#it works perfectly with the continuation of the story but even as a standalone ... amazing

[thecomicsnexus]

TMNT: SATURDAY MORNING ADVENTURES #5

SEPTEMBER 2023

BY ERIK BURNHAM, DAN SCHOENING, LUIS ANTONIO DELGADO AND ED DUKESHIRE

The other half of the turtles and frogs fight against Baxter Stockman.

SCORE: 9

This book is walking a very fine line between what the art team should and shouldn't do, and I am under the impression that the line is still blurry. Should they have a more manga approach to storytelling? Or should they try to keep the cartoon format?

I don't have an answer yet, but I have a feeling that a manga format would work much better. There are just too many characters and very few pages to explore them all.

As a result, these past two episodes only resulted in one small thing for the overall arc. But if you somehow skipped this issue, I am not even sure it would matter.

Having said, that, the art is what makes the book so amazing.

The past few episodes made it clear that the stories were taking place between seasons 7 and 8. Since Baxter never appeared in last three seasons, they have a lot of freedom to work with him. They also solve the inconsistencies in his late appearances with a wink to the camera.

However, this is where the continuity gets weird...

That looks a lot like the Hall of Science in the New York's World Fair. If you remember those first red sky seasons episodes, Shredder and Krang moved there after they "evicted" Berserko. Does this mean we are already in season eight?

Or is this intentionally ambiguous?

I think it's OK if they prefer to do every adventure in some kind of timeless season, but they should probably make that a little more clear. By adding elements of the eighth season, I have no option but to assume time passed since issue 1, and Krang already faced Berserko.

Of course, the second episode of that season was the last appearance of the Rat King, and he had a very different look then... since we just saw the Rat King, does that mean we will see him change looks in this book? We'll see. Next episode will be about Chrome Dome.

One thing I really love about the art in this issue, is the use of perspective. It's something that for one reason or another, wasn't that common in the TMNT Adventures title, and it works perfectly here, especially in panels with the Turtle Blimp.

It was also a good idea to add a roll call at the beginning so that we could learn which one was Genghis and which one was Napoleon (although in this case, coming after Mutant Mayhem, it was a little easier to identify Genghis).

Anyway, as I said, I love the art, but the story was a bit inconsequential. It was more like a bucket list of pending ideas that never materialized in the cartoon.

I also feel a bit conflicted about suggesting the manga format, because the main title has struggled with pacing since its conception, and having a standalone turtle story every month is kind of refreshing. But I don't know... I am feeling like more could be done with the format.

Again, maybe the writers and artists in this book are still trying to figure out what works better. We'll have to wait and see what happens.

[xjoonchildx]

greedy | myg x reader | chapter one: you like milkshakes?

summary: being a loner has never bothered yoongi until now.  until you.

pairing: yoongi x reader

genre: mafia AU, pining, eventual smut

rating: 18+

word count: 4.3K

notes: confession, i am struggling these days with my insane attraction to min yoongi.  this guy has it all.  looks and talent and mystery and sweetness -- he’s the total package. so i really wanted to give him a story in this AU that i’ve come to love so much and i truly hope you guys enjoy it.  

i also hope you guys know how much i appreciate every single one of you. i see your reblogs and comments and likes and i try to answer every one because it truly makes my day.  you guys make my day.

i could not post this fic without shouting out the amazing @hobi-gif because honestly, if hope didn’t read it, did i even write it? and i’m sending major love to three people who are such a source of laughter and support for me, @ladyartemesia​ @ppersonna @taetaewonderland. you guys keep me in stitches.

this fic is a continuation of the Guarded Series but can be read as a standalone piece! Chapter 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05

*************************

Yoongi had fucked up.

He’d misread the massive man’s approach, tracking him in one direction when the guy was actually headed in another.  That’s how the asshole managed to catch Yoongi off guard with one meaty fist to the face. 

It didn’t matter that it was hundreds of pounds of fat -- not muscle -- behind that punch.  It was wielding more than enough momentum to blow up the side of Yoongi’s face like a bomb. 

That’s the night he landed in the ER at Songdo at nearly two in the morning, pressing gauze to his bleeding face.  

That’s the night he found himself chuckling inside an empty exam room, reading triage paperwork that made him sound like some kind of war hero instead of just an idiot who got caught looking the wrong way.

That’s the night he met you.

“Rough evening, Mister Yun?” 

Yoongi had looked up from the floor just as you’d breezed into the room, tablet in hand.  That moment marked the second time he’d been caught off guard that night.

“That looks like it hurts,” you’d murmured sympathetically, eyes raking over the bloody mess on his face.  Your gaze was clinical -- professional -- as you assessed his grossly swollen eye and the half dozen bleeding cuts that surrounded it.  

But then you’d stopped looking at him -- and stepped back to really look at him.  

Yoongi had taken one look at your enormous, dark eyes and your soft, sweet face and he was dumbstruck.  He’d blinked back at you with the only eye that could still move.  

“You’re a doctor?”

“Nope,” you’d replied casually, turning to reach for a pair of latex gloves. “I’m a janitor. But I’ve always wanted to give this medicine thing a try. You don’t mind, right?”  

Your eyes had sparkled then, bright with humor -- and Yoongi couldn’t help but grin despite the pain pulsing from the left side of his face.

“Here’s the deal, Mister Yun,” you’d said, pulling on your gloves.  “I’m a resident.  And I’m more than qualified to handle the -- situation -- on your face, but if you feel more comfortable waiting for the attending, I’m happy to step back.  Good luck seeing him before sunrise, though.”

“Nah,” Yoongi had chuckled.  “I think I’ll take my chances with you.”

“Good call.”

You’d leaned in close after that, gloved fingers firm under his chin as you turned his face from side to side.  You’d smelled fucking amazing.  The light, fresh scent that lingered on your skin sure as hell beat the disinfectant odor in this place.

“What happened to you tonight, Mister Yun?”

“It’s a funny story, actually.”

“Oh, great,” you’d said dryly.  “‘Cause it turns out, I love funny stories.”

Yoongi had flinched when you’d peeled the gauze back, exposing the angry wounds to the air.  But he’d forced himself to sit dutifully still as you got to work cleaning the caked blood off his face and eye.

“Thing is, I work for the circus,” he’d started, hissing under his breath when you swiped across an open cut above his eye.  “One of the elephants got rowdy while we were practicing a number tonight and just kicked me right in the face.”

You’d stopped dabbing at his eye then, one brow raised and a cynical slant to your mouth.

Yoongi liked that you knew he was full of shit right away. 

He liked that you’d played along anyway.

“God, I hate when that happens,” you’d said with feigned outrage, cutting your eyes at him as you dropped a piece of bloody gauze on the tray at his side.  

“I know, right?”

That’s when Yoongi had won a real smile from you, wide and genuine.  That's when Yoongi made the mistake of looking at you for just a moment too long.  

He knew it by the way your smile fell away as you cleared your throat and turned your focus back to his damaged face.

“Well, I have good news for you Mister Yun,” you’d said after a while, eyes scanning the freshly cleaned wounds.  You’d run your gloved fingers gently over one particularly deep slash over his eye and Yoongi felt a shudder run up his back.  “I’m pretty sure you’re going to live.”

“Well, that is good news.”

There was that smile again.  

It seemed like no time at all before you had him all patched up -- cuts sanitized and sealed with skin adhesive; swollen eye cleaned and medicated.  Yoongi had felt a strange kind of disappointment as he’d watched you gather your supplies, pull your gloves off and drop them in the trash can near the door.

“You’re all set, Mister Yun,” you’d murmured. “Watch out for those elephants, okay? I’d hate for them to ruin a perfectly nice face.”

Then you were gone.

***************************

Thing is -- Kim Namjoon is a rules guy.

It doesn’t matter that he runs a criminal organization -- or that the men in his employ are gangsters in custom ties and suits.  He expects dirty work done clean because that’s what sets the Gajog apart.

Rotate hospitals.  Use fake names.  Pay in cash.

All of those protocols are in place to keep any one of the Gajog from drawing unwanted attention.  Truthfully, Namjoon’s operations usually run so neatly his men rarely have to seek treatment for anything beyond the occasional black eye or broken bone.  That’s why he’d rather trust his men to legitimate doctors in legitimate hospitals than hand them over to some back-alley hack.

Thing is -- shit has gotten a lot more heated of late.  

An audit of the Gajog books has turned up millions in missing won, stolen over time by street-level guys all over the city.  Yoongi and Hoseok are the ones on the front lines, tasked with confronting those men -- getting them to pay and getting them back in line.

Sometimes they play ball.  Sometimes they don’t.

Tonight is one of those nights.

Yoongi knew the moment they arrived at the crumbling warehouse in the Nowon district that shit was probably going to get messy.  Their contact was fucked up -- sloppy drunk -- and belligerent from the jump.

After that, everything was a blur.

At some point during the scuffle, Yoongi heard his hand crunch under the heavy weight of the man’s steel-toed boot. The pain was still flaring hot from his knuckles when Hoseok finally took the guy down.  

Right now Yoongi should be at Asan or Gachon or any of the other half-dozen hospitals in the city.  He should have dragged his tired ass and bloody hand across town because those are the rules.

But instead -- for the second time in a month -- he’s sitting under the sickly fluorescent lights in an empty exam room at Songdo at nearly three in the morning.

Hoping to see you. 

*************************

Yoongi is gingerly flexing his aching fingers when a light knock sounds at the door.

It was a long shot that you’d be here tonight -- and an even longer shot that you’d be the one treating him. But when the door to the exam room opens, it’s you on the other side.

Yoongi’s pulse picks up in response.

“Sorry to keep you waiting tonight Mister -- ”  you stop dead in your tracks, eyes wide on his before darting back down the tablet in your hand.  You scan the screen slowly then look back up, gaze critical.

“ -- Mister Woo.”

“Yeah, sure,” Yoongi replies casually.  “It’s no problem.”

You approach him slowly then, disbelief etched into your delicate features and Yoongi takes in every detail.

It’s like he’d forgotten how pretty you are since the last time he saw you.

You’re nothing like the flashy women who like to hang around the usual Gajog haunts.  You’re the kind of pretty that doesn’t cost hundreds of thousands of won a month to maintain.  The kind of pretty that doesn’t come off at the end of the night. 

Yoongi swallows thickly as you eye him, lips parted like you’re about to fire off a hundred different questions.  But you don’t.  

You play along.  

Again.

“Right.  Let’s get to it then, Mister Woo,” you say carefully, slipping on your gloves.  “What happened to your hand?”

“Well, you see, I’m a hot air balloon operator.”  

His mouth quirks into a smile and your eyes flash in response.  

“Wind was nuts today and the basket came down on my hand.  I think I might have broken something.”

“Hmm,” you murmur.  “Hot air balloon operator, huh?”

Yoongi winces when you take his hand between your gloved ones, gently applying pressure to each knuckle.

“Yeah.”

“That’s an interesting way to make a living, Mister Woo.”

Yoongi chokes down a groan when you press against one particularly sore spot.  You back off the pressure, turning to make a note on your chart.

“Well, I’m an interesting guy,” he whispers.  

You look up at him then, dark eyes focused and intense.  

“That you are.”

You’re looking at Yoongi like you can see inside him and the scrutiny makes him squirm.  He lowers his eyes to the floor and keeps quiet while you clean his hand and apply ointment to his cuts.

“Mister Woo, it looks like most of these are surface abrasions, but the knuckles concern me.  I’m going to have to send you for an X-ray.”

“Yeah, okay.  It hurts like hell.”

“I bet it does,” you say quietly, typing into your tablet.  “Someone is going to come and take you back when they’re ready.  I have to go check on some other patients, but I’ll be back when we have some images to go over.”

“Sure,” Yoongi breathes.

You take another long look at him before standing to leave and Yoongi wonders for a moment if he’s made a mistake. Maybe he’s misread you like he misread that brawler who caught him with the nasty punch all those weeks ago.  

You could be off to flag a security guard.  Or leaving to call the police.

He really should have just followed protocol.

Yoongi sits in the quiet of that exam room waiting -- ready -- for trouble that never comes.  Because when a knock finally sounds at the door, it’s not the Korean National Police.  

It’s the X-ray technician.

Maybe he didn’t misread you after all.

*********************

It takes hours for you to come back.

“Mixed news tonight, Mister Woo,” you say upon your return.  “You have hairline fractures in three of your knuckles, which explains the pain.  Unfortunately, that means I’m not going to be able to do much for you beyond wrapping your hand.”

Yoongi nods.  “Got it.”

“And you should probably lay off the ballooning for a while,” you say under your breath as you lay out your bandages.  “Just a suggestion.”

“Good idea,” Yoongi chuckles.  “Safety first.”

You fix him with another one of those long, indecipherable looks before getting to work on his hand.  But you don’t say anything and the longer the silence stretches on, the antsier Yoongi feels.

“So…” he exhales, clearing his throat, “... you like milkshakes?”

“Everyone likes milkshakes,” you return evenly.  You don’t take your eyes off his hand or the flexible material you’re carefully wrapping around his sore knuckles. 

“Lactose intolerant people don’t like milkshakes.”

“Lactose intolerant people like milkshakes as much as the rest of us,” you argue.  “They just can’t tolerate them.”

“What are you, some kind of doctor?”

Your lips quirk with the threat of a laugh you manage to suppress but Yoongi catches the expression before it disappears.  You seem to relax after that.  He does, too.

“Dijeoteu has the best milkshakes in the city.  Ever been there?”

“Can’t say that I have,” you admit, taping off a bandage.  

“It’s not far from here.  Open twenty-four hours.  I hang out there sometimes.”

“So you’re a milkshake-drinking hot-air balloon enthusiast,” you murmur, inspecting your handiwork closely.  “Anything else I should know about you, Mister Woo?’

Yoongi scratches the back of his neck with his free hand.

“Not really.  That about covers it.”

You hum thoughtfully under your breath as you finish wrapping the bruised knuckles.

“All done.  How does it feel?”

“Better,” Yoongi admits.  “Thanks.”

You gaze at him then, thoughtful -- expression soft with something that looks almost like concern.  Yoongi drops his gaze down to his bandaged hand.

This is the part where you’ve finished -- the part where you leave.  

This is the part where he should say something to you but he has no idea what or how.

“I would say come back soon, but this is a hospital and that seems wildly inappropriate,” you announce, voice breaking clear through his stupor.

You turn back to him just as you’re walking towards the door, and for a moment Yoongi thinks you’re going to give in and ask him any one of the dozens of questions that must be swirling around your mind.

But you don’t.

“Try to take care of that hand, Mister Woo.”

Yoongi nods.

“Thanks, Doc.”

**********************

YOU

Doctor Lee is on his Houdini shit tonight, apparently.

The ER is packed -- waiting room crowded with crabby patients -- and you are, once again, running yourself ragged to get to every last one.  Lee is, once again, nowhere to be found.

“Page him again,” you call out as you pass the charge nurse outside an exam room.  

A quick scan of your tablet confirms the toddler behind this magic door has been vomiting all night.  You shut your eyes and wish a slow, violent death on your absent attending.  Vomit is the single worst phenomenon in medicine.

“I’ve paged him three times,” Nurse Ko calls back.

“Page him again,” you repeat, forcing a smile and pushing into the room.

Thirty minutes and one change of scrubs later you are checking charts on the next patient in line.  You pat the pocket of your new scrubs and realize you’ve left a half-eaten energy bar around here somewhere.  

No chance you’ll get that back.

Lee picks this moment to reappear, back from doing God knows what.  He strolls down the hallway like a man with nothing on his to-do list.

“You paged for me?” he inquires casually.

“A few times, actually,” you mutter.  “I’m getting killed out here.”

“Relax,” Lee purrs, condescension dripping from his tone.  “We’ll get it done.”

You bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from firing back the half-dozen nasty responses that spring to mind. There is no we when it comes to Doctor Lee.  He’s always been flighty and inconsistent, but these days he’s practically a missing person.  You’re still not sure how hospital management hasn’t figured out that he’s making his resident run the overnight ER.

“There’s a guy down the hall who says he swallowed a magnet,” you say, waving a hand in that direction.  “If you can pick him up I can get to this head trauma.”

Lee sighs like it’s a major inconvenience that you’ve asked him to do his job.

“Yeah, I’ll grab it.”

***********************

It’s nearly four in the morning by the time you have a chance to catch your breath.

You walk out to scan the waiting area and to your relief, there are only a handful of patients yet to be seen.  Then your eyes land on one young man -- slumped into a chair in an oversized coat, hat pulled low over his eyes.

You freeze.  

The man in the chair must feel your stare from across the room because he straightens, giving you a better look at the face hidden under the brim of his hat.  You let go of a breath you don’t realize you’ve been holding.

It’s not him.  

It’s not the mysterious man with the fake names and the bogus stories and the insanely handsome face. You shake your head as you look back down at your tablet, silently chastising yourself for even entertaining the thought.  

You shouldn’t still be thinking about this guy and you know it.

But it’s driving you nuts that you can’t figure him out.

He’s never tried to play you for pills and that seems to be the only thing people lie about these days. But if his problem isn’t drugs it’s certainly something because no one lands in the hospital that many times, with that many phoney stories unless they’re up to no good.

So you ignore the nonsensical disappointment you feel when the guy in that chair is not the guy. 

Because deep down you know he’s either in trouble -- or he is trouble.

***********************

Your pager goes off for a second time and you silence the alert, tossing it onto a nearby blanket.

It’s not like you’re hiding out in here -- not really. 

It’s just that you’ve already had one patient cough up blood on your sneakers and another swing at you when you refused to give him narcotics, so this night is off to a spectacularly bad start.

Besides, Doctor Lee could use a taste of his own medicine.  

This week has been the worst, by far.  You’ve been seeing at least three patients to his every one and you’re exhausted.  If there’s any justice, he’s walking into the exam room where the infant with explosive diarrhea is waiting to be seen -- you check your watch -- right about now.

The door to the linen closet cracks open and you groan, hiding your face in your hands.

“What, you thought I didn’t know about your little hiding place?”  Nurse Ko asks with a grin.  “I find everyone’s hiding place, eventually.”

“Haven’t found Lee’s yet,” you gripe. 

“Yeah, well he’s sneakier,” she laughs.  “Here, I brought you something.”  

She tosses a granola bar at you and it lands in your lap.  

“Thanks,” you sigh, ripping it open.  You take a bite and Ko leans against the doorframe.

“I don’t page you for my health, you know.”

“I know,” you whine around a mouthful of dried oats.  “I just needed five minutes.”

“Well, I’ve got a guy out here who says he’ll only see you.  Doesn’t want Doctor Lee and says he’ll wait as long as it takes.”

A piece of the granola bar lodges in your throat and you cough around it, spluttering while Ko looks on, amused.  She waits for you to collect yourself.

“Is he -- ”

“ -- hot? Yes. Very,” Ko smiles.  

Your cheeks flame with embarrassment at both the observation and the fact that it’s coming from a woman in her sixties.

“I was going to say young,” you grumble, standing and dusting your hands off with a towel.

“That, too.  Come to think of it, I know I’ve seen him here before.  You have some kind of admirer, jagiya?”

You flush.

**************************

“Good evening, Mister Kim.”

You hope the air of nonchalance you affect when you enter the exam room is enough to mask your jitters.  

Your mystery patient looks back at you with those dark eyes and a half-smirk that makes your heart trip in your chest.  You take a steadying breath as you look down at your tablet.

Get it together, girl.

“What brings you in tonight?” you inquire lightly.  “Sword-swallowing accident?  Lose a fist fight with a bear?”

Your mysterious patient chuckles under his breath.  

“Where would you get a couple of outlandish ideas like that, Doc?”

You look up at him just as the teasing smirk on his face becomes a full smile and heat blooms in your chest and face.  You force yourself to tear your gaze away.

“I dislocated my shoulder.  Did you know I work air traffic control at Incheon?”

You shake your head with amused weariness as you make notes on your tablet.

“Crazy night.  One of the planes nearly slid off the runway and I threw my shoulder out trying to get it back on track.”

“Did you save it?”

“Saved it and all 227 people on board.”

“Bravo, Mister Kim.” 

“Just doing my job,” he shrugs.  

You set your tablet down on the exam table with a thump, eyeing him as you reach for a pair of gloves.

“The charge nurse says you asked for me.”

“I did,” he admits.  “You never told me what your favorite kind of milkshake is.”

You cock your head to the side as you look at him.  

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Mister Kim,” you murmur, feigning ignorance. “According to my records this is the first time I’ve ever seen you.”

“Oh, yeah.  Right,” he chuckles.  

“You need some help getting undressed?”

“Yeah,” he admits, slipping one arm out of his leather jacket.  You lean in to help him pull the other side off, compelling yourself to ignore the way he smells like soap and sweat and man when you’re this close.

“It’s strawberry.”

You blurt the words out, anxious to give your brain a task that doesn’t involve analyzing this man’s smell.  Something about the mischievous twist to his mouth tells you he knows you’re flustered by his nearness.  

“I would have guessed chocolate,” he muses, reaching one hand down to grab the hem of his shirt. He drags it up his abdomen and you will your eyes to stay on his face -- refusing to give him any indication that you have more than a clinical interest in what lies underneath.

“Everyone likes chocolate,” you argue, taking over when he can’t get the shirt up any higher.  You push it over his head and carefully work it off his shoulder.  “I don’t want to be like everyone else.”

“Mission accomplished, Doc.”

He gazes at you then -- chest bare and eyes sharp beneath those inky lashes --  and you feel a bolt of awareness run the length of your spine. You pray the heat you suddenly feel all over your body is not manifesting in damning spots of color on your face.  

You remind yourself to get back to work. 

He sucks a breath between his teeth when you press gently against the inflamed muscle and tissue.

“My shoulder’s been shit for years,” he confesses.  “I screwed it up when I was a kid and it hasn’t been the same since.”

“So this happens to you from time to time?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, then I’m going to have to refer you for an MRI,” you say, and he groans when you press into his shoulder again.  “There could be a lot of scar tissue in here, but I won’t be able to know what’s going on until we get some clear scans.”

Your eyes flick back to his.  

Every word that’s ever come out of this man’s mouth is a lie -- but there’s something that feels honest about the way he’s looking at you right now.  Something that makes you feel seasick, unsteady.

“Turn to the side for me,” you say quietly, and the thin paper that lines the exam table rustles as he complies.  The relief you feel when he pivots away from you with those eyes and that look is whole-bodied.  

“For now, the best I can do is probably pop -- “

Your words trail off as your eyes lock on a wound that sits just a few inches from his spine, just above the line of his jeans.  The edges are white and soft with age -- the area long-healed -- but the trauma is unmistakable.  

Textbook.  

The anger you feel as you stare at the wound doesn’t make any sense.  

But you feel it anyway.

“Is it still inside of you, or did they pull it out?”

“What -- ”

“-- The bullet Mister Kim,” you interrupt sharply.  “If it’s still in you, I promise it will come out the second they load you into an MRI machine.  The hard way.”

The muscles of his back flex as he stiffens.  Tension bleeds into the lines of his body and into his voice when he finally speaks.

“It’s out.”

Neither of you says another word.

The room feels hollow now, painfully quiet without talk of elephants or hot air balloons or milkshakes.  The two of you work together silently to crack his abused shoulder back into place.  Somehow he manages to endure that pain without making a sound.

In the end, it’s you that has to speak first.

“That should hold you for now,” you say tightly, standing to toss your gloves in the trash.   You grab your tablet to make notes.

“You mad at me, Doc?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” you mutter, fingers flying over your screen.  “I don’t even know you.”

“Then why does it feel like you’re mad at me?”

You tear your eyes away from the screen to find his.  

There’s no teasing or humor there anymore.  He looks boyish and unsure like this, peering back at you with somber eyes from beneath long black bangs that have fallen into his face.

“No more stories, no more bullshit.  Tell me who you are.”

The words are out of your mouth before you can think better of them -- before you can consider how stupid it is to interrogate a complete stranger with a now confirmed history of violence.  Before you can consider that you have no right to the anger that now streaks white-hot through your veins.

“I can’t,” he breathes quietly.  “I’m sorry.”

You shake your head in disgust.

“Are you dangerous?”

Before he even speaks, you get your answer.  You get it in the way color erupts across the bridge of his nose and cheeks.  The way he looks away from you and down to his hands.

“I guess that depends on who you ask,” he whispers.

“I’m asking you,” you fire back.

He doesn’t answer.

You stand there for what feels like an eternity, waiting for him to say something in his defense. Waiting for him to pull another gag and tell just one more ridiculous story.  But the seconds tick by and he says nothing.

“A nurse is going to come by with a sling. She’ll help you get dressed, too,” you say tightly, walking to the door.

You don’t know why your heart feels like it seizes in your chest when you turn to give him one more look.

“Take care of yourself, Mister Kim,” you say quietly.  “And don’t come back.”

*****************************

Glossary:

Dijeoteu: dessert

Jagiya: sweetie, sweetheart

*****************************

Tag List!

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[forever-rogue]

All Hallows Eve (In Name Only)

A/N: Alright, alright, it’s spooky time in Dorne! This is set in the series universe, but can be read as a standalone. Obviously, it will make a little but more sense in context, but I hope you enjoy either way! This takes place after Oberyn and Sunshine return to Sunspear, but not necessarily at a specific time. I hope you guys like it and have a safe and spooky Halloween!  👻🦇🎃🧟 As always, feedback and comments are welcome, and if you’d like to be tagged, let me know. xx

Pairing: Oberyn Martell x Reader

Word Count: 7k

Warnings: None

IN NAME ONLY SERIES MASTERLIST

MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

 "My love?" your voice carried softly throughout your private quarters as you kept an eye out for Oberyn. Before you could say anything else, he appeared in the room, sporting only a pair of clean trousers, his curls wet from being freshly washed. He offered you his typical dazzling smile before sauntering over you, "oh, my moon and stars! I didn't mean to interrupt."

"My sunshine," he grinned as he wrapped his arms around your waist before pulling you towards him. You leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips, "I was just going to look for you."

"Hmm," you beamed as you nuzzled your nose against his, "and to what do I owe the pleasure of your almost search?"

"Nothing in particular," he promised, his lips lingering over yours as you reached up and played with his damp curls, grinning at the one in particular that always seemed to lighten to a soft gold unlike the rest of his unruly mop, "I missed you."

"You flatter me so, my prince," you teased before pulling away and playfully swatting his chest, "but you've just seen me. I believe we spent the night together, broke our fast together, and then parted ways for the most minute bit of time."

"I still missed you," he insisted as you tossed him a new clean tunic, "for what is this prince without his sunshine?"

“I’m going to assume that this prince can survive but a short time apart from me,” you teased as you walked over to the tall, gilded looking glass, adjusting the beautiful golden necklace that Oberyn had recently gifted you. It ended just perfectly above the swell of your breast, and you hadn’t taken it off since he presented it to you.

“Either way,” he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around waist and silently held you for a few moments. It was such a small, but comforting, gesture and if it was up to you, you’d have stayed in his arms forever. Oberyn pressed a kiss to your neck before whispering against your skin, “to what do I owe the pleasure of your search?”

“I fear it’s nothing terribly important...”

“If it’s important to you, it’s important to me,” he promised, “now go on, tell me.”

“You know what’s coming up in a few weeks, right?” you asked as he met your eyes in the mirror, confusion etched on his face as he tried to figure out what you were talking about. You couldn’t help but laugh at the confusion on his face as you turned to look at him, “really, my prince? Its All Hallows Eve!”

“All Hallows Eve?” he repeated slowly as your eyes widened in surprise, “I’m not quite sure I follow...it’s not much of a big deal is it? It never has been here in Dorne. It’s more stories that have been passed down through generations.”

“Oh my love,” you reached up and grabbed his face, cradling it gently in your hands, “we still have so much to learn from each other, to teach one another...”

“I should be honored to have you teach me more about this apparently important holiday,” he grinned as you nodded before kissing him. He took your hand and led you towards the bed, motioning for you to get in. You eagerly complied as you crawled atop the soft blankets and pillows, laying down on his side as you relished in his scent that always seemed to linger. Oberyn laid down next to you, pulling you into his arms, as you rested your head on his chest, “tell me more.”

“Well, there’s so much to tell. Growing up in the Reach where there are always plentiful and bountiful harvests, we celebrated every autumn. I can remember it even from when I was a little girl,” you remembered particularly how fond your father was of the holiday, always making Honeyholt the center of festivities, “it always signaled the ending of summer - the harvest, and the coming of the new season.”

“Of course,” he agreed, “as is only natural in a place where you have more varied seasons.” 

“Not only that,” you continued, “but a lot of people believed it was when the veil between our world and world of the deceased is the thinnest. People would wear costumes as they celebrated, especially around big bonfires, to scare and ward off the dark spirits and try to honor ancestors that had passed. Doing so was to ensure that winter would be successful and not too harsh.”

“I’ve never heard all of this before,” he admitted as you nodded excitedly, “it sounds like fun.”

“Oh it is,” you agreed, “getting to dress up and have big parties with bonfires? It’s amazing! Now that I’m older, I realize a lot of people just like the festivities because it gave them an excuse to drink copious amounts of honeyed wine and ale...but I still like it. It’s tradition, and it has good roots. Plus, children, ones that would dress up, would go from home to home, bringing some of their harvest to others and exchanging them for things they did not have. A little bit of give and take, but it ensures that no one would go hungry during the harshest of the winter months.”

“Who knew the Lords of the North had hearts after all?” he teased as you snorted with laughter, “while I did not know your father, I know he was a good man. I am not surprised he would take it upon himself to do such things, and you’re just like him, always trying your best to give back.”

“It’s the right thing to do,” you insisted, “we have so much and need so little, while others work so hard and have almost nothing. No deserves that - are not all lives created equal and therefore deserving of such things? It was hardly the position of the other Lords of the Reach to think in such a manner. It was often commoners that keep things alive, which I do believe is very telling. But I always liked it, feeling I was helping with something.”

“You help with more than you know,” he took your hands and brought it to his lips, gently placing a kiss to your knuckles, “never doubt that. You are nothing like them.”

“You flatter me so,” you sighed contently, pressing a kiss to the bit of exposed chest that peeked out from under his tunic, “but I love you either way.”

“And I you,” he promised. You laid there in silence for him time before he spoke up again, “would you like to start a new tradition in Dorne?”

“Hmm?”

“All Hallows Eve,” he stated, “perhaps its time we start celebrating it here as well. We have much to be thankful for, and it would be a good way to make sure everyone is set up with what they need for the coming months...”

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, you sat up straight, looking at him with eager eyes, glittering with excitement. It was enough to bring the biggest of grins to his own face as you placed your legs on either side of his and planted yourself on his waist. 

“Do you mean, my moon and stars?” you asked softly as only nodded in response, his hands finding purchase on your waist, “truly? I-I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want, or have it feel like I’m thrusting this upon you.”

“It would never, and I want to do this,” he promised, as your heart melted at him, “I mean it, if it’s something that’s important and matters to you, then it matters to me as well. Besides, this will be fun, and I think it will be a great opportunity to get to know more of our people. What do you say?” 

“Me?” you asked with a gentle laugh as you leaned down and kissed him, “yes. Yes. Of course it’s a million times yes. Thank you so much, my love. I promise you will not be disappointed. It’s going to be so much fun! We’ll have to have all the girls come, and Ellaria and Quentyn and everyone else!”

“I’m already looking forward to it,” he promised, “we’ll make it welcome to everyone. When Exactly is it?”

“October 31st,” you told him excitedly, your mind already buzzing with all sorts of different ideas, “oh...that’s only a few weeks away. I better get planning!”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” he asked softly as you shook your head, “nothing at all?”

“Nope,” you insisted before leaning down and kissing him deeply, “all you have to do is worry about a costume and leave the rest to me. I..thank you for this, Oberyn. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about how fortunate I am to have you as my husband. I love you.”

“And I love,” he promised gently, pulling you down so you were laying on top of him, “I would do anything for you, sunshine. My sunshine.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

The next few weeks were spent in a rush and a blur as you attempted to plan the biggest and best All Hallows Eve celebration that anyone had ever seen. Luckily, much to your delight, the people of Dorne really wouldn't have much to compare it to, so if it ended up a total disaster at least in your book, no one would know. All they knew were legends and stories of old, but you still wanted to make sure everyone had a good time and was able to get any things they needed for the autumn and winter.

You hadn't experienced this time of year in Dorne yet, and despite the desert-like nature of the region, you were positive the cooler months would bring a similar harshness. You vowed to make sure that no one would be left hunger or forgotten, even if that meant trekking through Dorne with foods and goods yourself.

"A most kind and generous princess," one of the farmers had complimented you as you arranged for him to provide his grain at the big fest. You took his hand and clutched it within yours, thanking him for his kindness and generosity.

"I am no princess sir," you insisted gently, but firmly, "I just want to make sure everyone has what they need."

"But you're married to the prince-"

"Yes, my husband is the Prince," you agreed, "but that does not mean I am just the princess. I am just like everyone else."

"Whatever you say, Princess Martell," he shot you a cheeky wink before heading out with a smile, "I will send you soon the required grain."

"Thank you," you watched him go with a small laugh. Princess Martell. You couldn't deny that you liked the sound of that.

»»————-　♡　————-««

You were humming to yourself as you moved things about the garden, trying to arrange everything perfectly so that the big bonfire would be able to go in the middle of the large courtyard. The big day was coming in a few days, and you were busy finishing up the last minute preparations. You’d gotten help from seemingly everyone in Sunspear to help make sure the celebration would go smoothly and be a memorable one. 

You’d been so busy running around that you hadn’t even had that much time to spend with Oberyn, which he assured was fine a multitude of times. But still, you missed getting to be around him all the time, something you vowed to correct that when this was all over. 

“Hello my love,” almost as if he could hear your thoughts, Oberyn was sauntering towards you, his long arms outstretched as you dropped everything in your hands to rush over to him. He was quick to wrap you up in his arms, and spin you around, pressing soft kisses to the side of your head, “oh, how I’ve missed you, my sweetest girl.”

“And I you, my prince,” you promised as he set you back down, “I thought you were going away with Doran on business today?”

“I was...but then I received the most exciting of news,” he admitted as your eyes grew wide with excitement, “and I thought I had to share them with you.”

“Oh? Pray tell what could have been so important that you’ve left all the duties to Doran?” you teased but quickly stopped as you hear the soft pitter patter of wild footsteps on the warm till of the palace floor. Oberyn’s smile widened as you looked past him to find two little blurs running towards you. It was only a few seconds before you were almost knocked over as two little figures tightly hugged your legs.

You automatically knew who they were and bent to hug onto them tightly as they twittered about excitedly. Once they calmed down you pulled back and ruffled their dark hair before offering each of them a kiss on the top of the leads, “hello my sweet ones! How I’ve missed you both.”

Dorea and Loreza gave you eager grins before taking a moment to hug their father. A warm happiness overtook you as spied Elia and Obella following closely behind, along with Elliara. Deciding not to wait for them, you ran over and wrapped them all up in a tight hug, murmuring about how happy you were to see them again. You were - it felt like your little family was completely again. Now all you needed were his older girls and then you’d be all together again. Just like you knew you were all meant to be.

“I’ve missed you all loads,” you told them softly, “I’m so glad you’re all here, and could join us for this.” 

“We wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Ellaria promised you as she gently touched your cheek, “it’s important that we honor the things you love and hold dear as well. And it’s important to take care of our people.”

“Indeed it is,” you agreed, “we take care of all people, because we are all one and the same.”

“You are wise beyond your years, young one,” she said softly, “you look well - happy.”

“I am,” you promised, stealing a quick peek back over at Oberyn, who currently had one girl in each arm as he showed all the flowers that the two of you had planted. Your little gaze over was not lost on her, “I am very happy. Beyond what I can put into words.”

“Good,” she beamed at you, “you deserve it. Both of you. Now, please tell us how we can help. Whatever we can do, we shall be more than glad to do it.”

“Thank you,” you beamed at her, “but first tell me, what are you all dressing up as?”

“I’m going as the Stranger,” Obella chirped excitedly, “to honor death and those that have died for us.”

“I’m going as Elia,” none other than her current namesake said excitedly, “to honor her, Papa, and our family. I have one of her old dresses that I’m going to wear. Uncle Doran said I looked just like her.”

“I’m sure she’d be very proud to see you in it,” you told her gently, brushing a few of her dark locks out of her face. You’d heard all the stores about Elia, how just, kind, and caring she was. Oberyn hadn’t brought her up much, only a few times in passing, and while you were curious to know more, you didn’t want to pry and disrespect his boundaries. Maybe one day he’d tell you more about her, “you are a great namesake to her, my sweet girl.”

“And we are going to be warriors” Dorea bounded back over to, practically bouncing on her feet in excitement as Loreza nodded in agreement, “warriors fight and keep everyone safe. Just Like Papa!”

“And two wonderful little warriors you will make,” you grinned at them, “I can’t wait to see all of your costumes!”

“And what will you be?” Obella asked excitedly as you shrugged lightly. You’d been so busy trying to throw everything together that you hadn’t given much thought to your own costume. But you were sure that you could throw something together and have it be decent enough.

“I don’t know that,” you admitted, “perhaps I shall go as a star or the moon. I shall have to think about it.”

“Whatever you decide, it will be wonderful,” Ellaria gave your shoulder a squeeze before rounding up her little flock, “now come you four, we have to unpack and then we shall help wherever we are now. But for now, it’s best we stay out of the way.”

“We shall see you at dinner,” you said softly as you took Oberyn’s hand in yours. They all waved you off excitedly as you turned back to your husband, offering him a soft smile, “this was the exciting news?”

“Indeed,” he said fondly as he kissed your knuckles, “I dare hope you are not too disappointed.”

“On the contrary,” you insisted, “I am beyond happy. I’m happy to have you by my side, happy to have them all here...everything.” 

“Good,” he sighed contently, “now, tell me what I can do for you? To help...although I daresay you seem to have handled everything well. The place looks beautiful and everyone is buzzing with excitement. You will put all other festivities to shame, I daresay.”

“I like to think I’ve got some decent organizational skills, maybe one of the few things I’ve gotten from my mother, But I do also have a love of parties and festivals,” you mused, “definitely a trait from my father. But there is one thing you could do for me…”

You brought a hand to his face, touching his cheek before delicately tracing over his nose and jaw before running a handsome through his dark curls. He made a small sound as he closed his eyes and keened into your touch. You leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, lingering against him. 

“Tell me,” he whispered softly, his hands going to your waist, their grip firm, but delicate as ever as he held onto you, “tell me what you want, sunshine, and you shall it.”

“You,” you whispered against his lips, “I want you, Oberyn. I’ve missed you. I need you. Your kisses, your touch - all of you.”

“What a shame,” he smirked against your lips, “it appears my afternoon is already booked up.”

“Oh?’ you raised an eyebrow at him, “and just what could be so occupying of your time?”

“Spending the afternoon with my queen,” he explained as he took your face in his hands before pressing kisses to the apple of your cheeks, “giving her whatever she should desire, however she should desire.”

“And just who would I be to turn down an offer like that?” you asked as you already felt the heat pooling low in your belly, “I am many things, but I am no fool.”

“Then we have no time to waste.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

The evening of All Hallows Eve came faster than you had anticipated, but you were excited to see it come nonetheless. As you were milling about your quarters, slowly attempting to get ready and slip on your costume, you went out onto the balcony. The sun was rapidly setting and the familiar night time glow was setting over Dorne, and you could see bonfires lit everywhere as far as the eye could see. A small smile crossed your lips at the thought that all of that was due to you. You hoped that everyone would enjoy themselves and get what they needed.

"It looks wonderful out there," Oberyn beamed as he found and stood next to you, looking out over his kingdom as he placed a kiss to the side of your head, "you've done a wonderful job, my love. Everyone is buzzing with excitement and I've heard nothing but good things, and have already seen some costumes roaming about the halls."

"I'm sure they'll all be just grand," you agreed as you turned to go back inside, "and just what are you going to be, my love? You haven't told me yet."

"I am going to be the sun, of course," he said as though it was the most obvious thing. You made a small sound of amusement as you found clothes of brilliant, bright gold laid on the bed. You told a hand over, admiring how soft and delicate they were before turning back to him, "would golden glitter everywhere be too much?"

"Not enough I think," you snorted as you spied the golden paint and glitter on the bureau. He was going to be a sight to be marveled at, "it suits you, you know."

"What does?"

"The gold," you took some of the paint and dipped your fingertips in, turning around and swiping some of it on his bare shoulder, "the sun. Everything. You spread sunshine everywhere you go."

"I believe that is better suited for you," he chuckled as he grabbed his costume, "perhaps I should have let you be the sun. Just what have you decided to go as? I'm afraid you've been just as secretive."

"Well, I'm terribly afraid it's nothing exciting so do not get your hopes up," you shrugged as you flaunted over to the wardrobe. You looked over your shoulder to make sure he watched you before unlocking it and slowly pulling out a stunning gown of pale yellow, draped and framed with glittering and dazzling beads and jewels. The skirt was thick and full with silver tulle and lace giving it an almost ethereal appearance, "what do you think?"

"Its beautiful," he agreed, the corners of his mouth slowly turning up into a smile, "and will look even more beautiful once worn by you. The moon? A very smart choice. Though perhaps we would have been more apt to switch costumes."

"I disagree, my moon and stars," you took the gown and walked over to him, kissing the tip of his nose, "I think we have made very good choices. Apparently we are very much on the same page."

"It is true that the sun and moon need each other," he insisted and he helped to strip off your garments, letting them hit the floor before placing kisses on your bare shoulders and collarbones, "one cannot exist without the other."

"A true poet," you praised as you stepped into the gown, letting him help to pull it up and tie it into the back, "although it is true. I do not know what I would be without you, my love."

"Quite fine I am sure," he insisted as he grabbed your jewels from their place in the bedside table. The sun bracelet was placed delicately around your wrist, followed by the necklace that Oberyn had made for you, "I believe it is I that would be far worse off."

"You are a fool of a man if you believe that," you chided softly before pausing to kiss him properly, "but I adore you beyond measure regardless. Now, on with your costume so we can get going. Otherwise people will think we've decided to bunk off."

"Normally you try to get my garments off, not on," he teased as he started to slip his own items on. You'd gone back to the looking glass to adorn yourself with the headpiece you'd had prepared, not unlike a crown, and put some make up onto your features. Oberyn caught your eye and shot you a cheeky wink, "but I suppose that can wait for later."

"I'm afraid it will have to wait, my prince," you agreed, feeling warmth flush all over your face, "besides, I am almost ready and you still need to paint yourself."

"Help me?" he asked innocently as you slowly nodded.

"Of course," you painted your lips in a frosted pale gold before rejoining him, pushing him slowly back on the bed, "what made you choose the sun?"

"The sun brings life, new things, prosperity," he said as you took the golden glitter and brought it down his arms and shoulders, "we cannot survive without the sun. And with it, it brings hope and happiness. I figured it was a good way to honor the ancestors and to ask for a bountiful winter."

"Very good indeed," you agreed, taking some of the excessive glitter and running it through the curls you loved you loved so much, "and gold? It suits you perfectly, although I fear we might have glitter everywhere for some time. But then again, there are worse things in life."

"Indeed there are," he agreed, "besides, I quite like the thought of you covered solely in glitter."

"You just like the idea of me, I'm starting to see," you teased as you brought the paint down the expanse of the exposed parts of his chest.

"What is there not to want?" he insisted as you just laughed, "what made you choose the moon?"

"Well, the moon signals the passage of another day and ushering in of a new one - life, rebirth, a new day," you explained, "I figured it was a good way to bring in a new season and say goodbye to the old."

"How very fitting," he responded as he pulled you into his lap, causing you to giggle wildly, "this is brilliant, all of it."

"I like to think so too," you agreed, making it a point not to touch the last bits of still drying painting on his body, "now be careful, or we'll both be covered in golden glitter!"

"I think it suits you too," he took some of the leftover paint, more glitter by now than pigment or anything else and swiped across the apples of your cheeks and tip of your nose, "a golden beauty. Just as a Martell should be."

"Hmm," you hummed in delight as you slowly climbed off of his lap, "Indeed. And now, we are set and should get going. Otherwise we will be late."

"Fashionably late," he suggested as he went to grab both of your shoes, "but then again, a prince is never late, even else is simply early."

"Well, I do not happen to be a prince, so I do not get that excuse," you pulled on your sandals, "so I prefer to be on time."

"Ahh, but you are my wife," he reminded you,"therefore whatever rules apply to me, apply to you. But then again, if we are already on the verge of being late, perhaps we could just remain absent..."

"Your ploys to keep me in bed will not work," you jokingly scolded with a smile, "besides, we will have plenty of time for that tomorrow. Tomorrow is a day of rest." 

"Only if you promise," he offered you his hand after straightening his belt. You took his hand with a nod before pressing a kiss to his cheek, "now shall we grace them with our presence?"

"Indeed we shall, my prince."

»»————-　♡　————-««

"Wow," Oberyn's eyes lit up as he looked around the large courtyard. There was a large bonfire in the center, and carved pumpkins scattered around, illuminated everything in a beautifully haunting way. People were already filing in, chatting and laughing merrily as they ate and drank. Luckily, most people seemed to have come in costume, "you did all of this."

"I mean I had a lot of help," you said as he took your hand in his, lacing your fingers together, "I couldn't have done it without everyone else's help. It was a collective effort, truly."

"Either way," he beamed at you, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, "this is wonderful. I like the lanterns too, are they all done by hand?"

"Yes," you grinned, taking him over to one you'd carved that very morning. It was a simple little thing, caringly made with a smile and eyes, "the girls have been helping me. They've been so great, and it was fun for all of us. We just cut the tops off and scoop out the innards and then carve into faces, and then the candle goes inside. Its supposed to ward off evil spirits."

"Very cute," he said as he studied intently, his thumb stroking the back of your hand.

"And dual purpose," you said excitedly, "the insides were used to make pies and the seeds were saved to plant a new crop come spring."

"Look at you," he shook his amusement, "always thinking about everything. One of the many things I love about you."

"You're just enchanted by the magic of the evening," you insisted, feeling flustered by his compliment all while relishing into it, "what I've done is nothing special."

"But it is," he promised, waving at the some of the townspeople that had shown up and were eagerly calling out your names, "you've brought a whole new tradition to Dorne."

"Dorne is my home now," you reminded him, "and it is also an honor for me to have everyone embrace it so."

"They love you," he insisted as a few people you passed by stared at your gilded gown in awe, "you're their princess now."

"I should hardly think so," you said shyly as you spotted Ellaria and her girls, who waved excitedly at the two of you, "I'm just here, still the same me as always. I do however have a wonderful and large family now, which I believe is far more than I deserve."

"You deserve the world," he promised as the girls ran over to you. They eagerly hugged you both before twirling around and showing you their costumes.

"Very beautiful," you promised each of them, feeling an almost overwhelmed sense of pride and love in how much effort they put into everything. They really were so much more supportive than you have ever dreamed. Family. They were family, "I hope you all have lots of fun this evening!"

"We've already gotten lots of sweets and cakes," Dorea grinned excitedly as Loreza nodded, "but don't tell Mama."

"Its between us," you winked at her as Obella rolled her eyes dramatically.

"Mama knows," she insisted as Ellaria came over, "and at this rate, we'll never be allowed sweets again."

"I can be more forgiving than you think," she promised her girls with a laugh, "now go and take some sweets and share them with others. Make sure everyone gets some."

"Yes Mama," they echoed as the older two took their younger sister's hands and they walked off to help pass out treats.

"You two look stunning as ever," she grinned as your face flushed with warmth, "the sun and the moon. How very fitting."

"And to think, we didn't even know what the other was planning," Oberyn's arm wrapped your waist as he gave her arm a squeeze, "thank you for coming."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," she insisted, "this will be a wonderful tradition to start in Dorne. But let me not occupy you any longer, I'm sure everyone is eager for a glimpse of the pair of you."

"We shall see you soon," he promised as you nodded. You were so thankful for her presence; she had a way of making you feel warm and cared for. It was a far cry from how you had felt in the beginning after your first meeting.

As you continued your jaunt about the courtyard and gardens, you pointed out everything to him and explained the significance and meaning behind the traditions and symbolism. He was enraptured, almost as if by magic, as he listened to you speak. There was something about you that always made him feel so calm and at peace, as though his heart and slow were at home.

At one point you spotted his older girls, all decked out like their younger sisters, helping out and getting boxes of goods that would hold for the winter to take those who needed them. Kindness, you decided, was definitely a Martell trait, and you hoped that none of them, or whatever possible future children of sorts you had, would ever lose that spark.

You had mentioned to him, more in passing than anything else that you had often gone around Honeyholt, passing around pies and treats to families nearby. A part of you knew that he would remember, but you hadn't expected him to want to commit to such a thing.

"What do you think?" he asked with a gentle in the direction of a full cart near the entrance to the kitchens. You looked back at him with wide, gleaming eyes, as you eagerly nodded.

"Seriously?" you asked as you grabbed his hand, holding it tightly between your own, "Oberyn, I would love to. It will be so nice to give a little something back."

"Then we shall do it," he promised, "come on, sweetest of honeys."

And that's you ended up with Oberyn at your side, each of you using one hand to pull a full cart of goods, your others hands entwined together in the middle. It was, like so many other things with Oberyn, utterly wonderful and despite being a somewhat monotonous task was fun.

You told him about your childhood in Honeyholt and your favorite holiday traditions, and he told him yours. He was such a naughty child, a smart, bold little thing from the start. Knowing how smart and mischievous Dorea and Loreza were, you had no doubt that they were the spitting image of a young Oberyn. 

"Would you like to do the honors?" he asked as you stopped at the first row of houses nearing the outskirts of the village. You took a load of pies and other goods in your arms and nodded, letting him help you to the door, knocking on it gently. It was a few moments before the door always opened. A young man stuck his head as he looked at the two of you suspiciously. It was only a moment before he realized who you were, after looking Oberyn up and down. 

"Oh! I-I apologize," he opened the door and gave you each a look of awe, "your highness, Lady Martell! I didn't..."

"It is okay," you insisted with a big smile, "its All Hallows Eve today. We've come to bring you some treats and goods to usher in the new season!"

"For us?" he took the items from your hands as you beamed at him, "h-how could we ever thank you-"

"There's absolutely nothing to thank us for," Oberyn insisted as the young man appeared to be close to tears. While the Martells reigned over Dorne with a kind, gentle manner, this was still more than anyone expected.

"From our family to yours," you agreed, "and if you ever need anything, our home and help is open and extended to you."

"Thank you," he said as he shook each of your hands in turn, "thank you so much. I appreciate this more than words could express."

From there, the two of you went from house to house, giving people things from your cart until there was nothing felt. Others from your household were doing the same thing, all of you going to different parts of Sunspear. You'd asked the other noble families in the various parts of Dorne to do the same, hoping they would listen and follow your lead.

By the time you finished, it was late, later than you had thought, and you were worn out. Worn out, but happy and glad to have brought All Hallows Eve to Dorne. 

When you returned to the palace, the fires were still burning bright, and people were milling about and having fun. The costumes you had seen were all wonderful, and you'd gotten to hear so many stories about people's family members that had passed away. 

"Your father would be proud," Oberyn promised quietly as you sat near one of the bonfires, "he'd be so proud of the woman you are."

"Thank you," you turned to him with soft eyes, "he was...always my biggest supporter. I miss him, terribly sometimes, but its not as bad anymore."

"Why's that?" he asked as you leaned over to him, putting your hand gently on his cheeks as you stroked his soft skin.

"Because of you," you whispered softly, “and your, our, family. You love me, and have given me so much more love and kindness than I could ever dream of. You are my heart, my sweet prince."

"It is not common for me to be at a loss for words," he said softly, "and yet you continually leave me stunned."

"Its because you love me," you grinned with a kiss to the tip of his nose, laughing when some of the golden glitter got on your face, "and you are a silly fool when it comes to love."

"Neither of those are lies," he insisted, "I am a most weak hearted fool for my wife."

You hummed in content as you rested your head on his shoulder, looking into the fire as a sense of tiredness overwhelmed you. But at the same time, you had a question on your mind that you'd been curious about for some time. You figured now would be the perfect time to ask him, "Oberyn?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"Your sister, Elia, what was she like?" you asked softly, "I...I'm sorry if that's out of turn, but I'm just curious. I've heard so many wonderful things about her...I would have loved to meet her."

"Its okay," he promised as you relaxed slightly, "she would have loved you and you would have loved her. She was the youngest out of the three of us. Every bit the opposite of me, she was fearless and kind, always going into everything with passion and open heart. She never made anyone feel inferior, she made everyone feel welcome and loved. She always wanted the best for her people, her husband, her children...she was one of the many people that met a cruel and wicked fate she did not deserve, nor her children. I've always...wanted to avenge her. I've come close, but luckily, I stopped before it was too late."

"In King's Landing...before the Purple Wedding..." you finished for him as you felt him nod. If even one decision had been made differently, you would not be sitting next to him, or calling him your husband, "whatever happened, I'm glad nothing happened to you."

"Ellaria was able to talk some sense into me," he admitted as you turned your head and kissed him, "as always."

"She is one of the smartest women for a reason," you agreed, "and one of the strongest if she was able to get you to see reason!"

"You wound me so," he laughed.

"You are stubborn, but I love you," you sighed as you took his hand and held it tightly in yours, "tonight we honor and celebrate her life and my father's. And those others who had left our worldly realm."

"Yes," he agreed, feeling himself get choked up, "to Elia and Haymitch."

"But you're wrong, you know," you said as you slowly stood up and reached for his hands.

"How so?"

"You're not the opposite of Elia," you insisted, "you're quite like her actually. Kind, brave, smart, loyal, handsome. You may not see it in yourself, my prince, but it is true."

"Have I told you that I love you?" he asked as he pulled you into his arms.

"I think so," you grinned at him, "but I'm not opposed to hearing it again."

"I shall repeat it until my dying breath - I love you."

"And I you," you played gently with some of the curls at the nape of his neck, "shall we retire for the evening, my love?"

»»————-　♡　————-««

"Help me?" you asked as you took off your jewelry and stood in front of the mirror. Oberyn was already stripped down to his britches, his skin still painted with golden glitter. He came up behind you, his hands going to your waist as he took the delicate circlet from the crown of your head, setting it down along with your necklace and bracelet. He kissed along your shoulder before burying his face into your neck, "Oberyn! I meant help me take this dress off!"

"I know," he grinned as he started to undo the back of your dress. He moved with deliberate slowness, making sure to touch every inch of your skin as it became bared to him, "is it horrible of me to say you look gorgeous in this dress, and even better without it?"

"Not at all, my prince," you grinned as the heavy fabric pooled at your feet, leaving in your simple undergarments. You turned to face him, wrapping your arms around his neck as you held him close. He kissed you gently as he slowly moved to finish undressing you, "you're going to cover me with glitter and gold!"

"You say it as though this is a bad thing," he teased as you moved to finish undressing him, "but if you want me to stop, I will gladly oblige you."

"Don't stop," you whispered against his lips, "make me as golden as you."

"You are already so golden, my love," he promised softly as he wrapped his arms tightly around you. It was such a tender, intimate act that it was enough to make you feel so safe and warm and at peace, "thank you for this."

"For this evening, bringing us a wonderful new tradition," he whispered, "for everything, my sunshine. I love you more than you could ever know."

"And I love you, my prince," you promised him, pressing kisses all over his face, "now I implore you to take me to bed and make me yours."

"Anything for you, my queen."

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[grigori77]

2020 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 3)

10.  WOLFWALKERS – eleven years ago, Irish director Tomm Moore exploded onto the animated cinema scene with The Secret of Kells, a spellbinding feature debut which captivated audiences the world over and even garnered an Oscar nomination.  Admittedly I didn’t actually even know about it until I discovered his work through his astonishing follow-up, Song of the Sea (another Academy Award nominee), in 2015, so when I finally caught it I was already a fan of Moore’s work.  It’s been a similarly long wait for his third feature, but he’s genuinely pulled off a hat-trick, delivering a third flawless film in a row which OF COURSE means that his latest feature is, beyond a shadow of a doubt, my top animated feature of 2020.  I could even be tempted to say it’s his best work to date … this is an ASTONISHING film, a work of such breath-taking, spell-binding beauty that I spent its entire hour and three-quarters glued to the screen, simple mesmerised by the wonder and majesty of this latest iteration of the characteristically stylised “Cartoon Saloon” look.  It’s also liberally steeped in Moore’s trademark Celtic vibe and atmosphere, once again delving deep into his homeland’s rich and evocative cultural history and mythology while also bringing us something far more original and personal – this time the titular supernatural beings are magical near-human beings whose own subconscious can assume the form of very real wolves.  Set in a particularly dark time in Irish history – namely 1650, when Oliver Cromwell was Lord Protector – the story follows Robyn (Honor Kneafsey, probably best known for the Christmas Prince films), the impetuous and spirited young daughter of English hunter Bill Goodfellowe (Sean Bean), brought in by the Protectorate to rid the city of Kilkenny of the wolves plaguing the area.  One day fate intervenes and Robyn meets Mebh Og MacTire (The Girl at the End of the Garden‘s Eve Whittaker), a wild girl living in the woods, whose accidental bite gives her strange dreams in which she becomes a wolf – turns out Mebh is a wolfwalker, and now so is Robyn … every aspect of this film is an utter triumph for Moore and co, who have crafted a work of living, breathing cinematic art that’s easily the equal to (if not even better than) the best that Disney, Dreamworks or any of the other animation studios could create.  Then there’s the excellent voice cast – Bean brings fatherly warmth and compassion to the role that belies his character’s intimidating size, while Kneafsey and Whittaker make for a sweet and sassy pair as they bond in spite of powerful cultural differences, and the masterful Simon McBurney (Harry Potter, Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy) brings cool, understated menace to the role of Cromwell himself.  This is a film with plenty of emotional heft to go with its marvels, and once again displays the welcome dark side which added particular spice to Moore’s previous films, but ultimately this is still a gentle and heartfelt work of wonder that makes for equally suitable viewing for children as for those who are still kids at heart – ultimately, then, this is another triumph for one of the most singularly original filmmakers working in animation today, and if Wolfwalkers doesn’t make it third time lucky come Oscars-time then there’s no justice in the world …

9.  WONDER WOMAN 1984 – probably the biggest change for 2020 compared to pretty much all of the past decade is how different the fortunes of superhero cinema turned out to be.  A year earlier the Marvel Cinematic Universe had dominated all, but the DC Extended Universe still got a good hit in with big surprise hit Shazam!  Fast-forward to now and things are VERY different – DC suddenly came out in the lead, but only because Marvel’s intended heavy-hitters (two MCU movies, the first Venom sequel and potential hot-shit new franchise starter Morbius: the Living Vampire) found themselves continuously pushed back thanks to (back then) unforeseen circumstances which continue to shit all over our theatre-going slate for the immediate future.  In the end DC’s only SERIOUS competition turned out to be NETFLIX … never mind, at least we got ONE big established superhero blockbuster into the cinemas before the end of the year that the whole family could enjoy, and who better to headline it than DC’s “newest” big screen megastar, Diana Prince? Back in 2017 Monster’s Ball director Patty Jenkins’ monumental DCEU standalone spectacularly realigned the trajectory of a cinematic franchise that was visibly flagging, redesigning the template for the series’ future which has since led to some (mostly) consistently impressive subsequent offerings.  Needless to say it was a damn tough act to follow, but Jenkins and co-writers Geoff Johns (Arrow and The Flash) and David Callaham (The Expendables, Zombieland: Double Tap, future MCU entry Shang-Chi & the Legend of the Ten Rings) have risen to the challenge in fine style, delivering something which pretty much equals that spectacular franchise debut … as has Gal Gadot, who’s now OFFICIALLY made the role her own thanks to yet another showstopping and definitive performance as the unstoppable Amazonian goddess living amongst us.  She’s older and wiser than in the first film, but still hasn’t lost that forthright honesty and wonderfully pure heart we’ve come to love ever since her introduction in Zack Snyder’s troublesome but ultimately underrated Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (yes, that’s right, I said it!), and Gadot’s clear, overwhelming commitment to the role continues to pay off magnificently as she once again proves that Diana is THE VERY BEST superhero in the DCEU cinematic pantheon.  Although it takes place several decades after its predecessor, WW84 is, obviously, still very much a period piece, Jenkins and co this time perfectly capturing the sheer opulent and over-the-top tastelessness of the 1980s in all its big-haired, bad-suited, oversized shoulder-padded glory while telling a story that encapsulates the greedy excessiveness of the Reagan era, perfectly embodied in the film’s nominal villain, Max Lord (The Mandalorian himself, Pedro Pascal), a wishy-washy wannabe oil tycoon conman who chances upon a supercharged wish-rock and unleashes a devastating supernatural “monkey’s paw” upon the world. To say any more would give away a whole raft of spectacular twists and turns that deserve to be enjoyed good and cold, although they did spoil one major surprise in the trailer when they teased the return of Diana’s first love, Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) … needless to say this is another big blockbuster bursting with big characters, big action and BIG IDEAS, just what we’ve come to expect after Wonder Woman’s first triumphant big screen adventure.  Interestingly, the film starts out feeling like it’s going to be a bubbly, light, frothy affair – after a particularly stunning all-action opening flashback to Diana’s childhood on Themyscira, the film proper kicks off with a bright and breezy atmosphere that feels a bit like the kind of Saturday morning cartoon action the consistently impressive set-pieces take such unfettered joy in parodying, but as the stakes are raised the tone grows darker and more emotionally potent, the storm clouds gathering for a spectacularly epic climax that, for once, doesn’t feel too overblown or weighed down by its visual effects, while the intelligent script has unfathomable hidden depths to it, making us think far more than these kinds of blockbusters usually do.  It’s really great to see Chris Pine return since he was one of the best things about the first movie, and his lovably childlike wide-eyed wonder at this brave new world perfectly echoes Diana’s own last time round; Kristen Wiig, meanwhile, is pretty phenomenal throughout as Dr Barbara Minerva, the initially geeky and timid nerd who discovers an impressive inner strength but ultimately turns into a superpowered apex predator as she becomes one of Wonder Woman’s most infamous foes, the Cheetah; Pascal, of course, is clearly having the time of his life hamming it up to the hilt as Lord, playing gloriously against his effortlessly cool, charismatic action hero image to deliver a compellingly troubling examination of the monstrous corrupting influence of absolute power.  Once again, though, the film truly belongs to Gadot – she looks amazing, acts her socks off magnificently, and totally rules the movie.  After this, a second sequel is a no-brainer, because Wonder Woman remains the one DC superhero who’s truly capable of bearing the weight of this particular cinematic franchise on her powerful shoulders – needless to say, it’s already been greenlit, and with both Jenkins and Gadot onboard, I’m happy to sign up for more too …

8.  LOVE & MONSTERS – with the cinemas continuing their frustrating habit of opening for a little while and then closing while the pandemic ebbed and flowed in the months after the summer season, it was starting to look like there might not have been ANY big budget blockbusters to enjoy before year’s end as heavyweights like Black Widow, No Time To Die and Dune pulled back to potentially more certain release slots into 2021 (with only WW84 remaining stubbornly in place for Christmas).  Then Paramount decided to throw us a bone, opting to release this post-apocalyptic horror comedy on-demand in October instead, thus giving me the perfect little present to tie me over during the darkening days of autumn. The end result was a stone-cold gem that came out of nowhere to completely blow critics away, a spectacular sleeper hit that ultimately proved one of the year’s biggest and most brilliant surprises.  Director Michael Matthews may only have had South African indie thriller Five Fingers for Marseilles under his belt prior to this, but he proves he’s definitely a solid talent to watch in the future, crafting a fun and effective thrill-ride that, like all the best horror comedies, is consistently as funny as it is scary, sharing much of the same DNA as this particular mash-up genre’s classics like Tremors and Zombieland and standing up impressively well to such comparisons.  The story, penned by rising star Brian Duffield (who has TWO other entries on this list, Underwater and Spontaneous) and Matthew Robinson (The Invention of Lying, Dora & the Lost City of Gold), is also pretty ingenious and surprisingly original – a meteorite strike has unleashed weird mutagenic pathogens that warp various creepy crawly critters into gigantic monstrosities that have slaughter most of the world’s human population, leaving only a beleaguered, dwindling few to eke out a precarious living in underground colonies. Living in one such makeshift community is Joel Dawson (The Maze Runner’s Dylan O’Brien), a smart and likeable geek who really isn’t very adventurous, is extremely awkward and uncoordinated, and has a problem with freezing if threatened … which makes it all the more inexplicable when he decides, entirely against the advice of everyone he knows, to venture onto the surface so he can make the incredibly dangerous week-long trek to the neighbouring colony where his girlfriend Aimee (Iron Fist’s Jessica Henwick) has ended up.  Joel is, without a doubt, the best role that O’Brien has EVER had, a total dork who’s completely unsuited to this kind of adventure and, in the real world, sure to be eaten alive in the first five minutes, but he’s also such a fantastically believable, fallible everyman that every one of us desperate, pathetic omega-males and females can instantly put ourselves in his place, making it elementarily easy to root for him.  He’s also hilariously funny, his winningly self-deprecating sass and pitch perfect talent for physical comedy making it all the more rewarding watching each gloriously anarchic life-and-death encounter mould him into the year’s most unlikely action hero.  Henwick, meanwhile, once again impresses in a well-written role where she’s able to make a big impression despite her decidedly short screen time, as do the legendary Michael Rooker and brilliant newcomer Ariana Greenblatt as Clyde and Minnow, the adorably jaded, seen-it-all-before pair of “professional survivors” Joel meets en-route, who teach him to survive on the surface.  The action is fast, frenetic and potently visceral, the impressively realistic digital creature effects bringing a motley crew of bloodthirsty beasties to suitably blood-curdling life for the film’s consistently terrifying set-pieces, while the world-building is intricately thought-out and skilfully executed.  Altogether, this was an absolute joy from start to finish, and a film I enthusiastically endorsed to everyone I knew was looking for something fun to enjoy during the frustrating lockdown nights-in.  One of the cinematic year’s best kept secrets then, and a compelling sign of things to come for its up-and-coming director.

7.  PARASITE – I’ve been a fan of master Korean filmmaker Bong Joon-ho ever since I stumbled across his deeply weird but also thoroughly brilliant breakthrough feature The Host, and it’s a love that’s deepened since thanks to truly magnificent sci-fi actioner Snowpiercer, so I was looking forward to his latest feature as much as any movie geek, but even I wasn’t prepared for just what a runaway juggernaut of a hit this one turned out to be, from the insane box office to all that award-season glory (especially that undeniable clean-sweep at the Oscars). I’ll just come out and say it, this film deserves it all.  It’s EASILY Bong’s best film to date (which is really saying something), a masterful social satire and jet black comedy that raises some genuinely intriguing questions before delivering deeply troubling answers.  Straddling the ever-widening gulf between a disaffected idle rich upper class and impoverished, struggling lower class in modern-day Seoul, it tells the story of the Kim family – father Ki-taek (Bong’s good luck charm, Song Kang-ho), mother Chung-sook (Jang Hye-jin), son Ki-woo (Train to Busan’s Choi Woo-shik) and daughter Ki-jung (The Silenced’s Park So-dam) – a poor family living in a run-down basement apartment who live hand-to-mouth in minimum wage jobs and can barely rub two pennies together, until they’re presented with an intriguing opportunity.  Through happy chance, Ki-woon is hired as an English tutor for Park Da-hye (Jung Ji-so), the daughter of a wealthy family, which offers him the chance to recommend Ki-jung as an art tutor to the Parks’ troubled young son, Da-song (Jung Hyeon-jun). Soon the rest of the Kims are getting in on the act, the kids contriving opportunities for their father to replace Mr Park’s chauffeur and their mother to oust the family’s long-serving housekeeper, Gook Moon-gwang (Lee Jung-eun), and before long their situation has improved dramatically.  But as they two families become more deeply entwined, cracks begin to show in their supposed blissful harmony as the natural prejudices of their respective classes start to take hold, and as events spiral out of control a terrible confrontation looms on the horizon.  This is social commentary at its most scathing, Bong drawing on personal experiences from his youth to inform the razor-sharp script (co-written by his production assistant Han Jin-won), while he weaves a palpable atmosphere of knife-edged tension throughout to add spice to the perfectly observed dark humour of the situation, all the while throwing intriguing twists and turns at us before suddenly dropping such a massive jaw-dropper of a gear-change that the film completely turns on its head to stunning effect.  The cast are all thoroughly astounding, Song once again dominating the film with a turn at once sloppy and dishevelled but also poignant and heartfelt, while there are particularly noteworthy turns from Lee Sun-kyun as the Parks’ self-absorbed patriarch Dong-ik and Choi Yeo-jeong (The Concubine) as his flighty, easily-led wife Choi Yeon-gyo, as well as a fantastically weird appearance in the latter half from Park Myung-hoon.  This is heady stuff, dangerously seductive even as it becomes increasingly uncomfortable viewing, so that even as the screws tighten and everything goes to hell it’s simply impossible to look away.  Bong Joon-ho really has surpassed himself this time, delivering an existential mind-scrambler that lingers long after the credits have rolled and might even have you questioning your place in society once you’ve thought about it some. It deserves every single award and every ounce of praise it’s been lavished with, and looks set to go down as one of the true cinematic greats of this new decade.  Trust me, if this was a purely critical best-of list it’d be RIGHT AT THE TOP …

6.  THE OLD GUARD – Netflix’ undisputable TOP OFFERING of the summer came damn close to bagging the whole season, and I can’t help thinking that even if some of the stiffer competition had still been present it may well have still finished this high. Gina Prince-Blythewood (Love & Basketball, the Secret Life of Bees) directs comics legend Greg Rucka’s adaptation of his own popular series with uncanny skill and laser-focused visual flair considering there’s nothing on her previous CV to suggest she’d be THIS good at mounting a stomping great ultraviolent action thriller, ushering in a thoroughly engrossing tale of four ancient, invulnerable immortal warriors – Andy AKA Andromache of Scythia (Charlize Theron), Booker AKA Sebastian de Livre (Matthias Schoenaerts), Joe AKA Yusuf Al-Kaysani (Wolf’s Marwan Kenzari) and Nicky AKA Niccolo di Ginova (Trust’s Luca Marinelli) – who’ve been around forever, hiring out their services as mercenaries for righteous causes while jealously guarding their identities for fear of horrific experimentation and exploitation should their true natures ever be discovered.  Their anonymity is threatened, however, when they’re uncovered by former CIA operative James Copley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who’s working for the decidedly dodgy pharmaceutical conglomerate run by sociopathic billionaire Steven Merrick (Harry Melling, formerly Dudley in the Harry Potter movies), who want to capture these immortals so they can patent whatever it is that makes them keep on ticking … just as a fifth immortal, US Marine Nile Freeman (If Beale Street Could Talk’s KiKi Layne), awakens after being “killed” on deployment in Afghanistan.  The supporting players are excellent, particularly Ejiofor, smart and driven but ultimately principled and deeply conflicted about what he’s doing, even if he does have the best of intentions, and Melling, the kind of loathsome, reptilian scumbag you just love to hate, but the film REALLY DOES belong to the Old Guard themselves – Schoenaerts is a master brooder, spot-on casting as the group’s relative newcomer, only immortal since the Napoleonic Wars but clearly one seriously old soul who’s already VERY tired of the lifestyle, while Joe and Nicky (who met on opposing sides of the Crusades) are simply ADORABLE, an unapologetically matter-of-fact gay couple who are sweet, sassy and incredibly kind, the absolute emotional heart of the film; it’s the ladies, however, that are most memorable here.  Layne is exceptional, investing Nile with a steely intensity that puts her in good stead as her new existence threatens to overwhelm her and MORE THAN qualified to bust heads alongside her elders … but it’s ancient Greek warrior Andy who steals the film, Theron building on the astounding work she did in Atomic Blonde to prove, once and for all, that there’s no woman on Earth who looks better kicking arse than her (as Booker puts it, “that woman has forgotten more ways to kill than entire armies will ever learn”); in her hands, Andy truly is a goddess of death, tough as tungsten alloy and unflappable even in the face of hell itself, but underneath it all she hides a heart as big as any of her friends’.  They’re an impossibly lovable bunch and you feel you could follow them on another TEN adventures like this one, which is just as well, because Prince-Blythewood and Rucka certainly put them through their paces here – the drama is high (but frequently laced with a gentle, knowing sense of humour, particularly whenever Joe and Nicky are onscreen), as are the stakes, and the frequent action sequences are top-notch, executed with rare skill and bone-crunching zest, but also ALWAYS in service to the story.  Altogether this is an astounding film, a genuine victory for its makers and, it seems, for Netflix themselves – it’s become one of the platform’s biggest hits to date, earning well-deserved critical acclaim and great respect and genuine geek love from the fanbase at large.  After this, a sequel is not only inevitable, it’s ESSENTIAL …

5.  MANK – it’s always nice when David Fincher, one of my TOP FIVE ALL TIME FAVOURITE DIRECTORS, drops a new movie, because it can be GUARANTEED to place good and high in my rundown for that year.  The man is a frickin’ GENIUS, a true master of the craft, genuinely one of the auteur’s auteurs.  I’ve NEVER seen him deliver a bad film – even a misfiring Fincher (see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button or Alien 3) is still capable of creating GREAT CINEMA.  How? Why?  It’s because he genuinely LOVES the art form, it’s been his obsession all his life, and he’s spent every day of it becoming the best possible filmmaker he can be.  Who better to tell the story of the creation of one of the ULTIMATE cinematic masterpieces, then?  Benjamin Ross’ acclaimed biopic RKO 281 covered similar ground, presenting a compelling look into the making Citizen Kane, the timeless masterpiece of Hollywood’s ULTIMATE auteur, Orson Welles, but Fincher’s film is more interested in the original inspiration for the story, how it was written and, most importantly, the man who wrote it – Herman J. Mankiewicz, known to his friends as Mank. One of my favourite actors of all time, Gary Oldman, delivers yet another of his career best performances in the lead role, once a man of vision and incredible storytelling skill whose talents have largely been squandered through professional difficulties and personal vices, a burned out one-time great fallen on hard times whom Welles picks up out of the trash, dusts off and offers a chance to create something truly great again.  The only catch?  The subject of their film (albeit dressed up in the guise of fictional newspaper magnate Charles Foster Kane) is to be real-life publisher, politico and tycoon William Randolph Hurst (Charles Dance), once Mank’s friend and patron before they had a very public and messy falling out which partly led to his current circumstances.  As he toils away in seclusion on what is destined to become his true masterwork, flashbacks reveal to us the fascinating, moving and ultimately tragic tale of his rise and fall from grace in the movie business, set against the backdrop of one of the most tumultuous periods in American history.  Shooting a script that his own journalist and screenwriter father, Jack, crafted and then failed to bring to the screen himself before his death in 2003, Fincher has been working for almost a quarter century to make this film, and all that passion and drive is writ large on the screen – this is a glorious film ABOUT film, the art of it, the creation of it, and all the dirty little secrets of what the industry itself has always really been like, especially in that most glamorous and illusory of times.  The fact that Fincher shot in black and white and intentionally made it look like it was made in the early 1940s (the “golden age of the Silver Screen”, if you will) may seem like a gimmick, but instead it’s a very shrewd choice that expertly captures the gloss and moodiness of the age, almost looking like a contemporary companion piece to Kane itself, and it’s the perfect way to frame all the sharp-witted observation, subtly subversive character development and murky behind-the-scenes machinations that tell the story.  Oldman is in every way the star here, holding the screen with all the consummate skill and flair we’ve come to expect from him, but there’s no denying the uniformly excellent supporting cast are equal to the task here – Dance is at his regal, charismatic best as Hearst, while Amanda Seyfried is icily classy on the surface but mischievous and lovably grounded underneath as Hearst’s mistress, Marion Davies, who formed the basis for Kane’s most controversial character, Arliss Howard (Full Metal Jacket, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, Moneyball) brings nuance and complexity to the role of MGM founder Louis B. Mayer, Tom Pelphrey (Banshee, Ozark) is understated but compelling as Mank’s younger screenwriter brother Joseph, and Lily Collins and Tuppence Middleton exude class and long-suffering stubbornness as the two main women in Mank’s life (his secretary and platonic muse, Rita Alexander, and his wife, Sara), while The Musketeers’ Tom Burke’s periodic but potent appearances as Orson Welles help to drive the story in the “present”.  Another Netflix release which I was (thankfully) able to catch on the big screen during one of the brief lulls between British lockdowns, this was a decidedly meta cinematic experience that perfectly encapsulated not only what is truly required for the creation of a screen epic, but also the latest pinnacle in the career of one of the greatest filmmakers working in the business today, powerful, stirring, intriguing and surprising in equal measure. Certainly it’s one of the most important films ABOUT so far film this century, but is it as good as Citizen Kane?  Boy, that’s a tough one …

4.  ENOLA HOLMES – ultimately, my top film for the autumn/winter movie season was also the film which finally topped my Netflix Original features list, as well as beating all other streaming offerings for the entire year (which is saying something, as you should know by now).  Had things been different, this would have been one of Warner Bros’ BIGGEST releases for the year in the cinema, of that I have no doubt, a surprise sleeper hit which would have taken the world by storm – as it is it’s STILL become a sensation, albeit in a much more mid-pandemic, lockdown home-viewing kind of way.  Before you start crying oh God no, not another Sherlock Holmes adaptation, this is a very different beast from either the Guy Ritchie take or the modernized BBC show, instead side-lining the great literary sleuth in favour of a delicious new AU version, based on The Case of the Missing Marquess, the first novel in the Enola Holmes Mysteries literary series from American YA author Nancy Springer.  Positing that Sherlock Holmes (Henry Cavill) and his elder brother Mycroft (Sam Claflin) had an equally ingenious and precocious baby sister, the film introduces us to Enola (Stranger Things’ Millie Bobby Brown), who’s been raised at home by their strong-willed mother Eudoria (Helena Bonham Carter) to be just as intelligent, well-read and intellectually skilled as her far more advantageously masculine elder siblings.  Then, on the morning of her sixteenth birthday, Enola awakens to find her mother has vanished, putting her in a pretty pickle since this leaves her a ward of Mycroft, a self-absorbed social peacock who finds her to be wilfully free-spirited and completely ill equipped to face the world, concluding that the only solution is sending her to boarding school where she’ll learn to become a proper lady.  Needless to say she’s horrified by the prospect, deciding to run away and search for her mother instead … this is about as perfect a family adventure film as you could wish for, following a vital, capable and compelling teen detective-in-the-making as she embarks on her very first investigation, as well as winding up tangled in a second to boot involving a young runaway noble, Viscount Tewkesbury, the Marquess of Basilwether (Medici’s Louis Partridge), and the film is a breezy, swift-paced and rewardingly entertaining romp that feels like a welcome breath of fresh air for a literary property which, beloved as it may be, has been adapted to death over the years.  Enola Holmes a brilliant young hero who’s perfectly crafted to carry the franchise forward in fresh new directions, and Brown brings her to life with effervescent charm, boisterous energy and mischievous irreverence that are entirely irresistible; Cavill and Claflin, meanwhile, are perfectly cast as the two very different brothers – this Sherlock is much less louche and world-weary than most previous versions, still razor sharp and intellectually restless but with a comfortable ease and a youthful spring in his step that perfectly suits the actor, while Mycroft is as superior and arrogant as ever, a preening arse we derive huge enjoyment watching Enola consistently get the best of; Bonham Carter doesn’t get a lot of screen-time but as we’d expect she does a lot with what she has to make the practical, eccentric and unapologetically modern Eudoria thoroughly memorable, while Partridge is carefree and likeable as the naïve but irresistible Tewkesbury, and there are strong supporting turns from Frances de la Tour as his stately grandmother, the Dowager, Susie Wokoma (Crazyhead, Truth Seekers) as Emily, a feisty suffragette who runs a jujitsu studio, Burn Gorman as dastardly thug-for-hire Linthorn, and Four Lions’ Adeel Akhtar as a particularly scuzzy Inspector Lestrade.  Seasoned TV director Harry Bradbeer (Fleabag, Killing Eve) makes his feature debut with an impressive splash, unfolding the action at a brisk pace while keeping the narrative firmly focused on an intricate mystery plot that throws in plenty of ingenious twists and turns before a suitably atmospheric climax and pleasing denouement which nonetheless artfully sets up more to come in the future, while screenwriter Jack Thorne (His Dark Materials, The Scouting Book for Boys, Wonder) delivers strong character work and liberally peppers the dialogue with a veritable cavalcade of witty zingers.  Boisterous, compelling, amusing, affecting and exciting in equal measure, this is a spirited and appealing slice of cinematic escapism that flatters its viewers and never talks down to them, a perfect little period adventure for a cosy Sunday afternoon.  Obviously there’s plenty of potential for more, and with further books to adapt there’s more than enough material for a pile of sequels – Neflix would be barmy indeed to turn their nose up at this opportunity …

3.  1917 – it’s a rare thing for a film to leave me truly shell-shocked by its sheer awesomeness, for me to walk out of a cinema in a genuine daze, unable to talk or even really think about much of anything for a few hours because I’m simply marvelling at what I’ve just witnessed.  Needless to say, when I do find a film like that (Fight Club, Inception, Mad Max: Fury Road) it usually earns a place very close to my heart indeed.  The latest tour-de-force from Sam Mendes is one of those films – an epic World War I thriller that plays out ENTIRELY in one shot, which doesn’t simply feel like a glorified gimmick or stunt but instead is a genuine MASTERPIECE of film, a mesmerising journey of emotion and imagination in a shockingly real environment that’s impossible to tear your eyes away from.  Sure, Mendes has impressed us before – his first film, American Beauty, is a GREAT movie, one of the most impressive feature debuts of the 2000s, while Skyfall is, in my opinion, quite simply THE BEST BOND FILM EVER MADE – but this is in a whole other league.  It’s an astounding achievement, made all the more impressive when you realise that there’s very little trickery at play here, no clever digital magic (just some augmentation here and there), it’s all real locations and sets, filmed in long, elaborately choreographed takes blended together with clever edits to make it as seamless as possible – it’s not the first film to try to do this (remember Birdman? Bushwick?), but I’ve never seen it done better, or with greater skill. But it’s not just a clever cinematic exercise, there’s a genuine story here, told with guts and urgency, and populated by real flesh and blood characters – the heart of the film is True History of the Kelly Gang’s George MacKay and Dean Chapman (probably best known as Tommen Baratheon in Game of Thrones) as Lance Corporals Will Schofield and Tom Blake, the two young tommies sent out across enemy territory on a desperate mission to stop a British regiment from rushing headlong into a German trap (Tom himself has a personal stake in this because his brother is an officer in the attack).  They’re a likeable pair, very human and relatable throughout, brave and true but never so overtly heroic that they stretch credibility, so when tragedy strikes along the way it’s particularly devastating; both deliver exceptional performances that effortlessly carry us through the film, and they’re given sterling support from a selection of top-drawer British talent, from Sherlock stars Andrew Scott and Benedict Cumberbatch to Mark Strong and Colin Firth, each delivering magnificently in small but potent cameos.  That said, the cinematography and art department are the BIGGEST stars here, masterful veteran DOP Roger Deakins (The Shawshank Redemption, Blade Runner 2049 and pretty much the Coen Brothers’ entire back catalogue among MANY others) making every frame sing with beauty, horror, tension or tragedy as the need arises, and the environments are SO REAL it feels less like production design than that someone simply sent the cast and crew back in time to film in the real Northern France circa 1917 – from a nightmarish trek across No Man’s Land to a desperate chase through a ruined French village lit only by dancing flare-light in the darkness before dawn, every scene is utterly immersive and simply STUNNING.  I don’t think it’s possible for Mendes to make a film better than this, but I sure hope he gives it a go all the same.  Either way, this was the most incredible, exhausting, truly AWESOME experience I had at the cinema all year – it’s a film that DESERVES to be seen on the big screen, and I feel truly sorry for those who missed the chance …

2.  BIRDS OF PREY & THE FANTABULOUS EMANCIPATION OF ONE HARLEY QUINN – the only reason 1917 isn’t at number two is because Warner Bros.’ cinematic DC Extended Universe project FINALLY got round to bringing my favourite DC Comics title to the big screen.  It was been the biggest pleasure of my cinematic year getting to see my top DC superheroines brought to life on the big screen, and it was done in high style, in my opinion THE BEST of the DCEU films to date (yup, I loved it EVEN MORE than the Wonder Woman movies).  It was also great seeing Harley Quinn return after her show-stealing turn in David Ayer’s clunky but ultimately still hugely enjoyable Suicide Squad, better still that they got her SPOT ON this time – this is the Harley I’ve always loved in the comics, unpredictable, irreverent and entirely without regard for what anyone else thinks of her, as well as one talented psychiatrist.  Margot Robbie once more excels in the role she was basically BORN to play, clearly relishing the chance to finally do Harley TRUE justice, and she’s a total riot from start to finish, infectiously lovable no matter what crazy, sometimes downright REPRIHENSIBLE antics she gets up to.  Needless to say she’s the nominal star here, her latest ill-advised adventure driving the story – finally done with the Joker and itching to make her emancipation official, Harley publicly announces their breakup by blowing up Ace Chemicals (their love spot, basically), inadvertently painting a target on her back in the process since she’s no longer under the assumed protection of Gotham’s feared Clown Prince of Crime – but that doesn’t mean she eclipses the other main players the movie’s REALLY supposed to be about.  Each member of the Birds of Prey is beautifully written and brought to vivid, arse-kicking life by what had to be 2020’s most exciting cast – Helena Bertinelli, the Huntress, is the perfect character for Mary Elizabeth Winstead to finally pay off on that action hero potential she showed in Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World, but this is a MUCH more enjoyable role outside of the fight choreography because while Helena may be a world-class dark avenger, socially she’s a total dork, which just makes her thoroughly adorable; Rosie Perez is similarly perfect casting as Renee Montoya, the uncompromising pint-sized Gotham PD detective who kicks against the corrupt system no matter what kind of trouble it gets her into, and just gets angrier all the time, paradoxically making us like her even more; and then there’s the film’s major controversy, at least as far as the fans are concerned, namely one Cassandra Cain.  Sure, this take is VERY different from the comics’ version (a nearly mute master assassin who went on to become the second woman to wear the mask of Batgirl before assuming her own crime-fighting mantle as Black Bat and now Orphan), but personally I like to think this is simply Cass at THE VERY START of her origin story, leaving plenty of time for her to discover her warrior origins when the DCEU finally gets around to introducing her mum, Lady Shiva (personally I want Michelle Yeoh to play her, but that’s just me) – anyways, here she’s a skilled child pickpocket whose latest theft inadvertently sets off the larger central plot, and newcomer Ella Jay Basco brings a fantastic pre-teen irreverence and spiky charm to the role, beautifully playing against Robbie’s mercurial energy.  My favourite here BY FAR, however, is Dinah Lance, aka the Black Canary (not only my favourite Bird of Prey but my very favourite DC superheroine PERIOD), the choice of up-and-comer Jurnee Smollet-Bell (Friday Night Lights, Underground) proving to be the film’s most inspired casting – a club singer with the metahuman ability to emit piercing supersonic screams, she’s also a ferocious martial artist (in the comics she’s one of the very best fighters IN THE WORLD), as well as a wonderfully pure soul you just can’t help loving, and it made me SO UNBELIEVABLY HAPPY that they got my Canary EXACTLY RIGHT.  Altogether they’re a fantastic bunch of badass ladies, basically my perfect superhero team, and the way they’re all brought together (along with Harley, of course) is beautifully thought out and perfectly executed … they’ve also got one hell of a threat to overcome, namely Gotham crime boss Roman Sionis, the Black Mask, one of the Joker’s chief rivals – Ewan McGregor brings his A-game in a frustratingly rare villainous turn (my number one bad guy for the movie year), a monstrously narcissistic, woman-hating control freak with a penchant for peeling off the faces of those who displease him, sharing some exquisitely creepy chemistry with Chris Messina (The Mindy Project) as Sionis’ nihilistic lieutenant Victor Zsasz.  This is about as good as superhero cinema gets, a perfect example of the sheer brilliance you get when you switch up the formula to create something new, an ultra-violent, unapologetically R-rated middle finger to the classic tropes, a fantastic black comedy thrill ride that’s got to be the most full-on feminist blockbuster ever made – it’s helmed by a woman (Dead Pigs director Cathy Yan), written by a woman (Bumblebee’s Christina Hodson), produced by more women and ABOUT a bunch of badass women magnificently triumphing over toxic masculinity in all its forms.  It’s also simply BRILLIANT – the cast are all clearly having a blast, the action sequences are first rate (the spectacular GCPD evidence room fight in which Harley gets to REALLY cut loose is the undisputable highlight), it has a gleefully anarchic sense of humour and is simply BURSTING with phenomenal homages, references and in-jokes for the fans (Bruce the hyena! Stuffed beaver! Roller derby!).  It’s also got a killer soundtrack, populated almost exclusively by numbers from female artists.  Altogether, then, this is the VERY BEST the DCEU has to offer to date, and VERY NEARLY my absolute FAVOURITE film of 2020.  Give it all the love you can, it sure as hell deserves it.

1.  TENET – granted, the streaming platforms (particularly Netflix and Amazon) certainly saved our cinematic summer, but I’m still IMMEASURABLY glad that my ultimate top-spot winner FOR THE WHOLE YEAR was one I got to experience on THE BIG SCREEN. You gotta hand it to Christopher Nolan, he sure hung in there, stubbornly determined that his latest cinematic masterpiece WOULD be released in cinemas in the summer (albeit ultimately landing JUST inside the line in the final week of August and ultimately taking the bite at the box office because of the still shaky atmosphere), and it was worth all the fuss because, for me, this was THE PERFECT MOVIE for me to get return to cinemas with.  I mean, okay, in the end it WASN’T the FIRST new movie I saw after the first reopening, that honour went to Unhinged, but THIS was my first real Saturday night-out big screen EXPERIENCE since March.  Needless to say, Nolan didn’t disappoint this time any more than he has on any of his consistently spectacular previous releases, delivering another twisted, mind-boggling headfuck of a full-blooded experiential sensory overload that comes perilously close to toppling his long-standing auteur-peak, Inception (itself second only by fractions to The Dark Knight as far as I’m concerned). To say much at all about the plot would give away major spoilers – personally I’d recommend just going in as cold as possible, indeed you really should just stop reading this right now and just GO SEE IT.  Still with us?  Okay … the VERY abridged version is that it’s about a secret war being waged between the present and the future by people capable of “inverting” time in substances, objects, people, whatever, into which the Protagonist (BlacKkKlansman’s John David Washington), an unnamed CIA agent, has been dispatched in order to prevent a potential coming apocalypse. Washington is once again on top form, crafting a robust and compelling morally complex heroic lead who’s just as comfortable negotiating the minefields of black market intrigue as he is breaking into places or dispatching heavies, Kenneth Branagh delivers one of his most interesting and memorable performances in years as brutal Russian oligarch Andrei Sator, a genuinely nasty piece of work who was ALMOST the year’s very best screen villain, Elizabeth Debicki (The Night Manager, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, Widows) brings strength, poise and wounded integrity to the role of Sator’s estranged wife, Kat, and Aaron Taylor-Johnson gets to use his own accent for once as tough-as-nails British Intelligence officer Ives, while there are brief but consistently notable supporting turns and cameos from Martin Donovan, Yesterday’s Himesh Patel, Dirk Gently’s Fiona Dourif and, of course, Nolan’s good luck charm, Michael Caine.  The cast’s biggest surprise, however, is Robert Pattinson, truly a revelation in what has to be, HANDS DOWN, his best role to date, Neil, the Protagonist’s mysterious handler – he’s by turns cheeky, slick, duplicitous and thoroughly badass, delivering an enjoyably multi-layered, chameleonic performance which proves what I’ve long maintained, that the former Twilight star is actually a fucking amazing actor, and on the basis of this, even if that amazing new teaser trailer wasn’t making the rounds, I think the debate about whether or not he’s the right choice for the new Batman is now academic.  As we’ve come to expect from Nolan, this is a TRUE tour-de-force experience, a visual triumph and an endlessly engrossing head-scratcher, Nolan’s screenplay bringing in seriously big ideas and throwing us some major narrative knots and loopholes, constantly wrong-footing the viewer while also setting up truly revelatory payoffs from seemingly low-key, unimportant beginnings – this is a film you need to be awake and attentive for or you could miss something pretty vital. The action sequences are, as ever, second to none, some of the year’s very best set-pieces coming thick and fast and executed with some of the most accomplished skill in the business, while Nolan-regular cinematographer Hoyte van Hoytema (Interstellar and Dunkirk, as well as the heady likes of Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, SPECTRE and Ad Astra) once again shows he’s one of the best camera-wizards in the business today by delivering some absolutely mesmerising visuals.  Notably, Nolan’s other regular collaborator, composer Hans Zimmer, is absent here (although he had good reason, since he was working on his dream project at the time, the fast-approaching screen adaptation of Dune), but Ludwig Göransson (best known for his collaborations with Ryan Coogler Fruitvale Station, Creed and Black Panther, as well as career-best work on The Mandalorian) is a fine replacement, crafting an intriguingly internalised, post-modern musical landscape that thrums and pulses in time with the story and emotions of the characters rather than the action itself. Interestingly it’s on the subject of sound that some of the film’s rare detractions have been levelled, and I can see some of the points – the soundtrack mix is an all-encompassing thing, and there are times when the dialogue can be overwhelmed, but in Nolan’s defence this film is a heady, immersive experience, something you really need to concentrate on, so these potential flaws are easily forgiven.  As a work of filmmaking art, this is another flawless wonder from one of the true masters of the craft working in cinema today, but it’s art with palpable substance, a rewarding whole that proved truly unbeatable in 2020 …

[annacwrites]

the wip list

Alright, gang. Buckle up. This is going to be a long one, and at this point I can’t even bring myself to be sorry about it. I meant to put this off but then I started thinking about it, so here we are (at 1:05 in the morning when I have to work at 8:30, what am I doing?). 

I’m going to break this down in a couple of ways—fanfiction vs. original fiction, fandom (if it’s a fanfic), series/universe (if it’s in one), and then the individual books themselves (if I have the ability to do that, because quite frankly, for some of these I don’t because I have no idea what the titles are or where I’m splitting the story yet).

Also, “WIP” is an incredibly broad term here. In some cases it means I’ve already written the whole thing but I plan to 100% rewrite it (and haven’t started yet). In some cases it means I’ve written half of the thing but haven’t finished yet. In some cases it means I have it all outlined but haven’t started writing yet. In some cases it means I haven’t really touched an outline on paper yet but I have it all worked out in my head. Take the “in progress” part of WIP with a grain of salt.

(Putting this whole thing under the cut because it is so freaking long. I apologize if the read-more doesn’t work on your dash. Idk what tumblr is doing.)  

Starting off easy—the fics:

Harry Potter: (JKR can fuck off with her transphobia and cultural appropriation and all the other stupid and fucked-up shit that she’s done/promoted but, as I said to my friends, she can pry my next-gen fanfics from my cold dead hands. Cursed Child is not canon in my life because I’ve never read it and I don’t care what nonsense she came up with.)

The “In Your Arms I’ll Stay” universe (Tedtoire/Scorose): 

The first fic in this universe is the first fic I ever finished. 110k words followed up by a ~137k word sequel. It is a disaster and a half but it’s also my baby and I fully intend to rewrite it one of these days. It is full of standard Tedtoire trope-y nonsense—best friends since childhood! two-year age gap! jealousy about other relationships! obliviousness!—and at 15 I thought it was a really good idea to try to turn it into a mystery too, which is a mistake that I have every intention of rectifying because it was unnecessary and I just didn’t know how to do drama and tension back then. 

Anyway. It will probably be two parts again when I rewrite it because one part per school year just works, yeah? We’re covering Vic’s fifth/Teddy’s seventh year and Vic’s sixth year/Teddy’s first year out of school over the course of these parts.

Within this universe we also have Heartbeat and Bone, which is a Scorose fic that I’ve written probably 75% of already but have no intention of actually finishing before I rewrite it. I want to get the stories in the right order so that I can get details straightened out, so Teddy and Victoire get the rewrites first and then I’ll be revisiting this fic. Also full of trope-y nonsense (and my continued acceptance of the headcanon that the Heads have their own dormitory at Hogwarts, because it’s just too much fun that way).  

some things were meant to be (Tedtoire):

Oh god, another fic with a cliché title taken from Can’t Help Falling In Love. I have zero regrets because it fits them perfectly.

This one is... half-done? I fully intend to finish it but I need to finish the outline first. It was my 2019 NaNoWriMo project and I am 100% just writing it for the lols (and because Teddy and Vic are like... my comfort ship where writing is concerned). I wanted to play with a different universe and change up their relationship and roles at school a bit, but once again... trope-y nonsense. It’s unavoidable with them. There is obliviousness everywhere. 

Star Wars: (it’s Reylo, okay? It’s Reylo. I don’t want to hear it about how the ship is ~so terrible.~ That is literally the furthest thing in the world from a hot take, you can’t say a single thing that I haven’t heard before, and I’m a grown adult and can do what I want. Bite me.)

looking for the map that leads me home (Reylo): 

Stole the title on this one from We Take Care of Our Own by Bruce Springsteen, because why the fuck not, right? 

To put it simply: musician AU. To put it a little less simply: he’s got a dead career, she wants to have even the slightest shot at one, Rose is the best, Poe’s a singing heartthrob, Finn is a love-struck goofball. You know, all that fun stuff. The entire thing is based on a playlist that I made and every chapter has a song that acts as its theme. I haven’t touched it since January 2018. I want to finish it eventually but it’s not really at the top of the priority list. 

There’s a few other fics from other fandoms that I’ve started and never finished but the odds of me touching them again are like... nonexistent, so I’m not including them here. I’ll update this post if anything changes on that front (but it probably won’t).

Now for the complicated part—the original fiction:

Maker’s Magic 

This is a trilogy (or at least, it’s supposed to be). This is also a rewrite of the first story I ever finished—the fantasy novel that I wrote for my first-ever Camp NaNoWriMo back in August of 2011, when I had literally no clue what I was doing at all and essentially stole the plot structure from The Obsidian Trilogy by Mercedes Lackey and built my own story around it. This is not a good way to write a piece of fiction that you want to publish, kids, but it is a damn good way to get your feet wet when you’ve never really written before.

I am reworking this story entirely from scratch. The characters are... kind of the same as the original story. Kind of. Maybe. I’ve changed a few names and merged a few people together and scrapped some others and entirely shifted the backstory of pretty much everyone, but... they’re definitely still the same, right? 

Basically, at this point the plot is really only similar to The Obsidian Trilogy in that we’ve got a trilogy, we’ve got some elves, and it’s your standard good vs. evil fantasy story (in its own unique fashion, of course). I’m still working out the details of this rewrite, but this is kind of the Holy Grail of all of my writing projects and the one that I’m most concerned about getting right, so I’m anticipating that I’ll be in it for the long haul on this one. I’m hoping I might be able to get a draft of the first book done this year, but... we’ll see.

(I also don’t want to give too many details about this project, ‘cause it’s the one that I’d really like to maybe publish one day, so...)

The Willow Hill universe

This started as a single story plus a standalone sequel set in the same universe, conceptualized when I was fourteen and missing horseback riding terribly (so yes, it is a story for all those Weird Horse Girls™ out there). I wrote a good portion of it, then deleted it, then rewrote the entire thing, then deleted it again a few years ago because I was no longer satisfied with the writing quality (after hitting top 100 on the Teen Fiction list on Wattpad way back when, so... I didn’t do too badly as a 16-year-old, but the writing still sucked). I’ve been promising a rewrite to my Wattpad followers since 2016 or something like that (2014? Whenever the hell it was that I deleted it the second time) but haven’t delivered at all.

I now envision this universe as a duology plus the aforementioned standalone sequel, except it’s not entirely fair to call it a YA duology in that the first book is definitely YA, but the second is more romance-y?

I originally just revealed the main character’s endgame relationship in the epilogue of the story, but I love both her and her boyfriend and their relationship so much that I decided that I’m going to be self-indulgent and write the story of them actually falling in love with each other, so that’s book two (so really, you don’t actually have to read book two to understand anything, I’m just writing it because I want to and it’s also kind of a present to anyone who read the original story when they were also a teenager and is now an adult who wants to read other stuff). 

Book one is now about the teenage struggle of crushes and trying to figure out what it is that you actually want out of your life and what you value (I say “now” because it was definitely way more self-insert-y the first time I wrote it and it is decidedly not at this point). It’s also sort of a love letter to trainers who are amazing and the kind of person we should all be so lucky as to be coached by.

These characters are my comfort characters where original fiction is concerned since they’ve been bouncing around in my head for the last ten years or so, and I’m hoping I can get at least the first book rewritten in the next year-ish, partly because I’ve been promising it for so long, and partly because I just really enjoy this world and I want to get back to it again.

The Coffee Shop Chronicles

AKA, I lived in one coffee shop on my university campus for pretty much the entirety of my college experience and it was a very inspiring place to be, so this has less to do with coffee shop AUs and more to do with the fact that I met several of my favorite human beings on this earth over a vanilla chai latte and mutual sass with the baristas.

(One of said baristas is very near and dear to me and introduced me to another regular who is now a very good friend with the statement “You’re both sarcastic assholes. You’ll love each other.”) 

None of the characters in this universe are based on actual human beings whom I know, but I liked the idea of the campus coffee shop serving as this thing that tangentially connected all of these people to one another, much in the way that I am tangentially connected to god knows how many people via my barista friend. Essentially, the idea is that the stories in this universe are all standalone, but the characters sometimes cross paths with one another at Caffeinated, so it’s sort of... Easter-egg-y in terms of who pops up where in which story. 

Currently I only have two stories in this universe that are legitimately plotted out, but there is room for any number of spin-offs based on whichever characters show up in those stories (or don’t—that’s the fun of it being a coffee shop. The barista is the only reliable character). Those two stories are as follows:

Chance Encounters (title so totally subject to change, also stealing the terribly summary from the Wattpad draft that never saw the light of day):

For Bennett McGuire, things with guys just didn't seem to want to go her way. From the disasters that were her attempts at dating in high school to the problem that had been Elijah Becker, she hadn't exactly had the best luck. With all that in mind, it made perfect sense to swear off dating until she finished college—that is, it made sense until one frozen day in February when Gordon Evans walked into her life. After that, who was to say what would happen?

What’s Your Metaphor? (once again, enjoy the terrible summary from the Wattpad draft that never was. I am cringing reading it but also too tired to come up with anything better):

"What's the point?" 

It's a question asked widely, for all sorts of reasons, and it's one that April Hayes didn't know the answer to any better than anyone else. All she knew was that she had her plan, and she was going to stick to it, because it was the only thing that seemed to have any sort of logic to it in her life. The things she thought, the things she believed—well, they all fell before the plan, because she didn't have time to ask herself "What's the point?"

That is, she didn't have the time to know the answer—her answer—until one guy by the name of Drew Collier showed up and made her consider things that she had never even thought of before.

High Blood

Yinz can go read my WIP introduction post for this one. It’s a fantasy story. Just for the hell of it, here’s the summary from said WIP introduction post: 

At the age of seventeen, Thessaly of Averak had a choice—take the crown of her people and her place as her father’s heir, or set it aside to become one of the High Warriors, dedicated to protecting their people and the country that her long-dead ancestor Enred built after leading its citizens out of a long and bloody war. Amidst raids and famine at the borders, she gave up her crown to better serve the people that her family rules.

Ten years later, all is quiet. At least, all is quiet until Beca’s pendant is stolen by a thief who disappears into the night on the journey back from the summer palace, Tess gets herself stabbed, and the discovery is made that the rock-solid foundations of their family’s claim to the throne—and the peace that depends upon them—are laced with hairline fractures.

(I didn’t write anything to speak of for Camp NaNo July 2020 and actually wound up deleting my project for this on the NaNo site because my dad was hit by a car while cycling the Friday before the weekend when I was planning to write like... 30k words to catch up, so obviously I gave up on that plan (he is doing well now, thank you for asking). I’m hoping I’ll get around to this one eventually because this particular universe arguably has the most potential for having multiple stories set in it, fantasy-wise.)

Emerson’s Lights

Natalie Flynn has been best friends with Evan Acheson practically since birth. They've stuck together through thick and thin, from her braces in seventh grade to his jump to stardom as a singer-songwriter their freshman year of college. 

She’d do anything for him, but spending a week with him on tour involves a lot more than she bargained for, culminating in the turn of events that is Caleb Blake, lead singer and primary songwriter of opening act Emerson’s Lights, moving into her house for the better part of a month.

She always knew there would be complications being the best friend of a rock star, but this? This was one that she didn’t bet on.

(Aka, girl meets boy in a band trope. Yay.)

(NaNoWriMo 2020 project)

The famous musician story (this thing doesn’t have a title right now and I’m not even going to try)

Stupid, trope-y nonsense idea that I came up with for my own personal amusement and nothing else. I’ve written a few chapters of it but genuinely have no idea where this falls in the hierarchy of things that I want to get done. Long story short, she’s in grad school for history, he’s a famous musician in town recording for a new album, they meet in the library, she pretends she has no idea who he is, and shenanigans ensue.

And that is where I think I’m going to leave it. There’s four other stories that I can think of off the top of my head that I could theoretically add to this list, but they are legitimately just ideas right now so they can be added at a later date when they’ve manifested themselves a little more strongly. There’s also another quartet in the Willow Hill universe that I came up with in high school that could theoretically be added but I think I might just steal those character names and give them their own little world instead. We’ll see.

Basically, if you didn’t get the point from this list: I am working on a lot of things, and when I say I’m writing, it could mean literally anything on this list (or any of the other ideas that I have floating around). The stories/universe here are the most likely candidates for my time, depending on whether I’m doing a deep dive into my writing or just playing around with something fun, and hopefully (god, hopefully) I’ll be able to move one or two of these to a “completed works” list in the next year(ish). 

(Or at least, as complete as a draft ever gets before you start going in on it again.)

[evak-fic-rec-turtleanon]

Evak Fics - Reconciliation

Read the tags as a few might be open ending. And in some of these they were still together in the beginning. Man, this list is angsty! I’m already planning on rereading them.

This will be under a read more.

Light by bri_ness (885 words) - Open ending. Even lays a beach towel down on the small patch of grass beside his apartment building’s parking lot, right beside the dumpster. He knows romance can thrive in spite of its setting. He looks at the stars, and he remembers. 

pull him back by hippopotamus (2k words) - “That’s my hoodie,” Isak says. “You left it at mine,” Even replies, as if Isak wasn’t fully aware of that. “And you didn’t ask for it back.” 

Resolution by bri_ness (2k words) - Isak's residency has him questioning his decision to be a doctor. When he's home for the holidays, he runs into Even, who gives him a new perspective. 

No One Knows Me Like You Do by obscurial (2.6k words) - He’s also shockingly sober, which only serves to remind him that fuck, he doesn’t even have an excuse for randomly messaging his ex-boyfriend of two years, out of the blue, at a socially unacceptable time to text your ex, if there even was one in the first place. 

Still Unformed by colazitron (3k words) - Even and Isak broke up a few years ago when Even moved to Germany to attend film school. Now he's moved back to Oslo. 

there's no one else I'd rather do this with by daddyhonkkk (3k words) - Even still has the extra Gabrielle ticket Isak got him for his birthday, but that was before they broke up. 

Like Breathing by BraveKate (3k words) - Even invites Isak to the premiere of his first movie. Part of a series but could be read as a standalone. 

left-handed by thekardemomme (3.5k words) - even always asks questions he doesn’t want to know the answers to. 

If Only by Stria (Asia117) (3.6k words) - Chatting with a random stranger that turns out to be your ex trope.

o night divine by thekardemomme (4k words) - This is the first Christmas in nearly five years that he’s spending without Isak, and while he still decorated his apartment and bought eggnog and spent an excruciating amount of time wrapping all of his gifts perfectly, the hole in his heart hasn’t gone unnoticed. 

Homesick by everything_else (4k words) - 5 times they take care of each other after the break up. +1 

Waking up to Nothing by dropdeadfox (4.6k words) - It’s been six months since Even has seen that grumpy- but- adorable pout on the most perfect pair of lips imaginable to men (and women). It’s been six months since he has heard that voice, it’s been six months since he has seen the most perfect, emerald- green eyes, gazing back at him. 

42 Seconds by thekardemomme (5k words) - Sunday is Isak’s ideal day. The day he looks forward to. This Sunday, Isak wakes up at 1pm, and the room is dark. The bed is empty and there’s no smell of breakfast. Even hasn’t slept next to him all week. The only thing that’s the same as every other Sunday for the past 23 months is the fact that Isak doesn’t want to get out of bed. 

Inbox: (1) New Email by scritch (6k words) - A story about falling back in love, one tweet, instagram post and email at a time 

the one where even says the wrong name by pansexuaIeven (6.5k words) - Even's getting married to Sonja, not Isak. The real question is: does he know that? Inspired by Friends. 

Shatter Me by givemesumaurgravy (6.6k words) - Even’s crying, he has been since the words ‘I slept with someone else’ left his mouth. To be honest, he’s been crying for hours since he got home from Mikael’s. Isak just sits there stoically and he says, “I’m not going to yell or any of that. I’m just going to make this really fucking awkward and uncomfortable for you.” “I want you to tell me everything that happened,” 

That look you give that guy by Lokkanel (7.4k words) - Isak and Even love each other in secret. It is almost thrilling at first, but when hiding and lying to their friends begin to take a toll on Even, Isak decides to end it all. He thinks he has taken the right decision, until Even eventually moves on with someone else. 

Calleth You, Cometh I by Kollakolan (8.4k words) - “Isak!” Mikaels pipes up. “Didn´t you two have a thing?” he turns to Even. A thing, Even thinks to himself. Yes, Isak and him definitely had a thing. They actually had a low-key thing going for years, but it never really turned into something more. The timing was never right.  

We Keep This Love in a Photograph by kapplebougher (8.7k words) - It's been four weeks since Isak and Even made the decision to call it off. Now, Isak's back in their apartment of seven years and he's supposed to be moving out, but then he stumbles upon some memories that makes doing that a little difficult. 

Our Steady True North by verlore_poplap (orphan_account) (9k words) - Five times Isak and Even were amicable; plus one time they just weren't. Plus an epilogue 

In Vino Veritas by Sabeley (9.9k words) - After seven years apart, Isak wakes up to find Even in his bed and a wedding ring on his finger.

What becomes of the broken hearted by Kikki1 (12k words) - Set many years after Skam ended. Isak is living the life he always dreamed of. He has a good job, amazing friends and a superhot boyfriend. But his heart is forever broken. 

we still fuck by evak1isak (13k words) - Isak and Even had broken up. Period. But they couldn’t keep their hands off each other.  

Heal My Heart for Christmas by iwritetropesnottragedies (recklesslee) (13.5k words) - It’s been ten years since Isak left his small town for the big city of Oslo with his father. He hardly even thought of his time there anymore. Until he received a letter from his mother asking him to come home for Christmas for the first time since he had left. 

in these deep solitudes and awful cells by hippopotamus (14k words) - it ends badly. so badly that they both wish they could forget about it. they meet again a few weeks later, and it’s hard to remember why it had to end. 

If I Should Fall Behind by MinilocIsland (14k words) -  The plan for tonight had been crystal clear. Stay close to his best friend, and steal her away if needed. Hold her hand through the ordeal of meeting Noora again for the first time in years. Then Even shows up – and suddenly, nothing goes the way it was supposed to.

The Good Side by lavenderlady by (15k words) - Isak got the good side of the break up. 

And after that and after that by Teatrolley (18k words) - They’re friends, and roommates, and exes. Then Even becomes single again 

you told me we were forever by Skamtrash (19k words) - they don’t exactly get back together. Isak finds out he's having a baby soon after Even breaks up with him so he makes the decision not to tell him. Except Even finds out on his own 3 years later. 

I'll be right beside you by hannakin (20k words) - ”It’s ironic isn’t it? I broke your heart and now mine is not working,” Isak continued. “Isak…” Even fought against the lump in his throat and the tears that burned behind his eyes. see the sequel below  

Don't Dream It's Over by hannakin (11k words) - WIP last update march 2019. A new chance at life for Isak and a new shot at love for them that Even is not going to waste. Not this time around. 

Let Me In by milk_o_vich (20k words) - Even’s eyes were wide and a little unfocused, flitting over Isak nervously. He was quiet for a long time, rain hitting the pavement outside, and Isak became kind of aware that Even must be freezing in his thin, damp t-shirt. Even pressed his lips together, then said, voice hoarse and quiet, “Can I stay here tonight?” 

Just give me a reason, just a little bit’s enough by Amfelia (21k words) - Even discovers life is not always shiny and bright, sometimes it is just really hard. 

shred by Jules1398 (22k words) - There were two versions of Isak Valtersen. The first Isak was the one that his friends knew. The second Isak, the real Isak, was much more complicated. He was trans, gay, and then there was his five year-old son, Adrian. Keeping the two Isaks separate wasn't that difficult. At least, not until he saw Even again. 

and you fight until the finish line carries you home by strangetowns (23k words) - “Did you love him?” Isak looked down at the glass in his hand, the wine he’d barely had any of. He shrugged, carefully noncommittal, and glanced at Even out of the corner of his eye, raising an eyebrow at his expression. “What, are you jealous?” “Hearing it makes me glad, actually.” “Why?” A beat of silence. Then - “You deserve all the chances at happiness you can get, Isak.”

We're Not Broken Just Bent by TotallyTinkerbell (26k words) - They had made a decision that didn’t fall easy on either of them. A decision that still kept Isak awake at night in his bed that was too big and in his kitchen that was too empty in the mornings. On the couch in front of his tv-cabinet which was void of Even’s film collection, and in his hallway which no longer had a dozen pairs of shoes in it. 

Self Control by nofeartina (28k words) - “I never meant to hurt you, Isak.” Without any pause Isak replies, “Well, you did.” He looks him in the eyes, and continues. “You fucked me up, Even.” 

Reflections by Laika_the_husband (30k words) - He started walking, listening to Even’s footsteps behind him. Fucking Even. Isak knew he didn’t do this on purpose, that it was just an episode, but he had just grown so tired of them. Every time Even relapsed Isak remembered how only a few years ago he had sworn to take care of him forever. How certain he had been, back then, that minute by minute would turn into day by day and week by week and year by year and then into forever. 

Different, but same by Crazyheart (31k words) - Isak and Even had broken up almost a year ago, and Even was devastated. At Easter he tried to get over it and went on a ski holiday with Yousef and Elias. At the cabin he met a guy that looked like Isak, except his dark, buzz cut hair, well trained body and rough, charismatic personality. The fact that he called himself Markus Simensen was even more confusing 

Scene Three, Take Two by folerdetdufoler (31k words) - Isak is 23, a student in the veterinary program at NMBU, and working an internship at a clinic in Kongsvinger. He hasn't seen Even in three years, but randomly bumps into him on the street when he's visiting his mom in Oslo. 

No day without it by skambition (32k words) - And his lips. Those goddamn lips. They brought back memories that Even had tried to forget about for like 10 years now, memories of laughing, smiling, kissing. 

and the whole world is empty by dreamer_of_dreams (45k words) - The conversations were always stilted and quiet and benignly untrue. The phone calls eventually petered out. So, Even did what he thought was right for Isak. On an ordinary Thursday, eating dinner next to each other on the couch, Even looked up from his bowl of noodles, glanced at the clock ticking 9.21 pm and said, “I think we should break up.” 

Every Minute Gets Easier by CrochetingWords (50k words) - His life had turned out beyond his wildest dreams. It was amazing, and when it got bad from time to time, that was still fine, it was still worth it, because the bad times were just a glimpse in their epic story and the good times were just so good, so pure, so abundant, that he knew they would make it through every struggle. Together. Which is why Isak never imagined his current situation: Filing an application for separation. 

Carry on by hannakin (52k words) - For a moment Even just looked at him. Beautiful, amazing Even who was the best thing that had ever happened to Isak. There were tears in his eyes too. When he shook his head sadly, one tear made its way down his cheek. “I think I want to break up” He finally whispered. 

God Only Knows (What I'd Do Without You) by sundaymournin (52k words) - the break up that would never really happen, but imagine if it did. If Even moved to Trondheim for Uni and returned a little over two years later. Imagine what Isak would do, who he would be, and what could've happened but definitely never would've. 

Love is a battlefield by Minutebyminute (56k words) - Love conquers all. Love defeats all. Sometimes love pulls you apart. Sometimes for a period in time, sometimes forever. And sometimes love is a battlefield.

I Feel It When You Don't Look At Me by photographer_of_thoughts (66k words) - A sequel. “I never wanted to leave without you, Even.” Isak whispered. “I know. But you did. And I let you go.” 

The Boy Who Couldn't Hold His Breath Underwater by patrick_ (camille0078) (102k words) - Now, Even is ready to own up to his mistakes and asks Isak if he wants to get back together again. Isak has no doubt about getting back together, but everyone else believes that he's just asking for more trouble. 

All Stories Are Echoes by sebastianL (felix_atticus) (123k words) - A love story. Because that's the kind of story it has to be. This is an Even who's grown up, who's had hard years since the last time we saw him, and who's trying to get his life back together on his own. This is about potential--realized or not--memory, bravery, movies, accidents, and the nature of stories. (I love this fic so much!)  

WIP - I'm not sure if they all are getting back together

Dysecdysis (a tender history in skin) by unsungyellowraincoat (9k words) - last update Feb 2019. Isak and Even are ex-boyfriends, but S3 never happened, so this is completely au. Terje Valtersen is recovering from a hemorrhagic stroke and that plays a big role in this story. 

We, who quietly bleed by howmanyisaksandevens (31k words) - last update May 2018. They break up, they get back together, they live happily ever after or so I choose to believe. 

The One That Got Away by cami_soul (37k words) - last update Sept 2019. In this AU Even never reached out to Isak on December 9. Isak never left the Christmas concert to go find Even. Even rejected all of Isak’s attempts to reach out to him. Isak came to accept Sonja’s statement that Even never really loved him. It is ten years later and Isak has just moved back to Oslo to work at the University of Oslo’s, Department of Medical Genetics. 

I swear that I will wake up next to you by dantetrieswriting (7k words) - last update July 2018. They were on-and-off for three years. Now two years have passed and Isak is 20 and in need of something exciting. An ad ropes him into booking a seat for a month long bus trip to Greece. It's new. It's interesting. It's cheap. Could it get any better? Yes it could. The ad didn't include the slight 6 foot blonde inconvenience going by the name of Even Bech Næsheim. And the fact that the inconvenience would be no more than five centimeters away from him at all times. Thirty days and 6 feet of sex on legs. 

There's nowhere i'd rather be by JustALittleBitOfYou (4k words) - last update March 2019. It's been a year since Even Bech Næsheim and Isak Valtersen broke-up. Well, technically, it's been a year since Isak sent Even away without a real reason. As they both try to rebuild their life, the Bech Næsheim siblings decide to host a one-week party in Mia's and Even's new couple's honor. Isak attends the party, without knowing the identity of the hosts. 

isak in the bathroom by sundaymournin (14k words) - 4/5 chapters posted. break-up fic where isak hides in the bathroom quite a bit, even is dating mikael, and everything is a bit off-center.

The Good Side by sundaymournin (12k words) - last update July 2018. The only thing Isak had in life was Even and the promise they’d made to each other when they were ten and twelve. Isak and Even used to date, broke up, but are still roommates. 

[the-light-followed]

MORT (1987) [DISC. #4; DEATH #1]

“‘Why did you have to save me?’  The answer worried him.  He thought about it as he squelched all the way home.  …As he lay shivering in bed it settled in his dreams like an iceberg. In the midst of his fever he muttered, ‘What did he mean, FOR LATER?’”

Rating: 6/10

Standalone Okay: Yes

Read First: Sure, why not!

Discworld Books Masterpost: [x]

* * * * * * * * * *

I’m just going to get it out of the way right off the bat: as much as I hate to admit it, the Death books are my least favorite of the Discworld sub-series.  (I mean, I still love them, a lot, but I don’t love them as much.)  And I know, I know—Death is an excellent character, and I love all of his cameos in the other Discworld books.  I love Susan Sto Helit, because I’m a sensible human lady with eyes and I recognize a brilliant, beautiful powerhouse of a woman when I read about her.  But the Death books just…aren’t my favorite.

And it’s doubly strange that I still think that’s true, even though Reaper Man might be my favorite Discworld book, depending on the day.  It’s definitely top three.

Mort, though, is—kind of boring.  Actually, no.  Let me rephrase that, without the italics this time: Mort is kind of boring.  The story itself is unique, and the concept is fantastically interesting, and I’m almost sad about that.  Because Mort, the character, is unimpressive.  I spend half the time reading this book wanting to grab him by the shoulders and shake some sense into him.  It might just be that he’s a teenage idiot—I do sort of have the same feeling with him (and especially all his interactions with Princess Keli) that I do any time I’m forced to read Romeo and Juliet. It’s a sort of constant, high-pitched, internal shriek of rage and distress.

Stop that!  Stop what you’re doing right now!  Grow some common goddamn sense!!

But he never does.  I am continually disappointed.

Even beyond his regrettable life choices, the kid is just dull.  Some early text flavor we get for Mort includes gems such as: “Mort was interested in lots of things.  Why people’s teeth fitted together so neatly, for example.  He’d given that one a lot of thought.  Then there was the puzzle of why the sun came out during the day, instead of at night when the light would come in useful.  He knew the standard explanation, which somehow didn’t seem satisfying.”

Yikes, buddy.  Yikes. Might as well be interested in watching paint dry.

It’s wild to me that of everyone and everything involved in Mort, Pratchett picked—well, Mort—to be his main character.  Mort, who complains that he’s not an ordinary human being living an ordinary human life.  He’s got a super awesome thing going for him, given that he’s Death’s actual apprentice, and he wants to be normal and boring?  By the time he makes this complaint, he’s already messed up reality and, frankly, a very easy job by being a lovestruck twit over a girl whose eyes he met exactly once across a crowded room—just before her father was brutally murdered.  He’s clearly already the king of bad decision-making.  It’s baffling that he wants to be even more boring, too.

We’ve got so many cool and interesting characters that we could have focused on instead!  Actual, literal Death!  Ysabell, his immortally teenage daughter, who’s been sixteen for thirty-five years!  We’ve even got Albert, a formerly great and terrible wizard so terrified of death (and Death) that he chose to become Death’s eternal servant rather than die!  Any one of those would make a cool as hell main character.  We could have had it all, but instead we focus on a dunderheaded teenager, distracted by hormones and totally lacking in common sense.

I get that Mort is acting as a sort of audience surrogate, coming from a vanilla human background, learning as he goes, and only just beginning to move in the occult and magical circles.  But I would be about one hundred million times more interested in following Ysabell’s journey from normal human orphan to the never-aging daughter of Death, both rescued and trapped by her father in his land outside of reality, where time never moves and there’s no one to interact with except the stories of the outside world as they write themselves in the library.

She’s a cool goth romantic trapped in the body of a sixteen-year-old for decades.  Her favorite thing to do is read real, historical accounts of love stories where everyone dies horribly.  Death is her dad and why is this book not about her?

Mort, I’d argue, doesn’t really get interesting himself until he and Death start picking up some of each other’s traits.  And even then, if Mort-going-inhuman is cool, it’s overshadowed entirely by Death becoming a person rather than simply an anthropomorphic personification.  It’s, just, damn.  Death’s arc is beautiful and poignant and has lasting implications for the Discworld. Meanwhile, Mort’s whole…thing…will soon be fridged so that his daughter, Susan Sto Helit, can begin her reign as unstoppable badass and also queen of my heart.

Susan is great.  On second thought, I wish this book was about Susan.

Conceptually, everything about this story is wonderful.  I love the plot elements, the concept itself is so unique and executed well, and Mort does an amazing job of setting up the rest of the Death series within the Discworld.  It’s impossible to read Mort and not think about what it means to be a person—recognizing that everyone must and will die, that there’s no rhyme or reason to it, but also knowing that fighting back against that inevitability is built into us on a fundamental level.

Not yet.  Not today. Fairness might not matter; justice might not matter.  But part of what makes us human is that we think they should.  We want them to.  

And, by the end of Mort, Death agrees.

Part of the reason I keep coming back to Mort is that I do like seeing the seeds of what Death will become in later Discworld books. Mort, Ysabell, and Albert—and eventually Susan as well—all give Death the experience and the space to become more than what he was meant to be.  Rather than just an anthropomorphic personification, just a thing, Death becomes a person.  He has wants and desires and needs, and he acts on them, sometimes despite the fact that it causes problems with The Duty—his literal, actual reason to exist.  He grows and changes.  He cares.

Compared to the Death we see in The Colour of Magic, who seems relentlessly antagonistic to poor Rincewind—who implies, several times over, that he is actually, actively, trying to kill people himself—the Death we meet at the beginning of Mort is already a relief. He’s perfectly neutral, not threatening at all.  He’s an entity who performs a necessary service without any sort of emotion at all.  But by the end of Mort, the Death we see is—well, I find him flat-out comforting.

It’s the little things.  He goes fishing.  He makes jokes, even if they’re creepy and morbid and so specific to his field that most people don’t understand them at all.  He likes cats.  He’s a good cook.

[Death’s Glory, by Paul Kidby, off his website. Shit, I love his official Discworld art. This, I think, shows his attempt at making a fishing lure that Pratchett describes in a way that seems—nightmarish at best.]

And it’s the big things, too.  Death makes mistakes.  He plays hooky from his work, which is a bit more impressive when you remember that it’s the literal reason for his existence.  He knows right from wrong, and when it comes down to it, I think it’s less important that he chooses to do what’s right over the letter of the law (though I also appreciate that he does), and more important that he can choose at all.

“THERE IS NO JUSTICE,” Death likes to say, “JUST ME.” But when Death is a person, and on top of that, a good person, it almost feels like the same thing.

You have to love the see-saw of Mort and Death going wrong in equal but opposite ways, both of them fascinating (and horrifying). Mort starts losing his humanity as he picks up aspects of Death, leaving him with more and more of the power and knowledge, but none of the steadiness and impartiality that Death has shown so far. And as Death gains humanity, gains personhood, he starts to feel and to understand those feelings.  

It’s beautiful to see, but it’s also desperately sad.  I think it’s almost cruel to give an emotional range to an undying being who must be there for the end of every life, who must be alone for most of time.

But he gets the good things out of existence, too. Over the course of the Death books, he seems to think it’s worth it more often than it’s not.  So it’s a good thing that even after everything’s sorted out and the humans have been given back their normal lives, Death keeps what he has taken.

One of my favorite quotes:

“WHAT IS IT CALLED WHEN YOU FEEL WARM AND CONTENT AND WISH THINGS WOULD STAY THAT WAY?  ‘I guess you’d call it happiness,’ said Harga.  Inside the tiny, cramped kitchen, strata’d with the grease of decades, Death spun and whirled, chopping, slicing and flying.  His skillet flashed through the fetid steam.  He’d opened the door to the cold night air, and a dozen neighborhood cats had strolled in, attracted by the bowls of milk and meat—some of Harga’s best, if he’d known—that had been strategically placed around the floor. Occasionally Death would pause in his work and scratch one of them behind the ears.  ‘Happiness,’ he said, and puzzled at the sound of his own voice.”

While Death moves more and more towards being a person, Mort goes the opposite way, and I, reluctantly, have to agree he’s right to give it all up and go back to being purely human.  As conceptually cool and interesting as it is to be apprenticed to Death, to be more powerful and more real than any other living person, people aren’t meant to live like that, and certainly not meant to live forever.  Mort understands that.

As Death says, “YOU COULD HAVE HAD ETERNITY.”  

And in reply: “‘I know,’ said Mort.  ‘I’ve been very lucky.’”

Honestly, in the course of writing this all out, I’ve almost talked myself back around to really loving this book.  It’s got everything we all want from a Discworld novel: exquisitely crafted and delivered puns, punchy and memorable quotes, unique and well-written characters in a unique and well-crafted setting, a perfect blend of humorous absurdity and heart-wrenching sincerity.  And unlike the first few Discworld books (especially The Colour of Magic, but I’d include all of the previous three novels), Pratchett is clinging less to established High Fantasy tropes and relying more on Discworld-specific flavor. Ankh-Morpork feels more and more like a real place with every visit, and even the other regions of the Disc come across less as never-explored, baffling and bizarre foreign lands (Here There Be Dragons!) and more as places that really do exist, even if we haven’t seen them personally just yet.

And, if nothing else, Mort is so, so important to the rest of the Discworld books from this point on because it establishes exactly what and who Death is on the Discworld.  He’s a person.  He is, at his core, good.  And maybe, as Death says, “THERE IS NO JUSTICE, JUST ME,” but I think it’s incredibly reassuring while reading the series to know that no matter how badly things go wrong, no matter how much danger our Discworld heroes are in or how nerve-wracking things get, the absolute worst thing that could happen is that they end up in Death’s hands.  And Death will treat them as they deserve.

I will always appreciate Mort for that peace of mind.  (And I can appreciate Mort for it, too, even if I still want to grab that ding-dong dumbass by the shoulders and just shake—ahem.  Sorry.)

* * * * * * * * * *

Side Notes:

I need everyone to read this quote about a party at the Patrician’s palace and join me in my confusion: “In fact some two hundred of the Patrician’s guests were now staggering and kicking their way through the Serpent Dance, a quaint Morporkian folkway which consisted of getting rather drunk, holding the waist of the person in front, and then wobbling and giggling uproariously in a long crocodile that wound through as many rooms as possible, preferably ones with breakables in, while kicking one leg vaguely in time with the beat, or at least in time with some other beat.”

Vetinari let them do WHAT

Sure, he’s not technically Vetinari yet, he’s never been named at all, but that’s still proto-Vetinari’s guests at proto-Vetinari’s house and he’s letting them do WHAT

Rincewind pops up briefly in this book, serving as an assistant to the Librarian.  Is this an important cameo?  No, probably not.  Does it make me smile down at my book like I’m seeing a long-absent friend, even if there’s only been one book so far in the series that does not include him? Absolutely, yes.  Hi, Rincewind!  Missed you, buddy!  See you in a minute, Sourcery is coming up next!

Ysabell and Mort have such a strange love story.

“‘I don’t want to get married to anyone yet,’ he added, suppressing a fleeting mental picture of the princess.  ‘And certainly not to you, no offense meant.’  ‘I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last man on the Disc,’ she said sweetly.”

“‘Obviously we shouldn’t get married, if only for the sake of the children.’  Mort nodded.”

“DAUGHTER, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.  WHY DID YOU AID THIS FOOL?  Ysabell curtsied nervously.  ‘I—love him, Father.  I think.’ ‘You do?’ said Mort, astonished.  ‘You never said!’  ‘There didn’t seem to be time,’ said Ysabell.”

Teenagers. Honestly.

We get a lot more discussion about belief and reality in this one—Mort himself kind of embodies the point as he becomes “more real” and begins to stroll through walls, or doors, or arrows.  Nobody can see Death wandering around the mundane world (with the exception of cats and the magical community) because nobody expects to see him; they don’t believe he’ll be there, and so they don’t see him.  Princess Keli died, according to history, so even though Mort “saved” her, history (and the population of her kingdom) start to write her out.  Belief = reality.  We change the world with the force of that belief.

Favorite Quotes:

“I?  KILL? said Death, obviously offended. CERTAINLY NOT.  PEOPLE GET KILLED, BUT THAT’S THEIR BUSINESS.  I JUST TAKE OVER FROM THEN ON.  AFTER ALL, IT’D BE A BLOODY STUPID WORLD IF PEOPLE GOT KILLED WITHOUT DYING, WOULDN’T IT?”

“Let’s just say that Ankh-Morpork is as full of life as an old cheese on a hot day, as loud as a curse in a cathedral, as bright as an oil slick, as colorful as a bruise and as full of activity, industry, bustle and sheer exuberant busyness as a dead dog on a termite mound.”

“‘How do you get all those coins?’ asked Mort.  IN PAIRS.”

“‘Are you going to send me home?’ he said.  Death reached down and swung him up behind the saddle.  BECAUSE YOU SHOWED COMPASSION?  NO.  I MIGHT HAVE DONE IF YOU HAD SHOWN PLEASURE.  BUT YOU MUST LEARN THE COMPASSION PROPER TO YOUR TRADE.  ‘What’s that?’  A SHARP EDGE.”

“They’re always telling people how much better it’s going to be when they’re dead.  We tell them it could be pretty good right here if only they’d put their minds to it.”

“It had been a long afternoon.  The mountaineer had held on to his icy handhold until the last moment and the execute had called Mort a lackey of the monarchist state.  Only the old lady of 103, who had gone to her reward surrounded by her sorrowing relatives, had smiled at him and said he was looking a little pale.”

“Logic would have told Mort that here was his salvation…Logic would have told him that interfering with the process a second time around would only make things worse. Logic would have said all that, if only Logic hadn’t taken the night off too.”

“‘Why did you have to save me?’  The answer worried him.  He thought about it as he squelched all the way home.  …As he lay shivering in bed it settled in his dreams like an iceberg. In the midst of his fever he muttered, ‘What did he mean, FOR LATER?’”

“‘I mean, friend or foe?’ he stuttered, trying to avoid Mort’s gaze.  ‘Which would you prefer?’ he grinned.  It wasn’t quite the grin of his master, but it was a pretty effective grin and didn’t have a trace of humor in it.  The guard sagged with relief, and stood aside.  ‘Pass, friend,’ he said.”

“The sword burned icy cold in his hand, dragging him on in a dance that would not end until there was nothing left alive.  And that time came, and Mort stood alone except for Death, who said, ‘A fine job, boy.’ And Mort said, MORT.”

“‘I think there’s something you ought to know,’ said the princess.  THERE IS? said Death.  (That was a cinematic trick adapted for print.  Death wasn’t talking to the princess.  He was actually in his study, talking to Mort.  But it was quite effective, wasn’t it?  It’s probably called a fast dissolve, or a crosscut/zoom. Or something.  An industry where a senior technician is called a Best Boy might call it anything.)”

[addictedforbooksquad]

P I C K (S)  O F  T H E  M O N T H: M A R C H

Shades of Magic series by V. E. Schwab

Make Me Bad by R. S. Grey

Mistborn Trilogy by Brandon Sanderson

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas

The Winner’s Trilogy by Marie Rutkoski

Text series by Teagan Hunter

Shades of Magic series by V.E. Schwab

Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, Magic

Synopsis:

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. Kell was raised in Arnes—Red London—and officially serves the Maresh Empire as an ambassador, traveling between the frequent bloody regime changes in White London and the court of George III in the dullest of Londons, the one without any magic left to see. Unofficially, Kell is a smuggler, servicing people willing to pay for even the smallest glimpses of a world they'll never see. It's a defiant hobby with dangerous consequences, which Kell is now seeing firsthand. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. She first robs him, then saves him from a deadly enemy, and finally forces Kell to spirit her to another world for a proper adventure. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

Why we love it:

thief turned pirate badass heroine

great premise with a storyline that felt very different

fabulous world-building with an interesting magic system

if you love London like us, there are four of them instead of one xD

full of morally gray characters!!!!!

don’t get attached to anyone

Trigger warnings: mind control, (mentions of) homophobia, character death

Make Me Bad by R.S. Grey

Genres: Romance, Contemporary, New Adult

Synopsis:

I was issued a warning: stay away from Ben Rosenberg. As Clifton Cove’s resident “king”, he thinks he’s entitled to anyone and anything. The trouble is, I’ve spent my whole life following the rules and playing it safe. I know what it feels like to be the good girl. I’m the police chief’s daughter and a librarian—for adorable children, no less. An all-nighter with a fictional hunk is about as exciting as my life gets until one day, fate decides to take pity on me and shove me straight into the path of Mr. Off-Limits himself. Just as I suspected, every inch of him promises to be my demise. Up close, he’s tall, menacing—a lawyer who looks like he’ll bite. A well-behaved girl would do as she’s told and avoid him at all costs, but I’m overdue for a little rebellion. So, I ignore the warning and throw caution to the wind. But Ben doesn’t just nudge me out of my comfort zone—he thrusts me into a dark corner and presses his hard body against mine, covering my mouth with his hand to ensure we don’t get caught sneaking around. In that moment, I finally understand why everyone thinks he’s going to ruin me. To him, this is all a game. He wants to tempt me with his dares and taunt me with his words. I should play along. After all, I asked him to make me bad. I just never thought he’d take his job quite so seriously...

Why we love it:

honestly the cutest thing ever

entertaining characters

friends to lovers done well

pretty angst-free (in a good way)

reading this book just makes you feel good

Trigger warnings: assault (one scene)

Mistborn Trilogy by Brandon Sanderson

Genres: Fantasy, High Fantasy, Adult

Synopsis:

In a world where ash falls from the sky, and mist dominates the night, an evil cloaks the land and stifles all life. The future of the empire rests on the shoulders of a troublemaker and his young apprentice. Together, can they fill the world with color once more? In Brandon Sanderson's intriguing tale of love, loss, despair and hope, a new kind of magic enters the stage — Allomancy, a magic of the metals.

Why we love it:

amazing world-building

unique and interesting magic system

lots of unexpected twists

the story follows different characters and their POVs

amazing, quality writing

Trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault (mentioned/suggested)

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas

Genres: Romance, Historical Romance, Regency

Synopsis:

A Devil's Bargain Easily the shyest Wallflower, Evangeline Jenner stands to become the wealthiest, once her inheritance comes due. Because she must first escape the clutches of her unscrupulous relatives, Evie has approached the rake Viscount St. Vincent with a most outrageous proposition: marriage! Sebastian's reputation is so dangerous that thirty seconds alone with him will ruin any maiden's good name. Still, this bewitching chit appeared, unchaperoned, on his doorstep to offer her hand. Certainly an aristocrat with a fine eye for beauty could do far worse. But Evie's proposal comes with a condition: no lovemaking after their wedding night. She will never become just another of the dashing libertine's callously discarded broken hearts—which means Sebastian will simply have to work harder at his seductions... or perhaps surrender his own heart for the very first time in the name of true love.

Why we love it:

our favourite book from the Wallflower series

Sebastian with his fallen angel looks has amazing growth in this book and he isn’t quite the villain he led us to believe

Evie, our shy timid Wallflower really comes into her own in this book when she decides to take her future into her own hands with an offer that Sebastian can’t refuse

wickedly sexy dialogues

their chemistry is off the charts !!!

LK is the reigning Queen of historical romance

Trigger warnings: (mentions of) domestic violence

The Winner’s Trilogy by Marie Rutkoski

Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, Romance

Synopsis:

Winning what you want may cost you everything you love... As a general’s daughter in a vast empire that revels in war and enslaves those it conquers, seventeen-year-old Kestrel has two choices: she can join the military or get married. But Kestrel has other intentions. One day, she is startled to find a kindred spirit in a young slave up for auction. Arin’s eyes seem to defy everything and everyone. Following her instinct, Kestrel buys him—with unexpected consequences. It’s not long before she has to hide her growing love for Arin. But he, too, has a secret, and Kestrel quickly learns that the price she paid for a fellow human is much higher than she ever could have imagined. Set in a richly imagined new world, The Winner’s Curse by Marie Rutkoski is a story of deadly games where everything is at stake, and the gamble is whether you will keep your head or lose your heart.

Why we love it:

angsty AF

awesome world-building

best character development

enemies to lovers trope YASSS

one of the best but underrated YA series

heroine who is written as both badass and feminine

Trigger warnings: slavery, violence, racism, attempted sexual assault

Text series by Teagan Hunter

Genres: Romance, Contemporary, New Adult

Synopsis:

A wrong number is supposed to be just that—a wrong number. Delete. Done. Do not continue to text. Do not flirt. A wrong number shouldn’t be the first person on your mind in the morning, or the last at night…and you’re definitely not supposed to talk them into buying a baby goat. Because that would be weird. When Zach Hastings and I get into a wrong-number mix-up, we don’t follow the rules. We keep texting and flirting, because he’s wicked funny and perfectly nerdy and a wonderful distraction. I’m not looking for love, and Zach definitely had the wrong number. But maybe… Maybe he’s the right guy.

Why we love it:

a series of four books but can be read as standalones

cute, funny and sexy aka the best romance combo

original formatting - lots of dialogue in text messages (which can be annoying to some but we found it refreshing)

roommates, second chance romance, forbidden romance - a mix of our fave tropes all in one series

Trigger warnings: n/a

[eddycurrents]

For the week of 17 September 2018

Quick Bits:

Amazing Spider-Man Annual #1 gives us an “untold tale” of Spider-Man shortly after Secret Wars while he still had the black costume from Saladin Ahmed, Gerry Brown, Lee Loughridge, and Joe Caramagna. It’s a nice bit of embellishment, giving us a look more at the reactions from the people around Peter and what the Venom symbiote was doing while he slept. The dark, moody art from Brown and Loughridge is perfect for this.

| Published by Marvel

Avengers #8 is a bit of a housekeeping issue from Jason Aaron, taking stock of what’s changed for this new incarnation of the team, putting together the status of the various members, and setting up the new status quo. It’s nice to see David Marquez and Justin Ponsor aboard for this arc, continuing the very high bar this volume is setting for art.

| Published by Marvel

Black Hammer: Age of Doom #5 answers all of the questions, with Jeff Lemire and Dean Ormston filling in all of the details in Lucy’s quest to find the missing heroes. It’s an interesting, and satisfying, revelation that sets up an even bigger picture and possible looming threat.

| Published by Dark Horse

Bloodborne #5 begins a new arc, returning to the city, and focusing on a scientific and religious inquiry into the nature of the affliction besetting the world. Wonderful art from Piotr Kowalski and Brad Simpson.

| Published by Titan

Burnouts #1 isn’t a bad start from Dennis Culver, Geoffo, Dave Dwonch, and Lauren Perry, riffing on the teen alien invasion vibe of things like The Faculty. The premise of needing to be high or otherwise intoxicated to see the true threat is an interesting one, leaving an obvious out as to whether or not it’s real, but this issue largely takes it at face value. 

| Published by Image

Captain America Annual #1 is very well done. Tini Howard, Chris Sprouse, Ron Lim, Karl Story, Walden Wong, Scott Hanna, Jesus Aburtov, Erick Arciniega, Israel Silva, and Joe Caramagna give us a story set deep into World War 2 of Cap and Bucky behind German lines, helping a group of civilians who escaped from Stutthof.

| Published by Marvel

Death or Glory #5 sets fire to Glory’s life quite literally. This entire series so far has been damned good, moving at a breakneck pace pushing the characters harder and further with each subsequent issue. Rick Remender, Bengal, and Rus Wooton continue to deliver.

| Published by Image / Giant Generator

Dick Tracy: Dead or Alive #1 is a curious thing, embracing the odd stylistic choices of Chester Gould’s characters with Rich Tommaso and Mike Allred’s art, and the kind of throwback tone of Lee & Mike Allred’s script, but through the use of a cellphone it doesn’t seem to be a period piece. Still, it’s an entertaining beginning to this mini.

| Published by IDW

Ether: The Copper Golems #5 is the bittersweet end to this mini, setting up a new problem for Boone and co. to face in the third series, but in doing so putting him in an even more tragic situation, both in the present and in the flashback back-up. Matt Kindt & David Rubín have bottled magic with this series and I can’t recommend it highly enough.

| Published by Dark Horse

GI Joe: A Real American Hero - Silent Option #1 begins a new limited series following Bombstrike and her team’s investigation of the missing Helix. It’s a bit bloodier and more brutal than the mothership series, but given the subject of human trafficking, it’s kind of understandable. Larry Hama, Netho Diaz, Alisson Rodrigues, Jagdish Kumar, Vinicius Townsend, and Neil Uyetake put together a decent start here. There’s also a great back-up filling us in on Helix’s past from Ryan Ferrier & Kenneth Loh.

| Published by IDW

Hack/Slash: Resurrection #11 is the conclusion to the “Return to Haverhill” arc and it continues with the usual offbeat humour that Tini Howard has brought to the title. Mixing the horror with wacky hijinks.

| Published by Image

Ice Cream Man #7 might be one of the more horrifying issues of the series, telling the tale of a young girl coming to terms with the death of her best friend. That story alone is enough to pick up the issue, but it also brings back more of the ongoing story of the Ice Cream Man’s trials as well, giving us a bit more interconnectivity of what are otherwise mostly standalone tales.

| Published by Image

Immortal Hulk #6 sees Al Ewing working to put the disparate pieces of the run so far together, along with revealing at least one group of antagonists dogging Banner’s heels, and working Hulk back into the broader world of the Marvel Universe to deal with the ramifications that have been hovering since Civil War 2. Surprisingly, none of it is particularly confusing, which is a testament to how Ewing is laying this out. Also, really nice guest art from Lee Garbett (with colours from Paul Mounts).

| Published by Marvel

Impossible Incorporated #1 is a new all ages mini from JM DeMatteis and Mike Cavallaro. I have fond memories of their previous collaboration The Life & Times of Savior 28, so came into this with some fairly high expectations. They were exceeded. The premise for this series taps into the same family of adventurers dynamic of the Fantastic Four and Challengers of the Unknown, and it yields some interesting characters, weird landscapes, and phenomenal art.

| Published by IDW

Infinity Wars: Soldier Supreme #1 is the first of these Infinity Warps tie-in minis to the overarching Infinity Wars saga, blending together two of Marvel’s heroes in this new reality. In this case, Captain America and Doctor Strange. I’m not sure how much impact these will ultimately have on the event, but it’s a fun diversion. Gerry Duggan, Adam Kubert, Matthew Wilson, and Clayton Cowles deliver an entertaining beginning to this story, laying out Stephen Rogers’ origin and showcasing a number of other amalgamated heroes and a rather interesting villain. Kubert and Wilson’s art is definitely more than worth the price of admission.

| Published by Marvel

The Life of Captain Marvel #3 delivers more heartfelt and strange complications for Carol Danvers. I’m really enjoying the drama that Margaret Stohl is creating in this series, it’s really been injecting a real element of humanity in Carol that’s been missing for years.

| Published by Marvel

Mr. & Mrs. X #3 gives us an explanation for the egg that everybody and their bird-brained aunt are fighting over. This development is definitely very interesting for the cosmic side of things.

| Published by Marvel

Olivia Twist #1 is an updating of Charles Dickens’ Oliver Twist, gender-bent and worked into the future, by Darin Strauss, Adam Dalva, Emma Vieceli, Lee Loughridge, and Sal Cipriano. The premise works quite well adapted to a dystopian future, with the protections of society broken down and oppression at an all time high. Although this is set in a future Britain, it’s easy to see similar conditions in America today. What really brings the book together is the artwork from Vieceli and Loughridge. 

| Published by Dark Horse / Berger Books

Patience! Conviction! Revenge! #1 is the beginning to what looks to be another beautiful sci-fi epic, starting out with a bit of a western feel, before moving on to the city. I quite like the voice that Patrick Kindlon gives to the protagonist, Renny, as he doesn’t seem to shut up. Also, the artwork from Marco Ferrari and Patrizia Comino is wonderful. Ferrari has a style that reminds me of Sean Gordon Murphy and Devmalya Pramanik and it perfectly suits a lived-in future.

| Published by AfterShock

Return of Wolverine #1 is not a terrible comic. In fact the artwork from Steve McNiven, Jay Leisten, and Laura Martin is very, very good. McNiven seems to be channelling Barry Windsor-Smith for the artwork and it’s perfect. The action and page compositions are wonderful. I can also say that the story, dialogue and such, from Charles Soule is not bad. I’m not sure if I like the implied idea of pulling Wolverine’s history from him, putting the memory genie back in the bottle when we already know his Origin, is a good idea, but his issues with Persephone and Soteira are at least interesting.

What ruins this comic, however, like the Hunt for Wolverine: Dead Ends issue, is that it renders the entire Hunt for Wolverine event superfluous. It doesn’t respect the readers’ time or money, showing that Hunt for Wolverine didn’t build to anything. There’s absolutely nothing in this comic that necessitates having read anything before it. That’s good for new readers, but it’s a crappy ploy from Marvel that manufactured an empty event that seems like its sole purpose was to bilk the customer. I feel terrible saying that, since for the most part the mini-series weren’t bad in isolation, but as a whole, it just seems like a marketing stunt. When it comes to a character like Wolverine, who has previously been associated with the idea of market oversaturation, it’s just worse. 

From Marvel Legacy through to now, it doesn’t feel like there’s been any guiding hand. It doesn’t feel like there’s been any coherence between any of the appearances. It just feels like Marvel turning to some of their worst tendencies in making this past year or so a marketing ploy, tarnishing something that possibly could have been special, and ruining the return of Wolverine. Wolverine’s still dead, Marvel’s just pimping a corpse.

| Published by Marvel

Seven to Eternity #11 checks in on Adam’s family at the farm while he’s hanging around with the Mud King. Like every issue, beautiful, stunning artwork from Jerome Opeña and Matt Hollingsworth, somehow outdoing themselves with the brilliant colour schemes and impressive character designs. Also, I love the biting, almost subtle, humour that Rick Remender employs for the Mud King’s dialogue.

| Published by Image / Giant Generator

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #86 begins the Earth Protection Force’s assault on Burnow Island, the new home to the Triceratons and Utroms. The action depicted by a returning Dave Wachter (with colours by Ronda Pattison) is very nice, even as we get some interesting moral and ethical hemming and hawing from both the Turtles and Burnow’s defenders as they choose whether or not to release their war criminals to help fight against the EPF. This feels like the beginning of something very heavy.

| Published by IDW

Thor #5 resumes the King Thor story from the first issue, in the far-flung future, with a reunion between Thor and Logan. It’s not quite as bonkers a story from Jason Aaron as the opening Niffleheim arc, but it’s certainly up there. I almost get the impression that Aaron and Donny Cates are seeing how far they push the cosmic envelope at Marvel right now, between their respective series. In any event, it’s led to some great storytelling. Especially when you add guest artist Christian Ward, who just makes this a must buy.

| Published by Marvel

Venom #6 is a not-so-subtle reminder that the art team of Ryan Stegman, JP Mayer, Frank Martin, and Clayton Cowles are absolute beasts. Every issue of this series has been impeccably crafted so far and I swear that this one ups the ante. Gorgeous work from the team.

| Published by Marvel

West Coast Avengers #2 is more ridiculous fun. If you liked the first issue, this is more of that, with some even more over-the-top shenanigans with the team, as they try to get to the bottom of BRODOK. Kelly Thompson’s dialogue and humour here are a highlight, reminding me of some of best of Keith Giffen and JM DeMatteis’ work on the bwahaha era of the Justice League. A book that doesn’t take itself too seriously is a nice balm these days. Also, gorgeous artwork again from Stefano Caselli and Tríona Farrell.

| Published by Marvel

Other Highlights: Amazing Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows #23, Aphrodite V #3, Black Badge #2, Bonehead #4, Britannia: Lost Eagles of Rome #3, By Night #4, Coda #5, Coyotes #6, Crude #6, Curse Words #16, Days of Hate #8, Doctor Strange #5, DuckTales #12, Edge of Spider-Geddon #3, Encounter #6, Evolution #10, Flavor #6, Hit-Girl #8, Infinity 8 #6, Jeepers Creepers #5, John Wick #3, Kick-Ass #7, Lost City Explorers #4, Luke Cage #2, Lumberjanes #54, Mae #9, Mata Hari #5, Multiple Man #4, Quantum & Woody #10, Rick & Morty Presents Sleepy Gary #1, Robots vs. Princesses #2, Rumble #7, Secret Agent Deadpool #2, Shadowman #7, Star Wars #54, Star Wars: Lando - Double or Nothing #5, Stellar #4, Strangers in Paradise XXV #6, Summit #9, Superb #13, Sword of Ages #5, Usagi Yojimbo: The Hidden #6, Vagrant Queen #4, Venom: First Host #4, Witchfinder: Gates of Heaven #5

Recommended Collections: Beowulf, Cable - Volume 3: Past Fears, Coda - Volume 1, Cold War - Volume 1, Descender - Volume 6: War Machine, The Mighty Thor - Volume 4: War Thor, Ninjak vs. the Valiant Universe, Skybourne, Spider-Gwen - Volume 6: Life of Gwen Stacy, Venom - Volume 4: Nativity

d. emerson eddy enjoys doing stuff some times. And things other times. Stuff and things.

[wordsintimeandspace]

Intimacy

Although the Doctor is asexual and Rose is not, they found a balance in their relationship they’re both comfortable with. Together, they explore new ways to be intimate.

Tentoo/Rose, rated T, around 1.5k words. Read this on AO3!

This story is set a bit after More than Okay, but it can be read as a standalone. This was based on this “smut-free taking a bath together” prompt by @doctorroseprompts and I took the chance to include some ace!Doctor, since this was also requested at @timepetalscollective recently.

Rose Tyler should’ve been miserable, really. She’d been on her feet all day, was soaked to the bone, and somewhere in the middle of chasing aliens and saving the Earth she’d pulled a muscle in her neck. All she wanted was a bubble bath and a cuddle with the Doctor. But here she was, waiting in a dark alley for Torchwood to arrive so they could clean up the mess the alien she’d been tracking down had left. She had teleported the Cyr back to its ship, but the whole street was still covered with the purple goo it had emitted. At least the rain had already washed it off her clothes.

But all this didn’t matter. A bright smile bloomed on her lips as a black van pulled up and the Doctor hopped out. His face lit up as soon as he laid eyes on her. Rose’s heart skipped a beat. Before she knew it they were both running towards each other and she found herself in a bone-crushing hug. The Doctor’s laugh echoed in her ears as he picked her up, spinning her around. Rose held him tight, not letting go even as he set her feet back to the ground. Rain continued to pour down on them, but neither of them cared.

“All right?” the Doctor finally asked as he pulled back. His gaze swept over her.

Rose smiled. “Yep. And you?”

“Oh, perfect.” The Doctor’s eyes gleamed with pride. “I saw you handle the Cyr on the footage. You were amazing.”

“You weren’t so bad yourself,” Rose said, brushing her fingers down his lapels. “Nice work on reprogramming the autopilot of their spaceship.”

“We’re still a good team, eh?”

“The best.” Rose grinned, and finally pulled him down for a kiss. The Doctor let out a sigh of relief as their lips met. Rose wrapped her arms around his neck, the need to feel him close overwhelming. It had been their first real alien invasion since they had arrived back in Pete’s world together, and although Rose knew it had been necessary to split up, she hoped she wouldn’t have to let the Doctor out of her sight anytime soon.

Someone cleared his throat behind them. Reluctantly, they broke apart and turned to see Pete standing under a large, black umbrella. He smiled and nodded approvingly when they faced him.

“Great work, you two. We sent the Cyr back to their home planet. They should be out of the solar system soon. Thanks for helping out, Doctor.”

The Doctor pulled Rose a little closer to his side, his arm around her back. “No problem. Anytime, really.”

“Well, the offer still stands if you ever want a permanent position with us. We could need someone like you.”

Rose looked up to see the Doctor grimace.

“I think I’m good with my job at the university for now,” he said, rubbing his neck. “But I appreciate the offer, Pete.”

“All right,” Pete said with a nod, before his eyes settled on Rose. “Agent Tyler, I expect the report by tomorrow afternoon. But for now, you should probably head home and change into some dry clothes. Your mother will have a go at me if you turn up for dinner on Sunday with a cold.”

Rose cracked a smile and hugged her father goodbye. Relieved that the paperwork could wait another day, she and the Doctor got into a waiting car. They chatted quietly as the driver brought them home, sitting in the backseat next to each other, their hands entwined.

Rose was shivering by the time they were finally back in their flat. She grimaced as she peeled off her soaked jacket. It clung uncomfortably to her skin. Rubbing her sore neck, Rose turned towards the Doctor.

“I need a bath,” she announced. “D’you want to shower first?”

The Doctor ran a hand through his hair and hesitantly met her gaze. “Or I could… join you?”

Rose’s eyes went wide. That was not what she had expected to hear. They did share an intimate relationship, but the Doctor had never indicated that he wanted to involve any kind of nakedness, even if it wasn’t sexual. She didn’t realize that she was gaping at him until the Doctor blushed and backtracked frantically.

“Or not. Sorry. Stupid question. I know you like some, err, alone time in the bath. Forget I asked.”

“No, it’s…” Rose cringed. “That’s not what I meant. I’m just surprised, that’s all. Didn’t think that would be something you’d consider.”

“So you wouldn’t mind? If I did join you?”

He looked so nervous that Rose quickly crossed the distance between them and leaned up to peck his lips. “Not at all. I’d like that. I never really wanted to ask before. Wasn’t sure you’d be comfortable with that.”

“With you? Always,” the Doctor said, his voice low and rumbling. “I know you’ll respect my boundaries even if I’m naked in your bathtub, all at your disposal.”

He winked at her and Rose slapped his arm, laughing. “Stop that, or I might need some alone time after all.”

“Well, we can’t have that. Not right now.” The Doctor threaded his fingers through hers and gently tugged her into the direction of the bathroom. “Come on then!”

The Doctor drew the bath while Rose wiped her face clean of any remaining makeup and peeled off her wet clothes. When she was done, the Doctor was already sitting in a large pile of bubbles. He had his eyes closed and his head thrown back, looking completely at ease. The thought that he trusted her enough to enjoy this experience with her was exhilarating. Rose couldn’t stop a smile spreading on her lips.

The Doctor opened his eyes, regarding her with a soft smile. “You’re beautiful,” he said as Rose approached the bathtub. She bit her lip, blushing under his gaze. She went to sit on the opposite end of the bathtub, keeping some distance between them, but instead the Doctor opened his arms for her. It was too tempting to resist. Rose slid into the tub and settled between his legs. Instantly, the Doctor wrapped an arm around her middle to pull her closer. When her back was flush against his naked chest, the Doctor pressed a kiss to her shoulder.

“All right?” he murmured against her skin, his thumb drawing circles on her stomach. Rose let out a breath and finally relaxed into his arms, snuggling closer.

“Perfect,” she grinned. Closing her eyes, she let the hot water and the Doctor’s gentle touches calm her after the eventful day. A long time ago, she wouldn’t have thought that sharing a bath with the person she loved could be anything but sexual, but being with the Doctor proved her perceptions of relationships wrong over and over again. This wasn’t about sex, it was simply about being close to each other. This was a whole new level of intimacy she had never shared with any of her previous boyfriends.

“Penny for your thoughts,” the Doctor said, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Rose let out a hum and turned until she could press her lips to his.

“Just thinking about how good this feels,” she said, running her fingers down the Doctor’s arm until she could link their fingers together. The Doctor squeezed her hand.

“I agree. We should do this more often.”

“Would’ve asked you ages ago if I’d known you’d like that.”

“Well, maybe I wouldn’t have been comfortable with it right from the beginning. But now? Definitely yes.”

Rose was quiet for a minute, contemplating his words.

“What changed, then?”

The Doctor let out a laugh. “I know you’re okay with not doing these things.”

“What?” Rose frowned at him. “I need you to explain that.”

“Knowing that you’re okay with not doing this is exactly what makes it okay. It takes the pressure off. There are no expectations, and I know it would be perfectly all right to change my mind, if I ever reach a point where I’m not comfortable.”

Turning in his arms, Rose gave him a tongue-touched smile. “Mostly all right, maybe. I would still be a little disappointed if you’d jump out of the tub right now.”

The Doctor smiled down at her, his eyes shining. “Understandable. But I know you wouldn’t hold it against me.”

“Never,” Rose said with determination. Leaning down, the Doctor pressed his lips to hers.

“And answers like that, Rose Tyler,” he murmured against her lips, “is what makes all this okay. Does this make sense?”

“Yeah.” Rose’s heart skipped a beat at the love and adoration in the Doctor’s eyes. She trailed her fingers along his cheek, watching his eyes flutter shut. Perfectly content, she settled back into his arms, her head against his chest. She knew this was all she ever needed from their relationship: being intimate with the Doctor, in whatever way he was comfortable with, no matter if it didn’t involve sex. She didn’t want it any other way.

[hypedbooktalks]

A Court of Thorns and Roses - Sarah J. Maas

Rating -  8/10

Publisher - Bloomsbury

About -  Feyre is a huntress. She thinks nothing of slaughtering a wolf to capture its prey. But, like all mortals, she fears what lingers mercilessly beyond the forest. And she will learn that taking the life of a magical creature comes at a high price... Imprisoned in an enchanted court in her enemy's kingdom, Feyre is free to roam but forbidden to escape. Her captor's body bears the scars of fighting, and his face is always masked - but his piercing stare draws her ever closer. As Feyre's feeling for Tamlin begin to burn through every warning she's been told about his kind, an ancient, wicked shadow grows. Feyre must find a way to break a spell, or lose her heart forever.

Review -

Lovely tale ! To be honest. If I had to rate this book only after reading half of it, I would rate it 1/5. The start was so slow and so many pointless chapters. It was stretched way more than necessary. BUT the story picked up and it turned out great ! SPOILER I love Beauty and the Beast ! And since it's retelling, I was sure to love it. But I had my doubts at the beginning of the book. The moment when Feyre was about to say " I Love you " to Tamlin but didn't. I already knew she is gonna regret it. The reason later turned out way too huge ! I think there is a major FLAW in the story though. For someone as evil as Amarantha, why on earth would she give trial to Feyre ? Why risk anything at all ? She could have destroyed Feyre as soon as she saw her. Why bother with anything at all ? But I guess there is answer to it if we force ourselves to answer it. The fact that she wanted Tamlin and therefore she wanted Tamlin to see how pathetic humans are and how their love means nothing. And there is the fact that Feyre actually killed those two Faeries ! I just couldn't believe it ! What in the world ? This will obviously have a impact on the story later. A good standalone ? I already bought the second part in the sequel, so I will continue this series. But truly, this is a complete book. This really didn't a sequel. WE can TOTALLY ignore King of Hyburn. This book had a great ending. Rysand has my curiosity. WHAT exactly does he want though ? I can't imagine. Perhaps Feyre herself ? Argh. Now that's a good reason to read a sequel ! Feyre's character was amazing. A great protagonist of the story. A strong female character exalting feminism perfectly. A strong huntress who cares so much for her family and WORKS for them while they lazily sit around for various reasons. I also love the fact she loves to paint ! I wished that she was an avid reader too but Sarah J Mass figured that bit perfectly ! Indeed if she is so good at hunting, she has to be bad at other things. But I reckon she would have read a lot of books by the end of third book which might even help her !

[xjoonchildx]

guilty | knj x reader | chapter two: incheon mall tube tops

summary: as the man at the top, kim namjoon has almost everything he wants. almost. could a familiar face from the past change his future?

pairing: namjoon x reader

genre: mafia AU, pining, eventual smut

rating: 18+

word count: 4.5K

notes: i really hope you guys are enjoying namjoon’s story! i think there will only be one more chapter after this.  and like a true unfocused writer i started daydreaming about a yoongi one-shot to go with it? gah, nevermind.  i really hope you guys like this and i’d love to hear how you feel one way or another.  a huge thanks to my amazing beta @hobi-gif​ who does a hell of a lot more than just find typos.  and all of my love has to go out to @ladyartemesia​ @ppersonna​ @taetaewonderland​ because all three of you are so much more than tumblr friends.

this fic is a continuation of the Guarded Series but can be read as a standalone piece.

Chapter 01 | 02 | 03 | Epilogue

**********************

It didn’t matter how hard you tried to hide your sadness, Namjoon saw it.

It didn’t matter how many hushed calls you tried to sneak, or how many smiles you tried to force -- Namjoon saw right through your act from the very beginning.  He’d seen enough to know that you were facing some kind of personal battle. He understood enough about you to know that you were far too private to bring it up or ask for help.

He should have asked.

The question sat heavy on the tip of his tongue for weeks.  He should have asked on the days he would spot you at your desk, fingers pressed to your temples in frustration.  Or on the days when he would catch you staring out the window, mind a million miles away.

He didn’t.

Instead, he let himself be driven to distraction by the way your blouses fit perfectly against the lines of your body. The way your pencil skirts hugged the curve of your hips. How soft your hair looked pulled into the low, loose knot you favored.

He found himself stumbling over his words when you’d quietly slip into meetings to deliver an urgent message or he’d drift off in the middle of conversations just because he’d caught sight of you outside his office door.

So it wasn’t long before what started as a preoccupation turned into a full-blown fixation.

You’d turn up at his request, poised and professional as always -- and he’d be lost in thought, defiling you a thousand different ways in his head.  Fantasizing about getting his hands on you, his mouth on you, his teeth on you.

You didn’t deserve that.

That’s why Namjoon kept his mouth shut -- stuck in a maddening cycle of wanting to help you, wanting to know you, just wanting you.

All of it made him feel guilty as hell.

*********************

The new girl is a fucking disaster.

Namjoon has yet to figure out how she manages to be underfoot at the most inconvenient times and simultaneously nowhere to be found when she’s needed.  She misplaces files and misses calls and forgets assigned tasks altogether. He’s lost track of the number of times he’s passed her desk to find her taking pictures of herself; lips pouted, angle skewed.

Two weeks ago, she was probably selling tube tops at Incheon Mall and now she’s playing gatekeeper to one of the most powerful men in Seoul.  So it’s not her fault that she’s woefully unprepared for this job.

And it’s not her fault that she’s not you.

Namjoon has spent the better part of the morning debating the call he’s about to make, picking up the phone and setting it back down at least half a dozen times.  But he’s at the end of his rope, running out of patience and options.

So he swallows his pride and picks up the phone just one more time.  

You answer on the first ring.

“Mister Kim.”

God, he’s missed the sound of your voice.  

“Good morning,” he starts carefully, clearing his throat. “I’m certain you have a lot on your plate but I was wondering if you could come sit with the new girl for a few minutes.  She’s struggling a bit.”  

The line is quiet for a moment and Namjoon can practically hear your thoughts on the other end of the line.  The ones that say well that’s what you get for replacing your perfectly competent assistant with a child.

“I left notes,” is the quiet reply that comes instead.

“You did.”

“Detailed notes. Written, detailed notes.”

“Yes,” Namjoon agrees, rubbing his fingers across his mouth.  “I’m certain they were quite detailed.  It’s just that she’s having trouble following those notes because --”  

“Because she can’t read?”

Namjoon cringes.  Any small hope he had that you weren’t taking your reassignment personally dies with the abrupt delivery of that statement.

“Apparently not,” he admits lamely.

He hears the quiet sigh you take in before answering.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

*************************

There’s a moment -- just after Seokjin has walked through his office door -- when Namjoon catches a glimpse of you.

You are leaned over the new girl’s desk, lips pursed, pointing something out on the computer screen.  Namjoon freezes when you look up and lock eyes with him just as the door swings shut.

Christ, is he ever going to be able to look at you without feeling like he’s had the wind knocked out of him?

He turns to find Seokjin staring at him, one brow raised.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” Namjoon exhales, shoving a hand through his hair as he walks back to his desk.  “I’m fine. You said you wanted to talk about something?”

“I do,” Seokjin starts, helping himself to a seat. “Two things, actually. Both pertaining to the amazing new assistant you so generously gifted me.”

Namjoon’s nails dig into the palm of his hand.

“Go on.”

“Apparently she’s some kind of whiz with numbers,” Seokjin continues, unbothered by his strained response.  “I gave her a few of the books to look over and she already found a couple of our guys in the Songpa district skimming off the top. I’ll bet there’s even more where that came from and she’ll find it.  She’s got a good eye.”

Namjoon feels pride stir in his chest.  Yet again, you exceed expectations.  

“Send Yoongi and Hoseok to Songpa tonight,” he murmurs.  “I’ll be curious to hear what kind of explanation our friends come up with for their lapses in accounting.”

Seokjin nods.

“Will do.  So the other thing --” he pauses for a beat, like he’s trying to figure out how to carefully deliver what he has to say next.  “I know you asked me to try and figure out what’s going on with her and I think I have.  You’re right, she’s struggling with some personal issues.”

Namjoon leans forward in his chair, body rigid.

“Let me hear it.”

*************************

YOU

The new girl is a fucking disaster.

You have yet to figure out why she can’t work the printers or can’t read a simple spreadsheet when you know for fact she knows how to beam her selfies all the way to the goddamned moon.

It’s infuriating.

Just like it’s infuriating to see her seated at what should be your desk, doing what should be your job, working for the man who should be your boss.  

Figure shit out, you’d love to tell her.  Sink or swim, that’s how the real world works.  

The idea of letting her fail so dismally that Namjoon has no choice but to beg for you back is tempting.  But then he’d picked up the phone to personally ask you to help.

And apparently you are incapable of denying that man anything.

You’ve stayed late every day this week to review the spreadsheets Seokjin has given you to audit because of the extra time you’ve had to put aside to help the new girl navigate foreign concepts like filing and scheduling.

The numbers tell an interesting story.

The rumors about Kim Namjoon’s skill as a businessman don’t give him enough credit.  Money is pouring into the Gajog, hand over fist, from every major district in the city.  Billions of won flow into the organization from legitimate and not as legitimate revenue streams alike.  Combine the numbers and Kim Namjoon controls an empire worth trillions.

You stare at the sums and your mind flips back to your unexpected pay raise. It’s no wonder Namjoon can afford to be so generous.

It’s no wonder so many of the street-level men who work for him seem to be helping themselves to more than their fair share.  

It took you a few days to identify the patterns, comparing the new intake sheets to the old ones, but once you did the missing money practically jumped off the page.  Just a few audits in and you’d already been able to find at least 119 million won unaccounted for.

The Kim Namjoon you know is reserved and unflappable -- but this is information that’s bound to piss even him off.  

What is a man like him like when he’s angry?

You shudder at the thought.

Before long, the night sky stares back at you from the window across from your desk and you decide it’s well past time you went home.  You sort everything into neat piles and leave yourself organized notes before packing up to leave.

***************************

There’s no answer from your mother when you call to her from the hallway.  

You frown as you make your way to her bedroom, worry melting away when you find her asleep in her chair.  Her head is bent at a sharp angle, and you immediately move to help her prop her up.

Her eyes open to slits, unfocused from sleep and medication.

“Ttal,” she whispers, grimacing as she straightens out the crick in her neck.

“Eomma,” you whisper in a hushed rebuke. “We’ve talked about this.  You can’t fall asleep in this chair, it’s terrible for you.”

She nods slowly, pointing to a glass of water on her nightstand.  You hand it to her, but it wobbles in her weak grip and you take hold of it to help her drink before setting it aside.

“I’m hurting tonight,” she admits.  

“I know,” you sigh, heart breaking. “Come, let me help you into bed.”

The process is painstaking.  You help hoist her frail frame out of the chair and over to the side of the bed then work carefully to help her lie back.  There’s no meat on her anymore, just skin and bones, so you tuck her blankets carefully around her legs and arms until you’re certain she’s not shivering anymore.

You know this isn’t working.  

It doesn’t matter how many calls you make over the course of a day to check in, or how many well-meaning neighbors drop in to help, leaving your mother alone for hours in this state is a dangerous gamble.  

You fight back tears of frustration.  You grew up without siblings and your father has been gone for years. Being alone is something you’ve had a long time to get used to.  

But you’ve still never felt as alone as you do right now.

You think in the quiet for a while, stroking your fingers across your mother’s upturned palm, unsure of what to say, unsure of what to do.  

Unsure of what comes next.

“Kim Namjoon grew up to be such a handsome man,” your mother rasps.

The steady stroke of your fingers comes to an abrupt halt as the fine hairs on the nape of your neck stand on end.

“Excuse me?”

Your mother doesn’t repeat herself.

“Eomma,” you urge, nudging her hand with yours.  “What is this talk of Kim Namjoon?”

Her lips quirk when she closes her eyes like she’s recalling a pleasant memory.

“His mother was beautiful,” she breathes quietly. “God smiled on that boy. He looks nothing like his father.”

The dull panic that’s already started to pulse in your chest sharpens to a point.

She has to be hallucinating.  

She has to be taking too much medicine because nothing she’s saying makes any sense.  You fumble for the bottles on her nightstand, pulling off the caps and pouring the pills out onto the tabletop.  You count them over and over until you’re satisfied your mother hasn’t taken a dangerous amount of drugs.

“Eomma, why are you talking about Kim Namjoon?” you plead. “Help me understand.”

But when you look back to your mother, you realize your words are already falling on deaf ears. She’s slipped back into a sleep state once again.

If only it were that easy for you.

When you finally get to crawl into bed a short while later, you toss and turn all night.  

Somewhere in the haze between asleep and awake you dream of Kim Namjoon.

*************************

Your mother’s mental clarity is always better in the morning.  

After she’s had a night of rest -- and whatever medicine she’s taken has had some time to wear off -- she’s much more alert, much more like her old self.  But you still weren’t able to get anything by way of answers out of her as you made breakfast this morning.

You’d made her favorite cold cucumber soup before carefully broaching the subject of last night’s strange conversation.  You’d waited patiently for some kind of explanation about why she mentioned a man she hasn’t spoken of in years.

It didn’t come.

There was something odd about the way your mother went completely quiet at your mention of Namjoon.  Something odd about how adamant she was about not having any memory of the conversation at all.

That odd look on her face is the one thought on your mind as you make your way to work in a complete fog.  You slip into an open elevator and hit the button for your floor on autopilot.

You don’t even realize that you’re not alone until a soft voice interrupts your thoughts.

“I remember you.”

Your eyes flick up from their unseeing stare at your shoes to a young woman standing against the elevator’s back wall.  

“Miss Kim,” you breathe, brushing an errant hair out of your face.  Your cheeks are still stinging from the cold. “Good morning.”

Namjoon’s sister is a beautiful woman, without a doubt — but until this moment, you hadn’t realized how much she resembles her brother.  They have the same striking features, the same smooth skin and high cheekbones and full lips.  

They share the same dark, kind eyes.

“I remember you now,” she repeats, mouth curving into a smile.  “I knew I recognized you, but it wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I finally connected the dots.”

“Well, I wasn’t around a lot when we were kids,” you admit shyly. “So that’s certainly understandable.”

“That’s true,” she agrees.  “And I try not to think back to those times a lot but you made an impression on me.  You were always so sweet.”

Your cold cheeks seem to warm at her compliment.

“Thank you.”

The elevator stops at her floor but she seems reluctant to end the conversation.  She leans against the door to prop it open.

“My brother,” she asks carefully, “Is he treating you well?  Is he a fair boss?”

You clear your throat, suddenly feeling self-conscious.

“Well, he’s not my boss anymore,” you admit.  “He replaced me not long ago.  But yes, he was very fair when I worked for him.”

Her lips part in a soft gesture of surprise when you deliver that news.  

She’s quiet until the elevator blares a loud reminder that it’s time to close the doors.  She smiles at you on her way out the door, opting not to comment on the quality of her brother’s staffing decisions.  

“I’m sorry to hear that,” she murmurs. “But I’m still really glad you’re here.”

****************************

An inviting scent is the first thing you notice when you get home that night.  

The second thing you notice are the voices.

You make your way down the long hallway with careful steps, trying to place the sound of the voice coming from your mother’s bedroom.  It doesn’t sound like Mrs. Sim -- in fact, it doesn’t sound like anyone you know.

You stop short at the sight that greets you when you round the corner.

A woman -- a complete stranger is in your mother’s room.

You stand frozen in shock as you watch the stranger read to your mother from her seated position in the chair next to the bed.  She looks up from the page when she realizes you’re there, giving you a better look at her pleasant, aged face.

“Aish,” she startles, clapping a hand over her chest.  “Here I was, worried about scaring you and instead you’re the one giving me a fright.”

It takes you a moment to find your voice.

“Forgive me,” you start weakly, “But who are you?  And how did you get into this house?”

The woman stands to adjust the pillow under your mother’s head before meeting you in the doorway.  “She’s resting now,” she says, nodding at your mother’s still form on the bed.  “Why don’t we talk in the kitchen?”

Should you be screaming right now? Calling the police?  

There’s no good explanation for why you do neither and decide instead to follow this complete stranger into your kitchen instead.  She walks to the stove to stir whatever she has cooking in the pot.

“Get off those feet,” she admonishes kindly. “I’m sure you’ve had a long day.”

Again you comply, inexplicably following orders.  

“I made Budae Jjigae,” she explains, ladling some of the stew into a bowl.  She sets it down in front of you, and you stare back at her like an idiot.  The stew smells amazing, and you’re immediately hit with a well-timed hunger pang.

“Who are you?” you ask again.

“My name is Jinjoo,” she replies sweetly, handing you a spoon.  “And I work for you now.”

“You work for me,” you repeat slowly.

“I do,” Jinjoo nods.  “Mister Kim hired me.”

The spoon clatters loudly against the lip of the bowl when you drop it.  For a moment, it’s hard to breathe. You have to wait for the strange sensation that snakes up your spine to subside before you speak again.

“Mister Kim.”  You echo her again, dumbly.

Jinjoo takes a seat next to you at the table, radiating a patient kindness that makes you want to give into the urge to trust her.  She smiles reassuringly at you, voice soothing when she speaks again.

“Yes. He said you needed help with your mother, and I can understand why.  I nursed in hospitals for decades, dear.  I can see your mother is in a bad way.”

You blink back at Jinjoo in stunned silence.

“I assure you, I’ll give your mother the best quality care,” she vows, patting one of your hands with her own.  “And Mister Kim has already paid me well in advance, so don’t even think about trying to get rid of me.”

That statement almost makes you laugh.  

You don’t want to get rid of Jinjoo at all.  Ten minutes ago you had no idea she existed and in the span of one conversation she’s become one of the most important people you know.  Tears well in your eyes as you stare into your bowl of stew, at a total loss for words.  

Jinjoo seems to sense how overwhelmed you are.  She gives you some space to process what’s going on, stroking one soft hand over your shoulder when she stands to leave.

“Eat something, dear.  I’m gonna go sit with your mother for a while.”

You look up at her with watery eyes and nod, reaching for the spoon.

“This smells really good,” you say softly.

“Well, I’m a great cook.  You’ll see,” she promises.

“Jinjoo -- “ you call out after her as she walks away.  “Thank you,” you manage, voice thick with emotion.  “I can’t thank you enough.”

The corners of her eyes crinkle when her mouth curves into a smile.

“You’re welcome.”

**********************

Jinjoo’s stew was delicious -- not that you had the chance to fully appreciate it.  

You’d sat in that kitchen alone for some time, eating slowly while you tried to process yet another bombshell in what seemed to be a series of them.  Everything that’s happened to you since Namjoon reassigned you has been a whirlwind; from the sudden pay raise to the sudden arrival of Jinjoo.

You eat the last of the stew with your stomach in knots.

Namjoon knows your mother is sick.  And you don’t know how to feel about it.

A part of you feels exposed when you think about him uncovering the sad details of your mother’s health battle. But knowing that he stepped in to help you fight it makes you feel something you haven’t felt in years.  

Cared for.

The sound of laughter from your mother’s bedroom echoes down the hall and you stand to follow it.  

Her favorite variety show is playing on the small TV in front of her bed, and it appears Jinjoo is a fan, too.  You lean in the doorway and watch the women giggle at the silly skit.  It’s been a long time since you’ve heard the sound of your mother’s laugh.  

It makes you smile.

“Jinjoo, could you give us a moment, please?”

You almost hate to interrupt the instant camaraderie between the two women but you recognize that your mother is in the midst of a rare moment of clarity.  You have to strike while the iron is hot.

“Of course,” she agrees, standing.

You wait until the sound of her footsteps fades away before taking her place in the worn chair next to your mother’s bed.  Your mother smiles at you, taking one of your hands into her own.  

You squeeze her fingers gently.

“Eomma, no more secrets,” you murmur.  “Tell me the truth.  Did Kim Namjoon come here?”

Your mother swallows thickly before nodding.

“He asked me not to tell you,” she admits.  “He said he didn’t want you to refuse his help.”

You shut your eyes and imagine Namjoon in your home, in this room. Speaking to your mother.  Making plans to send Jinjoo.  Your chest squeezes so tight that for a moment it’s hard to breathe.

“Okay,” you concede quietly.  You maintain the appearance of careful calm because you don’t want to make your mother feel worse than she already does., “It’s alright Eomma, I’m not angry, I promise.”

A peculiar look passes over her face.  Her eyes dart away from yours and that’s all it takes for you to know you don’t have the full story.  You decide to toughen your stance.

“Look at me, Eomma,” you say firmly.  “If there’s anything I don’t know, you need to tell me right now.  I need to know all of it.  Everything.”

“I -- “

“Just tell me what it is,” you repeat, patience hanging by a thread.

Your mother sighs, lifting one weak hand in the direction of her dresser.  You turn to stare at the pile of papers stacked there, realization dawning in an instant.  You move on unsteady legs to walk over and take hold of them.

Radiology, pulmonology, chemotherapy.  

You know exactly how much is owed on each of those bills because the numbers are burned into your mind. Those numbers are the reason you leave your mother for hours on end every day to go to work.  Those numbers are the reason why it’s so hard to sleep at night.

You don’t realize that your hands are shaking until you hear the papers rustling.

Every bill bears the same neat, handwritten marking.

paid -- knj

***************************

NAMJOON

Namjoon watched his sister leave early tonight with Hoseok. Seokjin is out to dinner with his wife.  And Yoongi is off doing -- well, whatever the hell Yoongi does when he’s not around.

There’s no one here tonight to tell Namjoon to go home.  No one to point out that he’s had too much to drink or that it’s happening far too often.

So he pours another scotch.

The glass sweats in his hand as he stands in front of his window, deep in thought.

Thinking about you.

Thinking about the way you struggled in silence, caring for your mother alone -- too proud to ask for help. The way you catered to Namjoon’s every need and whim without ever making mention of yours.  The way he’d let it go on for far too long, selfishly wrapped up in the way you made him feel.

“That girl is going to get you killed.”

Namjoon tells himself the sound of your voice is a figment of his imagination, an entirely predictable side-effect of too much scotch.  But it’s followed quickly by your soft footsteps against the plush carpet in his office and both sounds are too real to ignore.

He turns to assess you, quietly sipping his drink.

Fuck, you are beautiful.  

You have no right turning up here tonight -- looking like that -- testing him when he is at his weakest.  Your dark eyes flash with something like a challenge and Namjoon feels his blood warm.

“That girl is never at her desk and she has no idea who’s coming or going,” you accuse quietly.  “She’s putting you at risk.”

Namjoon concedes your point with a slow half-smirk that teases the edge of his mouth.

“Perhaps,” he admits.  “But there are different kinds of risk.  Maybe you put me at risk, too.”

He shouldn’t take pleasure from the way your eyes go wide at that statement.  Or from the way you overcompensate by standing taller, chin lifted high.

But he does.

“Mister Kim -- “ you start.

“ -- Namjoon,” he interrupts.  “Don’t you think it’s time you called me Namjoon? Haven’t we known one another since we were kids?”

“Namjoon,” you correct yourself, taking a deep breath. “I know about everything.  Jinjoo, the bills, all of it.”

Namjoon says nothing for a moment, draining his glass before setting it down on his desk with a heavy thud.

“Why?” you ask quietly.  “Why did you do this for me?”

Because I would do anything for you.  

He doesn’t voice that thought out loud.  He knows he shouldn’t.

But he also knows he shouldn’t be closing the distance between you right now, and he’s doing that anyway.  He steps closer, quietly, and you swallow hard, thrown by his silence and his advance.

“That’s not -- that’s not something you do for an employee,�� you protest, slowly backing away.  You stop only when the ledge of his desk hits you on the backside.  

“The late nights and the extra hours.  Everything else you did,” Namjoon murmurs, stepping close, chest rising and falling with his deep breaths.  “Did you do that for your boss?  Or did you do that for me?”

He leans closer, caging your body against his desk.  Your lips part in surprise and Namjoon forces himself not to react when your tongue slips out to wet them.

“Namjoon, I -- ” your voice is barely above a whisper when you find it.  “-- I don’t understand you right now.”

“How could I have every resource at my fingertips and not help you?” he asks, reaching one hand out to cup your face.  The pad of his thumb ghosts over your lips and you shudder under his touch.  “Why didn’t you come to me when you knew I could help?”

“I don’t know,” you admit, pupils blown and cheeks flushed.

“You should have come to me,” he admonishes quietly.  You lean into the touch of his hand.  “I would have given you anything you asked for. Anything.”

“I understand that,” you say quietly, the tremor in your voice betraying your attempt at calm.  “Because I would give you anything you asked for, too.”

Something about the way you say that snaps Namjoon back to reality.  

He looks down at you like he’s only just now realized that he’s loaded on scotch, leaning you over his desk -- and well on his way to taking advantage of this situation.  He tenses, pulling away.

“This is -- this is not --” he sputters pathetically for a moment.  “Go home,” he pleads.  “Please.”

He’s never hated himself as much as he does right now -- when you’re looking up at him with hurt and confusion in those wide, dark eyes.

“Go home before I do something I can’t take back.”

************************

tag list!

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[beeblackburn]

What are your other favorite novels besides TSOIAF?

Thanks for the question!

OH GOOD GOD WHERE DO I BEGIN? 

Putting a “Keep reading” cut because some spoilers for the Realm of the Elderlingsseries and much gushing over one… okay, maybe two of the The First Law sequel standalones. 

First off, most of the novels from the Realm of the Elderlings series. (I’m not totally a fan of Golden Fool and even less of a fan of City of Dragons, except for the Malta, Alise and Sedric parts. Seriously, Malta is better than you all.) Hobb has this romantic melancholy that’s dripping with atmosphere throughout her stories. And I honestly like the meandering in her stories. It builds up this idyllic atmosphere and character development before Hobb’s punctures it and her characters with extreme violence inflicted onto them.

But if I had to single out books… Mad Ship, Fool’s Errand, Dragon Haven and Fool’s Quest.

Mad Ship because I kind of love Wintrow’s character arc here, balancing out his introspective tendencies (and condescension, let’s be honest) with the pragmatism of being in very dangerous territory and having to adapt in ways he never expected from the start of the trilogy. And I rather love how it comes out here and the jarring shift in perspective he has to have.

And this was the first book I got really… engaged with Kennit as a person. Ship of Magic, I was more disgruntled and sighing at his distrust of practically everyone, enemies and allies. I liked his character and Kennit was an intriguing bastard, but he lacked a sort-of human dimension for me. Here, it becomes damn clear that Kennit’s been through so much damage.

And his relationship with Etta and Wintrow and Vivicia is just really kind of intriguing and interesting and engaging to read because it felt like new territory for these characters and I love the way they bounced off each other in this book. They fed and worked off each other splendidly and I even got a few sad feels over Kennit with his relationship with Wintrow.

(No, I’m not excusing his behavior in Ship of Destiny, just pointing out that Mad Ship gave Kennit more dimensions for me to sink my teeth into.)

Althea, Brashen and the other Vestrit family members stopped making me slap my forehead a quarter of the time as well! With a common goal and united together, they were a force to reckon with. Shame it didn’t happen a book earlier, but hey, I’ll take what I can get. Paragon and Amber’s relationship was super intriguing (Amber has the best quote in Mad Ship by far) and Paragon is… Paragon. :)

Also, I STOPPED wanting to push Malta off a bridge. Forever. After a book and a half of her being the world’s most brattiest daughter (and bridge-pushing worthy) her POV became a delight to read because she finally got her priorities straight. The intelligence and cunning was always inside her, she just focused it onto other areas.

ALSO SHE STRONGARMED A DRAGON INTO HELPING HER. Heart eyes, yo.

Fool’s Errand was just great because it was the start to a whole new Fitz. A more dangerous, more competent and “not taking any shit” Fitz. He was rude, he was addicted to elfbark, he snapped back at Chade (honestly, I don’t blame him here), he cuts off all sexual relations with Starling after realizing her marriage, he’s quite obstinate to Dutiful and… that scene. Just that scene. If you read the novel, you know the scene.

Also more Fitz and Fool is wonderful. Along with Nighteyes. It’s a great three-way dynamic between all three and Fitz continued to shine as one of my favorite fantasy protagonists ever, showing off an older, mayhaps wiser, Fitz while making me cringe as he keeps retreating, he cuts himself from people he loves and probably love him back because he thinks they won’t care for him or that he’ll just trouble them.

It’s just a really good, self-contained book in my opinion, containing a nice main plot and a few good subplots thrown into the pot. It starts off slow as Robin Hobb books are like to do and subjects you to a tense storyline full of bang fantastic finishes and narrative pay-offs like you wouldn’t believe that hurt. That really hurt and twist in your heart.

I have an irrational soft spot for Dragon Haven. Sedric, Leftrin and Alise’s arcs were all amazing and I love how Sedric and Alise navigated their respective past abusive relationships and forged onward after realizing and accepting how awful their partner was. My heart ached for Sedric and Alise, even when they were screw-ups in their own right.

Fool’s Quest is just the book that Robin Hobb kept breaking my heart every 20-30 pages. It was so packed full of call-backs, narrative pay-offs, tragedy and heartbreak and triumphs and… I actually never wanted to facepalm at Fitz once. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love how deer-headed Fitz can be sometimes, but other times, they made me sigh and see red at Fitz for being an idiot (I’m talking that scene in Golden Fool.)

Here? Absolutely none of that. Everything made dramatic and characterization sense. There’s just a beauty and believable desperation in Fitz’s inner monologue over the circumstances of this novel. I love the way the story is paced, the snowy jewel that is Hobb’s prose, the old characters I meet again (Chade and Nettle) and the new characters I learn more about and like (Shun and Lant) and the settings Fitz treks to. This novel’s what I’d actually consider the best-constructed Robin Hobb story so far. No contest.

My all-time favorite fantasy standalone though? The Heroes by Joe Abercrombie. I love it, I just love it to pieces, I have a lot of embarrassing emotions for it and I’m pretty unapologetic about it. I have reread that book about 5-6 times and it’s still hilarious, insightful, pithy and full of rich characterization that I can chuckle at and feel a twig of empathy for.

It’s full of anti-war imagery and themes, but what I especially love about it are three things in particular:

1. I love how well Abercrombie captures the “sexy” nature of military bureaucracy. He’s done it with West’s chapters in The First Law, but here, he captures how frustrating it is to deal with the chain of command from a grunt and commander perspective, given his shifting POVs and how slow and unreliable communication between the ranks can be in medieval times. 

Good and shit men die, not because the enemy host was stronger or better than their host, but because lack of military intelligence, fog of war, racial prejudice, inability to take advantage of the terrain or inter-military rivalries. Sometimes, your men die because the messenger you sent to give your orders to them got shot by a stray arrow. By sheer luck, men can lose their lives.

Also, Tunny. Tunny is a one-man commentary on military chain of command.

2. The prose. Abercrombie writes battle scenes like no one’s else business. In my opinion, he writes some of the most chaotic, blood-rushing and deafening war scenes ever, perfectly capturing what it’s like for a common soldier to fight in the middle of a warzone… and how utterly nuts it is, given all that clangor and blades flying. Basically, read the “Casualties” chapter. It’s a masterpiece.

But Abercrombie isn’t content with writing visceral, skull-bashing action, he’s also hilarious, full of sardonic asides and witticisms into his descriptions. Basically, every thought out of Gorst and Calder’s head is gold, Gorst’s in how acidic, self-pitying and sarcastic it is (oh my god, the letter he writes to the King of the Union alone… and stuff like this in the middle of a battlefield: “Gorst had the expression of a boy who had been told he could not have a puppy this year.”) and Calder in how sardonic, slippery and self-conscious it can be. 

And his prose is always clear-cut, but it sings with how accessible and seamless it feels to read. It’s beautiful in a sharp way, most sentences are meant to cut you with a feeling and they hit their marks generally. That’s the thing about Abercrombie’s works: they’re infinitely quotable, almost every line hilarious, poignant, brutal or darkly funny. 

3. THE CHARACTERIZATION BECAUSE ABERCROMBIE EXCELS HERE.

First off, I love Beck. He’s a kid who goes through a well-treaded “war is hell” arc, but it works here because 1. he wasn’t a total innocent, he was an asshole at the start and that’s okay, Abercrombie doesn’t gloss over teenage entitlement, 2. the way he finds out about how hellish war can be is rather shocking in a genre sense, 3. The First Law is all about people trying to escape the cycle of violence and failing and only getting out through death or getting out before your wrists are drenched in blood. Beck’s fate at the end is downright refreshing as a result.

Also, Gorst. Gorst is one fascinating onion from outer layer to the deepest depths of himself. You get all this noted politeness from the giant he is, his constant scathing, contemptuous inner monologue, snarking at everyone’s blaring incompetence, some truly messed-up impulses from his psyche and some really savage swordplay from a “gentle giant” of a man. Gorst is layered and the narrative pay-off for his arc at the end is truly Abercrombiesque.

Finree. Okay, this woman is awesome. Flawed and she constantly blurs the lines of decency and self-interest, love and ambition, gritted politeness and sharp bluntness, but she is awesome and she’s a fascinatingly different perspective on war, both from her relations with her commander father and husband and her own cunning. When you stare down and snipe at both Bayaz and Black Dow, wiping the smirk off Bayaz’s face, you win. You just win to me.

Craw was a cool old guy and I love how Abercrombie doesn’t really tear down the “honor gets you dead” idea that more nihilistic, darker fantasies (including his own!) here. Craw being a “Straight Edge” is actually what gains him social cache and nets him approval from others. People trust him not to stab them in the back and, for the most part, Craw’s not really punished for that so much as his sense of ethics doing it for him. Plus, it’s really fascinating to get a peek into Black Dow’s psyche through Craw’s eyes.

(Also, holy crap, Shivers. You’re scary. You’re so very scary, you’re more ruthless and nihilistic Sandor and my heart kind of hurts for you, but you’re frightening as hell.)

But yeah, I just want to talk about Prince Calder because so many emotions over this scheming bastard. His first chapter already endeared me to his characterization, being an ambitious, scheming, quippy fallen prince who has a heart of silver (bronze more like) towards his wife, his growing insecurities over his place in this warrior society gave me room to empathize with and even his blunt, direct scheming was charming in a win-less way. And his ruthlessness with strangers was par for the course of Abercrombie protagonists.

Then Scale’s initial fate on the battlefield and Calder’s reaction to it. 

Calder only grew more awesome from there when he finally decided to start walking the talk and apply himself into showing the kind of leader he could be. From the military actions he takes, to the funny stuff he commits to, to being snarky under pressure, I grew more and more respect for him not being all talk while acknowledging he’s done some ugly stuff in the past and will continue to do so in the future.

And then his interactions with Black Dow and Bayaz at the end. My brain cheered at the former and it melted at the latter. That meeting was legendary. And then his last chapter. Calder is playing a ballsy as all hell game in the North. It’s just… Calder’s got layers and probably the best character arc in The Heroes.

So yeah, The Heroes, I will always gush unabashedly. Great characters, tight pacing, wonderful themes, smooth prose, witty quotes, hilarious remarks, what’s not to love?

That being said, Red Country has really growing on me a lot in the past year ever since I got more into the Western genre and the writing style in my university courses. It might be Abercrombie’s warmest of his first six novels where not all characters are strictly bastards or monsters, some just being normal people whose only crime is being stuck in a moral rut and not being strong enough to break out of it yet or dark people genuinely trying to reach for better. Same world, but different cast of characters, a relatively moral one.

In that sense, I really appreciate Red Country as Abercrombie deconstructing himself. Temple and Shy are two normal people caught in the muck of darker people and made witnesses to even blacker deeds. It’s genuinely jarring when I read Cosca, one of my favorite anti-heroes, become a dark, dark man since last time, his humor intertwined with horror and atrocity he perpetuates onto more innocents now. And Lamb… let’s just say I got the chills reading Lamb and my reactions to them were Temple and Shy’s reactions to them.

And yet, it’s not entirely pitch-black. The same cutting humor is still there, but there’s a gentle wistfulness in this work barely there in The Heroes. There are some people who regret their black deeds of the past and some who want to rise above the mud again… and some even succeed, believe it or not. For the most overt time, Abercrombie allows some characters to change for the better. After a shitton of skulls, but it’s par for the course of Abercrombie. 

@racefortheironthrone​ also, I’m curious. I’ve seen that you’ve read Abercrombie and commented on the world-building of The First Law but what’s your take on the sequel standalones as stories of themselves?

As for other favorites… Wolf Hall (very well-written historical fiction), The Goblin Emperor (not a book for cynics), The Lies of Locke Lamora (reread 3-4 times, such a beautiful jewel of prose) and the entirety of The Dagger and the Coin quintet (seriously, read it for Geder Palliako and Clara Kalliam, such rich characters that deconstruct well-worn tropes).

[anongoingsoliloquy]

I’m calling this a summer haul because I don’t remember exactly when I bought each of these books. There’s a fair few books on this list, so let’s just get straight into it!

1.       Mr. Mercedes - Stephen King 

Mr. Mercedes is my latest purchase and the book I’m currently reading. I really like it so far! It’s about retired cop, Bill Hodges and his obsession with the Mercedes Killer case. The Mercedes Killer taunts him back into the middle of the case through letters and (i believe) a back and forth dialogue. I thought this book would be a lot more suspenseful, but since it’s the first book by Stephen King that I’ve read, maybe all of them start like this and build the suspense as the book goes on? If you’ve read his books before, let me know!  

2.       The Graveyard Book - Neil Gaiman 

I’ve heard wonderful things about this book! it’s about a boy who is raised in a graveyard and who is hunted by the person who killed his parents. I’ve read a few of Neil Gaiman’s children’s books and really enjoyed them, so hopefully this one will be no different!

3.       The Long Halloween

This is a fairly old standalone Batman series, but oh my does it sound good! In the comic, Batman has to solve the mystery of a serial killer who only murders on holidays. I believe the entire series is set over the few days before Halloween, where Batman must stop the murder of another victim.

4.       Harley’s Little Black Book

This is a special edition connected to the New 52 Harley Quinn series. In these issues, Harley teams up with DC’s finest, including Wonder Woman, Super Man, and even the Bombshell version of herself!  

5.       Dividing Eden - Joelle Charbonneau

In Dividing Eden, twins are pitting against each other when their father, the king, and older brother, the crowned prince, are murdered. Now the twins are destined to become rivals in the fight for the throne.

6.       Caraval - Stephanie Garber

This is the only book anyone ever talked about at the beginning of the summer! It’s about this magical carnival that comes to an island, and takes our main character’s sister. Now, our protagonist must find her sister before the end of the carnival or she will lose her forever. There seems to be a lot of mystery and intrigue in the novel, and I’m super excited to read it!  

7.       The Bone Queen - Alison Croggon

This book is a prequel to the Pellinor series. I haven’t read the original series, but since it’s a prequel I don’t really care. In the novel, a powerful bard unleashes the Bone Queen. And that’s pretty much all I know about it, but I’m pretty excited to jump into this world.

8.       Royal Bastards - Andrew Shvarts

This book is about exactly what the title suggests, royal bastards. The bastard siblings of the king must all band together to protect the legitimate heir to the throne from the forces that would see them dead.

9.       And I Darken - Kiersten White 

This book it about the daughter of Vlad the Impaler and her quest to escape the Ottoman Empire. I hope it touches on the vampire mythos surrounding Vlad and his descendants.  

10.   Closed Casket - Agatha Christie/Sophie Hannah 

Closed Casket is the newest installment in the New Poirot Series. I’ve already finished it and it was amazing! It was a wonderful homage to Agatha Christie’s original series and perfectly captured the essence of her novels! Plus, you can never have too many Poirot novels; he’s the best!

11.   Alex and Eliza - Melissa De La Cruz 

I’ve also already finished this book. It was a light historical fiction, but was a very enjoyable read! it was a sweet love story; perfect if you, like me, are obsessed with Hamilton!

12.   Jughead vol. 2

This comic collection is a continuation of the story from vol. 1, following the antics of Jughead and the other members of the Riverdale squad.  

13.   The Crimes of Jack the Ripper - Paul Roland 

My mom bought me this book because I’ve always been really interested in the Ripper murders. Mostly because he was never caught. This non-fiction book has H Division files, autopsy reports, and autopsy photos, which is kinda gross but super interesting! I’ve read some of it and look forward to finishing this book soon!  

14.   Joker Loves Harley

This comic collection is a continuation of the first volume of the DC Harley Quinn rebirth. I haven’t started this series yet, but hopefully I will get to them soon!

15.   Josie and the Pussycats vol. 1

This is a brand-new series in the Riverdale rebirth. I believe it’s an origin story of how the pussycats first got started as a band.

16.   Neverwhere - Neil Gaiman 

This is another book by Neil Gaiman. It’s about a man who literally falls through the cracks of London, into a dark world under the city. Funny story, this book was donated to my mom’s work place, and since she works at a daycare, the books that were donated were much to advanced for the children. Because of this, the staff where told to take which ever books they wanted for themselves. So, my mom brought this book home for me, but little did she know was that this book was the sold-out book I was looking for the previous weekend. Talk about destiny and chicken!

17.   The Woods - Harlan Coben

This book was also part of the ‘too advanced for daycare students’ donations box. My mom brought me this one because it reminded her of Mr. Mercedes. It’s about a cop who is pulled back into the case of missing girls, one of whom was his sister, when one of the girls mysteriously returns to their sleepy little town.

And that’s it! Oh my, that was a lot of books! Let me know if you’ve read any of these books and what you thought of them!

Thanks for reading

[sahibookworm]

Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly meme created at The Broke and the Bookish that now has a new home at That Artsy Reader Girl.

It’s finally time to talk about all the books I loved and adored in 2019 and I’m already very very excited. These may not all be the ones I rated 5 stars and I may have even found some flaws in them, but they are all the books which I felt a deep connection to, have already reread (atleast some of them) and I would love to share them all with you. Because I have a huge list, I’m gonna divide based on my favorites for each month.

January

All of you already know how much love I have for Red, White and Royal Blue because I have been shouting about it for the past one year now, but I still can’t stop. My first favorite of 2019, it remained my top throughout the year because it’s that special.

I couldn’t believe I had waited so long to read The Song of Achilles because it’s such a well written and emotionally affecting read that I couldn’t forget it for a while. And as expected, it involved a lot of tears.

February

Watch Us Rise is a powerful YA contemporary with lots of commentary on white beauty standards, fatshaming, feminism and intersectionality. It had it’s issues especially regarding white feminism, but I really connected with all the other themes.

The Right Swipe is a super sexy romance featuring a powerful black woman CEO and a soft cinnamon roll ex-football player hero, while also talking about important issues like workplace sexual harassment and the longterm affects of CTE on football players. I loved Rhiannon so much as a character and can’t wait to see her again in the rest of the series.

Heated Rivalry is probably my favorite sports romance of the year and I can’t tell you enough how much I love Ilya and Shane as a couple. The development of their relationship over almost a decade is just brilliantly written and it is at times both sweet and sexy. The author said she would be writing a sequel for them soon and that sounds amazing.

March

The Huntress is a thrilling fictionalized story of the strength and resilience of women who fought in WWII and survived, and also those who fought years later to bring justice to the Holocaust victims, even when the world was ready to forget them all.

The worst part about Descendant of the Crane is the fact that we don’t know if it will ever get a sequel. This book has so many twists and turns and betrayals that I was on the edge of my seat for most of the time. What a debut.

I wasn’t even gonna read The Priory of the Orange Tree but once I started, I just couldn’t stop. It has an expansive world and mythology, an excellent cast of characters and a sapphic romance for the ages.

And one of my most anticipated releases of 2019, We Set the Dark on Fire is the most fiery and passionate romance of the year set in the backdrop of a revolution, and after that mind blowing cliffhanger ending, the sequel can’t come soon enough.

April

Good Talk is a book that left me feeling a lot of things and with many questions on my mind, because I just found it so relatable and relevant to my current life. Too real and heartfelt, maybe even painful at times, but nonetheless a very important read.

I would have never read Aru Shah and the End of Time if not for some cajoling by my dear friend Nandini, but thank god she did. Because, this book is just so much fun and the elements from the Mahabharata are perfectly captured.

May

Shadow of the Fox is the beginning of one of my favorite current YA fantasy series and it was such a delight to read. A sweet and lovely protagonist like Yumeko, a funny and unlikely ensemble cast and a quest full of adventures and monsters – what more could I have asked for.

The Candle and the Flame is what you would call a quiet fantasy, it doesnt have a lot of high stakes but reading it just gives an amazing feeling. And the setting of the fictional City of Noor is probably my favorite of the year. Such a charming and unforgettable debut.

A smiling fat brown girl on a cover – I was in love with There’s Something about Sweetie since the first time I saw it, and it will always have a special place in my heart.

June

I adore The Bone Witch trilogy but the finale The Shadow Glass is my favorite – this series has the best characters, beautiful relationships and an ending that blew my mind. A perfect trilogy…!!!

And now the perfect standalone of the year for me, Sorcery of Thorns. While I love the adorable romance and the ever mysterious demon Silas, the heart of this story is a love of books and I resonated with it very deeply. The climax fight is just perfection.

One Giant Leap is not great by any means, but it’s the sweetest romance I read last year and I just couldn’t get it out of my mind. And the setting of space travel and a delightful set of nerdy characters make for a charming story that will make you smile.

Hungry Hearts is an anthology that has all my heart – a beautiful amalgamation of food and culture and the importance of both in our lives, it’s a heartwarming read and definitely made me very hungry.

July

My top most anticipated release of 2019, A House of Rage and Sorrow was as explosive as I expected it to be and the roller coaster ride just amazed me. I think I raced through it in a couple of hours because I couldn’t put it down for even a second.

Jade City is a book that took it’s time but once it got a hold on me, it wouldn’t let go. I was tense through most of it and the twists and turns just killed me.

I don’t know what I was expecting from Govinda, but I didn’t expect it to just completely mesmerize me. What an imaginative retelling of my favorite epic. And hatsoff to the author for attempting this for her debut.

August

The Merciful Crow is definitely one of my favorite debuts of 2019, with it’s brilliant cast, fascinating world and magic system, an endearing romance and great commentary on class and oppression. I’m very eagerly waiting for The Faithless Hawk.

Three Parts Dead is a book that is pretty out of my comfort zone, but I just wanted to give it a try and it completely blew me away with the unique world building and magic system. I’m quite excited to continue with the rest of the series.

September

I feel like Steel Crow Saga is one of the most underrated fantasy novels of last year and it deserves so much more hype. It has an excellent ensemble of diverse characters, I loved how queernormative it was, the commentary on war and colonization is on point, and it wears it’s Asian inspiration on it’s sleeve. Love it so much.

Bringing Down the Duke was a delight to read and as someone who doesn’t know much about the suffragette movement in the UK, I loved the setting and getting to know more about the struggles the women faced who were fighting for their rights. And the romance is a lot of fun.

I never knew the whole story of the Harvey Weinstein scandal, so reading She Said which is about the investigation, the scope of it and the sheer number of courageous women who came forward to tell their stories, made me feel all kinds of things. This can be a very rage inducing read but also a very important one at the same time.

Probably one of my top favorite YA fantasies of the year, There Will Come a Darkness has excellent worldbuilding, another ensemble cast which I fell in love with and some amazing action sequences. I can’t wait to read the sequel.

October

Burn It Down is an anthology that really affected me, with it’s number of essays on women talking about their relationship with anger and how it has affected them during their life. I think this is a very important read and I know I will be going for it again and again.

Blowout is a fascinating read (and listen) about the Oil and Gas industry and it’s impact on global geopolitics, and I had so much fun listening to it narrated by Rachel herself. It’s very informational, can feel pretty bleak at times but still ends with a dash of hope.

While Catch and Kill is also mostly about the Harvey Weinstein investigation, it’s also a story about the intimidation tactics used by powerful people for covering up their crimes, and the lengths to which sexual harassment is covered up across major corporations. Hatsoff to Ronan for his work but also for his excellent writing style, because this one surely reads like a spy thriller.

November

I never thought a history book would make this list, but How to Hide an Empire is a brilliantly written book about the unknown (or deliberately misrepresented) history of the American empire which exists till today. I learnt a lot of things here and I think it should be required reading for everyone who want to know more about their country.

This is How You Lose the Time War literally has nothing going for me because it is completely out of my comfort zone, but I got lost inside the poetic beauty of this love story and had to try very hard not to cry in public. Such an imaginative book.

The Poppy War was a great debut and I really enjoyed it, but The Dragon Republic took the whole story to another level and I’m just glad that I decided to read this series. It’s absolutely brilliant and I can’t recommend it enough.

I saw Killers of the Flower Moon on a must read books of the decade list, and decided maybe I should give it a try. And what a riveting read this was. The writing itself is exceptional, but it’s the content that is almost disbelieving to read about, and I wish everyone in the country would get to know more about this bloody history of Oklahoma.

December 

I was definitely motivated to read Blood of an Exile because of the presence of dragons, but this book turned out to be so much more. Almost two very different worlds in one, a highly unlikely group of characters coming together to form beautiful friendships and some excellent twists and turns – this became an instant favorite and I can’t wait to read Sorcery of a Queen.

A very unexpected read which wasn’t even on my radar, The Paper Menagerie and Other Stories totally blew my mind with the author’s storytelling as well the very important themes he was able to talk about within just a few words.

Are any of these your favorites too? What are some of your favorite books from last year? Let me know all your thoughts or links in the comments below…

TTT: Favorite Books of 2019 Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly meme created at The Broke and the Bookish that now has a new home at…

[jenmedsbookreviews]

Is there anything better than finding a series of books that you love? Characters that you can return to again and again, whose lives you become so invested in that you simply have to know what their future holds. Books which you devour in no time while all the time regretting the wait until the next books is released?

Like any self-respecting reader I am a sucker for a good series. Don’t get me wrong. I love a good standalone too, but there is something about those enduring characters, the ones who get under your skin, that gets me super excited. I am always happy to be back in their company. My trepidation is not over whether I will like the book, only what fresh hell the author has put them through this time. So I’d like to share a few of these with you today. Some are relatively new, some are just new to me. All are fabulous.Rachel Abbott – Tom Douglas Series – @RachelAbbott

Typically of me I started this series in the completely wrong order. I found The Back Road first through a Bookbub promotion. Read it. Loved it. Never looked back. Had absolutely no concept of self publishing when I read this. I liked the writing, I liked the character. It is unusual in that Tom Douglas was never meant to be the central character focus, but I think the guy just took on a life of his own. Brilliant series.

Rachel Amphlett – Dan Taylor and Kay Hunter series – @RachelAmphlett

I first heard Rachel speak on an indie panel with Rachel Abbott back at Crimefest in 2016. Her series, featuring former soldier Dan Taylor, sounded like my kind of book so I treated myself to the books and the first audio. Several long car journeys later I was hooked. It was a no brainer for me when I was asked if I wanted to review the first Kay Hunter book late last year. Both are absolutely cracking series that I can’t recommend enough. Another big tick in the box for the Indie authors.

MJ Arlidge – Helen Grace Series – @mjarlidge

I’m not sure how I ended up reading this series but I am very glad I did. I chose the first book, Eeny Meeny, as I was on a bid to read a book from each of the cities I had depots in. Southampton seemed as good a place to start as any. A hard hitting lead character with a very troubled past, Helen Grace rocks. There is a slightly darker edge to books in this series, probably not recommended for kids, but certainly highly recommneded for crime lovers.

Mark Billingham – Tom Thorne Series – @MarkBillingham

I’m playing catch up on this series, attacking it from both ends by reading the latest books in the series and listening to the audio of te early books. Love the styling and have a bit of a soft spot for the rule breaking copper with a good heart, Tom Thorne. There is so much I still have to read and I am fully looking forward to the rest of the journey. I’m loving seeing the move to Thorne as a family man and the odd partnership developing between Thorne and Tanner in the latest book is one I’m happy to see continue. Fabulous.

Robert Bryndza – Erika Foster Series @RobertBryndza

I have loved this series from the very first book. Erika Foster is a strong female role model, the cases are exciting and the team Erika builds around her are fabulous. This series has nearly made me late for work on more than one occasion where I was sat in the car park desperate to listen to the end of a chapter on the audible book version. Each book keeps getting better and the character of Erika Foster more endearing, if that’s the right word, with each one.

John Connolly – Charlie Parker Series @jconnollybooks

Day 17 – A Game of Ghosts

Oh Charlie Parker, how I love thee … Well the series anyway. I came across this series via Twitter in 2015. I know. Where had I been? From the very opening scenes I was a little wary – it was quite gory to be fair and I wasn’t entirely sure about Parker. The more I read, the more I got to like him. A lot. From a clean start in July, by January I had caught up on all I had missed in readiness for the next release. Love this series, particuarly the supernatural thread. And the characters, Parker, Sam, Louis, Angel … Simply fabulous. These aren’t a quick read but they are so worth your investment of time. Soooo worth it.

Thomas Enger – Henning Juul Series @EngerThomas

I found this series at book 4. I quickly reversed to start the series from the beginning. With such vivid imagery this series beautifully captures the Norwegian setting perfectly. And the protagonist, Henning Juul, is such an intriguing character, spurred on by the need to find out the truth about what happened to his son, you cannot help but fall a little in love with him. Brilliant series. I really don’t want to read book five. It cant be over …

Patricia Gibney – Lottie Parker Series @trisha460

As police officers go, Lottie Parker is perhaps one of the most flawed. She drinks, she may have a little bit of a drug problem and she has a terribly difficult relationship with her children. The latest book in the series goes some way to explaining Lottie’s past and has made me love our Ragmullin based Detective even more. It just keeps getting better wth every book.

Sarah Hilary – Marnie Rome Series @sarah_hilary

Oh I do have a knack for reading things in the wrong order!!! Starting with book three which I came across quite by accident on Netgalley, I instantly fell in love with the characters, the style of writing and the very complex and yet moving storylines which dominate this series. Set in London, Sarah Hilary paints quite a stark picture of the capital in a series which features a protagonist who is as tough as she is kind, and whose past keep coming back to taunt her.

Matt Johnson – Robert Finlay Series @Matt_Johnson_UK

This series may well be only two books long right now but those two books have made an impression and I can’t wait for the next one. Robert Finlay is a great character, affected by his traumatic past, he is a PTSD sufferer but one with an amazing support network. A wonderful blend of police and action thriller from a guy who knows his stuff, this is highly recommended.

Ragnar Jonasson – Dark Iceland Series @ragnarjo

I don’t think I had read any literature in translation before reading this book. I tried Les Miserable twenty or so years ago and gave up about page two if that counts? Having seen Ragnar Jonasson at Crime Fest I was really intrigued about the idea of a series set in the wilds (?) of Iceland and bought the then three published books on audio. I listened to them in a week. Haven’t looked back. I am total nordic/scandi noir convert.

Stuart MacBride – Logan McRae and Ash Henderson Series @StuartMacBride

Oh how to begin? I fell onto Stuart MacBride’s work by accident (not literally I might add). I was in love with the Tony McLean series and one of the characters was named after Stuart so, out of curiosity, I looked him up. I bought the second Ash Henderson book on a whim, only a two book series rather than the nine Logan books I needed to read. Oh my life. I was hooked. Bought and read though all nine Logan McRae books in a round a week over Christmas a couple of years ago. Stonkingly special.

Angela Marsons – Kim Stone Series @WriteAngie

Day 21 – Broken Bones

Bet you didn’t see this coming did you? I ‘found’ this series after seeing an article on Twitter about a local author selling over a million copies of her books. Yes. I was that late … Made up for it since though. Massive fan of this series and so proud to be able to call Angie a friend now too. If you haven’t read any Kim Stone, you haven’t lived. At least not well enough. I have my whole family hooked on them now too. And this is the only series/author which has persuaded me to do a vlog review. Trust me this is massive. Until two years ago, I wouldn’t even have my picture taken other than for my passport…

Val McDermid – Hill & Jordan Series @valmcdermid

Man oh man. If I was late to the Angie Marsons party, I am arriving just in time for the washing up with this one … I only start listening to the audio last year, the start of Val McDermid’s epic career coming during my self imposed reading hiatus. I am catching up quite quickly though. This series taught me that I need to be very careful when playing audio books in the car as one particular scene in The Mermaid’s Singing which was playing as my sister got in the car led to more than a few raised eyebrows. Love this series though and if you can cope with the dark and often macabre at the start of the series, then I’d highly recommend it.

James Oswald – Tony McLean Series @SirBenfro

Day 9 – Written In Bones

This is the series which reignited my passion for reading. I won’t lie, when I read the original first scene for Natural Causes I wondered what the hell I’d gotten myself into. It’s quite dark. But as I read on I fell in love with the writing, the character and the special blend of the police procedural with something a little more supernatural. I used to spend my summers camping on the edges of Edinburgh and this series just transported me right back there. Love everything about it. If you haven’t read it yet, you really must. Really. really must.

Ian Rankin – Rebus Series @Beathigh

Yep. You guessed it. Another series I started late and another series I have been reading/ experiencing out of order. I am trying my best to catch up. There are twenty one books now. I had seventeen years of reading. I buy four or five books a week and read three to four … I will catch up though as I love this hard drinking and rule flaunting Detective. I am powering through the audio as and when I can. I will try to review one day too. I can still remember them all. This series also taught me to be careful when selecting audio books when driving colleagues around …

Marnie Riches – George McKenzie series @Marnie_Riches

Love the blend of the UK and the Netherlands in this one. There is something about the characters of George and her lover Van den Bergen which really draws you in. The stories are full of heart stopping action and there are so many moments of light and shade in this book. George is seemingly unstoppable, dedicated to her family and yet also to getting justice. Loved it. And there’s a new book coming. Even better.

LJ Ross – DCI Ryan Series @LJRoss_author

Heavenfield

Angel

Day 20 – High Force

I was introduced to this series by my sister who read and loved the first few books. I took the plunge and listened to the audible books on one of my many long drives around the country and was immediately struck by not only the quality of the writing, the tense plotting and the lovable, if somewhat occasionally grumpy, DCI Ryan, but the setting. Northumbria almost becomes a character in its own right, the authors love for the area shining through the writing. And the plotlines … so tense. nail-biting and perfectly timed. And I’m a character now too. I’d like to say a nice one but that all depends on perspective …

Carol Wyer – Robyn Carter Series @carolewyer

Oh I do love me a local story and it doesn’t come uch more local for me, the central character in this series working about fourteen miles from my front door. Each one of these books has been a complete joy, combining brilliant writing with exciting and often tense storylines. It’s not all hard paced action; the stories capture both a brilliant tension and an emotional edge too. I love the camaraderie between Robyn and her team but also her cousin, Ross. Heck even Shearer s growing on me. And the back story … the unknown … the wondering if Robyn will ever find the truth. Can’t wait for the next book.

…

So there you have it. My favourite series. Any you think I should be reading (if I get time …) What are your favourites?

Have a fabulous day of reading everyone.

Jen

Love one, love them all … My favourite series Is there anything better than finding a series of books that you love? Characters that you can return to again and again, whose lives you become so invested in that you simply have to know what their future holds.