#it wasn't just mindless habit it was a choice i was making over and over

[dollfat]

sometimes i miss my stupid gacha game but then i remember it wasnt a fun game in my free time it was a literal job that expected me to clock in multiple times a day or i would hurt my alliance's score and i would save up gems for months for one specific summoning event and not get the hero i wanted and the one time i worked my ass off to finish a tower and got the exact middle prize of like 25 gems and THEN they introduced a new level cap with resources requirements to unlock and then literally just. sold them. for money. and ofc people bought them and their power level was suddenly 500 more and my highly curated and leveled up team was weak sauce. and they kept advertising a new journey of the west themed chapter but if you didnt buy their $100 battle pass before the event you could NEVER unlock the icons for completing levels.

.

[kteezy997]

The Candy Man-Part One// W.W.

Warnings: Smut, mention of masturbation, male receiving oral sex, virgin Wonka, cowgirl, missionary, some dirty talk, curse words, cream pie, female receiving oral sex, oh and cheating on spouse A/n: I have not seen Wonka yet, so there are NO spoilers here!

As a young housewife, there wasn't much for you to do. You had done the housework for the week and done all the grocery shopping, and it was only Wednesday. This would make for a long, boring week.

It would be different if you had a child to look after, but sadly, that hadn't happened yet. And it may never happen if your husband continues to show such a low interest in sex. Sometimes it felt like he forgot you even existed.

You wished he would just give you a baby, if he didn't want to give you attention. That way you'd have not only something to occupy your time, but you'd also have someone to love, and for someone to love you. You weren't even sure if your husband loved you anymore. Your relationship wasn't the same as when you were first married two years ago.

These days, all you really wanted was for him to come home, rip your clothes off, and fuck you like he hadn't seen a woman in years. You wanted to feel desired, so badly. You had recently picked up a habit of touching yourself sexually while your husband was away at work. You were so starved.

.....

Autumn had come and gone by this time of the year and it was becoming quite frigid outside. With winter well on the way, you turned on your fireplace in the living room. You didn't really care for the bear skin rug that your husband insisted on having in front of the fireplace, but it wasn't worth the fight to try to get rid of it.

With the fire going, you snuggled up into a cozy sweater and put on some mindless radio station to fill in the silence of the empty house. As you listened to the radio and did some mild tidying about the room, you wondered if you should maybe get a dog, or maybe a cat.

Then the doorbell rang, that's weird. You thought. You seldom had any visitors during the day. You walked over and opened the door.

"Hello, Miss. My name is Willy Wonka! Would you care to sample some of my chocolate on this fine day?"

"Fine day? It's freezing out there," you said as you were awestruck by this man's beauty, his bright purple coat and milk chocolate-colored top hat added a sort of zany zest to his attractiveness. "um, would you care to come in and warm up for a minute?" you said politely, nodding to his briefcase that you assumed was filled with sweets, adding, "I do love chocolate."

"Why, yes, if you're sure you don't mind." he smiled, and his green eyes were dazzling.

"No, I don't mind at all, sir."

Willy took his hat off, and his curls fell downward in a bit of a mess as he stepped into the warm home. "Thank you, I didn't get your name."

"Oh, I'm y/n. Please, sit down, the fire is going."

"It is quite toasty in here, thank you, y/n." Willy said, taking a seat on the couch closest to the fireplace. “Very interesting choice of a rug, y/n.” he chirped.

“Oh that? My husband insisted on it, it’s so dreadful. But it is rather soft.”

“Hm.” he nodded looking at the luscious, dark colored fur on the floor. He then looked at her, cheerily, “So, would you like to try some?” He picked up his briefcase.

“Of course.” you said with a smile, truly wanting to try some of him instead, but you’d give his candy a chance for now. He was so damn handsome. His hair was gorgeous, you wanted to run your fingers through it, maybe even pull it.

He opened his briefcase in his lap, letting you choose which candy you wanted.

You picked a piece of chocolate, and he told you the name of it, and its special ingredients. You listened to him, but ultimately got lost in his innocent yet sexy eyes. You bit into the treat, and it was rich and velvety sweet as it melted in your mouth. It was absolutely delicious. The best candy you ever had in your life.

“Mr. Wonka, this is perfection, it’s absolutely divine.”

Willy smiled widely, “I’m pleased to hear it. I have only ever hoped that each person that tries my chocolate will have that same reaction.”

He was so genuinely confident and excited about his creation. The passion he had was evident.

“I’ll take every one of this flavor that you have, Mr. Wonka.” you said, taking another delicious bite.

“Wonderful!” he exclaimed, “And please, call me Willy.”

“Willy.” you said, softly. You wanted to moan his name. But how to get there? You improvised. “Um, why don’t you stay for a bit longer? I can put in a pot of tea, if you’d like.”

“That sounds lovely y/n, or should I call you Mrs…”

“Oh, it’s Mrs. Hudson, but you can just call me y/n.” you insisted, hopping up and going to the kitchen heating up some tea. You had to have this man. Cheating was wrong, but your husband would never, ever know. He never wanted sex anymore, but you couldn’t go without it like he did. You were so needy, especially now, after meeting the handsome Mr. Wonka.

You had plenty of time to have Willy fuck you and send him on his way with his payment for the chocolate, all before Mr. Hudson got home. You would have to make Mr. Wonka an offer he couldn’t refuse, much like you couldn’t refuse his delectable sweets.

You carried two cups of steaming, aromatic tea, one for you and one for Willy. You hoped it would warm him up properly.

“Here you are, sir.”

“Why thank you, very kindly, my lady.” he took the teacup from you, and you felt weak in your knees when your hand was briefly brushed by his fingers. You watched as he carefully brought the rim of the cup to his lips, taking a small sip. “Mm, that’s quite good. A perfect cup of tea, y/n.”

“Thank you. I’m glad you like it.” you said, sitting down next to him and taking a sip for yourself. You didn’t know how to get this man naked; you weren’t finding any viable option that wouldn’t be too crude or forward. You felt you were running out of time. You couldn’t let him leave with the risk of never seeing him again. This delightful, beautiful man could not escape you.

“Well, this has been quite the pleasure.” he said, in a farewell tone. He took one last sip of his tea.

You haven’t had the pleasure, yet.

“But I will get out if your hair,” Willy stood up, continuing, “and go about my merry way. Thank you for your-"

“Wait! Willy-" you shot up to your feet as you spoke but couldn’t finish a sentence. You just started into his eyes.

“Yes?” he asked, frowning at you, utterly confused by your behavior.

You didn’t have the words, so you threw yourself at him, kissing him hungrily.

He took ahold of you, and pulled away from the kiss, “Y/n, are you mad?”

“Oh, god! I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”

“No, it is alright. It was kind of…nice.”

“Yeah? Mr. Wonka, I had an idea of pleasing you the way you pleased me with your chocolate. If you’ll indulge me?”

He raised his eyebrows, “I have to say, I’m intrigued.”

You put your hands on his chest, making him sit back down on the couch. Your hands then went to his fly.

“Whoa! What are you doing?” he asked, panicky.

“Shh-sh. Relax, Willy. Do you like me?”

“Ye-yes.” he trembled with nerves. “I find you very pretty.”

“I really like you. Have you…ever been with a woman before?” You rested your hands on his upper thighs, dangerously close to his member. It was visible through his trousers although he wasn’t even hard yet.

Willy shook his head, “No, ma’am.”

“Awe, don’t be scared. I’ll take care of you, okay. Do you want that, Willy?” You ran your hands slowly around the outline of his cock.

He gulped, watching your hands on his pants, “Yes, I think I would really like that.”

“Good.” You beamed, unzipping his trousers, and pulling his cock out. He was much thicker and longer than your husband. You were excited about being Willy’s first. You wet his cock with your tongue, and sucked him, moaning and slurping as you did so. You wanted him so bad; you sucked his cock like your life depended on it.

A string of “oh oh oh”’s and “mmm’”s fell from Willy’s mouth as you worked over his cock. He writhed on the couch and placed a hand on your head.

He was hard as stone after a moment, and you had been wet since he sat on your couch the first time. “Oh, Willy. Do you feel good, my sweet?”

“Yes,” he panted, his eyes glazed over, “very good.”

You stood up, and dropped your underwear to the ground, kicking them elsewhere. Then, you mounted him. His hands instinctively went to your waist. You reached down, placing his member between your folds. You sank down on him, feeling the intense stretch of your vaginal walls. You moaned in a slight pain initially, because his was larger than your husband, and you had never been with anyone else.

“Are you alright, y/n?”

“Oh, yes, darling, just give me a moment.” you adjusted, and then started to bounce in his lap.

Willy watched you in wonder and awe, then he’d look down to watch your pussy envelope his cock. “Haa, this is incredible.” he moaned, gripping your hips harder.

You quickened your pace. Sinful wet sounds came from your pussy. God, you needed this. The friction alone was titillating, but the tip of his cock would hit your cervix every so often and it was bliss, the whole scenario.

"Oh, y/n!" Willy cried your name over and over again. His hands explored your clothed body, groping your curves.

Damn, it felt so nice to be touched, and his hands were surprisingly big, and he knew how to use them.

You held yourself up with your hands on his shoulders, and slowly rocked back and forth on his cock. You noticed him eyeing your chest. "Unbutton my blouse, Willy."

He bit his lip with an eager gleam in his eyes, and he opened up the front of your blouse, letting your breasts plop out in his face.

Willy's eyes widened, he took his eyes away from your tits to look up in your eyes, "May I feel them?" he asked with a soft whimper.

"Yes, absolutely." you huffed, taking his hands and clapping them onto your naked breasts.

He gently squeezed and kneaded your breasts, then rolled your nipples between his fingers.

He was so sweet, and so curious about your body. It was so hot. You wanted to get off, you hoped to cum all over his dick. You held onto his arms firmly and rode him hard. His cock pounded away at your walls wildly, and you contracted your pussy around his girth.

"Ah! Fuck this is so good! I'm gonna...I'm gonna come!"

"Oh, oh!" Willy held your waist, and you felt his cock twitch inside you.

Your tummy swirled, and your legs went limp as you came.

"What's happening?" Willy cried, "What is this?" You felt him shoot ropes of his milky cum inside of you.

You took his worried face in your hands, "You're alright, my candy man. You had an orgasm. It's a wonderful thing."

"Oh," he panted, "yes, I suppose it is. A fantastic thing! Gosh, y/n, that felt like chocolate tastes, and chocolate is the best thing in the world!" he was so excited, like he'd discovered something that no one else had experienced before.

You giggled, "Well, I'm flattered, Willy." you felt hot and sweaty, you ran your hand down the back of your neck. You felt Willy's eyes on your tits.

"Your breasts, they are absolutely beautiful." he took them in his hands, just admiring the fullness of them.

You felt your pussy throb at the sight. Your husband never paid much attention to your body, but Willy seemed to be enthralled by you. You noticed how the glow of the fire highlighted his cocoa-colored curls. It was so pretty, his hair looked like the work of a master chocolatier. You ran your fingers through it, feeling the silkiness of his glorious mane.

"Can we do it again?" he asked you, then nodded to the floor, "There? On the bear skin rug? It would be comfortable for you."

"You're so thoughtful. Fuck me again, Willy Wonka. Pound me into the floor if you must."

Willy smiled like a kid on Christmas morning and hoisted you up and then carefully placed you down on the rug.

The fur was plush and soothing on your back. You put your arms up by your head to get comfy.

Willy ran his hands down your body. He looked at you like you were a gift he had been waiting for. "You are so beautiful. Your husband does not know how lucky he is."

"That's sweet, Willy, but let's not mention my husband."

He nodded, "Right." Then, he dipped down, pressing his lips to your stomach.

"Mm." you moaned, rubbing your thighs together in anticipation. You could feel Willy's semen dripping out of you. You wanted more.

Willy left small wet kisses down passed your navel, lower and lower, and you couldn't help but push his head down where you needed him most.

"How do I do this, y/n? Is it like... licking a lollipop?" he asked, naively.

You smiled at him and said, "Yes, kind of. Like a sucker with a chewy center...but you're not in a big hurry to get to the center. You're just trying to enjoy the flavor on the outside."

He took a second to ponder over what you had said, then he nodded, "Okay, got it."

He was a quick learner. He lapped steadily on your clit; his pacing was perfect, not too fast, not too slow. He must have had lots of suckers in his life.

"You can use the tip of your tongue also, Willy." you whimpered through the pleasure.

"Oh, okay." he answered, his voice muffled as he didn't move away from your pussy as he spoke.

The vibrations from his voice sent tingles through your body. That coupled with Willy massaging your clit with his tongue and letting the tip dance between your folds, led you to your second orgasm. You cried out in ecstasy. "Willy Wonka, you are a god!"

"No, I'm just a chocolate maker." he said, nonchalantly. He then sat on his knees, his hand around his cock. He ran the tip of his cock along the joint of your wet folds, coating himself in your cum.

"Ooh." you moaned, tucking your fingers into the furry rug as firmly as you could.

Willy slid into you, then back out. "Ha, you're so wet."

"Fuck me hard, Willy." you purred.

With that, he shoved his cock into you, bucking his hips roughly. His hips smacked your skin with each thrust. He put his whole length into you. He gripped your thighs and started to get faster.

You squeezed him with your thighs, and he grew more confident in what he was doing and picked up a rhythm. You watched his handsome face scrunch up as he worked his hips, his thick brows furrowing in both pleasure and concentration.

You wondered what your husband would do if he knew that the candy man stopped by and made you come on the bear skin rug he loved so much. Oh, the risk was worth it! For Willy was perhaps better at sex than making chocolate.

@gatoenlaciudad @thebetawolfgirl @musicandbooksaremyhappyplace @softhecreator @tchalamss

@chalametbich

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Living Weapon Whumpee part 12

Warnings: forced living weapon/fighter, war, bleeding & bullet wounds, several deaths, hostage situation, held at knifepoint

...And the tide slowly began to turn. Whumpee was giving Flint's soldiers a fighting chance.

He was drenched in blood from himself and his enemies, chest heaving as he dispatched enemies left and right, an unstoppable force of death. A terrifying sight, a glorious one.

The fight started thinning, until a single frightened voice cried out that Whumpee instantly recognized.

"Whumpee!"

He whipped around, teeth bared, spotting Myra against the wall a few meters away from him -- being held at knifepoint. And an even more terrifyingly familiar voice came from her current captor.

"Weapon, HALT!" The booming command came. And Whumpee obeyed, freezing stiff before his brain could even catch up. Time seemed to slow to a crawl as his gaze traveled from Myra's scared face -- to Leader's, who held Myra in front of her like a shield with a short blade to her neck.

Another stray bullet tore through Whumpee's shoulder in a spray of scarlet blood, making him hiss, but he didn't even blink, frozen in place.

"Weapon, what is the meaning of this?!" Leader roared furiously, face twisted with rage. "How did Enemy get control of you?!"

Of course Leader would see it like that. That Weapon could only be controlled, have no free will of his own. That he couldn't function at all without a handler.

Whumpee growled low in his throat, taking a stiff, menacing step forward, then another, and another, blood dripping from his daggers. His eyes were wild and feral, dilated with adrenaline from the fight. "Let her go," he snarled viciously, fire in his eyes.

Leader had the audacity not to flinch when faced with the lethal predator he had trained to be Weapon. "Weapon, STOP," he ordered harshly.

And again, Whumpee's body obeyed, no longer moving closer, the conditioning engraved deep into his being, tied to every muscle. It was hard to resist something coiled so far into his core, years of training creating the overwhelming habit to listen and obey and take orders. It wasn't even a conscious movement, it was as instinctual as breathing.

"Weapon, I will forgive you for this accident if you make the right choice now. I won't even punish you for it when we get back to my base," Leader spoke slowly, deliberately, eyes hard and sharp as steel.

"No... Punishment...?" Whumpee echoed distantly.

Leader gave him a saccharine smile. "No consequence. I'll let this slide, but you need to use your training and complete your mission, remember? Or have you forgotten something?"

Whumpee's first instinct was to pounce on the opportunity to earn mercy from Leader -- it was rare for him to offer a way out of additional pain. But he firmly reminded himself that it was his choice this time. Leader's image of power was a false illusion right now. Because Whumpee -- Weapon -- wasn't a mindless machine anymore.

He was tempted to go back, the familiarity of not having to think for himself, just having to follow Leader's commands and knowing it would all be okay. Going rogue was new to him, an unknown sensation that made him uneasy and made his skin crawl. He lacked direction, and Leader could give that to him again.

But Myra -- Myra was in imminent danger.

...Why did he care again?

A whole war was raging inside Whumpee even as the fight continued around him, his world narrowing to focus on Leader and Myra. His conditioning was taking over again, making him forget everything but obedience and submission. He was viscerally aware of it creeping into his thoughts, tainting them, triggered by seeing Leader again. The thick fog that crept back into his head, muddling his willpower.

Leader's smile widened at the suddenly flat, vacant look on Whumpee's face, the dissociation setting in. "Weapon, protect and escort me out of here," he ordered. He could tell his men were losing against the remainder of Flint's fighters now, and Leader was a coward who wouldn't risk his own life. He needed to escape while the rest of his men died, regroup and make a new plan now that he had Weapon back.

"Yes, Sir," Whumpee mumbled, and walked over to him.

"Whumpee, help me," Myra sobbed, trembling with fear in Leader's grip, the knife still held to her fragile throat. "Please help me..."

Whumpee tuned out the vicious fight going on behind him, the screams of pain and panic as the two sides tore each other apart with bullet and blade. He only had one mission now…

⏪️ Back Next ⏩️

Masterlist

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @i-don't-know-sal @togzy

@whump-till-ya-jump @cravesunconditionallove @whumpwritinglover222 @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl

[liliallowed]

I wonder how Dust sans is doing. Is he okay? I hope he's doing well :(

nope :3

he paced back and forward around the room cringing onto his hood.

he had to suppress the urge to gut a random human right there, knowing FULL well the habit he had wasn't going to benifit him in tracking down that THING.

the room was trashed. cracks forming on the walls from the sheer pressure if his gravitational magic, broken glass scattered all over the floor that he mindless paced over, uncaring if it chipped at his hp or not.

"where?"

he muttered as he scratched his hand on the sofa as he passed by, causing another tear.

"I'll kill them I'll kill them I'll kill them both... I should have killed them earlier... if that demon turns them into their exp I'm going to fucking RIP it OUT THEIR DAMNED INSIDES... IM GOING TO FUCKING KILL THEM..."

he clenched his first, suppressing more of his anger.

/told you you shouldn't have played with your food brother/

"FOOD!? WHAT KIND OF SICK FREAK DO YOU TAKE ME FOR!? THEY DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE IN THIS! THE LEAST I COULD DO WAS GIVE THEM A SENSE OF WARMTH BEFORE I GOT RID OF THEM!"

/Isn't that crueler? it hurts more to be betrayed by someone you trust rather than a stranger. "I WOULD KNOW."/

"i..." his eyelights shrank.

"yeah... my bad... should've just killed them from the get go huh..." he facepalmed.

"they just... they looked so scared about all that... I didn't want to... if I did that from the start they would have ran. I COULD HAVE EXTRACTED THEIR WILL IF THAT BRAT DIDN'T INTERVENE-"

/you're GLAD they did though aren't you you hypocrite? =)/

/you're attached? don't worry you'll meet the next run!/

"no. NONONO. I'm going to forget and they'll fucking live with this memory... I have to take out their soul before they die. I CAN'T let that SICK FREAK GET ANOTHER DAMNED PUPPET. WHY DIDN'T THEY LISTEN. WHY DIDN'T THEY JUST FUCKING LEAVE!?"

/reckless and stubborn. reminds you of someone?/

"SHUT up shut up DO NOT FUCKING COMPARE THOSE TWO THAT THING ISN'T EVEN HUMAN."

/excuses excuses. you're trying to twist things. don't forget what you DID TO US. YOU DON'T GET TO make exceptions./

"I know. I'm not... "

/worst case scenario they'll just know your true nature and you won't even get close next reset/

/but you don't want to forget. those memories are too sweet to loose aren't they you selfish murderer? trying to pretend like you deserve any of it?/

"I don't... I know... yeah. it was all just going to end this way anyway. I was just dragging them along pretending to... yeah. yeah it's fine. I'll kill them... yeah... it'll be like another... hehe yeah... just another one. it's no different." he muttered as his hands dug further into the tears of the fabric.

would he kill them if given the chance?

he would. he had done this so many times. if course he would do it. again... and again. maybe this was his karma? have someone see this side and judge HIM INSTEAD. to be the one hating HIM instead.

fitting really. he deserved no better.

it's not like he had any other commitment to cling onto. or an objective to keep himself somewhat sane...

"enough screwing around... where is that brat hiding them..." he muttered as he teleported on top of a building.

the city wasn't easy to map out... but he could work with it. they couldn't have gone far.

"I'll make you regret this brat."

[normalbrothers]

under the cut because it's not that serious, but hdh the tags motivated me to ramble on this sunny saturday

#alfie is jealous#that's the thing that's going on#he WANTS arthur to be an idiot because he wants to be the only one on tommy's level having a special bond with tommy#that's my theory anyway

@morning-alfie

i honestly don't think alfie understands either tommy or arthur or their relationship enough to be jealous. arthur gets introduced to him as an easy target for alfie's particular affinity towards gleefully needling others - he's overly nice to alfie and anxiously tries to do everything Right during the pesach fiasco, because he's been fumbling the bag all season and doesn't want to further disappoint tommy or otherwise jeopardize the business (tommy called him out for carelessly spending a lot of money on cocaine in london while the police there was more violently cracking down on everything criminal; it's a pretty reasonable critique all things considered), alfie isn't privy to any of this, though: he just sees an eager, highly manipulable and extremely emotional fool who tries too hard and who alfie plans on betraying, and this sets the tone of their dynamic. and alfie isn't a particularly kind man; as i've said, it's very clear that he likes to poke and prod at what he perceives as exploitable cracks and weaknesses (maybe as a way to camouflage his own, who knows) and arthur happens to wear these very openly on his sleeve, but it's not really about him having enough regard for arthur as a person to see him as a potential rival for tommy's affections (? there might be a better word for it). even when he toys with arthur during the meeting in s3, what he says holds little truth. it's a lot of blabbing about arthur's mindless loyality/devotion to tommy as if in that very season he isn't making his own choices that very much go against what tommy asks him to do (that doesn't mean that arthur *isn't* devoted to tommy, but alfie's evaluation is wrong; arthur is capable of having his own thoughts, has always been, in fact). it's a lot of bullshit and alfie's primary motivation is to just see where this is going - it's about tommy's reaction to all of this, moreso than arthur's (frankly completely justified) rage over what happened to him. arthur is, just like what happens in s2, collateral damage to alfie, nothing more. in alfie's eyes there's nothing to be jealous over, because, i assume, he erreneously believes tommy shares this opinion on arthur. my post is a little too vaguely phrased and wasn't really meant to go any deeper than voicing my annoyance with some tommyalfie fics having this habit of alfie's judgment being a truth tommy cosigns (i should have made that clearer). but tommy does not see arthur as an idiot, nor as expendable, nor as collateral damage. if there might have been doubts about this in s1 and s2, i think s3-s6 are very good at deconstructing that notion.

#arthur comes off like an idiot#but only bc he's one of those characters whose depth is not immediately apparent#and perhaps also bc of Tommy's habit of treating him like a mad dog to be sicced on people when convenient and otherwise largely ignored#unless he happens to be causing trouble#so it's unsurprising other non-Shelby characters see him that way at least at the outset#it's actually kinda heartbreaking how earnest he is underneath the loud voice and the coarseness and the violence#partly still the little boy that just wants to draw horses

@capnmachete

there's a difference between audience perception and how characters within the show see each other/interact with each other, i think. while arthur's initially framed as angry, a bit of a buffoon and seemingly less capable than tommy, we are very quickly shown the other side of him: that he's troubled and battles profound insecurities and trauma. the scene between tommy and arthur in the church already communicates this, and obviously the episode with their father drives completely home that he's a tragically wounded character who struggles to find his place in the world and attempts to seek approval everywhere while constantly doubting his own capabilities. as the show goes on we are also shown an arthur who is intelligent, very observant (if he isn't too clouded by his volatile emotional affect) and competent, there's a great capacity for gentleness and kindness, on the flipside he's also a man able to commit some heinous acts that have - contrary to fanon - little to do with tommy's noxious influence over him, but arthur's own warped and compromised relationship with violence and power (of course, borne of trauma, but still something arthur himself is entirely culpable of).

here's where i also disagree with the often repeated chorus of 'tommy just sees arthur as his mad dog [used for convenience but otherwise ignored]'. it's polly who accuses tommy of this in s2, but it's in so far flawed as that polly's truisms are often, well, not exactly true, and she also has a tendency of being very protective of and starry-eyed about arthur while judging tommy more harshly than he possibly deserves (not always to be fair, but it does happen). now, while tommy does care for arthur's well-being, it's entirely true that it's not always his top priority. tommy has a business - both legal and illegal - to run, that arthur is completely voluntarily part of and that he profits from, while constantly getting roped into bullshit he has only limited control over. he can't play nanny for his older brother 24/7, and rather wants to rely on him, but not as a 'mad dog', but as a second in command that he can delegate important stuff to (arthur is explicitly in charge of the men when tommy isn't there, eden club, the changretta meeting, by s5 he runs the illegal side almost entirely autonomously, tommy sends arthur to retrieve aberama, etc etc). tommy relies on arthur's intelligence and (sometimes strategic) competence moreso than his fists. and it is only in s2 that arthur goes off the rails the way he does, it's not exactly a core aspect of his behaviour (the violence itself is, but the lack of self-control is up for debate, frankly). of course, tommy sometimes makes use of arthur's violence as he does of his own (tommy gets his hands dirty if needed, he's not a hypocrite nor someone who stands back while everyone else does the work), but it frustrates him just as much. this is also where i don't really think tommy 'ignores' arthur - it's plain that he loves him, when the stakes are relatively low and everything goes well they enjoy each other's company, there's a lot of mutual fondness there, they both know what they have in each other and so on and so forth. what's rather true is that tommy (equally damaged and traumatized) doesn't know how deal with arthur when he spirals or gets (self)destructive, and yet it's an unspoken rule that arthur is tommy's responsibility and his to fix, and this exhausts and frustrates and annoys him. this conflict in the earlier seasons is a little more ... volatile, i would say, while their relationship, after john's death especially, considerably softens (with its momentary exceptions, of course). there's a tension between what tommy sees in arthur (in a good way), how arthur acts (in good and bad ways) and what he *sometimes* believes tommy sees in him (possibly in a bad way, and to be fair, tommy can be a bit of a jerk, but then again so is arthur), and i'm not accounting for the complex interplay of their personalities and trauma, their different ways of coping (or not coping), the fact that they often miss each other in crucial moments while plainly caring for the other, etc etc. but as i've said before, if there's a question of tommy seeing arthur as his 'mad dog/expendable goon/older idiot brother' the answer is a resounding no as we watch these characters and their relationship develop. and setting all this aside, you can't really discount that arthur himself is a participant in this relationship and likewise impacts and shapes it in a lot of ways.

but getting back to this: the way alfie sees arthur is for reasons particular to his own character, it's not generally true, and it's not something tommy thinks as well, most of all. the way others see arthur has little to do with tommy's treatment of him

alfie thinks arthur is an idiot and that's the definite judgment on his character is the tritest trope in this fandom

[loveharlow]

LOVE SICK: THE AFTERMATH

PAIRING‧₊˚ JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

SYNOPSIS‧₊˚ [1.5k] Two love sick puppies reunited and all over one another but Y/N has a small surprise for JJ...

WARNING(S)‧₊˚ swearing, fluff (and I mean sickening), allusions to smut, Y/N IS NOT PREGNANT THAT IS NOT THE SURPRISE,

A/N‧₊˚ Take the Ex! out of Ex!Fem!Reader just warms my little old heart but this is the second part to the request and technically the third part to Love Sick. I guess this could also be read as a standalone.

˗ˏˋ jj masterlist ˎˊ˗

IT WAS LOVELY OUTSIDE TODAY. The sun was out but an occasional breeze swept by to keep my boyfriend and I cool as we sat on the rooftop just outside of my window. My knees were tucked up to my chest as I leaned my head on his broad shoulder, his feet outstretched in front of him as he fiddled on his phone.

We were simply enjoying each others company and maybe, just maybe, avoiding the topic that was floating around us — graduation. It was quite literally right around the corner, next week to be exact.

I could tell JJ had closed in on himself at the thought of it, more specifically what might happen after. What might happen to us. No matter how much I assured him that I was confident we’d make it, he always had his doubts.

I couldn’t blame him. JJ’s life had a certain track record of people leaving him. I knew he wasn't doubting our relationship, just merely stuck in his own head.

I had already been accepted into my college of choice, which so happened to be Pope’s top choice and we already know he got in. Kie had plans to take a gap-year and figure herself out and John B? Well, John B was too focused on Sarah to think about himself, waiting to see what decision she'd make.

They were my friends and I loved them, sure. But putting off your own future for someone else, even if they are you significant other never made much sense to me. As for JJ? He, himself, hadn’t applied for any school — too convinced he had already failed at life and would stay in the Outer Banks.

That would be fine had it been his dream, his honest choice. However, I could see the sadness swimming in his eyes anytime he joked about staying here. He was disappointed in himself. But he had no reason to be.

So, even though the evening was calm and peaceful, his thoughts were louder than he may have thought. 

“Hey, J?”

“Hm?”

“What do you think about moving with me? When I go off to school?” I immediately felt his shoulders tense underneath my head, him clicking off his phone and shoving it in his pocket.

“To Rhode Island? Y/n, that’s a long way from the Outer Banks…”

“That’s the best part, baby.” I proclaimed, lifting my head from his shoulders and turning to face him, pulling my sleeves into my palms — a nervous habit I’d had since I was a kid. He noticed this and pulled both of my palms into his own, a mindless gesture he’d picked up since dating me. “We can go beyond our own little island. I love the Outer Banks, you know I do. But you know we can’t stay here forever. Even if we move, it’ll always be here.”

He groaned and threw his head back,

“JJ…” I whined.

“What would I even do out there, sweetheart? Sit around in a studio apartment while you and Pope trapeze around campus? I’d be a burden.” He mumbled, looking down at the tile of the roof.

Removing one of my own hands from between his, I grabbed his jaw and lifted his gaze back up to mine gently, looking into his eyes. “Would you stop that? You’re not a burden and you never will be. Plus, you don’t really have a choice…”

His thick eyebrows furrowed in pure confusion, a slight ‘hm’ of puzzlement vibrating from his throat. A mischievous smile broke out on onto my face and his expression went from confusion to skepticism. Letting go of his defined and sexy, yet squishy and adorable, face — I climbed back through my bedroom window and bolted for my desk and opened the drawer beneath it, searching for the surprise I’d hidden weeks prior as he called out to me.

“What did you do?” His voice boomed curiously from outside. A girlish giggle escaped my lips as I found the envelope and folded list and snatched them, slamming the drawer shut and skipping back out through my bedroom window.

Sitting down in front of him, I was quickly pulled onto his lap — our faces inches apart with his hands tight on my waist. I couldn’t help but grin, the retrieved items hidden behind my back. “What is it? You’re kind of scaring me. Are you pregnant? ‘Cause I love you and what not but I don’t think-”

“I’m not pregnant, you dork.” I snorted, pulling the papers from behind my back and fanning them in between our faces, blocking our view of one another.

“Uh, random...papers?” He inquired in mock-excitement, raising a brow and quirking a side-smile.

Rolling my eyes, I dropped the folded piece of paper into our joined laps and flipped the envelope so he could see the college logo imprinted on the front of it. Wiggling my eyebrows, I lifted the damaged flap of the envelope that was already open and pulled out the letter that I had read over and over as if it was my own. Placing the letter in front of the envelope and unfolding it, I cleared my throat and put on a fake-sophisticated tone.

“Dear, JJ. Congratulations. It it with great pleasure that I offer you admission to-” Suddenly the paper was torn from beneath my fingers swiftly, a wide-eyed JJ staring back at me.

“Don’t fuck around like that.” Was all he muttered as his wide and frantic eyes wandered the letter mindlessly as if he couldn’t believe it was real. Then he was looking up at me. “I never applied there-” Then his blue eyes were zeroing in on me and the smile that hadn’t left my face, causing an ache in my cheeks. “Did you apply to college for me?” 

Then I was avoiding his eyes, swaying back and forth nervously and I shrugged my shoulders, biting my lip. “Maybe?”

Suddenly he was flashing a full-fledged smile and pulling me completely into him, muttering ‘I love you’ over and over into my neck as I giggled and tried to push away from him as he was tickling my neck with his mumbled praises. 

“JJ! J, please! I’m not-” My words got caught in my throat as his praises turned into kisses, my hands threading into his hair. “I have one more surprise.” I croaked out as the blonde pulled away from me, cheeks flushed and hair messed.

Winking at him, I pulled the folded paper from my lap and opened it — revealing a small list. I turned the paper in his direction, speaking as his eyes scanned over it. “I didn’t want to force you to go to college so one of my moms friends that works out there composed a list of jobs that are hiring that you may be interested in. Some Garages, Surf Shops, Clothing Stores, y’know.”

When his eyes never left the page and he remained silent, I grew fearful that I had gone overboard. My cheeks grew hot and my throat was starting to squeeze in on itself and the hand in his hair started to lower itself. “Or you can do neither. I mean, I’m not trying to dictate your life or anything-”

I was abruptly cut off when his lips quite literally crashed onto mine. The papers long forgotten as they went God knows where and his hands moved from my waist to cup my cheeks and my own hands resumed their position in his hair, tugging and caressing. The kiss was rough and passionate, his tongue swiping my bottom lip as I gladly parted mine for him. A groan reverberated through his chest and no matter how hard I fought, a small moan escaped my lips as one of his hands found the time to trail back down my waist and under my top — his hot palm creating a stark contrast that made goosebumps raise all over my body.

Then it hit me that we were on the fucking roof in The Cut where literally anyone could see us. Using all of my will power, I pulled away — JJ letting out a dissatisfactory whine as he chased after my lips, only to be met with my cheek instead.

“We’re outside, J.”

He continued to kiss my cheek and neck as he muttered through his kisses. “..’s never stopped us before.” A laugh erupted from my lips as I pushed his head away from me to be able to meet his eyes. I pecked his nose before I whispered in his ear.

“We don’t have to stop if we climb back inside.” 

Pulling back, I was greeted with his lovestruck grin and lust-filled gaze. Then he was gently pushing me through my own window and into my bedroom before he climbed in himself, his hands somehow, miraculously, never leaving me.

Then he was shutting the window by kicking the wall below it, since houses on the Cut weren’t of the best structure. He was pushing me into the mattress, working on getting my shorts off.

“I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with you.” He made out through kisses.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

General taglist; @livlaughquinn

JJ Maybank Taglist; @ronnieissupermegafoxyawesomehot

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading.

©loveharlow

[pizza-soup]

Just wanted to make a post saying I'm alright, I'm healthy, and most importantly I'm happy. I found that peace in analog living that I was looking for.

Long post ahead so brace yourself! I promise it's good.

So...

In a way my life outside of work went backwards in time. I did it all so drastically by canceling my internet for five months, and my phone? Well took a bit of searching to find a carrier with a non-smart phone device but I found one. Calls and text only. I left a message that my hours to call were between 1pm - 10pm. Unless there was an emergency. Devices like my laptop and tablet were not allowed in my room, everything was in the kitchen or living room, shut off entirely and used only when I got all my important things in the house done. My screentime was limited to just an hour and I set timers to keep to that. I was too used to spending so much time watching videos and pinning things but had nothing to show at the end of it all.

It was hard at first, but they say breaking a habit takes 21 days and it's easier if you replace the habit with a better one. So I asked a friend from work to hold me accountable and suggest a task to replace any mindless scrolling. She lived in ABQ but originally came from another country, she'd always had an interest in the local wildlife but being a city girl wasn't too comfortable going out herself. She knew I was much more daring, so she set me on a task to document what I'd find out there, take photos, write notes, and share them once a week. I found a sturdy enough journal in the garage and used that. I first I tried to draw everything but that was impractical, my brother gave me an old dedicated camera and then it all fell into place.

My friend loved reading through it, she'd add her own notes, she even added gummed stars to it like an old school book report. It's become a fun task but I'm running out of pages now, she said she wouldn't mind continuing it but it's apparent I haven't gone back to scrolling much anymore. Mission accomplished!

I got back into handicrafts. Sure I still draw digitally, but I started wanting to create things I could hold. Since I missed keeping a record of my life online, I started looking into analog journaling, at first it was just writing then I started playing around with found ephemera, finding quotes that inspired me, creating a ritual of lighting a candle and using scented pens to make these sessions soothing and inviting. When it rained, I'd open the window and write near it, and since these writings would only be for my eyes, I was allowed to write whatever came to mind, no filters or censoring, just my raw emotions and feelings. The torn pictures and odd bits glued in reflecting my mood for that day. While it's more convenient to pop open an app to write, it felt nice to see and touch something physical, to brush a finger on that pressed leaf I found by a stream or smell that bit of perfume I wore going out to eat with my loved ones.

My brother started getting inspired by me, and though he still uses his technology daily like gaming or the phone, he's taken to cooking from scratch. He has food intolerances (milk, nuts, and eggs), it limits his choices on anything from snacks to meals and some of the alternatives offered in stores taste horrible, but YouTube has been a huge resource on how to create food he can truly enjoy without accidently eating something that could make him sick. I'm his taste-tester now. At first his experiments were questionable, but now I enjoy his vegetable pancakes, mushroom and spinach hashbrowns, and venturing into Greek cuisine whenever my mom's dad goes on video chat. They'll cook together.

I became a bit more spiritual. I never understood why my dad would spend so long over a certain bit of text or quote that caught his eye, then write pages about how he interpreted it or how it made him feel, but now I do. Sometimes something just grabs you and you get so many thoughts about it. Nature makes me feel that. I'll see something and a profound thought hits me, suddenly I start writing pages expressing my thoughts, sometimes its just giving thanks for being able to be alive at that space and time to witness it. My grandmother says I'm finally learning to listen and being taught by beings much older than humanity. It's all fine to go out and explore, go seek out a thrill, but it's equally exciting coming back home having learned something that makes things fall into place or challenged your way of thinking. So now I use these experiences and meditate on them quietly, write what believe I was being taught, then open that page again when I need guidance. It's certainly helped when I felt overwhelmed and depressed.

I dropped to a very low point when I lost my orange tabby this year, he fell ill in July and I tried my best to figure out how to help him through vets. It never hit me just how old he really was. He acted like a kitten, looked so young... he was 17. His heart was just wearing down and he was in pain. They gave me time to say goodbye. I spoke and held him until the end. I buried him in the ground of the only home he knew. I remember writing something about this when I came across a dying crow in the woods. It was beautiful, their eyes looked so old, the feathers were faded and shabby. They didn't look scared when I stumbled upon them. Didn't react at all. Just stayed there, wings held tightly, barely breathing, making soft sounds as if it was talking to itself. I imitated it, and it responded with more soft sounds, coos, preened itself a bit. It wobbled toward me but stayed its distance. We went back and forth making those soft sounds. Eventually it's body went slack and it's eyes dulled. This little life was gone and it moved me to write coming back home.

I don't know how animals think of death or if they think of it all, maybe it's my human bias, but I know if my time eventually came, I'd like to have someone see me off, even a stranger. I'd like to hear a gentle voice as I passed on. That I wasn't alone. This experience in May helped my loss in July. This little kitten that I raised since he was 3 days old, found in a city dump with their siblings, I was there for all his firsts, for his graceful aging, and for his final days. And that's such an honor when you think about it. I was blessed with so much time with him, and it really does make you cherish the time spent with other loved ones. We never know how much time we have left with someone, yet we think we have forever.

To end this on a positive note, my health improved. I haven't had any relapses in my blood pressure, no fainting, even when doing some hiking I was okay. Maybe I finally built back my blood after that major injury, maybe it was the detox, who knows, maybe everything. But I think I can say I've made a full recovery. Work is the same as usual, still weird and entertaining as always. My brother's integrated into the night crowd wonderfully well and feeling like he's finally out of that stagnant place in his life. My mom is great, she's since moved into Carolines home and intends to stay long term. She enjoys the culture up here. Her father bought her old home and her younger brother is a permanent resident there, getting the help he needs for his schizophrenia, and pursuing his art again with a renewed passion.

Financially we're doing better than I could hope, I got a substantial increase, but we're still being frugal and helping out those who need it. As you read my inner health has improved and I feel like I finally have a handle on how I want to live. Essentially in a different era so to speak. I guess that's what I was searching for when I said I felt like Alice in that last post. I was looking for a way home through old abandoned buildings and forgotten places. And thought something must be wrong with me. Why did that feel like home? Because it was, it is.

When I rebelled against my mom, I took off not knowing where to go. I found refuge in these forgotten places and they became a home. Like these forgotten places I too felt betrayed by people I thought loved me, I felt discarded and alone. So I suppose I imprinted on them, regarded them as friends and shelter during the darkest days of my life. I was so scared, I felt like she'd find me, drag me home, punish me for daring to go againest her if I hid in the usual places. But she would never find me in these places. They were much too ruined, chaotic, and distorted.

When I finally found a true place to call home with Caroline, I started missing these places, as they were my islands in a storm, they took me in when I had nothing. I became protective of these places that people feared. I wanted to show everyone the beauty I saw in these empty and liminal places. But capturing that feeling without them knowing the context and emotions I felt during that time was tricky or next to impossible. So I started researching their history, piecing together what these places were, never once trying to present them as scary but that they simply existed and were misunderstood.

And this worked. It also worked for my relationship with my mom, especially when someone outside the family tried to tear down her old childhood home, something she had a hand in making long ago. I was there to defend it, to put a stop to a man who called it worthless. And my words spoke out againest this to the city, asking them to see what I see, and what it could be. That you didn't need to destroy something to make room for something new, as not everything new is good. You can change things that already exist and make them better. You just have to make the first move and sometimes that's all it takes to have others follow.

It was here I realized its was in my nature to guard. Not just as a job, but as a guard in its truest definition. Just as I advocate for those who work below and forgotten by the employees above. With Brun and his crew. With the janitorial. With the abandoned animals, with the homeless, with the local native tribe. My heart is full for those lost and voiceless, because I know how that feels intimately.

And now my mom's old home still stands, being renovated and preserved as a historical spot. I believe that was the pivotal point our relationship mended. She understood now. We came to accept we needed each other for balance. Sometimes she needed to let go of that stubborn order to have a little fun and to keep sentimental things from being forgotten. Sometimes I needed a bit more structure in my life.

Okay so a lot of structure.

It's a work in progress, especially with setting times and limits on myself, my god its hard! But its worth it. I don't think I'll be fully like her, lord knows we're too different for that, my brother is more like her but with time management. Together they help me be accountable, and I help them cut loose a bit when they get too wound up.

But getting back to the main topic...

I am sorry for just disappearing and leaving people hanging. I guess I thought my last message explained it all, but a few were left confused and scared. I'm really am sorry for that. I'm okay! I hope you're okay and if not, I hope you will be okay soon.

However if you think this message is me returning, Im sorry. Its not. I really don't want to return to social media to be honest. I don't know if I'd fall into the same bad habits again, and it was an uphill battle trying to undo the damage it caused me. I've fallen out of love with things I used to do online as well, they just don't appeal to me anymore for various reasons, and that may impact a few of the friends I left behind. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me, you're valid in your anger and sadness, I acknowledge and accept that. If you never want to speak to me, it's okay, I understand. You do what you need to.

To those who wish to stay in contact, I can't exactly guarantee we can. It might be intermittent, weeks or months might pass. I guess in a way my lifestyle now has a bit of a time-dilation thing. Things will take longer to get to. Transmissions might get lost. Please understand why though.

Best wishes to you all! Know that in my disappearence you were in my thoughts and prayers. I love you all.

[miyanom]

DEVILS PARADISE (part one)

MASTERLIST | JEAN KIRSTEIN X FEM!READER

synopsis: growing up in marley, y/n learnt the devils of paradis are her greatest enemy. though they shared the blood running through her veins, their mere existence led to constant discrimination against y/n’s people. knowing all of this, y/n enlists in the marleyan warrior program; a program designed to turn eldians like herself into titan shifters. however, joining the program leads y/n to the devil’s paradise, and she realises the truth marley so desperately hid from them.

warnings: spoilers for season 4, blood and violence. reader has hair long enough to be tied up, but only in a flashback.

notes: i’m leaning toward this being a 5 part series at most with jean as the love interest, but i’m not too sure, it might be shorter or longer than that!

word count: 2506

"When you become a Marleyan Warrior, you'll make all of us proud here in Liberio, Y/N." Her mother spoke, pulling the child's hair back as she tied it with a crimson red ribbon. "You'll show them that we aren't like those island devils."

Her mother spoke with disgust as she mentioned the Eldian devils of Paradis. By now, Y/N knew to keep silent and agree with her mother about everything.

"You'll become one of the Warriors for me, won't you, Y/N?" She glanced down at her daughter, a stern expression on her face.

Y/N nodded her head, smiling up at her mother. "Of course."

It was a decision completely out of Y/N's hands, she could only train as hard as she could and hope for the best. But in her mother's eyes, the best just wasn't good enough. It was never good enough.

Looking back, Y/N could hear the words "this is the only way" repeating in her head over and over again until she began to agree with it too.

The only way for the Marleyans to see her family as just a little bit more human, was if Y/N were to become one of the warriors.

Earning that red band and becoming honorary Marleyans was the only way to be happy.

Y/N leaned against the wall of the courtyard her and the others in her Warrior training unit were waiting in. The tip of her shoe digging into the ground in front of her as she stayed buried within her thoughts.

With the previous warriors terms coming to an end, she had heard from the army that she was a prime candidate for one of the Titans, it was almost guaranteed at this point considering the Warrior unit had been narrowed down to the 8 of them.

But soon, one of them would be left behind, while the others are turned to Titan shifters.

“Did you guys hear? We’re attacking Paradis Island in just a few years,” Zeke spoke from where he was sitting, before chucking an apple in Marcel’s direction.

“Huh?” Y/N breathed out, raising her head to look over at the older man.

“It’s almost time for us to inherit Titans,” Zeke continued. “Out of the eight of us, they’re picking seven!”

Y/N looked back at the ground for a moment, the 10 year old’s shoulders becoming stiff. Yes, she was almost guaranteed to receive a Titan, but if something happened and she failed to earn the title of honorary marleyan’s for her family…

“Yes! I can finally be Marleyan!” Reiner spoke excitedly.

“Huh? Why so excited?” Porco glanced over at him. “If anyone’s the worst, it’s you.”

Reiner’s head snapped in the boy’s direction, his hands clenched into fists. “Excuse me?!”

“What’s your strong point?” Porco continued. “Your strength? Your brains? Your aim? Combat ability? Nope. The only value they see in you is your loyalty to Marley.”

Y/N kept her gaze off the two boys, knowing Porco was right. The only thing that made Reiner appealing to Marley was his unrelenting loyalty.

One day, that wouldn’t be enough.

“I’ll slaughter the island devils real good for you, sir!” Porco mocked.

Reiner stepped forward, grabbing Porco’s wrist, causing the boy to drop the apple he was holding. “You making fun of our mission?! Or maybe you’re a stray Restorationist?! You are, aren’t you?! I’ll report you to the Commander!”

“Report this, you little shit!”

When Y/N finally lifted her head, Reiner was already on the ground. And Marcel was holding his brother back from attacking the boy again.

“Hating the island doesn’t make you special!” Porco told him. “Have fun waiting 13 years alone!”

Knocking his brother away, Porco began to storm off, causing Zeke to finally stand up. “Let’s go, Pieck, Y/N.” He spared a quick glance at the girls standing near him.

Pieck, older by just a few small years, was much like a sister to Y/N. Looking out for her during their time in the program despite the fact they were possibly competing for a place.

The raven haired girl took Y/N’s hand, gently pulling her along to follow after Zeke. It was a habit Pieck had taken up after noticing Y/N’s tendency to space out when things got too quiet.

“Don’t cry too long or the Commander will chew me out,” Zeke called back to Reiner, who remained in the dirt.

Y/N glanced over her shoulder as Pieck continued to pull her along, her eyes falling onto Reiner as Bertholdt helped him onto his feet.

Becoming a Warrior was a privilege, Y/N knew that. But why would anyone want to shorten their life to a 13 year term dedicated to fighting Marley’s enemies?

Y/N didn’t want to die in 13 years, she’d rather take the hatred from Marley for the rest of her life, like many others had done before her.

If she had a choice, that was exactly what she would do. But it was too late now.

In a few years, she would be an official Marleyan Warrior, headed for the devil’s island to attack their self imposed century long quarantine.

Y/N’s eyes flickered up to the sky, as a bird flew overhead leaving her to wonder what the island devils were doing in this moment.

Did they really deserve what was coming?

The weeks leading up to Y/N being sent to Paradis all passed by in a blur, whether it was the shock of finally being an honorary Marleyan or the memories of the former host that kept her awake at night, Y/N wasn’t sure.

All she knew was that she was on Paradis Island, headed with Reiner, Annie, Bertholdt and Marcel to break through the wall that kept the devils safe from the Titans Marley had filled the island with over the past century.

Did they really deserve what was coming? Did they deserve it? Did they-

“Y/N, can you?” Bertholdt held the can in Y/N’s direction as he whispered.

Y/N carefully took the unopened can of food from his shaky hands, peeling it open before handing it back. She had been doing it for him the past few nights, his hands too shaky to even open a simple can as it came closer and closer to the day he would kick through the wall.

It couldn’t be easy being the successor for the Colossal Titan, a god of death.

“You alright?” Y/N questioned quietly, taking note of the fear in his eyes.

Bertholdt quickly averted his gaze, letting out a hum as he nodded his head.

He was always quiet like this, and Y/N found it oddly calming. It was a nice difference when compared to the louder members of their unit back in Marley.

It was nice because it reminded her of Pieck, who had stayed behind with Zeke to protect Marley while the others attacked Paradis.

“We didn’t cover much ground tonight,” Marcel commented as he poked at the fire with a stick.

“Can’t do much about the clouds.”

“Will the King really not use the Founding Titan, even if we break the wall?” Bertholdt asked, remembering what they had been told in preparation for their mission.

“What’s the use asking now?” Reiner glanced at him. “Trust Marley’s research.”

Y/N stares at the fire in front of her, one hand coming up to rest against her forearm, right where the material band showing her status would be sitting if she were back in Marley.

It felt weird to not have that constant reminder that she was nothing but Titan shifting scum.

“That’s right. We can’t turn back,” Marcel nodded. “Tomorrow, we reach the wall… and then…”

Y/N remained silent, a shaky breath falling from her lips. Right, tomorrow they would be breaking through the Wall. They’d come face to face with the people they were sent to kill.

It’s not like they haven’t done it before, they were sent to destroy an enemy base as part of their Titan training.

But those people had been actively trying to harm Marley… the devils hadn’t done that in over a century.

Reiner’s eyes scanned the group, a shocked expression painted over his face. “Huh? What? Are you having second thoughts about killing the devils? Have you forgotten what they’ve done?!”

Y/N hugged her legs close to her chest, refusing to look in Reiner’s direction or answer his question.

It was impossible to forget the sins of the Eldians, it had been drilled into their heads for years now, after all.

Reiner stood up quickly. “We’re the world’s chosen Warriors sent to punish the island devils!”

Marcel averted his gaze. “I’m sorry.”

“Huh?”

“Reiner, I’m sorry. You were never meant to be chosen as a Warrior,” Marcel continued.

Y/N’s head shot in the boy’s direction, her eyes widened. She couldn’t say it was a surprise, no, Reiner was the weakest of the warriors in their unit.

Maybe it was a shock?

Marcel’s voice came out like it hurt him to finally admit it. “I talked you up and criticised my brother to influence their decision. I… just want to protect my brother.”

Tears began to fall from his eyes. “I’m sorry, Reiner… I’m sorry!”

Y/N turned to see Reiner’s frozen form, unmoving and engulfed by shock— it was the same thing he did when he watched Marcel get eaten by a Titan.

Frozen, unmoving, and engulfed by shock.

Y/N could still hear Marcel’s screaming, as the other warriors ran for their lives.

Her chest felt heavy as they finally came to a stop, her knees giving out beneath her as she fell to the grass. Teardrops falling against her clenched fists.

How long had she been crying for?

She couldn’t tell, not when she was too focused on escaping the mindless titan that devoured Marcel before their very eyes.

She choked back the sob that threatened to fall from her lips as she realised what they had done; they could’ve saved Marcel, they should’ve saved Marcel, but they ran.

And they lost the Jaw Titan.

Marley was going to kill them, they weren’t even going to reach the end of their 13 year term. They were going to die for failing the mission before even reaching the walls.

Would it even be worth it if they came back with the Founding Titan but not the Jaw Titan? They’d still be left with the same number as before.

Y/N’s eyes widened when she felt a hand press against her back, though she relaxed just slightly as she realised it was Bertholdt.

He looked just as terrified as her.

As Annie caught up to the group, she immediately kicked Reiner, causing the boy to start screaming as he moved away in fear.

“Not bad,” Annie spoke, her voice coming out almost breathlessly from the running. “This is a first. You actually beat me… in a long distance race…”

Y/N wiped her tears away as she pushed herself up, looking back in the direction they had come from.

“If we took out that Titan we wouldn’t have lost Jaw,” Annie told Reiner. “Shit! Now Marcel’s gone for good.”

“They said there wouldn’t be Titans this far out,” Reiner whispered.

“We’ve gotta go home,” Annie averted her gaze. “Let’s find Jaw and leave. They would’ve changed back to human. Besides, without Marcel to lead, this mission is doomed.”

“Do you… do you think they’ll just come willingly?” Y/N breathed out, still trying to catch her breath.

Though just as Y/N moved to follow Annie, Reiner began to yell. “We can’t!”

Y/N turned around, her eyes widening as Reiner held his outstretched hand in their direction. “We can’t go home! We’ve gotta continue the mission!”

“Oh, yeah…” Annie’s eyes narrowed in his direction for a moment. “If we go back now, you’ll just get eaten by the next Warrior.”

Reiner began nodding his head.

Y/N looked away from the boy, biting her trembling lip gently. Porco was the next warrior… he would see Reiner’s memories, see his brother getting eaten…

“You think only I will?” Reiner spoke up, causing the other three to turn back to him. “That only I’ll get the blame for running away? You guys are certain you won’t get eaten, too?”

Y/N swallowed the lump forming in the back of her dried throat, an uneasy feeling returning to the pit of her stomach as she stared at Reiner’s grim face.

“Catching Jaw won’t be easy either. If they used its power and ran, our titans could never catch up.”

“They can’t control it right after becoming-”

“You controlled the Colossal Titan, no problem!” Reiner cut Bertholdt off. “Anyways, we’re doomed at this rate! Without the Founding Titan, there’s no going home!”

He was right, Y/N realised. None of them could catch up with the Jaw Titan, and if they returned empty handed, they would all die.

“Back there, if you were a fraction as calm as you are now, we wouldn’t have lost Marcel or Jaw,” Annie stated. “But you’ve got no problem intimidating us to save your own ass, huh?!”

Walking back toward Reiner, she let out a shout as she kicked the boy in the face, sending him flying backward onto the ground.

“How about you come clean to Magath?! Tell him, “it’s all my fault!” Honorary Marleyan, my ass!” She shouted, continually kicking him over and over again. “Chosen warrior, my ass! Marleyans, Eldians! They’re all liars! Everyone only thinks about themselves!”

Y/N remained silent, knowing Annie was right. The predicament they were in now could’ve been avoided had Reiner remained calm back then.

Marcel died saving him, after all.

If Reiner had just sucked it up, if he just didn’t let what Marcel said get to him, they would’ve been long gone before the Titan even woke up from its slumber.

“Should we… should we stop her?” Bertholdt glanced at Y/N.

Y/N stared at Annie who kept kicking Reiner in her anger, before she looked to Bertholdt and shook her head. “Annie’s right.”

“If you feel guilty, just die! Take all the blame and die!”

With that, Annie began to walk away, leaving Reiner face first on the ground, blood pooling on the grass beneath his face.

A perk of being a Titan shifter was that they could all heal from wounds like that.

Y/N’s eyes widened as Reiner pushed himself up, jumping at Annie and holding her in a headlock. “Reiner is dead,” he spoke. “If we need Marcel, then I’ll be Marcel.”

Y/N’s throat went dry once more as she stared at Reiner in fear, her hands shaking at her sides.

“Please, stop this…” Bertholdt muttered, tears falling from his eyes as he watched.

“This is the only way we’ll be able to go back home!” Reiner kept his grip on Annie. “Let’s go back… together… to our hometown!”

[b3ast0fburd3n]

Beth grins, Eden's nostrils flare.

She will not kill another pirate. They're on the same side, they might as well try to get along. But it's fucking Beth. Beth who doesn't like anyone. Beth who forces her way into fights without regard for anyones safety. Beth who gets pleasure from inflicting pain. Apparently, that applies to emotional pain too, Beth seems to be getting off on Eden's discomfort. She seems satisfied with herself. PROUD. Eden could show her. Eden could help her realize her sin. Carve it into her throat and cut it out.

She doesn't get the luxury of spacing out on the ride back. Beth is staring again. It's focused and intense. Unblinking. The jeep passes a tree growing dangerously close to the path, Eden considers ramming Beth's half of the vehicle into it. She can usually get past this. People go out of their way to piss her off, she responds politely (well, polite for Rook) and they back off eventually. But fucking Beth. Every nerve in her body is trained on the one staring, pulling Eden's attention away from the dirt path. She hasn't been this angry since she was a kid, too small to fight for herself but having no choice in the matter. It sets her on a knifes edge, makes her unpredictable. She tries to breathe through everything pounding through her head. She just has to get back to camp. Her foot presses harder on the gas pedal. Faster is better.

Again, she's nearly able to shake it off and move on when Beth pushes. She sure does that a lot. The mindless thought is something to hang on to while Beth criticizes her. Tells her the only thing she's ever been good at is 'not for her'. Her hands grip the wheel, rough palms squeaking on the worn material. Yes, she does her job differently than others. She asks more questions, puts more effort into the tasks given to her. She doesn't complain.

She's too lost in her own thoughts to respond, slamming back into reality when Beth invades her personal space. Eden slams against the driver side door, jerking the vehicle into the path of another. She forces it back onto its designated side of the path. Eden slows the car down, takes a breath. Is this worth dying over? This anger and rage?

Beth is just a person. She was a child once. She has habits to be exploited to be recognized. His guidance tells her to afford Beth grace. Analyze her before you write her off. Work in the shadows. Get in close before you strike. This is a test of will.

The cold coming off Beth is bone chilling. Eden's interest in mauling her had already gone down, but the shift pushed it farther. Beth wouldn't let her win. The only outcome would be Beth or no one. Her eyes stay trained forward, avoiding the urge to look at the threat. Instincts say fawn. Give in. Let her have the power, she belongs above you.

"You're right." She forces it out gruffly, taking a hit to her ego to imply she was wrong. "I wasn't thinking." Her head shakes absentmindedly. It's a lie. It has to be. "You saved us." She finally gathers the courage to face Beth, forcing her eyes to find the others. "We would've died if you hadn't stepped in." She holds the stare, her own little act of defiance while submitting. Jacob would chastise her for having such little resolve. He praises her for minding the hierarchy.

The knowledge that Beth was getting to Eden, had ALREADY gotten to her, was far more rewarding than what was actually being said. It was the feeling wedged deep in her bones, pinning her heart — being superior. Being better. Especially over another woman.

She briefly wondered if her mother would say anything about this, if she'd care. If she'd go on one of those tangents about how horrid of a child Beth was, how she should've stopped at her sister. The ones that ended in being hit. The thought was quickly shaken from her head by a final drag of her cigarette, the butt flicked out of the open window.

The forced through teeth ' thank you ' had Beth's teeth flashing, a grin that accompanied her shoulders wiggling as she readjusted in her seat to get more comfortable. She watched out of the window at the passing jungle for a few moments, but then her gaze fell upon Eden. Watching her so UNCOMFORTABLY intently, that you'd wonder if she'd even blinked at all during their conversation.

"That's a fucking load of shit, mate." Beth stated, amusement dripping, intertwined with something resembling a mixture of goading and dare. Continue. See what the fuck happens. "You've been here long enough, no? If you don't know what pirates are like, maybe this isn't the job for you."

Finally, Beth seemed to blink. She placed her elbow on her armrest, used her hand to prop her head up by the chin, leaning in ( into Eden's personal space ) . Still staring at Eden as she drove. Still exuding that same THREATENING, JUDGING aura she had used when Eden ducked her head under her searching gaze. An intensity that was supported by earlier's events, let alone the legacy of her past.

"It's called having fun! You can't tell me you don't have fun?" She straightened then, finally tearing her gaze away, but not giving Eden back her personal space. No, instead she peered at the path ahead, at the luscious trees and beautiful sky. Abruptly, the tone in the jeep shifted. Suddenly, Beth's body was rigid, her brows lowering, gaze growing cold.

"I saved us. I saved you." Her eyes drew back to the other, her tone unnervingly even and calm. "Do you think of those Rakyat FUCKS as merciful? Huh? Do you think if I did fuck all we would be alive? ENLIGHTEN me. Please."

The way her voice lowered, the way she seemed so calm, had the pirates in the backseat tensing. They shared a glance, swallowed hard. One shifted where he sat — they were nervous, anticipating the worst. Clearly, this was Beth's infamous temper coming out, and it was more than enough to render the pirates scared.

[laryna6]

Nobles reproduce asexually and non-pureblood nobles originated from true contracts.

In a true contract the noble and human's souls join together and kind of merge around the edges. When the human dies, the noble's ~immune system goes 'hang on there's a part of me that's blurred with another mind and this could be dangerous for keeping myself 'myself.'' - The biggest danger to immortals is going insane/mindless if they don't decide how they're going to be and then act like that person consistently - see the human concept of 'integrity.'

(That is where the noble concept of 'inelegance' comes from - the Latin root is 'eligere' or 'choice,' and calling someone inelegant is saying 'you're making bad choices and if you keep acting this way you're going to lose your selfhood.' People who don't value the selfhood and rights of others will get a habit of acting as though people don't matter, and this habit means they will apply that to themselves too, and eventually degrade into bugfuck nuts or just mindless things over the millennia.)

So post true contract the part-human soul piece gets budded off and manifests as a new noble. Those nobles are capable of having children which are also non-purebloods. There are some nobles who came from true contracts with species other than hominids, too. There aren't any part-werewolf nobles because werewolf mental defenses don't permit a foreign influence over their souls (at least not long term w/o fighting it off) and a true contract requires cooperation from both parties to form.

Living around nobles caused humans to select for the ability to control psychic energy - not just true contracts, but nobles ~leak aura and humans who could absorb that aura could use it for healing and communication even without having a contract themselves. That's why there are humans with powers in Rai's Adventure and why Shinwoo is so tough: they've been living in range of a noble.

Nobles are required by law to have red eyes so humans can identify them: the criminal noble in Rai's Adventure has blue eyes and Raskreia assumes that Frankenstein is a noble breaking the law because he has noble style eyes (nested pupils) that aren't red.

Non-pureblood nobles aren't as powerful as purebloods because their souls/energy forms are smaller and the human ability to control energy isn't as good as the noble ability - yet. If either Rai or Frankenstein were to die, the resulting noble would absolutely be as tough as a pureblood. Rai hasn't told Frankenstein that 'oh hey if I die there's going to be a baby' because he assumed the Previous Lord explained the birds and the bees of true contracts. Unfortunately, nobles not realizing 'oh hey I should use language to tell people important things' strikes again.

Before they picked up language from humans, nobles communicated by mind control - inserting concepts into the other noble's mind. And mind control isn't something to do lightly. A noble calling someone 'talkative' was originally not quite an insult, it was more like 'stop trying to control me or I will start stabbing you.' Because of the need for integrity to remain themselves over the millennia of immortality, a noble changing how they act/what they think is Serious Business. This is why Gejutel is stubborn AF and why he raised Regis to be the same way.

After all, the hierarchy of survival needs is very different for a species that doesn't need to eat or breathe and doesn't need to worry about dying from exposure when they can just manifest clothing, etc. The Landegre and Loyard clans dying wasn't impractical chivalry, it was 'if we stop acting as though people's lives have meaning then we will cease to be ourselves and that's worse than just going to sleep.'

My worldbuilding for how nobles and werewolves happened in Noblesse goes like so:

Nobles are energy/dimensional beings and the first one to achieve sapience, the original Lord, got very bored and wanted intelligent company. So he started looking for other intelligent life: he found other beings like him, but they weren't actually smart because they didn't need to be, they just floated around and existed.

Then he managed to filter signals out of the universal background noise, and found an intelligent species roughly similar to humanity - carbon based, evolved on an earthlikeish world, etc.

Unfortunately, they had developed the ability to modify themselves, and of course the rich and powerful were the ones to benefit and use it to become even more powerful/oppressive, while treating the people who couldn't afford to extend their lifespans like their lives were worthless.

Basically, they were making the same mistake the Union made: not valuing selfhood means losing selfhood when you're an immortal. Kindness, actual intelligence - the species was losing those traits by assholes killing all the non-assholes.

So the Original Lord was like 'shit I found people but I can't use them as a template for uplifting my kind because they're devolving into mindless things that just kill, which is even worse than being mindless things that just exist.'

So he created the original Noblesse to make sure that never happened to him (if he started looking down on his intellectual inferiors too much) or his kind.

Eventually he got sick of being alone, created a child, and then went into eternal sleep (went back to just mindlessly existing) as technically the second soul weapon (the Noblesse being the first).

That Lord was the one who went 'okay, this other species became intelligent from being in bodies on a planet' and pushed the rest of the nobles to manifest bodies on Earth and also put some of the descendants of that species there too in case that helped - which it sort of did, because the species that would eventually become werewolves attacked everything including the nobles, so they had to do/get good at *something* (fighting/self-defense) instead of sitting around like lumps.

After Earth developed its own life, that Lord saw that evolution was a thing and made it a rule that if you couldn't keep your body from being destroyed you had to go to eternal sleep. However even in the present day the youngest nobles are only sixth generation so they haven't had enough time for any real evolution to take place.

Nobles interacted/contracted with more species than just early hominids and gradually started to pick up how to think/solve problems from the minds around them, which accelerated when proto-humans came around and they started cohabitating. The Lord then ordered that nobles had to take human form because human brains were good at thinking.

Unfortunately, the werewolves were modified into chimeras that got the abilities of other species by eating them, and humans obviously objected to being eaten. But if werewolves didn't keep eating humans for their neurons their intelligence dropped back down. Nobles lent humans power so they could defend themselves and there was basically a werewolves vs. nobles/humans war until the Previous Lord figured out enough of werewolf biology that he could make them grow their own neurons and pass quasi-human bodies with brains down to their descendants. This is the result of a ~spell anchored in one of the noble sanctuaries and one of the reasons Muzaka was 'if we fight with the nobles and humans we don't win' when other werewolves were 'why DON'T we subjugate the inferior humans?' because forget fighting, the noble Lord could have turned off the array and lobotomized their entire species. (The Previous Lord did NOT pass any of this information down to Raskreia. None of the awake nobles know how their species originated except Rai, because the Noblesses have some programmed knowledge so they know what their job is.)

The rest of the werewolves didn't know about the array because like the nobles, they lacked any oral history tradition and the older werewolves didn't want to talk about how they once had no choice but to eat actual people because they were ashamed of it. Muzaka was told about it by the werewolf he defeated to become Lord.

So even though there are two other species on earth that are in theory very different from humans, they both think a surprising amount like humans because they're mostly using human brains to do it with, so there's no Lovecraftian 'these beings are so different from us we're just ants to them' and this is enforced because the Noblesse exists and their job is to go 'oh, so you think the powerful have the right to crush the weak? Alright, have it your way' before people who think that way can kill, or worse, influence others.

The concept of superior(gets to abuse)inferior is a predatory meme that already wiped out one sentient species - the modern werewolves are descended from that species, sure, but they're so different from them it would make more sense to call them humans than remnants of that species.

The nobles were confined on Lukedonia because they kept getting attached to humans and then as a species of immortals, not having any healthy way to deal with LOSING generation after generation of humans was really fucking them up. So the nobles still awake were quarantined on Lukedonia until humans became less fragile/achieved immortality and would stop dying on the nobles. The Previous Lord took most of his generation of clan leaders into eternal sleep so that their kids would have tons of problems and would have to get better at thinking to solve them. That's why he didn't want Raskreia to be Lord, because he felt guilty about how his entire plan for noble development was making the lives of the next generation of nobles as hard as possible, with them barely having any idea what they are or how their powers worked and then starting to interact with humans again when humans are predators and humans thinking nobles are shiny isn't necessarily going to end well for a noble once the average human is capable of fighting a noble without a contract.

So the project to uplift nobles is doing pretty well, but they still need to actually start talking to each other and passing on information. Given how good some oral traditions are, certain humans probably remember more about what things were like when nobles like Gejutel and Lagus were young than those nobles do.

The Union/Maduke's fascist 'family' need to be taken out before they do to this planet what happened to the original werewolf species.

Rai's brother tried to wipe out humanity because in their generation there were two noblesse and so their job got split in half, with Rai being tasked with internal threats and his brother with external. Rai's brother decided that humans were causing so many nobles to enter eternal sleep and humans were also possessive of nobles, so once humans evolved to be equal to nobles they'd probably try to subjugate them, so they had to be wiped out. Rai was 'the strong killing the weak is a much bigger danger to nobles than humans are' and ofc genocide is wrong, so Rai had to take him out. Some nobles who lost too many family to humans (those family members choosing to enter eternal sleep instead of staying awake with the noble family who loved them) were making bloodstones to support Rai's brother because of all the nobles who were attacking him to protect humans.

Rai's brother didn't want Rai to die, so the idea was to knock him out until he was done eliminating the humans and then make him eat a bloodstone to repair the damage. Most of the humans Rai's brother killed and the nobles who also died in the conflict were resurrected by the Previous Lord: there's an array that gathers human souls so they don't cease to exist on death that he created. It's powered by the array that drains the Lord's power in the throne room so they don't rip open the Earth's crust every time they lose their temper (see the two large blue crystals). He didn't tell Raskreia that the castle array does anything but protect Lukedonia from her power either.

Gejutel knows about the artificial afterlife but it wouldn't occur to him to tell anyone because talking is a fairly recent concept for him and doing it unnecessarily is being noisy. Raizel knows about it too but assumes Franken knows about it because Franken knows a lot of things. It's possible to resurrect them just like it's possible to wake up sleeping nobles. Unfortunately it doesn't work on werewolves because werewolves have defenses against getting engulfed by foreign energy fields and dragged out of their bodies, so werewolves actually die when they are killed.