upward a little. He then again looks down, can't seem to look at you for more than a minute.
You slowly walk upto him, standing beside him and turning him around by his shoulders to look at you. "Rhysand, I understand that you fear for me but I'm Azriel's second, I can look after myself. I mean being the Spymaster's second has to mean that I'm good at surviving, right?"
His violet eyes look for your reaction as he gently tugs you to him, when you dont push him away, he hugs you. You now stand between his legs, him sitting gives you a small advantage of hieght and he rests his forehead to your chest, wrapping his arms around your waist, he sighs. "I just don't want to lose you."
His voice melts you, sounding so small and vulnerable, turning every thought in your head about him. Your hands lift to wrap around him too, one resting on his shoulders and the other gently running fingers through his silky hair.
"I'm going to be alright, Rhysand. You are too, we are going to need every help we can get in this war. And I can't just sit hear worrying about you all, while you go fight for your life out there. I'm a big girl, Rhys, I can handle myself."
He sighs and you know you've won this argument. He lifts his head to look at you with the most serious expression he can master and says,"Fine. But if something happens to you out there, I'm bringing you back, screaming and kicking, even on my shoulder if you don't listen. I'll even tie you to the bed if I have to."
"Promise?" You smirk.
His eyes narrow,"Yes and I'll fuck you senseless after as a punishment for not listening to me."
You laugh, silently agreeing because you're looking forward to doing that either way.
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#acotar#acotar fandom#acotar fanfiction#acotar fluff#rhysand x reader#rhysand#rhys x reader#rhys#Rhysand angst#rhysand fluff
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Thinking about an AU where the manual did cause Binghe to qi-deviate and ruin his cultivation potential exactly one year after he's taken in as disciple. Seeing that anyone would have suffered the same fate, it wasn't some kind of karmic punishment directed at Shen Qingqiu for being an unpleasant, hateful little thing (the self-hatred and projection is Real in this one) settles something in him, like a broken peace of him is suddenly jolted back into its proper place. It makes him lose interest in torturing Binghe any further.
That does leave him with a disciple that's not suited to his peak in any way shape or form, so clearly the next step is to have one of the other peaks take him off his hands. He subtly puts out word while Binghe is on Qian Cao recovering, so that anyone who might want the brat can take him after the next peak lord meeting, but there really is only one choice.
Out of the peaks with a physical cultivation style, Bai Zhan is out of the question on account of Binghe's ruined potential, Ku Xing doesn't take children this young and, in his opinion, Binghe is just too stupid and trusting to make it on Qiong Ding or An Ding, so clearly that only leaves Zui Xian. If the little beast is fortunate, eating all the spiritual food might even help him recover a little.
Perfect plan!
All he needs is to make up a good enough excuse as to why he allowed the little beast to cultivate from a faulty manual or let him be bullied. And he knows already how he's going to do it: he will let Qi Qingqi make the excuse for him.
"Qi-shimei," he says, the very picture of nonchalance, as if Liu Qingge didn't have a sword at his neck. "I know you assume that any disciple of yours returning to secular life will do so at the side of a powerful husband, but if that was not the case: how would you test if someone of lowly birth and no connections could survive the court environment?" Qi Qingqi thinks about it for just a moment before her mouth twists into an unhappy pout, eyes lighting up with understanding. "Let him go, Liu-shidi. It was not an attempt at murder, merely Shen-shixiong being a crafty old dog who made a test too harsh for Luo-shizhi." "But-" "Scholars, like my girls, are intrinsically linked to the mortal courts, as much sages and exemplars in the four arts as advisors in politics. If one has no allies, then connections must be made. Bullies that can't be fought head on must be outwitted or circumvented." She gives the fake manual a disgusted glance. "Ill intent and sabotage must be recognized, regardless of its source. Without these qualities, someone without proper backing will be dead the week they set foot in court." "Quite. Disciple Luo has failed each and every one of those criteria: he bent obediently to the whims of his bullies, made no friends or sought no help from anyone on or off peak, and kept cultivating from the faulty manual with a bullheaded stubbornness that surprised even me. I fully expected him to realize at least as much, but he proved too simple even for that." He resists the urge to smile when Liu Qingge reluctantly withdraws his sword. It's a sweet, if easy victory.
So Luo Binghe goes to the food and wine peak, where he can make friends, his heart (and to a degree his cultivation) can be mended and his trust in his higher ups isn't scorned or abused, but he never forgets that Shen Qingqiu sent him away because he found him too stupid for his peak. Shen Qingqiu picked him, only him, from dozens of potential disciples and was disappointed. He keeps striving, even years later, to somehow get Shen Qingqiu's approval, taking every opportunity to loiter on Qing Jing with food offerings and all sorts of excuses. He's almost as bad as the sect leader! They do, indeed, bond with Yue Qingyuan over being the frequent targets of Shen Qingqiu's ire.
Then one day when Binghe is around 17 a qi deviation splits Shen Qingqiu into two: the scarred, sharp-tongued and vicious Shen Jiu and the sickly, soft hearted and kind Shen Yuan, and Luo Binghe suddenly feels vindicated in his dogged insistence because the soft Shen Qingqiu likes him! It's literally the best thing in the world!! And maybe sect leader Yue helps him a few times to steal Shen Yuan away on some absolutely-not-a-date picnics, so it's really only fair that he helps him reconcile with the sharper Shen Jiu (Binghe can't see the appeal, personally, but as long as Yue-shibo doesn't want to take his Shen Qingqiu too then he's fine with those two doing whatever).
Everything seems to be going perfectly (QiJiu have reconciled, BingQiu are almost inseparable), but then Binghe leaves the mountain to gather ingredients for the very special meal he wants to propose with, trips and stumbles straight into the Abyss and the rest is SVSSS-typical miscommunication and demon shenanigans.
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My Holy Grail Fics
After the past several months of reading TXF fic, here are some of my ultimate faves so far! I’d love to know what your holy grail fics are, as well. This fandom is full of incredibly talented writers!
(Also, if have any recommendations of fics you think I’d like, send them my way!)
The Boy on the Beach by @cecilysass
I read this entire thing yesterday. Ooh boy was it a page-turner! Time travel in fiction can get dicey, but this one handles it so well. I love how the time travel plot forced M&S to confront themselves and their pasts in order to better understand each other and move forward in their relationship.
Gaslight by @sisterspooky1013
This one should come as no surprise to you. It’s rare that a fic consumes my every waking thought and I spend every free second reading as much as possible, and boy, this fic delivered. I’m such a sucker for stories like this one where the character(s) don’t know if they can trust their own minds and have to really dig deep inside themselves to find the truth.
Pause by @cecilysass
Similar concept to Gaslight as far as the amnesia goes, but totally different vibes! I love the dramatic irony of the reader putting together the pieces before Scully does. It’s agonizing in the best way!
Fall Into Place series by @skelavender
My favorite WIP fic! I look forward to reading the newest installment every Friday. I adore the slowburn, UST, teetering-on-the-edge-of-something-more MSR, and LT is the master of it! This series is filled with heart-squeezy moments that make me feel like I’m melting into a puddle of goo.
X-File #02291996 by @skelavender and @7crowsinadress
Time loop my beloved! Such an interesting (and 🔥🔥🔥) take on this trope. I can’t wait to see where it goes!
Arizona Highways by Fialka
I’m always down for an Emily AU, and this one has such a compelling, angsty twist and an air of mystery that forced me to keep reading late into the night!
Tempest by MissyPennington
I love a good survival story! There’s something so delicious about two people leaning on each other both physically and emotionally to keep going. The follow-ups are incredible, too!
All That Is Dark and Bright by @malibusunset-xf-blog
Amazing Emily AU! Dad!Mulder is my weakness. Plus, I love the way they figured out how to treat her illness. It really felt like something that would happen in canon.
I’ve Got You Under My Skin by cuits
Beautiful soulmate AU! Only M&S could have literal, undeniable proof they’re soulmates and still overthink their relationship to a ridiculous level. And I ate it up! Give me the angst! The drama! The tension!
Emily AU by skuls
Last Emily AU, I swear! This series melts your heart in the first installment, crushes it to pieces in the second one, and then makes everything better in the finale.
Update 7/16/24
Here’s some more!
Blinded by White Light by @dashakay
Omens by lepusarticus
Heuvelmans’ On the Track by The_Mythopoedic
Finding Rokovoko by prufrockslove
Belphegor’s Prime by prufrockslove
#thanks to LT for recommending like half of these and converting me into a longfic enjoyer#txf#the x files#fanfiction#txf fic#msr#dana scully#fox mulder#holy grail#mine
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Rewatched Deadpool 1. Took notes.
WARNING: Discussion of mental illness topics, ending yourself, trauma, violence, etc.
Civil debate/ conversation welcomed. Sorry its super long. I think a lot.
Notes:
You know what? We see Wade coloring a lot. What's our status on just giving him cartoons snacks and coloring books? He needs it.
I think we all forget how actually impressive this man is. I just watched this cancer having fucker do like 50 flips.
Whatta man is so Logan Howlett coded.
"Bad deadpool" "good deadpool!"
Deadpool has been helping kids for a while. He terrified a little creep while he himself was a huge creep.
Missed up his words and Vanessa smiled at him. With that "aw hes cute" kinda thing.
When talking about their childhood (whether he's lying or not, hes not about the uncle) and he outdos her so much that she giggles.
The first date he takes her ducking skiiballing instead of yk prostitute stuff
Hes so romantic oh my god.
Theyre giggling and joking like all the time. Personally thanksgiving is my favorite scene before he proposes with a fucking ring pop.
I shouldn't laugh but the way he said "wtf" when passing out
Vanessa instantly jumping to "what can we do? There has to be something" makes me instantly respect her as a chronically ill person myself. Partners who medically defend each other make me so happy because a lot of people divorce their partners when they get "too sick" let alone dont show up to specialist appointments.
Him accepting death so quickly is a sign of mental illness, and you can see him be confused on why shes so upset. Shes crying and hes sitting here like "why do you care if I die or not?" He physically feels so unloved that he just doesn't get it.
"I dont know. Might further the plot. " Oh, so you know about wades little mental tv show he puts on in his head as a coping mechanism?
Also... Weasel.. YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS A WEASEL!? Shit sorry wrong movie.
Its not until now that hes crying because he realizes if he does then no more vanessa. We already know hes very co dependent and many people only care about themselves BECAUSE of other people. Which is also considered a sign of wanting to ☠️ self.
The whole "superheros are all lame ass teachers pets" thing is so funny if you think about how much beef he has with the xmen when in reality I have a feeling Wade would love charles in a "Ugh im in trouble with Daddy wheel chair again." COUGH "old bald heavens gate looking mother fucker" COUGH
"Thats not nice" No. But wade is genuienly not nice either.
"This is embarrassing. Please stop, " Colosus said what we all were thinking.
Bro literally cut/broke off his own hand and didn't whine a single time. If you ever. EVER hear this man express pain it is 99.9% his own choice to let you know that it hurts.
During his changing process, Francis says "the only thing that doesn't survive is a sense of humor" wade says "we'll see about that" and smirks.
What also makes sense to me is that he did NOT break easily. They did test after test after test and this man still wasn't breaking. His spirit is incredibly strong and as much as we enjoy joking about how stupid he is, Wade is extremely resourceful.
Its like he has created an alter ego of humor and kindess in order to keep up with the fact he DOES understand how fucked up this world is and whats happening/happened around him but refuses to acknowledge it until he has too. Ussually for survival.
Ive seen theories that he has DID or a type of Scizophreania and the voices in the comics are obviously in his head. I have mixed feelings about it because even his thoughts have thoughts of their own in some cases. Talking to no one is often a sign of abadonment, esspecially in children who are school age and get lonely when taken from their families to attend school. Its almost as if wade never lost his and hes subconsiously talking to himself to keep himself calm/ from panicking in high stress situations.
"But then how does he know hes in a movie" thats the thing. He doesn't. Hes pretending to cope. Main charaters cant die and until he dies he has this mental show/movie going on to keep himself from realizing all of this is true. That this is reality.
Cunningham mentions breakfast for his kids and suddenly, wade wakes up. Hes not joking anymore. This is a "oh shit... I wanna make breaktsst for my kids too... with my wife vanessa" moment.
"So whats wrong with him?"
Diiiiiddd we all forget about scout master kevin? Uncle? Dad? That fact that the oxygen was physically taken from his brain and was given Co2 poisoning over and over? For multiple days? This is the same man who blew himself up just to escape because they told him he wasnt going to see vanessa again.
And then he fought a guy naked, survived the entire building burning down, and now is so insecure about his looks that he thinks he made the baby cry in the street.
Theres people staring at him, flinching away, called names, people see him and cross the street. (So when he tells Logan that he knows his pain when it comes to public settings, hes not lying)
Blind Al is literally the reason deadpools suit is what it is. Why the idiot thought white was gonna be a good idea- See above. Unlike Al, who could smell the blood/ bleach.
I really love al. She's like the adult Toph.
"I hear everything in this duplex." OH, you poor thing.
"The guy that turned me into this freak-"
Al: *bitch im blind face*
As far as she's aware, he looks normal. Which is beautiful when you think about it, but it's funny when you think about the fact that he's so insecure about his face that he purposly found a blind room mate that couldn't judge him.
And they cuddle while he gets dating advice from grammie 🥹❤️
I really like how the entirety of Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Children (HellHouse in the comics) stood up for Weasel. They're murderers. But they're family.
What they did to vanessa was straight fucked. Her fiance up and leaves without notice, youre just trying to work and live your life, you get kidnapped.
Negasonic is so cool. I love them.
Dopinder (The cab guy) is so cool too. I love him too. Kill that guy in your trunk. "Mr. Pool" reminds me of Tom holland spiderman.
"It is not boy band >:(" Suurreee it isn't.
"Wheres your duffle bag?" You mean his dollar general store tree hello kitty book bag filled with guns?
"Cue the music" *no one even gives a fuck at this point when he talks to the imaginary cams*
Negasonic mid battle: Hold on- "Hey Yukio, yeah I just gotta fuck shit up real quick, ttyl?"
"Sure thing! <3 You go baby!"
I dont know anything about negasonic but she reminds me of Gambit with her energy powers.
Like I said. Hes smart when its a serious situation because he immediately threw his katana into the glass so vanessa could breathe, only to immediately turn sappy and childish again when he sees her stab francis with it. Heart hands, is hallucinating because theres a knife in his brain (literally), sex joke. Etc.
Colossus shut the fuck up. Let this man kill him. He's hurt Soooooo many people. A bullet costs less then a dollar. His amount of therapy alone is going to be like *checks calculations* 80 billion.
"Not the nethers" Wade can and often does show proof of hurting but hed rather cut off his hand then let vanessa punch him in the balls. "Ow- owie 5000"
Hello Hugh Jackman.
After not seeing each other for so longer they instantly go back to the fibbing. "I live in the house with 12"
"You live in a house??" Funny guys get the girls. I should know. My wife says im super funny (yes im in therapy)
Pinky promises really matter to him.
Hes such a silly billy he brought out the phone with their song on it. God what a romantic idiot.
#deadpool 1#deadpool movie#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool franchise#ryan renolds#hugh jackman#logan Howlett#merc with a mouth#weasel deadpool#colossus#negasonic teenage warhead#yukio deadpool#professor x#xmen#charles xavier#notes#movie analysis#charater analysis#mental illness#wade wilson#deadpool#whatta man#blind al#althea anderson#francis freeman#vanessa carlysle#vanessa deadpool#lets discuss#dopinder#dopinder deadpool
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Remember My Heart, How Bright I Used to Shine
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader
Setting: Daryl’s Camp (During Time Jump)
Warnings: Typical TWD Violence and Gore; Angst; Illness
Summary: You had always thought he was invincible. Then your world came crashing down.
A/N: DO NOT PANIC. It’s a little bit a ride but if you start, hang in there. It’s probably been done before. Probably cliche. Meh. This plot bunny wouldn’t leave me alone and had to be set free. I know it’s rushed and not my best but it’s done now and I feel better.
gif by @daryl-dixon-daydreams
You stared, eyes wide and unblinking, as if you could make it go away by sheer force of will alone. At first, you couldn’t even cry but when the tears came, they came with a vengeance, hot and endless over your cheeks and down your neck. It’s not real. It can’t be real.
The day was like any other. You were up and helping around Alexandria. The air always felt different to you now. Like you could physically feel his absence. You had simply learned to breathe it in and mold it into a way to have him near. You had seen him a few times in the last five years, when you could pull away from the needs of the community and trek into the woods, or when he would come around to help out and just visit with everyone. He would give you a smile and you would return it. You never went to him because if you touched him, you’d never let go. Carol usually kept you up to speed via letters from the Kingdom. Knowing he was safe and healthy proved to be enough.
It wasn’t though. Not really. No letter would keep you from crying yourself to sleep with your hand on the empty space next to you. No letter would keep you from staring hopefully each time the gates opened, waiting for him to walk through. No letter would convince you that he was out of your reach and you would have to move on.
You had just finished covering a section of the crops now that cold weather was setting in, dragging your feet after a long day when Michonne jogged over with an envelope. You returned her smile, yours tired and grateful while hers was gentle and understanding. You had both lost the men you loved. Michonne felt guilty that it was Rick keeping Daryl away from you, though you had asserted time after time that she had nothing to be sorry about.
You decided to read the letter in your room, weary to your very bones. Your bed was calling your name but you only sat on the edge. If you laid down, you’d be asleep before you could get the envelope open. Carol’s fancy handwriting was on the outside, beautiful lines and curves that spelled out your name. You opened the envelope with a sniff, ready to cry when she informed you that he was fine and grumpy as ever.
Except that’s not what it said.
You dropped the letter and grabbed your bag, out the door and running to the gate with weapons in hand, not even on your belt.
‘Come to the camp. NOW.’
And that’s how you came to be here now, just inside Daryl’s tent, Carol off to the side, not crying but her face and eyes puffy as if she’d already had her time. Daryl was pale, his shirt off, and leaning back on his hands.
The bite on his ribs was inflamed, taunting you. Laughing at your dreams of happily ever after with that man.
“Daryl.” Your words wobbled, the tears just not stopping.
“C’mere.” You fell into him, muffling your wail against his already too warm skin. He had sat up to hold you tight, rocking you back and forth with his lips pressed into your hair. Whispered reassurance against your ear. “S’gonna be alright.”
“How?” You sat back, wet eyes pleading. “How is it gonna be alright, Daryl?”
He shared a look with Carol and dropped his gaze. “Just wanted to see ya ‘fore—‘fore I take care’a it.”
It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the meaning behind that. “No.” You shook your head adamantly, crawling on your knees to grab his face, a little rougher than you had intended. “You’re gonna fight, you hear me? You’re gonna fight this until the end.”
“Y/N—”
“No!” You barked at Carol with a finger pointed at her. “Call me selfish. Yes, I’m fucking selfish.” Daryl wrapped his hand around the one you held out, leading it to his mouth. He kissed your palm but kept his fingers around yours, lowering them to the small space between you.
“Shouldn’t hafta do it. Neither’a ya.”
“It should always be someone who loves you.” He smiled at you, sad and hopeless. “And I love you, Daryl Dixon. I’m not leaving you and I’m not letting you eat a bullet for my sake.” He opened his mouth to once again object, your arms around his neck, your face buried against his shoulder, gave him pause. “Please. I haven’t been with you in so long. Let me have this. I’ll take care of you. And—I’ll do what has to be done.” Your lip began to quiver. “I won’t let you turn, Daryl. I swear it.”
You couldn’t see the exchange between him and Carol, but after a few tense moments, his hands were on your back, holding you tighter. He sighed. “Okay.”
It was hard to watch. His skin had dulled to nearly gray, deep dark circles around dull blue eyes. He had stopped giving you those reassuring smiles. They just took too much energy.
His skin was burning, a fever raging that you knew no medication could affect. You could only wipe him down with a damp, cool cloth. He would always sigh with relief, whether it was for the reprieve from the heat or just to make you feel better, you’d probably never know.
Sometimes he would just tense and grit his teeth. He never told you what hurt, knowing there was nothing you could do. He simply didn’t want you to feel worse; like you had failed him. You already held that miserable guilt close to your heart.
The cough had come gradually, from small utterances to deep, ragged barks that would not only send specks of blood flying but had him crying out when the force of them jarred his entire body.
It was when everything had quieted that you felt the most terrified. You were just outside the tent, giving Carol some privacy with him. You could see but not hear. She was leaning over him, crying. He was so weak that he couldn’t even lift his arm to wipe her tears. You knew he would if it were possible.
The other woman was nodding, most likely hearing his wishes for certain things. Things like Dog, who laid a few feet away from you, his ears twitching. Daryl had asked for him to let in a while earlier. The canine seemed to understand, moving slowly around his papa before lying close to his head. It pained Daryl to even be touched, Dog whined but never tried to lick him. After a few moments, the animal had trotted out and laid where he was in front of you.
When you turned back to the tent, Carol was coming out. Her distress was written clearly across her expression. She was losing her best friend. Still, she offered you a hand and helped you to your feet. Before you could enter, she flicked her finger over the buckle holding your knife at your thigh.
“You promised him. If you can’t do it, call for me. But don’t wait.” It wasn’t cruel. You nodded and she let go.
You didn’t say anything as you crawled to a spot beside him, almost touching but not quite. There was a moment of just watching him breathe. You could feel the heat of the fever from where you laid. His breaths were shallow rasps. His eyes were closed.
“Daryl?” You nearly whispered.
“M’here.” He still didn’t open his eyes.
“I love you.”
“Don’t let that stop ya from livin’, ya hear me?” He coughed, his face contorting into a pained grimace. “Ya find someone that sees you. Ya don’t settle fer less.”
“There’ll never be anyone else, Daryl.”
A tear slid down his temple. “That’s what ‘m afraid of—”
“I love you.” You repeated. Daryl wasn’t a words kinda guy. Never had been. He said things through actions. It was one of the things you loved about him. Still, just this once, you wanted to hear it. Needed to hear it.
“I love ya too, woman. Pain in my ass.”
You laughed wetly, the sound shifting into sobs when his head lulled to the side. You were going to have to do what you promised soon, allowing him to finally rest. He would be taking your heart with him. You couldn’t even begin to think of how you would survive this.
Seconds turned into minutes of watching his chest rise and fall, shallow and wheezing. Minutes turned into hours. You kept watch diligently, shifting positions around him to get comfortable or keep yourself awake. It had been at least 3 hours, well into the night when Carol peeked inside, her eyes bloodshot, exhaustion radiating from her.
“Is it—done?” She whispered.
You shook your head. “He’s still with us. He even feels a little cooler. Maybe it’s just me. Would you check?” With a sharp breath, she crawled into the tent and clumsily made her way to the archer’s side. Her palm hesitated just above his forehead, a look of trepidation on her face when she looked to you and back. His skin was warm against her palm but not frighteningly hot. She flipped her hand, sure she was mistaken.
“He’s cooler. He—he’s breathing easier. Y/N, I don’t understand.” You crawled over to meet her on the opposite side, feeling his forehead again for yourself. Carol continued as if his temperature would alter in the mere seconds that had passed while you pulled down the blankets covering his torso. The bite was still red, the veins around it a sickly black.
“Carol, he should—he should be gone. Look at this.” Frozen and befuddled, the two of you stared at the wound, wondering if you had finally been pushed over the edge by grief.
Another twenty four hours passed in nervous silence. Carol was forging and hunting while you saw to Daryl’s care. The bite was less inflamed but the black veins remained. His fever had broken during the night, and the rattling in his lungs had lessened to a quiet wheeze.
“I don’t know what’s going on,” you whispered, applying a fresh bandage to his ribs, “but I am freaked the fuck out.” You flinched back when Daryl let out a moan, your hand reflexively sitting on the hilt of your knife. He moved, shifting his shoulders and trying to sit up, uncoordinated and robotic. It did not inspire confidence. “Daryl?”
The heel of his hand was pressed into his forehead but dropped to his lap when he heard his name. When he turned toward your voice, your heart sank. His eyes were milky and yellow.
“No.” You whimpered, scrambling back as far as the tent allowed. You drew your knife slowly. You had promised you wouldn’t let him turn. Promised. Your naivety had caused you to slip, and you’d live with the guilt for the rest of your life. “I’m sorry.” You sobbed, moving toward him slowly though he had yet to even attempt to approach you. “I’m so sorry.”
His head tilted curiously. “What for?”
You sucked in a breath while your knife fell from suddenly inept fingers. “Oh my god.” Your jaw hung open, there was just no other way to react. “Daryl?”
“Yeah?”
“Daryl?” You repeated, inching closer with a hand outstretched. His brow creased.
“Ya hit your head or somethin’?”
“I just—you were—you look—”
“Guess if I look as rough as I feel, s’prolly ‘nough’a a reason to be actin’ all weird.” He ran a hand through his hair and coughed, rubbing at his throat. “What happened anyway?”
Your hand finally connected with his stubbled cheek, the skin warm. He watched you in confusion, uttering your name in a questioning tone as you placed two fingers against his neck, finding a pulse easily.
“Daryl—Daryl, you were bit.” You were retracting your hand, the archer looking at you with horror etched in every line of his face when you heard a bow string pulling taut. “Carol, no!” If you had been one second later or couldn’t have reached her at all, the arrow would have hit its mark. Instead, it nicked his ear and arched into a bag of supplies behind him.
“What the fuck, Carol?!” He shouted, gingerly touching his ear and staring at the blood on his fingertips. Yet another indicator of life. His blood was red.
Carol gasped and stumbled backwards, narrowly missing the firepit when her ass hit the ground. “It’s not—Y/N, he’s—”
“Can one’a ya please fill me in here? I was bit?!” You crawled back into the tent and reached for his ribs. He hadn’t noticed the bandage until then, his gaze on the tendrils of black running from beneath. “What—what the fuck?” Petite fingers peeled away the fresh gauze and revealed the jagged bite, the shape being the key indicator of what it truly was since the teeth had dragged a bit when he fought off the walker. “How the fuck m’I still here?”
“That’s not all, Daryl.” You looked around for anything reflective, considering beating the mirror from his bike but you didn’t want to give the guy an aneurysm along with the news he’d just received. “Something metal, something reflective.” You said hastily as you passed Carol, who remained sprawled on the ground. She pointed to one of the cooking pots without taking her eyes off her best friend. A spoon!
Grabbing it up you jogged down to the river to quickly wash it, looking at your own reflection to ensure it was enough. “Here.” You were holding it out before you had even entered the tent. There was a fear in his expression that you couldn’t see in those lifeless eyes, and that unsettled you.
He didn’t say anything when he saw, but stared for a long while. “Need a minute.”
You shook your head. “Daryl, I really don’t want to—”
“Please.” He was still staring at the spoon and didn’t see your nod. You zipped up the tent behind you and sat down beside Carol. Both of you wore dazed expressions.
“He didn’t die.” She whispered.
“He didn’t turn.” You continued. “What does this mean? Carol, do you think he’s—do you think he’s immune?”
It was more than an hour later when you heard a soft call of your name. You and Carol had settled into anxious silence, every scenario running through your mind, good or bad. What if he turned later? What if he was still sick and infectious? What if he needed to eat people to survive?
You dusted off your pants after you stood, crouching to open the zipper and crawl inside with him. Daryl was lying on his side, facing away from you.
“Are you okay?” Gentle fingers grazed up and down his spine, an attempt at comfort that you weren’t sure he’d even want.
“Would you be?” He asked quietly.
“No,” you answered in kind, “no, I suppose not.” He wasn’t crying, he was just still and somehow that was worse. “Hey.” You crawled around his legs to lie down next to him, your face inches from his. His eyes were closed, his brow still drawn. “I don’t know for sure, but I think you may be immune.” His eyes peeled open slowly, squinted in fear of your impending repulsion. All you saw was a beautiful set of ice blue orbs staring back at you. “Your eyes—”
“They freak me out, too.” He whispered with a slight curl of his lip.
“No, they’re normal.” You made a grab for the spoon and held it up for him. He didn’t appear to be relieved. “It’s okay, Daryl. You’re okay.”
“We don’t know jack shit ‘bout what’s goin’ on. Can’t say m’okay when we don’t know.” He was right. You knew he was, but you didn’t know how to proceed. “Maybe I can head out. Find someone that can gimme some answers.”
“No.” You answered immediately, your eyes wide with fear. “Daryl, you can’t tell anyone.”
“Why not?” He stared at you intently, never looking away even when you touched his cheek and he leaned into it. “What if I can help? If I’m immune, maybe we can get a cure or a vaccine.”
“I won’t have someone poking and prodding at you, fucking carving into you for answers. I won’t.” You snapped. You weren’t angry but you were serious. “Someone could hurt you, use you. They could kill you for answers, and I can’t watch that happen.”
“But if—”
“I give in on a lot of things, Daryl. I even stayed behind so you could come out here and handle your grief your own way.” His warm hand rested on your face so he could wipe away the moisture there. “Giving in, letting you always do things your way damn near cost me the most important thing in my life.”
“But—”
“Please, Daryl. If you do nothing else for me, please do this one thing.”
He studied you quietly, mulling over your words for an amount of time that had you building your resolve to continue your argument. “Okay.” You were able to breathe, not even realizing you were holding it.
“Thank you.”
“Some things gonna hafta change ‘til we know more.”
“I know.” You answered with only the slightest hint of regret. Physical intimacy would be out of the question, you knew for certain that’s what he meant. He wouldn’t risk you. However, if it kept him alive and in your arms, you’d make that trade without a second thought. “It’s okay.”
He nodded in agreement. “Ain’t gonna like not bein’ able to touch ya.”
You smiled and moved closer, pressing your forehead to his. “I can think of a few things we can still do.”
“Yeah?”
“Oh yeah.” You pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and laughed at the terrified expression when you pulled away. “We didn’t swap spit, it’s fine.”
“Oh. Right.” One side of his mouth twitched up.
“We really should talk to Carol. I think she may be on the verge of a stroke out there.” You rubbed your cheek against his.
“Long as she leaves her bow outside.”
#murda writes#daryl dixon#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon fanfiction#the walking dead#daryl dixon x y/n#daryl dixon fanfic#daryl dixon x you#daryl angst#daryl dixon angst#daryl x female reader#daryl x you#daryl x reader#daryl x y/n#daryl dixon walking dead#daryl dixon & carol peletier#daryl dixon the walking dead#the walking dead daryl#daryl#daryl fanfiction#twd daryl#daryl dixon drabbles#daryl dixon imagine#daryl dixon twd#daryl dixon x female reader#the walking dead daryl dixon#twd daryl dixon#Spotify
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Do u think Sonic has nightmares of the SA2 ending? do u think the s2 of Prime fall reinforced this fear or gave him some closure? the anxiety of shadow falling and Sonic not being there to catch him lingers? maybe that's why Sonic is very touch affectionative towards Shadow
It fuels my angst loving heart lmao.
That scene single handedly DESTROYED me. Along with all the fics and fanart that came right after it when that ep of S2 came out hsjshshshs. The parallels are so fuggin tragic, especially from Sonic pov.
This was someone he had met in little under 48 hours, or however long the span of SA2 was lol. He's someone who challenged him, someone who, sure, wasn't entirely a mobian hedgehog--but one nonetheless, a super powered one at that. Who went from threating to destroy the world for hurting him beyond Sonic's comprehension to defending it till his final breath beside him.
Sonic's return to the ark without him will never NOT bring me to tears (yes I'm a big baby sue me lmao), he's still holding his inhibitor ring like its the most precious thing in the now saved world.
His goodbye to him; his closure--his understanding that, that was it. Shadow was gone. I don't remember the time from SA2 until Hero's but it was sure to be a long damn time, only for Shadow to just, be alive. MAN IT HURTS LIKE SH-- (I have a headcanon Sonic got to keep the inhibitor ring when Rouge gives it him later, and he wore it under his glove cuff all this time.) You cannot tell me Shadow didn't have a major impact on Sonic's life come onnnnn. I completely agree with the nightmares headcanon btw, like you take a hero with a savior complex and give them a situation where they FAILED to save someone they love and your in for an ANGST FIELD DAY.
Prime Sonic is a lil different from the Sonic's we've been introduced too in the past. (No this is NOT a complaint I love him sm, all Sonic's are amazing to me that is a fact.) He's probably the most physically affectionate one outta all of them. We see him describe his relationship with Shadow as "complicated" lmao, and for anyone new to the Sonic Series watching it, they're basically just introduced as rivals that are so fucking BAD at communicating. But you can tell he cares about his friends, and he really cares about Shadow.
This is evident in his PANIC ATTACK, when Shadow gets knocked out while trying to enter one of the gateways and ends up almost falling into the void. And this is right after they were just at each others necks, fighting for the tech.
There is NO POSSIBLE WAY it's not supposed to be a parallel to SA2, and if this Sonic also went through the "Shadow fucking dies and loses his memories TM" there is also ZERO WAY he didn't get flashbacks while reaching out to save the only piece of home he had, but Shadow's more than that. He grounds Sonic throughout Prime, he keeps him focused, he CARES about him too. Even if he has trouble showing it.
When it was Shadow's turn to save Sonic when he was fading away. Like, I WAS DECEASED, I WAS SOBBING--- ahem, I was carefully analyzing the moment where we got to see Shadow return the favor. Where he was mere MOMENTS away from losing him. He was in Sonic's place, back in space near the Space Colony Ark. Holding the most precious part of his home. His friend. (HIS BOYFR-- *gets shot*)
I like to think they both get more affectionate and open with each other, it just works so naturally well in Prime because of everything they've been through. And how the show, shows their friendship develop over time, even when Shadow gets benched for the majority of it hjhghj. He lets Sonic in, he makes the effort to hear him out, they LEARN TO COMMUNICATE.
Sonic wants to be near Shadow, Shadow in turn lets him, lets him be affectionate. Because they both really DO realize how much they care and need/want each other in their lives. They make me ill.
#ask#anon ask#sonadow#sonic prime#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#another blu ramble hjgfshk#let them cuddle it out fr#fav
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g e n s o. - 1 5
its a short one yall
you watch him eat quietly before speaking out,
"so uh.. what time did you end the call yesterday night?" you fiddle with your earring, "when i woke up it said the call only lasted for an hour so.." you trail off glancing at him.
he swallows thickly, "it was nothing-"
you purse your lips, "your lying.." you look at him. "theres something your not saying.."
"fuck off genso. you dont need to know everything" he spat continuing to eat his food.
you widen your eyes, "w-well.. im sorry but- i want to know because out of everyone you chose to call me and actually get along with me yesterday, but for some damn reason today you wanna act like an ass and ignore me!" you exclaim.
"you did this to me before we even came to UA..! you- you made me promise you to make it to UA so we could be friends again and you just-" you tear up frustrated.
he glances at you quietly before placing his plate down. "dont cry- dammit.." you grunts, running a hand through his untamed hair.
you wipe your tears before they fall, "im not-" you say defensively as you glance the other way.
"genso i-" he starts, "look i didnt go to school today because i was up all night thinking of something- or well someone.." he explains, avoiding eye contact with you.
you widen your eyes, "oh."
should you be feeling... hurt? why did it sting when he said he was thinking of someone? was this normal?
"who..?" you ask, your throat suddenly becoming dry.
he glances up at you before turning back down to his food. "i-" he croaks.
"i dont think she deserves to have someone like me.." he responds. you swear you see his eyes tear up, but dont question it.
"oh kats- bakugou-" you start.
"call me katsuki, not bakugou. weve known each other far too long for you to call me my surname." he mumbles.
"well what happened to that after i finished middle school" you mumble a bit harshly. you turn away from him lowly.
"genso. i didnt want distractions- i had to make it in for u-" he stops abruptly as he admits it.
you widen you eyes and snap your head to him. "for me..?" you ask softly. he grumbles nodding slightly, "oh.. well- even if you meant no harm, you couldve said something you know? it really sucked if im being honest..." you admit rubbing your arm.
"i know.. i kinda fucked up the execution.." he chuckles.
you nod, "yea.." you say agreeing with a small smile, "but uh- ill call you katsuki i guess.. i can understand why you did it.. i kinda got into UA for our promise too.." you admit quietly.
he cant help but smirk slightly, "oh?"
you smack his arm, "hush- now tell me who the girl is" u say with a tiny smile.
he curses lowly staring at the food before placing it down and turning to you. you adjust to face him too.
"oh for fucks sake.." he pauses, "genso- no- y/n... i-" he tears up.
you widen your eyes. he called you by your actual name.
"y/n.. i dont know how to tell you this- and this may come off as forward or quick but, i fucking cant stop thinking about you." he says blinking his eyes causing tears to roll down.
"i dont know what to do anymore because it physically hurts me to think of you a-and- im scared you hate me. i feel like you deserve someone so much better then me-" he sobs slightly.
your heart lurches at the sight and suddenly you wrap your arms around his shoulders, bringing him close to your chest. "dont." you say softly, cutting him off.
his body shakes against yours as he buries his face in your neck. you rub his back softly, "katsuki.. weve been friends since we were in kindergarten.. yes, we have had our rough patches, but who doesnt?"
you pause bringing his face up and wiping his tears, "i dont hate you, if anything i like you so much it frustrates me." you admit.
he looks up at you, "really..?"
you nod, "really. how can i hate my best friend..?" you ask softly with a small smile.
he grabs your hands that are on his face and bring them down to press a soft kiss on the palm of your hand. "promise?" he mumbles into your hand.
you chuckle,
"promise katsuki.."
previous parts: pt. 0 0 / pt. 0 1 / pt. 02 / pt. 03 / pt. 04 / pt. 05 / pt. 06 / pt. 07 / pt. 08 / pt. 09 / pt. 10 / pt. 11 / pt. 12 / pt. 13 / pt. 14 next part: pt. 16
☆taglist! @katszumi @coolgirl458 @niktwazny303 @twinnintwink @froggybich @friedmagazineprincess @itztaki
#mha#bakugo katsuki#my hero academia#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugou#kacchan#kacchan bakugou#katsuki bakugo mha#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugou#katsuki bakugo#mha bakugou#katsuki#bnha bakugo katsuki#bakugo#bakugo katuski#bakugou x you#katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#bakugou x y/n#katsuki x y/n#mha fanfiction#mha x reader#my hero acedamia#boku no hero academia#t3ag3rs
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