#it’s been a week tho bc uni has me busy

[spectral-muse]

Galdera dies TONIGHT.

[winryrockbellwannabe]

last day of summer diaries: 15/september

uni starts on monday - which is almost a relief bc im getting a little bored with the lack of routine and definitive goals. tho im sure i'll be begging for a break again in no time ahah

for my last day of summer break i have a lot of stuff to get done:

- work on welcoming speech for the 3rd year students. my entrepeneurship prof asked me and some other ppl from his class last year to go to his first class and advise the "kids" ahaha. it will be fun - pack for uni - decide which books to take with me to the little free libraries - grocery shopping once im back in uni city - meal prep for this first week of classes - answer A's text

hopefully this all manages to keep me busy and not let me overthink all my life choices - which has been my favorite pastime this last week lol

[aromantyczno-liryczna]

I'm at the stage of pmdd where I feel awful and guilty because I've convinced myself my flatmates hate me I've been avoiding them and the kitchen like the plague except for sometimes when I pass them on the stairs so I'll say hi or when one of my flatmates visits my floor and I feel terrible they have gone out drinking 6 nights in a row and that got me pissed even tho it's none of my business and they did try to include me and ask if I'm going the first few days but then they stopped bc I literally have been staying in my room all day then I started leaving early and returning late to take away that stress and after went out with friends Friday i was so chill it was the two glasses of alcohol but I thought that maybe I could do this and could go down to the kitchen but it's so impossible and my mum calls me everyday what did you have for lunch and I've been saying so much rubbish like all that food I had bought hasn't been touched even tho I said I've been eating it because she told me earlier how when she left on Saturday she was so worried how would I fend for myself when I was literally pushed into the deep end but she said she felt so much better after I explained how I was doing because I just know it would be 100% worse if i told her the truth. Anyway as I was saying my bread went mouldy and the cheesecake I thought everyone finished went mouldy and I do think my flatmates are nice because this girl asked if forgot that I had some and tbh I want to make an effort but I'm just so damn tired on Saturday they did a pub crawl and I thought maybe that's the perfect time but no i messed that up because I just didn't text them and then today they had a movie night and again that'd be a good way to break the ice but no i messed that up again because I'm sill sitting in the library at 1:50 am. And I was going to go back to my room but there's people downstairs so what did I do I went back to the library and now they're all jsut wondering where I am all week because they haven't seen me in days I do know names but I can't match some of the faces because I struggle with that I don't like being teased like 3 days ago one kf them asked if I know their names this isn't primary school ITS ALL S FUCKING STUPID I haven't used to my voice often enough i was literally going to cry on Friday because that was the first time I had people around me that week and it was nice to hang out and I'm just sad because my best friend hasn't even talked with me that much and he lives opposite me so now I'm panicking that a friendship of 7 years has gone to waste even though it was perfectly fine before move in I've literally been talking to my other friends back home more than i have been talking to people here and I want to attend the daytime events even but then I end up changing my mind last second what if went to the other uni the friends I've made are so nice though I just wish I lived in their flat instead we ordered pizza and we played smash bros so it was fun they don't all live in the same building they're spread out I was worried i wouldn't have anyone to get a 2nd year house with but they probably will because they're in the same kind if situation as me and anyway I was going to throw out the food yesterday something is blocking me from going inside the kitchen I even was meant to do the laundry because I'm running out of clothes too wear on the daily but did I do that? No and at the start I did keep my room clean but now it's all messy again I have to psyche myself up to go to the bathroom even though it's right next to my door so yes it is getting bad again

[atrirose]

back when enhablr used to be full of fics, headcanons and reaction. but now i see people wih the aesthetics, small texts but less works if i am not wrong.

when i see vissit a new enha writing blog, i see the themes, small texts. it's so irritating :( like how can you even see the small text... plus, the amount of symbols and other fonts they use, tsk

i am not blaming you :( but telling that mosot of enhablr has become aesthetic or something like top notch. everyone only focuses on how the blog themes, texts are but not the works.

but can i also know like what is suggestive?? isn't it like suggesting a sexual thought or something that leads to sex?? since you are an adult, i am asking you this.

but no, i literally see 15 or 16 year olds writing about suggestive stuff for enha, then telling mentions of fwb :0 i cannot believe when enhable used to have fluff fluff fluff where ever we searched.

i still remember you in my dash back in 2021, you wrote so much fluff istg, i used to wait for your works :( i wish we got that enhablr writing community back but literally wherver i see it is suggestive.

after all, this is my opinion...

hii ! at the start of the ask i thought you were shading me but ㅠㅠ yeah i understand what you mean , the fonts, themes, and small text usages has become more common now instead of the actual matter, i do use small text too but its only for the decor purposes, and my main focus (fics or hcs) are all large text with no fonts bc it is insensitive to use fancy text for those stuff and deprive people who cant read them, and i get that blogs do focus on their appearance more than the writing, bc let’s be honest people only see what they like to and if you look around if a blog ‘doesn’t look aesthetic’ people tend to ignore it even if the content is good. so bc of that many people have adopted the whole persona, i didnt change a lot except the fact i started posting a lot less and have not been active here, i think its a lot to do with adulting, all of the older members of enhablr now either have jobs/uni/exams or are just not feeling like doing this anymore.

and it’s totally fine for you to feel irritated by that, so u can js avoid those kind of blogs but you also need to remember that it’s their blog and they can chose what to do with it and how to decorate it, we can’t control that bc people have their own choices, but yeah the content being less i have seen a lot and i do agree with even tho i don’t read often i too get annoyed by the tags being flooded with nsfw content which is super creepy bc js few months ago it was all fluff as you mentioned and i hoped that the space stayed wholesome. i cant really control that but i hope people dont js see boys in that light.

suggestive to me is js a little bit more kissing/ implication of or suggestive jokes but i am not sure since i do not interact with those kind of content i might not be the best person to ask this, im sorry. but it is very uncomfortable when minors write nsfw.

HELP NOT YOU SAYING I POSTED A LOT 😛, jk anyways aww that is so sweet that i had someone waiting for me, i did post a lot of fluff and it will be a train ride if i read all my work, i will probably cringe 😔, i will always write fluff if that makes u happy if i do post in the future .. , sorry it’s js not the same anymore so i might not be the same atrirose who use to post every week. i am in touch with someone of my moots which were their with me since the start of this account or enha writer who use to flood the tag with tooth rotting fluff and well .. busy , busy , busy so i cant promise anything but hey we still have their old works you can binge. 

your opinion is totally valid.

[canayams-art]

the immortality concept in tgcf is always interesting to think about, especially with the age range that the human mind cannot really comprehend... but maybe it's best for me not to think too much about it at midnight when i have uni early in the morning 😞😭 there are a lot of thoughts tho

you described the dynamic i had in mind for them perfectly!! mq's way of showing care by scolding and nagging and teasing that at time could come out as a touch too sharp. lqq's of being loud when defending and engaging into banter but keeping it light and not taking the teasing too close to heart unless it comes to his morality stands. they just weirdly compliment one another, especially with the way you said lqq takes the spotlight on the stage while mq is more "behind the curtain" type when dealing with things. you're so right, thinking about them makes me deranged as well

i do feel like the gods would be more vocal about the dislike towards mq when he was still a young god, and yeah especially those 33. while mq we see is well respected, and still very much disliked and distrusted, it is mq of 800+ years of presence in the heavenly court, and i do think many would be tight lipped around him regarding whatever his business are. but thinking about the backlash he would be facing during their earlier years/ centuries of friendship, i think they would be more vocal about it, if a bit sneaky with the way they would talk considering mq's temper with fx and general reputation that has been following him. 🤔 and well... there's also the broom throwing thing that has been going on apparently :'))

and he would definitely be on the bigger receiving end of it than lqq, especially considering their backgrounds and what the heaven considers "right". while lqq may be considered naive, he is still a noble that technically belongs in a way mq never could in their eyes.

but lqq still not standing by the bullying, even during the 'fight' is ekejjejejeej especially because i lqq knows that bullying is wrong no matter who's at the receiving end and, parallel to the mulian situation, there would be no shielding behind the higher authority to make it stop, just a very straightforward way to handle it. and i feel like mq, even if he is somewhat even struggling to admit he's miserable without lqq, would feel extremely touched knowing the way lqq would handle it 🥹🥹

no shade at mulian, literally my fave ship ever! i talk about them so much to my friends i feel like all of our brains are fried at this point lol they can fit so much angst and there are honestly dozens of ideas for fics that would likely never see the light of the day but we have the hope cuz we're all delusional 😔✊

just the parallels between them make me absolutely crazy, especially since i always kinda pictured mq as a type to get particularly adopted by the idealistic "sunshine type" people around him and get dragged around while he scowls and acts like he doesn't enjoy it, and then eventually ending up genuinely liking them, no matter how much they would clash at times with their ideologies. xl, sqx, i have an ongoing rants about mq and qyz friendship every other week. kinda pissed off that i didn't remember lqq until recently but it's never too late to start the brainrot anyway

i also went and checked the extras qianqing interaction, and it was actually mq seeing that lqq was in an awkward position being both the victim and the culprit and trying to send him back to heaven (it was the extra chapter where xl felt pain bcs of the guoshi mask he melted into a key?? i only searched for their names so again i have no idea/) but that was enough to have me covering my mouth and squealing

no at this point i will have to write *something* about qianqing, it would literally eat at me alive if i don't. life is busy and hard rn, but it will have to be done in this lifetime 😭

Mq has always given me the sense that he seeks out people with more emotional freedom than he feels he has. He spends so much of his time showing restraint and being distant that whenever I read sections of the book where Fu Yao makes an appearance, I see the way he lets his personality come out more. Maybe choosing the name “Fu Yao” was (among other reasons) mq’s way of literally saying he’s giving himself more freedom.

So like— it makes sense that mq has a pattern of associating with people who express themselves so freely— even if he sometimes takes shots at those people (mostly fx but also occasionally xl). Lqq is entirely unrestrained in a way that’s familiar but still unique. He’s one of the few gods who would step in or stand up for another without any ulterior motives— there’s nothing lqq would want to gain by standing up for mq in their early years. Whether he’s still angry with mq or not— it’s the right thing to do and that’s enough for him.

Meanwhile I feel like mq hates feeling like he’s once again being seen to hide behind another prince for protection. Mq likes to be in control of his circumstances— even if he could ask for help.

“I don’t need anyone fighting my battles.”

“No— but someone should have your back.”

Maybe that’s what it is about them actually? Lqq is so quick to jump up and declare injustice that mq thinks lqq would be trying to shield him when lqq is actually trying to advocate for his better treatment. Lqq learned the importance of unity and he practiced it well before ascending, so his type of support might be less about defending mq personally and more about shaming the gods for not setting a better example. Maybe he doesn’t even give mq the option to hide behind him.

(Related note, I can’t help thinking this type of tension would rise if lqq caught mq throwing a broom or snapping it in half— like ofc lqq is still mad but ofc he’s gonna try and connect the dots— maybe he even heard some of the gods laughing about their “gifts” to the young General.)

But okay now I’m thinking about the extra you mentioned and oooooooo

Mq confronting lqq in the mortal realm and failing to convince him to return to heaven. It’s a side of lqq mq has never seen. He’s not driven by a sense for justice anymore, now lqq wants revenge— maybe mq tells him that. Maybe it only angers lqq more. Either way, lqq doesn’t return.

(I actually have a similar scenario in my brain between lqq and newly-mortal pei xiu, which was actually the idea that got me started in qianxiu rarepair hell but that’s a separate space altogether LMAO)

Anyway—! If writing is too exhausting given life’s demands I am always happy to keep exploring these deranged (affectionate) scenarios. Life persists, but so does the brainrot!

[angelsofneonandgarbage]

sorey for being a bit. scary on main. i just finished madk vol. 3 which is finally out in english and i was so excited for it but the ending is a near closed-loop cyclical ending which always really bothers me n puts me in a state in nihilistic anxiety/dissociation idk but also. it just makes me wanna feel things again. i wanna stop taking my meds. ive had the upped dose for a week ish now n its bringing back my paranoia which should settle in a week tops but it's bothering me bc it means i cant listen to tma bc that's creepy enough to set it off. sorry i swear my mental health has actually been better these last couple of days im slowly regaining mental functionality to an extent but i keep slipping and falling and i just. don't have the spoons to figure out every problem i have and address them enough to be functional again. like there's the attachment problems w my ex which keep coming back every time i feel like jm getting over them, the chronic exhaustion and general symptoms of pots, my meds fucking with me, general depression but also manic episodes, the fact im way over budget but my mum wants me to get her a 60 quid fountain pen for her birthday/mothers day and im not going to be there to see her around that time anyway sso i have even less of an excuse to cheap out. and ive been committedly lying abt my mental state to my parents to convince them im getting better than i was at xmas even tho im worse bc my mum will come up here and invade my uni life if she realises how bad i am doing

ah yeah i hate when fiction leads to like a major dissociative bit especially bc i love to use media as an escape when im floating out my body and then it goes and makes it worse and sets off a chain reaction of pent up shittiness? the absolute worst fr

not to sound like an overbearing parent but pls take ur meds !!!!! ik it sucks rn getting thru the adjustment phase but think of how things will change once u get used to them! u may not notice a crazy positive change right away but think of the small things. like u can listen to tma again once ur adapted to ur meds!! even if it’s something small that gets u thru daily tasks like that. u could take ur pills in the morning and be like “this is for u martin”

and oh god ex drama we both know that one well. idk if it would help but maybe if every time u have a like thought abt them that makes u feel any way that’s great just text me ur thoughts to try and get them out yk. like how i texted u like “the voices!!” when i was talking abt my ex like the other week pls feel free to do that back if u think it would help

and exhaustion and depression suck man i wish i had some like quippy little tip or smthn for u there but i’m suffering right there with u on those. and maybe just the thought that we’re going thru that together could help? holding ur hand thru the horrors <3

and oh man money problems r the worse omg. ik u said the pen is like 60 quid and mothers day is coming up so idk what ur like personal budget is looking like but me when i’m trying to make bigger purchases is i set aside a few bucks a day like just a few dollars $2 or $3 nothing that seems like a lot just a little snack or drink price but somthing that adds up a decent bit when done for a few days straight and u have like two ish weeks till then right? so u could make a decent dent with that plan

and hey i’m all for lying to parents but i think u shoukd consider the possibility that u may need to ask for help at one point even tho that’s so hard and ur mom will get all up in ur business but maybe it could help. or u could think of ur daily life like ur mom is there or nearby as a way to like watch urself and try to control what ur doing if that makes sense?

[onlyjaeyun]

hi my love!! i haven’t spoken in almost a week but i’ve been busy w uni + work + assignments 😭😭 but i have been keeping up w your page and ive been loving every update (and the timely updates w the written chaps!!)

hope you’re doing okay!! you staying up two night even when you’re tired and have stuff to do is so .. inspirational to be honest i truly love your dedication but i also want you to know it’s completely fine to step back and take breaks!! just want a happy and healthy zadie <3

ALSO RAW?? LIKE SUNGHOON HAS RHE PRIVILEGE NOW?? OH MY GODDDD i can’t wait to read the whole chapter tonight

i love u zadie baby, sleep well tonight <3

- 🍇

(also i find it so interesting that you can speak german and i live for it even tho i can’t understand.. LOL like we learn smth new everyday)

hello my sweetest angel 🥺 im so glad you found time to check in, and am sorry life's been so busy for you, hoping you'll get some rest soon and pls make sure to take care of yourself!!! youre trying your best and youre doing fucking amazing, im so proud of you!🥺💗

thank you so, so much for your kind words urgh you guys will never fail to make me go 💗🩷💕🩷💗 bc of how sweet and genuine you are 🥺💗

im glad you enjoyed the last chap and hope you'll enjoy the future ones too, sending you the biggest kiss rn 🥺💗🫧

(bdkdndld thank you baby!!!! german's literally part of my personality atp so im super excited to know you find it interesting 🥺💗)

[chiefwritesbook]

Writeblr Q&A

I have been tagged by @scifimagpie (ty for tag) so I shall attempt to answer these questions lezzgo

1. What motivates you to write?

The soup brain has too many thoughts & I have to get them out. Also spite because my asshole 8th grade English teacher said my writing assignment was only worth a C (he was the ONLY one btw I got consistently vv high grades before him) & my Chinese immigrant friend got marked down for not being good at English. Fuck you Mr English teacher

2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

(idk have this one from early chapter 2 I guess)

“You mean to say that I was bait,” Talin said.

“Not the word I would use, but in a way, yes,” Red Wolf confessed.

“Why?”

“You have been on the throne for less than a year. If someone wants you dead this quickly, something is amiss. I’d like to find out what.”

3. Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

My boy Red Wolf. He's just...yes. Autistic werewolf puppy. Could definitely kill me without hesitation or talk me to death with weapons knowledge. I would thank him if he punched me.

4. What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

I like not writing.

5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

Worldbuilding, no doubt. I am simultaneously the best and worst at worldbuilding. You want a 2000-word essay on how languages & regional dialects evolved over time? I gotchu covered no problem. Want me to stop elaborating on how Hellhound magic is linked to the moon & actually write my sequels? Absolutely not.

6. What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

I think the writeblr community is chill. Like y'all are just here for a good time and I can 100% respect that & get behind it. I get to write unhinged answers to these questions & not feel bad about it bc I don't have to self-impose ridiculous societal concepts such as 'maintain a professional image on social media'.

7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

Scrivener? Am I allowed to say Scrivener even though I use at most like 2% of their features. I am the kind of person who if given nothing but a notes app & a two-hour uni class to sit through will hammer out a full chapter in those two hours instead of paying any attention to class. On the other hand if you want me to actually write during my free time I'm sorry I'm too busy procrastinating writing with art & procrastinating art with gaming.

8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

This is not a wise question to ask me (see: question 5) unless the goal was to make me sit here for ten minutes typing out an entire essay's worth of worldbuilding word vomit, in which case well played. However for the sake of my own free time & sanity:

The legal system in Kies Tor is probably the single greatest thing I've ever constructed & it plays a crucial part in the plot & was built off the early British/European court system as well as my own special interests in law & criminology. In short it's trying its best but it's also deeply fucked up and I love making the fucked up parts fuck up my characters.

9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

Don't feel pressured to write. If you're staring at the same thing for weeks/months on end of course it's gonna get stale. Heck this Q&A post is the most I've written in weeks.

10. Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters:

@witch-king-of-angstmar ofc (no pressure to answer tho) but other than that I never know who to tag. I have social anxiety what is an interacting. If you see this on your dash consider yourself tagged

[pastelsicheng]

OMG FINISHED COLLEGE ? what degree if u wont mind ?! yeah, i heard applying for a job after school is hard from another friend of mine :(. NEVERTHELESS! lmk if you got the job or not to congratulate or say f u to the company who denied the amazing emmy 😾. and its ok if you reply late! i dont mind :] but omg i went through hell and back this past 2-3 years. i got a bf! and graduated hs! im a second year now! and my first sem what taking a toll on me ( like badly, i was like crying every night and refused to ask help bc yeah) which made me had a messy breakup with my bf well ex causing multiple messy friendship breakups.. LOL BUT ANYWAYSS no more depressing stuff, a month ago or so, I WENT TO JAPAN AND KOREA!! i already miss it! i also got my drivers license!! i was deathly terrified of driving earlier in the year 😭. and I GOT TO SEE NCT DREAM! no renjun rip but its okay. i dont really keep up with them anymore but theyre like my most favorite still! i think thats about it? WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO? imyvm （╹◡╹）♡ -nini

I graduated uni almost 2 years ago (I did business) and then I immediately started college for baking & pastry arts lol so that’s the one I just finished. I actually finally got a job!! I start next week. Unfortunately no baking job (everyone that interviewed me ended up ghosting me 🙃) but the corporate job pays better and has much better benefits so there’s that at least. It’s a contract job tho so not permanent WHICH SUCKS but it’s the best I could get for now bc every other corporate place has given me rejections 😭😭

omg u really did go through so much wowowowowow. so sorry u had a terrible first semester :(( i hope youre doing much better now and have adjusted. i know the transition to uni from high school was tough for me too. and then covid hit before i could even finish first year 💀. like me and my friends say, all these experiences are just helping with character development. and its all those people's loss for ending their friendship with you. friends dont have to be your therapists but a good friend never leaves you when ur at your worst (unless of course ur a horrible person, but you are so obviously not). you'll find better people to keep as close friends <33

getting to go to japan and korea AND see NCT dream??? lol u definitely made up the bad experiences with even better ones. thats so fun!!! how long did u stay for? did u see dream in concert in korea or america? i also havent kept up with them, probably since mark came back actually. i think my interest in kpop faded a couple years ago but i'll occasionally check up on the groups i listened to and see whats up. i also still get kpop posts on my tiktok and insta feed so i'm still being updated on everything against my will LOL

honestly my life has been pretttyyyy boring in comparison. its just been school and work for the past 6 (ish?) years. i think the most exciting thing to happen is i got a cat last year. shes a cute little menace. i'll send u pics in messages if u wanna see her hehe

other than all that, how is 2nd year going for u so far? is it midterm season for you too? also what are u majoring in! i hope things arent too stressful for u rn!! and that youre taking care of urself <3 i miss u lots too <33

[yiiiikesmish]

cw: me being very depressed and feeling very alone and i need to get these feelings out and i can't talk about it with my best friend bc either she'll try to fix it or she'll tell my other friend and it'll become a thing

ive got this awful feeling that in my group of 4 i am in fact the tag along. i mean my brain always said it but then i just figured it was my anxiety and the fact that this has happened way too many times before but i thought that maybe this time i am truly part of the group but now i feel like maybe i'm not? like i'm home for a week from uni and we're meeting up as a group but then i asked the one who's been on exchange in the uk for the last year if she wanted to catch up just us. originally she said yes and now she's like oh sorry i just realised i'm super busy so probably can't i'll see you at the group catch up tho!! and idk it was a bit of a gut punch. like yeah i'm sure she's super busy meeting up with everyone who she hasn't seen in a year and sure i saw her in europe in june but it was never just us and on top of it made me remember that we'd had plans right before she left and then she flaked at the last minute. idk maybe i'm just too in my head but i just wanted to hang out with her at home. even if it was just for a quick meal or smth.

so then after all this i went on a bit of a spiral bc it made me realise that every time i come home i'm always reaching out to others being like hey do you want to hang out? and very rarely is it the other way around even in the summer when everyone is home.

honestly it probably my fault i'm the one who went overseas and maybe i just didn't text people enough to be like yeah she's my friend.

[starjxsung]

Hello my lovely, lovely Star 💕 I am sorry for disappearing for like two weeks - I was working full time the past two weeks at my speech arts academy (done work for the summer now though!!!)

I'm so glad you're boss has been supportive!!! I hope you've been able to get some rest... work sounds so busy and tiring for you... HOW'S ATEEZ!??!?! I HOPE IT'S AMAZING AND EVERYTHING YOU COULD'VE DREAMED OFFF IM SO EXCITED FOR YOU AND ALL THE CONCERTS I HOPE YOU HAVE AN AMAZING TIMEEE rahhhh I hope you're doing SO GOOD 💖 pls tell me how ur doing I hope you've been taking care 🫶 Life Update: I'm so excited for Europe hehehe I fly out in two daysss ALSO I got my uni courses all figured out now after many days of stress :') As for south africa guy... okay so like we talked about being in something more comitted and stuff (he brought it up) and it was like a good healthy talk and he was super mature about it and bringing it up and making sure I feel comfy and stuff and letting me know like I shouldn't feel any pressure to say or do anything I don't want to and like we've been taking it "slow" cause I expressed uncertainty around it (for various reasons I won't get into) but I was willing to give it a try ... anyways so like we hung out this past weekend and everything was great we texted for the couple days after that but then like four days ago he just... stopped texting. And he hasn't read my messages either ;-; like I know he takes breaks from his phone/being online pretty regularly for like two days at a time so I didn't really worry too much at first tho I was kinda miffed cause I've told him before to let me know if he was gonna go mia but now it's been like four (five?) days and I'm like worried but also upset and like rethinking this whole thing and like idk I know he left for a trip yesterday so now he probably won't get back to be until he's back but why did he just stop texting like three days before his trip??? Like mid convo too... MAN IDK IM SO UPSET BUT ALSO WORRIED ABOUT HIM AHHH anyways, I love you always <3 thank you for being you Star 💖🫶💕 🌱

MY ANGELLLLLLL I hope work was good !!! I can’t believe it’s already done for the summer! Time’s really flying 😦

ATEEZ WAS AMAZINGGGGG my twin sister wasn’t able to make it but I did meet up w my older sister briefly for the LA show and she loved it !!!!!!! I stayed in merch line for 5 hours and I am sunburnt so badly my arms physically sting 😀 worth it for a Seonghwa jersey ofc

I CANT BELIEVE YOU’RE GOING TO EUROPEEEE OH MY GOD THAT’S SO EXCITINGGGG I can’t wait to hear all about it !!!! And I’m glad uni courses are all sorted! Figuring out uni courses is always so stressful I hated it so much in college lmao

Also :((( I get that people can have their reasons for ghosting like that but imo it is SO fucked that people do that after communicating about where the relationship stands. Is he looking for something committed? Or have you both agreed for just something more casual? My ex boyfriend did that after our second date and it felt terrible bc for like 2 days after we had sex he just….. disappeared. And then came back and said he was drinking and sorta off the grid and missing classes and stuff. But I think I cried for 2 days bc I just felt so used. People should just communicate !!! Why they’re ghosting !!!! Instead of leaving their partners to guess :( I’m so sorry he did that and I hope it’s just bc he’s busy or has a genuine excuse. But to leave you hanging like that is just so fucked up imo :(

Keep me posted what happens & I hope you have so much fun in EUROPE in the meanwhile!!!! Try not to stress about him during ur trip, he’s not worth wasting a good trip on if he isn’t a member of skz. I love you so so much !!!! Be safe my angel !! 👼🤞💓💕♥️💜💖💞

[bbina]

user bbina!! <3 i think tumblr deleted my ask while i was looking at my notifications so i’ll try to remember everything i typed out 😭😭😭 but omg congrats on graduating!! 🥳💘 & i hope you’ve been doing well friend <3 i haven’t been able to send anything lately bc uni has been owning my ass 😔 i read the recent update tho and imagine ghosting wonbin like omfg… could never be me i’d be replying to him like it’s my job 🫡 sooo excited about this smau tho & i love the seunghans girls gc!! i wanna be one of his girls fr 😔🙏

- 🐚

hello shell anon its been a while!! literally took years to answer my inbox lmfao but were here 😭 ive been doing well thank u for asking!!! and i hope u are too!!! also the reason why i went ghost cus the last weeks of uni are always HELL and but glad thats over lol

i havent thought about the new smau in a hot minute 😭 but i swear yall its still there!! the author is just busy atm LMFAO will get back to that shit prompto (no promises) and who tf would have the guts to ghost wb </3 maybe me cus im back together with a little certain fella that we all know.. (wonbin never stood a chance) HOPE UR LIKING THE NEW SQUAD WITH AUDIZ AND HANI !!

[castle-dominion]

7x5 meme is murder

the snappamatic episode liveblog

Ok so I have p much no time. I have a full time job now instead of part time plus school assignments to do. I'm just going thru the transcript while I have a free half hour instead of yk... doing my Menu Demographic assignment.

update: it's still several days later & I'm only now getting the chance to watch it, on my day off. Heck the only reason I'm able to watch it is bc even tho I had to go to two different schools today & my uncle usually comes over, mum & lil bro are gone & my uncle is not coming over so I can watch this in the evening. I... have less than two hours before I need to be asleep.

Music <3 I see nobody here. Lots of mirrors. Pretty gal. Love how we're getting only one side of the phone call. why is the number already blocked? it's her! She dead!

When I watch this I'm going to join in on the vocal warmups I swear (I did lol) my mom's shiny forehead Martha <3 I love her bouncing BTS stuff I love, hey do you remember-- no that was s8 when someone was filming the dead body in the theater place. Mo! (who even is mo?) (you know I named a character Miyawatam who goes sby the nickname mo) walks away from mom with "oh my god" face wait I need captions on lol & since I've pre-liveblogged this, I can watch while doing my mustard seeds!

Misleading. Ha on the downloa-d. Remember the bloopers? NF has to catch books over & over.

Good for castle! Minor blow to my ego! Ok becks but PLAYING yourself is different from BEING yourself. Ah the coffee clink! RC: It’s time I let technology wrap me in its warm, lucrative embrace. Me: Bro if it's warm ur battery is overheating transcript doesn't say how tall the building is (love castle & the unis)

SHE is a maintenance worker, good for her. nvm misread the transcript, maintenance FOUND her Esposito kinda pretty. Heehee so creepy. Julian & LT in the background <3 Ryan also pretty ig but meh RC: Well, so much for the warm embrace of technology. Why si it always a burner phone? I mean they are homicide detectvies so of course it is there... I just remembered how the killer got in. Anyway the dets get burner phones with more regularity than normal ppl. Did she get killed after hanging up on him & getting the text?

Ryan's eyes in this lighting Club Doom Small time celebrity sort of like how castle is a famous author but not easily recognizable. Wow 500k is a lot. My youtube only has 320 & mu tumblrs have way less. (btw carlos is kinda pretty) Oh maintenance celebrity was a comedian! Makes sense! not stalkers but u need followers

HOLD ON I KNOW AN EDWARD HAN IRL. he is NOT an acupuncturist, at least he wasn't in jr high... RC: And who better than an acupuncturist to kill with accurate punctures? Perhaps with a giant needle. JE, who is rly pretty: I don’t get it. Posting dumbass photos all over the place? How does she have a fan base? How did this become a career? Me: so right bestie *liveblogging on tumblr* RC: Welcome to the sharing economy. JE: More like oversharing. Me: & it's worse when they share info abt random people on the street or prank them. At least Just For Laughs gags points out the cameras in the end & asks permission. KB: Really? And you’re opposed to all photos of oversharing women? *eyes emoji* JE: o-o JE: That’s … different. (funny but not clipping) (ryan said that making eye contact to beckett & everyone but also that deep eye contact with esposito)

Yeah she messed up Han's business I'm mad at her Ooh info: Abby said someone had been following her for the last month. But I didn’t track her down until a week ago. So the stalker couldn’t have been me. I don't have proof, that's your job

What's up with the lighting btw? KB: “The brightest stars burn quickest.” Me: we spark & fade they die by threes ooh wood varnish Pulls up a chair for someone (castle ig) The guy filming-- no that was castle's book. Mixing in my mind with the one in the future. lol Netslayer??? totally would have a better pfp imo

Like the cheese that the guy posted online that happened to have his finger that had his fingerprint that got him arrested

Heck yeah privacy! Oren Wilder: Look, no one is more upset about this than we are. KB: I bet Abby Smith was. Yay 10minmail Snappamatic stays a thing in future episodes, being associated with murder is not going to ruin it. Like those tiktokers who found a body in a suitcase. Metadata my beloathed What if the netslayer had his idea for snappamatic stolen by these two? Why would netslayer not scrub the metadata? JE: We already did. It’s a one man shop owned by one Bill Garrett. It turns out he used to be a cop until he had a nervous breakdown. And get this – he worked in the cyber division.

Ew guns. no vests tho.

Lol screw you & your fellow officer bs. You are to be treated just like any other human being. Even when u delete them they can be recovered, yes he knows that he was in cyber. He can't have killed her bc he wouldn't mess up like that. Bill Garrett doesn't go near the web unless he has to? mr cyber division? Also brings up a question. When did the police need to make a cyber division? (& then why does he have wifi at his shop?) BG: And I quit cyber because a frat boy date raped a girl, posted the photos online, and then got away with it, so I flipped out and I put him in the hospital. Me: so valid bestie

Ooh it's them! they're being stalked! Taunted! Serial killers taunting cops are always fun in media. So why... why did the netslayer show off instead of letting them arrest him & he'd get away with it? Oh wait I remember. He wants attention. I lovebeckett's face at the body parts

RC: Human Sausages... (makes sense for a serial killer)... in november...... (not so much) Except that mr cyber might be able to change his security system to say he has an alibi their NEXT murder or a murder they've done which u haven't found yet? Speaking of which, did he post the pics before or after the body was found? Huh, nov 12 is World Pneumonia Day. KR, annoyed: Yes castle we're also looking into that

I don't like the animations. I'd expect Tory to do more alt-tab back & forth between the cropped photo & the normal photo. In fact, let her do it several times & maybe one of the dets says "stop i'mma get nauseous" Food blogs my beloathed

Ooh german cuisine Hey 47 followers in a week is good!!

Maybe these are personal, not for the web-celeb. Go back to your first suspicion.

KR: But Leek’s pretty low on the Snappamatic totem pole. He only has about two thousand followers. Heck, my blog has more than that. First of all, "heck" is a good word, second, Let Me See Ryan's Blog! Like how bbc made john watson's blog! RC: U have a blog? KR: Yeah, yeah. The Ryan Report. It’s the musings of a homicide detective? The ryan report <3. Ok so the transcript says becks knows what he's talking abt but does she? does she read it? does she just know about it? I'm glad castle isn't reading it tho bc he'd make so many comments & corrections. (& watching it I see becks also looks surprised when ryan says his blog has over 2k followers) (Actually watching it I see becks makes hand gestures as if she knows abt the blog, meaning she knew abt it but not that it was over 2k followers or she was faking.) KR: Well … that’s going to be difficult. He’s at an art opening in Seattle. He doesn’t live in New York. Ok & one more thing abt the ryan report: is being a homicide detective his only personality trait? (I mean in early seasons he started reading castle books & then ofc he's also a parent, & it's revealed he took piano lessons & he'd open a winery if he won the lottery, but still, his blog is about homicide?) Castle shaking his hands when he figures it out, adhd moments

RC: Expiration date on spoiled milk. Plus grilled bratwurst equals … spoiled brats. (they don’t really follow) That’s the message. That’s what the images mean, leading us to … (off their lost looks) Seriously? Anyone here besides me a consumer of vapid online magazines? ESPOSITO, RYAN, and BECKETT all chorus “no”. CASTLE deflates. (but the way they say it is so... chill & small, I love them. not worth clipping tho. btw I love how far forward beckett's head is when listening & then she brings it back to normal good posture when she shakes her head. But maybe I should clip. But maybe I shouldn't.) Ok but weren't there 3 photos? Yeah body parts I DID IN FACT NOTICE THAT THE ARTICLE'S PHOTO WAS THE COLLAGE

Ok I should put this on hold *after eating second breakfast* Maybe I can just liveblog a little more...

Becks maybe she doesn't know abt the netslayer yet, it's been less than a day. Could have said "we have reason to believe that you are the target of an upcoming homicide" So she knows abt the netslayer obv, but abby had up to half the followers you did, which is a lot. (also, ryan's blog has 2k followers!?!? that is plenty!) she's awful. doesn't deserve to die but wow. Yeah it's hard when you go from mademoiselle to madam or miss to maam or senorita to senora. (but esposito's eyes when she said that lol) Bye bye! *man's dead*

hhh pushzoom So when did the netslayer kill cam if the cops were right there?

I always thought it was weird how they just have a tv up in the corner but they used it for the baby lottery & they don't just idk. tv is weird. she can pause it? remember the dead pool? the guy was a car thief? Or ambidextrous

Ok so the timing of it is an issue. It looks like they are still chill, but this was before they got on the scene.

First name

Hug <3 This is so early 2010s or whenever this show came out. Love anonymity. The cops just bought a 3d printer? I'd expect the guy to maybe use one at the library. Ryan looks so sweet. I love him look at that. Ok but u need to have it the right size. & orientation. The key is twisted to the wrong size. But ryan is sooo smart look at him! look at what he did! (also that key is possibly a 1284x) Castle uses the word outstanding now! (the killer didn't snap a pic, the vic posted a pic) mr rich castle man XD (beckett's voice this ep sounds like she grew up with a british or other european accent & is working to not have that accent but it is not rly working.)

Yeah u don't drive ur can in new york, it's for getting out of the city.

JE: So I’ve been running the people that rented Abby’s apartment. KB: Why would anyone let complete strangers stay in their place? TE: Extra money. KB & JE: TE: (sheepishly) After this I don’t think I’ll be doing it anymore. (yeah she's an underpaid "lowly tech worker" I don't think even a real cop. I have a friend who does work like that, or at least did, idk what happened after june 2020) So this guy has been planning this since Abby rented out her apartment. Carlos said she USED to rent out her place, now she doesn't.

Bill garrett, welcome back! Is it a fake beard or did he grow up & grow a beard?

Myspace XD Except I have a question, would he, if he's been this traumatized, not be super aware of where all the cameras are now? ig not Computer geek? My man has computer friends then.

how does he get paid then? Oh wait online stuff. that's how he paid for the 3d print job. JE: Hey, get this. I ran down Tim Witherspoon, Lane’s bully. Turns out, he’s dead. Unsolved homicide. He was stabbed in his apartment ten months ago. !!! RC: That’s right after Lane’s mother died. Maybe that’s what triggered him. He might still have the key, like when james gillies went to his childhood home & kidnapped someone

wow guns

her phone is in the velcro on her jacket?

Oren and Kent Wilder from Snappamatic, oh no. (they got kidnapped WHILE working with tthe police!?) This is hilarious, I read a fanfiction like this once. It was very typical fanfiction tho, I can't take this seriously.

It's like gofundme, a popularity contest where if you lose you die bc you can't afford ur medical bills. Becks is right, they both might. I mean, maybe if nobody voted nothing would happen. Hey here's a question: how are the votes connected to the machines? What if instead of finding the room, they stop the timer & the votes? Yeah sure u can track down snappamatic office photos OR you can find out where/when/how they were snatched & figure things out that way. (bro they can't even track the photos, remember?)

Adam Lane: What’s the expression? Three hots and a cot? (shrugs) Works for me. They probs can't send him there AL: It can’t be any worse than high school. he's .. maybe not that wrong? girl u'r not going down with manson & the zodiac. AL: I’m sick? (scoffs) Nobody had to follow me. No one has to vote for Kent or Oren. But they can’t help themselves. They want to be a part of it. They have to watch. So … who is really sick? He's not too far off there actually

I thought that garret would go in & talk to him

Ryan doing tech stuff, esposito walking around canvassing Well if the site crashed, nobody can vote so that's good. Maybe it disabled the timer & now they won't die. What if oren & kent just,, already died bc the system boot killed them? bc it is after all connected to the site & the votes...

AL: If you cops were capable of doing your jobs you’d know. there was a hint. He did spoiled brats... he left a hint somewhere else. & I think I remembered how it ends. {hs, right?} ew fakes electrocution, surprised me Becks u need to make it believable. Send Garrrett in. Or u can bully him becks. that... ok. He didn't exactly say they were to/g. *using description* tiled walls & stale air. Why so much description my man? BOTH fry wait, he also said the votes were irrelevant.

*jumps over the thing* Bro what if you just peel off the stickers? (except with only this many seconds left u might not want to touch the things) The countdown ends and an electrical box beeps. ESPOSITO reaches over and grabs a fistful of the wires and pulls them out. The wires spark, but they’re safe. Like castle & the bomb! for a sec I thought esposito went to hug him lol, but it was the duck tape on his mouth

I love seeing the whiteboard with the writing but no pics, it;s cool

The way he swings his arms

YAY THE RAGIN HEAT WEBMERCIAL I AM SO GLAD THIS IS ONLINE I'M NOT CLIPPING BC I CAN JUST LINK IT BUT HECKING CROWS I'M HAPPY.

Transcript: Hi, I’m Crichard Rastle Captions: Crichard Ratchel Me: so did he mess up saying his own name or was it youtube pooped together? I;M SO HAPPY THIS WAS DUMB & PPL DIDN'T ENJOY IT BUT I DID & I SING IT TO MYSELF ALL THE TIME. his face doing the boomerang thing RC: (horrified) A million people have seen that?

Great ending btw with just the "hi"

sdklsjdfljksj so that was fun. Can't wait for the bloopers I'll show you some good.

[abcdosaka]

i have not posted on here in a while. idk various things have happened. but heres the most recent stuff.

this is sorta fresh (literally 2 days ago) but im mostly over it i think? i made a hinge account and briefly talked to this girl and i liked talking to her but i think i just dont know how to rizz someone up, or maybe ik and i dont have the courage to do it so i gotta play nice girl from the start. and i think our second phone call i was just kinda lacking in energy and i wasn’t texting her too often either. but at the end of it she was like lets just be friends going forward.

i havent really had any experiences before, like real ones where i was the one initiating everything, so it hurt, kinda like getting rejected for a job interview. i was like ig im just not outgoing or funny or charming enough but damn we talked like twice on the phone, we never even met up, that quick huh.

tbh i think i initiated slightly more and she was less interested and she also made it pretty clear she wasnt sure about getting into a relationship. idk its not worth analyzing. we do have a lot of similar tastes but if she wants to be friends she has to initiate and i might blow her off anyway i dont feel like talking to her anymore lol. or maybe ill respond but just really slowly. ik its giving nice guy/friendzoned. ehhh i might respond she was nice/friendly enough i just need time to get over it fully. i think this is a lets see how im feeling in a week situation. to be fair sometimes good friendships pop up out of bad experiences for me like i thought D was a huge dick when i first met him but we got along well for the time we knew each other

idk i would rather have someone who knows what they want and is certain about it too. but in the first place i dont even want to talk to ppl like its such a hassle texting randoms multiple days in a row. i got a couple other likes and i just ignored them. ive ghosted two ppl bc i just was sick of the texting going nowhere.

tbh i think im just sad bc my ego’s a little bruised. but idk that happens to me easily like applying for a job sucks and it hurts to get rejected and having a job kinda sucks too but its required. relationships, kinda the same but i dont think its required? they never seemed that great or fun or loving to me, prob bc my parents hated each other for 90% of my childhood. even when i see relationships in fiction im like oh cute but idk if i really need that.

im more upset that i dont really have anyone to talk to about this stuff. and im upset s didnt wanna meet over reading week. like besties for 10 years but you couldnt free up a space for me even tho i asked like 3 weeks ago. idk if i can even call us besties. i used to be so insecure abt what kinda friendship we had but now im kinda sick of this. maybe i should ask. i kinda hate feeling needy or sounding clingy though. idk i was pretty friendly in my response

she didnt even receive it T_T

idk she hasnt responded to any messages frequently for the past month so shes probably really busy but ugh i fucking hate this. i just wish she’d check in for once like “hey sorry ive just been really busy the past month and havent had the energy or time to respond but hopefully ill have some time soon”. cuz the thing is its kinda typical of her to flake/be distant/antisocial. like after we graduated hs she ignored my messages for a month and she promised not to do that again. and when we hung out for the last time before i moved for uni she overslept and i think shes done that two or three times since. its really frustrating when we dont get to see each other than often. so if i ask her its gonna be like this is an isolated incident but its not and im prob not gonna see her again after i graduate uni bc i wanna move across the country. and we almost never call bc everytime i ask she doesnt want to. i think thats just her hating calling but how tf else are we supposed to stay in contact when we live in different cities??? and texting for hours on end is fking annoying? same difference ik a bit hypocritical there but also, calling means u can multitask but texting means u have to focus solely on texting unless you wanna respond every 2 hours or even worse, every 5 minutes, theres no flow unless you pay full attention to texting.

and the thing that sucks even harder. is that we had a mutual friend, j, who was her BESTIE for middle school and almost all of highschool. (i had a crush on this chick btw but never told her and i kinda stopped talking to her in senior year). and j did the same fucking thing like she decided she didnt wanna talk to people she knew before highschool anymore and basically just slowly cut s out of her life. and s was so upset abt it she told me abt it a lot

see the thing is if i do confront her about ALL of this, i  think its gonna go the worst way possible. like we will slowly drift apart and im gonna lose my closest friend who probably doesnt even consider me at least one of her closest friends. and then im fucked. i mean im not fucked but im starting from ground zero.its really hard not having someone you know you can rely on. altho maybe shes not the most reliable and ive been coping by pretending im independent and dont need anyone for emotional shit. maybe im just catastrophizing. like on one hand, i truly am unsure enough abt our friendship that idk if she’d make an effort after i move real far. but on the other hand i am a known pessimist and i suck at this people bullshit. so idk if i should ask or not.

ugh i shouldnt have wrote this. i was like “if i go in depth on this post i wont be able to stop and then im gonna cry and i dont wanna cry. i should try to keep it light.” like lol. at least it was good practice for typeracer. im gonna do one race and go to sleep. this is frustrating

[rrxnjun]

YESSSS thats what everybody has been saying about uni and it's just makes me so nervous cuz if i do not have like clear instructions and things on how to do things i just crumble so i'm really scared about it🥲🥲🥲 i don't think im that smart tbh but thank u for thinking that🤣 and i feel like u have to be smart as well tho to learn psychology!!! like psychology sounds so much harder/smarter to me than international businesses

getting mad at ur art is just so😭😭but very relatable tbh i do the same thing with it as well ig🥲

SO TRUE WALKING IS JUST SO AMAZING!!! i'm an avid walk enjoyer and i feel like most people just under appreciate it!!! like i have been going on daily walks for a while now and nobody gets why i love it so much🫡 (kinda funny how excited i am to talk about walking but i just love it somuchhhh🤣)

wahhh i'm so glad it made u happy!!! 💕tbh i was just very scared that it's rude to ask this kind of question and i just didn't want to make u feel bad that u didn't post anything about it ;-; and i care so much about that fic like i'm not even kidding after i read it it was in the back of my head 24/7 for at least a week or something i loved it so much ngl 🥹🥹 like that was what i was looking for in books tbh🤣 and thank u for not thinking i'm not annoying;-; like this just made me feel so much better about sending these asks💕 AND I ALSO THANK U VERY MUCH FOR BEING KIND AS WELL!!!!💓💞💘💖 (liebestraum anon💕)

THATS SO ME i need instructions for eveRYTHING in life i cant possibly do things alone AHAHA. you are smart tho and i stand by this. i mean,, psych is hard so i do think i am quite intelligent tbh but thank you for saying so as well!! but we dont have to compare ourselves to others, there are many kinds of smart and while i am psych smart you are international businesses smart and neither is more than the other.

WALKS ROCK BRO its my fav hobby. i walk to and back from uni every day and it takes 30 mins to go there and sometimes i have to go there twice so im really getting those walks in. its so great u just put in your earphones and listen to your music and its so fun istg

why would it be rude!!!! i posted it for everyone to see so its totally okay for u to ask about it and its totally valid to ask questions abt something that interested you. it didnt make me feel bad, bc i know i dont owe anyone anything and i write for myself ahaha <3 but this did make me really happy and that it was something you were looking for hhh <3

also,, im once again really sorry for replying so late. life got hectic and my mental health wasnt doing really well hhh

[magickedhat]

me: has proven time and time again that it’s nearly impossible for me to finish things, to complete projects, to carry through with my creative goals, to tell a story from start to finish

also me: goddamn why is it taking me so long to write wren’s story