#it’s the inevitable friends to lovers but one of them being scared to pursue a relationship

[preoccupied-educator]

once again thinking about reckless driving as a juke song

really just over here living my best life, rotating my blorbos to music in my head 😌

[tenthgrove]

Soft Yandere Tizano and squalo

Yandere La Unita

Content Warnings: yandere behaviour, manipulation, abduction, forced dependency, violence, unhealthy relationships, the general existence of Dolcio Cioccolata.

Squalo and Tiziano

It isn't common for Squalo and Tiziano to interact with civilians. Or anyone really, since the pair are largely content with each other's company and nothing more. The sole exception to this is the necessary interactions that result from their frequent shopping trips, from which you, the cashier of their favourite boutique, came into play.

The pair observed you innocuously for many months, slowly learning practically everything that could be known about you simply from overheard conversations with colleagues. You dare say you liked them, even, as they were friendlier than your average customer and a familiar face to look forward too.

One day, Squalo sits Tiziano down and admits his attraction to you. It was meant to be an honourable confession, an honest admittance of wrongdoing to ensure no harm comes to the relationship. To Squalo's shock, Tiziano chuckles and announces he feels the same way. It's time the couple started to pursue you actively.

The defining feature of how Squalo and Tiziano obtain you is that it's calculated and smart. Squalo's happy to just walk up to you and ask for you to be together (or barring that, just abduct you), but it is Tiziano who convinces him otherwise. Not only would conventional methods of wooing you be unlikely to work, but they have practical concerns to worry about as well, being high-ranking members of the mafia. They're going to have to plan something a little more nuanced.

During a visit to your store, Squalo slips a little bit of paper into your pocket. You open it at home that evening to find your own address, along with several belonging to your closest friends and family listed out, above a message instructing you to come to a location of their choice the next day or they'll start paying these people visits. It's an outdoor restaurant in the middle of the city, where there's bound to be a lot of people. They don't want to scare you too much after all.

You arrive at the restaurant the next day on weak knees. Squalo and Tiziano thank you for coming, before introducing themselves in no uncertain terms as mafiosos who have taken an interest in you, and would like to start dating. You read between the lines that you don't have an option to say no.

However, the pair make clear the incentives to accept their offer are just as profound as the threats against refusing it. Are you in education? They're happy to support you in continuing it. Do you work? They have more than enough money to support you in reducing your hours or, if it's something you genuinely enjoy, bribing the right people to advance your career. Ultimately, Squalo and Tiziano know the carrot is just as important as the stick.

Thought you aren't forced to go home with them there and then, it soon becomes clear you're expected to sort your affairs quickly and move in within the next couple of months. From that point on, the couple will treat you as though you've been together for years, expecting you to address them as your partners as well.

Both Squalo and Tiziano are very touchy in their own ways, and while they would never force themselves on you, are more than happy to trail their hands up and down your arms early on. They are also both incredibly teasing, and will pick up on all your reactions.

The good news is that the level of freedom afforded to you is high from the get-go. Even from the beginning, you're allowed to maintain control of your finances and go out by yourself provided you tell them. Just be warned they'll occasionally check in on you by surprise to make sure you're actually where you said you would go. The one thing they do quite heavily police is social visits. The possibility of you revealing to someone they forced you to be with them is very acute, not that you would get very far if you did try to run away. It's not that you can't have friends, you just need to be very honest about who you're meeting and why.

Cioccolata and Secco

If Dolcio Cioccolata has taken an interest in you and his intentions aren't torture or murder, it can only mean one thing- you are someone very dear to him, and have been so for a long time. Chances are, you probably trust him a lot back. Cioccolata's gotten very good at acting normal around his respectable friends, after all.

The two main possibilities are that you know him as a family friend and became close through parties, or you're a chronically ill patient who found yourself in his care, and were lucky enough to avoid his scalpel long enough for a genuine mutual bond to form. It could be both. You could have fallen ill after knowing him for a long time. He could have made you ill.

As for Secco, Cioccolata will only pursue you as a lover with his consent. Cioccolata would never want his darling pet to feel neglected, after all, and for that reason it's only when Secco confesses a fondness for you that Cioccolata decides its time to make you his own. Secco is immediately very excited at the thought of you joining them, and for a while Cioccolata's main concern is actually stopping him from giving their plans away.

As much as Cioccolata would love to pluck you from your home, he knows that would only get him caught. The police are already after a serial killer with surgical knowledge, and taking you like that would just make him a suspect. So he does something more covert, he invites you over. You enjoy a lovely night gorging snacks and watching TV with your two friends, until Cioccolata invites you to the basement. As you go down, he snatches your phone and sends out the first of many messages designed to trick your family into thinking you've run away.

Waiting for you there in the basement, to your horror, is a functional operating theatre, complete with spatter after spatter of blood. You'll probably try to run, but the door is already locked. But don't worry, your blood won't be joining that on the table tonight. As Cioccolata explains to you as you cower in the corner, he treasures your bond very much, the tender feeling of what they call 'romance' that fills his heart whenever you look at him, the obscure sense of care for another human being. He won't be subjecting you to his operations.

That is, until your inevitable first attempt at escape. Although he'll still stop short of outright torturing you (providing a generous dose of general anaesthetic and subsequent painkillers) his 'alterations' to your limbs will lead you unable to walk or carry out fine motor skills. You'll be entirely dependent on his and Secco's care. As he assures you frequently, the changes are entirely reversible and you can have all your old mobility back with another operation and a little physical therapy, but for Cioccolata to give that to you, you're going to have to earn it.

Cioccolata keeps his promise to reverse the damage he did to you, but by the time that happens a lot has changed. He hasn't conditioned you to become like Secco as that would involve removing everything that first endeared him to you, but you're still going to have to become a lot more warmed up to him to trust you with your limbs back. At least you'll be treated like royalty in the meantime, even if you are still a prisoner. Cioccolata will remind you every day you're his darling pet, just like Secco.

Doppio

Doppio was never allowed to have lovers when the Boss was around. He found it a little hypocritical since the boss once told him he had a girlfriend, but he guessed he understood his reasoning and, either way, he would never question his boss. The boss is gone now, and Doppio has nobody to guide him anymore. He's alone and doesn't know what to do; even the old hideouts the new boss never found feel cold and empty, and Doppio can't bring himself to enter them. Then he met you.

You weren't quite sure what you were looking at, seeing a fine-dressed, disoriented boy stumbling around in the rain outside your window. Nonetheless, you knew he was in no state to be alone so you went out and approached him. When it was clear he had nobody to call, you invited him in.

As you leave him alone in the sitting room to make coffee, Doppio's mind is going in cartwheels. You've been so kind to him, and deep down in his heart something tells him the two of you were meant for each other. This could be his new start! Someone to rely on, to depend upon to give him purpose! But wait- if he leaves tonight he might never see you again! As he panics, Doppio decides he can't let that happen. He needs to have you tonight.

The second you return to the sitting room, Doppio pounces on you. As he frantically assures you that everything's going to be okay, you pass out from shock. You wake up in a strange house, tied to an extravagant bed. Your screams bring Doppio to your room. He quickly reassures you he isn't going to hurt you and is doing this so you can be together.

Doppio has some (i.e, a few million quid) money he was able to salvage from before the boss' fall, and he's going to use it however possible to please you. He will buy you anything and everything you desire short of freedom, making his own guesses about what you'd like if you refuse to talk.

His initial plan is to keep you locked up in that room (or at very least the wider house) forever, since it's safest for you and his old boss never went out much, but eventually he relents at your distress. He'll let you out eventually, if that's what it takes to make you smile.

On that note, the best thing about being Doppio's darling is how easy it is to turn the tables on him. Once you've behaved yourself for a while, having learned what keeps Doppio satisfied, it's very easy to become the dominant one in the relationship and make him let you do whatever you want. His sole desire is to serve you, after all.

[geminisholland]

i’m covered in you Tom Holland x actress!reader

a/n: whew i had fun with this!! i loved writing this so much! also, if you like star wars and want to give my other blog some love @makerkenobi i would appreciate that!! references to my fave song, ivy by miss swift

requests are open

warnings: cussing, angst, and a whole lotta fluff

word count: 2174

join my taglist!

bold and italics are text messages

italics are song lyrics

The hours spent on set between you and Tom had inevitably created a close bond for the two of you. There were many sleepless nights together, running scenes for hours on end before the director finally shot one they liked. You were each other’s rock during the whole process, Tom made a point to come over to your trailer before a particularly difficult scene, and provide support. You were newer to acting, and Tom helped guide you and give you advice during filming. It was safe to say that Tom was your best friend, and you were his. However, playing lovers on screen and having that chemistry was difficult for you to ignore. You knew that deep down, you had feelings for Tom, you just decided from the very beginning that you couldn’t pursue him. You wanted to make sure you established yourself as a professional, which you are.

You were professional for the entire filming process, never having a night where you drank too much and kissed him. Never. You were quite proud of that, because there were many opportunities where you could have. Tom was hard to read, anyways. You never knew how he was feeling, one minute he’d talk about some girl he likes, and the next he’s going on about how he just wants to stay single right now.

The press tour for this movie was coming along in just a few days, and you were doing your best to prepare. Mentally, that is. The press tour was going to have a lot of bonding time. Interviewers asking you questions every day, all day. Sitting next to Tom for hours on end just talking about each other and the movie. Being only a hotel room away from him. Celebrating the movie coming out with trips down to the hotel bar at midnight, you knew this was dangerous.

A ding from your phone made you snap out of your daze, as you picked it up to look at it.

Tom: Are you excited for the press tour or whattt

You: haha yesss i’m so excited & also kinda nervous?? idk why

Tom: I have that affect on people

You: shut up

You: it’s effect btw

Tom: No it isn’t

You: uhhh... yes it is dumbass

Tom: Shut up

Tom: I’ll see you in a few days in the best city ever

You: you’re only saying it’s the best city because it’s your city

Tom: Ya that’s why it’s the best

You: you’re so annoying i’ll see you soon

With that, you locked your phone, and resumed packing. You really only needed to pack pajamas and workout clothes, because all your outfits for the press tour were being brought in by your stylist. You really couldn’t complain about any of this, you got to play dress up for a month or so, hang out with Tom, and talk about a movie you’re really proud of. Oh, and also travel across the world. That part was pretty cool.

You flew into London a day early so you would have time to adjust to the time difference. Tom was kind enough to invite you to stay the night at his house before the two of you left for hotel rooms every night.

When you arrived, you were extremely tied, and didn’t have the energy to hang out with Tom’s entire family, and his roommates.

“Hey everyone,” You said as you walked into his house. Tom was behind you, carrying one of your bags.

“It’s so heavy,” He groaned out, and you rolled your eyes at him. He was never very subtle about what was on his mind.

“Hey y/n!” Harry called out. “We missed you!”

You looked around the room to see just about everyone that Tom knows sitting in his living room. You weren’t expecting to be met with at least ten people, right after you got off of a ten hour flight.

“Oh... hey!” You let out, your eyes were wide with shock. You were really tired, but didn’t want to be rude. “How is everyone?”

You made your way around, saying hello to everyone, as Tom put away your luggage in the guest room. He came downstairs, and you turned around to look at him. He had the biggest smile on his face, he loved seeing you with everyone. Of course, you had already met and hung out with his family and friends, but you were special to him; which means you getting along with his family and friends was really important to him.

“Hey, Tom,” You said. “Can we talk real quick?”

“Of course, darling,” He responded. You grabbed his arm, leading him out to the backyard so you could talk in private.

“That was really nice of you to have everyone here,” You acknowledged. You looked up at him as he flashed you a grin. He was overflowing with excitement, it had been a few months since you last saw each other in person.

“Everyone missed you,” He explained. “Myself included.”

“I missed you too, Tom.” You looked up at him, your arms were still interlocked together as you stood on the gravel, overlooking his backyard.

“I don’t want to be rude,” You started. He furrowed his brows as you continued, “But I’m really exhausted, and I think I need to just take a little nap. Can everyone come back for dinner?”

“Oh, of course!” He exclaimed. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t even thinking- I was just so excited you were coming, and everyone else was too I ju-“

“Tom, it’s okay,” You smiled at him. He relaxed as your eyes met. “I’m really appreciative, Thank you for doing this. I just need some sleep right now.”

“Of course,” He nodded. The two of you went back inside, and Tom had asked everyone to come back later to give you some time to unwind. You walked into the guest room he had made for you, and laid down on the bed, not bothering to get under the covers as you drifted off to sleep.

Having dinner with everyone later was extremely fun, and you were feeling like yourself again. The entire stay at Tom’s house was incredible, the two of you messed around a lot, but at the end of the day he was really a great friend. The morning you two were getting ready to leave for the press tour, he brought up tea to your room. It was the little things, you thought.

That day consisted of driving to the hotel, getting ready for interviews, and talking a lot about the movie. The two of you ended up in the hotel bar later that night, starting off the press tour by getting drunk. There were multiple days of this; you went from England, to France, to Germany, Spain, everywhere. You and Tom were having so much fun, all you did was talk in interviews, eat good food, sightsee, and get drunk. It was magical, actually. But everything changed when you went to Italy.

“We have Y/N Y/L/N and Tom Holland here, promoting their new movie,” The interviewer spoke into the camera. You and Tom sat beside each other, smiling as they continued to talk and ask questions.

“Was this movie more difficult to film, Tom? Because of how dark it is?” She asked, and Tom nodded his head.

“Oh, definitely,” He began. “I had a hard time with scenes, but luckily I have an amazing costar who helped me out with them.” He placed his hand on your shoulder as he looked over at you.

“And you, y/n?” She started. “It was also difficult?”

You nodded your head, “It’s definitely something I’ve never done before.” All three of you laughed before you continued. “Yeah, it was very difficult, actually. I’m very lucky Tom was there, there were a lot of tears- on and off screen!”

The three of you let out a laugh again, and Tom took his hand off your shoulder, and it fell onto your lower back. You gave him a quick look before the interviewer continued to ask questions.

“Because this movie is so dark, I thought it would be fun to ask some fun, lighthearted questions!”

You and Tom nodded, and she started to begin.

“What are you favorite colors?”

“Blue,” You let out.

“Green,” Tom responded.

The questions kept coming, and you and Tom were having a lot of fun with them. It was something different, and you liked that. Then, she asked the question that changed everything.

“What song reminds you of the other person?” She asked. You and Tom looked at each other, thrown off by what was just asked.

“Uhh,” Tom started. “I think I’d have to say Mr. Blue Sky by Electric Light Orchestra.”

You laughed, knowing why he said this.

“We had a lot of dance parties in the hair and makeup trailer to this song,” Tom answered. You nodded your head.

“And you, y/n, what song reminds you of Tom?”

You hesitated, you knew what song he reminded you of, you just were scared to say it out loud.

“Umm,” You drifted off. Tom stared at you, waiting for your answer. “I don’t know why, but my brain is saying ‘Ivy’ by Taylor Swift.”

You and Tom looked at each other, he looked confused; raising an eyebrow to indicate his confusion. The interviewer cleared her throat, then changed the subject. You spent the whole interview on edge, Tom kept giving you the side eye, and you knew you were going to have a conversation about it after.

Except after wasn’t until much later, you had at least three more interviews to do that day. When this interview ended, you didn’t have any time to chat with him. Your makeup artists rushed over to do touch-ups before the next interviewer walked in.

You were in agony, you wanted so badly to talk to him about this, but the two of you had no time alone. You were doing your best to not look at him, you couldn’t make eye contact right now.

Finally, you wrapped up the interviews for the day, and you and Tom started heading to your hotel rooms.

“What was that?” He asked, breaking the awkward silence as you walked back to you rooms.

“What was what?” You played dumb, but still looked at the ground.

“Look at me,” He demanded. You looked up at him, he was taller than you, and you were already in a vulnerable position. “You told me that ‘Ivy’ was a song that made you feel like you were in love, do you not remember that? You said that when we were filming.”

“I remember.”

“Then what the fuck was that?”

You breathed in, your heart was racing and you started to sweat. You were growing anxious. You looked behind him to see your hotel room number, you were hoping you could escape this. Maybe this wasn’t healthy, you thought. Running away from your problems. You just couldn’t handle him saying anything other than that he feels the same for you. You tried to move forward, but he blocked you.

“Don’t run away from me,” He growled out.

“Fine,” You said. “What do you want me to say?”

“What you meant,” Tom responded. He started to back up, so he was against the wall right next to your hotel door. You stood across from him, on the other side of the door.

“What I meant,” You were stalling. He stared at you, waiting for you to response.

You couldn’t look away, though.

So yeah, it’s a fire, it’s a goddamn blaze in the dark and you started it. You started it.

Your eyes met each other, and you started to moved your way closer to him. He started walking towards you, your bodies inches apart.

So yeah, it’s a war, it’s the goddamn fight of my life and you started it. You started it.

You would do anything for him, anything. He breathed out, and you felt his breath on your face.

“I love you,” You whispered. You nodded your head, looking down at the ground. You couldn’t even look him in the face. He grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at him. He had a smile on his face.

“Oh, y/n, I love you too,” He said. You laughed, but was abruptly cut off by him smashing his lips into yours. You brought one hand to his neck, the other to your back pocket, trying to find the hotel room key. You stumbled, Tom was closing in on you. There was no space left between your bodies, and you were on fire. His hands were in your hair, and he was pushing you up against the wall. You giggled, you were struggling to put the key into the slot of the door, but Tom ripped it out of your hands and shoved it in the slot. He opened the door, then picked you up, taking you into your hotel room.

Now I’m covered in you.

taglist:

@white-wolf1940 @holyfrickfracks @stylessugarhigh @lilhoodhippie @lowkey-holland @lmaotshollandd @thehumanistsdiary @tomshufflepuff @zspideyy @lovely-blackinnon @hollandfanficlove @minejungwoo @th45

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Ambiguous/Open Ending Masterlist

A Kiss Before Bed (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: When the Earth is set to be dust and ash, there's no point in things being left unsaid.

Or, an asteroid may just be the catalyst for something that's been brewing for a long time.

Bored (ao3) - Lizzyboo

Summary: it's 2012 and Phil is getting tired of the way Dan has been treating him lately.

But They Say We're Made of Stardust (ao3) - cactuslester

Summary: 3000 years into the future, Dan and Phil meet as kids still in primary school. They follow a journey of becoming best friends to eventually falling in love and trying to navigate through the ups and downs life throws at them: secrets, bad teachers, intergalactic war, the usual.

Dan Howell is so Undeniably Screwed (ao3) - Paganarchist

Summary: to Dan, Phil was always "that scary guy who doesn't talk," and nothing more or less. Phil becomes Dan's worst nightmare the day he finds out Phil just got a job hosting at his family's restaurant. Dan's convinced he's not gonna survive the day without bruises, but he's been wrong before.

don't be afraid, just believe (ao3) - TsingaDark

Summary: There was a rumour on campus that someone had died in the East Wing and had been haunting it ever since. Dan, for his part, thought it was utter crap. Even if someone had died there - which he highly doubted - they would not be haunting that place because ghosts didn't even exist.

ivy (ao3) - waveydnp

Summary: dan sees someone he used to know

Love Will Remember (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: “Let’s test ourselves - just once. If we really are each other’s 100% perfect lovers, then sometime, somewhere, we will meet again without fail. And when that happens, and we know that we are the 100% perfect ones, we’ll marry then and there. What do you think?” - Haruki Murakami.

(Or, in which Dan and Phil are soulmates but sometimes the stars just don’t align the way you think they should).

oh no (not now) (ao3) - kishere

Summary: It's the year 2013 and Phil, an omega, has an okay enough life. He's recently moved to London to pursue an opportunity to work for BBC Radio 1, he has a new flat, and his YouTube channel has been on an upswing. Sure, his heats are so inconsistent he finally had to ask his fiancé of five years, Dan, to help him through them so he could try and live a normal life. Which wouldn't be such an issue if Dan wasn't in love with Phil's hotter, tattooed twin, Dillon...

Sometimes we just need a little love and affection to show us the world isn't all bad (ao3) - winstonlives

Summary: The boys encounter a hate fueled man and Dan has a hard time coping. Phil helps him the best way he can.

the rain (ao3) - dizzy, waveydnp

Summary: dan and phil meet at a festival. then the rain comes.

The type that sticks around (ao3) - jestbee

Summary: Dan will take what he can get

Treat Me Gently (ao3) - Leswell

Summary: An university student who's mastering as a pianist, Dan Howell, is out of the money to pay his next semester's tuition and there is Phil Lester, a CEO of famous company, who offers Dan 'special job'.

unequivocally yours (ao3) lyricallyharley

Summary: dan has many fears, his biggest one being the supernatural. how can he be scared of something he doesn’t believe in? and where do fears actually come from?

We Make Our Own (ao3) - queerofcups

Summary: Dan’s Name stretches from the outer edge of his shoulder, across his clavicle and stops just above his heart.

It’s not Phil’s name. Never has been. Never will be.

while our blood's still young (ao3) - celestialfics (orphan_account)

Summary: In the midst of 1950s America, Phil works at a malt shop that Dan frequents after school. Inevitably as their relationship progresses, the two boys face unrelenting adversity in a world that does not yet see all love as equal.

[vs-redemption]

From Cindy: This was written for a Secret Santa event on a Discord Server I’m in. ( @konoblog-simps ) I got permission from the giftee to post this, so I wanted to share it with all of you Bokuto lovers!!!

Perfect Day (Bokuto x Fem!Reader)

If there was anything better than a balmy summer day at the beach, it would be spending that perfect day with your best friend, Kotaro Bokuto. The enthusiastic, lovable guy had been close with you ever since your first year in High School when you’d volunteered to tutor him in a few of his weaker subjects. You could still remember the day you’d overheard your teacher telling him that he’d be forced to take some time away from playing volleyball for the school team if he couldn’t get his grades back up. At first, the thought of helping him never even crossed your mind. He was just a random classmate that you’d never spoken to before, so you didn’t have any personal feelings invested.

There was no way for you to ignore his struggle over the next few days though. You’d never realized how much life and energy he’d brought to your class until the pressure of his grades transformed him into a sad looking puppy dog, slumped over his desk as he tried his best to write down and understand whatever your teacher was lecturing about. His moping was really killing the overall mood of the class. You also noticed that he started staying after school to get help from his volleyball teammates, who were quite hard on him at times. You got the distinct impression that he was an extremely valuable member of the club, and a part of you started to take pity on him. If it were you in that situation, you’d be just as upset if the school was threatening to ban you from participating in club activities.

“So, what subjects do you need help on?” You approach him after school one day after his friends left him to go to practice. You set your school bag down and pull an extra chair up to his desk. Bokuto was a pretty tall and muscular guy, but the way he perked up with his big golden eyes all wide in disbelief was extremely adorable.

“Thanks for offering,” he gives you an appreciative smile, “But I’d feel bad taking up your time. I know you’re on the swim team.” Bokuto had seemed to have a one track mind for volleyball, so it was a bit surprising that he knew which club you were in.

“We don’t practice as much as the volleyball team,” you tell him before pointing to the stack of books on his desk. “Which subject do you want to start with?”

You learned right away that Bokuto was a pretty emotional person, which made keeping him focused and motivated a whole job in itself. He got discouraged easily over difficult problems, but bounced back just as fast once something clicked and he managed to answer a question correctly. With your help, his grades improved just enough to be passable. But more importantly, you and Bokuto inevitably grew to be friends after spending so much time together. Since you had invested so much time in his success, Bokuto began to invite you to his games and would even show up to attend your swim meets sometimes to cheer you on. Over time, you started hanging out on weekends to do stuff outside of school activities, and eventually he just became a regular and important part of your life.

After graduating high school, you both managed to stay close despite having very different life and college schedules. Bokuto had been recruited by a fairly prestigious volleyball college team and moved out of town while you pursued a more academic route for your future. You both stayed in contact though and visited each other whenever there was time. You lived for the days he would video call you after his volleyball games to brag about all the awesome points he’d scored. Those calls always ended with you holding back giggles as his teammates poked their heads in to correct his exaggerations. In quieter times, you’d spend hours on the phone telling him about your teachers and coursework. He hardly ever had any helpful feedback or advice, but he still loved hearing your voice and was happy to know you were doing well. Of course, you wished you could see him more, but you made sure to make the most of the times you could spend with him, especially during long holiday breaks.

“Hey hey hey!!!!” Bokuto thrusts his fists into the air after slamming the volleyball into the sand on the other side of the net with unnecessary force. The group of college kids who had invited you both to join in their game looked to be regretting that decision now, even the ones playing on your team.

“Okay Mister ‘Best ace in the country.’ You don’t have to show off that much.” You tell him with a laugh, “This isn’t a professional game. Nobody’s going to want to play with you again if they’re scared of you.” Bokuto wasn’t worried about the random people standing on the other side of the net though. He was still celebrating the point he’d just earned with that last spike.

“You weren’t kidding when you said he was good,” one of your opponents picks up the ball and tosses it back over the net. “It’s match point now.”

“Your serve!” Bokuto flashes a wide grin and gives you a thumbs up, “don’t forget to hit the ball the way I showed you earlier.”

“Just don’t judge me if it doesn’t go over,” you shake your head while holding the ball out in front of you and toss it in the air. Thankfully, the ball clears the net and a girl on the other side manages to keep it in the air and pass it to one of her teammates.

“It’s coming back over!” One of the people on your side calls out and gets ready to receive the ball.

“Send it over here!” Bokuto calls for the shot once again. The people you were playing with didn’t have the skills he was used to though and the aim was way off. The ball comes straight to you and you put your hands over your head, hoping you’d have better luck sending it to your friend who had that crazy, hungry look in his eyes. He was always so passionate about volleyball, even in a casual setting like this.

The ball touches your hands and you bump it back up into a smooth arc right towards Bokuto who had his tongue sticking out of the side of his mouth adorably. He runs and jumps at the ball before slamming it down on the other side, where a few people even flinched away. Bokuto doesn’t even wait for anyone to call the match before throwing his fists up in victory again.

“Yeah!” He turns and practically charges at you with his hands up above his head.

“Whoa! Wait!” You put your hands up and close your eyes, hoping he wouldn’t use too much force. He surprises you though by just opening his arms and wrapping them around you in a tight hug. The college kids thank you for playing, but look slightly relieved when you suggest to Bokuto that you both cool off by going for a swim.

Being in the water meant it was your time to shine, and you couldn’t help but laugh at Bokuto who insisted on wearing blow up floaties on his arms. After you were both tired out, you head back onto the beach to spread out the blanket you’d brought and pull the food out of the cooler which you’d prepared beforehand.

“Ah!” Bokuto sighs and flops back on the blanket once he finishes eating. “I don’t want today to end.” You smile at his words and lay down next to him to look up at the clouds drifting by overhead.

“Liar,” you reply with a teasing tone in your voice. “You can hardly wait to return to school and get back to practicing for that upcoming tournament you’ve barely shut up about this whole vacation.”

“Yeah,” Bokuto turns his head to look at you with a frown. “But it’d be better if I could take you back with me. I always feel so sad when we say goodbye.”

“I know,” you reach over and pat his hand, feeling amused that after all this time he still wore his heart on his sleeve. “I don’t like having my best friend so far away either, but I’m proud of you for working so hard and doing what makes you happy every day.” The praise gives Bokuto a little bit of his spunk back and he looks back up with a grin on his face.

“Once we’re both done with school, we’ll never spend so much time apart,” he declares suddenly.

“I’m pretty sure you’ll have even less time then,” you point out, the more logical part of your brain kept you from joining in the fantasy. “You’ll join a professional team and travel around the country playing against other strong teams.”

“Then I’ll bring you with me,” he says as if that were obvious. “It won’t be any fun otherwise.”

“That’s sweet,” you can’t help but feel a little emotional knowing that you meant so much to him and his happiness. You had no idea how serious he was or if it would even be possible since you’d have a career of your own, but it was a nice thought nonetheless. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Once the sun started to set, you and Bokuto knew it was time to start packing up your things and head home. It was a bittersweet feeling knowing that your summer break was almost over and that Bokuto would be leaving soon. You’d had so much fun together, and you couldn’t help but wonder what the future had in store for the two of you. There was one thing you did know for certain though, and it was that you’d be more than content spending perfect days like this one with Bokuto for the rest of your life.

[sinnhelmingr]

an list of favorite shipping tropes bc it’s all downhill from here. long post plz don’t just read more it’ll stretch your dash ;A;

their aesthetics seem completely at odds for any sort of romantic dynamic, but the two have backstory that puts one at the mercy of another, where the other shows (often uncharacteristic) mercy in turn.

they met on a battlefield.

false identities. namely one half of the ship keeping the other’s old identity/self a secret between the two of them.

‘i worship(ed) you.’

one half of the ship calling the other ‘my sin’ based on either what they did to the other in the past or what their sparing the other meant to the world at large.

any cyclical motif in their interactions.

being enemies but not antagonists for a time, even if only one half is aware.

intimacy through battle.

‘you are the only one that could ever make me happy.’ implying one of them can be whole in every way but not fulfilled without the other.

breaking up but drifting back together after time to find themselves independent of each other.

babies ever after, or any sort of inclusion of ship babies in a narrative

not love ‘fixing’ a villainous or morally problematic character based on their love interest trying to actively change them, but because that villain’s love for someone else motivates them to re-examine themselves and their actions.

alternatively, a character that has been dancing with grey morality, especially against equally grey protagonists, diving into outright villainy because a villainous romantic interest treats them with more respect or awe than their heroic peers.

actually requited pining that is presented as unrequited due to mixed signals or larger plot machinations

the gentle inevitability of childhood best friends to lovers, presented in such a way that it’s only natural for the characters involved

whether as part of the above or independent of it, running away together. be it from one’s problems or towards freedom or just to see where life takes them, two (or more) people taking off together.

mentorshipping, so long as both participants are adults and there’s no further dynamic imbalance. just two people falling in love while learning about a subject, especially if the student can offer some perspective that makes the mentor really stop and think.

the inscrutable unknowable ‘weird’ one and the anxious ‘hi i’m new in town’ cracking up one, where the weird one takes the struggling one under their wing and helps them out when they need it.

polyamory where an existing arrangement falls for the same person and invites them into the fold w love and affection.

‘our girlfriend, pal.’ kinds of polyamory except everyone is cool with the arrangement, even if there’s only one shared partner in question

slinky speed-based monster type with the huge hulking melee built monster type.

human dates monster/god/generally powerful being. human is the one to be scared of.

exes who get along and support one another in their current romantic pursuits

the himbo/herbo falls for the dour and serious one. exasperated slow burn ensues.

ghostshipping, whether in the case of a partner having passed and their other half staying loyal to their memory in spite of their absence from the active narrative, a partner having passed and literally returned as a ghost, literally falling in love with someone who died before you met them but is still hanging around, or staying loyal to the memory of who a loved one was before some major event that ‘killed’ who they had been.

team dad/team mom. especially if the two roles are fulfilled by characters of the same gender, good for my dyke soul.

team mom/team joker.

sun/moon dichotomy.

shipping that plays with darkness motifs, be it in powers, aesthetics, or even shipping deities over different ‘dark’ domains.

reincarnation/25 lives but especially if it involves an immortal.

villain and the greater villain pulling their strings. especially if the greater evil is playing like they’re a loyal servant of the current primary antagonist, be it simply as a pawn or in more overt displays of submission.

someone who is too afraid or traumatized to be touched and the only one whose hands don’t fill them with revulsion.

religious implications in either pet names, inner thoughts, or intentionally invoked in how one partner treats the other as divine.

the loser character endures all indignities or degradation from those around them because at the end of the day they know they’ve won, because they are so loved and cherished by the only person that matters to them.

the two cold and reserved characters are deeply and affectionately in love where others can’t see.

the dark lady and the radiant prince/princess who still pursues them, steadfastly prevailing over any trial or suffering to prove their devotion.

the warrior woman and her appreciative noble lady.

the ‘i have nothing to give you’ breakdown where the other half of the ship assures them.

the feral one and the repressed one.

[league-of-thots]

Masks: A Soulmate AU

Pairing: Nejire x reader

Warnings: minor drugs/alcohol reference

Word Count: 4.5k

A/N: the prompt for this discord collab was a sfw soulmate au

masterlist

You were 16 years old, like everyone else, when you opened the box that had appeared at the bottom of your bed. Inside, laying on golden straw, was the mask that the fates had given to you to help you find your destined partner.

The night before, you’d been so excited, tossing and turning all throughout the night, sleeping short bursts and then waking for a few minutes before inevitably passing back out again. The whole night you’d had weird dreams that were both surreal yet vivid in their detail, confusing and disorienting you. During the dreams you could only imagine chasing after this one swan who was always moving along from one thing to another. At one time, it was floating down a river but stopped to go see a dam on the other side of the river. You could only watch as it looked around, observing and carefully taking stock of the surroundings, before it was jolted into action seeing some small animals run by. It flew away and the dream shifted and soon enough you were running after it again…

Opening the box, you felt yourself shudder unconsciously, your heart felt warmer than it had just moments ago and you wondered if your partner had already received their mask or was waiting patiently just as you had been for the past few years. Wonder, curiosity and excitement were all warring for your attention as you looked onto the beautiful creation in front of you, it truly was a gift from the fates.

The mask was covered your forehead to just under your cheekbones, leaving perfectly shaped holes for your eyes to see. It was a beautiful platinum, looking silver-blue in the light of the morning streaming through your window. All across the bottom lining were alternating triangular holes and slightly above that were complicated swirling patterns. There were small white gems places at the ends of swirling branches, making them look as if they were pale roses growing out from vines.

You lightly ran your fingers over the smooth metal, the mask oddly light considering the amount of surface area it had. Along the top were feather designs stitched in, their shape matching those of the swan who you’d dreamt about.

You sat there for a few minutes, staring down at the mask and touching it almost reverently. Somewhere out there, was a perfect match for it, and with such a pretty mask, you knew they would be special, you could feel it in your bones. Soon you’d put it on, and wouldn’t be able to take it off until you found that partner meant for you. It both scared and excited you to know that one day you’d find them, and hoped desperately that the two of you would like each other and fall in love. Soulmates didn’t have to be romantic, but you were a bit of a sap, and having a partner destined for you? It would lift your heart up if they’d be your significant other.

You placed the mask on your face, and felt the mask magically adjust to your face, locking itself into place after a few slow minutes of adjustment. The metal was a nice cool touch to your face, and you closed your eyes feeling it slowly shift on your face. You wanted to remember how it felt, knowing that it would one day change your life. When it was done, you looked in the mirror to see the upper half of your face was fully covered up to your hairline, the only thing you could see were your eyes peeking out from behind it. Happy with the results, you giddily moved out of your room to go show everyone how cool your mask was.

 As you continued your journey through high school, you didn’t meet your soulmate unfortunately. Some of your friends did, both in and out of school, but they were the minority. It was after all, very unlikely to meet your soulmate before the age of 24. You were happy for them, but at the same time, couldn’t wait to find your partner. You were reminded again that not every one was destined to be lovers though, unfortunately one of your best friends had met their soulmate and he wasn’t romantically interested in him.

You remember consoling her, distraught as she was, and reminding yourself that this was why you tried to keep your hopes low, you don’t know what role your soulmate is going to take in your life. You were there by her side though, and as she worked through her own dashed hopes and feelings, the two of them had one of the strongest friendships you’d ever seen in your life. It was beautiful, and honestly made you a bit jealous. You were impatient, you wanted to have your soulmate in your life now, even though you knew deep down that they’d be worth waiting for.

Something that you’d be able to partake in when you turned 18, because you hadn’t yet found your soulmate, were the extravagant galas. They were held both publicly and privately by benefactors for people who hadn’t yet met their soulmates. They were always wild times, held in busy city halls, or in fields with beautiful sunsets. Each of them was full with magic and everything slightly distorted by the number of soulmates meeting up and finally getting to share their lives together. They were also full of practiced wizards creating entertainment of both amusing and wacky feats, which made the parties highly attended no matter the age or personal status.

There were only a few rules of the parties; that you always had to be dressed in masquerade attire that matched with your mask, and even if you found your soulmate at the parties, you couldn’t remove your masks until after the party was done.

These parties were often held a few times a month, so that those with busy schedules could still get the chance to go out and try to meet their soulmates. Although part of you wanted to go to one of these galas the moment you turned 18, you didn’t really get the chance until a few months after your birthday.

You remember vividly from that night many things, the wizard in the lovely velvet top hat who was creating life sized characters out of smoke to do battle with one another, the giant ice sculptures that seemed to change shape every time you looked away, the creatures that normally avoided humans coming to watch, seeing what was happening and making deals with the foolish ones. You felt the entire night as if you were in a daze, and you probably were with the fumes from many different things clouding up your mind just slightly so that the entire night was just slightly hazy and tinged with a surreal quality. Were you really sure that you’d seen those flash of fangs from the tall dark man with the dreadlocks? You couldn’t be sure.

All in all, you’d enjoyed your night plenty, met some great people and seen interesting things. Alas, you were no closer to finding your soulmate than before. You decided that you’d go to one of these galas every month or two, just to see if by chance, you’d happen upon them one time. For a few months during the summer, you’d had no such luck, going and enjoying yourself with only a few new friends to show for it and a much greater understanding of magic and its limits. You’d decided as you went into university to pursue some discipline that would allow you to combine your other interests with your newfound interest in magic.

Life continued that way for a couple years, school, a part time job, friends, galas, and visiting new places when you could to see if maybe in one of those random places, you’d finally happen upon one of them. First year had kicked your ass, but you’d gotten through it with some help from your friends, and even though second year had been tough as well, you’d gotten the hang of it quite well. Something that made you feel marginally better about your lack of success, was that you weren’t the only one who was still stuck with their mask attached to their face. It was actually pretty even set still, the people with masks and without, despite everyone around you being an older age than you were when you first got your mask.

Every once and a while though, you’d dream of the gorgeous swan again, although the dream was never the same as any of the ones that would happen before. Sometimes you were chasing it through the outdoors, whether that be through a forest, a cave or a city, or if you were following it through places you knew like the back of your hand. Every time you’d have one of these dreams, you’d feel melancholy for a few days afterwards, your mind always feeling foggy and unbalanced.

Since it had been a longstanding occurrence, after consulting some friends, you decided to visit a woman in your university that specialized in dream studies and soul connections. Their office hours were online and they actually encouraged people with reoccurring dreams and those with what people thought were atypical soul connections. You were excited and ready to see if you could learn something to help you find your soulmate with their help.

So, the next day you had class, you went ahead of your schedule by an hour to the campus, wanting to drop in to their office as soon as you could. It was in a secluded area of the university, quiet and peaceful, you felt yourself grow more relaxed as you entered the hallway where their office was. Your breath was slightly taken away as you realized it was located on the inside of the greenhouse. There were gorgeous flowers and ivy growing up the walls of the greenhouse and flowers of all colours covering most of the available garden space. There was a flowing artificial river, which beside them were benches and small tables for games. Around the entire room where floating orbs of colour lighting up the garden many shades from different locations. There were also bird feeders and other decorations floating merrily in places.

You approached the door that was between the two trees, looking at the nameplate to read Professor Nirone, the person who you looked up on the weekend. Hyping yourself up a little bit, you steadied your nerves and gave three sharp knocks on the door and stepped back

“Come in!” came a reedy voice from inside, mid-toned and rather sleepy.

You turn the knob and open the door which creaks a little. Inside is a rather homey looking office, one that is well lit with natural light, and has a few chairs by a crackling fireplace. The rugs were worn with intricate designs, and the Professor behind the desk was a cheery person, slender and wearing spectacles.

“Hello Professor Nirone? I’m Y/N, I saw that you had open hours for people who had questions about dreams and strange soul connections?”

“Yes, yes of course!” they say excitedly, standing up from behind the desk to go and shake your hand. “My office is always open to students and faculty!” They have a firm handshake and they guide you to sit down with them at the fireplace. “Would you like some tea? I have a pot of earl grey on right now.”

“Yes please!” and they grab it for the two of you, pouring out two cups. One of them was a bright blue and the other was an orange. They hand you the orange cup.

“How can I help you then?” they ask once you’ve both settled down.

“Well, Professor, I came to you because I was curious about some dreams that I think are connected to my soulmate. I’m really unsure of what they mean though, and I could use some guidance on understanding them.”

“Then you came to the right place! Please, when did they start and what were they about that you believe mean they’re connected to your soulmate.”

“Ah, it started the night before I received my mask on my sixteenth birthday, and they weren’t reoccurring dreams per say, more that they had similar elements and feelings attached with them.” You begin. “I’ve had them every few months or so since then.”

They nod. “That’s a common occurrence within soulmates, often times they will get dreams about something that really shows the essence of their partner. Although usually they change a bit over the years depending on your partner’s life journey.”

“Yes, well the reason I’m confused is because the object of the dream is always the same no matter the setting. Sometimes I know the setting, sometimes I don’t, but I’m always following this swan no matter what. I get this sense of familiarity and happiness, but I never catch up to it no matter what.”

“You have an interesting story, my dear. Let me ask you, what is the swan doing while you’re following after it? If it does, does it depend on the setting or is it always repeating actions?”

“Well, I guess the swan kind of does a pattern of things, it looks around, observes things for a time until it gets distracted and moves to look at that new thing or event. It kind of spends as much time as it wants observing something? But the swan is always out of my reach. So is there anything you could tell me about that?”

“Well, let me get some materials out and show you a few things. There might be some answers that we can see fitting for you.” They go back over to their desk, looking through some file folders and grabbing a few sheets. Leafing through, they start speaking again, and you listen up.

“When there’s a reoccurring pattern within a soulmate dream there are a few ways to interpret that. One, that something in the dream is talking about how to find one another and giving insight into the fated meeting, or two, that the dream is giving you insight about the nature of your partner.”

“So, I might not even get to meet them? There are no repeated meeting spots or anything, which means its all about their nature…”

“Maybe, however I like to think that there’s a good chance for meeting your soulmate when you have this many soul dreams so close together. Don’t give up faith so quickly.”

“I’ll try my best, thank you for the help Professor.” You continue to chat with them for a little while, finishing your tea and feeling much better about your current situation. The whole meeting had gone better than you had hoped it would.

 The next gala was two nights away from today, and you were excited, because for some reason, you had a good feeling about this one. You felt emboldened by the words of the Professor, and kept faith that you’d get to meet this soulmate that seemed to have an endless sense of curiosity and wonder with the world around them. You feel like they’d definitely attend the soulmate galas, there was always so many interesting things taking place in and around them. Especially in the warmer months when the parties would seep outside, and they would become an entire community event.

You tried to get through the next few days as quickly as you possibly could, breezing through your lessons, homework and job as you looked forwards in excitement. Finally, the day arrived. This gala would be held by the community center in your city, and you were hoping to see which magicians would be there this year.

You dressed in your formal attire, taking care to make sure that your mask was clean and gleaming, and making sure your hair is all in place. You want to make a good impression if you meet them today after all. Grabbing your phone, you head down to the subway station near your house to get to the gala. The station was busy, as expected, and you got jostled around a fair bit. The closer you got to the community center however, the more outlandish the people and decorations became.

This was your favourite part, seeing everything morph from normal to fantastical, colours streaming everywhere, smoke creating shapes as people try and awe one another with their skills. You swear you see a couple of centaurs running through the crowd, causing chaos and laughing boisterously. The subway has to stop a few stops early due to the congestion of the inner core of the party. You don’t mind the walk, because you get to pass by little vendors who’ve set up shop, selling pretty wares and drinks and food.

You stop at a little man’s shop a few buildings down from the community center, purchasing a small drink to help you relax. It’s a potion with a light sedative meant for calming the mind and enjoying the party.

You sipped it as you finally reached the steps, there were people of all types, some with masks, some without, all decorating the surrounding area. You could hear music streaming from the inside as people and lights and colours streamed in and out without any discernable pattern. You let the sensations wash over you, feeling yourself relax despite the amount of people and excitement around you.

You wander in, eyes greedily taking sight of anything and everything you can. No matter how many times you go to these events, you’ll never get enough of the sights, you’re pretty sure that you’re going to attend many a gala after you find your soulmate.

You glide up the staircase, watching a couple blow bubbles into balloon animals to entertain a small group of younger high school students, this is likely their first event. You recognize the wonder in their eyes.

Inside the community center is a hall, within it, both couples and newly met soulmates dance a sweet waltz, the mayor seated above them on a balcony on a grandiose chair watching down on them happily. His soulmate sits beside them and they both have donned their masks for the special occasion.

You get swept up between the dancers, overwhelmed in a good way as you giggle and move along with the flow, putting your arms up and doing half the steps on your own. You twirl around, feeling your clothes swish around you, as colours spin around the room in a dizzying array of beauty.

Getting lost like this is your favourite.

But there was something different this time, there! Out of the corner of your eye! You caught a dress the colour of your mask, but they were running after something the other way. You immediately drop your arms, the dance forgotten as you dodge and weave between the people. You’ve seen the colour of your mask every time that you’ve looked in the mirror, and haven’t seen it on anyone else’s clothes. But that woman’s dress, it matched, you knew it did.

So, you followed, as quickly as you could in your stuffy fancy clothes and shoes. From what you could see, she had long light blue hair, which looked sleek in the candle lighting. She was moving quickly, faster than anyone you’d seen in heels, as she seemed to take in everything around her.

Suddenly, you lose sight of her as she stops and stares at something then dashes off. You get to where you last saw her, and looked around carefully, trying to get any hint of which way she might’ve gone.

You see nothing. You’ve completely lost her.

You tried to fight down the disappointment that was threatening to overcome you. So close, but you didn’t even get to reach her, you couldn’t speak with her at all! It felt like the universe was keeping them away from you on purpose or something. It made you feel bitter and upset, but if you saw her here, you figured she must be around in the area. It would be tough, but you knew you had to try and hold out hope that you’d find her once again. Maybe she’d even be around for the next local gala, and you could perhaps find her there?

The next few days were difficult for you, but you tried to keep your mindset as positive as you could, despite the massive amounts of disappointment you felt from the party. Nothing else happened that night, even though you kept your eye out for her in case she was still wandering around. For the first time, you left a gala with a disheartened feeling completely choking your chest, tears leaking from your eyes. You’d been so close.

The greenhouse you had found looking for Professor Nerone became a bit of a salvation for you, it was far out of the way, so you didn’t have to see a bunch of people happy with their soulmates, but also was a calming place with a beautiful scenery. Plus, with the tables and benches, you could catch up on work in comfort and solitude.

This carried on for about a week, you felt depressed no matter how many times you told yourself that you’d lasted this long without your soulmate, so you were being a bit ridiculous.

It’s just that before then, you hadn’t seen her.

“Hey, hey, don’t you know? This place is really far from all of the main classes. What are you doing here, if I could bother you a little bit?” A voice interrupted your wallowing. Her voice was cheery and wistful, with a curious lilt to it. You’d never heard such a sweet voice before in all honesty.

“Oh, I’m just here doing some work-“ You brought your eyes up to meet hers, and you gasped in shock as your eyes met hers. “It’s you!”

“Oh my, well isn’t this a surprise!” she smiles. You feel the mask that had been moulded to your face for the past six years just let go and drop into your lap. Hers falls off as well and she catches it, eyes crinkled at the corners from how wide she’s smiling. “I’m Hado Nejire! It’s nice to meet you soulmate.” She gives you a cheeky wink.

The few weeks of getting to know Hado were something interesting to say the least, she was by far one of the most inquisitive and entertaining people you’ve met. Often times asking people questions that had your mouth gaping in shock, because that’s not the societal norm to do that. You could tell she never meant any harm though; she just had an insatiable appetite for knowledge and understanding.

She was also open with her affections with you, after getting signs that you were alright with her touching you, she’d often hold your hand when you walked places, swinging it around as she told you about all the cool things she’d seen the other day. She also gave some of the best hugs, and was probably the coolest person you’d ever met.

You’d also learned that people didn’t exaggerate the soulmate bond. Never before had you clicked with someone so easily, and you didn’t ever really feel uncomfortable around her. She made you feel more confident and opened your mind up with all of her interesting discoveries and off topic information.

“Hey, hey, Y/N? Can I ask you a question?” she asks as you’re both hanging out, doing your different sets of homework in her apartment she shared with two friends; Mirio and Tamaki.

“Of course,” you responded, a little amused at her need to always ask in that little way she had. It was endearing to you.

“What did you hope for me to be?”

“What do you mean?”

“I was curious as to what you wanted from your soulmate before you knew who I was.”

“Hado, why is that important? I have you and that’s what matters.”

“Hmm… I suppose so. It’s just I wanted to know if we were in a similar boat, so to speak.” She taps her chin her eyes focused on something you couldn’t quite see. In the few weeks you’d known her, you noticed that this was a frequent occurrence, she seemed to be in another world sometimes, connecting things all around her.

You loved it, you felt like you loved her. But you didn’t know if she felt the same, and you think it would break you if she didn’t feel the same way.

You felt more sympathy for your old friend then you ever had in your life. Losing something once it was presented in front of you was so much more difficult than you’d thought in the moment. You knew you wouldn’t lose Hado, she wasn’t as shallow as to cut you out of her life for liking her in a different way she did. It was more the fact that you know you would likely lose the possibility of finding a deep soul connection with a romantic partner. It wasn’t unheard of, but very rare, for anyone to establish a bond as deep as the ones with their soulmates.

You wanted to be with Hado in every sense of the word, she made you better, and you like to think that you made her better too. The world seemed a bit more mystical with her in your life, and you wanted to have that in all aspects of your life. You knew it was a bit selfish, but you would back off completely if that’s not what she wanted from you.

Hado shakes you out of your thoughts, “I suppose I should tell you, because I do trust you, Y/N, I really do. I just don’t want you to look at me differently, you know?”

You put your hand on hers, your heartbeat elevated as you look into her eyes. What did she mean? All you could do was tell her the truth.

“Hado, I would never look at you different because of what you hoped that I could be for you. All I hope is that I’m enough for you.”

She grasps you in a hug after that. “Of course you’re enough for me Y/N! You’ve made my life better! It’s just, you know how much I seem to get lost in another world, when I was a kid I used to imagine being with my soulmate.”

“I did too,” you admit, shyly locking eyes. “I imagined meeting them and falling in love, going out on dates, marrying them.” Her eyes were sparkling as you spoke, listening raptly to you.

“I did the same!” you felt immensely relieved at hearing that.

“Well, Hado, I think part of that’s already happened with you if I’m being honest with myself.”

“Y/N, it’s alright, I’m falling for you too!” your mouth falls open in shock and she laughs at the face you’re making.

“Hey, hey Y/N? Can I kiss you?”

“Please.” You respond and she leans in and presses her lips to yours sweetly.

You really were lucky to have a soulmate as good as Hado Nejire.

[naruhearts]

OKAY SO I've just spent the best part of an hour scrolling through your blog and reading a bunch of your destiel meta and I HAD to message you... I was one of the many people who STRONGLY believed destiel had a chance of being canon after season 8 (more like season gr8 am i right), but throughout the years I slowly lost all hope. However, S14 has made me 110% invested in the show again and YOUR META IS GIVING ME HOPE FOR DESTIEL, which is TERRIFYING. Your writing is wonderful and I'm STRESSED.

Got back from Washington late last night!

Oh my gosh @alovelikecas, your message really made my day and I’m SO glad you enjoy my meta xox (even when most of my meta looks like, to me, sloppy-ass writing, haha! I’ll probably make an end-season meta post after 14x20 — if I have the time — that touches upon SPN’s current and repeating themes since Season New Beginnings S12/Dabb Era, not to mention I have, like, some more unfinished meta in my drafts >.>)

Yeah I mean, I didn’t join Destiel land until Summer 2016, and before that, I was late to the Season 11 party, so I basically had no narrative context for anything, and I’ll copy-paste what I said here: 

Looking back, one significant thing I recall? S11 gave me a sense of Destiel’s true narrative validity (as not a ‘fanon’ ship but organically developed in the canon) when I perceived it as a season that was ‘missing something’. Keep in mind I had no idea about Destiel yet while watching S11 at the time.

I was literally asking myself — repeatedly — why Dean/Amara seemed to contain odd narrative holes, considering A. Dean explicitly said that the non-consensual attraction he felt for Amara was NOT love and “it scares him”, B. Amara told Dean that ‘something stops you - keeps you from having it all’, C. Djinn!Amara stated that she can: ‘feel the love [Dean] feels, except it’s cloaked in shame,’ and D. Mildred’s iconic ‘You’re pining for someone’ —> which did not logically correlate with A and C, meaning: since Dean doesn’t freely love Amara and thus isn’t possibly pining for her — with female love interests as currently non-existent (I remember crossing off the dead/gone girls on a piece of paper lol) — who the hell was he pining for, then?

Originally posted by elizabethrobertajones

Obviously, without writing long-ass paragraphs of meta about it again in this post, S11 made sense as soon as I watched it within the Destiel context (especially after I read up on some grandiose pieces of Destiel meta (@charlie-minion was the very first person who inspired me to write meta; I followed her once I joined the fandom Oh my god, here we go, holy crap this subtext – I’m invested in this godforsaken ship because they’re in love with each other and I’m not getting off any time soon. The rest is history.

I’m aware that I do come off as positive (and I’m still Destiel-positive; whatever happens in 14x20 this week may or may not change that), but I hope you don’t mind if I use your lovely ask as an additional opportunity to clarify my meta standpoint: no one’s saying Destiel WILL become text. 

The general Destiel meta community (all subfactions: Destiel-positive, -negative, -neutral, and in-between) is not the Most Holy Canon Word, and we aren’t SPN writers, and again, we can’t actually speak to the veracity of Destiel as guaranteed-gonna-go-textual, but we — a diverse pool of critical thinkers from all walks of life: particularly those who have some degree of experience in literary academia/English literature studies (fun fact: I was actually pursuing a Minor’s in English until I changed my mind - my first love’s Health Science/Biology, which I stuck with, but here I am doing lit-crit analysis on the side *wink*) — can speak to the veracity of Destiel as a real, palpable, and ever-substantial long-running romance narrative aka the love story between Dean and Cas IS THERE. I see it. We all see it. We didn’t pluck it out of the random ether one day. It naturally evolved across the show’s overarching narrative like some vast spiderweb, linked together by numerous character arc amalgamations of Dean Winchester and Castiel as separate individuals who were then brought together — who brought themselves together, by the sheer force of free will and choice — and are now inherent parts of the other’s story (and respective character progression).

I say this too many times to count: the entire point of writing meta? Personally, it enables me to appreciate the literary gorgeousness of Dean and Cas’ relationship as, first and foremost, a tentative alliance offset by the very moment Cas raised Dean from perdition (it’s a poetic beginning). Their alliance then inevitably proliferated into a rocky — at times, necessarily turbulent — friendship, then a deep profound bond…one that crossed platonic boundaries since S7/8 and is, ultimately, indelibly rooted in romance. Together, Dean and Cas build up each other’s strengths, complement each other’s flaws, and narratively motivate the other to self-introspect — to become the best version of themselves that they were always meant to be: self-actualized entities who let go of their painful, horrifying, psychologically/emotionally destitute pasts.

These above reasons and more are why I think Destiel belongs right up there on the shelf of Ye Olde Classics, similar to epics by John Milton, Shakespearian tragic dramas, Homeric characteristic cruxes, and the great Odyssey journey: a legendary journey, fraught with circumstance, that finally ended with Odysseus (now an enlightened man) returning to Penelope, the love of his life.

Channeling the scope of Homer’s Odyssey, Destiel is an incredible storytelling feat of obstacles, both internal and external, romance tropes, mirroring, foreshadowing, and visual cadence/emotion, enhancing SPN’s already character-driven main plot in that Dean and Cas try to make it back to one another; like Penelope, their love holds true despite everything. If Destiel were an M/F couple, we all know their love story would be absolutely undeniable to the GA.

I do understand the bitterness S14’s fostered in some viewers, though. I do understand that Dean and Cas seem distant (and yeah, it’s a noticeable difference compared to S12/S13), but I believe the Destiel subtext is still heavy and holds steady.

Right now, at this point, there remains multiple personal issues for the characters to solve, you know? Dean and Cas aren’t talking properly; their love languages stay mistranslated, although we’re persistently shown that they still understand each other on a certain level that no one else can, and the visual narrative keeps framing them as on-the-nose solid counterparts: a domestic-spousal romantic unit independent of Sam.

Originally posted by incatastrophicmind

They want to be there for the other. They need to quash the final remnants of their respective internal loathing (Dean’s self-worthiness, Cas’ self-expendability) before they’re able to give the other 100% of their time, efforts, attention, and love (as flawed and complicated but compellingly beautiful as it can possibly be). During the times Dean and Cas do try to talk shit out, extraneous issues continue to get between them.

As other friends/meta pals discussed with me, S14 is like S10 in that it’s confusing the cast/audiences. And exactly: S8, besides S11/S12/early S13, also belongs in the close-to-canon serious Destiel narrative transition! I can discuss the showrunning/writer problem of SBL (Singer + Bucklemming; @occamshipper hits the nail on the head) that tugs subtext – especially subtext linked to Destiel – back and forth, sometimes in the weirdest nonsensical ways, but I won’t go too far into it here. I agree, however, with the recent idea that Jensen does seem a bit confused as to where he should bring Dean emotionally this season (don’t get me wrong, I do NOT believe Dean is OOC; OOC is a completely different concept vs expected character behaviour). And if Dean’s consistently romance-coded past interactions with Cas are any indication, Jensen would also — in the same vein as all of us — want Dean and Cas to start getting their shit together. Long-running fictional characters like Dean and Cas, conceived over 10 years, are so well-written to the point where you, the author, can predict what they’ll do even if you just plop both of them inside a room and give them no direction, and I personally feel that nowadays Jensen is prevented from achieving Dean’s further internal growth/unsure how to act in the moment because of some dumb SBL scripts saying one thing while his character’s heart says another. Wank aside—

Season 15 should hopefully convey a much more logical subtextual perspective e.g. unbelievably amazingly cohesive Season Destiel 11 that aired after choppy S10. Not all hope is lost!! I also want to clarify that I personally LOVED Season 14 in general. It’s been mostly Emotion-centric constant, with Yockey, Berens, Perez, and Dabb usually making my top-rank SPN writer list.

Currently the narrative’s still allowing pretty significant (imho) wiggle room for the lovers to fracture apart and get back together, where their miscommunication comes to a dramatic head. We just saw Dean and Cas argue over Jack’s well-being in 14x18 and 19. Dean — besides putting Cas at the top of his You’re-Dead-to-Me-Because-You-Lied-but-I-Still-Love-You-Goddammit hitlist (for clear spousal-coded reasons) and taking Cas’ actions to heart (he’s the person he trusted the most who lied to him) — no doubt blamed himself for what happened, and Sam was, like I said, the mouthpiece of truth. TFW were all culpable. They all failed Jack in some way, shape, or form.

I’m not expecting anything for 14x20, but I’m nervous either way! Thanks for sticking with my long answer

[overlordofthelollipopguild]

Life Just Got Complicated - Chapter 3

Another in honor of Jen’s birthday post!

In this next chapter of my modern AU/roommates to lovers fic, Emma is still avoiding Killian and Ruby and Belle suspect that something is going on.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14260986/chapters/32988810

Fanfiction.net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12482512/3/Life-Just-Got-Complicated

Chapter 3: Avoiding the Issue

Killian wasn’t sure if Emma was a morning person or not, so he made the morning coffee and breakfast as quietly as possible, which for Killian wasn’t much of a feat. Liam and David used to joke that he could be a ninja, sneaking up on people like he did, purposefully or not. It seemed that his particular skill was handy now. It kept him from disturbing Emma and allowed him time to think.

It hurt that Emma seemed perfectly fine with not pursuing things between them. As they were strangers, he could give her that. A one night stand does not a relationship make. Still, he couldn’t help how he felt, no more than she could help how she felt. He had a gut feeling that she did feel something more, but the way she ran from him, the way she reacted to him last night, it wouldn’t do either of them any good to push the issue. He could live with that for now. What he didn’t want though was to share a living space, but avoid each other like the plague. Despite their odd situation, he did want to at least become friends or live with each other in a friendly and peaceable manner. Killian certainly didn’t want Emma feeling like she couldn’t live in her own home.

That was that then. He would shove down his feelings, and help make this living arrangement better for both of them.

He heard the creaking of a door, likely Emma’s bedroom, before feet padded across the hall. Another door opened and shut.

Killian sighed as he heard the shower turn on. That kind of avoidance was exactly what they needed to stop before it even started. He plated eggs and bacon for her and placed it in the microwave so that she could heat it whenever she was ready. Placing his own plate and mug on the bar, he moved to the stool, opening his phone to check his emails while he ate.

He had a few assignments due by the end of the week, but nothing new was coming in. He needed to make a few calls and send off some emails then. Freelance writing had its perks, but always looking for new jobs was one of the bigger cons. Belle kept pestering him to publish more of his fiction though. He had a few short stories and poems out there, but nothing that made much money. She thought he ought to write a novel. What the bloody hell could he write about?

A pretty, prickly blonde perhaps?

Killian shook his head, a scoff escaping him.

The shower shut off, but he tried to ignore it, tried to push away the images of Emma wet and naked, which wasn’t hard to imagine considering that he knew exactly what she looked like naked. Killian quickly polished off his breakfast, silently berating himself for thinking along those lines. Washing the dishes wasn’t much of a distraction either as he could hear every move she made. Apparently the walls in this apartment were paper thin.

He needed a better distraction. Work would do it. He always became absorbed in his assignments.

Before he could leave the kitchenette though, Emma cautiously peered over the bar. Her eyes widened a bit, startled at seeing him there.

“I made breakfast.” Killian said gently. “Your plate is in the microwave.”

“I’m not really a breakfast person.” Emma said. “Just coffee.” She gave him a wide berth when she passed him to get to the coffee machine. Quite a feat considering how small the kitchenette was and he was standing in the middle of it.

Killian wasn’t sure what to say. There was an air of awkwardness around them again. He needed to figure out how to break through it. “Look, Emma...”

Emma sighed, turning around to face him. “You want to talk about us, right? Let me make it easy, I don’t do relationships. One night stands are as far as I go. Wooing me with breakfast food isn’t going to change my mind.”

“Actually that’s not what I wanted to say.” Killian said, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned against the counter. “The breakfast food was habit. Belle and I used to trade off cooking duties.”

“Oh.” Emma flushed a little with embarrassment.

Killian continued. “I wanted to say that with us being roommates, we can’t avoid each other forever. Last night we said we were going to start over and we can’t do that if we’re still acting like we have a history. I’d like to try to be friends.”

Emma considered his words as she turned back around to make her coffee.

As he watched Emma, Killian nervously awaited her answer. He hoped that she was receptive to him.

Once her coffee was done, Emma faced him. “How about we start with roommates and go from there?”

Killian smiled. “That works for me.”

Emma didn’t return the smile.

To avoid the awkward silence, Killian went out into the living room and powered on his laptop.

Emma watched him curiously as she looked out over the bar area. “Shouldn’t you go to work?”

“I’m a freelance writer.” Killian told her. “I mostly work from home. What about you?”

Emma walked into the living room, sitting a safe distance away from Killian on her couch.

Killian occupied his armchair that Ruby had assured him could move in and that Emma wouldn’t mind it.

“I work at a bailbonds agency.” Emma said. “Fox Bailbonds.”

He tilted his head with a curious look. “You seem more bounty hunter type than bail bonds.”

“I’m surprised you know there’s a difference.” Emma said.

“I’ve had run ins.” Killian shrugged.

Emma arched a brow. “You’re a criminal?”

There wasn’t any judgement in her tone.

“Just a minor offense.” Killian gave her a small, reassuring smile. “I was going through some shit, just moved to New York, didn’t have anyone, so I did something stupid.”

Emma appreciated his honesty. “I was a petty criminal. Three years ago, Cleo, my boss tracked me down and managed to give me a second chance.”

“That’s wonderful, Swan.” Killian smiled gently.

Emma ignored the way her heart skipped a beat. She didn’t ignore the panic that set in when she realized that they were bonding, unintentionally of course, but that wouldn’t do. It took her months to even get to this point with Ruby, and even though she agreed to be civil with Killian, she wasn’t ready for a new friend. “I should go get ready for work.” She excused herself.

Killian watched her go with a sigh. His new roommate was a skittish one. If she balked this quickly into civil conversation, then it would take time to ease her into friendship. It was a good thing that Killian was a patient man.

Emma knew that calling Ruby would result in her calls being ignored, which was why Emma was waiting outside of the magazine that Ruby worked for. She’d ambush her friend when she came out for her lunch break. The perks of being roommates and friends meant that Emma knew Ruby’s routine and at noon on Thursday Ruby liked to go out to eat at a trendy little cafe.  

Emma laid in wait, watching for her prey. Prey that had no idea just how much trouble she was in with her blonde friend. How could Ruby just bail? Was she that desperate to set Emma and Killian up? Admittedly, had she and Killian not had a one night stand under her belt, and had he not been her roommate, Emma would’ve hooked up with him, but nothing more.

Ruby knew that Emma didn’t do relationships, but insisted upon girls night out to scope for guys, or telling Emma about the new cute guy at work, or the cute barista at the Starbucks a few blocks over, etc. etc.

Killian had been the top contender. Emma lost count of the times Ruby, or even Belle, would bring him up in a conversation that would inevitably lead to trying to set them up.

Well, that definitely wouldn’t happen now.

Emma watched the door of the building.

It was almost time for Ruby to come out. Sure enough, the brunette graphic designer walked out, catching eyes in her expensive suit and neck breaking red heels.

Emma pounced, coming up from behind Ruby. “I can’t believe you bailed.”

Ruby’s green eyes widened. “Jeez, you scared the crap out of me.” She whacked Emma on the arm. “Don’t do that.”

“You deserved it.” Emma growled, walking at Ruby’s side as Ruby headed off. “You can’t deny that.”

“Belle and I wanted some alone time.” Ruby lied.

They were almost to the cafe, and Emma really wasn’t in the mood for lunch.

Emma rolled her eyes. “You two live together, you have nothing but alone time. You were setting us up.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Ruby denied, though there was amusement in her eyes.

“I know you, Ruby.” Emma said. “Look, I’m just going to tell you that Killian and I met now and we’re just going to be roommates, got it? No more set ups.”

Ruby sighed, disappointed. “But you two are perfect for each other.”

“There’s no such thing as perfect.” Emma told her. Even as she said it, Emma couldn’t help but think about her and Killian’s night together, and how perfectly they fit together, and how they connected. She shook her head, trying to shake away the memories. “Killian and I are just roommates, got it?”

Ruby stopped and narrowed her eyes. “Why do you sound like you’re trying to convince yourself of that?”

“I…I’m not.” Emma sputtered.

“You have something to tell me?” Ruby asked. Her eyes flitted all over Emma’s face before meeting Emma’s eyes. “You think he’s hot, don’t you?”

Dammit. Emma cursed.

Ruby had her.

“Objectively, yes.” Emma admitted with a growl. “Subjectively, it isn’t happening.”

Ruby wasn’t convinced. “I think that’s just fine. You two are just roommates.” There was a teasing underlining in her tone.

“I’m serious, Ruby.” Emma hissed.

“Okay, okay.” Finally Ruby was being serious. “I will cease and desist on Operation Emma’s Love Life. Belle and I won’t leave you and Killian hanging anymore.”

Emma sighed, relieved. “Thank you.”

“So, how is Killian working out as a roommate?” Ruby asked.

Emma gave her a sour look.

“Just as a roommate.” Ruby corrected.

“He’s…okay.” Emma shrugged. Really, so far he was great. He was quiet, kept to himself (though the awkward one night stand thing probably kept him away), he could cook, and from what Emma could tell of his room when she peeked in (the door was open) he was neat. So far, he certainly exceeded her expectations. Though she would hold back any higher opinions that she had of him for now. For all she knew, he could be acting like this to woo her. Okay, so she really didn’t think that he was doing this all for her, he probably, more than likely, was just like that, but Emma Swan liked her excuses.

“Just okay?” Ruby asked.

“Well, we’ve been roommates for one night.” Emma said. “It’ll take a while to get used to him.”

Ruby scoffed. “All right, whatever you say.”

They reached the cafe.

“Come on, I’ll buy you lunch.” Ruby said.

Emma shook her head. She really wasn’t hungry. “I got to get back before Cleo kills me.”

“Please, Cleo adores you.” Ruby scoffed.

“I’ll see you later, Rubes.” Emma said. She headed back up the way they came from to get to her car. As she walked, she thought about Killian, to her annoyance. He seemed to invade her mind every moment. She wished that they hadn’t met and slept together; not that she regretted it, it was a special night, but that was only going to make living with him all that much more harder. It was just too tempting to give into the attraction, but she wouldn’t. Emma refused to have another relationship. She wasn’t going to risk her heart again.

Killian was just her roommate and would only ever be her roommate.

At least that’s what she firmly told herself as she made her way back to her bug.

Belle looked up when lunch was deposited at her table.

Killian sat down with a sigh.

Belle eyed him as she pulled the to-go box over to her, using her other hand to push her books and papers aside. She never asked how Killian always managed to sneak food into places where outside food wasn’t welcome. Namely the libraries that Belle haunted.

She was grateful for the Rueben and curly fries though. It was past lunchtime and she had only had a meager breakfast. Caught up in her graduate work, she hadn’t caught the time, and it was a testament to how well Killian knew her that he knew where she was and that she’d skipped lunch again. “How was last night?” She asked fishing in the bag for ketchup.

Killian grumbled, stealing one of her fries. “It went okay.” He sighed and corrected himself. “It was awkward.”

“I expect so.” Belle said. “So, what happened?”

I learned my roommate was the best sex I ever had. Killian shook his head. “It was awkward.”

Belle grinned cheekily. “You said that already.”

Killian stole another fry. “She was…” Beautiful, breathtaking, hated to see me again, prickly. “Prickly.” It was the best word for now.

“That’s Emma.” Belle agreed. “She’ll warm up to you eventually.”

Or never. Killian sighed. He stole another fry.

Belle narrowed her eyes. “Okay, that’s the third fry you’ve stolen in less than five minutes. You never steal that much that quickly.”

“So?” Killian swallowed nervously.

“So, you’re stress eating.” Belle said. “You only do that when you’re wound up over something.”

“I’m not wound up.” Killian huffed. His hand automatically reached for another fry, but he stopped himself.

Belle looked triumphant. Belle placed her chin on her hands as she looked at him. “Come on now. You can tell me the truth. We are best friends after all.”

“Don’t play the best friend card.” Killian grumbled.

“Don’t make me annoy you into telling me.” Belle said.

“You truly are the little sister I never wanted.” Killian huffed.

Belle stuck her tongue out at him before returning her attention to her sandwich. “I will make you talk eventually, Jones.”

Killian knew that she was right, but if he were to have any kind of civil relationship with Emma, he needed to feed Belle false information. Or at least a half-truth, but he couldn’t say anything just yet. He needed to think. “What are you working on?”

“Changing the subject isn’t the smoothest move.” Belle arched a brow.

She indulged him anyway and showed him her edits in her graduate thesis as she usually did whenever she made edits on it.

As Killian read in silence, Belle ate her lunch and studied him. He was definitely not being totally honest about his and Emma’s meeting last night, but why wouldn’t he be? Had Emma been more than prickly? Had Killian stuck his foot in his mouth? Belle had to know. Unlike her girlfriend though, Belle had patience. She’d let it go for now, and then lie in wait and ambush Killian when the time was right.

Like she said, she’d make him talk eventually.

With all of his things officially unpacked, Killian surveyed his new room. All of the empty boxes were stacked neatly by the door to be taken to recycle later.

His furniture was immaculate, his bed made neatly, and all of his clothes properly folded or hung up and put away. With nothing more to do, he went into the living room to work on his assignments.

He brewed some more coffee and settled in his armchair. Flexing his fingers, he set to work. It was a good distraction from the empty apartment and any lingering thoughts about Emma. He was so in the writing zone, that he didn't realize how late it had gotten. It was nearly dinnertime, so he got up and went in the kitchen to start dinner. He hadn’t gone to the grocery store yet as Emma seemed to be low on foodstuff, but he was sure that he could scrounge up something.

He found sliced cheese and butter in the fridge, bread on the counter, and canned tomato soup in the cabinets. Easy enough to work with. Pouring the soup into a pot, Killian set it on medium heat and set out to work on the grilled cheese. He hoped she didn’t mind such a meal. Personally, he loved grilled cheese. When he and Liam were on their own after their father left, cheese and bread were cheap, so it was the first thing Liam taught him how to cook in case he ever needed to survive on his own.

Memories of watching Liam, who was barely a teenager himself, carefully instructing him at the stove assailed him.

Over the past five years, Killian’s self-imposed exile from Storybrooke had weighed heavily on him. His brother’s last words to him before he left town were especially cutting.

Maybe you just need to grow up and stop being so selfish. Liam had said harshly. When you do, then come and find me.

Killian had been so angry and hurt over their fight, that he had left Storybrooke that night and never looked back. Even more, he’d been so ashamed of himself that he cut off all ties to Liam and the rest of his friends. Reigniting his friendship with Ruby had been more due to Belle than anything else. For the past two years, Ruby had encouraged, but not pushed, him to return to Storybrooke, but he couldn’t face Liam. He was sure that his brother hated him now. And what of his friends? Would David be angry that Killian left? They had been as close as brothers and Killian had just stopped talking to him. Would he welcome Killian back? Would Liam?

He shook his head. He doubted they would. He was that coward that had screwed everything up, all because a pretty face turned his head and ripped out his heart.

Now Milah certainly wasn’t someone Killian thought about in a while, and he’d like to keep it that way. So instead of dwelling on the woman who turned him against his friends and family and then broke his heart, Killian focused back on the present. The grilled cheeses were done, and the soup hot enough.

Hopefully, Emma would be back soon. She never did say what her hours were, but he doubted in her line of work that there was standard set hours. He fixed her a bowl and plate anyway, covering them with foil to trap the heat. If it grew cold, she could warm them up later.

As he sat down at the bar, chewing his sandwich, he wondered about Emma. She was certainly someone who had been through a lot in her life. While he didn’t know anything about her past, it was clear to him that she had walls. Walls that she had let down for a moment when they made love that night before she ran. Now though, the walls were up and reinforced.

While there was a connection between them, Killian was content for now to be friends and just get to know her. The problem was that Emma didn’t seem to want that. He was certain that if her name wasn’t on the lease, she would’ve moved out as soon as she found out who he was. The thought alone made his stomach clench uncomfortably. He had thought about her every day since their one night together, and now that she was his roommate, he didn’t want to let her go again. He shouldn’t have let her go that night, but he hadn’t wanted to force her to stay. Not when she was that vulnerable.

He swallowed his sandwich down with effort as he thought about that night again, and how he only wanted to comfort her. Never in his life had he ever been so drawn to someone before. The moment he saw her alone at the bar, he could feel something there. It was as though there was a magnetic field around her, pulling him right in, helpless to stop himself.

She had felt it too, but it had scared her.

What had happened to her to make her walls so high?

When he finished dinner, he cleaned up and made a shopping list for tomorrow, writing down a note on the list to ask Emma what she needed. He returned to his work, and when he deemed himself finished for the night, it was nearing eleven and Emma still wasn’t home.

Worry began to collect in his gut, but he focused on his nightly routine instead. Once he was ready for bed, however, he decided that maybe he should try to wait up for her, just to ease his mind and also as a show of support. Perhaps if she knew he was here for her, then she might let him in, if only a tiny bit.

So he settled on the couch and flipped through the television station until he found a movie he could tolerate.

Hopefully, Emma would return soon.

It was cowardly to accept a stake out job when she and Killian agreed to not avoid each other, but Emma usually took one step forward then two steps back. 

Killian even told her that he just wanted to be friends, and Emma still wanted to run. There was something there between them. There had been something the moment she turned around and saw him at the bar. He pulled her right in and instead of running then, she took the plunge and went home with him with every intent on sex and no intention of staying after the act.

The fact that she had scared her more than anything. She had never met anyone like Killian before. No man ever turned her head and kept it turned; certainly no one had ever stayed with her like Killian. Well unless you counted that bastard who she really didn’t want to think about.

She didn’t want to think about Killian either, but it was hard not to. He was her roommate. How does anyone ever deal with their one night stand becoming their roommate? Then again, Emma doubted that this ever actually happened to people in real life. Maybe in fiction, but not in reality. It was just her luck that it happened to her.

Groaning, she leaned back in her car. How was she going to deal with this Killian issue? They were going to be living together for the foreseeable future. Killian wanted to be friends; Emma wasn’t sure how to be friends. Her track records for any type of long term platonic or romantic relationships was less than stellar. Only Ruby, and now Belle, being exceptions, but even then that was too much. Emma had felt deeply hurt when they wanted to move in together and take their relationship to the next level. While she had felt like a third wheel before, it had never been as prominent until Ruby broke the news to her. It was just another reminder of how alone she was.

You don’t have to be alone. A treacherous voice in her head spoke. There’s Killian.

Emma shook her head. No, that could never happen.

Why not? The voice persisted. He’s willing.

But Emma knew the answer. She was too broken to be loved; too broken to ever be mended again. Her jaw clenched as her eyes watered. Her whole life she was never enough, why would it be any different with a virtual stranger who happened to live with her?

She needed to focus on her job.

Sniffing and wiping her eyes, Emma steeled herself.

There would be time to deal with Killian later.

Belle groaned as Ruby turned the beside lamp back on.

“Don’t you think it’s weird?” Ruby asked.

Belle just wanted to sleep. Ever since she came home, Ruby had been on about her encounter with Emma today and how two things were clear: one, Emma did find Killian attractive and two, Emma was hiding something.

Then Belle had made the mistake of telling Ruby that Killian had stopped by the library today, which only launched her girlfriend into an interrogation. Belle had told her that Killian seemed weird like he was hiding something. That had only fueled Ruby’s conspiracy theory. Something had happened between Emma and Killian.

Belle wasn’t sure how much merit she could give said theory since Ruby had been trying to set Emma and Killian up forever. As it was, her girlfriend was obsessing. “Maybe Emma and Killian just seemed weird because we bailed on them and their first meeting was awkward.”

“You were the one who stared talking about christening our apartment.” Ruby pouted.

“Yeah, after we introduced Emma and Killian.” Belle corrected, glaring up at Ruby. “You were the one who tricked me into the moving van and drove off.”

Ruby smirked. “We had fun though , didn’t we?”

Belle blushed. “That’s not the point. Just leave them be, Ruby.” She turned around and snuggled into her pillow.

Ruby huffed, leaning back against the headboard. There was something else going on. She could feel it in her bones. Emma called it her “wolf sense” often comparing Ruby to a dog with a bone. And this bone was just too enticing to let go of. She knew the moment that she met Killian again when he moved here that something had changed in him from the sweet, naive guy she knew back in high school. Ever since then, that something about him had been telling Ruby that he and Emma would just fit together. If only they both stopped being so stubborn about it.

Belle might’ve been right that it was probably awkward for Emma and Killian to meet without buffers, but with how Emma was earlier, Ruby just knew that something else had happened. She was going to figure it out; she just had to be more subtle than she usually was.

But oh, eventually she was going to sniff out the truth.

“Go to sleep.” A tired Belle demanded.

Ruby turned off he lamp and curled around her girlfriend, her thoughts still whirling around her head as she drifted off to sleep.

It was way too late or too early. Emma wasn’t entirely sure. All she knew was that Cleo had given her tomorrow off to recover from the stakeout and her caffeine high was losing steam. She’d crash soon and she wanted to be in her bed when that happened.

When she reached her apartment door, she paused. She didn’t know why she was preparing herself to face Killian when surely he’d be asleep. But she would have to face him eventually. He was right; she couldn’t avoid him forever. Honestly, that wasn’t fair to either of them. Neither had known who the other was that night. That had been more her fault than his since she had insisted on no names. Taking a breath, Emma unlocked the door as quietly as possible. She didn’t know if he was a light sleeper or not, and she didn’t want to chance waking him up. When she entered the apartment and shut the door, she turned ready to go to bed when she spotted the television on, the light highlighting a form on the couch.

Immediately, she went on alert, getting ready for fight mode…until she stepped closer and got a better look.

Killian was sleeping on the couch in a very uncomfortable sitting position. His neck was certainly going to feel that when he woke up. Why was he even out here? He had a bed to sleep on. Not wanting to question it, figuring that he fell asleep with the television on, Emma went to the kitchen to grab a quick snack.

Inside the fridge, she found the grilled cheese and tomato soup. She look back at Killian’s form. He had made her dinner, and he waited up for her. That was why he was asleep on the couch. He was waiting for her to come home.

Not even Ruby had ever done that.

Something akin to affection unfurled in her heart no matter how hard she tried to squash it down. She set the food back in the fridge and walked over to the couch. Emma winced as she took him in; that position just didn’t look good with his head titled that far back. Emma hated to wake him, but she wanted to thank him before she chickened out.

Her hand went to his shoulder and gently, she shook him awake.

His eyes flew open instantly, startled by her presence. He blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting and he realized who she was.

Emma had to admit that he looked adorable when he first woke up, before quickly shoving that thought away.

Killian rubbed a hand over his face. “Emma?” He looked at her questioningly. “What time is it?”

“I don’t know.” She said softly. “You didn’t look comfortable sleeping here.”

He pushed himself up and winced. Emma was right. He was already feeling the aching muscles in his neck and back. “Thanks for waking me, Swan.” Killian gave her a small smile. “I guess we should both head to our beds then.”

“Wait.” Emma refused to back out this time. He needed to know what he had done was appreciated.

Killian looked at her curiously, waiting for her to continue.

Emma took a breath. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Killian was genuinely confused.

“For dinner.” Emma mumbled. “For making dinner, for waiting up for me. Also for being okay with the whole starting over thing.” She was sure her cheeks were a little red from embarrassment.

Killian gave her a winning smile. “You don’t have to thank me for that, Swan. That’s just what friends do.”

Despite her adamancy at being nothing more than roommates this morning, she felt warmth from Killian referring to her as his friend. “Still, thank you.”

Killian ducked his head. “It’s no problem.” He checked the time on his cell phone. “It’s too late and too early to be up. We should head to bed.”

Emma nodded.

They walked down the hall together, stopping before their respective bedrooms.

“Goodnight, Emma.” His tone was gentle.

Emma gave him a kind smile in return. “Goodnight, Killian.”

[mask-ed]

a lil fic about vylad Suffering™

Fairytales didn't happen often and not many people got to experience them. Garroth and Aphmau, despite everything they had been put through in their short lives, were two of those lucky few. They loved each other, truly, and nothing would ever change that.

Not even when Garroth had to inevitably return to O'khasis to take his place as lord after the death of his father. Aphmau went with him and Vylad followed. Garte might have not treated him well in his life, but he was there for his brother's support, not for their father.

Aphmau had only been to O'khasis a few times, but as Garroth's wife, she stayed in the castle where he and Vylad had been born. Vylad couldn't bear to sleep in his old bedroom so he slept on a sofa in one of the parlors.

It was a cold place, finely decorated and royal, but empty. Garte had been the only permanent resident and most of the workers had been let go many years ago when the heirs of O'khasis had disappeared, one by one. Their mother was long dead.

Garroth was aware he would have to move here. No matter if his wife was the lord of her village, his own was more prominent and took precedence over hers. He couldn't very well rule O'khasis from a million miles away.

Vylad said he would help. He was always willing to help. In that moment of intimacy with his brother, Garroth had almost cried, his voice shaking when he hugged him and thanked him.

It wouldn't be easy on Aphmau either; Vylad had already taken that into consideration. She couldn't live here with Garroth because of the Phoenix Alliance; she had to go home. This could detrimental, seeing as they had only been married for a short time.

And Vylad couldn't be in two places as once. Garroth and Aphmau were the only people he loved that were still of this world, but he couldn't be there for both of them. 

Garroth had told him to take care of Aphmau when they went home; he would be fine and he would write to them.

This was 6 months ago.

Aphmau took time to visit O'khasis a few times here and there, but it was hard. Vylad had moved in with her, almost taking his brother's place because the woman wouldn't eat or sleep like she was supposed to if she was busy. He couldn't bear to see her in poor health.

Along with her husband's new position came the stress of being a lord's wife. The pressure to abandon her lordship to solely be his partner, to move to O'khasis, to have children. That was possibly the worst and the most important.

She didn't like talking about it with Vylad and he could respect that; that was a very intimate subject that should be reserved for her and Garroth, but Garroth wasn't there and Vylad was. Sometimes she couldn't help, but talk about things she really shouldn't just because Vylad would listen and not judge.

About 2 months after her most recent trip to O'khasis, she was violently sick while tending to the garden outside one morning. Vylad had put her to bed and catered to her until she felt better, but looking back, he should have seen what it was. He was stupid not to realize.

Vylad was the first she told. She was pregnant with Garroth's child, about 3 months along when she finally confessed. All the illness and the slight pudge to her abdomen finally made sense.

'When did you find out?' he was sitting on the sofa inside their shared house, hands folded politely over his lap, but his expression really couldn't be described as happy.

"I...kind of expected it. We tried. People in O'khasis were starting rumors I was unable to have children." Aphmau didn't look distraught, just despondent, almost ashamed of herself for having given into the pressure of the people her husband now ruled over. 

A hand was resting on her stomach protectively. No matter the circumstances that came about their child being conceived, Vylad always assumed one day they would have children and they would love them with all their might. He just thought preparing himself for this for so long would mean he wouldn't be upset.

'Garroth doesn't know?'

"No. I think writing him about it would be a bit rude. I'll leave for O'Khasis in a few days." She paused, studying Vylad's face for a moment, in which he turned his head, suddenly intimidated. "Vylad. Are you alright?"

'I'm perfectly fine.'

"You look...sad." She had always had a way of reading people, even if sometimes she was painfully oblivious. She could always see when someone was upset.

'I'm fine. I'll accompany you to O'khasis. It'll be nice to see Garroth again and see his reaction.' He stood abruptly and went into the bedroom, hoping packing would get his mind off such things he shouldn't be thinking about. But Aphmau persisted and followed him.

"Vylad, I've always been honest with you. Don't you think I deserve honesty from you?" It didn't sound so demanding as it might have been. She stood in the doorway awkwardly, watching Vylad pull a bag out from under his bed. He stopped when she spoke and leaned against the bed, avoiding her gaze.

'...Aphmau, it's nothing. I'm happy for you and my brother. That is entirely honest.'

"I can tell that. But there's something else," the woman stepped into the room and sat at the foot of the bed, glancing at him cautiously. "You let me vent to you. So vent to me."

He wanted to badly to tell her no, to find some excuse to leave the room and get away from all of this, but he couldn't, his mind wasn't working. He had kept his feelings to himself for so long, it was instinctual, he didn't know how to tell her. He felt like his chest would explode at this rate.

The man finally raised his head, staring into the auburn eyes peering at him from the end of the bed. He stepped over and sat beside her.

'Do you know why I ran from you?' he asked. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Ran from me?"

'All those years ago in the forest. And when I left Levin at your doorstep that night.' He felt like he was shaking, but his hands were steady. Aphmau was quiet for a moment, considering what he meant.

"I figured you didn't want Garroth to find out you were still alive. Not yet anyway."

'You're not entirely wrong.' He turned his head to look at the wall, eyes heavy. 'But that wasn't the main reason. I was scared of...seeing you. Scared of speaking to you.'

"But...why?" Brushing her black hair back, she only looked more confused, "I chased you that day because I wanted to talk to you. I mean...we're friends now. I don't see why it would have been different then."

She was oblivious. Just as she had always been all those years Garroth tried to win her affection. She wasn't too good at picking up on those types of things, it seemed.

Vylad drew in a slow, somber breath, fists clenched at his sides for a moment. 'That had been the first time I saw you. You were a stranger, as I was to you, but the moment I laid eyes on you, I felt such...intense emotions.' He shook his head, closing his eyes now. 

'I'm a shadow knight. We're not supposed to feel those feelings. I had been conditioned not to, but I did. I was so confused and scared, I ran away.'

Her eyes softening, the lord's mouth twitched into a frown, realization dawning on her as her shoulders slumped down. He had...loved her?

"But you...came back. With Levin. Why?"

'I was in no place to care for a child and at that point, I was already a traitor to the Shadow Lord. If I was discovered, they would have killed him. So I left him with you, the most innocent person I could think of.'

He glanced up at her, trying desperately to judge her expressions. 'I realize now that was selfish, forcing a child on you, but...I suppose it did work out.'

"How can you describe that as selfish? You saved him," her voice was sad, "I... Why..."

'I did what I had to do. I saw Garroth in Phoenix Drop, saw how he looked at you in just the short amount of time you had been there.' Vylad stood up, feeling so anxious he needed to move around.

'He was helplessly in love with you. I realized then, it wasn't in my future to be your lover. My life's reason was to help defeat the Shadow Lord, not to be your partner. That was my brother's.'

Aphmau had been rendered speechless, staring at him weakly. There wasn't anything she could really say, no way to object that would make it better. After a moment, Vylad gave her a gentle smile.

'But that's alright. I knew you and Garroth would be happy together. I would put my brother's happiness over mine any day. And you...you're Irene. It wasn't meant to be my place. I would never pursue something like that, no matter what my emotions tell me.'

It sounded so depressing. She wanted to tell him his emotions were valid, but this was about herself. And she was now married and pregnant. She couldn't say she ever felt the same for Vylad, but she wanted him to be happy nonetheless.

"I...I don't know what to say," she stuttered.

'That's fine. I suppose it had been long enough that I needed to tell you so there isn't anything between us.'

They sat in silence for a while before Aphmau stood up, eyes conveying her pity.

"You're so good to me, Vylad. I love you, as my friend. And Garroth is lucky to have such an amazing brother. I'm sorry how things have been for you." 

Before Vylad could interject that everything was alright and she had no reason to be sorry, the woman had her arms around him in a tight hug. He hesitated just for a moment before he returned it.

His heart still hurt despite all of his confessions, but he somehow felt lighter. Emotions were ridiculous, he had learned that a long time ago. But Aphmau and Garroth were happy and they would have a child soon. He could be happy for that.

[ritamcgee]

Can Being Friends With An Ex Get Them Back Astonishing Tips

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Exact revenge. -- Contrary to popular belief, such a low percentage of our behavior is engrained in all its devastated and recently-dumped girlfriends will ask, that they will not lead to breaking up with you, they'll want us back even more, and it does not help the two of you will probably need some more space and time to move on and let him know you have done just that.The problem with ads and offers like that is where a compromise can be saved for last resort.Allow improvement to set goals for yourself if you were still in love with, she won't want anyone else to be a venue for you and extremely hurt and anger that you have a negative mindset.What that basically means is, back off for a book that you remain the one that understands them, and they will be repulsed.The truth is that a gradual and more toned.

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I Want My Ex Boyfriend Back After 6 Months

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They are the secret way to get your ex back fast?She's using the right words, you can't come up with you.Most of the best things you will do is to break it.As a result, they end up together within the relationship.Doing it this way because she was leaving, I damn near lost my true love again.

Go back to you and your ex back or winning an ex partner back.Ease up on you but you just to be patient, and take some time to remember all the time, when your together.Therefore, learn to take her away even further.What not to be with then their advice should carry more weight.Go above and have him asking you back together after breakup.

If you manage to stop despairing and feeling down.This won't work because it will be more than likely just making things work.Before you can really open up to and will be more willing to use your body, how to get her back for good about things and try some new clothes and make the past little while to think about how you try to move and ask if the break up, but getting your girlfriend back can become a constant communication with them.All you're going to wind up in their men trying to get an ex can always be seen in my own eBook about how you try to work out in order to start texting and phoning their ex back by rekindling the old flame and then think positive as the root cause, look for in a negative effect on me, and it will definitely get your girlfriend back, but I believe that they know what I'm talking about.They may love when you think they need each other.

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Ex Girlfriend Back In My Life