#it was very good but i didnt enjoy some of the like epilogue choices . but i already knew some of that stuff was coming so it wasnt like .

[aliensmoothie]

i finally finished amnesty today ! yay !

[not-a-big-slay]

Until it doesn't hurt

kaz brekker x fem!reader

warnings: talks of murder, slavery,

a/n: long ahh chapter, but thats what you get as an apology for waiting. i didnt forget about this series and id be damned if i ever would. there are only two chapters left- part 12 and the epilogue, so please stick around and i will try to get them out sooner than this chapter. it was almost half a fuckin year??!!! oh i need a wake up call goddamn. anyway, thank you for reading it and the positive comments here and on wattpad! enjoy this chapter :)

part 11/13:

previous part: part 10

next part: part 12

masterlist

taglist (sorry to bother everyone, i know it has been 5 months..):

@chickencouncilrep

@venomsvl

@happy-nico

comment to be added, two chapters left

"Sounds risky."

"It is."

"And suicidal."

"Yes."

"Also impossible."

"Very much so."

Jesper was amused by the conversation between Inej and Y/N. He has learned his poker partner had only a day left to finish her job. Killing Pekka Rollins couldn't be easy, so when she knocked on the door of Inej's old room, he could see just how anxious Y/N was and how desperate her voice rang when she proposed teaming up with his old friend. Their shared feeling of duty may help them cooperate and increase chances of ending the monster's life. However Inej's former enlightment that came from the hitman's good idea now seemed lost as Y/N shared her deadly plan.

Jesper was just happy to be in the same room, he didn't feel included, nor should he. It wasn't like he would join them, but even men living from the adrenaline of risks would doubt this scheme. It included too many holes that would serve trouble to sneek in "I don't know, Y/N." voiced her uncertanty Inej, "I understand you have limited time, but I'd rather be late than dead." Jesper agreed silently by nodding as they watched the girl think with furrowed eyebrows, not realizing she already is one of those choices. Jesper cleared his throat, he really didn't want to speak, but he couldn't allow Y/N to drag his friend to provoke death herself. "It's not exactly... bulletproof, is it?"

The plan goes as this: Y/N would send a message to Rollins, preferably not a dreg messenger, to meet him somewhere yet not disclosed where. First hole: the Dime Lions' leader will not listen to a mysterious note and probably will not come. Y/N reassured them he will, but didn't gave them a reason to believe that. After the target arrives at the place that's, again, still non-existent, he comes to face Y/N and some 'old friend', as the girl said. Second hole: Y/N won't tell them many key details to the plan, they are just supposed to

"Trust me, it will work."

Inej sighed loudly, clearly trying to find trust in this girl within her. "Are you sure he'll come alone?" she pointed out a part of the plan where they will meet Rollins alone. Third hole, for obvious reasons. "He won't have a reason not to. Our only leverage is that he doesn't suspect I know you, he still thinks I'm on my own." the hitman cleared up and ran a hand through her hair. At least she briefly explained to them that she had met Rollins before, that her job was sort of a revenge, but didn't tell them for what, nor they expected her to. Jesper wanted to keep his mouth shut, but it seemed he was the only one that saw another problem with her statement. "Remind me then, Y/N." the person mentioned turned her gaze away from the table covered under the map of Ketterdam and pleaded him to continue, "What did Rollins do exactly when he found out you were on your own? Kidnapped you is what." he didn't give her time to answer, because it wasn't a question. Finding her bloodied and strapped to a chair with Kaz pointing a gun at her was an unpleasant sight, more unpleasant was Y/N's story about how she got there. The image of the night appeared as if on cue in his mind and made him add: "And who was robbing him on the night you escaped?" Y/N's hands pushed themselves off the table before her legs started to slowly pace the room, hopefully thinking about Jesper's words.

"That's true. His guards saw us all escaping, there is no way you are considered to be alone." Inej supported his doubts and made the girl stop in tracks, her back facing them. Candles lit the room brightly and they flickered when Jesper thought about his utter confusion after finding out Kaz and Y/N knew each other since childhood. He assumed Kaz was born a teenager with insanity inside his genes, the thought of him being a demon that crawled out from hell also crossed his mind. No one knew exactly about his past, no one except maybe for Y/N, but since they seem to hate each other now, it's probably for their own good to not posses the knowledge of Kaz as a child. It was silence for a while until Y/N's words cut through it. "Well, he might be stupid enough to come alone," she let out a sigh and Jesper swore he saw goosebumps on her neck as she finished the sentence, "but not naïve enough to think Kaz would help me."

After Rollins arrives, Inej- present in the skies- will make sure he is indeed alone, or she gets rid of any other presence. Y/N aspires for the place of meeting to be dark, so Inej is not seen while working. After doing so, the spider will stand in the dark behind Pekka, waiting for her cue to put a knife on his throat. Jesper assumes there will be some dialogue between Y/N and Rollins before the two kill him, he fancies it as some sort of drama play they often held on Eil Komedie in a theater. He'd definitely took Wylan to see this play with him, but would rather avoid the same scenario in real life. And how they kill him: the hitman will shoot him, somewhere fatal but where he won't die instantly. Then, she will hit him until only a toe is left touching the alive side of border between life and death. Inej will then 'keep her promise'. or simply put, carve his heart out. Brutal, but poetic in Jesper's opinion. He will die a painful death, Y/N gets her money and revenge and Inej finishes a long undone job, everybody wins.

The girl turned to them, she saw the hesitation in their eyes and walked closer. "I know it's dangerous, but if we won't do it, someone else will." Jesper sinked into confusion and let it show on his face freely, Y/N for his sake quickly explained. "Someone, who holds grudges, will come for him. And they might do it in a more stupid and unprepared way. And then we will hate ourselves for not taking the risk." She looked at Inej and finished: "There's not enough Pekkas for everyone's revenge" Inej stared at her as the mastermind opened her mouth with one last question to ask: "Are you in?" Her eyes digged in Inej as they awaited for answer. She looked at Jesper first, as though he would somehow help. The boy just shrugged, what else to do, he is not part of it. She turned to Y/N again and a simple movement of her head made her understand and walk towards the door.

As she opened it, she turned to Inej and said: "Tomorrow night, after 4 bells until midnight, east stave, just behind Smeet Residence. You'll know." and left. Jesper watched Inej dragging her finger along the map and stopping at the possible building Y/N mentioned. She examined it, the boy could almost hear her mind as she thought about the route she'll take, her eyes caressing the paper streets and houses. Smeet residence belongs to Cornelis Smeet, he played cards with him before when they tried to save Inej from Van Eck. The feeling of nostalgia and warmth hit him. Oh, to go back as things were.

"Do you really trust her?"

"Did you trust she won't hurt you when you brought her to Wylan's house?"

He smiled, he really shouldn't have done that. Even when the question was probably rhetorical, he answered with a serious face. "Yes." Y/N seemed like anything but a liar. Sure, she didn't tell them much about her or the plan, but she didn't feed them lies so they would agree. And he did felt safe with her on that night. He didn't know her for long, but a trace of trust began in him. Inej, as if his thoughts written themselves on his eyes, knew what he was thinking about and smiled.

"Then yes, I trust her."

Oh, how he missed Inej.

--------------------------------------------

She cursed herself with every step she took.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

It rang in her head every time her lungs ate the air.

Bad idea. Bad idea. Bad idea.

Yet everything stopped when she was staring at the tall bulding present at the very end of 5th Harbor. After Y/N spat out her trauma on Kaz, she sent a letter to her employer, who unfortunetely happened to be Deln. She never wanted to see him again and after meeting him in the church, she somehow got over the fact that she has to take her payment from him, so encoutering that man twice was unavoidable. Yet she almost puked when she wrote the letter that was begging him to see her. The letter didn't say much, she wanted to tell him about the plan personally, so feelings could be voiced and maybe even manipulate him to cooperate. Y/N also chose to tell him right before the plan starts, so he wouldn't have a choice or time to make up his mind. She has yet to admit Deln is crucial to her plan though, Rollins won't go alone without him present and will run if he won't see him there, a bussiness partner, a person that sold her to him all those years ago,

an old friend.

A chill ran down her back, even though it was quite a warm evening, no wind at the sea either. She looked at the watchtower again. The Council of Tides was supposed to look out for the sea and harbors, but one hardly saw them. As far as Y/N knew, the stadwatch was patroling the harbors. She wondered if anyone is up there, if the council even existed. They could have just built many watchtowers and manipulate a feeling of safety into people. Trust is a powerful tool. At that moment, Y/N felt uncertain that Deln will arrive. She chose to meet with a slaver at the council's feet. Not that they would care about some barrel rats, but he could play a scaredy cat.

The sound of heavy boots on the cobblestone, that decorated almost the whole Ketterdam, and the feeling of the world closing in on her while a heavy stone crashed her chest, the feeling she only gets around one person, were the signs Deln wasn't afraid. Y/N listened to him creeping closer, the old urge to run fighting with her, before she finally turned around and faced him again after 11 days.

"Snowflake" he exclaimed happily, the word shooting Y/N in her throat, drying it up. She hated how afraid he made her feel. It's been years, she was supposed to move on. Hopefully, she will after this is over. Maybe the afterlife exists and will forgive her for her sins after all. That gave her hope and courage to form a fake smile for the show. "Deln." she greeted him with a nod. The man stopped before her and put his hands on his hips, shaking his head with a smile. He seemed very pleased to see her, what a disturbing thing to notice. "Oh, it has been far too long."

As much as she needed to play nice, Y/N didn't resist rolling her eyes at that. "Could we not?" she tried to not let the harsh tone into her voice, but expected failuire. Deln just chuckled upon her response, but his smile disappeared shortly after, the friendly tone nowhere to be found when he asked: "What do you want? Job's done?" Y/N quietly sighed in relief he was finally himself before answering. "Almost. I came here to offer you a first row view at the murder of Pekka Rollins. The price? I get to use you as a distraction." the hitman smiled and tried to sell it to him as traders on the streets taught her. As much as he loved a good advertisement, Deln shook his head and scoffed.

"Still too proud to ask me for help?"

If I was proud, you'd drown in your blood 10 days ago.

"You will just stand around, doing nothing, watching your enemy to die." she said instead, "I'd even say I'm helping you."

Deln smiled and turned around to walk in circles, he always did that when thinking. The waves crashed as the sun almost fell asleep behind horizont, first and only stars slowly lit their light in the deep blue sky. Y/N wished Ketterdam was clearer, so the stars could shine brightly as they deserved. The slavery she lived in had always a hole in the roof in the back. When she couldn't sleep, she used to look at the night heavens above, naming the few little planets present. There were always only five she could see. First was named Fala, it was the smallest star out of all of them, easy to remember. Second got the name Nerezza, that happened to be the first star that appeared and the last to go away. For the third star Y/N came up with Lilith, named after a child that died by the cruel hand of Deln, she was the brightest. She didn't named the last one for a long time, it wasn't special, just lonely and always the farthest away from the rest. Yet after Rollins took her and then she returned to the place she hoped to never see again, the fifth star shined brighter than ever, still alone, but the four seemed to bow to it. Just then, full of anger and spite, she named them all.

"Oh, Y/N." his voice woke her up and the girl saw him stop. His back faced her and she could fully see the hump in it, his spine visible in the plain shirt he wore. Deln suddenly turned around, his brows furrowed, eyes darted in her, deep in thought. He realized.

"I'm already a part of this, huh?"

Y/N thought of the messanger that patiently waited for the 7th bell to ring through the city. "Rollins will expect you, he is only coming because of you," she inhaled the salt wind from the sea,

"he will die tonight because of you."

Deln's eyes showed he finally got the full importance of his part. Y/N knew she wouldn't have to bother with retelling her plan, she just needed to let him know Rollins will be alone and in the streets. And all of that depends on him, he cannot back out if he wants Pekka dead, because he is already involved.

"Everything fails without me."

He made himself sound important, which he was, but Y/N still cringed. He won't even move a finger and still praised himself for helping. She put it past her though, the 7th bell rang. The message is on it's way. "In a few minutes," the hitman started to walk slowly to Deln, "Pekka Rollins will get a message from you, saying you want to discuss your affairs. You told him to come alone, a conversation between 4 eyes. You also mentioned me being there, as a ransom in your favor." She wanted to continue, but the man stopped her. "Hold on, why do you think Rollins wants to do anything with you?" Y/N stopped as he interrupted and swalllowed when she was reminded of the night they kindapped her.

"If you wouldn't have left me, there wouldn't be a point of kidnapping."

"There is nothing sweeter than a family reunion."

"He hates leaving traces behind." Deln's eyes were pinned on her, but he was thinking behind them. There was no turning back. The messanger had to be close to Rollins now. If he won't be there, Y/N won't kill him and Rollins will probably come after the slaver. Not that she cared about Deln's life, Rollins killing him before she kills Rollins was her insane fantasy no amount of stolen luck could grant her. Not even the freedom papers could pride themselves as the main reason. Kaz was why she needs to finish this job. Only he deserved the revenge and she had to be the one to gift it to him. She was obssesed with the possibility of his forgiveness if she does this. It would lift up the heaviest stone on her consciousness before her deserved death.

The girl watched him as his face lit up. "How will he know it's me. There is no proof that I have sent the letter." Yet his face slowly darkened in confusion again when he saw Y/N furrow her eyebrows and smile a little.

"Because you've signed it, Deln."

He opened his mouth to protest, but nothing came out as everything connected. "The release papers." he sighed, still in awe. Y/N sighed in relief, she loved the feeling of the dominos falling perefectly on time. "You couldn't have remembered my signature. You couldn't have." it was more of a wish than a fact, he tried to convince himself there was a backdoor to this all, Y/N sealed them all though. She actually only focused on his signature, the distant feeling of an official freedom made her remember every single curve of his handwriting. When Rollins' guards were hitting her, the pain flashed it in her mind, keeping her going. Deln found her eyes and for the first time she saw fear in them. Not disgust or mockery, nor peace and happiness.

Fear. Of her.

"You little bitch." he whispered. He couldn't run, he couldn't deny anything. He was cornered. Messanger already delivered Deln's worst fear. Y/N knew he didn't want to be involved with Rollins' murder, that's why she was hired after all. His slave empire would fall if he would be accused of murdering the king of the Barrel, but if she was supposed to kill her past, she was going to kill everything.

A bell rang through the city. Quarter past seven.

Y/N looked up at the sky, a star right above her has shined her way through the mist. She recognized it immediately. "We have to go, can't leave him waiting." she stood before Deln, not moving until he does. He laughed silently, hiding behind his easy-going personality, fearing to accept his faith. After taking in a deep breath, he nodded to the side: "Lead the way."

Before they disappeared into the centre of the city, Y/N looked at her fifth star for the last time. In an hour, Rollins might be dead, Deln will take the blame and Y/N might get her peace in hell. The realization pained her, but she also saw the warm embrace of closure behind it.

A name of the star ran through her head. Little Y/N's whispered it into her ear as the wind picked up.

Karma. Coming for them all.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Kaz coughed when the water reached his nose, filling it up so he couldn't breathe, even though air was all around him and the hallways of the Emerald Palace were dry. Everytime they rounded a corner, one of the two Dime Lions that dragged him along moved his hand across his biceps, causing the waters wetting new parts of his body.

People say Kaz always has a plan and a backup plan for everything, and they are right. However, that was before Y/N appeared and claimed the spot in his heart and mind that he thought was either abandoned or dead. When the frustration he had on himself fizzled out, his cane was already carrying him to the steps of Pekka's place, knitting a quick plan on the way. Kaz thought the deed was done, when he ordered Rollins to say his brother's name and made him believe he buried his son, but apparently it wasn't enough. It will never be, Jakob Hertzoon had hurt many people, not just them. There could be other fools with dead siblings or parents, begging for revenge every night. Stupid kids, as he was once. He couldn't help them, but Dirtyhands will feel enough joy for all of them once the only thing functioning will be Rollins' heart.

That is for Y/N to take.

As he was slowly getting closer to Pekka's office, he didn't doubt the guards will be the easiest part. An old flame in him was ignited and it won't be put down 'till the blood paints every wall of this place. The guards stopped and tightened their grip as one of them opened a door to the office. Kaz thought of just throwing up on them, but kept it in until they pushed him on the floor and released their touch. He coughed again and the water disappeared once he took in the hard wooden floor. His ears picked up voices and the sight of his cane being handed to Rollins, then the men left and he was left alone with the lion.

Kaz pushed his face off the ground into a seated position. His cane hit the floor once before Rollins started talking: "Let's not waste our time Brekker. What do you want?" His accent rolling down his tongue as Kaz tried to stand up. The office looked smaller than his, but it gained one advantage on him once he saw the part of the room that served Y/N as backround when she said his name for the first time in a long time. Her voice still echoed somewhere in his mind and he could never find it and catch it. He never wanted to see her again, in all honesty he just wanted to put her in Hellgate, so she would never be anywhere without his knowledge again, but the R on his shoulder urged him to do this, to get their revenge and to see her at peace.

He cursed that R everyday.

When he was on the way up from his knees, a crow head digged into his shoulder, making him to look at the disgusting face the other person wore. His eyes yelled an answer into Pekka's and he frowned in annoyance once he understood. "Why do you all suddenly hunger for blood, eh? You had to plan this with her, ain't a chance you didn't." he complained while releasing a tension in Kaz's shoulder, letting him to stand up. The boy hated the mention of Y/N, even though he didn't say the girl's name, the knowledge about her could be heard. It only pour gasoline in the fire his eyes flashed. But Kaz wouldn't let him see, Rollins still had no idea Y/N visited the bastard and that they already caught up on the lost time. There was chance he knew, yet he would deny it even if she confessed into Rollins' face.

"Who are you talking about." It wasn't a question, he challenged him to talk about Y/N. However Kaz's fears became true when the man laughed exaggeratedly. "Oh come on! I know you broke her out of my house boy, don't pretend to be dumber than you are." Rollins sat down the cane by his table and reached a hand out for a bottle of whiskey. The sound of liquid knocking on the glass was followed by Pekka's hand that flipped the cup's contents inside his mouth. He'd let him have his last drink, after Dirtyhands is through with him, he'll probably throw it back out. Fingers tapped on the wooden table, disturbing the silence Kaz couldn't handle. "So, why are you doing it. For her?" The last sentence was mocking and rhetorical, quite ironic that it's the only right reason. Kaz limped slowly closer to his table, if he could get to the right spot, he should be able to pick his cane up.

With the 7th bell ringing in the distance, Rollins swallowed his second drink before he started to speak again: "She's not worth it son." Kaz noticed his eyes wandered into afar, making it a good oppurturnity to knock him out. Only if the sudden pain in his stomach caused by the petname disappeared. "You don't even know her, the things she's done." Wrong, thought immediately Kaz. She told him her entire life, leaving out only her birth maybe. But he tied his tongue and imprisoned it behind his teeth due to the concatration he fixed on his only weapon. Rollins didn't mind, he continued gladly to think about the old days.

Kaz's heartbeat fastened everytime he mentioned her, that Nina could be able to pick it up. This moment was one of the many recent, when he desired to go reverse time. Hell, delete it if needed, he just wished to be the 17 year old boy again, planning heists with his Crows, rolling his eyes at the overly-sweet endless pining between Jesper and Wylan, hearing Matthias call him numerous demonic and cursed names, entertaining himself by watching Nina and Inej silent-laugh at something stupid when he was bored. He's glad everyone is safe and that they persued their life callings, but some changes are hard to swallow and this one was still hot to eat. This crave of his heart made itself known before, last time when he saw Y/N in this very office, but now it altered a little, bringing him shame and joy at the same time.

Kaz could see a new person in the picture, laughing along side with the girls, learning Fjerdan solely for the purpose of mocking him, teasing Jesper and Wylan for being so corny. The person didn't fit the timeline, but that was besides the point. He could see her with him, by his side. It squeezed his heart and he didn't know if it's a hug or an attempt to crush it.

The door creaking turned his head around, stopping his hand just mere inches before his cane. A messanger. Rollins walked past Kaz and without a word, the newly present man handed him a letter and left. As the door shut, Kaz's hand made contact with the cane. Rollins' low and weak laugh called to his attention and once his eyes settled on him, the man brought his own pair up. The smile should've already warn him, but his ears waited to hear the conformation. Pekka lifted the letter to Kaz's eye level, as if he would see the small letters from their distance. Yet he knew what it was for sure once the receiver said:

"Speaking of the devil."

Moments after, the man whistled and within a second his guards busted the room, handling Kaz again. The boy tried to fight the hands off, he leaned back and then forth quickly, swinging his cane right after they let go a little, striking one in the stomache. The other got hit in the neck, but before he could finish either of them, a back- up came to aid, trapping him with their arms. He threw himself to sides, trying to loosen up their grip, however it seemed to seal him closer every move. Rollins' hearted laughter played to this scene and his voice continued with the same attitude after Kaz gave up. "Should've brought a gun on me son!" he laughed as he delivered his advice.

He could bring a gun, he could bring his whole crew, but the urge to kill him with his bare hands and stained his clothes with Hertzoon's blood was a virus that have spread all over him, controlling his doings and feelings. If holy water isn't enough to kill the devil, gun would be useless against Pekka Rollins.

The man wiped off tears from laughter and looked at the helpless boy. His hand stretched out to him with the letter between his fingers, his feet erasing the rest of the space. Kaz tried to avoid reading the letter, knowing it won't bring nothing else but additional pain. He often wondered how much of it can still fit in his heart. Of course when his view was filled with Y/N's handwriting and he had no other sight to see, he studied every line. Her signature writing didn't change much, it was still horrible. For a slave, it was a miracle to write at all though. He remembered having trouble to read the love note she'd written him, Jordie wasn't as helpful as he thought he would be, but Kaz lost the need to understand it. He could always find the little heart on every single one of those, that was plenty for him.

This note lacked hearts though, it also was readable and no love was expressed. It was signed by the slavor, Deln she named him. When the letter mentioned Y/N his heart fell. This was the plan to kill him.

"I mean," Pekka began to move his mouth again as he freed Kaz's eyes of the paper, "I'm told to go alone. But I won't mind the company."

He damned his pride for not bringing the gun after all.

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE, MORE BLOOD Vol.13 Kino [Track 2]

Original title: 寒冷

Source: Diabolik Lovers More, More Blood Vol. 13 Kino [CD not owned by me]

Audio: Here (15:28 ~ 29:54)

Seiyuu: Tomoaki Maeno

Translator’s note: I was already kind of curious about the contents of this track from reading the title, but as soon as the MC returned from the cafeteria with a popsicle, I already knew what was going to happen. I can really imagine the struggles of having a boyfriend like Kino who loves pulling pranks on you. Although compared to some of the other stuff the boys have done to her, being teased with a popsicle isn’t even all that bad. Seeing him try and make it up to her afterwards made for a cute moment as well.

Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 + Epilogue

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Track 2: Coldness

“ーー And then I ended up arguing with Yuuri over who is correct. What do you think? Which one of us was right?”

You hesitate.

“Seems like you’re having trouble answering my question. Don’t hold back and just tell me. In return, I’ll punish you if you don’t say it was me.”

You frown.

“You’re struggling that much? Guess I have no other choice. I’ll give you some time. Try and come up with an answer by the end of classes today.”

The two of you come to a halt.

“...So, is this the classroom we had to move to? (1)”

You explain.

“The science lab, huh? It’s really such a pain that science classes take place in a different classroom. Oh well, guess it’s fine. Hurry up and open the door.”

*Rattle*

“...Hm? What’s wrong? You’re not going inside?”

You close the door again.

“...Eh? Why did you close the door again? Don’t we have class here?”

You tell him it’s the wrong room.

“Haah!? Who goes to the wrong classroom!? Unlike me, you’ve been going to this school for quite some time, right?”

You apologize.

“Honestly...I don’t know whether you’re just slow-witted or if you actually have a few screws loose...”

You seem confused.

“Eh? What’s weird?”

You tell him there seem to be more doors than usual.

“What are you saying? You’re just imagining things, no? There’s no way the number of doors would suddenly increase. Doesn’t it just feel that way? It’s no good to try and blame your own mistakes on someone or something else. Also, that barely makes for a decent excuse.”

You insist.

*Dingー Dongー ・ Dingー Dongー*

“Ah-aaah...Right, right. There’s more doors than usual, huh? Anyway, the bell of the next period just rang. We won’t make it in time for our class so what should we do?”

You frown.

“Well, if we’re confirmed late, might as well say ‘screw it’, right?

You tilt your head to the side.

“You know, let’s just skip class.”

You protest.

“If we go now, we’ll just get scolded for being late, right? So why not? ...Come on, this way! Let’s go!”

Kino drags you along.

*TIMESKIP*

“Fufufu~ I’m almost done with this quest...”

*Tap tap*

“Ahー But before that, I have to use this item.”

*Tap tap*

“Hm? What do you want? I’m busy playing my game right now.”

You seem anxious to get in trouble for skipping.

“You’re still worried about that? We already skipped class, so there’s nothing we can do about it now.”

*Tap tap*

“Isn’t spending time out on the rooftop during class something you have to do at least once while you’re young? We’re here now anyway, so you should try and have some fun as well.”

You frown.

“No buts! ...Ah, I get it.  You end up having unnecessary worries because you’re bored, no? In that case, I’ll give you something to do.”

You tilt your head to the side.

“There’s a cafeteria on campus where you can purchase food and such, right? Go buy me something there.”

You ask him what to get.

“Hmー Let’s see...What to choose? ...Then, how about you get something you think I’d like?”

You want him to be a little more specific.

“What would that be? The whole point is that you figure it out.”

You whine.

“It’s not difficult, is it? If you’ve been keeping a close eye on me, it should be a piece of cake! ...Pick the thing that would make me the most happy! Alsoーー”

*Rustle*

“You better not keep me waiting, so I expect you back here in ten minutes, okay? If you’re even one second late...You’ll get a pentalty.”

You flinch.

“Come on. Hurry up.”

You run away.

*TIMESKIP*

*Creaaak*

“Ah! You’re finally back...!”

You ask if you made it back in time.

“Haah? What are you saying? You didnt even come close to making it back on time. Just how far did you have to go for those?”

You explain.

“You got lost? You’ve been a student at this academy for a while, haven’t you? That doesn’t make any sense. Stop making those lousy excuses.”

You try and defend yourself.

“Hmm~? So you got the location of the cafeteria wrong? I guess you went down the wrong stairs or something? Oh well, whatever. More importantly, hurry up and hand it over. You obviously got one of my favorites, right?”

*Rustle rustle*

“...Eh? That?”

You nod.

“Ice cream...? Haah...”

You frown, asking him if he doesn’t like ice cream

“It’s not that ice cream’s bad or anything but...Why didn’t you get me guava juice? You know that I like it, don’t you?”

You tell him that wasn’t an option.

“Haah!? They don’t sell it here!? They really should reconsider their line-up then. But that doesn’t matter, does it? Not only did you make me wait forever, and on top of that, you weren’t able to buy something which would make me happy. Fufu~”

*Rustle*

“This calls...for a punishment.”

You protest.

“No point in fighting back. ...Come here.”

Kino pulls you close.

“Gotcha. When I’m holding you tightly from behind like this, you can no longer get away, can you? That being said, this ice cream has been well chilled. I’m sure it would feel extremely cold if I were to press it against your skin. For example...Against the back of your nape.”

*Rustle*

You flinch.

“You’re already reacting that strongly from just slightly brushing it across? I wonder what would happen if I were to slip it inside your clothes then? Aren’t you curious?”

You shake your head.

“Oh come on~ No need to be modest. Come on...”

*Rustle*

He presses the ice cream against your bare skin as you shriek.

“...Ahaha! Did you hear yourself just now? Well, I guess it would feel cold and disgusting to have an entire popsicle slide down your back. Ah-aah...Your uniform’s a mess as well.”

You call him out for bullying you.

“I’m not being mean, am I? It’s a punishment after all. Besides, that scream just now wasn’t half bad, you know? I’d love to hear it one more time.”

You tell him the ice cream has already melted.

“Guess so. You didn’t buy more than one popsicle after all. ...But you know, I have this.”

*Cling*

“If we use the hourglass to reload, the ice cream and your uniform will return to their original state. You should be grateful.

*Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock - Tick tock*

ーーー

*Creaaak*

“Ah! You’re finally back...! ...Hehe, you gave the exact same reaction as earlier. Why are you looking around in confusion? I told you I would reload, didn’t I? Time got turned back. You remember what happened earlier, don’t you?”

Kino approaches you.

“Exactly. Seems like you properly recall. I pulled you close like this...”

*Rustle*

“...And played with you using this popsicle you bought, didn’t I?”

*Rustle rustle*

“Say...There’s something I’m curious about. I can test it out, right? You already know just how cold this ice cream is. The chilled sensation from having it directly pressed up against your skin. So I was wondering...How will your body react if I repeat the same action one more time, now that you’re already well aware of how it’ll feel?”

You try and get away.

*Rustle rustle*

“...Woah there! You better don’t think I’ll let you get away!”

He grabs hold of your wrist.

“...There. Gotcha.”

*Rustle rustle*

“No point in resisting. There’s just no way you could get away from me after all.”

Kino opens the popsicle.

“There we go~ It’s time for the ice cream you’ve just been dying for~ If I run it across your nape like this...”

You flinch.

“Exactly. You can feel it even stronger when you already know what to expect, don’t you? I wonder if it’s your brain playing tricks on you...?”

*Rustle*

“...Hm? What? Throwing in the towel already? Guess I have no other choice. In that case, I’ll warm you up next.”

*Sluuuurp*

“Hm...The taste of this popsicle is pretty mediocre. I don’t think I could finish the whole thing. The person who bought it should take responsibility and eat it all instead. Here you go.”

He forces the popsicle inside your mouth.

“You’re whining was starting to annoying me, so this works perfectly. Keep it in between your teeth for a bit, okay? Meanwhile I’ll dig into this to cleanse my palate. In the end, it seems like I...”

*Rustle*

“...enjoy this the very best. mmh...”

Kino bites you.

*Gulp gulp gulp*

“Nn...You like this too, don’t you? The whimpers slipping through...They’re different compared to when I teased you earlier. They’re sweet yet sorrowful. Almost as if you’re begging for me.”

*Rustle*

“Let me hear more of those...”

*Rustle*

“...Ah!”

You drop the popsicle.

*Splatter*

“Ah-aah...The popsicle fell down. Your skirt’s a mess now as well.”

You apologize.

“Why are you saying sorry? Ahー Because you dropped it? I don’t care, really. ー Wait, what’s with that face? You’re in tears. Your lips are all sticky from the ice cream as well. I’ll wipe you clean, so look this way.”

You turn around.

*Rustle rustle*

“Perhaps I took my teasings a little too far? ...Were you scared?”

You nod.

“I see. ...Fufu. You’re such a crybaby, how cute~”

*Smooch*

“There, all clean. Now cheer up, okay? You don’t want things to become awkward between us, do you? I guess that leaves your skirt...Honestly, it’s kind of a drag, so would you like me to turn back time to before you dropped the popsicle?”

You ask him if it’s okay. 

“Of course I don’t mind. ...But in return, I might mess with you again~”

You protest.

“I’m just kidding. Let’s kill some time together until classes end? Ah! But don’t get the wrong idea, okay? I’ll still use the hourglass. ...Well then, how should we enjoy ourselves next~?”

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) At Japanese high schools, students stay in the same classroom for 90% of the classes. For some subjects like science, art, etc. they may move to a different classroom which has the right facilities and material. These are called 移動教室 or ‘idō-kyōshitsu’. 

[gaulemtypefemale-dm-l-016]

3d, 5d and 5n? :)

3d. Rank the endings (for one game of your choice or the true endings of the 3 games)

In terms of all games, I think I would rank 999 ending > VLR ending > ZTD ending.

However, each one of them gave me a different experience so I really enjoy them as a whole package. For example, when I finished VLR, I felt I needed more. The experience had been so intense that I wanted to play ZTD right away. On the other hand, ZTD's true ending made me feel very introspective, even if the writting felt lacking sometimes.

I ranked 999's ending higher because I feel like 999, in general, felt more concise and it had my favourite cast. I loved the epilogue and how the game could simply end there and not even have a sequel. It felt like a complete game by itself. Of course I was a bit desperate with the situation between Akane and Junpei, and how they ended up in separate ways, but it felt fitting.

As for VLR I really enjoyed the plot twist. I felt the true ending was a bit too long, like a never ending ride, but, despite the confusion, I enjoyed the general explanation of it. I also enjoyed the sad tone of the story, and I absolutely loved some of the reflections from the another time (even if not considered as canon).

However, the game asked for more.

And there's where ZTD enters. I had some problems getting used to the cinematics of the game and the characters, and, at the time I played, some things felt weird, like how suddenly it seemed so simple to just shift. As for the ending, I really like how it was put as a moral dilemma, a ZERO TIME DILEMMA, in fact, the situation of shifting (not sure if to think that the shifting until then had been made too easy, or it was purposedly used so that only later they had to face the fact that they doomed their other selves). The ending made me think a lot about how, despite them being alive at the end, despite this seemingly good turn of events, it still felt all like a gamble, as the begining of the game. In the end we didnt' even know the identity of the terrorist, and they still doomed their first ending iteration, for their last iteration (which has the trauma from playing the decision game).

Delta's character is generally a source of memes due to his quotes, but his words still left some marks. His whole plan was convoluted. It's almost like the second nonary game, but here the multiple timelines had to happen in order for this future to come true, and for him and Phi to exist.

I also love the ending theme and it plays very well, complementing this interminable dilemma mood the characters live through. I also love how, in the end, we can interpret Delta as a character portraying the player: "One of Delta's motivations for creating the Decision Game: he can't shift himself, but can read the minds of those who experienced other timelines, and was interested in learning about them. Given that Delta is technically the Player Character, this is probably a meta-narrative commentary on player curiosity" (taken from ZTD TV tropes).

So in the end this was all to say that, despite liking 999's ending better for how solid it seemed to me, the other games' endings also deserve a lot of credit for their worth.

(I didn't know the ranking was for the endings of all games or one in specific so I went with this, but I may try to rank for a specific game later).

5d. Do you consider Another Time to be canon? If so, do you have any theories on ?'s identity

I think at the time I finished ZTD I found that Another Time was not considered canon. Nevertheless I really liked its contents so I like to pick elements from it and incorporate in canon. One of my favourite part of it is Tenmyouji’s thoughts on this plan of jumping to the past and change it. The bikers’ story is one of my favourites there and I felt it was a message about how, despite losing Akane, he found Quark along his journey in this doomed timeline, and how, even if their plan works, this timeline still exists. There is also a possibility that the transporter was hinted with Alice and Clover’s conversation, but not sure if that was the alternative or not.

About ?’s identity, I think my favourite take is the player. Because the player is an irregular identity in the game. To get the Another Time, the player has to achieve certain goals, such as collecting the golden files. The player can play with timelines as much as they want since they can jump through the flowchart freely and they even command Sigma’s action through the game (which can explain the way sometimes he was surprised with his vote during the Nonary Game). And I believe it refers to the player coming from the true ending of ZTD, but this is merely speculation...

Since Delta could be meta commentary about the player, I also liked to think he could be involved in this, but since he can’t shift , it’s much improbable. However I like how there is a link with how the end of ZTD is Carlos pointing the gun at him, which represents a situation of danger that could trigger a shift.

Other than this, I think I haven’t thought much about it. I may have read some theories some time ago, but I don’t remember them now...

5n. Do you have any fanart/fanfic/fangame recommendations?

Fanart is probably what I consume the most. I really love @/keycrash’s works, @/kisschasey’s portraits of Snake, @/caelytrix, the way @/aestheticcannibal portrays Kyle and Dio, @/i0n4 and much more artists. I always try to reblog the amazing works I find from the fandom and sorry for not listing more, nor any work in specific.

Twitter is also a very good media to find a lot of good ZE fanarts. Not all of them are tagged, but generally searching the ZeroEscape tag allows you to find very cool works, along with other tweets and memes.

Now, on fanfiction I can’t really give much recommendations because I haven’t read many. I mainly read some from Zecret Santa event. I remember enjoying the one I got about Tenmyouji and Quark because I really love their wholesome relationship. Link here

There’s also one I once started to read but didn’t finish due to lack of time, but which was VLR’s story told from Phi’s POV and I found the idea extremely interesting although I still haven’t read it. It’s pretty long too. Link here

Now for an idea which concept I feel it’s funny and interesting: I once found one that was a Nonary game in the IKEA. I actually haven’t read it but at the time I thought it was a really funny idea. Link here

I’ve only read the first recommendation, but thought I should leave the other two, as they seem interesting and funny.

Sorry for the long post and the delay in replying. I also apologize for any mistake I made. I’m a bit tired but I really wanted to finish this post.

And thank you for the asks. I really enjoyed the question about Another Time and, although I’m pretty bad at ranking things, I like discussing and going through the games’ content again.

[reaperkaneki]

finished the finale ending and [redacted]’s ending which means that, aside from a couple bad ends and the best epilogues (saved thise for after), i’ve finished all the guys’ routes :)

i have to say, i really liked this game. it has pretty much every feature i ask for in an otome (except a flowchart, i guess, im very lazy so i prefer flowcharts to chapter select, but that’s strictly a personal preference):

- 5+ routes (i maintain that the absolute minimum for an otome is 4 plus a secret/true end), which piofiore hits almost exactly

- characters are adults who... uh, fanservice, thanks. i am looking disrespectfully. i can’t relate to teenagers anymore and it makes more sense for everyone to be an adult seeing as they’re established, distinguished, competent mafioso. it makes the setting more realistic and yeah maybe i wanna see ikemen flirting in adult ways, i have the right!

- i would say this game hits a good ground between character and romance and plot. it’s not as gripping and well paced and full of suspense as, say, cxm, but it has its moments. the plot is more there to prop up the romance than it is for itself, bht there’s a fair bit of interesting political/economic intrique and power struggles. it has a semi-enforced route order for a reason. i still think it was an odd choice to put dante as one of the first routes and gil as the last, seeing as dante’s the lore heaviest and gil is comparatively lighter and softer with very little conflict, but the last route directly branches off of his, i guess, specifically because of that.

- all characters change roles depending on what route you play. this is a good thing, as it means we see sides to them we wouldn’t see if they were, friendly or vice versa, but it also means that they can seem weirdly ooc if they’re an antagonist. (orlok’s route comes to mind, everyone was holding the conflict ball in that one...) still, everyone has the capacity to be reasonable in certain circumstances, and that helps to humanize even the side characters who sometimes seem to only be there to stir up conflict (like the twins, who as antagonists are creepy twin children who see murder as play, except actually they’re super cute and fun children who take a liking to lili... who also see murder as play).

- a wrap-up during each ending that tells us what happened to most of the major characters. sure, it’s all very well to end the route on a kiss or whatever, but, like, what happened, how did they finish resolving the situation? piofiore gives that for all of its full endings—best, normal, and bad, which i definitely appreciate. it also makes it more obvious the difference between the normal and best endings: it can all come down to a single choice (or two, or more if you’re shitty at games like me).

- short stories in gallery, which is extremely typical and also bare minimum but nonetheless appreciated. pretty much every otome has this or an epilogue, because, like, c’mon, gotta give the fans some sugar after the end of the route!

- speaking of sugar, post-best end epilogues! i haven’t played any yet because i’m Savoring them, but there’s nothing wrong with more fanservice and more detail on What Happened Next. if you’re counting, that means three pieces of post-best end content (the wrap-up after the credits, the short story, and the epilogue).

- actual, fleshed out bad ends that aren’t afraid to get Real Fucked Up—and bad end epilogues! the tragedy is real and it is palpable and maybe even delicious. or just plain horrible, take your pick. i wish more games had continuations of their bad ends! it’s so good!

- one big thing that pissed me off is how to get endings. the status indicator isn’t very helpful at all—it will pretty much only show differences once you’re locked into an ending :/ plus there are two stats for each guy, your typical affection stat and then a stat unique to each character. once again, no distinct indicator that this second stat even exists. the choices can also get oblique and counterintuitive; i must’ve gotten nicola’s bad ending like five times :/ this might be a bonus to some people, since it’s not just (click) oh that one didnt give me a heart icon, i’m gonna reload (rinse and repeat), it actually requires a little effort.

- [big spoiler territory] a secret character. i love secret characters. they’re great. their routes do vary wildly in execution—they’re usually either super rushed and short, and disappointing, or they’re the final true route—and i think piofiore hits in the middle. on the one hand, they made the antagonist a route, every otome game should make the antagonist a route if he’s a hot ikemen with an a-list voice actor. i love love love that (and honestly, most of the characters become antagonists in any route but their own, especially yang, who is by definition a card-carrying villain and once again, thank you oiofiore for this trash man’s route).

on the other hand, by virtue of splitting from chapter five of another guy’s route, and being a secret character who doesn’t show up as himself in any other route, he doesn’t get a ton of time to get development. he also falls victim to a lot of “traumatic past excuses murder” kind of tropes that are tired and gratuitous. (but seeing as the rest of the cast has probably killed even more people than him, i’m willing to let that slide.) i still genuinely enjoyed his romantic ending (helps that he’s, like, phantom of the opera meets count of monte cristo ughhh) and am looking forward to his epilogue :) [/end major spoiler]

all in all, good game! enjoyed, would recommend, has plenty of content for what it is. the darker themes are there, and it doesnt shy away from things like torture, character death, and such, especially in bad endings, but it wasn’t suuuuper dark (aside from the bad endings). it was pretty fun.

[animmania]

HOMESTUCK EPILOGUE MEAT THOUGHTS **SPOILERS**

So i want to make some things clear before i get started. I have only read the meat option. I wanted

to also read candy so I could make this with all possible information. But meat left such a bad taste

in my mouth. And after a friend of mine told me somethings about candy i just couldnt bring my

self to read more of it.

So yes i did not like the epilogue. And this is mainly just going to be talking about some of the main

reasons why i didnt like it. And if you did like it or disagree with anything i say. Thats perfectly fine

In fact im honestly happy you could like it. I really really wanted to like it but i just. Couldnt.

So what about it gave me so much issues. The first one is the style and format and feel of it. You will

notice its very different looking from homestuck. Being all text and having 2 routes to choose from.

And alot of it feels very differnt then homestuck and to be fair. Thats the point. I had to have it

explianed to me but it seems to be mostly going for the style and taking common tropes in fan

fiction. The look of it is apprently based on a fan fiction site and the meat route is meant to be the

darker fan fiction while the candy is meant to be happier one where every ship comes true. (altho

from what ive heard it seems more depressing then the darker route so i dont get how that works but

oh well) but that is the point. So it would and should make sense that it dosnt feel like homestuck

right? Well. no. Because no matter what. This is still the offical epilogue to the story. You can make

it look unoffical as much you want. You can try to explain that its both in cannon but not in cannon

but at the end of the day it dosnt matter. Its still the epilogue. It was written in part by the actual

creator. Its on the offical site. In fact if you go on the site right now. Its the very first thing you see.

With right below it homestuck. If they really wanted to drive this fan fiction thing all the way

though. Then i think it both shouldnt have been on the offical site. And hussie shouldnt have

written it. They could have made its own lil site or heck maybe even put it up on the fanfiction site

they had been mimicking. But by putting it up on the offical site it defeats the idea that this is meant

to be fanfiction.

While im on the looks of the epilogue i also got to say i was really expecting it to do more with it.

I was expecting them to do some really intersesting things with it being in this new format. For

example something many people thought including my self was that once john went back into the

cannon the formating would change back into homestucks as it normally is. That would have been

really intersting and would have helped cement that that world being not in the cannon. But. no.

That never happens. It stays in the fan fiction form though out and thats just kinda it. It felt like a

waste. Even the meta narrtive i thought was really wasted. When dirk takes over its noting that

homestuck its self hasnt done in the past. If anything its less. Like remember when doc scratch

took over in homestuck. And the whole site it self changed. That was really cool and interesting.

But here....its just changes the black text to yellow. Thats it. And now the narration is coming from

him. I couldnt help but feel really let down by it. It just seemed like....such a waste.

Ok lets talk about the characters and story and my main issues with them. Now apprently alot of

people didnt like that it was getting much darker in areas but i didnt mind. Homestuck was never

one to shy away from dark or mature subjects and now that the characters are older them dealing

with more mature things makes sense. My issue with the story is actually that its trying to be a story

when its meant to be an epilogue. An epilogue. To me at least. Should be about just the characters.

Seeing how they are doing after the events of the main story and seeing maybe new struggles after

the credits. And while there is some of that here. Its not the focus and more of the focus is one this

new story starting. John having to go fight lord english. Dirk becoming evil. Jane wanting to

become president. I couldnt get into any of it and it never gave me a reason to. This is just an

epilogue.not homestuck 2. not a spin off of any sort. Its just meant to be a short thing on what

happened after the ending. The main story is already over. And its so fruasting becuase it had stuff

in it that i loved but they dont focus on it enough. Like theres a side thing where roxy mentions

that they and calli had been talking about gender idenity and how they had came to the conclsuion

that roxy is trans and uses he him/they them pronuons. That part. Made me so happy. I thought it

was amazing that they were doing this with their character and it was really interesting. But at the

same time i couldnt help but think how much if this had more of a focus on. Like they say calli and

roxy talked about this. And i cant help but think how much i would have loved to see that  

conversation

there was also this one throw away line about how rose and her wife had been talking about

adopting. And i cant even to begin to say how much id love to read a story of just them talking

about if they should have a kid. And john discovering he has depression i thought was really good

and i wish it had more focus and had him just talking more to people about it. This epilogue left me

with just wanting so much it didnt give. Now  i will give credit the roxy being trans thing didnt

just get dropped they did have it devople as time went on and it was cool but again i just wanted

more of it. The stuff with dirk and lord english just felt. Pointless. And gave me an impression that

maybe they were afraid people wouldnt be interested in the epilogue if there wasnt some kind of

stake at risk and i cant help but wonder what it would have been like if they werent in it.

My other main issue with the story is how they did  sorten characters. Some i liked for example

where johnn,roxy,dave,karkat,rose and a few others.they were good and i felt they for the most part

showed how they had grown over the years and that this would be how they would naturally be

older. But others i couldnt get behind. For examples i didnt really care how they did jade. She really

didnt add anything and most of what she was doing was hitting on dave and karkat. It felt kinda like

a waste to have her just for that. Granted they do have her get possed but by then you dont really get

any more real interaction out of her so your mostly left with how she first shows up and its just ..

weak i think i would describe it as weak. Then theres characters like jane and dirk . Jane  now being

just stright up a jerk letrally shamming jake  to hundereds of people and dirk letrally being  super

evil and doing really really fucked up things. Im not asking for characters to be perfect angels. But

this seems just to much. To go from homestuck where they had grown alot as characters and had

bettered them selfs as people. To just going to this. Its. Its very unsatisfying.

I think i would use that word to sum up meat alot. Its very . Unsatisfying.  They mention in the

choice just before you pick meat or candy. That meat would be much harder to get though. But it

would be over all better for you and more satisfying to eat. For me. That never happened. Though  

out it all i never get that satisying feeling. I never got that (oh ok this made it worth it) it never

 never happened for me and its so fruastrating because i wanted to have that feeling so badly. I

wanted to love this but so many things about it kept making it impossible for me.

And this brings me to the final thing i want to say. Maybe my perosnal biggest issue with this and

why i cant enjoy it.

But first i want to talk about homestucks ending.  To me. Homestuck ended perfectly. One could

agrue that it could have had more problems going on but to me it was what i wanted. The characters

after years of struggles. After death,pain,saddness and so many hardships. Pulled though. They

made it to the other side. They grew as people.   They bettered them selfs. And  got a happy ending

that they desvered and worked hard to get. And with the credits giving us insight to how it was

going over there. I couldnt help but be so happy at it. When i got to it i was very emtional and i just

felt it was so right . And a great   note to end homestuck on .  

But thats no longer the case. It isnt the end now. It isnt the last thing from homestuck

This is . This is the end of homestuck. This is the last note it will go out on . The epilogue. An

epilogue that. To me. Felt so unsatisfying. And put the characterss though more shit and left things

on a sad un happy note that might not get any real conlsuion. This is it. It turned an ending that

i loved. Into a  bitter sweet momment. And you could say im being over dramatic. And i would

agree. I think i am. I want to just shut up and just  enjoy this or ignore it. But i cant. My brain wont

shut up and let it go. That this last part of homestuck. Something i love so much. Had its final

momment be this. I just feel. So .  Dissapointed by all this.

Now i want to just say some quick things here. These are just my thoughts. If you liked the epilogue

or even loved it. Im so happy for you. Honestly i mean this with all my heart. Im glad people can

and have enjoyed it. And you could also make the argument that by not reading both routes that

could be why i didnt enjoy it and maybe reading both would do so. And hey. Maybe your right. But

i cant really bring my self to do. But at the very least  i got my thoughts out. And as i am wrighting

this i am already feeling so much better  and im glad i could get my thoughts out there.

[tropicalgoon]

Spoilers for the Homestuck Epilogue below.

First things first, i had caught up reading Homestuck on the exact day the Gigapause started (10/16/13). So long pauses and people arguing about canon was pretty common. Then the comic ended but later we got snapchats. Once the snapchats started coming people were unsure how ‘canon’ the snapchats were. Also    

i was surprised with how fast the rest of the Epilogue came out. I figured it would have been drip fed like the comic was but reading it now i can see why that was not the case. If you haven't read the Epilogue i have one thing to say.

PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THE CONTENT WARNINGS THEY ARE NOT JOKES.

With that out the way, i think the biggest shift in the Epilogue vs the actual comic is that everything is way more mature. While Homestuck was full of angsty, snarky teens and a lot of jokes, ironic and not, the Epilogue overall has a more somber, powerless mood to it.

Also one more thing, i do not have a fav character or ship. So that might be why im upset about how it is.

Now i read the Candy choice first so ill talk about that. Now as soon as i saw the juju i knew it was going to have an effect. And i was right, the juju makes people feel okay with their surroundings and so when John ate it he felt at ease with the chaos his life and friends were becoming. But hoo boy did everyone suck all around. 

i knew Gamzee was gonna be back and i was not wrong. i think the whole iVe bEeN GeTtIn mY MoThErFuCkIn rEdEmPtIoN On sO EvErYtHiN I Do iS GoOd was a funny bit but maaaaaan did it get a lil crazy. Jake has always been a doormat and easily manipulated. So nothing too new there but it was nice when he ran off with lil tavros. Also i guess hes the earth c equivalent to a kardashian.

 It really surprised me how fast Roxy got together with John. In fact the Candy Roxy is way different than the meat Roxy. i guess thats the juju at work. Rose was sick with an “illness” but soon after the candy was ate she got “better”. What actually happened was she stopped trying to open her mind to the infinite degree and just let herself live in the moment and be truly happy. It was nice to see her and Kanaya have a happy life, at least until everything went bad. As for Dirk i felt bad for him because he always had that whole meta textual self importance thing going on so when he offed himself i was like oh no. Its nice that him and Dave had bro-sesions.

And now time to talk about Jade, Dave, and Karkat. It feels like Dave and Karkat have mostly stayed the same with a few big differences.1) they both are a little less insufferable, 2) Karkat has accepted he is a leader and 3) their tip toeing around relationships was kinda annoying. Which brings me to Jade. She was butting into all three of their relationships trying to force them to admit feelings. While ive seen some people say Hussie killed Jade i personally dont think so. Jade was always a headstrong, stubborn person who would go after what she wanted and i mean she was on an island by herself for most of her life if she wants to have fun let her. 

Jane really went off the deep end. Which i dont think was so far off her canon personality in the comic. Her denying being xenophobic while being incredibly xenophobic was funny but also pretty real. While i didnt like they way she interacted with Jake it honestly fits in with what happens in the comic. (the trickster stuff, the crockercorp kidnapping). Her whole shadowy rise to hidden power was inevitable also i feel like she was really echoing the Condense on earth. Allowing Gamzee to spread his faith while funneling her wealth and fame into passing the policies and laws she wants. I do not think its out of character for her and Dirk to hate trolls since their lives were so affected by them. 

Johns depression clouding his judgement and making him not want to react was sad to read. It really felt like he was just drifting around, letting all of the situations and chaos just wash over him. So when he was talking to Terezi and she helped him make sense of things it was a nice turn of pace.

Speaking of Terezi, its sad how long she went chasing after (Vriska). As of this moment i dont really think the quadrant system is really in place anymore (at least relationships with humans in it). With John and Terezi talking to each other it really felt like blackrom.  “1F 1 W3R3 3V3R TO DO BL4CKROM 4G41N, 1T WOULD H4V3 TO B3 LOW K3Y”. It is sad her obsession with finding (Vriska) led to her dying in the void.

Seeing Aradia and Sollux was a surprise but they really didnt add much to anything (esp. Sollux). It was kinda funny how much of a dickhead Cade (Calliope Jade) was towards her. Cade was interesting. i really feel like she acts like she did in the comic. 

(Vriska) returning was also not a surprise. She THE most known character. Of course she would be back, but not by her own accord. She wants the spotlight, she HAS to have it. Now that she is trapped on earth c she is now out of canon and so she is out of the spotlight. Thats why she was wailing about needing to SEE it. I think its kinda funny she ends up having a quick fling with Gamzee, and he tries to sell her on his redemption arc bullshit. It really shows how far her obsession has let her fall.

And now its time for meat. Honestly im glad i read candy first because meat was really nice to read after candy. As i said with candy, i figured meat would be the more active of the two (duality like the cherubs). 

First off it was really nice to see how much Dave believes in Karkat and how he thinks Karkat would be leader earth c NEEDS. In Meat they still have their relationship drama with themselves and Jade. I really feel like shes slightly more direct in this one. After the blowup 

John dealing with Roses instructions, finding and bringing together the younger versions of themselves so they could go fight a younger Caliborn and getting sucked into the the house juju was not a surprise since its been theorized thats what would happen. Of course Rose did not warn him, or even tell him what to do. Even when the younger versions of Johns friends die and get hurt he still tries to save them. 

Jake is a very powerful figure in the new earth, he doesnt even realize it. Which leads to everyone trying to get him on their sides. I honestly feel like this is partly his page powers (but then again the classes and aspects dont mean all that much) but he has always been unconfrontational and a doormat. Dirk, Jane, Dave, and Karkat only want to use him for his ass and fame so they can further their agendas. 

i think its rather fitting that (Vriska) doesnt get to see how the battle against Lord English ended. It was GREAT to see Davepetasprite^2 make a comeback and fight Lord English. She KNOWS the final battle isnt her battle but she is still THE ONE who turns the tide. She’s the one who has brought the winning piece so its still a victory of hers by proxy. Also she does not have the talk with Vriska (rose and kanayas kid) on a clown throw pillow so she does not get to do the self reflection she needs. Instead she gets sucked into a black hole.

The Jane and Dirk combo was not surprising, they both had the hangups about Jake and i feel like it ended the same way. Once they got what they wanted it was no longer exciting, or mysterious. But reading the political sabotage and Dirks plans coming together made me realize he was using her for his own gains too. 

Now the whole Rose dying because her physical body couldn't contain the infiniteness of infinity was truly heartbreaking. Especially when Dirk was fucking with Kanaya. i do not know how much of Rose was being manipulated by Dirk and how much was her wanting to end her chronic suffering(2real4me). Addressing all of the....implications around those two. i really do not think they ran off to be together. i believe Rose is the first person Dirk has really connected with on a actual personal level. From what ive seen he does not really treat people as well... people. I think him and Rose are feeling the, “i am the only real person here and everyone else is a puppet” feeling John and Terezi was talking about. But unlike John, Dirk was never one to sit idly by, hes a mechanic after all. All the pieces have to be in place.

The whole bit with Cade and dirk taking control of the narrative was something i feel like has been building up for a long while. The unreliable narrator has been established a few times in the comic, in friendsim, and now in the epilogue. But it does raise a good question about who has been narrating the story and can they be trusted to give us the truth. We saw Dirk acknowledge that he is not unbiased and says things as he sees it. Cade says shes unbiased and just gives the whole truth but all i can think about is how she made Jane carefully cradle the juju and put it on the mantle. Watching Dirk outsmart Cade was defiently exciting to read. I cannot wait to see where all of this is leading to. 

Do i think thats the end of both of Davepetasprite^2 and Lord English? No, as the comic has always said,” Don’t turn your back on the body.” We dont know where they ended up but we’ll just have to wait for more to come out and i cant wait. Does Rose, Dirk, and Terezi (i guess) have an agenda, yes. Do i have any goddamn idea what that is? Nope, and im fine with that. Overall i enjoyed both of them.

[artificialqueens]

Here I Go Again! (Group Fic) - Epilogue - pureCAMP

A/N - important notice!! there is some smutty smutty smut smut in this, but i didnt write it!! plz send ur love to citrus aka @pianowired bc she wrote it and its absolutely excellent. plz enjoy! (and let me know if a part 2 is needed! <3)

Raja had seen a lot of action, in her time, both for her friends and for herself. She remembered her first was skinny and scrawny as most fifteen year olds are, and he hadn’t impressed her.  He was too excited to actually be inside a girl, and barely lasted two minutes. Of course, she’d told her girls all about it, how it wasn’t really worth the hype, but still worth trying.

  Then was her second, around her sixteenth birthday, and if she remembered correctly, Jinkx had gotten laid that night too. Her ginger friend had admitted that she could barely look the nameless girl in the eye when she awoke, but had enjoyed it nevertheless. In the meantime, they teased Sharon about her chastity, despite it not being her choice. The poor girl was convinced her religious mother had eyes everywhere, and she wasn’t too far from the truth. Whenever the three got up to no good, there always seemed to be someone to report back to Sharon’s mother and get her into trouble.

  For the next two years, Raja lived her life as a hoe and was thoroughly enjoying it. Her experiences ranged from poor to… satisfactory, at best, and she detailed each one to her girls, occasionally expressing her sympathy for Sharon. It wasn’t from lack of interest or trying, bless her, but her mother’s insistence on wearing that damn cross around her neck every day tended to keep boys away. Which was, of course, what the religious old trout wanted it to do.

  Both herself and Jinkx applauded Sharon when she dropped out of high school, all three of them knowing she’d fail regardless, and started to rebel a little more. Their music group was the perfect opportunity to do that - to dress up fashionably, ditch all religious memorabilia and dance away from her mother’s prying eyes. The island a little way off the mainland was their solace, and a great place to pick up boys.

  Around the summer, things changed. Their performances began to bring in more customers to the little tavern, resulting in more ‘fans’ and more guys and girls for Raja and Jinkx to have fun with. One night, she remembered seeing a young guy in the crowd, around their age, watching the show. Normally, Raja would’ve jumped him as soon as the set was over, but his eyes were on Sharon, and Sharon’s eyes were on him, and if this was her friend’s chance to get laid before she turned eighteen, then she’d have to let it happen.

  It was so much more than that in the end. Sharon, now glowing with this new life, detailed all of her experiences to them with her eyes shining. She didn’t retell the stories like Raja did, mentioning the rough movements and emotional detachment from the whole thing. It seemed as though she loved him. Of course, she told them all about going rough and hard and fast, but it always seemed to end with cuddling, with kisses, with romantic walks on the beach as the sun set around them.

  So now all three of them were living the hoe life. It was fun, but it didn’t last.

  After Justin left, Sharon became solitary. She was never around in the daytime like she normally would be, to laugh with Raja and Jinkx and listen to stories and just have fun. Raja shared with Jinkx and Jinkx shared with Raja, and they only saw her when they were performing and a few times in between. She seemed distant.

  Looking back, Raja knew now that it was because her sly dog of a once religious virgin friend had in fact been sneaking off to have rebound flings with two other guys in order to cope with her heartbreak. Back then, they’d just assumed she wanted to be alone.

  So, to cut a long story short, the last of their group to lose her virginity, and the first of the group to ever be in love with someone she’d had sex with, had fallen pregnant. For a good year after the news was revealed to them - through a skin-tight costume that wouldn’t zip up and a tummy that seemed just a little too round to be puppy fat - the hoe life died down. Raja didn’t feel like she could just run off to find a guy and fuck him when her best friend was miserable, heartbroken, hormonal and alone. Call her selfish, but she also didn’t want to be caught in the same predicament.

  With one of her best friends then busy with a newborn, Raja got back out into the dating pool, so to speak. At twenty one, she met her first husband. He was okay-looking, really, tanned with black hair and piercing eyes. Her father paid for the wedding, and he paid for Raja’s surgeries to enhance her bust, and he didn’t fuck too badly, but his lips were larger and faker than her own, and it started to put her off a little. One and a half years later, she divorced him.

  “You paying him back for those?” Sharon had joked, tickling her then-five-year-old Trixie with one hand as she gestured at Raja’s chest with the other.

  “Oh, please.” Raja had responded. “He paid for these and they’re still not as big as yours.”

  Husband number two was a little better, but not much. He owned an international cruise line, so combining Raja’s family wealth with his was pretty luxurious. For a couple of years, she hardly saw her friends, communicating mostly through letters from wherever the cruise ship took them. It was a time of expensive face creams that contained flakes of gold, designer shoes, and world tours to places she’d never even dreamed of seeing.

  But he was boring. Rich, handsome, and oh-so-boring. His every word was a drag, he was a complete drip, and he had the personality of wet toilet paper. He had to go, and two years later he was gone.

  “Gold flakes…” Jinkx had mocked. “And what else? Donkey testicles? Mashed up goats liver? None of my girlfriends have ever cared if I look a little strange.”

  Raja had shrugged and laughed. “If I want to day drink all year round, it’s the price I have to pay.”

  “God, I haven’t day drank in forever. I haven’t night drank in forever. I’m busy being an adult whilst you guys go off and single-handedly date the entire planet.”

  Husband three had taken a while to propose, which was getting on Raja’s nerves, but other than that minor flaw he was perfect. Handsome, well-off, and just the right amount of emotionally involved. He wouldn’t cling, he wouldn’t ignore her, it was just as close to perfect as she could get. That was her happiest wedding day, even if her father had drawn the line and refused to pay for it.

  It really seemed like this one would stand the tests of time and Raja’s ever-changing nature.

  “So you’ve finally found the one?” Sharon had asked, flipping through Raja’s years of wedding photos. In each picture from each wedding, Raja had a different husband and Jinkx had a different lady-friend (she wasn’t very into commitment), but Sharon had the same plus one - her daughter. It was no secret that her days of dating and sex seemed to be over already. She never expressed the feeling, but Raja could tell that it hurt her a little.

  “I hope so. You think your man is waiting for you somewhere?” Raja had replied.

  Sharon laughed mirthlessly. “Yeah, he’s out there.” She’d said bitterly. “With someone else, telling her she’s his soulmate.”

  It really did last. Eleven years they were married, and Raja was pretty content. But it seemed that all good things came to an end, whether she wanted them to or not.

  Truthfully, it was her fault. He was kind and sweet and he wanted to be a father. Raja, having intimately witnessed a pregnancy, the birth and watched the child grow up, didn’t want to be a mother. Of course it was magical for Sharon, and she’d never bash her friend for her decision - not after so fiercely defending her to people, even all these years later. Besides, she knew it would be different for her than it had been for Sharon, considering she was thirty six, twice the age that Sharon had been, but she was still put off. She’d never wanted children anyway, and the whole process freaked her out. For others, she was supportive. For herself, she was an inch away from disgusted.

  It was just one of those differences that tears people apart. Their arrangement was no longer working, not really.

  The divorce was a painful one. As she sobbed into Sharon’s chest, Jinkx awkwardly rubbing her back, it seemed to hit her at once that her friend was something of a superhero. Now that she was experiencing heartbreak, she finally understood what Sharon had been through and how hard it must’ve been to carry on. Yet the way she so expertly comforted her showed just how incredible of a mother she’d been, and how she’d relaxed into the role and learned exactly what to do.

  Last time Raja had checked, even though she swore she wasn’t going to, his new wife - blonde, pretty, the works - was six months pregnant. Fine, that was fine. He’d moved on. Raja moved on too.

  Her tricks were getting younger, truth be told. In recent years, the younger men had become even more open about their admiration for older ladies, and whilst Raja was in no way old, she appreciated the attention. With a little bit of Botox, she was pretty much the young man’s dream.

  Still, hooking up with one of Sharon’s hotel slaves, as she so affectionately had nicknamed them, felt a little strange. Karl had told her that he was twenty one, so at the very least he was older than Trixie.

  Admittedly, he was one of the better ones. He wasn’t disgustingly hairy, like some men who tried to approach her, but he also wasn’t pre-pubescent and hairless. Clean shaven, the way she liked it. He was fairly muscular, Filipino, and had a strange streak of blonde in his dark hair. Whether that was a fashion of the youth or not, she didn’t care. Raja still tugged on it in bed with him after the hen party had been infiltrated by the stag do.

  He was skilled enough that, the next morning when Raja crept away so that she didn’t have to sleep besides him any longer, she simply went to beach and lay out in the sun to relax. Her energy was somewhat spent and she needed the ache to subside before she got ready for the wedding.

  “Hey, babe.”

  Raja didn’t even bother opening her eyes. “Babe?”

  Karl lay down next to her, getting sand on the beach towel. “You heard me. I called you babe.”

  “Oh, lord.” Raja scoffed. “Babe indeed. I could be your mother, near enough. Speaking of, where is she? Does she know you’re out?”

  Karl rolled his eyes. “You can’t ignore the chemistry between us, Raj. I know you feel it. I know you felt it last night.”

  He smiled, blindingly white teeth flashing in her direction. Raja hadn’t seen teeth that white since she’d flown out to the clinic to pay for a whitening herself.

  “You’re so cute,” She teased, watching how he tried and failed to compose himself. “I know what you want, sweetcheeks. But you’re playing with fire, and your fingers are gonna get burnt.”

  Karl seemed unfazed. “What if I’d walk through fire for you? What if I’m fireproof?”

  Raja laughed, surprised at his persistence. “I like your style, kid. Just make sure you let your mother know that you’re out, honey.”

  In one smooth motion, Karl rolled over so he was positioned above Raja, kissing along the marked spots on her neck and collarbone. He might’ve been young, but he smelled like sea-salt and he tasted like honey and he sent waves of fire rolling through her body. In all honesty, he was the first to actually make Raja feel young again. Like any minute now she’d be caught, messing around in the sand with a guy she knew almost nothing about. It was thrilling, but she couldn’t exactly let him win.

  “Nice try,” Raja breathed, flipping him over. “Take it easy, slow down. That’s no way to go, now is it?”

  Pinned underneath her, Karl smiled wickedly. “I don’t suppose you wanna show me how it should be done, then?”

  Raja considered it. She could teach him a few new tricks, that would be fun. Combining the young man’s stamina with the older woman’s expertise would definitely, definitely be fun. But on the other hand, they had all the time in the world. It wasn’t like Raja had a stuffy old husband to go home to anymore - she didn’t have anyone waiting for her. Right now, the only person who wanted her attention was Karl, and he seemed happy to wait.

  Besides; she had a wedding to get ready for. She’d wasted enough precious time fooling around in the sand. If she was going to look suitable for this wedding, she needed to start getting ready early. Plus, Sharon would throw an absolute fit if she knew that Raja was distracting one of her hotel slaves.

  “Meet me after the wedding reception.” Raja told him, extending a long, tan leg close to his face. “Maybe then I’ll dance with you.”

  —

  Night had fallen by the time Trixie was changed, packed, and down at the docks ready to leave. Sharon had been rushing around in a flurry to ensure her daughter had everything she’d need, and then some. Call her over-protective and paranoid, but her little girl was leaving home for the first time, going out into the world to find adventures and experiences. It would be nerve-wracking for any mother.

  Around the four of them, a chilly sea breeze blew. The sky was inky, the sea like molten silver as the moonlight glittered off the surface. Everything was still and silent, besides the bobbing of the little boat that would be taking Trixie and Brian to the mainland. Stars twinkled high above.

  “You sure you’ve got everything?” Sharon worried, shivering on the deck. She rubbed her arms to try and warm them, and only moments later, Justin’s suit jacket had been placed over her shoulders.

  Trixie smiled, humouring her. “Yes, mom. I was sure the first time, long before you triple-checked it all.”

  Brian and Justin shared a laugh, their matching grins widening as Sharon playfully shoved them both.

  “Alright, alright. Sorry. It’s a mom thing, I guess. Worrying so much.”

  Shaking his head, Brian smiled. “Sharon, I’ll take good care of her, not that she needs it.”

  Justin chuckled. “I’m sure after being raised by you, she could take on anything.”

  “You’re probably right.” Sharon grinned. “Well. Don’t let me keep you waiting.”

  Her tone changed; quieter, a little more forlorn. It had been the most perfect day ever, and there was no denying that, but goodbyes were always difficult. Sharon’s last goodbye had been tinged with heartbreak, and this one just felt like letting go. She’d always known, really, that the tiny baby who was lulled to sleep by her heartbeat and the gentle rocking of the chair would one day have to leave home. She herself had done it, albeit under different circumstances. Even so, as a mom, she wanted to keep Trixie wrapped up in swaddling blankets forever.

  Trixie threw her arms around her in a hug, squeezing tight the way she always did. Sharon blinked back her tears when she pulled away, offering a weak smile and leaning forwards to hug Brian, too. Her heart skipped a few beats when she noticed Trixie hugging Justin, planting a kiss on his cheek and whispering her goodbyes.

  It was like they were a real family.

  “Go, go on already!” Sharon half-joked, pushing the two lovers towards their boat and trying to ignore how choked up she felt. “God, you kids… Driving me crazy, I tell you. Go on, go and see the world.”

  Justin kissed the top of Sharon’s head and began to help Trixie and Brian loading their bags onto the boat. Before long they were waving goodbye, growing smaller and smaller in the horizon. Sharon didn’t stop waving until they were a mere dot in the distance, not visible against the night sky nor with Sharon’s rapidly-blurring vision.

  “Hey, hey… It’s okay. I’m here.” Justin’s voice was gentle, calming. He pulled Sharon against his chest, sparing her the embarrassment of crying in front of him, and soothingly rubbed her back.

  “My daughter just left home.” Sharon sniffed, muffled against his shirt. “I feel like the definition of not okay.”

  He leant down and kissed the tip of her nose, making her giggle. “I know. But she said she’ll write, and she’s so excited for this. She’s like how we used to be.”

  Justin began to walk away from the docks, one hand in Sharon’s, heading towards the taverna. “Remember? Life was so exciting. The world was this brand new place and we’d get to discover it all.”

  Sharon snorted in spite of herself. “Of course I do. But don’t you think we’re a little old for that now?”

  “Old? You make us sound like pensioners.” Justin laughed. “Babe, we’re both thirty eight. Not even forty yet. That’s not old. Some people call it the prime years.”

  He nudged his wife suggestively, to which she burst out laughing. “Uh huh, sure. You really think we’re better now than we were twenty years ago? I’m saggier, fatter, wrinklier… the list goes on.”

  “You’re so stupid. I don’t see any of that.” Justin defended her, squeezing her hand. “You’re curvy, you’re beautiful… you still have those slutty lips that I love.”

  Sharon gasped and covered her mouth with her hand, acting scandalized. “Slutty lips?! And you call yourself a gentleman?!”

  Justin shrugged. “So you’re saying that when we fuck, it won’t be as good as it used to be? You’re not slutty anymore?”

  “No! I’m not saying that!”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes!”

  “I don’t know, it sounds like that’s what you’re saying.”

  “It won’t be worse! It’ll be better!”

  “Prove it.”

  The challenging gleam in Justin’s eyes sent waves of heat rolling through Sharon’s body. Fuck, she’d missed him. The taunts, the teasing, the dirty talk and the mischievous behaviour. It was ridiculous that she could still feel like she was eighteen even now, just being in his presence. He hadn’t changed a bit, and he was making her run wild.

  “We’re not going to make it to my house, are we?” Sharon asked, half-joking, half-sultry and narrow-eyed.

  Justin’s face was a picture of bliss. “Mmm… I don’t think so. But hey, I see our cabin is still standing. Maybe we should re-acquaint ourselves.”

  Sharon shook her head, laughing. “You… you’re the reason I’m so bad. Cabin it is, before I fucking explode.”

*

The two of them all but ran to the cabin, Justin’s arms flying to Sharon’s waist as she kicked the door closed. As soon as they were alone he kissed her, and it was everything and nothing like she remembered. It was the same passion, the same fire, but his soft lips were accompanied by scratchy stubble and his arms were stronger and more defined than they’d been twenty years ago.

  “Bed,” Sharon demanded as she broke the kiss, pulling Justin across the cabin and into the small, doorless bedroom. The bed was decently sized, fitted with clean white sheets that told Justin that Sharon had been taking care of the cabin even after all this time. He kissed her again, laying her down on the bed and slotting a leg between her thighs as her tongue dipped into his mouth.

  “Told you I love these slutty lips,” he mumbled against her mouth, hands pushing her skirt up her hips. Sharon chuckled, unbuttoning Justin’s shirt and shoving it off his shoulders before trailing a hand down his chest. He was softer than he’d been before, no longer skinny and gangly, and he shivered under her touch after twenty years of deprivation.

  “You’ve certainly aged better than I have,” Sharon grinned as he tossed his hair in mock vanity.

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about, babe, you don’t look a day over twenty-five.”

  Sharon scoffed. “Sure.”

  “I mean it,” he insisted, moving the top of her dress down too so that the garment was bunched around her waist. “You’re gorgeous no matter how you look. Also, no bra? Really? It’s like you planned this.”

  Sharon laughed and shrugged, her giggle turning into a low moan as Justin rolled her nipples between his thumb and forefinger. “You’ll be happy to know I decided against going commando while we sent our daughter and her boyfriend off to travel the world.”

  Justin smiled, snapping the elastic of her underwear against her hip and grinning wider when she yelped in surprise. “You’re so beautiful.”

  Sharon rolled her eyes, pulling him in for another kiss.

  “Can you cut the crap and fuck me already?” she mumbled against his lips, pulling his hands down to rest on her thighs and placing her own hands on his hips. He laughed as she cupped his growing erection through his trousers, squeezing lightly and making him groan.

  “So needy, always so needy,” he teased, shucking off his trousers while Sharon freed herself completely from her dress. She let out a low moan as his long, slender fingers teased her through the fabric of her panties, feeling her beginning to get wet from his touch. “Shh, patience, love. I’m gonna make you feel so good. Just like old times, eh?”

  “I’d say a bit different. I’m not the skinny little slip of a thing I used to be.”

  “Sharon Needles, can you stop putting yourself down for a moment and let me worship you the way you deserve? God, you’re still so stubborn.” Sharon nearly protested, but then Justin’s fingers were pushing her underwear aside and grazing over her folds, and she could only let out a soft moan. “That shut you up, huh?”

  “Shut up and fuck me,” Sharon demanded, pushing his hand away and her panties down with it. Justin shot her one of those stupidly adorable grins of his as he slid out of his own underwear and kissed at her jaw and neck again. “Jesus, babe, age made you slow.”

  “If you want to get fucked, you’ll stop complaining,” Justin growled softly, one hand squeezing lightly at the sides of her throat. Sharon felt another rush of heat pass through her body; she’d always been a sucker for Justin showing dominance, and it seemed as though nothing much had changed in the two decades they’d been apart. His hand moved to rest at the base of her throat, barely even touching her, and she raised an eyebrow.

  “You’ve still got it,” she said appreciatively. “Thought you might.”

  “Course I do,” Justin replied, sliding his hand down her body to spread her open and press a finger into her, making her whine. “You drive me crazy, Sharon.”

  “More, Justin,” she complained, arching up into his touch as he added a second finger and his thumb found her sensitive bud. “Christ, fuck me. I’ve waited long enough.”

  “We both have,” Justin agreed as he drew his fingers out of her and lined up with her entrance. “You sure you don’t wanna change positions?”

  “It’s not gonna do my back any favors,” she answered. “Told you I wasn’t the kid I used to be.”

  “Shush,” Justin bade her, running his thumb across her lower lip and gazing into her eyes with so much love she thought she might melt. She hadn’t seen him look at her like that in all their years apart, and if she was telling the truth, no one could ever fill the gap Justin had left in her life. But he was here now, his hands on her thighs, his lips on her lips, and oh, how Sharon had missed him. He was hot and hard against her, and when he pressed just past her entrance she sighed.

  “More, baby,” she encouraged, pulling him down by the shoulders to kiss the corner of his mouth.

  “You sure, love? It’s been a long time and I-”

  “I’m sure,” Sharon promised, all but a whisper against his skin. He pushed a little further, and Sharon’s back arched to take him deeper into her warmth, kissing him deep and hard. She didn’t stop until his hips were flush against hers and he was buried inside her completely, and he panted against her neck as they both adjusted to the sensations wracking their bodies.

  “You… oh, Sharon, you feel so good,” Justin groaned, gasping when she clenched around him with a smirk. When he rolled his hips, she whimpered loudly, kissing him desperately.

  “I’ve been desperate to have your cock inside me for the last twenty years,” she mumbled roughly, “Memories are never as good as the real thing. I’ve never- fuck– I’ve never been this full.”

  “No one else,” Justin promised as he withdrew a few inches before pushing back in, making Sharon gasp. “No one else can do it like you, babe. No one else can take it like you.”

  “Please, baby,” she begged as he began to increase the pace and depth of his thrusts, his grip on her hips so tight she was sure there would be bruises later. “Fuck, J-Justin…” Justin was perfection, he always had been; he filled her so completely and took her apart effortlessly, making her feel like she was coming apart at the seams and melting into the mattress. She didn’t know his history after he’d left the island– there would be time for that later –but there was no doubt that he’d only grown more skilled with age. It was like he could see right through her and into the place where she kept her deepest desires; every single thrust was perfect, his steady rhythm sending waves of pleasure through her body unlike anything she’d experienced since their last time together. He knew exactly what she wanted, what she needed, and he kissed her with all the passion and sweetness of a first love that had never really faded.

  Desire coursed through Sharon like a wildfire, igniting every nerve in her body and setting her alight with pleasure. She could tell Justin was nearing the edge from the way that his hips began to stutter slightly, but he was doing an astounding job of keeping his steady pace. Sharon pulled her legs to her chest, changing the angle and allowing him to move even deeper inside her, speeding up and fucking her harder and faster. The bed rocked against the wall of the cabin as Justin lost his controlled rhythm and gave into his body, letting Sharon pull him down for a kiss as his hips slammed against her soft thighs.

  Sharon came first, a hoarse shout of ecstasy leaving her lips as every single thrust of Justin’s hips allowed him to ram against the spot deep inside her that made her see stars. Her nails raked down his back as she threw her head back and sobbed with the sheer pleasure of it all, drawing a hiss from Justin and resulting in him planting sloppy kisses all over her mouth like a teenager with poor aim. He finished with a rough cry of “Sharon,” and a final snap of his hips, coming deep and hard inside her and all but collapsing on her chest. The two of them lay like that for several moments, completely spent and trying to catch their breath, and Sharon’s lips lingered against Justin’s cheek, her fingers running over the angry red marks she’d created on his skin.

  “I’m sorry about that,” she chuckled, “I guess you really do make me feel young again.” Justin let out a breathless laugh at that, carefully pulling out of her and moving to collapse on the bed beside her. She nestled herself into his arms, slotting her thigh between his legs.

  “Just like old times, mm?”

  “Just like the good old days,” Sharon agreed teasingly. “I have to admit, I didn’t think you’d be able to do better than we used to. I’m impressed.”

  Justin smiled lazily, shifting slightly and kissing Sharon’s cheek. “Wanna know what pushed me over the edge?”

  “Sure,” she laughed, “But proceed with caution.”

  “I was thinking about how beautiful you looked under me, and then I just had the thought pop into my head that wow, that’s my wife. You’re my wife.”

  Sharon let out an airy laugh, snuggling into his chest as he wrapped his arms around her. “Mhmm,” she hummed contentedly, “Never thought I’d see the day.”

  “…Sharon?”

  “Hm?”

  “I love you.”

  “I love you too, baby.”

  —

  Justin wasn’t an idiot.

  For his first move after the wedding, he’d told Sharon in no uncertain terms that she needed a break. After all, he’d witnessed how frantic she was for the few days that he’d been on the island. He could’ve sworn that she didn’t sleep, eat or relax at any point, just work work work. She needed a break, some time off.

  Of course, time had slightly altered his memories of just how stubborn she was. There was no way she was going to be leaving her hotel, not a chance in Heaven or Hell. She’d put her foot down and that was it, decision made.

  Only Justin wasn’t that much of a pushover, and so began their at-home honeymoon. The young men, guided by Raja and Jinkx, were in charge of the hotel for a while, whilst Sharon and Justin roamed around the island, enjoying their time together.

  It was nice to watch her relax, really. In the sunlight, with her hair cascading down her back rather than tied up, and her face smooth rather than pinched with stress, she could’ve passed for eighteen again. He’d forgotten just how captivating her eyes were, a deeper blue than any expanse of ocean they could see. He’d forgotten how funny her laugh was, the utter cackle that came out of her. He’d forgotten the beauty in her smile.

  Really, he could spend all day listing off the beautiful things that he started to remember during their at-home honeymoon, but Sharon wouldn’t give him the chance. She was as needy and desperate as the day they’d met, and he certainly wasn’t complaining.

  It wasn’t all sex, though. Sometimes they both needed a break, and they had twenty one years of talking to do.

  “Jinkx took this, about two hours after I gave birth. Look at her tiny little fist around my finger.” Sharon held up the photo so Justin could see. Heart squeezing, he wrapped his arms around his wife even tighter.

  “I can’t believe I never knew about all this.” He replied, refusing to take his eyes off his then-newborn daughter. “She looks so much like you.”

  Sharon chuckled. “She always did. I miss her so much.”

  That day, Sharon had taken Justin on her proper tour of her tiny home. He already knew what the rooms looked like, having stayed there since the wedding, but she took him around to the lumps and bumps and chips and cracks, naming each one as incidents that had happened when Trixie was little - all the parts of their lives that he’d missed. Now, he saw the house in a whole new light, full of life and memories and little remnants of the past.

  “This one is sweet.” Justin picked up another of the photos spread across Sharon’s - their - bed. “How old is she here?”

  The photo showed Trixie, cheesing at the camera from her perch on Sharon’s shoulders. Her blonde hair was in two plaits, with a pink cowboy hat on her head and a blue princess dress. Sharon was giggling up at her daughter, seemingly unaware that the photo was being taken, in a summer dress that matched Trixie’s.

  Sharon studied it, smiling faintly, then flipped it over. On the back, almost illegible writing read ‘Princess Trixabelle Parton (3) and Mama Sharon (21) go on an adventure to the marketplace to find some lunch (MS) and defeat some evil (PTP).’

  “Those were the days.” She murmured, biting her lip. “I used to wonder how different my life would be without having Trixie, but she made everything better. I’m sure drinking at twenty one is fun, but playing with Princess Trixabelle Parton was fun too. There’s no comparison.”

  Justin kissed her forehead. “God, you’re fucking magical, you know that?”

  Sharon’s eyes were bright with unshed tears, which she dabbed at in an unsuccessful attempt to prevent them from falling. In spite of herself, she giggled a little.

  “I can’t believe she’s all gr-grown up, I still worry about her so much. She better send me another letter soon.” She paused. “I really miss these days.”

  Unable to stand the sight of her tears, Justin pulled Sharon closer and closer until her face was buried in his chest yet again. Once he could feel her sobs gently deteriorating into laughter, he pulled her away and tucked the photo into his pocket.

  “I’ll tell you what. We should go on our own market adventure today. Let’s buy something weird and make a day of it. We could even take a boat to the mainland and see if Trixie’s sent anything for us. I asked the guy on the boat when he gave you the letter last week, and he said that he’s happy to pass on letters but we’ll have to collect any parcels for ourselves.”

  Sharon considered him. “You know what… that sounds nice! I’ll get dressed, hold on.”

  In a matter of moments, she’d removed her pyjama top with an extravagant flourish, causing Justin to burst into laughter.

  “I swear I’ve put weight on, this is your fault.” She balled the shirt up and threw it at Justin’s head, childishly blowing raspberries at him when he ducked and missed it. “Look at me!”

  She poked her stomach, puffing her cheeks out. Rolling his eyes, Justin threw her shirt back.

  “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Put some clothes on, nympho.”

  Sharon laughed appreciatively. “Fair, fair. Do you think we could skip the market, though? Recently the smell of all the fish has been making me really nauseous, and I don’t wanna throw up on you in that shirt. You look good in that shirt.”

  It wasn’t long after their day out that Justin started to suspect. Of course, he’d never blindly say a thing out loud, for fear of castration via kitchen knives, but he was definitely beginning to notice a few telling changes, even if Sharon wasn’t. The nausea, for example. The breath-taking way she’d started to fill her clothes.

  In fact, he tried to mention it to her once. She was having none of it.

  “Nope. Where did you get that from?”

  “I just thought maybe-”

  “You’re crazy, Justin. I love you, but you’re crazy.”

  “I mean, we have been-”

  “It’s just not realistic, babe!”

  “It’s possible, I guess I just-”

  “Possible? At my age?”

  “You’re not old! In fact, you’re perfectly-”

  “You’re off your head, babe. I think the sea salt is getting to your brain.”

  “But don’t you think-”

  “Nah, it can’t be. Justin, I’m not pregnant.”

  So they dropped the subject. She wasn’t, because Justin was clearly crazy and seeing things that weren’t there. She continued to deny it even when he hadn’t brought it up, which made him laugh. Justin knew Sharon wasn’t exactly… bright. Eventually she’d catch on.

  ‘Eventually’ turned out to be a week from their debate. Justin was sprawled across the bed, half-asleep in sweatpants and a face-mask that she’d insisted they both try. He was forced awake as the bathroom door slammed open, revealing a distressed Sharon with a mouthful of toothpaste foam, a toothbrush in one hand and a pregnancy test in the other.

  “‘Ow did thi’ ‘appen?” She managed to say, leaning into the sink to spit and then returning. “How?!”

  Justin shrugged. “I guess someone decided that the best way to clean your teeth is with a little brush on the end of a stick, so you can really get in there and scrub.”

  Sharon dropped the toothbrush. “Not that, doofus. This!”

  “Did… Did you forget that we’ve been having like… a lot of sex?” Justin tried.

  She shook her head. “Well, of course not.”

  “And the fact that we ran out of condoms within a week?”

  “No.”

  “And that when I told you, you said it didn’t matter and we didn’t need any more?”

  “No.”

  “Well… that’ll be why.”

  Justin watched Sharon’s face, trying to gauge her feelings. She was almost impossible to read sometimes, what with years of hiding her feelings under her belt. He decided to tread carefully, pushing down the rising excitement that he felt inside him.

  “But… we’re old!” She protested. “I really didn’t think this could happen, if I’m honest.”

  Smiling gently, Justin beckoned her to come and lay on the bed with him. The sun was just starting to set, and as she nestled into his arms, golden sunlight filtered through the window and made patterns on the wall. Sharon kept staring at the test in her hand, encompassed by Justin’s warmth.

  “How do you feel about this?” He whispered.

  Sharon swallowed. “It’s… unexpected. How… how do you feel?”

  “I feel amazing.” He admitted quietly, his heart softening as Sharon smiled. “I can be here for you this time, every step of the way.”

  He placed his hand on top of Sharon’s, both of them on her stomach. For a few, peaceful moments, they lay there in silence.

  Sharon was first to break it. “God, I can’t believe those bitches were right. It’s like Raja and Jinkx can predict the fucking future.”

  Justin laughed. “Well. As I’m sure you’ll remember, I’m in if you’re in.”

  The nostalgia registered on Sharon’s face instantly. The first time they’d met - all those years ago - the two of them said it a lot. When faced with a freezing cold plunge pool and no clothes, Justin simply shrugged “I’m in if you’re in.” When coming up with a plan to cause some minor havoc, the two of them in pain from laughing so hard, Sharon managed “I’m in if you’re in!”

  It had been years since either of them had said or even heard those words.

  “I’m in.”

[tumblunni]

Phewwww finally back to finishing up my ‘Bunni Plays Orion’ posts! I finished the game and it just let me down SO MUCH that I had to take a break before I post up my thoughts n stuff. ALAS! godddd SO MUCH wasted potential and SO MANY things rushed through and SO MUCH screentime wasted on long rambling descriptions of irrelevant stuff instead of actually exploring any of these infinately better directions! but the art is so good (albiet inconsistant) and the voiceacting is SO good seriously its better than a lot of triple A games and I feel like an asshole criticizing this story when so many people on the team were clearly passionate about it... seriously it even has a fuckin PROG ROCK THEME TUNE SUNG BY THE VOICEACTORS I feel SO BAD for these people that I didnt enjoy their lil passion project it sucks that effort doesn’t necessarily equal success, cos everyone has their own preferences on things I’m sure SOMEONE out there must have enjoyed this as much as it deserves, but to me its just like a constant empty void with tantalizing hints of directions i would have preferred the plot to go into...

ANYWAY HERE WE ARE

I’m gonna go explore the other two routes, and apparantly this is the big branching point choice for whatever reason there’s no route where cyrus doesnt turn evil/you don’t discover he’s evil (wasted potential again), its just whether or not you manage to escape from him or have someone else rescue you. (again, a big example of how your choices dont friggin matter...) I didn’t imagine you’d just be able to elbow him in the ribs and run off, easy as pie! They try and make a vague excuse for why he NEVER USES HIS DAMN POWERS TO CATCH YOU EXCEPT WHEN THE PLOT DEMANDS IT but seriously, you also just had like a twenty minute scene of him beating the fuck out of you with his bare hands so why is he suddenly unable to overpower you here??????

Another moment where the holo-pad’s written description doesn’t seem to align with how it appears as a wristwatch in CG art. Seriously, its described just like a regular phone! Why would it be exceptional enough to mention you’re holding your wrist at your side? And with the way it looks in CG art it projects an image into the air in front of you, so wouldnt this be MORE CONSPICUOUS if you’re shooting a giant floating face off to the left of you and not even looking at it??? EVERYONE WOULD SEE VIRGIL RIGHT NOW. EVERYONE.

...why am i thinking so much about this

Most of the choices in this route are really boring and reptitive. It gets even worse on the second branch from this one, seriously! Whenever protagonist is left alone without another character telling him what to do, we just have long scenes of him wandering between the various places he’s meant to be in other routes. It’s taking lack of choice to a whole new level! A boring level! Seriously its JUST walking scenes, with a big internal monologue just going ‘i wonder wtf is going on, i wonder if i can trust virgil’ like FIVE TIMES IN SUCCESSION. There’s no real plot except random doubts that seem completely unprompted, to make sure these routes are still as long as the other ones even though you take much longer to reach the important characters...

See what I mean? I didn’t show it in these posts but there’s already like a five paragraph scene of GOSH GASP OH NO ANGST TO CYRUS BEING EVIL I DONT KNOW IF CYRUS IS EVIL back before he punches you in the first place And now its somehow deserving of a whole new CG image just to show it again. Seriously, they assign these random alternate art style pics at the most random of irrelevant moments! And.. like.. they don’t even explore the emotional ramifications or anything! Its literally just HEY THIS THING HAPPENED GASP WHAT A SHOCK. *ends with no development* And no we dont ever get any explanation for why cyrus was pretending to be your friend, and no cyrus didnt really have any actual affection for you or any complex personality traits. And no he doesnt actually do ANYTHING in ANY ROUTE except act as the enforcer for the bigger bad guy we never see until the last five seconds. And he barely ever even uses his time powers! And he doesnt have any REASON to be doing anything he’s doing! and he just vanishes from the plot whenever he’s not needed! he only exists to be an excuse to push the other characters into whatever situation the writers need at the moment. He has no agency or motivation and it feels like they dont even know where he IS when he’s out of sight, seriously. is he just chillin in the break room. does his time power make him move at the speed of plot. SORRY IM JUST VERY FRUSTRATED BY THIS! Seriously what was teh POINT of making him be a fake friend for the first five minutes? if we’re not gonna get any character development for either of them after the revelation... they coulda just introduced him right here as mr unnamed enemy enforcer who does nothing, and that would have probably saved a lot of goddamn time! I LIKED FAKE CYRUS A LOT BETTER. HE LOOKED LIKE HE HAD REASONS TO EXIST.

Oh and yeah this is what I mean about the protagonist just waiting around til various characters tell him what to do. Virgil just suddenly tells you where to go. Okay. Seriously it takes SO LONG for there to actually be any sort of legitimately interesting exploration of his ability to see all the timelines simultaneously and know everything you have to do. For the rest of the time its just an excuse for him to tell you stuff you’d otherwise never find out. But only tell you it on one route even though it wouldve been useful a million other times. And blablabla contrived ‘something something paradoxes’ excuse for why he does this...

Oh, and this is Mari’s only appearance on this half of the routes. Aside from the weird mandatory stalking sequence at the start of the game SERIOUSLY WHY WAS THAT EVEN THERE! in EVERY route you end up going back in time three days so it never even happened... Anyway, in this version Virgil tells you to tell her ‘hey i know you’re part of the resistance and i wanna meet issaku’, which causes her to beat you up like a jackass instead of taking you to see him which makes NO SENSE cos she takes you to see him on 2/4 routes, and the only difference is that in those ones you DONT ask to see him. She’s somehow more willing to drag you along into her super secret operation when she thinks you’re a total useless stranger! I mean, at least it works out tho cos they find out you have time powers and blah, but it was a complete coincidence! It feels like Mari is just either nice or awful depending on what the plot requires of her. Same for the rebellion in general. And they arent even really mentioned in ANY of the other routes, they only exist to be an excuse for why the villain guy wants to destroy your town. They dont even get to show up in the true ending epilogue...

Anyway, this is the true only reason Mari appears in this route. She decks u in the face and you time fart away~! Every route has to have a scene where you discover your powers, so that all the later stuff can make sense. But sometimes it feels like it was ACTUALLY an important part of the story, and sometimes it feels like they literally just threw it in at the least second to have an excuse why you can use your powers later. And sometimes you still get continuity confusion where it feels like you suddenly know how to use them for no reason... And also its never explained why you were never able to use your powers before??? If its so easy to suddenly manifest them as soon as you’re told they exist...

And then the choice here between the final two routes is just “Virgil mentioned the name of some random woman I’ve never heard of, should I go find her or not?” its got way less of a coherant narrative structure than the two rebellion routes.

[aliensmoothie]

i finally finished amnesty today ! yay !