#it’s rowdy and hilarious

[theeryn-the-gold]

i want “S2 E33 - An Extremely Goofy Episode” written on my gravestone

[grandmoments]

That's how you show your uninterest!

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency

[84reedsy]

Happy Birthday to the Rowdy one himself, Roddy Piper!

[probably-impossible]

The thing about Rawhide is that sometimes it's really, really good, and sometimes they’re being haunted by druids.

[agardenofbasil]

https://x.com/barcauniversal/status/1834346246326419879?s=46&t=Y0Md76L8FR9umM1nmCkHnQ

now this is interesting

Haha, I was just talking about this with another friend. It seems like Unai is quite stoic and serious most of the time, but when he's drunk and celebrating...

After I started writing LFTS, I found this video of Unai sliding on the ground? During the Euro celebrations?? He also seems hilarious to interview while tipsy, and I wish I knew what he was saying here because he looks so giddy and silly.

And then of course, then there's this really silly video with David Raya which is just hysterical. And I think there's another video where he tries to open a beer with his teeth???

Long story short, my man contains multitudes, and I would absolutely love to be on the phone with a drunk Unai Simon. 🍃

[warhaeds]

ive been playing the sims with wash + his kids (and evie) and wash's daughter helena managed to romance a boy who in fact wears a paper bag over his head. but he is so cute. and asked to move in before they were even dating.

[lupismaris]

The most important thing to remember about this playlist is of course that they're all songs the characters can, have, and will dance/make out drunkenly to. Remember that. It's glorious.

[ratatatastic]

paul forcing cats to be mentors is hilarious but also ekky being paired with a swede... fork found in kitchen...

[adamwatchesmovies]

Road House (1989)

Road House makes you wonder what kind of yesmen director Rowdy Herrington surrounds himself with. A surefire way to make a film unintentionally funny is to take a mundane subject way too seriously. This film makes your average season of Yu-Gi-Oh! seem grounded in reality by comparison.

James Dalton (Patrick Swayze) is a professional “cooler”. He will enter even the rowdiest bar/club and de-escalate any fights that break out like no other man could. He's hired by Frank Tilghman (Kevin Tighe) to help transform the Double Deuce into a renowned, classy establishment. Unfortunately, the man with a mysterious past may be biting off more than he can chew.

With that setup, I bet you wouldn’t expect to see threats, vandalism, arson, murder and a monster truck destroy a building in broad daylight but Road House has all that and more. This movie is ridiculous with a capital R. The Double Deuce sees the kind of nightly brawls that would require it to replace every piece of furniture and glassware daily. They must sweep up at least 5 centimeters of glass, alcohol and blood off the floor every night before closing. It’s the grown-up version of Pleasure Island in Disney’s Pinocchio. People are breaking things, dancing on tables, pulling out weapons, throwing each other out of windows, etc. You wonder whether the Double Deuce’s lead singer (played by Jeff Healey) is blind because he got hit in the face while performing, or whether he performs at the Double Deuce because he can’t see what’s going on every night. Mad Max was more civilized than this Missouri club and that was set after World War III!

In this world of chaos walks James Dalton and his set of cool-dude rules that are sure to bring order to the asylum. First order of business? get rid of the problematic staff. I could’ve told you that one. If Mr. Tilghman had any sense he could’ve spotted the one doing drugs, having sex with ladies in the back, or skimming from the till from a mile away. Actually, if he had any sense, he would’ve just burned the place down and rebuilt it from scratch. No matter how much they clean the place, they can't expect the clientele to change overnight, can they? Surely all of the nightmarish patrons weren’t all brought over by the film’s main villain, moneybags Brad Wesley (Ben Gazzara). Well, maybe they were actually. The man’s got nothing better to do than systematically ruin other people’s lives for the thrill of it. His character is so flat and badly written the biggest surprise is that he doesn’t turn out to be a rapist - which helps make this movie a lot more fun. He’s so evil you half expect him to get banished by a crucifix at the end.

Road House wants to be cool, wants to be adult so bad it’s one of the most juvenile pictures you’ll ever see. There’s so much nudity in the film and the sex is so gratuitous it’ll make you blush. The violence is equally over-the-top, with what has to be one of the greatest movie deaths ever coming out of nowhere - even though it was foreshadowed ahead of time. You thought what you heard was an exaggeration? Oh, you poor thing.

Road House is exactly the kind of movie you want when looking for something “so bad it’s good”. It has the bad acting, the ludicrous dialogue, the implausible plot, the I-can't-believe-they-just-said-that quotes. Best of all, it’s always moving. It may be bad but it is never, ever boring. This is one for the ages. I’m calling it a must-see if you like your laughs ironic. (April 7, 2022)

[milliondollarbaby87]

Road House (1989) Review

James Dalton is a bouncer who was hired to clean up one of the worst bars in a small Missouri town, what he didn’t realise was that trying to do this would see the villianious local entrepreneur Brad Wesley to rebel against it. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Continue reading Road House (1989) Review

[room4creation]

HIIII post ball my life was lowkey out of wack bc of how distrosous my room was but ive sorted it now it is 2am. Think I didn’t have a hangover today because I consumed basically a whole pack of salami at 4:30am. But back to the ball… SO FUN but I fear I have said too much this one guy… hopefully he just forgot everything interesting I told him and has focused completely on me therapising him abt the girl he likes from home 😭😭 god a lot happened last night but it was very very fun

[grandmoments]

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency

[thesuperiorrobin]

late night chaos~

Damian Wayne is a very light sleeper, or so he says. But you somehow manage to slip out of his arms in the middle of the night after hearing your almost one-year-old twins giggling away on the baby monitors.

Even then Damian didn’t budge in his sleep and it wasn’t until about thirty minutes later he was stirring awake—feeling colder the usual. He brings his hand tiredly to slide across your spot in bed but you weren’t there. Damian’s fully awake now, eyes wide as a part of him starts to panic but hearing your soft laughing and his children giggling loudly makes him sigh.

He gets out of bed and leaves the bedroom he shares with you, following the waves of laughter that fill the quiet halls of the home. The giggling leads him to the twin's shared bedroom and when he opens the door you three are nowhere in sight leaving him puzzled, until the sudden movement in the twin's big teepee in the corner of their room.

He walks forward—the sound of his steps is nonexistent and as he stops in front of the teepee he pulls back the loose fabric. You lay there—on the big mattress on the ground with both twins who sit upright, well your daughter finds it more hilarious when she’s climbing over you and you push her back gently and your son’s blabbing away nonsense (but you pretend like you understand).

It makes you laugh and Damian swears he’s fallen for you even more. With a glance at the entrance of the teepee, you frown quickly.

“Oh!” You say and it catches the twin's attention “I’m sorry….did we wake you?”

“No…” he shakes his head with a soft smile “I had to use the bathroom, I was wondering where you went” he lies to which you can tell but you say nothing and let out a soft hum, the twins focused now on Damian as you reach other them and pat the empty spot next to them.

“join us?”

He says nothing and obeys your request getting comfortable before you throw over the thick blanket that was over yours and at some point the twins. And once settles down both twins attack him, crawling to him and giggling.

He lets out a breathy laugh which you smile at. “Lively these two are tonight, huh beloved?” His green eyes glance down at your lying and you nod

“Been like this for a while now, woke me up to the sounds of them blabbering to each other. Must be a twin thing” You fight the urge to let out a yawn and he’s quick to notice.

“Tried?” He asked softly, twins wiggling in his grasp and you shook your head “Get some sleep”

“You need more sleep than I do, you just came home from patrol not even two hours ago”

“I’ll manage just fine”

“Well…I guess we’re both staying up with the rowdy twins tonight”

And in return the twins break out in a fit of giggle leaving you and Damian baffled for a second—before join them in a fit of soft laughters too.

Gave them twins cause I couldn’t decide

[lemonlover1110]

𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐥

Sukuna

Pairing: Sukuna x f!Reader

Summary: Sukuna's twins are miniature versions of himself which can only mean one thing: they're two little demons.

Warnings: MDNI, family content, fluff(?), dad!Sukuna, smut, oral sex (m. receiving), titjob, nipple play

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Sukuna had to change a lot of things in his life when his twins came along. The man that never imagined he’d become a father, was lucky enough to knock up his girlfriend. Or wife, whatever he gets to call you now. One very unlucky lucky night he decided that protection was a stupid idea, but the universe got back at him to teach him a life lesson, and you ended up pregnant with two– Not one, but two babies. 

Sure, Sukuna loves his babies and all that shit which made it easier for him to change into a better person. He’s not a stellar parent or anything, and during the first year of their life he was struggling to figure it out but the job has gotten easier. He’d argue that the job is fun too, seeing the little shits form their own personalities or whatever is interesting. 

Though one could say that it’s only fun for Sukuna since the kids are turning out just like their father. For you, on the other hand, it is stressful. Having two children screaming just like their father isn’t exactly fun, not when you have to correct them. It was hilarious to watch Sukuna teach his nephew cuss words for the little guy to run around, yelling the atrocities (nearly giving his father a heart attack); it’s not fun when you’re in the mother’s shoes. 

“Fuck you-” “We don’t say that around here!” “Daddy says it!”

“Motherfucker!” “Watch your mouth!” “Daddy told me I can say it!”

It’s a never-ending correction in your home, and it doesn’t help that your husband doesn’t help you out. Sukuna kind of does his part by watching his mouth around the pair, but that’s not enough anymore. They’re almost six, it’s too late for them to unlearn certain words… or other behaviors. 

“Stop arguing you two!” You yell from the kitchen, hearing them bicker about something. They’re always arguing because one is mean to the other. Sukuna’s genes are too strong. Luckily for you, you were blessed with a girl and a boy so you don’t have to try again for another baby. You won’t have to repeat this.

“Ugly bastard!” Akane, your baby girl, yells. And you wish it was a moment where you got to think if you heard wrong because your baby girl would never say that, but she would. This one says it nearly daily.

“Akane, if I hear one more word out of you, girl! I swear–” You’re cut off by your husband, startling you as he hugs you from behind. He’s not listening, or well, he is and he doesn’t want you to correct the girl.

“Aren’t you just so proud of her?” He sounds elated, knowing his daughter sounds just like him. If only you could share that sentiment. You push him away and focus on finishing lunch for the little rascals. 

“My girl friends invited me out, and guess what? You’re taking over tonight.” You tell him, and Sukuna’s eyes widen. You’ve never made that threat before– Usually when you go out, you take them along or drop them off at someone else’s place because you doubt Sukuna can handle them. The longest they’ve been alone has been an hour.

“Someone will end up getting stabbed.” Is his answer, hoping that it’s enough to scare you into staying. Sukuna loves his babies, but he knows he can’t handle them. He made a grave mistake by molding them into mini versions of himself. Sukuna can’t control himself, how is he able to control two small Sukunas?

“And it’s probably going to be you if you don’t play your cards right. Good luck.” You answer, making it clear that you’re not staying home no matter what. You don’t acknowledge Sukuna as he begins to tell you the horrific sights that you might come home to. Sure, your kids are rowdy and a lot like their father but they won’t burn the house down… if you hide the matches.

“Akira! Akane! Come here!” You ignore him, calling your kids for their lunch. Sukuna sighs, rolling his eyes. 

They can’t be too bad…

“Hold his legs!” Akane yells to her brother while she pulls Sukuna’s hair. He doesn’t know what happened, he just fell asleep on the couch and woke up to his arms being restrained while one twin wipes something on his face. 

“What the fuck are you two doing?!” Sukuna raises his voice, rightfully so considering the position he’s in right now. He was warned, yet chose not to listen. Sukuna could kick the little shit that’s trying to tie him together but he won’t in fear that he might be too harsh and send the kid to the hospital. Oh, he hates them so much right now but any other time he’s willing to give up his life for them.

“We’re just playing.” Akira answers, and Sukuna could strangle one of the twins right at this moment– Too bad his hands are tied. How is this playing? Are they simulating a kidnapping or what?

“Untie me, now!” He orders, but his words go in one ear and out the other. He’s not mommy, he’s not uptight and lets them do whatever so this must be a joke.

“Quick, grab mommy’s makeup!” Akane yells, and Sukuna clenches his jaw. He’s trying to free himself, but they got him good. He needs to check what the kids are watching from now on because this is worrying for him.

“Akane, let me go before I get angry.” Sukuna threatens, but what can he possibly do when he’s tied up? 

“I got it!” Her twin comes into the living room with your makeup bag. Sukuna is squirming, trying his best to break free from his confinement but he can’t. Did they catch him while he was tying you up or what? No… He remembers locking the door. 

“If you two don’t let me free in this instant, I’ll make you pay!” Sukuna sounds intimidating, clearly angry at this little stunt. Unfortunately for him, they don’t take him seriously. They fear no one.

“You sound funny.” Akane laughs before pulling on his hair, which makes a cry escape his lips. Oh, he’d love this father thing if they were like you. This whole thing is getting annoying, but not only for him; the pair is getting tired of hearing their father cry and scream. “Akira, grab the tape, daddy is getting annoying.”

“What the fuck are you going to do?! I am your father, you two have to listen to me!” Sukuna is trying his best to break free before the twins tape his mouth and end up killing him. And by some miracle, just as they get their hands on the tape, the front door opens.

He prays that it’s you, ready to save him from the twins’ evil plan. It’s not you, but the next best thing. Sukuna doesn’t waste a second before yelling, “Jin! Stop them before they kill me!”

“What’s happening here?” His brother looks around confused. What did he just walk in on? He got a text from you to check in on his brother since Sukuna would be alone with the twins… and this happens. He sees his beloved nephew walk back with a roll of tape, and Jin picks him up from the ground. “What are you two doing to your dad?”

“They’re trying to kill me!” Sukuna yells, which the twins argue,

“We’re just playing!” Which makes a chuckle come from Jin. It isn’t funny– Well, maybe just a bit. It’s hilarious to see Sukuna get a taste of his own medicine.

“Now, you two, let your dad go.” Jin says, and at that moment they huff and puff. But they listen. He’s watching Sukuna’s expressions, and he stops the twins before they completely free him. “Stop. Go to your rooms.”

“What?! Don’t–” Before Sukuna can finish yelling, they’ve run away. They aren’t going to listen to him. Once they’re out of sight, Jin frees Sukuna and holds the man down, not trusting him enough to let him go.

“You’re not going to do anything to them, right?” Jin sounds as if he were Sukuna’s dad, which only pisses the man off more.

“The fuck am I going to do to them? I didn’t kick the little shit when he was tying my legs because I didn’t want to hurt him.” Sukuna makes a great point, but Jin wasn’t there to witness it. Right now he sees an angry man, and he wants to make sure Sukuna calms down before anything. “Why the hell are you here anyway?”

“Your wife called me to check up on you, and I came just in time.” Jin answers, sitting down beside Sukuna once he knows that his brother is calm enough. Sukuna wants to be mad at you for not trusting him enough to watch his own kids, but he also wants to thank you for saving him tonight. 

“Don’t tell her what you saw.” Sukuna quickly says. It’s more of a warning than a request. Sukuna takes a deep breath. He should be asking what the kids were going to do to him– It wasn’t going to be anything too bad, probably just put on some makeup on him or some other stupid trick. They knew he was going to say no if he asked, so they chose to tie him up. The thought isn’t too far fetched considering who their father is. What he’s thinking right now is,

“Why would they listen to you and not me?” Sukuna wonders, and Jin has an idea as to why. “I mean I’m terrifying, but you? You look like you catch jellyfish with a net and work at the Krusty Krab.”

“Ah, they’re into Spongebob now.” Jin can’t help but laugh. He won’t take the insults to heart since this has always been Sukuna. “I feel like they do find you scary, they just don’t think that you’ll do anything to them if they torment you.”

“What the fuck are you saying?” Sukuna isn’t in the mood for this. He can’t just wrap his head around this whole situation.

“You let them get away with a lot when it comes to you. You don’t let them get away with anything when it comes to their mother or other family.” Jin explains, which is valid reasoning but Sukuna rolls his eyes. That isn’t the answer he’s looking for, therefore he won’t accept it.

“Whatever you say. I’m going to check up on them before they flood the house.” Sukuna stands up from his seat, leaving his brother behind. The twins can’t be trusted for too long. 

Lo and behold, they found the matches. 

“You two came into my life as karma, huh?” Sukuna asks, before taking the matches from their grimy hands. “Akane, go annoy your uncle. Akira, you’re getting a bath and that’s final.”

“I thought you said I could bathe only once a week.” Akira points out the agreement they’ve had, but Sukuna has changed his mind. 

“I changed my mind when you and your sister did a kidnapping simulation with me. Plus, your mother says you stink and she doesn’t like you anymore so go to the tub.” Sukuna is not scared of making a little white lie to hurt his son’s feelings. It’s the least he could do.

“Mommy doesn’t what?” Akira’s eyes become watery, his bottom lip quivering at the thought of his mother not loving him anymore. Sukuna would feel a twinge of remorse any other night. 

“He’s lying, bubba.” Akane goes to his brother’s side to comfort him. She might be a little devil, but she has her soft spot. She hugs him tightly and Sukuna has to tear his eyes away from the sickly sweet scene. They won’t get to him. “You do stink but mommy loves you. She told us she loved us before leaving.”

“A lie she told you since she’s not coming back because you stink.” Sukuna isn’t going to stop, even when he hears his son cry. The boy pushes his sister away and runs to the bathroom to wash himself to make his mother come back. Hearing his own son cry is tough, but he’ll pat himself on the back later. 

“You’re next. Now go to your uncle, ask about Yuji or some shit.” Sukuna looks at his daughter, who is more resilient than her brother. She’s only five though, so he can find a way to get through to her with no issue. “Your birthday is coming up soon, huh? Guess I’ll–”

“I’m going!” She yells before Sukuna can finish his sentence, making a smirk come to his face. Smart girl.

He can handle them for the rest of the night, especially with Jin here.

When you come home, your little demons are sound asleep in their bedroom. You tuck them in, and admire the sight that you never see during the day. They almost look like they were sent straight from heaven. It’s a nice sight to come home too.

Your opinion changes when you enter your bedroom and find your husband throwing his clothes into a suitcase. You’ve noticed that over the past years he’s become increasingly dramatic. You let your presence be known as a chuckle escapes your lips, standing in the doorway.

“Is it because they tied you up?” You question, and a frown comes to his lips.

“I told Jin to not tell you. But yes.” He answers, and you step into the room. You shut the door behind you, locking the door just in case things escalate. “They don’t take me seriously, and I told you things wouldn’t go well if you left me alone with them but there you go, going out with your friends.”

“I can’t stay locked up forever taking care of them.” You respond, and he rolls his eyes.

“Leave them with Jin. They take him seriously.” Sukuna says, and you chuckle.

“Unpack your stuff, baby. Stop being so dramatic.” You tell him, heading over to the bathroom to get ready for bed. That’s not enough for him right now though. 

“I’m leaving and never coming back.” Sukuna sounds like a child, which is hilarious. Only those two can get that side out of him. He’ll continue no matter what you say, so you do the next best thing. You lift up your shirt, and his eyes widen for a moment before he tears them away.

“Your boobs aren’t going to work this time.” He claims, and you fix your shirt. He sucks his bottom lip between his teeth before sighing, “But they do help.”

“Come here, baby.” You walk over to him, wrapping your arms around him. Sukuna hugs you back, and he could sob (just for the dramatics).

“They’re so mean.” Sukuna’s head rests on your shoulder, as his hand travels under your shirt to squeeze your boob. “Can you make me feel better?”

“Can you–” You begin but before you can even finish, Sukuna pulls away and throws the suitcase on the ground. He’ll unpack later. You open your mouth to speak again but he grabs the back of your head and pulls you into a rough kiss. 

His tongue wanders around your mouth, his free hand going under your shirt once again. It’s an old trick, but every time you show him your breasts, he forgets anything and everything. You don’t do it when the matter is a serious issue, but you really can’t do much about the fact that your twins are straight from hell.

Sukuna sits down on the bed, lifting up your shirt, prompting you to take it off. Once it’s out of the way, his tongue licks up your body before giving your tits attention. He rolls his tongue around your nipple while his hand plays with the other one, pinching your nipple and squeezing your boob. You really get him, knowing the exact way to get him to calm down. He pulls away, and kisses between your breasts until he gets to the other tit. He switches to your other tit and entertains himself once again.

He’s having so much fun, his mouth preoccupied with you but there’s an uncomfortable sensation between his pants. He unlatches, looking up at you with lustful eyes. Your gaze falls on the tent in his pants, making you bite down your lip.

“Help me out.” He says, and you help him unbuckle out. You pull down his pants, freeing his cock from its confinement. You kneel down in front of him, a smirk on your lips. This is a great way to apologize.

You spit on his cock before your hand wraps around the base. You lower your head, tongue circling around the tip as your hand strokes his dick. You start off so painfully slow, too painful for Sukuna. You lower your head, taking as much of his dick as you can.

You slowly bob your head, hands wrapping around the park of his cock that is outside and stroking it for him. It’s like heaven for him, though he just wants to push your head down and force you to take all of his cock. You can take it like a good girl, right? He won’t take any risks tonight.

“You can take it all.” You lift your head, and Sukuna whines. You were barely even doing anything, why did you feel the need to stop? A spark appears on his eyes, a smirk coming to his face as you cup your tits. He judged too soon.

You put his cock between your chest, squeezing your cleavage together before moving it up and down his dick. Sukuna’s eyes nearly roll to the back of his head at the feeling of your tits squeezing around him. He grabs the back of your head, pulling back and telling you, “Open your fucking mouth.”

And without missing a beat, you obey, sticking your tongue out. He spits in your mouth, and you swallow immediately. This is the reason why you ended up with twins– You just do shit that makes him feel every inch of your body raw, a need. You’re so obedient and generous with him.

Your soft flesh between his cock is too much for him, and such a nice sight as he watches them jiggle. You should do this more often is all that he can think as your hands pick up speed. He’s rolling his hips, lightly moaning as his breath gets heavy. 

“Good job.” You hear, which tells you all that you need to know. He barely praises you unless he’s close.

“Cum for me, baby. Do it all over my tits.” You tell him, and he bites down his lips to not sound pathetic. Oh, he has to control himself tonight because you might end up with another child. He can’t have that. 

His hands grip the bed sheets as he finishes all over you. His cum covers your chest, all the way up to your neck. Your fingers swipes it, bringing it up to your lips simply for his entertainment, but he’s looking for something else in the nightstand.

He could die right now.

“Ran out of condoms, and I’m not risking anything.” He’s in so much pain as the words leave his lips, and you furrow your brows. Since when has this been an issue?

“You can pull out.” You remind him, but that isn’t cutting it for Sukuna.

“I said I’m not risking anything.” He couldn’t make it any clearer. Tonight was certainly… An experience to say the least.

“Can you at least eat me out?” You ask him, standing up from the ground. There’s no way you’re going unrewarded tonight.

“You have a vibrator, work it out.” He shrugs, and you glare at him. He’s pissed off with you again, leaving him with the twins was a horrible mistake on your part.

“You’re such a jerk.” You roll your eyes at him, and hearing him chuckle makes you want to hit him. You manage to restrain yourself, managing to mutter out a simple, “Fuck you.”

“Aw, they get it from you. How cute.” He says, which makes your palm lightly slap his forehead. “Hey! Maybe next time don’t leave me alone–”

“The vibrator is going to do a better job than you anyway.” You cut him off, going to the bathroom to clean yourself up… Getting all dirty and for what? 

“If you really want another pair, I’ll give them to you.” Sukuna stands up, following behind you to annoy you.

“Get a fucking vasectomy.” You respond, and you feel his arms wrap around you, stopping you from going any further. Of course he can’t leave you alone. “Sukuna, I’m going to shower.”

“I’ll help you.” 

[mr-mandalorian]

ghost proposing, a little angst but very very sweet

they have the night off and he’d already be devouring her whole if she wasn’t so excited about going out. it’s a shit bar close to base, but she reasons it’s a good change of scenery.

and boy is it, terrible karaoke heard a mile away. the military wives, or rather soon to be, taken over. a bachelorette party of at least six women, loud and obnoxious.

soap and gaz find it to be the most hilarious thing in the world, applauding a brunette on stage over her disastrous performance of careless whisper. but ghost can’t help but watch y/n, her smile not quite reaching her eyes. throughout the night he silently dissects her, his assumption it being some sort of yearning for female company. but as one of the women come up to their table, asking if anyone from the squad could take a picture of the rowdy group, ghost swallows harshly. y/n jumps at the opportunity, congratulating the bride like they’ve know each other their whole lives.

they never discussed the nature of their relationship. hell, the word relationship was never even voiced out loud. but even a stranger could tell how they moved in sync, his reflection and her shadow. in their line of work it was best case scenario and simon never allows himself to think about there ever being more.

but that is until y/n asks to see the ring. it’s almost comical, the gigantic diamond blinding, making her squint. ghost finds himself scoffing behind the mask, he could easily read y/n’s compliment a lie. she would never wear anything like it.

the following months ghost finds himself ring shopping. fucking hell, what is he thinking, really? his tongue can’t even roll the world girlfriend. and yet here he is, glaring at the poor saleswoman like she’s supposed to know none of these expensive rocks are good enough for his y/n.

when the ring is finally chosen, he doesn’t quite know what to do. he’s horrified of y/n finding it so the ring stays on his person at all times, even in the field. he’s less talkative than usual, if that’s even possible, always looking for the right moment. brushing their teeth together in the morning, ghost buried between her thighs in the evening. he nearly does it one late night, y/n perched on the window sill of her room. swimming in moonlight, she looks ethereal. he’s done unimaginable things in his life, taken and saved lives. none of the gore ever phased him, but the sight of her has his stomach turning.

so he chickens out. regret begins to gnaw at him as the very next mission goes haywire. y/n barks at him through the comms, the sweetest sound in the world, even if she’s telling him to get out, explosives ticking in the building. he’s trying, he really is. his gear seems to get heavier by the minute with a broken rib threatening to seize his lungs. he can make out her silhouette by the exit, but it’s out of reach. the floor crumbles beneath him.

when ghost wakes up, he immediately spots soap pacing back and forth, as much as the tiny ward of the hospital would allow him. y/n is passed out in the chair next to his bed, his balaclava clutched to her chest.

“good to have you back, lt.” soap whispers not to wake the sleeping soldier. “how ye feeling?”

“was she hurt?”

“no.” soap shakes his head, knowing how important the answer is before he can move on to his long awaited teasing, pulling out a velvet box out of his pocket. “i suppose it was foolish to question who this belonged to then. didn’t take you for the marrying kind, lt.”

he wasn’t, but if it pleased y/n, he’d marry her a thousand times. and even though ghost wants to be annoyed with the sergeant, he’s already decided to promote him to best man for finding the ring before y/n could.

when ghost gets released, it takes time to find courage to open the velvet box. it’s barely holding together, taking most of the damage to protect what’s inside. the ring is chipped, the intricate band of petite diamonds has at least five distinct cuts. they’re surprisingly neat, but asymmetrical and obvious to they eye. he can only curse, what a fool he was to convince himself that there could be something more.

“what’s that?” y/n is right next to him, her stealth impressive as she appears unnoticed in his room.

he can tell her awe for the ring is genuine, eyes eyes lighting up at the piece of jewelry. she pries it out of his hold, standing close to the window to examine the gems reflecting daylight. she disregards the cracks completely, telling him it adds character to it. the sincerity of her smile makes it hard to breathe.

“so who’s the lucky girl then?” she asks, never once trying on the ring.

“who- who’s the lucky girl? bloody hell woman, who do you think?”

they’re both dumbfounded, y/n by the answer and ghost by the question. and ghost knows he said the wrong thing as y/n shrinks in her spot, her gaze glued to the floor.

“i mean- i- i really don’t know.” she stutters, growing shy likes he’s never seen her before.

“try it on.”

“what?“

“come here.“

y/n allows him to hold her hand, sliding the ring on her finger with utmost care. it fits perfect, just her size and taste. her eyes jump between him and the ring, mind going a mile a minute.

“what do you reckon?“ his voice is low and quiet, and that’s all he says. it dawns on her that he’s really doing this, proposing in the most simon riley way possible.

“i didn’t even know we were dating.” she can’t help the jaw numbing smile that overtakes her, gently squeezing her hand in his.

“‘cause we’re not. we’re engaged.”

[prettymfwrites]

CaitVi Streamer Headcanons

Streamer Caitlyn x Streamer Vi x female Reader Headcanons

1. Streamer Chaos

Caitlyn’s streams are polished, focused, and often tactical, whether she’s dominating in FPS games or discussing strategies with her chat. She’s the analytical one, always reading her opponents and responding gracefully, even in defeat.

Vi, on the other hand, streams pure chaos. She’s loud, competitive, and incredibly reactive to the highs and lows of her games. Her stream often involves a lot of trash-talking, slamming the desk (lightly), and sometimes standing up mid-game to shout at the screen.

You? You’re their grounding force, occasionally wandering between the two setups to bring snacks, drinks, or calm them down when a particularly intense game has them riled up.

2. Cute Interactions on Stream

Sometimes, you appear on Vi’s stream just to egg her on. “Babe, Cait’s gonna destroy you again if you keep rushing in like that,” you tease, leaning into her frame.

Caitlyn's chat loves seeing you pop into her stream because you always bring a sense of calm. You’ll hand her a cup of tea or sneak a kiss to her cheek, prompting Caitlyn’s infamous deadpan: “Don’t let Vi see this,she might cry.”

When Caitlyn and Vi stream together, their streams are full of back-and-forth banter, playful insults, and moments of teamwork that go hilariously wrong. You’re often caught in the crossfire when they drag you into their antics.

3. Dinner Drama

After Caitlyn utterly demolishes Vi in an intense round of Apex Legends, Vi refuses to speak. You bring dinner to the table, trying not to laugh at her overdramatic huffs and pouts.

Caitlyn doesn’t help, though. She casually asks for a dinner roll, knowing full well it’ll set Vi off. As predicted, Vi flings the roll at Caitlyn, who dodges dramatically before laughing and picking it up. “You missed, sweetheart.”

Caitlyn leans over Vi’s chair, wrapping her arms around her and pressing teasing kisses to her cheek. “I can’t believe you let this unhinged mongoose beat you,” she murmurs, her tone dripping with amusement. Vi tries to hold back a smile, but her mumbled “shut up” only makes you both giggle harder.

4. Protective Moments

Vi’s chat can get rowdy, and while most fans adore your presence, there’s always a troll or two who makes snide comments about you. The first time it happens, Vi is not having it. She stops her game mid-round, fixes her camera with a death glare, and goes on a fiery rant about respecting her girlfriend.

Caitlyn, however, handles trolls differently. She’ll casually ban them without a second thought, coolly saying, “You’re clearly not here for the right reasons. Bye.” Her chat cheers her on every time.

You feel so loved by how fiercely they both protect you, though you often tell them not to worry about the comments. “They’re just jealous they don’t get dinner rolls thrown at them by Vi,” you joke.

5. Competitive Chaos

When Vi loses a game to Caitlyn (which happens often), she’ll dramatically collapse into your lap while you’re sitting nearby, whining, “Why are you with her when she’s such a bully?”

You can’t help but laugh, running your fingers through her hair. Caitlyn, from her desk, will smirk and say, “Because I bring her snacks and don’t break my keyboard after every loss.”

One time, Vi gets so worked up after losing three matches in a row that she challenges Caitlyn to a physical game of Mario Kart. You end up being the neutral referee, though you mostly just laugh as Vi leans so far into the turns she nearly falls off the couch.

6. Sweet Moments Behind the Scenes

After an exhausting stream, the three of you cuddle up on the couch. Caitlyn leans against your shoulder while Vi sprawls across both of you. Despite their competitive nature on stream, they’re both soft with you, taking turns to kiss your temple and thank you for always being there for them.

On Caitlyn’s birthday stream, you and Vi plan a surprise. Mid-stream, you burst into her room with a cake and balloons, and her normally calm demeanor breaks into pure joy. The chat floods with hearts as she pulls both of you into a hug, her headset awkwardly bumping against your face.

7. Dealing With the Drama

The three of you sit down together to discuss handling fan toxicity when it flares up. Caitlyn insists on stricter moderation rules, while Vi wants to call out every disrespectful fan by name.

“Babe, you can’t go to war with every troll,” Caitlyn tells Vi, amused.

“Watch me,” Vi responds, though she eventually agrees that focusing on the positive outweighs feeding into the negativity.

8. Fan Favorites

Fans adore how much Caitlyn and Vi clearly love you. Compilations of the three of you interacting flood YouTube and TikTok, with titles like "Cutest Streamer Trio Moments!"

Your favorite clip? The time Caitlyn leaned over to kiss Vi after a win, only for you to pop up in the background and say, “Forgetting something?” Both of them immediately pulled you into frame for kisses, and the chat exploded with comments about how lucky you all were to have each other.

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I take requests!