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mcdonaldsnumberone · 6 months ago

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WALTZ OF THE FLOWERS!

you're relearning how to find the magic in the trivial, and sam decides to show you the charm in simplicity: with a few flowers, a date, and a promise.

gender neutral reader

twisted fart june bride event 1: rings | "do you want to attend a wedding? it'll be our wedding but don't sweat the small stuff."

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“Are you sure you don’t want to go inside? We don’t have to stay out if it’s messing with your nose this badly… I don’t want this to hurt you or anything.”

Sam shook his head defiantly, and you bit back a defeated smile as he rummaged through his pockets to bring out a was of crumpled napkins before heartily blowing his irritated, red nose into them. Splayed out in his lap was an assortment of wildflowers that the two of you had collected, running around the fields surrounding Pelican Town and gathering up different blooms of varying sizes and colors.

It felt nice to soak up some sun and spend some quality time with your boyfriend. Between helping around the house, managing his newly returned father, and cleaning up after whatever mischief Vincent got into, you didn’t want to burden Sam with too much else. He would always accept you with open arms and a bright smile, but you knew he had a lot on his plate that he wasn’t showing. Still, you hoped a quick outing like this might help take his mind off of things and let him act more like the young man he was.

“My allergies are fine,” he vehemently insisted. He flashed a sunny smile at you as if to insist that he was truly okay, even if you weren’t fully convinced. But you weren’t going to press on it too much, not when he looked so proud of all the flowers he had gathered and was now messing around with. “Besides, I don’t want to head back just yet. I like spending time with you. I like it when we’re alone and not with anyone else.”

The blond paused for a second before stealing a shy glimpse at you. “…Do you think that makes me selfish?”

You blinked at him, your fingers brushing over the flower petals that you had harvested. “Selfish? What do you mean by that?”

You watched with slight intrigue as he stumbled over his words, his normally confident voice wavering a hint. A light flush kissed his cheeks, and his face slowly turned to the same cherry pink hue as the flowers his hands had been fiddling with.

“Well…,” he trailed off slightly, and he found himself suddently unable to look you directly in the eye like he normally would, “It’s like I said. I like spending time alone with you, y’know? Just the two of us and no one else. I guess I like knowing that I’m the only who has your attention when we’re like this.”

He pressed his lips together, overcome with a wave of uncharacteristic shyness. You let out a soft laugh at the sight of your boyfriend practically squirming in his seat after confessing that he wanted to hog you all for himself. It was hard not to be charmed by him, especially when you knew how much he wanted and was honest with you, with how unsparing he was with his affections, constantly vying for your attention and doing whatever he could to brighten your day.

You smiled, and you leaned over to rest your head on his shoulder. “If I said yes, would it make you get all worked up like this? You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

Sam stared at you with his eyes blown open wide, and the innocent flush that had spread all over his face was creeping down to even his neck. He smacked at you playfully, and you let out a loud laugh as he tried to hide his face in his hands, only to stuff his nose into the handful of flowers he had been holding and then melting into a pile of rushed sneezes.

“You’re- You’re the worst!” He sniffled, hastily blinking past the tears in his swollen eyes to see you basically collapsed on the floor in a fit of your own laughter. “Here I was thinking I could be smooth with you! You never let me win!”

“You should know better than to think that you could actually win in the flirting department.” You watched him go back to shyly fiddling with the flowers, fingers moving to deftly weave the long stems into pretty knots and thick strands. “I’m the one that practically chased you around town trying to win you over! All you did was stand there and look pretty.”

He pretended to pout. “Saying it like that makes you sound like a creep stalker.”

“Who’s to say I’m not?” You prodded him with your elbow, and he deepened his pout. You could tell that he was more engrossed in whatever he was doing to the flowers than he was at grilling you as part of some halfway revenge for winning over him. Your eyes softened when you saw how gently he was touching the delicate flowers, transforming the soft petals and stringy stems into something special.

A comfortable silence settled between the two of you, and you took the opportunity to soak up the moment. Every part of this quaint date felt like something straight out of a coming of age movie, despite its undeniable simplicity. There really was nothing extraordinary about life in Stardew Valley, and yet every second you shared with Sam pulled at something so deep and fundamental in your heart that you couldn’t find the right words to describe it in a way that would do it justice.

But that was what love was, you supposed. It was listening in a field of flowers, admiring the way the casual breeze tiptoed through the reeds, the constantly babbling brook murmuring to you like a newborn infant. Somewhere in the distance, you could make out the faint sound of birdsong to accompany the pleasant weather and the rightful fluttering of wings.

These were all things you’d never even stop to appreciate or even notice in the first place, had you not made the life you have now. You would have lost sight of the important things a long time ago without your present day in Stardew Valley, and you didn’t even want to think about what you might have become had you never met and fallen in love with Sam.

“Ta-da!” Sam proudly announced, shaking you out of your momentarily solemn reflection. He stuck his creation in your face, more or less waggling it in front of your eyes excitedly so that you couldn’t miss whatever he had been working on. You blinked, instinctively craning your head back slightly, but quickly had your surprise melt into fondness when you noticed the finely crafted shape of flowers and tweed bent into the shape of a ring.

“It’s for you!” Sam insisted. His eyes were practically sparkling with a spring-like vigor, and you swore that if Sam had been born as a puppy dog instead of a man, his tail would have fallen off by now from how hard it would have been wagging. “Pretty nice, isn’t it? I know I’m not the most graceful guy in town, but I’ve been practicing doing more delicate craft these days. I think between doing stuff like this and practicing my instruments, I’ve become pretty good with my hands!”

You stared at it a bit longer. The various petals seemed to blend into one another to form a beautiful swath of color, interweaving through the smooth stems and carefully patterned leaves. It was such a simple, homely gesture but at the same time, you could see how much work and care Sam must have put into picking out the best flowers and weaving them together this coherently. And judging from his words, he must have put his all into making sure his handicraft was worth your while.

Your heart softened. “Sam…”

“Here, give me your hand!” The blond reached towards you, and you let a tender smile grace your lips as he took your fingers in his. It was as if sparks were flying up your skin and all over your body when his body brushed up against yours, and you held your breath as he gingerly slipped the flower ring over your knuckles and down securely onto the base of your ring finger.

Just like earlier, you let your gaze fall to the ring again. It caught the sunlight better than any pricey gemstone could, your skin crowned with the fine results of Sam’s dedication. All sorts of emotions welled up inside of your chest and throat, threatening to spill over your mouth and your waterline with what could only be overwhelming affection and gratitude towards Sam for loving you unconditionally and wholly.

“It’s beautiful,” you breathed. “Thank you, Sam.”

He beamed at you, eyes crinkling up. You were probably the only person in the world who would notice all of his small and obvious details, and you loved him for everything he was and had and would be. Who else in the world would do something this sweet for you? He loved you without any inhibitions or fear.

He wrapped your hands in his, and he pulled himself even closer to you until you two were sitting side-by-side with one another, his form flush against yours. “I’m glad you like it. I wanted to do something nice for you. I know I’m not a big romantic guy, and I’m not all that smooth either. I’m a far cry from the perfect man you deserve, but… I still want to try! I want to be with you for a very long time, so I have to make it worth your while.”

You leaned your head on his shoulder, and you hummed. There was something comforting about being with Sam. He was dependable, hard-working, and honest, and you knew that you would always be happy with him so long as you shared your love with him.

“You don’t have to do anything special, you know. I like you for who you are,” you remarked plainly. Your gaze fell off into the distance, into the greenery and the vast openness of nature. You two were such small, irrelevant little blips in the grand scheme of the universe, but you wouldn’t trade anything in this plane of existence for what you had with Sam.

He grinned, looking proudly at the flower ring nestled snugly on your finger. He liked the way it looked, even more than he might have once dreamt of, and he wished he could keep this image in his head forever.

“But you’re special,” he reiterated. “And that makes me want to treat you that way. We’re only young once, so I think that means we should do all sorts of dumb and stupid and special things together. Though, I suppose we can also do that when we’re old and gray as well.”

You glanced up at him. “When we’re old and gray too, huh? Looks like we’ll be with each other for the long run then.”

“Well, did you expect anything else?” He nudged you as if to scold you, and you simply replied by giving him a happy giggle. You clung to him, knowing that he was your whole world. There simply wasn’t anybody else that could make your heart sing so effortlessly or light up every single one of your days. Had you been any younger, any more foolish, any more snuffed out by the treachery of what you believed was the entirety of life, you might never have had a chance like this.

But as you sat in the big, wide flower field, enjoying Sam’s presence and the warmth of the afternoon sun, you held your hand out to admire the ring atop your finger. The ring itself might wilt after a few hours and be nothing more than a sweet gesture for the time being, but you took all of Sam’s hopeful promises of happiness and a fulfilling lifetime with one another and engraved it deeply into each and every crevice of your heart.

And you instinctively knew, such a thing could only be the prologue to a bright and merry future together.

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#stardew valley #sdv #stardew valley x reader #sdv x reader #stardew valley sam #sdv sam #x reader #my writing

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heliosthegriffin · 4 years ago

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Arc-Acres: One 1/?

If there was one place in the world that Arthur Arc could say he felt safe after a long trip hunting, and comfortable in raising his many children, it would definitely be his home, though his father’s old farm was a very close second, may the old codger rest in peace.

It wasn’t too far away from Ansel, around thirty or so miles away, sitting a mile or so outside of the settlement of Pelican Town, a odd name for the town if not for the incredible number of birds.

He had grown up there during youth, after his father decided to move out of city when the Faunas started getting....

And way, he didn’t regret his youth spent out there, he still had some, well not friends there anymore he had spent far too much time away there for him to still be friends, but well acquaintances that he wouldn’t mind catch up with.

Which brought himself to his sunny boy’s room, he hardly got to spend time with his youngest for one reason or another, but he was presented with an unprecedented chance to connect with his son over the next three weeks.

Summer break had started and schools would be closed for the next couple months, his beloved wife and daughters had decided to visit Saphron and Terra along with some other distant relatives in Argus on a girls only trip, and leaving Arthur and Jaune alone for the rest of the month.

Arthur would not let the chance escape him, He liked to think of himself as fairly progressive, but Arthur didn’t like how much his son was taking after his wife and daughters, the dance lessons, gossip circles, and, ugh, dresses they put on him when he wasn’t around couldn’t be helping his boy out in the masculity department, and he had it on very good authority as the boys father that he wanted to be a manly man like himself.

So, Arthur had devised a devious plan the Dark Brother himself would be proud of! The next three weeks... Arthur would take his Sunny Boy camping, fishing, and roughin it in the wilderness around his dad’s old farm! It was fool proof!

His son would learn how to be a manly man, learn how to rough it in the woods, fend for himself, and hopefully, hopefully, learn to say no to be put in dresses!

Hehehehe, Arthur you, evil, evil genius!

He knocked on his son’s door with heavy, calloused hands. The sound echoing loud and clearly across his house’s hallways, there was no doubt that his son heard him.

“Jaune? You in there?”

Arthur honed ears stumbling from the inside of the room, along with something heavy falling on the floor. Likely his son, the boy could dance a mean dance, but he had two left feet more often than not.

“Coming!” His boy answered, his voice that awkward in between a boy and man, coming out shrill and high, but also noticeably deeper than it had been when Arthur last left for his trip.

Arthur tried his best to respect his son’s privacy, he got it invaded enough by his daughter, so he always made sure to let his Sunny Boy open the door.

The door opened into the room, his sun opening it with a smile.

“Welcome to Casa de Jaune!”

Arthur stifled a laugh and entered his son’s room. It was a little messy, but no more so than any of his daughters, a few clothes scattered around and some book and comics left out, but he didn’t expect it to shine either.

Arthur took a load off and sat down on the foot of his son’s bed, Jaune looked nevous as he did so, but he too took a seat on a chair he had in his room.

“Soo, Dad what brings you around?” His son said clearly nervous about something.

“Oh, you know just a father wanting to hang out with his son for a moment, maybe ask him a couple questions.”

His son seemed to go pale at that.

Arthur could practically see his son’s mouth go dry.

“Uh, uh, about what?” His son’s voice cracked.

Suddenly Arthur very much felt like an interrogator.

Did walk in during a private moment? He was around that age wasn’t he? 13 or 14, wait he was 13 and would be turning 14 in august. So, he was around the age where he might be surfing on websites that his mother would be mad about.

A sly grin on Arthur's face appeared.

He leaned his head to the side and tried to peer at his son’s computer. Tsk, no luck, no suspicious browsers open, besides a couple scroll tube video’s about... Hunter training? Why, he would find any good result on there beside how to get in shape, most, well actually all hunter kept their training a mystery besides the basis of basic in order to avoid their weakness or deficits from be known. All hunter tried to have as unique a style as possible in order to avoid predictability.

Was that a video on swordplay?

Arthur’s hand glided behind himself, his senses noticing a suspicious weight on his son’s bed under the blankets.

His son tensed up as Arthur pulled out a wooden training sword, a cheap one two made of plywood.

Arthur choose to say nothing, it was an open secret what his sunny boy what to do for a living, a profession neither his mother, or sister approved of, one that if he supported would earn himself a noose around his balls and tossed off a tree, his wife's words not his.

He put the sword on his lap, and looked at his son who seemed both ashamed and embarrassed, Arthur took a deep breath and smiled.

“Ok, this is not what I wanted to talk about. Sooo, let’s move on, if you want to talk about it later that’s fine. We good?” He had never seen his son nod so fast. “So, here’s what I want to talk about.”

“I want us guys, to go have a men’s week or two out,” That was a lie, it would be most of a month, he just hadn’t thought of a better way to phrase it. “I’m been thinking you and me don’t spend enough time together, so we need to have some father-son bonding. What do you think?” Also he already decided it, he wasn’t giving his son a choice.

Jaune’s face let up at the prospect.

“I think it sounds great! What are we going to do?”

Arthur explained to Jaune what he planned, with his son seemingly more excited at the survival element of it, but looked kinda bored at fishing and more mundane elements he talked about. Though the excitement never entirely left his son’s eyes.

“When are we leaving?” Jaune said jumping in his seat.

“Well, tomorrow if you’re up for it. If not, well leave the day after tomorrow on Friday.”

“I’m ready to leave tonight!”

“Heh, a little too soon Jaune. You got to pack, and so I, then we need to pack it into the truck.” “Oh, yeah. By, the way what do mom and the sisters think about it?”

Arthur went silent.

“You’re going tell them right?” “So, you’ll probably want to take this too.” Arthur said handing his son the practice sword, a hungry glint in his son’s eyes now. His son holding the wooden blade possessively.

“Yeah, I will. And you’re mother will definitely love to hear that we’re fixing up the old cabin, but couldn’t due to weather, right?” “Yeah, it really sucks, right? Can’t believe the way back got blocked so we spent all our time visiting your friend in Patch.” “Yep, then we came home and started cleaning up the house, right?”

“Uh-huh, yep, mom is really going to appreciate some lemon-squares.”

“Making a barbecue should help her after all the air trips, too.”

“So, I better get packing.” “Me too.”

Arthur turned around one last time before leaving the room.

“Make sure to pack clothes that breathe, shorts, and couple work clothes. I think it wouldn’t hurt to actually fix up the cabin a little, if a storm actually does blow in.

“Can do!”

Arthur chuckled and left his son to pack.

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AN: End of Part One. I’ve been wanting to write this story for a while. Buckle in children, we’re going for a ride.

Also the first couple parts, and chapter or two will be mostly from Arthur’s perpective, mostly so we can speed through the prologueish area and get to Jaune doing stuff. This first chapter or two will be Jaune learning the basic skills he need for the fix, so when he does something it doesn’t come out of nowhere, and it’s an excuse to portray Jaune’s dad as something other than unsupportive.

#Jaune Arc #Jaune's Dad #Farmer Jaune #Stardew Valley Crossover #RWBY #Slowburn

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phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess · 3 years ago

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if you have a question about aussie slang, for a fic or whatevs, please just ask i don't know all of it, but we do have some fun words and sayings that are day to day statements

esp. the more rural you go

not everyone has the full accent though, because you do get a lot of pressure at work to come across... professional or whatever.

the only one i've never been sure of being an Actual Phrase, or if it Became A Phrase after popularisation on a tv show, is "Stone the Flaming Crows" bc a dude from Neighbours used to say it frequently.

examples of day to day stuff i can think of right now

mad as a frog in a sock (angry about something, went off, off the shits)

mad as a cut snake (usually means 'they're nuts', but can also mean they exploded with anger, usually contextual)

she'll be right (it's fine - can be a flippant statement, can be reassurance, etc)

drongo / galah - (idiot, not very smart, wanker, etc)

dunny = toilet

thunderbox/outhouse / long-drop - usually outdoor toilet

dry as a nun's nasty / dry as a dead dingo's donger (I am thirsty, or It Is Hot AF/we need rain so bad)

chuck a u-ey (do a u-turn)

Oi! (Hey I want your attention/i was surprised, general exclamation, stop that, you are in a lot of fucking trouble mate - depends on the tone of voice and volume) like "OI!" says aunty ruth has just found her dentures in jello and she knows you did it, etc

Bugger off (go away, or sometimes a statement of disbelief)

Yeah nah /Nah yeah (can mean yes, no or maybe depending on what was said directly before the statement)

you cant pull the wool over my eyes - you can't lie to me like that / i can see you are not telling the truth

shut your gob / put a sock in it / put a cork in it - (shut up / shut the FUCK up / close your mouth or i will shut it for you) depends on tone

Ya wally (you idiot)

Roo = kangaroo

o = can be affixed to anything to shorten it at the servo - gone to the service station, arvo - afternoon, smoko - morning tea, bottlo - where the grog is

goon/goonsack - wine in a box

grog - alcohol

stubbie - beer, ususally

boardies - board shorts

rashie - swimming shirt,

slip, slop, slap - ancient proverb for avoiding sunburn. singing pelican.

thongs - footwear

sheila = female / woman, don't hear this a lot at the moment tbh except in certain contexts or from specific people

'Getting rowdy' = things are heating up, people are riled up, a fight is about to/has just broken out, etc.

DJ's like a mad cunt = one very specific meme about a bad PM we had like 10 years ago. i can't tell you how many PM's ago, it's been game of thrones here lmao

Beyond the black stump / Out whoop-whoop / references to timbuktu (quite a distance away)

strewth!/crickey!/bloody hell - (exclamation of surprise, expletive replacement, etc)

flat out like a lizard drinking (tired / drunk / exhausted / sleeping)

pull a harry holt - (I've heard a dozens variations of this one, it means Go Missing / Disappear, often used as a joke. PM Holt went swimming one day and disappeared)

have a stickybeak (to poke your nose in/investigate/look around)

chuck a wobbly/throw a tanty/chuck a tanty/throw a wobbly (throw a tantrum, i have legit never seen anyone successfully deescalate a situation by telling someone not to chuck a wobbly or throw a tanty, go figure lmao)

bogan - (very specific kind of low-income, generally white, people. sort of like rednecks, but with more stereotypical aussie features like a mullet, singlet tops, sunnies, stubbies, etc. tend to fall under the liberal party ideology - who are our republicans... )

ankle-biters / rugrats / little takkers / gremlins / nippers - (kids, usually the littler ones)

tiff - argument, small fight (had a tiff, had a row)

pav = pavlova

piss/whizz/take a piss = going to pee

vegemite - delicious

Kiwi = New Zealander

Banana benders - the disrespectful bs that apparently other states call anyone living in Queensland, the wankers

station - farming areas that have sheep or livestock usually, have farmhands etc.

dole bludger(s) - (anyone on Centrelink, whether they want to be or not, with no other employment. but like, a lot of people on centrelink have a job that does not cover enough and need additional financial supports to meet a minimum wage, or are students or apprentices, etc. there are people who go on centrelink on and off to avoid engaging in the jobseeking stuff, they are the real dole bludgers, but a lot of richer people tend to call anyone on 'welfare' bludgers)

don't you come the raw prawn with me - (do not lie to me / don't try that shit with me, mate / I wasn't born yesterday /etc)

dak/dack - to dack someone is to come up behind them and yank their pants down (or skirts). Often taking out your boxers, too.)

budgie smugglers - (speedoes, male swimwear)

togs/toggs or cozzie (swimwear, any kind. cozzie = costume)

mozzie - (mosquito)

better than a kick up the backside /better than a kick in the arse - (pretty self explanatory, one of those phrases parents use to get slightly hurt kids to start laughing and/or coworkers to commisserate about new work rules, etc)

I wouldn't piss on (name) if they were on fire - (self-explanatory, you hate them, or they're a useless tit or an insufferable person /a suckup etc, and you would gladly hand them a match)

one for the road = getting a drink for the road, usually. can also make a joke of it like, "one last piss for the road" = I'm going to the bathroom before I leave

here's your handbag, what's your hurry - probs not an aussie phrase but a common joke in my family

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So like, there's some words and items from Australian Indigenous culture that often get used wrong in stereotypical characters, like saying 'gone walkabout', using 'cooee', making digeridoo jokes, and making some really uncomfy 'savages' statements can be very disrespectful. You might want to go looking into Australia's fucked up policies and historical (and only recent) situations before starting any arguments about this stuff... in many ways it mirrors the cruelty of american colonisers to native american peoples, etc.

Avoid some phrases. Your character gone to cool their head? He's gone off on to soak his head, or he's on his bike (gone away) but he'll be back... You can use 'Oi, dickhead!'

Please don't mock the names of towns or places, they are often the names from the traditional custodians and inhabitants.

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Random things:

We drive on the left side of the road, driver's side reversed.

More of our cars are automatic than manual. Utes aren't atypical, but bigger vehicles are out in rural areas because more than a few of the rural roads are poorly maintained or dirt, with potholes that yoyo your soul into your body.

If you have a character on a long drive on a non-highway, or rural road: +if you are on a one-lane road and someone is comingthe other way, you both move half-on, half-off; for big vehicles or trucks, you can choose to pull off completely and stop. Just for safety, esp. in rain, fog, mist or late at night. +at one-lane bridges, you have a give way sign on one side. if you want your characters to have a moment of 'pause to look at each other while driving' or 'a quiet moment of reflection', have them wait for another car or truck to pass from the other side. These can be a few metres long, to like, a really long bridge. +They may pass markers that say 'flood level marker' with numbers of 2, 3 or 5 metres. Could be useful to remark on if your fic needs a reason for them to have a crisis. +Bushfire warning signs (from Low to Catastrophic) are frequent +Animal Crossing signs are very frequent, and often have a wildlife rescue number on them +Water restriction signs are in most small towns, they range from levels 1 to 6. This can change what the characters are allowed to do with water in little towns, etc. +You may occasionally find a small servo and one or two houses. +pubs don't open/won't serve alcohol until after 10am. the joke has always been, 'beer on your cornflakes' but you will never be able to actually get that unless you preplanned the night before in your hotel room. +Around dawn and dusk, a lot of animals like hares, kangaroos, wallabies, sometimes echidnas and koalas and little numbat things, and snakes and bushmice will be close to the road. Sometimes dashing across. They do not react logically to cars approaching, and will leap out at random. Hares do this zigzag nonsense. If you need the character to hit the brakes frantically, or swerve, this is a good reason. If you are ever driving here and see an animal on the side of the road, flip lights to low beam, slow down and watch to see how they react. If you can. If there's a truck blaring down on you, you may not be able to.

+Emus are in more rural areas. Echidnas sometimes appear on fringes of towns though.

+Kookaburras are a lovely creature, I have rescued a few and they are nice... but their laugh is very grating when it goes off super early in the morning. They eat snakes (good) and baby birds (not so good).

+Lots of snakes round here. LOTS. Carpet Snakes are pretty common, red-belly black snakes, eastern brown (big danger!!!), whip snakes have declined in my region, keelback snakes, this one black and white banded one we found deceased, etc. Snakes can climb, snakes can SWIM. Putting something that stinks around a campsite MAY help, but not always.

+Never go swimming in a dam you don't own, and that hasn't been checked, and if no one knows where you are. How deep is it? What's on the bottom? How stirred is the water? etc.

+Kangaroos CAN drown you. They have perfected this attack, and will do it to humans, dogs and other pursuers alike. They can also eviscerate you with their hind paws or shatter your ribs with a kick. The 'boxing' they do is exceptionally violent. This seems to surprise people, but like, giraffes can kill each other by slamming their heads into each other, you think a 7 ft swole motherfucking cryptid can't do harm? They can be lovely tho, if they trust you. But DO NOT GO PETTING WILDLIFE.

+Dropbears, austrilanicus vericanthus bitus, are real. We do make jokes about them, but they are a Problem. The pee on yourself thing won't ward them off, that's more about working out which tourists are the most gullible (and if they run with it, the moistest) lmao. Akubras and other thicker-layered headwear,

+We have wild dogs and feral pigs. Do not fuck with the feral pigs, some are HUGE, and no... they're not just pigs who escaped farms, these are MASSIVE motherfuckers who will Get You if they See You. Rustling in the night outside the tent? Good Luck.

+Koalas should not be picked up directly. They have claws, and a lot of them have chamydia. I mean if a character saves one in a fic that's fine I guess, but like... someone's getting antibiotics after that lmao. They are bigger than you think, dumber than you think, and sometimes they have to be chased across a highway with a windscreen cover bc they're not very bright and keep failing to climb metal fences, lmaoooo

+Towns of about 20-30k will have more shops (some franchise, some local owned), servos, fast food places and usually at least two to three shopping centres. Usually small level entertainments like a cinema, or local groups. +Towns with 10-20k, may have one or two major shopping centres, servos (tracks and RVs catered to), possibly a maccas, and the majority of stores will be local-owned. May have a cinema, but not one that has the newest releases. Local council may have more festivals, or 'that one thing they're known for'. +0-10k towns have a small local store, prices usually a bit higher. A servo, often with capacity for trucks. Local festivals. Characters can cop a bit of side-eye in these places, esp. if they don't fit the traditional ideas or are loud/violently american. +Grey nomads are a thing. Old people with fancy caravans who drive So Slow, and move all around aus. Several refused to stop during covid and it was like, WHO DO YOU THNK WE'RE TRYING TO KEEP ALIVE BY STOPPING YOU MOVING THROUGH MULTIPLE TOWNS???

+Some rural areas have legit red dirt, its always super cool to look at. Some places have light brown to dark brown, some have more chalky colours or yellowish dirt. Depends.

+Reminder: Australia has very specific gun laws, if your character/s have weapons then they may need to be sneaky or store them specifically in the vehicle. Although if you're talking about like, mad max type rules, then who cares. But if you have them get into a gun fight in a town, the police will come, etc.

Dunno, just ask if you have a question... just trying to think of random things to paint a picture if you have a character over here for a roadtrip or mission or whatever.

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britishassistant · 4 years ago

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Bahahaha I found out why the Grandline placed the portal where it did. The strawhats JUST got done rescuing Robin and on is on their merry way to Thriller Bark on the Sunny. Well let me back up a bit first. Mayu decided to wait on the Flag by asking who's Captain which turns out to be Naruto apparently only he and Sasuke wanted to be but given that Naruto wants to be Kage and Sasuke his second they just kinda fell into place. (Part 1)

With Naruto as captain and Sasuke as first mate, which apparently Mayu thought was funny because she just started LAUGHING no idea what was going through her head because the dream at that point was from Sakura's perspective at the time who was mostly just confused, Mayu then calms down enough to explain that its hilarious because their behavior just now was so like Luffy and Zoro, and she's just so happy for her friends to be here with her that she couldn't help it (Part 2)

Mayu then asks if there was anything different about her laugh, and when told no she was slightly disappointed. (I think we both know why she wants a One Piece laugh.) Then she asks Naruto cuz he's captain any ideas on what to name them. Which Naruto says no ideas except it can't have anything to do with the village, because he's got a bad feeling when he thinks with that (why would naruto get a bad feeling?) (Part 3)

Mayu thinks a bit and Says "how about Whirlpool? Like your clan name and its original home? Uzu was Konoha's sister Village after all and its deserves to be remembered! And we can use your Clan symbol as the flag! It be a bit simple but the symbol on the skull would be quite easy to do" (let it be known that Mayu is not very creative and is taking far too much inspiration from the Strawhats flag but hay it works) (part 4)

but anyway they argue a bit on weather or not add either other clans symbols or Konoha's, though the only other change they end up making is instead off a human skull its a pelican skull much to Mayu's embarrassment and secret joy, cuz in her friends words they wouldn't be doing this thing w/o her so she needs some representing, and they head to Loguetown where they spilt Sakura, Sasuke, and Ino going to exchange some gold for shopping (Part 5)

Sakura because she is in charge of the seals with the money and Gold (and future Treasure), Ino because she need to buy a few Log Poses (One main and a few back ups just in case), Sasuke because he finally wants to try to get a newspaper to try to pin down when they are with Mayu's help, they run into issues with language and go back to grab Mayu who whines that they wanted to go see the place Luffy was nearly killed at but helps anyway because well English (part 6 I think)

Sakura apparently can haggle with the best of them and get some really good prices on some of the jewelry Kakashi sent along to help jump start their adventure which more then covered the log poses and the newspaper which was handed to Mayu to translate, which in big letters on the front page talks about the Strawhats storming Enies Lobby a few weeks ago which makes Mayu both Panic and Excited. Excited because its before Marineford so the group can help go save Ace (part 7)

Panic because Teach Has Ace by now and Ace is likely already in Marine custody or on his way to be and none of them can pull a jail break right now, AND SHE DOESN'T WANT LUFFY TO LOSE HIS LAST BROTHER! (she doesn't know about Sabo being alive just with Memory loss yet) she calms down eventually and get the others to promise to Actually learn english from her like she has been trying for ages, since they need it, and quickly goes see the burned down execution platform before heading back (part 9)

Because she wants to bug Naruto with heading to the Grandline sooner then planned because she wants the group to be in a position to help Luffy, and while she has no clue how to get to Impel Down, Marineford is quite easy to find on the grandline and They're mostly ninja's and sneaking into places is what they do, they definitely need to get an Eternal Log pose to Marineford though first, she knows how to convince Naruto though so she isn't worried, and I woke up because dog again (part 10)

Mayu was definitely being a schemer there then again Marineford broke every fan's heart along with Luffy's and is DEFFENTLY not something Mayu would want Luffy to go though like at all. Mayu would likely hate herself forever if she didn't at least try to save Ace.

Whirlpool Pirates for the win!!

Now I’m just picturing them introducing themselves and some pirate/marine going “so are you lot behind the weird whirlpool portal then?” and them going 👀 👀 excuse me wHAT—

Sasuke used to insist he never needed to learn English because Mayu would always be there to translate it.

He gets left in the middle of town to learn his lesson, and somehow ends up with armfuls of papayas and one (1) grapefruit. Even he doesn’t know how that happened.

I feel like Mayu, while wanting to save Ace for Luffy, would also be a bit wary about sneaking in simply because Marineford has the strongest marines in the world guarding it, and if they get caught up in the Whitebeard War they’ll be running around between the most powerful fighters while they’re dunking it out.

Even if they are post 4th Ninja War, the Three Admirals are nothing to take lightly, to say nothing of Blackbeard and his crew.

Thank you for sharing again!!

#but i like one piece #one piece #naruto #marineford arc #whitebeard pirates #uzushio #naruto uzumaki #sasuke uchiha #ino yamanaka #sakura haruno #konoha 12 #roronoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #one piece luffy #one piece zoro #ace one piece #portgas d. ace #straw hat pirates

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chain-unchained · 5 years ago

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October 12 - Part 1

The thing about fall, especially in the valley, was that the weather tended to be unpredictable. In the span of an hour, it could go from being pleasantly sunny, to an icy downpour, to overcast, then back to dazzling sun. It wasn’t so bad if you happened to be inside where it was warm and dry; if you were unlucky enough to be out and about when the weather began to change, though…

“Wow, it’s really coming down out there.” Emily commented from the couch in the living room of the house she shared with Haley, pulling back the curtains on the window to watch the rain come down in heavy sheets. “That’s just fall in the valley for you. It’s too bad it’s so cold out, I wouldn’t mind a thunderstorm.”

“I would.” Haley shot her sister a scathing look from the crafting nook they’d set up in a corner of the kitchen. “Humidity makes my hair frizz, so that’s a hard pass from me.”

“Aw, come on.” Emily shifted to rest her arms on the back of the couch, content to watch the raindrops race one another down the window. “You don’t enjoy them even a little? The sound of the rain on the roof is so peaceful…”

“Would you can it? I’m trying to do something here.” There was a good deal of pent up exasperation behind Haley’s voice; giving Emily another reproachful look, she turned her attention back to the infernal sewing machine sitting before her. “This outfit’s gotta turn out perfect, or else I can kiss that full ride scholarship good-bye.”

Emily hid the smile that came onto her face; she was used to dealing with Haley’s standoffish behavior, so it was nothing new for her to be told off like that. She knew the reason why her sister was so on edge as well, so she didn’t mind acquiescing and just quietly enjoying the storm. “…. Hm?”

She sat up a little and pulled the curtains back more as movement outside caught her eye; there, running down the street towards the Cindersap forest, was the farmer boy, holding his bag up over his head to try and fend off the icy rain.

“What?” Haley glanced up briefly as Emily got up from the couch. “Oh Yoba, don’t tell me you spotted another bird. We’re not keeping it.”

Without giving an answer, Emily hastily traipsed over to the door and threw it open. “Ashe!” She called as the petite farmer jogged past. “Here, come inside before you catch a chill!”

Ashe practically skidded to a stop on the slick pavement. “A-Are you sure?” He asked, looking a bit hesitant as he hugged himself to try and keep warm.

Nodding her head, Emily stepped aside while holding the door open; after a moment, Ashe jogged over, trying not to brush against her with his sopping wet clothes as he crossed the threshold into the house. “Th-thank you so much, Emily.”

“Hey, what are neighbors for?” Emily gave him a friendly smile as she shut the door behind them. “I’ll grab some towels and get some hot tea going, that should help warm you back up.”

It took a few minutes to brew the tea, but before long Ashe was bundled up on the couch, his nearly numb hands clutching at a cup of strong peppermint tea. “Sorry for getting your couch all wet.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’ll dry, won’t it? Anyway, you stay right here until the rain lets up, and then you march yourself right back home and take a hot bath so you don’t catch a cold.”

As Emily passed the crafting nook to go back into the kitchen, Haley snorted quietly. “That’s not even a real thing.” She grumbled, trying to focus on her work again. Every few seconds she’d glance around the sewing machine into the living room to sneak a look at Ashe, who was quietly sipping away at his tea. He was awful small for a farmer, and for a boy for that matter. Pretty sure he was about the same size as someone like Abigail, even…

Shifting to be able to look out the window, Ashe idly drummed his fingertips against the cup. ‘I hope the rain’s not too cold for the crops…’ He thought anxiously, his brow furrowed in concern at the idea of it. The pumpkins weren’t long from ripe, which was good since Spirits’ Eve was fast approaching. With any luck, he’d be able to let Jas pick out her pumpkin before opening the fields to the public..

“Hey.”

Jumping a little, Ashe turned to look at Haley, who had come to stand before him. “H-Hello, Haley.” He greeted slowly. He and Haley hadn’t really had any interaction since he moved to Pelican Town; she was always either absorbed into something like photography, or content to just ignore his dirt-covered self any time they passed.

Haley folded her arms over her chest as she gave him a hard look. “… Take off your clothes.”

The sudden demand made Ashe’s face turn a deep shade of crimson, and nearly made him spill the tea all over himself. “Oh, don’t flatter yourself, I’m not saying to get naked.” Haley scoffed with a shake of her head. “Look, you don’t want to catch a cold or whatever by staying in those wet clothes of yours, right?”

“N-No, but…” Ashe was more confused than uncomfortable at this point. “I don’t… have anything else to change into…?”

“Oh, my Yoba—” Frustrated, Haley practically shoved some dry clothes into his face. “Are you really that dense? The bathroom’s through that door there,” she pointed, “so quit asking stupid questions and go put these on!”

“Y-Yes ma’am!” Not wanting to be scolded again, Ashe hastily set the tea on the coffee table and disappeared into the bathroom. It felt incredibly awkward to him, first being invited into their home when he didn’t know either of them very well and now changing in their bathroom into…. “Um, Haley?”

“Whaaaat?” Haley’s impatient voice snapped from the other side of the door.

“Are you sure these are the clothes you meant to give me--?”

“YES! Just put them on already!”

Hearing her sister’s exasperation, Emily stepped out from the kitchen to see her waiting impatiently by the bathroom. “What are you up to?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“… Yes, actually, that’s why I asked.”

“Well, if Farmer Dork here would hurry it up, you could see.” Haley drummed her fingertips against her arm; she was never a patient girl, and it was really grinding her gears that Ashe was taking his sweet time to change.

After almost a minute, the door unlocked and began to open—“Finally,” Haley huffed—and a very meek Ashe stepped into view; no longer was he wearing the overalls and bright orange turtleneck. Emily’s jaw dropped a little at the sight of him, clad in a lilac-colored t-shirt type top hanging baggily over a long sleeved white dress shirt. Instead of pants, a pair of charcoal shorts—also baggy and oversized for his small frame—covered the upper parts of his legs, while clean white leggings pulled halfway up his thighs covered most of the rest. He looked like… a totally different person, and quite an uncomfortable, embarrassed one at that.

“Hrm….” Haley grabbed his arm and pulled him to stand in the middle of the living room, taking her time to walk circles around him and examine him from every angle; more than once she would stop, tug on a piece of the fabric, make a noise of discontent, and then resume her circular march. Out of nowhere, she let out a frustrated yell. “Yoba, this won’t win the scholarship!”

“Scholarship?” Confused, Ashe looked to her, then to Emily, who gave him a sympathetic smile and a shrug of her shoulders.

“Haley’s trying to get into a fashion design academy in Zuzu City.” She explained simply. “But it’s a pretty expensive school to get into, so she’s trying to win a full ride scholarship.”

“Yeah, and I can kiss those hopes good-bye if this is the best that I can come up with!” Haley yanked on Ashe’s sleeve, obsessing over every flaw in the fabric. “Ugh, I worked so hard on this too!”

“Is it really that bad?” Ashe looked down at himself; sure, these weren’t clothes that he would ever pick out for himself or wear while working on the farm, but they weren’t awful. “If you made these yourself, then that’s really impressive.”

Haley gave him a hard look. “… Of course you would say that. You wear denim overalls every day.” She grumbled, roughly letting go of his arm and looking away with a frustrated pout. “…. Thanks, though. I guess they don’t look so bad when you’re wearing them.”

Another idea struck her, and she whipped around to face Ashe again with her eyes glinting. “I know. I’m sure to design something amazing if I’ve got someone to model outfits on! C’mon, you’ll do that for me, right?”

“Haley, don’t be selfish.” Emily stepped in between the two and shook her head. “Ashe doesn’t have time to be a dress up doll for you.”

“Actually…. I don’t mind.”

Surprised, Emily looked over her shoulder to Ashe. “Are you sure? You don’t have to play along with her, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” Ashe nodded his head slowly. “But I want to. I think it’s wonderful that Haley wants to go to a school like that. And I want to help her. If that means that I have to dress up every so often, that’s okay.”

Rather than being elated, Haley couldn’t help but feel a little muted. She had kind of expected Ashe to just play along begrudgingly, and she’d been okay with that, but hearing him so willing to help her like that made her feel just the littlest bit of guilt. She hadn’t expected him to be so… nice.

“You’re really kind of a pushover, aren’t you?” She asked a few minutes later, as she was busy taking Ashe’s measurements; now that she had a willing participant, she needed them so that the next outfit prototype wouldn’t hang like a burlap sack on him. “I bet you don’t even know what the word ‘no’ is.”

“I do!” Ashe insisted meekly. “I just… don’t say it very often. Besides, I really do want to help you. I didn’t know that you had such a wonderful dream. But… why ask me, specifically? Why not ask someone like Emily, or Abigail, or Penny?”

“Are you kidding?” Haley crouched down to take Ashe’s leg measurements. “Like they’d ever agree to help me. I know nobody in town likes me very much. You’re pretty much the only person that would put up with me besides Emily. And there’s no way that Emily would wear anything I made, even just to model it.”

“I-I see….”

“Geez, you’re such a twig!” Making a note of his measurement, she jotted it down on the notebook by her feet. “How does someone who works on a farm have such skinny arms and legs? I’m actually kind of jealous…”

Ashe’s cheeks tinted a bit pink at the comment; to be honest, he was embarrassed about how small he was. It wasn’t like he didn’t try to put on weight, because he did. “If you don’t mind me asking… what made you want to study fashion design?”

“Well,” Haley picked up the notebook and straightened up to set it by the table where her sketchpad was, “I don’t know if you’ve realized it, but I’m not exactly the most petite person on the planet. Alex likes to tell me I’m thicc with 2 c’s, whatever that means. And it’s really frustrating sometimes to find clothes that are cute or sexy or just nice for bigger girls—if you’ve got a butt, or a big chest, or a thick waist or thighs, then there’s not much selection for you, and it’s usually fugly as hell on top of being expensive.” She sighed and leaned against the table as she folded her arms across her chest again, a frustrated frown on her face. “So I got to thinking that if no one out there is making stuff for plus sized people, then I would. And not just for the bigger girls, either—I want to make a line of clothing that caters to all shapes and sizes and gender identities. It doesn’t matter who you are, what you identify as or what your body is—” she suddenly struck a determined and triumphant pose, a fire practically burning in her eyes, “you should be able to wear nice clothes like everyone else!”

Her sudden outburst of passion caught Ashe quite off-guard. They were both strangers to one another, so he really had no idea that she had such ambition.

“So yeah.” Haley leaned back against the table again. “Of course, the fact that filling a gap in the market would bring in loads of money is a nice bonus, but more than anything, helping people feel good about themselves is my main goal. And even though I’m mostly aiming towards plus sized women,” she gave Ashe the faintest of smiles, “I appreciate that you’re helping me out here. But I’m blaming you if I don’t get into this academy, you got that?”

“Right…” Ashe half laughed at the idle threat.

“Alright then.” Glancing out the window, Haley saw that the rain had all but stopped. “Oh hey, the rain’s let up. You probably should get out of here before it picks up again.”

“Ah, really?” Ashe looked outside as well, relieved that he would be able to get home. “I’ll go change real quick—”

“Go ahead and keep those clothes, by the way.” She added as he moved towards the bathroom. “They’re nowhere near good enough to get a scholarship with, and I’m never going to wear them. Actually, do me a favor and wear them around for awhile. I want to at least see how they hold up under wear and tear.”

“You… want me to wear this around town?” Ashe looked down at himself again, his face turning red just imagining being seen by other people—let alone Shane.

“Yup. You got a problem with that?”

Catching the ‘look’ that Haley was giving him, Ashe decided it wasn’t worth the battle. “N-No, no problem.”

“Good. Now get going.” Considering their little ‘appointment’ done, Haley sat herself at the design desk and opened up her sketchpad to a blank page. It was back to square one, but she had numbers and points of references this time.

Sighing internally—he really was a giant pushover, wasn’t he?—Ashe got his wet clothes out of the bathroom and began to the front door. “Oh, before you go!” Emily called, catching his attention as she traipsed out of the kitchen with an old umbrella in hand. “I knew we had one sitting in one of our closets, so I dug it out for you. Wouldn’t want you to get caught out in the rain again, now would we?”

“Ah, thank you!” Grateful, Ashe accepted the umbrella. “I’ll make sure to return it.”

“Oh, there’s no need for that. Keep it! It’s not like we ever use it anyway.” Emily gave him a smile and a wave. “Be careful on your way home, alright?”

“I will.” Ashe clutched the umbrella against his chest and bowed his head to her. “Thank you again!”

As Emily shut the front door, Haley leaned over to watch Ashe disappear down the road through the window. “You know…” She began slowly, resting her chin on her hand as she sat back and picked up her pencil. “He’s not anything like I thought he would be.”

“What did you think he’d be like?” Emily picked up the empty tea cup from the coffee table and took it into the kitchen.

“I dunno… like you, probably. Super weird and hippie-dippie. I didn’t expect this… puffball pushover.” Tapping the tip of her pencil against the pad, Haley had a contemplative look on her face. “And what’s with that ‘I want to help you’ stuff he was spouting?”

“That’s just how Ashe is.” Emily rinsed the cup out in the sink and came to stand next to her sister’s desk. “He’s just a genuinely caring person. How else do you think he and Shane ended up together?”

“I guess.” Haley looked down to the blank page before her. “… Hey, go and get my laptop for me. I need to look up some inspo.” It was time to fill that blank page up with a fresh design.

As Ashe moved from the town proper to the boundaries of the Cindersap forest, he sneezed into his elbow; despite having been warmed up in their house, he still felt a chill deep in his bones. ‘Maybe I should have an early night tonight…’

#sdv #sdv fanfic #sdv fic #sdv shane #sdv farmer #stardew valley #stardew valley fanfic #stardew valley fic #stardew valley farmer #stardew valley shane #stardew valley haley #stardew valley emily

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timdrakesbussy · 6 months ago

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It’s Always Sunny in Pelican Town

prev (2/?)

#it’s always sunny in pelican town #stardew valley #sdv #sdv leah #sdv maru #sdv sebastian #sdv sam #sdv shane #sdv harvey #sdv alex #sdv abigail #sdv caroline #sdv pierre #sdv gus #sdv emily #sdv pam #sdv elliott

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our-sushil-us-blog · 5 years ago

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Stardew Valley: 10 Essential Tips For Fishing

Fishing is one of the harder matters to research in Stardew Valley, however these tips and hints will have you ever reeling them in. From foraging, farming to fishing, Stardew Valley has all the options a player could wish from a calming recreation. While most of these activities a reasonably simple to take care of, fishing has usually been a notoriously difficult task because of its difficult mechanics. Particularly tough for individuals who are new to the game and who've but to practice their fishing competencies properly, it may get quite frustrating trying to seize even the easiest of fish or even dream of one day catching a mythical fish. Not to worry, though, due to the fact we're here to proportion with you ten guidelines to turn you from a novice into a seasoned fisherman.

Understand The Mechanics

Learn how to fish in stardew valley The biggest difficulty many gamers discover themselves coming up towards is a pure misunderstanding of how the fishing mini-recreation genuinely works. There are two ways to move the green bar to follow the fish icon that actions up and down: slow click on and release, or continuous fast-moving clicking. The former will shoot up the bar high up quickly and can help you trap up with the short motion of the fish, and the second continues the bar at a fixed level while the fish isn't always moving. When casting the bobber, using WASD keys can even direct it left and right. Once you master this, the mini-game could be a breeze.

Early Game Spots

When you first start the sport and don't have any fishing abilities, there are two spots in which we advocate fishing: the river that runs via Pelican Town and the ocean.

These two locations may have the very best to trap fish, inclusive of the Sardine, Anchovy, Smallmouth Bass, and Sunfish. All 4 are relatively smooth to capture, with fairly predictable motion, a good way to will let you grind that early fishing skill ranges up speedy and also promote your catch for a decent fee at Willy's shop.

This is an apparent one. To get better at fishing, you want to fish greater and not get discouraged by the problem of the mini-game early on. Once you degree up, the green bar in the mini-game will make it bigger in size and make it less difficult so one can tune fish. To degree up fast, once you benefit access to the Hidden Forest you also advantage get entry to a small pond that is an exceptional manner to benefit degrees fast. Setting up crab pots whilst you feel virtually frustrated is likewise a tremendous way to get the one's ranges without clearly going through the attempt of fishing.

Invest In A Better Rod

Like all your other tools, the Bamboo Rod that you first get from Willy at the beginning of the sport can be switched for a Fiberglass Rod and then subsequently to an Iridium Rod, which is satisfactory in the game. The Fiberglass Rod lets in you to apply Bait while fishing, on the way to increase the amount of fish attracted to you and the Iridium Rod permits on pinnacle of this using a tackle, which can attract particular types and varieties of fish. This is specifically useful when you're trying to catch rare fish.

Learn Fish Behavior

Every fish in Stardew Valley is unique and the way they behave isn't the same as one another. Long before you even realize which fish you're approximately to capture, you may make a pretty educated guess surely by looking at how the fish movements on the mini-sport bar.

Some fish will dart up and down fast, even as others will pass slowly and then keep a hard and fast position. Others could have a mixture of those two and make it even more of a headache with a view to catching them. However, studying the swimming patterns of every fish and getting to know to apprehend them will assist you a lot in the long run.

Know The Right Time

Let's say you want to capture a squid. How do you discover one? It's vital to understand a few fish only seem for the duration of positive seasons and even during positive instances of the day. The elusive squid is the simplest to be had in the course of winter months at night time time. Similarly, the octopus is handiest to be had at night time time, however all through summer season months best. Weather situations can also have an effect on whether fish are available. Catfish and Shad will commonly decide on wet days, while Sunfish and Rainbow Trout decide upon to appear at some point in sunny days. Knowing when the fish you need to catch is available is truly crucial.

Be At The Right Place

Not handiest is timing essential, but location is, too. You won't find the same fish swimming in the ocean as you do within the river or inside the lake. Keep in mind that the river that starts in the mountains is known as the mountain lake, and will incorporate very special fish from those caught inside the city river or wooded area river. Once you go similarly down into the mines, you'll also come across underground ponds which will have a rarer trap, and after unlocking the desert, you will have access to extra varieties of distinctive fish.

Watch For Bubbles And Depth

Every every so often you may spot a set of bubbles and ripples in a frame of water. This indicates that the spot is wealthy with fish. Try to cast your bobber instantly into that spot and you will notice extra fish may be dashing to that area. Another accurate trick is to attempt to forged your bobber into areas inside the water that are darker in color and consequently deeper than the rest. These spots are more plentiful with fish than the rest.

Get The Trap Bobber

Speaking of tackles, there are a few options to be had in the game and they all are useful depending on what sort of fish you need to catch. However, there's one object above each different, which we really advise getting: the Trap Bobber. Once equipped, the progress bar all through the mini-sport will burn up 66% slower, making fishing so much greater forgiving for players who might war catching the ones pesky, elusive legendary fish. Keep in mind that you have to have an Iridium Rod to equip one.

Eat Fishing Boosters

The very last thing you may do to make the job simpler for yourself, especially at lower ranges of fishing, is to devour foods with the intention to momentarily bump up your fishing talents. You can buy Trout Soup from Willy's shop so that it will boost your fishing by +1 and finally as you progress through the game you'll discover benefit the recipe for Dish o' the Sea, for you to increase your fishing by +3. If you emerge as friends with Willy and benefit 3 hearts, he'll send you a recipe to Clam Chowder, that is relatively smooth to make and will enhance your fishing by

#howtofishinstardewvalley

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buttsonthebeach · 6 years ago

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PROMPT: penelope + leah, "licking your fingers clean of her."

AT LAST. We shall be a fandom of two (2) people with WLW farmers in Stardew Valley.

Obviously not Dragon Age. I do love Stardew Valley for those who didn’t know that! This will be on AO3 very very soon.

Pairing: Female Player x Leah / Penelope x Leah, Stardew Valley

Rating: Explicit! Sexy times and also cursing.

Note: Bit of a character study, some spoilers for Leah’s romance.

**************

Penelope liked facts and figures. She made a mean spreadsheet. It was what Joja Corporation hired her for. Her degree in biology was uninteresting to them. Her minute attention to detail and near obsessive need for planners and organization? That they could use. For eight hours a day. In a dimly lit cubicle. She could plan the shit out of their payroll and organize their files for new hires and -

Fuck. Just thinking about it made her feel claustrophobic all over again.

So the whole point of coming to Stardew Valley, to Grandpa’s farm, was to get away from all that.

And now she found herself sitting on the porch of her newly renovated farmhouse, her cat Jin rolling around in a sunbeam on the porch, staring at a spreadsheet of her expected yields and profits from her last fall harvest, and projections of how much she would need to mine over the winter if she wanted to a) eat b) renovate the house again and c) buy more animals to sell more animal products so she wouldn’t have to break her back all winter in the mine.

Fuck.

It was then that she heard the heavy drag of footsteps coming up the gravel path she’d laid down - the one that ran between her young cherry saplings, past the small pond, and towards Cindersnap Forest. She looked up from her laptop and shaded her eyes against the early morning sunshine. Someone was coming towards her - red hair - Leah?

Leah, who’d barely spoken a word to her at first, who she only met by chance one Friday in the Stardrop Saloon in late spring because she rarely left her cabin. Leah who tucked her hair behind her ears over and over again when she was nervous and let it fall out of its braid when she waved her hands excitedly, discussing her latest sculpture and how it conveyed the utter isolation of a crowded subway platform in Zuzu City.

Leah who seemed so unflappable until she got on the phone with Kel, her ex-girlfriend.

Leah who was scared to show off her sculptures to anyone but Penelope.

Leah.

Fuck.

Leah made Penelope’s heart speed up the way only one other person had before - Marie, her college sweetheart, the woman who abruptly broke her heart the night before they were supposed to move into their first apartment together. Which led to her taking the job at Joja to afford the place since she couldn’t get out of the lease, instead of getting her masters in microbiology the way she’d planned. Which led to her gaining twenty pounds as she binge-watched Wynonna Earp and sampled every single Ben and Jerry’s flavor they sold at her local (you guessed it) Joja Mart.

Which ultimately led to her sitting on this sunny porch worrying about eggplants and why on earth it was she wasn’t allowed to use a goddamn gun to kill the monsters in the mine (she was shit at the slingshot).

Which ultimately led to Leah, walking up the gravel path, making her heart beat the way she thought it never would again.

Leah had a statue behind her. She was dragging it on some kind of dolley behind her. It was at least as tall as she was, and brown as the corduroy pants she wore no matter the season (brown as her kind eyes). Her face was flushed with effort but she was beaming as she made her way to the house.

“I’ve got it, I’ve got it,” she assured Penelope, waving off her offer of assistance. On the porch, Jin stood and arched her back and meowed plaintively at Leah, as if she hadn’t already been pet and coddled for half an hour that morning while Penelope lay in bed.

“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?” Leah said when she reached the farmhouse, beaming despite her sweat.

“Sure is,” Penelope replied, her heart speeding up again. Leah kept right on beaming.

“I’ve got a gift for you. It’s a sculpture I’ve been working on just for you. Well, you probably figured that out. Ta-da!” She waved to the sculpture with a flourish. It was mahogany, and nearly as tall as Penelope herself. It looked like it was made of a series of loops rising organically out of the earth.

“It’s called How I Feel About Penelope,” Leah said. There she went with the tucking-the-hair-behind-the-ears. How I feel about Penelope. Leah who was so shy she had to speak through wood to make herself heard.

So what was this sculpture saying?

Penelope knew she should have taken that art history elective.

“It’s amazing,” Penelope said. “And I know exactly where it’s going to go.”

“Here, let me help!”

“Oh, it’s fine - the bedroom’s a mess -”

“Nonsense.”

The truth was that the bedroom was fine, but Penelope wasn’t sure she wanted Leah to know that that’s where she wanted the statue to go - right where she would always be able to see it when she woke. But in the end Leah didn’t seem to mind the placement at all. She praised Penelope’s choice, her feng shui, the way it went with the deep green wallpaper she’d just ordered from a catalogue.

“I like it,” Leah said just as she was getting ready to leave. “I like how you bring nature inside.”

I like you, Penelope thought, but the words wouldn’t come.

Leah left, and Penelope went back into the bedroom and stood looking at the statue - its curving, arching arms, its strength, its flexibility. How I feel about Penelope.

She went back out on the porch and closed the laptop, pushing the spreadsheet from her mind. She would be flexible. She would walk the farm and smell the soil and not stress over every cent. She would just be. Like Leah and her sculpture.

It wasn’t the last sculpture Leah would show her. Not by a long shot. They spent the rest of that fall and then a good part of the winter that followed working on sculptures for her art show, which Penelope had finally persuaded her to move forward with. It was a good distraction from the nagging feeling in the back of Penelope’s mind - that no matter how hard she worked, how many times she counted up how much food she had saved up for her livestock and frozen in the fridge for herself, she wasn’t doing enough.

“Winter is when all of nature rests and resets,” Leah told her. “You should rest and reset, too.”

But sitting around her own farmhouse only led to fidgeting and spreadsheets (what was wrong with her) and watching too many cooking shows on her TV, or taking too many pictures of Jin lolling about cutely on the floor while secretly counting and recounting how much more lumber she needed to have Robin build another barn and how quickly she could reasonably afford it because if she had another barn she could get more goats and then -

So resting and resetting became going to Leah’s house with some freshly gathered hazelnuts to roast over her fireplace, or maybe some poppyseed muffins - and then, finally, her very first batch of homemade raspberry wine. And then they’d sit there by the fire and Leah would wax poetic about the sculptures she was considering for the show, how they challenged personhood and celebrated her favorite mediums and how she left things intentionally unclear for the viewer to provoke thought. It was exactly the sort of thing Penelope used to overhear in the quad in her college days, and scoff at. How could people spend their whole lives overthinking about art to that degree?

But now she was starting to get it. Leah shaved away seemingly random scraps of wood from a large block and beauty and meaning emerged. And Penelope forgot about the exact alkalinity of her soil and whether she should plant three fields of cauliflower next season or do kale instead and get more harvests out of it or if that would deplete the nutrients -

Okay, so it didn’t make her forget completely. But Leah’s little cabin was still an oasis, and Leah was still so beautiful and smart and kind, and Penelope was hopelessly in love.

It was the kind of realization that dawned slowly over the course of their daily conversations, not something that hit her like a thunderclap. When Penelope thought back over it later, she thought the exact moment might have been when she came out of the bathroom and saw Leah looking at the window at the drifting snow, a content smile on her face. She loved Leah. She hadn’t even held her hand, and she loved her. She felt safe with her. She understood more of the world through her eyes. She loved her.

So she went to Pierre’s store and bought a bouquet of flowers - the biggest and most beautiful he had in the dead of winter - and she carried them over to Leah’s house. And she stood there on the step, holding them with trembling hands, because nothing had ever been as scary as this. Not coming out to her parents. Not sitting alone in that empty apartment after Marie left. Not quitting Joja and getting on the bus to Pelican Town. Nothing scared her as much as the idea that she, with all her facts and figures and anxieties, wouldn’t be good enough for the woman she loved.

Leah’s eyes lit up like the lights in the town square when she saw Penelope standing there.

“Are these - are these what I think they are?” she asked.

“Well - if you think they’re special flowers that are saying I want you to be my girlfriend then - yes?”

Leah laughed and laughed, and then she kissed her, and it was suddenly the warmest winter Penelope had ever known.

Penelope hadn’t doubted she was gay since the sixth grade and her first crush ever (Mimi Marquez from Rent). But damn, did Leah manage to remind her every day.

Leah would be covered in sweat from working hard on a large sculpture and Penelope would look at her and think damn, I’m gay.

Leah would show up with ingredients to make dinner one evening, knowing Penelope would be exhausted from working in the mine, and she would hear her gentle laughter in the kitchen while she iced her back in the other room and think damn, I’m gay.

Leah would kiss her hard and fast, pressed up against the kitchen counter, and then Penelope would hardly be able to think at all, but if she was, the only real thought that would come would be I am so, so, so gay.

And also that she was so, so in love.

Leah wanted to take things slow after everything that happened with Kel, which suited Penelope fine. There were plenty of long make-out sessions on one of their couches, and many long walks in the snow, hand in hand. And then there was one night, towards the end of winter, when a late snowstorm kicked up and make it hard to see even a foot past the windows of the farmhouse.

“You know, I try not to make a habit of quoting carols - but it really is cold outside. You could stay,” Penelope offered, tentatively.

Leah beamed with quiet warmth, her nose scrunching, as she hid her face behind her mug of hot chocolate.

“I was hoping you’d say that.”

When they got to the bedroom, Leah undressed before Penelope could offer to give her some privacy. She got to watch the arch of her back as she pulled the sweater over her head, see the gentle pudge of her stomach sticking out over the band of her cotton underwear, the freckles on her legs and the red hair that covered them, fuck -

“Ooh, this looks cozy. Can I borrow it?” Leah held up a big, ratty pink sweater.

“Uh huh.” Penelope hoped she didn’t look as dazed as she sounded. Leah pulled on the sweater. It brushed the tops of her thighs and swayed against her butt as she walked over to the bathroom, and Penelope felt delicious, wet heat sinking into the space between her legs. She knew what she was thinking about the next time she pulled her beloved vibrator out of the bedside table and teased herself all over before sliding it home so it pulsed against her G-spot and buzzed against her clit at the same time - those legs.

Maybe she’d think about those legs brushing against her face as she licked her -

“Hey, honey - do you mind if I use the last of this lotion you’ve got here? It smells amazing.”

“Go ahead,” Penelope said after she cleared her throat. “I, uh, made it myself. With those crocuses I gathered the other day.”

“Mm. Nice.”

She wasn’t staring.

She was not staring at Leah as she spread the lotion between her hands, propped a leg up on the bed, and began smoothing it over her freckled skin. She was definitely not staring at the way the sweater rode up and gave her a view of that white cotton underwear -

“Uh, I should get ready for bed too I guess,” she said at last.

“Yeah,” Leah laughed, scooping up more lotion. “I’m definitely not sleeping next to you in your dirty mining clothes.”

Oh god, she probably smelled like goat and cow and chicken and sheep and clay and granite dust from the quarry. She hadn’t thought of that.

“Shit, sorry. I should probably shower.”

“I didn’t say that,” Leah said. Her smile as she capped the lotion was more sultry. “I happen to like the way you smell, you know.”

She was staring again.

At the pink bow ofLeah’s lips, at the end of her braid where it swung over her shoulder.

She was aching between her legs at the thought of running her fingers through that hair. Of sliding her fingers in somewhere else.

“Penelope?”

Leah looked both confused and amused. She’d been staring again.

“Shit, fuck, sorry, I - I’m just, like, really, really turned on right now.”

The only way to describe the smile that Leah gave her then was catlike. It was sly and full of promise and doing absolutely nothing to make Penelope less turned on.

“Oh good. I was wondering about that. Because I’m pretty turned on right now, too.”

Yes.

Leah was as slow and gentle as Penelope had imagined. Her kisses were long and sweet. Her skin was soft and warm. She liked it when Penelope sucked her nipples into hard points and when she bit down on the side of her neck - and she liked it best of all when Penelope pulled down her underwear and ran her fingers along her wet, swollen cunt.

“Yes, I want you just like that,” she murmured. No shyness here, not naked and spread out on the quilt under the winter starlight.

“Just like this?” Penelope asked, her voice barely a whisper. This all felt like a mirage that could slip away at any moment. No matter how real and slick and perfect the flesh under her fingers was.

“Yeah - now kiss me -”

No one had to tell her twice to kiss Leah.

She kissed her as she slid one finger and then another inside her. She kissed her as she rubbed the pad of her thumb in a slow, wide circle around her clit. She stopped kissing her only to make sure that that was good. (“Yeah, slow like that, slow like that is good.”) She kissed her again until the sweet pressure of Leah’s thigh between her legs was becoming too much, when she had to rock against it over and over and over because it just felt so good on her own clit. She kissed her until Leah kept saying more, more, more and all her focus had to be on fucking her with her fingers and thumbing her clit now and then, until a beautiful pink flush spread all over Leah’s skin and her eyes screwed shut with ecstasy and she came, cunt squeezing tight around Penelope’s fingers, and the sight was so beautiful that it had Penelope rubbing frantically against Leah’s thigh - and then Leah recovered enough to slide her own fingers in-between them, and it was just enough pressure, just enough friction, and Penelope felt her own clit swell and twitch and then throb with pleasure as she came, too.

Then there was time to kiss again.

Time to lick the taste of Leah from her fingers.

“You’re kind of perfect, you know,” Leah said, lying there warm and pink and satisfied beneath her. Penelope felt herself glow from the inside out. She was perfect to the woman she loved - anxieties, insecurities, spreadsheets and all

***

The day they got married was kind of perfect, too. It was nearly a year to the day since they first met in the Stardrop Saloon - a late spring day filled with drifting blossoms and the smell of fresh earth. The Community Center wasn’t rebuilt, not completely, and the cherry saplings weren’t coming in as fast as Penelope would have liked, and yields on the kale had been low so far, and one of the goats might be sick and she was behind on collecting lumber for the new coop -

But it was perfect.

It was perfect because Leah was her wife.

Because after the heartache of Marie and the soul-sucking boredom of Joja and the terrifying risk of coming to Stardew Valley - it was all worth it.

Waking the morning after to their little farmhouse and Jin meowing for more food and Leah already in the kitchen, making coffee, humming a song - it was all worth it. The kind of thing you couldn’t plan for in a spreadsheet. The kind of thing she hadn’t dared to hope for in a long time.

Penelope rose, ready to tackle the day.

#beach writes #stardew valley #leah from stardew valley #female player x leah #idk what the fandom tags are #whoops #not da

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klaprisun · 6 months ago

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One Sunny Day

(Stardew Valley)(Haley x Female Farmer)

Chapter 20: Haley's POV

A bright flash of light followed by a click wakes me with a start from my slumber I didn't even know I fell into. When I opened my eyes, I noticed I'm looking at the coffee table that's in our living room. I furrow my brows in confusion as to why I am on the couch.

Before even getting up, I can already feel my whole body aching, along with my head pounding in pain. Although, I feel a slow up and down motion coming from under my head. I sit up a little too fast because my head throbs in extreme pain.

"Owwww!" I whine while grabbing my head. When I look down at what I was laying on, it was not a sight I was expecting. I let out a gasp and cover my mouth in disbelief.

Danny is sprawled out on the couch under me. Arms flailed in either direction with one hanging off the edge and one draped over the arm of the couch behind her head. Her mouth is hung open, drool nearly escaping from the corner of her mouth. Her clothes are disheveled and wrinkled with the hem of her tank top rolled up, exposing her perfectly toned stomach.

What really gets me though, is her mouth, cheeks, and neck are absolutely smeared with pink lipstick. MY pink lipstick. Along with the lipstick on her collarbone, I notice a few purple blotches forming on her skin. Hickeys.

Jumping up from the way I was sitting and straddling Danny's waist on the couch, I took several steps back, still covering my mouth with my hand.

"Good thing you'll never forget this moment now!" Emily sings as she hands me my camera.

"You took a picture?!" I hiss back, trying to be quiet so as to not wake Danny. My head also hurts too much for loud noises right now anyway.

"Sure did. You're welcome," Emily laughs as she walks away.

Frantically, I start pacing back and forth along the hardwood floor. I don't know what to do about Danny.

Will she remember anything that happened? I think to myself. Part of me hopes she does because I don't remember anything at all. I want someone to inform me of whatever went on last night because the aftermath is quite suggestive.

I take another, guilty pleasure look at Danny sprawled out on the couch. Everything about her is so breathtaking that it's hard to pull my gaze away. To me, she has always seemed like a goddess. The feelings that started to form when she first moved to Pelican Town I knew were not jealousy. I knew I didn't want to be like her, or have her hairstyle, or anything like that. That feeling was one that yearned to be WITH her which is something I've never felt before.

When I first got to see her personality, it made my thoughts and feelings intensify. Somehow, she manages to be gorgeous, kind, hot, and respectful all at the same time. This girl single handedly made me question my entire sexuality.

Sure I have occasionally checked out another girl when I visit Zuzu City or have thought about kissing them, but I thought all girls did that. I thought it was normal. But, I also liked being with Alex and making out with random guys at the bar, or so I thought. All of my experiences with guys are just incomparable now that Danny has entered my life. There just seems to be a brighter spark when I'm around her, one I've never felt with a guy.

A small stir from the couch snaps me out of my thoughts. Panicked and without thinking, I darted into the bathroom and shut the door. I dramatically slide down the back of it and land, butt first, on the cold floor. I scrunch my knees up to my chest and start bawling hysterically into my knees.

"Why did my first time hooking up with a girl have to be when I'm drunk?" I sob, muffled by my knees, "Why did I have to forget everything that happened... and why did it have to be with Danny?" I begin to cry louder, unable to control the sobs.

A small knock beckons from the other side of the door. I inhale deeply, trying to stop the tears so I can answer the door. When I think I'm okay, I stand and turn the knob of the door.

"Are you okay?" Danny whispers, squinting from the bright, morning light.

For some reason, that absolutely broke me. I burst into a fit of tears once again and went to shut the door on her. She shoves her foot against the door to stop it from closing, catching me off guard. Since I was still trying to process what she did, she makes her move and slides into the bathroom with me. She shut the door behind her and went to lean on the bathroom sink which is directly in front of me.

Still blubbering in my tears, I turn my face away so she can't see the hot mess of a state I'm in.

"Why'd you try to shut the door on me, Haley?" Danny quietly asks me. I go to answer her, but just can't make the words form in my mouth. All that comes out are air hungry gasps.

Danny pats the ledge of the bathtub that's next to the sink, urging me to take a seat. With my arms folded across my chest, I obediently took a seat where she patted.

I try to calm down so I can explain everything to her, but every time I look at Danny's lipstick stained face, I begin to cry again.

Giving up on trying to speak, I walk over to Danny and grab her by the shoulders. I spin her around so she is face to face with the mirror above the sink. This is also the first time I have looked in the mirror since waking up as well.

The two of us stood there silently, staring at the reflection of whatever had gone on the night before. Not only did Danny have lipstick all over her, but I had it smeared all over my face as well. My hair is a rat's nest, and there are mascara stains running down my cheeks from all my crying.

I watch as Danny brings a hand up to her collarbone and brushes her fingers over the hickeys. I watch as a wave of sadness washes over her face.

"I don't remember... anything..." she chokes, voice breaking mid sentence ever so slightly. Our reflections lock eyes with one another, neither one of us turning to look at the other face to face.

Her saying that completely broke my heart, more than it already was. Neither of us will get to know what went on or how it even started in the first place.

"I'm sorry," I managed to get out. I break eye contact to look down at the floor in shame, tears still threatening to escape from my eyes.

"Oh no no no what are you sorry for?" Danny concerningly bends over and cups my cheeks in her hands. Using my finger, I motion a circle around her head and neck.

"Ah don't worry about it. Most of this can wash off. Speaking of, let's get you cleaned up as well." Danny turns the handle of the sink to get the water running, but I hesitate. Feeling my stomach start bubbling uncomfortably, I scurry to the toilet and drop to my knees. Danny immediately clues in and rushes over to pull back my tangled mess of hair.

The pain and uncomfortableness of my stomach causes me to start crying again. Danny had started rubbing cold water from the sink on the back of my neck, trying to help.

"Do you want some ginger ale? I can go grab you some-" Danny started to walk to the door but I grabbed her ankle and tugged her back, shaking my head. I didn't want to be alone right now.

She decided to join me by sitting on the ground, but was leaning against the side of the tub with her legs stretched in front of her. I was still balled up near the toilet.

"I never want to be that drunk again," I squeak quietly, but still loud enough for her to hear. My comment caused her to let out a chuckle. Her laugh is so contagious, that it got me laughing too.

"Are you too okay in there?" Emily yells through the door.

"Yes we are," The two of us respond in unison.

"My shift at the saloon starts soon. I just thought I'd let you guys know in case you are wondering where I am... unlikely... but just in case. See you later!" she yells through the door again. We hear her footsteps walk away from the door.

"Are you feeling good enough to get washed up now?" Danny questions me. I give her a nod in response.

She stands up, turns, and helps me get on my feet. She holds her hand out and I grasp it tightly, putting all my weight on her hand. She pulls me up and walks me to the sink.

She finds a washcloth hanging up on a towel rack and dampens in the water. She begins to wipe the mascara and lipstick stains from my face, making sure to get every last mark. She does a little nod of satisfaction when she seems to have finished.

I take the washcloth from her hand and start doing the same to her face. When all the pink lipstick smears have been washed away, the hickeys look even more prominent and visible. Hopefully Danny can figure out how to cover them up.

"I better go now and let you get in the shower. I just know you're dying to do so. I don't blame you, I'm going to go home and do the same thing," Danny says as she opens the bathroom door to leave. She pauses in the doorway for a second, seemingly deep in thought. She makes eye contact with me one last time, but then walks out of the bathroom.

I have no idea what is going to happen between the two of us after today. I almost don't even want to think about it. But I can't help feeling some sort of hope?

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wiremagazine · 7 years ago

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POMPANO BEACH VACATION RENTALS - AWARD WINNING ACCOMODATIONS WITH THE COMFORTS OF HOME

By Rafa Carvajal | Photos courtesy of Beach Vacation Rentals

Elaine Fitzgerald and her Beach Vacation Rentals in Pompano Beach pride themselves on providing tourists, staycationers and business travelers with short-term cottage and vacation rentals at five top-rated properties in Pompano Beach and the Greater Fort Lauderdale area in Florida. As a member of the Superior Small Lodging Association, which requires them to meet much higher standards than traditional hotels for cleanliness, quality and service in annual surprise inspections, they have also earned several travel industry awards for excellence. Elaine and her staff also welcome and encourage members of the LGBTQ community to vacation at her properties.

I sat down with Elaine to learn why her Beach Vacation Rentals has received several top industry awards, and what her guests enjoy the most about staying at her properties.

Rafa Carvajal: Tell our readers about your company and what you offer for their travel needs. Elaine Fitzgerald: Beach Vacation Rentals offers tourists, staycationers and business travelers short-term cottage and apartment rentals at five top-rated boutique properties in Pompano Beach/greater Fort Lauderdale, Florida. They are authentic Florida historic and vintage properties with studios, 1/1s and 2/2s that have been restored and maintained in pristine condition, with modern conveniences added. All properties are within a two-minute walk to Pompano's spectacular new beachfront, and a short walk to dozens of restaurants, shops and dive boats. Small dogs are invited too! These properties are quiet and serene, but in great locations close to the action when you want it. They include Cottages by the Ocean, Bahama Beach Club, Sunny Place, Pineapple Place and Pelican Place.

RC: Tell us about some of the amenities that you offer. EF: Guests enjoy full kitchens, king beds, BBQ, guest laundry, and swimming pools at most properties. Beach gear, books and family games are included. Guests enjoy free Wi-Fi, free parking and pay no resort fees.

RC: Why are your top rated properties in Pompano Beach so popular with your guests? EF: Our guests love that they are buying an authentic experience staying at any of our properties. I personally greet our guests upon arrival. I'm available to answer their questions or help with itineraries, and then leave them alone to enjoy their stay. My maintenance chief and I are just a phone call away if they need anything. We offer a complete alternative to staying at a traditional hotel. It's more private and quiet, with so many more comforts of home. You have the space of a full cottage or apartment for the same price as a single hotel room. The gardens are lush and tropical with every property being a Certified Wildlife Habitat by the National Wildlife Federation. It's a special program for businesses, schools and backyards that meet all the criteria to provide food, water, shelter and places to raise young for native and migrating birds and butterflies.

RC: How do your properties differ from others in the area? EF: First of all, our properties are members of the Superior Small Lodging Association, which means we are required to meet much higher standards than traditional hotels for cleanliness, quality and service in annual surprise inspections. Unlike renting an apartment from a private individual, we are licensed, have staff and operate with all of the standards of a well-run business, so there are no mysteries or surprises in what you are getting. We are a multiple White Glove Award winner by the Superior Small Lodging Association, and have attained the highest reviews on TripAdvisor, earning their 2017 Certificate of Excellence. We also won the 2017 Travel Writers' Experts' Choice Award with our high reviews from travel guides like Lonely Planet and Fodors, placing us in the "Top two percent of U.S. Hotels." We were recommended by the New York Times Sunday travel article as "Best Place to Stay."

RC: Out of the five properties, which is your favorite and why? EF: Each property is equally nice, but different, so it becomes personal preference. My favorite is Cottages by the Ocean, even though that property does not have a swimming pool. It does have big, screened-in, private porches that our guests love, and the property is historic for Pompano Beach. These were the first "resort" cottages at a time when pineapple fields covered the surrounding area. They are adorable – like little doll houses. We do tend to house singles, couples and business people at Cottages by the Ocean, Bahama Beach Club and Sunny Place because they have mostly studios and 1/1s. We direct families with children more often to Pineapple Place and Pelican Place because those properties have 2/2s.

RC: What do your guests enjoy the most about staying in your properties? EF: Guests appreciate that our properties are quiet and pretty, and close to everything.

RC: What tours and adventures do you suggest for your guests? EF: Each apartment has a brochure stand with the A-list of things to do, and our guest books include a two-page write-up titled "Elaine's Best Bets." If someone is from out of town and wants to see places unique to our area that they can't see anywhere else in the world, I suggest things to do that cumulatively among our past guests have been rated the best:

A snorkel or dive trip to Shipwreck Park, just one mile offshore from Pompano's fishing pier, with 17 wrecks and sunken artwork. This vast artificial reef system and cultural arts park is designed to be fun for divers and takes the pressure off of natural reefs nearby.

A round of golf at the only Greg Norman signature course ever designed on a public golf facility, so at Pompano's municipal golf course the public can play a designer course at public golf course rates.

A visit to the free spectator area at the Goodyear Blimp base, where the blimp goes up and down every 20 minutes when it's in town. Awesome to see 12 big guys grab the ropes to bring it down on the tarmac while passengers unload and new passengers board, and the men let up on the ropes and away she goes again.

A full day trip to Billie Swamp Safari which I believe is by far the best Everglades experience out there.

A two hour visit to Butterfly World – a beautiful botanical garden that houses the world's largest butterfly farm.

An evening on the Jungle Queen to see the wealth and beauty of our Venice of America.

All of these things to do are world class, but also a great value for the price. If guests have limited time and do these things, relax on our beautiful beach, and go out to some of Pompano's amazing restaurants, they will have had an absolutely memorable stay.

RC: Describe Beach Vacation Rentals in 3 words. EF: The tagline we use and always try to live up to is "comfort, charm and value."

RC: What is the best feedback you've ever received from your guests? EF: Several business people have become regular customers and sometimes call at the last minute to say they are on their way. We have been told, "Just put me anywhere, Elaine. If it's one of your apartments it will be perfect."

RC: Tell us about some of the Hot Deals you guys have at the moment. EF: High season does not come with specials, but our rates drop nearly in half starting the week after Easter and all the way through early December. Guests who visit us between May 1 and October 15 are given unlimited use of special VIP passes that get them two people for the price of one into more than 60 of the most popular things to do in the area. These include Elaine's "Best Bets" mentioned above, as well as things like snorkel trips, sunset catamaran trips, historic home tours and much more.

For more information or to book your stay, visit 4rentbythebeach.com or call 954.283.1111

This was originally published in Wire Magazine Issue 08.2018

#wire magazine #wiremag.com #wire #miami #miami beach #south beach #sobe #fort lauderdale #wynwood #wilton manors #gay #lgbt #glbt #Beach Vacation Rentals

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cecilspeaks · 8 years ago

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Ghost Stories

You can purchase Ghost Stories here.

Transcript of the bonus tracks here.

1. Intro

Meg Bashwiner: And now, listeners of every kind: the voice of Night Vale, Cecil Baldwin!

[applause]

Cecil: We have nothing to fear but fear itself. Also many other things, several of which can be found in your home. Welcome to Night Vale!

Listeners, honest honored listeners, Cecil here as always your voice to carry you through the lonely hours. Today is a very special day indeed. Today, as we all know, is the annual Night Vale ghost story contest. In which every citizen is required to put forward their scariest, spookiest tale of spectors and haunts. The City Council chooses their favorite, and the winner is, through a process that is truly terrifying in its simplicity, turned into a ghost. The losers are forced to continue in forms that primarily depend upon the containment and transportation of oozes and glob.

Now I’m sure that you’ve all been preparing your own entry for the ghost story contest, since all of you will soon have to stand up and deliver it to the gathered people. But before all of you each individually have your turn, I thought that I might indulge myself for a moment and tell you my own entry to your ghost story contest. Are you all OK with that? [applause] I have no idea what you just said so, gonna nod and give myself a thumbs up and I think we’re all good here.

2. Horoscopes

But first, let’s have a look at today’s horoscopes. Leo? [silence] Leo? [audience whoops] Leo! Bet all your money on red! All those material possessions were only weighing you down. Soon you will be in many ways – free-er than the rest of us.

Virgo? You know that one spot on your back that itches and itches and itches and you just can’t stand it? Well, good thing: you won’t have to deal with that or anything else after tomorrow night.

Libra? Draw your loved ones closer to you. That first drawing you did was no good, no, draw them like closer to you. There’s too much white space on the page! How are your loved ones supposed to love you if you can’t even draw them right?

Scorpio? OK so, I think we all know by now that this is the sign of.. uuughhh.. Steve Carlsberg. Who is my sister Abby’s husband. Now, usually the horoscope just happens to turn out something quite mean for Scorpio. Purely through the unknowable combination of fate and random chance that is the meeting of the stars. But Abby said that the stars had better knock that off! Especially if they want to be invited to their niece Janice’s first ballet fight. So, let’s see how this goes. Scorpio. Things are looking bright. What a great day you have before you! Look how clear the sky, how green the grass how – dumb and oversized your feet look. [gleefully] No really, I hope you don’t trip or rip your pants not even once! How terrible it would be if that happened! But it probably won’t through, so there you go. [mutters] Scorpios…

Sagittarius? Ahahahahahahaha, aahahahahahahaha, aaahahahahahaha!

Capricon? Things fall apart, the center cannot hold, mere anarchy is loosed upon the world. The blood (--) [02:42] tide is loosed upon the world and everywhere! So your home carpentry project will not go well next week. There’s just too much blood.

Aquarius? OK, you are just two dogs in a trench coat, Aquarius. I mean I hate to break it to you, but you have no opposable thumbs, or language skills. And you’ve always been two dogs in a trench coat! [cooing] Yes you are, yes you arrre!! [kissing noises] Now go outside! Good dogs!

Pisces? If you don’t have anything nice to say, try saying something mean. I mean there are lots of options for things to say.

Aries? Ooh. OK, so this horoscope is just a picture of a bear. And next to the bear is the lizard and next to the lizard is the pelican. And there’s a combined speech bubble above them all that says “We regret the storm that took your lives.” And they’re smiling and (-) [0:03:57] some mugs of beer together. And they have their feet up on skulls. And if you look really closely you’ll notice that they’re not standing on a pile of sticks, but on a pile of human bones?! And unfortunately I believe that in this cartoon, Aries – you’re the pelican!

Taurus? No sunshine for you, Taurus! Nope! The sun’s light has been blocked, but only for you. Oh yes, everyone else will walk in sunny rays, sunshades and shorts, wide smiles and hat brims, SPF 50 and a Frisbee at the beach. You will likely lose feeling in your skin due to the cold of a [sinister voice] sunless world! [friendly voice] Good luck!

Gemini? They say an onion has many layers. Gemini, you are like that onion. Time has peeled away, one after another, each of your hard, pungent layers: snap, snap, snap! They (pry) off and urgent fingernails pry away the remnants as you grow smaller, wetter, less complex. Ooh, also like an onion, your odor makes as cry.

Cancer? Well this just says “chainsaw accident”. So I bet that’s a metaphor for something really goood!

3. A Word from our Sponsors

Cecil: And now a word from our sponsors. For that, we have a sentient patch of haze here in the studio with me, and her name is Deb! Deb?

Deb: Thank you Cecil. Today I am here on behalf American Airlines – your partner in the sky.

Cecil: Fantastic. What does American have to say to us today?

Deb: American Airlines is committed to.. [giggling] your safety! And comfort.. [giggling] and getting you into the air. It is our promise that we will get you up there. You will rise from the ground. For sure, that will happen. And you will soar above the clouds.

Cecil: Well that’s wonderful to hear, you know it’s reassuring to know that American Airlines will see us safely and comfortably through takeoff, flight, and landing!

Deb: [long beat] No Cecil. We didn’t say that. We don’t wanna promise we can’t say for sure we can deliver on. We will get you up there.

Cecil: And then what then?

Deb: Oh, what anywhen? Do we see the future?

Cecil: Oh?

Deb: No.

Cecil: No.

Deb: Life is chaotic, and it would be irresponsible to start making promises.

Cecil: Yes, but mostly you land those planes, rights?

Deb: I haven’t checked lately. But if it helps you to say that out loud, then certainly you should do that, yeah, mm hm.

Cecil: Why do I always end up so worried after talking to you, Deb?

Deb: American Airlines. What goes up, must come down. We guarantee it.

Cecil: Alright, well thank you Deb.

Deb: So you’re all telling ghost stories, huh?

Cecil: Oh yes, yes we are.

Deb: Good. I have a wonderful story of a haunting to tell. It’s very popular among us, sentient patches of haze.

Cecil: Oh please, tell it.

Deb: Once upon a time, a nice family of sentient patches of haze moved into an ooold house. They were young and optimistic and ready to start a home, but soon they realized something was teeeerribly wrong. They heard noises in the night. Voices, folky yet slickly produced singer-songwriter music. At first they assumed it was just their imagination, but soon they saw shapes in the halls and bedrooms. They noticed movement in the corner of the parts of their haze that they used to see with. One day, one of the sentient patches turned the corner and there – [disgusted] was a human standing there! As clear as a day, as opaque as flesh. Well, that poor little patch screamed and floated away. But now they knew, [creepily] there were humans haunting their house.

Cecil: Now wait. Humans often live in houses, I mean did the humans own the house?

Deb: Oh Cecil, there you go again. Serving as a propaganda mouthpiece for the capitalist machine that says sentient patches of haze aren’t allowed to move into and take over any house that a human “owns”!

Cecil: Wait, a mouthpiece for the capitalist machine? Deb, your job is literally to be a spokeshaze for multinational corporations!

Deb: Hmph! Hmph! Hmph! How dare you! My contradictions are my own to grapple with. I’m leaving. Thank you for giving me time on the air, I appreciate it.

Cecil: Well it was an ad, and I’m assuming you get paid for those?

Deb: Sure if that assumption is helpful to you, goodbye Cecil.

Cecil: Alright, thank you Deb!

4. Ghost story #1

And now, listeners, a ghost story. MY ghost story.

It begins ten years ago, on a night just like – tonight. Heavy fog covered the town of Night Vale, turning the world into a blurry approximation, familiar landmarks into educated guesses. No stars, and the full moon diffused by the mist into a soft, feeble light from all around.

A man was driving down a dark road, there were no other cars around. And on the side of the road, up ahead, he saw a figure. A figure made strange by the half-hearted moon, a brief pause in a long fog. Now the figure had its hand up. It did not (thumb) (-), but instead gave a languid wave, more of a summons than a request. And the man shivered, for he knew that it was on this very stretch of road one year to the day before that day that was ten years ago on a night just like tonight. The oooold mill, finally burned down. And when it went, there was a woman inside of it. Now, it’s hard to fathom why she was there in that abandoned disused mill, but she was. And the unthinkable happened, without anyone having to think of it at all. And since then, it has been said that in the darkest hours of the darkest nights, a young woman flags down cars on the side of the road where the old mill used to be. And if they’re foolish enough to let her into the car, she stares directly at the driver. And if the driver is foolish enough to look her in the eyes even once – she takes them to her home. A dark, eternal place from which no one, ever, returns.

Still, he couldn’t leave behind what could be a person in need of aid just because of some spooky old story. So he pulled over, and the figure reached out her hand and opened the passenger door and – there was a cold breath, air from dead lungs that the mist curled into the car, and the figure sat.

And the driver was careful to look not too closely or for too long. “Um, uh, where are you headed?” the man said, but the figure was silent. So he began to drive once again. And the fog billowed as he drove, and he could swear that he could see that old mill as it had once stood, leaning and ramshackle. Now, that mill had not been in working order in decades, it was probably just its time to go when it burned, but still. He mourned the loss of what had been a part of his own. “Where to?” he said again without turning or looking at his passenger. And the figure spoke. The figure spoke with a voice that sounded like a body hitting freezing water, like the distant thud in an old house in the smallest hours of the night. [creepy voice] “You know wheeeree,” the figure said. “You know where I want to goooo.” And he did know. “I want to go – hoooooome.”

And he held the wheel tighter, and he pressed the gas harder, and he stared unblinkingly at the door because he knew that the figure’s face was only inches away now, and staring directly at him.

Oh, listen to me yammer on! Haha. You know, I should really get to some of the other business of community radio, or Station Management will [chuckling] just kill me. [long beat] At least I hope that’s all they’ll do to me.

The rest of this ghost story soon.

5. Tamika Flynn

Cecil: But now I have a really special guest in the studio today, who has their own ghost story to tell. She is one of our community’s most active young people, having formed a militia to keep our town safe from corporations and librarians, oh – and she is also an avid reader. So please welcome to the show – Tamika Flynn! Hi Tamika!

Tamika: Hi Cecil. [chuckles]

Cecil: You said you have a ghost story that you wanna share?

Tamika: Yes. I love books so much, and one of my favorite kinds of books is the ghost book.

Cecil: The ghost book? You mean horror novel, yes?

Tamika: You say potato, I say pohtata.

Cecil: You do?

Tamika: Yeah!

Cecil: Pohtata?

Tamika: Pohtata chips, pohtata salad. Pohtata poutine.. [chuckles]

Cecil: But that’s kind of a weird way to say potato.

Tamika: Well I learned English from reading it Cecil, not from listening to it! [chuckles, snorts repeatedly] Anyways. I love ghost stories because they’re so rich with symbolism and meaning. A lot of people think that ghost stories are just a one-note tale about a ghost haunting an old house, but if you look deeper under the surface, ghost stories are really about dead people who are now invisible or translucent beings who interact with the living in antiques homes, so..

Cecil: Very important difference.

Tamika: Would you like to hear my favorite ghost story, Cecil?

Cecil: Oh yes, please!

Tamika: Many years ago, in this very town.. [whispers] there was a librarian! Ooh! And the librarian would creep around the public library, hunting and slaughtering book lovers for sport! Innocent people would go to the library hoping to find a good book, something new and interesting. Maybe a classic of modern science fiction by Octavia Butler, or some surrealist literature by Amy Bender or, oh, maybe some pedantic buzzkill space essays by Neil deGrasse Tyson. [chuckles]

Cecil: Now, wait a minute! To be fair to Neil deGrasse Tyson, his Victorian era romances are really goo-oo-ood!

Tamika: [long beat] Anyways. One day, there was a young girl, a really smart girl. [chuckles] She was also really fit, like REALLY fit! [chuckles] But also smart like the smartest girl you can know. Ahem. And also really tough. Anyways, she went to the library to get a book, and just as she was perusing a collection of plays by the 17th century poet and spy Aphra Behn, she could smell something terrible, like an infection, like wet fur. It was humid suddenly, and she felt something watching her, slithering about just over her shoulder.

But this girl, she was fast too. She jumped to the side quickly just as a spiked tentacle came crashing down next to her, crushing the shelf containing play scripts by Pulitzer winner Annie Baker. Without thinking, the girl – she was also intuitive, like [whispers] soo intuitive! [chuckles] – she grabbed the tentacle before it could retract into the librarian’s protective shell. She then grabbed a copy of the “Complete Works of William Shakespeare” by Francis Bacon. It was the special edition that had the machete taped right there on the book jacket! [chuckles] She tore off the large knife and swung, striking the tentacle at its base. She swung again, landing an accurate blow between the soft small crevice and the hard skin. This girl was amaaaaziiiiing! The librarian shrieked, then with a double back flip – which was pretty easy for this girl… she narrowly avoided the splattering acid blood of the flailing creature and dealt a mortal blow right to its disgusting neck! She didn’t even need a blade to finish off the monster, she just used her fist! Splat! Pffffff! [breathes heavily] True story of the badass book loving girl there ever was! [chuckles]

Cecil: So this is a story about you, right? And how you defeated the librarian during the Summer Reading Program a few years back?

Tamika: Oh no. That story was about my best friend Jessica Littleton. She’s so smart and talented, [high-pitched] I just love her, she’s the best!

Cecil: OK Tamika, while I hate to nitpick, that was a really great story but that was like, [hoarsely] monster story, not like a ghoooo-oooost story.

Tamika: Well. Jessica jacked up that monster and now it’s a ghost, boom, ghost story! Well I gotta go do my math homework, and then we have the teen militia meeting this evening at the new skating rink, so bye Cecil! [chuckles]

Cecil: Bye, thank you Tamika!

6. Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner

It’s time for another edition of the Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner!

Did you know that time travel exists? OK well not yet, but we have learned from time travelers that it will be invented in just under 30 years. Now given that knowledge, I thought it’d be kind of fun to do a little experiment together, so. If you are legally allowed to own a smartphone, take that out now and open up that calendar application. No go ahead, don’t be shy!

Now what I want you to do is create a recurring event that starts on this exact day and time, and title that event, well, “travel back in time”. Ooh, and be sure to note your exact location, OK? Now, when you’ve done that, set that event to recur every year on this anniversary. That way, when your future self does eventually have access to a time machine, they’ll know to come back to this. very. Moment. And then once you’ve done all of that, hit “save” and your future self should appear immediately right in front of you!

OK, so do you see your future self? Alright, well you may have to look around just like a little tiny bit. Hold on, hold on. Do none of you see your future selves? Uh oooh…

[long silence]

Well, this has been the Children’s Fun Fact Science Corner!

7. Teddy Williams

Cecil: Now, a look at the Community Calendar. So let’s start off with an event that is happening today. To get in on the annual ghost story contest, Teddy Williams, owner of the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex, announced that he will be offering 20 per cent off admission and double game tokens for anyone who dresses up like a deceased ancestor, historical figure, or departed pet.

We have Teddy in the studio with us now to talk about some of the themed activity going on at the fun complex. Teddy?

Teddy Williams: Hello, Cecil.

Cecil: Hello.

TW: We are really getting into this ghost stories festival over at the Desert Flower today and we wanted to celebrate the spirit of the event [chuckles], no pun intended.

Cecil: No pun understood.

TW: OK well we’re getting into the ghost story.. mood. Over in the bowling lanes, we’ll be turning off all of the lights, and as customers try to navigate and stumble around in the dark, our staff will sneak up behind them and shout classic ghost things like “BOOO!” and [hoarsely] “Hello again son, I miss you, it’s so cold here”.

Cecil: Well that sounds like great fun that people will remember not unpleasantly for the rest of their lives.

TW: We hired some pretty expensive lawyers to make sure of that.

Cecil: Now Teddy, you seem to really love this day. Do you have a ghost story you wanna share?

TW: Well, OK sure. As you know we built the new skating rink on top of the old pet cemetery. And there’s this gost cat, a Persian cat. Super cute like you just wanna grab his little flat face and go [high-pitched squeaking] with your own face against his..

Cecil: Awww.

TW:..but you can’t. Because he’s a ghost and so your face just goes through, it’s just.. it’s like rrow, rrow. Anyway, turns out this cat belonged to former town billionaire Marcus Vanston. Marcus of course disappeared one day and no one knows for certain what happened to him..

Cecil: Oh, I-

TW: Or we do know, but none of us are legally allowed to say.

Cecil: Of course, because we can’t legally acknowledge the existence of..

TW: None of us are legally allowed to say Cecil, it could have been anything.

Cecil: Yeah of course. [whispers] Angel.

TW: So this ghost cat belonged to Marcus, and Marcus was so rich that he had taught the cat French.

Cecil: Ooh.

TW: Yeah. Now I myself don’t speak French, but I do have a Russian dictionary, and I feel like both languages are so dissimilar form English that they must be similar to each other.

Cecil: That’s an excellent point.

TW: Right? Anyway, the cat told me that his name is Peanut, and that he died of sorrow when his master, whom he loved so much, passed from this earth and left him alone in their vast palazzo. That as a cat, he cannot cry, so he simply shivered with sadness by himself under the basement stairs every night, until his body wasted away into such a thin whisp that the wings of death could easily and sweetly carry him off to be with his owner once again. But he has yet to reunite with Marcus and so now he has only lonely immortality and no conceivable escape.

Cecil: That’s heartbreaking!

TW: Yeah. So then I told him, [excitedly] “My name is Teddy, and I love video games!”

Cecil: Oh.

TW: [laughing] I tried to feed him one of those little fish treats. It just fell right through his… He’s forever hungry and he can never eat! Ooo, anyway. So I’ve been trying to learn Russian better so that we can speak in French.

Cecil: Sure, yeah.

TW: And he’s been coming around more often saying something that, okay sounds a little bit like “Je suis triste”, “Je suis mort”. Which I figured out means, “Hey Teddy, it’s great to see you!”

Cecil: Umm, now it’s been a moment since my French brainwashing in high school, but I’m pretty sure that “Je suis mort” means..

TW: “Great to see you” yeah, I know Cecil. Alright well, I gotta get back to the complex and I hope to see everyone out there. Now don’t forget that it’s happy hour from four to six at our bar. If you can be happy for those two straight hours, you get three-dollar draft beers and well drinks. So far, no one has been able to do it. Well, je suis mort, Cecil! Ha ha!

Cecil: Aha, thank you Teddy! [whimpering] Oh, Peanut!

8. Steve Carlsberg