#it wont go away this kinda stuff stresses me out

[danikamariewrites]

sooo for that feyfey request.

everyone is living back in that cottage. fey is fucking that guy. but theres this woman, who is like a neighbour. she always sees fey and has a crush on her, but isaac (i think thats what his name is?) is keeping fey busy

one day, reader gathers the courage to flirt with fey

then slowly, the become friends and some time later, when fey is eating dinner with reader, reader crawls up onto the desk sensually and is being all hot and sexy

fey realises for the first time she likes this woman. its soo taboo but fey wants this

so she lets reader show her all the good stuff 😏

and then in the end its a lil fluff but they both know this wont progress further most probably 😔

(absolute filth plis im so thirsty for mommy feyre 😩😩😩(i also dont mind if its porn without plot i just need som filth 🥲))

When She Loved Me

Feyre x reader

A/n: This was the best Feyre ask I think I’ve ever received and I had to write it. I also added an epilogue-esqu ending and it’s kinda sad so I’m sorry for that but I couldn’t resist.

Warnings: oral, fingering, tribbing, angst at the end (also not fully proof read)

You rushed around the house making sure everything was perfect for when Feyre arrives. Dinner was in the oven, the living room was fully of cozy blankets, and you had turned the lights down to achieve the perfect ambiance.

The two of you met in town months ago. At first you had just waved and passed each other while you were running errands and she was trading pelts from animals she hunted. One wintery afternoon you got up the courage to finally introduce yourself.

The blue of her eyes had taken your breath away. When her rough exterior melted away and she gave you a genuine smile you couldn’t help but get lost in dreams of a future with her. Where that smile was never dulled by her hunting or family.

Tonight was the first time Feyre was coming over to hang out. You had only ever hung around in town together but you wanted one on one time away from prying, judgmental eyes. The nature of your relationship had been a little more than friendly. Sure you flirted, not thinking anything of it. Feyre had told you about her and Isaac. How he was just someone to relieve stress and blow off steam with.

The relief you felt when Feyre had said that was like a weight lifting off your chest. Since she had said that you had turned your flirtatious advances up hoping she would reciprocate. When Feyre did you were rendered speechless. The giggle that sounded from her was angelic.

A light knock on the front door had you squealing with excitement. Rushing through the house you skid to a stop, careful not to fling yourself into the door. Opening the door you’ve never seen Feyre look so happy. “Hi,” you breathed. “Hi.” Her voice light and happy. Stepping to the side you wave her in.

She looks around curiously. Her eyes wide as she shrugged her jacket off. “Your home is lovely.” You take her jacket to hang up. Gosh, how did this thing keep her warm out in the woods? The fabric was barely held together by the leather straps Elain had sewed in for her.

“Thank you. My mother has quite the eye for interior design. You should see her and my father’s room.” You joke. Feyre gives you a sad smile. As if she was remembering her old house. Guilt had your face heating. Feyre grabbed your hand giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Dinner smells wonderful.” She says, that happiness back in her voice.

You perked up at the mention of the meal in the oven. “You’re going to love it. Come,” you pull her along to the kitchen. As you ate the conversation went to weird childhood stories and Feyre’s hunting adventures. After dinner you switched to the living room, curling up in the blankets on the couch and enjoying the brownies you baked.

As the night went on your stares lingered on each other. Eyes wandering what could be seen of the others form. With each tick of the clock the two of you inched closer and closer until your thighs were touching. At the first touch you jumped a little. Only relaxing when Feyre holds your hand again.

When the clock struck midnight Feyre was lying on your chest. You absentmindedly twirled her sandy locks between your fingers. You fall into a comfortable silence just enjoying each other’s comfort. Not thinking before moving, you lean forward pressing a kiss to the top of Feyre’s head.

Shock took over as she popped her head up, eyes wide. “I-I’m sorry. I don’t know-’’ Feyre surged forward, connecting her lips to yours, effectively stopping your rambling. Your fingers go back to those sandy locks, keeping Feyre’s lips attached to yours.

The kiss was all want, need and a fight for dominance that you were determined to win. You wrap an arm around her waist, pulling Feyre up, flipping her to lay on the couch. Feyre’s breath hitches, her fingers digging into your scalp. You detach your lips from her, nudging your nose against her perfect button one.

Holding yourself back was becoming impossible. You need Feyre like you need to breathe. Every part of her is perfect and you were desperate to explore her.

You were both breathing heavily. Feyre lifts her head to peck your lips before dropping back against the couch cushion. “Do you want to keep going?” You asked, hopeful her answer would be a resounding fuck yes.

Feyre nodded vigorously. Her blue eyes glazing over with lust, “I want you, y/n.” Your lips break out into a wide smile. Climbing off of the couch you grab her delicate hand, pulling her to follow you to your bedroom. Slamming your door you turn to find Feyre laid out on your bed, only in her underthings, smirking at you seductively. In a swift motion you slip your dress off, leaving it in a puddle on the floor as you bound toward Feyre.

She lets out a giggle, the sound so sweet it almost stops you completely. It has your cheeks flushing as you straddle her hips. Feyre rests her hands on your hips, gently running them up and down your sides, reveling in the smoothness of your skin. Something flashed in her eyes, making her look anywhere but you.

“Hey,” you say softly, bringing your hand to rest on her cheek. “What’s wrong, Fey?” She squeezes your hips gently before looking into your eyes. “I just…I’ve never been with a girl before and I like you, I just don’t want to, ya know,” she rambles. You tilt your head in curiosity. “Fey it’s ok. We’ll take it slow, you just relax. I got you.” You smirk at her, leaning down to place soft, open mouthed kisses down her neck.

Moving down her body you undo the band around her breasts, stopping at the top of her underwear. You look at her through your lashes, finding her face flush, eyes half closed and lips parted. You rub her clothed cunt, making her wet spot grow with each circular motion. Feyre lets out a soft moan as you kiss up her thighs. “Please y/n, I need more, need your mouth.” She begs, throwing her head back against the pillows.

Sitting up on your knees you remove the band from your own breasts, reaching to pull Feyre’s panties agonizingly slow down her legs. Wasting no time you dive into Feyre’s dripping core, lapping at her arousal. Feyre moans out your name, gripping the sheets, her hips squirming against your face.

Capturing her clit in your mouth you let out a hum. Your eyes roll back at the taste of her plus those sweet, sweet sounds falling from her lips. “More,” she begs, “please more. Your fingers p-please.” Feyre struggles to get out. Bringing your finger to her hole you slowly work her open. “Tell me, was Issac this good with his mouth?” You ask with a teasing smirk against her pussy. She shakes her head, “N-no. Fuck no, you’re so much better y/n.”

You go back to sucking her clit, slipping another finger into her pussy. You know you hit that sweet spot (one that Issac clearly never hit) by the way she clenched around your fingers as you curled them. Feyre’s screams became louder and louder with each motion. “Come on Fey, let go.” You urge her. Arching her back Feyre falls apart on your fingers, one of her thighs trembling. Removing your fingers you lap up her release, the sweet taste of her intoxicating.

Sitting up on your knees you run your hands in a soothing motion up and down her thighs. Feyre went limp against the sheets, her chest heaving as she collected herself. Spreading her legs Feyre lets out a small laugh, “Good. I wasn’t done yet.” You laugh at her breathlessness. Throwing one leg over her hips you rest your pussy against hers, lightly rocking back and forth.

Feyre throws her head back again, leaving her neck exposed to you. You picked up the pace of your hips, leaning down to suck and nip at her the juncture of her neck and shoulder. Feyre brings her hands up to your breasts. Running her thumbs over your peaked nipples you moan against her skin at the contact.

Neither of you lasted long. Feyre’s hands felt too good, too skilled. Sharing a pillow she played with your hair as your eyes fluttered at the feeling and softness. You could get used to this. The softness of Feyre, taking care of her, having her in your arms every night. But that was a dangerous way of thinking. Maybe if everything worked out with her sisters marrying, then maybe she could be yours.

———

After that night with Feyre there were only a few more until you stopped seeing her. You had been holding back your feelings, hoping to bring it up while holding her to your chest. It had been a while since you’d been past her family’s cottage, or into town for that matter. Feyre would usually knock on your door asking you to accompany her but hadn’t in weeks.

Donning your cloak and winter boots you head out. Passing through town you heard whispers of the Archeron family name. “His boats were found.” “No, I think a beast did that. No winter winds have ever been that strong,” “I wonder when the middle one will throw a party.” “The aunt is sick I believe.”

All of these pieces yet nothing whole. The gossip made your heart pound. Picking up the pace you start running to the Archeron cottage.

Finally stopping in front of it you feel your heart stop. Your eyes wide taking in the darkness inside and the broken front door. Stepping closer you saw claw marks in the rotting wood. You stopped breathing. What the hell happened here?

“Are you looking for the Archeron’s?” You jump at the voice behind you. You turn to face the stranger, hand over your now rapidly beating heart. Clearing your throat you answer, “Yes, do you know where they are?” “Yeah, new fancy manor-lookin’ place on the other side of town.” You nod in thanks rushing off, knowing exactly where to go.

Politely knocking on the massive front door you step back and wait, twisting your gloved fingers nervously. Elain answered with a bright smile. Her eyes lit up with recognition at seeing your face. “Y/n! What a lovely surprise.” She said cheerily. “Hi, Elain. Is Feyre around?” You ask peeking over her shoulder. Elain’s face fell a little. “Oh, no, I’m so sorry. She’s visiting our aunt. She’s very ill right now so Feyre is helping around her house for a bit. I can’t believe she didn’t tell you.” She says with an air of curiosity, tilting her head a little to the left much like Feyre did when you rambled.

Tears stung your eyes at the familiar movement. You quickly blink them away, not wanting Elain to feel pity for you. “Oh, well I’m sorry about your aunt, I hope she gets better soon. Would you mind umm…when Feyre gets back will you tell her I want to see her?” “Of course!” You nod in thanks and turn to leave. Left with an empty feeling in your heart you let your tears flow freely once you’re back on the street. Why wouldn’t she tell you?

[hugemilkshake]

Oh my gosh your open again hooray! I just love your writing so much!

Can I request Longan, Pitaya, Ananas, Espresso and Elder Faerie x Reader who just out of nowhere mailed them a letter with only the words "Thank you for Everything..."

And we all know if someone just says that and nothing came out of it but just that sentence that specific person is going to do something stupid but the thing is Reader only said that because they are thankful and was just about to just go and sleep and wake up later to watch a movie

So just imagine them Cookie's immediately going to Reader's House even though there so SO far away(The Dragons are in there palace, Elder Faerie in Beast Yeast, and Espresso on an expedition with Madeleine Cookie and Reader is/at Cookie Kingdom in Crispia chilling)

Enjoy the milkshake! Now ngl you had me at the first part but thank goodness it wasn’t going in the direction I thought it would-

Mail Mistake (it’s silly, trust)

-romantic scenario-

The day was peaceful, everything was just as everything should be… well until your significant other got a letter from you…

“Thank you for everything”

That was what the letter said. This caused a panic in your partner. They went to check on you because they were scared for you

Longan Dragon

Usually The Ivory Dragon wont come visit you but this was concerning

They might not know much about cookies but they knew this was not something a cookie would say if something was wrong

So they actually went and visited you instead of sending one of their eyes out to you

But they found you outside reading a book and drinking some tea

When the dragon asked you why you sent that letter.

All you said was “I wasn’t done writing it. Opps”

The dragon was very confused

Pitaya Dragon

The Red Dragon cycled through the five stages of grief.

They talked to cookies enough to know that this was the worst possible thing for you to receive

So they did what any logical cookie would do

Break your door down in a panic!

Only to find you sleeping in bed

*insert confused Pitaya*

When you woke up you said that you accidentally sent it

Luckily for you Pitaya can’t stay mad at you

Ananas Dragon

Ananas isn’t really too caught on modern cookie stuff so they kinda thought you wanted Ananas to chill with you

And when asking about the letter you said that you didn’t finish writing it

And you also explained that the letter could be seen as a very concerning thing

Ananas has now since asked you to teach them modern cookie stuff

Espresso Cookie

Man is tired and stressed so thanks for tripling that

He goes to check on you only to find you with several cats

You say that he needed a break

Espresso tells you that this is NEVER the way to get someone’s attention

You do apologize since it wasn’t the right thing to do

But in the end you both snuggled with cats

It was very nice

Elder Faerie

This man is OLD

Definitely thinks that your writing poetry

Well until one of the other faeries say that the letter is actually quite concerning

So he goes to find you

He finds you stuck in a tree.

You tell him that you wanted to do some poetry but failed

You also asked for him to help you down

[kursedmayo]

I saw a post earlier about this idea about sugardaddy/baby dynamic but the younger person is the sugardaddy. Thinking of writing a Future Leo x Reader blurb about it cuz it seems pretty interesting.

Wait I already got an idea for the first chapter actually.

So like imagine this right? MC is around late 20's or early 30's and their parents just passed away. Their family's multi-million company just got passed on to them and they're kinda lonely and everything because their friends are all starting families, spending time with their lover/s or just tryna focus on their career or something, so you can imagine the stress of handling an entire company and stuff getting to them and leading them to go to a bar and start day drinking. Just to take the edge off.

They go in and the bars mostly empty and sit a few chairs away from to this green guy right? Definitely a turtle. Cant tell if theyre a mutant or a yokai but its not like it matters to them and its not their business. Middle aged probably. They were just gonna bask in silence and misery before the guy pipes up and asks them why they're there. They feel a bit defensive and respond appropriately. Guy huffs in amusement and start small talk, even though they're clearly not in the mood.

They get a few drinks in. Older guy keeps chatting them up like theyre friends and they're contemplating on just leaving to escape the conversation before realizing he might be lonely too and they reluctantly stay. More drinks in, they're feeling a bit better. Guy asks them again why they're there. Their mood sours but shit why not.

They tell him 'bout his Parents dying recently. Tell him about how most of his friends are almost always busy. Tell him how hard it is after he got a "new promotion" and how most of his relatives want to mooch off him just because he earns more than them. Forget to mention he manages a company. Guy keeps asking. He keeps talking. It feels so nice to feel listened and seen by someone he doesn't have to pay for just to connect with. He gives them some advice and they chat more.

Eventually he pays for both their drinks and tries to stumble out of the bar but the guy stops him and gets him an Uber. He seems nice. They ask him to write down his name since hes still sober enough to know they wont remember in the morning if he doesn't write it down. Guy just chuckles.

"Leonardo Hamato. Call me Leo."

They nod before getting into the uber and waving him good bye.

What a nice guy...

[rzyraffek]

OH OH REQUEST IDEA....TAKING SLASHERS HOME TO MEET YOUR PARENTS BECAUSE THATS LIKW SUPER SMART

Billy Micheal and Jason are the only ones i care about but you can add whoever

Omg hi!! Thanks for request!

They/them, sfw and request open

Slashers meeting s/o perents

Billy Lenz

Why would you do that

No fr why would anyone think this was good idea

Guy cant say a sentence without swear words or weird sex jokes😭

But fr billy will be so nervous!! Lil baby doesn't know how to behave!

S/o has to give him tutorial how to act like normal human and not 3rats in trench coat

Perents will be... alarmed to say the least... like really?? You could pick anyone but you picked oversized goblin?? Wow s/o

If s/o has younger siblings, he will bite them btw

Usually perents want to have grandchildren but oh god oh no not with this guy please s/o think about it!!

Billy vibes tbh he likes s/o perents they goofy. He also ate raw pasta. All of it

He told s/o dad that he wants lego for chrismas btw

Micheal Myers

How much you drank to think thats a good idea

Soo you telling me you bf is a serial killer?

At least he won't say anything rude, and s/o perents are too intimidated to say something rude about him🥰peace

Micheal just stares really, hes harmless for now

Yes s/o mom will call them to make sure that they aren't kidnaped and this all stuff is acually consensual

Live laugh love dont get stabbed by Michael

Yall can't even eat a dinner together 😔my guy looks like npc. Like yall just sit nicley and my homie just🧍 he doesn't even eat he just looks at yall, he totally judges their outfits

Hide your pets away he might eat them. You have pet hamster? What hamster?

Jason Voorhees

Omg homeboy is stressed! What if they don't like him:((

At first their perents were intimidated by him, but s/o's mom and him got along very fast! They are baking cookies together! Also if s/o has smol siblings or animals o my god he is bff with them instantly

Their mom and him acually got along faster than s/o with jason when they met first time!

Helps with carring heavy stuff... you bought new fridge? Call up son-in-law jason to help out (s/o mom has him named like that in contacts in phone)

Perents kinda wonder where he lives, when s/o told them that he has vintage cottage in Forest they started to think that hes rich or something

S/o perents already hope that yall get married

Asa emory

My dude bought suit for that appointment

He promised not to talk about skinning people while yall are eating dinner. He is so dreamy

Got along very well with s/o's dad, they are talking about fishing or something idk what dads are into lol

Almost fell asleep when their mom was talking

I WANTED TO WRITE " when their mom was talking about that she wants grandchildren" BUT ITS SOUNDS WAY FUNNIER THAT WAY

He was scared to eat dinner, it looked.... suspicious... he never trusted cheesy lasagna

Anyways Asa and their dad are besties now, they will go fishing next week

He cried in car after meeting "S/O IM NEVER GOING THERE AGAIN IT WAS SCARY IF I HEAR YOUR MOM SAY ANYRGING ABOUT GRANDCHILDREN AGAIN IM GOING TO DOX HER SO HARD SHE WONT EVEN HAVE OPPORTUNITY TO SEE THEM"

I didnt write any headcanons for few weeks i hope it was good or at least readable

[itsmeeleanorstill]

Could you do Tim wright as a father figure hcs? Just like a father figure to an emo teenager hehe but they act all hyper. Like they r rlly rlly shy at first but then sarcastic and hyper when you get to know them✨

Authors note: i think you are the same person who requested the same thing on my other account and i remember saying no but am gonna put on my big girls shoes and stop begin a pussy and just do it am sorry if i misunderstood anything about your request

Warnings: nothing just me saying curse words but thats the usual

I think Tim would be the most fucking awsome dad ever

I think he would be a bit very akward with you if you are shy because he would not know what to do to make you feel better around him but hes trying all the time by asking you to come watch tv with him or just small things like that

When it comes to your style begin emo hes a typical parent and hes an old fashioned guy and i think almost all of the fandom agress with that he does not understanding your style and i dont think he would like your style eather but he would be suportive about it tho sometimes small comments on it but nothing bad just like

"Are you going out like that?"

Dont you need a haircut? your hair is basicly in your face"

"You gonna wear that out? Okay am just asking"

You begin sarcastic would anoy him a bit but he wont say anything about it he kinda does not have any right to say anything bad about the way you act but he will say sassy comments about stuff and you two would just say stuff to eachother like that as like a love languages and i think thats really beutifull

OVERPROTECTIVE DAD

He wants you to be far away from the whole operator shit and alex and everything

Also he works a lot but he tries to make time for you and just be there for you wich sometimes fails

He haves days where hes just way too tired and stressed to really say anything to you and just do anything basicly but you just need to give him time at those days

[blonde-tori-spring555]

ugh i hate when i feel on the verge of a panic attack

imma rant for a sec soz, u dont have to read the whole thing

...

im just so stressed rn, with school, family, friends and ive got like two auditions i need to prepare for and tbh i just feel anxious for no reason, i feel like im getting 'bad' again, like were i was just in my room and doing the same thing everyday and my brain hated that, and i just felt numb, like i dont think im depressed or anything like idk, i feel like i should explain what happened to originally make me feel like this, i wont go into full detail ect, but yeh

basically i was friends with this girl (we met at performing arts classes) and she i guess never rlly treated me amazing and was always slightly werid for example (not saying this is weird but from the way she is irl and they way she sounded seemed strange) so last year i was facetiming her and i was like "oh btw ive got a bf now", and she kinda seemed a bit Awkard, like her smile faded and she was just kinda like "oh thats great for u" a bit numbly (i should probs mention she isnt straight and for all ik she is bi) and then instantly changes the subject to "oh btw i was thinking of asking out-" and yeh we talked about it, anyway i spoke to my mum how i thought it was a bit weird and my mum said "oh hahaha maybe she has a crush on u" and im (pretty sure im) straight so like i didnt know how to react, anyway fast forward she started to act rlly weird and yeh, like kinda being a bit dramatic about stuff, anyway one week, this was in October, i didnt rlly text her because i was rlly busy, i was hanging out with my school friends and stuff, and i wanna say she could of text me and i would of responded, maybe not right away but i would of told her i was a bit busy if she had asked, but no, one of our friends told us she was upset that i hadnt been texting her and that i should, yk so i did, and she didnt respond, then she left our performing arts gc (with our friends in it from there) so i asked her why and two days later she responded saying she felt she didnt fit it, and at this point i was kinda sick of this drama so i was by choice not gonna text her for a few days and take care of myself, then one day while at school she send me a fucking video (like a capcut edit) basically calling me and my friends from theatre bad friends, and saying i need to send it to them, anyway i didnt and we told the woman that owns our company, and btw my mum knew the whole time, from when she started acting strange, and my mum was saying to the woman that owned the company, that she will call the poice if needed and if it has been sent out and posted (the video had my face in it), then she text me calling my mum stupid and calling me stupid so i blocked her, and after that i told her we are not friends and to leave me alone, then in December i repeated we are not friends but im not sitting here being pissed anymore so like forget about the shit and move on BUT WE ARE NOT FRIENDS, anyway this bs has been dragged on for like 5-6 months and she fucking keeps harassing me to the point ive had to block her on all platforms. anyway yeh :)

[meowzilla93]

Hello! I saw your rant post and I wanted to ask if we could get the context behind it? It seems kinda out of nowhere and I saw the tag list on tumblr and didn't saw anything negative towards any character. I also just want to know to avoid this person, I really don't want to interact with toxic people ://

Thank you for your answer

hello anon!

i hope you are doing well ᓚᘏᗢ

first and foremost, i won't be naming any names here. yes, my post was vague, and that was the point of it. because the truth of the matter is that no matter the fandom, this sort of behaviour is evident in all of them and i was calling it all out. identifying the people directly can cause more harm than good, and it is not my intention to victimize anyone.

it just so happened that recent events regarding a specific community pissed me off to no end this time round, and it was a long time coming.

in a way i am glad that you have not seen anything yourself from specific tags and the community, but the reality is that people who choose to target a set group or a set character and don't want blowback from it wont tag their posts to make them easily accessible. however, if you interact with enough blogs, basically the '6 degrees of separation' rule comes into affect, where blogs that interact with that fandom start to link to each other and you unfortunately will end up with a blog that doesnt align with your taste or morals on your feed and you get an unhealthy dose of toxicity from it

this happens on all forms of social media; where i have been seeing this kind of activity is more so on twitter, but it has happened here on tumblr too.

i do want to stress that when i do see this kind of toxicity i do block/mute them from my feed so i dont have to see it, but it doesnt stop it from existing. and then seeing how it affects the people around me because unfortunately its not so easy for them to get away from it, it just hurts me deeply

if you know my blog well enough, you know i am a massive fan of OLBA currently, and thats typically what i post, amongst other fandom stuff that interests me, however its typically OLBA.

the OL series is all about acceptance and understanding and openness with one another. discrimination, bullying, anything like that doesnt exist in the story and shouldnt exist in the fandom either.

its unfortunate to see that regardless of the type of community it should be, that negativity and toxicity exists regardless. as some one as part of the LGBTQIA+ community, i have unfortunately seen comments that are against what the community stands for. i have seen commentary that is essentially bullying of one account or a collective for the sort of content they produce. hyprocritical comments, calling out someone for their content but going ahead and making that content themselves.

if you have not seen this sort of activity, im grateful for it. truly, its not nice to see this kind of stuff, and if you do, blocking and muting it is the best option to avoid them and keep to the healthier side of the fandom

please note, this blog will always be an open blog, other than calling out this poor behaviour, the entire purpose of this blog is to be positive!

to share fics and and art and headcannons and thoughts about all characters in the fandom i am a part of, because i am trying to share the love i have for the series with others and have great discussions around them

i know this was a vague answer anon, but i hope you understand the reasoning behind why and wish you all the best

your friendly neighborhood kaiju,

ᓚᘏᗢ

[beedlemania]

How do you think the guys help baby Davy through impure regression?

Okay I’m not entirely sure I understand this ask but I looked it up and it said kinda self harm/in general not fun regression so that’s what I’m basing it off (but feel free to berate me if that’s not what you mean).

Okay so I believe Davy regresses due to his moving away from home, his mother passing away, his constant need to be seen as independent and strong. All of that’s a lot of stress on him so as a result he regresses, sometimes not willingly.

Sometimes his regression is kinda like a slap in the face, he doesn’t mean to regress but he can’t stop himself. This happens in high stress situations which for the monkees, usually means life or death situations. Davy will regress and he’ll try to warn the others but it’s difficult to get their attention when someone’s pointing a gun at them. This causes Davy to have some meltdowns because he’s frightened and he feels a bit useless since his big boy brain has kinda turned off and he doesn’t know what to do. Pair that with the fact one of the guys is probably missing or tied up or just not near him and Davy breaks down. Sometimes Davy also ends up regressing in front of one of his dates (since they are usually the source of trouble) and he wont be able to help himself from clinging to her or leaving her to run to the guys. He always feels ashamed after this because he’s supposed to be the man of the relationship and protect her but sometimes he can’t. He’ll always beat himself up for it after and it’ll put a damper on his regression and he’ll try to hold off regressing for awhile after until it begins to hurt him and the guys step in to kinda push him into that headspace.

Davy’s meltdowns look a bit different all the time. The causes can stem from being kidnapped to one of the guys (probably Micky) annoying him and pushing him a bit too far. Sometimes he’ll run to his bed and cry (if that options available) but sometimes it’ll be a lot worse. Like I mentioned before, I think sometimes Davy goes mute when he regresses which means it’s difficult for him to communicate what he’s feeling. Since he can’t verbally explain his big emotions they come out in outbursts. He’ll throw things or hit or start hurting himself by biting his nails too far or pulling at his own hair. If he gets too frustrated at breakfast the guys will learn that spoons are actually the most deadly of cutlery.

I think it’s hard for him to really hurt himself since one of the guys is always quick to jump in and help him. They’ll wrap him up in a strong hug, restraining his arms and stopping him from flinging himself around. They’ll pet his hair and sooth him and one of them with get his emotional security blanket to wrap him up. Some days it takes longer for him to calm down and Mike will sit with him all day and if Mike has to go do something Davy will be firmly attached to him. (Davy for comfort and Mike so he can watch over him).

I think in Success Story, Davy would’ve had impure regression. He’d have flashbacks to what home life was like and though he loves his family, it wasn’t a great time for him. His mother (his prime caregiver) passed away and his dad was sick so Davy was the ‘man of the house’. His sisters were old enough to be moved out or too busy with stuff to look after him and his grandfather expected him to be tough since he was moving away from home. Davy would’ve been terrified of going back to that life where he had to ‘man up’ and there’d be no one to look after him or know his cues or just let him be little. I think part of the reason he didn’t put up much of a fight against his grandfather is because he was floating between states of regression at the time. His thoughts were too much and his brain couldn’t focus so he was kinda halfway to regression. Because of that he found it hard to argue/stand up for himself. I think after his grandfather left he would’ve had nightmares about never seeing the guys again and never being able to fully be himself again and he’d take to sleeping with one of the other guys. He also would’ve regressed a lot further in this time period and become nearly fully mute and clingy and more baby than toddler.

The guys would pick up on that fully and coddle him and read to him and help him do things. Mike and Peter wouldn’t let him out of their sight for even two seconds. Micky would pull him around in a wagon as a joke to cheer Davy up (they both love it though) and would do silly puppet shows and whatnot to distract him from any bad thoughts he’s having. Peter brushes his hair and lets Davy focus on that feeling instead of letting his thoughts race and Mike will take him on walks and let Davy point out things to him to calm his brain. Davy will point to birds or dogs or a cloud or even just something someone’s dropped and Mike will hold his hand (once again, their neighbours are all kind of aware of how Davy is) and engage with his finds.

So overall, physically, Davy’s impure regression is never too bad because there’s always someone there to catch him and stop him from hurting himself (sometimes Mike just lets Davy hit him until all he’s tired himself out, to which Davy will feel extremely guilty after). But mentally sometimes it can be taxing but the guys always make sure he bounces back quickly.

[blackest-soul]

Fool for Falling | S.R. x You

Working for BAU, for the last three years has been a blessing and a curse. On on hand, the financial stability of having a stable job (albeit, one that is mentally and physically exhausting) is something that you can finally enjoy--- but honestly, nursing a crush on one of your co-workers for three fucking years is starting to get on your nerves. You definitely need an outlet to contain your crush on Spencer Reid and song writing has been a huge help. Taylor Swift has been a huge help, especially with the release of Speak Now, the ultimate album for crushes. For hopeless crushes and confessions. You gave a huge sigh and your best friend, Penelope, rolled her chair over to your side and asked you how you are. “I’m fine, Pen. Just a little bit tired and stressed. It has been a hell of a week and I still need to play at the bar for extra income.” You answered. Ever since you have mistaken Penelope Garcia as someone like you, a Filipina, you two have been inseparable. She gets you like no one else, so giving out lengthy answers to her simple questions has (and will always be) the norm.

“It is a Friday, babe. Don’t you want to skip playing for tonight and hang out with us?” Penelope asked. “The team is planning to go out for some drinks tonight and I have it on good authority that our boy genius will also join us.” She added with a wink. I’m pretty sure everyone in the team knows of my crush on Spencer, except for him. He can be a little dumb sometimes.

“I kinda need the extra income for tonight, loves. Student debt and all. Plus, I kinda wanna attend the Filipino Film Festival tomorrow, so I want to have some money to splurge on.” You shrugged. You turned around and started packing your stuff, including your guitar and started walking towards the exit when Pen stopped you.

“Hey, what if we hang out at the bar tonight? I want to hear you play, Y/N. Pretty please. I promise we wont disturb you too much!” Pen excitedly whispered. Not gonna lie, you were a little bit scared and nervous. No one in the team has seen this side of you plus singing your songs, with Spencer watching you. Isn’t that a little too much of a cliche? Whatever, you are late and you kind of want to hang out with them afterwards, so this is definitely a win-win. Whatever, you need a release. Singing your songs to Spencer Reid might knock some sense into him. “Okay, Pen. You guys can come at Lola Amour’s tonight. I need to go ahead and prepare for my set but I will see you there.” You said and walked away. As the elevator doors closed, you heard Pen’s squeal and immediately gathered the whole team to go to the said bar ------ At Lola Amour’s

“Hey” You greeted to the bar owner. “I have some of my friends coming over, can I reserve that table over there. Near the stage, but not near enough to get on my nerves.” “Yeah sure. Anyone in particular coming over?” Pio, the owner and another singer, asked. “A crush.” “Damn, Y/N! This set is gonna be so awesome. You know how long I waited for this day to fucking happen.” Pio smiled as he prepared the stage for both of our sets. “How many songs are you planning to play for the good doctor?” He probed. “Three, maybe four? I want to play that song. The one we wrote together. Fallen. Join me on the stage?”

“Sure! Been a while since we played that song. Pretty sure you wrote that...6 months since you met him” “Shut up! I did not!!” I half-whispered, half shouted to him. You saw the team coming in and you started to panic a little. Pio, the good friend that he is, saw your face and immediately knew. He has seen you have crushes before, but this one, Dr. Spencer Reid, is different. He has heard of the songs this guy has inspired out of you and as a musician, he is so fucking excited to see Y/N sing her heart out. “They are here.” You whispered.

“I know. Let me finish this set up while you greet them. Be fast tho, show will start in 10 mins and you will open.” Pio answered. “Y/N!!!!” Pen shouted as you come over their table. “This place is so amazing! I’m so pissed that you kept such a nice bar to us” “I know! I am so sorry but I sort of wanted to keep this place and my side gig a secret from the team for a while” I said as I try to apologize to the team for not letting them in sooner. “Hey, no need for those puppy eyes now. You need to be ready for your set. I demand some entertainment, Y/N” Derek said. I chuckled and tried to fix my hair as I try to gauge, Spencer’s reaction over this. He keeps looking around, maybe trying to see a different side of the world? A world where there is no violence... only art. And secret feelings. “I hope you guys would enjoy my set. The songs are really special to me so please be kind.”  You reminded them as I am walking towards the stage. “Don’t worry so much, Y/N. You will do great. You are already so amazing at many things.” Spencer said as he waves at me. You definitely do not need to overthink that statement. Get a grip, girl. You gave an awkward smile and even a more awkward wave. Jesus. ------- Start of Y/N’s Set

With the bar packed and everyone is served with drinks, Pio motioned for you to come up the stage to start. “Hey, everyone. Been a while since we last jammed together.” You said as the crowd cheered. Pio gave you a thumbs, indicating that you can say whatever your spiel is and that he will wait for your signal. “I am so excited to share and play some of my songs again, for you guys. I remember writing these three in particular, as I was nursing a very very very serious crush on one of my officemates. Luckily, the FBI is a fucking huge place so no one will ever figure it out, huh.” You continued your story and watched the reactions of your teammates. Hotch and Rossi raised their eyebrows, while the troublesome foursome (JJ, Pen, Derek, and Emily) gave some really really funny (and rude) finger guns and pointed at Spencer. Luckily, the resident genius is too oblivious or fascinated or maybe shocked to notice. This might be his first gig so you can’t be so sure. “Anyway, for this particular song... hmmm. I wrote this during the first year that we met. I remember debating if I should say something...about this crush. But then again, I got a little bit nervous and a lot scared. Hence, this song is my what if scenario. Everyone, this is Fallen.” The crowd cheered so loud, Pio’s guitar can barely be heard. What if I told you that I've fallen And I like the way you say my name? My heart skips a beat when I hear you calling And I like that it won't go away But never mind, don't wanna give you any trouble Never mind, never mind I'm OK with being by your side for as long as I can hide What if I told you that I've fallen? You started singing, Pio and the rest of the band continued playing on. Clearly enjoying the way you blushed and stuttered through some of the lyrics. Finally it’s Pio’s turn to sing the verse. What if I told you that I've fallen? The heart-shaped arrow through my chest I'll make your breakfast every morning And pick you up when you're a mess But I know that it won't ever stop You know I'll be there when you call me whether you like it or not Without a warning, now I'm falling for this picture on my phone But don't mind me, I'm just falling, I'll be back up on my own As Pio sings the next verse, you tried to observe Spencer. This song is really for him and honestly, you want to see his reaction. But due to the glare of the spotlight, you really can’t see any of his expression. You continued to sing the following lines, hoping, praying that Spencer will finally have the idea. After all, you really have fallen Please don't say my name, help me put out this flame I'd rather hold onto this feeling that you don't even believe in What if I told you that I've fallen? The song crescendoed through the chorus and last verse. You see some of the crowds cheering and singing along. You played this song before but this time it is different. You are playing the song with your muse in front, listening. You looked at your team again and saw them smiling (Hotch and Em), clapping, some of them trying to mouth the lyrics back to you (Derek and Pen), and some of them dancing through the chorus (JJ and Rossi) but you are honestly, just interested in Spencer’s reaction. Is that a blush you see? Is he hiding his smile? You can only hope so. The song ended and everyone cheered. Everyone wanted more and you decided to continue hyping the crowd up. “Wow, such a lovely crowd for tonight. So much energy. Let’s keep this up!!! Our next song is a crowd favorite!!!” The crowed cheered really loud this time as they hear the beat of the drums. “This song was written when I had too much wine. Jesus. I drank so much wine because Mr. Office Crush decided to shock my poor heart by not combing his curls. You know how hard it is to not run my hand over his hair. Ladies, understand, right?” The crowd collectively cheered and agreed as I try to narrate the story of how this song came to be. It was at a pool party, at Rossi’s. Spencer’s hair is all over the place and I remember getting a lot of wine because of it. I remember being tipsy and dancing with him. I remember a lot of laughter and giving Spencer lipstick kisses as a dare. “You guys know this song!!! So please sing with me. This song is called, Fools.” you shouted and began singing.  

Anticipating, waiting for the thrill I'm captivated, I don't know how I feel I'm suffocating, you seem so unreal And I can't keep waiting, so I'll go for the kill then I shiver (You say my name) it feels like fever Now it's got me begging You can do whatever you want to Baby, I'm no fool 'Cause even angels have demons on their shoulders too The band’s energy can really be felt through their instruments and you are  so excited to hype up everyone by playing the guitar even loudly while you sing the next parts. This is you favorite verse and you cannot wait for Spence to hear it: Relieve the tension, dance with me skin to skin I've no intention, but I don't see no ring It's a temptation and I wanna give in So forget your reasons, God gave the right to sin then I shiver

(You say my name) it feels like fever Now it's got me begging

You can do whatever you want to Baby, I'm no fool 'Cause even angels have demons on their shoulders too And you can say whatever you want to Baby, I'm no fool I know you want me like I want you too “Everybody stand up and dance!!” you shouted to the mic. The band really came through as they extended the instrumentals of the song, while you energetically jumped and down the stage. Damn, this feels like your very own concert and you love the energy the crowd is bringing. You tried to look for Spencer but his stare shocked you. You have never seen him give you this heated stare before. You grabbed the mic and sang the following lines while directly staring at his eyes:

You can do whatever you want to. Baby, I'm no fool. I know you want me like I want you too. I finished the song. Licked my lips and sent a wink to Spencer. I hope he gets it now. ---- Done for now. Let me know if you guys want a part 2 or POV from Spencer!!!

[rodismancave]

A reminder to new folks because I feel I need to say this. It's a few specific rules and more of a 'this is how i roleplay' thing. It kinda got away from me fast but alas, I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable for any reason so I just said what I feel i need to say to make that happen.

My muse is mean. It's usually nothing personal but he is Mean if provoked. There is a line and it is Thin.

This extends to his friends, mostly as a show of ease around them and as jokes, its just how he is. a little jokey joke. he says things without thinking and sometimes that leads to misunderstanding or an otherwise "cruel" comment. He normally doesnt mean it like that (unless he does)

this account is like 80% crack. i am here to have fun and be silly. if you take me seriously and get offended by it then I'm sorry but frankly, I have stated this many, many times. I do roleplay serious stuff, I do focus on a little bit of storytelling every once in a while, but for the most part I am silly and quirky. My portrayal won't always be 100% ic, sometimes a little ooc is healthy, for the bit. I stay committed to the bit, always.

Of course. if he's mean to your muse and you don't like it then you can let me know and I'll tone it down. I'll never be an asshole to people I dont know are 100% down to it or who aren't familiar with how my muse acts. However, sometimes being mean is in character with my muse and theres no other way around it. But the more intense, "i want to cause psychic damage" convos I will always ask if its okay for my muse to go hard on yours.

Rodimus is aware of the multiverse. This does not mean he's aware of the history of each multiverse. He may be aware of them, briefly, but he is really not going to dwell on it much and if you expect him to know it he just. wont. He doesn't really care all that much. This is also to say that he may confuse your muse for someone in his crew because of looking alike, and will treat you as such unless proven otherwise.

There are no people who are "canon" to Rodimus' crew, not at the moment. The only ones who I can say with confidence who are in his crew are @weavingmemoir and @stealthfeline, who are also my muses. This is for practicality. If your muse is part of the Lost Light crew in general, though (brainstorm, whirl, megatron, etc) you can respond to my lost light posts as if you were a member of his crew, I dont really mind. Like I said: commitment to the bit, always. The bit is always funnier when more people join.

Don't pretend like your muse knows mine and vice versa without talking to me first. This is mostly about muses outside G1 and IDW, or even people in IDW that Rodimus never really met, as well as OCs. It isn't really towards muses who HAVE interacted with Rodimus at least a few times. It is Awkward having to figure that out, and I'm not particularly a fan of having to dig around for people's relationships to understand what's going on between your muse and mine.

I don't really care if your muse is banging another Rodimus, or anyone else from his crew. Like I genuinely do not care, and neither does he.

I'll always make adjustments if you ask me to. I'll create new verses to fit with your muse, but that requires communication first and foremost. This also goes for events, if you want in on an event just talk to me and we'll see about it together. My events are never 100% thought out because I like leaving space for other participants to have a say in what happens. I just think its fun, like a group project (but less stressful)

When interacting with me I ask to lay off on the quirky colors and varying different fonts in one single reply. I have a lot of difficulty reading things like that and it strains my vision and it gives me a headache. Just, always have the same font throughout, and if there are different fonts, please let them be at least readable. The standard tumblr fonts are fine, except 'lucille', and the small font tends to me specially frustrating sometimes.

This is a g1/idw based blog. I take stuff i like from g1 and stuff i like from idw and i slam it together until I have something I like. Rodimus does not like the prime title, he does not miss being a prime, and he absolutely does not appreciate being called one, unless its doing things for his ego or to make himself look greater than he is. He is an Ass.

[pesterloglog]

Feferi Peixes, Eridan Ampora

Act 5, page 2467

cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

CC: W)()()()()(-E-E-E-E-EW.

CA: fef are you in

CC: Yea)(...

CA: that took forevver

CA: i wwas gettin wworried kinda

CC: Yes, it was a pretty close call, and got kind of complicated.

CC: But Sollux finally came t)(roug)(, and now I believe t)(e full c)(ain is complete!

CA: man that guy

CA: hes a fuckin drama machine it is fuckin pathetic

CC: YOUR STUPID FIS)(Y FAC-E IS T)(-E DRAMA MAC)(IN-E T)(AT DO-ES NOT)(ING BUT W)(IN-E AND GLUB.

CC: 38P

CA: fuck SORRY

CC: Anyway you s)(ouldn't say t)(at about )(im, )(e is a )(ero and )(e saved my life.

CA: yeah sorry

CA: i wwas just really wworried and stressed out i thought you wwere dead

CA: and i didnt evven get to thank you for savvin my life or really for anythin

CA: and i just spent all this time here wworryin and thinkin about stuff

CA: and i decided i havve something i wwant to tell you

CA: that ivve been meaning to get off my nub for a wwhile noww

CC: O)(, really?

CC: T)(at's good! Actually, I )(ave somet)(ing I )(ave been meaning to say to you too.

CA: wwhoa really

CA: uh

CA: wwhat is it

CA: you go first

CC: Mm, okay.

CC: But t)(is isn't easy to say!

CA: yeah i knoww

CA: its ok maybe i wwill understand more than you think

CA: wwe might evven be sayin the same thing

CC: Okay, I )(ope so.

CC: I t)(ink...

CC: Now t)(at we are bot)( in t)(is game, and )(ave left our world be)(ind...

CC: And you can no longer pose t)(e danger to our people t)(at you )(ad always planned to...

CC: I t)(ink it is not really necessary for me to be your moirail anymore.

CA: wwhoa

CA: wwait

CA: wwhat

CC: 38(

CC: I am really sorry, -Eridan. It )(as just been so )(ard looking after you and keeping you out of trouble!

CC: It )(as taken its toll, and )(onestly I am really ex)(austed.

CA: fuck

CA: this isnt what

CA: i dont knoww i wwasnt expectin this at all

CA: im not sure i can handle this

CC: I'm sorry!!! 38'(

CC: It will be t)(e best for bot)( of us. We can just sort of be...

CC: Regular friends instead.

CA: no

CA: please dont

CA: look im bein serious here dont do this

CA: i wont even use my weird accent while i type ok so you know im bein really dead serious and honest about this

CC: Uh...

CC: Okay, I am being serious and honest too. SEE?

CA: ok good

CA: are you sure you arent bein hasty about this youve just been through a lot

CA: i mean we are supposed to be fated to be moirails arent we

CA: isnt that how it works

CA: you cant just throw all that away cause youre sick of me

CC: I am not sick of you, Eridan! I still really like you.

CC: In order to be destined for moirallegience, both people have to be on board, don't you think?

CC: But I cannot do it anymore. So I think it just wasn't meant to be all along.

CC: And really, you just don't need me anymore. You are free to do as you wish! We both are.

CC: I can't look after you anymore.

CA: I DIDNT EVER NEED ANYONE TO LOOK AFTER ME

CA: i was totally fuckin fine my ambitions were noble

CA: and really none of your fuckin business QUITE FRANKLY your majesty

CA: and the only reason i put up with stickin my flipper in this fuckin shithole quadrant with you was

CC: Was what?

CA: nevermind

CC: Tell me!

CA: ok fine

CA: i apologize for losin my shit over this i was just caught off guard is all

CA: but maybe its a good thing really

CA: actually i might a been proposin the same thing to be honest

CC: Oh?

CA: yeah

CA: fef have you thought about

CA: since you dont wanna be pale with me no more

CA: the possibility a some other type of arrangement with me

CC: What do you mean?

CA: i mean

CA: somethin a bit more

CA: kinda reddish

CA: like

CA: brighter red

CC: 38O

CC: No, I hadn't thought about it!

CA: ok well what do you think about it

CA: now that youre thinkin about it

CC: Um...

CC: I really don't know about that.

CA: why not i thought you said you liked me

CC: I do! But I don't know if it's really in that way.

CA: couldnt it be though

CA: dont you think theres room in your collapsin and expandin bladder based aquatic vascular system for those feelins

CC: I've never had a chance to consider anything like that! I have just spent all my time worrying about you and trying to keep you from killing everybody or hurting yourself.

CC: It took all my energy.

CC: I don't think I have anything left for those feelings either.

CA: oh god

CC: What?

CA: im the biggest fuckin idiot who ever lived

CA: i cant BELIEVE i just opened up to you like a chump when i knew what was comin

CA: i am one sad fuckin brinesucker

CA: overemotional sappy trash youre right im not better than anybody

CA: im worse than anybody

CA: EVERYBODY

CA: all the bodies

CC: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!

CC: God.

CC: Will you just clam up for once in your life?

CC: Always carping and carping and carping!

CC: You go completely overboard with your emotions, always looking to reel in drama wherever you can.

CC: I am up to my gills in it! I just can't salmon the strength anemonemore.

CA: i cannot

CA: BELIEVE

CA: you are doin the fish pun thing while youre breakin up with me

CA: real nice

CA: whoops i mean REEL nice

CC: HEHEHE, sorry.

CC: But really, this shouldn't be as bad as it sounds.

CC: When all is said and done, I am still your friend.

CC: We have left our world behind. Everyone is dead, and there's no use in worrying about it now.

CC: It's over! It is time to play this game and focus on building something new and ------EXCITING.

CC: So )(ang in t)(ere, -Eridan.

CC: I )(ave to go now! Sollux is in serious trouble, and I )(ave to go )(elp )(im.

CC: BY------------------------E!

CA: wwait

CA: dont go

cuttlefishCuller [CC] ceased trolling caligulasAquarium [CA]

CA: glub

[fictionfixations]

part 2 of the new book 7 update cause i have more mystium

spoilers of course part 1

part 3 the final part

the way i just got the widest smile at this

anyway i forgot to mention it last post but knowing that they were just kinda left alone while everyone went to nrc makes me really sad. like first silver and sebek without lilia and malleus (they have sebbies family tho)

and then silver left next year. sebek all alone. he has his family still but like. man. gone for a year.

and in that time he was alone he got his signature spell and worked hard on it not wanting any of them to know about it until he got better at it, but it also meant that they never knew he could do that because they werent there and im just sad :( and it sometimes makes me wish at least silver and sebek were the same age so they couldve gone the same year and sebek didnt have to be without their company for so long

fshuidf i clicked past it like a dumbass but heres anther instance of baur saying he'll swallow them whole similar to sebek's battle start line

going to cry now because what the fuck 100k hp i hate myself my strongest units are really low hp BEAT THEIR ASS GEN LILIA oh my god they do so much damage im going to cry good news is i dont think theres another battle after this so this is.. fine.

and this time i didnt head straight to it and miss all the buffs from like the camps and stuff 💀 also i actually have more built cards this time before this i only had like one other casualty, that being the dorm sebek they give you (i only managed to have him duo off of gen lilia once and then i never got the spells to line up after that and then he died). so now its my whole team + dorm sebek thanking myself for leveling the spells of the other riddles i got that i did for no reason other then cause i like riddle (no intention of actually using them considering i already have a perfectly fine dorm riddle) LMFAO also thank battlemap for letting you bring a shit ton of characters. i havent used epel in forever 😭(rook is also VERY underleveled lmfao)

also im a dumbass i kept using the healing spells first turn.. ..but it didnt even do anything because i need to take damage first so its like. why did i do that. did i think id get my health lost in a previous battle back..?????

😱

aww the sparkles bruhs accomplished his lifes dream and i am here for it 👍

NOO GUYS LISTEN TO HIMM

he gave us his cloak 🥺

know i said id set my homescreen to sebek but... this feels more fitting

i wish that you didnt have to complete a book to get the backgrounds. i want my book 7 backgrounds with the music :(((

like i want. the the the. yknow when silver is confident in lilias love for him again and in the background you hear like i think once upon a dream? or i saw a prince(?? idk the other name for it its just what ive heard) and i. i want that. it also played when we see the dawn knight in the the the area where you travel across dreams where he smiled and then faded away

i dont have lilias room so silver will have to do

i need two more mystium aghhhhh the wait is insufferable but since im almost finished im gonna wait before posting

i watched someone go through the story on jp and i just remember stressing out so bad because holy fuck what happened what do we do. like i was feeling that stress of AHH GOTTA GET EGG AWAY and worry over maleanor but now i know what happened so im a little less stressed. im still stressed in the sense of FUCK YOU FUCK YOU BATTLES but like.. im not hanging in suspense anymore

anyway i think im gonna end it after battlemap is finished and do another post for the chapters outside of battlemap. especially because i dont want to hit the image limit. i cant remember if theres another battlemap but i dont THINK there should be.

anyway questioning why im making another post when i ended first post pretty early and couldve edited it? because people whove already seen it wont see it again 💀 and i mean if they wanna see book 7 stuff when the update only happened like 3 hours ago then ok ill show you what i can and make it visible enough for you to notice in the event youve already seen the other post

anyway while im waiting for one more mystium im warning you that if you cried the last update, to prepare to cry again. book 7 is just really sad man.

okay im gonna stop it here on THIS post (i will still be playing) and keep an eye out for part 3 with the rest (assuming theres not more story then i can make images of)

[apollonite]

Digital Catalog - 7 (9/19/24)

Yesterday I was up until 11:30 doing homework then I ended up falling asleep around 12:15. During that time though I was on VC with Caleb, Erin, and Mark. Caleb is one of my bestfriends’ (Matt’s) roommate. Matt and my other bestfriend Zach were on call with a previous friend Daniel and I could overhear what they were talking about a little. They made poly jokes and talked about break ups and it made me feel a little left out but they also have their own lives ya know. I would never even have a consistent thought about taking that away from them, I consider myself a very not toxic person in any regard.

After Matt and Zach got off VC with Daniel they came to the other one with me, Caleb, and Erin however I was literally just about to go to bed. Im glad I did end up going when I did.

Then I woke up 7 hours later to take my sister to school.

The recurring dream Ive been having happened again and I dont know why my mind wont shift trains of thought. Idk how much Im inclined to share about it unless specific people asked me.

In the morning my sister had on The Amazing World of Gumball which was super fucking cool. I havent seen that show in a while and I forgot how much I loved it. My breakfast was excellent today, if I could make it that way every time I would.

I matched with two people on separate dating apps which is exciting, but Ive been wanting to get off of them as of recent. I need to let myself be single at least for a little while unless certain people who already know about my situation are interested. I mean like sex is great and all, but idk if I want to be having it with people Im not super familiar with right now. Being single fucking sucks man, just let me live my poly life in peace please.

When I got to campus and parked I just listened to music for like 40 minutes then went to the bathroom then went to Stress and Strain. We actually did a really cool problem in class that I fully understood but was also above average on difficulty. We were going over Stresses caused by Torsion. There is one girl in my class and lab group that seems interesting to talk to, but she also gives off extremely white christian vibes with like an alt undertone and its strange. Her and I have a similar sense of humor I think but Im kinda seeing her as a fully platonic thing which is honestly not usual for me when freshly talking to people.

Next was Kinematics of Machines where we went over sliding mechanisms in a 4 pin 4 bar. It was pretty cool and more so reinforced what I already knew.

After that I went home and cleaned my car. I HAVE NO HOMEWORK DUE FOR A WHOLE WEEK! So I can finally dedicate time to cleaning my room, boxing up certain things from Jaime, and playing games/character building.

Im still unsure if I should get a special or non special box to put Jaime’s stuff in. Ill probably ask a close friend of mine about it.

Im also unsure if I want to go to the Goth Club I attend on saturday or not. I have no friends to go with and it kinda feels sad to go and drink alone. Idk, Ive never really been super social at events so Idk if its accepted or not.

[1eoness]

i loved hearing abt ur perspective on that matter 😭😭😭 not good with words but one thing i will say is most dead dove fics i see are from fandoms who preach abt problematic characters, its so rare to actually find any of them, like, this is just an example but everyone knows how famous hp is and ive read probably hundreds of fics (from ao3, which is kinda surprising since EVERYTHING is there, right?) and ive only ever come across one dead dove fic, which, again, i was startled bc i didnt even know what it meant so i think with warnings or none, it wont stop anyone from reading it. i guess i cant say anything abt how sa victims say its their own way to cope and it might be wrong to say this but i just think if a bad thing happened to me, why would i glorify it? and why would i ever want to influence people and make them think its normal and that they should want it too? its honestly just sad, especially, like u mentioned, when they say "a fictional character has no feelings" but theyre making leon an object of their sick fantasies, it sucks when all we get from them is "just block", followed by getting mocked, its just sad to see bc i feel like, how fucked up do you have to be to treat others like that? sure, maybe they have mental illnesses, but its like, theyre using it to justify their wrongdoings instead of actually trying to get better

anw... i dont know u much and i havent kept up with ur fics and stuff but i got to say i have a lot of respect for u and am looking forward to more of your works! or if not, i wanna say i admire u as a person 🫡

tw: mentions of dead dove, PTSD, mental stress disorders, trauma regarding SA. i understand! and thank you but you really don't have to praise me for saying this <3

i won't go on a whole ramble trying to deeply psychoanalyze these kinds of writers but to (attempt) to sum it up shortly: PTSD, and a lot of other kinds of stress disorders tend to corrupt you throughout your growth; it forces you into a kind of regression and when you're unable to get help for multiple kinds of reasons, you tend to turn to the internet because well, it's just a click away. when you feel like your only strength is your writing you will tend to "weaponize" it (but not really per se), then the result becomes... that.

it's i guess, what people commonly testify it as, "trying to regain control". which i don't doubt for one moment, i genuinely do think that people who write this kind of "fiction" are victims who desire a taste of control again. they wanna be able to twist their perceptions and perceive their trauma differently because they've been enslaved by it mentally. perspective matters here: what an expressed fantasy is to the viewer, may actually be a vent from the writer. [i cannot stress this enough. but if you're going to publicize this kind of stuff, you are still bound to public morality. so please stop ignoring the fact that dead dove content that pampers the concept of sexual assault is genuinely harmful. no one should ever write that in a way that perceives sexual assault as "desirable" and "a want".] otherwise, any kind of writer who glorifies and makes market-focused art out of sexual assault are sick and they know who they are, they just don't want to take accountability for it. i always think there's a better choice to be made.

[forestryfae]

i dont. understand. when are they expecting us to be able to do laundry. i have an hour in the morning i guess but i physically cant get myself out of bed unless its absolutely the last minute and they dont wait for you to hang up your laundry, theyll just drive away from you.

theres also an hour right after i come home from work but generally i need it to change clothes or shower and to regain some of my energy.

after dinner theres like 2 hours but jesus christ i JUST got back from work and i share laundryday with another guy, i have no idea how much laundry hes gonna do

then theres a meeting every other monday and a dumb bullshit hike that takes like 2 hours then were back around 7:30 or 8 i think and generally after a long tiring hike where noone waits for you so you dont get even one break even tho your legs are burning there isnt much energy for laundry. and then theres that one meal we get afterwards as a reward or whatever for the hike and then at 9 they lock the laundryroom.

so theres like 1 and a half hours there too ig but who has the fucking energy. we need showers too. and to eat. so like yeah theres like a few hours here and there and one load of laundry takes half an hour with the big machine but thats still a very tight schedule. esp considering they REALLY want us to go on the hikes cus its An AcTiViTy ThAtS gOoD fOr YoU.

like. i have limited energy and i only have so much time in the day. i can only do so much in one day before i run out of energy and i need to be allowed to be tired and need to rest too. i dont function well on tuesday evenings specifically because im exhausted. its why i take wednesdays and fridays off. i need the extra rest and time. like. idk how to even explain it without sounding lazy and whiny and kinda pathetic for not being able to do a million things a day back to back. but i actually need time to decompress and shit. idk.

the point ismondays are a shit day to do laundry, i dont want to do it on wednesdays cus i like to have time off but im expected to clean my room the millisecond i wake up and im more often than not woken up with "good morning, what are you going to do today, i think you should do laundry and cleanyour room" like thanks now i cant get out of bed until 12 and i cant do anything i was planning to do cus yall wont stop fucking pestering me if i dont do whats expected of me every single minute im alive, and they never fucking check when i actually do clean and usually cleaning my room results in 'you missed a spot'. like why even botver. its so fucking stressfull and i dont know how to stop bekng stressed and when people try to help they make it worse and itpisses me off so much, i hate having people mess witvmy stuff and moving shit around and touching fucking dirty clothes then moving clean stuff.

like jesus christ im allowed to be tired. i need to be allowed to have hobbies and free time that doesnt result in my brain being occupied by being pissed cus someone told me what im Supposed to do instead of just allowing me to fucking do what i need or want to do. like can i get five fucking minutes where i dont feel guilty cus i dont shower fast enough or i dont mop the floor fast enough and i dont walk fast enough and im not strong enough to just do shit without ever getting tired or needing rest.

were not even doing real therapy rn, i wanted a psychologist and i still havent gotten one, i wanted to talk to the economics guy and i still havent been able to, i cant talk to anyone who isnt my primary contact and i have no idea how to even reach out to her plus shes not always working so i dont always see her, and like. a lot of the time i feel like whatever i say is just Too Emotional and its not actually worth the time but my guy my parents have been treating me like i dont deserve to exist in front of them since i was a fucking toddler and when i got bullied in school my parents thought that was my own fault for getting angry that i was being treated like shit. i didnt fucking grow up with people who cared about me unless it suited them, im fucking allowed to be upset and confused and terrified and worried about shit. it makes perfect sense that i dont understand any fucking thing and im struggling so fucking much. i should be getting help and getting rid of the shitty fucking house and getting diagnosed and maybe even medicated. i should be in fucking therapy and i should be talking to SOMEONE about shit instead of sitting in my room crying every weekend cus i dont know whats wrong with me and im starting to get worried that im just too fucked up to be fixable or atleast able to be liked by people

in other news the laundrymachine was taken and theres stuff hanging to dry cus the people working here did laundry today and now i have to wait until saturday and i have like 2 tshirts and 2 pants and one bra and one sweater thats clean and that will not last until monday

[wynteol]

Rant : When will it end ???

Just before I begin , this rant is related to a foot pain I've been dealing with since early July ( July 6 or 7 ) that's STILL ongoing , even if it's getting better now ...

It's been a whole fucking month and it seems to be getting better but oh wait , it might come back again because my body says to me ' ha ha ha fuck you , you've been sitting funny , you haven't been working out lately , etc ... enjoy some pain ! " . I don't know what it is , I know I dealt with it before in the past , it goes away after a few days / weeks but it's August now ... and I am STILL dealing with it . THIS TIME ON BOTH FEET . Yeah that'll show me that I need to work out more or stretch more , OF FUCKING COURSE IT DOESN'T MAKE ME WANT TO MOVE , THE PAIN IS AWFUL ! It feels like something broke even though it's all fine . It's just my body being stupid as hell . This week yeah it's getting better and it's just about gone in one foot ( my left foot by the way , the foot that started all of this by the way ) .

I actually had a perfect routine to improve my physical ( and maybe mental health ) . I'd go out and exercise ( mainly walking or maybe go to the gym , which because of the pain , I am wasting a lot of money on and I am unable to go for once because of the pain ) , I do something else for a bit , then I stream for awhile , I do other stuff before bed and then I go to bed . That's my day that I kinda planned out . CAN'T DO THAT NOW until this fucking pain goes away .

Oh and I can't go to the clinic or hospital due to ... personal reasons that involves the united states being a totally normal and affordable country to go to the hospital to and it WONT result in me going into the negative ... yeah fuck the US on this . Why are we so allergic to a universal healthcare ? Anyways this isn't me venting about the US , I could do that another time . I just wanted to give a reason why I can't just go to the hospital to figure out what the hell is wrong with my body and if there's someway I can make it better in no time at all . It's just the cost , that's all .

I've iced my feet , I've taken medicine which has helped ever so slightly , I've elevated my feet to varying levels of success , I've done all I can think of and while yes it is getting better ... I just want to ask ... WHEN WILL IT END ?

I just want to be able to walk and not worry about pain for the rest of 2023 . I am trying to make a difference with my physical health . It's harder for me but I am trying my best . Which by the way , I should mention that if I am snappy ever on a voice chat or on stream ... it's a mixture of stress from the 2020s and this pain .

That is all . I try not going on rants much , even rarer for me making it public but oh well , I've mentioned this pain so many times before that I might as well make a post about it here .