#it’s the DICHOTOMY 👏

[unfortunate17]

Besties, I don’t give a fuck if Simon isn’t Wille’s first - the narrative (and as I’ve learned from some of y’all - Lisa and Rojda in interviews) just implies that he was & having self proclaimed rebel prince Wille fall in love with the first person he fucks is endlessly hilarious to me so I like to roll with it

That post was more about how I think Wille knew he was queer on some level before he met Simon 😃

[anghraine]

Speaking of "I cannot with royal mystique," I am firmly Team Human but damn it'd be nice if we weren't always stuck being royalists :(

Gwen is about to encounter Queen Jennah for the first time in the personal story!

IIRC, all human PCs are pretty much immediately railroaded into being uncritical monarchists. That was one thing for Althea, my aristocratic human PC, who I imagined coming from a firmly royalist family. But Gwen grew up in abject poverty on the streets of Jennah's capital, and one of her closest friends from the street origin story is an open revolutionary.

I've always imagined Gwen as not quite as extreme or prone to conspiracies as her friend Alice, but like her, skeptical about Queen Jennah and basically hostile to royal and aristocratic power. It's reinforced in her case by her strong Ascalonian partisanship; she's no Separatist, but like many Ascalonians, Gwen does not accept or appreciate Jennah's claim to be regent of Ascalon. In my headcanon, this was actually one of the ways she was at odds with her Seraph sister Deborah before Deborah went missing.

Gwen doesn't want Jennah dead and she's not actively working against her or anything, in part because she's more interested in fixing small-scale wrongs than in open revolution, and in part because her political feelings are mostly focused on hating aristocrats and Charr at the moment.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure her default feeling about some minister vs the queen is basically 🍿, so this is the first point where the story in my head really conflicts with what's going to be on the screen.

[girl4music]

Comment by @LaineyBug2020: “You keep saying that's not Willow, but that she's actually thinking the things she's saying. You're right on both counts. This is Dark Willow. She is a part of Willow as a whole. We all have that Darkness inside of us, no matter how good we try to be. This was illustrated by how easy it was for Willow to let the magic take over. She repressed a lot of herself when we first met her. Joss is showing us why we shouldn't do that. Remember how easily she was led to the demon that got released into the computer?

Remember how she never dealt with her feelings with Xander and let herself get involved in an adulterous relationship? Until now, she kept herself so repressed that anytime she tapped into more power, you would see her eyes turn black.

Then, when tragedy strikes, she’s so used to repressing that she just represses the part of herself that feels anything but vengeance. Vengeance is a powerful place to exist, much more powerful than grief. Grief is powerless. She has let herself be powerless for too long.

When we deny parts of ourselves, all we do is create imbalances and extreme dichotomies. Two extremes can't share the same place, so that's when dissociation occurs. Dark Willow is completely dissociated from her humanity, so there is nothing to temper the base impulses or intrusive thoughts.

Which is why she says what she says to Dawn.

Eventually (without spoiling too much) we get to see White Willow, the other end of the spectrum. But we don't get to see it until Willow learns how to honor, balance and thus control every part of her.

Joss uses this theme with Oz's arc when he has to leave to connect with his wolf so he can control it.

He also uses it with Spike vs Angel. Angel is a represser and a brooder. He shuns the 'Angelus' part of him when he is cursed with a soul, to the point where Angelus is able to keep secrets from him and be a constant threat. Spike accepted his Demon nature and learned to be good with it instead of in spite of it when his ability to harm people was taken away. He fought for a soul with his Demon nature fully participating so there was never a danger of him losing his soul. There was a blip he faced with The First, but he faced it right away and became stronger for it.

Even Buffy has to do this. Faith is an example of what can happen if we repress. Buff struggles throughout the show's run with honoring every part of herself to stay balanced and powerful. Especially after she's brought back.

That's what we can take away from this theme. Feel and honour every part of yourself. We are complex, but when in balance, we are POWERFUL.”

👏👏👏👏👏

Wonderfully fucking said. Wow!

One of Willow’s most repressed traits is sadism. Vampire Willow expresses and exhibits it with abandon. But there’s a reason why she’s one of the most sadistic vampires that we ever get to see in the Buffyverse.

It’s not because of the demon who took over Willow’s body. It’s because of Willow. Willow’s repressed sadism is something I love talking about because it’s such a fascinating subject when it comes to her characterisation.

You witness tidbits of it every now and again but it’s used for light humour. To break the tension in the narrative. We never think much of it until it’s used for a different purpose such as here.

Iconic Willow one-liners like “Occasionally, I’m callous and strange.” And “If you hurt her, I will beat you to death with a shovel.” and “He deserves a torturous and slow death by spider bites.”

Innocent funny one-liners or repressed sadism? Yes.

She was never as innocent or pure as she seemed. There was very much a storm brewing inside of this one and Season 6 said let it rain!

And it’s probably the best fucking payoff of all the built-up character representation and development in the entire show. I adore it.

[foreveranevilregal]

I posted 1,862 times in 2022

That's 1,050 more posts than 2021!

709 posts created (38%)

1,153 posts reblogged (62%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@whitebeltwriter

@love-sleep-ship

@singinprincess

@dinneratgrannys

@mswong

I tagged 1,858 of my posts in 2022

#pepa madrigal - 376 posts

#encanto - 307 posts

#asks - 237 posts

#felix madrigal - 214 posts

#text post - 200 posts

#pepa x felix - 174 posts

#regina mills - 171 posts

#konstrakta - 137 posts

#anonymous - 137 posts

#eurovision - 126 posts

Longest Tag: 130 characters

#did you know that not taking the thing that helps your brain make dopamine when you’re already low on dopamine makes things worse?

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Me: *hits replay on In Corpore Sano for the 238th time*

Spotify: there are 39 other entries this year, do you want to listen to any of them?

Me:

292 notes - Posted May 9, 2022

#4

Pepa: I made a hurricane on my wedding day and it ruined everything!

Félix, probably: holy shit my wife is so powerful I love her so much

311 notes - Posted February 1, 2022

#3

Something I haven’t seen discussed here on Tumblr is the dichotomy between science and religion in In Corpore Sano. Most people can see that Konstrakta is dressed like a healthcare worker, head to toe in white, but not everyone knows the significance of the people surrounding her dressed in black. They strongly resemble Orthodox priests (Serbia is an Orthodox Christian country). Along with them, the melody itself has a very liturgical feel to it, especially that “Bože zdravlja” chant (entreating God to grant health). If you don’t have health insurance (“nemam knjižicu”) and the healthcare system has washed its hands of you (quite literally performed by Konstrakta), religion can feel like the only place to turn in the hope for good health. And then if that doesn’t work either, the priests are already there to perform last rites.

342 notes - Posted May 5, 2022

#2

Carolina Gaitán before recording Pepa’s lines in English: *sipping tea* okay let’s do this

Carolina Gaitán before recording Pepa’s lines in Spanish: *throwing back double espresso* okay let’s DO this!!

372 notes - Posted March 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

…anyway

BITI 👏 ZDRAVA 👏 BITI 👏 ZDRAVA 👏 BITI 👏 ZDRAVA 👏 BIT ✋ BIT 🤚 BIT ✋ BITI 👏 ZDRAVA 👏

472 notes - Posted May 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[kudosmyhero]

Daredevil (vol. 1) #116: Two Flew Over the Owl's Nest!

Read Date: June 16, 2023 Cover Date: December 1974 ● Writer: Steve Gerber ● Penciler: Gene Colan ● Inker: Vince Colletta ● Colorist: Petra Goldberg ● Letterer: John Costanza ● Editor: Roy Thomas ●

**HERE BE SPOILERS: Skip ahead to the fan art/podcast to avoid spoilers

Reactions As I Read: ● oo, I like when Lawyer!Matt has issue with the actions of Vigilante!Daredevil. it’s an interesting dichotomy that I think should be explored more. I’m really early in DD’s career at this point, though, so I’ll hazard a guess that it has indeed been covered in depth at some point

● I almost forgot that the Owl is in this issue! ● I ain’t even mad that Matt is back in San Francisco ● 👏👏👏👏

Synopsis: With his Billy-Club destroyed, Daredevil rushes back to his New York hotel room with a grappling hook and some rope. There he finds Foggy and explains that he was mugged and the crooks even stole his Billy-Club in order to cover for his secret identity. As he is trying to explain to Candace and Foggy that the Death-Stalker is seemingly dead and the evidence regarding Operation: Sulfer have been destroyed, Matt gets a call from the Black Widow. When he asks if he can call back, the Widow angrily hangs up the phone without explaining what the emergency is.

A few days later after Matt Murdock has arranged to have the charges against Candace Nelson dropped, Daredevil travels back to San Francisco to see what the problem with Black Widow is. Returning to her former mansion home, he finds that she has been evicted and that new tenants have taken over.

Deciding to head over to police headquarters to see if Paul Carson knows where Natasha is, Daredevil stops to bust a group of crooks. When one of them grabs a little girl and holds her at gun point, Daredevil is hard pressed to do anything when suddenly the Black Widow drops out of the air and knocks the gunman out. With all the crooks kayoed, Daredevil and Black Widow embrace. This lets their guard down long enough for one of the crooks to make a break for it. Daredevil is unable to track him due to the noise from the gathered crowd.

The crook enters his employers secret hideout, who turns out to be Daredevil's old foe the Owl. The Owl kills his lackey and decides to deal with Daredevil before continuing his criminal operations in San Francisco. As Daredevil and the Black Widow are talking about her current financial woes when they are attacked by the Owl and a helicopter full of his gun toting henchmen.

During the fight Daredevil is scratched by the Owl's ring which is laced with a fast acting poison which makes Daredevil and easy defeat. When the Black Widow attempts to defend herself she is grazed across the forehead with a bullet shot from the helicopter and is knocked out as well. With both heroes unconscious the Owl has them loaded up in his chopper so that he can deal with them as he sees fit.

(https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Daredevil_Vol_1_116)

Fan Art: The Owl (Leland Owlsley) render by Egg84

Accompanying Podcast: ● Joshua and Jamie Do Daredevil - episode 19

[contentgreenearth]

JUNGIAN TYPOLOGY POST #13: SIMPLIFIED ORIGINAL JUNGIAN TYPOLOGY (SOJT) AND THE MBTI ARE NOT THE SAME

This was a post that I should have made eons ago, but I feel compelled to make it now, because there's a group of MBTI purists who are trying to push their followers to believe Simplified Original Jungian Typology is not Jungian. Sounds crazy, but it's true 🥴

So I guess I'm on a quest to defend Simplified Original Jungian Typology, here, as well as show the differences between the two systems. So let's start.

Simplified Original Jungian Typology (SOJT) had its origin in Europe, among Jung's pupils and their pupils. It types people exactly how Jung did in Psychological Types. It types both your cognition and your differentiation.

So on my blog , when I talk about SOJT type families, I'm talking about all the SOJT differentiation patterns that have the same cognition. It uses terms like, let's take the type ESFP for example, Se-f, fe-S, Se, S-f, etc. to describe the different differentiation patterns that all have the same cognition. What do all those examples have in common? An Se dominant function, and an Fe auxiliary function. They just have different differentiation patterns, for example S-f alternates between Se Fe and Si Fi for the conscious, hence, we don't know whether to label the person e or i, so we just label them S-f (and that's the best description I've written yet for undifferentiated attitude 👏👏👏Yay!).

The Se-f, in this case, would be the fully differentiated type. All fully differentiated types look this way. I've had some of those MBTI purists say that's not Jungian, because it doesn't say "Se-fe". Guys, this is not the MBTI. This is SOJT. It's a totally different typology, and if "e" appears anywhere in the annotation, it means the whole conscious is extroverted; and if "i" appears anywhere in the annotation, it mens the whole conscious is introverted.

One final interesting note I will say about SOJT before I move on, and talk about the MBTI. That's the difference in grades between SOJT and the MBTI. SOJT consistently scores 80% or higher on several metrics, such as accuracy, reliability, validity and test-retest. The MBTI, on the other hand, consistently fails in all those metrics, scoring less than 60% , and that is all forms of the MBTI, including the dichotomy test from the official MBTI 😳, which is the highest ranking of all MBTI methods. If you're wondering why people who are really vested in the MBTI would try to steer you away from SOJT, look no further. It's because they don't want you to know you're mistyped, and they don't want to lose business 🤫

Now, we move on to the MBTI. Dang, where do I begin? There are are so many factions of MBTI, it's not funny. You have Grant Stackers (probably the majority of the community), you have MBTI purists (who use eeii and iiee order/IJs are judgers/IPs are perceivers), you have people who totally type by temperaments (Kiersey, Berens and CS Joseph), you have people who only believe the dichotomy test is valid, etc, and I could go on. I'll just leave it there.

The whole MBTI community is fragmented, the functions mean different things, depending on whose method you're using. The purists have the right and *only* right definitions of the functions, but they tend to disfavor the functions, and prefer to use MBTI facets, MBTI letter cluster behaviors and temperaments over the functions 🤔 That's sadly, where even the purists falter. They fail to realize that *nothing* about the MBTI is accurate.

I don't think I need to share the background story of the MBTI, because I'm pretty sure anyone who reads this knows the story of how the MBTI originated. But Briggs and Myers definitely interpreted Jung their own way. Then Grant got hold of Briggs and Myers' theory, and created his own. And every MBTI theory after Grant is an interpretation of Grant. The MBTI is like a massive, unending, "telephone game", where the message at the end of the line is extremely altered from the original message, and the original message is lost

That's exactly why I tell people to not even bother to use the MBTI to figure out their MBTI type, and to use Simplified Original Jungian Typology and DISC instead. Oh, and by the way, DISC is the only other typology that scores 80% or higher on all the metrics I listed above for SOJT. Yep. SOJT and DISC is the way to go, if you really want to figure out your MBTI type. I tell people that all the time

[yanderememes]

Bro you could rant to me about MBTI for hours. 😩 Jokes on you I'm into that shit. But fr I couldn't agree with you more abt how stupid that stereotype is that thinkers enjoy kicking puppies and watching the world burn. It just perpetuates so much misinformation and makes thinkers lean into that heartless stereotype / mistype themselves into thinking theyre smth else. MBTI is a very neutral tool (morally neutral) and I hope more people see it that way! 👏👏

Exactly! Sick and tired of people typing others based on black and white dichotomies and stereotypes instead of functions! Tbh, I've met thinkers who are more kind and affectionate than feeler types! So this whole "thinkers are heartless bastards" stereotype just ain't it.

LOL glad to hear you enjoy my MBTI fanatics 🤣 the last post about Giorno being an INTJ and not INFJ has been sitting on my mind for a long time so THANK YOU ANON for giving me permission to unleash the beast 😌

MBTI really is neutral and an amazing tool for self-discovery! I know one of the biggest criticisms is that it puts people in a box but imo, you'll only believe that if you keep pushing that narrative. MBTI is so much more and lands on a huge spectrum! 💓

[maneskinss]

The same way IWBYS had the dichotomy of wanting to play two opposite roles to appease someone, I loved that Mammamia played with the dichotomy of personal preferences in public versus private life. The way the chorus and versus switch between people's perceptions versus how they authentically live their lives is so smart and fun! Loved it!

THIS! ☝️👏

[homoerotic-shonen-rival-showdown]

ALRIGHT KIDDOS ROUND 2

YOU WILL VOTE TEAM TRAUMATIZED CHILDREN. FOR THE HE

👏CATBOY👏GOD👏

ASAKURA HAO THE MEOW MEOW EVER

HE'S LITERALLY ON A TEAM WITH A CULT CREATED TO KILL HIM AND A BUNCH OF UNRELATED FUCKED UP CHILDREN CMON MAN HAOSWEEP

behold the villain's wiki blurb:

he's soso fucked up isn't he neat

he canonically doesn't believe in money and his main antagonist in flowers is the GUY WHO INVENTED CAPITALISM. ANARCHIST ICON.

did I mention that he is also LITERALLY A GOD. god + anarchy + trauma + mommy issues + his cat killed him once

he has a non-evil twin brother and he will sometimes just Show Up to hang out with that brother even though one of his brother's besties is doing this on sight every time

also the only reason humanity is still around is because THIS HAPPENED

"sorry I can't genocide all of humanity my mom said no :("

he also does THIS once. that kid is his nephew btw

he also just. recreated a perfect version of his brother at age 16 to hang out with in his empty god commune. just because???

failboy/girlboss dichotomy

you will vote

or I

what's my most annoying tangent

I explain the entirety of my bsd x sk au in GREAT DETAIL throughout MANY LONG POSTS

that might be a terrible threat but I'm doing it I'm threatening you

minor bracket semifinal

[eggwhiteswithspinach]

👏 Dichotomy Of Desire

[island6artscenter]

"All Along The Wires" (沿着电线) 🌿

We assume that uncaged birds are free. What if we are wrong about that? Cities, cats, windmills, airplanes—they all seem to hold down the bird that wishes to fly unfettered. If birds are limited by their environment, what about people? Søren Kierkegaard wrote that “either/or” isn’t really a choice. For Kierkegaard, the point is more about preserving possibilities. Share bikes allow us to have a free-range attitude, giving us the best of both worlds. We can ride to our heart’s desire and just dump the bike when we feel like it. Applying these ideas to the artworld reveals a unique situation. Contemporary art is predicated on two ideas: that possibilities abound, and that artists and viewers have free will. But most artist-viewer relationships are mediated by institutions like galleries and museums which reward artists and viewers for participating correctly. Everyone involved has been totalized by the institution, conditioned to processes artworks into a set of either/or dichotomies. The easiest key to success here? Self-censorship. Careful, methodical nothingness wins treasures. But going against the grain wins hearts. Go ahead and break the spell, give us a clap. 👏

AVAILABLE // For price inquiries: terry@island6.org

Unique Edition, Shanghai 2020

#LiuDao #island6 #Shanghai #China #newmediaart #contemporaryart #artcollective #LEDart #artgallery  #M50 #artcollector #artexhibit #artforsale #artdistrict #digitalart #artandtechnology #interactiveart #shanghaistreetstyle 

[gloinksnumber42069]

👏 THANK YOU 👏

I'm SICK of being looked at and being told that in other countries it is much more uncomfortable.

OKAY?? AND THEY'RE TRAUMATIZED TOO. THEY'RE OVERLY STRESSED. THAT DOESN'T MEAN THRIVING.

I'm SICK of being looked at and being reputtled with "YOU ABSOLUTELY can make it work. You figure it out and find ways--"

And live to resent your child and use religion to copium your way around the fact you use food+drink+sex+times of sloth to go feel any semblance of healing or comfort. We all do it its fucking human it's ALMOST like we've been around for centuries only to watch us never advance from the same set of fucking problems that fuck it, I'm bored of heaven and hell. I already knew the edge lord epiphany around the corner of heaven is hell or living is hell and it's what you make of it and on top of that we can't even fucking chose within our communities how OUR OWN FUCKING COMMUNITY SHOULD BE RUN

Fuck FUCK NATIONAL

Fuck FUCK STATEHOOD

I can't comphrend what the fuck other nations are let alone other states and we already know taking advantage of resources is BAD if it's not excruciatingly precisely benefits for most or at least negative effects can be minimized.

NOPE INSTEAD WE GET CORPORTATIONS AND CLASS WARFARE. AND ITS STAYED LIKE THIS FOR GENERATIONS FUCK THIS IM SO DAMN BORED OF LIVING IN THIS PERCISE DICHOTOMY BECAUSE NOTHING IS GETTING DONE AND WHY THE FUCK ARE SOMETHINGS ENDING UP BACKWARDS AGAIN??

Why even have damn free will with the determinism destined from generations not HAVING SOME DAMN COMPASSIONATE GODLY LEADERSHIP.

I know I don't shut up about this but frankly not enough people are angry about the 5-day/40 hour workweek (and I am AWARE a lot of people work even more than that). I feel like a lot more people should be absolutely furious that we only really have two days a week and some occasional hours in the evening to socialise, run errands, do chores, or relax.

It's no wonder so many people are profoundly lonely and disconnected from their communities when maintaining a social life in what little free time we have is incredibly difficult. If you have kids, a second job, a very long commute, or other responsibilities, it's nearly impossible.

We literally aren't meant to live like this and I'll never stop being shocked how many people just take it as the natural state of things and don't want to throw a brick through a billionaire's window every time they think of it.

[the-golden-comet]

This is fantastic!! I love the dichotomies of hungry and tender, restrained yet desperate. Paints both sides very well. Beautiful emotion work in these sentences!! Well done 👏👏👏

✨Seven(ish) Sentence Sunday 🧞‍♂️✨

Thank you to the lovely Mawce aka @justabigoldnerd for this Seven Sentence Sunday tag! Always a pleasure! ✨

Editing back through my work and I stumbled into this asshole. 🙃

Mal staggered with a half-empty bottle of airplane wine in hand, that daddy’s money paid for. Unlike his cohort, Noah had to work hard to get into his graduate program; Without his scholarships, unpaid internships, and paid TA and tutor jobs on top of being a full-time student, there was no way that Noah would have been able to afford his tuition. His parents kicked him out early on, so he didn’t have the luxury of wasting time nor money. He was there to get his degree, land a decent-paying job in his field of interest, and get the fuck out.

The well-libated colleague “accidentally” spilled some of the alcohol all over Noah’s front, and he appeared to have been aiming for the laptop. “—!!” Noah reacted just in time, pulling his equipment away from the splash zone as Mal laughed cruelly.

Definitely some contention here on all sides. 🤔✨

As always, I will leave this as an +open tag and gently alert the tag list. Happy Sunday! 💫✨

✨👇Tag list for writing snippets below. DM me if you’d like to be added 👇✨

Tag List for writing tidbits (lmk if you want + or -)

@autism-purgatory , @talesofsorrowandofruin , @ragin-cajun-fangirl , @wyked-ao3 , @the-inkwell-variable ,

@glasshouses-and-stones , @alinacapellabooks , @gioiaalbanoart , @tragedycoded , @deanwax ,

@dyrewrites , @honeybewrites , @drchenquill , @paeliae-occasionally , @lychhiker-writes ,

@thatuselesshuman , @kaylinalexanderbooks , @katenewmanwrites , @zackprincebooks , @fantasy-things-and-such ,

@finickyfelix , @billybatsonmylove , @madi-konrad , @houseplantblank , @far-cry-from-finality ,

@froggy-pposto , @fractured-shield , @avaseofpeonies , @topazadine , @thecoolerlucky ,

@theaistired , @willtheweaver , @rivenantiqnerd @somethingclevermahogony , @noxxytocin ,

@leahnardo-da-veggie , @addicted2coke-theothercoke , @illarian-rambling , @mysticstarlightduck , @the-letterbox-archives ,

@ominous-feychild , @saturnine-saturneight , @words-after-midnight , @sableglass , @cowboybrunch ,

@yourpenpaldee , @moltenwrites , @pixies-love-envy , @davycoquette , @writeahurricane ,

@nczaversnick , @greenfinchwriter , @oliolioxenfreewrites , @lavender-gloom , @smellyrottentrees ,

@aintgonnatakethis , @thecomfywriter , @pluppsauthor , @michellekarnold , @flurrysahin ,

@authorcoledipalo , @jadeglas , @spookyceph , @astramachina , @48lexr ,

@inseasofgreen , @agirlandherquill , @saebasanart , @leatafandom , @justabigoldnerd ,

@pippinoftheshire , @just-emis-blog, @aalinaaaaa , @badscientist , @dearunreliablenarrator

@worlds-tallest-fairy , @rhikasa, @eccaiia , @theink-stainedfolk , @theverumproject

@theprissythumbelina , @riveriafalll , @revenancy , @inadequatecowboy , @amielbjacobs ,

@patternwelded-quill , @sugarchains , @garthcelyn , @prettytothink-so , @caitlinbirenbaum ,

@winvyre , @speaknowbuckley , @lamuradex , @wintherlywords , @sharkblizzardblogs ,

@dragoninatrenchcoat , @darekasama , @phynewrites ,

[rom-e-o]

@quill-pen

Oh, I LOVE the idea of the dichotomy between the pics! There was this impish flirting tone before when they were single ladies, but now? FULL-ON SEXYYY. 👏💕

I gotta ask a follow-up: do you see the girls having different styles that they reach for/vibe with? Like themes for their shoots?

I see TeTe leaning only Hollywood glam with feathered robes, satin accents, things like that. Connie? Absolutely office siren/after hours play girl vibes (because of course). 😏

I LOVE the idea of Ethel’s having that gothic, seductress spin on it. It’s a bit unexpected from her just going off face value/aesthetic, which I think makes the end result all the more exciting!

Inspired by recent pics, imagine:

The Pack girls get some money together during the early days in the cottage and do a boudoir photoshoot. To have fun, lift each other’s spirits, hype each other up (“oh my gosh, how is it LEGAL for someone to look that beautiful?!”) and hype each other up! Kind of like their lingerie parties, but with souvenirs, haha!

Then, when they’re all with their hubbies, they do it again. The pictures are saucier and more private this time, and ladies like Nancy, Ethel and Hela and others jump in to join. Wouldn’t shock me if TeTe did the same.

Then each lucky man gets a fancy book of photos from their wifey from the day, as a lovely present. 💕

This gives Valentine’s vibes, but honestly, they could probably do it anytime with how down bad these couples are for each other. 😏

Yes, I LOVE this idea. So much fun for these ladies and a bonding experience to empower each other!

Also, imagining the hubbies getting to see the original photos at some time in the relationship.😏 And then getting the second photos later on.🥵 It's like a before and after sort of thing. Before hubby: sexy, but more of a cute, flirty sexy. After hubby: the sensual, risque, scandalous sexiness of a woman who's found the person who brings that out in her and makes her feel safe and confident.

These men have no idea how they landed so well on their feet.

[full-of-recs]

Holy 🔥🔥🔥, not only is this probably some of the smuttiest and hottest stuff I’ve read in a LONG time but the dichotomy is just melting my brain???! The title of this story is genius and really capturing the essence of these two characters. I 👏love👏this👏

bb / gg, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader

summary: Jeon Jungkook is the lead singer in a rock band and failed his Biology class last semester, so he has to take remedial classes over the summer. You're the Biology TA, double major in Psychology and Biology, watching him freak out over his make-up exam because he had overslept. Both of you are surrounded by rumors. Does the title stand for bad boy / good girl or bad bitch / good guy? Who knows.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; not the healthiest dynamic tbh; slight angst due to perceived unrequited love; smut (fem reader, D/s dynamics, begging, scratching / marking, choking, handjob (he is still wearing underwear), multiple orgasms, cowgirl, hair pulling, edging / orgasm denial, cock ring usage, m-masturbation, cum-eating); non-idol!BTS – rock singer, sub!Jungkook x studious, dom!reader

yes, it's SOWOOZOO JK, both the first yellow tropical look and the shredded black shirt look; for those who wanted him to be dom!JK, there is a moment when he is but not in the way you think because that's how I operate

--

Jeon Jungkook was a bad boy.

Wore too much black, dyed his hair too much, had tattoos, always had girls hanging around him. Sang in a rock band on the weekends, played electric guitar, played the game of how-many-numbers-can-I-get tonight? Never gave a girl his leather jacket to wear but was happy to buy her a drink and flirt with her until she got hot with arousal.

You were a good girl.

Always wore a blazer. Crisp white dress shirt and pleated skirt underneath, usually in a dark color. Sensible heels, but always heels. Did too many units a semester because you were double majoring in psychology and biology. Always arrived to class early, always turned in your assignments on time, always turned in your tests early and aced that shit. Took physics with calculus even though you didn’t have to because it was the harder one and you wanted a challenge.

-

Against the wall, shoving a fist into the neck, lips to lips, teeth snapping, hand travelling down, whimpering pleas and harsh growls, keep crying, I like it, ecstasy and pain, nails to skin. Tearing clothes off, biting, marking, I own you, and then, yes, you do, mouth and tongue, aching pleasure, cocked eyebrow, mocking the pathetic whines and cries, stopping right before the end, no, please, I’ve been good, and, you take what you get, hand fitting onto the neck, squeezing the sides, eyes rolling back, skin to skin, bruising slaps that would be seen tomorrow in the mirror, traced with shaking fingers and pants of an open mouth, moaning at the memory of sky-high pleasure while lightheaded and thoughtless, desperate to do it again.

-

There was a rumor.

Everyone liked Jeon Jungkook. He had two smiles, an endearing one and a teasing one. Both encapsulated the kind of person he was, honest and playful. He always sang with conviction, he rapped with savagery, and his lyrics were always from the heart. He always hung out with his bandmates after their performances at bars and interacted with those that came up to him. No one ever said Jungkook was mean or rude in any way.

And yet.

There was a rumor.

A rumor that Jeon Jungkook was taken.

He was the kind of guy that always made sure a drunk girl got home safe even though he didn’t know them. Paid for their taxi and everything. He focused a lot on his music and writing lyrics he thought would connect with others while taking into account his band members. He always told the truth if a girl confessed to him, saying he wasn’t looking right now, that he was very sorry if she thought otherwise, that there was someone he was already interested in.

-

“Oi.”

You slammed a hand onto the tabletop and Jeon Jungkook jumped, the shredded black shirt he was wearing falling down his shoulder, revealing his ink black tattoos on his tan skin. He was wearing a black tank top underneath.

“What’s with you? You missed the exam for your remedial class and you’ve spent the past ten minutes spacing out at your make-up exam,” you barked, pointing to his empty exam sheet. “You haven’t even filled out you name.”

Jungkook swallowed hard. “S… Sorry.”

You frowned. Why was he apologizing to you? Honestly, why did you sign up for this summer TA position again? Oh, right, money and credits. Hmph. It was really just an excuse for the professor to slack off while you did the tedious things like grading and watching over idiots that skipped class. Sorry, overslept. Hung over, probably, since this was the Jeon Jungkook. Rockstar, hottie, famous in his own way.

Whatever.

He could be Jesus Christ and you would still be scolding him for missing his remedial Biology exam.

“Fill out your name so at least I can fail you properly.”

Not that it mattered, since you knew who he was. He didn’t know you knew who he was, and you had zero incentive to inform him that you were indeed aware of the existence of black-haired, tattooed, chiseled-jaw, sparkly-eyed Jeon Jungkook, all due to the constant snide remarks that followed you in your wake.

You wouldn’t be such a bitch if a guy like Jeon Jungkook put you in your place.

Who the fuck was Jeon Jungkook?

This guy, this weirdo about to fail his fucking Biology exam in front of your face.

Impatiently, you rolled up the sleeves of your gray blazer and grabbed a chair, dragging it up to the table. You snapped the chair down and sat in it, smoothing your skirt. You liked to be neat. Even though university didn’t have a uniform, you liked to keep some sort of uniform for yourself. There was a sense of security in knowing you didn’t have to select an outfit every morning. Today, white dress shirt, gray blazer, pleated black skirt that hit slightly higher than mid-thigh. Every other outfit was some variation of this and, in the winter, you wore thick stockings.

You clicked your heels together under the table sharply.

He flinched at the sound.

Jungkook wasn’t looking at you. He was mumbling at his paper.

“I… I think I studied the wrong chapters…”

You clicked your tongue. Jeez.

His hand was shaking so bad that his pen was practically vibrating. You leaned over the table, grabbing his fist to still it.

“Stop.”

Your bare knees hit his bare knees, mostly because he was wearing black jeans with giant holes in them. Jungkook froze, head snapping up, silver earrings jangling, black hair flying, undercut visible for a second.

“You want to pass this class or what?”

He nodded quickly in response.

“Good. I want to get out of here. Keep your mouth shut. Answer to the first question is A.”

His eyes widened.

“Are you… helping me cheat?” he whispered, terrified.

You cocked your head, letting go of his hand. “You said you studied the wrong chapters. I’m not spending forty-five minutes of my life to watch you panic and then ten minutes more failing you,” you replied lowly, dangerous edge to your voice.

“I… couldn’t… I mean…”

You shoved his knees open with yours, narrowing your eyes as he yelped, pleading look in those brown doe eyes. You pressed your knees on the inside of his thighs, keeping them open.

“Answer to the second question is C.”

When Jungkook didn’t move, you reached over and cupped his chin. Felt his racing heartbeat pounding through his veins, coursing through your fingertips. Stared deep into those eyes, lowering the octave of your voice, keeping his thighs spread for you under the table.

“Listen to me,” you murmured softly. “Okay, Jungkook?”

“O… Okay…”

And he did.

-

There was a rumor.

Nobody liked you. Maybe it was because of your high scores ruining the class test average. Maybe it was the dismissive way you spoke to people, almost demeaning. Most likely it was a combination of the two. Students talked behind your back all the time, spreading rumors. Friends? What friends? You had an average of twenty class credits a semester. You didn’t have time to make friends. And besides, why try to make friends when clearly nobody wanted to be your friend?

And yet.

There was a rumor.

You ignored such things. You didn’t need such distractions.

-

“It would be too suspicious if you got full marks. This score is high enough.”

“O… Okay…”

“Get on the table.”

Jungkook scrambled on the wooden tabletop as you pushed his exam aside. You were still sitting in your chair. Your head tilted, eyebrow lifting at his speedy response to your rather suspicious request.

“You listened.”

He blinked at you. “Uh… yeah?”

Silence.

“Why?” you finally said.

Jungkook gulped. “Be… because you asked,” he mumbled, knees on the table, hands clutching his knees.

“You can just walk out and report me.”

He shook his head quickly, black hair flying everywhere. “I don’t want to.”

Your other eyebrow raised. He chewed on his lip, a flash of pink tongue in his movement.

“Tell me what you want. I’ll do it.”

Well.

You decided to test his conviction.

“Edge of the table. Spread your legs for me.”

Instantly, obediently, Jeon Jungkook surprised you by doing it, putting each leg on either side of you, chunky black sneakers hanging down. Shredded black shirt open, hands behind his ass, towering over you, and yet his eyes were watching you, waiting for more, begging for instruction.

“Hm.”

You raised your chin, seeing his impressively muscular thighs and body displayed for you to take. He was so close you could smell his clean, dreamy scent, like a meadow in summer dusk, surrounded by peeking stars and blinking fireflies. Interesting.

But you didn’t need the distraction.

“That’s it. You can go now,” you said dismissively, about to push your chair back.

His legs closed in, pressing firmly into your upper arms. Your eyes flickered up to him.

Jungkook shook his head very slowly.

“Do what you want.”

You saw his chest rise and fall, his silvery voice deepening, pupils expanding.

“I know you want to do something to me.”

His erection was bulging against the zipper of his black jeans. Your eyes went back to his face. He shivered at your sharp stare. All of this was happening in an otherwise empty lecture hall, with you and Jungkook at the very bottom.

Just you and him.

You placed your hands on his thighs. He jumped a little, but scooted closer to you. You slid your hands up. You undid the button of his jeans, scrutinizing those brown eyes. He raised his hips to help you as you pulled the zipper down.

“You don’t know me,” you finally said, no inflection in your voice.

He didn’t look away. “I don’t care.”

“Hmm.” You smirked. “Bad boy, aren’t you?”

Jungkook shook his head slightly, but didn’t break eye contact as you pulled his pants to his knees and reached for his black boxer briefs. “No. I’m a good guy. I want to give you what you want.” You hooked your fingers over the waistband and nicked his skin with your nails, making him gasp, the pleasure evident in his tone. He did not try to hide it from you. “I want to be good for you.”

“Why is that?”

He hung his head a little.

“Something about… how you make me feel…” he muttered. His gaze finally faltered. You reached up and righted his chin, forcing him to look at you. Saw that Jungkook had a mole under his mouth, perfectly in the center. He had a nice shape to his pink lips. You tapped his cheek, nudging him to elaborate. “You… You’re so pretty… and smart… Everyone looks up to you because you have such good grades…”

You doubted that.

Jungkook probably had no idea that most of the school hated your guts.

You didn’t have classes with Jungkook, but you were sure he knew your name because your name was posted on the Dean’s List of the highest-ranking students of the university every semester. Also, you weren’t hard to miss. Every student moved out of your way when you walked through the halls, whispering behind their hands.

Jungkook brought you back to the present.

“I feel,” he whispered, voice trembling, gaze locking with yours. “I feel like I want to be on my knees for you.”

His skin was warm under your nails.

“Like this is where I belong, in your hands.”

You stood up.

Jungkook started, turning into a tight squeak as you placed your hand on his chest and pushed him down.

“Lift up your shirt with both hands.”

He did was he was told, revealing his toned abs and the lower half of his pecs, biting his lip, clutching onto his tank top, ears turning red as he craned his head to look down at you. You didn’t give him any satisfying response. His tan skin seemed to glow under the overhead lights. You studied his face.

Reached up and began to rub his erection through his underwear.

“A… ah…”

“Gonna make you cum like this.”

He shook his head quickly. “P… Please, no…”

You felt him swell and twitch under your hand. He was pretty big. Thick. Pretty boy with a pretty dick, probably. You rubbed the head with your palm, feeling his pre-cum leaking through the thin fabric. He wasn’t kidding when he said you made him feel some kind of way.

“Why not? Make you cum in your underwear and then you have to go all the way home covered in it. All dirty, just for me.”

His handsome face twisted with sinful pleasure at your suggestion, whimpers in his throat. His cock jerked with need, wanting it.

“O… Okay. Whatever you want.”

So obedient.

“So obedient, Jungkook,” you purred, rubbing faster.

He nodded. “For you. Only for you. Just for you.”

Was it just saying those things because he thought that was what you wanted to hear? Or was that how he actually felt? Surely not the latter, considering he didn’t really know you. You leaned over him, placing your free elbow on the table to stabilize yourself. You hadn’t even kissed him.

“You’re so hard for me,” your drawled, lowering your head, letting your warm breath float down onto his skin. “You want to cum for me, don’t you?”

“Y… yes, please…”

“You want to be my toy?”

You pressed your lips to his bellybutton, feeling the smoothness of his skin, tasting it. He moaned at your kiss, your swift tongue flickering out to that delicious skin, whining when your teeth nipped at the softness. Fuck, he tasted so good that you wanted to mark him. Looked so fucking good that you wanted to mess him up, mar him with temporary imperfections on the perfection that was Jeon Jungkook.

“Yes…”

With breathless, lustful conviction.

You licked up his abs, increasing the intensity and speed of rubbing the engorged head of his cock, the pre-cum already soaked through and creating a slippery surface, turning Jungkook’s pitched whines to deep moans, a melody that filled up the entire lecture hall until was the only thing you could hear, Jungkook’s moans as you bit his skin, his moans as you sucked on his skin, moans as you kissed the hard muscle, cries for more at you left marks, pleading for you, sweet and beautiful, clutching his shirt so tight that his knuckles were white, the black tattoos of his right hand standing out, his cock throbbing in your hand, his hips rising to hump your palm, your name on his lips, over and over and over.

“Gonna… gonna cum…” he panted, sniffing slightly, cheeks flushing pink. “Gonna cum like how you want me to, all over my underwear…”

Your fingertips touched his side, seeing him stiffen and then shudder at your gentle caress.

“Do it,” you murmured. “Show me how good you are at listening, Jungkook.”

He bit his lower lip, jaw clenching, squeezing his eyes shut, tipping his head back into the tabletop, whining your name in his chest, your palm working him, slick and hot and hard, pulsating under your roughness. With a sharp moan, his lower lip popped out of his teeth, dark red and swollen, small mole quivering.

“F-Fuck…!”

You felt it and heard it, the unmistakable jolt and squelch as his orgasm splattered inside his boxer briefs, drenching the fabric, drenching your hand, his embarrassed whines as he realized what he had done but still humping your hand, forcing out every last twitch of dribbling cum, causing you to smear it everywhere, coating the sensitive head and adding to the pleasure, his cheeks flushed red, eyes squeezed shut to savor the pleasure and avoid looking at you.

“Shh…”

You crawled onto the table, still holding his cock through his soiled underwear, squeezing it, free hand slipping under his head and lifting him, his eyes weakly opening, scared and anxious, but all you did was lean down and kiss him, pressing your lips to that pure softness, exhaling his name into his mouth, his scent staining your hand, his cologne filling your nose, your whisper in his throat.

“Time for you to go home.”

-

Jungkook thought you would tell everyone.

You did no such thing.

Instead, you ignored him.

He would see you three times a week and, three times a week, you arrived with the professor and left with the professor. Jungkook tried much harder to attend classes, but you seemed not to care either way. He would come to the front and collect his assignment and find that you had marked it up exactly like everyone else, red marks all over his incorrect answers. You didn’t even look in his direction.

The next exam was coming up quickly.

Part of him considered skipping exam day to have one-on-one time with you again.

“Jungkook.”

He jumped, jerking his head towards the hall, confused. Somehow, he had heard your voice. Or rather, did he imagine it? His teeth sunk into his lip, placing a hand on his forehead, confused. His head was confused. He couldn’t think straight. Why had he done such an embarrassing thing with you? Even you had told him to leave and report you. But Jungkook just couldn’t. Not then and not now. He had asked for it.

He still wanted it.

Nobody knew. Everybody thought he was a cocky, womanizing playboy. And he was, but not because of the sex. It was only because he was bored and that was all he could get. There was power in being on top.

And there was power in letting go.

You were bad for him.

He was a good guy.

You were a bad bitch.

And nobody knew.

A hand slapped down on his shoulder and yanked him around, the loose short sleeves of his yellow tropical shirt flaring out, making his sunglasses rattle on his face. You narrowed your eyes at him. Instant shivers down his spine at your stern gaze.

“Are you deaf?” you snapped. “I’ve been calling your name for the past minute.”

“I… S-Sor–”

You waved a hand dismissively, grabbing his right hand and slapping down a post-it into it.

“Chapters for the exam, including the date and time. Do not miss it this time. I will not let you make it up and fail you on the spot.”

You turned on your heel, letting go of his hand.

His left one shot out and circled around your arm, his rings pressing into your skin.

“Wait.”

You jerked your head towards him, glaring sharply. “Don’t touch me.”

And you yanked your arm out of his grasp, but his legs made the choice for him, following your swift strides, his backpack hanging off one shoulder, clutching the post-it and his last strands of sanity.

“Please, wait.”

“What?” was your curt response, not looking back at him.

“Please do it again,” he gasped breathlessly, unable to stop himself.

“Do what?”

“Have your way with me.”

You stopped walking.

Jungkook walked straight into your back and banged his nose on your head. He winced, stepping back and rubbing it gingerly. He didn’t register you turning around until it was too late and you were right in his face. You raised your chin and eyebrow simultaneously.

“No.”

He blinked rapidly, his tinted sunglasses halfway down the bridge of his nose.

“W… Why? Did you not like it? Was… was I bad?”

You let out an amused scoff.

The side of your lips curved upwards.

He had made you smile, even if only a little bit. Just that small thing was enough to feed his courage.

“I…” Jungkook coughed, clearing his throat before he spoke again, voice still a soft whisper in his embarrassment even though no one was around to eavesdrop. “I can be better. I can do better.”

Silence.

He thought you were going to walk away again.

You reached up and plucked his glasses off his nose. Folded them neatly and tucked them in his tropical shirt pocket. Then your eyes found his again and he knew something was different. He could see you clearly now, his vision no longer clouded by sienna.

Now, Jungkook could no longer stop it.

He could feel it all over him, coursing through his veins, arousal like fire. Something about you and something about him. Jungkook could sense the danger, but he didn’t want to run even though he knew he should. He had heard the rumors surrounding you. They could be true.

And yet.

“I want it,” Jungkook breathed, inviting himself into the danger. “I want you. I want to be your toy.”

Your discerning expression didn’t change.

You reached up and gripped his chin, digging your nails into his soft skin.

He whimpered in his chest, moving closer to you.

“What’s my name?”

His brows furrowed, saying your name hesitantly.

You pulled his chin down so he was eye-level.

“Next time you say my name, I will be choking it out of you.”

-

Everyone thought Jeon Jungkook was the kind of guy to grip your wrist with his left hand and your throat in his right, his lips against your ear and his sweaty chest against your back as you slapped your ass into his crotch and fucked yourself with his rock-hard cock, his smirk in your ear as he provided you with a certain type of encouragement.

“That’s right, you want this dick, don’t you? Show me. Prove to me you want it.”

His fingertips tightening against the sides of your neck, listening to your pathetic cries and moans as you tried to squirm against him, brain running out of oxygen due to lack of blood, running out of thoughts, running out of pleas as Jungkook gripped your wrist, deep snarl against your hair as he roughly finished himself off using your body because that’s all you were, someone to be used by him and nothing more, neck suddenly released with a breathless gasp and shoved face first into the sheets with his right hand splayed on your back, his tattoos and your orgasm crashing down on you, his growls staining the air and a fierce jerk of his hips to spill into your tight hole and leave you moments after, nothing but a discarded toy in his eyes.

You thought.

That was what everyone thought when Jeon Jungkook stood on stage, flipping his dark violet microphone between verses and smirking like a devil, truly in command of every thought and every pair of eyes on him, surrounded by a heavy bass line and deafening drums, guitar solo tearing through the moment to emphasize the next of his lips nearing the mic again, entrancing the crowd with his beautiful lips and talented tongue.

No one knew.

-

You were riding him hard and fast, torn condom wrappers and used condoms littering his bed, back-to-back orgasms, his head pressed into his pillows, your hand around his neck, the other leaving long lines down his chest, scratching him so hard that it dotted red, blooming lines of pain.

“Don’t stop, please don’t stop, f-fuck…”

Jungkook was hoarsely whispering, clutching his sheets, black hair soaked with sweat, raising his chest to your nails, whimpering, punish me, punish me, punish me, and you muttered plainly with a sharp edge, you talk too much, your grip tightening again, pressing onto the sides of his neck, cutting off the blood flow, and Jungkook moaned gratefully, eyelids fluttering, the slap of your hips to his louder and louder, filling up his whole bedroom, rattling his bedframe, fucking him so hard he was slowly sliding up to his headboard.

Your name fell from his lips in pure ecstasy, back arching to shove his whole length fully into you, thick and hard and twitching with need, your slick walls clamping down on him, fitting to him with a hiss. He began to match you, breathless, lightheaded, world hazy, moaning from deep in his chest, I love you, and your reply was only tightening your grip, your hand and your pussy, harder, harder, harder.

“Aren’t you such a good guy?” you scoffed sarcastically, letting up for only a second to let him reply, blood rocketing back into his brain, flooding him with oxygen, and Jungkook sucked in a lungful of air, reeling.

“N-No…” he panted. “You’re the good girl… you’re always s-so… so good to me…”

His eyes locked with yours hazy with lust and love. You almost looked away out of instinct.

“You a-always remember… what I like…” he managed to choke out.

-

You left him when you were done using him.

You pretended he didn’t say those words to you. There was no point in acknowledging the nonsense that he said in the middle of being choked and barely functioning. You tapped your pencil against your textbook.

You caught yourself thinking about him.

Jeon Jungkook.

Your eyes flickered to the clock. Late at night on a Friday. He was probably at a bar. You watched the second hand of your plain silver clock tick, tick away. You never asked to watch him and his band perform even though Jungkook always made it a point to text you the address and the time.

It was obvious Jungkook didn’t want you to be his secret.

He wasn’t really your secret either. You just saw no benefit to letting anyone know there was a connection between you and Jeon Jungkook. After all, you were just using him.

You stopped tapping your pencil.

Stared at the second hand.

Tick.

Heard the voices of the rumors poisoning you, saying the things they said.

She thinks she’s so much better than everyone else because she’s a nerd.

The only reason she has good grades is because she fucked that one professor.

I heard she dated him.

I mean, there’s a reason he left in the middle of the semester, right?

He had a wife!

Snap.

Your eyes flickered down.

The tip of your pencil lead rolled across the page, leaving tiny pinpricks of granite.

There was never any evidence because nothing happened. Nothing happened between you and said psychology professor. He left in the middle of the semester because his wife had a miscarriage and he wanted to be with her. It had nothing to do with you. You had long discussions with him about life and existentialism, hanging out during his office hours.

Sometimes, you felt bad.

Had you kept him from his wife? Would it have not happened if he just skipped his office hours and didn’t spend them talking to you? These were irrational, foolish thoughts. They made you guilty even when there was nothing to be guilty about.

He was a nice guy, mid-thirties. Everyone liked this professor.

They blamed you because they didn’t know.

Only you knew, because he told you with tears in his eyes and thanked you for being his student.

You didn’t tell anyone, because he did not owe you an explanation and you were not going to divulge someone’s personal business that they had shared with you in confidence. You watched your reputation crumble and fall apart, watched friends ostracize you, because you didn’t tell them anything and they didn’t believe you. You watched yourself turn bitter and hateful.

Just tell the truth.

There was no truth to be told.

You put your pencil down.

Closed your eyes.

Remembered Jungkook’s face.

-

Your hands were in his hair, pulling hard. His hot breath was in your face, arms shaking as he held himself up, fucking you into his mattress with whines in his chest, begging you, begging you, begging you.

“P-Please… let me cum, please…”

You liked to watch the sweat clinging to his high cheekbones and neck, jaw glistening with tension, feeling his strong body between your legs, his twitching hardness sliding into you repeatedly in rough, hard smacks, squeezing him every time he was fully sheathed inside you, vibrations coursing through you every time he came down.

“Not until I’m done,” you growled and he whimpered, pleading look in those brown doe eyes, black pupils expanded, unable to cum because a vibrating cock ring was restricting his orgasm, keeping him hard but unable to climax, sending thundering pleasure through him and into you. He watched helplessly as you gripped his hair, hissing sharply as another wave of pleasure overtook you, closing your eyes to savor it, savor his swollen cock twitching inside you as he felt the intense massage of your pussy walls closing around him, throbbing around the head and driving him insane, moaning pathetically because he couldn’t follow suit no matter how desperate he was.

Jungkook didn’t ask if you were done.

He just kept going because you told him he couldn’t cum until you were done.

And you didn’t say you were done.

You stared into those brown orbs, hazy with lust and full of conviction to be good for you.

Desperate to be the best and the only one, not knowing there was no one else because no one else wanted you like the way Jeon Jungkook wanted you.

“Pull out.”

“B-But…”

“You heard me,” you exhaled, throbs of pleasure still trembling through you. Your hands slid down, cupping his chin, nails digging into his sweaty cheeks. “Obey.”

With a pained whine, Jungkook obeyed, pulling out of you, his cock covered in your juices, wearing a condom and the black cock ring. You reached over with one hand to press the button on the remote to turn in off.

“Take it all off. Let me see your cock.”

He reached down and slowly pulled the cock ring off, taking the condom with it, whimpering at the sensitivity, his tone hitting a lovely pitched groan as the silicone squeezed the base of the head. His whole body was shaking as it fell from his hands, the veins on his length standing out, head purple-red and angry, white pre-cum slowly beading at the tip, and his face, looking down at you, waiting for your next move.

Cock waiting to be used.

You tapped your chest.

“Cum on my tits.”

“B-But–”

You cut him off.

“You’re going to cum on my tits and then you’re going to lick it off while I watch.”

-

He listened.

Jungkook straddled your waist with his thighs, muscular and defined, right hand wrapping around his cock, sweat making the tattoos on his forearm and shoulder glow in the low light, smelling like sex and musk, his core tightening as he touched his overstimulated length, using the lube of the condom and his own pre-cum to add to the pleasure as he began to stroke himself, moaning as you lifted your hands and cupped your breasts, pushing them together, his eyes on the curve of your cleavage and points of your hard nipples sticking out, and then your face, an indifferent look with a cocked eyebrow, taunting him, unimpressed by his timid grip on his cock, so he squeezed harder, tighter, embarrassing cries falling from his mouth, living for the smirk that slowly began to form on your lips.

It empowered him somehow, that smirk, the little inkling of satisfaction that Jungkook wanted, needed, craved, knowing he was doing well, being good, furiously pumping his aching cock over your pressed-together tits and he couldn’t last, couldn’t help it, too overstimulated and too turned on, too in love with this to prevent himself from tipping over with a hot gasp, spilling streams of sticky white lines over your breasts, spreading them everywhere, making a huge mess because he wanted a huge mess to clean up, shoving the head into your cleavage and shuddering at the sensation of warmth to his scorching heat, able to feel the pulse of the engorged tip dripping out what was left, shivers up and down his spine, the words falling from his mouth that he never stopped saying even though you never acknowledged them.

“I... l-love you…”

He stayed like that for nearly a full minute, but you didn’t tell him to get off.

His eyes were closed, savoring the feeling.

Slowly, Jungkook gingerly removed himself, lowering his body over yours, tongue sliding out, touching your skin covered in his cum, his taste, mine, no one else’s, him on you, lapping it up, salty and bitter and yet he loved it, loved that you told him to do it, loved that you let him paint your skin with his orgasm and now his saliva. He didn’t care that you never said anything to his I love you, didn’t care that you seemed to pretend he never said it, because he would continue saying it when he was with you, hopeless as it was.

It was the small things that kept him going, sucking his own cum off your nipple and wrapping his lips around it, hearing your soft sigh of pleasure, feeling the tap on his thigh that instructed him to scoot up, the small thing of your hand closing in on his spent cock, sending sparks of pain but also pleasure, moaning into your skin as you massaged his balls with your fingers, knowing that he could take more pressure and roughness because he had just came, the small thing of your thumb rubbing the sensitive slit, his face pressing into your breasts, smearing his cheek with his cum and saliva, sliding across your slick skin because of the intensity of the high it gave him, the pleasure and the pain, his right arm coming up to wrap around you, tattoos cradling your torso.

“I love you…” he whispered to your racing heart under his ear, lost in the rhythm of your heartbeat and the firmness of your touch. Jungkook did not care if you hated him saying it.

He would continue saying it as long as he was with you.

-

“What are you doing?”

“Nothing…?”

“Hmm.”

He placed his hand over the bottom of his phone and smiled at the cute girl that was talking to him at the bar.

“Sorry. I have to take this call. It’s important to me.”

He didn’t hear her response, because he backed away, bowing lightly, pressing his phone back to his ear.

“Ah, never mind, Jungkook.”

“No, no. What is it? Tell me.”

“You’re at a noisy place. It’s Saturday night.”

Jungkook pushed through the people, mumbling his apologies and straining to hear your voice over the thundering bass. “I finished. Well, we finished. We’re only drinking. I can leave at any time. I’ll just text the guys to bring my equipment back for me. Where are you?”

“Forget it.”

He opened the door of the club as the dial tone rang in his ear.

Looked up.

Your hand dropped to your side. You were still in your white dress shirt and navy skirt, dressed exactly like you were when at school minus the blazer. Jungkook’s eyes widened. He was in a torn-up long-sleeve shirt with the right sleeve removed, showing off his tattoos. His black hair was wild and half-wet, and he was wearing tight leather pants.

You clicked your tongue.

“I said forget it,” you repeated hollowly.

You sighed and turned around, skirt swishing in your wake.

“Wait, I’ll come with you–”

“Go back to where you belong, Jungkook.”

His hand closed around your forearm, holding tight.

“I belong with you.”

You stopped walking, silent.

“What is it? Tell me.”

You scowled. “It’s dumb.”

“So am I, remember?” he chuckled, his hand slipping down, squeezing yours. “I’m not very good at school.”

You didn’t say anything for a moment. Cars and people brushed past, but Jungkook was focused onto on your stillness, watching your eyes seemed to be thinking about many things. You hadn’t pulled your hand out of his yet. By now, Jungkook knew that if you didn’t want something, you wouldn’t be shy about telling him right away.

You started walking again. Jungkook was still holding your hand.

“It was just a moment of weakness,” you mumbled under your breath.

“A guy…?”

You didn’t answer.

Jungkook squeezed your hand. “It’s okay,” he murmured tightly. “I understand.”

He did not. He wanted to cry.

Your eyes shot to him, pinning him in place. “You don’t understand, Jeon Jungkook. You understand nothing.” You pulled your hand out of his and Jungkook let go, trying to hold his pain, trying not to breathe because he was preparing himself for the inevitable, the moment you were going to break his heart and, if it was right here and right now, then so be it, because he had said how he felt repeatedly and there was nothing more he could do than that.

He loved you so, so bad.

Jungkook knew he shouldn’t, that it was madness, but he did anyway.

But you surprised him.

Your sharp gaze softened.

“You know what they say about me. You have to know,” you exhaled, shaking your head. “You must know the rumors.”

Good girl gone bad.

Jungkook frowned. “About you and the professor?”

He watched your jaw clench.

“Does it matter?” he asked.

Your eyes shifted, not quite looking at him.

“Whether something did or didn’t happen, what does that have to do with me?”

And now you looked at him, guarded, not letting him know your thoughts.

“You…” He swallowed, trying to press the lump down in his throat. “You’re just using me, right? It doesn’t… doesn’t really matter, because in the end I don’t matter to you anyway… right?”

He did not want to cry and yet he did, because he knew he loved you. It was the small things, the way you never let up on him even in class, the way you picked days that were never the weekend and never before exams, the way you would brush your fingertips on his knuckles before leaving when you thought he was asleep, the way on the last time, the last time you were together, that you pressed your lips to his forehead when you thought he was asleep, running your fingers through his hair.

Jungkook was standing outside this bar and there were people he knew walking past, seeing you and him, but he kept his eyes on you, because the only one that mattered was you.

The one he belonged to was you.

He had decided that when he climbed onto the table that day.

He stuck his hands in his pockets and let out a heavy breath. “If people say things about you, then they say things about you. Whether it’s the truth or not doesn’t change the fact I love you. It doesn’t make me love you less,” Jungkook said, speaking at his usual volume, because there was no reason to whisper the truth. “Even if it’s pointless and crazy, I want to be with you until the day you don’t want to be with me.”

His smiled and blinked back tears.

“Even if that day is today, I will never regret it.”

In this cruel summer, you could have ruined his reputation. You could have told everyone the kind of person he really was and you didn’t. You could have spread embarrassing stories of the things you made him do and you didn’t.

Even if he didn’t matter to you, Jungkook was confident that you weren’t a malicious person.

You rubbed your forehead. “The rumors will come to you.”

Jungkook laughed. “So what? I heard a rumor that I removed two ribs so I could suck my own dick. I admit, I considered doing it after hearing that.”

You scowled, but Jungkook only smiled in return. He could see the tension falling from your face with his comment. You clicked your tongue and tilted your head, as if to say, can’t be helped.

“There’s no other guy,” you muttered. “There’s just you and you’re dumb.”

Jungkook blinked rapidly, confused.

“You say it over and over and make me think about it all the time.” You sighed heavily, running a hand through your hair. “I’m not a good girl. People pushed me away and I stayed there instead of trying to repair the burned bridges. I don’t even think I want to repair them. Who knows what will happen next? I don’t think it would be a good idea to put you through that shit.”

You sucked on the inside of your cheek, looking at him apologetically.

“You’re not the bad boy everyone says you are. You’re a good guy. You should find a good girl.”

Is that what you think? Jungkook chuckled, taking out his hand and rubbing his nose thoughtfully.

“I don’t want a good girl.”

He stepped toward you, lowering his hand and his head so that he was eye level with you.

“I love a bad bitch who can push me around and makes me their toy.”

He tilted his head, small curve on those beautiful lips, tiny mole underneath appearing with every smile.

“Which can only be you, you know.”

Jungkook didn’t try to kiss you. He only wanted to look into your eyes so you knew his conviction.

“I love you.”

You raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I’ve heard you say it.”

He nodded. “And I’m going to keep saying it until the day you leave me.”

Silence.

Ah.

Your eyebrow lowered and you gave him an indifferent look.

“Hm. I wonder when that will be, Jungkook.”

You leaned in, but before you kissed him, he heard the whisper against his lips, felt the shape of yours as they brushed against his, words he prepared himself to never hear from you, words that he thought you would never say, and that was fine with him, because you showed it, and that was enough.

He thought.

“I love you.”

And then your lips on his and his tears fell onto your cheeks because Jungkook wanted to cry all this time and he could not stop now, knowing that he was so, so in love with you and you finally, finally said it back to him.

--

masterpost

[iwillwakeherinthemorning]

All of the . . . And then the . . . I 👏 CANNOT 👏 EVEN 👏 These two might actually be my new favorite. Fuck Ashlee! And anyone else who gave that beautiful man the idea that he was unworthy of a lustful gaze. And cuddles. And all the love that he deserves. I actually want to slap a fictional character. And the baby!!! Both of them seeing each other with a baby! And the fun banter between Ellie and her family! And score for the honest communication at the end! I’m honestly so in love with everything about this chapter. A vulnerable Chris is such a refreshing dichotomy to read when he’s portrayed, in real life and on paper, as this big strong tough guy. And then to read that next to a strong and also vulnerable partner is so beautiful. Thank you ladies!!! ❤️

Playing With Fire

Chapter 8

Summary: After a change of heart nearly ten years into her career as a pediatric intensive care unit nurse, Ellie Maxwell has moved back home and returned to her old job at the local bakery, where the regulars are the firefighters from down the street. When sparks begin to fly between Ellie and the guarded, closed-off Chris, will anything come of it?

Pairing: Firefighter!Chris Evans X OFC Elizabeth “Ellie” Maxwell

Word Count: 10,178

By: @k-evans-writes and @ourfinest-hour

Warnings: 18+.

Previous | Main Masterlist | Playing With Fire Masterlist

A knock echoed on the door of the bakery, Ellie lifting her head and smiling widely when she saw the familiar face through the pane of glass in the door. Hurrying over, she unlocked the door, letting Chris in from the cold before closing it back behind him. She still had the broom in her hand when Chris swiftly pulled her against his frame and kissed her so deeply she was almost out of breath when he parted from her lips. 

She opened her eyes to see his own staring at her, Ellie raising her eyebrows as she told him, “Well hi to you too.”

“Sorry, it’s just been way too long since I’ve been able to do that,” Chris admitted with a shake of his head, and Ellie had to agree. They’d had a quick breakfast date the previous Sunday with plans to get together while Hazel was in school on Tuesday and Wednesday, but the snow storm ruined those plans as Chris spent every minute of Tuesday and Wednesday running around with Hazel at home. 

But while some things didn’t go to plan, the best part of her week was when Chris surprised her on Monday by bringing Hazel by the bakery unexpectedly. Ellie only expected to meet Hazel after several weeks - or even months - of them dating, and while Chris only introduced her as a “friend” to Hazel, it still meant the world to Ellie, and she knew it meant the same to Chris by seeing the look in his eyes the entire time. 

“I certainly didn’t mind,” she laughed, locking the door again before she turned and reached for her AirPods, putting them back in the case before she walked towards the broom and dustpan. “I’m almost done cleaning up and then we can go.” 

But Chris - who still had damp hair sticking to the nape of his neck from his shower - rushed over and told her, “Here, I’ll sweep.” 

She stepped aside, letting him sweep as she finished changing the last of the trash bags from the trash cans around the bakery. “How was your shift today?” She asked, turning and glancing over to him. He was dressed in a sweater and jeans with sneakers on, something she knew he didn’t keep at the firehouse. He tended to get off work on Saturdays before she did, which clearly had left him time to run home and change - and drop Dodger off - before he came here.

His back was to her as he shrugged, Ellie watching as the muscles beneath his sweater shifted with the movement. “A little rough… we had a fire in that old abandoned building over on the edge of town and that one was tough to get out but other than that, it’s been pretty uneventful,” he told her, then turned and shot her a wry smile as he made his way back over to her and admitted, “Pretty glad to be here with you now though.” 

“I am too, baby,” she whispered, leaning up to peck his cheek before she grabbed the dustpan, dumping the crumbs and trash into the open trash bag. Then, she tied the bag off, turning to double-check the bathroom was clean and ready for the Sunday crowds.

“So any thoughts on what you’d like to do tonight?” Chris called as he leaned his hip against the counter, his voice carrying down the short hallway into the open door of the kitchen where Ellie was putting on her coat so that she could take the trash to the dumpster. “I’m not picking up Hazel until tomorrow morning because Ashlee took her to New York today to go to an aquarium so they won’t be back until late. So I have time for whatever you want to do.” 

“I’m mostly just hungry,” she laughed and she could hear Chris’ own laughter and she opened the door, crossing the few short feet to the dumpster before she threw the trash in and came back inside. 

Chris’ tall slender frame appeared in the open doorway while Ellie was washing her hands for the last time, a small sideways grin on his face. “You know I can always eat,” he whispered, before he suddenly turned his head and narrowed his eyes, then they widened as he turned back and told her quickly, “Hey Ellie, your phone is ringing.” 

“Sorry, I’m just going to take this really quick,” she replied, brushing past him and reaching for her phone from where she left it on the counter. She smiled at the name that was showing, putting the phone up to her ear as she said, “Hi Mom, how are you?” 

Her mom’s warm voice filled Ellie’s ear as Diana asked, “I’m good, how are you? Are you still at work?” 

“Yeah, just finishing closing up,” Ellie replied, turning around and smiling as Chris gave her a small grin before he looked away, busying himself with his phone.

“Oh perfect! Amanda is taking Nathan to a little swim class tomorrow afternoon so we were going to do family dinner tonight. Dad’s got the brisket almost finished and I made your favorite cornbread muffins and macaroni and cheese.” 

“That sounds so good but I can’t make it tonight. Chris just got here and we were going to go out,” she explained, her eyes moving to glance out the windows before they moved back to Chris’ frame.

“You could bring him over if you want,” Diana said quietly, trailing off a bit before - at Ellie’s silence - she excitedly added, “You know that we all want to meet him!” 

“I don’t know Mom,” Ellie whispered, turning to face away from Chris as she admitted to her mom, knowing about Chris’ worries and past which had led them to take things slow, “I think it might be too early.” 

Without judgement or hesitation, her beloved mother rolled with the punches and replied, “Okay, well I’ll make sure to save you some leftovers.” 

“Thanks Mom, I’ll come over tomorrow, okay? I love you,” Ellie told her before they hung up, Ellie turning back around and seeing Chris raising an eyebrow at her from where he was standing next to the oversized windows near the door and the hall to the bathroom and kitchen. 

“Everything okay?” He asked with a casual and even tone, his face unchanging as he looked at her. 

“Yeah, it was just my mom. She was just calling to invite me over for dinner,” she shook her head and explained, “We normally all have dinner together on Sunday evening but they’re doing it tonight.” 

He shrugged, his expression shifting as he told her, “You can go if you want, I don’t mind.” 

“Well they invited you too but I told them we have plans,” Ellie added with a slightly tense grin, her face flushing.

“I don’t know that we really do,” he admitted with a chuckle, then reassured her, “We can go if you want to, Ellie.”

“Chris, I really don’t want to have to meet my whole family tonight. I know that’s a big step.” 

“I know, but I’d like to,” he insisted, moving from where he was standing next to the door to stand in front of Ellie behind the counter, facing her. 

“...Are you sure?” 

“Well I mean, I overheard there was brisket so that kind of sold me,” he chuckled, his face scrunching up. 

Knowing that this was his way of saying he was ready to take another step with her, Ellie wrapped her arms around his firm waist, looking up into his eyes for a long moment before she pressed a soft kiss to his lips, saying so many things without a word. Once they parted, Ellie grabbed her purse and Chris made sure he had his keys before they left the cozy bakery, Chris suggesting that she just ride with him on the way out to the tree farm where she directed him along a small dirt road alongside the tree farm until they reached the quaint farmhouse sitting in back that made Ellie feel warm from the inside out everytime she laid eyes on it. 

She couldn’t help but feel a little bit nervous, unsure how all of this would go. It still was all so new with Ellie getting to know Chris, not to mention the fact she met Hazel this week, but their discussion about taking things slow and not rushing anything from last week was still in the back of her mind. Chris still had walls up - not only around her, but around everyone who wasn’t Hazel or his brother - and although they’d made progress since then, she was worried that this could be too much too quickly.

If there was one thing that Ellie didn’t want, it was to scare him away. There was something different between them, something she hadn’t fully felt before and she didn’t want to lose that or give up on the possibilities of what could be. It wasn’t a secret to her that her family was a little unsure about Chris, with good reason, because of how it all had started with him hiding his past and Hazel, and she felt apprehension in her gut about how they could perceive him, or honestly how Chris would perceive them and possibly cause his walls to go right back up. 

But at the end of the day, she knew that she didn’t have control over it and had to let it be what it was, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t feel that knot inside her stomach when she came walking in the front door with Chris at her side. The lively conversation that was happening in the home immediately stopped when they stepped inside, all eyes landing on Chris before her mother happily announced, “You came!” 

“You know you’ll always get me when you mention your macaroni and cheese,” Ellie laughed, reaching to pull her coat off and hang it on the hook, then placed her hand on Chris’ thick bicep and introduced him, “But I want everyone to meet Chris and Chris, this is my family.” 

“It was really nice of you to include me tonight,” Chris told them with a shy smile on his face, the nervous look in his eyes that Ellie recognized from their first interactions together.

“We’re so glad you were able to come!” Diana smiled, moving through the cramped kitchen past the dining table from Ellie’s childhood to hug Chris tightly.

“Chris I know I’ve told you before but now that you have a face to the name, this is my mother Diana and that’s my dad, Brett,” Ellie told him, her voice soft as she pointed to her father. “Then this is my brother Daniel, his wife Amanda and this is my adorable baby nephew Nathan.” 

Chris smiled at them, the nervous look staying in the back of his eyes as he said, “It’s really nice to meet you all.” 

Ellie’s older brother had a smirk on his face as he reached for his beer, telling Chris, “We’re glad to meet you too, Ellie won’t shut up about you.” 

“Daniel!” Ellie quickly interjected, her cheeks flushing as Chris laughed, his nose scrunching with amusement. 

Brett quietly grabbed a beer from the fridge and offered it to Chris and he and Ellie moved into the kitchen more. Ellie was preoccupied with shooting daggers at her older brother, who was raising his hands innocently and saying, “What? It’s true.” 

“Ignore Daniel, he’s an idiot,” Ellie told Chris, shaking her head. “But my dad will be happy someone else is here to appreciate his brisket. It’s the one thing he cooks really well so he’s pretty proud of it.” 

“Hey, I made that turkey one time!” 

“Yeah and we practically had to use a chainsaw to cut through it because it was so tough,” Diana remembered, patting Brett’s shoulder as she moved past him to get another bottle of wine open, Ellie nodding when her mother silently asked her if she wanted any.

Amanda, who was holding baby Nathan in her lap, said with a smirk, “That was like four years ago and I still don’t think my stomach has fully digested it.” 

“Okay I think everyone needs to keep their sarcastic comments to themselves for once and get a seat at the table,” Brett cut them off, the laughter silencing as everyone moved to the table, where Ellie was helping Daniel add two extra places for herself and Chris.

They all sat down, Ellie watching fondly as Amanda and Daniel got Nathan situated in his high chair at one end of the table, just as Diana began passing around food for everyone.

“Chris, we’re so excited you could join us for dinner and get a chance to meet you,” Diana told him, glancing at him as she passed Ellie the salad. “Ellie said you’ve been here before.” 

He nodded from next to Ellie, and Ellie couldn’t help but squeeze his hand underneath the table comfortingly as she served herself some salad. She wanted to reassure him that they wouldn’t judge him, wouldn’t think he was anything beyond what he showed them to be, but she knew his mind was already beyond that. His voice wavered a bit in the beginning as he replied, “Yeah, my family always comes to your tree farm every year to get our Christmas tree. In fact, we were here just a few weeks ago getting our tree. We always love the ones we get from your farm.” 

Her father nodded as well from the head of the table, where he was sitting across from his grandson. “Well I’m certainly glad to hear that,” the man smiled, but then smirked and added, “And if you’re just lying to me to make a good impression, I accept that too.” 

“Chris, I know your sister Carly,” Amanda began to speak, turning her attention away from where Nathan was munching on some mac and cheese to look at Chris. “I’m the second grade teacher at Lakewood so I’ve met her a few times at staff meetings.” 

“Oh really? My sister loves that school and so do I,” he smiled, and it was the first genuine expression she’d seen on his face since they arrived, but the hint of tension and nerves remained.  “My daughter goes to preschool at Lakewood.” 

“How does your daughter like it?” 

“Oh she loves it,” he said easily before he shrugged, explaining,  “Hazel doesn’t have any siblings so she loves being around other kids. She told me the other day that the only bad part about preschool is that she can’t bring our dog, Dodger, to school with her.” 

Brett huffed out a laugh, shaking his head and pointing a finger at Ellie as he told Chris, “That sounds just like Ellie when she was a kid.” 

Ellie’s brother and parents began trading stories from Ellie’s childhood, of her misadventures at school, home, and around the farm. Chris laughed louder at each and every story, shaking his head as he admitted that they did sound just like Hazel - to everyone’s amusement. And while he often reverted back into himself as the conversation shifted to every new topic, Ellie enjoyed getting to see the way he navigated this evening. 

Although Ellie could tell how nervous Chris was from seeing the look in his eyes and his stiff body language throughout the early evening. She didn’t blame him for feeling that way with this dinner being sprung on him so suddenly, but it made her happy to see the tension leaving his shoulders and his expressions relaxing as the night went on. This wasn’t the first time Ellie had brought a boyfriend home, sitting in this exact same position but she hadn’t ever felt this level of comfort and felt that something was so right, especially this early on. Ellie already could tell that this was going to last. 

Tucking a piece of her wavy blonde hair behind her ear, she turned to look at Chris as he was sitting there happily listening to a story her father was telling and something struck her for the first time. She realized for the first time since meeting him that the handsome firefighter that sat next to her - who was a year and a half younger than her - didn’t seem older than her. Normally Chris carried so much on his shoulders from being a single parent to then going into a high stress job. He had been through so much in his twenty-eight years of life, and those experiences had only made him lean into growth and persevering through them all. 

But in this moment, he seemed like a normal twenty-eight year old, sitting with an arm resting on the top of Ellie’s chair, the other slapping against his chest as he wildly laughed at the ending of her father’s story. The weight of responsibility was gone from his face, replaced with nothing but contentment and it made Ellie want nothing more than to bring some of that peace to his life, lifting some of that heavy weight off his shoulders. The only thought that flashed through Ellie’s brain was just how much she loved this… just how much she was starting to love him. She knew she was falling and boy was she falling fast, but Ellie didn’t want to stop it because she wasn’t afraid of falling in deep for him. 

“Okay, I think it’s time for some cake,” Diana sighed as she pushed herself up, heading into the kitchen, where she grabbed the cake cutter from a drawer, just as Daniel excused himself to use the bathroom. 

Amanda sat up in her chair from where she was holding a babbling Nathan. “Oh, I brought some fresh strawberries too! I’ll go get them from the car,” she offered, then met Chris’ eyes and asked, “Chris, would you mind holding Nate while I go out?” 

“I’d love to,” Chris smiled, Ellie’s heart stopping as he reached for the baby, holding him in his thick arms. The dark-haired boy gave Chris a gummy smile as Chris said, “C’mere big guy.” 

Ellie couldn’t help but stare at the two until her mother interrupted her thoughts, asking, “Hey Ellie, can you come help me get those plates down?” 

“Yeah, I’m coming,” Ellie replied, standing up and moving through the archway into the kitchen. Once the plates were retrieved, she stood next to her mom and quietly asked,  “Okay, so what do you think of him?” 

“Oh honey, that boy is a keeper,” Diana told her in a hushed tone, looking at Ellie with a happy look on her face. 

“I think so too,” Ellie confessed to her as a large grin spread across her face. “I knew you’d love him once you met him.” 

“Honestly I wasn’t really sure what to expect with him,” Diana admitted, shaking her head. “With Chris not having told you the truth and knowing some of the things about his past I just… wasn’t quite sure what he’d be like but he’s a good one.” 

Ellie nodded, knowing they all had shared the same suspicions. She kept having the same thoughts about Chris on a loop in her mind and she had to vocalize at least some of it, telling her, “I’m really crazy about him, mom.” 

“I can tell he feels the same way about you.” 

“Do you think so?” Ellie asked quietly, hope filling her heart as it stopped beating. “I know Chris likes me but sometimes he’s just so hard to read. He’s more closed off with his feelings sometimes… I’m sure because of what he went through with his ex, but sometimes it just makes me unable to know what he’s really thinking.” 

“Ellie, seeing the way he was looking at you could have made me cry. If you saw the look on his face when he was staring at you while you were talking, you’d know that you have nothing to worry about with that one,” Diana reassured her, grasping her daughter’s arm before they heard Chris laughing and then saw him playing with Nate at the table.

And when Ellie walked back out to the dining room with plates of cake in her hands, she saw Chris look up from where he was sitting, playing with the happy baby and when she saw the look in his blue eyes, she knew exactly what her mother was talking about. Seeing the softness in his eyes and that little hint of a smile on his face made her know without a doubt that all of the things she was feeling were reciprocated just as much. 

Feeling nothing but overwhelming emotion for him, Ellie couldn’t help but lean down to press a soft quick kiss to his lips before taking the seat next to him again with nothing but happiness in her heart. Although he didn’t want to say it in front of everyone as they came back to the table, each grabbing their piece of cake while Amanda dished up the fresh strawberries, Chris felt that same happiness. It wasn’t really a secret that he didn’t have much of a social life. He really only spent time with his family, Hazel, and his co-workers, mainly Mark, during the week. He was too busy for a whole lot else and with his guarded nature, opening up wasn’t something that came easily to him, but with Ellie, he wanted to try. 

The feeling stayed with them both as they left Ellie’s parents and decided to head back to Chris’ house and see Dodger before it got too late. As he drove them across town and pulled into the short driveway, Ellie took in the dark home, unable to make out most of the details, but knowing it perfectly suited both him and Hazel. It could - in her mind - only be described as being his home, down to the Patriots camping chairs in the garage and the overwhelming amount of outside toys stored for Hazel. 

After greeting Dodger, the dog happy to see both Chris and Ellie, Chris let Dodger outside into the fenced yard while he dumped more water in the dog’s bowl. Ellie toed off her sneakers and joined him in the kitchen as Chris sat down ungracefully at the kitchen barstool, pulling out his phone while she grabbed herself a water. 

“Elles, come look at this video that Ashlee sent me of Hazel at the aquarium,” Chris laughed, waiting until Ellie sat down next to him and huddled next to her, slouched over the counter as they both stared at his phone. “Look at her face when that shark swims by!” 

She watched the video showing Hazel’s face from the side as she  - Chris’ profile - lit up when the shadow of a shark crossed the tiny face, Ellie laughing along with Chris and saying, “She’s so excited! God, could Hazel be any cuter?” 

“That little curly top melts my heart,” Chris said fondly, shaking his head and texting back a reply before he locked his phone, sliding it away from him on the counter. 

“It looks like she had a pretty good day today,” Ellie whispered to him as she faced him, her hand moving through the hair at the back of his head. 

He looked at her with that sideways grin that made her heart skip several beats, his hand moving to rest on her thigh as he told her with a shrug, “So did her dad.” 

“Other than the fact you had to go meet my entire family at the drop of a hat,” Ellie laughed, her thigh twitching as he gently squeezed it. 

But Chris shook his head, his smile falling as he told her, “I actually had a really good time. Your family is really wonderful,” then he paused, a smirk spreading across his lips as he told her, “Besides, seeing you hold your baby nephew was pretty damn cute. You looked really good with that baby.” 

Ellie let out a loud laugh, shaking her head and telling him with an eyebrow raised, “Well I wasn’t a pediatric nurse for nothing.” 

They laughed together, sitting contently together until his phone buzzed again with another picture of Hazel - this time of her asleep in her car seat - and laughed some more at the expression on the little girl’s face, at how exhausted she must have been after her big day with Ashlee. 

He was looking at his phone with that smile again before he looked at her again, the expression remaining as his eyes flicked over her face. And she knew. “Chris… I wanted to tell you something,” Ellie began quietly, her hand dropping to his shoulder. 

“What is it?” He asked, a single brow raised.

“I just want you to know that I love you, baby,” she said slowly, pausing nervously before she rushed to continue, “I know it’s really soon and that you've been through a lot in the past and you don’t need to say it back, but I just want you to know.” 

He hesitated, stammering a little as he told her, “Ellie… I…” 

“Don’t say anything,” she interrupted, reassuring him, “You don’t need to say a word, I just wanted you to know that I love you.” 

Hearing those words and letting them sink in made Chris feel like every wall he had around him came down at this moment. There was nothing but warmth inside him from hearing those words directed at him. At first he felt like it had been so long since he heard that but he realized that honestly it was the first time anyone, outside of his family, had said those words to him and actually meant it. Ellie spoke those words with nothing but truth and emotion, wanting nothing in return and that touched him so deeply that he could feel tears stinging at his eyes. 

All he could do was wrap his thick arms around her, pulling Ellie into him while he nuzzled his face in her neck, just needing to feel her close right now. He felt so undeserving, so inadequate to receive such pure love from Ellie, but he was receiving it nonetheless and nothing could have felt better. The anxiety in his brain wanted to convince him that her words weren’t true. That somehow there was something going on, some ulterior motive that would cause her words to be untrue, or that she’d change her mind later on, but he knew that just wasn’t the case. He could hardly remember the times that he and Ashlee had ever said those three words to each other, being so few and far between, especially after they were married, but it had never felt like this. Hearing those words from her never felt like it did right now and all the emotions it caused in him made Chris know without a doubt that they were true and honest. 

Chris lifted his head up just enough so that he could bring his lips to hers, kissing her with a wordless promise that although he wasn’t quite ready to take that step of saying that, he was feeling it inside and wanted to be able to communicate it back to her. He wanted Ellie to know just how much he adored her and wanted her in every sense of the word. Even the ones he couldn’t quite say yet. 

Their lips met over and over again, Chris’ hands slipping underneath her black shirt and far enough up her back for Ellie to pull away from his lips, “Chris… are you sure?” 

“I’m sure,” he whispered without an ounce of hesitation or anxiety, moving to kiss her again.

But Ellie’s lips pulled back from his again, her eyes staring at him with furrowed brows. “We can wait, I don’t mind,” she insisted, swallowing nervously and continuing, “I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything just because I said that I love you.” 

Chris shook his head, trying to assure her that there were entirely no worries or fears that he had. He wanted her, and he knew that he wanted to do this. “I promise you I don’t feel that way.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Ellie… I just want you,” he whispered to her, a small grin on his face.

And if Ellie wasn’t already putty in his hands, she was completely melted from those words and the tender look on that handsome bearded face. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing herself completely against him while she kissed him with so much passion that Chris felt like he was seeing stars. They stayed wrapped up in each other’s arms, kissing passionately and building up the desire that was already burning between them. 

When neither could breathe properly, they pulled back, both bleary eyed and sloppily kissing at whatever part of each other's faces that they could reach. Finally Chris pulled back, his hands slipping out from under her shirt as he looked into her soft eyes, telling her, “I’ll be right back.” 

She watched as he pushed himself off the couch, going over to open the door to the backyard and called out for Dodger before the adorable pooch came trotting over to come back inside. Chris leaned down, kissing his head before leading him to the kitchen where he pulled out the bag of dog food, filling up Dodger’s bowl before grabbing him a bone to keep the happy dog occupied. When he walked back over to the couch, he saw Ellie relaxed against the couch, a happy contented smile on her face. 

At first, Ellie wasn’t completely sure what the chain of events would be, knowing that this next step wasn’t easy for Chris. He had expressed needing more time and Ellie wasn’t about to push him. She didn’t want to be the one to advance things, giving Chris an easy out incase he changed his mind, but when he leaned down and scooped her up effortlessly in his thick arms, it clued her in that she wasn’t the only one who was just as eager for this moment. 

Ellie threw her arms around his neck, clinging onto him as he carried her up the stairs and down the short hallway. She started kissing along his neck, her whole body feeling flushed at just how incredibly strong he was, and that mixed with his gentle demeanor was enough to light her on fire. 

He placed her down gently on the dark wooden floor, his hands moving to her hips just as she spun them, Chris’ back pressed to the white door as her hands squeezed his shoulders before she clung to him, kissing him with a fervor. Their hands were everywhere, grabbing and rubbing along whatever they could find, Chris feeling so weak at the way her body was flush against his. 

Ellie’s hands were squeezing at his broad shoulders while his lips attacked her neck, sucking along that soft skin that he couldn't wait to feel more of. Chris’ hands were lingering at her hips, unsure about the next move he should make, his fingers moving to hover around the button on her jeans before finally going for it and popping open the button. 

She moaned softly when he hit a particularly sensitive spot on her neck, making his pants feel a little tighter at that sound. His hands continued pulling at the zipper before he pushed the denim off of her hips, Ellie wiggling her way out of them as Chris’ hands trailed up her soft skin, feeling her thighs underneath his fingertips. She pulled back slightly from his warm body as his hands kept trailing upwards, her black sweater gathering as he followed the curve of her sides and took the black shirt up and over her head, adding it to the pile before Ellie threw her arms back around his neck to press herself completely against him, so desperate to feel him. 

Their lips met for about the thousandth time, kissing fervently as Chris started walking them backwards toward his large bed until Ellie’s legs hit the mattress. He gently pushed her backwards, letting her lay on the bed, her blonde hair splayed out on his pillow as she caught her breath. Chris climbed on the bed next to her, his lips immediately finding hers while his big hand rubbed along the curve of her side, wanting to commit the feeling of her soft skin to memory. He pushed away the thoughts that threatened to take over his mind, the fears and insecurities, and instead forced himself to focus on this - on Ellie, who was here, in his bed. She had already proved all of his fears wrong over these past three weeks, and while he was beginning to shift his views thanks to her, he was still fucking terrified to do this, even if he wanted to. And he wanted to.

“I love you Chris,” her soft voice breathed out in between their lips meeting over and over again. 

And those simple, honest words seemed to pull every doubt about himself from his mind for a moment. It had been so long since he had felt loved like this… actually he hadn’t ever really felt it from a partner before if he was being totally honest. But here he was, only a few weeks into this with Ellie and he was already in so insanely deep for her and that both terrified and electrified him. 

Needing to feel her, and wanting to - no needing to -  communicate all of the emotions inside him, Chris let his hand wander up to gently rub across her soft orange bralette, being able to feel her hardening nipples underneath the thin fabric. She sighed against his lips, letting Chris know how much she liked it but when his hand slid down farther and farther, he could feel a sudden exhale of breath from her that gave away her anticipation. 

Ellie’s heart was pounding when Chris’ warm hand slipped between her legs, cupping her over her scalloped edge floral cream panties. She knew he had to have felt how soaked she was for him already, knowing the fabric was more than just damp at this point and feeling his touch so close and yet not enough had her whimpering against his lips. 

He started sucking along her bottom lip as his hand gently caressed her over her floral panties, only getting Ellie more worked up than she already was. She didn’t feel like it was a secret that she wanted Chris in every single way. She was completely head over heels for him and getting to be laying in his bed felt even better than she dreamed it would have. Ellie breathed in his musky cologne, loving the way it made her feel completely surrounded by him while he let go of her bottom lip, coming back to kiss her deeply while a single finger trailed along her panty covered slit, causing a shiver to run down her spine. She needed him closer, her hips rolling up into his hand and giving him the hint as he kissed her senseless. 

“C-Chris, please babe,” she practically whimpered, too far gone already to hear the hitch in his breath at the begging. 

He was just as eager to feel her, bringing his hand up so he could slip it underneath her panties, his index finger bringing her a little bit of relief when it pushed between her folds. Chris felt his own arousal growing at the feeling of just how wet she was for it, helping to boost his ego a little bit in a moment he so desperately needed it. Their tongues were tangled together when Chris let his thick finger drag up and down her core, getting used to the feeling of her soft center that was so incredibly ready for him, but when he slid his finger up to feel her clit, Ellie had to pull away from his mouth as she gasped loudly. 

Chris started gently, rubbing extremely gentle circles along her sensitive button as Ellie laid her head back on the pillow. He couldn’t help but gaze at her, eyes shut tight while her pink swollen lips fell open as a long sigh fell from her mouth. She looked so beautiful laying there, making a wave of thankfulness wash over him that she had showed up in that bakery over a month ago. Although when he first met her, there was no way he would have dreamed that the sweet woman would soon be lying here in his bed, moaning out his name while he rubbed those perfect circles to drive her crazy. 

He saw her chest heaving as she labored for breath, his lips kissing along her neck, shoulder, collar bone and any other skin he could find while he kept working his fingers where she wanted him most. Ellie felt like her senses were on fire, loving that she felt him everywhere from the warmth of his body to the tickle of his beard and soft brown hair while he messily kissed and nipped along her skin. She loosely wrapped her arms around his shoulders, trying to pull his strong firm body even closer as his index finger started pushing a little harder and rubbing quicker circles that had her back arching while she squeezed her arms around him. 

Chris drank in all of the little noises that escaped her from her gentle gasps to sharp sighs, loving each and every one until her fingers dug into his back, clinging tightly as she inhaled loudly, cluing him in that she must have been right there. He sucked along the base of her neck as he kept up his tight circles, bringing her over her peak as she cried out, her body completely rigid before she seemed to completely melt into the bed, every inch of her relaxing into the soft blankets. 

His lips pressed a few kisses up her neck before finding her gorgeous relaxed face, placing a few sweet kisses to her cheeks and forehead, ready to lay down and see what would happen next. This softness, this calm energy that had settled over Ellie was something he wasn’t used to. Any previous experience in these situations was frantic before either an argument started or he left to go home, but as soon as Ellie was brought back to reality, she was grabbing for him. Ellie pressed her body up against him, pressing a few messy kisses at the edge of his mouth before finding his shirt and starting to tug at it. 

But suddenly that anxiety that seemed to always linger in the back of his head was thrust to the forefront. Although it wasn’t the first time he’d been in this situation with other women, it had been so long, and truly had never been like this before. He never was wanted for anything the way Ellie seemed to crave him, never desired. The few people he’d been with - including his ex and the tiny handful of random hookups he had early on in the divorce days - were purely out of a need to expel that energy, a need to handle the hormones. But Ellie seemed to just want him… for him. And that was something he didn’t know how to handle. 

He was so crazy for her, even if he was a little terrified to admit it, and that only made this so much more stress inducing. He wanted her so badly, and Chris knew he just couldn’t handle disappointing her. Although he knew Ashlee’s cheating wasn’t his fault, those feelings couldn’t help but haunt his mind a little bit. It gave him a lot of doubts in himself, and especially with his abilities in bed. Then, once he had a couple hookups after his divorced, and none had ever called back, it only added onto his doubts in himself. As if that wasn’t bad enough, it had been two years since he had a woman in this way and as bad as he wanted Ellie, he felt nothing but anxiousness at it all. 

Chris figured it must have shown too because Ellie stopped their kissing, pulling back as she just looked at him for a long moment, telling him, “Chris, we don’t need to do anything more.” 

He shook his head, whispering, “No, I-” 

“Seriously, Chris, that was amazing and I’m more than happy to stop,” she interrupted, a hand moving back and forth along his shoulder gently.

Chris was quiet for a moment before he admitted, “I want to… I'm just…” 

“I know baby, it’s okay,” she reassured him, leaning up and kissing him slowly before she pulled away and said,  “Let’s just get comfortable and relax, okay?” 

Chris’ brain reminded him that he had no clue how to do that, but Ellie seemed to read his mind, resting a hand on his bearded cheek before she leaned in to kiss him sweetly. She could feel the tension start to leave his shoulders as they kept kissing, and kissing… and kissing more. Ellie got her hands under his shirt, rubbing along his skin slowly before she finally got the shirt off of his body. 

He anxiously watched the look in her eyes as she looked him up and down, her hands coming out to rub along his firm chest, feeling his defined pecs underneath her touch that were covered in a few black tattoos and soft chest hair that only made him look even more manly to Ellie. She knew he was hot, that much was obvious, but actually getting to see what was underneath that shirt had her panties even wetter if that was possible. 

Ellie’s sole focus was helping Chris relax as she just kept kissing him slowly, no agenda while her hands ran along the muscular landscape of his body. She eventually helped him out of his jeans, still trying to go slow and give him plenty of opportunities to pull back but right when she was about to ask him how he was feeling and if he wanted to go any farther, those thick arms of his pulled her barely clothed frame on top of him, one of his hands running down her back and resting on one of her round cheeks, only half covered by her panties as he gave it a gentle squeeze. Suddenly she figured out that she didn’t need to ask him anymore if he wanted to go any farther. 

His kisses became passionate and needy as he kept kneading at her ass, his other hand coming up to tangle in her hair. She could feel his erection pressing against her through the confines of his boxers and just the feeling of how thick he was had her insides clenching. Eventually when she couldn’t breathe anymore, Ellie put her hands on his chest, pushing herself up so that she was straddling his waist. Chris was looking up at her through hooded lids, his lips swollen and parted as he breathed heavily, brown hair sticking up every which way and Ellie thought it was impossible for him to look any sexier than he did right now. His hands reached out to hold onto her hips, his thumbs rubbing small circles while she grabbed the bottom of her bralette, pulling it up and over her head, tossing it onto the floor. 

His eyes followed her movements, Chris feeling his boxers tighten as he swallowed and admitted, “If you’re trying to get me to relax, you’re not doing a very good job right now.” 

Ellie’s face scrunched with laughter, her head shaking. “I’m kind of glad,” she confessed with a shrug. 

“God, Ellie… you’re gorgeous,” he murmured, his eyes dropping momentarily before they met her eyes again. 

She practically melted from his words, her heart feeling so full as Chris effortlessly flipped her over so she was laying on her back, his hands on either side of her to hover on top. Chris’ mouth started pressing little kisses along her soft skin, coming down to press a few along the tops of her soft breasts, his mouth coming to wrap around one of her nipples, his tongue flicking across it while one of his hands laid on top of the other, delicately kneading it in his hand as he got to feel her for the first time. Hearing the way she gasped at his movements, her hands coming to run through his hair gave him the confidence to keep going, doting all the attention on her chest before moving down lower. 

His fingers were hooked in the band of her floral panties, his eyes flickering up to her one more time but at her soft nod and sweet smile, he pulled them off those long legs. When Chris’ blue eyes looked her up and down, seeing her completely bare to him for the first time, he could hardly believe it. She was here, laying naked in his bed wanting him. She wanted him just for him. She loved him. And nothing could have felt more incredible to Chris than that. 

All of that anxiety and stress was still there but he knew he wanted her. He was terrified to dive in, but Ellie was worth every bit of anxiety and he decided to overcome his stress and slip out of his own boxers. But when he saw Ellie’s eyes grow wide as she looked at him and a shiver ran down her spine, that gave him the little bit of a confidence boost he needed to position himself between her legs. 

“You ready, honey?” He asked, his eyes flicking up to meet hers. 

She almost moaned out, her legs moving to wrap around his trim hips as she whimpered, “Yes, please baby, I need you so badly Chris.” 

“You got me, Elles,” he murmured, and Ellie’s eyes shut tight as he drug his tip along her soaking wet slit before he gently pushed in so slowly that both of them were crying out as they clung to each other. 

She couldn’t seem to find her breathe while her walls adjusted to his thick size, loving the way he filled her so well and just how damn good he felt. She was so thankful that they’d talked about things prior and agreed they’d forgo condoms since Ellie was on the pill - which was another way he showed his full trust to her, only showing her what big strides he was making in trusting her fully. But she still could only seem to focus on how perfectly he seemed to fit in her, just how glorious this feeling was and with the way he was letting out those soft sighs, she figured he must have been thinking the exact same thing. Chris eventually pulled back before pushing in again gently, beginning to find that slow perfect rhythm. 

Neither could breathe very well as Chris started rocking his hips slowly, letting her feel every inch of his thick cock with each thrust dragging against her smooth walls. Ellie reached up, rubbing her hands on his chest for a long moment before he hit her particularly deep, making her fingers dig into his shoulders as she let out such a loud moan it made him twitch inside her. 

Chris’ blue eyes flickered down, watching Ellie’s body bounce slightly with each thrust, her chest heaving as she alternated between moaning and breathing. Her eyelids were closed shut but eventually slowly flickered open, landing right on his. Chris could feel his heart pounding from the way she so softly smiled at him and grabbed the back of his neck to pull him down on top of her, their chests pressed together while her lips found his and Chris’ hips kept up their steady motion. 

His arms snaked between her body and the mattress, holding her impossibly close against him, every inch of them touching in some way or another. He had never felt anything like this, realizing in that moment that he had never felt sex this way before. In the past, it had been purely physical, little or no emotion behind it. But this… this was so different. This gorgeous kindhearted woman who was kissing him so deeply, loved him. And he knew that he had fallen in just as deep, the connection they shared being unlike anything he’d ever experienced or even thought possible. 

Their lips pulled apart as Chris picked up his pace, both of them panting as they each were getting closer. Chris moved his arms so he was braced on his elbows on either side of her, nuzzling his face in the crook of her neck and kissing her a few times before he felt her hand slipping between their bodies. Knowing where she was going, he leaned his weight on one arm so he could use the other hand to gently push hers away, taking its place and starting up those methodical circles against her clit, making her arch her back, crying out his name and panting until she hit that beautiful peak. 

A low grunt escaped his lips when he felt her insides clenching him so perfectly, making it hard to keep thrusting, only getting three more before he held his hips inside her and came with a loud moan. His whole body felt weak from the exertion, beads of sweat along his forehead as they both tried to catch their breath. 

Her hand moved from clenching the muscle of his shoulder to the back of his head, running through the sweaty hair there. Chris tilted his head, pressing a few kisses to the skin there on Ellie’s neck as he basked in this feeling… for the first time ever. He was used to rolling off of each other, taking a shower alone, or just going to sleep immediately on opposite sides of the bed, but with Ellie’s hands holding him to her, he couldn’t help but indulge in this. 

They each relished in the afterglow until he gently pulled out and made his way into his bathroom, cleaning himself up before he came out with a washcloth and helped Ellie. Chris went back to toss the washcloth into the bathroom to be dealt with in the morning, sliding on a pair of sweatpants quickly before heading toward the bedroom door but before he could make it all the way out, a gentle voice stopped him. 

“Chris?” Ellie asked carefully, sitting up in bed as she gathered the comforter around her naked frame. “Aren’t you coming back to bed?” 

As he looked at her running a hand through her messy blonde hair, he couldn’t help but feel warm from her words. That simple question that showed him that she wanted to just be close to him was enough to cause his heart to melt right then and there. It reminded him that he wasn’t here with one of his relationships from the past, the connection after sex being nonexistent, he was here with Ellie. His girl. And she was nothing like he’d experienced before and everything he’d always wanted. 

Silently, Chris turned and opened up one of the dresser drawers, pulling out a navy pullover fire station sweatshirt and walked over to the bed to sit down next to Ellie. He grabbed the bottom of the sweatshirt, holding it out to her so that she could easily slip her arms and head into it, helping her pull it down around her naked frame to keep her warm. Chris then pulled the white comforter up farther before he leaned in to kiss her sweetly, causing Ellie to smile into the kiss. 

“Just going to get Dodger and turn out the lights, then I’ll be back,” he whispered, pecking her lips quickly again before he straightened up again and looked at her with a small smile. 

Chris hurried down the stairs, turning off the lights before finding Dodger roaming around in the kitchen. He scratched his head softly before telling him, “Alright bubba, it’s bedtime.” The sweet pooch followed behind Chris while he went over to fill up a glass of water, before going back up into the peacefulness of his bedroom. 

Ellie was already snuggled down into the bed and he was already internally deciding how he should ask her about Dodger. Ever since he got Dodger after his divorce, the sweet pup had slept in bed with him - even at the firehouse - but he wondered if she would even be alright with him sleeping in the bedroom. He was trying to figure out how to phrase the question but it got answered for him when Ellie sat up a little bit, patting the bed while she beamed, “Dodger! C’mere boy!” 

A smile crossed his face as he watched Dodger hop up, going straight to Ellie’s waiting arms and laying half on top of her as he licked her face, making her beautiful laugh echo in the room. He silently watched from the doorway as she doted all her attention on the pooch before turning her head, worried as she asked, “Sorry, I should have asked if it was alright if he got on your bed.” 

“Well considering he sleeps here every night, yeah, it’s okay,” Chris shrugged, crossing the room slowly and stepping over Hazel’s stray stuffed llama that was lying on the floor.

“Good because I think this poor guy would feel left out if he couldn’t sleep up here with us tonight,” Ellie laughed, jerking her arm away when Dodger tried to start licking it. 

“I brought you some water in case you were thirsty,” Chris told her quietly as he came over to Ellie’s side of the bed, bending down to put the water on the nightstand next to the bed as he watched the pair fondly. 

Her eyes were wide, a grin on her face as her eyes flickered from the glass of ice water back to his face, before moving to Dodger and back again. “You really are the sweetest man I’ve ever met,” she whispered.

Chris felt a blush spread across his cheeks, a sheepish look on his face while he shrugged and admitted, “I don’t think bringing water earns me that title.” 

“Well you’ve done quite a few other things that have bumped you up to that position,” Ellie trailed off, a single finger running over Dodger’s back. “My mother was right this evening when she said that you were a keeper.” 

Instantly a stronger blush filled Chris’ cheeks at the compliment, another thing he wasn’t used to, while he nervously scratched the back of his neck. Ellie just scooted over in the spacious bed, flipping back the covers to silently invite him in which he gladly accepted. He felt a little tentative at first, just laying on his back, unsure how Ellie would feel about his arms around her, recalling how little affection there was between him and Ashlee and how she always rejected his advances of such. 

But an unconscious smile slipped across his lips when Ellie immediately curled up against his side, laying her head on his shoulder while her arm wrapped around his firm middle and a leg lifted up to lay on top of his sweatpant covered thighs. Not feeling any reciprocation from him, she tilted her chin up, softly asking, “Is this okay?” 

Pulling him out of his internal thoughts, Chris looked down, bringing a hand to rest on her cheek as he assured her, “More than okay,” before he kissed her sweetly. It was quiet as they both relaxed into the bed, wrapped up in each other and happier than they knew possible. 

Ellie’s eyes opened slowly, taking a moment to come into focus, seeing a different room than she was used to seeing when she woke up in the mornings. Her eyes then shifted to look next to her, seeing the hunky sleeping firefighter right next to her. One of his hands was resting on his chest, the other resting up above his head, mouth hanging open as he soundly slept. She thought it seemed like a dream at first, not believing that last night could have been real, but as the memories started coming back to her, she remembered that it was. 

Dodger laid snoozing on the end of the bed as Ellie scooted a little closer to Chris, wanting the warmth his body was radiating but causing his eyelids to slowly flutter open at the movement. His blue eyes looked right at her, a closed mouth smile appearing on his handsome face before he reached out for her, pulling Ellie close before he closed his eyes again. 

His chin tucked on top of her head when Ellie rolled onto her side next to him, both of them taking the morning in slowly as he whispered to her, “Morning Elle Belle.” 

“Hi baby,” she quietly replied, a grin on her face as her fingers danced over his bare pecs. 

“Did you sleep well last night?” 

“So well,” she admitted, then frowned a bit. “I wish I didn’t have to go to work today so I could just sleep in.” 

“Hand me my phone, I’ll call Dottie and convince her to give you the day off,” Chris told her, Ellie glancing up to see a smirk on his face and his nose scrunched up.

“I know you could too, she adores you,” Ellie laughed along, but then sighed and frowned a little. “But I really need to go in. Dottie won’t be there today so I’m the manager. I still have an hour before I need to get ready though.” 

“Good,” Chris nodded. He reached for his phone, swiping through the notifications on it and told her,  “Looks like it snowed last night.” 

Ellie yawned loudly, relaxing against his firm body. “Yeah I think so.” 

“Can I drive you to work? I don’t want you to have to drive in fresh snow,” Chris asked her quietly, his hand moving down to rub her hip underneath the baggy fire station sweatshirt he’d given her. 

She smirked a little, shrugging and telling him, “You’re going to have to because my car is still at the bakery from yesterday.” 

“Oh my god, I totally forgot!” He laughed, his head leaning back against the fluffy pillow. “Was that only yesterday?” 

“Yeah, but a lot has happened since then,” Ellie shrugged playfully, rolling over a little so she was half on top of Chris and able to look him in the eyes easily.

“A lot of good stuff,” Chris agreed, his eyebrows raising as he pecked her lips quickly before she settled back onto his chest, a hand trailing along his chest. She took in the tattoos on his chest for the first time - seeing the long quote along his collarbone, a tattoo on his right rib cage, and one she immediately knew the meaning of stretched along his left pec - reading “Hazel” in delicate lettering. He stretched underneath her as his phone vibrated against the mattress, Chris reaching for it just as she began to trace his collarbone tattoo. 

“What time did you say you need to go in?” 

“I need to be there at nine,” she whispered, her finger moving over his skin and the smattering of hair there. 

“Okay, Ashlee is asking what time I’m coming to get Hazel so I’ll go get her after I drop you off.” 

“Chris…” Ellie trailed off, her brows furrowed deep in thought. “Does she know… about us?” 

“Not yet. When I brought her by the bakery I just introduced you as my friend,” Chris shrugged, his hand moving up and down along her back.

“No, not Hazel. Does Ashlee know about us?” 

She heard him open and close his mouth a few times, taking in a sharp intake of breath as he whispered,“Oh…” 

“Does she know?” Ellie repeated, turning her head up to look at him.

“She’s not really the easiest person to tell things to,” Chris whispered, a frown on his face. “I’m waiting to tell her until we’re both ready for you to meet Hazel as my girlfriend. Until then, it doesn’t really have anything to do with her. Ashlee can be… difficult so I’d rather wait until I have to.” 

Ellie nodded, her chin on his chest as her hand resumed its path along his tattoos. “I was just wondering.” 

“But I don’t want you to mistake that for not being serious about you, Elles,” he whispered, a small smile appearing when they met each other’s eyes. “I’m… really happy when I’m with you.” 

And Chris knew without a doubt how true those words of his were. He had never felt this way. Never felt this purely happy before except when he was with Hazel, and it was a feeling that he was ready to get used to. 

A/N: WE MELTED WRITING THIS CHAPTER. We really loved getting to write Chris and Ellie hanging out with her family for the first time and Chris getting redeemed in their eyes. Then, Ellie telling him those three words, and Chris knowing that they are truthful for the first time.... ever.... melts us! Oh and then the smut ;) We can't wait to hear your thoughts!