#it would be nice to share a fandom with kelly again though!

[wellhalesbells]

I would read your Meg 2 fic

So far it's you, me, my bestie, and a frog - ngl, seems like a damn good group 🤙🏻

[shimmershae]

My thoughts on Episode 6--On the Inside

Very appropriate title by the way.  Works in a multitude of ways.  

As always, my randomness is going beneath a cut again to spare the eyeballs of those of you that don’t want to see it at all and also?  Help those of you that have somehow stayed spoiler-free in this brand-new age of early release episodes.  It is still so wild to me that I’m a full episode ahead of half the fandom.  I don’t know what I’m going to do when we get to the final episode and they decide to make us all suffer together--because somehow I do feel they will do exactly that after spoiling us for the first 23 episodes.  It is going to be agonizing.  

Anyway.  Without further ado, Shae’s stream of consciousness review (of sorts).  

Not fair, Angela.  Opening the episode with that shot of that big ass spider.  I hate those suckers.  So naturally, they’re an easy sell for setting the horror scene to me, lol.  

Okay.  Who the hell’s chasing Virgil and Connie?  Walker No-See-Ums?

Barely a minute in and the atmosphere for this episode is moody AF.  

What is this?  Tara Jr. The Walking Dead?  LOL.  Where’s the Scarlett for this mini plantation house?  Anyway.  First three minutes of this episode?  Just as attention grabbing as the first five episode openings this season.  I don’t think people out there are giving our writers enough love for that.  Every episode so far has opened like a mini movie.  

With the way the Walking Dead logo keeps crumbling away with each successive episode, somehow it wouldn’t surprise me at all if the Carol and Daryl spinoff was eventually titled The Living and had flowers growing out of each letter, lol.  I mean, there would be a certain sort of life-affirming symmetry in a show that’s been promised to be much lighter in tone doing just that.  

More Carol and Aaron?  Yes, please.  I don’t necessarily like Carol staying at home and sitting the sidelines like a figurative happy little homemaker in the B story while the rest of the mains are trying like hell to sell the A story, but if she’s going to be totally prohibited from the main storyline until it’s time to blow shit up?  I’m going to continue enjoy getting to see her do what she should have been doing for seasons--interacting with others in the community, especially Aaron and the ladies.  

Truly.  I really am loving my girl getting some quality Aaron and Rosita time.  It’s so long overdue.  

Bless sweet Kelly.  Riding off to her sister’s rescue.  

Why isn’t Lydia shown as part of these plans?  For someone that could barely read last season, I doubt that big ass map was a piece of cake for her and it’s all just guesswork anyway without her guidance.  I mean, why does it feel like they are cutting some of this stuff that might not seem like much plot-wise but would go a long way toward establishing different character beats?  Personally, I would have loved to see her involved in the search and sharing scenes again with Carol and bonding with Kelly. 

Virgil be having that “I always feel like somebody’s watching me” feeling.  Don’t you hate that, lol?  

“You haven’t slept in days.”  But how many days, Virgil?  I’m going to need a number because I’m confused AF about this timeline at this point.  What we’re seeing and what different pieces of dialogue is telling us is not exactly lining up.  I’m going to find it awful hilarious if it hasn’t even been two weeks since the cave in.  For reasons.  

Connie’s spidey senses are clearly tingling.  

Alrighty, then.  She’s clearly got PTSD.  Understandable.  They’ve all had it.  Some have been treated more sympathetically than others, though.  

I mean, it never seems to cross anybody’s mind how Carol probably sees Henry’s head on that pike, Mika’s pale and bloody body, Lizzie crumpled face down in a bed of yellow flowers, Sophia with a smoking bullet hole through her undead head whenever she closes her eyes but whatever.  

Okay though.  But what if Connie had really shitty, impossible to read handwriting?  AKA doctor’s  handwriting.  What then?  

Leah’s face honestly twists my insides whenever I see it, lol.  It’s quiet a visceral thing.  No, that does not make me a horrible person.  Not everybody wants or has to drink the awesome, great, redeemable villainess Kool-Aid.  IMHO, she’s got a face meant for a Walker.  Perfect makeover idea.  Eh.  Mostly it’s her expression and the deadness of her eyes.  

Anyway.  Why is it always the fingers?  Eff that.  

Listen.  If ya’ll can’t tell Daryl’s conflicted AF with the situation he’s landed in, you don’t know how to read NR’s face and eyes.  He’s not a masterclass like MMB but he’s pretty darn good when he wants to be.  

I honestly feel sorry for Redshirt Frost.  

“You do what you gotta do.”  Frost knows what’s what and he’s willing to walk the walk for Maggie.  Impressive loyalty.  I’m left wondering how the current, colder incarnation of Maggie inspired it because I’m still struggling to see it.  Anywho.  My point is the dude knows the score and just gave Daryl the okay.  

Daryl taking off his angel vest before stepping into the role of torturer/interrogator=him shedding the persona/the man Judith and RJ and Lydia and Carol know him to be.  Pushing away his man of honor status so he can just survive somehow.  

Pope never quits chewing whatever the hell he’s got in his mouth.  It’s kind of distracting.  

Ohhh.  We’re back to the Haunted Mansion.  I mean house.  Where are the Hitchhiking Ghosts?  

All the eyes scratched out of those creepy pictures=spooky.  

The good old fogged up bathroom mirror shot.  Somebody’s been watching and studying their horror movies, lol.  Not gonna lie though.  I’m legit bracing myself for the jump scares I know have to be coming.  

I’m loving the music/score in these scenes.  

Truthfully, I could care less about these Reapers.  But they are hella attractive, lol.  Listen.  Angela knows what she’s doing.  

Kelly’s horse is so pretty.  Prayer chain for that baby.  

More dead horses?  Why?  

Connie’s slingshot?  Sorry.  I maintain, no matter how much I like these two, that they have the lamest weapons ever.  Endless supply of Virginia rocks or not.  

So.  Did Virgil and Connie enjoy a little equine for dinner?  Did they kill it before the Walkers fed?  What monsters!  Yeah, no.  Not if they were starving even if I personally could not have.  The more probable story is they fled the camp in a panic and left the horse behind and then it went down.  Sorry.  I didn’t exactly study the wounds on the poor animal because it is so traumatizing to me to continue to see them meet such dastardly ends on this show.  I don’t know who the hell has such a score to settle with horses but stop it.  

Days.  It’s only been days.  Not weeks.  So many times with all that Daryl and Company have had to contend with since the cave in?  Those do not exist, lol.  They’re just a convenient, appeasing piece of dialogue thrown at a fanbase primed and ready to read everything into not much of anything.  There’s just not been enough time for it to happen unless Daryl has literally been up 24/7 for all of them.  You know, strategizing how to attack the remainders of Alpha’s horde, figuring out how to defend Hilltop before it fell, healing from the wound he sustained at Alpha’s hand, sitting on that log all damn night with Negan waiting on Carol to come home, having a lover’s quarrel with his best damn everything, taking care of the Grimes babies and Lydia, being the reluctant leader.  Kang, why you playing them like that?  Daryl’s a super guy but he’s not a superhuman with clones.  So many times my ass.  

Seriously.  Who been watching Connie and Virgil?  The MIA Oceansiders?  Beta’s Fee Fi Fo Fum Ghost?  

Nice.  A Michonne mention.  Maybe the truth will start to trickle out.  

LMAO at Connie’s “I’m not staying here.”  Me neither, girl.  I would be outta that house so fast.  

They really “Quiet Placing” this episode.  Honestly?  I’m kinda loving it.  

WTF was that?  I know she can’t hear but you telling me all the little hairs on her arms, legs, and neck didn’t stand the fuck up and say fuck this shit, I’m gone?  Pardon my language, lovelies, but that moment had my heart kicking up several beats.  

Okay, okay.  To be fair to Connie, every hair on her body been doing that since the front door closed.  Maybe they’re desensitized.  

Gollum’s chasing Connie!!!  He/She wants their Precious!!!

The knee jerk reactions about this episode sight unseen are OTT, honestly.  And I mean no disrespect by saying that.  I can understand completely where they’re coming from because we’ve been burned so long in this fandom.  But it’s obvious the spoiler source has their particular biases and reads into things in such a way that don’t line up with what’s actually being shown onscreen.  Daryl’s loyalty in this episode and all along quite clearly lies with his family and his community.  He’s been playing Leah since the start and is truly just trying to survive somehow.  

Awful thought.  The Reaper that’s so suspish of Daryl--haven’t quite caught his name or really cared to.  I feel like he might try to get to Daryl somehow.  When he realizes that Daryl cares no more for Leah than any human would care for somebody (they thought) they used to know?  He’s going after Dog.  Or Carol should she finally join this story. 

I refuse to believe Carol isn’t going to be a part of this story.  Because they messing with her mans, lol.  

“You’re ever with us or you’re not.”  Now where have I heard those words before?  I wish I could find that Daryl gif because that had to be one of the funniest things ever, lol.  

Unrealistic suggestion to Daryl, Leah?  Breathing oxygen seems to piss off Carver.  Oh look.  He finally has a name for me, lol.  

I love how all three of the ladies--Carol, Magna, and Rosita--look at Kelly with such indulgent, adoring “little sis, you alright?” eyes.  

They are seriously the most beautiful quartet of characters.  I mean all of them are lovely but Carol and Rosita this season?  Ugh.  The unfairness of the pretty.  

Human bones.  Terminus callback, lovelies.  How it all would have eventually gone down if Gareth and Co. hadn’t met the business end of Rick’s red machete.  

So many horror movie homages in this one.  

Virgil’s like “let’s leave this Texas Chainsaw Massacre behind.”  

Connie and Virgil have obviously bonded, ya’ll.  I’m surprised by how much I’m enjoying their scenes together when the character mostly got on my nerves with Michonne.  He’s a good actor and the core of his character is sympathetic, but I’m not going to lie.  I wasn’t super enthused when he was the one that rescued Connie because I didn’t know how their scenes would play out. But there’s a nice synergy there.  

Okay.  Does Carver want Leah for himself?  Because I’m sure Daryl at this point would love to scream “take her, I know where I fucking belong!”  

Daryl’s digging in deep because Carver has shown him Leah’s potential weak spot.  Nuance is truly lost on some people, LMAO.  He cares about Leah as a human being probably.  He’s Daryl, after all.  The sweet one.  But he sees her as his way outta this and he’s going to exploit it.  

It’s nice to have a silent Negan for once, lol.  I can pretend he didn’t take my baby Glenn away from me and enjoy JDM’s pretty.  

So.  These cannibal people were the watchers?  Hmm.  

I’m really digging Virgil 2.0.  Yeah.  Nobody’s surprised more than me.  

Sweet, sweet scene between Virgil and Connie.  His determination to reunite her with her family brings back the sympathy I felt for him when he told Michonne “I promised her flowers.  Every day.”  

Damn.  How many of those creepy crawly cannibals are there?  

How brave of Connie to confront her fears to save someone she’s obviously grown to care about.  

The Kelly/Connie reunion gave me chills and made me cry.  Thank fuck Angela didn’t cheapen that moment by having it focus on literally anybody else.  Kelly is the most important person in the whole world to Connie and vice versa.  Just like Carol is the most important person in the whole world to Daryl and vice versa.  Angela fucking knows.  Everybody does.  Except the people busy building castles out of sand while the waves of Carol’s and Daryl’s converging stories keep crashing closer and closer to shore.  

Such a beautiful moment given to us by Angel Theory and Lauren Ridloff.  So authentic and sweet.  Kelly and Connie are home to each other.  

Poor Frost.  That’s all I gotta say about that.  

WTF, though.  Was Mel just not available or what?  I want to see more of the ASZ characters that I care about, not the Reapers.  Like I’d be fine with the story if all the characters not named Maggie, Negan, or Daryl weren’t surviving on crumbs during it.  Especially the 2nd billed actress on the entire show.  Angela.  Please.  Fix this.  

One last WTF.  Seriously.  WTF has Maggie done to inspire Pope’s obsession?  It better be juicy after all this shit.  

Overall impression of the episode--

One of my favorites of the season so far.  The horror aspects were fantastic, IMHO. I truly didn’t expect to like Connie and Virgil’s scenes as much together so that was a nice surprise.  She got the reunion that felt most true and earned for the character and her story and I thank Angela from the bottom of my heart for that.  

I would have loved more Carol but I always want more Carol.  I’m okay with her taking a backseat because ultimately?  This was Kelly’s moment with her sister.  Carol and Connie will eventually have their time to sit down and talk.  And pick back up their blossoming friendship because I truly do not feel Connie blames Carol at all.  

I do wish Lydia had been included with the girl group.  Last episode felt like it was leading up to that.  

The Reaper storyline continues to be the weakest link because every time we see them the dialogue and interactions feel totally recycled from the time previous.  I feel like it would have totally been helped by a tighter focus and less stretching out because 8 episodes of this is really diluting what I feel like Angela and Co. are going for.  I’m not here for Leah being redeemed or being a bigger focus in any of the episodes because she does nothing of interest for me.  I’m just peeking in on that story for the Daryl of it all.  

Speaking of the Daryl? You lovelies out there gotta stop taking that spoiler source’s recaps at face value because it’s obvious to me at least that there’ some bias at work.  Every action and word coming from Daryl is coming from a place of loyalty to his family and wanting to protect them, no matter how he has to dirty his hands.  Leah is just a means to his ultimate end.  She’s not his future.  She never was.  His future’s already spoken for and 2023 can’t get  here soon enough.  But like Daryl, we have to just survive somehow.  

Oh goodie.  More Maggie and Negan next episode and looks like no real follow up on Connie and the ASZ reunions.  Hopefully, this is yet another instance of the previews being deceiving but I’m not holding my breath.  

Until later, lovelies.  

Hope my word vomit didn’t bore you too much.  

[super-unpredictable98]

Just Lydia

Fandom: Misfits Pairing: Nathan x Lydia (OC - Hard Candy’ verse) Word Count: 1,9 k Warning: Strong language, mild sexual content, spoilers for Doki Doki Literature Club, mention of death (suicide, stabbing, hanging). a/n: Takes place a few days before the infamous milk fiasco.

(Masterlist)

"It's tonight! Everyone, my flat, at seven!" Lydia announced as everyone was changing in the locker room.

"What are we doing again?" Alisha asked.

"It's a Doki Doki party. I brought this game with me from the future, I think you guys are gonna love it. You should ask Nikki to come, Curtis."

"I'll see what I can do," he laughed.

"I think I finally see the resemblance between you and Barry..." Nathan taunted. "You're both big nerds!"

"I might be a nerd, but it won't be me shitting my pants tonight, this is a horror game," I cocked one eyebrow at him.

"Oh, horror game? That makes it more interesting. But y'should know by now, I'm too manly t'be scared of a little game."

"Aw, Natty... You have no idea what's coming for you."

That night I prepared everything. I hooked the computer to the tv, I made sure we had a clean slate with no file interferences, I bought beers and snacks for everyone, and make the living room cozy for our little party.

Nathan was the first one to arrive, followed by Simon, we all sat down on the mountain of pillows and sheets I made on the floor, there was a blanket for everyone, but Nate decided he wanted to share mine.

"It looks like a visual novel," Simon commented, musing at the screen where the four protagonists stood in their cute uniforms in front of a white and pink background.

"It kinda is, but it's different, you'll see," I opened my beer and took a sip before Nathan immediately stole it from me.

"Lollipop... If you think this is gonna scare me, I've got bad news for ya."

"Wanna bet?"

"Y'know what? Yes," he nodded confidently. "The winner is the only one gettin' head tonight."

"That's disgusting..." Simon winced.

"Deal," I shook Nathan's hand.

Once everyone arrived and was comfortably seated in front of the TV, I started the game. I giggled, knowing they were in for a treat. Oh, how I wish you could play it for the first time again!

"This game is not suitable for children or those who are easily disturbed?" Nikki grimaced. "But it's just a bunch of anime girls."

"Weird, innit?" I tilted my head. "Seriously though, if anyone here is mentally unstable, it's better to do something else."

Everyone agreed to move forward, curious to see what those four innocent girls could possibly do that was so scary... The first part of the game was pretty much just reading and reacting sometimes, pretty chill.

"Okay, we need to decide right now, which girl are we trying to impress?" I asked.

"Sayonara!" Nathan shouted.

"You mean Sayori?" Simon gave him a judgy look.

"You know what I meant, Barry... She's the cutest one, she's so nice."

"I agree," Alisha nodded with an eye roll. "Sayori is the sweetest one."

"Me too," Simon raised his hand.

"I like the one with the purple hair," Curtis shrugged.

"Y'like her or her massive knockers?" Nathan mocked.

"You prick... She's smart, unlike you."

"I think we should go for Natsuki," Nikki suggested.

"Yeah, she's feisty," Kelly laughed. "It's gonna be more fun to get 'er."

Since Sayori had three votes, we ended up going for her. We crafted our poems to fit her taste and each time we had to read the girls' creations I carefully pointed out that they should pay attention to it, but without giving away too much. I even showed them the files, but none of them seemed to care a lot.

Nathan, of course, was making a point to show me he wasn't scared in the least. He kept making fun of every single poem and mocking the way the girls talked to MC, going as far as to do that stupid finger thing Sayori does. When everyone was discussing which path to follow, he would look at me and pretend to suck his beer bottle, as if saying 'that's what you'll be doing later'.

"Ooooh how scary," he teased. "We have t'choose one o'these hot chicks to bang over the weekend... Do they at least show us the shaggin'? Do I get t'see them naked?"

"So are we going with Yuri or Natsuki?" I ignored his comment.

"What about Sayori? She must be sad, we should check on her," Alisha said.

"We don't have that option right now, we need to pick one of the girls."

Nikki, Kelly, Alisha, and Nathan chose Natsuki. Simon and Curtis wanted Yuri. Once again democracy prevailed and we joined Natsuki to help her bake cupcakes. Everyone was way too invested in the game at this point, they were hooked, which was unexpected to say the least.

When Sayori eventually confessed her feelings to us the room went wild. Everyone was talking over the other, shouting what I should do and I laughed watching how invested they all were.

"Say yes! Let's shift this bird! C'mon!" Nathan groaned.

As a general consense, we decided to accept her confession, leading to that cute scene when we hug and set up a date during the festival. Everyone was happy and Nate didn't even remember the bet or the warnings anymore.

The festival rolled around and with it came the weird conversation with Monika, my favorite character by the way:

"She's right," Curtis pointed way too passionately at the TV. "We should've stopped by her house!

"Wait a second, how does she know we had that conversation with Sayori?"  Simon wondered.

"It's a game, doesn't need t'make sense," Nathan rolled his eyes. "Let's go back and wake her up. Maybe now we can finally shag her! For the love of God!"

"Is the poem supposed to be like this?" Kelly asked. "Or is it a glitch?"

"No, it's like this," I covered a smile.

"Get out of my head," Nikki mused at the words.

Everyone was intrigued as we ran to pick up our new girlfriend. Then came the infamous 'I opened the door' scene, the screen was completely dark when...

"JESUS CHRIST! NO!" Nathan hid his face against my shoulder when Sayori's dead body was revealed.

"Oh my God, Lydia..." Alisha cried. "Why did you invite us here? For this?"

"We said we love her, how did that happen?" Simon stared wide-eyed at the screen. "Could we have done anything different?"

"No," Curtis shook his head. "I went back and tried all the different ways, she always kills herself."

"You turned back?" I snorted.

"Don't judge me! You're the one who wanted us to play in the first place!"

"This is the most fucked up thing I've ever seen," Nathan couldn't even look. "And I've seen people die in front of me... I've died! And this shit is still messed up!"

"Thought you were too manly to get scared with a silly game," I narrowed my eyes.

"Go to the files," Simon suggested. "Maybe there's something in there that can help."

I did so, knowing full well what was gonna happen... And loving every second of it.

"Her file is gone? What the fuck?" Nikki leaned closer to the screen.

"Put her back, Lollipop, y'have a copy, don'tcha? Put her back!" Nathan  demanded.

I tried, but as we all know, that doesn't work and it just makes us stare at her dead body for a bit longer.

After Sayori's death the game sort of rushes through the second, third, and fourth act. We were all a bit thrown off by the fact that she had been completely eliminated from the game, but we kept playing regardless.

When Natsuki and Yuri were going mental and the jumpscares started, that's when Nathan accepted that he was, indeed, scared and I would be the one getting head tonight. The glitches, the creepy imagery, the unexpected changes, the mouse moving by itself... He was yelping and flinching nonstop, which I thought was hilarious.

"It's this bitch!" Alisha shouted angrily as Monika's face took the screen. "She's doing this!"

"You're right!" Simon realized. "She wants us all to herself so she's making the other ones go mental, but how is she doing it?"

"She's the club's president, duh," Kelly scoffed as if it was obvious.

"Which gives her the knowledge that she's in a game!" he snapped his fingers. "She's sentient!"

"You're a genius, Barry!" Nathan gasped. "This bitter cunt is deletin' the others! I get it now, we gotta defeat her before she gets rid of someone else, let's do this!"

It was about 11 p.m. when Yuri's confession happened, but nobody gave a shit about noise complaints. Once again the room was filled with voices, discussing if we should say yes or no, how that would change the outcome, how our decision would affect Monika and the way she's feeling.

"We need to say yes, she's crazy," Nikki argued.

"Yeah, if we say no, she might kill us," Simon warned.

"But if we say yes Monika might kill us instead," Curtis countered. "She might get pissed off."

"Who's scared of that bitch? Say yes!" Nathan shook me by the shoulders.

"I never thought I'd say this, but I'm with Nathan," Alisha rubbed her eyes nervously.

"I don't think we should, she's creepy, did you see her eyes?" Kelly shivered.

Little did they know, the answer didn't matter, the outcome was always the same... The room went dead silent for a second as Yuri stabbed herself with a knife.

"Fuck!" Nathan whined. "Not again!"

"Jesus, this game is so sick," Curtis couldn't take his eyes from the screen.

"Do we just stare at her while she's talking this nonsense?" Alisha covered her eyes as the weekend passed.

Finally, the big climax arrived. Monika deleted the two other girls under fervorous protests from my friends, and there we were: Trapped in that classroom with that psychopath (she's not a villain, I could argue about that for hours, but that's not the point), listening to her talking and talking and talking for ages.

"I'm talking to you, MC... Or do you go by Lydia Bellamy or something?" Monika said and I swear Nathan did a cross sign.

"How does she know...?" Alisha freaked out.

"Were you checking on my character file for me?" she asked as I paused to grab more beer. That's when Simon solved the puzzle:

"Delete her!" he leaned over me to look at the computer screen. "Delete her file."

"Can we do that?" Nathan looked at me hopeful.

"We absolutely can," I smirked.

You all know the gist... Monika gets deleted, regrets all of her actions and apologizes, says she still loves us despite everything. The game restarts and this time Sayori goes mental, leading Monika to save us all by breaking the game beyond repair and deleting everything permanently.

"This is so good," Simon was amazed. "It's a psychological horror masterpiece."

"I know right? You were the one who made me play it in the future," I smiled proudly. "You told me about all the easter eggs and nuances to unpack."

"Wow, now I feel kinda bad," Nathan stared blankly at the wall. "Monika saved us..."

"Well, looks like I was right after all," I sighed. "You're literally sweating through your shirt."

"I thought the shit we've been goin' through damaged me, but this... This ain't right. This was twisted."

"So, should I wait for you naked or would you like to undress me?" I purred next to his ear.

"You can't tell me you're horny after playin' this!"

"After you've done it as many times as I did, you get used to it... Now come on, I'm the only one coming tonight. Just Lydia."

Tag List: @elliethesuperfruitlover @firstpersonnarrator @spanishmossmagnolia​@a-ghoulish-tale @seanfalco

[sylvies-chen]

Let me just say... I’ve binge read Hopelessly Devoted to You and it is just amazing. I never knew I needed a Soulmate fic until this one. I love Brettsey and found myself not minding one bit the slow burn. Maybe it’s the way you wrote it. Every line was captivating and I surprisingly found myself patient with it. I didn’t know I was capable of that lol. I love Stellaride too and I’m so happy you give us bits and insight into their relationship as well. I find it feeding my Stellaride heart. Also the bit about Stella being bi. Nice call. I love that. I can def. see that. I love how protective Severide is of his friends and especially of his girl. Also the mention of Stella’s ex that had Kelly mad in the bathroom lol; a part of me wants him to make another appearance just so he can see Kelly got the girl and they’re engaged. I love the friend group and the group chat going on. I love Casey and Severide’s bromance in the show and in your story. I love Gallo defending his bestie Ritter and how protective the friend group got of them. I wonder will douchebag show his face again. I just imagined a big brawl busting out at Molly’s bar while Stella’s on shift for some reason over them defending their friend. I love how nervous Severide was leading up to the proposal even though they’re soulmates and we were sure she was gonna say yes. I love how Joe didn’t find his soulmate right away and was on a journey to find her with Otis and how Chloe came into the picture and just fit right in which was awesome. I love how much Brettsey misses each other and practically craves each other when they’re separated. Them falling asleep together on the phone was so sweet. I’m so glad Brett turned that guy down (im blanking on his name right now) whew we dodged a bullet, I thought i was going to be willingly forced (lol) to tolerate their relationship like I had to do in the show. I’m just wondering/thinking out loud and no I’m not expecting an answer because that would involve spoilers but I anticipate where the story goes next. I wonder will Dawson ever find out that her ex boyfriend and former friend are soulmates? Is Dawson going to attend Stellaride’s wedding? Will the douchebags we met or were mentioned throughout the story (Sylvie’s exes, the guy jealous of Sylvia coming in first, the guy making bs remarks to Ritter) make another appearance? Sorry for this long review, my excitement to tell you how amazing this story is and my favorite moments got the best of me. I look forward to whatever you have in store for us. Thanks again for sharing your talent with the world! Have a great and safe day!

Ok this has been in my inbox for a few days now and I haven’t responded to it until now because I’m just BLOWN AWAY by this ask. Like. I genuinely have no words. This is truly one of the sweetest, kindest asks I’ve gotten so far!! I’m feeling the love right now oh gosh 🥺

Yes, I did make Grainger (I love that you just completely forgot his name by the way, absolutely hilarious!) a shorter, less important roadblock in this AU. I really didn’t want to put you guys through the same torture canon has put us through lol.

As for teasing what’s to come and answering your questions, I can tell you that we’ll see some more of some minor characters, not-so-nice ones included. There will also be some minor characters coming in for a chapter coming up fairly soon and it’s just a really hilarious chapter to be honest! Gabby might not attend the wedding but she’ll definitely be brought up again and there will be some closure with her that Sylvie and Matt both get.

Anyway, I am so glad you’re enjoying the story! Thank you so much for all of these kind words, I truly do not know what I did to deserve such kind and loyal readers. This fandom is amazing 💛

[like-a-bag-of-potatoes]

Playing With Fire - At the Bottom of a Bottle

A/N: So this is my first crack at Chicago fire fanfiction, so don't judge too hard, alright? This will unfold from the beginning of season three, so if you haven't watched it yet, but plan to; SPOILER ALERT! I tried to follow along with the storyline of the show, but some things have been changed. Shout out to my superawesome beta @thorne93, you rock! 

Fandom: Chicago Fire

Pairing: Kelly Severide x Beth (OFC) 

Warnings: Language probably. 

Wordcount: 1623

Over the next couple of weeks, Beth and Kelly continued their little… arrangement. It had become a sort of routine for them at this point. Kelly would be out with friends or whatever while Beth worked the bar at Molly’s, then when the night came to an end, he would make his way to her place and they would spend the night together. It worked in a way. At least that's what Beth kept telling herself. 

One night she sat up and waited for him, but he never showed, and it was at that point that she realized that she couldn't keep doing this any longer. Thoughts of him with other women crept into her mind and made her physically ill. She had let this go too far, and now she was in too deep with this man and she needed to get out. 

The next morning she made her way down to the firestation to talk to him. She knew it was a shitty move to do this while he was at work, but she didn't trust that she could get through it at home. Besides, she kind of needed him sober for this, and that seemed to happen only when he was at work, so here she was. 

Kelly was in his office, going over some details on a report when he heard a knock on his door. He looked up to see Beth standing there, a careful smile on her face. 

“You have a sec?” she asked. 

“Sure,” he said, closing the file he was working on and turning the chair around. He was a little confused as to why she was here. At some point she had made it clear to him that she wanted to keep things between them on the down low, not wanting anyone to know, but here she was. 

She took a seat on the bed, nervously rubbing her palms on her thighs. “Look… I think we should stop- you know - things.” 

“Ookay…” he dragged, leaning back in his chair. “Did something happen?” he wondered. 

“Not really. It's just that we agreed to keep things fun and casual, and it just isn't anymore,” she said.

“Wow. Tell me how you really feel,” he retorted. 

“I'm sorry, Kelly. But this isn't casual for me anymore, and when it stopped being casual, it stopped being fun. I don't want to be a last resort at the end of your bottle.” 

“Unbelievable,” he muttered, running his hand over his face. “You’re the one that wanted casual, Beth,” he reminded her. 

“I know, but now I don't want that anymore. I want some space,” she insisted. 

“You know I don't think of you like a last resort right? I was just trying to play by your rules.” 

“Yeah, maybe. But as long as you’re trying to drink and screw your pain away -” she stopped herself. “Look… I didn't come here to fight, I just wanted to let you know that I need some space.” 

“You got it,” he said, turning his chair back around. “Close the door on your way out.” He pretended to focus on his paperwork while he waited for her to leave. This was bullshit. He had done exactly as she asked and somehow it still backfired on him. His anger got the best of him and he sent everything on his desk crashing to the floor in one fast motion. 

Just as the crew in house 51 didn't think the lieutenant's mood could get any worse, it did. Dawson had seen Beth leave the house earlier and it didn't take a genius to figure out why Severide’s mood had soured.   

***

The next night Beth was at work with Gabby and Herrmann, trying to keep the blue eyed lieutenant as far from her mind as possible, which didn't exactly go as well as she had planned. Every time someone came through the door and the little bell chimed above it, her head snapped around to see who it was, her stomach filling with butterflies for a second before she realized it wasn't him. 

Nothing got past her friend, Gabby, and she insisted that her and Beth talk it out after they had closed up for the night. So five minutes past two, the two of them sat down with a beer each. 

“I know that Kelly is a lot to handle right now, but if you just ride it out with him I think - no, I know - that the two of you will be really good together,” Gabby said. “He's a good man.” 

“I know he's a good man, and if it's meant to be, we will figure it out down the road,” Beth assured. “I just - I can't help him through this. He needs to find his own way.” 

“Why do I get the feeling there's something more going on here?” Gabby asked. The woman was too perceptive for her own good. 

Beth took a long pull off her beer as she thought about what to tell her friend. Gabby had been such a good friend to Beth since she moved here, so she decided to just lay it all out for her. At least then, Gabby might not hold this break up thing against her. “... and that's why I can't get involved with him right now. It's just all too familiar to me,” she concluded. 

Gabby slowly nodded her head in understanding. “Shit. Beth, if I had known…” 

“You didn't know,” Beth interrupted. “It's not exactly something that I go around advertising, but I wanted you to know so that you don't think I'm a complete asshole for bailing.” She had to admit that it felt nice to have shared this with someone. 

“For the record, I didn't think you were an asshole,” Gabby said with a chuckle. “I get it though, I really do.” 

“Thanks, hun. You’re a good friend,” Beth said with appreciation in her voice. “I don't know about you, but I’m ready to call it a night.” 

“I'm with you on that one.” 

The two of them locked up, said goodnight, and then headed in opposite directions. Beth's bed was definitely calling out for hur, but as luck would have it, that wasn't the only thing calling. Getting a phone call at 2.45 in the morning never meant anything good, so Beth answered with a very hesitant hello. 

“Hey. My name is Collin, I work at The Tavern downtown. Do you know a Kelly Severide?” the unknown caller asked. 

“Uhm… yeah?” Beth answered, her heart beating a million miles an hour as a familiar feeling settled in her stomach. 

“I'm sorry to call at this hour, but Kelly has had a few too many and this was the last number dialed,” he explained. “Look. He's a good customer and he's not causing any problems per se, he just won't go home. I'd hate to have to call the cops on him.” 

A long pause followed before Beth answered. “I'll be right there.” 

She fought against her tears all the way downtown, trying not to think about how many times she had made a similar trip like this back in New York. Chicago was supposed to be a new beginning for her, but somehow she was right back to where she was back home.

Kelly’s face lit up like a candle when he saw her walking through the doors. “Beth!” he exclaimed excitedly, stumbling as he tried to get off his chair. “What are you doing here?” He made his way over to her with a few sidesteps and wrapped her up in a big hug. 

He reeked of the booze he had had and Beth fought hard against her instinct to recoil. “Let's get you home, alright?” she said softly. 

Collin the bartender gave her Kelly’s car keyes. “Figured it was best to just confiscate them,” he explained. 

“Thanks. And thanks for the call.” She tried to keep Kelly on his feet, which wasn't easy, but somehow she had gotten him to her car and from there into her apartment. It was better to bring him home to herself than to start waking up his roommates in the middle of the night. 

She had barely even closed the door behind them when Kelly stumbled his way to the bathroom and emptied his stomach into the toilet. An overwhelming feeling of familiarity and hopelessness nearly overpowered her, but right now it was more important to get Kelly to bed. Beth could dwell on her poor life decisions later. 

“You’re the best, you know that?” Kelly said as Beth joined him in the bathroom, his voice echoing in the toilet bowl. 

She didn't answer him. Instead she pulled a washcloth from her cupboard and soaked it in cold water, placing it on his neck just as he threw up again. She knelt down next to him and ran her hand up and down his back soothingly. “You have more coming?” she asked softly. 

“Nah. I think I'm done,” he said as he sat back on his heels and flushed his evening down the toilet. “I'm sorry about this.” 

“We can talk about that tomorrow,” she assured, getting to her feet and helping him do the same. “Let's get you to bed, alright?” 

A bucket was placed on the floor next to the bed where Kelly had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, just in case he wasn't done throwing up. Then Beth grabbed some linens from her closet and made up the couch for herself to sleep on. There wasn't much sleep that night for her though, she knew there was a conversation to be had in the morning and she wasn't particularly looking forward to it.  

Tags: @campingmonkey​ @deansgirl215​ @thevelvetseries​

[klaineharmony]

Fic boosting/comments thread

Hi everyone - 

I’m feeling a little lonesome tonight because Spouse is away on a work trip, and I am not feeling 100% (Spouse is also super sick with a sinus infection, sadly), so I was trying to think of something nice to do that would let myself and my fic writing followers boost their work and get some feedback.

Let’s do this: What are your top three fics that you wish people would comment on? Reblog and include fandom, description, and why comments would help you as a writer. Provide links, then tag your favorite writers so they can play, too. :) No limits on how many people you tag! This is all about helping people share their work and gain motivation. And this way we all have more to read! I will reblog all of you who provide links to your stories. :)

Right now, these are the three fics I would love to get comments on:

A Warbler’s Reunion -  Glee fandom. When Wes and David plan a Warblers' ten-year reunion and ask Kurt and Blaine to sing, the two Broadway stars know their friends are scheming. They decide to do some scheming and plan some surprises of their own.

This is my oldest WIP, y’all. I started it just after the second season of Glee finished, and I only have half a chapter left to write! It has Klaine, and Niff, and Sebastian with one of my OCs (Colin), and David and Mercedes! I love this story, but it has just been a struggle to finish it. So many early Dalton tropes. :)

Sweet Summer Music - Newsies fandom. Sarah Jacobs left her hometown of New York to pursue the career of her dreams: becoming a professional cellist. After graduating from the New England Conservatory, she became the second chair cellist for the Boston Symphony Orchestra.In Sarah’s third year with the BSO, the symphony once again goes to its summer home at Tanglewood in Lenox, MA, where Sarah’s brother David and his husband Jack run the hottest new art gallery in the Berkshires. When a beautiful arts and music critic from The New York Times shows up for the BSO’s opening concert, Sarah finds herself hoping for things she thought she’d given up on years before. Can she and Katherine find happiness together?

This is another story that I adore, for the only f/f pairing I have ever fallen in love with. I have two or three chapters left, I think, and this story has everyone grown up, in their thirties, and dealing with some pretty adult struggles - but with lots of love. I have ideas for the last few chapters, but they haven’t coalesced into a really solid plan.

We’ll Be There to Defend One Another - Newsies fandom. Sarah Jacobs is in love with Jack Kelly. She knows (though she shouldn't) that her brother David is also in love with Jack. Katherine and David love each other, too, in their own way. With Katherine's help, Sarah is going to make sure everyone gets to be happy.In other news, Jack and David uncover a conspiracy against the railroad unions, Katherine finds a new story in a familiar location, and Sarah finds herself drawn into the work of the International Ladies Garment Workers Union.(Or, the fic in which the author has historical notes at the end, and tries her best to explain the complexities of marriages and same-sex relationships in the 1900s - while also letting her characters push the boundaries of said relationships.)

Oh, my. What do I say about this fic, except that I pour my heart into it, every time I manage to write a chapter? (And it is long. And it is polyamorous. And the chapters are filled with historical notes. And these characters make me cry with how much they love one another. And this fic is everything I ever wanted from a sequel for this movie/musical that has wound its way around my heart.) 

Tagging many people! Share with all of us! :) @vividstitch, @whatstheproblembaby, @queenofbrooklyn, @honeysucklepink, @chriscalledmesweetie, @caramelcoffeeaddict, @lilyvandersteen, @jackabelle73, @hkvoyage, @lady-divine-writes, @rthstewart, @syrena-of-the-lake, @edenfalling, @elozable, @radioactivepigeons, @penzyroamin, @livingchancy, @captainlordauditor, @rudeflower, @cinnamon-t, @safarikalamari, @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine, @blurglesmurfklaine, @wordshakerofgallifrey, @slayediest, @elwinglyre, @grlnxtdr30

Anyone I missed, it was not intentional, and you are welcome to join in! :)

[companionjones]

Long/Short Distance Relationship (2/4)

Pairing: Modern!Homeless!Jack Kelly x Reader

Fandom: Newsies

Summary: You come back to New York. Jack is more than happy to see you.

Warnings: Angst

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Extra

*******

    “Are they really here?!” Jack shouted as he burst into the building he shared with his friends.

    One of said friends, Racetrack, nodded. “Yeah. They made it back.”

    Jack exclaimed as he frantically glanced around, “Well, where are they?!”

    Kelly was booking it up the stairs as soon as he heard you were on the roof.

    When he first caught sight of you, your back was to him, and you were gazing at the horizon. “Still as beautiful as I remember,” you commented.

    Jack smiled, “Nah, I think you’ve gotten prettier.”

    Turning around, you caught eyes with the boy for the first time in a year. The two rushed to each other, and finally, you were in each other’s arms.

    “I was so scared you wouldn’t be here,” you rambled, “I had thoughts that maybe you and the boys went somewhere else, or maybe you were...with someone else--”

    Jack kissed you. He pulled you as close as he could, and his arms went around your lower back and up to the back of your head. You hadn’t felt that safe since the last time you had seen him.

    He separated from you and rested his forehead on yours. “There’s been no one else,” Jack confessed in a whisper.

    “Same for me,” you chuckled. “God, we are insane! We’re insane. This is insane.”

    Jack seduced you into another kiss. When you separated again, he said, “I missed you,” like it was the only truth in the world.

    An hour later, you and Jack were still on the rooftop. He was laying against a wall, and you were in his arms. The two of you were gazing off into the skyline.

    “Oh!” you suddenly exclaimed, sitting up. “I almost forgot. How do you distract me so easily, Kelly?”

    He chuckled.

    You walked out of Jack’s sight, and when he saw you again, you were carrying two heavy duffel bags. You dropped them in front of him. “I told my classmates that they were filled with snacks for the ride back. I’ll just tell them I lost them,” you explained, opening them.

    Inside, there were blankets, pillows, winter clothes, shoes, non-perishable foods, water bottles, and medical supplies.

    “For you and the guys,” you informed, “Some stuff I’ve collected in the past year.”

    Next thing you knew, Jack was tackling you to the floor and kissing you wherever he could reach. “I love you!” he cried. Jack was really crying. He hid his face in your neck to comfort himself.

    “Baby...” You lifted his head from your neck to dry his tears, “Why’re you crying?”

    He moved both of you back to sit up. “You...You’re perfect. This stuff should be able to last us a month, at least. I love you.” The second time Jack said it, his voice was more level, but his words held as much meaning as before.

    “I love you too, Jack,” you returned after taking his hand in yours.

    Elated by your expression, Jack chuckled and kissed you again.

    When the two of you parted, and your forehead was resting on his again, Jack inquired, “What do you want to do today? I was in charge last time. Today, it’s your turn.”

    “I’ve been in New York one time,” you remarked.

    He shrugged, “So what? I showed you enough places last time you were here. Any ideas of what we should do?”

    You leaned back and folded your legs. “Hmm...well, you whisked me away before I could really look at Times Square...I believe you said I wouldn’t see the ‘real New York City’ if I stayed near Times Square.”

    Jack smiled, “Times Square it is.”

    The two of you hit all the tourist attractions on the famous block that day: the M&M’s store, Disney, Nintendo, Bucca Di Beppo. You and Jack actually ran into some of your classmates that were also along for your school trip. What was fun about that was coming up with a reasonable explanation about why you were wandering around New York City with someone who was pretty much a stranger.

    It was all over too soon though. Just like last time. Before you knew it, you were standing outside your bus and you and Jack were holding hands like a couple getting married.

    Jack affirmed, “I will never be able to make it up to you for the stuff you got me and the guys.”

    “Well you certainly made feel special when you told me you love me,” you murmured, only to him.

    He started kissing your face and neck while repeating over and over, “I love you.”

    The only way to get him to stop was physically bringing his lips to yours. “I love you, too,” you committed faithfully for the second time that day. “And I won’t stop loving you when I’m gone.”

    Jack hungrily kissed you again. He only stopped to agree, “Never in a million years,” before practically knocking you off your feet again.

    “Is this going to be a tradition, Y/n?” your teacher asked, one step from getting off the bus.

    You apologized, “Sorry, Mr. Q.,” but you were only centimeters from Jack’s lips then. You kissed him one last time, then ripped yourself from him to get on the bus. “I love you,” you were able to say before the doors shut.

    From the back of the bus, you didn’t let the tears silently fall until you couldn’t see Jack anymore.

*******

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I also would love a comment if you have the time. If you would like to read more, I have more fics about Newsies over on my page. You should check it out. Also, REQUESTS ARE OPEN. I take requests for one-shots, drabbles, multi-chapters, headcannons and preferences. No smut, please. I write for a variety of fandoms. If you’re wondering if I write for a specific fandom, please ask me. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you.<3

[theladylovingcrow]

No, Sam! (Sanny Fanfic)

*Crack Smut alert*

Author (As known on Various sites): Lady Lover- Rockfic, Luluthechoosingcrow - AO3, theladylovingcrow - Deviantart and Wattpad, @sammy_bluebells - Instagram, @imacrowcawcaw - main Tumblr, @theladylovingcrow - writing/art Tumblr, @insannywestan - Sanny shipping Tumblr

Fandom: Greta Van Fleet

Pairing: Sam Kiszka/Danny Wagner (Sanny)

Length: about 700 words

Warnings/Tags: crack, attempted humor, smut, Sanny, cockblocking, orgasmus interruptus or whatever it is, dirty talking

Summary: Short and shitty, I needed something to make me laugh this morning. Sam and Danny keep getting interrupted.

Author's Notes: This took like 20 minutes, I just wanted to do something funny with a little bit of dialogue I had. Enjoy!

@satans-helper (anyone else let me know if you want to be tagged in Sanny stuff)

-----------

"Come on, Danny. Please, please give me some, I'm dying for it!"

"No, Sam."

"Just a few little thrusts! Come on, what do I have to do to get you to fuck me?"

"SAM. Not now, okay? I think we should stop."

"But whyyyy?" Sam whined, doing his best puppy dog pout.

"Because I think I hear your parents in the hallway!" Danny whisper-yelled, eyes a little wide with panic.

"Oh, crap."

At that moment, raucous laughter rang out through the house, coming from right outside Sam's bedroom door.

The two on the bed shared a nervous look, wondering if they were found out.

"Oh! Kelly, did you hear that? 'I'm dying for it!'" Sam's mother yelled, voice mimicking Sam's, though it was strained with laughter.

"I think we should leave them alone, dear. They're probably very busy." That was his dad. Sam's face turned tomato red.

"Well, I don't think much is going on at the moment. Didn't you hear?" Karen repeated.

"Are you being safe, boys? STDs are still a thing, even if you're gay. Do you need some condoms?" Kelly asked, clearly standing on the other side of the wooden door.

"No, uhh... were good. Thanks, Dad," Sam bit out awkwardly, clearly not wanting to respond but also wanting everything to end.

There was some more snickering, and then a couple minutes of quiet where Sam and Danny still did not dare to move.

"Do you think they're gone?"

"Maybe. Oh damn, I kinda lost it."

"Yeah, I can tell. Want me to blow you? Gonna get you nice and hard, so big, want you to fuck me so bad. I'm so horny, Danny," Sam whispered the last part in his ear, clenching around Danny to punctuate his point.

Danny helplessly groaned and pulled out, moving up to straddle Sam's chest when-

"Aha! I fucking knew Sammy was the bottom bitch!"

Jake's voice, coming from... the window? Crap, the open window.

"Shit, we never closed the window last night. It was too smoky in here."

Sam gave Danny a 'now YOU shut up, idiot' look and called out to Jake.

"Hey, what the FUCK?! Can you leave us alone, please?"

"Aw, but baby brother finally got with his man! How could we leave now?"

Josh was there too, apparently.

Sam threw his head back and groaned in exasperation. "Ohh my godddd."

The twins snickered from outside, most likely thinking he was getting some good dick. The knowledge that they were probably standing on tree stumps just to reach the window didn't even bring Sam much comfort.

Danny was still awkwardly sitting on his chest.

"Uhh... should I go make them go away? Are we even gonna continue?"

"No. I'm not really in the mood any more."

"Damn, okay. Wanna watch a movie?"

"Yeah, sure. Why don't you go get The Dark Knight?"

While they had been talking, Danny had stealthily crept (more like crawled naked across the floor, which meant Sam had to stifle his laughter) over to the window.

He peered out, checking the surroundings. "Yep! They're gone. Fuckers are probably happy they ruined our fun," he muttered.

"Aww, baby, the didn't ruin nothin'! Get over here, sexy!"

Danny snorted and walked back to Sam, first making sure the window was closed and the door was locked.

"Your dirty talk is great, but only when you're actually getting fucked."

Sam looked offended. "Excuse you! My dirty talk is great all the time. I'm not even gonna blow you now."

"Well, if you don't blow me then it's gonna be hard to get fucked. Isn't that what you've been begging me for?"

Sam considered it. "Okay, yeah I'll blow you. God, I hope we don't get interrupted again."

Danny sighed and threaded his fingers through Sam's hair, letting him work.

"You'd think that finding alone time would be easier at home, not worse than on tour."

Sam hummed an affirmative, mouth a little too busy to respond with words.

*Bang bang bang*

"Samuel Francis Kiszka! If you do not return my jacket right this minute I am busting down this door!" Ronnie yelled.

"Oh for the love of God!"

"So... we're not having sex?"

"NO, SAM!"

[lydia-yougowith-stiles]

My Top Ships of 2017

We all do it. You watch a show and automatically root for two people to be together whether it’s a “slow burn,” the introduction of a new character this season or between two people that barely share a plot line. It makes you continue to tune in episode after episode. Here is a list of my personal favorite ships for this year, 2017, from some of my favorite TV shows/series.

12. New Girl--Nick and Jess 

Just about that time when your DVR recording was about to cut off (because you know mine did right before they kissed) Nick and Jess finally met each other in the elevator of their apartment building. I’ve always really loved the two of them together and as the show’s fate hung in the balance I was ECSTATIC that they readdressed their feelings in the finale. I’m super excited it was picked up for another season (the last one), but I would have been perfectly happy with this ending for the couple. 

11. Bates Motel--Dylan and Emma

This couple is still one of my favorite reasons to watch Bates Motel. Yes, the show was a great re-imagining of a young Norman Bates and I loved the new take on familiar characters, but I also loved the new characters including Dylan and Emma. After season 2 I thought the two would be cute together. They had only a few story lines or rather scenes together, but my shipping brain was at it again. And then something magical happened! It’s like the writers could hear my thoughts and THEY GOT TOGETHER! And you know what? They were SUPER, BEYOND ADORABLE TOGETHER. In its final season there was a time jump and this happened:

Needless to say I was over the moon. I’m still shocked they actually became a couple because I thought it would only be in my head. Love their ending and the family unit they created with their baby girl. 

10. Anne with an E--Anne and Gilbert

The Netflix original series brought a bit of a darker spin on the lovable tale by L.M. Montgomery, but just like all of the previous adaptations of Anne of Green Gables this version did a fantastic job showing Anne and Gilbert’s relationship. While Gilbert isn’t introduced in the first episode of this series, I eagerly awaited seeing him on the screen and I was not disappointed in his interactions with Anne; from the spelling bee to the classic Anne breaking the slate over his head. Several characters could tell the chemistry between these two (including one of my favorite characters Jerry). Thank goodness they’ll be a 2nd season so we can see this relationship progress.

9. Chicago Med--Rhodes and Reese  

Okay, so they might not ACTUALLY be together...yet (get on that writers!), but this year I discovered the ship between Dr. Rhodes and Dr. Reese from NBC’s Chicago Med. And I didn’t realize how BIG the fandom is! It was all thanks to season 2′s episode: Monday Mourning:

There’s just something about these 2 that is just so great! Their chemistry--wow! They just don’t get enough scenes together. In the current 3rd season (that’s unfortunately only been 4 episodes before the hiatus) they’ve had a few moments together (aka conversations), but it’s not enough. They keep getting set up with different potential love interests, when the writers should notice they have a good thing going already! Okay, rant over. 

8. Victoria--Victoria and Albert

After I finished binge-watching the first season of Masterpiece’s Victoria a few weeks ago, I was so sad there wasn’t more to watch. I needed more Victoria and Albert in my life. (Good thing the next season airs here in the US in a few weeks!) Going in, I didn’t know much about Queen Victoria’s reign, but was interested to learn more. I was pleasantly surprised with how addicted I got to the show, especially once Albert was introduced. I love how much they love and care for each other and know that rocky roads could be ahead, but am excited to watch the journey unfold. 

7. Grimm--Nick and Adalind  

Another surprise pairing that I grew to LOVE! In Grimm’s second to last season, Adalind (ex-hexenbeast, turned human, then back--I think I got that right) was pregnant with Nick’s child. This “romantic” pairing could have been weird, but writers made it work and personally I fell in love with it. [It probably helped that Juliet was turning evil and then became Eve. Man if you listened to this and had no idea of the show it would all sound crazy.] The two made a great little family with son Kelly and I was shocked when Adalind’s daughter was fine with Nick. I really enjoyed these two together as the show came to a close earlier this year. Another piece of proof that sometimes two characters can be placed together after so many seasons and really work. But how could you not root for them with this adorable baby? 

6. Reign--Bash and Mary

Reign was one of my first binge-watches of the year. So, I know this couple might not [SPOILERS] end up together, but for me they were one of my TOP ships. Mary and Bash have a big relationship during the first half of season one and as much as I knew she’d wind up with Francis (the unfortunate ‘perks’ of watching an old show) I could only hope for all the Mash moments I could get. Mary was a hot commodity on the show and I think her and Bash were one of the best pairings. I’m happy with the way their story-line ended and liked Bash’s alluded help in season 4. Even though I would have loved to see him back on screen. This will forever be one of my favorite moments:

5. Arrow---Oliver and Felicity

After a roller coaster ride of a relationship, Oliver and Felicity are OFFICIALLY MARRIED!!! (I guess you can say twice?) It’s been a long time coming and I know not everyone is a fan of the IT girl and the emerald archer together, but I have liked the two of them since day 1. It was one of my shipping moments of ‘this probably will never happen, but a girl can dream.’ I watched that season 2 finale when Oliver tells Felicity Slade thinks he has the woman that I love, a DOZEN times! I took any moment I could get. While there’s moments I didn’t love on this long journey, I am happy to see the two of them together and I love Felicity and William’s relationship. I’m happy that this year’s crossover finally made it official. We deserve it!

4. The Vampire Diaries---Caroline and Klaus

KLAROLINE!!! I have been a fan of this ship for SOOO LONG! And just like any good ship you take anything you can get. This letter to Caroline at the end of the series finale of the Vampire Diaries is JUST what fans wanted. (Plus, we had a few great moments in the season too; from Caroline bringing her girls down to see Klaus, and I still think about their phone call, which might be from the previous season.) My fingers are crossed and double crossed for the final season of the Originals that we might see Caroline (maybe more than once?? Is that asking too much?) I mean Hope is at the school and even though Klaus can’t see her we must find some sort of loop hole. We’ll just have to tune in and watch!

3. Supergirl--Kara and Mon-El

Before the heartbreaking season 2 finale and Mon-El’s return this season (MARRIED!), we saw the growth of an extremely cute couple filled with bickering, banter, and plenty of couch sessions. I loved seeing Mon-El adapt to Earth customs and for Kara step up as a mentor. Early on I felt the pull between these two because their chemistry was fantastic (as shown by their real life off screen relationship). I am so happy I got the 2nd season on DVD for Christmas to relive all these great moments:

2. The 100--Bellamy and Clarke

Another ship I have shipped since episode 1. I’ve taken every little glance, conversation, touch. Being a Bellarke fan has taught you to not take anything for granted. (Especially when you have heard from the creator that they don’t intend for these two to end up together. Come on!) But season 4 gave us fans hope. They had several playback worthy moments and that finale! WOW! It’s the end of the world and he’s making jokes with her. They are both touching each other! (I still have chills just thinking about it!!) I can’t wait for this new season even though I know Bellamy is going to be with someone because they HATE us. In the meantime here are some big moments from last season!

AND THE NUMBER 1????

I wouldn’t be living up to this page if I didn’t make them my number 1 because they and we deserve it!

1. Teen Wolf--Stiles and Lydia

It was a LONG time coming, but our pick was endgame, just like we predicted all along! Because the seasons were broken up I’m going to refer to season 6 as a whole (we deserved a lot more Stydia in the series finale, but that’s a rant for another day....) Despite, Dylan O’Brien not being around for more episodes due to his filming schedule, I think they did a nice job including him in the part A season. Sure, when I was watching it live I was pissed, but watching the episodes back I appreciate the moments we did get Stiles and how they included him in the season. Lydia and Stiles are one of my favorite couples of all times. I love their development, the chemistry between the two actors and strive to create characters who have such a powerful friendship and relationship. Here are some of the best moments from this year.

So, that’s my top 12 ships of 2017! A lot of my top couples were from shows that ended in 2017, so I can’t wait to see what new ones I discover in 2018. Let me know if you have suggestions!

[iamacolor]

What did you think of season 3 in general? I want to know because I personally think that the first half (and even more than half) was not that good, I feel like the episodes were kinda useless and boring and not that funny, and then there was the video game release episode and it felt like going back to seasons 1 and 2 and after this episode I felt like it was Superstore again, all those last episodes were pretty eventful and great! But yeah the first half was messy and badly done imo

Oh I’m really glad I’m not the only one who’s feeling this way! 

I think this season (at least the first half) is the weakest in terms of characters’ arc and storyline. At one point I even stopped watching for a few weeks and caught up later on because not only was I busy but it didn’t make me feel that need to watch it every week unlike the last part of the season did. In the last weeks I’ve been super busy but I always took the time to watch the episode because it felt much mor engaging and dynamic. Like things were finally happening! I haven’t watched back the season but I honestly don’t remember much from the first part so this is mostly going to be based on the impressions I have left (and also messy.

I think one of the problem is that most of this season has been mostly Amy centered. And I don’t mean it as in “Amy doesn’t deserve to be the main” but the writers decided to have most of her storylines be about how much of a mess she was after her divorce, how hard it was for her to “get back out there”. And so it didn’t make for a very engaging main character if she’s mostly the joke and there’s not much progress going on. Even the important dynamic of Jonah and Amy was dropped. They didn’t have many scenes together after the first ones that were awkward and tense and then it got better and instead they threw Jonah at Kelly. 

I don’t mind that much that Jonah got a girlfriend. But the problem is that since most things were said through amy’s pov, all we got of that relationship at first was that amy was jealous of kelly. We didn’t get to see many real relationship moments between jonah and kelly and for me the chemistry wasn’t there. And then when we got mor focus on the relationship it was during the second half when a lot of things between amy and jonah were happening and so things weren’t going great anyway. And this also means that for most of the season, all the jonah and amy content we got was amy’s jealousy and slowly realizing her feelings. I mean they were a few episodes where it almost felt like Jonah wasn’t into Amy anymore because they didn’t interact much but at the same time I think that the writers never managed to convey properly that Jonah was into Kelly so we got a weird situation.

The problem I think comes also with the fact that at the beginning of the season, the writers dropped the dynamics that had been explored in season 2. After the tornado I expected more of Dina and Garrett. There was clearly something there and, if not romantically, there is the potential for a real connection. Same goes for Jeff and Mateo. Mateo called Jeff during the tornado to confess his feelings so I was expecting something more at the beginning of the seaosn and instead nothing. I don’t remember much happening in the first part of the serie other than jonah dating kelly and moving in with garrett (which is something with a huge potential both for comedy and character dynamics that I think hasn’t been used enough) and amy being a divorced mess.

And then the video game release episode happened and I was like finally!!! finally!! that’s the superstore I love!

I was already interested in the story of dina being pregnant with glenn’s child, I thought it was really original and unexpected but showed growth in both characters and how they get along better now. I really liked Dina throughout the whole season tbh Watching her get closer and closer to Amy and also Cheyenne felt very nice and it’s now one of my favourite relationship on the show. But I disgress

The video game release episode finally gave us something that we had been lacking for so long. That Jonah/Amy connection. Not just amy pining on jonah or jonah pining on amy. But the two of them being together and behaving like they would never with other people. Being carefree and fun and it reminded me of all these moments they shared together in the previous seasons that showed us how well matched they were, how good friends they are. These scenes in the tunnels and the stock room are just a delight to watch.

And then finally Amy admitted her feelings and it truly felt like things were moving forward. And it’s like suddenly the writers remembered that they had to really give us something to look forward to. They also brought Mateo and Jeff around at the same time and gave them a really interesting storyline and reunion. I’m a bit disappointed that we didn’t get as much of Dina’s pregnancy explored but I’m hoping we see more next season although amy’s one will probably take the spotlight.

Every episode after that, we were given something good, something big, something to look forward to, something that would shake things up. The security footage release and its consequences, the beverage guy, jeff quitting his job, jonah being jealous, amy not being defined by the fact that she’s a divorcee and so on. The last episodes have been a feast as a amy and jonah shipper and even the fight was something I loved, everything felt earned and I think I’ve already expressed my feelings about the finale lol I’m just left with so many questions and nervousness now! And I’m still not a fan of the pregnancy plotline and still don’t see the point of it. Life is complicated I get it thank you superstore please move on to another obstacle for you main female character to overcome

I do feel that the writers wrote this season mainly about amy and that even the second half was mainly about amy and jonah which is a bit of a disservice to the other characters. Especially Garrett and Cheyenne who didn’t have much going on this season which is a shame. Especially since it makes it look like now that cheyenne went through a pregnancy and got married she doesn’t have a story to tell. And now that Garrett isn’t connected to Dina we don’t see much of him. Which is another reason why I’m sorry that they didn’t explore the roomate dynamic more.

I did love Sandra a lot though. She’s truly my favourite not-so background character. Just hilarious all the time.

The jonah/amy content in the last episodes was just a blessing,w e got so much more than I ever expected and I still can’t believe it and I’m shipping them harder than ever and I love them so much more now it’s crazy

Also I have to say that my experience of superstore has been higly upgraded by the fact that people started talking about it with me which made me get more involved in the fandom and in turn talking about it with more people and really thinking things through( with many long novels like this one I’m sorry) and it made the experience so enjoyable, it’s amazing. So that’s also one of the reason why I love the last pert of the season so much!

[orionsangel86]

13x01 - Episode Review Part 1

In which Dean just about held it together... and I did not. 

This review will be in several parts. I have separated it into several sections that I wish to talk about because hot damn. What an episode! This Part 1 focuses on Dean’s grief and Destiel and saying goodbye to Castiel. 

Firstly, an introduction

As I sit here, surrounded by three friends who I met on tumblr, BECAUSE of this show, I am amazed at how far I have come. I did not think that when I joined this fandom I would ever get to this moment, but my gosh what an amazing feeling this is. To all of you out there – reach out to people, you really won’t regret what you find. 

I adored this episode. I screamed, I even shed a single man tear whilst holding on to @amwritingmeta quite tightly… sorry Annelie if I hurt you at all. @tinkdw, @margarittet and @amwritingmeta you guys are wonderful and I am so glad that I have been able to flail and scream along to this awesome episode with you. Thank you for sharing this crazy obsession with me.

Part 1 - Love, Grief and Saying Goodbye

THEY USED METALLICA’S NOTHING ELSE MATTERS AS THE OPENING SONG! We were two seconds in and @margarittet had to pause because we all collectively SCREAMED that they chose to use this as the open song AS WELL! @tinkdw said that she wanted to try and guess what the opening song was this season but I don’t think ANY OF US considered that they would reuse “Nothing Else Matters” because its just so on the nose isn’t it? Nothing else matters? Nothing else matters than what exactly?

Well once again the “Then” sequence ends on Dean kneeling over Cas’s body.

The answer is Castiel. Nothing else matters than CASTIEL. This is repeated CONSTANTLY throughout the episode. You are not allowed to forget about him for a SINGLE SECOND and this opening song drums that home. Seriously if there are any Cas fans out there still bitter about Cas I dunno what show you are watching because it certainly ISN’T the show I watched yesterday.

It hurts to think about. What even was this episode? From the opening song “Nothing Else Matters” to the “Goodbye Cas” at the funeral pyre, this episode was chocablock full of moments that prove unequivocally that for Dean, Cas truly is his guiding light, his hope. Even if you don’t see their relationship as romantic you cannot possibly deny after 13x01 that Dean and Cas have an extraordinary connection and a deep and profound love that has now transferred to an even deeper excruciating grief in Dean.

Choosing to use this song as the season opener though? The season opener always reflects the tones of the season, the main themes. To have THIS song as the season opening? Wow. Just wow. This is a song that comes up first if you google “Metallica Love Song” by the way. In case you were wondering if it was indeed a love song. Because it is. James Hetfield confirmed it was written for a girlfriend. Interestingly though it has been debated over the years as the lyrics themselves are not conventionally romantic lyrics. Nevertheless, this is now fact: Supernatural used a Love Song called “Nothing Else Matters” to set the tone and theme of season 13, lingering over shots of Dean looking down at Castiel’s dead body. This isn’t even arguable. This is where we are.

(and what a wonderful place to be my friends)

Dean’s grief was beautifully portrayed by the superb acting skills of Jensen Ackles. In my season 13 wishlist I said this:

“It probably goes without saying but MAN PAIN OVER CAS – I mean, I reckon we are gonna get a good helping of this. Maybe not immediate tears but its gonna be pretty damn angsty – if the promo’s are anything to go by. I basically want it to be UNDENIABLE in canon that CAS is the reason that Dean is so broken up and that BOTH brothers are seriously struggling with his death. It has to be OBVIOUS how important Cas was to them and how his death has affected them”

I think we can tick this one off. :)

Continues under the cut.

The grief was so intense, it left me with a constant ache in my heart that still hasn’t shifted as I write this. From the first moment, Dean’s face in this episode brought me both intense pain and also intense joy. Bless Jensen for being such an amazing actor.

LOOK AT THIS FACE

There was a lot of speculation over the summer that Dean would just snap, pull out his gun, and go to shoot Jack once it sunk in that Cas was actually dead, and that is EXACTLY what he does. But that isn’t what broke me, what broke me is just how OFTEN the audience is reminded that ultimately, even though others died as well, for Dean, it is ALL ABOUT CAS. (Nothing Else Matters after all).

In the now famous sneak peek car scene Dean can’t even say the words when it comes to Cas SPECIFICALLY. He can admit that Crowley is dead, that Kelly is Dead and that mom is gone, but Cas? Nope. He chokes on his words:

(x)

Sam IS able to say the words. He can ask “Is Cas really dead?” Dean just growls “you know he is” and drives on. It is HEARTBREAKING.

The next moment we get that textualises the huge difference between Cas’s death and the other deaths for Dean is the moment during the fight with Miriam the angel when this wonderful exchange takes place:

(x)

Now we don’t actually know what was going through Dean’s head at this moment, but Miriam calls him out on it anyway - whether or not she was able to read his mind or she just went for the obvious assumption we don’t know. But Miriam doesn’t mention Mary, she doesn’t mention Crowley. She only mentions Castiel. This is in contrast to Sam’s discussion with Jack about reopening the portal, which is easily interpreted as Sam thinking of ways to use Jack to get Mary back, because we can understand that OF COURSE that would be Sam’s primary motivation right now. Sam still has hope. Dean doesn’t - except for the split second in this scene when he does. He falls for Miriam’s words, and it makes her “Oh sweety” so much worse.

The angels are usually exposition for Cas’s feelings for Dean, but in this scene, in a somewhat similar way to the scene in 8x19 with Naomi, they are exposition of Dean’s feelings for Cas, in a theme that is constantly running throughout this episode.

Finally once all the action is over and the boys head back to the cottage with Jack we get ten minutes of the emotional, poignant and touching moments that this show has ever given us. Enough that once I started sobbing, I couldn’t stop. 

I love Sam’s careful questioning to Dean:

“Are you sure about this Dean? I mean its Cas. Ya know? Maybe we can bring him back? Like you said?”

“No we Cant”

“Chuck did, um God did, remember that? So maybe if, I dunno, if we prayed to him or…”

“You don’t think I’ve tried that?”

Before I even get into the beauty of Dean’s prayer, THIS right here is ONCE AGAIN proving HOW differently the brothers view Cas. Sam is asking these questions, rather than telling Dean. Because he know that Dean is the authority on all things Cas. He knows that whatever Dean decides, he is going to go along with it. We have had this same theme running throughout seasons 11 and 12. Sam always accepts Dean’s decision when it comes to Cas. Always.

And yet we still don’t textually have a reason for this. Dean continues to refer to Cas like his and Sam’s third brother. So why are the two not treated equally? Yet again we have been shown the difference between the brotherly love between Sam and Cas and the ??? love between Dean and Cas. One is not the same as the other.

DEAN’S PRAYER

This is where I started to tear up. Honestly…

FULL PRAYER: “Ok Chuck. Or God or whatever. I, I need your help. You see you left us. You left us. You went off… You said, you said the earth would be fine because it had me and it had Sam but it’s not.  And we’re not. We’ve lost everything. And now you’re gonna bring him back. You’re gonna bring back Cas, you’re gonna bring back mum your gonna bring em all back. All of em. Even Crowley. Because after everything that you’ve done you owe us you son of a bitch so you get your ass down here and you make this right. Right here. And Right now.”

“Please. Please help us.”

Now, see this is where I squeal because he said “We’ve lost Everything. And now you’re gonna bring him back.” Because this CLEARLY reads as Dean saying that Cas is EVERYTHING (which fits in nicely with the theme of “Nothing Else Matters” to Dean) and I know there has been some debate over whether it was actually “him” or whether it was “em” that he said, but since the official CW subtitles caption it as “him” I’m gonna assume they are correct. And anyway, it says a lot when the official PR team use this specific interpretation – almost like they wanted to make sure we knew exactly what Dean was saying. Hmmmm… I wonder why.

The fact that we then get the pause where he turns away from the camera, waiting for a sign, anything, and it feels almost like we are interfering. Dean is hiding from the camera in his moment of anguish, and we are made to feel hopeless in light of his pain.

To then see Dean smash up the sign on the door (which I will talk about more in my Signs, Symbols, Ships and Handprints part of the review), and just finally show the extent of his emotional anguish and grief is again so fantastic for anyone still doubting Dean’s absolute love and adoration for Castiel:

(x)

This is a man who only prays in the most DIRE situations. Look at the desperation on his face. REVEL IN IT!

Moving on and honestly I didn’t think the episode could get more emotional than that prayer BUT I WAS WRONG. (Oh how much I underestimated Dabb when writing my wishlist!)

The way that Dean stands in that room, the high angle shot and the cinematography/lighting which makes it gloomy and almost sepia toned like all the colour has been drained out of Dean’s world. The way he looks both too small and too big for the room. Its sombre. Its silent. The atmosphere is drenched in sorrow. Its beautifully done.

(x)

The way he removes the shroud and takes one last look. His own private way of saying goodbye. Its Dean’s micro expressions both here and throughout the episode that I ADORE because you can tell so easily that he IS fighting back tears almost constantly. It’s the jaw clenching, the swallowing down his pain, I was half expecting a Darcy hand clench to appear.

(x)

His pain is so raw, so real, and so fucking heartbreaking. This is pain and grief for someone you deeply love on a whole other level. This is the pain of a lost spouse. Words can not describe how beautifully Jensen delivered these scenes. I don’t think I will ever be over just how intense this was to watch. I don’t think I will ever be able to watch it without crying.

We talked at our premier party about the significance of Dean wrapping Cas’s body. About how this is the first time such a thing has ever been shown (usually the show just cuts straight to the pyre). It’s a mark of serious respect to Castiel, as a beloved character on the show, and also, a nod to traditional ceremony’s in Jewish and Islamic cultures of the closest family members to the deceased preparing the body for burial. The fact that Dean does this on his own, without Sam, is also to highlight the difference in their relationships.

I stress again that Sam DOES see Cas as his brother. Because regardless of ridiculous arguments that try to state otherwise, Sam is not an asshole and made it clear last season that he too loved Cas deeply. So why is Dean doing all the work? Because Dean is not Cas’s brother. He is his freaking husband. He’s acting like a widow throughout this entire episode.  He is playing the dutiful spouse. In deep mourning, fighting back tears whilst he says goodbye to the love of his life.

(I’m crying again FYI)

But then even all THAT isn’t enough for Andrew Dabb. Oh no. He had to hit us with even FURTHER angst with the pyre scene and Sam’s heart breaking speech of goodbye:

“Thank you. You say thank you. And you say you’re sorry. You hope they’re somewhere without sadness and pain. You hope they’re somewhere better. You say goodbye.”

(x)

And in that moment Sam Winchester stomped all over my already beaten heart

Because this really was a send of to Cas. Yes Sam was talking about all of them, and we lost A LOT of great characters in season 12, and this was the writers way of paying respect to all those characters, but ultimately, like how he was at the forefront of Dean’s mind the entire episode, he was so very present throughout all of this, and the respect and love shown to Cas in this episode by the characters, the writers, the show creators... I’m in utter awe. It’s so much more than I could ever have asked for.

(x)

“Goodbye Cas”

And Dean just put in the final blow.

Once again though Cas is at the forefront of Dean’s mind. He comes first. That makes three times in this episode that Dean has listed out their fallen family. Every time though, Cas is separated from the others. Cas’s loss is on a different level to Mary and Crowley and Kelly.

Kelly was a victim, but her loss wouldn’t gravely hurt Dean

Crowley was an ally/nemesis who was sometimes something more. His loss gave Dean conflicted feelings.

Mary was their mother and that one would have hurt deeply. But Mary’s death was already an old wound, a new person in their lives who they didn’t really know. They were only starting to know her. Their grief over her will be strong indeed, but its not the same.

Cas was the loss that buried deep. Cas’s loss has broken Dean. Dabb has made it absolutely undeniably clear that Cas’s death is the focus of this episode, even when not directly mentioned (more on that later). And that Dean’s love for Cas is the very central theme of this entire season. Nothing Else Matters after all. Not for Dean. Not any more.

Thanks for reading! In part 2 I will explore the introduction of Jack and the narrative mirrors surrounding him in the premier. Watch this space.

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

i follow a lot of meta writers who say dean's story doesn't make sense without destiel. for example, amara was about exposing how dean felt about cas; the heart stuff how she found dean by touching cas' heart follow your heart all that. i ship destiel but don't think it will be endgame (wish it would be honestly). can i ask what do you think dean's story is without a destiel exposition? Do the amara and MoC and Mary story lines make sense without it? What is Dean's personal story and endgame?

Dear anon,

first and foremost what I want to emphasize going into this reply is that people can take away whatever they want from the show and read it in a way that suits their viewing of what happens on screen. All of what we see in those 45 minutes of television is influenced and shaped by our own experiences and interests, by the things that speak to us and move us or the aspects and topics we deem important. For that very reason readings and views will always differ simply because we all have our own focus. Things that stand out to one person, aren’t important for another for the sole reason that we tend to latch onto and project what moves us most into the narrative and analyze what plays out in the episode accordingly. What I mean is: it’s natural to disagree, there isn’t such a thing as ONE and ONLY ONE RIGHT reading. And there is nothing shameful or wrong about disagreeing with someone else, it’s all about how one expresses those differences of opinion. No one is better or worse or stupid for not seeing what someone else may see that doesn’t fit to your personal impression and perception of the show. In short: Live and let live.

The reason I am prefacing my reply with this long, more general ramble is due to the fact that I feel the fighting within the fandom over “right ways of reading and watching the show” or “people being too stupid to realize the show is saying this and this and not that and that” has gotten to a ridiculous and toxic point in which tolerance is lacking all around and on all sides and is seriously tiring to me, because it is just mind baffling to me why people can’t just be happy with what they read and see in the show and share it with the ones who see it similarly, but have to force their views on everybody else and get nasty over people having another view and takeaway than them and throwing around insults like there is no tomorrow.

With that all out of the way, let me tell you my view on Dean’s story. And just to make that clear from the get go :) no, I don’t think Dean’s story only makes sense when taking Deancas into account. It’s alright for me, if people argue that and feel that way, but to me it’s simply not the case and also imo takes away from Dean as a character in his own right.

I enjoy(ed) Deancas and like interactions between Dean and Castiel (though tbh since S11 to me a lot has changed and I no longer feel passionate or strongly about them, because to me the writers and how they handle the relationship atm is just too hollow and soulless for my taste, it simply no longer has the depth and “spark” for lack of a better word that it used to have in seasons prior, which still speak to me and move me when it comes to these two characters), but I do truly take issues with people arguing that Dean or his story only makes sense in relation to Castiel. I have the same issues with people arguing that Dean’s story and Dean only makes sense in relation to Sam. Of course both people are relevant to Dean’s story, but to me another person/characters should never be the most important thing about another character. So yeah, both of these viewings are the same to me in their essence, because in both cases it discredits Dean as a character in his own right in measures and ways I personally find very sad, because it belittles Dean. And Dean is much more than the people he loves (and this actually one aspect that is actually part of the show for Dean to realize) and that is kind of one of the main things that I personally feel relevant for Dean’s arc and possible endgame: seeing himself as worthy and important unrelated to any other person/character.

[[This week’s episode imo has highlighted a great deal how I personally see Dean’s story spanning from the first season onwards and what his struggles were and are that need to be overcome for him to be happy (if you browse my 13x03gif tag you’ll find all the meta I already wrote on the topic).]]

It may be for the very reason that Dean always puts others first and worries about them that people tend to see Dean only as an extension to another character. To me personally therefore one of the main things that has been explored heavily all throughout Carver Era and with that the Moc and Amara arc is addressing how “unfree” Dean has been all his life and how he has never truly listened or maybe even truly found out what he himself wants and is without the people he “cares for” (that is btw one huge point that was made in this week’s episode when Kelly told Jack that he didn’t have to be like his mother or father, but just himself and how this drastically differs to Dean who has been both unwanted - see meta and gifs for that here), because that very aspect - Dean thinking he needs to be this or that (mother, father and brother from age 4 onwards - as he himself openly now emphasized wasn’t fair) - has become Dean’s entire “reason for existence”. He thinks of himself as only useful when he can be of service and that is one tragic and horrible way not only of thinking about yourself (as unworthy, etc.), but also to live, because as the show has highlighted again and again when Dean feels like he cannot be of help, he thinks he lacks a reason to live and slips even further into a depression that is always glowering there just underneath the surface.

Due to all of what I mentioned just yet, I personally find it highly unfortunate that some people tend to make Dean all about Sam or Cas, because it falls completely in the trap that causes Dean so many issues since he himself only views himself as an extension to someone else, but that by no means means that that is right - quite the opposite. And that is also one of the many issues I have with Dabb’s showrunning and S12 in particular as in seasons prior the narrative addressed the discrepancy of Dean feeling like he matters least, etc. but that the characters around him constantly showed that that is not the case, but only something happening inside Dean’s head. Now S12 blatantly made it text that Dean does indeed not matter himself and I will never not be absolutely disgusted about that, because throughout the entire season we saw Dean put down, his emotions ignored, lied to (really, the way the season started, Mary trampling all over her son, is so emblematic of what happened throughout the entire season as well) and none of the treatment he experienced got corrected in the end, but Dabb friggin decided that it is a stellar idea to have Dean only briefly express how his mother’s death shaped him and messed him up (and yes, I get that it is in line with who Dean is and how he thinks so little of himself and putsothers traumas and needs first while ignoring his own, because they seem less important - see how that narrative thread runs through the whole show?) but that ultimately Dean as a person once more would disappear by making it all about Sam and talking about how Sam suffered (never mind Dean did and does too) and it also only then that his friggin mother is showing any kind of interest in her son. Only when her one son talks about the other son. Yeah, nice work there. But really, what took the cake for me with all that was how Mary didn’t even wrap Dean into a hug when he fucking saved her, but she opts to fall into Sam’s arms. Sorry, but gahhhh, I’ll never not be epicly pissed off about this.

Considering all this I am not surprised when people tend to think Dean has no story of his own or that it doesn’t make sense without Deancas or Sam on the other hand, but to me as someone who is most interested in each character in their own right much more than in any possible pairing, it is frustrating, because you feel like you are an island and belong nowhere. But sorry, I got caught up in my disliking of S12, I’m trying to get back on track now.

So given all that and the whole aspect of Dean’s “lack of freedom” due to feelings of responsibility are a huge aspect that to me was integral in the entirety of the MoC arc and the Amara arc as to me it explored Dean’s feelings of inadequacy and showing and exploring how Dean may have always been the main symbol for “free will”, but rarely has had it himself. In that regard, and I know this may be an utterly unpopular opinion to many, I have always analyzed Dean’s MoC arc and his time as a demon as a sort of “rite of passage” that served as a setting stone for Dean’s liberation, because it was as a demon that for the first time Dean only did what he himself wanted. It’s of course just one small aspect of a much more complex overall storyline, but to me it is an integral part nonetheless. Dean wasn’t happy as a demon by a long shot, but he did only what he wanted without feeling bad about having wishes of his own.

During the MoC and Amara arc Dean’s lack of independency from the people closest to him was amplified by making Dean unable to control what happened within himself when he held the blade or was in Amara’s closer vicinity. He was other directed, a puppet that got its strings pulled and that thread has been an integral one for Dean since we saw him strung up in Hell and torn apart (literally) by ropes tearing him apart every which way. To me there couldn’t be a more fitting and sadder visual for how Dean spent his entire life: caught in the middle, trying to keep a family together that drifted apart and getting torn apart and ending up hurt and damaged by trying to keep all of it together.

So in a way Dean losing his agency to the mark and then later Amara was just the utter extreme of showing how Dean for most of his life has not lived and done what he himself wanted, but what others needed him to do. The theme is right there, right from the beginning of the show and culminates for the first time in S4 and S5 when Dean rejects to become and be what Heaven wants him to be. The same strength he showed in relation to Michael, he never was able to show when it came to things his father demanded of him for example. There is a a famous scene where Dean articulates that himself in “Sacrecrow” in S1

and it comes back up here and there across the seasons when Dean expresses that he wished he would have stood up against their father more, etc. - the entire episode 9x06 “Bad Boys” also shines a huge light on that whole topic as we get a glimpse of the Dean there, who was allowed to be just a teen without feeling burdened and responsible to join his father’s fight.

For me Dean’s entire arc spanning over the course of the show is a storyline about self discovery about coming of age and coming into his own (an no with that I don’t mean a “coming out”-story, though of course it could be worked in or rather go hand in hand with that, but Dean’s sexual liberation to me has never been an integral topic from the beginning of the show and explored deeply until now, whereas the other has - again everyone is open to disagree with me, I have no problems with anyone reading it different, but this is just my personal feeling on the matter). It’s a narrative focusing on identity for someone who has never truly had the chance to become who he would have been if he had never had to be what others needed him to be. Phew… that was a weird sentence, lol. Anybody else got a knot in their brain now? ;)

And last but not least (though frankly I could write like 10 times as much as I already did since this is such a complex question) since you bring up the heart symbolism. I don’t mean to piss anyone off, but the heart symbolism as such has been surrounding Dean long before Castiel even came into the show (and it’s one of my favorite topics aside from “Dean as a christ figure” and I’ve written countless meta on that topic - I’m gonna leave a bunch of links to metas behind the cut at the end of this meta, for anyone who is interested in talk about heart symbolism, liberation, Amara and MoC arc etc. - some may even feature Deancas, but 95%  are just about Dean - it is by no means all I have written on the topic, but a good start), so to me - while I have no problem with people connect the heart symbolism in recents seasons to Castiel and Dean - they aren’t connected to another character at all, but are solely a symbol and metaphor for Dean as a character, because Dean’s heart has always been his biggest asset, but also what makes him so vulnerable. Dean is the “heart” of the show, as he serves as the PoV character. But most of all the heart symbolism surrounding Dean to me also belongs to the whole identity thread. It is also after all that Dean’s metaphorical death and re-emergence as a demon as a stepping stone to his liberation and coming of age (the healing part is still hopefully to come) is brought on by him dying by being stabbed through the heart…

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/121901277911/this-is-easier-some-more-thoughts-on-the

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/69379178845/dean-winchesters-heart-is-a-puzzle

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/131476588721/11x02-form-and-void-shes-a-miracle

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/98552189146/this-is-a-story-a-marvelous-story-full-of-love

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/87629591461/go-right-ahead-put-a-blade-through-your

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/67585667715/of-werevolves-tin-men-dean-winchester-and-his

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/110615479616/dustydreamsanddirtyscarsdeans-physical-and

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/66175602035/things-about-9x05-dog-dean-afternoon-3

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/127498203661/the-original-serpent-3

[legalmargamind]

Submission post: Mission Report : The Night Camila Killed Me

Okay, so I was super nervous for this entire thing! I was already having an emotional night because my date and I had been fighting ever since she landed a few hours before we were suppose to be at the venue. I decided to dress it down a bit because I wasn’t sure what C would be wearing so I wore tight ripped jeans, 6in Timbs and a long khaki coat over my blue blouse because it was cold af outside. My girl was wearing a black jumpsuit and a long black coat. I opted for medium makeup because I intended on dancing and enjoying all of the performances but really focused on the eyes because we all know she has a thing for green eyes.  Anyway…I watched her perform and her corset outfit on stage had me drooling like a typical fangirl. Her vocals were on point and she’s such an entertainer! I wasn’t sure I would still get to meet her but while I was dancing to Charlie Puth, I got the text from my connect to start heading backstage because I had less than 10mins to say hi. I dragged my girl behind me literally while we were being escorted backstage and when I saw C walking towards us through a sea of people, my breath caught in my throat. She looked like an angel from heaven. She was a tiny bit hoarse (sexy) and even though her handlers were watching the clock she made me feel like we had all night to talk 😏.  So, I introduced myself and she gave me and my girl the biggest hugs and she complimented my perfume and asked what I was wearing which is funny because her wifey, Ariana Grande and I wear the same fragrance lol. The first thing I noticed was my gaydar sizzling and pinging off the charts but maybe it was wishful thinking. I also didn’t realize she was so tiny but then again I was in heels and she is like 5'2ish lol.  After she hugged me we were ushered to a corner where tons of security and random people were walking by us and her people were hovering like secret agents. The entire time we were moving, she kept her hand on my lower back (like the daddy she is 😏). Lmao, so she asked where I was from and I told her and my date kinda hung back a little so she didn’t really interact with her much.   She complimented my eyes (score for me) and was so charming throughout our chat that I’m sure I was swooning. I told her I loved her set, she sounds amazing live and I had already pre-ordered her album and she seemed so genuinely surprised and grateful. I was like stop it you’re amazing and she hugged me 😏.  Juicy bits! OK, so I said she was talented and brave and she thanked me and asked what I did and I said I’m an ER nurse and she said that was really cool. And I was like eh some days lol. She asked what I did for fun because it must be stressful being a nurse and I smirked (I’m so glad you asked that Ms. Cabello lol) and I said I pretty much live on YouTube and Tumblr (😉) and she was like I love Tumblr! She said she doesn’t have much time to post like she used to but she still checks it out. I asked her if she follows herself on there and she said it’s weird to search for herself. I said she needs to check out the fanblrs and shipper blogs. I made it a point to say that I follow all the big Camila fanpages and shipper Tumblrs and started rattling off all of the popular Camren pages I could think of and she said yeah I think I’ve seen some of those but she wasn’t sure 😏. O.M.G she stalks Camren pages people!!! I knew she did! She said she’s so grateful for the fans that support her and share everything with her and she’ll always be grateful for all of us. Awwwwww! (side note: I think it’s interesting how comfortable she was with me bringing up Camren so nonchalantly like she didn’t bat an eyelash or try to change the subject at all. She was just like yeah I’ve seen those like it was something so natural.) So, I decided to turn it up a few notches and I brushed my hand on her waist and complimented her corset and said she looks so hot and I was drooling seeing her on stage and my date was jealous. She dished it right back and said she better treat me right or she’s gonna steal me away.  (ppl I almost died!!) She asked how long we were dating and I said we’re not dating yet because it’s complicated (it really is) and she said if it’s true love and I feel it then just go for it because we were both beautiful and she could tell watching us walking together that we had chemistry. This is when I fell for her (again), she said you just gotta go for it. Lol love advice from C herself! I said I was hoping to have our first actual date tonight after we left the concert and she held my hand and asked if I followed her on IG. (I nodded) and she said dm me and tell me how it goes. (ya’ll I died again) so I said of course! I said thank you for being so supportive and she said squeezed my hand and interlaced our fingers and hugged me again. I dunno why but I whispered I love you in her ear and she said I love you too and I stg we started dating from that moment lol jk of course. Her handlers came over and said she needed to go and she waved them off and said just a couple more minutes.  She asked me my age and said she thought I was like 22 and I was like awww thanks (she was just being nice) lol. I said she made my night and she thanked me and signed my ticket stub because I literally had nothing else for her to sign. She took a picture with us and I said she owed me a signature on her album and I’ll have it with me next time I see her in concert and she said she’ll take me out to dinner if she misses the opportunity to sign her album for me (so suave but did Camila Cabello say she’ll take me out? ☠️) and I blushed after I came back from dying again.  Her handler came back again and she said she had to go so we hugged again and she kissed my cheek and moved so super fast that she almost kissed me on the lips like it was at the corner of my mouth and I froze and she just smirked and said oh Im sorry and waved at my date and said I love you and waved as she was being pulled away and then she turned around and winked and that my dear fam is when I squealed and died a final time. My girl and I were being escorted back out to the front back to our seats but not before we saw Kelly Clarkson with her security and she smiled at us!! Omg such an amazing experience!!  I will forever stan C who is a beautiful angel, who was a true to life dork yet so suave and a sweetheart and I can still smell her perfume on my coat and I will probably hang it up in my closet with plastic on it and not wear it again lol.  I really didn’t find out anything we didn’t already know but Im hesitant to say she’s gay. At the very least she’s bisexual because if she’s straight then I’m a straight lol. She was sweet and comfortable even with me blatantly flirting with her and her energy was very strong but not overbearing which is what you’d expect to feel when a top is in your space. I think she’ll come out on her own terms but I would be surprised if she does address her sexuality publicly this early in her solo career and I would be surprised if she does address herself as straight because everything I experienced and being a lover of the ladies myself says she’s not even close to being straight. My gaydar has never been wrong ever!  I’m so glad I had the opportunity to meet her and I hope to meet her again in the future because I felt so warm next to her and she has this charm and sparkle about her that I’ve never experienced before. She’s beautiful,  present and supportive of the fandom and I wish her nothing but success in everything. 💝

[movietvtechgeeks]

Latest story from https://movietvtechgeeks.com/supernatural-gets-back-family-business-tombstone/

'Supernatural' Gets Back to The Family Business with Tombstone

I’ve been a happy Supernatural fangirl so far in Season 13, and episode 13.06 was also a win in my book. I’m not over the moon like I was last week, but it was a solid episode with great performances once again – both dramatic and funny as hell -- and some great directing by Nina Lopez-Corrado, one of my favorite SPN directors. Also a special shout out to Jay Gruska for the awesome music throughout the episode, both instrumental and song choice. This was one of those episodes that had a specific “feel” to it, with the writing (by Davy Perez), directing, music and set decoration all contributing to make it wonderful. Supernatural has done a Western episode before, so this one didn’t carry the first time thrill of OMG we get to see Sam and Dean in the old west, but it’s been a while, so I was eager to see Dean Winchester put on boots and a cowboy hat once again. And this episode marked a change in tone for the season that was significant– having Castiel back is that ‘one win’ that Dean so badly needed in order to rekindle some spark of hope so he can care again. He told Sam at the end of the last episode that he just needed a win, and he got a big one. Castiel is back, against all odds. That’s wonderful in itself, but maybe that means other things can change for the better as well. Dean has hope again, and a renewed belief that maybe what they do really CAN make a difference – just by knowing that good things can still happen. Miracles, even. I think we’ve all missed Dean’s personality this season since his usual sense of humor and ability to take great delight in even the smallest things has been quashed by his depression, grief, and hopelessness. In this episode, we start to see the Dean Winchester we know and love come back to life, and it feels almost as good as when I see that start to happen with a real person, whether a client or a friend. I’ve missed this side of you, Dean Winchester! The episode starts with a flashlight-lit chase in a graveyard with Dean and some sheriff guy we don’t recognize until he disappears down a hole grabbed by who knows what. Then it’s “48 Hours Earlier, ” and we’re back to where we left off, as Sam and Dean react to the surprise return of Cas. Sam: I don’t know what to say… Dean: I do. Welcome home, pal. You can see how desperate Dean is for that win – he barely hesitates, he needs to believe this is really Cas from the get-go. The relief on his face as he embraces his friend is palpable. Cas gets a Sam hug too, and soon enough they all figure out who probably helped bring Castiel back – Jack. [caption id="attachment_51128" align="aligncenter" width="696"] Caps by @kayb625[/caption] One of my favorite scenes was the Jack and Cas reunion. These two have an odd bond, forged before Jack was even born, but it’s clearly one that’s strong and very real to both of them. Cas and Jack hug – this episode is a veritable hug fest for Supernatural – and you can see how glad Jack is to have Castiel back. Jack: I missed you so much. Awwww. Jack just breaks my heart with his innocence and his absolute determination to make Sam and Dean (and now Cas) proud of him. He shows off his ability to finally move the pencil with his mind, the thing Sam asked him to do earlier. And he finds them a case too! Dean: How did you learn to do that? Jack: (proudly) I learned by watching you and Sam. This season really is My Two Dads. (Now My Three Dads…) Jack’s so proud of himself, so thrilled that he can finally do something FOR the Winchesters. At first, they’re all skeptical about pursuing it, but then Jack mentions that the case is in Dodge City, and you can see the moment it registers with Dean. He tries to hide it, but that little boy smile is already in evidence. Dodge City?? Cowboys!! Cas: (realizing what’s going through Dean’s mind) Wait, really? Cas looks at Sam for confirmation of his skepticism, the two of them both amused by and incredulous at Dean, which was all kinds of adorable. I love when Cas and Sam share an eye-roll over Dean that doesn’t really hide their affection for him one bit.   Dean: Two salty hunters, a half-angel kid, a dude just come back from the dead – again… it’s Team Free Will 2.0! Who can say no to Dean when he’s that excited about something? Not Sam and Cas, that’s for sure. Next thing you know, they’re in Dodge City, where the Impala looks just as damn sexy as she does in any other part of the country. Their hotel room is so Western-themed that it looks like an amusement park, much to Dean’s over the top delight. And I mean that in the best way possible. Kudos to Jerry Wanek and company for decking that room out to be amazing. Dean’s smile and excitement, and the way he geeks out over all the photos of gunslingers, knowing every detail about them? It’s fanboy Dean, one of my favorite things in the whole universe. I have missed that smile so much! Jack: (deadpans) He really likes cowboys. Cas: Yes. Yes, he does. Dean: This is awesome! We didn’t get too many scenes between the brothers in this episode, which I always want more of, but there was a nice little conversation between Sam and Dean that carries on that open communication thing that I’m loving this season. Sam: You’re in a good mood, huh? I love that Sam noticed and that he said something too. It’s the theme of this season – feel it, say it! Keep doing this, boys! Sam: You’ve been having a rough go of it. It’s good to see you smile. Awwww. Sam’s consideration for his struggling brother has been so heartwarming this season. Have I mentioned I really love you, Sam Winchester? And I agree wholeheartedly. Meanwhile, Nina Lopez Corrado directs the hell out of a very scary scene during which a hapless red shirted deputy gets killed by what turns out to be a grave robbing ghoul.  Nicely done, Nina! Cas and Jack stay up late and have a heart to heart while the Winchesters turn in. Jack: You can have the couch, I don’t sleep much. Cas: (deadpans) I don’t sleep at all. I love these two together, gotta say. They are both a little bit awkward, which it turns out is twice as hilarious when they’re talking to each other. And yet they’re both very earnest, so it tugs at my heartstrings at the same time. Cas apologizes to Jack for not being there for him, but Jack isn’t holding it against him. He also tries to encourage Jack to keep trying, saying that his mother believed that he was good, that he’d do good in the world. Cas: I know that she was right. That WE were right. Kelly would be proud of you. It’s a sweet moment, and Misha Collins plays it with just the right amount of emotion. This is a side of Castiel we haven’t seen that much of, when he’s open and expressive, and we get a glimpse of who he really is and how he feels. Also in keeping with this being the season of Tell-Me-How-You-Feel. And I like it! The moment is interrupted by Jack figuring out the next step of the case. He jumps up to wake Sam and Dean. Cas runs after him trying to warn Jack with ‘hey I wouldn’t do that….’  But Jack already has a hand on Dean, who predictably jumps up from a sound sleep with a gun already aimed at Jack’s head. Ummm… is it hot in here?? Competency kink plus two Winchesters in single layer tee shirts??? Yeah, it’s definitely hot in here. Dean: (grumbling sleepily) Who’s makin’ me coffee? Cas to Jack: I told you, he’s an angry sleeper. Like a bear. That was fodder for all sorts of internet jokes, but it was also just delivered in a very funny way. Despite this being an emotional episode, everyone brought their A game for those little comedic moments, and they all hit just right. Dean indeed refuses to speak or get up and do anything until he’s had his coffee, which he conveys to Cas with just a hand signal. Also hilarious. And Dean is still wearing only a tight tee shirt. So yeah, it’s still hot in here. We’ve also gotten some interesting tidbits of character development this season, sometimes in small moments like this one. Dean’s grumpiness in the morning and his love of coffee are common in fanfiction, for example, so it’s nice to have those traits confirmed in canon. Sam and Jack head out to investigate the grave robberies, and Dean and Castiel head out to investigate the murder. Dean insists they need to “blend in,” which means we get the long-anticipated scene of both Dean and Cas in cowboy hats. Dean has to adjust Castiel’s hat and give him some instruction in how to behave first because Dean is an authority on all things cowboy, which is adorable. Dean: Act like you’re from Tombstone. Cas: The town? Dean: The movie! I made you watch it. Cas: (longsuffering) I’m your Huckleberry. Dean: It’s good to have you back, Cas. Satisfied, Dean gets out of the car. Thank you, Nina, for the slow-mo montage that lovingly pans up Dean Winchester in all his Western decked out glory as he does, from those gorgeous boots to those long bowlegs to the white shirt and bolo and scruff and hat. Mm mm mm. Dean and Cas “saunter” up the road, Impala gleaming behind them, “Space Cowboy” playing as they walk. It was pretty epic. I enjoyed Dean and Cas getting to play cowboys, and their scene together was cherished by anyone who happens to ship that ship. I’m all for everyone enjoying whatever it is they enjoy about the show, though articles that try to get hits by setting it up as a zero-sum game (it’s either Dean and Cas or it’s Dean and Sam) just create dissension and tear the fandom apart. So boo for that. Anyway, I enjoyed their cowboy dress up (though I admit I would have loved to see Sam decked out too!) The sergeant, however, is not all that impressed – which is HILARIOUS. All the kudos to guest actor Eric Schweig who made the best faces every time Dean or Cas said something questionable. Cas: I’m… my name is Val Kilmer. I burst into laughter. Dean just closes his eyes in defeat. Sarge mistakes them for Texas Rangers, which makes Dean gleeful. He tells them the murdered man was his nephew, who he’s known since the boy was a day old, and now there’s some emotional resonance at the same time as Sarge’s skeptical “mm hmm” keeps making me giggle. Kudos to all the actors and to Nina for making sure every single humorous moment landed perfectly. Meanwhile, Sam and Jack surprise the town undertaker, a young woman named Athena. More great music is playing on her headphones – about Zombies no less. Just as Sarge was skeptical about Cas, Athena is skeptical about FBI agent Jack. Athena: He’s an FBI agent? Did his parents sign a permission slip? Sam: He’s a trainee… Kudos to guest actress Sarah Troyer for bringing real personality to Athena even in a small role – I think we were all rooting for her (both to survive and to dump that crappy boyfriend…) Sam eventually digs up a gnawed up bone in the graveyard, and now they know it’s a ghoul. When Cas and Dean return, Jack manages to pull up surveillance footage and now they can clearly see the guy driving the truck before the murder. Dean: (delightedly) That’s Dave Mather! Dean once again geeks out over the gunslinger, even if the actual person has been dead for a very long time and this is actually a ghoul wearing his face and adopting a lot of his persona. Jack: (delighted to be helping): That’s Athena’s boyfriend! Dean: Let me get my boots on! We find out that Dave isn’t exactly the nicest guy – he doesn’t respect Athena’s boundaries and seems awfully pushy to me. Oh, and he’s a ghoul. I mean, she doesn’t know it yet, but I feel like he was sending out some pretty clear signals about what kind of boyfriend material he is – as in, ‘run away run away!’ The Impala pulls up to Athena’s house with fabulous Spaghetti Western music playing,  where Athena tells them Dave headed to the bank. He’s already pulled off a bank robbery, but is confronted by Sam and Dean with rifles drawn. Somehow, the Winchesters – who we know are crack shots – manage to miss nearly every one. What the hell, Show? Finally, Jack steps up to save the day, using his powers to knock Dave on his ass after Dave shoots him. Tragically, that also makes the poor security guard fly through the air – and right into a concrete pillar. Jack is horrified, looking stricken as the guard lies there bleeding. Jack begs Cas to heal him, but Cas can’t. Sam: He’s dead. Dean chases Dave into the street, nearly gets run over (by a car whose driver must have thought huh that guy’s carrying a big rifle…) and loses him. The Winchesters aren’t exactly the awesome hunters they usually are today, are they? I don’t really like that, Show, just so you know. The three dads discuss what to do while Jack sits stricken in the other room. Finally Dean says that Sam and Cas need to take Jack back to the bunker, for his own safety. Dean goes after the ghoul alone, which always makes me nervous. He meets up with Sarge, also there to take no prisoners. The two understand each other in a way that reminds me of Henrickson and Dean in early seasons – two hardened men, ready to do what needs to be done. Dean and Sarge understand each other. Dean: Where’s your badge? Sarge: Don’t need one. This is family business. And if anyone understands family business? It’s Dean Winchester. We return to the opening scene, and Sarge soon disappears, pulled into the deep hole in the ground in the graveyard. Dean runs up to find only his hat beside the gaping hole. Dean: (looking down) Ah hell. (Jensen Ackles’ Texas twang much in evidence, much to my delight) Dean looks again, shaking his head and talking to himself. Dean: Mm mm, no. I don’t wanna…Okay… And in that split second, he talks himself into doing what he needs to do and throws himself down the hole anyway. We know how much he hates crawling through the very skinny tunnel, dirt all over him. His gun gets stuck, and Jensen Ackles’ comedy genius is showcased a thousand percent. Dean: Perfect! (spits out dirt loudly) Sure, come to Dodge City, have some fun… When he comes to the end of the tunnel, he throws himself out the exit right onto the floor in a heap. By that time, I was laughing out loud. I bet Ackles ad-libbed some of that – can’t wait to ask him at the next con I’m at! The bad guy comes back shortly after Dean discovers a tied up Athena and a beaten up Sarge, and he orders Dean to get his hands up. Dean complies, but slowly, exchanging a wordless plan with Sarge.  Dean taunts Dave, but it’s Sarge who fires from behind him, blowing the ghoul’s head right off. Once the dust has cleared, Sarge asks Dean what happened – because he clearly knows that’s the theme of Season 13. Sarge: What actually happened back there? Dean: Dave killed the deputy…and the guard…you killed him. I was never here. Sarge: Fair enough. I kinda love Sarge. Meanwhile, Sam drives back to the bunker, Cas riding shotgun and Jack in the back. Sam and Cas try to convince Jack that it wasn’t his fault, that it was ‘just a mistake,' but Jack isn’t really having it. Back at the bunker, Dean returns. Sam asks him how it went. Dean: Usual. Killed the bad guy. Saved the girl. He makes it sound so simple, but that is such a big deal for Dean right now.  This is how Dean defines his purpose in life – this is what he does, as a hunter. Saving people, hunting things. Recently he hasn’t been able to do that, and it drove him into a deep depression. Now he’s got another win, added to the return of Cas. He’s back to doing “the usual” – and it must feel so very very good. Sam: And the guard? Dean: I took care of it. That brings an explosion from Jack, who is feeling terribly guilty. He demands to know if the guard had a family, and Dean doesn’t lie to him. Dean: Yes, he did. Sam again tries to say that it’s okay, that this life is difficult. Jack: DON’T. Sam raises his hands in surrender, and you can see the moment that registers with Jack. Jack: (dismayed) You’re afraid of me. Maybe you’re right…maybe I’m just another monster. This time it’s Dean who responds, and it sorta makes my eyes water. Dean: No. You’re not. I thought you were. I did. But like Sam said, we’ve all done bad. If you’re a monster, we’re all monsters. It’s a good speech, and Dean means it, but Jack is actually the one who’s terrified – terrified that he’ll hurt someone else. Terrified that he’ll hurt Sam and Dean and Castiel. Jack: (despairing) I can’t even do one good thing. I know that if I stay, I’m gonna hurt you, all of you. And I can’t. You’re all I have. Oh, Jack. Where are my tissues? Jack: I have to do. I’m so sorry. He blasts the three of them to the floor, and he’s gone – with the sounds of wings. Castiel: Jack!!! Sam: He’s gone. I knew Jack would be going, but I’m full of trepidation about what that means. Will Asmodeus try to turn him again? Will he succeed, now that Jack is alone and vulnerable? Finally, Dean believes in him, but now Jack doesn’t believe in himself. It really is breaking my heart. On the other hand, the Winchesters are getting back to being the Winchesters, Cas is back, and things seem a bit more hopeful. I’m sure that just means that Show will break my heart a million times over, but for right now, I’ll take it. Fingers crossed for episode 7 War of the Worlds which you can see the trailer for above. Check Out Our 2017 Holiday Gift Guides: [abcf-grid-gallery-custom-links id="50643"]

Movie TV Tech Geeks News

[wroughtbetwixtfanfic]

Stamped Into Memory, Ch 2.

Fandom: The Society.

Summary: One night is all it takes to throw Campbell's carefully maintained control into chaos. Caught in a downward spiral and once again public enemy #1, he struggles to keep those around him safe-- from a killer on the loose, and from himself.

Rating: Mature.

Tags: Major Character Death, Canon Divergence, Mental Health Issues, Family Issues, Substance Abuse, Slow Burn, Dubcon Kissing, Romantic Friendship, Mild Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, Unhealthy Relationships, Canonical Character Death, Fix-It, implied animal death, the dog lives, Antisocial Personality Disorder, ASPD, Campbell has mild ASPD and is actively trying to not be awful

Word Count: 4307

Ch 1 || AO3

Life tried to go back to normal. At least, whatever normal had been before. It wasn't working. It had been days, close to a week. No one was doing anything. The food staff wasn't coming in on time, or at all, from what Campbell heard. Garbage was rotting on the roadsides. Campbell tried to go out and do what he could; it was what Cassandra would have wanted, and it kept his mind occupied, but it was just too much. The last job he'd had according to the charts had been clean up, but people were making messes faster than the messes could be managed.

Most days, Campbell ended up as Cassandra's grave. He'd clean away the leaves and dirt, make sure the candles were lit, and check for vandalism. No one had dared to do anything. Probably because Campbell stayed and tried to get his head clear. He couldn't talk to her, not yet, but just feeling close to her was enough to soothe some of the terrible ache in his chest. Elle was one of the few people actually going to work, and Harry was holed up in his house, so it wasn't like Campbell could distract himself with them. Even when Elle was home, it was like there was some wall between them. She slept in her own room and barely spoke. Well, maybe it was grief. Everyone processed it differently. And now, everyone seemed on edge. Stressed out. Suspicious. It was hard enough to deal with when it was a freak accident, but now there was a murderer in their midst. Campbell couldn't blame Elle for needing some time to think things through, so he went about his work and figured she'd talk to him when she was ready. Besides. It gave him time to try and get his mood under control. Not that it was working well. The smallest things felt like mountains, and little shit he hadn't cared about before set him off; he'd kept his fists to himself so far, but only because Campbell redirected his anger. Someone ran into him at lunch one day, and Campbell ended up putting a hole in the drywall of the hallway because he just wanted to make something break. At home, he tried to make breakfast but it had burned, and he'd ended up throwing the plate against a wall. "I'm sorry," Campbell said when Elle rushed in to see what had happened. "I'll clean it up. I just..." But he couldn't finish that sentence. There was no excuse, so what was the point in trying to make one? He shouldn't have done it. Elle said nothing. She brought him a broom, and Campbell cleaned up the mess as promised. They ate breakfast in silence, hugged at the door, and went about their days. Campbell hadn't even gotten to work, though, when his phone rang. Dillon was on the other end of the line, his voice strained. "Hey, Campbell? You told me to contact you if I noticed anything weird with Harry." "Yeah?" "Something's weird. He's just laying out by the pool. Kelly came to see him and she left looking pissed. He hasn't moved in hours." "I'll be there." Campbell hung up the phone and changed route. This was a mess, too, and a far more urgent one than hauling food scraps to the dump. Dillon let him inside and gestured to the pool, his expression more than a little concerned. Campbell went alone. Harry was laying on his stomach, hand in the pool water and tracing shapes in the dark green water; there was a scum forming on the surface of the water, and garbage floating in it. Disgusting. "You're gonna get a disease from that water," Campbell said, using the toe of his shoe to tap at the bottom on Harry's foot. "Get out of there." Harry rolled over and sat up. His pupils were huge, and the smile he gave Campbell was a little too sedate. "Two visitors in one day. Lucky me." "What are you on?" "I don't remember." Campbell sighed and grabbed Harry by the arm, hauling him up and sitting him on a pool chair. "You can't do this, Harry." He brushed the dirty off Harry's face and clothes. "You can't keep getting fucked up and letting yourself drown." "Why not? Maybe I should." "Do you honestly mean that?" "I dunno. Maybe." Sitting down, Campbell let Harry lean against him. "Do you really feel like killing yourself? Be serious with me." He stroked Harry's back when Harry gave a tiny, quick nod. "Alright. Look, you're coming back to the house with me. Just for a few days. There's the guest room left over, and you're taking it." If Harry had been planning to argue again, he decided not to. Campbell didn't know much on how to help people, but he knew that back when he wanted to hurt himself, it was Harry and Cassandra who help keep him going. Being around a bunch of snippy people cluttering up his space wouldn't make Harry feel better. Campbell followed Harry back inside and helped him gather some of his things; it was more than a few days worth, and Campbell wondered if Harry already had a hunch that he wouldn't be coming back any time soon. Before they left, Harry stopped by his sister's room and picked up a framed photo of the two of them, and a weird stuffed toy. "She loved those goddamn Ugly Dolls. I got it for her for her birthday," Harry mumbled. "It was her favorite thing." "Don't talk like she's dead, okay?" "What if she is?" Campbell shook his head. There was nothing he could say, because he had no idea what was true or not, and trying to convince Harry that everything would be fine was a waste of breath. All he could do was take him back to the house and help him unpack. The guest room was downstairs and overlooked the garden; it was quiet and beautiful, and with any luck it'd bring Harry some sort of peace. The one thing that concerned Campbell in all of this was Elle. He hadn't asked her about letting Harry move in, but she'd been supportive before of Campbell trying to help him. Elle came home not too long after, with a few other girls walking with her. Campbell was sitting on the front steps, waiting, and preparing in his head some big long speech about what was going on and why Harry needed to be there. "Is everything okay?" Elle asked, tilting her head as she approached. "You look worried." Campbell stood and came over to kiss her on the hair. "I am, a little. Harry's been having a rough time, so I told him he could stay with us for a few days." "Oh. Well, we have the room." "We do." "It should be good, right? Will it help you, having a friend around?" It was a good question. Campbell had only known that if Harry killed himself, Campbell would be out two of the three most important people in his life. He couldn't just let that happen. But Elle was right. Campbell had been a mess, and the idea of Harry being close did make him feel a bit more comforted. "Yeah, I think so." "I'm glad." Elle kissed his cheek. "I should go say hi, then." Thankfully, the two seemed to get along once they actually shared the same space for more than five minutes. Harry, when he was alone and away from obnoxious so-called friends, was quiet and placating; Elle was introverted, but kind. Campbell made dinner while they kept him company, and once Harry lowered his guard and sobered up a bit, it was the first nice evening Campbell could remember having since Cassandra died. But then Campbell noticed something... odd. Elle was avoiding him. Campbell had brushed it off as being upset, before, but as the first week of chaos oozed into week two it became obvious that something was off. She slept in her own room, spoke less, and took more shifts to the point that she was only home in the evenings. She flinched sometimes, or would give him a strange look that almost was appraising. Like she was trying to decide something, but couldn't figure it out. Was it because of his behavior? Campbell considered it, and decided it had to be. He knew he'd been more moody lately, but he had tried hard to make sure he hadn't hit any walls or thrown anything. Still. Had he scared her? Campbell went to work and mulled it over, and decided he'd talk to Elle that night; if something was wrong, it'd be better to get it out in the open sooner rather than later, wouldn't it? He knew there were rumors going around that he'd killed Cassandra, or knew who did. Kyle, apparently grateful for the wheelchair ramps that had sprung up around town after Campbell's suggestion, had let him in on that not-so-secret secret. Emily was friends with Gwen and Lexie, and she'd told him the two had been whispering about it. Elle worked with Emily and Lexie in the kitchen sometimes. It was a little suspicious. But Elle believed him. Didn't she? "Do you think I'm capable of murder?" Campbell asked Harry when he got back home, bringing Harry a cup of tea. "Honest answers, please." Harry was wrapped up in a blanket, huddled in bed still with a five-day shadow. He sipped the tea, considering, then shook his head. "Come here." "What?" "Come here. Come on." Campbell flopped into bed next to Harry, startled when Harry tossed half of the blanket over him. "What are you doing?" "Trust me. Just stay there for a few minutes." It was stuffy, but some combination of darkness and the weight of the blanket helped Campbell relax a little. He didn't remember feeling tired, but Campbell woke up a bit later, groggy but far less jittery than he'd felt before. Crawling out from the blankets, Campbell blinked at Harry, who was laying next to him and staring up at the ceiling. "Is that why you're in here all day?" Campbell wondered. "You're tired?" "A little. I feel tired all the time. My body hurts. But also, I just don't want to be conscious, so sleeping takes care of that." "Ever considered trading in the partying for an antidepressant?" "Sometimes." Campbell sat there for a moment, watching Harry. He wanted to offer some sort of comfort, but he didn't know how. Instead, he got up and headed to the kitchen to make dinner before Elle got home. Boxed mac and cheese wasn't anything super fancy, but Harry liked it, and he needed to eat; it didn't need to be fancy, it just had to have calories. Campbell made some frozen vegetables to go on the side. He knew they should go eat at the cafeteria like Cassandra had wanted for everyone. If he could just get Harry back on his feet... Elle came through the door a little bit after everything was ready. "Hey," she greeted. "That smells good. I smuggled home dessert." Dessert was, as it turned out, Twinkies that Elle had snagged when no one was looking. Not an honest move, but it seemed to boost morale with all three of them, so who could complain? Campbell poked around at his food while Elle and Harry discussed what was going on outside. It was nights like this that Campbell wondered if he was imagining things. Everything appeared to be normal. Happy,  calm. After dinner, Elle took a shower and was doing her night routine when Campbell wandered in, hoping she was in a good enough mood to talk a little. "How was today?" "Weird. Bad." Elle rubbed some sort of serum on her face. Turning around, she leaned against the sink and crossed her arms over her chest. "Do you know Brandon?" "Eggles? I had to knock a lot of sense into that one. He's a loser. What did he do?" "He was walking around today with a gun hanging out of his pants, like it was no big deal." Campbell stepped closer and settled on the counter next to her. She looked down at the floor, but not before Campbell saw the taut expression on her face. "You're scared of him." "We all are. Shit, Campbell, we're scared of everyone. People have been walking around in packs. A bunch of us walk together at night now, and we're always looking over our shoulder. It's terrifying." "You could have called me to come get you." "I didn't want to bother you." Since when would it have bothered him? Campbell held his tongue, because he knew before he asked that he hadn't been the best company since the shooting. "I know I've been irritable lately, and I'm sorry. I'm not dealing with the loss. But I can't lose you too, Elle. Let me protect you." "That's such a guy thing to say." "Look, don't be that way. It's not a bother to walk you home. I promise I won't let anything bad happen to you." Elle pushed off the counter and brushed past him to go out the door. He followed, but she always kept a few paces ahead of him, and moved so that the bed was between them. "You can't promise me that," she said. Her eyes held a cold sort of anger he'd never seen from anyone before. "You can't promise me something like that, unless you know something I don't." "What does that mean?" "Some of the girls were talking, and--" "Everyone in this town talks!" he interrupted, his voice rising. Campbell took a breath and forced himself to speak calmly. "They all accuse me of shit, they always have. You know I didn't do it. You said you believed me." "I had to lie for you." "So what? I told you what happened." "You were with me all night. That's what I'll tell them if people start poking around. You were with me when it happened, so you couldn't have pulled the trigger." Campbell felt his stomach drop. "But?" "You've been acting strange, Campbell. It worries me." And there it was. Campbell tried to find something to say, some words that would convince her completely, but he knew there weren't any. He could see it on her face that someone had said something. Someone had turned her against him, or tried to. And wasn't it his own fault, for it being so easy to believe? "Elle, I promise you, I had nothing to do with what happened." Elle stared at him, then seemed to deflate. She pushed her face into her hands, and let out an unsteady sigh. "I need to go to bed. I'm really tired." "Hey." This time, when he stepped forward, Elle didn't move away. Campbell curled his arms around her and gently kissed her temple. "Let's go out and get lunch tomorrow, okay? Just you and me. We can talk about this once you've had some sleep." She nodded, leaning against him for a moment before pulling away and going to her room. Campbell lay in his own bed, eyes trained on the ceiling as he tried to convince himself to sleep. There had to be a way to fix this. Maybe if he just found someone else to talk to... Harry wasn't an option, and neither was Sam. He had no right going to Sam and exoect mental health advice. But maybe Grizz? Grizz seemed level headed, and maybe he knew some way to get better. Not that it'd do much good, if Elle didn't want to fix things. But after a long, sleepless night, and a long morning of getting Harry comfortable and fed, Elle showed up from her morning work shift right at lunch. She was waiting by the cafeteria door, and she smiled faintly when Campbell arrived. They didn't say much. At least, not until they got to their table. Once they sat down and got comfortable, both of them tried to talk at once. "You first," Campbell offered. Elle toyed with her little carton of milk. She tried to to open it, but of course they never opened quite right. "I just remember what Cassandra said, when we had the meeting with just us girls. And Blake," she added. Blake had come out as genderqueer the year before. "And saying it was just a matter of time before someone got raped. But you know, she got murdered instead. And I just... Nothing feels safe anymore." "And I made that worse." "Honestly? Yeah." "Do you really think that I'd ever hurt you?" "How am I supposed to know? You've beaten other people up. I mean how long is it before you..." Elle trailed off, stabbing her knife into her milk carton and prying it open. She didn't have to finish that sentence. He knew what she was thinking. "I just don't want to be scared." "Is there anything I can do to fix this? I can read some self-help books, or something. I can leave for a few days." "Leave?" "Until I get my shit together again. I can do it." Campbell knew how it sounded. He knew I'll change I swear and just give me another chance usually never worked out, but what other option was there? It wasn't to late. He'd always thought that he'd done pretty damn good, all things considered, but he could be better. "I want to be better, for you." Elle started to reply, when a loud bang rang out through the cafeteria and people began to scream. Campbell dove at Elle and snatched her wrist, pulling her under the table. He couldn't see what was happening, but he could hear two voices yelling. Their best bet was to figure a way out and run. But it was an open area, and he didn't know if the shooter was between them and the exits or not. Was it worth the risk of getting shot? Suddenly, the fire alarm went off. A horrible move. There was a stampede as everyone rushed towards the doors. Campbell covered Elle as best as he could as a wave of people rushed by; they tucked into a ball on their sides, and Campbell covered Elle's head. Once there was a safe opening, they both bolted out from under the table and made a break for it. He kept a hold of her so they wouldn't get separated; there was an exit out the staff room that most people didn't know about, and Campbell led them out through it. They made it outside and kept running until they reached home. "Fuck," Elle gasped at they stopped in the front yard. Campbell had never heard her curse much, but Elle was shaking hard and clinging to his shirt as a long string of expletives followed the first. "This can't keep fucking happening." Campbell held her tight, stroking her back. "No, it can't. Are you hurt?" "No, I'm okay. Just pissed." "Would you be okay staying here with Harry? I need to go find Allie and Sam." "Yeah. Text me." Kissing her hair, Campbell waited for her to get inside and lock the door before heading out on his own. Where are you, he texted to Sam. Are you and Allie okay? Sam answered within the minute. Everyone's safe. We're home. Are you okay? Is Elle okay? We're just shaken up. Where are you? Heading over. Campbell locked his phone before Sam could text back and tell him not to show up. He had to talk to Allie, now, before things got any worse. Something had to be done to get the town back on track. Of course she would be grieving, he understood that, but there'd be more dead to bury soon if someone didn't take control. Knocking on the door of Cassandra's... Allie's home, Campbell was surprised when Grizz opened the door. "Where's Allie?" "Not a good time, Campbell." "And it won't be for a while. Seriously, let me talk to her." "About?" "About who's taking over for Cassandra. As much as I love the whole Survivor vibe going on out there, it's going to get people killed." Grizz frowned. He glanced over his shoulder, and Campbell could see Luke, Sam, and some others sitting at a table behind him. "We've been talking about that, actually." Stepping outside, Grizz closed the door behind him and lowered his voice. "Finding someone to take over and enforce the rules." "Yeah? And who have you come up with?" "Nobody. The only ones here who actually know what they're doing would just have a big target on their back anyways. You know what this town is like. No one's gonna listen to Will or Gordie. Don't suppose you know anyone who'd be interested?" The problem was image, and social context. Wheels started turning in his head, dark thoughts dancing along them. Campbell had ideas that Cassandra had never gotten around to implementing, things he could get done, but he'd need a pretty face to present them to the crowd. Harry would have been ideal for that, but Harry was too low and he would be challenged for sure. Why Harry? What right did he have to step in? The only way Harry would get in would be if he got on his feet and looked like an ideal alternative. It was clear who should take over, for the time being; if she sunk the ship, it'd be all too easy for Campbell to arrange things to his liking. And if she did a good job, well, there'd be no need to interfere. Either way, win. "Allie," Campbell said. "It has to be Allie." Grizz walked over and herded Campbell a few paces away from the house. He leaned closer, whispering. "Do you think she'll go for it? I mean, we all know that Cassandra was the serious one. Allie's just... different." "She won't want to, but she has to. It makes sense for her to. If anyone else tries to grab for power right now, it'll just be a bloodbath. If she steps up, she has a reason to. She's shadowed Cassandra enough, she knows how things go. People will pity her. That'll last just long enough for her to get her feet under her." "How do we convince her?" "Do you know anything about anger management?" Grizz scratched his head. "Wait, what does that have to do with anything?" After Campbell just stood there tapping his foot, Grizz tossed his hands up in the air a bit. "Yeah, yeah. I guess. I mean, I had some social stuff growing up I had to learn on my own. I was really into Jung for a while. Why?" "She'll take the idea better from you guys anyways, so I'll tell you how to convince her if you help me figure out how to deal with all this shit before I lose Elle." "Who says you're gonna lose Elle?" "The hole I punched in the wall at school." "Oh. Oh, well, uh. I can try. Yeah. Yeah, I'll do it." "Fantastic." Campbell peered up at the house to make sure no one was listening through any of the windows. "Cassandra wasn't just her sister. She was everything. When Sam got sick, me, I got anger and bitter. Allie got protective. Allie would have given anything, done anything. She would have traded her own life for Cassandra. Use that sense of duty." "That feels so underhanded." "In case you haven't noticed, underhanded is my thing." Rubbing the back of his neck, Grizz sighed. "Why do I feel like I just shook hands with the devil?" Campbell smiled. "I'll talk to you soon?" Grizz gave him a tiny mock salute before retreating into the house. Sam was coming to the door just as Grizz was trying to go in; they looked at each other a moment, and Campbell smirked at the little blush that came over them both as they scooted past each other. Cute. "What?" Sam signed, catching the amusement on Campbell's face. "Stop that." "Nothing. I was just going. Happy you didn't get trampled, bro." "Don't go. I miss you. I don't want something bad to happen, and have this be the last we remember of each other." "And I don't want that either, Sam." Campbell kicked at a little patch of grass. Might as well explain as best as he could, before one of them got shot next. "But I did what I did to try and keep you safe, okay? I get it. I do. But we've always butted heads, and I think it's better for you if we keep our distance a bit longer. I want to keep you safe from me." "That's fine." Not what Campbell expected to hear, but the look on Sam's face-- calm, determined-- seemed to say he meant it. "Take whatever time you need. I understand. But I'm not asking to come back home. I just want to be able to see you. You're the only brother I have." "And you're not worried I'm some killer?" Campbell scoffed when Sam didn't reply. Really? Here they were, having the you're my only brother talk, and the kid couldn't even say he thought Campbell was innocent? "Right. Figures." He started to walk away, but arms wrapped around him from behind; Sam hugged him hard, burrowing his cheek against Campbell's back. Campbell turned, hugging Sam back. When they pulled away, Sam looked sadder than Campbell had remembered seeing him in a while. Campbell ruffled Sam's hair; Sam went back inside without another word. Campbell watched his back for a moment before turning towards home. Small steps forward were better than nothing.

[taeguboi]

PAPER HEARTS -- A JinKook Headcanon

I just became ultra emo at my own idea about how Jungkook covered ‘Paper Hearts’ by Tori Kelly and how Jin always creates them! 

Also, I’m too lazy to write a full fiction so it’s a hc

Also also, I say Jinkook but it’s not like a romantic ship this time

It’s the year 2020something, so this means Jin has had to enlist and do his 2 years army service

You know, the army as in not referring to the fandom

Because I think we can all agree

He’s done more than enough service for us :)

Of course, the band don’t want to release material as a 6 piece without their eomma

Who by the way, leaves us with a beautiful solo EP to keep us going

So they pursue solo careers and even sub-units to keep gifting ARMYs with music!

There’s Rap Mon and Agust D with more hot mixtapes

Not without a sub-unit of Jimin and Suga called ‘Mini’ though 

[ Min + Jiminie if you didn’t catch that ]

Jungkook would definitely release a solo album, maybe even reaching different countries

I wouldn’t go as far as to say American debut just yet

But it’s definitely on the cards

Because come on

He’s like a Korea’s Justin Bieber 

I can’t explain it, he just is

There’s a Sunshine Line sub-unit [ V / Jimin / J-Hope ]

It’s called Sunshine, written as 선샤인 also known as Shine Line because someone probably made a mistranslation

or Bangtan Sunshine 

I haven’t decided yet

[ tbh ‘Bangtan Sunshine’ has more of an edge in Hangul imo 방탄선샤인 ]

[ Bangtan Sonyeonshine?... 방탄선년샤인? ]

I also thought of ‘JJV’ because I wanted it to be like the CBX unit of EXO but that’s too much like JJP

[ lmao I say this as if I have control of their futures ]

anyway

Oh and V is obvs acting still and has snagged another role on a drama

It’s about the same amount of lines as Hansung but this character is more serious; he’s a troubled young man that the main character comes across and he shares his life story and it gives the main guy some sort of epiphany

Sorry

Back to the main focus of this hc

and J-Hope will have dropped his mixtape that was so fire that it burned down an entire country

and either Suga appears on a track or they have a Sope sub-unit as well

Sorry

Also, that’ probably WAY to much to happen in a year

idk maybe some of it’s stuff that’s being going on in the background in preparation for Jin’s leave [and the others’ leaves eventually too] and now it’s all being put in the spotlight

So Jungkook is alone in the dorm, which seems to be empty whenever he gets any spare time lately

Omigod! She’s actually gotten to the frickin’ point now!

Yes I know

The sunshine line are out doing recordings and promotions and fan meetings

Suga-hyung and Rap Mon-hyung have bought their own places and don’t live here anymore

They drop by when they can, but like Jungkook, they’re extremely busy

He decides the dorm is a little messy and he should clear up a little

‘A little’ becomes a bit more thorough as he finds himself sorting and rearranging almost everything

And his hyungs have all been working especially hard over the past few days because it’s time for promotions for their first release as a sub-unit

So Jungkook figures it’d be a nice gesture on his half to tidy and clean the other two bedrooms

Admittedly, there isn’t a great deal to do though because the guys still manage to keep their rooms in pretty decent shape

So he finds himself having a little nosey, mainly in the room that J-Hope-hyung has moved into

Because VMin boyfriends share a room forever of course

It’s only natural for Jungkook’s mind to wander to Jin-hyung as he takes a curious peak under one of the beds

Jungkook wonders how Jin-hyung is doing, hoping that he’s looking after himself the best he can, that the lifestyle isn’t too hard on him...

He briefly tries to imagine himself in Jin-hyung’s shoes in about 5 years time -- maybe sooner if he decides to go when Jimin-hyung and Taehyung-hyung enlist

But his train of thought soon drifts back to Jin-hyung specifically again as he glances out of the door, half wishing expecting his elder to be at the door like 

“Yah! Jeonggukie! what are you doing in mine and Yoongi’s room!”

Jungkook smiles at the thought of his hyung scolding him and he returns to his own room since he’s finished his fair share of the chores 

In his room, he feels a little cold, so he picks out a jacket hanging on a rail

It’s one he hasn’t worn in forever and it looks cosy enough, so he puts it on

Content with just the idea of laying down on his bed and relaxing, he does exactly that 

He has a little think about the things about Jin-hyung he is most looking forward to seeing again

Which is everything to be really honest

Even the little things that sometimes got on Jungkook’s nerves

But I’m not gonna separate which is which hahahaha

Bad dad jokes

Yet being his temporary mom at the same time

Delicious food

His awkward charms

and the smooth ones he gives to ARMYs

Windscreen wiper laugh

To keep his hands warm, he places them in his pockets

And as you do with a forgotten jacket, Jungkook finds himself absent mindedly rummaging the pockets

And he can feel a piece of folded paper

Which is curious

Since he never really needs to write anything like lists or notes to remember things

So he takes the piece of paper out of his pocket

That’s odd, it’s a red piece of paper...

He unfolds it

It’s a heart 

that Jin-hyung must have put in his jacket 

After all, this jacket was used on stage

It was probably a back up plan to show off his charms on stage

Jungkook wonders if any of the other members have come across any paper hearts in their jacket pockets or just lying around.

I feel the need to mention that this is just for fun / to be a little emo [although my initial ending was much more depressing soooo]. Please don’t take everything I say ever on this post seriously.

I think I’ll add this to my fiction masterlist in case I do more like this