#it would cost about the same as a deposit on a home

[homosexchad]

accidentally educating well meaning but confused cis people seems to be my new vibe lol

im mostly stealth irl but since i'm getting top surgery this summer and a couple of irl friends were like "omg why are you getting surgery? are you dying? are you ill?", i came out to some of them bc fuck it.

anyway, one girl asked how it worked and i mentioned scar care and she was so confused. turns out she thought that every top surgery consisted of basically vacuuming the tit out and then being fine the same day. bruh.

my college tutors were baffled, but in a chill way. ended up turning my 5 minute "ok, here's how we'll tell your apprenticeship employer" meeting into a 45 minute deep dive where i accidentally radicalised one of my tutors because he genuinely thought transitioning was like a "go to the GP and you're done in a year" thing, and not a 4 year waitlist, 1 year diagnosis, blood tests, more waiting, hormones, then a constant uphill battle, a year of appointments for a referral, years of waiting for surgery, weight limits with no wiggle room, etc.

the weight limit thing really confused him, he was like "but you're not even fat!" and i was like "well, first of all, i am" and then explained the additional risks and how pretty much every surgeon in this country has a BMI limit of 30, which is part of the reason i'm glad to be able to go private bc i'd have to lose about 20kg to be eligible for most NHS surgeons, and going abroad is??? a bit too scary for me lol.

he asked about GRCs and i explained how they work and what they do and he was shook lol. i was like yeah bro, i've got 7 years of evidence and my statutory declaration but no NHS diagnosis, and they won't accept my private doctor's diagnosis bc they're not The List of Approved Doctors so i've been waiting for this NHS appointment for years.

"how much is it for you to go private?? it's hOW MUCH?? EVERY MONTH?? how much is surgery? IT'S WHAT NOW?!?! is there a payment plan? NO?!??!"

homie asked when the next protest was 😂

he said i can contact him whenever i want to get stuff off my chest about this topic and for once i was like yknow what. yes it's frustrating that there's an expectation for me to educate others, but also like. there's so much misinformation online rn about how transitioning works, what legal transition looks like, what the legal rights are, that it's kind of chill. i have the energy, and if it's a well meaning person that i know well enough i'm kind of chill with it.

[ceruark]

liquid courage

synopsis: aventurine leaves your drunk boss on your doorstep. notes: ceo! sunday x gn! personal assistant! reader. modern au (he's still an angel though, don't ask me how or why. the wings are important to me). fluff. cw: none! (implied aventurine/ratio, but nothing major) words: 3,147 inspiration: every kdrama ever

It was, for the first time in several months, a relaxing night.

After weeks of traveling between worlds and meeting with various business partners, you finally landed back in the place you called home: a rather luxurious unit in Golden Hour's finest apartment complex. It was far too big for one person and beyond what you dreamed of affording growing up, but it was necessary.

Not only were Golden Hour's Platinum Terraces a fifteen minute drive away from Dewlight Pavilion, but they also had the best security Penacony could offer. As the personal assistant of Halovian Corporation's esteemed CEO, you had a rather large target on your back. So, despite your initial hesitations, you'd agreed to live in the flashiest building in Golden Hour.

It wasn't like your wallet was suffering because of it. The astronomical cost of rent hardly put a dent in what the Oak Family deposited into your account every other week.

You sighed and stretched out leisurely on your couch, flipping through the channels until you settled on a showing of one of your favorite movies. You let it play in the background while you responded to messages from friends you hadn't had the chance to get back to during the trip. In between enthusiastic conversations and pictures of the fancy meals and hotels you'd stayed at, you scrolled through your social media accounts, grimacing at your feed when it recommended a picture taken of you without your knowledge.

It shouldn't have surprised you that being around Sunday constantly would put you under the same spotlight he grew up in. Heir to the Oak Family's fortune and beloved by Penacony's citizens, the only person on the planet who could complain about having more cameras shoved in their face on a daily basis was his darling sister. As his assistant, you showed up in almost every photo his fans snapped of him. Over the past four years, his fanbase picked apart everything about you: your appearance, your upbringing, your interests, and your lifestyle habits. You weren't quite sure what spurred them on— sheer jealousy at your proximity to him, or their infatuation for him extending to you— but they had all reached the same conclusion: you were rather unremarkable.

You were raised by your parents in a suburb about 30 miles out from Golden Hour. You performed well enough in university, graduating in the top percent of your class, but not as valedictorian. You managed to get hired at Halovian Corp out of college, and you'd been consistently promoted each year since then, moving from secretary to administrative secretary to personal assistant of a high-ranking director, until eventually, you ended up at Sunday's side.

Though your career was impressive, your life lacked intrigue that news outlets and Sunday's fans vied for. You didn't come from money, you weren't dating anyone famous, and therefore, you weren't worth thinking about. You preferred things that way, but it still didn't make seeing pictures of yourself floating around online any easier.

(Especially when people began overanalyzing how Sunday spoke to you in this video, or looked at you in that photo. Their theories had substance to back them up, and you didn't like to think about it. It took damn near two years to perfect the professional front you kept up with your gorgeous boss, thank you very much, and it had only been about a year since he started actually acting himself around you— you couldn't afford to start slipping up now.)

As you scrolled past a fancam of Robin, a message notification popped up at the top of your screen. You tapped on it, and raised an eyebrow at the sender.

Aventurine: hey. you in?

The IPC director was an unlikely friend, but after dealing with Sunday for years and becoming the unofficial point of contact between the IPC and Halovian Corp, you'd started seeing him often enough that you agreed to go to a bar with him one night when you were off the clock. He was good company, and the two of you kept in touch.

One day, after finding out you'd been talking with Aventurine outside of business ventures, Sunday was oddly insistent that he join you two on that night's excursion. You were hesitant to agree, given that Sunday and Aventurine were civil at best and downright antagonistic at worst. But, Aventurine had readily agreed to letting Sunday attend, so you said yes as well. The night had gone better than expected, and after a few more impromptu meetings, Sunday had started talking to Aventurine regularly as well.

You were glad to see your overly cautious boss make a friend, even if he would never admit that they were.

You: yeah, what's up?

His response was instantaneous.

Aventurine: great. let me in, will you?

Your eyebrows drew together. You'd mentioned you lived in the Platinum Terraces, but you'd never brought Aventurine back to your apartment. How did he know where you live?

You leaned off the couch and toward the coffee table to pick up one of the screens hooked up to the alarm system. You tapped a few buttons on the screen until the feed from the camera facing the hallway came up.

Aventurine stood in front of your door, talking animatedly to your boss, who was propped up against him. You couldn't see his face, but you didn't need to to know he was inebriated. He probably wouldn't be so close to the blonde otherwise.

"What the hell?" You muttered, rushing over to the door. Sunday hardly ever drank, and if he did, it was never enough to get him past the point of tipsy. You quickly undid the bolts and threw it open.

Aventurine and Sunday looked up at you. Amusement danced in the former’s eyes, and for whatever reason, he seemed to be very pleased with himself.

Sunday blinked slowly, adjusting his vision to the sudden disappearance of the door. His eyes scanned your face for a moment before his features lit up with recognition. His wings twitched a bit as he tilted his head to the side. The slightest of smiles pulled at his mouth, and your name fell from his lips in the form of a whispered question.

You flushed red. You suddenly felt very self-conscious of your Hanu themed pajama pants.

Your gaze snapped back to Aventurine, who smirked back at you. You ignored it. "What happened?"

"We went out drinking and someone—" He turned to Sunday, whose gaze still hadn't left you. "—got a little carried away."

"And you didn't think to take him back to Dewlight Pavilion?"

"I think you and I both know there would be consequences if he returned there in this state."

You grimaced. He was right. Undoubtedly, there would be paparazzi camped outside of the Oak Family's estate. There always was.

"Okay, you didn't think to take him back to your place?"

Aventurine moved his free hand to his chest in mock offense. "Bringing a drunken man home to my brilliant boyfriend who's already waiting for me in bed? You must be praying on my downfall."

You glowered at him, but before you could respond, the rustling of feathers caught your attention. You turned, watching your boss sway on his feet. He watched you with a frown, appearing more upset than you'd ever seen him.

"You don't want me here?" He pouted, and his wings fluttered dejectedly.

Your stomach flipped over, and you reached out to grab his other arm as he stumbled away from Aventurine.

"No, no, that's not it." He moved away from the blonde completely as you reassured him, leaning into your touch. You grunted as you struggled to keep him upright. "I'm just worried about you being somewhere you don't feel comfortable."

He hummed, leaning forward and nuzzling his face in your hair. "I'm far more comfortable with you than the gambler."

Aventurine watched the two of you, smugness rolling off him in waves. "Yeah," he laughed, "we can see that."

You were going to kill Aventurine. You were going to tuck Sunday into your bed, leave a glass of water and an Advil on the nightstand, and then you were going to hit the blonde with your car.

You shot him another glare before turning back to Sunday. You pulled one of his arms around your shoulders and wrapped one of yours around his waist to steady him. He turned bright red suddenly and you opened your mouth to ask him if he felt sick, but his wings started flapping again. This close, a few feathers smacked into your mouth, and you sputtered.

Aventurine's unrestrained laughter brought your attention back to him. You snapped at him. "Can you make yourself useful and get the doors for me?"

It took everything you had left in you to get Sunday into your bedroom and withstand Aventurine's teasing, but eventually, you managed to get there. You eased Sunday down on the bed, keeping a hand on his back to ensure he stayed sitting upright.

"Are you feeling sick?" You asked.

Sunday shook his head. He leaned over and rested his head on your shoulder. Fighting down another blush (you refused to give Aventurine more ammunition), you tried to pull yourself away from him, but he wrapped his arms around yours and held on.

"Sunday," you said, "I need to go get you water. Can you let go of me, please?"

His voice was muffled by your shirt. "Aventurine can get it."

Said man huffed, but he was too entertained to be truly annoyed, or to decline. "Sure I can," he agreed, before addressing you. "Where are your cups?"

"Top right cabinet," you answered, and he set off.

Sunday's head lolled to the side, rolling off your shoulder. His pout was still there, and it set your face aflame. "It's too hot," he complained.

And then he started to take his coat off.

Well, he tried to. His clumsy movements caused it to get tangled in his arms.

"Here, let me help you," you offered against your better judgment. You stood and reached behind him, carefully guiding his arms out of the sleeves. You turned around and walked over to your closet, hanging the coat on a nearby hook.

When you faced him again, he already had his shirt halfway off.

Xipe, give me strength, you thought to yourself, tearing your gaze away from his bare skin. Your gaze lingered on the wings sprouting from his lower back, which sat curled around his abdomen. When he managed to get the shirt over his head and onto the floor, he unfurled the second set of wings. They spanned the entire length of your bed and were much darker than the ones by his hair. He gave a few languid flaps before settling down, causing them to droop. You closed your eyes and pressed your palms against them. So much for keeping up your professional front. You had no idea how you were going to face him when he sobered up.

A choked gasp prompted you to drop your hands from your face. Aventurine almost dropped the glass in shock when he returned. 

"Well," he said as he placed the glass down on the nightstand. "Seems like it's time for me to leave."

You sent him one last scathing glare. "I can't believe you."

Faux innocence crept onto his face. "Whatever do you mean? I haven't done anything."

You crossed the room and shoved at him. "Out." You pushed him back down the hall and to the open front door. "Get out of my house."

"Wow. Eager aren't we?" He winked at you.

"Eager to get my revenge. Veritas will love the video I have of you drunk and blubbering about how much you miss him," you said. Then you slammed the door in his face.

As soon as the door shut, Sunday called for you from the bedroom. You'd heard him use a sickly sweet tone with clients before, but this one lacked the venom that usually accompanied it. It was like he was singing each syllable of your name, savoring the way each sound rolled off his tongue.

"I need to type up my resignation," you muttered to yourself. You could handle Sunday in the beginning when he was standoffish and paranoid, but there was no way you were making it through this.

You walked back to the room, willfully overlooking the way his hanging wings straightened up when you reappeared in the doorway. You stopped a few feet in front of him, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.

"Hey," you said softly. "Let's get you to bed, alright?"

Sunday blinked at you, then looked down at the comforter under his fingers. "I am at the bed."

You snorted. "Well, we should get you under the covers."

His nose scrunched in displeasure. "No. It's too warm for that."

You sighed. There was no point in arguing with him in this state. "Alright, then. Lay down, and make sure to stay on your side. If you feel sick, there's a trash can right here by the bed. If you need anything else, I'll be down the hall."

You turned to leave, but his hand caught your wrist with surprising speed. He stared up at you with wide eyes. "Where are you going?"

You tilted your head at him. "Um, to bed?"

His brow furrowed slightly, the way it usually did when he was in deep thought. "But this is your bed."

"Yes, it is." You slipped your wrist out of his grasp, but he caught you again by the fingers. "I'm going to sleep on the couch. I won't be far."

The hold he had on your fingers was tighter than you thought. You pulled away, expecting to be freed, but tripped a bit when the rest of your body didn't follow your legs. He pulled you toward him and tumbled forward, falling onto the bed. He moved over and drew you closer to him, draping one of his wings across your waist and legs.

You didn't know if your heart had stopped, or was just beating so fast you couldn't feel it.

"Um, Sunday," you said, the rest of your words coming out as a babbled mess. You tried to untangle yourself from him, but he just clung on to you, refusing to let go.

"Please don't leave me," he mumbled.

You finally managed to put enough distance between you two that you could look him in the eye. "Sunday," you said, "you're drunk. You're going to regret this in the morning."

He frowned. "I will not regret something I've dreamed of doing for months."

In the end, it was neither. You were certain your heart was beating so hard it burst, and now you were dead. When you tried pulling away again, he placed a hand on your cheek, freezing you in place.

"Please," he whispered. "Just give me five minutes."

The desperation in his voice whittled away at the rest of your resistance. You settled down on the mattress, allowing him to hold you but not getting close enough for it to be considered cuddling. Staring at the ceiling in silence, you mulled over his words.

He was dreaming about cuddling, or intimate touch of some sort. It shouldn't be surprising that a twenty-seven year old man longed for that kind of companionship, but whenever other members of The Family had brought up him not having found a partner yet, he always shrugged them off. You figured it was because he generally wasn't interested in finding someone, but maybe it was just that he didn't want the rest of The Family involved in something as personal as his love life.

"I can talk to Robin about suggesting eligible suitors for you, if you want," you said. "We can even outsource their background checks to the IPC. Aventurine will be annoying about it, but I'm sure he'll agree to do it."

There was a long stretch of silence. Sunday finally spoke just as you'd begun to regret your words. "Why would you do that?"

You looked at him, confused. "You said you've dreamed of this."

"Yes," he said, "I did say that."

Was he really going to make you spell it out for him? Well, it had to be more embarrassing for him than it was for you. "If you desire... intimacy, it's only natural we start looking for potential suitors for you."

His eyes darkened, and a slight scowl pulled at his lips. At least this face was familiar: disappointment.

"I just told you I've dreamed of this," he muttered.

You nodded in agreement. "You've dreamed of holding someone."

"I've dreamed of holding you."

Oh. That complicated things.

You swallowed back a fit of nervous laughter. Your face felt like it was going to melt off. "I'm sorry." Your voice came out as hardly more than a croak. "I wasn't aware that's what you meant."

He leaned forward, eyes earnest. "Do you still want to look for other suitors for me?"

You considered your words carefully. "Not if it's something you don't want."

He hummed, then laid his head against the pillow. His breath fanned over your face as he spoke. It smelled like mint and whiskey. "Do you want to be my suitor?"

You pulled your gaze away from his lips and to his eyes. You didn't even know how your eyes got there. "I think you should ask me again when you're sober."

He studied your face for a long moment, then let his eyes flutter shut. "Fair enough," he said.

You laid there for a moment, allowing your heart rate to come back down and letting yourself take him in. His lips were slightly parted, even breaths slipping through them as sleep claimed him. His face wings twitched ever so often, usually followed by a twitch of the larger wing still wrapped around you.

You weren't certain how long you stayed there, just studying him, but at some point your blinks had grown heavier and you were fighting to keep your eyes open. You gave one last shove against Sunday's arm and wing to try and free yourself, but even unconsciously, his resolve could not be shaken. He huffed at the disturbance and buried his face further into the pillow. His wing tightened around you as he tried to curl in on himself, dragging you closer to him.

You sighed and rested your head on the pillow again. It was going to be impossible to get away from him now that his limbs were heavy with sleep. Knowing it was futile to try again, you let your eyes slip shut. You shifted into a more comfortable position, moving one of your arms to rest on top of the wing.

Five minutes, you lied to yourself. I'll try again in five minutes.

[seokka0o]

박원빈 - Park Wonbin 🐉contain:Smut;unprotected sex; nipple play // remembering that English is not my first language, so it may have some grammatical errors

Your temper was very difficult to manage at times, a little unstable when dealing with certain frustrations and in fact you understand that it's not something you can handle alone, stressful days tend to be longer, the ones that make you drag yourself around alone waiting for it to end. Not luckily, you have your boyfriend, Wonbin is never the type to question you too much, especially if he sees you cross the door of his apartment sulking, with your head down, not making light of it, but he knows that at some point it will pass, you would come to him anyway, so he will intend to watch television, because if you wanted to talk, you would have done so as soon as you got home.

But in return, he'll make sure you forget about your problem by fucking you like crazy.

His fingers were soft, against your flesh, massaging gently, making everything inside you compress, Wonbin would break your legs quite easily, but given your condition it was justifiable. He entered, over your body and then he slipped inside without prey, smiling as he noticed the expressions lost in your pleasure, he had bright eyes, like two billiard balls. The hands that used to twist the skin of your thighs going up inside the T-shirt -which, by the way, was his - that you were wearing, reaching your chest, to massage so shamelessly running his thumb over your nipples, making them bristle just to get a twinge in his own dick by the feel of the hard nipple scraping across his long fingers.

"I'll take care of your frustrations, don't worry" his intention is not to be proper, kind, Wonbin would like to secure some approvals before he becomes who he really is and you'd like to say that you didn't happen to feel the first violent twinge . Wonbin just started to give a good acceleration, with the intention of making you forget any frustrations at any cost, your moans came out involuntary, even though he had no intention of keeping them repressed from the beginning, your back bending with the intense waves and contractions, you didn't know how he managed to keep the thrusts going for so long, from making you gasp and biting your own lip to the air that was starting to leave your lungs "there you go, putting everything else aside to focus on how good my dick does you "

He proved it as always, lowering his own change, slowing down so he could kiss your jaw, making fun while listening to you whimper weakly "want to come for me, honey? Are you desperate for this already?" he asks still depositing some seals by your neck , going up to your face, his hands still under your t-shirt playing with your nipples, but without moving his hips, letting you move yours almost desperately. His lips touching yours is affectionate, delicate seals, pressed subtly, to make a caress, sometimes wonbin sucks your bottom lips with his , smiling as soon as you exchange some eye contact "are you desperate enough?" He's a sadist, definitely, and you might agree that he is.

"please, I really need to come, wonbin" so there's his answer, serving as fuel for all that fire that seemed endless, wonbin pulled his body away from yours and then he went back to fuck you at the same frequency as before. Sliding inside you, muttering every time you moaned his name, each time louder than the other "f-fuck, I'm almost Bin, please continue"

You shouldn't use nicknames like that, wonbin's skin crawling was the sign of his evil in teasing him, because right after he let out a breathless groan, feeling that he could also be close to him. Hands now going down to your hips he used absolute support, to take you to the sky as fast as he could, your flesh losing and your eyes rolling until you finally reached your limit, letting your whole body give in to then soon feeling your entire insides fill with wonbin's liquids and then it falls onto your lap, completely exhausted.

[skemford]

I like talking about bendy characters so it’s time to touch up topic of… Joey Drew himself

Doing it before fade to black release on purpose :)

Here’s my analysis of his behaviour and on the illusion of living philosophy

It’s a huge read and I’ve enjoyed writing it!

(Continuation under the cut)

1. Joey’s family situation was hard on it’s own

Joey doesn’t talk about his parents way too much and mostly focuses on story elements (his father being a shoe maker and how his parents affected his childhood) rather than on his parents as their own people.

They weren’t rich and Joey talks about their family earning a “honest living” but at the same time, he describes how hard it was for his father.

“We weren’t rich. There was an honest living to be earned and Father did that with Mother keeping the books” (TIOL, page 18)

“I definitely saw her (mother) more than I saw Father, who sometimes would only appear briefly at the dinner table, hunched, brow furrowed, silently eating his meal. He’d disappear downstairs right after, and I’d help Mother with the washing up. (TIOL,page 18)

He comments on his father creating fake scenarios (elves helping him to work) to distract from hardship of needing to work a lot to be able to feed their family.

Joey has hard time of understanding ‘why’ he does that and how fantasy can help to work but he wants to believe. He tries to prove to himself that magic can be real.

"I didn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it” (TIOL, page 19)

“I couldn’t see the elves. They must have been sitting on the table itself, hidden behind Father. I pushed the door open just a little bit and stood taller on my tiptoes.” (TIOL, page 21)

Joey switches between wanting to believe in illusions and not wanting to. He’s scared of not being perceived as normal by others.

He says that it’s not okay to be deep into the fantasy but notes on the fact that he can grasp the concept.

“I knew about make-believe. Played it all the time with my friends. But I didn’t know that adults knew about make-believe too. I nodded. (TIOL, page 23)

After he asks his father directly, he explains his reasoning and says that make-believe helps to feel less lonely (I’ll note on this part, it’ll come in handy later) which changes Joey’s perspective greatly:

"But the make-believe, the little characters, the songs, that changed his reality. What was reality except what we perceive it to be? Elves and magic? Well, why not? (TIOL, page 24)

It’s everything we’ve got to know about his family.

Hard working to earn money for living, using escapism to cope and distant from each other because of their struggles.

This distance likely has continued to grow with years, since for some reason he escaped his home when he was 15 y.o (+ signed up to army); no one seems to actually care and he was left on his own.

1.1 Stage name

Talking about Joey’s distance from his family, he doesn’t use his real family surname or full form of his name.

It’s not something that was explored a lot in Bendy (among all of its content) but we know that he doesn’t like to be referred this way.

'Joey’ was a nickname that he picked up for himself when he was 19 y.o.

"I’m Detective Adam Sinclair. You’re Joseph Drew.” “Joey,” I said. It was a new nickname I was trying out, ever since I moved to the Village. (TIOL, page 88)

Usually he’s referred as 'Joseph’ by his family members or people who are distant to him/don’t know him well.

But "Joey” is not the only one name he gave to himself.

'Drew’ doesn’t look like a real surname. He likely picked it up after getting close with Henry.

Imo Drew is a fun pun name that’s related to Joey owning the studio (and “Joey drew Studios” (literally) in the case of the cycle)

It has never sounded real.

Employees handbook mentions some “Dempsey” person who invests their own costs into the studio:

(Receipts: Investor Deposit, J. Dempsey)

Their initials are “J.D.” which makes it’s obvious who they are.

Joey’s house also doesn’t look rich which would make sense if he put all his earnings into the studio itself.

Bendy devs like to pick names that fit characters & “Dempsey” means “arrogant person” which does fit Joey perfectly.

1.2 Joey is deeply ashamed of the way his family lived.

Everytime someone mentions anything he associates with his past (shoes, for example) he overthinks and creates imaginary conflicts with these people.

His negative thoughts about them take whole paragraphs of text; he tries to make himself believe that he doesn’t care about looking “less” in someone’s eyes. He looks for reasons why they're worse than him constantly.

"Probably trying to figure out my past, and that was none of his business. Then I told myself it didn’t matter because I didn’t care what he thought. I didn’t care much for him in general. He might have been richer than me at the time, but that’s where his superiority ended." ( TIOL, page 26)

He often downplays people because he's deeply insecure and is scared of being outcasted, especially by rich successful guys.

After doing so,he switches toward praising himself and names reasons for why he's better (classic Joey Drew behaviour)

He was a year younger than me, hadn’t fought, hadn’t signed up like I had, hadn’t lied about his age to fight for his country like I had. What could he say to an answer like that?Nothing. Absolutely nothing (TIOL, page 26)

Не believes that they need to feel sorry for this because they have no idea how much he struggled in the past.

2. He's insecure & scared of things he can't control

I could've continues this in previous paragraph but it's a bit different.

You see, while Joey was insecure of his past (things he associated with it acted as "triggers") he still was full of himself.

It was an act but it looked convincing enough; with time it became harder for him to keep it up.

It easily explains his behaviour in batim tapes.

When Joey tries to reassure everyone that he knows what's going on, he actually doesn't. He's as lost as everyone else, he tries to act only when he's forced to do so.

He lies to people and runs away from responsibility because he's scared of abruptness, something out of his control.

Joey shows fear of everything that's unknown to him but he tries to play it off somehow: he tries to be on top and be unpredictable to others.

He treats himself as a human that lives around unpredictable fictional characters that he can't control or read intentions of.

"My father though was a real person. I knew that deep down. But in this moment I saw him not as a son looking at his father but as a viewer looking at a fictional character." (TIOL, page 50)

It's mentioned in the novels that Joey likes theatre and he expresses his thoughts about it to Buddy in dctl.

Theatre operates in "cycles":

Actors play their parts→ the audience applaud→ actors bow→ performance ends→ performance begins and so on.

It's has a pattern and won't introduce anything that will caught you off guard. It's "safe" and as a part of audience,you don't need to perform, you only watch.

Does it remind you of batim's cycle? Outside of holding grudges toward Henry and wanting to run away from everything Joey has performed with GENT, he also searches for control while not being included directly.

HE decides what will happen to the cycle residents. HE writes the story that other people can barely affect. HE blames other people for studio's downfall and makes them suffer for his wrongdoings.

Joey knows that he has failed but he can't process it. He doesn't know what will happen and he's scared of being put into situations he can't predict.

It's really shows how insecure he became with years.

3. Why Henry is important?

Why exactly Joey couldn't replace one man he didn't knew for a really long time? What made Henry so special to him?

We don't get a big insist on their friendship but it can be said that their short-lived bond was strong or at least Joey believed that it was.

Henry seems to be Joey's role model of sort even if Joey doesn't want to acknowledge it.

Joey notes on how Henry changed the course of his life without knowing about this

Henry is a determinated man who went for a career in art because he knew what he wanted & he stayed on this path no matter how hard it was to get any recognition.

Henry's the man who makes decisions and acts when he needs to.

Meanwhile, Joey feels lost his whole life. He searches for answers,purpose or a place with a "soul".

Henry gave him new meaning for life. Creative path with endless possibilities that Joey could build from scratch.

Joey was heartbroken when Henry left, doesn't matter for hard he tries to act like he wasn't.

"His presence was helpful, I can happily admit, but his absence was even more so. Not having him at the studio ended up being one of the best things that could have happened to it" (TIOL, page 138)

For some time his life was revolving around Henry. He knew what to do and what will happen, Henry always pushed him to the right decisions.

He says so directly in batim chapter 5:

"The truth is, you were always so good at pushing, old friend... pushing me to do the right thing"

With loosing Henry, Joey lost his newly gained purpose in life. It wasn't something that he was able to figure out by himself & it made him blind to the road that lies ahead.

He's angry at Henry for being like "other people" that he hates. For leaving him behind when he's scared of being alone.

We don't know about Henry's perspective much but he strikes me as someone who would be supportive of Joey at first.

He made some of Joey's ideas real and left only after a breaking point.

3.1 "Cartoon family"

Joey is deeply attached to main JDS toons that he "mutually" owns with Henry.

Especially, it's noteciable with toon Bendy who was called his child on a couple of occasions:

"Bendy was Joey’s child, and he felt just as strongly about Bendy as I feel about my flesh-and-blood son" © Nathan Arch (TIOL, page 5)

"He was my very first creation—one could even call him my firstborn." (TIOL, page 12)

Joey not only sees Bendy as his child but he also relates to him.

He draws parallels between them both, calls bendy manifestation of "the illusion of living" and shows some of his mannerisms (as he says)

Joey wants to see himself as Bendy.

A character who's loved by kids and adults alike and who always has friends around.

"I tell people that Bendy is the perfect example of my philosophy." (TIOL, page 12)

"To know that I needed a creation so perfect, so accessible to so many people, that it would help me change the way the world saw itself." (TIOL, page 13)

In Joey's apartment the only one picture in frame that he owns is illustration/animation cell of toons drawn by 'Henry Stein':

They're depicted holding hands with Bendy being in the middle of both; it's portrays closeness between them and Bendy's importance in the picture

But was it's actually signed up by Henry or Joey is the one who did it for himself?

We know from batim (and batdr notes) that Joey's signature is "your best pal" which makes this case...a bit complicated

Joey could've wanted to pretend that Henry is still close to him and decided to sign up drawing with his name

Or possibly it was signed up by Henry somewhere in the past. In this case, Joey could've adopted Henry's signature as his own.

Both speculations have place to be real and we can't prove any of them.

Joey's known for pretending (which would fit with the 1st possibility) but he's also stuck in the past and stole a lot of ideas that belong to other people.

Imo it can be interpreted based on the way you see him.

4. Why was Susie fired?

Joey's obsessed with everything that is related to Bendy which can be seen with him being angry about "crooked bendy dolls" or bendy expression sheet in batim ch 2.

We can speculate that Susie Campbell wasn't fired from the role of Alice's voice actress for any valid reason BUT because Joey felt personally offended.

As Norman says in dctl, Alice Angel was really popular for a bit, which possibly could have been unacceptable for Joey.

Bendy is the main character Joey relates to and he wouldn't have wanted to be overshadowed in any way.

Susie being fired and humiliated (for not knowing that she was in fact fired) is the consequence of Joey's insecurity.

Susie claims that "she was absolutely perfect for the role" at first so at some point Joey completely changed his perspective.

Any character getting attention would be good for the studio. Firing a voice actress that helps to get this attention lacks logical reasoning.

After Joey "calms down" he has a conversation with Susie about 'an opportunity' he has for her. This opportunity is Susie being the first (speculated to) human sacrifice. He believed that she'd have been a perfect Alice.

Joey puts Bendy above Boris and Alice (like he does with himself & other people) so him acting pitiful about any other character getting popular does makes sense.

But he still cares about them...to some degree.

"Boris was special, Alice was complicated." (TIOL, page 154)

Joey having complicated feelings with Alice as character is really interesting and it's perfectly reflects what he was thinking about Susie.

She was a perfect voice actress to others but wasn't to him. He thought that she'll be a perfect Alice (after the ink machine was created) but she failed to be.

"She was beautiful. And loved by all. She was perfect...No matter what Joey says." (batim chapter 3, Susie talking about herself in 3rd person)

In dctl he claims that he relates failed experiments to "people not being real enough" or says that they weren't pure.

At the end, Joey basically has decided to pretend that she never was real

Susie is never mentioned in his memoir and she's almost fully erased from studio's history.

In Batdr's studio tour (music department part) "Susie Campbell" was replaced with "Allison Pendle"; meaning that Allison is officially the only one Alice Angel voice actress according to him.

5. The ink demon

It's one of the most interesting parts here and I'm sure that a lot of people have talked about him better that I'll.

The ink demon is a "product" of mistreatment, Joey's unhealthy projecting and capitalism (duh)

Joey saw Bendy as his son

He wanted to be like Bendy, someone who's loved and can always escape from troubles

One of reasons to bring Bendy to life is his marketability. Joey wanted "alive attractions" he can get money from.

The ink demon wasn't able to fullfil any expectations that Joey had.

He was passive and harmless (at first) but to Joey, he's not a cheerful toon that he has always dreamed about.

One of main issues that Joey has with him is that he's off-model:

"Listen Tommy, i know you boys over at Gent are doing your best but I'm paying for living attractions,not walking abominations. Whatever that grinning thing was i saw walking around your office,you better keep it up locked tight! Might scare off investors!..." (batim chapter 5)

"Grinning thing" and "walking abomination." The ink demon is completely dehumanised because he's not marketable.

As it was mentioned earlier, Joey sees Bendy as a perfect being and relates to him

He doesn't want to relate to the ink demon; for this reason, he separates them both.

Joey has hard time with accepting "failures". They either get forgotten, dumped or he tries to change them somehow.

The ink demon is a mistake that Joey and GENT have tried to "fix" for years. "A monster" that has shattered Joey's dreams.

5.1 The ink demon's sense of self

It's Joey character analysis so this point won't be too big.

The ink demon was treated like a mistake for being different:

Closed off, isolated, put in the cycle,tortured.

He was in the place where no one would care because he's not "a perfect bendy". Most of it comes from Joey or is related to him in some way.

Everyone saw him as a monster and he has accepted this role.

We know how it went in batim/batdr.

Worth to mention that unlike Joey, he has never lied in batdr. It's either harsh truth or projecting.

6. Ink Children

Allison was close to Joey and had a good impact on him,as he claims.

Indirectly, she made him want to have a family with the help of the ink machine.

I doubt that this decision has come from the place of jealousy toward Henry (who has a family) unless future content will somehow prove that I'm wrong. Joey can have one good intention while failing everywhere else.

Joey could've wanted to have a family to prove that there's still something good in him.

He was scared of dying alone and being forgotten.

"I hadn’t known that at the time. It gave me chills. The thought of success only after death, now that terrified me. That was not the plan and would never be the plan" (TIOL, page 122)

We don't know how many children have perished until the final, perfect one. And we can't claim what exactly has happened to them.

We don't get much details about the creation process of artificial "almost humans".

The only one we heard (outside of Audrey) is "AD" (name of the file) from batim chapter 5

"Tell me another one,uncle Joey..." ("AD" in batim post credits)

And sadly,you can't say much based on this.

They could've been physically unstable and die on their own terms

(milk packages from Joey's kitchen table in batim chapter 5. All of them were stained with ink)

If they stained object with ink by interacting with them, it could've become worse with time.

Again,with lack of context,it's almost impossible to debate for or against this idea. Was that's a thing for other ink creatures?

Susie does brings up in batim that she was "a shapeless slug" at first.

Joey didn't changed much and dumped imperfect ones

Honestly this part depends on how much you believe that he could grow as a character.

(memo from batdr, GENT building)

The way Joey talks about "other versions" sounds... indifferent.

Which is weird, because he did spend time with "AD" from batim by entertaining her with stories when she has asked him to

Does he tries to justify them being dumped OR he's distracting from the fact that they didn't had a chance to properly exist?

It feels like it was left for interpretation on purpose.

6.1 Audrey Drew

Second and last artificial child after "AD" that we canonically know about.

For Joey, creating something perfect that will outlive him could've been a key to his definition of immortality. He wanted to leave something after his death that people could know about. A piece of "perfect art"

"...Of course, I intend to live forever, so that will never happen! Ha, a joke indeed, but in a way not a joke, for what is art but a doorway into immortality? The greatest Illusion of Living then, living on after we are no longer alive. What is more of an illusion than that?" (TIOL, page 219)

Joey makes jokes about living eternally even before the ink machine's existence.

After it's creation, it's wasn't something that he has planned but he was ready for this fate (for one reason or another)

At the end of his life, Audrey has became a thing he'll live through eternally. And Memory!Joey is here ig

Memory!Joey basically calls Audrey his magnum opus:

"...My Greatest creation" (batdr, final Memory!Joey custscene)

Which further established that Joey is more proud of Audrey than he ever was on the Bendy franshise (it's hard to be proud of the stolen ideas, peoples deaths or the cycle,eh?)

Audrey seems to share adventurous spirit of young Joey (in his early 20s) & determination

They both got dragged into events they didn't asked for:

Joey (when he was 19 y.o) by detective Sinclair who has blamed him for a murder.

Audrey by Wilson Arch who has wanted to murder her.

6.2 Audrey and the ink demon

Similar trauma, different outcomes and treatment.

How present Joey was in Audrey's life? Why did they got separated at one point even before he has died?

Is there's something Memory!Joey hides from Audrey on purpose?

Batdr archives mention that Audrey has repressed her memories but what and why exactly?

In batdr the ink demon interacts a lot with Audrey which holds huge significance on the story.

In his first interaction with her he says "ink speaks to me and whispers your secrets" so the ink machine (who seems to hold some sense of identity) does know too.

The ink demon heavily relates to Audrey through the game. They were both left alone (in different ways) and they share one creator.

"You are without the purpose. Your very existence.. was a terrible lie...you're a mistake. A monster. Just like me." (batdr, the ink demon, last playable segment)

He heavily projects on her through this last interaction. Audrey does has a purpose,she was created to be a daughter Joey did wanted and loved. As much as Joey Drew could love at least, if you see this part as debatable.

But there's one thing he's right about, her existence is a lie.

Joey put burden of "protecting the cycle" on her while she thought that she's an orphan.

Batdr archives also question how much agency she has, which i find interesting.

7. "The illusion of living" (or TL;DR for this analysis)

The art of lying masterfully and manual on how to justice God complex.

Joey describes his life from early childhood (when he was 5 y.o.) and to the point of him being 42-43 y.o., a bit before the ink machine was created.

This book is about a man who couldn't find his purpose in life even with the help of other people and decided to blame everyone for this.

Lies, accusations, insults, distorted information, searching for "a soul" (literally and figuratively) and never ending hidden sadness after he lost Henry.

He tries to replace this empty gap with letting their creations become his whole life but it doesn't end well... (the ink demon,dead employees and the cycle)

He tries to separate himself from this and focused on creating a family.

Artificial daughters are electric boogalo №2 (unexpected direct sequel) which has ended working somehow.

But still,i wouldn't trust this man even a pet rock and the ink demon & Audrey are a proof on 'why.'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Trivial facts (bendy employees handbook/the illusion of living):

>He loves mac n cheese

>Joey meet Sammy at a theatre when they were teens

>Joey loves throwing peanuts at theatre actors

>In Joey Drew studios you can celebrate only main toons birthday or Joey's birthday. Other birthdays are prohibited.

>Joey stole award that Sammy has earned

> Joey officially is an employee of the month eternally...

> Joey stoles ideas for cartoons from employees and they don't get even a couple of cents for this (woah! How surprising /j)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Special thanks to everyone who interacted with my Audrey analysis earlier!

[magiarec]

🆘🏠 WE NEED SAFE HOUSING.

We moved across Canada last year to escape severe medical abuse, but our living situation rapidly degraded. Our next door neighbour is a violent racist homophobe who has dedicated the last year of my life to harrassing us. More details will be under the cut. After months of searching we finally found a new apartment an hour away, and can have it any time in the next two weeks as long as we have the money. We do not have that much money. We can cover moving costs, the remainder of rent on our current place, and all our normal medical/etc bills. We've asked family for help and gotten a resounding "bootstraps" from them. Mutual aid is my only hope.

Our triad is LGBT (what, all at once? yes!), severely mentally ill, two of us are disabled, and one of us is latina. I'm currently still trapped waiting on a reply from immigration, legally can't work yet, and I don't feel safe doing sex work here when an arrest could mean deportation.

🌈 ♿ £0/2000

total cost: deposit (600), rent (1200), eating this month (200)

Here’s what we’ve been trying to get away from for a year. TW for racism, homophobia, slurs, child abuse, assault, graphic violent/sexual threats, sexual harrassment, fatphobia, the police having to get involved, and anything else that I can add if you need. I’m going to list these in the order they happened.

• Tried to break into our house during a four hour long extended breakdown. Hammered on the door til it dented. Threatened all of our lives multiple times. This went on until 2am. First police report.

• Spent a week hammering on our door or window and screaming “WAKE UP” at any time between 4-6am if she heard us using the kitchen the night before.

• Followed me up and down the road when I ran errands calling me a disgusting pig, the d slur, and a pedophile. Followed all of us down the road more than once screaming at us for being worthless [d slur]s while she was a mother.

• Told her children I was a pedophile, and that I might kidnap them one day. Loudly. In front of their friends. Described in graphic detail what she assumed I would do to them if I did.

• Waited on our doorstep for me and pulled out a fistful of my hair when I tried to push past her to get inside. I have not left the house alone since. Second police report.

• Multiple months of her waiting until after midnight to begin blasting religious sermons or the same fucking eminem song six times through our conjoining walls.

• Began weighing our fire escape grates down while screaming at us that she’d burn us alive to ready us for hell.

• Waited until I was home alone and then came up to the door and began calmly telling me that she’d, quote, “cut my clit off” before offering to bring her guy friends over to rape me straight.

• Taped naked photos of herself to our bedroom window.

• Brought a fucking ant infestation into the basement apartments we split and tried to punch me in the face when I told the inspector we’d been putting down traps and all of the bugs came from her side of the building.

• Chased my husband down the side of our house, spat on his face, and tried (almost succeeded before we both tackled it shut) to kick the door open. Third police report that they actually bothered to come out for, and the first one where the officer who arrived took the genuine threats and physical assault seriously.

It’s going on trial tomorrow. Our landlord has had months to evict her for the assults, or not paying rent, or the harrassment, or the way she keeps threatening to shoot his family and calling them the N word. He has told her instead that we’re “probably” moving out soon for the past year and she insists she’s staying until that point - a thing we found out this week when confronting him about her still being here. We also found out that his plan to rent us her bigger unit is contingent on us furnishing it and leaving it for two months when his family comes to stay for a wedding in August.

We also also found out that when the baliffs said they can’t evict her until he does [basic legal step that she could contest] [... that he could have done last year] he decided it wasn’t worth it. So he’s going to illegally evict her. By waiting u til she leaves next week, unlocking her unit, loading her belongings into a van, changing the locks, and installing a gate. His plan is to have her arrested for tresspassing when she tries to come back to her house.

This is insane. It is not legal, it’s deeply unethical even if I hate her ass, and there is no way in hell that she will not just blame us for it when it happens. My husband leaves for work at 4am. She knows this. I am dead fucking certain she will attack him or us before the week is out if we remain here. I am terrified and traumatized and need your help. Please, please help.

[madschiavelique]

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ . ★ . ჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻

<< Click here if you want to go back to chapter 1

Choice B : Accept and take a shor tour of the surrounding area

content warnings : none word count : 1,7k masterlist of the fic : here.

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ . ★ . ჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻

It has to be said that you don't know much about the city, just as you don't know anyone here apart from your caretaker. Getting closer to Hobie and becoming his friend would be really reassuring in such an unfamiliar environment.

What about the delivery men? Well, they'd leave your things with the concierge, who'd keep them safe until you got back. It's no big deal, maybe you could even ask Hobie to help you put your stuff back together.

"I'm in, " you confirm.

"OK, let's start with the most important thing."

So the first destination is the music store. Hobie obviously knows the salesman well. So you learn that he belongs to - or rather is a member of, given that he wants to detach himself from any affiliation whatsoever - a band. You find out a bit more about the group, how he's the lead guitarist and that his friend Gwen, who's also a student at your university, is the drummer.

The next destination is a small, inexpensive convenience store. He knows there's a mall not too far away, but since every temple of consumerism is to be avoided at all costs, he shows you this one. You take the opportunity to do a bit of shopping in his presence, just to fill your fridge and cupboards up a bit so you don't go hungry tonight and tomorrow morning.

You share a packet of biscuits as he shows you the bar where he and Gwen tend to perform. He greets the waiters, people seem to generally like him, although the looks he gets thrown his way aren't always appreciative. But of course these same glances go right over his head, he doesn't give a damn.

The visit continues, the two of you chatting and laughing. The sun covers you both in orange as you finally reach the front door of your building, observing it. It's obviously not your first time here, but you can't help but feel that this place is going to be your home.

"Are you free for the next five minutes?" you ask Hobie.

"I'm free for the rest of my life," he corrects, "but I'm available now if that's what you're asking."

You tell him about the plan to move your boxes upstairs, and he agrees. The relief of not having to go back and forth between all the floors runs way too many times travels through your arms, encouraging them to hold on for the few weights you'll have to carry.

You swipe your building badge over the sensor and enter the Hall. You knock on the concierge's door, and he opens it and smiles at you. He's a kindly old man with a smile that never leaves his face.

"Ah, there you are. I tried to hold back the delivery boys because I didn't know if you'd arrive at the same time as them, but I didn't manage it," he says with a little shrug.

"It doesn't matter," you assure him. "My friend here is going to help me bring it all up." Hobie gives a little wave.

Although your concierge is old, he doesn't seem in the least bit shocked or judgmental of Hobie's style.

"What a nice gesture on your part, young man," he smiles as he goes out and grabs his set of keys. "I've had the boxes placed in one of the cubbyholes.

He guides you to the storage area and opens it, revealing the six boxes that have been deposited in a narrow room.

"Here they are," he turns to you, "don't forget to come and see me when you've finished so I can close it again."

"Thank you very much," you say simply as you grab the first two stacked boxes, elevating them as best you can. "We won't take too long."

"Take all the time you need," he laughs as he walks away, "the building's not going anywhere soon."

So begins the little move of all your stuff.

You've managed to get everything upstairs, along with your groceries, and you're on the ground after all that effort. You hand him a bottle of water, still fresh from the shop.

"I can't thank you enough for your help," you breathe out as he takes a sip.

"Don't mention it, you're the least depreciating person I've met in a while."

The remark makes you smile.

"Well, that's not all, but I'm not going to stay long," he says as he stands up, rubbing his hands together as if to dust them off.

You take him back downstairs, you exchange numbers, and he says goodbye one last time before leaving. You tell the concierge that you've finished your little move, and head back upstairs to your flat. It's empty, and while you still have a bit of energy left, you decide to inflate your mattress.

You don't have an air pump, so you have to use your mouth. During your interminable, head-spinning puffing session, you think back over the day, your meeting with the teachers who seem to be really great, and the very pleasant late afternoon you've had...

Oh, but you haven't met your neighbour yet! Perhaps it's time you pay him a visit and introduce yourself.

You quickly finish inflating your mattress and get up. You have nothing to offer for your arrival, and hope that it won't spoil your meeting.

You check your appearance in the bathroom mirror, just to make sure you look presentable, and leave your flat to take just a few steps to the opposite landing.

You knock on the door. You wonder what kind of neighbour you're going to have; all you know is that it's a man who lives there.

There's no way it's going to be someone too old on these floors, which reassures you. If you ever invited someone to your flat, like friends for a simple party, not necessarily with loud music, he'd be more understanding.

Another student perhaps? It wasn't impossible, on the contrary. The rent here wasn't too expensive surprisingly, and it was well placed for the university. If your neighbour was indeed someone around your age or a student, that would be reassuring.

But the man who opened the door for you was neither, and your heart froze by a burn along with your whole body.

A man in his late twenties, with your head barely reaching his shoulders, opened the door. His brown hair, swaying between the wet and dry of the shower he'd finished two minutes ago, fell over his brown eyes, which looked at you quizzically.

His towel in hand, still rubbing his hair, gives you a glimpse not only of his contracted biceps, which must easily approach the size of your own head, but also of the veins running down the back of his hand.

When your eyes return to his, he is still waiting for you to explain the reason for your visit.

"Hello," you greet, pulling yourself together as your mind hurries to rearrange your heart in your chest instead of your eyes, you present yourself with your name before you add “I've just moved into the flat next door," you point to it with your thumb behind your shoulder, your door still open.

He suddenly seems to understand and opens his lips to nod an Ah.

"Welcome," he says, holding out his hand, "I'm Miguel O'Hara."

Miguel, then, you think. But your thoughts go blank as you grab his hand and squeeze, the size of it almost completely encompassing yours.

"Pleased to meet you, Mr O'Hara," you smile.

"Please, call me Miguel," he says, leaning against the doorway of his flat, crossing his arms.

Is it even human to have so much beauty and aura that attracts you? Is it because of your air session with the mattress that you feel this way, or is it the effect he gives you that makes your head spin and sends stars to the back of your skull ?

"Have you got it all arranged yet?" he questions, pointing to your door with his chin.

"No, no, I haven't," you sigh, "All I've got at the moment is a humble air mattress."

"No box spring?" he asks, frowning.

"No, I'm hoping for a proper mattress in a month's time, along with a chest of drawers and some shelves. Once the movers have put everything in place, it'll be a nice little craft day for me," you joke softly.

"If you need any help, I could help you put it all together," he offers.

You're slightly surprised, the kindness and politeness with which you're chatting putting you at ease. You wouldn't have expected such generosity when you first arrived here.

Decidedly, this educational renewal was perhaps the best decision you ever made in your life to cross paths with so many nice people.

"I don't want to be a bother," you say, wrinkling your nose.

"No, really, I insist," he smiles.

Your eyebrows raise slightly, and you smile not politely this time but sincerely.

"Very well then," you say, biting the inside of your cheek. "I don't know how to thank you for this."

"No te preocupes," he says, waving it off gracefully.

A beep and a buzz sound. Miguel pulls his mobile out of his pocket, and sighs, a sudden look of exasperation placed on his face.

"Duty calls. Speaking of which, can you give me your number? It'll be easier if you ever have a problem."

Two phone numbers in one day? That's a miracle.

"Of course," you say, taking the phone he's holding out to you and putting your contact on it.

Your fingers slightly graze each other, and the single feeling of it creates sparks in your hand.

You hand it back to him, he taps it, and a few seconds later you receive a simple "It's me.”

"I wonder who that could be," you joke as he smiles slightly and you save his number.

"It was nice to meet you," he says as he gives you one last wave, pronouncing your name with a smile on his lips, grabbing his door handle.

"Likewise, Miguel," you smile as you step back towards your door.

His door closes and you enter your flat.

You could only think of one thing: the way your name sounded from his lips.

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ . ★ . ჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻

Common end >>

[sacrificethemtothesquid]

Planning as an act of love

Okay, I’m going to get serious for a moment. I’m going to get very very graphic, but I want to emphasize exactly how important it is to TALK about end-of-life planning.

I live in Oregon, in the USA. I have no idea how it works in other states. I have no idea how it works in other countries. I just know what happened to me this week and I am so horrified and furious and frustrated that I need to scream into the void so that maybe, maybe, maybe my screaming can somehow prevent someone else from going through the same.

When my dad died, he died in a hospital. He was transferred to the morgue, and from there to the cremation service he and Mom had previously chosen. He and Mom knew the importance of planning ahead. They made their arrangements years ago and even put down deposits so that when the day came, all they would need to do is call a single phone number. Even though his death was sudden, the process went smoothly. He’s now five pounds of ash in a gorgeous burlwood box that Mom occasionally carries around the house. Eventually, he will be spread in Puget Sound according to his wishes. 

Simple. Straightforward. We do fire drills so that if the fire alarm goes off, our feet already know the distance to the rendezvous.  

My mother-in-law died on Thursday. Despite having a dementia diagnosis for fifteen years, she and my FIL didn’t make a single decision regarding end-of-life logistics. This resulted in her lying in her bed for TWELVE HOURS after her passing while FIL dithered about deciding on a funeral home. My husband, his sister and I went to the memory care place to collect her things, and she was still there. 

Have you ever seen anyone die? Do you want to know what it’s like? With Dad, his heartbeat lost cadence. We watched the pulse of his jugular, stark under his emaciated skin, as it stuttered out of time with his breath. He twitched as we held his hands, muscles straining as the signal faded, rallied, and faded again. We counted from a last breath, got to a minute, two minutes, and then he would gasp and we’d start over. Thirty seconds. One minute. Three minutes. Gasp. 

This went on for an afternoon. The sky was cloudless, a sharp cold February day brilliant as glacier ice. Sunlight flooded the room. We watched the clock. We watched his pulse. Mom held one of his hands. My sister held the other. I held theirs, my elbow making a dent in his edema-swollen calf. Spit and mucus congealed in his throat, each breath rasping in and out. This is what they call a death rattle. At exactly four o’clock, he gasped and we started our count again, but this time, we kept counting. Three minutes. Four minutes. Seven. Ten. I think my sister was the one who pressed the call button. The nurse came in and called the doctor to confirm he was gone. 

You know in your bones when someone is gone. It’s called an unnatural stillness, but death is a natural process. Stillness is the most natural part.

We weren’t there when my mother-in-law passed. This was a choice my husband and his sister made, and I respect that. Someone else brushed her hair and smoothed the blankets, arranging the tableau with thoughtful hands. Someone called hospice, who called us. “She’s gone,” they said, and in the next breath, asked about arrangements. There were none, and my father-in-law, overwhelmed and closed to suggestion, was legally the only one who could make the decision.

When we went to the memory care place, my mother-in-law was still there, lying in her bed in a carefully dark room. She was still. She was not sleeping. We took her things, silently packed up her sweaters and shirts and closed the door on a corpse. 

You know in your bones when someone is gone.

No one likes thinking about these things. It isn’t comfortable. It isn’t pleasant. Do you know what else isn’t pleasant? Scrolling through Google reviews with tears in your eyes. Looking at price lists because we live in a capitalist hellscape and it costs a great deal of money to die. Opening a website called Discount Cremation Services and then closing it immediately, because even though it’s five hundred dollars cheaper than the next option, you can’t bear to have your loved one processed in the same strip mall that sells used tires. Would you like to upgrade from a plastic urn to one of our more dignified options? How many copies of the death certificate do you need? Death has a bureaucracy: insurance, Social Security, property, banks and other financial institutions. Which ones require a notarized death certificate and which ones will accept a copy? 

I’m sorry for your loss. Will you be paying by credit or debit?

So get your shit together. Talk to your family. Talk to your friends. Find a list. Getting your affairs in order isn’t morbid. It’s an act of love. Do you know what you’d like done with your body when you die? Tell someone. Write it down. If you’re over a certain age and can pay ahead of time, do it. My parents used the Neptune Society. It was expensive, but worth every penny. 

Do you think you’re too young to be planning? You aren’t. What if you get hit by a car? What if you get cancer? Do you want the people who love you to be sitting together at a kitchen table with cold tea, desperately trying to remember if you ever mentioned that you wanted to be buried? Donated to science? What will happen to your cat? Your books? Who will close your bank account? Who will make your final Instagram post? 

Talk with your loved ones. Ask what they want. If they can afford it, have an estate lawyer look through their documents. Know the probate laws of your state. Do you know what power of attorney means? Or would you rather be holding a kleenex in your shaking hands as the customer service representative gently tells you you can’t access your dead parent’s bank account without it? 

We’re all right. We’re figuring things out. We’ve got each other and we’re muddling through. I just want to highlight the stark contrasts. It’s hard to talk about these things when everything is fine, but it’s worse to talk about them when everything isn’t. 

This isn’t suicidal. This isn’t morbid. It’s practical. It’s healthy. This is the fire drill. Know your exit. Please, please, please don’t wait until everything is on fire.

[thedeliverygod]

I need help, please.

Essentially back in 2021 when I filed for bankruptcy I used a feature my payroll for my company offers which is to “borrow” money from your following paycheck, I guess like a pay advance. I borrowed the full $500 amount in order to pay my court fees/lawyer fees so that I wouldn’t have to burden my dad.

I figured once my bankruptcy went through and I was no longer paying credit card bills every month, I could handle being short a paycheck a month or two while I bounced back. I tried my best, but life kept getting in the way. I had car problems come up, I had health problems come up. At my bankruptcy hearing in December they decided they wanted me to pay 2 more installments of the court fees early so that I wouldn’t have to go back a second time (I also had to hide my cell phone in the bush outside because they did not provide lockers and I had to worry about it getting stolen the whole time because I have no family/friends in the area to drive and drop me off but that’s another story).

Then my rent went up another $100 and inflation struck everything but especially groceries. I needed every drop of that $500 + the remainder of my paycheck in order to make sure everything got paid.

I won’t say I’ve been perfect and haven’t made unnecessary purchases. It’s a goddamn depressing world and I am trying to keep myself sane with little things.

I’ve sold a lot of “unnecessary” things in my life. Old video games and stuffed animals. Old movies. Old books. I tried to sell cosplays but I left them up on eBay for months with no bites.

I can go to the used book store maybe one or two more times with some things but I think that’s about all I can manage. I’m considering selling some of my Kingdom Hearts figure collection but I’d have to know I’d get a fair price of what they’re actually worth since a fair amount aren’t made anymore. But yeah, the bookstore offers me meager amounts for things so it I only helps so much. For instance I sold my ps3, some books, a Mai sakurajima figure and I think I got like $38 and a few dollars of store credit. Aka it helps but not much. I have an old diamond necklace from my ex boyfriend I’ve considered pawning but I don’t know if that would get me much either.

My mom just got home from a stint at the hospital; she’s relatively okay now but she was in the ICU for an infection, kidney damage and low blood pressure. The latter 2 were mainly from being dehydrated in combo with the infection so she’s mostly better in that regard at least enough to go home. She’s on disability and her husband is retired so they scrape by. My dad has been sick and not working for several months now with leg issues I don’t really know much about because he’s been very vague with me and won’t let me visit.

My parents can’t help me and I can’t help them. It’s been one of the most frustrating feelings on earth.

All in all it’s 4 am, almost 5 am and I’m asking for help because I don’t know what else to do. I’m ashamed of myself and I just am so lost.

Because of the rising costs of everything, I’ve often been over drafting now. I don’t know if I’ve just gotten lucky or what but my bank didn’t hit me with overdraft fees that is until today. I got several right at the same time I deposited money and I’m left with under $40.

I’m still getting my halved paycheck so rent is priority with that and then hopefully one or two bills. But I need groceries somewhere in there. There’s a prescription I need to pick up. I have an overdue medical bill that I’ve pushed aside already in lieu of utilities. And I just am so overwhelmed. Thankfully my cat is well stocked in all his food thanks to my best friend ordering him a Goliath sized bag of dry food and me buying wet food earlier than I needed to so there is that positive.

TLDR: If anyone can donate anything so I can get groceries I’d be so grateful. If I could somehow get to $500 to make it so I don’t have to borrow money for my next paycheck I’d be eternally grateful but I feel like that’s asking too much.

I don’t feel like my situation is bad enough for a gofundme but I do have a ko-fi which I’ll link at the bottom. I am 100% going to be job searching for better pay soon but I have a surgery this month and I need to not mess with my insurance just yet.

I’d gladly write drabbles etc if you would like as a thank you gift but I unfortunately don’t have much else to give. I wish I could draw so I could take commissions.

If you can’t afford to donate, I totally get it. But also if you could reblog and maybe it’ll find it’s way to someone who can? Thank you either way.

I’m sorry if I rambled on too much but my mind is racing. I just want to be able to get back on my feet so once I can help myself I can maybe help my family.

[astrolaurical]

Has anyone else in bts has met their fs apart from v?

There were rumors yearssss ago that Jin was in a steady long term relationship with his gf and had been dating her for 5 years. If that was back in idk 2018 and if they are still together then I’m assuming they would be planning for marriage. I’ve noticed that Korean couples tend to date for a lot longer than other Western couples until they get married. A lot of my Korean friends have been in relationships for 5-6 years and still going without being engaged. It has to do with housing though. In korea, you put your entire mortgage cost in your deposit, so if your house was 2.5 million won, you would pay that upon buying. Then all you would have to worry about forever would be utility costs,etc. So most people live at home with their parents until they have saved enough to move out and buy their own place (think of any kdrama you have watched where the lead arrives home after a busy day at work and crawls into her bed at her parents house but then the next night goes on a date with her bf and he has to drop her back off at her parents house. Super awkward, especially when parents catch you making out like in Extradionary Attorney Woo.)

Joon did say that Jin’s house looks like a newlywed’s house 👀. Man is in his early 30’s and is a worldwide superstar. If he got married in secret, I wouldn’t be surprised. I would keep it a secret too. This fandom is so possessive and toxic.

But I don’t think he’s married. It would have gotten leaked. THEIR PASSPORTS HAVE GOTTEN LEAKED. Of course his marriage license would have too. Nah, he’s probably just shacked up with the love of his life. And good for him. He deserves it.

As for the other 6 members…This is all based on astrology and my own opinions. I DO NOT AND WILL NOT PULL TAROT CARDS ON THE MEMBERS. When you try to reach into another person’s energy, others can then reach into yours. Karma- what goes around comes around.

Yoongi- his aura has been so bright lately. I’ve been leaning towards maybe? He went through his Saturn Return and seems to really have found his purpose (making long term goals, etc.)

Namjoon- based off of Indigo, uh no. He’s still getting into karmic relationships. He needs to do some soul searching and self reflect. Like dude, ask yourself: why do you have like 10 songs all about fake love? WHY DO YOU KEEP REPEATING THE SAME PATTERN? It’s bound to repeat until you learn your lesson.

Jhope- idk honestly. He’s so protective of his energy, like a smart person should be. When asked if he would be getting a kiss for New Years, he had that great meme face of disgust. Was he disgusted at being asked such an intrusive question because it violated basic social norms and personal privacy or because he was disgusted at the thought of getting kissed by someone other than his sweetheart? (The answer is the 1st one. Media is too invasive.)

Jimin- ha no. Man’s has been burnt out and depressed for a while but everyone pretends they do not see. 95ers are also entering their Saturn Return year (welcome pal) so he is focusing on trying to survive an existential crisis

Taehyung- see here or here or here

Jungkook- he likes to party and date around (I’m just the messenger. beef with the stars.) He is also superrrrr immature in love (uh perilla leave debate, anyone) so if he does find his fs, they have a lot of work on their hands putting up with not getting annoyed every day not even being able to have basic independence. TLDR: no. He needs to grow up and do some self reflection a La Namjoon. The virgos need to go on a meditation retreat together.

[flamingpen18]

Just About To Give Up

It's been 15 months since we lost our home. During that time, I have put in a multitude of applications to various low-income housing developments and a slew of public housing sites in 6 different states.

I applied for Delaware Public Housing Authority almost 2 years ago. I have not heard a thing since other than three sites that contacted me to make sure I was still interested in housing. Each of those three sites was out of state.

I have contacted the Salvation Army, Welfare, Social Services, Delaware 2-1-1, Hope Center, Hope House, Lutheran Ministries, Catholic Social Services, Neighborhood House, Children & Families First, First State Community Action Center, etc. The list is long.

Welfare put us up in a cheap motel (roaches included) for a month. This fell under the Covid benefits. Unfortunately, those benefits ended which left us where we started, living in the van.

The other places all gave me relatively the same answer. They don't help with finding housing for people or they cannot financially help. The Salvation Army did say that they would help pay back rent but that doesn't do us any good since we would need to have an apartment to rent to get back on the rent. They also said that they may help with security deposits if we found a place.

We reached out to every homeless shelter in the area and were told the same things by each of them. Since I am physically disabled, they cannot allow me to go into their shelters. They do not have the zoning for that and I am an insurance risk. I even told my family to go stay in the shelter and that I would stay in the van. They refused.

During all of this, I have been paying for 2 storage units that contain all of our belongings including furniture, clothing, appliance, and everything from our house. The two units are very expensive and I am on a fixed income due to my disability.

Now, due to the fact that the storage facility changed owners, the rent is higher, and I cannot afford it. We are now behind and are in danger of losing what we have left.

But that's not the worst of it. Our van is breaking down. The power steering is going. Brakes, motor mount, shocks/struts, water pump, etc. The list continues to grow. Dave was a mechanic for years and could do the work as long as someone helps him. It's cheaper than putting the van in the shop. The problem is that we just don't have the money to buy the parts needed.

Our daughter's 16th birthday is in just 16 days, and we have no money to do anything special for her. This is a big milestone for her. She is in driver's ed and will be going for her license soon. I cannot even celebrate her special day and spoil her. This makes me feel like a failure. I sent her to stay with a family so she wouldn't have to deal with being homeless, but she is still affected by it.

We keep getting hit while we are down, and I don't know how much more we can take. I have a Go Fund Me set up to help mitigate costs but it takes so long for the money to go through. I also have Cash App, Venmo, and PayPal which are quicker.

Please donate and share. Our backs are against the wall. The van is barely hanging on and we desperately need it.

[paydayquid]

Despite Bankruptcy Short Term Loans UK Is Your 1 Source of Funding

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Through the intended loan product, anyone can borrow money in the range of £100 to £2,500 without having to provide any security, such as a home, an estate, a car, or jewelry. These by their very nature are unsecured and short-term. As a result, the lender won't ask you to defend the lender. Typically, you have 2-4 weeks to pay back the borrowed money. You can use this short term loans UK without any problem to pay for household expenditures, credit card dues, electricity bills, grocery bills, tuition for your child's school, and many other things.

In spite of bankruptcy, customers can still get same day loans UK, as the subheading states. It indicates that you don't have a major problem getting a loan without a credit check if you have adverse credit factors like defaults, arrears, foreclosure, late payments, CCJs, IVA, skipped payments, low credit ratings, etc.

Before making a loan to you through one of short term loans direct lenders, the lender will require that you meet certain requirements, including that you are at least 18 years old, a resident of the UK, a full-time worker for a reputable company, and that you have an active bank account, which is required in order to receive money via direct deposit. You must now complete the application in order to receive an immediate loan decision.

When may I require a £2,500 Short Term Loans UK?

There are instances when an unexpected bill comes up before payday and you don't have any extra money to pay for it. In this scenario, you might require a £2,500 short term loans UK direct lender to cover:

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You need to make an urgent house repair.

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Emergency travel expenses at the last minute.

It's wise to only use a same day loans UK in an emergency and not to address ongoing financial issues or frequent cash flow issues. We advise getting in touch with a free, unbiased financial advisor like The Money Helper if you need to talk to someone about your finances.

How soon do I have to repay a £500 Same Day Loans UK?

This largely depends on the lender you select. Some companies give you up to 35 days to repay your loan. Consider a same day loans UK to ease the burden on you and your monthly spending plan. This makes the entire lending process more manageable by allowing you to spread the cost of your borrowing, plus interest, over a longer period of time.

[samwiselastname]

Samwise Lastname Life Update (Negative)

I moaned and groaned in that selfie a bit already but like. I have many people who have offered to help me with many things. Truly thankful.

At the same time I've always been The Person with the stable job and full time wage, like, pretty much since I finished DBT halfway through college that's been my defining character trait. Even before then, it was "person who is a prime target for financial exploitation."

My current situation is a shared living space where I am covering about 4/5s of our expenses, by virtue of being able to mask my disability well enough to work full time. We are still coming up $400 short a month. I've just gotten assurance that should change, a housemate is seeking work, but. It hasn't changed yet, and even once it does, I will not feel secure until we have an emergency fund for housing, and I won't feel safe keeping any personal savings until that's settled. Which is a couple years out at this rate - even farther with some necessary home repairs, which will push our deficit even higher.

We only get takeout once a month at most, our expenses have been essential housewares and home improvement items - pest control, plumbing maintenance tools, repair supplies. A few hundred of that deficit is just repeat homeowner shit. We planted a garden this year which was an expense but, not exorbitant. I don't know how to cut down more without like. Eating less? Historically that approach has turned into dangerous weight loss & migraines pretty quick. As it is we're only spending about $100 more a month than the FDA's recommended frugal grocery plan.

I can stop buying alcohol & weed and save... about $10 a month. I could cancel some of my subscriptions and save $20-50. Anything I can cut back on at this point is not financially worth the detriment to my well-being, especially when things like "watching youtube on the TV" and "playing FFXIV" are like. Some of my only safe and passive low-pressure recreational activities.

Don't really know what to do about this other than keep grinding. I'm making myself sick. Tacking on any extra work - hobby creative pursuits that might one day turn into commercial creative pursuits, any amount of job hunting, even a shot at adult content creation - feels unbearable.

I am trying to stop "working overtime" because even the 40 hours fucks with my ability to do anything else. I tried to work around this by job searching and side hustling. Now all my hobbies feel like jobs and every day I'm not working on income feels like self-sabotage. It's stupid - I can get better compensation at my current job picking extra hours. At least when I do that I don't go into a neurotic spiral and stop sleeping. As much. It's at least effective.

So I have this limbo - working over 40 hours physically destroys me, and it's the only way to tip the scales at all right now. I know one can often get a pay raise by finding a new job but - yall the market sucks. I'm trying. I need full time remote WFH and good god is it bad out there. Plus my current insurance rn is killer - I have a 3k out of pocket max. My medical costs would outweigh the raise at any job I've successfully applied for thus far, because my current employer affords me this bizarrely fantastic health insurance with HSA deposits.

Just feel hopeless. If I've gone dark on you that's why. We have four months to get this shit fixed before we're totally fucked and I'm doing everything I can to buy us time.

[artisticbunny]

Ok ok ok Bun I am consuming this lore like you would not believe. Thank you so much for sharing and answering all my crazy asks and not beating me up or anything because I’m weird. (Sorry that’s the first thing that came to mind lol—)

Ok ok, to the point! Terra is def one of the faves of mine Oki? So like can we know more about her? Like how long has she been guarding her ancient object? What happened to her people? Is there something I missed because I wanna know! How long has she been around? How is she connected to the prophecy if she’s guarding an object related to it?

Alright alright lots of questions this time! (Sorry if it’s overwhelming, I just really like sirens because they’re interesting creatures imo lol)

As always stay awesome Bun! You’re amazing! <333 :D

SHAKING YOU SHAKING YOU OF COURSE!!! ID NEVER BEAT YOU UP OVER ANYTHING AAA

Here is some more info on Terra!

First off, I have drawings of all my characters except for two (I actually do but they aren’t as recent so XP) so im gonna also tack on a visual of her for you <3

Here is a detailed explanation on Terra’s background as well ;3

Terra was born into high social status, her grandmother being positioned to protect their city's most prized possession, the sacred magic shard used to power the most important areas of the city Kcorplek. This is the same shard that Terra is found protecting during the events of the story. Terra’s family is a long line of very powerful and very skilled warriors that were often found in a group referred to within their society as “Guardians”. Highly trained warriors that are sworn to protect their people and their city, no matter the cost. At the age of 4, Terra began training to become a Guardian, She was found to be extremely gifted with her powers. At around age 16, She was able to graduate into the academy (the highest ranking school) at the top of her class, having been able to complete the entry test with ease, even when she was much younger than the rest of her class. Such a test being to incapacitate and re-trap a giant sea serpent let loose into the testing arena. Halfway through her final year of the academy, the city was attacked by a group land-dweller raiders. they wore equipment that drowned out the best attempts of the guardians' siren songs. Their defenses meant nothing. Amidst the chaos, Terra's grandmother gave her the sacred shard. Terra swore to not only her grandmother, but to the city that she would keep it safe, no matter the cost, and escaped unspotted to the surface, where she clawed her way out of the lake holding her city, across the mesa reefs (A biome of my own creation: mesa pocked with salt water lakes and ponds filled with brightly colored, beautiful coral reefs), and lake/pond hopped until she felt she was far enough away to be considered safe. It’s been about ten years since then by the time Brook comes into the scene.

Terra has no clue what became of her people, but world building wise, they were ransacked for all of their treasures. They’ve been recovering since then, continuing to sell their main export: salt from the salt deposits left behind from the ancient ocean that once covered the land where they live now and housed their evolutionary ancestors. This ocean has since dried up.

The salt from this region is coveted by magic users for its ability to enhance magical spells, and also by cooks because it is some of the most high-quality salt in the land. It is theorized that the salt contains microscopic remains and spirits of the prehistoric creatures that roamed the ancient ocean, and that is why it can be used in this way for magic users! :) (it’s also an orange color because of the iron deposits also found in this region!)

Left without their magic shard, however, the city was left to find other means to power their homes and businesses.

Terra is currently 28 years old! :) sirens age very similarly to humans, despite the fact that they are convergent species!

(I have put so much thought into the biology of each of the species in this world lol, I’ve even made my own creatures!!!! I created little bug creatures that feed on mushroom insides and use the left over caps as protective shells like hermit crabs! They take on the properties of whatever mushroom they consume and use for shelter as a Defence mechanism!!! They are also immune to said effects of mushrooms x3 I also made creatures that feed off of the fear of their prey and can cause hallucinations with their venom in order to further cultivate their fear! They are able to spray and release the venom into the air as a mist! If you breathe it in it has similar effects, though less potent)

Terra herself is not really related to the prophecy. Her people were given information long long ago that a chosen hero would be sent down in order to collect it, but unfortunately, the prophecy given with the shard is long forgotten.

I’m also gonna throw in some extra facts for you!!! Sirens are able to breathe both above and below water through a combined gill and lung system. Water goes in through their gills, air goes in through the mouth. They are able to switch out the system used on command. Sirens are descendants of carnivorous creatures, causing their sharp serrated teeth, they have since evolved to eat vegetation as well, making them omnivores. Sirens absorb water through their skin, making it so that they have no need for drinking. Sirens can’t actually hypnotize you, they just mess with your emotions and pre-existing desires in order to make you do what they want!

I think there may be more but that’s all that comes to mind right now X)

Sorry this took so long to reply to! I’ve been in class all day qwq

[grazianolagrasta]

How to Find a Professional General Contractor in Miami Beach

Homeownership is exciting. But it comes with a lot of responsibility and an array of unique tasks. If you find a general contractor, you can get help with everything related to home improvement from painting the walls to installing kitchen cabinets. A general contractor supervises the home project and makes sure the job is done efficiently.

With one Google search, you may see a list of contractors popping up – Graziano La Grasta General Contractors in Miami Beach, Florida Contractors, etc. But how do you find out someone suitable for your project?

Let’s go through the best tips about finding a general contractor in Miami Beach!

Don’t Miss Out on Phone Interviews

When you have a list in hand, you should ask relevant questions. Raising these questions will help you find out the best prospect. Start the interview with the size of the project they can handle. Are there projects going on at the same time? Also, ask about their connection with subcontractors. If they have worked with any, for how long would that be?

Finding the answers show whether a company is reliable and available. You will figure out whether the contractor will be able to provide the level of attention a project needs to ensure it runs smoothly.

Read the Contract Before Signing

A general contractor is likely to send a contract that outlines the details of the project. From proof of liability insurance to the payment schedule, the contract needs to mention everything.

Moreover, the contract should highlight the start date and completion date as well as the subcontractors and suppliers. You can put an emphasis on providing a clear contract that holds authentic information.

Ask for the Down Payment

Contractors need a down payment before they add your project to their schedule. You can negotiate the down payment including the payment terms and amount. Many states put a limit on how much the contractor can ask for before beginning the work. When your state does not have a limit, the down payment may be around 25% of the project cost.

The preferred options for a down payment vary; they usually need a wire transfer, cash, or check. Also, ask about the payment schedule. You may use a deposit or final payment agreement. Make sure the final payment agreement does not miss out on anything the contractor promises.

Now that you know what to look for, you should talk to Graziano La Grasta general contractors in Miami Beach. Contact Today!

[cadmium-ores]

Well, we went from summer to fall in about two days. It's chilly in the house now.

Unfortunately, while we were supposed to get some major energy efficiency upgrades BEFORE this point, delays and miscommunications mean I'm waiting for calls to reschedule both our new windows and our insulation. Both should be in before winter, though.

We're also going to just seal off the sunroom and second floor porch as those are the biggest areas of heat loss. I'm going to do the same over the window in each bathroom, and in the attic windows for good measure.

Lastly, I'd discovered plans for a DIY solar heater that like... apparently really works. Like this is just a thing I can do. I'm hoping to build two units for each of my housemates' bedrooms, because that's the side of the house that gets sun. And besides, since I'm on testosterone now, I run way hotter than either housemate.

The basic outline is you take a wooden box, fill it with columns of connected soda cans (so like big tubes), spray paint the inside black, and cover it with glass. At the top of the box you stick an exhaust, and at the bottom you stick an intake, and usually there's a fan in each.

So, I've been harvesting soda cans over the summer and have about a trillion. I scored free storm windows on FB Mkp, which I'm super hyped about, because that seems like it would've been the biggest cost. There was a bunch of random wood and materials left in our basement, so I'm gonna go scrounge down there and hope I can harvest the wood to use. I also found two secondhand computer fans for cheap (also FB Mkp) to drive the air flow. I did have to buy a hole-making bit for my drill. I went ahead and invested in a set because I'm sure this won't be the last time and I wasn't sure exactly what sizes I'd need for this project anyway. Buying even two sizes separately was gonna be basically the same as just getting this set.

Then all I'll have to buy is the "connector" bits (silicone to seal everything, screws or nails to hold my frame together), some kind of tubes for my inlet/outlet, some kind of power source for the fans (I see Amazon sells tiny solar cells that I think would work fine, just gotta look up the fan specs), and the black spraypaint. Counting the bits, then, I'm estimating like a $100 project.

Unfortunately, I don't have any data on heating costs as this'll be our first winter in the home. Even if I did, with the other improvements (like reducing the amt of living space and putting new windows in some of the rooms), I'll never know how much I'm saving monetarily. But again, it's also like for the learning experience -- technical skills like me sucking less at sawing straight lines and the figuring stuff out bits. Practicing frugality has already changed my mindset; my default has switched to "how can I make do?" rather than "where can I buy a product to solve this?" which is really cool.

Might just save our ass, too; I was told last year the main heat source for the house is past its life expectancy and we should replace ASAP, which we can't afford yet. I'm gambling on doing the energy efficiency upgrades first and I'm well aware of that. I do have """an emergency fund..." it is not meant to be an emergency fund, but it'll do in a pinch if our boiler shits the bed in January.

Next steps is measuring the windows and figuring out the size box I'd need & the number of cans I'll use. If I have a crazy amt of excess cans, now's the time to find out, b/c I'll be taking a trip to a state where you can get the deposit back on them next week. I have some other bottles and other size cans to do that with regardless.

[flexible-student-accommodation]

How to Book Affordable & Best Student Accommodation in Birmingham?

Finding the right student accommodation can make or break your university experience. As someone who has been through the ordeal of hunting for affordable yet comfortable student housing in Birmingham, I can share some insights that could help make your search easier.

The Importance of Affordable Student Housing

Let's face it, being a student is expensive enough with tuition fees, books, supplies, and living costs. The last thing you want is to blow a massive chunk of your budget on overpriced accommodation. At the same time, you don't want to compromise on basic amenities and end up in a place that makes studying or living comfortably a nightmare.

My Personal Experience

When I first arrived in Birmingham for university, I made the mistake of not doing enough research. I ended up in a cheap place, but it was also run-down, poorly maintained, and lacked even basic facilities like a decent kitchen or common area. It was a stressful and miserable experience that affected my studies and overall well-being.

Lesson learned. For my next year, I started my search for student accommodation much earlier and was more diligent in researching my options.

The Key Factors to Consider

Based on my experience and research, here are some key factors to consider when looking for affordable and quality student accommodation in Birmingham:

Location: Proximity to your university campus can save you a ton of money and time on commuting. However, places right next to campus tend to be more expensive. Look for areas a short bus or train ride away for better deals.

Amenities: Make a list of must-have amenities like a decent kitchen, common areas, laundry facilities, WiFi, and any other specific needs you may have. Don't compromise on essentials for the sake of saving a few bucks.

Safety and Security: This is non-negotiable. Research the neighborhood crime rates, and security measures in the building, and read reviews from past tenants.

Rental Costs: Look beyond just the rent. Factor in utility costs, deposits, and any other fees. Many landlords advertise low rent but make up for it with high utility charges or hidden fees.

Length of Tenancy: If you only need accommodation for a semester or two, look for short-term options rather than getting locked into a year-long contract.

The Numbers Game

According to student accommodation search engines like Uniplaces and Accommodation for Students, the average monthly rent for a room in a shared student house in Birmingham ranges from £350 to £550, with the city center being the most expensive area.

Private student halls or purpose-built student accommodations (PBSAs) tend to be pricier, averaging £600 to £800 per month for an en-suite room.

However, there are always deals to be found if you look hard enough. For example, I managed to find a decent room in a shared house just a 20-minute bus ride from campus for £400 per month, all bills included.

The Early Bird Gets the Best Deals

My top tip would be to start your search as early as possible, at least 3-4 months before your intended move-in date. The best and most affordable options get snatched up quickly, so being an early bird pays off.

Use multiple search platforms, join housing groups on social media, and don't be afraid to reach out directly to landlords or letting agents in your desired areas.

Lastly, don't forget about Uninist, a company that specializes in providing high-quality, yet affordable short-term student accommodation in Birmingham. They offer flexible tenancy options, fully furnished rooms, and a range of amenities tailored specifically for students. Worth checking out, especially if you're looking for temporary accommodation.

Happy hunting, and may you find the perfect student home that doesn't break the bank!