#it’s bc he’s the only non misogynist in this house i know that’s why

[thewingedwolf]

exhausted by people saying cory has a big ego, like 70% of these house guests have a big ego that’s what you need to win this damn game. why are people so mad at Him specifically?!

[queenaryastark]

So you think you find a post with accurate commentary:

Yes, this is true. Exactly zero members of House Martell and zero Dornish characters have any animosity toward House Targaryen. They rightly blame Tywin and Gregor Clegane for what happened to Elia. They also avidly support Targaryen Restoration, eagerly trying to marry Arianne to Viserys and then trying to marry Quentyn to Dany. They even speak positively of Rhaegar, who did not abuse nor abandon Elia. House Martell are among the Targ loyalists in Westeros.

Sadly they didn't stop there.

In short, this person, like the rest of the fanon crowd, did not read any of the chapters Aegon is featured in. They also don't seem to have read the books in general since we know that Rhaegar was anything but indifferent and scornful toward his son who he believed was a hero out of prophecy and gave him a king's name since he saw Aegon as the future king. Plus, anyone who has actually read Tyrion and JonCon's ADWD chapters where Aegon appears will know that Aegon is 100000000000% in as a Targaryen.

Aegon claims Rhaegar as his father by name and mentions Elia (not by name) in passing as part of his own supposed backstory. Aegon even asks for info about Rhaegar, but not about Elia.

He's also all in for the Targcest as he wants to marry Aunty Dany.

He refers to himself as a dragon and hopes to ride one.

He's also misogynistic toward women in power, which is very unDornish of him, but a reflection of non-Dornish Westerosi values.

Tyrion considers Aegon’s temperament as proof of his Targness. He also uses the lure of emulating Aegon I to manipulate the current Aegon into doing what he wants, which works bc Aegon is proud of his Targ heritage.

Seriously though...

Aegon mentioning Elia:

“That was not me. I told you. That was some tanner’s son from Pisswater Bend whose mother died birthing him. His father sold him to Lord Varys for a jug of Arbor gold. He had other sons but had never tasted Arbor gold. Varys gave the Pisswater boy to my lady mother and carried me away.” -- Tyion VI, ADWD

Aegon mentioning Rhaegar:

“Your father knew the dangers of being overbold.”

“Did you know my true father?”

“Well, I saw him twice or thrice, but I was only ten when Robert killed him, and mine own sire had me hidden underneath a rock. No, I cannot claim I knew Prince Rhaegar. Not as your false father did. Lord Connington was the prince’s dearest friend, was he not?”

Young Griff pushed a lock of blue hair out of his eyes. “They were squires together at King’s Landing.” -- Tyrion VI, ADWD

----

And then Prince Aegon spoke. “Then put your hopes on me,” he said. “Daenerys is Prince Rhaegar’s sister, but I am Rhaegar’s son. I am the only dragon that you need.” -- The Lost Lord, ADWD

The difference in how he talks about his parents couldn't be more different. This makes sense because he was raised by Rhaegar-loving and Elia-hating JonCon. Had Aegon been real and raised by the Martells, he likely would have cared about both of his parents and felt connected to both Houses he's descended from.

As someone who wastes a considerable amount of time on the content Aegon is featured in, I have to wonder why these people fixate on him. It reminds me of how Stansas use Jon while knowing exactly nothing about Jon Snow. They take the somewhat outward trappings of the character -- able bodied king candidate -- and project inaccurate ideas onto him. They should hate Jon bc he is sexist against women like their fav and has more sympathy for the grown man who married her than he does for his 12-year-old sister. Similarly, fanon!Elia stans should take issue with the fact that Aegon focuses considerably more on his father and being a Targ than he does on his "mother" who supposedly worked to save his life. As an actual Elia fan, I know I consider Aegon's apathy toward his "mother" to be a flaw of his.

[aelingalathyniusrailme]

I am so fucking sick of the “just say you hate elain and go” argument . Like I know I shouldn’t let it get to me but whenever I see people comment that on legit thought out theories it makes me so angry - like e/riel want absolutely no growth or character development for elain outside her relationship with az... yet for some reason we are the misogynistic ones??? These people have wrapped their whole personality up in this one single ship and it’s exhausting to witness like aren’t they tired???

(this got really long and went in a completely different direction but I think it’s kind of entertaining so)

i’m with you babe. elriel, putting it nicely, sucks. elriel stans are a whole other level of awful. i’m pretty sure they are some of the most hypocritical people I have ever come across and that’s saying something.

im gonna say there is not one theory about elain, from them ofc, that doesn’t involve azriel. I mean anyone with half a brain can see how these two would destroy each other.

basically their relationship would go:

get together, sex and honeymoon phase,

wedding

oh what’s that uh oh looks like trouble in paradise, elain suffocating, azriel’s self hatred sky rocketing

resentment.

lucien and gwyn are laughing from the sideline, look at these two idiots and what they could of had instead they’re miserable.

but because azriel thinks he should be happy and elain has no balls they’ll stay together until ultimately the ic has an intervention. but bc they are stubborn as fuck they will convince the ic they are fine.

then elain goes out because she has to get away from azriel. where does she find herself. a bar. who else is at said bar. lucien. it takes elain 3 shots before she goes up to him. he’s also a little tipsy but no where near as bad as she is. he’s a little hesitant of her but they end up having an amazing night and elain is smiling for the first time in like years.

she finds herself going out more and more. and she and lucien are hanging out all the time now. it’s been a few months and elains like shit he’s hot.

boom. hook up and some hot ex mate sex.

it’s the next morning elains like shit shouldn’t have done that, but then why did it feel so good

now on azriels side it doesn’t even occur to him that something could be going on with elain. he feels so much more relaxed now that she’s gone so often.

azriels at the house of wind hanging with nesta and cassian. feyre winnows in and azriel feels a strange pull and who does he see?!?

holy shit it’s gwyn. he hasn’t seen her in years and she looks absolutely radiant.

she’s been gone training females to become valkyries. her eyes are clearer and she has her broad smile but it seems easier.

their gazes lock and azriel feels a bolt of electricity go through him. he ignores it like an idiot and goes home

he and elain had another fight, he’s pissed and needs to work off his anger.

azriel goes to train at the house of wind and who does he see. that’s right gwyn. she’s like we have got to stop meeting like this. and for the first time in years azriel smiles.

gwyn would never admit it but when azriel and elain got married she felt this sudden urge to leave. she didn’t know why but she followed it and it took her all over the pyrithian, the other countries even the human lands.

but now she’s back and only plans to stay for a month. uh oh. rom-com much

suddenly they are having a conversation, azriel points out the constellations and they end up lying next to each other looking at the stars. you guessed it they fell asleep.

cough and woke up cuddling cough

but bestie vibes only right 😏

over the next month they are hanging with each other non stop. for the first time in so long azriel is having fun and looking forward to the next day.

but not tomorrow because gwyn is leaving. oh shit. what will happen to our favorite pyrithian love square

the day before gwyn leaves elain and az both say to each other “i’ve got something to tell you” but elain goes first and she says “I want a divorce” and azriel is stunned but she’s not done “i’m sorry but i’m in love with lucien” azriel expects to feel jealous but instead he feels light and he goes “i’m in love with gwyn”

oh my goodness gracious. and they both smile because they want the other to be happy. and so az says go get your read head and elain says go get yours.

love confessions. mating bonds. happiness everywhere. and yes hot fucking sex

they both end up with their respective redheads and all is right in the world. the end.

gwynriel and elucien are inevitable and elriel is just an obstacle in the way.

[bbyx]

in your dreams - part one

Summary: Remus Lupin is head over heels for Narcissa, but she’s not allowed to date until her sister (y/n) has a boyfriend. As a solution, Remus enlists Sirius to become (y/n)’s boyfriend.                                                                        Pairings: reader x sirius, remus x narcissa, lucius x narcissa, james x lily Disclaimer: This is basically harry potter universe x 10 things i hate about you. You DON’T need to have seen the movie to understand bc this is basically a retelling of the story. Also some of the dialogue has been taken straight from the movie. ALSO in this story Narcissa and Bellatrix are NOT Sirius’s cousins.

Hogwarts. It was beautiful, breathtaking even from the train window. The great castle looms into view, and (y/n) Knightley gets slightly tearful at the fact that this is the beginning of her last year at Hogwarts. A year from now you would hopefully begin your training as a healer at St.Mungos. That is if your father didn’t marry you off before that. 

Your thoughts are abruptly interrupted by the compartment door sliding open. A group of giggling girls pop their heads in, blasting a horrendously high pitched song from a portable cassette player.

“Hi we’re the Promenade ball committee! Make sure to buy a ticket. It’ll be a night to remember!” One of them says in a sugar sweet voice, handing you a purple flyer. You simply roll your eyes as an answer and the girls leave, mumbling to themselves. You manage to hear a what a bitch through the high pitched singing. You glance down at the paper. It reads:

Promenade ball! Hogwarts class of 1978

May 22nd - 8:00 to 12:00

Tickets : 10 galleons each

You scrunch the paper into a ball and throw it out the open window. 

Balls were stupid anyways.

Remus walked into Professor Myriads office, the head of Gryffindor house. He’s missed Hogwarts. Spending one year abroad at Ilvermorny was a great experience but it couldn't compete with the beauty of Hogwarts. In one year, so much had changed yet it still felt the same way it had in his first year. Strange but familiar.

“Remus Lupin. Welcome back! I hope you enjoyed your stay in America. Now I know you remember this school like the back of your hand but it is a Hogwarts rule that any returning students must be shown around the premises again. I’ve assigned Peter Pettigrew to be your guide for today.” She says motioning to Peter standing outside, waving excitedly. “You may go to class now.” The silver haired woman said, dismissing him quickly. Remus reached down for his bookbag when a shadow stood leaning in the doorway. 

“Padfoot!”

“Moony! Missed you mate.” Sirius and Remus embraced each other tightly, Professor Myriad cleared her throat. 

“Sirius Black. I see we're making our visits a weekly ritual. You better not get in trouble this year if you want to graduate.” She gave him a disapproving glance. He answered with a charming smile.

“Only so we can have these moments together. Should I, uh, get the lights?”

“Oh very clever Mr. Black. That’ll be ten points from Gryffindor.”

“Remus! Oh we’ve missed you so much. Tell me how it was. How were the states? Good god, so many things have changed in the past year.” Peter said, spitting out more questions than Remus could handle.

“It was nice, Ilvermorny was very laid back. They study native magic and lots of non verbal spells. I’ll tell you more at dinner.”

“Allright, let me give you the breakdown, even though you know most of this stuff.” Peter said.

They begin to walk around the grounds.

“Over there you’ve still got your basic beautiful people.” He motions to a group of students sitting under a tree. “To the left we have the coffee kids. A new developpement since Dippet allowed a coffee machine in the Great Hall.”

“Interesting.” Remus said, looking at the students who couldn’t seem to sit still.

One of them knocked over his cup, filled with rich brown liquid, onto the other’s lap. “Whoa”

“That was a Costa Rican, asshole!”

“Very edgy.  Don’t make any sudden moves around them.” Peter added. 

They now approached a few students dressed in large hats and leather boots.

 “These guys…” Peter started.

“Wait wait.  Let me guess.  Cowboys?”

“Yeah, ever since that muggle movie Grayeagle came out.”

“Who would have thought that I would see more cowboys back at Hogwarts than the US.”

They now neared a group of students sitting on the grass, scribbling on parchment furiously.                

“These are your future Ministers. Hey guys.  How ya doin’?” Peter waved to the group. They rolled their eyes at him and went back to they’re books.

“Yesterday I was their god.” Peter said wistfully.

Remus chuckled, he had missed this atmosphere. “What happened.”

“Bogie Levenstein started a rumor that I...that I used an enchanted quill on my OWL’s.”

“Did you?” Remus asked, already knowing the answer.

“Not the point.” Muttered Peter.

“So they kicked you out?” Remus continued.

“Hostile takeover.  But don’t worry.  They’ll pay.  Now over here…”

“Merlin’s sake.” Remus whispered as a beautiful, creamy skinned dark haired girl walked by.

 “What group is she in?”

“The “don’t even think about it” group. That’s Narcissa Knightley.  Fifth year.” Peter said, shaking his head at his friend. Remus' mouth was still agape as she walked past him with her friend.

“Yup, see, there’s a difference between “like” and “love”.  Because I like my wand, but I love my Snakeskin backpack.” Narcissa explained to the other girl.

“But I love my wand.” Her friend says clutching her wand to her chest.

“That’s because you don’t have a snakeskin backpack.” Narcissa said, like it was the most obvious thing. Her friend looks enamoured by her wisdom.

“Oohhh.”

“Listen. Forget her.  Incredibly uptight father, and it’s a widely known fact that the Knightley sisters aren’t allowed to date.” Peter said, shaking his Remus's shoulder.

“Uh huh...yeah.”

At dinner later that night, Remus couldn’t keep his gaze off the enchanting girl at the Slytherin table.

“Earth to Moony!” James said between mouthfuls.

“Mate, we haven’t seen you in months. Talk. Or would you rather go join the Slytherins.” Sirius says, glaring at the green robed students.

“He has a thing for Narcissa Knightley.” Remus gave Peter a death glare.

“She’s pretty, but not as pretty as Lily Evans.” James sighed, looking at the auburn haired girl.

“Prongs, you're still running after her? It’s been, what, three years of her constantly rejecting you.” Remus chuckled.

“At least Lily’s allowed to date.” James retorted.

“You guys are pathetic.” Sirius said, grinning cockily, knowing he could get any girl at Hogwarts easily.

“Okay then.  What did everyone think of the Tales of the Wizard-Goblin war?” Professor Binns, Hogwarts only ghost professor, asked.

“I loved it. The part with Ginnamora was soooo romantic.” A clueless girl sighed.

“Romantic?  Buckthorn?!  He was an abusive alcoholic misogynist who squandered half his life hanging around Giraf Abbott trying to nail his leftovers.” (y/n) said to the girl, earning eyerolls from the other students. 

Lucius Malfoy chuckles cockily. “As opposed to a bitter self-righteous hag who has no friends?”

Giggles erupt through the room. (y/n) doesn’t turn around to face him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’d pissed her off.

“I guess in this society being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time.”

Just then, a dark haired boy strolls confidently inside the classroom.

“What’d I miss?” Sirius asked.

“The oppressive patriarchal values that dictate our education.” You answered, gritting your teeth furiously.

“Good.” He turned around and went back out of the room.

“Hey, hey!” The ghost professor looked like he was about to go after him but decided to stay put.

“Uh,Professor.  Is there any chance we could get (y/n) to take her calming drought before she comes to class?” Lucius said, high fiving his fellow slytherins.

“Mr.Malfoy, someday you’re gonna get hexed and I’m not gonna do a thing to stop it.  And Miss. Knightley.  I want to thank you for your point of view.” Professor Binns stated. (y/n) smiled to herself.

Take that Malfoy.

“I know how difficult it must be for you to overcome all those years of pureblood oppression.  It must be tough.” Professor Binns' words wiped the grin right off her face. (y/n) thanks Merlin that Lucius Malfoy, with his inflated ego, couldn’t see her face. Professor Binns continues.

“But the next time you storm around the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures crusading for better house elves, or whatever it is you wealthy purebloods complain about, ask them why they can’t buy a book written by a ghost!”

 His normally monotone voice was now strident. Never in your six years at Hogwarts had you ever heard Professor Binns get so riled up. The whole class was taken about by his sudden burst of emotion. You quickly recover from your slight shock.

“Anything else?”

“Ten points from Gryffindor.  Go to your head of house.” Professor Binns stated, sounding a little brittle.

“What?!  Professor Binns!” You plead but he’s already started scribbling on the chalkboard. (y/n) storms out, making sure to hit Lucius Malfoy with her bag on the way.

Professor Myriad was scribbling a letter when you reached her office, knocking on the doorway to make your presence known. The silver haired woman lowered her glasses as you sat down in a crimson chair.

“So I hear you were terrorizing Professor Binns‘s class.  Again.”

“With all due respect expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action.” You say, picking at your nails.

“The way you expressed your opinion to Richard Crabbe? By the way, his testicle retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested.” She remarqued, mentioning a particularly nasty quidditch fight between (y/n) and that idiot Crabbe.

“I still maintain that his broom malfunctioned and he kicked himself in the balls.” You answer cooly, trying your hardest not to let any emotion seep through your face.

Professor Myriad fumbled. “The point is (y/n)...People perceive you as somewhat …” 

“Tempestuous?”

“"Heinous bitch" is the term used most often.” She states simply.

How flattering, Professor.

“You might want to work on that. Try being more like your sister.” 

You raised your eyebrows at her comment because the woman clearly had no idea what she was getting into.

“Tell me Professor, which sister are we talking about? Bellatrix? Who was married off to some greasy pureblood the day after she graduated. Andromeda? Who followed her heart but was shunned from the family. Or Narcissa? Who at sixteen still, for the love of god, cannot tie her shoelaces.” 

(y/n) rises from her chair and says, in her most sarcastic tone  “As always, thank you for your excellent guidance.” before strolling out of the tiny office.

Lucius and his friends were sprawled in their usual spots under a tree. Someone in the group mumbles “Virgin alert” as Narcissa and Josie walk past. Lucius’s attention is immediately fixed on the innocent looking brunette. The girls notice him and wave shyly.

“Looking good ladies.”

“They’re outta reach, even for you.” Simon Nott  said in a sing-song voice.

“No one’s out of reach for me.” Lucius says, sizing his friend up.

“You wanna put money on that?” Simon questions, leaning back against the tree. Lucius glances at Narcissa who’s laughing with a group of fifth year students,

“Money I’ve got.  This I’m going to do for fun.”

From across the courtyard, Remus, James and Peter observe the way Lucius Malfoy is eyeing Narcissa, like a tiger watching his prey. Remus feels strangely protective of her, wanting to protect her from Lucius’s slimy paws. He gazed at her as she giggled, her dimples showing.

“Mate, look at her.” He said in a voice soft with affection.

James is clearly unimpressed. “Is she always so...vapid?”

“How can you say that?  She’s totally…”

“Conceited?”Peter leered.

“What are you talking about Wormtail?  There’s more to her than you think. I mean, look... look at the way she smiles. And look at her eyes, man.  She’s totally pure.  I mean, you’re missing what’s there.”

“No, Moony.  No. What’s there is a snotty little Princess creating a strategically planned appearance to make guys like us realize we can never touch her, and guys like, uh…” Peter fumbled, looking across the courtyard. “...Lucis, realize they want to. She, my friend, is what we’ll spend the rest of our lives not having. Move on.”

“No.” Remus pouted stubbornly.

“Move on.” James quipped, repeating Peter’s words.

“No! You’re wrong about her.  You’re so wrong.” Remus grumbled back.

“Alright.  I’m wrong?  You wanna take a shot?  Be my guest. She’s actually looking for a Mermish tutor.”

Remus’s eyes light up. “Are you serious?  That’s perfect!”

“Do you even speak Mermish?” James questioned. Remus flashed his bright teeth.

“Well no.  But I will.”

[littleholyterrors]

ahh i don’t know horror super well and have only gotten into it ~relatively~ recently as a genre (i’m baby) but it seems like you know horror WELL!!! are there any more thoh movie parodies you’d wanna see?? also!! who do you think would ENJOY horror movies in springfield?? i like to think tim lovejoy does secretly have a side to him that likes “Non American-Christianity Sanctioned Fun”, maybe he had a whole collection of spooky movies hidden away that jessica accidentally found and then uses to torment other kids?? i feel like she’d definitely be the kind to teach kids swears so why not show them scary movies too lol

AHHH honestly i only got into horror a few years ago so i’m still very new to the game but i’m so glad to share what i know!!!

THOH parodies i’d die to see are jennifer’s body, re-animator, american psycho, beetlejuice, evil dead, trick r’ treat, black christmas, hereditary & midsommar (which my bf drew excellent art for), house of 1000 corpses (or any of the firefly trilogy movies tbh but obvs house of 1000 corpses is the most iconic), the cabinet of dr. caligari ... there’s definitely so much more i could think of but these are the big ones i’d die to see!!!

and OOO i love the idea that tim actually likes horror movies, i wouldn’t be opposed to the idea 👀 jessica inheriting her father’s taste by finding his movie stash and tormenting other kids with it would be amazing, like i could see her freaking rod & todd out with them. maybe tim likes horror movies bc they make him feel something, but idk what he’d think of movies that have a religious premise to them like the exorcist or the nun..... he could either love em or hate em

i’m p sure bart canonically likes horror (or at the very least, splatter films since the itchy & scratchy movie he watched w homer is essentially that), and i could also see nelson really liking that same grossout gory stuff. lisa might prefer more intelligent horror, like the recent wave of “elevated horror” that started in the 2010s with movies like the babadook and include movies like ari aster or robert eggers’ works. we HAVE seen her watch itchy & scratchy so i could see her appreciating campy slashers but ultimately being turned off by them bc of how women are objectified and tortured. slumber party massacre might be the exception though, considering it was written AS a critique on the slasher genre’s misogynistic tropes by women.

i ... really can’t think of anyone else who might like horror those are the only ideas that come to mind HFKDHFK obviously more ppl in springfield would appreciate the genre but these r my most fleshed out thoughts!!

[carpsurprise]

this isn’t really a request but if you want to do it anyway I think it’s fun:^) so we know sunshine boy sam is one of your favorites but can you rate the bachelors and bachelorettes together from most to least favorite and why?

thank u for sending this in!! its always refreshing to do non-imagine/writing stuff for da ol’ noggin!! dlkskd but truly thank u and im gonna put this under a cut and not tag it bc i can foresee there being some issues with this list <3 i do love all of these characters in their own way ofc

1. sam: like u said a given :^) i think sam is dumb and a lot of fun!! i love super happy/caring guys bc i am super bad w/ second guessing myself so!! a guy thats really straight forward and shows how they feel when they feel it is my dream! also the pop punk aesthetic <3 i like that he’s the direct opposite of me!! why would i want to date a dark/brooding guy when im already like that?? i want someone super happy thats gonna radiate that!!

2. haley: haley’s an angel late game! and she’s pretty! im pretty mean myself so i was never driven away from her but was more like damn we’d be powerful together and then she ended up doing a 180 personality wise and i love her even more!! shes so sweet and so helpful during marriage too love her

3. emily: ok emily is like a dream best friend for me!! i love how creative she is and we have a lot of similar interests. she seems like a good mix of the mom girl at a club taking care of all the drunk girls, the girl that u can easily go up to and talk to if u need a partner in class, and the cool older sister. love love love her

4. harvey: sweetheart... angel man. so shy and sweet!! i dont like mean men so him being outright kind and such a good guy is so heartwarming for me!! i feel like he would be respectful at all times and is not a man i’d need to worry about *intentionally* wronging me with intent to hurt <3 

5. elliott: i did theatre in high school and am a creative writing minor. i more wish i was him bc if i could live by the sea and write all day... yes. and speak like someone that would’ve gotten beaten up by a shakespeare character? yes. once again, a man that wouldn’t be mean to me & would make me feel safe

6. maru: also someone i would love as a friend! she’s so kind and always so welcoming my social anxiety would be nonexistent around her <3 i know she’d tell someone my order was wrong for me despite her also being nonconfrontational. seems like a sleepover queen and someone i could go to for anything without being judged love her to death 

7. penny: i also do love penny!! i think she’s def one of the better people in the game what with her aspirations and motivations but!! we r both too shy but i do love reading so i think we would get along there!! she’s v sweet but also her trope is not my fave!! i see a lot of similarities within us 

8. abigail: i do like abigail but i do not see the hype imo. she’s def got more character to her than some of the other women (once again, mr. ape) but she’s just not my type of girl !! i think we’re.... too alike probably. same thing w/ my thing w/ himboish guys.. i try not to surround myself w/ ppl that remind me of myself very often. still lov her tho i promise

9. leah: i feel like leah couldve had more potential in game imo, i dont really think there’s that much to her (thanks mr. ape) but i KNOW she’d beat someone up for me and i love that for both of us. she seems sooo chill and nonjudgemental. she’d buy me food if i couldn’t pay for it at the time </3 i do love her a lot

10. alex: oh boy hot stupid boy but misogynistic comments. granted! high hearts he’s much better but its the getting past that. i like his character at high hearts (also its just funny to headcanon him reacting to other characters) but.. alex i lov u but jesus christ. wouldn’t feel safe around him early game but later on i kno he’d beat up another guy for me <3

11. sebastian: him pushing the farmer (me) away at any chance is a huge turn off for meeeee and i just dont like!! men that are rude. obvi higher hearts hes not anymore but if not for completion sake i wouldnt have gotten to know him. i dont really like edgy guys bc i feel like there’d be more gaslighting and instability. also pelican town only has room for one goth seb stay in the basement </3 sdlkslkd

12. shane: once again mean if i wanted a man to be mean to me i’d walk outside my house. i don’t even reallyyy like his high hearts character (esp w his drinking after marriage) i just lkdlsdk drinking is a big turn off for me (family issues) and i understand why he’s like this i just. it doesn’t excuse it. i’m not his mother i refuse to cater to him bc of his issues. we all have issues.. u cant just treat people bad bc of them!! 

[gayregis]

oh dandelion is such a weird case tbh. like all the sleazy shit he does is entirely unnecessary imo but people have latched onto the womanizing and all as such a huge important part of is character that no one seems to really question it? and in part due to mistranslations its treated by fans as a whole as way less harmful than it is? idk but honestly its part of why i just think hes gay now bc his canon sexuality is a mess nd basically every non-platonic interaction he has with a woman is gross

(this is part 2 ig? sorry shdjs) for example idk how it looks in the translations but in the original like. one of the very first things dandelion talks about is how he groped one of nenneke's students, and the bit with the brothel in eternal flame is. really awful when you look at it esp with the (horribly constructed but still) race dynamics in-universe, when he talks about "being able to afford a half-elf or maybe even a full-blooded elf" like idk its just. Bad and i think ppl gloss over it

(okay i started writing this part of the response before i got part 2): yes, it seems to me like a lot of him is based on this trope of the slovenly womanizer bastard-sort, but sapkowski does nothing to invert that part of the trope, lol. he disproved being a coward, because he was brave to follow geralt into brokilon/stand up for geralt’s life in dol blathanna/etc. he disproved being an idiot, because he makes intelligent observations sometimes. he disproves being selfish, because he is very caring for geralt and others. but he does nothing to disprove womanizing/misogyny, perhaps except for how he treats essi as his little sister, and for how he is appropriate with shani and also good to ciri. also i suppose in something ends, something begins he has female friends who he does not act disgusting to.

(this is considering part 2 as well): YES. there are so many little stupid fucking moments that drive me insane. such as that one, i already mentioned the rape joke to yennefer in limits of the possible/bounds of reason, the comment he made about she-elves in eternal flame was disgusting, all of his stupidity when he first met milva (commenting on her body, and also making a comment about how zerikkanian women cut off one of their breasts to shoot better, even though this is refuted by milva). how he says in lady of the lake that women don’t need money, since they don’t drink or gamble (in the presence of milva, who has drunken in his presence, and angouleme, for whom gambling is part of her backstory). also commenting on how he finds philippa scary and that he categorizes women into “fuckable” and “nonfuckable” basically. i think his comments towards yennefer in a little sacrifice are maybe the least horrible (just saying that she is old and isn’t a ‘normal woman’ because she is artifically young due to being a sorceress) but is still annoying.

i feel like the concept of brothel-going in general is supposedly “of the setting/time” and is normalized in their society but is taboo and mildly alarming to at least some in a modern audience,

i think it is also partially due to sapkowski normalizing the brothel-culture in-universe, and also (on the translators ends, too?) to be keen i guess to use terms like “whore”, like i think he calls toruviel in edge of the world something like “stupid whore,” which, if it came out of a man’s mouth today, hopefully he would be strangled.

the thing that is annoying is that he is a “good character,” he is literally the best friend of the main character, and is meant to represent that best-friend role. so his actions and sayings aren’t intended to villify him, but to be amusing, so it is assumed that the audience would find all of this amusing, which it’s not.

i think he can have this part of his personality (not misogyny, lol, but the “womanizing” as it relates to “being a dumbass”) without being so horrible, for example when vespula kicks him out of the house in eternal flame, i find this funny because he is obviously in the wrong, and he is experiencing punishment for it. additionally, things like repeating urban legends that zerrikanian women cut off their right breast in order to shoot better, to which milva ridicules him. or when he in his ballad sung that yennefer had a heart like a diamond that was unfeeling, and yennefer addresses this with him, and he shuts up and tries to steer the conversation elsewhere because it is obvious that he is terrified of her wrath...  it demonstrates that he is foolish and stupid, and is in the wrong, and can be made fun of. he did or said something (largely inconsequential, not violent or horrific) which was stupid, and is being ridiculed for it both in- and -out- of universe.

when he is in a position of power over the women however, saying derogatory things that men reading might agree with, that aren’t ever contested in-universe, then we have a problem. saying things like referring to women as whores, or trying to get a ‘full blooded she-elf’ at a brothel, or saying that he divides women into the fuckable and non-fuckable: these are never contested, he is never shamed for them, no one ever recieve retribution for them, and additionally, they are of a more violent and disgusting nature.

i feel like i treat geralt, yennefer, and dandelion all the same way overall. they each do and say some pretty messed-up things (geralt has sex with two barely 18-year old girls, yennefer smugly threatens to basically sexually assault geralt and was intending to mind-control a man into sex at belletyn (magic equivalent of a roofie; rape; what triss did to geralt), and dandelion espouses all of the misogynistic bullshit above). i like their characters but i simply cut this stuff out when i think about them because it adds nothing to them, only discomfort and disgust. it’s not intended to show “grey morality,” rather personal fallibility, and they are already fallible outside of such grossness. whether this affects if i headcanon dandelion as gay or bi i don’t know; i feel like it would be nice to rewrite some of his relationships with women to be more equal and less shitty (like how anna henrietta had an abusive husband beforehand and dandelion is not a violent man so ig it is nice to think she had some emotional love life with him around), but i also totally understand your perspective of just “there’s a lot to unpack here, but let’s just throw away the whole suitcase” haha. either way i think his [romantic] relationships with women are not very interesting at all, and i would rather focus on his platonic friendships with women, like milva, and/or mentorship/siblingship with essi. 

[clonerightsagenda]

The epilogues look terrible and I don’t want to spend my time reading them... but I love + trust your judgement and your takes on things. Could you summarize them? (No pressure if you don’t want to)

OK, it’s been a few weeks since i read it, but I will do my best.NOTE: This is probably not comprehensive and definitely not objective. As a supplement, I did some poking around, and the MSPA wiki has some bullet points. I also eventually found another  summary on tumblr, albeit by someone who also didn’t like it, so it is probably biased as well. 

ANOTHER NOTE: Those content warnings weren’t a joke. Below are references to sexual content, assault, suicide, sexism, transphobia, character death, and probably some other stuff.

WHAT HAPPENED:

In the prologue, Rose summons John to inform him that he needs to defeat Lord English right now, or they will all experience terrible consequences. These are mostly meta consequences you can interpret as ‘if we don’t produce new Homestuck content on its 10th anniversary, everyone will give up on this franchise for real, and also canon doesn’t seem stable when the big bad never got beaten’. John goes to visit Roxy and Calliope before he leaves and is given the option to eat either meet or candy. This represents a choice he is supposed to make, and that choice creates two timelines.

In MEAT, John travels back in time and gathers three 16 year old versions of his friends. They confront Caliborn in the battle he represented in his Masterpiece and are sucked into the house juju. Vriska activates it, but not before being pulled into the black hole. Rose and Jade die immediately, with Rose’s body being destroyed and Jade’s falling into the black hole, because why should women get to fight the story’s biggest misogynist. Dave lands a solid hit on English before having his head bitten off Mami from PMMM style. John gets chomped on as well and a gold tooth ends up embedded in his chest. Davepeta appears and drags the wounded LE into the black hole. John finds his father’s wallet, retrieves his car, and slumps inside. Terezi appears, in bad shape after a long time wandering the ring. She seems confused at his state (explained because in CANDY she has been texting that version of him for years). She removes the tooth from his chest and they have sex.

Meanwhile, on Earth, Dave and Karkat have avoided talking about being a relationship for seven years, while Jade harasses them about becoming a threesome. This is explicitly tied to her abandonment issues but also she is referred to as a slut so like. Don’t love that. Jane is running for president, and Dave thinks this is terrible because she’s a woman fascist and doesn’t understand the economy and Karkat should run instead. Other shit is happening but I lost track. Rose is ill because she’s becoming her ‘Ultimate Self’ and seeing all timelines. Dirk claims he’s overcome the same problem and offers to help her but ends up controlling her and revealing he is the one actually writing this narrative.  There is a bit where the narration starts addressing the reader directly and then turns orange which I admit is genuinely cool and might have been interesting if done with characters I didn’t actually care about.

Dirk amps up controlling the narrative, directly forcing people to do and think certain things. (For example, he sequesters Rose away in his workshop and tells Kanaya via narration she believes Rose is better off with him, and she uncomfortably agrees without understanding why she thinks that.) He supports Jane’s bid for the presidency, even though she wants to crack down on trolls because they are naturally violent and reproduce too fast. Everyone tries to get Jake’s endorsement because he’s popular, which includes Jane attempting to seduce him in a very uncomfortable scene.Then Jade slips into a nice coma, because it’s not Homestuck without Jade losing her agency, and alt!Calliope starts using her as an avatar to take control of the narrative away from Dirk. They have some back and forth arguments before he is pushed out which, again, is genuinely clever but would be more enjoyable without all the edgy bullshit. Dirk eventually tricks alt!Callie and sedates Jade, taking back control of the story. Jane wins the presidency. Also at some point Meat!Roxy and Callie ID as nonbinary and start using they/them, and narrator!Dirk freaks out about it and misgenders them a lot, which is character assassination bc everyone knows Dirk is a trans icon. Anyway. Dave and Karkat have an awkward talk about their relationship where they keep dancing around things and Dirk tries to force Dave to kiss him. Dave gets frustrated because he’s aware someone is trying to make him do something (like with the Aimless Renegade), and eventually yells at Dirk to get out of his head before kissing Karkat. Terezi brings John back to Earth, and he begins to fade, since apparently LE’s tooth was poisoned with something more powerful than god tier that makes you irrelevant. Possibly a meta commentary on the hero or story not being needed once the big bad is gone. Terezi is sad about this and listens to him bleed while she smells him die. Then Dirk contacts her via narration and implies he can help her. She gets a text (later revealed to be Vriska). Dirk gets a spaceship from Jake after forcing him via narration to grovel about how much he loves him and then rejecting him and flying away with Rose and Terezi in tow. Jade wakes up long enough to tell everyone Dirk’s gone bad before she gets repossessed and starts pointing in his direction, prompting everyone to give chase. 

There is a final scene that will make more sense later, so I’ll add it later.

CANDY

John decides not to go fight LE. Roxy is delighted, and they began dating. Calliope tells John it is time to let Gamzee out of the fridge. Gamzee pops out and claims he is redeemed in a long speech making fun of sloppy redemption arcs. He then proceeds to be terrible for the rest of the story.Candy essentially satirizes Harry Potter epilogue style fics. Jane marries Jake (it’s implied she essentially roofies him with the trickster lollipop) and has Gamzee on the side. They have a son named Tavros. John and Roxy have a son named Harry. Rose and Kanaya adopt a troll clone of Vriska and name her Vriska. Jade, Karkat, and Dave are all dating, but Dave and Karkat are miserable. Dirk kills himself when he realizes the timeline went off kilter. Jade’s corpse from the Meat timeline crashes to earth, and in the middle of the funeral (which was genuinely a good scene) she sits up, possessed by alt!Calliope. Alt!Callie sequesters herself on the old meteor, now landed, and explains to Aradia and Sollux that this timeline is a dead end and she is protecting it from the influence of the prince. She also, in a parallel to Dirk’s reveal in Meat, talks about how every narrator has an agenda even if the text is formatted to make you not realize that.Jane becomes a fascist dictator and begins oppressing trolls. Karkat eventually get sick of being in a trio and runs off to be a resistance leader, including getting a sick eye patch (reference to Summer Teen Romance). Meenah stole the Ring of Life from Meat John and lands in the session; she and Karkat begin dating. Other ghosts begin falling from the sky as well, and Gamzee converts them to his redemption religion.John feels like something is really off.  His only solace is texting Terezi a lot, and he seems closer to her than he is to his wife. He and Roxy break up for a while and then (non-romantically) reconcile. Jake eventually leaves Jane and takes Tavros with him. Jade and Dave become rebels as well, then Dave meets a hologram of Obama, who helps him attain his ultimate self, putting his soul in a new robot body. 

Oh, also Vriska falls out of the sky, has hatesex with Gamzee, kills him, and then talks with Rose and Kanaya’s Vriska about how she loves Terezi. Then she texts her, as seen in the Meat timeline. Isn’t Vriska 13 and Gamzee an adult at this point? Probably. There’s a lot of questionable age stuff in this.

I’m sure I missed some details. Can you tell I’m losing steam.

Anyway, the two last chapters of each section reference the other storyline. At the end of Meat, Lord English’s body falls out of the sky, and alt!Callie (still in Jade’s body) devours it, becoming powerful enough to battle Dirk. Candy!Davebot arrives and he and Aradia jump into the black hole in pursuit.At the end of Candy, Dirk’s ship nears a new planet where he intends a new game of SBURB to be played. Rose is in a robot body serving as his handmaid essentially, and Terezi’s also on board.  

TAKEAWAYS:

There are a lot of different interpretations of the epilogue. A mockery of the two extremes of fanfic. Andrew Hussie continuing the theme of ‘all authors are tyrants by nature’ and using his self-insert to display how he hates his own story but also can’t stop telling it. Dirk trying to create conflict by making himself a villain because otherwise they’ll lose relevance and disappear. Musing on how being arbitrarily labeled 'grown up’ when you’re not ready (aka handed godhood by a game that doesn’t understand people) can fuck you up, and there is no single winning screen in life. Just a big old meta experiment on unreliable narrators. I can see where some of this is coming from, but frankly, I found it disturbingly sexist (even if it is intended to be so for effect). A lot of the sex and violence felt over the top and graphic just to be #ow the edge rather than serving any narrative purpose. Also, authors can do what they want with their texts, and they’re allowed to write tragedies, but after Hussie’s self-insert informs Caliborn that the most important stories are about friendship and teamwork and the fandom (that I’ve seen anyway) really responding to the bonds between characters, it felt cruel. That’s my feeling. Not everyone shares it. But hey, I’ve got my solution.

[boglog]

Atypical notes

Before I start Hill House, here's my unsolicited opinions on Atypical (2017) seasons 1 & 2

[[more]]

Cons

Sam is hovering somewhere around top-tier privileged for an autistic person and I don't want to speak out of my place but the sheer whiteness of the show makes it fall below the radical impact I'm sure the creator intended

Granted they did include a range of POC secondary characters only to REALLY feel like secondary characters. A new wave of black best friends and Indian gurus approaches apparently. :/

This show feels largely autobiographical (getting a strong sense that the creator's brother was austitic?) which would definitely limit its scope but honestly? What about the black girl obsessed w ambulances who would have to work three times as hard for a last minute scholarship? What about the Asian girl who likes to sing but could never afford therapy? What about the black kid who wants to be a dentist but would get immediately sent to jail if a cop mistook his anxiety attack for being high? What about the blonde white girl who's surely been told for years how much she disgusts men for her inability to perform femininity? We don't know because protagonist Sam Gardener never talks to them!!

I hate to sound like I'm *** but coming of age plots that's v strictly about sex esp through the POV of a white boy who gets all his advice from misogynists is tired

I really do love Jessica but I'm not sure why the show has so many POV C plots w her, most of her life is more or less tangential to the Gardeners and all attempts to intertwine her and their plots together feel really forced and awkward. The theatrical irony of knowing the strawberry that ruined her relationship was Sam's lasted only so long

While there may be like three people on the planet as kind and dedicated as her, most therapists are not like this

I get it, I get it but the narration is annoying !!!!! (Not to mention after Sam stops going to therapy and these narration shots are officially non diegetic we're left to wonder where the heck he is and who he's talking to)

Filmmakers pls just accept that you want to add non diegesis and move on

As someone who watches an unhealthy amount of tv I've seen every possible way you can tackle an infidelity plot (w Gone Girl and Dr Foster of course being some of my faves 👀) and I'm sort of yawning thought the Elsa/Doug drama primarily bc

A I have literally no reason to care abt them, they're fairly unlikable / boring and

B it became an increasingly repetitive formula of Elsa assuming her dual wife mother role so enthusiastically it's read as naivety and control freak-ism and Doug goes from Just Standing There to leaving the room while Elsa's abandoned in an empty room

Every interaction is painful and I do not care about their relationship let alone the fact that Doug sleeps in the sun room of all places

No one wants to address the level of white boy emotional suppression you've got to go through to Punch A Wall ™ and call it a day?

Doug

Casey doesn't seem to care about anyone other than Izzie which is really unfortunate for Sharice

The prep school melodrama was nauseating not to mention how rushed the Casey and Izzie arc felt.

On the one hand I'm glad they dropped the mean girl rivalry early and there's a lot to be said about how WLW do behave in this internally conflicted way while navigating compulsory heterosexuality I just feel like they were running through a checklist not telling a story

Frankly most character arcs are either repetitive or rushed to a resolution

I know that real humans really can be ineloquent and bigoted but the arguments w Arlo's parents sounds so fake

Some real Gilmore Girls level of cheesy but at least Gilmore Girls had plausibly original dialogue

V unconvincing Useless Adulting 'What was her name? Ozzie?'

Pro

Occasionally actually poignant stuff abt autism... bc.... it's a show about autism

Was so close to getting the point with their episode on police brutality & ableism (one has to wonder what would happen to Sam if his father wasn't a literal paramedic though? Hmmmmm???)

A lot of elements abt psychiatry and social services etc feel plausibly realistic. That kind of is how group therapy goes

When Zaheed drops the pickup artist crap he's almost endearing

Edison's predecessor was named Tesla

The ickle bickle

Sam is probs able to draw a bicycle and therefore actually get into RISD (that makes one of us)

Amazing how I'm okay with about 70% of Casey's character

Izzie is an angel

And finally:

GAY SH*T

[aryanna5323]

I have literally never made my own post on here before and only like 3 entire people might see this, but I can't quit thinking about how much i dislike the idea of a black hermione granger. I first thought about this while having a conversation with my sister a while ago, but I just saw a fancast of a black girl as hermione on insta, and I have to spit this out somewhere.

The most obvious problem here is that if you want to have a main character be black.....maybe actually say that she's black? While writing the book? Not after publication? And definitely not after you said a white girl was the perfect actress and just what you imagined? You don't have to be like, "and this black girl came and knocked on our door" in the book, but you could mention her blackness other ways. Show her culture, but not as something weird and different. Describe the way shawdows cast from the candles in the great hall dance across her dark skin if you want. Just fucking describe it. And like not just once? Don't be like oh yeah she's black that's all because that's not all. Being black is about more than just having dark skin.

And also, why would jkr wax poetic about how pale other characters are and the way their skin looked if she didn't feel the need to describe hermione's dark skin at all? You can't just say "well I never said she was white... >;p". Don't make a main fucking character's appearance and culture ambiguous. Imagine giving someone a more genderneutral name like Alex and just never using pronouns. That's kinda strange right? Like are we supposed to say she/her, he/him, they/them? You wouldn't make it so we wouldn't know what to call a character accurately, so why make it where we can't imagine and understand a character accurately? If you're going to identify a character, fucking fully identify them. Let us actually know who they are. Bc again, being black is not that same as being white so that ambiguity is shit. You can't tell me hermione's personality would be the exact same if she were white or if she were black. There are differing cultures and experiences, and you have to include those in the character.

And when you basically surround this character with white characters and don't specifically mention that she's black, you can't expect us not to assume she's white as well. It's especially bad though, when jkr makes it disgustingly obvious when other characters aren't white. Fucking Cho Chang. Kingsley fucking Shacklebolt. I think that's all I need to say on that point.

Basically, if you want a character to be a certain ethnicity, just fucking say it (without going overboard and playing into gross stereotypes!!). It's not that hard. She described a few other characters' non-whiteness. Why couldn't she describe this in one of the main characters then?

Another issue with hermione being black is that there are few other black girls being actively described in this series. While it's fine to have very few black girls in a fictional school when it's a predominately white area in real life, it's not fine to shit all over the most described black girl for having bad hair and teeth. If you mainly only talk about one black girl and you give her bad hair and bad teeth and then say she's not pretty.....this is a problem to me. It feels like jkr thinks black girls in general have bad hair and teeth. Like their natural hair and teeth make them ugly. It feels like she's associating blackness with ugliness. Which, fuck that.

I know a lot of black girls are proud of their hair and their teeth, as they should be. But I also know that a lot of black girls don't like their hair or teeth because what's shown as conventionally pretty for hair is often straight hair, and for teeth it's perfectly closed, straight front teeth since these things are attributed to being closer to a standard of whiteness, which is what is portrayed by the media in the most positive light (which is also shitty and a different conversation).

My little sister is half black, and we spend a lot of time telling her how much we love her curls and how much we love her smile because we don't want her to grow up and think her hair is ugly and damage it to make it "pretty" or if she has a gap in her teeth that she has to close it. So to say that a very popular female character, known for her bad and untamable hair, who purposely fixes her teeth that she hates, is black, does not send a good message to young black girls. It's something I would steer my little sister far away from.

I also don't like the idea of hermione being black and the only one who cares about the house elves' enslavement. I would understand maybe her being black and the first person noticing the wrongness (even though in this century people in general should see the wrongness) or at least feeling the most motivated to stand against it based on her background (it's all a stretch but I'm trying to give the benefit of the doubt here), but shouldn't her friends realize how she might feel being black and surrounded by literal fucking slaves? Why wouldn't her friends join S.P.E.W.? Shouldn't ron specifically, who loves her, try to be more supportive and understanding instead of rude and condescending? Shouldn't harry, who was normally the one standing up for hermione, who made friends with a house elf and freed him after being mortified by his treatment, care a little more? I feel like the house elves' situation was mostly for laughs and barely for plot and almost unrelated to character development (besides the fact that the whole house elf plot was disgusting itself. Saying that slaves enjoy their work and were disrespected by someone trying to free them?? Wtf???? But that's a whole other can of worms more unrelated to having a black hermione). If hermione were black, this could've been made a huge moment where a big movement was started and led by a black girl (as we've seen and as is so often ignored in history! Black women are powerful. Give them their power in literature too!!). Instead of a joke of one whose meetings were never attended except by people who wanted hermione to quit annoying them. Instead of never following through with the house elves and leaving them in the dust when the plot got too busy. Instead of saying hermione is black so she's the only one who can really care about slavery.

Don't get me wrong, I would love a black hermione if the setup were different. If she wasn't told that some of her physical characteristics that balck girls can often be insecure about are ugly, if she were actively described as black and her blackness was incorporated into the character, if she wasn't the only character to truly care about an enslaved species, then a black hermione would be badass. A black girl as one of the main characters, who is so smart, who the chosen one would fail without, is powerful. It's saying black girls are smart and clever and important. It would've been so fucking cool if hermione were black if it was done in the right way. A powerful black girl, one of the brightest of her generation, who stands up for others. She would get all my love.

But I can't get behind her if she's ignored or shit on for things that would seemingly stem from her blackness. I, personally, think that it's better leaving her as white, since i think this is what jkr truly intended and worming around those intentions can lead to some nasty implications, and getting behind other black girls who got (or will get for the yet-unwritten ones!) the attention from their writers that they deserve.

I'm so open to having a conversation about this, especially if this is not how the black community perceives having a black hermione. Like if you're black and you think i twisted things and completely fucked this up, I'm begging you to shit all over me for it. I'm not trying to press my white bitch perspective (when I'm much less knowledgeable) on a community with lived experience. This is just how I felt jkr came across as completely insensitve and shitty with this comment. Or ways I thought having a black hermione was more bad than good if that statement was true, by whatever definition we want to give that word here. But if I'm wrong, I want to learn from this. I don't want to be speaking for black girls here, i want to be standing behind them in support. I just can't make myself spin this situation in a more positive light, not after everything jkr's said about her "gay" characters and about real trans people, without a little assistance (if y'all think I'm wrong and that assistance is necessary, anyway). I just don't have that faith in her. But if black girls truly think that having a black hermione does more good than bad, I'll be behind you and I'll support you.

Love for anyone reading this except for prejudiced bitches, homophobes, terfs, misogynists, and other shitty people of the like! <3 <3 <3

[yakumtsaki]

CHILLIN LIKE A VILLAIN. Pleased with yourself, are you, Becky with the good hair?

-Oh quite, though I’d be more pleased if my damn arm would unglitch.

HA looks like it got stuck while you were putting your filthy hands on Wyatt. God’s punishment is swift. Know what else is gonna be swift? YOUR DEATH. Get him, Waylon Fairchild Dementia Raven Way!

-Ugh, no way, I’m exhausted, everyone is in love with me and I just want to be with Draco, ok? Why couldn’t Satan make me less beautiful? IT’S A CURSE

Waylon sis truly don’t even talk to me about curses and Satan right now, this entire lot is cursed and crawling with evil spirits and beelzebubian energies. Ever since we moved here my life has never known peace. Next thing you know snakes are gonna start manifesting in this house physically.

Well looks like the snakes are already here. FRANCES WILL YOU FUCKING STOP ALREADY YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED JOYATT IS DEAD NOW CEASE AND DESIST

-No way bitch, time to suffer. Look at it and weep, look at it with your own two eyes!

First of all I’ve been weeping since yesterday so joke’s on you. Secondly I still can’t believe you did this to me after I generously gave you this whole debonair look YOU’RE THE WORST

-La la la can’t hear you over the sound of your plans crumbling all around me!!

I’m seriously gonna murder you a thousand times. Wyatt what about you, you dumbass bimbo? What do you have to say for yourself?

-Not beaucoup, I honestly don’t know why I’m doing this, it makes absolument no sense! Huhu! 

I hate you both so fucking much I might actually vomit.

Ugh my poor Jojo </3 I’m so sorry that your love life has turned into a giant pile of crap.

-Please, who cares.. Definitely not me!

Yeah well that much is obvious! Are you sure you’re alright tho? Because you look, you know. worryingly expressionless and in denial.

-Oh no, I’m just focusing on my new proposal,“Project MKUltra: The Comeback”. It’ll be a cold day in hell before I have to deal with adulterous whores again!

Good, good, pour yourself into your art. Speaking of, maybe it’s also time to pour yourself a refreshing drink?

Attaboy, milk that cowplant, Jojo!

-Hmm this process feels oddly sexual..

Yea, I can tell by your massive erection, jesus, I mean even for you-

-Ew no what the hell? That’s just because Ti-Ning is dead!

Oh ok, that’s fine then!

-YES YEEEEES I FEEL THE POWER COURSING THROUGH MY VEINS

Hard to believe anything can course through your veins with all that ice in there but alright. Now we just have to wait..

..for the cowplant to get hungry again. I literally can’t with Daniel and Gunther constantly picking fights with Jojo’s former suitors, especially since Jojo doesn’t seem to give enough of a fuck to fight them himself. We are family, I got all my sisters with me!

Ugh I keep forgetting Daniel has 9 nice points, what a crybaby. How you gonna fight capitalism when you can’t even fight Wyatt?? MAN UP DAN

Nice, there we go! I’m truly living for Brit’s utter lack of interest in fights happening next to her. Her aspiration bar is about to hit the crapper bc I’m even worse at playing popularity sims than I am at getting couples not to whore around, so the time has come..

TO PARTY HARD, TOGA STYLE. I really threw this party thinking it would be a success and save Brit from aspiration failure, so obviously the time has come to acknowledge that I’m even stupider than Wyatt. Things get off to a good enough start with the profs tickling each other, which everyone knows is the mark of a wild college party!

Ti-Ning, gone but never forgotten.

-Hey Brit, want some Ti-Ning to wash down that pizza? 

-Please stop addressing me.

-That’s right, address moi instead! 

NO YOU DON’T WYATT. YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE

..........................................................................all I can say is LMAO

Wyatt, sweetie, full offense, exactly how dumb are you?

-What? I wanna marry Jojό! <3

Ok. Do you have any recollection of breaking his “heart” 2 hours ago, setting him on the path of a complete nervous breakdown?

-Oh, that was just a bump on la route, don’t be so dramatique!

-Does it count as a win if the only thing you put in the hole.. are your tears?

.....god.

Meanwhile and to the surprise of no one, Gunther is being sexually harassed by a professor, namely Down-With-The-Kids-Pink-Beanie.

-Sooo Gunther, half-alien professor told me all about you, you little ginger minx.. What do you say you and I adjourn somewhere private and I see if the carpet matches the drapes..

-EW forget it, lady, you’re not even in the art department and I only have one rule: no whoring without extra scoring.

Um what about the rule of monogamous dating which you are currently doing with Mel?

-RIGHT that too!

Once again...god.

The one person having a great time at this party is Kevin Beare, who eats half a pizza by himself..

..and then moves on to chips. He legit came here for the free food and didn’t talk to anyone the entire time, which is what I do at every party except with drinks. Live your truth, Kev!

Look who’s back from class and still glitched lolol

-Can you please reset me already, I had to take an exam like this!!!

Pfff grades??? There are so many more important things in life, Fran. Live a little, join the celebration.. party like there’s no tomorrow. CAUSE THERE ISN’T

I’ve no idea what happened here but Tiffany is non-stop bullying this 2006-Oliver-Sykes haired professor. Judging from Pink Beanie and sims professors in general it’s safe to say he deserves it. GET HIM TIFF 

-Why doesn’t anyone want to fuck me, Frank? What am I doing wrong? Has Woody Allen been lying to us about hot young women being uncontrollably attracted to neurotic, misogynist, mediocre intellectuals over 60?

Oh great, I thought this party was gonna end as a dud but I see we’re going for full-on disaster.

-I’ve just about had enough of you and your passé casquette, communiste! 

-My casquette is not passé, it’s classic!

-LADY STOP TRYING TO GET UNDER MY TOGA

-Aw come on, please? For mommy?

-You should use that line on Jojo where it might actually work!

Enemies, these bitches my enemies, not on my level so they just pretend to be, yes, why do you envy me? Cause I am the MVP, these bitches my enemies ♪

-FOR THE GLORY OF THE USSR 

Yea, seems about right. Whatever though, cause after the party..

COMES THE CAKE.

Goodbye Francis, it’s been nice, hope you find your paradise!

-Oh please, SEE YOU IN HELL BITCH. WAIT FOR ME CAUSE I’M GONNA FIGHT YOU THERE TOO

It’s a beautiful morning and our llama friend is back to spread some school pride and presumably some bodily fluids. We almost went an entire day without seeing him but here he is again!  GET OUT OF MELODY’S SHOWER YOU FUCKING CREEP

-FINE. YOU’RE GONNA APPRECIATE ME WHEN I’M GONE

Yea don’t worry that day is permanently coming as soon as we milk Frances out of the cowplant. Honestly this fucking llama is the last straw, the time has come for me to take back control of this house..

..starting with getting sweet, dumb Wyatt back with Jojo! I really think the Frances thing was a fluke, I mean W wasn’t in a committed relationship with Jo, he didn’t initiate it and he rolled the want to get engaged to him for the second time after it. So the whole thing = Fran’s + ACR’s fault!!!1 Also and more importantly we have literally 0 other viable options and college is almost done so it’s time for Jojo to put Lemonade on repeat and get over it.

Let’s bring out the big guns!

-Mom! it’s so good to hear your insufferably domineering voice. Did you get my latest murder pics?

-Ha! Yes they are great, thank you mom. Soon I’ll add the french courtesan to my album. Now tell me, in as much detail as possible, how proud of me you are!

-I don’t know how Wyatt is doing, he’s the french courtesan, I’m going to kill him! Are you even listening to me?

-What do you mean it’s probably my fault? Can you divorce dad already, his influence on your brain has been catastrophic.

-Love is a battlefield? Mom seriously. Divorce. Now.

-Ugh yes, I could imprison him in a gigantic safe for a few days instead of killing him, but what on earth would that achieve?

-Well I don’t care about having a husband! Worst case scenario, I’ll just marry Max!

-Yes, Max does look like dad. Yes, he is as dumb as him. YES, MOM, I KNOW. HONESTLY YOU’RE ONE TO TALK 

-Well, I have to go now, but you’ve certainly given me a lot to think about. And by that I mean which care home to put you in cause you’ve obviously lost it. Goodbye, mother.

As soon as Jojo hangs up the phone Melody runs over to autonomously lecture him. Nice move, Mel, let’s peer pressure him till he caves!

-Jojo this is an intervention but please don’t mistake it as me actually caring about you. Your bullshit harem drama has taken over the entire greek house storyline and enough is enough, we demand equal airtime. Just forgive Wyatt already, he’s too hot for you and you were literally dating 2 other dudes at the same time and you also treated him like shit and you are the worst and Gunther is the best and he’s gonna beat you for heir. Melody out.

Yes, powerful stuff, thank you, Mel. Now Wyatt, let’s apologize!

-I’m so sorry I kissed Frances, Jojό, I don’t know what I was thinking </3

That’s a great start Wyatt, now let’s try it facing the right way!

-I’m so sorry I kissed Frances, Jojό, I don’t know what I was thinking </3 Also I’m totally planning our wedding in my head you right now.

Ok, smaller steps, let’s get him to not hate you first!

If there’s one thing I hate about ts2 it’s how ridiculously hard it is to be forgiven for cheating, shit is unreal. Wyatt has been apologizing for about 3 years now and Jojo is still furious jfc, it’s legit easier to get forgiven for cheating irl than it is in this game.

-For the thousandth time, I’m so so sorry Jojό, honestly in the dark of the nuit at first I thought Frances was you and then it was too late!

-Yes, it was also broad daylight.

-Well you know I have bad eyesight, mon cheri :(

Wyatt seriously, we’ve reached the point where you’re throwing junk out there, so let’s take a break.. 

..from this fucking house! It’s date time! Time for dinner and public woohoo in that vegan restaurant downtown, cause I’ve ignored Gunther so hard his aspiration is currently scarlet red. Mel is doing great though, like all knowledge sims in uni, she’s legit never not-platinum. The adorable couple make themselves right at home, by doing literally what they do at home 20h a day. NOT WHAT WE CAME HERE FOR GET UP

-Maybe if we act like children they’ll think we’re under 12 and we’ll get a discount!

-We’re so in sync, babe, I brought my monster trucks with me for this very eventuality!

-Here, let me blow you a kiss, babe. A prelude of tonight’s blowing. 

-Honestly, every time you talk, I just see the eggplant emoji <3

I didn’t vomit from Wyatt/Frances but this date might actually do the trick!

-Do you think the waiter is mad that we insisted on lobster in a vegan restaurant and he had to go fishing for it?

-Whatever, babe, we deserve it. 

-We really do. I ship us.

-I ship us too <3

Good because I don’t anymore.

Yaas, aspiration problems taken care of! Mel’s shy ass hilariously had a fear of having her photo taken, but public fornication she has no issue with.

-Having your photo taken is unnatural! I’m just using the photo booth as god intended. 

Ofc, on the 6th day, god created the photobooth for people to publicly fuck in.

-Wow Mel, my reflection in your sunglasses is so beautiful.

-So is mine in yours, babe.

-I almost wish we could look into each other’s eyes but then it’d ruin our whole look. You know what, screw it..

-..I was gonna wait till we graduated it and were more mature and crap like that, but whatever, babe, when it’s right, you know. Will you marry me, Melody Tinker, despite the certainty that one or more of our kids will get the Komei nose?

-Oh my god, Gunther! I literally thought you’d never ask, because, let’s be real, you’re a gigantic slut.

-These days are gone, babe, I’m a changed man!

-This ring has been in my family for half a generation, ever since my mom stole it from Florence Delarosa who was obviously never gonna need it.

-Oh it’s beautiful and the fact it’s stolen makes it even more precious!

It’s morphin time! Let’s pretend the red around Gunther’s memory signifies passion and not a crippling fear of commitment. Congrats you gross, crazy kids!

It’s also morphine time, cause damn are we broke as shit. In hindsight perhaps we shouldn’t have gotten the lobster.

We return home, where I’m trying to fulfill Jojo’s longstanding wish to see Ti-Ning’s ghost but apparently Ti-Ning is an even bigger asshole dead than he was alive. Bitch seems to be deliberately refusing to scare Jojo, I mean we’ve been standing around playing ghostbusters for like 4 hours now and it’s just not happening-

-but some scary shit IS happening inside. WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS.

-What!? We’re just talking about our mutual interest in entertainment.

Brit seriously, don’t make me kill you cause I’ll do it, I’m kinda on a roll here and completely exhausted from this fuckery.

-Gawd, fine, I’m gonna go to sleep.

GO TO A DIFFERENT BED. I’ve noticed a sudden and disturbing reappearance of slutty wants in Gunther’s panel immediately after the engagement, which I’m guessing is some kind of regression back to his usual pattern, like he’s rolling wants to woohoo 10 sims and makeout with another 20 and idek. It’s extremely pissing me off and it’s also extremely not happening.

I JUST SAID IT’S NOT HAPPENING. FUCKING STOP IT.

-We’re just friends!!! Paranoid much?

CAN YOU BLAME ME 

Look here, THIS is the distance I wanna see between you two. It’s also NOT the distance I wanna see between Wyatt and Jojo, man this apology shit is taking fucking forever UGGGH

-Jojό, are you still mad at me?

-What do you think?

-No?

-Guess again.

-No?

-Ugh.

-Oh Jojό, I know you hate me but I’m gonna keep apologizing for the rest of ma vie, cause I really have nothing better to do. And also because je t’aime, Jojό.  Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold cold cœur?

YES. FUCKING FINALLY. I HEAR HEARTS I HEAR HEARTS!!!!!

THEY’RE JUST NOT COMING FROM THE LIVING ROOM!!!!!11

KILL ME. I WILL PAY SOMEONE TO KILL ME. DON’T TELL ME WHEN YOU’RE COMING JUST SHOW UP AND DO IT. TAKE MY CAT ON THE WAY OUT AND FIND HIM A GOOD HOME. I’M DONE.

[raviposting]

jonerys

Long fucking post ahead lmao so it’s going under a read more after the bullets. And just bc this specific fandom likes to comment on my posts all the time I’m gonna get this out of the way first and then talk about them more in the ask: 

I know boat sex is going to happen. 

I know the Targs have incestuous relationships and that Starks have had cousin marriages. (Although incest relationships also are portrayed as negative in both book and show but more on that later.)

Yes, I’ve seen this coming. I know the series’ name, I am in no way surprised that Jon and Dany will be together in a non-platonic way. 

Coming off that, I know the books will have them too. That...doesn’t mean I can’t still criticize the decision. You can understand why something was written and still dislike that it happened. 

This is only going to be tagged “anti jonerys”. Not anything else related to the show/books. I’m not invading your tag, so you’re either on mobile where their filtering system sucks or you’re scrolling through the anti tags. Either way, please chill out about it. 

All right, so, I’ve always kind of assumed Jon and Dany would meet, and also that they’d have some type of romantic relationship. The series is called A Song of Ice and Fire, and save it being a twist and referring to Jon, chances are it’s about both Jon and Dany. I didn’t particularly like that - as I’m not into incest ships - but I figured it would happen in some capacity. I figured they might fall hard for each other, then have the reveal, and then the two would have to work with that fallout (and I’ve thought maybe they’d have a political marriage to just make it work for both of them, but my ideal - beyond, you know, no romance - has always been that if they have to get married, that it be platonic). 

So, let’s go with points 2-5 first: I still do wish that after the reveal they don’t transition into a full out romance, but the show (and books) are going to do what they’re going to do, and I’ve already accepted that and have my ideals that I hope will happen. I do still think that the book may not have them be a completely endgame ship, however. While yes, the Targs have been incestuous, this has also led to people thinking negatively of their house. People have claimed that the Targaryens were destroyed because they were so incestuous. Generations of incest is not healthy, which was shown with the “great or mad” issue. Every time a Targ is born they’ll either be great, or a mad ruler, and it’s implied that it’s due to them having a long history of incestuous marriages. 

And yes, the Starks have had cousin marriages before, but none of our current main characters (that we root for) have expressed any interest in a relative - not even Dany, who will be more open to it than Jon, I’ll give you that, but still never expressed interest in say, Viserys, who she expected to marry. 

The ones that do are shamed for it - whether it be Cersei and Jaime (brother and sister) or Cersei and Lancel (cousins). Incest may have been a thing in their family history, but this current cast of characters? It’s definitely not as looked upon as it was in their parents’ time, but rather as a negative aspect of their house system. And..sidenote. This is about fandom, but why is it that fans very smugly say “it’s incest, it’s not a dealbreaker for them this is their world”? Like...I really don’t get the reasoning in that because the characters may not be as strongly opposed to it as modern day viewers are, but...like...why is the incest not a dealbreaker for you, someone who is in our world and not the GOT world??? 

And then for 1, and I suppose 3. Again, I know they’re gonna happen. I know boat sex is going to happen. But you know what? They have no chemistry - I know, I know, chemistry is subjective. But to me, I’ve seen no romantic chemistry. Before season 7, I thought I would have to fight against the chemistry. And, even though I hate Jonerys, I loved the idea of Jon & Dany meeting, I was hyped for it, ready to enjoy it. But...it just. There’s nothing there. After 10 minutes I was bored because the chemistry I had expected? Wasn’t there. It just feels flat and boring. 

If it weren’t for tumblr and Davos’s “looking at her good heart” line I wouldn’t know it was supposed to be a romance - which, by the way, the fact that the writers have to throw in that line, to let people know that’s what they intend? It’s bad writing. I have friends who aren’t on tumblr, and when I tell them people ship Jon and Dany, the first reaction is usually “wait, why? They don’t even like each other.” 

Kit and Emilia are good actors, but I just don’t see that chemistry. And I know they have the potential to have that romantic spark - Jon with Ygritte, even Jon with Gendry gave me more in 5 seconds than 3 episodes with Dany. I don’t even like the Jorah/Dany ship, yet I see the romantic chemistry far better. Sometimes I think I see a romantic emotion from Dany, but Jon? He seems completely uninterested and more than willing to get away from her presence and back home to fight the white walkers. And the way their fandom talks about it, it just reads like every Straight Person(TM) joke post I’ve ever seen. They argue, seem to actively dislike each other, and Jon keeps asking to leave yet fans will portray it as romantic or couple goals and...no. That’s not, they’re literally in the same room or actively asking to go away that’s...not romantic? Incest or not, I see nothing romantic between them and the boat sex scene? The fact that it’s only 2 episodes away feels extremely forced to me, as has most of Jon and Dany’s interactions this entire season, and it may be canon in both book and show but if it had to be, it definitely could have been written better. 

And god, fandom has been irritating me and that’s honestly bumped up how much I dislike the ship, I’m going to be completely honest.  Commenting on just about every post, refusing valid criticisms as “the haters”, mixed in with certain Dany fans who think any comment about her being a White Savior is misogynistic (rather than, you know, listening to actual POC fans). The fandom has actively made me hate this ship more than I ever thought I could, because by god I was really just of the idea of “it’ll happen and I’ll hate it but I guess I’ll just ignore it” mood before season 7 lmao. 

Regardless, that’s basically it.

tl;dr:  I’m not into it because I don’t ship incest and I don’t see the chemistry, and because fandom is one of the most intrusive groups I have ever seen. 

Send me a ship and I’ll give you my (brutally) honest opinion on it

[nyangibun]

do you believe in the leaks that appeared on reddit? they seemed fake at first to me, but then more photos started showing up and were confirming some statements that the author of the leaks made, so i'm starting to be concerned bc if it's true then jonsa won't happen, and the angry wierwood kiss won't happen, and the whole season will be a disappointment (not because of jonsa, although i very much like them) but because of the cheesy and cheap storyline.

Honestly, I don’t. Maybe it’s blind optimism or just stubborn denial, but I really don’t think it’s possible for someone to know that much about the episodes. HBO and D&D have become increasingly strict and protective of their scripts (especially this season as it’s the first D&D are making completely independent of the books). I don’t doubt that some of those leaks are true, but have you ever played Chinese Whispers? One person will tell another person something then so on and so forth, so that by the time you get to the last person, the sentence is so watered down it only vaguely resembles the original statement (or if your friends suck then it resembles absolutely nothing). I think the leaks are something like that. Or they’re intentional leaks made by HBO and D&D to stave off the rabid fans and throw people off the trail. 

Whether it’s true or not, I don’t think you should let that affect your love of Jonsa! And to add, I also really don’t think Jon3rys boatbang will be the romantic be all and end all their shippers are saying. There’s no sensical way that Jon and Dany end up together, and even some of them admit that. One’s either gonna die or both. Also, if there is a Narrative God somewhere, Jon will not kneel to Dany. There is no conceivable way he does without completely regressing his entire character’s arc. Did they not learn from Robb’s death? I mean was this quote from Robett Glover said for the sake of filling spaces: 

“Taking up with a foreign whore, getting himself, and those who followed him, killed.”

It’s not the first time as well that someone has used the term ‘foreign whore’. They also say it in relation to Dany when she was with Drogo. 

“A Khal who takes orders from a foreign whore is no khal at all!“

Now, I really hate the term ‘whore’ on a very visceral level, so even me just using these examples to explain why Jon won’t kneel for Dany feels so utterly misogynistic. But I’m not prescribing to the sentiments expressed here. I’m merely reiterating what’s been said in the show and how nothing is ever really a coincidence. If Jon kneels to Dany, chaos will ensue. Death and destruction and all sorts of mayhem worse than what’s already happening. But Jon isn’t Robb. Although I do believe Jon has a tendency to be just as emotionally driven as Robb, he is also much wiser. He can see the bigger picture; he is bound by his honour and duty no matter the situation. Kneeling to Dany would be to take all of the faith the Northern houses have placed in him as their King (which he knows is precarious at best right now) and basically pissing on it. He will make concessions to garner Dany as an ally because he needs numbers. He will forego his pride for the greater good, but kneeling before a foreign queen would be a sign of weakness. I don’t believe Jon would do that. 

If he does, by god, I will start a revolution.

And the boatbang nonsense? I think if it happens it’s a red herring to Jonsa being endgame. After all, there has to be a reason why S6 spent so much time focusing on their relationship. The romantic tropes are there. It’s in the cinematography, the directing, acting and producing. People can deny it, but there are enough people (fandom and non-fandom) who’ve seen it. It can’t be a ‘mistake’. 

But like I said, maybe it’s just blind optimism mixed in with stubborn denial. Let’s just hold hands, Anonny, and pray for the best.  

[petestarebanks]

this turned into a lot of talking i’m drunk sorry

since i love talking about myself and i’m working on finishing all the random cider/alcoholic drinks in my fridge i appeciate @chitown-sounder for tagging me in this

1) How tall are you? I’m 5′7″ and I don’t have anything else to say about that. 

2) What Color And Style Is Your Hair? My hair is medium brown which is v boring I want to dye it like daaaaaaark brown in an attempt to match my fingernails and my wardrobe which are both slowly entering the shadow realm until I can finally take my rightful place as an all powerful witch of darkness where I belong. Lately I’ve been working on growing my hair back out, right now it’s just below the middle of my back bc a year and a half ago I decided I wanted to go back to the bob I had in senior year of high school. Generally speaking my hair is an awful mess.

3) What Color Are Your Eyes? Depending on the day/weather/my mood/the color of my shirt it varies between blues and greens and greys. I wish I was constantly crying so they could be green always. 

4) Do You Wear Glasses? Yeah and tbh people always ask me why I don’t wear contacts and like why the fuck would I? When I got glasses in the 10th grade (After 3 years of staring at a computer screen bc I got obsessed with writing and never wanted to leave the house I developed near-sightedness like a fuckin dope) I was hype af they somehow made my face look less round imo like honestly my glasses make me look older and less pudgy and I fuck with that shit. I, like my dawg Cody, also am getting new glasses in like a week or so (They’ll be in on the 11th and I’m reeeeady) and I got 2 pairs, one of which is the same rectangle shape I’ve always had and the other one is more fahionable and maybe I’ll like them??? I better bc they were expensive but they were literally buy one get one free so....... Idk they’re more round shaped I can’t wait to put new accessories on my face

5) Do You Have Braces? I never did and it’s funny I always had a fucked up dental situation ok my front 4 teeth on the top were shaped like |_|_/\_||_| it wasn’t a gap or anything my teeth were just angled like that??? Apparently there was a bone in my gum where it shouldn’t have been and it was keeping my teeth from growing right and so when I was like 8 they did a removal of all 4 teeth like - ya girl was in the third grade missing my 4 front teeth??????????? Embarrassing anyway they took out the teeth and when I went back a few months later to get the bone out there was literally no bone there? There was no explanation for it it just wasn’t there and my teeth grew back in perfect. My teeth aren’t perfect by any means like I have a severe overbite and my lower row has a small gap in the front and also I had a fuckin tooth that grew in the middle of the roof of my fucking mouth????????????????????????? Teeth are so weird anyway that tooth got taken out and I’m just here living with a semi-ok mouf now

6) What Is Your Fashion Sense? Whatever I feel like wearing when I get out of bed 15 mins before I’m supposed to be at work lmao whatever takes the least effort and still looks put together enough. There’s a lot of black and particularly black leggings bc they almost pass for dress pants which works for my job. Also a lot of camisoles paired with shawl/overshirt things idk what they’re called. And jean shorts whenever I’m not at work.

7) Do You Have Any Siblings? I have 4 step sibs and 3 sisters - my sister Candace is 28 and got married last year, we always argue about politics (we are on the same side but she is a realist and I’m a romantic) but we love each other even though she makes me cry from emotions and frustration. My step brother John is 27 and he’s always been a fuckin dickhead even when we were kids and they were just my neighbors and not my step sibs - yes my father is dating a woman who used to live across the street from us in the neighborhood I grew up in - He is v strong and has strong opinions, has a lot of tattoos and is a misogynist. My sister Jackie is 26 and is a human fucking landfill who I haven’t spoken directly to in 4 months bc she got mad at me when I showed concern about her boyfriend being abusive, then he did beat her ass and when I tried to talk to her about it she fuckin blocked me on Facebook. Oh yeah and she’s pregnant with his kid and won’t stop smoking cigars. Fucking landfill. My step sis Amanda is 23, always a good time even if she’s a super thot, she has 2 babies who I love more than anything and she lets men make a fool out of her more often than not. I love her. My step brother Chris is my fave step sib mainly bc he went from being an actual juvenile delinquent, arrested and then on parole at age 15 even, to being the first of his family to graduate high school on the same day as me, with a steady job and a wife and a baby and paying his own bills I’M SO PROUD OF HIM. My step sister Tory is 19 and she doesn’t have a real name she’s just Tory, is a bigger fuckin thot than Amanda literally this bitch is in the DM’s of every dude I know and I’m not shaming her like boo do whatever u wanna do but be better at it? Be a boss ass bitch and don’t let ppl make fun of u for being a human disaster?  My younger half-sister Dalaney (Literally, named after Dale Earnhardt thanks to my trash father lmao) is 11 and she lives with her mother in Minnesota. She comes to see us every summer and she is so fucking funny, she is a tomboy and she is a sassmaster just like the rest of us I love her sfm. 

8) What Kind Of Student Are You? I was an honors sudent, took AP classes and barely skirted by (But passed the final exams while my geek fuckin classmates sobbed bc they failed lmao) I graduated with a 4.89 so like, I was litty. I never studied bc why would i read the same thing twice? I also missed a day a week from 6th grade to graduation, bc I was “sick” but really I didn’t feel like going. My mom thought I was lactose intolerant bc I faked sick so much. One time Amanda and I let my mom drive us to school only to walk home (3 miles) and get stopped by a police officer 20 feet from my front door, he wanted to know why we weren’t at school and we lied and said we missed the bus but our moms were fine with us not going to school that day. That fuckin cop offered us a ride to school so we had no choice but to go to school after all that!!!! Then in senior year when my mom left me to live with Jackie I was literally missing 2-3 weeks at a time until the AP was like “If u miss 40 days of school this semester you will be considered a drop out” and I was like “Fuck” so I finished and graduated and never went to college because fuck the education system tbq fuckin h. 

9) What Are Your Favorite Subjects? Math, History, English, Human Geography. I loved learning, that was why I never wanted to be at school, everything was fucking boring but when I had the right teachers, in these subjects in particular, I actually wanted to be there. 

10) What Are Your Favorite TV Shows? I never watched TV until like the last year, I finally got a Netflix subscription and caught up on shit people have been raving about for years but I was completely late on - Shameless, Orange Is The New Black, American Horror Story, Bates Motel, How To Get Away With Murder, in particular. Otherwise I just watch sports. Literally the only reason I pay for cable is so I can watch sports. 

11) Favorite Books? BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH Scott WESTERFELD ANRD NEAL SHUSTERMAN. LIKE OK I’LL BE A HARRY POTTER STAN ALL MY LIFE. BUT. SCOTT WESTERFELD WROTE AN INGENIOUS SERIES ABOUT SOCIETAL STANDARDS OF BEAUTY (uglies/pretties/specials/extras) AND ALSO HIS VAMPIRE SERIES WHERE VAMPIRISM WAS TRANSMitted through sex and cats (peeps, the last days) WERE THE ONLY VAMPIRE BOOKS I EVER READ LMAOOOO. then, fucking neal. fucking neal shusterman changed my entire life for the better with a series about a future where the pro-life/prochoice battle turned into parents literally having the option of just, not dealing with their unruly teens anymore by having their body parts fucking dispersed to ppl who needed like new hearts, arms, etc (unwind/unwholly/unsouled/undivided) FUCKING ICONIC and also THE SERIES NEAL WROTE ABOUT KIDS WHO DIED AND WERE STUCK IN LIMBO BC THIS EVIL BITCH WOULDN’T LET THEM GO TO HEAVEN (everlost/everwild/everfound) GOD I LOVE BOOKS SO FUCKING MUCH OK. ALSO FOR MY NON-RELIGIOUS ASS EAST OF EDEN BY JOHN STEINBECK IS FUCKIN EVERYTHING. LIFE OF PI ALSO FUCK AND TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD BOOKS ARE GREAT.

12) Favorite Pastimes? If I’m not Netflix binging or watching sports or going to the movies with my friends or drinking with the one friend I have who I can drink with, I’m writing. I have literally 25 characters now I’m fucking trash but I love them all so much ok leave me alone. 

13) Any Regrets? Nah I think I’m the smartest most reasonable person on the planet so I think everything I do is right and not questionable at all lmao. 

14) What Is Your Dream Job? Huh. Hard to say. I’m doing something I love now, and my boss has been in the business for 20 years and his business pulls in 5 mil a year so like.......... I could stand to keep doing this for a long time. Honestly I’ve never had a direction in life so now that I found an occupation that I love I think this might be my dream job. 

15) Do You Want To Get Married? No lmao marriage is a patriarchal social construct and what’s the point? To legally be able to call someone mine? I don’t like people enough to want to spend my entire life with one. 

16) Do You Want To Have Kids? I never in my life want to give birth to a child. That shit is not for me. I have 5 nieces and nephews, a pregnant sister, and another sister who plans on having at least 2 someday. I don’t need no babies. I’ll be the cool vodka aunt who encourages my trash siblings’ kids to follow their hearts and encourages them to be gay if they’re feeling gay. I have always liked the idea of waiting until I’m like 40-45 and rich, and adopting a 10-12 y/o kid bc those kids never get adopted and I’ll just be the best parent to them. 

17) How Many Countries Have You Visited? I’ve never left the United States lmao. Fuck me right???????????????/

I have finished 3 bottles of beer/beer-like substance while writing this and the Rangers just fuckin lost go figure. I want @gingeronastick and @chrisarchers to do this and also whoever else feels like it ok ily babes

[heartbreakfiend]

Peace and Serenity

I finally achieved something I had thought I lost forever or would only come by in short glimpses and phases ..... For a while now maybe past couple years my anxiety and depression infected me so harshly that I wasn’t proud of who I’m or who I was becoming I mainly started to look for peace comfort and most of all happiness in people that would eventually just leave or tell me directly or in directly I wasn’t good enough and which sometimes led me to sleep w countless of women who were jus or more attractive just to make me fill that void again and feel something ironically one day remember it like it was yesterday change my mindset to stop letting people rent space time and energy in my mind w/o paying for it .... So many times people have told me they love me when they didn’t have a ounce of loyalty of even show real love I guess it’s easier to say than mean it these days I’m a culprit of this as well told countless of women that I love them when deep down I didn’t or didn’t even know all bc I had ulterior motives ... For a while I’ve been focusing on me and myself making money my only objective and jus being healthy both physically and mentally... it’s funny how God works I swear :) only he can see you doing well and try and multiply you’re blessings I found this girl who is the epitome and manifestation of a dream in fact it’s weird how comfortable I feel around her it shouldn’t be this natural I don’t have to pander or pretend to be into things I’m not or be fake interested in her day to day or her friends like everyone else b4 her it’s all genuine different from this entire “fake feminist” movement going on in society rn I respect the actual movement just not the pretentious women who cling on to a stupid notion and contradict themselves every day when they listen to the very same music that they claim offends them and they find misogynistic I guess as long it’s melodic and compressed w reverb “fuck that bitch or stupid hoe “ is less offensive haha anyways she’s non of that she’s just so comfortable in herself and I’m so infatuated by that ... she comes to my loft in NoHo around 7 every morning w is like 30 mins in the opposite direction from he university which is 10 min away from her house just to surprise me w breakfast and kick it for a hour b4 her class so many times I’ve gotten her so high she doesn’t even end up going to class that’s dedication if anyone has ever been thru LA traffic you know how special that kind of energy is she brings out the good in me makes me better everyday and I love that about her ... The fact she loves sports music tech movies art fashion and video games all the weird shit I’m into she is as well and it’s not forced like I tested how real she really studies this Shit like I do historian I say all this just to say I’m so happy to have in her my life and I don’t feel pressure to put a title on it or anything we’re exclusive she made it clear b4 our first time and I wouldn’t ever want to disrespect her or lose her I don’t feel to show her off to the world on social media for anyone else’s approval or to chase likes it’s surreal like she’s not like every girl asking me why won’t u post me she’s secure in her self and sometimes catches me slipping and I end up on her snap sleeping w a heart emoji and when I see that I kinda smile makes me realize how special she really is .... so I say that to end it with this work on yourself really work on yourself God will see the effort and reward you with somebody who wants the same things in life as you and is on the same wave length ... NEVER I REPEAT NEVER EVER FORCE ANYBODY TO BE IN YOUR LIFE WHO don’t want to be or respects your time. Lastly I fell victim to this don’t continue to comfort encourage and show genuine affection to someone who show you that your not that your not worth there effort and time bc they’ll never change there mind you’ll continue running in place for no reason Me personally Looking back is no longer a option I refuse to force myself on anyone ever again moving forward