#it’s still elucien even when its not elucien is what I’m saying

[moonpatroclus]

🍂Elain🍃

𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦, 𝘴𝘩𝘦

𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘺, 𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘳𝘵��, 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘵𝘴

𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘴. 𝘐 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘱𝘵

𝘢𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦, 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦

𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘣𝘦𝘥, 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴

𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥

𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘴 𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴

𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘴. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵

𝘐 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘥𝘰𝘮𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘥𝘴

𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵

𝘐 𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘦𝘭𝘭, 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘰𝘮. 𝘉𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘥𝘰𝘻𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴

𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳.

- 𝘚𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐𝘯 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘍𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵, 𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘖𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳

When I first saw efellana_illustrations beautiful, whimsical artwork, I knew I needed to see Elain in their style. They were so wonderful to work with, and I’m so happy with how this piece turned out💕 I think that this poem by Mary Oliver goes so well with this artwork, and Elain as a character in general, so I had to include it. Personally, I think Elain deserves to spend more time frolicking through the woods, getting up to all sorts of witchy business, talking with the birds, and gazing into mysterious golden orbs.

Art by efellana_illustrations on Instagram, commissioned by me 🫶🏻

Please do not repost

[sad-scarred-sassy]

This is a wild Elucien headcanon…

but please imagine Lucien being in a really dangerous situation with the Autumn court, like something happened and they have him as a prisoner, or unable to leave.

And Elain is there listening to how Lucien could potentially be held captive in a cold cell or even tortured.

And shes there when Eris says the only way to save him is if he has real ties to the Night Court or if he officially becomes a member, and the only way to do that is if he gets mated/married to someone from there, not anyone, but the High Lady’s sister.

And everyone is outraged with what he is suggesting but Elain is suddenly quiet.

And she suddenly says “I will do it” and everyone gapes at her, some try to talk her out of it (possibly Feyre or Nesta) but Rhys just nods.

And they send notice to the Autumn court that they cannot harm Lucien because he is a Night Court citizen, but Beron doesn’t believe it, he demands that Elain goes there so he can determine it.

Chaos, outrage, but she agrees, and she obviously doesn’t go alone. She convinces herself that while she doesn’t owe Lucien anything, she is tired of the bloodshed, the loss, and if she has the power in her hands, she will act. That is all, she couldn’t care less about him. She convinces herself she would be this worried for anyone that is close to her sister, it’s not because shes worried and scared and petrified of something bad happening to him.

They’re in the Forest House, they bring out Lucien who is luckily generally unharmed but Elain looks at the binds in his wrists and her whole body reacts to the sudden urge to protect. Beron takes one sniff at them and knows it is true. They’re mates. But Beron says an unfulfilled mating bond is not valid (listen idk about these fae laws bear with me) they need to marry. Elain declares that was the plan all along. Lucien is shocked. (I just imagine what must be going through his head seeing his mate stand before Beron in the same room where Jesminda was killed)

They let Lucien go with his mate but they have to stay in the Forest House until everything gets resolved. Elain and Lucien are shoved into a room, no more chains on him, but he doesn’t understand any of it.

Both of them are standing awkwardly in the room. Lucien is staring at her as if she has grown ears, still shocked, still reliving moments, furious at them for being so dumb as to risk themselves for him. He supposed he really was a big asset for Rhys to have done this. But her… why was she here? Why did she put herself in this position?

“Did they make you do this?” He says through his teeth.

She muses on what to say. “No” she gets offended with the assumption that she can’t make decisions for herself. “I agreed to this and came on my own free will”

“Why would you do such a thing?”

“Because I’m tired of people dying, I wouldn’t forgive myself if I could have done something” A silence and for some forsaken reason Elain has the need to add. “This doesn’t mean what you think it means”

Something irks at Lucien then, and the awoken nerves on his body make him respond to that. “And please tell, Lady, what do I think it means?”

Elain clenches her fists. “That I’ve changed my mind about you… about this” She signals between them. “This is just temporary, out of necessity”

Lucien just stares at her.

“I never entertained that you did, I can assure you.” It is easier to turn on her, on this beautiful female that is putting herself at risk for him, than to be hurt at the continuing rejection from her. “You’ve always just assumed that I’m some brute fae that wants to steal you away, let me tell you now that we’re speaking frankly, that its not the case. I can’t control the pull from the bond, but I have no interest in pursuing a female who doesn’t want me”

That sends Elain to retaliate. “What about the gifts then, was that not pursuing?” She cocks her head arrogantly.

“I was bringing them to Feyre as well. That was me being polite, but guess you don’t know the first thing about that”

“You are one to talk about politeness when I’m here risking my life for your neck and this is how you treat me” She takes one step closer.

“I never asked you to do it” He mirrors her and steps closer with his broad hands clenched in fists.

“I will just let you die next time then”

“Fine by me, as long as I don’t have to endure you shoving it on my face”

“Asshole”

“I’ve been called worse” A sly, angry smile creeps at one corner of his mouth. She suddenly realizes they’re breathing on each other’s face.

“And all this time I thought you were a gentleman” She summons her anger to keep focused.

“You will learn I can be a gentleman, Elain” Her name on his lips, for the first time. “But I can be so much worse too”

His breath is hot on her face, their hearts already beating fast.

“You admit you were pretending then, to win me over”

A sharp breathy laugh from him. “If I wanted to win you over, I would not have tried to be gentle”

Her lips form a thin line as she holds herself, the pull, his words, the sudden effect of his mismatched gaze intense on her face.

“You shouldn’t have done this” He says quietly, roughly, his eyes showing something beyond just annoyance, she sees the fear in them. She pushes it back.

“What’s done is done” She says. “We will pretend, see this through, and then we’re done”

“Alright, dove”

She’s startled. Her nostrils flare. She ignores the outrageous pet name he just used on her. “I’m going to take a bath, I suggest you do the same, you stink” She begins to walk away and stops herself “I mean after I’m done” She frowns as she strolls away.

He watches her with sudden amusement.

He’s scared, hes pissed and hurt. He’s tired. But something inside him sparks, and he can’t really put a name to it.

Oh he’s not alright.

[areyoudreaminof]

some word salad behind the cut

I never thought I’d ever get into writing. My self esteem is so minimal it’s nearly non existent, so I had never bothered to try. But I started writing last year and found I was enjoying it. I made grand plans to write more until I didn’t.

My passion became my poison, suddenly.

As I scrolled through endless fics and writers much more talented than I am, my anxiety perched itself on my shoulder like a crow and squawked in my ear.

“The shit you’re putting out? No wonder nobody is reading it. You’re writing boring stuff. Who gives a fuck about kids and one shots?” It would say. I’d reply that I didn’t want to write smut. I don’t like doing it and it felt silly.

“So why are you writing at all?” Anxiety Crow said, “That’s what people want. And you can’t even do that.”

It came to a head right before Elucien Week. Last year, I wrote three fics I am still immensely proud of. One of which opened a door for me with the first Next Gen characters I came up with. I had assumed that I’d have something else lined up for this year's Elucien Week.

But in that year, I had a lot of personal changes and mental health challenges that weren’t getting better. I made the mistake of starting a long fic and it became this beast that I couldn’t tame. Even one shots and snippets became a chore. I’d have to force myself to finish a chapter, to try and translate the images I saw in my head to paper, but it wasn’t working. This coincided with my depression peaking in early 2024, in which I got suicidal and had to seek help.

By January, I’d gotten more frustrated with my writing, by June, I despised writing in its entirety. Three days before Elucien Week was due to begin, I hovered my mouse over DELETE ACCOUNT on AO3 and nearly trashed a year worth of work. I decided to take a step back to clear my head and to put a stop to this toxic competition I had with myself. I didn’t want to lose the hobby I’d grown to love and destroy the new friendships I’d made. I was absolutely terrified of losing those wonderful friends I’ve made and I felt so guilty and angry at myself for fumbling the bag and not writing anything.

I can’t even tell you why I obsessed over it, I may never go back to writing at all, but the weight of that self hatred has eased up from my chest. It’s not eating me alive anymore. That’s not to say it’s gone of course. Just the other day I had another major moment of doubt, and nearly trashed everything, again. I’m trying to parse through my own mind constantly to sort out my own spirals and triggers. Some days it’s working, others it’s not.

I think I’m now telling you about it, because I’m sure you’re feeling it too. People reached out to me to check on me when I left and others to let me know they were having the same problems. The feelings of inferiority among fandom, the nagging expectations we placed on ourselves. Never mind any of the challenges we face in our daily lives. What’s the worth of my mental health and happiness and why the fuck do I keep measuring it like this?

Whatever comes of this break, I hope that all of us can find our self worth, wherever it is. I see so many incredible artists, writers, and people that inspire me to want to keep going. If you’re reading this, you’re one of them.

Take a breath and take a break. We’ll figure it out.

[elainsgirl]

Someone said that most Elriels exist because they haven’t read the bonus chapter, which surprised me. Because theres still a ton of elriels who read the BC and still love them.

Quick story - While reading the series, I wasn’t very interested in Azriel and Elain, (probably because I was so focused on feyre and rhys, I love them so much) though I could tell there was something between them, especially when he gave her Truth-Teller. I even found myself agreeing with Feyre when she said, “Why not make them mates?”

But then, I was scrolling on ACOTAR TikTok and found out there was a bonus chapter about Azriel and Elain. I looked it up, read it, and let me tell you—I was kicking my feet and everything! I didn’t see anything bad about it. I think that’s why I didn’t know anything about “Gwynriel,” since I stopped reading after Rhys and Az finished arguing.

Then people started saying Azriel feels entitled to Elain? I’m like, what?! Where did this even come from? He was always so sweet to her throughout the books. I always thought they were a slow-burn thing, like they’d gradually develop feelings for each other. I’ve seen worse arguments, too, its crazy. How did they get that from one bonus chapter?

Like, whenever I saw scenes with Lucien and Elain, I’d always think, “That’s Azriel’s mate!” because there’s no way they aren’t mates after everything we’ve seen. Azriel was totally valid in questioning the Cauldron.

Honestly, I always thought that after this bonus chapter, the next book would focus on Azriel, Elain, and Lucien. It’s wild how much drama has started because of a bonus chapter. People take things too seriously, like just enjoy the book. No need for threats, majors, and saying messed up things to people online because of fictional characters/ships.

Hey anon 🫶 (buckle up this is long)

”most elriels exist because they haven’t read the bonus chapter” - that shouldn’t matter at all. The next main character and couple should be obvious from ACOSF itself - a bonus should not be needed to “understand” the next book. Interestingly, people who read ACOSF without the bonus come to the conclusion that elriel is endgame. Not Gwynriel. That tells you everything you need to know,

people need to remember the bonuses aren’t “known” by the entire fandom. In a hypothetical sense, if you presume Mass has 10 million readers world wide - out of that let’s say 6-7 million have read Azriel’s bonus chapter- that still leaves out a good chunk of readers. Every single reader suspects something between elriel from the books. If the next book is elriel - literally no one would be suprised. However if its Gwynriel? You have a good portion of readers in the millions that will be confused- no author would do that certainly not one that said the next character/couple was obvious.

You’re completely right, Lots of elriels love Azriels bonus chapter, we just don’t give it unnecessary significance because our ship doesn’t need the bonus. It was a nice treat that foreshadowed what was to come and the stakes at risk for elriel, gwyns power and that’s it. I know some of my elriel mutuals go back and reread the bonus often.

I agree with you in not being interested in elriel from the start - for me personally, I was rlly rooting for elucien during acomaf and then I went into acowar excited for the way Mass would handle them especially considering where they left off. I liked Elain & Lucien, whilst I didn’t care much for Az - it seemed obvious he would end up with Mor. There comes acowar and you have Feyre questioning the cauldron being wrong - finding out not all mates are right for each other (obviously that will tie in for eluciens story) and then when Feyre said, “why not make them (elriel) mates?)” I knew that was the end of Elain and Lucien. Feyre is THE main character, her observations and ponders matter so the sole fact Sjm had Feyre observe elriel constantly- how they did things for each other that they’ve never done for anyone else and then thinking negatively about Elain and Lucien (literally cringing at the thought of them) it’s obvious the direction Mass is trying to steer us readers in.

I also found out about the bonus through acotartok, so jynx. I simply didn’t care enough to read about it -and then I didn’t read the bonus out of pure pettiness. I had finished the series, knew who the next book is about, I wasn’t passionate about elriel & liked elucien enough to enjoy content about them, overall though I just wanted to move on with other books however my fyp kept on showing me ACOTAR videos and eventually I learnt about the ✨ shipwars ✨ which to 15 year old me was the most stupidest thing ever. Elriel was blatantly obvious so to see people genuinely doubting them & arguing otherwise made me realise…well to put it in a polite way, how *dim* some people act. Through these videos I learnt there was a whole ship that honest to god thought Azriel would have his book next along with Gwyn. Let me tell you anon, I was flabbergasted. Shocked. Stumped. No where in ACOSF had I noticed anything between Azriel and Gwyn, also why would Gwyn - a new character we’ve just met get a pov before THE Elain Archeron, one of the OG characters? Like if Gwyn was *that* important- wouldn’t she hVe been introduced earlier? Also I thought these books soley followed Female protagonists that would take the lead so an Az book was never in the cards for me.

Once I did learn of Azriels bonus - I still didn’t read it, as I said earlier out of pure pettiness. I found it hilarious when I’d tell gwynriels that I hadn’t read the bonus, the convos would usually go something like this,

“No elriel isn’t endgame. The shadows hide from Elain and hate her meanwhile they danced for Gwyn its clear she is Azriels mate”

“when did this happen in ACOSF?” “It happened in a bonus chapter”

“But if the shadows singing around Gwyn meant so much, wouldn’t it have been included in the book?”

“Ofc sjm wouldn’t have included it in ACOSF, she didn’t want to take the attention of Nessian!”

“but…doesn’t Sjm write Azriel and Elain blushing around each other and stuff?”

“Yeah bcs elriel will have a relationship then break up. Look, you have to read Azriel’s bonus to understand. Elriel isn’t endgame, gwynriel is”

You get the gist, however once I started making ACOTAR content I had to read the bonus to obviously understand context of things and know what im up against.

Anon, istg I can’t even begin to explain the disappointment and complete lack luster Gwyn and Azriels part was. Im not going to go into detail bcs this post is already long but honestly I was disappointed in Gwynriels for straight up lying. Till this day im still a little bitter.

When someone tells me Azriel feels entitled to Elain, I just know they’re pathetically trying to grasp at straws to make their ship and Li seem better for Elain. An entitled man doesn’t stay away, he doesn’t wait for offer & permission. You can dispute this take till you’re blue in the face but it won’t matter, when you’re in denial you don’t care about common sense. You know, I have to give it to GA/EL stans for managing to manipulate, gaslight and straight up lie to so many people, they really took hold of the narrative straight after acosf and twisted it to fit their ships and it worked so well due to elriel being majorly disliked. Let’s say, you have to eat something you really hate - but then I come along offering a “better” option, ofc you’re going to take up my offer. That’s what happened when it comes to the shipwars.

Azriel questioning the cauldron- Mirroring Feyre in acowar and it happened both times in regards to Elucien - Sjm cannot mKe it obvious that elucien are wrong mates and elriel are the correct pairing, anybody would question the cauldron In Azriel’s position- its the most sane, logical thing to do.

Same here, The next book has always been elriel, Lucien will come in when Elains bond is being explored. Then imo, I always thought Lucien would have the next novella. 4 years later and I can say im not suprised at the ship war like I once was. When you hate something- you will do anything to find a better option. But absolutely, people take this way too seriously. Anyone who is threatening real life people over made up characters love lives’ need to seek help and go outside to regenerate their brain cells. You do not need your major to understand these books. Its a little worrying you need to utilise such advance knowledge for silly little faerie romances. This is not shakespeare, or any other complex piece of literature. The foreshadowing is in your face. It’s obvious. Its cliche.

At the end of the day, we have our own preferences, foreshadowing and comprehension. It will never be deep enough to go and hurt someone’s feelings over these books or say disgusting things in hopes to rile people up.

[starsreminisce]

Every once in a while, there is some comment that suggests Elain and Lucien's mating bond is off or fake. I actually argue quite the opposite, and I think Lucien is intuitively attuned to Elain's emotions, and their bond is the strongest between the three sisters. I also think that when Elain is not doing well, Lucien starts showing up more.

This makes his appearance during ACOSF solstice even more interesting to me, given that he was absent for ACOSAF's solstice, both of them declaring that they can't stand to be around each other.

Feysand's bond is mental, Nessian's bond is physical, and Elucien's bond is emotional. I also think this manifests in how each of the sisters pushed away from their mate: Feyre thinking she should still be with Tamlin, Nesta randomly hooking up with random males. I also think it's how their mate helped their respective partner heal. Feyre and Nesta are similar in that both don't want to be weak or helpless anymore, but the end of their healing was marked differently. Feyre's was marked when she secured the Ouroboros with a message that suggests the mental power needed with a statement like "Only you can decide what breaks you," and Nesta's was marked by the Blood Rite.

We can go through the end of ACOMAF and the parts in ACOWAR where Lucien has been the only one advocating for Elain and just knowing what she needs while giving enough distance to prevent overwhelming her.

The part that sticks out to me was when Lucien decided to find Vassa, and he specifically said that "I’m not needed here. I’ll fight if you need me to." They were left alone for the first time, Elain wanted to stop him but she didn't, and he left to fulfill her prophecy.

The next scenes we had Elain enjoying herself to make bread (an act associated with accepting the bond, just saying), Elain speaking up to use her to convince Graysen to do something for the humans, we find out that Lucien is the heir to the Day Court (fulfilling Elain's need for sunshine), Elain's “His name is Lucien."

When was the next time we saw Lucien and Elain together? After Hybern had been defeated, and he came running to her, spying the blood on her hands and asking if she was okay, then offering his condolences and then his praise. I also have to remind y'all that Azriel saw her first and said nothing when she forced Truth-Teller back to him. In his bonus chapter, he didn't have a thought in regards to this either.

In ACOSAF, people also ignore that Lucien tried to be there for Elain, and she was "too polite" to turn him away until he got the hint and left. What stood out to me, though, was during the Solstice, it was Lucien who told Elain not to be troubled because he wouldn't be staying for long, and it was Lucien who turned down Feyre's invitation to both stay for the festivities and stay in Velaris for two weeks to "get to know Elain" before announcing that he would be moving in with Jurian and Vassa. Elain was in a pretty good place at this point in time.

However, in ACOSF, we get this little nugget:

But Elain said, “I went into the Cauldron, too, you know. And it captured me. And yet somehow all you think of is what my trauma did to you.”

On top of that, Elain and Nesta became estranged, Azriel pulling back his interactions with her, her being denied to search for the trove or being prevented from doing more than just tending to her little garden.

Is it a coincidence that Elain insisted on attending the Hewn City Solstice, knowing that its cruelty bothered her, was described as wearing pearl barrettes, and then the following day, Lucien was at the Inner Circle solstice, seemingly recanting his stance of not being able to stand to be around her for two minutes and his present of pearl earrings.

I don't think it's meant to be cruel on his behalf, considering he tried to hide his disappointment from her reaction upon receiving his present, but I do wonder if it's meant to be a statement that he sees what she's trying to do and trying to be as supportive as he could while still allowing her to dictate how their interactions would go.

Some people demand two extremities: either he is around too much or he doesn't care enough to try, but they fail to see how perfectly middle-ground Lucien is being. He is still accessible for her while allowing her to choose if she wants to interact with him.

ACOSAF Solstice = Elain happy and excited over cooking for everyone = Lucien saying he is not staying.

ACOSF Solstice = Elain pushing back on attending Hewn City, a place that brings her discomfort = Lucien staying for that Solstice.

Elain and Lucien are both capable of voicing out when things bother them, especially towards each other, as seen in ACOSAF, but I don't think if Lucien knew he was not wanted by her in ACOSAF solstice, he wouldn't have attended ACOSF solstice. He also would not have attended the Starfall in the later months, especially if there had been secret progress between her and Azriel.

Rhys came to Feyre's aid when she called for help mentally as she walked down the aisle, Cassian came to Nesta's aid when she was physically at her weakest, so it makes me wonder if Elain is approaching an emotional tipping point where she can't keep pretending that everything is fine when she sees both her sisters successfully moved on from their trauma because of help from their mates, Nesta especially.

We also have to acknowledge that the scent of their bond is strong a year later. I wonder if this manifested with Cassian asking Lucien where Elain was when he visited their training and Nesta calling Elain a wrench for staying far away from him as confirmation they too smell it. I would go so far as to wonder if that's why Rhys specifically brought up that Lucien has a right to the blood duel to Azriel because he smelled their bond. The only person that smell mattered to is Azriel.

So yeah, all in all, if SJM wanted to continue the train that Elain would reject the bond, she would have made other choices in ACOSF, starting with Vassa's development, Cassian's observations that Lucien is adamant about not being in Velaris, Elain trying to get closer to Azriel, Nesta flat out saying that it was Elain that Azriel was pining over by the fire, and it would have continued after Solstice where Azriel and Elain nearly kissed.

Instead, SJM chose to make their only interaction with that Lucien still looks at Elain with longing and Elain's bravado disappearing when he did.

[yearning-for-autumn]

Sweet Indifference || Elucien angst fic ||

Word Count: 1,150

Pairing: Lucien x Elain

Warnings: Some strong language, angst

Summary: Lucien walks Elain home from Rita's and gets his arse handed to him. Angsty angst and some fluff because I love these two and they deserve a little happiness, as a treat.

A/N: I battled with this fic if i'm honest, but I couldn't give up on it. I love these characters so much, and say what you will about endgame pairings, I really just wanted to explore these two, and their potential. Thank you so much @fandomsmultiverse for reading this through!!

Lucien stared at her in shock. His usually well-guarded features open to her for the first time since the Cauldron. Elain stood in the hallway, shoulders heaving as all the anger – meticulously hidden behind sweet smiles and manicured gardens – felt intimately on display.

Guilt coursed through her as soon as she snapped at Lucien. Looking at him now, there was no denying that she had hurt him, and that had never been her goal, even from the start. He was a pleasant male. But that didn’t mean she wanted to be mated to him.

They had been on their way back from Rita’s, it having been one of the rare occasions that Elain was convinced to join her sisters, and Lucien had asked to walk her home. She had neither refused, nor had she really accepted, so she just tolerated his company on her journey home.

A few years ago she had finally decided to move into a place of her own. It was a small apartment overlooking the Sidra and it suited her fine. Feyre had seemed overjoyed that she was finally comfortable enough to be on her own and Elain was happy to let her think that, not wanting to reveal the real reason – that every night she awoke terrified and unsure whether her nightmares were visions, or fictitious. Not wanting to keep anyone awake, she decided it was best if she had a place to herself.

Her frustration grew with every passing minute alone in Lucien’s company.

“How is the new apartment?” He asked, and she really didn’t want to discuss that with him at all, she hummed,

“Nice.” She said. He gave her a small smile and she avoided his gaze.

“The Sidra is lovely to look at isn’t it. I have a view from my apartment as well, it reminds me of the lakes and rivers of home.” He tried again.

“Mhm.” Elain brushed him off, as she always did.

With a dejected look, he fell back a step. Elain let out a quiet sigh as that usual guilt crept up on her. It was habit now, to ignore him, and – stubborn as she was – it was near impossible to break it now. Not to mention humiliating.

Elain made her way up the stairs to her apartment and Lucien followed, seemingly intent on walking her all the way to the door. She bit back a growl as she fished out her keys, Lucien still waiting behind her, and unlocked the door, hoping that when she turned he would have made himself scarce. Of course, when she did, Lucien was still lingering in the doorway. This time she did growl.

“Cauldron would you just leave?” She snapped, surprising herself with the very Fae phrase that escaped her. It only served to upset her more.

“Can you not think of anything better to do than to bother me? I think I have made it perfectly clear I don’t want anything to do with you, and frankly—” and she really lost all sense of what she was saying, hands fisted in her hair and cheeks flushed, “—frankly I wouldn’t fuck you if you were the last male in all of Prythian. And I refuse to be forced into it just because some-some pot told you I was Made for you!”

She breathed heavily. Lucien didn’t respond for a few, silent moments, staring at her as she tried to regain any dignity she had left. He was oddly still, even his mechanical eye that was always whirring or flickering was preternaturally still in its socket.

“Is that really how you feel, Elain?” Her name on his lips was a melody that calmed her, despite her minds wishes. “I’m not here to fuck you. I’m not here for anything. I’m just—I’m trying to be your friend.”

Elain’s breath caught in her throat and she dropped her shoulders.

“I thought I had found my mate,” Lucien continued, “years ago, before you were Made, perhaps even before you were born. She was murdered by my father whilst I was forced to watch, and since then I have given up on the chance of finding another. When you were spat from the Cauldron, I was just as confused as you were, and yes I shouldn’t have said anything, but for the first time I had the smallest glimpse of hope.” He took a shuddering breath and Elain could say nothing to comfort him.

“Elain, I would never do anything to hurt you. I will leave you alone if it’s what you truly want. But please don’t make me leave the Night Court. Feyre is my friend. Seeing you flinch every time I appear in a room you are in is killing me, even if you detest me.”

There was desperation in his eyes, in his voice, Elain could smell it in the air. A scared little boy with few friends, and no home. To force him to leave the only people he had would be a terrible thing indeed, she knew that for certain. Lucien’s eyes were trained on the floor in the way of respectful gentry. He was everything Grayson should have been all those years ago, if only she loved him as fiercely as she loved that human. A misplaced love. It wasn’t something she could think about so instead she took a small step towards him, watching his eyes flicker up in surprise.

“I’m sorry about your mate.” She said, the best she could do, whilst fiddling with the delicate bracelet around her wrist.

“She wasn’t my mate.” Lucien stated, matter-of-factly. He seemed to struggle with his words, a far cry from the polished Emissary. He wrung his hands. “Look. I can’t change the decisions the Mother has made. I don’t pretend to understand how the Cauldron works any more than you do. But I would never try to force you into anything, you forget I have as little choice as you do in this matter.”

Elain saw the eyes of a male who thought she truly hated him, and guilt settled deep in her gut.

“I don’t dislike you.” She offered.

“Then why do you refuse to look at me?” Lucien pressed.

“I’m not ready for another relationship.”

“Nor am I.” He confessed, and despite all he had said, Elain found herself surprised. “I just want us to be able to talk.” He said.

Elain loosed a breath and Lucien started turning to leave, but she stepped forward hurridly. Her arm darted out and without thinking she had grabbed his wrist,

“Lucien.” He whipped around, looking down at her hand as if her touch had branded him “I’ll put the kettle on. There are books on the coffee table, or cards. I don’t—I’m not good company. But I want to try...friends?”

Lucien’s mouth twitched upwards in a small smile.

“Friends.” He agreed. And he stepped inside.

[greenleaf777]

Being relatively new to this fandom I just have to say that this Acotar fandom is unbelievable disrespectful to each other in term of ship wars. Where’d the etiquette go?. I see NONSTOP anti-shippers posting/reblogging/commenting/harassing on the ship posts they don’t agree with. On insta, tiktok, tumblr, twitter, etcetc. Also tagging ships that are not related to the post or tagging ships/characters you are making fun of is pretty low of you.

Am I the only one that has absolutely lost their patience with it. Just some examples cause it happens with ALL ships. Do not start discussing how elucien or gwynriel is better on a artists fanart of Elriel. If i was an artist trying to show my love for something and someone did that i would lose my shit on them. Or don’t post about how awful Nesta is on a nessian or nesta appreciation post. Or Don’t tell an azris(whatever eris and az ship is called not sure) that azriel and elain are true mates on their post. Why would you even do that in the first place?

If you see a post about a ship someone is celebrating that has nothing to do with your ship why are you pushing your ship or opinion on said ship on other people? WHY?

Mind your own business. Make your own post. Ship whatever you want. Pushing your ship on others is rude and won’t make them change their mind and will in fact make people angry and start fights. Thats the WHOLE POINT of tagging things and blocking tags too.

If you think i’m out of my mind thinking Elaine and Azriel will be endgame in the next book leave me to my delusions please. Thanks

Its also very hard to avoid ships/topics that can cause triggers when they are everywhere you look.

No matter how mean and rude you are about your ship SJM is still not going to write what you want and instead will write whatever she pleases, so just live in peace for gods sake. What will be will be.

If you think you should be able to start fights and be disrespectful let me know here so i can block you, thanks.

Also just curious what is the bryce and azriel ship called?

[infiniteetcetera]

Hot take of the day is Gwynriel has loads of chemistry and Elucien plenty of potential but I’d still rather see Elriel together for the sake of the plot…

What I mean by that is I think an Azriel/Gwyn & Elain/Lucien love story is the path of least resistance for SJM. It fits perfectly into the “everyone is mated and happy together” stereotype much more so than Elain/Az, especially if (as most people predict) Emerie and Mor also wind up together.

I love the Valkeryies and their relationship too much for them to just be absorbed by the IC and that’s exactly what I feel would happen if we get Gwyn/Az, Elain/Lucien, and Emerie/Mor. If Azriel winds up with Gwyn it’s highly likely we’ll get an “i told you so” moment from Rhys who will continue believing he is right about everything and that its totally okay to control the lives of his so called family. Nessian will remain strong and Nesta will be even further solidified in the Night Court (FREE HER) if her two closest friends become IC equivalents.

On the Elain side of things, so many people seem to imply her being with Lucien would be an escape from the Night Court but Rhys wants Elain with Lucien because it’s a way to drag Lucien further into the Night Court. He’s already using their bond to manipulate diplomacy with Lucien and no matter where Lucien ends up, if he’s mated to Elain he will be stuck with strong ties to the Night Court and so will she.

I think Elain/Azriel are the only option that could really push and fuel change for the IC. Rhys drawing a line in the sand about their relationship forces the members of the inner circle to genuinely have to pick sides and I think it would really push Feyre and Nesta to confront their own relationships with their mates and the Night Court. And honestly I’ve always found it ironic that so many people use the “Elain doesn’t belong in the Night Court” argument against Elriel because Azriel doesn’t belong in the Night Court either.

As early as ACOMAF Azriel tells Feyre he doesn’t feel like he belongs in the NC. We’ve seen countless times throughout the series he is left out, ignored, and manipulated by his so called family. People like Rhys and Mor who are the “closest” to him have admitted to being lowkey afraid of him, most of the IC admits they know little about his thoughts/feelings, and its not one of his oldest friends but Nesta who comforts him while he isolates himself during a holiday when he’s feeling like absolute trash because he feels that lonely and unworthy.

I think it would make perfect sense for Azriel to leave the Night Court with Elain, maybe even with Nesta and the Valkeryies considering both him and Nesta have been tied to the Dawn Court now and Nesta made a point of saying she is not a member of the NC. I’m not saying we’d get a full on Nessian break up (I can dream) or that Feyre is going to leave Rhys (SJM will never do this) but I do think Nesta and Feyre would both pull for their sister’s happiness. Especially for Nesta, I feel like part of why she takes how Cassian and the IC treats her is because she feels worthless and doesn’t think she deserves better, but if there’s anyone Nesta will stand up for it’s Elain and hearing that Rhys is manipulating her love life could be such a good catalyst for this girl to move on (my dream crack theory, she leaves Cas in Elains book, Lucien’s book is Autumn Court centered and we get a Nesta/Eris redemption romance arc)

Overall I think the effects that would result from Az leaving the NC with Elain however it happens has the potential for the most complex and intriguing story. I’m sure both Gwynriel and Elucien could be perfectly happy couples, if they get books I will read them and they will probably be fine because SJM knows how to write romance (tho sometimes, I have my doubts recently 👀) but these two relationships don’t have much potential to spark the big changes in the ACOTAR universe Id like to see for the Archeron sisters (and babyboys Az and Lucien). If SJM doesn’t keep doing weird things like the necklace situation, I think Elain and Azriel make perfect sense as a couple and the breaking of the status quo they symbolize is just what the world at large needs.

[vulpes-fennec]

@elainweekofficial Day 2 🌱

Elain loves to garden, so here's a moodboard of her garden at the River House! Read below the cut for an Elucien one-shot 🦔

Gardening required precision: the right soil composition, watering frequency, timing of planting, and placement. But it also required leniency, for the pollinators, animals, and weather systems that played a role were out of Elain’s control. 

Which was why Elain strung up bird baths and propped up old pots for toads. She left the spiders and praying mantises alone, even though they scared her. She suppressed the urge to tidy everything into neat arrangements, knowing that a little messiness was beneficial for the ecosystem.

Gardening had its fair share of physical work, too. Elain was not a warrior like Feyre or Nesta, but she still flexed her muscles by lugging the watering can around, yanking out weeds, digging up roots, and vanquishing the pests and plant illnesses. 

Gardening was the satisfaction of watching the spring buds flower, of biting into the first summer harvest. But out of everything, experiencing warm sunshine on her skin was Elain’s favorite part of gardening. 

It was shaping up to be a perfect day, she thought. Already Elain had changed the bird bath, refilled the bird feeder, turned the compost pile, pruned the bushes, and inspected the budding fruit trees. She was in the middle of harvesting a bundle of herbs for dinner when she heard distressed squeaking coming from around the bend. 

“Oh no!” Elain cried when she spotted the source of the squeaks. A large hawk had a small creature clasped in its talons, and was taking flight. “Stop! Stop this right now!” 

The animal squirmed its way out of the hawk’s grip and fell several feet to the ground, to Elain’s horror. She rushed over immediately, finding a small hedgehog dragging its hind foot as it struggled towards a brambly hedge. 

“You poor thing!” Elain exclaimed. The hedgehog curled into a ball of brown and black spikes when she approached. Elain knelt down in the grass, cooing softly. “It’s alright little one. You’re safe with me.” 

The hedgehog did not seem to think so. It let out another cry of terror when Elain gingerly touched it. She winced at the spines pricking her calloused palms. A quick glance revealed the hawk waiting patiently in the tree for its afternoon snack, its beady yellow eyes glaring at Elain. 

“Go away!” she shouted up at it. “Don’t you dare come any closer!” She turned her attention back to the hedgehog, who was trembling in fear thanks to her raised voice. 

“I didn’t mean you, little one,” Elain whispered softly, hunching over the hedgehog. “Please don’t be afraid. I only want to help you.” Bracing herself against the temporary pain, Elain gently scooped the curled hedgehog up and placed it into her straw hat. 

Gravel crunched urgently behind her.  

“My lady?” The emissary of the Night Court stood just a few yards away from her, looking like he’d been running. Lucien Vanserra. Her mate. 

Elain stiffened. “What are you doing here?” The words came out sharper than she’d intended, and she regretted using them as her first line of greeting. 

Lucien’s flaming red hair glinted in the sun like molten ore, his russet eye studying her carefully. The scar cutting down his face only drew attention to his angular features. It had been several weeks since Elain saw him last, and every time he reappeared in her life, his handsome face seemed to grow begrudgingly more attractive. “I came to hand deliver an invitation for Queen Vassa’s coronation,” he replied. “To Feyre and Rhysand, but it seems they’re nowhere to be found.” 

“They’re at the Hewn City.” Elain’s words were a frank dismissal to her ears. She winced.

Lucien’s mouth tightened. “Well, I heard you shouting at something so forgive me for making sure you were alright.” 

I don’t need your protection, Elain wanted to say, but she kept her mouth shut. Her good manners always eluded her whenever she saw Lucien Vanserra. 

“I’m fine. It’s just a hedgehog with an injured foot. I’ll have to send for Madja tomorrow morning.” 

“Broken limbs should be set and healed as soon as possible. Waiting until morning may be too late.” Lucien frowned slightly. “I can try to help.” 

“You’re not an animal healer,” she objected. 

“No, but I did fix your sister’s broken nose under the mountain.” Lucien’s good eye flickered with the faint memory of the traumatic hellhole. 

I don’t need your help, Elain wanted to say, but the hedgehog’s shrill vocalizations begged to differ. “Alright,” she admitted. “We can go to the greenhouse.” 

The creature was shaking like a leaf when Elain set the hat down on the surface of the greenhouse work table. The surface was littered with gardening notes and bottled tonics. A cupboard, filled with seeds and dried flowers stood opposite a shelf of gardening tools. And every other available space was filled with plants. 

The greenhouse was sizable, but the space felt small and hot the moment Lucien stepped over the threshold. He stood silently in the doorway, golden eye clicking and whirring at the haphazard interior. 

She had gauze and healing salves…but perhaps ointments that worked on the Fae would be toxic for animals. The enchanted gloves Lucien gifted her were carefully tucked in a box. Elain had barely used them, only taking them out occasionally to admire its make. But perhaps it was time to put away that stubborn pride…Elain glanced over her shoulder furtively at her mate.

“Hello, aren’t you a cute little thing?” Lucien greeted the hedgehog as he bent down until he was eye level with the table. “My name is Lucien, Night Court’s emissary.” 

He extended a tanned brown hand towards the creature. The hedgehog peeked out at the emissary, unfurling itself to sniff his fingers with its pointed nose. “That’s right, there’s nothing to be afraid of.” 

“What do we do?” Elain approached the table anxiously. 

Surprise flitted across Lucien’s face at the sight of her gloved hands. “If you could sit and hold the hedgehog so I can see the leg…”

“It’s me, Elain,” she cooed to it, extending her hand just as Lucien did. “I’m going to have to pick you up now.” The hedgehog shrank away, and Elain’s shoulders slumped in disappointment.

“You can do it,” Lucien said encouragingly. “I’m talking to the hedgehog, but I suppose it applies to you as well.” 

“Why does it like you more than me?” Elain demanded indignantly.

Lucien’s grin was positively smug. “Hedgehogs were quite prevalent in the Autumn Court. They thought quite highly of me.”

Elain rolled her eyes at him. “Come on now. Up onto my hand we go. You’ve seen me around the garden, haven’t you? I’m not a stranger.” The hedgehog reluctantly limped onto her outstretched hand. “Good job, little one!” 

Elain’s heart pounded anxiously as she settled on the chair, for the creature seemed so frail and small. The hedgehog scrunched up its small face, crying out as she shifted it onto its back. Elain gasped when she noticed several red lacerations on its furred underbelly. “Cauldron, it’s worse than I thought,” she fretted. “And I think it’s a female.” 

“Hmmm, you’re right.” Lucien murmured as the hedgehog made more high-pitched whimpering sounds. “Shhh, it’s alright, sweetheart. Let me take a look.” Heat shimmered in the air between them as Lucien knelt in between her legs and leaned closer.

“If you want to give him a bite, you have my permission,” Elain added. As cute as it was, hedgehogs were still wild animals. And she didn’t know if they were aggressive when threatened. 

“I don’t have a problem with biting.” Elain’s blood ran hot when Lucien looked up at her with a humorous glint in both eyes. She quickly looked away. How can I be thinking improper thoughts about him when this poor hedgehog is practically dying in my lap?

Golden light shimmered as the cuts on the hedgehog’s soft belly melded together and disappeared. Elain sucked a breath in, fascinated. But the happy moment was short-lived. 

Lucien’s fingers gently probed the crooked foot, eliciting a plaintive screech from the hedgehog. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.” Regret laced in his russet eye. 

Elain felt like crying herself at the hedgehog’s distress. “Oh, Lucien. Please hurry! It seems to be in so much pain!” 

His face was grim. “I need to make sure it’s set in the proper position before I heal it. But it’s going to hurt her,” he explained. 

Elain hoisted the hedgehog up so that it leaned against her chest, praying her heartbeat would calm it down. “He’s trying to help you,” she whispered to it. “Please hold on just a little longer. Everything will be alright.” 

“It’s going to be alright, munchkin,” Lucien’s low voice soothed. He tilted his head left and right, as if assessing the proper positioning for a hedgehog foot. “You’ve been such a brave girl. Are you going to be the bravest little hedgehog in Velaris?” 

Golden webbing—a spell���was woven along the hedgehog’s ankle, bracing it in the proper position. The hedgehog screeched. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Lucien murmured. 

“Oh, when this is over, I’ll build you a little hedgehog house,” Elain added, trying to keep the hedgehog’s attention on her face. “I’ll make sure you have plenty of treats. We can invite some hedgehog friends over, alright? Don’t think about your foot, darling.” 

A flash of light burst from Lucien’s hand and a final terrified squeak pierced the air. The hedgehog writhed in agony briefly, shivering and whimpering. “Oh gods, oh gods,” Elain gasped. “Is it alright? What happened?” 

“I think so. Put it on the table and see,” Lucien said gently. The hedgehog was indeed back to normal, ambling around on all four legs and making snuffling sounds. 

“It worked. It really worked!” Elain smiled broadly, her heart swelling with relief and joy. “Thank you for helping, Lucien.” Before she could stop herself, she wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug. Realizing what she’d done, Elain disentangled herself from him sheepishly. 

Lucien shrugged as he stood up. “Couldn’t have done it without you.” He paused. “Did you really mean it? Everything you said to the hedgehog? About building a whole house and bringing more of its kind over?” 

“Yes?” Her mate appraised her with a small smile on his lips that stripped Elain bare. Did he think she was being childish? “And what about it?” Elain demanded hotly. 

“It’s refreshing.” Lucien glanced over his shoulder on the way out of the greenhouse. “The way you care for a small hedgehog, when you treated it gently…it gives me hope for this world.” 

You too, Elain wanted to say. But her mate had already winnowed away without saying goodbye. Meanwhile, the hedgehog was sniffling at a gold-embossed envelope on the worktable. The invitation to Queen Vassa’s coronation had indeed been delivered.

[vanseerra]

Home - An Elucien One-Shot

The Winter Solstice should be a time for joy and celebrations, so why is Elain awake so late and why does the house feel so dark and cold? Lucien should not be awake either, and yet, there is something in his chest compelling him to listen and follow to its cause.

G Rating | 3.5k Words

Elain

The evening was finally winding down. A still air has crept over the townhouse, bringing with it the deep chill of the winter night. Gone were the comforting thrills of a room full of laughter and excitement from only hours before. The winter solstice was always a big event here. With the festivities as well as Feyre’s birthday, everyone could be assured a day filled with joy. Nyx’s arrival had added an extra layer of warmth- watching his bright eyes light at the sight of every new toy and gift didn’t fail to spread smiles across everyone’s faces.

Seeing her sisters, Nesta especially, leaning into the celebrations and letting go of that past that seemed oh so close was a sense of peace for Elain. A bud of light was ripe in her chest as she played her role as a quiet and respectful observer with pride. It was in those moments that the newly turned fae believed she could adjust to this life, where she could hope for the ease that her family bore these days. That optimism clung to her with desperation but as the night inevitably drew nearer, when the sun began to descend behind its sunken veil, she fell with it.

The fire before her hummed with life. With drifting eyes, she stared into the flames. They bounced and danced around each other, their flicks of yellows darting skywards. To watch so closely caused her lids to sting but there was little she could do to look away. How could she deny this final chance of warmth? How could she turn from this tiny kindle of comfort while her siblings lay sleeping, huddled against their partners, their families.

With a sorrowful dip, the well in her chest widened, its darkness wrapping her ribs with weights. It was not an unusual feeling to her now and had stopped being a stranger to her a long time ago- before this house, this place, these lands. She wondered when they had become so acquainted but to bring up these memories now… she could not bear it.

Elain sighed, deeply and purposefully, arms curling around her knees on the sofa as she held the flames gaze. In her transfixed state, she did not hear the small creak of the oak door, nor heard the two hesitant footsteps that entered the main sitting room. The visitor paused, seemingly awaiting a moment to speak when she groaned loudly in pure frustration, flailing her head backwards. Deep golden eyes met her upside ones. With a gasp, she straightened her body back up.

“Gosh Lucien, don’t you know how to knock?” She exclaimed, a small pink tinting her cheeks.

“…To enter the living room?”

Elain was stunted. Truly, she hasn’t known why his sudden appearance had shaken her so visciously. She turned her body to face him, noting instantly the casualness of his attire: the way his linen shirt hung from his body, showing the slightest hint of muscle and the loose red braid that hung over his shoulder. She swallowed. No words could rise to her lips.

“I…”

“It’s late, I’m surprised to see you up.” Lucien's voice was crisp, warm and smooth, a delicate ember. His brows were knitted together in concern, the gentle pupils of his eyes examining her carefully as she sat before him. “Is something wrong?”

“I was just about to retire.” She answered simply.

It wasn’t a lie per-say, more of a non-truth. How could she explain what had been going through her mind moments before? Would she even want to? Seeing Lucien before her like this though, without all of the awkward formalities she swore to upkeep around her family and friends, was new but not unwelcome. She wondered what was going through his mind.

“May I sit for a moment?” He gestured to the couch she was perched upon. “I couldn’t sleep.” He grimaced.

She gave a gentle nod. He made his way over and slowly sat himself beside her, their bodies angled slightly away from each other. Her heart lurched in her chest. Had she ever been this close to him before? She’d certainly never picked up on his scent, the woody depth of cedarwood mixed in with something of slight sweetness. Cinnamon. Her instincts cried to her, begging for her to indulge, to sweep her arms around him and breathe in that cosy warmth. She dug her nails into her legs.

Lucien

Lucien's day had never really ended. He’d excused himself from the festivities relatively early, hoping to get a long rest before his return the following day. However, tucked up in the sheets of the guest room, his mind turned and turned. A pressure sat on his chest, similar to the shame he held some days but was somehow different.

The feeling was an ache. It dug deep into his chest and seemed to pull at his lungs, at his heart, searching for a response. It was a hollowed darkness. The weight called to him, echoed a sense of loneliness, of emptiness, of pain. A pang of recognition hit him suddenly, causing him to bolt upright. The pain was not his.

He had found her huddled on a couch before the fireplace. Even with her body turned from him, his breath paused at her beauty. The dim light of the lit fire flowed around her, illuminating the delicate outline of her pink dress. Sat there like that, she looked like a goddess. It wasn’t uncommon for him to be struck by her presence- sometimes just being in the same room as her would render him frozen. Never before though had he witnessed this side of her, performing no acts of properness, no walls guarding her. A need to protect her rung through his bones.

Beside her, he carefully examined the delicacies of her face. The softness of her features, the light rosiness that brushed her cheeks, the subtle curve of her long lashes. Breathtaking yet… her eyes ached, her jaw tightened, her brows twitched. It was clear how many words were turning in her head, how many thoughts she wanted to spill and clear from her.

“You can talk to me, you know…” His invitation was weak and he silently cursed himself for it. “I’m good at keeping secrets.”

His attempt at humour had not struck true. Elains brows further burrowed, a finger gently rubbing her knee. Self-soothing.

“I barely know you.” Her voice was but a whisper.

He supposed she was right. The two of them were barely more than strangers. For a couple of years now, he had done all he could to respect her and her boundaries. He kept his visits brief, words short, only coming and going when he was needed. There was nothing that caused him greater pain, but he had done it and done it well. The fact that the two of them were talking, albeit awkwardly and with tension, was more than could be said about the last few years. He was eternally grateful regardless.

“You could know me.” His offer was bold yet sincere. Gently, his heart thumped behind his ribs and he knew she could hear it. Elain turned to face him and he almost cried. The softness of her brown hair fell over her shoulder as she moved her head. It was angelic. He watched with eagerness as her eyes flickered through many thoughts and he silently prayed for an invitation. Please his mind willed. Her eyes turned back to the flames as she spoke.

“This house is so quiet at night…” She started.

“When the sun sets its like… it becomes a new place. The silence is so loud, it’s weird. With so many people here you’d never think it could be like this. To be awake at this time of night it…”

Hesitantly, she held a hand before the flame, letting it heat her palm. He noted the soft curves of her nails, the blushed skin of her fingers, and wondered how it would feel on his own.

“I know I should be grateful. Feyre has been so good to me, too good to me. She’s done everything she can to help me adjust, despite everything. But still…”

A small tear bubbled at the corner of her eye and he could not resist the hand that leaned to wipe it. She did not resist.

Elain

She was speaking before she could even comprehend what was happening. Somehow and for some reason, the words fell from her with ease, her heart opening in a way it hadn’t for so long. Perhaps it was because he was an outsider? Not a part of Rhys and his Inner Circle who had tried so insistently to ease her into their group. No it wasn’t that, it was… When she turned to look at him, she saw herself in the reflection of those gentle eyes and wanted to weep instantly. His gaze held such care, a sense of longing bubbling beneath its surface.

The matter of the mating bond had been so tricky for her for so long, and for good reason. Everything had been taken from her against her will and she was expected to just accept it? After everything she had lost? After every sacrifice she had made? Here was a man, handed to her and expected to be a companion to her. How could she ever be okay with that?

Lucien was not the fae she thought he would be, however. The fact she had little to do with him was proof of that. Where she had expected him to be forthcoming and insistent on their bond, he has been the opposite- out of the picture and respectfully so. Their distance had been a physical strain, one she knew to be purely biological but he had listened and demanded nothing from her.

Gazing at him now, she could see him for who he was. Feyre’s friend. Loyal, caring, dependable. Before her like this, he asked nothing of her, only offered an open ear, one she needed so desperately. Maybe it was because of that, because of his quiet acceptance and patience that she continued speaking, honestly and with a heavy heart.

“This isn’t my home. I don’t know if it can ever be. I don’t even think I know what the word means anymore.” Gods did that truth ache.

A flash of understanding passed through Lucien's expression and he appeared to think over his response for a second before speaking.

“What do you want home to mean?”

Elain was struck. What did she want home to mean? The heaviness of the question was unexpected and yet, it pulled on a cord so deep she couldn’t help but tug, searching for her answer. Home. Home should mean a place, should mean family, friends. The words that came up surprised her.

“Warmth.”

Now that she thought about it, when was the last time she had felt it authentically? Sitting here, before this fire, was different. Her chest didn’t hold the heat like it used to, surrounded by her two sisters and her Father, back before everything here. That was a past she could never return, no matter how much it ached; perhaps that’s why it had all been… so hard.

Lucien

Lucien held his breath as she spoke, every word quaint yet charged, filled with feelings so deeply personal he wondered why he had been privy to hear them. Not that he was complaining about it. The truth of it was, everything she was saying resonated so strongly with his own beliefs- the conflicts he had faced and continued to each day.

He should be satisfied with his life. He was safe, protected, surrounded by people who accepted him for who he was and yet… There was always that final piece missing, that yearning he felt to live rather than just exist. As a little boy, he had felt that same gap, even more so in his family home. His brothers were in name only, the weight of his outcast nature isolating him from the warmth he saw between his Father and siblings. Why was he so different? Why did they not love him in the same way? These questions had plagued him for a lifetime.

Feyre had been good to him also. His role in the Night Court was not something he turned his nose up at. It was a stable job that allowed him to do what he did best. He also took deep joy in celebrating with them all over the holidays, laughing alongside new friends and old but, it was never the sense of completeness that he was constantly longing for.

Warmth. There was a great irony in how deeply he related to her truth. Lucien was warmth personified. His upbringing had been surrounded by ‘warmth’ in the Autumn Court and yet, it was more like fire- something that burnt and stung those that fell victim to it. He supposed ‘warmth’ was nothing like that at all. His powers were different, they were innately him, his nature. At times, he felt shame at his abilities: they reflected his heritage in ways he never wanted to be entangled with. But, at its core, there was no element he knew better.

He could provide Elain with what she wanted. He could warm her with his powers, with his words, with his affection. What a painful thing it was to be on the brink of something so great and to withhold it like a forbidden truth. Clenching his teeth to stop the words from dropping from his throat, he watched her carefully. What would Elain want to hear right now?

“I think that’s beautiful…” He started, watching Elains interest slip with slow disappointment. She faced the dwindling flame, her head resting upon her knees.

“Yes…”

It struck him. She did not need to hear approving words, didn’t need someone to be agreeable and offer her no solutions. She had probably had a lifetime of it. He straightened his back, glancing to the ceiling as he recalled a memory.

“When I was a boy, we had this massive oak tree in our back garden.” He started and noted her eyes sliding to watch him.

“Its leaves were every hue of orange and red you could imagine. And its canopy looked like the tip of a mushroom. When I’d hold my hand up towards the sky…” he demonstrated for her, raising her palm upwards as he spoke.

“It wouldn’t even cover half of it- it was that large. It was my favourite tree by far, so grand and majestic and I would spend hours and hours in its shade.”

“What would you do beneath it?” She asked inquisitively.

“Oh, everything. Some days I would draw, read, sometimes even sleep under its cover. The best day I had was when I owned this little paper sword. I would swing it back and forth around it, pretending to fend off monsters from its trunk.” He scoffed at the memory, shaking his head.

“Did they win?”

“Did they win!” He chuckled, eyebrow raising at her sly sense of humour. “Now that is just cruel Elain. I think even I could fend off pretend monsters.”

The small painted smile on her face was all he could ever wish for.

“Anyhow, the tree was planted beside a big window into our home. It was always wide open to allow in the breeze and so, when I was beneath it, I could often… hear the comings and goings of the house.” His grin slipped.

“It was from that place, resting against that great oak that I overheard many things. Hushed talks of diplomacies, debates and arguments, dinner conversation and most poignantly…. celebrations.”

Elains brows sunk at this revelation, the confusion and hurt on her face evident. She went to speak but he continued.

“I was never not invited to those moments but… to say that things were different when I was around would be an understatement. I was just a kid and still, my family, my brothers especially resented me so strongly. It made me so confused.” The tears were caught at the back of his throat and he fought his resolve, trying to keep them from falling. He could not look towards her, in fear of his restraint slipping and the pain becoming too evident.

Elain

Elain could not believe what she was hearing. To know Lucien had suffered so much in his earlier life, had been so alone… her heart sunk for all that he had endured at such a young age. Her own life had not been so perfect as a child, but to be so isolated, in a family that large, she could not imagine the toll it would’ve taken. It was clear from the pained expression that overtook his features just how low the memory was.

A part of her had been relieved when he’d first started the story, grateful that he wasn’t just going to nod and move on from the openness of her confession. Gods knew she was sick to death of being coddled and agreed to. “Yes Elain.” “That sounds nice Elain” “What a good idea Elain”- she was sick of it. However, this was a different type of pain, one she felt within her own bones and chest. She could not help the hand that reached over to grasp his, tentatively and sheepishly.

His eyes were instantly upon hers, his body going deathly still. He did not move away however, only considered her in his gaze. A grateful smile tugged on his lips and it was so bright and warm that Elain was equally as frozen. How could such a small movement have such an effect on her?

“That means to say…” he carried on, “that on some levels and in some ways, I believe I understand. To be without warmth in your home, that is a scar that does not so easily heal and admittedly, makes it hard to find the right, true step forwards.”

“Yes.” Her reply was a little breathless, hardly believing someone else understood it as she did. The words were direct echoes of her own thoughts.

“Where do you go when you don’t know where to look or what to do?” It was a question she aimed less at him and more at herself. A question she had spent the last few years turning and turning in her mind.

“I’ll admit, I don’t have the answer for myself but I think you have to start somewhere.” He gestured to the room before them with his spare hand, signalling to the space.

“If this isn’t making you happy then, despite what feels right, what feels like the acceptable thing to do” he clarified, “then you should explore the alternatives. This world is a lot bigger than the Night Court, regardless of what your sister and the others like to believe.”

“I can’t just… up and leave.” There was a deep sadness to her tone.

“Says who?“

“Says… everyone. I think Nesta would have a heart attack.”

“This is your life Elain, not hers.”

“Then how do you suggest I go… where do I even start?”

Lucien

Lucien was determined. Elains true thoughts and feelings had been blown open wide to him and the doubt that plagued her so closely was fuelled by so many things that he knew to be untrue. She was not stuck here in the Night Court. Not on the level she thought to be. There would be some resistance from others, of course, but when wasn’t there in life? And if it was making her so unwell to be in this place…

A thought hit him. It was wild and childish and completely nonsensical, especially considering this was the most the both of them had spoken in all of those years but, when if not now would be the perfect chance to try? With a newfound determination, the red haired fae placed his free hand upon their joined ones, leaning towards her slightly.

“Come with me.”

“Lucien…”

“Not for long, for a single trip if that’s what you wish. I’m leaving in the morning for another court, relaying some messages and that is all. I could have you back here within the day.”

A small ember of light shone behind the woman’s pupils, it was hopeful and sparked with a sense of hope that he had not seen from her before. It was a stunning sight.

“But Feyre… Nesta…”

“Will be fine. I will even get on my knees and beg before Rhysand if you’ll accept.”

She scoffed, rolling her eyes at his playful nature but the small tug on her lips told him what she would say before she spoke.

“Fine.”

“Fine?” He had to be sure.

“Yes. Yes I will go with you. One trip.” She emphasised, holding her finger up with importance.

“You’d better pack your bags then, lady.”

Lucien grinned, ear to ear, the song in his chest ringing and ringing and ringing.

A/N: I wanted to say thank you for my support on my other fics and to ask for your patience while I figure out Tumblrs formatting- things like this really make me feel my age haha. AO3 will be my next big hurdle. Elucien is a ship I hold so dear and getting to write for them brings me a lot of joy. In the future, I hope to continue pre-existing fics and perhaps open to suggestions for one-shots! All the best :)

[c-e-d-dreamer]

I Was Enchanted To Meet You: Part One

A/N: Happy @elucienweekofficial lovelies! I'm super excited to share this fic with you all! I'll be posting a new part every day for the remainder of Elucien Week! Now, when I last watched Disney's Enchanted, it was so clear that Elain IS Giselle and Lucien IS Robert (and Cassian is absolutely the himbo prince and Nesta is Idina Menzel), and nothing says Magic, today's prompt, like that movie, right? So, hopefully, everyone agrees and everyone enjoys :)

Read on AO3 // Chapter Masterlist // Next Part

Elain

The music is light and melodic as it floats around her. It twists around her limbs like a warm, summer’s breeze, like sunlight, filling her chest with a blooming warmth that digs its roots deep between her ribs. Elain follows the steps with ease, gliding across the floor and twirling around with each swell of the song.

But it’s the hand at the small of her back, the other one that’s equally warm and steady clasped with her own, that truly draws Elain’s attention. There’s something so familiar yet unfamiliar in the feel of them against her body, in the way they curl around her fingers. Something that settles deep in her veins, that leaves her feeling safe, that has her feeling like home.

She twirls around again, and a face comes swimming into view, and those eyes…

Elain wakes with a quiet gasp, her eyes snapping open. She blinks a few times, her heart still fluttering away in her chest, before her surroundings come back into focus. Sunlight spills in through the open windows and into her cottage, long golden streaks bouncing off the wood, leaving shimmering spotlights across the blankets on her bed. Just outside she can hear the sweet songs of the birds of the forest, ready to start their morning.

“Elain?”

Elain glances to her right and smiles when she finds that Pip has climbed up onto her bed. The chipmunk tilts his head in concern, wide eyes blinking up at her.

“Oh, Pip,” Elain sighs longingly, holding her hands to her chest like she can still feel those hands curled around her fingers. “I had the most wondrous dream. There was a prince and we were dancing to a beautiful melody.”

“A prince?” Pip asks, hopping across the mattress to follow Elain when she gets up from the bed.

“Yes, and he had these eyes…” Elain’s steps pause in the middle of the room, that final image of her dream flashing across her mind like a swirling mist she can’t quite grasp onto. “He was my true love. I’m sure of it.”

“Well, we’ll just have to find him then. What did he look like?”

Elain hums consideringly, settling her hands on her hips. She tries to think how best to describe her prince, how to paint a perfect picture of everything that he was, but her mind keeps coming up blank. There simply aren’t the right words when it comes to that face, to that feeling that had washed over her so surely and taken up roots between her ribs even still now that she’s awake. He was everything, but that doesn’t really help or answer Pip’s question. But then an idea strikes her.

“We’re going to need some help,” Elain declares, striding over to the window of her cottage.

Cupping her hand to her mouth, Elain leans out the window and sings a tune, the forest around her quick to answer the melody back to her. She steps back just as her forest friends begin to crowd around the cottage and to clamber in through the window. Rabbits and squirrels and deer and bluebirds and foxes all flood into the space, peering up at her with wide eyes and wide smiles, clearly all happy to see her and excited to help. It has light warmth swelling and pitter pattering away between her ribs, so lucky to have so many forest friends.

“Oh, I’m so glad that you all can help,” Elain tells the animals gathered, making sure to smile at each and every one. “We’ll need to gather all the supplies we can to help recreate my true love.”

“Alright alright,” Pip claps his paws together, having climbed up onto Elain’s table. “Let’s get to work, people! We need to build this true love while it’s still ingrained in her subcranium.”

Pip continues to clap his paws together to get everyone moving, but it works, all of Elain’s forest friends jumping into action. The bluebirds fly to grab the fabric near Elain’s spinning wheel while the rabbits push over her dress form. Elain takes the fabric with a quiet thanks, draping it across the shoulders of the dress form like a jacket. She stands back to admire her work and adjusts the fabric until it’s to her liking, but then a nudge against her hand draws her attention. She glances down to find her deer friends, each with a bundle of white wildflowers in their mouth.

“Thank you so much,” Elain tells them, taking the wildflowers and arranging them so they act as trimming along the makeshift jacket she’s created for her prince.

“How’s this, Elain?” the owl asks, place long, autumn leaves on the head of the dress form so they drape like hair along the shoulders.

Elain smiles widely as she admires the color, almost a perfect match for the shade she remembers from her dream. “Just perfect.”

“And these for the eyes?” one of the rabbits questions, holding up two acorns.

Elain gasps quietly, plucking both the acorns from the rabbit’s paws and holding them up. “How did you know? The color practically burns just like his.” She settles the acorns securely in the makeshift face she’s created atop the dress form, stepping back once more and letting out a happy sigh. “There. He’s perfect.”

“Is he finished?” Pip asks. “Let's see this prince then.”

“Now presenting… my one true love,” Elain announces, turning the dress form around so all her forest friends can see. All the animals gathered ooo and ah, and Elain’s smile grows at their reaction. She turns her own attention back to the recreation of her prince, but then her eyes widen and she frowns. “Oh, no. I forgot to give him lips.”

One of the deer tilts its head confusedly. “Does he have to have lips?”

“Of course he does. How else are we meant to share true love’s kiss?” Elain explains gently before spinning back toward her recreated prince and curling her arms around the dress form. “I’ve been dreaming of a true love’s kiss and a prince I’m hoping comes with this. That's what brings ever-aftering so happy.” She twirls around with her prince, a mirror to the way they had danced in her dream, as she continues to sing, “and that's the reason we need lips so much, for lips are the only things that touch. So, to spend a life of endless—”

Elain’s singing stutters to an abruptive stop when she realizes that none of her forest friends are even looking at her anymore. Instead, each of her friends’ gaze is all but glued toward the window of her cottage, each pair of eyes wide and fearful. Some of the rabbits are even pointing frantically behind Elain, toward that very same window.

It has all of the hairs on the back of Elain’s neck standing up, trepidation flooding through her veins like ice water. Swallowing hard, Elain turns around slowly, coming face to face with what appears to be a giant eyeball.

“I’ve been dreaming of a true love’s kiss,” a deep voice rumbles, Elain’s entire cottage seeming to shake with the reverberations.

A troll.

There’s a troll outside of Elain’s cottage and peering in at her. Her heart pounds away even as it lodges itself firmly in her throat. All of her forest friends quickly flee, and Elain frantically turns in place, trying desperately to decide the best way for her to escape. The loud, crashing sound of splintering wood echoes around her and is her only warning before the large, green hand of the troll breaks through the window and wall of her cottage and reaches inside. Elain just barely dances out of the reach of those grasping fingers and runs for the door, clambering out of her cottage and up the tree it’s built into.

She climbs higher and higher amongst the branches, but one glance over her shoulder and she finds the troll following just behind her. She quickens her pace, racing onto another branch, but as she gets closer to the end, she realizes she has nowhere left to go, even worse when the troll climbs onto the very same branch and the combined weight sends the branch dipping dangerously.

That green hand reaches for her again, and Elain lets out an alarmed cry and squeezes her eyes shut, accepting her fate and waiting for those fingers to curl around her, but it never comes. Confused, Elain slowly opens her eyes again and peers over her shoulder. The troll is still there, his hand still half outstretched toward her, but there’s a sword now lodged into the wood of the branch, pinning the troll’s hand in place.

“Fear not, fair maiden,” a voice comes from below. “I have come to rescue you.”

Elain looks toward the ground and finds a prince astride a horse. Her prince. He’s come to rescue her. Elain’s heart flutters, and she tries to offer her prince a smile in thanks, but the branch beneath her gives a terrifying groan, still unsteady beneath the weight of her and the troll. She’s not sure how much longer it will hold them, so with a yelp, Elain jumps for the closest branch of the next tree. Her fingers just barely close around the bark, and relief washes over Elain as the loss of her weight sends the troll flying through the sky in the opposite direction.

The relief is short-lived, though, as Elain’s grip on the tree branch starts to slip. She tries to curl her fingers tighter, tries to pull herself up and more firmly onto the branch, but it seems to be futile.

“Pip,” Elain calls out desperately.

“Don’t worry, honey. I’ve got you,” Pip tells her, hopping over to the branch and grabbing at Elain’s fingers with his hands.

But it’s not enough. Despite Pip’s and her own best effort, Elain’s fingers finally slip. She lets out a scream as she goes hurtling toward the ground, her whole body tensing up in anticipation, in fear. And yet, the ground never comes up to meet her. Instead, it’s strong arms that wrap around Elain’s body, holding her secure, holding her safe.

Elain blinks her eyes open in surprise and is greeted by bright, hazel eyes peering down at her. Soft, dark curls fall along the prince’s temples and cheeks to his shoulders, and when their gazes meet, a wide smile pulls its way across the prince’s face until a dimple pops in his left cheek, almost a mirror to the scar running through his right eyebrow.

“Are you alright, fair maiden?” the prince asks.

“I am now,” Elain assures him, tucking a strand of hair back behind her ear. “And please. Call me Elain.”

“Oh, Elain. We shall be married in the morning,” the prince declares, taking both her hands in his. “You’re the fairest maid I’ve ever met. You were made…”

“To finish your duet.”

~ * * * ~

Prince Cassian was right. They were to be married in the morning, which is how Elain finds herself clambering out of a carriage in front of the Andalasia castle. She barely has time to admire the gorgeous white stone, the vines and flowers curling up and around the turrets, the bright blue waterfall that sends water cascading down the side of one of the walls. Instead, Elain hurriedly smoothes out the white fabric of her dress, rushing up the front steps of the castle.

“Wait up, Elain,” Pip cries out behind her. “We’re not finished with you yet.”

But Elain doesn’t have time. She’s already running terribly late, and she can’t leave Prince Cassian waiting a moment longer. She doesn’t want to wait another moment either. She’s to marry her true love today. A moment she’s been dreaming about for forever. Two of her bluebird friends fly over her, gently placing a tiara into her hair as she continues to hurry forward.

“Oh, thank you so much,” Elain tells them, pushing open the large double doors that lead into the castle.

Elain is just crossing over the bridge, the church in sight just ahead, when an old woman pops up in front of her. Elain lets out a soft cry of surprise, nearing tumbling backwards as her steps stutter to such an abrupt stop. The woman smiles up at Elain, the gesture showing off her crooked teeth, and Elain can see strands of gray hair tucked beneath the hood of the cloak the woman is wearing.

“What a pretty bride,” the woman says, her dark eyes dancing over Elain’s dress.

“That’s very kind of you,” Elain tells her, trying to side step around the woman. “But I really must—”

“No, wait!” the woman exclaims, grabbing onto Elain’s wrist. “I have a wedding gift for you, my dear.”

Elain tries to pull her arm free, tries to find the right words to say to politely explain that she simply does not have time, but it doesn’t seem to deter the old woman. She continues to lead Elain further away, and Elain can do nothing but stare forlornly at the church, at her prince waiting for her there.

“It’s a wishing well,” the old woman explains, leading Elain to a waterfall of glittering water.

“But I’m going to be late,” Elain tries to offer again. “And all my wishes are already coming true.”

“But a wish on your wedding day is the most magical of all,” the old woman argues, continuing to tug at Elain until they’re standing right in front of that sparkling water. “Just close your eyes and make a wish.”

Elain hesitates for a moment, once again glancing over her shoulder and toward the church, but the old woman’s hand curls around her shoulder, nudging her attention back to the wishing well. She supposes there really is no harm in making a wish, and as the woman said, it would be especially magical to make one on her wedding day. This way she could ensure she and Prince Cassian really do have everything they both want. That they really do live happily ever after. So, with a soft sigh, Elain closes her eyes and clasps her hands together. She allows all her warmth, all her happiness and love and positive thoughts to bloom deep in her chest. Allows that feeling to bleed into her veins and flood all the way down to her toes. Allows that feeling to fill her mind with every dream she’s ever had of true love and happily ever after.

“I wish…”

But before Elain can finish speaking, she falls forward, tumbling down and down into the darkness below.

~ * * * ~

Lucien

“You never cared about Gordie the way I do!”

Lucien sighs softly, rubbing his fingers against his temples and the throbbing that’s begun to take up home there. It has him starting to wonder if he should have ever taken this case in the first place. He had sworn to Eris that he could handle it, that it would be a walk in the park. And now they're arguing over hockey trading cards. Already, he can imagine how his brother must be laughing at him.

“Mr. Vanserra?” Lucien looks up at the sound of his name, finding Vassa sticking her head through the door, the redhead offering him a sympathetic smile when their gazes meet. “It’s time.”

With a nod, Lucien turns back to the other lawyer sitting across from him, raising his voice so he can be heard over the still arguing couple. “I have to go pick up my daughter. Continue at nine tomorrow morning?”

Once the other lawyer agrees, Lucien gathers up his papers and files, shoving them all into his portfolio and standing up from the table. He meets Vassa at the door, and she hands over his work briefcase, both of them rushing toward the front doors of the office.

“I can’t believe after all that you still want to get married,” Vassa comments, her eyes flickering back toward the door and the voices still carrying from within the room.

“It’s different with me and Nesta,” Lucien tells her, taking his jacket next and tugging it on. “We understand each other’s strengths and weaknesses. We know we’re building something strong.”

Vassa snorts amusedly. “Are you proposing marriage or a business deal?”

“Yeah, sure. Laugh it up,” Lucien remarks dryly with a roll of his eyes. “But when our marriage is a success because there's no unrealistic expectations, you'll be jealous.”

“You’re just such a romantic,” Vassa quips back sarcastically as Lucien pushes through the glass doors that lead to and from the firm.

“Of course I am.”

~ * * * ~

Thankfully, Willow isn’t the last child still in the aftercare program when Lucien arrives at the school. She smiles widely when she spots him walking through the doors, quickly grabbing her backpack while he signs her out. He hears the jingle of the keychains she keeps on her backpack before a weight crashes into his legs, little hands curling around his knees, and Lucien has to bite back his own smile.

“Daddy. Daddy. Look what I drew today,” Willow tells him excitedly, and Lucien looks down to see her holding up a picture of her in a bright pink princess dress.

“That’s beautiful, but it’s been raining outside, so let’s put this away for now until we get home, okay?”

Willow nods her head and spins around, so Lucien plucks the paper from between her fingers, kneeling down so he can unzip her backpack and tuck the drawing inside. She grabs his hand in hers when he’s finished, and then they’re heading out of the school and toward his car. He helps buckle Willow into her seat before sliding into the driver’s seat, following the familiar roads that will lead them back home.

“So, other than your princess drawing, how was school today?” Lucien asks, glancing back toward Willow in the rearview mirror.

“It was good,” Willow tells him, her eyes glued out the window and the buildings passing them by.

“Tomorrow, Nesta is going to pick you up and take you to school, okay? The two of you can have some grown up girl bonding time.”

Willow frowns at that, tilting her head in an adorable show of confusion. “But I’m only six.”

“I know, but…” Lucien pauses, taking a moment to swallow hard and tighten his grip on the steering wheel. He still hasn't quite figured out the perfect way to tell her yet, the timing never quite right, but now he's running out of time. Perhaps a band-aid approach is the way to go. “But I’m going to ask Nesta to marry me.”

“What?” Willow asks, her voice filled with shock.

“You like her, don’t you?” Lucien continues, pulling the car to a stop at a redlight and keeping his attention on Willow’s reflection in the rearview mirror. “We all get along, and I—”

“Daddy, look! There’s a princess!”

Lucien frowns at being cut off so abruptly, but he turns his head out the window to see what snagged Willow’s attention. He spots a billboard all lit up with a castle on it, big block letters promoting the local casino. And standing in front of the castle is some sort of animatronic princess in a large, puffy, white dress.

“It’s a real princess,” Willow continues excitedly, and before Lucien can correct her, she’s unbuckling herself and flinging the car door open to clamber right out into the street.

“Willow!” Lucien exclaims, throwing the car into park and wrenching his own door open to chase her down. He catches her around the shoulders, pulling her back against him and to a stop. “Don’t ever do that again.”

“But Daddy look,” Willow argues, pointing up toward the billboard.

With a barely contained sigh, Lucien looks back up toward the billboard, but he has to blink a few times to make sure his eyes aren’t deceiving him. Because there’s simply no way. It’s no animatronic on that billboard, but an actual woman. Her honeyed curls are wet from the rain where they’re piled atop her head in some sort of elaborate updo, and the large hoop skirt of her dress seems to sway with her movements.

“Hello?” the woman’s voice floats down to him. “Won’t you please let me in. Do you know Cassian?”

“Hey, miss,” Lucien shouts up to her. “Are you alright?”

At the sound of his voice, the woman turns around. “Oh, hello, I was just wondering if—”

Before the woman can finish speaking, she loses her footing, wobbling dangerously on the small platform in front of the billboard. In an instant, Lucien rushes forward, holding his arms out like that’s somehow going to help. The woman continues to teeter, the weight of her hoop skirt clearly not helping, before she goes tumbling over the edge with a shout. Lucien’s heart lurches suddenly at the sight of her falling, but luckily, the woman’s hands grab onto the edge.

“Just hang on,” Lucien calls out, eyes darting around for anything that might help.

He spots the ladder that leads up to the billboard, and his attention dances back to the woman, trying to gauge how much time he has to climb up and get to her, but the answer is clearly no time at all. Already, he can see the woman’s grip beginning to slip, the metal platform of the billboard slick from the rain. She’s going to go plummeting to the ground, and Lucien has seconds to try and figure out what he’s going to do.

“Catch her, Daddy!” Willow cries out from behind him, just as the woman finally loses her hold.

Lucien keeps his eyes pinned on the falling woman, rushing to make sure he’s standing just beneath her, his arms outstretched and ready. He gets a mouthful of white, frilly fabric, and then they’re both crashing into the ground. Lucien winces at the pain that flares across his arms, in his knees from where they collided with the pavement, and he splutters around the dress as he shifts until he can finally take in the woman’s face.

He’s greeted by warm, wide brown eyes blinking up at him. Those honeyed curls are a bit of a mess around her face, but her expression is still all soft, pretty angles, a dusting of freckles littered across the apples of her cheeks.

“Thank you,” the woman tells him, offering a kind smile.

“Yeah, sure,” Lucien dismisses with a shrug, clambering back to his feet and helping the woman to hers. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I’m fine.”

“Do you need me to call someone for you?”

The woman frowns in confusion at that, tilting her head and sending more hair cascading down her shoulder. “I don’t think they’d hear you from here.”

Lucien blinks a few times. “What?” Before he can finish with that line of questioning, a loud clap of thunder echoes overhead, promising another lashing of rain. “Listen… I’m sorry. What did you say your name was?”

“Elain.”

“Listen, Elain. We live just around the corner. You can come inside and dry off and then I can order you a car to take you wherever it is you’re trying to go, okay?”

“That’s so very kind of you. Thank you.”

With a nod, Lucien ushers both Elain and Willow back toward the car, making sure his daughter is buckled back in before returning to the driver’s seat. He takes a deep breath as he throws the car back into drive, daring to glance toward the backseat through the rearview mirror. He’s sure this is the craziest—definitely the stupidest—thing he’s ever done. It’s not like him to go around helping strangers, especially in the city, but there’s just something about this Elain. Something in those glittering brown eyes. He just hopes it's a decision he doesn't come to regret.

And besides, he’s only helping to call her a car anyways.

“And what is your name?” Elain asks, her attention entirely on Willow.

“Willow Vanserra. And Daddy’s name is Lucien. Are you a real princess?”

“Not yet, but I will be once I marry Prince Cassian. Today was actually meant to be our wedding day.”

Willow gasps at that, leaning in closer. “What happened?”

“Well, there was this old woman, and she brought me to a wishing well, and I must have looked too far because I fell and fell and then I ended up here.”

“Is that a habit of yours, then?” Lucien teases, pulling into their assigned spot in the parking garage of their building. “Falling off things?”

“Usually, someone catches me,” Elain informs her, her voice almost haughty, as she gets out of the car.

The change in tone takes Lucien by such surprise that he has to press his lips together firmly to bite back a smile. He goes around to the other side of the car, helping Willow out and taking her hand in his, leading all three of them inside and up to their floor.

“But it’s no matter,” Elain continues as they walk down the hallway of their floor. “Because I’m sure that Cassian is already looking for me to take me away from this awful land. And when he finds me, we will finally be wed and share in true love’s kiss.”

Lucien can’t stop the amused snort that tears free. “True love’s kiss?”

“It’s the most powerful thing in the world.”

“Sure it is,” Lucien mutters, unlocking their apartment door and ushering everyone inside. He walks over to their linen closet, grabbing a fresh towel and holding it out toward Elain. “You can dry off, and I’ll call you a car, okay?”

Elain takes the towel with a quiet thanks, using it to press the water from her hair, so Lucien heads for his office. He roots around the papers in his desk drawer until he finds the business card he’s looking for. Diggin his phone out of his pocket, he starts to type in the phone number.

“Daddy, she’s really sleepy,” Willow says, stepping into the doorway to his office.

“What…” Lucien starts before he glances over Willow’s shoulder, noticing Elain now asleep on their sofa. “Oh, no. Absolutely not.”

Lucien rushes past Willow and back into the living room of their apartment, his frustration beginning to flare at the sleeping woman in their home. This is clearly what he gets for trying to do the right thing, for trying to help.

“But Daddy, you can’t make her leave now. She’s a real princess,” Willow argues, hot on his heels.

“She’s not a real princess,” Lucien informs her, trying to keep his voice calm. “Now, will you please go get ready for bed while I handle this?”

Willow lets out a long, withering sigh, but she stomps off toward her bedroom. Lucien waits until the door clicks shut behind her before turning his attention back to Elain. He finishes dialing the car service and tucks the phone against his shoulder while it rings, reaching out with his hand to try and rouse Elain gently. But instead, Elain merely snuffles quietly and curls deeper into herself as she continues to sleep.

Lucien hates how much that small gesture tugs at his heart strings. He hates how much this woman he’s known less than an hour is already having such an effect on him. He hates how something about her seems to spark deep within his soul, urging him to protect, to help, like some long forgotten ancient beast finally waking from slumber.

With a quiet, resigned huff, Lucien ends the call on his phone and grabs a blanket instead, carefully draping it over Elain’s frame. One night can’t hurt, and in the morning, he’ll get her where she needs to go, and that will be that. That will be the end of whatever this is, and he'll send Elain on her way, never to be seen again. He’s sure of it.

—

Updated Taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added): @moodymelanist @nesquik-arccheron @sv0430 @talkfantasytome @bookstantrash @eirini-thaleia @ubigaia @fromthelibraryofemilyj @luivagr-blog​ @lifeisntafantasy @superspiritfestival @hiimheresworld @marigold-morelli @sweet-pea1 @emeriethevalkyriegirl​ @pyxxie @dustjacketmusings @hallway5 @dongjunma @glowing-stick-generation @melonsfantasyworld​ @isterofimias @goddess-aelin @melphss @theladystardust @a-trifling-matter @blueunoias​ @kookskoocie​​ @unlikelypersonalknight1 @blurredlamplight @hereforthenessian @skaixo @jmoonjones @burningsnowleopard @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk

[folklorianhaze]

Should I be extra bad and let you guys have a preview of my modern day elucien multichapter??? 😈

...

okay I need no convincing imma do it

(For context, Elain and Lucien have just had a messy almost-hookup after Elain, still grieving her breakup with Graysen from several months ago, got drunk at Feyre and Rhys’ wedding. This scene is the morning after, and the whole fic will be told with chapters that alternate between past and present, filling out the gaps in Elain and Lucien’s friendship to eventual developing feelings for each other, as we piece together how they got to this point and how they’ll move forward!)

OCTOBER

Listen. We should probably talk about last night.

Elain Archeron squinted through bleary, swollen eyes at the too-bright screen of her phone, staring directly at but somehow failing to comprehend the words occupying the little blue text bubble. Trying her level best to ignore the name attached to the top of the thread, reminding her against her will of the sender.

And then, beneath the first message, a follow-up that somehow felt even more humiliating than its predecessor:

I know you’re going through a lot right now — I don’t want to pressure you at all. But I don’t like the way we left things.

Somewhere beneath the dull pressure steadily building in her head, she managed to muster up enough shame that her face burned. The tone of the messages alone said enough about her behavior last night that she wanted nothing more than to chuck her phone out of her fifth-story apartment window (and then maybe back her car up over the wreckage just to be sure.) 

As polite and careful as his words were, it was all too obvious — he was worried about her. Did he pity her, perhaps, for the emotional wreck she’d been lately? She wasn’t sure which option made her feel worse.

Although Elain supposed she couldn’t entirely blame him for showing concern. Last night, she’d . . . she shook her head and grimaced, as if she could clear her mind of the foggy memories that still lingered. And each snippet she recalled proved all the more embarrassing. To say she hadn’t been herself would have been the understatement of the century. She hardly ever drank, let alone to that extent. She wasn’t entirely sure what had possessed her to behave in such a way — and in public! At her sister’s wedding!

Just perfect, Elain, she thought, the oily, queasy feeling returning to the pit of her stomach with a vengeance. I’m sure Feyre appreciated your hysterics so much on the happiest night of her life.

She’d be sure to call her sister later and apologize. Profusely. She couldn’t remember exactly if she’d made a huge scene in her drunken stupor, but she supposed it didn’t hurt to cover all her bases. But her damage control would have to wait for later, when the headache inevitably receded and she had to face the consequences of her actions in the harsh light of day. It was just as well — Feyre and Rhys were undoubtedly still traveling to their luxurious tropical honeymoon destination, and wouldn’t take kindly to any interruptions.

Not that she was entirely sure if she wanted to interrupt them later, either.

Elain let out a slow exhale, shifting in her soft bedsheets. She’d gotten accustomed to being in her apartment by herself lately, though lying in this bed alone still felt strangest of all. Sometimes in the middle of the night, she still found herself expecting to find Graysen’s sleeping form there, even though it had been months since they’d split. Months ago, and yet . . . here she was, acting like a reckless teenager. Acting messy. Her eyes began to sting, and she swallowed past a sudden tightness in her throat.

As she burrowed her face farther into the pillows, a thought occurred to her. How had she gotten home last night? Obviously, she’d been too drunk to drive herself, and she didn’t remember getting into Nesta’s car. Yet she’d woken up in her own bed, and vaguely remembered stumbling through the darkness of her bedroom and shucking off the dress she’d worn to Feyre’s wedding before plopping down onto the mattress. 

The briefest flash of a memory — the sleek leather interior of a car, the blur of the highway through the passenger window, warm strains of Billie Holliday floating from the radio — an all-too-familiar woodsy, earthy scent that had made her feel so at home, nearly lulled her to sleep — a golden-brown hand reaching across to hold hers, his thumb gently stroking her knuckles —

— and a voice that twisted something in her chest, that made her ache to remember it: It’s okay, you’re okay, Elain. It’s going to be alright.

[sad-scarred-sassy]

The tragedy of Spring - Chapter 7

Summary: Settling into the new Spring Court, Feyre has a conversation with the High Lord of Spring.

Notes: I couldn't stop writing this so here is an early update. I hope you enjoy the Elucien cameo on this one!

Tag list: @foxcort @viktoriaashleyyx @ninthcircleofprythian

Read on ao3👇 or keep reading below the cut

“Mama?” Nyx’s little voice sounded from her arms, he had finally calmed down and his soft call had brought her back from her thoughts.

“Look baby” She half-heartedly pointed at some deer grazing contentedly in the distance and Nyx giggled. He was in a far better mood than he had been when they had first arrived here, and she was glad. They were standing in a big room with a huge arched window in the new Spring Court manor, if you could call the intricate villa created out of stone, connected by bridges and tunnels a “manor”. If Feyre had the mental capacity to enjoy the view she would, much like she could see Nyx was enjoying it from the huge window that separated them from the luscious Spring forest in all its glory. She would have never imagined what the forest could look like without those horrible foreign creatures stalking the lands, she had never seen the Spring Court during actual peace until now.

For a moment Feyre did lose herself as she stared at the landscape, the multiple levels of buildings intertwined with nature, coexisting with the enormous trees, with the crystalline waterfalls that cut the land, wildflowers and tended gardens mixing with each other, all alive and thriving with so many faeries of all types, working, living, laughing together. It was the most wonderful thing she had ever seen.

Her brief trance was cut short when she heard Tamlin’s voice give some more orders to his people. Her eyes traveled to his broad back facing her.

“Please, have a room ready for our guest” Tamlin said finally and the fae with green scales nodded before taking one last look at Feyre and exciting the room. Only then Feyre noticed the furniture. It was a drawing room.

She braced herself, tightening her grip on Nyx’s body, bracing his weight on her hip. When Tamlin hesitated before looking back at her she felt a cold sensation run to her stomach. Why did she think this was a good idea?

“I’m sorry, Tamlin” She blurted out as he finally turned to her. He paused.

His emerald eyes studied her for a second and she stiffened her posture.

“I will leave as soon as possible, I-I shouldn’t have come here.” She continued, her voice was rough from crying so much but she couldn’t stop the words. “This place- This place is beautiful, wonderful. It was a mistake coming here” She repeated.

Tamlin frowned slightly, then he walked slowly towards her, his hair still tied in a knot, messy. His clothes were slightly dirty and wrinkled. He had been doing hard labor when she arrived, she now realized.

He stopped just in front of her and Nyx, her eyes didn’t leave his even though they were so intense she had the unbearable urge to look elsewhere. Her face flushed as she imagined what he must be thinking.

Her, coming here, with his enemy’s son in her arms, crying for help, barefoot and looking half crazed. She almost laughed bitterly at the image.

Tamlin shook his head slightly. “There’s nowhere else I would rather you be than here” He startled her by saying, almost as a whisper.

Before she could say a word his green eyes dropped towards Nyx’s big blue eyes staring right back at him. The toddler smiled a small toothed smile at him and Tamlin’s features softened inadvertently. He smiled back.

His gaze lifted back up to hers then, and she felt her heart pound in her chest for an unknown reason.

“He has your eyes” He only said.

Feyre let go of a strained sob-laugh.

Tamlin only stared at her some more, concern painted all over his face and she couldn’t hold his gaze anymore, it felt too raw, she felt too pathetic. She looked out the floor-to-ceiling window, trying to hold herself together.

“Feyre” He tried. “Tell me what happened” He urged a bit too softly. She hated it. Hated the care in his words. She deserved this, all of what was happening to her, how couldn’t he see it, how didn’t he agree?

“I won’t bother you for long” She said, still not meeting his piercing eyes. He sighed.

“Can you sit down for me, at least?” He pointed at the couches surrounding the fireplace with his thumb. She bit the inside of her cheek as she nodded.

Her bare feet paddled through the wooden floor before feeling the soft rug on her achy soles. She was so tired.

She sat down on the couch as he took the loveseat right next to it. Nyx was already yawning when she cradled him on her lap. She tucked his wings and pushed his black hair back from his soft forehead as he drifted to sleep.

“I’ve already sent reinforcements to guard the borders. You’re safe here” He said softly and she nodded, not meeting his eyes. She knew she should tell him, she owed it to him to be clear about the actual risks of giving her refuge. But the words felt so heavy on her mouth, so foreign and unreal.

“You don’t have to tell me everything,” He said. “Just… enough to be prepared. Does he know you’re here?”

She finally reunited their eyes and somehow it was even more unbearable. Shame and guilt and embarrassment flooded her veins when looking at him. She took a steading breath.

“I don’t know” She said. “I don’t think he knows where I am yet. But I think he will figure it out soon” She wet her dry lips before looking at him again. “Tamlin, it’s worse than I thought, I honestly don’t- I’m scared he will come and destroy-“

“Don’t worry about that”

“But it is very likely, I have his heir-“

“You have your son.” He said matter-of-factly and she swallowed hard. “Trespassing would be considered an act of war, and I don’t think he’s in the position to start one” He said calmly. “Either way, we are prepared.” He rubbed his hands on his pants. “You should rest, let me take you to your room” He stood up and she simply nodded, picking herself up along with her baby as she let him winnow her just to appear right in front of a wooden door.

He grabbed the knob, his body closer to hers than he had been since she arrived, she could feel the heat emanating from him, his manly scent invading her senses which she ignored. He paused.

“Feyre, what did he do?” He said so low she felt it coursing through her body. His green eyes were digging themselves into hers so deeply, she couldn’t help herself anymore, he was looking at her like he needed to know, and she needed to have the truth out of her system.

She took a calming breath before she spoke. “I found out he made me seal a deal with him Under The Mountain when I was drunk on faerie wine” She said with a small voice. Tamlin’s body tensed instantly, every cell listening carefully as she spoke. She gulped and took a breath, holding Nyx closer as her extremities trembled. “He created our mating bond with a bargain” She said, the words so cold and nauseating that bile rose up to her throat. Tamlin straightened at her words, face unreadable, eyes moving quickly as he took the information, face turning from lost to shocked to outraged.

His mouth opened and closed, grabbing the door handle so hard it was a surprise it hadn’t broken yet.

“H-how” He managed. “Hybern… the king should have broken it along with the other one” He blinked.

“I don’t know… I think he may have thought he was breaking both when we only knew about the first one… still I don’t know the ways he managed it and why exactly he did it, other than…” She trailed off as she looked down at her son sleeping beautifully in her arms. Tamlin’s eyes only widened. She could see the battle going on inside his head, he looked like he wanted to crush something, someone, but he surprised her when he took a steading breath and gulped his anger down.

“I’m sorry” He said and she only stared at him. “We will talk about it more if you want, now, please rest.” He finally opened the door. “If you need me just ring the bell next to your bed” He stepped back as she stepped inside the spacious room.

“Thank you” She said. He bowed his head slightly and then he closed the door, leaving her and her baby alone

—

When Lucien Vanserra finally found the High Lord of the Spring Court in the depths of the forest, shirtless and half-ferally cutting tree trunks with an ax that had obviously lost all sharpness years ago, making the wood splinter instead of slicing through it, he knew for sure they had come to the right place.

“What did that oak ever do to you?” He asked as a way of greeting, but Tamlin didn’t even look at him as he continued on. There was a silent rage in him he had never seen before, and he honestly felt bad for those logs of wood.

“What are you doing Tamlin?” He tried again.

“I’m cutting wood” He mumbled, as he exploded another trunk almost as thick as his torso.

“In the middle of the night” He pointed out. Tamlin simply ignored him.

Lucien sighed. “Is she okay?” He asked and Tamlin finally paused for a second, before he delivered a final blow to the last remaining log, making splitters fly across the air, getting stuck in his hair.

“She’s resting” He said, breathing much less heavily than he should be for the amount of work he had put in. “Do you know everything?” His eyes didn’t meet Lucien’s as he began to load a cart with all the wood he had exploded.

“Elain was the one who saw it for her,” Lucien explained. The whole thing was still hard to process. Lucien had seen plenty of vile things during his long life, but a betrayal of this magnitude was something that would make Beron hesitate. When Elain had explained to him and Nesta what had happened, he knew they had to leave the Night Court immediately. He had winnowed them to Spring almost instantly, after trying to get Nesta to come with them. She had declined with a determination he had learned to never cross when it came with Archerons. Elain had known Feyre would be here even before arriving, while Lucien still struggled to believe it. He had spent hours looking for Tamlin as his mate tried to gather where exactly her sister was located, since no one was willing to tell her.

“How are you feeling?” He asked his friend as he helped him with the logs of wood. Judging by the haggard look on his face he wasn’t taking the events too well.

“I’m not the one you should be asking that” He replied.

“Quit diverting my questions. I can see right through you, and you look like shit”

“Then it was a stupid question to begin with” He replied and Lucien granted him that it was.

Tamlin sat down on the floor, back resting on the wooden cart, grabbing a used and abused handkerchief from his back pocket and cleaning his face with it. Lucien brushed his hands together, getting rid of the splinters, and sat down next to him.

“How didn’t I see it?” Tamlin said to himself, looking at a distance.

“Why would you? It looked like a real mating bond, even if it was a bit… odd”

He had always thought their bond seemed a bit unbalanced, to put it in some way, but he had assumed it was a natural occurrence to Rhysand’s overly controlling nature.

Tamlin sighed loudly. “She has nowhere to go” He continued. It was a truth Lucien had known for a long time, how Feyre’s deeds had isolated her from the rest of Prythian. Now he realized it probably hadn’t been pure coincidence.

“She has you” He said. The High Lord shook his head.

“I also failed her before”

“You can make up for it now. Will you let her stay?” He asked him, but he already knew the answer. Tamlin’s hands gripped the piece of cloth tightly.

“I would never turn her away”

“He’s going to come, one way or another” Lucien said as a matter of fact.

“Let him” He spoke eerily. Lucien knew that determined gleam in his green eyes, he had only ever seen him look like that when it came to Feyre and no one else. Lucien rested his head on the cart on his back as he took a breath.

“Elain told me he made her do that promise back when she was a human… back in Under the Mountain. Why?” Tamlin tensed instantly. It was confusing, the fact that Rhysand chose a mere powerless human to mate and bear his heirs, as if he somehow knew that she would be one of the most powerful beings in Prythian. He would have to discuss this with Elain later, try to figure out what else she can gather from this whole ordeal, what did Rhysand know beforehand?

“It makes no sense” Tamlin rubbed his eyes. “I should have fought harder for her back then” His voice was hoarse.

Lucien shook his head slightly. “How?” He knew he still faulted himself for everything that had happened to her back in that gods’ awful place. “You were overpowered, we all were”

Tamlin shook his head, lost in thought, probably reliving everything. “I should have sent her further away with her family, I should have-”

“Tam” Lucien cut him off but the male barely registered it. His green eyes were bloodshot, his body so tense it was almost trembling. “Listen to me” He said with a stern voice and his friend’s gaze finally met his. “Don’t you dare blame yourself for this, not this” Lucien said, holding his eyes unflinchingly. Tamlin understood what he meant then, he could see he remembered all the times he had also looked Lucien in the eyes and told him those exact words whenever he felt like giving up after Jesminda, when the guilt had been too much to bear. He wouldn’t let him fall down that path too, not again.

“You fucked up, yes. You lost her trust once. Don’t make the same mistake” Lucien placed a hand on his shoulder. Then he stood up from the ground and offered his hand. “She’s here for a reason, Tamlin. She didn’t hesitate, she took her baby and winnowed here without a second thought”

His friend looked at him for a long moment before taking his hand as he helped him up to his feet again.

“Thank you” He said quietly but not weakly. Lucien only nodded.

“Now, quit moping and get some rest. Gotta be prepared to kick some bat’s ass if they dare present themselves” He half joked. “And knowing them, they won't take long”

—

Feyre was sitting in the bed while Elain combed her hair when the thought lit up inside her mind like a wildfire.

“Did he know?” She blurted out to her sister, who paused her movements to look at her.

“What?” She asked softly.

“That I would die and get the High Lord’s powers” She blurted. “D-did he know?”

“I don’t know” Elain said, dropping the comb on her lap.

Feyre’s mind had not stopped for one moment since she had arrived, piecing clues and conversations together as if she was finally seeing things for the first time. When Elain had finally found her she had discovered her sitting on her bed, wrapped under a towel, looking at the wall, lost in thought. This idea in particular had arrived to her like a stone falling on her head.

“He told Amarantha about me” Feyre said. “He had made Tamlin and Lucien beg on their knees for his silence, but then he told her anyway”

She looked at Elain’s face, her sister was looking at her with a mix of sadness and anger in her beautiful brown eyes.

“I can try to look.” She said. “But it may take me longer, since I can’t touch him” She said, and Feyre only nodded.

Things didn’t add up, and the fact that he had been the one to set things in motion for her to go save Tamlin made too much sense now. All of the things she had never questioned herself, had never questioned him, were now coming back to her in waves, as if she had woken up from a glamour he had placed upon her.

“Feyre” Her sister called her. “You need to rest, we will figure this out tomorrow” She caressed her hair. Feyre’s eyes landed on her sleeping child in his crib.

“Elain, I don’t think-” She swallowed hard. “I don’t see what’s the point of anything anymore”

“Don’t talk like that” Her older sister said, but Feyre couldn’t stop herself, couldn’t stop the words coming out of her mouth.

“It’s true, he destroyed everything I am, everything I was. I- I couldn’t even recognize myself anymore and I thought at least I had him, at least I had a mate and I had a family. I finally had a family and it was all fake” She couldn’t help but sob as she said the last words and Elain held her to her chest. Feyre hated crying, hated feeling weak, and that was all she felt for so long now, she didn’t know who she was, who she was supposed to be, what she was supposed to fight for. Did she even deserve to fight?

“Listen to me” Her sister held her tightly to her chest. “He didn’t destroy you” She said as she grabbed her with both hands and with surprising strength pushed her to look at her fawn-brown colored eyes. “He tried to own you, he tried to tame you and he couldn’t do it” She said, her face the definition of determination. “He will pay for what he’s done, and you-” She looked at her directly into her eyes. “You will thrive”

Feyre felt silent tears sliding down her face as her sister spoke to her in a way she had never done before.

“You have a family. You have Lucien, Nesta and me. You have him” She directed her gaze to the sleeping baby and Feyre felt the fire in her gut, the deep maternal need to protect him, to never let him go. “And you have Tamlin” Elain said more quietly, making Feyre’s eyes snap back to hers. “He will not let anything happen to you, or Nyx. I know it.”

“I don’t think I deserve it” She said with a small voice, speaking the darkest thoughts in her mind. “These people Elain, I’ve wronged them so horribly, I don’t deserve their help, their care. I don’t deserve you or Lucien or Nesta. I don’t deserve Tamlin and I certainly don’t deserve Nyx” She let the words spill from her and Elain only listened, her eyes wide and glossy.

“Then make yourself worthy again” Elain said calmly. “Look these people in the eyes and tell them you’re sorry. Help them as they help you.” Elain smiled at her softly. “Right the wrongs, find your power again. Do it for him” She nodded at her son again. “Do it for you”.

Feyre only nodded her head softly before Elain embraced her again and she let her, let herself cry and be comforted by her older sister in a way that she had never let herself before.

After a long time of crying and Elain telling her it would all be okay, Feyre finally managed to fall into a deep sleep, feeling like a child in her sister’s arms but knowing that when the day came, she would find the woman she had been before, the one who had found the strength to enter a cursed mountain and save the one she loved, the woman who had endured unimaginable things and persevered, the woman who had learned the truth and had taken a decision to leave, she would find her and she would pull her from the inside and she would not break.

Not anymore.

[nestastits]

Heyyyy!!!

I've got two questions

Favourite Nessian moment EVER

2. One thing you'd like to see in the next book

Have a good day 💕

Sorry it has taken me so long to answer this 😣.

1: Literally every scene 😭. There are so many. They are so special to me for so many reasons. But if I had to choose just one for this post I will have to go with the nightmare scene in acosf.

The nightmare was where we see the affect cassian has on Nesta and her power. Which I find very interesting. I sort of see Nesta’s power as more of its own thing. Like it has a mind of its own. I guess like a Venom type situation? If you’re a marvel fan you’ll understand my reference🤣. But Nesta can still tell it what to do. Anyways, in this scene Nesta is lost in her memories that have turned into nightmares and Rhys can’t break through her shields. He can’t contain her power either. It is Cassian who calms Nesta down with his voice and touch. And her power answers in return to him. It calls out when it hears him. And Nesta reaches out for him too. The morning after Nesta remarks on how it was Cassian’s voice that she followed to safety enough to let her mental shields down for Rhys to get her out of the nightmare. Then she talks about how Cassian looked like one of the warrior-princes from one of her childhood books which I thought was a very tender moment considering how harsh Nesta’s childhood was. And I’ve always seen Nesta as a romance reader (with some smut thrown in of course) dreaming of having her own warrior prince and now she finally has one. It’s also a scene where we first see Nesta allow herself to cry for how much someone else cares for her which is a breakthrough in her healing. Cassian also shows how much he cares for her during this scene and how uncomfortable he was seeing her in pain.

2: Honestly idk 😅. The next book could be an Elucien or Gwynriel book or potentially another Nesta book with the foreshadowing of hofas and sjm herself saying acosf was only Nesta’s happy beginning. But logically I think it will be an Elain/lucien book which I am all for!

As much as I love Night Court I’m hoping Elain will be the one to leave since she isn’t meant for that court anyways. Elain is definitely either a day court or spring court girly! I hope we see her really come into herself and see what’s in her mind. I think her story will be much different from her sisters’ because of her being the one who actually holds resentment towards being turned Fae. Elain loved her human life, she was content in marrying having children and growing old and dying. And now? Now she has to learn to live forever and what challenges come with it. She lost the only chance she had at happiness even if Graysen was yucky, she did love him and I think he loved her to an extent too. Or at least the idea of her. I’m also excited to be in Lucien’s pov finally! And I’m curious at how the bond between them will play out considering Elains wariness of it. I want a Elain x Eris brotp too😤.

I also think Elain is not a fan of the bond because she has a want to be seen by someone for who she is not because fate drives them together. I think it will be hard on her because she is already aware of the bond and it’s snapped in place. While I don’t think she is outright jealous of her sisters, maybe just a little envy? Imagine you and your sisters all getting mates but only you have the knowledge of knowing who yours is before you even actually meet them 😭 especially after being turned far through drowning in an oversized cooking pot. I’d be skeptical too. Plus Feyre and Nesta got the chance to know their mates without the pressure of the mating bond always being there, it didn’t snap in place for them until after becoming friends with their mates. But Elain and Lucien’s bond is already snapped in place, at least I think it is🤷🏼‍♀️. I understand how afraid and angry she probably is of having a Mating bond. Especially since she did excel at being human and wanting a human life. But like Feysands and Nessians bonds Elucien will fall in love with one another too. But I want Elain to live her life and go on her own journey before she jumps into a relationship with anyone.

Lastly, I need background Feysand as parents with baby nyx. I am not a fan of pregnancy trope but I’ll make an exception for cute bat baby nyxie. And of course my Nessian. I need all the soft background Nessian I can get. I need them sitting on the couch together laughing or eating chocolate cake of course. And I want to know how Elain feels about this and what goes on in her mind when she sees her sisters happy with their mates and fae life.

Hope this helps, and have an amazing day too 🫶🏻

[tadpolesonalgae]

i wanna see mor rip into az like you were saying in our last chat and see lucien and eris' reactions too. mor because i do think part of her understands that reader is hurting really badly, she attempted her own life after all. while mor is right to have her own feelings, she is generally known to be sympathetic towards hurt women. Eris because reader went to him for an escape from the NC, he was able to deduce it wasnt all sunshine and rainbows so he gave her the arrow. but he didnt know how bad it must've been that reader would turn it on herself and take it that far when she returned home. And Lucien because I think he would see Eris' niceties towards reader and see it for the older cranky brother/ younger intelligent sister relationship it is. And not even to mention Elain's own feelings on reader's attempt. I imagine that similar to cassian, lucien would take both into account before making an opinion.

headcanon that its lucien who drops the bomb on eris that reader attempted her own life with an ash arrow. 👀 eris has been shown to have a soft spot for Luc so i imagine him giving a little bit more of a genuine reaction to news like that from his lil brother? which would be fun to see, (soft eris when!?!?!?!?!?)

Idk I wanna see Luc advocate for reader and imagine the angst from like an Az POV too 👀Bc he talked sm shit ab reader and praised elain, and heres elain's mate defending reader in front of elain? Az's ego needs the hit and i think that in the right circumstance it would make him reconsider his own actions and make amends. I also think it would be a pleasant surprise for reader, to see someone she rarely interacts with still defend her. Not necessarily because he knows her but because it's the right thing to do, which would rock her world and give her a perspective change.

Elucien and Nessian in the way that you write them are really good support systems for reader rn. Elain offers her sweetness, Luc is a good advocate, Nesta is a protector, and Cass is relaxed. All things that i think reader needs rn.

It would also be a perfect way to introduce Helion 👉👈🥺

CC SPOILERS BELOW:

how do you think bryce and reader would have interacted? Im super curious to hear your thoughts as someone who wasn't into CC 👀 and how would you imagine she would react to ember and randall. (assuming the IC would let her anywhere near someone from another universe🤫)

-🤠 aka lucien's #1 defender

‘while mor is right to have her own feelings, she is generally known to be sympathetic towards hurt women.’

I feel like I’m struggling with this honestly? I feel like Mor would want to help reader because she’s obviously hurting, but then Mor is also hurting because of something reader’s chosen to do, which puts Mor in a difficult situation of grappling with her conflicting emotions? I hope chapter 18 doesn’t make Mor seem super unfeeling in one particular part 😭🫠

‘Eris because reader went to him for an escape from the NC, he was able to deduce it wasnt all sunshine and rainbows so he gave her the arrow.’

I’d lowkey like to see what Eris would do if he found out reader tried to kill herself? Especially recalling that part where he says something like ‘either do something or just lie down and die’? 😭 I can’t remember what it was exactly, but his own words kind of biting him in the ass/coming back to haunt him I imagine would be kind of funny 🫢

‘And Lucien’

WHERE DID YOU PULL LUCIEN FROM? 🔮

‘because I think he would see Eris' niceties towards reader and see it for the older cranky brother/ younger intelligent sister relationship it is.’

Ooooh this is something interesting because I’m of the mindset that Lucien still sees Eris as the rest of the IC does? That he’s so accustomed to this one view of his brother it’s difficult to see past the pain of his childhood in autumn? But I think that’s shows anyway in chapter 18 😳😭

‘And not even to mention Elain's own feelings on reader's attempt.’

Part of me wants to have more scenes where the wound is just split completely open and we get to see all the messy innards of the whole situation, but I don’t think I’m ready for a scene like that? I don’t think I’d be able to write it well?

I’m more of the position that things are sometimes better left to the imagination? Or not being touched on so directly and rather just seeing small traces and hints of it? We’ll see what happens later on in the story though when…stuff happens 😭🫣

(I forbid you from using any mystical powers to possibly guess what those events might be)

‘headcanon that its lucien who drops the bomb on eris that reader attempted her own life with an ash arrow. 👀’

I would love this, however I don’t think Elain would tell Lucien? While they’re close, they aren’t official or anything as serious as that? And also I think Elain would know how uncomfortable reader would get with more people knowing about it? But at the same time I agree that Lucien would be good and supporting kind of how Cassian does?

‘It would also be a perfect way to introduce Helion 👉👈🥺’

GIRL not more Helion 😭🤦🙄

‘how do you think bryce and reader would have interacted?’

You keep canon Bryce FAR away from my dear cbmthy reader!! Fanon Bryce though, they’d be such good girl friends 😭 despite their obvious differences of course 👀

‘and how would you imagine she would react to ember and randall. ‘

I’m going to be honest, I hardly remember anything about Ember and Randall so I can’t answer 😭 though I did read some more of CC3 a few days ago! Slowly trying to make my way through it 😭💪

‘-🤠 aka lucien's #1 defender’

I’m still so befuddled where your mind pulled Lucien from since I don’t think he’s been mentioned since part 4 😭

[starsreminisce]

What do you think is Elain's relationship with the cauldron and the mother?

You know, I haven't really been able to get a good feel for it either because I'll go one way and then go completely another. Sometimes I feel like the Cauldron is sated and happy Nesta gave back what it took, so we're not going to see any more of it, but there is also a part of me that thinks there are just some things that each sister is going to work through with their book, and the Cauldron is one of them. Elain and Lucien have quite a good chunk to get through, and I wonder if that's why we are going back to the Spring Court because of the mural Feyre saw and how it seems to begin with what Nesta saw in HOFAS through the tunnels. Like, in my head, Elucien would deal with/uncover what happened to Prythian 15k years ago, and then Gwynriel would deal with what happened during the war 500 years ago.

With her relationship to the Mother, this passage really stood out to me. Nesta was very deliberate in saying that she wants to give back her powers to save Feyre, the baby, and Rhys, and then she said that she changed herself so that they wouldn't have to go through this specific trauma again, especially since she's come to terms with the fact that Cassian is her mate and wants to accept the bond. But the tendrils of light had touched on all three sisters to Nyx, and I wonder if that's something SJM will come back to later, if she decides to go back to it at all.

The light glimmered down Feyre’s arms. Her legs. It suffused her ashen face. Began to fill the room. Cassian’s Siphons guttered, as if sensing a power far beyond his own, beyond any of theirs. Tendrils of light drifted between the sisters. And one, delicate and loving, floated toward Mor. To the bundle in her arms, setting the silent babe within glowing bright as the sun.

There is this sort of "I am not your strongest soldier!" energy that both Elain and Lucien seem to have for me. Lucien was willing to leave the court for Jesminda and stay in the Spring Court being second to Tamlin, and Elain was preparing to be wedded to Graysen and upkeep the home she would be receiving until they both found themselves in Hybern and experienced the moment that redefined what they wanted from life and how it's not what fate had in store for them.

I still have a very hard time believing in a two-mate theory, and the more I think about it, the more disgusted I become with it because of its implications. Not that it matters because Lucien doesn't behave any differently towards Elain than Cassian or Rhysand do to their mates; even the same verbiage has been used. SJM has not once foreshadowed two mates in ACOTAR, even when she had the opportunity to do so with Tamlin and Eris.

Alis and Rhys said the same exact thing, and essentially, it's fate.

“No.” Alis slung her satchel over a shoulder. “Go home. I’ll take you as far as the wall. There’s naught to be done now. Tamlin will remain her slave forever, and Prythian will stay under her rule. That’s what Fate dealt, that was what the Eddies of the Cauldron decided.”

“I’m serious.” I turned toward him and crossed my arms. “What decides it? Who decides it?” Rhys straightened his lapels before plucking an invisible piece of lint from them. “Fate, the Mother, the Cauldron’s swirling eddies …”

Hope this helps! Thank you again for asking!