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artificialqueens · 3 years

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Level Up, Chapter Eleven (Branjie) - Holtzmanns

“I don’t think I could come up with anything negative about you.”

Brooke’s eyes are sincere as she says it, and Vanessa’s heart starts to beat just a little bit faster. Vanessa’s a person who’s always on the go, not one to slow down if she doesn’t have to but Brooke has the ability to make her world pause for just a second. Brooke changes Vanessa’s focus from what’s in front of her to solely her, and Vanessa almost wishes she could keep it there forever.

It’s never that hard for Vanessa to come up with words to reply with, especially not towards Brooke, but her brain feels like it has shuddered to a stop, pressing on the brakes because the small smile on Brooke’s face is more important to focus on. She could say something stupid, something funny, maybe return the sentiment but she doesn’t get a chance to decide on what to do before Yvie lets out a scoff.

“Except for your dislike of Chicken Little. That’s a negative if I’ve ever seen one.”

AN: Hi, I'm still alive, I promise. Popping back into this lovely fic nearly eight months later (a new job, a new apartment, a new city, and a new cat later too) and I love it just as much as I did in January. Eight months is good for plot to marinate and develop and I'm excited to get back to writing this fic again. If you're still around for this journey, thank you and know I'm so grateful for it. Please do tell me your thoughts if you read! Thank you writ for betaing ily <3

“So you have that interview with Glamour, I’ll set it up for some time this week, and Teen Vogue wants to do something on their Youtube channel. Who knew that was a thing? I’m working on Adidas’ rep to finagle a sponsorship outta them, and Under Armour on the backburner just in case-”

Vanessa bursts through the doors of the gym while Detox continues talking in her ear, not at all apologetic about the way that she has to interrupt her as she ambles towards Brooke’s office. “Just reached the gym. We’ll have to continue this later, ‘cause training waits for no one, right?”

“I see exactly what you’re doing, but I’m not mad at it. Go work on building those boxing skills that’ll keep lining your pockets for years. Toodles!”

Vanessa lets out a snort when Detox hangs up the phone. “Toodles? Who the hell says that?”

“Detox?” Brooke looks up from her book, an amused smile on her face. “I know that trick.”

“What trick?” Vanessa squints her eyes as she sits down, trying to read the cover of Brooke’s paperback. “Are you reading Chicken Soup for the Soul? ”

Brooke waves a hand. “Doesn’t matter. And the trick of dipping out of Detox’s phone calls. Why else would you get to the gym so early?”

“Oh, come on. I’m early sometimes. Occasionally,” Vanessa grins, and Brooke doesn’t buy it in the least from the way she raises an eyebrow. “Okay, maybe not. I like Detox, I really do, don’t get me wrong. She’s hysterical and good at her job, real good at it, but damn.”

“Detox works hard,” Brooke nods, understanding in her eyes. “It’s a lot to handle sometimes.”

“She cranks up the exposure by a million and targets it in specific places and it works, ‘cause I have a lot of followers and deals now but…”

“But what?”

Brooke leans forward, pushing her book to the side as she looks earnestly at Vanessa. It’s striking, sometimes, how Brooke gives her full attention. How much she cares sometimes.

It’s nice.

“It feels real wild, y’know? Like all I did was become a meme, and now my face is going to be in a Spotify commercial. How does that jump happen?” Vanessa shifts in her chair, letting out a sigh. “It’s only been a few weeks.”

It’s as if Vanessa is riding in a car that’s only getting faster and faster, not quite in control of the steering wheel or knowing when she’s going to be able to stop. Sure, the ride is fun, but it also feels like she’s driving without a license, as if she’s skipped the learner’s permit stage and hit the highway instead.

“She wants to capitalize on it as much as possible. Keep you in the spotlight even after the next big meme rolls around,” Brooke shrugs, before pausing for a second, a look of concern in her eyes. “It’s not too much, is it? I can always talk to Detox with you if you feel like it’s overwhelming-”

“Nah, I’ll survive,” Vanessa shrugs, giving her best reassuring smile to Brooke. “Lush sent me some free shit the other day. I like goodie bags.”

Brooke snorts. “Fair enough. Bath bombs are a reason to keep going.”

“Want some? I got enough for a month's worth of spa days.” Vanessa makes a mental note to bring some of the freebies for Brooke on their next practice. She’s earned half of everything, at least.

“You have any of the sakura ones?” Brooke is tentative with her question, and Vanessa nods enthusiastically.

“You’re getting all of ‘em.”

“Now, hold on a second-”

“It’s six. Don’t we have practice to start?” Vanessa’s up and out of the office before Brooke can protest any further. “I’m gonna go change.”

Practice is nice. Practice feels familiar amongst all the new chaos in Vanessa’s life. It lets her turn her brain off and get away from the people that recognize her out in public, the way her Instagram is now solely for sponsored posts. The way she feels like a caricature of herself, almost, because others have an opinion of who she is based on a ten second video clip.

But practice isn’t like that. In the gym, Brooke is the same as ever, pushing and pushing her until sweat is drenching her back and her mind is spinning and she feels more alive than she ever has. When Brooke throws moves at Vanessa that she has to work in overdrive to block and counter with some of her own, it’s familiar. Even though she’s tired and gasping for breath, it’s what she knows how to do, and in an environment that isn’t unsettling or foreign.

The best part about it? Vanessa can still feel herself learning. Growing. Stepping up to the challenges that Brooke throws at her. Sure, she’s not aching to get back into the competition ring anytime soon, but the approving smiles from Brooke when she gets in a good hit or when she avoids a shot that would previously knock her on the ground gives her a thrill every time.

The end of practice leaves Vanessa with a new sense of longing that’s only been present the last few weeks, since this whole meme mess has started. Leaving the gym is hard, because it means Vanessa has to go outside again, pull her hat down when passerby on the sidewalk give her a second look. She has to unlock her phone and pretend to be busy, but then she’s faced with comments pouring in on every social media account that she opens. She can text one of her friends but it’s hard to continue a conversation, really, after it starts with a rousing Miss Vanjie, no matter how much in jest.

Being outside the gym means that she’s reminded of her new loss of normalcy.

She takes her time switching back into her sweats after she showers, dragging her feet as she leaves the change room with her gym bag slung over her shoulder. When she squints her eyes she can see Brooke at the far end of the gym, teetering on a stool as she repositions one of the crooked banners. Brooke turns around almost as if she can tell Vanessa is there, a good natured smile and an easy wave following immediately.

“See you tomorrow.”

“Need any help?” Vanessa’s stalling a bit by asking, but maybe Brooke really could use a hand with the banners, or at least an extra set of eyes to make sure that they’re nice and straight.

She’s just helpful, that’s all.

Brooke, to her credit, doesn’t call Vanessa out for it as she squints, admiring her handiwork. “I think they’re as aligned as they’re ever going to be. I’m going to get ready to leave for the night, too.”

“Oh,” Vanessa doesn’t mean to sound a little disappointed as Brooke jumps off the stool, fiddling with the jacket that’s slung across her arm. “Already?”

“It’s almost eight thirty,” Brooke points out, padding past Vanessa towards her office door and grabbing her coat off of the hook. “You’re not tired and ready to go home yet?”

“I just…”

Vanessa trails off, looking down at the ground. She’s not sure what to say, really. All that’s waiting for her is her apartment, but she can’t mindlessly scroll Twitter or Instagram before bed without seeing her face again. She needs to reply to her friends’ texts, but the notifications are piling up on top of one another like a mountain that she’s not really sure how she’s going to climb.

Vanessa just wants to avoid it all.

Brooke pauses, and each second that passes makes Vanessa’s heart constrict because maybe she should just try to explain, but she doesn’t know how to and it feels like too much-

“C’mon. My roommate and I are having a late dinner and rewatching Chicken Little. Are you in for a nacho night?”

Brooke’s looking at her expectantly and Vanessa wants to say yes, but what pops out of her mouth is what’s pressing on her even more. “Did you say rewatching Chicken Little?”

“It’s a good movie!” Brooke’s defensiveness makes Vanessa crack a smile despite how restless she feels, how much she’s fidgeting while standing in place. “Come over and you’ll see.”

“Y’know, we haven’t talked about movies before, but this recommendation is making me question what your taste is like,” Vanessa lets out a giggle, when Brooke’s mock offense takes over her face as she puts a hand to her heart.

“The disrespect. You’re not getting nachos with those kinds of statements,” Brooke grabs Vanessa’s gym bag, slinging it over her shoulder as she holds the door open. “Now c’mon.”

Brooke’s apartment is not what Vanessa expects - there are colours and tapestries lining the walls and even one on the ceiling, and she’s pretty sure she sees a bong on top of the refrigerator. It’s pretty, though, with the art splashed across every free surface and the shelves filled with books upon books, piles of even more on the actual floor. Vanessa has to resist the urge to go and sit down on the wicker chair in front of the television that’s suspended from the ceiling.

“Yvie’s the one behind the decor.” Brooke has a knowing smile on her face and Vanessa can feel her cheeks heat up, from how easily Brooke can read her mind. “Moved in a few years ago after she broke up with a long term partner. Never really got around to adding things of my own to the walls.”

Vanessa snickers before she can even get her joke out properly. “What would you add? A Chicken Little poster?”

Brooke, for her part, doesn’t miss a beat. “Nah. A poster of your meme.”

“Wow-”

“I know we were thinking nachos, but picture this. Chicken nuggets while we watch Chicken Little.” A girl with bright green hair pops her head out from behind a door, waving at the two of them.

Vanessa waves back, her eyebrows lifting higher and higher on her forehead when she realizes how tall the girl is as she walks closer. Even Brooke has to look up at her which is a strange sight on its own, considering how much Brooke towers over Vanessa.

Then again, Vanessa’s used to being the short one.

“Vanessa here is doubting the movie’s genius,” Brooke raises an eyebrow, and the girl lets out a fake gasp.

“Um, not a movie. Chicken Little is a film. An artistic masterpiece.”

“Are you two the presidents of the Chicken Little fan club?” Vanessa asks, as Brooke sticks her tongue out at her.

“Yes. And no, you can’t join.”

It’s interesting how Brooke’s work demeanor has dropped now that she’s in her own apartment, her normally squared shoulders a little more relaxed. It reminds Vanessa of when they went roller skating, seeing how much fun Brooke had while pulling her around the rink.

Vanessa wants to see more of it.

Brooke points at her roommate as the girl sticks out a hand. “Ness, this is Yvie. Yvie, Vanessa. I’m coaching her.”

“You’re introducing her as if I haven’t heard you talk about her every single day for the last however many months,” Yvie drawls and Brooke’s sputter is immediate, making Vanessa’s breath hitch a little in her throat.

Brooke talks about her?

Yvie pats Brooke on the back as if she’s choking on her water rather than on some words, sticking her other hand out for Vanessa to shake. “You’re Brooke’s favourite student. Also her only student, technically, but still a favourite nonetheless.”

Brooke’s cheeks are bright pink and Vanessa can’t deny that the sight is adorable, seeing her flustered for once. Still. Brooke probably recaps their training sessions and nothing more.

“As long as it’s mostly positive,” Vanessa shrugs, and the way Brooke emphatically nods makes her feel better than she wants to admit.

“I don’t think I could come up with anything negative about you.”

“Except for your dislike of Chicken Little. That’s a negative if I’ve ever seen one.”

The platter of chicken nuggets that Yvie places on the coffee table with a flourish is impressive, to say the least. There’s a little bowl of ketchup on the side, along with sweet and sour sauce and something that looks to be...ranch?

Whatever it is, Vanessa’s nose wrinkles at the sight. “Which one of you eats ranch with chicken nuggets? Is that legal?”

Yvie’s cackle and Brooke’s flushed cheeks tell Vanessa all she needs to know as she plops down beside Brooke on the couch, nudging her side. “Really?”

“The flavour combination is great!” Brooke mutters, grabbing a chicken nugget and dipping it in the ranch for posterity, holding it up close to Vanessa’s face. “Try it.”

Vanessa scooches herself towards the edge of the couch, away from the chicken nugget and the ranch that’s slowly dripping down like a melting ice cream. “Absolutely not.”

“It’s delicious-”

“It’s cursed-”

“More for me, then,” Brooke tosses the chicken nugget into her mouth, and Vanessa’s not sure, really, how she’s handling the flavours together without puking. “You’re missing out.”

“Very happy to miss out on that, thank you very much. I’ll take the ketchup.”

It turns out that Chicken Little isn’t so bad with Yvie and Brooke peppering in commentary as they watch, and Vanessa finds herself getting swept into the plot, as ridiculous as it is. The glass of cider that Yvie’s brought for each of them is making Vanessa feel a little more relaxed, her shoulders not as stiff anymore as she leans against the back of the couch. It’s fun to watch Brooke’s face, really, and the way she lights up while quoting the movie as it plays.

Vanessa makes a mental note to invite Brooke over to watch more movies. Better movies. Expand her palate. Chicken Little cannot be at the top of Brooke’s movie pyramid, not when there are better choices available, like Pretty Woman. Sure, Vanessa’s not exactly a film connoisseur herself, but still. Anything beats Chicken Little, right?

Maybe it’s just the cider settling in, maybe it’s the full stomach of chicken nuggets, but...it’s nice. Comfortable. Vanessa pulls her feet up behind her on the couch before grabbing a throw pillow to hug on her lap, and really, she could fall asleep right where she’s sitting, even to the dulcet tones of the main chicken character screaming about an alien invasion. Brooke looks over as Vanessa settles herself more into the couch, her expression unreadable but then she reaches over the back of the couch, grabbing the throw blanket behind them.

“Wanna share? It’s kinda cold.”

It’s not cold and Vanessa knows it, she knows that Brooke does too, but Brooke’s face is soft and tentative and adorable and sharing a blanket with her would make the couch situation even more cozy.

Plus, she can cuddle with Brooke, because Brooke is tall and thus is a tall, comfortable cushion to lean against.

Brooke throws the blanket across both of them and Vanessa scoots closer to her so that their laps are covered, the fabric fuzzy and warm. The side of Vanessa’s upper thigh leans against Brooke’s and she’s not sure why she’s so hyper aware of the fact, or why Brooke’s arm across the back of the couch makes her want to snuggle in even closer.

It’s just Brooke, after all. Brooke, who’s seen her when she’s all sweaty and about to collapse on the gym floor. Brooke, who had been there at her worst after the last tournament and still wants to coach her and spend time with her. Brooke, whose secret love for Twilight will never fail to make Vanessa laugh.

If it’s just Brooke, then why is Vanessa’s heart taking flight in her chest when Brooke starts to absentmindedly trace patterns on her palm? She doesn’t know why Brooke’s touch is lighting up a pattern of sparks on her skin either, or why Brooke’s side is so comfortable to lean against. Why Vanessa almost wishes that the movie could go on forever, so that she can stay warm and safe under Brooke’s arm that’s now draped across her shoulders.

Maybe Vanessa doesn’t need answers for all of those questions, not yet, not if finding out the answers would mean disrupting the delicate balance that hangs in the air between them. Brooke shuffles a little bit and when Vanessa’s head ends up against her chest, she can feel the way Brooke’s heart is beating, surely faster than any heart should. It’s a contrast from how seemingly relaxed the rest of Brooke’s body is, how her arms around Vanessa aren’t tense, restricting, but rather grounding, pulling her down.

Leaning back against Brooke is warm, familiar. It’s a feeling of home in a situation so novel, so different from how they usually are, like pulling on a sweater that Vanessa’s not sure how she’s ever lived without. Maybe, just maybe, Vanessa doesn’t ever have to take it off.

Vanessa doesn’t realize that the credits start rolling on the screen until Yvie rolls off of the lilac armchair, reaching for the remote on the coffee table. She lets out a yawn, stretching her arms up high before shutting off the TV. “I, for one, am exhausted. And as fun as this was, it’s my bedtime.”

Brooke snickers, and Vanessa can feel the way her chest reverberates underneath her. “You and I both know you’re about to go Facetime Scarlet.”

“That’s what bedtime means,” Yvie wiggles her eyebrows, and Brooke’s noise of disgust is immediate.

“Horrifying. You two better keep it down this time. My ears still haven’t recovered from overhearing you both last week,” Brooke shudders as Yvie cackles, shutting the door to her bedroom with a click.

Vanessa turns in Brooke’s grip, shooting a questioning look. Surely Yvie can’t be louder than the average person on Facetime. “Overhearing what?”

Brooke makes a face, the haunted look in her eyes almost comedic from the way that she sighs. “Let me put it this way. Yvie and her girlfriend are in a long distance relationship, which is hard on them for a multitude of reasons. One of them being their libidos.”

“Their libidos…” Vanessa trails off, her face falling when she realizes what Brooke means. “Oh no. Not that. Tell me not that.”

“Exactly that. They’re quieter over Facetime than they are when Scarlet visits, at least. That’s a blessing.”

Vanessa shudders. Sure, she’s not exactly quiet in bed either, but the thought of people on the other side of the wall being able to hear everything is horrifying, especially because of the fact that she lives with Alexis. Her sister does not need to know details about her sex life, that’s for sure.

Still, Vanessa wonders how loud Yvie must be. “How do they even make so much noise with phone sex, anyway? Yodel?”

“Mating calls that would fit in perfectly in a National Geographic documentary,” Brooke lets out a snicker, her hand clapping over her mouth when Yvie lets out an ‘I heard that!’ from behind her bedroom door. “Still, glad I’m not about to suffer through overhearing it alone. You’ve saved my evening.”

Vanessa snorts, pulling back from Brooke’s embrace to face her, leaning against the back of the couch. “Glad to be of service.”

Brooke is softness and kindness and contentment all at once, and the easy smile on her face is one that Vanessa feels so lucky to see the longer and longer that she knows her. It’s moments like these that Vanessa wants to hold on to forever - when Brooke’s guard is down, when her posture is relaxed and she’s looking over with eyes that Vanessa could drown in. She wants to package up this version of Brooke that isn’t tethered by reminders of her past, or with upholding a legacy that defines her whether she likes it or not. At times like this, Brooke isn’t a boxer with her father’s last name, or Vanessa’s coach responsible for facilitating her success. She’s just Brooke, a girl whose gaze is so mesmerizing that makes Vanessa’s breathing hitch in her throat without even realizing it.

Brooke holds out a hand and it’s almost second nature for Vanessa to link her fingers with hers, their hands fitting together in a way that doesn’t make sense, not when Vanessa’s hands are so much smaller. But Brooke’s grip is an anchor that keeps her from floating away, one that centers her and lets her focus on the upward curve of Brooke’s lips, the softness of her eyes when she smiles.

Except then Brooke’s brow is furrowing, a hint of concern in her eyes that Vanessa wants to brush away for her. “You okay? You’re quieter than usual.”

Vanessa can feel her face heating up as she stutters, pulling her eyes away from Brooke’s face to focus on the stitching along the couch cushions. ��I’m fine. I...nothing.”

She can’t exactly go out and tell Brooke, someone who’s a coach and also a friend for that matter, that she’s just a little bit mesmerized by her face. Not something that’s likely to go over well.

Vanessa’s past relationships have been nothing short of peacocking, making herself known to those she’s had an interest in because they’d inevitably chase her right back. She knows her worth, knows how to go after what she wants, but…

What does she even want, now?

She doesn’t want Brooke, she can’t, not when Brooke is her coach and someone who’s becoming more and more important towards every aspect of her life, someone who she texts when she wakes up in the morning and who she’s messaging as she’s falling asleep.

Brooke’s not the type of person that Vanessa can parade around and go on a few dates with while drinking the cheapest wine on the menu for shits and giggles. She’s not someone that Vanessa can let go of easily, the way she’s had to with previous relationships that didn’t work out. Brooke is different from them.

She’s not disposable, not someone that Vanessa wants to let go of from her life. She isn’t someone that Vanessa can let go of at this point, because the thought of not seeing her amused expressions in the gym or the pride on her face while they’re training is too much to deal with. Vanessa’s only beginning to read through Brooke’s pages to learn more about her, and finding out little details that make her want to melt and pull Brooke just a little closer to her heart.

Brooke is too important.

Sure, Vanessa’s breath hitches in her chest whenever Brooke pulls her closer, and maybe Brooke’s smile is enough to drown out any background noise buzzing around them, but Vanessa also knows that she falls hard. And fast. She’s impulsive, following what her heart tells her to do and most of the time, she can deal with the consequences because she knows she’ll be able to get back up again.

But if this is a miscalculation? If saying something means that they’ll end up in pieces that neither of them will be able to put back together?

It’s too big of a risk. At least, for now.

Vanessa can’t be the one to take the jump off the cliff, not yet.

So she smiles, puts on the most reassuring expression that she can, hoping that it’s enough to soothe the concern that splays itself across Brooke’s features. “Really, I am. Just thinking about all the press shenanigans that Detox has lined up for me tomorrow.”

It’s enough for Brooke’s features to relax just a little bit, the smile on her face almost nostalgic. “I’m glad it’s you now, and not me, on Detox’s receiving end. She’s ruthless in the best way.”

“That’s one way to put it.”

There’s a sinking feeling in Vanessa’s chest by going for the cop out, but...she has no other choice. It’s not the way she normally handles situations like this, a fact made clear by how much she has to push down the butterflies in her stomach, and hide them behind a door so that they don’t escape and ruin stakes that feel too high, too much of a risk.

Still, Vanessa’s a bit of a sucker for punishment, and so when Brooke pulls her closer into a hug, it’s as easy as breathing to snuggle into her and rest her head against her chest, because Brooke’s arms are warm and safe and manage to slow her thinking down just a bit.

Part of Vanessa feels like she can handle it and hold herself back from doing anything stupid, if only to not mess everything up. She can be this close to Brooke and not have her chest split in two and maybe it’s a blessing, and something that she has to hold on to. Except that by leaning against Brooke, she can feel how fast Brooke’s heart is beating, threatening to escape from her chest before she can possibly stop it. It’s a contrast from the gentle way that Brooke’s fingers run through her hair, betraying the calmness on the outside that she’s trying so hard to convey.

Maybe Vanessa’s not the only one holding back. Maybe Brooke also feels it, maybe she’s also teetering on the bridge that Vanessa’s trying her best not to lose her footing on, and the thought gives Vanessa pause for a second, because maybe the risk is one they can manage, something they can work with...

No. No.

They can’t.

Not if it would lead to everything falling to pieces around them, not if it would mean no more training and no more Brooke in general. Because that’s how relationships always seem to end, don’t they?

As much as Vanessa has always wanted the romantic movie ending and a kiss in the rain, it hasn’t happened to her yet, much to her teenage self’s disappointment. There’s too much on the line to see if Brooke will be the one to veer her onto a different path and change the outcome.

So, Vanessa has to be happy with what she’s getting now, this friendship with Brooke and the coaching and accept it for all that it’s worth. Because Brooke’s important, maybe the most important person in Vanessa’s life and she has to take what she gets.

She’s lucky enough to have it in the first place, after all.

#rpdr fanfiction #vanessa vanjie mateo #brooke lynn hytes #branjie #lesbian au #boxing au #boxer au #level up #holtzmanns

16 notes · View notes

fandom-blackhole · 4 years

Note

Now that I have time and some motivation let's get down to business.

Paz also has tattoos for you,

One of your name in mando'a,

Second of the star constellation that you spotted on your trip, we love our wiccan king,

He'd 10000% be the guy to get his child's birth date tattooed,

Paz posting his precious doggo on instagram?,

Oh or Paz starting a culinary YouTube channel???,

And also showing his of the grid lifestyle?,

showing his animal rescue and promoting adoptions!,

He is buffy, handsome, funny, loves children and animals, dresses good and is the best chef, so there are many fanboys and fangirls in his comments thirsting over him,

When the comments asking if he is single get too overwhelming, he asks you to tune in for some vlogs,

You'd definitely film a mukbang video!!,

And also these crazy spicy noodle challenges,

Boba accidentally disliking all of Paz' videos?? (we are still onto tech-grandpa Boba? 😂),

You have to make sure that he doesn't post any pictures done by his hand,

He'd retweet funny clips of cats and cute pictures from Jango Investigation company's official profile,

Also him leaving embarrassing comments on your profile?

Or not knowing that there is function to dm you on instagram,

So he comments on your recent holiday trip picture ''you looked good in this swimsuit princess, shame on me I tore it apart'' or ''looking tempting babygirl, be ready, sir will be home soon'',

Din doesn't really care for sm?,

Like he used to be a casual user,

But one day people were flooding his comments and dms, spamming him with @pascalisapunk,

He noticed that you were watching youtube kids with Grogu,

(oh now I hope you will know what is going on) Grogu really likes watching cocomelon,

So Din tricked him to watching PewDiePie instead,

You don't like it tho, thinking these videos are too edgy and stupid for both of them,

''Din you've watched too many of these videos and you became a brain-rotten himbo I don't want the same to happen to our son!'',

Din and Grogu playing Minecraft together? 🥺,

Also Paz has the best town in Animal crossing for sure!,

Surprise, surprise Boba actually likes and knows how to(!!!) play Mafia game (well it's from 2002 so maybe that's why lol),

But he is the king of board games,

Especially Monopoly!!!

Also not to mention cars games,

He made you play strip poker with him 😳,

Paz and you doing a baby shower at his restaurant!!,

Imagine big daddy bear Paz with a little babygirl 😍😍😍, (Bummer that we don't have an official name for the Armorer, could be honored by Paz naming his baby after her 😭),

Grogu telling his friends at school that his daddy is also an actor lol,

Few days later bunch of 5 year olds are asking him if this is the way to the restroom, if he can bring in some hot chocolate, and doing the baby yoda batuu sound at him lol,

Poor Din, but he secretly loves it, he just loves children,

So imagine his combustion when you tell him that you are having a little Djarin 😍,

Paz helping with babyshower??,

And Boba is totally on buying you a new, bigger apartment as a gift lol,

''What, Djarin? Can't have my little nephew and favorite sister-in-law who is pregnant living in your excuse of an apartament'' lol Boba has no chill,

Grogu gets addicted to bubble tea,

And it isn't because of your introduction, you knew better not to let him drink too often,

But everyday, after coming back from the kindergarten Din and Grogu would stop by your favorite bubble tea shop,

Grogu totally wants a little brother!,

And Din is thinking about a little babygirl or better, why not both, or even better two little boys and a little girl and Grogu being their big bro 😍,

You better be ready for some intensive wrestling sessions,

You and Din have no idea why, but lately, he seems to cum A LOT MORE,

When Boba carries out the tradition you are pregnant,

Pregnant with twin boys,

And the look identical, like they were literally cloned 😉,

Boba wouldn't throw a huge babyshower,

He is too afraid after the incident involving you and the rival syndicate,

Actually Boba decided that you should move from the downtown, to live in a more low-key area,

So you are now living in a palace 😉 in the suburbs

Boba gets you a private driver and a bodyguard,

But most of the time he tries to drive you to work since you both have offices in the downtown area,

Your daily commute can get really pleasurable for both of you 😳,

Boba has his own shooting range lol, king of extra right?

One day when you were babysitting Grogu at your place you found out that Boba was teaching the kid about shooting,

You were furious,

''C'mon princess, haven't I told you about me and my father? He showed me how to use a gun when I was even younger than Grogu'',

Srsly, this man,

Giving him a death glare you take Grogu and treat him for some bubble tea

-🐣

Oh yeeesss let's get to business....

Paz's tattoos 😭😭😭 so cute (kind of reminds me of my dad, he has all of our names)

Paz totally has an Instagram dedicated to Ad'ika

Paz being thirsted after on his YouTube is so cute

But his followers also really ship the two of you, because you both are just couple goals

Paz makes you the cutest anniversary video and posts it to his YouTube

Paz is a total gamer, he absolutely loves Animal Crossing and he makes a whole section of his town dedicated to you

Paz throws the absolute cutest baby shower and anyone and everyone is invited

You both decide to wait until after the baby is born to find out the gender, and Paz has a raffle going on at the restaurant where people can guess the gender

Armorer = Amira? Amara? Andromeda??

He makes you both cute matching sweaters for your characters

Paz is the one that introduced Grogu to minecraft

Boba cause so much havoc on social media

He totally is leaving thirst comments under your pictures on Instagram not realizing everyone else can see them too

You have a Instagram set up for Fennec too because she is just so photogenic, at least when you take the pictures

I think Boba is actually pretty proficient at using Twitter, and its more or less because he uses it to stalk people 9/10

You have a tumblr where you tease and make fun of Boba, mostly posting quotes or the silly pictures that Boba takes

Boba totally dominates at any board game, but especially Monopoly

That game of strip poker did not last long at all, and you think Boba quite literally was hiding aces up his sleeves

Boba makes sure you are always thoroughly satisfied before he drops you off at work every morning

When Boba finds out you're pregnant he celebrates, and its huge

He starts going all out buying anything and everything he can/wants

When he finds out its twin boys he is over the moon

Names for the boys, Jango and Jaster? Rex and Cody??

Boba totally buys some big house outside of town, that has anything and everything you could ever ask for

It also has a panic room and state of the art safety because Boba isn't taking chances with you or the boys

Also, bringing the babysitting saga to the modern au 😭😭

You walk in on Boba handing Grogu a gun and you flip out, yelling at him

He just shrugs and you take Grogu away and say that your kids WILL N O T learn how to do any of that stuff until they are atleast teenagers

Boba pouts because you ruined his and Grogu's bonding time

When Din comes to pick up Grogu, Grogu looks him in the eye and says "cocksucker"

Din has a heart attack and Boba laughs as you yell at him asking where he heard that

Grogu says that he heard uncle Boba say it while on the phone

Din tries to follow Paz’s recipes from his YouTube, and it always turns out badly and you have to come in and save it

Din totally loves Pewdiepie's humor

Din gets frustrated with social media and ends up just making an empty account so he can follow you and watch videos, but after the whole Pedro Pascal disaster he never posts anything

Grogu and you are his profile picture though

When Grogu goes around telling the kids at school he is the mandalorian he just sighs

And when all of the kids start quoting the show, he just starts quoting them back so they will stop bothering him

When Din announced the pregnancy Paz got so excited to have another nephew/niece

Paz lets Din hold the baby shower at the restaurant and he makes all of the food, including little gender reveal cake pops

Paz gifts the two of you a photo album at has pictures of the two of you and grogu, but it is still half empty so you can add more memories of your expanding family

Boba just hands Din house keys a day says the place is paid off and he's covering the bills for the first year (he also had a nice play set built in the backyard for Grogu)

#🐣 anon #modern au #din djarin x reader #din x reader #boba fett x reader #boba x reader #paz vizsla x reader #paz x reader

23 notes · View notes

butter-egg-toast · 4 years

Text

YouTuber Girlfriend ▶️

I got a bunch of requests for this one. . 👍

Requested by @dragonwolfs

Long post be prepared.

I'm so sorry I couldn't think of Albert, Kadea, and Aii

Enjoy 🤗

Haru: 🎨

🌙You're a mix media ArtYouTuber.

🌙You do various art forms like painting sculpture, Ink art, ceramics, etc.

🌙You're usually not on Camara, most of your videos are focused on your art work.

🌙On some occasions Haru would draws something for you

🎨" Look (y/n), it's a Mackerel sculpture"-Haru

🌙 Haru gives art tips on the channel for beginners.

🎨"Art and swimming are similar...just go with the flow"-Haru

🌙He goes shopping with you for art supplies.

🎨" We literally only bought 4 items and it came to 40 dollars?!-Haru

🌙You and Haru did a couple of drawing challenges like:

Draw with left hand challenge,

Draw each other challenge

Draw with your eyes closed challenge

🌙At the end of the day Haru secretly enjoy making art with you.

🌙You have a simple following of 50k

Channel name: HoneycombArts.

Matoko: 🐱

🌙You're an animal YouTuber

🌙You work at a pet adoption center. So you encounter different types animals like:

Cats, dog, rabbits, birds, and many more

🌙You invited Matoko to help you with the feral kittens and cats; immediately after hissing at you and the other employees they warm up to Matoko.

🐱"Wow.. they really love me!"-Matoko

😸" Woah Her fur is so fuffy and pretty"-Matoko

🌙You give tips about properly taking care of animals.

🌙Matoko usually not on Camara that much (he's kinda shy)

🌙But when he is on Camara, The videos with the most views are usually with Matoko washing kittens.

🐱"You want to make sure the kitty is calm and not scared of you. Make sure you talk to them to calm them."-Makoto

🐱"Its okay little guy, you're gonna be a nice and clean kitty"-Makoto

🌙 You have a simple following 80k

Channel name: PreciousPets

Nagisa: 🎬

🌙You're a movie/TV show commentator. Comedy skits, you comment on badly movie reviews or simple commentary.

🌙You and Nagisa something reenact scenes from movies and TV shows.

🎬" Oi!!! Look at me when I'm talking to you *bad acting*" -Nagisa

🌙Nagisa cant get his lines right and he always laugh. That's what makes it charming.

🎬" Dont go...I..ummm... *laugh* I forgot (y/n) chan.. what's the line again?"-Nagisa.

🌙Sometimes there are cheesy skits you do together for fun.

🌙 there are some occasions were both of you and Nagisa forgot your lines and you both had to improv.

🎬" Noooooo... how.. could you betray me? Nagisa fell to his knees. "Well...you shouldn't have took my... taco.." trying your best to hold in your laughter. Nagisa confused at your choice of words. "Eh?..."-Nagisa

🌙He Loves being on Camara most of the time

You have a simple following 50k to 80k

Channel name: Tomatometer

Rei: 📘

🌙You're a History YouTuber. Educational videos, learning , science, and technology

🌙 You go over the latest new technology and you have sponsors that send you laptops and phones

🌙You have a mini segment were Rei goes over interesting fun science facts

📘"The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue"-Rei

📘" People who speak two languages may unconsciously shift their personalities when they switch from one language to another.

🌙 You and Rei do a myth busting, where you answer questions from viewers.

🌙There was even a time were you both performed a chemistry experiment that failed.

📘" *cough * see this is why its important to have safety precautions"-Rei

You have a simple following of 50k to 60k

Channel name: Learn Something Today

Rin: 🛠

🌙You're a DIY YouTuber, building and create easy life hacks

🌙You build random projects you find on Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest or viewers suggestion

🛠" (y/n)? That a cool sculpture"-Rin

🌙Rin is never in your videos. The only time he showed his face is when you both did a challenge together.

🛠" Woah!! This looks complicated. But nothing's too complicated for me. What do we need ,(y/n)?"-Rin

🌙Rin sometimes goes shopping with you to find your supplies.

🛠 "Huh?! This is a lot of wood (y/n), what are you making today?"-Rin

🛠" what type of wood you need?"-Rin

🌙You sometimes give away or sell your projects depending on the occasion.

🌙Rin helps with your projects on his day off, because he's curious how the project will turn out.

You have a simple following of 80k

Channel name: Fix it Make it

Souskue: 🥙

🌙You're a cooking Youtuber

🌙Sousuke something does voice overs talking about cooking traditional Japanese food and giving cooking tips.

🥙" Okonomiyaki is a simple pancake that is cook with cabbage."-Souskue

🌙People always send you emails asking to show your boyfriends face because they love his voice so much.

🥙" They really like me? I dont think my sounds like honey"-Souskue

🌙You sometimes do food challenge and completions with your friends and Souskue. (Souskue always win)

🌙You make a variety foods all over the world

🥙"Can you cook pork cutlets?"-Souskue

🌙The meals you and Souskue cook, you both give to homeless shelters and orphanages.

🌙Every special occasion you bake a themed caked.

🥙"Is that a shark?! How did you make this?!"-Sousuke

You have a simple following of 70k

Channel name: Cookie dough gummies

Momo: 🎮

🌙You're a Gaming YouTuber

🌙You play a wide variety of games like horror, dating Sims, action,Platformers, 3D, and many more

🌙Multiplayer with all your friends (Among us)

🌙Momo definitely loves playing adventures and scifi games with you

🌙Momo likes to bring Puyysuke with him to the gaming sessions.

🎮"Puyysuke is good luck!!"-Momo

🎮"Puyysuke is just as excited as I am with this game. "-Momo

🌙You and momo sometimes compete with each other in fighting and racing games.

🎮"Awwww no fair (y/n) that's cheating !!"-Momo

🎮" Ahhh how you keep winning"-Momo

You have a simple following of 60k

Channel name: Beetle juice

Seijour: 💪

🌙You're a health and fitness Youtuber

🌙Health and fitness tips from professionals and Seijour.

💪"Having a perfect form is the most important and effective way of succeeding"-Seijour

🌙Breaking down the human body to benefit different bodies types.

💪" This exercise plan I used on the samzuka swim team. I guaranteed you will bulk up👍"-Seijour

💪No pain no gain. Keep pushing YOUR ALMOST THERE!!! You can do it!!"-Seijour

🌙 You and Seijour do couples yoga on sundays.

💪"Dont worry (y/n) I got you. Just relax your muscles"-Seijour

You have a simple following 80k

Channel name: You're lifestyle

Kisumi: 💄

🌙You're a beauty YouTuber.

🌙Hes pretty much on your channel 24/7. Everyone loves the both of you.

🌙You do make up challenges, skin care tips, and themed make up looks.

💄"Niacinamide and hyaluronic acid are the best together on your skin"-Kisumi

🌙 You and kisumi have challenges where you do each other's makeup.

💄" Eh? I used the wrong color?! Haha sorry "-Kisumi

💄"I hope I'm not too rough with your face. Let me know."-Kisumi

🌙Kisumi did a voice over on one of your tutorials twice.

💄" Now shes applying blush on...oohhwow that's a cute shade on her..its really cute (y/n)"-Kisumi

💄" wow that makes (y/n) eyes pop!"-Kisumi

🌙Kisumi loves to do seasonal makeup tutorials with you.

🌙He even let you do some makeup on him.

💄" Woah I look like a kpop male idol! How did you did that??!"-Kisumi

You have a simple following of 90k

Channel name: Velvet lips

Asahi: 🔎

🌙You're a Horror theme YouTuber

🌙Discuss Mysteries and Paranormal activity all over the world, Unsolved crimes. Mysteries death and conspiracies theories

🔎"That's interesting.. has the crime been solved?"-Asahi.

🌙Asahi is not into the paranormal because he doesn't believe in it. However, because you like, he's curious about the stuff you talk about.

🔎"wow that monster is 8 foot tall!! And it was seen in Japan??!!"-Asahi

🔎" mmmhh.. that picture is kinda convincing"-Asahi

🌙There was a time where you, Asahi, Hiyori And kisumi went to explore an abandoned house on the countryside that is known for huntings

🔎"oh... (y/n) do you want me to hold your hand if your scared?"-Asahi

🔎"huh? That noise? It may have been a rat"-Asahi

You have a simple following of 70k

Channel name: Mystery XE

Ikuya:💻

🌙You're a Anmaition Youtuber, sometime you animate your story times and do little funny Anmaition, and music video Anmaition.

*The time I accidentally pranked my teacher story time*

*Middle school experience * story time

*Worst family vacation ever* story time

*Creey encounter at work ft Ikuya* story time

*How I met my boyfriend ft Ikuya* story time

🌙Ikuya something gives you ideas for a Anmaition.

💻"How about do a little mermaid Anmaition?"-Ikuya

💻"This is cute a Anmaition, you think you can teach me how to do it?-Ikuya

🌙 You created a Anmaition for Ikuyas birthday with one of his favorite songs.

💻" I love ever bit of this. You really know what I like"-Ikuya

You have a simple following 60k

Channel name: Ms.Honbuns

Natsuya: 🗺

🌙You're a travel YouTuber/Vlogger

🌙 natsuya is on your channel 24/7

🌙You and natsuya traveled to various locations while site seeing, eating food, meeting local people, learning the language, learning the history, and having fun.

🌙You do 360 VR videos of each country, or city you visit.

🌙Sometimes you both camp and go on hikes.

🗺" ah Its so calming out here in the wild"-Natsuya

🌙Natsuya has his own little segment were you taste different types of beers and wines all over the world

🗺".. woah (y/n) you have to try this. The favor is out of this wolrd!!"-Natsuya

🗺"Where do you want to go for the spring? I was thinking 🇬🇧The UK or 🇲🇽 Italy."-Natsuya

You have a simple following 90k to 1M

Channel name: Lake side view

Nao: 🍀

🌙You're a Garden YouTuber

🌙you give gardening tips

🌙on the weekends nao helps with your garden and maintaining it.

☘"Wow!! (Y/n) your vegetables looks great "-Nao

🌙You harvest and Nao cooks the Vegetables.

🍀"Wow the vegetables this harvest is delicious"-Nao

☘"Next harvest, can we plant watermelons?"-Nao

🌙Time lapse videos of Fruits and vegetables growing and decomposing.

You have a simple following of 50k

Channel name: Growful love

Hiyori: 🛍

🌙You're a Fashion YouTuber

🌙 Discuss the newest trends and unboxing new clothes, shoes and accessories .

🌙Haul videos with Hiyori (sometimes)

🛍" These sweater feels amazing"-Hiyori

🌙You and Hiyori sometimes try on matching clothes.

🛍" Wow! We're definitely a cute couple!-Hiyori

🛍"This is something I'll definitely wear every day "-Hiyori

🌙 Most of your clothes are your choice of style. And Hiyori's is more like dark academia.

🌙 Sewing clothes for you and Hiyori.

🛍"woah!! You made this for me?! Thank you so much"-Hiyori

🌙 And some occasions you guys will go thrift shopping.

You have a simple following of 60k

Channel name: Exclusive Z

45 notes · View notes

notebooknebula · 4 years

Video

youtube

Dave Seymour - Unlocking the Code to Multi Family Investing

https://www.jayconner.com/dave-seymour-unlocking-the-code-to-multi-family-investing/

Dave Seymour - Unlocking the Code to Multifamily Investing. Commercial Real Estate has some of the best overall returns out of all asset classes. Yet the majority of investors are unable to participate due to a lack of information and options. Freedom Venture Investments is breaking down the barriers to entry, giving our clients clarity and confidence, while always being results-driven. Discover how Dave went from Fire Fighter to Real Estate Investor.

https://www.Jayconner.com/trial

Get a 30 day trial to Jay Conner's Private Money Academy (May end without warning)

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Jay Conner (00:07): Well, hello there! And welcome to another episode of Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner. I’m Jay Conner. The Private Money Authority. And the host of our show. If you’re brand new to Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner, whether you’re listening in on iTunes or Google play, or following us on one of our YouTube channels or Facebook live streaming, we’re glad you’re here. If this is your first time, we talk all about different kinds of real estate. Single family houses, commercial, land deals, self storage, anything to do with real estate investing. And again, if you’re brand new, I’m known as The Private Money Authority because from 2003 to 2009, I was relying on local banks and mortgage companies to fund my deals. And I got cut off like the rest of the world did in 2008, 2009. And I learned about this wonderful world of private money.

Jay Conner (01:07): So I haven’t missed out on a deal since 2009 for not having the funding. And so if you would like to get plugged in to funding for your single family houses, I’ve got a free online training waiting for you to go to, so check it out after the show is over. Go on over to www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast. That’s JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast. And there I’ll be teaching you the five easy and quick steps from having no funding for your deals to, into the millions of funding. Again, without relying on banks or mortgage companies. Well, also here on Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner, since we launched in June of 2018, I’ve had some amazing guests here on the show, share their secrets and strategies as to what they’re doing.

Jay Conner (02:03): And today is no exception. So my guest today after 16 years as a firefighter and a paramedic, he launched his career rapidly becoming one of the nation’s top real estate investors. So within his first few years, he had transacted millions of dollars of real estate and have become one of the nation’s leading experts in both residential and commercial transactions. Well, his passion for business and real estate put him on the radar of A&E television network, as well as multiple news organizations like CBS, ABC, CNBC, Fox news, and CNN. In addition to that, the New York times reported that his series titled Flipping Boston posted the highest ratings ever for the A&E network at the time of its airing. His greatest joy comes from being a husband and a father to three boys. And so with that, I’m so excited to have your own the show with us today, Mr. Dave Seymour! So Dave, welcome to the show.

Dave Seymour (03:09): Hey Jay! How are you, man? I tell you, it’s funny. I listened to the, I listened to that intro and I’m, man, I sound pretty cool.

Jay Conner (03:15): And Scott, I will need for you to do a little edit right here because my internet has stopped working. So I’ve got a sign out and sign back in. So if you would, Scott, come to the forefront and keep Dave alive and I will be right back,

Dave Seymour (03:30): Oh, Man! I miss him already. So I got to do the show without Jay. Is that what you’re telling me, Scott?

Scott Paton (03:36): That’s right! That’s right! It’s just you and me. So,

Dave Seymour (03:39): That’s all right. It’s all good, man. I can play this game. No worries.

Scott Paton (03:45): What part of the country are you in?

Dave Seymour (03:47): Oh yeah, we’re up in Boston. Boston, Massachusetts. It’s where they threw the tea in the Harbor. We’ve been going through a little bit of a heat wave up here right now. So it’s an interesting time, man. I mean the real estate game in Boston has always been incredibly fluid and it continues to be. And I gotta be honest, man. I’m questioning some of the common sense that people use in the real estate marketplace right now. So I’m a super conservative investor.

Scott Paton (04:14): So you think people are being too aggressive?

Dave Seymour (04:17): Yeah, man! I mean, look! People sometimes forget. I mean, I listened to Jay’s intro and he had his own challenges in 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, which we all did. And you know, there were investors that folded up their tent and never came back out to play after that. And Hey man! Welcome back!

Jay Conner (04:39): I got kicked off the internet for some strange reason. And so, ever since you started talking, I haven’t heard a word, you said.

Dave Seymour (04:47): Don’t worry. Nobody listens to me, including my wife, Jay. So it’s all good, man. No worries.

Jay Conner (04:55): Scott can edit this for us anyway, but so let’s pretend like I just said welcome to the show and you picked it off from there.

Dave Seymour (05:03): All right, man. Well, I appreciate you having me on the show, Jay. Thank you for having me. It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, even with all of the chaos and the craziness going on in the world, for sure.

Jay Conner (05:13): That’s for sure, Dave. Well now I’m really curious about how you got on the A&E network and got your show started. What was it called? Flipping Boston?

Dave Seymour (05:27): Flipping Boston. Yeah. So I was listening to your intro, Jay. It was kind of interesting that you developed a new source of capital for your deals because the market kind of went sideways and I went through that same experience myself. I got, I started investing. I was a firefighter, like you said on the intro there for 16 years. But unfortunately I had the financial intelligence of a donkey and I did not, I didn’t understand capital. I didn’t understand how it worked. And I’m just following the same plan that everybody else is. And I went to a seminar to learn real estate and I’m a product of that seminar world. And the funny thing is, man, is I invested the last couple of thousand dollars that I didn’t have. Well, my wife did. I didn’t, it was her credit cards.

Dave Seymour (06:14): I was maxed out with a credit score of two. So nobody was giving me credit. But it’s kind of interesting. I did what my mentors and coaches told me, like, you know, I listened to you again at your intro, talk about the newer investors, or maybe you got some seasoned investors listening to us today, or watching us. But I just followed what worked. And next thing you know, I’ve done one deal, two deals, three deals, four deals. I’m actually doing a little teaching myself and somebody in the marketing world reached out to me and said they were looking for teams to start another show. And I was still firefighting. So I was like, firefight in 42 hours a week. And real estate invest in every other hour I was awake. And I sent in an application to New York and no offense to anybody, but I loaded it with profanity cause I wanted to make sure they paid attention to what I wrote on my little application.

Dave Seymour (07:09): Yeah. They came, they picked up the phone and the guy was kind of laughing. And he said, you’re either a lunatic or a genius. I said, is there a difference? And we started filming a little sizzle reel and we did four episodes and like you said, in the intro, their ratings were the highest they ever had for that time slot. And they said, well, people like you. And I’m like, I was just doing it for fun. I didn’t think it would ever go anywhere. And you can actually see the episodes on Amazon right now, Amazon prime in the video section. Yeah. So me and Jeff Bezos struck a deal. No, we didn’t. You can find the episodes on there. And you know, I got that reputation as an expert in the marketplace and with that comes a, you know, some really good relationships and you have to find yourself sitting on Squawk Box and Fox News and all of that silliness. So it’s kinda, it’s kinda cool, man. It was a cool journey.

Jay Conner (08:04): That is really cool! So let me give you the 30,000 foot view question and that is, why did you choose real estate for yourself?

Dave Seymour (08:13): Yeah. Look man, it’s, like I said, I was good at working, you know, and trading time for money. I’m kind of like a blue collar guy in a white collar world when it comes to that stuff, you know? I was instilled with some good solid core values, you know, don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t steal, work hard, respect your fellow man, you know, have a little faith and do the right thing. And that’s great. Don’t get me wrong, but it doesn’t give you any financial freedom because the income potential is capt. And you know, I was working construction on my days off from the firehouse and I was watching these investors like popping up. And I’m thinking to myself, hold on a second, I’m building a deck, digging a ditch. I’m sitting on a post hole Digger with a bunch of friends here and this guy’s coming in and you don’t look too sweaty and he don’t look too dirty.

Dave Seymour (09:07): He looks like he’s had himself a good old time. At his back bone aching. I think his wife is probably happy as well. Right? It was the investors. And I found myself in a position where I was losing my house, man, because I made some bad decisions. And I always knew there was money in real estate. I never understood the stock market investing in something that was imaginary. And I just went for it. I went to a seminar and my wife invested in me and I started doing what they said I should do. And the results followed afterwards. So real estate has been the biggest wealth builder in the history of animation period. And why should I reinvent the wheel? Why don’t I just learn the processes and get in the game? And that’s when I took her like a duck to water, man. I’m passionate about it. I love it. I dream about it all the time. So yeah.

Jay Conner (10:03): What year did you go to that first real estate investing seminar?

Dave Seymour (10:07): Yeah, I went in early 2000. And late 2007. Early 2008. I came out just as the crap hit the fan, man!

Jay Conner (10:21): No, I tell you, you know, here in the midst of COVID-19 reminds me somewhat of what was going on in 2008, 2009, as far as, you know, banks tightening up and et cetera. And it was a blessing in disguise for me back in 2008, 2009, because that’s when I learned about private money and when the banks cut me off within three months, I had more money at my disposal. When I went out to raise money. Than I had, when I had a line of credit at the bank And I’m experiencing somewhat the same thing going on right now. I mean, I just had a phone call last week from four guys that have a private equity fund that want to give me $5 million just to start doing business with them. Right? They called me, they called me, I didn’t call them. Right. I have someone listening to my podcast here, not too long ago. They were laid up in the hospital for three days, listening to the podcast, they call my office and they want to lend me money.

Dave Seymour (11:23): What a terrible problem to have, Jay.

Jay Conner (11:29): So, now, how quick were you able to move once you got your education and start enjoying some success?

Dave Seymour (11:34): Yeah, that’s a great question, man. You know, I’d love to tell you. You know, 30 days and it was all fixed. I mean, that would just be a flat out lie. You know wealth creation is a process. It’s not an event. For me it took me, it took me 12 months to 18 months to be what I call financially free. And what I meant by that was, was that I was able to sleep eight hours. You know, I wasn’t waking up at three o’clock in the morning, you know, riddled with fear, doubt, and insecurity. So it took some time it took a commitment and some traction. But to your point, about 2008, I mean, I was telling people, cause that’s what my mentors told me to do was to tell everybody what I was doing. And I was telling people, you know, I’m a real estate investor, I’m investing, I can buy distressed assets and you know, I can put them back on the market and I’m giving them the whole elevator pitch.

Dave Seymour (12:26): And back then a lot of people were like, Ooh, Oh, I’m so sorry that that’s what you have to do for work. Like, you know, it was like a disease that we had as real estate investors in 2008, 2009. But like you, sir, I created an opportunity out of it, I can’t, you know, I became proficient at short sales. I became profecient at loan modifications. I became proficient at private lenders. I became proficient in helping people. And I found in my career and I’m sure you’ll testify to it as well as the fact that the more time I spend helping somebody else, the better it ends up being for me, you know, that and that. I mean, you know, God is good all the time and it’s like a real good friend of mine is down in Florida right now.

Dave Seymour (13:13): And his faith is something to be admired. And he just says to me, he just says to me, David, just ask the right questions, man. Am I doing His work or my work? Right. Is it all about the almighty buck? He said, because if you find yourself just chasing the almighty buck and you’re not doing His work and taking good care of people, he said, you might find yourself facing a little bit of resistance. That’s how he puts it. And then there’d be a little bit of scripture to support it. But, you know, I love that about it. It’s like there’s nothing better than those families that we helped, you know, during the transference of wealth in this country, which is what we show in 2008, nine, 10, 11, 12, you know, to help families who were foreclosed on them and put them in a lease option. Where they could stay in the same neighborhoods, right? The kids could go to the same school. They couldn’t afford the crazy mortgages that reset, but they could afford a good decent lease option and a beautiful home to live in. And all we were doing was moving them from house to house in the same neighborhoods, you know? So you know, with some education, you can serve this stuff around pretty fast. And I’m no better than anybody else. I just did what I learned. Rather than finding excuses, I found answers. Does that make sense?

Jay Conner (14:24): It makes a lot of sense. You and I have got a lot in common, Dave, because my followers hear me say all the time, this, all the facets of the business is all about serving and helping other people, as you said, because if people didn’t have a problem, we wouldn’t have an opportunity to serve. From the buyers to the sellers, to the private lenders, you know, even when it comes to raising money. And we’re going to hear your story here shortly in the next minute or two, about how you’ve gotten into raising a lot of capitals, but, you know, I’ve never asked anybody for money. They say, Jay, how in the world are you raise all those millions of dollars without asking for money? It’s real simple. I put on my teacher cap, I teach people what private money is. I teach them what self directed IRAs are. Cause they never heard of that stuff. And, you know, the light bulbs go off. And if they’ve got investment capital or retirement funds, they’re not happy with what they’re doing. They’re going to, they’re going to want to do business with you, right?

Dave Seymour (15:24): Correct. Correct. It amazes me how many intelligent accredited investors I sit down with and communicate with. And I start giving them a breakdown of the tax advantages of using a solo, 401k as a retirement vehicle to invest in my fund, into a piece of sticks and bricks, a syndicated deal. And it’s like these light bulbs go off in their head. And I don’t know about you. You tell me this. I found that, you know, high finance on occasion, it kind of brings an air of you know, like it’s almost pretentious at times, like you’ve got this additional vocabulary than they tend to use in high finance. And I was talking to a local guy, a friend of mine, a neighbor in fact, and he’s an injury attorney, very successful. And I’m in the middle of my, you know, my conversations through teaching.

Dave Seymour (16:19): Obviously I’m raising capital with salesman. We’re good at what we do, but he’s, he stops me in the middle of it. And he says, David, David, you’ve got to stop. I go, what, he goes. I just figured out what you’re doing because I applied a logic commercial assets, you know, 60 to 150 unit apartment complexes, not just one of them, but 30, 40, 50 of them. And then I fixed them up. I get the rents up and I create a better asset. And I’m trying to give him the delivery, Jay. He says to me, David, stop it. I go, what, what what’s up? Did I offend you? He goes, no, no, no, no. He goes, I think I understand what you’re saying. He said, all you’re talking about is flipping Boston on steroids. Instead of just taking a little single family house and make it that pretty.

Dave Seymour (17:02): He said, you’re doing 5,000 units and making them pretty correct? I said, yeah, that’s right, Kevin. He said, okay, how do I subscribe? Let me see if I can get some capital into the fund, you know? And it’s amazing because it’s, you know, my trajectory, it’s interesting. We were in a marketing meeting a couple of weeks back and I had a young intern in our marketing meeting. And what we’re doing right now is we have a private equity fund and we raise capital. We invest in multifamily assets, primarily in the Gulf region of Florida, but other markets. I mean, you guys in the Carolinas in such a great position there, I mean, it’s fantastic the opportunities there. So maybe we should talk offline, Jay, but you know, these assets allow us to go in there with what’s called a core plus asset class.

Dave Seymour (17:52): What we do just like I said, we take these settings and we make them pretty, but it never was that way. I mean, the first deal I did was a $5,000 wholesale transaction on a single family home. And I felt to myself what I’d had to do in the past to make $5,000. And then when I stepped out of the attorney’s office, I’m waiting for the five votes to pull up and take me to jail. Cause I felt, it felt so bizarre to have a check for a house that I’d never owned, but I’ve learned along the way to your point to simplify it. You know, you, you lead by attraction, not by promotion. I turn away capital, Jay, because it’s not a good fit. And you know, again, the universe works in a wonderful way if it’s of service, which is, is for us because we help people with the longterm retirements. They get to invest in our fund, and they get a preferred rate of return, targeted rates of return in double digits.

Dave Seymour (18:46): And then for the life of the time that their capital was working with us, you know, then now that targeted 20% returns on their money. So it’s a, it’s a real, it’s a real good asset class. And unfortunately COVID has all, fortunately, depending on what side of the equation you choose to put yourself on. COVID has given us a massive opportunity because the buying is already there. The buying opportunities are right in front of us right now. We’re just hungry to take these assets down, help the sellers, help the tenants, help our investors. I get warmed up, man. I get on a roll. You don’t. You got to stop me and ask me questions. Otherwise I just keep going.

Jay Conner (19:23): You remind me of me when I’m on the other side of the microphone. Speaking of COVID, what’s your prediction and what’s your take on what’s the short term outlook from covid and what do you think is the longterm outlook and consequences on any front?

Dave Seymour (19:41): Yeah, it’s, you know, kind of like pull off the bandaid, man. I mean, here’s what I see. We’ve got a short term pain that we’re going to have to, we’re going to have to experience, we’re going to have to experience as a nation. We’re gonna have to experience it together. You know, depends on how you look at it. So we’ve got the full balances where the banks have, you know, allowed tenants to own us to not pay their mortgages. You’ve got a tenancy not paying their rent. We had the PPP, the protection program there for small business. You know, Mr. Trump wrote everybody a check. There’s more, you know, more capital coming out which in its essence sounds great. And it’s a difficult position, Jay. It really is because it’s like, there’s the one side of me that used to live paycheck to paycheck that understands how necessary that is.

Dave Seymour (20:44): But then there’s now the other side of me that the businessman, I look at it and I say, well, there’s no transference of services for that money. And if there isn’t a true transference of services for that capital, it’s almost like a house of cards. It’s, you know, it’s doomed to have a failure point and a stress point. And when we get there you know, we will see an increase in foreclosure. We’ll see these challenges going forward and we’ll get through. We’re America. You know, I’m an immigrant to this country. I came from England and back in 1986, I was born in London. But, you know, I, I came to the greatest country in the world for growth, for economy, for the ability to really be the best we can be. So we’re always going to overcome. So short term, I’m sorry, we’re going to have to feel the pain.

Dave Seymour (21:34): Longterm, there’ll be two kinds of people just like they were in 2008, 2009, 2010, there’ll be victims and there’ll be victors. And, you know, I sense that we will be the victors and that’s not a moral battle. It’s just an intellectual battle of finance and real estate and business. But to be on the other side of it, as a Victor, we have a greater opportunity to help the people who didn’t, who didn’t come along the journey with us on the financial side. That’s kinda my full process on it. And that’s why we’re so bullish on our buying right now, we would invest the capital because everybody else is fearful. We go in there and we just get the good buying opportunities,

Jay Conner (22:15): Take a couple of minutes and tell us in summary, your journey from, I suppose you started with single family houses, you mentioned you’re for real being a wholesale deal. And then you went into commercial and now you are in the capital raising business, and you have a fund that people can take advantage of and invest in. Tell us, give us an overview of that journey of when, what and why.

Dave Seymour (22:43): Yeah, well, we don’t have nearly enough time, Jay. I’ve always tried to say it in three words, but it always comes out in 300 for some reason. It’s like I said, man, I learned the fundamentals of real estate. First transaction was a wholesale transaction for a house I never owned and I made 5,000 bucks. And I thought to myself, if it’s legal, if it’s honest and it’s ethical, I’m not going to do this once. I’m going to do it as many times as I can. And, you know, you slowly get out of debt. And then I stopped doing a little bit of a single family. Then I’m doing a lot of single family. Then I pick up that first two family unit and then a triplex and a fourplex then I’m always like got my eye on the commercial arena.

Dave Seymour (23:26): So I was in a marketing meeting, as I was saying, and I had a young intern in there and they said, why should anybody listen to you as a fund manager with a hundred million dollars invested in commercial real estate throughout the country, primarily in the Gulf coast. Guys says you’re that flipping guy from TV. And I went, Oh, from the mouth of babes. Ok, now, man I’m 21 years old, fresh out of college came in as an internship, fresh out of the mouth of babes. And it’s interesting because I have always been involved in commercial real estate. Had a portfolio of about 110 doors at one time in Sanford, Maine, which is just North of here, you know, a C class property C class neighborhood. I learned very quickly that I just want to be the bank. I don’t want to be property manager.

Dave Seymour (24:10): So, you know, I’ve learned a lot along the way. I’ve coached people through large commercial transactions of rubbed elbows in the self storage space. I’ve always avoided office and retail. How sad is it right now for you know, leisure, office and retail investing right now? It’s a very hard time. So commercial has always been in my wheelhouse. It’s always been my excitement bottom and friend of mine by the name of Walton Evicky reached out to me, raised about 125 mil and syndicated commercial deals in multifamily assets throughout the Gulf coast. And he said, I want to bring your stop power is what he said. And I always giggle when somebody says that. He’s like, well, you’ve got a national reach. He said, why don’t we combine efforts, your team, my team let’s get together, put the fund together. So the fund is now up. We’re raising capital. We’ve got a couple of acquisitions that we’re about to take down, we’re raising a hundred million dollars, we pay, like I said, a preferred return, double digit target returns to our investors. And it’s an exciting time in the middle of all this chaos, Jay. You know, it really is.

Jay Conner (25:19): That is awesome. Thank you for giving us the overview. Now, you’ve got a free ebook for our audience and listeners. So what’s the ebook that you’re offering to everybody?

Dave Seymour (25:29): Yeah, you can see right on the screen there. FreedomVenture.com that’s our front door to our website spend a little time there. Learn a little while you’re there. Scroll down to the bottom of that page and you’ll be able to download a free ebook that I wrote with my property manager. Guy by the name of John Dessauer. He is out of Chi town, Chicago. John manages approximately 3 million square feet of multifamily real estate. He’s been an active investor himself for over 20, 25 years now. We wrote that book together. It’s called Unlocking The Code To Multifamily Investing. It’s an easy read. It’s not too heavy, but it will give you the high points and it will show why investors want to invest with us. It’s protected, you know, there’s a security there. They don’t take the the liability that most investors who were actually own the assets themselves, they own a piece of the company that owns the assets. So it’s a, it’s a smarter play big picture for a lot of investors who don’t have the time to get, to get their hands dirty like we have in their careers, Jay.

Jay Conner (26:38): That’s awesome! Well, it’s been a pleasure to have you here on the show, Dave. Final parting comments.

Dave Seymour (26:45): Yeah, just know that it’s gotta be okay. It’s gonna take us a little bit of time. And so always educate don’t speculate, right? Work on the education, understand what you’re investing in, but don’t be somebody who just analyzes all the time and doesn’t do anything. All right. Take a little action. Get off the couch and get in the game. Cause there’s the best game there is. I think.

Jay Conner (27:07): That’s great! Well, there you have it folks, Mr. Dave Seymour, again, you can follow him. Get the free ebook and also find out about investing opportunities at www.FreedomVenture.com. Thanks again, Dave. Good to have you on.

Dave Seymour (27:29): Appreciate you man. Thank you. God bless. Have a great day.

Jay Conner (27:32): All right, there, you have another show folks. I’m Jay Conner. The Private Money Authority. Wishing you all the best. Here’s to taking your real estate investing business to the next level. We’ll see you on the next show.

#Jay Conner #Private Money Lender #Real Estate Business #Real Estate #Real Estate Investing #Real Estate Investor #Real Estate Profit #The Private Money Authority

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tintinwrites · 5 years

Text

you can see me? | Poe Dameron x Ghost!Reader

A/N: This is what happens when I take a one-word prompt and write what comes to mind lol

Rating: T

Warning: Reader is a ghost. Reader’s fiance was bad.

Word count: 1,508, apparently!!

Prompt: Ghost from day six of @blackirisposts October Challenge

Summary: You’ve seen many people move in and out of your house. Poe is the one who sees you too.

GIF credit: poesddameron

-------------------------------

Eight different families had lived in your home since you died.

Your fiance lived there with a new wife and eventually a set of little twins that prompted the small family to move somewhere larger in the autumn of 1899.

A handsome couple soon moved in and welcomed a curly-headed girl two years later, and they stayed until that girl became a rebellious young woman early into the 1920's.

An older man and woman moved in to downsize after their last child became married, grandchildren visiting and growing through the years until their grandparents died; the man in 1953 and the woman in 1954.

Their youngest child moved in with her husband and two teenage children and left a couple years after they moved out, in 1962.

Newlyweds came and promptly had one child every year, filling the house to the brim until they realized they needed more space in 1968.

You were alone for two years until a group of young girlfriends decided to share the house while seeking their higher education, then went their separate ways for careers or marriage upon graduating in 1974.

Another four years alone, another pair of newlyweds who had a little boy in 1982 and a little girl in 1990; they were with you longer than anyone, but they left you like everyone else in the year of 2015.

Every family was easy to get attached to and you were sad to see them go, but you were always excited to discover who you would be with next.

You found yourself attached immediately to the man who started filling the house with boxes in 2019.

His name was Poe Dameron according to some documents you'd seen and he was your eighth family. He was very handsome and he had a laugh that you enjoyed almost as much as the laughter of the many children who had lived there over the years.

He was also kind, sure to hand out candy to neighborhood children on Halloween even though most of his boxes had yet to be unpacked.

You were watching him compliment a boy's superhero costume and generously give him a handful of candy, smiling dreamily as he shut the door and turned around.

He stared at you. "Can I ask what the hell you're doing in my house?"

You paused, slowly glancing over your shoulder and then back at him.

There was no one else for him to be talking to, but there was also no way that he knew you were there.

No one had ever known you were there. No one could see you and even when you would expend your energy to knock over a dish, they would explain it away with a tilted shelf or a breeze through a window.

"Your costume is cool, but I'm gonna have to ask you not to come into my house unannounced." The costume he was referring to was the dress that had been more appropriate for your time than his.

"You can see me?" Your tone was full of wonder and hope.

"Of course I can see you. Why don't you head out of here and we can forget all about it?"

"Oh, no, I can't. You see, I'm dead."

He had his hand on the door after opening it again, staring at you for a moment and then laughing slightly. "That's funny. I really don't want to hurt you or have to call the cops, please get out now."

You tilted your head. "But I am dead. This is my home."

"I'm sorry about this." He strode to you and moved to take hold of your arm, eyes widening as he stumbled forward and his hand went right through you.

"About what?"

Perhaps he was apologizing for the way he suddenly began trying to poke you, batting his hand through your chest experimentally. But you couldn't really feel it and he was clearly trying to prove that he hadn't imagined your incorporeal form, therefore you were more curious than offended.

He quickly stepped back, muttering to himself about something being impossible and how 'this isn't the kind of crazy you are when you have a big ego'. He covered his face with his hands for a long moment, then slowly looked at you again.

"I'm not saying I'm a hard ass who refuses to believe in ghosts and all that, but I always figured they would be invisible or something. You know, the kind of thing that makes stuff fall off of tables and that's it."

"No one has ever been able to see me...I've tried to communicate by dropping things, but it takes a lot of my energy and people consider all the other reasons why things suddenly fall."

"Okay. Cool. This is probably some weird dream or I've gone crazy for some reason."

"I promise that I am very real. I haven't talked to anyone in...over a hundred years."

There must have been something to the lilt of your voice, sounding like you could start crying and like you could shout in pure joy, that had him looking at you sympathetically. "You have a name?"

Being a spirit should have meant that you had no emotion, but you had cried many times since you died and you were tearing up right then. "Y/N Y/L/N. I've been all by myself since 1894."

"Hot damn. I can't go more than a day without talking to somebody."

"I know. You've called someone on your cell phone every day since you moved in."

"You died in 1894 and you know what a cell phone is?"

"I have been here for one hundred and twenty-five years already and the only thing I can do is watch. I have seen the introduction of the radio, the television, home phones, and computers. I have watched them all fade away and be replaced with better versions, such as flat screen TVs and computer-like phones that can fit in your pocket. I have watched television shows since the 50's and listened to the most popular music, from jazz to pop."

"You've pretty much seen everything then." If this was all in his head, he was surprised at how detailed it was.

"All I had for my entertainment were the moments those who lived here would watch television or leave a book open, and then I would read the pages over and over again until I grew bored of them. I spent every hour of every day pacing and counting cracks in the walls until you moved in."

"That sounds like hell."

"It is. I enjoy having people around here even though I couldn't talk to them...I loved watching all their children. Such innocence. Such potential."

Your eyes were sad and Poe was too, certain that there was no way even his subconscious could make up something like this.

He sat on a large box that he knew was full of stuff that could hold his weight. "Do you mind if I ask how you...how did you die?"

You looked down and he followed your line of vision to see a wound right above your chest that he might have thought had been delivered to you minutes ago if he hadn't known better.

His eyes met yours.

"My fiance was always an unkind man...I suppose I angered him too much."

"You didn't." He looked at you with meaning; it had been a long time since anyone looked at you on purpose, and you weren't sure you'd been eyed that kindly even when you were alive.

There was a knock on the door and he jumped to his feet to hand out candy to little children that seemed to be dressed up as characters from a show you didn't recognize.

He stayed up half the night to ask you questions and answer some that you had as well, him enraptured by all the things you had learned in over a hundred years and you by all he had learned in a mere thirty-four years of life.

Poe slept for a couple hours and woke early to get ready for work, momentarily surprised when you came into the bathroom while he was shaving.

You really weren't something he dreamed; you watched him very closely and then moved your hand under the stream of water in the sink.

It almost made him sad to see it go through your hand.

How many times had he taken the basic ability to touch almost whatever he wanted for granted?

You gave him privacy when he had to put on his clothes, staring out a window and walking into the living room as you heard the door shut and his key turn the lock. Yet you could still hear voices.

Looking around, you discovered that he left the television on the home and garden channel. You then noticed that there were a bunch of books on the floor, near the now half-empty box he'd been sitting on last night.

Every single one of them was open to the first page.

#poe dameron imagine #poe dameron x reader #bipspoopy19 #star wars imagine

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shibyn · 5 years

Text

are you blushing or is that sunburn

haikyuu!! | bokuto/kuroo | 23k | ao3

"Wuh?" Bokuto only looks slightly perplexed, munching down on his popsicle in thought. "If we can't do it this week, we can just do it next, right?" He says, like it's the most obvious thing in the whole universe, the only possible answer. A bead of melted popsicle runs down the wooden stick, spilling across Bokuto's fingers. He awkwardly gurgles, unmelted ice still in his mouth, and he tries his best to lick the trail and proceeds to knock himself in the forehead with the ice pop.

It's. Endearing, maybe, if not completely embarrassing to watch.

Ahh, Kuroo thinks and averts his eyes. His neck is warm under the sun.

It's the hottest day of the year.

And so was the day before, and the day before that.

(A summer romance where things get a little too hot and spicy— literally. Tokyo’s melting.)

"—temperatures are soaring, paired up with cloudless skies. Take care these next couple of days, and stay hydrated! A cold front is on the way, so sweat it out, there's relief coming soon!—" Blearily, Kuroo wipes the sweat collecting beneath his eyes, glancing away from the TV that's been playing as white noise as he waits. It's early morning, windows wide open to the city waking. Outside the air is muggy and hot and he would love nothing more than to close the windows and crank up the air conditioning, but he's gotta be mindful of the AC or the bill will skyrocket. First day of summer break and it's already abysmally hot, he laments, sinking further into the couch. The pleather of the couch is grossly sticky whenever it peels from his bare shoulders. It's gonna be one helluva long day. "Tetsurou!!" The front door swings open without warning, slamming against the wall and bouncing back, striking the intruder. Not even deterred aside from a sharp yowch, and only momentarily pausing to kick off his shoes, Bokuto comes romping in through the entryway. Every bit of his stride looks like he can just barely contain the energy he has. He almost strides right past the living room, double taking when he notices Kuroo. "Wha— Tetsu, are you not ready!" Rising from his sprawl on the couch, Kuroo says, "I am ready, you airhead, you just took your time getting here. It's, what—" a quick glance to the clock— "—ten thirty? You're late, buddy." "By just fifteen minutes!" Bokuto whines, shoulders slumping, "I forgot the tickets the first time I left my house so I had to run back to get them!!" "You—" but of course. What else was he expecting? He did make their meet time thirty minutes earlier than necessary— just in case Bokuto forgot something. And another thing. And then something else. "How far out were you when you turned around?" "Halfway through the station!" he announces, bouncing on his toes, awfully chipper for how sweaty he is, "I think that was the fastest I've ever sprinted home." He's got his puppy-dog grin, but he is breathing a little heavier, his shirt damp in dots along his chest. "You didn't have to," Kuroo says, grimacing. Maybe he should've said that they had plenty of time— even if they ended up being late, so what? He literally incorporated the wiggle room for a reason. Coulda saved him the trouble. "I coulda paid for us up front." Aghast, Bokuto digs at his pocket and nearly punches Kuroo in the nose he presents his hand so fast. Clutched in his hand are two brightly colored tickets, a holographic sheen to them with the shifting light. The smallest sliver of a tanuki's face peeks out from where it's covered by his thumb. "Never! I've been holding onto these babies for so long, it'd be horrible if I let them go to waste!!" Kuroo snorts, smacking his hand away. "For months, man. You won them at a raffle at what? The club fair this year? They're about to expire." "Well!" Bokuto retracts his hand, haphazardly shoving the tickets into his pocket. Kuroo tries very hard not the wince when he sees them fold wrong when they go in. "I wanted to wait for the perfect time! All the rides are open now, and it's summer break! Ideal time!" "It's gonna be packed as hell." "Yeah? It's all the more people to see how terrified you'll be on the Exterminator." Bokuto grins. There's a challenge in his voice. Of course. Wouldn't be Bokuto if there wasn't a challenge. Kuroo scoffs. Wouldn't be him if he didn't step up to the challenge. Or at least egg him on. "You wish. You'll be the one holding on to me, scared outta your mind." "Whoever closes their eyes first on a ride loses!" In either to set the deal or to pull him to his feet, Bokuto extends his hand to him. Clicking off the weather channel, Kuroo, knowing his grin is taking up most of his face, takes Bokuto's hand and pulls himself to his feet. His palms are sweaty but his grip is still firm, stabilizing. "Lets get going, then." — Both of them lose. Neither of them really knows who lost first, per se. The Exterminator, the tallest ride that the park has to offer, towers near the entrance which, of course, they beelined to once they stepped in. On the first unsuspected drop, they had grabbed ahold of each other, screaming, eyes screwed shut. Their eyes stayed shut the remainder of the ride, the force of the wind too strong for them to even pry them. The ride was long over by the time they even thought about it. (Though— Now that Kuroo thinks about it, they never really agreed to what would happen if they lost.) Since they've both technically failed already, they do not hold back. On the ride that shoots the cart backwards, they're holding onto each other for dear life, hollering. On the tower drop they're grasping each others arms, screeching and laughing, dropping, then again and again. Every time they get off a ride Kuroo's bangs have been blasted back from his forehead and Bokuto's hair is slowly and eventually coming loose of its gel. Its almost ritual now to laugh about it unnecessarily hard for five minutes, pointing at Kuroo's cowlicks and Bokuto's willowy hair. Everyone else in the park probably hates them, but who gives a shit. They're having the time of their lives. Though it takes more than half the day, they dwindle through the lengthy list of rollercoasters at the park: Mt. Everest, American Eagle, Storm Runner, Steel Dragon, Fury, the Manta Ray... They even go through the crummy water-log-ride that's more of a musical show than a ride, lined with animatronic tanukis and flowers and rainbows and shit. It's the best ride yet. Even though they don't know the words, they sing along the whole time. The day's mostly gone by the time they slump down on a bench, one that happens to have the tracks of a ride twisting overhead, rumbling with the oncoming cart of screeching passengers. Kuroo's slouched across the entire length of the bench, back against Bokuto's shoulder, absently sipping at the icee in his hand that'll probably dissolve his teeth in due time. Bokuto, on the other hand, is scratching off furiously on a flimsy map splayed across his knees. "I think that's all of them!" Bokuto beams, chewing on his straw. He draws two thick lines in a green sharpie marker over Tanuki Timbers Forge Ride, gleefully humming its little jingle. Kuroo turns his head to peer at the map. There's something very satisfying about seeing every ride crossed out, conquered by the two of them— there quite literally isn't a place on the map they haven't crossed out. "Well, except there's still the restaurants we could go to," Bokuto continues, pointing with the capped end of the sharpie to Tanuki Tavern, a medieval-themed food stop, and Derby Hall, where there's apparently incredible chicken wings. "I mean, the only thing that's worth getting is this hell drink," Kuroo says, lifting his icee as indication. Truly, there isn't really anything special about the icee— aside from being so obscenely sugar boosted, its gotta be against FDA— but the cup that it comes in is a tanuki head. He's getting sick of tanukis at this point having seen them all damn day, but it's pretty funny since he got the cherry icee flavor and it looks like he's slurping up tanuki brains. (It's honestly lost all humor value now that he literally feels his teeth fading away in his gums. A funny cup in exchange for his teeth...) Bokuto shrugs, folding up the map. His icee is practically gone already even though Kuroo didn't see him drink from it. What the fuck. His hands are too steady, too. Did he actually drink it...? "I don't think either my wallet or yours would appreciate it if we went anywhere else, anyways!" "Then all we would have left is the gift shop. Buuut..." Clicking his tongue in mock annoyance, Kuroo pulls the bill of Bokuto's new hat down until it covers his eyes. Bokuto squawks, swinging at him. "We've already been in the gift shop since somebody haaad to cover up his hair..." "I couldn't just let the world see my hair when it's down! They're not ready for that," he whines, pulling the bill up. Wisps of his hair peak out from the back. Kuroo successfully suppresses the need to tuck them underneath the hat. I wasn't ready, either, Kuroo thinks airily, then feels very stupid. The cheeky little winking tanuki embroidered on the hat seems to be smirking at him. Fucker. "The gift shop's the last place you're meant to go at a theme park," Kuroo continues, pointedly looking away from that stupid tanuki. "But since we've already been, we can just go and leave." "Wait!" Perking up, Bokuto pops the lid off his icee and downs the rest in one go. Kuroo feels his insides shrivel just from watching. Bokuto drags a hand across his mouth, grinning, "There's actually one more thing! We passed it on the way to the Exterminator so we didn't get to appreciate it in its full glory! It's right by the entrance, too, so it's perfect! C'mon!" And then they finally reach it— the Holy Grail. Unreasonably tall, stationed in its own little pond, ridiculously cheesy; the statue of the park's mascot. Tammy Tanuki. It's meant to be grand, he's sure, but— but he just can't take it seriously now that he's not ten years old. A big ole bobble-headed cartoon tanuki in some mock power-ranger outfit, waving like its calling kids into the park, a cheeky 'follow me!'. The jets of water arcing around the metal structure have apparently been misaligned over the years, because now a stream hits the Tanuki straight into its open waving palm. There's silence for a note as the two of them revere before it. Kuroo waits expectantly. "I'm gonna get a coin on its head," Bokuto says abruptly, a fire igniting in his eyes. Christ, he's got his volleyball face on. "I'm gonna get it on its nose," he changes, striding to the railing with way too much determination, leaving Kuroo to try not to fall over wheezing. It takes a whole moment for him to gather himself to be able to trail after Bokuto. To rest his elbows on the rails He has to nearly bend in half, but he does so anyway, eyes creased in residual laughter, watching Bokuto dig in his pockets for coins. "Why the nose? You're gonna waste all of your money trying to make it," he says, because while he fuckin' loves the enthusiasm, he's gotta make sure Bokuto doesn't end up completely broke. "It's special!" Bokuto says, scandalized. He digs in every single one of his pockets, back, front, shirt, jacket. Pats himself loudly on the ass, as if that'll help him find coins. "Everyone just tosses it into the water! Wouldn't it, like, up how many years of luck I get if I get it in a cool place?" Kuroo snorts. "Or it might make Tammy Tanuki extra pissed at you. Isn't it throwing the coin into the water what makes your wish come true, or whatever it is? Landing it in some sick place on Tammy wouldn't count." "It would so count! Tammy would appreciate my skills." With a bright 'aha!', Bokuto pulls coins from the funky little coin pocket in the front of his pants. He unfurls his palm, and in it are nine measly coins. On closer inspection, Kuroo chokes on his laughter. They're not even yen. They're arcade coins. Bokuto looks a little heart broken, lips wobbly. "I was gonna use these the next time I went..." he mourns. "How long have they been in that pocket?" Kuroo asks, his voice hitching too high. Flushing in something close to embarrassment, Bokuto quickly counts and recounts. "That doesn't matter! What matters is that I'm gonna fuckin' land these trick shots!" He holds them out to Kuroo, who easily lends his palm for the coins to be dumped onto. He tosses one of the coins into the air a couple of times like he's getting a feel for the weight. Kuroo rests his chin in the palm of his unoccupied hand. "Ya sure you even want to do this, Bo? What if Tammy thinks you're disrespecting 'em by throwing some crummy aluminum coin at it? Not even in the water, too," he says languidly. Now that there's no real threat of Bokuto going to go broke money wise, there's no real need to dissuade him. But it's fun to do so anyways.

"Tammy loves me!" Bokuto hollers. He winds his arm back like he's a baseball player about to throw the ball of the century, and he just. Chucks the coin. Both of them watch as it streaks across the air, pings hollowly against the tanuki's forehead, and plops straight into the water below. A long moment of stunned silence settles. Kuroo whistles. "I'm surprised you even hit it." Bokuto gasps. "No faith! You have no faith in me!" He scoops another coin from Kuroo's palm, nearly sending all of them clattering to the pavement. "I have faith in the fact you're not gonna have any money after this." Instead of retorting loudly like he usually would, Bokuto grumbles something suspiciously sounding like 'thats not true', which sends Kuroo into a peel of obnoxious laughter. He chucks the coin again in a fit. It flies right over the entire statue, and Kuroo has to hold himself upright with the rails to keep from collapsing. Like the seconds passing, the amount of coins in Kuroo's hand dwindles. Within the span of six coins, Bokuto's changed tactics, now tossing rather than throwing, and he's gotten closer and closer to the tanuki's head, more-less its nose. When the eighth coin hits Tammy's eye and slides sadly into the pond, Kuroo hands Bokuto the final coin as a passing of rite. "Final one, Bo, make it count," Kuroo grins cheekily, raising a fist in a cheer. "It always counts!" Bokuto says, pinching it from Kuroo's fingers. Clutching the coin in his palm like he's channeling all of his energy into it, Bokuto pops his eyes open— when'd he even close them, Kuroo wonders absently— and, with his new strategy of throwing underhand, swings his arm back, and tosses. Maybe because it's the last one, but it seems so much more dramatic, the coin glimmering in the sunlight. There's no spin to it from what Kuroo can see in that split second, Bokuto's gotten crazy good at tossing in such a small amount of time— and for a brief second, he thinks this is the one. It lands solidly on the tanuki's head, the metal resounding like a gong, and it slides straight down the middle of its forehead. His breath catches and Bokuto goes ramrod straight, lurching forward and grasping the rails as if he's going to leap over them, and they both watch as it slides, slides, and reaches the nose— —and teeters right off, flipping as it drops to the water. Bokuto screams. Kuroo folds over in laughter. A mother hurries her child past them, pointedly not looking at them. "What the fuck! It was there!!" Bokuto screeches, leaning almost completely over the rail like he's yelling at the statue. Kuroo has to grab the back of his shirt before he joins the coins in the pond. "I was so close!! This isn't fair!" It takes a hot second for Kuroo to manage a breath to speak. "It technically counts," he placates, laughter still trickling in his voice, "It did get to the nose." "But it fell off! It doesn't count like that..." he whines, finally wilting from all of his yelling. He slouches against the rails. "I was so close..." A pause, then Kuroo finds golden eyes peering up at him. "Unless..." "Nope." Kuroo makes an X with his arms. "Not a chance. I'm not letting you make me go broke too." "But—! I was so close that time!! I could definitely do it if I had another chance! And with actual money—!" "Nuh-uh. This is how people develop gambling addictions, Bo." "Gambling's the only addiction that pays back!" "And that is where we end this conversation," Kuroo says loudly, ignoring Bokuto's indignant squawk. If he were here, Akaashi would obliterate Bokuto for such a statement in his quiet, judging kind of way. He actually shivers, fearful. He stoops to scoop up his icee that he'd set down, pointedly about to leave, but Bokuto clings to his arm, all hundred-eighty-centimeters of him weighing him in place. "One more! Just one more! And I promise that I'll stop! Even if it doesn't get in! I'll even pay you back!" Bokuto pleads, literally throwing all his cards on to the table. From the look that's in his eyes, he's going promise his first born at this rate. And— well. He can never say no to Bokuto. Kuroo sighs loud and deliberate. Bokuto perks up. Like a dog perking its ears. Goddammit. "Just one?" He asks, unrelenting. "Just this one," Bokuto reassures, unbelievably starry-eyed. Dude looks like he could catch the sun he's so determined. Even though Kuroo knows he'll keep his word, he keeps his eyebrows raised in challenge. Bokuto stubbornly does not crumble under the scrutiny. Then he sighs again, reaching for his pocket. "Lemme check if I actually have one—" "TETSUROU," Bokuto wails, louder than loud, christ, if people weren't looking at them suspiciously before, they sure as hell are now. If his face turns bright pink, he blames it on the stupid sun with its stupid UV rays. He doesn't quite fumble with the coin as he pulls it from his pocket, but there's a weird jerk in his motions, embarrassingly. It's a five-hundred yen. Yowch. "If you miss, you gotta buy me that shitty ice cream that's the shape of Tammy's head," he barters. "I was gonna do that anyways!" Bokuto cheers and snatches the coin, outshining the sun behind him. — "... Impressive," Akaashi says, eyebrows raising as excited hollering nearly blows out the phone's speaker. The screams last seconds too long, and he lowers the phone once he's realized the rest of the video's nothing but screaming. He slides the phone back to Kuroo. "I'm surprised he even made it." "Both of you have no faith in me!" Throwing his hands up, Bokuto slouches in the booth as far as humanly possible. "Of course I could get it! I'm thatskilled." "You missed the first nine times," Kuroo reminds, taking a long sip of his smoothie. Bokuto stills. "Well, yeah, I was figuring it out! Warming up!" He flounders. "If Kuro didn't give you his money, you wouldn't've made it," Kenma says around his straw and Bokuto deflates even more until he's practically a popped balloon on top of the table. Not even glancing once at him, Akaashi scoots his plate of food away from Bokuto's slump, out of collateral damage, in an almost practiced manner. Kuroo leans back till his head touches the booth, laughing. The four of them are tucked at a table next to a window, which is luckily situated in the path of the air conditioner. Bokuto had rallied them all here despite the crummy heat, claiming that they had to meet up, he's got a plan. Kuroo's only slightly worried of what that plan might be, since the last 'plan' involved raiding Karasuno's gym during practice. (It was a general consensus that one was shot down before it took flight. He doesn't even want to think of the wrath Sawamura would deal upon them.) Kuroo glances at Akaashi, measuring his expression: there's no tell-tale furrow to his brow, no slight scowl... He's just steadily picking away at his fries, nodding as Bokuto laments. Okay. That's good. Knowing Bokuto, he's probably spilt his plan to Akaashi before hand, so seeing that Akaashi specifically does not look conflicted means it's not too wild of a plan. That, or he simply hasn't said anything to Akaashi yet. Yipes. "Sooo," Bokuto begins, grinning. He even does a drum roll on the table, to which Kenma straight up glares at and Akaashi looks like he does not associate with anyone at the table. "Let's go to the beach!" "The... beach," Kenma repeats, deadpan. Kuroo chokes on his sip and spends the next minute trying not to die. None of them even try to thump him on the back, more-less glance at him to make sure he's not dying. Bastards. "The beach!" Bokuto repeats, leaning in, his chest nearly flat against the table. His eyes glimmer with a near tangible excitement. "Let's find a couple of days where we can go! Or it can even be just a day trip where'd we leave in the morning and spend the whole day there! I already looked, and the train ride wouldn't be too horrible, and I know where some public beaches are!" Kuroo raises his eyebrows, surprised. "You've really done your research this time, huh, Bo." "You betcha! There's no better time then now! And— We gotta play beach volleyball! If it's us four, I'm pretty sure that's more than enough to play!" Instantaneously, Kenma's face twists up into a scowl. "I'm not going to play volleyball. I'm not." "Kenmaaa!" "I'm not." Slouching into his seat, Kenma looks as resolute as he possibly can, even with his bright pink drink clasped in his hands. "It's going to be exhausting. You'll want to play too many matches, too, and that on top of the sun sounds awful." He slouches further until his chin and mouth disappears under the neck of his hoodie. End of input. Just before Bokuto can badger him more, Akaashi cuts in. "He's right, though," Akaashi says neutrally. Purposefully pauses to eat a fry. "What kind of 'relaxing break' would it be if we're going to be playing volleyball? We'd be doing the same thing if we stayed here." "But it's on the beach!" "My point didn't change." Like he's been shot, Bokuto slumps against the table. Presses his cheek on the cool surface, pouty as hell. "Do you just not wanna go to the beach...? Is that it...?" he asks more to the table than to Akaashi. Akaashi flicks his eyes to Bokuto then back to his fries. "It's going to be packed. And hot. I'd rather go during autumn." "But that's the point," he whines. "The hot sands, the blazing sun, the hot babes..." Clicking his tongue distastefully, Kenma redirects his attention to his phone. "'Knew there was an ulterior motive." And he drops the conversation with that one simple move. Once again, Kuroo chokes on his drink. Fuck, he needs to stop doing that— "C'mon! I mean!" Bokuto rises up, slamming his hands on the table and nearly sends a fork flying. "We'd be showin' off our stuff while we play! There's gotta be someone who'd be impressed! Anyone who'd think we're cool!" "I don't think it's necessary to try and look cool, Bokuto-san." While he speaks, Akaashi reorganizes the scattered cutlery, his motions very obviously a distraction from making eye contact. Kuroo salutes him in his thoughts. Even the strongest may fall to Bokuto's puppy-eyed look. "Regardless. I'm not keen on heat stroke. There's no sanctuary in hot water that's packed with people. I'd probably wouldn't go even if you said we wouldn't play volleyball, it's just not the right season for it." "But..." Bokuto flounders. Actually droops. Poor dude looks like all of his dreams have been crushed right in front of his eyes and its crumbly remnants scattered to the wind. Right around now, Kuroo decides he's finally had his fill of letting Kenma and Akaashi rip into his silly plans, and pats Bokuto's knuckles. "It's alright, big guy," he says, not quite keeping the grin from his voice, "I'm down to go. When are ya free?" And, he sees Kenma briefly roll his eyes into oblivion, Akaashi wince and brace. By some miraculous force, Bokuto does not quite burst at the seams, but comes very close to. — [Bokuto 10:22 A.M.] TETSU COME OUT FRONT DOoR NOW !!! ! It takes him a couple minutes to actually read the message, still groggy. He's been awake for the better part of an hour, but he's been too lethargic, soaking in his sweaty bed. Blegh. Even with all the covers kicked off into a pile at the end of his bed, he's still sweating profusely. The little portable fan he's got set up on his side table is cranked to its highest setting, too! This is bullshit, he thinks, closing his eyes and breathing slow, if he thinks I'm gonna go outside in this heat, this early... It's a little foreboding, that message. A little suspicious. Bokuto has no limits, and that will not change today. Even if he were to ignore the message, it would not stop him. Bokuto Koutarou is a force to be reckoned with. So he rolls out of bed. Wriggling on a pair of pants blindly grabbed from the floor, he clunkily makes his way down the stairs. He supposes it's a little miracle his mother isn't around to experience whatever Bokuto's got in store, or to even tease him about how this is the earliest he's ever been up during the break. Then she'd invite Bokuto inside for breakfast, regardless of whatever's waiting outside the door for him. Christ, she might even invite disaster inside. Have it sit at the table and hand it a plate of eggs. When he steps into the foyer, he can hear no immediately horrendous noises coming from outside, which actually does narrow down the options of why in the hell he's been called out of his house. Still doesn't reduce the amount of disaster that may occur, but at least it probably won't bother the neighbors. He puts a little steel in his spine and opens the door. Something golden, small, and very fast darts towards his knees and the next thing he knows he is flat on his ass, completely plowed over by what he belatedly realizes is a dog. All the air's knocked outta his lungs and he doesn't even get the chance to recover, especially when there's suddenly dog tongue all over his face. "Shit!" He thinks he hears the gods laughing at him. Bastards. Somewhere behind his obscured view of dog, Bokuto peers over him, face pinched apologetically, "Sorry, Tetsu! She got really excited and tore herself from my grip..." There's a sharp tug and the dog is pried of the top of him, finally letting him breathe. Since Kuroo's chemical makeup is one-hundred percent asshole, instead of asking why do you have a dog since as of three seconds ago he was very sure Bokuto didn't own one, or even pulling himself up from his current sprawl on the floor first, he says, "Should you really be walking a dog if you can't even hold on to the leash?" Bokuto rocks back on his heels, a corgi squirming in his hands as it tries to lick his chin, gaping at Kuroo like he's been hit. "I'm a little hurt. Should I be hurt? Actually, yeah, I am. Y'know what, just for saying that, Petunia, get him." Without warning, he releases the dog. "Petunia—?" Kuroo doesn't even get time to be boggled. With the force of a canon ball, the corgi crashes head first into his stomach again, maybe bruising some of his ribs. His fate doesn't look too well, so he resigns to it and eases back onto the floor, letting the dog lick his cheeks and forehead to its hearts content. Halfheartedly he pushes the dog's face from his, staring up to the ceiling. "You... named your dog Petunia?" he asks. Petunia's ears perk up and she briefly pulls away, looking down to him as if waiting for a command. After a half second of nothing, she returns to her original plan of cleaning his face for him. From his peripheral he sees Bokuto move and resettle next to him, feels his knee pressing into his side. "I don't have a dog?" Kuroo looks pointedly at Petunia who is slobbering all over the front of his shirt. "OH!" Rather than helping him, Bokuto reaches out and gives Petunia a hearty rub on the head. Petunia licks his hand like a greeting. A fond look lingers in Bokuto's eyes and Kuroo tries not to ogle for too long. "Petunia's not my dog, she's my neighbors! Ya know the lil granny next door? She asked me to take care of her dog for a while since her son isn't around to do it, he's on a trip or something, and she's got bad knees 'n all..." "God, I was gonna say what kinda bullshit—" he throws an arm over his eyes, nudging Petunia away. Finally she seems to get the memo and bounds to over Bokuto. "There's no way you wouldn't name your dog something silly if given the chance," Kuroo says. Bokuto has the audacity to look mildly offended, opening his mouth to retaliate, and halts. Closes his mouth. Pouts. "Touché," squinting his eyes, Bokuto huffs. "I think Petunia is a fine name, thank you very much!" "Never said it wasn't," he counters, then pulls himself up. "Just not one I'd think you'd go for. Maybe something like Soup." Looking up in thought, Bokuto nods like he's seriously considering it. "Hmm! Soup! Not bad! I was gonna go for something like Chad, or..." "Chad?" "It's fun!" "I don't think I could ever look at your dog and not lose it if you named it Chad." Bokuto gasps dramatically. "How could you! It's a lovely name!" Leaning down, he bonks his forehead with Petunia's, getting almost face-to-face with her. Well. About as face-to-face he can get with such an antsy dog. "Petunia, don't you think it's a good name?" Petunia, such a darling, hops up and tries licking his nose. He laughs, though it'd probably be more correct to call it a giggle, scratching beneath the dog's jaw. "Yeah! I know! It's brilliant!" Although he could sit here for hours, just watching Bokuto mess with this little corgi, laugh softer but just as bright, they are currently just sitting in his doorway with the door open, the heat crawling in. He can hear the phantom voice of his mom scolding him, Tetsurou, what the fuck, close the goddamn door, do you even know how much of the heat is coming in? "I'm guessing you didn't just bring her here to show her off, right?" Kuroo says pointedly. Both of them look up at him, eyes all sparkly 'n shit. Dammit, he thinks, squinting, it's already enough of a bright morning. "I thought about just going on a jog and taking her along, and I was, actually!" Bokuto says, lolling his head back to look up at the ceiling. Kuroo takes the moment to actually glance at his clothes— shorts, his usual kneepads, loose shirt. There's a very slight sheen of sweat on his arms and neck. "Then I passed your house and thought, hey, why don't I get Tetsurou?" "You woke me up to go jogging with you?" "With me and Petunia!" he reiterates, lifting Petunia up slightly like he's presenting her. Her tail wags with the force of typhoon winds and audibly smacks against Bokuto's bicep. Now. He has two options. Option one: go with Bokuto and sweat his ass off outside. Option two: don't go with Bokuto, get his persistent, moping messages, and sweat his ass off inside. Both options are gross and sweaty. Obviously. Obviously. Kuroo literally has to keep himself from grinning too too wide, reaching over to prod at the fleshy part of Bokuto's side. "Ya convinced me. Lemme change first. Help yourself to the freezer if you want." Bokuto cheers and, by extension of excitement, Petunia howls with him. — The teenager with sugar-pink hair at the ice cream stand greets them by name. Almost even has their usual order ready for them by the time they step up. To change things up, Kuroo gets a fudge pop. Dunno why— maybe it's just a chocolate kind of day. Bokuto hmms and haas in contemplation for five minutes. Familiar with his antics, the sugar-pink teenager lets him take his time. A queue of children has formed behind him, but none of them are putting up a fit— some of them even give him their input. ("The sonic one tastes more like blueberries!", "Strawberry's my favorite! Get that one!!") In the end Bokuto still gets his usual absurdly bright popsicle, a fluorescent-neon blue so obscenely blue it absorbs all surrounding light, though he's mopey whenever he leaves the stand. "It's not like we don't come here all the time," Kuroo drawls, almost done with his by the time Bokuto comes shoulder-to-shoulder with him. He didn't think it was possible to be this put out by ice cream choices, but this may be the saddest he's seen Bokuto ever since his last funk in a volleyball match. "But... but..." Almost glumly, Bokuto pulls the wrapper off and takes a bite. Never has he looked so unenthusiastic about his electric-blue pop before. "I wanted to get Bubbles..." Kuroo points his fudge pop at him accusingly. "You just wanted to see how fucked up her face could get." "Well, yeah!" Shocked, like he's surprised Kuroo has the audacity to state the obvious. "They're always funny! The last one I got didn't even have eyes!" "I remember that, yeah." The poor Bubbles pop not only was missing the whites of her eyes, but her pigtails had ended up in her cheeks. He's not entirely sure why the two of them had found it so funny in the moment, but they sure as hell did. Both of them had nearly collapsed onto the pavement from how much they howled with laughter— he's pretty sure a couple of bystanders thought they were on drugs or dying. He grins fondly. "Besides, I always end up getting this one!" Bokuto whines, his teeth already turning blue, "I mean, I like this one, but the Bubbles has its own kinda vibe to it, y'know? The chaotic energy of the fuck-up that's doomed for it and the gumballs for eyes. Love that crunch." Kuroo grins, exasperated, the remnants of the popsicle stick between his teeth. "I have no clue what you're talking about, man." In no particular rush, they meander along the sidewalk. Beside them, the river glitters with the sun's reflection, only blinding Kuroo whenever Bokuto's accidentally a small step behind to block out the glare. They're at the riverside that's caught somewhere between both their homes, not too horrible a walk from either to be an inconvenience. Whenever they have time to hang, they come around here. "So!" Bokuto beams once he's made a significant dent in his popsicle, fist pumped up in the air. With a plop, a small chunk of his popsicle flings onto the pavement. The lack of reaction from him is either him not noticing or not letting it get to him. "The beach!" "The beach," Kuroo nods. "This Wednesday." "This Wednesday!" Bokuto crows, excitement exponentially growing with each passing second. "I finally got some air into my volleyball, so we can use it when we go!" Bokuto says. He pats his bag where there's a very obvious volleyball-sized bulge. Of course he brought it along with him. Of course. "Though, I think there's a specific kind of volleyball we're meant to use at the beach? Er... because it... floats? Doesn't hurt as much when you spike it?" "That's just a beach ball, y'know, the inflatable red-blue-yellow balls?" Kuroo motions with his hand although he's not exactly sure what he's trying to gesture. "Not really specific for beach volleyball. Some people use it. They're inflatable, though. We— well, you might accidentally pop it if we use one." Gasping, Bokuto swipes at him. "What! I would not!!" Kuroo raises his eyebrows. "You nearly popped a regular volleyball with your super-inner-deluxe-crosses. An inflatable one would be vanquished in a single hit from you, you volleyball beast. We'd probably be playing with people who aren't volleyball players, too— Imagine the collateral damage. I don't think I'm ready to see you actually shatter someone's arm," he says drily. Grimacing, Bokuto surprisingly does not counter his point. "See, if Akaashi and Kenma were to come, we wouldn't have to worry..." he murmurs through the side of his mouth. Not quite bitter. Maybe edging on bitter. Maybe he's a little bit more hurt by their immediate refusal of the plan that Kuroo initially thought. "Nah, I think it might be for the better," Kuroo says flippantly. Cocking an eyebrow, Bokuto just gives him a look. "Well. Yeah, I mean, them not coming means we have no setters or braincells with us, but that means we have all the more freedom to do whatever we want," he points out, like he's revealing a hidden secret. "Also. Even if Kenma came with us, he woulda stayed underneath an umbrella the whole time, playin' on his gameboy. Completely invalidates the reason of going to the beach." Humming considerately, with his chin between his thumb and finger, Bokuto actually perks up, dawning on the possibilities. "Yer right. 'Kaashi's too nice, so he would keep Kenma company, so then regardless..." "Bingo," grinning, Kuroo pats him heavily on the shoulder. "So now that they're not coming— we literally have nothing stopping us!" "Do you think we can rent surfboards?" Honest to god, Bokuto twinkles he's so damn excited with the idea. "I've never surfed before! We could go surfing!" Kuroo has to bite down very hard on his tongue to keep from immediately saying let's do it. "I mean. Just because our residential braincells won't be there doesn't mean we should go do wacky shit that may end up with one of us drowned. 'Kaashi would skin me." "What are ya talkin' about? We can totally get someone to teach us!" "I think it just might be better to test the waters, yeah?" A little overwhelmed by the enthusiasm, Kuroo backtracks. "Next time we go to the beach we can surf. First we gotta make sure we can make it without a disaster playing volleyball there. Or accidentally wiping out some old grandma if the wind fucks with us whenever we're playing." Which reminds him— "Ah, shit. Wait a fuckin'—" Kuroo nearly drops both his phone with how quickly he pulls it from his pocket. Currently occupied with a bite of ice, Bokuto just peers curiously at him. He scrolls through the calendar he's got on his phone almost desperately, spotting Wednesday and the date— "Shit. I can't make it this week," he mutters, a scowl pulling at his face. Scratches at his cheek to keep it from cutting too deep. Dammit, how the hell did he forget? "My gram's birthday is this Tuesday. Ma's been designated as party host, and..." He cranes his head back and groans at the sky. "Fucking hell. My whole extended family's gonna be here for like, three days! I can't believe I forgot." "You forgot your grandma's birthday?" Bokuto says, scandalized. Even covers his mouth in a shocked gasp, like he's some horrified maiden from the eighteenth century hearing something uncouth. Dramatic asshole. "What a horrible grandson!" "Hey, I don't want to hear anything, you barely remember your own," Kuroo snipes back, punctuating with the popsicle stick. Bokuto shrugs, beaming. Not a damn care in the world. "I always have you to remember for me, anyways! I at least remember my granny's. Unlike someone here..." Kuroo snorts. "Bastard," he says, elbowing Bokuto, which consequently nearly sends the popsicle flying from his hands. "I wish I could just bail, but I know my mom would give me shit for the next decade if I did." Eyebrows shooting up, Bokuto smacks his arm both, maybe in retaliation, maybe not. Maybe he's shocked? "Dude! Our beach trip isn't that important, you shouldn't skip out on family just to hang with me! Your mom'll give me shit, too, if I let you come along!" "I see your true motive, you bastard. You just want my mom to like you enough to let you steal shit from our fridge," he accuses. Bokuto has the gall to not look ashamed of being found out. "Anyways, you're a helluva lot more fun to be around, y'know?" Kuroo continues, tipping his head back, back until he can't go further. He feels a little bare, talking like this. About this. "You don't ask me about the college I'm gonna go to or how I'm still single. Is that just an old person thing? To snoop in my life?" Gnawing on the popsicle stick, he shoves his phone back into his pocket begrudgingly. "Plus, you wanted to go this week. You've already gotten everything ready, right? We shouldn't have to push it off because I forgot about a family reunion." "Wuh?" Bokuto only looks slightly perplexed. He bites down on his popsicle in thought. "If we can't do it this week, we can just do it next, right?" He says around his bite, like it's the most obvious thing in the whole universe, the only possible answer. A bead of melted popsicle runs down the wooden stick, spilling across Bokuto's fingers. He awkwardly gurgles, unmelted ice still in his mouth, and he tries his best to lick the trail and proceeds to knock himself in the forehead with the ice pop. It's. Endearing, maybe, if not completely embarrassing to watch. Ahh, Kuroo thinks and averts his eyes. His neck is warm under the sun. "Alright, then," Kuroo says, rubbing at the back of his neck, "Same time next week? I swear I won't get wrapped up in anything." The grin Bokuto has rivals the sun above them. "I'm holding you to that! You're gonna buy me a Bubbles pop if you skip out!!" — "Man, is the AC even on?" Yamamoto knocks his head against the wall after collapsing against it. There's a pause as he inhales half his waterbottle. "I'm. I'm melting." "It's on," Shibayama says though he doesn't sound all too convinced, even though he's planted directly in front of the airflow. He and Inuoka look like they'd like to crawl into the AC unit since maybe that would be cooler. Kenma lays nearby, almost dead. "It sure doesn't feel like it's on," Kenma says into the floor. Kuroo reaches down and pulls on the back of his shirt. The noise of his shirt peeling off his back is, quite frankly, really gross. "C'mon— get up, you're gonna become a puddle there." "I might." "No, you're not," Yaku swoops in, forcing a water bottle into his hands. When Kenma doesn't move immediately Yaku threatens, "I'm not going to force you to drink if you don't move, but I'm going to force you to drink if you don't move." Immediately Kenma moves. "Don't." "Can we end practice early?" Lev cries from his place sprawled out on the floor. Fumbling with his water bottle, Kuroo watches as Haiba Lev, residential skyscraper and airhead of Nekoma, tips the bottle back and accidentally waterboards himself. Kuroo presses his mouth into a thin line, trying to keep his expression unchanging. From beside him, Yaku's turned away, shoulders shaking. Kuroo glances towards the clock. It's not too far into practice, maybe forty minutes. Usually by this type they're all raring to go, just getting started into their groove, but as he looks around, there's unmistakable sheen of sweat already layered on the floorboards and everyone's moving so sluggishly. Even at training camp they're not this exhausted, not even on the final days. "If you don't mind going home in this heat right now, I can talk to coach about it," he offers. Lev's face twists like he's tasting something nasty. "Neither sound good," Lev says hoarsely, using his shirt as a rag to wipe off his face. His face is just as damp as it was before when he pulls his shirt away. He groans. "I can't even wipe off my face! My shirt's already too sweaty to even absorb it! I think my face just got more wet..." Yaku's eyebrows raise like he cannot even fathom. "So you just smeared all of your sweat onto your face?" "That's fucking gross, dude," Yamamoto laughs, more amused than disgusted. "It's just sweat! It's natural!" Lev screeches, growing embarrassed, flushing even more under his skin. "I was already sweating on my face!" Teshiro, an angel, gives Lev a towel to save himself. As Lev scrubs at his face, Teshiro looks towards Kuroo, curious. "Would it even be wise to end practice today? It's meant to get hotter this week, then we'll have to practice in that since we'd've stopped this one." "Hotter?" Lev blurts, jerking the towel from his face to gape. Even though he just toweled off his face, the sweat just reappears. "It's already hotter than the sun! It can't get hotter than this!" "That's what a heatwave does, dumbass," Yaku grumbles. "Are you even from Tokyo? It's like this every summer." He nudges Lev's thigh not unkindly, but sharp enough to get him moving. "C'mon, nothing gets to ya, but some shitty weather does?" Although hesitantly, Kuroo calls for break. No one audibly protests, but he sees it in the dragging of feet, the slant of shoulders. At least they're good sports about it. Except for Lev. He'll have to check with Nekomata about calling practice over early today. — If he were an asshole, he could say 'I told you so!' and point and laugh. But he's not an asshole. He's nice. So he says: "Dude, you look like a cherry." Bokuto shoots him what's possibly the sharpest frown he's ever seen on him. It should be threatening since Bokuto has never given him such a stink eye, but the skin on his face is bright pink and there is no way on the planet he can take him seriously like this. The smile that threatens to split across his face almost slips by him, so he has to press a hand to his mouth to keep it from growing. Though he can try, there's no way he can keep the amusement from the tail of his words. "How in the hell did this happen?" Parked on a stool in the bathroom, Bokuto fidgets with his shirt in his hands, borderline embarrassed. His back is open for the viewing, the tanned expanse of it abruptly changing to an angry pink in clean lines at each of his shoulders and a wide scoop on his nape, along with a small gradation on the small of his back from where his shirt probably rode up. With how the sunburn's nearly glowing it's so bright, he's surprised it isn't audibly sizzling. "That's the thing," Bokuto rocks back in his seat, miserable, "I didn't even do anything! Well, not on purpose, but..." he flings his hands up in exasperation, nearly tossing the shirt with the motion. "I was just playin' with some of the kids next door, since their dad had to go get food for dinner— I wasn't even out there that long!" "So, due to the kindness in your heart, you've... fried, for a lack of better words," Kuroo snorts. There's no other word to describe the way his skin is radiating heat. If he was out there for any longer, Kuroo's worried his skin would have started blistering and boiling. Unsurprisingly, the heatwave's been unyielding. Bokuto blinks. Gasps with his whole chest. "Oh god, I hope they didn't get as burned as I did—! It was so fucking hot earlier—" He straightens up and for a second Kuroo's pretty sure he's going to leap to his feet and sprint to their house, just to make sure they're alright, up in arms with bottles and bottles of aloe vera. "They probably didn't," he quickly intercedes, almost reaching out for Bokuto's shoulders to guide him back to the stool but deflects his motion last second. There's no place on his shoulders that's not burnt, and he's not physically or mentally prepared to face the reaction if he were to even touch the sensitive burns. Unaware of his brief dilemma, Bokuto peers up to him, puppy-eyed, unsure, jittery. Kuroo sighs through his nose. "They probably didn't burn. Since... well, I'm assuming you went out to get the mail or something and the dad roped you into watching them while he went out, right?" "Right!" he nods enthusiastically. "So they were probably already planning to play outside," he points out, "hence, they probably had sunscreen on already. Unlike you, who didn't plan on staying out there aside from getting the mail." Bokuto ahhs in understanding, settling back into his seat. "Makes sense!" He leans back, back until he touches the cool wall behind him. A wince scrunches up his face but he relaxes once the initial pain of the sunburn fades from the chill. "I just wasn't expecting to scorch like I did. I've been outside for longer and never got burned! I really did get screwed over today, huh! Does a heatwave also mean that UV rays get stronger?" "Maybe," Kuroo shrugs solemnly. He himself feels the heat of a sunburn growing on the back of his neck, tips of his ears— he was outside for, how long? A couple of minutes to the station, then couple to walk here? It's probably an actual miracle Bokuto didn't straight up get sun poisoning. He enters the bathroom a little more, resting against the counter with his arms crossed. "So. You didn't just call me over just so I could laugh at you, right?" A pout pulls at his face. It's more of a subdued pout— probably because it hurts to be expressionate with burns that bad. He looks very sheepish for a moment, and Kuroo honestly cannot tell if his face just got pinker or not. He moves to rub his neck and immediately pulls away once he touches it, making a face. "I... I needed someone to put the aloe stuff on the spots I can't reach..." The acoustics of the bathroom amplifies Kuroo's laughter to a deafening note. He doesn't mean to laugh this hard, he swears, but it's just so— so cute of him. "You—" he wipes under his eye, getting dangerously close to straight up giggling. Bokuto's coiled up like a spring, pouting, embarrassed. "—couldn't you get your mom to help you? or your dad?" "It's! It's embarrassing!" he whines, throwing his shirt at Kuroo's face. "And besides, they're out for the day! And I mean—!!" "Why not Akaashi? He lives closer than I do!" "I didn't want to bother him!" "So you wanted to bother me?" He guesses Bokuto doesn't catch the amused lilt in his voice because guilt flashes across his face. The tension bleeds from him until he's slouching. "'Kaashi woulda lectured me on being more cautious," he slumps against his knees, staring at the tiles on the floor, "I knew you woulda just laughed and, like, told me to be careful, but I wouldn't feel as ridiculous as I would've felt if it were Akaashi..." Abruptly, he straightens up. "Not that I don't appreciate his fretting! I know it's kinda weird, so, I, uh..." Ahh. He gets that. He wonders if Kenma feels like that whenever he scolds him for staying up late and playing video games. Then again, Kenma's not a soft-hearted beefcake— he honestly probably doesn't give a shit about what Kuroo says, seeing that he still does it. Kuroo just waves off the worry. "Nah, I get it. It's a little less embarrassing since the worst I'll do is poke fun at you. Where's the Banana Boat stuff?" "Under the sink," Bokuto says automatically, then freezes. And, like a dawning sun, his expression brightens. "Bro...?" Kuroo's knees crack when he crouches down to the sink cabinets. Deep in the corner, past an unfathomable stock of hair gel, is the soothing lotion. "I'm already here, so I might as well," he shrugs, grin growing alongside Bokuto's. (As if. Even if Bokuto was forthright whenever he messaged him under the guise of 'tetsu pls its URGENT', he'd still come over and help.) (Whipped.) "Tetsuuu," he cries, reaching out like he wants to tackle him in a hug but physically cannot. "You're an absolute lifesaver, man! I can do my arms just fine, I just can't reach my back..." "I mean, it's just the nape of your neck. A little below it. You can't reach that?" Kuroo asks, stepping around Bokuto and taking a seat on the tub's edge. In a near habitual motion, like they've done this before, Bokuto immediately leans back and slots right between Kuroo's knees. He pointedly does not think anything of it, not at all, and chalks it up as it's easier for me to reach this way. He does not think about how warm Bokuto's skin is, even if it's not the sunburnt parts. Not even about how Bokuto tips his head back, nearly knocking the crown of his head into Kuroo's nose, how the smile curves his eyes from this angle. Not at all. Nope. Shirking, Bokuto shakes his head, the motion pulling Kuroo from inside his head. "My shoulders are tender since, y'know, they're crispy." To show, he raises his arm as high as it can go without making him strain— which, understandably, isn't very high. Maybe high enough to pluck something off a low hanging shelf. "And I'm not flexible at all! Even if I was able to move my arms more, I don't think I can reach it? I don't... really know how far it goes down, I can't really see it. And I can't really feel it out..." "It starts riiiight here." Kuroo presses the pad of his finger shy of where the pink starts, right above where his shoulder blades meet. Immediately he feels and sees every part of Bokuto tense up, ridged. It startles a laugh from him and he retracts his finger, and like an off switch, Bokuto slumps back down. "Dude," Bokuto laughs with his belly, the sound taking up the entire space of the room. He misses by a wide berth when he swings around to smack him. "You gotta gimme some kinda warning! That scared the shit outta me!" The muscles in his back dance as he straightens up, rolling his shoulders, and, frankly, it's a little distracting. Kuroo takes to looking at the soft hair curling at his nape instead. Which doesn't help. Shit. "Well, this is rather intimate," he says right over his inner turmoil because he is a man of composure, he cannot, will not, let this be where he loses it. "Ya sure you're not squeamish enough for me to do this?" Bracing, Bokuto says, "I'm ready for whatever you've got for me!" "Then I'll be sure to slather you up," he says lowly, squirting the aloe into his palm. The pump sputters, making a weird goopy noise, and his whole ambience of being even slightly risqué is ruined instantly. Whole bodied, Bokuto shivers. Laugh reaching squeaky, he twists around, planting a palm on Kuroo's face and shoving. "Dude. I'm literally a french fry right now. A fuckin' hush-puppy! No innuendos, please, it really hurts to smile like this! Keep it tame!!" Kuroo's nearly too entranced by the pitch of the laugh that he forgets himself and nearly flips backwards into the tub. "What! That's what I do best, though!" "Banana Boat just isn't sexy enough, Tetsu!" "Yeah, yeah, sure," he says, and without warning, smears the lotion across Bokuto's neck. Bokuto shrieks. "I said warn me!!" "Oops." — "I could kill you," Kenma grumbles, impatiently tucking his hair behind his ears. It slides right back out from behind his ear, damp with sweat. The entirety of him sags, like he's about to melt into a puddle on the pavement. "I could really kill you right now." It's easy to pretend he doesn't see the smoldering glare he's being given. He's dealt with it for... how many years now? Shrugging it off is just as easy as swiping a bug off his skin. "The gym has air conditioning. C'mon, we're already halfway there." He specifically does not say anything about how both of them and every person under the sun knows the gym's AC is shitty at best. And at least twelve teenage boys crammed in front of it? It can't even be called cooling at that point. Kenma huffs. He shifts his gym bag in a restless motion, pulling at his shirt. "Why are we practicing in this hell weather," he grumbles, "I'm already exhausted. I want to go home." "We've been let off the hook a whole lot recently— we gotta at least actually get some practice in instead of just calling it a day after warm ups." "No." "Yes, we have to." "No," he gripes. His hands flutter around again, pushing back his hair, readjusting his bag, fanning with his shirt. "We are going to be perfectly fine if we miss out on practice because of a heatwave. There's no matches in forever. We can practice when it's not hotter than satan's ass outside." "Sure, but then we'll have missed out chances to level up. You want to go against Hinata at your best, don't you?" From his peripheral, he sees Kenma straighten up. He grins. Hook, line, sinker. Kenma scrunches his nose and swings a hand at Kuroo's gut. "I hate you." "Do not." "I'm not doing this. I do. I'm about to die in my own sweat and other teenage boys sweat and it's going to suck. I could be at home right now. I'm out here, going to die in this shitty heatwave, because of you." "It's just sweat. You're already sweaty," Kuroo points out, "so it's just sweat on top of sweat." "And? you think I want to get even more sweaty? Bold of you," Kenma seethes, shoving the gym doors open with more force than necessary. Entering the gym feels like entering a goddamn sauna, and practice hasn't even started yet. Kuroo mourns in advanced. He's glad this is one of the practices they do without Nekomata around— he's not sure if it'd be alright for the old man to move in this temperature. "Ah, Kenma!" Lev cries from inside the locker room, somehow still excitable in this oven of a gym. "Don't come near me," Kenma seethes before disappearing behind the locker room doors. Kuroo tilts his head back. Breathes in deeply. This is going to fucking suck. Twenty minutes into practice they've had four breaks. The breaks so far have consisted of refilling and refilling their bottles they've been drained so fast. Also a lot of laying around. Sweaty imprints are spotted across the floorboards from where they've laid. They're almost like chalk outlines for bodies. The analogy feels a little morbid. Frankly, at this rate, they'll have laid around more than done any substantial practice. He thought that the AC coulda helped somewhat in the slightest— he probably should have known it's practically useless after it reaches a certain temperature outside. On the fifth break, Lev loses it. "Wait, wait, wait," Lev whines, clutching the spout with a desperation, "I thought global warming would get us all in thirty years! Why is it happening now?! Heatwaves just aren't like this!!" "Move, you big idiot," Yaku grits, giving Lev a hard shove that doesn't result in much, seeing how Lev is quite literally wrapped around the spout. There's a real chance of bodily harm that Lev does not seem to realize yet. "It's just a heatwave, dumbass. There's no way its global warming— imagine the kinda crap we woulda have to have done to cut the expectancy by thirty, to make the temperatures that bad." Lev shoves back. Why is he putting up a fight. Why did he think it was okay to wrap himself around the spigot, Kuroo wonders, briefly considering using his power as captain to get him the fuck off. He wants his damn water. He's going to become horrifically dehydrated from sweating, standing right here. "Its not that hard to believe! Seeing what corporations can do, if they all just said screw it, the ozone layer could be gone in a snap! The greenhouse effect could go into tenfold with their word!" Kai swoops in to refill his bottle when Yaku solidly plants his foot on Lev's gut, which, surprisingly, unsurprisingly, leads to a scuffle. "It's only this prefecture," Kai cuts into Lev's hysteria, sounding not in the least worried, though he's sweat covered and already going for another refill he just drank all of it so fast. What a saint. "I have relatives in Hyougo and they've said it's not like this there." "But that's also Hyougo, which is, like, far away!" "Very eloquent of you, Lev." "Why here?" Finally, Lev peels away from the faucet, falling away with Yaku's foot in his gut. He flops straight back onto the pavement and nearly gets trampled now that the water's free again. "Ow—! How— how could global warming just get concentrated in one area? That doesn't make sense!" "It's not global warming," Kenma says absently. There's a flurry of emoticons on his phone screen that can only come from one Hinata Shouyo. He shoves the device into his pocket once he notices the cheeky curve of Kuroo's eyes. "It's kind of like a monsoon that's just moving slow. But instead of rain, it's heat." "But what coulda even made this kind of thing happen? I've never heard of anything like that," Inuoka wonders aloud. The absolute god-send, he helps Lev from the ground where he probably would've stayed. "Supernatural," Fukunaga pops in sagely, wiggling his fingers in his strange emphasis. Lev and Inuoka collectively scrunch their faces up, unbelieving. Kenma shrugs. "At this rate it doesn't seem that far-fetched." "It's just a test of willpower, ain't it?" Taketora says, squirting the water from his bottle with such force it actually makes him choke when it hits a certain spot in the back of his throat. From beside him, Kenma makes such a face at the word willpower and the gurgling. "The more resilient we are in this kind of heat, the better we'll be in matches, right?" Smiling politely but with an exasperation around the edges, Kai says, "I'm not sure what kind of conditioning this would even be. I doubt we'll have any matches in this kind of heat." Because he's so nice and also the captain, he lets everyone else on the team refill their waters first. Finally, finally, he can refill his. Kuroo feels a century-old weariness when he finally takes an endless gulp. "Let's just call it off for today," he decides. —

"—clocking in at 39 degrees, it's officially the hottest day in Tokyo this summer! There's a sparing amount of clouds out today, but don't rely on them for cover. Take precaution going outside today, drink plenty of water—"

Pulling at the neck of his shirt, Kuroo tries to lend his ear more, but the broadcast's cutting out. Behind the counter the store attendant curses, flicking at the radio which looks a little too archaic to even been working in the first place. It reaches static before the spokesperson's voice becomes somewhat comprehensible again, the tinniness of the radio nearly drowning out every word.

From somewhere deeper in the store he can hear Bokuto still humming about which drink to choose. They took a pitstop here both because they were thirsty and because they may just have turned to mush if they stayed outside any longer. The broadcaster sounds a little too chipper about the damn heat than she needs to be.

Asshole. She's probably in some lovely air-conditioned building, unbothered by this bullshit. He's out here in this crummy store with the only form of relief coming from a rickety fan on the counter.

Ugh. Uuughhh.

Something very, very cold touches his neck. The noise he lets out is too high pitched, something he would love to say didn't come from him, but sadly, unfortunately, it does. Whirling around, he snatches the bottle from Bokuto's hands, who's face is so scrunched up to keep from laughing it's practically a raisin.

"Ha-ha, very funny," Kuroo says blandly, jabbing at Bokuto's side with the bottle. Bokuto screeches.

"You jumped! You actually jumped!" He's laughing too hard to even try and fight back. Each jab he gets to the side he shrieks at, folding in more on himself until he's basically crouched over. Kuroo decides to spare him for a moment to let him breathe. "You jumped, like, two feet in the air! Like a cat!" Comically, Bokuto gasps even louder. Unfolds like a dry sponge getting a splash of water. "Like a CAT! DUDE—"

"Don't say it."

"NEKOMA—"

Kuroo smothers Bokuto before his volume can amp up even more. "Understood, you've made this joke a billion times, alma mater cats, I'm basically a cat, yeah, yeah," he mocks. Bokuto's eyes crease up and he's laughing again, against Kuroo's hand, which is a weird feeling, so he peels it off before it gets weirder. "I can't believe you still find those kind of jokes funny. Bird brain."

"Excuse you, but owls are the smartest creature out there!" Bokuto puffs up like he's personally proud of it.

"They're literally not." Kuroo pokes his tongue out at the abashed gasp. "Crows have you beat. Even pigeons are smarter than owls."

The look of pure hurt on his face is hysterical. He actually goes through a facial adventure, which touches upon rage, grief, confusion, betrayal— before he just mutters: "Fuckin' Karasuno..."

Snorting hard enough it hurts, Kuroo puts a hand on Bokuto's shoulder to steer him out of the store. The second they step out, it's like walking into a different world, a different universe. He might be imagining it, but Kuroo feels the sweat immediately grow on his spine and soak through his shirt. Gross. Bokuto grumbles something deep. Wipes the sweat from under his eyes. They power on.

Maybe three minutes out in the heat and all energy they had earlier has sapped out of them and dissipated into the atmosphere. He thinks he saw it go with the heat coming from the pavement.

He is basically half his height he is sagging from the heat so much. Each step he takes the more he wilts. Perhaps not all that strangely, he can relate to the foliage they're passing, a grim shade of brown instead of their usual green. He, too, feels like he's withering at the edges. Overheating, dehydrated, about to set ablaze from the sun rays. In the false kinship he feels in the moment, he briefly considers sharing some water with the plants. Then he realizes that's stupid. Ridiculously stupid. There is not enough for both him and every single willowing plant out here.

"It's hot," Bokuto says, tone flat for once. When Kuroo glances over, his face is so scrunched up in a grimace so intensely Kuroo's momentarily scared it won't come off his face. "It's hot."

"Bo, if you keep talking about it, you'll only be more aware of it," Kuroo grits, lacking bite. The water bottle's already losing its blissfully cold condensation. He presses it to the back of his neck anyway— anything feels like a blessing against the sun.

"Te-tsu-rou!" Bokuto bursts, gesturing wildly, almost knocking Kuroo's elbow. It's a miracle he can even move this animatedly in this hellish beatdown. "I'm sweating my entire weight, man! I can feel the sweat between my toes! It might be pooling in my shoe—"

Grimacing, Kuroo presses the water bottle to the side of his face. The chill of the bottle seeps into his skin, an immediate comfort. He rolls it up his cheek, trying to sap out every degree of chilliness. Beads of condensation run down his face and he can feel it evaporating right off of his skin. "Wanna try camping out in a konbini until it gets cooler?"

"Nah, man, we're already so close to your place," Bokuto says, though he looks like he'd rather do nothing but exactly that. What an absolute trooper. "It's only gonna get hotter the longer we wait, right? Unless we stay till night, which like, defeats the whole purpose."

Kuroo, however, is not as strong willed as Bokuto. If he wasn't here, Kuroo would stop at every damn store to keep from being outside for longer than thirty seconds. But he is here. So he resigns himself to Bokuto's reasoning.

It is going to be a long walk.

Almost twenty-five minutes later and six stops for breathers along the way, they spill into his house, practically falling over each other once the door gives way. Near immediately Bokuto slings his bag onto the floor, punts his shoes off, but hesitates when he grabs the hem of his shirt. "Is your mom home?" he asks meekly.

Kuroo makes a face at his shoelaces, boggled. "What? I don't think she is."

"Cool." And in one fluid motion, his shirt comes flying off. He lets out a long yell that audibly comes from deep within his gut. "Aaaaugh! It's HOOOT!" Dragging his feet and his shirt, Bokuto moves sluggishly further into the house, specifically towards the kitchen. There's a loud thump and then what sounds like a body slumping onto the floor. Then a long wail. Slowly, it tapers, until it is no more.

Peering around the corner Kuroo finds that Bokuto had clipped his hip on the kitchen counter and unfortunately has passed away. He nudges the body with his foot when he passes. The body stiffens. "You alright there?"

With his face squished against the floor it's a little impossible to truly understand what is said, but Bokuto probably says: "I think this floor might be the best thing I've ever felt."

Snorting, he jabs his foot into Bokuto's side just to be an asshole. Tugging open the fridge door, he almost collapses against it, more than willing to just sit here and soak the chill in. He allows himself to be selfish for four seconds. Four seconds seem so, so short, but if he allows any more than that, he may not move away, so he quickly acquires a cold bottle of water.

"Holy fuck." Suddenly Bokuto's voice sounds a helluva lot clearer. He's peeled himself from the floor, now resting on his forearms, eyes pinpointed on the fridge like he's a predator locked on prey. "That feels fucking awesome."

"What, the breeze?" Kuroo jokes. Moves to close the fridge door.

Almost like a crazed animal, Bokuto scuttles— there just ain't another word to describe it— across the floor, planting himself directly in front of the fridges contents to purposefully prevent the door from being closed. Immediately, he sags, sighing, blissful.

A little befuddled, Kuroo laughs, bubbling. Bokuto's entire thigh is resting on his foot. "Dude?"

Bokuto simply reaches over and pats the spot next to him.

Kuroo's a simple man. Really. He allows himself a delegated amount of time to be selfish to be polite, to not be greedy. But this is an invite. So he goes. Sinking to his ass, he scoots closer and closer till his shoulder aligns beside Bokuto's and the edge of the door.

They probably look like idiots. They most definitely look like idiots. Both of them are sitting in front of the fridge's open door like they're starving, but instead of food, its the sweet bliss of chilly air. Sitting too close to each other to be even slightly comfortable, especially with how sweaty they are, but it's physically impossible to move from the sweet, sweet cold air.

Bokuto's right, though. It feels fucking awesome.

"My mom will kill us if we keep doing this," Kuroo says airly. Simply saying it to say it. With no conviction he grabs the door handle as if to close it, but with both of their bodies in the way, it doesn't go further than pressing into his own thigh. He slumps against it instead.

Bokuto hums. He looks one step away from crawling straight into the fridge, the shelves and food be damned. Anything to lower his body temperature.

Neither of them move.

As much as Kuroo himself would love to stay here, now that he's actually mentioned his mother he's very aware that she will commit murder if she sees this. It takes nearly all of his perseverance to roll out of the fridge's way, now slumping against it so it would close. Unmoving, Bokuto only grunts when it hits him. Kuroo leans harder. No budge.

"Bro."

"Dude."

Kuroo presses his cheek against the door edge. It's blissfully cold. The sunburn on his cheeks feels like it's healing right up. "C'mon. You gotta move. I do not have the power to stop my mom."

Every single muscle in Bokuto's arms and back visibly tense up. It's been a track record recently, how much he's seen Bokuto shirtless. What, is he becoming the new Karasuno's Number 5? Allergic-to-wearing-shirts? "I can't. It's too nice," he near whispers, strained, like he's caught between a horrible detrimental decision of life and death.

Unyielding, Kuroo puts the rest of his weight on the door. The vegetable compartment digs into Bokuto's side. "Just close me in the fridge," Bokuto begs, sagging forwards.

"No can do," he says. If it were an option he'd do it himself, but if his gangly limbs won't fit, Bokuto's beefy ones sure as hell won't. He puts his hands on Bokuto's shoulders and pushes. With minimum force, he falls right over.

"Auuugh, Tetsuuu!" he anguishes. Squirms like he's fight back to stop him, but is simply shoved out of the way. Like he's damming off the river of life, Kuroo closes the fridge door. Bokuto's very close to crying.

Heat lays heavy once the fridge air is used up. Bokuto has not moved, staring so longingly at the fridge. Not even blinking whenever Kuroo nudges him.

It is not looking good for their beach trip. The thought pulls at his guts, pulling them down to his feet. If such a short walk stretched into twenty-five minutes, he's got no clue how long it'll take for them to get to the station. And once they're there—

Thinking about the train cars makes him feel a certain kind of dread. He nearly didn't make it outside for ten minutes. To be in a metal death trap with tons of other people, for maybe two hours... they'd emerge as goo. Could they even make it to the next station without completely melting into the seats? The station might even be shut down. He hasn't even checked.

But it's just Tokyo, too— It's literally perfect at the beaches outside of Tokyo. Lovely temperatures, breezy days. Once they're outside of Tokyo, it's paradise.

Getting there's half the story.

"We're probably gonna have to raincheck for tomorrow, Bo," Kuroo says, knocking his head against the wall. Slouching, he inches down the wall, probably leaving a trail of sweat. Kinda disgusting. He honestly doesn't do anything to keep himself upright. Doesn't feel like he should.

For the second time, he's pushing this trip off, even though he knows how much Bokuto's prepared for it. Hell, he even went ahead and bought beach towels. (They were animal themed, too. Cats and Owls. They were so cute, Kuroo literally felt his heart squeeze when Bokuto showed him.)

Something doesn't quite wilt about Bokuto, but he slackens, sloping. "Okay," he says simply, pouting, and that's it. Kuroo waits for the refutal, the 'it's not thaaat bad outside!', the 'we can power through it!' He waits. Waits.

There is none.

Kuroo's stomach flips strangely, a weird dread in his gut, so he pulls himself upright to quell it.

"Hey," he says, quickly thinking of something, anything, to get that look off of Bokuto's face. With a curious expression, Bokuto rests his cheek atop his knee, waiting patiently. It's very cute of him. Kuroo distinctly pushes that thought aside and grins instead. "How does a water balloon fight sound to you?"

—

Practice is cancelled. Kuroo thanks every god under the sun. Someone would have died from practice if it were to happen— it'd probably be Lev, from either because he's got the heat tolerance of an ice cube or from Yaku's rage. Who knows.

However, during the time he would've been at practice, he finds he has absolutely nothing to do.

At this rate he might just fuse into the couch. His skin's already sticking, so it might as well just blend together. He can't practice volleyball, he might roast if he does it outside or break shit if he does it inside. The TV has nothing interesting on. He doesn't have school work he needs to catch up on. What is he even meant to do?

Audibly his skin tears from the couch when he rolls off. It doesn't hurt, but christ, the noise— he winces. In a haze, he moves to the kitchen, now hungry since he has nothing else to do.

When he opens the fridge with a grand swing, it's sad how hard it is to not crawl it. The popsicle box in the freezer is pathetically empty. Cursing the past him for leaving the fucking empty box like some kind of asshole, getting his hopes up, motherfucker, he plucks it from the shelf and chucks in the trash. After he's relished in the ice crystals on it, of course.

He rests his forehead against the fridge door.

Ahh. He wants some watermelon.

One-hundred percent on a whim, he goes to the store.

(It might not have been his smartest idea, bogged by exhaustion and heat, but he makes it. Somehow.)

"Welcome," the cashier calls from somewhere in the store. Politely she does not say a thing when he takes a whole ten minutes just standing at the freezer section to cool down. She also does not say a thing about how he should definitely not be outside at the height of day.

It's dead silent aside from the whirring of the plug-in fan at the counter and the cicadas outside. No one else is out and about. Usually, he can hear the chatter of the road outside, the screeches of children playing by the river. It's quiet. A damn ghost town outside. Is he in the Matrix? He's in the Matrix.

Maybe the heat's finally turning his brain to goo. He stands in front of the watermelon section for seven minutes before he realizes he's not actually in front of the watermelons, they're broccoli. He shuffles further down. Ah. There they are. Visibly there's no damn difference between the watermelons, but he still stands there and just looks at them, eying the textures. He gets a whole watermelon.

"Everything alright, Tetsurou-kun?"

He honest to god jumps, three inches off the ground and heart almost outta his throat. The watermelon in his hands literally shoots into the air and he scrambles to catch it. It's embarrassingly hard for him to catch it again. Volleyball player, who?

(Distantly, somewhere in the back of his mind, he hears a snort and a 'just like a cat!')

"Oh my, I didn't mean to scare you that bad!" Patting him heavy on the arm, it's the store clerk lady, portly and friendly. He did not realize he already made it to the counter. Jesus, he needs to clear his head. She seems more amused than worried about his whole struggle. "You feelin' alright?"

"Ah, yeah, don't worry about it, I'm just," he lets his eye wander, absently trying to fish for the right word, "out of it. The heat's getting to me, I think." Is he dehydrated? Aw, fuck. He's probably dehydrated, edging on delirious. Isn't this exactly why there's warning about going outside.

Humming, she says, "Go grab a water bottle, Tetsurou-kun, it's on me." It's the Adult Voice that leaves No Room for Refusal. Dutifully he grabs a water bottle from the freezer. She gives him a Stare until he realizes he should actually drink it in front of her. "I haven't see you here without Koutarou-kun in ages," the lady in the lieu of conversation, idly. Unknowingly, Kuroo locks up at the joints.

"Yeah," he says almost mechanically. Grins to loosen up. "It's strange to be here without Bo. Didn't want to bother him just to come with me to get just watermelon, y'know?" The last time he saw Bokuto was maybe a week ago. It's been very, very quiet without him.

"I'm sure he wouldn't have minded! That dear's too nice for his own good," waving her hand dismissively, she scans the lone watermelon he puts onto the counter.

He really is, Kuroo thinks absently. It's exactly why he didn't ask.

"The heat's always a little bit more tolerable when there's someone else with you," she continues, strangely profound, right over his absentmindedness. It makes him think of the walk he's got ahead of him to get home. Jarringly long, though it's barely that far away. Last time he walked back from here to his house was with Bokuto. They stopped at every place they passed, exhausted, but it was bearable. Fun, even.

"It is," he agrees. He looks outside while she bags the watermelon.

Outside, the city melts.

—

[Bokuto 3:56 P.M.] m guessin no beach this week either ?

[Kuroo 4:01 P.M.] don't think so : ( temps just hit highest ever recorded for tokyo jfc

[Bokuto 4:01 P.M.] WHAT didnt think it could even GET hotter here what !!

[Kuroo 4:01 P.M.] the beach might be boilin dude will there even be a beach left for us to go to....

[Bokuto 4:02 P.M.] DONT JINX IT!!!!!

—

"...despite the cold front that was meant to come, the temperatures are still astronomical. Tokyo is currently under Japan's hottest heatwave in all its history," drones the weatherman, who's looking at the broadcasted with a masked dread. "Everyone, stay inside until this heatwave passes. If you have to be outside, wear loose clothes and stay as hydrated as possible. Avoid staying outside for too long, especially if you are eldery—"

Kuroo peels his shirt off his back, uncomfortably damp with sweat. The weatherman isn't saying it, but it's clear as day on screen— the cold front didn't redirect, or gradually vanish. The blue lines are sweeping over Tokyo. The cold front is here.

Yet the temperatures haven't dropped. They haven't touched 30 degrees in weeks. Just in the past few days it's finally passed 40s and it's stillincreasing. At some point they might as well call a state of emergency for the city of Tokyo, if not the entire prefecture. There's never been a heatwave like this before.

Scrunching his nose, Kuroo gazes towards his open window. The sky is a pristine blue, completely cloudless. The sun leers in the sky just beyond the window frame, like an angry eye.

If it's only going to get hotter, he thinks fleetingly, then this could technically be called the cold front.

The thought feels like a resignation. Not groundbreaking, earth-shattering. He slumps back, head hitting the edge of the couch. Every scheduled event in Tokyo has already been postponed or cancelled altogether for the overhanging threat of heat exhaustion and heat stroke. He's got the itching feeling that public transports going to roll to a stop, and, eventually, everything else. How can you even stop a city like Tokyo?

If it gets hotter, what can they even do? Leave? Will everyone in Tokyo be evacuated, relocated?

The image makes his chest churn. He reaches for the remote and changes the channel.

—

Days pass. The temperature increases by three more degrees. It's catastrophic.

So, faced with an indiscernible future and nothing to do, he does what he does best.

He goes to Kenma's.

"Cars are overheating the second they turn on and it's practically dangerous to walk around, even to public transport, which just are functionally giant ovens now. What the hell are we meant to do?" Kuroo drawls, knocking his head against the bed frame, fanning himself with a roll of magazines as a substitute for a paper fan. The walk here didn't last longer than two minutes, but its under direct sun. The back of his neck feels like it's fried. He's gotten smarter about it, though, and brought an obscene amount of water for the walk. The bottle sits half empty next to his thigh.

Kenma looks... miserably resigned, maybe, like this is inevitable. His hair is permanently stringy from sweat, pulled back into the worlds shittiest and smallest pony tail to keep it from hanging in front of his face. A wet rag is draped around his neck, too— he minutely pats the sides of his face with it. Out of everything, the heat has yet to pry his console from his fingers.

"Melt." After a couple of powerful button punches, he glances to him. "If it becomes a national emergency maybe they'll send helicopters." He looks up in thought though his thumbs still fly across the console. "Helicopters can overheat, right?"

"Definitely." Once his arm grows tired, Kuroo lays the magazines over his face. The coated paper is slightly cool. Truthfully, it takes every ounce of his dignity to keep from smushing it into his face right now. "I'm a little insulted it's not a national emergency yet. Do people need to start dropping like flies for the government to consider doing anything?"

"Trick question. The situation needs to be unsalvageable before those in power takes notice. So. Maybe after a few hundred die and the city's on fire. Or until it wrecks some important business man's company."

Kuroo's eyebrows raise. Lolls his head back until he's looking at him upside down from beneath the magazines. "Heavy stuff, Kozume."

A victorious 8-bit jingle erupts from the switch in Kenma's hands. His eyes are sharp when he glances from over the top of it. "Lev may have been right for once, honestly— don't tell him I said that. I'll know if you do. But we could possibly be in this mess all because some rich man was thinking about how to increase production in some unethical way. We could feasibly be in a miniature greenhouse-dome if some factories let out some kind of advanced pollution all for the gains of a single man."

"I don't think there's a kind of pollution out there that can do something like that, especially to this magnitude— and to be so undetected prior? It just can't happen," Kuroo points out, motioning with the magazines, "and if anything, I don't think something that corrupt would happen here first. I'd maybe believe it if it first showed up in America."

"Doesn't matter where, the rich are to never be trusted."

"I'm going to pester you about this conservation if you become wealthy."

"If I become wealthy enough to actually have an impact on the carbon footprint, I'd want you to snipe me."

"Kenma!" Kuroo smacks his leg, scandalized. "Are you just moody because of the weather?"

Blatantly he is ignored. "Either way, you're right. This whole situation should be impossible. Even climate change couldn't just do this. There would've been some obvious kind of... sign, maybe."

"Even with a sign, it doesn't make sense that its thirty degrees in Chiba, yet it's almost fifty here." Begrudgingly, he pulls himself upright, tossing the magazines to the side. "It's only Tokyo! Just us! If it's not climate change, then what else could it be?"

Kenma shrugs, half invested. "Maybe this is how we're repenting."

Kuroo sneers. "Like this is happening because of some god? Of course you would think that, you've only been playing Fire Emblem recently..."

Raising an eyebrow, Kenma very pointedly does not look at him, focused on the game. Which is Fire Emblem. Go figure. "Well? Do you have a better explanation? Even Fukunaga said it's supernatural. That makes more sense than a selective global warming."

He slumps against the bed frame again, feeling a crick grow in his lower spine. The supernatural. He'd like to call bullshit, but at this point, what else would make sense? But— what would it be? He's not exactly religious, so he sure as hell doesn't know what kind of Shinto god has capabilities like this. Maybe some street-side shrine's god? Maybe not even that... Maybe something with its already established god-like statue?

A statue...

A snort bubbles in his throat. He has to stamp it down before he can start full-out cackling, but it still trickles out when he speaks. "Tammy would do it, that bastard— the amusement park's mascot statue. I told you about that thing, right? Suspicious as hell. If supernatural were real, that would have its own conscious."

He doesn't need to look to know that Kenma's face is twisting up in a scowl. "Tammy Tanuki. You think Tammy Tanuki would smite all of Tokyo."

"Y'know what, it's possible!" Kuroo sits up straight again, pressing his hands on his lower back to pop it. "Bo 'n I did throw coins at it! Ain't that disrespectful? Hah, imagine that! A silly amusement park statue saying fuck you to all of us because Bo landed a sick trick on it." He grins, recalling the catch of breath, holding, watching as that final coin soared through the air. That video he took was incredible, too. Two hooligans screeching, the video inconceivably blurry as they celebrated. It's almost like those bottle-flipping videos, but cooler! He should posted that to some other social media rather than just his instagram.

He wonders how Bokuto's fairing. Is he still taking care of Petunia, even in this sweltering heat? Is he putting enough sunscreen on if he does go outside?

It's... been a while since he's seen him.

A toe jabs right into the soft part of his neck abruptly. "I did not let you come over so you could mope and pine."

Jolting, Kuroo twists around, batting at Kenma's foot. "What? I am not pining. Or moping. Where the hell did you get that from?"

Kenma glances at him for a long moment,. "You're denying it."

"Of course I would, because I'm not?" "Then why would you bring up the amusement park? Sounds like pining to me."

Appalled, Kuroo sputters, "Pining for Tammy Tanuki? That thing appears in my dreams sometimes to haunt me, I'd be insane to pine for it. I literally just called it a bastard, too! Is your brain turning to mush?"

The look Kenma gives him makes him look like he's aged fifteen years in two seconds. It's the bone-deep-exasperation look he usually has around Lev, so, to say the least, he's a little hurt it's being used on him. "Kuro," he says, not even trying to school his expression into something more neutral, the asshole, "sometimes, I realize how much of a miracle it is you're academically smart, 'cause you're not smart otherwise."

"What?! Kenma—"

"Are you purposely being stupid?" Kenma sets down his switch in a way that's both gentle and irritated. From the quick glimpse, the screen's off. Instinctively Kuroo tenses. "I saw that wistful look on your face. You weren't thinking about the damn tanuki statue. You were thinking about Bokuto, weren't you?"

It sounds like an accusation. It sits heavily in the base of his gut. "I was, but why—?"

"Do I really need to spell it out?"

Kuroo's mouth is drier than it has been all week, all month. He tries to grin, tries to have some semblance of control, but its wobbly. "You might need to, because I'm not catching your drift."

Something glances across Kenma's face, but it's gone as soon as it shows. "You're pining over Bokuto, Kuro. Why else would you think about the amusement park? Don't give me the bullshit that it's Tammy Tanuki."

His heart misses a couple of beats.

"I— actually was thinking about Tammy first, though—?" he scrambles, because he's lost all purchase, Kenma's swiping out from beneath his feet—

"I don't care about that," Kenma scowls, "Even if you were, you still are pining over Bokuto. You literally just sat here, in my room, talking about Bokuto looking like a nut job in public, with some kind of lovestruck grin on your face. The audacity."

Kuroo's reeling. Mentally, physically, spiritually— he feels like he just got hit by a truck six times over. One second, he's thinking about how, hah-hah, maybe it's that stupid tanuki statue that caused a miniature global warming that scales the Tokyo prefecture, how funny would that be, and then, he's being told he's— he's in love? How the hell is he meant to recover from this? What the fuck? What the fuck?

A look settles on Kenma's face, some kind of expression that feels too soft. The turmoil is probably visible on his own. "We're going to melt to death eventually, you gotta say something."

"There's nothing to say!" Distraught, Kuroo turns away. His neck is more than just hot. He's burning. It makes sense. Does it? Is he in love with— Shit, it's, he's burning up hotter than it is outside, he's going to actually fucking scorch—

Chest tight, he tries focusing on outside because he's going to combust if he thinks of anything else. Blue sky, cloudless, shriveling trees, heat rising from the pavement—

Flashing in his head, the sun shining through the dotted clouds in the sky, coins glittering as they streaked through the air, striking like a gong, boisterous laughter—

Even if it may have possibly been that single moment that caused all of this, he wouldn't trade it for the world. Even if he angered some silly statue, chain-reaction causing a heatwave so violent there may be no recovery, he wouldn't.

The cicadas drone outside, so, so loud. He can feel the heat seeping in from outside, rolling in like a heavy wave from the windows. It trickles up his back, like sweat running backwards, and he. He.

He...

He stands abruptly, startling Kenma. For a moment he just stands and stares at nothing, thoughts lethargic but churning, churning in his head and oh my god.

"Kuro?" Kenma says somewhere, distantly, though he's just inches away. It feels like fuzz in his ears. Gauze. Cotton.

"I," Kuroo breathes, stumbling, "I, uhm. I have to... go." He turns, almost lurching, towards the door. He can't believe it. He can't believe it.

He's not thinking straight in the slightest, he realizes, as he slips his shoes on with a single shove. He's had his whole way of thinking just torn apart and reconstructed in the last two minutes, and, and what the hell is he doing. Plowing past the door, he staggers, it's like stepping into a brick wall of hot. It only stills him for a moment, but he keeps going, he may just disintegrate if he stops. There's clatter behind him and he thinks it's Kenma— if he can even move fast enough— and he makes it to the end of the yard before something nails him in the spine.

"Fuck—!" Kuroo shrieks, hands flying to his back. The point of impact on his back is strangely chilly, and he turns to see a cold water bottle sitting idly on the pavement.

"Are you an idiot?" Kuroo jerks, looking up, and there's Kenma at the doorway of his house, looking more frazzled than he has in hours— no, days. Even the agitation of the prior conversation holds no candle to the expression Kenma's got on his face now. Hand braced against the door frame, he looks like he's physically repulsed from stepping outside, but one step from lurching out and tearing Kuroo's head off his shoulders. Completely sapped of energy, too, just from the movement. "Huh? Did your brain melt out of your ears? Did it?"

Personally, he thinks this kind of assault is uncalled for. He's already been attacked not even minutes ago, come on. Sputtering, Kuroo bends to snatch the bottle from the ground. The condensation from the bottle evaporates almost immediately from the pavement. "Hey—"

"I don't know what you just thought of that was sooo urgent," Kenma bites, knuckles growing white as his agitation rises, "but did you really think you could last even a minute out here without water? Without an umbrella? Huh? We just talked about cars overheating, what the hell makes you think you can just sprint out here!"

He freezes. The heat weighs down on him, horribly overwhelming. He can feel his skin sizzling under the sun. Thinks he can hear it, too. "I..."

What the hell is he doing? Running from Kenma and his horrible confrontations? Running to Tammy Tanuki, maybe, to reconcile, beg forgiveness, please-return-the-temperatures-to-normal?

Running to Bokuto?

Kenma doesn't even give him the chance to gather his thoughts. "I don't care, it's hot." He reaches somewhere behind the door, grabbing for something— and Kuroo only has the briefest moment to catch the umbrella that's lobbed at him. Kenma points threateningly, "Whatever it is, get on with it, but be safe, you idiot, go get more water. Tell me about it later. Get out of the sun. Go before that water bottle becomes lukewarm."

Kuroo's mouth snaps shut. He nods, because that's all he can do, and turns heel and goes.

—

"How willing are you to do something that's dubiously illegal with me?" Kuroo blurts, words falling out of his mouth as he clutches himself upright on the door frame. Seconds pass and he's very, very hypersensitive of every single drop of sweat on him currently, rolling and dripping straight off him and onto the welcome mat below.

All Bokuto can really do is gape. His hair's loose of gel yet pinned back by a bright yellow clip, though stubborn strands still hang against his forehead. It looks unbelievably soft. The sleeveless shirt he's got on settles awkwardly along his neck, like he's been pulling at it to air it out, absolutely drenched in sweat. There's a spot of blue near the corner of his mouth that he can only assume is from an ice pop he may have had a while ago.

God. Even like this he is an absolute sight for sore eyes. It's been how long since he's last seen him? Two weeks? Three? Even with the recent revelations, he's. He's just glad to see him again.

Bokuto's mouth opens and closes three separate times before he settles on: "Can I even ask what dubious means?"

"I'm sure you get the context clues," Kuroo says, not quite snappish. Is he meant to repeat himself in this situation? Bokuto heard him loud and clear, yet, yet he's not saying anything. He fiddles with the umbrella nervously, unsure of how to keep going. It's unintentional, but his absent motions drags Bokuto's attention to it.

Bokuto glances past him, to where the heat rising from the pavement is visible, the browning foliage, and then back, a distraught look twisting on his face. "Jesus, Tetsu, did you— did you walk in this? How in the hell—"

"I've got an idea," he cuts off, leaning in as if it's a secret, "I think I know it! What started all of this shit— the catalyst."

"The huh?" Bokuto echoes, looking more and more confused with each passing second. The furrow in his eyebrow disturbs the sweat resting upon his forehead and slide down his temples. He's looking at Kuroo like he's lost his mind. Well— who wouldn't?

This. This is really not how Kuroo had hoped this would go. He's not exactly sure how this was gonna go, but this— this is not it.

"It was Tammy Tanuki," he plows on before he can lose face. Runs a hand through his bangs to slick them back but they just flop back over his forehead in a gross greasy mass. The empty water bottle in his hand crinkles with the motion. "We— It— Whenever we went to the park, I think it was throwing the coins at the statue. This all started after that day, didn't it? Right? The heatwave?"

Bokuto just looks completely lost at what to even think. "The heatwave? Tammy caused the heatwave?"

"Well— no, not—" he stumbles on his words, choking in his chest, "Christ, I dunno. Maybe? Remember— remember what I said about the coins, and if you landed them in a place they weren't meant to be, it'd piss Tammy off? I was totally bullshitting you, but, but I dunno, it— it's possible. With how fucked up this whole situation is, Tammy being behind all of it honestly could make some kinda sense. So maybe, if we were to, I dunno, get the coin off from Tammy's nose, then maybe? We'd be forgiven? If it's Tammy at all causing this heatwave..."

Once the words finish spilling from his mouth, he has to bite down on his lip to keep from rambling and sounding more like an idiot than he already is. Kuroo swallows thickly, running the back of his wrist under his chin.

God. This is all so fucking ridiculous, but— but this is all he's got. It's silly to think all of this rests on the shoulders of two stupid teenage boys who were just goofing off but. But...

Bokuto scrunches his nose, narrows his eyes. "I knew Tammy was fuckin' suspicious."

Kuroo, if he were a little more exhausted than he already is, could have cried right here and right now. Instead he just folds over and lets out probably the loudest laugh of his life.

—

"This is very illegal." Bokuto's voice almost wavers as he watches Kuroo vault over the fence. He isn't super successful, slick with an ungodly amount of sunscreen, doesn't land very gracefully, but hey, he's over.

"Dubiously illegal," Kuroo corrects, curses, flapping his hand from the sting of the hot metal. Any longer, and his skin might've been seared right off. The sun, hanging above their heads, is fucking vile. He can feel the heat rising from the pavement and it's scorching his damn legs. Doesn't help that the two of them just walked an abysmal distance in this goddamn heat, stopping every five minutes to rest and refresh and AUGH, his legs are already tired—

"I still don't know what that means," he whines, fidgeting. "Akaashi would kill both of us if he knew we were doing this. Without a doubt. I think I can hear him on his way over to come knock our heads off."

"All the more reason we should just hurry in," Kuroo reaches over the fence, motioning for the umbrella. "He wouldn't break in just to scold us, right? So if we're in, he wouldn't be able to kill us just yet."

"Yeah, but..." he passes the umbrella and grabs hold of the bars, wincing. While his climb over is awkwardly clunky, he does manage to land on his feet unlike Kuroo who nearly landed on his face. Once he lets go of the bars, he lets out a howl of pain, planting his hands on his thighs, then grumbles again when his hands burn the skin. "It's the yet! 'Kaashi would be waiting for us by the time we get out! We'll be trapped in here until the actual police come and get us! He might spare me, but I think he might actually beat you up, Tetsu."

"What! Why me?" He slips to Bokuto's side, putting both of them shoulder to shoulder to stay in the umbrella's shade. He's painfully aware Akaashi thinks he's a pain-in-the-ass, but damn, to actually be clobbered? Akaashi doesn't exactly look the beefiest, not like Bokuto, but regardless he's still an athlete. If he's unhinged, Kuroo's life might actually be in danger.

Bokuto doesn't really meet his eye when he shrugs. Weirdly enough, he gets the idea.

"I mean, you did just drag me along to commit a crime..."

"It's not a crime if no one finds out!"

With almost too much force, Bokuto nudges him with his shoulder, bubbling with laughter. Kuroo tries to save face but totally ends up stumbling almost completely face first onto the pavement. "Man, you're meant to be the more reasonable out of the two of us! How am I meant to argue with that?"

He's missed it. God, he's missed it.

Belatedly, he realizes just how quiet it is out here when Bokuto's impossibly loud laugh echoes through the park. He hears the tail end of it once, twice, then it's gone, and the dead silence of the air takes its place.

It's very strange to walk through the park when it's completely empty. There's no hum of rollercoasters, no jeers of children, no peppy tinny background music blaring over the speakers. Even stranger, their conversation tapered off almost immediately, and Kuroo's not sure if it's because it's too hot to talk, or there's a reason his hearts fluttering somewhere in his throat.

The path to the pond is not long. Now cleared of the usual human traffic and their brisk pace (the pavement's hot as hell, shit), they stand at the fence to the pond in minutes flat. The pond's half full— no, not even— probably a quarter full, most of its evaporated out by this point. The special theatrical arcs of water are no longer running, though the gleaming of coins beneath the statue light it up in its own kind of horrible theatrics.

Tammy looks strangely lonely out in the middle of the pond. Maybe, also, like a caged beast.

Peering from the corner of his eye, he sees Bokuto's just staring out to Tammy. There's a challenging look in his eye and it starkly reminds him of the first time they stood here, armed with coins and the air twenty degrees cooler. He bites his tongue.

"Well," he starts, inhaling deeply.

"All we gotta do is just find those coins, right?" Bokuto says clearly like it's nearly the easiest thing in the world, the single answer to all the problems. He grins to Kuroo, and honestly, maybe he's right. Anything is possible, especially with this kind of attitude, especially with Bokuto by his side. "No need to waste time standing around!" he hollers, his voice echoing, echoing. Without any warning, he swings his leg over the short fence, and begins his descent.

Blistering hot. It's abysmal. Jesus fuck, how the hell is the water not boiling yet. Kuroo breathes in deeply, steels his nerves. Even with his shoes still on— the dark polyester of the pond bottom looks like it will sear his foot right off— nothing will be able to sooth this scalding. He's glad the water only reaches his calfs. Any higher and he may just wimp out.

Water had seemed so kind, a sanction in this hell, he almost dreamed about wading in it— but this is horrible.

Splash.

"Holy fuck!"

Kuroo turns— Bokuto's hopping foot to foot, wincing 'hot! hot!' with every step. Probably seconds away from lunging back out of the water. "How the hell are you not— not dying?" Bokuto cries, eyes squished tight as he rises an inch, on his tippy toes.

"It's the perk of already being hot," Kuroo winks, and grimaces. "That was awful. Sorry. I am trying really hard not to yell right now. It's not all that different from a jacuzzi, right? Just. A couple degrees hotter."

"Tetsu," Bokuto says warily, frowning as he trudges behind, umbrella up and opened in his hand, "Are— Are you sure about this? Man, I can't tell your mom that I willingly let you roast like a turkey in a big ole pond—"

"You're roasting with me, how would you even tell my mom?" He retorts automatically. Then, momentarily, he bites his tongue, hesitating.

He's... He's really just dragging Bokuto out here, isn't he? Making him walk with him in near catastrophic temperatures, where plants have shriveled and traffic cones have melted— All under the pretense of 'just trust me'? If Bokuto had shown up at his house, telling him to come cross the city in this sweltering heat, he—

...what would he have done?

"You... don't have to do this with me," he says belatedly as he slows to a stop. The words sit awkward in his tongue, regretful, "I know this kinda sucks— er, really sucks— so you... don't have to."

Bokuto blinks at him owlishly, pausing. Fear builds up in his throat, and momentarily, he thinks Bokuto might actually take the offer and leave. He's been talking about how dangerous it is to be out here, how risky it is. Of course he doesn't want to be here. What the hell was he thinking? Kuroo would honestly not be surprised if he left at this point.

He's not sure he'd be able to convince himself to stay out here without Bokuto by his side.

"Well!" he puffs up, finally reaching Kuroo and covering him in the red-tinted shade of the umbrella, "I can't let you roast out here alone! Plus, if what you're sayin' is right, it is kinda also my fault that this whole heatwave shit happened. So I'm here!"

In the red coloring cast, the pink of Bokuto's sun burn almost looks like blush.

Kuroo doesn't get a chance to stare longer when Bokuto swivels to look at him, somehow beaming in this temperature. "Besides, who else would hold up the umbrella?"

Groaning, Kuroo shoves him but he's grinning, grinning so wide. His stomach's all warm and he knows it's not just the weather causing it. "Letting me do all the grunt work, huh! I see what's going on!"

"I mean, you did say that you're resilient to heat because you're already hot!" he counters, cheeky. Kuroo gasps.

"I can't believe you! Using my own words against me—! Where the hell did you learn the word resilient?"

He glitters. "I knew that one myself!"

Once again, the imposing figure of Tammy Tanuki towers over them. Looming more and more as they approach. Christ, it's bigger up close than he thought. Tammy's just eerie now, with the lack of theatrics and children's laughter in the distance, with hard shadows casted across its face from the sun's harsh angle.

The two of them are so tiny compared to it, it's almost like two unbelievers standing before an angry god. Once that image crosses Kuroo's mind, he really has to bite down to keep from snorting.

The umbrella tips back, too far back, and the unyielding sun nearly blinds him. "Bo, man, what—" he sputters, throwing his hands up to at least save his eyes.

"It's not there!" Bokuto blurts, boggled. He quickly readjusts the umbrella, but his eyes don't stray from the tanuki's face. Kuroo follows, perplexed, and—

The coin's no longer balanced on the stubby nose.

It feels like a joke. He waits and waits but the coin does not reappear, does not come out of hiding. He quickly skims the entire structure for— for anywhere it could've landed, if it was knocked off by the wind or something, but there's nothing except the water below.

Kuroo clicks his tongue, stomach plummeting. "Well. Shit. That just made things harder."

"I... I can't believe it..." mourning, Bokuto trudges closer to the statue, stopping right where it starts becoming a mine-field of scorching hot coins. His eyes don't leave the tanuki's nose once, like he's desperately watching, waiting for it to reappear. "My... my sick trick... my trick shot... gone..."

For a painstakingly long moment, Kuroo feels like it's all in vain. It takes an even longer moment to even think of something positive about this situation. Something that isn't... well. Making this a waste of time. "Well," Kuroo starts, trickling, coming up with it as he goes. Slaps a hand on Bokuto's shoulder blade to perk him up, maybe. "I was worried that one of us was gonna have to climb Tammy. That woulda caused more damage than breaking in. Just another charge to add on if we're caught. It's gotta be around the statue somewhere."

Unbelieving, Bokuto motions to the coins scattered around the statue. "But— there's a billion coins over here! There's no way we'll find the one you gave me!"

His feet already ache just thinking about how long he's gonna be standing in this water, ankles scalding from boiling water. Who in their right minds started the whole tradition of throwing coins in ponds for good luck? He's going to throttle whoever it was. Asshole. "Ain't no one else gonna be throwing a five-hundred yen into here but us. And even if there are others five-hundreds, then ours would be the one closest to the statue, right? Since it was probably knocked off by the wind?"

Bokuto halts so suddenly Kuroo thinks he can hear the whiplash. "You gave me a five-hundred yen to throw?" Suddenly Bokuto's wide, earnest eyes are pinned on him. It's a bit much. He leans towards Kuroo, pressing, peering at him even when he turns away. "You— Did you believe I could make it that much? You betted that much on me?"

"I didn't have any other change!" he flushes, "I mean, I knew if you had an unlimited amount of coins you would've made it at some point, and I thought what the hell—" He lengthens his stride, ducking from beneath the umbrella, just so Bokuto won't see how embarrassingly pink his face just got. However, his friend's an absolute hardhead, dearly stubborn, and easily matches his pace.

"Tetsuuu," he coos, nearly too gleeful with the information he's just obtained. "You did have faith in me! I can't believe it— you said I wouldn't make it, but all along—!!"

"Who's Bokuto Koutarou? I don't know who that is," Kuroo says loudly, mockingly, crouching down and quickly darting his hands in the water to scoop up coins. Fucking Owch— like he thought, the coins are scorching hot, even worse with the water. They clink almost musically as he rifles through them quickly. None of the coins show the arcade's logo, none of them that dull brass. Grimacing, he puts them aside, plop plop plop into the water.

He knew, but this... This is going to take forever.

There's a shuffle beside him, and to his surprise Bokuto crouches down too, arm brushing against his shoulder. He dips his hand into the water and takes his pick, though he immediately drops them out of his palm whenever they start searing into it, wincing.

Kuroo pauses to raise an eyebrow. "I thought you were the designated umbrella-holder?"

Cheeks puff up in a pout, Bokuto tries again. "It's boring just standing here. I can't let you do all the work, y'know. I've got to find that five-hundred yen and treasure it, it's the symbol of your faith in me—"

"Oh god, no more," Kuroo whines, knocking his elbow into Bokuto's side. Somehow, Bokuto's unbalanced enough that the nudge is enough to nearly teeter him into the water, so he quickly latches onto Kuroo before he can truly eat shit.

"Bro, be merciful! I think I'll instantly boil if I fall in," he cries. His grip is tight on Kuroo's forearm, fingers digging into pink skin, burning slightly with the hot water.

"Not my fault you're all wobbly," Kuroo grins, though it's uneven itself, crooked and goopy. He's not sure if he's imagining it, not sure, but he swears Bokuto's hand lingers longer than it should, grip firm yet softening. He's looking too deeply into it. Fuck, Kenma put all of this shit into his head, 'liking' Bokuto, and it's, it's— it's making him more skittish, more jumpy. He's gonna see things that aren't there, now that his world's rearranged and slotted back into place. It's embarrassing, they're really close to each other, Bokuto's shoulder occasionally brushing his, his ears bright pink, his stupid, stupid—

God, he might love him.

He turns back to the coins, gently pulling his arm from Bokuto's hand. Like a fucking coward, he does not look back.

And, after a brief moment, though it seems much longer with how double-timed Kuroo's heart is beating, Bokuto resumes the motions as well.

It's hot. Even with the umbrella, even with the sunscreen, he feels like he's fucking melting, standing in this stupid pool of water, crouching, shuffling through hundreds of steaming hot coins in steaming hot water, looking for some silly arcade coins, for the silly five-hundred yen.

The sun now peeks between the trees along the skyline, which is the only way to tell they've been at this for more hours than necessary. Now that the sun isn't directly overhead, no longer boiling the water and scorching the skin, they've reduced to kneeling and the umbrella idles in the water, abandoned. The air, however, is still stagnant with heat. Fucking humidity. His shirt is soaking wet and he has barely even touched the water's surface with it.

Maybe it's been two hours, or four. He's got no goddamn clue. All he knows is that they've got seven of the nine arcade coins and no five-hundred yen. If it's been two hours, then that's at least three coins an hour average. So another hour, and hopefully, probably, he'd have them all. But if it's been four...

My brain's too mushed to think about this, he relents, rocking back on his heels to press his palms into his eyes. It's going to melt out of my ears. It's not even that hot anymore.

He presses his thumbs in harder until colors flicker across his vision. Who am I kidding. It's still hot. It's never not gonna be hot.

Behind him, there's the telltale plops of coins into the water. A dejected sigh. Kuroo's stomach folds in on itself, so he sticks his hand back into the water to distract himself.

They've been working in a silent tandem this whole, which is so unlike them it pulls at Kuroo's stomach. Not a peep from either one of them. No jests, no snickers, no roughhousing. At this point, he's not going to lose it because he's been sifting through hundreds of coins for hours on end, but from how much the silence is killing him.

He just— hopes things will turn back to how they were before, even if they manage to get all of the coins or not.

"Hey, Tetsu," Bokuto says absently, swirling his hand in the water rather than picking up more. Full-bodied, Kuroo jumps, but quickly tries to compose himself though his shoulders remain tense. He hums, not trusting his voice— it will warble, he knows. His fingers are pruny and no longer sting from the hot metal of the coins.

"Tetsu," Bokuto repeats. Finally he looks up, his eyes are trained to the water, glassy. The coins reflect the dying sunlight onto his face, the lights dancing with the water's movement. Kuroo's never seen him this still before.

"Hm?" he barely manages, the noise caught in his throat. If it didn't feel so off, he'd bask in this image of Bokuto, soft edges even rounder, a polite orange coloring his cheekbones.

The brief pause echoes a lot louder than it should, with the lack of, well... everything, around them. Bokuto takes in a breath. It's the most defeated sound he's ever heard come from him.

"We should probably just... go back."

Kuroo straightens up from his stooped crouch. Unexpected, is what he'd like to call it, but he's had the inkling sitting low in his chest this whole time. "Wh— We've nearly gotten all the arcade coins, and the yen's gotta be here somewhere!" When he presents his hand, where he's had the coins clutched, the arcade symbol's in red impressions on his palm. He sounds desperate. Fuck, he doesn't want to, but he is.

It's just— if they leave, he feels like it'll all be over.

"I mean—" ahh, he didn't notice— he didn't realize how aggravated Bokuto is about the prospect of giving up. Didn't catch the growing frustration in his movements. "It's just... we've cleared most of the pond already, and it's been a while since either of us found one, and I know I was just kidding about it earlier, but I think your mom's actually gonna call the police if we're here longer."

He wants to protest it, but honestly, who's he fooling? The yen was already gone from Tammy's nose. His whole theory was riding on the fact that it was resting up there. But it's gone. Not even there. And if it that was the whole catalyst, then what the hell are they doing out here?

Kuroo breathes in shallowly. Once, twice. Gathers his will. "Alright," he says, standing. Disrupting the stillness around him, the swish of water from his movement is jarringly loud— he didn't think he stood up that abruptly, but huh, maybe he did. Jesus, he needs to get himself under control."Okay. Yeah. We... We should go."

There's a complete lack of motion from Bokuto.

To keep from losing composure, Kuroo moves to retrieve the umbrella instead, which has idly drifted away. He reaches for the handle only to realize he's still got all seven coins clenched in his hand still. Still. Even subconsciously, he's still hoping. He breathes in deeply— in and in until he can't keep going— exhales.

He lets go of the coins unceremoniously. No need for them, really.

Just as the coins splish into the water, there's a strangled noise from behind him.

"Dude, you—!" blurting, Bokuto leaps to his feet. In a splash that soaks most of Kuroo, he dives straight into the water. Frantically he regathers all the coins Kuroo just dumped, breathing a sigh of relief when they're all in his palm.

Jarred, Kuroo just watches, startled into stillness. The water's lukewarm from where it clings onto his skin. "What are you—?"

As if they're precious to him, Bokuto pulls his hands closer to his chest, cupping the coins like they're delicate. "I mean— I meant!" Choked up. That's the only way he can describe the floundering Bokuto's doing, the thickness of his voice. "I didn't— actually mean give up. I meant for today! It's almost dark and I think we'll become prunes if we stay out here longer, so, we can just— come back tomorrow!"

He's never been this stupefied before, he thinks. Never been this bewildered, this boggled, this what-ever-synonyms-for-shocked-there-is. "Come back tomorrow?" he echoes dumbly, "W— Why? There's no reason to?"

"No reason too—?" Bokuto parrots, squawking, appalled. He sinks lower until he's just sitting in the water, growing more confused. "Dude, we didn't even get all of them yet! We have to get them all, don't we?"

"It's not even worth it to get them all." Admitting it out loud— he can't tell if it's a relief or not. It's a resignation, and it's pulling at his guts.

The furrow between Bokuto's eyebrows deepens and deepens.

"Everything I had was literally depending on the coin being there, though," Kuroo stresses, continuing, motioning abortedly towards the statue, "I— I thought Tammy was so pissed that you got the coin there, so once it was off, Tammy wouldn't have reason to cause a catastrophic heatwave! But it's gone, there's still a heat wave, and we've been sitting out here for hours for no reason."

"It's not just for no reason, Tetsu," Bokuto tries, but something's building in Kuroo's chest, clawing higher and higher until its in the top of his throat.

"It was," he croaks, shaking his head, "It was— ridiculous, I can't even believe—" He leans back, back, face tilted up towards the fading sky. "I went out a limb more than anything. Can you believe? I pulled this theory out of my ass since Kenma n' I were talkin' about this whole thing, and I used it as..." He swallows, swallows again, but there's nothing getting past the thickness in his throat. "... as a excuse to see ya."

Bokuto's dead silent in this moment. So still he might not be breathing.

"I'm," Kuroo pauses, almost wheezing, unsure, because Bokuto's not responding, he's not responding, how is he meant to take that? "I'm sorry I, I dragged you out here to roast with me, all for some, some stupid reason. I just. I panicked and..."

Condescendingly, Kenma's voice echoes in his head, 'We're going to melt to death eventually, you gotta say something.' Fuckin' Kenma. He wasn't ready to jump this hurdle yet. He wasn't ever gonna be ready. The words rest on the back of his tongue, refusing to come out or go back down, and he feels like he's gonna puke.

"Tetsurou," Bokuto starts after a beat. Unfaltering. "I'd go anywhere with you."

The world rocks. There's no excuse this time he could possibly come up with for how he flushes. How the hell does he sound so sure—

"I thought," his mouth forms words, but he doesn't say any of them, momentarily unsure. He's silent until he looks Kuroo straight in the eyes. "I thought I maybe fucked up somewhere— been to clingy, maybe freaked you out. 'Kaashi called me out sometimes, saying I was been too much. I dunno! I just like being around you, with you. I was really scared I scared you off."

"You'd. Never scare me off, Bo," Kuroo says, just above a whisper, because, because this sounds like something and he's very scared he might misinterpret.

Bokuto's eyes crease in a smile, dawning. "Sweet!" He says, loudly. It's loud enough it echoes, disrupts the silence that's settled over the park. He winces, sheepish. "Sweet," he tries again, quieter. "So, then, it wouldn't scare you off if I said I liked you?"

Like a blow to the face, Kuroo teeters, dropping into the water with a plop. The ripples wake against Bokuto's knees, making a small personal light show for the brightest thing in his life. "It wouldn't," he says, because christ, he's gonna melt out here. He's gonna dissolve in this water and it's gonna be so embarrassing.

Rushing out a relief breath, Bokuto eases. He didn't notice his shoulders were hitching up in tension. "Cool," he says, giddy, jumpy. "Sweet. Awesome. That's great. 'cause I like you."

Laughter bubbles out of his throat, though it's wet and gooey and he might've hiccuped by the end of it. "Don't say that so easily, you big doof," Kuroo says thickly, resting back into the water.

Unfair. Bastard. How unfair, he can say kinda stuff and not have his whole world tremor.

Pressing his hands over his face to keep from growing pinker, Kuroo breathes. Maybe he can drown before he makes more of a fool of himself.

"Wanna come over?" he suggests, muffled by his palms. His stomach's fluttering like he's asking something risky. Like he's asking for a first date. Silly. Ridiculous. They've been on plenty already, haven't they? "I've got some of your spare clothes at home. We've got ice pops, too."

From the stomach, Bokuto laughs, something chime-y and wonderful. He presses his palm against Kuroo's stomach, pushing him, and he jerks to smack at his hand. "D'ya even need to ask?" he says, doughy.

Backlit by the setting sunlight, Bokuto's probably the best thing he's ever seen in his damn life.

"I just hope Akaashi's not waiting by the park gates," he admits sheepishly when he pulls Kuroo upright. Throughout the park, Kuroo's laugh echoes, scratchy, loud, but it's the loveliest.

Behind them, Tammy Tanuki shrinks and shrinks, then disappears in the distance.

—

"Can I get a Bubbles pop? Ah, actually— two of them?"

Resting his elbows on the wood of the counter, Kuroo looks out to the ocean. The edge of the sea, dotted with the bright colors of people, blends near seamlessly with the sky.

"Here you go," the teenager says, handing him the popsicles. She's not the pink-haired one from the stand by the riverside, but she's got the same charming smile. Must be an ice-cream stand employee requirement.

Thanking her, he steps out from the awning onto piping hot sand. Unbelievably hot sand. Jesus fuck. He doesn't hop on his toes, not quite— he couldn't even salvage his dignity if he did. A mere couple minutes in the shade, and he's already lost his numbness to the heat. He wishes he brought sandals or something. His toes fucking hurt.

God. Where did his damn immunity go? He managed two weeks in a catastrophic heatwave, why the hell is hot sand his downfall?

It's, frankly, quite wild that just last week Tokyo was on the edge of becoming a giant hot pot. Literally one of the most extreme heatwaves on the planet— relative to location, of course— nearly closing down the entire city to a stillness.

And, somehow, within a two day period, the temperature in Tokyo plummeted from near fifty degrees to a helluva-lot-more-tolerable thirty. A month long disaster, cleaned up and wiped away in two days. Ridiculously unbelievable. But hey, it's whatever. It took a while for everything to get back onto its feet— train tracks were still cautiously looked after, and things that had melted had to be repaired or replaced. But everything's crawling back to normal.

And for the first time in nearly a month, he's actually willingly standing in the sunlight.

Growth.

Fuckin' Tammy Tanuki, he thinks, idly strolling back to their spot. What a rat bitch.

"Ah— Tetsurou!!"

Mid-motion he turns and proceeds to get blinded on the spot. He has to throw his hands up to block the sun, what the fuck, the motherfucker's bright, but it's awkward to try and block it with the ice pops in his hands—

A hand shoots up into the air and waves around haphazardly until it casts a shadow over his eyes, the palm blocking the sun for the most part. It momentarily helps but the fact that it keeps moving and light keeps peeping through his fingers generally makes it useless. Laughter bubbles from his throat, giddy, and Kuroo smacks Bokuto on his shoulder whenever he's close enough. "You're not helping much, bud."

Bokuto puffs his cheeks out, smushing his hand over Kuroo's eyes. "At least I tried!" His hands are grossly sweaty and gritty at the same time, a really weird feeling on his face, so Kuroo tries prying his hands off, snorting. In retaliation— just because he can— Bokuto presses both his hands on his face, squishing his nose. Then he halts very abruptly. Peeling Bokuto's hands off his face, he sees that all focus is directed to what's in his hand. "Dude, is that what I think it is?"

Cheekily, Kuroo presents the ice pops with flourish, bowing with an arm extended, holding Bokuto's long-desired Bubbles pop. "You betcha."

With how loud Bokuto's gasp is you woulda thought he'd be proposing. "B-Bro," he says, watery. He takes it with certain kind of gentleness Kuroo didn't think he had in him.

Knocking his own pop against his, Kuroo grins, "Wouldn't be a proper trip if we didn't have ice cream, right?"

Momentarily there's no response from Bokuto. An expression's on his face that's a little indiscernible— a little too heartfelt. It's very soft on his face. Feather-soft. It makes his pulse rise in this throat, just before a grin splits across Bokuto's face, dispelling the fluttering. "'Course," he says, and he steps close enough to Kuroo to where their elbows and shoulders knock while they walk.

Kuroo tries very, very hard not to go bright red in the face.

Completely ungracefully, Bokuto practically flops straight down onto his towel, disrupting just about everything and sending sand everywhere. Doesn't seem to bother him, though— he fidgets, patting Kuroo's towel with vigor. "C'mon! We gotta open them at the same time!! Tetsu!!"

"Alright, alright," he grins, exasperated, ducking beneath the umbrella and settling onto his towel. The umbrella's just barely big enough for the two of them with their broad shoulders (more like just Bokuto's broad shoulders—), so they're thigh to thigh, elbows and knees knocking together. Bokuto's jittering so much Kuroo can feel his bones vibrate.

Pinching the wrapper, Bokuto looks towards Kuroo, expression bright, eyes creasing. "On the count of three, okay?"

"One, two... three!"

In his vigor Bokuto nearly drops the entire popsicle onto his leg. Side by side, they present them. And like an off switch, Bokuto's smile plummets. With a laugh that grows and grows, Kuroo has to turn away from Bokuto to keep from totally losing it. "No way," Bokuto mutters, sounding so so confused, appalled, and it's sending Kuroo into a fit of laughter again. "They look normal?" Offended, Bokuto squints at the Bubbles pops, eyes roving over each part.

They're the most normal looking Bubbles pops he's ever seen. Didn't even think it was possible to get one that looks normal.

Honestly, it's kinda funny in how ironic it is. "I think its due— after all the misfits we got, there's finally a proper one," Kuroo says placatingly, grinning. He inspects his own— Maybe the gum ball eyes are a little off-centered, but honestly, she's not a monstrosity.

"I want a refund," Bokuto grumbles. Kuroo throws his head back and howls in laughter.

"I knew it, you only want them for the funny-factor," he accuses, leaning heavily against Bokuto until he leans over too, though he's laughing too much to make it sound like a real accusation.

Bokuto looks confused that Kuroo would assume anything else. "It's one of their defining features." Grumpily he pops it in his mouth, munching with such a scowl on his face. It's probably the angriest he's ever eaten ice cream before, and the whole ordeal just Kuroo wheeze.

"Anyways—" Kuroo starts, trying to divert the conversation so that he stops looking so down, "How's the games been going?" He nods towards the net Bokuto had just been playing at. Teenagers currently are bumping the ball across the net with the ease of those who truly don't give a shit who wins or not. One does a spectacular dive to save a ball, getting a mouthful of sand. Unfortunately, the ball does not go far up into the air from their save, sadly hitting the sand with a pomf. The lost point doesn't bring them down, though— everyone's laughing at the mess of sand on the teen's face. Even the teen's laughing, too, practically spewing sand outta their mouth.

"Oh!" Almost too easily, Bokuto brightens up. Takes a huge ass bite from Bubbles's pigtail before speaking. "It sucks ass! Absolute ass! It is impossible to get a good jump! All I've got going for me is that I can still hit it over okay-ish, but it's horrible, man."

"Well, at least it's not solid wood you're diving into." Residual sand is dotted all over Bokuto's face— it would look like freckles if it wasn't so pale. Brushing his palm over Bokuto's cheeks, he really ends up just smudging the sand across on his face, but the flush that grows along his neck is well worth it.

"It's not really any kinder," Bokuto whines, "Like, sure, I'm not breaking my ribs against floorboards, but... but there's sand up my ass."

"Gross."

"SUPER gross!" Shaking the sand from his hair, which has grown willowy with the humid air, he takes another bite from his ice pop. Then he sputters so loudly people walking by glance to make sure he's not dying. "Why! It's everywhere! Everywhere!" he cries, spitting the chunk of ice to the side. When Kuroo looks closer, there's the sprinkling of sand particles all over the remnants of Bubbles.

"That one was totally on you, you doof, you just shook the sand outta your hair with your pop in your hand," Kuroo grins, not sympathetic in the slightest. However, he hands his still-completely-intact Bubbles to Bokuto, who watery blinks at it, mid scrapping the sand off his tongue. "Have mine— I can try to wipe it off of yours in the meantime."

A dopey smile crests across his face. Simply looking at it makes Kuroo flustered, unbearably to the core, so he forcibly switches the pops to look away. "D'aww, Tetsu," Bokuto coos, the affection palpable in his voice. He nudges his elbow into Kuroo's rib, obnoxious, but so fond. "Yer bein' so nice to me. D'ya got a crush on me or somethin'?"

Nonplussed, Kuroo scoops up a handful of sand and reels back, threatening. Bokuto screeches. Bodily turns away, shielding his ice cream. "You wouldn't!" he cowers.

Though having the power is very nice, he lowers his hand because he's a patron saint. "You're right, I'm too nice to ya," he sneers. Smears the sand off the pop with a spare napkin. The napkin does not get the sand off. There's sand on the napkin. Fuckin'— there's sand everywhere.

What else is he expecting? It's the damn beach. Ah. Whatever. He sticks the pop in his mouth. The sand granules scrape against his tongue, but soon enough they're just in his saliva, which he spits out to the side.

Bokuto's nose is scrunched up like he's watching the worst thing occur. His Bubbles pop is already nearly demolished. "Gross. How can you eat sand."

"Didn't," he corrects. The ice cream's sugary sweet now that the sand's out of his mouth.

"You so just did."

"Didn't you eat some earlier?" he prods, grinning a sharp cat's grin. Bokuto bristles full-bodied, embarrassed. "I saw that dive." He whistles, taunting, "Didn't even save it. A whole mouthful of sand, for nothing... Top ace of the country, who?"

Looking like he's five seconds from just leaping at him, Bokuto almost bursts. "I'd like to see you try! Which one of us will eat the most sand! I don't think you'd even be able to block me," he challenges, puffing up, very smug about it.

Kuroo snorts. "Who's the one here who can jump higher? I can block you easy-peasy."

Briefly, Bokuto's momently stilled. Like he's genuinely surprised. Then he leans, far, far into Kuroo's personal space, "You— You're actually gonna come play a round?" he asks, glimmering. The gold of his eyes glitters so brightly, a sparkling so tangible. Even if he wasn't already planning on playing a round, that charm— he'd be convinced in a second. Bokuto could probably convince him to do whatever he wants.

"'Course I will," he says, fondness pulling at his guts. What a volleyball brain. They're at the beach and they haven't even gone in the water once yet. "What else did I come here for?"

He'd go anywhere he'd ask, after all.

"Besides. Gotta show ya how to set properly, after all," smirking, Kuroo stands up briskly, striding out from their little umbrella to leave a gaping Bokuto to scramble after him a second later. In a couple of long strides, Bokuto falls in step with him, bumping their shoulders together. This time, it's his smile blinding him. He might need to wear sunglasses every time he looks at him.

"You're on!"

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#kuroo tetsurou #bokuto koutarou #bokuro #this is my pride and joy #do not take it seriously. its a lil silly #sappy #fluff #italics didn't move over but! not feeling like adding them in rn! go to ao3 lol

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bill-the-baker · 5 years

Photo

I’ve also decided to finish this decade with something more light-hearted, detailing the many trends that one can associate with the past ten years. I styled this picture in a similar fashion to those gaudy collages you have relating to the 1980s and 1990s, with this mainly being reflected in the style of this picture. The title of the picture holds a very minimalist design, and is shown from inside a phone, whilst the rest of the poster has a dull white background. These main design choices were added to reflect the omnipresence of smartphones in this decade, as well as the general trend of Minimalism, which has been followed by many companies in recent years. The decision to make the background seem plain was not completely because I’m feeling lazy, but because I tried to follow the trend of minimalism, a trend I personally hate because of how boring it is (I probably would have added in a pretty pattern if there was some other major design trend).

Beyond this though, there are a few other things I chose to add in to reflect the 2010s:

-Ragecomics- The basis of most early-2010s memes.

-Skrillex (or rather Dubstep in general)- A key figure in a genre of music that you either loved or hated.

-Obama- A fantastic President who laid the groundwork for change that will hopefully be built upon in the future.

-Hipster culture- Fresh-out-of-college rich kids who made avoiding the mainstream a mainstream trend.

-The Occupy Movement (“We are the 99%” sign)- A promising post-Great Recession movement with disappointing results.

Gay Rights- Gay marriage is now legal in places like the United States, and homosexuality is more accepted the western world, so much so that companies are now no-longer afraid to pander to them whenever June comes around. Still, other parts of the planet have yet to change their outdated ways.

Trans rights- With people like Caitlyn Jenner and Leelah Alcorn, Transgenderism has arrived into the forefront of social issues, though it remains a strongly divisive issue throughout the decade.

Drones- Like helicopters but smaller and cheaper.

Overwatch- An interesting game that offered a unique personality to the shooter genre in a decade oversaturated with annual Call of Duty releases.

Cuphead- A challenging run-and-gun platformer with a Golden-Age animation-style, showcasing what can be made through video games these days.

Minecraft- The game that doesn’t die. It defined the childhoods of many gamers who fondly remember the early-2010s, and has since made a major resurgence in the decade’s end.

Steven Universe- A much-loved show that offered many unique and progressive themes, which I can admire despite my mixed feeling for the show itself.

Gravity Falls- A show aimed at children didn’t have to be this immersive and interesting, but Alex Hirsch and his team did it anyway and offered the world two seasons of hilarious and yet gripping television.

Political correctness/Woke-ness (“That’s Offensive” speech bubble)- Something that has been pushed to death among the political mainstream, but especially by the Left, as people are silenced whilst others demand safe spaces to keep their precious feelings from being hurt. Political correctness is a somewhat-trend that is better off staying in this decade.

Shrek- Whilst the 2010s have been starved of a new Shrek film besides the contested “Shrek Forever After”, the “Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life” greentext story, despite its crude subject matter, has made the brutish but kind ogre a mainstay in meme culture, whilst offering people the opportunity to explore the nuances of the franchise, after growing up with the character.

Pewdiepie- Starting out strong in the decade, making a name for himself as “that funny Swedish guy who screams as scary games”, an incident in February 2017, in which he was called a Nazi by the mainstream media, resulted in him becoming a more independent and politically incorrect figure, before going on to unite the internet in a battle for the most subscribed YouTube channel against a corporation. He lost in the end, but it was fun while it lasted.

Tyler, the Creator- Offering a unique sound among waves of forgettable Pop music, Tyler evolved from an edgy but somewhat humorous rapper, to an interesting and poignant singer in this past decade, achieving near-mainstream success.

Marvel Cinematic Universe (Endgame logo)- Many mainstream cinemagoers are bound to have seen at least one of these groundbreaking movies in cinemas, with their intense action and perfectly balanced humour, all culminating in the outstanding films “Avengers: Infinity War” and “Avengers: Endgame”.

Death Grips- Unlike anything that has ever been popular among general audiences, the exciting tunes concocted by MC Ride and Zach Hill have remained in the minds of many younger and more alternative individuals.

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic- Arguably the most unlikely of fanbases to come around in this decade, this re-imagining of an 80s cartoon series had a style of humour and storytelling that peaked the interests of a group of adult men known as “Bronies”, who’s reasons for being interested were questioned and much of the internet hated them, but they were certainly something to behold throughout these years.

The 2016 Presidential Election (Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump)- A time many can regard as the branching-off point between the first and second halves of the decade, as the extremes of both sides were exposed to the world with astonishing results.

Vine- A social media platform that has since disappeared off the face of the Earth, but brought about many notable celebrities and memes that are often remembered by younger generations.

Vaporwave- Alongside Hipsters, Vaporwave was perhaps one of the few examples of a concrete “counter-culture” movement, offering an anti-Capitalist message within its use of music and iconography from the 1980s and 1990s. Since then, it is best known for offering a warm and interesting “aesthetic”.

Pepe the Frog- A frog best known for saying “Feels Good Man” earlier on, was later used by certain Right-wingers and has since been touted as a symbol of hat. But, with a smug grin like that, it appears that he doesn’t seem to care about what others say.

Social media- It already played a massive role from the mid-2000s-onwards, but now, the scale of social media has grown exponentially, with people moving away from mainstream news and entertainment and instead choosing to get their kicks on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and YouTube. This focus on gaining the news from social media has held some negative consequences as fake news continues to fool gullible Boomers.

Hyperbeast fashion- In terms of fashion, the Hypebeast is the late-2010s’ version of the Hipster, though unlike Hipsters, who are financially-independent rich kids who make questionable purchasing decisions, Hypebeasts are often preteen/teenagers who suck money out of the credit cards of their rich parents.

Adventure Time- A rather interesting cartoon that started off as a fun show to get high to, but evolved into a gripping epic with an expansive lore and interesting world.

Minions- While they were rather annoying to older viewers following their introduction in the otherwise top-tier film Despicable Me, children and especially 40-something year-old Facebook Mums couldn’t get enough of these wacky tic-tacs.

Brexit- A subject that I, as a Brit, couldn’t seem to get away from in the past few years, as politicians refused to move forward with the people’s decision. But, with the Tory majority in Parliament, as depressing as that sounds, it seems possible that we can finally move on as a country to more important matters.

Vaping (Juul-smoking mouth)- Recovered chain-smokers and rebellious teens have made this trend a popular pastime, though its popularity has waned recently over health concerns.

Doge- Whilst it began as a singular image of a cartoonish-looking Shiba Inu making a weird face, as brightly-coloured Comic Sans surrounds her, this dog has become the subject of many surreal and unique memes, taking on many different forms, solidifying the transformative nature that all memes should strive for.

Hoverboards, Fortnite, Dabbing, and Fidget Spinners (The monstrosity on the bottom-right)- What do a handle-less Segway, a more cartoony (but somewhat better) version of PUBG, a dance based off of post drug-taking sneezes and small bits of metal for Autistic children have in common? They have all ascended to levels of annoying trends that at least some people have had fun with.

Undertale (Sans)- An interesting game that has gained a heavy degree of fame for its interesting themes and interesting characters, some of which have been admired a bit too much by certain teenage girls.

As for my personal experiences of this decade, I can say that, whilst I was born in the early-2000s, I was definitely raised in the 2010s. Much of my memories of the previous decade are rather minimal, and I didn’t follow that many trends considering I only lived on constant repeats of SpongeBob by the start of this decade. Since then, though I have gained many impactful memories from these past few years. Some good, some bad, some great, all of which were a part of growing up. In about two-weeks’ time, I will finally become a legal adult, and shall begin the rest of my life. So, I wish you all well, and hope your Twenties are truly roaring!

#2010s #2010s nostalgia #collage #retrospective

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peppersjam · 5 years

Text

My Top 10 Albums of 2019

2019 presented me with a handful of incredible events and memories (I turned 30, I got married, etc.), while also serving me a big challenge (my partner is temporarily living on the other side of the country). In a poetic world, these things would have a significant impact on the music that I listened to and loved, but no, not really. This year is pretty on the nose for me, music-wise. Oh, except that I got really into Taylor Swift in the second half of the year.

Before we hop into boring Steve's boring top 10 list, let's revisit the 2018 list. The only album on the list that I barely listened to in 2019 was Cardi's Invasion of Privacy. Everything else gets at least semi-regular spins, although I'd elevate Historian, boygenius, and Big Red Machine above these others.

My biggest disappointment this year was Charli XCX's CHARLI, which is a solid album, but it didn't grab me nearly as much as Pop 2 did a couple years ago. It hasn't stuck in my rotation.

Runners up:

Bon Iver - "i,i" (I love it when I listen to it, but for some reason I'm not often compelled to listen to it)

Ariana Grande - "thank u, next" (Staple of early 2019, but fell off)

Carly Rae Jepsen - "Dedicated" (Great, but I'd rather listen to E•MO•TION)

Taylor Swift - "Lover" (Some true standout tracks, like Lover and Paper Rings, but too many cloyboys and CRJ rip-offs)

Weyes Blood - "Titanic Rising" (I could see this growing on me over the years, like a Radiohead record)

And the pre-2019 albums that should've made my respective yearly lists:

Beyoncé - "4" (2011)

Beyoncé - "BEYONCE" (2013)

Big Thief - "Capacity" (2017)

Big Thief - "Masterpiece" (2016)

Perfume Genius - "No Shape" (2017)

Snail Mail - "Lush" (2018)

Taylor Swift - "Red" (2012)

10. Big Thief – U.F.O.F

Early in the year, I "discovered" Big Thief. I don't know how I missed them before. Specifically, the song "Masterpiece" got right up in my brain and has been hanging out there since. Then Big Thief gave us U.F.O.F. which was yet another great Big Thief album. See #3 below.

9. Andrew Bird – My Finest Work Yet

Look, I'll stop putting Andrew Bird records on my end-of-year lists when he stops making them.

Andrew Bird turned a corner with the release of Are You Serious where he basically acknowledged that he was now going to work with other people and write scrutable songs. It was a good album, but My Finest Work Yet refines this Andrew Bird 2.0 and delivers some of his... finest work yet ("Sisyphus," "Manifest," "Olympians"). While I still prefer earlier Andrew Bird (A Nervous Tic Motion into Fake Palindromes into Measuring Cups... my gosh, that's 10 incredible minutes of music), I understand why he's moved on to something else.

8. JPEGMAFIA – All My Heroes Are Cornballs

I've been in a rap rut. Kanye is putting out self-indulgent gospel albums. Chance and Drake are boring now. JAY Z is working with the NFL.

But the rut is mostly a lack of imagination on my part. There's a lot of rap out there that hasn't made it through my naive filter, and I want to seek more of it out in 2020. Case in point: JPEGMAFIA. He's weird, political, funny... all the things that the aforementioned rappers aren't (or at least, aren't anymore). All My Heroes Are Cornballs is the most hypnotic rap album I've listened to in years. The glitchy beats and effortless flow makes it impossible to turn off mid-album.

7. BROCKHAMPTON – Ginger

GINGER is a proper follow-up to the SATURATION trilogy. While Iridescence had some good tracks on it, the overall experience was jarring (not without reason, given what the group was going through with Ameer). GINGER reads (ok, plays) like an album in a way that the Saturations never did. While it may be spiritually linked to the Satursation, it's a complete departure sonically. Even though it's more constrained and less bombastic than their hits from that era, it feels much bigger and, ahem, More Important. That might not be to the taste of some of their fans, but I'm happy to have both versions of BROCKHAMPTON in my music library.

6. Lana Del Rey – Norman Fucking Rockwell!

Music publications couldn't get over the fact that on NFR!, Lana, yes LANA DEL REY, was wordsmithing at a high level. Is it that hard to believe that someone would become a better poet as they gained more life experiences, inching closer to the mystical 10,000 hours? Some of the praise may have gone a little overboard (and, frankly, seems rooted in a narrow, misogynistic view of Who Can Do Music Good™️™️™️), but I agree with the underlying principle of the praise: that this is a collection of well written and well performed songs. It has my favorite album closer of the year, "Hope Is a Dangerous Thing for a Woman Like Me to Have - but I Have It." I get chills just thinking about it.

5. Clairo – Immunity

I enjoyed my first listen.

On my second listen, I wondered if it was maybe too simple. I didn't listen again for several months.

But then, when I was working from Pittsburgh the week before Christmas, I listened again. And I couldn't stop listening. It's simpler music than many of the albums on this list, but it appeals to me for the same reason I had a fixation with Snail Mail's Lush this year: it's incredible that songs that sound so "simple" (and I truly do not mean simple in an insulting way) can still be different than anything we've heard before, and can still transfix us in new ways. Behold ye, the power of combinatorics!

4. Vampire Weekend – Father of the Bride

Channel Orange to Blonde was 4 years. There's nothing you can do to get your favorite artists to make music faster. There's some beauty in that... that if an artist is financially successful enough, they don't need to rush.

Modern Vampires of the City to Father of the Bride was 6 years (i.e., 20% of my lifetime). But at least there are no duds here, and "Harmony Hall" might sneak into my hypothetical favorite-songs-of-all-time pantheon.

3. Big Thief – Two Hands

Oh, but then a few months later, Big Thief gave us another album. They started working on it right after they finished U.F.O.F, which tracks based on every interview I've read with Adrianne Lenker. She talked about the insane touring and album release schedule they've been on in the past four years, but her point wasn't "I'm getting tired," but rather "let's see if I can do this forever." I saw them play at The Fillmore after they released Two Hands and I got the sense that Adrianne has to make and perform music. She was uncomfortable engaging in the standard nearly-identical pleasantries that artists share with the audience. She was shy. She was surprised to find that we were hanging on her every word and chord. It was relatable. She's the closest to a genius I've seen in an indie rock band in the last several years, although I'm sure she'd hate anyone calling her that.

That genius produced Two Hands, an affecting indie rock record that practically demands that you close your eyes because you need to experience it and only it.

2. Tyler, the Creator – IGOR

This year, I listened to IGOR over and over again. The hooks, verses, beats, and vibe are all infectious. Boring Steve says "hey, look, it's just a great album." I don't have a deeper thought about it. I eagerly await Tyler's next project.

1. Nilüfer Yanya – Miss Universe

This year, like 2009 a decade ago, was an exciting year to be an indie rock fan. Vampire Weekend and Bon Iver cemented their elder ("elder") statesperson statuses, Big Thief came into their own as a true force of nature, and acts like Clairo and Nilüfer made me extremely jazzed about the Ghost of Indie Future.

Nilüfer has a unique and delightful voice that punches through some really fun songwriting and arrangements. Like, what a dumb, awesome lyric:

Although I cannot tell if I'm paranoid

Or it's all in my head, it's all in my head

Miss Universe is her debut full-length album, and it's a lovable and off-kilter thesis statement for what I assume will be a lovable and off-kilter music career. I can better explain why some of the other albums on this list are great, but suffice it to say, the system rewards unique performances.

#big thief #andrew bird #jpegmafia #brockhampton #lana del rey #clairo #vampire weekend #Tyler The Creator #nilufer yanya #beyonce #perfume genius #taylor swift #snail mail #bon iver #ariana grande #carly rae jepsen #weyes blood #Charli XcX

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ecmlol · 5 years

Text

“ it’s ok . Jude gets a little grumpy too at bed time” noah says

Jude pokes his head out of the freshly sprayed bathroom and give noah a look as to say really?.

“So where’s my birthday boy at Mr Hot mic.” Patty says in a flirty way.

Jude pokes his head out again.

“Well that sexy son of yours is getting his dental hygiene on at the moment.”noah says

“ oh ok then how is my handsome son in law.”

Jude is wondering why his mother is flirting with his husband as he spits and rinses his mouth.

“ ok ok I’m done you can stop flirting with my husband now don’t you have your own?” jude says

“ oh my god noah how do you put up with this jealousy issues.”

Noah sits up and pats the bed in between his legs so jude knows where to sit at.

“ I like it , it just apart of his love languages.”

Jude loves that noah gets him.

“ I will be worried when he stops being jealous.” Noah says

Jude smiles and takes a seat.

“There’s my beautiful baby boy”

Justice starts to sing happy birthday .

Noah and Patty starts to sings along. Jude starts to blush.

The singing ends

“Awwww are you blushing?” Patty says

“ no ..”

Noah kisses his shoulders.

“ it’s ok if you are Dane “ noah whispers against the side of Jude’s head.

“ it’s just I haven’t had anyone sing me happy birthday in a long time.” Jude says quietly as he wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

Zero didn’t do birthdays so he never did anything for his.It was just a nother day.

Noah wraps his arms around jude and hold him closer to him.

Jude straightens ups and wipes his face again.

Jude sees that Justice has her Jude bear back.

“ how did you get your bear back?”jude ask

“I got it in the mail today”Justice says

“ it came with the nicest apology note from Brandon too”patty adds

“ wow isn’t that great Jude “noah says

“ yeah wow that’s awesome “ jude says

“ he explained everything jude . It was a accident baby.”

“Do you believe him”jude ask

“ yes I do,think hes being sincere baby”

“ ok”jude leans back and sighs.

“ baby we have to go it’s getting late and this one need to go to bed.”

“ thanks for calling”jude says

“ your welcome baby I love you so much”Patty say

“ bye jude bye noah “Justice say

Jude and Noah both say good bye and hang up

Noah isnt ready to let jude go just yet.

“ what are you thinking about?”

“ Brandon.”

“ want to talk about it.”

“ maybe I’m wrong about him maybe Brandon really is having problems with the whole split personality thing.”

“ you really thing your dad would lie?”

“ it’s Oscar “

“ the same guy that came to the wedding and helped you with eve and to keep the Devils. Prison changes people. Sometime for the better.”

“ true maybe he really has changed. He hangs out with your dads which is weird what could they even be talking about.” Jude say

“ maybe they are teaching him about being a good parent.”

“ your dads do seem awesome despite them not exactly liking me”

“ they never said they didn’t like you. You just aren’t what they expected.”

“ from the looks of them they are pretty opposite.”

“ true they are blue collar white collar pops is a artist and my dad a foodie ,one likes sport the other would rather watch cooking shows.”

“ ok well I have my whole life to change there view of me”

“ I wish you would stop thinking there is something wrong with how they see you. You are uptight Jude . The giant bottle of half used lube proves that and there is nothing wrong with being a walking talking wound tight, tight ass person .I love it . I just hope you don’t have a heart attack or anything because of it.”

Jude frowns

“ not funny noah “

Noah kisses Jude’s pouted lips.

“ your so adorable when you pout.” Noah kisses him again.

“ no I’m not”jude says

“ so it’s your birthday what would you like seeing you have everything. Your favorite car the team..”

“ I don’t know I’m pretty happy with everything in my life.” Jude say with a small smile on his face

“ ok I guess I can’t really buy you anything. So how about 15 kisses and 15 birthday spankings.”

“ oh 15 that’s it?”jude smile.

“30 total”

“ oh so you are being stingy with your affection huh?” Jude crosses his arms and acts like he’s offended.

Noah laughs

“ I’m being stingy huh?”

“ yeah you are “Jude says in a challenging tone.

Noah gets up and playful shoves Jude to his side of the bed . Jude lands face down and his butt facing Noah.

Smack! Jude smiles and jerks a little.

“ one”

Smack .smack .smack .smack

“5”

Noah smirks to him self and loses his shirt and boxers and lays in bed

“ hey that was only five”

“ it’s only 1218 am I have a whole day to tap that ass and kiss you.”noah says before kissing Jude’s cheek,jaw,nose, temple and forehead. Noah lays down and he can feel jude glaring at the back of his head.

Jude clears his throat.

“ yes my Dane can I help you?” Noah turns over to look at Jude.

“ thank you I the little spoon tonight remember ” Jude lays down and wiggles him self as close to noah as he can.

“ goodnight” jude say

.Two can play that game. Jude thought to himself.

Noah smiles to himself and wraps a arm around jude and buries his face in Jude’s pillow.

“ love you my Dane happy birthday ”

“ love you more .Jude smile and rolls his eyes.

The next morning Jude is woken up to the smell of bacon in the air .

Noah walks in sweaty wearing his gray cut off sweat pants and a red tank top.

“ raise and shine birthday boy.”

“ wow breakfast in bed?”

“Yes its all most done” noah walks over and kisses Jude’s neck.

“ six”

Noah kisses jude 4 more times on his neck and on his forehead.

“ 10”

Jude groans.

“ what ?”noah say innocently

“ you know what “ jude says as noah tries to retreat form the bed.

Jude grabs him by his hand and pulls him back.

“Wooh “ noah falls back into Jude’s lap

Noah smiles. Jude cups Noah’s face and kisses him on the lips.

“ 11,12,13”

“ no I kissed you so that doesn’t count “

“ fine”noah rolls Jude on top of him and kisses jude kiss more passionately this time and then gets up.

“13”

“ hope this breakfast come with a quickie.” Jude shout s as noah runs out the bedroom.

“If we have time”noah say

“ Jude hops up and heads to the bath so he can ambush noah in the kitchen

As Jude finishes up in the bathroom he can now smell cinnamon. Cinnamon is one of his favorite.

Jude peeps into the kitchen it’s a bit of a mess and see noah bent over and is pulling something that smells like heaven out.

Jude sneaks behind noah.

“ what are you doing?”noah looks up and see jude ‘s reflection in the oven door.

Jude hops up on the only clean part of the counter and lays down. He tries to act cool and tries to pose casually.

As noah dips the cinnamon goodness in butter and then in cinnamon and sugar Jude tries to be sexy and almost falls off the counter.

“ Dane please don’t kill yourselves trying to be sexy because you my Dane are sex on two legs to me “

Noah places the cinnamon goodness on a plate. Noah turns and almost drops the plate. Jude is laid out naked with bacon only covering his bits and pieces with a piece of bacon hanging out of his mouth.

“So .... quickie?”jude said mumbles around the bacon

Noah puts the plate down.

“Bring those with you “Jude say after he finishes the bacon in his mouth.

A hour and a half later.

At the arena.

Lionel is on the phone with Eve and German who are at the airport.

“ Has The cake arrived yet?”Eve asked

“ yes final it better be good.im glad I texted noah to stall Jude from coming to work too early “Lionel said. Lionel didn’t tell them she meet Brandon today and she thought she’d have to kick Noah’s ass for a second. She figured it out when she called Noah to chew him out.

“Hey Lionel we have to go I see them.” German says

They quickly say their good byes and hang up.

Lionel hangs up and turns around. The first thing she sees is jude half dress and then Noah who is in the same messy shape. They are both smiling and eating something.

“ Are my socks in your pockets?”Noah ask

“ maybe give me a second. this would have been easier if we had a bigger car.” Jude says . They have been talking about it but noah doesn’t want a new car because it’s paid for and Jude doesn’t want to give up his car because he like Porsche so much. noah thinks his car is big enough for a family .

“ we have been talking about it. do you have a pair of underwear in your pocket too I’m free balling it and it’s not a good look“ noah asked as he is putting his belt on. Noah doesn’t want to sound irritated about it.

Jude starts to pull out one sock and two ties but no underwear.

“No underwear but I have two ties”

“Ok that works. Don’t worry about the underwear I think I have a extra pair in my office you never know when you might need it.”noah says thinking about last night stomach issue.

Jude final puts his suit jacket on .

“ I think I have cinnamon and sugar on the back of my neck”

“ oh your lucky thats the only place you have it at my balls feel gritty “noah say

Jude couldnt help but to laugh and think about eat a part of his breakfast off of Noah.

They are half way to Lionel now.

“ do I look ok?”jude says

Noah fixes Jude’s hair a little.

“ perfect . What about me ?“noah ask

Jude dust off Noah’s face and shirt

“ ok your good now”

“ wait your shoes look funny.”noah tell jude

Jude looks down.

“ what’s wrong with them?”

“ you have my other shoe and I have yours .” Noah kicks off Jude’s shoe and Jude does the same.Then they swap shoes.

“ ok I have to go.” Noah say after a quick kiss and a quick slap on the ass.

“ 25”noah says as he walks away.

Lionel nods to Noah.

“ well happy birthday to my favorite ex step son.” Lionel say with a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“ thanks I can’t wait to get this over with I hate being interviewed and I hate talking to large crowds ”

“ unless it’s noah ? Right?”lionel says

“ exactly it’s easy with him but I don’t think he’s working for the local news channel.

“No but he will be someone that interviews you today.

Lionel and Jude start to walk toward the court.

“ do I even want to know why you’re late?”

“ I’m sure you can guess.” Jude smiles

Minutes later Jude is at center court welcoming everyone to family day.

The first one of Noah’s videos starts to play on the Jumbotron . All of the rookies appear and Noah is interviewing them. The video is called who’s new in devilnation. Jude and Lionel are off to the side watching the video.The next video is all about the old player there is a birth announcement, an pregnancy announcement, and a engagement announce.

The screen goes black

“ and here’s your wedding video”lionel tells jude.

The Jumbotron goes dark and the first pictures of their of their wedding pop up. First the out side of the chapel with there wedding date comes on the screen.

Out of no where noah appears at Jude sides.

“ hey”

“ hi”

Noah Jude and Lionel are standing side by side watching the video.

“ I don’t think I have ever seen you smile so much or so freaked out“Lionel tells jude.

“ freak out?”noah asked jude

“ I thought you changed your mind.”

“ what !I was only like a few minutes late” noah leans in and says.

“You know how I get some times. Can we not talk about this while I’m trying to enjoy your master piece” jude says as he elbows noah.

“This was the best day of my life right next to getting the devils.” Jude says

Noah smiles.

“It was my favorite day too. And it was perfect.”noah says

“ ab-so-freakin-loty”jude finds Noah’s hand and holding it. The warmth of Noah’s hand helps jude calm his emotions.Jude takes a deep breath and wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

The video is over and the screen goes black.

A pretapped message from noah comes up.

“ hey big guy. I just wanted to tell you how happy I am to be able to wake next to you everyday. So devil nation join me in wishing the king of la and my amazing husband a happy 30th birthday!

The Jumbotron lights up and the words for happy birthday come on .

The whole arena starts to sing.

“ close your eyes”noah tells jude

“ what?”

Noah covers Jude’s eye and they shuffle around.

Noah removes his hands from Jude’s eyes

About 60 feet away there is a devils backdrop and one of the largest cakes Jude has ever seen. The cake is made to look like the arena and the parking lot. They even have toy cars in the parking lot.There is enough cake for everyone in the arena.

Jude looks at noah and smiles.

Jude takes Noah’s hand closes his eyes and makes a wish. Jude opens his eyes and sees his father mother , and both his father in-laws walking around the back drop.

“ so are you surprised?” Lionel says

“ very” Jude’s says as he watche both his parent coming to toward him from two different sides.

“Hey baby”patty says

“ son”oscar says

Jude turns toward his dad and takes a step. Oscar reaches out and pats him on the shoulders. Oscar smiles and then awkwardly hugs him.

“ you have made me a very proud man.”oscar says

Jude didn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know how long he has waited to hear him say that.

“ thank you”so far today has been the best birthday that Jude can remember.

Jude gets tapped on the shoulder.

“ Jude “ patty hugs Jude tightly around the neck and kisses his cheek.

“ I can’t believe you’re both here.”

“ it wasn’t easy” Lionel say

Jude turns to Lionel

“ thank you”

“ well this was a group effort” noah says.

“ we all helped” German says pointing to Eve.

If this was a way Eve was trying to get into good graces with jude then it is working.

“ thank you”

Noah’s camera man is hovering around to catch any great moment of Jude’s birthday celebration.

“ can I get a few pictures of you and your family “ Jeremy ask jude

“ sure I definitely want a copy of the ones with my parents and me . I need proof that miracle are real.” Jude says with a smile. Jude is going to frame the picture and it’s going to be the first thing that goes on the baby’s wall .

In the middle of a picture with just jude and his dad something yanks at his pants leg.jude jerks a little and looks down between his legs.

Justice pokes her head out from under the cake table.

“ surprise!”

“ hey “ Jude bends down and pulls her from under the table.

Justice laughs at jude lifts her in the air and then puts her down.

“ I totally forgot she was under there “ patty say with embarrassment written all over her face.

“ Stellar parenting Patricia” Oscar says

“ oh no “ noah say under her breath.

“ after pictures Oscar go to you’re corner.” Lionel says

German and eve stood proudly next to Lionel .

“ your feisty .”patty says

“ yes she is “ German say.

Jude tells Justice to go hang with their mom while he finishes taking pictures with Oscar.

A few minutes later Jude is done with taking pictures for the arena.

Jude walks over to the small crowd of friends and family.Jude’s father in laws are first to greets him.

“ happy birthday Jude “Chester says as he gives Jude a bear hug.

“ happy birthday son” marshal says with a hug that reminds him of Noah.

“ thank you guys for coming”jude say. At the moment jude is a little overwhelming.

“ your welcome when Noah told us about it we couldn’t miss it.”Marshal says

“ The three of us flow in together. Thank you for the invitation Noah” Oscar

“ not a problem.” Noah say

“ why don’t you all go and enjoy family day” jude suggest

German and eve head off telling lionel that they will see her later.

“ Jude I was hoping to spend some times with you and give you your birthday gift.”

“ you got me a gift?”Jude says in complete shock.

“ i have a few interviews in about .” Jude checks his watch.

“In 10 minutes we can talk after?”

“ of course jude . Go. Meet me outside on the loading dock afterward Jude”

Patty rolls her eyes

“ loading dock?”jude says

Oscar walks away before answering Jude’s question .

Jude looks at noah and mouths loading dock?Noah smiles and shrugs.

“ trying to make up for lost time with expensive gifts isnt going to change things.Bastard” Patty says out loud to herself.

At the moment Jude feels like he’s on the spot and it make him feel like he is off his game. Jude all ready has a lot on his plate with the new season , his brother lurking around and the baby on the way . Having his parents feuding isn’t helping anything.

“ and get sober starting a whole new life isn’t going too erase past either.” Jude says and walks away leaving Patty shocked and unsure what to do or say

“ Mom I want some cake please.”justice say pointing to the cake that is being cut not to far from where they are standing. Patty blinks and focus on her youngest.

“Of course sweetie we can get you a piece.

Noah follows after Jude

“ hey you ok?”

“ was all of this your idea?”jude asked

6 notes · View notes

thedeaditeslayer · 5 years

Photo

Bruce Campbell exclusive on reboot of Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for Travel Channel.

Fan favorite actor Bruce Campbell is executive producer and host of the reboot of Travel Channel’s new series Ripley’s Believe It or Not!

Filmed inside Ripley’s warehouse, each segment is a thorough concise look at unique individuals who blow people’s minds with their gifts. It runs the gamut from physical exceptionalism to flat-out death-defying deeds. Steering this eye-candy-licious ship is Campbell.

Over the film and television career of actor Bruce Campbell, we have loved his take on horror roles (Ash Williams in The Evil Dead franchise), perfectly honed dramatic characters (President Ronald Reagan on Fargo), and most recently as the critically acclaimed developer Gary Green in a three-episode arc on AMC’s Lodge 49.

Of course, Burn Notice fans loved him as Sam Axe, and legions of Starz’ Ash vs. Evil Dead fans are bereft over Ash’s recent cancellation and demise there.

This latest venture for Campbell sees him entering the production side of TV as well, and his instincts are dead-on accurate for what reality TV watchers want, well crafted true stories with no wasted frames, lots of heart, and plenty of jaw-dropping reveals.

We screened the premiere episode and were completely riveted to the tales.

Ohio native Rick Smith flicks playing cards at lethal speeds while dreadlocked Dai Andrews can swallow curved swords and live to talk about it. Tyler Scheuer takes it on the chin — literally — as he balances heavy odd objects.

Toronto native “Twisty” Troy James is a handsome contortionist who has worked in many TV shows (FX The Strain, CW’s The Flash) and movie roles, with his mentor Roberto Campanella referring to him as a “natural talent” and a “walking talking natural effect.”

The 10-episode, hour-long series is inspired by Robert Ripley’s love of the extraordinary in humanity, and Campbell is a good steward of this. We spoke to Campbell by phone yesterday for a fascinating interview:

Monsters & Critics: I’m incredibly jealous of you.

Bruce Campbell: Why is that?

M&C: Well, the Ripley’s Warehouse. You got to work in it… and poke around.

Bruce Campbell: Oh yes… I’ll never tell. I’ll never tell the secrets that I saw.

M&C: But what was the standout item that was a jaw-dropper for you?

Bruce Campbell: Well they always rotate displays. They had a [President Donald] Trump in the foyer. They had a life-size Trump. So I got a thumbs-up picture with that. So I’ve had a picture taken with a president.

They also had a life-size replica of the tallest guy ever. And when they do that, that’s different than a photograph. And they have all these great craftsmen that work in the warehouse doing prosthetics and doing these life-size replicas of things. And when you see that life-size of the tallest man ever, you go, “How does anyone get that big?” It really puts it in perspective.

So stuff like that was cool. I’m a sucker for enormous, oversized objects.

M&C: I think I saw that in the background on the premiere episode…

Bruce Campbell: Oh yeah, it’s hard to hide that guy.

M&C: I love that you’re serving as host, but you’re also wearing the executive producer hat. I’m sure someone like yourself, with a bazillion fans from every level, gets pitched a million things. Who contacted you? I know that you were aware of Ripley’s and you liked it as a kid…

Bruce Campbell: Oh, of course. Things come across your desk. They tracked down my agent, and then he throws it at you and you either ignore it or say yes, or no, or maybe.

And Ripley’s, soon as they said that, I’m like, “Okay, I’ve heard of that.” And, “Who’s it for?” “Travel Channel.” “Okay, I’ve heard of that.” So they were two for two, and that’s helpful.

I knew Ripley’s and I was fascinated by a lot of that stuff anyway. I felt it’s a pretty good fit for the Evil Dead crowd because we’re basically talking about people who live on the edge … these people who push it.

So it’s pretty good. It felt right. And the Travel Channel … it’s not your father’s Travel Channel anymore. So it’s a good fit for Travel Channel because they’re doing all these crazy, creep investigations now and stuff. I think it fits it right in.

M&C: Dovetailing on what you said earlier, I think we’re all fascinated with the human body. So much good, bad and otherworldly can happen in the human form; and afflictions, to gifts, talents.

Bruce Campbell: To DNA glitches.

M&C: Yes, exactly. And I think that that’s an interesting thing that the show… we don’t have “the freak show” anymore… but Ripley’s show, you’re kind of bringing back a Victorian freak show but in a much more humane and cerebral context...

Bruce Campbell: Well we don’t use the F-word anymore. We don’t, not in our Ripley world. Because you’ve got your ordinary people, and that’s you and me and our neighbor.

These people really are the extraordinary, beyond ordinary. What we’re doing is, we’re celebrating it. And my job as a producer… My input was tone.

So that you’re celebrating people who’ve overcome challenges; they are achieving great achievements just through tenacity and practice and focus. And a lot of life lessons in here. So the takeaway is very positive.

If it’s different from any other incarnation, it would be that — that people are not on parade.

Now granted, [there’s] no shortage of eye candy. There’s going to be a lot that’s going to make your eyes pop out. But in context, we want you to get to know these people, to understand, and in some cases respect their decisions.

M&C: Right. Each segment was really well-rounded for the time beat that it was, and you gave really good backstory. And it showed how people were prospering and making great livings, and absolutely celebrating their uniqueness. I like that you do that.

Bruce Campbell: It’s an incredibly dense hour. It’s a small hour. It’s like six or seven stories per hour. It’s crazy.

M&C: Yes. The first episode, Rick Smith with the flying lethal playing cards…The fact that he could lethally dismember someone’s finger…

Bruce Campbell: Yeah. He’ll kill you! At a press conference, he could kill you. He could kill you at a press conference. By the way, we’re going to try to drag some of these folks to conventions.

Because I told them, I said, “Look, this is what I do. You’ve got to…” How many boring movie panels have you witnessed, you know? Oh, it was very hot that day. Yes, my suit didn’t fit right. And we thought that was funny. “No, let’s get a panel of Ripley’s participants. I’ll give you a panel.” So we’re going to San Diego Comic-Con. We have a panel coming on, that Saturday.

M&C: You know it’s going to be standing-room-only. People are going to be hanging from the rafters…

Bruce Campbell: Well, it’s the right fit for that crowd too. And look, this is not Marvel. This is real, folks. These are real superheroes, for the most part.

M&C: When you look at your career, characters like Ash Williams, and Sam Axe… and then you’ve done very serious stuff in Fargo, and you had a great part in Lodge 49, which is a fun series. What kind of roles do you enjoy the most?

Bruce Campbell: Just mix it up. I think the fun is mixing it up. Because from Detroit, my hometown, as a factory worker you would hope that they had a thing called “job rotation.”

You’re putting tires on one week; next week, they move you to fenders; next week, you’re putting windows in. So you don’t go crazy. Because there’s a lot of rinse-repeat, in what we do. Television is done in a formulaic style, for the most part, at a certain speed, certain pace. And you have to kind of fold in, and get used to that.

But over the years, it’s been fun to also to exploit opportunities when they come up. Take something that is a little more out of the box. I’m doing Peter and the Wolf in front of my local orchestra, at the Britt Festival, here in Jacksonville, Oregon, this summer. And I’m all giddy about it.

I’m like, “Okay, yeah. Let’s do something with an orchestra.” So I’m going to narrate Peter and the Wolf. It is fun to actually live where you live. To participate. Because you can go hide, that’s pretty easy. But nice thing is, where I live, my neighbors… they could so give a crap about who I am or what I’ve done.

A neighbor… the week I moved in, he was a rancher across the street… he comes up the driveway. He goes, “I understand you’re a cowboy in a TV show.” I said, “Yes sir, I was.” He goes, “You know how to ride?” I said, “I think so.” He goes, “You want to help me run a hundred head of cattle up the road on Saturday?” I’m like, “Yeah, if you’ve got a horse.” “Yeah, I’ve got a horse.” I’m like, “Okay.”

So I met him on a Saturday. Met all the neighbors. We helped him run a hundred head of cattle up the road. And, there you go. I was a member of the neighborhood.

What’s nice is, you can actually just get out. As an actor, you actually don’t have to hide. Some actors spend way too much time hiding. I hide in plain sight. I’m behind you at the post office. I’m the guy with the cat hair all over his jacket.

M&C: Switching gears. So obviously I’ve trolled your Twitter feed. I’m looking for MK11 clues like everyone else…

Bruce Campbell: Oh, it’s gotten out of hand. It’s gotten completely out of hand. Here’s the absolute truth of it all: I’m a bad liar. So, here’s the truth of it.

There is an Evil Dead game that’s coming out. And it’s a fully immersive game. It’s going to be very intense. And we hope to be absolutely mind-blowing, like some new game.

But in the meantime what happens is, Evil Dead’s been reintroduced. Ash vs Evil Dead sort of made it relevant again. And there’s a lot of requests just to have Ash pop up, like a guest star, in a movie, or on a TV show. Have him pop up and do some crap.

So Dead by Daylight was pretty much that. Pop up, do a thing. But people thought that (a) I was a liar that, “Oh, I thought you were retiring Ash.” And then (b) that, “Oh, I guess Ash is now in this game,” like he was a fully immersed player.

And we started to see the ads for it like that. We were like, “Ahh, don’t misconstrue this.” I’m just popping in literally, saying like a dozen lines. Like, “Hey, come on baby,” or whatever. And he may pop up in other games.

M&C: Yes. Well, Mortal Kombat 11 (MK11). That’s where all the chatter is landing.

Bruce Campbell: It is.

M&C: And?

Bruce Campbell: Sure. Well, I would have to say that I can’t say anything officially. They have alluded to it because there’s a little chainsaw revving at the end when they allude to new characters. So there’s nothing I can say, but I can say that Ash has popped up in other games. And if he does pop up in this one, it’ll be in the same fashion.

It would be like a blink-don’t-miss it or load him for a quick little run at this, you know?

We’re saving full Ash. Full Ash is coming. We hope that this is just a warm-up, honestly. We’re actually doing it because… We’re saying it’s okay to do because it’s just sort of whetting people’s appetite for playing a game as Ash, which can be fun.

He’s a big trash talker. And he’s one of the few flawed heroes. He’s like you. He’s like your neighbor being a hero. It’s like you being a hero, just you putting a chainsaw on your arm. That’s what I think is cool.

M&C: It’s like giving a monkey a razor blade. Not a good idea.

Bruce Campbell: (laughs) Totally! Exactly. That’s dangerous. Give him a switchblade. That’s a better image. Like he pops it out, “Let’s go. Let’s rumble.”

M&C: Right. Your fans are something. Do the men meltdown easier than the women when they meet you in person? When I read interviews by fanboys who can’t hide it, it’s kind of cringey.

Bruce Campbell: It was mostly fanboys. My wife was always, “You have fun on your tours, with your fanboys.” Because she knew there was going to be no hotel-room keys being thrown my way because the demographics were like 90% guys.

And I’ve watched it go to 75-25. And now it’s basically 50-50, as far as fandom. And I’m saying that across the board, not just for me per se. Fandom is out of the closet. Geeks are out of the closest. The industry is currently run by geeks. It’s all good. It’s just, everything’s out of the closet now.

Our proof of our love of entertainment is out of the closet now. There’s more conventions than there ever have been, by 10 times. And the amount of TV that we actually binge is 10 times than we thought we were binging. It’s amazing.

M&C: To me, Ripley’s is almost like a history lesson, but time-traveling into the modern day…new stories…

Bruce Campbell: Well it’s seeing humans… What can the human body do? Question mark. What can it do? And this show answers some of those questions, in an amazing way. Blind kid just wants to ride his bicycle, just like another kid. Right?

He learns to echo-locate like a bat. Because bats fly around and go “click click,” little clicks, and it bounces off of the objects that they’re flying around. They can know how far away it is. Kid saw a bat do that. He was like, “Wait a second. I’m going to do that.”

So he starts clicking and bouncing sound off of buildings, and even trees. He knows how close they are, alleyways. And dog on it if he doesn’t learn how to ride a bike. And he gets so good at it, he’s teaching other blind kids how to do it so they can just ride a frickin’ bike. What a great story, what a great story.

Everything has to be a car accident, you know? These are really… I’d say 92% of our stories are uplifting.

M&C: Well I like you’re producing ethos. I hope you produce more interesting television, because boy, we sure could use it.

Bruce Campbell: Well I think you can have interesting and entertaining, and uplifting, at the same time, without even trying to be uplifting. If you pick the right subject matter, it is its own story. So these people are amazing. I hope the world can meet a lot of these people. I can’t wait to meet them. I haven’t met them.

M&C: Wow. Comic-Con. That’s going to be amazing. You’re going to be on a panel with them.

Bruce Campbell: Oh, yeah. It’ll be the first time for a lot of these people.

M&C: You’re known as a character actor, with these leading-man good looks, and you’ve aged really well. By the way, you look amazing. Whoever’s styling you and doing your hair, and suiting you up for the show gets an A. You look terrific.

Bruce Campbell: I’ll pass the word along.

M&C: No, you really do. You’re like the opposite of [Burn Notice] Sam Axe. You’re a sharp-dressed man as ZZ Top says. But who’s your favorite character actor?

Bruce Campbell: Jack Carson.

M&C: Who? Jack Carson?

Bruce Campbell: Yep, and that’s exactly… The response that you had is the one that I always get. “Who?”

But Jack Carson is your neighbor, he’s a cab driver, he’s the bartender. He plays a lot of the same characters, but he’s sort of the everyman. And he’s a guy that, you see him in a movie and you go, “Oh, that guy. I like that guy.” He’s not the steak. He’s the sizzle.

So that’s fun. There’s definitely guys that I look up to and go, “Who is that guy?” Because the guy had a great… worked forever.

#Bruce Campbell #Ripley's Believe it or Not

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timeagainreviews · 6 years

Text

The Doctor needs a medic!

Clarification: I did a little research after my article last week. That "sister," line from Arachnids was still getting to me. As an American living in the UK, I was unaware of the fact that head nurses were still called sisters, despite them no longer being nuns. So it turns out that the Doctor wasn’t implying she used to be a female, but rather than she was using sexist outdated language. Cool… cool. Can’t decide which is worse. I mean, she is a bit old. Perhaps she’s a bit old fashioned as well. I’d keep an eye on her if she starts reading the Daily Mail.

We’re now at the halfway point of the series. Five episodes in, and I would say this one was, if nothing else, fairly solid. "The Tsuranga Conundrum" may be one of my favourite episodes of the series thus far, and it’s a bottle episode! However, while Chris Chibnall wrote the episode, the alien threat in it was actually devised by writer Tim Price, so it was a bit of a group effort. It would appear, however, that the real antagonist of this story… is time.

In an odd way, the opening shot of the episode had me thinking of the previous "Arachnids in the UK," with its giant landfill. I almost wondered if they weren’t actually rooting around underground Sheffield. Instead we’re on a planet called "Seffilun 27," in what the Doctor refers to as a "junk galaxy." The planet seems to be covered in junk as far as the eye can see. I was reminded a bit of House from "The Doctor’s Wife," with all of the junk from discarded TARDISes lying around. The Doctor has Team TARDIS sweeping for junk she can use for unspecified Doctory stuff. Instead of finding the desired gadget, Graham discovers a sonic mine that lands them all in the hospital.

The hospital is your typical Doctor Who style futuristic building, all white and sleek. It’s what you’d expect, but there’s a bit more than meets the eye. The Doctor is the last to wake up and feels pretty awful. You can already tell it’s going to be a handicap for her throughout the episode. I was reminded of regeneration episodes where the Doctor is "still cooking," and has to deal with a bit of pain. Nothing really comes from the pain other than a bit of added suspense, which is all fine and good. This is not the only handicap the Doctor will face throughout the episode.

The two attending medics are Astos and Mabli. Both are young, attractive, and seem very capable at their jobs. The Doctor discovers from Astos, the head medic, that they have spent the last four days on a medical ship called the Tsuranga (as opposed to a hospital) on its way to a space station called Resus 1. This causes the Doctor to panic. She’s left her TARDIS behind on a junk planet, where people scavenge, and she’s "only just got it back!" However, Astos reminds her that the ship needs to reach it’s destination for the health and wellbeing of the ship’s passengers. It’s a reasonable argument and the Doctor can’t deny it.

Among the patients on the ship, other than the Doctor and her friends, is Eve Cicero, a famous pilot and general, accompanied by her brother Durkas and android assistant Ronan. There’s also a pregnant man named Yoss (YOSSSSS GAGA! Sorry, had to) who is about to pop. Eve has Ronan manipulating the less experienced Mabli to provide her with adrenaline blockers, all behind both Astos and her brother’s backs. Yoss’ species’ gestation period of about a week, hasn’t given him much time to come to terms with being a father. His anxiety is even further exacerbated by the fact that his pregnancy was the result of a bit of fun at a party. Ryan, who grew up with an absentee father, seems to latch onto this, despite his initial reaction to a pregnant man.

The Doctor can’t turn the vessel around to pick up her TARDIS as it’s locked in on a path, auto-piloted. It only seems to pick up people in distress along the way, acting as a space ambulance. To make matters worse, the ship will be detonated if anyone tampers with it, in case of a hijacking, which seems a bit extreme. Other reasons it may be detonated, would be for quarantine reasons, or if it posed a threat to anyone. Which seems like as good a time as any to introduce our alien threat- Item Seven Alpha Cubed, otherwise known as "Pting." (Probably named after the sound the hull of a ship makes whenever it turns up.)

This marks the second week in a row where the reveal of the baddie has made me react with an "Awww!" Look at that little face! What a little cutie. Sadly, that little cutie just caused the death of Astos, as it caused the escape pod he was inside to evacuate, and detonate. I’m not 100% sure why it actually detonated, even without life support. Is part of a ship’s life support system allotted to the not-exploding of things? Regardless though, the Pting isn’t really hostile like a Dalek is hostile, it just seems a bit hungry! It doesn’t seem to eat organic matter, though it makes a right meal of the Doctor’s sonic screwdriver. The cosplayer in me was worried I was going to have to order a whole new piece for a second, but it coughed it right back up! Though it no longer seems to work. Another handicap.

The Pting is a rather resilient little creature. General Cicero had encountered them before as one “massacred” her entire fleet. Their skin is toxic to the touch and unbreakable. It can survive the vacuum of space, and it seems to enjoy eating anything. Think of a mix between a tardigrade, a Gremlin, and Nibbler. The Doctor must stop it from destroying the life support (see: anti-exploding device), and also from alerting the people back on Resus 1 from detonating the ship as well. They also need to keep the little muncher away from the ship’s anti-matter generator, so the heat is on!

One of the things I’ve been paying close attention to this series is whether the companions are utilised properly. The decision to have three over the usual one is something of a self-imposed challenge. Writing for an ensemble is far more difficult than the usual duo. Even classic Doctor Who struggled to balance three companions at times. I mentioned previously Nyssa’s TARDIS naps. Graham gets a nice little moment where he questions Durkas as to why he’s looking into his sister’s medical records. His friendly, yet direct approach was as though he was channelling the Doctor. He seems to be taking her example to heart. Yaz gets put on guard duty with Ronan, protecting the anti-matter generator. And Ryan and Graham both get a bit of screen time as doulas helping Yoss through labour. I had my second "Awww!" moment when Yoss requested other men be there as support. It was cute, shut up.

While Yaz and Ryan were gathering up the people on the ship for an emergency meeting, they have a little heart to heart in a corridor. I couldn’t help but feel like this bit felt tacked on. The ship is in danger, and they stop to talk about how Ryan’s mum died. It stopped the momentum of the episode cold in its tracks. The only reason I can think they added it in at this point, was because they couldn’t think of a better place to put it. They needed to divulge Ryan’s backstory so they could tie it in with Yoss’ fatherhood. This seemed more of a writing choice than a directing choice. It’s fine, really, but not very graceful.

There were some really good Doctor moments in this episode. I loved her claim that she has a doctorate in Lego. It’s funny because in my classic-Who rewatch, I’m currently on "The Edge of Destruction," and the Doctor’s speech about anti-matter reminded me a bit of the First Doctor’s monologue about the formation of galaxies. I will say though, it fell short of some of the better Doctor monologues we’ve had in the past. Regardless, it was nice to see the Doctor nerd out on science and show her passion a little. My only real issue with the Doctor’s characterisation in this episode stems, once again, from her morality.

Chris Chibnall doesn’t seem to know what his Doctor’s stance on guns actually is. It’s not ok to shoot robots or dying spiders, but it’s way okay to shoot the Pting? Yaz and Ronan are both given staser guns to guard the generator. While I am glad to see such an old reference return (as well as the stethoscope!), I’m once again confused by what Chibnall considers an ok time to shoot something. Funnily enough, this episode is exactly how I think the Doctor’s attitude toward guns should be portrayed. Nothing can really kill the Pting, so it’s really tantamount to a Star Trek officer using a stun setting. But the main idea was that the gun was used as a defence, to protect life and because it was the best option. That should always be the Doctor’s attitude toward guns- are they the best option? The best hope? She’s a Doctor of hope, so of course, she always looks for the best option, but she’s not stupid either. In a lot of ways, that’s what she’s done this series when it comes to guns. But it’s in the dialogue where her aims get muddled. I agree with Chibnall. The Doctor should have a disdain for guns. Guns are the end of hope in most cases. But sometimes River shoots the Silence, Leela shoots some guys in a corridor, and the Brigadier holds off an invasion.

With Astos dead, it’s up to Mabli to take control of the situation, which in her case means considering what’s best for her patients. With Yoss in labour, she needs to help him deliver his baby. Wisely, she allows the Doctor to do what she needs to do to save everyone’s lives. With the Pting eating at the ship's systems, they decide they need to find a quicker way to get to Resus 1. They must fly the ship themselves, which will also alert the security protocols, causing it to detonate, but one thing at a time. The Doctor finds a way to bypass the ship’s auto-pilot and has Durkas, an engineer, build a makeshift neural interface with the piloting system. It’s revealed that due to her years of flying with a neural interface, Eve has developed a condition known as "Pilot’s Heart." Due to this, adrenaline has built up in her system. One big jolt could stop her heart and kill her. The Doctor offers to fly the ship, but Eve insists she’s the best woman for the job, despite the dangers involved.

Around this time Ryan and Graham are learning to rise to the occasion as doulas. Yoss is in full labour panic mode, and needs his guys there to cheer him on! Yaz and Ronan have to grapple with the Pting. After stunning it unconscious, Yaz wraps it in a blanket and bends it like Beckham down the corridor. Go Yaz! The Doctor enters the scene looking for the ship’s detonation device. Clearly, a ship in deep space is too far away for missiles, so the bomb must be onboard. It’s a bit contrived that such a device would exist, but the aforementioned reasons are fine. Whatever. Around this time, the sonic screwdriver boots itself back up, and the pieces all come together for the Doctor. The Pting isn’t eating matter, it’s eating energy.

The Doctor and Yaz locate the bomb and move it to an airlock. She speeds up the detonation so that the building energy attracts the Pting, and just before the device explodes, the Pting swallows it whole, with an adorable look of delight on its little face from the warm glow its tummy. Seriously, as Who monsters go, this thing is freaking cute. The Doctor ejects it from the airlock, and that’s two threats taken care of in one go. Two birds, one stone.

The imminent threat of piloting the ship still looms. While hooked into the interface, Eve was able to control the ship, despite the less than ideal conditions. But without any more adrenaline blockers onboard, her heart gives out on her. She dies a hero, but her work is unfinished. Durkas must now rise to the occasion as a Cicero. It’s more of a poetic solution than logical. Being related to a pilot somehow makes you a better candidate to fly the ship than the Doctor herself. But he does a fine enough job as he flies them to safety.

Yoss has his little boy, Avocado, and Ryan and Graham seem like they’re getting along, but Ryan leaves Graham’s fist bump hanging. And I gotta say, what the hell is Ryan’s deal still? I mean, come on man. He’s stopped asking you to call him granddad, but you could at least give the dude a fist bump. It’s getting to the point where I’m starting to think Ryan is being a bit of a dick toward Graham. Perhaps he’s closed off because the men in his life have abandoned him, but this is getting ridiculous. They’ve been through five onscreen adventures, and several offscreen adventures at this point. They’ve been through a lot, to put it lightly. Travelling with the Doctor should be far more of a bonding experience. While it is better to show than tell, Ryan’s standoffishness to Graham is getting old. Graham seems to take it in stride though. You’ve gotta give him credit for that.

Now on Resus 1, Ronan will probably shut down with nobody left to serve. Durkas apologises for not being kinder to him in the past. It’s weird that the Doctor doesn’t offer to take him to some sort of android planet or something. I kind of expected it. Yoss has decided to keep Avocado. Ryan, who was a big part in this decision, helped him come to grips with the idea of being a father by telling him that a father doesn’t need to be perfect, he just needs to be there. The Doctor and her friends are given assurances that they’ll be taken back to the TARDIS after they give their statements. The episode ends with Ronan reciting a kind of litany that Durkas, Yoss, and surprisingly the Doctor all know by heart. All in all, it’s not a bad way to leave the episode. In comparison to last week, there is far more of a feeling of resolution.

As I said, this episode was pretty solid. But one of the things I’m still holding out to see from this series is Jodie’s big "wow," moment. This is in no way me saying she has failed to wow me as the Doctor. I’ve not hidden my total joy over her performance. What I am waiting for is for the fury to come out. Christopher Eccleston spent a good chunk of his series being either sad, bossy, or silly. But when the episode "Dalek," came around, we got to see another side to his Doctor- his scary side! How about with the Tenth Doctor doomed the Family of Blood to an eternity of torture? Or how about when Eleven stared down his companions with intimidating eyes because he could see they were lying to him? I’m still waiting for Thirteen to get scary. We saw it come out in a microscopic amount when she warned Krasko not to threaten her. But I’m still waiting for that moment.

Thus far she’s been a rather friendly and forgiving Doctor. She’s shown more compassion than contempt. I’m waiting for one of the writers to give us a truly morally ambiguous moment of the Doctor. And no, having conflicting morality about guns doesn’t count! I was hoping that this episode would be the one. We would finally get that truly contemptible villain, and we’d get to see her dark side come out. If they’re going to make the brave decision of excluding Daleks and other classic baddies, we deserve a new one of the same calibre. What this episode gave us instead, was a pretty solid base in peril episode. I won’t fault it for not being the big evil monster I was hoping for, because what we got instead was pretty effective.

Again, we’re only halfway in. There’s plenty of time to up the stakes. We need a good dose of danger. I’d like to see some more planet threatening terror. We need more timeline meddling other than one racist pissing in the wind against change. But despite the lack of fear, this episode had one thing going for it above all else. This episode had a lot of heart. It may not have been a heart-stopping thrill ride, but in there were real moments of joy. Having a threat that was so cute was actually a welcome surprise. It wasn’t trying to be a big bad villain. Here’s to hoping that the second half of series eleven amps up the danger factor!

#Doctor Who #thirteenth doctor #jodie whittaker #chris chibnall #pting #ryan sinclair #yasmine khan #yaz #graham o'brien #the Tsuranga conundrum #series 11 #bbc #tardis #sonic screwdriver #time and time again

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angelinasway · 6 years

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Worlds Collide Part One

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Buffy Summers

Summary: How Buffy and Spencer first met

A/N: This is my first time posting on tumblr, so please give me a shout and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Dr. Spencer Reid was a man of science and he prided himself on that particular aspect of who he was. It was a very rare day when something could challenge his belief in the way he viewed the world. However, today was about to not only shake that foundation, today was the day that Dr. Reid’s world view was about to be obliterated. He just graduated from Quantico, and to celebrate decided to take a trip to Washington D.C. It was a place he had never been before, but a place he always wanted to see. Considering he would soon be working for the BAU, or at least he hoped. The truth was he hadn’t actually been assigned yet, but he figured getting in the sites and knowing the land marks for the country he would soon be serving was a step in the right direction. For a man such as himself, he supposed it was typical that the first place on his agenda was one of the most prestigious libraries in the U.S., the Library of Congress. He wondered how many books he would be able to read, while giving himself about five hours here. He quickly did the math in his head, and realized depending on the size of the book, he could read approximately six to twelve volumes. His excitement at the prospect for the knowledge he was about to imbue himself with doubled. That however, all changed the moment he saw her. She was beautiful, and to be quite frank, unlike any woman he had ever seen before. She was petite in stature, blonde with delicate features, but what drew his attention the most were her eyes. They were large and bright green, but so old and tired they didn’t look like they belonged in someone nearly as young as her. She walked with purpose up to the second floor and he suddenly found his feet following. It was very unlike him to pursue someone of the opposite sex. He had never had much luck in that department, but his curiosity had gotten the best of him and he couldn’t stop himself if he tried. He wondered why she was here? Was she like him? Was she someone who could get lost in the written word? He wanted to know what she would read, and if he had read it himself. He thought maybe he could find an opening to strike up a conversation with her if he could just find the right thing to say. When she pulled out her cell phone however, and he overheard the conversation she was having, Spencer Reid felt like his world was collapsing. At first he thought she was insane. Not necessarily the best description for someone with an obvious mental illness but what she was saying… Well, it was just crazy. He immediately went into profiling mode after that, everything he studied pouring out of his eidetic memory like a running faucet. Unfortunately, the more he listened, the less anything made any sense. It wasn’t until she put the phone on speaker that the rest of what he knew about the world shattered into a million pieces.

_____________________________________________________________

Buffy grunted in frustration as she removed a stack of large volumes from the book case. Her flip phone nestled snugly between her ear and shoulder. "So what exactly am I looking for again?" "You'll know it when you see it.” Came Giles cryptic response through the receiver. "You know," she grouched. "I was supposed to be on vacation." There was a sigh of frustration on the other line. "Buffy." "No seriously," She snapped, thinking how typical this was to her life. "I've spent years fighting battles, years being the only one. Is it too much to ask for a year off while some of the other girls pick up the slack?" She sighed, her voice taking on a pouty whine as she said. "Why do I always have to be the one to save the world?" "I do apologize, Buffy; however this mission can only be yours." Giles said sympathetically. "On the bright side this has nothing to do with saving the world, or at least not yet." "Yeah," She muttered slamming the books down on a nearby table with a little more force than necessary, "Yet, being the operative word." There was a chuckle on the other end of the phone and she rolled her eyes. “So how is it that the Founding Fathers had information on the Slayer line anyway?" "Well," Giles began. "According to the obscure reference I found in what was left of the Watchers archives, they've known about Slayers since John Adams. One of his daughter's was one." There was a long pause on the other line as something jogged in her memory. "Wait... You're telling me Abigail Adams was a Slayer?" "No actually, it seems her younger sister Susanna was." Giles responded. "But I thought she died?" Buffy said frowning as she walked back towards the bookcase. There was a long pause, before Giles made a choking noise on the line. "Buffy, did you actually just recite a historical fact?" She rolled her eyes. "Hardy, har, har. Very funny." She chuckled, as she removed some more books from the shelf. "Just making sure it's actually you." Giles countered, suspicion leaking into his voice. "Oh, calm down Giles, still the real girl here." She said setting the books down. She shrugged, "There was a special on the History Channel last week. I guess I just retain information better when it's on TV." She swore she could hear him polishing his glasses in aggravation at her comment. "Yes, well Susanna was a Potential whose parents gave her up to the Watchers Council after finding out her possible destiny." "I almost forgot about the original Councils old creepy ways." Buffy said making a face in distaste. "Please tell me we aren't keeping to that barbaric tradition. These girls need their childhood before they're thrown in the thick of things." "I have no desire to start training toddlers Buffy.” Giles voice taking on a tone that she knew well. He was about at the end of his rope with her. “We have neither the man power nor the means to take on such an endeavor. I think when the new generation starts popping up we will simply enlist the older generation and the Watchers we have to train them." “Well that’s good then.” She said, frowning when she couldn’t see anything in the area she just revealed. “Hold on, I’m gonna put you on speaker while I find this damn panel.” “Do you think that wise?” Giles asked, his voice now sounding in the small alcove. “I think that if anyone’s listening security's already on its way up.” She pointed out. “Touché.” He conceded. Buffy reached in her purse and pulled out the mini-flashlight she always stashed in case of emergencies. “Anything?” Her Watcher asked impatiently. “Hold your horses.” She snapped, removing some of the dust that had accumulated off the back panel of the book case. She frowned when she realized how warm the wood felt, her fingers feeling small grooves and indents along the otherwise smooth surface. It felt like some sort of symbol or wording carved in the wood. Buffy shined the flashlight, and froze. There, cut deep in the wood was the symbol she remembered being on the Guardian’s Crypt. “Giles,” She whispered. “Did you know?” “Pardon?” He asked, worry tainting his voice. “Did I know what exactly?” “Did you know this was about the Guardians?” She snapped a little more harshly than she intended. "The Guardians you say?" Was his response, "No, I did not. Hold on a moment Buffy." She could hear pages flipping as he double checked whatever he read in the book he discovered in what was left of the old Watchers building. "No, it simply says that the Americans had discovered something, possibly a text that could be useful to the Slayer. It says they were positive it was located on the second floor of the Library of Congress, but they didn't't know how to access it." He paused. "Then it gets less legible from here. If I'm reading this correctly it also speaks of a warrior for the light being born near the end of the twentieth century. She's supposed to turn the tide in the wars to come. Something about her being reborn thrice, once in death, once in earth, and once in life, but even that isn't the full text. He sighed, "I do apologize Buffy this manuscript is quite burnt. I'm having a hard time reading it. On the next page the only words I can distinguish are ‘healing a broken soul.'" There was a long pause as Giles flipped a few more charred pages. "And nothing else is legible after that." Buffy frowned, "So they knew." "Yes, it appears so." Giles muttered. "Do you..." She swallowed down the lump in her throat. "Do you think Travers didn't give us the four-one-one because of the way I treated the Council?" "It's highly unlikely." Giles said quietly, trying to soothe her fears. "It's much more plausible that Quentin didn't tell us to ensure that this…Well, I suppose, prophesy came to pass." Buffy shook her head, rubbing her eyes with her palm to stem off the tears she could feel building. This was just so typical of them. She never would wish death on anyone, but after everything she had been through, everything she had endured, and they knew, they knew her destiny better than she did. Well, let's just say she wasn't upset they were gone. "So," She said, pushing her emotions to the side. She would re-examine them later, preferably over a pint of chocolate peanut butter cup ice cream. "The reborn in earth is pretty obvious, considering how I had to dig myself out of my own grave." She paused, sighing. "I'm gonna go out on a limb and say the reborn in death has to do with the prophecy where the Master was supposed to kill me. I'm lucky that didn't take, though I would put that more in the category of beating death, not being reborn to it." "On the contrary Buffy, I believe the being reborn is exactly what you did. Think about it. Not only did you face the Master. You faced the prophecy and died, but your rebirth happened when you were resuscitated. The Slayer line was broken that day and a new Slayer was called." He paused, and she could hear the pride in his voice as he said, "You were amazing that day." "Yeah, you weren't so bad yourself." She said smiling. "So what do you think the reborn in life means, because right now I got nothing?" "Perhaps it was the calling of the Slayer's. We, in essence, breathed a new life into these girls." "That doesn't make any sense though. Willow did all that." She said frowning, while continuing her search for some sort of lever to pop open a hidden panel. "Yes, but your belief in her is what made that possible." He reminded her. "Or, it very well could be that it hasn't happened yet." "Great." she muttered, wondering how much more crap the Powers could drop on her shoulders. "Look Giles," she said, changing the subject. "I'm not seeing it. There's no lever, hidden panel, or button... Just nothing." She ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. "Are you sure this is the right one?" "I should think so, especially with the sigil for the Guardians carved into it." He paused, "Perhaps...Hmm... Is there any wording or fraise carved into the wood?" She shined her light again, running it along the back surface. This was so ridiculous, if someone caught her she could be put on a terrorist watch list or something. Okay, so she knew that was a bit dramatic, but she was definitely running the risk of being thrown into the psych ward for a three day observation. “No...Nothing.” She said stomping her foot in aggravation, and of course that’s when she noticed it on the upper right hand panel nowhere near the sigil itself. “Hey, wait...I see it. Hold on." She frowned squinting as she tried to read it. "Shit Giles, it's in Latin." "I can read that,” Came an unknown voice from around the corner. Buffy spun around, slamming her head in the process. She cringed in pain, grabbing the left side of her forehead. Why did it always hurt more when you did it to yourself? Then she looked up at the man who revealed himself. He stood there very obviously uncomfortable, and her jaw literally almost hit the floor. He was tall and slim with slightly messy light brown hair and eyes. He was especially geeky with his glasses and sweater vest, but the part that made her go all dear-in-headlights-catatonic was that he was gorgeous, absolutely drop-dead gorgeous. She quickly wiped her chin to make sure she wasn’t drooling. Did she mention he was gorgeous? "I mean..." He fidgeted. "If that's okay?" Buffy meant to answer; she really did, but the only coherent noise she could seem to produce was a strange sort of gurgling whimper. "What's your name Sir?" Giles came to her rescue, the amusement in his voice clear. He knew his Slayer too well. Reid shifted uncomfortably, looking at the ground. "Spencer... Dr. Spencer Reid, Sir." "A doctor you say," Was Giles response, his amusement growing by the minute. “Why you don’t sound much older than Buffy here?” "You would be correct. I’m twenty-two, and I’m not... That is to say, I’m not that kind of doctor, Sir. I have three PhD's, one from Cal Tech and two from Yale." He paused, adding. "I also have two BA's from Yale as well." "Good Lord!" Giles exclaimed. "My dear boy, you wouldn't happen to be in the market for a job, would you?" "I mean well... Um..." Spencer stuttered. "Giles, stop it." Buffy chided, finally coming back to herself in time to rescue him from her over enthusiastic Watcher. She met startled light brown eyes before he quickly looked to the ground again, crossing his arms over his chest in a pose that clearly stated how out of his element he was. "Hey," she said, walking slowly closer as if not to startle him. "Sorry about that, he gets excited when he meets someone as smart, or in your case, much smarter than him." There was an indignant huff over the phone, which she ignored. "So um... How much of that did you hear?" She chuckled awkwardly. "I bet you think we're both nuts, huh?" He shifted uncertainly, before finally saying, "Shared delusions are pretty rare, and usually one of the parties, the more dominate of the two, has obvious signs of psychosis. However, neither of you seem to show any signs of a psychotic break…" "Except for the part where we were talking about hidden books and prophecies," Buffy interrupted. "Well yes, there's that." Spencer conceded. "But neither of you seem to display the usual compulsion most people with a mental illness display." He paused for breath. "You in fact seem annoyed at the prospect of being here, and the nonchalance in which you address the situation, as if it's something you deal with daily. It leads me to believe that either you truly believe what you're saying, or it is in fact, the truth." "So..." Buffy said, "You don't think we're crazy?" "I... Well..." Spencer looked up again, this time holding eye contact and wetting his lips. "I haven't decided yet." He shrugged and added. "When you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.” Buffy raised an eyebrow, her lips twitching as she tried and failed to hold back a grin. "Did you just quote Spock?" His cheeks turned pink at her words, and he ran his hand through his short messy brown hair. "Actually, it was first quoted by Sherlock Holmes or more specifically the author, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Though I have to admit I'm pretty impressed you know Star Trek that well." Her grin broadened at his words, her eyes dancing with amusement. He was just too adorable for words. "Spencer, or would you prefer Dr. Reid?" She asked holding out her hand in a show of good faith. "Name’s Buffy, Buffy Summers." On a normal day Spencer would be quite averse to shaking someone's hand, but today was apparently a whole new day for firsts. He reached out hesitantly, his long slender fingers closing around her delicate looking ones. The first thing he noticed was how strong her grip was, he swallowed, realizing that if she wanted to she could probably crush the bones in his hand without blinking an eye. The second thing was the scars all over her fingers and hand. Her palm as well as the area between her thumb and pointer finger also had a large callous typically seen on swordsmen. He stared at her a long time, beginning to believe more and more that they were both telling the truth. "Spencer will be fine, Miss Summers" He said quietly. Buffy smiled deviously. "And you can call me Buffy; otherwise I'll feel like I'm in trouble." Spencer smiled then, a real true smile. "Okay, Buffy then." "And never underestimate a girl who knows her pop culture." She added with a laugh and a wink. "Though, just between you and me, I probably wouldn't have remembered had I not recently spent three weeks in Rome with a super nerd by the name of Andrew Wells." His face fell at her words, so she quickly added, "I never realized there was so much sexual tension between Spock and Kirk until I watched it with him." Spencer frowned in confusion for a moment, before it dawned on him exactly what she was trying to say. He blushed even more when he realized she was hinting at being unattached. "I..." His voice came out at a squeak, and he quickly cleared his throat. "That is to say I never noticed that before." Buffy grinned. "That's good to know." Giles cleared his throat, muttering something about young people and their hormones, before saying. "Dr. Reid, you said you can read Latin?" “Oh,” He said, tearing his eyes away from the pretty girl who had captured his attention so thoroughly. “Um… Yes, yes I can.” “If you would be so kind…” Giles asked. “Yes, of course.” He stumbled as he took his first step, feeling a strong grip on his elbow before he could fall completely. He looked down into the sparkling green eyes of his savior as she held him up, feeling his face heat up in mortification. She managed to ease his embarrassment though, with a kind smile. “It’s over here.” She said, guiding Spencer to where she had been standing before. Buffy turned the flashlight back on and pointed it toward the sigil first. Spencer felt his vision tilt and narrow when he saw it, his breath evacuating his lungs in disbelief. He was pretty sure had Buffy not still been holding on he would have collapsed. It wasn’t that he hadn’t believed them; it was that he convinced himself he only wanted to believe them, and now with the Egyptian symbol for Isis staring him in the face, he had no choice but to believe. He shook his head and looked at the girl with wide disbelieving eyes. “Impossible.” He whispered. “What is it?” Giles immediately jumped in. Spencer cleared his throat. “It’s the Ancient Egyptian symbol for the goddess Isis.” “Dear Lord.” Giles breathed. “Buffy why on earth didn’t you tell me the sigil over that temple was Egyptian.” Buffy pursed her lips in anger at his words. “Excuse me! I was just a little too busy to notice, Giles.” “Bloody hell, Buffy!” He exclaimed “Do you have any idea…” “Hey,” She interrupted, making Spencer take a step back as he watched her fury build. “I had just spent the last six months training a bunch of teenage girls, while simultaneously trying to make sure they didn’t get themselves dead. Not to mention getting thrown out of my own house, by whom… Oh yah, I forgot…you! And let’s not forget the massiveness that was the battle with the First fucking Evil looming over all our heads. So just excuse the hell out of me for not recognizing every Egyptian goddamn symbol I see.” Spencer kept quiet at the exchange. Not really knowing what to think of what he just overheard. It was clear however that Giles was quite used to this type of outburst if his next words were any indication. “Are you quite finished?” Giles said calmly. “Buffy I do actually realize the magnitude of the stress you were under.” He paused. “I was there too, remember? We were all under an enormous amount of stress. However, had I known the Guardians were worshipers of Isis?” She could literally hear him cleaning his glasses. “My God Buffy, the Guardians told you they used the essence of the Slayer to create the Scythe, and they worshiped Isis. What if, what if the Slayers origins lie with her?” It was Buffy’s turn to feel woozy and she reached out and grabbed a hold of Spencer without thinking. “You…you mean the Shadow Men invoked a goddess, not…not a demon?” Her words came out croaked and hallow. “Precisely,” Giles agreed. “It all makes perfect sense. Daemon is the Latin word for the Ancient Greek daimon, meaning god, god like, power, and fate. They were supposed to be benevolent deities, who watched over and guarded mortal men.” Spencer couldn’t help himself, he cut in. “Isis was known as the Goddess of protection, and though she stayed in the background most of the time, she was also thought to be more powerful than her husband Osiris or even Ra.” “Osiris.” Buffy whispered, the color draining from her face. “Good Lord!” Giles breathed, not putting two and two together until just then. “Did I…Did I say something wrong?” Spencer asked, worry now coloring his voice. “No.” Giles said in a defeated voice. “We just have… Well…some experience with that particular deity.” “I died.” Buffy blurted, stepping away from him and wrapping her arms around herself. “I was dead, and my friends invoked Osiris to bring me back.” “I’m not sure I understand your definition of dead.” Spencer said, still trying to hold on to that little bit of the scientific world he wanted so badly to cling too. “Try one hundred and forty-seven days.” Buffy sniped, “I was rotting in the ground, six feet under.” His eyes widened, but he didn’t say what she expected. “That’s what you meant by having to dig yourself out…You were serious? I thought it was a euphemism or perhaps a horribly traumatic encounter with a serial killer.” Giles interrupted, “Dr. Reid, I know the idea of this must be hard for you, but you must understand that this is the same world you’ve always lived in. However, there are things, very dark things that exist in it.” “Mr. Giles, Sir,” Spencer said in a passive aggressive manner that surprised and impressed both Buffy and Giles. “Please do not patronize me. I may be young Sir, but I am not oblivious to the terrors the world has to offer.” He paused for breath. “I just graduated from my training at Quantico, Sir. My whole field of study was Behavioral Analysis, so I am quite aware how horrible the world can get.” His small tangent had Buffy’s eyes widening, but Giles next words had her leaning against the bookcase for support. “You’re FBI.” Giles stated. “I haven’t been assigned yet, but yes.” Spencer confirmed. “Is Jason Gideon still head of that department?” Giles asked. Spencer froze, “You…you know Special Agent Gideon?” “We’ve met a few times.” Giles confirmed. “There are times in your line of work Dr. Reid, where our worlds collide. It wouldn’t do to send a team of agents into a situation they cannot handle.” He paused. “Agent Gideon has been somewhat of a mediator between the Watchers Council and the FBI, he makes sure you don’t pick up a case that will get you all killed.” “Okay, could someone please explain to me what the hell is going on?” Buffy cut in. "The work that Dr. Reid will one day be doing Buffy, is profiling violent criminals." Giles explained, “In that line of work they are more than likely to get called out on a case at some point where the supernatural plays a role. It's Agent Gideon’s job to make sure those cases don’t cross his desk." Buffy gasped, "Giles, how long has this been going on?" Giles cleared his throat. “Well we’ve been involved to some capacity with the authorities since 1973. It was actually Nikki Wood who first brought to our attention the need to have someone on the inside.” “Nikki Wood?” Reid frowned in confusion. “I remember hearing about that case. She was accused of killing her lover, Li Howard. Agent Gideon was called in to profile her, but quickly realized she wasn’t the UN-SUB. They actually never caught the guy.” “Trust me my boy; he was caught, just not by the usual means.” Giles said. Buffy frowned. “Vamp?” “Unfortunately, yes.” Giles confirmed. Spencer looked to Buffy then, deciding once he was done here, him and Senior Supervisory Special Agent Gideon were going to have a very long conversation. “Maybe you should show me that inscription now.” Buffy nodded, feeling her stomach drop. Well, there went any chance of him ever wanting to see her again. She sighed, cursing the freakishness that was her life. “Sure, it’s umm…its right over here.” She pointed the flashlight in the direction, closing her eyes as she felt him lean in closer to get a better look. He was so warm, that was the first thing she noticed, and he smelled good, like old books and aftershave. She found herself wanting to bury her nose in his sweater, and had to shake her head to get the visual out of her mind. Dear god, what on earth was this man doing to her. Spencer wasn’t fairing much better in that department. It took him three times to even read the inscription before it made any sense. He felt like his senses had been charged with electricity, the smell of her strawberry shampoo filling his nose and making his head spin. He quickly shook his head coming back to himself. “Non enim te solum, quia illam. Quod sanguis ejus aperire, quem ipse sibi elegit.” Spencer whispered. “And the English version?” Buffy asked. “It is not for thee, only for She. The blood of the Chosen shall open it.” Giles translated. “Great,” She muttered. “Blood magic.” “I do believe in this case Buffy, blood magic was a necessity.” Giles said. “It insured that the only person able to access whatever is hidden would be you.” “Yeah.” She sighed. “I know.” She turned and looked to Spencer, pulling out the dagger she kept tucked between her jeans and the small of her back. His eyes widened when he saw it, and took a step back. “Do you think the blood should go on the sigil or inscription?” She asked, wincing as she sliced her palm open. “The sigil.” Came both Giles and Spencer’s voice. “The sigil it is.” She said, reaching out her bloodied hand. Something happened then. Something Spencer couldn’t have stopped if he tried. He felt frightened for her, and maybe even more frightened for himself. He reached out to stop her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder just as her hand made contact with the carving. Suddenly, everything seemed to go black and the world began to spin. He felt like he was free falling without a parachute, and then she was there gripping his hand tight enough to make him wince in pain. When the world righted itself again they stood in what must be some sort of temple. A woman with skin the color of bronze, hair as black as night, and clothed form head to toe in gold and jewels stared back at them. She smiled lovingly at Buffy. “My daughter of night, you have finally come.”

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