#it’s genuinely so disrespectful to the cast producers and everyone who would LOVE to be on big brother

[mazojo]

Need the next HoH to be a who can self evict the fastest competition

[cheerfullycatholic]

My thoughts on The Last of Us show

Fair warning, it's a long one

I've been a huge fan of tlou since the game first came out, and ever since then Ellie has been my #1 favorite character. But being a bookworm I've learned over the years to be wary of show and movie adaptations, because they always lack what makes the book, or in this case, the game, good. I didn't have a lot of hope for the show, but I was pleasantly surprised by the first episode. And every episode after that made me more and more disappointed and uninterested, except for the last one. Normally I wouldn't go to such lengths to explain why I didn't like a show, but because the game is so close to my heart I just can't not say anything. And I wanted to preface this by saying that I don't think the show is bad per se, if there wasn't original work to compare it to it would be amazing (my sister, who knows nothing of the game, loves it), and I'm not writing this out of disrespect (mostly). But since this is the internet you'll probably take it however you want anyway. So I guess we'll start with something that I know will piss people off a lot; the casting.

There are two things I care about when it comes to who is cast to play preexisting characters, in this order; 1. If the person cast is able to play the character well, and 2. If they look like the character. You know where this is going. I don't think Pedro Pascal was a great fit for Joel. Was he good at playing him? He was, about half the time. I'm not too mad at his portrayal, but I think it's obvious by now that he's the new shiny famous actor everyone loves and everyone wants to see. Because everyone's obsessed with him, no matter what, his fans will watch whatever he's in. He can bring in a lot of money for the directors and producers. I can't help but feel he was cast just for that, and not because they couldn't find anyone better to play Joel (acting wise and look wise), and that is what bugs me the most. In the game, Joel doesn't seem so haunted by his past, or he at least hides it more. He has a deeper personality, he has lighthearted back and forth conversations with Tess, and he never treated Ellie like a monster. He also wasn't as scared as show Joel was, clickers were more of an annoyance than anything, especially at first. There was no hands shaking, eyes full of fear, "from this point on we are silent. Not quiet, silent". Game Joel acted like he spent the last twenty years dealing with infected, because he has. Show Joel didn't give off that vibe. However, show Joel dealing with the raiders was better, that's where I really saw Pedro Pascal portray him well. Overall, Pedro Pascal did a good job, I just wasn't as big a fan as I wanted to be.

A casting I actually was a huge fan of, was Sarah's. Like I said previously, I care about an actor's ability to play a character accurately much more than looking like that character. I saw some people online say they were unhappy with the casting because Nico Parker looks nothing like her, but she played her so well. I watched the first episode three times, and every time the thought that kept popping up in my head was "wow, she is Sarah, she did a fantastic job". I'm very happy with how show Sarah turned out.

Bella Ramsey's portrayal was probably the worst, in my opinion. When I first heard that she had been cast, I was excited. I watched her in Game of Thrones, she looks like Ellie and I thought she'd do well at playing her, too. In some parts she did, but not in the parts that were the most important. She was great at playing the defensive, angry, loud Ellie who's fighting raiders and protecting the people she cares about. But that's a small fraction of Ellie. While I was watching the show, I was also watching a playthrough of the game. More than not, Ellie is kind, generous, sweet, and genuine. She's more open about caring for people, more calculated, and much less sarcastic, and when she is sarcastic, it's usually lighthearted. Show Ellie was so angry and explosive. A scene where that really stuck out to me was when Ellie was trying to patch up Joel after he got wounded by the hunter at the college. Show Ellie showed her fear through anger, while game Ellie just showed her fear (which is, like I said, more genuine). And where game Ellie was genuine and open with her feelings, show Ellie seemed much more awkward with expressing her thoughts and feelings. That's where I think Bella Ramsey did the worst job. I don't know if she really knows how to play someone like Ellie. She was fantastic as Lyanna Mormont, who is very strong, mean, and tough in all the best ways. She gave off strong modern feminist "I don't take shit from anyone" vibes, but that's not really Ellie. She's not mean. She also, and this is a big part of Ellie's character, isn't disrespectful towards Joel. In the game, Ellie listened to Joel and respected his decision when he said no guns. In the show, as soon as she got the opportunity, she went behind his back and took a gun from Bill's stash. I won't analyze and tear apart every single thing that went wrong with show Ellie. I think you get my point. She was much too different from game Ellie, I rarely considered them the same person.

Anyway, more on characters later. Right now I want to talk about the differences in the episodes. And before I start, yes, I know the show was going to be different in certain ways from the game. I understand and accept that. That doesn't mean I have to like some of those changes.

In episode one there were a few differences, for instance the plane crashing instead of the car. But pretty much all of the differences I loved. I have no complaints about the first episode, but I wanted to make it known that I enjoyed it and the changes. I'm glad we got to see more Sarah, and more about how the infection started and spread. The first episode was the only time where I felt scared while watching this show.

Episode two was where things started to go downhill. With Joel and Tess's kind of awkward feeling relationship (didn't like how she low-key talked to him like he was a child when she said she wanted him to hurt Robert). That's another thing, I didn't like that we didn't get the scene where Tess killed Robert. I understand that they probably had to cut it out to save time, but she's in the game for such a short time and her "if you hadn't tried to fucking kill me" line was her best. Kinda felt like they disrespected her character by reducing her to this mean, anxious scaredy cat who, like Joel, acted like clickers were more than an annoyance like her game character did. Game Tess was awesome, and show Tess fell short. However, I preferred how she died in the show. Blowing herself up with a building full of infected was much more meaningful than just shooting two guys.

Speaking of suicide. Episode three. My least favorite episode, and the most disrespectful the writers were to the original characters. Nick Offerman was a perfect cast for Bill. But the show tore his character apart. Like Bill said in the show, he's a survivalist. I've met survivalists, they are the most arrogant group I know, and that's a compliment. They are hellbent on kicking the apocalypse in the ass and surviving until the bitter end. They don't commit suicide. Growing old in an apocalypse is the biggest accomplishment to these people. They're strong and they're not quitters. Taking away that essential part of Bill's character was the biggest mistake the show made. And they did the same to Frank. We don't know a lot about game Frank, but he sure has hell didn't give up as easily as show Frank did. In the game, Frank hated Bill and wanted to leave, but on his way out of the town, he got bit, and decided he didn't want to turn, so he hung himself. Suicide isn't cute or sweet or peaceful, ask anyone who tried to overdose, and no matter what anyone tries to tell you, suicide is sad, and a bad choice to make. I don't care that they made the whole episode a pro gay love story (didn't like it but don't care when compared to the rest), I don't care that they rewrote Frank to not hate Bill, I do care that not long after Canada decided to start killing off their unwanted citizens, this show tried to spin suicide into a peaceful out to chronic illness or an unhappy life. This episode was trash, and sent all of the wrong messages. The writers ruined an amazing character, and I will not forgive them for it. And what disappoints me the most is that Neil Druckmann worked on the show. I'm a writer, I understand wanting to change characters and storylines drastically after ten years. But I draw the line at changing already published and established stories, especially when it's so painfully obvious that it's politically motivated. I don't care what anyone says, it's wrong to take a character that people have loved for years and make them different for no good reason.

Woohoo, episode three rant over. I could say more, but I don't think I need to.

I didn't have too many complaints about the entire story with Henry, Sam, and the resistance group, which happened in episode four and five. There are many differences between the game and the show, but I didn't mind the changes. In fact, I loved the scene when all of the infected started coming out of the sinkhole and the bloater ripped off Perry's head. That was awesome. Actually, one of Bella Ramsey's best performances as Ellie was when Henry killed himself after Sam turned. Her cry of anguish felt so genuine. It was one of those few moments where I thought, "there she is, there's the Ellie I know".

Episode six was eh. I didn't like that they went straight to Jackson and never went to the dam. It felt cheap, especially when Dina's character popped in for a second. I love Dina but damn, that scene was bad. Maria's character was also disappointing. She was so on guard and untrusting of Joel and Ellie, acted more like a cop than anything. In the game she actually formed a bit of a relationship with Ellie immediately. And the thing with Tommy kind of treating Joel like a bad guy. Game Tommy took full responsibility for the stuff they did in the past, he regretted it but he didn't act afraid of it, or of his brother. In the game he was glad to see Joel, in the show it felt like Joel and Ellie were imposing. I also disliked that the entire scene of Ellie running away and Joel and Tommy going out to find her was cut out. And their fight about Joel leaving was lacking emotion because in the past episodes they didn't really build up a relationship to make it emotional. They still acted like they hardly knew each other at that point. Anyway, something I did like was the Shimmer appearance. That felt more organic than Dina's. But the whole scene at the college was lame. Watching Joel fall on top of a piece of rebar broke my freaking heart in the game and dammit! I wanted to see it again. I wanted to see more fighting in general. The college scene in the game is so intense and cool, and it was cut down to the end of the episode and a hunter stabbing him with a broken baseball bat. Again I know they were probably short on time and money and obviously couldn't add all of the scenes in the show, but this was an important scene and it felt rushed.

Episode seven was something to be desired. I didn't like how they wrote Riley's and Ellie's friendship to be so awkward. They're supposedly best friends, and the show made it seem like they weren't as close as they were in the game. And to talk a little bit more about show Ellie's character, game Ellie was upset that Riley was leaving, but she still more or less supported her right away. Show Ellie was much too explosive, yelling and storming out like she did. But other than that, the rest of it was alright.

Very much disliked episode eight. I think it was Bella Ramsey's worst episode, which was especially obvious with her first encounter with David and James. They also cut out the entire scene where Ellie and David had to kill a bunch of infected. That whole scenario led to Ellie putting down her guard slightly and I was disappointed to not see it. I didn't like how the show emphasized the group being religious. There are a few things here and there that show they are in the game, but obviously, being a cannibal pedophile should take priority when showing how a person or group of people are villains. In the show, David being a cannibal pedophile felt secondary to him being the leader of a religious cult. Then towards the end it felt like they made it too obvious that David was a pedo. I like the game because they told you exactly who he was in a subtle way. The audience isn't dumb, we don't need it written out in bold words for us. I also thought that it was a well accepted thing in the game that the entire group was okay with eating people, but I don't necessarily care that that was changed. Something good that the episode did were the scenes when Ellie was David's prisoner. She was still too angry and explosive, but the "broke your fucking finger" line was great, as was the scene when they had her on the table to be chopped up. The ending was okay, but I preferred the game version where Ellie was so distraught that Joel had to pull her off of David's body after she killed him. It was also the first time they actually seemed to have the relationship they did in the game.

The last episode felt rushed, but it was nice to see them with something that resembled their relationship in the game, although they were both still awkward and didn't seem very comfortable with each other. I loved how they made the scene where Joel killed all the fireflies look sad. The last episode was one of the best, only second to the first. I didn't care for the change with how the fireflies found them, but I don't hate it. I understand it was, again, probably a time and budget thing. They had the giraffes! That's what matters.

Really, it's not a "bad" show. Visually it was stunning the majority of the time (the fake horse was more funny than cringy). But where they differed from the game and some of their casting choices is where they went wrong, at least for me. One of the things I looked forward to most was seeing the infected. The show did such a beautiful job with them, but we hardly ever got to see them. I wanted so much to see the scene when Joel gets stuck in one of Bill's traps and has to shoot infected upside down. But they traded that for bullshit. Made me sad. I did like that they changed the reason Joel and Tess decided to agree to smuggling Ellie out of Boston. In the game they just wanted the guns Robert stole from them, while in the show Joel wanted to find Tommy. I didn't mind that change at all. I also loved Marlene. I have nothing bad or even slightly negative to say about her. She's amazing.

Overall, to me, the show in some scenes felt more like a retelling than a remake. Or like it was based off of a fanfiction that someone who played the game a few years ago wrote from memory. If not compared to the source material, it's great. But it has source material, and at times it felt like that source material was not respected. It's a shame, because it's a beautiful game with a beautiful story and beautiful characters. The people who only watch the show won't know who Joel and Ellie really are. If they make a second season, I have no plans to watch it.

[captainkurosolaire]

~ Mass Update ~

Mainly going into future plans and intents alongside ideas below cut.

Ton's of things I've in store this will prove difficult to vent it all out. But here we go... First off rehashing and appropriately learning to tag and organize things better on my blog. Each category will have their own corresponding content, I seek to bring or share. [Tales of Goldbrand] -- I intend this to carry a Compendium of all my writes soon that'll have everything neatly in-order including a glossary, so it'll have highlights of stories that even matter or the best stuff. I've written here for a very, long time, there's been many shifts. I want to make it more accessible. While coloring what matters for people who want to learn Captain or his Crew with less chapters. While also giving choice to find it all easily. This is essentially a step-above master-lists. I'll be doing that after the Saga I have going on, right now is done. [Captain] -- Will provide you strictly with Captain screenshots, gifs, photo-sets. This is still his blog despite the Crew thing's will sort of make this a scuffed Multi-Muse blog. I've few more things to edit and tag fix to get all his stuff though. [The Wild Crew] -- Afterwards this story is done Immortal Age Saga, It's something that I mainly wrote as a passion project within three days to get my warm-up process fixed. It's to allow me to get a feel for all his Crewmates and casts, in combat, in-general, to feel their presences. While also giving a bit of their backstories. At any point, I can go back and polish or tweak things in. They're NPC's but... not entirely. All will have their own 'Dreams' and their own 'Disapproval's' they have their own missions even. These things will factor eventually, they might set seeds, to betray or disagree with something, but that's all angst and more stories to be created, but overall, they'll probably always be Crew, eventually. -- I plan on making character-profile sheets of them and putting them in this Tab, it'll have their screenshots, their likes/dislikes. Some RP partners or people can also be shipped with them, but they'll all be monogamous and originally start off probably Pan. This allows them to figure out what they like on their own stories. I've always been someone who likes organic-flow. Although this one story contain all 16 characters or more, the rest will probably be shortened to a Squad of 4 and dispersed when on adventuring missions. Until I do a War Arc, that's my main goal to build too. [Roster] -- Will contain this Crew in just screen-sets dedicated to them, I'll probably randomly produce those. I've PC players among this Crew too. I may not be done either adding more, but this Crew is mainly built around Quality. Most pirate crew's mainly, have hundreds, thousands. Even Fleets. This Crew has personalities, monsters, people who are living life's that exist with piracy. He's an particular leader that had PC players the same way, he's had split-personality serial killers aboard, tribal chieftains, succubus, all sorts of various people once on a Crew. It's often an outcast style, pirates default are chaotic in nature, so this really isn't any different, it's a Fantasy version of it. There's humanization characters aboard too though, so this cast is really decked, everything and person is vital, they matter because they remind or covet something that others can draw upon. If ever played (Three Houses or Mass Effect / Dragon Age Origins) A lot of things like that are relatable too this structure and format. Which, Is something I want to be able to give when RPing. I want a genuine feel of this new world someone else's muse will be the main-character too. Depending on what's interacting everything they'll be scale appropriately to follow the genre they're in and environment even. [Aesthetics] -- Already explainable what you'll find here. [Asks] -- Same thing. [Prompts] -- Trivial things I was tagged too, I plan on compiling later. [Writing] -- Another alternatively to randomly go-down and it works right now. [Logs] -- Will have more individualistic master-lists and posts there, my poems from Sheik Sphere the Bard, etc.

Things of that nature, I'll probably add still. It's where a lot of my creative writing is summed. [Gems of Hydaelyn] -- My main #tag for other characters and artists, creationist. Lot of amazing people easily to find their zones or follow them optionally if you like. Ton's I intend to support and bolster, be a lot less unspoken. I'm never the type who's been strictly inclusive. But I'll do that when I've time to even explore the dash, I'm always still planning ahead with things and projects. [CKS] My original character-sheet it's outdated on something's but not too terrible. I'll give him polishing someday, I swear? [21+F-List] -- Just purely degenerate stuff of Captain. I'm a pirate blog. I will represent that with openness and furthermore. I'm never projecting you some false-image. I started off a smut-writer by stripping that, I no-longer represent the same aura and identity. But those are strictly his stuff and kinks, I'm effective in executing them but they're not all relatable to me OOC. This blog will always be 18+ containing crude or dark material sometimes, romantic things, this Captain is blunt, will literally put his cock on the table in conversations. Swearing and being censored would be too uncommon and displace most of him, but there's more about him then all this. [Other] -- I pay homage to a lot of characters, I originally am a Concept Designer. Which mean's I make characters and ideas like my addiction. Bad characters / villains or other little things I like to share in designs, I'll put there. Some villains might get little photo-sets, even if they died. Just cause I like their design, or maybe I'll give them an AU, where they won. When I've wrapped up things. [Collabs + Ships] -- Is a new project idea. This isn't going to be something limited too romantic only ships. It'll contain, platonic, romantic, friendships, rivals, frenemies, family, PC Crew, all ships. I am desperately working on improving my gif, screenshot, posing game so I can supply 'Screen Stories' this is not only a way to RP that's accessible with even people who are upon time-crunches from work, It gives visual-representation. To impactful stories shared with others and establish bonds. That are all-valid and impactful matter. Lot of people take a lot of their characters attributes into them and are them dialed up, I work with that and bit more, differently. I'm disconnected from my characters and they'll get hurt and injured and killed by me, that's my duty as their Author to give them conflicts and struggles. I'm their major antagonist, but that doesn't mean at-all, it's always SET that way. The characters I like to make have their own life, they live in this setting and are abide by it, they're often nothing, nobodies, and by the interacting with others, they slowly gradually building, more... Through emotional impacts, they alter, these are REAL people by all their beliefs. Each person they come in-contact with are legitimate and treated like that too. They've always impacted or given them insights to grow, or represent more. Otherwise it'd be criminally disrespectful if I allowed any emotional I felt OOC be the grudge to something IC. Captain in-particular is set on defying me. I cannot have that. ...But I can't stop him. He's met and encountered so many people and lived so many scenarios based on the actions of others, he's giving a chance right now to actually do things a lot further than impossible. The more people he meets and encounters, experiences, the more I lose. These stories are emotionally interactive where everything is a factor and adds to the dice, where the other people are the one who get to roll the dice for him, not me. That's something I want to color in. People range in emotions, they have their down's, ups, their own wholesome-grounding people, spending time with your favorite people, there's nothing more cherishing than that, being in your own comfort-zone or 'safe-space' these are all treasures that we live under, today. Contrary if what people assume of me, I'm not another 'blogger' that's came

before, who's wanting to force a harem, then constantly is bewildered when that falls to pieces cause of selfishness or a lack of communication, or the skeletons they have in their closets and beliefs they hid behind and swindled fooled everyone. I'm not looking to be popular or anything really, I just create stories and want to share in those, and I want to also boost others included, upward with me, especially those who make me. There's no ego in anything I do, this is purely love. I've never cared about being replicated or duplicated, I've had stalkers, I've gone through more then anyone would imagine, I've been used OOC and abused, just for my writing and cold-harshly told, i'd never amount to anything other then that or vice-versa. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Passion. That's all I got and am anymore. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Passion is the hardest thing to keep. It's something that can be stolen, quite effortlessly. Few words of discouragement, a bad negative representation, a lack of confidence, or small amount of time, there's many thing's that can put that flame out. Once you lose it. The difficulty to reattain is hundred-times harder than climbing any mountain for real. I've watched the greatest creators crumble from under the pressure, from beaten down by others. I watched many of them do it to themselves because they put a grand vision of needing validation of another and once lost, felt uncompelling to press onward. But passion also can be given BACK and drawn. It can be shown and encourage others, with a soft-triggering, that pushes them. That motivates, that constantly sticks to it. There are many that fuel me. If I ever quit, I let them down, I spit in the faces of people who're better than me in every-way. Or people who've came and given me their precious Time. That have given their character's or dedication to the abundant stories and community-driven things I've done. There's ONLY things you can do, create, give and provide. It cannot ever come to life without YOU. This is a fact. ...I swear, If you let your creativity soar, you'll be amazed by the heights you get. Constantly polish and learn and hone the best you, challenge yourself day after painstaking day, to draw better improvement on something, no matter how trivial or unfamiliar you are. You'll find a confidence only you can give yourself. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Future Plans --------------------------------------------------------------------- For me, I've got so much more stories to give and also explore, I might be taking up soon some other artists and more skilled people from community and hire them for some of my future writes, to up my game or cause something thing's can't be done in-game cause no background carries it. I also got a lot of-set up things and more angst stuff I want to practice, plus I'm adamantly on that grind to produce screen-sets with the intent's to some sort of improving daily. Additionally more people I'll be reaching out too soon for these collab's ideas and things. I look forward to shaking your hands, giving some hugs, show you my respect and admiration, then creating some enchanting stories and giving plots light. Feel free to reach out to me, I get scattered-brain but I'm working on getting better about it. Eventually will get to you though, my goals, if uninterested just say so when I poke, no bites, unless you kinky. Anyways, cheers hearties.

[rocorambles]

Finding Home

Pairing: Terushima x Reader

Prompt: Mythology

Genre: SFW, Fluff, Slight Angst, Greek Mythology AU, Dionysus!Terushima, Human!Reader

Summary: Terushima has never liked winter, the land too barren to produce his prized grapes, the weather too harsh for the merrymaking he’s known for. But maybe, just maybe, a certain mortal can help change his perspective.   

Author’s Note: This is my contribution for my HQ Discord Server’s SFW collaboration. There are so many talented writers on the server and I highly encourage you to check out the collaboration masterlist here to see how everyone decided to run with this prompt. (Masterlist goes live Friday, March 12th!) 

Terushima has never really belonged here and even after centuries and lifetimes, he doesn’t feel any more a part of Olympus than when he first joined the ranks of the gods and goddesses above as Dionysus, protector of misfits. 

He scoffs at the title. How fitting when he himself is a misfit among the beings of Olympus, the son of a mortal mother, a “human-lover” (a title he’s actually quite fond of despite the disdain and judgement tainting it when spoken by those around him). Ironic when he dares say most of his fellow divine beings have had more than their fair shares of “loving humans”. It’s how he was created himself after all and he scowls at the thought of the handsome brunette who he unfortunately is forced to call father. 

One would think that with all the affairs Zeus, or Shittykawa as he prefers to refer to him as, nickname courtesy of Poseidon, is off and about having, the king of the gods wouldn’t be so stringent and watchful over his kingdom above. But as free with his affection as he is, Oikawa is a stickler for tradition and Terushima sighs as he enters the gates of Olympus, plastering his trademark cocky grin on his face as he greets his family. 

It’s ironic really how Oikawa insists on these family reunions considering how they hardly really consider each other family. But no one dares to disobey and they all force themselves through the polite small talk, extravagant meals, and elegant parties, everything so detailed and beautiful yet cold, much like their organizer, and Terushima skin practically crawls at how different this is from his much more impassioned festivities, never used to how restrained the manners of Olympus are despite how many of these he has attended. 

But it’s not all so terrible and this time he doesn’t fake his wide toothy grin when two beings burst into his quarters late at night. 

He’s not foolish enough to believe Apollo and Ares are the strapping gods they’re portrayed to be, knowing too well just how monstrous and terrifying the two can be, knowing the atrocious acts they’ve committed. But as brothers? As fellow gods? They make Olympus bearable and that’s more than can be said for anyone else. So he sets aside their differences temporarily, humming along to the sound of Apollo’s music, laughingly joking that his talent for songs is the only reason women and goddesses look past the rooster-like mess on top of his head. He drinks goblet after goblet of mead with Ares in an attempt to see who can outdrink the other this time around, not stopping until his vision is so blurred that he can hardly tell if it really is Ares in front of him or a large owl with vaguely human features. 

But as soon as sunlight begins filtering in marking a new day and the end of his forced return, he’s quick to bid farewell, nose diving back down to Earth and immediately feeling more at peace as he lands in a flourishing rice field, slowly making his way to the quaint home just ahead. 

It’s an admittedly strange camaraderie, the friendship between the God of Chaos and a demi-god son of Demeter, but Terushima’s heart swells with fondness when he sees Kita sifting through the grains of his latest harvest, chuckling at the slightly quirked lips on the other’s usually impassive face when he sees the blonde making his way towards him. 

He knows the other Olympus immortals find it strange how he prefers to spend most of his time on Earth, whispering and spreading rumors about the strange god who so easily casts aside the splendor of Olympus for the humble life and home of a farmer, who prefers to idle his days away with humans and a demi-god rather than his own much more powerful and esteemed family up above. And he knows even Kita has his doubts and disagreements with the wild debauchery and havoc he wreaks upon the mortal world, preferring his mother’s more wholesome ways of providing and caring for humans. 

But both of them are tied by their kindness and benevolence towards mankind, frowning upon the hostility, cruelty, and selfishness the other gods and goddesses subject humans to. And Kita never says a word against Terushima, knowing that even if they aren’t methods he understands or condones, Terushima’s rituals and revelries bring joy, provide an escape, take away the suffering of mortals, even if only temporarily.    

Besides, the demi-god is far too busy with helping Demeter prepare for the harvest to really pay much mind to Terushima’s antics, flitting here and there as he helps ensure the earth is fertile, making sure grains and seeds are plentiful, working seamlessly alongside Terushima as the god of wine cheerfully goes about making sure there’s more than an adequate amount of ripe grapes and fruits for wine making and merriment. 

As far as Terushima is concerned, Olympus can keep its cold splendor. Here is where he was meant to be, thriving in the heat and brilliant light of the sun, sighing in content as he pops grape after grape in his mouth, the sweet juices coating his mouth as he watches the humans in amusement as they excitedly crush the small fruits, making the beverage he had shown their ancestors long ago how to create.

And then the harvest is officially upon them and Terushima joyfully cheers as his followers indulge in the delicious nectar of their hard work, wine sloshing from cups as music blares, the earth resounding with raucous ecstatic celebrations and the stomping of feet as mankind wildly dances and jumps around. 

It’s a wild frenzy and Kita slightly winces at the chaos that has overtaken the world, but it’s hard not to look on in affection and amusement as the humans and his dear friend enjoy themselves, finding temporary freedom and escape from the restraints of society. So he lets them be, spending time with his mother as she also enjoys the festivities of her followers (albeit much more demure), glad to see both Terushima and her in high spirits, knowing the hardest part of the year for both of them is just around the corner. 

A practical person might scoff at Demeter’s extreme reaction every time Hades comes to retrieve her daughter, but there’s nothing rational about a mother’s love and the world turns dead and cold as the goddess grieves and mourns the loss of her daughter, even though she knows it’s only temporary. 

Terushima sighs at the cold white snow and ice that blankets the barren grounds, feeling his own vitality drain from him when the majority of the revelries come to an end as the humans prepare for the harsh winter months ahead. He hates the mortal world when it’s like this, finding the cold quiet far too similar to Olympus and he sulks, retreating and staying put inside his shared abode with Kita, impatiently waiting for Persephone to return to her mother so that the world can defrost and resume. 

Kita is patient at first, alternating between checking in on his mother and Terushima, ensuring both great gods of the Earth are alive and well. Although “well” is a relative term and the demi-god sighs at how both their depression and grief permeate throughout the world, adding an icier edge to the already brutal atmosphere. However even his patience has a limit and though he doesn’t dare disrespect his mother, he shoves at least the god of the vine out the door, shooing him towards the nearest town and telling him not to return until he’s in a better mood. 

The blonde listens, albeit reluctantly and with a few muttered grumblings, but it’s a nice distraction, wandering around and masquerading as a human. And although he’s not in the mood to join in, he appreciates how advanced civilizations and technology have become, allowing those brave enough to face the harsh frigid weather to frolic at bars, even if it means being bundled in layers and layers of winter clothing. It isn’t anything near as rambunctious and lively as the harvest season, but he feels his mood lighten as the streets are roused by drunken and rowdy crowds, laughter and cheer filling the cold air. 

Feeling more himself after a few hours of amusedly observing from afar, a steaming mug of mulled wine in his hands, he begins to turn around and make his way back home only to be interrupted as someone crashes into him and instincts have him catching you as you tipsily stumble and giggle in his arms. He can smell the sweet scent of wine rolling off of you in waves and he fights back the urge to laugh as you sloppily smile, clinging onto him for dear life as you try and steady yourself on wobbly legs while you simultaneously thank your hero for saving you. 

Humans really are the most adorable things sometimes.

He’s a bit apprehensive about just leaving you when you’re in such a state, but he relaxes when your friends rush to your aid, profusely apologizing to him as he carefully hands you over to them and he just waves them off, telling them to have fun as he makes to walk away again. But he’s stopped by your hands still holding tight to him. 

“Come party with us!” 

This time he does laugh as one of your friends angrily admonishes you for your behavior and he gently tries to loosen your grip on him, telling you empty promises of “maybe next time”. But he freezes when one of your hands he’s managed to unhook from him softly rests on his cheek and he chokes at the genuine concern in your eyes despite the drunken haze in them. 

“You look so sad...Please stay? Maybe it’ll make you feel better.” 

The words are childish and slurred, yet Terushima is moved by the pure intentions he can sense in the syllables, drawn in by the heart and love he can feel pouring from you. All his life he has cared for others, cared for the world. But when was the last time someone had cared for him? When was the last time he had allowed someone to care for him? 

So in a moment of weakness he allows himself to let go of his responsibilities, his duties, his own walls and rules he had created to maintain a distance from the mortals he oversees in an effort to avoid dragging them into the messes caused by diving beings, to make sure no one else is subjected to what his own mortal mother suffered through because of Oikawa’s selfish desires. 

It’s ironic how little a god known as the liberator allows himself to be free, usually preferring to watch from afar and not partake in the frenzied chaos of his followers. But tonight he joins in, entangling himself among the throngs of bodies moving to the vibrating pulses of echoing music and beats, submitting to the wild energy around him, pretending just for a moment that he’s finally found where he belongs. 

You make it easy for him to believe he’s found a new home, a place he’s accepted, and even amidst the blinding lights and smoky haze, you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever met, your liveliness, energy, and humanity far outshining any of the gods or goddesses he knows. There’s nothing reserved or distant about you, no feeling of someone keeping up pretences or a front. You’re just...you and he knows even without the help of liquid courage you’ve generously doused yourself with tonight, that you wouldn’t be all that different. 

Maybe a little less handsy and definitely quieter (he subtly winces when you practically shout in his ear asking if he wants another drink). But the genuine warmth and kindness he can feel radiating from you? Your easy and uninhibited acceptance of him? That’s just who you are and he allows himself to find temporary comfort in this new sense of belonging you make him feel.  

Despite how he’s sworn to never rope a human into the twisted world of immortals, for the first time in his life, he feels the temptation to break the promise he had made to himself all those centuries ago. 

But it’s a pipe dream and as dawn’s light begins to peek through the night sky and clubs and bars close shop, reality comes crashing down on him. He remains steadfast in his beliefs, promising himself that he’ll leave and forget all about you as soon as he’s made sure you’re safely tucked in bed despite the desperate pleas and cries of his heart. And he grits his teeth as he fights to ignore his desires. 

He’s stronger than this. He’s better than this. Above the immoral lust his family is infamous for. Above the preying ways of Oikawa. 

Or so he’d like to believe. 

But he can’t help himself from sitting at your bedside, gazing down at your peaceful face, finding comfort in your deep even breaths as sleep overcomes you, telling himself that he’ll be just another minute, over and over again, until he’s forced to his feet hours later as you begin to rise. And as he makes his escape before you can awaken and see him, he knows that he’ll never be able to fully forget you.

Sometimes Kita is far too observant for his own good and Terushima groans when he’s immediately pinned down by curious knowing eyes as soon as he walks through the front doors. But he’s never been good at keeping his thoughts to himself and he rambles, spilling every little detail (probably too many details) to the demi-god who patiently listens and brews a pot of soothing hot tea that Terushima greedily grabs and indulges in as he recounts the night. 

Kita holds his own cup to his lips, hiding the smile playing on his face as the god talks about you, sharp eyes noting the unusual softness in Terushima’s eyes and quietness of his voice as he speaks about you, describing you so perfectly Kita can almost imagine exactly what you look like from his words alone.

But his smile turns into a thoughtful flat line at the sadness in the usually exuberant voice as the blonde tries to lightly wave it off and convince himself that it’s all in the past now, just another mortal he’s happened to interact with in his long life before breaking off into an awkward silence. 

“Terushima, not all relationships between gods and mortals are doomed and cursed.” 

Kita rolls his eyes as the other begins to squawk and flail his arms as he recounts some of the most tragic relationships in Olympus history to prove him wrong, quickly cutting him off after another languid sip of his hot beverage. 

“So do you think the union between my parents was also a mistake?” 

The demi-god smirks as Terushima squirms in his seat, floundering for words, weakly clarifying that he meant the majority, not all. 

“Exactly. Not all relationships between gods and mortals are destined for failure and we all know you’re certainly not like most gods. So if anyone were to beat those odds, I’d say it would have to be you.” 

Kita Shinsuke does not mince words. He does not care to flatter even the most supreme beings with unwarranted and undeserved pleasantries. He only calmly speaks his truth. So despite how casually the words are thrown, as if the demi-god was just mentioning the weather or how his day was, Terushima gapes at his long-time friend, letting the true weight of their meaning sink in. 

Not like most gods. 

Terushima has been called an outsider by both gods and humans alike his entire life, but for once, the title feels like something to be proud of, to hold his head up high and triumphantly proclaim, and he blinks back the tears threatening to slip from the corner of his eyes as he shakily returns the warm smile on Kita’s face, choking out a laugh between his sniffles at the demi-god’s next words.

“You’re not your father, Terushima. Don’t let Zeus- What does Poseidon call him these days? Ah yes, don’t give Shittykawa the satisfaction of ruining your chance at love and happiness.” 

It’s startling, absurd really, to hear the foul nickname from Kita’s usually polite and mannerly mouth, but it drives home his point that much more and almond eyes glint with steely resolve. 

If Kita notices how Terushima rarely spends the night in their shared home anymore despite how he’d practically hibernated in his room during past winters, he doesn’t say anything.

If he notices how much more energetic and boisterous the god is despite the barren lands and frigid weather that would normally have dampened his spirits, he doesn’t comment on it. 

And if he just happens to accidentally meander around town and see a familiar blonde figure whose hand is interlaced with a mortal woman’s hand, he chalks it up to pure coincidence and certainly not because his curiosity had gotten the better of him. 

Kita Shinsuke is not nosy, even if the pictures he secretly takes of the couple and proudly develops, frames, and gifts to the god of wine during the holidays that year say otherwise.

It’s Terushima’s favorite and only gift he’s ever received during the human holiday season (although that quickly changes after he makes things official with you) and the first thing he hangs up on the walls of your shared bedroom years down the line when you move in together. 

And as he holds you in his arms and fondly smiles at the photos on the wall, reminiscing on the beginning of this joint journey with you, he thinks that winters aren’t so bad after all, affectionately kissing the top of your head as you snuggle and squirm closer to his body heat, slightly jostled by him adjusting and retucking both of you back in your warm and cozy blanket cocoon protecting you from the chilly air.  

He waits for you to settle back into a restful slumber before letting his own eyes drift shut once again, melting into the bedsheets and embrace of a place and person he can finally call home. 

[blackbulletsblackheart]

Haven't blogged in a while but here it goes since everyone is getting their two cents out there, I feel like just putting all my thoughts about this thing out there while everyone is talking about it.

So let me just start with, I haven't watched the last 5 episodes of Supernatural yet, my laptop fucked up when it started and I don't have anywhere else to watch it right now. But I have heard more than enough and seen enough clips from episode 18 and 20 to know what a shit show it ended up as.

When I first started watching Supernatural 7 years ago when there the 8th season had just finished, I really didn't pick up on Destiel as much as a lot of other people did. I didn't see it personally but I'm not someone who's going to fight against people's ships. Unless I find it's one that's ethically bad or a toxic pairing. Otherwise, everyone's ships to themselves. When I started rewatching Supernatural from the beginning before season 15 started, I did pick up on Destiel a LOT more especially since I had the later seasons to compare it to. And I don't mean just the "angel who's in love with you" jokes, I mean the genuine chemistry and some of the earlier moments between Dean and Cas. The difference between their relationship with each other and their relationship with every other character, even Sam.

Then I realised that after season 8, even more after season 9, that bond seemed to barely exist anymore. There were times that Cas seemed more like a burden to the main characters rather than the long lasting ally, friend and powered being protecting them that he used to be. As much as he still was, he didn't feel like family to the Winchesters anymore.

Then season 15 was coming around and people hoped that just maybe, finally, the Destiel fans would be given what they had wanted since "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition". There were some good scenes at the beginning that had some of that Destiel power that those earlier seasons did but most of the time it didn't feel as strong as those earlier seasons. I felt a lot from Cas in the "What about us is real" scene and from Dean in the Purgatory Prayer scene but otherwise, it just wasn't there anymore.

In my opinion, I thought that if they'd confirm Destiel in season 15, it would have to happen in the first half to pay off and feel worth it. When it got to the point that there were only 5 episodes left, I just kept thinking it would be a pisstake to confirm it now right and the end and such a cheap, inconsiderate way of doing it. We knew since season 13 that Cas was going to die by the end of this last season because of the deal with the Empty. Making Destiel canon in Castiel's final scene as being the only thing that would make Cas feel truly happy felt like being stranded in the desert and only given a drop of water to quench your thirst by the person pretending to rescue you.

It got to a point where I thought they really just shouldn't do it anymore. Leave Destiel to the fans who have done so much better with it in their fanart and fanfiction. Destiel was done better in that "Cas, get out of my ass" line than it was in that dying declaration.

It definitely has a lot to do with who is working behind the scenes on the show too. They are the ones who decide how the scripts and the big stories go afterall. And there was definitely more Destiel when Eric Kripke and Sera Gamble were still around. They were dedicated to fleshing out every character, making them grow and making the audience continue to care about them after so many years. After they left, the main characters became so two dimensional compared to what they were before. The actors may have been great but the writing had become more wooden, no matter how good the overarching season storyline was. The only characters that seemed to develop well over the last few seasons were Crowley, Rowena and Jack, the latter two because they were entirely new characters.

It's really shitty of the CW to have Misha make that statement yesterday too. They've always put this emphasis on the show being Jared and Jensen's, I get that they were what the show started with, but Misha has been as important to them on the show for years yet the only time the CW has made him a prominent figure of the SPN Family was to put out this statement to cover their producers asses. Not Jared and Jensen, their favoured faces of the show, but Misha, the one who was kept around because of how much fans loved him and how much the show tended to fail when he wasn't around. (Remember how ratings dropped with Misha's absence and picked up again with his return in season?) Putting that on Misha - the most LGBTQ+ and Destiel supportive member of the main cast, the guy who didn't want to marry his bisexual wife until she had the right to marry a woman if she wanted to - to make that statement was fucking disrespectful.

And the ending of the show? I was worried it would be bad, I hoped it wouldn't be, but I didn't think it would be THIS bad! I'm so worried about watching the rest now because of all the awfulness and cringeworthy scenes I've seen clips of or heard about but I know I still will watch it soon.

[takaraphoenix]

percy jackson for the ask game

Thanks for playing! ^^

Top 5 favourite characters: Percy Jackson, Nico di Angelo, Clarisse la Rue, Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano, Silena Beauregard

Other characters you like: Rachel Elizabeth Dare, Thalia Grace, Leo Valdez, Charles Beckendorf, Tyson

Least favourite characters: Hera, uuuhm I mean Drew I guess and Nancy?? I don’t know, I’ve gone through so many cycles with PJO, I’ve come around on most characters

Otps: again, let’s make that a Top Five? Nico/Percy, Jason/Percy, Octavian/Percy, Triton/Percy, Will/Pery

Notps: Percy/Annabeth, Leo/Calypso, Grover/Percy, Tyson/Percy, book Luke/Percy

Favourite friendships: Canon? Grover & Percy, Clarisse & Percy, Nico & Reyna

Favourite family: I meeean technically they are ALL family since all of the gods are siblings/cousins! ;D Okay, okay. Paul, Sally, Percy and Tyson! A very obvious pick

Favourite episodes: doesn’t have a TV show adaptation yet? xD

Favourite season/book/movie: The Battle of the Labyrinth

Favourite quotes: not really a quote-kinda-gal

Best musical moment: haven’t gotten to see the musical yet!

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: I mean obviously when black on white it was confirmed that Nico was in love with Percy? Like? You can imagine, yes? :D

When it really disappointed you: …so often *whispers softly, voice breaking* but to sum it up basically from The Mark of Athena through to the end. The above mentioned confession was honestly like the only highlight out of those three books...

Saddest moment: WHEN THEY KILLED OFF BECKENDORF AND THEN KILLED OFF SELINA. I CRIED THE WHOLE FUCKING DAY

Most well done character death: Luke’s death was shit, Ethan’s death was frustrating because it was a cheap cop out of an actual redemption arc I really hate the “chose the wrong side and now immediately dies in a Heroic Sacrifice”-trope (which plays into why Luke’s death was shit), Bianca’s death was ridiculous - the fact that out of ALL of the Huntresses they picked the one who had been a huntress for 0.2 DAYS was just pathetic and literally projectd “this 12 year old child with zero combat training is totally gonna die” all along and it pisses me off so much, while Silena and Beckendorf made me cry they were also frustrating because they were avoidable had people used their brains, Octavian’s death genuinely made me furious because it was played for cheap laughs... I guess Bob and Damansen by default then...?

Favourite guest star: uuuuuuuh I got nothing

Favourite cast member: Leven Rambin as Clarisse la Rue?? Holy shit blessed casting thank you

Character you wish was still alive: ...one? I only get one? *distressed Phoe-noises* Silena? Charles? Ethan? Urgh. How dare you make me pick only one...

One thing you hope really happens: ...I know there are people out there still reading the new books and I wouldn’t wish this for them because they clearly still enjoy it, but good gods do I wish Riordan would just finally stop and give Percy a rest. Like, not even stop writing - he could write new things. but stop dragging Percy Jackson personally into everything, be that visiting the Norse because hey it’s his gf’s cousin, or getting dragged into Apollo’s weird shit, seriously just... move on, please

Most shocking twist: quite truthfully that Ares was the traitorous god in The Lightning Thief and not Hades. I am so used to Hades being painted as The Bad Guy and the Evil Mastermind bullshit that it was genuinely so refreshing that no actually he’s just wronged because he wants his property back too and he’s not actually the bad guy??

When did you start watching/reading?: 2010, I guess, right after I saw the movie for the first time

Best animal/creature: BLACKJACK BLACKJACK BLACKJACK. No wait Mrs. O’Leary is also there! :O Both? Both!

Favourite location: THE UNDERWORLD

Trope you wish they would stop using: Everyone Needs To Be Paired Up! Seriously, obsessive shipping in canon is cringey but if you have a literal ship with seven crewmates and it turns out to be three couples and the seventh is first in a Love Triangle with one of the couples and THEN gets his own girlfriend, that’s... that’s genuinely pathetic, like I would raise a judgemental eyebrow at a fanfiction that ships everyone off this perfectly paired up, but a published actual work that is not the author’s very first publication? That’s embarrassing, man

One thing this show/book/film does better than others: portrayal of Greek gods and myths

Funniest moments: snarky Percy sassing gods :D

Couple you would like to see: This implies a non-canon couple I’d like to see become canon and just honestly, genuinely, none, good gods there is already too much romance as it is, dial it back

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: honestly, the second movie took the two only fancasts that were dear to me and actually cast them. Anthony Head as Chiron and Nathan Fillion as Hermes. That was such perfect casting and were my only casting wishes, so like... I got nothing

Favourite outfit: Clarisse’s movie outfit?? It’s? So? Good??

Favourite item: I mean, Riptide is really practical?

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: A very dear friend of mine gave me the movie poster for the second movie and it is hanging on my ceiling :D But other than that, sadly enough this franchise is not exactly heavy on merch - which is ridiculous to me... the opportunities. Please make this into a cartoon and start producing ALL of the figures and toys. All of them. Seriously, the toy opportunity on this franchise is so huge??

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: uuuuuuh honestly no god really fits me so I don’t know

Most boring plotline: Annabeth’s third book side-quest really bore me

Most laughably bad moment: When they had a prophecy about an “angel’s breath” and Annabeth Chase, daughter of ATHENA, stood right there, not figuring it out - but Piper did. That... That did Annabeth such a freaking disservice, seriously the disrespect from Riordan there. Why did you even make her a daughter of wisdom if you aren’t going to use her to be clever? That actively made me bang my head against the nearest wall because it was such an obvious part of the riddle like seeeriously

Best flashback/flashfoward if any: I loved learning more about Annabeth, Luke and Thalia’s past together

Most layered character: I mean Percy, but that’s also due to getting five books exclusively from his POV

Most one dimensional character: lol like the dozen or so characters who only exist as First Name Only? And yeah, I get it, you can’t flesh them all out more. But Jason Grace had a whole-ass life before he came to CHB and we got name-drops of his closest friends in The Lost Hero, but most of them remained a name only and Jason not only didn’t get to team up with them later on, to try and convince them to join his cause, he also never actively thought about them. I don’t know, but if I’d spend months away from all my friends, I would definitely spend some of my POV thinking about them...

Scariest moment: thiiis was not a scary series

Grossest moment: When Riordan tried to sell domestic violence as cute, aka Annabeth judo-flipping her boyfriend in punishment for getting abducted by a goddess :D”““ what the fuq

Best looking male: if we go by actors, I guess Chris Rodriguez? xD

Best looking female: oooh definitely Clarisse when we go with the movie faces *^*

Who you’re crushing on (if any): mmmh yeah no

Favourite cast moment: I do not know any xD”

Favourite transportation: shadow-travel! It’s so cool

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): them entering the underworld was pretty damn cool??

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: NICO’S AGE. CONSISTENCY. Stop posting things that contradict each other like just stop tweeting canons out if you don’t have a fixed list of what is canon. ALSO SALLY’S MOTHER IS NAMED LAURA, SHE WAS NAMED LAURA FOR YEARS BEFORE YOU FORGOT THAT YOU NAMED THAT CHARACTER LAURA AND NOW SALLY NAMED HER CANON DAUGHTER FUCKING ESTELLE AFTER HER MOTHER’S NEW NAME. Good gods. How do professional authors not have lists to crosscheck about vital information of their own characters, like their birthdates and their parents’ names.

Best promo: I don’t watch promos

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: Honestly before I watched the movie already, when I read on wikipedia that a son of Hades was not just A Good Guy in this bookseries but also a main character :D

IN DEPTH FANDOM QUESTIONS

[psychicnymph]

what happened to aphroditedolan?

hi everyone. i’m here to address the questions that i know many of you will ask. my sudden departure from the dolan twins fandom was not an entirely impulsive decision, so i’m here to explain.

first and foremost, i deactivated because of the sheer amount of blatant, cruel, and unacceptable disrespect i endured while writing for fun and for free. i would spend hours, upon days, upon weeks, upon months working on projects and i still got this disrespect. people were critical of my appearance, my strong-willed and passionate nature, the way i presented myself online -- but, amazingly, never of my writing. see, truth be told, arrogance in tote, my writing is phenomenal. it was rare that you’d catch a spelling or grammatical error (which is a direct result of my educational privilege, i recognize), each plot was well thought-out, each descriptor would bring the scenery, the characters, the erotic scenes to life; you name it, i took the time to near-perfect it. i wrote, edited, sometimes went as far as rewriting -- my point is, i was dedicated. 

a few weeks ago, i even took the time to completely reorganize my blog; i gathered and linked all the small concepts & blurbs i wrote and put them into a masterlist, on top of updating my fic masterlist to be more aesthetically pleasing, cleaner, and editing pictures myself to put them on both masterlists. i did this because i was excited to continue the two short series which i had started: Let Me Get That For You and A Girl is a Gun. additionally, i had ideas, WIPs, and other projects i was planning and writing for that i couldn’t wait to embark on -- and then, it was like something changed in the fandom.

well, i suppose i can’t say changed. let’s say more like... got exponentially worse.

from the very beginning, there were two types of people who i noticed in the twins’ tumblr fandom: there were those who earned their numbers, and there were those who preached ideas of entitlement. there was also a hierarchy: big blogs, and small blogs. it was like a caste system of its own kind. i’d like to discuss this for a brief moment.

when i first started writing, i was absolutely nobody in the fandom. i wasn’t on other platforms, i hadn’t been a stan for very long, i didn’t know anybody -- the tumblr fandom was where i wanted to start and, for the most part, ended up staying. i mention this because at the time of aphroditedolan’s deletion, i was considered a “big blog.” how did i go from small to big, then? if it’s a caste system, how could i have transitioned?

the answer is simple. the system you all created doesn’t exist. in this fandom, you are either entitled or you are talented, and that’s about it.

i never sat around begging people to like, reblog, or read my work, and i never pleaded for followers. i got them because i put out good, consistent, beautiful writing. i interacted with people, i wrote for prompts, i reached out and cultivated friendships, i did what i went to tumblr to do: write and be part of a community that loved the dolan twins. that’s it. the numbers came through hard work, dedication, and most of all, earning every one of them. 

no one on this earth or any other is entitled to likes, reads, reblogs, comments, kind words, attention, followers, or anything of the sort. yes, everyone deserves those things; no, you shouldn’t just get them. you should strive to earn these things. and honestly, while i think everyone is deserving of a chance, not everyone is cut out to be a writer. not everyone is made or meant for this art. because it’s an art. it’s a skill that needs to be developed and practiced. you can’t just sit down and bang out some writing. you absolutely must be dedicated and passionate about it if you ever want a taste of being successful. and that’s just it; some of you are doing this for the wrong reasons. you do it for the numbers. numbers do not fucking matter. they aren’t even real. it’s just a count of people who have physically interacted with your post, or people who actually decided to follow you.

everyone deserves to have their craft appreciated, but when you just start writing for the attention you think it’ll get you, that’s not a craft. that’s you doing the things you see others doing because you see the attention they get and you want a piece of that for yourself. it’s a shitty, horrible motive. and then, when it’s obvious that writing isn’t your strongest talent or even a genuine passion of yours, you whine about some system that isn’t fair, you create something to blame for your lack of success -- of course, it must be the bigger blogs.

i’m proof that that just isn’t true and y’all are lying to yourselves. in less than a year, i ended up with 4k followers and extremely successful pieces. again, because i earned it. through time, effort, and dedication, i earned it.

another thing that came with the culture of entitlement in the fandom was people being self-pitying in order to evoke guilt in their audience, so that people would go and tell them, no, your writing is so good, keep it up. they did it as a means of getting the attention they hadn’t earned. people got into the habit of trying to use me for more attention. they would feign friendliness, interest in my blog, etc., all to say, hey, can you check out my writing and reblog it?

i don’t fuck with that shit. it’s a huge part of why i had to turn my submissions off and my messages off from people i didn’t follow. i don’t like people who only care about numbers and want to use me for more numbers. it was beyond disrespectful that people thought i couldn’t see what they were trying to do; honey, manipulation is a skill just like any other, and i’m better at it than you are. don’t try it on me.

besides the overly-entitled, suffocating people who would shit on, criticize, and blame others for their low numbers which resulted from their sheer lack of effort and self-awareness (and by this i mean actually stopping to question 1. what is your motive here and 2. is what you’re producing actually good or is it slapped together messily?), there was also the culture of feedback to the writer from the audience. 

it was rare that i’d get any other response on my writing besides “part 2?” “more?” “part 2 plzzzz” “you need to update this” and etc.

how many times is the writing community gonna have to say that those comments aren’t helpful, kind, supportive, constructive, or ANYTHING besides annoying? they’re demanding. they push the idea that they just want more of the same ol’ shit. even after i made it blatantly clear on more than one occasion that i don’t take requests and would not be adding a part 2 to something unless it was upon my own discretion, there were still constant, never-ending, tireless requests for more, or requests in general. it was frustrating and infuriating. i was so tired of repeating myself. and when i stopped repeating myself and started linking people to asks or my FAQ where i had already answered that question, people wanted to act like i had an attitude. people gave me endless grief that i was a bitch, aggressive, had a shitty attitude; no, babe. i just wasn’t tolerant of poor treatment. you should try to start adopting this attitude for yourself. respect yourself and know your worth. it’s really as simple as that.

when the biphobic comments rolled around, i’d had enough. it’s when i decided to take my break, truly because i was furious (as i had every right to be) and because that whole situation made me not want to write at all. all my passion and motivation to finish projects i’d been so excited to do for you guys went out the window. it’s sad that y’all pushed me over the edge this way. i gave it time, i let the wounds heal, i let the anger fade, and i started an official hiatus to do this. i’m also in school again, which meant i’d be less active anyway, and it felt like a good idea to just put some distance between myself and the tumblr fandom. but the distance has only solidified the feeling that i’m just not appreciated as much as i deserve to be. and i don’t mean in numbers. i mean for the amount of effort i put in to get constant backlash on things that don’t even have to do with my writing, to work so hard only to be pissed the fuck off, to dedicate so much time and energy to a group of people only for y’all to erase my identity, send me hate, try to act big and tough and like you’re the shit behind anonymous... i’m good luv, enjoy.

there are also other factors; truths about some of the people in the fandom that are idolized, the constant plagiarism of my work, the overwhelming sense of responsibility that came with keeping up with my blog like it was a job, among other things that i don’t care to elaborate on.

so that’s it. i got tired of the same old shit and i know i deserve better. below, i’ll answer some questions that i think some people may be left with:

are you and luna still dating?

yes. for the last time, yes. we are dating. we are a couple. we love each other. we are in a long distance relationship and we are actually dating. not like two besties pretending to date because it’s quirky -- we are actually. fucking. dating. and no, nothing happened between us to make me make this decision. we are doing great.

are you gonna write ever again?

in my life? yes. for the twins, in this fandom, or on this platform? fuck no.

are you still a fan of the twins?

yes! oh my god, probably always. no matter where they go or what they pursue, i’m there with them. they have made my life better, and i have a lot to thank them for. i’ll just be enjoying their content from alllllllllll the way over here.

are you gonna be blogging about the twins?

not at all. in fact, i don’t even follow rockstardolan because i’m keeping my dash away from all of that. i’m not following any dt related blogs. i’m gonna do my thing over here, and love the twins in private, on my own terms. 

why did you delete all your writing?

in truth, after everything, i don’t even want it to remain there. i essentially wanted to erase my contribution and my footprint on this fandom. plus, having my writing just out and about, having already been plagiarized so i’m sure you can find some things in various illegal wattpad compilations, makes me worry about more people doing that. i wanted to keep that damage to a minimum. so yeah, they’re gone forever. 

what about your friends, people you interacted with, etc?

the people who matter will stay in touch. there are some people i’ve cut out from my life for good because they’re toxic and quite frankly i just don’t like them. i’m done subjecting myself to people i don’t even fucking like for the sake of keeping others happy. but, the good friends who respected me, treated me well, etc, they’ll reach out when they can. i’d say i encourage it, but i have a lot on my plate as is and have a hard enough time keeping up with things in the real world, let alone things online. there’s still love there, i’m just keeping a safe, healthy distance and doing what’s best for me. 

if you have other questions, you can feel free to ask, but i’m really not in the market for new friendships. it’s not that time in my life. i literally cannot handle more than what i’ve got on my plate, and i’m keeping my priorities in order. i don’t care if you think i’m rude, if you think i’m a bitch, if you think i’ve got a bad attitude, if you think i’m a piece of shit, if you’re angry, if you’re sad, even if you’re gonna miss me -- this is for me. i’m letting this out as a big, fat fuck you to the things and people that ruined my experience on aphroditedolan, and as an explanation for the few people who deserve it.

take care of yourselves. do the things that make you happy. don’t tolerate things that don’t make you happy. do no harm, take no shit, and most importantly,

stan the FUCKING dolan twins.

signed,

daniella/dani/aphroditedolan, however you have known me. 

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: The Joker (The Dark Knight)

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

The Joker is one of the most widely interpreted characters in all of media, with so many taking a stab at him that it should really not be a surprise that he’d end up in a Psycho Analysis. There are plenty of Jokers to talk about, so I feel it’s appropriate to start out with the best interpretation of the character thus far in live-action cinema: Heath Ledger’s Joker from The Dark Knight.

Really though, what can be said about this performance that hasn’t been said already a million times before? This performance is legendary, and truly makes the movie the modern classic that it is. This take on the Clown Prince of Crime, a more down to earth take, really helped shape and mold the decade of superhero films for the decade to come, for better or for worse.

Actor: Unless you have lived under a rock for the past decade, you are well aware that Brokeback Mountain’s Heath Ledger portrays Joker in the film, a casting choice that was widely derided when it was announced. Ledger would go on to prove all the naysayers wrong – dead wrong. His take on the Joker seems more in line with the character’s very first appearance in comics, where he was more about murder and black comedy than theatrics and cackling, and Heath sells you a version of the Joker that in the hands of anyone else would likely be unappealing to those who grew up with Hamill’s Joker. Add in a dash of characterization from the more nihilistic Joker from The Killing Joke, and Ledger managed to cook up a psychotic anarchist clown for audiences of every stripe to love to hate.

It’s worth noting that Ledger’s performance is practically unmatched in comic book cinema; despite Joker being ripped off in and out of comic book movies to oftentimes poor effect, very few villains managed to come close to the complexity and talent Ledger brought to the role. Only the MCU has managed to give villains of this level of quality – villains like Thanos, Killmonger, and Adrian Toomes – and even then it took them a decade to get to those. Incredible, isn’t it? The MCU, which has produced the best comic book movies since The Dark Knight came out, has only JUST managed to get villains with performances that match up to Ledger. Ledger’s performance is just that hard to match.

Motivation/Goals: The Joker’s goal is simple: he wants to kill the Batman. Okay, it isn’t that simple, but he’d sure love you to think that. The Joker very much seems to draw from his interpretation in The Killing Joke, especially in regards to Harvey, with him wanting to put the purest hearts of Gotham through the wringer to make them as warped and wicked as he is. He also wants to take Gotham from the organized crime and introduce his own brand of anarchic, disorganized crime, where criminal actions are done for the sake of it. Frankly, almost every action Joker does in this film can just be chalked up to him wanting to do it just because, but it’s hard to deny there’s an underlying genius to everything he does. Every move he makes is just so perfect and calculated, all in the sake of bringing ruin onto Gotham and destroying and crushing its hopes.

Personality: This Joker is much more subdued than, say, Hamill or Nicholson’s take on the character; the wacky props and the over-the-top showmanship are a lot more subdued, but it’s still easy to see that this Joker is a genuine Joker. He indulges in lots of black comedy, he’s constantly lying through his teeth, he’s underhanded and is constantly executing overcomplicated plans, he executes anyone when he feels they’ve outlived their usefulness, and most importantly of all, he really loves screwing with people. Much like the previous clown covered on Psycho Analysis, Joker truly seems to relish in the anarchy, misery, and suffering he causes others

Final Fate: The last we see of Joker, he’s dangling from a building and cackling like a madman. It’s easy to assume he was arrested, and the novelization of the sequel mentions he is the sole inmate of Arkham Asylum… maybe. He may have escaped, for all anyone knows. Sadly this lackluster ending is because Heath Ledger tragically died, and Christopher Nolan felt it would be disrespectful to have him appear in the sequel, even as a cameo using unused footage. It’s rather unsatisfying but it is understandable.

Best Scene: Every single scene could count. There is not one scene with Joker that is not iconic, awesome, and memorable. For my money though, the scene in which he walks out of the hospital dressed like a nurse and attempts to detonate the charges, only for them to not go off which leads with him fiddling with his detonator until things finally start to explode, is easily his best, funniest, and most wonderfully in-character moment in the film. It’s one of the most traditionally Joker-y things he does.

Best Quote: Pretty much everything out of his mouth is wonderful, but I think the gold medal has to be the first story he tells about how he got his scars. “Why. So. Serious?”

Final Thoughts & Score: Look, we all know Joker is getting a 10/10, it’s pretty obvious and we all know it’s what he deserves. And with that out of the way, I can just get right into the meat of why he’s so great.

Nolan’s Batman films are a more down-to-earth, darker, and realistic take on Batman, so they tended to sacrifice some of the more comic booky aspects of Batman in an attempt at realism, usually to good effect. For instance, there’s no Venom drug that Bane is hooked on, the Lazarus Pit is more metaphorical than literal, stuff like that. But Joker? Joker manages to straddle the line fairly well. It’s damn near impossible for a psychopath who dresses up like a clown to be taken 100% seriously, so while the Joker is toned down here, it’s not to the degree that someone like Ra’s al-Ghul was. Joker’s not wildly hammy, overly theatrical, and using guns that have little “BANG” flags in them, sure, but he’s still pretty funny, he still is a bit theatrical, and he’s still just as cunning as ever. As far as “realistic” takes on characters go, Joker is the absolute pinnacle. If you want to do a realistic take on a more unrealistic character while still staying true to them, this Joker is the character to look to.

There’s honestly not much to criticize here; like yes, I’m sure I could nitpick here and there, but for what it is this performance is utterly electrifying. However, it’s hard not to point out how, much like the movie he’s in, this Joker had quite an uneven impact, as a lot of movies tried ripping off the elements of the character that worked in the context of the film without understanding just why Ledger’s performance worked. One need look no further than the next cinematic interpretation of Joker courtesy of Jared Leto to see how toning down the Joker and trying to aim for gritty realism can backfire spectacularly. And then of course there are all the incredibly edgy people on the internet who take this Joker at face value and idolize him as some sort of philosophical wiseman espousing harsh truths about reality, when he is in fact a hypocritical liar who is constantly screwing with everyone around him; perhaps that only adds to his brilliance, though, as he managed to even pull one over on the audience.

Still, none of that is really Ledger’s fault; he had no way of knowing that his take on Joker would be ripped off or treated as some incredible intellectual instead of as a conniving madman who sought to crush hope and bring about chaos. Ledger may be gone, but he left us with a brilliant and unique take on a classic character, one that even years later still holds up as one of the greatest villain performances of all time in any media. To this day, people still talk about him, still try and theorize about his origins, still quote his lines; for better or for worse Joker is an icon, and while the worse in that equation is pretty bad, the better is what really matters and what we should really remember this incarnation of Joker for.

[lilyheardjamesfall]

Blinded

Chapter 4: Sweet Talk

Lily Evans was not easily intimidated. She was made of stern stuff, and felt that her character aided her greatly in overcoming almost any obstacle that came her way in social situations. She easily laughed off her own embarrassment, and would be the first to admit that she was not the prettiest face in the room. This is not to say that she was falsely modest, but that she was realistic and recognized the importance of other aspects of a person rather than their perceived attractiveness. In short, Lily Evans was an indomitable woman who was not easily cowed. That being said, she nonetheless was ready to quit Diagon Park the next morning.

It wasn’t that she had been ill-treated or made to feel a burden. In that regard, Lily had to admit that she had been pleasantly surprised at the hospitality, albeit with an air of haughtiness, that the London crew had offered. She had discovered a true kinship in both Mr. Black and Mr. Lupin, though it had been modulated carefully. She had enjoyed browsing Mr. Black’s library. Even her conversations with Mr. Potter and Miss Black, though not changing her opinion on them, were interesting. She just felt exhausted. Having to always be on her best behavior made her feel slightly paranoid. It was somewhat odd for Lily to try so hard at manners, but she did so for one reason and one reason only - her dearest sister Marlene Evans. If the budding romantic interest between Marlene and Mr. Black proved to have a firm foundation, she did not wish to cast any doubts on her own sister’s happiness or somehow sully her name with her own atrocious manners. So she smiled, she used correct language, and spent most of her time biting her tongue and trying her best not to let her attention drift. Only time would tell if her efforts would be for naught, but for now the objective of transferring back home was desirable above all else.

It was decided that Marlene would travel back by the Floo Network so as not to succumb once more to illness, but Lily insisted on taking the walk once more, saying that she had longed the past few days for a long stroll as she was in the habit of doing so often at home. Though her stubbornness was met with some initial skepticism, in the end Lily won out. After seeing her sister safely departed, the London quartet escorted Lily to the front door and bid her farewell. They all shook her hand. Mr. Black was truly sorry to see her go and commented that he would miss her wit and liveliness. Lily was flattered, but had to admit that she would also miss Mr. Black’s good sense of humor and cheeriness. Mr. Potter came last and spoke only a few terse words to her, but his handshake seemed to linger, and Lily felt queer at the feeling of their bare palms touching. She realized they had never touched before, and for some reason she felt a heat stain her cheeks. Her eyes snapped up to Mr. Potter’s hazel eyes, flickering with surprise before they shuttered over into an unreadable expression. Though she had much to reflect on during her walk home, her mind kept returning to the look in his eyes when their hands met. She felt it was the first time she had a genuine encounter with the man.

Upon Lily’s arrival at home, she was quickly filled in by her mother and Petunia on the latest gossip on the regiments in town. Lily had quite forgotten that there were regiments in town, for they were not a common topic of conversation at Diagon Park. This was most likely because no one there was interested in eligible and handsome young men. Lily had yet to see any of the regiments, but she found herself not much looking forward to the prospect. While a change of society was always welcome in the lull of the countryside, she felt that their company erred on the silly side of things, and she didn’t much feel the urge to laugh as she had before. She was most likely just tired. As she was about to excuse herself, Mr. Evans walked into the room with a letter in his hand.

“Mrs. Evans, I hope you have a good dinner prepared today. I have reason to expect company,” he said, his voice grave. The four women looked up at him curiously, sensing the seriousness about him.

“Why who could it be? It certainly isn’t Mrs. Prewett for she would have called or written to myself,” Mrs. Evans retorted.

“The person in question is a stranger and a gentleman,” Mr. Evans stated, a mischievous twinkle returning to his eye.

“Why you mean Mr. Black! Marlene, how lovely it will be to have him for dinner. Heavens! I must get to town and get a fine cut of meat! The fish that I have surely isn’t fine enough for him.” Mrs. Evans made to bustle out of the room, but was impeded by Mr. Evans.

“It is not Mr. Black. In fact, it is someone I have never seen in my whole life.” This got the desired reaction and all four women began exclaiming at once. “I received a letter from Mr. Frank Longbottom, who you remember will inherit when I am dead and may turn you out and do as he pleases!” Mr. Evans explained.

Immediately Mrs. Evans interjected. “Do not mention that odious man’s name in this house!”

“Ah, but Mrs. Evans. You ought to read the letter he has sent me.” He handed the letter to Mrs. Evans, who was obliged to read it aloud.

Dear Sir,

The disagreement lasting between yourself and my late father always gave me much uneasiness, and since I have had the misfortune to lose him, I have always wanted to heal the rift. For some time I was kept back by my own doubts, afraid of whether or not that would be disrespecting the memory of my own father and also how you would react. But my mind was changed as I recently received a parsonage under the patronage of the esteemed lady Druella Malfoy widow of Cygnus Malfoy. As a clergyman I feel it is my duty to promote and establish a lasting peace within all families within my influence. As the division within our Wizarding Society are deepened by the erroneous rebel that shall not be named, it is all the more important to put disagreements behind us and present a united front. If you are not averse to the idea, I would most kindly ask your permission to visit you the Saturday a fortnight from hence.  I offer my greetings to Mrs. Evans and your daughters and eagerly await your response.

Respectfully yours,

Frank Longbottom

No one knew what to make of the letter, but there was little they could do besides ensure that the dinner went well, and so they set about preparing the house and their spirits for the impending visit of Mr. Longbottom. Mrs. Evans’ nervous chatter escalated throughout the day as everyone else’s patience shortened. It was all Lily could do from bursting into one of her tirades on the idiocy that solely male inheritance produced.

Mr. Longbottom produced himself on their doorstep promptly for dinner, and though there was the expected stiltedness on new acquaintanceship, Mr. Longbottom clearly did his most to put them at ease in his own manner. He was a sturdy man of seven and twenty, dressed in the black that his profession favored. He was not displeasing to look at, but did not possess a memorable face. His eyes skittered often over the company, as if studying them carefully, and his manners were relatively sober and grave. Lily reflected privately to herself that these manners are most likely what endeared him to entering into life as a pastor.

Mr. Longbottom did not wait long to shower them with praise, complimenting Mrs. Evans on the beauty of her daughters. “I had heard that your daughters were the most beautiful in all of Cokeworth, but I must say that in this case the rumors do not quite do them justice,” he stated, albeit it with little warmth, his eyes fixed on Marlene, who quickly looked down. Lily couldn’t tell if it was from modesty or to hide the sardonic smile that Lily knew to be there. The compliments were not terribly pleasing to anybody but Mrs. Evans who found herself liking Mr. Longbottom despite her firm resolutions all day not to do anything but continue to find him odious.

After dinner was announced, Mr. Evans finally engaged Mr. Longbottom in conversation over a topic that he thought was relatively safe - that of Lady Druella Malfoy. Mr. Longbottom could not find enough words to express his adulation of Lady Malfoy. She was his most esteemed patroness, a noble witch of incredible status that did not make her overly haughty. He admitted that there were many who thought her a touch too self-important, but he personally had been invited by her to dine at her manor several times, and he found her to be just as proud as she ought to be with her impeccable magic bloodlines. She had not only humbled herself to visit him in his parsonage, but also approved of his modifications and hinted at the hope of Mr. Longbottom soon having a wife who could appreciate them. It was clear that no one quite knew the appropriate response to his enthusiastic praise of Lady Malfoy.

“I am sure that she is all that you say and more,” Mrs. Evan stated. “It’s a pity that more great ladies aren’t more like her. Does she live near you?”

“The garden in which my parsonage is located is only separated by a lane to her estate, Grimmauld Park.”

“Does Lady Malfoy have any children?” Mrs. Evans asked. Lily glanced at her warily, knowing that the conversation would tend towards matchmaking if the lady had any male children.

“Lady Malfoy has been blessed with only one daughter, who will inherit everything when she dies,” Mr. Longbottom stated, as he cut his meat into very precise and similar sized segments.

“How fortunate for her!” Mrs Evans exclaimed. “And is she handsome?”

“She is a charming young lady, and blessed with excellent manners. Unfortunately, Miss Narcissa has a sickly constitution which has prevented her from pursuing many accomplishments, and her mother even had her discontinue the study of magic when it was clear that it was taking a toll on her. But Lady Malfoy has often made clear that had her health allowed it, Miss Narcissa would have been a formidable witch.”

“Has she been presented? I do not recall ever seeing anyone of that name at court.” Lily could not recall the last time she had participated in conversation quite this dull. She had spent the last few days with people who were haughty, yes, but they had redeeming qualities and for the most part did not dominate the conversation. Lily shook herself. Was she truly yearning for their company in the presence of Mr. Longbottom? That was utterly preposterous. She forced her mind to return to the matter at hand.

“Regrettably her health does not allow her to travel far and she has therefore not spent much time in town and has not been presented at court. Though I have often observed to Lady Malfoy that she has deprived the British Court of its brightest ornament. Her ladyship was very pleased with the idea and has often repeated it. I am more than happy to offer these little compliments that are so acceptable to ladies.”

Lily met Mr. Evans eyes over the table and hurriedly returned to her potatoes for she didn’t know if she could hold a straight face at the expression on her father's countenance. “It is happy for you that you possess the talent to flatter with such delicacy,” Mr. Evans pursued, picking up his glass of wine with a studied air. “I must ask - are these pleasing attentions fruit of the moment or are they the result of previous study?”

“They often derive from what is passing at the time, but sometimes I like to amuse myself by composing such elegant little compliments, but they must always be given with as an unstudied air as possible.” As if to prove his point, Mr. Longbottom studied his plate of carefully cut meat with an air of satisfaction before delicately setting down his knife and beginning to eat his meal with the dedication of a man who eats for sustenance and not out of gusto.

Mr. Evans expectations were fulfilled - his cousin was as odd as he had hoped, and he listened to him with earnest enjoyment, not having witnessed such a spectacle in a while. He maintained the most resolute composure, though he often glanced at Lily in shared, yet carefully concealed, merriment. After the dinner had been cleared away and Mr. Longbottom had given his predetermined compliments, Mr. Evans suggested that they pass the time by having Mr. Longbottom read to them. He agreed, though he objected to the novel that was initially brought forth. After much deliberation, he decided upon Fordyce’s Sermons and read to them in a monotone voice that allowed Lily’s mind to wander.

Was this to be their lot? To have their entire estate, living, and money passed on to this earnest and slightly ridiculous man? And all for what reasons? The delicacy of a female constitution? Lily chafed at the idea. But she knew there was little to be done. Though it would scandalize her family if they knew her plans, she was all the more determined to embark on her path towards becoming a Healer. Once her sisters’ futures were secured and the question of their marriages settled, she would proceed with her path. She did not want to hurt their opportunities in finding good matches and being comfortably taken care of, but she would rather work for her money. The evening passed and Lily was relieved to beg an early evening from the exhaustion of her move from Diagon Park that day and beat a hasty retreat to her chamber and her own thoughts.

Mr. Longbottom was a man of contradictions. Though he had studied extensively, his manner was reserved, stiltedly formal, and insipid. The humility of his office counteracted the pride that very position instilled in him, leading to a most strange existence in social circles. Mr. Longbottom had set for Cokeworth with the intention of finding a wife, for he now had a good house and an adequate income to provide for her, as well as the blessing of Lady Malfoy, who directed his life in more ways than one. He had hoped to secure the hand of one of the Evans girls, for it would be most convenient for both parties and ease many tensions that still lingered between the two families. His evening with the Evans family pleased him immensely, and from the first his intentions rested on Marlene, for she was the oldest, and therefore made the most sense for Mr. Longbottom when it came to inheriting the estate. The fact that she was also the loveliest of the three only strengthened his intentions to do right by his family.

The following morning, he brought the matter to the attention of Mrs. Evans, who was most pleased at his agreeable manner. She found it incumbent upon herself to hint that she believed that Miss Evans was soon to be engaged, but alluded to the fact that her other daughters were without obstacle. Without a fuss, Mr. Longbottom transferred his intentions to the second daughter, Miss Lily Evans. He had no qualms about her, for she had an intelligence about her, and though her allure was not the classic beauty found in Marlene, she had a different sort of charm - the beauty that one noticed immediately due to it being striking - from her coloring and her manner, she stood out, and was therefore beautiful. Mrs. Evans treasured the hint that Mr. Longbottom would pursue one of her daughters, and the thought of two of her daughters married contented her so much that the man of whom she could not speak of the day before was now high in her good graces.

Petunia intended to walk into town that day, and both of her sisters were eager to escape the house and the prospect of some entertainment in town. Mr. Evans bid Mr. Longbottom to join them so that he could have a few hours of peace, for Mr. Longbottom loved the sound of his own voice. He joined them gladly, and the party set off to town, attending to Mr. Longbottom’s inane chatter and giving the required encouraging responses when necessary. Once they arrived in town, however, the attention was drawn from Mr. Longbottom. The prospect of officers was much more interesting, and even the most studied of compliments could not distract the girls’ attention from them.

Their attentions were soon rewarded for they had the pleasure of encountering a fine young man with a gentlemanlike countenance and genteel manners, introduced to them by Mr. Cattermole. The young man's name was Mr. Severus Snape, and he had just joined the regiments the day before. This delighted the girls all the more, for a handsome young man is completed by his participation in the army and the colorful array of buckles and ribbons that entailed. After their introduction, Mr. Snape drew them into conversation so engaging that they barely noticed how much time had passed. They were drawn from their conversation only by the arrival of Mr. Black and Mr. Potter on horseback. They joined the conversation, the principal characters being Mr. Black and Miss Evans, who felt it had been too long since they had seen one another. Mr. Black stated that they had been on their way to Spinner’s End now to pay them a visit. Mr. Potter agreed with a bow, and was beginning to determine to not fix eyes on Miss Lily Evans when they were suddenly arrested by the sight of Mr. Snape. Lily, quite by chance, observed Mr. Potter’s face as they saw one another, and was astonished to see that both changed color - one paled, and the other went red. After a few moments Mr. Snape touched his hat, and Mr. Potter returned the gesture - stiffly - and turned his horse the other direction, plodding off. Lily was puzzled. It was impossible to know what the meaning of what had occurred was, but it was equally impossible not to long to know. Mr. Black left shortly after Mr. Potter, not realizing what had happened.

Upon their own exclamations at the lateness of the hour, Mr. Snape asked if he could have the pleasure of accompanying them part of the way home. They all agreed readily, and during their walk back, Lily and Mr. Snape ended up trailing the group and conversing easily. Lily was burning with the desire to ask about his encounter with Mr. Potter, but was unsure as to how to bring up the subject. Luckily, Mr. Snape did it for her, enquiring how long Mr. Potter had been settled in Diagon Park.

“About a month,” Lily responded, but was unable to move on to the next subject, and felt obliged to add something in a similar vein. “He is a man of very large property in Godric’s Hollow, I have heard.”

“Indeed,” Snape replied. “His estate is quite noble. It is clearly ten thousand annually, and you could not get your information from a more reliable source, for I have been connected with the Potter family from my infancy.”

Lily was astounded, and she could not hide her emotions quickly enough, for Mr. Snape smiled wryly at the expression that crossed her face. “Yes, Miss Evans. You are no doubt surprised by the statement given how coldly we greeted each other earlier. Forgive my impertinence in asking, but are you much acquainted with Mr. Potter?”

“As much as I could ever want to be. I spent four days in the same house as him and find him to be a most disagreeable man.” Lily thought back to the dance and his haughtiness at refusing to dance with her. But it was more than that particular slight, she knew so.

“I have no right to give my own opinion for I have known him too long to be impartial when it comes to him. I am surprised, however, at how confidently you speak your opinion. Mr. Potter is generally well-liked.”

“Well, most of Cokeworth thinks him too proud. He is not seen too favorably here.” Lily could say that with certainty, for she had heard several people besides her mother mention Mr. Potter in low and alarmed tones.

“I cannot pretend to be sorry. I wonder if he is to remain in the country much longer.”

“I cannot say that I know - I have not heard anything regarding his plans in the countryside. But I do hope that your plans will not be affected by his presence.” She sincerely hoped that he would not leave Cokeworth because of the presence of Mr. Potter. His company was most pleasing to Lily, and she found he was the distraction that she had been looking for. Her normal company was not nearly as interesting as the colorful Mr. Snape.

“Oh, it is not for me to be driven away,” Mr. Snape replied, somewhat forcefully. “If he wishes to avoid seeing me, he must go. We are not on good terms, and though it pains me to see him, I have no reason to avoid him. Oh, had you known his father, Miss Lily. He was the best man that ever breathed,  and the truest friend I ever had. That is what pains me so in being in the presence of Mr. Potter. His manner towards me has been scandalous, but what hurts me the most is the way in which he dishonors his father's memory.” There was a faraway look in Snape’s eyes, and Lily knew he must be recollecting the late Mr. Potter.

Lily felt her curiosity grow even stronger. Mustering up her courage, she asked Mr. Snape. “Forgive me, but what is the nature of how Mr. Potter has disgraced himself? I have heard nothing of it here.”

Mr. Snape stopped walking for a moment, his eyes flicking to her, studying her. He seemed to come to a decision and continued walking, his hands clasped behind his back. “A military life is not what I had intended to do with my life, Miss Lily. Like your Mr. Longbottom, I was also to have a profession within the church. The late Mr. Potter left me the next post in the best parsonage in his living. His kindness was insurmountable. He meant to provide for me, but when that pastor died, the parsonage was given to someone else.”

“Merlin! How could that be? How could his will be ignored? Why did you not seek legal counsel? Lily could not hide her astonishment, or the burst of anger that unfurled in the pit of her stomach.

“There was informality in the terms of the will which meant that the law would not aid me. A man of honor could not have doubted the late Mr. Potter’s intention, but Mr. Potter chose to doubt it - or to treat it as a recommendation. He claimed that I had forfeited my claim by extravagance and imprudence, or any excuse that he could fall back on. Certain it is that the living became vacant two years ago, and certain it is that I was of an age to hold it, and that it was given to another man. And it is no less certain that I cannot accuse myself of having done anything to deserve to lose it. I have a warm and unguarded disposition, and I may have perhaps spoke my opinion of him too freely. I can recall nothing worse. But it remains that we are very different as men and he hates me.”

“This is shocking! He deserves to be publicly exposed!” Now that Lily was past her initial shock,  she had to say she saw nothing in Mr. Potter’s character that contradicted what Snape was saying.

“Some time or other he will be exposed - but it won’t be by me. I could never betray his father, for his memory is stronger to me than any hurt his son may have caused to me.” Lily felt that this utterance only proved how gallant he was, and found him all the more handsome for those feelings.

“But what could his motive have been?” Lily asked after a moment of silence. For that was the only thing that was unaccounted for in the story, and she still could not grasp the utter cruelty that Mr. Potter had exhibited.

“A determined dislike of me,” Mr. Snape responded. “I cannot but imagine that his dislike stems from jealousy. Had the late Mr. Potter loved me less, Mr. Potter may have liked me more. I believe that his father’s attachment to me irritated him throughout life. His temperament does not do well under the threat of competition, and his father often showed preference to me.”

Lily remained incredulous. At last Mr. Potter’s character flaws had been revealed. She couldn’t help but remember when he had recounted his own faults to her not four days ago at Diagon Park. He had never mentioned jealousy, but perhaps it was intertwined within his pride, which he readily owned to. “I had not thought Mr. Potter so bad as this. I never liked him, but I thought that he just despised everyone in general. This act of revenge and maliciousness however, I did not expect from him.”

“I cannot trust myself on the subject. I can hardly be just to him,” Snape replied in clipped tones.

“How strange! I wonder that the very pride of this Mr. Potter has not made him just to you! For this pride should have made him too proud to be dishonest, for dishonesty I must call it.”

“Almost all of his actions may be traced to pride and pride has often been his closest friend. It has connected him nearer with virtue than any other feeling. But none of us are consistent, and in his behavior to me there were some stronger impulses even than pride,” replied Snape.

“Can such abominable pride as his have ever done him good?”

“Yes. It has often led him to be liberal and generous, to give his money freely, to display hospitality, to assist his tenants, and relieve the poor. Family pride and filial pride, for he is very proud of what his father was, have done this. Not to appear to disgrace his family, to degenerate from popular qualities, or lose that influence of the Godric House is a powerful motive. He also has brotherly pride, which with some brotherly affection makes him a very kind and careful guardian of his sister. You will generally hear him cried up as the most attentive and best of brothers.”

Lily had to admit that since she had heard of Mr. Potter’s sister, she had remained somewhat at odds with the image of Potter as a brother. He seemed so reserved she couldn’t really picture him within a family, and so she was all the more curious about this sister. “What's sort of girl is Miss Potter?”

“I wish I could call her amiable. It gives me pain to speak ill of a Potter. But she is too much like her brother, very very proud. As a child she was affectionate and pleasing and extremely fond of me. But she is nothing to me now. She is a handsome girl about fifteen or sixteen, and I understand highly accomplished. Since her father's death her home has been London, where a lady lives with her, and oversees her education.”

“I am astonished at his intimacy with Mr. Black. How can he seems good right itself, and is truly amiable, be in friendship for such a man? How can they suit each other? Do you know Mr. Black?”

“Not at all.” His tone expressed that he was not interested in getting to know him either, for there was a first undertone of dislike in his reply.

“He is a sweet tempered, amiable, charming man. He cannot know what Mr. Potter is.” Of this Lily was convinced. Mr. Black would never have formed an attachment to Mr. Potter had he known any of this. Perhaps he was more like Marlene than he thought - he may only see the best in anyone, and never see the faults in their character. Still, Black didn’t seem stupid or easily duped. Mr. Potter must have been very persuasive.

“Probably not. Mr. Potter can please where he chooses. He does not want the abilities. He can be a pleasant companion if he thinks it is worth his while. Among those who are all his equals in consequence, he is a very different man from what he is less prosperous. His pride never deserts him. But with the rich he is liberal-minded, just, sincere, rational, honorable, and perhaps agreeable, allowing something for fortune and figure.”

Changing the subject, Mr. Snape enquired after the parsonage that Mr. Longbottom was installed at. “Mr. Longbottom received his living from Lady Malfoy. I do not know how they were introduced, but they have not known each other long. He has taken up the position quite recently.”

“You know, or course, that Lady Malfoy and Mrs. Euphemia Potter were sisters. Lady Malfoy is the gentleman’s aunt.”

“I had not known that. I had never heard of her before the arrival of Mr. Longbottom. But do not fear, since his arrival I have heard of little else.” Lily did say that despite all of the terrible things she had just heard, the thought of Mr. Longbottom had a smile playing about her lips.

“Her daughter, Miss Narcissa Malfoy, is heiress to a very large fortune and estate, and it is thought that the cousins will marry and unite their lands and their money.”

“Mr. Longbottom speaks highly of Lady Malfoy, but I believe that it stems mostly from gratitude of his position. From what I can surmise, she sees to be just as prideful as her nephew.”

Mr. Snape grimaced.  “I have not seen her in many years, but from what I remember you are most certainly correct. She is excessively authoritative and insolent. She believe herself to be clever and accomplished because of her rank and enforces her opinions on anyone who interacts with her.” Lily was not surprised that such a person would be related to Mr. Potter, and prayed that she would never have the misfortune to cross her path. She took her leave of him as they were approaching her home, but found that her head was still full of him long after he was gone.

That night, she related a shortened version of the information she had heard to Marlene. She listened with concern and astonishment. She did not know how Mr. Potter could be so unworthy of Mr. Black’s friendship, for he was the most charming and gentle young man. Yet it was not in her nature to question the veracity of a young man with such an amiable appearance as Mr. Snape. The possibility of him having endured such unkindness and hardship was enough to engage her tender heart. For Marlene, then, nothing remained but to defend the conduct of each, and throw into the account of accident or mistake, whatever could not be explained.

Lily could not help but laugh at her sisters’ stubborn need to believe the best in everyone. “Laugh all you like Lily, but you will not laugh me out of my opinion. My dearest Lily, do consider in what a disgraceful light it places Mr. Potter, to be treating his father’s favorite in such a manner, someone his father had promised to provide for. It is impossible. No man of common humanity, no man who had any value for character could be capable of it. Can his most intimate friends be so deceived? I should think not.”

“I can much more easily believe in Mr. Black’s being imposed on, than that Mr. Snape should invent such a history himself as he gave. Facts, dates, everything he mentioned without ceremony. If it be not so, let Mr. Potter contradict it. Besides, there was truth in his looks.”

“It is most distressing. One does not know what to think.”

“I beg your pardon; one knows exactly what to think,” Lily retorted, torn between frustration and amusement at her sister’s adamant belief in the best of everyone. Marlene shrugged, and turned to blow out the candle by their bed. Marlene fell asleep quickly, but Lily’s mind kept racing, keeping her long from the comfort of sleep. Her thoughts were all a tangle, but she hoped that in the morning with the brightness of the new day, she would be able to solve the conundrum.

James was shaking. He registered the fact blankly, as he paced the library at Diagon Park, the only place he knew no one would disturb him. Well, perhaps Lupin, but he had gone out on an evening stroll with Miss Black. James needed to be away from prying eyes and put his own chaotic emotions back into order; he hoped that he hadn’t seemed to out of sorts this afternoon. He had been snippy with Black, but hopefully he put down to a bad mood and not to the bizarre encounter he’d had to day with Severus Snape. He stopped by the fireplace, placing his hand over the mantel and leaning against it, his posture slumped as he gazed into the crackling flames.

Snape’s face beside that of Miss Lily Evans sat before him in his mind, and his chest burned. How had they met one another? What was Snape doing here? What kind of lies was he telling her? He felt incredibly helpless, which only made him all the more angry. Every time he saw Snape, bad news quickly followed. He wished that Snape would stop appearing in his life, especially as he was just getting comfortable with it. He wondered whether Snape had followed him here, or whether it had just been fate. He had to have followed him here. Was he to have no peace in his life?

His rage had not subsided, but it had become less blinding and morphed into a pragmatic anger that was simmering in the back of his mind as he considered his next steps carefully. His thoughts turned to Lupin. Should he tell him that Snape was here? He was bound to discover it eventually. He took a few deep breaths and squared his shoulders. He would have to tell Lupin. Perhaps Lupin would quit the countryside and James would most likely follow. It was for the best that he leave, especially since his feelings were leading him to wish to stay. But he would not think of that now. First he had to break news to an old friend and to collect his own composure. But even with these steps decided upon, the pit of dread in his stomach remained, and James feared that sleep would not come easily that night.

AO3 I Fanfiction

[douxreviews]

The Hollow Crown - Series Review

“Let us sit upon the ground and tell sad stories of the death of kings.”

Occasionally, television reminds us that it can be a brilliant medium. It is easy to become cynical, believing that only a show that pretends to be reality or a comedy in which good actors spout terrible dialogue can be aired. Then, just as we despair, along comes something truly genius. The Hollow Crown is truly genius.

It is a series of four of Shakespeare’s history plays. Often performed together, these stories take us from the late years of Richard II’s reign through the reign of Henry V. Although we will never know if Shakespeare intended for these plays to be performed as a series, they work as one. The stories lead on to the next; characters appear in more than one; and, references are often made to earlier plays.

The BBC, once again, didn’t hold back when producing these four shows. Each has a dream cast and a dream director and they were all filmed on location in England. The music is gorgeous; the sets and the costumes are lush; the cinematography is stunning.

Shakespeare is not an author you can watch with one eye while doing the crossword. His language is dense and, because he wrote in the days prior to special effects, much of what is happening is spelled out in some detail. Your reward, however, for paying attention and concentrating on the play at hand is some of the most beautiful language ever written, at least in English. When that language is spoken by some of the greatest living English actors, it becomes magic.

Richard II

The story takes place over the last two years of Richard’s reign and shows us the rise of Harry Bolingbroke who will become Henry IV. The cast is magnificent, especially Patrick Stewart who, I would argue, is among the best of the RSC old guard. And, on a personal note, can I just say that James Purefoy in period costume works so much better than whatever it is that he is currently playing in The Following.

Like so much of Shakespeare, this play is much more complex than one would initially suspect. On the surface, it is about one king losing his throne to another. It is, however, so much more. It is the story of two men who face off against each other. One is a born leader; the other not so much.

Ben Winshaw, who deservedly won a BAFTA for this role, plays King Richard as weak and entitled, convinced by the divine right of kings that he is untouchable. As he makes the decisions he does, even without the benefit of history, we know that they are wrong and that he is making his downfall inevitable.

Rory Kinnear plays Bolingbroke, Henry IV by the end of the play. He plays the role with subtlety and grace, yet underneath it all is a man conflicted and tormented. He never wanted to be king; he just wanted back what was his.

The best example of this disparity is in the language used. Richard never strays from the royal plural; Bolingbroke never uses it once. Now Henry IV, Bolingbroke understands that the divine right of kings has been turned on its ear and his guilt at what he has done, both to his cousin and to the monarchy, is stunningly conveyed in the final scene.

This play is not performed often, but it should be. It is as strong as the three that follow it.

Henry IV, Part One

Many years have passed, and Henry IV is ensconced on the throne. He has aged and now is played by Jeremy Irons who is simply wonderful. “Uneasy lies the head” being a true statement, Henry has spent his reign wrestling with his guilt and with the constant threat of civil war as not everyone is thrilled about who is wearing the crown.

To make matters even more troubling for our king, his son and heir Hal is a right pain in the ass. Instead of hanging out with his father at court and becoming a mighty warrior, Hal chooses to spend his days hanging out in an Eastcheap tavern with Falstaff and other lowlifes. Tom Hiddleston plays Hal and does so with gusto.

Herein lies the tension of this play. Hal has two fathers; the king whom he disrespects and Falstaff whom he disrespects even more. Henry has two sons; Hal who makes him furious and Hotspur (one of the great Shakespearean names) who is not his son, but is the warrior supporting the crown. The problem is that Hotspur is hotheaded and feels that not only does he have a right to the throne as Richard’s true (and declared) heir, he has earned it.

The inevitable battle is truly epic and tough to watch. The producers did not hold back and the flying arrows and sword fights look amazingly real. Extras roll around in the mud and, at the end, all of our heroes look truly filthy and exhausted.

Hotspur and Henry face off and we see Hal become the true heir to the throne in front of our eyes. The language helps, but Hiddleston plays the scene to perfection as everything from the tone of his voice to the way he holds his head changes and becomes more regal.

Simon Russell Beale is the finest Falstaff, ever (he, too, won a well-deserved BAFTA). So many actors play the role going for the obvious laughs. Beale, on the other hand, manages to inject the character with pathos and humanity, and his paternal love for Hal is obvious to all. Admittedly, some of the humor is lost as a result of these choices, but I didn’t miss it. For maybe the first time ever, I understood what Hal saw in such a horror of a man.

This version is filled with wonderful character actors, too numerous to mention. However, I would be remiss if I didn’t send a shout out to Julie Waters who plays Mistress Quickly to perfection. These plays are slight on roles for women, but Waters manages to jump off the screen, going toe-to-toe with both Hiddleston and Beale and, more often than not, winning.

Henry IV, Part Two

This is my least favorite of the four plays, but I did like the choices that Richard Eyre (the director) made in his cuts. He turned what can be a turgid and, let’s face it, dull play into something interesting to watch. He turned it into a play about becoming old and facing death.

King Henry is approaching his death and he frets about the unsuitability of his son to wear the crown when he is gone. Although it takes a while to get there, the final scenes between Henry and Hal are mesmerizing. Irons and Hiddleston are wonderful as the mantle of power is passed, literally as Henry crowns his son. The very brief moment before all this happens, as Hal sits on the throne with his crown, tears running down his face, actually made me well up.

Hal’s other father is aging as well. Falstaff is completely deluded about what Hal’s becoming king will mean for his old friend. Convinced that a life of leisure and sack is just around the corner, Falstaff is biding his time. The scene in the tavern with Doll was tender and lovely. Here is an old man, aware of his mortality, trying to drum up sympathy for his plight. It is all too late, as his past actions are catching up with him.

Never do they catch up more than at the end of the play and Beale plays Falstaff’s final humiliation to perfection. Genuinely shocked by Hal’s change of heart, the emotion races across his face while the newly crowned king dismisses him out of hand. Hiddleston plays this scene extraordinarily well. It is clear that he is doing what he must and what he believes is right, but there are hints that he wishes he could have avoided this scene all together.

Henry V

The producers were up against it filming this play. Undoubtedly the best known of the history plays, it is filled with speeches that are so well known, they are quoted and paraphrased in nearly everything one watches. Additionally, every English actor worth his salt has performed the role at one point or another and Kenneth Branagh filmed a version that would be tough to beat.

It is also, arguably, the most English of all Shakespeare’s plays. By that, I mean it is patriotism in its purest form. The English king, a reformed bad boy, travels to France and, against all odds, triumphs over his adversaries. Throw in the St. Crispin’s Day speech, and I want to stand tall and salute the St. George’s Cross.

The Hollow Crown version, although not the best, worked in terms of the series. It brought to a satisfying close the arc of a weak king, succeeded by a stronger king, succeeded by the most famous king of them all. Hiddleston was better as the younger playboy than he was as a fierce warrior, but when Henry disguises himself to walk amongst his troops before the battle, he was believable -- we had already seen it.

The problem I had with this version is that Hiddleston is on his own, and he doesn’t quite carry it off. He does not have a Jeremy Irons or a Simon Russell Beale with whom to interact and his final scene with Princess Katherine should have at least some degree of sexual tension. This did not.

Having said that, I pity anyone who has to take on the St. Crispin’s Day speech and make it his own. This one was fantastic. Rather than shout it from the ramparts, the director chose to have Hal speak it to “a happy few” and to speak it from the heart. I found myself grinning at the end of it.

The end was also an interesting choice. The director chose to have Falstaff’s boy, who appears sporadically throughout the play, age and turn into John Hurt who had been voicing the role of the Chorus. He breaks the fourth wall in the final moments and it worked. It reminded us that we are watching is, indeed, history and that time passes for us all.

I’m convinced that if Shakespeare is looking down at some of the schlock being performed in his name, he is sighing with relief at these. I’d like to think that, like me, he wishes they hadn’t stopped, but had continued on with Richard III.

ChrisB is a freelance writer who spends more time than she ought in front of a television screen or with a book in her hand.

[xxnaomimidnightxx]

Chandler Riggs Still Deserves Better And So Does The Walking Dead

Spoilers for season 8

I'm still angry about this and I refuse to let it go. Later this month we will see the passing of Carl Grimes, played by Chandler Riggs on 'The Walking Dead.' And I have this to say:

It's so pointless as to why they're doing it like Carl was meant to be the last man standing that's the whole point of his character, his death is going to effect all of the characters and show as a whole.

One of the actors on the show I genuinely feel bad for is Andrew Lincoln, who plays Rick, it's more sadder when you know how close they are and how Andrew now doesn't want to be in the show for multiple reasons. One reason is that he's constantly flying to and from America to go home to his family in England, Andy is spending 6 months away from his wife and kids. The producers used to let Andy fly his family over for the time they would be filming and now they don't and I think Chandler leaving the show just added to Andy is feeling about staying in the show.

Also what did they think they where gonna gain out of Carls death apart from some increases of views for that one episode so people can say goodbye to a much loved character, the views won't remain up if anything they will go down.

Carls been such a wasted character just as they were giving him more of a storyline and defining his character and who his going to be they kill him off for no reason other than they didn't want to pay him the money he deserves.

And now if things couldn't get any worse they are now trying to get people's hopes up. In an interview Robert Kirkman decided to say that Carl isn't dead yet, so he might not die. Like obviously he isn't going to survive stop being dicks by trying to get people's hopes up it's a bit cruel when you think about it.

Also on the issue of Lauren Cohan, who plays Maggie is rumoured to have quit the show after being treated unfairly by AMC and once again Scott Gimple (totally didn't see that coming.) She apparently has been being paid less than actors such as Andrew Lincoln and Norman Reedus. She asked for a pay rise to which they said they'd half her pay and then they said they'd give her a rise but not a lot and she has refused. And honesty I don't blame her she was getting so many other offers that were going to be paying her a lot more that what AMC where so I can see why she would leave.

So now we might also be losing Maggie.

Not to mention that half of the main cast hasn't even signed on to do the new season so we might not even get one.

Chandler Riggs is such a good actor and it's such a shame that in the walking dead we will never see how good of an actor he can be. Chandler was in the show for over half of his life and this is how they decide to re-pay him for everything he's done. Chandler is a good enough actor to carry the show and he's proved that so many times when they've had him have a bit of a side story. Not only is killing Carl of a disrespect to the comic books is also disrespecting Chandler and everything he's ever done. What was the point of him being on the walking dead if they wouldn't even let him have his moment to shine like everyone else. And with his resent tweets I think he's just as annoyed as we are.

Also Jeffery Dean Morgan was also upset at the choice of killing off Carl as he was promised he was going to do that storyline with Chandler Riggs. They also became close because they had meetings where they would sit down and get to know each other because they thought they would being doing their storyline and they wanted to have that connection so that they'd know each other quite well. Because of these sessions they actually became friends so the act of killing Carl annoyed Jeff a lot.

#TheWalkingDeadDeservesBetter

[powercouragewisdom]

I came across this, and it has to be shared: Everyone believing it was “10 years ago” and it’s so far in the past:

Everyone else:

2 & 3 months after beginning work for Marvel, these were posted, 2nd one almost 5 years ago. 

Bonus from the same year:

Notice how none of the tweets on this post indicate in tone or text that they are a “joke”

I took up very little space with others’ stupidity at the top, but before we proceed, let’s get some things straight: 1. “He didnt mean it” You don’t know what he meant, you don’t know him personally, and he meant them is more likely which is why he left them up until 6 days ago.  2. “He didnt hurt anyone” addressed far below. 3. “10 years ago” Last tweet was 6 years ago, & Happened nonstop between ages 41-46 over 5 years..about how long its been since his last visible pedophile thought. Along with jokes about rape, lgbt, 9/11, etc 4. “He apologized for this in 2012″ No. He never apologized for these tweets in 2012. He apologized for anti-lgbt and sexist comments. *btw The apology here was made before the 2 pedo tweets above* He went from bigot to abuse poster in record time 5. “But GotG cast is supporting him” and it’s not hard to understand why. These are people that, most of them, were fairly obscure as actors, not prominent or at the forefront of everyone’s minds before gotg (dave, pom, karen, chris p). These people were nothing fame-wise. James gave them an opportunity, a platform to be pushed forward on with its success. They owe him their notariety and relevance, and they are thankful and grateful for the support and help he gave, leading them and making them feel great while working. Of course they are going to defend him! They only know him as this, instead of other things he may be. Don’t put more on it than there is, and simply understand where they’re coming from WhatNoOneSaidAboutGOTGcast: it is very unwise and stupid if you speak out against and don’t support a director, because it can lead to you not getting jobs as an actor, not being hired and other directors/execs thinking you won’t support them if something hits the fan. There’s a reason Zoe’s, Pom’s, Chris’ and Karen’s tweets are very vague and general.. Now, here’s what the rest of us know:

*coughjeremyrennercoughrdjcoughcountlessothercelebritiesyouattackcough*

- *6 years ago Remember to pay attention to how none of the tweets you will see in this post indicate in tone or text that they are a “joke”

and he was so scared and in a rush to “clean up” everything, he slipped:

bottom line:

he “apologized” because he [had to]. if Kevin Spacey hadn’t messed up his “apology” you would still be some of his fans ”You don’t know that he hurt anyone!!” His tweets have hurt many, and you don’t know that he hasn’t touched children. One of his director friends (Huston Huddleston) is convicted of possession of child pornography and contacting a minor with the intent to commit a felony. He sent James a vid of child porn and James responded saying he masturbated to it, on the same blog with the monkey thing screencapped far below. An apology to perpetrators is like toilet paper; used to keep sh** off you, until forgotten residue of the next dump threatens to make you stink.

Did you see what he said? The only reason they’re “old” is because that’s when guardians started. Someone who’s been comfortable putting this garbage in the atmosphere over 5 years would not see a reason to stop unless they had to. in a moment of clarity and sanity, as someone pointed out earlier, he even said he won’t say he’s better:

that’s a big middle finger to everyone claiming he “grew” from this the only truth you have, literally the only truth you know, is that he didn’t post these on twitter after 2012. No proof that he grew because you don’t know him personally. growing implies elevation and improvement, a more desired version of the previous, whereas this implies “I’m more of a tulip now than a lilac” stop taking a weak string of apology and holding on to it for proof that he is or isn’t something so you can feel good about a movie!  he literally just said he was different, could be he just kept existing and accumulating, rolling around the universe until something else grabbed his attention instead of an abuse fantasy lifestyle that inspired over 10,000 tweets and God knows what else it can mean simply taking the thoughts to another medium/platform.

moving right along,

Nambla-

and

enjoy-

I dare you to continue to think someone like this who did over 10,000 of these in his 40s , which only disappeared after guardians started, should continue being comfortable in hollywood and have the access and connections that come with that, including to people’s children. who are auditioning or born into the industry  and

This is literally jailtime.

a lovely excerpt from his deleted blog:

theres much more lest we not forget:

karma is my favorite kind of tea™ So:

read this carefully:

As for another celebrity on his team:

gotta wonder why.

Due to the length and content It can be concluded that this person has a very off mind. Anyone comfortable thinking about let alone writing, this, there has to be something wrong. If he were posting tweets or videos about animal abuse fantasies re-read my previous two sentences and see if they fit you would say the same thing and it is literally the same thing. talking about animal abuse fantasies is literally the same thing. talking about child abuse is the same as talking about animal abuse for years enjoying child abuse content is the same as enjoying animal abuse content child abuse and animal abuse are in the same category i’m so sorry for your loss of contentment and comfort in thinking otherwise. Disney will never rehire this person and it’s laughable that people think they will. The ignorance, dismissal and disrespect he has shown toward people who have dealt with the serious content he made fun of of is something no one should take lightly, no one cares if it was 20 years ago. Some things #SPOILERALERT are more horrible than others (RDJ’s struggle with drugs and alcohol is not comparable, sorry kids B)  ^This honestly is why Johnny D is, and John Lass was still employed by them; he resigned last I saw.  Johnny has been most people’s favorite public figure for decades and has been seen volunteering and working with disadvantaged and disabled children for years, instead of anything suggesting abusing them. Even with alcohol and beating on his ex wife, those are still seen as not as abhorrent as hurting people/children who’ve faced trauma. Because of who he is and human nature understanding some things as worse, it is what it is. John Lasseter, same thing. I didnt see allegations or issues relating to kids and harming them, but he harassed and abused women and other people. With this, it still isn’t him harming, or producing anything that would harm children. More to get straight: "Disney had problematic stuff" the people responsible for those racist cartoons don't exist anymore and aren't working for disney. NEXT “Seth MacFarlane and MatT & TrEy” The difference is painfully clear: The creators of family guy and south park present inappropriate characters and situations that make fun of the perpetrators and show how ridiculous they are, instead of the victims, other characters chiming in. It really is that simple, I have seen it all. It is clear in the delivery of content and the context that’s shown. If they didn’t these juggernaut shows accessed by most of America would have been canceled so fast you would have whiplash. If you want to complain about something in feeble support, use Robot Chicken, a show featuring CSA, animal abuse, rape and Jesus’ death on the cross as a gameshow. A show featured on a network that’s supporting another guy being persecuted for abuse media...hm

Honestly at this point most of the people defending him are likely either pedophiles themselves or know people who are. if he was a poc or a woman, let’s not bother with what this would look like. no one would be crying real tears about how they should get their job back.

this is not only terrible, but dangerous. rape culture is a thing bc first it was funny normalize the joke, normalize the thing. dismissing as just a joke, is allowing everyone to think its ok/naturalizing it & if somethings wrong, dismiss it as a joke all you can do is hope that he has actually stopped and that its genuine since people love animals more than people these days, if he posted 10,000 videos/tweets about animal torture and abuse, how would you feel? he didn't actually torture them.. have a nice day

[all-i-wanna-write]

🎃 Wanna One as supernatural creatures  👻 - Hyung Line

[ Masterlist ] [ In honor of just making this blog as well as spooky spooks fest coming up in a few days, here’s a Halloween inspired Wanna One imagine! It’s lengthy for a first post so it’s under read more. 👻 Maknae line will be posted tomorrow! 

- Admin V ]

Yoon Jisung 

a very gentle vampire

you wouldn’t think he would be a vampire upon first glance

like he looks so happy and sunshine-y all the time that it doesnt seem like it

but then you know guanlin saw him sipping blood from a coffee mug labeled “#1 sucker” and that was that

he also had to convince guanlin that he didn’t go around randomly feeding on people

no one knows his age

“a wise man never reveals his age.”

“isnt it secrets?”

“shh daniel, go eat your red meat.”

he may be a creature of the night but he is literal sunshine

he works as a doctor 

ha ha vampire as a doctor how generic

he genuinely likes helping people with his vast knowledge that he collected over the many many years hes been here

he lives in the little home above sungwoon’s shop

he drinks the packets of blood he gets from work that no one uses and is generally good about his feeding

he only ever needs to feed once every two weeks or so 

when he’s missed out on a feeding session due to something he secludes himself from other people until sungwoon is able to make a replacement blood supplement for him

when he goes without blood for a prolonged period of time his eyes turn red 

he tries to maintain his manners but he can only hold back the urges so long

don’t hurt his children he will bite

literally

hes very protective of those he has deemed as family

because he didn’t have a family for as long as he can remember

so the members are his family

Ha Sungwoon  

he has everything

tonic for sickness? 

got it

potion to make someone fall in love with you?

he sells those

Pepsi?

yes, but he keeps it in a vial for some reason and no one knows why

he is following in the footsteps of his previous master and is running the old shop

which has been altered to look more like a store to blend in with society more

“people were looking at the place weirdly hyung”

“i liked how it was daehwi!”

“get with the times hyung! :(”

sungwoon didn't really grow up in society when he was training so he doesn't really get why he cant just rant about rabbits feet and troll leather and its magical properties in public

or why you cant just have this hut looking thing be inbetween large corporate buildings

the place where a lot of the members actually live is above his store 

but yeah he is a potion maker if you want to be real about this and he sells potions that generally are just used for pranks and makes the big money.

but he also is the one to help jisung when he cant get blood in time and never charges him.

actually he never charges any of wanna one.

he denies any statements about being soft as “i owed you a favor im just repaying it”

“you made me hot chocolate hyung”

“you didnt trip me that one time thats why”

don’t let that tsundere attitude fool you hes soft for the members

overall him as an alchemist doesn't change much

he just has much more stuff

which = mess = angry minhyun

but overall he is a very smol potion maker who helps his friends with their ailments and cares a lot despite denying such 

Hwang Minhyun 

a literal Angel™

no really hes actually an angel

you can literally almost see the halo above his head

and he does have wings! 

he just hides them

because he knows that walking around with large hulking wings is not normal in society 

he came to earth a long time ago and is mostly done with humanity but still tries

its just hard sometimes

he came upon jisung a long time ago and despite,,, beliefs he had at first about what jisung was

(he literally tried to throw garlic at him and jisung just stared at him and laughed so hard he cried

minhyun was really confused)

he came to understand jisung and the two are close friends

nowadays he volunteers at local community centers and pounds

he says that he is a very responsible being but no one believes him

especially when he came home drenched wet holding a kitty in his jacket

“why didnt you just use your wings to cover you and the cat?”

“ill be honest, i didnt think of that at the time.”

he cleans the home they all live in because they are all such messes

well not all of them

actually its really only jaehwan

which he doesn't understand cause jaehwan is literally a ghost

he sings whenever he cleans and its the prettiest thing to hear 

it enamors all of the residents of the humble home

tl;dr don’t hurt this precious man you’ll have a horde of angry supernatural after you

Ong Seongwoo

actually he’s just fully human

,,,

with a catch

he hunts down demons

not the ones who try to live peacefully like jisung

the bad ones that cause harm to people and other beings

a Good Demon Hunter ™

he doesn't necessarily live in the home with the rest of the gang 

mostly due to the fact he really cant put any of his equipment there without giving minhyun a heart attack

who wouldnt get the scare of a lifetime when you see someone casually polishing a large katana that had blood on it

but hes basically there 24/7 when he doesn’t have a job to do

like it’ll be three am and daniel would be getting up to get a drink and nearly go wolf and attack in surprise at seongwoo casually sitting on the couch watching tv eating some ramyeon 

daniel does help him with his job sometimes! but seongwoo doesn’t let him go to the dangerous ones

a. cause he cares about daniel

b. jisung would actually kill him

hes still a jokester and plays pranks with the others

tells spooky stories about demons hes hunted to rile up the kids

is then told off later by jisung who had to deal with daehwi nearly shooting his head off with a spell and woojin setting fire to his bed in alarm

“whoops”

when hes on the job tho

hoo boy

he turns so serious, a complete opposite from that jokester persona he puts on around the gang

there are a lot more jobs around halloween than any other time because hallow’s eve is when demons are at their highest activity rate

so that means he gets no sleep as he hunts down demons

he doesn’t stop until his job is done

so you could not see him for weeks

then all of a sudden hes just there eating corn flakes like

“sup, how ya doing?” 

and he’ll have his arm in a cast, multiple limbs wrapped up, and be limping

but is just so casual about it

save this man

Kim Jaehwan

so funny story

hes dead

no like

he died a while ago but

hes a ghost now

hes learned how to manifest his energy in a more physical being though!

but this is also a bad thing because

he plays pranks

all the time

and he haunts sungwoon and minhyun so imagine how fun that must be for them

everyone jokingly calls him a banshee and says to move on already but they don’t actually mean that

he knows that too

so he just blows a kiss towards them and laughs as the cringe away

when he does become a more physical version of himself, he likes to play the guitar when minhyun sings

the combo is lovely

he lays on the other members who complain

and he just goes 

“i’m a ghost you cant push me off thats disrespecting the dead”

they threaten with salt and its like wow suddenly he has to go water his roof

one time someone managed to break in and he scared them so bad by floating through the doors

he didn’t actually know that there was a burglar he was going to go try and get one of those vials that sungwoon made that lets him eat food so he can eat something

hes now the guard dog for the house. 

he doesn’t remember how he died, no one does, and he doesn’t like to talk about it

overall, he’s a very mischievous ghost who does care about the people he haunts. 

Kang Daniel

alright i think a lot of people saw this one coming

our boi is a wolf

actually, he’s pretty young for a wolf

he still has a hard time actually turning and prefers to just stay human to eat his food and do other things

he’s getting the hang of it don't worry

he has his hyungs and friends to help him

when he is able to turn he is just a big fluffy dog to be very honest

one time when they were having a picnic at the local park and daniel was in wolf form for the day, seongwoo jokingly threw a ball for daniel to catch, thinking he wouldn't

daniel chased it all the way into the forest and brought it back

needless to say he won’t be able to live that down

ever

“so pup, did you eat dinner yet”

“hyung stop, it was one time”

he cant really eat a lot of produced stuff well

it doesn’t sit right with him

he cant have chocolate either

which really bums him out

que sungwoon to the rescue again with a potion for everything

so he lives off meat and vegetables

but he is somehow able to eat gummies just fine

which he is scolded for but he still does it anyways

he dances in his free time when he isn’t in school

or you know hunting

he doesn’t hunt often, and when he does it is only with small creatures

he feels bad afterward and doesn’t come out of his room for a while

poor wolfie

a living heater v.2

helps seongwoo with his hunts 

as in he tracks them but isn't allowed anywhere near the site for his safety

he complains but begrudgingly goes back 

he’s just a big ol dog who wants to eat what he wants and dance in peace 

[welikeitspicyreviews-blog]

Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino 2019 Essay (Open, Panti Sisters & Lola Igna)

The Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino (PPP) is a seven-day in length festivity of Philippine Cinema where new quality genre Filipino films are screened for seven days in every single normal film across the country. No foreign films will be screened during PPP with the exception of in claim to fame films to give the open door for the entire nation to commend its very own local films. This occasion is sorted out by the Film Development Council of the Philippines in partnership with the National Cinema Association of the Philippines. PPP’s mission is to recognize Filipino artistry in films, promote our country and its talents globally, protect our film cultural heritage, and empower every Filipino through film development and education. Over the most recent years, PPP has made a culture of help from the crowd and FDCP tends to proceed with this custom to persistently draw in film buffs across the country to belittle local films. The Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP) advances and supports the improvement and development of the local film industry as a medium for the upliftment of the aesthetic, cultural, and social values of the nation for the better understanding and appreciation for the Filipino character.  A portion of the main Filipino movies to ever be produced using a century prior may feel totally exquisite, however its subjects do not: family, friendship, and love keep on resounding with many. What's more, with the 100th anniversary of Philippine cinema practically just around the corner, the coordinators of the Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino (PPP) disclosed their choice with featuring those components and to celebrate what these topics mean for us.

Romance is one of the most popular genres to watch, read and binge on. It is usually a genre where the story revolves around the love between two characters as they experience the highs and lows of love. Although most romance films end up with a happy ending ( e.g. guy gets girl, ends with a feel good 80s music and the like ), there are some that will leave you crying. Films like, Richard Linklater's ‘Before series’, Wong Kar Wai’s ‘Happy Together’ and Abdellatif Kechiche’s ‘Blue is the Warmest Color’ are one of my top picks. In Philippine Cinema, the most talked about romance film is Cathy Garcia-Molina’s One More Chance.  The film became very iconic for its painful narrative and dramatic cheesy lines that gained a cult following in social media and are still very relevant today. It shattered the hearts of Filipinos because of its sad concepts about long-term relationships, self-worth and second chances. In this year’s Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino, there is one film that stood out for me because it reminded me of the iconic love story of Popoy and Basha without a clichè happy ending and the concepts of an open relationship.

Open by Andoy Ranay is a film about two lovers, Ethan ( JC Santos ) and Rome ( Arci Muñoz ) who have been in a relationship for almost 14 years until their relationship has gone stale so they both explored the idea of going open. But for me, the film is really about Rome trying to get out of a toxic relationship where she thinks love is enough for her to stay even if it means that person is going to disrespect and hurt her. But mostly, it's about finding one’s self-worth. The film introduces a controversial concept of a relationship where couples are allowed to see other people which I think the writers did great. Apart from introducing the concept of open relationships, they were able to show a form of emotional abuse seen from JC Santos’ annoying character. 

The film didn’t focus on the open relationship a lot but I think it's a nice way to introduce it by giving the audience a disclaimer that this isn’t for everyone. When Rome starts to realize her worth, she was able to find her happiness. She finally was able to go back to her art and make a life all by herself. This cuts to Ethan realizing how toxic he was as a boyfriend through close-up shots of a wine bottle written “Rome” on it. Looking at the camera from the beginning till the end, its like going through a journey with her and from that, we were able to ask ourselves the same question, “Is this really what happiness feels like?” and in that moment, we are able to make that decision for her and for ourselves also. This cuts to a beautiful close up shot of rome, a few seconds before the credits start rolling. And finally, she is free. 

The film starts with Rome and Ethan arguing about getting into an open relationship or breaking up. In here, we are introduced to the idea that their relationship is not going to end well. Since every time the camera cuts to a close up shot of Rome’s face, she appears as if she’s indecisive and unsure. This concludes that Rome’s selfless character enables Ethan to allow the toxicity of his character to worsen. Comparing this to One More Chance, the film starts with the same kind of set up without the idea of an open relationship. But the only difference is that the dominance lies in Bea’s character, Basha. She already knows what she wants while we are being introduced to the toxic behavior of Popoy. They both have similarities in their cinematic universe. They show the same concept of friendship, the realization of one’s self worth from a toxic relationship and lastly, finding happiness in a workplace. But looking through past films by the same production and Star Cinema, they share the same formula. What makes the two different from each other? Work wins over love while the other, the same cliché ending — guy gets girl. Maybe why I couldn’t stop comparing it to One More Chance because of the obvious similarities. Hopefully, time will come for Philippine Cinema that we will get to see new things rather than the generic formulas given by these productions. In the end, all we can do is hope, be patient and support the local independent films.

Another film-in-competition is entitled, Panti Sisters. It is a film directed by Jun Lana and its about a terminally ill father offers P100 million inheritance to the first of his three gay sons who can give him a grandchild. Starring Paolo Ballesteros, Martin del Rosario and Christian Bables. Alongside veteran actors, John Arcilla and Carmi Martin as their parents. It is obvious that the movie looks like its other predecessors since most of the cast are Jun Lana’s frequent collaborators.  Jun Lana is known for making LGBTQ + themed films like, Ang Dalawang Mrs. Reyes, and Bakit Lahat ng Gwapo may Boyfriend? This director is the most youthful beneficiary of the Palanca Hall of Famer and champ of 11 Palanca Awards for Literature. Named the group top pick, he then won the Audience Choice honor, Best Production Design and Martin del Rosario won the Best Actor. 

This film is something that the filipino masses should go and watch. Despite that there are scenes in the film which doesn’t feel necessary to the narrative of the story and there are some lines felt pushed just to prove a point but so far, all the sad passionate lines worked as a mainstream film. It explores a host of social issues that are especially timely and need to be addressed such as the worsening or increasing discrimination and hatred against people who are part of the LGBT community, whose sole purpose is to receive basic human riights and to be treated fairly, that they should still fight for their rights because they are also people who should be respected and viewed as equal to all of us. There is no requirement for them to change with the goal that they can be treated as animals and can't be viewed as a plague in the public arena. May everybody comprehend that the issues that happen in our general public are not simply in their locale. The greater part of us make issues little or enormous, they really add to the social issues in which we live. We should inquire as to whether we are a piece of the arrangement or would we say we are simply adding to the enormous issue? The film's story also discusses the devastating effects of the patriarchy that John Arcilla characterizes as their father, Don Emilio y Panti. They perform well and post-character improvement will see every one of the principal characters.

Inevitably accomplishing the foreseen acknowledgment and regard they ached for from their dad prompted enthusiastic or energetic goals of the issues in the story, these scenes were deliberately terrible because of their magnificent exhibition or featuring John Arcilla. We can contrast this work with movies at the Metro Manila Film Festival with similar formula. Much the same as the films that Vice Ganda has starred in, for example, Fantastica, The Super Parental Guardians, Beauty and the Bestie, Praybeyt Benjamin and other celebrities who are for the most part worked with Wenn V. Deramas who is known for these movies. These ‘Funny portrayals of LGBT films”  are modest and you can't deny that they earn a place in all the blockbuster office since they have a huge part in mainstream films. Yet, when I contrast these movies with each other, The Panti Sisters is definitely has more substance which is why I think it deserves to be a part of the Pista ng Pelikulang Pilipino, despite the fact that it takes after Wenn V's works. It gave the audience a lot of good points about social issues that most FIlipinos are afraid to talk about and it's something that we won't see in a Wen V. Deramas film. Regardless of how genuine or surely understood the primary characters are, interestingly, they offer equity to the character and they perform well. We trust that individuals comprehend and comprehend the significance of examination, that the film isn't only for the solace and happiness regarding an individual, it suggests generally for the good of one's own, it might have been made in the general public in which we live. 

Lola Igna's movie is one of the films released at this year's Philippine Film Festival. It is directed and written by Eduardo Roy Jr. Angie Ferro is known for being the popular actress in the film industry as Lola Igna, with Yves Flores as Tim, Maria Isabel Lopez as Nida and Meryll Soriano as Ana, the main characters in the film. The film begins with a very mysterious and intriguing scene in which she performs her usual tasks. As she goes on with her daily activities, it is notably seen that flies were swarming around and she speaks to someone that isn’t shown by the camera. Lola Igna lived a simple life and could see her life alone in that cottage near a farm she owned. The film further showed that she had a family, Nida her granddaughter and his great-grandson Bok, the son of Nida. It is interesting to see that these are the only relative she has. As the story progresses, viewers are informed that Lola Igna's character may have earned the title of "the oldest living grandmother in the world." Lola Igna was so distracted that she didn't even understand why, all of a sudden everyone was paying attention to her. Lola Igna does not speak at all and often hurts people who visit her for the same reason that she does not know it. She is not used to this attention and she is very distracted. Lola Igna became an instant tourist attraction when the news of her being the oldest grandmother in the world was released. Merchandises of Lola were released due to her popularity. These merchandises were managed by her granddaughter, Nida. 

As viewers, we could not help but feel that they were using Lola Igna in a wrong manner, to the point that her little house became a tourist attraction. It's sad to think that this is happening in the reality that there are people who will actually use you for their personal development and often these people are near you or your own family. But we also came to the realization that Nida's family would never have had enough income if they had just grown their crops and kept watch over the store. However it is not right that they are forcing Lola Igna to entertain those that visits her. In the first place, Lola Igna doesn’t want the attention she was receiving. Until a surprise came, her other great-grandson, Tim came who was Anna's grandson. Her eyes were full of happiness and it was wonderful to think that of Lola Igna’s age she would not forget about who were relatives were even after a long time. Tim is an aspiring vlogger. Amidst Tim’s visit, it’s not hard to think and doubt him for only using Lola Igna’s current popularity as clout. If one would ponder, why would Tim suddenly appear in the midst of this popularity and didn’t come before Lola Igna’s recognition as the “oldest grandmother in the world”. Our anguish and doubts over whether or not he was really a grandson were even more apparent when the only subject of his videos were the ones of Lola Igna only. As the story progresses, we discover Lola Igna's thoughts and feelings. With each passing day that she spent in this world she became increasingly depressed. To live this long is considered a blessing and a great curse. We thought at that moment that we did not want her to die not because of the title she could obtain but for the reason that she was loved in their village.She is not difficult to love or to understand but we know for ourselves that we are being selfish because of that request but do we realize in ourselves that she should not live for someone else? Especially, if Lola Igna wants to rest in peace and take away all the pain she feels in the moment. How many friends and loved ones did she witness being alive and eventually buried death? How many times would she feel this so much sadness? If you place yourself in her shoes, it is only natural to ask God to take you and rest in the suffering she has been feeling for so long. No matter how difficult her family is to accept her wishes, they know that her situation is not difficult to understand. This feeling of Lola Igna was confirmed by the scene where she wept as she invited her guests in for a chance to see and take pictures with her. Amidst entertaining the tourists, Lola Igna then collapses due to fatigue. Nida realizes that Lola Igna can no longer get the title and with this money, it is more important for Lola Igna to wake up and be with them. Following this incident, Ana had returned after a long period of time when she ran away from their village resulted in her sister Nida campaigning and planting resentment. Ana is currently pregnant and seems to be giving birth due to the size of her stomach. Ana took care of Lola Igna in addition to resolving her personal issues with her son Tim and her sister Nida. Lola Igna woke up in disbelief at what she was seeing. Because of their long absence of communication and news of Ana, they had come to their senses that Ana might be dead. Anna asks for forgiveness from Lola Igna and her sister Nida. Grandma Igna says no one should apologize, these scenes are emotional because they highlight the importance and essence of having a family. It seems like the events in the movie will signal the end of the movie but the scenes that follow are truly sad. Ana unintentionally gave birth with her son at the middle of the fields near Lola Igna's house. Viewers were supposed to be happy with the new family member but Ana did not make it alive after she gave birth. As one added to them, there was also a retraction. Lola Igna assisted Ana giving birth. When she has since refused to do it because for her it only increases her life when she helps give birth to babies. Her new great-grandson was born with a broken heart and mourning the loss of one of her grand daughter who previously came back after running away. The situation is so sad that everyone is settled and for the first time they are a whole family with Lola Igna still with them but now again the pain and loneliness of the old woman will be felt again. Anna died in the arms of her son Tim, it was hard to see your mother being at her last dying breath, with the thought that you could do nothing more to prevent it. Death is inevitable and a part of human life. Some might want death to just arrive and take them, like Grandma Igna. Is there anything she has to do in this world that she is not allowed to lose? The very last scene in the film is really attention catcher in a very effective way to ponder or think deeper to understand Grandma Igna's passionate and emotional expressions. She just stared at the audience and said nothing but her eyes spoke for her. What might be the thoughts inside her head? But the real question is, “what would you feel if you were in Lola Igna’s place?

A realization has come to mind that Lola Igna isn’t all about the title of being the oldest grandmother in the world. Lola Igna ponders on the topic of life and death. Rarely do we see films that swims through the simplest reality of life. This film had portrayed that aging can be very terrifying yet mighty. Lola Igna is an old woman who is so close to her last days of life but death seems to avoid her. She had witnessed people’s growth younger than her like the petals within a bud starts to grow to the point where after it blooms, it is withered. Lola Igna’s old age makes her rant about how death seems to have forgotten about her. She was in her time of life when she had surpassed almost every relative she knew. It is heartbreaking when things start to get closer to you, that’s when you most understand and accept it. This is death for Lola Igna. Death is not something that is a grievous end. For some, it is something to honor for death is peaceful and after that you have nothing to worry about. In the last scene where Lola Igna is seen holding a baby, the look on her face carries powerful emotions that strikes the heart of those who looks. It is the face of someone who is tired and afraid, but had no choice but to live and wait. 

After watching all these films part of this year’s PPP, we came  to ponder and commend the directors behind it. It is difficult to tell stories not quite the same as what is typically portrayed. It is difficult casting new faces and hope they’d be more effective than the big stars existing. It is hard and not easy as anyone had said. Having the opportunity to produce films is a privilege and not a right. Furthermore, with that privilege comes the test to make it well as other existing films. It's anything but difficult to state something significant, to get recognition and yell it out and you would already be able to advise the world what they need to hear. It is hard to state something important through the medium of cinema, set aside some effort to figure out how to utilize each component of film to state what you mean better. A complete film that doesn’t simply beat the cutoff time. This privilege comes with a big weight to produce films with substance and without shallow meaning. 

For the future of Philippine cinema, we wish that the public audience would take risks out of their comfort zones in the movies they go out to see. How about we watch lighthearted comedies all we want like Panti Sisters or a love story like, Open. But at the same time, how about we also  watch something different. Documentaries, thriller movies, sad movies, unusual movies, stunning motion pictures. Something that isn’t mainstream or the movie that is not the first choice of the general public. One example of this is Lola Igna. Movies are not just about feeling better or being enchanted or beginning to look all starry eyed at. Movies are also about feeling agitated, feeling startled and disappointed. It is likewise about sentiments of misfortune, of vulnerability, of rushes and amazement. Movies are about such a significant number of different things, as well, other than simply fun and love. We wish that you let movies make you something and not simply give you what you generally expect of it.

[celebritylive]

Warning: This post contains spoilers. 

The waters are murky in Paradise this year — at least, for Blake Horstmann.

It was only the cast’s second day in Mexico when Tuesday’s episode of Bachelor in Paradise began, but several connections were already forming: Hannah Godwin and Dylan Barbour, Derek Peth and Demi Burnett, and Blake and his entourage of old and new flames.

As we learned on Monday’s season premiere, Blake dug himself into quite the hole when he slept with Kristina Schulman and Caelynn Miller-Keyes on back-to-back nights at Stagecoach, a three-day festival, in April. As the rest of the group started to piece the story together, his reputation began falling apart.

“Kristina, she’s arrived in Paradise and she has Blake going on the date. Blake and Kristina previously dated, so I just don’t understand it,” admitted Onyeka Ehie. “And then Caelynn told me he hooked up with both of them within one day of each other. That’s disgusting. Caelynn told me that he also said that she was a mistake and that she should keep it a secret and not tell anyone they hooked up. That is the most disrespectful thing you could say about someone.”

Indeed, everyone was confused as to why Kristina had used her date card on Blake, given their history. But as we quickly found out, it was because she had some serious grievances to air with him. When they finally sat down to talk, she brought up the Stagecoach love triangle and told him it felt like “a slap in the face” — and Blake was shocked to hear her address their past on-camera.

“I just never would have ambushed you like this,” he said. “You’re acting like I’m this really bad person. I didn’t do anything wrong.”

RELATED: Bachelor in Paradise‘s Demi Burnett Claps Back at Homophobic Tweets After Coming Out as Queer

With the two clearly unable to see eye-to-eye, Blake and Kristina headed back to the bungalows. And if Blake thought his “nightmare” day was over, he was wrong, because Caelynn immediately pulled him aside.

“I just feel really disrespected. I feel hurt,” she told him. “Paradise sucks for me. This has not been fun.”

“We know each other. Just acknowledge me, talk to me and don’t ignore me and make me feel like this f—ing dirty secret,” she continued, breaking into sobs. “I feel like a slimy, disgusting secret that you’re ashamed of. You literally told me to lie for you.”

Speechless, all Blake could do was apologize and insist he had no idea how she was feeling. She stormed off, and Blake, utterly defeated, was at a loss over what to do.

“My Paradise is over, man,” he said. “It looks like slept together and I bolted. And that wasn’t what happened. Sometimes you try to do the right thing — I didn’t want to disrespect Caelynn, I didn’t want to disrespect Kristina. Man, this is bad. I look like the worst human in the world.”

Things only got worse for him when Kristina pulled aside Tayshia Adams, who had gone on a date with Blake the day before, to fill her in on everything.

“I’m so confused right now. There’s no way I can trust Blake. I genuinely thought he was a good person, but really, he’s a freaking player. He’s the definition of a player,” Tayshia said. “To be quite honest with you, Blake just lost me.”

RELATED: Dean Unglert Says He Was ‘Completely Sober’ While Filming Season 6 of Bachelor in Paradise

Waking up on day three, Blake was a complete wreck.

“I’m going to have to really go into hiding, I know I am,” he told producers, sobbing. “It’s going to be hard on everybody in my life, because of what I did.”

“This is real life. I know this is television, but it’s my life,” he continued. “It’s over as I know it, my life is going to completely change, and not for the better.”

RELATED: Chris Harrison Says Bachelor in Paradise‘s Blake Will Shock People — and ‘Not in a Good Way’

With nine men and 12 women heading into the first cocktail party and rose ceremony that night, pretty much everything was up in the air — and Blake had some serious damage control to do. First, he grabbed Tayshia to see if she would be willing to give him another chance, but she made it clear it was over. Then, he grabbed Caelynn to apologize again, but she was nowhere near ready to forgive him.

Finally, he made one last-ditch effort with Hannah G. — and surprisingly, despite her close connection with Dylan, she hadn’t completely closed the door on their first-day flirtations. They kissed, and Blake was elated.

“This feeling right here is why I came to Paradise,” he said. “Tonight I’ll finally sleep good knowing that there’s hope with me and Hannah.”

But Hannah was more conflicted than ever.

“I’m having a hard time balancing being true to myself versus exploring relationships, which is what Paradise is about,” she said. “I don’t want to disrespect everything that I have with Dylan, because I’m so excited about that, but that conversation definitely put a twist on things.”

“Hi, I’m Hannah, and I’m in trouble this week,” she confessed.

Bachelor in Paradise airs Mondays and Tuesdays (8 p.m. ET) on ABC.

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